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inkedinshadows · 2 months

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Echoes of the Bond

Pairing: Azriel × reader

Summary: part 2 of "A Helping Hand". When mates are reunited, Y/N grows curious about what the mating bond is, causing Azriel's brain to short-circuit.

Warnings: none I guess?

Word count: 3.7k

A Helping Hand (part 1)

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Y/N got out of the tub, wrapping her body in a soft towel.

For the last three weeks, she'd been able to take a bath on her own. Azriel had helped twice after that first time, and even Mor had tried when Azriel wasn't around. But Y/N wasn't comfortable with her there, not as she was with the Shadowsinger. Knowing she couldn't always count on him for something as basic as washing herself, she'd learned – or relearned, actually – how to do it herself. There were still bad days when the first few minutes in the water had her gasping for air, but they were now few and far between. And when they did occur, she usually imagined Azriel's heartbeat beneath her palm, just like the first time, and she'd calm down. She never told him that, though.

Sliding on a dress, she headed out of her room and toward the dining room. She was getting used to living in the House of Wind, almost looking forward to having meals with the Inner Circle. Elain and Nesta were still having a hard time adapting to this new life and refused to leave their rooms, and Y/N would visit them sometimes, but they'd never really been close. Out of the three sisters, Feyre was her friend, and she missed her. Things would be easier if she were back in the Night Court.

When Y/N entered the room, Azriel and Cassian were already there. She offered them a smile as she sat at the table, a plate of her favorite pastries appearing before her as soon as she did. Even after a month in Prythian, she was still trying to wrap her mind around magic. Real magic, right in front of her.

“How are you today?”

Y/N turned to Cassian with a small smile. “I'm feeling better every day.” She glanced at Azriel, who always seemed worried she might be lying about it. “And I haven't had any nightmares in a few days.”

Azriel inclined his head, a barely-there gesture she might have missed if she hadn't grown used to his subtle movements. Ever since he first helped her, she had become keenly aware of his every move.

“That's good,” he replied, his eyes lingering on her for a second longer before he returned his attention to his breakfast.

With Cassian's focus still on her, she picked up one of her pastries as she addressed him again. “And how are your wings?”

“Feeling better every day,” he answered, repeating her words with a mocking smile. He even extended them behind him to demonstrate the truthfulness of his statement. “Biggest wingspan getting back on track, I can tell you that.”

Y/N chuckled. “You have the biggest wingspan?”

“Oh, you bet I do.” Cassian's grin was nothing less than smug. “I could show you exactly how big–”

Azriel's snarl interrupted him. “Watch it, Cassian.”

But Cassian didn't seem particularly bothered. “Why? She asked,” he replied with a shrug. “I was merely offering her a chance to see for her–”

He was cut off by Azriel's low growl. Y/N looked at him, her brow furrowed in confusion at the reaction. She'd never heard such a tone from him before, never seen him so on edge. Glancing from one Illyrian to the other, she realized there might be something she wasn't aware of, or maybe wingspan was just a very sensitive topic for them.

Cassian lifted his hands up in surrender, finally picking up on his brother's rising irritation. “Relax, Az.” He glanced at Y/N, then back at him. “It was just a joke, brother.”

But Azriel still seemed tense, and Y/N reached over to him to place a hand on his arm. “Azriel,” she said gently, “are you alright?”

He’d always been there for her since she’d arrived at the Night Court, and she now wanted to do the same for him, even if she didn’t know what had triggered such a reaction from him.

Those beautiful hazel eyes slid to her hand touching him, then to her face, and he finally relaxed as he gave her a nod. “Yeah… sorry about that,” he murmured, casting an apologetic look in Cassian’s direction, receiving only a dismissive wave of hand in return.

As Y/N pulled back, a few tendrils of Azriel's shadows slithered between her fingers and curled around her wrist. Their master looked at them as if they were disobedient children and Cassian's eyes widened, but she only chuckled.

Shadows lingered in the darkest corners of her room, swirling under furniture or inside cracks as if they were trying to hide. But she knew they were there – she'd first noticed them one day when Azriel had brought her a tray of food, back when hunger was an unknown feeling and she didn't eat. Though neither she nor Azriel ever said anything about it, knowing his shadows were always with her was a comforting thought. But they'd never openly approached her before.

“They seem to like you,” Cassian pointed out, his voice muffled by the food he had just stuffed in his mouth.

Y/N watched the shadows linger around her wrist as a bracelet, a warm feeling sparking in her chest, there and gone as soon as the shadows hurtled back to their master. “I think they’re cute,” she said with a smile, her eyes meeting Azriel’s for a moment before they both looked away. She could have sworn a faint blush crept up his cheeks. It only made her smile grow.

Cassian seemed to notice it too, because he paused mid-bite. His eyes narrowed as he focused first on his brother, then on her, then on Azriel again. And then his jaw almost dropped, his eyes now widened.

Y/N was about to chuckle at the sight, but Azriel was even more serious than usual and just gave Cassian a short nod. She frowned, aware once more that there was some kind of silent conversation going on between the two brothers. But neither of them bothered to enlighten her, and she didn't ask. She was still new to their world, and to their group. They would have told her if it was something they thought she should know, she was sure of it.

They continued to eat their breakfast, though a somewhat tense silence had now settled over them. Azriel kept his eyes on his food while Cassian was miserably failing at hiding his grin as he glanced between the two of them. On her part, Y/N felt like anything she could say would be the wrong thing, so she didn't say anything.

Once they were done eating, she stood up, intent on heading back to her room or maybe stopping at the library Rhys had shown her a few days before. But Cassian called out her name and she stopped in her tracks, turning around in time to notice Azriel's warning look at his brother.

“Would you like to leave the House for a few hours?” Cassian asked her with a smile. “Az and I could show you around Velaris. You said you wanted to see it yesterday.”

“I did,” she confirmed, surprised by the offer.

Azriel was now watching her, more relaxed than a few minutes ago as he waited for her answer. And she didn't even need to think about it.

“I'd really like that, yes.”

“Good!” Cassian almost burst out of his seat and guided her towards the doors that led out onto the balcony, Azriel trailing silently after them. “Then I hope you're not afraid of heights.”

Y/N frowned. “Heights? No, why?”

It was Azriel who answered this time. “The easiest way to reach the city is by flight.” He walked up to her, standing so close that his scent enveloped her, and she had to fight not to close her eyes and breathe it in. “Will you trust me to fly you down?”

She smiled then, soft and warm. “Az, of course I do.” After everything he’d done for her, there was probably nothing she wouldn't trust him with. “You know that.”

A coughing fit drew her attention to Cassian as he tried to suppress a giggle.

“What’s going on with you today?” she asked with a chuckle.

“Oh, nothing,” he snickered. “I'll see you down there.” He extended his wings and with a powerful beat, he shot skyward.

Y/N turned back to Azriel with a raised eyebrow, but he simply shook his head. “Ignore him,” he said, his tone somewhere between amused and annoyed. “He acts like a big child sometimes.”

She chuckled again, but it quickly died when Azriel stepped even closer. He moved slowly, as if he wanted to give her all the time to change her mind and push him away, but she didn't. And then his arms were at her knees and her back, and he effortlessly picked her up and cradled her to his chest.

Her heart skipped a beat and she tried her best not to blush at the proximity, the gentleness he was holding her with. It reminded her of when he'd washed her, every movement careful and studied so as not to startle her. That feeling in her chest came back, but it was more like a gentle tug. Toward what, she didn’t know.

“Are you ready?” His voice was soft, like he didn't want to ruin the moment, but his eyes bore into her and she could only nod, her ability to speak momentarily forgotten.

Next thing she knew, they were airborne. Y/N wrapped her arms around his neck for more support when she realized just how high up in the sky they were, the House of Wind growing smaller behind them. She forced herself to peer at the city below them. And she stopped breathing altogether.

If the view from the House of Wind was beautiful, then there were no words to describe it from right above it. Velaris was sprawled below them, shining in the light of the morning sun, the river flowing through it to the sea, and as they slowly descended towards the city, Y/N could make out people in the streets, the sounds of music and laughter filling her ears.

“It's… so beautiful,” she murmured, her awestruck tone bringing a smile on Azriel’s lips.

“You should see it at night,” he replied, flying around until he spotted Cassian waiting for them. “There's a reason why it's called the City of Starlight.”

“Maybe you could take me flying at night, then.”

She didn't know where the words had come from, why she'd suggested it. Azriel definitely had more important things to do than show her a night view of Velaris. Sleep seemed like a good option, for example. Her cheeks flushed, and she looked away.

But Azriel landed and gently placed her on her feet again, his hands lingering on her waist for a moment before he pulled away. “Maybe I could.” There was no hint of playfulness in his voice. He really meant it.

Before Y/N could answer, Cassian approached and clapped his brother on the shoulder. “There you are! I was starting to think you two would never come down.”

Azriel shot him a glare and simply gestured for them to start walking down the street. Cassian was still speaking, but she wasn’t listening, too busy taking in their surroundings to focus on anything else. She'd never seen a city before – none were left in the human lands – and Velaris was bustling with life. She marveled at every shop, every little corner, every painted house.

They had reached the end of the street, a bridge over the Sidra now in front of them, when both Cassian and Azriel tensed. Y/N turned to them, mouth already open to ask what was wrong, but a small cry of surprise came out instead as Mor suddenly appeared next to them.

“We have to go,” was all she said, her voice firm. She was wearing black leathers like the Illyrians, as if she was ready for a fight.

The three of them exchanged a glance, Y/N even more confused than before. Azriel simply said, “I'll take her to the townhouse,” and scooped her up in his arms once more. She only had time to see Mor grab Cassian's hand and winnow away before they were soaring through the sky again.

“Az, what's going on?” she finally asked, turning her face to look at him.

His unreadable expression only caused her to be even more nervous, yet Azriel didn't answer until he landed on the doorstep of a house and set her down. “It's Feyre.” Her heart jumped at the words. “She's in the Winter Court. We're getting her back.”

The door opened behind them, and Amren appeared. She lifted a brow at the sight of Y/N, probably not expecting her, but she simply looked at Azriel. “Go. Now.”

The Shadowsinger looked at Y/N one last time, gave them a sharp nod, and shot to the skies.

“Come inside, girl.” Amren stepped aside to let her walk by. “Looks like we've got some waiting to do.”

~~~~~~

Waiting must be some kind of torture.

Apparently, Amren didn't know much about Feyre's situation. She only explained that Rhys had spoken mind-to-mind with all of them, saying his mate had left the Spring Court. Other than that, she had no idea if Feyre was fine or hurt.

But Y/N wasn’t worried just about her friend. She was worried about Azriel too, as if he weren't a centuries-old warrior who could definitely look out for himself. Maybe it was just Amren's presence that set her even more on edge. The short female made her nervous, perhaps due to the power that seemed to thrum from her, or the way she seemed to look at her as if she could see into the depths of her soul.

After an hour that felt more like a century, five figures winnowed into the living room. Y/N flinched, then shot to her feet and ran to Feyre, not caring about the dirt that covered her friend as she held her tight. Feyre stumbled back a step, probably caught off guard, but hugged her back a second later.

“Y/N.” She pulled back, scanning her head to toe. “Are you alright?”

Y/N almost laughed at that. She wasn't the one who'd just needed a rescue party. “If I'm alright? Are you alright?”

Feyre nodded, but her attention quickly shifted. “Yeah, I'm… I'm alright.” Her eyes were searching the room, as if looking for something. Or someone, Y/N guessed.

Letting go of her friend, Y/N realized there was another person with them. A red-haired Fae with a mechanical golden eye. She'd seen him before – that day in Hybern. Now that her recollection of those events was clearer, she remembered him claiming Elain was his mate just as she came out of the Cauldron, right before they'd shoved her in.

Cassian, Azriel and Mor were assessing him, as if deciding what to do with him. But she paid little attention to what was being said, focusing instead on the Shadowsinger, searching for any sign of discomfort or – gods forbid – wounds. She sighed in relief when she found none, unsure of why she'd been so worried in the first place.

The conversation halted, and she whirled to see Rhysand appear in the doorway. Feyre sank to her knees, tears in her eyes, and he was immediately there to hold her. “My love,” he whispered, though they all heard it in the silence. “My mate.”

Once again, Y/N felt a slight tug in her chest, and her gaze was drawn to Azriel. She found him already looking at her, but when their eyes met, he seemed to shrink into his shadows like he wanted to disappear. She unconsciously rubbed her chest as she averted her gaze.

“Go find somewhere else to be for a while,” Rhys ordered them.

One by one, they filed out the door and onto the street. Azriel declared he was going to fly her back to the House of Wind, the others announcing they’d be waiting in Amren's apartment until given the order to return to the townhouse. And so Y/N found herself in Azriel's arms for the third time in the span of less than two hours.

Despite her increased heart rate, she felt like a bit of a burden, needing to be carried around by him when he obviously had more pressing matters to take care of. Yet she couldn't deny the safety she felt in his arms while they flew toward the mountain and its house.

“Az,” she said after a couple minutes, “that male you brought back with Feyre–”

He looked down at her. “Lucien?”

Y/N nodded. “That day in Hybern, he… he said Elain was his mate.”

Azriel aimed for one of the balconies of the House of Wind. “What about it?”

“Fey and Rhys are mates as well,” she added, her brow furrowed. The High Lord had referred to her friend as such many times over the last few weeks.

The Shadowsinger landed and set her down, looking at her as if urging her to continue, not sure what she was trying to say. But he seemed to be holding his breath.

Maybe she should just let him go back to the others and keep her questions for later. But instead she asked, “What is a mate?”

Azriel tensed. She thought he might not answer, but then he spoke, his tone carrying a hint of reverence. “Mates are… equals, in every way. It's a very rare bond, but it's so deep and powerful that it's cherished and honored above others. Even marriage.”

Y/N rubbed her chest, the spot where she kept feeling that pull. Azriel cocked his head, noting the movement. She should definitely let him go, yet he made no movement to leave, and she found herself blurting out, “Do you have a mate?”

His shadows stilled their constant swirling around him. Maybe it was rude to ask, or it was a sensitive topic for him. Whatever the reason, she shouldn't–

“I do,” he answered, right as she was about to apologize. “I've found her recently.”

Her heart dropped. She didn't know why the idea of him with a mate bothered her, but that damn feeling in her chest grew stronger, and she had to resist the urge to rub it again.

“How is she?”

Why couldn't she keep her mouth shut, why did she have to keep asking questions? Why did she even care if Azriel had a mate or not? She'd just learnt what that meant anyway. At least her voice sounded soft and genuinely curious, not at all clipped – a small consolation.

“She is… kind, and gentle.” He spoke slowly, his words chosen carefully. But then his eyes softened and his shadows began to move again, a few tendrils stretching out towards her. “She's a lot like you, actually.”

All she took from his answer – what she chose to focus on, anyway – was that Azriel saw her as kind and gentle and that she reminded him of someone as important as his mate. Though it still stung a little, if she had to be honest.

“Well,” she replied, her tone lighter as she took a step back. She smiled up at him. “She's lucky to have you, Az.”

She meant it. If he was even just half as sweet and caring with his mate as he'd been with her that first week after Hybern, then his mate was a really lucky girl. But the thought caused guilt to eat away at her insides. All those times she'd asked him for help – with her baths or to stay with her until she fell asleep – were all moments she'd stolen from him when he could have been with his mate instead. Every time he'd brought her food and checked on her, or even just spent a few hours in comfortable silence as she adjusted to her new life and body.

“I'm sorry,” she murmured, unaware of the flustered expression on Azriel's face after her last comment. “When you helped me, I… I never meant to keep you from her. I hope she doesn't–”

“Don't worry about it,” he cut her off, a small smile now playing on his lips. “I'll always be there to help you when you need it.”

Y/N smiled again, whispering a ‘thank you’, though she was still not entirely convinced. But Azriel extended his beautiful wings, ready to return to his friends.

“You know how to get back to your room from here, yes?” he inquired, glancing behind her at the doors that led inside. When she nodded, he continued, “I'll see you later, then.”

A beat of his wings, and he was gone.

With a sigh, Y/N turned to walk inside, mindlessly brushing that same spot near her heart.

~~~~~~

Azriel used the few minutes of flight to reel in his nerves.

What was he thinking, telling Y/N his mate was a lot like her? The question had caught him off guard, and his brain had stopped working. He couldn't very well tell her they were mates – not there, not like that – but he should have come up with some better answer.

She’s lucky to have you.

The words echoed in his mind. He knew she meant it, like she seemed to mean everything she said. But would she still feel lucky once she learned it was her, that she was the one who had him from the first moment he saw her a month ago?

The only thing he was sure about was that Y/N could feel the bond. He'd seen her rub her chest multiple times, always in the same place, right where he felt their bond in his own chest. She just didn't know what it meant. He couldn't blame her for it, not when she was still new to the faerie world.

Even as he joined the others in Amren's apartment, it was difficult to keep his attention on the conversation, on keeping an eye on Lucien, on what their next step would be. For the first time in decades, he was having troubles focusing, his mind constantly shifting to Y/N.

He couldn't go on like this. He had to tell her. He'd waited because she was still processing everything she'd gone through, but now she was feeling better. And she'd asked about mates. She deserved to know.

Azriel made his decision. Next time they'd be alone, he'd tell her the whole truth. Hoping she'd understand and not push him away.

He wasn't sure he'd be able to handle it.

Taglist: @mrsjna @navyblue-eternity @paintedbyshadows

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Read part 3 here!

#azriel #acotar #azriel shadowsinger #sjm #azriel × reader #fanfic #fanfiction #azriel spymaster #azriel fluff #azriel fanfic #azriel x y/n #fluff #inner circle #cassian #rhysand #feyre archeron

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pellucid-constellations · 9 months

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Only in Dreams

Pairing: Azriel x Reader

Summary: In his dreams, Azriel recounts how he got to his mate.

Word count: 2k

Warnings: Some angst, mentions of injuries

a/n: Hi this is my first acotar fic idk what I'm doing. I've been reading them for years so here's a little one for fun <3 I know it's different from my usual but inspiration is a finicky creature :) Also, italics denote flashbacks.

There was very little Azriel wouldn’t do for his mate.

He had learned that early on.

In those early days, when the bond had made itself known to only him, there was so much confusion and strife within the shadowsinger. He had known you for decades, admired you from afar, and befriended you under self-made pretenses. You were a light, a healer, too good and sweet to be anything to him other than a friend, a coworker.

But you were also his mate.

The air had been knocked from his lungs at the realization.

“Is everything okay?” you had asked, sweet confusion bunching at your brows.

And Azriel couldn’t answer, not for several long beats.

“Az, what’s wrong? You look like Cassian after he took that weird herb Majda wanted me to test.”

Another bout of silence, this time accompanied by soft, warm hands along his cheeks. You leaned in, the sweet scent knocking him out of his stupor. As he jerked back, you only followed, blinking in surprise.

“Azriel—”

“I apologize,” he finally—weakly—stammered out. “I was talking with Rhys.”

“You were talking with Rhys?”

It hadn’t sounded much like a question, but Azriel nodded anyways, enraptured by you and your closeness. He needed to get away, to leave. You were too close. He was too weak.

But then you giggled, and the sound was so melodic and saccharine that he found himself breathless again. He could get lost in that sound. If he was being honest with himself, he had gotten lost in that sound plenty of times before. But now… now. Gods, now you were his mate.

As you laughed some more, teasing retorts echoing in the air, Azriel knew you had no idea.

And, as Azriel had learned, that was fine. You didn’t need to know. Because he knew, and that was enough.

Enough for the overwhelming devotion he felt for you to finally have substance. To finally be validated.

You were his—everything sweet and good was his to protect. And, gods, did he want to protect you.

You made that very difficult in the weeks after the bond had snapped for him. His instincts were in overdrive, taking note of your every move and praying to the cauldron that you were careful when he was sent on missions and you stayed back in Velaris. He had nothing to worry about when that was the case. The inner circle loved you almost as much as he did.

But then Rhys decided you were needed.

With an unreciprocated mating bond and a mate that cared so little for her own self-preservation, that had been Azriel’s worst nightmare.

“Reconsider.”

“There is nothing to reconsider, Azriel. We need a healer in Windhaven to show them that the clipping won’t be seen to fruition. And y/n just so happens to be our court healer,” Rhys carefully explained for the third time.

“Send Majda.”

Rhys held the bridge of his nose. “There is a reason y/n took over her post. Madja is far too old to be making those kinds of trips.”

“Send anyone else,” Azriel rasped, a tightness to his words.

“No. She is the best. It will only be for a few weeks and Cassian—”

“Rhysand.”

Rhys paused at the desperation laced within his brother’s tone. He removed the fingers attempting to abate the ache along his temple and observed Azriel’s clenched fists and restless shadows. Rhys’s lips parted in shock, his eyes blinking in quick succession. Something clicked within his gaze.

“Is she…”

The muscle in Azriel’s jaw quivered. “Just don’t send her there. Please.”

Rhys raised a hand to run down his jaw. “My gods, Azriel. This is…this is—does she know?”

“No,” he replied, quick and low.

“I understand what you’re feeling, but I can’t stop her. You know that, brother.”

And, unfortunately, Azriel knew that.

When you set your mind to something—when you knew you were going to help people—that was it. There would be nothing keeping you from helping those in need. Especially the Illyrian women. Azriel was pretty sure you kept a dartboard somewhere in the house with Lord Devlon’s face on it.

He loved that about you, truly he did. But it also made you reckless.

