#This is once again missing Felix hours

[secret-realm]

I was well aware that the last update was on February 2022, but I didn't remember the exact day.

I checked now, and it was on February 3rd

So, 1 year and 13 days...

I miss my beloved so much.

I honestly could wait as much time as necessary if I knew everything will continue at some point.

However, it's so uncertain whereas Last Legacy will be finished at all that it honestly feels terrible.

[afterglowsainz]

exile | joão felix

summary: no one knows about joão’s girlfriend, until an invitation to go to a game and an undesired ship with one of his teammates leaves him no choice but to post you

fc: various girls from pinterest

request: here

a/n: in honor of portugal classifying to quarterfinals … love joão i swear!! sorry it took me so long to write this it was just very general but i still hope you like it <3

—

liked by yourusername, jpcancelo and others

joaofelix79 🇵🇹❤️

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username let’s goooo!

username YOU’RE SO FINE

username we’re soooo back

username 🤷🏽

username im rooting for you 🔥

yourusername ✨✨✨ (liked by joaofelix79)

liked by bffusername, joaofelix79 and others

yourusername last days visiting💐

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friend1 ughhh so gorgeous!

friend2 have fun! miss you💗

bffusername prize to the prettiest girl

friend3 MINE

joaofelix79 😍

friend4 officially in love with you

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mancitywags ruben dias was seen after the portugal vs czechia game talking with his partners and a mysterious brunette who can possibly be his new girlfriend

tagged rubendias

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username wow wow wow hold on

username omg she’s pretty!

username someone know who she is?

username i’ve been looking for her but she doesn’t seem to be famous

username damn ruben moves fast

username they look good together 🥰

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joaofelix79 quarters 🇵🇹

tagged cristiano

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username 🔥🔥🔥

username we’re winning this

username incredible performance so far!

cristiano 🇵🇹🇵🇹🇵🇹

yourusername cuteee🥰 (liked by joaofelix79)

username omg???

username isn’t she the girl that was seen with ruben?

username suspicious 🤨

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footballgossip the portugal national team was seen last night partying and ruben dias was spotted once again with the mysterious brunette which name is y/n y/l/n

tagged rubendias and yourusername

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username but wasn’t she commenting on joão’s post???

username and he comments on hers too🤨

username weeeeird

username maybe they’re just friends?

username why is she famous anyway?

username she isn’t

username guy she just went private 😩

username well i can’t blame her she went from having 800 followers to 350k in two hours

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joaofelix79 quality time❤️

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username WHAAAAT

username omg i can’t even process the first pic much less the other two

username last pic is so cute 🥰

rubendias clearing up the gossip 🤣

joaofelix79 the party rumor was a bit much

rubendias agree!

yourusername oh my god 🙄

username lol this team is not serious

username and now i’m in love with her

yourusername niceeee😮‍💨

joaofelix79 😇

[3rachaslut]

kinks i think skz would have (pt. 1)

warnings: smut MINORS DNI!! read sub headers for warnings ig?

(some include: degrading, slapping, dumbification) let me know if i’ve missed anything xx

youtiful was playing whilst i wrote this lol help

part 2, part 3

chan — mirror sex

because seeing you underneath him breathless and begging for more isn’t enough, he needs to see ALLLL of you all at once

would grab your hair whilst telling you to look at yourself, his “beautiful girl”

NECK KISSES. OMG SO MANY NECK KISSES

“most gorgeous girl in the world aren’t you baby?” he would make you agree by rutting quicker into you when you mewl a yes

grabbing your thighs, ass, tits. pretty much groping you all over

lee know — breathe play

no because he’s actually OBSESSED with watching your eyes roll back into your head from bliss

he’s so degrading with his words too?! “pathetic little slut gone all dumb on my cock?”, “be quiet whore” etc

would ask you if you want to breathe but would just laugh at you when you choke out “yes sir” like haha you actually thought?

FACE. SLAPPING.

would let go of your throat for like 3 seconds just to hear you gasp for breath and then his hand is around your neck AGAIN damn

“only good girls get to breathe baby”

changbin — gagging

would deadass SHOVE your head down onto his cock just to hear you choke on it, you’re heaving and everything

oml the amount of spit falling down your chin and onto your thighs is CRAZY

“fuck yesss baby girl. such a good girl taking my cock. shit-” whilst you’re literally suffocating on his dick

yanks at your hair, tugging you off him just to force you to look up at him with mascara running down your face and bloodshot eyes

he will NOT stop rutting his hips tryna get his cock further down your throat even though it’s allllll the way in man?

“love seeing you this much of a mess doll. fuck-”

hyunjin — breeding

i swear you and hyunjin have the most beautiful, loving sex ever !!!

like, he will cup your face with both hands whilst planting kisses everywhere on your face and calling you beautiful names

“my angel, you’re so pretty”

will practically BEG you to let him come inside you. “just wanna feel you around me baby”

WHIMPERING HYUNE FR

would tuck your hair behind your ears so the sweat on your forehead doesn’t make it stick to you :’(

“you’re just too beautiful sweetheart, please let me come inside your pretty little pussy?”

jisung — squirting

literally the most pussy drunk member of the group?!

as in, he would quite happily eat you out for hours but his FAVOURITE sight is you squirting (like, he’s actually obsessed)

literally BEGS for you squirt on his face because he wants to “taste you”

his chin would be such a mess from being allllll over your pussy but he’s the happiest he’s ever been seeing you moan uncontrollably from his fingers inside you

“want you to squirt all over my fingers baby, that’s it, thereeee you go”

KISSES KISSES KISSES EVERYWHERE

felix — dress up

you wanna rile felix up? wear a maid outfit and watch that guy FOLD

would deadass blush so hard when you ask him if you look pretty like duh, the man has a tent in his pants?

“did you dress up for me baby?”

SO MANY COMPLIMENTS !!

“you look incredible baby girl, can i touch you?” and how could you say no when he asked so politely aww :’(

“you drive me crazy y/n wow”

seungmin — orgasm control

he. is. filthy. with his dirty talk and loves degrading you whilst edging you over and over again omg

would actually laugh in your face when you beg him to let you cum

“who says i will even let you cum tonight baby? bad girls don’t get to cum do they?”

the way he speaks to you like he would speak to an actual dog gets you HORNY. “do you think you deserve to cum doll? have you been a good puppy? i don’t think you have”

and on the nights he would let you cum, he would force you to do it over and over again whilst laughing at your pleas because your pussy is RAW

“isn’t this what you wanted pup?”

jeongin — voyeurism

no because innie loves NOTHING more than to watch you pleasure yourself oml

like, you’d forbid him from touching himself just to see him get so worked up from the scene in front of him and he’s such a whimpering MESS omg

“please please let me touch myself baby, your pussy is so pretty”

SO. WHINEY. !!

like, he’s practically on the verge of tears from being so horny and not being able to touch his cock :(

when you finally let him touch himself over you, he would thank god and omg his whimpers when he comes are so subby omg omg omg

[soobnny]

dating him | lee felix

❝ if you win this round, i’ll give you a kiss ❞

chan | lee know | changbin | hyunjin | han | FELIX | seungmin | jeongin

lee felix

the pda king that u are

sorry to get straight to the point but

he’s always touching u in some way 😭

obsessed i’m telling u

whether that’s a hand on ur back pocket, maybe ur intertwined hands in his hoodie pocket, his legs over urs on the couch

he just wants to be touching u all the time bc he is just a lovestruck boy at the end of the day

and there is no feeling more blissful than having you so close to him

i 100% stand by the idea that he would be so insufferable if circumstances were to separate u for a moment

would send u 91837473 texts

calls u too if u aren’t busy

most preferably facetime so he can see u

the boys end up gifting him a pillow with ur face on it bc he just would not shut up about missing u

he is also the saw this n thought of u texts

yes that’s why u receive a million texts

bc a million things remind him of u

he sees a spoon?

hey! u use a spoon too!

the weather is nice?

he has to tell you that! he knows u love when the weather is nice!

speaking of texts, good morning and good evening texts at the most abnormal hours

(sent at 3:24pm) good morning princess ❤️

(sent at 5:11pm) goodnight my love

moving on

u two actually dated bc of hyunjin

look i know felix is extremely good looking and handsome and could pull 92848 girls

but he is honestly just such a shy boy

“hi, felix lost his number. can u give him yours instead?”

“did u just hit on me for him?”

😭😭😭😭😭

TEARSSSSS like hyunjin is shameless

but whatever, it worked

sometimes felix sends him a gift too on ur anniversary bc it’s all thanks to him

one of his favorite memories of u two dating is when u taught him how to braid his hair

who knew it could be so convenient

and look THAT good too

u catch his hair braided while gaming when u surprise visit once

it isn’t as neat as it would’ve been if u were the one who did it

but u could recognize that technique anywhere

it’s the one u’d taught him noooooo 😭

love language: physical touch and baking sessions and teaching u to game

physical touch done

next up .. baking sessions

u could either make the best batch of brownies or almost burn the kitchen down bc u two were too busy making out

u’d also get into a mini food fight

would 100% put red icing on ur lips and blue on his and say u two should make purple

he thinks he’s so cool and smooth

who’s gonna tell him

he’s a LEWSERRRRR but your loser

felix just honestly is happy he gets to combine two of his favorites: baking and u

and then there’s him teaching u to game

he would be so patient with u

and if u were playing, he’d be by ur side the whole time and coaching u

he’d take videos and photos for sure

if he’s the one playing, best believe you’re on his lap if the game isn’t all that competitive

“boooooo! hyung!” — jeongin 2024

he says that bc while felix was communicating, he heard u

felix also strikes me as the type to build u a world in minecraft

he’d make you a cute little house with cherry blossoms around and a garden and a pet

and he calls you just to RAMBLE excitedly about it

man he’s just too cute what the hell 😭😭😭😭

his dates are actually kind of expensive

and his gifts too

he’d be like “no no no i swear it isn’t expensive”

and it’s a louis vitton necklace or smthn

u have so many cute dresses

he especially loves picnics with wine and fresh fruits and carefully made sandwiches in a basket

and FRUIT PICKING

he would love that so much

i think felix would also love if u helped him dye his hair

bc again .. he loves having u close

so i said changbin fails at legos right

felix is too good

he LOVES legos

he even buys u those flower ones

he would do anything to spend time w u

including legos

he particularly loves that it takes kind of a long time so u two would be together the whole time

anyways felix is honestly just such a sweetheart

very very very green flag behavior

he respects ur needs

listens to u without judgement

u have such a healthy relationship with his family

like his mom calls you

“hi! felix isn’t home rn”

“oh no no, i called to say hi to you”

oh they love you

gagged felix

u have dates with his sisters

and it confuses him too like

u would come over their house and he’d tell his family like oh! my gf is allergic to this!

his mom replies “i know”

LIKE WDYM YOU KNOW

felix couldn’t be any more happy anyway

it’s great

congratulations ❤️

note. credits to user @.luvknow for the layout of this post! let me know what you think! please discuss these with me i’m crazy

[hxxsxxng]

JAKE 심재윤 - LOVE FROM AFAR

MINORS DNI

Word Count : 3.9k

Genre : SMUT, ANGST

Content : bar fight, jealousy, toxic ex, mention on infidelity, unprotected sex, oral f receiving, praising, creampie, implied consumption of alcohol, sloppy make out….. let me know if i missed anything!

Preview : Once Jake finds out that his girl of interest is single, who knows what measures he is willing to take it to protect her?

Authors Note : Thank you to whoever requested this, I definitely had fun writing it!

SUPPORT BY REBLOGGING if you want

You were having a great night catching up with your buddies Felix and Bangchan at the local pub. It had been too long since you all got together like the old days. As they joked and reminisced about the past, you couldn't help but feel grateful for having such caring friends in your life.

Suddenly, Felix's friend Jake arrived, pulling up a chair to join your booth. You vaguely remembered meeting the scruffy-yet-handsome guy with a warm smile once or twice before at other hangouts. He seemed nice enough, if not a little quieter and awkward around you specifically.

As the four of you continued swapping stories and laughing over fresh rounds, something about Jake's furtive glances and blushing kept catching your eye. You couldn't deny the slightly giddy feeling it gave you to rendered this usually composed guy so flustered. He was pretty cute when he got all shy like that.

Maybe it was the liquid courage, or maybe you just felt emboldened by the positive energy. Whatever the reason, you decided to be a little flirty as you leaned in closer to Jake.

"So do you boys always get this rowdy, or am I just bringing out the wild side?" you teased with a wink.

Jake's eyes went wide as his cheeks flushed an even darker crimson. He seemed to be struggling to formulate a response as he rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. "Um...w-well, I uh, we don't want to...you know, shock you or anything--"

He was saved by the interruption of your phone ringing. Flashing an apologetic smile, you excused yourself from the booth to take the call. It was your boyfriend wanting to know if you were free later to come over and watch a movie.

"Yeah babe, I'll be there in a couple hours!" you replied affectionately before rejoining the group.

If you had turned back around just a few seconds sooner, you might have caught the way Jake's expression fell when he overheard you refer to your boyfriend. He shrunk back into himself, the brief moment of bravery evaporating.

Over the ensuing months, you noticed Jake never acted quite the same way again when you were around. He was polite and friendly, but also seemed to keep a distance, like he was afraid to let himself get too close. You figured he just wasn't someone who enjoyed casual flirting even in jest. Either way, it didn't really matter since you were happily taken anyway.

Until one day...you weren't anymore. Just like that, a two-year relationship came crashing down after you discovered your boyfriend's unfaithfulness. You were blindsided and devastated.

As you nursed your broken heart, Felix and Bangchan were there every step of the way, rallying around you with movie nights, distraction activities, and a steadfast supportive presence. True friends when you needed them most.

One evening a couple months later, you arrived at a dimly lit bar where the three of you normally met up. You were finally feeling like your old self again after weeks of sadness and anger. Ready to just be around your friends and enjoy a fun night out.

The moment you walked through the door, you heard a familiar voice call out from a booth off to the side.

"Hey! Over here!"

It was Jake, looking as handsome as you remembered even under the low lighting. He had stood up from the booth and was waving you over with a warm smile.

You couldn't help but feel a small flutter of nerves mixed with excitement. Despite the slight awkwardness that encounter at the pub, you always thought Jake seemed like a good guy deep down. And if he was here hanging out with Felix and Bangchan...maybe you could finally get to know him better without that weird tension.

As you reached the booth, exchanging greetings and hello hugs, you noticed Jake's arms linger around you perhaps a beat longer than necessary. And this time when he looked into your eyes, there wasn't a hint of shyness or restraint behind them.

"It's really great to see you out and about again," he murmured once you were all seated. "You're, uh...you're looking as beautiful as ever."

You felt your face warm at the sincere compliment, an unfamiliar bout of flustered energy starting to buzz within you. What was this all of a sudden?

"Uh thanks, Jake...you're not looking too bad yourself," you managed to reply, unable to stop yourself from chewing your lower lip nervously.

Felix and Bangchan traded looks like they were watching a private tennis match, wondering just how heated this newly charged atmosphere might get.

Before things could get too tense though, Felix cleared his throat and changed the subject, regaling you all with a story about a hilarious screw-up at his job earlier that week. You forced yourself to shift your gaze off Jake's intense stare and laugh along with the others.

By the end of the night, you almost felt...disappointed? Like there was some

elephant in the room you wished would address itself directly instead of all this subtext. You brushed it off as emotional vulnerability from your recent breakup making you read into things.

The weeks after, however, proved those suspicions false. Because every interaction, every hangout, every moment with the four of you together continued carrying the same electrifying undercurrent of tension, especially between you and Jake.

The way his warm eyes would linger on you when you laughed, the random innocent touches and grazed caresses that made your skin tingle, the undisguised admiration and want in his gaze when you caught him staring...it was all quickly becoming impossible to ignore or chalk up to simple friendliness.

You couldn't lie, you felt it too - that persistent, gnawing pull toward Jake growing stronger with each encounter. There was just something magnetic about his presence, his humor, his gentle teasing and care for your emotional wellbeing.

But you were still terrified of being vulnerable and opening yourself up again so soon after being burned. Especially to someone like Jake, who clearly had some very intense feelings starting to develop, if they weren't already there to begin with.

That fear reached a fever pitch one evening when the four of you were gathered at Felix's place before heading out. You had just finished getting ready in the bathroom when Jake poked his head in to ask if you needed any help with your hair or makeup.

"Sure, I could use another set of hands back here if you don't mind," you replied absentmindedly, turning away from the mirror to grab a comb.

The next thing you felt were Jake's strong hands gently gathering your hair as he positioned himself directly behind you. His broad chest was nearly pressed against your back, the warmth radiating off him in tantalizing waves.

"Here, let me..." he murmured in that deep, gravelly tone so close to your ear. You caught the intense look in his eyes through the mirror as his fingers deftly began running and separating through your locks.

Every brush of his knuckles against the nape of your neck made your heart skip a beat. The soft, even breaths puffing against your skin raised delicious goosebumps along your arms. And the smoldering, hooded gaze he was burning into you through the mirror reflection was quickly dampening your panties with arousal.

You were both entirely under each other's spells, the thick sexual tension swirling through the small bathroom like an intoxicating fog. All Jake would have to do is turn your chin and slant his lips over yours and you would have melted into a helpless puddle against him.

The trance was finally broken by a muffled shout from the other room of Felix yelling "You two good back there?"

As if getting doused with a bucket of cold water, you and Jake sprung apart, awkwardness and uncertainty crashing back in. You muttered a quick thanks before rushing out of the bathroom, flustered and needing to put some distance between the two of you before you did something reckless.

After tiptoeing around each other for a couple more weeks, you finally broke down one night and asked Felix what the deal was with Jake. Why he was giving you such intense, loaded vibes lately despite having barely interacted before.

Felix let out a long sigh before breaking the truth - Jake had been harboring a massive secret crush on you for years, long before you started dating your now-ex even. But he never acted on it or admitted those feelings because you were already in a committed relationship by the time you met him.

Now that you were newly single, however, all those long-simmering emotions and attractions were bubbling out from Jake at full force. He was struggling with wanting to pursue you, but also not wanting to make you uncomfortable or disrespect any boundaries while you were fresh out of your heartbreak.

You were stunned speechless, your mind swirling as you processed this information. All those small nuanced moments between you and Jake over the past couple of months finally clicked into place. How had you not seen it sooner?

More importantly...what did you want to do about it now? The thought of exploring those sparks between you and Jake made your heart race. But you were also still so freshly vulnerable from being crushed by betrayal and heartache. Could you really take that leap again so soon?

~~~~~

In the weeks that followed after Felix filled you in about Jake's long-standing romantic feelings, you couldn't stop mulling it over. Every time you saw Jake's warm smile or got pulled into his magnetic presence, your mind raced with the possibilities.

There was no denying the potent chemistry and tension that had been building between you two. Even before you knew about Jake's crush, you felt that persistent pull towards him, that fire simmering with every loaded gaze or innocent touch.

Now that you had context for what was truly driving that intensity from his end...it felt like the coals had been stoked into an inferno. You couldn't get Jake off your mind, couldn't stop imagining what it would feel like to finally act on those sparks.

The more you allowed yourself to lean into the fantasy, the more you realized you were falling for him too. Despite the all-too-fresh sting of betrayal, Jake's caring presence and unguarded desire for you were quickly healing those wounds.

Of course, you had reservations about opening yourself up again so soon. But Jake was clearly different - his intentions pure, his affections transparent. Maybe taking that terrifying leap would be worth it after all.

One night, after spending an evening together that had your skin tingling from lingering caresses and eye contact, you finally summoned the courage to go for it. As he walked you to your car, you spun around, grasped the front of his shirt, and pulled him into a searing kiss.

Jake instantly melted into you with a rumbling groan, his strong hands grasping at your waist to pull you flush against him. You lost yourselves in that fervent clash of lips and roaming touches, all those months of unresolved tension pouring out.

When you finally parted, cheeks flushed and chests heaving, the depths of Jake's gaze sparked with pure reverence and awestruck lust. No words were needed as you gazed at each other's swollen lips and tousled hair - you both knew everything had irreversibly changed in the most overwhelming way.

From that moment on, you and Jake were inseparable. You went from months of "what ifs" to not being able to keep your hands off each other. The slightest brush or heated look was enough to have you desperate to jump his bones at any opportunity.

For Jake, it was like a dream come true after pining from afar for so long. Finally being able to worship every perfect inch of you, to tangle his body with yours, to drink in your breathy moans and whimpers...he never wanted this haze to end.

You were both entirely drunk on each other, drowning in the depths of your smoldering passion. Any lingering fears or heartache you had were washed away by the passionate intensity Jake craved you with, how eternal his devotion felt.

Of course, such a whirlwind romance wasn't without ruffling some feathers. About two months into your torrid new relationship, you crossed paths with your ex at a local bar while out with friends.

"Well, well..." the snide voice called out as soon as they spotted you. "If it isn't my favorite dumped loser found someone newer, dumber, and even more desperate to settle for less."

You instinctively shrank back, feeling that old sense of shame and hurt bubble up despite Jake's arm protectively wrapped around you. But this time, you didn't have to face that menace alone.

Jake immediately stepped forward, jaw clenched as he attempted to keep his fury in check. "Why don't you do yourself a favor and get the hell out of here before I make you," he warned in a low, dangerous tone.

Your ex only scoffed, clearly finding amusement in watching Jake's anger boiling over. With a drunken saunter, they closed the gap between you, keeping their gaze locked on yours.

"Don't forget, I know you better than this sad rebound ever will," they taunted with a cruel smirk. "I know all the filthy little things that got you--"

Whatever nasty comment they hoped to sling next was cut off by Jake's hand violently shoving them backwards. Your ex's dumbfounded shock soon dissolved into equal rage as they came charging back at Jake, grabbing him by the collar as the two began exchanging shoves.

"Hey, hey! Break it up!" your other friends tried jumping in to separate the heated tussle, but not before your ex landed a hard punch square on Jake's cheekbone.

That was the final straw. Like some primal switch being flipped, Jake totally snapped. With a feral growl, he tackled your ex to the ground, taking a few more solid hits as the two rolled around in furious punches and choke holds.

"Jake! Oh my god, stop!" you cried out in horror, watching helplessly.

It wasn't until a handful of bouncers finally broke through to pull them apart that the violence ceased. Jake was dragged out back by a couple of the burly guards, clothes disheveled and sporting a split lip while the other patrons sneered at your ex being dragged out as well.

Your heart was still racing from the adrenaline and shock as you rushed out the back exit after Jake. He was leaning against the wall, chest heaving and knuckles bleeding from the brawl.

"Jake! Are you okay?" you rushed over, cradling his face to inspect the damage. He hissed at the contact against his wounded skin before melting into your touch with a heavy exhale.

Those stormy irises locked onto yours, slightly glazed but burning with pure longing and possession. "I'm so sorry, baby...I just..." he rasped, voice dripping with unrestrained desire. "I just couldn't stand the thought of that piece of shit being anywhere near you, talking to you that way..."

One of his hands slid up to tangle desperately in your hair while the other snaked around your lower back, pulling your hips flush against his hardening length. "You're mine now," he growled before capturing your mouth in a torrid, demanding kiss.

You opened for him with a heady whimper, the thrill of claiming this smoldering, dominant side of Jake setting your blood on fire. His tongue invaded greedily as he walked you backwards, pinning you against the wall with his body weighing deliciously against you.

~~~~~

Any care for location or being seen was abandoned as Jake's arousal ground shamelessly against your core, his big hands gripping and roaming with reckless possession. You gave back as good as you got - raking nails down his back, nipping at his full lips with moans muffled between heated clashes of tongue and teeth.

Just as the frenzied make-out was reaching a fever pitch, a loud clatter from behind the dumpster nearby caused you both to jump apart, chests heaving. Jake's eyes bored into yours, still glazed with lust but now mixed with frustration at the interruption.

"Get in the car," he rasped in a low rumble, grabbing your hand and pulling you towards the parking lot. "We're going somewhere more private."

You eagerly followed, legs still wobbly from the dizzying heat coursing through you. The ride to Jake's apartment felt like an agonizing eternity with how badly you were both aching to crash together again. He kept one hand firmly planted on your thigh, thumb tracing maddening circles that had you squirming.

The second you crossed the threshold into his place, Jake pinned you against the door, claiming your lips in another heated, desperate clash. You melted into him as his talented fingers quickly divested you of your dress, palms roaming every newly exposed inch of skin.

You fumbled with his belt and jeans as he attacked the sensitive spots along your neck and collarbone with a trail of opened-mouth kisses. Each graze of his teeth and insistent suckle from those full lips had you whimpering in delirious need.

Somehow you managed to get Jake's pants undone, allowing his thick hardness to spring free as he kicked them off along with his shoes. You drank in a shuddering breath at the glorious sight of his arousal, already leaking with need for you.

Jake's heated gaze followed yours, a prideful smirk tugging at his swollen lips. "You like what you see, baby?" he rumbled, giving himself a slow, teasing stroke.

You bit your lip with a tiny nod, unable to tear your eyes away. That only made his cocky grin widen further as he leaned in close, beard tantalizingly scratching your jaw.

"I'm going to make you feel so good, make you remember that you belong only to me" he murmured, the deep timbre of his gravelly desire sending shivers straight to your core. "Let me worship every perfect inch of you, nice and slow..."

As if to emphasize his point, Jake trailed a series of torturously unhurried open-mouthed kisses down your neck and chest again before dropping to his knees. His smoldering gaze remained locked on yours as his fingers hooked into your soaked underwear and slowly dragged them down your trembling legs.

You were bare before him now, glistening arousal fully exposed to his ravenous stare. Jake's hands roamed back up the smooth skin of your thighs, close to your throbbing center yet making no move to provide relief just yet.

"Such a gorgeous sight..." he husked in reverence. "All mine."

Unable to take any more teasing, you carded your fingers through his thick locks as his lips ghosted nearer to your pussy. "Please, Jake..." you mewled desperately.

That was all the encouragement he needed before diving in. You cried out at the first swipe of Jake's talented tongue, back arching against the door as waves of electric pleasure flooded through you...

He was relentless, sucking harder and deeper, plundering your wet folds until his tongue was completely coated with your slick essence. You gasped loudly with an intense wave of pleasure, leaving you breathless and panting.

The rhythmic motion driving you insane until you suddenly broke down into violent, uncontrolled moans of ecstasy. It was over too soon though as Jake pulled away, sitting back on his heels with a self satisfied smile and dark eyes glittering.

He carefully took the wet, limp package in his large hand and gently stroked your slick slit. "You're gonna be so fucking ready for me tonight, sweetheart," he assured huskily. "Trust me. There's nothing you could possibly do that would turn me off."

And then he lowered himself over you, spreading the moisture around, filling you with such potent satisfaction that you almost screamed in bliss. Your legs wrapped themselves around his waist as Jake sank slowly and surely down until he could bury himself inside you easily. As he started slowly moving, you gripped his shoulders tightly with your thighs, your entire body tensing and relaxing under his weight. His hands tightened around your arms and shoulders to make sure you weren't trying to crawl away. He held still, letting your body adjust itself to his thickness until the feeling started to fade. As your legs relaxed, they found a more comfortable place to rest, and your stomach felt better about being full. After you got used to being filled up, he reached down to gently cup your tit in one large hand as he pressed himself even deeper, burying himself within you with one hard thrust. His long fingers caressed your soft skin, drawing groans from your lips with every flick of his finger.

With the most powerful thrusts, Jake filled you completely in one go, filling you entirely and filling every single space. For a moment it seemed like there wouldn't be enough room anymore in your womb; you'd never been so far gone before with anyone else, but Jake made that possible by holding you so close and filling you so much you couldn't get enough of each other.

You held tight to his muscular back, digging your heels into the mattress as he pounded into you with a relentless rhythm, your walls clenching down on his rigid shaft with a fierce, hungry grip. He let out a feral growl of satisfaction as you writhed beneath him, grinding yourself against him faster and quicker, begging for release. Your whole body shook with pent up passion, the need to come crashing down on you like a tsunami.

With a sharp jerk, he suddenly stiffened underneath you, causing you to cry out. His breathing became labored as your pussy clenched around his girth with unrelenting intensity. You didn't think you'd ever seen his face contort in agony quite like that before. You both took a deep breath at the same time and released it in unison as he let you cum around his dick. His cock twitched inside of you, but you didn't want to break eye contact; he was still so intent on looking at you. Your hands reached up to run through his hair again, and he bent down to kiss you gently as you both enjoyed each other's company. Then it was over in an instant as he came with a deep grunt breaking the kiss, body shaking with the force of his release, painting his white masterpiece on your walls as he slumped forward, resting his forehead heavily against your naked belly with hot tears streaming down his flushed cheeks.

“I will not let him bother you ever again”

[doitforbangchan]

sorry if it's a little long. I love to come up with plots more than the smut part

you were just supposed to meet them backstage after a concert and get a picture. but hyunjin was obviously interested so chan asked you to stay behind, offering to drop you off since you were there alone. while they were waiting for the fans to leave, hyunjin kept talking to you and managed to get you to accept going with them to the dorms with them to chill after the concert. not the type to be able to say no easily, you accepted. you ended up drinking with them. the members tried making conversations but a tipsy hyunjin was doing all he could to keep your attention on him. after a while, the others left to sleep and since it was too late for you to go home, you had to stay over. hyunjin wanted you to sleep on his bed so you'd be comfortable and he'd be in the living room but it didn't seem fair to him. that's how you ended up in the same bed. the two of you were just talking at first but as you sobered up, things escalated between the two of you...

After party - Hyunjin

Masterlist

Idol!Hyunjin x Fan!Reader (Afab)

The pics are formatting weird and I dont know why :(

CW: Light smut, kissing, grinding, thigh riding, drinking, softdom!Hyunjin, sub!reader, cursing, anxiety (Lemme know if i missed any) Not proofread :) to my requester- I hope you enjoy please let me know what you think lovey &lt;3

WC: 2.4k

Hyunjin was enamored by you. The second you walked backstage for your VIP picture with the group he knew he was doomed. Not only were you beautiful but so kind. You were all smiles as you greeted them each, handing them each little figures you had created for them of their Skzoo animals.

For you, this was the greatest thing to ever happen to you. You had waited so long for this, counting down the days since purchasing your ticket and backstage pass. You only expected it to be a quick meeting, get a picture maybe a hug and then be on your way. You were honestly shocked when Bangchan had invited you to hang out with them for a while.

"Did you come alone?" Chan had asked you when he noticed nobody was with you.

"Yeah, I did." You answered sheepishly, "I don't have any other friends into K-pop so I'm pretty used to attending events and concerts alone."

"It just means you have good taste." Hyunjin winked at you, and you felt the heat rush to your face as you mumbled a 'thanks'.

Hyunjin was sat next to you with his arm slung over the back of the couch you were both sitting on but he wasn't touching you. He just wanted to be close to you without being weird.

The two of you sat there for over an hour as he asked you questions about yourself, of course the other boys would chime in every now and again but generally they liked watching Hyunjin try and be cool with you. It was entertaining.

It was nearing closing for the venue and they had to leave soon, but Hyunjin didn't want this to end. He looked to Chan for a quick second with pleading eyes before he looked back at you and blurted "Do you wanna come home with us?"

You were thrown off by his sudden inquiry, "Huh?"

"Not in a gross way!" He panicked as Jisung burst into laughter watching his friend struggle. "I mean, we're headed back to our dorm and we planned on having a few drinks and hanging out. Our version of an after party. Would you like to join us?"

"Oh uhhh" you looked around at the encouraging looks from Felix and Chan, ignoring the snickering from Jisung and Seungmin. "I mean, I guess if you want me too, maybe an hour or so wouldn't hurt." You were a people pleaser and couldn't say no on a regular day, but especially not when your favorite idol asks you too.

"Perfect" He smiled brightly.

The ride over was more luxury than you were used too, even being shoved into the back of the black SUV. Perspective really was everything huh?

Once back at the dorms the boys wasted no time in getting acquainted with the bottle of tequila Minho had slyly taken from the venue. Though you kindly refused to do shots, you couldn't say no when Felix offered you a mixed drink he made you with some juice from the fridge.

