#THERE'S NO MILGRAM I'M SO SAD

[noxtivagus]

my spotify-wrapped.. 🥹💀🤍

[seariii]

"If you kill a killer, the number of killers in the world stays the same"

Then I'll kill as many as I can

She already knows she's getting guilty. Her words on yonah might say one thing, but her heart and her mind know that she is now one of those murderers... she is no longer "clean of sin"

She is now stained, and one of those sinners she hates so much.

And she can barely deal with the guilt, that's why she continues to bottle it up, to eat so she doesn't burn out, because if she stops now... then what was it all for?

If I forgive her or not it doesn't matter, because she doesn't forgive herself

[red-moon-at-night]

Let's talk a little bit about Mahiru's boyfriend

This post is alternatively titled "Mahiru's Boyfriend Probably Had An Eating Disorder And I Am Very Sad About It So Now You Get To Be Sad About It With Me" but that felt a bit much in the bold title font so I'm trying to tone this down at least a little bit :')

So I was reading this wonderful post earlier (you should too btw it has a LOT of interesting information), and as I was going through the food section something clicked in my brain. Pieces of information that were drifting aimlessly before quickly came together for me and I almost wish they hadn’t because oh boy is it depressing.

Now, nothing I’m about to say here is explicitly stated - but I do think it is strongly insinuated, through the MVs of both ‘This Is How To Be In Love With You’ (TIHTBILWY what an acronym wow) and ‘I Love You’. I am aware that the latter video has a lot of metaphorical imagery, but I still think some of this imagery can be taken in a literal sense to reinforce ideas established in TIHTBILWY.

TW/Trigger Warnings: discussion of eating disorders (anorexia, bulimia, etc.), discussion of suicide and suicidal thoughts. Please take these into consideration and stay safe!

credit to iaobug’s transcribed images from ‘This Is How To Be In Love With You’ used below btw!

Now I’ve always had an inkling this could be possible, but I didn’t realise until recently there was this much evidence supporting a little idea of mine dancing around in my head.

But First, Some Quick Definitions and Criteria

First things first, I think we should briefly clarify what an eating disorder is and what eating disorder I think Mahiru’s boyfriend most likely had.

Here are some definitions:

Eating disorders are behavioral conditions characterized by severe and persistent disturbance in eating behaviors and associated distressing thoughts and emotions. They can be very serious conditions affecting physical, psychological and social function. (source)

An eating disorder is a mental health condition where you use the control of food to cope with feelings and other situations. (source)

And here are some brief introductions to several types of eating disorders:

The most common eating disorders are:

anorexia nervosa – trying to control your weight by not eating enough food, exercising too much, or doing both bulimia – losing control over how much you eat and then taking drastic action to not put on weight binge eating disorder (BED) – eating large portions of food until you feel uncomfortably full

Other specified feeding or eating disorder (OSFED) – A person may have an OSFED if their symptoms do not exactly fit the expected symptoms for any specific eating disorders.

(source)

Okay, so we have some basic information down, cool! This is not fully comprehensive but it will do for the purposes of this segment.

So what eating disorder do I believe Mahiru’s boyfriend had? 

I’m not sure! The information we have is not conclusive enough for me to confidently pick an option. What I will say is most likely, and most common, is OSFED and the concept of the eating disorder cycle. People’s symptoms will often overlap with multiple diagnoses, or shift from one mode of behaviour (e.g. the restrictive eating behaviours found in anorexia) to another (e.g. binge eating and following compensatory behaviours found in bulimia).

Things are often not as clear-cut or black and white as we’d like to imagine.

Let’s move onto looking at the MVs, shall we?

This first music video has a wealth of information hidden in its cute magazine-style annotations and imagery - information that, when you look a little closer and consider the bigger picture, raises all the alarm bells in my mind.

Parts of ‘This Is How To Be In Love With You’ That Make Me Pause In Concern, In Chronological Order:

The Bread

Let's start off with a not very obvious one.

One of the first things we learn about Mahiru’s soon-to-be-boyfriend (which by the way this is literally the 2nd time he’s mentioned) is ‘wow he buys a lot of bread’. Insignificant on its own, I know, but consider this through my lens if you will: my man has bought 5 whole baguettes from a bakery. Not 2 or 3, but 5. Actually, on closer inspection there's even more bread of a different type at the bottom of that bag too. These aren’t store-bought, they’re fresh and will probably go stale in a few days. Pray tell, if the man is not eating baguette for breakfast lunch and dinner over the course of 72 hours... why did he buy so much fucking bread?

What comes to mind when I see this is binge eating. Bread is one of the most common binge foods out there; anything with high carbohydrates or high fat content, in fact, often due to its “unhealthy” or “forbidden” nature.

We'll just have a quick look at Mahiru's comment again:

"I thought to buy the same bread he did, but this is far too much for me to eat... ><

I forgot to ask how many calories there are..."

If it hasn't been established by now with the MV's aesthetic, Mahiru cares about her appearance. A lot. Her self-image and beauty directly ties into looking 'good' enough for others, so she can find the love of her life and please him with her looks.

If Mahiru is also calorie counting, this does not bode well for their relationship. I should probably speak in past tense, actually... Mahiru's own self-image behaviours made her blind to her boyfriend's self-image behaviours. There we go.

But I'm getting ahead of myself here.

So, We have an indication of binge eating behaviours. Remind me again what comes after binging?

The Jogging Hobby

Oh, that’s right - purging.

Excessive exercise is an indirect method of purging/compensatory behaviour found in bulimia. A more commonly known purging method is self-induced vomiting, but that's certainly not the only way to counteract excess calories. 

So the jogging, while harmless in isolation, is starting to paint an ever-so-slightly worrying picture.

Again, let's take a look at Mahiru's comment:

"I had a chance to chat with him today, and he mentioned his hobby was jogging. ... I haven't exercised this much in ages... I'm totally exhausted..." 

The only hobby (not hobbies but hobby, singular) that we learn the boyfriend has is this. Sure, there's one movie that he also likes... but that's it. There's not much else to him! So when the two most prevalent ideas attached to this guy are 'food' (in excess) and 'exercise' (in excess)... you can see where I'm going with this.

And by the way, the post I linked at the very beginning? Well, they worked out the location of where this running loop is, and judging by Mahiru’s position and direction it would suggest she’s already jogged about 5km and beginning another loop. So we’re looking at a jog ranging from 5-10km (or more)...

The Alcohol

Okay, here's a quick pop quiz question for you. Who is more likely to get drunk on the same volume of alcohol: a 5"1 woman, or an average height (5"7 in Japan) man?

In theory, it should be the 5"7 man on the basis of his height and size. Alcohol tolerance goes up the bigger you are. 

So why is it that the boyfriend ended up blackout drunk, and Mahiru... didn't?

Let’s take a look at the comment:

“My first date at a bar, how heartpounding!

Here is where I learned he’s the biggest lightweight I’ve ever met! ...or maybe I’m just really good at holding alcohol?

Whatever the case, blackout drunk him is so cute!”

Three possible options:

Mahiru really can 'hold her liquor'. Judging by her sheltered home life and general lack of adult life experience though, I'm gonna press x to doubt here sorry mappi.

The boyfriend drunk more alcohol than Mahiru. Also unlikely, as she calls him a 'lightweight' and I think she would've highlighted this in her comment.

He drank on an empty stomach. Alcohol absorbs way faster if you haven't had anything to eat beforehand. This, I think is the most likely scenario.

Here's a little more on the subject that I found interesting:

You absorb 20 per cent of alcohol into your bloodstream through your stomach and the rest into your bloodstream through your small intestine.

Drinking a small amount of alcohol stimulates your appetite because it increases the flow of stomach juices. A large amount of alcohol dulls your appetite and can cause malnutrition. (source)

What have we learnt so far?

So we’ve established some concerning behaviours here.

He eats in excess

He exercises in excess

He drinks in excess (on an empty stomach)

I’m actually going to move onto material from the ‘I Love You’ MV, but intertwine it with some of the remaining points from TIHTBILWY. 

At this point the relationship has progressed, we’re moving into winter which brings with it the holiday season! Yay! Except not yay, because things are starting to look really bad for Mahiru’s boyfriend. We've gone from this:

To this:

The carousel was fine at first but now it’s taking its toll on him. Both of them have tattered clothes but Mahiru looks optimistic, whilst the boyfriend looks very distraught. His cheekbones are visible and overall he looks a lot less healthy. I guess this is a good time to point out how distinct and visible his collarbone has been this entire time by the way? He’s even bonier than before. Not great.

A lot of events occur at this time of year, such as Christmas (celebrated between couples in Japan as more of a lovers holiday) and new years. What happens a lot during that period of time? Food. Lots of it. This point in the year is not ideal for someone suffering from a worsening eating disorder. This is a period of time which someone would want to move very quickly from because they can’t see the end of it.

I think it’s time to read Mahiru’s comment from day 15:

“Happy new years! To celebrate, we went to a shrine.

Predictably, I already have my wish in mind.

May we stay like this until the end of time.

May nobody stand in my way”

She, on the other hand, is very happy for things to remain as they are.

Day 16 - AKA, Oh No Things Have Gone Terribly Wrong

This is where the narrative hits its climax and everything starts to snowball.

Now, we reach this scene where the boyfriend stops walking and breaks down. He kneels on the ground, digs his nails into it, and pleads for... something. Help? An intervention? A stop to this carousel that’s doing him no good and only making his health (physical and mental) worse?

He never speaks. It is a silent plea.

One that Mahiru misses.

Saying I love you but doing what I did, I know I have no right, crossed and covered in sin

My love, it scored an own goal, destroyed my love and me with its weight

Tell me, oh tell me why, can’t I just do it right

What did you do, Mahiru?

I believe that this scene and response:

Is directly parallel to this event:

As in, they’re the same thing. 

One more comment to read:

He’ll be in for a big, delicious surprise once he gets home!

I’ve made SO many notes about his favorite foods, and practiced my butt off!

I can’t wait to see the look on his face when he sees it all.

Her love - her surprise buffet to cheer him up - scored an own goal, so to speak.

I don’t think I need to say much about this picture, or this scene. She’s giving him excess but that excess is literally driving him over the edge. The nuance is lost between them, and they both need different things from each other and they’re not getting it. Cake to rats, rats to cake.

They’re back on the carousel, spinning around and around with things never changing, no end in sight.

I want to end on this frame of the MV. You see the pole behind the boyfriend? It’s reminding me of rope, and of a certain visual at the end of the video. The juxtaposition of Mahiru forcing her ‘love’ onto him, and of suicidal ideation being the only way off this ride and his problems.

[a-star-that-burns-brightly]

Okay so after reading a bunch of theories on Deep Cover and rewatching the MV about 30 times, my only coherrant thought is that I want Kotoko Yuzuriha to be fucking okay

[snakes-and-fluff]

What do you MEAN characters can just choose not to answer a question?? This hurts so much aaaaaaaah

I expected Amane's answers to bring me pain (and don't worry: they are), but some of Kazui's have just been a punch in the gut.

[civettictis]

does anyone know if the static at the end of the hallucination live was morse code or anything of that sort?

Frankly, i'm not cut out to sort that kind of thing myself. It just seemed awfully suspicious.

