#a rambling essay but an essay nonetheless

[clairedaring]

Okay, I dare not reblog your response to the essay post because the length of it is already too much, so Imma continue/reply through this new ask instead! ---------------

First: Thank you! I'm delighted that you enjoyed my rambling essay so much! And if it's good, it's only because you asked the right questions and gave me this opportunity to yap! An answer is only as good as its question allows it to be, after all!

-----

Assuming that the paper receipt Win found in the last episode implied his missing? dead? dad was also caught up in some money laundering shady business at the temple, I think Win will play some kind of double agent character in S2 where he’s forced into both running shady temple business all the while reporting back to the RDJ-looking cop.

YES! I think Win's gonna find himself in a teeth-clench cooperation with Cop RDJ (and the feelings might be mutual until maybe the two of them reach an understanding as S2 progresses)!

That cop seriously has more things going on with him beyond what we glimpsed. He has very personal goals he wants to achieve—whatever means necessary. Could he actually be a personal friend of Win's father? Or someone who used to work with him? Is Win's father the common thread between Win and Cop RDJ?

I'm very interested in his side of the story, man!

----

To be honest, they’ve ended Monk Dol’s arc so well, I really don’t want to sacrifice his character’s integrity and beliefs for the sake of the narrative but I also badly need him onscreen again as the only character with a moral compass in this series full of peope without it ಥ_ಥ

Sadhu, you nailed my struggle! I know I shouldn't be attached, but bro, I am. Too late!!! Y'all made him too charismatic and earnest in his practice and conduct, and now you created one of the best religious-affiliated characters I've ever met in my personal list of fiction.

Imagine if Monk Dol was a real person I know!!! Yo, I'll do anything to be his kalyāṇa-mitta ("noble/virtuous friend;" Buddhist friendship characterized by camaraderie in helping each other improve while practicing The Noble Eightfold Path. It includes chastising each other for unskillful conduct, etc).

I like to point out that Monk Dol was also written to be afflicted with the Three Poisons (klesa) through his attachment to Dear, so he's actually flawed despite being the best boy person in the series. He showed delusion (moha) such as thinking Dear could ever be with him and that he should disrobe to be with her. He showed attachment (rāga), most obvious in his dream of Dear and that scene in the bathroom. The only klesa he exhibited the least, even when he had grown attached to Dear, was aversion or hatred (dosa), but it was still present—in his quiet resentment and growing regret over becoming a monk at too tender an age. He was growing averse to his life as a monk.

So I think, one of the many functions Monk Dol provided in สาธุ was also about a Buddhist's valorization of growth from mistakes. Instead of characterizing his lapse with Dear as a sort of fall in morality or failure in his religious duty, the emphasis was placed on how Monk Dol overcame his delusion. In Buddhist ethics, moral progress is extolled—more so than moral duty and moral adherence. It's all about effort, striving, and using your mistakes to learn; Monk Dol's character arc exemplifies that. One of the Buddha's lauded disciples was Aṅgulimāla, a serial killer, after all.

Okay LOOK I REALLY LIKE THIS GUY, OKAY

------

Whatever happens in S2, I hope S2 gives me lots of Monk Dol internal struggles, nothing I love more than a tortured gentle, kind soul (@ สาธุ scriptwriters, please don’t use my beloved Monk Dol as a sacrificial martyr though, HE’S SUFFERED ENOUGH) getting a bittersweet, hopeful-ish open ending.

OH SHIT. I... I'm also a sucker for tortured gentle, kind soul!!! Ahhhhhhh!

--------

I LOVE the scene you chose to make your new gif.

Because this Dhamma talk was probably the hardest-to-understand of all. I'll tell you why...

In this one, Monk Dol was explaining upādāna ("clinging; attachment"). However, he wasn't talking about the usual stuff about attachment like "don't be attached to money" "don't be attached to beauty" or "don't be attached to fame."

He's talking about attachment to things Buddhists think are good. Meditation. Making merits. Offering alms to monks. The rituals. He's saying that one should not even be attached to these good things. "It's easy to be attached to things that feel pleasant. But we should not be attached to them, too."

It's very counterintuitive. Buddhists are taught that all of these stuff are good and moral, so why not be attached to them?

Because if you're so stuck in doing them, it will also start to become a burden to your mind, and then it turns into suffering. But there's also more to it!

The Buddha had an analogy for this (I forgot in which sutta/sutra, though. Bruh yapped way too much and had a shit ton of sutta in the Pali Canon). Paraphrasing from my memory here:

The Dhamma is a boat. When you want to cross the river and reach the other side, you use the Dhamma (and related tools). But once you reach it and are now on land, do you still hold onto the boat? No. You discard it, having no longer need it on land. To cling to anything when it's no longer required causes dukkha.

This is what Monk Dol was also saying in that talk. Samadhi ("wisdom") during meditation is nice and pleasant, but true samadhi is knowing when to be detached from the pleasantry of meditation so that the "bliss" of it doesn't distract you from your real goal (of Enlightenment).

And this, I need to stress, was the Dhamma talk Monk Dol was giving in his first appearance. I was absolutely floored and impressed, man, because this isn't something someone with a more pop culture understanding of Buddhism can come up with. Again, fucking props to the scriptwriters and their advisors; they really know their shit!

