#Though there's always the off chance I'll just pick it up out of nowhere (sometimes years later)

[violeteyedkiller]

honestly thinking of changing my approach to RP. I mostly find I have attention span for quick one-offs with asks or quick threads related to dash events/commentary or what not. I'm still holding onto my drafts for if I get muse to really crack into them again but

Yeah idk just felt like rambling on my lunch break

[nautilusopus]

Do you have any advice for anyone trying to get into writing?

Not really a motivation thing or anything, just for improvement. Your writing has captivated me, and I felt like it's better to get advice from an author that is reachable than reading a ton of articles online regurgitating the same steps.

Aw, thank you, I'm honoured!

Apologies if this is kind of a mess, I mostly went through stuff I come back to a lot that helps me. Also tumblr seems to have removed the ability to do indented bullets. Fucking great.

In General:

When I'm first starting out writing a story I'm excited about, I usually don't do things in order -- I'll instead pick one scene I can see extremely clearly and am super excited about, one of the things that made me want to write the story to begin with, and then build the entire outline out from there to set it up (what needs to happen to set the scene up exactly how I want it to be? How do I justify that stuff? What would happen afterwards that would add to the scene even more in retrospect?) This not only helps keep the energy going for parts of the story that might not necessarily be fun to plan, but will inherently cause you to start building a story that is either circumstantially or thematically building to something. It can be something as small as a single conversation but it should be the bit that you personally want to see realised most strongly.

On that note, people like when they can see foreshadowing! That's what it's there for! This has been said by other people plenty, but I'll restate it here: the audience potentially being able to piece together your twist after a while is not a failure in writing, it means you put information into a story that allowed them to engage with it and conveyed something that made sense.

I personally sometimes (but not always mostly due to laziness and because I do try to approach shit chronologically so I don't have to double back and do massive rewrites, also due to laziness) like to write big keynote moments of character arcs in full in advance once I have the whole plot more or less laid out. That way, I know what's coming emotionally speaking and can have characters start clearly building up to things, do stuff like plant specific phrases that come back in big ways or are recontextualised later on, and it makes the story feel more cohesive as a whole and helps the scene hit a whole lot harder when you do get to it. Like I said though I'm lazy and I also don't like creating more work for myself if I don't have to, and if by chance the story doesn't shake out the way I thought it would by the time I get to that moment then god is it a pain to rewrite that sort of thing.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Mostly I find it helps keep me focused on where it's going. It's a late stage thing though, I don't start doing this until I'm sure I know how the story will be laid out more or less chapter by chapter, which brings me to:

GO BACK AND CHECK IF YOU HAVE A MIDDLE OF YOUR STORY. ARE YOU SURE? GO BACK AND CHECK AGAIN. This is like the number one pitfall I see basically everywhere across any genre, both with fanfiction and professionally (and in movies always winds up manifesting in reviews as "the movie gets kind of aimless after a while/the third act kinda starts out of nowhere after a really slow part). People have an idea for a strong beginning, the rising action and the big dramatic moment when the stakes are raised, maybe a quiet moment in the middle reflecting on all the tension of the plot and how it's reflecting on the characters, a thing that sets off the end, probably an idea how it ends and how things resolve, et cetera -- and they will forget that at no point did they actually create any connective tissue between their plot development points. Travel! Character beats! The actual events in between big beat A and big beat B, no matter how barebones! Go back and check if you've made any!

As someone that writes a lot of heavily character-driven stuff I'm very biased here, but: in my opinion, if you have good, solid characters, they can carry even the most barebones dogshit story because they are the lenses that the audience is experiencing the world from and through, and whose actions are potentially shaping the course of the story, and of course who the reader is getting attached to. Conversely, even the richest, most lavishly detailed world and story is going to land with a thud if your characters aren't any good and don't have any more to them than making various political developments happen, because at that point you don't have a story with different elements interacting with each other to create events and tension, you have a lore wiki, which is not the same thing as a story. Maybe you could use that for a tabletop RPG, but people aren't necessarily gonna want to read it.

RELATED: JRRT was a linguist and historian first and a writer second. Lore is great and all and can help your world feel like it's a living breathing place, but think about if it's a good detail to include onscreen or not, or if it's just there to "flesh out the world". Stop to consider if this actually has a demonstrable effect on the things happening in front of the reader or not, and if anyone would notice if it were removed outright. Can some things be assumed? What might need to be explained?

Keep an eye on narrative voice versus character voice! If I stripped the dialogue tags from your story, could you still tell who was talking? Does everyone just talk like the narration? Like each other? Like you? Everyone is gonna sound like you at least a tiny bit because you're the one writing it, but at least try to keep an eye on how much you're doing that. It can be pretty boring to just listen to one guy talk the entire time across multiple mouths haha don't look at how long this post is getting shhhhhh

Any story (but especially horror, and especially especially cosmic horror), lives and dies by its suspension of disbelief. The rules don't need to be realistic because it is all made up, and they can be any rules you want, and if you establish them clearly then the audience will buy in as best they can because they want to engage with your story on its own terms (or they SHOULD grumble grumble but that's another discussion and not really something the author can control), but then once you've made them you need to stick to them, or when you do break them it should wind up meaning something.

Suspension of disbelief in horror or fantasy can be trickier, especially when it's something weird and the rules aren't even mechanically sound in their own setting. In that case, the important thing to preserve is emotional stakes the audience can buy into, about how this situation might feel to be in, or if there are any things in real life it might feel similar to. This one's more intuitive than you'd think. Sure, you might not know that the veil of reality is flimsy and all it would take to destroy it all is to get noticed by something much vaster than you could ever imagine; but you probably DO know what it's like to be one missed rent payment from losing everything and realising your safety was really all that never sound. I don't even flinch if someone's head explodes into gore in a movie, but I'll always wince and look away if someone has their fingers crushed or their eye pierced, because even though the violence is lesser I can imagine that happening to me and I don't like it one bit!

Horror can potentially struggle with this pretty badly. Unless you're writing a slasher where the point is to watch some dumb teens bite it, your movie won't actually be scary unless the audience can in some way feel endangered, and they won't be able to do that if what is going on is too disconnected from anything a human could experience. Writers tend to get fixated on making a Really Gross Scary Thing(TM) or Biggest Evilest Threat Evar(TM) and assuming their job is done.

There's no one right or wrong way to do something, but be aware that sometimes things tend to come up in stories a lot for a reason. The tools you have are just tools. Complaining a story has tropes in it is like complaining a tree is made of wood.

That said, if you're thinking of your story entirely in terms of which tropes you want to use, it may be time to take a step back and think about what you actually want to accomplish rather than mushing the same paste into the same holes for the 800th time (more on that later).

Dialogue. If it's something you struggle with, remember that chances are you're a person that knows how to talk, and so you inherently know how to create dialogue. The biggest pitfall I see is people overthinking it trying to "Write Dialogue in this Story" rather than just typing an idea the way they know inherently that it would be typed. If you wanna try and capture a much different voice, spend time listening to people -- and I mean really listening. People double back, correct themselves, trail off, change their train of thoughts in the middle, do more or less of these things when they're in a certain emotional state depending on their personality.

Frankly I'd spend time listening to real people anyway. Spend too much time online and characters wind up sounding like Twitter threads, or worst case scenario you wind up with perfectly articulated ideas and Therapy Speak. A character might not have the vocabulary you, someone who has been online for eighty to ninety years (est) would to convey specific ideas, and not everyone is perfectly self-aware about what they're saying. Someone's probably more likely to say "fuck you I had a bad day" than they are to go "gosh i dislike how much your own success reminds me of how my own mother held me to impossibly high standards so i have very high rejection sensitivity which is why i'm lashing out". Or, again, if someone does talk like that make it mean something. It could be a good example of someone either being insincere and going through keywords to shut someone up, or someone that's very socially awkward giving a rehearsed speech, and those are all potentially interesting ways to then take a story.

(Sidenote because I see this come up sometimes: Hate to single out a single genre here, but anime and by extent video games but mostly anime is a bad place to learn to write dialogue from -- if you're listening to a dub, they had to translate stuff from Japanese and then make it fit lip flaps on a screen, and if you're watching subs, not only were the subs translated but anime trends heavily towards melodrama and Japanese people typically do not speak that way.)

You gotta know the rules before you can break 'em! Read books. Actual books I mean, not just fanfic. Broaden your horizons. When you start breaking rules it will be because it's what you want to do.

Personal nitpicks, some fandom specific and some not. I'm aware some of these are basic but also you never know who might need to hear this stuff so:

Hentai is not a good place to learn about writing actual sex. It's a great place to learn about sex that is following pure porn rules, in which case go nuts and godspeed soldier, but unless you want your scene to come off as either unintentionally rapey or full of nonsensical leaps of moon logic when you're trying to write an otherwise somewhat grounded setting, you should probably read actual books meant for actual adults about fucking, or pull from your own experiences if you're able.

* This isn't advice but I want it known at this point I've seen at least three fanfics clearly written by a middle schooler that's never fucked before and honest-to-god genuinely seems to think some degree of omegaverse is how actual sex works. So that'll be interesting to encounter going forward. If you aren't committing to porn rules (there's that "the rules can be anything you want so long as they're internally consistent" bit again!) do research is my point.

If you started your character creation with their outfit and can tell me their star sign, bust measurements, the four shirts plus jacket plus socks plus shoes they're wearing, the kind of weapon they can summon, eye colour, hair colour, skin colour, height and weight, their agility score versus their magic score, and their favourite ice cream flavour, and yet you have one paragraph about "personality", your focus might not be in the right place and you are making an MMO character. That's fine for something you're going to be staring at the back of for 200 hours but maybe not for someone you're going to need to live inside the head of. Start with personality, and you can tailor all that fun back cover dossier stuff around who that person is and how it would inform the way they dress.

Bad child dialogue is my biggest pet peeve personally and I will immediately put a book down when I encounter it lol. A bigger portion of people are around children than you think and will notice if you've never interacted with a kid before. Children are not cavemen and do not talk like them. The gaps in their vocabulary tend to come from them having a limited amount of it and adapting new phrases into the few existing frameworks they have. This carries over to their psychology, by the way.

Specific to cosmic horror: you can't just make a Gross Thing, your horrors need actual motivations. Nobody cares how big of a squid you can invent, and going "uhhh it's so scary I don't have to bother can't describe it" can only work so many times and is not an excuse to at least not try to describe something. How it makes the characters feel, what the experience is like, whatever. Now, you don't ever have to tell the readers directly what the motivations of your old gods are, but you the writer should come up with some to shape their behaviour so the readers can see the inscrutable ghosts of clear patterned actions that almost make sense yet remain just outside human comprehension oooooooooo. Also readers can generally tell when that's missing and all you have is Large Squid Scary doing random gross shit so it's not an excuse to skimp.

Stop using hair epithets. Stop using hair epithets. Stop using hair epithets. Stop using hair epithets. Stop using hair epithets. Stop using hair epithets. We have pronouns. We have context clues. We have sentence structures that convey what is going on to the reader. We have nouns. If you are going to constantly refer to your character as The Brunette it better be hugely massively goddamn significant that her hair is brown or it's gonna become clear real fast that you just ran out of ways to phrase things and it's gonna take people right out of the story. If the only way you can think of to describe your character in an intense emotional scene is "uhhh this is the one with the brown hair remember I hope you didn't forget" then that's code fucking red. Stop using hair epithets. Stop using hair epithets. Stop using hair epithets. Stop using hair epithets. Stop using hair epithets. Stop using hair epithets.

And the two biggest bit of advice I can come up with for people trying to improve their craft that I give out every time:

1 Have a point. Have a clearly identified reason in your mind about what you want to accomplish with this story. This will help you get your thoughts in order when you are stuck, it will help you outline the story if you're not sure where you want it to go next, it will help other people troubleshoot with you if you aren't sure how to start solving a problem, it will help you make decisions about what and what not to include to help it feel complete, and it will help motivate you when you start to lose track of why you even started this project. Saying "well it's a Vampire AU and I want to do Hurt/Comfort with an ambiguous ending and a BAMF!Scrongus with Soft!Cromgle" doesn't tell me a damn thing, either as a reader OR as someone potentially trying to help you whip the thing into shape. That's a bit like asking, "How do I write a Cute yet Cool character?" like bitch I don't know it's your story there are a million ways to write this stuff and yes that is a real question I got asked once.

Instead, have an actual, identifiable goal that is personal to you, what you want to write, and what you have to say. That can be anything from "I have a lot of strong opinions about why gender is, across the breadth of experiences possible with human consciousness, a zero sum game that must be internally and deliberately engaged with before one is then able to determine their own relationship to it" to "oh man i love the idea of Mark from Accounts Receivable one day going apeshit and beating Jake from Auditing half to death with an office chair and the fallout that would generate and maybe also someone FINALLY FINALLY asks him for the first time 'hey dude are you okay do you wanna talk'" to "god it'd be so hot if this guy were bent over a pool table drooling onto the velvet and i am going to do everything in my power to facilitate that somehow". Either way, clear mission statement and goal that isn't just telling me what tags you're slapping on the finished product! If you have that kind of clarity of vision it will come across in your piece and resonate with people because it's a complete thought that the work is able to deliberately showcase, instead of just churning out Content™ that fits certain templates that are popular, even if you like said templates. What do you have to say? Why did this idea stick in your brain so hard you had to write it down and tell the world about it? What parts of it especially did you want to convey so badly? Show us!

2 Writing is vulnerability by proxy. Until we get the technology for brain uploading, you are only going to ever be you in your own head with your own thoughts, experiences, biases, and worldviews. If you think you can write something without exposing a lot of really revealing shit about yourself to an audience that notices it, perish that thought now. Quentin Tarantino and HP Lovecraft weren't slick about it and you won't be either. This is neither a bad thing or a good thing, it just is, and whether it affects the work for better or for worse is honestly dependent upon how you engage with that fact. I will say trying to back away from it generally leads to problems (unexamined prejudices showing up in stories, worldviews that it turns out most people don't share going stated simply as fact rather than being supported by the writing around it). It can also lead to a stronger story, though, if you're willing to engage with it. Engaging honestly with what scares you and why, what you find comforting, uplifting, upsetting, et cetera. All of these require vulnerability, and allowing other people to see that, and it's going to happen with or without your consent because you're the one writing the thing, so you may as well make peace with it and lean in. "But what if it's cringe" too late baby most things are cringe and that shouldn't be your focus. You are fighting a losing battle. We are all cringe. But we are free.

Hope this helps. I just know I've left half a sentence fragment in here that I said I'd come back to and then forgot oh god

[orbeater]

HAI do you have any headcanons about specifically how vander views the other guards and students vs how they see him?

Ok so i think i wrote down a good amount time to ramble. Gonna talk about my hcs for the general worldbuilding and his upbringing a bit so it gives more context for his interactions with people i suppose. I'll highlight the part of your ask so you can skip to that 👍

Royale high plays a very major part on balancing the harmony between the different elemental groups. It was created as a sign of fraternity amongst the kingdoms and a vow of sort to never cause harm amongst each other, no matter how different they are, because the future generation is dear to them, and they wouldn't want them to suffer because of their actions. RH itself is set in a kind of a central city, a multicultural hub consisting of all sorts of people and creatures from different kingdoms, making it a very reputable institution due to its diversity and education quality available for everyone. Personally i would like to imagine it also goes beyond high school levels, mostly because its more convenient to imagine a place where kings and queens were made to also have college level education.

Now because of its stature, RH is in close connections with all sorts of kingdoms. Naturally, if you're training to become a knight the chances of you getting picked are high if you're from RH. RH also hires those that show valuable skills in the field as their guards. Some people use this as an experience of sort to later go for a Knight's position for their respective kingdoms.

Now moving onto Vander's upbringing:

He was raised by some of the most respected knights of the dark kingdom, which was how he was inspired to attend RH till graduation (I hc him to be of the dark element). He took up a position as a guard at the school to get more like credit for becoming a knight later on.

As a kid, his parents weren't around a lot because of their jobs. He never held it against them though, but he did grow up isolated because of his shy nature. He had a creative side to him too, his main hobby being writing. The time that he did get to spend with his parents, he cherished it a lot. They always taught him how even if the worst times were to fall on them, the people who loved him would always be there for him. What you give would be what you receive, things like that which he still holds as one of his main teachings. He's really just a shy guy who cares about his close group of people a lot, even if they're few. His main motivation to continue as a guard is the fact that he gets be of help to the students and people in general, because all throughout his younger days he was misunderstood and looked upon as some sort of like. A stone hearted person. Which was only because he isn't the best at expressing himself. He might look too serious and tough, but underneath it all he has a good heart.

Hes also kinda bad at social queues and stuff, sometimes saying things that might come across as strange, which gives people the wrong idea about him. I don't want to call him a nihilist, hes more of a uhhh, positive emo? If thats a thing anyways.

Also all the song lyrics he says, bro is just humming 👍. Hes a nerd who likes silent hill and fire emblem and quotes dracula (all canon).

The main part! His interactions with the other guards:

Philip:

Philip being Philip was always kind to Vander ever since he joined the guards. As his senior he would always engage in meaningful conversations with him, giving him advice and such even though Vander's responses would be short, he still saw him for how he was. It left a great impression on him, and he respects Philip a lot. They also engage in conversations about their favourite novels and poetry sometimes.

Zalia

Zalia would be wary of him at first, since shes not the one to trust others quickly. She also gets thrown off by the fact that he just sometimes appears out of nowhere (man has silent footsteps), and remains on edge a bit. I do think she'd slowly be able to trust him as more time passes by, because he does his job properly and doesn't give her a reason to doubt him. He also helps around with tasks like sorting the guard log which takes a long time just by herself, so she comes to appreciate his company even though he doesn't say a lot.

Hans

I feel like. He actually wouldn't mind him that much. All the times he gets assigned to work with him he's actually glad because the guard doesn't actively try to engage in conversations a lot, plus he doesn't annoy him unlike Edward. He just has to tell him to do some work or tell him his next patrolling area and he'd just go do it with no hesitation. The only time Hans was hesitant to tell him about his next guarding spot was when he was suppose to guard the dungeon, because of course he cares about others, and is aware of how unsettling the place is, even for him. Vander would be indifferent, but he would still think highly of his senior.

Edward

He'd be scared of him at first. Edward would be out patrolling the dormitory hallways at night, which already puts him on the edge. Vander being the guy with silent footsteps would see the guard walking alone and would ask him if "he perhaps required his assistance" which would scare the shit out of the other guy. After sometime though I can see them becoming good friends, especially once Edward would find out about his interests and realise that he's actually really chill. He would still not watch horror movies with him though, because he knows that a "not particularly frightening" for Vander would be a "keeps you awake at 4am" for him. Maybe he'd try to compliment him every once in a while but then he'd get flustered when Vander would say something really genuine because he obviously means it

Oliver

Theee nerd4nerd dynamic. I think Oliver would be a little scared of him at first, not because he thinks he looks scary or something, but because he has no idea how to interact with him. Over a course of time though, he'd realise how similar they are. They'd bond over his "Im a light fairy but my bestie is a dark fairy" anime that I have mentioned before. They both would enjoy the eveningfall season. They'd watch slasher films together. They'd talk about their lives with each other, maybe they would play dnd and bring Edward with them. They could sit in silence next to each other for hours and it wouldn't be awkward at all. I could enjoy a romantic dynamic between them two IF it isn't the weird alpha yandere Vander and soft bby Oliver bullshit because holy shit that makes me so unreasonably mad. The best dynamic is when Oliver is stronger than him in general because that is so funny. Man can clock an 8 ft plant monster but will panic over the idea of engaging in a conversation with a stranger. Imagine them bonding over their isolated childhood and how they were treated by people and that that didn't affect the fact they both still see people as something worth protecting. Can you see my vision. But also like I've said they'd never make it past the hand holding stage because together they're shy². Vander would be the closest to him amongst the guards.

Alexander

I feel like Alex would already sort of know that Vander is chill. He's quiet so they could just sleep and he wouldn't really say anything. Sometimes he'd quote something profound and Alex would just be like "Woahh....." and then he'd go back to snork mimiming. They would also look upto him because of how proper he is and because he is older than them. Vander wouldn't really mind his company, they'd both just stand next to each other while he guards and Alex just naps peacefully. Maybe he would buy them some snacks from the vending machine whenever he would run out of money, which Alex really appreciates.

Nathaniel

Honestly they'll have the most coworker type of relationship. It'd be a very one sided sort of conversation but they could still be work friends. Nathaniel would tell him random stories about his dreams, or the trading hub, some duck he saw, etc etc and Vander would just hum along. Nathan would appreciate his company because Vander is a good listener and lets him ramble about different things

Taj

For their first meeting Taj would be.... confused? by Vander's demeanor, but he wouldn't question it. Over time i think they both can become work friends because of their shared interest over reading I guess. Not much else to say really.

In short Vander is just a very normal emo guy who lives by the idea of

[dexpairs-blog]

Platonic Headcanons for your favorite characters in obey me!! How about Gender neutral Teen Mc who's just. An insecure overachiever who thinks grades are worth everything and lives off of praise but u don't have to do this if u don't want to luv <3

*comes out of the void*

I have been summoned

Ngl i can relate to this prompt, let's see what i can do for ya. Also, Sorry that these are short-

These might be ooc i'm sorry!!

