#a map of absence

[soracities]

Samih al-Qassim, "The End of a Discussion with a Prison Guard" (trans. A.Z. Foreman, ID included), from A Map of Absence

[kaiasky]

I really truly hate to ask but in your bio when it says map enjoyer the map part is not an acronym. is it??? or u mean the paper maps

ah. a normal map!

source. i think this is very pretty. this is a normal map. The idea is like. Suppose we want to have a 3d model of an old desk like this:

If we just throw that picture on a texture and hit render, we get something like this:

Which doesn't look particularly realistic! Notice how the light is staying in one place and all the highlights on the places where the pencil has dug into the wood don't move to catch the light. Our eyes automatically pick up a lot of detail about the texture of surfaces, and this doesn't look real.

in particular, the angle of the surface determines how much light is reflected at the camera. So we need a way to store the angle of every point on our surface! But it turns out we can use a neat coincidence; we see 3 primary colors and live in 3-dimensional space! To store the orientation of a surface, you can use the normal vector--the arrow perpendicular to the surface. (I like to imagine the object being covered in little tiny spikes sticking straight out at a right angle. We need a way to store those spikes.) Since we have 3 colors and 3 dimensions, we can encode the angle of the normal vector spikes as a color, where the red channel means the left-right angle, the green channel means the up-down angle, and the blue channel means the vertical angle sticking out at the viewer. So to go back to the old image:

The cyan bits to the left (some green, some blue, no red) are spikes pointing to the left. The red/pink bits to the right are spikes pointing to the right. The neutral blue-grey color in the middle is a spike sticking straight up.

There's lots of ways to make a normal map. You can paint them yourself, you can model a really complicated geometry and then calculate a normal map to apply to a much simpler geometry, or you can create it as the "derivative" of a heightmap (a greyscale image where white is high bumps and black is dips). There's even cool neural network things that try to infer the height/normal map from a picture or video!

Here's that normal map I stole applied to a totally flat grey square, with the light moving. Look how convincing the illusion of depth is!

Here's two grey cubes smashing into one another except one has a normal map applied.

So I think this is a really cool technique! But I also think that normal maps, the images themselves, are stunningly beautiful. That's why the background of my avatar is a normal map!

Shoutout to gif.ski for making those gifs. I'm not really sure why its quality is 10x what i get from imagemagick or ffmpeg but it sure as hell is.

[calamitys-child]

Paid £60 for a months bus pass last week only for roadworks to abruptly completely cut off the bus route to the half of town I live in for two months so effectively I paid over a days wages not to take the bus and I have never been angrier

[kiwibirdlafayette]

on your Aitheaca au, when I was writing I was trying to imply that what was stolen was Capsize, but in my want to be vague I know I didn’t do a good job. Like my train of thought was that Ianite was, to a lesser extent, sensing Capsize in a similar vein to how she was sensing ‘Dianite’ when it was actually Tom, if that makes sense. I interpreted this version of Ianite as a goddess who despises not knowing, seeing it as a weakness in herself, so when she senses something that is “hers” but unrecognizable to her, she lies to Flash.

also! thinking about crew dynamics is interesting, cause depending on how you split them up you are almost always stuck with an instigator and an arbiter. The way you’ve split them up rn, Sonja and Tom are instigators (more Tom leaning than anything) and Spark’s the arbiter. Martha’s the arbiter while the other two are instigators. But this fluctuates depending on who’s in the room. Essentially, there’s always going to be a high chance for issues caused inside the group and out.

OH!!! Listen listen liSTENNNN do not say you didnt do didnt do a good job you did an excellent job, there aint nothin wrong with the choice to be vague with it I just dont catch onto things very well xD I really love that idea a ton, I totes agree that she would be able to pick up on Capsize's Ianitian quintessence (the ownership thing I feel could have ties to Capsize's connection to Ianite in the S1 world leaning on the side of being a messenger rather than the champion kind of cues that Jordan would carry if that makes any sense) and also what ya had mentioned on AO3 too, about Jordan's quintessence having ticks of World Historians in him as well that would obscure things a little makes a ton of sense as well and bangs :D

and yeah!!! Aitheaca Ianite is absolutely someone who is hellbent on being an 'all-knowing' for the sake of ultimate balance, where her logic is that if she can control everything, that's how she can guarantee that chaos or order doesnt have an opportunity to rise up- and is the principle on which her reign was founded on. I can imagine this brings her into conflict with the notion of the Watchers (who inherently possess this ability, while she has to rely on her intuitive judgement and using visual conduits/spies, like taking control of Flash) which is why I could maybe imagine she'd want to keep these kinds of things from Flash. She's very much aware of Merina's presence around her champion, and holds resentment that she can't have Merina as her spy and that under the right theoretical circumstance, could break Flash free of her manipulation at any given moment due to her having a higher form of omnipotence (all this being said, Merina is a lower level watcher and isn't at the level of possessing godly foresight that Ianite seems to think she has) I very much want it to feel like a psychological game that Ianite plays with her subordinates that she would only want Flash to believe and be aware of certain things while lying about things like weakness or potential flaw

