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jovnie · 3 years

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The devil's desire | Yoongi

Summary;

You fell in love with a man of many pasts, however he desired more than a relationship. He wanted your soul for eternity.

Words: 13k

Devil yoongi! Demon au! Human reader

Very Dark themes

Warnings: religious concepts, gore, porn without plot, death, big dick yoongi, clubbing, kidnapping, non-con touching, blood, cnc, prey ( y/n ), stalker yoongi, drugged, drugs, chains, cutting, rough sex,

"She's almost ready sir!" a winged creature announced. Nodding in his throne, he took the mirror and looked through it. There you were getting ready to meet a mysterious guy at a club or well hoping to once again. He smirked devilishly knowing you remembered to come back to this particular club.

He previously brought you to this nightclub in Korea, hidden through an alleyway in the darkest part of Busan. There was danger and a constant fear of being robbed, kidnapped. Even if Korea was a safe place, things like kidnapping and murder still happen and even more so at night.

He remembered that you kept a knife and a taser with you, he liked the vulnerability you had going to a place not meant for angels let alone humans at night. He found it charming how oblivious you are to your surroundings as well. He was a man of darkness and hell for sure, but one thing was for sure. He only craved humans who were pure and light energetically. 'Suppose you did know that the Club was own by the devil himself, would that really stop you' he thought.

He watched her put on clothes and noticed how delicate she was in his eyes. No, this wasn't the first time he'd watch her. Not the last either, it seemed like a generational curse in his eyes. He wasn't mad he placed it on the females to feel tempted by his actions, however, each one passed the test. you however failed it the first two times, making it the third time.

Sighing, he put the mirror down and stood up. Stretching, he allowed his black feather wings to elongate and move around before putting them away. Looking at his watch it was a quarter past 11 pm, he'd knew you want to be early and try and catch a good table. However the little worry of what if someone wanted to take you before him, hurt you before him. The thoughts riled him up, making him grab his keys and wait by the portal. Besides the gate doesn't open until 11:59, so his intrusiveness can calm for now.

While waiting, he took out the cute little human hand mirror you'd gifted him a while back. He looked at himself and the scar over his left eye, "maybe this is what attracts them" he chuckled softly.

As time fastened, he waited for the lock in the air to appear. He waited long and hard for that little red lock and once it appeared, he opened all the portals from his underworld to the human world and the other one which lead stright to his club.

Formally known as 666 plaza to hadians, the chosen humans only knew it as void 218. To you it was just another club on the holy day of Sunday. Although you were never brought up with Christianity, you had the basics that everyone knew, loved, and hated.

Waiting by the gates or humanly known as "doors" you pulled out your phone to realize there was no battery or charge. Confused as you could've sworn it was full when you left, you herd the doors open and the mini line began moving. Your eyes wandered the room to find the stairs that led to the upper level where you would meet and see Yoongi. You knew it was stupid to keep doing this, but with yours and his schedule it wasn't at all.

Passing by the few people, you found upstairs and walked up seeing there were already people inside which confused you, but you paid little attention to it. Waiting by the usual black velvet seats and area, you head a familiar voice.

"Is this your regular peach vodka with light ice?" yoongi asked loudly over the now loud music playing. Nodding, you sat up and greeted him before getting your drink. Little did u know about his plans with you or what tonight was gonna be.

Smiling softly, yoongi was gentle eyes admired your beauty as he get down with his own drink. He took a sip of his own drink that was laced with a sleeping drug, one that'd do nothing to him and more to you.

"So what are you doing here?" He asked knowingly.

"Well, it's a Sunday and I have nothing planned so I thought I come by" you lied, hoping the white lie would slip. Nodding, yoongi put his hand on your thighs and moved closer to talk to you about life and each other week. You mentioned something about the campus or school you were studying and he lied about his "forensics" job and how hard it was to see how people died. Continuing, he bought the two of you more drinks and when the timing was right offered one of his. Thanking him for the kind jester, you took a sip. He smiled and also took a sip after you, then placed it back down.

"Good isn't it?" he said, reaching over to his phone and at the time. Noticing he did so you hummed and snuck another sip. Then another. Whatever was in had you almost drinking his entire cup down.

"Omg what is this, what's making it so good. I can't put my finger on it" she said as her words slowed down and her eyes blinked slowly. He watched her body start to feel tired, then at the right moment whispered in her ear "apple, cherry, lime, it's a light alchcolic drink and right, drugs."

Soon as her eyes closed and body dropped, he mustered enough strength to pick her up and sling you over his shoulder. "Another one taken by the devils favorite drink, poison apple," he whispered knowing nobody cared to stop him not could. Well not if they wanted hells punishment if not worse death, even if they were immortal. Walking up the last set of stairs he opened the portal and handed the keys to his servant and told him to look after.

Noting the girl, the servant nodded and knew the king was gonna take his time and would be in a long "meeting." Taking charge of the place, yoongi walked up to his Castle surrounded by blue flames in the middle of nowhere and walked in. He demanded for total privacy, meaning nobody in or even near the castle or be banished for eternity and with that everyone wondered what that soul did to get his undivided attention. From there gossip spread about you from one to another creature and it traveled fast.

Meanwhile, he laid you on the bed and looked at his watch. The drug last about 30 minutes and about 20minuets have gone. From there he requested one trusted worker with a list. The list was :

The devils list

Body Chains and rope

Salt and a black cross

2 Robes

Wipes

Black paint

Sheep's blood

Lube any flavor

Nodding the worker flew off and yoongi allowed his wings to expand out his back and eyes to turn a dark blue color as his hair contained white strips. He watched your sleeping body, before checking the time and seeing he has 5 minutes left before you wake up. Taking that in he stretched his neck and before activating his speed and undressing you, cleaning the area around the bed, making sure the chain locks are stable and if not changing them, turning off lights and lighting candals all around the room and the whole castle and finally sitting down at the edge. Checking the time once again, he had 3 minutes left and so did the worker before he'd get pissed and with that thought the worker came to drop everything off before yoongi told him to get lost.

With the activation of speed he quickly undressed, sat the cup near the bed and filled it with sheeps blood, put salt near the edge without touching it as it stung him, put the cross around his neck and began drawing a ritual circle around the bed then finnaly the walls. To end everything he placed the chains on your hands and feet then connected to each end of the bed. The rest of the stuff he just put next to the bed and laid naked above you waiting for you to wake up.

He knew the drug was strong, but he didnt think it was that strong so he checked the time again and 10 minutes had passed by. Sighing, he began taking the knife and cut a slit on his wrist and placed the wound to your mouth. After a few blinks, you began to wake up and within a second you panked and a minute later realised you were chained.

Weak, scared, targeted, blood covered lips, chained and his favorite vulnerability he finally felt aroused at the sight. With lust in his eyes and an aura darker than night himself, he slowly kissed your cheek.

"Welcome to hell baby" he greeted, confused you closed your eyes and for once prayed you'd be able to wake up in where you left to only get the image of him drugging you and making you pass out. To then opne them and see the same sight.

"Wouldn't that make you?" She paused trying to yank the chains.

"Hades, satan the devil or whatever you humans call me for ruling the underworld. Then yes that's me and as you see, you're caged like a bug trapped in a spider's web. How cute. How naive to trust anyone you've properly met either. " he whispered the last bit in your ear as his lips traveled around your chest and neck leaving hickeys as he moved.

Groaning, you tried yanking the chains hearing a noise and hoping it ment it broke to realise no he fooled you with the sound of his nails knocking on the wood.

"Got you" he chuckled as you began scared, moving his lips towards your breast he sucked softly getting slight moans from your mouth. "Mm good girl continue with it an d maybe I'll spare your soul" he joked, sucking and groaning your other breast with his hands. Ignoring him and forcing your mouth to close. He raised an eyebrow and sat up, he then looked at your mouth and then his length.

"That wasn't smart now was it dsrling?" He asked, as his crouch hovered your mouth and his length being rubbed on your face as the other hand rested on the wall. "Noe open wide and if not, I can allways just shove it. Dont think about biting as i can manually remove teeth of needed" he mentioned as tears rolled down your eyes as he slowly entered his length.

"Good girl, suck it like that" he groaned, slowly moving his hips all the way in and out. With doing so he admired the trlaclesnt salty wetness driping from her eyes that he took a finger and wiped it. Caressing her face as he continued thrusting and groaning till he felt hard enough and then pulled out. Wiping her eyes again he grabbed the lube and posed the non negotiable question of

"May I pretty angel, take this as mine?" He whispered softly as he leaned down to her ear. Nodding yes a tear ran and he licked it clean, causing a slight shiver down her body. "Good" he replied, putting lube around his own length and stoking it on.

"If you cum on me will I get pregnant?" You asked shyly.

"Mm, well yes and that's my goal princes or should I say queen. Your body is mine after all." he tells, taking his fingers and tracing a cross between your chest as he watches a dark mark appear in a mini cross between your chest.

Crying harder knowing you've not only been kidnapping, but there was an even little chnace of seeing your family friends and well your little pet. "I love when you cry my love" he said softly as his fingers softly rubbed against you clit and his lips attach to yours. Knowingly you kissed back and surprisingly it felt like comfort but tasted like sin and poison. One your body will soon adapt to. As your mouths moved in unison, his fingers rubbed softly around your bud and you were finally able to relax and enjoy the feeling. He had an undeniable hold on your body, one your soul started to grow a liking too the longer her rubbed and kissed your lips. Soon you became hungry for more and grinded against his hand and with the hint he rubbed quicker as you moaned down his throat and his free hand now snaking behind your back. Moaning more you called his name, in which he loved begging you to say again.

"YOONGi!"you moaned louder as his stomach and cock felt it making it twitch slightly. stoping his finger he guided his tip and put his chin on your neck and slid in slowly, taking his time as you adjusted before moving faster. You pulled the chains trying to hold onto him but he shook his head no and softly held your body up with the help of the chains and began pounding into you.

No it was not a speed nor length you were used to, but the feeling you could by a heartbeat. You legs became weak, your back arched hard, your mouth could only stay open and your head was in a daze as he fucked you without mercy. His length was big enough to make you scream from the top of your lungs and beg for more. He loved that and too started moaning which soon started to sound like deep breathes and heavy grunts. He loved the warm, pulsing feeling of your pussy on him as it dripped with cum around him.

"Ah, fuck, That's hot!" he moaned loudly. Moving his hips closer, he pushed his length in deeper and the sounds of his hips crashing into yours echoed the room. You were now at a point of no return, all you could do was moan and take him, which only increased his horniness and overall arousal.

"I'm close!" yoongi groaned and panted as his hips movements slowed down, but the deepness was still there. Shopping, yoongi's body out of tiredness fell on top of yours and he kissed your neck softly. Without enough energy to pull out, he came deep, groaning in your neck and laying still. Both overly fucked out and deep breathing, laid there until yoongi got enough energy to unchain your hands and drink from the cup of blood that started to reek and fill the room. The room that once smelt like lavender and vanilla now smelled like sex and sheep's blood. Leaning down to kiss you, you kissed back with your body begging to ache like hell and body starting to contort you screamed in pain. Whispering something into your neck, he held you close to his chest as you grabbed and scratched his back till the blood came from it.

"Submit and it'll go quickly." he whispered tired as can be. Taking his advice, you closed your body and let it take over. Suddenly your eyes and hair became white as a dove and the pain stopped. Not only did he claim you as his, the kiss of blood crowned you queen of the underworld.

They laid naked as each could no longer have the strength to get up, but hold each other in a soft hug. Comferting and relaxing, considering what had to happen. They slept wedded that night, perfectly times as the full moon was now full and the ritual circle could light up red as the two came into harmony.

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funneyheehooman · 3 years

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i cannot BELIEVE I DIDNT LIKE the 'disc finale is staged theory' before yesterday. i cannot BELIEVE myself- ITS SO FUCKING SMART. i just watched animagician's video on it and it puts so many things into retrospect- it is absolutely genius, it is backed up by so, so so much evidence, everything calls for it- c!dream would NEVER be as hasty as he was for the final disc confrontation!!! THIS HAS TO BE IT WHAT THE FUCK??1GRYFT SDFHJA ITUYGH!HUGYTF!!

LMAO-

for shame vil I've believed this theory when it first started going around >:D /lh (pff- What made u turn away from it initially tho :0?)

And ur so right- just overall what happened at the time really points to it.

With c!dream, he was never super flashy, and even if he was he usually wasnt the main focus (ie. Nov. 16th, Doomsday, etc). He'd usually let the others take the more prominent role.

With the disc finale, it just felt so odd to me honestly, he created this blackstone structure just to house everybody's attachments? (this one is more in character but still the extent he does it). And with a very conventiely placed portal that anyone could walk to and get in if they knew where they were going?

As well, before the finale, c!dream and c!punz had a discussion about the nature of their relationship. That even though c!punz is a mercenary, and their relationship has been mostly for transaction sake, they both agreed that their relation goes beyond simple service and payment. That they were friends.

As well, c!dream warned c!punz that being too close to him could lead to him getting hurt. They had to figure out some way to show that c!punz wasn't on c!dreams side anymore. Originally I believe they planned on c!dream tried to steal/or kill c!punz horse pumpkin. But that's never brought up again.

C!punz was the guy who knew where c!dream was located, he knew where the portal was, and he was the one who lead the charge against c!dream. The reason? C!Tommy paid c!punz more than c!dream did (which I sincerely doubt, c!dream used to be one of the richest players, but I digress) c!punz and c!dream both just had a discussion on how they shouldnt be seen as allies. And a perfect opportunity comes right into their laps to show how they arent allies anymore.. just feels like too much of a coincidence.