Luke, Simeon and Mammon comforting an overachiever teen! MC

Platonic for all

Simeon

Simeon saw the effort you always put in your studies but could'nt help but worry at how sometimes you would come to RAD looking like a mess, evident eye bags from the all nighter you pulled the night before, your uniform worn hastily and full of wrinkles, your bedhead that you didn't bother fixing since you did not have the time to do so and the fact that you were practically passing out on the floor.

Poor angel is worried sick when this happens more often and decides to do something about this.

After classes he invites you to purgatory hall for some tea and gives you no chance to refuse when you say that you have to study.

You ended up staying the night and he made sure you got proper sleep and a good meal.

"Little one... Please listen to me, grades do not define your worth in anyway. Hush, rest for now, when you'll wake up i'll be here with some of the cookies Luke is baking at the moment."

Luke

I'm still learning how to write for him i'm sorry

Baby did not notice at first. (He's 10 please forgive him🗿)

It takes Solomon pointing it out for him to realize what's going on, as soon as he sees you he's stomping towards you with an angry expression.

When he gets you though, instead of yelling he pulls you in a tight hug.

Then he says that you shouldn't hang out with those mean demons and drags you to a baking session, again, you're in no place to refuse.

TOO BAD Y'ALL DIDN'T EVEN GET STARTED BCS YOU PASSED OUT ON THE COUCH OF PURGATORY HALL-

When you wake up the first thing you see is the sweet angel with a tray of freshly baked pastries.

"MC... You know you're my best friend right? I care about you, Simeon does too. Grades don't matter because you're the best human in the three realms okay!?"

Mammon

He knows but mans doesn't know what to do, so he just sticks with watching to see if there's anything he can help you with.

This doesn't last very long cause Mammon just can't sit there and watch.

So one day out of nowhere he barges into your room (as usual) with snacks and his laptop, then he picks you up and (gently) throws you on your bed.

You two pulled an all nighter watching movies and making jokes, ah... There it is the MC we all love.

When you wake up you'll find Mammon still in your room, asleep, holding you tight like a teddy bear and drooling a little bit💀

But the SECOND you try to wiggle out of his death grip he wakes up and starts whining about how he missed hanging out with you and you should stop overworking yourself.

"look squirt, i know this ain't my thing but,, ya seriously need to stop overworkin' yourself. You're gonna drop dead one of these days if ya keep going like this! Who cares if your grades suck we all love you anyway! So please... Will you stop? ...for me?"

[maybenotmei]

kaoru gf hcs pls😭🫶?

with you !

today i'm going to give you the "precious treasure" that you've always wanted!

— ((( o(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)o )))♡ —

notes: Hiiiii anon i'm assuming general dating so i'll do that <3 thank you for letting me ramble abt kaoru . i have like four kaoru 4* on jpn so i think it's only right i write a lot about her. can you tell i really Really love kaoru seta .

also another anon sent kaoru seta hcs and im wondering R U guys the same person. if not then this is out to 2nd anon as well!!!

dramatic. very, very dramatic

dramatic in the "proclaims your love for you from the top of the haneoka building if she could" kind of dramatic

(she shouldn't look down though)

in public... it really depends on if you've made your relationship public or not.

kaoru has a ton of fans. you know this very well, especially if you were once one of her diehard fans. in order not to cause or stir any drama, you both will keep your relationship private for a while.

like. remember how rokka's class reacted to when kaoru called rokka "cinderella" out of nowhere and everyone was already freaking out ("what is this?! explain yourself kaoru-san!!")? yeah think that but for the Whole school if they found out.

dating kaoru is like dating a really really famous person except most if not all her fans are in the same general location at the same time. pda is a little hard for you, but to kaoru? oh she'll treat you like one of her "kittens" as to not draw any attention (but if you squint you can tell she has favoritism towards you.)

cmon, she wants to show how much she loves you in public too, you know?

if you guys DO go public, it's going to be a mess. kaoru will be there for you of course, and both of you make sure that you two will not let the mean words or whatever get to each other at all. you're ready to fight for each other if needed because you love each other

(that prev hc could be tied w the overprotective hcs i've done in the past)

kaoru's the type to give you nicknames,

the ones you're comfortable with, of course. darling, love, a lot more, although just tell her you don't like a nickname and she won't use it on you. promise.

kaoru has a way with her words, so she'd say a ton of flattering praises and compliments towards you. she'd compliment you whenever she has the chance, but you can catch her off-guard by complementing/flirting with her back— and seeing her flushed face is so worth it

she's scrambling to find her words if you return the flirt. "o-oh, that's very flattering, dear.." (trying to keep her cool)

^^ i think this is Exactly how rumors would start (and your relationship will inevitably become public)

but she also loves spending time with you! when it's simple, day to day life, she loves spending it with you. the little things in life start to feel a lot nicer when you're with the one you love, and that's exactly how kaoru feels about you.

that doesn't mean she's not extra extra with your dates sometimes...... although those only happen when she plans it carefully or hhw's willing to help (and fund) it. once, your date was on a literal cruise ship. you two were inside though (and if you're not easily sea sick, you both went outside on the deck)

has she dedicated multiple performances to you? yes. has she tossed guitar picks on stage in your direction in hopes you'd catch it? absolutely. has she given you one personally with her signature during a really special performance on your anniversary where you didn't catch the guitar pick? yes, yes she did.

practices and after concerts are almost the same in a way that she would take up every opportunity to flatter you— except after concerts, you'd congratulate her. whether it'd be roses, chocolates, or maybe just a simple hairpin, she'd treasure it. you might catch her wearing that hairpin the next day, or in a concert for everyone to see.

now, theatrical performances. she loves you but she has to stay in character, right? however that really doesn't stop her from looking over in the audience for you, hoping, just hoping you're there. and when you are, when she sees you, she will perform to her utmost best. (not like she already was... but seeing you makes her motivated)

you mean everything to her, and she'll never ask for anything more.

[vannybarber]

The Prenup: Part Two

Summary: After four years of being together and finally being engaged, Chris wants you to sign a prenup.

Chris Evans x Reader

Warnings: angst, swearing, chris getting his ass handed to him, a lot of pain.

Part One

Walking down the isle, you grab everything that looks remotely pleasing in sight. After you left the house, you were just driving nowhere. Having to refill your tank because you wasted all the gas, the crackhead at the station kept singing Mambo Number 5 and it made you feel slightly better. Now you were in the convenience store spending your feelings away.

You get to the pain pills and grab some Aleve. Your head has been thumping for hours now. You see a pink box and knock a couple of those in the basket too just because they're pink. Whipping over to the candy isle, you grab multiple bags of Starburst jelly beans just to spite Chris because you know he loves them. Moments later, your basket it full and you head to the front.

Tipping the basket, you dump all the contents on the counter. The cashier gives you this look and you don't blame her. You had 3 bags of jellybeans, 5 random candy bars, 2 pink boxes you still can't read out, a blue Mountain Dew, a dog toy and some Doritos. Absolutely random. The cashier scans all the junk food, but when she gets to the pink boxes, she look up at you and at your left hand.

You're in a daze, so you don't see her looking at you. Your mind was all over the place and frankly, you didn't want to think about any of the latest events. Not the prenup. Not the engagement. Not Chris. Snapping into reality, you pay for your groceries and take all the bags and walk out the store.

On the drive to the hotel, you pass the park where you and Chris met. That didn't help with your predicament at all.

Dodger had gotten off his leash because he was so excited to finally have a home. You were with your niece. She is so obsessed with dogs and wanted to meet every one. Dodger spotted her and pounced on her, giving infinite kisses.

Chris was freaking out. His dog just pounced on a two year old child.

You, on the other hand, were laughing your ass off. Your niece wasn't complaining either because she kissed him back.

He apologized profusely and you guaranteed him it was okay. You guys hung out for the rest of the day and decided to go on another date, without the kids. One date lead to many others and soon enough you'd met his whole family, vice versa, and started living with him. It was unreal.

And here you are infront of a hotel, with no ring or engagement and your fianceé almost an hour away. Oh, how the tables have turned.

You get out and receive your room key. You head up to your room and set everything down. You were so tired and worn out. Getting comfortable in the bed, you knock out almost immediately.

Meanwhile, back at your house, it's pure chaos.

"Chris do you realize what the fuck you just did?"

Scott is practically screaming at his brother, pacing around the room.

"Scott can you fucking chill? You're not helping the situation" Chris snapped back at him. Scott stops and stares at him like he's an idiot.

"We wouldn't be in this situation if it wasn't for your stupid choices. Tell him Ma!" He looks at her to back him up. Lisa stands up from her seat and walks over to Chris.

"Now Scott, Chris is a grown man. He can handle this situation, right honey?" Her hands are on both his shoulders, looking for him to respond.

"There you go. You always do this! You always baby him up whenever he's in trouble." He rolls his eyes. Lisa draws back from Chris.

"No, I do not. I let all of you sort out your own issues, with my advice of course. Shanna, Carly, do I baby your brother?" Chris throws his head back in annoyance.

"Um, yeah kinda.."

"Sometimes...Ma, but not all the time of course"

They say at the same time. They hated to admit it but when it came to Chris, she mostly got him out his problems. He's not used to solving them on his own. Lisa utters incoherent words in disbelief.

"That's not important right now. My fianceé just called off our engagement and I don't know where she is!" Chris interrupts, getting everyone back into focus.

"Technically she's not your fianceé if she called the engagement off, but it's whatever..." Scott mumbles with his hands up. Chris shoots him a 'fuck off look'.

"Well have you tried calling her?" Carly asks him.

"Yes, but she's not picking up. She can hold quite the grudge when it comes to her feelings." And he was right. You were very protective of your feelings and anything to harm that will be shut down ASAP.

"Well we just have to hope that she is trusting her better judgment and will come back, unlike someone in the room" Scott says sarcastically turning and sitting on the couch. Chris smacks his lips.

"Scott that's enough!" Lisa snaps.

"Well he deserves everything he's getting! He put himself in this situation. Now he doesn't have a wife and he's miserable. Could never be me."

Chris had enough. He moved quickly put his chair and into the bedroom, slamming the door shut. He sat at the edge of the bed and cried.

You had finally woken up and check your phone.

26 missed calls | 63 messages.

You text Lisa and tell her you're fine. Closing the app, you look at your homescreen. It's a picture of Chris laying on your chest asleep. His lips are parted and you're grinning in the screen. He looks like an adorable puppy. You grab your charger out your bag and plug it up.

Remembering the stuff you bought, you grab the jellybeans and open them. Seeing the assortment of colors, you go straight for the red ones. Chris' favorite. You were gonna milk this to the bone. You reach in the bag and feel one of the pink boxes you bought. Still not knowing what it was, you pull it out and read it.

First Response Pregnancy

You bought a damn pregnancy test. 2 to be exact. You didn't know if you wanted to laugh or to smack yourself for wasting your money. Many thoughts went through your mind. Should you take the tests? Should you throw it away? What if you were pregnant? That last thought gave you shivers. Pregnant at a time like this? Were you even ready?

Looking down at the test, you decide to take it. Just for the hell of it. You knew you weren't gonna be pregnant because you take birth control. Not to mention you and Chris use condoms for extra measure. Nothing wrong with being safe.

You get up, pad to the bathroom and get down to business. You do all the steps and clean up after yourself. Now you just had to wait.

You were nervous as hell. You don't know why though. There isn't a chance you could be pregnant because you didn't allow there be one. You have been beyond careful. There would be zero possibility. Or so you thought.

After what felt like 5 minutes, your shakey hand grab the test and flip it over.

| |

You freeze and your eyes dart to the information section.

Not Pregnant- |

Pregnant- | |

You look back at the results. There were two lines. Absentmindedly, you shake your head and back up until your back hits the wall. You can't be pregnant. There's literally no freaking way. It's got to be false.

You grab the other test and take it. After 5 more minutes, you check it and there's two lines also. Now you were freaking the fuck out. Both tests are positive. You rush back in the room and dig through the bag for the other box. You grab it and take both tests at the same time. Don't ask.

After another 5 minutes, you stare at the back of the two tests. Moment of truth. You flip both the tests at the same time.

| | on each test.

This is where you fall on the floor in shock and fear. You were pregnant. With Chris' child. And you guys just had a huge fall out and you're all alone. You're not ready for a kid. Especially not now.

You bury your head in your hands and let the tears fall. How in the hell were you gonna tell him?

taglist:

@flattykawa1 @mayafatimakhan @attitude-times @shawn-youth @traceyaudette @fantasticinternetpizza @kyraroseficreblogs33 @radi0active-thoughts @youthought-iwasa-nicegirl @ohbarracuda @katelyneannxo @jennamarieee623 @nicochantez @craycraycraic @ilikeurdad @ppal3 @captainson-of-coul @joanne-stan @ilovetheeagles @cristinagronk16 @kelbabyblue @onyourgoddamnleft @jessyballet @misz-adrii @geminievans1 @saltyflowermakertaco @a-moment-captured @harrysthiccthighss @greatbatprofessordragon

i hope this part kept you guys' intrest like the first part😭 i felt the pressure today lmao

if you're bolded, i couldn't tag you. i'll personally message you ❤ thank you guys for your support. it means so much to me 🤧

[kpop---scenarios]

Girl Of Your Dreams

Pairing: Ten x Succubus! Ayn

Genre: Yandere! AU, Succubus! AU, College! AU

Warning: SOME YANDERE TYPE CONTENT. Smut, swearing

Word Count: 3.2k

A/N: i hope you enjoy! Big thanks again to @tacojisung for the plot

Ten leans over the railing as he looks out into the crowd of college kids dancing the night away. The smell of sweat and vodka fills the house as the music pumps, the bass shaking the windows. He wasn't even the biggest fan of college parties but there was something about this specific party that he just felt like he needed to come to it. There was a reason he was supposed to be there, but here he was, 3 hours in and no sign of what that reason was. 

He sighs as he heads towards the staircase, finally deciding he was going to call it a night. He was over it, and not overly in the mood to party, thankfully this party was not one his frat hosted.  He looks out into the crowd as he goes down the railing and that's when he sees her on the dance floor. The girl he's been dreaming about, the girl who's been making him have to change his sheets so often in the week from all the cum stains. Excitedly he turns around, yelling to his friend, Johnny who was behind him. 

"It's her!" He yells, pointing out to the crowd. 

"Who?" Johnny asks. 

"The girl from my dreams! I fucking knew she was real." He laughs, pointing at you again, still looking at Johnny. He turns his head looking back into the crowd to where you were. Your eyes lock with his and a smirk spreads across your lips. You wink at him before you began to maneuver through the crowd. Ten quickly rushes down the stairs, trying to chase you outside but the second he gets outside you're nowhere to be found. He grabs his head in frustration, looking for you one more time before going back inside. 

He knew it. He knew the girl of his dreams was real. 

He had been dreaming about you for so long, he was honestly beginning to believe that the two of you were together, you must want him considering you come to him every night. You seem to love his hands, his tongue and his cock in the dreams, so why wouldn't you in real life? You were the one for him and he was going to make sure you knew it. 

**

The next day, Ten was sitting in his psychology class, his mind on you as it always was. He pictured your body, your face, your lips, your smile, the way you touched him. He barely heard what his professor had said until the subject of dreams came up. 

"When you see someone in your dream that you don't recognize, it's because you've seen that person at some point in your life. It may not have been a very significant point but it was enough for your subconscious to remember them. We'll pick up more on this and more next week, class dismissed." 

After his class, Ten was walking through campus, lugging his backpack and headed back to the frat house for a much-needed nap, and a possible visit from his mystery dream girl. He began to think about his professor's words about dreams and dreaming about a stranger. It made him wonder where he first saw you? What was he doing? Why couldn't he remember? It frustrated him that he didn't have an answer to any of these questions. He just wanted to know you and be with you, why was that so much to ask for?  

Ten walks into the house and spots Mark sitting on the couch, focused on his game as he closes the door behind him.

"Hey man, you wanna game?" Mark asks, sitting on the couch while playing Xbox. 

Ten waved him off as he climbed the stairs, making his way to his bedroom. He slings his backpack on the floor, kicking off his shoes and hopping straight into his bed. He stretches out, getting into his comfiest position with his eyes closed, letting himself slowly drift off to sleep. 

"My baby." You sing as you crawl into Ten's bed. You hover yourself over him, sitting down on his crotch, waiting for him to wake up. Slowly you rock back or forth, grinding yourself on his cock which now is beginning to get harder. 

"Mmh." He groans, bucking his hips. With his eyes still closed his hands find their way to your hips, gripping tightly as he helps you rock back and forth. "You came back." He whispers. 

"Of course I did." You purr, leaning forward to place a small kiss on his lips before sitting up again. 

"Please." He groans, feeling the heat radiating from your pussy, he needed more. 

You smirk as you move off of him, helping him slide his pants down, letting his cock spring free. You position yourself over him, sliding down onto his cock, making him moan. 

"You need to be a good boy." You whine as you pick up your pace, riding him. "Don't look for me." 

Ten closes his eyes, his hands back on your hips as he tries to control his orgasm. "Got it?" You groan, bouncing on his cock. 

"Y-yes.. got it.." he stutters as he cums inside you, grunting as he fills you up. 

In an instant, you're gone and he wakes up to a load of cum dripping down onto his sheets, again, forgetting what he had agreed to. 

** 

That night he was dragged out to a club that was known for the dancers who made appearances. You could almost always guarantee there would be at least one insane show of dancing, and Ten loved to go and watch, sometimes participate but tonight...  Tonight he had a feeling that he needed to watch the dance floor and watch who was going to be on it. He felt drawn to it, and he already knew it was you who was doing it. Clearly, you were going to be there and you wanted him there. You must be playing hard to get. 

"Wow," Mark exclaims, walking along on the balcony, looking down to the dance floor. "There's a lot of awesome dancers down there." He laughs, stopping with Taeyong to look at one couple in particular. Ten stops as well, his eyes narrowing in on the couple. He can see the male fairly clearly, Oh Sehun from the EXO frat, a well-known rival of NCT but he couldn't see the front of the girl, only how her hips swayed along with hair, she moved so effortlessly, he felt as though he was almost entranced by her. He watched as they moved along the floor, his feet immediately following and making their way to the stairs. His eyes never leaving them, he can feel the heart begin to race as he steps onto the floor, moving through the crowd of people, his anger level rising as Sehun finally spins her around, and it's you. He knew he was drawn to you for a reason, you're supposed to be his but here you are with another man. 

Ten continues to make his way towards you, now with just a little more urgency as he prepares to get Sehun's dirty hands off your body. 

"Hey." Ten yells, moving through the bodies, getting closer to you. He can see the smile fade from your face as you notice him coming closer. Sehun looks up as Ten stands in front of the two of you, breathing heavily. "What are you doing with him?" He asks, confused on why you're with someone else when you so clearly were meant for him. 

"Just back off," Sehun says, pulling you away from Ten. He walks away, taking a breath and thinking of a game plan, how can he get you alone? 

He wanders through the crowd, his head spinning as he searches for you again, he just wants to see you up close, talk to you and try to clear some things up, he just needed you to give him a chance. He pushes his way through the crowd, getting to a clearing near the bar and that's when he sees you and Sehun. You let go of Sehun's hand, mouthing you'll be right back as you head towards the bathrooms. A smile spreads across his lips as he makes his way to the bathrooms. It's perfect, you're alone and you can hear him out. That's all he needed. As he makes his way over there he watches Sehun turn away, talking to a group and not paying attention any longer, this honestly couldn't get more perfect. He waits for a few feet down from the girl's bathroom, the hall light flickering as his foot tips, god you're taking a long time. 

Finally, the door opens and out you walk, your head is down so you don't notice Ten leaning against the wall until he steps out in front of you. You look up, looking him in the eyes, making him smile. You try to walk past but his hands grip your shoulders, gently pushing you against the wall. 

"I'll scream." You threaten, making Ten scoffs. 

"I'll cover your mouth." He growls. "I just wanna talk to you." He pleads. "Why are you pretending not to know me?" He asks, frustrated.

"You need to stop this. Remember what I told you.." you smirk. 

"Ayn!" You both hear. Turning your head you see an angry Sehun marching your way. 

"I'll see you." You whisper before ducking away from him and running towards the hot-headed Sehun to calm him down. Ten stands there watching as you caress his face in hopes of calming him down. 

"Let's just go." You urge Sehun, pulling the puffed out and protective man away. Ten stands there, he's shocked that you dismissed him so easily. He watched as you dragged Sehun from the club, a man who was looking back at Ten, clearly threatened by the fact he was going to lose you. 

Ten walks back towards the stairs, running into an overly happy looking Mark before he hits the staircase. 

"There you are!" Mark exclaims, grabbing Ten. "Look we got a VIP booth with some fine hunnies." Mark laughs. Ten looks to the exit doors and sees you leaving and he just can't help the urge but to follow you, despite your oaf of a boyfriend. 

"I gotta go.. sorry." Ten says, glancing at Mark before taking off to the doors. Luckily you and Sehun aren't too far ahead that he lost you. As he walks behind you both, he puts his hood up, not wanting to be noticed by anyone but especially not you. 