Time felt like it was flying by. Before you knew it, it was nearing midnight. It was easy to loose track of time, though. Since the moment you got here Hyunjin had take it upon himself to keep you company. He had only taken two shots but he was clearly tipsy; his mild slurring and glassy eyes being a dead giveaway.

Not that you were any better, being a lightweight yourself. That's probably why it took you so long to notice the latening time.

"Shit" you cursed after checking your phone, only now noticing how late it was. "It's getting really late, I think I gotta head out."

Hyunjin looked around and noticed you two were the only ones left in the living room, the other members seemingly having gone to bed or to their own dorms. "Damn, how did we not notice how late it was?" He knew exactly how he didn't notice. You were too mesmerizing for him to want to pay attention to anything else.

"I should probably try to call an Uber." You sighed, opening your phone and praying you could get an available ride. Most Saturday nights were impossible to get a ride, since it seemed like the whole city tried to get one at the same time.

Hyunjin spoke before his brain could catch up. "Sleep in my bed tonight." He backtracked at seeing your eyes widen at his proposition. "Uhh what I mean is, it's really late and getting a ride might take hours anyway, so you could just stay here tonight if you wanted.."

"Oh umm." You bit your lip, nervously. "I don't want to be an inconvenience for you."

He shook his head in disagreement, shaggy hair bouncing at his vehement action. "It's no inconvenience, hon. Really, it would even make me feel better knowing you were here safe instead of waiting for a rando or walking home in the middle of the night."

"Aren't you kind of a rando, Hyunjin?" You had a slight tease to your voice.

"A rando who you came home with, yeah." He giggles, standing up and putting his hand out for you to take. He looked at you expectantly when you hesitated to grab his hand in return. "Come on, y/n. You can take my bed and I'll take the couch tonight. No objections!"

You shyly took his hand in yours, giving up on trying to leave knowing he was right.

You found yourself unable to sleep. It has easily been 40 minutes since Hyunjin had made his bed for you and wished you goodnight, and you couldn't stop thinking of just how you ended up in this situation.

You only meant to get a picture with your favorite K-pop group- nothing more nothing less. It's what you had paid for, at least. Never in your life would you have imagined this is where you would be at the end of the night. In Hwang Hyunjins bed. The sheets smelled of him, the silk holding onto both his natural scent and traces of his expensive cologne. Honestly it was quite sobering, your buzz fading by the minute.

As if his ears were ringing, the bedroom door slowly creaks open to reveal Hyunjin, peeking in curiously. The only light in the room was the soft glow of the moon shining through his window. It was just enough for him to be able to make out your still figure in his bed.

"Pssst" his voice was a whisper, "are you awake?" He didn't want to wake you if you were sleeping so he kept his tone low.

"Yeah." You whispered back, equally as soft. "Are you ok?"

He shuffled close to you in the room, "Uh yeah, it's just that.. the couch is really uncomfortable."

"Oh, uh" You stammed, "I can go to the couch so you can have your bed back."

You went to remove yourself from his bed but he stopped you, his hand finding your shoulder to keep you in place, "Well I was thinking, if you didn't mind, I could just stay in here with you."

You blinked in surprise, contemplating it for a moment. He wasn't slurring his speech anymore so you knew his tipsiness was wearing off. " I guess that would be ok." You slowly scooted further into the bed, giving him space to climb under the covers with you.

He situated himself under the warm blankets and turned his body to face you. Now you were both looking at each other through the dim light.

"I do appreciate you coming and hanging out with us tonight." He breathed out, breaching the silence.

You balked, "Are you kidding? You brought me into your home, and now you're letting me in your bed! This whole night has been incredible, really. I should be the one thanking you." You said in a hushed tone, fighting back the urge to word vomit your appreciation.

Hyunjin chucked, "No need to thank me." He closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep breath, gathering his nerves. "If I'm being honest, something about you had immediately caught my attention the second you walked backstage to meet us. You were so... Captivating. And sweet. Those little Skzoo minis you made for us are so cute and I can tell you took your time to make them for us. I knew I wanted to know you more." He reached for your hand in the dark and you tentatively let him grab it and laced your fingers together.

Your face was burning hot at his confession. Honestly you were at a loss for words. You hadn't considered yourself special in anyway. Sweet- maybe. But captivating? Never. It was a whirlwind of emotions. You didn't doubt that he was speaking his truth, more so your heart didn't want to believe it.

As if sensing your inner turmoil he gave you a shy grin to ease your mind, "I understand if you don't feel the same. I know it's crazy to spring that kind of thing on someone you just met."

"No its not that!" You protested louder than intended, before sheepishly lowering your voice back to a whisper. " This is all very surreal to me, right now. This isn't how I imagined my night would be, but I am so glad it did. I really liked getting to know you guys, especially you... Who may or may not be my bias." You hid your eyes behind your hand.

You tried to tug your other hand from his grasp but he held on, tighter now after your confession.

"Oh, I'm your bias, huh?" You could hear the smirk on his face as his confidence grew exponentially. You turned your head at buried it into the pillow, unable to meet his gaze.

"Don't be mean." you mumbled.

"I would never dream of being mean to you, sweetheart. You're the one who can't even look at your bias. So really you're the mean one here, angel."

You took a peek at him to see his signature pout gracing his features, the dumpling shape of his lips making you want to bite them.

"You're lucky you're pretty" You huffed, feeling his other hand reach for your waist and pull you closer. You held back a squeal at his action.

"You think I'm pretty?" He abandoned his pout for a boyish grin.

"Mhm" you responded, so quietly he almost missed it.

"Well, between you and me, angel," He leaned in closer to your face, eyes flickering back and forth between your lips and eyes, "I think you're prettier."

The singer left you room to deny his advances, but when you made no move to get away he gently pressed his soft lips against your own. You felt your eyes close on impact, and sighed into him as he swept his tongue along your bottom lip, asking for entrance. Once you parted for him and allowed him entry into your mouth he let out a low moan; the sound coming from somewhere in the back of his throat.

You fisted his shirt when he let go of your hand, instead his found purchase cupping your cheeks as he deepened the kiss even further. His body pressed as close to you as he could get, letting himself get drunk on your taste as he sobered from the alcohol.

You whimpered when he wedged one of his thighs between yours, the strong muscle creating a friction on your clothes center.

"Mm I liked that sound. I wanna hear you sing more pretty melodies for me, angel." He retracted his lips from yours, choosing to instead pepper smooches down your neck. He ground his thigh into you, eliciting another whimper.

Hyunjin sucked a mark onto your flesh, the extra stimulation causing you to buck your hips, seeking more. "Hyuuunnee"

"That's it baby, ride my thigh. Fuck, I can feel you soaking through both of our clothes, angel." He really means his clothes, as he had given you a pair of sleep shorts to wear. He sped up his movements, the grinding getting harsher against your core.

Your clit was rubbing so deliciously against your panties, and you definitely knew with how much you were dripping for him that he was telling the truth. You couldn't believe how worked up you were getting, already on the verge of cumming and you hadn't even been really touched yet.

His hand traveled down to the hem of your shirt, and he pushed it up to reveal your braless chest. He let out a groan of his own at the sight. "You not wear a bra for me, angel? Being a naughty girl?"

You moaned when he latched his mouth onto the skin of your tit, "Mmmmm, no Hyun. Jus' can't sleep in it." one of your hands found his hair.

"I don't think that's true, angel." He said it between nips to your flesh, "I think you wanted me to come in here and ravish you." He nipped particularly hard and you gasped. "Bet you were laying here, soaking in your panties waiting for me, huh?" He switched to your other breast.

Your panting was getting harsher, getting closer and closer to cumming on his thigh. "Hyune, m' gonna..gonna..."

"Gonna cum, pretty girl? Gonna make a mess for me, hmm?" You nodded as best you could, "Go ahead, angel. Hyun's got you." At his permission you let go, a soft cry escaping you as you shook against him. The whole time he kept steady in his grinding, working you through your orgasm. "Fuck, you're even prettier when you cum, oh my god. Prettier than a painting."

When the shocks of pleasure faded into over stimulation you tried to give him a light push to signal him to stop. He took the hint and slowly ended his grinding. Your breathing was heavy and your pupils were blown wide, the sight enough for him to crave you even more if that was possible.

Keeping eye contact with you, he gingerly reached into the front of your (his) shorts, his long fingers finding your dripping wetness and collecting some of it onto the pads of his fingers. You bleated a moan at the contact of him sweeping through your wet folds.

You almost came again when Hyunjin removed his fingers from your pussy and brought the shiny digits up to his mouth. He groaned and his eyes rolled to the back of his head when he sucked your essence off his skin.

"Fuck angel, you really are sweet." He was quick to flip you onto your back, causing you to squeal. "Gotta be quiet, sweet girl." He scooted down your body, pulling your bottoms and panties down with him. "Can't have the boys coming in here while I'm eating my new favorite treat, right angel?"

A/n: Yesssss I know its not full smut, but honestly i liked the it this way. i think it fits better :) I hope you enjoy please let me know if you did

Comments and reblogs are very much appreciated!

©doitforbangchan

[luvyeni]

❛A VERY HAPPY ENDING❜ ( l. felix )

p. masseuse!felix x fem!reader w. 2.3k

warnings? fingering, boob play, oral ( f. receiving ), uprotected sex, cum eating

— 𖦹 ( you're in need of a break and to relax, so your friend makes you a well needed reservation at a massage parlor ) !

authors note. i suddenly remember when felix would go around and give people massages and i came up with this, so enjoy 😁.

“Jesus yn, what the hell happened in here?” your roommate entered your room. “it’s like a tornado hit your room; did this, left — spun the block and hit it again.” She said, stepping over the pile of clothes on the floor to your bed. “im sorry I didn’t have enough time this week to clean, too busy at work.”

“looks like you didn’t have the time to do your hair and anything else, you look like a hobo.” You clicked away at your keyboard, rolling your eyes. “did you come in here to insult me?” you questioned. “cause that could’ve been a text.”

“I came in here to tell you that you need to take a break, you’re working yourself to death.” She voiced her concerns. “im fine.” You said. “baby no you not and that’s okay, we can fix that cause you can’t keep living like this.” She was right, — your job had recently had layoffs and you and the rest of the people that were spared were worked to the bone to replace the missing people; which meant more work and long hours, so you didn’t have much time to do anything.

“living like what?” you turned in your chair. “babe when was the last time you had any me time?” you shrugged. “maybe about a month ago, I think.” She sighed. “exactly you need to relax, that’s why as your roommate and the bestest friend in the world, I took the liberty of scheduling us both for a massage at my favorite masseuse parlor this weekend.”

“I don’t have time this weekend there’s a— nope I don’t want to hear it.” She covered her ears. “you’re gonna put the laptop down this weekend and go out and have some relaxation time.” She said. “even if I have to drag you out myself.”

You sighed, knowing your friends wouldn’t back down unless you agreed. “fine we’ll go.” She clapped, standing up. “great!” she chipped. “its gonna be great, I swear you’ll feel like a new woman after this.” She said hugging you; before making her way to the door, looking around the room once more. “and maybe then you’ll come to your senses and clean this pigsty.” She scrunched her nose up in disgust before leaving out.

The next few days were busy and finally Friday rolled around and the weekend was finally here. That evening you got home and your friend was already going at your room claiming ‘we need to get this together before we become new women.” You sighed, dropping your bag; changing your clothes before you also jumped in and you tackled the crazy that was your room; you both finished; covered in sweat from the deep clean. “girl you better be paying me fore that.” Your friend huffed. “I worked like a damn dog.”

“thank you.” You said, ready to take a shower and hop into bed. “no problems girl.” Your friend hopped up. “now get some sleep cause our girls day starts at 10:30 am sharp.” She skipped out her room. “and make sure to tidy up down there.” She pointed to your below area. “why do I need to do that?” you crossed your legs. “just listen to me, and do it goodnight.”

“is it noticeable.” You said looking down; had it been a long time? “no.” you scoffed getting your pajamas ready. “shes crazy.” You said, thinking for a minute. “well it couldn’t hurt anyone.” You grabbed a new razor from your nightstand before making your way into the bathroom.

The next day you a woken feeling a little bit more refreshed than usual; sleeping in a little later than normal and in a clean room really was nice. You woke up, getting ready for the day with your roommate.

You spent the whole morning and early afternoon out with your roommate; getting your hair and nails done, shopping for new clothes and other things for the apartment. It was almost time for you both to head over to the massage place; so you stopped for lunch then headed right over.

“we’re here.” She pulled into the parking lot. “it even looks fancy outside.” You stepped out of the car. “I booked our appointments for a least busy time so it should be empty so we won’t have to wait long.” You both walked into the place, standing at the front desk. “hello?” you friend tapped the bells and a boy came scurrying out.

“hello, welcome to our day spa, do you both have a appointment?” he said. “yes we do its under (f/l/n).” he typed down on the computer, your friend turned to you mouthing ‘he’s cute’ to which you shook your head at her antics.

“oh here it is.” He laughed after struggling to find it. “which one of you is scheduled for felix and which one of you is scheduled for changbin?” you turned to your friend. “does it matter?” she nodded. “changbin is much muscular and he hits all the right places “ you furrowed your eye brows. “you seem to know a lot about this place.”

“if I may?” the man in front of you said. “felix is very good too, he’s the most popular here, everyone always asks for him.” You nod, well if he’s good that’s all that matters, anyway a massage is a massage. “okay.”

He guided you both to two different rooms. “you can go in there and you there, they both should be here soon so you can get undressed and wait.” He walked away. “undressed?” you turned to your friend. “yeah you have to fully be undressed.” She said. “is that why you told me to shave?” she winked, walking into her room shutting the door. “crazy.” You walked into your room closing the door.

You stripped down to your underwear, taking the towel, wrapping it around your waist, pulling your panties down your leg, sitting them down on your pile of clothes — just as the door opened, making you jump, covering your chest. “oh im sorry I thought you’d be laying down already.” He said. “its okay.” You said. “I was just finishing up.”

“well you can lay down now and we can start.” He dimmed the lights. “I can light candles if you want.” You smiled, nodding. “thank you.” You laid down, your boobs hitting the cold leather, making you hiss at the sensation. “you okay?” felix finished lightning the last candle. “y-yes im fine.” You felt your face heat up that he heard that noise. “okay we can get started now.”

You rested your head on your arms; you felt a warm liquid hit your back, making you flinch. “is it too hot?” you shook your head. “just shocked me a little.” You heard him chuckle. “don’t be scared, its just eucalyptus and peppermint oil.” He explained, you felt him rubbing it along your back, you sighed at his touch. “it helps with inflammation and pain.”

The boy in the front was right; he was a godsend with his hands, it’s like he knew you like the back of his hand, hitting all the right places, your body slowly began to relax. “you seem so tense, do you work a lot?” he asked. You hummed. “its not good to work like that, too much stress can cause a lot of knots and that causes pain.” He pressed down on one spot that made your eyes shoot open; a low whimper coming out of your mouth.

“oh , im sorry.” You cursed at yourself, embarrassed at how it just slipped out. “that’s good, it means I’m doing a good job.” He said. “don’t be embarrassed.” He said in a low soft tone, his deep voice sending a wave of arousal in your gut. “let out all the noises you want.”

His hands moved to your side, rubbing them gently; making his way up to the side of your boobs. “is this okay?” you hummed, pretty sure at this point you’d let him do whatever he wanted as long as he kept talking to you like that.

His hands rubbed the sides of your bust gently, you bit your lip to contain any noises that tried to force their way out. “you don’t have to hide them.” He said. “I want to hear them.” You couldn’t for the life of you wrap your head around why this stranger has such an effect on you; but you didn’t stop the next noise that came out of your mouth. “fu-fuck.”

He worked down your back, right above your ass, where the towel covered, pressing down. “its seems really tense here.” He pressed down harder, you whimpered. He worked down to your legs, pushing the towel to sit right above your thighs. He poured some more warm oil on your legs, rubbing your calves, making his way up to your thighs — dangerously close to your bare bottom.

Felix never would’ve done this with another client; he would’ve stopped right at your back — but he couldn’t help it, you were making so much noise and he had to admit; it was turning him on, a lot — and he wanted to see how far he could go.

His hands were entering dangerous territory as he rubbed the in of your thighs, you could feel the heat of his fingers on your cunt, he could easily touch it if he wanted — and you really wanted him to.

It’s like he read your mind cause his next words made your heart race. “if you want me to touch you, you have to say something.” He said. “I wont do anything you don’t want me to.” He said. “i-I want you to.” You said breathlessly. “then turn around.”

You turned on your back, his hands work all the back up to your boobs, gently cupping them; you let out a soft moan. “let me hear you.” He pinched your bud, your back arched up; giving him the leeway to undo the towel, your bare cunt for him to see — thank god you shaved. “so pretty.” His hands travel down to your pussy, lightly touching it. “pl-please.”

“you want me to touch you?” you nodding. “ye-yes.” He smiled, his hand spreading your legs; fingers grazing your clit. “good you used your words.” He rubbed your clit, spreading your folds. “such a pretty cunt.” He whispered. “so soft.” He pushed a finger inside of you. “so wet.” He moved his fingers in and out of you, curling the to hit that gummy spot inside of you. “you gonna cum, I can feel you clenching.” He used the pad of his thumb to rub your clit. “you can cum.”

And just like that you were on his finger, moaning out loud. “so loud.” he sat on the massage table in front of your breathless naked body. “I want to hear more.” He kissed your neck, climbing on top of your body to leave little kisses down the valley of your breath, taking a nipple into his mouth as he sat on his knees in between your legs, his hard cock evident as he pressed it against your cunt.

“sh-shit.” You moaned as he grinding his hips against you, sucking on your nipples. “pl-please fuck me.” That was all he needed, before he undid his pants freeing his hard cock. “you sure you want to do this?” he said. “im a stranger and — I want this, please.” You needed this, you needed him to fuck you. “please fuck me.”

He pressed his tip against your cunt, pushing himself inside of you. “oh fuck you’re so tight.” He slowly worked himself in and out of you. “you need to relax, you’re so tense I can barely -fuck- I can barely move inside of you.” You whined as he used the pad of his thumb to rub your bud. “that’s it.” He sighed. “open up for me.”

He moved his hips fluidity, his cock hitting all the spots your vibrator just didn’t. “fe-felix.” His name flowing right out of your mouth as he worked his way in and out of you. “fe-feels so good.” He moved faster, you felt your orgasm approaching. “im gonna cum.” Your voice was shaky as your clenched tightly around him.

“fuck me too.” He grunted, he moving faster. “felix im cumming.” You gasped, the knot in your stomach snapping as you came. “shit you’re too tight.” He moaned, his orgasm approaching quickly. “shit.” He pulled out as fast as he could, cumming all over your cunt. “fuck.”

“one more.” He said, his face near your cunt. “I want to give you one more.” He licked your folds, the taste of your cunt and his cum on his tongue was dizzying. “fu-fuck.” You were feeling overstimulated at the point, but you still felt your third orgasm approaching fast. “oh fuck.” You gasped. “fuck im gonna cum!” thinking he was gonna move away, but he didn’t he stayed there drinking up all you have to offer. “fe-felix.” You had to push his head away to keep him from going on.

He pulled away, wiping his mouth; your body was fully relaxed by now; the service time was probably long over. “shit my boss is gonna kill me.” He quickly redressed himself, helping you get dressed. “that sounded harsh, I really liked it.” He said, you laughed, pulling your shirt down. “I understand, my friend has probably called me a thousand times.” You pulled out your phone, and believe it or not there were no phone calls from her, but two text messages.

(friends name)🩷| I told you you’d like him…

(friends name)🩷| have fun girl, I’ll wait in the car😉

Your face burned with embarrassment. “I would like to see you again.” He said. “me-me?” he nodded. “yes, if that’s okay.” You nodded. “I would love to see you again.” He smiled, as you gave him your number. “lets see each other soon.” He nodded. “is the weekend coming up okay?” he wanted to see you as soon as he could — he needed to. “We can get dinner and maybe see a movie.” He moved closer to you, caging you against the bed a smirk on his face.

“and I can give you a even better happy ending than today, only if you’re good though.”

©️LUVYENI

[outro-jo]

kissing skz goodbye

pairing: skz x reader

type: reaction

warnings: none

a/n: please read info before requesting update: if you saw that pic of felix before, no you didn’t. upon further investigation that was not even felix and pinterest has done me dirty. this is why we don’t look for photos and post at like 1am 🙃

masterlist | info

——————————

chan- it’s amazing chis was even asleep but he was and you know that if you left before him and didn’t kiss him that he’d pout about it all day. did he jump a little? yes but he melted right into your lips in no time. he let out a groan, his voice still raspy with sleep. his arms wrapped around your waist and because he was so much stronger than you, your body fell right into his.

“i’m not gonna let you go just yet.”

lee know- this was purely to annoy him. he HATES being woken up but nonetheless you had to do your job as a partner. you gave several pecks in a row, lingering longer on the last one. to your surprise a hand came up to the back of your head and the kiss was deepened. 

“do this again and i’ll kill you.”

changbin- will also pout if he doesn’t get a kiss before you go to work. you’ll get texts throughout the day teasing that you don’t love him and how could he possibly be with someone so cruel. so to save yourself the headache on such a busy day, you leaned down and gave him a gentle kiss on his cheek. as you turned to walk out, a hand caught yours at the last second and you heard him whine.

“nooo, kiss me properly, baby.”

hyunjin- kisses were spread all throughout your morning routine. when you first opened your eyes and rolled over, you brushed his hair back to admire his beautiful features in sleep before softly kissing them. then a quick peck after your shower on your way to change. lastly, a long kiss to his lips that finally causes him to stir and then return the kiss.

“have a good day, my love.”

han- you know better than to leave a room let alone the house without kissing your boyfriend goodbye. your kisses are like a drug to him and he can’t go more than a few hours without begging for them. you give him a kiss to each cheek to wake him slightly, gently letting him know what’s coming next. his lips poke out while his eyes are still closed. letting you know he’s ready for you and you lean down once more, giving him a final kiss before you have to go.

“i love you, baby.”

felix- lix is so stunning when he sleeps. his bare face littered with freckles and relaxed features looking younger in sleep. you almost hate to wake him up even a little but you can’t help but to kiss him before you leave. not only would he be upset if you didn’t but your heart would ache without one last kiss. your hand rests on his cheek, stroking it with your thumb as you lean down. felix isn’t scared or even fazed by your affections. instead he kisses you right back and reaches up to keep you in place for a little longer. 

“such a perfect way to wake up.”

seungmin- sleep is such a precious thing to seungmin but if he was honest, you’re even more precious. the first time you left for work before he was up, you got to hear about it when you got home that evening. he wasn’t really sulking or anything, but was just talking about your absence like it was fact. you got the idea. from then on you remembered to kiss him goodbye. the room was still dark as the curtains were drawn and you leaned over him, pushing his hair off his forehead before kissing his lips. you felt him smile before kissing you back.

“bye, darling.”

jeongin- though he can sleep though anything, jeongin still knows when you leave without kissing him. you joke that it’s like kissing a mannequin but he insist you do it anyways. this morning was a little different because he had just returned home from tour and wanted to savor every moment he could with you. it surprised you when his lips moved against yours and his hand came up to caress your cheek. his nose nuzzling yours as your lips parted to still keep you close to him. 

“i’ve missed this.”

[dearestaussiechannie]

♡ Giggle Box ♡ — Bang Chan

word count: 1.3k paring: Chan x reader genre: fluff warnings: gender not specified!reader, established relationship, mentions other members, heavy fluff, comfort, if I left anything out lmk Authors note: This was inspired by a tweet that I saw that said "the most devastating thing about being a Chan stan is living with the knowledge that he probably giggles into kisses." and I took that PERSONALLY. So, from one Chan stan to another, stay strong.

You'd been out with your boyfriend and his friends all day so there wasn't really much of a chance for you and Chan to be “intimate”. The most physical contact the two of you had shared throughout the day was mostly side hugs, laying his head on your shoulder, brushing his hand against yours or just simple things like wiping something off of his face. It was starting to drive you absolutely insane. No Chan kisses? All day? Were you suddenly placed in jail?

Currently, you're all at lunch. Some random place that Felix had picked out that he saw while he was out alone the other day. Everyone was talking with Minho and Han bickering about something, Seungmin and I.N trying to figure out when they wanted to eat, Felix was showing Changbin the new things he'd gotten on Genshin, which just left you and Chan in what felt like your own little world.

You were looking over the menu, humming softly to yourself when you felt something brush against your leg. Looking down, you could see his leg pressed against yours and his fingers gently playing with the strings in the holes of your ripped pants. Since you didn't think much of it, you slowly shifted your attention back to the menu. Once you do though, you miss the sight of him starting to pout.

Some time has now gone by, all of the boys around you now much quieter than before as they were eating. Some still held conversations, the topic had shifted to the food, occasionally feeding your opinion in as well. Chan on the other hand, he's being extremely quiet. You try your best to include him in the conversation but he would just look at you, agree to whatever you had said before going back to his food. While doing this though, his fingers kept playing with the strings.

Once lunch was over and everyone was safely back to the dorms, everyone decided to part ways for a little while and get some work done or do whatever they wanted. This meant you were finally alone with Chan but he also wanted to get some work done so he buried himself into his laptop. You really did admire him for his dedication to his music, if there was a track that needed anything done, he was the first person to try to fix it. Constant late nights of him making an entire beat from scratch just for him to have lyrics ready the next day was amazing.

This time however, his attention wasn't fully there. The sounds of his fingers against the keys of his laptop, small sounds escaping his headphones when he would adjust them or the chair creaking as he swiveled in it were filling the room as you laid on his bed, humming softly to yourself. You looked away from your phone for a moment to check on him, shocked when your eyes were met by his, only for him to look away as soon as you'd caught him. Deciding to brush it off, you walk over and put a fresh bottle of water on his desk, kissing his cheek. 

Once you're turned to walk back over to his bed, you hear a small giggle. The way a simple sound can make a smile creep onto your face is astonishing. Crawling back into the bed, you look in his direction only to be met by those big brown eyes again just from them to rip away. “Channie? Is everything alright?” You ask him, a little concerned since he wasn’t focused like he usually would be, but a simple nod is all you get as a response.

An hour has now passed and you are currently sitting beside him at his desk as you read over the lyrics that he's written since he'd asked you to look over them and see if there is any better wording way that could flow smoother. When he needs help with this, you're usually the first person he asks so that he doesn't have to bother Minho or Han. His head was currently resting against your shoulder, taking in deep breaths as if he were trying to inhale you. “You could change this, I think it might flow smoother.” you tell him, using the pink pen he always gives you when he needs your help so that he can differentiate who wrote what better when he's letting others read over it as well.

You go through and put small hearts by certain parts that you think are good and he shouldn't change, making him giggle again when he pulls away to look at his notebook. There's that sound again, the one that makes all of the butterflies on earth suddenly race into your stomach. You look over at him, seeing a smile on his face and his fingers tracing over the little hearts you've drawn for him before suddenly kissing his cheek. There it is again, you can't help your next movements, wanting to hear more. Quickly, you turn his chair to face you, looking over his face for a moment before you start pressing your lips all over his face. Not a spot left untouched less than once, you kiss both his cheeks, the tip and bridge of his nose, his forehead, temples and chin, repeating over and over as his giggle turns into a full laugh. Now, you can't help but laugh with him, holding tightly onto his shoulders.

“You're so cute I swear I could just eat you up! Your rosy cheeks, your nose, your soft lips, your head where that big brain of yours calls home.. All of it. You're so handsome it kills me!” You say to him, hand clutching your chest while watching as his cheeks turn from a soft rose color to a shade of red. His hands quickly try to hide his face, but you're faster. Your hands land on his and bring them into yours, locking your fingers as you keep kissing his face, leaving out his lips on purpose.

This goes on for a few minutes until you're both laughing so hard your stomachs hurt. You both calm down for a moment before he's looking at you with a pout, hands holding onto yours tightly. “You um.. said my lips but you haven't kissed them once since we've been home…” His words come out as a whisper, unsure if he wanted you to hear them. This makes you lean closer to him, looking him in the eyes before glancing down at his lips.

“Oh.. you mean the soft pink ones in front of me right now?” Your question making him nervous for some reason, as if he's never kissed you before even though you have over a hundred times by now. All he can answer you with is a nod before you lean in and gently kiss him hearing him giggle, “I” another kiss and giggle, “Love” another, “you” another “SO much!” you say giving him a final kiss. He looks at you, eyes squinted from how big he's smiling before pulling you into a tight hug, feeling so lucky to have someone like you by his side. 

“You know, I never realized how much I like hearing you giggle when I kiss you until now.” You say to him, drawing small circles over his knuckles, pressing your forehead against his softly. “I didn't know I did it until now, honestly.. You just make me so.. giddy..” He responds before pulling you closer to him. This makes your heart beat faster, hands resting against his chest, moving your forehead away from his so that you can look over his face with a smile. This man will forever be your giggle box and you couldn't be happier.

©️ dearestaussiechannie, all rights reserved.

Taglist: (to be added, comment or message me♡)

[sheerfreesia007]

Data Breach

Pairing: Lee Felix x Reader

Word count: 5,834

Content warnings: Fluff, suggestive

Summary: Felix is the newly promoted head of your company’s I.T. department and you’re thankful for his expertise because are not your thing. What happens when he finds your computer illiteracy absolutely adorable as he tries to teach you about the digital side of things in your company?

Felix stares wide eyed at the red headed woman who’s sporting a pair of black cat eyed glasses perched on her pretty button nose. He can’t believe what she just said to him as he’s surrounded by his coworkers, you’ve been promoted to head of the I.T. Department Mr. Lee. Pride rushes through him as a beaming smile slowly forms on his face, he’d been working so hard to get to this spot and finally he was here he never thought he’d be here but he was so ecstatic to finally achieve his dream.

”Mr. Lee, Miss Whalton would like to meet with you if you have time before you start celebrating. She’d like to introduce herself since you’ll be reporting to her now.” The woman says kindly with a soft shy smile. Felix eagerly nods his head as some of his coworkers clap him on the back before he looks to the woman to lead the way.

The walk to the elevators is quiet as the two of them both wait for the elevator once she presses the button to call it down to them. And the elevator ride is even quieter as she stands right inside the doors after presenting her keycard to the scanner that allows her to press the button for the top floor. Felix can feel his excitement and anxiety coursing through him, this is huge for him and now he’s going to be meeting Miss Whalton who’s the owner of the company that he’s been working at for the past five years. He never imagined that he’d become the head of the I.T. Department let alone meet Miss Whalton.

”What’s she like?” He suddenly asks nervously and the woman turns to him with a curiously raised brow. “M-miss Whalton, what’s she like?” He asks again as his tongue stutters slightly making him blush. The woman’s face softens and she smiles brightly at him.

”She’s a fair yet stern woman. The hardest working woman I’ve ever met. She may come off as intimidating but she’s got a big heart and she wants the best for everyone.” The woman tells him fondly as she looks down at the floor shyly. “She helped me when I was in my darkest hour and I’m eternally grateful to her for that but she doesn’t hold it over my head or mention it ever. She just always checks in on me making sure that I’m alright.” She informs and he smiles widely at her as he nods his head at the information. “She’s very impressed with your work, when it came to her decision between you and Mr. Turner you were the far better choice and she easily saw that in you. So don’t let her intimidate you.” She told him conspiratorially and Felix flushed at her praise.

”Thank you, I’ll keep that in mind when I meet her.” He said softly. He turned his head to stare at his reflection in the mirrored wall of the elevator and blanched at his disheveled state of appearance. He quickly slipped his clear framed glasses from his face before he gathered half of his hair up into a ponytail and tied it back with the black hair tie that he always had on his wrist. He checked himself out in the mirror making sure that he looked presentable before slipping his glasses back onto his face, his nerves starting to grow again as his eyes darted to the climbing numbers.

When the elevator finally came to its stop at the top floor he was escorted out and down a tiled hallway that had pretty framed artworks spaced strategically along the walls. He tried not to get distracted by the artwork as he felt his palms begin to sweat, he surreptitiously wiped them along his pant legs as the assistant began to slow as she came to the only office on the floor.

They both walked past a desk that sat in an open area before a pair of frosted double doors that were shut. Felix assumed that the desk was for the assistant and he was right as she moved around it to grab the ringing desk phone while holding up a single finger to him. He nodded awkwardly before turning and moving to one of the paintings hung on the wall opposite her desk to give her privacy on her phone call. 

