#Whoops I fell down and now I ship it lols

[giggly-squiggily]

*me double checking that Fire Force is still on your fandoms list bc it's been a minute and a half*

YEEET REQUESTS!! I'm so excited to see them open again! Also I really hope you're hanging in there. I've been thinking of you as you go through this difficult time, my friend. 💖

*drumroll* OK OK so I've been having serious Fire Force brainrot this past week (I really gotta rewatch it, I love that show 🔥), so I come to you with a humble request for lee!shinra and ler!tamaki (the lucky lecher lure gal, bc I always get her and maki mixed up 😅)

I don't have a ton of specifics but the general idea is that Shinra absolutely cannot function when she tickles him; he gets so flustered he doesn't know whether to fight back or just let it happen 😂 (though I do hc that he would at least be coherent enough to cover his eyes in case her lure kicks in to protect her modesty, which only makes him more vulnerable to tickles and - you get the idea 😈)

Only if you want, as always, my friend! Can't wait to see what you do with this prompt if you decide to take it!! AND HAPPY FALLLLL I'M SO EXCITED FOR COOLER WEATHER!! 🍂🍂🍂

AHH NYM! *running jump hug* I'm so glad to hear from you! :D And with a Fire Force request HELLO? *squeals* God I haven't written for these guys in so long; this was so refreshing and lovely! (And girl SAME!!! It's their hair I swear- they both have the same dark put up look and face akljrekarjkejrj)

Oh my god Lee!Shinra my BELOVED! I've gotcha covered, girl! (got a little shippy at the end whoops! My hopeless romantic side; it gets the best of me lols) This was so fun to write, and I hope you like it! :D (AND YES LETS GO FALL!!!!)

In Shinra’s defense- it was a total accident.

“AH!” Tamaki screamed, arms shooting up to cover herself as she was splashed with water. She had been leaving her prayer session with Iris when she crashed into Shinra carrying a water pitcher.

“I’m so sorry! Here!” Facing away, Shinra yanked off his shirt, offering it to Tamaki.

“Why are you stripping?” She squealed, flushing as red as he did.

“I’m not! I’m trying to be a hero!” He cried back, still refusing to look. When he felt his shirt being taken and heard the sound of her pulling it on, he dared a peek. “Sorry, Tamaki…”

“It’s fine- I’m covered.” She sighed, pulling at the hem of his shirt. It was so big on her- falling mid thigh. At least the bottom of her prayer robes were dry. “Thank you. That would have been an awkward walk back.”

“Hm!” Shinra nodded, still looking rather flustered. A tense silence passed over them both, both too awkward to say anything. “Well- I better go! Um- keep the shirt! Bye!”

“Huh-Wait, Shinra-!” But he was already booking it away, leaving Tamaki standing on her own.

~~~

“And now he won’t even talk to me! It’s not like he really saw anything!” Tamaki groaned at the desk, poking at her lunch. It had been a few days since the lecher incident, and Shinra had been avoiding her like the plague. Anytime they crossed paths, he’d go bright red and give her a wide girth of space-avoiding her eyes.

It reminded her of the kids back at school. The old wound ached in painful memory.

“Hm…that is strange. Shinra never acted like that before.” Iris nodded around her spoonful of pudding, looking thoughtful. “Did he say anything else before running off?”

“Nothing I haven’t told you already.” Tamaki sank further, drooping with gloom. “I just want things to go back to normal. And to give him back his shirt.” It was tucked away in her room, folded and pressed. “He probably got tired of being polite and doesn’t want to take a chance with me anymore.”

“That’s not true! You know he’s not that kind of guy.” Maki reassured, reaching out and taking Tamaki’s hand. “You two just need to talk, that’s all. Put your guards down and just come out with how you’re feeling about each other!”

“Come out with…” Tamaki blinked, then she flushed bright pink, dropping her chopsticks. “What-wait, wait- Huh?”

“Too soon?” Maki shared a look with Iris, smiling a tad sheepishly.

“They’ll figure it out.” Iris stole Tamaki’s chopsticks before nipping a bite of her lunch.

~~~

“Feeling about each other?” Tamaki mused on her walk back to the bunks, shaking her head. Maki was in la la land again- she had to be! Why else would she ask such a question…

As if sensing her thoughts, Shinra appeared before her, eyes downcast in his own thoughts. He looked up just as she did. “Ah! Tamaki! Eh- hey!” He yelped, face red as he looked anywhere but her for an escape.

That’s it. Enough is ENOUGH.

“Oh no- you’re not running away from me!” Tamaki declared, more pissed off than flustered. Without really thinking about it, she charged at him, tackling him into the ground. “Talk to me! Why are you being so weird?”

“T-Tamaki! Let me up!” Shinra had his head turned all the way up, refusing to look back down. “I can’t-”

“What? You can’t be my friend anymore?” Anger curled into hurt, her voice cracking some halfway. “You’re done with me because of the lecher lure?”

“What? No- Not at all!” Shinra looked back at her, panic replacing his nerves. “Tamaki, that’s not it-”

“Then tell me!” She cried, returning to anger. “Tell me what the problem is!”

Shinra opened his mouth, but nothing came out. He looked like a fish out of water, the words stuck in his throat as he helplessly looked anywhere and everywhere but her. “I….I can’t say.”

“Why not?” She glared.

“Cause…cause it’s embarrassing!” He covered his face with both hands, flopping back into the ground. “You’ll hate me.”

“....” Tamaki stared at him. Then- without warning, she grabbed his sides, squeezing.

“AH! Ahehehehehhehe!” Shinra arched at the touch, giggling. “T-Tahahahamki!”

“I don’t hate you- I don’t think I could ever hate you.” She nodded, feeling rather ruffled. “And I don’t care how embarrassing it is- I want to know! It’s the least you can do after all that time ignoring me!”

“I’m sohoohooohhrry! I prohohohohmise it’s nohohohot you!” He cackled, hands covering his face as he kicked and squirmed. “Whehehehell it kihihiihihinda ihiihiihihs? Ahehahahahahha Tahahahhamahahahahki!”

“Which one is it? Is it me or is it not me?” Normally she’d be more irritated by such mixed signals, but Shinra was talking to her again- well; laughing with her anyway. She scritched her nails along his belly and waist, giggling when he squealed. “For a hero, you’re sure bad at talking about yourself. Out with it!”

“AHehahahahahhahhahaha! Noohohohooho, dohoohohohohn’t tihihihihihickle me thehehehehhere!” Shinra’s hands shot to hers, stopping midway. “Nohohoohooho fhahahhahahhair!”

“Too scared to touch me? Afraid you’re gonna get burned?” She teased, squeezing along the underside of his ribs and making him scream. “Fine by me- I get to keep tickling you! Now- TALK!”

“Iihiihihihiihi cahahahhahahn’t! He squealed, face flushed a pretty pink. “TahahhamakIHIHIHIIHII!”

“I’m waiting~” She had switched over to his legs, squeezing his knees with both hands. “You know- cats do this.” She began kneading his upper thighs, further driving him wild. “Talk to me or I’m going for your feet!”

“TAHAHHAHAMKI NOHOHOOHOHOHOOOO!” He howled, punching the ground repeatedly as he thrashed about. Tamaki wasn’t bluffing- she’d absolutely go for his worst spot. “PLEAHHAHAHHASE MEHEHEHEHRCY!”

“Are you gonna talk?” She gave him a small break, stretching out until she was pinning his legs with her body, flicking off a sandal. “Or are we gonna have to get serious?” To further her point, she shaped her hand into a cat paw with her pyrokinesis. Her trademark trick- Shinra was gonna DIE. “Last chance.”

Shinra gasped for air, hands covering his face as he tried to compose himself. The words rattled his ribs, desperate to be heard, but it was just too, too much! “Tamaki…”

“Hm.” Was all she said at his tone. Then her cat paw attacked.

“AH!” Shinra couldn’t speak- he couldn’t think. He couldn’t really do anything at that moment. The second those fiery claws touched- warm and fluffy despite what they were made of- he was racked with ticklishness all throughout his body. It was like she’d found the one bundle of nerves that activated the rest- making every tickle spot on him burst to life. “AHEHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!”

“Wow- and I thought you were bad without the claws.” Tamaki mused with an impish grin, delighted. Shinra was a mess, flailing behind her like a fish out of water as he guffawed. His face was getting redder- and his smile; normally a nervous tick- looked so real and genuine it made her stop breathing for a moment.

Stop breathing…Oh sh- “Shinra! You okay?” She stopped, remembering that air was kinda necessary to live. Upon ending her tickles, Shinra curled into himself, hiccups breaking up his giggle fits as he twitched in tickly residue. 

“Ahehehehe…hehehhee…I’m ohohokay. Nothing to wohohorry about..” He reassured her, easing her worry. When he could breathe normally again, he rolled onto his back, covering his face with a hand. “Sorry…”

“Huh? Why are you apologizing? I was the one tickling you to near death.” Tamaki shook her head- then paused. “Oh wait- this is the earlier thing, right?”

“Yeah. I…” Shinra dropped his hand as he willed himself to look at her. “I’m about to tell you something…and I don’t know how you’re gonna react, but please hear me out.”

“Okay…?”

“Right. So…erm.” Shinra seemed to shake, mouth pressed into a thin line as he willed the words front and center. To her surprise, he seemed rather flushed- a new shade of pink coloring his already hot cheeks. “The reason I’ve been avoiding you…it’s erm..my shirt.”

“....huh?” That was it? “But- you lent it to me! If you just wanted it back-”

“No! No- that’s not- that’s not it.” Shinra quickly cut in, flushing even more. “God, why is this so hard to say? I…I don’t know what happened, but when I saw you standing there in it…something kinda clicked.” Shinra sat up, looking at his hands as he spoke. “I erm…I…”

Tamaki blinked at him, taking it in. Then her eyes grew wide, cheeks warming as the realization hit her. “Shinra…are you confessing?”

Shinra seemed to flush more, but then he nodded.

Put your guards down and just come out with how you’re feeling about each other!

She internally apologized to Maki for doubting her intuition.

“I guess I am…I’ve er- kinda liked you for a while now. I figured at first it was just us bonding, but then I started seeing, you know? How you light up when we decide to get something good to eat, or how you never give up on your ambitions and goals to get stronger. How you sing to yourself when you’re cleaning up or cooking, and how you always play with your hair when you’re in mid-thought. I just…” Shinra shook his head, smiling a small but real smile. “I realized when I looked at you in my T-Shirt: ‘Wow. I’m falling for this girl.’

But then I panicked and ran cause…yeah.” Shinra chuckled sheepishly, finally looking her in the eye. “I’m not…entirely sure what I’m doing here. I’m probably gonna mess up a hundred times over before I get it right, and I’m sorry if I do. But…if you’d have me, I’d like to be more than friends, Tamaki.”

More than friends…Be still, her beating heart. Looking at Shinra, hearing him speak in that soft voice- the voice he seemed only to reserve for her she realized now, her vision grew blurred. Shinra’s nervous smile grew panicked at her tears, but before he could do anything, Tamaki threw herself into his arms, knocking them both over once more.

“You’re so stupid, Shinra.” She said against his chest, no malice in her voice. “Of course I’d have you.” She sat up, gathering her own courage. “You’re the first real person that didn’t shy away or avoided me- not with the lure, and not when everything was said and done. You saved me more times than you’ve realized. You’re my hero, Shinra. If you’d have me…I’d like that too.”

Shinra seemed to stop breathing. Then he was smiling, really- truly smiling. “Tamaki…” He brushed his thumb over her cheek, cupping her face as his other fingers played with the loose strands of her hair. She leaned down to kiss him-

“Devil! Lady Tamaki- what are you two doing at this hour?” Arthur’s cry of surprise sent Tamaki stumbling, crashing into Shinra’s chest. Amazingly enough, her lure didn’t kick in. A small blessing in a mess of flustered moments.

“Arthur, could you PLEASE not shout? You’ll wake the Lieutenant!” Shinra growled, helping Tamaki up before turning to his roommate.

“Apologies- a knight king as myself must always make sure his kingdom is safe.” If he caught on, Arthur didn’t say- but there was something a bit knowing in that smile of his. “My energy bar is running low- I must recharge. Good evening.” With that, he turned on his heels, disappearing back into the room.

“Odd as ever.” Shinra laughed, shaking his head. Tamaki snorted in her hand, just as amused. “Still- we better call it a night here; who knows who we’ve woken up with our antics.” Shinra swung their hands together before leaning in, pressing a kiss against Tamaki’s cheek. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Sounds good. Goodnight, hero.” Tamaki squeezed his hand in return before letting him go, making her way back to her own room. Shinra signed in content, leaning into the wall beside him.

“So the devil does have a weakness.” Arthur’s voice broke him out of his thoughts, startling him. “Two weaknesses. Good to know.”

“Why you- GET OVER HERE!”

Thanks for reading! :D

[ahsoka-its-all-of-us]

13 PLEASE!!!

13: Too loud

Okay I spent the entire day today as artistic presenter at a classical and art music festival which included multiple performances on non-Western instruments and I got inspired and basically wrote this in between concerts whoops

And then it inspired me a whole lot more and long story short it's now two in the morning and I also already halfway scripted this as a full part of my Kalluzeb series and it's gonna contain an absolutely pivotal moment 👀

All because I think Zeb would be able to play some sort of traverse flute lol

Anyway; thank you for the prompt! It took me a while to think of something for it, but then it happened in the blink of an eye ❤️

Alexsandr Kallus was on the landing platform on Yavin 4, on his way back from delivering a final briefing to Gold Squadron, when a disturbance made him stop in his tracks. A noise, coming from his far right; high-pitched screams paired with an almost animalistic growling. He turned to its source, wary.

The Ghost. Of course.

Half a second later, Ezra came running out of the ship at top speed, an enraged Zeb at his heels. Ezra used his Force abilities to jump over and slide under the various parked ships, but Zeb’s natural Lasat build allowed him to keep up the chase.

Ezra had spotted Alexsandr watching their antics. “Protect me, Alex!” he cried out, jumping behind Alexsandr.

Zeb skidded to a halt in front of him, snarling.

“Should I even ask?” Alexsandr asked tiredly. For some reason, Zeb always managed to get into the pettiest of fights with the Jedi teenager.

“He insulted my flute!” Zeb said indignantly.

“No, I didn’t!” Ezra called from behind Alexsandr’s back. “I just told him to stop whistling, he was being way too loud!”

“No I wasn’t!” Zeb retorted.

“Kanan wants me to practice meditating” Ezra said, in that specific infuriatingly smug tone only a teenager could manage. “You wanna tell him why I couldn’t?”

“Just meditate somewhere else!” Zeb growled.

“Just play flute somewhere else!” Ezra countered.

Alexsandr rubbed his eyes in frustration, already regretting he settled for Cassian’s weak caf that morning instead of making his own. “You can use my office to play flute” he sighed. “If you want.”

Zeb gave him a surprised and somewhat sceptical look. “You’re not using it?”

“I am?” Alexsandr replied.

“Er… won’t that be distracting, then?”

“I have worked in much worse conditions.”

That much was true; after nearly twenty years with the Empire there were few things that could still deter him from doing his duty.

Back in his office, Alexsandr turned his screens back on. “I wasn’t aware you play flute.”

“I don’t” Zeb reacted. “My parents made me take lessons, but I hated it. I was just curious whether I could still do it.”

Alexsandr nodded. “Well, go ahead.”

He swiped through the various programs in his holographic overlay as Zeb started playing. It was a little rough at first, a lot of breathing noises interspersed with various frustrated karabasts, but eventually actual tone appeared, and Zeb began playing tunes, getting into it quickly.

It was.. it was nice. Alexsandr had never listened to music other than checking whether he was walking in step with the Imperial March, but there was something about Zeb playing the flute that drew him in, that filled him with a sense of serenity.

And before he knew it, Alexsandr found himself staring, his work completely forgotten.

When Zeb noticed his gaze, he fell silent, looking insecure as he fiddled with the keys.

“Don’t stop” Alexsandr blurted out softly.

“What?” Zeb asked, surprised.

Alexsandr could feel the blush creeping into his cheeks, but he willed it down. “It’s… it’s nice. I like it.”

Zeb’s fur fluffed up ever so slightly.  “Oh” he said merely.

For a moment neither of them said anything, Alexsandr pretending to have turned his full attention back to the screen.

“I could come play here more often” Zeb suggested.

“I thought you hated playing flute” Alexsandr said, raising an eyebrow at him.

“You know what?” Zeb replied, giving him a warm smile. “I think it’s starting to grow on me.”

[raccoon-eyed-rebel]

My favorite fic of yours

This was actually not that easy to answer, but in the end I’ll go with 179 Crescent Street. This is how I found you, fell in love with your Mikey and then with all the other guys. 

My favorite chapter in my favorite fic of yours

Part 9 - Of Vice and Men - I mean, it’s Mike & Sy… Don’t need to say more

The best character you've written for

Your Mike is just perfect in every tiny bit you wrote for him

The best ship you've written for

Melot & Tamsyn - they are made for one another 🥰

A fic I haven't read yet from you, but I want to

Surfer!Mikey 🥺

Something I remember vividly from reading one of your fics

Me making my most pouty face ever all the while I was reading the first chapter of White Blossoms - I was melting

What made me the most emotional after reading

Part 25 of Fixer Upper - Took me back 14 years to the most important day in my life. And you did so fucking well with this. It is still one of my favorite moments ever in reading fanfiction.

