#cassian of illyria

[readychilledwine]

Mine

Summary - Cassian always gets a little riled up when he gets to fight for your honor.

Warnings - Blood, smut, focus on reader and Cassian's differences physically, reader is thick because it felt right, oral (female receiving), Cassian going to pound town.

A/N - based on this post and our comments from @loneliestluvr I refuse to apologize for how quickly this became smut.

Being mated to the Lord of Bloodshed was never easy, especially as an illyrian female blessed to have found him before your wings were taken. “Sorry,” you whispered as he flinched. You had got to the cut on his eyebrow, wiping it down as gently as you could.

Cassian was covered in blood. A mix of his own and another male's who had not known you were claimed by the male sitting in front of you. “You okay?” He had his eyes shut as you took care of him, content under the feel of your soft hands.

“You're the one who ended up in a fight with 6 other males and walked away. I should be asking you that.” You gently reset and healed his nose, silently thanking the Mother for such a useful gift.

Everything about you two had been so perfectly planned. The skilled warrior. Loud, personable, quick on his feet. Then you, the talented healer. Intelligent, shy, soft spoken. You were balanced perfectly. A match truly made by the Gods. You continued wiping the blood from him, ensuring he would not have to change the water multiple times once you got him bathed and stepped away before offering him your hand.

It was another contrast between you two and Cassian's absolute favorite. Your soft manicured hands, his rough and calloused ones. He laced your fingers together, pretending to allow you to pull him up at he stood. “I'm fine, baby. You should see the other guys.” He smiled at his own joke, walking into the bathroom of the cabin. “Are you going to undress me too?”

“Absolutely.” You were graceful with buckle, each tie, gently pulling armor and fabric from his body until it sat on the vanity nearby. Habit took over as you folded it all, putting the clothing into baskets to be cleaned before turning back to the god in fae form behind you.

The moan Cassian released as he sunk into the warm water had your thighs clenching. You watched his head fall back as lavender scented steam came from the tub and as his shoulders fell in relaxation. “Can I wash your hair?” He groaned again at the thought, smiling as you sat behind him with the soap. “Need to show you my love and appreciation for protecting me.”

He gave a breathy laugh, shutting his eyes in bliss as you began massaging shampoo into his wavy locks. “I will always protect you, y/n. Always. You are mine.”

“I am,” he growled at your agreement, his need to possess you was high. Illyrians had always been more feral with their bonds, and you absolutely allowed him to enjoy the primal tendencies that came with it. “I will always be yours. In this life and the next.” You began rinsing his hair, ensuring every spec of blood and dirt was out before applying a deep conditioner.

“Lean forward so I can wash your back, Cassian.”

“I don't deserve you,” he was drifting off under your touch, enjoying the feeling of you kneading sore muscles as you lathered his scarred skin with a soft scented soap. “Could you get my wings?”

You leaned in, whispering in his ear. “I planned on getting them once I got you fully cleaned and the water changed.”

“Fuck that,” Cassian forced you over, pulling you in thin night gown and all before ripping it off of you. His lips were on yours and hungry. He was grabbing your hips, loving their plushy feel. “Want you now.”

“Cass, this water is disgusting.”

His head hit the tub with a thud. “Fine. Fine. It's fine.” He was, in fact, not fine. You could feel how hard he was. His length was pressing into your stomach. “I just need you. You know how I get when you take care of me.”

You were washing him again. Cleaning off his chest and face, scrubbing his arms. He was memorized by you by your body. He remembered learning about the Gods of old from Rhysand's mother, and you had to have been crafted by the goddess of love. It was another contrast. His rock-hard body, toned and cut from years of training. Your soft body, curves landing in all the right places, thighs so thick you genuinely worried when you sat on his face.

He lifted you with little effort when he knew he was clean, climbing out of the water with his lips attached to the point on your neck that drove you wild. “Done waiting,” he carried you to the bedroom, sucking that spot until he knew a deep purple mark would form.

He threw you down on the bed, not caring that it would soak the sheets and mattress as he watched your full breasts bounce. When he was like this, you knew you were in for a ride. Knew that headboard wouldn't be enough to keep you in place as he pounded into you over and over again, only content when he had ensured you were filled and would smell like him and sex for weeks. He was studying you like you were his prey, waiting to pounce at just the right time.

He found it as you shifted, laying down more on the pillows like the queen he knew you were. He did not bother kissing your lips again. Instead, it was him instantly pulling your legs over his shoulders and licking your already soaked core. Your hands shot to his hair, moans ripping through your throat. He was eager tonight. So damn eager.

“Cassian,” he hummed against you, looking up through hooded lust filled eyes. “Slow down.”

He shook his head, not even letting your clit out of his mouth as he did. “Baby, I'm going to cum if you don't go slower.” His brows shot up and a smirk formed. It spoke of every intention he had, you would not leave this bed, not without him carrying you.

Every flick of his tongue, every long drag, the soft kisses all had you melting further Into the mattress as your nerves came to life. Cassian was as calculated in bed as he was on a battlefield. Everything was precise, done with intention, and meant to fulfill his goal. His forearm went against your hips, locking you in place at his mercy.

He could feel every wave of pleasure from you shooting down that sacred and special bond. He could sense the moment you fell. Your fingers tightened on the sheets, your back arched, it was silence before the scream. Between your own pleasure, you could feel his pride leaking down the bond. Pride with how easily he could pull you apart with nothing more than his tongue. Pride over the way your body was so easily his.

He only pulled away when you began to whimper and push, but he was instantly crashing his lips on yours as he kicked off his pants. His forehead went to yours once you were both breathless. Those Hazel eyes you melted in the gaze of were feral and dark with desire. In one smooth motion with no warning, Cassian was inside of you with one single word, “Mine.”

There was no split second of calm before the storm, no moment to catch your breath after he took it from you. Cassian began to pound into you, hitting that perfect spot and making you see stars. Your nails dug into his chest, leaving small marks to join the littering scars and cuts from his earlier fight. “Mine,” the growl was deep, an ancient part of him almost begging for affirmation of the word.

“Yours,” you moaned out for him, back arching as your stomach tightened. “All yours.” Cassian's arm went across your back, hand roughly gripping your hips he could force you to move exactly how he wanted.

You could hardly breathe, mind lost to anything but Cassian. Your mate. Your everything. You could feel him down the bond, feel him getting closer with each squeeze and twitch of your walls. The room was thick with the scent of sex and sweat, the sound of his groans and you whispering and moaning his name like a prayer to some long forgotten God. “So fucking beautiful,” his free hand forced your head up, forcing you to watch as his cock slid in and out of your core, soaked in your essence. “Watch me fuck you. Watch me mark this pretty perfect pussy as mine.”

You couldn't help but to moan, feeling that edge approaching faster and faster with his. “Cassie.”

“Do it. Cum on my cock, baby.” He let you go limp below him, placing your head back on the pillows gently as he did. Wave after wave of need and pleasure washed over you, blinding your senses to anything but the feel of Cassian filling you as you Came around him. He fucked you through the high before finally finishing, not even bothering to pull out and opting to instead hold your hips so close to his you could not even tell where he began and you ended.

When he finally let you go, he barely caught himself before collapsing on top of you as his exhaustion hit him. You could help but place soft kissed along his face. His scarred brow and lip, his nose that you'd reset and healed so many times, his jaw. You finally sighed with one last lingering kiss directly on his full lips as he smiled. “That was faster than I hoped it would be.”

“Always is when you fuck me after fighting.”

“Always yours.”

He kissed your neck softly on the mark he made, whispering one last time. “Mine.”

General Taglist:

@hnyclover @glitterypirateduck @slytherinindisguise @mischiefmanagers @bloodicka @starsinyourseyes @the-sweet-psycho @mariahoedt @rinalouu @sarawritestories @starryhiraeth @starswholistenanddreamsanswered @cumuluscranium @loneliestluvr @eternallyelvish @azrielsmate3 @daughterofthemoons-stuff @meritxellao @aria-chikage @hungryforbatboys @lilah-asteria @fandomrejects

[cassianappreciationweek]

Cassian Appreciation Week 2023 is here!

Welcome to Cassian Appreciation Week 2023, everyone! Here are a few reminders so the week can run smoothly.

Remember to tag @cassianappreciationweek and use #cassianappreciationweek2023 so we can see your posts!

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If you’re posting on Instagram, please tag our account @/cassianweek2023! Feel free to tag us as a collaborator so we can repost easily, or tag us in the caption so we can see all the amazing fanart ❤️‍🔥

Remain respectful at all times. Any and all works celebrating Cassian are welcome, and we want to make sure everyone feels included. We reserve the right to not promote works if authors don't follow this rule.

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We will not promote whitewashed art.

Have fun and enjoy celebrating our favorite bat boy!

Announcement post here!