Then, we get to Enderboo (c!ranboo in his enderstate), both cc!ranboo and cc!dream said that the staring at eachother was on purpose. Why would it be though? If this wasn't planned, wouldn't enderboo try helping his ally? No, instead it's been confirmed that in the beginning Enderboo was c!dreams most common visitor. Also I do wanna mention that Enderboo is just c!ranboo but with all of his memories intact. So Enderboo isnt a separate entity but just the same c!ranboo (this has been confirmed in a lore stream). The relationship between the two is so vague, but I really believe it's a mutual partnership or mentor/student dynamic (esp with the lessons).

And dont even get me started on the stone theory lol- both c!ranboo and c!punz have both gone like "oh we need stone chat, why? It's a secret chat :)/I dont really know ik I just need it" like CMON. That's so fucking suspicious (I'll link a good post about the stone theory here when I find it ;;)

I could talk forever on this theory- like I 99.9% believe it's true theres just too much pointing to it imo

But just imagining c!dream practicing monologuing evilly to c!ranboo and c!punz and they're both trying not to laugh in the background makes me just 🥰🥰

Also the skeppy cage is funny ngl, just imagining that discussion is fkn hilarious pff-

#dreamwastaken #dreamsmp #c!dream #disc finale #c!ranboo #c!punz #ranboo #punz

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heyitsyn · 4 years

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Manager!Seijoh KYO ROUTE

a/n: AAAAA HERE IT FINALLY IS!!!!! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!!!!

THIS IS KYO’S ROUTE AND TBH, I REALLY WANT TO MAKE AN IWA ROUTE BUT I ALSO WANT TO MAKE AN OIKAWA ROUTE BC IT HAS BEEN BROUGHT TO MY ATTENTION THAT SOMEONE’S FAVORITE IS ACTUALLY OIKS AND I WANT TO GIVE HER THAT ENDING AND I WANT IWA TO HAVE AN ENDING AS A PERSONAL REQUEST HEHEHEHEHEHE

REMINDER, THIS IS A WHAT IF SCENARIO LIKE WHAT IF SHE ENDS UP WITH KYO AND HOW WOULD IT HAPPEN SO THIS IS NOT REALLY GOING TO BE PART OF THE MAIN MANAGER!SEIJOH SERIES

anon requests:

-i love the seijoh manager one and i was just wondering if i could please request one where she ends up with kyoken

-OH MY GOD Can y/n-chan and kyoubabie end up together and like how would the team react wawlndksndkfnkdndkfnkd im so soft

-I kinda like the idea after the time skip that Kyo and the manager end up together, he's still such a softie for her. I feel like after seeing how Kyo acts around her the team wasn't surprised that they ended up together and kinda expected it.

- what if manager reader and Kyotani kiss 😳👉👈

- hi I love your seijoh manager aus! They’re so cute and wholesome but also very chaotic 😭 I have a request,, if yn and kyo end up together then can you do a scenario where the boys find out and are like 👁👄👁 huh, u choose the dog?? NDJJS IDK KYO IS SO UNDERRATED BUT N E WAYS ILY AND YOUR SERIES YOURE SO TALENTED 😭💕

i totally not already planned this part from the last part

tw: hint of abuse

ALSKDFJASDKJAFKLDSJFLKA HINATA SAID NYOOM

so,,, yep lets start

hehehehehehehe kyo is so protective like bls be mine

even though miyo has been expelled and doesnt mess w you anymore, he still looks out for you and makes sure no one messed w you

like he actually goes to the first floor immediately and leans on the wall outside your class so he could walk with you to the gym or to lunch

at first, you thought it was bc oikawa told him to look out for you but when you found out it was competely all him, you were so soft for him and appreciative at him taking the time to go to you

like one day after class, you were planning on just eating lunch inside the classroom with kunimi and kindaichi but you were thirsty and felt stuffed in the room so you excused yourself to go eat at the roof

as you opened the door, you came face-to-face with the blonde upperclassman and you were so shocked that you closed the door on impulse

you said haha not today satan

but you realized who he was and hurriedly opened it

‘ohmagod im so sorry kyo-san!’

he shrugged

‘its fine’

you smiled apologetically and cleared your throat

‘so,,, what can i do for you, kyo-san?’

he shoved his hands in his pockets bc in truth, he didnt really know, but he caught sight of your bento on your hands

‘the roof?’

he asked making you look at him, impressed

‘howd you know?’

‘if youre not eating in there, the roof would be the only other place youd eat, right?’

you leaned against the doorway and reached forward to rub his arm

‘you stalking me now, kyo-san?’

he narrowed his eyes and looked away

but he grabbed your hand before interlacing your fingers and you were shocked to be dragged with him to somewhere in the school

‘the roof’

was all he said and you quickly kept up to pace with him until you arrived your destination at the top of the school

it was quite a cloudy day so the sun was actually out of view but it wasnt going to be a rainy day

the temperature was slowly getting colder since you were now transitioning from fall to winter but you didnt care bc it was still fresh air

you hurriedly tugged him forward and sat him down next to you so you both were seated together

‘do you not eat lunch kyo-san?’

‘no. i dont have time’

he pulled his knees up to his chest and wrapped his arms around them while you laid your legs on a straight line in front of you so you could rest the box on your lap

kyo laid his cheek on his arm as he watched you excitedly unwrap the cloth and open the mint-green lid to reveal the rice and tamagoyaki with chicken bites inside

‘itadakimasu!’

you softly clapped your hands then positioned your chopsticks but you paused, head turning to kyo

he felt like he was caught stealing something lmao stealing glances get it so he quickly averted his gaze to the railing that surrounded the roof

you delicately placed a hand on his arm which gave you his attention and you raised a piece of the egg dish

‘one?’

you offered and he shook his head but you pouted at him making him sigh then open his mouth

now you were no gorgon ramsai im cackling sorry but you could cook since your mother believed that you werent a girl unless you knew how to cook

his eyes were shining as he chewed and you giggled before holding up another piece which he quickly snatched up

‘ill bring you your own bento tomorrow kyo-san~!’

and you did

the next day, you waited for him at your class and when you caught sight of him walking from your class window, you bounced up in your seat, startling kindaichi from eating his noodles

‘y/n?’

kunimi questioned but you werent even looking at him

‘ill see you later, aki!’

you waved and opened the door to go to kyo, who lowkey got scared when you just ran up to him

he raised his hand to ruffle your hair and you got closer to him and held out the blue box

‘here. as promised’

he held the box and stared at it, like it was the first time someone gave him this

you took his surprise as gratitude and grabbed his hand, swinging it as you talked about your lessons on your way to the roof

when he opened it, he lifted the first container and saw what was hiding at the very bottom shelf

it was a serving of famima chicken with its wrapper stil intact

‘how-’

‘saw you eating it when you first joined the team. then i started noticing you eating it whenever we go to the convenience store’

the fact that you were so perceptive towards him brought an unfamiliar feeling inside him that made his heart thump and stomach to tickle

‘dont worry, kyo-san! i made sure everything was good!’

your eyes closed due to the intensity of your grin and you raised a thumbs up to prove your word further

he blinked at you and truly thought you were an angel

an angel sent down to help a lost hope like him?

was that you?

were you his angel?

during practice, he was actually very calm and collected and wasnt pushing anyone at all which surprised everyone

iwaizumi even stared at him confusingly and if iwa was looking at him like that, the entire team knew something was up

‘oi, kyotani, you good? you sick?’

rip 2020 would like to know your location

the fake blonde turned to him and shook his head, face free of any glare or irritation

in fact, he looked like a completely different person if not for the hair

‘im good’

he answered

‘did they have a buy one get one sale on that chicken of yours?’

oikawa tested

if he answered him, something was definitely wrong

‘no. i dont think so’

yep, something was wrong

oikawa was screaming and shouting that the world was going to end while the others were laughing, panicking, and worrying while iwa just stood there, staring at his underclassman

you returned from filling up the bottles and was confused at the state of the team

‘i-um-what happened’

kyo’s ears perked up at your voice and he bounded up to you like a doggie seeing its owner come home

you smiled and reached up to place a hand on his shoulder with ease bc he was one of the shorter players therefore easier to reach

‘did oikawa-san break again?’

you asked and he nodded

‘hes being an idiot’

he mumbled

‘hes just being oikawa-san, kyo-san. you still have to respect him as your captain, remember that’

you said and he rolled his eyes but nodded anyways

‘fine. only because you said so’

iwa was watching this interaction with very wide eyes and his confusion only grew like 10 million times

kyotani kentarou never answered to anyone and if he did, that must be earned

as far as iwa knew, kyo was just so soft to you and treats you so different than the 7.8 billion people in the world

no person in the world could ever get kyo to act like that except you

and there had to be a reason

and iwa was pretty sure he knew

after practice, you were scheduled to look after the cats in shinsou’s house so you were going to walk with kyo

he was impatiently waiting for oikawa to finish talking to you until his patience just snapped and he grabbed you and lifted you up to his arms then just started walking, surprising everyone in silence

you instinctually wrapped your legs around him and held on to his shoulders tightly while his arms were bounded around your waist

‘OI! KYOKEN-CHAN! HOW DARE YOU STEAL Y/N-CHAN!’

oikawa was punching the air

you placed your cheek on his shoulder and let out a breathy chuckle

‘you couldnt wait for another second, kyo-san?’

‘the trash was starting to reek’

you laughed and grimaced at the laughter that bubbled out of you

‘so mean, kyo-san!’

your laughter made him subconsciously smile and he held you closer, placing his chin on your shoulder as he continued on the trek to the familiar purple house

once you did arrive though, kyo refused to let your hand go

ope reference?

‘kyoooooo~! cmon! let me gooo~!’

‘no’

he grumbled and continued to hold your hand tighter as you tried to tug it free so you could walk up the gates to your employer

‘i need to work~! pleeeease~!’

you whined but he scrunched his nose in distate, pulling your hand forward so you stumbled into his chest where he wrapped both arms to cage you in

‘no. i dont want you with that grape head’

he growled lowly making you laugh and you turned so your ear would be right above his heart

it was beating fast

his scent travelled up your nose and you closed your eyes, snuggling even further

cherry blossoms and vanilla with the slightest hint of sandalwood

‘i need to go’

you mumbled but he gripped your tighter

‘stay with me’

he whispered

tbh you wouldve if literally hizashi-san didnt catch you at the front of his house cuddling

it was quite an embarrassing encouter when he wouldnt stop talking about it and you had to actually push him and aizawa out the door

‘we were really rooting for hitoshi but do what makes you happy, dear!’

‘hizashi-san, please!’

you werent really aware of how clingy kyoken was and it only caught your attention when during one of your lunch (dates), he clinging on to you

your position has now shifted so you were sitting between his legs while you fed him food and he would rest his chin on your shoulder to watch the clouds and sky

‘kyo-san, did something happen? youre clingier than usual’

he shook his head and buried his face in your neck

‘allergies’

he whispered and you leaned your head on top of his, continuing on eating your food

‘hey, kyo-san, do you think it will snow soon? we’re getting into december already so it would snow soon, right?’

you asked and he emerged from his spot

‘i hope so. that would be nice. we need a little more snow now and then’

im SCREAMING RIGHT NOW AND TEARS ARE WELLING UP IN MY EYES HELP-

‘yea. yea. when it falls, i want to go out and stand in it. if we’re lucky, we could have a snowball fight up here. whaddya think, kyo-san?’

pls dont blast at me with the timeline bc tbh my timeline is so messed up and if i was to fix that, id basically have to scrap this entire series bc of how messy with the timeline it is

‘yea. we will’

he hugged you tighter that day

when he didnt show up for practice, you were frantically looking for him

did he skip?

you knew how he struggled not being able to play with the others and missing this opportunity wasnt something he would do

and you were worried where he was and he might be hurt somewhere

you ran out of the gym and out of the school grounds, running through the alleys and any secluded area bc he mustve had a bad day and wanted to get away

indeed, you found him in the alleyway and you were horrified at his bloodied face and ruffled clothing

he was seated on the floor, head leaning against the wall with his eyes closed, even oblivious to the dogs and cats that were worriedly nudging him

‘kyo-san!’

you shrieked and his eyes flew open and he quickly stood up to run but you were quicker and restrained him with your arms around his middle

it was so bad

his foster family,,,, everything was such a mess

he trembled in your arms and you felt his fear, his terror, and you gently, but firmly, held him so you could look at his face

he was staring at the floor angrily, tears welling up in his eyes and you shakingly placed a hand on his cheek, bringing it down so he could rest his forehead against yours

assuring words would fall deaf to his ears so you didnt even bother

instead, you tried to hold his hand, ignoring the flinching, but gently held it and brought it up to rest on top of where your heart would be

his eyes closed and your forehead nuzzled against his

‘feel my heartbeat. recognize me, as it beats for you’

you whispered to him, his other hand shakingly touching the hand that was on his face so he could caress it and he moved his head, placing a kiss on your palm

‘its beating for kenta-kun,, no foster family, no volleyball team, nobody else and nothing else matters but my heartbeat, so focus on it. because this is everything i could give you so treasure it, please’

you whispered, your own tears falling, hurting for your love

okay im full sobbing

‘and the snow. it will snow soon and you and i,,, we will go outside and we will play in the snow. the world will turn white but your colors will still paint my sight. let my heartbeat be your colors and let me color your canvas during the snow, kyo-san. it will beat for you, and only you, for as long as you let it. your heartbeat has painted mine already and its the most beautiful colors ive ever seen’

he cried for the first time that day, not in pain or sadness, but in happiness, because he can finally see it

your love and your colors starting to brighten the black and red hes grown accustomed to and helping him see, indeed, the world was beautiful

but it was truly your colors that made him realize that

kyotani and you stayed in that position for a long time and yahaba, who went after you, saw and quickly ran back to the gym to assure that you were alright and kyotani was safe, in your arms

after the natsu fiasco, he was a frequent visitor in your house and your family gets the gist of yanno, his home life, and your mother even gave him the spare key of the house