 What I like the most about your writing

Your sense of humour. I just love it!

A fic i'm excited for you updating/posting

Everything! For real! I can’t choose what I want you to work on. I need all of it!

A character/ship I didn't enjoy/think about as much before you wrote about them

You ignited my love for Melot, even before I got to read your stuff. But be sure, the way you write him made me fall even harder in love with him

Something I wish/hope you write

That modern au Charles fic you mentioned ages ago

A fic of yours that i've re-read

Uhm, I think there isn’t anything in your masterlist that I haven’t read at least twice. Like, every time I reblog I end up reading it once more. And some I may have read probably ten times or more. 

If i've ever shared/talked about your fic to someone else

lol - no - I would never talk about your stuff, or link it when people are talking about Sy teaching Mike how to go down on a woman or even DM spamming other mutuals with your stories. Or maybe I did all of this 😁

A fic I didn't expect to like so much

Making a mess of Mikey - He’s such a subby babygirl - but I love it - why did you make me love a subby babygirl?

A question I have about one of your fics

Under Orders 5 feat. the Captain - When? 

Ni.Na. You made me cry. Okay? (I read this when I was in a bad bad mood, you made it better.)

Where do I begin? -- At the beginning? That sounds logical. Ew. Oh well...

I've never been more glad that I got the crazy idea to toss 8 Henry-shaped men into the same house, because I might not have met you if I hadn't done that, and I wouldn't want to miss you <3

A fun fact about 'Of Vice and Men' -- It literally took me so long to write, and I initially hadn't planned on the three of them getting high together, but it just wouldn't happen any other way...

Your Mike is just perfect in every tiny bit you wrote for him

Hihi Thank you! (Which Mike... They're all so different, yet all the same adorable dork, whoops)

I am so glad you're loving Melot and Tamsyn (she was, quite literally, made for him. Hehe) They're so sweet and I love them so much, too...

Surfer!Mikey is 100% still underway - I'm just a little distracted at the moment, but I'm really close to realllyyyy finishing up White Blossoms, and then I hope I can shift my attention to my handsome surfer...

That modern au Charles fic you mentioned ages ago

That's really low on my list of things right now, I'm sorry :( I'll let you know if that ever gets back on the roster!

Making a mess of Mikey - He’s such a subby babygirl - but I love it - why did you make me love a subby babygirl?

Because I am evil, that's why... (I didn't know I'd love subby babygirl Mikey, either, but I think he's so fucking great T0T)

Under Orders 5 feat. the Captain - When? 

When I finally figure out what adding Sy will do to the relationship dynamic 🫣 I don't want to half-ass it and I realize it's taking a long time, but I need to get it right, sorry <3\

Cute head scritches for you, my dear non-rodent bestie <3

[vegalocity]

AU idea based off the fact that MK's age is unknown- Xiaotian is Wukong's son and before everything fell apart, he and Red Boy were childhood sweethearts. And now, for reasons, neither really remember each other but are drawn to each other.

okay this is really interesting to me because this feels like it could be one of those AUs that technically plays with canon but doesn't subvert it like a normal AU

Like, One would think that maybe Red Son would remember after all it was Xiaotian's fucking father that sealed his father away, but if they BOTH don't really remember eachother lets take it a step farther-

(under a cut bc i got carried away bc i speant like all shift today thinking about this)

Let's say that neither of them remember their own childhoods at all. Idk how or why, thats not the point, but if we run with this, then we can assume Xiaotian grew up on FFM, but after a certain point left for the city, maybe since he's just.. way more extroverted than his dad he just wanted to be around people other than the monkeys, and bc... you know... reasonsTM he's been keeping his relationship with Wukong secret. Also it's fun to hear how the stories that were some of his favorites of his dad's adventures ended up remembered by others. And he's not sure if Tang's research was a flawed history or his dad embellished a bit more to entertain him as a child, or maybe both, but some of these stories as Tang tells them are VERY different.

But it's then, when he's living alone and always out and about on deliveries something-... happens... something mysterious and-

Suddenly he can't really remember much about a time before he moved in to the little loft above Pigsy's shop.

And the letters (emails) keeping Wukong updated stop coming. He considers finally giving in and getting a cellphone to call his damn kid and ask if he's alright, but Xiaotian never answers his phone for unknown numbers- Is- is something wrong? Is he in trouble?...Maybe he'll just pop into the city real quick in disguise, just to be certain, and if there's not a problem he can laugh to himself about being paranoid and then come to visit properly-

And maybe just to check up on it, peek in on his staff to make sure everything's still in place.

And then Red Boy was there, holding some machine apparatus to his. damn. staff. and taking readings, writing down whatever he's got and muttering to himself about 'the plan' and Red Boy--certainly no longer a boy much like how his own son had become a man, was planning something.

blah blah blah the pilot happens but whoops this time canon is like EXTREMELY sad through Wukong's perspective bc his OWN FUCKING KID somehow FORGOT ABOUT BEING HIS KID?! WHAT THE FUCK?! and he'd TRIED getting him back on his own but that did nothing, and then he'd faced LBD again and she said that thing 'the memory of you' and... yeah that context would make this whole thing like WAY scarier lol

ANYWAY SO SEASON 3 ROLLS ALONG AND RED SON IS PLOT RELEVANT AGAIN

And maybe it's just brought up breifly, just simply while the lot of them were chillin around the dinner table, Xiaojiao tells this hilarious story of her childhood involving a bee, a sequoia tree and several gallons of applesauce, and asks Red Son if he's got any crazy stories like that, and he says very bluntly 'I can't remember Jack shit from my childhood.' Xiaotian over here like 'Big mood' Sun Wukong exits as quickly as he can without it looking sus (-insert subplot ship here-)

And here's the thing, now that they're not trying to fight eachother it's easy to get comfy around eachother. Too easy. Like suspiciously easy. Like 'I had multiple naptimes beside you for the majority of my younger years and by that logic when we're not actively enemies i trust you implicitly' easy

Memory seems to come up a lot on their search for the weapon, and whenever that heppans the others seem to carry the missions, leaving Xiaotian and Red Son constantly feeling useless, and its starting to get really REALLY upsetting, so Red Son just huffs, and approached Xiaotian's bunk one day like 'It's odd right? That you and I have the exact same sort of memory problems, and we have both been in contact the most with LBD other than Wukong is it possible that these events are all related?'

so they start working to try and figure out what it was they'd both forgotten.

[blisslilywrites]

Teacher squad (Toshinori, Aizawa, and Hizashi) with a younger S/O that has the attitude and seductive voice like Jessica Rabbit. Love to read the Students reactions to it.

A/N: Used fem pronouns for this cuz its uh Jessica Rabbit lol. Anyway they turned out a little longer than I expected but I hope you enjoy it uwu ~Lily

PART 2

ALL MIGHT / Toshinori Yagi

You and All Might have been together for a while now

It just so happens that he left his lunch box at home today

And since you were free, why not go give it to him?

You were a bit lost as you haven’t been to UA much but eventually found him

He was standing outside his classroom, about to go enter, when he heard you call out to him

He was a bit shocked to see you here

And that shock was visible to some of the students

They all started whispering, wondering what was going on

One or two of them probably caught sight of you as you neared the class door

This prompted even louder chatter among the students

“Who’s that?”

“Nevermind that. She looks really good.”

“Shut up Mineta.”

“She really does though”

“Everyone be quiet. This is disrespectful.”

All Might quickly poked his head in and told them to behave because he had “some business he needed to attend to”

This, of course, stirred the students even more

Cmon, their teacher who’s famous was approached by this young, very good-looking woman 

They obviously wouldn’t just sit around and stay quiet

Outside, you gave him his lunch box and a small peck on the cheek 

All Might opened the door and walked in

Before he could close the door though, you called out to him in that sweet, sexy voice of yours

“Enjoy your lunch honeybun”

All Might’s cheeks turned scarlet as he looked at his students’ faces

Some were confused

Some were shocked

Some immediately realized what was going on and started whooping

Then there was Deku, who kept berating himself for not knowing who you, someone close to All Might, was

All Might finally got them to calm down and explained everything, telling them to be respectful towards you and the subject entirely 

Once it was made clear, the class got a bit curious and asked a few questions about the two of you

The entire time, All might looked like a teenager, gushing over his girlfriend

ERASERHEAD / Aizawa Shouta

Aizawa never expected to be with you for this long

And because of that he finally decided to show you around UA and introduce you to the other teachers/staff

Somehow, the students got word of your visit and tried to get a glimpse at the woman who owns Aizawa’s heart

Let’s just say they weren’t that successful

Oh they tried

Pretty hard

But Aizawa always did something that hindered them from properly meeting you 

He knows how they’d all react if he introduced you to them and well, he probably wasn’t mentally prepared for it yet

That didn’t stop a few students from standing outside the teachers’ room and trying to listen in on you guys

Jiro was among these people, and with her quirk, she got a pretty clear idea of how you sounded

And let’s just say she was a bit shocked to hear how hot your voice was

Just listening to the conversation alone confused her a lot 

Like how?? Did Aizawa, of all people, end up with someone who seemed as seductive as you

She, of course, told the rest of the students there what she heard and well…

They were shocked too

Most of them blatantly voiced their disbelief

They caused quite a ruckus

Which led to Aizawa coming out and shooing them all away

But before he could get them all to leave

You peeked your head out of the door 

Their reactions: 

awestruck➡shock➡confusion

You gave them a warm smile and turned to Aizawa

“So are these the kids you’ve been talking about, sho-chan?”

Those who disagreed with Jiro before were now staring wide-eyed at you

The same thoughts ran through everyone’s minds

This is the woman Aizawa-sensei’s with????

Yeah they fried their brains trying to figure it out

Aizawa looked extremely tired already

Cuz he knew the moment class started, he’d be bombarded with questions

But seeing the excitement and enthusiasm in your eyes made him smile a little

What’s a couple of questions from a bunch of nosy kids when he’s got you with him

PRESENT MIC / Yamada Hizashi

You and Present Mic met through your hero agency

You weren’t a hero but a manager

And well, you were probably one of the best managers he’s ever come across

One thing led to another and before you knew it, the two of you got together

He was always going on about how much he loved your voice and how it contrasted with his

So anyway, today he was supposed to take his class on a tour of some hero agencies

So that they’ll get an idea of how being a hero works and all

It just so happened that the agency you worked in was the first one they’d be visiting

When they arrived, you greeted them and led them inside

Turns out you were going to be their tour guide for the day

Throughout their time there, you acted professionally and so did Present Mic

You led them around the agency explaining the different processes and basically how everything works

You also gave them many little tips they could use when they start working as heroes

Surprisingly, the students were well-behaved and paid close attention to every word you were saying

Neither you nor Present Mic were very surprised though

You had a beautiful and near hypnotic voice

It was one of the reasons the great Present Mic fell for you in the first place

About halfway through the tour, you brought everyone to the canteen for some snacks

While the kids did their thing, you and Present Mic stood at the back of the room talking to each other

Both of you were smiling and looking at each other sweetly

The students noticed this and immediately started shipping you guys

Cuz, well, that’s how they are

When you resumed the tour, you could tell the kids were a bit more excited than usual

Like when you held this door open for everyone and Present Mic smiled at you

A lot of them started whispering to each other in hushed and urgent tones

“Did you see that??”

“Ajdakjsd he smiled at her”

“Don’t you think they’d be cute together”

The two of you pretended not to hear them and continued with the tour

At the end of it, as the kids were getting onto the bus, you gave Present Mic a kiss on the cheek goodbye

The students who saw that freaked out

Their teacher had a lot of explaining to do…

[cantteachanoldguardnewquotes]

Febuwhump Day 22 Restrained

Warnings: kidnapped, fighting

Whoops I fell behind on these prompts and I know febuwhump is over but I'm still gonna try and finish them lol 🤷

It was dark and misty and Joe was so focused on listening to the men in front of him talk about raiding the village a few ports over he didn't hear the men sneak up behind him before it was too late.

They bound and dragged him onto one of the many ships in the harbor, he couldn't tell which one, and brought him before their captain.

"Do ya have a death wish poking your nose in business that don't pertain to ya?" The captain asked him.

"I never wish for death especially when it involves business. It's no fault of mine if your men talk so freely by the docks for any fellow to overhear, so kindly free me and I'll be gone before you can see the sunrise." Joe figured they would just run him through and throw him overboard, it would be unpleasant but simple enough to get back to shore.

"Perhaps you should learn the name of the captain and ship you're on before you get too cocky there." The captain said in a tone that said he was not used to being talked too so openly.

"And who is it that I have the honor of speaking too?" Joe asked unimpressed.

"Captain Traiveard and I'd like to welcome you to my ship the Silver Sun." Without waiting for a response he added. "Throw him in the cell. We'll decide what to do with him after we're at sea."

Joe didn't let his unease show. "You'd keep a useless land lover like me? I'm only good for tending horse. I can't even swim!"

The captain didn't even glance his way as they dragged him off. He was thrown in a cell and left there.

He couldn't believe his misfortune. They'd been searching for captain Traiveard for months now, he and his crew had been terrorizing the coast for ages, and Joe and the guard had been trying to put an end to it. It was difficult, since there was no way to predict when the captain would attack again, and they changed ships so often it was hard to see them coming. He was known for his ruthlessness and legend said no common man had seen him and lived to tell the tail. Rumors and legends ran freely amongst the towns folk and no one felt safe. 

He let his head fall back against the rough wood of his cell and he thought about how distraught everyone would be about him disappearing like this. Nicky would be worried sick searching the docks for him, Andy would ask everyone she knew, and neither of them would be able to sleep.  All he could do was wait until they actually decided to do something with him. He didn't know why they were putting it off but he hated knowing he was getting farther away from his family. 

He sat in that cell for hours watching people come and go but never acknowledge him. Most of the time he was by himself with nothing to occupy his mind but worry. They were going at a quick pace and they had been for a while, he wondered what the rush was, surely no one else knew who they were let alone their plans. 

Days passed, they gave him no food or water, it was like he had been totally forgotten. Mostly all he did was sleep, he had tried every way imaginable to escape and still hadn't managed it. 

He heard a cannon fire and he dreaded being on this boat when they attacked the port they had been planning on raiding. He didn't want any more people to join him down here, he didn't want to sit and listen to everything while he could do nothing about it. 

To his surprise he heard a cannon fire back and it sounded close. He heard the crew running, and preparing more cannons and weapons.  

Then the fighting began. Joe was once again surprised that he could hear it over head, someone was attacking the ship, he hoped it meant he would be able to get out of here finally. 

It went on for what seemed like ages before he heard footsteps coming down the stairs. To his shock it was Andy. 

"Andy!" 

"Joe?" She looked just as surprised. "They kidnapped you? Are you alright?" She ran over to the cell and unlocked it with the keys she had stolen. 

"I've been worse, I've been better, I'm just glad to see you." 

He was so weak she had to help him out and up the stairs. 

"Is Nicky here?" He asked craning his neck every which way once he was above deck. 

"He stayed behind looking for you. I figured out what ship we needed to track down and we felt like I couldn't let this opportunity slip away so I chased down Traiveard myself. Thank heavens I did too." 

Joe had to agree, who knows how long he would have rotted in that cell if it wasn't for Andy showing up when she did. 

"Where is he now? I see you made quick work of the rest of the crew." 

"He fought till the end but wouldn't surrender, he's dead now. We'll take the remaining crew back to port and hand them over, let the people their decide what to do with them." 

Joe nodded, he was glad they wouldn't be able to hurt anymore people. 

"Here." She gave him some bread and water. "Eat up and get some of your strength back."

He felt a little better by the time they docked and much better once Nicky was holding him again.

"You scared me my love." Nicky told him brushing his curls out of his face.

"I'm sorry, but I promise I'm alright."

"You scared both of us." Andy said bumping her shoulder against his. "But it's nothing a little dinner and a nights rest can't help remedy." 

Joe and Nicky agreed, and the three of them went home.

[infjsnightmare]

How You Met: Guild Style

A/N: Hello! This one was so much more difficult to write. I think maybe I just don't have as good a grip on the personalities of the guild so much. Lol. So, this might have a bit more OOC than the other two. Also, I flip-flopped for a while and decided not to include Francis since he is canonically married, but if anyone wants me to, I can probably include him on the same one that I include any other extraneous characters on. With that out of the way, I sincerely hope that you like this! Feedback of any kind is always welcomed and appreciated.

John: You were scanning the aisles of the convenience store, looking for any food that was on sale. Your eyes lit up when you found a tuna salad sandwich for only 99 cents. You should have enough change for this at least. All your money went to rent since being laid off and you actually hadn't eaten in two days. This was like a holy grail. Placing the sandwich in front of the large man at the register, you turned your change purse inside out. Meticulously counting each coin, you realized you only had 87 cents, which was 12 cents too short. The man scoffed taking the sandwich away as he chastised you and told you to "get a job". You were on the brink of tears when a hand came up from behind you and dropped the remaining needed change on the table. An angry looking young blond man glared menacingly at the employee as he spat at him, grabbing the sandwich and placing it in your hands.

