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wiypt-writes · 4 years

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Stark Spangled Banner

Ch 1. Back Into The Field

Intro: Picking up a few months on from the events of Stark Spangled Man, Katie finds herself on desk bound duty following a disciplinary for ignoring Fury’s orders. But when she’s finally released, and disaster strikes on the first mission she’s run in months, she kinda wishes she’d stayed there.

Warnings: Bad language, mentions of blood, injury, angst and a minor character death.

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Katie Stark

A/N: So here we go. A relaunch of SSB thanks to my other blog being flagged. For those of you who are new, welcome! I hope you enjoy. And to all you current Stark Spangled Readers, welcome back, You might spot a few subtle differences as we go through, as things I’m not happy with have been rewritten but don’t worry, nothing will impact the mine lines in the hot mess that is Stark and Rogers.

As always, please leave your comments or send me messages, asks, anything. I love you all!

Disclaimer: This is a pure work of fiction and classified as 18+. Please respect this and do not read if you are underage. I do not own any characters in this series bar Katie Stark and the other OCs. By reading beyond this point you understand and accept the terms of this disclaimer.

Stark Spangled Banner Masterlist // Main Masterlist

March 2013.

Well, most of them.

Katie couldn’t imagine surviving without an ice cold beer on a hot summer’s day, but she also didn’t function until she had her morning cup of Joe. It was a tough choice to make.

Not today though, she needed coffee. And lots of it. After ‘going rogue’ to chase the Mandarin with her brother, month’s later Fury was still pissed and as such was basically giving her the most boring thing he could think of- working through piles of mission reports to analyse and cross reference with others to pick up on common threads .To be honest, she didn’t mind it too much. After the excitement of the festive period she had welcomed a relatively quiet return to work, and didn’t particularly give a shit what Fury thought about her either.

She circling a part of the hard copy of the report she was working on with highlighter pen, before glancing back at her computer screen to cut and paste it into the Scrapbook App she used to trace trends with, letting out a groan. Who was she kidding? Desk duty sucked ass.

*****

Steve’s morning wasn’t going much better.

Whilst he wasn’t desk bound, after a particularly gruelling Ops Training session during which one of the newest kids suffered a broken nose after colliding painfully with a stray shock baton, he was almost wishing he was. Following a quick debrief, he checked his schedule on his phone and found he was free now for the rest of the day so he showered and headed up to find Katie. He found her in her office, paper in her hand as she stared at her computer screen, eyes narrowed. Steve watched her for a moment, taking in the way her nose crinkled as she read something, her bottom lip being dragged under her top teeth as she continued her work, completely unaware he was there. With a groan she dropped the notes she’d been holding to the desk and ran her hand through her dark hair.

Steve felt he was interrupting something, even though he knew he wasn’t, but he also didn’t want to appear like he’d been watching her either, which he totally had. So he gave a little cough and, as she turned round, her pretty face cracking into a smile which he returned.

“Hey! How was training?”

“Don’t ask.” He let out a snort.

“That bad huh?”

“In a fashion.” He nodded, leaning on the door frame. “You had lunch?”

“Nope.”

“Wanna come get some?”

She nodded instantly “God yes. Can we get FroYo after?”

“Yeah but don’t let me pile it with all that crap this time!” he shot her his best playfully disapproving look as he remembered his first trip the Frozen Yoghurt stall. He had loaded his with all sorts of different things and the result had been beyond foul.

Katie gave a laugh and picked up her jacket, shrugging it on. Standing up straight, he moved to allow her to step through the door and followed her to the elevator.

“Stick to chocolate chip, mint and cookie dough.” She said, stepping into it. “Trust me.”

They strode across the foyer and into the early spring sun. Katie pulled her jacket tighter around herself as they crossed the street, shivering a little in the cool breeze.

“How are you just wearing a shirt?” she looked at Steve as he fell into step besides her, making sure he was on the side nearest the road. He noticed that she’d long since given up chiding him on this old fashioned habit after he had revealed it was something he used to do for his mom too, and Bucky’s younger sister. In fact, today, he swore he saw something that looked like a soft smile flicker on her lips when he positioned himself on her left, but as quick as he noticed it, it was gone.

“It’s not too bad.” He grinned. “I’ve been through worse.” He opened the door to the Deli for her and followed her in as they took their place in the queue. After a moment or two he became aware that she was looking at him.

“What?” he asked, turning to her exasperatedly. Katie couldn’t help but grin, she enjoyed winding the usually mild mannered man up

“I’m trying to imagine how you would look with a beard. And with shorter hair.” she mused, causing the Captain to roll his eyes.

“Not gonna happen.”

“What the hair cut or the beard?”

“Neither.”

“Spoil sport.”

“Captain America doesn’t have a beard.” he shook his head.

“No but, Steve Rogers could…”

She was impossible, but Steve couldn’t help but want to laugh. This playfulness was the thing that he enjoyed the most, how she could just treat him like any other punk she knew.

“Did anyone ever tell you you’re exhausting?” he rolled his eyes, a smirk playing on his face as she stepped forward in the queue.

“Yeah, you.” she spun round to face him, grinning “Several times. But you still come back for more.”

“Well I have the distinct impression if I didn’t you’d hunt me down anyway”

They ordered and ate their lunch, Steve filling her in on the ops drill and after Fro-Yo they made arrangements to slob out that evening at his with a film. They walked back to the Triskellion where Katie headed back to her office to continue sifting through the Mount Everest of reports she had to do. As with anything, once she got the bit between her teeth, she completely zoned out. It was only when she heard a gabble of voices all bidding each other goodbye that she looked up from her work. It was dark outside, and past six.

“Shit.” she groaned as the realisation washed over her. She was supposed to be at Steve’s for half past. She clicked to save her work whilst calling him at the same time, phone sandwiched between her cheek and shoulder.

“So…I’m running late.” She apologised the instant he answered. He chuckled.

“I thought that you said the one good thing about being confined to desk duties was that you set the hours.”

“Yeah, well I got caught up in something, but I’m leaving now. Do you want me to grab pizza on the way?”

“Sounds good, not Chicago Style though. I’m hankering for a proper piece of pie.”

“God you’re such a New Yorker.” She rolled her eyes.

“You say it like it’s a bad thing.” His voice took on a mock hurt tone and she could imagine him pouting on the other end of the phone.

“Hmmm, I’m undecided. Right, I’m leaving now. See you soon.”

“Drive safe.”

“What are you my dad?” she snorted at his stern instruction.

“Old enough to be.” he shot back.

“Touche.” she sniggered, cutting the call

*******

“Boring New York style for Mr S Rogers…” she spoke into the intercom at the main door to Steve’s apartment complex and he buzzed her in. By the time she’d climbed the stairs to his floor he was waiting, leaning on the door frame.

“Bout time.” He muttered, taking the boxes off her “Was about to send a search party.”

“Mario’s was packed.” Katie said, kicking off her sneakers and heading straight through to his kitchen to grab a beer out of his fridge without waiting for him to offer, knowing he wouldn’t. He didn’t need to.

Steve headed into the living room, depositing the thee boxes on the coffee table before he sank onto the couch and reached straight in for one of the pepperoni slices. A few moments later Katie flopped down next to him, handing him a beer.

“What we ticking off the list tonight?” she asked.

“A Few Good Men.” he said, nodding at the TV where he had queued the movie up ready.

“Wait, did you manage to navigate that Android box all by yourself?” She looked at him and he sighed.

“I’m not completely useless ya know.”

“Jury’s out.” she teased, curling her legs up onto the sofa next to her.

They watched the movie. Steve got most of the references within it. He chuckled in the right places, and laughed out loud when Katie was unable to stop herself uttering the immortal line You can’t handle the truth. When the credits began to roll, Katie unfolded herself from where she had been sat and they launched into Steve’s favourite part of Movie Nights- the post film analysis.

“Who was the guy who played the colonel, Jessup?” he looked at her.

“Jack Nicholson. Amazing actor. He’s in a few on your list.”

“He was good. And I know he was supposed to be the good guy so to speak but Kaffee annoyed me a little. He was so arrogant.”

“He reminds me of Tony” Katie sniggered.

“Well, I didn’t want to say anything” Steve gave a little smirk and Katie shrugged.

“I get what you mean though. He is an ass, and it pisses me off a little the romance angle they take with him and Galloway. I mean, she’s portrayed as this strong woman, in the male dominated military woman and they still have to go there.”

“It does seem to be a tried and tested format.” Steve nodded, leaning back against the cushions on his couch “Boy meets girl, boy likes girl, boy wins girl over…even the movies I saw back in before I took a sub-zero nap were the same.”

“I suppose it appeals to the hopeless romantic in all of us.” Katie shrugged.

They continued to chat for a bit longer until Katie glanced at her watch, and seeing the time, decided to call it a night. Steve walked her down to her car, he always did without fail, another thing she had given up chiding him for and when he came back upstairs and got in the shower, he found himself straying back to the first time he had seen her, the minute she had stepped into the light in the boxing gym and he’d found himself looking into the greenest eyes he had ever seen in his life.

The more he stood there in the stream of hot water, thinking about her, the more he started to feel something…well…different. And he couldn’t put his finger on it. Was it that he found her attractive? Well of course he did. To be honest, he reckoned you’d have to be blind not to. And if he was totally honest, since he’d seen her the first time in that little boxing gym in New York he had noticed how pretty she was. She had the figure of the stars of his time. Hour glass waist, brunette hair, shapely ass and legs and quite large breasts considering she was so slim. But what did it for him were her eyes. Deep, sparkling emeralds that he could lose himself in quite happily. And that smile, that fucking smile that could make him stop in his tracks when she flashed it.

But it was more than just that, she was…well…just Katie.

It was strange, really, she reminded him so much of Peggy in some ways, but in others she was so different. Both were vivacious, smart, strong willed and beautiful. But where Peggy had been harsh, after a military upbringing, Katie had a softer edge to her. She was still ferocious at times, but she was a people person, and somehow knew exactly how to explain and understand what he was trying to say even when he struggled to himself. She made him feel at ease. With that in mind it wasn’t surprising they had grown so close. He could trust her and knew that she would do anything for him because she was a good person. And she made it so easy to be around, he didn’t feel a shred of awkwardness around her.

He hadn’t thought he’d ever find himself a friend he could be as honest and open with again, one he would happily lay his life on the line for, not just out of a sense of duty but out of a sense of love and friendship.

Who you trying to kid, Rogers?

He knew his feelings went deeper than that. All those times he’d felt irritation at other men looking at her or touching her, all those times he’d looked at her and just wanted to smile because she was just her… the fear he had felt when he had known she was off chasing the Mandarin and he wasn’t able to help…none of that was anything to do with mere friendship.

He leaned his forehead against the tiles of the shower cubicle and groaned. He was crushing on his best friend.

He was so fucked. *******

Katie’s desk arrest didn’t last much longer. Two weeks later she was catapulted back into the field, on what was supposed to be a simple op, simple by SHIELD standards, anyway. They had a request from the Cuban government – all very hush, hush, of course –to take down a drug lord who ran a cartel SHIELD had tangled with last year.

Katie, in her role as Mission Analyst, read the files and all the intel, pulled together a briefing and delivered it, answering questions that came her way from the team and then handed over to Steve when it was his turn to take the floor. He started issuing out his orders, and informed everyone that the three newest recruits would be joining them as it would be a fairly straight forward op to ease them into.

And it had been, for the most part, until one of those new recruits, Jack Adams, had frozen mid fire fight and as a consequence he’d taken three bullets to the chest. Which shouldn’t have been an issue given the armour they all wore. But when the man failed to get up, Katie knew there was something very, very wrong.

“Adams is down!” she loudly spoke into her radio as she took aim at the hostile responsible. As soon as she was sure the round she had let off had hit her target, she broke cover to get to Adams, as she was closest to him. She skidded to the floor, pressing her hand to his chest and her other reached to his face, turning it to look at her.

“I got you, Adams, look at me.” she urged gently, her hand warm, wet and slick with the young man’s blood. Steve dropped besides her and she turned to face him.

“Armour piercing rounds.” She shook her head. “Steve, I can’t stop the bleeding.” Her tone left the Captain in no doubt as to how worried she was and he looked around frantically for help.

“Medic, NOW! We need emergency evac…”

“Stay with us, Jack.” Katie reached into her belt and retrieved a tab of morphine as he young man’s hand gripped her other whilst she administered the pain relief.

“Son, you’re gonna be fine.” Steve spoke and Adams’ horrified eyes turned to Steve. The soldier swallowed, fighting to keep his face calm. He’d seen that expression so many times on the battle field, the one that told him the man who lay injured knew he was injured beyond repair, that there was nothing to be done for him. But this was now seventy years into the future, medical science had worked so many wonders since then, they had to be able to do something, right?

“RUMLOW WHERE THE FUCK IS THAT MEDIC?” Katie screamed, her tone frantic.

“Still got hostiles on us!” Rumlow replied over the coms. “Evans has taken four down but they’re approaching from the right! We need to cover the medics in and now you’re down there…”

Steve instantly looked round before he looked back at Katie “We’ll have to take him ourselves”

She bit her lip, looking at the young man, then up to Steve again. Everything in their training told them not to move casualties, but Steve knew if they stayed here he was going to bleed out. Katie seemed to come to the same conclusion and she nodded.

“Alright. Brock, we’re coming to you. Have the medics prep the bay on the jet.. Evans, we need top cover.”

“Roger, Cap…”

“Jack, we’re gonna move you now.” Katie looked at him, her voice calm and level as besides her, Steve moved to take the injured man into a lift over his shoulder. Once he had him positioned, he gave a small jerk of his head and Katie picked up his shield in one hand, and her pistol in the other as they broke cover, sprinting across the front of the industrial yard towards the jet. In the corner of his eye, Steve spotted two hostiles moving but before he could shout a warning, Katie had fired off two shots, the thumps and lack of returning fire meaning each bullet had hit its target. Soon they were joined by Rumlow and Rollins who flanked them up the ramp where Katie dropped Steve’s shield to the floor with a clang and offered her hand back to Adams as Steve placed him gently on the stretcher.

“It’s gonna be ok.” Katie soothed him as the medics bustled around, her eyes glancing up every so often to watch what they were doing.

“Can you tell my mom I love her and, and my dad.” Adams was mumbling now and Katie shook her head.

“You can tell them yourself.” She told him fiercely. “You’ll be fine, I promise.”

“We’re locked down outside, local authorities are handling it now.” Rumlow informed Steve who had stepped back from where Katie was knelt by the injured man. “How is he?”

Steve turned to Rumlow, shaking his head sadly. “Not good. He lost a lot of blood.”

At that point Katie suddenly drew back slightly, looking at the hand held in hers, before she glanced at the medic who was sadly shaking his head. Katie’s shoulders slumped as her eyes closed, face screwing up into a pained expression and Steve pinched the bridge of his nose with his thumb and middle finger as he realised that the young man had lost his final fight.

“Shit.” Rumlow muttered.

“Radio base” Steve turned to Rumlow his voice soft “Let’s get him home.”

*******

Writing mission reports wasn’t Katie’s favourite thing to do, but this one was awful. So she’d treated it like ripping off a band aid, and after a horrific night’s sleep, she’d been at the Triskelion early to get it done. As a result it was little after ten am, she was done for the day and was about to head home until she heard a familiar voice.

“Eat me…eat me…” The voice was accompanied by a bag from her favourite bakery, which was hovering in the space between the door to the office and the frame, before Clint Barton’s head poked round the side, a grin plastered on his face.

“Hey!” She beamed at her friend as he dropped a cup holder containing two coffees and the bag onto her desk before taking a seat, scooting the wheeled chair over the floor towards her.

“Heard you had a rough time of it yesterday so I brought donuts and almond croissants. And coffee.”

“Hawkeye, you are a godsend.” Katie smiled, taking a large drink and leaning back, closing her eyes.

“That the first time you’ve lost a man on a mission?” Clint asked.

“Other than Coulson.” she shrugged. “Shit, Adams was twenty-three Clint. He had his whole life ahead of him.”

Clint watched as she rubbed at her temple before reaching into the bag and pulling out an almond croissant. She couldn’t remember when she had last eaten, it must have at least been before the mission.

“How’s Cap taken it?”

“On the outside he seems okay, but I know he blames himself. Keeps saying he shouldn’t have taken him.” Katie shrugged “He’s gone with Fury to see Adams’ parents. Rather him than me.”

“This job is hard.” Clint said after a moment or two pause. “We fight to keep everyone safe, but y’know, sometimes not everyone makes it. Thing is, if we can’t find a way to deal with that, then maybe next time no one gets saved at all.”

“You mean like Collateral damage?” she snorted, shaking her head.

“No, I mean that everyone one of us that are out in the field know the risks Nova, hell last year 7 of us took on a horde of Aliens in New York. For hours we fought them, and did any of us give a second thought to our own safety? No, because that’s what we do.”

His words made sense. She knew they did, but that didn’t stop the feeling in her stomach that if she had done her research more, maybe she could have spotted something that would have told them about the armour piercing rounds.

*******

Adams’ parents already knew he was dead. Fury had the local authorities call ahead, common practice now, but still, Steve found himself sat on their couch, talking, informing them all about their son’s last moments. They hadn’t shouted, hadn’t screamed or blamed him. Instead, they’d thanked him for what he had done and for bringing him back so they could hold a proper burial.

By the time he got back to base, he was exhausted.

“Here.” Fury handed him a glass of scotch from the bottle he had pulled out of his desk. Steve took it, dropping onto one of the sofas at the side of the large office, Fury settling into the other. Steve knew the drink couldn’t get him drunk, but he liked the momentary buzz he got that lasted all of sixty seconds post sip, and the comforting burn it gave when he swallowed.

The pair of them sat in silence for a few moments before Fury sat forward, his eye fixed on Steve.

“Ever done that before, a death message?” he asked.

“Can’t say I have. Wasn’t really my job back in the day.” Steve shrugged, undoing his tie and popping the top button of his dress shirt.

“Worst part of the job. Doesn’t matter how many times you do it, never gets any easier.” Fury ran his hand over his face, and it struck Steve how tired his boss actually looked.

“Yeah, it isn’t exactly up there with my favourite thing to do.” Steve rolled his tie up and shoved it into the pocket of his old Army uniform pants.

“How’s Nova?” Fury asked.

“She’s upset.” Steve sighed “But she’s strong, she’ll be okay. I’m gonna head over and see how she is later.”

“You two spend a lot of time together outside of work.” Fury commented, innocently enough but there was something in his tone, something that was almost good natured accusation.

“Not a problem is it, Sir?” Steve asked, keeping his face straight.

“No, not at all.” Fury said “Why do you think I partnered you up in the first place? She’s a people person…”

“She’s a good friend.” Steve nodded “We get on.”

“Glad to hear it.” Fury nodded. There was another moment’s pause before he spoke again. “There’s going to be a debrief with the Secretary of Defense tomorrow.”

Steve sighed “If they’re looking to blame someone, the buck stops with me. I should never have taken the kid.”

“Bullshit.” Fury said simply “I’ve read the reports. From what they say, he just froze.”

“He wasn’t experienced enough.”

“Taking risks is part of this job. It’s a dangerous gig.” Fury held his gaze. “It was a straight forward in and out job Captain. What happened was an accident. A tragic one, but an accident none the less. From the reports, neither you nor Stark could have done any more to save his life.”

Steve shrugged, the words were kind but didn’t help him feel any better.

Three glasses of scotch later, Steve shook the director’s hand and left the office, pulling out his phone. He didn’t want to appear like he was checking up on Katie, so he pinged her a text, dressing it up like it was him who needed to see her, which wasn’t a complete lie. He did. He was craving the normality she gave him.

Can I come over? I could do with seeing a friendly face

He read it a few times, before deciding it was casual enough before he sent it. The reply was almost instantaneous.

My door is always open for you. And I made Mac and Cheese. Plenty left.

He couldn’t help but smile. One of the best things about this new life was the food, and her Mac and Cheese was frankly his favourite thing to eat on the planet.

He changed into a pair of sweats and a hoody, hastily making his way to Katie’s penthouse and the smile she gave him when he walked into her place instantly made him feel at ease.

“Hey.” she crossed the space towards him and gave him a hug which he happily melted into, a hug they both needed.

“How did it go?” she asked, pulling away.

“As well as can be expected.” He sighed as he followed her into the kitchen, dropping into the stool on the other side of the breakfast bar. “His mom broke down but they didn’t shout or yell.”

Katie flipped the lid off a beer and handed it to him. He took it, with a nod of thanks and pulled a large swig before he rest his hands on the counter, staring at the bottle.

He was brooding and blaming himself, Katie could tell, so she gently lay her hand on his, reaching over the counter.

“It wasn’t your fault Steve.” she spoke softly and he looked at her.

God, she did that all the time, knew what he was thinking. It gave him the unnerving impression that sometimes she could read his mind.

“I should have spotted that shooter.” he shook his head.

“I’m the fucking mission analyst.” she sighed. “I knew from last time those guys were packing, if I’d done more research, maybe I would have found out about the armour piercing rounds.”

“You can’t seriously blame yourself?” Steve’s frowned.

“Why not?” she shrugged sadly. She’d been over it a million times in her head that day and had come to the same conclusion every time. She should have spotted something, dug further. “I didn’t do my job.”

“Yes, you did.” he implored, his eyes locking onto hers “Your report clearly set out the layout, the learning from previous missions…Adams was just too inexperienced, I should never have taken him.”

There was a pause as the microwave pinged and Katie turned to look at it.

“You know, Clint made a good point before.” she reached in for the plate and the smell of the food made his stomach grumble again as she continued “This job, it’s hard. We fight to keep people safe but not everyone makes it back all the time…and if we can’t learn to live with that then maybe next time no one gets saved.”

“It feels like trading lives.” He took a deep breath as she placed the plate down in front of him “It’s just wrong.”

“I know.” She said, handing him some cutlery and sat down next to him.

“You eaten?” he asked, looking at her, suddenly aware she didn’t have a plate. She nodded.

“Couldn’t have waited until now, I’d have starved to death.” she said, shrugging.

“Hardly.” he replied, mouth full, instantly realising he had said the wrong thing as she narrowed her eyes at him.

“Is that a fat joke?” she asked, making him roll his eyes as he swallowed. That hadn’t been it at all, he was referring to the fact that she never actually stopped eating, despite her tiny frame she gave him a run for his money.

“No, that’s not what I meant. You’re tiny.” he said, almost choking on his food through his protests.

“So now you’re making short jokes?” She shot back. Steve looked at her, dismayed she thought he was being mean to her but then he spotted the look in her eyes and rolled his own.

“Punk.”

“Jerk” she shot back.

It was the perfect way to escape the trauma and stress of the last few days. Once they had finished eating the two of them flopped down on her large L shape sofa, Steve’s legs extended along one side of the L shape, her legs tucked underneath her as she leaned against his shoulder. He couldn’t help but notice the smell of her shampoo…apple, he thought, along with her perfume. Her proximity was making his head buzz but he wasn’t about to move her, the contact was comforting. And it clearly was for her too as about an hour or so into the film- the first in the Lord of The Rings trilogy- he felt her head growing heavy. He glanced down and saw that her eyes were closed and, as he watched, her head slipped slightly. He shifted so that he could catch her gently, and grabbed a cushion from behind him, placing it against his leg. He manoeuvred her head so that she was lay down, gently brushing her hair off her face. She stirred slightly, snuggling down further into the cushion as he absentmindedly rubbed between her shoulder blades as her breathing grew gentle and even.

Steve stayed like that, engrossed in the film right to the end, surprisingly. He had enjoyed it. Katie hadn’t woken up, and he looked down debating whether or not to wake her or simply carry her through to her bedroom. In the end he decided to do neither, instead he reached for the remote as he sifted through to find something else to watch. He didn’t want to leave just yet, he was too comfy and too at ease. Picking one of his favourites, Casablanca, he settled down, getting himself comfy as he immersed himself in the familiar world of Rick’s Café Americain. At one point he felt his eyes growing heavy and he lay his head back, deciding to rest them for just a little while…

**** Katie was jolted awake, quite violently, and as she jerked into an upright position she saw exactly why. Steve was thrashing in his sleep, his face contorted in horror, small murmurs and whimpers slipping from his plump lips. She placed both her hands on his shoulder and shook him. Softly at first, then a bit stronger, trying to rouse him.

“Steve…” she gave him a harsher shake and his eyes flew open, wide in panic and she reached up to cup his face in her hands. “Hey, it’s okay. It was just a dream.”

Her soft voice filled Steve’s senses and, as he realised where he was and whose eyes were looking at him, he took a shaky breath and lay his head back.

Damned it, he’d fallen asleep and had a nightmare. On her sofa.

“Sorry,” he said, his voice croaky, “I err…”

“Don’t apologise, it’s fine.” Katie shook her head gently “I’ll get you a glass of water.”

Whilst she was gone he leaned forward, swinging his legs off the couch so his feet touched the floor, wiping his clammy head with his hands, the memory still flashing through his dream.

Cold air was blasting his hair back…there was a hole in the side of the train…then a flash of light and Bucky flew straight through the hole. “BUCKY…” he yelled, grabbing onto the side of the train, the bar in one hand as he stretched to reach his friend with the other.

“Steve…” The voice was louder, but not loud enough. No, he had to get to Bucky…

But he was gone, Steve was grasping at nothing but air.

Just a dream, Katie had said. It was anything but…

She appeared back in the room with a glass of water and he thanked her as she passed it to him. He took a large gulp, swallowing and was relieved when his breathing began returning to normal.

“You ok?” she asked, kindly as her hand gently knotted into his, her concern evident.

“Yeah, just a nightmare.” he nodded softly “I’ve not had one for a while.”

“Understandable with what’s happened. Wanna tell me what it was about?”

“It was Bucky.” he swallowed thickly “I was replaying the moment he fell. The moment he plummeted to his death from that Hydra train and I didn’t save him.”

Katie stayed silent for a moment before her hand curled round Steve’s shoulder and she pulled him to her, causing him to lay his head on her shoulder. “You know it wasn’t your fault.”

“I should have done more” The guilt ate Steve up every day, that he had survived. Why had he deserved that any more than Bucky?

“How?” she said again. “How could you have done anymore?”

"I should have gone after him.” he said quietly.

“What would’ve changed if you had?” Katie asked. “There’s no way he could have survived that fall.”

“He wouldn’t have been there if it wasn’t for me.“ He replied, "I should have gone after him, brought him home, done something.”

Katie remained quiet, her hand gently running through his hair which was nice, far too nice. He took a deep breath and sat up moving away from her touch.

"What time is it?”

“Nearly six in the morning” Katie glanced at her watch.

“You’re kidding?” Steve snorted.

“Nope. You want some coffee?” she stood up, stretching her arms above her head.

“Yeah if that’s ok.” he replied, following her to the kitchen. From her body language he could tell she was rolling her eyes, even if she wasn’t facing him.