‘if y/n-chan trusts you, i do too’

yall what 😭

at night, you would lay out at the backyard, laying side-by-side and pointing at the stars and making up stupid stories as to why that star was brighter than the other or why the moon was built like that

but kyo was more focused, much happier, that he can see everything so much clearer and better

he turned his gaze from the stars to you beside him, your hair spreading out beneath you and your eyes sometimes disapperaing when you would laugh too hard

‘i wonder why the night sky is blue instead of black like the universe’

you wondered out loud but kyotani whispered something you didnt think youd ever hear from him

‘because you let me paint everything with my colors and i refuse to let you see something that i suffered seeing my entire life’

you returned his gaze and this was the real kyotani kentaro

not kyoken,

not kenta-kun

kyotani kentaro

and my god was he beautiful

he kissed you that night

it wasnt anything lustful, nothing aggressive, but not exactly gentle

it was a perfect balance of need yet hesitance that made it so much more powerful and important because it relayed the unspoken words that he had the hardest time letting out

and that was okay with you

kyo’s eyes and touch said everything he wanted to say

there was no one in sight, no body to judge the violent boy and the kind girl, just you and him with the man in the moon, gently smiling that the so-called lost cause finally found his redemption

okay that serious and sad stuff is finally out of the way and no more crying this time so dont be sad anymore :(

your relationship was never something you flaunted around or bragged about bc you and kyo were pretty private people so nobody really knew bc kyo still acted the way he would when oikawa would flirt you but yahaba noticed

oh lordie he noticed

he noticed kyo was much angrier when oikawa does his antics and he would stick closer to you, exchanging bashful smiles with you

the team only noticed when you seemed to just glow

like not like a glowstick

but like your,,, aura,,,

you laughed more, you smiled more, you teased everyone more

you were so,,, you

they had a hunch that something happened between you and kyo but they were never really sure

but ehehehe they confirmed it alright

the third years: mattsun, makki, iwa, and oiks were walking down the hallway when again, someone peaked out the window and saw you and kyo by the shade and you were perfectly angled so they could see the two of you

you were pressed against the wall while kyo was hovering over you with an arm beside your head while his hand was caressing your hip

makki let out a chortled scream that caught the attention of the others and he pointed at you two wordlessly

omg WAS KYOTANI SMILING

they watched as kyo smiled then teased you by kissing your nose, then your cheeks

‘kyo, kiss me right!’

you whined but giggled

kyotani had a teasing smirk but continued kissing you everywhere but where you wanted

‘hm? here? or here?’

right below your ear was your ticklish spot and he knew that so his kisses there tickled you and sent you on a giggling spree

‘kyo~~~!’

finally, he relented and gave you a sweet, yet passionate kiss that always managed to leave you breathless

that was when oikawa went on a rampage

well, he waited until classes were over but during practice, oh girl he went on a rampage

‘Y/N, KYOTANI!’

everyone knew he was serious when he didnt call them with those ridiculous nicknames

ngl you were scared too but kyo just glared at him

‘what’

he grumbled but you instinctively placed a hand on his arm

‘are you dating now, y/n, kyotani?’

iwa gently asked but oikawa was being oikawa

oikawa glared at you then pouted

‘OUT OF EVERYONE HERE, YOU CHOOSE THE DOG?!’

everyone gave each other nervous looks bc they kinda expected this but oikawa asking it like that made them sweat

they expected kyo to blow up but it was you who glared at oikawa, standing protectively in front of kyo

‘and what about it?’

you hissed and oikawa jumped, a hand over his heart

‘REALLY, Y/N-CHAN?! HIM?!’

‘yea and whats the problem with it? how is it your business? why do i need to validate my feelings for him? who do you think you are?’

oml kyo had to drag you out of there bc you were seriously about to fight oikawa for even having the NERVE to say that to you

like kyo held you up with his arms under your armpits as you were kicking the air and wanting to go back in there

‘no! let me go! kyo! i will hit him! come on! baby please!’

you whined and continued kicking

as much as kyo wanted to see you violently hit oikawa, he knew you would feel bad about it later and be guilty for hurting your captain

‘puppy, please. youre too angry right now and i will not sit there and listen to you whine and be sad that you hit oikawa tonight’

you hmphed and crossed your arms

he finally set you down but he wrapped his arms around you from behind and he placed a kiss on your cheek

‘but im really happy though. im really happy that you would fight for me’

but you stayed mad, pouting and looking away with your arms crossed

it was a cute sight honestly

‘of course i would. i would fight anyone who says stuff about you because i love you’

you ranted, just realizing what you said when you finished

no one has exactly said the ‘L’ word yet so you were partly scared that you said it

but kyo laughed then kissed your neck affectionately

‘i love you too, but my puppy is a nice, gentle, kind, little angel’

every compliment earned you a kiss and your tough and angry act finally slipped and you were giggling in his arms

‘yanno, if someone were to see you like this, they would think youre an impostor’

you commented in between giving him little pecks

he shrugged

‘meh. i dont care. i have you so i dont really care what they say about me. but now about you on the other hand-’

you slapped him on the chest

‘you hypocrite! youd fight someone for me but not me fighting someone for you?! how mean!’

you faked a look of surprise but he silenced you with a last kiss

‘youre so cute, y/n. my baby’

the team was a little bit in shambles while you two were away with the third years basically crying and pouting but they really did see this coming so no one was genuinely surprised, even oikawa

‘she really picked him, huh?’

iwa mumbled, a sad smile on his face as if he was just realizing it now

it was something they shouldve easily seen coming and accepted as kyo was so different around you and you treated him so much more than the rest

but why did it hurt so much?

as i mentioned before, they were all really hurting though because in a way, you were their first love

but they wish you to be happy and for kyotani to treat you right because you deserved the universe and more

TIME SKIP!!!!

OH YES I LOVE THIS!!!!

so basically, from my estimation, the timeskip is about 9 years after the third years graduate

so you are like 25 while kyo is 26

lets say you got a job as an editor alongside some guy named akaashi keiji while kyo was still playing volleyball

you got,,,, married quite early like tanaka and kiyoko and you have some minis running around

god decided to give you twins as children like a year after yall wed and currently, you were,,,, having another one??

ehehehe this part made my heart balloon up

imma make it so that kyo actually went to see the olympics with you and your kids are like 3 and theyre actually volleyball fans due to the influence of their uncles and father and partly you

it was easy to get tickets bc iwa literally works for the team and tooru is literally a player and they really wanted to see their godchildren

ngl the team was salty bc you picked them two as godfathers but next time, theyre making you pick out of a hat for your future child

so here you were, each parent carrying a child, lets say the girl is naomi while the boy is naoki, and the girl was wearing a mini argentina oikawa jersey that he specially got for his goddaughter while iwa got naoki a mini kageyama jersey just to spite oikawa

they each were wiggling in excitement to see their uncles and omg imma switch it again that the whole seijoh team is literally there like the og gang is there and watching the olympics

naoki and naomi were excitedly looking around at the unfamiliar faces and kyo was laughing when naomi tugged his collar when she saw her godfather’s picture upclose

‘papa! its kawa! kawa!’

she giggled and he ruffled her mini pigtails

‘it is, isnt it, mimi-chan’

while your son was calmly in your arms, you watched your husband and child interact with each other and her giggling as he tickled her nose

‘y/n-chan! kyoken!’

a familiar shout from only one person made you turn and see oikawa with the others at the back

of course he was huddled in a jacket to not attract attention but the og seijoh volleyball team was back together after so many years apart

‘kawa! hi!!’

naomi wiggled and she told her dad to let her down so she could run up to oikawa who was a few feet away

naoki also caught sight of his idol and you let him run after his sister but crash into the strong arms of iwaizumi

‘hello zumi’

naoki mumbled

‘hey little man! how are you?’

you gave everyone hugs and went to go to a restaurnt nearby to be away from the chaos of the people and kyo could tell you were getting tired standing

he helped you sit on a chair but you kept on grumbling to him

‘kenta, ive been pregnant before, with two! im fine, okay? so stop worrying’

kyo scrunched his nose but flicked your forehead

‘of course i have to worry. you have a literal human being inside of you’

‘well-’

but he used his hand to scrunch your cheeks to prevent you from speaking

‘what? hm, what was it, doll?’

the team gagged

‘seriously! we suffered 3 years of this already! stop it!!’

kindaichi whined

you stuck your tongue out at him and everyone got settled on their seats before ordering their food

the children were being entertained by the others and you were giggling at the antics of your friends

‘honestly, you all are nearly 30 yet you still act like children’

you scolded but had a smile on your lips to show you were actually teasing

‘and you act like youre 50 just because youre married with kids’

kunimi countered with his tongue out

you gasped before trying to reach over the table and snatch the tongue out of his mouth

‘come here you litte-’

but kyo gently sat you back down with a stiff smile

‘baby, doll, darling, love, i swear you forget youre not 18 anymore. please youre gonna send your husband to an early grave if you keep acting like this’

he whined, fake crying and the team was so shocked to see him still acting like this

‘oh my god, y/n-chan, how did you ever get kyoken-chan to be like this? did you brainwash him?’

oikawa mumbled

‘papa dont cry’

naoki tried to reach over the table from iwa’s arms to his father who he thought was really crying

yahaba shook watari in cuteness and mattsun turned to makki

‘can we get one?’

makki scoffed and hit him but still laughed

‘papa is worried that mama will hurt your baby brother, nao-kun’

kindaichi choked on his drink while oikawa screeched, holding naomi tighter

‘BROTHER?! ITS A BOY?!’

the guests in the restaurant were startled by the shriek from the argentina player and you gave kyotani a betrayed look

‘urusai, oikawa!’

kyotani snarled, face turning red at his blunder

‘CAN I BE GODFATHER THIS TIME?!’

‘YAHABA YOU IDIOT! ITS ME!’

‘WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?! YOU SHUT UP MATSUKAWA! ITS ME!’

‘OIKAWA YOU GREEDY LITTLE BIT-!’

‘SHUT UP OR I SWEAR TO GOD!’

you slammed your hands on the table, on your feet and glaring down at the men

naoki and naomi were already used to their mother yelling at uncle mattsun and uncle makki so they were snickering at their uncles terrified face

‘mama, they scared’

naoki commented, fiddling with iwa’s jacket zipper

‘its like y/n-chan and kyoken-chan switched personalities or something’

oikawa muttered, still looking wide-eyed at you

‘that’s it. kenta, hold my purse-!’

‘BABY, WHAT-!’

oh my god it was a sight to see

you have this <6 feet professional olympic volleyball player being hit by a pregnant short woman with her shoe and a bleach-blonde man trying to hold her hands so she alternated to kicking

‘y/n-chan! wait!’

‘nearly a decade later and 2 children later, y/n-chan still knows how to hit’

watari watched with a fond smile, reminiscing their old volleyball times

‘will y/n-chan be okay?’

yahaba worriedly asked but naomi gave him a smile that was a copy/paste of her father’s

‘no, uncle baba. its if kawa would be okay’

while everyone else laughed,

oikawa screamed

AND THATS A WRAP! if its not what you guys wanted, not gonna lie, i was even hesitant to write this part because as much as i love kyo, hes quite a hard character to understand and write for, but i didnt want him to be the typical brute caveman child, instead i wanted this to be like him showcasing that hes not just a screaming man but hes a scared boy whos awkward and doesnt know how to express himself. also, its not canon in the manga or the anime, but i put that he was in the foster system and they werent,,, nice,,,, so thats why he knew first aid bc he had to do it on himself and why he was so calm about her getting hurt and treating her. but thank you for reading this one and im about to write an iwa and an oikawa so expect that in the future!!!

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marauderspoet · 3 years

Text

here is my headcanon for how marauders era girls spent their valentines day in their 6th year!

they started the day of with waking up at 04.00 am each of them had planned something to do during the day and Lily and Alice weren't dating anyone (yet), so they were really excited for the idea of spending the day together. Marlene and Dorcas were dating eachother and had been since the begining of their 3rd year at hogwarts but they were perfectly fine with spending their valentines day with Lily and Alice. They were happy to have a change this year.