[andreafausin]

Let’s pray for Azriel 🙏🏻🤣

(ACOSF in a nutshell indeed 🤭)

[really-fanny-longbottom]

only in my dreams

azriel x reader | love has two sides. it can be pure, beautiful, and exciting, but it can also be lonely, painful, and the worst of all—unrequited. warnings: mentions of heartbreak, unrequited love, alcohol, death and a curse word. words: 3.3k

series masterlist | general masterlist

you should have stayed at home.

you knew you shouldn't have come.  

you knew it was a bad idea from the moment you walked through the threshold of the balcony of the house of wind.

it was sad to know that this house used to be your safe haven — a place where you were happy and felt safe, where you could be yourself. 

but now it makes you want to leave as quickly as possible and never come back.

because that was the only solution to not having to see the scene that was unfolding in front of your eyes. 

your eyes — the same ones that used to contain love and happiness, were now sad and empty.

the same ones who used to shine with excitement every time you entered a room looked now absent — as if something had sucked away their vitality and left nothing behind.

even your kind and warm smiles had started to appear less frequently until they disappeared completely.

that's how you looked now — no sparkles in your eyes and no smile on your face as you moved the food on your plate with a fork from side to side.

you stopped listening to the conversation a long time ago. 

it was another dinner night with the inner circle at the house of wind. you were sitting between rhys, who was at the head of the table on your right side, and nesta on your left side.

you were trying everything to keep your eyes on your plate so you didn't have to watch elain being courted by azriel — the owner of your heart and the reason it was breaking little more day by day.

he wasn't to blame and you didn't blame him for his feelings towards the middle archeron sister, afterall, no one has the power to choose who they like or love — but it didn't make it any less painful.

pain — you were feeling it a lot now.  

every time elain laughed at something azriel whispered to her made it hurt even more.  

your power wasn't helping you at all right now.  

Being an empath had its advantages — it allowed you to feel and understand the emotions and feelings of others and increase and decrease their intensity. it also allowed you to know when someone is lying or telling the truth and to control and manipulate them, despite not using the last two (unless it was necessary) because you believe it to be incorrect.

but the thing most people didn't know about being an empath is that it affects your emotions and feelings, too.

it makes you feel everything more intensely — meaning that you felt everything ten times more than everyone else.

a good joke that made others laugh until their stomachs hurt — made you cry with laughter. 

simple things that made others happy — made you jump with joy.

and when others felt passion — you felt love. 

you loved with more strength and intensity than everyone, but you also suffered in the same way.

and when you suffer, it's like your light has been turned off.

a hand on your knee took you out of your thoughts — nesta.  

she was the only reason you were here — literally, she dragged you from the library when you told her you wouldn't be joining them for dinner.

the older archeron sister had become one of your favorite people. 

nesta was the one who had the most difficult time in adjusting and accepting this new life, so instead of ignoring her as some did, you decided to be the first to extend your hand to her.

it all started with your mutual interest in books. it started with book recommendations, then exchanges and finally reading them together.

by the time you noticed, you were training together, sharing meals, and adventuring in the city.

your friendship was not easy — nesta made sure of that.  

at first, she tried to push you away with cold stares and nasty comments, but you knew better than anyone that it was nothing but a defense mechanism.

you knew that when she said she was better off alone, she really just wanted someone to hug her.

so, knowing better than anyone, you fought for her.  

you ignored the cold stares and faced her nasty comments, and when she tried to push you away, you stood your ground and didn't let her.  

little by little, she let you in, and you got to know her — the real nesta.  

over time, the staring stopped, the comments disappeared, and instead of trying to push you away, she started looking for your company.

your friendship turned into a sisterhood, and now, Nesta would fight for you just as much as you fought for her. 

your sisterhood grew, and short after that, you were welcoming emerie and gwyn — your girls.

quickly, a friendship was formed between the four of you, and there was no one you trusted more than each other.  

they told everything about themselves, their past, their fears, and even their secrets.

so, you did the same — except your feelings for the shadowsinger, nesta was the only one who knew about that.

you joined the inner circle one hundred and fifty years ago when you moved to velaris to live with your great-aunt madja.

despite being an empath, you also inherited a natural talent for healing just like your aunt.

that's how you met rhysand and his family.

there was an enemy attack in windhaven with several fatalities and many injured illyrians, which required all the healers who worked at the clinic, including you and madja, to be winnowed there by morrigan.

as soon as you arrived, it was total chaos. the soldiers who were not injured, and even some who were, did not stop running from one side to the other, nor did they stop shouting or grabbing weapons and demanding to go after those who fled making it impossible for the healers to help. 

the enemy had already been defeated before your arrival, so you were not in danger and for that reason, you did not hesitate to use your powers.

you made your way so you could stand right in the middle of the soldiers. 

you raised your arms to the sides and closed your eyes, and with a little bit of focus you let the soldiers' emotions start to invade you from head to toe.

then with a long sigh, you took control of their emotions and released your power.

the soldiers immediately stopped in their places and went limp before starting to fall to the ground unconscious.

you put them to sleep.

it was the only safe way for the healers to be able to do their work even though you didn't like having this kind of control over someone.

the only ones who were not affected were the high lord, his brothers, and his cousin.

their eyes were fixed on you, who remained standing among the sleeping soldiers.

and when they turned to you for an explanation of what had just happened, they were even more shocked when you revealed to them what you were and what you had just done.

they had never met anyone with that kind of power, and so they were having a little trouble getting their faces back to an expression of neutrality.

impressed wasn't enough to describe how they were feeling at that very moment.

qs a thanks, rhysand offered you a position in his inner circle. after some hesitation and several lectures from madja about how it would be a bad idea (and lack of education) to refuse such an offer, you accepted.

moving to the house of wind, you established friendships with all the members, but azriel was the one you became closest to.  

you became best friends over time, and before you could stop your heart, you fell in love with him.  

even when he was already in love with mor.

despite knowing about his affections towards the blonde female, it hadn't hurt as much as it does now because azriel had never acted on his feelings for her.

but you decided to wait. you believed that one day the mother would smile upon you, and she would grant you the wish you carried in your heart every day.

therefore, during that time, you were content to love him from afar — and in the shadows.

you thought that day had finally arrived after noticing the change in azriel's behavior towards mor after the arrival of the archeron sisters.  

you couldn't be more wrong.

you couldn't help but find this whole situation ironic. after decades of seeing azriel in love with mor and hoping that one day he would notice you, he was now courting elain.

the archeron sisters came into your life and turned everything upside down. you were grateful that feyre and nesta's path led them to you, but you couldn't feel the same way about elain.

before you could wander in your thoughts even more, nesta squeezed your knee, getting your attention again. 

you looked at your best friend and noticed the worry on her face, so putting your hand on top of hers, you murmured to her a small "i'm okay" and gave her a small smile. 

"are you sure?" she murmured too, so no else could hear it. 

you nodded your head at her and returned your attention to your plate.

rhys' voice made you look up, and you regretted it immediately because in that exact moment, you saw azriel and elain's hands intertwined on the top of the table.

you shook your head and looked at your high lord — who had become a very good friend of yours.

"are our plans at rita's still on for tomorrow night?" rhys asked. 

everyone — but you — said their agreements before azriel spoke, "actually, elain and i have plans for tomorrow night." 

your breathing got caught on your throat, and nesta's hand flew immediately to yours, grabbing it gently.

it was Feyre who asked, "where are you going?" you could've sworn there was a hint of surprise in her voice.

"to the new restaurant that just opened by the rainbow. it's supposed to be very good," elain's eyes moved from her younger sister to the male sitting next to her, "so we decided to try it." 

cassian cleared his throat, and he looked in your direction before looking at the people in front of him. "it's that a date? are you going on a date?"

azriel chuckled and squeezed elain's hand. "i guess we can call it that." 

you stood up abruptly, attracting everyone's eyes, "sorry. i just remembered that madja needs my assistance to visit a patient tomorrow, and i forgot to prepare the medical bag." 

you excused yourself before leaving the dining room and making your way towards the stairs. 

you heard cassian and nesta calling your name, but you didn't bother to turn as you started to descend the ten thousand steps.

through your power, you were able to realize that no one — with the exception of your best friend and her mate — noticed your lie. 

Just as they didn't notice the tears that filled your eyes as soon as you turned your back on them and left the room.

••• 

you went to your aunt's house.  

the last thing madja expected to find at her door at that time of night was her niece with red eyes and tears running freely down her cheeks.

she barely let you walk in before she wrapped your figure into a tight embrace. 

she had noticed the change in your mood recently but decided not to comment because she knew very well that as soon as you were ready to talk, you would tell her everything.

and that's what you did.

you told her everything as you both rested on her pink couch with your head in her lap while she caressed your hair, listening to your words attentively.

you ended up falling asleep with your cheeks stained from the tears, and madja didn't dare to move. she refused to awake you from your peaceful slumber.

she bent down to kiss your head, and when she raised again, she saw a piece of parchment on the top of the table next to the couch, reaching for it.

it was rhysand asking where you were. 

madja answered for you, saying that you were with her and spending the night at her house. 

it didn't take long until your aunt joined you into your slumber.