“I don’t know if your Ma ever told you, but it’s rude to run out on a girl after you spend the night with her.”

“And as you know, I’m useless with women.” he sat down at the barstool on the breakfast bar. He watched her, but he didn’t say anything as she bustled about, throwing some bread in the toaster and then went to the fridge for the butter, marmalade and jam, sliding them onto the island. At that point Steve held his hands up.

“You don’t have to-” he started to say, but she silenced him with a glare, similar to the ones Peggy used to give him, the look that could stop him in his tracks it was that stern.

“Shut up.” she poured them both a cup of the coffee before adding milk and a spoon of sugar to each, passing one to him. The bread popped up from the toaster, and she put it on a plate before sliding it over to him and adding more bread to the machine.

His stomach rumbled and he gave in, smearing butter over his toast. He eyed the jam curiously. He’d had marmalade before but…

He looked at Katie and she nodded. “It’s good.”

So he added some, and after a bite he concluded she was right, and nodded in agreement. Once the next round of toast was done she sat next to him.

“So, when did I fall asleep.” she asked, swallowing her food.

“About an hour into the film.”

She shook her head “What an ass…”

“It wasn’t a problem.” He replied honestly as he took a bite of his breakfast. “To be honest I enjoyed it.”

“What, me drooling on your leg?”

He swallowed, his eyes wide “I meant the film.”

“I know.” she smirked.

***** Chapter 2

**Original Posting**

#stark spangled banner #relaunch #steve rogers #steve rogers fanfiction #katie stark #steve rogers x ofc #steve rogers x original female character

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slytherinbarnes · 4 years

Text

Sub Rosa [69]

xi. the dark year

Pairing: Bellamy Blake x reader

Word Count: 4.3k

Warnings: allusions to suicidal thoughts from previous chapter (5.01), mentions of death, language, anxiety.

Summary: The march to Shallow Valley begins...

a/n: next week we finish s5!!!! how we feeling!!!! the taglist for this series is open! I hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think!!!

previous chapter // season masterlist // series masterlist

The march is as boring as you expect it to be.

At some point guns are passed around and you end up with a rifle slung over your shoulder, one more thing you're forced to carry in your trek through the desert. It reminds you of leaving Becca’s lab after Praimfaya and searching for the rover, a story that you ultimately end up telling Bellamy about. And once you get started with one story of your time on Earth without him, he’s eager to hear more. You tell him about going to Polis and then Arkadia, nearly dying until a rainstorm came through and gave you and Clarke water, the sandstorm that destroyed the rover. You tell him about the journey to get more panels, when you and Clarke almost ended it all, and he senses your hesitation when you get to that part, not sure if you should tell him everything. But he reaches out and grabs your hand, threading your fingers together, reminding you that you’re always safe and home with Bellamy. So you tell him just how bad things got, how close to the end you truly were, until the Universe sent a miracle from the sky, a bird that led you to Shallow Valley.

His favorite stories are the ones you tell him about Madi. How she nearly killed you and Clarke both when you first met her, how she taught you both how to fish, and the two of you taught her English. Learning to drive the rover, and fight, living as a mini family in the valley, waiting for the rest of your family to return. The only thing you don't tell him about are the radio calls. You aren't sure why, maybe it’s embarrassment, maybe you’re worried he’ll think it was obsessive, you don't know. All you know is that he must not have heard a single one, because he never mentions them, and you’re sure he would have if he had heard them. Instead, you skip over all of the calls and focus on the good moments instead, the happy things, not sure you’re quite ready enough to tell him just how desperately you missed him.

At some point near the end of the first day, Bellamy’s radio comes to life with the sound of Echo’s voice, broken up and speaking Trig. “Belomi, hola. Yu sen ai in?”

Bellamy, come in. Do you read me? You and Bellamy exchange a look, before he steps out of the marching group and off to the side, with you, Monty, and Harper right behind him. He lifts the radio and says, “Echo-”

You reach out and put your hand over his own, lowering the radio for a second. “Wait, Bellamy, do you normally speak Trig like this? Or is there a reason?”

As soon as you say it, you see a look pass over his face, letting you know they don't normally communicate in Trigedasleng. Your warning reminds all of you of something you need to be careful not to forget: the enemy can hear you every time you use this radio. Bellamy lifts the radio again and you pull your hand away, and this time he answers in Trigedasleng. “Hakom Trig? Chit’s skechi?”

Why are we speaking Trig? What's wrong? He releases the button and you all stare at the radio in tense silence, waiting for her answer. “Emo get in bilaik yo’s komba raun. Yo don drop nishiv of.”

They know you're coming. You've lost the element of surprise. The answer hits you like a blow to the gut, making you sick. Without the element of surprise, this war is a massacre. You can see that Harper and Monty don’t look as shocked as you and Bellamy do, and you realize now their Trig must be limited, so you translate, “They know we're coming.”

Their reaction is immediate, the same as yours, and then Monty looks at you and asks, “Clarke?”

The question hits you like a second blow, more powerful than the last. The thought hadn't even crossed your mind, but your twin was the only other person that knew about the eye in the sky that could have snitched. You shake your head, anger flaring within you at the danger she has just put all of you in, and you grind out, “It had to be.”

Echo must start to worry about the silence from your end of the radio because she comes back on to say, “Belomi, yo gaf bak yo klin. Osir don hon daun ‘mo mavrik, den yo’s klir, komonou. Ba yo nou na komba hir nowe.”

Bellamy, you have to go back. We have their pilot, so you're safe for now. But you can't come here. You and Bellamy watch each other as she speaks, both of you translating the words at the same time. It’s weird to see him so proficient in Trigedasleng considering the few words he knew before he went to space, but when you think about it, teaching Madi English made you fluent in Trig too. Both of you are so different from the people you left behind, past versions of you now burned away by Praimfaya, but somehow your comfort with Bellamy hasn't changed. There’s so many new things you have to learn about him now, but there’s no doubt in your mind that he has your heart and you have his.

Bellamy lifts the radio, shaking his head, though Echo can't see it. “Nou na kom au. Chilja: osir nou na bak op, en osir nou na hod op. Kom fai sintaim osir kamp ouder. Yo gada daun in na lok osir op klir trei. Pas daun, nou mori noumou.”

Not possible. It's a long story, but we can't go back and we can't stop. We're five days out. You have that long to find us a safe way in. After that we run out of rations. You can see the devastation on Bellamy’s face at this new dilemma you've all somehow found yourself in. Echo’s voice comes through the radio one last time before falling silent, “We're on it. Be safe, over and out.”

You can hear the worry in her voice, and a wave of anxiety washes over you, wondering if that worry is born from affection. But Bellamy being Bellamy, must sense your thoughts, and he reaches out and puts his hand on your cheek, whispering, “I love you, my radiant moon.”

“And I love you more than the stars.”

He smiles at you, one of those bright ones, and you realize this is the first time you’ve said those words to him since he came down to Earth. His smile is infectious, and it makes you smile, both of you temporarily forgetting your impending peril until Monty clears his throat and mutters, “The eye.”

The smiles drop from both of your faces, suddenly brought back to the present, and you shake your head. “Uh, right. We should probably tell Indra.”

“And Octavia.” You nod at Bellamy, agreeing, as he passes the radio to Monty. “Keep an ear out for our friends, in case they call again.”

“Will do.”

And with that, you all rejoin the army, and you and Bellamy march off in search of Indra. It doesn’t take long for you to find her, exactly where you last saw her: marching with Gaia and the other faithful. As soon as she sees the two of you approaching and catches the expression on your faces, she steps away from everyone, giving the three of you some privacy. You and Bellamy let her know what’s going on quickly, and a look of alarm passes over her face before she quickly regains her composure and nods towards the front of the army. “We need to inform Octavia.”

The three of you quicken your pace and make it to the front, only to be stopped by Miller. “What do you want?”

You can sense the anger radiating off of Indra and Bellamy in waves, so you walk slightly ahead of them, shifting Miller’s focus to you. “We need to talk to Octavia.”

He looks at you, skeptical, and you give him a pleading look. “It’s important, Miller. You know we wouldn't be here if it wasn't.”

You know he recognizes the truth in your statement, because he motions to a pair of guards walking nearby. “Disarm and follow me.”

You glance at Bellamy and he nods, agreeing to the terms, so you hand the guy to your right your rifle and knife before following Miller. Bellamy and Indra both follow you, and Miller announces your arrival to Octavia before stepping back slightly, but he sticks close enough to keep an eye on all of you. Indra is the first to speak, “You're marching us into a massacre.”

Octavia doesn't turn to look at any of you, her eyes firmly locked on the horizon ahead. “We'll see.”

“Echo radioed. The enemy knows you're coming.” She bristles slightly, and you can tell the news is affecting her even though she tries to pretend otherwise. “We don't need to worry about the missiles, but they're moving their weapons into position.”

Indra adds, “It's safe to assume that since there's only three realistic ways into the valley, that all three will be heavily defended.”

Bellamy, who has stayed silent as you and Indra do most of the talking, finally quips, “Echo's scouting now, looking for the best way in. But since we can't go back because you burned the farm, and since we can't stop because we'll starve, we thought we should let you know that you've killed your people.”

You look at Bellamy in shock, not expecting to hear the words come out of his mouth. You’re pissed at Octavia too, but you’re not eager to cross her again, your near death experience still too fresh in your memory. You grab his hand and whisper his name as a warning, “Bellamy.”

But he ignores you and snaps at his sister, “Enjoy your walk.”

He drops back and you glance at him and then to Indra, silently apologizing before you drop back and follow him. You get your weapons back and secure them to you before jogging after Bellamy and catching up to him near the back, but you can tell from the expression on his face that he doesn't want to talk. So instead, you slip your hand into his and stay by his side, allowing him his anger for now.

Eventually night falls and the marching stops, giving all of you a temporary reprieve from the long journey, at least until morning.

You and Bellamy set up your tent and then build a fire, and Monty and Harper set up their tent nearby before joining you around the warmth of the fire. All of you sit and eat your rations in silence before the other couple bids you both goodnight, leaving you and Bellamy alone. You finish up the last of your rations, just enough to keep you full for a few hours, before you pull out your Grounder knife, looking over the notches on the handle. By your count, it’s now missing a few, and as you start to wonder what you can use to add the next few lines, Bellamy’s hand reaches out to you, his own knife in his grip. You look up at him, taking the knife with a nod of thanks, unaware that anyone knows that you actually keep up with your knife kills. You might be embarrassed if it was anyone other than Bellamy, but judging by the look on his face, he seems to understand. You don’t count the kills like trophies, the way others might, you count the kills to remind you of what you’ve done. At this point, it’s hard to know how many people you’ve killed with guns, explosions, or levers that bring radiation. But this knife reminds you of the personal ones, the lives that you took in close proximity to another person, close enough to see the life drain from them. It’s a way to remind you of your humanity, a way to remind you that each of these kills affected you in some way, the same way the forgotten kills affect you, whether you realize it or not.

You add two tallies for the two Eligius prisoners you killed, before you pause and consider Cooper. You didn’t use this knife to kill her the way you usually would, but you did use it to cut a hole in her glove, sealing her fate before she even woke up. To you, it’s enough for you to know her death should stay on your mind. You shouldn't sweep it under the rug as another casualty of war. You need to remember how willing you were to kill her if it meant it could save everyone else, which ultimately didn’t happen. Cooper is dead and Wonkru is still marching on the valley, worms be damned.

As you add a third tally for Cooper, bringing your knife kills up to ten, you glance over at Bellamy, his gaze turned away from you. You take note of his clenched jaw and angry expression. “We have to talk about it eventually, Bellamy.”

“No, we don't.”

“Both of our sisters betrayed us.”

“Your sister betrayed us, probably to save Madi. And though it puts us in a shitty position, I can forgive her for that.” Bellamy turns to look at you, pulling in a deep breath. “My sister put us in the fighting pits together, after she forced you into making a deal that would save my life but end yours. She did that knowing how I feel about you.”

“Only after my sister ratted us out and left us there. If we’re keeping count, Clarke has betrayed us twice. And you’re right, both betrayals were probably to keep Madi safe, but at what expense to everyone else? To me? To you? I love Madi, she is my niece, my family, and I’d do anything to keep her safe. But sometimes Clarke’s decisions are reckless when it comes to Madi’s safety. She listens to the storm within her, just like you used to do, and doesn’t stop to consider every angle, every possibility. I’m not letting her off the hook that easy.”

Bellamy is quiet for a while, both of you thinking of your sister related drama, and when he finally speaks, his anger has cooled, though not completely, and his voice is soft. “I just can't forgive Octavia for nearly taking you from me. Not after I just got you back.”

The words melt you, your anger towards your sister forgotten as you reach out to comfort Bellamy. You pull him in for a kiss, understanding his fear of losing you, because you lived with it for six years when you lost him. When you pull away, you rest your foreheads together, keeping your eyes closed as you sit and enjoy the fact that you can even do this. Because Bellamy is back, and he loves you, and you’re alive, despite Octavia’s best efforts. You whisper, “You’re gonna have a hard time getting rid of me now. I don’t want to let you out of my sight, I’m so afraid of losing you again.”

He pulls away so he can look at you, his expression sad. “I have the same fear. It was so hard being on the Ring without you. It felt like a ghost was hanging around with me at every moment. I was searching for you everywhere, always disappointed when you weren’t there.”

You feel tears well up in your eyes, and you kiss him again, hoping it helps. This time when you pull away, he wraps you up into his arms and turns his face to the sky. You follow his gaze, both of you tracing constellations, and for the first time in six years, he asks, “Tell me about the stars?”

You look at him, feeling a rush of affection as you do, your voice cracking with emotion when you whisper back, “Of course.”

The second day of marching is just as awful as the first, though it’s now punctuated with an air of anxiety as you all march one day closer to your massacre.

The second night, all of you retire early, too tired to sit around and talk, but you wake up a few hours later, wide awake for some reason. You glance over at Bellamy, smiling down at his sleeping form, so peaceful as the worries of the world don't reach him in his dreams. Not wanting to disturb him, you quietly crawl out of the tent, taking the radio with you, just in case someone calls.

As you sit outside and look at the stars, you nearly jump out of your skin when the radio comes to life. “Belomi, hola.”

Bellamy, come in. You pick up the radio and answer, “Nou Belomi, en's ai. Wanlida.”

Not Bellamy, it’s me. Wanlida. You add your Grounder nickname at the end, not sure if she recognizes your voice. She immediately answers, “Osir don strat.”

We have a plan. You smile at the radio in your hand, feeling a rush of gratitude to your friends on the other side. “Tel ai op.”

Tell me. Echo immediately relays the plan to you in Trigedasleng, and at times, you start to think about how weird it is to be carrying on a conversation with your boyfriend’s ex. And though you get flashes of jealousy when you think about them together, you start to marvel at how talking to her now isn't that bad. Though maybe it’s because you have something to talk about, and it has nothing to do with Bellamy. Still, as soon as you get the plan from Echo, you both exchange goodbyes and you run back to your tent to tell your boyfriend the good news. As soon as he knows, you both go to Indra next, as usual, and tell her the plan. Once she knows, you look at Bellamy, both of you aware of what you have to do next, and he nods, looking reluctant.

You both walk to Octavia’s tent, and the closer you get, the louder her voice grows. You can tell she’s having a strategy meeting with her advisors, one that does not include an encouraging plan. “We're gonna take heavy fire, but as long as we stay together, we can still do this. Does everybody understand?”

You and Bellamy are both stopped at the door by the guards, and Bellamy demands, “We need to see her now.”

Octavia’s voice comes from inside the tent, granting you both permission. “Let them in!”

As soon as you step inside, you scan the room, looking at the advisors, before your eyes fall to the map on the table in front of Octavia. “You don't need that.”

“The spy found us a way in?”

“Yes.” Bellamy turns to look at the advisors gathered around. “Everybody out.”

They stand frozen in place until Octavia dismisses them, and then they all exit quickly, leaving the three of you alone. Bellamy walks closer to his sister, and you hang back, sensing that he has something he wants to say to her. “Before I tell you this, we need to set some things straight.”

“I'm listening.”

“This war that you're so anxious for is about to be fought on the last survivable land on Earth. That is monumentally stupid. But it's here, and in four days, when we march on that valley, we are gonna fight this the right way.”

“Does the right way end up with us winning?”

Bellamy shakes his head, annoyed that winning is all she cares about. “It ends with us accepting the other side's surrender. Once they lay down their arms, we share the valley with them. No executions. No fighting pits. Real peace.”

“I accept your terms. Now, tell me how to win this war.”

Bellamy steps away, already done with the conversation. “Indra has the details.”

She calls out to his retreating figure, “Bellamy...this is how it was meant to be. You and me. Fighting side by side.”

Bellamy stops beside you, both of you now standing near the exit of the tent, and he reaches out for your hand before turning to face Octavia. “I'm not fighting for you. I’m fighting for la lune, who you were willing to kill a few days ago. I'm fighting to get back the rest of my family, and I'm fighting so that we can finally build a future here.”

You see a look of hurt pass over Octavia’s face as she realizes he doesn't consider her part of his family, but if he sees it, he ignores it. He just turns back to you and walks out of the tent, guiding you along after him.

The next three days of marching are almost continuous, as Octavia decides against stopping to camp 3 nights in a row. Instead, you stop for an hour or so twice a day before continuing the march to the valley. Finally, on day 6, you arrive at the final camping spot, just outside of the valley. You all pitch your tents during the day and spend most of it resting, because as soon as the next day dawns, the war begins.

You and Bellamy crawl out of your tent sometime after nightfall, finally rested after so many days of marching, and you both sit around a small fire and talk, keeping yourselves distracted from your nerves, the way you used to before he went to space without you. Monty comes over as you chat, sitting down on your other side, splitting his rations into three. “Last of the rations.”

You and Bellamy accept his offer with a nod of thanks, and as you all savor the last bit of food you have, Monty turns to look between you and Bellamy. “Look, if you want us with you at the front-”

Bellamy cuts him off, seeing the reluctance on his face, aware of Monty’s dislike of killing. He shakes his head and motions between himself and you. “No, we got this.”

You nod, adding, “You stay. They're leaving the tents here, and once the fight is over tomorrow, you can come and join us.”

Bellamy looks up at the stars, and then over to Monty. “I told Octavia we're taking 80 acres, on the Eastern edge of the valley. Grow something other than algae, okay?”

They look at each other for a long second before they break into smiles, and you grin at the interaction, glad to see them both happy, even if it’s just for a few minutes. Eventually, Monty leaves to go find Harper, and you and Bellamy watch the stars before he suddenly asks, “The last time we were in the desert marching to war, you said something that I never got to ask about.”

You glance away from the sky, and over to him. “What’s that?”

“You said you have a house in the valley, built for two. Did you mean for us?”

“No, I was definitely getting it ready so I could share it with some other guy.” Bellamy laughs, remembering when he asked you to move in with him, and you laugh too. “Yes, for us, if you want it. It’s the perfect size for us, slightly larger than the room we had at Arkadia. It’s got a kitchen and a bathroom, but the best part is the bedroom.”

He gives you a suggestive look. “Oh yeah? Why’s that?”

You laugh and playfully hit his arm. “Not for that reason. It has a window on the roof that opens up to the sky. During the day it lets warm sunshine in, and at night you can see the stars.”

He smiles down at you, tugging you closer to him, whispering against your lips, “It does sound perfect for us.”

He pulls you in for a kiss and you let yourself get lost in the kiss, reminding you of how wonderful it is to be wrapped up in his arms. As the two of you start to pull away, someone clears their throat, and you jump apart, slightly embarrassed. You look up to see Indra looking down at the two of you, and you swear she’s hiding a smile as she nods towards Octavia’s tent. “Last strategy meeting, and they want you both there.”

You stand and follow her to the tent, the last three to arrive, gathering around the table that features the new map, drawn for your plan. Octavia looks at Bellamy, nodding at him to begin. “At dawn, our group in the woods will open fire on pillbox one, in position A here. At the first sign of attack, McCreary's forces at point B and C will converge to reinforce A, thinking that's where we're coming through.”

Octavia muses, “Leaving the other two doors wide open.”

Bellamy glances at you, and you finish the plan, pointing down at the map. “We'll come through here, point C. Now, if we time it right and we move fast, there won't be any resistance.”

Indra mutters, “Once we're in the woods, we take the village.”

Miller finishes, “Once we're in the woods, we win.”

All of you look up and around at each other, making sure everyone understands, and Brell is the first to nod. “Okay, I'll tell my people.”

Miller turns on her, growling, “Your people?”

Indra breaks up the argument and snaps, “Save it for the enemy. Spread the word, we go at first light.”

Everyone starts to dissipate, and Octavia turns her attention to you and Bellamy. “Tell Echo I said well done.”

“You can tell her yourself in two hours.” Bellamy grabs your hand and leads you from the tent, eager to end any conversation with his sister. The two of you head back outside and over to your fire, deciding to spend your last few hours before the war together, enjoying each other’s company. Though your victory seems imminent, you never know what will happen in war. The tides can change at any second, and you could lose, people could die. Which is why you and Bellamy stay huddled together, making sure each of you know just how much you love each other.

Just in case.

next chapter

#the 100 #the 100 rewrite #bellamy blake #bellamy blake x reader #bellamy blake fanfiction

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huearmy · 4 years

Text

Alley Cat.

Summary: You have been living in the streets since always, poor and free cat. Namjoon is a house dog who call his owners Mom and Dad. And you two love each other in all the purest and sincere love. You just believe he is the best thing ever happened to you, and all he dreams of is to protect you from the terrible things the stray life can bring. The solutions, for him, is obvious: you join his family.

Pairing: dog!Namjoon x cat!Reader

Genre: FLUFF, angst ops I did it again

Words: 11k +.

Rating: PG-13

Warnings: None I think.

Your hips sway from side to side, your long, fluffy tail is up, and your smart ears are moving in all directions, showing how alert you are as you tiptoe through the crowd on the wide sidewalk of the busy street. Nobody really stops to look at you, nobody pays attention to stray hybrids. But you pay attention to everyone. And in semi-open bags, watches and jewelry on display and wallets in the back pockets, which with light hands you sneak up on without being noticed. You are very good at this, it is your way to survive. And whenever is necessary you even find your way to return the documents that come with the wallets and purses, because you are not a bad kitty.

Feeling the pockets of your hoodie heavier than before, satisfied, you walked away from the hustle and bustle, to less busy streets, until you reached an empty alley, behind a restaurant. Between two large garbage cans you sat huddled, so that no one would see you, taking the necessary care not to touch anything dirty or stinky, your nose already wrinkling with distaste for the smell of the place. You emptied your pockets to count your spoils. It was not a very good day, you stole several wallets, but few with a lot of money, in fact one literally only had the documents and some coupons and the subway pass - these things are useful, but you can't survive the whole week with just it. Besides, you took an expensive looking watch of a guy in a suit, and a big ring that you got from a lady who was walking her dog, these things you would change later when you return to the homeless camp.

With a sigh you stood up looking around, put the wallets, now empty of every item of value, in a plastic bag. Time to go to the subway to use your new pass and put the plastic bag wallets in the lost and found. In the bathroom of the station, in front of the mirror, you opened your personal bag - which you also got in suspiciously ways, as well as basically everything inside it - to get a hair comb and your toothbrush. You brushed the fur of your tail and ears until no strand is out of place, and even without toothpaste you brushed your teeth to make your sharp fangs shine. As a last detail, with a fingertip you applied a little strawberry lip balm. Naturally beautiful, you looked in the mirror feeling lovely. A fifteen-minute train ride and a short walk later, you were in another alley, climbing the external emergency stairs of a building that cats like you dream of living in, stopping outside the window of a apartment on the seventh-floor. With the tip of your nail you lightly tapped on the window glass and waited. Only someone with good hearing would hear, so there was no danger that a human would come to you, yet you hid near the wall until you heard familiar footsteps coming towards you, and the window opened for Namjoon's handsome face to appear to you. "You are early." He smiled at you, adorable dimples showing up, making your stomach full of butterflies.

You stepped close to him, as he got out the window to get close to you too. "I just wanted to see you. I had nothing else to do anyway..." You shrugged and hugged his torso with your arms, bringing him to you even more.

Namjoon's smile widened as he took your face between his hands and kissed you. You could feel his tail happily wagging behind him, making you laugh against his lips.

"I'm glad you came earlier, I can spend more time with you." He pulled just enough to speak, your noses touching. "Are you hungry?"

"I'm always hungry." You shamelessly looked at him with doe eyes. You are always hungry indeed, your stomach always making weird noises, sometimes hurting for being empty for too many days.

"I will feed you, then." He pecked your lips a couple of times more. "Want to get in?"

You shook your head negatively. You never enter his apartment. You prefer not to invade that much.

"Thanks, Joon." You let go of him.

He smiles at you again before entering through the window, disappearing on the corner of the corridor, which is the only part of the apartment you had ever seen. It's been almost six months since you and Namjoon started dating. You two met in very specific and unconventional circumstances, where you basically stole his owner's wallet while the two of them shopped at a street fair, and well he saw you doing it, and even if you were fast on disappearing through people, he tracked you with his dog nose. When you thought you were safe enough to check the wallets you had stolen, hidden in an alley - as usual - he took you by surprise, holding your wrist with a hard look on your face. You didn't try to fight, you just cringed. He was so much bigger than you and he looked so angry... You had been beaten by dogs before, and this is an experience you try to avoid. Seeing you so scared tightened Namjoon's heart, his intention was just to retrieve his owner's wallet so she could pay for the veggies, not to scare you, so he politely asked for it, letting go of your wrist.

He had seen you before that encounter, through the window, in the alley next to the building he lives in, on the streets when he goes out for a walk or to do chores for his owners, like putting out the trash or buying something at the market for breakfast. He had noticed you more than once. So the next time he saw you after that, he called you to talk, and already feeling attracted to him, you obliged, and since then you are very good friends, which soon became something else. You have come to learn that his owner, an old lady he calls Mom, goes out three times a week at the same time, and it is on these days that you come to see him. You took a sit by the stairs, resting your head on the wall, feeling tired, it's been days since you could sleep properly, and exactly three days since your last fool meal - which was the last day you've been with Namjoon. To say the truth, you weren't feeling just tired, you were weak... sick even. But you pushed the thought about it to the back of your mind and smiled when Namjoon came back through the window with pots of warm food and a bottle of soda. Your stomach made a twist in happiness.

"Mom made pasta yesterday and I saved some for you... In this one we have steak and onion rings." He seated beside you, handing you cutlery, and placing one of the pots, the one with pastai, open on your lap. "I also got a chocolate bar for taking care of the neighbor's baby on saturday, and saved it to share with you."

"Ownnn." You coed, placing a sweet kiss on his cheek. "You are so sweet, thank you. Since when you babysit?"

A blush spread his cheeks and his tail started to wag again.