Dorcas had planned the first activity they woke up, got ready and headed out their dorm quietly. They quickly got into Dorcas's car and drove to a beautiful flower field next to a old train track. Dorcas brought out some food a big cloth and layed it down

(imagine it something like this but with more flowers <3)

they all sat down and unpacked their food for a unforgettable picnic, they ate their breakfast peacefully while listening to their favorite playlist that they had made together with all the songs that reminded them of how much they should cherish their teen years

♪♪𝐹𝑢𝑛𝑛𝑦 ℎ𝑜𝑤 𝑖𝑡 𝑠𝑒𝑒𝑚𝑠 𝑙𝑖𝑘𝑒 𝑦𝑒𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑑𝑎𝑦

𝐴𝑠 𝑖 𝑟𝑒𝑐𝑎𝑙𝑙 𝑙𝑜𝑜𝑘𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑜𝑢𝑡 𝑜𝑓 𝑝𝑙𝑎𝑐𝑒

𝐺𝑎𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑒𝑑 𝑢𝑝 𝑦𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑠𝑙𝑖𝑝𝑝𝑒𝑑 𝑎𝑤𝑎𝑦 u

𝑁𝑜 𝑡𝑖𝑚𝑒 𝑎𝑡 𝑎𝑙𝑙 𝑖 𝑓𝑜𝑙𝑙𝑜𝑤𝑒𝑑 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑖𝑛𝑡𝑜 𝑡ℎ𝑒 ℎ𝑎𝑙𝑙

𝐶𝑖𝑔𝑎𝑟𝑒𝑡𝑡𝑒 𝑑𝑎𝑦𝑑𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑚

𝑌𝑜𝑢 𝑤𝑒𝑟𝑒 𝑜𝑛𝑙𝑦 𝑠𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑒𝑒𝑛

𝑆𝑜𝑓𝑡 𝑠𝑝𝑒𝑎𝑘 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑎 𝑚𝑒𝑎𝑛 𝑠𝑡𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑘

𝑁𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑙𝑦 𝑏𝑟𝑜𝑢𝑔ℎ𝑡 𝑚𝑒 𝑡𝑜 𝑚𝑦 𝑘𝑛𝑒𝑒𝑠

𝑑𝑜 𝑑𝑜 𝑑𝑜 𝑑𝑜 𝑑𝑜 𝑑𝑜

𝑌𝑜𝑢 𝑐𝑎𝑛 𝑑𝑟𝑖𝑣𝑒 𝑎𝑙𝑙 𝑛𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑡

𝐿𝑜𝑜𝑘𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑎𝑛𝑠𝑤𝑒𝑟𝑠 𝑖𝑛 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑝𝑜𝑢𝑟𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑟𝑎𝑖𝑛

𝑌𝑜𝑢 𝑤𝑎𝑛𝑛𝑎 𝑓𝑖𝑛𝑑 𝑝𝑒𝑎𝑐𝑒 𝑜𝑓 𝑚𝑖𝑛𝑑

𝐿𝑜𝑜𝑘𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑎𝑛𝑠𝑤𝑒𝑟♪♪

-Cigarette Daydreams by cage the elephant

they all listened to the song Marlene resting her head on Dorcas's shoulder while everyone cuddling

after finishing up with their picnic they get back into the car blasting music, Lily drooping from the window

they arive to their next location again picked by Dorcas a beautiful lakeside. They were the only people there so they change into their bathing suits and jump into the water splashing and throwing eachother, piggy back riding and trying to push eacother of as they do so.

After splashing eachother for hours they get out and lay down at the fallen tree trunks while blasting the song tounge tied.

Not so long later Marlene drags everyone out and they all dance while singing the lyric

"𝑻𝑨𝑲𝑬 𝑴𝑬 𝑻𝑶 𝒀𝑶𝑼𝑹 𝑩𝑬𝑺𝑻 𝑭𝑹𝑰𝑬𝑵𝑫'𝑺 𝑯𝑶𝑼𝑺𝑬

𝑰 𝑳𝑶𝑽𝑬𝑫 𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑻𝑯𝑬𝑵 𝑨𝑵𝑫 𝑰 𝑳𝑶𝑽𝑬 𝒀𝑶𝑼 𝑵𝑶𝑾

𝑫𝑶𝑵'𝑻 𝑮𝑬𝑻 𝑴𝑬 𝑻𝑶𝑼𝑵𝑮𝑬 𝑻𝑰𝑬𝑫

𝑫𝑶𝑵'𝑻 𝑾𝑨𝑽𝑬 𝑵𝑶 𝑮𝑶𝑶𝑫𝑩𝒀𝑬"

As the song finished the four girls got up and made their way to the car for their next destination

as they were pretty tired they all slept in the car well.. except Dorcas, even tho she said she was fine Lily did make her change positions half way the trip so she could also get some rest

Their next destination was picked by alice, she had suggested to go to the candy factory down town after a hour of driving they made it there it was a big, very big factory with a every single type of candy you could imagine Marlene and Dorcas sprinted their way into the candy jewlery making area and started making evrery single type of candy they saw

Eventually they sad down after hours of runing around and grabbing candy (including being screamed at by five diffrent employes) and started making bracelets while Lily and Alice walked around admiring every single candy piece they saw.

After spending a good 2 hours they bought around 10 bags of candy and headed out the store recieving many bad looks from the employes there.

It was time for the second place Alice had picked she only told Lily cause she was the one driving and they had become super close lately she would rant to Lily about her boy troubles and not so suprisingly Lily was a very good listener.

25 minutes later they arrived standing right in front of the animal shelter that they were about to enter

Alice had talked to the owners and decided to volunteer together to the shelter. They all immedietly ran inside and were greeted my hundereds of dogs,cats you name it. They all started petting and feeding every single one of them and chatted with the owners a little learning about each animals past life. Some of them were abondened cause the owners didnt like them, others were abused by previos owners but now they were here, they were safe. They all decided after graduating they would buy their house that they will live together with and come adopt animals here. With that they exsited the shelter and made their way to the next location.

By this time they started getting hungry even tho they had eaten many many candys this was perfect on Lily's part cause her plan was to take the girls to a cafe.

Yes it sounded lame but this cafe was diffrent it was a flower shop and a place where people could go write some poetry and display them on the walls. She went there a lot when she wanted to clear her mind from things and it usually helped. After driving for a good 45 minutes they made it there, they got changed into some clean clothes and went in.

As they entered the smell of fresh baker bread and pastry filled their nose, the walls were filled with old looking papers with diffrent handwriting notes.They quickly sat down ordered some food that came with a piece of old looking sailor paper which they knew was for the poetry

They all ate their food while writing in silence, it was a comfortable silence with the sound of classical music filling their ear. Lily finished hers she got up and hang hers up next to many other works the rest of them did the same and they walked over to the flower section, they were astonished by the selection of diffrent flowers as they looked around They each got bouqets with their favorite flowers paid for them and left the store.

Lily's next stop was about a hour away if they walked so they decided to park the car and walk admiring the beautiful architecture around them they chatted and the hour didnt even seem that long since they didnt even realise they were at the next stop.

They were at a art museum, it was such a Lily place to go to but they didnt mind as they entered and tried not to get kicked out for being loud Lily gave them lectures on all the artwork and statues around them, Lily loved learning about all there things, it made her feel something and everytime she researched about these for hours flipping through pages of old books in a old library for hours made her feel at home. She talked and gave lectures about the history behind every piece and the girls couldn't help but just become so proud of her. They spent hours and hours there and before leaving they look a couple pictures of eachother.

It was getting later and by the time they got to the car it was already 5pm now marlenes request was perfect for the time they first drove back to their school to get to their dorms they each took a quick shower and changed into some aestehtic but comfortable clothes. Marlene's first request was pretty basic she had rented four bikes and suprised the girls.They quickly went down the streets and headed to Marlene's bigger plan but had a lot of fun while teasing eachother trying to get eachother to fall while trying not to get run over cars,

During the way Lily had opened her favorite playlist and was blasting some songs

𝑻𝒐𝒏𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕, 𝒘𝒆 𝒂𝒓𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒈

𝑺𝒐 𝒍𝒆𝒕𝒔 𝒔𝒆𝒕 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒍𝒅 𝒐𝒏 𝒇𝒊𝒓𝒆

𝑾𝒆 𝒄𝒂𝒏 𝒃𝒖𝒓𝒏 𝒃𝒓𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒖𝒏...........

The sun was about to set at this point and they had arrived at the last location. There was a huge carnaval standing right in front of them. They quickly dropped their bikes of at the place Marlene had bought them and headed to the carnaval. They were all hungry at this point because they hadn't eaten anything since their lunch at the poetry cafe so they ate hot dogs and bought candy apples,cotton candy alongside eating the food they had gotten from the candy factory.

They spent hours going in diffrent rides marlene and Dorcas going on all the couples rides whole Lily and Alice played the games that are just impossible to beat but managed to get some teddy bears for eachother. They went on many rollercoasters even tho Lily and Alice weren't really willing to but did it for Marlene and Dorcas.

After going on all of the fun rides like spinning teacups, the death drop and one of their favorites the Ferris wheel since the view was insanely beautiful they decided to head back to their dorm it was 1.00 am at this point but they didnt care they ran like maniacs in the middle of the road while singing at the top of their lungs cause they know they aren't going to be teenagers forever and they might not even live through another year

That was one hell of a day.

hello everyone that has read this!! this took me very long but tbh i love how it turned out and i really really hope you guys will as well! This story is also a reminder to make the most of your teenage years (which i am not atm and am sad)i also have a instagram account @/marauders_poet i would really appreciate it if you guys checked it out and if you are from tumblr dm me! i would really love to see who from tumblr will find me and i love chatting so dont be worried! love you all and i might put this story on wattpad if it does well i will update everyone on that :)

love you all!! <3

#harry potter #marauders fanfiction #marauders aesthetic #marauders textpost #lily evans #dorcas meadowes #teenager #hogwarts #slytherin #gryffindor #ravenclaw #marauders era fic #marauders era girls #marauders map #marauders fandom #marauders x reader #marauders era rp

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and-the-world-is-quiet-here · 4 years

Text

Live 2020 debate commentary from a salty, disabled, and VERY pissed gen Z

Yall he just said he’s immune

My dad just left the room

Bitch are u saying Johnson and Johnson is going to make the vaccine?

sir that’s the diaper company…..smh

Biden just said its going to be a dark winter

#winter is coming

“virus.....that came from china” -trump 2020

“were learning to live with it”-trump 2020

apparently “Biden lives in his basement”-your president 2020

totally accurate.....obviously

ohhhh biden just said were learning to die with it

trump interrupted biden

Mam I thought you said you were muting them?

biden laugh count at 3

he all about the once percent till its the dead ones

trump interrupting at 3...nvm its now 4

this debate is making my dog sad

interrupting now at 5 for trump

trump saying his young sons illness just “went away”

bitch he’s may age and no it did not just “go away”

he was in quarantine for two weeks

apparently nyc is a ghost town

its not a ghost town trump I live right next to it

loudest neighbors ever

trump don’t call him Anthony

his name is DOCTOR Fauci

treat him with the respect he deserves

Biden looks so sad

nvm he legit looks like the joker right now

HALFWAY MARKKK

why is this at 9?

sir its a school night

I need time to scroll through my feed for hours before collapsing

Biden don’t use the word sovereignty

trump doesn't know what it means

thats discrimination against trumps

ohhh hes attacking hunter (biden) again

so he has a wee drug problem?

at this point everyone got one!

your the one making lewd comments about your infant daughter on national tv

(look it up he talks about his 6 month old daughters legs but and breasts)

get him big b!!

h876689908776- my dog 2020

he wants to express his disappointment

the light boxs is stealing his mother attention

ohh hes being rude to the moderator again

u a strong independent Indian woman get him girll!

mute his mike

prty plz

I am dissapionted in you

he’s saying he’s not allowed to release his taxs

(that is a proven lie)

“i was put through a phony witch hunt”- you'll never guess 2020

hes going after his BROTHER now

how is this allowed?

who decided trumps strategy would be to accuse his opponent of his own crimes?

look at the insults guys its a crystal ball

stay ahead of the scandal's

WILL YOU LEAVE HIS SON ALONE PLEASE

THESE ARE HIS CHILDREN LEAVE THEM ALONE

“i was a business man doing business”-trump 2020

no sir you were another rich white guy taking advantage of tax brakes and cheap foreign labor in asia

#american jobs as long as i don’t have to pay minimum wage

#you know like a DECENT FUCKING PERSON

Trump interrupted again

I lost count a while ago

Biden is staring into my soul

oh Biden just played the middle class childhood card

I haven't heard a single mute so far?

trump just said his bromance with kim jung un saved america from nuclear war

dont through my boy Obama under the bus

and another interruption

my big bro just screamed “MUTE BUTTON MUTE BUTTON MUTE BUTTON”

honestly same

10 more min guys

hang in there

OHHH trump just got MUTEDDDDDD

Biden is now on legitimate policy

ahhh hes proud of his plan

annd trump just interrupted

trump just kissed up to the moderator

trump just said biden’s more liberal than bernie

ohhh

biden just said trump dosent know who hes running against

hes like “this is joe biden”

like I know bro but slick burn anyway

ohhh they muted trump again!!!!

perfect opportunity to mute missed

trump just blamed healthcare issues on nancy peloski

biden says the the republicans wont pass it

(btw hes actualy right)

2 mins left

and trump is speaking through it

1 min left

omg what a waste of air

I really want him to test his “immunity”

preferably during a harsh winter

ITS TEN GUYSSS

there running over

they still haven't covered immigration

shit

I have just learned there is 30 min left

I think I would rather kill myself than watch the rest of this

I’m seriously have a sensory overload right now

I’m doing this for u

“children are brought here by coyotes”-presedentail cown 2020

what a wack ass sentence

hes like ohIi haven't been putting kids in cages

and then just went but I didn't build them they were built in 2014

(contradiction much)

“who built the cages”

yes it was Obama but guess what

THEY WERNT BUILT FOR KIDS

there ment to house animals, evidence, and adult prisoners in emergency situations

THEY WERNT MENT FOR 3 YEAR OLDS

Biden was just like “well no actually kids come with PARENTS”

(kids hardly ever come over with out parents)

and then he was like and also WHO LOST TRACK OF OVER 1,000 PARENTS

(thats 500+ new orphans at the least)

hes saying only the illegal immigrants with the lowest IQs come back after being deported

we said the same thing in december about you but ya’know

my mum was like “anyone eating chocolate” and I was like “im snaking on this ignorance” and she was like “dont do that you'll get indigestion”

“no one has done more for the black community then Donald trump except for maybe Abraham Lincoln”

oh yeah Biden just brought up how trump publicly campaigned for the execution of the central park 5

WHO WERE CHILDREN

AND OH YEAH THEY WERE COMPLETELY INNOCENT

trump just yelled at Biden, got muted, and just yelled louder

trump just said he cant see the audience but hes the least racist person in the room

“Abraham lincoln here is one of the most racist presidents in american history”- biden 2020

biden just went “oh god”

he just said that he used to not support the blm movement because they chanted rude things about police officers

I would like to reiterate that “pigs in a blanket” has never been chanted in a protest or been a prominent statement in the blm movement nor “fry em like bacon” so what trump is saying is factually incorrect

unless hes on some sort of far right conservative twitter feed were he came across a video of some drunk white college kids chanting it

but you know what ever fits you narrative

plus I would be pretty pissed if I kept getting shot at for no reason so....