He follows you for a few blocks until you enter an apartment building that unfortunately needed a code but he would find it out in time. At Least now he knew where you lived, so he headed back to the frat to grab his car and have a little stake out of his own.

A few hours later, his eyes get heavy in the front seat of his jeep. He crosses his arms and leans his head back to rest, just for a moment but instead falls asleep.

 It didn't take long for you to enter his dream, unzipping his pants, pulling out his cock and straddling his lap in the front seat of his car. He was hard and inside you, the warmth of your pussy surrounding his cock. 

“It feels so good.” He groans, placing his hands on your hips. You lift yourself slowly before slamming back down on him, making him cry out in pleasure.  

“You like my pussy, don’t you baby?” You ask. 

“Yes, fuck yes.” He moans, his toes curling as you squeeze yourself on him again "Fuck you always make me feel so good." He groans, his arms surrounding you, pulling you in close, his eyes still closed. 

"It's because you're special to me." You whisper in his ear, lifting yourself before slowly pushing yourself back on his cock. 

"Oh my god." He groans. "I love you. I love you so much." He groans, bucking his hips. All he wanted was to be as deep inside you as he could be. Fuck you felt amazing. 

"You need to stop following me." You warn, riding him, your fingers running through his hair. "Leave me alone before I move on to someone else." You whisper, holding him close as your clit is rubbed perfectly. "I will." You pause, your orgasm flowing through your body. "Move on and leave you." You cry out, your fingers pulling his hair as you ride through your high. 

"You can't". He grunts, and again, as he cums. You continue rocking yourself on him, milking him for everything he has, not wanting to waste one last drop. "Fuck." He groans. "Please don't leave me." He finishes. 

"By the way, this isn't my house." You whisper and before he can reply, you're already gone. 

Ten is woken up by a knock at his window, his eyes barely opening until he notices a police officer standing there, looking concerned. 

"Hello, officer." Ten greets him, rolling down his window. 

"You've been parked here for an awfully long time, we've gotten some complaints of a creep in your car description. You okay?" He asks. 

"I'm fine, just got a little tired." Ten laughs. 

"Get home and get yourself cleaned up." The officer says, looking at his pants before back at him and walking away. Ten looks down and notices the stain from his dream, spread across his pants. 

He quickly starts his car, driving away from the apartment that is not yours but must belong to Sehun. 

** 

Over the next week, Ten surely had thought he was going crazy. He saw you everywhere. In the coffee shop walking to the bathroom, on the crowded sidewalk as he strolled down the street, across campus, walking in front of him but he only ever saw the back of you. You were taunting him, you must be. You hadn't visited his dreams in a week, you were appearing everywhere he went, this was you teasing him and playing hard to get but he was going to get you and make sure you could never leave him again. He knew you were ignoring him since he hadn't listened to your warnings, and frankly, he was tired of it.  

** 

The next day he headed to his psychology class, and this one he was excited about it. They were learning about Lucid Dreaming when you know you're dreaming and you can control your dream. This was a very important part of his plan of how he was going to get you and he needed to get you, his one true love. 

"Lucid Dreams." Ten's professor announces. "The dreams where you know you're dreaming and you're able to in some ways, control those dreams and what happens in them." 

Ten's interest peaks as he listens to his professor speak. This is it, this is how his plan starts, now he just needs a way to trap you, from his dream and into his world. 

"Along with lucid dreams, there's sleep paralysis, which is said to bring a fear of yours to live in your dreams. Your fear paralyzes you, making you face it head-on." He pauses. "Wet dreams." He stops for a second as the class laughs. "Yes, yes hilarious. Wet dreams are said to be ruled by the evil, seductive temptress, the succubus. Does anyone know what a succubus is?" He asks. 

No one chimes in. Ten is sure he knows but chooses to keep quiet, waiting for his professor to explain. 

"A succubus comes into your dreams and pleases you, you are her main source of energy, and for women, it's the incubus that comes into their dreams. Now.." he pauses, seeing a hand raised. "Yes?" 

"Would there be a way to trap a succubus?" Someone asks, piquing Ten's interest even more. 

"Ah, yes. There are stories of men trying to trap the succubus and rumours of their success. They draw an arcane circle under their bed and hide it, but also lucid dreams come into play here too. You need to be able to hold on and wake yourself up." The professor says. "Anyways, it's supposedly a myth. Now we are moving on to the incubus.." 

Ten packs up his belongings, leaving class early, he has too much to do and it cannot wait. 

** 

Arriving home, he storms through the door, ignoring the men sitting in the living room and heading straight up to his room. After he left campus he had stopped at a special store and gathered the rare ingredients he needed for his plan. 

Ten moves his bed to the side of his room, clearing out all the shit from under it before he begins unpacking his backpack. He opens the special salt and starts making the circle, looking at the picture he has for reference. 

Thirty minutes later Ten is carefully moving his bed back over the circle, his stomach doing flips of excitement. It was finally here, the day he was going to get you to be with him. He knew you would never come with him willingly so this was how it was going to need to be.

He crawls on his bed, remembering his password to wake himself up out of his lucid dream. He hoped this worked, he needed this to work, he needed you to be with him. Closing his eyes he relaxes his body allowing himself to almost fully fall asleep. 

He opens his eyes, sitting up in his bed. It's quiet, almost too quiet. Dreams.. he's dreaming. 

"Please." He calls out, hoping you were listening. 

"What?" You ask, walking through the door. 

"Come to me. Please." He says, holding out his hand.  You let out a sigh as you walk towards him, sliding your hand in his. 

Ten pulls you onto the bed, laying back down as you straddle him. 

"I've missed you." He whispers, bucking his hips. "Fuck I've missed you." He groans, pulling you down, reaching his lips for yours. 

You don't say anything, instead kiss him back. Your hands run through his hair as his arms wrap around your waist. 

Your lips still attached, he sits up, effortlessly flipping you both over to you laying on your back. "I wanna try something." He whispers, grabbing a pair of handcuffs. He takes your left wrist and handcuffs you to his headboard. 

"Baby." You laugh nervously. "What's happening?" 

"What's happening is you've ignored me for a week! A week! And teased me like I'm just some replaceable nothing to you. But I'm not. I'm the one you're meant to be with, don't you see!?" He yells. 

You try to free yourself from the handcuff but you can't. 

"Ten.. please. Just let me go." You beg. 

"Now I'm going to take you with me, and we can be together forever." He smiles, his eyes are wide and terrifying. 

"No... you can't... Ten." You cry. 

"Forever." He yells. 

Ten wakes up on his floor, breathing heavily. He looks around his room, he's back. He looks to his bed and smiles. There you are, crying and handcuffed to his bed. He crawls up to you, taking you in his arms. 

"Welcome home." 

[ambivalent-anarchy]

Peter Parker - SFW Alphabet

Masterlist

This is for MCU Peter (cuz some of the answers would be different if they were for others lol)

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Peter loves affection, but he's got to work through all his nerves first. Just the idea of touching you sometimes is enough to make him start blushing and hiding into himself. But once he finally works through it, affection is always. He likes to receive it, but he LOVES to give it. He basically has all the love languages, but his major two are words of affirmation and physical touch.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Peter Parker is a good best friend...when he's there. He pays attention to all the little things and he always does right when it really counts. He'll geek out with you, help you no matter what, and try his best to make you happy no matter what. However if you don't know about him being Spiderman, it can be a real stress on the friendship, because he'll always seem distant. Once you know, it will be like everything falls into place. You finally understand why he does the things he does. Overall though, he's a stellar friend.

You'd probably become his friend because you sat next to each other in class, or you were already at the Avengers compound, and for whatever reason, the two of you immediately clicked.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

PETER LOVES CUDDLES. And when Peter wants to cuddle, he wants to CUDDLE. He wants to squeeze you and never ever let go. Ngl he'll probably fall asleep while cuddling you because when he's cuddling he's in PEAK zen mode. It's probably the most relaxed that he can be.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

Yeah he definitely wants to settle down, but he's scared to. It's not that he has commitment issues, it's just that he's so afraid and aware of the dangers of being with him. But if given the chance, he'd probably settle.

He's not completely terrible at cooking, May has definitely taught him a few things. But he's no chef. Let's be real he's probably had a bunch of moments of forgetting that something was in the oven. There will be lots of disasters. When it comes to cleaning, if pressed, he will clean. But don't be surprised when every room in the house is messed up again because of things that he'll "come back for later" that he never comes back for.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Oh he'd hate every bit of it, he'd dread over it for days and days. If Peter were to break it off, he'd do it face to face. He'd feel so bad about it, and if you start to cry he actually might comfort you in the midst of breaking up with you.

Best outcome, it was mutual and you guys end like friends. Worst outcome, he gets cold feet and actually just leaves you a note.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

He's surprisingly cool about commitment, given the dangers of his life. Of course, he's hesitant, but when this dude falls, he falls HARD. So hard to where he'll commit and not think twice about it.

He'd wanna get married whenever it hits him I guess. Not right away, but it's not like he'd have you waiting forever.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Physically- As gentle as the average teenage boy I suppose lol. Well a little bonus because of how anxious he is of hurting you. 5/10

Emotionally- Peter's more anxious boi than soft crybaby. He wouldn't need comfort on everything 24/7, because he can actually handle way more than people give him credit for, but it's when he's going through something really personal or really traumatic when he needs that reassurance that everything will be alright. 6/10

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Peter doesn't mind hugs, but he's gotta be in the mood for one to really enjoy it, otherwise he's just going through the motions with it. Like if he's in the mood his brain is "oh my gosh you're hugging me this is beautiful you've graced me with your touch you wonderful specimen" but if he's not it's just like "oh... this is unexpected." I don't think he's super into hugs because I kind of like the headcanon that he's a bit of a germaphobe but I don't think he's super against them either. He's more in the middle where if it hits him, it hits him and if it doesn't, he doesn't want them.

He gets in the mood to hug like 20 times a day. You'll be beside him doing work and like out of nowhere. BOOM. Hugged. And then he just goes back to doing whatever he's doing except now he's blushing really hard while doing it.

Peter's hugs are really soft and quick (unless he's cuddling you, then it's really long). He just wants to feel your presence until he's satisfied. He's always really warm so that's a major plus.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

Not right away. It'll be whenever it feels right. And I picture the first l-word drop going one of three ways:

1) Quirky - you guys will be chilling/making out/watching a movie and he'll find himself feeling really sentimental and emotional for no reason and he'll just turn and be like, "hey, I love you". And it sort of catches you off-guard and he sees your expression (whatever it may be) and he immediately starts blushing and stammering and he's like "I-i mean- no I don't!..I-i mean I do!... but like- not unless you want me too! I-in fact I'll hate you if you want me-" and you have to cut him off with a kiss before he gets too wound up and you softly smile back like "I love you too, weirdo."

2) Sweet - he's thought about this for a long time (and even maybe told May and Ned about it) and he really wants to tell you but he doesn't know how and you notice that's he's been weird around you and always looks like he has something else on his mind (like more than usual) and you're getting pretty worried and after awhile you can't take it anymore and you confront him about it probably at the lunch table or in the hallways after school or at his apartment (is there some mission you don't know about? Is he breaking up with you? Is he okay?) and he's stuttering alot and he finally has to pause and compose himself before pulling you aside and softly telling you how we feels.

3) Angsty - after a particularly intense night at patrol (definitely with a casualty) he's perched on the top of a building, staring out at New York, feeling like the biggest failure alive. He's run down with guilt and the tears just won't stop. Hands shaking, he dials your number and you pick up and immediately start asking if he's okay once you hear his trembling voice. "I messed up," he mumbles before he breaks down and sobs out the entire story to you. You try your best to comfort him as best you can through the phone, trying to tell him (with no avail) that it's not his fault and that he can't save everyone. It takes a while, but he finally calms down enough to clearly take a swing, but not before he says, "look..I want you to know that I love you... and I'll do everything I can to always protect you...I promise you that...I can't lose you," he sobs. Given the situation, neither one of you really registers that this is his first time saying it, but it makes it a dozen times easier to start saying it more often from now on.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Peter's jealousy is probably the average amount for a guy. He doesn't do much with it though. He'll just get really quiet and maybe freak out to Ned about it later. Very subtle looks and jaw clenches but other than that, he's fine. Unless you're really attentive, you probably wouldn't notice.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

When he first started getting into the hang of first dates and stuff, his kisses were pretty fast and more like little pecks on the lips and stuff because he was always so nervous about messing up. But now that's he's gotten the hang of it, Peter's kisses (when he's not in a rush) are usually slow and sensual. He wants to do nothing but focus on you in that moment.

Well mostly on the lips of course. He'll lay his head on your shoulder alot when he's bored so every now and then when he's doing that he'll turn his head and give you a little kiss on your shoulder. If he's whispering in your ear in lunch he'll give a kiss on the cheek. Really though, once he gets the all his jitters out about it, he'll kiss you anywhere.

Peter probably likes to be kissed on the cheek and on the lips more than anywhere else

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

Peter is amazing with kids. He'll always find a way to get along with them, and they usually warm up to his easy-going nature. He's a bit of a pushover when it comes to really nice kids so they usually love him because he'll give them anything. I'm not really one of talking about having kids, but he'd be a great father in the future. (But we're not in any rush for him to do that okay😂🤭)

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Mornings are spent, well first of all waking up (obviously), cuddling, finishing whatever movie you were watching the night before, Peter probably rambling a bunch about whatever he finds himself wondering about, playing video games, and basically just relaxing before May tells you it's time for school.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

Nights are spent goofing around with Peter and Ned at Peter's home or chilling with Peter which can literally be doing just about anything (making out, relaxing, deep talks, watching movies, doing homework, etc.). You can do practically anything with this guy.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Peter isn't the best about opening up, not because he wants to hide things, but because he isn't on the same wavelength as everyone else when it comes to "important" things to share. Like out of nowhere he'll find himself telling you something and you'll be like "woah I wish I you would've told me that earlier" and he'll just shrug and be like "oh I didn't know that was really important enough to tell". He doesn't tell anything slower or faster it's more like whenever it's on his mind or convenient for him to tell.

But for the most part, if you're important enough for you to know he's spiderman secret, he'll tell you pretty much anything.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

Not easily angered at all. If anything he's more easily confused then angered. Like if you were trying to make him angry, he'd be more "why are you doing this🥺🤨?!" than "why are you doing this😡?!"

He'd only get angry easily if he'd been going through alot and a bunch of things have been building up, other than that, normally he's a pretty chill guy when it comes to losing his temper.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

Oh he remembers practically everything you tell him. Even crap that you've probably forgotten about yourself, he knows. He notices every tiny thing, though he forgets the big stuff sometimes.

Ex: one day May asks him what he wants her to buy at the supermarket for breakfast and he says poptarts because he remembers that you like poptarts from that one time you briefly mentioned how much you liked them and he gets the kind that you like even though he doesn't really like it so that on the days you come over to his house you'll have something to eat...but like legit that same day he forgets that it's your anniversary😬

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

He has many favorite moments, one of them being your first date. He was so nervous, and he showed up late, and he'd regretted letting May choose his outfit, and he hated himself for not choosing the restaurant because it'd show that he wasn't assertive enough, and he was pretty sure he stepped in dog crap while he was running to the restaurant and he just knew that he was the worst date ever until finally he got there and you were totally just fine about it. You told him to relax and that everything was fine and you were just glad to have him there, which in turn made him relax. He looked into your eyes and knew there was absolutely nothing to worry about and he had an amazing time.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

He's protective, but not suffocating. Like if he sees something happening to you from afar, he's not gonna step in unless you make it clear that you want him to. For the most part, he'll let you handle things yourself.

Peter's more like a "protect you from the unknown" kind of guy. He's gonna protect you from threats that you don't know are there, and that are probably much bigger than the two of you. Things like death or heartbreak. He'll probably break up with you to "protect" you, which, let's be honest, is complete stupid, albeit noble. Overall, he'll do anything in his power to keep you happy.

Peter doesn't really need protection more so... comfort. He knows the world he lives in. He can defend himself and all that, but at the end of the day, he just wants someone to tell him that everything's gonna be okay🥺

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

With Peter it's either extremely last minute but a little thoughtful (because he probably forgot) or extremely thought through with unbelievable effort. No in between. Truly a go big or go home type deal. Like for your birthday he's either getting you something he's researched on for months that he knew you'd love or you're getting a card that he bought from a Walmart on the way to school with a sloppily written love letter inside that he came up with off the top of his head. At the end of the day it's the thought that counts when it comes to Peter.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

He thinks literally everything is his fault🙄. If something bad happens, and he feels that he could've done even the slightest thing to change it, he's gonna beat himself up about it no matter what what you try to say.

Also he's a really busy guy. So if you're one of those girls that needs to be kept or need your boyfriend there all hours of the day, Peter's probably not for you.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

Not too concerned. Like of course he wants to look good or cool or whatever, but he's also learned to be pretty comfortable with himself (at least as far as looks go). He gets pretty insecure sometimes but for the most part he's okay with his looks. He'll totally do himself up if he's trying to impress someone though.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Depends on how close you've become. If he only liked you, he'll be okay. If he loved you, yeah, he'll feel incomplete without you. But only if you break up or if you're hurt or lost or something. If the two of you just haven't seen each other for a while he'll be fine. He's not that sentimental.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

Peter has a skirt kink. Skirts. They make him weak. He found this out about himself when he started dating Gwen Stacy. He will practically break his neck to see you in a skirt.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

Someone who has extremely poor hygiene. Peter's not the best at hygiene. He's definitely skipped brushing his teeth from time to time, but someone who's a complete slob? It'll just make him feel bad for you. It's a turn off for him. You won't get his affection but you will get his pity.

Someone obnoxious or aggressive. Peter, although anxious, is overall a pretty chill guy. If someone was just on 100 every time he saw them, ngl they'd probably weird him out. Like of course he wants someone with their own personality, but he wants someone with a level of coolness and obnoxious and aggressive people just aren't cool.

Z = Zzz (What are some sleep habits of theirs?)

Peter wants to hold something when he sleeps. When he was little, he used to sleep with a stuffed animal, and once he got older he broke out of it. But when he slept with you for the first time (sexually/nonsexually, doesn't matter) all that came rushing back. He'll hold you tightly in his sleep and won't let go unless you make him.

Hope you liked it!!😁😁😁

Tagging mutuals: @allegra-writes, @angelsparkers, @hey-its-grey, @spideyyeet, @sunkissedspidey, @underoosjae, @chaoticpete, @spidey-reids-2003, @thesherlockianavenger, @bubblebucky

[idjitlili]

Shrimp Dick Azog.

Kili x reader, requested by anon.

Summary:  Kili convinces you to to join him on hiding from his royal duties as a prince.

Word count: 2899

Warnings: Language , sorry watched Moulin rouge.

So, you hadn't actually grown up with Kili and Fili, more like bloody thrown from the sky a year ago, into their world. Not their world, middle earth. Was not the best thing you wanted, you had just been walking down the stairs with a lightsaber,why a lightsaber? You knew the answer, whether it was yours or someone else's, you knew.

Oh, the dwarves did not like that at all. Surrounding you in a circle a circle , most under average height men, one tall old man and a cute curly haired toddler. Activating the lightsaber, glowing blue, humming as you held it, several confused faces around you.

"Witch!" The men definitely did not know of the modern world, you thought you had landed right into 17th century.

"I do not know what your game is, kidnapping me , but I will use this, stay back!" Feeling like Wendy from the shining, swinging the lightsaber.

Swoosh.

Woosh

Pssshhew

vvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvVVVVVVVVVVVv

vvvvvvvvvvVVVVVVvvvvvvvvvvvvvvvWWWVV.

Yeah wasn't long after that you were a part of the company, you had a higher purpose according to Gandalf, so be it. Okay, it would've been horrifying if you had accidentally hit one of the dwarves when you first met them, not long would they have killed you. Why? Because some how it had became real getting into this world.

Basically you were a padawan and a Jedi master at the same time, highly dangerous with no experience. Was this necessary for the Gods to do this? No it was not, however , Lili just misses Obi-wan, okay?

Being very young, not a minor, but young in the eyes of the dwarves being between the ages 60 and 300. You had been befriended by Fili and Kili quickly;even if you were shy and made friends difficultly. They welcomed you and made you feel comfortable, oh don't get me started on little Ori. He knitted you a blanket within an hour of your arrival, he wasn't just the youngest , he was the sweetest.

Kili right off the back he was a teasing, you weren't sure if he just wanted to get a hold of the lightsaber.  Of course you couldn't just be Fili or Kili's friend you had to be both, they were not just brothers, they were best friends.

You did end up being best friends with both, Kili on a slightly higher level.

At the battle of the five armies, no one stood a chance, the orcs struggled to defend themselves from the lightsaber. Though, you should've let Thorin killed Azog he would not have made it. So, you had simply cut Azogs shrimp dick off and then sliced him in half.

Thus, the battle was won, saving the line of Durin was your greater purpose.

Though, once Azog was defeated Fili and Kili had run into the ice ,unharmed mostly , towards you and their uncle. Kili had slipped pretty fast, smacking his face right into the solid ice, you were surprised he didn't break his nose. Fili went to stop but his younger brother was already back on his feet grinning larger than ever running again.