"It was the first time, actually. It was kind of scary, taking care of something so small and fragile... and cute. I like babies so much." He looked so happy. You were happy. You two spent hours outside his window, talking, sunbathing, napping, reading... You are not illiterate, but you are not very good at reading, having few opportunities to do that in your life, so Namjoon teaches and helps you whenever you feel like it, if not, you lie with your head on his chest or on his lap to hear him read to you, in his calm voice. Often you fall asleep, like that, outdoors, on blankets and pillows that he brought so you could be more comfortable, the sun warming your legs, your stomach full, and the guy who moves your world taking care of you.

You sleep better in this little time than in your bed at night, alone. You never said it out loud, but Namjoon knows. He is very good at noticing unspoken things. So when he hears your small snores, he always closes the book on his hand to look at your peaceful sleeping face and play with your hair. Even when he starts to feel uncomfortable, or if any of his arms or legs sleeps, he doesn't move, afraid to wake you up earlier than necessary, even if it lasts for hours in the same position. He wanted you to accept to come in, he wanted you to lie and cuddle with him in his bed, where is more comfortable and has more space... He wanted your scent to stay on his pillow so when he remember of you at night he would miss you a little bit less... He really wanted you could live with him. He was thinking exactly about it now, holding you as you sat on his lap, head against his shoulder, face hiding on his neck. By your breathing he could say you were sleeping, even if you were holding him back tightly, almost as if you were afraid he wouldn't be there when you wake up.

A loud honk on the street made you jump awake, startled and looking around, looking for a possible threat.

"Shhh. It's ok. It was just a truck in the street." He rubbed a reassuring hand on your back, bringing you to his chest again as you relaxed.

"Did I fall asleep again?" You whined. "For how long?"

"I don't know... One hour or so." He kissed your temple.

"Oh, noooo." You whined louder, the biggest pout in your lips. "Sorry. I didn't mean to... I wanted to be awake to enjoy my time with you..."

"Don't worry, it's adorable. You look tired anyways..." He was trying to make you cortable again so you could go back to sleep.

You rubbed your eyes cutely and put your hair behind your ears.

"No, no... I'm okay." You mumbled. "Soon your mom will be back, and it's safer to go home before it gets dark... I don't wanna miss a second of you."

Namjoon is the best thing you have, and it's not just because you don't have much in life, it's because he is the person who most cared and loved you in life, You can't even remember the last time you felt so safe before you met him, or the last person who hugged you like he does. You may never have felt these things before him. In the homeless camp, everyone helps, protects and cares for each other, but it is more out of necessity than love. There is nothing you can give Namjoon that he doesn’t already have, he doesn’t need you and yet he’s so loving and kind. And that's why you miss him even sleeping, even dreaming about him, because dreams are nothing compared to him in real life... And even if you know that your love will end someday... Even if you live anxious and scared thinking that the next day could be the last with him... You are an alley cat, and alley cats never have a happy ending. You can die at any time on the streets, in many different ways. And even if you have a long life, one day his owners can find out about you and forbid him to see you, or he can get tired of you or fall in love with someone like him... With pedigree and owners who take care of them. When any of these things happen you will be prepared, but until then you want to spend as much time with Namjoon, in his gentle embrace, feeling desired like never before. You snuggled on him and he sighed, kissing your face over and over, making you giggle.

He knows you are lying when you say you are ok. He is intelligent, and reads a lot about a lot of things, besides, once again, he is very good at noticing unspoken things. He knows you are not that healthy, that you are always anxious, and that both things have been getting worse in the last few weeks. He wants to protect and care for you, but he can't. He can only guarantee that you have at least one decent meal three times a week, and when you are away anything can happen to you and he cannot do anything to stop it. Namjoon really wanted it so much that you could live with him...

"Y/N?" He cupped your face with one of his hands, the other still holding you close.

"Hmmm?" You purred with closed eyes, head leaning towards his hand.

"Did you think about that conversation of ours?" His voice was deep and wary, his hand on your back tracing circles to keep you relaxed.

"What conversation?" Your lips reached his hand, to kiss his palm gently.

His breath got stuck on his throat at the sign, but he continued.

"That one about you coming to live with me..." He almost whispered, the last time you talked about it you got really excited, and he didn't want it to happen again.

Your stomach felt heavy as if you had eaten bricks, and your heart squeezed in pain. You opened your eyes slowly, without making eye contact with Namjoon, however much he was looking for it. Your purring was gone. "Oh... This conversation..." You gulped, voice tight. "Not really... I said it already, Joon. I'm an alley cat, I'm where I belong, and your owners won't like me anyways."

You forced a smile at the end of the sentence, as if it wasn't a big deal, still not looking at him in the eyes.

"And I said I disagree. You belong where you want to be. Where you are safe and loved. And this place is with me..." He inquired, tooking your face with both hands now, kissing you softly. "Right? Don't you want to be with me?"

You nodded in silence, staring at his lips, and then tightly squeezed your eyes shut.

"Good. Because I want so bad to be with you too." He was decisive as he stated. "Besides, there's no way mom and dad won't like you... You are cute, kind, sweet, smart, intelligent, and most importantly, I like you sooo much..." With each adjective he gave you a peck on the lips, and ended with a real kiss, making you melt. But it didn't last long, not as much you would like, because he had more to say to you. "You will eat well everyday, we will sleep together, we will never have to worry about the time passing and you will having to leave, nor will you need to steal or use public restrooms. Never again. You will be mine twenty-four hours a day and I will be able to protect you..." He bombarded you with pleas, each filled with tenderness.

"Namjoon..." You whispered.

"Y/N, please..." He begged.

"Namjoon... I..."

"I already talked with my mom." He stated.

You finally looked at his eyes, shock overtaking your face.

"What?" Your voice was small and expectant.

His mouth curved in a reassuring and bright smile.

"I told mom about a friend I made. A very special friend. We talked about you more than once or twice, actually. She already loves you, Y/N." His heart tightened as he saw your eyes getting wet. "She told me to invite you to dinner on friday. She will make you lasagna."

"Why would she do that?" You were incredulous.

"Cus I asked her to." He caught with his thumb a tear rolling on your cheek. "She wants to meet you, Y;N. And when that happens I know that she will fall in love with you to the point that she'll want to adopt you... I won't even have to ask. The same goes for my father."

You searched for lies in his eyes, but you only found certain. Namjoon really believed in each word he said. It didn't calm you at all.

"I'm afraid, Namjoon" You admitted, and even if you didn't, he would know. ________________________________________________________________

The homeless camp used to be in an abandoned building, and probably with a condemned structure in the poorest part of the city... Now it is under a bridge a few kilometers away, because the police arrived expelling everyone, seizing goods, destroying improvised rooms, and arresting anyone who resisted a few months ago. Now you guys have more space than before, but raining on your head is more likely - which is very bad today, because looking at dark clouds forming in the sky, the smell of ozone that precedes storms entering your sensitive nose, you already know that the night will be long and scary. It makes no difference here whether it’s human or hybrid, everyone’s in the same shit. You walked through recyclable shacks and old tents, groups of strays, thieves like you, and beggars, garbage collectors, and some drug addicts - those you usually avoid - looking for a specific shack. At that time the line for exchanges is longer, but you are one of the favorites, so to the displeasure of many, you totally ignored everyone who arrived before you and entered the improvised door with a crochet curtain. "Ah, Y/N..." A pretty woman sitting behind her desk - wood boxes - smirked to you. The other two exchange dealers greeted you as well. "Right on time as usual... What do you have for me today?"

"Not much. I hope it is of value." You drop the ring and the watch in front of her.

"No phones today?"She raised an eyebrow to you.

"Nope, it wasn't a good day for busyness."

She sighed.

"It never is when you go to see your rich boy." She dryly said. "He is no good to you, Y/N. Not only because he takes your focus from work, but because hybrids created with the best never understand what life is like for strays... He will hurt you at some point."

She really looked concerned, and talked low so the other people around won't mind what is not their business. Yet you got slightly annoyed.

"You can't know. You are not a hybrid."

She smiled sympathetically.

"No. But I'm a stray. Have always been."

With a pair of gloves and a magnifying glass she studied both items you bought in silence for a moment. You were happy she turned her attention to another direction than your personal life. Then after a whole minute she got up. "Come with me."

You followed her to the back, into an old car - where things of value are kept. Most people in the camp don't even know about this car, hidden by old wooden walls and cardboard, but again, you're a favorite. "Ok. The watch is not a big deal." She said already counting the money to pay you. "I can give you this much and a new pair of shoes I got of your size. New pair of shoes."

You smiled, eyes sparkling with feline pupils going round, your tail moving side to side in interest. The only pair of tennis you have are cheap, beaten up, and with holes on the heels. A new pair is nice, especially if it isn't bigger or smaller than your feet. And you could look better on friday's dinner... You stopped the thought midway. You didn't decide to go yet, it was still making you anxious and freaking out... Besides, what good would new shoes do if all your five clothes are old?

"And what about the ring? It looks expensive." You asked with big eyes.

"It can be." She was examining the ring with a smaller, thicker lens now. "It's old. it has a date and a name written on the inside... And the stone doesn't look fake. I'll have to take it to a pawn shop to be sure of the value, and to be able to pay you. Can you wait a few days?"

"Sure. My shoes?"

You have your own little home, an old camping tent that you fixed in improvisation, inside all you have is a blanket and cardboards that prevent you from sleeping directly on the cold floor, a backpack where you keep your clothes - your personal items and money is always with you - a book Namjoon lent you and some silly magazines, and an ugly Christmas ornament that shines with battery, which you use to have some light at night. The dark scares you. Kneeling in the small space you took your hoodie, t-shirt and bra, instantly feeling more comfortable, from inside the backpack you took a clean t-shirt and put it on after applying deodorant, you also changed your jeans for a pair of jogger shorts, and vented the hoodie again, already feeling the cold air of the rain that was about to fall. Both the t-shirt and the jeans needed to be washed, as well as most of your underwear, so you've already set aside the right money to pay a visit to the laundry the next day. It made you sigh in regret. You shouldn't have come home.Ttwenty-four hours laundries are heated and much better to protect yourself from storms, bsides having bathrooms that you can use to wash yourself, you should have gone there with your clothes to wash it and to sleep where it is safe. Thinking if it would not be a good idea to follow through with this plan, you stuck your head out of the tent, and it was at that moment that the first thunder broke out, making you practically throw yourself back inside feeling your heart beat fast in the throat. With shaking hands, you zipped up the tent and wrapped yourself in the blanket as best you could, determined to sleep before the storm got too loud. It didn't work.

Hours later you were still in the same position, shivering with cold and fear, silent tears streaming down your tightly closed eyes. With every thunder, your heart felt like it was going to leap out of your chest, in addition to the violent sound of rain and wind that terrifies you, you almost couldn't breathe anymore. Even with your ears close to your head you could hear other guys from the camp laughing and talking loudly, somewhere drier under the bridge, probably sharing a drink around a fire to keep warm... If you weren't so afraid you would join them, but you couldn't move, paralyzed in a fetal position. At some point, you wouldn't be able to say how long after, you caught something in their conversation that caught your attention.

"Are you lost?" One guy said.

"You clearly don't belong here, dude. What do you want?" Another one shouted, so you understood better. You didn't hear the answer, whoever they were talking to, that someone should speak in a much calmer tone, or frightened, since the camp guys can be quite intimidating when in group.

"I don't know who you are talking about, and I don't like trust fund dogs like you snooping around our territory... " The second guy threatened even more loudly, I clearly growl following the words.

"You should go home, dude." Another one talked.

Growls and altered voices indicated that they were surrounding the guy, maybe it would end up in a fight, and just by thinking about you tightened the blanket in your hands, bringing it closer to your frightened chest. Violence was the last thing you needed now.

"Wait! Stop you guys." You heard the first voice, he sounded way nicer, so you didn't understand him as well. "Can you describe again? I can help you to find." The turmoil passed, so your fear that the argument would turn into a fight too, but then again, you had nothing else to focus on other than the storm outside. A thunder louder than the others made you whimper and cringe even more. You just wanted to sleep so that it would end soon. To make matters worse your horrible Christmas ornament started to flash until it went off, the batteries ran out, and you were now in complete darkness and on the verge of a panic attack. Every cell in your body screamed that you were going to die, totally irrational, but nothing in the world would save you from that horrible feeling right now.

"I think this is her tent, but I personally don't know her, so I can be wrong." That nice guy talked just outside you little home. "Is this Y/N? Are you home?" You wanted to answer. This was your chance not to be alone with your fears and get help. But you couldn't put enough attention to it, the chest pain and difficulty breathing were the only thing you could think of. The only sound coming out of your mouth was the mixture of whimpers of pain and hyperventilation, and you doubted that with the noise outside he could hear it.

"Sorry, dude. I think is not here..." The guy started and just now you understood that he was talking to someone else.

You were confused, with difficulty thinking, and was even more confused when she heard a familiar voice, very close to the door.

"Y/N?" More tears are streaming down his face in relief. You didn't know if you were dreaming or hallucinating, but it didn't matter. Even if weakly, you regained the ability to speak.

"Namjoon??" You sobbed.

The answer came almost instantly, in a worried tone.

"It's me, princess, can I come in?"

"Please.." Namjoon never heard your voice so small and fragile before. He knew you were afraid of storms, he was restless at home, pacing the room, thinking about you alone in the worst rain of the year, so as soon as mom and dad went to sleep, he packed a backpack and went out by the emergency stairs. More than once you talked about where the camp was, he knew exactly where it was, even though you never let him visit you before. But he didn't expect to see you like this. After thanking the hybrid who helped him find you, he unzipped the tent to find you in the shape of a frightened ball, huddled in the corner of the tent. You were shaking so much. He took the backpack off his back and went in the tent, zipping it to stop the wind, and then kneeling right next to you. Your eyes were closed, you wanted to look to see if it was really him, but the fear of opening your eyes and seeing only darkness hold you back.

Namjoon was prepared for that. From the backpack he pulled out an emergency light that brought clarity to the small space, and that alone was enough to calm you down a little, in the next instant you felt another blanket being placed on you, a warm blanket with the smell of Namjoon, and this is almost the definition of heaven for you. A hand brushed the hair off your face and massaged your scalp. You finally looked at him, eyes bloodshot from crying. "Princess, can I lie down with you, can I hold you?" He asked for permission, words full of love and care.

"Please." You nodded eagerly.

Namjoon got beneath the blanket and brought you close to his chest, letting you bury your face in the crook of his neck.

"I.. c-can't breath... Namjoon..." You whined. Still feeling like you would die.

"Shhh, loosen your fists... Here, let's hold hands, okay? Try to breathe with me. I'm here to protect you." He kissed your forehead, managing to hold your hand without undoing the embrace around you.

Several minutes passed away until you started to feel better, and your body let the tension go, and you managed to hug him back. You were damn tired and sleepy now. "Thank you." You whispered, kissing his chest.

Namjoon wanted to say to you to not thank him, because everything he wants is to keep you safe, that he wouldn't sleep while thinking if you were ok or not. Instead he just kissed your temple, then the tip of your nose, then the corner of your lips, then your whole face.

"I love you." He lifted your chin to look at him. "You are everything to me."

You wanted to cry again, a huge mix of feelings overflowing you. Your hold on him tightened and you kissed him exactly the way he did to you, not missing one spot, but ended it with a solid kiss on his lips, noses and foreheads connected as well.

"I love you too. You are the most precious thing I have." You smiled, but still there were tears on the corner of your eyes. "And it scares the hell out of me."

He laughed.

"I know. It scares the hell of me too." He closed his eyes and sighed. "I've never slept on the floor in my life, and it's pretty uncomfortable. But I would only go back to my bed tonight if you were with me."

Having Namjoon to hold you the whole night in a comfy and warm bed really sounds good. But you didn't voice it out.

"Ah." Namjoon spok suddenly. "I brought food too... If you want..."

"No." You held him tighter, before he could manage to let you go. "Stay here. Cuddle me. I just want it." The rain and wind still howled outside, periodically thunders broke out frighteningly. But Namjoon's presence, protecting you from these things really made you forget, minutes later, with his hands massaging your hair and the base of your ears, you fell asleep, and had the best night's sleep of your life. ________________________________________________________________

Next morning you were still cuddling, Namjoon spooning you, you using his arms as a pillow, legs entangled, holding hands. When you opened your eyes it wasn't raining anymore and the emergence light was off, which isn't a problem now that the daylight has come.

You can feel Namjoon's breath against the back of your neck as you came out of your slumber, and as he, who was already awake for a while now, noticed you were waking up, he started to lightly kiss your nape and shoulders, tickling you and spreading goosebumps across your skin. Even still sleepy, you laughed in your rusky morning voice.

"Good morning, princess" His morning voice was also attractive. He pulled you closer to his chest, still kissing you and making you giggle. "Did you sleep well?"

"Hmmm... So warm..." You turned to him and hid your face between him and the blanket. "I could sleep here forever..."

"Then go back to sleep."

Waking up for real and wanting to get up and get on with your day seemed the most difficult thing at that moment. Your eyes were heavy and you were soooo warm and cozy, all your worries were miles away from you now, and namjoons smell is always so good and calming... Before you finally returned to unconsciousness, a thought crossed your mind making your eyes open wide, almost on alert. "What time is it? Your mom and dad know you are here, won't they be mad at you for not sleeping at home?" You freaked out.

With eyes closed and a relaxed face, Namjoon just smiled.

"Don't worry, love. I texted my mom telling her I went for a walk, I do it a lot so she won't think much of it." He pressed a kiss on your forehead, lazily talking against your skin. "Besides it's early, they are still sleeping..."

"Hmmm. Ok, then." You purred.

Namjoon loves when you purr, is the cutest thing ever, and the vibration on your chest against his makes him happy. He couldn't hold himself and wag his tail as well. You love when Namjoon wags his tail, is the cutest thing ever. Suddenly both of you were laughing at each other's cuteness, your sleepyheads gradually waking up.Then your stomach made a weird sound making it impossible to try to stay in bed.

"Sorry, I'm hungry."

Namjoon seated up and he stretched, feeling the impact of sleeping on the hard floor, pillowless, for the first time in his life. He was adopted at a very young age, as a toddler, by a couple who could not have children and always had the good and the best, he had the luck that most hybrids do not.

"Your neck hurt?" You asked, already massaging it for him.

"A little, but it's' nothing. Thank you." He reached his backpack, picking a thermos and mugs, as well as a can with sandwiches and a packet of cookies. "Breakfast."

Your eyes sparkled with enthusiasm, you usually don't eat in the morning, so just the image of sandwiches made your heart beat faster.

"Oh my god I love you." You picked one and stuck it whole in your mouth, feeling blessed. When Namjoon served you a mug of hot chocolate you ended up in cloud nine. "My god, I love you even more."

In order not to lose contact with his heat, you laid your head on his shoulder to eat in silence, just taking advantage of his presence. He put his arm around your shoulder and brought you closer, as he did the same. You could really get used to waking up next to Namjoon every day, having breakfast every day... Having breakfast with Namjoon every day. "Is there any bathroom around here I can use?" He asked when you were with full bellies.

"Not really. We have chemical toilets near the exchanges but they are always being used and smelly. Usually I go to the subway or some restaurant... I have to do laundry today, we can go there, the soap smells good." You answered calmly, as if not having access to basic hygiene was not subsistence.

"Then let's go." Namjoon tried to fix your messy morning hair.

Your eyes got wide, and then you hid your face in your hands.

"Aaaaaaah..." You whined, murmuring things that Namjoon couldn't understand.

"What was that, love?" He laughed.

"You are not just seeing my morning face, I must also be all swollen from crying my eyes out... My eyes must look like two buns." You voiced your mental breakdown making Namjoon laugh again.

"It's okay, princess, you had a hard night, besides..." He took your wrists in his hands, trying to uncover your face. "Your morning face is the cutest. You are always beautiful."

You looked at him between your fingers.

"But my eyes look like two buns, right?"

"Yeah." Namjoon confirmed and you whined again, pouting hard. "But I can borrow you my sunglasses when we go out, so only I'll see your beautiful bun eyes."

"Thank you, Joonie."

You got everything you would need - basically everything you have - and got out the tent hand in hand, backpacks on. The camp was awake in it's routine. As you walked down the way out of it a group of kids ran in your direction.

"Y/N!!" They sang and called. The smallest boy, a cat like you, stood out from the group and threw himself into your arms, asking to be held. "Hello, Y/N. Who is this?"

All the kids looked at Namjoon with doe eyes, curious with your answer.

"This is my boyfriend, Namjoon."

All kids coed by it, asking things to him, and inviting him to play, as much they were demanding you to.

"This is my gang." You told him with a smile and then turned your attention to the little strays. "I can't play today, bubbles. I have to..."

Before you could continue, all of them started to complain and argue why you had to play. You looked lost, because you really like to spend time with the littles and are horrible at saying no to them. Namjoon saw the need to save you.

"Sorry kids, she is all mine today... But what do you think about cookies?" He took the package out of his backpack, which you two barely ate, and the kids had their eyes shining just like you minutes before.

"Thank you." The older girl of the group took the package to distribute among them.

You put the little boy down and entangled your fingers with Namjoon again.

"Bye bye, kids."

"Bye Y/N!"

Until leaving the camp you greeted a few more people here and there, receiving several smiles and 'good morning', in addition to curious looks and several comments about your boyfriend. Namjoon noted that you seemed to know everyone by name, and that everyone knew you too. The group of children followed the two of you at a distance, perhaps hoping you would change your mind and decide to play with them, or to gain something else. "These people like you." Namjoon said, after you two got out and moved away enough that no one would listen to you. "But it isn't a surprise at all, you are special."

Your face heated up.

"What do you mean by special?"

"It's easy to fall in love with you." He simply said, looking at you as if it was the most obvious truth in the word.

Your stomach made a twist. You don't feel like it, looking through your past and all the times you had love denied to you, or when everything you got from others was hate and contempt. If you were that lovable you wouldn't live in the streets. Part of your resistance to meeting Namjoon's parents is precisely because of this, fear of rejection.

Namjoon noticed your change of humor, and didn't need you to explain yourself to understand what was passing through your mind. He just kept talking.

"Those little guys seemed to be crazy about you, I bet they would be upset if you came to live with me... I know that I've had to deal with jealousy the way people look at you when you're being adorable more than once."

"What are you talking about?"

"An example... The times we went to that bakery, the owner adores you, and you know, she praises you until you're embarrassed, and the cashier is always staring at you and that makes me uncomfortable cuz I know he thinks you are beautiful."

You sighed.

"She always gives me snacks when I pass by." You were already seeing the laundry shop. "I know what's your point, Namjoon... I'll go."

"Will you...?" He looked confused.

"I'm going to that dinner... on friday."

Namjoon gave you the smile that made you want to make all his wishes real. ________________________________________________________________

Friday came faster than you expected. And you're much less anxious than you thought you would be - but of course, that doesn't mean you're calm. After getting your money for the ring you stole at the beginning of the week, you broke into the locker room of a public pool - hybrids not allowed - and took a long shower, and now at the mall you were looking at cute hairpieces. Would it be too much? You already have a new pair of shoes but you wanted to look presentable and adoptable. You wanted to look good. Usually you only think about surviving and that doesn't include good clothing, but today is a different occasion, it is a special day. You bought a satin ribbon for your hair.

Walking around the mall, nobody paid much attention to you, as usual, from time to time you had to avoid going through a security guard, so as not to be questioned for being without your owner around, but other than that, it was being a peaceful walk. Until you saw exactly what you were looking for. You don't even remember the last time you wore a dress, maybe never, but they are perfect for meeting someone formally, right? If the idea is to make a good first impression... After looking at the dress through the store window for a few seconds and made the decision to enter. You went straight for it, holding your breath until you saw the price and made sure you could buy it. You took one out of the rack as you found one that would suit you. "Excuse me, can I help you?"

You were almost startled when the attendant appeared at your side, too distracted to imagine yourself wearing the dress to pay attention to your surroundings. "Ah... Hello." You smiled, holding tighter to the dress. "I want to buy this." She smiled politely, looking around.

"Of course. Where is your owner?"

You have been through this situation so many times that the answer came out of your mouth naturally. "At the shoe store next door, they said I could come first and buy this dress..." You smiled widely as if you really have a loving owner waiting for you to come back with your new dress.

"Oh, I see." Her smile faltered a little. "So we need to wait for your owner to come here. We don't sell to unaccompanied hybrids."

You mentally cursed.

"I got it..." You tried to look terribly upset to soften her heart. "But I have the money with me, it would be easier if you just let me pay already... right?"

She sighed and took the dress from your hand and put it back in the rack.

"We only sell to hybrids accompanied by tutors. No owner, no dress. Please leave." She turned her back on you.

"Wait!" You followed her. "I need this dress to get an owner. I really have the money..."

"I said no. Leave before I call the security."

You obeyed, stepping out of the store with a bitter taste in your mouth and an urge to cry. You weren't as nervous as you thought you would be, but that situation was enough to trigger all the fears in you to manifest. More than once you have been humiliated and treated like an animal for not having a human to have you, but today is the first time you want one, that you have the possibility to change things. This is the last time you let them be unfair to you... Being more discreet as you are used to being, you entered the store again, right after another customer, taking advantage of the fact that the customer was distracting the attendant, kept down until you were close enough to get the dress. Without worrying about change, you left the money on the counter and headed for the exit again. It's just that you're not used to robbing stores - not that you're robbing now, technically you paid - so you didn't remember about the alarm... As soon as you walked through the door, the deafening noise sounded... And you ran. Without thinking too much, even running, you started to put the dress, over your shirt and shorts, so that no one could take it from you. You heard the store clerk yelling for security. "Give that dress back now! Somebody stop that cat!" "I paid for it!" You shouted back. The new shoes were not very good for running. In the next second, a security guard held you by the arm, to immobilize you, you could hear the commotion of people around you, and footsteps of other security officers approaching. "Let go of me, I paid!" You didn't think much about it, you just moved your free hand. The security guard shouted along with the movement, you scratched him right in the face, and he released you. You ran again. Seeing the exit you saw the chance to escape right in front of you, when you mingled with the people on the street nobody could catch you, you would disappear, and everything would be fine... Almost there. Then something wrapped around your neck and you fell back just for another guard came to restrain you. ________________________________________________________________

Namjoon was sitting on the emergency stairs. It's been an hour since you should have arrived for dinner. He's worried, because you're not a late person, but maybe you changed your mind at the last minute... maybe he asked too much when he invited you to meet his parents promising a home that he wasn't even sure he could give you... You don't even have a cell phone to tell him about it or for him to call you to find out how you are... Should he go after you?

"Namjoon? Your food is cold, you should come in and eat..." His mom appeared on the window. She had a comprehensive look on her face, the kind that mothers use when they want to cheer their children up. "Come on, I'll warm you up a plate."

"Thank you mom. But I lost my appetite... I'll wait a little longer." "Ok, my love. We'll be waiting for you..."

His mom had made for dinner everything he asked and prepared a bed in the guest room so you don't have to come home late, his dad opened a bottle of wine and set the table with cute candles. They were waiting for you too.