Biden making more logical decisions

trump was like why have you never done all this stuff when you were vice president

“we had a republican congress” -biden 2020

we have the cleanest air

we have the cleanest crystal clear water

sir, i know you've been to mexico

don’t lie

the waters gorges down there

and not owned by your smug ass

trump just called china filthy

so you know....

*whispers* racism

ok 5 min left

for real this time

trump just went “aoc plus 3: and then hes like she knows nothing about the climate

ummm.... you dont even believe in climate change

bidens like “are....is...is is”

good for you

correcting your grammar

trump just said “the wind kills all the birds” out of the godamn blue

(he means wind mills and its untrue)

“Whats the next question baba”

“the final question is leadership which he doesnt have”- baba 2020

I feel bad for anybody watching this on the toilet

bidens starring into your soul

he knows what your doing

there officially overtime

its 10 33

they haven't even done the last section yet

btw ITS A SCHOOL NIGHT

why do they host these so late

I should be pretending to be asleep right now

this is generational discrimination

plus trumps supporters are so old there asleep by now

ohhhh its over

1036 final time

okay so thoughts....I generally dont like the party system i think its ridiculous the system was not designed for it, and its now more about loyalty then the actual candidates. I also am really hesitant to put another strait white male in the oval office, especially one thats from “the lucky few” I.E. the smallest voting generation in the country and also the one that already holds the most positions. That being said, at this point its really anyone but trump and I think bidens got the experience to turn things around.

I AM IN SCHOOL I CANNOT VOTE. I am relying on all my older friends, followers, neighbors, and community members. To make an educated decision that wont further degrade the once hopeful future my generation awaits. Please if you can vote VOTE the kids are relying on you!

P.S. sorry i wasn't able to edit this earlier i struggle alot with spelling and didnt have the time to edit this because I HAD TO GO TO BED AND THEN GO TO SCHOOL. Why am I more politically active then people twice my age you might ask? Well, thats because adults are lazy and need to get of their gd asses and VOTE. So kids dont have to do the legwork for them.

I have said my peace now, have a wonderful day!

#2020 #election #covid #trump #biden #debate #byedon #flyden 2020

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thenighttrain · 4 years

Text

folklore first listen

pls feel free to ignore this, i just wanted to record my screaming on my blog so that i can refer back to it and laugh at myself someday x

The 1

THE PIANO OMG I LOVE IT AND I LOVE THE BEAT I looooove THIS SONG IT’S SO NOSTALGIC WHO THE FUCK IS IT ABOUT OH MY OGD IM SCREAMING also the swearing I’m living… ok seriously who is this about I am losing my mind. This is so bittersweet I’m ?!!!!!!!!!!!! I REALLY LOVE THIS

CARDIGAN

I ALSO LOVE THIS WHAT ITS’ SO NOSTALGIC and the music video is so pretty wit the green and she looks like an actual forest nymph with the piano and the water and it’s all incredible. YOU DREW STARS AROUND MY SCARS BUT NOW I’M BLEEDING???????? BITCH. THE LYRICS IN THIS ARE FUCKING INCREDIBLE WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK OH MY DISJFASLDFNSADF OH MY GDO I knew you’d linger like a tattoo kiss??????? MAAM?

The last great American dynasty

SO INTRIGUING HOW SHE WROTE THIS??? WHAT IS IT ABOUT? IDK BUT I LOVE IT

Exile

BON IVERRRRRR I LOVE THE WAY HIS VOICE SOUNDS IN THIS AND THE CHORUS IS HAUNTINGLY BEAUTIFUL and the background vocals… omg. This album his the most unique thing she’s ever written I????? I LOVE HOW HER VOICE SOUNDS N THE CHORUS. ‘You were my crown now I’m in exile seeing you out’? YOU KNOW LIKE I CAN IMAGINE THESE SONGS AS THE SOUNDTRACK TO SO MANY OF MY FAVOURITE FANTASY BOOKS IM LOSING MY MIND. ALSO OH MY GOD BON IVERS VOICE AT THE END HOLY FUCK!!!! THIS IS SO GOOD THIS IS ONE OF HER BEST DUETS IM LOSING MY SHIT this song is incredible I am in LOVE

My tears ricochet

TRACK 5 TRACK 5 TRACK 5 AHH I LOVE HOW DEEP HER VOICE GOES AND THE BACKGROUND VOCALS OMG. Oh my god the chorus I am in love, I love her voice sounds so raw on this album, we haven’t heard that in years IF I’M DEAD TO YOU WHY ARE YOU AT THE WAKE CURSING MY NAME?? OMG. This is fully giving me like fae woodland imagery I just love it, the vibes of it all! AS YOU BURY ME? OH MY GOD IS SHE A GHOST IM SCREAMING I LOVE THIS PERSPECTIVE. HOLY FUCK HOLY FUCK THE BRIDGE!!!!!!!! THE LINES ABOUT SCREAMING. THE BRIDGE IS UNBELIEVABLE AND THE WAY IT JUST FADES OUT I?

Mirrorball

Omg I love the vocal effects! This is full indie pop vibes I AM DIGGING IT. OH MY GOD THE CHORUS BROOO OK I OFFICIALLY LOVE THIS SONG IT’S EXACTLY THE KIND OF MUSIC I LIKE LISTENING TO. ‘Drunk as they watch my shadow, edges glisten’ oh wow the lyrics in this album are fucking otherworldly. Oh fuck this is agood bridge. I really cannot wait for all the analysis of this album by smarter people because I am not understanding BUT I AM LOVING IT. ALSO IDK WHAT A MIRRORBALL IS BUT I LOVE IT ANYWAY. How does she know such fancy words, I want her brain

Seven

‘I ht my peak at seven’ ok but same? HEYY SHE MENTIONED MOON AND SATURN I AM LIVINGGGGG. It’s so soft and wistful, those are the vibes of this album so far and I am really LOVING IT. PLEASE PICTURE ME IN THE WEEDS BEFORE I LEARNED CIVILITIY I USED TO SCREAM FEROCIOUSLY ANY TIME I WANTED?? IM YELLING I LOVEEEEE THESE LYRICS OH MY GOODNESS

August

ONCE AGAIN I LOVE THE VOCAL EFFECTS, I LOVE THE WAY HER VOICE SOUNDS. Omg the chorus is catchy! I love the way she sings ‘I can see’! OK THSI SONG IS ONE OF MY FAVOURITES I MEAN JUST LISTEN TO IT? I HAVE BEEN IN A STATE OF SHOCK SINCE LAST NIGHT BUT THIS IS MAGICAL ETHEREAL GROUNDBREAKING NEVER BEFORE SEEN INCREDIBLE PERFECT. OHH GOD THE BRIDGE IS COMNIG UP- YES IT’S AJFDSNAFKJSDFAF SHE WROTE THIS SONG IITS’ SO GOOD MISDFN JASDNFLJK SO MUCH FOR SUMMER LOVE AND SAYING US CAUSE U WERENT MINE TO LOSE!!!!! OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TAYLOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This is one fo her best songs ever EVER OMG AND THE BACKING VOCALS AT THE END AHH AND THE BEAT DROP TAYLOR WHAT THE FUCK YOU’VE OUTDONE YOURSELF A G A I N ??? IM NEVER GONNA RECOVER FROM THIS FUCK

This is me trying

Firstly, this song title is such a mood, especially this year. The beat in this song s so good - THIS SICK BEAT. AHH THERE IS THS COOL INSTRUMENT IS IT A VIOLIN IDK BUT I LOVE IT OMG. ‘THEY TOLD ME ALL OF MY CAGES WERE MENTAL SO I GOT WASTED LIKE ALL MY POTENTIAL AND MY WORDS SHOOT TO KILL WHEN I’M BAD I HAVE A LOT OF REGRETS ABOUT THAT II WAS SO AHEAD OF THE CURVE THAT THE CURVE BECAME A SPHERE I FELL BEHIND ON MY CLASS LATE UNTIL I ENDED UP HERE POURING OUT MY HEART TO A STRANGER BUT I DIDNT POUR THE WHISKEY! Oh god the ‘AT LEAST IM TRYING’ MAAAAM. THAT LAST VERSE FUCK FUCK FUF ASJDO FUCK THE BUILD UP. Listen I don’t know what the fuck this song is about but I do know that I love it I ADORE IT I FEEL LIKE EVERY SONG IS BETTER THAN THE LAST WHAT THE FUCK

Illicit affairs

I’m so intrigued by the title of this song! I LOVE the guitar in this song omg it’s so soft and wistful? IT DIES A MIIIILLIOON LITTLE TIMES……….. I love the little falsettos, that you picked out just for HIM! Take the words for what they are, a dwindling mercurial HIGH a drug that only worked the first few hundred times AND THAT’S THE THING ABOUT ILLICIT AFFAIRS AND CLANDESTINE MEETINGS AND STOLEN STARES they show their truth one single time BUT THEY LIE AND THEY LIE AND THEY LIE A MIILION LITTLE TIMES. LOOK AT THIS IDIOTIC FOOL THAT YOU MADE ME YOU TAUGHT ME A SECRET LANGUAGE I CAN’T SPEAK WITH ANYONE ELSE and you know damn well for you I would ruin myself a million little times. Holy fuck I have 0 words this is. Unbelievable it’s sunning I LOVE the bridge? I?

Invisible string

Oh lord I am not ready for this one. I love the way she sings the pre chorus! Were the CLUUUES I didn’t see—ee-ee. Omg this song is actually so cute. CHAINS AROUND MY DEMONS? WOOL TO BRAVE THE SEASONS? HOW THE FUCK DID SHE WRITE THIS IT’S SO GOOD IM SPEECHLESS also I LOVE the strings in this song, I love the production of this entire album tbh. It’s so chill and stripped back and it makes you focus on her vocals which sound soooo good.

Mad woman

TAYLOR SAID FUCK TAYLOR SAID FUCK TAYLOR SAID FUCK IM LIVINNGGGGG. ANYYWAY I LOOOVE THIS IM DIGGING ITTT I LOVE THE CHORUS EEEEK. the second verse omg I love the anger, the bitterness, you can HEAR it in her voice! It’s obvious that wanting me dead has already brought you two together??? EEK THE BRIDGE a spinster? What a shame she went mad… YOU MADE HER LIKE THAT OMG BITCH

Epiphany

Omg the intro build up - I love it. This sounds like a church choir? Is this about a soldier in war? What? It reminds me of Dunkirk or something omg. This is again so haunting, very slow and the piano only adds to the somber tone

Betty

WHO? IS? BETTY??????? Oh hey this is a gentle intro with this instrument that sounds familiar but idk what it is but I love it. I love the melody in this omg! SHE SAID FUCK AGAIN SHE SAID FUCK AGAI NOGAS JDFHLDSDKFLD TAYLORRRRRR WOULD YOU TELL ME TO GO FUCK MYSELF??? IM ONLY 17 I DON’T KNOW ANYTHING BUT I KNNOW MISS YOU! BITCH!!!!!!!! This is about like a lost first love! Anyway I really looove how her voice sounds in this and the melody…. I DREAMT OF YOU ALL SUMMER LONG OMG THE BRIDGE IS INCREDIBLE!!!!! Omg awww the only thing I wanna do is make it up to you so I showed up at your party?? AHH THE KEY CHANGE INI THE LAST CHORUS EEEEKKKKKK OMGGGGG WILL IT PATCH YOUR BROKEN WINGS I’M ONLY 17 IDK ANYTHING BUT I KNOW I MISS YOU OMG THE REFERENCE TO A CARDIGAN AGAIN!!!!!!!! AND THE STREETLIGHT! IM YELLING I LOVE THE PARALLELS AND THE MOTIFS and you can just hear the childish innocence int his song, I love it

Peace

This intro is SO COOL AND I AM VIBING HARD TO IT, I LOVE THE GUITAR IN THE BACKGROUND? Ok oh god I really like this one. The devil’s in the details but you got a friend in me I— THIS CHORUS IS AMAZING I ADORE IT. Omg this might be one of my favourites. Holy fuck I cannot get over how good the lyrics in this album are!!!!!!! I TALK SHIT WITH MY FRIENDS IT’S LIKE I’M WASTING YOUR HONOUR! Sit with you in the TRENCHES? Omg! WHAT IS THIS ABOUT I AM YELLING!!!!!!!!! ‘Clowns to the west’ oh hey that’s me. EEK THE SOFT KEYBOARD IN THE BACKGROUND - YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hoax

Last song? Ma’am I am not ready!!!!!!!!! THE PIANO IN THIS OMG. The chorus….. it’s beautiful……….. YOUR FAITHLESS LOVE’S THE ONLY HOAX I BELIEVE IN OH MY GODDDD. I’m yelling I love this so much. I loooove the angst of the chorus, the resignation that this is the one love she wants, even if it’s faithless! ‘You know I left a part of me back in New York’… THE LOUIS TOMLINSON PARALLEL DAFJKHASFKADS (I know you left a part of you in New York). ‘What you didd was just as hard’ omg what did he doooo?? MY KINGDOM COME UNDONE AHHHHH YOU HAVE BEATEN MY HEART! WHY IS THIS SONG SO BITTERSWEET IM ???????