And crew dynamics!! yessahh the instigator-arbiter combo was absolutely intentional >:] For the sake of chaos (dianitee moment) but also while it would be so easy to just pair them off in travelling groups as syndisparklez/foxxsize or embersduo/zombiecaptains it makes for more interesting writing for them to be split up with the person they had the rockiest history with + a Ruxomarian who does not want to be stuck there (in some random reality across the multiverse) to begin with. In a way the thought process is the "get along or fucking die" premise especially when they start encountering like Flash but like ya said it really is a lot of infighting xD in the Martha led group the dynamic centers around 3 Ianitees all holding some kind of reasonable resentment towards one another (though they can bond over seein their goddess/mom in such a different light and how thats affecting them; like Martha especially not having seen much of Ia in Ruxomar and while she spent time with S1 Ia, I can imagine how jarring it is to run into a universe where your mom is a corrupt deity) And then the Spark led group is just a mess, because Tom and Sonja are both massive instigators in their own way and while they can get into some absolutely unhinged shenanigans as a duo a rift was absolutely torn between them post-S2/Isles era that they become prone to not be willing to go back on their opinions of something and hear the other out. Spark hasnt spent a lot of time with either of them so its hard to take on anything but a methodology of compromise which neither of them want to really entertain- When the four are together the banter can feel a little friendlier because deep down they do all care for one another, they just have a hard time expressing it

In terms of the other instigator duos with Spark n Martha (speaking of, I have a scene with them two and Sonja, which has been funky to ponder on when they encounter Mianite for the first time) its kinda just chaos. Chaos like when you put two besties together xD

[moe-broey]

Hhnghb

[monachopsissssss]

What if you promised me that youll start where I end and I promised to give you everything that I am and well go on and on and on 👉👈... and we were both sapphic

Well then in the end ill be a bit of warmth for you when theres not a lot of warmth left to go around and we can be in lesbians together

[mothergoosinganon]

is mg coming back or is mg dead

—he could come back dead. he could come back alive. depends on if or when he is freed. she has been in the box for three and a half weeks. she went into the box with one remaining protein bar in her pocket. however. it seems as though nobody he has known even realized he is gone. so he very well could starve to death in the empty pocket dimension of the box.—

[e-laing-arts246-03]

This was the first story and graphic I created for the six-word story assignment where we were tasked with picking six words as well as images and font that conveyed a story. I chose a quote from one of Sylvia Plath's poems since to me it seemed interesting in a way that I could play with not only the conceptual elements of the poem and words but with the overall aesthetic and visual relations, I felt fit with the poem. When searching for images I came across this image of an empty plastic glove holding a bouquet and felt that it related nicely with the words bodily, flesh, and organs that I had in my word map. It encapsulates this absence of the body while still implying the body in the empty glove referencing death in a way relating to the theme of mortality reflected in the poem. I felt that the flowers were also significant in this way as flowers are symbolic of life changes commonly used in weddings, birthdays, and funerals. Flowers are symbols of mourning and represent the immortal nature of the human body as reflected in this poem. I chose to fade the picture to make it look more like an illustration to give it a vintage and old feel as relates to the almost creepy diction used in the poem. The illustrated quality of the flowers then lent itself to a rounder more organic typeface that again connected with the organic nature of bodily forms. When I set out to do this project I originally wanted to include some imagery of bones or skeletal structures, however, I felt that adding too much more to my graphic would compromise the simplicity that I was striving for, do you agree or not?

For my second story and graphic for the same assignment, I went with a short story that I had found online that to me had this interesting ominous feel that I wanted to play with in relation to images and font. In my word map, I started with words like fire and destruction and transitioned to exploring the connotations of the word haystack leading to farmhouses. Because of this, I used an old polaroid picture I found of an old farmhouse that has this very ominous, lost-in-time feel. In the background, I used a photo of fire adding that destructive element of the story in the graphic without actually showing the house burning down or any destruction taking place. I instead only imply destruction leaving the viewer questioning hitting home the ominous and mysterious feeling that this story encapsulates. I faded the image of the fire in the background to match the polaroid on top to blend the images as well as centered the polaroid giving it the main focus and drawing your eye to the sad-looking white house in the picture rather than the bright flames that surround it. When choosing the font for this graphic I wanted something haphazard and human in the story. After all, the person in the story burns down the haystack in order to find something lost. The handwritten font in this way introduces the human within the story who is performing the action. The messy scrawled handwriting font I felt fit nicely as it looks as if someone quickly left a note, something may be left on the fridge with a magnet, reminiscent of a clue of some sort to the mystery this graphic creates. I had a hard time deciding on believable handwritten fonts and was considering making my own. Do you think the font fits well with the images and that it looks natural and human not too computer generated?