"What do I do?" He whispered to himself. Maybe he should just get in, eat and then wash the dishes, apologize with mom and dad for making them prepare the whole dinner night, and go to bed... He would see you again on monday, so you both would talk about it, things would be ok then... Still he couldn't stop thinking about checking you up right now, he already knows where you reside...

He heard a whistle.

A few flights down the stairs, in the dark, he could see a group of people... children... The kids of the camp, looking at him with hybrid eyes shining in the dark. "Hello?" Namjoon carefully called.

The older girl from before stepped forward into the light of a window to be seen, but didn't get closer than that. She spoke in a low voice.

"Y/N is in trouble... She got arrested."

Namjoon's heart dropped.

"What?"

"She must be transferred to a shelter till the end of the night..." The girl continued, voice worried. "They might put her down because she scratched someone... Please help her."

Namjoon hardly heard the last part. He didn't need to know the context, or how rumors of you being arrested spread among the homeless until it reached him, or if he could do anything to really help you... He just wanted to reach you and that's it. He ran inside with teary eyes and struggling to speak, looking for the people who could do something in a situation like this.

"Mom! Dad!"

Hearing the despair in Namjoon's voice, his father was the first to meet him in the hall, holding him by the shoulders. Namjoon is not one for crying, so it must be serious. "Son, what's the matter?"

"Y/N... got arrested. I don't know why, but we need to help. Dad, you need to help."

"What's happening?" His mom got out of the bathroom looking all worried.

Before Namjoon could explain again, his dad answered.

"Honey, pick my keys and wallet, please. We need to go pick Namjoon's girl."

"Pick her? Where?" Even without understanding and questioning it, his mom got the keys and wallet, as his dad got to put his shoes on.

"At the hybrid specialized police station." He answered.

Namjoon was putting his shoes and jacket on too, remembering to pick a coat for you as well, not knowing if you were wearing a hoodie or not and the night was chilly.

"Jesus! I'll go too!" His mom ran to pick her stuff. "The night will be long in a way that is not what I was imagining when you opened that bottle of wine, dear..."

The three of them left the apartment and headed to the elevator. Namjoon was shaking on his spot just by thinking about how you are right now, what you are feeling, if you were okay or if you were being treated well. He couldn't bear the thought of you being put down just for scratching someone, he knows you are not violent, if you did such a thing is because you needed to... He just pushed that thought to the back of his mind. His father put a hand on his shoulder, almost at the same time as his mother took his hand.

"It's okay son, we are going to get her. It will be okay." His dad said. "Thanks, dad. Thanks, mom." ________________________________________________________________

At the police station, the officers did not leave the three of them warming up chairs as expected, but only because Namjoon's mother is a retired detective and has arrived already showing her credentials and demanding to speak to the person responsible for your case. "The theft charge was dropped because she apparently left the money before setting off the alarm and fleeing, but the charge of aggression remains. The mall employee needed twelve stitches across the face." An officer explained to them after confirming you were there, in one of the cells. "Usually when a hybrid commits a crime, we sue the owners for negligence, almost as it does with minors, the parents are responsible for the crimes... In the case of a stray we pass it on to the hybrid control system, a shelter will take responsibility. This is what will happen to your friend, ma'am."

"And what do we need to do to take her home?" Namjoon's mom was the one talking.

"You have to ask the shelter staff. They should be coming soon, you can wait in the lobby. In any case, this is their card."

That said, the police made it clear that he had no more time to talk to them and guided them out the office door, back to the lobby, where now, they would just have to wait. Hybrids do not receive visits except from their owners, so they couldn't even see you. They had no way of letting you know that they were there for you, so you could be calm. Perhaps it was not necessary at all. Before the three had time to make themselves comfortable on the wooden bench next to the reception, a group of people in white uniforms came out of a door across the hall, a hybrid cat walking in the middle of two of them. You were still wearing your new dress, still tagged, the satin ribbon adorning your hair around your ears. You had your head down, but it could be seen that besides being handcuffed, you were wearing a collar, being pulled by one of the guys.

"Y/N!" Namjoon got up from his seat, already on the impulse to come to you. Upon hearing your name you looked up, eyes red with crying for thinking you had ruined everything, for having already accepted that an uncertain and probably horrible future was coming... But there was your hope again. You really didn't expect to see Namjoon ever again. "Namjoon!" You called with your voice breaking and your eyes filling with tears again. You tried to go towards him too, reach out to touch him, but you can barely take a step before they tug on your collar making you choke on your crying. "Hey!" Namjoon practically growled. "Joon, don't let them take me, please!" You despaired to see that the shelter staff completely ignored him, still guiding you out. "I just wanted to look pretty to your mom! I swear... Don't let them take me, Namjoon!" Seeing that you were agitated the guy pulled you harder by the collar and another one grabbed you by the arm to contain you. More heavy tears rolled down your face and you resisted, still trying to get to your boyfriend. Namjoon actually growled now, you've never seen him show his teeth to anyone. A police officer came and stood between him and the staff, a man you didn't remember seeing before called Namjoon in a warning tone and you wondered if he was his father. "Don't hurt her." Namjoon spoke through his teeth. "I suggest that you contain your hybrid." The officer spoke to Namjoon's father. The third staff, who was not busy trying to drag you out, approached carefully. "Sorry, but what's going on?" "We came to get Y / N, this is what is going on." Namjoon replied how hybrids generally aren't allowed to do. The staff looked confused. "Isn't she stray then? Are you her owners?" "No. She is a friend of our boy, we came with the intention of helping her." His mom replied, taking a step forward. The staff's face contorted, mouth twitched. "I see. But there's not much to do right now, I'm sorry. If she doesn't have any owners we need to take her to the shelter." "Even if we are here to take her home?" Namjoon questioned, incredulous. "We can't just put her in the hands of strangers, she is our responsibility. If you want to adopt her, then need to be in the shelter early in the morning." The guy smiled without much sympathy, he seemed too tired to be more friendly. "So, good night. Come on." He turned his back on Namjoon and his parents, the other two guys made even more effort to take you to the door. "No!" You cried, trying to kick and fight to get rid of them. "Namjoon!" "Get your hands off her!" Namjoon bypassed the policeman, ready to fight, to get you out of the hands of the two guys. It was necessary for the policeman and his father to hold him together to contain him. But there was no fight, because in the next moment the staff that was holding your arm was fed up and with a syringe on your neck made you sleep. The last thing you saw was Namjoon's face turning into a blur. The guy picked you up carefully, and now without resistance, took you out of the police station. "In any case, see you tomorrow." The staff nodded goodbye.

"Wai!" Namjoon called reaching out with the coat he brought you. "Can you give this to her? She's can get cold."

The guy looked from Namjoon to the coat and smiled.

"Of couse." He picked it and followed his coworkers outside.

"Y/N..." Namjoon yelped without knowing what to do, because what he wanted was to run after them and get you back, but there were still two men holding him in place, and one of those men was his father... He never disobey his parents. "Come on, son. Let's go home, yeah?" His mom took his hand in a conforting way, and everything he wanted was for her to hold him.

The three of them got back to the car in silence, Namjoon seated on the middle os the back seat as always - where he can see and talk to both mom and dad, regardless of who was driving - with his head low. His mind was working hard, the whole situation was so unfair, and he could only see one solution that would depend entirely on how willing his parents were on helping. He wanted to do it right, but things got complicated. Loosing you couldn't happen.

"Don't worry, son. We going to the shelter tomorrow and see what we can do." His dad spoke of the passenger seat. "They can't keep her against her will right?"

"Actually they can, darling." Mother bite her lip. "Hybrids are not citizens..." A tense silence ensued, the two don't like to talk about these things in front of Namjoon for fear of making him upset. "Mom... Dad." Namjoon softly called after some time.

"Yes. Baby boy?" Mom tried to make eye contact through the mirror, but Namjoon was staring at his hands. "Namjoon?"

He took a deep breath and started to speak, feeling a lump in his throat. "I was planning on bringing it up after the dinner. Is something I've been wanting for some time. Only now it's not just wanting, it's probably the only way..." He fighted the urge of crying, talking more firmly instead. "The only way of seeing Y/N again. I can't deal with the possibility of never seeing her ever again. I know is a lot to ask, but can you guys adopt her too?" ________________________________________________________________

Because of the tranquilizer you didn't wake up until the next day, in a strange place, full of strange smells. It was all very clean and you were sure you had never been there, it took you a while to actually wake up and remember the events of the previous day and deduce that it must be a room in the shelter that picked you up at the police station. Next to your bed there was another one, empty, although by the smell you knew someone sleeps in it. You were alone in the room. You tried to get up, feeling a little dizzy, wondering if you were going to the door or the window. In the process of getting out from under the covers, you found something with a familiar smell, a coat in which you slept hugging. You brought the fabric up to your nose and took a deep breath. "Namjoon ..." You put on your coat and chose the window, since the door would probably be locked. The image on the outside left you breathless for a moment. You had been in a shelter before, which you ran away from, but it wasn't like that. Outside there was a huge grassy space, full of hybrids running around and playing, they were obviously separated by type and breed, and employees in white uniforms were everywhere too. They looked happy. Hope of not being put down has arisen in your heart. At least you weren't going to die. The door behind you opened.

"You awake." A woman, a nurse, entered pushing a cart with a tray. "How are you feeling?"

"Good, I think..." You answered, putting the bed between you two. This detail didn't go unnoticed, but she didn't seem bothered, street hybrids are always suspicious at first.

"We needed to use tranquilizer on you yesterday, please let me know if you experience any side effects, such as dry mouth, dizziness, lethargy, loss of appetite, itching... Anything you are not used to. Ok?"

"Ok."

"I brought you breakfest." She smiled. "Aparently you won't stay with us for long, but we can't let you starve, right?"

Your heart dropped, and for reflex you looked through the window, to the other hybrids.

"What do you mean I won't be here for long?" You asked her, hoping she wouldn't look at you with pity or something like this.

She just motioned for you to sit on the bed and placed the food tray on your lap. You have not been able to see anything in her expression that gives you the intentions of the shelter towards you.

"A social worker will come and talk to you, until then try to eat." "Ok." You said again.

She left. And you were alone in the torturous wait, having only scrambled eggs and sliced apples to distract you. At some poit the hybrids playing outside started to get in ad the grass area got empty, except for some employees collecting forgotten toys and cleaning up the garbage that the hybrids left behind in their rush to get back inside. It should be lunchtime or something, or maybe... In the old shelter you lived in a few years ago, there were two moments of the day when the hybrids were on display for the public, for adoption, two periods, one in the morning and another in the afternoon... Maybe that was it. Maybe some of that happy hybrids would get lovely homes today.

You ended to eat and laid down on the borther of the bed, where the morning sun was hitting and closed your eyes. You were still with the dress, no one tried to get it from you, with is good cuz you paid... much more than money. You sacrificed a lot more than money in that shitty beultiful dress. You missed the chance to live with a good family and to be able to see Namjoon again. Even if you ran away and managed to talk to him, would he want you after you got arrested for assaulting someone...? Wouldn't his family forbid him from seeing you if he still wanted you? What would you do now?

Your lament was interrupted by a knock on the door which opened shortly thereafter, revealing a woman wearing a suit. "Y/N, right? Can we come in?" She said, behind her was another staff, which one you recognized as one of the staff that got you on the police station. You nodded, sitting up, and they came in. The woman got a seat in a chair beside your bed, the man stood by the door.

"How you today?" She asked, as you just shrugged in silence, she continued. "I'm the social worker. I guarantee that all hybrids that pass through this institution are well treated, have everything they need, that the documents are all up to date, exams done, and also I take care of adoptions, as well as... procedures for last resort. You got into a terrible mess yesterday, didn't you?"

"It wasn't my intention..." You mumbled.

"I've heard of it." She looked to the staf and then to you again, handing you a paper. "There are two names circled there, do you recognize those names?"

With your limited reading ability and the nervousness of having to answer the question, you caught your eye on the names really fast, one for men and one for women, and shook your head no. Nobody known to you came to your mind as you read them. "You don't know them?" The woman insisted.

"Not that I remember... Why?" You risked.

"This couple is interested on adopting you. How it sounds?"

You heart got race. What does she mean by adoping? You’re not even twenty-four hours at the shelter, and someone’s already interested in you? Like, how? That's weird. She should be lying to you.

"It sounds suspicious." You said lowly, not looking at her or at the guy at the door.

She nodded.

"You can meet them before any paper be signed. Your opinion will be considered here..."

You kept silence for a while... Thinking.

"How are they interested in me if they didn't see me at all?"

"They said their hybrid is your friend." She smiled, checking the tablet she has with her.

An electric current ran through your spine, suddenly you were sitting on the edge of the bed, facing the woman. "Their hybrid? What his name? Do you remember the name of the hybrid?" You looked expectantly at her. As she didn't awnser as fast as you wanted you reached at the staff, you never talked so fast in your whole life "Is the hybrid from yesterday? The one that was on the police statation to get me?"

He nodded.

"Is Namjoon here? Can I go to meet them right now?"

You put on your shoes and stood up, ready to go, looking from the woman to the guy and from the guy to the woman waiting for them to open the door and show the way. She woman stood up as well, looking satisfied with your good will.

"They are waiting in a visiting room. Follow me, and please behave."

You almost could't contain your eager, ears tilting in all directions as you walked between the two of them through the iluminated corridor till the elevator, eyes scanning the buttons and the colorful red light indicating the floors as you got down to the fist floor, nose sniff as a lot of diferent smell of diferent hybrids filled your senses in the corridor full of glass doors. She stoped in front of one of this doors and looked at you as if asing again for you to behave, and then opened it. You barely stepped into the room to see Namjoon walking back and forth in front of the couch, and in the next second his arms were around you, and yours were around him. His happy whining and you purr mixing as the embrace got tighter. "Are you okay? Did you sleep well? Did they fed you? You are not hurt, are you?" He showered you with questions, tooking you face in his hands to look at you.

"I'm fine. I was doped up, so yes. Yeah. And no." You smiled brightly, looking at him as well, then your smile dropped a bit. "You look like you didn't sleep well."

"I could't." He stated seriously.

"He was too worried about you, honey." A voice came from behind him, and you finally remembered you two werent alone.

The old lady you know as his mom was smiling at you from the couch, hand in hand with a man you supposed that was his father. You had the impulse of partially hiding behind Namjoon, your face red and your tail between your legs.

"Hello. Is nice to meet you. Sorry for the trouble." You took the courage to say, even if you felt o small.

"Is nice to meet you too." Dad said with a wide smile. Even if they haven't any blood connection, you could say he and Namjoon smiles in a similar way, warm. "Lets go home with us?"

You looked at Namjoon, waiting for his confirmation, to make sure it was real. He squeezed you hand, entangling you fingers.

"Mom thought it was cute of you of trying to impress her with a pretty dress. I told you, they already love you. Cus you are adorable."

You saw mom nod, agreeing with his words.

You shook your head yes, feeling your eyes getting wet with happy tears.

"Please. take me home" You hugged him again, not wanting to let go ever again.

You heard the sound of the pen against the paper as the documents were been signed, at same time you felt Namjoon's lips pressing against your forehead, drawing a satisfied sigh from you. You almost couldn't believe.

"We only need your fingerprint, and you're all set." The social worker said to you, pointing a specifc blank space on the papers for you to print on.

You eagerly did it, without leting go of Namjoon's hand. God, you will be the clingiest cat for a while, at least until you get used to having him everyday. You let a happy sound came of your mouth as you fingerprinted the last page.

"Now we go home?" You asked, jumping on your spot.

Namjoon's tail were wagging to all directions, hitting everything.

"Now we go home." He showed his dimples to you and your heart almost combusted.

Thanx so much for the request @theresa-nam-nam-me I had a really good time writing this (=ↀωↀ=)

#bangtanshadowfamily #bagtansonyeondan #bts #bts fic #bts fanfic #bts fluff #bts fanfic blog #kim namjoon #bts hybrid au #bts hybrid fanfic #bts hybrid fic #bts hybrid x reader #Namjoon #bts namjoon #rm #bts rm #bts rm x reader #bts angst

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stereostevie · 4 years

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LaKeith Stanfield Settles Into His Toughest Role Yet: Himself

As he heads towards his thirties, the electrifying actor is laying himself bare — and finding a new sense of balance

by Tirhakah Love Feb 12

For nearly a decade, LaKeith Stanfield has used his screen time reveling in the bizarreness of America’s racial consciousness. Whether Atlanta’s quippy street mystic Darius, or the code-switching sardonics of Cassius in Sorry to Bother You, his characters have always seemed to be in on the joke — and in his latest, Judas and the Black Messiah, Stanfield is closer to the secret than ever before.

Shaka King’s film, which chronicles the final days of Black Panther Party Chairman Fred Hampton (Daniel Kaluuya) through the sullen eyes of FBI informant William O’Neal (Stanfield), finds the actor in his darkest, most nuanced rendition of the Black saboteur to date. “It was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do,” the 29-year-old said over a Zoom call last week, “I just really wanted to make sure I was getting it right. But then also not getting it too right, if that makes sense.”

Stanfield has built a name on playing conflicted characters, but a figure with as much baggage as O’Neal — who was forced into his own role while still a teenager — demanded what he calls a “necessary nuance,” one that became, at times, overwhelming. The film set became not just a vision of radical Black politics, but a space for Stanfield to process his own upbringing in order to be a more “realized, holistic” person. LEVEL spoke with the actor about how playing O’Neal helped illuminate his path toward a healthier decade that included both therapy and meditation, heading into his thirties.

LEVEL: Judas and the Black Messiah was supposed to drop in August, but 2020 had other plans. How does it feel to know it’s coming out?

LaKeith Stanfield: I’m excited. I want people to learn about Chairman Fred Hampton’s story. It’s something that’s not spoken about enough. Everything has been such a question mark with this pandemic — not knowing how it was going to come out, or whether it would come out, period. So here we are with Black History Month, this story of Chairman Fred Hampton, and everybody gets to experience this in the most honest way we could put it in. I’m really happy. I’m going to host a screening at my house and just invite everybody… who’s been tested. [Laughs]

By my count, this is the second role that Daniel swiped from under your nose. Didn’t he get you for Get Out, too?

That’s right. You know what, for Get Out I auditioned for like every role. I came in and I read with Jordan Peele. And then I read for another — I think it was Rel’s role — and ended up eventually reading for my role. Damn, I forgot all about that.

How can we keep being friends with a dude who just steals roles from you, bro?

Nah, it’s all good. [Laughs] Ultimately, those decisions are made by people who have a better understanding about casting and their relation to the story than I do. If they’d asked me to play a hat in this movie, I would’ve done it.

It doesn’t seem like a Hollywood thing to do at all.

Hollywood is not always behind things like this. It took years to get it to the point where we could actually make it. These are stories people are yearning for. We have to always prove that time and time again, unfortunately, but it is what it is. We show and prove these kinds of stories are human stories. They’re specific to the Black experience, but it’s global. We hope that we can get these studios to understand that more and more.

How did you relate to [William O’Neal’s] isolation and paranoia he lived with? How did you tap into that?

I didn’t see him as someone I could connect to, so we started to design the character from the inside out. The thing is, we don’t have any information about O’Neal outside of his Eyes on the Prize interview, a couple of court transcripts, and other eyewitness accounts. We could create him from scratch and give him different dimensions. I wanted to introduce how he might be a thrill-seeker. He might get fun out of creating imbalance. He steals cars — he wasn’t very afraid to put himself in a line of fire — but he was also a person who eventually felt guilty about what he did. In the full-length version of his Eyes on the Prize interview, he says at one point, “I felt bad about the things I did, but I had to continue to play the role.” He contradicts that later by saying, “I’ll let history speak for me.” Clearly this guy has an internal struggle that we missed.

Wearing all these different masks.

In the scene where I had to poison him, a lot of it didn’t end up making it to the final cut, but we shot [me mixing it in] Kool-Aid, and I had to go through all those motions. With somebody like Daniel, who I just respect as a human and an artist, as Fred Hampton, it felt like I was actually poisoning Chairman Fred Hampton. One thing [co-star] Dominique Fishback mentioned to me is that your body doesn’t always differentiate the experience from your imagination. So sometimes your body thinks that’s real, everything you’re putting it through. It’s no wonder I’ve been feeling so stressed out and having panic attacks. I realized going forward before I step into something like that again, maybe have a therapist. [Laughs]

“There’s a dynamic between celebrity and the common man that Covid-19 has really lifted the veil on. We all gotta wear our masks or we suffer the same fate. You’re not special.”

For Black people playing an op it’s different. There’s real pressure. Especially for a character who’s never been portrayed.

That’s how I felt when I first figured out I found out who he was. But you don’t go into something like this not knowing that’s going to be the case. I hope I was able to portray him in a way that made people see themselves in the character. What decisions would you have made? Were you trying to go to jail for five to 10 years? Would you try to stay out? What does that mean? Those are the more important questions. Let’s say there’s a million people in the world: two of them are Fred Hamptons; the rest are William O’Neal. I want to challenge people to think about the ways they might be O’Neal-esque. And maybe through seeing this, you might distance yourself from some of those things.

If the pandemic has revealed anything, it’s the disconnect between the celebrity class and everyone else. People like Hampton and [Bobby] Seale are trying to do cultural work. We’re seeing that there’s disconnects here. How does a film like this impact your view of celebrity?

These roles are metaphors for so many things. Chairman Fred Hampton as a metaphor for socialism, selflessness, and O’Neal could be argued to be a metaphor for capitalism and selfishness, or perceived celebrity ego. There’s a dynamic between celebrity and the common man that exists, which Covid-19 has really lifted the veil on to a significant degree because we all sit in here on Zoom, right? [Laughs] We all gotta wear our masks or we suffer the same fate. You’re not special. This made everybody have to sit down and confront that idea.

[Laughs] Right.

One could argue that the fact that Fred Hampton died at a young age is justification as to why you shouldn’t try and put things outside yourself for the greater good, because it ends up being helpless and hopeless. I don’t agree with that. I think that Chairman Fred Hampton’s legacy lives on, like he said, “you can kill a revolutionary, but you can’t kill a revolution.” I remember being in that scene where Daniel was giving a speech, and I’m thinking, the things that Chairman Fred did all those years ago, today we are here experiencing this moment collectively because of him. While I’m doing this, I’m looking into the audience, seeing Afros, seeing Black people, seeing the beauty and the confidence and love, I don’t really even see that these days. So he zapped me back into a time where this is what people were on. We gotta find that in ourselves again and unlock it

You have a great way of playing chaos agents. Whether it’s a muted performance in Atlanta or muted in a different way in Uncut Gems, where your character was always on the fucking edge. Why do those roles as subversive figures speak to you?

I haven’t really thought about it but I know one thing’s for sure: I tend to lean toward characters who have internal dialogue or struggle. I like trying to find some groundedness and truth in the in-between of two extremes. These characters appeal to me on a subconscious level because that’s how I am. I like taking things to crazy extremes and then trying to find some kind of balance in that. I’m also attracted to characters being able to show the mirror to you and have you see something that activates something in you. Those characters that have you see yourself through absurdity.

You mentioned earlier how young these dudes were. Fred Hampton was 21 years old when he was killed. If he made 24, 25, I’m wondering how much more he could have gotten done. Being Black, we make it to 25, it’s a thing. You’re now about to make it to 30. How’s it hitting you? Do you think about age at all like that?

Not really. Not really, but to some extent, this is a landmark moment for me. I feel like I’m just starting to really get my shit together, like personally. And be the better version of myself for myself. I just started therapy just this year.

Yo, congrats.

Thanks man. Going into my thirties, I plan to continue to do it. It’s been helpful for me to unpack a lot of stuff. I’ve been through a lot of stuff, there’s a lot of things I just didn’t confront. Those things mount; you act out in different ways and they can become harmful to you. So I just said this year, I’m going to make the choice to try and be better. Like I was always throwing off therapy. I never wanted to try it. I was like, whatever. It was just something that’s bad in my family. Growing up, everyone’s like, “therapy, what the fuck are talking about?”

So I wanna continue working on that — working on myself and finding a better sense of balance, and by virtue of doing that, unlock more potential in my heart. And I’ll be able to express in a more realized, whole holistic way. Those are my ambitions moving forward.

There’s always a moment where you just know that you need it. That, there are strategies you just don’t have that you need to build to be a person. Was there a moment for you where it’s like, fuck I really gotta go to therapy. I really gotta get some help?

I wake up every day and I have the same thought: Fuck, I gotta go to therapy.

[Laughter]

I was kind of raised like a wolf. I didn’t have parents or people who were guiding me or told me anything. So I had to figure out everything on my own — try on masks and faces and hats and wigs — and try to figure out what my place is in the world. For a long time, I didn’t realize I was stunted because of that. Not having that at home, and at an early age being traumatized by things I was seeing. Just now, I’m starting to really find the tools to help me pull that young self out of that abyss. It took me a while to even realize there was a problem because I was like, “Oh, you guys are crazy. I’m not crazy.”

Were you shopping for therapists during the pandemic?

It’s all on Zoom now. I’ve found this really cool therapist. It’s great and perfect for me right now. Hopefully it continues to be the case. It’s helped me a lot. After doing press yesterday, I had another session and it was amazing. It helps you unlock things about yourself. It’s not even necessarily about the person that you’re doing therapy with, but like you said, perspectives and strategies and tools that you didn’t have access to before.

Especially in the work you do, it’s important to extricate yourself — that period of like, okay, I gotta get out of this. How have you come back to yourself in this period of time?

It’s been meditation. The one good thing about this pandemic is being able to sit at home by yourself and deal with yourself and just your inner voice. And even though that’s annoying as hell, beautiful clarity comes out of it. People would be surprised how many answers they can give themselves just by listening to themselves and not distracting yourself with so many things like social media or movies and stuff. Now, it isn’t easy, especially once you become hooked into a pattern, but it’s really worth it.

That’s been beautiful for me just to take those moments. It’s important and it’s taught me a lot about myself. And that’s kinda what pushes you. Now that you understand and recognize some of the issues that you want to make better about yourself, you can plan on ways to do that. Whether it means therapy or yoga, which I also started doing.

There’s a scene in the film that feels like the Last Supper, and it’s just gut-wrenching. That sense of dread is so hard to tap into, but it also feels of a piece with what so many of us have been going through — knowing that people are losing their lives, either from our government or from a virus, and living with that same dread.

It’s a real thing. I went to the hospital recently on some health stuff. When I was in there, there were a bunch of Covid-19 patients being moved about. Being in a hospital is pretty scary right now. People screaming and literally dying around you. There’s an overall energy. Like this feeling of loss permeating in the world today.