[linagram]

[ meet the prisoners! (t2 edition) ] prisoner 009: kuroki riku

OH GOD THIS BOY... THIS BOY. yeah, even though he got voted inno, riku is still. um. yeah he's going through it. he's happy with his verdict though.

(Warning: Riku's extremely self-destructive habits aren't described in detail here (it's more about why he does those things and not how he does them), but they are still mentioned and they're still a big part of his character)

General info.

T1 Verdict: Riku was voted innocent which is probably supposed to be a good thing.. except it's kinda not. Riku's ideas were affirmed, so he still thinks that his crime "wasn't even a crime" and his victim deserved it, but he also started treating other people a bit.. differently, possibly hinting at how exactly his crime went. Him telling Akio to "go and die" instead of just asking him to leave him alone is a good example. Perhaps now he thinks that it's a normal thing to do and that all people that he doesn't like deserve to die. Or maybe he's just really emotional and impulsive. Or maybe both. Also, if we're talking about Riku's ideas and thoughts.. It should be mentioned that you can not only change (or at least try to change) the prisoners' thoughts about their crimes, you can change their entire mindset. And so.. Not only Riku's thoughts about his crime were affirmed, but his thoughts about himself, his life and other people were as well. Which means, sadly, he thinks that he was forgiven not because the guards really do think he's innocent and they think his crime isn't that serious, but because of how he tried to make them feel sorry for him when he had cut himself. And now he thinks that it's the only way to make them forgive him and that they won't "feel his pain" if they won't be able to see it with their own eyes. It's like he sees his own pain as a "performance" of some kind and the guards as his "audience".. Or maybe he actually has a bigger audience to impress than he thinks? Well, if we want to talk about something that isn't as sad, he got a new outfit and a new dye job. He's used to dyeing his hair without any help, so he was able to do it himself. For some reason, he's not exactly satisfied with it though, so he will most likely change it later. When Miki asked him about it, he just laughed and said that it "reminds him of someone that he would rather forget".

T2 Personality: .. Listen, it was pretty much impossible to fix this guy between Trial 1 and Trial 2. So even though he got voted innocent, it's hard to say that he's more confident now, like Shun, or more calm, like Naomi. Yes, he absolutely thinks he was in the right, but.. at what cost? He has at least one mental breakdown every week and he has two broken guitars in his cell now. There are multiple reasons why Riku is acting like this now and one of them is that again, he genuinely thinks that the guards voted him innocent only because of what he did to himself. And he wants them to forgive him again, so he really wants them to understand just how much pain he had felt while being friends with his victim. You think he just wants them to feel sorry? You think he's just doing it for the attention?.. He doesn't really want to admit it, but it's kinda true. He doesn't think it's a bad thing though. Of course he wants attention. He literally lives for it. And if this is how he can make people look at him, then he's okay with bleeding to death in front of his audience. He doesn't want to.. you know, actually die, but if this is the only way he can make people notice him and feel the same emotions and pain that he's feeling, then he will do it. Just please, look at him. Don't leave him alone. Ah, speaking of that. Yeah, another reason why he's acting like this is that Riku is very lonely now. He's so used to being surrounded by friends and people who adore him and want to be like him or with him that he just can't accept the fact that he has like zero friends in this prison now.. Except one person, though their relationship is actually pretty hard to explain.

T2 Relationship dynamics:

Riku claims that what happened between him and Akio was completely Akio's fault and that he had "provoked" him to say what he ended up saying. Except when the guards asked him about what Akio told him, Riku refused to explain. Some other prisoners said that they only heard Akio begging Riku to tell him that everything will be fine and he still likes him. Riku says that there was more than that and that he really did have a reason to basically tell Akio to go and kill himself. Riku avoids Akio and if he sees him somewhere, he either immediately leaves or tries not to look at him and just ignores him. If Akio tries to talk to him, Riku says that he has to go and again, he just leaves. When Miki asked him if he feels sorry for Akio, he couldn't answer and just turned away from her.

Aimi and Riku are not even pretending to be friends anymore. Riku doesn't try to act nice and polite around her anymore and Aimi refuses to forgive him and if he even looks at Akio, she will leave with her new friend right after that. Riku is not really sad about it since, to be honest, he never really liked Aimi and was friendly with her only because he didn't want to ruin his reputation since most prisoners were nice to her (even if they also weren't sincere about it). He actually feels more free in a way just like he did after his crime even if that feeling didn't last long.

Riku and Miki's relationship is really complicated. Are they just a guard and a prisoner? Are they friends? Are they lovers? They don't know either. But there's definitely something going on between them. Riku is very attached to her and really wants her to give him more attention but since the girl is very busy with the prisoners' requests, everyone's verdicts, taking care of the prisoners and making sure nobody kills each other, it's not really possible. Asahi is also very protective of her and he doesn't want her to become closer with any of the prisoners, including Riku, so yeah, that kid doesn't let him spend time with her too. Miki is attracted to him, but it's hard to say if she really does want to be in a relationship with him. She really does want to protect him, but does she see him as someone who is actually very important to her or does she see him as another "poor thing that needs to be saved"? However, Riku does flirt with her sometimes and he even asked if she would be okay with dating him after (or if) they get out and Miki, without even thinking, said yes. She regrets it just a little bit now. Because of their relationship's strange nature, Riku doesn't use any honorifics when he talks about Miki anymore meanwhile Miki isn't sure how to refer to him anymore and sometimes she doesn't use any of them either, though she usually "corrects" herself. In his voice drama she refers to him as "Riku-san", using his first name instead of his last name, just like she did in his first VD.

Music info.

Milgram cover: Surprisingly, he gets Half. Totally not because I didn't know what else to give him. Maybe it could be like.. a very soft rock-like cover?? I don't know how to explain it. Oh, but if you're thinking that this song fits him because of his relationship with his friend.. Well, not exactly, because I actually see this cover as Riku pretending to feel sorry for his victim. Like, look at him, he's singing a sad song about his friend who died because of him, don't you want to forgive him? I can even imagine his cover sounding kinda fake, like, it would still sound very pretty, but you'd be able to tell that Riku doesn't actually feel anything and he doesn't actually care about his victim. Asahi's cover would be more emotional compared to Riku's.

DECO*27 cover: NOW THIS IS AN INTERESTING ONE. You see, there were two songs I had in mind for him and I was like "Okay, we'll use this one for T2 and this one for T3", but.. then I looked at his MV and his VD and realized that him getting the song I wanted to use for T2 wouldn't really make sense, because his MV and VD are more about his backstory, what kind of person he is and how exactly his crime went, but the song I chose was more about his relationship with his victim and his motive and I'm planning to show it in his T3 MV. And the T3 song was actually perfect for his T2 MV, even though I feel like it has more of a "Guilty" vibe, than "Innocent" one (which is also another reason why I wanted to keep the original T2 song at first).. So anyway, he gets Chimera! IT'S SO PERFECT FOR HIM I CAN'T. (And yes, his Chimera cover would sound VERY emotional compared to Half, like he would be basically on the same level as Aimi in her After Pain cover, which means lots of screaming)

Different Vocaloid producer cover: I really did have a song I wanted to use for him this season and I had one in mind since I even came up with his character, but.. then Better Off Worse by Circus-P came out. Yeah, I just had to keep that song for T3 instead. And yeah, I imagine this one as a rock cover too! NO BUT THE LYRICS FIT HIM SO WELL IT HURTS ("Making sure that I feel pain, getting in a bitter headspace", "You listen when it hurts too much to bear", "Overanalyze my broken heart as the tempo kicks up a notch", "Because I know my woes are a product to be consumed", "Bleed out for audience approval, tragic but perfectly on schedule, you think by now that we would have learned, behind every piece of art is a human to be heard") Like this song describes exactly how he's feeling right now.. And also, fun fact: Riku is one of the bilingual/multilingual characters along with Akio, Kei and a couple of others! Another fun (or not so) fact: I was actually thinking of assigning this song to Kei at first.

His T2 Trailer Voicelines:

"Good morning~ Hehe, Miki, you look as cute as ever. Ah, Eiji-san, you're here too. Do you two need something? Oh, you just came to tell me about the second trial? Interesting.. Well, I guess I'll just have to prove my innocence to you again. Hm? Why are you looking at me like that?.. Ah.. I'm fine. Please, don't worry about me."

"Oh no.. Looks like the whole school hates you now. I wonder why, you're such a nice person.. Why would they hate someone as kind as you? Can you show me what they posted about you?"

His T2 Song Trailer Voiceline:

"One word and I'll do it."

Trivia:

I think I remember mentioning that Riku's image color was actually supposed to be a dark shade of green at first but then I changed it to orange, so I wanted to use that as his second image color, but when I was working on his album cover.. um. I realized that it looks kinda bad, so I changed it to a much brighter shade of green instead.

His second T2 Trailer voiceline is actually supposed to sound a bit fake, like he still sounds like he really is sorry, but you can't help but feel like he's only pretending or even mocking the person he's talking to.

I think I've never mentioned this before and I'm not sure if that was easy to tell, but Riku's natural hair color is black, so in the first season he only had these colorful highlights (?) going on and nothing else. I actually remember that when I first came up with his character design, his natural hair color was supposed to be a very soft and pastel shade of pink and Riku was supposed to be embarrassed of it, but I changed it. Another random fact is that his little sisters also have black hair, but his older brother's natural hair color is light brown.

Yes, he wants to be voted innocent this time too. He really does believe he did nothing wrong and that his "sin" can't even be considered a sin.

This was stated in the "Personality" section, but this guy literally has no one to talk to except Miki. Literally no one. Pretty much everyone either ignores him, avoids him, finds him scary and too unstable or simply thinks he's annoying, which is sad to think about because 1) Riku's T2 version is closer to his "real" personality, which means that when he's not acting like a cheerful and sociable popular boy, people stop caring about him and 2) People either can't stop him when he starts hurting himself again or they just pretend not to see it or they genuinely don't care. Again, Miki is the only one who can stop him when that happens and can calm him down.

I'm trying my best not to spoil anything, but if you want to try and guess how exactly Riku's MV is going to look like and what's gonna happen there, read his song preview lyrics again and try to, like.. Think about them more. The weirdest idea that comes to your mind is probably the correct one.

He's another character that gets a VD that actually shows him as someone who probably should be forgiven, but his MV shows him as someone who's more guilty and has this.. really creepy and weird atmosphere (in my opinion) going on.

[angeltism]

talking about house md with alfred is so funny bc i really just Forget certain things happened despite how utterly ridiculous they are

[waiting-on-a-dream]

𝙼𝙱𝚃𝙸, 𝚎𝚗𝚗𝚎𝚊𝚐𝚛𝚊𝚖 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎 𝚕𝚊𝚗𝚐𝚞𝚊𝚐𝚎𝚜 𝚘𝚏 𝚖𝚢 𝙼𝚒𝚕𝚐𝚛𝚊𝚖 𝚘𝚌𝚜!

𝙼𝙱𝚃𝙸

Ichiro: INTP (He's curious about the world, despite getting stuck in his own head and losing track of time often. He gets many ideas but forgets them just as easily. He doesn't care much for what people think about him, but goes along with the flow so nobody will be unhappy (he probably doesn't care about the topic either but that's besides the point). He's also really detached from his own emotions, and finds it hard to empathize with other people.)

