#Structurally
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Doubling down on potentially unpopular opinions elantris>>mistborn era two
#yes yes except Wayne and Steris obviously obviously#I mean overall#Structurally#In terms of the overall arc of the narrative
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they should invent an understanding and intellectualizing your feelings that makes them go away!!!
#like everything im feeling rn can be explained by 1. shortest day of the year 2. lack of structure and physical separation from my friends#3. my brand new anxiety and depression diagnoses#4. [redacted]#but im still feeling so wretched
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alright, I’m annoyed with the class that I’m taking. it’s about writing novels, and I thought it would have cool stuff about balancing your narrative and developing themes etc, but instead she spent the first class talking about how every book fits into the Hero’s Journey (the monomyth template). and I was somewhat of a contrarian, and said “can you give us examples of books that don’t fit into this template?” and she said “no. because all books fit.”
but I dunno man, I just finished reading this Korean book where the plot is just the character having a string of hookups and reflecting on them without changing in any way. I don’t know if it’s possible to contort that into the Hero’s Journey.
#I think the class will still be worth it because she assigns a lot of exercises#and basically all I want is for an external party to force me to write about things that I wouldn’t otherwise#I’ll still come out of this improved in the ways that I want to be#but every time she says something definitive about story structure I’m just like 👀👀👀
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tbh I do not think that Vander is beating the “Claggor is his biological son” allegations
#arcane#arcane spoilers#arcane season 2#vander#claggor#like I’m seeing it now tbh#there’s a big resemblance there in facial structure#like end of the day they’re all his kids bio or not#but he for sure birthed that boy
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today's bug thing is the bug carousel at the Bronx Zoo!
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Big fan of sun motifs in characters not necessarily being about positivity and happiness and how they're so " bright and warm" but instead being about fucking brutal they are.
Radiant. A FORCE of nature that will turn you to ash. That warmth that burns so hot it feels like ice. Piercing yellow and red and white. A character being a Sun because you cannot challenge a Sun without burning alive or taking everything down with them if victorious.
#this post is inspired by my dnd oc Beacon. whom i am workshopping again#gonna turn him into a really like....duty driven but fucking BRUTAL paladin.#The sun also being necessary for life....for structures of society and culture. like.... cmon#The sun is fucking terrifying and yall should recognize that more#ALSO THIS IS A SMALL LOVE LETTER TO HOLLOW KNIGHT'S THE RADIANCE#I LOVE YOU QUEEN!!!! YOU'RE SO SCARY!!!!!!#we need more of Her.
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Murderbot meets ART (who knew transports could be smart enough to be MEAN)
#murderbot#tmbd#the murderbot diaries#secunit#ART#and then art asked if it could do surgery on secunit#mean ol art#not letting secunit just enjoy its comfy chair#probably even has nice upholstery and everything#i am CONSTANTLY thinking about how to represent ART and murderbot's digital interactions visually#and as soon as this one felt right i had to draw it#i refuse to put more effort than this tho#CHAIR is all the environmental structure i have in me rn
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Every time I see an author promoting their debut Greek mythology retelling on twitter I mourn the loss of like. To put in ineloquently. Just using these stories as inspiration for your own. Your story does not need to force itself to fit the shape of Orpheus and Eurydice it’s fine you can just allude to their story!! You can use their themes!! Nobody is going to arrest you for being allegorical instead of literal!! I might eat them alive at this point. It’s the only way.
#like I think you have lost the plot a bit if you follow up ‘retelling’ with a setting so far removed from the original story#that you actively struggle to fit your stolen characters into their original plot structure#also none of them know what feminism is but I digress#talk
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Food Crime: Frosty the Slawman
so a while ago, I saw this photo going around on tumblr:

at first, I thought this was photoshopped. I mean, "welcome new man in your life"? that feels like a translation error, or someone being silly on purpose.
but guess what! turns out, Frosty Slaw Man is real!
and soon...he will be mine. let's get cooking
(full disclosure: I crafted this snowman and took notes about it over a year ago. and then, like with many things in my life, I forgot about him, and let him drift into the ADHD void of Things I'm Not Currently Staring At, where object permanence is tentative and largely unrealized.
but here we are! and here he is: the slaw man. it's time to share him with you, so that you can suffer as I have suffered, and/or rejoice in my gelatin creation!)
so this recipe photo originally came from Mid-Century Menu (archive link), a blog that seems like one after my own heart, and which once tried to make the Slaw Man (with not much success; but we'll get back to that)! but it's not just that blog that has copies of this ad. I also found it on reddit, and in a few different places on ebay!
lookit that guy! he's a real guy!
both the reddit post and some of the ebay listings say that this is from 1963 (though I haven't been able to figure out which magazines it was printed in, to confirm this for myself). but in looking this up, I discovered something else fun! there's another version of this ad!

Best Foods is what Hellmann's stuff is called on the west coast, and the "this is no place for second best" thing makes a lot more sense when you consider that the ad was probably made for Best Foods first, and then just reused and rebranded for the east coast
the more you know!
anyway the benefit of finding this alternate ad is that the scan on this image is a lot clearer, and so the recipe is more readable! and in looking at it, I've realized something important:
when Mid-Century Menu tried this recipe, they got an ingredient amount wrong.
when they made their beloved Slaw Man, they had the water amount written down as 1/4 cup, but looking at this scan up close, it is actually 3/4 cup of water! something that might make a significant difference, considering we're working with gelatin!
(there's also another change I want to make compared to what they did, when I do this recipe. but we'll get into that in a sec.)
for now: we begin
so. there's no way I'm making a Slaw Man this large. I am just one person, and considering the ingredients of this, I don't think I'm going to be able to consume that much Slaw.
two entire heads of cabbage? three pounds of cottage cheese, a thing that I don't even like to eat? no. that's a bad idea.
so I'm starting small here and making this 1/3 the size of the original:
2 packets of unflavored gelatin 1/4 cup cold water 1 cup mayo 1 tsp salt 1lb cottage cheese 4 cups shredded cabbage

surely this will result in a reasonable amount of Man
...okay, I started chopping the cabbage thinking it would be easier, but I've given up and pulled out a grater. this is much better! and somehow more violent (affectionate)

the recipe says to soften the gelatin in cold water, and then stir over hot water until it's dissolved. I'm going to assume "stir over hot water" means a double boiler, so let's do that


hmmm, the gelatin is very foamy? it’s melted, but the bottom of the pot feels really....sticky
okay. after a couple minutes more and no change, I’m calling this good enough.
so one thing that others who have attempted this recipe have not taken into consideration is the cottage cheese. you see, the others used normal cottage cheese, but the recipe says to use "cottage cheese, cream style"
I’ll be real, I’m not 100% what that means, since we don’t have that here. but I can take an educated guess! so let’s blend the cottage cheese!
(with an immersion blender. I am not willing to wash an actual blender because of this)


mmm, yes. very smooth
...actually. why isn't all cottage cheese like this? the thing I hate about cottage cheese is the texture, so why isn't it all smooth and creamy like this?? I could eat this!!
a new discovery is made every day in this house.
okay, time to start mixing things together.

ah, frosty. I opened a whole new thing of mayo for you! do you feel special?
(I'd make a "pre-dinner snack?" joke, but sometimes I think I'm the only one that remembers Regular Ordinary Swedish Meal Time)



okay, the mayo, cottage cheese, and salt have been added to the gelatin. but as this cools, the texture is getting...hmm. less than appealing.
lastly: the cabbage

oh. oh this is not very nice
next it says to pack the "salad" into a one pound container, and two six-cup bowls, but since I made this recipe so much smaller, I'm going to uhhhh. uh. find some bowls that seem like they'd be correct...snowman? proportions?

ah. this bowl is too big.
hey, these'll work!

now I just have to let them chill for a while, and continue another day.
(edit from current!me: ahhh oh my god I forgot this was pretty soon after we adopted Jackie! look at these cat pics that I took while I was food crime-ing!



look at them having their little interactions! Knuckles was trying so hard to be friends with her! I love them)
hello! two days later and we are ready to assemble the slawman. and my sibling has started referring to him as "frosty: attorney at slaw", so that's fun.