Your lightsaber still on, humming in the background, stuck out to the side. Thorin heavily breathed, his arms crossed like he was not exhausted , thankful his nephews were safe.

"Oh, OH, who did that?" Kili and Fili smiling up to their uncle and you briefly before Kili had noticed the tiny dick on the floor. Maybe Kili had trouble distinguishing what the small thing was, Fili and Thorin joining in to look. Thorin's face snapping back to yours with disgust ,sighing.

"Y/n, you cut Azogs cock off?" Jabbing Kili in his ribs, at his language , Fili had let out a snort of laughter, patting you on the back.

"I'm sorry, who killed him? Me? So,"

Kili hadn't hesitated picking up the small dick, with two fingers, holding it up to you, too close, stepping back, he had stepped forward.

"Stay back, stay back, I'll kill you with the lightsaber or I will run away with Legolas I always wanted to taste a princess's puss- STAY BACK."

The rest of the company not long after had made it to the four of you, and the shrivelled dick was taken and put on to a cocktail stick . Placed in a glass box on display to present their power towards the Orcs. You were not sure really why they thought that would be a good idea.

Imagine bomber comes in and mistakes it for cocktail sausage.

Erebor was reclaimed, you Bilbo welcome to stay for your contribution to the quest, not just because you saved their stupid arses. Anyone could have seen that was a trapped. Bilbo had went home not long after, promising he would come back, he just really wanted to check on his hole. You having nowhere else to go you stayed.

Though it was a good idea to start, as Erebor filled up the less time you spent with the brothers. The royal duties pulled them away constantly. It was not like you exactly fitted in, you were human, you didn't have a beard to your hips, you were a 'warrior' now but that was because you a had a fucking lightsaber.

Most days you'd be in your chambers with a book, good from the kitchen, or taking your little money from the quest to the now rebuilt markets of dale. It was hard to make friends, so, you were alone. Sometimes you'd visit Bofur in his toy shop or Ori in the library.Frankly , you went to Ori often, he gave the best book suggestions.

You rarely saw Fili or Kili anymore unless they were rushing by you in the halls in a hurry , not even glancing at you.

A whole month of being alone had went by, on that night you began to pack. You figured to go visit Bilbo before heading Gondor, it had been without an heir for years, with Ecthelion II as the steward. Minas Tirith was the city of man, you had no where else to go. Unless you lived in Mirkwood as a witch.

With your bag packed, you left your chambers, during the night, early morning, so that you would not be questioned. Your shoes tapping against the stone , leading yourself out of Erebor quickly.

At the top of a set of stairs is when you head it, the pounding against the stone someone was running. Rushing down the stairs , at an increasing speed, trying not to trip. "Y/n?"

Your face. Your race. The way you talk, I kiss you are beautiful. You knew that voice, the voice of a flirt now panic, as you ran towards the entrance of Erebor.

"Y/n, wait!" But you didn't you continued running as fast as you could, ignoring Kili's pleads that echoed through the empty halls. Well, until you tripped landing flat on your face, against the cold stone, just as Kili had.

"Y/n!" Rushing towards you still, he had knelt by you, flipping you on your back, your eyes shut and motionless. "Please , don't be dead." His voice soft, letting out a load dramatic sob, you were not sure if it was real, his hands on your cheeks squishing them. Pushing his hands off you forcefully, sitting up to look at him. The moon light brightening his face from the sark halls, only a few candles were lit.

"I'm not dead; just wanted you to go away." His shoulders sank , as did the smile he gave you, his chestnut eyes dulled looking over your form and your bag.

"Where are you going...y/n?"

There was no point lying, you were clearly going somewhere, no I'm not going anywhere bullshit.

"Gondor."

"Gondor? Gondor?! Why would you go there? What do you have there?" He was not happy, you both just sitting on the cold floor, staring at your feet as Kili stared you down.

"What do I have here? I've done what I was meant to." Kili had scoffed in annoyance his face scrunching up as you stood from the floor.

"You cannot be serious. Y/n/n, please, I was coming to see you before I saw you in the hall. Don't leave."

"Well, that's lovely."

"Y/n, please don't leave me, please..." The voice soft, cracking into a higher pitch, your feet halted in place.

"Walk me back to my room."

With that, Kili did a bright smile on his lips, grabbing your bag, and your hand. As he skipped to your room, pressing a large kiss to your cheek.

"See you in the morning, love!"

You were alone again, sleeping in your bed with all the furs over you, you fell into slumber. What only felt like minutes had been hours , waking up from your door being slammed open. You forgot to lock it... Jumping out of sleep to see who was there, your hair stuck to your face , your eyes sagging.

Closing the door, there stood Kili smiling at you panting, his hair wind swept, leaning against your door. You had let out a groans falling back onto your pillow, your eyes slamming shut. For a moment there was no sound no nothing, but you knew you would not be able to go back to sleep. Especially when Kili had jumped onto your bed, specifically onto the pillow next to yours.

Turning your head to the side, there laid Kili his head held up by his hand with his arm in a triangle. Yeah on his side, that pose, grinning at you.

"Good morning."  Half tempted to grab your pillow and cover his face with it you had let out a moan again, flipping to face the other way. The bed got lighter, Kili had left no he had not, he was going to do something you wouldn't like. Seconds later, the squeaking of draws being opened , hit you, you were not getting more sleep.

Your eyes now wide, after rubbing the sleep from them, sitting up against your pillow- You could clearly see Kili going through your draws picking items of clothing out. Wait, what was he wearing? He had a long brunette wig on. Hold on he was not picking out one outfit, but two. Did he think you were the same size?

"I'll buy you more." Like he knew what you were thinking, he turned and threw some clothing at you. "Hurry up, I need you to help me." His tone serious, not harsh nor loud just differently his flirtatious usual tone. There was no point arguing, the stubbornness of dwarves.

Going behind the divider after peeing you had gotten dressed quickly. "Take your tunic , and pants off, put on the undergarments for when I'm done."  Standing still for a moment Kili watched your shadow, opening his mouth to disagree but quickly closing it. He wondered about how you did not even question what was going on.

After it was clear for you to come out, Kili had thought you would laugh, but instead you loosened corset lifting it over his head and over the shift. "Do you want it tight?" Your casual tone,  caused Kili to become distracted, your hands gripping the strings waiting.

"I'm sorry, did you say t-tight?" Kili looked at you in the body sized mirror his cheeks pinched pink noticing you holding the corset strings.  "Oh, just believable not too tight." Kili's mind was somewhere else. Letting out a dramatic cough at the slightest pull you had decided that was enough, he'd moan for the rest of the day.  You hadn't been used to these dresses either , you rarely wore them, only since you had been in Erebor. That was only for special events, today must be one of them.

The petticoat already on him, helping him into the hoop. Keeping his own shoes, you had pulled the final dress layer on him, helping him with his wig no gloves his hands were too big. Okay he had thick arse, muscular chest so he looked like dam. Kili stood before you, dressed in your clothes, he had only stubble , passing as a Darrow dam would not be hard.

"Truly beautiful, Kee." As he spun around in front of the mirror before stopping in front of you, grinning widely. "You think?" Nodding at him, he spun again. "As do you ,my lady." You had scoffed, as you brushed your hair.

"Why did you need me do this?"  Dramatically he had turned back to you with his mouth open. "You of course, how else am I supposed to get out of my duties, if everyone can recognise me?" That was very clever for Kili anyways, had he been thinking about this for a while?

“Well, what are you going to do today, Miss?”

“We are going to flirt with old men.”

“What?”

“Come on, we have some mischief to cause.”

That’s how you ended up at a ball, which Thorin was fuming because he could not find his nephew, Fili had told Dis that Kili had went to Dale for Bofur. She did not believe it. A ball without a Prince? Disgraceful.

Whereas he was there, with you. Pretending to be well behaved woman as you ate food and drank. Music playing in the background...wait was that Jareth singing? Yes it was, sorry about that, oh and Freddie Mercury? What? I’m sorry Kenobi too?

Men approaching the both of you, Kili laughing along with their jokes, and slapping them ‘gently’ on their shoulders, one had dropped their glass, rubbing their shoulders when walking away.

It was very embarrassing when both of you were facing the food table when you had been tapped on the shoulder. “Can I have a dance, my lady?” Both of you turning around, at the same time, Fili’s eyes widened when seeing it was you.

“Oh, Y/n, you look absolutely lovely, and who is your friend?” His eyes meeting Kili as he sipped his drink, spitting his drink all over Kili. His eyes travelling up and down his brother in shock and disbelief.

“Kili?!”

“Shh! I am Keanu, of the blue mountains.” Fili had looked back at you covering your face from trying not to cry with laughter, his face reddened snorting out a laugh too.

“This was his idea wasn’t it?” Nodding at the Prince he had bust out with laughter, lifting your hand to his lips pressing a kiss to your knuckles before travelling away, towards Dwalin...

“Would you like to dance, y/n?” It was not strange for woman to dance together, nodding, he had grabbed your hand as the song changed, leading you to the floor. Heroes tune playing , anything is possible.

‘And you, you can be mean.’

‘And I, I’ll drink all the time.’

‘Cause we’re lovers’

The two of you elbows locked as you swung around together, dancing around , Kili had even lifted you above his head like he was Patrick Swayze. You told him you couldn’t do that back. Eventually ended up become tired really fast, your heads in each other’s shoulders, careful Kili’s wif did not fall off.

Swaying together, your eyes locking as smiling at each other, giddy. Kili’s eyes flickered down to your lips for split second before returning to your eyes, trouble is what comes from that smirk.

“You know what would really cause a scene?” Shaking your head slightly, frightened, well not really.

“If we kissed, right now.” Your heart pounding in your chest, he wasn’t seriously surely? His hand reaching to cup your chin, his chestnut eyes glistening in the yarn light.

“What are you are you asking, Kili?” You weren’t sure if he even heard your whisper over the noise of the ball.

“Y/n/n, darling, can I kiss you?”

“Yes.” His lips were upon yours pressing a long peck against your soft lips, before pulling away from them. The cold air hitting your lips from the loss of warmth. Cheeks pink ad you looked at Kili. “You know, I love you, Y/n.”

“Yes, I lov-“ Though your confession was cut short, as several gasps had alerted Thorin and most of the original company, as well as Dis. Who all saw some of what had just happened, yes lesbian relationships did happen in middle earth just not often. Nor were they so public.

“Y/n!” Thorin called you other, your hand intertwined with Kili’s you pulled him with you, towards Thorin, Dis, Fili , and Dwalin. Thorin’s disproving gaze on both of you, jealous not disproving, he longed for a certain small fellow.

“I am sorry to disrupt your night with your date, but for your safety I must advise you do n-“ “ Kili?!” Dis had interrupted her brother, Dwalin had sighed under his breath. Thorins head had snapped to his sister looking around for Kili with no luck. Until, he had followed her eyes, to next you.

“Kili?!” Smirking at his uncle, oh gosh he looked like he was going to have a stroke, how could he not see it, this was like Clark Kent with no glasses just a wig.

“Sorry, this is Keanu, Kili is in Dale at the moment.”

[rixxy8173571m3w1p3]

Whatever Keeps You Up At Night

Boy, this fic has been one I've been picking at for months. And while it's not perfect, I think I'm going to go ahead and post it cause I feel pretty good about it. There's a few song, movie, and poem references. I'll be surprised if someone gets them all.

In this fic the reader thinks about sleep

______________________

Clouds drifted across inky skies. Your central heat was cranked up just enough to leave you defrosted, but not any higher in fear it could fail. You thought of getting something to drink, but you didn't want to leave the warmth and comfort of your bed. Winter wasn't your favorite season, but it reminded you of him.

Oh, if you would've been in his home, there certainly would've been more sound. It wouldn't have necessarily come from the house itself, but from him; his breathing, footsteps, or the light whistle of his teeth which covered up his snoring; its sound feeding the springtime in your heart. If you had gone over when he was ready to go to bed, he would've stayed up and entertained you. Yet, none of that could've taken place if he wasn't home. So, you weren't in his home, you were in yours.

In the sharp corners where shadows laid, you dared not step until it was noon. In the daytime, though mostly in the evening was the draft which never went away and gave you a chill; causing you to wrap your duvet closer. It smelled like Ricks detergent, and you were surrounded by the night. You weren't a stranger to its lonesome ways, nor were you acquainted with it, but you existed in it; willing yourself to be anything other than awake. Try as you may, tonight's sleep might not come so readily, because you already begun to think about him and dearly wished he was home; on earth; in this dimension; anywhere close if he could help it; except for right now where it could not be helped that he was on assignment and that you had to be without him much longer then you wished, but you would wait as well as go on because you did have a life; albeit a little bland without him. 

At night, while part of the world was quieting down, other parts were waking up and heading off to work; you could do either; so could he. Sometimes you would work through the night, especially when you had an idea itching to be written, but most often you would sleep; or at least try to sleep with hopes of having sweet dreams; at times your dissociated thoughts having found their way back to you. You had never been much of a dreamer, and you rarely liked to dream; you never felt rested enough in the morning after, but at times it was nice; more so if Rick was in them. Thoughts of how he was doing kept you up at times - as it was doing now - and you could only wonder where in the universe he currently was, but you'd almost forget about it if anxious thoughts took over, and problems you hadn't solved reappeared. Sometimes thoughts of the past intermingled with your dreams; as pleasant or heartbreaking as they could be.

Tossing and turning were options you could accept, but if he was available, you'd call Zeta-7 to hear him, and allow his cheerfulness to ease you into a gentle submission; to relax beyond compare, and leave you in a decent enough mood to doze. Why, you could listen to him explain anything from quantum mechanics to the variety of animal mutations which existed in a galaxy far, far away; to be lulled and softened by his cadence, was a treat you wouldn't have traded for anything in the world. If it happened on the rare chance that you were overcome by exhaustion, you'd just fall asleep as soon as your head hit your pillow; not understanding how or when you'd close your eyes, though you were always grateful when you did. However, if it so happened that you woke up randomly without a cause, but from a feeling, then you knew; you had just missed him; his existence being like a midnight soliloquy; like a ghost, he was sometimes there, but then wasn't; it wasn't that difficult to see why, but it still surprised you nonetheless.

It seemed that once you had given Rick the permission to visit whenever he liked, he did; being woken by the familiarity of his presence on more than one occasion. It was neither ambiguous or obscure, but there, like the air you breathed, being a living, positive force of goodness; vital to your existence. Just when you thought there were no other comparisons to be made, he continued to become and shape himself into the extraterrestrial being that he caused himself to be. Oh, some days you would miss him something fierce, but whenever you'd find yourself so alone, you'd remember that he'd come; whenever it was that he could.

Now, he wasn't sloppy, nor did he hide that he had come by, but he was careful. Quietly, he would check about the house, then would step into your bedroom with caution as though sleeping beauty might wake. At times you only caught the blur which barely stepped out of the doorway, or was soothed by the hand which smoothed out your hair, and other times it was just his scent which lingered; an echo of his existence. Once he sang you a Mexican love song, which made your heart burn, and it seemed interwoven into your half-woken state; having been so drowsy you thought you had dreamt it. And because he worked at random hours, and sometimes for days and weeks at a time, he'd come and lightly kiss you hello and goodbye before going back to work, though your recollections were few. It was precious, and you enjoyed it; at least when you were conscious of it. Most of the time, however, you were only aware of the warmth which touched your cheek and of the blanket which had been placed over you when you were cold; these being the other ways in which he showed you he loved you.

Yet, it happened one night, just as you were about to go to sleep after having spent a better part of the day typing, you saw the familiar green glow in the hallway, and then saw him come through your doorway. He looked at you as though you were a ghost, and you stared into the dark, your nowhere man being there; somewhere out of your reach. As you were about to turn on the light, his gentle touch stopped you. Unsure of what he was about, you didn't struggle as he pulled you into an embrace, but having him squeeze you with all his might, trembling despite himself left you unsettled. “Ricky," you wondered; a flutter of anxiety starting to build in your chest. "what's the matter?”

“I-I-I wish I could just stay here with you,” he began in a low voice; the scent of smoke and disinfectant coming off of him as you rubbed his back. “where n-nothing bad happens.”

He had smelled like this before; as though he had been busy with janitorial duties instead of sorting through papers or lab samples. “Bad day?”

“Y-yeah."

Bad wouldn't be the beginning as to describe it; of that you were sure. You assumed it was another case where he was responsible for the lowly, more humble work which his workmates didn't care to do; or was assigned as to demean him; bullied into doing; likely all of the above. “I'm sorry,” you softened. “I hope it wasn't that bad.”

“It's - I'll b-be fine. I just - I-I had to see you.”

A chill ran through your back. Under any other circumstances, you could've interpreted that as one of his romanticisms, but his quiet desperation brought about a fresh wave of worry instead. "But can you see me in the dark?"

"I wouldn't have been able to if it wasn't for my bionic eye. Did I-I tell you about that yet? I'm sorry if th-that sounds gross."

"I don't know if you told me yet. I guess now is a good time as ever, but maybe you can explain it in detail another day."

"I'm s-sorry, I know you were about t-t-to go to bed, but I - all I could think about was you."

Warmth flooded your cheeks, and you wished you had worn something cuter instead of an old pair of pajamas, but you knew he didn't care. Zeta-7 was lovely that way. You tried to think of something flirty to say in return, but a yawn escaped you instead."Boy, I really have bad timing, d-don't I?" he commented.

"Dear, don't get me wrong, I love having you here," Which was true in all respects, though you wondered if you could put him at ease. "but maybe… perhaps it would be better if we went to the living room. I can get you something warm to drink if you'd like.”

“Y-you don't have to do that." he said in a hurry. "Besides," he continued. "don't - don't I look better this way?”

Wrapping your arms around his neck, you cooed. 

“No, you don't. Why would you say that? I already know you as you are and I can say for certain that you are the light of my life. To me, you've always been handsome. In fact," you smiled up at him; unsure if he could see your sincerity. "you're the man of my dreams. I dream of you, of that darling smile, of your winning personality which lights up my days, and of your sweetness. Your unconditional sweetness. If you don't believe me, you can always check my dreams.”

“Gosh, if life….si la vida pudiera ser u-un sueño," he sighed, "then I'm sure it'd be you. If I-I had the time it'd be nice if we could - if I could dwell there; in that dreamland of yours. I bet it'd be swell, and normally I'd think all of that - all of which you suggested would be swell, but today hasn't been--it hasn't been that kind t-t-to me."

"I know, but isn't there anything I can do for you Rick?"

He didn't answer. You moved a hand to caress his face in hopes of soothing him but instead found a bump on his right cheek which caused him to wince. “What was that?"

"It's - it's nothing."

"Don't you lie to me Ricardo," you reprimanded. "this is something."

Gingerly, you followed where his skin was warmer than usual and was raised. Your heart sank at the thought of what could've happened. "Oh no, did they…. did they hurt you? What happened?"

A noise escaped him, but he neither confirmed nor denied. This, in turn, made you reluctant to want to return him to the monsters, but you knew he would go; whether or not you wanted him to. The villainy which existed in his kind and Zeta-7's rarity made him such an easy target. You had talked to him about it before, about how he should speak up, but the harsh reality of his situation prevented him from doing so, and you wondered how much more would they try to take from him. True, he wasn't a broken man, but even bravery needed its encouragement and you were going to love him all the more for it because that's all you could do at the moment. "My sweet, sweet man, do you know what I love about you?"

Passing a hand through his hair, you were careful not to brush his cheek, to which a sigh escaped him; the likes of it as though he only just now began to calm. You continued. "I love that no matter what, you'll persevere and continue to be determined. You're so strong, that I couldn't be prouder, but please, don't let them take you away from me."

The arms which had almost been lenient in their affection held you a fraction tighter; immovable in the way in which you were grounded. It was as though being in want of comfort, he in turn desired to return in kind; his impalpable emotions giving way to simpler, softer ones.  "I missed you. I-I missed this. Warm hugs and a-affirmation."

"If it's hugs you want," you replied softly. "you can have as many as I can give you. Affirmation? I'll give you enough to reach the moon. I'm no scientist, but somehow, I know you could make it come true."

Warm lips kissed your forehead, and a relieved chuckle brushed your cheek.  "The math w-would be nearly impossible."

"So there's a chance." you giggled.

Leaning in close enough, he pressed his forehead to yours. "Yes, th-there is if you believe it enough."

"I do believe, but more so I believe in you. How...how can it be that someone as incredible as you would be harmed by people who look the same? To hurt my man of all people? I ought to get some training and become your bodyguard or something. It just isn't right for anyone else to touch even a hair on your head."

“It um - it was an accident. I sh-should've been paying attention to where I was going. I know it seems bad, but it isn't." which you knew wasn't completely true. "However, I'll get it treated. I-I promise.”

"Why don't you let me take a look at it? I have a first aid kit in the hallway. And while I never finished my medical training, I know enough to treat this. Please, why not let me play nurse and help you feel a little better?"

“M-mi corazón, I would rather y-you don't see it. It looks worse th-then it actually is, but it's fine. Really, I-I swear it is. You've already done more than enough.”