•••

the following night, you made your way towards the House after a hard day at the clinic. 

the day got worse when the patient you went to see at his residence didn't make it.

sometimes, you hate your job, especially because of your powers. when things got too much for you to handle, you had to put a shield around you to prevent you from feeling your patients worries or pains.

the patient you visited was heavily sick. it was too late to do anything medical, so you did the only thing you could.

you used your powers. let his emotions invade you, and then, with a long sigh, you took away his pain and transferred it to you.

that was the only thing you could do for him at that moment, and you are more than relieved that you were able to provide him comfort while he left this world, making his passing easier for him and his family.

you climbed the ten thousand steps, but it didn't even bother you. you were too busy thinking about your patient and whether his family would be okay.

you made a mental note to visit them the next day and help where you could.

you pushed these thoughts away as you opened the door and entered the House.

all you needed right now was to be with your friends and forget about this awful day.

when you walked into the living room, you remembered that everyone went to rita's.

well, everyone, but you, azriel, and elain. the two of them were on their date tonight. 

and like a snap of a finger, all your emotions and feelings from the last few months and days came flooding back.  

your eyes fell on rhys's expensive drinks cart.  

you wiped your tears and everything you felt turned into anger.  

"fuck it."

you went to the cart, grabbed the first bottle that was in your reach, removed the cork and drank, sinking the drink down your throat and your sorrows with it.

•••

three hours later, cassian, nesta, rhys and feyre finally arrived at the house.

amren had departed to her apartment after they left rita's and mor stayed behind saying that her night wasn't over yet.

the two couples had come talking about you on the way. they had waited for you but when you didn't show up, they assumed you were with madja or still at the clinic.

rhys had sent a letter to madja a few minutes ago asking for you and when your aunt said she was looking for you too, they left hoping to find you here.

they just didn't expect the state they were going to find you.

as soon as they passed the threshold of the balcony and into the living room, they saw you.

you were laying on the couch with your legs off of it, an empty bottle was in your hand, and another on the floor by your feet.

"oh my god," the high lady whispered.

cassian moved and kneeled next to you by the couch. his hand made its way to your arm and tried to awake you.

"y/n." he shook you lightly.

after a few seconds, you opened your eyes and were faced with the General looking at you.

"cass," you said with your voice dragging, "you're here." you moved to sit and wrapped him into a hug, one that he didn't hesitate to reciprocate.

"are you alright, sweetheart?" he asked you while caressing your back.

"i am now that you're all here," you released a breath. "my dear friends", you looked at your other three friends who were looking at you with concern. "you're so beautiful. all of you. did you know that?" you giggled.

it was rare for you to drink and when you did, you never got drunk.

nesta sat down next to you and put an arm around your shoulders. you took the opportunity to rest your head on her shoulder, finding comfort in your friend's embrace.

"what happened, y/n?" she asked you.

you started laughing before replying with irony in your voice "what didn't happen?" 

you pushed away from her and stood so you could face all your friends "my patient died. the male I've been in love with for decades won't even look at me and this house that used to be my safe haven, it's now the stage of my pain."

"oh! not to mention that elain is mated but does she care? no! does azriel care? of course not. i've been in love with him for decades. decades! and he doesn't even look at me." you started laughing, "by the cauldron, u'm pathetic."

your family didn't seem surprised by your revelation.

cassian pulled you into a tight hug and rhys and nesta moved to do the same.

if it weren't for this situation everyone would've thought that the world was about to end from seeing rhys and nesta hugging each other.

morrigan arrived in the moment you were in the middle of your friends with tears in your eyes.

"what's going on?" mor whispered to feyre who was still in the same spot since she arrived.

feyre explained everything and by the moment she finished, both females had tears in her eyes at the sight of her friend being hurt.

"what's wrong with me?" you asked them, your voice breaking.

"nothing is wrong with you. nothing." that wasn't your friend speaking — it was your high lord.

feyre and morrigan joined the hug in the moment you said, "i'm never going to be good enough for him. i'll never be her." 

tears rolled down feyre and mor faces, and both females were asking the same question in their minds "how long has she been feeling like this?"

your high lady spoke this time, "y/n, what can we do? what do you need?"

you hugged cassian tighter before locking eyes with nesta "i just need my girls."

nesta nodded her head at you and looked at the blonde female "can you take us?" 

mor didn't hesitate in agreeing. 

anything to make you feel better.

•••

two hours later, you were in the middle of the bed with nesta and gwyn on one side and emerie on the other, all of them with their arms around you.

the three of them had fallen asleep a few minutes ago after one hour of you telling them everything about azriel and a lot of cups of tea and tissues.

you thought they would've been mad at you but they didn't. 

they reassured you several times that it was okay and that you could take all the time in the world until you were ready after you tried to apologize too many times.

now you were staring at the ceiling thinking about your options.

you couldn't live like this anymore, knowing that azriel would never love you back. 

so you were going to do the only thing you could in order to protect what was left of your heart.

there was something about your powers that no one knew. something that you never had shared.

you had a switch.  

one that you could turn on and off whenever and wherever you wanted.  

in the same way that you could feel everything, you could also feel nothing.

the only problem? everything that made you, you, would disappear.

but it was also your solution to your situation.

you closed your eyes and gave a deep breath.

you focused on your breathing for a minute and then. . .

no more emotions.

no more feelings.

no more love.

no more sadness.

no more pain.

no more tears.

you turned it off.

when you opened your eyes again, you were numb.

you didn't feel a single thing. 

good.

a/n: thank you for reading!

general taglist: @emryb @fantasyandshit @azrielover @shadowsingercassia @brieflyclassymortal @lilah-asteria @lure-of-writing @pruvii @olive-main @mybestfriendmademe @anuttellaa

dividers by @cafekitsune

[velarismorningstar]

had some fun with picrew :)

i struggled a bit with nesta's hairstyle, because i wanted her to have her signature coronet, but i wasn't really happy with the way the coronet option looked on her so i had to improvise a little lol - just imagine the braids are really messy.

also, peep the lesbian flannel on em hehehehe

(and i gave the females sparkles, because i like women better than men.🫵)

[velarisdusk]

I Slept with Someone in Wings of Illyria

A Bat Boys Band AU

word count: 1.5k author's note: i have not been able to stop thinking about bass player az, nor have i been able to shut up about it (exhibits A, B, and C found here lol). i am so taken with bass player azriel that this was originally gonna be a one time thing to get the mf thoughts out of my head, but i may make this a collection of drabbles/one-shots/whatever the fuck. enjoy ! <3 ✦ . AU Masterlist . ✦ ✦ . Masterlist . ✦

The room is sweltering, the kind of heat that clings to your skin and wraps around your throat. Bodies pressed together, arms raised, the crowd surges with the beat, their cheers deafening as the final notes of the song fade out. 

Cassian tosses his drumsticks in the air, catching them with a grin as he leans back, his chest heaving from the sheer energy of his playing. His skin glistens under the stage lights, sweat dripping down the sharp cut of his jaw to his bare chest. Rhysand steps forward, guitar slung low on his hips, running a hand through his sweat-damp hair, the movement so casual it borders on taunting. 

The three of them are magnetic—untouchable—but your eyes are glued to Azriel. 

The bass still hangs low across his hips, his dark shirt clinging to his chest and arms, every inch of him shining with effort and heat. His hair sticks to his forehead in damp strands, but he doesn’t seem to care. There’s a faint curve to his lips as he looks out at the crowd, their screams refusing to die down even as Rhys steps up to the mic.  It’s Wings of Illyria’s last song of the night, and the air is thick with anticipation.

“Alright, alright,” Rhys says, his voice rich and smooth, but it barely registers over the roar of the audience. He glances back at Az and Cass, shaking his head with a laugh, and you catch the way they all exchange a look—silent, knowing.

Cass twirls a drumstick between his fingers, grinning wide. Rhys throws a wink at the crowd, and Azriel… Azriel holds up a hand, palm out, a subtle watch this gesture that has your stomach flipping. 

And then he steps forward.

The moment his fingers graze the mic stand, the noise dips. He leans in, his lips brushing the mic, and inhales sharply. The sound carries through the speakers, intimate, like he’s right there beside you. The crowd freezes, the energy shifting into something electric, breathless. And then, he chuckles.

It’s low, almost a growl, and it sends a shiver down your spine. For a moment, the room is still. And then, chaos. The screams erupt again, louder than before, like every single person in the crowd had been seized by something primal and uncontrollable.

Azriel laughs, throwing a glance over his shoulder at Rhys and Cass. They’re laughing too, Cassian smacking a hand against his drums while Rhys shakes his head, mouthing something you can’t make out. 

But then Az turns back to the mic. 

Your heart stops as he adjusts it slightly, his hand steady, his expression calm but sharp, focused. The moment stretches, and you swear he looks right at you before his lips part, and his voice spills into the venue. 

It’s not Rhys’s voice this time, not the smooth, cocky tone that usually owns the opening of this song. No—this is something darker, rougher, saturated with a raw kind of emotion that makes your knees go weak. You know this part by heart—hell, you’ve screamed it in your car more times than you can count—but hearing Azriel sing it? It’s like hearing it for the first time. 

He owns it, every word dripping with purpose, with heat. His voice snakes through the room, curling around you, pulling you under. The crowd is a blur, the sound of their cheers distant compared to the way your pulse pounds in your ears. 

And Azriel knows it. He’s fully in control, commanding every single person in the room with nothing but his voice and the intensity in his eyes. When he glances over at Rhys and Cass again, they’re grinning like they know exactly what he’s doing—and exactly what it’s doing to everyone in the room. 

You’re breathless by the time he finishes the verse, and when he pulls back from the mic with that faint, wicked smirk, the crowd surges again, screaming louder than ever. 