There were plenty of instances where you burned yourself out from healing. You would come home swaying on your feet or be so depleted you couldn’t even winnow correctly. He could count on two hands the amount of times you passed out at the dinner table after work. When he thought about you doing that in Windhaven… Azriel couldn’t even stomach the thought.

“Then order her,” Azriel gritted out. He could hear you coming. You and Cassian, bags packed, chatting down the hall about something insignificant.

Why couldn’t he come, again?

Right, because he would “stir up the camp” or whatever obtuse reason Rhys had given him.

“You know that won’t go over well,” Rhys countered.

“Neither will the entirety of Windhaven if she gets hurt.”

Azriel’s threat fell on deaf ears as you came bounding into the room, bright and determined and smiling at him as if you weren’t leaving.

“Here to see us off, Az?”

That trip to Windhaven had been awful—for Azriel and for you. Rhys’s “ordering” hadn’t been effective, and neither had Cassian’s ability to pick up on context clues. As you stood, baffled at Rhys’s sudden change in plans, Cassian didn’t so much as look at Azriel’s subtle vies for assistance. Because Cassian had been just as baffled as you were.

So, you went to Windhaven.

And then you came home hurt.

Not terribly, just a few cuts and a black eye that rivaled his own from the last time he trained with the Valkyries.

Cassian explained that there had been a fight unrelated to you, but you had gotten caught up in it. He suspected it was a ploy to get hands on you, but Azriel had stopped listening to him the second you landed on the balcony with stitches on your forehead. The moment he saw your hands bandaged and your eye purple and blue.

You had laughed about your inability to fight, knocking an injured hand into Cassian’s side as he jested that it was time for you to get into the training ring with him. Later, Azriel would agree with that sentiment. In that moment, however, unparalleled fear had coursed through his veins. Rhys was the only one ready for it.

Cassian’s back slammed into the far wall of the house, wings splaying out against stone. Azriel’s shadows were gone as he held his brother against the wall, abandoning him in favor of wrapping around your wounds.

Azriel thought he heard you scream.

“You said you would protect her!” he seethed, pushing his forearm against Cassian’s throat, blue siphon blazing atop his hand.

“Azriel, stop!” Your call went unheard. Rhys stood ground in front of you, arm jutting out when you tried to get around him.

Cassian pushed back against him, face twisted in confusion. “I did. I pulled her from that fight as soon as I could, Az. You think—” his words cut off with another shove from his brother “—you think I would have let anything happen to her on purpose?”

Azriel growled, low and dangerous. “All I think is that my mate came back looking like that when you swore to take care of her. You swore.”

The room went silent, stagnant. Even the shadows halted their appraisal of you as you held onto Rhys’s arm. Cassian stopped fighting. Somewhere down the hall, the rushed footsteps of some other member of the family abruptly stopped.

“She’s your mate?”

“Azriel—” Your whisper was lost in the lingering chaos of the room.

The time after was a blur for Azriel. He knew he left the balcony, retreating to his room hastily after sending you a longing, apologetic glance. He knew you called after him, that you were breathless and shaking and Rhys kept holding you back… telling you to give him some time to cool off.

He didn’t need time. He needed you, and Azriel had been positive that would never happen now.

Half of his shadows joined him in his room, engulfing him as he sat on his bed with his head in his hands. The other half stayed with you, still worried about the pain that you had endured. It was a miracle you hadn’t sent them away. They would have listened to you if you had. They would always listen to you.

When the door creaked, his shadows covered him even more, encasing his fear and worry and embarrassment into a shell that kept him safe.

He was a fool.

“Azriel?”

He had to be imagining the sweet trill of your voice. There was no way you had come for him, not after all of that. But soon, your shoes slinked into the mess of shadows between his legs, and a bandaged hand gently guided his chin up.

When he met your eyes, his shadows circled faster. His wings fell lower and lower against the bed, giving himself up to your gaze.

“Azriel,” you repeated, music within the swish of dark air. “Care to explain, shadowsinger?”

The bruises on your face made his stomach turn. He went to look away, to escape this physical and mental turmoil, but you only locked your wrists and kept him there.

It took him a moment, but he finally relented.

“You are my mate,” he spoke, gravely and unsure—even though that was the one thing Azriel was sure of above all else. “You are my mate and you are hurt. I am sorry for my actions… if I scared you or—”

“I wasn’t asking about the display of male violence on the balcony.” Your teasing smile made some of his shadows rest.

It also made hope swell within the deepest parts of Azriel’s wearied chest.

You didn’t look forlorn at his offhanded declaration, nor did you look repulsed. You just looked like… you. You looked at him as you always had, and maybe that meant something.

Maybe that was something for Azriel to hold onto.

“How long have you known?” you asked, when he spent a moment too long admiring the upturn of your mouth.

Azriel blinked, moving his eyes back to your own. “A while.”

“And you weren’t going to tell me?” You didn’t sound accusatory, or even angry as he was sure Feyre had all those years ago. You only sounded sad. That made it worse.

“I wanted to tell you,” Azriel stressed, leaning forward on the bed to capture your legs between his. “I wanted to, I just—y/n, I just…”

There was no solid explanation. You didn’t rush him as he stumbled over his words—you were patient, as you always were. You were patient and Azriel was a coward.

Determination set a line in his brow.

“I was a coward,” he affirmed. “I didn’t want to push you away… to make you feel unsure or pressured. You are… you are everything. You have been everything to me for many years now. If I had ruined that—if I had pushed something upon you that you did not want—”

“Has it occurred to you, Azriel, that I would very much like to be your mate?”

Azriel paused his spiel, licking his drying lips as he searched your eyes for the lie.

“Only when I dream.”

You had kissed him after that, all bruised and scratched and broken, and Azriel found himself dreaming.

As he stared at you across the sitting room, surrounded by your raucous, disruptive family, Azriel dreamed again. The glow of the fire lit up the side of your face as you laughed, sending warmth up the long-accepted mating bond, and he dreamed of you in every iteration of his life.

And he would do anything to keep that dream alive.

#azriel x reader #azriel x you #azriel acotar #azriel shadowsinger #azriel fanfic #acotar fanfiction #a court of thorns and roses #azriel

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solbaby7 · 6 months

Note

If ur still taking requests can i ask for azriel x reader. Where reader and Az are newish friends. One day Elain asks reader for help on how to please a man (I imagine elain always on her back 🤷‍♀️). Reader asks elain if its to show Az and elain just blushes sweetly saying "maybe". Reader being a girls girl shows elain how to be ontop and how to do other favors like if they were besties. ( idk if uve seen game of thrones but a girl shows khalessi how to ride khal drogo. The girl straight up straddles her with clothes on of course, And shows her. I have it in my head that while reader straddles elain Az walks in and is like 😮😮). Readers a bit jealous cuz she has a mini crush on azriel but doesnt show it. She sees elain with some hickies and what not and she decides she cant be around Az anymore (hurts too much blah idk lol). Az is like wtf! Turns out that Elain was asking for sexy help for lucien!!! Doesnt have to be detailed smutty at all, whatever ur comfortable with is cool with me. Oh btw i so so loved that possessive toxic azriel fic u posted the other day. 🫠🫠🫠 🥵🥵🥵

I love love love love love this idea! So happy you requested it🤍💗

—

Teach Me

azriel x reader

[ part 2 ]

“Well—can you help me with that?” A furious blush fans across Elain’s cheeks, eyes wide and hands fumbling at her sides. Dainty fingers dig into the intricate lace detailing of her dress, nails raking over the pattern in attempts to calm the racing of her heart.

“You want to know how to please a male,” You repeat gently, slightly shocked after she’d timidly slipped into your bedroom with flushed cheeks and sweaty palms. It took Elain ten whole minutes to reign in her rambling until she’d finally blurted it out. “Anyone in particular?” She doesn’t meet your eye, shifting her weight from foot to foot and your stomach rolls at the turn your mind takes. Elain had been spending a lot of time around Azriel; afternoons spent tending to the garden and evenings were blocked off to trail behind as she baked some new sweet treat. “Az, maybe?”

“Maybe,” Elain mutters softly, subtly taking in the contents of your room. The pictures propped against your side table and the endless jars and creams stacked neatly on your vanity. “Can you please teach me?”

Pushing side your curiosity, you offer an encouraging smile, patting at the spot beside you on the bed. “Come here.” The first step is hesitant and so is the one that follows but Elain still finds herself following the gentle command and complying even further when you urge her to lie back. You can feel her thighs shake when you swing a leg over to straddle them but the trembling subsides when you adjust her hair and straighten out her dress. “Sex is like a dance.”

Immediately, she’s hooked, hanging onto every word as if you were the Mother herself coming down for a personal visit. Briefly, Elain’s gaze flicks to the door, shoulders relaxing when noting its shut and locked; curtains drawn and the fireplace crackled with life. The smell of you is everywhere. Something light yet memorable, soft and elegant, classic and slightly sweet—soothing in every way. “A dance?”

“It starts off slow,” You begin, a sliver of your abdomen exposed in your Night Court attire. A breathable onyx top that seemed to wrap around your chest like a bandage, blending into a lighter material that was slightly see-through. “Lingering glances from across the room, the heat of feeling his eyes watching you long after you’ve looked away.” Her confusion is palpable in her furrowed brows and slight pout. “Love always begins in the eyes—I’ve heard of women who’ve finished males with nothing more than their gaze alone.”

“Finished?” Your brow raises, a teasing smirk accompanying it and the implication alone has Elain’s cheeks rosy once more. “Oh, gods. I don’t think I’m capable of anything like that.”

Your fingers trace along the length of her bare arms, holding her hands and guiding them to the sides of her head as you hover, voice low. “You are a woman. You’re capable of anything.”

Elain swallows thickly, taking in the words as if it were the first time she truly wanted to believe them. “What if he doesn’t like it? Like me or the fact that I’m not very experienced.”

“They don’t care about if you have experience or not. They simply desire what they’ve never had.” She hangs onto every word, analyzing the way you guide her through the motions of what she’d do. Talking her through the scenarios on how she’d touch; when to kiss and gently tug at hair. Eventually the blushing becomes less frequent, Elain’s eyes fluttering closed as she visualized it, working through the new feelings that brewed at the thought of being able to use such teachings.

“And they like that? Us on top?”

“If you like it then they’ll love it.” You rest her hands at your waist, demonstrating the sensual rocking of hips going back and forth. “Fae males are not like the human men you were accustomed to—all sweet and gentle. Fae’s fuck. They take control,” You’re still above her, watching as her thoughts race a mile a minute, thick lashes fluttering before she moves in a flurry. Quickly the position is changed and while it’s a little sloppy, Elain was obviously paying attention as she hooks her leg over your thighs the same way you had hers. “Good job—exactly like that.”

She lets out a laugh, seemingly surprised in her own actions but the thrill of it all is evident across ethereal features. “My heart feels like it’s going to beat out of my chest.”

“Breathe through it and always remember that no matter how highly you think of him in your mind, no matter how highly others think of him—in that room, he belongs to you. There for you to do as you please and if you’re ever uncomfortable you can always say no. You can always stop no matter how far you’ve gotten.”

Elain nods in understanding, dainty fingers barely gripping at your wrists. “Thank you for this. I don’t know what I’d do if—just, thank you.”

She lingers a tad longer, following every instruction you give and just as you’re about to correct her, your door creaks open. A familiar voice calls out your name, shadows slinking across the wallpaper but they freeze once they take you in—sprawled out against the bed with Elain straddling you, hands pinned by your head.

“We were just—“ Elain scrambles off of you, cheek and chest a furious red as her mouth opens and closes; unable to come up with a reasonable explanation before she’s sliding past Azriel and rushing down the hallway.

“Most people knock.”

But Az wasn’t most people. You’d been friends for years and long since had he forgone the formality of knocking before entering. He hasn’t moved an inch, still donning his fighting leathers and surely he must’ve just rushed in from flying because his hair was a fucking mess. Inky strands lay messily atop his head, flopping over his forehead and teasing the thick of his brows. “What was that?” A finger points in the direction Elain had just disappeared off too and you’re unable to explain why such anger swells in your gut—all too aware of the fact that another female would be using your moves on him.

Seducing him in a manor that belonged to you but would never actually be you.

“Just wait a little, I’m sure it’ll make sense soon.” Confusion sweeps over the angles of his face at the vagueness of your words, skewing the corners of his mouth and you have to physically tear your eyes away before you did something stupid. Like, kiss him. You suck in a sharp breath, a hand curling around the doorknob. “You should get to bed, Az. It’s late.”

You can’t bear to see the look on his face when you close the door on him but it was for the best. It was one thing crushing on him while knowing he wanted another. But it was more complicated now, teaching the object of all his desires exactly what to do to him—how to please him and draw out the sounds you’d been dreaming about for decades.

You flop down on your bed, nose scrunching at the lingering smell of Elain on your pillows.

Sleep doesn’t grace you with her presence that night, instead offering a series of scenarios of what could be happening a few hallways down.

Elain’s back two days later, a goofy grin spread across her cheeks and a line of hickeys branding the side of her neck in a way that makes your stomach turn. It takes everything in you to hide the jealously, to smooth over the embarrassment of ever possibly thinking that Azriel would go for you when he had a blushing Archeron hanging off his arm. “I take it that it went well.”

“More than well,” Elain confessed, dressed in a pale shade of green with ivy’s laced into the thin sleeves. “It was perfect—everything was perfect thanks to you.” She continues on, divulging naughty details and devastating descriptions of Azriel’s fingers grazing at bare skin, the tickle of his hair against her cheek, the warmth radiating from his body when the nights chill became too much. “I’d always heard whispers about the males of Autumn but you guys really weren’t joking,” Your head tilts to the side at that certain detail, brow quirking and your spoon halts its swirling about the teacup. “Fire really does run through their veins.”

“Autumn males?” Your hair flicks behind your shoulder with the wild way you turn to face her, arms crossed loosely over your chest. “You were with Lucien last night?”

Elain nods with a knowing smile growing at the corner of full lips, the tulle of her dress shifting obnoxiously when she takes a seat on your bed.

“I guess I just assumed you’d be with Azriel.”

“Not quite my type,” She replies wistfully, gaze far away as if she were reminiscing on the night before and the male involved. “He’s yours though,” It’s not a question but a statement, thrown out there as if it were a known fact amongst others and you were the last to be let in. “—you like him.”

The teacup pressed to your lips muffles the words but Elain still understands perfectly clear. “”He’s my friend.”

“Friends don’t really look at friends the way he looks at you.” You swallow audibly, attempting to hide your interest and yet it’s the quick flick of your eyes that gives you away. “It’s exactly as you said the other night,” Elain raises from the bed, a gentle hand trailing up your arm the same way you’d done to her. “Love always begins in the eyes. Just look at him—really look at him and see what’s right in front of you.”

Your hands tremble in your lap and for the first time in a very long while, it was you that felt like the blushing virgin searching for answers and not knowing where to look. “I don’t think I’m capable of handling what I might find.”

“You are a woman,” Elain softly answers. “You’re capable of anything.”

#acotar x reader #a court of thorns and roses #acotar x you #azriel #acotar azriel #azriel x you #azriel fluff #azriel fic #azriel fanfic #azriel shadowsinger #azriel acotar #acotar smut #azriel spymaster #azriel x reader #az smut #azriel smut #elain archeron #acotar

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bookwormjust · 5 days

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Protective shadows (Established relationship, Azriel's mate, Cassian teasing as usual, Azriel not in the mood)

The sun hung low over the sprawling courtyards of the House of Wind, casting long, golden rays across the stone floors. The Inner Circle had gathered for a relaxed afternoon, a rare reprieve from the pressures of their roles and responsibilities. You sat beside Azriel on one of the plush outdoor sofas, enjoying the warm breeze that carried the scent of blooming flowers from the nearby gardens.

Azriel’s shadows, ever-present and watchful, danced lazily around him, the dark tendrils swirling softly like smoke caught in a gentle breeze. One shadow, in particular, was coiled around your wrist like a bracelet—warm and familiar, its touch a constant, comforting reminder of his presence. It seemed to pulse with a life of its own, moving in sync with the rhythm of your heartbeat.

Cassian, always one to notice the little details, caught sight of the shadow and grinned, leaning back in his chair with a teasing glint in his eyes. “You know, Az, I don’t think I’ve ever seen your shadows so attached to anyone before. Are you sure you’re not overdoing it a little?” he joked, a playful smirk tugging at the corners of his mouth. “I mean, they’re practically glued to her.”

Azriel’s expression shifted, his eyes narrowing slightly as he glanced at Cassian. There was a flicker of something sharp in his gaze, a protective edge that made his shadows stir restlessly around him. He kept his hand resting on your knee, his thumb brushing slow, calming circles into your skin, but his posture tensed, like a coiled spring ready to snap.

“They do as they please,” Azriel said, his voice low and steady, but there was an unmistakable warning in his tone. His shadows, sensing his unease, tightened ever so slightly around your wrist, as if reaffirming their presence, their silent vow to protect.

Cassian chuckled, clearly oblivious to the shift in Azriel’s mood. “Oh, come on, Az. It’s just a shadow. It’s not like anyone’s going to steal her away from you,” he teased, the grin on his face broadening. “Besides, it’s not like she’s in danger here.”

Azriel’s eyes darkened, a flicker of anger sparking in their depths. The shadows around him grew denser, swirling with a sudden intensity that made the air feel heavier. He leaned forward slightly, his voice dropping to a dangerously quiet level. “They’re not just shadows, Cassian,” he said, each word edged with a quiet menace. “They’re a part of me, and they know exactly where they belong.”

Cassian’s smile faltered, the lightness of his teasing dimming as he realized Azriel was not in the mood for jokes. He raised his hands in a mock gesture of surrender, though the gleam in his eyes showed he was not entirely cowed. “Alright, alright. No need to get your feathers ruffled, Shadowsinger,” Cassian said, though his tone was more subdued now. “I’m just messing with you.”

But Azriel’s gaze remained hard, his grip on your knee tightening slightly. “She is my mate,” he said, the words resonating with a possessive finality. “My shadows protect what’s mine, and I won’t apologize for that.”

The declaration hung in the air, charged with the weight of his emotions. Azriel’s shadows pulsed in time with his heartbeat, the tendril around your wrist tightening slightly before relaxing, as if echoing his protectiveness. You could feel the intensity of his feelings through your bond—the fierce need to keep you safe, to ensure that nothing and no one could ever harm you.

You reached up, placing a gentle hand on Azriel’s arm, grounding him with your touch. “I like having them close,” you said softly, offering him a reassuring smile. “They make me feel safe.”

Azriel’s gaze softened as he looked at you, the tension in his posture easing just a fraction. His thumb resumed its soothing motion on your knee, and his shadows seemed to calm, their movements becoming more languid and relaxed. He turned his attention back to Cassian, his expression still guarded but the anger fading from his eyes.

Cassian met Azriel’s gaze, his own expression more serious now. “I get it,” he said quietly, a hint of understanding in his tone. “I just didn’t realize it meant that much to you.”

“It does,” Azriel replied, his voice steady, though the underlying edge of protectiveness remained. “She’s everything to me.”

Cassian nodded, his teasing demeanor replaced by a rare look of respect. “Well, then,” he said, a small, genuine smile touching his lips. “I’m glad she has you—and your shadows—looking out for her.”

Azriel inclined his head, accepting the peace offering with a slight nod. He turned his attention back to you, his expression softening further as he caught your eye. The shadow around your wrist gave a gentle squeeze, like a silent promise, before settling back into its usual, comforting rhythm.

You leaned into Azriel, resting your head against his shoulder as his arm wrapped around you, pulling you closer. His wings shifted slightly, brushing against your back in a gesture that felt both protective and intimate. The bond between you thrummed with warmth, a steady reassurance that no matter what, Azriel would always be there, his shadows ever-watchful, ever-loyal.

Cassian might have teased, but you knew the truth: Azriel’s shadows were more than just wisps of darkness—they were extensions of his love, his devotion, and his unyielding promise to keep you safe. And in that moment, wrapped in his embrace with the steady presence of his shadows around you, you knew you were exactly where you belonged.

#azriel x you #azriel x oc #azriel fanfic #azriel x female!reader #azriel x reader #azriel x reader fluff #azriel shadowsinger #azriel spymaster #acotar reader imagine #acotar x reader #acotar #Spotify

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lipstickmarks · 18 days

Text

I Could Take You (not in a fight)

—Cassian x fem!reader

Summary: You tease Cassian. The result are as you'd expect.

Word Count: 2.4K

Warnings: smut, p in v, semi public sex, oral (f receiving), unprotected sex, hickeys, aftercare, princess treatment, possessive Cass lowkey, mention of voyerism, mention of exhibitionism, mention of Az joining for a threesome, ass slapping (playfully), overstimulation

Cassian was showing off, as per usual. Flexing his biceps, extending his wings, and just all-around showboating. He loved to peacock around you right before he went off to training. And show you the evidence of a grueling session when he came back with sweat, scars, and red welts all over his body.

“Wow, Cassian. You’re soooo big and muscley.” You playfully gushed.

His smirk deepened.

“Gotta stay in tip-top shape for my girl, don’t I?” He tapped the tip of your nose, making you giggle. He made to walk out of your room and just as his large hand reached for the doorknob, you spoke up.

“Yeah but…I think I could take you.”

Cassian stopped in his tracks, slowly turning around to face you.

The look on his face was priceless. Shock, slight disbelief, bewilderment, and confusion sat atop his perfect features. You willed your own face not to give anything away. Messing with Cassian was just too fun.

The Lord of Bloodshed stalked toward you, stopping until your toes practically touched his. He loomed over you. War general indeed.