Pulling away a bit, you wondered. "Have I? It seems all I've done is talk you into oblivion, but what about you?" 

"Wh-what about me?" he wondered.

"It isn't like you to swear. I haven't heard you swear yet." you teased, pressing a soft kiss on his injury. "I doubt I ever will." 

"It's not th-that kind of swear," he began to explain, but then he stopped, thought for a bit, then chuckled. "but I-I-I see what you're - I understand the joke."

You noticed that Zeta-7 avoided standing in the moonlight, and while you couldn't really see him, you didn't relent in your expressions. “Man, if I would've known you were coming over, I would've dressed up a little and made sure there was extra food for you to eat. I'm sorry.”

“It's alright, I-I already ate. I finally used my coupon for Rick's Diner near main street."

Playing with the collar of his sweater you wondered. "Was it any good?"

"It um - it was alright, but I think next time I'll pack some food to warm up. You um - you smell nice by the way. I'm sorry if I-I smell.”

By now, you had gotten used to the variety of smells which could've wafted off him. He had smelled better and worse before, but that only added to his curious ways and charms. "Well, if you're so worried about it, then why don't you stop being so shy and come a little closer. That way you could smell like me."

The silence which proceeded was almost frightening. Hmm, you might've gone too far again, but you couldn't help yourself; half the time he opened the way for light teasing. And yet, you had told yourself before that it wasn't so kind to play with an old man's heart; despite the best of intentions, it might not have been perceived that way, but in the quiet of the room, you could feel his mature heart quicken at your words, and the light rustle of clothes as he fidgeted despite himself. He was so adorable, it was almost criminal, but before he could stumble upon himself in embarrassment, you added. "I was just kidding. Goodness, I guess I have bad timing too. At least where jokes are concerned. Still, to have you here…it's better than a dream."

Again, there was a silence that proceeded and you felt the tug of doubt, but he broke the silence with his sincerity. "I-I never thought you - that I'd be so lucky to enjoy moments like th-this. Let alone with a-a woman."

"In the dark?"

"Whenever. I'm s-sorry I still get embarrassed, but you make me nervous at times. Y-you can be a little unpredictable."

"Good," you brightened. "keeps things exciting. Though, everytime you say something like that, it makes me wonder if it'd be the last time I'd hear you say it. It better not be."

"In my line of work," he admitted solemnly, "there's always a-a chance of that happening, but it's not - I don't like to think about it. However, it does make me appreciate that I'm able to have someone when I - when I'm lonely. I know how pitiful that sounds and how much I repeat it, but you don't know how it's been a great comfort. If you weren't here I'd…"

Though the words died in his throat. You had a feeling as to what he might've meant to say, and frankly, you were glad to not have heard them. Rubbing his back, you cooed. "It's okay. It's all going to be fine. I don't mind how many times you tell me, because I know how much you mean it. I'm right here if you need me. As I am now, and always will be. If you'd like anything...if you need to or want some fresh clothes to change into, I'm sure I can find something around here that might fit. If you want to stay here with me, that's ok too. Whatever you need, I'll be happy to help."

"Allowing me t-t-to come here is more than enough." 

Resting a hand on his chest you wondered. "Are you sure? You could stay. Couldn't you stay?"

"I-I wish I could princess. You don't know how much I'd rather be here, but I-I don't want them coming here t-t-to retrieve me, so it's better if I go soon."

"Why?"

"If the guard Rick's have to retrieve me one too many times, they might limit my portal gun use and I'd rather avoid that."

"I swear, I think there's a curse keeping us apart."

Caressing your cheek with the pad of his thumb, he chuckled. “By now, I ugh - I suppose I've become a bit of a broken record, but I promise I'll make it up to you. Curses and swearing aside that is."

"I know."

You didn't want him to go. Not back to those people who couldn't appreciate him. How he put up with it you didn't know. “Maybe one of these days, you could skip out on work and we'll go somewhere. Maybe we could go to Blips and Chitz, and I'll try that one dance game designed for spider people. Wouldn't that be nice? Then we could go see the Jerry's and I can get asked embarrassing questions all about you. How does that sound?”

Bending down to kiss you, he winced but kissed you nonetheless. “That would be swell, but w-we can't go tonight. I-I should get going. I had wanted to make sure you were safe, but it's nice t-t-to see you up. I hope you didn't mind me barging in this way.”

“I don't mind, but I only wish that I could be awake more often when you're here.”

“I-I know, but it's okay. I usually can't stay for long anyway.”

What a shame it really was. You hid your face in his chest, relishing in the warmth and softness of his sweater while you still could; foolishly hoping that he would change his mind. Who would've known he could be so stubborn. Then again, you couldn't find fault in that. “Maybe if I ask the sandman hard enough to bring me a dream," you admitted in a girlish voice. "then I'll see you again real soon."

"I will see you. Y-you only have to look for me."

"In my dreams?"

"If y-you believe."

You pulled him in for a kiss then, pressing peck after peck knowing that he would disappear. You knew he didn't get enough affection already, and he'd have to make due with what you could give him, but was it really enough? You'd never know. With one arm around you, his other was digging around in his pockets for his portal gun. And just as his fingers lightly brushed it, you stopped him and handed him your favorite stuffed animal. “Huh? F-for me?”

“Mhm. That's Bimbo, he'll be sure to keep you safe. He um…my dad had always told me that this stuffy would keep me safe and I consider him one of the dearest friends in the world, but right now I know I'm not the only one who could use a friend. I'm sure he'd be happy to keep you company for a while."

"But h-he's important to you."

"True, but you're the most important to me. Now, something to remember is that he likes to give plenty of hugs and enjoys tea parties, though he would never readily admit it."

"I-I like those things too."

"See? You two are going to be good friends. There's no doubt that you two will get along."

The arm which had been holding you about your waist held you a fraction tighter, and if you hadn't given him a light push, he might've not been encouraged to go. “You gotta let me go now. I don't want you to get in trouble. Please, just make sure to return to me in one piece. Understand?.”

“Yes, I-I-I do. I will.” he answered, before opening a portal and stepping through. 

The warmth he had brought was already growing cold. And checking the time, you were sure that you weren't going to get a wink. So dragging the duvet cover with you, you plopped yourself on the couch and flipped through Interdimensional cable, until you found a movie you've might've watched a dozen times before; snuggling into the pillow that still smelled like him; hoping that he will be fine.