[skylertheminish]

To say that I haven't played this in a good while, last year in fact. I'm still absolute dog water at this game! But it's coming back to me (along with the nightmares of Flyfish and smallfries).

Regardless I got a good chuckle out of me getting splatted in the first wave.

[kadoodles-on-ao3]

Hello!! I took a longer break than I thought I would but now I'm back! :)

I hope to finally sit down and take the dang gpose pictures for my FFXIV crossover so I can share it all soon! For those who'd like to cosplay the squad in-game I'll be putting the glam lists (and any alt options for stuff that's lower level, non-mogstation, class neutral, etc) on Eorzea Collection, but if you're more interested in just looking at what I made and/or the crossover aspect like "ooh what ff jobs would they be??? if they actually did a crossover what races from 14 would they make them???", more pics with better outfits as well as my crossover-job writeups will be here on my blog (along with links to my Eorzea Collection posts)!

Also if you do play 14... I may have went ahead and made a couple alts based on the above and may have even made some text macros to type in chat voice line quotes from XC 1 during dungeons to make it like you're actually fighting alongside Shulk or Melia :) (and Egil too but he doesn't talk he grumpy... and has very few voice lines to work with in comparison lol). And you may also send me asks to meet up with either of them and talk to them and/or do dungeons/raids with them if you want! They are very baby, level/msq-wise, rn because I don't have much time to play them (and I'm nervous to rp at all least of all mid-dungeon lmao) but they exist!!! Shulk and Melia and Egil real omg

Completely unrelated to anything I've talked about ever at all whatsoever but my bf and I have been doing a Godzilla movie marathon the past month or so and (aside from them being very very fun to watch and I recommend you watch them if you're interested) I actually have a lot of thoughts about each one and the series as a whole, so I might post my reviews of them on here too! And perhaps make a tier list ranking them since that's what the kids are doing right? They still make those? (Also I think the number system we use for rating everything nowadays isn't super informative in terms of telling an audience if something is worth experiencing or not, lots of bad movies and games are fun because they're 3/10s, so instead of that I have little categories like "how often are the fights silly because you can really tell it's just guys in suits" or "does this film or does it not have a comic relief side character who is obsessed with one (1) singular thing in every scene and is genuinely really hilarious because that is a Thing a lot the Godzilla movies have for some reason and I love it so much" or "how much does this film tie into the original allegory/moral of the atomic bombings on Japan or is it just 'big monsters cool'", so depending on what you're wanting to get out of these movies you can tell which ones you'd want to see. As well as an overall "do I recommend you watch this movie" rating haha)

[tossawary]

One of my personal nitpicks for historical fantasy is a lack of servants, staff, subordinates, and... idk... subjects? Like, their absence is not... a total dealbreaker for me, depending on the situations the characters are in and whether or not I can just assume that other people are there in the background... but so many of the protagonists in historical fantasy stuff are higher-ranking (very often royalty), and/or have busy jobs, and/or have enormous houses that would necessitate having at least part-time staff.

Like, girl, you should have a maid! WHERE is your chaperone?! WHO is driving this carriage?! Where are your footmen? Are you trying to imply that a WEALTHY DUCHESS is taking a CAB?! You know that you probably have tenants, right? Where is your steward?! Where is your lawyer? Your accountant?! (Like, yeah, you're not going to have your lawyer living in your house, but you HAVE one, right???)

Or, man, you're supposed to be a military commander and you don't even have a single secretary?! Where is your SQUIRE?! (In the spirit of historical fiction, I am jumping wildly across time periods with every sentence here.) Man, I know you aren't looking after your own boots. Where are your GUARDS?! Who set up this tent for you?! Who is looking after your horse?! Who is making and carrying the incredibly valuable maps people are recklessly stabbing daggers into?!

SOMEONE has to be scrubbing these floors and delivering the mail and cooking the meals and doing laundry, and they're probably all DIFFERENT people! My dentist has at least three different receptionists and we can't even get ONE for our court wizard here? A sorcerer's apprentice to take notes? Someone like Sherlock Holmes could get away with just having a housekeeper and taking taxis, sure, but your character is supposed to be a KING?! Why is he answering his own front door? He's going to get assassinated. His SERVANTS should have SERVANTS.

Like, yes, I understand that a lot of servants in certain places at certain times were supposed to make their labor invisible, but there have always been servants who still had to interact directly with the masters of the house?! Yeah, there are potentially really messy ethics here, class divisions are bullshit, but I don't think that completely ignoring the reality that humans have ALWAYS been doing work for other humans is better than just including some well-paid and well-treated servants and employees? Because a complete absence of them, especially where logically for the worldbuilding there MUST be servants (and probably exploited servants, or worse, for some particular worldbuilds to work), often makes me think that your main characters just don't care enough to notice the "lower class" people or know their names.