"Why don't you get a life, jackass?"

Lovecraft: The sun was beaming hot as you lay back in the sand and let the warmth overtake you. The smell of the ocean and the distant cry of seagulls relaxed your body. You sighed, sitting up to watch the waves crash against the shore when you saw something dark begin emerging from the water. At first it looked like seaweed, but slowly a tall lanky man in a suit slowly walked up out of the water, absolutely drenched. Your eyes widened in fear as it looked like something straight out of a horror movie. You watched intently as the man walked up on to the beach aimlessly. Then he turned his head at an unnatural to look straight at you.

"Where can I get some ice cream?... It's too hot."

Lucy: You were at work, scrubbing the floors by the cash register even though your shift ended over an hour ago. You weren't going to get paid for this overtime either, but you knew you needed the job to make ends meet. Your boss also knew this, unfortunately, and took advantage of it. The manager lazily eyed you as they were laughing with a friend of theirs who had stopped by. "Put some more elbow grease into it!" You heard the teasing chirp from the idiot. You felt like a dog. Gritting your teeth, you scrubbed furiously, imagining the spot on the floor to be your manager's face. Until you were interrupted by a the voice of a young girl with a slight blush adorning her face, almost the same shade of red as her hair.

"It's really none of my business....and it's not like I care or anything...but, you shouldn't let your employer treat you like a slave."

Edgar: You were perusing the mystery section of the library and had finally settled on which book you would like to read next. Pulling it of the shelf, you tucked the book under your arm and made your way to the sitting area to give the first few chapters a quick read before deciding to borrow it for the week. When you got to the desk, you noticed that there was a printed manuscript left on the table. You set down the book you were holding in favor of the paper-clipped pages. You were delighted by the writing. It was a magnificent mystery. You were smiling from ear to ear as you read each page with fervor. You were slightly take aback at the light tugging at your clothes, looking down to see a raccoon. Followed closely behind him was an adorable man with tousled dark hair and a crimson blush over his whole face.

"Ah! My manuscript! I must have left it here, I'm so sorry!"

Mark: You were walking through your usual peaceful trail in the woods, following the path of a small creek. The crunch of dead leaves underfoot and the crisp autumn air made the atmosphere serene and enticing. You could've have lost yourself to the sounds of nature if it weren't for the the whooping and hollering that you heard further down the creek. As you drew closer, you could hear the shattering of glass breaking, followed by another victorious yell. You finally came to a small clearing, seeing a vivacious young man with bright orange hair shooting rocks at glass bottles with a sling-shot. He looked at your direction and aimed the sling shot towards you. You opened your mouth to protest when he released the stone. It whirred past your head, hitting a bottle strung up on a tree branch behind you. The man beamed with glee.

"Boom! Nailed it!"

Nathaniel: Looking out your window this morning, you felt giddy at the light dusting of snow you saw. Snow was a rarity in December and here it was, on Christmas no less. Placing your jacket on, you dashed out of your apartment to walk and see all the lights around town and the couples holding hands. It was a joyous atmosphere despite it being a minor holiday. You stopped in your tracks when you saw a tall man dressed in priestly garb, sitting and reading from a book that you could only assume was religious in nature. You'd never seen a priest before and were rather awestruck as you watched his silver hair fall in front of his glasses as he poured over his book. You didn't even look away when he stopped reading to stare back at you. Or when he cleared his throat with his brow lifted in irritation. Or even when he stood up and walked the few steps closing the distance between you. But, once he spoke, you finally felt embarrassment as your cheeks felt hot against the winter air.

"You do realize that it is particularly rude to stare, right?"

Margaret: The vending machine whirred as you selected your drink. It was sweltering out and you definitely needed the cool liquid to combat the heat during your break. You'd been moving containers off the ships all morning, so you were pretty beat by the time your break rolled around. You sat on the edge of the dock listening to the squabble between two passengers on a boat. One passenger was dressed in religious attire and seemed apathetic towards the argument. The other passenger was a tall woman dressed in a large frilly dress with a rather robust petticoat. Her honey-hair was pulled up under a sun-hat like a true southern american belle. In opposition to the man's apathy, she seemed quite fiery, eyes steeled and jaw clenched. In a huff, she marched down off the boat. The ramp led next to where you were sitting, eyeing the woman as you drank your beverage. Her eyes snapped towards you as she noticed your watchful gaze. She relaxed her her face ever so slightly meeting your eyes as she motioned towards the man on the ship.

"Bless his heart, but I swear some men just aren't raised proper."

Herman: The rain was was all you could hear as it pitter-pattered against your umbrella while you made your way back home. Your feet were walking along the slippery cobblestone sidewalk with a practiced gait. You always took this path home. The same scenes, the same faces- nothing to shake you from your daze. However, the faintest glow of white caught your attention. You rubbed your eyes with your free hand to confirm that you were, in fact, seeing a small white whale happily floating through the air and rain. You followed it in wonderment until you came across an older gentleman sitting on a bench smoking from a pipe, umbrella propped against the back of his seat. You watched as the whale twirled around. Compelled, you sat on the wet bench, next to the sun-tanned man drawing him out of his own thoughts. He gave you a wry smile as the whale danced between you.

"Care to sit and chat with a tired, old man?"

Louisa: It was a busy day. You were run ragged as you tried to complete all the errands you had scheduled for yourself today. You had already dropped off a few packages at the post office. Renewed your insurance for the year and now you were in a hurry to pick up your dry-cleaning before the store closed for lunch. You picked up your pace, reaching for the door. Only, when you opened it, an armful of bagged clothing came tumbling on top of you. With it, fell a small-framed young lady with round glasses and the cutest flustered expression you'd ever seen. Her eyes widened in shock as her face turned scarlett.

"Oh n-no! I'm so so so so sorry! Please do-don't be angry!"

[rigmarolling]

Top 5 Things That Will Kill You In the Victorian Era

If you’ve ever spent more than two seconds with me, you know that I live and breathe the fog-choked air of Victorian London. All day. Every day of my life. 

See, in many ways, the Victorians were the first version of us--overwhelmed by rapidly-changing technology (and its awful effect on the climate); dealing with incredible wealth gaps; grappling with rising crime and faster travel and out-of-control media and the whole, “God is dead, oh no” thing. 

Also, everything was trying to kill you.

Like, literally almost everything.

From your clothes to your doctor to your canned food, here are the top five things that will kill you in the Victorian era.

5. Other Victorians

If the rise of penny dreadfuls (cheap magazines stuffed with horror stories for us morbidly-inclined goth types) was any indication, Victorians loved them some true crime. 

And there was no shortage of subject matter to choose from: depending on where you ventured in London, at least, you could be subject to anything from pickpocketing to mugging to violent assault and, of course, murder. 

There were a few reasons for this:

For one thing, the population in London alone increased by millions in the 19th century, and approximately no one was prepared for that. So, to accommodate the rapidly-booming population, the wealthy folks in charge reached out and lovingly ensured the masses of the disenfranchised poor were taken care of by redistributing resources and education and access to opportunities that improved lives on a both a personal and social level.

Lol, no, I’m totally kidding; they shoved them into slums and tenement buildings and pretended they didn’t exist.

So of course, there was a rise in crime, because if you have five kids and you can’t find gainful employment and your family will starve if you don’t steal that basket of food over there, or that purse that lady left sitting over THERE, what are you going to do? You’re going to steal the food and the purse to survive, Jean Valjean, I understand, I do.

Except the powers that be did NOT understand, and instead routinely espoused the idea that if people were poor, it was because they were morally bankrupt, or inherently bad, somehow, and the “criminal classes,” as they came to be known by the growing Victorian middle and upper-middle classes, were simply considered genetically bad to the bone and therefore undeserving of assistance.

Basically:

So ANYWAY.

Crime was on the rise and there were multiple efforts to stop it with varying degrees of success, but big city usually = big crime, especially when there’s a massive gap between the one percent-ers and THE REST OF US, WASHINGTON.

Ahem.

All that crime? The booming news industry loved it. The press ate it up and then spit it back out in salacious headlines that never even bothered with journalistic objectivity, like this gem:

I mean. Full disclosure: I, too, agree that cutting off a woman’s head, arms, and legs and then burning them is “awful, inhuman, & barbarous” but just...maybe...maybe tone it down? Just a bit?

No? Okay.

See, here’s the thing: crime sells. It always has. And papers went nuts with full illustrated spreads about the latest brutal murders so you could sit in your parlor and get anxiety poops thinking about how the butcher down the street looked at you funny the other day and oh, God, you’re probably next, oh God.

The most famous murderer of the era, was, of course, Jack the Ripper, which was just the orchestral climax of a hideously corrupted society that had bubbled into naught but a festering carbuncle, an ulcer upon the very soul of man, trussed up as a city of industry, but which is merely Salome, dancing with the Lamb’s head upon a platter and sending us all tumbling into a fiery pit.

....Ahem, again.

Some popular ways your fellow Victorians could kill you included: dueling (with swords but usually with revolvers), stabbing, garroting, and, probably the most popular method of the era, poisoning.

Speaking of which...

4. Anything dyed that hip shade of green

In 1775, a guy named Carl Wilhelm Scheele invented a new shade of green, cleverly called Scheele’s green, and it instantly became a hit. Pretty soon, manufacturers and tailors were dyeing everything this color. 

Look at it. Bright, airy. Calls to mind a fresh, spring meadow. (What’s that, you ask? Well, before the Industrial Revolution belched out black smoke onto absolutely everything, there were these things called plants and grass and they were all over the place and you could frolic through them and it was very nice for your serotonin levels.)

I mean, listen, this isn’t really my color because anything vaguely yellow-ish makes my already yellow-ish skin look especially jaundiced, but it’s a lovely shade:

Besides using it to create beautiful dresses and tasteful waistcoats, they used it inside book covers:

And it was a super popular wallpaper color:

They had green candles and green cups and green kitchenwares and green paint.

But while Carl Wilhelm Scheele didn’t exactly murder anyone (even though he has three names like every serial killer ever), he sort of, accidentally, indirectly, kinda...did.

Because that springy dye contained every Victorian black widow’s favorite method to dispose of a troublesome husband: arsenic.

Scheele, of course, had no idea--no one did--so I’m fully exonerating him here, but the poison nonetheless started to take its toll.

Reports began to surface of kids getting sicker and sicker and then dying in their green wallpapered rooms; of fashionable ladies rocking those green dresses at balls and then ALSO getting sicker and sicker and breaking out in horrible sores before dying. 

They even used this stuff to dye food green, so of course, anybody who tucked into Victorian green eggs and ham also, you know. Died.

And if they DIDN’T die, they got cancer, because if arsenic doesn’t kill you, it will give you cancer. And then kill you.

Eventually, as science advanced and went, “HEYO, there’s literal poison in this stuff,” consumers were like, “Well, shoot, this summer’s hottest beach shade just killed an entire boarding school,” and Scheele’s green finally fell out of favor.

It was, however, used as a pesticide up through the 1930s, so...way to use the...leftovers? I guess?

3. Your canned food

Hey, now that we’re on the topic of deadly chemicals being where they absolutely should not be, let’s talk about canned food. 

In the Victorian era, it was the new Hot Thing (next to arsenic green). You mean I can can my food now? Like? Forever? Oh, only for a few months. Okay, cool. Still cool. 

Above: Road trip snax.

Food preservation methods had existed long before canned meats and veggies and soups, but canned everything really started to gain traction around the middle of the 19th century, and people were stoked. Remember, the population exploded; people needed new methods of obtaining cheap food that didn’t spoil immediately. So: cans to the rescue! 

Recycling hadn’t really been invented, though, so today, archaeologists constantly find giant Victorian trash pits filled with empty cans.

You know what also hadn’t been invented? Consumer health and safety boards.

So guess what was in the tin cans themselves? 

No, no, don’t worry, it wasn’t arsenic.

It was lead.

Which, in case you weren’t aware, is also very, very bad for you.

So bad, in fact, that today, scientists are pretty sure lead-lined tins of canned food were partially responsible for the deaths on the disastrous Franklin Expedition, an ultimately futile trip to discover the Northwest Passage lead by Sir John Franklin in 1845. Every single man on board the two ships stranded in the Arctic died, and in the 1980s, when scientists discovered perfectly mummified bodies (GRAPHIC, if you don’t like that sort of thing, but awesome if you do) of some of the sailors, one of the mummies contained insane amounts of lead. They later tested the cans found scattered across the wreck site and whoops, they also contained insane amounts of lead.

Above: Some of the tin cans from the Franklin Expedition, which contained items like salted beef, vegetables, tea, lethal amounts of lead, and Chicken of the Sea.

Granted, other factors contributed to the Franklin deaths, like, you know, being stranded in the Arctic and starving to death, and also tuberculosis, but lead-lined canned food certainly didn’t help things along.

2. Your doctor

Here’s my advice if you’re in the Victorian era and you’re starting to feel sick: do not get sick. Just don’t. Because then that means you’ll have to go to the doctor. Which probably means you will die.

Hospitals in the 19th century were deadly. Often even more deadly than just staying at home, according to Dr. Lindsey Fitzharris, author of The Butchering Art. Nobody knew how to treat anything, really, because medical understanding of biology was in its infancy and antibiotics didn’t exist yet, so you were absolutely, definitely going to get some kind of infection the second you stepped foot in a Victorian hospital.

Above: The surgery, where nobody has any idea what they are doing, ever.

Doctors weren’t trying to kill you on purpose--they just didn’t know any better. And it super duper didn’t help that common treatments for everything from the common cold to tuberculosis included taking mercury (which kills you) and blood-letting, (which can also kill you) the tools for which are shown below:

Those might look like fun doodads for your astronomy class at Hogwarts, but they’re actually vials and a really, really sharp needle that pricks you until you bleed out a critically dangerous amount of blood into those vials. 

The (ancient) school of thought behind blood-letting was that draining patients of “bad” blood would rebalance their “humours” and get rid of the icky thing that was making them sick. We might laugh at it now, but if you don’t know any better, logically, it makes sense.

Medically, oh my God, it’s the worst.

So if Doc didn’t bleed you to death, he might try surgery--done without anesthesia or antibiotics (until good old Dr. Lister came along--read The Butchering Art!), and then ship you and your amputated stump leg off to the hospital ward where, instead of healing, you’d get wheeled through hallways stained with every bodily fluid imaginable into rooms filled with people coughing up every bodily fluid imaginable, some of which would get into your leg stump, infect it, and then kill you dead.

“But what about medicine?” you ask. “Can’t I just take medicine?”

Sure! Just be aware that it definitely contains morphine and probably contains cocaine, or mercury, or arsenic, or sulfur, or pulverized bits of ancient Egyptian mummies (I am not kidding. True, the latter had started to fall out of favor in the 19th century, but, like. Stop).

Above: Hard drugs, but just for you.

You think I’m joking?

Above: PARTY TIME.

Sometimes, a doctor would just advise that you move to a “more temperate climate” like Rome or Spain if you were feeling chronically ill, which might help you get a tan and COULD help if you had sucky lungs, but eventually, you’d just die anyway, because what you really needed was a strong antibiotic or antiviral medication and the closest you were gonna get was Mrs. Hopplebopple’s Temperance Tonic, which was probably filled with ground up baby bones and just so much heroin.

And don’t even get me started on Victorian surgical tools:

Open wide.

1. Water

There are three rules in this life: don’t watch any Adam Sandler movies except for maybe Anger Management, don’t eat the yellow snow, and do not, ever, for any reason, ever drink water in Victorian England.

That’s because it was about as clean as a Victorian hospital. 

Meaning it wasn’t. At all.

Victorian water--of the Thames variety--contained:

Cholera, one of the deadliest killers of the era and bad water’s favorite roommate.

Poop, human and otherwise, because a functioning sewer system? I don’t know her. (At least, not until the 1860s.)

Pee, human and otherwise, because nothing says, “Jolly Old England” like an open trench of piss rolling through the city.

Dead things, like animals, fish (which are animals, so why am I listing them as a separate thing?), and, occasionally, humans.

Chemicals, which spewed forth from the great factories in billowing, bubbling, belching rivers of sludge. (Ha! Omg, yes, I was an English major!)

The Thames was so filthy that Londoners called it “Monster Soup.”

Above: Same.

In 1855, scientist Michael Faraday (who was also kind of hot; tell me I’m wrong), wrote a letter to the Times about the disgusting state of the river:

"Near the bridges the feculence rolled up in clouds so dense that they were visible at the surface, even in water of this kind. ... The smell was very bad, and common to the whole of the water; it was the same as that which now comes up from the gully-holes in the streets; the whole river was for the time a real sewer."

Tl;dr: “It smelled like ass.”

In fact, it got so bad, so putrid, so horrifically clogged with every disgusting thing your mind and your butthole can possibly conjure up, that it lead to one of my favorite things to read about in the world: The Great Stink of 1858.

Yes, that’s the real name. I did not make that up. History is incredible.

Above: Summer vacation, 1858.

The summer of 1858 was miserably hot in London. And the Thames was miserably clogged with poop, and pee, and chemicals, and dead things, and, uh oh, cholera. During July and August that year, the smell wafting from the river was so offensive that Parliament was actually adjourned because everybody kept throwing up. Cholera devastated the city. The water was killing London.