Yummy, you thought to yourself.

“Come again, sweetheart?”

Here we go.

“I mean, I train with Feyre and Mor and I do pilates once a week.” You patted your abdomen. “I think I could take you.”

Cassian snorted, his eyes sparking to life with amusement and a bit of mischief. His voice was low and raspy when he said,

“Is that so?”

In an instant, Cassian had you in his arms, winnowing you to the training grounds. It was still blue hour, the sun still slumbering beneath the horizon. No one else had arrived yet, no trace of Azriel or the Valkyries.

You wrapped your arms around yourself, trying to warm up despite the biting cold. You only had on a zip-up jacket over your pajamas and fluffy pink bunny slippers on your feet.

Cassian was muttering animatedly to himself as he dug through his bag.

“Been waiting for this.”

“So exciting.”

“Can finally see me in action!”

Cassian had wrapped his hands up in white bandages that you weren’t 100% sure the intended use of. He had a huge grin on his face as he stepped up to you in the ring and got into a defensive position.

“Okay, baby, go ahead!” He said with a grin.

You looked toward Ramiel in the distance, then back at the inside of the training compound, then back to Cassian.

“Go ahead what?”

Cassian gestured with his raised hands.

“You said you could take me, so go ahead. Make the first move. Promise I’ll go easy on you.” He waggled his eyebrows.

“Hm?” You hummed, batting your eyelashes slowly. Your eyes slowly widened and you plastered on an expression of realization on your face. “Oh! I didn’t mean in a fight.”

Cassian’s eyebrows pinched together, the confusion only lasting a few heartbeats as you smiled coyly at him.

His hazel eyes narrowed at you. The growing smirk on his lips had your toes curling inside your fuzzy bunny slippers. He took a purposeful step toward you, every movement intentional. Cassian stepped up to you until you were toe-to-toe, the war general towering over you.

His large hand came up to cup the side of your face, thumb stroking over the apple of your cheek. A sensitive, chaste move but the dark lust in his eyes told you his thoughts were anything but innocent.

Cassian leaned down, lips brushing against the shell of your ear.

“Do you really want to take all of me, sweetheart? Out here where anyone could see?” He brushed a kiss to the skin just under your ear. “Gwyn?” Another kiss, this time on your jaw. “Azriel?” Cassian’s voice was raspy as he nibbled on your ear, sparks shooting through your body.

The hitch in your breath was impossible to deny, especially with Cassian’s fae hearing.

“Oh, you’d like that, wouldn’t you? You’d love for Azzie to walk in on us and see just how deep you can take me.” Cassian nipped at the skin of your jawline, sucking a deep purple mark there. “Maybe you want to see him pleasuring himself at the sight of us.” A lick and kiss over the new bruise. “Maybe you want him to join us.”

You gasped and held onto Cassian’s biceps, your knees becoming wobbly beneath you. Tilting your head to the side, you gave Cassian access to explore wherever he wanted. Your throat, your thighs, your back, whatever he wanted. You wouldn’t deny him a damn thing.

“Cass…” His name came out in a pathetic whimper.

He responded by pressing a hot, messy kiss to your mouth, all teeth and tongues. Cassian was anything but subtle and he certainly fucked like it. He liked it deep, sloppy, messy, and loud.

You sucked on his tongue, unable to hide your want for him a moment more. Cassian was so big and his very aura invaded all of your senses. You wanted him to fog up your periphery and fuck you until you couldn’t see, hear, smell, taste, touch anything except him.

Cassian growled, a primal, purely male growl as he swept you into his arms, your legs locking around his hips as he did. You might have said that last part out loud.