You scream too, the sound ripping out of you without restraint, caught up in the heat and the pounding bass still thrumming through the room. But then Azriel’s gaze sweeps across the crowd, scanning the sea of faces, and it lands on you. 

Your breath catches. 

It’s brief, a flicker of his hazel eyes locking onto yours, but it’s enough. Enough to leave you wondering if he’s seen you before—if he’s noticed you at every show you’ve managed to get into, always in your usual spot near the edge of the stage, close enough to feel the pulse of the speakers in your chest. 

And then he turns back to the mic, and your chest tightens all over again. 

It’s the way Azriel shifts his stance—shoulders squared, leaning slightly into the mic as his fingers curl around the neck of his bass—that holds you captive. His voice joins Rhys’s in the next verse, a low harmony that wraps around the melody like smoke, rich and addictive. 

When the lyrics take a turn—something dark and suggestive, dripping with innuendo—you swear he looks at you again. His lips curl just so around the words, and the way his hand moves on the fretboard has your pulse racing. 

It’s stupid, you tell yourself. Ridiculous, really, to think that someone like him would single you out of a crowd like this. But as the song builds to its peak, the heat of his gaze feels too intentional to ignore. And then they hit the chorus, when Azriel takes over the melody for one shining moment, he sings a line that makes your cheeks burn, makes your hands curl into fists at your sides. It’s not subtle. It’s meant to be filthy, meant to tease and taunt, and he sings it like it’s directed straight at you. 

The crowd loses it. You barely hear the screams over the pounding of your heart.

He’s still looking at you when the song ends, sweat dripping from his temple as he lets the bass hang low against his hips, his breathing heavy. Cassian slams his drumsticks against the snare one last time, punctuating the end of the set, while Rhysand tosses his guitar pick into the crowd with a lazy smirk. 

Azriel doesn’t move for a moment. He stays there, on the edge of the stage, as if waiting for something. 

And then he winks. 

It’s quick—blink-and-you’ll-miss-it—but you see it. You feel it. 

Your knees go weak, your grip tightening on the barricade to keep yourself steady. By the time you process what just happened, he’s already turning away, laughing at something Cassian said as they disappear backstage. 

The crowd surges again, desperate for an encore, but all you can hear is the pounding of your pulse. 

Your knees are still trembling as the crowd surges around you, voices raised in chants for an encore. You try to breathe, to ground yourself, but the memory of Azriel’s smirk and the weight of his gaze keeps playing on a loop in your mind. 

And then, just as the noise reaches a fever pitch, you see him again. 

Azriel lingers near the side of the stage, his bass slung over his shoulder now, his hand reaching out to clasp the shoulder of a man in a black security shirt. You watch, heart pounding, as they exchange a few quick words, the guard leaning closer to hear him over the din. 

It’s casual—normal, probably—but then Azriel points.

Directly at you. 

You freeze. Your pulse spikes. There’s no way, you think. No way this is happening. 

But it is. His arm extends toward the crowd, his finger cutting through the haze of heat and lights to land right where you’re standing, gripping the barricade for dear life. The security guard nods, glancing in your direction as Azriel leans closer, lips moving again. 

He says two words, slow enough for you to catch even at this distance.

“Blue top.”

Your breath hitches, your gaze darting down to the shirt you’re wearing. Blue. Not just blue—bright blue, standing out against the darker tones of the crowd like a beacon. 

You look back up, your heart slamming in your chest as Azriel straightens, throwing one last glance your way before disappearing offstage. 

For a moment, you just stand there, frozen, every nerve in your body buzzing. Did that really just happen? Your mind races, replaying the movement of his hand, the way his lips had formed those words. Blue top. 

Your gaze darts around, scanning the crowd. Maybe you imagined it. Maybe you’re losing your mind because surely he didn’t mean you. But your stomach flips again as you realize—no one else around you is wearing blue. Not a single person. 

It was you. 

Your fingers tighten on the barricade. He had pointed at you. You’re sure of it. And then you see him. 

The security guard is cutting through the clusters of venue workers. Your breath catches when his eyes land on you, sharp and direct. He doesn’t say a word, just jerks his chin toward the end of the barricade, a silent instruction. 

[froggybogwitch]

Cass is a million times more interesting when u trans his gender. I will live and die on this hill.

[lib-arts]

House of Wind squad x Star Wars 🎃

Art by me

Nessian as Han Solo and Princess Leia

Gwyn as Rey

Emerie as Ahsoka

[aphroditeofcnidus]

Cassian needs to understand that being a bastard is not necessarily the reason some people don't like him or that some women reject him.This only serves as an excuse that keeps him from recognizing his mistakes.The first thing he does when he meets Nesta is insulting her in her own house,then he can't stop taunting,harassing and verbally abusing her.He stalks her and tells her that she is unlovable,while she's depressed.This leaves her trembling.And yet the reason she doesn't want to be around him is that he's a bastard.

The same goes with the Illyrians.Yes,it's true that some are prejudiced.But Devlon for example, might be sexist but doesn't despise bastards,in fact he gives them equal opportunities.If he didn't want Cassian to rise in the ranks,he wouldn't let him participate in the Blood Rite,given that he had seen both his potential and his friendship with the future HL.But now he calls him Rhysand's dog and Cassian thinks it's because he's a bastard,who became a general and not because he has actually become Rhysand's dog.

Cassian should just stop hiding behind his origin and reflect on his behaviour.It is the only way to become a better mate,a better general and a better person.

[violetscar656]

"Emotions and Memories of Past" - Aftermath Part 2

Summary: Y/N is a member of the inner circle, sister to Rhysand and Cassian, best friend of Azriel. After the war and opening up to Azriel; she is now going on a mission, and needs to face another past.

Warnings: Kidnapping, torture, death, mention of mental illness, blood, mentions of wing cutting, graphic (sorta?)

Author’s note: Part 2 is here, and it’s kinda long and angsty. First of all thank you to everyone who has liked part 1. Secondly, if you didn’t read part 1, I highly suggest you do so to have a base for this one and the next. Comments are open to all suggestions, ENJOY!

“Are you ready?” I said standing in the balcony, ready to take flight

“Always” came an excited response

“Let's go for then”

The city of Velaris is beautiful at night, flying next to Y/N always made my mind go quiet

“You're falling behind”, you said, flying in front

“More like letting you win”

“Then catch me if shadowsinger” came a voice full of smiles

Azriel smiles at the memory; how long has it been since you two have flown together without worry, maybe before Amarantha?

Dawn cracking, Azriel stepped onto the training ground. It was an hour before Cassian was here, he started with his usual warmup

Shadow whispering, Azriel didn’t need to turn his back to see his brother walking

“You're up early” Ariel says, continuing with squats

“Yeah, figured both of us needed this” Cassian joins in, and starts with stretches

“What do you mean, brother?” Azriel stops mid squat and looks at him

“You're barely here, brother” Cassian huffs “Any free time you have, you're helping Elain,” Cassian responds, not bothering to look at Azriel, his focus on the high kicks

“What? Is that what I am doing? Wait, is that Y/N was so distant…. No, it can't be, I am always here for her, surely she knows that-- right?

Azriel goes down and starts with a plank “Yeah well, Rhys asked me to look after her”

“There is a difference between looking after and practically being her shadow” Cassian grunts up, holding his leg high

Azriel, falls his brother's words surprised him

Cassian, amused, turns towards Azriel, stopping his stretches, “Oh come on, you have to know that Az”. He puffs and offers a hand to him, Azriel takes it  “Tell me one thing, brother” voice serious, “Do you love her?”

Azriel goes silent, his shadows quite

Do I love Elain? I don’t know, what I feel for her is it love? I don’t have much experience in that. He remembers what Rhys told him, loving someone is not just attraction, it is also peace of mind and heart. I don’t think my mind has been quite with her.

Azriel gets out of his stupor “Honestly, I don’t know” and with that truth, they began sparring.

---

You jerk up from bed, the sound of clashing swords waking you up. You get moving, seeing from your bedroom window the two Illyrian soldiers, you smile at the image in front of you, the normalcy in it, Maybe I’ll ask Feyre to paint it; with that thought, you get moving, to start a very, very long day

“Good morning” You sing, taking a seat at the dining table

“Morning, sweets” Cassian says, out of full oatmeal, one eyebrow raised

You scoff, “Swallow first, brother”, You feel a tug on your foot, looking down at the shadow creeping up your leg, you allow it

“You look ready to leave” Noticing your Illyrian leathers, Azriel points to your daggers “Exactly what manner is this mission?”

Swallowing, you say, “Hmmm, a level 5 or 6 , maybe” You take another bite

“Where will you be going?” Cassian asks, interested in this mission

You're quiet for a second, “Illyria” You confidently reply, not letting the past bother you

You take your gaze off your plate to the males sitting with you, Cassian's face alarmed, Azriel’s face unreadable but eyes full of fear and rage.