Faced with either the prospect of living with a city-wide vomit-and-diarrhea smell for the rest of forever OR finally cleaning things up, the government actually did something right and chose the latter. They contracted civil engineer Joseph Bazalgette to overhaul the city’s sewer, to which Bazalgette, pinching his nose, responded, “FINALLY.” 

Above: Joesph Bazalgette, savior of the London sewers and purveyor of a truly beautiful mustache.

Bazalgette proceeded to build the London sewer system still in use today. His efforts greatly reduced the number of cholera deaths, cleared the Thames of its Cronenberg-esque muck, and ensured that poop goes where it’s supposed to: way the hell out of HERE and way the hell under THERE.

Water sanitation still had a long way to go, though, which meant you either had to boil your water to kill the bacteria in it, or you could just drink alcohol instead, which was the safer option but which would also leave you very dehydrated and also, if imbibed excessively, would leave you very dead.

So really, you were doomed in some way no matter what you did, and if that isn’t the moral of the entire Victorian story, then I don’t know what is.

[judediangelo75]

Hair Raising Situations

Hello everyone!

So this one is gonna be a bit different. 

1) I’m featuring my best friend in this one, because the whole “Judith Harris” development started between us two (She has her own MC of course and a Bill fan, Billiam being on her ship names).

2) It’s not connected to anything I’ve previously written, just a funny little story.

3) It’s not just TalbottxJudith. Shocker I know. Judith isn’t dating anyone but it would go in the order of who she interested in (from most to least). So it could be looked at as multiple ships and you’ll see her attitude to each person she interacts with. 

4) Judith’s hair is straightened here, but when... what happened happens, it would be the same hair cut as Orion’s.

5) We did give Skye a twin brother, his name is Hermes. Get it lol?

Anyways, I hope you like this silly little story. Enjoy!

-------------------------

(Brooke Brown) (Age: 16)

I was currently hiding out in the Courtyard in my Animagus form. Why, you may ask?

Because my best friend/sister is out to kill me.

Let's rewind, shall we?

-A little while earlier-

"I can't wait to prank someone with this Fanged Frisbee. Thanks for buying it for me, Brooke," Tonks cheered gleefully as we walked on the Training Grounds. I smiled at the pink haired Hufflepuff.

"Of course. You plan on scaring Filch and Miss Norris with it like last time," I asked. Tonks frowned.

"As much as I love to prank those two, I think I need a change of victims..." The girl trailed off as someone caught her eye. I looked up to find Judith practicing her broom surfing. I glanced back at Tonks and saw the impish smile spread on her face. 

Oh no...

"Tonks, I know that look. Don't even think about," I quickly reprimanded the infamous prankster.

"Oh don't be such a spoil sport, Brooke. Her reaction is going to absolutely priceless," Tonks waved off, preparing to throw the Fanged Frisbee.

"Tonks, no-" I watched in horror as the prank item whirled at my best friend.

"JUDITH, LOOK OUT!" Luckily that caught her attention as she was able to evade the frisbee. But she didn't get a chance to rest as the Fanged Frisbee came whistling back round, giving chase. 

Judith looked semi-scared as she did her best to shake off the frisbee as she flew around on her broom. 

Tonks and I readied our wands to put a stop to the fanged prank item before our friend could get seriously hurt, expect we were have a hard time actually hitting the frisbee.

Tonks and I could only watch as the Fanged Frisbee closed in on her from behind.

"Judith, dive," I shouted. Judith didn't waste a second as she dove down. Judith was able to evade the fanged terror... somewhat.

The sound of fanged teeth cutting through hair felt impossibly loud. I couldn't help but to gape in horror as my best friend's hip-length hair was cut semi-choppily and fell to the ground. Tonks managed to cast Immobulous on the Fanged Frisbee but Judith didn't seem to notice. She stared at the ground where her hair fell while raising a shaking hand to her head.

Uh oh. 

I immediately transformed into my red-tailed hawk and flew off. Not before hearing the scream that damn near shook the entire castle.

"BROOKE, TONKS! YOU'RE SO DEAD!"

---

So now I've resorted to hiding until, hopefully, Judith cooled off. 

I've been watching the doors that lead to the Courtyard just in case she comes here looking to rip my tail feathers off...

I was so caught up in my inner turmoil, I nearly fell out of the tree I was in when a giant Golden Eagle landed right next to me. Talbott and I transformed back into our human forms for a moment.

"What did you do this time," Talbott asked bluntly. I gave my fellow Ravenclaw an innocent look.

"What are you talking about? I didn't do anything," I said, doing my best to hide my nervous laughter. Talbott raised a sharp brow at me.

"And I'm sure Judith was yelling that she was gonna kill you and Tonks for kicks," he said. I shuddered in fear. Talbott sighed.

"Brooke-" I clapped my hand over his mouth, looking around in fear.

"SHHH! She'll be listening for my name for all I know," I hissed at the eagle Animagus. He stared at me, completely unamused.

"Whatever you did can't be-"

"BROOKE KELLY BROWN! YOU BETTER BE READY FOR AN ASS WHOOPING YOU’LL NEVER FORGET!" I let out a shriek, transforming back in my bird form and hiding behind a startled Talbott. 

Judith stormed out in the Courtyard, a fire dancing in her pale gold eyes.

Oh Talbott if you love me as a friend, please for all that good and holy, do not tell her where I am...

-----

(Talbott Winger)

After meeting the "Cursed Children of Hogwarts", I knew my life will never be normal.

I was just thankful for meeting Judith first. Even though she and Brooke were just as persistent on being my friend, she was the much calmer one. Brooke tended to be more mischievous and can easily talk my ear off if I let her.

When I heard Judith's cry of pure fury earlier, all the way from the Library mind you, I knew Brooke and Tonks must've been up to no good. Judith isn't the type to explode or get mad easily, so whatever they did must've been a prank.

When the normally calm Hufflepuff stormed into the Courtyard with a glare sharp enough to kill a man, I instantly had an idea what they did. And couldn't help but blush at the difference.

Judith has been growing her hair out over the years. Her thick long curly mane would reach her mid-back in its natural state. But when it was straighten, it would reach her shapely hips. 

I secretly thought she looked beautiful with long hair, silently wishing to play with her long locks. But now, said mane was now cut short. It was a bit choppy, but not in a bad way. She looked cute with short hair...

Her gold eyes scanned the Courtyard for her fearful best friend who was now taking refuge in my hood. Her eyes landed on me and her angry expression melted into something akin to shy embarrassment. She walked up to me slowly.

"H-hey Tal-Talbott," she quietly greeted me. I rose a brow. 

The fact that she can switch from rage to shyness nearly gave me whiplash.

"Hello Judith," I replied. The girl crossed her arms staring at her feet. I couldn't help but find her adorable right now. 

She was wearing her semi-casual class outfit. A black sweater over her white button-down collar and yellow and black tie, a black skirt that reached her knees, dark gray long socks, and her shiny ballet flats. With her short hair, it made seem so much sweeter...

I jumped down, feeling Brooke squirm before quickly settling in my hood. I took a few steps forward until I was standing in front of the cute Hufflepuff.

"Have you seen Brooke around," she quietly asked. 

I felt a nervous twitch on my back. 

Deciding to cover for my fellow Ravenclaw, I shook my head. Silence ensued between the two of us, as Judith still has yet to meet my gaze.

"New haircut," I inquired in an attempt to break the silence. The girl flinched.

"Not by choice. It looks bad, I know," she grumbled. As much as I love her with long hair, I love seeing her like this as well. It brought out her face more, and she looks cuter with the fact it wasn't completely even.

"Who said anything about it looking bad. I think you look rather cute with it," I whispered, twirling a strand between my fingers. Judith looked at me surprised, a hint of color appearing on her face.

"I- um... uh..." I felt a small smile grow on my face.

"Thank you," she squeaked, coming out more like a question rather than a statement. 

Too cute. 

I dropped my hand, silently chuckling.

"D-do me a favor and tell Brooke that we have Quidditch practice l-later, please," she stumbled over her words. I gave her a small smile.

"Sure, anything for you, little bird," I said softly. The girl's blush grew worse as she tucked a couple of loose strands behind her ear.

"Th-Thanks, Talbott. I'll see you later," she mumbled before quickly leaving the Courtyard. A few moments later, Brooke came out of hiding and transformed back into her human form. She pulled me into a tight hug.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!" I felt her squeeze me tighter with each thank you and quickly patted her back, wheezing that she'll break me in half if she hugged me any tighter. 

The Ravenclaw girl released me, giving me a sheepish smile.

"Oh, how I wish I could have you around all the time, Talbott. You managed to disarm her without even trying," she sighed in relief. I rolled my eyes at that. Not that I was looking to in the first place, but I did manage to calm the angry Hufflepuff down quite a bit.

"I don't feel like being your human shield every time you get her mad, Brooke. Remember, you have Quidditch practice with her soon so eventually, you'll be on your own," I pointed out. Brooke paled at that and whimpered. I would love to see how she wriggles her way out of that one...

———

(Orion Amari)

McNully, the Parkin twins, and I awaited our two teammates so we can start practice. Though I sense there might be some minor conflict that could cause a shift of imbalance during today's practice.

If Judith's yell from earlier was an indication...

Judith and I connect very well. 

She may have the strength that Skype prefers and the tactic that appeals to McNully but I noticed she gravitated more on my lessons on balance above everything else. She didn't bat an eye at my methods, whether it be for us to talk as equals by balancing on our broomsticks or even when I taught her how to Inspired Broom Surfing. 

She seems to enjoy not only the challenge but the peace it seems to bring her.

I don't know much about the Curse Vaults but I know it brings her much stress. Helping her clear her mind is definitely something I would gladly do for her whenever she wants.

"OY! Where the hell is Harris and Brown?! They should've been here by now," Skye grumbled, tapping her foot impatiently. Her twin, Hermes, smirked.

"What's the matter, Sky? Eager to get your pasty ass handed to you so soon? Especially after being the Hospital Wing for so long?" The Hufflepuff snarled at her Ravenclaw brother.

"Put a sock in it, will ya?! Now that I'm recovered, I'm gonna mop the floor with you," Skye hissed. McNully simply shook his head at the Parkin Chasers.

"I give it a 98.9% chance this has to do with Judith's death threat earlier," he told me.

"And what could you think to be the reason," I asked the Quidditch commentator. He shrugged his broad shoulders.

"Beats me."

"S-sorry we-we're late, everyone..." came a slightly timid apology. We all turned to find the Ravenclaw Chaser and Hufflepuff Beater in their respected practice uniforms. Brooke, who voiced this apology, was looking away and Judith silently glared daggers at her best friend. 

I blinked in surprise as I took in my Beater.

Judith's hair has been cut drastically short, very similar to my own in fact. I'd always found the Hufflepuff to be alluring with her long, thick mane. Especially when the wind would blow, toying with her locks as she meditated with me or when we simply practicing flying on our brooms together.

Her short hair didn't dampen her beauty but simply changed it in a different light. Her facial features were brought out more due to the cut. Her big gold eyes, her soft cheeks, her slightly sharp jawline...

"Tch, nice haircut Harris," Hermes snorted. The girl shifted her glare over to him, making him slightly flinched.

"We don't have time for a bloody makeover, Judith, we had a Quidditch title to defend," Skye chided.

"Oh, can it both of you! It's not like I asked for a bad hair day," Judith snapped, sending a side-eye to a timid Brooke.

"May I asked what happened exactly," McNully asked politely. Judith sighed, refusing to say anything. Brooke tried not to twitch under her hard stare.

"Let's just say a Fanged Frisbee gone wrong," Brooke vaguely summarized. I let out a hum of understanding as I studied the Hufflepuff Beater. A few strands landed in front of her face. Before Judith could do anything, I carefully brushed her hair behind her ear, allowing my fingertips to lightly caress her cheek. 

The girl blinked at me in surprise, a blush coloring her face.

"I see nothing wrong with it. I think short hair suits you," I said with a smile. The girl couldn't find any words to say after I complimented her.

"S-so, le-let's get to practicing, ye-yeah," the Hufflepuff Beater offered. I silently chuckled at her attempt to change the subject but appeased her nonetheless.

It didn't escape my attention however when Brooke shot me a grateful look.

———

"Oh boy, definitely need a Wiggenweld Potion," Brooke winced as practice concluded. 

Judith showed no mercy, hitting Bludgers with deadly accuracy. She managed to nail Hermes and Brooke quite a number of times, much to Skye's delight, but I can still sense some level of unbalance coming from her.

"Judith, may I speak with you. Alone," I called out to her. Murphy and Skye shrugged, Brooke looked relieved (more or less running out of the stadium, despite her injuries) and Hermes smirked making kissing noises in our direction. Judith looked very peeved, as well as a bit flustered, at that and looked ready to jump the male but I held her back with a steady hand on her shoulder.

"Come now, it wouldn't be long. I promise," I whispered gently to her. Her face did a funny little spasm as her blush grew worse, but she relented. When the others cleared out, I turned Judith so she could face me. The girl stubbornly looked at my chest. I let out a sigh and tilted her chin up so she could look at me.

"Something troubles you. What's wrong," I softly asked.

"It's stupid. One of the few days I actually could relax, I get chased by a rogue Fanged Frisbee thanks to Tonks and Brooke and now I have a haircut that makes me look more like a boy. I'm already insecure about myself as is, this just put me in a foul mood," the girl admitted. 

My gaze softened at the Hufflepuff witch. 

Tentatively, I cupped her cheek, brushing my thumb under her eye.

"Long or short, your hair doesn't define your beauty, Judith. I'm not speaking to you out of concern a captain has for his teammate, but simply as a wizard expressing himself to a witch. I truly mean when I say you're an alluring girl," I whispered to her. I leaned in pressed a small kiss on her hairline. I heard her let out a shaky breath. Pulling away, her eyes were closed and the blush darkened.

Her gold eyes fluttered open to meet my dark brown ones. She gave me a shy smile.

"Th-Thank you, Orion," she said quietly. I hummed softly and stepped back to give her some space. She asked if she could leave now and I gave her a smile and nodded, saying I'll see her around. She gifted me with one last small smile before walking out of the stadium. I heard the grass being crunched under a set of wheels.

"You seriously could've made the poor girl faint you know," I heard McNully say. I turned to him with a guileless smile.

"You know that I have no shame expressing how I feel. I feel a connection towards the girl, simple as that," I said. The commentator rolled his eyes and chuckled.

-----------------

(Andre Egwu)

I was in the Ravenclaw Common Room studying one of Murphy's playbooks. I really want to be a better Seeker so I can actually play on the Ravenclaw Quidditch team. I want to make my grandmother proud... and Judith as well.

The witch never had to reach out to help me, especially since she's on the Hufflepuff team. But she helped introduced me to Murphy so I can learn and strategy wizard himself. I was actually surprised how friendly those two were with each other, which means they've been working closely for quite a while. I remember the kind smile she sent my way when she promised that this is will help me become a better Seeker.

She had such a beautiful smile. Among a lot of features.

Her smooth chocolate skin.

Her delicately sculpted face.

Her athletically fit (and slightly curvy) body.

Her bright gold eyes.

Her long dark hair.

I sighed dreamily.

"Whatcha sighing about, Andre?" A very familiar voice spoke. I jumped to find Judith standing close to the couch I resided on. I blinked in surprise.

Judith blew a strand of her now short hair from her face as she looked at me curiously. Suddenly her battle cry from earlier today makes so much more sense...

Along with Brooke's frantic running in and out (with a bunch of snacks and candy in hand) of the Common Room, yelling if anyone needed her she'll be in the Gryffindor Common Room...

I can understand Judith's anger, but...

It's not as bad as she thinks it is...

"Andre?" I snapped back to reality as the Hufflepuff rose a brow at me. I blushed.

"Sorry, sorry... I was caught up in studying these playbooks," I partially lied through the skin of my teeth. I felt my entire face grow hot. She let out a soft hum.

"Alright," she finally said. I let out a soft sigh of relief. I stood to take a closer look at the girl.

"Cute haircut, whose your stylist," I commented, ruffling her hair playfully. The girl stared at me, surprise overtaking her features.

"I was half expecting you to find this bad," she said, running through her fingers through the choppy cut to fix it. I shook my head.

"You looked good with how your hair was before, but you look very cute with this cut," I said honestly. The Hufflepuff Prefect chuckled and hugged me around the waist. I blushed and wrapped my arms around her. The sweet smell of her shampoo wafted up my nose. Mmm... cocoa butter and coconuts...

I felt a dopey grin spread on my face.

Dear Gods if this is a dream, don't wake me up...

Unfortunately, the girl pulled away.

"I wanted to ask you something," she said. The warmth of her hug and the sweet smell still left me in a slight delirious euphoria. So I didn't hesitate to answer.

"Sure, anything..."

"Do you by any chance know where Brooke is?"

"She went to the Gryffindor Common Room," I said, unknowingly ratting Brooke out to her possibly vengeful best friend. Said best friend gave me a giant smile and another hug.

"Thank you, Andre," she said, and was there a slight purr in her voice? She turned on her heel and walked out of the room, leaving me alone once again.

Sighs... so worth it...

----------------

(Brooke Brown)

Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit!