“Let’s just see if you can take what I give you, sweetheart.”

~~~

Cassian rutted up into you, his dick sinking into your soft gummy walls as he kept one hand braced behind your head and the other around your waist as he had you up against the wall. Even when he was being rough and untethered, he still ensured you were safe and comfortable. You didn’t feel the cold steel of the compound, just Cassian’s warm toned chest pressed against yours.

He’d only gotten your shorts shimmied halfway down your thighs before you spread your legs and displayed your already wet pussy for him. Cassian had gone stupid at the sight, his eyes fixated on your core. He ate you hungrily, tongue prodding and sucking at your clit, drawing an orgasm from you before you could even savor the feeling of his tongue inside you.

He quickly replaced his fingers with his dick, sliding himself out of his pants and stroking himself once, twice, and then gliding seamlessly into you. It was always a delicious stretch, just the right amount of pressure that equated to pleasure.

Cassian’s hips thrusted against yours, his cock filling you up farther than you thought he could go and then sliding almost all the way out, leaving just the tip in before he slammed into you again.

“Ah!” You cried out, your face coming down to hide in Cassian’s neck. You bit the skin there to keep yourself from screaming. This close to dawn, people would surely be arriving soon but Cassian showed no intention of stopping, not until his girl was thoroughly satisfied.

Cassian hissed when your teeth pinched his skin and he sped up his pace as a result. You leaned fully into his weight, and he never once faltered to hold you. So big and so strong.

“Think I can do deeper, gorgeous?” Cassian murmured in your ear, kissing the top of your chest. “Know you can take it.”

You nodded, words escaping you.

“Deeper, Cass.” Your hands slid into his long hair, clutching his silky locks. “I need it deeper!”

Your pleading must have snapped something inside Cassian, something that drove him absolutely insane. He pulled your body away from the wall and let you slide down just an inch until you were balanced on his strong, toned thighs. His wide hands spread out on your thighs, guiding you to spread out wider for him. At this angle, he was hitting even deeper and brushing up against the spot that made you sing.

Your moans were echoing off the walls of the compound now, nonsensical babbles and Cassian’s name and pleading for more.

Once he had you balanced on his thighs and snugly up against the wall, one of his hands went to the back of your throat and he pulled you into a deep, searing kiss. His tongue swiped along your bottom lip and you parted eagerly for him. He swept into your mouth, suckling on your tongue. Then, his free hand went to rubbing circles against your clit.

That would be your undoing.

The lethal combination of Cassian’s cock slipping so deep inside you, you could feel him inside your god damned stomach, the heat of his kiss, and the expert precision of his fingers, all building you up to an incredible high.

“Cass! Fuck!” You screamed. You wrapped your arms around his neck and moaned into his neck. “Fuck me so good, babe…” Your release wasn’t far off, your pussy was throbbing, swallowing Cassian whole. He knew it too. He knew your body better than you did, knew all the cues and when you were about to cum.

Your praise sang to him, spurred him on. Cassian slid out until just the head was barely parting your pussy lips. Then, all at once, he deepened the kiss and slammed back into you. He rocked into you with a mad fervor and your moans were a steady chant in his ear, music to him. Your nails sunk into Cassian’s back, making small indents where his tattoos were. The pleasure grew and grew and grew as Cassian brought you to the edge.

One last perfect brush of his thumb against your clit and a hard thrust and that tense rope snapped. You were cumming fast and hard. A deep and overwhelming orgasm that quivered and shook you all the way down. Cassian fucked you through it the whole time, chasing his own pleasure.

He wasn’t far off either. It didn’t take more than a few strokes until he started to get sloppy with his movements, his muscles tensing. You were pulled flush against him and with one final thrust, Cassian was cumming inside you, moaning and growling from the satisfaction of filling you up, marking you, claiming you.

And just because he was a sadistic bastard, he continued to fuck you. You winced from the overwhelming pressure but when you saw where Cass was looking, what had his eyes glazing over, you felt your clit twitch.

He was watching where you two were still joined– a ring of cum building up where his cock sunk into your core. The sight of it was filthy. Filthy and depraved and so, so messy. Cassian had made a mess of his girl.

“Fuck…” Cassian murmured. He was transfixed. His movements stilled but he remained inside you. Just watching where he was buried to the hilt inside you.

Your head sagged once pleasure gave way to exhaustion. At this time, you were usually going back to sleep. You usually woke up early to see Cassian off and then climbed back into bed for a few more hours of sleep.

You let out a deep contented sigh, your entire body reeling from the high, that deep pleasure only Cassian could draw from you. His arms went slightly limp too but he maintained his hold on you.

Cassian nudged your cheek with his nose and you giggled, meeting his eyes.

He helped you down but didn’t let your slipper clad feet touch the floor. He scooped you up into a bridal carry and walked the two of you further into a compound, into a small infirmary room meant for treating accidental (or intentional) wounds.

Cassian laid you down on the center cot and pressed a soft kiss to your forehead.

You got the sense he was leaving and caught his wrist.

“Where are you going?” you pouted.

“Just going to clean you up, gorgeous.” Cassian tapped the tip of your nose as he had done earlier this morning and turned to dig through a supply kit. He found a cloth and a canteen of water. He pressed the canteen to your lips, urging you to drink.

You took it from him and gulped the water down greedily while Cass cleaned you up. The sensitivity between your legs made you twitch and he pressed a tiny apology kiss to the inside of your thigh.

Once you were clean, Cassian pulled your shorts back up your legs and sat you up on the cot, not letting you lift a single finger. He wrapped his strong arms around you and pressed a kiss to your hair.

“Mmm…” You inhaled his scent as you buried your face in his chest. “I was being silly, Cass. I could never take you in a fight.”

A deep laugh made his chest and shoulders rumble.

“There’s no universe in which you and I would ever be in a fight, sweetheart.” He tucked his hands under your thighs once more and lifted you from the cot, setting you back down on your feet. “But I do have to be ready for anybody who tries to fight me for you, so I have to get on with my training now.” He gave you an apologetic frown and kiss to your nose.

You pouted playfully and snagged another kiss from him.

“Okay. I’ll leave you to it, Lord of Bloodshed.” You mockingly saluted, which sent Cass into another roar of laughter.

Cassian begged to winnow you home but you refused, insisting that you’d taken up enough of his morning, which was only proven by the muffled voices and sounds of people arriving.

Eventually, your man relented with a promise to come check in on you at lunch.

“I’m not broken, Cass.” You giggled. “Although, you did nearly split me in half.”

Cassian’s eyes darkened and he leaned down to nip your bottom lip, causing you to squeal.

“You were right, sweetheart. You can take me. You can take everything I give you. It’s why you’re so perfect for me.”

You giggled at his words and ran a hand down his chest before you headed for the door of the infirmary.

“That, and this.” He murmured, before you felt the subtle sting of a hand smacking your ass.

You whirled around, eyes wide and cheeks red and saw Cassian smirking, big hulking biceps crossed over his chiseled chest. Before you could retort, he winnowed away in a flash of red, leaving only his scent and phantom touch behind.

Oh, you were so getting him back at lunch.

#cassian #cassian acotar #acotar #cassian x reader #cassian x you #cassian x yn #cassian acotar x reader #cassian acotar x you #acotar smut #cassian smut #cassian x reader smut

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utterlyotterlyx · 2 months

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Starstruck

Azriel x Fem!Reader

Summary - Azriel had never wished upon a star, and after finding you, he wished he had done it sooner.

Warnings - FLUFFFFFFF, a touch of angst and sadness

There were thirteen stars that streaked across the skies during Starfall, Azriel had resound himself to noting each one as they made their journey across the same canvas each year, watching how they danced between one another and entranced the city with their show.

He sometimes wondered just how perfect someone had to be in order to be one of them, to shine so brightly and to be so adored that a whole city would wait an entire year to watch them for just a fleeting moment.

After watching for so long, Azriel knew each of them in his own special way, but he had always been particularly drawn to the singular star that always drifted to the back of the colony, like it was trying to stay for just a moment longer, and he could have sworn that he felt it watching him on more than one occasion, even when it twinkled idly in the sky and pulsed with pearlescent light.

One particular Starfall, Azriel gave in to his infantile wonder that perhaps wishing on a star would make all of his dreams come true, dreams that he had never spoken of to anyone. As silly as it felt, Azriel forced himself to close his eyes just as the stars began their dance; he inhaled deeply and wished, what for he'd never tell, but he did it.

In the days that followed, Azriel felt that tiny spark of hope evaporate within him, such showed in his tendrils of shadow who were feeling a little heavier than usual, less mischievous too. Cassian had noticed it, it was only small really and he was surprised that it was him who had caught it, but he knew Azriel better than anyone, he'd notice any slight change.

"What's wrong?" Azriel's chest was glistening in the last dwindling glance of sunlight, rising and falling rapidly as he worked to slow his breathing from his latest training session with Cassian.

Azriel spared Cassian a side-long glance and moved to unwrap his knuckles, the bandages winding onto the ground, "Nothing," he cast his eyes down to his knuckles, bruised and bloody and also throbbing from the impact of Cassian's abdomen, the feeling didn't do much to tempt his thoughts.

"Bullshit," Cassian cursed softly, "You're you but not. Tell me what's going on Az."

Sighing, slightly agitated, Azriel turned to his brother, noticing the stars leaking in from the distance, "I want my mate. I want what you and Nesta have, and Feyre and Rhys. I thought that maybe it was my turn next," his heart stung with the knowing of Lucien and Elain's accepted mating bond, he glanced behind Cassian, seeking comfort in something other-worldly, "I wished it."

Azriel hadn't meant to make Cassian feel guilty, he was glad that Cassian had found his mate, someone to love for the rest of his days., but it didn't stop him from feeling more alone than he had ever felt in his life.

The raw emotion in his voice caused Cassian to stand speechless before him, "I'm going to go for a walk, clear my head."

Without another word, Azriel shrugged his shirt over his head and took off into the skies, unable to look back at the pained expression on Cassian's face. Part of him was ashamed for his feelings, he was Spymaster of the Night Court, anyone who loved him would be in constant danger, perhaps that was why he hadn't been gifted with a soul-bound other.

Landing on the cobbled streets of Velaris, Azriel began trapsing through the city with his head hung low, not particularly paying attention to anything until his shadows coiled around his arms and tugged at him. The Shadowsinger scoffed, pushing himself onward and choosing to ignore his companions, only barking at them when they swam over his face and restricted his vision; Azriel swatted at them, "What?"

One particular shadow, the one most prone to dancing and becoming lost in someone's hair, hovered before his eyes, waltzing into the night-kissed air and forcing Azriel to focus. He hadn't realised how far he'd walked until he took a moment to scan the area, he had wandered all the way down to the Sidra, so much being clear from the bubbling drifting from the riverbank as the water sang over the rocks.

Then he heard something that made his heart skip, a soft hum, no louder than a hummingbird, winding down the cobbled path to meet his ears. It was sweet and calm, full of life and serenity, and he couldn't stop himself from following it.

His shadows shivered with each step, each one becoming more active with every metre forward they were carried until they saw you, you were kneeling in the water that perfectly reflected the sky, fingers dipping beneath the surface whilst it swam by you. Your hair was unbound and kissing the surface in a way that sent small ripples through it whenever they would collide.

Azriel stood on the bank and watched you, not being able to place you in his mind, he listened to your song, unwilling to stop his shadows from drawing themselves toward it. Only when those tendrils of darkness grazed against your skin did the song halt, it was replaced by a soft giggle, one that could have made the darkness part to allow in the sun if it wished it.

"Can I help you?" The shadows shuddered at your question, convicted to dancing to the sound of your melodic tone, coiling around the finger you had raised to your eyes to inspect them closer, "How peculiar."

The drenched skirt of your pale blue dress pooled at your feet when you stood, but you didn't take your eyes off of the shadows. And, as if realising how potentially rude they were being, Azriel moved to intervene, to beckon them back to his side, "I'm sorry, they don't seem to want to listen to me today."

Turning to face him, Azriel lost every thought in his mind, the only one lingering in his consciousness being that you were easily the most beautiful thing he had ever seen, "It's alright, I don't mind," you told him with a smile as wide as the Sidra. His shadows continued to dance around you, slithering into every gap possible to just be as close as they could, "Who are you?"

Azriel was slightly taken back by the question, everyone knew who he was, and he didn't mean to feel egotistical when he thought that, most people were afraid of him, and everyone in the city certainly knew who he was. "I'm Azriel," he attempted to call back his shadows but they refused to leave you, he had half a mind to waltz right up to you and pluck them from your skin, but he stayed put, "Who are you?"

"Y/N." Beautiful.

"I haven't seen you here before."

The moon reflected off the surface of the Sidra,

Humming softly, you glanced about with a furrowed brow, like you were trying to find something familiar until your eyes dragged upward and settled on the sky, "And where is here?"

"Velaris. The City of Starlight."

"Starlight," your voice drifted, eyes unwavering in their upward gaze, "How pretty."

Perhaps Azriel should have been cautious of you, the beautiful thing with the long hair and voice as tempting as a siren's, but he wasn't, not even a little bit. If anything, Azriel had found a comfort within you despite only being in your presence for a mere few moments.

After a few moments, your wandering eyes returned to earth and you moved past him, up toward the cobbled path he had strayed from to find you, "Can I walk you home?"

Turning on the balls of your feet, you grinned at him and continued backward, "I'll be fine."

Azriel took a single step forward, "Will I see you again?"

"If you wish it," you told him with a knowing smirk, one that he didn't recognise, before turning from him and disappearing into the night, leaving Azriel wondering just exactly who you were to be able to cause his shadows continue to whisper your name into the darkness.

The next time Azriel saw you was in the Palace of Threads and Jewels, he had only caught a glimpse of you, but your scent of jasmine and pine lingered where you once stood. Azriel excused himself away from Nesta and Feyre, both of who glanced to his hurried form as he retreated from them.

Rounding a corner, he found you inspecting a bouquet of night lilies, your fingers gliding across the velvety petals with a genteel smile on your lips, one that widened when his shadows curled around your ankles, "Hello again," you called to them endearingly, beckoning them up to your fingers where they happily rested whilst you brushed the tip of your nose again them.

Azriel felt his heart clench at the action, and he only pulled himself from his entranced state when you graced him with your attention, "Hello to you too, Azriel," your hands were folded neatly behind your back, his shadows now resting on your shoulders.

"Hello," he took a step forward, and then he noticed just how small you were in comparison to him by the way you craned your neck up to look at him, "I knew I'd see you again."

A grin formed on your lips, "Did you wish it?"

"Perhaps,” Azriel folded his arms across his chest and drank you in, the pinned back hair and the baby whips that floated over your forehead, the white dress that hugged you in all of the perfect ways, and those bright doe eyes tinged with a touch of mischief.

"Then consider your wish granted,” the heel of your shoe clicked against the floor, the aroma of fresh roses and foliage filling the air, and you cocked your head at him slightly as if appreciating his beauty, “How have you been?”

In all honesty, Azriel had been feeling much better since that night he left Cassian after training, and that was because of you. Azriel couldn’t stop thinking about you, how lost you seemed but also not afraid, how gentle you seemed, and your voice, he couldn’t get it out of his head. Without wanting to admit it, Azriel had been looking for you, lazily, but with a hope he thought he had lost. And now there you stood, as pretty at the petals that drifted along the floor.

“I’ve been alright,” he leaned against the pillar of the stop, angling his body into you. It had been an age since someone had asked how he was, especially in the way that you asked, with genuine intrigue and care. “How have you been?”

Smiling, you answered, “I’ve been good,” you tucked a strand of hair behind your ear and giggled softly as a shadow flowed through your hair.

“I’d like to get to know you,” he said with gentle conviction and you couldn’t help but blush, enjoying the sight of those soft eyes and rough exterior clad in black pants and a matching long sleeved cotton shirt.. “If you’d let me?”

“I wouldn’t say no,” you shrugged and took a step forward, close enough to scent the cedar on his clothes, “What are you doing right now?”

“Nothing,” Azriel internally cursed himself for responding so fast, showing his eagerness to spent more than a moment under the moon with you.

With a knowing smirk you huffed out a laugh, “Well, walk with me? I want to explore a little.”

Not needing another word, Azriel pushed himself from the beam and stepped aside for you to slip past him, slowly meandering through the market and observing everything that you could.

“Where is it that you live?” Azriel asked, happy to simply watch you scan the shelves and touch anything that looked soft.

Without looking back, you answered his question with a voice as warm as summer rain, “A little cabin by the streams,” the cotton of your bag brushed against your skirt as you swayed from side to side, craning your head and standing on your tiptoes to glance at the top shelves.

Azriel knew the place, he had always been drawn to it, the white window frames that turned yellow in the golden light that poured from insane, the thatched roof that was almost plaited in the finest of knots, and the tiny garden erected toward the back facing the forest where an array of flowers of all breeds bloomed and basked.

“And you? Where do you live?”

You led Azriel down the cobbled streets, picking up trinkets and admiring their beauty before placing them back on the shelves, “I live in the House of Wind,” from your furrowed brow, he knew that you didn’t know of it; Azriel placed his hands on your shoulders and turned you gently, reaching beneath your chin to angle your head upward, “Up there.”

“It looks beautiful,” you hummed, “You’re very lucky.”

“Yes, I am,” you missed how he looked to you when he spoke, captured by a gleaming stone resting on a plush cushion.

Closing the gap, you took the stone in your hand, resting it in your palm and letting the chain sway against your wrist, “It’s so beautiful,” you spoke in a tone a hush above a whisper, the rustle of a curtain begged your focus and you glanced up to see an elderly woman approaching you.

“A beautiful stone for a beautiful lady,” her voice rasped, but her kind eyes were fixated upon you, smiling in their own way.

“How much?” Azriel asked, appearing behind you with a twinkle in his eye.

“Azriel, no. It’s too much,” you protested, it was an ornately beautiful jewel, a white stone that reflected against the cloth of the ceiling that billowed in the breeze, “I can’t.”

Azriel, nodding his silent message to the shopkeeper, took the chain in his marred fingers and draped it around your neck, clasping it at the back and watching as your fingers reached to brush against it, “It was made for you.”

“Thank you,” you turned around to face him, and it took every ounce of willpower to not brush his fingers against your cheek.

The dropping sun cast its glow over your face, and Azriel gasped slightly, the sun turning your eyes molten and pristine, and felt the golden thread within him thrum into place. For a moment, the world seemed clearer, his senses heightened and your scent seeped into the foundations of his being.

From the look on your face, you had also felt it, your lips had parted slightly and your eyes were wide and glistening, “It’s you,” he was in disbelief, but his heart sang when you rested a hand over his heart, “You’re my mate.”

A gentle nod confirmed it, and Azriel couldn’t stop his hand this time from brushing against your cheek, his thumb dragging over your skin, “Yes.”

“I didn’t think I’d ever find you,” he whispered, “You’re real?”

“I’m real,” you entwined your fingers with his and brought them to your lips, kissing the marred flesh of his knuckles, “I’m here.”

Azriel struggled accepting that someone as perfect as you had been chosen to be his.

He didn’t want to rush you into anything, he wanted you to be comfortable, but he’d be lying if he said that every single part of him wasn’t irrevocably obsessed with you.

But when you met his family for the first time, and held Nyx and rocked him to sleep, did Azriel know that there was no one more made for him than you. Nesta and Feyre adored you from the moment they laid eyes on your sweet smile and large eyes, they had practically whisked you away to a separate sofa to probe and gossip with you. After you had spoken to Cassian and Rhys, his brothers moved to him with wide smiles, telling him that you were perfect.

Then there was Nyx who cried every time someone tried to take him from you, his nuzzled into your side, resting his head against your chest as he slept.

In the months that followed, his adoration for you only grew, and the night you had accepted the bond had been the most magical moment of his life. And not long after, he made you his wife in the most ornately warm ceremony the city had ever seen.

Each day was full of love and laughter, he moved into the cabin with you, and enjoyed every single moment of his life knowing that you were the one waiting for him at the end of the day.

Starfall had rolled around again, reminding Azriel that it was the same night a year ago that caused him to wish for you. He stood with you on that balcony, a stones throw away from the rest of his, and now your, family as the skies opened and the stars began their descent.

“I’ve never seen it like this before,” you uttered, hands resting on his forearms that were wrapped around your waist.

The stars soared, but their usual course was disrupted by their decision to fly toward the balcony. They hovered before you and Azriel and he felt your body leave his embrace, your fingers outstretched to float between the stars that waltzed around your body, “I’ve missed you too,” you told them, skin glittering with their kiss.

Bewildered, Azriel watched you have a conversation with the stars that painted the sky each night. Frowning, he counted the stars, noticing each one as the ones he knew and named, the same ones he created stories and lives for, to only find that one was missing, the last one who always lingered. Then his eyes moved to you and he wondered how he hadn’t realised it before.

The last star was you.

It made sense, you had always shone so brightly in comparison to others. Everyone had always felt settled around you, and Azriel had just thought that it was your serenity that caused it, but no, it was because you were a star.

“You’re a star,” that’s why you didn’t know where you were that night he had found you, it’s because you had fallen from the sky and landed his city, his home.

Smirking slightly, you walked into his open arms, sighing as the stars moved around you, “I prefer to say a wish come true.”

Azriel, chuckling at your words, hooked a finger beneath your chin and pulled your eyes upward, his breath fanned over your face. “If I’d have known then I would have wished for you a lot sooner.”

Authors Note

Just a little one from me 😚

782 notes · View notes

qwimblenorrisstan · 2 months

Text

Kindred Spirits Pt. 2 | Azriel x Rhys’daughter!Reader

Summary: After getting approval from your father, you and Azriel get to enjoy your mating bond in the privacy of the cabin in Illyria, eagerly experimenting with each other.

Word Count: ~3.7k

Warnings: SMUT, p in v penetration, oral (both ways), wingplay, sub Az, bath together, nudity, cutesy cuddles

Minors, do not interact!

A/N: Since this was so highly requested here it is, got a buncha inspiration from requests, hope you enjoy<3

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Requests are open!

A low groan slipped from your lips as you shifted beneath him in the bed. For the past hours, he’d been pounding into you, filling you over and over until both of your bodies were aching and sore.

He had been panting against your skin, harsh breaths slowly calming into the smooth, deep rhythm you were accustomed to.

Even now, you still wanted more, needed more, despite your body’s aching protests.

“We need to get some food, Az.”

You murmured against the warm planes of his chest, the urge to lick and bite gnawing at you, only to shove it down. He sighed, slowly easing out of you and sitting on the edge of the bed. You couldn’t help but miss the feeling of being filled by him almost immediately.

He turned to you, helping you sit up, his large, scarred hands supporting your back, one wrapping around your waist.

“Are you alright?”

His gentle tone had asked, hazel eyes gleaming with concern as his gaze ran over your body, hungry as ever, but noticing each little bruise on your hips from him holding you, or the bites and hickeys left on your neck.

Your mind immediately started wandering as you saw his bare body, eyes running over his muscular and lean form. He looked like he’d been sculpted by a god, scars marring some of his skin, running the length of his midnight wings that when the light hit them just right, purple would show through them, as well as the veins.

Not to mention the shadows, always swirling around him, now thick in the room and still leaving lingering whispers of touch on your skin, or his eyes…

Focus.

You snapped out of your imagination, glancing up to meet his eyes, still concerned, but with a knowing, and amused, glint to them. He knew that you were absolutely enthralled with him, and he wouldn’t expect any less from his mate, an adult but still a teenage female with all sorts of hormones flooding your system because of the bond.

“I..I’m fine, just a little sore.”

He let out a hum at that, his gaze going down to your legs, still just barely trembling from your last climax. In a smooth motion, he scooped you up into his arms and began walking into the kitchen.

“I said I’m sore, not disabled!”

You said, giving him an amused but exasperated look. He returned it with a level gaze, a smile on his lips.

“I wouldn’t want you wasting any energy. You’ll need it for tonight.”

His sinfully charming voice spoke quietly, bringing a flush to your cheeks and making you shut your mouth for a good while, that familiar heat and slick that seemed ever-present these days building yet again in your body.

He sat you gently onto one of the chairs, the wood cold against your bare ass. You watched as he walked over to the stove, not bothering to throw any clothing on, and began making some food.

The smell of breakfast filled the kitchen as he scrambled eggs, and fried bacon, and threw a few pieces of bread into the toaster. Your gaze quickly wandered to the curve of his ass, how it sloped down into his muscular thighs, and hanging down between them…

“Here,”

He spoke quietly, still startling you out of your thoughts, which seemed to be a common occurrence these days. He lifted you up, sitting in the chair before setting you down on his lap. Your eyes glazed over with lust and you whined, shifting to grind down against him, you felt his cock twitch, and his body tense, but he only shook his head, picking up your fork with one hand and offering you a bite of scrambled eggs, his other hand holding your hips still.