You sigh, “Don’t you two please, have some faith in me” You try to assure them “Brother, you taught me well”  You say, looking at him “and Az, have a little confidence in your training!, you know I won’t get caught”

“But, you were” Azriel's voice barely on leash

“That was ages ago, I have grown since then, and also -see?” You take out the faebane antidote from your pocket “All prepared” you hum

Cassian let out a loud breath “Do you have to go alone? At least let me handle Devlon”

“Cassian” You look in his eyes and you let him see the need to go alone to go from here, even if it's to Illyria, a second passes by

You get up, “I should get going” with that, you leave

--

Flying towards Windhaven, you can’t help but think about, what happen the last time you came here alone. You didn’t say the whole story to anyone-

You were tied in some sort of dungeon, eyes blinded, sharp, piercing pain consumed you, dullness, sudden dizziness, and intense pain. No, no you knew what this was

“This whore thinks she better and stronger” a male voice said “Just because of a little magic and wings”

“W-what” You said, voice like gravel “Faebane” You concluded, struggling with the last energy you had left, too panicked, your mind wasn’t yours at the time. No this can't be, my magic, I can’t reach for it, Is this how it’ll end for me?

At least you knew the kidnappers will also not survive this, your family will destroy them. Family, your family, you can’t leave them, not like this, and Gods, Azriel, no, you couldn’t go before you tell him, no you refuse to give up like this. Az-Azriel he taught you well how to get out of the situation.

“Hmmm” Another male voice came ”We did get rid of her magic, wings on the other hand”, The second male voice said “I think I am going to enjoy keeping them, you know” You feel a hand grabbing your chin “ You know, as a trophy”

Utter PURE RAGE filled you, but you had to be patient, you trying to move but fail

“Oh, bird that is not gonna work” the second male said “I should get things prepared, you know, trapped birds’ wings are cut”

Fearmixes up with the rage you felt

You wait, for the coast to get clear, your hearing trying to pick up how many are near you, silence, you thank the mother before you began-

You move your bound hands to the wall behind to loosen the grip of whatever held them, pain so much pain, skin tearing, but you succeeded, the bonds were loose, and you broke them. The smell of blood hits you. And before you realised you moved intentionally, yanking your right wing, shredding it, sheer agonising pain, but you need to move. With your hands free, you remove the blinds, you check your surroundings, nobody. Breaking the rope that bound your feet and some kind of pin to your left wing, you leave

“You bitch” A voice came familiar one the first male, he launches towards you, years of training and instinct guides you.

The male was big, not someone you can’t handle, you move, grabbing him by his arm using his own weight to your advantage and flipping him on his back to the ground. Next, you cover his mouth with one hand, and put your body weight on his legs, noticing a dagger at his waist, you grab it with you other hand and plunge it into his heart.

Good, now you have a weapon. Sudden blinding pain from your wing, you take a look, horror fills in your eyes Madja, she’ll heal it she will you tear the male’s shirt from his dead body and bind your wing so that the blood stops gushing No flying from here.

Mother might have been watching over you, because there was nobody else. You get out and see the night sky, familiar woods greet you, the border of WindHaven, adrenaline buzzing in your body, you run northwest towards the camp. You do not know how long you were running for, or even if you reached the camp; the last thing you remember is a female's voice over you body calling for help

---

You land near the camp gates and walk towards the centre of the camp to let the leader know you have arrived. Curses and growls go in the background, you ignore them

“Devlon” You nod, standing in front of him

Devlon, face of menace, “What are YOU doing here?” His lip curls in disgust “When the High Lord said someone will be coming, I thought it would be one of his lap dogs”

You raise an eyebrow, “My brother does not need to give YOU an explanation” You say voice full of ice “And when it comes to Cassian and Azriel” You step forward “You're intelligent enough not to call them that, especially in front of me” Your eyes promise slow torture

“I’m going to the cabin, and you have one hour to gather all females in training” You declare, and fly towards the cabin

You enter the cabin, drop your bag and take off your jacket and start walking towards to kitchen

You take the teapot out of the cupboard and start filling it up with water-

“Did you arrive safely?” Rhys’s voice echoes,

“Yes I did”, You put the teapot on the stove “Devlon is so delighted to see me” Your voice dripping with sarcasm

“Sister, try to not push him, please? The Illyrian forces fought well in the war” Rhys calmly says

You roll your eyes, “Imagine how well they could have fought if the females were also trained and not clipped”

“He saw you fight, he knows he needs to get serious now”

You snort “NOW being the key word”

Seconds of silence

“I know better than to tell you not to go to the border, but please, Y/N do not “ concern lining his tone

“I thought you knew better” You say, teasing him, but you have to tell him what you plan “I need answers Rhys” You reply solemnly

Rhysand hesitates, “I-We cannot see you at death's door again” voice clipped with worry  

You feel an ache in your chest “I won't be, and I came prepared” You say softly, taking the tea leaves and adding them to the boiling water. From where you were standing, you see something move near your jacket on the couch, your eyes widened in disbelief.

“THAT PRICK OF A SHADOW BOY” You shout mentally and out loud

“You tell him he is DEAD when I get back, and I swear Rhys, if he comes here unannounced, the night court spymaster position will be open, DO YOU GET IT?

“Okay, alright, I will tell him, but why?” Rhys asks amused

“Why? WHY! Because a shadow followed me, that’s why!” you practically roar

Rhys chuckles, “Although I doubt you'll do major damage to the male you love, but still got it” His voice is more relieved than you would like

You huff in anger, taking the cup of tea, sitting on the couch, glaring at the shadow, it recoils and hides behind the jacket.

“Did your master send you?” you ask the shadow, it comes out and goes left and right, as if to say no,

“Then what you followed me on your own will?” the shadow goes up and down, and you understood it wanted to say yes

You were wondering how it was possible, when you remember the shadow crawling up your leg at breakfast

“You hid in my jacket pocket, didn’t you?” an answer more than a question, the shadow goes up and down

You sigh, not able to be angry at the shadow, “Okay, this is what we do, you can come with me to the camp” The shadow dances “But you need to stay hidden” The shadow agrees

“And no reporting to Azriel” The shadow stops, you just stare at it, then it twirls around you. Okay we are in agreement then

--

You enter a weapons shop, frustrated at the lack of training the females are getting in the camp, Devlon making the excuse of war for every other problem you point out

“Hello welcome” the female behind the counter says

“Hello” You say, surprised to see a female behind the counter, and even more to see she isn’t clipped

She giggles, “A lot of people give me that look” You blink and mask your expression

“No, no, it is okay please, how can I help you” The shopkeeper asks

You sit down and explain to her the practice swords you want to be made, for the females in training, the weight, the height and the grip designed for them.

“So, you look someone in power, can I ask who you are?” The shopkeeper asks

“Oh shit! Where are my manners I’m Y/N,” you say, completely forgetting to introduce yourself, maybe Devlon did get on your nerves

The shopkeeper smiles, “Nice to meet you Y/N, I’m Lucy” You grin at her

The next day, you go to the training grounds earlier than expected, you see the males training but none of the females, and frustration rises. You go inside the tower to speak with Devlon, when a hand grabs yours. You whip, forcing the body towards the wall, unsheathing a dagger,

Scared green eyes meet yours, one of the females in training

“Sorry” You say “What is wrong?” you ask her, sheathing your dagger near your ribs

Her voice is hardly audible “Meet us near the old willow tree, by nightfall, we have a message”

We? Old willow tree,- oh by the grave, -near the border, you sigh

You nod to the female and head up the tower. It’s time to push the sorry excuse of a leader.

---

There were no words to describe how you felt; Devlon was a bastard. He babbled on about power and how females do not have the honour to wear siphons, even commented on your magic, calling it untamed; he told you to show how well you can fight, as if being the General’s second was not enough. Well, you did love the look on his face after beating his top 3 warriors this camp. You sat in the armchair in the cabin, the shadow that followed you bouncing around you, trying to cheer you up

“You are gonna stay here when I go” and immediately the shadow shakes

“I need to visit someone before the meeting” the shadow shakes again, you sigh “Okay, you can come, but you leave me alone before the meeting” The shadow stills, and slowly goes up and down, you give it a small smile

You sheath yourself with every weapon you have, not knowing what will happen near the borders, or to know if this was some sort of trap.

Dagger check, antidote check, sword check you look around, thin trendle slithers up and goes in the pocket- shadow check

You stop by a flower shop near the willow tree, and get lilies. Heart aching, you were going to visit someone whom you haven’t for over 50 years, someone whom you told everything to, someone who you miss terribly-   

“H-hi mom” You whisper, eyes lined with tears

“I got your favourite” You lay down the bouquet on the grave

“I am fine, I am doing good, sorry I didn’t come here for a while. It’s Rhys' fault he hid us” you say “To protect, yes, but still” You say, half sobbing

“I miss you mom” You go down on your knees and start crying

This is the only place you showed your true emotions now, only place you expressed them openly without hesitation

Night is about to fall “A-and then he caught me staring at him” you say sitting next to the grave, eyes puffy with tears, You notice the sky and say “Mom I would love to sit and talk more but I need to get going” a sad smile come to your face “I’ll come again, soon this time, bye” giving a flying kiss you turn and exit the graveyard; nearing the tree you halt and look towards the dark corner

You raise your eyebrow, “We need to go” thin tendril comes out of the dark and circles your wrist “I am okay, let’s go”

--

You hide, taking cover by the tree just like Azriel taught you,

“Spying is the work of patience, silence and knowing your surroundings. Master these things, and you’d make a decent spy” Azriel told you when you asked him to train you

“And how about the unreadable face” You asked cocking up your head

Azriel smirked, “I’ll be impressed if you master that”

You hear footsteps, then mumbling, you try to figure out what it is

“I know she will come, just be patient and try not to look suspicious” a female voice said, no THE female voice said

You tilt your head to see 2 females, both in training, and wait, is that Lucy?