Akane: ESFP (She's really focused on her surroundings and is often experiencing everything that's happening around her, never missing a single detail unlike Ichiro. She also has a good grasp of her emotions and has a strong moral code, hence why she's often so angry with other people who look away. However, knowing that she's angry doesn't help control her emotions that well. She doesn't like being a bad mood, but she doesn't know how to manage her feelings properly.)

Daisuke: ESTP (Like Akane, he also pays attention to his surroundings well. He's always up and about, flitting from one exciting activity to the next. He also likes to think about things in a logical way and doesn't care about the morality of what he's doing as much (his job, cough). However, he has FE as his third function, so he's not completely terrible at navigating social and emotional situations. In fact, he's quite good at utilizing his emotional manipulation.)

Suzume: INFJ (She has a bad habit of always having her head in the clouds and worrying about the future. She mostly gets by with life through her intuitive gut feeling, which hasn't failed her so far. She also wants everyone to get along and will sacrifice her thoughts and feelings in order to go with the majority, to the point where she might put on a mask for someone if they want her to act a certain way.)

Haku: ISTJ (He tends to relate his past experiences to present circumstances, where his memories are used as a frame of reference to build ideas about how the world is and how it works. Whatever has been established to work well, he'll keep going with that until another solution is required. He's reasonable and rational, but has enough emotional intelligence not to rub most people off the wrong way.)

Yui: ESFJ (Her decisions and opinions are heavily influenced by her interactions with other people, as well as cultural and societal norms. She's friendly, sensitive and empathetic, always willing to help other people whenever she can. She also tends to act and respond in patterned ways that have been proven to work in the past, not willing to step out of her comfort zone most of the time.)

Rin: ISFP (He's sensitive and very aware of his inner emotional state, having a bad habit of being self-centered and aloof often. He only does what seems right to him, and doesn't enjoy being told that he's "wrong". Like most teenagers, he's trying to form his own identity while still gaining approval from his peers (its hard to do both). He also pays a lot of attention to his surroundings, concentrating on living in the moment instead of planning ahead.)

Noa: INFP (She's sensitive and empathetic, unfortunately jaded and anxious from bad experiences in her past. She used to be an idealistic dreamer when she was younger, but she knows now that she was just naïve and unaware of the world. She's also speculative and creative. Her NE allows her to see patterns everywhere, jumping from one thought to another as each item reminds her of something else.)

Kiyoshi: ENFJ (Like Yui, he's friendly and helpful to everyone he meets. He feels a sense of responsibility over people in a humanitarian way, and often sacrifices his own thoughts and feelings to keep up the peace in a group setting. He makes sure to plan ahead in life, but ends up relying on his instincts to guide him more often than not. Its okay, his gut instincts rarely fail him!)

Mayumi: INTJ (She worries a lot about many things, always stuck in that chaotic head of hers. Even though she thinks so much, she finds it very hard to voice her thoughts in a way that others will understand. How frustrating. She might be anxious often, that doesn't necessarily make her an emotional wreck though. She's actually quite level-headed when the situation calls for it, making reasonable and rational judgements every time without fail.)

Haruto: ENTP (He has a speculative and creative intellect, seeing patterns and connections everywhere to make a bigger picture. Whether or not he chooses to share his vision is another thing. He also prefers to think about things objectively and logically, questioning many things he comes across. Like Daisuke, he's also perfectly capable of tapping into his emotional intelligence.)

𝙴𝚗𝚗𝚎𝚊𝚐𝚛𝚊𝚖

Ichiro: 5w6 (sp/sx)

His self-preservation instinct manifests in his tendency of retreating into his head to think, hence why he's so detached from reality. He's hesitant to do something if he isn't sure how it'll go, leading him to observe life from a distance instead of participating in it. His six wing causes him to feel alone and incapable without outside support, and he wants to feel safe with the people that he trusts. But he's primarily a type 5, so despite wanting attention from the people that he likes, he ends up minimizing his needs to avoid having them think he's too needy.

His social instinct comes in second because of his natural curiosity towards the world, wanting to learn more despite being so detached from it. He also finds comfort in knowing the acceptable boundaries of how to act through "authority figures" such as: his mom, Haruto and the other adults in Milgram. Because they're supposed to know more than him, he automatically trusts most authority figures and what they tell him.

Akane: 6w5 (sx/sp)

Her sexual instincts manifest in her tendency to appear bold and fierce in order to protect herself from any threats. Sexual sixes have the mentality of "the best defense is a good offense", and Akane is no exception. Her constant anger isn't a façade per say, but it stems mostly from her fear of getting or being allowed to get hurt. She would also like to have someone to rely on, but that isn't her main priority. Her sexual 5 tendencies manifest in her distrust of people instead, constantly analyzing and testing them to find out if they're any threat to her. Her guard is always up.

She doesn't trust any authority around her (they've all failed her so far), but she can't help the small feeling of hope that they'll help her every time. They're the authorities, so they should care about her and want to help, right? Right? She also doesn't pay much attention to anyone she doesn't like, as they tend to make her angry and that isn't good for anyone. If someone can connect with her and/or hold a conversation with her without pissing her off though, she's surprisingly loyal once she gets attached.

Daisuke: 7w6 (sp/so)

His self-preservation instinct manifests in his characteristics of being practical, opportunistic, and good at networking. He likes the sense of banding together with trusted others in which he knows he'll be looked after. Its funny. He fears being completely reliant on others, yet wants to be able to rely on someone. His six wing further emphasizes his need for support. His morals are questionable, but he still seeks friendly connections and alliances. And to do this he projects a friendly, trustworthy, and supportive persona as good allies are supposed to be.

Daisuke imagines having something better than his bleak reality sometimes, but only sometimes. He's not enough of a dreamer to be so idealistic. He has a flair for being dramatic, and exaggerates good effects when trying to rope in clients, but that's about it. His romantic side likes to sneak out in the presence of a certain someone though. He isn't as aggressive as Akane (sexual 6 wing), but he does tend to feign calmness in the face of "danger". He's good at not showing it, but he's actually quite scared most of the time.

Suzume: 9w8 (so/sx)

Her social instinct manifests in her tendency to work hard to support the people she cares for and prioritize the group’s needs above her own. This is due to the feeling that she doesn't actually belong among the people she cares for, so she overcompensates by being generous and sacrificing whatever is necessary to meet the needs of the group in order for a sense of belonging. She is also very focused on protecting her loved ones but has a hard time expressing vulnerability and emotions. 

Its hard to live in such a harsh and cruel world, but she is able to find a sense of comfort through the satisfaction of physical needs. Enjoyable activities like eating, reading, watching television, and even sleeping get her from one day to the next. As long as she focuses on the present instead of the daunting future, she'll be fine. Her 8 wing allows her to be good at making things happen. When she wants something, she most certainly will work hard to get it! She just needs to actually want something first.

Haku: 5w4 (sp/so)

Like Ichiro, he tends to keep to himself and learn about the world through observing rather than participating. While Ichiro has garnered a love for drawing, he has a passion for music, specifically piano. His 4 wing is where he differs from Ichiro's enneagram type. A type 4's greatest sin is "envy", and Haku tends to compare himself to others in terms of music capability. He actually isn't that talented when it comes to playing the piano, but he makes up for it through hard work. Still, he can't help being jealous of others who seem to get by without having to suffer as much as him. There's no point in whining about it though, so he learns to endure everything with a stoic face.

Sexual fives live for a kind of ideal connection, always searching for someone who they can trust with all their secrets. They can be said to be romantics in that way. Luckily for Haku, he already has his beloved brother who is always by his side. Everyone else in the world pales in comparison to him. The sexual side of Haku's 4 wing manifests in his competitive streak towards his peers. When it comes to the piano, he hates to lose to anyone else. Even though he isn't as naturally talented as everyone else, its what he's best at. Its an important part of him, and he can't let go of it.

Yui: 4w3 (so/sp)

As a social 4, she tends to feel things deeply and finds it hard to regulate her negative emotions. A part of her wants her suffering to be recognized and understood, but she also fears displaying such vulnerability to the potential of being rejected. To compensate for this innate sadness, she projects the exact opposite image. She's flourishing and beautiful and popular, liked by everyone. Her smile will surely outshine her shadow.

She also often feels competitive towards other idols in the industry, especially those that seem to be better than her. She can't stand the thought of being forgotten in someone else's shadow, so she works hard to shine in her own right. Its not always about her though! She likes to see her loved ones flourish as well, and will often work hard in support of the people she cares for. There's a special kind of pride she feels when her loved ones are acknowledged after improving with her help.

Rin: 1w2 (so/sp)

As a social 1, he is highly idealistic and driven by an internal sense of morality. He strictly believes in rules and responsibility, hence why he takes pinky promises so seriously. He can be nitpicky and stubborn, causing him to feel separate from his peers because he struggles to find someone he can totally relate to. Even though he finds most people annoying, he quickly grows attached to anyone who treats him nicely. He's a hard worker with the occasional competitive streak, wanting to stand out and make an impact within whatever group he's joined (his school's science club).

He often feels that he knows the “right” way to do things, and will get frustrated at those who don't follow his views. Its not that he believes in perfection, but there's a certain standard that everyone should live up to. He can't understand people who fuss over trivial things that don't amount to anything in the end. Once someone manages to befriend him, he'll give lots of attention to them, wanting to be their best friend just as they are his. He gets lonely quite often actually, and isn't good at letting go of people.

Noa: 4w5 (so/sx)

Similar to Yui, she's sensitive and has a bleak outlook on life and the world as a whole. Its as if she was born to be sad, and she can't help but feel as if life isn't worth living most of the time. She tries not to burden others with her depressing thoughts and feelings, but it feels good to let the weight off her back once in a while. A part of her fears that her loved ones will start seeing her differently once she shares too much though. These feelings might be born from her tendency to live in her own head, filled with romantic ideals of a better world with better people. She was never one for mundane, ordinary life, how could she be? The books and movies she watches are much more interesting, and they often make her wish she was living in another world instead.

Her self-preservation instinct tries its best to make her not seem like an utter failure. Others will surely be annoyed at her whining, so she should just keep these messy feelings to herself. This inner conflict only causes her turmoil most of the time. Her 5 wing also causes her to have a need for clearly defined boundaries, to have a place of safety she can retreat to to avoid feeling lost in the world. Even though she wants to, its hard to voice her thoughts sometimes. Especially with the potential of rejection.

Kiyoshi: 2w3 (so/sp)

He's obviously a social 2 with him being the helpful and responsible leader type. He wants to help people and preserve the peace of the community, and is ambitious in pursuing any goals he sets for himself. Everyone who knows him admires him for his accomplishments, he's a role model for his community after all. A part of him needs everybody's admiration and respect as a way of earning a sense of belonging in his community. His parents are very active in the community as well, so he's learned that people who go out of their way to help others are always well loved and accepted. He makes sure to live up to everyone's expectations.

He also strives to forge intimate connections with others. It'd be nice to have some close friends, to share secrets with others and to be shared with. But he wants to be approved of and liked so much that he is willing to agree to anything someone says. He doesn't even realize that he says whatever the other wants to hear until hours after the conversation. Because he tries so hard to be good and perfect, he doesn't know how to react to criticism. He also goes out of his way to support others, particularly his loved ones. He wants everyone to get their own chance to shine!