“Patience, love. You can have me again after breakfast.”

That statement sent a bit of embarrassment through your veins. You could barely even control your own body and thoughts, all consumed by him, and were so terribly impatient. You huffed, not feeling much like his equal in this moment as you leaned against his chest, taking the eggs into your mouth, chewing and swallowing, before giving him a bite of eggs from his plate.

“I know, but I can’t help it. Not with the bond and..everything.”

He slowly chewed his food, looking down at you thoughtfully, your embarrassment probably palpable through the bond, which only further increased it.

“It’s nothing to be ashamed of.”

He reassured you after swallowing. You sighed, fork dropping from your hand with a clatter onto his plate.

“But it feels like it is. You always turn me into an absolute puddle and take care of me, and I feel like I can’t do anything for you.”

His eyes softened at your admission as he shifted your body up in his lap, so you were eye to eye with him.

“You’re already doing everything for me, being my mate, letting me have you and provide for you.”

You opened your mouth to speak again, only for a piece of bacon to be pushed inside, effectively shutting you up as you glared at him. He thought a moment, before hesitantly speaking.

“We could take a bath after this, and I could show you how to turn me into a…’puddle’?”

He offered, at which you nodded, still chewing the surprisingly good bacon. Learning how to turn the shadowsinger into an absolute mess sounded wonderful and also impossible at the same time. He was always so calm and collected that you couldn’t picture him as a mess like you always were.

*********************************************************

Azriel knew he was in trouble the moment he stepped into the warm bath, wings spreading behind him as you eagerly joined him, chest to chest as the two of you began washing each other’s bodies off, barely able to resist the hazy scent of arousal rising between you two in the air.

You were always so eager.

He found it adorable. How you were willing to do anything and everything for him, to try new things, bend over backward, both literally and figuratively, and test things. He knew you were a virgin, it had been quite obvious by how nervous and antsy you’d been, or just how sensitive and responsive you still were with him.

You whined as he slowly slid you down on his cock, throbbing again already even after the entire night’s worth of activities.

He knew the mating bond would cause a frenzy, he’d heard Feyre and Rhys talk about theirs, not to mention Nesta and Cassian who he sometimes thought were still in the midst of it when he heard their feral fucking through the walls of the House of Wind at night, or day, or any time. He’d once walked in on them in the library of all places.

But he hadn’t known just how urgent it would feel, how every muscle in his body and his shadows demanded him to be buried deep inside you, fucking and filling you over and over until he was empty.

His hands went to hold your hips as you began grinding down on him, slowly guiding you and trying to stop himself from bucking up into you.

“You want to know how to make me a mess?”

He asked, your little desperate nod confirming it. Always so eager to please. One of his scarred hands wrapped around your hand, leading it to the base of his wings.

“There. Touch me, starting on the bottom and sides, and slowly get closer and add more pressure to my pulse point in the middle.”

He instructed, his wings already flaring out as you followed his instructions, soft hands with small callouses from the training Cassian gave you roaming the very base of his wings first, on the edges of it.

His breathing grew harsher, more resembling pants, and you could’ve sworn his bottom lip trembled slightly as his eyes rolled up, hips arching into yours.

“Just like that, sweet girl, so — oh, fuck..”

He groaned, hips slowly beginning to roll into yours, making his throbbing cock rub against that heavenly spot he’d already memorized inside of you. Your movements became a bit more desperate and frenzied as your entire hand then went to hold the bottom of the base, cupping and squeezing in a way that made him jerk.

His breathing was shaky, tears pricking his eyes as Azriel, who had the patience of a god and seemingly never-ending will, began whining and begging.

“Please, right there, right - ahhh, good-“

It was so unbelievably hot seeing your stoic shadowsinger crumbling to pieces beneath your hands. As another climax rolled over your sensitive, shaking body, clenching around him, your hands moved to his pulse point, a sensitive vein in the center of the base of his wings, and squeezed, he came with a sound that you could only describe as a mix between and roar and a cry, body going limp and laying against the tub behind him as he painted your insides.

You settled against his chest, pressing kisses all over him, anywhere you could get them as he slowly recovered, eyes unglazing as he slowly blinked and caught his breath. One of his arms was wrapped around you.

Azriel wasn’t sure what must’ve come over you, but as he relaxed, he saw a hint of something in your eyes, before you leaned forward and sunk your teeth right into the sensitive skin of his neck. He’d let out an embarrassingly loud moan at it, his length immediately rising back to attention and hardening inside you.

From the way he looked down at you, eyes dark with hunger, you knew that you were in for a long night.

*********************************************************

And a long night it had been.

He’d spent hours fucking himself into you, tasting you, licking up all you had to offer with that sinful tongue of his.

It was only when you’d agreed to let him stay inside throughout the rest of the night that he’d finally gone to sleep, and you’d slept like a rock, dreamless until waking up in the morning with a dry throat.

His hair was tousled, wings and arm wrapped around you in a protective cocoon, face serene and body relaxed in sleep. It was a sight you hated to interrupt, but you needed water. You shimmied your way out of his grasp, giving him a little kiss on the forehead and mumbling something about being thirsty.

He’d groaned and seemingly went back to laying down, though not as good as when you were there.

You’d trudged off to the kitchen, body sore and aching but wanting more, and gulped down an entire glass of water when you felt a familiar nudge against your mental walls.

‘How’s my girl doing?’

Your father’s voice rang out in your head, familiar and soothing to you. You smiled to yourself while drinking another cup of water.

‘Good.’

‘You’ve been gone two full days and all you have to say is that you’re doing good?’

You snorted into the water you were drinking, a small sly smirk curling on your lips.

‘If you’re so curious,’

You began, before letting him see a quick flash of all the activities you and Azriel had been getting up to. You felt him recoil from your mind almost immediately, clearly scarred from that alone.

It was then that you heard a light, almost imperceptible patter of feet against the wood, and saw Azriel, bare as you, rubbing his eyes with one hand and stroking his cock with the other, stalking quietly towards you.

You must’ve forgotten to put your mental walls back up because you heard your father’s voice chuckling before speaking.

‘Enjoy yourself.’

He spoke simply, before fully withdrawing and your attention went to Azriel, who had a gleam of curiosity in his lust-clouded eyes.

“My dad. He was checking in on me. I’m not sure what he expected.”

You murmured, taking another sip of water as a low growl rumbled from Azriel’s chest, his lip curled up slightly and face contorted in what could only be described as territorial Fae bullshit. He huffed, clearly knowing he was ridiculous but not able to stop it.

“I don’t want any other male talking to you. Not now.”

He said with what could easily be described as a pout, coming to wrap his arms possessively around your waist from behind, wandering up to your breasts, slowly kneading them.

You sighed, leaning back against him.

“He’s my dad. He’s just worried, Az.”

He huffed again.

“I know, I just..”

“Can’t help it?”

“Yes.”

You let out a little bit of laughter at that. That was the same way you felt. Unable to help anything your mind and body wanted, which right now, was him.

His nostrils flared as he easily scented your arousal, he leaned forward, slightly pushing your body against the counter.

“Here?”

You asked, a bit exasperated. His shadows swirled around you both, slowly easing your upper half onto the counter, bending you ever so gently over it.

“I want to..try something.”

He said, voice thick with desire. You were already dripping down your legs, and his cock easily ran through your folds, settling between your legs as you whined for him to just put it in already.

“Pick a safe word.”

He said, all the while slowly easing into you. All the rabid fucking the past two days meant you didn’t even need to be stretched for him anymore, you were more than used to the mind-numbing size of him. Your mind felt blank as you tried to come up with a decent safe word, easy to say and get out. Your gaze went to the fruit bowl on the counter, and you thought of the fruit you’d offered to your mate.

“Apple.”

You said, immediately mentally facepalming at how stupid it was. Azriel only smirked and continued, inch after inch slowly sliding in. Shadows began sliding up your body, teasing your pert nipples before their forms settled on your wrists, pushing them forward, over your head, and in front of you on the counter, binding them down in a firm grip, but also careful not to hurt you as they whispered amongst themselves and to their master.

Any words that had been formed immediately fell to pieces as he began pounding into you only moments after bottoming out, moving like a rabbit in heat, desperate to fuck and fill. It was a dizzying, punishing pace he set, your hands bound above you only adding to it.

Wet squelching noises mixed with your moans and screams of him and his name, the sound of skin slapping against skin resounding as his balls hit the curve of your ass, tightening as he spilled inside of you.

He didn’t stop.

It felt like you were there for hours, bent over that counter, some shadows rubbing your clit, Azriel’s hands groping your breasts and pinching your nipples, your hands bound. You couldn’t count the number of times you fell completely apart around him, or the number of times he came.

“Mine.”

He growled, the sound of his voice so possessive and animalistic sending heat straight into your core.

“Yours, all yours.”

You managed to get out between your screams. It was too much, and he could feel it through the bond, how overwhelmed and overstimulated you were, but unless you said the safe word, he wasn’t stopping.

“T- too much, Az, I can’t-“

“Yes, you can,”

His voice had growled out, pace somehow getting more frenzied and sloppy.

“You can take it, just one more, I know you can.”

You took one more somehow, your body feeling heavy and overwhelmed with heat. You whined, wriggling underneath him. He only glanced down at you, hand now in your dark curls, and spoke.

“One more.”

*********************************************************

His wet mouth came up from between your legs, his tongue darting out to lick his lips and clean off your remaining essence.

Azriel ate pussy like a starved man, licking and sucking everything he could, lapping it all up until you were falling apart around his tongue over and over. He saw your fucked out look and smiled softly, something that made your heart warm, before he slid up next to you on the bed.

He cradled your body against him, pressing wet kisses to your forehead. Your face was scrunched up in what looked like a thoughtful frown as you glanced up at him, a flush creeping up your cheeks. He tilted his head to the side a bit as curiosity took over.

“What is it?”

He asked quietly, clearly wondering if something was wrong or anything. You opened your mouth, closing it again, before just blurting it out.

“Can you teach me how to suck dick?”

You asked, wincing at the sting of embarrassment from you that had probably gone down the bond to him. His eyes widened a bit before he seemed to think. Thinking badly of his silence, you just began stammering.

“I mean, you don’t have to, it’s just you’re always-“

“I’ll teach you.”

His calm voice, holding both desire and affection in it, cut through your sentence as he looked down at you.

He leaned back, adjusting the pillows behind him, and gently spread his legs for you to access. He gestured to between his legs, and you shifted there and settled, eyes on his cock, already hardening again.

“Stroke it first, to get it ready.”

He said, his hand guiding yours to his length, gently wrapping your fingers around it.

“How do I…?”

You asked, trailing off as his hand covered yours, making your hand slowly go back and forth, gently twisting and pulling on the thin, sensitive skin. He guided your thumb to swipe over his slit, then have your hands softly palm the head while he groaned softly.

“Like that, just keep doing that until it’s hard.”

He murmured to you, giving a nod of approval as his hand then drifted off to lay on the bed beside him as he leaned back, and loosely watched you.

It was a learning curve, for sure.

You tried to mimic the motions he’d made on it earlier, and after a few minutes of fumbling, you got a basic rhythm of stroking it up and down, lightly squeezing and stimulating the head. You watched his every reaction, even as precum beaded at the tip, you swiped it away with your thumb.

You followed through with that until it was stiff and firm as a rock, slapping against his stomach when you finally let your hand slip off of it.

“Now what?”

You asked, watching as Azriel then took his cock in one hand and pumped it a few times, before his other hand went to cup your cheek, gently pulling you closer between his legs.

“Give the tip a few licks, maybe a kiss or some light sucking, and hold the base with your hand and stroke it while doing that.”

He instructed you. Your hand went to hold the base of his cock, lightly squeezing and stroking it in the familiar rhythm. You hesitantly put your mouth to his cock, first your tongue only darting out to give little kitten licks against his slit, and a few kisses. After a moment of figuring this out, you then took the red, leaking head into your mouth, tongue swirling around it as you lightly sucked. It was just like sucking a lollipop, you supposed, as you eagerly suckled on it, cheeks hollowing out, except it was a bit salty and smelled musky.

Azriel groaned at that, hips almost bucking up before he stopped them.

“Good girl,”

He purred, one hand sliding into your hair, and ever so gently tugging you further onto it.

“Your tongue — lick the underside of it.”

He managed to gasp out, breathless as you followed his instructions almost perfectly, tongue flattening and rubbing against the underside of his dick. You simply looked up at him with those bright blue eyes, eager for more instructions, eager to please and satisfy him; to satisfy your mate.

His hand on your hair guided you to move your head forward and backward, gently bobbing as you suckled and licked him. Within no time his words turned to strained groans, especially when he guided one of your hands to tenderly squeeze and play with his balls.

His eyes had gone watery by then, and with a sharp cry, he came in your mouth, and not knowing what to do, you lapped it up with your tongue and swallowed.

You slipped your mouth off of him, and his legs remained open as he tried to work through his orgasm. You crawled up next to him in the bed, settling under the warm blankets, and pulling his body close, nuzzling into him and taking in his scent deeply. It was a mixture of pine and rich earth, delicious to your senses in every way.

When he’d finally recovered enough to speak without ever word coming out a whimper, he turned on his side to you and his arms moved on their own, wrapping around you and pulling you tight against him, one of his wings draping over you. It was as if to cover your naked body so that none could see the beauty that was you other than him.

“Did I do it right?”

You asked, whispering the question into his ear. He chuckled, the deep sound vibrating through his chest and your being.

“You did it perfectly.”

He replied, voice tired but satisfied, the mating bond content enough to let the both of you sleep without any further frenzy activities.

With a sigh of satisfaction, he rested his head against the top of yours, breathing in and smelling the shampoo and conditioner, and all of the haircare products you use. The thought made him smile.

“I love you.”

The shadowsinger said softly. He felt you smile against his skin before speaking just as soft and quiet as him.

“I love you, too.”

Tags:

@marvelsmylife

@mischiefmanagers

@lilah-asteria

#acotar fandom #acotar fanfiction #writers on tumblr #acotar x reader #azriel #azriel acotar #azriel x reader #azriel x rhys’daughter #azriel comfort #azriel smut #azriel x you #azriel fluff #mating frenzy #sub azriel

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readychilledwine · 3 months

Note

Okay, I have a request for you that is no pressure, but Reader enjoys praise loves when she is being acknowledged for doing good and being good but doesn't know how to accept but their lover(and I have no idea would best fit this. My heart says Cassian, but realistically, it's probably Az or Eris) talks them through it shows them they don't need to be flustered.

Please ignore if this makes no sense

Self Worth

Summary - Cassian can't stand seeing you so low

Warnings - insecure reader, praise, mentions of mental health slipping

A/N - just a little baby fic of how Cassian would handle his mate needing her self-esteem and self worth built up 💕

✨️Cassian Masterlist✨️General Masterlist✨️

"Look me in my eyes and tell me the female I love isn't good enough again," Cassian was being as gentle as he could. You were shying away from him, eager for his praise, but instantly falling into that shell the second he gave it. "Look me in my eyes and tell me why the female I love cannot look at me after I tell her how beautiful she is today."

"I-" The words died on your tongue. No excuse you could find would appease him. No excuse would make him forgive you for whispering to him that you weren't enough. Weren't brave enough, pretty enough, strong enough. You saw the way he admired Nesta and Feyre. The way he admired Mor.

You didn't see the way he looked at you, though. He looked at you as if you had made the very world, as if you had forged him to be exactly how you needed him to be. You pushed him yo be that male, pushed him to be better. To be good. You made Cassian see the beauty in the world, the beauty in others. Perhaps that is why it hurt him that you could not see the beauty in you.

"I just never feel like I'm doing enough. Like there's no way you want me, want my body, want me to be-"

"Stop," he interrupted you immediately. He hid the break in his voice so well, hid how just a few words instantly shattered his heart. "You're struggling again, aren't you angel?" His eyes studied you hard as you nodded silently. "Y/n, you've been working so hard for Rhys, being the perfect emissary. You single handedly started the process of him and Tamlin creating a trade route, of him and Dawn beginning a joint training program between the Peregryn and Illyrians. Angel, you are doing so well and working so hard."

Your chest started to feel heavy, breathing becoming rapid, and Cassian instantly put his hands on your upper arms. He began to exaggerate his breathing, forcing you to follow it and calm down. "You are beautiful, you are special, you are kind. You are my mate, Y/n. You will never have to worry about competition or me not loving a single inch of you. I am proud to be yours. Proud you wanted me."

You looked up at Cassian, eyes lined in tears, "Really? You don't wish I was a.. a fighter?"

He laughed softly, "If you could fight, why would you need me? My job is to protect you. Physically, emotionally, and mentally. Even if that means protecting you from yourself." He leaned in and kissed your forehead. "You are beautiful. Say it for me."

"I-" You paused, taking a deep breath. "I am beautiful."

Cassian's smile grew, "Good job, angel. Tell me five things you love about you."

You bit your lip thinking, "My eyes," he groaned in pleasure at that answer. "My humor," he whispered yes softly. "My butt-"

"Fuck yes your ass," Cassian turned you quickly to smack it before turning you around. "Continue."

You giggled at him, "My kindness," he shut his eyes smiling. "And... I think.."

"No. Not think. You know you love this last thing. Tell me again," he demanded.

You nodded more confidently, "I love my smile." Cassian held your face in his hands again. "Because when I smile, you smile, then I smile more."

"Seeing you glowing and happy makes me happy," he said. "Every day we do 5 things you love about you, then I'm going to spend the day praising them until that self Worth gets back up again, okay angel?"

"Okay, Cassie."

General Taglist:

@hnyclover @glitterypirateduck @slytherinindisguise @mischiefmanagers @bloodicka @starsinyourseyes @the-sweet-psycho @mariahoedt @rinalouu @sarawritestories @starryhiraeth @starswholistenanddreamsanswered @cumuluscranium @loneliestluvr @eternallyelvish @azrielsmate3 @daughterofthemoons-stuff @meritxellao @aria-chikage @hungryforbatboys @lilah-asteria @fandomrejects @sleepybesson @tayswhp @itsswritten @milswrites

#elizabeths.updates #send asks #acotar #acotar x reader #acotar fanfiction #cassian x reader #cassian x you #cassian x y/n #cassian of illyria #lord of bloodshed #cassian fic

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azrielslittleslut · 3 months

Note

love your stories and I'm glad you're back 😍 so I just have to ask about one of your promsts. I was thinking of 26 with Azriel. Maybe he wants to show someone (reader's ex) that reader is now his. So it can be pretty spicy 🤭

#26- "We're in public, you know."

Azriel x Reader

Warnings: 18+, not super smutty but it's spicy, sexual tension, mention of a toxic relationship but it's not described, pet names, slight language, possessive!Az

Word Count: 945

Prompt List

a/n: thank you for your kind words, anon! i'm so glad to be back, and i hope you enjoy this!

The music at Rita’s was abnormally loud, the deep bass of the music vibrating in your bones as you danced with Azriel. The lights were low, creating an intimate ambiance throughout the room. The dance floor was full of people, and you laughed as you saw Mor swinging around a flustered Emerie.

“I don’t think Emerie likes dancing that much,” you murmur to Azriel, leaning back against his muscular chest as you sway your hips to the beat.

You hear his low chuckle in your ear as he says, “Too bad Mor loves it.” His grip tightens on your waist, pulling you farther back against him. “You look divine tonight, angel.” His voice was dark, clouded with desire.

You smiled, thankful you had picked the outfit you did. It was dark green; a color you knew complemented your skin tone and made your eyes pop. It was skin-tight, the sides open and completely see-through. You could feel Azriel's warm hand against your skin through the lace as his fingers tightened on your hips.

"I'm glad you like it," you purr, spinning around to face him. You throw your arms around his neck as you lean up and press a kiss to his lips. "I wore it just for you."

He groans as he starts to gracefully lay of trail of kisses down your neck as you dance. You tip your head back slightly, your eyes scanning the people standing along the far wall before closing them-

"Damn it," you hiss, pushing Azriel away as you see who is leaning against the bar. Your ex was there, and you felt a sense of unease washing through you under their gaze.

Memories flashed through your mind, taking you back to a time when you felt trapped and stuck, unable to escape the prison they had locked you in.

That was until Azriel had found you and saved you, bringing you out of that cold darkness and into his loving embrace.

"Hmm," Azriel murmured, leaning down to press his forehead against yours. "It seems we have an audience." He locked eyes with your ex as he curved his lips up into a seductive smile. "Shall we put on a show?"

A rush of heat flooded through your veins as you realized what he meant. "We're in public, you know." You murmur as you press your body even closer to his, your hips starting to sway with the music again.

Azriel spins you around and pulls your ass back against his hips, and you gasp at the feeling of his hard cock against you. "I don't care," he whispers as he starts to run his hands along your body, tracing the curves there. "I want them to know who you belong to now."

You nod as you lean your head back against his shoulder. The music suddenly changed, the beat slowing down to a seductive tone that gave you enough confidence to say, "Okay."

His shadows curl possessively around you as his hands start a teasing trail down your body, his hands resting on your hips. He moved them to the rhythm of the music, his hips grinding into yours in slow, deliberate motions.

You tilt your head back to expose your neck to him, and he starts to kiss your tender skin. They were hot and demanding, leaving a trail of fire in their wake. You arch into him, moving your hands up to his hair, tangling your fingers in his black locks.

The music changed again, the beat became something that sounded primal. His movements grew bolder as he slid a hand down to cup your ass, squeezing it roughly. As he moved, you could feel the evidence of his arousal against you, and you moaned as desire flooded your veins.

You didn't care that you were on a packed dance floor in the middle of a crowded bar. You wanted him. You wanted everyone to know that you were his and he was yours.

Azriel chuckled, his breath dancing across your neck. "Do you feel how much I want you?" he asked in that deep voice of his.

You nod, your breath hitching as you feel his scarred fingers slide under the hem of your tight clothes. He trails them up your thighs, his nails digging into your flesh.

With his other hand, he moves it up to wrap around your throat, squeezing lightly. He roughly pulls your head to the side, capturing your lips in a passionate kiss.

It wasn’t sweet or gentle. It was dominating, and it spoke of possession and desire, causing you to moan against his mouth.

As the music reaches a crescendo, Azriel finally touches you where you want him the most, running his fingers across your sensitive flesh with deliberate strokes.

You gasp against his mouth, body trembling with need. His touch was bold and confident because he knew how to drive you wild.

Slowly, you open your eyes, meeting the gaze of your ex. Offering them a sex-addled smile, you focus on Azriel, on his hands claiming and worshipping your body.

“You’re mine,” he growled, his voice low. “Not theirs. Mine.”

“Yes,” you breathe, arching into his body as he teases you.

With a final possessive kiss, he pulls back just enough to meet your eyes. His gaze is dark, full of lust and desire. "Let’s take this somewhere more private, love."

You find yourself nodding, your body tingling, and your skin burning, wanting more of his touch. You let him lead you off the dance floor with his strong arms wrapped protectively around you, leaving no doubt in anyone's mind, especially your ex's, that you belonged to him.

#azriel #acotar fanfiction #azriel shadowsinger #azriel spymaster #a court of thorns and roses #acotar #azriel x reader #azriel fanfic #azriel smut #dee writes #azriel x you

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cressidagrey · 23 days

Text

Looked to the Sky - Chapter 12

Summary:

Eira Archeron was neither a Valkyrie, nor a Seer, nor the High Lady of the Night Court. She was, however, Azriel‘s mate with her own mysterious, untrained powers.

Also known as: Azriel tries to court his mate the human way.

Warnings:

THIS IS THE LIGHTNING IN A BOTTLE SEQUEL! SO READ THAT FIRST IF YOU WANNA READ THIS ONE OTHERWISE THIS MAKES NO SENSE!

Elain Bashing, Low Self Esteem, Burns, Discussion of suicidal thoughts (If this triggers you, PLEASE don't read it), Discussion of very "human" ideas of modesty, and without @k-godling this would have never happened.

(super pretty dividers by @tsunami-of-tears)

“I can hear your fucking thoughts, even though I am not a daemati, so talk to me, Az,” Cassian grumbled.

Azriel turned his head, ceasing to stare at the ceiling as he had been doing for hours.

He couldn't get Eira's words out of his head. He hated the images her words had conjured up in his head — his sweet mate sitting in her bathing chamber, rocking back and forth, holding herself as tight as she could, trying to block everything out.

His mate, who had wanted to die.

The very thought was enough to make him want to break something, to find something to punch and claw at until his knuckles bled and his skin lay in tattered scraps. Until his rage and agony burned the images out of his mind, until he wasn't so sick to his stomach that he was half-convinced he was going to physically get ill.

"Stop thinking," Cassian said, still watching him with a grim expression that mirrored his own thoughts.

Azriel didn't bother answering him. Right now, he didn't even want to be here in this room. He didn't want to lie on this bed, staring at the ceiling, when he could be with his Eira.

His sweet, sweet mate, who would have hurled herself off a balcony or cut off her ears because it had all just...been too much.

Even the mere thought made his stomach lurch as if he was going to be sick. Gods, she had wanted to die, and he hadn't noticed. He hadn't known.

He had walked around, blissfully oblivious, thinking that she was better, that she was settling into life here as a High Fae, when she…