You look at the surroundings and then get out “I am already here” You say, eyes darting between the females

“What is going on here?” Your face unreadable

Lucy was the first one to speak, voice hushed, “We need your help” she pauses, take breath  “There are suspicious activity going on near the borders” She says, walking towards you “Females are disappearing, for months” she says “And if they are found-“ she stops her face going pale

Voice low, the female with green eyes comes forward, “T-they don’t have their wings, and are either dead or near death” Your heart starts pounding, the mask of cold slowly shattering

You take a deep breath, a knowing sensation comes to you; you get yourself together “How long?” Your voice, more stable than you thought

“It’s mostly happening randomly, there is not one particular camp, that is why it’s going unnoticed” The female with green eyes said “But, guessing by what we know, years maybe” her voice filled with sorrow

The shadow flies from your pocket, goes to a distant

“How do you all kn-

The shadow tugs at your hand, silencing your words

“Wait here” You follow the shadow and see a group of males coming your way, “Go and tell him to come to the cabin” Your voice is barely a whisper “Unnoticed”

You rush to the females, “Someone is coming, I got your message, we need to leave from here” You tell them “Start with any random story that pops in your head, we laugh and walk towards your shop, Lucy” They all nod

---

You needed a drink, with the dreadful things you heard, the females who survived either killed themselves or went into deep depression. The description they gave was do familiar to what happened years ago. The female with green eyes, her name was Sara, and the other one Ruby  

You turn towards Lucy “Please tell me you have alcohol” Lucy huffs out a laugh, reaches down the counter and takes amber colour liquid and 4 glasses

“May the Gods bless you, Lucy” that, from Ruby, the first sentence you heard her say

You welcome the burn of the liquor and finally ask “How do you all know this, and how did you guys get involved in this?”

Sara and Lucy glance at Ruby, she speaks up “They killed my twin” Ruby stares on the ground “I do not know if you will believe us, but this is a group”--“I know people in other camps, they confirmed this”  she sighs “A group of manic males, who deserve worst sentence than death”

“They deserve slow, painful torture” You say

You knew this was all true, you just knew it, something very similar happened to you, but you got out, you fought. But the other females could not, even if they survived, their lives had no meaning, not to them. You knew what to do

Resolve dawning on your face “I’ll help you out, actually you’ll help me out” You say firmly “I cannot have 2 females in training risk their necks” You sigh, looking at Lucy “And you fall under less than 1% female population in Windhaven”

“I’ll speak with Rhysand, and make sure Devlon doesn’t get to know this” You say, looking at all three of them “You all can gather the information, but that is all, that’s the line”

Ruby speaks up in anger, “I need my revenge”

“No” You glare at her “What you need is to survive and learn how to fight properly” You say, putting up the mask of cool

You get up, looking at all three of them, voice filled with understanding, “I will not let this go, you 3 trusted me enough to tell this, then please trust me on this as well” You assure them

---

Azriel was sitting in Rhysand’s office, all three brothers present, having much-needed time together and whiskey. He explained how he did not send the shadow, and how the threat you made to his life was, well, cute.

Rhys laughs “That is true, Y/N will not be able to hurt you” Azriel hums with a much-needed buzz “But not for the reason you think, brother” Rhys spits out, Azriel raises up an eyebrow

“Well, we do know she can do major damage to you, Az” Cassian cuts in

They start a conversation on various topics, laughing when-

Cassian notices the shadow sneaking in from the bottom space of the door; he taps Azriel’s shoulder and points at it

The shadow goes to Azriel, whispering

Azriel shoots up the, gone was the relaxation, gone was the buzz; Rhys and Cassian just stare at him

“She needs me” with that he left

---

You entered the cabin with a grim look and possibly information that would make one deadly mission. You stood in the doorway and looked towards the living room. Guess he isn’t here yet. You sat down in the armchair, head down, hands at your forehead, all your things packed. The box inside your chest cracking ever so slightly. The sound of the door opening drew your attention. You looked up and saw him.

You can't help yourself, you're walking before you know, and you pull Azriel into a hug.

He returns the gesture, hugging you tight, letting go, he scans you for any injuries “What is wrong?”

You look at his silver-lined eyes “Winnow me to the Town House” Your voice small

Azriel's brow furrowed “You called me here to winnow?” His voice with disbelief, “Y/N do you even know how worried I was?”

The box inside cracks more, a tear slips from your face “Azriel, please, I’ll tell you everything, but I need to tell all of you together”

---

You sit in the armchair in Rhysand’s office, the air thick with tension. It’s been five minutes since you told them what you found out. You pour another glass of whiskey for yourself. Cassian walks up to you, takes the bottle, and pours one for himself.

Azriel break the tension “We do not know how true is this information” ever the spymaster

You take a long sip “I know it is true” a heartbeat of silence “I know it is true because” you take another sip “they tried to do the same thing to me” you say voice low

“W-what?” Rhys rasp

“The last time I went there, I told you all that I just got kidnapped and drugged me, using faebane” You stare at the group, the box inside your chest is shaking now  “I lied, well, at least half of it” You say voice trembling

“Y/N you don’t have to” you hear Cassian say

You look at Azriel “I don’t have to, but I need to” The box burst open

And you tell them EVERYTHING, the parts you hid , what actually happened in Illyria, how you woke up in the dungeon, what the male said about your wings, how you escaped, how the last thing you remembered was a voice, and the next thing you remember was waking up in the healing chambers with Mor by your side. You didn’t know when you started crying, when Azriel came next to you and held you.

You look up “R-rhys?” you say

Rhys' face filled with sorrow “Why, why didn’t you tell this to us before?”

You feel the guilt “I didn’t want to be weak” Your voice a sad whisper

“Fuck” you hear Cassian grunt “Y/N when did we ever give you the impression that you are weak” he stands in front of you, and bends to your level  “Sister, you are strong, the things you have faced and live through not everybody can” You look in his eyes and see the sadness and truth there

You just stayed silent, but your foot was tapping, a tell of yours, that there is more

Cassian takes a step and notices “What is it?” You stand up from the armchair and take 2 steps forward

You look at Azriel, who just nods in understanding, and you take a deep breath

“I lost you” You said, looking at Rhy’s “And you too” You said, looking at Cassian “I almost lost my brothers” You said, tears crawling back

Understanding dawns on Rhysand’s face, and his face turns white as a ghost. He knew you were troubled after the war, but this, he didn’t imagine this. He walks towards you and hugs you, your head plastered to his chest, and immediately you start to sob

“I’m sorry” Rhys says  “I should have known better” he cups your face and starts wiping your tears “Y/N, listen to me angel, we are here, you don’t have to talk about this now if you don’t want to” he releases your face and holds you hand “But if you want to then we are ready to hear”

You muster up a sad smile, “I don’t wanna cry anymore”

You meet Cassian’s gaze, worry and confusion in his eyes, you look at Azriel who shakes his head, you sigh, “Telling them makes it better?” You ask, looking at Azriel

“It does” He replies with a soft smile “They’ll understand”

“You two need to sit” you say to your brothers

---

Exhausted! That’s what you were standing in your bedchambers in the House of Wind, you came back here despite the protest of Rhys, and Cassian’s demand that he carries you, you told them to stop becoming mother hens, but still, voicing your feelings that’s been piling up for months and years to them out and not just to your mother, you felt lighter than you ever did. Well, at least you didn’t confess your feelings to Azriel, you could not figure out if you were relieved or not about it; you changed into your nightgown, unbound your hair-

“Y/N?” You hear someone knocking at the door,

Opening it you were not surprised to see the male “Az”

Azriel leans on the doorframe and stares at you,

“What” You ask with a chuckle

Azriel’s gaze feels like an imprint “Just wanted to check up” He says coolly

“What are you doing standing there? Come in” You say

“I wasn’t invited in” Az replies

You snort moving inside “Since when do you need an invitation?- and to reply to your previous question, I’m much better” You smile at him “Thank you”

Azriel steps into your room, feeling of calm hitting him “Since there were so many confessions tonight,- I have one to make” Your heart starts pounding “I’m sorry, Y/N, I haven’t been around that much”

Your breath hitches, “It-its okay Az-

“It's not” He steps into your space, grabbing your arms gently “I didn’t mean to do it, I didn’t even realise it”

He cups one side of your face, your heart practically skips a beat “You were so strong tonight, dove”

“I don’t know about that” you say as nonchalantly as possible

“You were” Azriel says with a smile, you were just able to nod

This, this is the moment you wanna stay in forever, Azriel holding you close, his scent calming your nerves; couple of minutes past by

“I should go” Azriel states, voice hoarse

You smile “Okay” Your smile spreads “Goodnight Azzie”

Azriel smiles, eyes pools of warm honey, “Goodnight, dove” With that, he leaves your room

---

Azriel can't help but feel a warmth in his chest, maybe because things are slowly getting the way they used to be. He flops on his bed She cried a lot today, I have to make sure it doesn’t happen again. He flops again Her hair was looking like the night sky, dark and shiny, I wonder how they feel. He jolts up Why am I thinking about her hair? For fuck sake I need to get it together, I’m pretty sure she looks at me like a brother” He walks into his bathroom, slashing water on his face Although, I don’t think she ever called me a brother- did she?