Fin

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Jimmy

Janis: 💀👑 having a party Jimmy: Where's my handwritten 💌? Jimmy: bit rude Janis: not enough 🩸 Janis: 💔 Janis: [pic of jelly shots and other basic party tings taking up cali's fridge] Jimmy: 🙄 Jimmy: if you ain't fucked with them, I'm dumping you Janis: it's like you don't know me at all 😱😏 Jimmy: Oi, it's a secret, that Janis: not tweeted it yet, we're safe Jimmy: tah, Judy Jimmy: what's the 👗👠 then? Janis: 🤔 Janis: it's either taking their 'style', lack of a better word, and doing it better, 'cos duh Janis: OR doing the anti-them so hard she'll be 😡 the second we walk in Jimmy: so do you want me in 👗👠 or looking like I slept in the park with nowt but a 🔪 and an empty wallet? Janis: both hot 🔥 Janis: probably hates poors slightly more than crossdressers 💙 Jimmy: have I got time to get a vote labour face tattoo? Janis: only if it's misspelled 💘 Jimmy: Duh Jimmy: trying to work out what 🎨 I could get to show I hate lawyers Jimmy: no win no fee finger tats? Janis: 😂 Janis: full of the 🥇💡s today Jimmy: downside being Ian might reckon it's 🥇💡 an' all, I'd have to ❌ 'em out or cover 'em up with something that'll get him fuming before he realises Jimmy: or put the 👗👠 on as well as Janis: that'll do it Janis: dress on a lad is still a dress on a lad, even if it's red Jimmy: getting into a 🥊 with him would only help the cause, nowt more common than a black eye and chipped tooth Janis: not had enough time for my fake pillow baby to be showing, WELL gutted 😭 Jimmy: can make the announcement on the night 🍾 be a lovely surprise for her Janis: godmother, anyone? 🙊 Jimmy: only right after we conceived it in her bunk 💕 Janis: solid HILARIOUS lad speech story, hun 👌 Jimmy: especially when I add in that I ain't sure and it could've been her desk in computer science 😘 Jimmy: oh the #bants Janis: me, tryna remember that time 💭👀 Jimmy: you and sir both Jimmy: draw the line at fake naming it after her though, what's her dad called? Janis: who knows Janis: Mike, John, Peter, Paul etc etc Jimmy: UGH fine we'll call the kid Jeremy Janis: gonna start doing #babytaylor updates around the 🕞 Jimmy: same Janis: graphic details of the abortion, good times, like Jimmy: but the #datenight in hell after is gonna be 🔥 soooooooooo Janis: 💁 #hatersgonnahate #dontmumshameme #howtolosethepregnancypounds Jimmy: 😏 Janis: she lives ages from both of us so where do you wanna meet? Jimmy: middle? Janis: his MIND 🤤 Jimmy: it don't matter to me actually now your ankle's loads better and I ain't gotta carry you the whole way Janis: said as if that were my preference, ever Janis: or that I'm well fat Jimmy: you were warned I'm 👴 and on death's door, mate Jimmy: I've had my 😭 about it but crack on with yours Janis: what else can be said about your stamina at this point, eh Janis: my cross to bear Jimmy: nowt 'cause I can't be all ears for your fake complaints after being deafened by your real praise Janis: if you're so gutted, I can promise you'll never 🔊 it again Jimmy: can you? doubt that Janis: see how easy Jimmy: alright Janis: 👍 Jimmy: come here then Janis: where? Jimmy: where am I round the 🕞 Janis: UGH, don't remind me Janis: my biggest fake complaint 🥺 Jimmy: baby Janis: NEVER see you Jimmy: but I'm ALWAYS 💭💕 about you Janis: that'll be why Mia don't tip 💅 Jimmy: yeah that's TOTALLY the reason Janis: if you're THAT distracted how can you possibly remember how to make a decent latte?! Janis: if you're THAT distracted how can you possibly remember how to make a decent latte?! Jimmy: 1. there's no such thing as a decent latte 2. I could have you up on the counter and still make whatever ☕ dickheads want Janis: 1. okay got me there 2. not gonna have me there 'cos I'm nowhere near town so 💔 Jimmy: like I said ALWAYS 💭💕 Jimmy: and always fucking here 🕞 Janis: you're saying got time for that bus journey but how do I know it'd be worth it? Jimmy: I didn't promise to go mute on you for a start Janis: yeah? Jimmy: got loads to say, me Jimmy: [🔥 sext because why not] Janis: it's like that then Jimmy: it's however you like, you know that Janis: okay Janis: I want to see you Jimmy: okay Jimmy: I want you here Janis: I feel it Jimmy: I can promise you will Janis: you haven't forgotten just how long this bus ride takes, have you? Jimmy: no Janis: so you're being mean to me on purpose Jimmy: you started it by taking the piss out of my stamina Jimmy: this is just me showing you how much I've got Janis: but I'm already so Jimmy: and what I'm sitting here dead unfazed, do you reckon? Janis: I don't Janis: I think about you too, for real Jimmy: do you? Janis: yeah Janis: if I was good with words I could tell you about it but Jimmy: it's alright, you can show me Janis: when I'm with you, yeah Janis: what about all the times I'm not? Jimmy: you're decent enough at leaving reminders, I think I'll live Janis: you might Jimmy: how full's your 🚍 gonna be? Janis: this time? Janis: 👻town Jimmy: nowt to worry about then, is there? Janis: ? Jimmy: a 💣 could go off and who's about to see or hear it Jimmy: just us Janis: and the driver Jimmy: he'll be chatting to his mate or missus like the one before Jimmy: and you're gonna be 🔇 so you said Janis: 🤏 rude I'm now not that distracting at all, apparently but Janis: okay Jimmy: if he's that into it he can be our 3rd Janis: I'd ask but 😶 Jimmy: it'll go without saying, don't worry Janis: go on then Janis: you have to fill in the silence and tell me what you really think about me 💭💕 Jimmy: [a voice memo to make it even more of a #mood and to make me lol cos do you ever do any work boy] Janis: has anyone ever told you your voice isn't a total turn-off Jimmy: it ain't a compliment that usually gets chucked at me Janis: they're stupid then Janis: more than I reckoned Jimmy: don't talk to them, do I? Jimmy: just you Janis: oh yeah, suppose not Janis: count myself 🍀 Jimmy: dunno about that but you're alright to 🗨 to Janis: known worse, like Jimmy: tah very much Janis: you don't like compliments Jimmy: I never said that Jimmy: I don't know how to take 'em Jimmy: same as you Janis: it's when it's Janis: if you just said the same shit everyone says, it wouldn't even register Janis: but you ain't ever that predictable Jimmy: you're not a lass that's gonna get bog standard bollocks out of me Jimmy: 🥇 muse Janis: I can handle that Janis: you're pretty talented Jimmy: if you're the masterpiece, how could I fuck that up? Jimmy: barely have to do owt for it to be art Janis: be surprised how a lad can, 'cept not at all Jimmy: letdowns don't surprise me, whoever they're off 🌧 remember Jimmy: have had and have done loads, it's why the 😒 face fits Janis: you're far from a letdown to me, where it counts, like Janis: have that for free Jimmy: don't count for much when it's been days Jimmy: even Ian can manage to keep a lass about for that long sometimes Jimmy: but alright Janis: well it's all I've got Janis: and as I said, had worse Janis: you're free to disappoint me any time Jimmy: yeah, me an' all, but no need for me to chuck all the comparisons to my shit ex at you and pretend it'll do for a compliment Jimmy: or pretend that I wanna disappoint you Janis: It don't matter, we know it's inevitable but we also know we don't need to think about that right now Jimmy: it matters a bit Janis: not enough that we can do fuck all about it Jimmy: I just Janis: me too Jimmy: it ain't fair that you can 🧠📖 Janis: can't really Janis: could've agreed to anything there but fuck it, why not Jimmy: that's why I like you Janis: obviously Janis: whole plan hinges on it Jimmy: nowt to do with how fit and mysterious you are Janis: 🤏 tah Jimmy: Oi, I've been telling you how fit you are from day one Janis: don't stop Jimmy: not til it actually 💀💀💀s me Jimmy: how ain't there bollocks rumours about you being a model or an actress an' all? Janis: that'd be 😤💚 not 🤤💖 Janis: anyway, the school trip before the last, some scout came up to me and I thought the gals might actually murder her, or drown her with their 😭😭😭😭😭 Jimmy: right, it's different for lasses, so I've heard off you loads of times now Janis: and lads lack the imagination, not the kind of model or actress they're arsed about Jimmy: and that were why you didn't wanna do it then? Janis: didn't really have a chance, Lucas told her it was highly inappropriate to approach a child on a school trip, code for 'hands-off she's mine' 🙄 Jimmy: I get it, you can only find out who people are when I read their tits and tell you Janis: obviously Janis: got the card if you really wanna kickstart your career Jimmy: I just dunno why you don't, it'd be 💰💰 and a 💀👑 fuck you Janis: yeah but it's complicated Jimmy: which bit? the walk or the pout? Janis: very funny, dickhead Janis: 🥇 muse, so I've been told Jimmy: exactly Jimmy: why wouldn't you wanna get the fuck out of here? Janis: there's no guarantee that would happen Janis: might never get booked, or whatever the fuck they call it Jimmy: alright, you're scared of looking a twat Jimmy: but you're never getting booked if your name ain't down Jimmy: don't tell anyone you 🖋🩸 if nowt happens Janis: we've got well distracted from the point here anyway Jimmy: the new point is, stop being a selfish prick and think how 🥇 it'd make me look to have a model girlfriend, tah very much Janis: 🙄😏 you're the fucking worst Jimmy: kindly crack on 'cause I ain't gonna be about forever, like Janis: 👴 Jimmy: ✈👋 or ⚰🌹 either'll do Janis: know which one you meant Jimmy: it weren't me saying you can't 🧠📖 Janis: no brain to pick, you 💘 Jimmy: bit rude Jimmy: yeah alright, that lass who tried to snatch you off the school trip'd know more than me but I still reckon you'd be good Janis: shh Jimmy: 🤐 Jimmy: meant to be you on mute though Janis: my point about the point exactly Janis: make it hard for me to speak in a fun way, dickhead Jimmy: [giving her pics because she gave him that glorious dressing room selfie and we know he looks good whenever even when he's supposed to be working lol] Janis: Jesus, boy Janis: how do you just look like that Jimmy: #notamodelbutmyfakegirfriendis Janis: definitely not doing it so you have a 🔥 # Jimmy: but LITERALLY what other reason is there???!! 😱😱 #s are EVERYTHING babe Janis: I know, hardest decision I've ever had to make Jimmy: I'm leaving now, I just think Jimmy: you're so Jimmy: *it Janis: I reckon you are too Janis: like Janis: normal lads don't look like you do Jimmy: I can't fake that hard it being a northern thing Jimmy: 💔 if that means my parents weren't shit at everything Janis: same but that ain't news to me Janis: people LOVE being vocal about how fit my mum is Jimmy: bit rude of everyone to fake Grace being your twin when she's really adopted 🎻 Janis: she looks like my dad's mum and she's devastated, is a gutting comparison however you slice it Jimmy: I should've done more 🎻🎻 Jimmy: I get it, I look like Ian so every other dickhead reckons Janis: 🤏 rude of you to say he weren't fit but I'll allow it Jimmy: 🤏💔 he's my biological father 🤞 the other two can still cut and run Janis: seen your socials that ain't got me in, the kid looks like a small clone of you so 🌧 Jimmy: 💰 on my sister then Janis: usually the middle child Jimmy: she's got his 😡 and it can't be nurture as he don't fucking do none so Jimmy: that's all of us fucked Janis: shit, ain't it Janis: couple my sisters escaped having the same dad but my ma's got terrible taste so theirs weren't no better 💔 Jimmy: how many do you have? Janis: 4 sisters and a brother Jimmy: bet he were 💔 growing up Janis: yeah we made him well gay Jimmy: don't @iantaylor8 Janis: he ain't about to gay bash so it's alright Janis: about to have a gaybie though so pop off on that one Jimmy: he'd be well chuffed to hear he can still have grandkids to bully even though he reckons we're all gay Janis: weird flex on your nature and nurture there, mate Jimmy: duh it's MY fault not his Jimmy: couldn't keep my ex from sleeping with half the north 'cause I obvs weren't and turned them onto a gay lifestyle while I wasn't at it 🙄 Jimmy: #myinfluence Janis: Is Bill your dad? Janis: the drama, the top class storytelling 👌👏 Jimmy: 🤞 you've still got that quill you borrowed Janis: if you fancy it, I'll come about and loudly let him know how gay you ain't Jimmy: he'd have to be about for that plan to work Jimmy: if we held our breath we wouldn't need the 💀💀💀 pact Janis: probably can't turn up at his workplace, yeah, bit weird Jimmy: ☕ delivery Jimmy: just brought my muse so I can do top latte art Janis: unrelated but where is the nearest storage cupboard, tah Jimmy: nowt to see here but everything to hear soz Jimmy: you'd have to break your vow of silence any road, can't have that Janis: not a nun, not an eternal vow Janis: just 'til you admit you like hearing it Jimmy: don't need to tell me on either count Jimmy: and I never denied that I like hearing you Janis: you were taking the piss Janis: so now you're gonna have to be well nice before I even consider it Janis: which is very 💔 for me 'cos I like making noise for you Jimmy: I've been SO nice since Janis: could you be nicer? 🤔 Jimmy: you tell me Jimmy: how can I? Janis: tell me what we're going to do at this party Jimmy: whose house is it at? Janis: #2 Jimmy: we'll find her fave bathroom then, she's bound to spend more time there than owt else Jimmy: ruin it for her Janis: anything that keeps her off the 🚽 is a 🏆 for us Jimmy: we can work out where her 🛏 is after Janis: probably four-poster Jimmy: probably be pretty hard to break Jimmy: but I'm up for the challenge if you are Janis: of course Janis: who am I? Jimmy: you're Jimmy: 🥇 Janis: you're fucking Janis: so good Jimmy: you Janis: you you you Jimmy: if it's owt to do with me it'll be 'cause you've inspired me Janis: I'll take that Jimmy: do Jimmy: it's right Janis: I'm already bored of being on this bus Jimmy: it takes the piss but I need to see you Janis: I want it too Janis: takes the piss I live in the middle of nowhere Jimmy: I'll move you in when Jeremy's born, you're alright Janis: #1 dad Janis: get your own mug Jimmy: *🏆 Janis: bit demanding, babe Jimmy: what kind of dad can I be if I don't have nowt to put my 🥃 in? Jimmy: size matters, babe Janis: 😏 Janis: join you once he thing is out Janis: only 🍷🍷 Jimmy: @ Helena for 💊 Jimmy: your back will be killing you Janis: if he's got a head size of yours, I'll 💀💀💀 Jimmy: I'll 🔪 it out for you, what could be more #goals? Janis: basically a doctor 😍 Jimmy: wasted on just giving 🧽 baths, me Janis: not quite bubbles and 🍾 but Jimmy: when we get to the party, you can have that Janis: we can? Jimmy: if you want Janis: what do you want? Jimmy: What kind of question is that? Janis: one you never answer Jimmy: one you know the answer to Janis: no Jimmy: yeah Janis: 😡 Jimmy: I want you, dickhead Jimmy: I've said it before Janis: not a 🚨⛓ to wanna hear it Jimmy: 💔 love a crime, keeps me in a job Janis: I'll commit another, hang on Jimmy: 😍 Janis: pretty sure how you're tryna make me feel in public is illegal Jimmy: 🚔'd quicker than the 🚍 Jimmy: and hang on, isn't it working? Janis: if only Janis: it's not not working, but it'd work better if you were here Jimmy: brb just gotta change uniforms 👮🚔🚨 Jimmy: be with you in a sec Janis: love a chase scene Jimmy: 💕 Janis: reckon this driver is a new boy too Janis: going well slow Jimmy: Oi don't lump me in with him Janis: you can still be 🍦 of the month, it's okay Jimmy: is it? first my stamina gets slagged off now it's my tempo Jimmy: gonna need a complaints 🗑 if you keep on Janis: babe Jimmy: soz I didn't ask you to fake 👰💍🤵 or 🤰 on day one, like Jimmy: dead slow, me ��💔 Janis: like, do you even fake like me, OMG Jimmy: busted Jimmy: reckon you're a bit of a dickhead tbh Janis: 😱😱😱 Janis: brb, throwing myself under this bus Janis: probably going too slow to kill me, THANKS Jimmy: see, what's to like, can't even stick to the plan, you Janis: nu-uh Janis: 'cos I'm NOT dying, but you'll show and think I have and go and off yourself Jimmy: 🤏 Janis: don't you 🤏 at me Janis: cheek Jimmy: keeping 🔇 is one thing but denying you're dying right now is Jimmy: I know you are Jimmy: me an' all Janis: it's very inconvenient Janis: wanting you this much Jimmy: weren't part of the plan Janis: exactly Jimmy: but Janis: too late to stop ourselves now Jimmy: not if you want to Janis: I don't Janis: you know that Jimmy: Alright Janis: it is alright, ain't it Jimmy: with me Janis: you're hot, I'm hot, why wouldn't we Jimmy: I'm not gonna give you a list of why it's a 🥉💡 to do this Janis: we'll survive Jimmy: I don't care if I don't Jimmy: 💀💀💀 me Janis: hot Jimmy: I am, you are, you just said Janis: but seriously Janis: you are so Jimmy: I get it, you're taking 💀💀💀 me seriously an' all Jimmy: right now Janis: you have no idea Janis: if I was even as half as good with words Janis: you might feel a fraction of how I'm feeling Jimmy: I do though, you're doing a decent job of telling me Jimmy: and making me feel like I Jimmy: could just Janis: just Jimmy: 💀💀💀 here in front of everyone Janis: oh Jimmy: inconvenient, I think that were what you said Janis: on the counter, that's what you said Janis: what I'm 💭 Jimmy: I'm not closing up but when I am next Janis: promise Jimmy: are you asking me if I do or telling me you do? Janis: asking you to Jimmy: I wouldn't have said it else Jimmy: but okay Janis: your fake manager better not show up Jimmy: he gets us to so he don't have to Jimmy: 👻🥊 Janis: just saying, some prior warning if you wanna third Janis: no 💌 for you Jimmy: I'm alright with leaving the rest of the dickheads out Janis: good to know Janis: 'cos I don't really rate anyone else right now so Jimmy: I've never rated anyone 🥇 as you Janis: you don't need to chat me up Janis: I'm there already Jimmy: it's just a bit of honesty Jimmy: nowt to worry about Janis: you mean it? Jimmy: Why would I have bothered to say it if it weren't? Janis: I dunno Jimmy: the answer is that I wouldn't Janis: alright, I believe you Jimmy: 👍 Janis: me too Jimmy: ? Janis: I ain't rated anyone else this hard either Jimmy: it's the accent Janis: maybe Jimmy: when you're going all about modelling you'll hear some right ones Janis: obvs Janis: let you know your final ranking then, like Jimmy: Tah Janis: all the male models will be gay Jimmy: chuck them my number Jimmy: Ian will be well chuffed Janis: can't have that Jimmy: Oi, just 'cause you're the first I've fake dated no need to make sure you're the only Janis: you wanna real date them, don't lie Janis: make you look well 🥇 Jimmy: it weren't enough for you to make your brother gay, I'm next now Janis: yeah, my agenda Janis: if you spread that around, I'll 🥊 you Jimmy: UGH fine, I'll delete the tweet Janis: dick Janis: 😏 Jimmy: 😘 Janis: how old was you, when you got with your ex Jimmy: why? Jimmy: if you're undercover 👮 an' all, I might believe we're #fated Janis: 💔 now I'm #gutted Janis: dunno, just asking Jimmy: 🎻🎻😭 dunno what we're pissing about at if we're not 🖋 in the 💫 Janis: I'll turn 'round, you're right Janis: been fun Jimmy: 👋 Jimmy: good luck getting that pout and walk sorted out Janis: good luck getting a new muse Jimmy: probably just give up 🎨 nbd Janis: yeah right Janis: it's your 💘 and life Jimmy: don't sound like me, that Janis: come be my personal 📸 and I'll think about it Jimmy: no expert but I don't reckon that's how it works Janis: then I don't wanna Jimmy: you don't need me to hold your hand Jimmy: 🏆💪 you Janis: don't like having my photo taken Jimmy: fake it then Jimmy: you've had loads of practice Janis: true Jimmy: I'll take more, you won't give a shit about 📸 by the time I've been dumped Janis: like it when you do Janis: maybe it's your process Jimmy: I'm sure any photographer'd be chuffed to have a crack at doing the same for you Jimmy: won't be as fit and mysterious as me but Jimmy: you'll live Janis: 🙌 Jimmy: 🥇💡 to keep the pull out and pray method in mind, take a bit of the homeland with you Janis: ha ha ha Janis: shut up now Jimmy: not having my fake baby raised by other photographers Janis: doubt I fancy explaining that sentence to anyone else Jimmy: you don't fancy it, nowt of Jimmy: so alright, I'll leave it out Jimmy: 🤐 Janis: it's all bullshit Janis: nothing real about it Jimmy: the 💰💰 is Jimmy: and ✈🌏 Janis: I'm not a Hadid Jimmy: I dunno who that is Janis: it'd be less 🤩 and more, local ads and old lady catalogs Jimmy: and what? Janis: ❌💰💰✈🌏 Janis: ✔ 🚌🚍 Jimmy: ✔🐕🏃 then Janis: so soz it ain't as glamorous Jimmy: I doubt standing about in 👙👗👠 waiting for 📸 is Janis: yeah Janis: stupid Jimmy: like the lasses who'd be 😤💚 or 😭💔 Janis: literal Janis: must not know you can't ask the photographer to facetune you just how you like Janis: the breakdowns they'd have with the proofs would be worth it Jimmy: the Q&A they'd die for but'll never get 'cause you're out Jimmy: 🎻🎻 Janis: hmm Janis: could fake that Jimmy: a career? yeah works for Mia's dad Janis: 😂 Janis: my 🥇 inspo forever Jimmy: obvs Janis: sorted then Jimmy: 👍 Janis: be selling skinny tea on the socials in no time Jimmy: I'm not even gonna ask what the fuck that is Janis: laxatives Janis: 😋 Jimmy: 💀👑 would have to be fake nice to you for the discount Jimmy: not gonna put them on daddy's 💳 Janis: he's all about triggering that gag reflex Jimmy: my 🥇 inspo forever Janis: 😏 Janis: nice Jimmy: I am yeah Jimmy: SUCH a good lad Janis: not gonna disagree Jimmy: but you LOVE disagreeing with me, Judith Janis: maybe I LOVE making you feel like a lad more Jimmy: there's nowt you 💕 more than a challenge, I get it Janis: 'course Janis: far as you know Jimmy: #thickandnorthern Janis: #fitandmysterious Jimmy: don't remind me Janis: what else do you have to think about that's more fun than me? Jimmy: tip jar Janis: 💔😭 damn, can't compete Jimmy: gonna fare piss poor in this fake divorce now you've ❌💰💰✈🌏 Jimmy: gotta do something Janis: never would've got a penny out of me Janis: not a mug Jimmy: with Mia's dad having to choose sides it'll be 💔😭 all round Janis: how it's meant to be, isn't it Janis: get the best #drama out of the break-up Janis: Bill'll be happy, at least Jimmy: he'll be LIVING Jimmy: #ghostbants Janis: wow Janis: 🤓 Jimmy: am I ready to be a dad or what? Janis: you've got the jokes and the fashion, babe Jimmy: working on the body obvs 🍻🥔🥧 Janis: can't wait to be disgusted by you 💘 Jimmy: helping you fake your morning sickness is just the kind of lad I am Janis: don't need 💀👑 tips Jimmy: 💔😭🎻 for her Janis: good thing she's got the gals to look up to her Janis: not #2 she's clearly better at it, but the other ones Jimmy: I hope she goes live the day she does her in for surpassing her at starvation Jimmy: always need 💀💀💀 tips Jimmy: 🤞🥇💡 Janis: not gonna be as good as ours Jimmy: no need for us to make it look like an accident Jimmy: I know what I want Jimmy: not a tease like those pair Janis: if you were gonna lead me on that much Jimmy: you'd actually have to fake it Jimmy: can't have that Janis: shut up Janis: I'm 🥇 Jimmy: but still ain't been scouted as an actress have you, mate? Jimmy: says it all Janis: 'cos no one knows I'm in character Janis: called method acting, look it up dickhead Jimmy: you know I can't read Jimmy: bit bloody insensitive that you keep bringing it up Janis: 💁 Jimmy: be about right Janis: you started it Jimmy: bollocks Janis: you did too Jimmy: I never Janis: 😒 Jimmy: Oi don't be copying me Jimmy: [a 😒 selfie cos he's a nerd] Janis: oi yourself when you know that's a #kinkunlocked Janis: very rude Jimmy: or very nice Janis: you reckon? Jimmy: you don't? Jimmy: could just leave you with your 💭 Janis: subtle hint Jimmy: I know 🏆 Janis: dunno how good a photo you reckon I can take on this bus but Janis: challenge accepted Jimmy: you said you were 🥇 Janis: not at Jimmy: I rate you Janis: only 'cos I know you've got no mates to send 'em to Jimmy: bit rude Jimmy: that why you're always trying to set me up on playdates? Janis: 1. when? 2. 'cos I want any nudes I do to get better views? yeah, obvs Jimmy: any teacher or coworker for a start Janis: that's you, you're insatiable Jimmy: tweet that and keep your nudes out of it Janis: blame me for your 😍 Janis: psh Jimmy: it's your fault Janis: nah Jimmy: yeah Janis: shh Jimmy: I can't 🔊 me Janis: I can Janis: call it your literary voice Jimmy: I still don't believe you can Janis: why not? Jimmy: experience Janis: what does that mean Jimmy: it means you never 🤐 Janis: 😑 Jimmy: 😏 Janis: you're a twat Jimmy: yeah Janis: literally not talking to you ever again Jimmy: sounds fake that does Janis: you'll see Jimmy: I don't want to Janis: well Jimmy: well you're still 🗨 Janis: alright Jimmy: 👍 Janis: bye Jimmy: in a bit then Janis: yeah, party Jimmy: funny Janis: is it? Jimmy: what are you gonna do, get straight back on that 🚍 when you come off? Janis: I've got shit I can do, tah for the concern Jimmy: alright Janis: bit of a pisstake, actually Jimmy: what? Janis: you've dragged me out Jimmy: done nowt of the sort Janis: yes you have Jimmy: never made you do owt, real or fake Janis: you know what I mean Jimmy: I know you're being a dickhead Janis: then stop replying if that's what you reckon Jimmy: it ain't me who don't wanna talk Jimmy: that's your party trick Janis: it's me who talks too much Janis: can't have it both ways Jimmy: I didn't say I wanted it a different way Janis: stop being a headfuck Jimmy: stop taking what I say wrong Janis: if I could, I would Jimmy: why can't you? Janis: it's me, not you Janis: you just said it Jimmy: no need to make it sound like the start of a breakup Janis: how would you like me to say it Jimmy: just listen to me, how about that? Jimmy: I like how much you talk Jimmy: I like talking to you Janis: but then I don't know what to say back Janis: it's compliments Jimmy: I don't mind not having any back Jimmy: silence is alright an' all as long as it's not a 💔 one Janis: it's not fair Janis: you should feel uncomfortable and all, like Jimmy: I don't feel anything 👻 perks Janis: yeah Jimmy: I'll stop if it makes you feel better Jimmy: signing only or something Janis: I don't feel anything either, that's what you don't get Jimmy: fuming is a feeling, girl Janis: so's 😒 Janis: but we both know, not really Jimmy: we both know that's just my face Janis: sure Jimmy: go on Janis: you clearly feel shit Janis: and it ain't just me that don't like talking about it, that's as obvious Jimmy: What are you the 💕😭😒 👮? Janis: 🙄 just don't chat shit about my party trick when you're doing the same Jimmy: how am I? Jimmy: I've said loads to you Janis: I've said shit to you too Janis: I'm talking about now Jimmy: what about now? Janis: you're being weird Jimmy: what does that mean? Janis: dunno Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: let's leave it Jimmy: 👌 Janis: I dunno about any of this, alright Jimmy: and I do? Janis: more than me Jimmy: how'd you work that out? Janis: you've done it before Jimmy: no I've not Janis: real is more of a challenge, if anything, not less, so Jimmy: weren't disputing that Janis: so you have Jimmy: no I've not Jimmy: it weren't the same Janis: obviously not Janis: not at the core Janis: but there's still shit you can use Jimmy: oh yeah, hang on I'll crack on and❌ out whatever I can't then it'll be piss easy Janis: I'm not saying that it weren't real with your ex, you don't need to get defensive Jimmy: you're being a massive twat Janis: not trying to Jimmy: leave it, like you said Janis: alright then Jimmy: 👍 Janis: 👍 Jimmy: Why would you say that? Janis: what part? Jimmy: that there's shit I can use Janis: not like a bad thing Janis: just pointing out it's harder for me Jimmy: how isn't it a bad thing to reckon I can just swap out one lass for another? Janis: if this was real, maybe Janis: just meant experience, like Jimmy: right Janis: I didn't mean it as a diss Jimmy: I'll dry my eyes then, tah for clearing that up Janis: yeah, yeah 😏 Jimmy: ✔ Janis: harsh Jimmy: if this were real, might be Janis: okay Janis: got it Jimmy: I don't reckon you do Janis: you never do Jimmy: alright, it's my fault Jimmy: that sounds real enough Janis: yeah, exactly what I was after Janis: cheers and tah Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: what do you want? Janis: don't you know that and all Jimmy: just asking for the fun of it, me Janis: letdown all 'round then Jimmy: it's been said Janis: not by me Jimmy: ⬆ there Janis: that was the first time Janis: 😭 accordingly Jimmy: I will do Janis: hmm Janis: wasn't very believable tbh babe Jimmy: I'll send you the video when I'm on my next break Janis: cool Jimmy: I'll try and look it 💔😎🚬 Janis: it's your whole brand so Jimmy: won't have to try very hard then Janis: 🙌 Jimmy: 🎬🏆🥇 Janis: post you your oscar Jimmy: bring it to the party Jimmy: save yourself the postage Janis: oh yeah Janis: 👍 one Jimmy: full of top quality 💡 me Janis: reason I keep you about Jimmy: duh Jimmy: see you there then Janis: alright Janis: in a bit Jimmy: 😘 Janis: [better skip to this party when you don't come around gal] Jimmy: [such fun] Jimmy: Oi, where am I headed? Jimmy: [after a bit when she has not replied] Jimmy: very helpful, you Jimmy: are we going to this party or what, dickhead? Jimmy: [after another bit] Jimmy: no? alright then Janis: [I'm thinking this is hours later, so the party is over] Janis: had to go somewhere Janis: say I'm at yours if anyone gives a shit Jimmy: tah for telling me when I could have done something to keep us #goals Jimmy: oh hang on, nah, you didn't Janis: sorry Janis: I'm busy Jimmy: me an' all Jimmy: literally always Janis: this is different Jimmy: I don't care Jimmy: I didn't ask Jimmy: it's nowt to do with me, what's to do with me is that you didn't bother to tell me you weren't coming Janis: alright Janis: sorry again Jimmy: now you need me to cover for you, yeah Janis: don't if you can't be bothered Jimmy: I do what I say I'm gonna do Jimmy: you can piss off Janis: yeah well you ain't promised so do what you want Jimmy: I don't need to, it ain't that #deep Jimmy: we have a deal and I pull my weight with it Janis: I'm not wasting battery saying it again Jimmy: you heard me say piss off then Jimmy: on you go Janis: bye, Jimmy Jimmy: 👋 Janis: [that's that on that]

[narekashi]

Smol MCs are great uwu

I can do all the guys but I'll split them apart by army and neutral characters, I hope you don't mind!