Before we started this movie, my best friend who I grew up with got killed by his brother. So I was carrying that with me the whole time. One thing that made those moments real for me is that I know what it feels like to lose somebody abruptly, violently. When we filmed me having to poison Fred Hampton, it was a really tough day — I was thinking about my own brother, just in a whole different place all day. On set crying. That sense of loss, knowing the violence of all of that, really informed everything for me. There was no distinction between reality and what I was experiencing in the moment. Most of the takes in that scene, I was actually bawling. I had to tone it back.

The worlds are just overlapping with one another. That’s fucking wild.

I hope having gone through all that, somebody watching it can be moved or touched. Maybe it helps put emphasis on Fred Hampton and why it’s so valuable to protect people like him.

As someone who lost someone close recently, some days it feels like your worlds are collapsing on one another. I just lost my dad this past summer. It’s weird to even talk about, but the fact that you have to just carry on, with your friend’s death sitting in the back of your head is…wild.

With movies, you never know if we’re doing the right take, or even if it’s ever going to be seen by anyone. Especially with something like this, you never really know. I’m so grateful for everybody putting their best foot forward. I want everybody to see it. I really want Black people to see it, especially Black kids in Chicago. I want them to see someone who really put things outside of themselves and put something first and gave in love. I just hope that somebody sees it and it touches them. It makes them think about something a little differently. That’d be dope.

This interview has been edited and condensed for clarity.

#black history #black men #black panther party #black panthers #black people #bobby seale #chicago #daniel kaluuya #fbi #film #fred hampton #interview #lakeith stanfield #shaka king #usa

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its-a-branwen-thing · 5 years

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On Qrow: Part II

Back at it again with the white vans an over-analysis of one of my faves! In my last post on Qrow, I focused a lot on how legacies play into his character. How he’s slowly becoming a character who can leave a legacy, but that the journey there is still ongoing. And it always is.

Disclosure, as always, this is all pure speculation, enhanced by my personal opinions, and for fun! :)

Legacies play into all of these characters. RWBY is about stories. Especially in regards to our heroes: specifically Ruby, Yang, Oscar, Juane, and Ren. All of them have character legacies that inform who they are today. Summer, Raven, Ozma, Pyrrha, Li Ren. These are all characters that we know had/have their own motivations, destiny, and ideals--and those echo through the narrative in such grand ways.

Mementos are a big part of these characters’ stories. While not all of these are explicitly physical items that serve as reminders, there are stories behind these shots and the objects or focus of them. Ren killing the Nuckelavee with his father’s dagger, Ruby’s mother and their shared silver eyes.

That’s why taking a look at a particular spot in V4 sparked a new idea:

Qrow is also a part of legacies. But this is one he was upholding. In V6 we saw his realization that his own followed legacy was in jeopardy--the one thing he’d staked his life on--and that continues to inform his faith in his nieces and the younger generation going forward. Because it isn’t Oz’s path he’s following, but theirs. Even if it is is hard letting them go it alone.

Qrow chooses his path at the end of V6, and it’s to help uplift this new generation, so that they can create their own stories in honor of or in spite of the ones that were left for them. It’s subtle, but it illustrates that Qrow’s growth has been in doing the things he believes is right, which is why he cautions James on so many of his decisions, why he seems to hang back, to lash out less, why he seems...well, softer. He’s not drunk, for one. And two he’s not as worried for his proteges. They’re taking fine enough care of themselves. Which is why the emphasis on his connection to Clover is so fundamentally important. Because if I look at it from a storytelling standpoint, we see these two characters express very similar ideals with completely different views of how to follow them. But it’s the story Clover has, the one where he’s a beloved leader and soldier, that impacts Qrow’s future the most.

It’s also between them that we witness one of the most brutal death scenes in RWBY.

My knee-jerk reaction to this scene was that it was the beginning of the Scarecrow “losing his mind”, so to speak, because it has been the pattern of the Oz generals to fall by the thing they were seeking in their allusions. But every time I followed this thought I couldn’t realize why it felt so wrong to me. I thought for a bit that Qrow might turn, the he might really and truly go crazy, but I honestly can’t see it. Why? Because if I’m reading Clover’s character right, we see that the fundamental differences between him and Qtow are what the story’s been pointing to all along: one is part of a legacy he never questioned, while the other has no tethers to his old legacies. Qrow’s placing his faith, quite certainly, on the future. (Also, if you wanted to make a point about the cruelty of reality, you could do it elsewhere. RWBY hasn’t really been that kind of show). And what really hit me as an important factor in this is the final shot of Qrow:

He isn’t angry. He isn’t gunning immediately for Ironwood. He looks heartbroken. He looks as he has all season--quiet, but in control.

He’s also holding onto...that’s right, a memento.

Yeah, back to talking about mementos, I am.

In seeing what was said about their relationship by the writers (communication not being 1:1 with writing/animating--also, again, not looking to discuss the implications of that at the moment, I understand and sympathize), I think I’m beginning to see some of Clover’s decisions, as they’re written, in a completely new light.

He’s cocky. He’s proud. But he’s a good guy. He encourages Qrow. He obviously likes him as a person. And this whole season we’re rooting for them to be good partners why’d you sneak in all that sexual tension though, yo, in whatever way that is. But then it’s made clear that Clover and Qrow both prioritize entirely different things until E12 when Qrow nods to Tyrian and...you know what I won’t even....no, I’m not even gonna poke that. The same different things that ultimately split team RWBY and the Ace Ops up. It’s even in their fights. If Qrow is the “Clover” to RWBY, Clover is the “Qrow” to the Ace Ops. Both the oldest and wisest of the de facto teams. Those fights are set up like that for a reason. Even them sharing shifting focus in E12 is significant. And RWBY wins because the Ace Ops don’t “care” about each other as they do, that’s the whole point that I can see. And so Clover shares his teams’ fate...but, like, way worse.

Clover knows when his orders seem harsh but he doesn’t question them. He’s never been shown to do so. He hesitates, sure, but so does Marrow. And unlike Marrow, Clover isn’t a new addition. He’s older. He’s their leader. It’s his charge they’ll follow. He’s not a character easily changed. We knew who he was the moment he swung in to arrest our heroes.

(Side note: I used to think this was a conspiratorial look that they were planning something. But I think now what I see is Clover noticing and then ultimately ignoring Qrow’s concern. His look hardens back to Ironwood with what I can now see as resolve. It’s why Qrow looks down. It’s almost like he’s hurt.)

So when we encounter this duo in the tundra, after their plane crash, and we see Clover’s character attempt to negotiate with Qrow, we see Qrow’s resolve harden. He isn’t going to follow Ironwood’s orders. He finds them wrong. But Clover is Ironwood’s right hand, he can’t listen to any personal feelings he may have, as Qrow and Robyn do. He even parallels Marrow in his conversations with Robyn, in that they both advise her to follow the law on two separate instances, and she makes it abundantly obvious that she thinks the law is rubbish. But Clover is the law. He’s supposed to uphold that trust. Because he’s entirely loyal. He’s a good person upholding a man he trusts. We don’t know his history, but I assume as the elite of the elite he earned his position. He spent years earning Ironwood’s trust (as Winter says--”You can’t buy loyalty you have to earn it”). And he isn’t a disingenuous character with sneaky ulterior motives. He’s how he’s presented. Point blank, heart presumably on his sleeve. I thought he’d turncoat to join our heroes, but now I see why he didn’t. (Then again, not having all the information is...testy)

Which is why this hits so damn hard.

“Sometimes the right decision is the hardest to make. I trust James with my life! I wanted to trust you.”

I wish I could emphasize that last line more. Clover is making an extraordinarily hard choice. He’s choosing loyalty to Ironwood over his partnership and relationship with Qrow. Because he trusts Ironwood more. This isn’t a character failing, it’s just tragic.

And with that last line I think he feels that Qrow betrayed Ironwood as well and, by effect, him. Because if Qrow had just listened to Ironwood’s plan and given himself up, none of this would have happened. But now that Qrow’s gone rouge, so to speak, he has to see him as an enemy. He has to use tactics to lure him to cooperate. Clover wanted to trust Qrow too. And at the end, like a lot of other trusting partnerships this volume, it ended in a loss of that trust. Also Qrow breaking Clover’s aura after the Ace Op has Tyrian on the ropes is SO. GODDAMN. PAINFUL. And when Qrow sees that Clover’s willing to follow these orders, he probably thinks he’ll follow any, and likely why he sees this as a betrayal. Because he’s used to that which i will discuss next time thank you.

What makes this scene so poignant, what makes me realize Qrow’s next arc is going to tie into what Clover left for him, is because Qrow likely understands exactly what Clover was going through. Once upon a time he defended Oz. He ran Oz’s missions. He put those priorities first. He bet his life on this fight. And in the end he didn’t even know the truth of what he was fighting for. Oz lied to him (Yes, I understand why). Meanwhile this whole season has been built on the prospect of lies. Qrow knows the cost of blind trust. He’s trying to tell Clover to listen to his conscience, not silence it. He’s trying to tell him to do the right thing.

And at the end, Clover seems to do just that by telling him, infuriatingly, “good luck.” Not just in the broader sense, although what an absolute madlad. But in the sense that he understands why Qrow chose that path. Why Qrow made that decision to refuse arrest although I’d be hella pissed about him teaming up with Tyrian! tho Why you done did me like that, bruh?!.

Clover’s telling him, really, to do what Qrow thinks is right. It’s the final note of evidence for my theory. Clover’s spent this season prepping Qrow to have faith in himself, and now it’s Qrow’s turn to realize that potential. It’s a blessing, really, that he gives him. To finish what he started.

And Qrow clearly keeps Clover’s charm. Because he’s carrying on Clover’s legacy too, and the mistakes that may have been made along the way. He has to remedy them. And this isn’t the only instance of a “baton pass” between these two. If Qrow is in search of a new legacy (which, truth be told, might involve bringing Ironwood down), then he needs a new team to do it with. And, as it’s been stated countless times by this show, he isn’t the waste of space he say he is and it is a damn shame he doesn’t have a new team yet.

Which brings me to my final desperate reach point.

“What would you guys do without me?”

#awe yeah carpal tunnel #rwby #qrow branwen #there will be a part III!#one day....#rwby meta #long af sry #im so flexible now ive reached so much #look i want qrow to also join the happy huntresses but i want him to interact with the ace ops too #savvy?

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malereader-inserts · 5 years

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Underestimate Me (I Dare You)

Fandom: Criminal Minds Pairing: BAU team & Male!Reader Summary: You have a fatal flaw that will get you killed one day, it’s underestimating, and boy it has an effect on you. Word Count: 1,815 A/n: We love making the reader so powerful because it’s our imagination and if we can’t be badasses in real life then might as well project it on to some fics. yo, the reader is OP. NOW TAKING IN CRIMINAL MIND REQUEST ONLY OF THE OLD TEAM, I HAVENT WATCHED THE NEW TEAM SO NO LUKE ALVERZ (sp?) REQUEST

You might be young, but that doesn’t mean you know anything less.

You’ve been on the team since you were twenty-three, you were two years younger than the great genius that is Dr Spencer Reid, and just because you were the baby of the group does not mean you were treated to be treated like one.

You’ve proved your worth on the team for the past five years, sure you weren’t that much of a genius like Reid but you were smart enough to get onto the BAU young. They treat you as if you were a fragile parcel and sometimes it was exhausting, you get that they were just being protective over you during the case when there’s a possible chance of you getting hurt.

But, you knew what you were signing up to, it wasn’t like you trained in an academy to become a spy slash assassin at the age of fourteen before running away to start a better new life. You were trained to do bad things and yet through the intense training, you became “deviant” - before they could send you out to do missions you were challenging the system before making yourself a target.

They planned to kill you, you weren’t complying, you weren’t conforming.

You ran away from the academy when you were seventeen, through finding your feet and studying hard you found a new beginning, a job that you could put your training to the test whilst doing the good thing.

All you ever wanted to do was to do good.

The FBI director, deputy director, and Chief of Staff and Special Counsel to the director was aware of your background, it was one of the main reason why the had hired you and made that information locked.

You don’t know what had triggered you during this case, all you remember was being pissed at your team for underestimating you and your skillset. You were a damn good profiler and an efficient agent in the field, and yet, you singlehandedly took down the suspects without killing them, maiming possibly.

Then, you flew back home, you didn’t talk to the team whilst they lectured you about the case. You just got in your car, went to the hospital to be patched up and stayed at home for the weekend. Now, you called in for sick leave because despite taking down five or six fugitives, you were injured and in pain.

Plus, it was an excuse to take some time to get away from your team.

Your bed was comforting, burying yourself closer to the depths of warmth that was engulfing you whole. You had to get up though, your stomach was rumbling - demanding for food.

As you get up you take a quick bathroom detour, washing your hands and staring at yourself in the mirror.

“Man,” You say, touching your black eye and the bruising on your temple the opposite side of your face, at your jaw was discolouring as well, “Looking good.”

You chuckled at the sarcastic remark you make as you pulled over a shirt over you, deciding that you’ll have to live with the shirt rubbing over your bandages.

Then, as you were about to cook up some quick noodles before crashing in your bed, a knock had interrupted.

“Fuck off,” You grumbled loud enough.

“Kid, you’ve taken a sick day and we’re worried about you,” Morgan’s voice came through.

“We?” You asked, slowly creeping towards the door.

“(Y/n),” Hotch’s voice calls out as you loudly sighed.

The team on the other side had been worried sick about you over the weekend, they gave you space during the two days and then talk to you when Monday came around however you were nowhere to be seen at your desk.

No explanation until Strauss had mentioned to Hotch you were taking a sick day, then they wondered if you were just avoiding them.

You looked pretty unhappy on the flight home, in fact, they were sure you were uncomfortable and wincing in pain.

You open the door before walking away, leaving the team to look at each other, slowly coming into your apartment. Cosy, full of books scattered across the floors since you’ve given up with the concept of bookshelves.

“So, what do you want?” You asked, moving your face into the freeze - cooing at the fresh cold breeze it had emitted out.

“We wanted to talk,” Emily says looking at Hotch, who tilted his head profiling you.

“Then, talk.”

You pulled out an ice bag, wrapped it in cloth, pressed it against your bruised temple and turning to look at them expectingly. They stopped short, as you let out another disgruntled sigh. Moving passed them and lying on your sofa.

“Ow,” You softly say, adjusting yourself, “You going to talk or just waste more of my time.”

“Alright, grumpy,” Rossi voiced, lifting your feet up and sitting down, then lowering your feet onto his lap.

“What are you-oh,” You silenced yourself when Rossi starts to massage your calves, making Morgan, Emily, and JJ amused, “Still, going to give me a lecture-?”

“I think we already vocalised our lecture on the flight home,” Hotch says assertively before switching his tone more fatherly, “We were more concern about you, truth be told, you look... shit.”

You smile at your boss cursing as you moved your ice pack to look at the team, scoffing.

“I’m pissed at all of you,”

“We noticed,” JJ affirmed your anger towards them, “Still don’t understand why.”

“Because I’m tired of being treated like I’m good enough, I’m not a child, I’m a grown-ass man!” You exclaimed, before sitting up abruptly, causing you to wince.

Emily came to your aid to help you sit up, her hand affectionately rubbing your shoulder. Without you noticing she tugs on your short sleeves, exposing the dressing strip to the team.

“And, I’m not enduring another lecture about that case again, yes, I get it, it was stupid of me. I could have died, whatever, blah blah,” You rolled your eyes, “I’ve lost my sense of life years ago, good luck in trying to restore it because I’m a lost cause.”

There was silence.

“I don’t know why I just said that,” You admitted, blinking slowly before shifting the ice back over your black eye.

“What happened?” Spencer finally speaks, as you looked at him, he cleared his throat, “There was blacked out text on your file, redacted, I just figured it’s something that contributes to your sense of life.”

“I’m fucked up, man,” You hummed.

“Aren’t we all,” Morgan agrees, sitting in your armchair with JJ sitting on the armrest.

You opened your mouth to speak, hunching your shoulders and letting out a defeated sigh as they waited for your explanation, oh how the tables had turned.

“I’m a defensive guarded person, being closed off is all I’ve ever know. My parents never really acted like parents.”

“How so,” Spencer asked, before stuttering out, “If you don’t mind us asking.”

You shrugged your shoulders, not caring as Spencer shift his awkwardness between the balance on his feet.

“My parents threw me into an academy for becoming a trained spy slash assassin,” You scoffed, shaking your head when you say it out loud.

“I heard about that,” Morgan nodded, pointing at you, “It was caught and the organisation ceased to exist now.”

“Oh, well, I cut my ties after becoming ‘deviant’ and having a grant over my head to be delivered on a silver platter,” You shrugged your shoulders, “There are a few things I’ve learnt is that one, what can be learnt can be unlearnt.”

“Behavioural approach in psychology,” Reid educated as you smile, nodding, agreeing.

“Two, I am a hardass, and three, I have a thing about being underestimated. It really grinds my gears that one, because they underestimated me. They didn’t think I could be a good guy after the shit I’ve been through, I hated that so I shoved it up their ass.”

Emily snorted, amusingly as JJ giggles, “So, underestimation?”

“Fatal flaw that would get me killed someday. I worked hard to prove to myself that I can be good and I’m not this killer machine they wanted, I’m a good person, so when you underestimate me as an agent it just got to me.”

There was a pause, removing the ice pack from your eye, opening the eye and allowing it to clear the blurriness way.

“Trust me, what I did in the last case was nothing compared to the training I endured,” You shake your head, “And, I’ve been worse than this.”

“With a background like that, I believe you,” Morgan says, eyes sympathetic, “Kid, you’re tough as nails.”

You huffed out a tired laugh, “Sorry for being moody, just-”

“It’s being human,” Hotch says, he was inviting and still had that fatherly tone to him, “Natural.”

“Yeah, kid, we’re your family, and family have each other’s back,” Emily noted to you, as you looked at your team, who smiles comfortingly at you, “But, you got to talk to us.”

“I’m not really a talker.”

JJ raised an eyebrow, “Well, you said it yourself, what can be learnt can be unlearnt, and we’re here to listen to each other.”

“I don’t want to burden you-”

“You’re really out of touch,” Hotch professed, “You won’t be burdening us if all we ever wanted was to have your back.”

Reid’s eyes sparkling with glee as you softly smile back, nodding slowly “Alright, alright, whatever, just stop being all gushy on me.”

Rossi gently squeezed your cheek, “Oh, we’re going full-on gushy.”

“Mhm,” You looked uncomfortable, “I’m not used to this.”

“Well, start getting used to it,” Morgan laughs, shaking his head, “It’s all you’ll ever get from now on, champ.”

You rolled your eyes as Emily ruffles your hair, your stomach grumbles as the team looked at each other.

“I’m making dinner! Reid, JJ, Morgan, Emily, come help!” Rossi announced, moving your legs back onto the sofa as everyone moves to your kitchen.

You leaned against the backrest of the sofa as Hotch taps you on the head. You looked at him questioningly.

“You’re the youngest on the team, it’s only natural for us to be more protective, but, never mistake it for being an underestimation. I think we all know what you’re capable of.”

You opened your mouth before closing it, “I was about to say something self-deprecating but um, I’m guessing you’ll say something.”

“You might be smart and very trained, but there are some things you need to learn.”

“If you say love. I will hit you, whether you are my boss or not.”

Hotch snorts and pats your head, affectionately, “Heads up, you’ll be bombarded with affection.”

“Great.”

“You’ll love it.”

You smile to yourself, already excited deep down what this new chapter of your life entails.

#bau team #bau team x male reader #bau team imagine #criminal minds #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds x male reader #x male reader

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the-irish-mayhem · 4 years

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It’s been a minute since I’ve done one of these but...

I saw WW84.

Spoiler-free reaction:

Spoiler reaction under the cut.

+ positives, +/- mixed reaction, -negatives

+We’re all in agreement that Barbara and Diana were 1000% on a date, right? They were on a date.

+I bought the HELL out of Pedro Pascal’s descent into madness.

+STEVE’S MAKEOVER MONTAGE TO MATCH DIANA’S

+Steve discovering the modern world with Diana! Peak adorable! I loved the role reversal.

+the soft, soft, soft, soft, soft, soft, SOFT wondertrev

+Max Lord, imo, ended up becoming a huge critique of capitalism. He quite literally went insane with his quest for more, and more, and more, and MORE, and you realize at the end that no matter how much more he got, A) he’s still empty and B) it makes you ask at what point do you stop saying more? The continual quest for more is utter madness.

+the invisible jet! they did it!!! It felt a little more like an earned extension of Diana’s power rather than something shoehorned. The pressure of the moment and Diana saying that she’d only made a coffee cup disappear once made the stakes high so that when she accomplished it, you actually felt relief and excitement.

+THE LYNDA CARTER CAMEO WAS PERFECT.

+I didn’t know how much I needed a bleeding Diana in my life until now. It really highlighted just how good she is that she’s still willing to sacrifice her body and life to save people and do the right thing.

+Gal Gadot was still great. I still wish she was beefier, but it drove home again that they really did cast Diana pretty dang well. Chris Pine, also fabulous! Kristin Wiig, really awesome! I questioned her casting a lot but I enjoyed her portrayal of Barbara. PEDRO PASCAL WAS AMAZING!

+Diana saving Barbara from the creep and literally THROWING HIM ACROSS THE ROAD AND SAYING ‘oh it’s just about using his momentum against him, super easy, I’ll teach you’

+/- the expansion of Diana’s powers. She was already flying in the last movie in her face off with Ares, but in this movie, they treated it as though she was just learning how to do it. Expanding the lasso’s powers seemed dicey because the climax of the movie ended up depending on a magical MacGuffin to make people see ‘the truth.’ It also made the last face off with Barbara and Max a little wonky because you didn’t really have a fully formed idea of what Diana could do. I love an OP!Diana, but I didn’t even know what crazy powers to get excited about.

+/- Identifying Steve Trevor only as a pilot when in the first movie his identity was almost exclusively as a spy. It seems like a little bit of an idealization of him as a person and ignores some of the morally questionable things he definitely did as a spy during the war. I love Pilot Steve and I love emphasizing his piloting skills, but it seemed just a little disingenuous to talk about him as just being a pilot when the truth was a lot more complex.

+/- Speaking of Barbara and Diana absolutely being on a date, they won’t ever confirm a WLW relationship in the Wonder Woman cinematic universe. (There’s no DC cinematic universe. It’s the WWCU as far as I’m concerned.) So as much as I enjoyed their date, it also made me kind of angry because it’s yet another tantalizing morsel of ‘maybe she’s queer but we won’t confirm it ever.’

+/- The Golden Eagle armor. I wish she would’ve donned it sooner, and I wish that finding it had been a bigger plot point that just Steve noticing it in Diana’s office.

+/- The craziness of the movie partnered with Magical MacGuffins and more plot holes than I care to think about made it feel a lot like the chaos that has dogged other modern DC superhero movies. It did have some more coherent focus and character moments compared to, say, the Justice League movie, and a lot of more hopeful and nice moments, but it was still... chaotic. Hence the spoiler-free gif being the whiplash between crazy and nice.

+/- I don’t entirely understand the fate of the villains. Are they getting off scot free? Did Barbara’s powers get taken away after Max renounced his wish?

+/- Alastair gave Max some nice character motivation, but that is the ONLY reason that kid existed. To make Max more human and to look cute.

-yo, what was the point of setting the movie in the 80s and having that POPPIN song in the trailer and proceed to NOT have Diana beat guys up while a sick 80s beat goes off in the background

-that being said, the music in this movie was not nearly as on point as it was in the first WW. I was thirsting for the original Wonder Woman’s Theme but only got some brief, remixed versions of it.

-I felt that Diana didn’t really have much of a defined character arc in this one compared to the last. In the first movie, we see her grow from naive and idealistic, to realizing humankind’s downfalls, to her choosing to still be an optimist and fight for the world in spite of it all. In this one she..... is an optimist still and is willing to fight no matter what? It felt like we didn’t really learn anything new about her.

-The world around Diana was really lackluster compared to the first WW. In the first movie, you had a whole assemblage of side characters who made the world feel very real and expansive. In WW84, the character web is extremely insular and limited. It really made the story feel quite strange, because this was supposedly a worldwide crisis, but we truly only see it affecting a handful of people.

-the number of plot holes was just... crazy.

-As much as it pains me to acknowledge them, DC does still consider the Superman movies, Justice League, etc. all canon at this point... in those, Diana is painted as a ghost, someone who’s very difficult to find/track, and some of the only hard evidence of her existence is the old photo from WWI. Yet in WW84, Diana is literally fighting in the White House with nary a care for who sees her. She’s running through the streets in her full Wonder Woman regalia. She’s storming through a shopping mall where literally anyone can see her. Sure, she takes out the surveillance cameras, but there are hundreds of people in that mall. Not all of them are going to keep that secret. It makes for a bit of a mess considering what she’s supposed to be like in the future movies.

-also.... how does Barbara even find them at the White House?

-Speaking of Barbara.... how does she not die when Diana electrocutes her? That whole last fight between the two of them took some LIBERTIES. I do wonder what the reaction would’ve been if Diana had actually killed her. Would it be a rehash of the Man of Steel debate, or could it have revealed some interesting stuff about Diana compared to Clark? I guess we’ll never know.

-The last showdown with all the villains was kinda just pure chaos. I barely followed what was going down, and Diana’s speech was lovely, but pretty corny. The resolution was also just a little too tidy if you ask me.

-I do wish they’d addressed some of the really creepy implications of Steve stepping into another guy’s body and life, but they never do. They could’ve very easily used Magical MacGuffin #1 to bring him back in a much less weird fashion, but instead, they CHOSE to have Steve ride around in another guy’s skin for the duration of the movie without addressing it AT ALL.

-THERE SHOULD’VE BEEN MORE SICK 80S BEATS DURING THE FIGHT SCENES I’M STILL SALTY OK

-SICK 80S BEATS THAT EVENTUALLY MELTED INTO THE OG WONDER WOMAN THEME IN THE LAST FIGHT. That is all.

#ww84 #ww84 spoilers #wonder woman spoilers #wonder woman 1984 spoilers #spoilers #wonder woman #dc #molly reviews

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what-is-your-plan-today · 5 years

Text

Stark Spangled Banner Ch1: Back Into The Field

Summary: Katie heads back to SHIELD following the crazy events in Miami and finds herself on desk arrest following a disciplinary for two weeks. But when catastrophe strikes on a mission, she kinda wishes she had stayed there.

Pairing: Steve Rogers x O/C Katie Stark

Warnings: Bad language (no smut, yet, but will be down the line. A bit of angst, injury and blood (some may find upsetting)

Stark Spangled Man: Re-cap

Steve was mad, furious, absolutely and utterly infuriated. His foot tapped as he rode the elevator up to the 95th floor where it pinged open and he stepped into the living area of the tower. Katie uncurled herself off the couch and started to speak before the doors had even shut behind him.

“I know you’re pissed…” she began, but he held his hand up, shaking his head.

“Pissed doesn’t even come into it…” he said, “Are you insane?”

“Not last time I checked.”