“Sorry about that Mr. Felix, please, right this way.” She said softly and he turned and nodded at her. She then walked to the frosted doors and knocked loudly on them waiting for a moment before they both heard an acknowledgement. 

Felix was ushered into the office of Miss Whalton and nearly gasped loudly as his eyes were immediately drawn to the wall of floor to ceiling windows that showed a beautiful image of the cityscape outside. It was stunning and nearly stole his breath from him as his eyes darted around the skyline of the city.

”Miss Whalton, I’d like to introduce you to Mr. Lee, the new head of the I.T. Department.” Came the assistant’s voice and Felix quickly turned from the windows and nearly swallowed his tongue at the sight of you. You were a vision to him dressed in a pair of form fitting deep navy business pants with a cream colored button up blouse. Your sleeves were rolled up to your elbows and your wrists were adorned with delicate gold bracelets as you stood from your desk and walked over to him smiling widely while holding your hand out to him in greeting.

“Mr. Lee, congratulations on your promotion.” you greeted him warmly and Felix blushed hotly at your attention. He quickly reached forward and gripped your hand in a sturdy handshake, surprised at how firm and confident your hand felt in his.

“Thank you Miss Whalton, it’s a pleasure to meet you.” he greeted you with a soft shy smile and your answering smile made his breath stutter in his chest.

“Rachel would you hold any calls for the next two hours, I’d like to get to know Mr. Lee better and what he has planned for the I.T. department.” you said looking at your assistant who beamed at you and nodded her head eagerly. “Oh, that is if you’re free Mr. Lee. I know you just found out about your promotion, I don’t want to take your time away if you’re busy celebrating.” you said quickly as your head turned back to him.

“No!” he rushed out and grimaced slightly at how eager he must sound to you. “No, I’d love to talk and tell you my plans.” he said warmly and you nodded your head before turning back to Rachel.

“Of course Miss Whalton.” she said, nodding her head before walking out of your office.

“Please have a seat.” you said kindly as you gestured to the small area near the windows where there was a plush armchair and a sofa. Felix quickly moved to the armchair and sat down nearly groaning at how the cushions encased him and cradled him comfortably. “I had the same reaction to the armchair when I first sat in it.” you said with a soft chuckle and Felix flushed brightly at you being able to catch his reaction to the armchair. “Sofa feels the same way, I loved them so much that I bought the whole set for my apartment too.” you said cheekily and Felix grinned at your admission.

“You’re very observant.” he says and you grin at him softly before nodding your head.

“For people, yes, but I hate to admit that I’m utterly clueless when it comes to electronics or computers. I’m a little old fashioned that way.” you admit as you grimace slightly as your eyes dart over to your windows watching the cityscape beyond. Felix is surprised by your admission and he leans forward wanting to know more about you, it seemed so easy to fall into a camaraderie with you already and he was a little thrown off by how friendly you were being. You seemed nothing like what Rachel had told him and he was waiting anxiously for the other shoe to drop.

“Well we’re opposites in that sense then.” Felix admitted with a bashful smile and your eyes darted back over to him and surveyed him quietly. “I’m more comfortable with computers than people.”

“Really? Well that’s not surprising to be honest.” you said as you tilted your head to the side. “Your resume was very impressive for someone as young as yourself. It speaks for you and makes total sense when you say that you’re more comfortable with computers.” Felix blushed hotly at your praise of his work experience as he ducked his head. “So I won’t know much of what you talk about when it comes to the computers but tell me what you have planned for the department.” you said with a cheeky smile as you gesture a hand out in front of you allowing him to speak freely. Felix beams with eagerness as he begins to explain to you all the plans that he’d like to accomplish as the head of the department, he notices as he tries to keep things in layman terms for you that your eyes only glaze over towards the end of the talk and he has to hide his giggle when you shake your head trying to clear it.

*-*-*-*

It’s been two weeks since Felix has been promoted and so far he feels as if he’s slipped into the role very well. He’s started implementing weekly meetings with his supervisory staff to keep a finger on the pulse of his department and make sure that he’s on top of any concerns or worries that they come across. That’s how he finds himself closing his latest meeting with them that morning frowning softly, the previous head of the department while was really competent with running the department they weren’t as well equipped on the logistics of cyber security like Felix is. After this meeting it’s become quite clear to him how loose your company’s security is. He knows it’ll only become a greater problem if he doesn’t get ahead of it now. That’s why he doesn’t even think as he rushes around his desk after shutting his office door to make a phone call to Rachel. 

Just as he sits down at his desk and reaches for his desk phone it begins to ring and he frowns softly wondering who would be calling him at work. He quickly picks up the phone and answers it easily.

”I.T. Department, Felix speaking.” He says in a professional tone and hears a soft sigh on the other end.

”Oh thank goodness. Mr. Lee, do you have time to come to Miss Whalton’s office? She’s managed to lose a file on her computer that she needs for an afternoon meeting and she’s starting to panic.” Rachel’s voice chimes over the phone line and Felix smiles softly at the mention of you.

”Of course, do you know if Miss Whalton has free time right now? I’d like to speak with her about my concerns about the company’s cybersecurity.” He said hopefully.

”She’s free for the next thirty minutes before she has to go to a lunch meeting.” Rachel informs and he grins before he’s quickly picking up his notebook.

”Okay, I’ll be right up.” He says relieved before hanging up the phone. The ride up in the elevator is quiet but Felix is filled eagerness and a giddy joy that bubbles within him. His proxy card has been upgraded to give him access to the top floor ever since he was promoted and he can’t help but grin widely as the elevator display beeps and blinks green before he presses the button for the top floor.

He can’t wait to see you again, he can’t deny ever since meeting you his mind has been filled with thoughts of you. Your easy conversation that you had shared together left him wanting more time with you, he wanted to learn more about you. It was almost as if he was having withdrawals of you, like he had been hooked on you with just that one meeting and conversation. 

And it wasn’t just your appearance that had kept his mind on you, no that was the thing that caught his attention but what kept his attention turning back to you was the easy laid back attitude that had an undercurrent of confidence. Your conversation had lasted only two hours but within the time frame you had shared parts of yourself with him that had felt like only a taste and he wanted more. He wanted so much more.

Soon the elevator doors were opening with a soft ding and he was striding down the hallway smiling softly at a relieved looking Rachel as she stood from her desk in a rush. She looked a little stressed as she beckoned him quickly to her side.

”Thank you so much for getting here so quickly. She’s a little stressed with everything that’s going on this week and with losing this file that she needs for her afternoon meeting she’s a little frazzled.” Rachel explained quickly to him as she escorted him to the frosted glass doors. Felix nodded his head at her words knowing that he’d do whatever he needed to restore your file just to make your day run a little smoother.

”Okay, no worries I’ll be able to find it.” He reassured her and she sighed softly nodding her head before knocking on the glass doors.

”Come in Rachel.” Your voice rang out with a tiredness that Felix could actually feel and he frowned softly wondering if you had taken the time to rest this week yet or things had been keeping you too busy to do that. Rachel easily ushered him into your office and you looked up from your computer with an aggravated sigh. “Oh, Mr. Lee.” You said surprised and Felix grinned at you as his eyes caught onto your wide eyes. “I wasn’t expecting you this quickly.” You admitted and his grin widened on his face happily.

”Rachel said you needed my help of course I’d drop everything to help you.” He said easily with a shrug of his shoulders feeling pride rush through him as your cheeks flushed prettily at his words.

”I’ll leave you to it.” Rachel said softly before nodding her head at the two of you before she scurried out of the office.

”Thank you Rachel!” You called out after her before standing from your desk. “Please take my seat.” You said easily gesturing to your chair before you moved a step away from it. Felix nodded as he pushed his glasses further up onto his nose with his index finger before walking over to your chair and easily taking a seat in it. You moved to the side of your desk and rested your hip on the edge of it as you crossed your arms over your chest before watching as he began to work.

”What type of file are we looking for?” He asked as he quickly began moving your mouse around your screen before he pulled up a command screen by typing on your keyboard.

”It’s a PowerPoint file. I was working on it earlier this morning trying to finish it before my meeting this afternoon and I got distracted by a phone call with Legal and when I turned back to my computer the file was gone.” You said helplessly as your thumb came up to your mouth and began to worry the skin of it with your teeth. Felix looked up at you in awe for a moment as his eyes followed your mouth’s movement against your thumb, he felt a pit form in his lower stomach as he watched your pretty pink lips slip around your thumb.

Shaking his head he quickly turned back to your computer before he nodded his head and began typing away at your keyboard looking for the file that you needed so desperately. He chuckled softly when it took him literally no time to find the file in an unnamed folder on your desktop and you tilted your head at him curiously.

”Don’t tell me you’ve already found it.” You bemoaned and Felix laughed delightedly at your frustration.

”Is this it?” He asked as he opened the file and you groaned loudly as you hung your head causing him to laugh loudly at your movements.

”Yes. That’s it.” You confessed and he grinned over at you with glee reflected fully in his face. “Thank you.” You said softly before grimacing. “Told you I was computer illiterate.” 

“Didn’t think it was this bad though.” Felix said amazed and you groaned once again causing him to grin up at you cheekily. You stomped your foot softly and Felix felt his eyes widened as he watched your tiny tantrum. “Oh that was cute.” He said teasingly and you shot him a feeble glare that had him laughing once again.

”Yeah, yeah. Don’t get used to it Mr. Lee.” You griped out and he flushed softly at you addressing him so formally.

”Please call me Felix.” He said kindly and you smirked softly at him as you straightened your posture next to him.

”That’s awfully informal don’t you think?” You asked softly and Felix felt his eyes widened with the panic that suddenly seized him, had he stepped over the line with you? Your pretty chuckle caught his attention and he focused on you once more. “Relax Felix, I was teasing.” You reassured him. “I owe you for your quick help.” You said to him goodnaturedly and he smiled softly before nodding his head.

”Actually I wanted to bring up something that I found concerning about the company.” He explained and watched as your eyes narrowed at him slightly before you slowly nodded your head. He stood from your chair and moved behind you allowing you to take your seat once again, he then moved to your side where he had placed his notebook and flipped it open to his report that he had typed up and handed it to you. You looked down at the report and Felix smiled as he watched your head tilt to the side trying to understand what it all meant. 

“You’re going to have to explain this to me so that I can understand. Is there something wrong with our security?” You asked him before you looked up from his report. He smiled softly as he nodded his head.

”Not the building’s physical security but the cyber security of the company. The digital files for the company have little to no security of being hacked or stolen from our network. I’d like to implement counter measures for the possibilities of attacks, not to mention secure all of the company’s files so that there’s more protection.” He explained gently and you frowned softly at his words before slowly nodding your head.

”How easy would it be to have our files hacked or stolen?” You asked, trying to understand and Felix smiled warmly at your attempt.

”A high schooler could probably hack into the email system.” He told you honestly and you frowned softly at his words.

”Okay, and you want to make it much harder for that to happen?” You asked as Felix nodded. “How do you plan to do that?” You asked curiously.

”I’d like to set up firewalls and tighter points of security within the network. It means that there’s barriers of code that hackers wouldn’t be able to get through.” He said as easily as he possibly could.

”Okay, draw up a plan with prices and hours of work to get this done and we’ll get it taken care of. I want you in charge of the project, make sure you’re aware of every aspect of this. Whatever you need to get this done you’ll get it.” You said easily and Felix snapped his head to stare at you with wide eyes.

”Really?” He asked, sounding breathless. You looked at him incredulously for a moment before smiling softly at him.

”Of course. There’s a problem with our security and we need to fix it. You know better about this stuff than I do and were able to find the issue with it already. I’ll make sure you have everything to fix it. You’ll be working closely with purchasing for whatever your needs are for this project.” You informed him and Felix felt his chest swell with accomplishment, he thought you would delay the project but you seemed very trusting of him and it touched him in a way that he wanted to do his best to make sure your company was protected.

”Thank you.” He said reverently and you nodded your head at him easily before you waved a hand dismissively.

”Just don’t let it get out that I’m so computer illiterate.” You griped and he grinned widely at you before winking at you.

”My lips are sealed.” He teased and that pretty flush grew on your cheeks once more enchanting him again. He felt himself falling into your charm so easily as his body leaned closer to you as you stared up at him blinking owlishly.

Just then there was a loud commotion coming from outside your office doors and you frowned softly before turning your head to glare at the doors. They flew open and nearly crashed back against the walls and you stood slowly from your chair. Felix felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand at attention as you slowly stalked around him and your desk to stand between him and whatever was coming through your office doors.

”Miss Whalton! I need to speak to you about this contract with Yang Incorporated. It’s too much in favor of the other company! You can’t be that daft to just squander this type of money all on a consultation!” Shouted a tall slender man with slicked back black hair dressed in an expensive pressed suit. Felix frowned darkly at the man who just came barging into your office without any care for your space. Rachel rushed in after him trying to usher him out and when the man turned and sneered at her causing her to step back quickly in haste to get away from him Felix felt the air grow cold in the room.

”Mr. Reeves!” You snapped angrily and the man turned back to you leaving Rachel alone and allowing her to exit the office when you nodded at her. 

“Miss Whalton! This contract is horrible for the company!” He insisted once again and Felix watched quietly as you crossed your arms over your chest and widened your stance as you stared the tall man down. “You are going to run your company into the ground if you just throw your money away like this!”

”Mr. Reeves, last time I checked you were a paralegal for my company and not an actual shareholder. You don’t make the decisions, I do.” You stated in a dangerously even tone that made Felix shiver as he bit his lip trying to curb his urge to laugh at your scathing remark. He stood next to your desk watching breathlessly as you faced off with the loud paralegal and felt the knot in his lower stomach start to form once again. “Stay in your lane, or there will be consequences.” You snipped out angrily and Felix felt the knot tighten with desire and fear laced together.

”Miss Whalton!” Insisted Mr. Reeves loudly as his top lip curled at you angrily.

”I didn’t stutter, did I?” You asked and Felix gasped softly at how that one question gripped in him a chokehold of lust.

”You are going to burn this company to the ground and I will not be a part of it.” Mr. Reeves foolishly snapped at you and Felix gaped at the man silently.

”Good, I’ll call security. They’ll escort you out.” You said in a dismissive tone before turning on your heel and stalking back to your desk to grab your desk phone. Felix made sure to stay as still as possible as you walked around him with a dark scowl on your face not wanting to feel your wrath directed at him.

”Wait! No Miss Whalton!” Scrambled Mr. Reeves as he walked towards your desk with his hands raised.

”You’re dismissed.” You said while leveling the man with a stoic look that had Felix shifting on his feet as his pants grew tight in a certain area. Felix watched with wide eyes as Mr. Reeves looked at you with a defeated look on his face as you spoke with security on the phone before he huffed and stormed out of your office in a rush.

”Holy shit.” Felix said quietly as you hung up the phone and turned to him with a soft grimace on your face.

”Sorry, you had to see that.” You said to him in apology but he quickly shook his head.

”Rachel warned me that you could be intimidating but I didn’t believe her after meeting you.” He said in a slight daze as you chuckled softly at his explanation before you shook your head. You carded a hand through your hair and shook it out before sighing softly, Felix could see the tiredness suddenly settling in your body and he stood there amazed at the many different sides of you that he was learning about already.

”Am I really that intimidating?” You asked curiously and Felix balked at your question.

”Absolutely terrifying in a sexy way.” Felix blurted out causing you to burst out in shocked laughter before his eyes widened and he looked at you with embarrassment coloring his face bright red. Your laughter morphed from the shocked sound to a happy cackle that made his embarrassment ease as delight filled him.

”Thank you for that. I needed that.” You said once you were finally able to get your laughter under control as you wiped tears from the corners of your eyes. Your eyes sparkled up at him with humor dancing within their depths and he found himself falling into them so easily.

”Miss Whalton, you have that lunch meeting to get to.” Rachel called out from the office door and Felix jerked back from his slight lean over you as you turned to face Rachel with a bright smile.

”Thank you Rachel. Apparently I’m absolutely terrifying.” You said proudly and Felix groaned softly as Rachel and yourself laughed delighted at his torture.

”You certainly are.” Rachel agreed and Felix shot her a glare that made her smirk at him.

”Get the plans drafted and submit them to purchasing so that we can get the security issued fixed.” You directed Felix and he nodded his head quickly. You smirked softly up at him as your eyes sparkled once again with delight and humor. “Thank you Felix.” You said fondly with that delicious smirk still gracing your lips and he nodded dazedly before walking out of your office. Rachel raised her eyebrow at him as he passed her with a knowing look on her face while he tried to avoid her eyes.

*-*-*-*

The next two months are busy for Felix as he works diligently on the cyber security project, he doesn’t get much one-on-one time with you besides your short project meetings to go over what’s going on. But you’re still heavily involved in the project and your steady presence throughout it gives Felix the confidence boost that he needs to complete it to his satisfaction.

And even when he’s not able to have much alone time with you like he’d want to, the time you both do share together is still special and meaningful to him. Your personality shines through no matter what situation you’re in and he’s drawn to you like a moth to a flame. He’s been privy to so many sides of you that he feels like he’s got a well rounded picture of who you are as a person now and he likes what he sees. He likes it so much that he realizes that the two of you have grown from workplace acquaintances into friends without him even noticing until it’s already happened. There’s a comfortability between the two of you and he loves it.

You’re a hard worker who tries to be as fair as possible with all of your employees but you don’t shy away from hard situations and are able to step in swiftly. You also care a great deal for your employees as you would splurge on them for work lunches and approving overtime during the project. He did notice when the meetings would turn more towards the technical side of things you took a back seat and grew quiet while trying to follow along with what everyone else was saying. He would often find you writing down notes during these times and after everyone had left and it was just you and him cleaning up after everyone you would ask him your questions that you hadn’t understood. It found it utterly endearing that you tried to understand it all but just couldn’t seem to wrap your mind around the digital side of things.

In fact he offers one night to teach you more about the digital side of things and you eagerly take him up on his offer. The two of you soon fall into a pattern of spending some time after work hours holed up in your office going over aspects that were brought up during the meetings. Felix loved the extra time with you and grew to look forward to it every evening after he was done working, you were always so different when you weren’t working, more open and less stoic. 

But tonight as he makes his way out of his office locking it up behind him he sees your text come through letting him know that you’ve still got some things that you have to work on and won’t fault him if he doesn’t come see you. He smiles down at his phone before huffing softly at your text, you were always so considerate of his time and it made him fall harder for you. You were always so enchanting to him that it didn’t surprise him that he had fallen in love with you over such a short period of time.

Walking into the elevator and presenting his proxy card to the display he sighed softly as he leaned back against the back wall of the elevator. He had realized that he was in love with you halfway through the security project and it had only grown from there. You never gave off any indication of how you felt about him and he was worried that he was in too deep and would get his heart broken. He knew you’d do it as gently as possible if that was the case but he was still worried, which is why he never acted on his feelings for you since realizing them.

The elevator soon came to a stop on the top floor and Felix was walking out quietly as he ran a hand through his hair making it a mess to hang around his tired face. His eyes darted over to see Rachel’s desk abandoned and he smiled softly knowing that there would be no distractions tonight other than your work, but he was pretty positive that he could convince you to stop working. Smirking softly he gently pushed your office door open before peeking his head inside, your head snapped up from its hanging position as you poured over paperwork littering your desk. 

“Evening” Felix greeted you kindly and you smiled tiredly at him.

“Hi Felix.” you said tiredly and he walked towards you before his eyes darted down your body and nearly halted in his steps. His eyes widened slightly before narrowing in on your button up blouse, it was form fitting and hugged your body like a second skin but what made all the blood rush from his head to his stiffening cock was the fact that the top three buttons were unbuttoned and he could see your maroon colored lacy bra underneath. You tilted your head to the side confused at his change in manner before your eyes darted down to your blouse and you blushed brightly before gripping the shirt together.

“No don’t!” Felix called out suddenly as he rushed to your side. “Fuck sweetheart, you look gorgeous.” he husked out and you gaped up at him while blinking your eyes rapidly. He trails his fingers along your arm and you shiver at his touch as your hand loosens its grip on your shirt as you stare up at him in awe. He crowds you against your desk feeling your body flush with his and he groans softly as one hand grips your hip while his thigh slots between yours. His eyes dart over your exposed chest and his tongue darts out to swipe against his bottom lip. “Why I wouldn’t give to see the whole set.” he says softly and you gasp heatedly at his words.

“You’re lying.” you insist and he shakes his head as his eyes focus on your own confused ones.

“Absolutely not.” he retorts adamantly and you blink again at him. “I’ve been falling in love with you for months now.” he confesses quietly and your mouth drops open slightly as your eyes sparkle with delight while your hands grip his polo shirt and pull him closer to you.

“Kiss me, please.” you gasp out at him and Felix grins widely at your request before his other hand is coming up to cup your check and tilt your head up to his as his lips slant against yours in a heated wet kiss. The two of you stand there leaning against your desk as your mouths move together in a delicious dance that makes his head swim.

“No more working please, sweetheart.” he pleads with you after pulling away from your delectable mouth. “Let me take you home.” he whispers to you and you nod your head as your eyes glaze over causing him to smile widely at his affect on you. “Never thought I could make your eyes glaze over with more than just computer talk.” he teases and you suddenly narrow your eyes at him as one of your hands travels down his chest and cups him in his pants making him groan low in his throat.

“You’re lucky I love you too Felix. Lesser men wouldn’t get the chance to tease me this much.” you tell him sultrily and he beams down at you with happiness coursing through him. “Now take me home.” you instruct him and he nods his head hurriedly before he’s guiding you away from the desk and gathering both of your things.

SKZ Taglist: @intartaruginha

[forlix]

𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐞・l.f.

— felix misses you a little extra tonight; good thing you're way ahead of him.

words・1.7k pairing・idol!felix x gn!reader warnings・brief mentions of the ocean, drowning imagery genres・fluff, angst, established relationship, pining, hurt/comfort, lots of (happy) tears

a/n・i had exo's "been through" on repeat while writing this; pls give it a listen it's beautiful and so underrated and captures the fic perfectly. enjoy &lt;3

When Felix steps into Tokyo's night air, he can still hear the remnants of tonight's concert in the distance, the occasional car horn and the low thrum of conversation floating over the dome of the stadium. But for the most part, it is quiet, and Felix is finally able to think.

He thinks about how he's happiest after performances: leftover adrenaline warming his skin, strobe lights still dancing across his vision, heartbeat still drumming against his ribs like the heavy bass that shook the stage prior. He thinks about how much he loves leaving each venue knowing that, even if only for a few hours, he owned the place; set it utterly ablaze.

But he mostly thinks about you.

From the moment Felix started loving you, his happiness became yours. A bite of brownie fresh out of the oven, met with widened eyes and a delighted mmm; every funny story relayed to you later that night (poorly, because he keeps interrupting himself to laugh); photographs, so many photographs—an especially rotund pigeon he spots on the way to practice, a new pair of earrings that’s way too expensive but looks way too good on him, cute texts from his mom—inevitably making their way into your camera roll.

He can’t help it. He only wants to experience the best parts of the world with you by his side.

So it is in his happiest moments that he feels your absence the strongest. And now, Felix so badly wishes you were here that he physically aches. It feels a bit like his heart is being swallowed by seawater, nothing in any direction for miles, nowhere to go but down.

Only when Chan materializes next to him does Felix manage to steady his feet on the cement once again.

“It’s not here yet?” Chan surveys the lot for their tour bus, to no avail. “Good thing, I guess. Everyone's taking their sweet time.”

The older boy gives Felix a glance thoughtlessly, looks away, and then looks back, his gaze lingering on the side of his face for longer this time, and Felix knows that Chan knows exactly what’s going through his head. For a second, Chan seems like he wants to say something, but Felix averts his eyes to his shoes, takes out his phone.

Not now.

“I think I left something inside,” Chan says instead, though he never leaves anything anywhere. Felix manages an appreciative smile. Without another word, Chan claps a hand to Felix’s shoulder and disappears back into the building, as quickly as he came.

A few seconds pass. Then, as naturally as if by muscle memory, Felix taps on your contact and holds his phone to his ear.

It rings once, twice, thrice—and then he hears your voice, but not in the way he yearns for.

“Hi, you’ve reached Y/N! I’m unable to come to the phone right now, but please leave a message and I'll get back—”

He ends the call, his brow furrowed. You knew he had a concert today. And you should've known to anticipate the call that would come right after, as faithfully as the sun’s rise and fall.

He calls a second time, hoping this was an obstruction of ‘do not disturb’ and nothing more, but is met with the voice message again.

The call of the ocean's depths becomes louder.

As he sits through the automated response, Felix leans against the wall behind him and tilts his head back against the plaster, his gaze moving over the night sky. Then, he hears the beep, and starts to speak.

“Hi, my love. I called, and you didn’t pick up, and I got worried. Is everything alright? Maybe you’re busy, or asleep? Remember to take care of yourself first and foremost—everything else pales in comparison. Everything."

His voice feels far steadier than he feels.

“Ah, I miss you, darling. The concert went super well; the energy was unreal. We have a few hours to explore Tokyo tomorrow before heading to our next stop, and I’m excited as hell, but I wish you could be here more than anything in the world. I haven’t stopped thinking about how much you’ve always wanted to visit this city since we got here—Seungmin even said he'd save his visit to the Pokemon Center for whenever we come back with you. All of us are thinking of you, babe. Me especially. Me hopelessly.

"One day, you and I are gonna travel the world together, responsibilities and schedules be damned, and we'll spend as long as you want wherever you want. As long as I can be next to you. God, I fucking miss you. I said that already, right?”

A short distance away, the building door opens again, and Felix quickly ducks his head out of view, suddenly conscious of his watery eyes and blurring vision.

“I gotta go. I think the members are ready to go back to the hotel. Call me back when you get a chance, okay?”

The next words catch in Felix’s throat, and he has to wince and take a long, shaky breath in order to get them out.

“I love you to the ends of the universe, angel. Share some of your light with the moon tonight, yeah?” He presses a kiss to the receiver. “I love you, I love you, I love you. Bye.”

With that, Felix hangs up, drops his phone into his pocket, and presses both sleeves tightly against his eyes, willing himself to calm down.

No, he thinks, shoulders quivering with the effort, it really never gets easier.

It takes a while for it to strike Felix as odd that it’s still quiet outside; he could’ve sworn that he heard the door open and close, that he should be hearing the tired chatter of his members by now. Apprehensively (obliviously), Felix lifts his face from his hands and turns around.

Chan, so solemn and quiet before, now wears a Cheshire grin that instantly devolves into a breathy laugh when he meets Felix’s eye. Hyunjin stands behind Chan, holding his phone up, evidently filming. Felix’s lips part in confusion, a question forming on the tip of his tongue. There are enough videos of me crying my eyes out on the internet, no?

But then his eyes fall on the person standing in between the two men, their arms piled so high with flower bouquets that their face is almost concealed entirely, and he forgets what he wanted to say; he forgets every language he knows.

“So we were contacted by a fan the other day,” Hyunjin says, beaming. “Kept calling you their boyfriend. Forced us to fly them out to Japan and everything.”

“It'd be real bad if we got the wrong person,” Chan adds, and a stifled laugh comes from behind the petals—one that Felix would recognize in every corner of the world, in every lifetime. “They look familiar?”

The bouquets part, and behind them you appear, cheeks visibly flushed even under the lot’s singular streetlight, smile so bright that it’s turned your eyes to crescent moons.

"Surprise," you say softly.

The empty lot finally erupts into laughter, Chan and Hyunjin no longer able to restrain themselves. Can't believe we pulled this off, they're saying to each other triumphantly, but everyone, everything around Felix vanishes save for the person he adores most in the world, holding more flowers than they should be able to carry, looking at him as if he's made of pure starlight.

And Felix's heart starts kicking upwards, towards the rays of moonlight filtering through the murky water, as fervently as if his life depends on it—and, in this moment, it does.

“Hand 'em over, fool,” Chan says to you. And as you start transferring the heaps of flowers into the leader’s arms, Felix has never moved faster in his life.

In the span of a few seconds, his hand finds the small of your back, and yours the nape of his neck. “Holy fuck,” Felix whispers, and then he’s pulling you against his chest tightly, desperately. There is no word that can describe the way you melt into one another except for destiny, one of your hands curling in his hair and the other running over his shoulder; his face burrowing in the crook of your neck, fingers lacing together against your spine.

His pulse is so loud that he hears it in all directions, in all parts of him. Felix squeezes his eyes shut against the material of your crewneck, his whole body shaking with silent sobs as the overwhelming array of emotions he'd harbored prior finally spills over. And he stops thinking entirely, simply loses himself in all that you are: the smell of your laundry detergent, the sound of your laugh, the feel of your embrace, so secure and warm as if promising him you’ll never let go.

“I love you, Lee Yongbok,” you murmur, the words only for the two of you to hear.

With the sound of his full name, Felix's heart breaks through the ocean's surface at last. Not only that; it performs a triple axel on the shoreline, and it sure as hell doesn’t stick the landing, slipping and sliding and fighting to regain its balance as you continue on.

“Forget the ends of the universe. You are the universe. You are everything that has ever existed and everything that ever will. And I couldn’t bear to be away from my galaxy for a second longer.”

Felix shakes his head from where it remains buried against you, his voice a broken rasp when he answers, “I’m not whole without you, angel. I never will be again.”

“I'm here, baby,” you reply, your hands tightening around his hoodie, among his long locks. “Whether I'm right next to you or on the other side of the world, I'm always with you. And I will be tomorrow, and the day after, and eons from now. That—”

Your lips find the shell of his ear, then his temple.

“—is a promise, my sunlight.”

Chan is standing with bundles of flowers still piled high in his arms, silent tears streaming down his face, and Hyunjin’s expression is contorted into a terribly suppressed weep, his still-recording phone long forgotten in his pocket. They don't have it in them to tell you to get a room. Not right now.

𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤? please consider reblogging, commenting, or sending me an ask to let me know; or, read my other works here. thanks so much for the support ♡

© 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐱 (est. 090323) · all works are pieces of original writing and all characters and relationships are purely fictional. please do not repost or reuse for any reason.

[tinyundercover]

pepper & felix

part thirteen

:))))))) cw: excessive alcohol consumption word count: 4.1k

MASTERPOST

Pepper did not understand alcohol.

He was aware that humans drank it, but he was appalled as to why. In the last few years he had run into his fair share of humans that seemed to be overcome by the effects of alcohol, pink-faced and dizzy and loud, and he had always avoided them. Why would humans do this to themselves?

He and Basil had grown up in a bakery, surrounded by warmth and sugar, so Pepper hadn’t been exposed to alcohol until he moved out at the age of nineteen. After two weeks of traveling, he had found his first home– a small house occupied by a middle-aged human couple. It had been frightening to live somewhere entirely new, but it had turned out to be a comfortable home for him.

For two years, he had observed the human couple, and had been confused by their occasional consumption of alcohol. Once, after running across some leftover liquor in a glass, he had even tried a sip. His curiosity had left him choking and spluttering and absolutely revolted by the humans’ drink. His confusion had only increased.

After the humans had noticed their things going missing and had begun to set out mouse traps, Pepper had been forced to leave their house and search for a new home. He had made his way into an apartment complex around the time he turned twenty-one years old, and had built a new home within the walls of an introverted, blonde human, who Pepper pleasantly noticed very rarely drank alcohol.

Now, he stood on the arm of the human’s couch, staring up at said human in front of him. 

“I thought you didn’t like parties,” he pointed out, brow furrowing. 

Felix sighed, features soft. “I don’t, not really,” he admitted, leaning down to see Pepper better. “But I kind of have to go to this one.”

“Why?” Pepper asked incredulously.

“I dunno… it’s a cast party, so it would be a little rude for me not to show up, I guess. I already told everyone I would go.”

Pepper shook his head, astounded. He couldn’t imagine attending any kind of party, especially one he didn’t want to go to. As far as he knew, human parties consisted of large groups of humans getting together to be incredibly loud and take up space. It sounded awful.

“I’m only gonna go for a little bit,” Felix continued, gaze dancing over Pepper’s uneasy form. It was hard to tell why Pepper was so uncomfortable with this. 