Mayumi: 1w9 (so/sx)

Similar to Rin, she believes that everyone has a certain standard to love up to and responsibilities that they must fulfill. She strives to be the perfect example to others by living according to the rules and portraying correct conduct. She has a strong moral compass and bad habit of judging others in secret (she tries not to). However, she's more peaceful and compromising compared to Rin, as she doesn't want to offend or cause trouble for anyone. She works selflessly for the group without desire to be in the spotlight or be heaped with praise, simply being part of a meaningful group of people means the most to her.

Her self-preservation instinct manifests in her tendency to be plagued by worry in her daily life. She wants to be prepared when things go wrong, and will put in a lot effort into making sure her life is in order. Despite her anxiety and annoyance whenever things don't go smoothly, she still strives to live a calm and peaceful life. This means that she is practical and routine-oriented, trying her best to focus on the present and find ways to make her environment more enjoyable and comfortable.

Haruto: 8w7 (sp/so)

He doesn't have to worry about such things as a prison warden in Milgram, but he actually has a strong need to obtain what he needs for survival. He has a sort of ruthlessness in going after what he wants and finding ways to get around people who might stand in his way. He's efficient and calculating, but not entirely cold-hearted. His 7 wing also helps him with being opportunistic and good at networking, qualities that are always good to have for survival. He believes in strength in numbers, so being friendly and forming alliances with others is important to him. Even more so when he comes across someone who can help him in achieving his goals. Perhaps he struggled a lot before Milgram.

His sexual instinct has him being distrustful of rules and not afraid to go against the grain of convention. He's found himself in a strange place with no memory of anything before, so he's always uneasy despite being in the "highest position of authority" in Milgram. He wants to be in control of himself and his environment, and gaining more information is the only way to do so at the moment. His optimistic 7 wing keeps him in good spirits despite his uneasiness, and he tends to be impulsive because of it, much to the chagrin of some prisoners. Planning, improvising, envisioning – these are the things that occupy his time.

𝙻𝚘𝚟𝚎 𝚕𝚊𝚗𝚐𝚞𝚊𝚐𝚎𝚜

Ichiro

Gender preference: None. He'd probably grow feelings for anyone within his age range that treats him nicely.

Giving:

Gift giving - Its a nice way to show his affection without coming off as too clingy. He tends to dedicate and give his drawings to the people close to him. Drawing is his hobby, and he's quite good at it so he thinks his drawings are a good gift for his loved ones. He'll also pick up anything that he thinks his loved ones would like. Flowers, keychains, food, smooth pebbles for paperweights (that he paints first), you name it.

Quality time - When he likes someone, he wants to spend time with them (isn't it like that for everyone?). He'll try his best to pay attention when they're talking or trying to show him something. Compared to the way he usually ignores other people, his preference for someone can be quite obvious over time.

Receiving:

Quality time - As long as he can be doing the same activity as his loved one, he's happy (like a cat). The amount of attention they're willing to give him is how he measures their feelings towards him actually. If they don't want to spend time with him, that must mean that they don't care about him.

Words of affirmation - He has mommy issues, so of course he wants to be called a good boy. But seriously, compliments and kind words will have him curling into a ball of happiness. He doesn't believe in lies, so he thinks that any words of affection towards him is true. He likes being reminded that he's loved.

Akane

Gender preference: None. She's giving pansexual vibes actually.

Giving:

Acts of service - She's used to doing all the chores around the house, so doing the same thing for someone she actually cares about shouldn't be a problem. She isn't very good at cooking, but she'll practice if she wants to impress someone- He first-aid skills are quite good from experience, so she'll insist on patching up the wounds of her loved ones whenever she has the chance. She's not happy about them getting hurt or anything like that! She just likes having the opportunity to show her care for them.

Quality time - She's never had someone genuinely care about her before, but he wishes she had someone to talk to often. She's very picky about who she spends her time with, but when he likes someone, she'll go out of her way to seek them out. Who would've thought? Even a tsundere like her wants love.

Receiving:

Gift giving - Her father is a good-for-nothing, and a high school girl is only able to rake in so much income, so she doesn't have much to herself. Practical items like food, bandages, clothes and stationary are the fastest way to her heart. She'll find a way to repay the giver because she doesn't like feeling indebted to people, but she appreciates the gesture all the same.

Words of affirmation - She is so weak to compliments. Butter her up a little and she'll be a flustered blushing mess. Its nice hearing her loved ones tell her that she's pretty cool, okay? Especially after the things her father and teachers have said to her.

Daisuke

Gender preference: None. Bisexual disaster at his finest.

Giving:

Physical touch - He's a touchy guy, even towards people he just met as long as they don't seem to mind (most of the time). If he likes someone, he'll definitely be draping himself over them a lot like a sloth. If he likes someone, he'll be thinking of kissing them so much its embarrassing. Even he gets embarrassed about it.

Gift giving - A part of him gives gifts in hopes that the receiver will think of him whenever they look at or use the gift, like a little reminder of his affection for them. But for the most part, he has money and he likes spending it on the people he cares for.

Receiving:

Quality time - His parents were often busy, so he was quite lonely in his childhood. Its easy to arrange for meetups with friends now that he's an adult, so that's exactly what he does. He'll do the same for anyone he has feelings for too. He doesn't call it a date, the potential of rejection is too much. He just wants to spend time with the people that he likes, preferably doing something fun.

Physical touch - Is he touch starved? Any skin contact makes him happy actually, even if its a little rough. Maybe he's just a masochist. Cuddling is his favourite, especially with his special someone playing with his hair. Not that he's ever had a special someone cuddle him... But its nice to dream about.

Suzume

Gender preference: None. I'm getting bisexual vibes from her too.

Giving:

Acts of service - Her main method of showing her love is easy to overlook, hence why she feels she isn't good at loving. Doing the chores, remembering important things for her loved ones, positioning things around the house for convenience... Even though it feels like she's being taken for granted sometimes, its her way of showing her love and she isn't stopping anytime soon.

Quality time - When she cares about someone, she gives them her full attention and tries her best to remember the important details about them. She'll only remember the times she spent with them in the end after all, so why not create as many happy memories with her loved ones as possible?

Receiving:

Quality time - She's really happy when her loved ones talk to her or do an activity with her. Watching a movie together is one of her favourite activities to do her loved ones actually. She gets to enjoy the movie with them, and then discuss it with them afterwards.

Words of affirmation - She's the type of person to hear "I love you" a thousand times over and still not get tired of it. Same goes for compliments and reassurances. She just has to hear it with her own ears even if they're lies and she'll be alright.

Haku

Gender preference: None. He isn't interested in dating, but he probably has the capacity to be attracted to people.

Giving:

Acts of service - His way of showing love is quiet. He's already a responsible older brother, so doing chores and offering massages to his parents is normal for him to do. Helping his brother talk to others is a loving act of service as well. His parents tell him he coddles his brother too much, but he can't help it.

Gift giving - He tends to buy snacks, flowers and little trinkets for his loved ones like a cat bringing its spoils to its master. Whatever he thinks they'd like. Learning to play piano songs that they like seems to be a gift rather than an act of service, so I'll put it here. He also leaves the portion of his meals that his brother likes for the other to eat, another example of him spoiling his brother too much.

Receiving:

Quality time - He just likes being around his loved ones. He could be in the same room as them, doing separate things, and he'd still consider it quality time. Of course its more special when they're doing an activity together though. He especially loves the music related activities, it feels more meaningful to him.

Physical touch - His family members are quite touchy actually. His dad pats his head frequently, his mom often squishes his cheeks, and his brother is always clinging to him. Since physical touch is their giving love language, he's likely adapted to receive it. He's quite picky with who touches him though.

Yui

Gender preference: Male. She thinks girls are cute, but isn't interested in dating them?

Giving:

Words of affirmation - She can't help but want to blurt out all the nice things she can think of about her loved ones. When someone mentions them, she automatically goes on a spiel about how amazing they are. She has to stop herself from ranting for too long most of the time. Shell praise compliment her loved ones face-to-face plenty too. And she means every word.

Physical touch - its hard to hide when she's feeling clingy. She loves hugging her loved ones, throwing an arm over their shoulders and tucking her chin onto the crook of their necks. She especially loves playing with their hair, no matter the length.

Receiving:

Quality time - Having her loved ones want to spend time with her is a surefire way to cheer her up during a bad day because she finds their presence comforting. She just needs them to sit with her. It lets her know that they don't find her annoying? Its a silly thought, she tries to shit it down every time it pops up.

Words of affirmation - Receiving compliments always improves her self-esteem. When she's feeling down, a few compliments is sure to get her mood back to normal in no time. She turns into a flustered mess when showered in kind words too.

Rin

Gender preference: Female

Giving:

Gift giving - He likes to treat his loved ones to snacks and buy little gifts for them. He doesn't receive that much pocket money, but he still insists on buying things for his loved ones because it makes him happy to see them happy with their gifts. He looks forward to special occasions like Mother's day and Valentine's day to be used as excuses to buy gifts for his loved ones.

Quality time - He likes seeing and interacting with the people that he likes! He can actually get antsy and restless when he hasn't been able to interact with his loved one(s) for too long. Like that time his parents went on a week-long trip for their anniversary. He was fidgeting while waiting for them at the airport.

Receiving:

Quality time - He tends to measure how much his loved ones love him based on how much time they spend with him. And he has a bad habit of taking it personally when they're too busy to spend time with him. It isn't that hard to hang out with him though. Most of the time he just wants to share a meal or read together.

Acts of service - He can sometimes forget to take care of himself when he's engrossed in his work, so its really nice when his loved one runs him a hot bath or brings him a snack while he's working. Little acts like that never fail to make his heart melt.

Noa

Gender preference: Male

Giving:

Physical touch - She can't help but want to feel her loved ones with her hands. Ruffling her brothers' hair, holding her mother's hand, hugging her beloved husband. There's something comforting about being able to feel their skin against hers. It grounds her, reminds her that they're here and alive. Is that weird?

Quality time - She isn't very busy, so she has plenty of time to spend on her loved ones. If her loved ones have something to show her, she's sure to give them her full attention! Any time spend sharing love for each other is quality time for her.

Receiving:

Words of affirmation -She tends to feel down sometimes, but little words of support and reassurance always help to pick her back up. Sometimes she just wants to be distracted and will ask them to ramble about something instead. She finds her loved ones' voices soothing, so they serve as good distractions.

Quality time - Since she likes spending time with her loved ones, she feels loved when they want to spend time with her too. She feels rather honored when her loved ones share something special to them with her actually. That means they trust her enough to share something close to them. How wonderful.

Kiyoshi

Gender preference: Female

Giving:

Acts of service - He wants his loved ones to be safe and comfortable at all times, so if there's anything he can do for them, he'll do his best to help them. Especially his beloved parents. He's a reliable assistant for his father while working, and frequently brews relaxing teas for his mother.

Gift giving - He likes to buy fancy and expensive gifts for his loved one on special occasion. Watches, fruit baskets, decorative items they're sure to like. His mother has a fondness for flowers, so he makes sure to buy a bouquet every Mother's day. He just loves seeing the look of joy on his loved ones' faces when they receive something they like. He can't get enough of it.