He felt his jaw tighten, this wasn’t the time for her jokes or quips. As he looked at she felt herself quell under his gaze and she dropped her eyes from his and sighed.

“I had to help.”

“You’re a fucking idiot_!” he stood, arms folded as he glared at her. She raised an eyebrow at him, but remained silent as he unloaded “You could have been seriously hurt, or killed… I told you to call me!”

“You’re only pissed off because you missed a chance to play the hero…” she snapped and then inwardly groaned. As soon as the words left her mouth she regretted them.

“Is…is that actually what you think?” he frowned, looking like puppy dog she’d just kicked across the floor.

“No, its not…” she said, shaking her head. “I didn’t mean…”

“I was worried about you!” he pressed, “Katie, you’re my best friend and I couldn’t cope losing you as well…”

As well as Bucky.

His sentence hung, unfinished, making her feel like shit. She sighed and crossed the room, slipping her arms around his waist. After a second or two he unfolded his arms and hugged her back.

“You should have called me.” He sighed, his tone softening as she lay her head on his chest.“It was so frustrating. Fury was refusing to do anything, if I knew how to fly one of those damned jets I’d have taken one myself…"

“Ask Clint for some flying lessons.” she said, stepping back to look up at him, sighing again as his face displayed no amusement at her attempted joke. “Look, I’m sorry, truth is, I didn’t think. We just got caught up and I didn’t want to drag you into something that wasn’t your fight. This was down to Tony and a very long list of people he has pissed off…”

Steve snorted as he released her from his grip “Well then it isn’t your fight either is it?”

“He’s my brother, Steve, I’d die for him if I had to.” she shrugged.

“How is he now?” Steve asked, following her towards the bar area.

“Seems ok.” she said, stepping behind it. “Recovering from the surgery, destroyed all his Iron Man suits…”

“He what?”

“Clean Slate protocol… blew them all up. Including the one he had made for me.” she slid an open beer across the bar top towards him. He caught it as he settled down on a stool, shaking his head.

“Wait, he made you a suit?” Steve frowned “An Iron Man suit?”

“Iron Maiden…” she grinned, leaning on the bar opposite him as he looked at her blankly. She rolled her eyes and grinned “They’re a band…rock… add them to the list.”

He raised an eyebrow at her and pulled out the notebook she’d gifted to him the year, making a note of the name, before he slipped it back into his jacket pocket.

“So he made you a suit…” he said, motioning her to continue.

“Yeah, well wasn’t much point seeing as I only got to wear it for like half an hour or whatever. It was only a prototype, nothing I could use with SHIELD either as it was too conspicuous, not that it matters anyway as he blew them all up, like a massive firework display”

“Why?” he frowned, bottle paused halfway to his mouth.

“Some kind of outward gesture to Pepper, basically said that any designs for a new one she gets to help him with…”

Steve took a big pull of his beer and swallowed. “That’s a big step for him.”

“Yeah, I know. He loves her.” Katie swallowed a mouthful of beer “And she loves him, she’s good for him.”

“Is she ok now after the whole Extremis thing?”

“Yeah. Tony managed to engineer an antidote with a bit of help from the SHIELD lab and she’s good.”

“And how are you?” he asked.

“Honestly?” Katie snorted, shaking her head “absolutely exhausted by all of it. Gods, Aliens, crazy assed super soldiers that explode…” her eyes narrowed as she eyed him playfully and suspiciously “you’re not gonna explode are you?”

“Not planning on it, no.” his crooked grin spread across his face.

***********

March 2013.

Any doctor would cry if they visited SHIELD; the caffeine and alcohol intake of pretty much every worker there would way exceed a dose construed to be healthy. Mind you, if you asked any agent whether they’d give up coffee or alcohol, they’d say alcohol in a heartbeat. Well, most of them. Katie couldn’t imagine surviving without an ice cold beer on a hot summer’s day, but she also didn’t function until she had her morning cup of Joe. It was a tough choice to make.

Not today though, she needed coffee. And lots of it. After ‘going rogue’ to chase the Mandarin with her brother Fury was pissed and as such was basically giving her the most boring thing he could think of- working through piles of mission reports, analysing and cross referencing them with others to pick up on common threads .To be honest, she didn’t mind it too much. After the excitement of the festive period she had welcomed a relatively quiet return to work, and didn’t particularly give a shit what Fury thought about her either. That said, it was heavy going, but as with anything she was soon engrossed, circling a part of the hard copy of the report with highlighter pen, before glancing back at the screen to cut and paste it into the Scrapbook App she used to trace trends with, letting out a groan.

Nope, this was officially crap.

Steve’s morning wasn’t much better. After one particularly gruelling Ops Training session, whereby one of the newest kids suffered a broken nose after colliding painfully with a stray shock baton, he showered and headed up to find Katie. She’d skipped the Ops training, not particularly needing it to be fair as she was a dead shot as it was, but her main reason was she was buried in work that Fury had dropped on her desk. He found her sat, paper in her hand and she was looking her computer screen. She sighed, scratching at her head before she dropped the file onto the desk letting out a groan. It was such a pure, natural action, Steve felt he was interrupting something, even though he knew he wasn’t. So he gave a little cough and as she turned round, her pretty face cracking into a smile which he returned.

“Fancy lunch?” he asked her.

She nodded instantly “God yes. Can we get FroYo after?”

“Yeah but don’t let me pile it with all that crap this time!” he shot her his best playfully disapproving look as he remembered the first time she had taken him to the Frozen Yoghurt stall. He had loaded his with all sorts of different things and the result had been beyond foul.

Katie gave a laugh and picked up her jacket, shrugging it on. He held the door for her and she stepped under his arm, and he followed her to the elevator.

“Stick to chocolate chip, mint and cookie dough!“ she said, stepping into it. “Trust me.”

They strode across the foyer and into the early spring sun. Katie pulled her jacket tighter around herself as they crossed the street.

“How are you just wearing a shirt?” she asked, looking at Steve as he fell into step besides her, making sure he was on the side nearest the road. He noticed that she’d long since given up chiding him on this old fashioned habit after he had revealed it was something he used to do for his mom too, and Bucky’s younger sister. She’s simply rolled her eyes but today he swore he saw something that looked like a soft smile flicker on her lips when he positioned himself on her left, but as quick as he noticed it, it was gone.

“It’s not too bad. Been through worse.” He grinned as he opened the door to the Deli for her. He followed her in and stood besides her in the queue and became aware that she was looking at him.

“What?” he asked, turning to her exasperatedly. Katie couldn’t help but grin, she enjoyed winding the usually mild mannered man up

“I’m trying to imagine how you would look with a beard. And with shorter hair.” she said causing the Captain to roll his eyes. He was used to her utter random comments now. She was very like her brother in that respect, her mind moved at about 100 miles an hour and half the time he had no idea what made her come out with the stuff she did and to be honest, he’d long since given up attempting to understand.

“Not gonna happen.”

“What the hair cut or the beard?” she asked.

“Neither.”

“Spoil sport.”

“Captain America doesn’t have a beard.” he shook his head.

“Steve Rogers could…”

She was impossible, but Steve couldn’t help but want to laugh. This playfulness was the thing that he enjoyed the most, how she could just treat him like any other punk she knew.

“Did anyone ever tell you you’re exhausting?” he rolled his eyes, a smirk playing on his face as she stepped forward in the queue.

“Yeah, you.” she spun round to face him, grinning “Several times. But you still come back for more.”

“Well I have the distinct impression if I didn’t you’d hunt me down anyway”

They ordered and ate their lunch, Steve filling her in on the ops drill and after Fro-Yo they made arrangements to slob out that evening at Steve’s with a film. Katie headed back to her office to continue sifting through the Mount Everest of reports she had to do. As with anything once she got the bit between her teeth, she completely zoned out. It was only when she heard a gabble of voices all bidding each other goodbye that she looked up from her work. It was dark outside, and past 6.

“Shit…” she groaned as the realisation washed over her. She was supposed to be at Steve’s for half past. She clicked to save her work whilst calling him at the same time, phone sandwiched between her cheek and shoulder.

“So…I’m running late” she apologised the instant he answered. He chuckled.

“I thought that you said the one good thing about being confined to desk duties was that you set the hours!”

“Yeah, well I got caught up in something…but I’m leaving now. Do you want me to grab pizza on the way?”

“Sounds good, not Chicago Style though. I’m hankering for a proper piece of pie.”

“God you’re such a New Yorker.” she rolled her eyes.

“You say it like it’s a bad thing.” he said, his voice taking on a mock hurt tone and she could imagine him pouting on the other end of the phone.

“Hmmm, I’m undecided. Right, I’m going now…see you soon.”

“Drive safe.”

“What are you my dad?”

“Old enough to be” he shot back.

“Touche.” she sniggered, cutting the call

*******

“Boring New York style for Mr S Rogers…” she spoke into the intercom and he buzzed her in. By the time she’d climbed the stairs he was waiting at the door to his flat, leaning on the door frame.

“Bout time…” he muttered, taking the boxes off her “Was about to send a search party.”

“Mario’s was packed” she said, kicking off her sneakers and heading straight through to his kitchen to grab a beer out of his fridge without waiting for him to offer, knowing he wouldn’t. He didn’t need to.

Steve headed into the living room, depositing the 3 boxes on the coffee table and reaching straight in for one of the pepperoni slices before Katie flopped down next to him, handing him a beer.

“What we ticking off the list tonight?” she asked.

“A Few Good Men.” he said, nodding at the tv where he had queued the movie up ready.

“Wait...did you manage to navigate that Android box all by yourself…” she looked at him and he sighed.

“I’m not completely useless ya know…”

“Jury’s out.” she teased, curling her legs up onto the sofa next to her.

They watched the film. Steve got most of the references within it. He chuckled in the right places, and laughed out loud when Katie was unable to stop herself uttering the immortal line “You can’t handle the truth” When the film had finished, Katie unfolded herself from where she had been sat and they launched into Steve’s favourite part of Movie Nights- the post film analysis.

“Who was the guy who played the colonel…errr Jessup?” he looked at her.

“Jack Nicholson” she said, “Amazing actor. He’s in a few on your list.”

“He was good. Kaffee annoyed me a little, arrogant, cocksure.”

“Reminds me of Tony” Katie sniggered.

“Well, I didn’t want to say anything” he said, giving a little smirk.

“You enjoy it?” she asked.

“Yeah, very good. Better than the one we watched the other night anyway.”

“Yeah, pisses me off though. I mean Galloway, she’s a strong female military woman and they still have to go with the romance angle. And with Kaffee too. Personally I’d have punched him in the face several times.“

“It does seem to be a tried and tested format” he said, leaning back against the cushions on his couch “Boy meets girl, boy likes girl, boy wins girl over…”

“Appeals to the hopeless romantic in all of us.” Katie shrugged “Crap like that, happy endings and all, never happens unless it’s in a film. What’s more likely to happen is boy gets you into bed and then fucks off when the chase is over. Well, most men anyway.”

Whilst her action and mannerisms remained neutral, the bitterness in her voice gave her away and Steve felt a surge of anger towards her ex. He’d never met the guy and still wanted to punch his lights out for the way he’d treated her. They continued to chat for a bit longer until Katie glanced at her watch,and seeing the time decided to call it a night. Steve walked her down to her car, he always did without fail, another thing she had given up chiding him for and when he came back upstairs and got in the shower, he found himself straying back to the first time he had seen her, the minute she had stepped into the light in the boxing gym and he’d found himself looking into the greenest eyes he had ever seen in his life.

The more he stood there in the shower and thought about her, the more he started to feel something…well…different. And he couldn’t put his finger on it. Was it that he found her attractive? Well of course he did. To be honest, he reckoned you’d have to be blind not to. And if he was totall honest, since he’d seen her the first time in that little boxing gym in New York he had noticed how pretty she was. She had the figure of the stars of his time. Hour glass waist, brunette hair, shapely ass and legs and quite large breasts considering she was so slim. But what did it for him were her eyes. Deep, warm green pools that he could lose himself in quite happily. And that smile, that fucking smile that could make him stop in his tracks when she flashed it. But it was more than just that, she was…well…just Katie.

It was strange, really, she reminded him so much of Peggy in some ways, but in others she was so different. Both were vivacious, smart, strong willed and beautiful. But where Peggy had been harsh, after a military upbringing, Katie had a softer edge to her. She was still ferocious at times, but she was a people person, and somehow knew exactly how to explain and understand what he was trying to say even when he struggled to himself.She made him feel at ease. With that in mind it wasn’t surprising they had grown so close. He could trust her and knew that she would do anything for him because she was a good person. And she made it so easy to be around, he didn’t feel a shred of awkwardness around her.

Who you trying to kid, Rogers?

He knew his feelings went deeper than that. All those times he'd felt irritation at other men looking at her or touching her, all those times he'd looked at her and just wanted to smile because she was just her... the fear he had felt when he had known she was off chasing the Mandarin and he wasn’t able to help...none of that was anything to do with mere friendship.

He leaned his forehead against the tiles of the shower cubicle and groaned. He was crushing on his best friend. He was so fucked. *******

Katie’s desk arrest didn’t last long. 2 weeks later she was catapulted back into the field, on what was supposed to be a simple op, simple by SHIELD standards, anyway. They had a request from the Cuban government – all very hush, hush, of course –to take down a drug lord who ran the cartel SHIELD had tangled with last year.

Katie read the files, all the intel, pulled together a briefing and delivered it, answering questions that came her way from the team and then handed over to Steve when it was his turn to take the floor. He started issuing out his orders, and informed everyone that the 3 newest recruits would be joining them as it would be a fairly straight forward op to ease them into.

And it had been, for the most part, until one of those new recruits, Steven Adams, had frozen mid fire fight and as a consequence he’d taken 3 bullets to the chest.

“I got him…” Katie said, calmly taking aim at the hostile responsible and as soon as she knew she’d hit him, she broke cover to get to Adams, as she was closest to him. She skidded to the floor, pressing her hand to his chest and her other reached to his face, turning it to look at her.

“I got you…Adams…look at me…” she said gently, her hand warm, wet and slick with the young man’s blood. Steve dropped besides her and she turned to face him.

“I can’t stop the bleeding…” she said, her tone giving away exactly how worried she was.

“Medic, NOW!” Steve yelled, looking around frantically for help “We need emergency evac…”

“This is just like Coulson all over again…” Katie mumbled to no one in particular as she reached into her belt and retrieved a tab of morphine. Steve gripped the young man’s hand as she administered the pain relief.

“Son,look at me…” he instructed and Adams horrified eyes turned to Steve “That’s it, keep looking at me…”

Steve swallowed, figthing to keep his face calm. He’d seen that look so many times on the battle field, the look that told him the man who lay injured knew he was injured beyond repair, that there was nothing to be done for him. But this was now, 70 years into the future, medical science had worked so many wonders since then, they had to be able to do something, right?

“RUMLOW WHERE THE FUCK IS THAT MEDIC?” Katie screamed, her tone frantic.

“Still got hostiles on us!” Rumlow replied in his ear “Evans has taken 4 down but they’re approaching from the right! We need to cover the medics in and now you’re down there…”

Steve instantly looked round before he looked back at Katie “We can take him ourselves”

She bit her lip, looking at the young man, then up to Steve again. Everything in their training told them not to move casualties, but Steve knew if they stayed here he was going to bleed out.Katie seemed to come to the same conlcusion a she nodded.

"Alright…Brock, we’re coming to you. Have the medics prep the bay…Evans, we need top cover…”

“Roger, Nova…”

“Steven… we’re gonna move you now.” she said, looking at him, her voice calm and level. She took his hand out of Steve’s which allowed the captain to haul him into a lift over his shoulder. Once he had the man positioned he gave a small jerk of his head and Katie picked up his shield in one hand, and her pistol in the other as they broke cover, sprinting across the front of the industrial yard towards the jet. In the corner of his eye, Steve spotted 2 hostiles moving but before he could shout a warning, Katie had fired off 2 shots, the thumps and lack of returning meaning each bullet had hit its target. Soon they were joined by Rumlow who flanked them up the ramp where she dropped the shield to the floor and offered her hand back to Adams, Steve placed him gently on the stretcher.

“It’s gonna be ok…” Katie said, soothing him as the medics bustled around, glancing up every so often to watch what they were doing.

“Can you tell my mom…I love her…and dad…” Adams was mumbling now and she shook her head.

“You can tell them yourself. “she smiled “you’ll be fine, I promise…”

“We’re locked down outside, local authorities are handling it now. How’s he looking?” Rumlow asked as he stepped up besides Steve who had stood back from where Katie was knelt by the injured man. Steve turned to Rumlow, shaking his head sadly.

“Not good. He lost a lot of blood.”

At that point Katie suddenly drew back slightly, looking at the hand held in hers, before she glanced at the medic who was sadly shaking her head. Katie threw her head back closing her eyes as her face screwed up.

“Shit.” Rumlow muttered as Steve pinched the bridge of his nose with his thumb and middle finger.

“Radio base” he turned to Brock, his voice soft “Let’s get him home.”

*******

Writing mission reports wasn’t Katie’s favourite thing to do, but this one was awful. So she’d treated it like ripping off a band aid, and after a horrific nights sleep, she’d been at the T riskelion early to get it done. As a result it was little after 10 am, she was done for the day and was about to head home until she heard a familiar voice.

“Eat me…eat me…” The voice was accompanied by a bag from her favourite bakery, which was hovering in the space between the door and the frame, before Clint Barton’s head poked round the side, a grin plastered on his face.

“Hey!” She beamed at her friend as he dropped a cup holder containing two coffees and the bag onto her desk before taking a seat, scooting the wheeled chair over the floor towards her.

“Heard you had a rough time of it yesterday so I brought donuts and almond croissants.And coffee.”

“Hawkeye, you are a godsend.” she said, taking a large drink and leaning back, closing her eyes.

“That the first time you’ve lost a man on a mission?” Clint asked.

“Other than Coulson.” she shrugged. “He was 24 Clint. His whole life ahead of him.”

“How’s Cap taken it?”

“On the outside he seems ok, but I know he blames himself. Keeps saying he shouldn’t have taken him.” Katie shrugged “He’s gone with Fury to see Adams’ parents. Rather him than me.”

“This job is hard.” Clint said after a moment “We fight to keep everyone safe, but y’know, sometimes not everyone makes it. Thing is, if we can’t find a way to deal with that, then maybe next time no one gets saved at all.”

“You mean like Collateral damage?” she snorted, shaking her head.

*******

Adams’ parents already knew he was dead. Which made it slightly easier. Fury had the local authorities call ahead, common practice now, but still Steve found himself sat on their couch, talking, informing them all about their son’s last moments. They hadn’t shouted, hadn’t screamed or blamed him. Instead, they’d thanked him for what he had done and for bringing him back so they could hold a proper burial.

By the time he got back to base, he was exhausted.

“Here.” Fury said, handing him a glass of scotch from the bottle he had pulled out of his desk. Steve took it, dropping into one of the sofas at the side of the large office, Fury settling into the other. Steve knew the drink couldn’t’ get him drunk, but he liked the momentary buzz he got that lasted all of 60 seconds post sip.

The scotch was smooth, he expected nothing less from the boss. And the pair of them sat in silence for a few moments.

“Ever done that before, a death message?” Fury asked, leaning back.

“Can’t say I have. Wasn’t really my job back in the day.” Steve said, undoing his tie.

“Worst part of the job. Doesn’t matter how many times you do it, never gets any easier.” Fury ran his hand over his face, and it struck Steve how tired his boss actually looked.

“Yeah, it isn’t exactly up there with my favourite thing to do.” he said, rolling the tie up and shoving it into his old Army uniform pocket.

“How’s Nova?” Fury asked.

“She’s upset.” Steve sighed “But she’s strong, she’ll be ok. I’m gonna head over and see how she is later.”

“You two spend a lot of time together outside of work.” Fury commented, innocently enough but there was something in his tone, something that was almost good natured accusation.

“Not a problem is it, Sir?” Steve asked, face straight.

“No, not at all.” Fury said “Why do you think I partnered you up in the first place? She’s a people person…”

“She’s a good friend.” Steve nodded “We get on.”

“Glad to hear it.” Fury said “There’s going to be a debrief with the Secretary of Defense tomorrow.”

Steve sighed “If they’re looking to blame someone, the buck stops with me. I should never have taken the kid.”

“Bullshit.” Fury said simply “I’ve read the reports. From what they say, he just froze.”

“He wasn’t experienced enough.”

“It was a straight forward in and out job Captain.” Fury leaned forward. “What happened was an accident. A tragic one, but an accident none the less. From the reports, neither you nor Stark could have done any more to save his life.”

Steve shrugged, the words were kind but didn’t help him feel any better.

“Taking risks is part of this job.” Fury said simply “It’s a dangerous gig.”

3 glasses of scotch and an hour later he shook the director’s hand and left the office, pulling out his phone. He didn’t want to appear like he was checking up on Katie, so he pinged her a text, dressing it up like it was him who needed to see her, which wasn’t a complete lie. He did, he was craving the normality she gave him.

Can I come over? I could do with seeing a friendly face

He read it a few times, before deciding it was casual enough before he sent it. The reply was almost instantaneous.

My door is always open for you. And I made Mac and Cheese…plenty left.

He couldn’t help but smile. One of the best things about this “new life” was the food, and her Mac and Cheese was frankly his favourite thing to eat on the planet. He shot a message back.

He changed into a pair of sweat and a hoody, hastily making his way to her penthouse and the the smile she gave him when he walked into her place instantly made him feel at ease.

“Hey…” she said, crossing the space towards him and giving him a hug which he happily melted into, a hug they both needed.

“how did it go?” she asked, pulling away.

“As well as can be expected.” He sighed as he followed her into the kitchen, dropping into the stool on the other side of the breakfast bar. “His mom broke down but…they were ok about it. They didn’t shout or yell…”

She flipped the lid off a beer and handed it to him. He took it, with a nod of thanks and pulled a large swig as he sat back down, staring at the bottle in his hand.

He was brooding and blaming himself, Katie could tell so she gently lay her hand on his, reaching over the counter.

“it wasn’t your fault Steve.” she said, gently. She did that all the time, knew what he was thinking. It gave him the unnerving impression that sometimes she could read his mind.

“I should have spotted that shooter…” he said, shaking his head.

“I’m the fucking mission analyst.” she sighed. “I knew from last time those guys were packing, if I’d done more research, maybe I would have found out about the armour piercing rounds…”

“You can’t seriously blame yourself?” Steve’s head shot up unable to believe she actually thought that.

“Why not?” she sighed sadly. She’d been over it a million times in her head that day and had come to the same conclusion every time. She should have spotted something, dug further. “I didn’t do my job.”

“Yes, you did.” he implored, his eyes locking onto hers “Your report clearly set out the layout, the learning from previous missions…Abrams was just too inexperienced, I should never have taken him…”

There was a pause as the microwave pinged and Katie turned to look at it.

“You know, Clint made a good point before.” she said, reaching in for the plate and the smell of the food made his stomach grumble again as she continued “This job, it’s hard. We fight to keep people safe but not everyone makes it back all the time…and if we can’t learn to live with that then maybe next time no one gets saved.”

“It feels like trading lives.” He said as she placed the plate down in front of him “It’s just wrong.”

“I know…” she said, handing him some cutlery and sat down next to him.

“You eaten?” he asked, looking at her, suddenly aware she didn’t have a plate. She nodded.

“Couldn’t have waited until now, I’d have starved to death…” she said, shrugging.

“Hardly.” he replied, mouth full, instantly realising he had said the wrong thing as she narrowed her eyes at him.

“No, that’s not… I mean you’re tiny…” he said, almost choking on his food through his protests.

“So now you’re making short jokes?” She said back, Steve looked at her, dismayed she thought he was picking on her but then he spotted the look in her eyes and rolled his own.

“Punk.”

“Jerk” she shot back.

It was the perfect way to escape the trauma and stress of the last few days. Once they had finished eating the two of them flopped down on her large L shape sofa, Steve’s legs extended along one side of the L shape, her legs on the other as she leaned against his shoulder. He couldn’t help but notice the smell of her shampoo…apple, he thought, along with her perfume. Her proximity was making his head buzz but he wasn’t about to move her. The contact was comforting, clearly for her as well as about an hour or so into the film- the first in the Lord of The Rings trilogy- he felt her head growing heavy. He glanced down and saw that her eyes were closed and as he watched her head slipped slightly. He shifted so that he could catch her gently, and grabbed a cushion from behind him. He placed it against his leg and manouvered her head so that she was lay down, gently brushing her hair off her face. She stirred slightly, snuggling down further into the cushion as he absentmindedly rubbed between her shoulder blades as her breathing grew gentle and even.

Steve stayed like that, engrossed in the film right to the end, surprisingly. He had enjoyed it. Katie hadn’t woken up, and he looked down debating whether or not to wake her or simply carry her through to her bedroom. Pondering for a moment, he decided to do neither, reaching for the remote as he sifted through to find something else to watch. He didn’t want to leave just yet, he was too comfy and too at ease. Picking one of his favourites, Casablanca, he settled down, getting himself comfy as he immersed himself in the familiar world of Rick’s Café Americain. At one point he felt his eyes growing heavy and he lay his head back, deciding to rest them for just a little while…

“Steve…” The voice was louder, but not loud enough. No, he had to get to Bucky…

But he was gone, Steve was grasping at nothing but air.

“Steve…” Katie was doing her best to wake him from his obvious nightmare after he had jolted her awake, thrashing in his sleep. She placed both her hands on his shoulder and shook him. Softly at first, then a bit stronger, trying to shake him out of his sleep. His face contorted into a silent scream and then he jerked awake, his eyes wide, breathing deeply. It took him a while but he suddenly realised where he was and whose eyes were looking at him he took a shaky breath and lay his head back.

Damned it, he’d fallen asleep and had a nightmare. On her sofa.

“Shit…sorry…” he said, his voice croaky “I err…”

“Don’t apologise, it’s fine.” Katie said, gently “I’ll get you a glass of water.”

Whilst she was gone he leaned forward, swinging his legs off the couch so his feet touched the floor, wiping his clammy head with his hands.

“Thanks…” he said as she handed him the glass. He took a large gulp, his breathing returning to normal.

“You ok?” she asked, kindly as her hand gently knotted into his, her concern evident.

“Yeah, just a nightmare…” he said softly “I’ve not had one for a while.”

“Understandable with what’s happened.” she said softly “What was it about?”

“It was…just Bucky.” he said shaking his head, “I saw him fall…”

“You know you can talk to me about it Stevie.” she said softly “It might help.”

“They’re always the same.” he said, shaking his head, swallowing thickly “I either replay him falling or me going into the ice…”

She didn’t speak, simply waited for him to continue and for a moment she though he wasn’t going to, but then after a sigh he leaned forward and placed the glass on the table and ran his hands over his face again.