I've done a thing where, as these set, I flipped them around in the bowl so that hopefully they'd be more round. we'll see if they actually stay like this.

I have also made some decorations for him out of peppers, olives, and carrots!
let's build our boy

oh he's so heavy. and wobbly
no no no he almost fell over!!
okay. he's fine. but more skewers were needed.
and...okay. he is complete.
behold!


gaze upon my beautiful man!
(he is not structurally sound! he wobbles unsteadily as I rotate him! there are already cracks forming in the gelatin around where his arms are! don't worry about it!)
now it's time to stab him

and...to devour him

this tastes like...a bland coleslaw? and not even that. it's just sort of a salty, cottage cheese-y cabbage. the ingredients don't combine to become something greater, they simply...sit there. like this.
and the texture is...mmm. it's not a jello kind of texture, but it is a bit squashy in a way that's mildly strange.
it's very creamy once it softens in your mouth.
...I don't like this!
and look! taking just that one chunk from him was enough to destabilize him entirely :(


RIP frosty. now I just have to see if I can eat all of you before you go bad.
(note from current!me: I could not.
I ate maybe half of him over the course of many days, often adding other stuff to him to try to add some flavor: bacon, frozen peas, cheese, etc. but even with that, I just couldn't stomach him.
after a while I stuck what was left of him in the freezer, hoping that maybe I'd find the will to consume the rest of him some other day.
do you know what a frozen-and-then-thawed mixture of cabbage, cottage cheese, mayo, and gelatin looks and tastes like?
bad. the answer is: bad.
I threw him out pretty quickly after thawing him.
do not try this recipe at home)
#food crimes#vintage recipe#vintage cooking#frosty slaw man#frosty the slaw man#hellmann's#best foods#(like the brand not the concept of the slaw man)#(he is not the best food. he will haunt me. never again)#I could improve upon him tbh. like there's definitely a form of this that could be edible#but I'd do it with cream cheese for structural integrity instead of gelatin and cottage cheese#he could be more of a cheese ball#that'd be fine#but this? no. don't try this#it's a lot of work for too much slaw and not much flavor
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Snake Bridge on Macclesfield Canal. location: Astbury Congleton, England
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"it's not that deep" not yet but I've got a shovel and fan theories and digging makes great exercise!
#sometimes in literary analysis things line up like an accidental pun#no it's *probably* not intentional but that doesn't make it less amusing#I'm building this theory like reverse jenga not bc it's structurally sound but because the block were lying around & im having a good time#anyway i think we should replace irl conspiracy theories (bigoted rightwing cult behavior)#with elaborate insane viral fan theories that everyone on the internet pretends to take seriously#everyone goading each other on digging up increasingly obscure 'evidence' treating it like it's already been made canon#basically red string and a cork board levels of crazy but make it a social media activity#but at the end of the day it's a joke everybody's in on. Yes And improv at its finest#call that Goncharov's Razor
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♪ It's time for Fish Fact Friday! ♪
The African coelacanth is a living fossil, and one of only two extant species of coelacanth! African coelacanths have vivid blue scales, which distinguish them from the brown-scaled Indonesian coelacanth.
They often reside in underwater lava caves, spending the day resting in the caves and hunting in their vicinity at night. Unlike most other vertebrates, they have a hinge in the back of their skull which allows them to move both their upper and lower jaw simultaneously - this allows them to open their jaws extra wide to catch prey!
#i love how blue they are!#interestingly their blue color is from a pigment and not structural#which is pretty rare if i remember correctly#coelacanth#fishblr#fish art#fish#my art#marine biology#fish fact friday
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something that exists in the city I'm moving to:

I am obsessed with this park that combines all midcentury dangerous playground elements into one awful whole. witness this steep metal slide descending from the top of a jungle gym into a concrete pit
if you fall off the jungle gym, you too will be doomed to the pit
there's very little opportunity to get out, too. the only handholds are the ones on the left. Sendai gets a lot of rain, almost as much as Vancouver, so imagine being mangled from sliding into concrete and having to climb a sheer, slippery slope to freedom. I think I would just make a home down there and give up on life

I'm sure it does.
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i love overeating and posting about it
#the new tos change should die in a ditch forever#it's literally just an excuse to ban fat people and fat liberationists#bitches who don't think fatphobia is structural what are you talking about you're posting on the fatphobia structure
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so: masking: good, unequivocally. please mask and please educate others on why they should mask to make the world safer for immune compromised people to participate in.
however: masking is not my policy focus and it shouldn't be yours, either. masking is a very good mitigation against droplet-born illnesses and a slightly less effective (but still very good) mitigation against airborne illnesses, but its place in the pyramid of mitigation demands is pretty low, for several reasons:
it's an individual mitigation, not a systemic one. the best mitigations to make public life more accessible affect everyone without distributing the majority of the effort among individuals (who may not be able to comply, may not have access to education on how to comply, or may be actively malicious).
it's a post-hoc mitigation, or to put it another way, it's a band-aid over the underlying problem. even if it was possible to enforce, universal masking still wouldn't address the underlying problem that it is dangerous for sick people and immune compromised people to be in the same public locations to begin with. this is a solvable problem! we have created the societal conditions for this problem!
here are my policy focuses:
upgraded air filtration and ventilation systems for all public buildings. appropriate ventilation should be just as bog-standard as appropriately clean running water. an indoor venue without a ventilation system capable of performing 5 complete air changes per hour should be like encountering a public restroom without any sinks or hand sanitizer stations whatsoever.
enforced paid sick leave for all employees until 3-5 days without symptoms. the vast majority of respiratory and food-borne illnesses circulate through industry sectors where employees come into work while experiencing symptoms. a taco bell worker should never be making food while experiencing strep throat symptoms, even without a strep diagnosis.
enforced virtual schooling options for sick students. the other vast majority of respiratory and food-borne illnesses circulate through schools. the proximity of so many kids and teenagers together indoors (with little to no proper ventilation and high levels of physical activity) means that if even one person comes to school sick, hundreds will be infected in the following few days. those students will most likely infect their parents as well. allowing students to complete all readings and coursework through sites like blackboard or compass while sick will cut down massively on disease transmission.
accessible testing for everyone. not just for COVID; if there's a test for any contagious illness capable of being performed outside of lab conditions, there should be a regulated option for performing that test at home (similar to COVID rapid tests). if a test can only be performed under lab conditions, there should be a government-subsidized program to provide free of charge testing to anyone who needs it, through urgent cares and pharmacies.
the last thing to note is that these things stack; upgraded ventilation systems in all public buildings mean that students and employees get sick less often to begin with, making it less burdensome for students and employees to be absent due to sickness, and making it more likely that sick individuals will choose to stay home themselves (since it's not so costly for them).
masking is great! keep masking! please use masking as a rhetorical "this is what we can do as individuals to make public life safer while we're pushing for drastic policy changes," and don't get complacent in either direction--don't assume that masking is all you need to do or an acceptable forever-solution, and equally, don't fall prey to thinking that pushing for policy change "makes up" for not masking in public. it's not a game with scores and sides; masking is a material thing you can do to help the individual people you interact with one by one, and policy changes are what's going to make the entirety of public life safer for all immune compromised people.
#dyspunktional#cripple punk#actually disabled#cripplepunk#a lot of these are major concessions for me personally as i'm an anarchist and loathe to support further concentrations of state power#but if you're gonna be operating within the structure of the system. here you go. handing you a cheat sheet for what you should demand.
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