#leanne speaks #folklore #folklore lb

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zombeamik · 6 years

Text

The Elementalists

okay so first of all The Elementalists is a great book!! i’m so glad we are confused lmao. so whoever wrote this book is amazing and i love them. anyways i’m glad we got sucked in through a mirror but yet idk why we ended up in the water instead of the mirror room?? unless that got explained and i missed it. ((btw our alter ego was hot until they decided to nearly kill me!! ugh i hate it when that happens lmao))

everyone is cute?? and i love the plant lady?? ((i feel bad bc i forgot what she was called and what her species is)) i mean sure i love humans but a human plant?? yes pls.

also yes i brought all of those magical orbs they are gonna come in handy, i’m guessing gray is wind, red is fire, blue is water, green is earth which is really cool even though they are one use but whatever

and i am cute but i couldn’t decide on which outfit bc they were both cute with my hair. anyways the brand/birthmark is cool, which is probably going to become important, it was at the end but it’s gonna be like everyone is gonna have darkness in them or around them and we gotta blast them with happiness and joy and sunshine!! which i am down for.

Americas Most Eligible

who would have thunk ivy would be in the top 2 YET IM MAD BC I DIDNT WANT ADAM TO QUIT BC HE MISSED OUT AGAIN UGH AND WHAT CARSON MAN WHAT THE FCK I TRUSTED YOU IVE NEVER FELT SO BETRAYED LIKE I EVEN GAVE HIM THE CHEAT LIST AND HE WAS SO WORRIED AND I WA SLIKE OK I CAN TRUST U THANKS CARSON AND NOW WHAT THE HELL man i am angry, that’s it i am done with this subject.

It Lives In The Woods

ok cool chapter glad I (MC) figured out the symbol was the same and man what the hell im gonna be mad if tom is one of those people in that cult, i mean i know he was playing video games, tbh i’d be doing that too but i don’t trust you just yet tom you are acting suspicious.

AND WHAT NED?? i saw you GET STABBED MULTIPLE TIMES DID I LIKE TRAVLE BAKC IN TIME?? WAS HE NOT DEAD AND JUST FAKED IT?? AND KILLED THE CULT MEMBERS IS THAT WHY THERE WAS BLOOD IN THE BASEMENT?!?? I SWEAR NED MAYBE HE HAS A TWIN?? OR MAYBE ITS THE MONSTER LIKE A SHAPE SHIFTING MONSTER?! THATD BE COOL

also i’m glad everyone gets a thing i’m trying to figure out who’s who on the paper unless everyone gets something different?? OK NO WAIT I GOT IT I STARED AT IT FOR A FEW MINUTES OK SO

Bird Cage; is Imogen bc she trapped bc of her mum ((i think but that’s her ok anyways))

Moth; could be cute mystery girl we don’t know the name of.

Lantern; is our MC ((i’m not sure why but maybe she’s the light for everyone to help them out of this hell))

Compass; could be Parker as it has a gun on the weapon side so i’m guessing police gun??

Eye; My best guess it Tom because of his glasses and yeah that all i got on the eye

If you have anything to say about this or agree/disagree let me know so i can change it or whatever lol we can work together!! Choices Mystery Team lmao

Perfect Match

Ok hayden looks CUTE and gross i did not want to see that chick who tried to steal tyler from abbie hmph. i was fine with seeing kaitlyns friend. and suck it brad i have three lovers i don’t need no more thanks.

anyways that cupcake AI presentation was SO CUTE THAT IT WAS GROSS AND I NEVER WANT TO SEE IT AGAIN

LAOS EXCUSE ME CELICE HAYDEN DIDNT HAVE A CHOICES I WOULD HURT SOMEONE IF THEY HURT SOMEONE I LOVE SO SHES BASICALLY HUMAN AND THERES NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT

#it lives beneath #ilb #perfect match #Choices #playchoices #ame #americas most eligble #the elementalists

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babyawacs · 4 years

Text

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and th e typing of it is the nutting? just thatthe heart dies from 69HDL 91LDL an d 91mgdl longtermsugar? I am Christian KISS BabyAWACS – Raw Independe nt Sophistication #THINKTANK + #INTEL #HELLHOLE #BLOG https://www.BabyAWACS .com/ [email protected] PHONE / FAX +493212 611 34 64 Helpful? Pay. S upport. Donnate. paypal.me/ChristianKiss ///// example: fortune: canth ey buy a magflight? @ap @reuters @bbc_whys @snowden @haaretzcom exam ple #gundeal discredited madeit into daysheeple govt tv. nothing is new about the trick /// framing here: wasit a mistake?nota mistake? : thege rmans?misuse?their doc system? as? control entity. its obvious and norway didnt lookatit before. /// as charged "immunisation is averted+nut tr icks asif no compensation is necessary ofwhatthey overtape allalong" @ap @r euters @bbc_whys @snowden @haaretzcom thebasisis intelhell +covered aswha t. whiletheir basis nutit doesnot undo compensate neutered mengeletricks //// repalced phone 1951 +ealrmypahtic then ehadimapct +ealrmypahtica ime 1954 /// dddddddddddddddrrowsyign headimapct bycockroach 1950 t hen ear whzatisit they donthave to justify each catapult and chamber g asing isitntit its howtoterrorise a pet in a cage w a y toooften then sneakintoit and pornit and thats the germanfix because they are germa n they deserve the inventions too itis hightreason togermany ifthey dont //// whatis the pro-word for idddiots that damageyou suffocate you to fi nd what a damaged transvestitefool you are soit saves em money #sudokus .@ law @law @laws @harvard_law @ap @reuters @bbc_whys @snowden @haaretzcom lawyers hedge abit that every crime the germans did,occured while they t ried to hedge every wet fart on hemmorides as severe mental illness allalo ng these tricks decoy who is charged daytime for what whilethey do what allalong while what is charged daytime decoyed with what allal ong //// is?nutting? intel hell a crime? and if staying damages h appen? staying damages they overtape and know? staying damamges they ov ertape and know c h a r g e d d a y t i m e? adds damages d u r i n g n utting rapes and adds pedo sexual assaults during nutting for charging it daytime andifits based on averted formality immunisation caused as botch? but immunised the rapers? from angle to angle it gets german german german and really german itsjust the part of it what youwanna pokein? poisons ? brought to clowncops inte firstplace whilethey shu ffle more harms? yomama from a criminally insane family while they dothe same with her? oh whoopsie it died barely averting the worst regularly? prostitute of the land and the worstpaid ever we set it up and breach ba rricades and set himup to after prep and reinstall barricades because wer e german nice? what aspects of this mess doyouwan to pokein? he s howers and feeds the cat but its not... .. .. aeh .. . .. aaadunno cant we .. ssssssex! pedo! sex! because he is aeh a t r a n s v e s t i t e and I am Christia n KISS BabyAWACS – Raw Independent Sophistication #THINKTANK + #INTEL #HEL LHOLE #BLOG https://www.BabyAWACS.com/ [email protected] PHONE / FAX +493212 611 34 64 Helpful? Pay. Support. Donnate. paypal.me/ChristianKiss

.@law @law @laws @harvard_law @lawyercom @ap @reuters @bbc_whys @snowd en @haaretzcom they are g e r m a ns they aeh germancure aeh nervous guts from crapping ocne a day or twice aday after subdue to t r y i n g t o fourtimes a day woopsie if mysteriously the organs die and they gladly kill support for it to resubdue as poi songas every chow irradiate and xraybeam and terror cockroachdrug spoil fi lters it is g e r m a n y its devious bbbbbbbbbbbbbbastardmonsters squared cubed with victimb lame and no why was something you got it d e e d typed //// th e germans usually poisongased arbitraritly that shifted to pathogengasi ng inthe chamber does noone wonder evenabout the co2 specialmix killtri cks inteh values in air vent throughput thatthey isntalled the gas valves intothe freshair channel above window plants because itis fres h throughput a n d a bubble of ionised air this year with minimal e xposure outside to people but rigorous washing after grocerystore and out side including pullover change phone cleaning they got pathogen loads and co2 values and nox values and interoxide exchange murdertricks and ars enide values and such of which use the chance notarstamp it pu blish it it is not just deedtyped itis f a c t u a l i t y deedtyped and as typical intel murder tricks hedged stigmas typical damages on counterfactual basis instead see if temperature (!)because its airflus h through can be nutted on what them gas allalong whcih allknow allalo ng asits daycharged allalong phone replace 1948 during mail is //// #teeth #example checkalso iftgermans were again onthe teeth the lowlef t outest one doesnt addup again its likely facebone teethbonemess ona fo rmerfix they always dothese things andimstuck withthe day damamge the 12tooth isthesame itwas fixed then faceboneteethbonemess february or ap ril redmamged it then it infected on rootcanal toothbase the facebone teethbonemesses were from experiment surgeries 2004 with cheap klammern s on but isntead fixed once remessed re remessed and re re remessed itis healthinsurance charged sothe teethdamamges the a b s c e n c e of oth er problems on teethflesh for tenyears the ring around which teeth were d amaged by their very own assessment their own assessment each front top teeth namely a big ring aroudn it a f t e r this they suddenly dr illed the outerlow ones too whihc were n o t highlighted as damamged in their very own assessment allofthe mess is a big big big fuckup of day damages based on r e a l d e a l harm forinstance verfassungsschutz installs a tooth inthe basis of leftlow in rubbertitts which occasionally injured the toothflesh then overtaped it the teeth scans are an (!)all einstellungsmerkmal they identify people by teeth scans and implant scans a nd such notjust chips the mmwaves are looooong time around inthe real deal the radio spectroscopy knew allalong their own mix as what i broug ht the cops a n d threw intothe mailbox to opcw and embassies //// c hildfoolmess 311 slapemdown squeeze em destroy gasvalves itisnot bigd eal germans shuffle stigmas because itis intel itis whichtrickworksrightn ow decoys that their government+criminal timecontrolsystem is daytimecha rged quells fortune access selfhelp shuffles murder tricks and pedo orgie s tomake guilty if pathologisationsticks its batshitnuts or cook forehead momfool if pervert itspedoorgies if hooker oftheland its hookersmear an dabuse if hatenut hitler terror threat its that if teenieweeenie turnba ckclock trick its taht because itis intel daytimecharged germangovt+ti mecontrolsystem itis which trick works thistime find foot aim catapulte r usually suffocatekilltrickssssuffocate cockroach ondamamgedheart 230 sq ueeze cautionwithsupport chekcifits gaser above only pieceof crap its like cockroaches damage moelst rape and see ifthey can reinterpet sth that youre guilty for t h e i r crimes this is mildsafe while youfight not to die on a hearttrick oftheirs repeated cockroaches ihate em //// bra inwave scissor nanooilantenna ornot readsout every thought realtime. @doc @doctors @redcross @who @harvard why can fools get away with trick fram ing priming fear fears uncontrolledfears p a n i c while the type is bomb out suffocator gaser jailassmolester in a n g e r victimisation how is it not o b v i o u s the criminal german govt with its timecontrol accomplices shuffled harms shuffl ed proxies quelled selfhelp got daytimecharged forthe monstrosities they commit realtime and there on shuffled a n y e v e r ysingle dirty trick th ey had to quell it as immunisation which isnt even new the first thi ng snowden expected was docification the gundeal bureacrat got intothei r realdeal- got docified – rehabilitated in daytime govt tv a miracle o n fresh leadership freshbroom miracle maybe vonderleyen but its not ne w? ******* how do the germans get away with misusing docifica tion for control and quell of their sins their german monstrosities th ey a r e daytime charged they quelledit and corner it to nutting while e fforting h e a r t k i l l and xraybeam and arbitrariy hideousmix trick n ot one unspoiled meal ******* catapult terror is just as spam as int el roofhole gasing deed typed andthefix: to either batshit nutsnesss: pedo orgies pedo sexual assault with minors dozens a day sometimes after daytimecharging it uptothis januar eu humanrights 3781/20 since 2800/10 6ar50/19local in d-74821 //// good doctors dont try to h avebeenright nomatter what the facts are and sure not if setup by a crimi nal system and damnsure not when everything thats happening is f a r f ar f a r m o r e relev ant than any cherrypicked template shitball throw bum lidokain atit or find the cockroach that intel roofhole gases and murder beam radartricks into heart and shutsdown digestive system+stomach and catapults intero xide exchange cellsuffocators into heart wait its deedtyped? and th e typing of it is the nutting? just thatthe heart dies from 69HDL 91LDL an d 91mgdl longtermsugar? I am Christian KISS BabyAWACS – Raw Independe nt Sophistication #THINKTANK + #INTEL #HELLHOLE #BLOG https://www.BabyAWACS .com/ [email protected] PHONE / FAX +493212 611 34 64 Helpful? Pay. S upport. Donnate. paypal.me/ChristianKiss ///// example: fortune: canth ey buy a magflight? @ap @reuters @bbc_whys @snowden @haaretzcom exam ple #gundeal discredited madeit into daysheeple govt tv. nothing is new about the trick /// framing here: wasit a mistake?nota mistake? : thege rmans?misuse?their doc system? as? control entity. its obvious and norway didnt lookatit before. /// as charged “immunisation is averted+nut tr icks asif no compensation is necessary ofwhatthey overtape allalong” @ap @r euters @bbc_whys @snowden @haaretzcom thebasisis intelhell +covered aswha t. whiletheir basis nutit doesnot undo compensate neutered mengeletricks //// repalced phone 1951 +ealrmypahtic then ehadimapct +ealrmypahtica ime 1954 /// dddddddddddddddrrowsyign headimapct bycockroach 1950 t hen ear whzatisit they donthave to justify each catapult and chamber g asing isitntit its howtoterrorise a pet in a cage w a y toooften then sneakintoit and pornit and thats the germanfix because they are germa n they deserve the inventions too itis hightreason togermany ifthey dont //// whatis the pro-word for idddiots that damageyou suffocate you to fi nd what a damaged transvestitefool you are soit saves em money #sudokus .@ law @law @laws @harvard_law @ap @reuters @bbc_whys @snowden @haaretzcom lawyers hedge abit that every crime the germans did,occured while they t ried to hedge every wet fart on hemmorides as severe mental illness allalo ng these tricks decoy who is charged daytime for what whilethey do what allalong while what is charged daytime decoyed with what allal ong //// is?nutting? intel hell a crime? and if staying damages h appen? staying damages they overtape and know? staying damamges they ov ertape and know c h a r g e d d a y t i m e? adds damages d u r i n g n utting rapes and adds pedo sexual assaults during nutting for charging it daytime andifits based on averted formality immunisation caused as botch? but immunised the rapers? from angle to angle it gets german german german and really german itsjust the part of it what youwanna pokein? poisons ? brought to clowncops inte firstplace whilethey shu ffle more harms? yomama from a criminally insane family while they dothe same with her? oh whoopsie it died barely averting the worst regularly? prostitute of the land and the worstpaid ever we set it up and breach ba rricades and set himup to after prep and reinstall barricades because wer e german nice? what aspects of this mess doyouwan to pokein? he s howers and feeds the cat but its not… .. .. aeh .. . .. aaadunno cant we .. ssssssex! pedo! sex! because he is aeh a t r a n s v e s t i t e and I am Christia n KISS BabyAWACS – Raw Independent Sophistication #THINKTANK + #INTEL #HEL LHOLE #BLOG https://www.BabyAWACS.com/ [email protected] PHONE / FAX +493212 611 34 64 Helpful? Pay. Support. Donnate. paypal.me/ChristianKiss