Also, even Frodo Baggins had a gardener and Samwise Gamgee might be the best damn character in the story?! Sam saved the world?! Servants are PEOPLE. Servants are often the funniest and most interesting characters, tbh, with the most to say about a society and its workings (yes, Discworld is a very good book series, highly recommend), and also the joke of some romantic scene being carefully orchestrated by a stage crew of servants frantically diving into bushes to stay out of sight never gets old to me. Teamwork makes the dream work!

I don't want to gatekeep historical fiction, especially not historical fantasy, because the worlds don't necessarily have to conform to our own and may have magic and characters are often in very unique circumstances, but... sometimes I pick up a story and it's like... "Author, please tell me that you know there is a difference between a butler and a valet?!"

[soracities]

Salem Jubran, "Refugee" (trans. Lena Jayyusi and Naomi Shihab Nye), from A Map of Absence: An Anthology of Palestinian Writing on the Nakba [ID'd]

[khizuo]

The blackout in Sudan caused a severe chokehold on the flow of crucial information. The stifling absence of communication channels obstructs the dissemination of vital updates, hindering the ability of both local and international entities to comprehend the depth and dynamics of the crisis. This information blackout not only obstructs the coordination of essential services, medical assistance, and humanitarian aid but also creates a breeding ground for misinformation and speculation. The scarcity of accurate, real-time information not only challenges the immediate response efforts, but also compounds the difficulty of mapping out a comprehensive strategy to address the multifaceted challenges faced by the Sudanese population. Sarra Elhassan, a Sudanese content creator, explains how dire the situation is with the on-going blackout in Sudan on X (formerly known as Twitter). In her quick update for 23rd of Febuary, she claims that clashes are persisting in Khartoum, claiming civilian lives, while videos reveal RSF attacks in West Darfur’s Mukjar, part of an ethnic cleansing campaign causing massive displacement. In Jezira State, Tanoub village suffered casualties. The blackout exacerbates the hunger crisis, impacting 90% of Sudanese. E-banking disruption hampers access to necessities, leading to the shutdown of communal kitchens in conflict zones. The blackout’s ripple effects extend beyond communication disruptions, shaping a multidimensional crisis.

(February 24, 2024)

Hissa Al Thani's Twitter

[luulapants]

Existential despair is so common in a person's twenties, I think, because up until that point, we've had a pretty clear road map for what's expected of us and we haven't had much reason to question that map. There are still a few milestones outlined for us (start a career, get married, make babies) but more and more young people are entering the post-school world and realizing:

A) that career thing just isn't happening like they said it would

B) I'm not ready to get married/I don't want to get married/marriage isn't the sort of life-altering event that it used to be

C) I'm not ready to make babies/I don't want a baby/I can't afford to raise children right now (see point A)

And in the absence of these milestones to shoot for (which one could argue weren't the promise of fulfillment they claimed to be in the first place), what we're left with is this aimless abyss of "the rest of our lives" sprawling out ahead of us with no indication of how it will go or what we should be doing to shape it. Young people start their first jobs, find they hate them, and think to themselves, "Is this it? Am I just supposed to do this job until I'm too old to do it or die first?"

Which is, yeah, really fucking depressing!! So here's my best attempt at an alternate roadmap for young people that don't vibe with the old model. Please feel free to add in your own suggestions!

Learn how you work and what you want out of a job. Unless you've been in a job-specific training program that gives you hands-on experience, your first jobs should be experiments. Learn how a full-time job feels for you, what elements are more or less difficult. Different workplaces have different cultures and expectations - what do you need out of a job environment? Do you need to find fulfillment in your job or is it enough for it to pay the bills and leave you time to find outside fulfillment? Do you want to climb a corporate ladder or are you content to hunker down as long as your bills get paid? This period of experimentation is exhausting and may feel like it's consuming your whole life.

Learn how to make time for things outside of work. Adapting to a full-time work environment often leaves you feeling so drained that you can't do anything but go home and collapse on the couch every day. That's fine - for a little while. But it can also become a habit. You need to learn how to do things after work or you'll go crazy. Go to a trivia night. Start an exercise schedule. Take a class in your community. Find volunteer work. Join a band. You will find that putting more things into your day makes you feel like you have more time, not less.

Find a community. Making friends as an adult can feel impossible. Where do you find these mysterious friends everyone seems to have?? This goes along with #2, though. As you start regularly attending the same activities, you will find that repeat interactions with the same people turn into friendships or at least friendly acquaintances. Say yes to invitations. Get involved in your local community. Strive to be connected enough to bump into people at the grocery store.