“It was a Hydra train,” he started, “We had a tip that Zola, a Hydra scientist was traveling somewhere and thought that it was our chance to capture him. One step closer to taking down Hydra. There was a blast from one of their weapons and it bounced off my shield and blew open the side of the train car and Bucky was thrown out.” he blinked, swallowing “He grabbed onto a bar and it wasn’t stable, and he fell.”

Katie stayed silent for a moment before her hand curled round his shoulder and she pulled him to her, causing him to lay his head on her shoulder. “You know it wasn’t your fault.”

“I should have done more” he said softly. The guilt ate him up every day, that he had survived, why had he deserved that any more than Bucy?

“How?” she said again. “How could you have done anymore?”

"I should have gone after him.” he said quietly.

“What would’ve changed if you had?” Katie asked “There’s no way he could have survived that fall.”

“He wouldn’t have been there if it wasn’t for me.“ he said softly, "I should have gone after him, brought him home, done something.”

Katie remained quiet, her hand gently running through his hair which was nice, far too nice. He took a deep breath and sat up moving away from her touch.

"What time is it?” he asked, clearing his throat.

“Nearly six in the morning” Katie replied

“You’re kidding?” Steve snorted.

“Nope. You want some coffee?” she asked, standing up.

“Yeah if that’s ok…” he replied, following her to the kitchen. From her body language he could tell she was rolling her eyes, even if she wasn’t facing him.

“I don’t know if your Ma ever told you, but it’s rude to run out on a girl after you spend the night with her.”

“And as you know, I’m useless with women.” he said, as he sat down at the barstool on the breakfast bar. He watched her, but he didn’t say anything. She bustled about, throwing some bread in the toaster and went to the fridge for the butter, marmalade and jam, sliding them onto the island. At that point Steve held his hands up.

“You don’t have to-” he started to say, but she silenced him with a glare, similar to the ones Peggy used to give him, the look that could stop him in his tracks it was that stern.

“Shut up.” she said, pouring them both a cup of the coffee before adding milk and a spoon of sugar to both, passing one to him. The bread popped up from the toaster, and she put it on a plate before handing it to him and adding more bread to the machine.

His stomach rumbled and he gave in, smearing butter over his toast. He eyed the jam curiously. He’d had marmalade before but…he looked at Katie and she nodded. “It’s good…”

So he added some, and after a bite he concluded she was right, and nodded in agreement. Once the next round of toast was done she sat next to him.

“So…when did I fall asleep.” she asked, swallowing her food.

“About an hour into the film.” he said, taking another bite of his toast.

She shook her head “What an ass…”

“It wasn’t a problem.” He replied honestly with a shrug, chewing his breakfast “to be honest I enjoyed it.”

She looked at him “What, me drooling on your leg?”

He swallowed, his eyes wide “I meant the film.”

“I know…” she smirked, and he rolled his eyes before he smiled softly.

“Punk…”

Tags @the-omni-princess

#stark spangled banner #steve rogers #steve rogers x original female character #steve rogers x oc #katie stark #mcu #mcu fanfiction #marvel #marvel fanfiction

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shockersalvage · 4 years

Text

DRB+ Flow Translation

This was done mostly out of wanting a translation that flows well with the song, since other translations I found, while accurate, sound rather awkward for the song. They don’t go smoothly. So this is my attempt at reconciling that. Thankfully, the official lyrics were online for me to look up and get a feel on what they’re saying, as well as major props to @eng-hypnosismic and Twitter’s MC Kranke, for giving me something to compare to to make sure I was on the right track. You can use this as long as you give credit. Anyways, enjoy!

Division Rap Battle (+)

All:

As our oath stands, fight to the last man!

We’re the invincible rogues who won’t run!

Words have become machine guns!

Or our compass to the future, ah!

Three in line! It’s showtime!

History will be made with our style!

It’s between life and death that we rock,

So we’ll leave it down to our instincts, say what!?

BB:

One, two, three,

Ikebukuro Division (Represent Ikebukuro)

Homies, we are Buster Bros! All good with you though!?

Welcome to the Division!

One, two, three, Ikebukuro Division! (Represent Ikebukuro)

Homies we are Buster Bros!

We’re ‘Bukuro’s Best Bros!

Welcome to the Division!

Ichiro:

Welcome to my Division, Ichiro!

Ikebukuro’s rep from macro to micro!

Savin’ the day with a precise geek style!

So OP, I’m usherin’ a new wave of crime!

Giving anima, that’s our only karma!

Zero hesitation when rap is your only lifeline!

2D to 3D, I’m just me all the while, yeah!

Wiseass pricks can just screw off!

Jiro:

Yo, my name is Jiro!

You know my steelo!

Look at my tongue, I'm like Michaelangelo!

Got traced from Ichiro’s torso!

These inherited genes make me the best rhyme clone!

Saburo:

Saburo, hello, my civility is a persona as I lack brakes, but that’s sub-rosa!

Bad pose, huh? Step outside and let us go!

As you keep increasing your speed,

You're gonna smack right into the wall, no?

MTC:

One, two, three!

Yokohama Division!

Represent Yokohama! Homies we are Mad Trigger Crew!! From a ‘Hama midnight car chase!

Welcome to the Division!

One, two, three! Yokohama Division!

Represent Yokohama!

Homies we are Mad Trigger Crew!

‘Hama breeze won’t rust our skills!

Welcome to the Division!

Samatoki:

I’m Samatoki “The Mastah”,

Who da hell are ya?

Ya lookin’ like fools I’ve sent to da crusha!

If ya let ya desire break ya code of honor!

Ya only gonna get what you desoive!!

That’s what up! (What up!)

Wake up! (Say what!?)

Chivalry, a cop and a freaky navy, yo!

The trio of outsiders that boast Hypnosis Microphones!

Gonna use our rhymes to end ya life and ya show!

Jyuto:

Yeah, stop, stop, stop!

It’s a pain to do cover ups!

You cross the line, then I will speak up!

You can’t win, my ass got the full backing of all the higher ups!

If you’re aware, then there’s no need to square up!

Rio:

Salute the day, prep for Curry Friday!

For me, everyday is survival!

All kinds of life have made me grateful!

But for this main course, I’m gonna serve ya!

All:

It’s tonight, that we end this fight!

Growl out, Hypnosis Mic!

Rhymes shot are well customized!

This sacred sound leaves your synapses fried!

Three in line! It’s showtime!

History will be made with our style!

It’s between life and death that we rock,

So we’ll leave it down to our instincts, say what!?

FP:

One, two, three! Shibuya Division!

(Represent Shibuya)

Homies we are Fling Posse! Paint the town with RGB, yo!

Welcome to the Division! One, two, three! Shibuya Division! (Represent Shibuya)

Homies we are Fling Posse!

We’re gonna go with the flow!

Welcome to the Division!

Ramuda:

Everyone’s idol, Ramuda, is upfront!

I may not look like it but I’m an adult!

It’s painful to see you cry and sulk!

Your smiley, sleeping face is cuter, that’s what!

I love the showy, basic, hue; The style of the Gyaru!

To mode, punk and American Casual!

I get all kinds of unique ladies!

But I don’t want them fighting over me, see?

Gentaro:

Bearing a boater brings out suspicion?

Still, I vow to deliver bizarre truth and fiction!

While the ways of heaven can’t be deciphered.

My literary prowess makes me the best rhymer!

Dice:

It’s plain as day, I gotta gamblin’ itch!

No guarantee, but winnin’ will make me rich!

Gonna go with my sixth sense here!

In a flash, the game is won by the joker!

MO:

One, two, three!

Shinjuku Division! (Represent Shinjuku)

Homies we are Matenrou

Representing Shinjuku the sick city.

Welcome to the Division!

One, two, three!

Shinjuku Division (Represent Shinjuku)

Homies we are Matenrou!

Of the sleepless neon city.

Welcome to the division!

Jakurai:

Begin the surgery, OK? (Ok!)

Teary patients today, (Please go ahead!)

Leave it to me and you’ll feel no pain! (Not at all!)

But resist and you’ll be six feet under!

The endoscope renders lies asunder!

In your skull center, yet you make this harder,

Stop resisting, you foolish Motherfucker!

Hifumi:

Yes, you chose me, thank you all, now the call!

All my lovely kittens!~ (Love me do!)

Yes, tonight! (Foo) For you! (Foo) I magically (Foo) Deliver! (Foo!)

A starry night sky and (CHAMPAGNE TOWER!)

Doppo:

God, I’m so tired and my suit is killing me

Wait, oh no, God don’t tell me please!

The train won’t stop on this line!?

Perhaps, I’ll quit and fall to society’s wayside!!!

Will I make headlines as a cranky old guy!????

All:

As our oath stands, fight to the last man!

We’re the invincible rogues who won’t run!

Words have become machine guns!

Or our compass to the future, ah!

Three in line! It’s showtime!

History will be made with our style!

It’s between life and death that we rock,

So we’ll leave it down to our instincts, say what!?

BT:

One, two, three!

Nagoya Division! (Represent Nagoya)

Homies we are Badass Temple!

Purgin’ rotten priests is simple!

Welcome to the Division!

One, two, three!

Nagoya Division! (Represent Nagoya)

Homies we are Badass Temple!

Such words are foolishly terrible.

Welcome to the Division!

Kuko:

Reincarnation, fate is heartless!

Time for a jackass jam session!

I’ll give these small-fry, Preta’s a sermon!

Bishamonten in heaven is scarin’ you for all its worth!

Only we deserve honour, above Heaven and Earth!

Give it your best,

Bang it, bang it out!

You won't beat this test!

Quit ya teasin’, this Buddhist is a vandalist!

London Calling, from the Shakadou, face my descent!

Jyushi:

Darkness, to drown in its midst

As fear for my life in this mist.

Searching the corridor, vagueness leaves me to yearn,

A siren’s lost performance!

Hitoya:

I really hate such shitty coffee!

Sorry, my skill in ‘self’-defense ain’t for burdens, bro.

No matter how much you beg it’s weak, bingo!

All that immature prattle, yo, will need a take back!!

DH:

One, two, three!

Osaka Division! (Represent Osaka)

Homies, we are Dotsuitare Honpo!

We’re elegant and eloquent!

Welcome to the Division!

One, two, three!

Osaka Division! (Represent Osaka)

Homies, we are Dotsuitare Honpo!

It’s our grand debut!

Welcome to the Division!

Sasara:

What’s up, Doc? You’re so dull!

Both mind and rhymes are way too stiff,

Pride’s high on a cliff,

Just like that rigid tower of heaven!

If ya keep makin’ stops, ya tempo’ll get uneven!

Trip into a failing grade in a jiff!

Comedy tournament: I demolish it,

Custom suits are top percent,

No dice in the sight department.

(Tuppa’ baggin’ in da chaos)

I acquire: caviar, foie gras, majah vocabulary!

I can’t even, I’m outta here, seriously!

Rosho:

Sold by gram and weight is all this curriculum!

A bunch of chaotic BS makes the public school system!

School violence is such damn shit!

From the homeroom, we all shall curb this outdated nihilism!

Rei:

The Sea for a-thousand,

The Mountains for a-thousand,

There was a snake who became a dragon.

For the sake of peace, you’ll see profit,

Trembling from my info once you see it.

Quickly, you sign the line, but it was just a mock-up.

All the while profits are rolling and tumbling inside of my pockets.

All:

As our oath stands, fight to the last man!

We’re the invincible rogues who won’t run!

Words have become machine guns!

Or our compass to the future, ah!

Three in line! It’s showtime!

History will be made with our style!

It’s between life and death that we rock,

So we’ll leave it down to our instincts, say what!?

It’s tonight, that we end this fight!

Growl out, Hypnosis Mic!

Rhymes shot are well customized!

This sacred sound leaves your synapses fried!

Three in line! It’s showtime!

History will be made with our style!

It’s between life and death that we rock,

So we’ll leave it down to our instincts, say what!?

#hypnosis mic #division rap battle #hypmic

18 notes · View notes

syncogon · 4 years

Text

sad only 480p version this time, and delayed. oh well, temptation too strong, and clips on the weibo looked promising, so let’s go

mjy sighhh i guess he’s just dumb not malicious but man

“the truth isn’t important” glasses shing. oh wow that hair swish tho that was like unnecessarily well animated hahaha

iiiii just want jhx to tell off yy!! i think that’d be great, what a faceslap! also wtf is this thing? iron supplements?? a spray? icy-hot? 铁打损伤喷雾?? god i spent like five minutes trying to mouse-trace those characters and i still don’t know if this is supposed to be significant or if it’s just significant that jhx caught yy doing shady shit

anyway given music / context it seems jhx is annoyed at what yy is doing? so yay friggin finally. “our classes aren’t at nanhua” nice

“xu-da” vs “xu-ge” hmm. anyway jhx don’t fall for the lies. jhx is like sx, annoying and chuuni but probably isn’t as obnoxiously awful as he first appears... probably.... maybe.

goddd sucks that the full version of this op is kinda weird, because i LOVE this op so much like holy crap. jiyi bei yingfu huanxing....

man now im like stressed about the yf at the airport scene. trailer showed an airport. what’s gonna happennn

this exchange about dd feels so weird like it sounds like ctg is trying to explain they’re not in any pre-relationship or smth but maggie is like “i don’t mind” in a way that makes it sound like she wouldn’t mind if they’re together? what??? but whatever

ok i really enjoy this cr/yf dynamic. like i feel like it’s a bit ooc and yf as portrayed here is maybe too far on the acquiescence but also it’s really funny and sparks joy for me so i’ll buy it. i’m happy to see like established relationship stuff i think bc i generally don’t in the stuff i watch. speaking of which i’m super glad that they didn’t make the awful dumb move of trying to insert like Another wack love triangle drama dynamic thing in this like the fans want yecong and tianmai!!

wowwww it’s so nice how supportive cr is being tho like i love to see it!

handholding!! soft!! nice inversion of the earlier part where cr is bandaging his fingers. but like -

WHY DOES SHE HAVE MARKS/CALLUSES ON HER THUMB AND NOT HER PINKY??? like ok i have not played ukelele but i sure have my own share of stringed instrument finger calluses and you don’t?? press on the string with your thumb???

still, they’re trying, it’s a cute detail, i appreciate it. i liked that one wwgk review i watched yesterday that pointed out s1 was like a coming of age story disguised as a music story, whereas s2 is like a real music story....

wait this is incredibly cute wtf. oh my god.

YF SIGHED/FACEPALMED AT THAT? COME ON!! WTF THAT’S SO RUDE? THAT WAS ACTUALLY LIKE PRETTY GOOD?? AND SHE DID THIS JUST FOR YOU? like maybe not performance ready but bro she’s learned for two days!! also holy shit the strumming animation is really good for smth like this im impressed! that reminds me of the like actually legit violin animation they showed in the trailer yo im so ready

like i totally understand the frustration (damn, maggie’s face... 3 free performances? really?) but also i feel SO BAD FOR CR HERE this is so awkward oh my godddd at least ctg like tries to apologize to her (and cr’s reaction to this whole thing is also v solid, good for her) but still like damn

aww ahh man im glad maggie still like! supports encourages cr here! that’s also char dev being able to like get past her own complicated emotions at least for this sort of gesture

awwww i also like seeing maggie’s coping, the happiness philosophy i always thought that was super interesting. she’s a great char! and i think running is good

animators animate a girl running normally challenge

oh nice you have to walk a bit after sprinting, good

the train track scenes are so pretty wahhh

does... does the track just end there? what

the ~significance~ of maggie now sharing this piece of her that used to be a yf thing, with ctg

also excellent bgm - oh omg it’s og soul link remix!!!

“i don’t want you to go”

MY GOD HE’S FINALLY MAKING A REAL MOVE. and one based in real friendship. GOD FUCKING FINALLY CTG AAAAAA she’s cryyying man this exchange is also pretty cute ngl

i can’t believe they figured this out a full 4 episodes before the finale

this is so pretty here wahhhhhh i wanna ss the whole thing in 1080p

awhhhhhh

they never released pink twilight shanghai!! i want this ver!!!

aww yayyy open still cheering her on - YF BE NICE TO YOUR GF COME ON

haha this is like reverse of cr tutoring him - WAIT YEAH YF YOU WERE A SHITTY ASS STUDENT COMPARED TO HER BE EXTRA NICE

also remixed dream i dig it! sounds like new lyrics?

julliard hahahaha

dong dong goddess

HAHAHA did dd just steal ctg’s fries

ctg: expressing some deep thoughts

me: just watching dd

“forever confident, forever happy”

wait sooooooo are they a thing now or what did that count as a confession

“and qing’er is finally here” WHAT’S THE TEAAAAA WE STILL DON’T REALLY KNOW

“im a guitarist this is fine” YOU GO DD I LOVE YOU

BEACH EPISODE BEACH EPISODE BEACH EPISODE

omg oyzq. you’d think they were trying to extort a confession from him. what the hell is this instrument he said what is a xiao 箫. A WOODEN FLUTE? YOOO THAT’S COOL my god PLEASE let us get some kickass trad/modern fusion music im so ready

“i trust ouyang” ahhh double char surnames are cool

HAHAHAHAHHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHA WHAT THE FUCK

“because i’m about to have surgery on my knee” REALLY? REALLY? IS THIS REALLY HOW YOU’RE GOING TO JUSTIFY ALL THIS? FOLKS I AM LOSING MY SHIT I HAVEN’T LAUGHED OUT LOUD LIKE THIS IN SO LONG

ok this is interesting tho he’s not a dick for the hell of it it’s out of desperation or smth. but like half a year, oh no, what a horror. (i’m fresh out of hb feels ok you shaddap // tho i can also imagine the knife, like in lotus bloom, where they didn’t think szp’s injury was permanent). tho i do also like the “then we’ll be seniors we won’t have time to perform” but also that’s just a reminder that all of these ppl are like frigging 16 year olds and i still cannot take this seriously

i like “i didn’t expect, that i couldn’t give you the confidence to win”. god im so glad this confrontation is happening. man this feels like a wrap up already are they really spending all 3 last episodes on the competition? what’s the story gonna be?

feel like he’d be less ugly with hairstyle that looked more consistently like this. anyway sucks that both of them are so ugly otherwise there’s some nice sun/moon (+stars?) imagery you can get going here

GROUP CHAT GROUP CHAT GROUP CHAT

pretty! i wanna save this hq

it’s this bgm!!! godd i just want this track so bad

an empty beach?? in china near shanghai???

anyway ahhh it’s the iconic beach shot! i like how the promo ver cuts out dd lmfao

wow nine episodes in and cookie finally gets a character moment??? cookieeeeeeee i missed you

ok i can’t ship them he calls her shifu but also THIS IS SUCH A CUTE FRIENDSHIP calling every day 10 minutes?? wow!! i love dongdong and i love cookie. also this hits different in covid times “no one says that we can’t be friends because of distance”

oh i guess they are pushing this as a ship. meh.

wahhhhh. need this hq then i have more propic material.

HE HAS COVID

ah lang is VIBING oh to be the ah lang of my own life. parasurfing. walking into poles.

wow this is so modern! the red bag thing! wow i do love this show flexing the modern-ness

this is the mercedes benz arena im SURE of it ahhhh holy crap this crowd. oh to be in a crowd without mask

IT’S THIS DUDE AGAIN like the trailer spoiled this but if i found out this right here right now i would’ve lost my shit my god hahhaah

im like torn about how i feel about cr’s dress like idk if it fits her well even if it’s pretty

oh im scared i hope this doesn’t become embarrassing

OMG THEY INCLUDED PENCIL SKETCH OF THAT S1 SCENE. HAHAHA. char growth yayyyyy

ok anyway im happy!! spent like an hour watching this or something lmao but good times!! much better than last ep HAHA yayyy im so glad we’re finally at the comp and lots of these little things have been tied up now im ready for new song drops!!!

#music up #mine #synco talks

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thebargainingchip · 5 years

Text

Blood Colors - Chapter 14

-Masterlist

Pairing: Roan x Reader

Warnings: None

A/n: It’s been a long while, but here we are. Little bit of a filler chapter

Previous Chapter

Chapter 1

You sit up suddenly from the bed where you had fallen asleep not remembering the rousing thought that brought you out of your sleep but still feeling the panic of it. Roan is nowhere to be seen, you cringe at the thought that people will talk the moment you walk out of the King’s room after leaving your quarters vacated for the night. The blanket and ruffled cushions on the couch in the corner gives you the idea that Roan had avoided the bed altogether, not add to your embarrassment further. You linger in the room afraid to step out in the hallway and honestly knowing you won't be able to look Roan in the eyes. This could cost him, and it was all because of your carelessness.

A little ashamed, you walked to the only other place you could think Roan would be, ready to apologize. Roan was in the throne room as you expected with Echo, clearly in a heated discussion. "There you are," Roan said, seemingly glad to find a distraction from the argument.

"Am I interrupting?" All thought of your earlier embarrassment forgotten

"Well, it depends-" Echo started but was quickly interrupted by Roan.

"Echo, I have heard enough," Roan spoke firmly, Echo quickly shutting up despite the discontent on her face.

"What's going on?" You asked.

"I need you to accompany me on a small outride,"

"An outride?" You questioned, seriously amused. "What's next? Picnic in the meadows?" Roan wasn't too happy with your sarcasm. "What?"

"Meet me in the stables in an hour." Roan left.

"Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed" You huffed when Roan had gone.

"Maybe because someone else was sleeping in it?" Echo suggested almost innocently.

You only gave her a meaningful glare.

Finally, after quite the wait you spotted Roan in the courtyard heading towards the stables. Peculiarly, four horses had been saddled but you dismissed it as being for guards until you saw the young women walking beside the King. She was clearly Azgeda with her facial markings on her brow bones and temples, an elegant pattern that drifted of into her shaven sides as far back as her ears. The top of her hair was braided into an intricate tangle of hair that hanged over her shoulder. Her fine fair face gave nothing away by the nature of her talent except for the twin swords that hanged at her sides, you could be sure they were not just for show.

"Nymph, this is (y/n), a warrior from my guard."Roan introduced. "(Y/n) this is the lady Nymph, her father is the Lord Gaz who sits on my war council." You simply nodded and watched trying to figure out what this was and what she was of Roan. When the introductions had finished, you all clambered into the saddle.

The fourth horse was saddled for the man who seemed to be the lady's guard-man, but you both regarded each other with a wary glance as you fell in beside each other, giving some distance to the two.

Your mouth had gone tight, you knew exactly what this was and it almost angered you to the core. Roan had asked you to be his chaperone, his baby sitter while he went on a play date with whoever this chick was. There was a sort of acquaintance between the two that was furthermore infuriating and then there was the matter of casual conversation with giggles and laughter that irked you to no end.

You were set on edge, your stomach had a constant flutter of nervousness, you still had Aleksondria to deal with. But it was more than that, looking at Roan and this Nymph it stirred something you've felt when watched those men burn, heartsore was the only way to describe what you felt. It had to have been only because this might mean the King's attention would be divided, like now.

Thankfully, Roan kept the route short. But you had some words to share with him and your mind was running over how you would say it. You watched Roan say goodbye and then he motioned for you to follow him which you did. Echo was waiting for you in Roan's chambers when you returned.

"Say it and be done with it." Roan bode you both.

"We have much more important matters to tackle, matters pertaining to your life, what are you trying to accomplish? Trying to find someone you can hump at night?" You stated. Echo couldn't help but snort and maybe you were a little harsh.

"I know this was untimely, in truth I had set this date long ago and unfortunately I had forgotten to change it. My claim to the throne is weak which means I need to secure it with a queen by my side and an heir. You know this. I thought at least I'd have your respect and helpful input in the matter."

"I understand this is part of your royal duties or whatever but don't you think we should first ensure that you stay alive and we can only do this if we do something about Aleksondria." You tried to keep your anger in check.

"She has a point, Roan." Echo agreed.

"Which is why we will discuss it after this argument. Unfortunately, this will continue for six more days." Roan said

"Six days?"You were shocked.

"Five suitors for five days, plus the betrothal ceremony. That's Azgeda tradition." Echo added.

Silence followed as you processed this, clearly angry as you swiped your tongue across your teeth and took a deep breath to contain your anger.

"Fine. What is to be done about Aleksondria?"

"We have to watch her, we need her to make a mistake before we can convict her of anything otherwise the court will question my decision if I punish or execute her," Roan answered. "That's not the worst of it." Roan said and plucked a letter from the table "This came early in the morning, he should be almost here by now." He handed you the letter as you tried to read on his face who 'he' was.

Though significantly injured, I survived and I am ready to return to court. You scanned the letter and then almost dreaded looking at the signature. ' Nire.'

"I bashed open his skull, how could he still be alive?"

"We don't know. Because he was nobleman we had to send his body back to his family, someone must have discovered he was still breathing." Roan said. You lean on the closest thing to you, the chair to the desk, you wish you had checked if he had a pulse. "At most, he's a day out, we will be receiving him by tomorrow morning and he will answer for his crimes."

"He knows he will be confronted about what he did, punished for what he did, why would he come back? Unless he has some ulterior motive." Echo pointed out.

"Meaning that if we accuse him, we would be playing right into his hands." You sighed, glancing at both Roan and Echo.

"It would be better, in that case, to hold off on it, at least until we know." Roan agreed.

"In other matters, I need you to please entertain Lady Nymph, show her the castle, maybe venture into town with her," Roan asked. You were about to protest when Roan cut you off just as you opened your mouth. "I need your opinion of her." You nodded, you turned on your heel to leave. "Echo, I have an errand for you." You heard him say as you left.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

"King Roan takes pride in his men and he had every right to, they are some of the best and fearless fighters." You said as you overlooked the courtyard.

"Em jos chich op emo sleng. (She only speaks their language)." Nymph's guard noted.

"Ai sen klin yo (I understand you)." You pointed out before the lady Nymph can answer, he looked a little shocked.

"We shouldn't be so judgmental after all Jus Gona was first Skaikru." The Lady Nymph came to your defence as the man in her service clamped his mouth tight and glared at you. "Jus Gona, I would love to visit the village, I'll meet you at the gate."

"Lady Nymph, I know the king suggested it but I would advise against it, the unrest since the battle has been brewing." You explained. The last thing you would want is to be caught in a sticky situation.

"Are you suggesting that I can't do my job?" The guard asked, clearly this one didn't like you.

"No, I just-"

"The Jus Gona just means that she would need extra help, it is as dangerous as she suggests and we must all be extra careful." A voice said from behind you in an accent you couldn't quite place. You turned to face the man who had spoken, a little lost for words.

"Good, then we shall meet you at the gate after lunch." The lady Nymph said.

"Who the hell are you?" You questioned when they had gone.

"Cedree, Echo's second." He offered you.

"Where's Echo then?"

"Well I would say, right there," He glanced past you over your shoulder, you turned and saw Echo saddling her horse.

You walked closer at a brisk pace, "Where the hell are you going?" She was clearly dressed to leave, a thick cloak about her shoulders and fully stuffed saddlebags. Echo gave you a distasteful look and continued to tighten the girth.

"None of your business, Jus Gona." When she was done she climbed into the saddle.