----

Okay yea I am done rambling ahahhaha. Please, if you cook more The Believers gif set I will EAT THEM SO GOOD. I wish more people are into this shit, goddamn. And I can't wait for Season 2!!!

(You have no idea how happy I am to find a fellow appreciator like you!)

Thank you Lyn for once again blessing me with even more insights into the brilliant writing and details in the characterisation of Monk Dol (i don't deserve this. cries happy tears ಥᴗಥ. months and months of waiting and lurking in the สาธุ tag for fellow สาธุ appreciators has finally come into fruition. i truly have no regrets spending hours screencapping สาธุ. always said they were purely self-indulgent but i must admit i always secretly hope people would come across them and gave the series a chance).

I didn't think I could love Monk Dol more but you have truly proven that Monk Dol is truly in fact best flawed boi monk. In a series with such a sensitive topic, I understand that careless writing could have easily made him a terrible character or cause great controversial or mixed reactions but I do think the writing for Monk Dol was just sophisticated enough and it feels like there's much care in the crafting of his character (my beloved Dol).

Kudos to Pup who plays Monk Dol as well, because I would have never guessed that he isn't a professional actor but the frontman of a rock band (funnily enough i've been listening to Potato (his band) forever but i didn't register that they're the same person until I started watching interviews and they start asking Pup about how does it feel to transform from a rock singer to a monk).

i shall end this ask with a gif encapsulating my exact reaction of Monk Dol's first Dhamma talk/sermon

[snow-and-saltea]

yesterday i spent 45 minutes of my life watching a video essay criticising the use of cheap shock values and crossing of taboos for a video game and i went from "he has a point even if he's explaining it in a really inflammatory way" to "oh umm... i can see how he thinks that way even if i don't agree" to "oh this guy's just straight up using people on tumblr as material for an audience to get mad at like other outdated people on the internet. nvm he's just an asshole"

[traumxrei-archive]

trying to study peacefully and then i see this:

THANK FUCKING GOD I DECIDED NOT TO ROLL FOR HWEEN PART 2 *CRIES*

JAMIL YA HABIBI YA HAYATIIII !!! IM GONNA TAKE YOU HOME I PROMISE !! (this is gonna be motivation for me to study....i'm doing it for you jamil viper >:DD)

[age-of-moonknight]

Can I just say youre my favorite account on this app.

I really like your commentary on the tags, man <3

Shoot, favorite account on the whole of tumblr.com??? !!!! Thank you so much, anon, for saying that because I'm going to treasure this message 'till the end of time and you genuinely straight up made my week. 🤍🖤 Please excuse what may be repetition of a sentiment I have expressed here before, but I still can't get over how you (and the other individuals who have said as much and who I equally appreciate almost beyond words) also derive something from what all some random guy leaves in the tags and how novelly, indescribably happy it makes me, so thanks again! I'll keep on posting no matter what, but it is doubly, I guess, motivating??? energizing??? knowing that I'm sharing this with other people and there's the possibility of perhaps brightening their day a little as well. :D

[unadulterated-syd]

ethan landry x gn!reader

synopsis — a funky way of doing dating hcs

this is how i see ethan,, if u don't like it that's okay !! but this is how i'll continue to write him <3

(he's not the killer in any of my fics bc im in denial)

ethan landry, somehow the coolest guy in your eyes whilst also being the biggest loser you'd ever met.

when it came to dating him, it was a total shock. not necessarily that you'd managed to get with him, but more so that he'd had the guts to ask you out.

it started with inviting you to little hangouts, eventually managing to ask you on a real date. though he hadn't even told you it was a "date" inviting you to see a movie with you under the assumption the whole group would be there.

'i heard this movie was sooo good, dude.' you'd mentioned, walking with him as you held your ticket.

'yeah, that's why i wanted to take you..' he hummed nervously, almost fumbling at ever crack in the sidewalk.

only for him to reveal minutes into the previews that it was a date, and that no one else was showing.

'where are they, dude, always late.'

'about that...!'

nonetheless it didn't take him long to win you over, he was a loser but so were you at heart. not to mention the amount of times he'd gone on and on about random things.

rambling all night, with no clear plans for the future. it never mattered who was there, or what about, as long as he talked.

you liked his voice, and he liked yours.

'no way that'd work he'd have to have like come down and unleashed hell or something insane—'

'can you losers shut up, i can feel reddit waiting to swallow me up because of this' mindy shouted from the kitchen of sams apartment.

'shh mindy he's onto something!' you defended, rolling your hand in a gesture to continue as he let a bright smile escape.

or how at parties he wouldn't drink, because he was scared he wouldn't be able to handle it well. he didn't want to get to clingy, or whiney, he knew he'd be like a lovesick puppy.

and when you drank so much that you'd force him to slow dance inside the crowed house— to loud club music.

'y/n...' he protested, as you pressed your weight against him, hollering lyrics he couldn't be bothered to memorize.

'hush, dude, im totally dancing with my boyfriend right now.' you called loudly, over the music.

and some nights you'd sneak up his fire escape, and stay the night as you told him all about your day.

sometimes while you were over you could convince him to let you draw on his hands— as much as he complained his heart jumped whenever chad asked why he was covered in poorly drawn stars.