Unlearn bad lessons. We all internalize some messed up things when we're growing up. As you start off your adult life, that's the time to actively work at unpacking the things you've brought with you from childhood and deciding which things are helping you and which things are harming you. This might mean therapy or joining a spiritual group or reading new things or just making special time to be in your own head.

Learn the lessons you missed. In this, I mostly mean practical things. "Adulting." Areas of your day-to-day practical life that are causing you extreme stress are probably related to a knowledge or experience gap. Do you hate cooking and cleaning or were you not taught how to do it properly? Are you afraid of making medical appointments or is it just something new you're not used to? Does money make you queasy or do you need to learn how to make a budget?

Find something fulfilling. This can be your job. It can be volunteer work. It can be faith. It can be a hobby. It can be creating things. It can be challenging yourself physically. It can be activism. It can be going for walks in nature. Everyone finds fulfillment in different places. If you're not finding it where you are, look somewhere else.

[dilftaroooo]

hii new anon🎀

ex-boyfriend gojo who has an obsession over you and has been following you around. you’ve “moved on” and invite a man to hookup but he just couldn’t make u cum. as soon as the guy leaves gojo comes over and fucks you dumb.

>.<

gojo being on the sidelines before coming in to finish the job is kinda crazy. i can imagine he followed u from the bar you were in before leaning near the door to your apartment. waiting for your hookup to leave.

★tags/tw: stalking + toxicity + bathtub sex + he fucks u with his clothes on while ur bathing + fem!reader w she/her pronouns + nipple play + unprotected sex + unsatisfied sex (with ur hookup) + ummm home invasion but not, really?? + idfk I'm not a judge + gojo kinda comes in unannounced + attempt at proofread bc im sleepy so some shit might look janky.

The small dicked fucker left as soon as he spurted over your abdomen, the runny substance cascades through the crease between the start of your thighs and the edge of your pussy, which, hasn't released a drop of arousal the whole night.

The man you hooked up with had to blow a glob of spit onto your folds before he'd rub a finger on your make-believe clit, 'Yeah, know you like that. You came to the right person, sweet thing'. Why did you even bring him over? He's not even doing this shit properly. You're sure he wouldn't know where your clit laid even if you made a map and pointed it out for him. If you're gonna be cocky at least do it right.

Your hot bath gave you more pleasure since it was the perfect ratio of water to bubbles. The white foam didn't completely submerge you and you took the time to let the liquid stray you from your mind while listening to the sound of bubbles crunching from around.

Apparently, smelling the medicinal aroma of eucalyptus must've blurred the taps of footsteps making their way into your apartment and into your master bathroom.

"There she is. Taking a bath already? Your one-time fling came here, what, not over ten minutes ago and left? I'm sure you had the night of your life." The mockery in the intruder's tone was evident with each word he spoke.

His hair was still the absence of color, resembling the white sheets stacked high at the corner of your room. His skin was pale and somewhat glossy with expensive moisturizer. Aqua spheres were decorated with flecks of adorable baby blue. He's buff, perhaps buffer than the last time you saw him. But most of everything was unchanged.

He squats next to your incredulous as well as vulnerable figure in the ivory porcelain of your bathtub.

"How'd you get in here?" You inquiry.

"It's no good to leave the keys to your apartment under that more than obvious vase next to your front door. It's corny and you can get robbed that way too." He takes a peek at nipples covered by a translucent blanket. The bubbles had disintegrated leaving you exposed from the lack of foam.

You forgot he knows about the key underneath your grandmother's vase. You're the one who told him about it and you silently wish you hadn't.

"Well, congratulations on committing a federal crime. Now leave, Satoru."

"Oh, but darling you trusted me enough to tell me about those keys so I'm doing nothing wrong. Now, enlighten me, did that guy make you come so hard that he had you seeing stars?"

The lukewarm water kisses your pores in an attempt to soothe your beating heart. The scent of your ex was still riddled with that same lustful scent of mint and cinnamon, a cologne that you remember gifting him for the sole reason of how arousing it was paired with taut muscles and blue eyes.

You felt like a needy omega, shaking in the comfort of your den as your eyes water at the sight of your alpha and cowering at the pheromones leaking off his body and into your awaiting nostrils. He smells so fucking good.

"I know you heard me, sugar plum." You won't forget how much he loved to jeer at you. He wanted to hear you admit how much of a bad fuck your hookup was and how he didn't even get you to come. How you wished it was Satoru that took his place and filled your achy cunt til his balls smack your ass.

You adjust your seating when a warm palm engulfs your cheek whole. Not a trace of your skin color reveals itself under Satoru's hand. He's big even when squatting down to your size. The scowl on your face juxtaposes the grin on Satoru's.

"That's none of your business. We're not together anymore. Stop riding my dick."