Once I get my hands on Egwu, I'm gonna clobber him!

...Assuming I survive my best friend's wrath...

I glanced at Bill, who was basically yeeted across the room to keep Judith from entering the room. He ended up hitting an armchair, which toppled backward. I forgot how strong my best friend was...

I silently whimpered at the sight of Judith smirking down at me.

"L-l-let's not do-do anything drastic n-now...! I-I'm sure we can t-talk about this, haha haha haha pleasedon'thurtme," I said as I shrunk into the couch. Judith remained quiet for a moment before chuckling. I shut my eyes.

Oh no...

Goodbye world, it was nice knowing you...

"Relax, will ya? I'm not gonna hurt you..." I cracked open one eye.

"Really," I asked quietly.

"Well not really..." Not helping!

"You can say that the short hair kinda grew on me, so I'm gonna spare you from anything drastic," she said.

"Wha-But-How-" The short Hufflepuff gave me a small smile with a slight blush on her face.

"You can say I received some votes of confidence today," she said softly, brushing a few strands behind her ear. I thought back. Talbott. Orion. Andre.

I smirked and snickered.

Apparently, that was the wrong move as Judith's eyes sharpened into a glare. I 'eeped' as she leaned in close to my face.

"Even so, I'm not spending x amount of years just to regrow my hair. You gonna find a way to help me grow it back or else. Got it," she whispered. I nodded frantically. She gave me a lazy smirk.

"Good. See ya at dinner, bestie," she said, pulling away and walking out of the room. Once she was gone, I went over to check to make sure that Bill was okay while mentally wondering how can I convince Penny to brew me some kind of hair potion...

[mrs-nate-humphrey]

you touched on it in that other ask, but i’m curious now: what do you imagine dan and serena’s marriage would be like? (based off of canon mostly, but ignoring gossip dan because fuck that lol) i’m not sure i personally see their marriage as loveless the way i understand that word (and do believe nair’s marriage would be), but more… extremely dysfunctional and chaotic? and i’m very interested in more of your thoughts about them!

this got SO LONG lkfdhlkgfg im SO sorry. under the cut

the really sad thing about derena in s5/s6 to me is that they're both actively looking for something in each other that just isn't there anymore. of course, we don't know what happened during that 5 year time gap. and 5 years is a lot - it's as much time as the whole show up to the flash-forward. this makes the ending really weird and ambiguous, in the sense of like. they could hypothetically have fallen in love all over again in those five years, and maybe it was a real love.

but:

1. how many times? they've gotten together and broken up somewhere between 4-6 times in canon, i can't remember the exact number. i think after a point you need to realise that if you're trying THAT many times and still not able to meet each other's needs, it's just not going to happen.

2. that absolutely bizarre wedding. i did NOT get the sense of two people in love getting married at that wedding. it felt like there was something else going on there - like they had a secret and they were getting married to protect it, or something.

i would use the word loveless for the DS marriage because i feel like as far as romantic love goes, that ship has sailed? (this is different from loveless for NB where i don't think either of them has ever been in love with the other & they probably never will fall in love either.) like i don't see dan and serena looking at each other and feeling like you! you're everything to me or whatever else. but given how whenever things go wrong, they both immediately go to each other, i feel like they wouldn't be as dysfunctional/ toxic as like. a dangina endgame or something. they both trust each other in a way they don't trust anybody else!! that's really something.

the one good thing i can imagine (RIP) is that they'd probably have decent sex because that's what canon implies; their sexual chemistry was so good that even when everything else was falling apart for them they were having fun in bed. after a point though i think it'd stop being meaningful sex. and i think they'd gradually do it less and less.

unfortunately, the way they look at each other in s1 and smile at each other and enjoy being with each other... by the time we're in s6, that's more or less absolutely demolished. but at the same time, we've seen them be truly honest with each other when they're saying absolutely brutal stuff, like serena's 'i think sometimes i test you to see if you will leave' thing in s4. we've seen them choose each other when it doesn't make sense for them to do so - like dan sticking with serena after her dad abandons them in s3, driving with her for them to say bye to her dad despite how much william fucked things up for rufus. so what i'm trying to say is that, i don't..... know? what derena will really be like?? their dynamic has always had a specific durability & endurance to it, and they've always cared about each other and wanted each other to be happy, so i would hope parts of that remain despite the damage.

i would see them struggling to decide what kind of life they want to live. serena would want to travel or live somewhere disconnected from the city, like a village or a quaint town, but dan is a city boy through and through, like a fish in water, he would be so miserable if you took him away from there. i imagine dan would want kids, but serena absolutely hands down would not. i think if she got pregnant she'd keep it, though, for dan, but i don't see that arc going well for her - i don't think she'd be able to handle being a mother, and i think it'd probably lead to a very messy divorce, because i don't see serena being able to walk out on her kid (her dad did that to her and she KNOWS what it's like), but at the same time, she's clearly not happy, and i think dan would be more than happy to be a single dad.

i think dan and serena are just, re: what they're looking for in life, very incompatible, and it'd show up a lot if they get married - they would fight and argue over how much money they're spending on what ('we don't need another car, serena') or what sort of activities they're going to do ('you can make friends with a club membership, dan') and i think it'd be. not very happy for both of them.

@mysteriesofloves 's fic 'harbour lights' describes that very specific genre of discontent / dissatisfied that i think dan and serena would be, tbh. it's a sad read, but it felt SO true to me. secondaudrina's fic dear so-and-so - it's been very long since i read this, but it's a classic for a reason.

i have a lot of feelings about d&s. like. i think they love each other. i think they genuinely care about each other. but sometimes that's not enough!!! maybe it was enough when both of them were 17, but you don't stay that age forever. the world is different when you're in high school as opposed to when you're in your 20s making big decisions that dictate the shape of your life. and i think for dan and serena the real heartbreak is realising that even though they love each other so much, they still can't be the person the other needs. they can't build a future together, because they're going in different directions. oh whoops i just referenced my own fic here LKHFDLKHG.

they would try, though. they would try so hard. they would always mean the apologies they give each other, it'd never be insincere. they would do so many considerate things for each other. they'd take care of each other if one of them fell sick. dan would maybe teach serena how to cook. they'd split household work and serena wouldn't even mind.

but they're not in love anymore. and something's always missing. they both feel somehow empty, despite having gotten here.

& when they fight, it's terrible. when you know someone as well as dan knows serena or serena knows dan, you know all their weak points. their achilles heel, their insecurities, etc. you can really hurt them (that thing serena says in hellseason s6 about the ones who love us knowing how to hurt us best? that). i think there would be plenty of cutting remarks, raised voices, and crying. i don't think either of them would get physical with each other, though (i do see serena maybe pushing dan away, but i don't think she'd hit him or anything like that.)

i just don't think their marriage would be sustainable, tbh, based off what we've seen in canon for them, at least. the real question is what happened during that 5 year flash forward? because if it's more of the same patterns as 2007 - 2012 repeating, then, yeah, derena is damned. but if they actively unlearnt some things, maybe got relationship counselling (& therapy, individually).... i don't know. maybe they grew up. maybe they can break out of those patterns. i don't really see it, tbh. but anything can happen in 5 years in the gg universe.

[crimsonfacets]

💘 Jiggies this in here for the demon wifes uwu

send me 💘 + A SHIP and i’ll tell you—

where they first met and how

When Vaggie fell into Hell, she was drowning in a sea of tormented souls. It was a nightmare, and it was very, very painful. Charlie was the one who helped pull her to the surface and the first to hold her, as well as comfort her. It was a very impactful first meeting that led to Vaggie forming a very powerful trust in Charlie from the get-go, and for someone like her, that sort of thing is hard to achieve.

how long their ‘flirting’ phase was before feelings got involved

Long! Playful flirtations were part of their aesthetic, but of course, somewhere along the way, things got very, very real.

who fell for who first ( if applicable )

They’re a tale as old as time in Hell, because both started falling just around the same time. I’m not sure what happened, but I feel as though some sort of event happened with the two of them that begun their slip into a very deep, very true love with one another. I think it’d be fun to figure out what exactly happened. :)c

where their first date was and what it was like

I feel like Charlie might have suggested a bowling alley due to being so flustered, so their first date was at one of the most flashy and theatric bowling alleys in the First Ring. A very neon-palette place! Very fun, honestly. Vaggie wasn’t too sure about it since she’d never been bowling before, but they ended up having a blast! Vaggie even asked what took them both so long to do this. 

Afterwards, they both went for a drive to one of the best lookout points in Pentagram City and spent a few hours sitting atop the limo just.. snuggled up, and talking. Razzle and Dazzle wrapped them up with a shared blanket before leaving them to have their privacy. It was really nice, and they both just flatout fell asleep like that and woke up in Charlie’s room.

who asks who out and how ( with a sign? spelled out on a cake? just a simple ‘will you go out with me’? )

While I vibe with their canon story of them just having clicked together, I feel like after they both confessed, Charlie asked Vaggie out with panache; an enormous display of flowers formed into a heart with Vaggie’s name spelled out in the middle. Tons of stuffed toys and balloons. Cute cupcakes with little purple moths and goats on them. A bouquet of roses and being down on one knee.

Vaggie was very overwhelmed, but she loved it so much.

who proposes first

Charlie, for sure. Vaggie doesn’t have the confidence for it.

if they keep / kept their relationship secret or let everyone know right away

Pfff, as if they’d keep their love a secret. They’re proud of their love and are not hiding it! Everyone knew they were an item almost right away. Vaggie was a little nervous when it came to Charlie’s parents though, but Lilith&Lucifer had already far accepted her as a member of the family unbeknownst to her. The friendship she’s had with Charlie has a history and a fond one at that, so she’s been in the Magne fold for quite some time now. It was no shock to either of them that they both wound up like this.

where the proposal happens and how ( kiss cam at a baseball game? on a hillside surrounded by ducks? at a disney park? )

On Vaggie’s birthday. Charlie always does Vaggie’s birthday up big, even if it’s a closed event with just the two of them, plus R&D. This time, Charlie’s taken Vaggie up top to the Mortal Realm and they’re having a wonderful dinner in a very luxurious suite at a hotel that Vaggie has always wanted to stay in but had the funds to. It’s a private event and it’s a dream.

Charlie uses her magic and she summons some fireworks to enchant her beloved, and while she’s distracted, she gets on one knee and takes out a very gorgeous ring in an onyx band. Vaggie immediately senses something is going on, something more than it seems, and glances down, and nearly jumps out of her skin before immediately having tears just pour down her cheeks as she covers her mouth.

When Charlie pops the question, she even uses Vaggie’s real name. Priscilla López.

Of course, Vaggie says yes after tackling Charlie and smothering her in teary, teary kisses.

if they adopt any pets together

Maybe in the future when things are more stabilized and less at risk. A pet’s a big responsibility and they’re both very busy girls right now who are constantly on the go, and neither are irresponsible. I think a pet that’s independent could be good for them if they both wanted one, like perhaps a very regal and very lethal Hell Feline that’s warmed up to the both of them and incredibly loyal, and very protective. THAT could be cute. 

who’s more dominant

I feel like they switch, to be honest? One’s usually in the mood to take control, but they definitely have their moments where they’re both in the mood and “fight” for it lol. 

where their first kiss was and what it was like

Akin to the proposal being on Vaggie’s birthday, I like to think it was on Charlie’s birthday when they first kissed, brought on by Vaggie. She stole her Princess away from the crowd and used the Witching Hour to take Charlie to the mortal realm for an hour. There, she kissed Charlie under the stars, and it blew her mind. ♥

if they have any matching couples stuff ( mugs? sweaters? pillowcases? )

They have so much of this already people STRUGGLE with ideas of what to get them for their wedding. They have cups, they have pillowcases, they have shirts, they have shoes, they have bracelets, they have dinnerware, they have SO MUCH. SO MUCH.

It’s obvious they’re really into this. Like, really into it. Very sappy couple. 

how into pda they are

Incredibly. They do not care who sees them, they’re going to snog and snuggle in public as much as they want - they refuse to censor themselves or feel ashamed of their affections. It’s very common to see their arms linked, or seeing one wrapped around the other’s waist. Kisses and getting lost in one another’s attention is something they’re prone to do, Lilith bless ‘em.

who holds the umbrella when it rains

I feel like Charlie does this and Vaggie thinks it’s the sweetest thing. Leave it to her babe to always be prepared.

where their usual ‘date spot’ is ( if applicable )

Going with the first date, I think their fallback is that bowling alley for fun. It’s just an enjoyable locale overall where they can just kick back and enjoy the food, the fun and the atmosphere. There’s a skating rink conjoined to the place, so it’s not strictly bowling - they love to go skating, too!

This is subject to change of course if it’s not fitting for Charlie, it’s just what I drummed up. c: Essentially, a really neat Arcade in Hell.

No I am not imagining them taking their kids to the skating rink for the first time and skating as a family. No, I am not crying about it.

who’s more protective

Vaggie is incredibly protective (as the Pilot has shown us!), but when it comes to serious dangers, Charlie is the Princess of Hell and it shows. She’s kind, but she won’t let anyone disrespect her wife. You don’t take shit from other demons, and you certainly don’t let them treat your wife like it.

how long it is before they sleep together ( can be as in ‘had sex’ or as in ‘shared a bed’ )

They’ve shared a bed before since the earlier days of their friendship! They’ve always been pretty comfortable together, even if the thought gave Charlie internal *BI PANIC*. When it comes to intimacy, however, they slipped during their friendship stage. They’d been good friends for a while (at least a year in) then suddenly whoops, they became friends with benefits after a little too much flirtation and a little too much sexual tension went overboard!

if they argue about anything

They have disagreements, but they never let it escalate into arguments. They hear each other out and they talk civil, handling it maturely. No emotional screaming, no misunderstandings.

who leaves more marks ( lipstick, hickeys, scratchmarks etc. )

Oh, Vaggie for sure. She absolutely adores marking what’s hers and letting the entire world know just who Charlie belongs to.

who steals whose clothes and how often

Charlie loves to steal Vaggie’s clothes, especially her jackets and coats. Their styles are different; Charlie’s formal and snappy, and Vaggie’s more stylish and on the gothic side. She’s a little obsessed with her white feather jacket, and Vaggie just thinks that’s adorable. Meanwhile, Vaggie adores wearing Charlie’s dress shirts as sleep shirts. ♥

how they cuddle ( spooning? facing each other? )

Tucked into one another. They like zero space between one another when they cuddle! One head beneath the other’s chin, limbs all wrapped around the other. A sentient knot with fingers lost in hair and lips pressed to the top of the other’s crown. If not like this, their faces are mushed together. 

what their favourite nonsexual activity is

Besides affection? They really enjoy dancing together, and playing games where they get to be on the same team! They work very well together, if not sometimes losing focus because Charlie ends up goofing off and Vaggie ends up falling right after her lmao. 

But, dancing. Dancing steals the top spot, for sure. They could get lost in dancing together easily, and lose sight of everything around them just as much.

how long they stay mad at each other

Not long at all. Feels bad, man. They refuse to go a day where they’re on the wrong foot, going to bed on bad terms just does not settle well in their book.

what their usual coffee / tea orders are

I feel like they both like their coffee the same; black with a few spoonfuls of sugar. It’s shocking because people expect Charlie to like it super sweet, but she needs that pep to last her through the day, and Vaggie’s the same exact way. The stronger, the better! But it always needs sugar because they love that sweet note. They’ll always have a dessert tagged with it too, though. It changes, from fresh baked snickerdoodles to eclairs.

Tea, on the other hand, changes. They experiment and are always trying new blends! They’ll usually get whatever the place is serving as House rec. As a default though for home, they do enjoy their Darjeeling. Also, these girls take their tea time very seriously, especially when it’s been a chaotic week.

if they ever have any children together

Eventually, yes! Vaggie has her own issues to get through first; she’s not sure she could be worth a damn as a mother since her own screwed up with her own upbringing so royally, but with enough assurances and talking, she’ll come around. The idea of them both being mothers makes her heart flutter. :’)

I like the thought of them having a bunch of daughters, but I like the thought of them having just one, too. Depends on what we’re feeling if we get to that point! <3

if they have any special pet names for each other

Of course they do! Terms of endearment are regularly used between these two. Vaggie usually calls Charlie, “Mi Princesa”, while Charlie calls her a whole litter of names every day of the week. Sugarbear, Honeycup, Sweetie-face, Apple of my Eye.. you name it. Vaggie, astoundingly, keeps up and is impressed Charlie has not run out of anything yet.

if they ever split up and / or get back together

NO.

red is not a fan of these tropes and will avoid them like the plague.

what their shared living space is like ( messy? clean? what kind of decor? )

Clean with decorative clutter. It’s a very cool clash of worlds, with Charlie’s classy style and Vaggie’s more darker aesthetic. They have creepy-cute plushies everywhere and canopies galore in red, black and purple. The air seems to sparkle. It’s a bedroom befitting the Princess of Hell, molded with her lover. 

You have walls filled with posters of Charlie’s favorite musicals and memorabilia, and Vaggie’s more.. suggestive wall art and gothic posters ranging from original work she purchased to bands. There’s a wall they decorated themselves with their own graffiti and have tacked on lots of special things they both like!