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

Note: I know, I know, I went in a different direction on this, but I had to do some explaining for the end of part 1, and it all ties up in the end (the other part/parts) . I had to do a character build-up.

My taglist <3: @the-onlyy-angie @lreadsstuff @xadenswhore

[romanticatheartt]

Nesta and her very tall mate...

2 days later:

inspired by this

[readychilledwine]

Okay, I have a request for you that is no pressure, but Reader enjoys praise loves when she is being acknowledged for doing good and being good but doesn't know how to accept but their lover(and I have no idea would best fit this. My heart says Cassian, but realistically, it's probably Az or Eris) talks them through it shows them they don't need to be flustered.

Please ignore if this makes no sense

Self Worth

Summary - Cassian can't stand seeing you so low

Warnings - insecure reader, praise, mentions of mental health slipping

A/N - just a little baby fic of how Cassian would handle his mate needing her self-esteem and self worth built up 💕

✨️Cassian Masterlist✨️General Masterlist✨️

"Look me in my eyes and tell me the female I love isn't good enough again," Cassian was being as gentle as he could. You were shying away from him, eager for his praise, but instantly falling into that shell the second he gave it. "Look me in my eyes and tell me why the female I love cannot look at me after I tell her how beautiful she is today."

"I-" The words died on your tongue. No excuse you could find would appease him. No excuse would make him forgive you for whispering to him that you weren't enough. Weren't brave enough, pretty enough, strong enough. You saw the way he admired Nesta and Feyre. The way he admired Mor.

You didn't see the way he looked at you, though. He looked at you as if you had made the very world, as if you had forged him to be exactly how you needed him to be. You pushed him yo be that male, pushed him to be better. To be good. You made Cassian see the beauty in the world, the beauty in others. Perhaps that is why it hurt him that you could not see the beauty in you.

"I just never feel like I'm doing enough. Like there's no way you want me, want my body, want me to be-"

"Stop," he interrupted you immediately. He hid the break in his voice so well, hid how just a few words instantly shattered his heart. "You're struggling again, aren't you angel?" His eyes studied you hard as you nodded silently. "Y/n, you've been working so hard for Rhys, being the perfect emissary. You single handedly started the process of him and Tamlin creating a trade route, of him and Dawn beginning a joint training program between the Peregryn and Illyrians. Angel, you are doing so well and working so hard."

Your chest started to feel heavy, breathing becoming rapid, and Cassian instantly put his hands on your upper arms. He began to exaggerate his breathing, forcing you to follow it and calm down. "You are beautiful, you are special, you are kind. You are my mate, Y/n. You will never have to worry about competition or me not loving a single inch of you. I am proud to be yours. Proud you wanted me."

You looked up at Cassian, eyes lined in tears, "Really? You don't wish I was a.. a fighter?"

He laughed softly, "If you could fight, why would you need me? My job is to protect you. Physically, emotionally, and mentally. Even if that means protecting you from yourself." He leaned in and kissed your forehead. "You are beautiful. Say it for me."

"I-" You paused, taking a deep breath. "I am beautiful."

Cassian's smile grew, "Good job, angel. Tell me five things you love about you."

You bit your lip thinking, "My eyes," he groaned in pleasure at that answer. "My humor," he whispered yes softly. "My butt-"

"Fuck yes your ass," Cassian turned you quickly to smack it before turning you around. "Continue."

You giggled at him, "My kindness," he shut his eyes smiling. "And... I think.."

"No. Not think. You know you love this last thing. Tell me again," he demanded.

You nodded more confidently, "I love my smile." Cassian held your face in his hands again. "Because when I smile, you smile, then I smile more."

"Seeing you glowing and happy makes me happy," he said. "Every day we do 5 things you love about you, then I'm going to spend the day praising them until that self Worth gets back up again, okay angel?"

"Okay, Cassie."

General Taglist:

@hnyclover @glitterypirateduck @slytherinindisguise @mischiefmanagers @bloodicka @starsinyourseyes @the-sweet-psycho @mariahoedt @rinalouu @sarawritestories @starryhiraeth @starswholistenanddreamsanswered @cumuluscranium @loneliestluvr @eternallyelvish @azrielsmate3 @daughterofthemoons-stuff @meritxellao @aria-chikage @hungryforbatboys @lilah-asteria @fandomrejects @sleepybesson @tayswhp @itsswritten @milswrites

[olenvasynyt]

You know something that I’d like to see with the Illyrians? Clothes that actually fit the environment of the Illyrian Steppes. It’s described to be very cold, with brutal winds (duh it’s called Windhaven) but their battle armor just doesn’t really fit that? Even Nesta is like “yo I’m freezing where is the furs?” and Emerie is like “yeah it’s pretty expensive.” Yall, do you know how common hunting and furs would be? It would be a widely needed thing so maybe it’s more expensive if you’re not a hunter / you’re poor, but 1. They’re a warrior race in an isolated wilderness, they would for sure hunt, and 2. Clothes that fit the environment should be a pretty common thing instead of skin tight leathers. Skin tight leathers is crazyyyyyy when it’s that fucking cold. Like, yeah sure Cassian is like Illyrians are all about gritting your teeth and barring the cold, BUT I think your army dying of hypothermia might be important to avoid lmao. And when it comes to flying it can help, plus leather and furs is still light compared to other armor so I don’t think it would be too heavy for flying. They carry around a shit ton of metal weapons lmao.

And because I love visuals, I would love to see Illyrian leathers looking more like Mongol / Kazakhstan / Turkish, where weather is extreme and winters are very long and brutal.

[silverflameataraxia]

Forget the growing Valkyrie/Illyrian conflict. I need to see some Valkyrie/IC conflict next book.

Rhysand's treatment of Nesta was so horrendous that it triggered memories of Ember's abuse at the hands of the Autumn King. And it was so awful that Ember stood up for Nesta and defended her from Rhysand. Keep in mind that Nesta was a social pariah at that point in time and Ember didn't know if she would be punished or executed, but she chose to stick up for Nesta anyways because Rhysand's treatment of Nesta was so triggering for Ember. Even after that, Ember asked if there was anything else she could do to take some of the blame off of Nesta.

Nesta can't continue to summarize her mistreatment as her getting into a fight with her family and disappearing for a week with Cassian. At some point Gwyn and Emerie are going to see Rhysand's treatment of Nesta for themselves and they're going to find out how often he threatens to kill her, and they're not going to be too happy about it. I'm sure it's going to trigger some memories for them, too (especially Emerie). And when they find out Nesta's not even safe around her own mate, who does absolutely nothing to protect her from Rhysand? I don't see any narrative where they don't call out Cassian, Rhys, and the IC for their BS.

I need Nessian to go the route of Elorcan in KoA. I need the Valks to, at least somewhat, turn against Cassian like the MC's turned against Lorcan in ToG. I need 600 pages of not knowing whether or not Nessian is going to be endgame. I need Nesta to consider rejecting the mating bond, and Cassian having to come to terms with how badly he failed her for her to seriously consider it. I need 600 pages of him groveling and worshipping the very ground she walks on. I need to hear Cassian say "I love you" to Nesta, as well as him having entire monologues where he just can't stop listing all the reasons he loves her. I need him to trust her and her decisions. I need 600 pages of him finally behaving like a mated male.

I need the Valkyries to help him understand that the IC is the biggest threat to Nesta. I need him and the Valks to shut down any insults the IC hurl Nesta's way. I need them to stick up for her, and defend and protect her. I need to see Cassian protect Nesta from Rhysand. I need to see him prioritize Nesta and her feelings. I need to see him treat her like the princess she is. I need him to romanticize the avid romance reader. I need him to cherish Nesta's heart, rather than rip it to shreds in his temper tantrums.

I need 600 pages of Cassian finally choosing Nesta over the IC.

[sjmromanceweek]

♡ Announcing SJM Romance Week 2025! ♡

Hello everyone! Valentine’s Day 2025 is coming up, and that means it's time to celebrate any and all ships related to Sarah J. Maas' work. This will be a week-long event and we (@moodymelanist & @separatist-apologist) welcome any and all forms of celebration of the various types of love — fics, headcanons, playlists, art, moodboards, or anything in between.

When will this take place? February 8 through February 14, 2025!

Who can participate? Any and all fans of SJM’s couples! From canon to reader to crackships, any and all ships from Throne of Glass, A Court of Thorns and Roses, and Crescent City are welcome! Please remain respectful — the characters are fictional, but the people who ship them are not. Leave the shipping wars at the door.

What are the prompts?

First Kiss — How did your ship's first kiss happen?

First Fight — Why are they arguing? And more importantly, how do they make up?

First "I Love You" — How did your ship first exchange those three little words? Who said it first? Was it planned, or could they just not hold it in anymore? You decide!

Moving in Together — How does your ship go from dating to living together? Tell us!

Favorite Tropes — What are your favorite romance tropes? From enemies to lovers, there was only one bed, forbidden love, love triangles, or something else, use your favorite trope for your ship!

What Comes Next? — What do you see in the future for your ship? Do they settle down, buy a house, and build that white picket fence? Are they traveling the world, or staying close to home? Tell us all about it!