To be honest, Pepper wasn’t sure why he was so nervous, either. Looking up at Felix, taking in the entirety of the human’s tall and imposing form, his stomach fluttered. Felix, surely, would be able to take care of himself in the presence of so many other humans. Pepper shouldn’t worry.

Pepper nodded slowly, crossing his arms. “Alright.”

“It’ll be okay,” Felix promised, straightening up. He wore a baggy graphic tee and blue jeans, reminding Pepper that this was a comfortable, casual event for the human. The borrower forced himself to take a deep breath and nodded again.

“Right,” he agreed unhappily. “I’ll see you later.”

However, as listened to the sound of the front door closing moments later, he couldn’t fight the feeling that something awful was bound to happen.

–

Forty people was a lot to fit into Ricky’s small apartment.

Felix weaved his way through the crowd in the kitchen, gaze searching, feeling incredibly out of place. Every so often someone would stop him to say hi, only to abandon the conversation a moment later, making Felix wonder how useless his social skills could be. Relief filled his chest when he spotted Breanna and Owen, chatting by the wall, and he gratefully walked over to them. “Hey.”

“Felix!” Breanna lit up instantly. “I was wondering when you’d get here.”

Felix checked his phone, sheepishly observing the fact that he was over an hour late. He had stalled by talking to Pepper for far too long. “Is Alice here?”

Owen took a sip of his drink, because unlike Felix and Breanna, he was happy to have a few drinks when they went to parties. “Yeah, somewhere.”

“What are you doing here?”

Owen grinned. “I like parties.”

Felix let out a breathy laugh. Despite the fact that Owen wasn’t in the cast, it was nice to see a familiar face. Owen had accompanied his three friends to so many theater events that he might as well be considered an honorary theater member at this point.

The next twenty minutes were bearable, as Felix lingered by the wall with his friends. Music filled the air, blasting from a speaker, so Felix was forced to lean in close to his friends to even hear them properly. 

When Alice approached them, Felix almost forgot the weird situation the two of them were currently in, more relieved to have another face he recognized as a friend. Her black hair had been pulled into a slicked-back ponytail, revealing the sharpness of her expression as she glanced over Felix. A red solo cup was held in her hand. “Hey, Felix.”

“Hey.” Felix opened his mouth, but found himself at a loss for words, hesitantly turning away from Alice to listen in on Breanna and Owen’s conversation. The tension in the air suddenly filled his lungs.

The past week of rehearsals had been uncomfortable, to say the least. Felix and Alice didn’t say much to each other, both of them gravitating towards Breanna as their closest friend. Felix didn’t know what to do, or how to repair his relationship with Alice.

Were they fighting? He thought that they had cleared things up, but Alice’s lingering frowns and cold eyes made him feel like they weren’t past the borrower situation. He wanted to bring it up to her, but he was terrified of somehow betraying the borrowers, or rubbing salt into the freshly opened wound of his and Alice’s relationship. He didn’t know what to do.

“Rehearsals have been crazy, huh?” Alice remarked suddenly.

Felix met her gaze, peering intently. “Yeah,” he agreed after a moment, grateful that Alice had broken the tension first. “Yeah, how have you been holding up?”

Alice laughed, then took a long sip of her drink. Felix vaguely noticed the pink twinge in her cheeks. “If Mrs. Shelton makes us run the ballroom dance one more time, I’m gonna lose it.”

Felix let out a laugh at that. In rehearsal yesterday, he and Alice had spent hours working on one singular dance scene between Ariel and Eric. It had become exhausting after a while, especially considering the fact that the two of them were barely on speaking terms and had to act like they were madly in love. Being able to laugh about it brought a warm feeling into Felix’s chest. 

After a few minutes, Breanna and Owen tuned into Felix and Alice’s conversation. The four of them together, laughing and comfortable, was something Felix had missed greatly. He hoped that Alice felt the same.

An hour into the party Ricky organized karaoke, which the cast grew ecstatic for. The majority of them crammed into the large space of the living room, and Felix and Alice watched in amusement as Breanna dragged Owen towards a microphone and insisted that he sing a duet with her. 

“Owen should sing more,” Alice commented as the redhead reluctantly began a few rocky notes, grinning at Breanna. “He’s got a good voice.”

Felix hummed in agreement, arms crossing. The pair of them lingered by the door to the kitchen, and after a moment Alice peered into her empty cup. “I’m going to the kitchen,” she decided. “Do you want anything?”

“I don’t really drink.”

“Forgot. Sorry.” Alice shrugged and slipped away.

Felix turned back to Breanna and Owen, who were now belting enthusiastically into their mics. An uncomfortable feeling fixed around Felix’s chest, and he turned and followed Alice into the kitchen.

Alice stood alone by the counter, filling her solo cup from a bowl of spiked punch. She glanced up as Felix approached. “Changed your mind?”

“No, I just… wanted to talk to you,” Felix admitted, leaning against the counter. Alice eyed him, bringing her cup to her lips, expectant. Felix hesitantly continued. “Is everything… okay with us?”

Alice took a few extra seconds to set her cup down, stalling. “What do you mean?”

“You know what I mean.” Felix kept his voice light, raising his eyebrows. Alice’s lips twitched into a smile, then dropped, and she lowered her gaze. “I mean, you’re my closest friend, Alice. I don’t want things to get weird between us just because of one little mistake.”

Alice nodded slowly, continuing to avoid Felix’s gaze. Her fingers drummed over her cup. “I don’t know.”

Felix’s heart fell. “What?”

“I don’t know,” Alice repeated, blue gaze flickering. There was no malice or anger in her quiet voice. At Felix’s startled silence, she continued, turning her body towards him. “I mean, are those… people still in your apartment?”

Felix flushed, glancing away. “Uh… no, no, they’re not.”

Silence stretched between them for a bit too long. Alice’s eyebrows raised pointedly. “They are, aren’t they?”

“No,” Felix insisted lamely. 

Alice remained quiet, taking a sip of her drink, and Felix’s stomach twisted. When she finally spoke, it was to say, “I just… I feel hurt.”

“You… what?”

“I’m hurt. I get it, I made a mistake, but you treated me— you’ve been treating me— like I’m this awful person.” Alice’s voice rose suddenly, the redness of her cheeks growing. “You won’t even look at me in rehearsal.”

A cold, heavy feeling settled into Felix’s chest, and he took a step back. Realization hit him like a truck. “Wait, you…”

All this time, he thought that Alice had been intentionally avoiding him. Had he really been ignoring her so pointedly?

“That’s not true,” Felix began quickly, suddenly desperate to explain himself. “I’m just worried for the borrowers.”

Alice’s lips thinned. “Borrowers?”

Shit. 

“Alice—”

“What are you worried about?” Alice continued, aghast. “What, that I might take them again? Do you think I haven’t learned my lesson?”

The anger in her face fell away as two more people entered the room. Felix and Alice turned sharply towards Breanna and Owen, who immediately pounced on them.

“Did you hear our song?” Breanna pressed excitedly, not catching onto the tension in the air. “Owen fucked up that high note, did you hear that?”

“I did,” Owen insisted, uncharacteristically proud of his singing voice. 

Felix and Alice must have hesitated for a bit too long, because their two friends’ faces immediately dropped, glancing between them.

“Did something happen?” Breanna asked in alarm.

Alice met Felix’s gaze, a glint in her eye. “Why don’t you tell them?” She grumbled, her flush deepening.

The three others jerked back at her hostility. Owen’s eyebrows raised. “Holy shit. What’s going on?”

“Nothing,” Felix insisted, heart racing. 

“It’s not nothing,” Alice snapped.

“How much have you had to drink?” Breanna interrupted, dark eyes wide with concern as she glanced over Alice. Her nervous gaze turned to Felix, as if he might answer her question. “Is she okay?”

Alice sucked in a sharp breath, voice tense. “I’m fine. Felix, for the love of god, just tell them.”

“Tell us what?”

“I’m not gonna— Alice, I’m not supposed to tell—”

“What, you don’t trust them, either?” 

Alice’s words made Felix freeze. He blinked rapidly, glancing between his three friends, one of which was glaring menacingly and the other two were uneasily watching. His mouth was dry when he said, “Of course I trust you guys. It’s just… it’s not my secret to tell.”

“Oh, why not?” Alice said exasperatedly, leaning closer. “What do you think is gonna happen?”

For a moment, the only noise in the room was the distant sound of someone singing karaoke, comically juxtaposed to the tension in the kitchen. 

Breanna’s voice was quiet. “Guys, maybe you should get some water, sit down—”

“Felix doesn’t trust us,” Alice decided suddenly, jerking away. “He thinks we might hurt his little friends.”

Panic jumped up into Felix’s throat. “Alice.”

“And I did, but barely, and I said sorry, but he still acts like I—”

“Alice!” Felix interjected, chest tight. “Please.”

Alice stared at him for a moment, face flushed, before she tore away from their group and stormed out the door. Breanna stared at Felix, stunned and unsure, before following after Alice.

Felix and Owen were left alone. Owen’s gaze flickered over Felix, curious, silent.

“Owen,” Felix began weakly. “I…”

His friend only lifted his eyebrows, and Felix faltered, leaning back against the counter and bringing a hand to his forehead. The cold feeling had spread from chest throughout his whole body, leaving him feeling numb and unwell. 

Felix’s hand knocked into a glass bottle. 

Suddenly emboldened by the misery in his chest, Felix turned his head defeatedly. “Let’s do some shots.”

–

The quiet whirr of the AC filled the room as the only background noise. Pepper sat on the back of the couch, absentmindedly stitching up a rip in his jacket, draped over his lap.

After Felix had left, Pepper had chosen to remain seated on the couch, waiting for his friend to return. He didn’t have much to do at his home, and he didn’t see the point of walking all the way back there just yet, since Basil wasn’t there. Yesterday she had expressed her guilt to Pepper that she had been “overstaying her welcome” and “third-wheeling,” and since then she had been exploring the expanse of the apartment building, searching for a nearby place to build a home. 

Pepper was worried for her, but he was confident in her abilities to survive on her own. There was no telling when she might return, considering that she might travel all the way back to her original house to explain everything to the borrower family she lived with. He felt guilty that she had gotten caught up in his strange situation with Felix, leaving her feeling like she needed to give them space but also wanting to stick around and provide emotional support to her brother. Moving into her own place in the apartment building seemed like the best solution for the time being.

A sigh let Pepper’s body, and he dropped back, resting his head on the thick surface of the couch. The ceiling stretched high above him, reminding him just how out of place he was in this massive apartment. He had hoped that by spending time in Felix’s apartment by himself, he would grow more comfortable being in such an open space, but his heart still continued to twist every time he remembered how vulnerable he was, out in the open. 

The sound of the front door opening made Pepper instinctively sit up, clutching his jacket. The panic that shot through his body flickered away as he registered that it could only be Felix, and he relaxed. He busied himself by finishing up the stitching of his jacket as he waited for Felix to enter the living room.

It took a surprisingly long time. Footsteps filled the kitchen, followed by the occasional bump or clatter. Something in the back of Pepper’s mind hummed concerning, but he barely acknowledged it, turning his head as a tall figure finally appeared in the doorway.

Almost immediately, Pepper sensed that something was wrong.

Felix, at his enormous height, appeared to have lost his ability to stand properly. A large hand grasped the door frame in order to hold himself up, and despite this Felix still managed to sway back and forth, body unsteady. Pepper’s skin prickled uneasily. The blonde hair atop Felix’s head was slightly disheveled, as if he had just rolled out of bed, and even from across the room Pepper could see the glassiness of his half-lidded eyes as they searched the room.

Pepper’s breath hitched, coldness swarming his chest. He suddenly found that he was frozen, completely isolated on top of the couch. Vulnerability struck him like lightning, and with a dry mouth he shoved his jacket aside, pulling himself to his feet. 

That turned out to be the wrong thing to do. Felix’s gaze was tugged towards Pepper’s movement, and when the human’s eyes finally landed on him Pepper’s instincts all but screamed in his mind.

He didn’t understand what the hell was wrong with Felix, but he didn’t want to stick around and find out.

Felix didn’t seem to notice the way Pepper’s face had gone pale. The human positively lit up at the sight of the borrower, standing frozen on the back of the couch. “Pepper.”

The borrower’s jaw tightened, unable to pull his gaze away from the unsettling sight of his friend. His breath hitched when Felix suddenly approached, stumbling but still much too fast for comfort, and the borrower backed up as much as he could without tumbling off the couch.

“Felix, wha—!” Alarms shrieked in Pepper’s mind at the sight of two massive, foreboding hands reaching for him, and before he could even think to run he was being swept up into a grip far more powerful than he could ever hope to be. “Hey!”

His heart raced in panic. Felix’s unusually clumsy fingers somehow managed to be both too tight and not tight enough, and Pepper gasped, latching onto the fingers around him lest he fall through. The sudden terror that gripped his throat was suffocating.

For the first time since their first meeting, Felix had picked Pepper up without warning. 

“Look at you,” Felix cooed, words slurring. The pink of his cheeks was much more visible from so close, rosy and warm. “You’re so cute.”

Pepper’s breath shuddered, gray eyes wide and startled. Felix was holding him close to his face, closer than he ever had before, allowing the scent of alcohol to hit the borrower and bring the realization crashing down that Felix was drunk.

Hot panic filled Pepper’s chest as he searched Felix’s soft, glassy blue eyes. His lack of experience with alcohol had not prepared him for anything like this. He barely even understood its purpose or effects, let alone how to deal with a giant who was so incredibly drunk he had forgotten how to hold a borrower properly.

Pepper swallowed thickly, heels sliding on Felix’s palm. Felix’s forefinger and thumb were tight around Pepper’s torso, bunching the borrower’s shirt up uncomfortably. His gaze wandered Felix’s face, at an absolute loss of what to do.

“Felix,” Pepper said slowly, carefully. Fear crept up into his throat. “Felix, put me down.”

He couldn’t tell if Felix was listening, or if he could even understand him. He was answered by a sudden punch of vertigo, the air rushing up around him, drawing an exclamation from his chest. “Ah!”

Felix had collapsed onto the couch, knocking the wind out of Pepper’s lungs. The borrower gasped for breath, squirming in Felix’s grip, gaze dancing as he searched for some sort of escape route.

“I missed you,” Felix announced, haphazardly ruffling Pepper’s hair with a finger. The borrower jerked away, startled. “The party— the party wasn’t good.”

Felix spoke as if the words weren’t fitting properly in his mouth, unusual and misshapen. 

“Felix,” Pepper said again, breaths quick and uneven. How long did it take for alcohol to wear off? He had no idea. “You should— put— put me down.”

“I don’t want to,” Felix responded, warm and bright. The words made Pepper’s blood run cold. “You’re— I want… you’re my soulmate.”

“I— I know—” Pepper shivered, pushing anxiously at the fingers around him. He couldn’t handle such close proximity to Felix’s face and his large, warm fingers overwhelming him. They usually were so gentle. 

Felix wasn’t hurting him, but there was a distinct lack of care in the way he was handling Pepper, clumsily and oppressive. Pepper didn’t think that Felix would hurt him intentionally, but the idea that he might accidentally be harmed was very, very prominent in his mind.

“You’re my soulmate and you’re tiny,” Felix suddenly giggled, poking at Pepper’s trembling chest. 

Before Pepper could process what was happening, Felix lost his balance and fell to the side. Pepper yelped, tumbling onto the soft cushion of the couch, catching his breath only when Felix had propped himself up on his elbows, gaze bleary.

The realization that Felix was now hovering over Pepper, shoulders large and towering, sent Pepper’s panic skyrocketing all over again. The borrower scrambled back until he bumped into the arm of the couch.

“Oh,” Felix said, as if he only just realized that he had collapsed. His forearms trapped Pepper into a box, and he blinked several times as he processed the borrower standing only a few inches in front of his face. “Be careful.”

With the massive hands next to him, and the arm of the couch behind him, Pepper had nowhere to go. His lips tightened, processing Felix’s words. “Felix?”

“You’re… little,” Felix hiccuped, moving his hands to cradle Pepper from behind. “You could get hurt.”

Pepper took a moment to steady his breathing, glancing at the hands behind him. “I’m fine. I’m fine, Felix, just don’t—”

In one quick movement, Felix swept Pepper into his palm. He leaned forward, and suddenly he was pressing his soft lips into Pepper’s chest in a big, clumsy kiss.

Shock exploded into Pepper’s heart. The heat that radiated from Felix was overwhelming, enveloping the borrower in fire. The lips against Pepper’s body were soft but so underlyingly powerful, and all he could think about was how close he was to a giant’s mouth and how easily said giant could trap him between his teeth without a second’s thought.

The light pressure vanished as Felix pulled away, then erupted into a fit of giggles, so uncharacteristic for him. Pepper blinked up at him, face scarlet.

“I kissed you,” Felix whispered teasingly, as if he was sharing a secret.

Embarrassment crept into Pepper’s face, growing even hotter. He slowly straightened up, examining Felix’s face. “You— you should go to bed,” he forced out, voice wobbling. 

Thankfully, Felix actually seemed to register what he was saying, and he nodded. His large, clumsy hands tightened around Pepper, securing him as he pulled himself to his feet, leaving the borrower gasping for a few seconds.

Pepper only realized what was happening when Felix made his way over to his bedroom, the borrower held against his chest. “Hang on,” he called, heart racing. “Wait. You don’t need to take me with you.”

Pepper rarely ever entered Felix’s bedroom. Not only was there nothing of use in here that he couldn't find in the living room, but it just felt like an invasion of privacy, even before he had become friends with Felix. He felt guilty being in here while Felix was under the influence and clearly not entirely aware of what was happening.

“Oh— wait, waitwaitwait—”

Felix unceremoniously flopped down onto his bed, cradling Pepper against him and knocking the wind out of the borrower. The world spun for a moment, and Pepper took a deep breath, blinking up at the ceiling. The ground below him was soft and warm. 

“Goodnight, Pepper,” Felix said with a yawn.

His voice had floated from somewhere above Pepper’s head, making the borrower freeze and register exactly where he was.

The soft fabric of Felix’s shirt. The distant heartbeat. The gentle sway of enormous breaths.

Pepper was sprawled out on Felix’s chest, enveloped by a hand larger than himself. The panic that had spiked in Pepper’s body slowly subsided into uneasy breathing, and the borrower attempted to sit up.

“Felix,” Pepper said weakly, squirming. The hand atop of him was heavy, pinning him down effortlessly by its weight alone. “I don’t sleep here.”

“Hmm,” Felix responded noncommittally, the noise rumbling deep in his chest. Pepper’s breath caught in his throat, face warm.

“Felix,” he demanded, trying to twist so that he could look up at the human. He was met by silence, and the slow movement of sleeping lungs below him.

Pepper’s heart continued to pound, much louder than the heart thudding away below him. Felix’s hand wasn’t hurting him, just very slightly pinning him down, cradling him against the warm chest below him. This was the closest he had ever been to Felix in his life.

It wasn’t exactly… uncomfortable.

He tentatively shoved at the hand one more time, then promptly gave up, flopping down with a huff. He stared at the ceiling for a long moment, listening to the idle sounds of the air conditioning and Felix’s breathing, before taking a deep breath and slumping his shoulders. Forcing himself to shift into a more comfortable position, he closed his eyes, sank into the heat surrounding him, and prayed that Felix wasn’t the type to move in his sleep.

-------

YAAAYYYYYY DRUNK GIANTS :DDDDD

I hope you enjoyed this chapter! I had fun writing it :))

TAGLIST: @smallsday @compact-katrina @satethesatelite @taters169 @entomolog-t @gtzel @gt-newbie @da3dm @clumsiergiantess @vee-normous @fee-hunter @torakan

[brainddeadd]

Bang Chan x fem!reader x Lee Felix (poly)

Angst, fluff

“I read this thing once,” Felix started, both his lovers looking over at him. "It said that it's illegal to own just one Guinea Pig in Switzerland."

You instinctively went tease him about it, but Chan silently placed a hand over your mouth. You frowned at him before looking over at Felix, relaxing when you saw the vulnerable look in his eyes, the threat of tears growing behind his lashes.

"I mentioned it to Lino a while ago. Apparently, they get lonely, so you have to get two." Chan smiles softly and moves to hold Felix's hand in his. You move to place your hand over theirs, holding them in place.

"Lino said that it reminded him of us." Felix chuckled, the deep sound reverberating through your chest where you were pressed against him. "Said that he feels like we'd be too lonely without the other."

Felix sniffles, and you look up to him, alarmed to see the tears flowing down his face.

"I thought it was kinda funny, like he was joking." He wipes some tears away with his sleeve. "But then we were fighting and it wasn’t fucken funny anymore. Because it felt like a piece of me was missing."

"Sunshine-" Chan's cut off by you throwing yourself at Felix, before Chan can continue his thought. You're sobbing, always quick to tear up when one of your lovers is sad.

"Sunny, I'm so sorry." You’re babbling apologies, and Felix is sobbing into your shoulder, leaving Chan to comfort the both of you.

"Sunshine, Moonbeam, you need to breathe for me." Chan's trying, but he's got tears in his eyes, and he's at a loss for what to do.

~~

A few hours later, when you've all managed to stop crying, you're just lying down, hand in hand, shoulder to shoulder, staring at the ceiling of your shared bedroom.

"I'm sorry." Chan's the one to break the silence. "I've been so busy lately that I haven't even begun to give you guys the love and attention you deserve."

"Bhang Christopher Chan don’t you dare feel bad for doing your job, that you love." You're shooting up and staring at him incredulously. "This isn't anyone's fault. This is just an accumulation of our busy and stressful lives taking control for a moment."

"Y/Ninie's right, sweetheart." Felix rolls over, so he's staring at Chan's face. "We just need to spend some time together and communicate better the next time our lives get too hectic."

A whimper escapes Chan's mouth, and before he can move to cover his face, you and Felix are crawling over him and pressing into his space.

"You guys never fought before I joined-"

"I'm going to stop you there, Christopher." Felix's voice is stern and slightly terrifying. "You are an important and pivotal member of this relationship. We love you. You love us. You have not fucked anything up by being in a relationship with us."

"You're the love of our lives, Channie." You're going to cry again.

"Don't you dare think we don't need you or want you."

"Sunshine, Moonbeam, I'm going to marry you one day."

[athforskz]

Of Ex's and Oh's - Lee Felix

Masterlist

Requested by anon

Pairing: Felix x reader (afab)

Non-idol au 

wc: ~5.8k

Type: Angst, smut, strangers to lovers

Warnings: Previous heartbreak, cursing, mentions of alcohol/drinking, semi public? (The door is open but no one interrupts) cunninglingus, fingering, edging, unprotected piv, aftercare.

Let me know if I missed any!

semi-proofread

a/n: Your bestie’s name in this is Luna. Chan also makes an appearance.

Enjoy lovelies!

Beep beep

A deafening car horn could be heard outside of your home indicating that your friend, Luna, had just arrived to pick you up. You grabbed the oversized and overpacked suitcase before making your way out of the door and to your friend’s car. She squealed in excitement once you opened the backseat door to stuff your bag next to hers. When you finished struggling, you sat next to her on the passenger side with an exasperated sigh. “I can’t believe you actually managed to drag me out of the house for this.” You said while turning to Luna. 

“Oh c’mon, a trip will do you some good! I couldn’t let my best friend continue to rot in her bed for another 6 months.” She started the car back up and began the drive to the airport. 

“I was not rotting. Just healing…?” You questioned your own statement.

“Y/n, you broke up with your ex over half a year ago. All you did was go to work then go home and lay in bed. You even stopped hanging out with me. If that’s not rotting then I don’t know what is.” She had a point. Nothing you did after the breakup with your long time boyfriend, now ex-boyfriend was healing whatsoever. Still you wanted to take things at your own pace. You’d get back out there eventually, or so you had kept telling yourself for the past couple of months. You know all Luna wanted was to help you get back to your old self. The person you used to be before the toxic breakup, before you had even met your ex in the first place. 

“Okay, maybe I get it. But why Australia of all places? You couldn’t have picked like Paris or something?” You questioned.

Luna shook her head as she pulled into the airport parking lot. It was a short drive from your place. “Well, Australia is beautiful this time of year! Not too cold, but also not blistering hot like it is in the summertime. And Paris is just so… cliche. We needed something different for our first trip out in god knows how long.” She finished explaining.

“Sounds like you did your research at least,” you credited her. 

“Not to mention, Australians are sexy!” She wiggled her eyebrows at you. 

You face palmed shaking your head, “Luna, that is not what I need right now!” 

“What? I’m just saying that the best way to get over someone is to get under somebody else.” She shrugged like it was no big deal. You rolled your eyes as you got out of the car after she had parked. 

Hooking up with a stranger was the last thing on your list. You weren’t the promiscuous type and definitely didn’t plan to start during the trip. 

After grabbing the bags  out of the back you both started your trek through the airport. Passing through security went smoothly and you silently thanked the heavens you didn’t forget your passport. Another 30 minutes passed and soon you were seated on the airplane next to your friend.

“How long is this flight again?” You asked while fishing out headphones from your carryon.

“Hmm, only about 15 hours or so.” She answered.

You choked, “ONLY 15 hours?!” 

“Hey, it was the best deal for a straight through flight.” 

All you could do was let out a groan in response. You put on your headphones and listened to some calming music. Mind as well get comfortable during this long flight, maybe catch up on some sleep. 

Contrary to your intentions you barely got any sleep by the time the plane finally landed. The seats were just way too cramped and uncomfortable. Luna, on the other hand, slept like a baby the entire flight. 

“Ugh I can’t wait to get back to the hotel and relax.” You chimed to Luna while you both waited to retrieve your bags. 

“Oh yeah about that..” she trailed. You simply raised an eyebrow at her, waiting for her to continue. 

“That hotel we looked at was way out of our budget for the nights we picked so I booked us an Airbnb instead.” She finished. 

“Okay, that’s not so bad. I thought you were going to say you forgot to book a place or something.” You wouldn’t put it past Luna to have forgotten something as important as booking a place to stay. She was rather forgetful when she got excited about trips. 

Finally, the rightful suitcases had arrived allowing you and Luna to catch a cab to leave the airport. On the ride to the Airbnb you could tell that Sydney, Australia was beautiful. It may have been nighttime but the way the lights lit up the city was something out of a storybook. 

About 20 minutes later, you had arrived at the destination. Upon looking at the small house it was cute, nothing too fancy. You grabbed your belongings from the trunk of the cab and thanked the driver before racing up to meet Luna on the doorstep. She punched in the key code to open the door. Immediately upon entry the interior was warm and inviting. The house sported an open floor plan with a modern kitchen and living room towards the front of the house. You both made your way past the living room down a hallway that led to two bedrooms and one large bathroom. Luna didn’t hesitate to pick her room, throwing her bags down on the bed as her claim. The rooms were decent size and had a pretty similar vibe overall. Only difference was, Luna's room had an extra window. 

You dragged your bag into the room that was left to you and plopped down on the soft bed. 

“Hey, Y/n! Can you order some food?” Luna called out from her room. As if on queue your stomach growled. 

“Yeah! What do you want?” You pulled out your phone and opened up a delivery app, punching in the address to your temporary place. There were plenty of options to choose from as you scrolled. 

“I don’t know, you pick. I’m down for whatever. Just make sure it gets here quick.” She answered. You giggled, assuming your friend must have been as hungry as you. Who wouldn’t be after such a long flight? You decided on a simple dinner of Thai noodles for the both of you. 

“Food should be here in 20-25!” You yelled out. 

“Perfect. Now which one should I wear?” Luna had appeared at your door holding up two different outfits: a mini dress in one hand and a matching two piece set in the other. 

“Are you prepping for tomorrow or something?” You inquired while pointing to the mini dress.

“Nope. Tonight.” She smiled innocently at you while returning to her room. 

“Tonight?! You’re going out? It’s already late.” You followed her. 

“Correction: WE are going out. And it’s not late, it's only a little past 9pm.” She retorted. 

“Luna, we’ve been traveling all day and I’m tired, all I want to do is eat and get into bed.” You had your arms crossed over your chest.

“We’re only here for 4 days, Y/n. Come on, it’ll be fun! Pleaseeee?” She pleaded with you. 

You pinched the bridge of your nose, “Alright, alright fine. But I’m not taking care of you tonight if you get shit-faced drunk.” You gave in to her begging. Luna jumped over to you to entrap you in a tight hug. “We are going to have tons of fun, you’ll see!” She promised.

Maybe you’d feel a bit more up to it after you got some food in you. Retreating to your room, you rummaged through the clothes in your suitcase to see what outfit you could throw together. You settled on a bustier cami top with black lace detailing, flowy mini skirt, and strappy heels.

Luna and you were in the bathroom doing hair, makeup, and chitchatting when you heard a knock at the door. 

Must be the food, you thought. 

You went to retrieve the meal and set it on the kitchen counter. Luna came out shortly after to join you. You both ate rather quickly, enjoying the meal before finishing getting ready. By the time you had finally gotten dressed you were even sleepier than before. The full tummy hadn’t helped like you thought. 

Nonetheless, you had made an agreement with your friend to go out, plus you were already ready to go. Luna insisted on taking a few pictures to remember the occasion before setting out. 

True to her habits, Luna had forgotten to tell you that you’d be walking to your destination. While it wasn’t freezing cold, the night air was still chilly. You had silently cursed your shoe choice while walking. It wasn’t far thankfully, only about 5 minutes. Once you both made it, you stepped into the bar, immediately being welcomed into the nightlife. The music was loud and the smell of alcohol filled the air. 

All of a sudden you felt uncomfortable, you pulled at your skirt making sure it stayed at about mid-thigh and covered your chest with your arms. You hadn’t been out to a bar since before you started dating your ex. He hated when you went out, always making remarks that you dressed ‘too slutty.’ Your brain was filling with thoughts of him and all you wanted to do was find a way back to your room to curl in bed. 

Luna noticed your turmoil and grabbed your wrist to pull you to a less crowded area near the bar. She placed a hand on your cheek and looked into your eyes asking the silent question if you were okay. You simply nodded your head, not wanting to ruin your best friend’s night already. She turned to the bartender ordering a couple of drinks for the two of you. 

You looked around the place, trying to calm yourself down. It was packed for sure, people dancing and spilling their drinks all over the floor as they bumped into each other. Just then, there was a tap on your shoulder. You jumped, startled but quickly settled when it was just Luna handing you a shot. 

“It’s your favorite! It’ll help you loosen up!” She yelled over the loud music. 

You took the shot from her hand and clinked it against the one she held in her own before the both of you simultaneously drank. Your face scrunched in disgust. Tequila was not your favorite but it was effective. 

After splitting a full sized mixed drink with your friend you did seem to feel a bit more relaxed. You weren’t buzzed, let alone drunk by any means, but the drinks did help in taking away the impending anxiety. However, Luna was a bit of a lightweight and you could already tell she was feeling her alcohol by the way she danced. 

“Stay here, I’ll be right back!” You told Luna, leaving her on the dance floor to return to the bar to get another drink. After this one you’d cut her off. Upon reaching the bar you accidentally bumped into someone. 

“Sorry, sorry! I didn’t see you there.” The man steadied you with a hand on the small of your back. He simply smiled at you with a shake of his head. 

“Don’t worry about it!” He told you. His voice was deep and when you looked up to meet his gaze your eyes widened. He was easily one of the most handsome men you had ever seen. The way his blonde hair framed his freckled face had you mesmerized. His smile was so warm. You pulled your eyes away from him before he thought you had been staring too long. You nodded as if silently apologizing again and turned to order your drink. 

You quickly retreated back to find Luna after getting your order. You found her on the dance floor, talking to a guy. She was always outgoing, but got even more friendly when she drank. You stood next to her observing the man, he actually seemed nice, he wasn’t giving off any creepy vibes and was genuinely interested in their conversation. It didn’t take long for Luna to notice you by her side, “oh this is my bestest friend EVER! Isn’t she hot?!” Your face flushed, did she really just? 

The man laughed at your horrified expression at your friend’s question. You face palmed in response. The three of you continued with casual conversation, you eventually found out the man’s name was Chan. After a few minutes you excused yourself to go to the restroom. When you got back, Luna and Chan were dancing. Her arms wrapped around his neck and his hands on her waist. You didn’t want to intrude and act as a third wheel so you kind of just stood awkwardly a distance away. 