Guide to all smol MC headcanons

Red Army | Black Army | Neutral Characters

~~~~~~~

Ray Blackwell

• "I've only known you for one minute but if anyone dares hurt you, I will kill everyone and then myself"

• He absolutely adores your height since he's always surrounded by giants so being around someone so much shorter than him makes him feel so relieved.

• He loves to kiss your forehead since he can bend down easily to kiss it. If he feels like teasing you, he'll ask you if you want a kiss on the lips and if you say yes, he would kiss everywhere besides your lips before asking again.

• He hides you behind his cape when he wants to hide you away from the others. Everyone can obviously see that you're under his cape but he denies with a straight face.

• The easiest way to get out of the Cape Cage is to peek out from the cape and scream help before slowly going back into the cape like you're being dragged by a monster. Do that and Ray will end up bursting with laughter and give you a soft kiss before letting you go.

• Overprotective. I mean, super overprotective. You're so smol that he thinks if a strong wind comes, you'll be blown away with it. Seriously really overprotective.

• Hiding in places with just the two of you is easier though! He likes to give quick kisses hidden in small alleyways while running away from Sirius.

• If someone comments about your height in an unpleasant way, Ray's storming over to your side if he wasn't already there. Most of the time, they run off when they see Ray's face already but just in case they don't, he gives them a piece of his mind in a very very scary tone.

• Don't underestimate Ray.

Sirius Oswald

• Little lady takes on a whole new meaning now.

• He finds you absolutely adorable but the height difference the two of you might overwhelm him in the beginning but after a while, he becomes used to it and thinks up a bunch of ways to make things work between the both of you.

• He'll do anything that is hard for you because of your height since he is probably the tallest person in the entire army. Getting cups on the high shelf? No problem. However sometimes, he'll put things justtt out of reach and ask for a kiss before giving you the thing.

• He finds himself unconsciously petting your head like he does with Chutney. It's just that you're so short and he often times can't even see you if you're standing next to him, so he pats and touches your head as a way to reassure him that you're there.

• Sirius, that bastard. He likes to see you struggle to kiss him when the two of you are standing up. Even when he sits down and you stand up, chances are higher that he's still taller than you. If you somehow manage to surprise him with a kiss, he becomes very surprised before laughing and returning a kiss back.

• His clothes are so long that they can reach until your knees with no problem. He often offers you to wear his shirts or cloak when you're cold or when you have nothing to wear. When he sees you wear his clothes that are oversized on you, he can't help but feel a pang in his heart at how cute you are.

• Nothing is changing how cute he thinks you are. Nothing. Don't even try.

• If someone talks about your height in a unpleasant manner however, he politely tells them to stop and says that height does not define who you really are.

Luka Clemence

• Why are you so tiny??? How are you so tiny??? Did someone steal the calcium in your bones????

• Lots of confusion in his head but 99% of thoughts are thinking about how adorable that small of a height is.

• He likes to touch you but he's often too shy to grab your hand or kiss you so he often pats your head instead and since you're much shorter than him, patting becomes much easier.

• He also loves to cuddle you in his lap. He finds that you're just the right height to put his head on your head and bend down to kiss any part of your face. Also whispers some of "I love you"s while covering his face.

• He thinks that you're a fragile object and won't let you carry any bags or do anything dangerous anywhere. No way is he going to let carry anything he deems too heavy for you, even if it's just a small bag of vegetables. You'll have to ask him to stop before this gets out of hand.

• He can and will carry you every where is possible. If you get an injury or need to be carried somewhere, he won't hesitate to carry you up bridal style. Sometimes, he'll pick you up when you two are going to the bathroom when you get up for your morning routine. It's more fun that way and mornings like that are often filled with laughter.

• If there's someone who commenting badly about your height, he avoids confrontation and leaves the place with you. When you two are alone in a quiet place, he embraces you in his arms, telling you that you're great just the way you are and that you shouldn't listen to what they say to you.

Seth Hyde

• The moment he sees you, he's already in front of you and screaming about how adorable you are, perhaps even hugging you very tightly.

• Very eager to go shopping with you. He wants to see you dressed in a variety of clothes all chosen by him. You're his personal model for the day and he'll treat you back by buying all the clothes that look good on you and some of your favorite desserts or food later on when the two of you are done.

• He also loves to pick you up as a surprise! Any time when you least expect it, he'll pop up out of nowhere and start hugging you after he picks you up into his arms. You're so light to him and he can't help but want to see your surprise face when he gives a surprise hug!

• Also, he'll make sure that everything you need is within of your arm's reach. He'll make sure daily necessities or things you use regularly are always reachable for you. If they aren't, he often leaves a step stool behind so you can reach for it when he isn't there; but he forbids the use of the step stool when he is around because he wants to be the one you rely on the most.

• He's sometimes way too afraid in the same bed as you. He's afraid that he would accidentally crush you under his weight. You're as fragile as glass to him, there's no way he's going to hurt you!

•If someone is commenting something bad about your height, Seth goes full overprotective mode. He scolds them saying that's not a good thing to say to someone and that your height doesn't define who you are. You'll eventually have to stop him before he tries to starts to threaten them.

Fenrir Godspeed

• No matter how tall you are, he doesn't treat you any differently than he already does. Frankly, you being short isn't something that crosses his mind often anyways.

• Even so, he makes sure that he moves things around or change some things so that you can feel comfortable in your room and go as far as to change some things in his room since he knows that you'll be staying over in his room for quite a lot of times now.

• One of the things he likes to do is to pick you up onto his shoulders and start jumping up and down. Some may call this childish but it's great fun to him and he can tell that you like it too.

• He tries to make kisses fun for the both of you. He would ask you to go up 1 or 2 steps before kissing you, getting just the right height for the two of you to be comfortable. Some nights, he likes to lift you up onto tables and kiss you there. Sometimes when he's sitting on a chair while you're standing on, he asks for a kiss from you. There's a large variety of what you two can do.

• Remember when I said he likes to pick you up? Another reason he likes it is because you're in his arms and he can kiss you easily. It's a win win for both of you.

• Sometimes he accidentally puts his arm onto of your head thinking that it was a table. He quickly ruffles your hair pretending like that was what he wanted to do in the first place but his sudden awkward whistling tells other wise.

• If someone is commenting bad about your height, Fenrir isn't taking any of that. He points out that you have many other good points and that your height is perfect as it is. He'll even make a big show of kissing you and telling them how much he loves you.

[mummified-game-review]

Haque: A review

It was funny one summer of anime I was reading this really cute manga about this girl who maxed out her level by killing nothing but slimes, the same time as everyone was getting into that other anime call “that time i was reincarnated as a slime” super weird that these things happened fairly close to each other.

Oh well let's talk about fighting some slimes.

Welcome back to another video here on Mummified games. My name is Tony and today we're going to be taking a look at the RPG Roguelike Haque by Super Try.

This is another one of these roguelikes where you are asked to pick one of three characters to go run though these dungeons. And try to get as far as you can.

The game has a heavy retro feel to it. And I mean heavy retro as in they let you turn on CRT scan lines and a faux dirty screen to make it feel super rough and hard to see...

Ah yes the anarcho-retro style. So in love with old graphics that were going to actively make the experience as basic as possible on your nice clean 1080p monitors and TVs. The chaotic Evil of game graphics.

Luckily if you don't want to play with dust and crap all over your screen, then grab some monitor cleaner

And if you don't want the fake dirt in the game then you can turn it all off along with the CRT scanlines. Doing this will make it all crisp clean sharp pixels.

Anyway moving on from that small personal setting.

The game starts when you first load it up asking you to impot the date. But no matter what you type it does the right date. And that was cool when it happened. You can just press the same key over and over again to progress though this intro but it might also be fun to just pretend you're inputting these commands.

I don't have any video of this because I started playing the game and forgot to hit the record button on OBS. So yeah. Sorry.

So once you’re in I highly recommend you play the tutorial and figure out what everything means. The symbols and art that exist in this game are fine. And once you know what they stand for it makes sense, but just jumping right into the game can be a little deep.

The controls are fairly simple, similar to the controls of a game that I reviewed earlier called Midboxx where you can click around your character, selecting the squares around them and moving to the next squares. And also attacking this way.

Hitting “I” will bring up your inventory and you can also see what you have equipped. Similar to all the other RPGs that are out there.

All the actions you can do are bound to 1 through 4 and also Q W E R at the top left of the keyboard. Compared to ability buttons in some MOBA or MMO games.

QWER being reserved for special skills that your equipped items give you. And then there are 1 through 4 that are quick locations for consumable items. Examples being positions and other limited uses items.

There is a companion that comes with you that fights the monsters you might see in the dungeons.

But that's sort of the basics. There are tons of skills and items that you could use in the game that you could just hold right click over and they explain the spell.

Once you get out of the tutorial the actual game starts with you picking one of 3 different random skilled and stats characters at the start. They’re nowhere near your typical archetypal characters, sometimes you can get a sorcerer that is a great fighter. Sometimes you can get a Necromancer Mushroom that spews spores everywhere. And then there sometimes is a werewolf that you can play as, also.

It's hard to tell you about this game because there isn't a lot that sets it apart from other Roguelikes there are.

The music is fairly basic, and now that I stopped playing the game I could not tell you what any of it sounded like. I know there was a sort of chime sounding song that would play in the shops and that was different from the other songs.

Oh there is a fun idea they put into the shop mechanic.

There's no money or currency in this game. So the shopping experience is a barter deal. Where you select the item you want to buy and then select the items you would want to trade for it. And the game gives you a percentage of if that deal would go through or not. That's actually interesting.

Especially since the chance of the trade going through is the same window in the game where they show you the likelihood of the attack you're about to do will land or not. So that's fun.

There's a sight range thing... *sigh*

There is just nothing to really talk about in this one. It's all just more dungeon crawling fighting more enemies.

There is a story going on with the program being corrupted. And there is an old man that I was halfway through level 3 or 4 when I was thinking okay when is he going to turn on me? And turns out to be a bad guy.

Idk why i thought that might happen but after beating the level one skeleton boss he said something to me that i thought was super ominous. All while the screen was glitching out a bit. Very weird.

Having played this for about an hour and a half I didn't get really far into the story part of this Roguelike. Again a fault of the genre. Your story can't be super long or hard to reach if the player is going to die over and over again.

While playing this game I found myself taking into account the same fighting style that I adopted in Crypt of the Necrodancer. Where if the monster i'm fighting is about to attack i just move back one and they have to spend their turn to move forward.

The problem with this strategy is that the game does not clearly show you how long it is until the other character will take their turn. So you might move back one and then it turns out you have more time until they do their thing.

I feel like this one is going to be the same thing I say about most of the games that came in the Racial Justice Bundle. If you bought that bundle then sure go play this game since you have it. Go find it in your collection and give it a whirl.

But as for a recommendation to go out and pick it up. I'd say unless you really need that crunchy pixel roguelike RPG in your life then sure. If not then I'd give this a pass.

If you played this game, what were your thoughts on it?

If you haven't played this game, are there any other aggressively retro games out there that you would want me to try. Let me know in the comments.

IN THE MEANTIME!

I just remembered I never did a Tournament update at the end of July. I think that since i didn't do a full month i'm going to wait till the end of August. That way I have a bunch to filter though. Not as much as the first one obviously but still a good chunk to push forward with.

I'm sure ill get to another tool or book review soon if anyone was looking for more of those. I'm giving myself a little bit of time every day to read though some of the actual books in this bundle. The next Book club might not be a bundle but a full book by its self. Obviously i'll keep you informed.

But for now you all do the youtube dance Like, Sub, Bell, Comment, share with someone you know.

And as always friends, keep digging and we’ll make it out sometime

See you in the next one.

[ty-menace-blog]

⤷ title: 12:04

⤷ featuring: taeyong (nct) x reader

⤷ rating: purely soft

a/n: i thought about this after watching one of his studio lives, and knowing the credit he just doesn’t often receive for being such a hardworking, and incredible artist, i felt it was my duty to write deeper into that, but pls enjoy !

⤷ summary: late night studio talk.

»»————-　♔　————-««

It was late.

A million things were on your mind. You were completely distracted. You thought about how you could never be on time for anything. Not even for your best friend's midnight crisis. To tell the truth, he never actually slept at normal times, so he liked to call you up late at night to have someone to talk to and be around. It was fine. Sometimes you weren't able to fall asleep so it was nice to be bothered. You were always his first choice. Always the one he called up at random times either to just chat or come hang out. That was nice too.

As you walked along the streets of seoul, you noticed the first drop of snow that began to fall. You stopped, and craned your neck up to look at the sky. It was dark, but you could see each and every snowflake that fell, one landing at the tip of your nose. With a crinkle, it dissipated into water, and made your nose tingle.

You took a peek at the time on your watch. It was past midnight. A sigh left your cold lips. You knew that if you didn't hurry, he would send about a billion messages wondering where you were or whether you got lost again. It was his way of worrying about you.

You smiled. He liked to be motherly. It was annoying, yet cute at the same time. You didn't mind it. Not at all.

The further you got down the street, the more you realized that it really was late out. You only came across two other people that were out, and they looked to be in a hurry (unlike you). Perhaps because of the cold. Either way, it made you pick up the pace to avoid the texts that you were sentenced to get if you didn't get there quickly enough.

When you got there, it surprised you that he hadn't sent not one message considering you were about fifteen minutes late. Perhaps he was busy. That was what you assumed, anyway.

Upon opening the door to the building, the immediate warmth you felt washed over your body while the smell of freshly brewed coffee crept its way into your senses. With a soft smile, you let your feet carry you the rest of the way mindlessly. Soon enough, you were in front of the studio, two drinks from starbucks in hand. One, an iced caramel frappicino, the other a strawberry açaí with coconut milk. One of his favorite drinks. You could say he liked anything pink.

Before you were able to knock on the door, it swung open, surprising you.

Taeyong never cared about what he wore late at night when going to the studio unless he planned on doing a vlive so, there he was dressed down in dark grey sweatpants, a plain white long sleeved shirt and a pair of shoes he'd recently artworked on. The shirt looked a size too big for him, but he looked cozy. Whenever he wore clothes bigger than him, it always made him look so tiny. You remembered a few weeks back how he came over to your place wearing the largest hoodie you’d ever seen on him, baggy sweatpants and a pair of converse with the laces untied. It made him look several sizes smaller, and five years younger. He ended up being the little spoon that night. As if you minded. The body heat he radiated all night was worth it. Especially after a point during the night he ended up turning around to wrap all of his limbs around your entire body resulting to you waking up sweaty the next morning. It was still worth it, somehow. Maybe it was the redness in his cheeks, an eyebrow twitching after every other breath, and the way he’d grip onto you at the slightest of movement from you. The moment he mumbled, “stay”, was when you melted in his long arms, and fell right back to sleep despite the overwhelming heat.

So, okay, it was maybe definitely worth it.

Taeyong stood in front of you, an arm holding the door open, wearing a cheeky smile. He looked adorable. You wanted to pinch his cheek but refrained due to still holding the drinks, and knowing he would whine and protest about it even though he liked when you did it. Such a baby.

"Oh! You finally made it, huh?" Taeyong commented, his eyes instantly dropping from yours onto the pink drink you held in your hand. "Let me guess: you're late because you went and got yourself two drinks." He shook his head. "Cruel. I fell asleep waiting for you, and you go and- wow, so cruel,” he said with a cute pout.

So dramatic, you thought to yourself as you fought back an amusing smile, and handed him the drink.

"Don't tempt me or I might actually keep it," you taunted as he took it. You took a sip of your coffee, and grunted with a gesture at him to let you in. He stepped aside, and you walked into the small space that felt like a cozy, warm home.

There was a small candle near the door that made the room smell like tonka bean and jasmine. A modern floral earthy melange. It made the room feel comfortable. He always knew how to make a space his home. Particularly, the studio, considering he stayed in it for majority of his free time. He liked it. He called it his Creative Space. You found him to be ridiculously adorable sometimes. Maybe it was the names he gave things or more specifically the way he said them. Either way, it was cute, and you never missed a chance to tease him about it every single time he came up with one.

You hummed as you sat down in the chair next to his, and looked over what he had previously been doing.

"Any progress?" You asked, as you drummed your fingertips against the paper cup.

You knew that he had been working on a new song he was wanting to use for the comeback that was coming up for 127, but this particular song was a bit more difficult than, perhaps, any song he'd ever written. He tried to explain to you what the concept of the album was going to be about, but you never could understand it. You just knew that he had been having quite a hard time with it. It was pressuring, you knew that as well. It worried you how much of his time he had to spend to work on it. He hardly got any rest because of it, but he always reassured you that he didn't mind the hours of sleep he didn't usually get. Being an artist wasn't a job to him. It was a gift.

Back then, he didn't know how special he was, or what his talents were, but ever since then, he'd been grateful for the opportunity. He felt important. Like he had a purpose. When things got difficult, he liked to remember what he had to go through to get to where he was. Though, it seemed like this time was different.

Taeyong was sipping on his drink as his eyes roamed over the lyrics he was working on. You could practically see the wheels turning in his head. He looked conflicted.

He squinted, set the drink aside, and sighed. "I get so...caught up in myself sometimes, you know? I think to myself, am what I'm doing...is it enough? There are moments where I know what I want to do, like I'll have the exact vision in my mind but there are times like these where I question myself. Do people actually like what I put out? Or are they just being supportive because I'm me..”

Even from the side, you could see the astray glint in his eyes. You pushed your coffee off to the side, and moved closer to him. He turned to you slowly, looking anywhere but at you. You could see it. He felt ashamed to be so lost. You knew he didn't like to show that side of him. He was a vulnerable person, but also prideful. He only wanted you to see the best sides of him. Not the sides of him that sometimes felt like a thin paper in the wind going nowhere. He liked it when you were proud of him. He just didn't know that you always were, no matter what he did. In your eyes, he was phenomenal in every possible aspect. You were more than proud. You were thankful to be his friend. To know what it was like to see him on his tired days, his happy days, and even his sad days. You felt lucky.

"Taeyong.." You reached out a hand to put over his fumbling ones. "You're brilliant at what you do. Not many people can even do what you do on a daily basis. You lose sleep over all of this. That's dedication. That's having absolute love for what you do. There are always going to be a collective set of people that won't like what you put out either because it ends up not being their taste or simply because they may not like you personally for whatever the reason, but those aren't your audience. You don't have to worry about those people. Your fans? Those that actually appreciate what you do, and love it? They're your only audience. That's your aim. Also," you smiled. "-it's okay to get stuck sometimes. Book authors get writer's block all the time. They stop for about two weeks, then come right back at it again. You're not a superhero, Taeyong. You're human. You can't always do it all. I know you want to, but you simply can’t. Just know that I’m very proud of you for what you’ve done thus far. I really am.”

Taeyong sat there, looked in your eyes, and soaked up every word. His heart could've exploded right then and there. He loved that about you. Your utter support for him was more than enough to always get him right back on track. He appreciated you so much for it. He was grateful to have you in his life, even if he had a bit of trouble saying it. It made him happy to just know that you would always be there for him no matter what. You, his constant. He couldn't have felt any luckier.

"Thank you," he said softly, and took your hands in his, squeezing them gently. "I mean it, thank you for that. You always know what to say."

Your heart felt warm. If only he knew how you truly felt about him. Why you always got so defensive when it came to him doubting himself or worrying about whether people actually liked him. You wanted to tell him that none of that mattered above how you felt. That you’d always be there to support him.

It was hard to continue as if you only saw him as a friend. He made it so hard sometimes. A kiss to the cheek here, and hugs that lasted way too long. There would be moments where you’d ramble on and on about something, but caught him staring at your lips the entire time. As if he hadn’t listened to a word that you had said. Moments like he wanted to know what you’d do if he kissed you right then. Taeyong was quite easy to read. Especially for you. He was never able to hide anything from you. You could catch on easily.

You wondered when you would get the courage to tell him how you felt. Where your true feelings lain. His possible reaction to your confession still scared you enough to hold back, and resist telling him. To lose the friendship you two had, that scared you enough to want to never truly tell him how you felt.

“Ah, so,” Taeyong began as he turned back to screen in front of him. “I think I could use your input on some lyrics here. If they’re good enough, I might actually add them.” He gave you a wink. You couldn’t help but giggle as you drew closer to see the screen as well.

“What? Will I get credited on the album as well if my input happens to be good enough?” You asked, teasingly.

Taeyong shrugged, smiling. “Possibly. Wanna find out?”

You rose a curious eyebrow. “How can I say no to you?”

He laughed before smirking. “Easy. Just say n...n...oooo,” he taunted playfully as you slapped his arm, shaking your head.

There was no way that you could’ve thrown everything between you two away. What you two had was comfortable, and settling. You liked things the way that they were. You definitely could hold onto that confession a little longer.

[thethirteencreators-blog]

Chapter 6.5

"The idiot still isn't answering his phone? Is he working late or something?"