'my english teacher gave me a 58 on my essay today, i need you to study with me next time.' you sighed, scribbling stars on his knuckles.

'i could write it for you' he hummed, eyes trained on his phone idly, 'unless you wanted to spend time together—'

and when he could be, he was wrapped in your arms. he never really liked to explain himself, and you never asked.

and when he'd drunkily told you it was because you made him feel safe, he was in your arms even when he couldn't be— at work, in class, anywhere. because you wanted him to be safe.

'you don't think im a loser do ya' he slurred, the crown of his head pressed into your collarbone, as he looked up at you.

'no, pretty, i don't' you whispered, your eyes trained forward, watching as chad drunkily took his turn of some dumb guess who game.

'thanks.' he grinned, not looking away from you, 'your like— like a knight or something. keepin me safe..'

'yeah, okay princess.' you teased.

—

tags -> none !

send an ask to be added to the taglist + hes not in my character list bc im lazy but send in for him anyway :))

[amerricanartwork]

I want to say I love reading your headcanons, especially your Iterator ones. Do you have a unique headcanons for Pebbles, since you haven't talked about him much?

Ohhh, I'm so glad to hear that!! I love creating and typing down these headcanons, but sometimes I worry whether anyone actually wants to read these long posts about it, so it's always so nice to hear people appreciate them!

I would love to talk more about Five Pebbles! I actually have quite a few headcanons for him specifically since I tend to ponder him a lot. In fact, of all the canon characters, when it comes to headcanons that aren't purely working out their general personality and backstory I think I currently have more outside headcanons for him than anyone else.

But nonetheless, assuming you mean "unique" as "interesting and relatively uncommon/unheard of in the fandom", here's one of mine that might seem odd or specific, but I really like it!

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

I’ve headcanoned for at least a few months now that Five Pebbles is very much an auditory learner. He’s more receptive to spoken and auditory information than just written text, and as such he tends to talk a lot, which is how he best formulates his ideas. 

Now, when I call him an auditory learner (or maybe just an audio-oriented person in general would be a better way to describe it), I also mean he generally cares a lot about how things “sound” to him. Five Pebbles pays close attention to how certain sounds “feel” in a sense, not just with regular abstract sounds, but spoken words, phrases, and ideas too. He likes it when sentences flow smoothly, convey the proper emotion or idea, and sound intellectual and well-thought-out, and dislikes when phrases sound clunky, confusing, or otherwise unprofessional and improper. In situations where he wants to appear smart and sophisticated, especially in a competitive sense, he loves flexing his extremely large vocabulary by throwing in long and obscure words and technical jargon too. To reference my last headcanon ask, this trait is another quality making him dislike NSH, who doesn’t care as much about grammar or syntax and thus tends to speak in casual ways Pebbles finds “improper”.

Usually, when he has a decent amount of uninterrupted personal time, Pebbles will spend several hours on end just talking to himself in his chamber to work out his ideas and plan any essays or speeches he’s preparing to give. He loves making sure that every sentence sounds pleasing, proper, and is grammatically correct, yet still explains his ideas thoroughly and accurately. However, despite being an introvert who values his alone time, he sometimes talks about his ideas to other iterators, especially when he wants feedback and criticism. In fact, having long discussions and debates, particularly about scientific, artistic, and philosophical matters, is perhaps one of the only things he actively enjoys doing with other people.

In this latter regard, this habit was actually one of the only reasons he occasionally, yet still actively sought out the presence of Unparalleled Innocence, someone whom I headcanon he never had much of a relationship at all with, positive or negative (at least pre-AU, that is). But nonetheless, Innocence is a very good listener and never declined an invitation to talk with him, though more often than not it turned more into him just rambling about something and her quietly listening and encouraging him to continue on (which she did for… other reasons besides her fascination with the subjects of his speeches, but I will get to those some other day…)

Another facet to this headcanon is that Pebbles has a strong appreciation for music. He finds it helps him calm down and work through his emotions very well, alongside one other habit I’ll address in a more official headcanon post. Thus, he’s got various music pearls with his favorite tunes that he’ll listen to while working or when he needs to relax. The purple one in Rivulet’s campaign is only one of many, though that was also the only one he could obtain at the time his chamber was broken into by the rot. 

His love of music has always been another little “worldly pleasure” that he took for granted, not realizing just how much he enjoyed it until after mass-ascension. And even then, he stuffed it deep inside him and kept trying to downplay its value to him all the way until his rot condition was almost at its climax. This emotional turmoil I imagine him having is a particular element of his character arc I find very interesting even in regular Downpour canon, but once again I will elaborate on it more later…

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Anyway, there's the headcanon! Seeing as I'm planning to explain major character info in official headcanon posts, I tried to choose one that wasn't too essential for narrative comprehension, but is still unique and hopefully decently entertaining in-and-of itself. I also tried to use this to test a new format of doing more sketches for these headcanon posts, so it's not as much pure text.

Anyway, I hope you like it! And if you (or anyone else reading this, for that matter) ever want more headcanons, or can add to this one, don't be afraid to send another ask!