Little did you know a certain blonde man was eyeing you from his seat at the bar. As if in a movie, the crowd of people parted and you turned to meet his gaze for the second time that night. The lights in the bar started flashing to match the beat of the music, the beginning of ‘Carnival’ starting to play. A smirk played on his lips as he finished his glass of whiskey. He got up and made his way over to you. 

“Wanna dance?” He leaned down slightly to whisper in your ear. How could you say no to him? You wordlessly responded to him by pulling him closer and swaying your body to the music. You could smell his cologne and the alcohol on his breath. He himself was intoxicating by his presence alone. 

“What’s your name, Angel?” He asked as his hands caressed your sides. 

“Y/n, what’s yours?” 

“That’s such a pretty name. I’m Felix, nice to meet you, gorgeous!” He kissed your cheek. Your body stilled for a split second as a blush creeped up. 

Do Australians normally greet like this or is he just bold? Maybe he’s drunk? 

He asked a few more questions to get to know you a bit better and in turn you got to know him. You found out that Sydney is his hometown, he’s 23, and he came here with his friend, Chan. You told him that your friend, Luna is currently off somewhere dancing with Chan. You couldn’t remember the last time you’ve had such a good time getting to know another guy. You felt comfortable with Felix to say the least. 

What would he say if he saw you with another man? Thoughts of your ex popped into your mind again. You quickly pushed those thoughts aside not wanting to ruin the moment. 

Another song that you particularly loved came on and you turned around to dance on Felix. Now you were the one being bold. Felix was pleasantly surprised and took the opportunity to put his hands on your hips to dance with you. The sensual tension between you two had increased as the song went on. Felix placed his face in the junction between your neck and shoulder laying a gentle kiss there as he breathed you in. You reached a hand back to run through his soft hair. 

The night continued into the wee hours of the morning. You and Felix had built plenty of tension in the time you had danced together. You had realized it had been a while since you checked on Luna. As much as you didn’t want to stop dancing with Felix you needed to check on your friend. You excused yourself from his hold to find her practically hanging onto Chan. 

“Oh my god, Chan I am so sorry! Luna, how much more did you drink?” You apologized to the man and took your friend from his hold to stand her up straight. All she could do was smile and laugh. Her pupils were blown wide, definitely a sign she was drunk. She stumbled back, but Chan helped you steady her. 

“She only had one other drink after you left.” Chan told you. 

“Dammit, Luna, I told you no more! Come on, we're going home.” You told her while holding onto her upper arm. 

“We can help you!” You heard two voices instead of just one. You looked over to see Felix coming to stand next to Chan. You raised an eyebrow at the both of them. 

“It’s fine, it’s only a short walk from here.” You stated. 

“You walked here and you think she’ll be able to walk back?” Chan questioned while pointing at your ill-balanced friend. 

He had a point. They both seemed nice enough and trustworthy so you took them up on the offer. 

The four of you made it out of the bar. You tried getting Luna to walk straight but it proved fruitless as she kept tripping. Chan took Luna from your hold and hoisted her up to carry her on his back. Luna screamed and laughed at first in her drunken state. You watched as your friend was having such a good time getting a simple piggyback ride. Chan was playing into it, twirling in circles every once in a while and running ahead with the biggest smile on his face. You couldn’t help but chuckle at their antics. 

Felix was walking right next to you brushing the back of his hand against yours. He kept quiet most of the walk back but would give you a reassuring smile when you looked his way. You’d soon realize he was keeping an eye on the surroundings making sure your little group was safe. 

A short bit later, you all had reached the house you and Luna were staying at. You unlocked the door and ushered the others in before you. 

“Do you mind carrying her to her room, Chan? It’s down the hallway on the right.”

“Sure thing.” He kept her on his back and made his way to her room. You could hear her squeal once he dropped her down on the bed. Chan made his way back out to the living room to meet back up with you and Felix. 

“Pretty sure she’s going to pass out any second now.” Chan said. 

“Thanks again, Chan and Felix for walking us back.” You were grateful for their help.

“Ah shit…” Felix whispered while looking at his phone, “All the ride shares are offline right now. Guess we’re hoofing it, Chan.” He patted the older man’s shoulder as they turned towards the door getting ready to leave. 

“Wait! It’s like 3am, how far do you guys have to walk?” You asked concerned.

“Probably like an hour walk at least. Wouldn’t you think?” Felix looked at Chan, he nodded his head to confirm. 

“Absolutely not, you guys are staying here until you can get a ride.” You said matter of factly. 

The boys looked at each other for a moment then back at you. 

“It’s really no big deal, we can-“ Chan started,

“No, no I insist. It’s the least I can offer for getting us back safe.” You interrupted. 

They put their hands up in defeat. You let them know they could make themselves comfortable on the couch and that you’d be in your room if they needed anything. 

Normally, you wouldn’t have even let two men you just met at a bar come into your makeshift home but you were on vacation, they were nice, and you needed help with Luna. 

You went into the shared bathroom to brush your teeth and change into your sleep shorts and top before settling into your room. You kept your door open in case the boys or Luna called out for you. A few minutes had passed and you were sat on the bed brushing out your hair when you heard a knock on the doorframe. It was Felix. 

“Sorry to intrude, I was feeling kind of lonely since Chan fell asleep on me out there. Mind if I come in?” He seemed shy all of a sudden. You offered a soft smile and pat a spot on the bed for him to come sit. He came over to sit at the edge and looked at you sheepishly. 

“I think we’ll be here until sunrise when the ride shares are operational again.” He admitted.

“That’s okay, you guys are more than welcome to stay.” You reiterated while continuing brushing your hair. 

Felix was silent for a moment just admiring you. You got up after a while to get some makeup wipes to clean your face. He followed your movements, watching the way your top rid up slightly to show off the dimples on your back. 

“How come I’ve never seen you around here before?” He finally asked. 

“Luna and I aren’t from here, we came to visit for a getaway.” 

“A getaway? Like a vacation?” 

“You could say that. She was tired of me ‘rotting’ after my breakup.” You were truthful with him. 

“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to pry.” He apologized.

“Don’t be, it’s been 6 months and I need to get over it. Easier said than done though.” You sighed as you got back on the bed, sitting crisscrossed with your back against the headboard. Felix seemed more relaxed now and sat opposite you in the same position. 

“Is that why you seemed distant at times tonight?”  His inquiry made you slightly cringe.

“You noticed, huh?” 

“How could I not? You would tense up and stare into space randomly while we danced.” He gave a light chuckle. 

“My ex just plagues my mind sometimes. I wish I could get him out of my head.” You averted your eyes and shook your head. 

“I can help you with that… if you want.” He proposed. Your face twisted in confusion, you had no idea what he was even offering. 

“How?” 

He approached you slowly and leaned in giving you ample opportunity to move away but you didn’t.

“By making you forget,” he said while brushing his lips against yours. Your breath hitched in your throat as you looked up into his brown eyes. All you could do was nod your head and then he fully connected your mouths. All the tension that had been building throughout the night had led up to this moment. Finally kissing Felix felt so right, it sent sparks throughout your body. 

His hands came up to cup either side of your jaw, his thumbs rubbing over the apples of your cheeks as the kiss deepened. One hand trailed down to your neck giving an experimental squeeze, not enough to choke you but it still elicited a gasp to escape you. Felix took the chance to push his tongue into your mouth and you welcomed it gladly. Already your mind was becoming fuzzy from just kissing him, you couldn’t imagine how else he’d make you feel. 

Felix moved your body down to a more comfortable position as he trailed open mouthed kisses down the column of your throat. His hands moved under your shirt caressing the skin on your waist. 

“Can I take this off, Angel?” He asked in a low sultry voice. You nodded. 

“Words, Angel. I have to hear you say it.” 

“Yes, please,” you whispered.

“Good girl.” He praised before removing your shirt. You didn’t wear a bra to bed normally so your breasts were on full display for him. He leaned back taking in the sight of you. Felix had been staring so long you began getting self-conscious and covering yourself up with your hands, but he stopped you before you could. 

“Don’t hide this beautiful body from me.” He kissed your knuckles then returned to kissing down your throat and collarbone. He cupped your breasts in his hands and squeezed them simultaneously, feeling your nipples harden under his palm. You arched your chest trying to get his hands impossibly closer, but he pulled one hand away quickly replacing it with his mouth. He gave a harsh suck, making you moan out softly. Felix continued his actions, giving the same attention to your other nipple. 

You laid helpless to his mouth’s attacks under him as you reached up playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. Felix continued his descent down your body nipping, kissing, and sucking down your tummy and not forgetting to pay attention to your hips too. He hooked his fingers into the waistband of your soft sleep shorts and dragged them down your thighs, off of your legs. He was now left staring at your panty covered core. You lifted your legs so your knees were pressing up against your chest. Presenting your cunt to him. 

Suddenly, Felix took off his shirt before grabbing your thighs roughly and dragging your body down to the edge of the bed where he kneeled to be face to face with your center. His left hand rubbed the underside of your thighs and your ass as his right hand pulled your panties to the side. A string of your wetness connecting to the fabric of the undergarments. 

“Mm you’re practically dripping. I’m going to enjoy making you a mess.” His voice was somehow deeper as he spoke and that alone made your hole clench around nothing. Felix kissed along your right inner thigh, stopping to blow air over your clit, then going to kiss your left thigh. The sensations were making you squirm. 

“Felix, p-please,” you whimpered. As if answering your pleading, he flattened his tongue against your cunt licking a long fat stripe from your entrance to your clit before wrapping his lips around the bud and sucking. This caused your back to arch off of the bed and a rather loud moan to rip from your throat. Felix detached his lips from your clit to shove his tongue in your pussy. His tongue was covered in your slick as he fucked it into your hole. Your juices covering his lower face and dripping down his chin as you gushed. Maybe he should have put a towel down with how wet you were getting, but it’s too late for that now. Felix retracted his tongue so he could focus on swirling it around your bundle of nerves. You could feel your abdomen tighten as your impending orgasm was washing over you. Your eyes rolled back in your head and your vision went white for a few seconds. Felix practically sucked your pussy clean with lewd wet sounds filling the room. 

You were still coming down from your high as he stood to his feet and quickly did away with his pants. You were finally able to see Felix in all his glory. Toned abs and thighs, his body was breathtaking, his cock even prettier as it was erect at attention. You went to push your panties down but he stopped you. 

“Leave them on, you look good in them, Angel,” he admitted with a smirk. 

You did as he wished, leaving them on. You had relaxed fully on the bed as he got on his knees between your legs. Felix reached over you to grab a pillow from the head of the bed and placed it in front of his thighs. He then grabbed your hips pulling you down so your ass was in his lap and your lower back was supported by the pillow. You propped your legs up on either side of him as you felt he’d be keeping you in this position for a while. Felix took his cock in one hand, pumping it slowly while his other hand came to rub over your pussy. He gave it a couple of light taps with his fingers making your body jolt from the slight overstimulation. Your body is still sensitive from the orgasm his mouth gave you. 

“Hnn c’mon just fuck me already.” You were getting impatient as your neediness grew. 

“Patience, Angel. I’ll give you what you need.” 

His hand adjusted your panties making sure they’d stay in place at the side. Then he placed two of his fingers at your entrance pushing them in agonizingly slow before pulling them back out slightly, making a whimper leave your lips. Felix picked up the pace pumping his fingers into you in synchrony with pumping his cock. He was scissoring you open, prepping you for the stretch of his cock. The way your moans became more whiney coupled with your cunt clenching around his fingers he knew you were about to cum again. 

“I can feel your body, you’re gonna cum again aren’t you?” 

“Y-yes! Please lemme cum, wan’ cum for you,” you babbled out as your hips bucked onto his fingers. Felix kept fingering you, hitting that gummy spot that drove you crazy. He got you so close, right to the edge before he pulled his fingers out. Effectively ruining your orgasm. You whined out in protest. Your high gone from grasp. All you could think about was wanting him to get you there again, to take your body over and over again. 

Right before you could complain about needing to cum, Felix was rubbing his cock through your wet folds. 

“Hmm, your pussy is s’ pretty. All soaked for me. You’re gonna take my cock so well aren’t you, Angel?” He looked into your eyes as his tip was pressing to your hole, but not yet breaching entry. 

“Yeah, s’ well. All f’ you.” You were barely making coherent sentences anymore as if forgetting how to talk. Felix let out a dark chuckle, this is exactly how he wanted you. 

His cock finally pushed in and he gave his hips an experimental roll to make sure he was slotted deep within you. You moaned out at the stretch of his cock as the walls of your pussy engulfed his member completely. Felix gave you time to adjust as he picked up your legs that were previously at his sides to put them over his shoulders, landing gentle kisses to your calves to help you relax. After a bit he started thrusting into you at a slow and rhythmic pace. He swore under his breath at how good you felt while you struggled to keep your moaning under control so as to not wake your friends. The sounds of wet skin smacking against each other didn’t help either. 

Your hands reached out to grab at his legs underneath you and you couldn’t help but dig your nails into his thighs causing him to hiss in return. He steadily picked up the pace while reaching his hand down to rub at your clit. You let out a loud cry of pleasure and he quickly leaned over to capture your lips with his. Swallowing up the moans you were desperately trying to let out. Now that Felix had you somewhat muffled, his pace turned relentless. Pounding into your sopping cunt to hit that sweet spot, his balls smacking against your ass. You tried pulling away to catch your breath and let out your screams but he kept you in place. His arms on either side of your head and mouth slotted against yours. Drinking in every moan, whimper, and scream. Your legs started to shake and he felt your pussy clench hard around his cock as you came again that night. You had never had such a euphoric orgasm before, probably because he edged you. Felix finally removed his mouth from yours and quickly pulled his cock from your soaked hole. He fucked into his fist a few times before hot cum spurted out onto your stomach. His head leaned back as he let out a deep groan. 

You were still suffering from the aftershocks of your orgasm, breathing heavy and vision blurry. 

“Felix… oh, Felix.” Is all you could mutter out. 

He was panting but smiling wickedly as he looked down at you. 

“Yeah, keep saying my name, Angel. That’s all you need to know.” He kissed the corner of your mouth, proud of the delirious state he put you in. Felix got off of you to find something to clean you up with. He soon came back with a warm washcloth and wiped the sticky mess from between your thighs and his cum off of your tummy. He disposed of the soiled cloth then returned back to your bed. He smiled as he saw that you were already sound asleep. A job well done on his part. He climbed into bed, pulling your body up in a more comfortable position to cuddle in. Felix kissed your hair before nuzzling his face into your neck and passing out not too long after you. 

Morning came and the sun's rays shone through the window hitting your face. You stirred awake still in Felix’s hold. You could feel his soft snores fanning over your neck. The previous night’s scene replayed in your head making a blush apparent on your cheeks. You’ve never felt so completely satisfied as you did in this moment. Before you could daydream any longer you’d thought it’d be best to get up and check on your friend.

As you tried to sneakily get out of Felix’s grasp he pulled you back even closer to him. 

“Where do you think you’re going?” He was awake and his morning voice was so deep you barely recognized it as Felix. 

“To put on clothes and check on Luna.” 

“She’s fine, Chan’s got her.” He said.

“Chan is probably still asleep too though.” You remarked. 

“Hm, good point. Just five more minutes at least. You’re so warm.” Felix pleaded. 

You couldn’t say no to him so you settled in for a few more minutes. You turned over to face him and tangled your legs together under the blanket. You and Felix admired each other in a comfortable silence. Felix started to lean towards your lips but you pulled back covering your mouth. 

“Nuh uh, I still have morning breath.” 

Felix let out a half-hearted laugh, “and I still have the taste of your pussy on my tongue, but you don’t see me complaining.” 

Your jaw dropped at his comment and you playfully hit his shoulder. 

“Don’t say shit like that!” You whisper-yelled.

“It’s true. Matter of fact, I could go for seconds.” He said before quickly disappearing under the duvet already yanking your panties down your legs, actually taking them off this time.

“Felix! No get up here, right no- ah!” A squeak left your lips as he kissed your clit.

“Well I need to kiss something since you won’t give me your mouth.” You could hear the smirk in his voice. Before you could protest again he got to work on essentially making out with your pussy. Your sweet moans like music to his ears. 

Damn this Australian man, he was going to be the death of you. 

Thank you for your lovely request anon. Hope it lived up to your expectations!

Likes, comments, and reblogs are much appreciated!

Taglist: @doitforbangchan

[stayxlix]

off the deep end. (07)

~(part seven) the last nail in a shared coffin~

pairing: rebel!felix x reader (f)

genre: non-idol au, post-apocalypse/dystopian au. wc: 20.6k

series rating: 18+ **minors do not interact**

chapter warnings: violent mature themes, explicit sexual content (consensual, unprotected sex, oral sex), nightmares, mentions of murder/death, mentions of parent death, mentions of hunger, oppressive government, fighting, weaponry (knife use, gun use), panic, injury, blood, language, a whole lot lot of angst, please lmk if i missed any!!

a/n: thank you all so much for your patience and continued support, it really does mean the world to mee.<3 any feedback, likes, comments, and reblogs are more appreciated than you know. im so excited to share the next part of this journey with you!! as always, i hope you enjoy.♡♡

series masterlist

"fear and love are like interwoven threads—immutable and bound together by celestial forces. the sun and moon navigate the intricate dance of light and darkness for eternity, echoing the delicate balance between the two emotions that every heart must learn."

Felix had always been able to divide fear into two distinct entities.

The first was immediate, tangible. The kind of fear he’d grown accustomed to like an old, unwelcome acquaintance. The kind that crept beneath his skin when he could no longer ignore hunger’s gnawing ache. When he observed the hollow eyes of his companions after scouring the barren landscape, only to return empty-handed. It was the frigid air that seeped into his bones during long winter nights, the kind that set his pulse racing when footsteps echoed too closely in the darkness. 

The second was deeper, a phantom kind of fear that stained the recesses of his soul. It was a desperate gasp for air in the suffocating grip of hands that devoured the weak. The cool touch of a steel barrel against skin that bore the marks of a merciless world. It was fear in the phantom weight of invisible chains that had once coiled around his neck—chains wielded by demons from a past that clawed relentlessly at the barriers of his sanity.

It was the dread that he would wake up one morning to discover a void where seven—no, eight souls had once stood beside him. To find his humanity stripped away again, replaced by the savage instincts he had fought so hard to overcome. 

The kind of fear that crept into his dreams belonged to the second category.

Nearly six hours had slipped away since the first glimmer of morning light, when you had woken Felix from the nightmare.

"Felix,” your voice—your real voice—not the distorted echo from his nightmare, had called out. Clear and reassuring, summoning him from the depths of his own subconscious. 

“Felix, wake up. You’re dreaming.”

His eyelids shot open, pupils dilating wildly as they struggled to adjust. A sharp gasp pierced the stillness as his body surged forward. Disoriented, his hands instinctively sought you out as he struggled to untangle the threads of the nightmare from reality.

"It's okay,” you whispered, fingers gently gripping his shoulder, "you're safe."

You’re safe, you'd said. And those words, while meant to comfort him, had almost caused Felix to laugh, at the absurdity of the idea that he could ever be tormented by a nightmare involving his own harm.

His head lifted, glossy eyes still clouded with the remnants of fear. Yet, relief began to glimmer within their depths. Because your lips were not stained red, there was no blood-soaked knife clutched in his hand, no imaginary blade pierced through your chest. 

Felix drew in a shuddering breath, reality slowly stitching itself back together. Piece by piece, thread by thread.

You watched him closely, concern dancing in your eyes as you tried to grasp the torment of whatever horrors he had witnessed in his sleep. And then you’d sighed, heavy with affection and a touch of sadness, before shifting closer. 

Your arms enveloped his shoulders and, to his own surprise, Felix didn't resist your touch—though maybe he should have, given what his subconscious had just inflicted upon you. But he couldn’t find the strength to keep his arms from making their way around you in return.

His head dropped to your shoulder, the tension in his muscles easing. Warm touch met cold, trembling skin. The physical contact was grounding—you were grounding. A lifeline anchoring Felix to the reality he so desperately needed to return to. 

He strained to listen until the steady rhythm of your heart found his ear. In the stillness, the sound grew and grew until it was the only thing he heard. Every beat was proof that you were real, breathing and alive. But as the moments stretched Felix began to fear that it might slow, that every beat might be the last before an eternity of silence, that he would look up to find a dagger buried in it once again and—

The air in his lungs became thin, his grip tightened, fingers digging into your back. “I couldn’t do anything," his voice rumbled low, muffled by the fabric of your shoulder. And he didn't even know what he was saying but the words had come out trembling. As if the nightmare had lodged itself in his throat, constricting his vocal cords. 

“It’s okay,” you hushed, your lips grazing his ear in a soft caress. “It’s just a dream, it can't hurt you."

But it's not about me, he thought. It's not about me, it's never been about me. But it remained a silent confession. Because he could not bring himself to tell you the real reason the nightmare had left him so shaken. A quiet truth that hung heavily in the air, tethered to the gruesome image of you that still clung to his mind.

With a gentle tug, you encouraged him to join you in lying back down. Felix hesitated, his gaze falling toward the cave’s entrance—a reminder of the harsh reality waiting outside. But you cupped his cheek and, with a tender smile and the quiet utterance of his name, convinced him to stay. 

Your bodies melded together against the uneven contours of the cave floor. Your fingers threaded through his disheveled hair, tracing the curve of his scalp with each gentle stroke. Another hour might have unfolded as you clung to each other in silence, but it never would have been enough. Time slipped away, ignoring Felix's silent plea for it to slow.

When the rest of the boys began to stir, you shared a hesitant glance. Despite his obvious reluctance for you to withdraw, slowly, gradually, you did. Your fingers left Felix’s hair and his hands slid away from your back. He let you go, eyes following your retreat, and the ache in his chest returned at full force.

As you reclaimed your original spot a few feet away, you stretched, covering a yawn. Your casual expression revealed nothing of the profound moment—the profound night—you had shared with Felix. A night of stolen intimacy, waiting to resurface again in the quiet moments when the world turned its back.

-

As he drove the motorcycle, squinting against the pale brightness, Felix used the sun’s position in the sky to track the passage of time.

Early afternoon, he figured. Maybe eight hours now since the group had abandoned the safety of the cave. And despite the solace he’d found in your touch that morning, a growing shadow of guilt threatened to consume his mind. 

With every hour, the weight of the nightmare's horrors slowly eased, though they never fully vanished. Every time he dared to close his eyes, that agonizing image of you returned—a cruel reminder of the violence he had once been capable of.

The violence that he was still capable of. 

Felix had always recognized his nightmares as a manifestation of his deepest guilt. They had always been sinister—disturbing, and yet, this particular nightmare was unlike any he had faced before. Because he wasn't afraid for himself, he'd never been. But he was terrified for you. Of what he might be capable of doing to you.

Even if Felix knew deep down that he could never intentionally hurt you, there was that persistent voice in his head reminding him of every mistake he'd made, every violent impulse he'd ever had.

His fingers flexed on the motorcycle, feeling as though the handlebars would slip through his grasp at any moment. He squeezed until his knuckled turned white, trying to hold on to some semblance of control. Because Felix was acutely aware of his capacity to lose control. Giving in to that dormant beast lingering just below the surface.

As the nightmare replayed in his mind, Felix couldn’t help but wonder if it had also been a consequence of what he’d said to you that night in the tavern—that you would already be dead if he'd had things his way. Such a careless thing to say considering that, even if he hadn’t known it then, his affection for you had existed in those early moments too.

With every jolt of the motorcycle, Felix fought the nausea that settled in his empty stomach. Caught somewhere between the past and the present, the sensation of your arms around his waist served as a physical reminder of how far he'd come since that conversation. How he'd transformed from someone potentially willing to end your life, to someone committed to protecting it at all costs.

Felix killed the engine and dismounted the bike, muscles rigid from hours of tension. Late afternoon now. Half a day had gone by when the group unanimously agreed that it was time for a break.

As he refueled the bike, its exhaust pipes still crackling with heat, he wondered how long he and Chan were going to ignore the diminishing weight of the fuel containers. But the thought was quickly drowned out by Minho and Changbin—bickering over the now unfolded map.

Felix tuned them out, making note of the way you lingered by his side. He sensed the silent inquiry in your eyes, seeking reassurance about his well-being after this morning’s ordeal. But now wasn’t the place or the time to talk about the nightmare. It was still too heavy, too raw, and to be honest Felix wasn’t sure if he would ever be able to find the words to articulate it all. 

He didn’t even know where to start.

So, despite the solace he found in the quiet strength you exuded, Felix distanced himself from your side. He sought out a flat rock, its cool surface soothing against the back of his neck as he reclined. The setting sun caressed his face, and if he had summoned the courage to close his eyes completely, he thought he might have been able to envision himself back on the rooftop. To the moment Chan had first revealed the plan for the raid—a memory bathed in similar sunlight, when the breeze had carried the scent of a world that felt unrecognizable now.

Felix allowed himself to wonder, only briefly, if he should long for the simplicity of that memory. At a time when he hadn’t felt much of anything at all aside from his love for the seven boys around him. But even that, he had done his best to dull. The numbness had been a shield, but it was a defense he no longer seemed to possess. Because now, every gust of wind seemed to carry the whisper of your name. The moon, a constant observer of his fondest memories and reflections, couldn't even come close to the comfort he found in your embrace. Even the warmth of the sun on his skin could never compare to your touch. Feelings he couldn’t begin to comprehend had taken place of that numbness, battling the darkness that had lingered for far too long.

With a slight tilt of his head, Felix cast a subtle glance in your direction. He found you seated next to Seungmin a short distance away, and he wondered whether you were truly managing the way you’d claimed you were last night. Maybe it was the weariness displayed in the lines of your face, the slight downturn of your lips, the way your shoulders always seemed to carry an invisible weight—things that didn't escape his notice because he understood them all too well. 

Because Felix was beginning to understand you too well, maybe.

After discovering your identity the night of the raid, Felix had done everything he could to convince himself that you were just the daughter of a monster—a pawn in a cruel game. But despite his best efforts, he could never bring himself to see you that way. He'd failed miserably at hating you, he couldn’t even dislike you, and what terrified him most was not just the acknowledgment of his potential to love you, but the possibility that maybe he always had. From the very beginning. From that fateful moment in the alley when your paths had crossed, and your lips had met, and you’d saved his life for the first time.

Of course, he hadn’t known who you were then, he’d had no clue what you might be running from, but he saw the desire to escape it in your eyes. Almost leading Felix to believe that if he'd extended his hand and whispered for you to come with him that night, you would have said yes.

Somewhere nearby, the argument between Minho and Changbin dissipated, fizzling out under the weight of exhaustion or hunger, or the recent encounter with your father's guards—undoubtedly still on everyone's minds.

Felix couldn't help the way his ears perked up when Seungmin filled the silence by engaging you in a conversation about archery, debating the finer points of how to hold a bow. Seungmin—who’d always had a very particular knack for reading the group's dynamics. Whose trust in you was something that hadn't gone unnoticed by Felix, either.

As he immersed himself in the melody of your voice and the subtle accent woven into your speech—how you pronounced words like Minho once had in those first few months after he'd joined the group—Felix allowed his heavy eyes to drift shut.

Even if he'd always been skeptical of it, Felix suddenly found himself clinging to the hope that Chan so fervently believed in—the fragile hope for a better world. And if it really did exist, then he would do anything in his power to make sure you would be there to see it.

He couldn't pinpoint exactly when it had happened—maybe he would try to figure it out some day if he lived long enough—but all he knew for certain was that somewhere along the way, the mere thought of you experiencing harm had become more terrifying to Felix than any of the horrors that had marred his own existence.

And so, he resolved to protect you from the brutality of your world, from the looming threat of the war against your father, and, most importantly, from the darkness that still dwelled within himself.

With a grin, you held the bow aloft. “See? It's all about the grip. If you don't hold it just right, your aim will be completely off."

Seungmin—who you'd quickly come to realize was never one to back down from a challenge—shook his head, streaks of chestnut in his hair catching the sunlight. Rising to his feet, he extended an arm.

“I get that you’ve had official lessons, but you’re missing the point. It's all about intuition and feeling the shot,” he continued as you handed him the bow. “You can have the perfect hold on it any day but if you don't connect with it on a deeper level, you'll never hit the mark.” He mimicked drawing an invisible arrow from the string to emphasize his point.

Intrigued by your banter, Changbin strolled over with a mischievous glint in his eyes. “I don't know, I think it’s more about the stance," with a nudge, he disrupted Seungmin's balance, causing him to stumble. Changbin reached for the bow, and a smile tugged at your lips as the two began to fight over it.

A gentle breeze swept over you, carrying with it the faintest hint of distant pine, and your attention was immediately drawn away.

A few strides to your left, Felix lay reclined with his hands resting comfortably behind his head. His eyes were closed, raven-dark locks absorbing the sunlight. To anyone who didn't know the circumstances, he would have appeared content. To anyone who didn’t know Felix, he might have appeared relaxed, even.

Yet, you wondered what might be taking place beneath that calm exterior.

Felix had felt unusually distant since that morning. His glazed-over eyes seemed to wander endlessly, in every direction but to you. Something had claimed his thoughts, and you could only hope that whatever it was had nothing to do with the torture that had unfolded in his past.

You watched as he ran a hand through his hair—a habitual gesture for the boy with the freckles and the stars in his eyes. The boy with a narrative of scars on his back and a tapestry of secrets in his soul. Secrets you feared you wouldn't have enough time with him to uncover.

The muscles in his forearms flexed as he sat up, fingertips trailing across the stone beneath them. The memory of those fingers on your skin from the night before sent a tingle down your spine, igniting that familiar heat between your legs..

A small pebble came tumbling down the hillside behind you, landing gently on your outstretched hand. Startled, you glanced over your shoulder to find Minho and Jisung making their way back down the rocky incline. "Nothing as far as we can see," Minho reported.

The absence of your father's guards on the other side offered a momentary respite, but it was a fleeting moment of safety that you were well aware wouldn't last forever.

“Nothing for now," Jisung added, meeting your eyes as if he had tuned into your thoughts.

"We should keep moving," Chan appeared at your side, taking in the surroundings. "The longer we stay in one place, the more vulnerable we become."

Sure..unless the path ahead leads to an even greater danger.

Unless your father was paranoid enough to figure out where you were headed.

If he'd sent guards after you on a more direct route, you wondered if they might make it to Miroh before you. The thought of them lying in wait in anticipation of your arrival stirred up a new, particularly unsettling, concern. But when Chan turned his focus to you, you responded with a firm nod, tucking away your fears to discuss with him later.

-

The days were waning, leaving you to realize that summer had quietly begun to slip away. It didn’t take long for the sun to complete its descent below the jagged horizon, plunging the world into shadows once more.

The scattered rock formations took on menacing shapes—their outlines frequently obscured by passing clouds above. Under the veil of darkness, each turn of the wheels became a gamble, increasing the chances of veering off course or stumbling upon unforeseen obstacles.

Amidst the growing danger, Chan's voice cut through the rhythmic hum of the motorcycle as he called for Felix to slow down.

Felix, however, seemed determined to press forward. His muscles tensed, ignoring Chan's plea as the engine roared defiantly. And you had a feeling it wasn't just the desire to reach your destination that drove him, but a reluctance to stop and rest.

To sleep, perhaps.

"Felix,” you urged, leaning in, "it isn’t safe.”

A sudden acceleration of the bike was his only response. It surged forward as if he were trying to outpace not just your words, but the night itself.

You squeezed his waist, a silent plea for him to listen. "Lix—"

In a single, decisive motion, Felix abruptly yanked the motorcycle to the side of the rugged path. With wide eyes, you watched as he stepped down, his movements reflecting restless energy. As the dust settled, he deliberately avoided meeting your eyes, turning his focus to the rover as it pulled up beside you.

"I'll take first watch," he declared, boots crunching on loose rocks as he left your side.

You’d intended to follow him but Hyunjin was quicker. He leaped down from the rover before it’d even slowed to a stop, darting ahead to catch up with Felix.

You watched as they approached the edge of a cliff that lie straight ahead from where you stood. A frown tugged at your lips as your mind went to the twin rings they wore.