Receiving:

Physical touch - He's used to being touched a lot as a kid. His parents hugged him often, and his elderly neighbours liked to pinch his cheeks. They still do it even though he's all grown up now. Not that he's complaining! He quite likes the attention.

Acts of service - He's always making sure everyone else is taken care of, so who will take care of him? Sometimes he gets so engrossed on his work that he forgets about his own needs. Just having his loved one check in on him gives him enough motivation to keep going (and remind him to eat something).

Mayumi

Gender preference: Male

Giving:

Acts of service - She's more of a practical person, so she'd rather do something useful for her loved ones rather then profess her care with words. For her, talk is cheap. So she doesn't mind doing extra chores and cooking meals and such.

Gift giving - Another practical way of showing love that Mayumi prefers. She's known to knit sweaters for the children living in the hospital she works at, and her mother is always happy to receive more cooking equipment. Basically, she prefers to get things for the people she cares about that they will use.

Receiving:

Quality time - She's busy with her job as a nurse, so she treasures the precious moments spent with her loved ones. Even time spent doing chores with her mother is treasured by her. But she prefers activities like having a conversation over a shared meal.

Acts of service - She's very tired at the end of every day, so it'd be nice to be taken care of for a while. A simple cup of tea is enough to get her spirits up most of the time. She also tends to misplace her things quite often, so having someone help her to look for it and bring it to her would be really helpful.

Haruto

Gender preference: Both, both are good.

Giving:

Acts of service - He has traces of responsibility in him (likely from his past) and is always helping the people he care about feel comfortable. He's the kind of person that always has to be doing something, and that translates to his love language as well.

Words of affirmation - He tends to casually compliment the people he cares about, usually with a lighthearted tone. It just slips out so easily for him, he hardly has to think about it. The ever meaningful "I love yous" are saved for special occasions though.

Receiving:

Words of affirmation - Compliments and praises make him so happy! They inflate his ego too but we don't talk about that. If someone likes him, they must think he's pretty cool and want to voice it, right? He knows lots of people don't operate like that, but he wants to hear proof of their love from their lips. At least once in a while. That shouldn't be too hard for them if they love him.

Acts of service - Its nice to have things done for him. Even better if his loved ones is proactive about it! He's sure to do the same for them, so its only fair. The little things like being brought a drink and having his hair dried really makes his day!

[astrxealis]

sorry for rambling so much about milgram btw my thoughts are often a mess and i think too much about it but i am good now i think <3

[hectorthedoggo]

I will put this in ao3 and edit when i have the means to. but. @kani-miso it's 0009 sibs i thought of you and decided to make this 🎀🎀

UPDATE I ACIDENTALLY DELETED THE TAB WITH MY EDITS AO3 is going to kill me

“Alright. Milgram's up.” The creature stayed. Es stayed frozen from where they were sitting on the couch. Oh God. What's the consequences of my verdicts?

Wait. Up? This is Trial 2?

They disregarded that. It must be a mistake.

If these verdicts even are mine, I can’t tell. I've been dreading this. I'm scared. They clutched their arms, trying to gain some warmth, some friction, for what was to happen next.

Jackalope narrowed his eyes at them. “A nervous one, aren't you now. Anyways, so since the administrators decided that you were too unstable, you'll go free. Congrats.

Oh yeah, and the verdicts didn't really have consequences, it was just a little social experiment. It doesn't matter. Good luck surviving in the real world!”

What. What the heck is he talking about? “Wha- What do you mean- Who's the admin- wah!”

They felt a pulling sensation, and suddenly, they were standing in a Walmart™ parking lot. The only other person nearby was Mikoto Kayano.

But, nobody was dead. He was in his original clothes, but. Wait, where are we? What's this big sign that says ‘Walmart’?

What is a Walmart, and where the hell did Milgram go?

They also had a little pack with them, and upon opening it, there was a little message printed out. Nothing else.

‘mikoto is your legal sibling btw. gl lmao be glad I even gave you this note ur probably my favorite warden - Jackalope (professional child neglecter)’

At least the pack looked cool looked cool…

Es was about to have a mental breakdown. Why did Milgram leave me like this? Is this what I am to them?

“Woah, what happened?” Mikoto wondered, “Hey, Es. Did you do this? Is Milgram over? Did they identify it to be a mistake?”

They started shaking. They threw me out like garbage. I…

“Es?”

They sniffled at the situation. I’m… garbage. Because, as my usual logic says, I am what Milgram deems me to be.

“I- I have no idea…” they extended the last vowel to emphasize how little idea they had.

They threw the note on the ground --- or at least tried to, it just flew away, right into Mikoto’s hands ---, and started to sob.

The tables had turned. Mikoto looked like he knew why he was here, Es didn’t (nande boku ga koko ni iruyo). It was genetic.

Meanwhile, Mikoto had gotten the note, and he read it. “Wh- huh?”

He stared over at Es. “Es, this is a mistake, right?”

“That is the least of my worries right now, pudding boy!” they snapped at him, instead channeling their sadness into aggression.

He completely disregarded their feelings, to the point where he might not have even heard them. “Right… my mom did mention that our father got remarried. Wah, Suu! You’re my little sib!”

He went up to their grieving form, and gave them a little fistbump, lifting up their unwilling arm to do so. Why did he do that? Last time we touched, John was beating the shit out of me.

A random car pulled up into the Walmart™ parking lot, and the window unrolled. 

It was a woman with brownish hair, who looked like Mikoto. “Oh, you’re the other sibling that your father was talking about. You two can just get in the back in the car, your sister’s taking shotgun. Nice to meet you!”

Why the fuck does Mikoto’s sister have a shotgun? Are they all like this?

Mikoto followed in with them, and buckled in. Es had no idea what was going on.

They could not find the seatbelt, too busy processing the upheaval of their life in the past 5 minutes.

“Yo, sib. The seatbelt’s over there.” Mikoto smiled and gave a thumbs up, like a reliable older brother. “I saw it.” I did not see it.

They touched it, and got stung by the heat. Their, wait, no, Mikoto’s sister turned back at their sound of pain, turning off her phone. “Ah, yeah. It’s summer, don’t touch it.”

They scowled, forgetting their dread in the face of the overheated car seatbelt.

The car chimed, and the keys jingled. “Alright, folks! You two seem pretty tired from wherever the heck you disappeared to. Would you wanna go home, or get some ice cream?”

The sister turned around, and smiled a little wide. “My dear siblings, do you know the answer? There is a correct one.”

Es scowled. “What the fuck is an ice cream. Why is the cream ice?”

“Are you serious?” She scrutinized their face, finding the truth, “Step on it, Ma.” She went back to her phone, probably texting her friends about this weird kid in a warden outfit that was apparently her sibling now.

Mikoto looked over at Es and shrugged, like a comical cartoon character. Like a ‘what can you do?’.

I won’t allow these insolent- wait, these aren’t prisoners. Unless the sister girl did something with that shotgun of hers. It would run in the family, I guess.

Wait, that would mean that I’m also violent. Nevermind.

The 11th cell came to mind, and they dismissed it. Wrong kinda fic, buddy. We staying fluff here.

“So, Mikoto. And, what’s your name?”

“Es. I think?”

The woman put on her strict mother voice. “... okay. Mikoto and Es. What was so important that you had to completely disappear for like a years. No note! Job gone! You could’ve died, for all I knew! Es, sweetie, I’m sure it was Mikoto’s fault. He’s such a bad influence.”

Es raised their hand to ask a question, slightly flustered from the pet name. She indicated that they could speak.

They decided to just reveal it all. “Um, Mikoto committed murder… eh, Mikoto, he has DID and was stressed from his job, hence the murder. And I was the warden of the prison that held him and 9 others.”

Mikoto lost all of his composure at all of his darkest secrets being revealed, the dramatic guy he was. “What… Es, don’t… I… that’s not… I don’t have DID? I was doing… I was doing just…”

He seemed a little overwhelmed at the prospect of having to unpack all of the luggage that Es laid out, so another guy came out. “I am not straight. Oh- sorry, hi, I’m John. I’m the guy who totally committed the murder 100% trust guys c’mon vote mikoto innocent 2024-”

I already had to deal with that yapping last interrogation. Es shut him up with their hand. He waved it away. “If you’re gonna say that shit about Mikoto, Es hasn’t been going to bed at a healthy time or eating healthy.”

They were betrayed at his reveal. “I can’t believe you.”

“We’re going to fix that, Es. You’re going to get the regular kid treatment.” The mother nodded, eyes steeling. Oh no, not the normal teen treatment!

John had some other stuff going on behind there. Maybe Mikoto’s cheesiness had rubbed off on him. “As soon as we get out of this car I’m giving you a hug.”

“Is that a threat?”

“Yes.”

Speaking of unwarranted physical contact. “Oh yeah, mo- Mikoto’s mother, um… John beat me up in Trial 1.”

“SNITCH?!”

“What’cha gonna do about it?”

“Give you another hug.” He deviously grinned, knowing that wasn’t the answer they expected or an answer they liked.

“I won’t allow it.” But, they weren’t the warden anymore. They couldn’t deflect affection as well as they used to.

The sister was unbothered by this discourse. Perhaps it hasn’t quite set in. “I guess I got two extra surprise siblings. Cool.”

-

When they got to the ice cream store after a prolonged amount of awkward silence, the moment the car doors opened, the chase was on.

Es nearly ran into oncoming traffic to escape any chance at being loved, as one does, but John grabbed them and lifted them up by their elbows, giving them a hug once they were out of the street.

“Jeez, you’re light. C’mon, we’re getting ice cream and you aren’t gonna kill yourself.”

“‘M not!” They kicked their legs to try and get the man off of them. But, they had about the strength of a 5 week old kitten compared to him, without the claws.

He plopped them down, Es seething about their lack of power they had here.

The sister turned off her phone, finally, and turned to Es. “Okay, I just wanna make sure. Were you joking earlier about not having ice cream before?”

“I’m the prison warden of Milgram, I don’t need-”

She interrupted them before they could start monologuing and crying about how Milgram didn’t exist anymore. “You’re getting Birthday Bash.”

“What- but it’s not my birthday?” It could be, for all I know, but she’s doesn’t have to know that.

“Ok, what is your birthday?” Dammit.

“Great question!” Es stared into space, tone full of sarcasm. Milgram never tells me shit.

“Mikoto or whoever the hell you are, do you know their birthday?”

“Nah.” John responded. “By the way, um, this kid was the one who named me John, because they thought it would be funny to be a know-it-all and reference some English name.”

She looked over at Es. “No offense, but you suck at naming. I think we were all thinking that.” We…

Es tried to defend their horrible naming skills. “What?! Who else was gonna name him?”

Mikoto’s mother decided to join in the conversation, but left after putting her two cents in. “Me. Or Mikoto, since he’s where John came from.”

John smirked. “See, Es! But the name has stuck, so you owe me.”

Es crossed their arms, huffing. “I don’t owe you anything. You beat me up that one time, so if anything, you owe me!”

He couldn’t exactly find a defense for that, so he took their hat off their head and held it as high as he could reach, exposing their hat hair. “Hey!”

They jumped to get it, but to no avail. They looked pathetic.

Meanwhile, Mikoto’s mother and sister had already gone in to order. Order, like what a judge says?