[blurbios]

Being Dabi’s Doting S/O (Part 2)

cw: none

other: gn! reader, fluff

follow up to this

As odd as it still felt when Dabi thought about it, he had gotten used to you caring for him. The mission Shigaraki had sent him on was a long and tedious one, no intense fighting, but tiring nonetheless. He was absolutely exhausted, the only thing that kept him going was the thought of seeing you light up when he walked through the door. Nobody told you that Dabi was coming home that night, so you were sitting in bed, typing out an essay for some random college kid that commissioned you. You started writing papers as a side hustle after having met the league so that you could help keep the lights on in the place. You were nearly finished when you heard the doorknob turning. “Ah, you’re home! Nobody told me, I’m sorry. Should I run you a bath? Did you eat?” You rambled on and on as he walked closer to you, visibly fatigued. He sat on the edge of the bed and leaned back, you quickly moved the laptop from your lap, careful not to delete your hard work. 

“I missed you.” He looked up at you, his head now resting on your thighs.

“I missed you too Dabi, I’m glad you’re back.” You ran your fingers through his messy hair. “How bad was it? Because I’ll fight Shiggy, I don’t care.” You hated seeing him look so drained.

“You don’t have to do that, it wasn’t bad. It just took too long, don’t worry.” He laughed a bit at the thought of you actually confronting Tomura. 

“I always worry, you know that.” You smiled down at him, taking a second to take in what was happening. Not one sarcastic remark, not one hand swat, he was nothing but genuine. He brought your free hand to his lips and placed a gentle kiss on each individual digit, you could feel the smile on his lips as he did so.

“I love you, y/n.” he said looking up at you admiring your features. He still had a hard time saying it, but he couldn’t believe that you were his. 

“I thought I was supposed to be the mushy one.” You joked. 

“Maybe you’re rubbing off on me too much.” He retorted like normal. He sat up and turned toward you, taking your hands in his. “Sometimes I think you’re too good for me.” You raised an eyebrow, taken aback by the sudden sincerity. “You’re so caring and kind, you shouldn’t be around people in the league, people like me.” His eyes dropped as he felt a bit ashamed. 

“If you really think all those things, you have to tell me what I can do to make those thoughts fade.” You removed your hands from his grasp and placed them on either side of his face. “I love you, Dabi. I want you to realize that you deserve good things too.” You inched closer to his face, so he had to look at you. “I mean it, I love you, more than anything.” He leaned forward to press his lips gently to yours. You both felt heat growing in your cheeks. You felt the familiar sensation of butterflies in your stomach, the same feeling as when you had first confessed to him. He leaned all his weight on you causing you to lay down. You wrapped your arms around him as he laid on top of you. 

“Maybe I am rubbing off on you too much.” You laughed. It was nice having the tables turned, him clinging to you instead of the norm. 

“I’m so lucky to have you.” He spoke lightly into your hair as he nuzzled closer. 

“And I’m even luckier.” You placed a soft kiss on his temple. You felt so lucky that he felt comfortable with you, comfortable enough to seek you out and rest his whole weight on you, comfortable enough to be vulnerable with you, and comfortable enough to show that he loves you. You were used to him doing little things, silent gestures of love, but this was new and it made you feel treasured. After all, you were his treasure, the treasure that he was lucky enough to stumble upon, and the treasure that he would never ever let go of.

a/n: i dont think every league member is gonna get a part two, but this popped in my head and i knew i had to do it. aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh thank y’all for enjoying these lil stories i write btw makes me happy xx

[tealmaskmybeloved]

Hello

I present a new ship for my Kieran (made for the very specific audience of me)

I call it Dungeon and Dipplin shipping (or dndshipping for short)

And it's a crossover ship between TC!Kieran and Marcy Wu from Amphibia!

Headcanons + notes:

- Marcy would teach Kieran how to play DnD, Kieran would roleplay as an Ogre character (HMM WONDER WHY)

- Kieran would make Marcy a mask (even if he's not the best at it, she still loves it)

- The two ramble to each other about their hyperfixations

- Marcy gets Kieran into video games and stuff (probably TOTK let's be honest here)

- They watch 5 hour long video essays on stuff they like

- Kieran talks to Marcy about the Ogre and Marcy talks to Kieran about her life

- Also they both need therapy for getting possessed

Speaking of, since Kieran and Marcy are getting along, why not have Darcy and Dokukieran interact too?

- The two talk about their plans for world domination and such

- Dokukieran points out that Darcy should've used Bluetooth instead of wired connection.

-Darcy responds by gifting Dokukieran a blender

- The two enjoy committing crimes as a duo

- Also they hate Sasha and Carmine

These aren't really canon to the AU, but I still enjoy it nonetheless

[kafkaoftherubble]

神祗的庐山真面目

//Forms and Names

I have always wanted to write three After God essays!

The first one came at the tail end of Chapter 58 discussing Ahu’az and Yako.

The second one was something I’ve always wanted to do—an interesting mental framework to analyze Tokinaga Sachiyuki.

Now comes the third essay, ironically, the first After God ramble formulated in our Discord conversation. Hahaha. The last essay in this series is the actual first one that started it all, @orange-peel-candy!