I've known Felix a lot longer than you.

As you considered the unspoken dynamic between them, whatever the hell it might be, a shadow fell over the periphery of your vision.

Jisung slipped beside you, his eyes flitting from you to the two figures now seated at the edge of the cliff.

"I spoke with him earlier," you said, eyes tethered to the outline of Hyunjin’s back. "It didn't exactly go well."

"Sometimes Felix gets like this—"

"Not Felix."

"Oh.." Jisung sighed with understanding, following your gaze to Hyunjin. "Hyunjin is protective, especially when it comes to Felix. It's been a long time since someone new joined our group, and considering your.."

"My background.."

"Yeah..that," Jisung mumbled, raking a hand through his hair. “There's history between those two, but it's mostly things that happened before I found my place in the group."

"When did you join the group, Ji?" you turned to face him, dragging your eyes away from whatever was unfolding at the cliff.

Jisung shrugged. "That is a story for another time," he said, flashing his signature grin. "Promise."

You surveyed him for a moment, sensing layers and layers of depth behind his carefree demeanor. His eyes held a narrative waiting to be told, but it was a chapter he wasn't yet ready to reveal. "I'm holding you to it," you replied, and Jisung's smile grew a little wider.

Devoid of any trees or significant cover, the wind howled through the surrounding space, sweeping up from below the cliff where Hyunjin and Felix remained. An exposed campsite meant that, to avoid the risk of drawing unwanted attention, there would be no warmth from a fire tonight. And so, the blankets were spread in a circle on the cold, uneven ground. Pulled close together for warmth.

You settled in, rummaging through your nearly empty backpack, picking at your nails, brushing the dust from your pants over and over again—anything you could to keep your eyes from straying back to the cliff.

Chan claimed the space to your right, handing over a portion of stale bread that was noticeably smaller than usual—a clear indication of your dwindling supplies. But you accepted with a grateful smile nonetheless, pushing down another concern to discuss with him later.

Too much later though, and you may need to start a list.

Unlike the night before, when adrenaline after the chase from your father's guards had fueled the sharing of memories, tonight carried something different. Animated exchanges had been replaced by contemplative silence as the boys seemed lost in their own thoughts behind heavy-lidded eyes. The exhaustion that had been building throughout the day had finally caught up with them, it seemed. And you'd be lying if you said you didn't feel it too.

Your head lifted a bit too eagerly to be discreet when the sound of approaching footsteps reached your ears. A spark of anticipation flickered within you, only to be extinguished as your eyes landed on Hyunjin.

Hyunjin settled down on Chan's other side, their words too hushed for you to catch the details. Slowly, their whispers melted away, a seamless transition from hushed dialogue to the ambiance of rustling blankets and the occasional creaking of the rover.

Your gaze wandered skyward where the stars blinked in and out of view. You watched them for a while, chewing on your bottom lip as you tried to pick out constellations Jisoo had once taught you the names of. Names you had long forgotten, not that it mattered now. Tears pricked at your eyes at the thought of your former best friend, but you didn’t let them fall.

Shifting on your side, you cast a glance at the solitary figure that remained unmoving at the cliff's edge. Moonlight painted his frame in pale shades of silver as he overlooked the expanse below.

The rational part of your mind whispered that you should let him be.

Chan’s body heat would keep you comfortable enough to fall asleep, no doubt about that. And to your other side, Jisung's familiar presence offered an added measure of comfort.

But it was your name Felix had called in his sleep that morning. 

And your heart that had a tendency to rebel against the logic in your mind.

You sat up, mindful not to disturb the sleeping figures around you. The water canteen felt light in your hand as you retrieved it from your bag, quietly making your way to where Felix sat. His head turned in acknowledgment as you approached, and although his expression remained guarded, he shifted to make room for you on the beside him on the rocky outcrop.

It gets easier with time. 

If this was easier than you didn’t want to know what it had been like for him before.

“You should rest. We're safe tonight,” you said through chattering teeth as the frigid earth seeped through the fabric of your clothes.

Daring a cautious glance over the edge of the cliff, the world seemed to disappear. Swallowed by a pitch-black void, the perilous drop was only discernible thanks to scattered dots of flickering light below—tiny beacons of firelight.

Felix shifted, dangling his legs over the edge. “Any one of those fires down there could belong to them."

Them.

The mention of your father's guards stirred up that uneasy feeling in your stomach. Their pursuit would be relentless, safety tonight would never guarantee safety tomorrow. But as you looked to Felix, you knew there was more to it than that. Something had changed since that morning. The distance he'd kept, the guarded look in his eyes—it mirrored the same intensity that gripped him when he'd faced down the man from his past at Yellow Wood.

And it dawned on you that maybe he wasn't referring to your father's guards at all.

You extended a hand, offering him the canteen. "At least drink something if you're going to stay awake all night.”

Felix pressed the cool metal to his lips and took a long, necessary drink before handing it back. “Thanks,” he said, fingers brushing across your own.

As the minutes stretched, the cadence of his breathing created a soothing backdrop. The heat from his body called out to you, a magnetic pull that made sleep even more inviting.

And the next time you opened your eyes, the world had shifted. Your head had found a resting place on his shoulder, your eyes having closed long before the conscious decision to sleep was made.

"You don't have to stay," Felix murmured, a subtle indication that he'd sensed you stir from the drowsy embrace of sleep. His fingers tugged at your jacket, pulling it snug around your neck to fend off the biting cold. "I'm fine, princess,” he added, making your heart flutter at the nickname. “I just don't want to close my eyes right now."

“Do you want to talk about it?” you asked quietly, lifting your head from his shoulder.

"Not really. It was just a dream," he said. But his voice carried a defensive edge, leaving no doubt that it was in fact not just a dream.

“We don't have to..But I can tell its bothering you,” your brows raised in gentle invitation, urging him to share the burden.

Felix stilled before letting out a breath, a hint of frustration taking over the exhaustion in his eyes. "Why do you care?" 

You blinked, caught off guard by the sudden question.

You thought of everything you'd been through—the stolen moments entangled within the danger and chaos, the intimacy you'd shared up to that point.

“I thought it was clear.." you replied, looking away. But as your words hung in the air, doubt crept in. Maybe it hadn't been clear to him that it wasn't only physical for you.

Had you even allowed yourself the chance to fully accept that?

"It's not that simple," he muttered, shifting his gaze back to the distant firelight below. He toyed with the rings adorning his hands, and you tried to ignore which one his fingers gravitated to first.

Vulnerability danced in his expression, and for a heartbeat, the desperate wish that life could indeed be that simple was palpable between you.

Felix reached up to claw through his hair, tugging at the strands. When his eyes finally returned to yours, you realized it wasn't frustration you had seen in them moments ago, but something akin to fear. 

"Felix.."

And Felix winced—he winced at the sound of his name falling from your lips. A subtle movement that might have been imperceptible to most, but painfully evident to you.

“You should go get some sleep,” he stated, jaw tensing with the effort of holding back words begging to be said. The quiet command held a touch of finality, causing a knot to form in your chest.

You took a steadying breath, the crisp night air stinging your lungs.

And maybe you shouldn’t have, but you said, "I care because I see more than the darkness in you, Felix. Those moments from the past that you think define you, they don't. I know you don't see anything good in yourself, but I do."

You set the canteen down beside him with a resounding clang before rising to your feet. "I care because I see someone worth caring for," you sighed. And then, with a slow shake of your head, you cast a final glance over the vast expanse below before turning to walk away.

Had Felix not been broken a very long time ago, your words that night might have shattered him completely. He fought hard to keep his eyes open, determined to avoid the return of the nightmare, but he fought harder against the overwhelming urge to chase after you.

Too many silent hours stretched before him until the sun would rise. Too much time for Felix to wrestle with the echoes of your words—for him to question exactly when he had begun to fall in love with you, and if it really was going to get you killed some day. Leaving him restless and tormented, alone beneath the sprawling canvas of a starlit sky.

The morning unfolded in a haze, draping the landscape in layers of fog that hung low and thick. Changbin had the map spread out on the hood of the rover, tracing the faded lines that marked the outskirts of District 5. "According to this,” he said, “we should be nearing the border of District 4 soon.”

Beside you, Seungmin leaned forward to catch a glimpse for himself. "What do we know about District 4?" he asked.

Changbin disguised any tension in his shoulders with a casual shrug, and it struck you then that you might not be the only one unfamiliar with the outer districts.

Chan tossed an empty supply bag into the back of the rover. "As we go further, we don't stop unless absolutely necessary," he said. And maybe you would've asked him why, if your attention hadn't been drawn to Jeongin at his side. His slender fingers grasped at the frame of the vehicle, strained knuckles betraying his effort to conceal the pain as he noticeably favored his injured foot.

You walked around and dropped an armful of folded blankets into the vehicle, making a mental note to keep an eye on Jeongin.

While the group prepared to continue the journey, the silence between you and Felix pulled at your thoughts, too. You’d hesitated for a moment before climbing onto the motorcycle behind him. His stoic expression, like always, did an exceptional job at masking whatever he was feeling.

Summoning a deep breath, you nudged the thoughts surrounding him to the edges of your mind. The urgency of outrunning the guards, reaching Miroh, an inevitable confrontation with your father some day—there were far more pressing concerns that demanded your focus.

And so, when the motorcycle roared to life you shifted your arms around Felix, intentionally loosening your hold.

If the freckled boy sensed the subtle change, he didn't let it show.

-

The moisture in the air hinted at an impending change.

It wasn't long before thick raindrops began to break free from low-hanging clouds. The motorcycle's wheels fought for traction, skidding on the slick terrain. Puddles formed in the lowest areas as the rain intensified, visibility deteriorating rapidly.

Raindrops pelted Felix's leather jacket as he lifted an arm to shield his eyes from the downpour. Casting a fleeting glance behind, you struggled to discern the faint outline of the rover.

Your head snapped forward again as the bike slipped, threatening to lose balance. With one hand, Felix firmly corrected the course of the motorcycle. His free hand reached out unexpectedly, and you felt the warmth of his touch as he intertwined his fingers with yours. He pulled one of your hands further around his waist, ensuring with subtle pressure that your hold around him was secure.

When he lifted his hand, you maintained the grip, fingers securely entwined.

The rain poured and poured, drenching you both. Yet, steady progress was made. You entered a narrow mountain pass, the landscape unfolding in glimpses as you pressed forward.

Steady progress was made, until the ground beneath you gave way without warning—sending the motorcycle into a sudden descent.

Even with his seasoned reflexes, Felix barely had enough time to react as it plunged downward. The air was stripped from your lungs, a dizzying mix of exhilaration and fear coursing through your veins. Your eyes squeezed shut against the onslaught of wind, and you didn't open them again until—with a jarring thud—the motorcycle reached the bottom of the incline.

The impact sent vibrations through your bones, mud spraying in a messy wave as Felix steadied the bike with a foot.

Rain-soaked strands of black hair clung to his forehead when he whipped around to face you, droplets streaming down his face. “Shit are you alright?!” his voice cut through the thunderous pounding of your heart in your ears.

But you hardly registered his words at all.

Your focus was entirely captivated by what lay over his shoulder.

A vast expanse of towering evergreen trees stretched before you. Tall and imposing, they stood like sentinels guarding whatever secrets lie inside from the rest of the world. The branches swayed as if the forest itself was alive, pulsing with energy that seemed to beckon you closer.

You were almost certain that nothing like this had been marked on the map. And it was massive. A beast all its own.

With a scowl, Felix dismounted the bike, boots sinking into the damp soil beneath. As he approached the forest, you turned to survey the steep incline behind you.

The landscape extended high and wide, like a colossal step down in the earth, stretching as far as you could discern through the curtain of rain. As you studied it, the rover appeared at the top. A sudden apparition against the stormy backdrop, the glimmer of its headlights and the silhouettes of the boys appeared as faint outlines.

Blinking against the rain, you took a few steps over to the foot of the incline. As you strained to comprehend Minho and Chan's growing shouts, Felix materialized at your side. His voice joined the chorus in an attempt to shout back however, like them, his words were swallowed by the storm.

Abandoning their efforts to communicate with you and Felix, the boys leaned together to discuss something amongst themselves.

“What are they doing?” you questioned as the rover began to make a cautious retreat from the edge above.

Felix craned his neck, squinting against the rain. "Probably going to find shelter to wait out the storm, I saw a cave entrance not too far back—"

A brilliant streak of lightning slashed across the sky, illuminating the entirety of your surroundings in a bluish-white glow. The accompanying crack of thunder tore through the air, the sheer force of the noise making your heart lurch in your chest.

Felix lowered his eyes, a softness creeping into his expression upon discovering your hand clasped tightly onto his sleeve. “If they’re going to wait it out, we'll do the same,” he said, taking your hand.

He led you across the tree line, to a colossal evergreen. Its base was substantial, the lowest branches forming a natural canopy like the skirt of a dress—large enough for both of you to slip underneath. His grip on your hand tightened briefly before pulling away. “I’ll be right back. I need to get the bike."

Reluctantly, you let go of his hand. "It’s just a little rain, princess,” he said softly before darting back out in the direction of the forest’s edge.

Beneath the the sheltering branches of the evergreen, you huddled closer to its trunk. Rough bark dug into your back as you pulled your knees up. Thunder rumbled overhead, shaking the earth beneath you.

You shut your eyes—counting the seconds, the breaths.

You thought of a refreshing cave spring echoing with deep laughter, a motorcycle ride underneath the stars. You pictured freckles like constellations, dark eyes reflecting the night sky.

Relief flooded your veins when you looked up to find Felix slipping back beneath the branches.

His shoulder brushed against yours as he sat down beside you with a tired sigh. Stretching his legs out, shadows played on his face as he gazed up through the lattice of pine needles above. “You really don't like storms, do you? You had the same look on your face that night in the tavern.” 

“I’m fine,” you protested, the words coming out sharper than you'd intended.

“So fucking stubborn,” he grumbled under his breath before shrugging out of his jacket. Every flex of his muscles was accentuated by the wet fabric that clung to him.

Not that you'd been staring.

When he draped the jacket over your shoulders, the urge to protest simmered beneath your skin, a lingering effect of your earlier frustration with him. But it was warm, familiar, and for some reason, his scent was more comforting than you'd ever understand.

So, you said nothing. 

Your bent knees found a resting place on his thigh. And beneath the heavy weight of his jacket, the thunder and lightning gradually began to lose their intimidating edge. 

When you crossed your arms for added warmth, your fingers brushed against the handle of your mother’s knife. With a subtle flick, you pulled it out and tossed it into the ground. Your eyes traveled from the gleaming blade to the engravings on the hilt, the dried blood in the crevices. And as you watched the rain wash it away, you were reminded that your father's guards weren't the only thing Felix was running from.

There was a different kind of sinister out there—a malevolence engraved into the scars you'd felt along his back. You'd wielded the knife to free him from one of them, but you weren't naive enough to think that there weren't more out there. 

The mere thought of how many might be hunting him at that very moment sent a spark of something searing up your spine.

Not fear, or sadness, but anger. A raw, primal hatred that surpassed even the disdain you felt for your own father.

“Keep clenching your jaw like that and your teeth are going to shatter,” his deep voice pulled you back from your thoughts. One of his hands found a resting place on your knee. “What’re you thinking about?” Another ominous rumble echoed from somewhere above, and he added, “Aside from the big scary thunder."

You rolled your eyes, sorting through the myriad of thoughts in your head.

Having to relive what you've been through in nightmares.

What I said to you last night.

What we did the night before.

You took a deliberate breath, the scent of rain and earth filling your lungs, and nudged his shoulder with yours. “You first.” 

His head, still resting against the tree, tilted to the side. The way he met your eyes asked, do you really want to know?

When you refused to look away, he sighed. There was a flicker of hesitation in his expression, letting you know he was on the verge of revealing something deeply personal.

“Most of the time," he began, "my memories feel like someone else’s," his throat moved, swallowing down the weight of those memories.

"But there are moments where it all comes back."

Moments. 

Moments, as in those nightmares.

Your next thought slipped past your lips, spurred by genuine concern. “Lix, are you okay? Not just after yesterday morning but..I know you've been through a lot, and..”

"I'm fine, princess," Felix managed a small smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. "If you want to know the truth, in a strange way I’m thankful for the nightmares.”

Because I feel like I deserve them. 

The unspoken words were written all over his face. 

You noticed the subtle tremor in his fingers as they began to tap against your knee. You adjusted your position so that you could look. at him. Really look at him.

His dark eyes, pools of endless regret, met yours. And in them you found a well of profound sadness, a lingering ache from wounds that would probably never fully heal.

A delicate touch trailed from his thumb as he brought it up to caress your bottom lip, gently drawing it back. Your breath hitched in response to the intimate contact. A sigh escaped him as he contemplated..something. And then his thumb retreated, leaving behind a tingling trail of longing in its wake. 

"You wouldn't look at me like that, if you knew everything.”

You frowned at his words, at the sudden shift in conversation and the evident self-loathing in his tone.

Before you could come up with a response, his head crashed back against the tree. “When I asked why you care last night, it's because you shouldn’t," he said.

"What do you mean?”

”I mean you shouldn't be worrying about me or my nightmares or any of the shit I carry with me," he answered immediately. "There is so much you don't know about the way I've lived, the things I've done..I am not who you think I am." 

“Then help me understand,” you urged.

But there was a flicker of something in his expression that suggested he didn’t believe he was worth your understanding.

“You can’t,” Felix emphasized. A distant look clouded his eyes, a flash of whatever it was that had crossed his features after the nightmare seemed to resurface. “You grew up with servants to meet your needs while the rest of us bled for every scrap of food and warmth. You can’t understand, y/n. And even if you could, it won't change who I am or what I've done. The blood on my hands will never wash away.” 

For a moment, the only sound was the relentless percussion of rain on the forest floor. Then, you felt something inside you snap. The princess role, the sheltered naivety that had plagued your entire existence—the pressure from pushing it all down was suddenly released under the weight of his words. 

“Is that all you see when you look at me?" your voice was sharp, edged with years of pent-up frustration. "Just a sheltered princess? Do you think that was my choice? You think I’ve never felt pain, Felix? That I haven’t seen things that will haunt me for the rest of my life?”

You shifted, the jacket slipping from your shoulders and dropping to the mud. “And who are you to decide what I can or cannot understand? You of all people should know that there is more to someone than the history they carry.”

Ignoring the bewilderment in his expression, you stood and pushed through the dense branches, pine needles scratching across your face as you stepped into the open forest. Cool droplets splashed across your skin, mingling with the heat that had begun to fill your veins. Your vision blurred with rain and tears that threatened to spill over—the culmination of years spent hidden away, a lifetime of being taught not to care about anything finally starting to unravel.

Footsteps splashed behind you. “Wait—I’m sorry,” Felix pleaded, his hand finding your shoulder with firm, gentle strength. “I didn’t mean to belittle what you’ve been though," he said, stepping in front of you.

He blinked against the falling rain, freckles glistening. "Please, y/n. I see your strength and I see how much we—I need you. And that terrifies me more than anything because—”

He caught himself, choking on the words. The voice in his head told him to let you walk away, just like he had done last night. But Felix was so goddamn tired of acting indifferent to everything around him. Whether it was the lingering tension between him and Hyunjin, the fact that the nightmares had been devouring him for years, or the way he tried to ignore how losing you would obliterate whatever small part of himself he thought might actually be worth something.

He wasn't tired, he was fucking exhausted. And the fatigue of pretending that he wasn't human was killing him.

Maybe it had been for a very, very long time.

And maybe that is why Felix found himself unable to bear it any longer. The accumulation of secrets, and pretense, and hidden emotions, it pushed and it pressed against his chest until it hurt. And it made him want to live—to experience the complete depths of life that he had been depriving himself of for as long as he could remember.

“When I said you were my weakness, princess. I meant it," he confessed, taking a subtle step closer. "There are very bad people chasing me, and they always catch up. They will again, and I can’t stand the thought of anything happening to you because of me. The things they will do to you if they find out what you mean to me," he took a steadying breath, "I'm only trying to protect you, because what I feel for you is..”

His throat bobbed, preparing to continue. But before he could, you lifted a finger and gently pressed it against his lips. 

With a feather light touch, you traced a path from his lips to his cheek, to his temple and down his jawline. You stopped to caress the sensitive skin on his neck, as if trying to erase the memories burned there beneath your fingertips. 

You felt his warmth, the rapid beat of his pulse.

And you weren’t entirely sure your own heart was beating when you leaned forward to connect your lips with his.

His breath caught, as if not quite expecting it. He kissed you back, applying a tender pressure against your lips before abruptly pulling away. “If you knew what I am capable of—"

“I don’t care what you have done, Felix,” you interrupted, "I. Don’t. Care," you drowned his protests in another kiss, and his lips tasted like rain and longing and everything you were afraid to lose. "I want you, I want every part of you. And if you choose to share your past with me, although I might not fully comprehend it, it won’t change that."

You pulled back and held his gaze. "I am not afraid of you. Pushing me away won't protect me, and I'm not asking you to change, Felix, but I need you to see me for who I am now. Not the person I was expected to be in that palace. I was so broken and alone, and I don't think I even realized it until I met you. And I don't know who I am yet, but I am figuring it out because of you—because of all of you. So don't take that away from me by telling me that I shouldn't care."

As your words settled in the space between you, you decided that Felix had never looked more human to you than he did in that moment.

A lone droplet slid down his cheek, and when you leaned in to kiss it away, the taste of salt lingered on your lips. Revealing something far more profound.

Before you could react, his hands slid to your waist, warm and possessive as his lips claimed yours. He guided you until your back collided with the bare trunk of a dying tree. "I'm sorry," he whispered, thick accent sending shivers down your spine. "I'm not good at things like this, but I care about you, too. Too much, sweetheart. More than I should." The sincerity in his voice resonated with you. He meant the words—truly meant them. "There's nothing I wouldn't do to keep you safe. You know that, right?" he added, thumb brushing your cheek.

And you did. You'd felt it in his touch, when he kissed you, the way he looked at you. You nodded, tracing the contours of his face, "I’m yours, Lix."

The words came out quicker than you could register, but you didn't regret them.

Maybe it made you fucking selfish, to crave losing yourself in him when the entire world was perched upon your shoulders, but you didn't regret them.

"You were always mine," Felix breathed, "before we met, before all of this, you were never their princess," he leaned in, pressing his lips to your forehead. "You were always mine.”

And then, Felix kissed you like he was making up for all of the wasted time before you’d met—for all of the time you would lose when fate inevitably ripped you apart. He kissed you like he had been chasing you through every life before this one, and would follow through every one after.

When he ground his hips against yours, the intensity of his desire was evident in the way he murmured your name. A low, rumbling growl escaped his throat, making you acutely aware of the silence around you. The rain had ceased, leaving only the sounds of your heavy breathing and the occasional rustle of branches above.

When you shifted to grant his wandering hands access to your backside, his boot slipped in the mud. Your lips curved into a smile against his as you realized the absurdity of the situation—how ridiculous you must look shivering and drenched in rainwater, wrapped up in each other like this.

"Smooth," you teased.

Felix responded with a subtle shake of his head, a shy smile playing on his lips. Closing his eyes, he groaned softly and pressed his forehead against yours. "I hate this," he said.

You pulled back, your puzzled expression prompting a low chuckle from him.

"I just wish there was somewhere we could go," he clarified, "somewhere warm and dry," he swiped the lingering raindrops from your cheeks.

"Somewhere we could be alone," you added, lifting your arms to wrap around the back of his neck. "Just us."

Felix hummed in agreement. The desire was reflected in his eyes, a shared longing that resonated between you. But the idea of a place where the two of you could exist peacefully, away from the unforgiving grasp of reality, felt like an elusive fantasy that might always be just out of reach.

Suddenly, as if a switch had been flipped, Felix's expression gave way to a surge of profound intensity.

"Some day," he dropped his voice, "When all of this is over, I'm going to carry you back into that palace." His lips found the curve of your jaw, trailing a heated path down. "I'm going to take my time with you, princess," he nipped at the sensitive skin on your neck, causing your core to flutter with anticipation. "And then," he whispered, "I'm going to lay the world at your feet."

You held your breath as he brought one of your hands to his chest, spreading your fingers out over his beating heart. "Its yours," he said, "and I don't care what you do with it."

With your palm still pressed against his heart, a quiet realization rippled through your mind.

You might love him.

You might be a fool to think there was any part of you that didn't love Felix. And maybe you were a coward, too. Too hesitant to say the three little words hovering on your tongue, for fear that you might become addicted to how it would feel to hear them back.

Your eyes widened as another realization crossed your mind—the understanding that, in some way, loving Felix might always have been inevitable.

And you wondered if he had known it long before you.

Don't let me love you.

You hesitated, the weight of the promise casting a shadow.

But when Felix leaned in to capture your lips with his, the pull between you was too strong to resist. Something cosmic, two souls irresistibly entwined. And you only hoped he could decipher the silent declaration of your emotions lingering in the spaces between each breath.

The kiss deepened into something desperate. Heated and sensual as your tongues collided. A soft, needy sound escaped your throat when he slipped his hands underneath your shirt, cold rings making you shudder. Your arms tugged around his neck, urging him to press his body closer.

Curling your fingers in his hair, you pulled firmly, because you knew how much he liked it.

"Are you trying to get me to fuck you in the middle of this forest?" he said, stifling a groan when you repeated the action.

You laughed—a small, lighthearted chuckle against his lips. "A forest? Never. I prefer caves, actually."

He let out an amused scoff. "Is that so? I'd think someone of such high status like yourself would be into more sophisticated places..like closets."

Your mouth fell open in mock astonishment, a smile playing on your lips as you remembered that night at Clé. "What the hell were we thinking?"

"I know what I was thinking," he responded, leaning in to press his lips to your neck. "I was thinking that you're fucking irresistible," his breath against your ear made your entire body heat up. “That every time I look at you, I want you wrapped around my cock. That when we're with the guys and one of them looks at your ass," he moved his hands around to give a firm squeeze to your backside. “Or your tits," he brought his hands up to grope at your breasts, making you moan. “I want to fuck your pretty pussy in front of them until you're leaking with my cum."

A chill traveled throughout your entire body, covering your skin in goosebumps.

"Then why don't you?” you purred, “fill me up with your cum, I mean," you clarified. Although something about the idea of Felix taking you while the rest of the boy watched stirred up something in your core that you’d never felt before.

“You know why,” he groaned. His adam's apple bobbed as your hands traced along his belt, fingers grazing the skin just inside his waistband.

One of your hands slowly slid down, and you weren't surprised at all to find his already hardened cock pulsing through his pants. The hiss he let out turned to a weak groan when you tightened your grip. And god there was nothing you wouldn't have given to be alone with him and a fucking bed. You needed to taste him, to feel his heavy length on your tongue, stuffed inside your aching cunt.

He started rocking his hips into you slowly, pressing your back further into the tree. "Princess," he dragged out the word against your neck, sucking at the skin. You whimpered in response, head falling against the tree."Do something for me?" he asked.

"Anything," you managed to say.

"Jump."

And you did. Without hesitation you jumped into his arms, locking your ankles around his waist. Felix's eyes sparkled as he turned, surveying the distance between the two of you and the tree you'd taken shelter underneath earlier.

He began to step—but not toward the tree. No, toward the motorcycle beside it.

He lowered you down gently in front of the handlebars before putting his hands on them, closing you in. You recognized the glazed over look in his eyes, and you thought it might be your favorite look of his.

You knew what it meant, and you needed him too.

When your lips reconnected it was fervent. Wild, and raw, and vulnerable. His hand found its way to your neck, making your pussy throb when he lightly squeezed. And your moans mixed when his crotch rubbed against yours, pushing your ass against the front of the motorcycle.

Felix groaned deeply, trying to focus on you and not the growing throb in his dick when you grabbed his hand and shoved it to that needy spot between your legs.

"Felix," you whined, bucking your hips into his touch, "fuck me, please. I don't care where we are, just fuck me."

There was nothing Felix wouldn't have given for the chance to take his time with you. To have the luxury of time without interruption, where the whole entire world would simply fuck off for a few blissful hours. Days, maybe.

But time had never been very kind to Felix. So, without wasting any more of it, he helped you shove down your pants and underwear.

And then, his knees buckled.

He hit the ground and immediately began kissing your inner thighs, moving his face closer and closer to your cunt. And it was when he tilted his head to the side, stopping to look up at you, that you knew you were fucked. The pleasure was already building in your lower abdomen and he hadn't even put his mouth on your pussy yet.

Your eyes squeezed shut as you let out a shaky breath when his tongue finally met your folds, licking a long stripe through them. Felix brought one of your hands to his hair, and you were instantly tangling your fingers in the damp locks. He swiped his tongue in a jagged pattern, brushing his nose against your clit because likes the way it makes you squirm.

He mumbled to himself, something about how good you tasted, before his puffy lips latched on to your clit. You were on the verge of tears, hips jerking when he started sucking on the bundle of nerves, flicking at it with his tongue.

You tightened your grip on his hair, shoving his face against your pussy as your other hand reached for the handlebars behind you, feeling yourself getting closer to the edge.

He brought his fingers up and plunged them inside of you with ease, using them to scissor you open as he made out with your cunt.

“C-close,” you stuttered as his tongue dipped into your hole.

He looked up, and the sight of him on his knees with your arousal glistening on his face, was more than enough to send you over the edge.

Your thighs closed around his head, eyes fluttering shut as the pleasure ripped through you. You moaned his name, pussy throbbing and clenching around his fingers as you came.

Felix smirked against your core, slowing his pace to help you work through the orgasm.

And then, before you'd even had the chance to open your eyes, you were being flipped around and bent over the handlebars. Felix pressed the palm of his hand on your lower back, forcing your body to lean over it further.

Your eyes widened, mouth watering when you heard the clink of his belt unbuckling.

"Gonna take you like this,” he growled, the words rumbling out from his chest. And you were suddenly very thankful for the bike, because it was the only thing keeping you upright.

Felix shoved his pants down, just enough to reach for his thick cock. "Feel what you do to me baby?" He tapped it against your ass a few times before using the tip to spread your folds, gathering your slick.

"Felix," you gasped, swallowing hard. "Don't be gentle."

"Desperate little slut," he cooed, aligning himself with your dripping entrance. "My desperate little slut. Always so good for me, so wet and ready to take my cock like you were made for it."

Without warning, he slammed into you. The full length of him, so heavy and solid and filling you up so well, had your eyes rolling back in ecstasy.

"Oh," you gasped when he landed a harsh smack to your ass.

"Feels good, huh?" Felix smirked, chuckling lowly when you began to vigorously nod your head in response.

"Move, Lix," you cried, "m-move, please move."

And although he'd like to make you beg just a little bit more, Felix physically couldn't hold back any longer. He grunted as he set a steady rhythm. "Pussy's so good, fucking sucking me in baby," he moaned, pushing you further over the handlebars. He picked up the pace when you told him to, burying his face into your neck and sinking his teeth into the sensitive skin.

You emitted a broken, strangled moan when he tugged your head back by the roots of your hair, brain growing foggy with every drag of his cock along your walls. He drilled into you until his thrusts turned sloppy and irregular. When you started fucking yourself back on his dick, his hips trembled, stuttering into yours.

"Princess," he panted, breath hot against your neck, slowing his pace to try and keep himself from spilling inside of you. And Felix thought it might just be the hardest thing he'd ever had to do, when you start to beg for his cum. Whimpering incoherently about how badly you needed him to fill you up with his seed.

"Felix," you cried, feeling your second orgasm building, "feels so fucking good, keep going, keep going, I'm g-gonna—" you whimpered, inhaling sharply as you cum again, tears pricking at your eyes as you cream on his cock.

Felix bit his lip as your walls fluttered around him. His deep moans turned into pretty high-pitched sounds. And he was cursing, words you’d never even heard before, when his hips suddenly stilled.

"Ah, fuck—" he shuddered when he started to spill inside of you. He hurriedly pulled out, wrapping his hand around his pulsating length as he finished in his palm.

When you were coherent and able to feel your limbs again, you turned to look at him.

Felix was panting, chest heaving, as he came down from his own high. His hand was covered in his own sticky release. And you weren't quite sure if it was leftover rain or beads of sweat rolling down his face, but he was beautiful. Lips parted, dark eyes blown wide with pleasure.