She hadn't told him, she hadn't said a damn thing, and he should have known from the start, should've known that she wasn't okay.

He should have paid more attention, should've pushed harder when she seemed upset, and instead, he'd just...he had just left her to struggle on her own when he should have...he should have...

She hadn't told him, she hadn't said a damn thing, and he should have known from the start, should've known that she wasn't okay.

“Talk to me, Az. Please."

He closed his eyes, trying to stop himself from thinking, and he could still see her, sitting in her bathing chamber, rocking back and forth, humming so she wouldn't have to listen, and he didn't even know for how long she had been doing that right under his nose, how much pain she had been in and how he had just let her...

"I should have known," he said quietly, the confession almost ripped out of him.

Cassian just listened.

"She's my mate. I should have known how she was feeling."

Cassian didn't say anything this time. He just watched him silently for a moment, the concerned look on his face still there.

"And how were you supposed to know?" he said finally. "If she didn't want you to know? If she didn't want to tell you?" Cassian sighed. "I didn't know how bad Nesta was feeling either. Is this about her sparks show when Eira talked to Elain?" he asked her.

Azriel grimaced.

"No," he said firmly. "I just...I couldn't get Eira's comment about stuffing cotton wool into her ears out of my brain. So I asked her," he admitted quietly. "She was...she was doing really badly for a bit," he admitted weakly. It was an understatement.

She had almost hurt herself, had wanted to kill herself instead of dealing with all of this, and he should have known. He should have-

"How can I have been so blind and stupid?" he grumbled more quietly.

"You're not stupid," Cassian retorted instantly. "And you're certainly not blind."

Azriel let out a scoff.

"Then how did I not notice?" he demanded. "How did I not notice that my own mate was...?"

"You're not stupid," Cassian said.

"Yes I am," Azriel snapped back. "I am stupid and a bastard, for not noticing, for not seeing how she felt," he said angrily.

Cassian let out a sharp huff at his words, watching him with an almost frustrated expression.

"None of us saw," Cassian snapped.

The door opened.

"I can hear you arguing," Rhys grumbled as he made his way across the room and flopped down on the bed.

"What's with Feyre?" Cassian asked with some bemusement.

"Feyre decided she would rather have a sleepover with Nesta and Eira," Rhys said with a long-suffering sigh.

Azriel couldn't help the brief hint of a smile at Rhys's words.

"Are you upset that she deserted you?" he asked dryly.

Rhys shot him a weak glare at his words. "I would like my mate to sleep in my bed, yes," he grumbled.

"You sound like a lovesick whelp," Cassian commented, and Rhys muttered something in response, that sounded strangely like oh, like you are any better.

Azriel made a low scoffing sound, a faint, but genuine smile touching his lips.

It vanished again a moment later, as the thoughts about Eira came rushing back.

"I don't understand how I didn't see," he muttered under his breath, more to himself than anyone else. "I am such an idiot."

He could feel their gazes turning towards him again, but he didn't bother looking up, still staring at the ceiling, as he clenched his fist around the now-crumpled bedsheets.

"I just...I should have known," he said again. "We are mates. How could I have been so damn blind?"

"How could I have been so blind either?" Cassian asked. "Neither of Feyre, nor Nesta, nor Eira like to burden other people with their problems. Neither of us are mind readers...well other than Rhys."

Rhys let out a low scoff but didn't disagree.

Cassian had a point, but that didn't make Azriel feel any better.

"I still feel like a bastard for not seeing," he muttered.

It was his job to observe. It was literally his entire shtick. How could he not have seen that his own mate was suffering.

"Is it about the cotton wool comment?" Rhys asked quietly.

Azriel let out another huff, this time out of annoyance.

"Yes, it's about the damn cotton wool," he said harshly. "I just can't get the image out of my head. My mate, sitting in her bathing chamber, holding herself like a damn child while she rocks back and forth, listening to herself hum and trying to block everything out."

"She was pulling on her ears at the same time," Rhys said, his voice dark. "I saw a piece of it when I...accidentally went into her mind. She pulled at her ears because they were too long and too pointy and not hers. And then she bit her mouth bloody. It was... bad."

Azriel grimaced at those words, that image conjured up again, in even more detail this time.

He still couldn't quite get a grip on what he was feeling, with each moment that passed. He felt sick to his stomach, enraged, like he wanted to find something to punch, wanted to rip apart with his bare hands. He felt helpless and useless, like he had failed his mate, failed to protect her.

"She said she wanted to throw herself off a goddamn balcony," he said quietly.

Rhys grimaced, and even Cassian's expression darkened.

"She was that bad..." he said quietly. "...How did...how did we not notice?"

"Because she didn't want us to notice," Cassian pointed out.

"I should've still noticed," Azriel snapped back. "I could have...I should have known that she was struggling."

There was a long moment of absolute silence, all of them just staring at the ceiling, probably running through the same thoughts as he did.

Then Rhys let out a sigh, closing his eyes as he spoke.

"How are we so damn incompetent sometimes?"

"Beats the hell out of me," Cassian said. "All three of us are supposed to be at least halfway competent, and you know, not total assholes. We should have known. We should have picked up the goddamn clues."

"And we didn't," Azriel said, his words coming out as a low growl that was almost lost in his chest. "And instead of...of helping her, of being there, she...she dealt with it all on her own, and we just stood around, blundering about like idiots."

His words were met with another moment of silence before Cassian let out a long sigh. "She is alright now, though, right?" he pointed out.

"She's not having thoughts of throwing herself off a damn balcony or cutting her ears off anymore," Azriel said gruffly. "So things have improved at least somewhat. Which I am very, very thankful for."

"So we know that at least," Rhys grumbled. "She's not having those thoughts anymore, at least not right now...although I certainly don’t like that it took her wanting to cut her ears off or throw herself off a balcony to get to this point."

Azriel let out another huff of annoyance.

"I just..." he began and took a deep breath. "It shouldn't have had to get so bad to begin with. We should have seen her struggling, damn it."

"Which we didn't," Cassian said again.

Another moment of silence, where they just laid around the bed, all of them staring at the ceiling, their thoughts going in the same circles. Azriel didn't know if it was a comfort, knowing that the others were feeling almost the same thing he was feeling, or if it was just making everything even worse, the knowledge that there were three of them — three strong, powerful males — and they had still all been so damn blind.

"How's your hand?" Rhys asked him suddenly

Azriel blinked.

"My hand?" he repeated dully, "It's fine," he grumbled. "I don't even feel it. Eira feels horrible though."

"Of course she does," Rhys agreed. "First her powers manifested and burnt a couple of Darkbringers to a crisp...and now her powers hurt you. Her mate." Rhys sighed. "I wish she would see the lightning as something beautiful and not something she must be afraid of," he muttered.

"She will," Azriel said firmly. "One day. She just...she just needs time. It's all still so fresh to her."

He had the feeling it was going to be a very long time before his mate would fully accept her own powers. "She needs to get used to them," he said quietly. "She needs to get used to the fact that she has powers to begin with. Just the idea...it's a lot for her."

"Understatement," Cassian grumbled under his breath. "Especially when you spent 3 years being treated like you were utterly useless like we did."

Azriel winced internally at the words.

It was their fault. They had done that.

The silence that fell after that statement was so deafening, that Azriel swore he could hear it.

They had done that. Eira's self-worth...or lack thereof, her feelings of uselessness and weakness...it was all their fault. And knowing that...knowing how damn useless and shitty they had been, knowing everything his mate had gone through, knowing just how much Eira had struggled, all while they had just blundered about like total idiots, it was a hard pill to swallow.

"How are you feeling about Elain now?" Cassian wondered.

Azriel stiffened slightly at the question.

He...he didn't really know.

Part of him wanted to strangle her, because of everything she had said, everything she had said about his mate.

"I think the worst part...the worst part is the betrayal of it," Azriel said quietly. "She did it to get revenge. Because I turned her down."

Cassian grumbled under his breath at that, and Rhys let out a low scoff of agreement.

"She basically just hurt your mate as revenge for you turning her down," Cassian said, disgust clear in his voice.

Rhys grimaced. "I am sorry, Az," he apologised and Azriel knew why he apologised. Because without Rhys’ order, he wouldn't have stopped....he would have kept pursuing Elain.

Azriel closed his eyes for a moment, forcing a deep breath into his lungs, and trying to push down the anger that rose up at the memory.

"It's not your fault, though," he said quietly. "It's Elain's." That...that was a hard truth.

It was not Rhys's fault. He had no way of knowing this would happen.

All the blame lay with Elain.

"Elain's and her alone," Azriel said, and let out a long, slow breath.

It didn't make him hate Elain any less, though, that was for damn sure.

"I can tell how furious you are," Rhys said dryly, and Azriel let out a low snort.

"That obvious?" he grumbled.

"Oh, you're not exactly subtle," Rhys said dryly. "You're practically grinding your teeth."

"I feel like grinding Elain's face into the floor too," Azriel said lowly and very, very darkly. "And I don't even think that will make me feel any better."

"Let's talk about something nicer," Cassian said quickly. "How's that courting going?"

Azriel blinked at the change in topic, Cassian's question taking a couple of seconds to register.

"Uh...fine," he said after a moment. "Good."

He tried to think about their walks in Velaris, about picnics in the back garden…and not about the image of his mate sitting rocking back and forth in her bathing chamber, pulling at her new, pointed ears and biting her own mouth bloody.

"You sound certain," Cassian teased him and he rolled his eyes.

"I am pretty sure I keep messing it all up because if we actually were human we wouldn't even be allowed in the same room as each other without a chaperone," he said drily. Alone the thought about marrying another person, of spending the rest of his life with them, when he didn’t even have a private conversation with them once…was utterly foreign to him.

But then, maybe it shouldn’t be. Some Illyrian customs were not any better at all. Just more violent.

Rhys let out a low chuckle before he said amused.

“I am sure you made up for that with the sheer amount of birthday presents you gave her,” Rhys quipped with some amusement.

"That were the shadows," he protested weakly.

She deserved them, the shadows said evenly, not bothering to defend themselves. And the next thing you need to do is find a House and a Ring, Master.

Azriel choked on his own spit.

"What was that, Shadowsinger?" Rhys asked dryly, and Azriel grimaced.

"Nothing," he said quickly and tried to keep his face a neutral as possible. "My shadows are just chatting, that's all."

Cassian and Rhys exchanged a long look before Rhys spoke again. "Your shadows are 'chatting' about what, exactly?" Rhys asked, the corners of his mouth twitching slightly now.

Azriel cursed silently under his breath.

"About nothing important," he lied and tried to sound as relaxed as possible, all the while silently praying to any God listening, that Cassian or Rhys would drop it.

They didn’t.

They just looked expectantly at him.

Azriel cursed silently under his breath.

"A House and a Ring," he grumbled. He could hear some of the shadows laughing.

Another long, dead silence fell, and Azriel squeezed his eyes shut again, knowing all too well that his friends were about to make fun of him ruthlessly.

"A House and a ring," Rhys repeated faintly.

Cassian let out a snort of laughter.

"Oh, shut up," Azriel grumbled, refusing to open his eyes again, knowing he would probably see Rhys and Cassian rolling around on the bed with laughter.

"Oh, no, we will absolutely not shut up," Rhys said, and Azriel could hear the smile in his voice. "Because you're thinking of marriage already, aren't you?"

"The books said that 6 months from courtship to a wedding was not unusual," Azriel defended himself.

That earned another loud burst of laughter from Cassian, and Rhys took in a deep breath before he replied, his voice still filled with stifled laughter.

"Oh, yes, six months sounds completely reasonable," Rhys promised him earnestly.

There was another long moment of silence, where Azriel could feel the smirk on Rhys's face without even opening his eyes before Rhys spoke again. "But you are aware that you need to actually propose first, right?"

"Apparently I need the house for that," Azriel said drily. "I am supposed to show that I can provide a place where we can live after the wedding."

"Yes, of course," Rhys said, the very picture of false agreement. "How could I ever suggest otherwise?”

Despite his best efforts, Azriel couldn't hold back a low growl at the amusement in Rhys's voice. Cassian just laughed.

"I need to admit though, humans do it very...interestingly. They apparently don't even have a private conversation for 6 months before, before they ask the female to marry them and then immediately share a bed for the first time." Rhys said with a snort. "Though I guess it's not much different than what Keir wanted to do to Mor."

Another growl tore itself out of Azriel's throat at that reminder.

"Don't," he ground out, "don't even mention that old bastard's name in my presence," he warned, anger bubbling up inside him at the memory of what Keir had done. Not even to just Mor, but to Eira as well.

"Though there is one thing you need to think about," Cassian said drily. "Everything Eira was taught about relationships and sex was the human way."

That managed to make Azriel go still all over, an uncomfortable sensation spreading through his entire chest, while a dark, cold feeling settled in his stomach.

And to make things even worse, Rhys continued with the same dry and far, far too gleeful tone, "Meaning that she willlikely expect you to wait for marriage."

He swallowed. "Then we wait," he said sharply. "I am not going to force her."

"No, of course you won't," Cassian said, suddenly a lot more serious. "We know you would never do that. But Eira probably has some...ideas of how a marriage would work. She seems to be the one of her sisters that still…clings to that the most. She was raised to be a wife, Azriel. She’ll think that your word is law.”

Despite still keeping his eyes closed, Azriel winced at those words. He had already thought about that. He had thought of that fact very heavily.

It was reminding him far too much of Illyria for his peace of mind, to be honest. The idea that he has a male was supposed to have any kind of power over his wife, that she was chattel for him to rule over…It was making him nauseous.

He...he didn't like it at all. Eira thought that he would demand things from her...order her into things... but the idea made him want to punch something.

"Well, she won't think that," Rhys suddenly said, his voice sounding a lot more serious than before.

Azriel slowly opened his eyes at that and glanced at his friend, only to find Rhys's expression had hardened and was looking more...determined than amused.

"She will quickly learn that you will never order her to do anything," Rhys said firmly, and Cassian nodded in agreement.

Azriel just stared for a moment, his chest feeling a lot looser than before and his heart suddenly beating a lot faster.

Cassian and Rhys...they believed it wholeheartedly.

They didn't even doubt one second that he would never demand anything from his mate, from his sweet, gentle, quiet mate, who had been raised to listen and obey.

"You're our brother," Cassian said then, and Azriel's eyes suddenly shot to him. "We've known you for five centuries, and we know that you would rather cut off your own wings than demand anything of Eira."

Rhys nodded.

"We don't doubt for a second that you would never, ever, order her to do anything,"

A wave of gratefulness and grateful love for his brothers washed over Azriel all at once.

They understood.

They knew him. Knew that he would never order his mate to do a damn thing. Knew that the very idea of ordering her was more than enough to make him feel physically ill.

"So about that house..."

Azriel let out a huff at that question.

"I'm working on it," he said but was cut off by another snigger from Cassian.

***

"Scoot over," Feyre demanded in a whisper as she crawled into the bed next to her.

"I thought you would stay with Rhys?" Eira asked, but did as her youngest sister requested, careful not to bother a sleeping Nesta.

There was still light in the room, courtesy of the faelight, neither of them felt comfortable in a pitch-black room since the cauldron.

Feyre just grumbled something unintelligible under her breath at that as she settled in next to her sister, pressing up against Eira.

Eira smiled a little and shuffled on the bed, gently wrapping her arms around Feyre when the latter snuggled close, burying her face against her neck.

"Nyx seems to think that Ra Ra gives the best cuddles. I need some of those," she said, making Eira giggle.

"Of course he does," Eira said, pulling her sister even closer. "Ra Ra is an excellent cuddler."

Feyre bit back the laughter so as not to wake Nesta and caught Eira's hand in hers. "How are you feeling?"

Eira just hummed, trying to figure out the best way to answer that question and finding it far more complicated than it should be.

"I feel...." she started, letting out a long breath as she thought about it. "I feel...I feel better. Still hurt. I don't think that will go away any time soon...but...better."

Feyre nodded slowly as if she had expected the answer.

"I can understand that," Feyre said, playing with her hand and then froze. "Eira, did you make a bargain?"

Eira blinked at the question, a pit opening in her stomach.

"A...a bargain?" she echoed numbly, and Feyre raised an eyebrow at her.

"Yes. A bargain," Feyre said, and tugged her hand up, so Eira could see Right there wrapped around the ring finger of her left hand, right where a wedding ring would sit, was a thin black band. Just that it wasn't a band. It was a bargain marking.

Eira stared at it numbly, and for a second, she just stared at it, feeling like she couldn't get any air into her lungs.

The bargain marking was wrapped around her finger, and the only person it could have come from was...

Azriel.

Her mate. That...that was her mate's bargain marking wrapped around her finger.

"Eira...?"

Some part of her was suddenly very glad that Feyre was there with her, because her sister's voice was the only thing that was keeping her at all grounded, and it took several long, shaky, breaths before she could force words out of her suddenly very tight throat.

"Y-yes, I...I made a b-bargain," Eira whispered.

"Accidentally, wasn't it?" Nesta said suddenly turning around. "You two can never manage to be quiet," she mumbled with a yawn. "What are the terms?"

"Yes, accidentally," Eira admitted, and Nesta nodded.

"Thought so," she said dryly, her voice only slightly slurred with sleep. "And the terms?"

Eira swallowed again.

"That I would come to him if I...whenever I have a bad day. The same goes for him."

That seemed to get the attention of both of her younger sisters, Feyre tensing against her and even Nesta's eyes grew a little wider.

"That's...a very loose bargain," Feyre said slowly, and Eira nodded.

"It...it was," she said, "It wasn't on purpose. It was just...just a promise."

"What exactly does it mean when you have a bad day?" Nesta asked her evenly.

Eira opened her mouth to answer but suddenly found that she really, really didn’t want to tell her sisters about the complete breakdown she had had earlier.

"Just.." she mumbled after a moment. "Bad."

Nesta's gaze sharpened.

"What does that mean, bad?" she demanded, the tone leaving no room for arguing.

Eira swallowed again, the fear of the consequences if she told her sisters suddenly growing inside of her.

"T-tired. Like everything is too much." she said, her voice breaking just a little bit as the memory of how much she had cried suddenly crashed down on her, "Or-or I...remember things. Like...like the war," she managed. "And I...I don't feel good. I feel...I feel like I did...after the cauldron. Everything is overwhelming. Everything hurts. I just want it all to stop."

Feyre's arms tightened around her, and Nesta's eyes grew very, very sharp.

"Do you...do you ever...try to hurt yourself?" Nesta asked softly, not quite managing to keep the concern out of her voice.

Eira's eyes widened at that, and she swallowed, shaking her head violently.

"Not...Not anymore," she whispered.

The concern in Nesta's eyes only grew, and she let out a small, shaky breath. "But you...you did?" she asked softly.

Eira just nodded silently, her voice having gone too weak to even speak. "Afte the cauldron...I...used to...sometimes I bit my mouth bloody. Not on purpose!" she assured her sisters. "I just...If I didn't, I was going to be too loud. And I pulled on my hair and my ears but it wasn't..."

A long, long moment of heavy, tension-filled silence fell as Eira spoke, and she bit her lip to keep herself from crying again.

Until Feyre suddenly spoke again, her voice very, very low and very angry.

"How often? How often are your bad days?"

"Not...not often," Eira mumbled, closing her eyes again, because she could literally feel the anger emanating off of Feyre, her normally gentle sister holding onto her tight with a grip that bordered on pain. "And it's really not that bad," she tried to assure them both. "Really. I...I..It's gotten better. The shadows keep me company now when I have nightmares and then it's not..."

"How. Often?" Feyre demanded, her tone leaving no room for arguing. Eira had never, ever, heard her sister use that tone of voice.

"I don't know," she whispered, the words falling out of her mouth seemingly on their own. "A couple of times a month? It used to be more. After the war, it was nearly every day."

A sharp, sharp intake of breath came from Feyre, who pressed closer to her as if trying to keep her from disappearing.

"You...You never told us," Feyre breathed out, and it was clear how hard it was for her not to just...break down and cry. "Why...why didn't you come to us?" Feyre questioned gently, and Eira closed her eyes, feeling herself tearing up at the broken tone in Feyre's voice.

And that...that just made it worse. Her sisters...they were her sisters. She was supposed to tell them when things were bad when she had a bad day. She was supposed to tell them.

"I...I didn't want to worry you," she whispered, and Feyre let out a shaky breath.

"It's our job to worry about you, you idiot," Feyre whispered, pulling her closer and wrapping her arms around her tightly. "You're supposed to tell us," Feyre muttered against her shoulder. "You're supposed to come and find us and we're supposed to hug you and comfort you."

A soft huff came from Nesta, and suddenly one of her hands gently stroked over her hair.

"Next time you have a bad day," Nesta said, tone leaving no room for arguing, "You tell us. Do you understand?"

"I am pretty sure I am supposed to tell Azriel," she protested weakly.

"You can tell him along with us," Feyre said firmly, gently tugging on her hair. "No keeping secrets from your family."

"Absolutely no keeping secrets from us," Nesta agreed. "If we find out you've had a bad day and haven't told us, I'll drag you to training with me."

Eira huffed out a weak chuckle at that because that was a very real threat if Nesta said it. There was no doubt in her mind that her sister would actually make her train with her until she dropped.

"You didn't come to us either," she told Nesta weakly.

"It doesn't matter," Nesta simply said, and her lips tugged into a small smile. "We're changing that now."

"We are," Feyre agreed, and her arms tightened around Eira again. "No more shutting us out. We're sisters. We deal with things together."

Eira let out a shaky breath, and a couple of tears fell down her cheeks as both Feyre and Nesta drew their bodies closer, enveloping her in their arms.

For a long, long moment, the three of them just lay there, soaking in each other's presence and Eira felt herself feeling...safe. Safe and loved.

"There better not be any more secrets," Feyre whispered after they had just laid there for a while, and Eira huffed out a small, dry chuckle.

"I don't have any more secrets," she mumbled, and Nesta let out a low scoff.

"Liar," Nesta told her, but there was no heat behind her words.

"I don't," Eira protested and felt Feyre's hands tighten around her.

"Don't worry," Feyre whispered soothingly, "if you don't have any now, you'll probably have more later," she said with a small smirk, and Eira groaned.

"That's not reassuring," she muttered, making Feyre laugh.

"Ah, but I imagine you'll have some secrets with Azriel eventually," Nesta teased her.

Eira's mouth dropped open at that, and her eyes went wide as a blush started up her cheeks. "I-I- you-"

Feyre snickered but was immediately interrupted by Nesta, who continued to speak, her tone as dry as a desert.

"Please, I don't need to a Seer to know that you two will be hiding quite a few things from us eventually," she said, and Eira suddenly wanted to bury her face against a pillow and die.

"Nesta," Eira protested weakly, but her sister just continued, and this time Feyre had clearly lost the fight against not laughing at her.

"Probably quite a few things at night," Nesta mused, and a strangled squeak came from Eira's mouth as Feyre cackled and her blush turned hotter.

"Can we...can we not...talk about this?" Eira protested, shoving her flushed face into a pillow. "Please?" she mumbled against it.

"Oh, come on," Feyre protested, "Don’t be such a prude about it! It's completely normal!"

Between a married couple! Not between…Not in a courtship!

Not…

"And I won't have my sister have anything but exceptional treatment from a male," Feyre said with a twinkling in her eyes.

“I-I-" Eiran tried to say something at that but found that her tongue had completely failed her. Exceptional treatment from a male...that was...what even meant that?

She hid her flaming face into the pillow again.

"Is he a good kisser?" Nesta asked, sounding curious. "Have you kissed?"

"I'm not answering that," Eira said firmly, her voice sounding very muffled as she kept her face pressed against the pillow. Feyre let out a soft snort.

"Oh, she's definitely kissed him," she said with a snicker as Eira made another protesting sound against the pillow.

"Has it been multiple times?" Nesta inquired, the words sending a jolt of something down Eira's spine, and Feyre let out another snicker.

"At least two," Feyre told her.

Eira made another strangled sound into the pillow because her sisters were not having this conversation. She was not having this conversation. This couldn't be happening.

“And have you done anything else?” Feyre asked her, her voice sounding amused, and Eira's head jerked up from the pillow almost comically fast.

"W-what?! N-no, of course not," she sputtered, her eyes wide and the blush on her cheeks very, very red.

"We aren't in the human lands," Feyre said with a shrug. "If two want more...well, then that's something that's between the two of you."

Maybe that was like it was in Prythian...but it wasn't ...it wasn't what Eira had...what Eira had...She had always been....she had always...Some things belonged in the marriage bed.

Some things were supposed to be between a wife and her husband.

"We-" Eira protested, sputtering for words again and trying to say something, anything, to distract them from the path this conversation was going, but found her brain entirely empty.

She had been taught...

"I...I-" she tried again, but her tongue would not make it past the lump forming in her throat. There were rules. There were rules for this.

"We aren't married," she whispered. They weren't married.

Those words went through her like thunder, making her swallow heavily. If they hadn't been married...well it meant that...it meant that everything that she had been taught growing up was...

That they were...they were allowed to...to do more than...

A shudder went through her at the implications of that realization, and Feyre's eyes were on her carefully, quietly studying her expression.

She had always been taught...she had been taught that everything that could be done with a man belonged in the marriage bed. That it was...impure to...to want to do such things.

"You don't have to do anything," Feyre told her quickly. "Azriel would never force you, you know that, right?"

"Yeah," Eira mumbled, and it came out more weakly than she would have liked. Because she did know that. She knew that, logically.