This essay concerns my speculations and hypotheses regarding the gods’ forms... and The Man Stronger Than the Gods.

Be warned: spoilers abound up till at least Chapter 58 (a.k.a. the last chapter I read!). It's also a very, very long read.

What Do We Know So Far?

I am a two-bit detective-scientist wannabe. Before we start to speculate, we should lay out some of the facts that we already know. I hope I didn’t get any facts wrong because I’m mostly going off from memory, which is pretty corrupted from things like work, daily life, Buddhist Philosophy (yes), science, Neon Genesis Evangelion (I’m disappointed in myself for this), the likes:

Chapter 1

Out of the four, we know three gods’ animal forms.

Vollof is a rabbit,

Ahu’az is a rooster (yes, calling it Chicken God was me being an ass),

Orokapi is a snake.

Did ya notice something?

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Chinese Twelve Zodiac – the Calendar

Wikipedia

The zodiacs are used by the Chinese as a calendar system, which assigns an animal to a respective year following a twelve-year cycle [1]. The sequence  goes like this:

鼠、牛、虎、兔、龙、蛇、马、羊、猴、鸡、狗、猪

Rat, Ox, Tiger, Rabbit, Dragon, Snake, Horse, Goat, Monkey, Rooster, Dog, Boar

Vollof, Orokapi, and Ahu’az are part of this group.

So, my bold first hypothesis is that—

All of the IPOs introduced to us will be animals from the Twelve Zodiac.

I assign a modest 78% confidence level toward this hypothesis since all three we have known have come from this group.

From here, let's go through these queries:

Are the other gods also animals from the Chinese Zodiac?

Where does Allula fit in this, if the Chinese Zodiac theory is true?

Is there anything about the Chinese Zodiac, such as myths and philosophy, that may serve as story hints for certain characters in the story?

Particularly, is there some basis to make a hypothesis regarding The Man Stronger Than the Gods?

----

Query #1: Are the other gods also animals from the Chinese Zodiac?

Well, we don’t actually have that many IPOs teased other than our 4 known gods. The only one we have, here, is the furry paw. Let’s look at it again:

Chapter 1.

Hypothesis 1: This is a tiger. [50% confident;  0.85 x 0.78 = 0.663; 39% overall confidence]

Hypothesis 2: This is a dog. [50%; 39% overall]

Hypothesis 3: This is an animal not part of the Zodiacs [22% overall]

Both a cat and a dog have 5 toes in their front legs (and 4 in their hind legs). But a cat’s dew claw is much closer to its other claws. A dog’s paw, meanwhile, has the dew claw being much farther away [2].

From Hepper.com.

This mystery IPO’s claws are certainly close to each other—including its dew claw. That makes it resemble a tiger’s claw more (Hypothesis 1, or H1). Another piece of circumstantial evidence is that this IPO was walking past a street filled with stray cats. If the IPO was a dog, I don’t think these cats could be this chill.

Nonetheless, H2 has good grounds, too. For what little we see here, the paw doesn’t show a tiger’s typical strip, and the tail is a little too bushy for a tiger. There’s also the fact that these claws aren’t protracted despite not being required during a stroll. A dog’s claw doesn’t protract [2]!

We can even explain away the cats’ relative calmness by positing the IPO as invisible to their eyes, kinda like how they can’t be captured by cameras.

Nonetheless, H1 and H2 have strong enough standing. Whether a tiger or a dog, neither conclusion will counter our zodiac hypothesis.

----

There is, of course, a 22% confident hypothesis where the IPOs do not actually follow the Zodiac convention.

This opens up a lot more options for our mysterious IPO—a wolf, a lion, a cat, etc.

There is also this little panel you’ve helpfully pointed out:

Chapter 44.

There appears to be a fish IPO in this panel, which is not part of the Twelve Zodiacs. The only true aquatic animal among them is the dragon, or龍 (long)。

If the fact that a Long is actually an aquatic animal is new information to you, I’ve once written quite a bit about it in (yes, I know. Why does this bro yap so much?) an essay for a good friend explaining the origin of the dragon’s orb. Long story short: dragons are seen as the kings of the ocean and storm.

There isn’t much hard evidence to refute this “fish” IPO. One suggestion (thanks to you) is that maybe the “fish” IPO is just an NPC and that all major IPOs will be of the zodiacs. Another suggestion I can think of is that, similar to how Vollof turned from a “bear” to a “rabbit” in execution [3], the “fish” IPO might be revised to another animal among the zodiac gang in the future.

One last thing to add to the Zodiac theory in general: apparently, there’s already another IPO planned with horns [3].

Three Zodiac animals with horns have yet to be featured: the Ox, the Goat, and the Dragon. It’s another piece of circumstantial evidence, but all of it together still builds a pretty good case for the Zodiac animal hypothesis.

The way to falsify this hypothesis is to wait for more IPOs to be revealed. Mr. Furry Paw, Mr. Horn, and, potentially, Mr. Fish—all three can prove or disprove this hypothesis.

For the rest of this essay, let’s consider the Zodiac Theory true.

--------

Query #2: What Could Have Been Allula’s Animal Form?

Allula’s floral form is actually a pretty interesting symbolic choice, which you noticed. She’s a poppy flower, right? The source of opium—one of the royalties of addictive narcotics.  A really apt form for the god who introduced drugs to everyone else.