"Though I do love a good ride, I think it's you who wants to do the riding, sweetheart."

Fingers crawl over your neck, down to the tops of your breasts, and onto your perky nipples. He continues to tease you by drawing circles around them making you tremble with unadulterated desire.

"Am I wrong? You can't even look me in my eyes. Bet you're not even aware of how heavy you're breathing. Poor girl. He didn't give you what you wanted. Say it." It almost sounded commanding if not for the lithe of his voice

"Fuck, hah, fuck you, Satoru..." The man cheeses.

"Right now?"

"Shit, yes."

"Knew you’d come around."

His patience must've ran thin because he didn't even bother taking his clothes off. Only unzipping his flyer to pull out his aroused dick and fleshy balls before joining you in the now cold water.

You were still his pretty princess as you took him in deep into your cavern, the bath water that surrounded you sloshed with every dominant thrust Satoru pounded you with and you did nothing but moan the name of your supposed ex like a vintage record player.

"Was he able to reach that spot that you liked hit, baby?"

"Mm-mm." You muffled.

"And why is that, huh?" His cock has that cute upturn that repeatedly nudges at your slimy walls which encourages your arousal to spill and combine with the bath water. You were better off taking a shower.

"Because he wasn't you." Your words came out in increments as he beats your pussy raw. The sound of almost every syllable slurred like a drunken man's tongue.

"That's it. You got it now, darling. You still missed me, didn’t you?" The fabric of his clothes is now soaked due to his stubbornness but there was no room for complaints when cotton and denim cling to jutting muscles. The pink of his areolas revealed itself under wet clothes. His nipples were as hard as yours. “Let me show you how it’s done.”

[lokisgoodgirl]

Open Skies [Loki x Reader]

A link to my Masterlist is HERE Summary: Loki's first time flying the Quinjet is a memorable one. Warnings: 18+ Only Minors DNI. Smut. Loki x Female Reader. Silly things. Mutual pining. Oral (M). (w/c 2.2k)

Tony dangled the key between his thumb and forefinger. The fob swung in front of Loki’s smirking face. “To Virginia, and back again,” Tony said. He was not in the mood for games. Loki’s eyebrows shot up. He pressed his fingers to his chest in mock-hurt before extending the cup of his palm out, fingers unfolding with a graceful flourish. “I need to learn, Stark..." he postured innocently. “The simulations only go so far. You know that.”

“And you’ll behave?” Loki rolled his eyes. “What egregious sin could I possibly commit with your garish vessel while under the watchful eye of our trustworthy Agent here?” he said, flicking a finger towards you. “Is that not why she has been chosen for this farce? To keep me in line? To make sure I don’t damage this metal substitute for masculinity?” Tony’s eyes darted in an aborted eye-roll. He sucked his bottom lip between his teeth, observing Loki with suspicion. “It should only take you twenty minutes- if that,” he said, tossing the fob in the air. The god caught it. Loki let you walk ahead up the ramp. The weight of his stare clung to your ass like wet paint as you made your way to the front of the craft and slid into the passenger seat. He paused, giving both headrests a squeeze as he observed the screens. You watched his profile stiffen, a swallow working his neck. For all his breezy pomposity, he was nervous. “Just like the simulator,” you said, “you’ll be fine.” Loki's face remained unchanged by your re-assurance. He cleared his throat, tugging at the sleeves of his sweater; the one with the Avengers logo that he swore the first time he saw it that he would never wear.

He manoeuvred himself into the driver’s seat. “Is he watching?” he asked quietly. You pressed the screen, making the rear camera pop up. Tony stood below the under-hang of the landing area, arms folded. “Right..." Loki said, lips pursing.

He ran his palms down the tight chinos creased to his thighs. One long finger tentatively pressed against the central screen.

In a matter of seconds, the Quinjet’s engines fired to life. Loki flinched. His fingers flexed before their length curled around the lever sitting between you. He pushed it into elevate. "Thirty-five-thousand feet..." Loki murmured to himself, pressing a series of buttons on the screen.

He reached up, pressing an intercom above his head.

"This is Loki Laufeyson, Avengers Unit, Stark Tower," he said, gazing out the huge window at the skyscrapers.

His voice made goose-bumps ripple on your skin. It massaged over the syllables like crude oil over glass, thick and utterly erotic in its uniform sincerity. “Lifting off - flightpath expected from New York City to above Richmond, Virginia. No target, no landing. Training exercise, thirty-five thousand feet. Copy?”

He released the button. Static hummed. Loki’s fingers readjusted around the lever. “Copy, Mr Laufeyson." the radio crackled. "Clear for take-off. Route mapped. Any changes, let us know.”