Free Day — You can post anything you'd like to celebrate Valentine's Day!

Please tag @sjmromanceweek and use #sjmromanceweek2025 so we can see your posts! We can’t wait to celebrate a week of love with you all! ♡

[velarisdusk]

and All I Got Was This Stupid Song Written About Me

word count: 1.7k author's note: listen.. i may write but i am no songwriter. i dont wanna hear shit abt these lyrics, i drove myself to madness for HOURS trying to come up with them ✦ . AU Masterlist . ✦ ✦ . Masterlist . ✦

The studio smelled faintly of old coffee and cedar, the latter courtesy of Cassian’s obsession with “ambience candles.” Their flickering glow did little to cut through the dim light of the room, but that was how they worked best—shadows stretching long across the walls, a backdrop of soft atmospheric music mingling with the faint hum of amplifiers. 

Cassian was seated cross-legged on the worn couch, his drum pad balanced precariously on one knee. Rhys sat opposite, his guitar cradled loosely in his lap as his fingers absentmindedly picked out a melody that might, one day, become something. 

Azriel lounged across the arm of a chair, his legs draped over one side, notebook in hand. He’d been silent most of the night, pretending to be engrossed in writing, but he hadn’t added a word in over an hour. His pulse thrummed low and steady, though it felt like it was trying to climb into his throat. 

He cleared it instead. “I, uh…” His voice broke the lull, and both heads turned to him, expectant. “I’ve been working on something,” he added, tone clipped, casual—too casual. “Thought I’d see what you think.”

Rhys’s guitar fell silent, and Cassian stilled his restless tapping. “Let’s hear it,” Rhys said.

Az’s fingers curled around the edge of his sacred notebook, the slight crinkle of paper betraying his tension. Still, he began to read. 

“Got a taste of sin, it’s dripping off your skin, Lost in your fire, pull me in, Your body’s a drug, and I’m high on the feel, Push me to the edge, make me kneel”

Cassian’s mouth fell open, and Rhys slowly set his guitar down, leaning forward as Az kept going:

“Whisper my name, and I’m already there, Fingers gripping tight, pulling through your hair. Take me in deep, make me lose control, I’m yours to break, body and soul.”

When he finished, the studio was dead silent, save for the faint buzz of the amp. Cassian stared at him like he’d just confessed to a crime. 

“Holy shit.” Cassian let out a low whistle, leaning back and crossing his arms. “Az, I don’t know who did this to you, but she must’ve been a damn good lay.”

Azriel’s jaw tightened, but he schooled his features into a mask of indifference. “It’s just a concept.”

Rhys arched a brow, his lips twitching in amusement. “Sure it is.” He didn’t press, though, only added, “It’s good. Uncomfortably horny, but good. Way different from our usual stuff.”

Cassian grabbed his sticks, tapping out a beat on the drum pad with a lecherous grin. “Let’s lean in, boys. This is the kind of trashy filth that gets crowds throwing bras at us.”

Rhys’s lips twitched into a smirk, and he picked up his guitar again, plucking out something slinky, the kind of riff that felt like it belonged in a smoky, neon-lit club. “It’s dark,” he said, nodding to himself. “Sultry. Needs that dirty edge, though. Cass?”

Cassian’s grin widened as he began hammering out a beat—deliberate, aggressive, a rhythm that hit like a pounding pulse. “You’re singing this, Az.”

Azriel froze, shooting him a glare. “Absolutely not.”

Rhysand chuckled, pointing at him with his pick between two fingers. “You’re the one who wrote this filth, so you’re singing it, lover boy.”

“It’s just a concept,” Az repeated, gritting his teeth.

“Oh yeah?” Cassian retorted, his grin feral. “Then why does it sound like you’re confessing to something you did last night?”

Az opened his mouth to respond, but Rhys interrupted, strumming a riff so suggestive it could’ve been banned on public radio. “Alright, focus, idiots. Let’s make this worth the headache.”

For the next hour, the song began to take shape. Rhys layered intricate licks over Cassian’s primal rhythm, the combination dripping with heat and tension. Azriel’s lyrics were sharpened, punctuated with pauses that hit like clenched fists, every word landing like a whisper pressed against the shell of your ear.

Cassian couldn’t help himself. “‘Tie me down, tear me apart,’” he sang mockingly into the mic, voice exaggeratedly gravelly. “Az, I’m learning so much about you tonight.”

Az snatched the mic out of his hand, deadpan. “Learn to shut the hell up.”

Cassian laughed so hard he almost fell off his stool. “This one’ll wreck them. Absolute filth.”

Rhys leaned back, smiling lazily. “Filthy sells. And Az?” He tilted his head, studying his brother like a puzzle. “Next time you’re uh, inspired, maybe don’t hold back. This is… enlightening.”

Azriel only shook his head, flipping his notebook closed as Cassian howled with laughter, already promising to slap the song on the album. 

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

Midnight wrapped around you like a blanket, the world outside still and quiet. The soft glow of your laptop lit your room as you settled further into bed, earbuds in place, ready for this moment. You’d been counting down for weeks, your excitement bubbling just beneath your skin. Finally, their newest album was here. 

It’d been months since the concert—months since you’d stood in that dark, electric space, his voice carving through the air like a blade. You could still feel the vibrations of the bass in your chest, the heat of the crowd, the way his eyes had found yours for just a second too long.

You hit play, and let the first track wash over you, a rush of gritty guitars and smooth vocals pulling you in instantly. The familiar sound of Rhysand’s honeyed voice wrapped around you, rich and magnetic, while Cassian’s drums hit like a thunderstorm. But it was the deeper, shadowed harmony threading through the background that made your breath catch. 

Azriel. 

Hearing him again sent a shiver through you, unbidden memories tugging at the edges of your mind. You’d spent one unforgettable night with him, his low, dark voice murmuring filthy things in your ear—words that had set your skin on fire and lingered long after the moment ended. His presence had been like gravity, drawing you closer, holding you there, even when you weren’t sure you could take it. 

And now, hearing that same voice woven through the music, backing Rhysand’s lead, was enough to make your pulse race. You didn’t know if you wanted to rewind the track or keep going, chasing that sound, that pull. 

You let it play. Each song unfolded like a gift—raw emotion, sharp edges. You found yourself nodding along, your fingers drumming softly against the blanket as you let the music consume you. But you couldn’t ignore the way Azriel’s harmonies caught your ear, his voice dipping into the pockets of the melody, haunting and magnetic. 

The opening notes slinked through your ears, unhurried but charged, the tempo slow enough to make your breath hitch. This was different. Azriel’s voice took the lead, a rare spotlight for him on a track, with Rhysand providing backup vocals—a reversal of their usual dynamic. It was striking, intimate, and laced with something that felt far too personal.

“Past the greenroom, whispers low, ‘No one’ll see, now don’t let go.’ Your nails, your teeth, the sting, the scrape— Pull me under, I’ll beg, I’ll break.”

You froze.

The blanket bunched in your fists as your mind caught up to what you were hearing. 

No.

Your thumb hovered over the pause button, but you couldn’t press it. The way Azriel sang it—low, raw, and dripping with heat—made it impossible to think straight. His voice wrapped around the lyrics like a confession he hadn’t meant to give, and Rhysand’s smoother backing vocals added a dangerous edge, amplifying every word. 

You yanked one earbud out, your pulse thundering in your ears. For a moment, you just stared at the ceiling, the words looping in your mind like a broken record. But the harder you tried to dismiss it the more the connections gnawed at you. His mouth at your ear, his breath hot against your skin, murmuring reassurance as his hands slid under your shirt. You’d laughed, breathless, trying to quiet yourself as his lips pressed to your neck, but he’d just chuckled, low and dark, “No one’ll see. Just let me feel you.”

And “now don’t let go”—your stomach flipped at the memory. His voice, husky and commanding, echoing through his dressing room as he hauled you into his arms, your legs wrapping around his waist. His teeth grazing your jaw, his hand gripping your thigh. “Now don’t let go, sweetheart,” he’d rasped, right before pressing you into the wall and wrecking you. 

Your breath came shallow, heart racing as the memories sharpened, aligning too perfectly with every word. The song ended, and silence pressed heavy against your ears. Before you could think, your thumb hit replay. 

Your knees tucked up against your chest as the opening notes filled the air again. You closed your eyes, the melody threading through you, every word lodging itself deeper. Was it just your imagination? Or was there something unmistakable in his voice—a heat, a pull, that felt like it was meant for you?

Your chest tightened as the song finished, leaving you breathless and stunned. “No way. No way,” you muttered, shaking your head, but your hands were trembling as you pressed play again. 

You got up, pacing your room with restless energy, the song still blasting through one earbud. Each time you heard it, new details jumped out at you—an inflection here, an ad-lib there. It wasn’t coincidence. It couldn’t be. 

The realization hit you all at once, like a weight in your chest. The lyrics weren’t just abstract poetry. They were something real. They were yours. 

You needed to see them perform this live. You needed to hear Azriel sing those words like looking out at a crowd, to watch the way he carried himself under the stage lights. Would he meet your gaze if you were there? Would he falter, even for a second, knowing you’d heard every word and recognized yourself in them?

And more than anything, you needed to talk to him. To get his attention again, to hear the truth from his lips.