But a small part of her...a small part of her that had grown up being taught these things was...was terrified.

"What are you worried about?" Nesta asked her suddenly, and Eira's head jerked to her.

"W-what?" she stuttered again, and Nesta raised an eyebrow at her. "You clearly have something on your mind," she said evenly. "Something that has you terrified. What are you worried about?"

"I...I..." Eira mumbled, and her face burned red again. There was no way in hell she was telling them that. "It's nothing," she mumbled, but neither of her sisters looked convinced.

"Liar," Nesta said bluntly, and Eira flinched.

"That's not true, I'm-" she protested weakly, but her voice cut out when Nesta frowned at her. Oh, Gods "I'm...I'm just...worried that....I want...I don't-...What if he doesn't want me like that?" she suddenly stuttered and pressed her face again into the pillow.

There was a beat of stunned silence after she spoke, and suddenly Feyre snorted.

"Oh, you have no idea how much that male wants you," she said, a wicked grin on her lips.

"He would kill to have you," Nesta agreed, and Eira could practically hear the smirk in her voice "But only when you're ready, of course"

#acotar fanfiction #azriel x oc #azriel x reader #azriel fanfiction #azriel fanfic #Azriel x Archeron!Reader #the prophecy #Looked to the sky

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tadpolesonalgae · 3 months

Text

Silk Pyjamas[*]

Azriel x reader

a/n: I want to get a nice pair of silk pyjamas so badly but they’re so hot in the summer 😫

warnings: smut

word count: 1,232

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“Az…”

“Azriel…”

“Az…!”

You squirm under the hotness of his palms as they press their shape into your skin, squeezing at your hips, grazing your waist, cupping your breasts as he pulls your comparatively soft body flush to his front. Your hands press into the crook of his elbows, spine curving into him, head tilted to the side as his tongue licks over the smooth skin of your neck, nipping just shy of your ear, lost in the small noises you’re making, the short, hushed breaths exhaling from your inviting lips, the soft swell of your breasts against his chest as you curve beneath his touch.

“Az…come on, we have an early morning tomorrow…” you try, lips helplessly curving at their corners as he presses ticklish kisses into your skin, swiftly turning hot and feverish, wet and open-mouthed as he moves lower, forearm banding around the curve of your spine, his body arching over you as his hips press to yours.

You inhale sharply when his thumb slips beneath the blue silk band of your pyjamas, matching the pair you’d bought for him: a deep blue top with sleeves down to your wrists, his with slats carefully cut into the back panel, trousers for each of you that come to your ankles, cut in a way that Azriel has mentioned show your hind off. And now his hand slides from your hips to squeeze at the swell of your ass appreciatively, sucking small marks into your throat as he guides you back to the bed.

It’s then he pulls away, and any serious fight you had left in you liquefies at the softness and hunger of his hazel eyes—bedroom eyes, if you’ve ever seen them. “Do you want to stop?” He asks quietly, hands pausing their exploration to settle on your hips, his fingers just beneath the silk of your top, able to feel the soft heat of your naked waist beneath.

You make the mistake of glancing down to his mouth, your pupils dilating as heat softens your body in his arms, your hands slowly making the trail up over his arms, feeling the swell of muscle beneath your fingertips, tracing up over his biceps, up over his broad shoulders, settling at the nape of his neck. Fingertips threading through silky, dark hair.

“No…” you mumble, inclining your jaw, lips parting as he sighs with arousal, mouth slanting hotly against your own, tongue plying you further apart so he can get inside of you, soft, wet noises being exchanged between your mouths, the bed pressing into the backs of your thighs. Your teeth nip at his lower lip before pulling away in favour of crawling onto the bed, but his hands firmly grip your hips, lifting you up off the floor—a casual display of effortless strength that has heat melting between your thighs.

“Az…” you urge softly, settling on your hands and knees in the centre of your bed, feeling as he prowls up behind you, crowding your space as his long, deft fingers hook beneath the band of your blue, silk trousers, pulling the elasticated band down over the curve of your ass, stopping when you’re uncovered, the elastic squeezing at your mid-thighs, far enough down for him to be given an arousing view of between your legs.

“So pretty,” he murmurs, almost to himself, and you flush from the praise, lowering yourself into the duvet so as to keep his attention on your ass, stuck invitingly in the air. “So good,” he murmurs to himself, feeling how wet you are as his hand wraps around your upper thigh, thumb sliding with ease through your heat, prodding with interest at your entrance.

“Az, come on…stop teasing,” you moan sweetly, shifting your hips with impatience. “You started this…” A low chuckle rumbles from his chest, and you tighten around nothing, as if trying to suction his thumb further inside, but he pulls away, if only to lower the waistband of his own pyjamas to free himself.

“Alright, no teasing,” he replies, mirth clear in his deep voice, pressing closer to your soft body. Your teeth drag over your lower lip as he pushes his tip to your entrance, gliding through the wetness effortlessly, coating himself in your slick, before pushing in. You moan into the duvet, fingers crumpling the previously crisp and smooth sheets, toes curling as his hot palms pull back on your hips, guiding you together.

“You can…please…” you pant softly, spine curving from the pleasure, breasts pressing into the plush mattress, and you tilt your head into his shadows as they brush against your cheek, stroking your hair. “Please move…”

Azriel groans quietly, breathlessly, but acquiesces, gently pulling his hips back only to push in again, softly pushing you deeper into the mattress with each roll of his hips. Moans swiftly start spilling from your lips as he repeats the movements, pace increasing ever so slightly to become more regular, more languid movements that have your arms shaking from holding yourself up.

You feel so at home between his arms, with him filling you up so completely you can’t take it, arms giving out as you collapse down into the bed, allowing him to fuck you sideways. You cry out softly as he noses at your throat again, shadows pulling your hair out of his way so he can pull your scent deep into his lungs, infuse you with his body, increasing the pace to something more regular and familiar, his cock touching a spot inside you that has your toes curling, nipples peaking beneath the dark blue silk of your pyjamas.

As usual, his shadows don’t miss a thing, squeezing and palming at your breasts as they slip beneath your top, pinching and lightly flicking at your nipples, playing with them sweetly as he pushes more and more pleasure into you.

“Az…!” You cry out, the moan flying from your lips as a sign you’re on the edge, unable to help it—you want to call out his name when you cum; you like having it shaping your lips, how it feels in your mouth. “Az, Az…! I…I’m—!”

“Go on,” he urges softly, kissing up your throat, settling on a spot halfway down your neck, below your ear to focus on. “You deserve this…take it…fuck, there you go.”

Your breath catches as he rolls you over the edge, pleasure tingling in every part of your body as it bubbles and simmers beneath your skin, like being warmed by the summer’s sun. “Azriel…” you moan, fluttering around him as you reach your high, the pleasure practically doubling as you feel him breathe a sigh of relief, allowing himself to find his own release inside of you.

The high takes a while to fade, slowly drifting back down to this plane, panting deeply, warmed beneath the reassuring weight of his body, wings shuddering lightly where they’re splayed out over the bed. He pants softly against your neck, and you squirm from the ticklish sensation, wanting to shift to look at him.

The two of you smile, before mouths are opening again, pressing together and your fingers drag through his hair, gently stroking to keep him from pulling away before you’re okay with it.

There’s no need for that, though.

He doesn’t want to leave any more than you do.

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general taglist: @myheartfollower @tcris2020 @mali22 @slut4acotar @sfhsgrad-blog @needylilgal022 @hannzoaks @hnyclover @skyesayshi @nyotamalfoy @decomposing-writer @soph1644 @lilah-asteria @nighttimemoonlover

az taglist: @azrielshadows1nger @jurdanpotter @positivewitch @nightcourt-daydreaming @assassinsblade @marvelouslovely-barnes @v3lv3tf0x @kalulakunundrum @vellichor01 @throneofsmut @vickykazuya @starlitlakes

#azriel x reader #azriel x you #azriel x reader smut #azriel smut #azriel fics #azriel shadowsinger #azriel fics smut

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flickering-chandelier · 2 months

Text

Eyes Full of Stars

Pairing: Modern! Azriel x Reader

Summary: Reader and Azriel grew up together, and eventually fell in love. But he disappeared one day without a trace, and she doesn’t see him again until he’s in attendance at her wedding years later. They reconnect as friends, but when things fall apart with her husband, they both start to wonder if they should try to rekindle what they once had. But, of course, nothing can ever be that simple…

Based on this request! 🩷

Warnings: pregnancy, cheating (not from Az), swearing, a lil smut

Word Count: 7k

You could practically hear your heartbeat in your ears as you stood at the end of the aisle in your wedding dress, waiting for your cue to walk into the room crowded with everyone you knew, your future husband waiting for you at the end of the line. You took a deep breath as the music swelled, your bouquet shaking in your hands as you took a step forward, then another.

Relief flowed through you when your eyes locked on Tom’s, his smile bright as he drank in the sight of you in your dress for the first time.

Your gaze flicked back and forth, along all the faces of your friends and family watching you.

When your gaze met his though, shock ran through your entire body so swiftly that you nearly stopped dead in your tracks.

Azriel?

His eyes widened too, and it took every ounce of strength you had to keep walking, to keep breathing. You felt frozen, completely unable to tear your eyes from his until you were moving past him.

Your head was spinning. What was Azriel doing at your wedding?

When you made it down the aisle, your hands were still shaking as Tom held them. He subtly raised his eyebrow as the officiant started talking. You took a deep breath, forcing yourself to focus on Tom, on your husband, and not the man who had abandoned you without a word five years ago.

The ceremony was beautiful, exactly as you pictured it, and you did your best to focus on it.

By the time the reception rolled around, you had managed to put Azriel out of your mind for the most part.

That is, until you ran right into him on your way to the bathroom. His eyes widened, sucking in a deep breath as his gaze raked over you in your dress. “Hi,” he said softly, his hands tucked in his pockets.

“Hi?” You spat, doing your best to keep your voice low. “Hi? You disappear without a trace after everything and then you show up at my wedding and all you can say is hi?”

His mouth opened, and you could still read him well enough to know that he was frantically trying to form a response.

“What are you doing here?” You asked.

“I…” he trailed off and swallowed, his jaw flexing once. “I didn’t know this was your wedding. Tom is my co-CEO.”

“He…” your mind whirled, putting puzzle pieces together. “He told me your name, but I didn’t think…”

“No, I guess you wouldn’t assume that it was me,” he offered you a sad smile.

The two of you were silent for a moment as you both drank in the sight of the other. He looked good. In those hazel eyes, you could still see the boy who lived next door, and the man you fell in love with. The one you didn't think you would ever see again.

“You look beautiful,” he said softly, his eyes swimming with emotion.

“Thank you,” you murmured, unable to look away from him. “I can’t believe it’s really you.”

The side of his mouth turned up into a small half smile. “Imagine how I felt when I saw you walk down the aisle.”

A small laugh burst out of you before you could stop it. “A little shocking?”

“Just a bit,” he smiled, but his eyes looked sad, and it all came rushing back to you, that summer when he left, and the fall when he disappeared. The hurt, the panic, the confusion.

“I should go,” you blurted, taking a step back from him. His slightly guilty expression was enough to tell you that he understood where your mind had gone.

“Of course,” he said quietly. “Enjoy your night.”

You darted away without risking another word.

---

The diner was busy as you and Azriel walked in, but your table was free and Emily the owner smiled at the two of you, nodding to your table.

You both ordered the usual, and then settled in, an air of anxiety clouding both of your demeanors.

“What if we don’t get in?” You asked, the envelope trembling in your hands. “Or worse, what if only one of us gets in?”

Azriel smiled warmly, putting his hand over yours to stop it from shaking. “We’ll figure it out, like we always do. It’s been you and me since the second grade, and nothing is going to change that, okay?”

You nodded, the tension leaving your body as you looked at your best friend. No matter what happened, you knew you could count on him, ever since he saved you from your bully in elementary school. You’d been inseparable for ten years now. You couldn’t imagine your life without him, and it terrified you to think that the two of you could be separating after graduation, even if he insisted that it wouldn’t happen.

His thumb traced the opening of his own envelope.

“Wait,” you blurted, and he smiled knowingly at you. “Can we just… wait a minute?”

Azriel pointedly placed his envelope on the table in front of him, and you did the same.

“I haven’t seen you this nervous since your Geometry exam,” Azriel teased, his eyes twinkling.

You groaned. “Geometry was really hard for me.”

He laughed. “I know it was.”

Azriel’s expression sobered a bit then, as he leaned forward and looked at you intently. “What are you really so worried about?”

“I just want to get into the right college--”

“No,” he said, cutting you off, shaking his head slightly. “I know you. It’s something more than that. What’s going on?” he said softly.

You took a deep breath, feeling like you could drown in those eyes of his. “I can’t lose you,” you said quietly, your voice breaking slightly.

His eyes softened, his hand reaching for yours. “What are you talking about? You’re never going to lose me.”

Your gaze drifted to the envelopes. “What if--”

“No,” he said again. “Look at me.”

He waited until you slowly lifted your eyes to meet his. “You’re not losing me. Not ever.”

“You promise?”

“I promise.”

“Okay,” you said, taking a deep breath, steeling yourself to face the future.

“Come here,” he said, nodding to his side of the booth.

You looked at him questioningly.

“Come on,” he laughed. “We should do this together.”

He wrapped his arm around your shoulders as you settled in next to him, pulling your body against his side.

Azriel handed your envelope to you before taking his own. “Ready?”

“Ready.”

You held your breath as you both opened your envelopes, Azriel’s hand on your shoulder reassuring you that it would be okay, whatever the results were.

He looked at you, hiding his letter against his chest, raising an eyebrow at you.

“I got in,” you said, flipping yours around so he could see it.

Azriel grinned, flipping his letter around for you to see. “Me too.”

And your heart absolutely soared.

---

Tom wrapped his arms around your waist days later, burying his face in your neck. “You okay? You’ve seemed off lately.”

“I’m okay…” You trailed off. You had been plagued by thoughts of Azriel since the wedding, remembering all kinds of little moments throughout your life. You had been debating how to tell Tom about his coworker.

“Are you sure?”

You turned around to face him, biting your lip anxiously. “You know Azriel?”

He furrowed his brow in confusion. “Yes?”

You took a deep breath. “You remember the guy I grew up with?”

“The one you dated and then he disappeared?”

You nodded.

“Yes?”

Silently, you watched him put the pieces together, his expression changing as comprehension dawns on him. “No.”

You winced, nodding. “Yes.”

“Azriel?” he asked.

“Yeah.”

“Oh my god.”

“I know.”

“You never found out what happened, right? Why he just left?” He asked, his eyes softening as he looked at you.

“No,” you said quietly.

“I can’t believe this. Are you okay?”

“I think so,” you said, looking up at him, wrapping your arms around his waist. “It’s just brought a lot back.”

He leaned down and kissed you gently. “Is there anything I can do?”

You shook your head, burying your face in his chest. “I just need to forget about it, I think.”

---

Azriel looked at you questioningly as you walked into his dorm room and slumped into his desk chair.

“Boys are stupid,” you grumbled.

It was hard to look Azriel in the eye in times like this. Lately, you’d been seeing Azriel in a different light. He had always been your best friend, but for the past few months you’ve had butterflies in your chest when he smiled at you or wrapped an arm around your shoulders.

And god, he was gorgeous. You’d seen girls crushing on him in school before, of course, and had rolled your eyes and had a laugh about it. But now… Now, you understood.

You’d gone on a few dates since coming to college, but you couldn’t get Azriel out of your mind long enough for them to actually go anywhere.

“I think you’ve just been going out with the wrong guys,” Azriel said quietly from where he sat on his bed.

“Clearly,” you said, forcing down the little bubble of hope that formed at the tone in his voice. “What kind of guy do you think I should try to find?”

Azriel leveled his eyes on yours, his face as stoic as you’d ever seen it. “Someone who knows you,” he murmured after a beat of silence. “Someone who understands you.”

Your breath caught in your throat as he held your gaze, trying to read between the lines of his words as he looked at you expectantly.

“Someone who…” your stomach flipped as you forced the next words out, “I’ve known for a long time?”

He nodded, a muscle in his jaw ticking. “Someone who… loves you.”

You were sure that you weren’t breathing at all now. “Someone like…?”

“Someone like me,” Azriel said gruffly.

Your feet were moving toward him without your permission, and in a moment you were on the bed in front of him and his hands were in your hair, his lips on yours.

“You love me?” you asked weakly against his lips.

Azriel laughed. “Of course I do.”

It was a moment before you could pull yourself back from him and search his eyes. “I had no idea.”

He cupped your cheek in his hand, gazing at you with stars in his eyes. “Then you haven’t been paying attention.”

You laughed and kissed your best friend again.

---

The elevator dinged and you fought the urge to frown when it was Azriel, not Tom that was waiting on the other side of it. You had been slightly worried about running into him when you’d decided to bring Tom lunch, but you figured that it was a big enough company that it would be unlikely. Clearly, you were wrong.

Azriel’s eyes dropped to the bag in your hands and winced slightly. “Tom’s out to lunch with a client.”

You sighed, toying with the bag’s straps in your hands. “I guess I should’ve checked before I showed up, huh?”

He shot you that half smile that was so familiar to you, it made your knees wobble. “I think it was a last minute thing.”

You nodded, feeling awkward around Azriel for the first time in your life.

After a moment, you took a step back, and Azriel reached out, grasping your arm so you wouldn’t run into the person that was quickly walking down the hallway who you hadn’t noticed.

It was only a moment of embarrassment that you felt, because all the thoughts were quieted in your mind as you saw Azriel’s hand.

Scars. Horrible, deep scars that must have been from burns. A quick glance at his other hand showed the same thing.

You sucked in a deep breath, unable to tear your eyes away. “Az,” you whispered.

He flinched, flexing his fingers slightly, still gently wrapped around your arm.

After a moment, you raised your eyes to meet his, and your heart constricted at how sad he looked. “I think it’s time I told you the truth.”

---

You buried your face in Azriel’s chest, holding on tight. “I can’t believe I’m not going to see you for weeks.”

There were a lot of things that you couldn’t believe. You couldn’t believe that college was over. You couldn’t believe that your life was really going to start, with Azriel by your side. You couldn’t believe that Az had been dropping so many hints about rings and weddings. And you couldn’t believe that after spending nearly every day together for the past four years, that Azriel would be going home without you for several weeks.

“If you hadn't gotten a job before you even graduated like a badass, you could have come with me,” he teased, kissing the top of your head.

You groaned, tightening your hold on his waist, resting your chin on his chest so you could look up at him. “I’m gonna miss you.”

He smiled, leaning down to kiss you sweetly. “I’ll miss you too, sweetheart. But it won’t be long.”

You nodded, feeling slightly reassured. “I love you.”

He kissed you again, murmuring, “I love you,” against your lips.

The weeks had come and gone, and you hadn’t heard anything from Azriel. At first, you figured that he was busy, that he was soaking up the time with his family, but now you weren’t so sure.

How could it be that you hadn’t heard anything at all? Was he okay? Surely you would have been informed if something happened, right?

As more weeks passed, you knew. You knew that Azriel was not coming back. That he had abandoned you without so much as a text. He didn’t love you anymore, or maybe he never did.

The one person that had been a constant in your life since you were seven years old, was just gone, disappeared completely.

You could go home, you supposed. You knew where he had gone, after all. Your own parents were right next door. But what would be the point, if he clearly didn’t want you anymore?

Things had been perfect for so long. It didn’t make any sense. What could have possibly happened to make him throw you away so harshly?

How could you ever move on from him? From the one you had loved so intensely for so very long?

---

You were so shocked that you silently followed him to a near empty cafe just down the block.

He cleared his throat after the two of you got settled, his hands clasped beneath the table. “You know that things were always… tense with my brothers.”

You nodded, feeling completely unable to form words, wondering what he could possibly be about to say.

There was a moment of silence before he spoke again, and he raised his hands, placing them on the table in front of him. “When I went home after graduation, my brothers did this,” he said, nodding to his hands.

Your heart dropped into your stomach, and you couldn’t stop yourself from reaching out and gently tracing a prominent scar with your fingertip. Your eyes started watering, and you did your best to blink the tears away. “How could they do this to you,” you whispered.

He shrugged, way too nonchalantly for the circumstances. “I don’t know. They were… experimenting.”

“Oh my god, Az,” you said quietly, quickly brushing the tears away before they could fall. “I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t be,” he said softly, tentatively running his thumb along your free hand. “I’m sorry I never told you.”

“Why didn’t you?” You asked, finally able to meet his eyes again. “Why did you just disappear?”

His eyes were swimming with emotion, guilt clouding his features. “At first I couldn’t face anyone. I just wanted to disappear completely.”

You didn’t try to hide the tears now, letting them fall freely as you focused on him, finally learning the truth.

“I was… messed up. It took me a long time to work through it and feel like myself again. And by then, I felt like it was too late to contact you and explain. I felt so guilty for just leaving without a word, and thought that you would hate me.”

You smiled sadly. “I did hate you a bit,” you admitted. “You were everything to me, Az.”

Azriel swallowed, his eyes softening. “I know. You were to me, too.”

Your mind was swirling, picturing Azriel all those years ago, hurt and alone. “I do wish you would have told me. But I do understand why. I can’t believe that happened to you.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you,” he said sadly. “I should have.”

It was then you both seemed to realize that your hands were still touching and he slowly pulled away, settling his hands beneath the table again. It had felt like old times until then, and suddenly you were brought back to the present, to the world where you were married and Azriel was barely an acquaintance.

You weren’t sure where to go from there.

---

It had been a rough day. You hadn’t done well on the test you had studied all night for, you spilled your coffee all over yourself, and you hadn’t had anything to eat all day.

The moment you walked into your apartment, you knew that Azriel could tell you hadn’t had a good day.

Azriel took the backpack from your shoulders, immediately wrapping you up in his arms and resting his chin on the top of your head. “Bad day?”

You just nodded, burying your face in his chest.

“What can I do?” he asked.

“Mmm…” you thought for a moment. “Food?”

He chuckled, kissing the top of your head. “Do you want me to make something, or do you want takeout?”

You shrugged, exhausted. “Whatever you want.”

Az suggested that you go take a shower, and assured you that he would take care of it.

By the time you walked back into the kitchen, you already felt better, dressed in your pajamas and endlessly thankful for Azriel.

He was putting your favorite comfort food on a plate as you sat at the table, warmth flooding through your chest as he placed the plate in front of you.

“Thank you so much, Az,” you sighed happily.

Azriel kissed the top of your head again, gently rubbing the tension out of your shoulders as you started eating.

A short time later, the two of you were cuddling in bed, the stress of the day completely falling away at his touch.

“I don’t know what I would do without you,” you murmured into his skin.

“You’ll never have to find out, sweetheart,” he said.

And you believed him.

---

You felt like your whole world had changed after you found out the truth of why Azriel had left. Your heart broke for him, for what he went through at the hands of his own family, and how alone he must have felt.

It kept running through your mind, all the years with Azriel, all the years without him when you were in the dark.

You tried to forget about it, tried to focus on your life now, on your life with your new husband, but it was honestly difficult. Azriel had been the most important part of your life for so long, and now that he was back in your life, even in the smallest increments, it had you thinking about the past all the time.

What made you get stuck in your thoughts even more was how off Tom seemed lately. You had never felt so distant from him, and you weren’t sure if it was because of Azriel plaguing your mind, something that was bothering Tom, or some combination of the two.

These thoughts were swirling around your mind as you ran your Saturday errands. You had asked Tom if he wanted to join you, but unsurprisingly, he had declined.

You were debating what to get in the cereal aisle when Azriel appeared beside you.

He smiled at you somewhat sheepishly. It had been weeks since that afternoon when he finally told you everything, and you hadn’t seen him since.

“How have you been?” you asked.

“The last few weeks, or the last few years?” he smiled, raising an eyebrow.

You laughed lightly, “I guess we’ve both missed a lot.”

It was hard to think about: everything about him that you had missed.

“We could… catch up? If you wanted?”

You couldn't help but hesitate. You wanted to. Of course you did. But you weren't sure if it was a good idea.

One look at his hopeful face though, and all other thoughts flew from your mind.

“Let's do it.”

The two of you finished your grocery shopping and got coffee down the street.

After only a few minutes, you both resorted back to your old selves, any awkwardness dissipating as you discussed the last few years.

You couldn't help the swell of pride you felt as he explained how he had worked his way up in the company, becoming the co-CEO, just like Tom did.

It was crazy, how he had come back into your life, and you wondered if it would be possible to go back to how you were when you were kids, if you could possibly have your best friend back.

But then you remembered college, those long nights together, when he had told you in so many different ways that you were his. How loved you felt, how perfect you thought your life would be with him.

He could sense the shift in you, you knew that he could.

“Are you okay?” He asked.

“Yeah,” you said quietly. “Just… thinking. Remembering.”

He nodded, seemingly understanding exactly the kind of things you were remembering.

“How did you and Tom meet?” He asked, his voice dropping slightly.

It was clear that he was just trying to change the subject, and honestly, you found it difficult to tell him the story of how Tom had slowly picked up the pieces of you that Azriel had left behind. You kept it somewhat vague, not necessarily wanting to subject him to too many details. You certainly knew that you wouldn't want to hear all the gory details of whoever he had been with in the last five years.