Loki let out a small, satisfied sigh. He shot you a weak smile. “Good?” he asked. You nodded. His hair was tied back in a messy bun, delicate strands falling around his face. It framed his cheekbones perfectly. “Try not to be too aroused by my piloting-skills, Agent,” Loki goaded, turning his attention to the thrusters. “I have been practising very hard to make it seem effortless.” He pressed several more buttons without a pause.

You and Loki had hooked up for several weeks just before his most recent mission. But whether it was clarity during the absence, or simply lack of interest; when he had come back no moves were made on either side. On your part, it was simple terror. Being with Loki in that way was unbelievable the first time that it had happened, never mind the seventh, eighth, ninth. Part of you didn’t want to push your luck. It had crossed your mind that he had actually forgotten. And if that was true, then you didn’t want to know.

The force of the ascent pushed you back into your seat, facing forwards. Out the corner of your eye you saw a grin stretch over the god’s face as the New York skyline became mere dots below. He yanked the lever a few more times into position, setting it in cruise. The beep of buttons and the hum of the engines were the only sounds. Ahead, there was nothing but open skies. “Well done, I’m very impressed,” you said with a smile, shifting to face him. The seatbelt dug into your shoulder. Without realising, you had set a hand to rest on his thigh. The two of you looked at it, eyes rising to meet. One of Loki’s brows cocked. “Agent?” he growled. “Are you trying to seduce the captain?”

You were about to deny it. But he was the god of lies, after all. In which case there was no getting around it. And even if there was – did you want to? “Yes.” you said. Loki barked a small laugh of disbelief, turning his eyes back to the wide windows. “It will take more than that, Agent.” he said, offering a small nod to the hand resting mid-way up his thigh. “Especially after giving me the cold-shoulder on my return.” Your stomach dropped. “I did no such thing-” you started, but Loki had begun to tut. It’s slow methodical click ticked over the air between you. His eyes never left the blue sky out the front of the Quinjet. “On the contrary. On my return, I came to your rooms. I left a note, and quite a suggestive one at that. I made myself quite vulnerable, actually.” You frowned. “Loki, I moved rooms like three weeks ago.” Loki pressed a finger to his forehead. “Who’s in your old one?” “Scott.” “Ah,” Loki said, grimacing. “I was wondering why he had been particularly familiar of late.” The god shot you a sheepish smile. “I may have gone into great detail about oral sex in my correspondence.” “Giving or Receiving?” “Receiving.” The two of your burst into raucous laughter.

Loki took his hands from the steering wheel, wiping a tear of mirth. “In defence of my uncouth written request, you do give the most glorious blowjobs,” he muttered, offering a tilt of his head. “And it was a very long mission. I was in desperate need of attention.” “Did you ever get it?” “No. Although in hindsight, Lang did attempt to ease my disposition.”

You and Loki exchanged a restrained smirk before bursting into laughter again. “I feel terrible,” you said, starting to feel giddy. “I thought you weren’t into me anymore, so I just…” “Gave up without a fight?” Loki said, pressing a button and shifting the stick. “Understandable. I am rather intimidating.”

Your hand began to dance up his thigh, following the rise of his insane quad muscle. You squeezed. The fingers slid inward, brushing the growing bulge in his crotch. Loki shifted in his seat, chinos rustling. “Agent…” he warned. But his eyes sparkled.

The god’s legs widened in the generous seat. Creases ran thick across his spread thighs, the outline of his cock stark against the light fabric. It stretched up to his hip by the side of the zipper. You bit your lip as he thrust gently into your cupped hand. “We shouldn’t…” you said, tracing the length of his cock with one light finger. “No,” Loki breathed. “But we will.” The click of your seatbelt and the resulting flurry of your fingers at his buttons was instant. Loki raised one arm to let you work, lowering the tight zipper and setting his cock free with a bounce into your waiting hand. “Fuck,” he choked through ragged breaths, “Agent you don’t have to-” You looked up at him, head pressed back against the rest and the veins in his throat tightening. He had that stoic, regal set upon his features, cheekbones hard and unwavering, mouth closed as he stared at your with hungry eyes. The only thing that gave him away was the sound of small puffs of air flaring in rapid succession from his nostrils. Without looking, you could tell his knuckles were white on the wheel. One of his forearms rested on the nape of your neck.

“If you don’t think I want to suck your cock, Laufeyson,” you whispered, pausing to place a kiss on the leaking tip, “then you’re even crazier than I thought.” Loki inhaled sharply as you swallowed him. The breath caught in his throat, forcing its way back through a series of stuttering breaks that made desire thrash deep in your cunt. Fingers wrapped around the base of him, you worked slowly back and forth until his manhood was slippery with spit. Your face lowered on to the bottom of Loki’s sweatshirt with every dip of your head. Sucking wet and hot as the vein that ran the length of his cock throbbed against your tongue. There it was, that sweet saltiness pearling at the cracked creases of your lips. God, how you’d missed that. The taste of him. There was nothing like it.