He looked up, meeting your gaze with a tired half smile, and it broke something within you.

In that split second, you recognized that you might love him even more than you'd thought. And it was a feeling tainted with a subtle undercurrent of fear—the metaphorical nail in a shared coffin.

Because you're pretty sure it is going to get both of you killed some day.

Imprinted on your skin, Felix's scent mixed seamlessly with the clean breeze that enveloped you upon stepping out from beneath the trees—his warmth a comforting presence at your back.

Something caught your eye, bringing your attention to the top of the incline where the rover had returned, its metallic exterior gleaming.

As you surveyed the narrow drop, a daunting realization began to take hold. The slope stretched on in either direction, leaving no choice but for the boys to make their own descent if you were to reunite.

While you contemplated whether or not the angle might be gradual enough to allow for a cautious descent, Chan's voice rang out from above. “Stay back! We'll come to you!"

Felix cast a worried glance up and down the slope. "It's too steep," his lips tightened into a thin line as the tires inched closer to the edge above.

Charged, electrifying silence filled the air, heightening every detail of your surroundings—the engine's low hum, the rhythmic drip drip drip of water from the branches at your back.

"Maybe they should.." you hesitated, searching for an alternative that didn't exist. But it wouldn't have mattered anyway, because your voice was drowned out by the screeching protests of metal against rock.

With a sudden lurch, the rover initiated its descent.

The first tentative movements sent a cascade of loose rocks tumbling down the slope. The vehicle jerked and swayed in tandem with Chan's adjustments to the wheel, suspension audibly groaning underneath the strain.

Just when it seemed it might conquer the descent unscathed, the air was shattered by a stark crunch as one of the headlights collided with a protruding rock.

The impact sent shockwaves throughout the vehicle, a collective gasp escaping the group as Chan lost control.

In a frantic sequence of events, Minho leaned over, grappling with the wheel to help Chan regain traction. Changbin shot an arm out to grip the open frame, and Jisung buried his head in his hands.

Felix took a shuffling step forward, propelled by instinct to help the boys. Your fingers wrapped around his arm, yanking him back as the rover slammed against solid ground at the bottom of the incline.

The collision resonated through the air, leaving each of you speechless.

Jisung's wide eyes met yours, peering up from beneath the curtain of hair that had fallen into his face at the impact. A disbelieving smile fell across his lips, as if the absurdity of the situation had struck him in that moment. And you couldn't help but return the smile, shaking your head in relief as you acknowledged the collective insanity that had become your reality.

Chan's shoulders slumped and he bowed his head, taking a moment to collect himself. A mere ten seconds passed before he straightened his posture. Stepping down from the vehicle, he crossed his arms over his chest, muttering a curse as his eyes narrowed to the broken headlight.

The rest of the boys disembarked following Chan. Changbin pulled the map from his jacket, taking note of its condition before handing it over to him, and the group gathered around their leader in anticipation.

Chan's brow furrowed in concentration. A moment of disbelief crossed his features before he began to shake his head. "This entire forest isn't even on the map," his eyes lifted to sweep across the endless expanse of trees.

An exchange of looks rippled through the group as you waited for his next words.

"We can waste fuel trying to get around it,” he finally offered, "Or..." his gaze returned to the map.

“Or,” Minho interjected, catching everyone's attention, "we go through it."

The simplicity of his statement held a sense of something bold—a willingness to face the unknown head-on.

The forest did represent the unknown..But it had to end eventually. The fuel was dwindling, every one of you knew it, and wasting it in an attempt to find a way around the forest could be just as dangerous as navigating straight into its heart.

A decision loomed, demanding a choice that balanced the unknown with the practical constraints you faced.

Chan looked to Felix, seeking guidance in the unspoken language they shared. Felix, in turn, redirected his gaze to Hyunjin. The exchange unfolded like a ritual, a pattern the three of them had followed countless times before.

Silent affirmation in the form of a single nod from Felix was all it took for Chan to make the decision. “We go through," he declared.

Jisung cleared his throat, placing a hand on the back of his neck. “It can’t be any worse than what we’ve been through so far, right?”

His attempt at optimism, although appreciated for its intent, was quickly overshadowed by the ominous presence of the trees that loomed behind you.

Changbin squared his shoulders, cocking the heavy weapon in his arms. "Too late to turn back now," he caught your eye, and you nodded in silent agreement along with the rest, his voice echoing endlessly in your mind.

Too late to turn back now.

-

The forest held an ancient energy, a guardian of untold history. The growl of the engines harmonized as they wove cautiously between trees with an undercurrent of something otherworldly, something wild.  

The further the group pressed on, the more it triggered an unexpected wave of discomfort in Felix. His chest tightened as vast horizon was replaced by the suffocating confinement of dense foliage. It brought to light an aspect of himself that he hadn't consciously acknowledged before—how deeply he had come to rely on the open sky and the sense of freedom it provided.

As the familiar feeling of being hunted settled in his bones, his eyes darted anxiously back and forth, scanning for shadows that danced in patterns at the edges of his vision. The words he'd confessed to you about who was chasing him echoed in his thoughts, and he half-expected their figures to materialize from the shadows at any moment—

No.

They couldn't have followed the nine of you out here.

The journey, the logistical challenges it would've taken to track your path through the districts..Not to mention that your group would’ve been long gone by the time they'd realized the fate of the man they'd sent after him at Yellow Wood—the man you'd killed to protect him.

The man whose name was enough to elicit a visceral response from Felix, the scars on his back tingling with every syllable as it resonated through his mind.

"They couldn't have," he muttered under his breath. They couldn't have followed you. They couldn't have.

But what if—

"Felix!" your shout pierced his thoughts, snapping his focus back to the path in front of the motorcycle.

Shit.

The wheels jerked violently as he veered to avoid a large ditch filled with rainwater and mud. The bike danced on the edge of disaster, narrowly avoiding the hidden hazard.

Felix’s eyes widened in realization as he twisted around. “Chan, watch out!” his voice boomed, echoing through the trees, but the warning was futile.

The rover was following far too closely behind.

It's front end plunged first, followed by a moment of suspense before the back wheels followed suit—the mud greedily swallowing them whole.

Despite the churning tires, the vehicle was forced into an abrupt halt. A chorus of frustrated exclamations filled the air, Chan's curses cutting through the loudest as he slammed his hands on the steering wheel in defeat.

You and Felix quickly abandoned the motorcycle, hands pressing onto the muddied surface of the rover. The rest of the boys, excluding Chan and Jeongin, joined you in a synchronized effort to push it out.

Muscles strained, boots sank into the earth, the wheels budged slightly, but despite your collective strength..

Nothing.

Chan unleashed his building frustration by forcefully slamming his foot on the gas pedal once more. The engine responded with a thunderous roar—thick clumps of mud scattering in every direction from the tires, still locked in a futile struggle.

"Chan, stop!" Minho called out, covering his eyes as he stepped back.

Thick sludge splattered across your clothes, adhering to every fiber. You rubbed your eyes to wipe it from your face, and when your vision cleared you realized that the situation had transcended beyond mere inconvenience.

The fading daylight had begun to cast eerie shadows around you. The gravity of your predicament sank in—how utterly alone you were, and it was the first time you thought that might be a bad thing.

Jeongin, confined to the vehicle due to his injured foot, swiveled around to observe the group. He put a hand over his mouth to conceal the sound that escaped his lips. However, what began as a tentative giggle soon evolved, bubbling up from the depths of his chest into hearty laughter. "You guys look awful,” he mused, dimples on full display.

The group exchanged glances, surveying their disheveled appearances.

Hyunjin, in particular, appeared thoroughly offended by his ruined clothing. His disgusted expression only fueled the laughter that had begun to grow around you.

Seungmin protested as Changbin (forcefully) pulled him into a hug, smearing even more mud onto his clothes.

And beside you, Felix's perfect face was seemingly untouched by the mess that adorned the rest of him. It prompted you to swipe some of the mud from your cheek and transfer it to his. The act elicited a surprised, but amused reaction from the freckled boy as the corners of his mouth twitched, his eyes meeting yours with a hint of appreciation for the unexpected playfulness.

Even Chan couldn't stifle a small chuckle as he stole a glance at the group through the rearview mirror.

Surrounded by the laughter of those you had slowly come to trust, you were reminded of what had brought you there in the first place—why it was so important to dismantle your father's oppressive regime for good.

Despite the encroaching night, darkness had yet to fully envelop the surroundings. There was still daylight left. One more challenge was added to the list of those you faced, but there was something about the boys and their resilience that instilled a small sense of hope in you. Making you feel as if their collective strength might just see you through the uncertainties ahead.

And if not, well it was far too late to turn back now.

With the ground unsuitable for spreading blankets, the process of setting camp mainly involved finding patches of drier ground to rest.

You observed the deliberate effort each of the boys made to avoid peering at the rover, the eyesore that it was. Chan was the only one who hadn't left its side, his mind undoubtedly concocting some kind of plan to free it come morning. “Hopefully”, he said to no one in particular as he kicked one of the tires, “we’ll be able to get it out after the mud dries.”

Your fingers fiddled with the laces of your boots, tying them over and over again to divert them from scratching at the drying mud on your skin. With each of you reluctant to waste your precious water supply on a mere rinse, you held on to the possibility that tomorrow's journey might lead you to a stream.

A yearning for the refreshing waters of the cave spring developed within you, intensifying with each passing moment. But it wasn't just the longing for cleanliness that fueled your desire to be back there.

Your eyes darted to Felix, crouched down beside you. Absorbed in concentration, his tongue habitually poked out the side of his mouth as he worked alongside Changbin to start a fire. His dark hair was up, a few strands escaping the confines of the tie to delicately frame his face.

You shook your head, refocusing your on Jeongin seated against a log at the edge of the clearing.

Felix glanced up when you touched his arm gently. His eyes followed your movement as you stood, the soft crunch of leaves beneath your boots resonating in the quiet surroundings.

The mossy surface of the log pressed against your back as you lowered yourself down next to Jeongin. "How're you holding up?" you asked, eyes trailing back to Felix as he returned to work on the fire.

"Could be worse," Jeongin replied softly. You pursed your lips, a moment of silence passing between you before he spoke again. "Can I be honest?"

"Of course," you said, inviting him to share his thoughts.

His fists clenched, fingers digging into the soggy grass beneath.

"Please don't tell the others," he began, quieting his voice. "But if we can't get it out," he gestured toward the rover, "I'm worried about slowing everyone down. I just don't want to be a burden if we have to continue on foot, you know?"

"Jeongin you are not a burden," you were quick to reply, "and nobody is leaving you behind. Whatever happens, we'll find a way to get to Miroh. All of us."

When he failed to respond, you reached out to place a comforting hand on his shoulder. You turned to meet his eyes, and your stomach dropped.

A film of sweat covered his forehead. His complexion had taken on an unsettling pallor, and you guessed that if you were to press your hand to his forehead, it would be burning hot despite the chill in the air.

You fought to maintain a reassuring smile as your gaze swept across the clearing, landing on Minho. He was engrossed in the meticulous task of inspecting and wiping down the remaining firearms with Jisung.

With silent intensity, you begged him to look up.

The air seemed to still as you waited, sounds of the forest fading. When Minho finally raised his eyes to meet your own, the unspoken plea in your expression was clear.

With quick, fluid movement, he excused himself and made his way over where to you and Jeongin sat.

Minho knelt down in front of Jeongin, breaking the tension with small talk as he carefully unlaced his boot. He gently pulled back the bandages to assess the strain on the wound, and despite the stitches holding together well, the surrounding skin displayed signs of inflammation.

Amidst your focus, a sudden grunt of frustration sliced through the air.

Your eyes followed the source of the disturbance to Changbin and Felix. The duo was still locked in a battle with the damp leaves and twigs that refused to ignite—each failed attempt only deepening their shared frustration as the daylight waned.

You stole one more quick glance at Jeongin’s food before rising to your feet. “We need to find dry wood,” you announced.

But you were immediately caught off guard when the deep, resonant timbre of Felix's voice intertwined with Minho's softer tone as they both volunteered to accompany you.

The unexpectedness of Minho's offer left even Hyunjin standing motionless with raised eyebrows across the clearing.

Felix cleared his throat, maintaining his crouched position next to Changbin. A hesitant glance unfolded between him and Minho before he muttered, “Yeah..you two go.”

Minho got to his feet, seemingly unbothered by the reaction he'd caused. Stepping up to your side, he gestured to the forest behind you. "We're losing daylight."

Obviously.

As he strode past you, heading for the trees, you briefly glanced back to the others.

Felix had already returned to the task of trying to coax a spark from the wet kindling. Chan had found his way around the back of the rover—now absorbed in taking inventory of your remaining supplies. Jisung gave you a meaningful look, motioning with his eyes for you to catch up to Minho..

And so, with a determined breath and nothing to lose, you followed the boy from District 9 into the encroaching twilight.

-

It was as if even the forest held its breath, as if it were sentient and fully aware of the undercurrents of tension between you and Minho.

Silence draped between you, thick and uncomfortable, as Minho guided the way. You glared at the back of his head, making note of the distinctive shade of his hair—gray or perhaps a faded light blue, with grown out roots revealing the natural color underneath.

In District 9, it wasn't uncommon for residents to dye their hair various shades—a symbol of status due to the expense of such indulgences. The gradient of Minho's hair made you wonder just how long he had been away from his home district.

Your home district.

As you considered the shared connection between the two of you, Minho broke the silence. “His foot, its..” 

"I know," you replied.

"Infections can spread fast, especially out here.”

“I know.”

Minho sighed in annoyance, as if holding a conversation with you was some sort of burden. “I didn’t want to discuss it with the others,” he snapped.

And it dawned on you that it wasn't the burden of talking with you, but rather the responsibility of his concern for Jeongin that strained his expression. He didn’t want to discuss it with the others because he didn’t want to worry the others. Choosing to confide in you instead.

“What can we do?” you asked softly, although the answer was already clear.

“Not much,” Minho confirmed, “start a fire, boil water to sterilize it with, and..” 

"Wait," you breathed, without missing the way he tensed at the word.

Cleaning Jeongin's wound would be a temporary measure. It wouldn't heal the infection, but it might prevent it from worsening too quickly. Which would give you the time you needed until you got to Miroh where there might be medical supplies. Antibiotics, if you were lucky.

And if not..

“Look," your eyes caught on a fallen tree with branches that appeared drier than the rest. Relief, albeit a small thread of it, weaved through your senses. You pointed to it and began to cross the distance, Minho falling into step beside you.

Together, you began to break off the dead branches. The brittle material snapped easily underneath your grip, the silence interrupted only by the sharp cracking of wood as you worked. But your fingers stilled when you caught sight of that thin bracelet adorning Minho’s wrist. The trinket glimmered softly in the fading light. Its delicate beauty contrasted sharply with your surroundings, reminding you you once again of the life you had left behind—the privileges and sorrows intertwined in your past.

You studied the intricate design and elegance of that gold piece..so out of place.

Why wear it out here, where its value could mean a death sentence?

Lost in the depths of your thoughts, you didn't notice the pause in Minho's own movement. His fingers wrapped around a branch while his gaze bore into you, even as yours remained fixed on the bracelet.

In that moment, a daring impulse seized you. Screw it, you thought. The seething hatred you held for District 9 and the memories it carried ran deep, yet a peculiar sense of comfort washed over you in the knowledge that Minho might understand in a way that the others couldn’t.

For the briefest instant, you allowed yourself to wonder if perhaps Minho shared the same longing for someone who understood.

Screw it.

“If I hadn’t already known you were from District 9,” you started, “that would confirm it.” You brought your eyes from the bracelet to meet his gaze as you resumed your work, snapping another branch.

Minho’s own eyes tinged with something darker than nostalgia as he let out a dry chuckle. “There's no sob story to it, if thats what you’re wondering. No lost loved one, no tragic incident. It's just a piece of metal.” His tone suggested a desire to seal off the conversation, end it there. But your intuition sensed the unspoken pain behind his words.

“If it doesn’t have any meaning,” you pressed, “then why wear it? Isn't it dangerous? Valuable things like that..I’m sure people would kill for them out here.”

Minho’s eyes flitted away, as if trying to decide whether or not to continue. “It did belong to my mother,” he admitted, “but I don’t wear it for her. She was a cruel women and she probably still is. I have no love for her memory."

His gaze returned to yours, firm and resolute. “I wear it because it reminds me of why I left.”

Minho’s sudden vulnerability left you wondering what had changed between you, brow furrowing. “Yes, my family is from District 9," he continued, “and they live comfortably while so many struggle to survive. This bracelet is a symbol of that privilege, of the divide."

“Sounds a lot like more than just a piece of metal to me,” you mumbled, eyeing him cautiously.

A brief pause suggested Minho had shared as much as he was willing. His gaze swept over you, scrutinizing the details of your disheveled appearance. He took in the worn edges of your clothing and the mud-streaked lines on your face, before his eyes landed at the spot on your neck where Felix's mark had once been.

You pulled your jacket up, raising your eyebrows at him.

What?

Minho let out a puff of air from his nose, a sort of half-laugh, half-scoff. The tension in his forehead slowly relaxed, the sharp angles of his expression softening. “I spent the majority of my life in District 9, closer to the palace than you might think," he revealed, "and I never once caught a glimpse of you. There were rumors of your existence, but nobody ever saw you."

A resigned sigh escaped his lips. “I hated every moment of my life there—the constant surveillance, the price paid by those who dared to step out of line. And I think I’m finally starting to understand how unbearable it must have been for you to be confined within those walls. Unseen, unheard, without any idea of what was out here," he gestured to the surrounding wilderness.

The stillness following his words was disrupted by the involuntary snap of a branch succumbing to the pressure of your grasp. Your mouth dropped and you attempted to conceal the subtle gasp that followed, praying Minho wouldn't be able to discern the astonishment you felt.

As your eyes lifted, preparing to articulate the thoughts still struggling for coherence in your mind, your attention was captured by movement just beyond his shoulder.

Amidst the foliage, a delicate tendril of smoke curled upward, spiraling into the sky. You followed the trail down to the source, where a barely visible chimney revealed itself through the trees—an apparent sign that you weren't as alone as you had once believed.

-

You returned to the campsite cradling a bundle of dry branches in your arms. Felix's face lit up at the sight, however his dark eyebrows raised in silent inquiry when he noticed the expression on your face. He accepted the branches as you handed them over, kneeling down beside him.

"Did something happen?" he asked, following the trajectory of your gaze to where Minho was approaching Chan across the clearing.

“We found a small cottage not too far away," you began, helping him arrange the branches. "We didn't get close enough to see if anyone was inside, but there was smoke coming from the chimney.”

A mixture of curiosity and apprehension took hold of his freckled features as you continued. “If someone lives there, there could be medical supplies or something useful for Jeongin's foot."

His eyes drifted toward Jeongin, now dozing off with his head on Seungmin's shoulder.

"He has a fever, Lix," you added with a note of urgency.

Felix swallowed, grappling with your words. "Let's say they do happen to have what we need," sparks flew from the friction of wood meeting wood beneath his hands. He maintained focus, coaxing the flames into existence. "You think they’ll just hand it over to a group of strangers?"

A brief pause followed before he asserted, "They won’t."

"Then we’ll take it,” you answered plainly. Felix’s eyes widened and you emphasized, “Without hurting them.” 

His eyes sparkled as the first glimmer of flames emerged, heart-shaped lips curving into a smile. “Well would you look at that, princess," he mused, "you might just be one of us after all.”

The weathered stone cottage stood as an oddity against the wild, untamed forest.

The towering pines devoured the moonlight, plunging the surroundings in velvety darkness. Beside, you, Felix moved as if he were part of the shadows themselves—someone who had adapted to the darkness in ways you could only begin to imagine.

The two of you—along with Minho, Chan, and Hyunjin—had dispersed around the cottage to get a better idea of who might be inside.

Its circular windows were devoid of curtains or cover, as if whoever resided within had nothing to hide from prying eyes. Flickering light spilled out into the darkness as the scent of burning firewood filled the air—an indicator of the warmth within those walls.

Each step Felix took was guided by muscle memory—a hunter’s instinct, as he left no trail of his passage behind. Darkness seemed to seep from his eyes to combat the soft moonlight. The lethal gleam behind them whispered of his past deeds, reminding you that he was the survivor of a world in which he had been forced into the role of predator rather than prey.

Felix pivoted without a sound, hands delicately grasping your arms. His eyes softened upon meeting yours, acknowledging the fleeting startle he'd caused you. "Stay here," he whispered, a soft command. His gaze lingered on you for a moment longer before he turned back toward the cottage.

You watched with bated breath as he approached one of the open windows. His eyes narrowed, catching on something inside, someone, perhaps—

“What the hell is he doing?!” a voice hissed from behind you.

You whirled around, instinctively reaching for your knife.

“Shit, Chan.“

“I said not to get too close,” Chan continued, disregarding the glare you shot him.

Before you could voice your irritation any further, Felix silently returned to your side. His hand made its way to your lower back, a feather-light touch to alert you of his presence. “There’s a man inside. Just one, from what I can tell.”

The sudden crack of a brittle branch underneath a heavy boot had all three of your heads snapping to the left. Minho and Hyunjin emerged from the shadows, their words echoing Felix's earlier revelation about a single man within the confines of the cottage.

"If he's the only one inside, we might be able to explain our situation and ask for help," Chan said.

Felix withdrew his hand from your back, deftly pulling down the bandana that matched each of your own. The fabric slid down the lower half of his face, unveiling tense features. "We don't know who this man is or what he's capable of.” 

“What if he seems hostile or refuses to cooperate?” Hyunjin chimed in. As his slender fingers adjusted the strap across his chest, the metallic clink of the firearm secured to his back punctuated the air.

The tension thickened as Chan took a moment to contemplate the options. His hand fell to his own weapon, subtly tracing the familiar contours. "Maybe we should wait until morning,” he suggested. And the words, like always, came out laden with the weight of responsibility. “People can be unpredictable. If we wait until morning it gives us the advantage of daylight and more time to assess the situation.”

Impatience flickered across Minho's features, his eyebrows drawing together. "We can't afford to wait," he stressed, "Jeongin has a fever and it isn’t going to improve on its own. If we wait until morning, even a few hours, it worsens that much more. And it will just keep escalating until—"

"Alright," Chan conceded, features softening at the mention of the youngest. “If we're going to do this we need to be cautious. Charging in blindly could make things worse, not only for Jeongin but for all of us.” He swallowed hard, eyes traveling across each of your faces.

"So, what's our plan?" you spoke up, highlighting your commitment to whatever course of action they chose.

"What if we should just knock," Chan shrugged, "it's a simple gesture, non-threatening..”

Felix scoffed audibly from beside you, the sound startling a bird into flight from somewhere above. “Knock?" he lowered his voice to a whisper, "we might as well hand over our weapons while we’re at it."

"Paint targets on our foreheads too," Hyunjin muttered.

Chan shot each of them a disapproving glare. His hand instinctively rose, fingers tracing the scar along the bridge of his nose.

Although walking up and knocking on a stranger's door in the middle of the night did seem a bit absurd, you understood the rationale behind Chan's strategy—an attempt to approach the unknown with some semblance of diplomacy before considering more aggressive measures.

"I should do it," you offered, aiming to sound as indifferent as possible despite the quickening thud of your heart in your chest. "I might seem less threatening, and he might be more willing to talk if he sees me alone."

All eyes suddenly turned to you. Felix stiffened, but Minho intervened before he could protest.

"She has a point,” Minho looked to Chan, “given the circumstances, if he thinks she’s a woman alone in the middle of the night he might be more inclined to trust her and offer aide.”

Felix's expression twisted into a deep scowl, blatantly directed at Minho. "Or take advantage of her," his voice dropped to a near growl.

"That's why we'll be right here,” Chan offered.

Felix restrained himself from voicing any further objections, yet the discontent on his face remained visible. He was desperate to help Jeongin, too. He acknowledged the necessity of the plan, understood the logic, but that didn’t mean he had to like it. 

Hyunjin shifted restlessly. "What if we wait until he goes to sleep?" he said, turning to you, “approaching his doorstep in the middle of the night might raise suspicions."

“So what, you want to break in instead?” you countered.

"It's not like we haven't done it before," Hyunjin snapped.

Your arms crossed as you locked eyes with him in a challenging stare. He gritted his teeth and ran a hand through his golden locks, a self-assured gesture that—as much as you would rather die than admit it—highlighted the way Hyunjin was objectively quite stunning.

As his gaze held yours, there was a slight falter in the sharpness of his stare. Almost hinting that that he had made the suggestion in a discreet attempt to protect you from approaching the man alone.

Almost.

Feeling the weight of the others' eyes shifting between you and Hyunjin, you drew in a breath. "I'll go," you said, addressing Chan. “There’s no way this ends well if we get caught breaking in. If I talk to him, I might at least be able to find out if he has what we need. And if he refuses to help us then we can do what needs to be done for Jeongin.”

Chan nodded. "Talk to him at the doorstep. If things seem off, call for us. We'll be right here, yeah?"

"Just be careful," Felix added quietly from beside you. 

The corners of his eyes creased with worry, but there was trust within them. He reached over to tap on the hilt of your knife, a silent reminder of its presence, and you offered a faint smile in reply.

Aware of the collective gaze fixed on your back, you warily approached the cottage. The sight of Jeongin's fevered state replayed over and over in your mind, propelling every step as you inched closer to the plain, wooden door awaiting your touch.

Lifting a hand, you prepared to rap your knuckles against the weathered surface when an unexpected disruption seized your motion.

Before you could make contact with the door, it began to creak open. The hinges groaned, worn with age, as a sudden brightness flooded out into the night.

Squinting against the intrusion of light, your eyes instinctively dropped to a pair of worn-out leather shoes visible just across the threshold.

“I've been wondering when you lot were finally going to gather the courage to come and talk."

Your head shot up to meet the source of the voice, eyes widening as they settled on the man standing before you. His features were a testament to years spent at the edge of the wilderness. Dark hair, unkempt and graying at the temples, framed a face adorned with a rugged beard. The beard, though not long, carried a battered look, much like the rest of his appearance.

Despite the late hour, there was something peculiar about the way his eyes gleamed, a gaze perpetually attuned to his surroundings. A faint smile played on his lips as he studied your reaction, regarding you with calm curiosity.

Then, in one swift motion, he moved to close the distance between you. You stumbled back, heart drumming a rapid beat in your chest. 

“Come on out!” his voice shattered the night, startling you into a breathless pause. He raised an arm and made a sweeping gesture directed at where the boys were hidden, as if he were inviting them over.

Your mouth fell, the astonishment in your own features reflected by each of the boys as they cautiously emerged from the brush.

The man turned, leaving the door open as he retreated back into the dimly lit interior. "You're lucky you found this place when you did," he said, addressing you over his shoulder.

Hesitant to follow, you lingered in the doorway, absorbing the details of the interior.

Stone walls enclosed the space in a large room, a single hallway extending out of view at the other end. The thatched roof was woven meticulously from bundles of dried straw, forming a gentle slope overhead. A narrow opening ushered smoke from the fireplace into the night sky, and an armchair sat facing the flames, a stack of freshly chopped wood at its feet.

Dry wood.

To your left, a small kitchen area was tucked against the wall. The air inside the cottage was rich with the enticing aroma of something savory bubbling above the rustic stove. It was a scent so captivating that it coaxed you to take a step over the threshold.

As the boys cautiously filtered in behind you, the man settled down at a small table adorned with scattered parchment. His relaxed demeanor made it seem as though he were accustomed to welcoming unexpected, armed guests into his home.

Felix took a deliberate step forward to position himself between the man and the rest of you. His eyes drilled into the stranger, scouring for any sign of ill intent. Despite the absence of a weapon, the way Felix stood made it clear that he didn't need one.

Chan hurriedly moved to join him. His hand found its way to Felix's shoulder, settling on the area where the branded mark lay concealed beneath his clothing—a warning touch. A silent caution to tread carefully.

As Chan visibly grappled with the situation, his mouth opened and closed in a struggle to find the words to start some sort of conversation.

The man chuckled, "You're wondering why I've welcomed you into my home."

The boys stood their ground, but not one of them spoke. They just stared, making you wonder if this was the first time they'd been willingly invited into a stranger's home.

The man leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table. "You’ve been circling my home for the better part of the night. I figure if you'd wanted to kill me you would have gotten to it by now," he said, eyes flicking to the imposing firearm strapped to Hyunjin's back. "But something tells me you didn't come all this way just for a friendly chat, did you?"

“Actually...Uh, sir,” Chan managed to find his voice, but you cringed a bit at the awkwardness it carried. "What we're looking for are medical supplies."

Minho stepped up. "Something to combat infection or fever," he clarified.

The man leaned back in contemplation. He surveyed each of you individually, eyes alight with amusement as if he found the whole situation mildly entertaining.

When his gaze fell upon you, Felix executed a deliberate shift in position. He planted himself directly in front of you, an unmistakable signal that he was fiercely protective of your well-being.

The man's faint smile morphed into a wry, knowing smirk as he looked Felix up and down. "Medical supplies, huh? You all look fine to me," he remarked.

"It's not for any of us," Chan's voice carried a hint of desperation. He paused to gauge the man's reaction before adding, "It’s for our youngest," likely hoping to evoke some sympathy.

The man arched an eyebrow. “There are more of you?"

Minho nodded, "We are a small group, just trying to survive."

"Survival," the man drew out the word, tasting it. “This is not the first time survival has brought strangers to my home in search of help."

"We don't have much to offer in return, but we are willing to trade," Chan offered.

The man's eyes narrowed, probing for sincerity behind his words. "Your friend must be very important to you," he stated, "but trading is not something I require. As you can see, I have everything I need within these walls.”

His fingers began to tap rhythmically against the arm of his chair, an unsettling sound that filled the air as he weighed the value of whatever he was considering.

"Despite that, I will provide you with what you need," he settled on.

A subtle release of tension spread through the room. Minho's stoic facade betrayed a flicker of relief. Chan allowed his posture to ease ever so slightly, Hyunjin withdrew his hand from the weapon strap across his chest.

Yet, amidst the delicate shift in energy, Felix remained an exception. Unmoved by the apparent relief settling in around him, his taut stance, though not overtly aggressive, showed no signs of relenting.

"Go collect your friend," the man waved a hand at the door, "I will shelter you for the night. You're young, exhausted, and it looks like you've been through quite a lot."

Alarm bells should have been ringing in your head.

The whole situation should have been unnerving. And in several ways, it was. But there was an inexplicable aura surrounding the man. Beneath the sly arrogance that colored his expressions, an undercurrent of compassion emerged. As he spoke, you couldn't help but notice the sadness that flitted across his eyes when he took in your group. There was a depth of profound humanity within those eyes—the kind of empathy you had never witnessed in your father—and it resonated with you.

As Chan started to voice his reservations, the man halted him with a raised hand. “I understand the reluctance to trust a stranger. You're cautious, and rightfully so. I see the weapons you carry, I know that you had the means to storm in here and take what you need, perhaps at my expense. Yet, you opted to knock on my door,” he chuckled lightly, shaking his head, "and that tells me something about each of you. Kindness begets kindness. Your group has demonstrated a courage that not many possess. And for that, I offer my aid.”

A stunned silence enveloped the room.

"Thank you," Chan expressed softly, each syllable carrying the weight of collective relief.

While the boys prepared to leave, your focus lingered on the man. A slight limp accompanied his movement as he stood—the permanent mark of an old injury to his left leg.

Felix glided across your path with a gentle brush to your arm, a silent signal to get the hell out of there. He took the lead, aiming to be the first one outside to ensure that there weren't any potential traps or threats awaiting you beyond the door.

Just as you were about to cross the threshold, something prickled at the edges of your senses. A barely perceptible exhale, too close for comfort, brushed against your ear.

The man's raspy voice came as a hushed whisper, intended for your ears alone. “A loyal guard dog you've got there,” he murmured, jerking his chin toward Felix.

You froze.

The blood in your veins threatened to boil at the comparison of Felix to a dog. But there was no malice in his tone, only a recognition of the connection. Almost as if he were measuring your reaction, trying to elicit a response from you.

And so, you willed that surge of heat to simmer.