You secretly wondered if it was hard for Azriel to work with Tom, after everything that had happened. You and Tom hadn't talked about it since that night you told him that you knew Azriel.

Before you even realized it, it had been nearly two hours, and you realized that you should get home.

“This was fun,” you said, unable to wipe the smile off your face.

“It was,” Azriel smiled back and your heart beat a little faster. “Whenever you need a friend, I'm still here for you, you know.”

“You, too.”

A few days later, Tom had told you in the morning that he would be staying at work late, and suggested that you go out with some of your girl friends. You hadn’t seen them in a while, and you thought it would be nice to spend some time not worrying over your ex and your husband.

You had been out with them for a few hours, and had returned home exhausted, but glad that you took some time to get away from everything.

Tom’s car was in the driveway, and you were a bit surprised. He was back much earlier than he said he would be.

You heard Tom’s deep grumble as you walked in the door, but what you weren’t expecting was the feminine giggle that came after it. You froze, dead in your tracks.

Surely there could be a reasonable explanation that didn’t involve your husband sleeping with another woman, right?

Although… he had been acting differently lately. Was this the reason? Had he been having an affair?

Your stomach was churning as you walked up to your bedroom, where the sounds were getting louder.

That was it, then. Was there even a point in opening the door? Was it worth it to see something that you would never be able to unsee, something that would surely haunt your nightmares?

You would need proof, you supposed, to assure that you were right. To assure that he knew what you had found out.

Like ripping off a bandaid, you quickly flung open the door, and there he was, naked in your bed with a secretary from the office underneath him.

“How cliche,” you choked out, desperate to keep any last shred of dignity that you could.

They both turned quickly to look at you, their eyes wide in surprise, Tom’s mouth open as if he was about to come up with some excuse.

But, you didn’t want to hear it. You spun on your heels and ran out of that house, into the car, and away as fast as you could. In your rearview mirror, you saw him on the lawn in his boxers, watching you leave.

You went to the only place you could think of. The only place that you knew, despite everything, you would be okay.

Suddenly, you were thankful that Azriel told you what apartment building he was now living in during your little catch-up at the cafe only days ago.

It took some time to find the right apartment, but then he was opening the door in a black t-shirt and gray sweatpants and he was looking at you with the most concerned expression.

“I really need a friend right now,” you sniffed.

As soon as he ushered you inside, the dam broke and you were sobbing, your body spasming in a way that it hadn’t done since Azriel had disappeared from your life all those years ago.

He didn’t say anything, didn’t ask questions, he just held you, settling you both on the couch and stroking your hair, murmuring reassuring things against your ear until you could breathe again.

“He cheated on me,” you finally whispered, and his arms stiffened around you. “I think he has been for a while.”

“Fuck,” he said quietly, but with more venom than you had ever heard. “I can’t believe him. I’m so sorry,” he said, his tone becoming softer as he continued to stroke your hair, pressing a kiss to the top of your head like he had your whole life.

A swell of emotion went through you at the contact, and you buried your face in his chest, wondering what your life would be like now if Azriel had never gone home after graduation. If he had been yours this entire time.

The way it should’ve been.

“I never thought he was good enough for you,” Azriel murmured against your ear, sounding hesitant.

“No?” you asked.

“Of course not,” he lightly ran his hand down your arm and you shivered. “He’s so cocky.”

You laughed humorlessly, leaning into Azriel’s touch. “He is, isn’t he?”

The two of you sat back in companionable silence after that, Azriel gently running his hand along your arms, your back, soothing you in ways that you couldn't fathom. You should still be furious, you thought. But instead you just felt… safe. For the first time in a long time.

“You’ve been on my mind a lot lately, Az.”

He stiffened very slightly and waited a moment before responding. “You’ve been on my mind a lot, too.”

You turned around to face him, and you swore his eyes were sparkling in the dim light, the way they used to when he looked at you. “Do you ever think about…what could have happened? If things were different.”

A muscle ticked in his jaw. “All the time.”

Your blood rushed in your ears as you leaned forward and pressed your lips to his.

He pulled back, saying your name like a warning. “We shouldn’t.”

“Why shouldn’t we?” You asked. “You don’t want to?”

Azriel looked pained. “It’s not that I don’t want to. You’re vulnerable right now. Your emotions are all over the place, understandably. I won’t take advantage of you.”

“Az,” you said, looking him straight in the eye. “This is the first time in five years that things feel right. I promise you’re not taking advantage of me.”

He sighed as you lightly ran your fingertips along his bicep. “It’s a bad idea.”

You couldn’t resist kissing him softly one more time. “You’re saying you don’t want to?” you murmured, pulling away just slightly.

“I’m saying,” he paused and his eyes darkened as he looked at you, “it’s a bad idea.”

“Az,” you whispered.

And that was all it took for him to mutter “Fuck,” and take your face in his hands, kissing you fiercely, like he had been drowning and you were his only source of oxygen.

You balled your fist in his shirt, pulling him closer to you, your other hand buried in the hair at the back of his neck.

He groaned and the sound brought you right back to your past, to every night you used to spend together.

Heat rushed right through you, and all at once, you couldn't get enough of him.

“I never should’ve left,” he rasped against your lips. “I’ve regretted it every day since.”

“We’re here now,” you panted, rolling your hips against his, and he held you even tighter.

It wasn’t long before you needed more, pulling his shirt up over his head. He sucked in a breath as you ran your hands down his chest, your eyes fixed on his abs, the hard lines of his arms.

He toyed with the hem of your shirt, looking at you questioningly.

When you nodded, he pulled your shirt over your head painstakingly slowly, his eyes drinking in the sight of you like he’d been waiting his whole life for this.

You kissed him again, your hands trailing down to the waistband of his pants.

Azriel wrapped his hand around your wrist, stilling your movements. “Are you sure we should go further? It’s…”

“A bad idea,” you agreed, surging forward to kiss him again.

“A really bad idea,” he murmured, holding your face in his hands again, kissing you gently.

“I want you, Az,” you sighed against him.

He groaned, pulling you closer against him and picking you up, carrying you to his bedroom.

Lowering you onto the bed, he hovered over you, kissing down your neck, across your chest.

“God, I’ve missed you,” he groaned.

“I missed you,” you admitted, pulling his pants down to reveal that he wasn't wearing any boxers.

“Oh my god,” you moaned, and within a few moments you were completely bare underneath him, and he was lining himself up with your entrance.

“Are you sure?” He asked, his forehead resting against yours.

“I'm sure, Az,” you promised, and without another moment's hesitation, he pushed forward, slowly sliding into you.

Muscle memory seemed to overtake both of you, and you easily slid back into your old routine as he hit your sweet spot again and again while you raked your fingers down his back.

It didn't take long before you were on the edge, and you still knew him well enough to know that he was right there with you.

You held his face in your hands as you both came undone and he pressed gentle kisses along your cheekbones and your forehead as he caught his breath.

A little while later, you were laying together, tangled up in the sheets and you smiled, tracing the birthmark on his thigh.

You weren't sure where things would go from here, but you did know that in this moment, you were nothing but happy.

---

For the next few weeks, you tried to push forward and act like your life hadn't completely upended.

You got a divorce lawyer. You'd been staying at a friend's house. You had been seeing Azriel quite a bit, but you both decided it would be best to stay out of the bedroom until everything was settled with Tom, to avoid complicating things even further.

Still, you couldn't stop the butterflies that flew through your chest every time Azriel smiled at you. Tom had broken your heart, absolutely, but maybe it was giving you the chance to try things again with the one who got away.

Things seemed to be looking up, until you realized that your period was late. Really late.

Your hands were shaking as you turned the pregnancy test over and saw two little lines.

Suddenly, your world was upended all over again.

Azriel went pale the moment you told him. “You’re… staying with him?”

“What else can I do?” you asked, exasperated. “I’m pregnant, Az. This changes everything.”

“Does it? Does it change that he cheated on you, huh?” Azriel seethed.

You sighed. “You know it’s more complicated than that.”

“Is it?” he asked. “And how are you even sure the baby is his?”

“Of course it’s his,” you said, growing more and more frustrated. “It was only once, Az. It can’t be yours.”

“It can’t be? You sound like a high schooler.”

“Come on, be serious. The odds are miniscule,” you retaliated.

“No matter who’s baby it is, you can’t stay with someone who treats you like that.”

“What else am I supposed to do?”

“Leave him,” he roared. “Be with me.”

“Az,” you said quietly. “I can’t.”

“You can,” he said, cupping your face in his rough hands, running his thumb along your cheekbone.

You took a deep breath, trying to calm your mind, to focus, but it was impossible when he was holding you so gently and he was looking at you like that, his eyes pleading. “I … I need to think,” you stammered out.

His disappointment was obvious, but after a moment, he nodded, reluctantly taking a step back from you. “Okay,” he said gruffly. “Let me know if you need anything.”

---

Even though you were both broke, Azriel had taken you out to your favorite restaurant just because, and you were reminded for about the millionth time that you were so unbelievably in love with him.

With graduation looming and the future uncertain, you had found yourself spending as much time as possible with him. Not that you didn’t before, but now it felt heightened somehow, like you had to soak in every moment with him that you could get.

He held your hand in his across the table, toying with the ring on your middle finger, sliding it up and down over your finger, before sliding it off completely and moving it to your ring finger, running his thumb across it in its new spot.

You looked up at him and the corner of his mouth turned up into a slight smile. So, he had done it on purpose, then. Your stomach flipped.

“Looks good there,” he murmured.

Rolling your eyes goodnaturedly, you tried your absolute best not to read into it too much. “You’re an idiot,” you laughed.

He laughed, bringing your hand up to his mouth and brushing a kiss along your knuckles. “I’m serious,” he claimed, his smile brighter now. “The future is coming up soon, you know.”

His eyes were full of stars as you gazed at him. All you could say was, “It is.”

“When we were kids, did you ever think we would end up here? Together?” he asked suddenly.

You furrowed your brows, thinking for a moment. “I don’t know. I definitely couldn’t have dreamed this up, though.” You smiled at him. “How perfect things have been, I mean.”

His expression lit up even more and you felt the butterflies in your stomach that he had given you for years. “I think I always knew deep down that we were meant to be together,” he said quietly.

“Good thing it all worked out, then,” you beamed, glancing down again at the ring he had moved.

He followed your gaze, smiling. “Of course it did. What other option is there?”

---

Your head was spinning. You didn’t know what to do. Obviously, staying with Tom would be awful, after everything he had put you through. But, this pregnancy changed things. You couldn’t in good conscience keep him from his baby. And it had to be his baby, didn’t it? Nothing else made sense.

But Azriel. You hadn’t known that he felt that way. That he was so ready to jump into being with you again. Just a little while ago, you had thought that was what you wanted. But, was it still true, if you were going to be raising Tom’s baby?

It was all too much, too complicated.

You needed time alone.

After about a week without contact from Tom or Azriel, you had come to a somewhat tentative decision.

Azriel’s relief after you had told him you’re not staying with Tom was obvious, and that made it so much harder to tell him the next part: “But I’m not ready to start something with you right now,” you admitted. “I need time by myself, to move on from my failed, embarrassingly short marriage, and to figure out how to be a mom.”

He nodded, his eyes full of emotion. “I understand. I’m sorry if I put too much pressure on you.”

His soft tone made you want to weep. “You didn’t. Thank you for understanding.”

There seemed to be something else eating away at him. “What’s wrong?” you asked after a moment.

“Can we still be friends?” he asked hesitantly. “I can’t stand the thought of losing you completely again.”

You smiled for what felt like the first time in ages. “Of course we can be friends.”

And so, time passed, and it was Azriel who helped you move into your new apartment, who often drove you to doctor’s appointments, and was overall the one who was picking up the pieces of your shattered life.

He never mentioned anything romantic after that day, but you could tell when it was on his mind, and you couldn’t deny that it had been on your mind more and more as the months passed and you felt like you were healing from Tom.

But you were also more and more nervous about becoming a mother, and how in the world would you be able to juggle a new relationship when you became a mom?

It wouldn’t be an entirely new relationship, though, would it? With Azriel… in some ways it felt like no time had passed at all, you fell right back into step together. So, wouldn't a romantic relationship be the same way?

You could never be sure until you tried, and that scared you, too.

The months kept passing, and before you knew it, you were holding your baby boy in your arms, absolutely transfixed by him.

After all the excitement died down, you got to have a moment alone with him, running your hands over his tiny arms, his tiny legs.

Your fingers froze when you noticed a small birthmark on his thigh, exactly like the one Azriel had in the same spot.

Surely that meant that Azriel was right. He was the father. All this time, Azriel had been the father of your baby.

You were surprised by the intense relief you felt, the flood of emotion.

After you took a few more minutes for yourself, you invited Azriel in from where he had been patiently sitting in the waiting room for hours.

He looked relieved when he walked in, like he had been worried about you and the baby. His face softened immediately as he looked at the baby in your arms, gently running his finger along the baby’s arm. “He’s beautiful,” he murmured, before studying your face. “How are you feeling?”

“Good,” you smiled. “I need to show you something, Az.”

Azriel just looked at you questioningly before you turned the baby to face Azriel and pointed at the birthmark.

His brow furrowed. “That looks like mine.”

You nodded, biting your lip nervously. “I think I owe you an apology… Az, I think this is your son.”

Azriel’s eyes immediately filled with tears as he looked back and forth between you and the baby. “My son,” he whispered. “Our son.”

He let out a giddy laugh that made you want to cry and looked somewhat sheepishly at you. “Can I hold him?”

You held the baby out to him, and he gingerly took him in his arms, staring down at his face with all the love in the world.

“Are you happy?” you asked after a moment.

He looked at you incredulously, settling into the chair beside your hospital bed with your son in his arms. “Are you kidding? Of course I’m happy.”

In that moment, you knew you couldn’t wait any longer. “Azriel?” He tore his eyes away from the baby and looked at you. “Kiss me,” you whispered.

He was obviously surprised, but did as you asked, leaning in slowly and kissing you gently.

“I love you,” you whispered. “I want to be with you… if that’s still what you want.”

“Of course that’s what I want,” he laughed incredulously, leaning in to kiss you again.

He kissed you slowly until your head spun and he finally leaned back.

“I never stopped loving you,” he whispered, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. “Not for a second.”

Your heart broke a little. “I’m sorry I made you wait so long.”

“Don’t be,” he said gently. “You have nothing to apologize for.”

The two of you sat there, basking in the moment under the fluorescent lights. This, somehow, was everything you pictured your life would be, and now it was finally yours.

@loving-and-dreaming @birdsflyhome @hanuh @sheblogs @iambored24601 @thalia-as-blog @ecliphttlunar @melmo567 @headacheseason @sillysillygoose444 @halibshepherd @cigvrette-dvydrevms @lilah-asteria @evergreenlark @bookloverandalsocats @azrielshadows1nger @marina468 @yourqueenlilith @mariamay02 @andreperez11

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solbaby7 · 3 months

Text

Forbidden Fruit

pairing: cassian x rhysand’s sister!reader

warnings: sneaking around, suggestive language, swearing, possible sexual content either way minors DNI, mutual pining, a simping Cass and a meddling Az

summary: The General Commander of the Night Court finds himself falling for the High Lords precious little sister.

—

Cassian knew better.

He was smarter than this—had better self-control and discipline than hundreds of thousands of men combined but all of that crumbles to ash the second you come prancing past in those tight pants. The same ones that sat low on your hips paired with the skin tight sleeveless top that showed off the wink of your navel and the dangling piercing that resided there. “Your brother know about that?”

“Oh, Commander,” His jaw clenched at the title, the sing-song lilt of your voice and the bedroom eyes that raked down the giant length of his form. Never in his life had he ever felt so anxious under a woman’s gaze and he fights the urge to shift his weight from foot to foot. “You’d be positively baffled by the things my brother doesn’t know about.”

It was a taunt; perfectly manicured nails plucking at a string that was already seconds away from snapping. Even then, Cassian can’t seem to help himself and like a small animal with little sense of self-preservation—he’s caught in your trap. “Like what?” He clears his throat, the words coming out too soft, too desperate and yet he can’t find it in him to be embarrassed when you’re looking at him like that.

Dark lashes frame pretty eyes that trail down the length of his body, a feline smile on full lips. “I really wish I could say, General,” Never had his body reacted to his title in such a way; skin burning like a flame when it came from you, dark hair hanging over your shoulders and he wills his knees not to buckle when you stalk closer. A manicured finger just barely grazes the length of his bicep and he’s already fighting the growing erection beneath his breeches. “But, I just can’t be sure you’ll keep your mouth shut.”

“I won’t say anything.”

You raise a brow, head quirking to the side and you’re unabashedly aware of the fact that this wing of the house was utterly bare save for you and Cass. “I’m throwing a little party tomorrow,” His surprise is evident; as witty and seductive as you may be, it was common knowledge how responsible you were. The pressures of perfection always weighed heavier on a woman and you handled it well. “Come if you’d like but only you.”

“Where?”

There’s a mischievous glint in your eye, fingers toying with the hilt of the sword hung at his hip. “Can’t say—you’ll just have to find me.”

He’s stuck in place when you saunter off, hips swishing from side to side until you disappeared behind closed doors at the end of the hall. Cassian huffed out a shaky breath, a hand raking through slightly overgrown strands as he willed his heart to return to its normal rhythm but he was already a goner. Mind utterly consumed in all things you from the shimmering pin tucked in your hair or the shiny sheen glossing over pouty lips.

For twenty-four hours he’d obsessed over the smell of your soap until his focus was shifted to the breathy little grunts you offer when sparring in the ring the following morning. “You’re getting sloppy.”

“Because,” You huff, breathing labored, sweat dripping down your back and you’d long since tied your hair in a knot at the top of your head. “I’m tired and can’t stop thinking about food.” You get in a few good jabs but the exhaustion sets in much quicker for you than it did the Illyrian soldier.

The idea that sets into his mind is disgraceful; pupils dilating at the very thought and he nearly moans out loud when you bend over to grab your canteen. Stretchy shorts hug tight around the curve of your ass and Cass is already diving head first into filthy fantasies of you bent over just like that with his face shoved between your thighs. It feels so real his mouth actually waters, throat bobbing with a gulp and his hands clench into tight fists.

It's wrong.

He couldn't—shouldn't—be thinking such thoughts but it's like you're doing it on purpose. Body elongated and spine dipping when tugging off the sweat-soaked training top. Only left in a sports bra and the holsters that wrap along your wrist and forearm, holding two swords so sharp you could probably slice his head from his shoulders with the right amount of intent. Yet, for some reason it doesn't deter him; the lethality of you that was always kept contained like some secret weapon just waiting for their moment.

The shirt hits the floor with a wet shlop and before Cassian can form words, Azriel is brushing past him with a knowing glance. "We'll feed you after you fight me," Cassian hates the way his nose scrunches in jealousy, lip twitching to curve into a snarl at the easy banter that arises between the two of you. Azriel stalks you like prey, sharp eyes raking up the length of skin you have bared—even if he does do it significantly more subtle than Cass.

You offer a breathy laugh, throat moving over the large gulps of water before falling into stance. Its casual, body loose from the thorough warm-up and Cass feels his blood rush at the mischievous smirk growing in the corner of your mouth, eyes darting to the shadows beginning to circle you. "Shouldn't take too long," Confidence dripped off your tongue like hot honey. "If you play fair, that is."

Az slowly tilts his head to the side, acutely aware of the rage radiating off his brother from the edge of the ring. It doesn't deter him in the slightest, shoulders rolling and wings tucking in preparation as a breeze shifted through his hair. "What's the fun in that?"

It's annoyingly fluid and Cassian just can't quell the frustration; lips scowled in a sneer the closer you and Azriel got. It should've been him with his hands touching your skin; should be him making you grunt and snap out snarky remarks whenever you'd lost the upper hand. The General's jaw clenches, teeth gritting when Az slams you down on the mat, holding down your arms as you struggle beneath such weight. "That's fine," Azriel jokes, sun beating down on golden skin, shining across amber irises and the brilliance is nearly overwhelming—nearly. "I like 'em squirmy."

It happens so fast that even the shadows don't have time to react when a whip of endless darkness wraps around the spymasters neck and snatches him back. The element of surprise works in your favor, offering enough time to get back on your feet and gain some distance despite the fact that he recovers unnervingly quick, gaze darkening under the challenge. "What? I thought we were having fun, Azzy?" A innocent little pout completely contridicts the growing throb of power that hums off your frame. "Playing around."

The sharp sting of metal unsheathing and the blades attached to your forearms are unfastened, the hilt twisting with practiced ease as you adjusted your grip.

You play the clueless female well—too well.

Maybe that’s why Azriel underestimates the true extent of your focus; too trained on the rapid rising and falling of your chest, the way your left leg trembles slightly with exhaustion and he’s completely blindsided by the way you adjust your magic to him. The deep abyss of darkness that usually comes when calling your power shifts, the shade adapting to that of Azriel’s shadows until there was no way to tell where he started and you ended.

You take the opening, mentally patting yourself on the back for the look of genuine shock that smears its way across Azriel’s face and he’s on the ground in seconds. Your knees dig into the juncture of flesh in his biceps, applying pressure to vital nerves as you hover over his chest. “Alright, alright,” He taps at the mat twice, sweat lacing his brow and fingers going numb. “You win.”

With a deep exhale, you flop to the side and sprawl flat out on the mat, limbs boneless as your head lazily turns to face a brooding Cassian. “Feed me. The Heiress of your Court demands it.” Maybe it was the linger aftershocks of jealousy that leads Cass to saunter over and hoist you over his shoulder. It’s effortless and the surprised yelp that strangled free is slightly more embarrassing that being manhandled. “Cassian,” You grunt, bunching your hands in the durable material of his leathers to brace yourself. “Put me down, right now!”

His amusement rumbles against your belly, one large hand splayed high on the back of your thigh. “I’m only doing as my Heiress asks.”

A flush warms your cheeks, no longer able to blame it on the sun when the cool air of the house shifts over your skin. “Seriously, put me down. You stink.”

“You don’t smell much better but I was practicing self-control and keeping it an inside thought.”

Your hand smacks on his back in retaliation, huffy swears echoing throughout the halls but Cassian continues as if you hadn’t done anything at all. Instead, he plops you into a seat at the dining table and instantly the house predicts your needs, providing a spread of food that has your mouth watering and stomach growling.

Before you can even reach for a plate, Cassian’s already washed his hands and come back to pile a plate full of your favorites, swiftly avoiding foods you didn’t enjoy as much as if it were second nature. A brow quirks playfully, form sinking into your seat comfortably. “You gonna help me shower too?”

“Only if my Heiress demands it.” His lips shift into a smirk so sinful you shift in place, fingers just barely recovering from losing your grip on your silverware.

A scoff hides your inability to form words, fork scraping against the fine china as you fill your mouth with much needed sustenance. Immediately, your shitty mood dissipates, hips wiggling in complete bliss while you indulge in garlicy breadsticks dipped in creamy pasta sauce.

“You’ve been training your powers.” Cassian mentions more so to distract himself from the little moans you let you with each bite. “I’ve never seen you manipulate them like that. Blending into Az’s shadows?”

“A girls gotta do something to fill her time.”

Golden eyes narrow in your direction, scanning the curve of your cheeks and slope of your nose. He lingers entirely too long on your mouth, pasta sauce gathering in the corner and his fingers twitch to reach over and wipe it off. “What else are you hiding under your sleeve?”

“If I told you, I’d have to kill you.” Something about the way you look at him has Cassian’s skin going hot, the pale violet of your iris turning into nothing but a thin ring as your pupils eat up the free space. “And, I’d hate to have to get rid of my favorite boy.”

“I’m your favorite?”

You’re outright teasing; taunting the brick wall of a man with nothing more than polished silver and the insinuating drag of your tongue against your fork. “You think I give invitations to secret parties to any ol’ body? Please, I have better taste than that.”

It’s instinctual. Driven by nothing more than pure Illyrian pride, his chest subconsciously puffing up with pride under the kiss of your compliment. He’s not brave enough to elaborate on it—too afraid to jumble his words and make a godsdamned fool of himself. “Where is this party anyway?”

Silverware clangs against fine china, a signal that you’ve finished your meal and the house is quick when cleaning up for you, fondly topping up your wine and providing fresh linen to dab around your mouth.

You don’t take it.

Instead, you offer up a crimson red ribbon just barely long enough to fully wrap around Cassian’s wrist. It’s smooth like silk in his grasp, the material coated in your scent and it takes every scrap of decency he has left not to shove it up against his nose. “Follow those. Once you’ve collected the last one, you’ll find me.”

“And then what?”

A sultry smirk curves at your mouth as you rise from your chair. “Then, you can have me.” His mouth goes dry, fists closing over the strip of fabric clutched between his fingers. “Have fun hunting, General.”

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