Loki’s placid moans filled the cockpit. It was polite, in a way. Gentlemanly, while his slender fingers grasped delicately against your hair. You lingered at the crown, running your tongue against the sensitive underside.

Loki jolted in his seat. The Quinjet took a dive, and you froze - cushioning his glory with your tongue as the god corrected the flightpath. He chuckled, hissing as you tightened the grip of the fingers around his root and began to pump in time with your mouth. “We’ve reached-uh...g-gods, Richmond,” he stammered. His fingers grasped at your hair, knees beginning to tremble. “I’m carrying out a soft turn, bringing us one hundred and sixty degrees before returning to the original..f..f-fuckk-flightpath.” Humming approval through a mouthful of his cock, you lost yourself in the warm musk of his public hair. The metal zipper caught against your chin, grazing with every deep dive of the god into your throat. But you didn’t care. Loki’s gentle whines were all you could hear over the engines, panting praises and murmurs of lustful promises that you would hold him to when this thing landed. If it landed.

“Gods-” Loki choked, punctuated with a thump as his skull fell against the headrest. "How can you do this to me, Agent?” he gasped, rubbing your back as you quickened the pace. “You’re the best…” he moaned, hips rising to meet the bob of your jaw, “you’re the b-best I’ve ever had..I- uhh...”

The god’s fingertips dragged down your back, fist clenching and unfurling. He let out a primal grumble. “I’m going to cum, darling-” he growled. “Has anything c-changed?” You shook your head, saliva dripping down the side of your mouth and pooling in a wet patch on his chinos. Swallowing all the spit you could, you pressed your lips tighter around his girth, sucking furiously. Loki flinched with pleasure; and although you couldn’t see him, you knew his eyes were rolling back. You’d bet a few more of those slutty little curls had come loose too. Loki’s bucks were quicker now. He was trying to be restrained, but still his hips shuddered against the seat trying not to fuck your mouth with all his might. The Quinjet thrashed to the side, immediately correcting.

The god’s breaths were heavy, unintelligible filth falling from his lips and slithering into your ear as you worked him. "Good girl," he gasped, palm flying to the window my his side, "oh, f-fuck yes...good girl-vakker... just like, u-uh-" His palm slid down the window with an obscene squeak.

With a curse-littered groan, both of his arms went flying up behind the headrest. He pulled it forwards, the force of his abdomen’s clench pressing against your forehead. Loki’s hot cum hit the back of your tongue, filling your mouth with the sweet tang you craved. It kept coming, spreading into every pocket of space not occupied by his meat. His groans of pleasure filled the cockpit while you swallowed - pretty little moans snaking from his throat as he rode higher than the clouds.

Your lips left the tip of his flushed member with a slurp. Loki looked at you, dazed and slut-drunk. His seed glistened at the corners of your mouth as you squeezed his cock from the base a final time. A thick ream of cum blossomed at the opening. With one finger, you scooped it off, placing it carefully on the tip of your tongue.

“How I’ve missed you,” Loki slurred before his mouth was on yours.

You could feel his tongue search your own, tasting himself on each caress, swallowing the mess that you had made of him. Breaking apart, you took a moment to appreciate just how fucked-out Loki looked. The god’s cheeks were flushed, his lips raw and pink from rough kisses; his tied-up hair was askew, one side falling down in inky tendrils across his shoulder. The sweatshirt was rumpled, and there was a spreading wet patch on those lovely cream chinos. “How long do we have?” you asked, realising that you probably didn’t look much better. Loki’s eyes flickered to the screen. “Three minutes.” he said, disappointed. As Loki nailed a perfect landing, you made a final check of yourself in the window’s reflection. His knuckles trailed gently down your bicep. “I’ll see you inside?” he asked quietly. His pupils were still bottomless pools. “At your rooms,” you smiled, fighting to contain a laugh. “Not Scott’s.” Loki nodded agreement, lips curling. “I really did wait, you know.” he said. “I know.” you said, tucking a strand of hair behind his ear. The two of you disembarked and Tony was waiting for the debrief exactly where you'd left him. He seemed happy with everything, by and large. But his arms remained folded. You began to make your way into the Tower. “Laufeyson. A word.” Tony barked. Loki rolled his eyes, subtly gesturing for you to go on ahead. “How’d you like her then? State of the art?” Stark hummed, gesturing to the Quinjet. Loki raised a brow. “It was perfectly fine.” Loki said. “Not ‘the best you’ve ever had’?” Tony slipped his sunglasses down his nose. Loki’s brow furrowed. “Cameras?” “Cameras,” Tony replied, tossing Loki the key-fob. “I’ll delete my evidence if you hop on back and delete your evidence with some of that magic-bleach. Deal?” “Deal.” Loki sighed.

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