It’s all a law reference.

John grinned. “You're a silly little creature, Suu.”

“You're not Mikoto, stop that.” I do not like that weird ass nickname.

He put on an innocent face. “What do you mean? I'm Mikoto, and I love my company so much! Hahaha, I would never commit murder. This must be a mistake!”

Es was somewhat surprised. “That's stuff he actually said in his first trial, how did you get it so accurately?”

“I hear this guy's internal monologue.”

That’ll do it. “Ah.”

 He threw their hat into the air while they were distracted, and they stepped back in surprise. He caught it. “Nice hat.”

“Get away from-”

The rest of the family brought over ice cream, and Es was handed a mash of colors in theirs that seemed unnatural.

“Is this food?”

“Eat it.” John asserted.

They shrugged. If this is poison, at least I don't have to worry about Milgram and all that stuff.

Worst case scenario, it doesn't kill me and it tastes bad. I'm not sure what my best case scenario is. Dying? It tasting good? We’ll see.

They bit down on the food with aggression, and it tasted… amazing, other than the fact that it was cold.

“What the heck is this? In a good way?” They temporarily forgot about their slight suicidal ideation.

“Bro has never heard of the wonders of overly processed foods…” the sister commented, smirking.

Why is she calling me bro? Huh? If I question her, will she bring out the shotgun? I'm scared of her. She’s my older sister now, isn’t she…

To be honest, Kotoko was scarier. I’ll be fine.

She wasn’t addicted to her phone, though… wait, right. Kotoko kinda was.

They grinned, and momentarily forgot their troubles in the face of their action. I’m so much better than these people. This tastes good. Mmm… ice cream… I like it…

They did get a brain freeze, and brought their hand up to their forehead in pain.

They got their head patted by John, who had somehow consumed his (larger serving of) ice cream. “Do you want the rest of that?”

“Yes?” They answered.

He grabbed a spoon, and took a bite of their ice cream. “Wow, this tastes nice.”

Es disliked the younger sibling experience. “Give me my hat back. I didn’t forget about that.”

“No.” However, he made a mistake: it happened to be in grabbing range. They quickly snatched it, and grinned in pride.

But, while they were distracted with John, they forgot about their other older sibling, who took a sizable amount of their precious ice cream.

I just discovered ice cream. Will they stop stealing it?

-

They were next in a car, making sure to avoid the seatbelt this time. About ⅓ of their ice cream had been usurped, and they didn't have the strength to defend it.

But, it wasn’t that bad. These people are nice…

I… I guess this is my life now? It’s not that bad.

Finally, there were no catches to this fact.

They would have to buy new clothes, the warden outfit was scratchy.

[purgemarchlockdown]

Kotoko's ideology

(Also Known As: Kotoko has fascist ideals and I read way too many wikipedia pages for this.) (CWs: Discussion centered around Prejudice, ableism, sexism, and other topics that are associated with right winged/fascist concepts)

(Note: I went on this rabbit hole because of This post from Gunsli that covers things I don't cover here. Go read it! Plus this post exists because of a lot of conversations from friends out of fandom, and in fandom, like 74n5n and the affermentioned Gunsli who also helped in proofreading!)

So Kotoko is one of my personal favorites of the cast. There's a lot of things I find interesting and intriguing about her and her characterization and her place in the story.

One of those things is her worldview. I'm obsessed with it to say the least. It's one of my favorite things about her characterization. I find it to be a complex and emphatic look at a specific worldview:

Fascism.

Vigilante Justice

Okay so, fascism as an ideology is something we tend to associate with conservative right-wingers and powerful political parties. In our stories, there's a bit of a mythical edge to the image of fascist dystopia. Something strong and uniform.

Like, a lot of cartoons and shows and comics have the alternate nazi dimension where fascism reigns supreme over the populace, for example. We got many films and shows of the heroes standing up against faceless images of Evil Nazis or Nazi-likes, with leaders who are powerful scientists or soldiers hiding somewhere scheming something.

We can tell if someone is a fascist, we say to ourselves. The aesthetic qualities of fascism are something we can all recognize. Right?

Kotoko Yuzuhira is a (notably afab, put a pin in this) college dropout vigilante.

This is immediately incompatible with how we tend to view it. She's not a faceless drone or general. She's someone working with limited resources trying to hunt down evil because The Law can't do it.

A Underdog Revolutionary, that's how she thinks of herself.

Kotoko: Yes. I hate evil. Hurting innocent people with violence, taking away from others, killing people… I hate all this evil behaviour! The law being unable to judge some sins, there's too many of these cases in this world. Having clearly bullied and torturing the weak, but exploiting loopholes in laws, there's so many sinners who still live in such a carefree manner! Even though I want to change this world, I alone only have this much power.

Kershaw argues that the difference between fascism and other forms of right-wing authoritarianism in the Interwar period is that the latter generally aimed "to conserve the existing social order", whereas fascism was "revolutionary", seeking to change society and obtain "total commitment" from the population.[47]

Robert O. Paxton finds that even though fascism "maintained the existing regime of property and social hierarchy", it cannot be considered "simply a more muscular form of conservatism" because "fascism in power did carry out some changes profound enough to be called 'revolutionary.'"[228] These transformations "often set fascists into conflict with conservatives rooted in families, churches, social rank, and property."

And that's what she...is. I'm not going to say Kotoko is part of a secret evil organization or anything like that. She is an underdog, at least at the start of Milgram. She's a single individual up against society and social order. A Heroic individual standing up against erroneous social structures.

Really, Kotoko presents as very classically heroic, she's directly acting to save people, confident, doing real research, actually finding those who deserve punishment and bringing it upon them.

She's determined, she's strong willed, even when she's suffering she doesn't stop.

T2Q6: Don’t you feel scared of killing people?  A: If it’s for the world. How I feel about it is completely irrelevant.

It's sad and tragic, but she knows that if no one does it then nothing will actually change.

Kotoko: If you brag about hating evil, act against it! Carry on the belief that your actions can change this world! If you only brag about it from afar, the world will just continue to rot no matter how many of you are there!

She holds no attachment, no qualms, no second guesses. She does what is good at the cost of her own self, she's a heroic ideal in that sense. A hero so willing to do what is right even at the cost of their own self.

T2Q14: Don’t you feel a sense of isolation in your current situation?  A: It feels like nothings changed. If the world gets even a little better just by me undertaking this isolation, then that is the role the strong play.

Someone who actually has the strength and intelligence to do the things that no one else can do.

T2Q7: Why did you choose law school?  A: Because I have my suspicions. That’s the majority of my reason to why I chose to study it. Cause it’s unsightly to spout complaints without having proper knowledge T1Q4: When did you start learning martial arts?  A: In elementary school, perhaps. Without enough power, you can't enforce justice and do the right thing, can you?

Who actually acts instead of just waiting around for the world to fix itself.

Kotoko: You keep asking for it, but as soon as it happens near you by your own choice, you all start complaining and evading your responsibility... You're always like this... Always such idiots!

Able to actually handle the problems thrown at her, instead of running away like a coward.

T2Q20: What would you have done if you weren’t forgiven?  A: I’d despise it all. To compromise justice just because you’re unable to withstand the pain that comes with it is unbelievable

Fascism supports the creation of a New Man who is a strong-willed, dynamic archetype, a figure of direct action and bellicose violence. An anti-individualist, he is characterized by a sense of confidence and masculinity, quiet dignity and self-worth, determination, and authoritativeness. With a detachment from romantic love, family background and schooling, his worldview is romanticized, passionate, serious and realist, preoccupied with the honoring of fallen heroes, a strong belief in personal responsibility, national rebirth and renewal.

And there's something genuinely admirable about that intent of hers. It's sincere. She's disgusted at the state of the world, at how horrible it's become. Even implying that this isn't the Normal version of the world, but a distorted, corrupted one.

Becoming light-headed again, it all becomes crazy The normalcy sought for, Fading away, Everytime death comes The soul moves forward

1. The mythical past—used to invoke a nostalgia for a fictional time when the nation was great as it was not yet sullied by the “Other.”

Kotoko's ideology is built on an idea of the world's Unnatural Impurity. The idea that there is something corrupting and poisoning it. That Whatever is causing harm to the world is an External Thing. One that can be beaten if she puts enough pressure on it. At least for a while.

T2Q5: How do you deal with evil that can’t be bested by strength?  A: Force it so that it can. No matter how long it takes, no matter what means I’ll need to use.

So I ask the question, what Does she consider evil?

Sinners

Okay, so she already answered this question, in her T1 interrogations she describes evil as:

T1Q20: What do you think is evil? A: Oppressing innocent weaklings.

Which is a pretty cut and dry answer that she elaborates on in her VDs:

Kotoko: Yes. I hate evil. Hurting innocent people with violence, taking away from others, killing people… I hate all this evil behaviour! The law being unable to judge some sins, there's too many of these cases in this world. Having clearly bullied and torturing the weak, but exploiting loopholes in laws, there's so many sinners who still live in such a carefree manner!

Case Closed! We don't have to think more about this! Everyone go home! The post is done!

... Okay so it's not as simple as that. It's pretty clear that Kotoko's opinions on evil and how it should be treated is a bit...

Kotoko: Treat you like a child? Hah, you’ve got to be kidding. Back when I was your age, I was already the person I am today. I don’t have any plans to let you get away with something just “because you’re a child.” ……remember that.

Extreme, to say the least. She's very "Violence First." Because:

T2Q16: Do you think there are the ‘weak’ among the other prisoners?  A: I’m sure there’s a lot. Those with weak wills will easily turn to evil. The only thing we can do is firmly instil the risk of turning to it.

Which- There's another contradiction! She just defined evil as the ones who oppress weaklings, yet right here she shows her disdain for the weak for so easily turning to evil.

And again, in the same trial, she refers to the prisoners as:

T2Q11: Is there really no chance to start anew for wrongdoers?   A: No way. Once a beast gets a taste for human flesh, it will always come back for seconds.

And continues to discuss the matters of the strong, and how there oppressing the weak.

T2Q10: What is your ideal image of a hero?  A: An ally of the weak. Someone who helps the weak and crushes the strong.

These are two very conflicting ideas. It's almost like:

Fascist societies rhetorically cast their enemies as "at the same time too strong and too weak". On the one hand, fascists play up the power of certain disfavored elites to encourage in their followers a sense of grievance and humiliation. On the other hand, fascist leaders point to the decadence of those elites as proof of their ultimate feebleness in the face of an overwhelming popular will.

And not only that- Kotoko casts herself as an underdog, and the assumption of that role is presuming one as "weaker than" or "having less opportunity/power/skill" than the one above, the elites above her who are stronger and more powerful than her. The Beasts who roam the land. Who will always win, because, in her own words.

T2Q18: What would you do if evil disappeared from the world? A: I see where you’re getting at. But I believe it will never truly disappear.

"Pacifism is trafficking with the enemy" because "life is permanent warfare" – there must always be an enemy to fight. Both fascist Germany under Hitler and Italy under Mussolini worked first to organize and clean up their respective countries and then build the war machines that they later intended to and did use, despite Germany being under restrictions of the Versailles treaty to not build a military force. This principle leads to a fundamental contradiction within fascism: the incompatibility of ultimate triumph with perpetual war.