.@law @law @laws @harvard_law @lawyercom @ap @reuters @bbc_whys @snowden @haaretzcom

they are g e r m a ns

they aeh germancure aeh nervous guts from crapping ocne a day or twice aday after subdue

to t r y i n g

t o

fourtimes a day

woopsie if mysteriously theorgans die

and they gladly kill support for it to resubdue

as poisongas every chow irradiate and xraybeam and terror cockroachdrug spoil…

View On WordPress

#BLOG #example #gundeal #HELLHOLE #intel #sudokus #teeth #THINKTANK

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iloveleee · 4 years

Text

Part 2: Loki cheated on you

Warning, depression, reader thinking she is worthless heartbreak..etc

U lay in the hospital , loki was beside u as were steve , natasha, tony, Clint Wanda bucky and pietro( he is alive u saved him in the battle being an avenger ur self)(( let's say that u guys are super close and u have helped every one of them in times of need))

" yn, ur awake " shouted tony and the whole team proceeded to hug u. " why yn? Why relapse?? I thought u stopped all this bullshit once we joined the avengers" said nat. " u scared us" whispered steve. Loki could not look u in the eye, he only held ur hand softly.

" oh I did stop, I just was hungry and had a nightmare, so I came out and I saw the blade and couldn't stop my self , I'm fine really" u lied, u hated being weak but it did hurt, it broke ur heart that loki, loki who I trusted with everything cheated on u and u were so weak and dependent that u couldn't leave him."

" that's bullshit, guys can u leave me and wanda wanna talk to yn alone" nat said, loki didnt leave only made an illusion to leave. After being together for 4 yrs u knew most of his tricks, somehow u missed the cheating one. U let him stay

" now spill" said wanda as they both sat on either edges of ur bed

U couldn't hold it in" LOKI CHEATED ON ME" U started sobbing as wanda and nat, hugged u , completely in shock.

" oh yn why would loki do that? That piece of shit, how could stand to be in the same room, I'll tell him to leave" nat stood up as I stopped her." No, we r still together"

" why, what?? He cheated tho"

" ik but I m not enough I've never been for anyone and that's not his fault"

" there r better men"

" there might be, but I'm not strong enough to leave him"

" why yn why?"

" cause I love him too much, okay? He ...he ..is my everything. He shoos the nightmares and makes me feel safe, I havent felt safe ever before. My parents were jerks , hydra was a jerk, and when I finally escaped, everyone I knew was dead, killed by hydra. With loki I feel safe and calm. And I love him , his eyes smile,dimples, mischief, sweet nothings, his everything. I see my god in him." U were sobbing and sobbing but u knew, u would always love him.

In the corner of ur eye, u saw loki , crying too, whispering again and again

" I'm sorry, I'm so sorry"

For the next few days everything was normal, except u lost color . The bright girl who danced thru everythiNg in life and sang always her worries. Except u didnt have it in u.

U hated urself for being so weak , yet so much in love. Loki did everything to make it up to u. He wore a t shirt saying' I belong to yn , if u stare at me ,I will stab u and then make u kneel in front of her' he brought flowers and chocolates with hearts on them. But u didnt eat the chocolates u didnt eat anything. He took care of ur wounds , would be careful to cage u in his arms when sleeping and would not let u out of his sight. He hated seeing u like this but what could he say? This was all his fault, almost 5yrs down the drain.

One day u were sitting when it started raining. No matter what happens u love rain too much.In those months , u would run in the rain with ur frnds would forget all ur worries and pain. So u went out and in know time u were singing umbrella while crying and dancing in the rain as u fell to the ground. What were u doing? This is not u . Ur too strong, u just needed a time away. I sent a message to ur old friend, peter quill.

" Loki loki?"

" yes honey ?"

" I'm going, I'm going to guard the universe, I'll be back in a few years, but we have our immortal lives so a few yrs is nothing. I'm not breaking up I'm taking a small break. I just want to figure everything out . I'll see u soon" you looked so brave , ur eyes shining for the first time in 3 weeks. There was a space ship waiting outside, with peter drax and rocket.

It killed loki, but he had to do this. He wont let u go grey , he agreed . In return u gave him ur pendant which ur grandma gave to u when u were 6.

" I will be back my love" loki saw u fly away far far away with his heart.

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joestrummen · 7 years

Text

Watching X-Men

It feels narcissistic to post liveblogs a lot of the time I watch stuff, but then even when I had no friends I used to write these things in me diary. I was a sad kid...

Did I learn about evolution from X-Men I stg

Damn this labour camp scene used to fuck me up (I remember it like I used to watch it over and over)

If the presentation of powers is brought on by traumatic events what the fuck happened to Rogue (was kissing that guy the first time it happened?) (Jean said it was heightened emotion, maybe she was just turned on...)

y i k e s I forgot about mutant registration

You think Patrick Stewart hasn't aged and then you see him from ten years ago and damn he had dark eyebrows and smooth skin

Did Charles just look in Magneto's brain? I thought he agreed not to do that?

YEA

BRING ME THE CAGE FIIIIGHTINNNN

MNMNMNMNMN

Oh my God Rogue is so thirsty X'D

I just realised my ultimate dream in life is to impress Wolverine in a cage fight

[head in hands] they put in clanking sound effects when wolverine hit the other guy why did the year 2000 have to happen to good films

if han solo is a butch icon can logan be one too i stg these bootcut jeans, the big brown cowboy leather belt, the ... whatever the fuck his hair is im wilding

im literally losing my shit every time he's on screen im fucking dying he's in that leather jacket that cigar end me END ME

two queers clocking each other in a shitty dive bar YES

wolverine's life as a metaphor for the cycle of poverty that being queer traps you in

(and one thing that mutants and queers have that jewish people don't is ostracision for their family, which can have impacts for isolation and poverty) (correct me if i'm wrong)

wolverine dresses like a dyke im losing my shit

can someone explain to me what is the fuck wolverine's hair

omfg he's such a grumpy goofball

I always loved Rogue's magicka coat

She is fucking wild omfg u chase that man omfg

being like fuck off im not helping, driving away 50m, and then being compelled to stop is Everything I Look For In A Character (am i being like a reylo like if he hadnt she would have straight up died idk)

and now he's feeding her killlll me

I’m getting kinda philosophical about how I so instinctively loved the tropes in this film and they are STILL sending me wild like what in fresh biological determinism is this

i cant deal wiht every single got damn second between wolv and rogue every inch of me is ascending to a higher plane of id

this film is made of literally every non-sexual kink ive ever had i cant deal with this not at all

uggggghghghghghghgh he was being all uncaring but he fed her and turned on the heater even though she didnt complain about the cold and when she flinched when he nearly touched her he reassured her and now he just told her his name im fuckin dyin larry

wow waking up in that hospital must not have been a fun flashback like experience for wolverine he must fucking hate hospitals

HOly Shit Charles speaking directly into his head while he's that freaked the fuck out is NOt Helping the situation

uggggghhhh oh my god Charles 6000% sees Logan like a son end my entire body I don't neeeed this Wolv and Rogue is bad enough fuuuck

also lol @ Charles holding a supervision what a Cambs boy

oh my god baby logan is only 15 years old

and i stg if charles promised not to look in people's heads because he is all up in logan's business

oh shit add amnesia to the list

wolverine is so protective of rogue enddd me

BOBBY HOW LONG DID IT TAKE YOU TO PERFECT MAKING AN ICE ROSE LIKE WHAT A PLAYA HE IS RIGHT IN THERE

'when i was 17 i met a young man named erik lensherr. he too had an unusual power' this is literally a description of meeting the first other gay man in your life (and/or falling for them)

im still unsure about magneto as a radical activist (is that the word)

lol can i blame this on the troubles again. i cant find anyone who's activism incites and escalates violence to be a good or productive thing.

I love that Jean Grey is the kind of woman that Logan is into

WHO wrROTE the flirting in this film they are all creeps omfg

If Logan is in a different timeline then I could correct his behaviour to be actually like a radical activist, though that would take some research

Wtf Charles theyre talking about a register it would be exactly like getting a number tattooed on your forearm

McKellen is reeeally giving me a Ben Whishaw vibe

If Magneto is a good guy why didn't he just recruit her instead of kidnapping and planning to kill her. Wouldn't it be much more fascinating if he had recruited her. Maybe in the fix it timeline he did.

'If you were really so righteous, it'd be you in that thing.' too right wolv

awwwww wolverine you lil self sacrificing fluff ball

So in the fix it verse I'll have Wolverine blame Magneto for Rogue's death or something and Magneto will be like she came by choice and wolv will be like she was fifteen

#watching xmen #liveblog

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floramodus-archive · 7 years

Text

==> Flora: Confess

floramodus raddddia i know im like

floramodus half hammered and the past 24 hours hasnt helped me much as a mentally stable individual but you know what? fuck it man i love you and not in a friend way though you are! one of my closest friends i just i love you alot romantically youre a hellfire in the arctic and i love you

tlmetravel im sure you think you do, sweets its the alcohol im not angry at you for relapsing, as a side reminder for later need help sobering up?

floramodus i need help for you to take me serious for once.

tlmetravel i am

tlmetravel im very serious about you needing to sober up

floramodus im already half sober because dean hasnt let me have anymore since he got home the point is: im not saying anything because im drunk. im not clinging to you because im drunk. i just had to watch my fiancee die, again, in full detail. im not saying these things out of of my ass, aradia, i love you.

tlmetravel you had to see that? on valentines day?

floramodus i made a choice to find the answer and i did, timing aside.

tlmetravel im proud of you for it im also sorry you had to see it oh, my poor girl, how you must feel happiness absent so strongly

floramodus ///I HATE HER MOIRA

tlmetravel //:)c

floramodus your avoiding the main topic and at this point i want dean to leave so i can go get moonshine because whats the point aradia. whats the point in dancing around it instead of telling me cold turkey? what do you gain from seeing me falter

tlmetravel im not trying to dance around it so much as give you the opportunity to take it back once youre more clear headed

floramodus thats almost painfully hilarous?

tlmetravel why is that?

floramodus because once again you arent taking me serious and i knew it would be this way for months. i knew sober or drunk youd find a way to make me regret speaking

tlmetravel im sorry if i have im just not sure what you want me to say

floramodus is it worth pursueing or am i barking up the wrong tree?

tlmetravel you have such a penchant for making yourself unhappy youve already dealt with enough serious, life altering topics think you might want to give it a rest before tackling this one give yourself a break

floramodus love in general? or love with you?

tlmetravel love in general is life altering

floramodus guess what! cock a doodle do my life is altered always! thats how we exist! thats how we keep sane! if you want to say no thanks than do it aradia ive been through worse.

tlmetravel you have thats why im not letting you have this discussion right now or make it into something trivial this is a battle for another day go to bed, flo

floramodus im not sleeping till you give me an answer i can sleep with

tlmetravel you are so endlessly cruel to yourself

floramodus i can sit on this couch all night and all day and die again and gain radia.