Nonetheless, this did not mean Allula had always been a talking one-eyed flower. She could very well have been an animal just like her other brethren.

According to Orokapi, Allula’s current form is a grotesque chimera of fleshes borne from the gods she had eaten. This tells us that she didn’t originally look like hair that’s been stuck in a pipe leading out from a bathroom hole.

Chapter 50

What are the animals among the twelve zodiacs that could possibly be Allula’s original bestial form?

H1- Predators: Tiger and Dog. These were the two possible candidates for Mr. Furry Paw as discussed in Query #1. Could Mr. Furry Paw be Allula?

I don’t think so. Allula has been banished into reincarnating as Waka for quite some years, and when that happened, she’d already been losing her original form and gaining her chimeric look. Hence, it’s likelier that Mr. Furry Paw was another IPO!

Then what about omnivores, like Rat, Boar and Monkey (H2)? This, to me, seems more possible. Rats are certainly seen as repulsive and disgusting eaters. Monkeys are a bit harder to square since their “stereotypical” trait(s) in the common interpretation of the 12 Zodiacs don’t really fit Allula all that much, barring intelligence (more on that later).

---

My highest confidence level (about 50%) is on the Boar.

Boars are commonly seen as animals representing gluttony in East Asian culture. They technically eat anything edible and non-poisonous.

Here’s the thing: boars can develop a taste for raw meat [4]. And they have no problem eating human flesh or pig flesh! The most common incident of cannibalism in pigs is when the sows and gilts eat piglets, called “savaging.”[5].

Now, Allula is no mother, but she’s the only known god who eats other gods. An opportunistic eater with no repulsion toward the flesh of its kind. A cannibal.

A piece of circumstantial evidence: The Boar is seen as the intelligent animal among the Twelve Zodiacs, often similarly to how one envisions the Monkey. Allula has, in a lot of interactions, demonstrated frightening analytical capacity and intellect. She often uses it as a means of manipulation:

towards the other gods, she used drugs—something they had no idea about and became addicted to.

toward Shion, she managed to charm the girl with the combination of her eyes… and more importantly, her words.

She best displayed her intellect in Chapters 54 and 55. There, she worked out what she believed Tokinagawas up to accurately enough that he was reduced to near nervous breakdown. That’s the sort of skill in choosing conversation responses I wish I have, so I can make the NPCs in my game cry like a bitch.

Conclusion? I think Allula being the Boar seems far more likely if the Zodiac hypothesis is true. 

-----

Query #3: Is There Anything About the Zodiac Hypothesis That Could Be Used to Understand After God’s Worldbuilding + Gods etc.?

The Twelve Zodiac was used as a calendar system with a twelve-year cycle. In other words, the zodiacs are associated with time [1]. Besides that, it’s cyclic. The Year of the Rat (first among the zodiac) follows the Year of the Boar (last among the zodiac) [1].

Both of these are already related to a character who isn’t said to be an IPO but is nonetheless completely intertwined with them—our boy Tokinaga Sachiyuki. Creating time loops to bring himself to his desired development is a known ability of his, isn’t it?

Keep that in mind.

Now, I’m gonna introduce to you Taoist/folk Chinese deities associated with the Twelve Zodiac:

Tai Sui, 太岁 (literally “great year” or “great age”).

Like plenty of Taoist gods, these deities originated as stars observed by Chinese astrologers—in this case, they’re the stars opposite Jupiter and are also in a 12-year orbital cycle [6].

Tai Sui are considered generals taking orders from the Jade Emperor (the lord of the heaven in Chinese mythology). They are the zodiac animals’ masters. Throughout dynasties, the Tai Suis’ numbers have multiplied into sixty of them, each mastering one animal while corresponding to one of the Five Chinese Elements (五行: fire, earth, metal, water, wood). There is, however, one Tai Sui General who is the boss of all Tai Sui; this one has no governing year [6].

That’s, of course, the Chinese’s side of things. In Japan, Tai Sui is consolidated into a single deity [6], in the form of Tai Sui’s full title, 太歳星君 (“Lord of the Tai Sui Star”)。

Tai Sui is so important and revered in folk divination that people whose zodiac animal sign is the same as the deity are said to be “clashing with Tai Sui” (犯太岁). Take the Year 2024 as an example: this is the Year of the Wood Dragon, so it is governed by the Wooden Dragon Tai Sui. Everyone whose animal sign is the dragon (no matter the elements) is therefore “clashing” with him, and superstitions dictate they appease the god because their overall luck has already tanked by the virtue of this clash.

What does this tell us?

It tells us that a Tai Sui is “stronger than these zodiac animals.”

Tai Sui, the god of time. Not linear time either—cyclic time. Who does this remind you?

More circumstantial evidence for your consideration:

The word associated with “time” is in Tokinaga’s name, 時永。 This is similar to how the word related to “time” is also found in Tai Sui, 太岁。 The difference, however, is that 時 technically means “hour,” while 岁 means “year.”

The pronunciation for 太歳星君 is Taisai Seikun ( たいさいせいくん) in Japanese [7]. The initials are T.S., which matches Tokinaga Sachiyuki. You can almost wonder if Tokinaga’s name is chosen to mirror the name of this calendric time lord.