"So I'm just supposed to deal with this whole situation on my own."

"Well, you could ask me." A voice said from behind you. You glanced behind you, Cedree had, of course, followed you.

"There you have it."

"What? No, Echo you can't just-" But she was trotting away before you could finish your sentence.

"So what exactly is the situation we are dealing with?" He questioned, you turned to him.

"You don't sound Azgeda." You observed

"You don't either." It was a fair point. He flashed an annoying smile again when you didn't respond.

"Wipe that stupid thing off your face."

"This is my normal face." He answered.

"Why did you do that earlier?"

"Whatever Lady Nymph wants, we need to grant it to her." You clearly weren't at all persuaded by that. "Believe me, Jus Hainofi, you don't want to make an enemy of her."

"Fine. I have some things to do before we leave." You turned to walk away, but Cedree was quick to grab your elbow.

"Not so fast, sweetheart, I'll need some sort of favour in return."

"What do you mean 'favour'?" You asked, he shrugged his shoulders.

"Don't worry, it won't be murder or anything." You couldn't read through his cocky grin but you accepted anyway, your brain already set on your next task.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

You had an hour or so before you had to be at the gate, which means you had ample time to find Izobel. You should have searched for her long ago to apologise but your shame mixed with the fear was enough to drive you to complete avoidance, to your luck, she had not returned since that night when you had so Royaly screwed everything.

Despite the time that you had spent trying to research the marks on your back, you were still not clued up.

You had asked around for Izobel but no one seemed to know where she was, or if she had left, the only thing you could find out was where here living quatres is or was, you would find out soon. The Servant's living quatres were behind the palace in its own little structure and when you reached the door with the symbol you had written down, you knocked. You waited but no one answered, and knocked again but there was still no reply. So you tried to take the initiative, you pulled on the door handle, expecting it to be locked but it twisted easily the door sliding open. The first thing that hit you was the smell and you gagged, you knew this smell, it was death. Covering your mouth you didn't feel the need to call for Izobel, hidden behind the bed, was the body.

Flies were everywhere, and the body was an unnatural red, the stomach bloated. She was almost not recognisable but you could make out some main features. Well, you had found her, just not maybe in this exact state. The floor beneath her was spattered with blood, you doubted that this was an accident.

You told Roan about it immediately when you went back to the Palace, finding him in his rooms as always. "How did you know to look for her?" Was the first thing he asked.

"We had a little argument. She saw the marking son my back and wanted to tell someone, I, on the other hand, did not want her to tell anyone because I still don't know what it means." Roan nodded.

"Let's talk about it later tonight, I'll send someone to clean up this mess but I'm thinking she told someone and they didn't want to get out so they killed her. We need to keep this to ourselves tonight."

"One last thing, can I trust Cedree?" You asked.

"Echo's second. Echo chose him for a reason, don't underestimate him, he can be a powerful ally although his not much liked by others due to him not being born Azgeda." Roan said, you nodded and left.

When you reached the gate Cedree was already waiting. "What? Were you napping?" He questioned.

"I'm not late." You scoffed.

"You're not on time." He pointed out and you simply rolled your eyes. This was going to be one long stroll. Your responsibilities arrived not long after and without much delay you went on your way. Cedree was a good guide, he pointed out some things worth noting while you kept silent and kept your eyes on the streets. Lady Nymph took her time to browse through the selections that the vendors had while Cedree helped her in her decisions.

"Ai nou wich in you (I don't trust you)." Her guard whispered to you.

"Ai nou gifa in (I don't care)." You answered pacing along slowly. as you watched the street, people were beginning to stare.

It was almost like you first few days in Redak when a group of people came to stand closer and the first thing that Lady Nymph's dumbass guards did was draw his sword "Set raun weron yu ste kamp (Stay where you are)!" He said stepping closer to his charge.

"Mokswoma, chil yu daun (Worm, stand down)!" You snapped at him.

"Osir gaf em Fraga (We want the murderer)." One of the men in the crowd said. The mood had shifted since the idiot had drawn his sword.

"You protect her, let me deal with this," Cedree said, curious to see him at work you allowed it. "Dison laik fok op. Chil yu duan. (This is a mistake. Stand down.)" Cedree announced.

"Veida! Fraga! Notrona! Frag emo op. (Invaders! Murderer! Traitors! Kill them.)" The leader announced. They started charging, there must have been about ten to fifteen people as you stuck close to your charge.

Cedree was a quick mover slicing through the people who came to close, barley a few slipped past who you could easily takedown. What you didn't expect was the Vendor to step forward from behind her stall, knife in hand, Nymph's guard was her first target and when she cam for Nymph you ripped her out of the way and killed the woman. Nymph cried out for the man her service but you didn't have time to tend to him as he choked on his own blood, instead you focused on the two men running to you, you parried one attack killed the other and before you could strike down the man remaining Cedree stapped him through the head." You could feel the droplets of blood spray onto your face as he collapsed.

"We need to get her safely back before it inspires any more treason." The streets were empty now, everyone had fled the scene not wanting to be caught up in the battle but you had no doubt more people were lurking in alleyways waiting to attack.

"We can't just leave him," Nymph said.

"He's dead." You said roughly grabbing her by the shoulder, you didn't have time to lay it to her gently as you hauled her along when you started through the streets back.

Noticing the chaos you were soon accompanied by guards back to the palace, and the way back went smoother with the extra company.

Next Chapter

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#Roan #roan fluff #king roan #roan kom azgeda #roan of azgeda #roan x reader #The 100 #roan x you

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reno2ndgun · 4 years

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1 Rufus frowned. “You were injured this morning and haven’t taken anything this whole time?” He was suspicious, and mildly concerned, but he also trusted his Turks to know their limits. Still… “Only one more drink, Reno. With the hush puppies. No getting drunk. It impedes healing.” Shaking his head, Rufus held back the comment that, in truth, he would never think of Reno as trash at all. He waited until the cheeky Turk had gotten his little rant out of his system.

He had no idea what ‘fee fees’ were, but whatever amusement he felt, he wasn’t willing to display it yet. He had to impress the seriousness of this onto Reno. "As much as I'd enjoy a report of you dousing yourself with coffee, there is a substantial difference between a paper cut and a *fracture* that takes you off of field work for the time being." He paused, considering his next words carefully. "If it's serious enough to mention, I want details. It prevents me from…" *worrying*, "wondering."

Rufus blinked in surprise. He was more than a little taken aback by Reno not only taking his offer of a sleepover seriously, but accepting it *tonight*. Then again, this was Reno. Rufus had always admired how the man seemed to live in the moment; had been fairly envious of it at times. Perhaps it was time to take a page from his book. Slowly pouring a second glass of wine, his mind flashed through the options. He could shuffle his schedule around easily enough.

Tseng had been all but begging him, in his own way, to take an evening off. As for the sleeping arrangements—he acknowledged his gut response and considered the options carefully in its wake. "I do have a fairly soft couch, but I'm concerned you could hurt yourself worse if you forget where you are. It happens to be located in front of a table that’s exactly at shin height. You are welcome to share my bed. It’s big enough for two.” And he missed just having another’s presence. “Up to you.”

“Well I did have something this morning, it just wasn’t pain killers, it was Rude’s tequila. We’d both been really excited about it all week yo. His family sent it from their brewery. They make good stuff!” He speaks with no small amount of cheek. It’s no secret Reno drinks like a pirate on occasion when he doesn’t have work to do. Good thing he’s almost always got some work to do. Reno chortles a laugh as his back arches, the hem of his shirt lifting to bare pale belly as his arms stretch up over his head. “Not True! I stay in bed a lot more when I’m drunk than when I’m not. I tend to fall asleep after tipsy.” He stands to take op the cutlery and the plates to clean everything and take it to the sinks. As he stands at the sink, he does so like a flamingo, one leg lifted off the ground entirely. “Honestly I just....Didn’t want to go to the hospital assigned on my insurance. Last time I was there one of the nurses was handsy. I didn’t want to tell anyone. Turks aren’t supposed to be bothered by that kinda shit you know yo? I also didn’t want special treatment and there were WAY more nurses looking after me than there needed to be. So Tseng let me come back if I promised to stay out of the field and off the training mats.” Quick hands scrubbed the dishes clean of food and rinsed them before setting everything in the dishwasher. He’d noticed Rufus pause before the word ‘wondering’ and smirked. Hmm...What was the man actually thinking? Rufus was the sort to know exactly what he wanted to say, and did so brazenly and with eloquence whether it was well received or not. Something that gave Rufus ShinRa pause was something to think about over the evening... “I don’t mind sharing a bed. Keeps things Cozy yo.” Reno limped slightly back to his drink and sipped the last of it down before pouring himself one more glass. He gently shakes the glass at Rufus, grin playful. “Last glass, happy? Contrary to Tseng’s belief I do not in fact have a drinking problem. I open my mouth, and I drink it!” He replaced the bottle in the cupboard and moved to look over the paperwork on Rufus’s desk, his drink in hand. “So whatcha work’n on yo? Anything I can help with or are ya done for the day?”

#Anonymous #Anon Rufus: In Charge #Reno Nix replies

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blaze8403 · 5 years

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Tenjou Tenge Theory

Be it the Japanese anime culture or A way of visual story telling be it also A lot of Honesty in much of it be you find everybody in Japan know what i mean like amen in holy name everybody in Japanese Culture and through out the Area of Euroasia be it yes Martial Arts Club exist ( not juken or joking but Ken maybe Kendo ( never kendoll ) but yes it is serious in Japan it’s not just schools many are cool never loco like looks not skool but yes many are from the same school or discipline or they are not be it yes it is more to Martial Arts then meets the Eye our Knowledge our belief or our knowingness and understanding of this as this ish hits like sugar honey iced tea as to say the Martial Science not the Marital Science don’t at all be confused marriage is serious like Martial Law or Marital Law and even spelling if it be marriage is serious to martial arts Sword Arts and Word Arts are serious to A Martial Artist be it the spelling of Art and Arts like Star and Arts is serious like rats type who said it not Splinter and Ninja Turtle maybe like Life yes be it Turtles are reptile life like any other life and yes A rat a Rodent is too be it also Chinese Zodiac be it so then yes the spelling Heart and Earth like TH and my Initial like T.Hawkins like T.Hawk or Hawkins Terry be it first and last like Art is A three letter word and so is war and no much of words or so be it so and full of sword like i must filled words to say or speak when emotion or feeling peak maybe none when calm and no words whisper even silently be it why Art is serious to Martial Artist like ist or ism no not Alcoholism maybe Religious ism’s and not sim and without sin be it Alchemy and my skills in magic or just being awakened ( like sit or sim ) like magick be it sparring or combat and so like Kombat maybe no like C letter three letter K is letter eleven i know Ter in Letter and Terry like Teri or Ter ri like in Japanese Hawkins or Hokinsu be it TZU like Sun Tzu and the Art of War like Raw truth Aw in War like Hawkins and Root Beer like Sun or Moon and Chakra’s Too like Crown to Root Root to Crown like yes i know about this too be it Hokinzu Martial Artist of the Sword Arts or of Sword Arts sword or Ken Discipline like Peros Dragonus Kami Aisuru Ikigami Shinigami like magi and call it magic be it magick like maji no Gaming and yes if i am game like sure not mega million question or mega man type of day like spell mage be it mage or sage and game or ages not so much sega but yes and words like homophones and anagrams be it palindromes if so evol or love be it no not on velodrome in Baltimore like more or less spell more and spell Rome be it Home or Hope and the Pope like Ihopp or Ihop and Hopi like Hoping be it Hopkins and Not Hawkins like op in boop and operation be it Hi not Hi pop if IHop Hopkins for Breakfast Night or Day like no not A Shift like Subway map and maybe New York like North not South and A City Hall Drift and not Tokyo Drift or Kyoto if so be it shift straight like past shaft not John Shaft Jr. may be an FBI cyber security expert but Cyber like Cypher or Cipher and you dealing with A Dai Gensui Philosopher like Multi Professional soy yo not yo soy like je suis no ( jesus or move like not movie je suis ) but martial arts has been much of my up bringing and studies since i could walk or talk about and weapons to yes i interest in weapons arts martial artist have interest or skill in weapons if so both ( live steel and live blade ) be it chakra 7 or more be it yes the Chakra System exist and does it’s power also as does Kundalini and energy Reiki Reiatsu (霊圧, Spiritual Pressure) Reishi (霊子, Spirit Particles) Reiryoku (霊力, Spiritual Power) as these words and meaning exist chi ki aura spiritual pressure and such things exist attacks that seem super natural super human exist they do secret and forbidden arts left hidden do exist like yes Jutsu do exist our general belief in Knowledge and Knowingness exist Belief in our ways legend myth Religion tales of tells told and retold exist cursed blades exist like do Holy blades or Blessed Blades and sword like words of Blessing bestowed not evil or vile but live blade and yes it’s power be it special in words and the sword be it more to me then what people know like my blade thy sword and my love for those those of mine and those of old priceless be it of ages old like Holy Maxine not Maxies like Holy or Tentetsutou Kusanagi-no-Tsurugi (草薙の剣) or any other be it of marital art and Discipline and skills if so be it ADK Angel Dragon Knights Religious Marital Martial Arts Organization and Society Hetero-marital rights be it yes man and woman man and women in case be husband and wife and together man and woman create life like yin and yang those things are balance to us like God a male and A Goddess a female God to all Janist who convert to following Janism and way True Religion Circle Philosophy Science Religion and Politics to a level understanding the TAO AND DAO Janism and Actual Religion Created of Founded by me like i would Take Credit for creating Taoism but i can credit who had in thank you to my influence in my own works be it Tao the Way and Dao be it the Path ( Yakaza the Extreme Path ) yes Jujanjitsu is not Janism but surely January to June as June to January even in December and in March or any other month everything i protected and intend as i intended to protect be it protected be it people lives woman or women be it weapons or sword county country or continent be it with words or sword maybe blade or blaze and to shine brilliantly effortlessly just the Tenjou Tenge Anime and Tenge Tenjou Theory like Yes Toujour Pret and Tenjou Tenge - Titled Tenjou Tenge Theory

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stevenuniversallyreviews · 5 years

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Episode 122: Tiger Philanthropist

“It’s like the sequel no one asked for.”

Adventure Time is technically a serial, but rather than one continuous story it’s a hodgepodge of multiple meandering plots that get checked up on at random over the course of its 283-episode run. For instance, minor character Maja the Sky Witch was introduced in Episode 133 (Sky Witch), yelling at the end that she’s planning “something big,” and we got that follow-up a full year later in Episode 166 (Something Big; let it not be said that these episodes aren’t named well). Virtually no mention of Maja was made between these episodes, but Something Big served as a direct sequel, beginning in the middle of a huge battle as if we knew it was coming, and we just went with it. That, for better and worse, is the spirit of Adventure Time's long-term structure. Episodes can be about any character in its vast world, and we jump around so much that it feels like anything could happen.

Steven Universe takes a different approach, aided by a singular focus on Steven's point of view. It also has distant sequel episodes, but it’s easier to keep track of these connected stories because of a more unified through-line. I mentioned in The New Crystal Gems that I’d like to see more character interactions that are restricted by this focus (give us an episode about Peridot making avant-garde metal-powered multi-instrumental music with Sour Cream, you cowards), but it’s still generally a positive from a plotting standpoint to keep things Steven-centric.

For the most part, I’m a huge fan of distant sequel episodes in both Adventure Time and Steven Universe despite them being such different beasts. But while the random “hey remember this storyline?” in media res variant works well in a zany show that bounces from plot to plot, Tiger Philanthropist is proof that this type of sequel doesn’t work quite as well on a show with a more traditional structure.

The premise of Tiger Philanthropist hinges on the idea that Steven and Amethyst have been wrestling this whole time. But, as we might see in an Adventure Time sequel episode, we’ve gotten zero references to this subplot between the first and second episode of the story. We never see Steven and Amethyst coming back from a gig. We never hear them talking about it in passing. We never see the tiger mask lying around to indicate recent use. The Brothers Construction and Good-Looking Gang even feel like Adventure Time one-off characters, as they’re for some reason never seen outside of a wrestling context despite Steven Universe otherwise doing pretty well at building a sense of reliable locals and background characters.

Bear in mind that we just had a whole arc about Amethyst’s inferiority complex in terms of physical ability, and at no point did the coping mechanism that she’s apparently been using this whole time come up. The thrust of Tiger Philanthropist is that she’s moved on from the need to use wrestling as an outlet for her issues, but when we haven’t even thought about Tiger Millionaire outside of a few Purple Puma cameos and maybe a poster or two early in our first season, it strains credibility to be told that she still was using wrestling as an outlet for her issues. I’m too focused on the hamfisted retconning to get invested in this story. It’s as if we got an episode about Garnet deciding to stop going to the arcade and Steven is bummed because oh by the way we forgot to mention it but she and Steven have been playing co-op Meat Beat Mania every Thursday since Arcade Mania and it’s a major part of their relationship.

Steven Universe is at its weakest when the crew seemingly forgets key plot points: episodes like House Guest forget a character’s established personality, episodes like Sadie’s Song forget Steven’s development from bratty to empathetic, and both Malachite and Bismuth go unmentioned for huge swaths of the show during times when they would’ve been relevant to discuss or feature. Underground wrestling might be less pivotal than the long-term bubbling of an old friend, it’s just as frustrating for the thread to be completely ignored until it becomes relevant again. Because it’s not like the show always does this: look at Connie’s training, which has focus episodes here and there but is also background noise in other episodes to let it feel like a consistent part of her life. Mindful Education would’ve been a disaster if Connie started training in Sworn to the Sword and then we didn’t mention it at all until she accidentally tossed a classmate.

And really, imagine if at least one of the episodes in Amethyst’s big Act II arc was in the ring. We easily could’ve had Tiger Millionaire accidentally eclipsing Purple Puma as a catalyst for her self-doubt (among many other possibilities that this crew could conceive better than I) and it would’ve made Tiger Philanthropist feel so much better. But I can’t write about that, because that’s not what happened.

What sucks is that I love Tiger Millionaire and am all for more wrestling. Despite my snotty header quote choice about unwanted sequels, I was super excited for Tiger Philanthropist, and that glorious music brought me right back into the zone as the episode began. But the wind went right out of my sails when it became clear that we’re to believe Tiger Millionaire and Purple Puma are fixtures of the wrestling scene, and that it’s an activity that’s super important to Steven as a way of bonding with Amethyst.

And there are plot elements here that, in an episode with better context, would get a chance to shine. In a world where we knew Amethyst and Steven were wrestling for around two years, this would’ve been a pretty emotional conclusion to a relationship that began in the show’s early days (not that Steven and Amethyst would stop hanging out, but it’s always bittersweet when an important phase of your life is over). It would’ve served as a great acknowledgment of how Amethyst has moved on with her life if we saw the part of her life she was moving on from. We could’ve felt Steven’s sense of loss, and the surge of relief when Purple Puma returns for one last ride. If you transported this exact episode into a series that built up to it in any way, it would be a classic. But we aren’t watching that series.

It’s a little fun that I’m unsatisfied with a follow-up where an entertainer reacts to a fan being unsatisfied with a follow-up. Much like Season 2′s Mombo Combo, two thematically linked episodes about moms separating the Week of Sardonyx from Peridemption, we get two episodes in a row about fan interaction to buffer Steven’s long day in space from the continuation of his mother issues culminating in another trip to space. Unfortunately I can’t think of as good a name for Rocknaldo and Tiger Philanthropist as a unit as “Mombo Combo” (the Fandom Menace?) but nobody’s perfect.

Lars plays a fascinating role here, because the easy option would be making him an entitled fan a la Ronaldo who wants things to go just the way he likes. And to be clear, Lars does want things to go a certain way. But he’s not dictating the terms or saying he needs Tiger Millionaire to act exactly how he wants, he’s just frustrated by a new development that seems out of step with his favorite wrestler. Even when asked directly about what he'd like to happen, Lars doesn’t know, because he hasn’t confused his fandom with the notion that he gets to dictate the specifics about the thing he likes.

(I try to be the same way, but I also definitely wrote a spiel about how Tiger Millionaire and Purple Puma should’ve been present during Amethyst’s latest arc like five paragraphs ago. Again, nobody’s perfect.)

It helps that Lars doesn’t understand that Steven is Tiger Millionaire (a repeat gag that I’d probably find funnier if I felt more charitable about the episode), so he’s unaware that he’s speaking with the creator of the content he enjoys; perhaps he’d be singing a different tune if he knew the truth. But as it is, we get a surprisingly generous interpretation of a demanding fan, allowing us to see the ethos behind Lars’s disappointment instead of writing him off as an entitled fanboy with impossible expectations. The timing of Tiger Philanthropist fits perfectly with Lars’s imminent moment in the sun, as he’s still prickly but has enough layers by now that I don’t roll my eyes too hard when he up and calls himself complex.

I don’t talk about the visuals of this show as much as I should, considering how creative the settings and weird alien vehicles and structures can get. But it bears mentioning that, aside from some weird conspicuous computer graphics for falling money, Tiger Philanthropist looks great. The stylized snapshots provide moments of goofy flair to the mix, and the heightened drama of the ring leads to some excellent lighting that shadows Steven’s face as a hooded stranger and makes Purple Puma look like an honest-to-goodness superhero. We get fun choreography and costumes befitting a wrestling episode, and some premium character expressions throughout.

And it’s funny! Colton Dunn remains a worthy successor to Sinbad, giving us not one but two great gags of Mr. Smiley joyfully defining a word to the audience (both in the ring and at home); explaining “philanthropist” is funny enough on its own for how cheesy it is, but I’m really tickled that he gives the same weight to “sea wasp.” Really, this episode has so much going for it if the central idea wasn’t such a misfire.

As you may have guessed by this review, I obviously think it’s valid to criticize aspects of art that you don’t like. So in theory, it sounds awesome to have artists respond to such criticism to make a product that you as a fan enjoy more. But we now live in an age where absolute garbage like CinemaSins allows people to pretend that productive criticism is just nitpicks, an inability or refusal to understand basic nuance, and frankly bigoted ideas about what certain people are capable of doing (if you have half an hour to spare, Everything Wrong About Everything Wrong About Civil War delightfully gets into all three!). It’s a double-edged sword, because creators listening to fans perhaps isn’t inherently bad, but a desperation to fill in “plot holes” at the expense of good storytelling is detrimental to modern storytelling (if you have another half an hour to spare, watch Lindsay Ellis’s take on Beauty and the Beast for more on this; this is a review with homework!). And this is on top of the potential of harassment covered in Rocknaldo, which not even the lousiest content creator deserves.

Tiger Philanthropist isn’t about bad faith criticism, as Lars’s views are from a sincere place, but its message of not treating fans like bosses is a valid response to fandoms who want more and more influence over the direction of an artist’s work. Which could’ve veered towards self-importance or hackneyed nods to the camera, so I appreciate that I never feel pulled out of this element of the story. We never shift from a regular episode of the show to a screed from the animators, and again, Lars isn’t villainized for not enjoying Tiger Millionaire’s face turn. Combined with Rocknaldo, we can see how important good boundaries between fans and creators can be, both for the well-being of the people involved and the quality of the art being created. Shirt Club gave us a tribute to making art, and the Fandom Menace (it’s growing on me) sees a more experienced team of animators commenting on a specific issue when creating popular art, all while not coming across as bitter or self-congratulatory. If only they’d done it in an episode with more buildup!

Obviously the creation of a big letdown wasn’t the intent of the crew, despite how neat it’d be to demonstrate fan disappointment through a purposefully disappointing episode. Rarely do I feel like effort isn’t made to produce a good episode of Steven Universe, and as seen in its strengths, Tiger Philanthropist isn’t lazy. Which makes it a little more frustrating than if they phoned it in, because we’ve got jokes and visuals and a great message but none of it matters when the conflict they wrote requires a backstory they didn’t have. If you’re gonna make an episode about the end of a continuity, it’s critical for literally any amount of that continuity to be established beyond one wayward story over a hundred episodes ago. As it is, I couldn’t wait for this episode to retire.

We’re the one, we’re the ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR!

Tiger Philanthropist was a huge disappointment, but I wouldn’t consider it bad enough to go on my No Thanks! list. With a different leadup of episodes it would be great, or at least fine; it just suffers from a plot that comes out of nowhere. Context can’t salvage my bottom list, which are episodes I just don’t like period. Still, if I was doing more thorough ranking, it’s probably in my bottom ten.

Top Twenty

Steven and the Stevens

Hit the Diamond

Mirror Gem

Lion 3: Straight to Video

Alone Together

Last One Out of Beach City

The Return

Jailbreak

The Answer

Mindful Education

Sworn to the Sword

Rose’s Scabbard

Earthlings

Mr. Greg

Coach Steven

Giant Woman

Beach City Drift

Winter Forecast

Bismuth

Steven’s Dream

Love ‘em

Laser Light Cannon

Bubble Buddies

Tiger Millionaire

Lion 2: The Movie

Rose’s Room

An Indirect Kiss

Ocean Gem

Space Race

Garnet’s Universe

Warp Tour

The Test

Future Vision

On the Run

Maximum Capacity

Marble Madness

Political Power

Full Disclosure

Joy Ride

Keeping It Together

We Need to Talk

Chille Tid

Cry for Help

Keystone Motel

Catch and Release

When It Rains

Back to the Barn

Steven’s Birthday

It Could’ve Been Great

Message Received

Log Date 7 15 2

Same Old World

The New Lars

Monster Reunion

Alone at Sea

Crack the Whip

Beta

Back to the Moon

Kindergarten Kid

Buddy’s Book

Gem Harvest

Three Gems and a Baby

That Will Be All

The New Crystal Gems

Storm in the Room

Like ‘em

Gem Glow

Frybo

Arcade Mania

So Many Birthdays

Lars and the Cool Kids

Onion Trade

Steven the Sword Fighter

Beach Party

Monster Buddies

Keep Beach City Weird

Watermelon Steven

The Message

Open Book

Story for Steven

Shirt Club

Love Letters

Reformed

Rising Tides, Crashing Tides

Onion Friend

Historical Friction

Friend Ship

Nightmare Hospital

Too Far

Barn Mates

Steven Floats

Drop Beat Dad

Too Short to Ride

Restaurant Wars

Kiki’s Pizza Delivery Service

Greg the Babysitter

Gem Hunt

Steven vs. Amethyst

Bubbled

Adventures in Light Distortion

Gem Heist

The Zoo

Rocknaldo

Enh

Cheeseburger Backpack

Together Breakfast

Cat Fingers

Serious Steven

Steven’s Lion

Joking Victim

Secret Team

Say Uncle

Super Watermelon Island

Gem Drill

Know Your Fusion

Future Boy Zoltron

Tiger Philanthropist

No Thanks!

6. Horror Club 5. Fusion Cuisine 4. House Guest 3. Onion Gang 2. Sadie’s Song 1. Island Adventure

#tiger philanthropist #steven universe #su #steven universally #review

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