Suppressing whatever fiery response had been brewing inside of you, you picked up your pace and stepped out into the night.

The decision to regroup and head back to the cottage had been met with skepticism. But, nine against one felt like decent odds, and the weapons your group possessed seemed to tip the scales in favor of the majority.

Upon re-entering the stone walls, you found the atmosphere had shifted. The man—still a mysterious figure with an unnamed identity—was in the midst of preparing something new over the stove.

Shallow breaths escaped Jeongin's lips as he settled into the armchair. The firelight played upon his features, highlighting the film of glistening sweat on his skin.

"I'm making a remedy from the herbs I've gathered,” the man announced from the kitchen. “This will help reduce his fever and fight the infection. Nature provides us with everything we need, if we know how to use it."

He went on to explain the properties of each ingredient he'd carefully measured and crushed. His words suggested a deep connection to the land and its resources. Everything felt genuine enough, and still, your intuition screamed at you to be cautious. A scowl crept across your face as he periodically glanced to you, his earlier comment about Felix ringing in your mind.

The collective watchfulness of the group intensified as the room filled with the soothing aroma of a fragrant tea. "This will help him," the man stated calmly as he poured a cup.

As he approached Jeongin with the steaming amber liquid, Felix's hands clenched into tight fists. The freckled boy focused intently on Chan, as if he were waiting for some kind of signal to release the restrained energy inside of him. The darkness swirling in his eyes hinted that, at the slightest cue from Chan, he would spring into action without a moment's hesitation.

You swallowed. Hard. When the man extended the cup toward Jeongin's lips, a sudden surge of panic gripped you. "Wait—"

Felix flinched sharply beside you, a ripple of tension coursing through his frame. Hyunjin, startled by your interruption, reached for the firearm still strapped to his back. Changbin took an instinctive step forward, ready to shield if need be.

The room held its breath, each of you caught in the precarious balance between conflict and composure.

The man turned, observing each of your faces. A sigh escaped him. A heavy, pitiful sound. And then, he lifted the cup and took a measured sip, his eyes locking onto yours.

“It is safe," he said after swallowing, "I have brewed this remedy countless times for myself." He held the cup out to you, making room for you to take his place beside Jeongin.

Cradling the cup in your hands, the warmth seeped through your fingertips. Jeongin stirred, eyelashes fluttering against the pale flush of his skin as you stepped up beside the armchair.

Feeling the need for guidance, you thought of Chan. Then, Felix. Jisung, an unpredictable force, lingered in your considerations too.

But when your head lifted, it wasn't Chan, Felix, or Jisung you looked to.

Minho nodded in silent reassurance, and it was all you needed to bring the cup to Jeongin's lips.

After he'd taken the last sip of the remedy, you turned and looked the man dead in the eyes as you pushed the cup back into his hands. "If anything happens to him because of this," you asserted, "I won't hesitate to kill you myself."

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Felix's lips twitch upward. And in that subtle expression, you could’ve sworn you detected something that looked a lot like pride.

-

As the night wore on, something incredibly rare began to settle over your group—a blooming sense of trust. The culmination of the day's events, coupled with the comforting atmosphere inside the cottage gradually pulled each of you into a sense of security.

With Jeongin's condition showing signs of stabilizing, Hyunjin and Changbin decided to venture back to the rover to fetch supplies, too wary to leave them out in the open. Leaned against the armchair, Seungmin was first to fall asleep after Jeongin. Minho and Jisung had found solace in each other's presence near the hearth, where the dancing flames bathed their sleeping forms in a subtle glow.

In the midst of it all, Chan had occupied a seat across from the man at the table. They were deep in hushed conversation, discussing matters out of earshot, but the sound of their voices mingling carried an odd sense of security with it.

You found your own sanctuary nestled discreetly in a corner beside Felix. Shielded by miscellaneous objects and shadows, the position rendered you just out of direct eyesight from the two engrossed in conversation at the table.

The firelight played upon the subtle arch of his nose, the gentle curve of his lips, the way his eyelashes cast delicate shadows on his cheeks. Your hand gravitated toward his, and he responded by entwining his fingers with your own.

"I'll stay up with you," you murmured softly, "wasn't planning on falling asleep tonight anyway."

Felix responded with a soft kiss to your temple before guiding you to lie down with him, finding a more comfortable position. He pulled you into his chest and you raised an eyebrow in silent inquiry, glancing to the others. But the freckled boy only grinned as he pulled you closer.

“Sleep,” he murmured softly.

Succumbing to the moment, you laid your head down against his chest, relishing in the comforting beat of his heart.

As his fingers began to trail across your back in soothing circles, you hesitantly draped an arm over his waist, too tired to care about what the others might think—what Hyunjin might think, when he returned to find you like this.

Your mind drifted as you tried to keep the exhaustion at bay.

You imagined waking up to a rooftop bathed in gentle sunlight. You pictured the soft glow of a lantern in a narrow alleyway, reflecting off of sad eyes that carried so much more when they looked to the moon.

The last coherent thing that crossed your mind was the confession you'd been holding back since the moment you'd spent with Felix in the rain.

You might have murmured his name as those three little words resurfaced in your thoughts, but the boundary between wakefulness and dreams blurred.

-

A sudden jolt snapped you back from the brink of sleep, leaving you momentarily disoriented.

Still wrapped in Felix's arms, you anticipated to find him awake when you lifted your head from his chest. However, the features that met your gaze were softened by the gentle embrace of sleep. As your eyes lingered on him, you hoped that he would be granted solace from the nightmares tonight.

You brushed a few strands of hair from his face before sitting up, settling into a watchful position. It couldn't be too much longer now until Hyunjin and Changbin returned.

The rover wasn't that far.

You blinked, trying to regain a hold on your surroundings. As your tired eyes struggled to focus, they fell upon Chan. He now sat leaning against the wall next to the door, a testament to his determination to wait for Hyunjin and Changbin. His eyes were closed, head resting back, chest rising and falling in a slow rhythm—likely never intending to succumb to sleep.

A subtle noise caught your attention across the room, where man stood at a small basin in the kitchen, washing the pot he'd used to brew Jeongin's tea. His back was turned to you, the slight limp in his step evident as he shifted on his feet.

Glancing around the cottage, you made note of the various items scattered about. An aged book sat on a small table next to the armchair. Beside it lay an ornate silver necklace, its chain interlaced with dried white flowers that you didn't recognize.

Across from you, a glimmer reflected off of a small chest on a bookshelf, as if it had been purposefully tucked away amongst the clutter.

Your heart skipped a beat as you focused on the lock—at the symbol engraved on it.

So hauntingly familiar..

You squinted.

And then, your heart plummeted. Right down to your stomach.

You were standing before you'd even willed your feet to move, fueled by sheer instinct as your hand found its way to the knife securely strapped to your waistband.

The blade gleamed as you pulled it out. Your footsteps fell light as a whisper on the wooden floor as you approached the man, tightening your grip on the knife's handle to give you some semblance of control.

His hands, still glistening with water, hovered in the air as he twisted his head to acknowledge your presence.

"Why,” you growled, “does that chest bear the symbol of—"

You stiffened as he turned around, wiping his hands on a thin towel. "Sit," he urged, nodding to one of the two chairs positioned around the table.

“No," you lifted the blade and pointed it directly at him, surprised at how steady it was given the tremor coursing through your body. "Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t—”

"You are correct," he cut you off, "that chest indeed bears the mark of your father's army. But it also carries the weight of my own history."

A chill slithered down your spine as you could physically feel the blood drain from your face. The room swayed around you as you staggered, clutching at the edge of the table to steady yourself.

Despite the shock that painted your expression, the man remained impassive. You stood frozen in place, muscles locked with fear, as he navigated the intimate confines of the cottage to retrieve the small chest from the shelf.

He cradled it in his hands before placing it on the table with deliberate care.

"Sit," he repeated, settling into the chair across from you.

“H-how," you stammered. Your eyes darted over your shoulder to Chan, at the heavy weapon across his lap. But before you could muster the words to call for him, the man spoke again.

“I suspected who you were the moment I saw you standing on my doorstep. Initially, I mistook you for a ghost," he shook his head, voice softening, "the resemblance you bear to her is unmistakable. But it wasn't until this very moment, with that knife in your hand, that I knew for sure."

Without a word, you lowered yourself into the chair across from him.

Pleased with your reaction, the man reached beneath his shirt to reveal a necklace with a dangling key. He used the key to unlock the chest, extracting a worn cloth from within.

The cloth was unraveled to reveal a blade. It was identical to your own in size and shape. Yet, despite the apparent resemblance, the engravings told a different story. Crimson red flowers adorned the handle of the knife in his hand, a stark contrast to the white blossoms etched into your mother’s.

“A lifetime ago," the man cleared his throat, drawing your attention away from the twin blades. "I was a commander in your father's army. But in truth, I was more than that. A confidant, an advisor, and dare I say, his friend. Your father was never entirely sound of mind, even in his youth, but power has a way of magnifying the cracks in one's sanity. ”

He swallowed thickly, as if the following words were difficult to articulate. "I cannot absolve myself either," he confessed, "in the pursuit of my own power and blind loyalty, I too committed unspeakable acts. I followed orders without question, turning a blind eye to the suffering we caused. I assisted your father in making the decisions that stain his hands—decisions that haunt me still.”

"Stop," you croaked. Your chest tightened as you grappled with a rising tide of nausea. And you questioned whether your legs would even hold you if you tried to stand. "How is it even possible that we found you.."

The ghost of a smile crossed his lips. "Fate, my dear, works in mysterious ways," he answered, "and it seems to have conspired to bring you here tonight, to hear my truth."

After a brief pause, he redirected the conversation. "Many years ago, there was a woman, a guide of sorts, known for leading those from the outer districts to District 9 in search of a better life.”

Hira. 

As best as you could, you veiled the flicker of recognition that sparked within you at her mention.

“Your mother was amongst those brought to District 9, to the palace. The moment your father laid eyes on her, he was consumed by a new kind of obsession. Within a week they were married. And the world, entranced by fear of his power, did not dare question it. He bound her to him—not out of love, but in the twisted grip of an obsession with her determination, her beauty, and her strength. Of course, there was also a dire urgency to ensure that his lineage persisted, rooted in the truth that only his bloodline could unlock the secrets of a hidden sanctum nestled deep within in District 2."

"Miroh," you whispered shakily.

He offered a solemn nod. “Your father saw your mother as a means to an end. He stripped away her dreams, her hopes, and caged her spirit. Yet, in the shadowed corridors of the palace, I came to understand her," a wistful smile tugged at the corners of his lips. "She was resilient, even in the face of cruelty. During the stolen moments we shared, she taught me about the outer districts and those we had oppressed. Through her, I learned not just about the struggles of these people, but about love, kindness, and hope.”

The sigh he let out carried the weight of a lifetime. The pain and the tenderness in his words echoed as you recognized that these were the most intimate details anyone had ever shared with you about your mother.

"Months later," he continued, "your mother entrusted me with a secret that would alter the course of our lives. I saw the fear in her eyes when she told me she that was pregnant—the fear that your father could pose a threat to the life growing within her. The following morning, duty dictated that I embark on a routine scouting mission in the outer districts. While I was there, my heart drove me to make a harrowing decision," he closed his eyes and took a steadying breath. "I slit the throats of the guards who had accompanied me. I burned their bodies beyond recognition, and in doing so I faked my own death. I built this cottage and the plan was simple—return for your mother, liberate her from the clutches of your father so that she may raise her child in peace. However, a year elapsed before the circumstances permitted my return. When I finally slipped back into the heart of District 9, under the cloak of darkness, it was only to learn that she had.."

He trailed off, unable to utter the painful conclusion.

Your stomach churned with the deep, unresolved ache tied to the memories of your mother. At the thought of her existence being shrouded in some kind of tragic narrative, and the the crushing realization that you would never know the full truth of her journey because she was gone.

The man's eyes fell to the blade in front of him, fingers tracing the engravings as if seeking solace in their familiar touch. And you didn't even know if you could believe a single word he'd said, but you wondered if he was the one to have given your mother the counterpart.

“I loved her, your mother,” his voice broke. The words hung in the air—dense, and fractured, and he did not look up as he continued.

“I loved her deeply, but in our time spent together I never summoned the courage to tell her those words. I believe she knew it, I know she did, and yet, it haunts me still. It always will. More than anything.”

The sorrow and regret etched on his face told the story of a lifetime's worth of remorse. It was a familiar expression, the same torment you had seen in Felix's eyes countless times before.

You glanced to the freckled boy, his silhouette barely visible in the dying firelight.

And then, another realization struck you. With a tremor of uncertainty in your voice, you turned back to the man. “You and my mother..Did you ever..Is there any chance that you could be my..” the words faltered with the possibility of a truth too profound to fully grasp.

He brought a hand up, rubbing at his face. "I don't know," he shook his head, "your mother and I were together before I left, once. But there is no way to know for certain until you reach Miroh. If you cannot open the lock, if it is my blood that runs through your veins instead of his, then I have damned us all."

The man fixed you with an intense stare. "If he finds you before you reach Miroh,” he quieted his voice to a gravelly whisper, “if he finds you, if the rebellion fails, he will kill them all—“

"I am not afraid of him," you croaked.

"You should be," he warned, "You should be terrified of him. Because he will save that one," he nodded his chin in Felix's direction, "for last. He will draw it out because of the way you look at him. And he will savor it until the bitter end."

His eyes bore into yours, urging you to understand the gravity of his words. "If you love that boy, tell him. Even if you think you may love him, tell him. Before it is too late.”

It was then that you registered the hot tracks of tears on your cheeks.

You were going to be sick.

As the vivid, gut-wrenching image of Felix suffering at the hands of your father seared through your mind, you were going to be sick.

You pushed the chair back, stumbling to your feet.

Desperate to put physical space between yourself and the cruel fate that had been painted before you, you burst outside, gasping for air.

As you doubled over, clutching at your chest, the rhythmic echoes of footsteps reached your ears. There were tears streaming down your cheeks when you turned around to confront the man, ready to demand answers.

But it wasn't his figure that stepped into the dim light seeping from the door.

As Felix took a cautious step forward, the expression he wore told you he had heard everything. Including the very unsettling possibility that your blood might not be the key to Miroh—that the hope every single one of you had clung to might always have been nothing more than just a fragile, fragile illusion.

"What if my blood doesn’t work?” you choked out through tears as he closed the distance between you, the weight of his gaze holding you in place. 

"We don't know for sure yet, okay?”

"Felix," you pleaded his name like there was something he could do. As if he weren't just as helpless as you.

"I will not let anything happen to you," he whispered as his arms enveloped your trembling shoulders. "You're okay. We're okay,"

You shook your head, closing your eyes as Felix gently lifted your chin. "I will not let anyone hurt you," he vowed, traced the path of your tears with his thumbs.

But Felix could sense the panic tightening its grip on you, rendering your breaths shallow and uneven. The ache to alleviate your distress clawed at him. He would've done anything to make it stop. And so, in that vulnerable moment he summoned the courage to articulate the only thing he had left to offer.

“I love you,” he whispered, “I love you, princess. No matter what.”

Felix closed his eyes and pressed his forehead against yours. He reveled in the feeling of his own admission, and it was something even fear could not outweigh. 

You breathed him in.

You knew this would not last forever with him. Nothing ever does. And you wondered if you will ever be able to accept that, even when you no longer have a choice. 

But in that moment, Felix was there. You extended a hand, and he was warm. He was real, and he felt more like home than anything ever had.

You loved him too, and it was a feeling you did not dare let go.

Part 8 coming soon..

thank you so much for reading<33 if you would like to be added to the taglist please don't hesitate to let me know :)

taglist: @astralis-is-typing @skz-streamer @vixensss @yangracha @toplinelix @lixiesw1fe @slytherinatheart @hash2013 @skzswife @xosugardoll @sunnyhonie @skzcollision @hydroyaksha @l1xvanter @nimx9 @ilychee08

[houpss]

𝐃𝐎𝐎𝐌𝐄𝐃

Peiring:: Bang Chan x Hwang Lily (You/Y/n)

!this has nothing to do with real people, only their character and appearance are taken from them, everything that is written is fiction and will never be reality!

complete angst, tears, pain, disappointment, cuts, detailed description. Narration from Lily's point of view (she takes Y/n's place because it's much more convenient to write this way, don't attack me 🙏🏻🙏🏻)

Word count: 3,0K

He did not come again, although he promised so many times.Why didn't Chan come again?Again, again and again. It hurts. Why is he never around when you need him so much...why is he treated so badly, why have you always supported him, you've always been there, even before his debut...You were there at the turning points of Stray Kids and you were there when their popularity skyrocketed, but Chan couldn't say the same. Is it so stupid, maybe? He missed your solo debut, missed your first appearance on the podium, it was so painful. You needed him, you needed his warm smile and a few words of support, but where is he?Every time he fed you promises, every time he wrote short messages: "I'll be there," but never once did you see him in the audience, never once did you hear him talk about your performances.

(08.09.2023) You came home late again, it's Friday night, you were extremely tired and could only hope that Chan was already home. But your apartment with him is so dark and empty. It's so cold in here. You sigh heavily and go into the kitchen, turning on the light there. There was always a huge bouquet of your favorite flowers waiting for you in the kitchen. You're sick of them already.You don't like Lilies anymore.He always gave Lilies. You can feel his perfume around the bouquet, inhaling it with your full chest and deftly take your phone out of the pocket of knee length denim shorts. Suddenly, your hands are shaking, and nausea rises in your throat, you haven't eaten all day because you were invited as a guest to a fashionable event, you were there with Felix, who drove you to your apartment with Chan and brought you right to the apartment door, you were very grateful to Lix for the care. You start texting Chan without thinking:

Lily:Where are you? (10:36 pm)

My Channie❤️‍🩹:At work, Lily, I'm almost always at work! (11:09 pm)

Lily: Today is Friday...You finish earlier (11:10 pm)

My Channie❤️‍🩹:I'll be free in a few hours, go to bed without me (11:15 pm)

You didn't answer him, he wouldn't have read it anyway.He was never distracted while working. You irritably threw the phone on the table and pushed the vase, it rolled on the table, but not enough to break. You were angry at him, you were hurt and hurt, probably you can't do this anymore? You get up and go to the vase at the other end of the table, on a small piece of paper it says: "My beloved Lily", you push the vase from the edge of the table with a light movement of your hand, letting it break on the laminate in the kitchen, the fragments scattered everywhere, deafening the silence of the cold apartment. You are constantly looking at the fragments and the scattered Lilies, how in tune with Lilies and Lilies. An almost hysterical laugh escapes from your lips. The laughter of despair and pain that has been accumulating in you for a very long time.The pain from the shrapnel that injured your legs filled your heart. It was so morally painful, but when the fragments cut through the delicate skin, all the moral pain was transferred to the legs, the heart no longer hurts, it became easier.Pain relieves pain. You watch as scarlet blood flows down your legs, droplets fall on the petals of white lilies. Love is filled with blood. You take off your sweatshirt, remaining in a wide T-shirt, hanging it on the back of a chair and go to the bathroom to treat the wounds on your legs, smearing blood on your slender legs with your fingers.After a few minutes, you manage to gather your senses and you treat minor wounds, it's already half past eleven in the evening, there is still no Chan. No, you're not crying anymore, the tears stopped a few tantrums ago.Your soul is now in a dark and frightening void, you've wandered into the wrong place, girl. Your life was described by the phrase: "Did I miss you?No, only idlers get bored, and I always have a lot of work, you know...Sometimes, though...sometimes I cried, sometimes I winced in pain, as if knives were stabbing into my heart; sometimes I choked with pain, as if your beautiful hands were strangling me; sometimes I couldn't sleep at night, I imagined you; I don't eat practically, I want to become better for you...and so I didn't miss you, I just can't live without you."

Who were you kidding?You love him so much and even with all your desire you will never push him away, you are so weak. You're a fool, Lily.Tears did not come even with all the desire, from the effort to cry you coughed, lightly slapping your chest. After a few minutes, you will still get up and go to the kitchen, you wanted to eat. After dinner, you check your phone again. He didn't write. There's a picture of him on your phone's work screen, he's very handsome. You allow yourself a sad smile. It's already twelve o'clock at night, your bed with Chan is cold, it's cold without him, but you've already got used to it. You check your phone every thirty minutes, your heart is racing, and your mind is telling you to be silent, but is it possible to be silent when you are madly in love?

Lily: Good night Chan 🩷 (12:08 am)

My Channie ❤️‍🩹: Sweet dreams my love (12:47 am)

For a second it warms your soul, but the pain is not less, but only more. you fall asleep with your phone in your hands. What can be done about broken heart syndrome?How could you push away the person who became your world? How can you give up a man who has become your air and desire to live? You didn't know the answers to these questions, but you wanted to know so much. Even in your sleep, your thoughts did not leave you, it was too disturbing a night. By morning, your heart had already broken, tears engulfed you again, you were crying loudly, you couldn't do anything else. When you heard the sound of the door opening, you wiped the tears from your face, but your eyes betrayed you. One .two..Three seconds, the bedroom door opened. Chan was very surprised when he saw you not sleeping, but sitting on the bed with tear-stained eyes and a slightly reddened face from tears. You sobbed even louder at the sight of Chan and his tired appearance.

"What's wrong, Lily?" Chan sat down next to you, gently hugging your shoulders, "You happened," You say it almost unintelligibly, tears streaming down your face, "Chan, I'm tired...I'm tired of this attitude towards myself"

"I really don't understand what you're talking about, Honey..."

"How can you not understand? Do you remember my solo debut?" He nodded, "Do you remember my first appearance on the podium?" nod again, "How many times have I begged you to come, how many fucking times have I asked you for support...How many times have I needed you? Where have you been all these times, where have you been when I need you so much"

"Lily...You do realize that I have a job and I can't always–"

"But I could, right?I've been around every time, I've been around for more than five years! HOW MANY times HAVE I LITERALLY SPAT ON MY LIFE FOR YOU, HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I BEEN THERE WHEN YOU ASKED, I'VE BEEN TO ALL THE PERFORMANCES AND EVENTS...BUT FOR SOME REASON, WHEN I NEEDED YOU, I NEVER SAW YOU IN THE CROWD." You screamed, breaking out of his grip, tears choked your throat, you tried to shout over the pain. Chan was looking at you so sad and sad, and it came out of his mouth: "I'm sorry."

"Why do I need your forgiveness?"

"I will try my best for us" You glance at him as he pulls you against his chest, running his fingers through your hair. As much as you don't want to, you have to say this...

"From this moment on there is no more “we”, now there is me and there is you." You laid your head on his shoulder, it’s too painful to push him away when you love him more than life, he’s your everything, "I'm afraid to say this, but from now on we are not in a relationship." You looked at him with eyes full of pain, he was already crying.

"Please Lily...we can make things better...I promise to be better for you." He placed his hand on your cheek and you pressed your face into his palm. Lily, you really are an idiot. "No, Chan...we can't do this anymore, forgive me."

You kiss his forehead one last time before getting out of bed, taking things from your wardrobe to change into clothes. Chan says something to you, but you don’t hear. You take the already prepared backpack and bag with your most necessary things and look at the man for the last time, frozen on your lips: “Forgive me, Channie.”

He tells you, you don't hear again. You walk past the kitchen, where there are blood lilies on the floor, you feel sorry that you broke the vase. Sorry. You change clothes and leave. Perhaps this is the end of the story?

Separation erased everything, took away with it a part of yourself that remained only a small initially inconspicuous cloud of grief. My heart aches and screams, dripping with tears of inconsolable love. Loneliness filled the space around. The silence seemed to spread through the so quiet streets of morning Seoul, ringing with indifference and a bored chill. He is not there to support, hug and warm up for all the forgotten shortcomings. Instead, there are only broken hopes and regrets that enter into thoughts and offend the soul. thoughts wander in the darkness of the past. The beloved voice sounds in my head, but its warmth is annihilated by the walls of separation. He's not here, and even when you close your eyes in a delusional attempt to bring him back, he remains an unreachable ghost. His presence has moved into a world of fantasies and unfulfilled desires. I had to move on, I had to build a new life and learn to live without a Vat.

You moved into a new apartment, that apartment will stay for Chan. In a new place it is so lonely and empty, there is no more the security and love that was at the very beginning.

He misses you too. The same storm of emotions and bitter thoughts fluttered in his chest. Memories with her rest in a corner of his soul, causing the most difficult feelings. He wants to come back, be near her, feel her warmth on his skin and hear her laugh. But there remains only the sad realization that now all this is just an illusion, where there is no place for reality and general happiness. He ruined everything himself, and Lily deserves happiness, but happiness with him is impossible, he was not created to love. Despair gripped him. A great emptiness arises in his heart, which never ceases to pull at his soul. He cursed himself for every wrong word, every wrong step that had caused this devastating loss. He was banging his head against the wall, trying to figure out why he did what he did. He longed to take back everything they had and make her his again. Become close to my bones, I want you in my heart. In the corner of the room there is a photo album, well worn by time, reminiscent of the past, full of happiness and promises. But now the remaining pages seem to be just another confirmation of the illusory nature of happiness.Chan struggles with numb fingers, trying to rein in the strings of his heart. He swims in an ocean of lost moments and unsatisfied desires, trying to drown the meaninglessness of his pain. But every attempt to get rid of him drives him more and more into a corner, squeezing every cell of his body, opening a painful wound with every breath. It hurts, doesn't it? It was so bad without her. It's his fault.

Three months later.

You even try to move on with your life, you are so busy with work that there is no room for pain, but at night everything comes back. You don’t know how Chan is doing, but you know that SKZ had a comeback in November with the album “ROCK-STAR”, you even watched the video, you liked it. Sometimes you cross paths with members at fashion shows, you give each other glances, but you don’t dare speak. There were already rumors that someone had appeared at the chan, you weren’t surprised. You also tried to fall in love with someone, but the heart that loved Bang Christopher Chan protested.

One evening on New Year's Eve, you were preparing dinner for yourself. By the way, you got a dog who was still just a puppy. Zoey was happily running and yapping around you, and you were preparing dinner when notifications started pouring in on your phone.

Binnie:Lily, I know what's going on with you and Chan, but can you please come? (07:18 pm)

Lily: What's happened? (07:20 pm)

Binnie: Please come and find out everything. Just please come. (07:21 pm)

Your restless soul immediately sensed something was wrong. You turned off the stove and covered the pan with a lid, picked Zoey up and called a taxi. Leaving the puppy at home alone was a bad idea, so you went to the hens' dorm with her. Your heart was pounding, you didn't even really dress nicely.:A black turtleneck, over a black oversize T-shirt and black bell-bottomed jeans. You're in a mournful mood, Lily. You were in a taxi, it took about 20-30 minutes to go. Zoey was fidgeting on your lap and licking your hands.

Maybe something happened to Chan?Maybe it was just a joke? You swallowed and kept looking out the window. Lily, what are you doing? Going to the past is a terrible idea in advance. During these months, You have lived through many events.She tried to keep busy with work, chores and meetings with friends, but her heart remained empty without Chan. She dreamed of him every day, of his kindness, his smile and his hugs. But it's such a stupid thing to dream about someone who did this to you. You drove up to the dorm, Zoey was running ahead of you when you entered the cottage. A worried Jisung opened the door for you, and Zoey burst into the house.

"I'm sorry, Hanni, I couldn't leave her alone at home"

"Everything is great, Lily, come on in" Jisung let her into the house, there was a New Year's atmosphere, but something was wrong.

Hyunjin saw Zoey and immediately started playing with her. "You've finally arrived, Lils...we have a fucking circus here ," Hwang Hyunjin always spoke bluntly.

"What happened...Is this related to Chan?"

Changbin came down from the second floor, he was holding a tray in his hands.

"He gets sick and drinks whiskey, cries..." Changbin put the tray on the table and called Lily over to him.

"Lily...I understand that you broke up, but please go up and talk to him, make him sleep."

"I... I can't"

At that moment, three poor men were looking at you like a shrek cat. It seems that they are already tired of the Chan. You sighed heavily and went up to Chan's room. As soon as you went up to his room, the terrible smell of alcohol immediately hit your nose, you coughed and quietly walked around the cluttered room to open the window a little. You turned on the dim light and sat on the edge of the bed. There, wrapped in a blanket, lay Chan, who also smelled of alcohol, but also pills. His eyes were closed, but he was not asleep, he was as if in a delirium. He was lying on his back, sweat was running down his face, he was frowning and mumbling. You shook your head and went into the bathroom to soak a towel in cold water and wipe Chan's face. When you ran a wet towel over his face, he barely said clearly:"Bin, go away...I don't need help....me..I don't want to live"

You clenched your jaw, you wanted to cry or hit him, he was a fool. You looked at his pale face, brushed his black curly hair from his forehead, barely running your fingers over his face. You wiped his face, neck, and a little bit of his shoulders. His eyes snapped open and he started crying, you didn't know what to do. He probably doesn't even know that you're sitting here.

"It hurts so much, Bin...It's like I'm dead." He closed his eyes again, and you put a cold towel on his forehead.

You got up and started cleaning his room a little bit, threw out all the alcohol, all the garbage and put things in their places. Your heart ached with pain, how stupid everything is. Chan groaned hollowly, and you sat back down on his bed. You put the necessary medications and pills that Changbin brought earlier on the nightstand by the bed. Chan had a fever, so why was he drinking that damn alcohol...why is Chan treating himself like that?

"Go to sleep, Channie, you need to sleep," You said it softly and tenderly, your voice has not been like this for a long time. Chan immediately opened his eyes and raised his head as soon as he heard your voice.

"Oh...I hear your voice...how I missed it" You placed Chan's head back on the pillow. Chan really didn’t realize you were sitting next to him. Happiness is not for us.

"Life without Lily is like hell, I blame myself so much... as if I had committed murder, when she left, I stopped living, I am literally surviving. It’s so difficult without her... but it’s my own fault... I gave her hidden gifts, but it wasn’t enough.” While he whispered through his delirium, you frowned, you didn’t understand what hidden gifts he was talking about. You stroked his head and whispered: “Chan, you need to take a pill.”

He was now truly back to consciousness.

"Lily...god...why are you here?" His eyes filled with tears again and you handed him a glass of water and a pill.

He drank obediently, but still looked at you absolutely normally.

"Don't look like that...Changbin asked to come"

his hands reached out to you, and you grabbed his hands and squeezed them in yours, silently urging him to lie back on the pillows.

"I'm sorry..forgive me...I'm so guilty."

"I tried to compensate for my absence with gifts and meetings that you dreamed of, but this was not enough... I understand, I'm sorry."

The puzzle is complete in your head, it seems you understand everything. He literally did what you wanted, and there was always a bouquet of Lilies because you said you loved Lilies. Lily loves Lily, sweet. He arranged a meeting for you with Donatella Versace, invited you to closed events, gave you the most expensive gifts, but could not be there. You never knew who the gifts were from. Chan even wrote songs for you, but you often forgot to listen to them. So who's bad now? Tears appeared in your eyes, you barely audibly whispered: “I’m sorry...”

He smiled faintly, a smile gracing his sickly face. He pulled you so that you collapsed next to him, your head falling on his shoulder.

"I promise to do better, I promise to be the best for you...just don't leave, please." Chan whispered this with all his might

"Do you really think we can do it?"

"We've missed a lot in five years... but we'll fix everything together, I'll never leave or hurt you again."

""I'm afraid we'll destroy each other...it's like we're incompatible."

"Lily, you are my soul and my love, you are literally all there is...you are my world."

"pain makes us stronger" Lily exhaled and snuggled closer to Chan. It was so strange, but you missed his warmth. You missed me terribly.

"I'm terrible too... I was just afraid, forgive me, forgive me"

Instead of answering, Chan's soft lips touched her forehead. she pressed her cheek to his chest. Chan began to fall asleep when Lily whispered "I still love you, Bang Christopher Chan."

Words of sincere affection filled the room. They spent New Year's Eve sleeping in each other's arms. Perhaps things will be much better next? Perhaps all this suffering will bring redemption?

It may be so stupid to give a chance to something that has ended... but love has not ended, your love for this man will never pass, it’s like a disease has taken over you. You are my first love syndrome.

"You are my last love and last love syndrome, Bang Christopher Chan."–"You are doomed to love me, Hwang Lily."