You might think this is the end of Query #3, but there’s a speculation I want to put forward based on the Tai Sui Hypothesis.

“We Have Seen the Man Stronger than the Gods”

Chapter 49

Allula claimed that she and the other gods had seen The Man Stronger Than the Gods/God Killer before—a long, long time ago. 700 million years ago, to be exact.

Here’s the thing: Tokinaga is only 28 years old.

The big upheaval of the IPOs from the North Pole happened 30 years ago. Hell, modern Homo sapiens evolved from merely 300,000 years ago. My math ain’t no Olympiad level but methinks this math doesn’t check out.

That’s not all. Tokinaga’s power comes at the cost of body degeneration. How did this blud—whose body started to look like lichens-ate-it just by rewinding time a little to his last save point—manage to survive this long?

Another odd thing: Allula somehow does not recognize the God Killer when she sees one. Why? Why doesn’t she recognize what could possibly be the only Homo Sapien on the planet at the time? If that man was Tokinaga, wouldn’t she recognize him right now?

Tokinaga’s response to Allula’s assertion is also grounds for intrigue. He was there for a negotiation; the odds of him feigning ignorance were not too high. So why was his response “What are you talking about?” instead of knowing silence?

Why did he react as though he was stunned to hear Allula’s revelation? Was the God Killer she mentioned somehow… not him?

Granted, there are many plausible reasons to explain these odd points. We don’t know the full scope of Tokinaga’s powers. Maybe he could erase someone’s memories if he wanna (sure. Sure. Sure. Sure. Sure. Doubt. Doubt. Doubt. Doubt. Doubt). We don’t yet know what parts of the power system, such as reincarnation, are like in this story.

---

God Killer (singular?)

If Tokinaga’s aspect as the time-bending God Killer is inspired by Tai Sui, then the speculation I want to offer is that there is more than one God Killer across history.

Japan etc. and even common Chinese folks might think that there’s only ever one Tai Sui Lao Jun/Taisei Seikun, but there has always been more than one Tai Sui in the canonical myth. Tokinaga could very well just be one God Killer who exists at this time. The one Allula and fam saw back then was another God Killer.

I originally wanted to make a joke that this God Killer was from the Australopithecus genus—the hominids before our Homo genus. The problem is… the earliest Australopithecus hominin existed 4.2 million years ago. That’s not even close to Allula’s “700 million years ago.” Bro, who the fuck did these gods see? Fucking Xenu?

The nature of God Killer(s) is largely shrouded in mystery by this point in the manga, so again, any reasonable guess is as good as another. I’m not even particularly confident in this speculation, but it does lend nicely to our last query…

----

Query #4: What speculations regarding “The Man Stronger Than The Gods” can we make from this?

Although this is the last query and hypothesis in this essay, it is actually the first I’ve ever made since reading After God months ago.

The thing that kickstarted this was in his name.

As someone who’s immersed in Thai and Buddhist-Hindu myths, his name was eye-catching for featuring the word “naga.”

Britannica. This is an artistic depiction of Nāga in Thai style.

Nagas are, briefly, divine or semi-divine beings—sometimes half-human and half-serpents, sometimes basically sea serpents [8]. In common translations as well as general understanding, however, nagas are understood as dragons.

They are often associated with bodies of water.

The origin of the nagas is closely related to snakes. In Sanskrit, nāga is one of the many terms for “snake,” and the earliest concept of nagas is cobra-like [8].

These three key points are bolded because these traits are shared with the East Asian concept of the Long (龙) as well. According to Yuan Jing, a Chinese archaeologist researcher, the origin of Chinese dragons (which other East Asian long are derivative from) likely evolved from a snake or a crocodile [9]. For example, artifacts recovered from the Taosi Archeological Site (陶寺) in Shanxi showed Long that pretty much just looked like snakes [9]. This connection is also speculated to be why “dragon” is positioned next to “snake” in the Twelve Zodiac. The dragon and the snake are kin.

And who, my dudes, is Tokinaga’s dearest friend?

Even an East Asian dragon’s “connection to the body of water” can be seen in Tokinaga’s character traits—chiefly, his avoidance of bathtubs and his strange discomfort with showers. You might correctly point out that it’s odd for him to be written as repulsed by a “body of water” if he’s indeed related to East Asian dragons, but a big theme of Tokinaga’s personality intrigue is the fact that he’s in discordance to himself. His self-hatred originates from his inability to resolve what he detests and what his “nature” desires. He’s like an Asian dragon who hates water.

Oh, but there’s more to this hypothesis. Much, much more.

-----

Fake Ancient Scripts That Repel Evil

Chapter 31

Well, the characters on his loincloth-ass mask seem pretty likely to be 日本, “Japan,” to me. You're not even trying, Orokapi.

We know that the eyepatch hides Tokinaga’s empty left eye socket where some of the deterioration is found. So what’s the character on his eyepatch?

The eyepatch, interestingly, was framed nicely within the last panel as Tokinaga dropped one of the earliest hints about the God Killer.

I’m gonna go and guess it’s based on “竜”, or “dragon.”