Kotoko: How amusing! Are you really a warden?  Es: Shut up...  Kotoko: You let their sins off just because they're close to you? You're making the punishment less severe just because they get along with you? What's next? Going to give them leniency for their looks? For their personality? For how long have you known them?  Es: I told you... to shut up...  Kotoko: Why would I? I'm trying to tell you the truth. In MILGRAM, a warden with mindset of yours is just usele-  Es: Shut the hell up! [slaps]  Kotoko: [catching breath] "Violence"... you call it? Being angry at hurting your precious prisoners... [laughs] Ha... It's not even violence at all.  Es: ?..  Kotoko: Weak... You're too weak. With that fragile body of yours, you can't stop anyone. You can't protect anyone. You can't even do your justice. All imperfect.  Es: Imperfect?..  Kotoko: In order to stop someone, you have to squeeze their throat. Without mercy.

There's this sort of...self victimization to it? If that makes sense.

6. Victimhood—casting “Us” as victims of “Them”, who are taking resources from “Us” and demanding special rights.

A sense of frustration and anger at herself and the world for being so weak and pathetic.

A form of political behavior marked by obsessive preoccupation with community decline, humiliation or victimhood

And that these feelings of weakness and shame are real reasons to attack who she views as enemies. No matter if they are strong.

the belief that one’s group is a victim, a sentiment that justifies any action, without legal or moral limits, against its enemies, both internal and external;

Or weak.

Because Kotoko holds a lot of genuine anger at who she considers "weak." As shown above and in Many other instances. She literally calls them "Useless weaklings" in her T2 voiceline. She has this Deep Anger and Bitterness at those who she considers not doing enough to help. To those who are failing to actually do anything of actual substance.

Kotoko: How ridiculous... It's always like this... All of you weaklings always act like this... All of you enjoy seeing someone getting hurt... (...)  Kotoko: You keep asking for it, but as soon as it happens near you by your own choice, you all start complaining and evading your responsibility... You're always like this... Always such idiots!  Es: I acknowledge it. You're the strong one, and we're weak. You're right. But that's how we are.  Kotoko: You have no power, and yet you make no effort to gain it! You're talking about justice, but it just doesn't make sense! You're invested in people's disasters, yet you take a position of "I have nothing to do with it"! You can't even face your true selves!

"Contempt for the weak", which is uncomfortably married to a chauvinistic popular elitism, in which every member of society is superior to outsiders by virtue of belonging to the in-group. Eco sees in these attitudes the root of a deep tension in the fundamentally hierarchical structure of fascist polities, as they encourage leaders to despise their underlings, up to the ultimate leader, who holds the whole country in contempt for having allowed him to overtake it by force.

So, if the words strong and weak just refer to the enemy, and those descriptors of the enemy can change depending on which one is more suitable for the situation. Thus making the idea of the evil that are "oppressing innocent weaklings" be more a subjective concept.

Then...what else can we search for when it comes to determining how Kotoko views who is "evil."

Cause, it's not just because they don't agree with her. It wouldn't have mattered if they agreed with her or not really. Yuno says it outright:

Yuno: Really? If you ask me, Kotoko is someone I would never want to make my friend, though. She’s the type who picks a conclusion from the very beginning and won’t actually talk with you.

Kotoko has stated that she has been tracking Mikoto Kayano since the start. Even though at the time she was semi-amicable with everyone. With Mikoto even being rather insistent that he did nothing wrong at all.

Kotoko: Like me being suspicious of Kayano Mikoto’s actions, carefully tracking his actions, it's all under your permission.

And she's said this again in the interrogation! Saying that she had "her suspicions."

T2Q17: Why did you choose law school?  A: Because I have my suspicions. That’s the majority of my reason to why I chose to study it. Cause it’s unsightly to spout complaints without having proper knowledge

Suspicious about what? About who? She says it's the evil, the sinners, but who is this? Who is this evil? Criminals? That's just the terminology she uses. If it really was just criminals shouldn't she be against MILGRAM? Es? They did kidnap her and she has no Knowledge of their true intentions, and yet she doesn't trust her fellow prisoners but the Guard who locked them up.

"Obsession with a plot" and the hyping-up of an enemy threat. This often combines an appeal to xenophobia with a fear of disloyalty and sabotage from marginalized groups living within the society (such as the German elite's "fear" of the 1930s Jewish populace's businesses and well-doings; see also antisemitism). Eco also cites Pat Robertson's book The New World Order as a prominent example of a plot obsession.

And so, I ask again. Who does Kotoko believe to be evil?

"Your Existence is a Crime"

Chauvinism (/ˈʃoʊvɪnɪzəm/ SHOH-vih-nih-zəm) is the unreasonable belief in the superiority or dominance of one's own group or people, who are seen as strong and virtuous, while others are considered weak, unworthy, or inferior.

Kotoko Canonically Holds Ableist Beliefs.

This isn't up for debate.

22/12/15 (Kotoko’s Birthday)

Kotoko: Hm. The border between the two is getting a lot vaguer. Your entire existence is a crime. And I will see you’re punished for it. That is what Milgram, and Es, and I have chosen.

“UNDER” Doltish “001 Parasite”

Kotoko: “Fufufu, fufufufufu.You’re thinking some outrageous things.To be frank, it’s abnormal. But I don’t dislike it. If only all sinners were like you.”

Kotoko Also Canonically Holds Sexist Beliefs.

This also isn't up for debate.

Futa: Isn’t that obvious? What a stupid question. There’s no way a girl could win in a fight against a man. This is real life, not a manga. There’s too big a difference in body size. And that’s what determines the weight of your attacks.  Kotoko: ……Futa’s not entirely wrong there In a lot of martial arts, they specifically split up divisions based on body weight for that reason. I’m bantam, and he’d probably be either cruiser or heavy.

“UNDER” Obscene “002 Slut”

Now, as much as the phrases "Obscene Slut" and "Your entire existence is a crime" is Loaded. Let's pretend, for a second, that this doesn't necessarily mean that Kotoko, to some extent, believes that mentally ill people are evil/wrong and that women are weaker than men.

For a moment, let us pretend that Kotoko didn't just tell us and go into the finer details of how she views strong and weak.

Cause, there is a bit of consistent framing Kotoko uses when she's talking about "the enemy." Those who contribute something meaningful to society (in her eyes) are ones who "contribute" something meaningful to society mainly through the usage of direct action, physical strength, and physical/mental durability.

T1Q4: When did you start learning martial arts?  A: In elementary school, perhaps. Without enough power, you can't enforce justice and do the right thing, can you?

Kotoko: Es, look. Someone who committed a crime can only realise its severity through losing something. I've seen many criminals, but none of them would give way without pain.

Kotoko: Weak... You're too weak. With that fragile body of yours, you can't stop anyone. You can't protect anyone. You can't even do your justice. All imperfect.

Kotoko: You have no power, and yet you make no effort to gain it! You're talking about justice, but it just doesn't make sense! You're invested in people's disasters, yet you take a position of "I have nothing to do with it"! You can't even face your true selves!   Es: Whatever you say.  Kotoko: If you brag about hating evil, act against it! Carry on the belief that your actions can change this world! If you only brag about it from afar, the world will just continue to rot no matter how many of you are there! If you don't have strength on your own, let me take care of it, Es! I can do it in MILGRAM!

T1Q: What is your ideal image of a hero?  A: An ally of the weak. Someone who helps the weak and crushes the strong.

T2Q14: Don’t you feel a sense of isolation in your current situation?  A: It feels like nothings changed. If the world gets even a little better just by me undertaking this isolation, then that is the role the strong play.

Those who cannot do that and are "unable to contribute" or somehow disrupt the stable world, thus causing it's normalcy to "fade away" are parasites.

“UNDER” Doltish “001 Parasite”

Obscene

“UNDER” Obscene “002 Slut”

An existence that is disruptive to the world at large.

Kotoko: Your entire existence is a crime. And I will see you’re punished for it.

Who are Weak due to a issue in there mental state and need to be warned against the consequences of "turning to evil."

T2Q16: Do you think there are the ‘weak’ among the other prisoners?  A: I’m sure there’s a lot. Those with weak wills will easily turn to evil. The only thing we can do is firmly instil the risk of turning to it.

Or be treated as irrational beasts that need to be firmly put down because nothing else will get through to them.

T2Q11: Is there really no chance to start anew for wrongdoers?  A: No way. Once a beast gets a taste for human flesh, it will always come back for seconds.

Fascism emphasizes direct action, including supporting the legitimacy of political violence, as a core part of its politics.[264] Fascism views violent action as a necessity in politics that fascism identifies as being an "endless struggle";[265] this emphasis on the use of political violence means that most fascist parties have also created their own private militias (e.g. the Nazi Party's Brown shirts and Fascist Italy's Blackshirts). The basis of fascism's support of violent action in politics is connected to social Darwinism.[265] Fascist movements have commonly held social Darwinist views of nations, races and societies.[266] They say that nations and races must purge themselves of socially and biologically weak or degenerate people, while simultaneously promoting the creation of strong people, in order to survive in a world defined by perpetual national and racial conflict.[267]

Social Darwinism is the study and implementation of various pseudoscientific theories and societal practices that purport to apply biological concepts of natural selection and survival of the fittest to sociology, economics and politics.[1][2] Social Darwinists believe that the strong should see their wealth and power increase, while the weak should see their wealth and power decrease.

"The only thing we can do is firmly instil the risk of turning to it."

Kotoko's ideological view is, at the very best, biased against those of marginalized groups or of "degenerate" thoughts and actions, and at the very worst, actively targets them because she personally believes that they Do Not Contribute to Society.

But we aren't done there yet.

Werewolves

Let's take that pin out now.

Kotoko has gone on record that she views Femininity as:

T1Q10: What do you think about the word 'feminimity'?  A: It's one of the means you can take. It's something you can freely choose depending on the scene, so it's not something to cling onto.

Now, as I have shown. She's kinda sexist. Which throws into question how she perceives herself.

Since, I have just asserted the idea that Kotoko does, at the very least, hold some concerning ideas about Women, and I think most people would notice that this is a bit contradictory when she herself isn't really the feminine ideal as decreed by the patriarchy either.

Now, just to be clear here, no, I do not think women should be baby machines. I am a cat who cannot perceive it properly.

However, if we are going by the strict gender binary and the stereotypes associated with it. Kotoko is pretty masculine. She puts focus on physical strength, she's mentally strong in the face of ills, she doesn't show much emotion, so on.

However, as Utena and also The World has proven to us. Just because you present or act in "non-traditional manners" doesn't mean You've Deconstructed the Gender Binary and the Patriarchal View of the World we Learn from the Society around us.

You can be the butchest girl the prison can handle and still hold traditional gender roles.

And the way Kotoko interacts with the world indicates that she still Holds these ideas, even if she has deconstructed them a bit, and since we are talking about her ideology...

Fascist Italy promoted what it considered normal sexual behaviour in youth while denouncing what it considered deviant sexual behaviour.[271] It condemned pornography, most forms of birth control and contraceptive devices (with the exception of the condom), homosexuality and prostitution as deviant sexual behaviour,

Sexual anxiety—as the “Other” embraces non-traditional approaches to sexuality,

But, going further into the way she views masculinity specifically...