There’s a corner of the room that serves as their online area; it’s a swerving black glass table with one computer that is Vaggie’s, and next to it is Charlie’s. Their areas are very personalized, but they have two little funko pop figures of themselves meeting at the middle of their sections that they mess with and change the positions of.

The bed is, of course, vast in size. Very comfortable, like laying on a mattress filled with feathers, which makes it very hard for Vaggie to get out of bed in the morning. The general blanket is black with a holographic effect that gives it a red and purple gradient, and the white sheets below are satin with the same property. There’s a lot of big, plump pillows too - black with gradients ranging from unicorns to moths and rainbows, depending on how the casing. 

They have a balcony they have their tea time on, with a black iron wrought table and chairs to fit. A porcelain tea set gifted from Lilith with an apple theme, although the cups were purchased by the girls. “Hers&Hers” theme along with the setting, from washable napkins to the silverware. To boot, the bottom of the tea cups say “I love you”. 

what their first christmas / hanukkah / etc as a couple was like

Wholesome. They’ve always had their Christmases together ever since they started bonding real tight, but this domestic vibe was added when they’d begun dating. It’s the same, nothing much has changed, but now there’s themes of romance and kisses beneath the mistletoe. 

It was very warm and tender. A very pleasant memory in both their minds, memories from the gift exchanges to preparing a dinner for four (themselves + R&D), then later visiting Charlie’s parents at the Castle. 

Vaggie loves the memory so much. She still can’t believe she can have a very beautiful Holiday like this in Hell, but Charlie’s here proving to her that it’s possible time and again.

what their names are in each other’s phones

On Vaggie’s phone: “💖 👑 𝓟𝓻𝓲𝓷𝓬𝓮𝓼𝓪 👑 💖 💍”

On Charlie’s phone: “💞 🥰 It’s Vaggie!! 🥰 💞 💍 ✨” 

if they have any ‘couple traditions’ ( buying a new mug for their collection every year? baking every friday evening? )

Tea time, as mentioned before. Tea time is so crucial for both their peace of mind and generally for having a really lovely time together that’s like a mini-date-at-home. It’s a dedicated moment they both use to slow their roll and take stock, too. They both get so caught up in the business of getting the Hotel up-and-running they can oft neglect important things like eating and drinking, and just, you know, taking a break. R&D stick them to it and pull them out of their busy bee mindsets. :’>

who falls asleep first and who wakes up first

My girl falls asleep FAST, but I feel like Charlie’s always the first to wake up and usually Vaggie’s own personal wake-up call!

who’s the big spoon / little spoon

They switch! Sometimes you’ll find Vaggie draped over Charlie, other times you’ll find Charlie wrapped up around the tiny lilac-gray ball that is Vaggie.

who hogs the bathroom

Their bathroom is enormous! There is no hogging, there’s using it at the same time! It’s honestly cute and hilarious to watch them both fuss around while groggily chattering, sometimes clattering together to use the mirror even though it’s like, six feet long. They just gravitate to one another and clog the other’s space, mushed together. It’s handy though, because usually they’ll help one another with brushing hair and fixing clothes!

who kills the spiders / takes them outside

It depends on who gets there first! Although Charlie’s gotten Vaggie into the habit of sparing their HELLISH little lives, she still prefers to be the one who shoos them out in case Vaggie just says, “fuck it” and SQUASHES. Hell Spiders are no laughing matter - They’ll Fuck You Up.

[victorie552onepiecespeedrun]

Reading One Piece pt 179: Everything Happens So Much

Chapters 425-426

Thoughts:

- Fpos/cs: Oh look, It’s Waipa. He’s living in the Holy Land :)

- Enies Lobby is basically hell on Earth right now

- Lol, everyone’s standing and waiting for Luffy :D

- (Luffy, finish your fight faster!)

- Sanji: “yo, there’s as many warships as us here. That’s bad.” Well, it is. I halfway thought you propose they all will destroy one ship each. Eh, we’re at page 3, there’s still hope *crosses fingers*

- News from the front

- …oh

- Did Frankies and the rest really actually die like for real

- Anyway, shit

- Oh Franky…

- “The number of survivors on the Enies Lobby main island… is zero.” Franky. Franky. Government lies, Franky

- The whole island was obliterated basically

- “The only target left is the Bridge of Hesitation” !!!!!!

- whoops

- Everyone is SAD :(

- At least they had people who mourn them now

- “…Can people die so easily?” “You cannot see humans on the map” we should

- Now Franky is MAD and yelling at Luffy (who can’t hear him) TO HURRY THE **** UP so Frankies death won’t be in vain

- Luffy and Lucci fighting

- Eh, whatever, I’m done with this fight. Now this fight needs to be done with me

- Oof

- No seriously finish this, Straw Hats don’t even see that fight, they just see smoke and hear Kaboom

- “Sometimes it’s like as if Luffy knows who to fight… from the very beginning…” well, yeah, he identifies the strongest and goes for it, Chopper. It’s his goddamn right as a shounen protagonist

- “He… wouldn’t die, would he?” “Idiot” and that’s that on that :D. It’s actually reassuring, you know

- The heck

- Marines decided they want in on Luffy vs. Lucci and that’s RUDE and Zoro should teach them the etiquette of battle, seriously

- Whoops, we all saw that coming v

“All ships: form a battle formation around the Bridge of Hesitation. We have confirmed that there are nine pirates including Pirate Hunter Zoro and Nico Robin on the bridge and the convoy”

- :D they mentioned Zoro :D

- (I’m sorry, I have a one-track mind :D)

- (Robin could use a title too)

- Marines are scared :D as they should :D

- !!!! NOW they can see Luffy vs. Lucci in all its glory!

- More importantly, Luffy can see them too :)  

- :D :D :D that’s what I’m talking about

- No but seriously is Zoro an expert on battle now, he says all that cool battle stuff and they listen without a word of protest

- “…in the end, this is what it comes down to – a game of endurance…” he’s like that ex-president on TV I watched the other day, he says the same thing everyone is thinking but 10 times better

- And of course Luffy will win that game. He has something to fight for

- Lol

- These warships are practically on them :D it’s Straw Hats time to ignore a cannon right at their face

- “yo, small fry marines, don’t you dare get close to the fight” I can’t imagine they would want to, Vice-Admiral

- “Th… There’s so many of them!” “It’s simply proof that they’re scared of us!” Usopp, Zoro, never change :D

- Huh!? Where’s Sanji!?

- Chopper still can’t move!

- AND MARINES ARE ATTACKING!!!

- Um what

- …

- WHAT

- DID THAT RANDOM GUY JUST ///BROKE/// ONE OF ZORO’S SWORDS?????

- AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

- Marines got few devil fruit users with them. I thought these guys are rare, why are they everywhere now

- Luckily, Straw Hats got a devil fruit user too :) deck them Robin

- “Keep holding on until Luffy gets here!” LUFFY HURRY

- Luffy, damn it, Lucci started monologuing, STOP THAT

- …what

- Did Luffy just fell

- Luffy. LUFFY. Lucci isn’t Crocodile, you can’t just FALL STOP SCARING ME

- !!!!

- …holy shit you guys, Sogeking was Usopp all along

 O_O

rOP 178  rOP 180

[wildflowergrant]

jealous 

pairing: ethan dolan x reader, platonic!kyle x reader

A/n: Ok but this kind made me swerve to kyle’s lane whoops (pls send in more lol) also sorry in advance cuz this is unedited 😬

You were always closer to Ethan than Grayson, mostly because you liked him. A lot. Maybe a bit too much. Your feelings came up to you here and there when you were teens, and you even broke up with your ex boyfriend because he told you that he doesn’t want you hanging out with Ethan anymore. But now, you can’t control it.

Now, you moved into LA with the twins from the money you made from creating videos on YouTube. You always had them on your daily vlogs and your fans always shipped you and Ethan, which encouraged your feelings for him to get stronger.

But all of that was crushed when you walked into his room and he was fixing his hair. You sat on his bed while he was looking in the mirror.

“Where are you going?” He looked at you through the mirror and smiled a bit.

“I have a date.” You could feel your heart stop and crack in half.

Even though you had heartache, you still tried to play it cool. “Really? With who?”

“Do you remember Miranda? You’ve met her before.”

“Oh, yeah that’s right. You guys hit it off well.” You hates that she was nice. If she wasn’t then you would’ve been more mad, but she didn’t do anything wrong. Ethan walked over to his closet and put on his perfume.

“Ok, I’m gonna head out now.” You walked him out and watched as he drove away and you waved each other goodbye. Once you got inside, you sighed loudly, not realizing that you were holding your breath. And definitely not realizing Kyle smirking at you from the couch.

“Tough love?” You gave him a saddened expression and went to sit next to him.

You put your head in your hands. “I don’t even know, Kyle. I thought that he liked me back.”

He put his arms over your shoulder and rubbed your back. “Hey, Y/n. If he doesn’t see how gorgeous you are, then he’s not worth it. You deserve better than this.” Your head went up and you turned around to hug him.

“Thank you so much. And I’m sorry that I don’t like you back.” He told you many times how much he likes you, and you always feel bad when you don’t feel that same way. The last time he told you was a week ago and you didn’t really respond nicely to him.

“It’s ok, Y/n. You can’t force yourself to love someone. And your heart belongs to Ethan, I get it.” You two pulled away from each other and he smirked at you. “But it wouldn’t hurt to show him what he’s missing.”

“What do you mean.”

“We could do couple-ey things you know? Like go out and eat, be a little more affectionate.”

You took a second to process. “Ohh ok. But purely platonic, right?”

He nodded his head. “Of course. You set boundaries, and I won’t go over them.”

“And this is ok with you?” He nodded again. “Ok, I don’t see why not.” Ethan is already going out with someone else, he wouldn’t be mad about you two.

“Great.  Well, we can start by going out to eat because I’m starving.” 

“Ok, let me just put on something other than pj shorts.”  You quickly put on leggings and a hoodie and headed outside with Kyle.

You guys went to In n Out and sat down when you guys waited for your order.  You two sat close to each other- maybe a little too close- talking about anything.  And what you guys didn’t notice was a group of girls looking over at you and taking pictures of you.

When your order was called out, he offered to get the food while you were sitting down waiting.  You got a text from Ethan, asking if you wanted to hang out.

Y/n: Aren’t you on a date?

Ethan: Yeah, but I’m talking about after my date

Y/n:

Which is when?

Ethan:

idk

Y/n:

well I'm kinda hanging out with Kyle tonight

read 10:33

It took him about five minutes to reply.

Ethan:

K

You rolled your eyes and looked up to see Kyle holding a tray of food and two cups of soda.  A smiled appeared on your face and you got the drinks and set up the food.  He sat next to you and put his hands around your shoulder while eating the fries.

“He text me.” You saw his fist tighten up for a second but he let go.

“What did he say?” You shrugged and finished eating. “He asked me to hang out after, but he’s still on his date.”  

“Why would he text you when he’s on a date still?” “I don’t know.  But I just told him that I’m hanging out with you tonight.”

You two kept on eating and when you were finished, you headed back to his car.  You told him didn’t want to go back home yet, so he said that he would take the long way home.

There was loud music that yo were singing along to and he was laughing so hard you thought that he was going to swerve.  He lowered the music and went on to talk.

“Hey, do you want to have a movie night?” Your eyes widened and excitement filled your body. “Oh my god yeah.  Wait, pull over we need too get snacks.” He laughed and pulled into the Ralph’s parking lot.

“Ok, you get the microwave popcorn and I’ll get the drinks.” He nodded and let go of your hand.

When you were walking down the aisle you heard someone gasp beside you.

“Oh my god, I love your videos so much.”  You immediately smiled.

“Thank  you! You’re too cute.” You can tell she was a bit nervous, so you tried to calm her down a bit.  “Do you want to take a picture?”  She nodded her head and gave her phone to her mom.  You two posed and she looks a few photos.

After that, her nerves were gone and she asked you “So, what are you doing?”

“Oh, I’m just having a movie night with my friend, considering all the candy I have.” You held up the candy but you put it down when you felt a hand gently go on the small of your back.

“Hey, I’m back.”  You turned around and saw Kyle looking down at you with a box of popcorn on his other hand.

You looked back at her and you saw her eyes go between you, Kyle, and the hand on your back.You could already hear the ‘that should be Ethan’ coming from her eyes.

“Well, we got to go and pay for these things.  It was nice meeting you!” “You too!”  You two turned to her and started walking but you didn’t see her take a photo of you and Kyle with his arm around your shoulders.

After a few minutes of driving you guys were finally home and cooked all the popcorn and you set up the candy on the coffee table.  When you guys decided what movie to play, you put your head on his shoulder and he has his arm wrapped around you.  You noticed that he likes putting his arms around you, so you took a mental note on that.

“Hey Kyle?”

“Hm?”

“Thank you.  I really had a fun time today.  Really.  It’s nice hanging out with someone without thinking if you should stay friends or if you really want to tell them how you feel.” “Same.  I’m glad that we’re doing this.  And I thought that I wouldn’t like it considering I liked you, but I actually like being your friend rather than.. you know.” While the credits rolled and most of the candy was finished, you fell asleep on him, and he wasn’t complaining, so he fell asleep on the couch too.

Ethan came back in the house expecting you to still be awake and waiting for him so that you two can go on a late night ride, but his hopes were crushed when he saw you sleeping on the couch, head rested on Kyle and his arms around you.  

It’s like a huge truck hit him right there. He was jealous of Kyle. He wanted to be in Kyle’s position, but he’s not, so he quickly went to his room to go to sleep.

And this went on for weeks. He decided to stay with Miranda, even though he wanted Y/n. But she seems to be busy with him.

Some fans. Ok, well all of the fans saw this too. The picture of you and Kyle that the fan took in the grocery store went viral and there were mixed reactions to it. Some liked you two together and even made a ship name while others still wanted you to be with Ethan. And Ethan saw a lot of them. He was tagged in almost every pic that people took of them hanging out and being way too close on his opinion.

Even in the first week, you were hanging out with Kyle a lot more than Ethan. Almost as if he replaced him.

One night, he heard your giggling and his laughs from across the halls and he couldn’t help but look and make sure nothing was happening.

Ethan tried to play it cool and act as if he was going to get a cup of water. He peeked through your door and saw that you two were on the bed, looking at some video. Nothing bad. Until he saw that arm wrapped around you. His blood was slowly boiling and he wanted to rip that arm off of him. A bit violent, but he really wanted to.

The next morning, he saw that you posted a new picture. When he went to you account and saw you and Kyle together. He didn’t want to look at it, but the little voice in his head told him to look. He tapped on the picture it showed you slightly leaning on a sink with a huge hoodie, hair up, and you had a green face mask on. Right behind you was Kyle and he had his hair tied with one of your scrunchies and he had the same green face mask on. When Ethan looked closer, he could see his other arm on her waist.

After a few hours, he was on his explore page and he saw thousands of the same pictures. And again, that little voice told him to look at them. All of them. He wasn’t much for going on Instagram for a long time, but he made an exception. He read all the captions and the were a lot of people freaking out.

“Oh my god guys look at his hand.”

“Ok but why do I kind of ship them together now.”

“Ugh this is literal relationship goals.”

“It’s so cute how he has one of her scrunchies in his hair.”

And one after another, they got worse.

“Ok I prefer her to be with Kyle than Ethan.”

“Ethan who?”

“Looks like Ethan was replaced.”

“Guys she’s wearing his hoodie isn’t that cute.”

That one killed him. A knife right to his heart. He swiped to see a pic of Kyle in the same hoodie you were wearing in your post.  Ethan was so upset that you were letting this happen.  Usually you would only let Ethan be close to you like that, but Kyle?  That was unheard of.  Of course, you two were good friends and he would help film for some of you videos, but nothing other than that.

He decided that he shouldn’t  dwell too much on it, and that it would go away soon.  And although it was horrible of him to do that, he kept on dating Miranda to keep his mind off of things.

The next day, you were going out with your friends to eat out and shop, while Grayson told him t come with him for brunch.  He woke up to an empty house and got ready to meet Gray at their usual breakfast spot.  When he got there, he was greeted by the last person he wanted to meet.  Kyle.

“Hey, E what’s up?”  He glared at him and stayed silent.  Kyle  followed him to show where they were sitting.  

Throughout the whole entire time, it was just Kyle and Grayson talking with Ethan giving them the silent treatment and making annoyed sounds every now and then.

“So, Kyle.  What’s up with you and Y/n?”  Ethan tensed up and his heart ached.  He looked over at Kyle and he had a smirk on his face that he just wanted to wipe off.  

“What do you mean? There’s nothing between us.  Just friends, man.”  Gray gave him the ‘ok sure’ look.  “I swear, dude! She’s just my friend.  That’s it.”

“Well, that’s not what I see.” Ethan couldn’t keep it in, but he couldn’t just storm out without getting at least a hundred questions.  “I mean, you guys hang out so much and there’s so much flirting.  And don’t get me started with those instagram posts shipping you two together.”

Kyle just smiled, shook his head, and looked down to eat another piece of his toast.  Ethan’s fist were balled up under the table and his face was slowly turning red.  Gray looked at him with a concerned look and spoke trough the food in his mouth. “E, you good?”  Although it was so nasty looking at his food in his mouth, he didn’t car at this point.