This would be such a simple answer and I wish I could just smile and say, "Sure! That is exactly what's keeping him!" However, I know that this is a lie and I have never been good at lying. I twitch when I lie, my lips betray me and form the most devious grin, and my voice sweetens itself to the point of me sounding like a cartoon character from the sixties. "No, he isn't working late. I walked by the café. It's closed, everyone is gone," I explain to Lyric, slapping my hand onto my knee to keep my leg from shaking. My friend purses his lips, a sign that he was either really irritated or really confused. (Good chance of it being both.) The two of us were in his studio apartment, plopped down on his couch, staring blankly at the muted television in the middle of the room. I came to Lyric's place about five minutes ago and caught him in the middle of watching the movie adaptation Hairspray for the thirtieth time. He invited me in and offered me a pop, but I declined. Caffeine was not what I needed right now. I was already jittery enough. Lyric lifts up his arms in a thoughtful gesture. "Have you tried calling his coworker?" I throw him a pointed look. "Why would I have Jasmine's phone number?" It's ridiculous for him to even assume I would have it. "I don't know. She's cute." Is he joking? I can't tell if he's joking. "Not my type. Or yours, I thought." I throw him a questioning look. Lyric chuckles, taking a sip out of a cherry colored bottle of pop. "Hey, I'm pretty open minded." In all the time I've known Lyric, he has not once actually showed any interest in another human being. When I say this, I don't mean he doesn't have romantic feelings for anyone. I mean he literally finds people the most boring beings on the planet, which is why I believe he enjoys acting so much. Up on stage, he isn't surrounded by people anymore, he says, but actors. Actors are not just people in his eyes. What they are is something so much larger with so many different layers to them. Actors are the only people he can discover any intrigue in. "Anyways," I huff, changing the subject back to a more pressing matter than Lyric's so-called open mindedness, "if Jimmy calls or shows up or you see him somewhere for some reason, tell me please? That way I will know he didn't get stabbed thirty-seven times in the chest or hit by a bus." "Why is it always a bus with you? Why can't people be hit by cars anymore?" Lyric points out, getting up from his sitting position and following me towards the front door. I stand there for a second, trying very hard to let my worry go and laugh along with him. "Jimmy is too sly to get hit by a car. If he's gonna be crushed, it'll have to be something huge," I reason, rubbing my lips together. They are so dry. When I see Jimmy, I'm gonna kick his butt for taking my lip balm. My friend reaches around my body and unlocks the door for me. "Jimmy is probably fine," Lyric assures me, his hand on my shoulder. He gives me a tight squeeze, an odd show of affection from the man who hates physical contact. I have to pause when he does this and stare, which he returns with a small smile. Lyric's smiles are so rare. He knows how much I love them. "Don't get all paranoid, man. Knowing that loser, he's probably in the drama room having dinner with his mama." "Why does having dinner with his mom make him a loser? His mom is really cool," I point out. I've never understood why kids are so anti-parent. Yes, my parents weren't perfect and spent eighty percent of their time nagging at me, but I never felt a need to shove them away. I was never ashamed of them, even if they might have been ashamed of me. During the period of time after I came out as pan to them and the day I announced I wanted to go to Broadway, they seemed a little iffy on how they felt about me. We cleared it up, though, and they went back to loving me unconditionally after the initial shock wore off. A group of blonde girls stroll by in matching purple dresses, trilling about some band they were going to see live. One of them, apparently, won free tickets off the radio and another splurged to get them a limo. Kudos for them. "His moms are pretty chill," Lyric agrees, setting his hip against the doorframe. "I'll see you tomorrow for rehearsal before class, Alto. If I receive any contact from the alien life force we know as Jimmy John, I'll let you know." "You are so weird," I laugh, listening to the sound of the door clicking shut behind me.

------*

The dorm is in an oddly tranquil state when I return home sometime around midnight. Even though Lyric instructed that I don't let paranoia overcome me, I couldn't help but wander the school grounds for a few hours. I even walked all the way to Jimmy's favorite restaurant about a mile away from the school. Sometimes he goes there in the middle of the night to get some cheap noodles. That actually has become his routine during finals. Patricia, the owner, loves him for all the business he brings her. I even went as far as to actually call his mother when all else failed. She told me that she saw him at around three and hadn't heard from him since. To avoid freaking her out, I assured her he was probably just practicing somewhere secluded, wanting privacy. There's no sign of Jimmy anywhere. No call, no text, no email... Absolutely nothing. Something happened, I know it. I can feel it in my stomach every single time I think about him; this overwhelming, aching dread repeatedly splashes over me like a bucket of blood. Wherever Jimmy is, he isn't safe. I'm almost up the first flight of stairs when I consider calling the police. This might be nothing, but I refuse to take a chance. If Jimmy really is in trouble and I did nothing to help him, I will never be able to forgive myself. "Hey, Alto!" I hear someone call. I look up and find the sweet smile of Edda waiting for me. She is worn down and borderline weak looking, but still manages to be the brightest star in the room. "You were out late." I wave her off. "Hi, Edda. I was out looking for Jimmy," I explain, playing it off as if this were nothing. There is no reason to worry anybody else. "What were you doing? Partying?" "Yikes, me?" she chuckles, slapping her hand to her chest. Edda has lived down the hall from Jimmy and I since she started here last year. The two of us have a minor friendship made up of mostly childish banter and musical references. Also, she is one of the only people who does not look ready to barf when I make a terribly wonderful pun. (For example, H-2-Oh No! When I used this on my neighbor, Madison, she looked ready to slam my head in her door. Would I have blamed her? Probably not.) It's nice having a friend who doesn't treat me like the freak I know I am. I appreciate her more than I appreciate Jimmy sometimes and that is saying mounds about our simple contact. Edda pauses on the stairs before me and gestures to the tag on her shirt. "My staff kind of bailed last minute at the paper, so I'm pretty much on my own. I just needed to run back here and pick up some photographs I forgot for the front page." Ever since the beginning of the year, Edda has been the head of our school's newspaper. She is the one who compiles it all together, writes editorials, finds leads for her team of three (counting the resident cartoonist, Kam) to follow, prints everything out, and sets up the newspaper stand in the main hall. "That sucks," I say. "It keeps me busy," Edda shrugs, adjusting a strap over her arm. "Well, I best get going. Nice seeing you, Alto." "You too," I nod, watching her descend the stairs and exit through the side door. Just as I reach into my pocket, I feel my phone start to buzz. Finally, Jimmy has messaged! I pull out my device and see his name printed across the screen. Thank god, Jimmy! I hit answer and let out a breathe of relief. "Jim-Jam, you scared me to death! Where have you..." "Heads up!" the phone cackles and I'm propelled forwards. The stairs thud beneath me with each roll until I'm at the bottom, my body trembling with pain. I lift my hands and cradle my head, attempting to recollect myself. My phone lies beside me in about three different parts. For that to have happened, the fall must have been pretty intense. "Why?" I choke out, lifting my head. The attacker is nowhere to be seen. "W-where'd you go?" I try to get up but my body refuses. Every one of my limbs feels ten times its size. I can't even move my left leg. Did I break it? Could I have broken it after only falling down half a flight of stairs? A horrible thought strikes me quite suddenly and I feel bile in my throat. What if I was right and Jimmy was hurt? Maybe the same person who did this to him is doing this to me. My shoulder stings. There's something pricking it. Before I can look, what I assume is a bag is thrown over my head. I'm engulfed in darkness for a few seconds. I don't fight it. I lay there and wait for it take me away.

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Jimmy

Janis: Back in time? Jimmy: he ain't even back yet Jimmy: I'm fucked off beyond belief Janis: 'Course he ain't Janis: 😑 Jimmy: good thing I am 'cause there weren't nowt for Cass to make for tea but don't worry dad Janis: What a prick Janis: so little satisfaction in sorting it and being the perfect son when he's not even gonna be sorry/care Jimmy: least I can win big brother points Janis: 👍 Janis: What really counts tbh Jimmy: I've sent her for chips and whatever else she can get her grubbies on so 🥇 Jimmy: what you doing? Janis: Nice one Janis: Not a whole lot, still chilling down in the barn 'cos know I'll have to chat to someone about some irrelevant shit if I go in Jimmy: it is decent in there but it's shit that you aren't here Jimmy: 'cause you could be & that's what pisses me off Janis: I know, wish I was Janis: could go for some chips right now, like Jimmy: get a lift? Jimmy: your massive family gotta have some uses Janis: 😏 Not totally about the chips, babe Janis: am hungry though Jimmy: I'll get you different food if it's a dealbreaker Jimmy: you know you wanna watch a 12 & 6 year old fight over the remote Jimmy: like they ain't been inside all day Janis: Bless 'em Janis: Better than having to watch a 15 & 16 year old though like, go in a different room you privileged fucks, you really need the 'big' TV #exposed #thankslads Jimmy: 🙄 Jimmy: I'm gonna have to take 'em to the park or whatever tomorrow 'cause it's bollocks Jimmy: that's your invite Jimmy: help me milk my sickie Jimmy: fuck knows when I'll get a full day off again Janis: Sure, long as my lady love's got hers too, like Jimmy: she won't leave me alone so yeah Jimmy: must smell like you or summat Janis: 😍 Janis: least she weren't there to watch, she woulda defs gone for you #nohope Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: the audience you really want Janis: nah, get enough of that with the cats lurking like creepy fucks Jimmy: if you noticed them hanging 'bout then 💔 'cause I was clearly shit at keeping your attention Jimmy: gutted Janis: I didn't Janis: You know you weren't Jimmy: I know you weren't Janis: 😳 Jimmy: think of somewhere you wanna go tomorrow, yeah? Jimmy: fun shit Jimmy: even if it ain't #goals Janis: I'll think on Janis: What kinda shit are the kiddos about? Jimmy: whinging Jimmy: nah but for real Cass is into all kinds of shit as long as it ain't the kind of shit your sister likes Jimmy: easy pickings for you there Janis: What about Malahide? they've got the castle and all that but if that ain't up to scratch, day at the beach Janis: even I wouldn't complain, like Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: that's actually a really decent idea Jimmy: I should have enough money for the train knocking 'bout Janis: If you like, I can cadge a life from one of my not-as-shit siblings, literally quadruple the time on the train, which is alright if we gotta but if we don't, result Jimmy: I wouldn't complain Jimmy: the dog'll be enough of a nightmare as is Janis: Poor baby Janis: she can sit on my lap Jimmy: if you sit on mine she ain't Jimmy: not her fault she's never been nowhere though Janis: firstly 😍 Janis: secondly, it don't matter if she's badly behave, my brother will take us in his hippie van so she can walk about more Janis: hopefully the kids don't get a contact high like soz but it'll chill 'em out so 🤷 Jimmy: least he won't be a brother I have to worry about fighting me then Janis: 😂 God no Janis: none of my brothers are harder than me and that's that on that Janis: he might chat to you on some weird shit you have no interest in but that's about your lot, it'll be fine Jimmy: firstly 😍 & secondly also 😍😍 Jimmy: stop being hot & not here it's a bit rude Janis: I know, right? Janis: Take it up with your Dad tbh but don't 'cos bigger sins and 🖕 Jimmy: any chance your brother can also bring you here now? Janis: So Igs, I have a dick appointment... Janis: 😏 Jimmy: if he's chill he's chill, yeah Jimmy: don't make the rules Janis: If you want me DOA 'cos shame 😳 Jimmy: You won't remember it in a bit Janis: So tempting Jimmy: so be tempted Jimmy: go on Janis: You just left Janis: but I've not stopped thinking about you Jimmy: alright then come back Jimmy: I'm thinking about you right now Janis: Fuck...okay but I can fully hide in your room if your Dad comes back, yeah? Jimmy: fuck him Jimmy: he don't matter Janis: I don't wanna get you in trouble though, actual trouble Jimmy: you won't Jimmy: if he wants to start shit that's him Janis: Okay, coming over Janis: track someone down to tell I'm still alive, like Jimmy: 👌 Jimmy: I need to shower do you want me to wait for you so we can do it together? Janis: Wait Janis: I want that Jimmy: doing my bit for the water bill Jimmy: my dad can't say shit Janis: Definitely start your argument there, babe Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: tah Jimmy: don't wanna talk to him but if I gotta Janis: Well he's the one that fucked up today so what's he gonna say really Jimmy: 🙄 loads probably Janis: 😒 Janis: I'm gonna distract you though Jimmy: you'll get through the door see the 🐶 and only have eyes for her Janis: I mean, she is pretty demanding but nah Janis: you got my full attention right now Jimmy: 💕 Jimmy: I want it Janis: Thank fuck Janis: be awkward if you didn't now Jimmy: I did reckon that maybe I'd get it out of my system and be like Janet who? but Jimmy: I weren't ready to go yet Janis: 😑 Janis: Got a day or so left in us then you reckon? Jimmy: 🤞 Jimmy: if you don't take me somewhere shit tomorrow I'll give you another day, only fair Janis: 👍 oh tah Janis: dickhead 😏 Jimmy: for real though, it made me want you more Jimmy: that's weird, isn't it? Janis: is it? Jimmy: I didn't reckon I could Jimmy: but you were just Janis: I'm glad I didn't disappoint Janis: 'cos I want more of you too Jimmy: piss off would you Jimmy: not to be all 😍 but 😍 Janis: 💪 Janis: 'course not Jimmy: You know what you were & it weren't disappointing Janis: You're cute Jimmy: alright shut up Janis: Nah Janis: gonna have to wait and make me cutie Jimmy: you're gonna make me 😳 Jimmy: stop Janis: 🤤 Jimmy: how long can I let my sister be out getting food before I reckon she's been snatched? asking for a friend Janis: I think you've got a while yet Janis: I'll let you know when you can worry Janis: got her phone, yeah? Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: glued to it more than we are Janis: practically born with one these days Jimmy: can't blame her she had loads of mates back home Janis: yeah, must miss them loads Janis: least it ain't too hard to get back, when she's a bit older, like Jimmy: fuck knows where any of us will be this time next week the way my dad carries on Jimmy: he's gotta be with someone right now 'cause he ain't here Janis: true Janis: most likely, coulda at the literal least text Jimmy: I know he ain't got loads of mates Jimmy: must be busy, don't wanna think about it 'cause how ungoals Jimmy: what's the opposite of 😍 Janis: 🤢 Janis: Basically Janis: doesn't put me in the mood either don't worry Jimmy: I take back what I said before, that's the hottest thing you've ever said to me 💕 Jimmy: save me from the repeated history Janis: 😂 Janis: I can tell you all about how unattractive I find him if that works, easy Jimmy: don't think 'bout him if it's such a turn off, only gives me more work to do Janis: Don't be a slacker, babe 😏 Jimmy: never even faked it Janis: 💪 Jimmy: 🥇 Janis: I'll allow it Janis: I felt it Jimmy: I still feel it Jimmy: you Janis: You're killing me Jimmy: I don't wanna make it weird but Janis: ? Jimmy: I don't know just Jimmy: it's not been like that for me before Jimmy: all the 'shade' to my ex maybe Janis: I feel it too Janis: so not weird, just us usual at this point Jimmy: I really can't stop thinking about you, I know I already said it Janis: I know, I seriously can't Janis: and like Janis: give a shit about judgment that ain't why I'm saying it Janis: but I don't do things like this, this quick, usually, you know but I just Janis: wanted to so bad Jimmy: I get it Jimmy: me either, for all my chat Janis: Yeah? Janis: makes me feel better, like, it was happening regardless but I was a bit worried you'd notice Jimmy: there have been other girls, scattered about but I've only had the one girlfriend Jimmy: & you know how that went Janis: Yeah Janis: can't help being so youthful Jimmy: & we were mates first for ages it wasn't like this Janis: Makes sense Janis: I'm a casual billy no mates as well all know though so 🤷 Jimmy: me too Jimmy: we did try and be mates after but it never quite happened Jimmy: Barry's #influence Janis: Jealous type? Jimmy: not that simple but let's say it is Janis: Fair enough Jimmy: there was just a lot of shit happening & not Jimmy: for all of us Jimmy: how fucking cryptic, am I a paddy now or what? Janis: 🍀 getting so acclimatized babe Janis: but seriously, you don't owe me nothing if you don't wanna talk on shit, it's cool Jimmy: I know Jimmy: You're just Jimmy: easy to talk to? or I like it whatever Janis: I like talking to you and all Janis: I know I don't say loads (or do I? #chatty) but I barely talk to my own fam never mind anyone else so believe me like Janis: you're honoured, is what I'm saying Jimmy: can't get a word in, can you? Jimmy: I'm that dickhead Jimmy: I don't know it's like rule 1 of this new roof is there was no before & alright but Jimmy: there was Janis: Nah, if you were you'd be too much like my Sister and there's no way I'd have even fake kissed you never mind really fucked you Janis: sometimes you wanna talk about that shit Janis: it don't always stay before, good or bad Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻🎻 like Jimmy: I'm shutting up now Jimmy: Take a turn, girl Janis: You don't have to but alright Janis: what you wanna know Jimmy: only what you wanna tell me Jimmy: I'm not here to dig Janis: hmm Janis: okay Janis: don't be weird, yeah, usual rules Jimmy: 👌 Janis: It's weird because I didn't want to tell anyone about it or talk about it before but now it's happened I kinda do but also, there's still no one I would wanna but you really so Janis: that was my first time, like, proper sex Jimmy: well now I'm glad I didn't disappoint Jimmy: shit Jimmy: I'd have never have reckoned that Janis: That was the plan Janis: to not let on, not 'cos I don't trust you or nothing but idk, why make it a big deal but Janis: there you go Jimmy: you could've told me Jimmy: I probably wouldn't do anything different 'cause you know Jimmy: but I don't know, I'm just saying, you can tell me shit from now on if you want Janis: I don't know, people get in your head about that shit, don't they, like everyone says first times are crap but if you didn't know then you wouldn't be different and it didn't have to be Janis: and it really weren't Janis: so, thanks, yeah? 😉 Jimmy: Goddamn it, Jillian, stop trying to make me fall in love with you Jimmy: how do you take your first time at anything and just fucking 🥇 Jimmy: bit rude Janis: You ain't mad about it Janis: team, remember Jimmy: I'm like in #awe Janis: Shh 😌 Jimmy: sort of wish I could tell everyone so I could big you up how you deserve Jimmy: won't though Janis: People reckon they know anyway 'cos obviously if some dickhead from School ain't bragging about swiping my Vs to everyone it couldn't have happened Janis: dunno how #goals everyone would rate that but I appreciate Jimmy: 🙄🙄 Jimmy: it'd get twisted so like I said, I won't but 🥇 seriously Janis: 😍 Jimmy: how far away are you? Janis: Under 10 minutes Jimmy: Cass is back, I'll fight her for your share of food Jimmy: what could be more #goals Jimmy: get a boyfriend who'd smack down a 12 year old girl he's related to for you Janis: 😂 Janis: My hero, truly Jimmy: I don't even know how you like your chips Jimmy: probably some weird way Janis: Lemme guess, gravy Jimmy: say something snide, you can't Jimmy: it's good Janis: 😏 just that you're an absolute stereotype Janis: but I seriously ain't fussy, when you've got a Dad who insists on doing needlessly fancy shit to everything, it's good to just have some straight up junk Jimmy: peas are good too Jimmy: there's loads of shit here anyway Jimmy: remind me not to give my sister money again Janis: 💸💸💸 Janis: I'll try it your way, impress me, boy Jimmy: if I don't with the food, I'll do it after Janis: You better Jimmy: have I been all chat even once? nah Janis: that's why I like you Janis: no bullshit Jimmy: so you can believe me when I say shit first time is a myth but it does get better the more you do it Janis: I will, even if that sounds like a ploy to get me to fuck you more Janis: not mad Jimmy: maybe it is Jimmy: a bit Jimmy: but I still think we can make it true too Janis: 'course we can Janis: as long as I wasn't awful, hence I had to check before or you'd feel like you had to be nice, like Jimmy: don't sound like me Jimmy: you got the right boy? Janis: If I ain't don't tell him Janis: you sound hot Jimmy: [sends selfie] I am Jimmy: you have kissed lads before though? you're not gonna tell me that you just smashed that 🥇 too, are you? Janis: DAMN Janis: better make that my phone background asap 'cos #boydonegood Janis: nah, I've kissed lads Janis: not loads and like I said, it sucked every time but Jimmy: thank feck for that Jimmy: not that it sucked but they exist Janis: Why? Janis: Can't deal with me being THAT good? 😏 Jimmy: nah I can't Janis: 😂 Janis: I'm glad I had though or I might not have agreed to our deal Janis: I felt nothing but I knew they liked it, so it'd be alright Jimmy: did they ALL fall for you or just me? Janis: One of them unlikely as he's a massive prick who's rode every girl in his School and most at ours Janis: then the other was a kid in Brazil because we always go back to where my Dad's fam is from so I saw him a lot when we used to go back more Janis: maybe but you know, years ago now Jimmy: he so did Jimmy: just thinking about kissing you Jimmy: you know what it makes me feel like Janis: Tell me though Jimmy: I don't even know how to Jimmy: it just sounds like bollocks but its not Janis: I believe you Jimmy: I wish we could stay in all day tomorrow Jimmy: but I can't be that dickhead Janis: We've got time Janis: however long we wanna Janis: not going anywhere yet Jimmy: I believe you Janis: Good Janis: You're making this holiday bearable, hell, this fucking town right now Jimmy: I don't have to say likewise Jimmy: even before when it was meant to be only fake bearable Janis: Yeah Janis: You're just better than everyone else here, that's facts regardlesss of what we're doing Janis: I should've found that out sooner but whatever Jimmy: like you said, we've got time Jimmy: when you get here stay outside for a bit, I know it's probably gonna piss down but I want Jimmy: I wanna just be alone without kids and fucking dogs & dads that might appear or not whenever Janis: Okay Janis: I want that too Janis: we're showering anyway Jimmy: & I'll keep your chips warm for you, I'm not an animal Janis: 💕 Jimmy: gimme a phone background Janis: [Cute selfie which we should defs find for each other 'cos yas] Jimmy: 👌 now I really wanna be alone Jimmy: so what you've just been walking around looking like that? bit rude Janis: Who do I think I am, honestly? Janis: Getting off the bus though, if you see me, don't let me go to the wrong house for a laugh, tah Jimmy: Hang on, what's your name again, Jasmine Canvas? summat like that Janis: 🙄 you wish, art hoe Jimmy: me? yeah alright Jimmy: you & your flair Janis: I won't apologise for being #inspired Janis: get you some concealer from gracie if CG gets mad about it Jimmy: I won't say soz for how much I've touched it since Jimmy: or cover it up for them dickheads Jimmy: what did you say before? Can't censor #art Janis: When it fades I'll give you another one Janis: so you remember just how much I want you Jimmy: I'm not gonna let myself forget Jimmy: or you Janis: I don't plan on letting you either Janis: but giving you one every time we screw might be a bit excessive Janis: don't wanna leave you that sore, poor boy Jimmy: just cover me tonight it's not gonna be topless weather at the beach even if I am that northern Janis: How can I refuse such an offer? 😍 Jimmy: you can't Jimmy: but I don't want you to Jimmy: I just want you until we have to crash Janis: Give me some too? Janis: I like them Jimmy: how can I refuse? not gonna Janis: You're fun Janis: and hot Janis: I really really like fucking with you Jimmy: 😳 Jimmy: it was fun that really got me Jimmy: fuck knows when I was last called that Janis: You are Janis: people are idiots Jimmy: we're both dickheads Jimmy: & I like you Janis: Backatcha Janis: See yours, come out and kiss me please Jimmy: I was about to ask where the fuck you were Janis: Shut up, I didn't get lost or nothing, you kept distracting me, as per Jimmy: you shut up, saying please when you know it kills me Janis: 😈 Jimmy: how do you look so Jimmy: who looks good in the rain? piss off Janis: 😏 and people reckon i'm unbearable now, keep giving me compliments imma be so bad Jimmy: Nah? I'm so mad at you Jimmy: Can't you tell Janis: 😞 Janis: can't you see this pout Jimmy: [kisses her by biting the pouty lip and pulling it in 'cause how dare she be so cute bye] Janis: [Makes noises 'cos gotta be quieter inside and also damn boy] Janis: still mad? Jimmy: Maybe Janis: Do what you gotta do 'til you ain't, I'm ready Janis: challenge accepted Jimmy: [keeps kissing her 'cause they extra] Janis: am I staying the night? Jimmy: yeah Janis: Good Janis: reluctantly go in now then Jimmy: would you have come all this way just to kiss me? Janis: 😶😳 Jimmy: then we can't go in yet Jimmy: [more kisses 'cause he's swooning bitch] Janis: I want to kiss you all the fucking time Jimmy: go on Janis: [Kisses first to end him] Jimmy: [Gotta give her a loud reaction back 'cause she's earning it] Janis: Fucking hell baby Janis: that ws the best thing I've ever heard Jimmy: if you wanna hear it again you know what to do Jimmy: whenever Janis: I don't wanna hear anything else Jimmy: but I've gotta let you get a word or sound in sometimes Jimmy: if only for me Janis: only for you Janis: fuck I'm so wet can we eat later or is that so anti-social and rude Jimmy: we can Jimmy: Cass & Bobby eat the speed of light, they were basically done before you got here Janis: I promise to be good and social and everything we need to be later Jimmy: I'm not asking for nowt Jimmy: you're here, I got what I wanted Janis: not yet you didn't Jimmy: alright yeah Jimmy: so come on Janis: 😍 Jimmy: [Hand holding to go inside, making Winnie's dream's come true]