tlmetravel you do realize youre just proving my point

floramodus i dont care ///i typed that so loud every dog in my moms house just went off

tlmetravel regardless, im not what youve mistaken me for, flo im just happy and i think you just want to be happy too you have the right to be, at any rate //fck

floramodus just say it ///FUCK THEI R SCREAMING AND I PRESSED ENTER BUT ANYWAY

tlmetravel are you really so deluded as to think that just because /you/ dont care, the rest of us get a free pass as well? that well turn a blind eye to your safety breaches just because you throw a tantrum? you have /got/ to stop doing this to yourself you have /got/ to stop treating your life and everything in it with this kind of dangerous levity so no! you arent getting an answer! youre not getting anything until you tuck yourself in and let yourself /rest/ before taking on any more

floramodus ///I THOUGHT THat said fuck

tlmetravel //let dolly say fyck

floramodus well i guess this couch will be cozy while i sit here awake for as long as it takes

tlmetravel you will Not use your well-being as emotional blackmail not against me dave might let you and the rest of your friends might but you dont get to press on my moral values because /i have none/ and you will sit, and you will rot, and it will be for nothing at all

floramodus ///tfw aradia even makes me, the mun, feel like a piece of shit i love her

tlmetravel until you realize its pointless and let yourself out of this cage youve built out of whatever survivors guilt you brought back with you

tlmetravel //shes amoral and ppl forget and I love

floramodus you may have no moral values but ill tell you what i have thats less than that? the fucks i give about my place in the universe. i spent 7 years of my life questioning my existence to lose that existence and you know? i dont fucking care anymore. my life is mine to burn ///i like how u posted that and i sent the same screenshot 2 seconds earlier to joseph cause im living

tlmetravel //do u know how. pissed shed be at dave if she knew he let her go through w those amputation experiments? not v much bc shes incapable of being angry at him but shed Want to be and I,

floramodus ///asdfghjk

tlmetravel you dont get to play with fire just because you dont know what to do with yourself. you dont get to use your own life as a punching bag for your whims you dont get to keep expecting for these bridges to go up in flames when so many of us love you you dont get to look at love and call us stupid

floramodus i never even said any of you were stupid

tlmetravel then why do you keep treating us like we are

tlmetravel like well let this slide if youre loud enough

floramodus im not treating you guys anymore than the best i can ! its not my fault you take my life so personal! what do expect of me? to sit in a goddamn corner and suckle vitamins for the rest of my immortal days?

tlmetravel youre our /friend/! itll always be personal for us

tlmetravel wed destroy anyone who hurt you but, to our great despair, the only one keen on hurting you is /you/

floramodus im not hurting myself im doing what nature and common sense dictate

tlmetravel oh thats rich no, you are purposely doing what hurts you the most out of whatever misguided sense of survivors guilt but guess what none of it will make you feel better and it sure as Hell doesnt make us feel good

floramodus guess fucking what! the clouds told me bec lives! im doing something right with my life! even if i have to cleave my goddamn skull in!!! two!!!

tlmetravel youre making accomplices out of innocent people by not letting them help

floramodus you arent scientists. you arent magicians.

tlmetravel you are actively tying their hands behind their back because they love you too much to tell you any of this i dont care, flora and i dont pretend to and i wont pretend to just the same as you so blatantly dont care about /my/ good friend, i dont care about yours i dont give a flying fuck if your dog lives

tlmetravel non gratum anus rodentum it only matters to us because it matters to you

floramodus ///the acid fucking crashed my laptop

tlmetravel and your high-brow, dr frankenstein, 'oh im a scientist you wouldnt understand' act is not pulling the wool over anyones eyes youre self destructive bec just gives you an excuse to con us out of doing anything about it //God ™

floramodus //im not responding until tumblr boots back up cause she is nuclear moira

tlmetravel //good im not saying you dont honestly care for bec im saying he also doubles as a handy excuse

floramodus so what do you expect me to fucking do. how do you expect me to react to you saying the last goal i have in life is just that, a worthless goal. do you expect me to be gratify? do you expect to graciously bow to your ancient wisdom and sit in a bumbo and learn how to be "healthy" again for the sake of comfort.

tlmetravel yes

floramodus your goddamn right im self destructive i wont hesitant to tear my self apart for any goal worth it what are you gonna do about it? be content your fucking right? humanity believe a nuclear bomb would kill us all but that didnt stop them and it wont stop me

tlmetravel or you could just treat yourself as a tool, a means to an end, because god forbid you see yourself as a person, because you /know/ deep down that how you treat yourself? isnt how you should treat a person humanity really isnt the pinnacle of reason nor does humanity interest me, were talking about /you/

floramodus im human in theory but guess what? im not a person. im a god, a means of survival

tlmetravel does that flawed rhetoric make you sleep at night at least? because i really wish it would

tlmetravel because its good for absolutely /nothing/ else

floramodus i wasnt put on this earth to be comfortable ive been living in gunpowder since i was 6

tlmetravel you really dont want to start a sob story competition with me trust me you know why id be afraid, if you did love me?

floramodus despite my urge to tell you to shove it back in the textbook you crawled out of ill play your game. why

tlmetravel because youd put me above yourself and im historically against pedestals its a frightening thing to love someone who would damn herself in a second without looking over her shoulder death doesn't just happen to you, icarus, it happens to everyone around you your wounds are not just your own though they sting you most

floramodus icarus had one life. i have infinity

tlmetravel i dont care each one of your lives is as precious to us as if it were your last just because you /can/ doesnt mean you /should/ by all means, go on with this madness, tear yourself limb for limb if your heart is really in it just dont expect me to be quiet about it in fact, place no expectations on me at all hellfire, you called me hellfire, indeed

floramodus let he who has the match wick the bridge in flames

#ooc #logs archived #long /#blood /#suicide /#self harm /#gore /#drdp /?#ask to tag #plot #alcohol /#tlmetravel

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gone-girlllllll · 6 years

Text

WHY

I question why I have this bursting anger inside of me yet when it’s late and I’m doing nothing but thinking and my mind crosses to my mum and yet of course my brother.

I feel like this profile is a way I can actually get my feelings out when I have no other place to turn to. I don’t want to ambush people with these horrible thoughts, nobody will understand.

IM SO ANGRY.

After my older brother killed himself when he was 18, my life basically was starting. I got to about 10 and my mum finally told me what had happened to him and since about 15 all I’ve been doing is thinking of it. I’m sorry I can’t really remember you and I’m sorry I’m angry at you and I’m sorry I don’t understand why you did it.

But I just can’t help but think IF ONLY YOU saw the consequence from that one action u made at the age of 18, 18! I’m 18 and I don’t know how anyone could ever make a drastic decision like that, how does someone so young believe that the only way out of sadness or a tough time in life is to take their own.

HOW SELFISH, n yet again I’m sorry for saying that. I feel so guilty I think this way and I know that if anybody ever in my family seen this they’d hate me and think I’m a bad person and maybe I am but in my eyes so are you.

You have no idea the shitness you’ve brought to this family, the hurt. Why couldn’t you of just kept your head up, WAITED. Time heals everything, well they say, but with mum clearly not. But in my eyes I believe it can if you’re willing to try and if you’re strong enough to let it. Don’t dwell, move on?

If you’d only of waited or spoke to someone, someone could of opened your eyes to what the world could of gave you. What I could of. I wish I was old enough to see your hurt, I mean I was only 3. I only I was at this point I am now, I could of helped. I wish I did and I’m sorry for that. IM SORRY THAT SOMETHING SO SHIT MADE YOU FEEL LIKE YOU HAD TO LEAVE. Leave everything, the world, life, family, friends but most importantly right now MUM.

I can’t stop crying at these stupid thoughts but I can’t get them out of my head. Suicide is shit and horrible but don’t get me wrong I’ve thought about it before too but that was me being a stupid child. I grew out of it and I wish you would of too.

I want to know what possessed you to do it, why. What could of ever killed your kind, loving heart. Mum told me how amazing you were with me and everyone that knew you talks about you to me with kind words so why. HOW DID NOBODY notice? How did you hide it so well? Why didn’t you talk to anybody? Maybe you did, if so who? Why didn’t they stop you? WHY DID NOBODY TELL YOU HOW AMAZING THIS WORLD COULD BE if only you let it?

This hurts me to write all this but at this moment I don’t know what else to do or rely on. I have this anger inside of me where I want to scream, hit things but I can’t. It’s 12pm and I can’t get you or mum out of my brain.

In my eyes, because of you when I think of mum I get angry. It angers me she doesn’t do things normal mums should do. I get she gives me the WORLD in the sense of giving through £££ or cleaning, or doing things for me. Which is probably only to waste more time of her days. I personally think she’s counting down the days until she’s dead herself. She told me herself she might as well be dead years ago, that’s never left my head either. What mum would ever say that to her young child, and I also think YOU caused that.

Selfish teenage boy, with problems only suicide could solve. Did you ever think of how it would effect your mum, your brothers, your baby sister. You must of, So why DIDNT THAT STOP YOU. Everyday mum wakes up thinking or life as another depressing day ahead. I know she does, I can see it in her. She’s NEVER happy, I can actually say confidentially I can’t remember the last time she’s laughed out loud. How sad is that?

Now I’m 18, I feel as though I’m finally starting to understand life. She angers me everyday I see her, the way she anxiously walks about the house trying her best to find things to do and keep her mind off doing NOTHING but being sad. You spill a drop out water, she shouts. You drop a remote and she hears something fall, she will shout. She’s an angry soul waiting to burst because of you. She’s depressed, lonely and closed, because of you. She has to see a therapist to finally open up in some way to someone, which I don’t think she does to anybody else. She can’t spit out her words to anyone, she’s a closed book. I’m 18 and I can also say I don’t actually know my mum.

As I’ve grown up, we’ve slowly grown apart, I’ve noticed her anger and sadness. She way she goes about life and it makes me angry. I can’t spend more than 20 minutes in her company without wanting to rip my hair out. It angers me how she can’t keep a conversation going with her own daughter, it angers me she never makes the effort to get to know me or anything that happens in my life. Ive just come back from uni after a month, she said she missed me. First car ride, the first time she seen me, was awkward silence, no words spoke, no how’s uni. SHE DOES NOT CARE.

BECAUSE OF YOU SHE CARES ABOUT FUCK ALL apart from the fact you are gone and YOUVE Crushed her heart into pieces. I wish you knew that, I wish you could see it the way all of US have to. And yet, none of us can do anything about it.

I remember when she said I wish I had no kids. She said I was exactly like tommy after he stressed her out with this issues a year ago. I’m a disappointment to her no matter what I do or say. I remember when I got my A level results, I seen every other parent go wild make their kid feel like they are on top of the world, special. I got a simple well done. I felt nothing. No meal, no celebration, but again why would she do that. It’s only some stupid results On a piece of paper to her now I’m sure.

There’s no happiness, except for when Mia came into the world. She’s a distraction from her loneliness that’s eating her up. Mia’s happiness is hers. But yet Mia is too clueless to see the sadness in her, like I was.

I want that relationship with my mum where I can trust her, spend time with her, make memories with her, gossip about stupid things, that mother daughter relationship everyone wants. I wonder if I’d of got that if you didn’t kill yourself. I wonder if she’d be happy, if she’d actually be proud of me, be the woman to jump about at my stupid A level grades, take me on random dinners cause she’d be confident like that. Instead she can’t really leave the house without feeling anxiety. She’s like a hamster trapped in a cage, cage being from the shops, doctor, our house, nain’s flat, aunty carols and the houses she cleans. Where else does she go? NOWHERE. She hates seeing people, she hates conversation, she’s become so small in herself she can’t even do that, and yet all I think i I wonder if she did before you.

I seen a picture of her once out getting wrecked with her friends and I couldn’t get over it. MY MUM OUT ACTUALLY HAVING FUN, obviously that was before you did what you did. She doesn’t even speak to them friends anymore, only aunty carol. I’m sure if aunty Carol stopped overly making effort with her she’d be out of her life too. I again feel angry at myself and guilty I think this way but I can’t get it out of my head.

My mum is basically dead but alive, she’s not actually here on Earth, she’s floating. I doubt she’s even scared to die, she’s ready.

You ruined her life from the minute you stepped off that chair, which can I mention WHY THERE. So close to home and comfort, the place your friends learnt to love. YOU NOT ONLY FUCKED IT BY DOING IT BUT so selfishly did it in a place where memories were made and shared. And now I bet when anyone thinks of that place they think of you. If only you knew that each time she drove she’d have to go the long way round so she wouldn’t pass that field. If only you knew that when my friends would go there, traditionally making it the go to place for teens in valley to get around and be piss heads n free n smoke I had to lie to mum, I was made to feel guilty and I still do. I like to think of that place as a way of being close to you in some way, although you did what you did. Before that you went there and made happy memories with the people you cared about, that’s what I do when I’m there.

I remember one Time I went there when I first started trying drugs. I sat alone, fucked On a pill and thought of you. I went for a walk alone ( I’m scared of the dark but went anyway) and I tried to speak to you, hoping to feel some sort of connection. I wish I could actually speak to you in person.

Maybe if you didn’t kill you self this whole family would be close and happy, that’s all I could wish for. Maybe me and my brothers would be close and if a boy would mess me around you’d make sure they’d stick up for me too like hopefully you would of. I feel no sense of security now. I have me and nobody else. They don’t know me, nobody in this family knows anyone. We are all alone, we keep everything to ourselves, we trust nobody. Everything that is shit in my ( ours) family, I blame you. I bet life would be so different. Again I know if anybody ever in this family seen this they’d hate me but I’m not ready to forgive you. I might of forgotten you, which I’m sorry for but there’s a reminder of you everytime I’m in this house, or with this family. It’s just you.

I’m sorry for how I feel and I’m sorry for writing it on this but I don’t know what else to do. My diary is in Liverpool and I’m at home in bed crying. I wanted to sleep an hour ago cause I have a shit ton of uni work that needs to be done but I guess I’m up crying about you, no hard feelings. X

I wish this could all just blow away and you’d be here again and everything would be perfect. I know perfect isn’t possible but to see a smile on my mums face everyday, to hear her laugh, to see our family CLOSE, to feel like I was happy in my family and not alone would actually be perfect to me.

But it can’t and that’s because of you. X

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