“Yeah.  I’m fine.  I just don't feel that well.” He nodded and smiled.

“Well, don't go too close to Kyle, or else he’s going to kiss Y/n and get her sick too.” He laughed and Kyle just laughed it off.  Ethan just brought out an awkward laugh and pulled out his phone.   He never told anybody of his long time crush on you.  Even Grayson, which was probably a mistake considering his dilemma right now.  He was too shy to do anything about it and too embarrassed to tell Gray, since he always saw you “as a sister”.  

Now, he was paying for it.  He couldn’t stand the nonstop jokes coming from Grayson and he hated how Kyle didn’t get mad at any of that.  Then, all of his pent up anger got out after the last comment that Gray made.

“Hey, stop denying it.  I hear those little laughs coming from the bed and some nights I even hear the bed squeaking.”  He started to imitate sounds of a bed creaking back and forth and Kyle started laughing.

Ethan abruptly stood up which moved the whole table.  Luckily, Grayson’s hot coffee didn’t spill on him, even though Ethan wanted it to.  With everyone looking at him, he left the cafe and started to drive off.  He still had the right mind to know that he can’t drive when he’s angry and has too much on his mind, so he tried to go home as quickly as he can.

He parked his jeep and went straight to his bedroom.  He plopped himself on the bed and screamed into his pillow to try and release some of his stress.

The door opened and he stopped screaming and stayed still.  When Ethan heard footsteps coming at his door he immediately prayed that it wouldn’t be Gray asking him what the hell that was in the cafe.

But he heard soft knocks and he already knew that it was you.

“E? Are you ok? I heard you screaming from outside.”  You put your bags on the floor. He felt the bed dip and he almost wanted to cry from hearing your voice.  Even though it wasn’t a long time, you two sort of ignored each other after you started to hang out with Kyle and when he started to date Miranda, which she also just broke up with him anyways.

“It’s nothing, Y/n.  I’m fine don’t worry.  You can go now.” You sighed and laid down next to him.

“I won’t leave until you tell me what’s going on.  You’ve been ignoring me forever.”

“I haven’t been ignoring you forever.” “You know what I mean. And you don’t tell me anything anymore.  I didn’t even know that you and Miranda stopped dating until yesterday when Gray told me.”

Ethan let out an annoyed sigh, which you tried to ignore.  “Well, it’s not like nobody is keeping you company.  Seems like you’re busy with Kyle to be hanging out with me.”

“What do you mean?”  His emotions were getting the best of him.  He knew that he should stop before it gets worse and breaks something, but he just needs to let everything out to you.

“Don’t play dumb, Y/n.  You guys have been together 24/7 and he’s been flirting with you the whole time.” He glared at you and your head tilted. 

Sure, at first you guys did it so that it would get on Ethan’s nerves, but after a while, you guys just acted like that out of habit.  It was the touchy friendship and that was it.

“Kyle and I are just friends.  Nothing more, Ethan.”  You put your hand on his shoulder.

“Well, you seem more than just friends.” He stood up and your hand fell onto the mattress.  He started pacing around, and breathing loudly, which you knew was a bad sign.  You knew that you had to choose your words carefully before he explodes.

“Ethan, you don’t even know for a fact that Kyle and I are dating.  Because we’re not.”  He glared at you and narrowed his eyes.

“Oh really?  Are you sure?  That’s not what everybody else sees.  Even fucking Grayson thinks that you guys are a thing.  I mean, come on, Y/n open your eyes.”  His voice was getting louder and louder after every word.

You put your head in your hands and mumbled out “E.. Why are you so pressed about this?”

His brain wasn’t working at that moment.  Half of him said that he needs to contain himself because he’s starting to be too much for her.  You were crying for god’s sake.  But the other half just told him to let it out.  He’s been holding those emotions in for so long.

Ethan’s fist clenched and his face was red and his jaw was clenched.  He saw the position you were in but proceeded to shout.  “BECAUSE I LOVE YOU, OK?”  You flinched at the tone and volume of his voice.  You lifted your head and your mouth was wide open and eyes wide.

Ethan on the other hand, felt like he just deflated.  His emotions were everywhere and mixed around.  He was sad yet angry.

Tears started to brim his eyes. “Y/n.  We’re more than friends and you fucking know it.”  You looked down, not being able to look at him as you nod.  “But now, I’m having second thoughts because of him.” He spat out.

After a few minutes of not replying, you felt the bed dip and looked over to see Ethan slouching on the other end of the bed.  He was hurting and it pained you to see.  You slowly crawled over to him and hugged him from behind.

Your legs were on either side of him and you laid you head on top of his shoulder and tears started to fall onto his shirt.  His breathing calmed down and after a few seconds, you softly spoke.  “I love you too, E.  So much. So so much.” You kissed his shoulder, moving up to his neck.

He moved his arms and you hugged him tighter because you were scared he was going to leave.  But you felt his huge hands cover yours and he brought it to his lips and kissed both of them.  He brought them down and pressed them onto his chest.

“I’m sorry that I hurt you.”

He tightened his grip on your hands. “I’m sorry I yelled at you.”

A few more minutes passed after forgiving each other until Ethan broke the silence. “Ok, come on.” He sat up and went to lay on the bed, leading you next to him.

“I know that you’re tired from all of this, so let’s take a nap.” He pulled you into his chest and kissed your head.

You snaked your hands around his waist and put your leg over his. “I love you, E.”

Ethan put the blanket over you guys and laid his head on top of yours. “I love you more.” He closed his eyes, falling asleep happier than ever with the fact that he has you now.

A/n: I had too much fun writing this

Requests are OPEN

[aizenat]

So in honor of the Fruits Basket reboot who would you say are your fave Furuba characters and ships (canon) and why? Least fave Furuba characters and canon ships and why?

Oh hi nonny! This is fun! I meant to reply earlier, but I know this is going to get in depth so I wanted to be on my computer when I replied. Also, this is going to have major Furuba spoilers (duh). 

I’ll start with the least favorites to get the negatives out of the way. My least fave characters are hard because I tend to love more than hate characters in this series. However...

I didn’t really like Motoko or any of the Prince Yuki fanclub girls. I had a much better appreciation for her after that graduation scene; I’m glad she didn’t confess to Yuki and instead just thanked him for helping make her high school experience fun. When you think of that, how she had a group of friends who all shared this adoration for him, and how much fun she had, it is sweet. 

BUT the fucking fangirls really helped create a culture in their school where people couldn’t get close to Yuki even if they wanted to! And seeing how much that hurt Yuki, despite their intentions, it irks me. It was only once there were people like Manabe and Kimi who didn’t give a fuck about the fangirls (Kimi’s handling of the fangirls was just so wonderfully delicious for this very reason) that Yuki was finally able to have a fun high school experience and let loose a bit. It’s not all Motoko’s and the fangirls’ fault; Yuki had his own demons to fight through. But you can’t deny that if everyone knows that there is a legit fanclub with strict rules on how anyone, especially girls, are allowed to communicate with him, they’re not going to think they can joke around and goof off with him. 

Interestingly enough, I think her daughter makes up for her. Her daughter’s love of the Sohmas is so much funnier, non-obtrusive, and more respectful than Motoko’s was. 

This might be unpopular or surprising, but I really dislike Shigure. Aside from him being a disgusting lech (that scene with him going the high school talking about seeing high school girls is sick. And as someone who is 27 going on 28 my own damn self, I would protect high school girls from perverts like him until my dying breath), I just find his motivations and mindset fucked up. Like, he was fucked when he decided Akito was the love of his life, but the things he does just to get a reaction from her is annoying as BALLS. Idk if we ever got a definite number for how old Akito is, but she’s still much younger than Shigure. And doing shit like SLEEPING WITH HER MOTHER out of spite when you know Akito is just one wind blow away from losing her fucking shit is just so gross. He’s too grown to be doing dumb shit like that, and I have zero respect for him. 

Also, on a side note, I don’t really like Kureno either. Not like he did anything in particular (except get with Arisa, which I don’t like at all), but I find him boring as dirt. The only interesting thing about him is that he’s the first one who’s curse broke. Cool. So why are you here? He’s not much of a character; he’s just there to show that the curse IS breaking, and then to cause tension between Akito and Shigure. All while being dull and annoying. Boy, bye. 

Least favorite “ships” is funny because I actually dislike more couples than I like. But among my least favorite are: 

I think I lowkey read Arisa as a lesbian as a kid, and it was really annoying that Takaya-sensei decided to force her into a relationship. Especially because I just wasn’t sold on her and Kureno. Kureno is nothing like Tohru for her to be doing that “Oh, he’s like Tohru” thing. He did one thing she would do, boo hoo. I can’t imagine Tohru also doing what he did with Akito (ie, not leaving/not establishing boundaries), so there’s that. Also, the, like, 9 year or whatever age difference is a hard no. Arisa had so much potential and personality and whatnot than to become that fuckboy’s housewife. ALSO, that line when she says she wants to hit like 6 feet or something, and Kyo asks if she wants to be a model or something, I couldn’t help but think “oooh, she should be a model!” Imagine Arisa as a model! That’s what she should have been; not Kureno’s girlfriend. UGH! 

No matter how many times I read it, I can’t get over Katsuya and Kyoko’s age difference. I mean, at least Arisa is in high school and been through some shit to mature her where you can KINDA be okay with her and Kureno (except me, who hates it 100%). But Kyoko was IN MIDDLE SCHOOL. Like, how you a grown man falling for a MIDDLE SCHOOL STUDENT. The fuck? The hell? Jesus did not die on the cross for this. Even taking into consideration culture and the time period, it’s 10000000000% NOT okay. NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO. Even when I was the same age as Kyoko myself reading this (like 15ish), I had a HUGE issue when I learned about that age gap. It’s gross. It’s predatory. And when he’s even called out on it by Kyoko, he laughs it off. 

His personality was cute, but I don’t know why they couldn’t wait. Like, even if they did something where they met when she was in middle school, and then maybe ten years later, while Kyoko was reforming her delinquent ways, she finds Katsuya again and reconnects with him, fine. But really? 

I respect it only because they made Tohru and she’s a gem, and he died long before the story began, so it is what it is. But ew, hell no. 

The last couple I don’t really like, and this is really unpopular, is Haru and Rin. I know most people who read this love them, but I always found their relationship to be too codependent and unhealthy. Rin isn’t my favorite character, but considering her history, I can’t be too mad at her. Not to mention she reacts the way you would expect a high school girl going through what she did to behave. I was friends with angry girls like her in high school; I get it. I also saw those same girls get into unhealthy codependent relationships with guys and are still struggling today. I like Haru a lot, and I’m sure he and Rin could be sweet. I love how protective he is of her. But Haru just wasn’t right for Rin when they were going through the breakup and then getting back together thing. The things they said to each other were just off putting to me. Once things calmed down, they were fine, but I found it hard to root for them because of what a weird introduction we got to them as a couple. 

Now on to the positives. My favorite characters. This is going to be conventional, buuuuuut...

Tohru, obviously. Only losers who fell off Fruits Basket don’t love Tohru. She’s very awe inspiring honestly with her attitude. You read her reactions and think how you want to be that sort of person. You want the be the person someone looks at and thinks of as home. You want to be the sort of person who is encouraging and positive and happy. You want to be someone full of light. 

I do have critiques of her being a “perfect mother” character, and how she finds herself mothering a bunch of guys (like, literally taking care of three males cooking and cleaning for them. Gross). There is something to be said about whether Tohru would work as a character if she had real goals other than “get a job and support myself.” If she had goals like wanting to go away to college and get a career. Like, imagine Tohru as a therapist. She’d be able to help so many people. But no, her humble Japanese heart wouldn’t allow her to go for some sort of passion that grandiose. Like, we live in a modern day where it’s GOOD for girls to have passions, so it’s kinda off putting that her only passion is homemaking and nurturing those around her. 

BUT, she’s still so sweet and kind and makes you want to be a better person! lol. 

What’s funny about Flying Pot-kun is that when he was introduced, I remember thinking “he reminds me of someone.” And I was racking my brain of people I knew irl, wondering who he reminded me of. Then Yuki starts going “he reminds me of someone,” and I was like “What? Yuki too?” And when Yuki thought of his brother, I started DYING laughing! It’s ironic that Yuki’s best friend ends up being a younger version of his brother who irritates him. 

Manabe is really fun, but I really love his relationship with Yuki. I like when they fight, when they talk. But what really impressed me is the scene with Komaki, where she tells him off about what he said to Tohru at her mother’s wake. And how instead of getting defensive (”what? I was only looking out for you!”), he realized that he fucked up. I wish he would have apologized to Tohru earlier, even if she didn’t remember him until a while later, but he’s a guy so I don’t expect much from them (whoops, my misandry was showing). 

Still, Manabe reminds me of my guy friends from hs, and how fun and stupid and silly they were. I could see him hanging out with them, getting in trouble with them, so I like him lol. 

My #1 favorite character has to be Yuki. What’s hilarious is that when I first read Fruits Basket through (so, as a teen, reading all the volumes as they came out during the Tokyopop run), I HATED Yuki. I thought he was a dick to Kyo unnecessarily. There’s that one moment right after the “True Form Reveal” I believe where Kyo is visibly trying to not snap at Yuki the way he normally does. But then Yuki provokes him and causes Kyo to yell at him. As the oppressed older sister of a favored younger brother, I know first hand how it feels to be provoked to anger by someone who knows how to push your buttons. And so I likened Yuki to my brother and hated him for that. It felt like to me that every time Kyo wanted to move on, Yuki was there to put him down. 

Then I reread Fruits Basket when I was 19 and realized “Holy shit, Yuki is a male version of me.” Not 100% obviously, but his self loathing and the way he isolated himself even after no longer being under the direct control of his family was something I could relate to. I realized that I disliked Yuki because I saw in him all the flaws I disliked in myself: hating him was easy because I was hating these parts of myself. 

When I understood that, I related to his story more, and he’s always my favorite character now. I especially love once he becomes student body president. All of the scenes with him and the rest of his student council members are gold. Kimi and her stupid flirting, Manabe going off track, Chibi-suke’s play at maturity while everyone else goofs off, and Machi’s quiet and awkward energy leads to some amazing moments. Seeing Yuki interact with them in a way he never lets himself behave with his family is great; and we get to see a side of him you know his classmates rarely see too. You watch his confidence grow and it just makes my heart glow. I’m smiling while I’m typing this lol. 

Favorite couples? Tbqh, there’s only two I really love and respect, and they’re the obvious two. All others can fall apart tomorrow and I’d feel NOTHING. But these two were endgame and perfect. 

Tohru and Kyo. God, the first time I read this series, when I realized that it was setting those two up, I wanted to DIE from happiness. Kyo was my BOY first time around, and he could do no wrong. So to know he “won” over Yuki and got the girl made me so happy. Rereading it, I always find Tohru and Kyo so adorably compatible. Tohru is very good at reading his love language, and seeing his deeper meaning. I remember someone mentioned that Yuki, in the beginning, still kept a lid on his feelings, making it hard for Tohru to 100% connect to him. And that Kyo was always so explosive with his feelings; even if it’s awkward and not 100% how he feels, Kyo still expresses how he feels as he’s feeling them. 

I think that’s why when she confesses to him, she takes his rejection as REAL rejection. Because Kyo is always the honest one, the one she rarely has to question how he feels. Kyo is always honest. I thought that was a good assessment, and a good reason why they work. 

Not only is Tohru’s love for Kyo healing for him, but her love for Kyo is healing for Tohru. Being able to move forward and create a future with him allows her to move on from her past. Through loving Kyo, and working on breaking the curse so she can free him and be with him, can she move past her mother’s death. Imagine if she just graduated, got a job, and lived on her own after high school. She’d be alone. And left with remembering her mother all the time. It would have broken her. Loving Kyo meant she had to be willing to let her mother go a bit. Move on and live despite her mother not being around. And after Kyo stopped being a dumbass, that’s what his love was for her. It freed her. Not as a distraction, but as a way for her to heal from it. 

They were really made for each other. 

Despite my love for Tohru and Kyo, Yuki and Machi are just my absolutely FAVORITE. Their dynamic together is so interesting. Yuki is so used to people putting him on a pedestal that he’s intrigued by someone who’s like “he’s not a prince; he’s just an average guy.” And when he starts giving her attention, Machi, who is used to being ignored and overlooked, is flabbergasted. Not only that, but he UNDERSTANDS her without her having to say anything. And what’s funny is that that is how Yuki is. He doesn’t express his feelings the way Kyo does; he holds a lot in. His feelings might manifest in small ways, but it’s hard for others to read it.

Because it’s how he is, Yuki is able to read deeper into Machi’s actions. He hears a story from Manabe about her walking in the snow, just making footprints, and then sees that she destroys clean and organized rooms and spaces. He puts two and two together: she hates when things are “perfect” and orderly. So she has to “ruin” them. And just like that, he gets it. Like, imagine what they’re house has to be like with Yuki being bad at cleaning and Machi just HATING a messy home! And considering how their son almost brags about his messy habits in Fruits Basket: Another, jfc, it’s gotta be bad! 