"Machismo", which sublimates the difficult work of permanent war and heroism into the sexual sphere. Fascists thus hold "both disdain for women and intolerance and condemnation of nonstandard sexual habits, from chastity to homosexuality".

Machismo, Exaggerated pride in masculinity, perceived as power, often coupled with a minimal sense of responsibility and disregard of consequences. In machismo there is supreme valuation of characteristics culturally associated with the masculine and a denigration of characteristics associated with the feminine.

Futa: Isn’t that obvious? What a stupid question. There’s no way a girl could win in a fight against a man. This is real life, not a manga. There’s too big a difference in body size. And that’s what determines the weight of your attacks.  Kotoko: ……Futa’s not entirely wrong there

"Without enough power, you can't enforce justice" is what she said, isn't it?

Road to Hell

Okay, there was 700 more things I wanted to talk about but because I haven't even gotten into:

Through all of that, there would be one great leader who would battle the representatives of the old system with grassroots support.[1][2] In the fascist utopia, one mass of people will supposedly appear who have only one goal: to create their new future.[1][2] Such a fascist movement would ideally have infinite faith in its mythical hero who would stand for everything the movement believes in.[1][2] According to this utopian ideology, under the guidance of their leader the country would then rise like a phoenix from the ashes of corruption and decadence.[1][2]

Or her ideals of heroism or her view of violence in detail or-

But I think I can leave that to the people reading this. This post is getting really long and I'm trying to still keep it structured. I know all my links are Wikipedia and one Britannica. I had the energy to transcribe my dad's books on this I would.

However, we also do need to ask, where does this leave us?

Y'know, since Kotoko is the Audience Parallel and Milgram is a Social Commentary Webseries.

Well, Kotoko is a character in fiction, and fiction is the safest place to explore this. Kotoko Yuzuriha is a familiar character in the sense that a lot of people are like her actually.

Gunsli has brought up the idea that Kotoko was radicalized by news, and I personally think All the characters in Milgram have underlying right wing ideas and violent views on the world. It's not something...unique to them even. We call them conservative and traditional because to a lot of people it's "just the way the world works." Kotoko’s not special or unique for believing in these things.

She’s asserted multiple times that she’s had a “normal life” and whether or not you doubt the validity of that statement. There is nothing inherent about Kotoko that makes her more susceptible to this. 

And I think those are themes that are worth exploring.

[red-moon-at-night]

I keep thinking about yonah meaning dove in hebrew and the idea of kotoko viewing herself as a symbol of peace and salvation....... I'm so *crosses one leg over the other and leans on the table with my elbows, cupping my chin with my hands and batting my eyelashes* it's just so intriguing y’know

[milgram-tournament]

MILGRAM Best Song Tournament, Round 1, Match 6 ALL KNOWING AND ALL AGONY vs. TEAR DROP

Propaganda for both options under the cut!

Propaganda for AKAA:

"AKAA is wonderful song with such bitter irony, bc that doesn't look like song someone who was voted inno… And we know more about Haruka! we see his mother! AND "MAKE MY DREAMU COME TRUE"??? NO I AM NOT CRYING YOU ARE CRYING (also I should say this is first song i heard and I love AKAA so, so much <3 let's do it <3)"

---

1. It establishes so much of Haruka's character and backstory that was omitted from Weakness!! It helps shape Haruka's character so much and really helped with voting.

2.THE VOCALS OH MY GOD. This song really lets the voice of Haruka's VA shine!! It has some really nice growls but also has that soft part in the bridge!!

Overall it's just really good I love Haruka Sakurai

---

Propaganda for AKAA:

Definitely one of the most hype songs from T2

The vocals are Banging

Absolutely love the taxidermy symbolism

Haruka is a sad little puppy

Everyone stand for the Mommy Issues Athem 🫡

Propaganda for TEAR DROP:

"yuno kashiki enthusiast here anyways tear drop propaganda WE BALL

let's start off with the lyrics! holy fuck, i'm so glad yuno finally got to say what she's wanted to say!!

and she fully shows the fact that she does compensated dating through the lyrics ("the wanted wanting the wanted")

and even if it sounds like she's scolding the audience for the song, she's also scolding her clients! they only perceive her as a certain type of character and deciding that's all she is. She's upset that we decided based on how "naïve" she looked instead of her actual crime (to be honest, I could write a whole analysis into why her murder is perfect for her character anywa) and she doesn't care what will happen to her, she needs her opinions heard

also kinda rap section?? banger fr

THE VISUALS!! GOOD LORD THE VISUALS!!! THEY ARE SO BANGER!!! they're really pretty and gosh i literally don't know what to say, the scene where vampire is in the background and it transitions to yuno sitting on her bed... the pink tinted glasses (YES FUCK I LOVE THAT MAN!!!!) THE COAT!! THOSE INBETWREN SCENES i'm obbing

AND THE INSTRUMENTAL!! PLEASE IM BEGGING YOU ALL LISTEN TO THE INSTRUMRNTAL OF HER SONG THERES SO MANY SMALL DETAILS!! SIRENS, TEAR DROPS RAHHH THE CLAPS/CLICKING TJE TECHNO PIANO GUITAR??? THE INSTRIMENTS I CANT NAME I THINK THEY ALL HAVE SOME READON OF BEING IN THE SONG AND I WILL FIND OUT IN AN ANAKYSIS POST I JUDT LOVE IT AUEUEU

literally tear drop is the banger ever i listen to this shit religiously thank you for listening to my tear drop propaganda"

---

-Yuno’s voice. Enough said. -The imagery in the MV is brilliantly used, and doesn’t shy away from the horrors of Yuno’s line of work. -Vampire cameo!!! -Almost Lo-Fi vibes to the instrumental?? I can’t really explain it but it’s a vibe and I’m 100% here for it,

---

"For teardrop: The pink aesthetic in the MV as a whole makes it super nice to look at :D"

[polarmary]

ITS HERE!! I FINALLY DID IT!!

I was reminded of these little guys existence two months ago and was sad when I noticed there wasnt a single Milgram one!! After some days passed I decided to say fuck it and do my faves myself. Sooo here's Fuuta!!

Some frames are a little derpy on the legs and how the shirt moves but I tried my best T~T

->You can get the gremlin from here!! Have fun :b If you encounter any problem feel free to comment or DM me, I'll try to help the best I can! (This is the first time i did anything like this so bear with me pls T~T)

Kotoko is next because those two are the ones I wanted to see walk around my screen (and throw around) in the first place, BUUUUT- If theres a specific prisoner you want and enough people also ask for that one then I may do it (they just take too much time and work to do I'm sorry)

[misrepresentedmorallygrey]

PROPAGANDA

John

This fella is Fascinating. just trust me on this he deserves to be here

He tried so hard to do the right thing, he feels bad and says things would be better if he was never born. He thinks he should've just stayed acting like a monster and continued to act threatening.

(LONG PROPAGANDA INCOMING)

John. Milgram. Here's a short description of the fortunes and misfortunes of the guy. It gets worse before it gets better (probably).

While MILGRAM is a prison that judges a bunch of sympathetic killers, it doesn't consider him to be one – it didn't even exactly know he existed until too little too late, when it got its grabby hands on the brain of prisoner 009, who claimed to not know anything about any murder he'd have committed. Then, footage from his brain was extracted, as MILGRAM does, into a music video, and… that was MeMe. Ninth prisoner, Kayano Mikoto, was revealed to have DID, and what obviously who do you think actually Killed Someone?

Enter John. Well. Mikoto is half deeply unaware half subconsciously scared of his existence, so the MV painted him in a rather. Deeply disturbing way, bathing in bloody baths and all that (not a blood bath though! easy mistake). Adding to that him showing up in the first Voice Drama for five seconds to punch the "protagonist" and yell for a bit, and the result wasn't. Assuring. The fandom proceeded to treat him like a cardboard cutout and variously dunk on MILGRAM for having a cliché "evil" character w/ DID despite the overall well handling of complex characters.

Two years time skip: second season ending. We get to prisoner 009 again. The protagonist Finally gets to chat with John: and voila, he's admitting to the crime, he's apparently "killed a bunch of people because they annoyed him", which means, as he's saying, Mikoto has nothing to do with the crime at all! And he, as per the judging system, should be forgiven, right! Well, he's so full of shit. The music video immediately reveals how protective he feels of Mikoto (and well, he definitely doesn't rebuke That one), that the events of murder were somehow tied in to Mikoto's job at a black company, his continuous overworking and him being mentally on the brink of breaking; that any committed violence was For The Sake of Mikoto and that John feels deeply horrible for messing up his life in any way. By making himself into the image of a "monster" he's trying to make Mikoto look good in comparison and be forgiven and all. He also mentioned if Mikoto is voted innocent he's gonna try to go dormant since he's The Issue, right, and the audience/protagonist hates him, Right, and Mikoto Also Hates him, Right?

I'm underselling the sheer devotion of this guy tbh.

Yeah, the fandom results were kinda mixed on that one. Lots of people immediately started to love him dearly and kinda forgot any people were maimed or killed with baseball bats; lots also got sold on him "messing up Mikoto's life" and actually voted Mikoto innocent Specifically because of John's promise to eventually "disappear". There's more of the babygirlifying kind in the English side of the fandom that I've seen, to be fair. And that's around where we are!

Dazai Osamu

He did bad things in the Mafia. He's trying to get better. He abused people but he also saved other people. Fans portraying him as an unforgivable abuser are WRONG. He perpetuated an abused cycle on Akutagawa thinking he was right to do that, because of trauma, before he could leave. But he left. He's still treating Akutagawa wrong because he's trying to be a better person but doesn't realize that it will not erase what he did and that he can't just ignore the past. Fans portraying him as a pure angel who didn't know what he was doing because he was sad are WRONG TOO. He abused Akutagawa. He was traumatized but it doesn't give him the right to traumatize innocent people. He's trying to be a better person but he can't keep ignoring Akutagawa. He needs to apologize. And even that won't erase what he did. Dazai is a complex character in a complex situation. He left the abuse cycle and tries to be a good person but did unforgivable things while he was still in this cycle and refuses to aknowledge them. He's not a monster but he's not innocent either.

Dazai used to be a mafia executive until his best friend (a former assassin who remained in the mafia but refused to kill) died. As the friend was dying he told him "I know you don't care about whether you're a good or bad person, so if it doesn't matter to you, be on the side that saves people." Despite that, I've seen countless people insisting that Dazai is a good person/trying his best to be a good person when he really only changed sides by joining a detective agency, while still continuing to do the same things he did while in the mafia (including but not limited to: harassing his coworkers for fun, manipulating people, killing people instead of just trying to incapacitate them, and even torturing an innocent man in one of the side stories). That being said, he's not evil either. Even when he does cruel things, it's not for the sake of being cruel (even when he harasses his coworkers he still has limits), it's just a means to an end. I think most of the confusion comes from a scene where he's talking to a young girl, another former mafia member, who asks if he thinks people can change and he assures her they can, but what the anime left out was that he was thinking about his former assassin friend during that discussion, not himself. The entire series is themed around gray morality, to the point where it's even reflected in the main protagonist and antagonist's designs (mainly white with a bit of black, and mainly black with a bit of white), so I feel like insisting that he's a good person now completely misses the point of the story.