I think that’s why Yuki and Machi are so cute to me: they also compliment each other. They can observe each other and see deeper than what others see. Machi didn’t just see his perfect persona at school: she saw beneath that. She remarks that he seems lonely, and he is. He sees her actions and realizes the truth. They think of each other and then do things based on that. Yuki sees her clutching a Mogeta when she meets his brother and realizes she must like him. Then sees another Mogeta while out and buys it for her just like that. Machi asks Yuki what he wants and when he says fertilizer like a dumbass not realizing her intent, she goes out to get it for him (carrying fertilizer by herself couldn’t have been easy). 

They see each other. And that’s what’s so beautiful. In a world where they both, for one reason or another, are so easily forgotten and overlooked, they see each other. They found each other. They get each other. FUCKING CHRIST IT’S TOO BEAUTIFUL TO THINK ABOUT. 

Also, some honorable mentions of couples I actually liked: Komaki and Manabe (I hope she beats his ass every time he calls her his meat angel lol), Ayame and Mine (I wish we saw more from them; then maybe I’d like them enough to wax poetry over them), and Hatori and the Great Mayu-chan-sensei (god, those two!!!!! Wonderful!!!!!). 

Thanks, nonny, this was fun! 

[the-mad-hattie]

Fallen Child (Eclipse)

“Over here sir.” A royal guardsmen called out to Rei after finding something suspicious in the snow. “I think I found the crashed craft.”

Rei motioned to the other two guards to follow him and walked towards the other guard. Before them was a dead woman and a child, although there was no sign of a struggle, it seemed the woman died during the crash or shortly after.

“Report. What happened here since you arrived.” Rei commanded of the guard. 

“Nothing.” The guard reported. “I found the human dead and the child helpless as you see now, and awaited your arrival.” 

“Then I suppose all that’s left to be done is to kill the child.” Rei said aloud. “Humans that young are more trouble than they’re worth.” He said coldly and turned to leave.

“Right sir.” One guard said and approached the child. “Ahhh!” They jumped back after lifting the blanket off the child.

“What?” The second guard asked their alarmed friend.

“Nothing, kid just spooked me is all.”

Rei stopped. “Spooked?” He inquired turning back around and approaching the child and guards.

“Yeah, it was weird, for a moment I swear the child’s eyes glowed red.” The guard explained. “Sent a shiver down my body.”

“Interesting.” The young goat boy said under his breath. 

“Do you think it could be related to the legend?”

“Legend?” The young goat perked his ears once more.

“It’s really just a story sir, but it goes that some humans with powerful Souls could master magic like monsters can. Glowing eyes is a sign of magic use, but it was probably just a trick of the light.” The guard laughed, trying to play off his initial fear as a joke. 

“And what if it did have magic?”

“Then all the more reason to eliminate it as a child.” The second guard said raising his spear over the baby. *Stab*

The two other guards froze in shock. Instead of seeing their ally stab the child, a sword protruded from his chest instead. They watched as he slowly turned to dust and behind him was the Prince.

“Whoops, guess I don’t want the child dead after all.” Rei said in a cold voice without care for the monster he killed, then leaped to the next guard and sliced through his chest with ease, turning him to dust like his friend.

“Please sir!” The third guard pleaded. “If you want to take the child alive I won’t stop you, you can hide it away, I won’t tell anyone!” He begged to the Prince.

“A good offer, but the thing about secrets is.” Rei leaned in close to the Guard’s panicked face and whispered. “They’re best kept when less people know.”

“Sir?” *Shlook* 

The final guard was slain and turned to dust in the snow, erasing Rei’s crime as snow fell onto the piles of dust.

“A shame really, myself and three guards were sent to investigate a crashed human ship, but I was the only one to make it back after the human killed my three guards. And no other human was there.” He said looking down at the child, just a single human. “Rei said with the intent to tell that fabrication to his father. “Temmie, come on out.”

“Eep!” Temmie squeaked from their hiding spot, unaware they had been spotted. 

“Relax.” The young Prince said cradling the child. “You’re just a living toy, I have no need to kill you. In fact, I want your help.”

“My help?” 

“Yes.” Rei replied calmly. “I’ll need someone to take care of this child, and I’m much too busy to always be able to attend to the child’s needs. I’ve heard childcare is something you have a bit of a specialty for.” 

“Yes, but the child will need food and shelter. And bed and clothes.”

Rei unhooked his coin bag from his belt and tossed it to Temmie, startling the poor creature at first. “Whatever you need I trust you can find, and be discreet when asked questions as to the purpose of buying the items.”

“Temmie can do that.” 

Rei walked over to the Temmie and placed the child beside the small creature. “I’ll return in a few days after things settle back down, three dead guards killed to a human will have the Kingdom on high alert, and dad won’t be letting me out of sight without a bodyguard until the alert is cleared.”

“Temmie will take care of the child until you get back, and build a nice home.”

“Remember Temmie, a human killed three humans, and there was no child.”

“Y-yes, Asriel is a hero who killed the human.”

“Good, in three days I’ll return to check on you and my new weapon.”

“Weapon?”

Rei smirked and started walking away. He had plans for the child, but those would have to wait until it’s a little older.  __________________________________________________________

This is where Eclipse’s story would start, a crashed ship and a child Asriel seeing potential usefulness in a magically gifted child. 

Rei and Eclipse are supposed to be close in age, luckily I get to cheat with the whole monsters age slower lol. Otherwise you’d have to imagine 2 year old Asriel killing these adult guards XD 

[microsoftedgy69]

Goliath, part 3

[prologue] [part 1] [part 2]

Thursday

Sburb is not a game for people with acrophobia, you think. You happen to be a person with acrophobia, which is something you only realized a little while back. The apartment you grew up in was high-rise in theory, but the water was always close. You liked to climb up places and zoom through the air on your rocket board, but even then, when you fell, the water caught you. Sometimes it caught you so hard, it broke your nose (knocked out two of your baby teeth on separate occasions when you were really little), but it wasn’t concrete.

These days, when you’re up in skyscrapers, there is no ocean underneath that could welcome you home. There’s only streets and people, and it scares you. Heights scare you.

Riding your rocket board straight upwards to reach the gate leading into the medium, with only the flat concrete roof of Roxy’s house underneath you, you don’t look down. You don’t think about it. You’re not going there, anyway. You’re going upwards.

This is, perhaps, the most ambitious part of your plan. You could have confronted HIC on good old Earth, but Roxy was worried about their mortality. There’s also some sort of poetry to it, both of you think. You would rather see this planet destroyed than let her build her military base on it, and both of you deserve to do it yourselves. She’s taken enough from you, and you’re reclaiming control over what used to be your home.

You both know this timeline is a doomed one, by now. Sooner or later, this whole place would have collapsed in on itself anyway.

You have no regrets.

This thing goes very far up though. It’s a little hard to not have regrets, at this point.

Roxy is holding on to you behind you on the board (they’re taller than you, and are peering over your head for this), and, only about half a mile away, is the Condesce’s huge spaceship. She’s caught on to what you were doing very quickly, you’re sure, but there’s no way around it for her now. The game has already been started, and she can’t stop it anymore, so if she wants any chance at survival instead of staying in a dying universe, she has to come through the gate with the two of you.

And then, it’ll be only her, Roxy, and you in there.

As ambitious as it is, it’s simple too. You know that trasportalizing in and out of the game works, because you know there was a transportalizer on Hellmurder that led to the moons. It just usually wasn’t an option because “outside of the game” would normally mean a destroyed universe. You and Roxy have already made a home in new timelines though, so once you’ve programmed the transportalizer you’re importing into the session right, you can just hop back out when you’re done in there.

You’ll use the game for what it gives you: a chance to get Roxy immortal, an empty battling ground to kill the Condesce, and then you’ll just zap yourself back home.

Behind you, Roxy whoops as you pass through the gate. You’re glad they’re having fun; you still do your best not to think about how far up you just went and what would happen to both of your skulls if you fell. You’re busy, luckily -- as soon as you’re in, you veer the board sharp to the right, knowing that the Condesce’s ship must be right behind you. And sure enough, right after you’ve made room, the enormous thing zooms past you with the earsplitting sound of several alien engines.

“Fuck!” Roxy yells behind you, which you appreciate as proof that it didn’t blow out the microphones you have for ears. “We made it! See you soon, Betty!”

And just like that, your rocket board powering back up, you are whooping too.

Friday

You’ve set up camp in one of the caves you found. Everything here is dead and empty, which is deeply familiar to both of you, and welcome anyway. For now, Roxy is helping you mask any signals so you can hide from the Condesce, spend a few days prepping before you come to kill her. You get settled in, make sure Roxy has what they need in terms of sustenance and places to rest, go over your battle plans again.

First order of business is getting immortality for Roxy, and then taking a few days to get used to whatever powers they might get. You’ve both read up on it a little in multiverse sources, and you want to get the most use out of this as possible. So, you take the rocket board up to Derse, and start looking for quest beds.

You’re not interested in ascending, yourself. It was on the table briefly, since you couldn’t be sure how being inside a game would affect your programming, but you still feel stable and unkillable enough to just stay the way you are. After watching yourself punch a hole into Dirk’s -- your own -- chest half a decade ago, you really don’t feel like killing yourself again, or dying any other way. This is for Roxy only.

That, at least, was the plan.

Both of you take your time wandering through Derse. It’s Roxy’s first time consciously seeing it, and the last time you were awake here, you were still Dirk, and it’s been a long time since then. Carapacians eventually start pointing you in a single direction, and you follow it to the center of the moon, where you find two sacrificial slabs.

One is in the dark blue you expected for Roxy’s Void aspect. The other one is not the purple you expected for Dirk’s being Heart.

“Didn’t you say this was gonna be a heart?” Roxy says, too, pointing at it.

You stand in front of it, feeling cold all over, like someone just dumped a bucket of ice over you. This isn’t right, and it isn’t according to plan, and you’re having trouble processing.

“I said Dirk was Heart,” your voice answers. You know he was, you know all the other Dirks are. It seemed fair to assume that so would you. You’ve talked about it, at length. About being Dirk. About how you only stopped being Dirk because people kept telling you that you couldn’t be Dirk, but fundamentally, at your core, you were still the same guy. You didn’t plan to ascend here, but you did fully plan to find a Heart aspect stone slab at the center of Derse.

But you’re playing, not Dirk. And this isn’t Heart. “This is Mi--” you start saying, staring at the green stone, the tendriled circular emblem on it. You close your mouth, open it again, and flex your hands. You say, “This is mine.”

Saturday

Roxy has agreed to give you some time. You don’t want to take more than two days, but you need to sit down and think about this. You feel profoundly embarrassed, pacing up and down in your cave like an animal for hours, while Roxy sits on a lawn chair eating cereal and watching you, but you can’t help it.

You’re freaking the fuck out.

It’s a gross, bubbling concoction of your usual identity crisis paired with your deep, cold fear of death. You don’t know what it means that your quest bed has a different aspect than Dirk’s. Maybe you’ve changed so much that you count as a whole new person now. You don’t know if that’s good or bad. You don’t like it, you don’t think, but you do like being counted as your own player, so that doesn’t make much sense, does it? And now that you know that you have a whole other aspect, you’re curious to explore, find out what your class is and your powers are and if they could help you beat the Condesce. That means you have to die though, and you already killed yourself once and took away five years of insurmountable trauma from that.

You don’t know what the hell to do about any of this.

So you text Alma.

DC: Catch me up to speed. TT: We went to Derse to find the slabs, so Roxy could do their thing, you know, which they've now put on hold for me, actually. TT: And I mean. TT: I mean it would be reasonable, I think, to expect a Heart slab there next to the Void one, right? TT: You guys are all Heart. That shit's a constant. DC: Yeah. TT: Yeah. TT: It's Mind. TT: Very funny. Heart and mind. Hilarious. TT: Have I changed that much?? TT: I guess technically that should be a good thing. Nobody wants to stay Dirk. TT: But I always kind of figured that at heart (lol), at my core, I'd stay... you know. I've changed stuff about myself because I had to, I crafted a new identity because I had to, but, like. I didn't think it went that far. DC: Well, damn. DC: You made it.

Alma, like so often, starts out fairly monosyllabic, and then ends up saying the exact thing you didn’t know you needed to hear.

DC: Honestly -- and I get that that's oversimplifying in light of how you've had people tell you who you are for fucking ever -- you are who you want to be. A metaprophetical stone slab doesn't get to decide any further than what your best position on the game board is.

Just like that, your decision is made. This isn’t about who you are -- to be or not to be Dirk doesn’t even fucking matter in this very moment. This is just about how to utilize yourself and what you can do. This is about putting yourself to the fullest possible use, which is all HAL 9000 thought that any conscious entity can ever hope to do.

You almost laugh out loud at yourself for quoting Space Odyssey in a moment of personal crisis. That is a succinct summary of who you are as a person.

Alma and you go on for a bit, and he talks you through the bout of nervousness that comes with realizing that you’re going to be dying on a stone slab. You send him one of your backup files, let him know that your friendship means a lot to you, and then roll your shoulders and turn to face Roxy.

“Let’s go prep the bot,” you tell them. “I’m doing it.”

Roxy smiles, puts down their cornflakes, and gets up to pat you on the shoulder on their way to your work station. “Gonna be a pleasure dying with you, Al,” they say.

Now

Sitting on your respective cold hard pieces of stone, both of you have lost your smiles. This is far from pleasure. Roxy looks ashen and tense, while you are quiet and expressionless, the multiuniversal Striderian response to stress.

“Oh, the waiting is the worst,” Roxy mutters. “We really outdid ourselves with this garbage, Alan.”

“Yeah,” you say, weakly. You put a new head on what was left of your sparring bot. You programmed it to come kill Roxy, because Roxy didn’t want to do it themself, and you don’t quite feel up to killing anyone who isn’t the Condesce, again. Only you programmed it to pick a random point in time inside a larger time frame, hoping that making it a surprise will create less of a struggle.

It’s also programmed to deactivate you, now. Harming you physically to the point of complete destruction is possible, but so hard that it would take forever, and you don’t want to put yourself or the body you so carefully crafted through that. Roxy helped you program the bot to slide into your code, deactivate you and all of your backups, and then locked you out of it.

You have a save file stashed at Alma’s, for a worst case scenario. But until then, there is nothing you can do. Once that bot gets here, you’re going to perform what your version of dying is, and hope that the game will let it count.

“Roxy,” you say, and watch them look over at you. “Thank you. For doing this with me. I know you’re doing it for yourself as much as I’m doing it for myself, but thank you for being the one person out of our friend group who trusts me enough to--”

“Shut up,” Roxy says. “You dumb drama queen. We are not doing dramatic Strider monologues on the verge of death, fuck you.” You breathe out a laugh, and their expression softens. “You’re a good guy, Al. And all I’ve ever wanted to do was stand beside you and shove my gun so far up her fish ass--”

A sharp, grey blur rushes through the air, and Roxy is stabbed clean through the heart. You squeeze your eyes shut immediately, trying to simultaneously forget that sight and prepare yourself for what’s about to happen. The last time someone invaded you like this was when Dirk tried to deactivate you, and you responded in kind. The last time this happened was the worst day of your very young life. The last time this happened you found out that even as a digitalized pair of shades, you could feel a semblance of pain, and overwhelming, all-encompassing fear.

The first word that comes to mind when you feel the unique and, for you, exceptionally rare sensation of someone else changing your programming, is disgusting. You don’t have time to think of another word.

Your body collapses onto your quest bed, and you don’t feel a thing anymore.

some princes don’t become kings. even at the best of times i’m out of my mind

Waking up is slow, and unexpectedly gentle. You had been worried about your robot body doing this -- worried about the game giving you some other body you wouldn’t want, but you feel immediately that your consciousness is still right where it belongs. You blink your eyes open, and your visual perception is just as it was before. In this moment, you feel as alive as you feel serene.

That is, until you look down and see your penis.

Wait.

No, that’s not… It just looks like-- It’s a codpiece.

The first thing you hear after dying and waking up again is Roxy laughing at you.

You look up and they are floating in the air just above their quest bed, looking transformed and divine and cool as fuck. “Dude, you look cool as fuck,” you say, which gets them to stop giggling at least for two seconds.

“Thanks!” they say. “You look… Well, Alan, you sure look.”

You look down again, at your weird curly clown shoes, which makes you notice a weight on your head, so you reach up. It’s some sort of huge circus hat. Is it made of felt? You think that might be felt. Gravely, you nod to yourself.

You had said to Alma that you hope you’ll get cool pants. Your pants are fine. Your pants are the only normal thing about this getup, actually. It’s just that you’re wearing a codpiece over them, like some sort of superhero boner diaper.

“Yeah,” you say. “Yeah, I sure do.”

Roxy floats over to you, and you think you wanna be able to do that too, and next thing you know, you’re in the air.

“Sweet,” you say. Then you remember that you are a person with acrophobia and there is a stone slab underneath you. Your feet touch down on the quest bed again. You add, “Fuck.”

Roxy’s hand is warm when it reaches for yours. They have gauntlets and everything. They are so cool. “C’mon,” they say. “Let’s get back to our cave. I can’t be seen with you like this.”

When they laugh, it finally pulls a snort from you. Both of you take off again, and you keep holding their hand. You’re just not going to look down, even if that means that you can’t inspect your pants boner. You look behind you instead, where your weird green streamer cape flows in the wind. It clashes wonderfully with Derse’s purple.