It’s that, or 龟, “tortoise/turtle”.

How do we decide which of these is likelier? Well, show us the hand!

----

It's not a hand, you dumbass. It's a claw.

Chapter 42

This chapter is the first time when we get to see the claw that haunts Tokinaga. It features really sharp nails and scaly skin. Below are a tortoise’s nails.

Animals.net

The nails in a tortoise appeared to be closer to each other that our mysterious claw up there. The claw is also far leaner in the panel, compared to the more bulging (thicc?) look of a tortoise’s foot.

Based on this, I think the odds that the claw belongs to a tortoise are lower than our alternative: the East Asian Long/dragon. But do we have more proof?

---

How many nails does a Long have?

Five claws may seem ubiquitous in more modern drawings of the dragon, but it’s actually a relatively new invention during the Qing Dynasty [10]. In truth, for the longest time, the dragon has had three claws—and the dragon types that were most likely introduced to Japan are the three-clawed and four-clawed Golden Dragon (金龙), both popular during the Tang Dynasty.

Baidu. Tang Dynasty dragon-adorned mirror. Try to locate its claws.

Now, we can combine both knowledge.

Tokinaga claimed that these fake scripts are used to repel evil.

One of them is found in his eyepatch. A writing that may very well be 竜.

What is this eyepatch guarding against?

The thing that is frequently drawn to be close to his left eye is the mysterious claw. A claw that can be reasonably suspected to belong to a dragon.

Does that eyepatch repel... or seal a dragon?

Chapter 55

No matter what it could be, it still points to one general direction:

Tokinaga has a lot of connections to a dragon.

-----

Verdict

This is a combination of all of our hypotheses to form a pretty damn bold speculation about The Man Stronger than The Gods.

Tokinaga may be a God Killer, not the God Killer. He has aspects influenced by Tai Sui and dragons—a mythical beast that is also one of the Twelve Zodiac.

We already learned that there are actually a lot of Tai Sui deities, with 5 governing a single animal of different elements. So, if the hypothesis is that the God Killer is not one person but many people...

Is Tokinaga a dragon-related God Killer? Similar to a Dragon Tai Sui?

-----

Last words

This has been an insanely long read, but it covers a lot of the speculations and theories I have had about After God thus far. There’s a lot we don’t know yet, and it’s always likely that I get a lot of stuff wrong. I have a specific image for that occasion:

Ajin.

Nonetheless, it’s been really fun trying to Allula out the story with what we have so far, and I’ll be really stoked if even a small part of all of this comes true!

Let me know what you think in the comments or tags! I love responses and add-ons; I read ‘em all! They make my day.

Thank You For Reading My Ramble! I hope this has been an eye-opening thrill for you!

P.S. To people who recently followed me for After God content: welcome to my garden! I do have to tell ya—I’m not very prolific an essayist due to my general lack of time. I also write essays for a lot of other things too—this is the last of my After God Three Part essays, and I haven’t had any planned after this. So, yea! Please enjoy what I've cooked for now! Ahahaha.

------

Citations:

Chinese zodiac. In Wikipedia. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chinese_zodiac

Cat Paw vs. Dog Paw: Vet-Verified Differences (With Pictures). Hepper. https://www.hepper.com/cat-paw-vs-dog-paw/

Inspiration for Vollof (summarized). On Tumblr (Thanks, Ko!). https://www.tumblr.com/kossanctuary/756356794456113153/inspiration-for-vollof-summarized?source=share

What Pigs Can (And Can’t) Eat: Ultimate Guide. Savvy Farm Life. https://savvyfarmlife.com/what-pigs-can-and-cant-eat/

Normal and Abnormal Behaviors of Swine Under Production Conditions. Pork Information Gateway. https://porkgateway.org/resource/normal-and-abnormal-behaviors-of-swine-under-productions-conditions/

Tai Sui. In Wikipedia. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tai_Sui

太歳星君. In Wikipedia. [In Japanese] https://ja.wikipedia.org/wiki/%E5%A4%AA%E6%AD%B3%E6%98%9F%E5%90%9B

Nāga. In Wikipedia. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/N%C4%81ga

世间动物千千万，为何是它们被选入十二生肖？《澎湃》。[In Chinese] https://www.thepaper.cn/newsDetail_forward_24694111

中国古代的龙，到底有几个爪趾？《百度·文艺时光》。[In Chinese] 中国古代的龙，到底有几个爪趾？ (baidu.com)

[epickiya722]

I'm new to the JJK fandom, and after one month of interacting with the fandom, I noticed that many view Gojo as a womanizer. I believe it to be false.

Maybe it's because of that one time Gege commented that he doesn't see Gojo being faithful to a woman (that man looks like a twink, so I don't blame you, Akutami). Nonetheless, I do not believe it means that Gojo is a playboy/ fuckboy.Let me tell you: while Gojo got the looks, it does not change the fact that he got no hoes He's a hoe repellent no matter the gender.

He is that type of guy that is really handsome, but the moment he opens his mouth, your perception of him changes so much that you would find Deadpool's left ass cheek more attractive. Hell, even Toji's worm. My dude is annoying as hell. He is rude, tactless, and privileged. Add to that the fact that he might also have mommy and daddy issues  because I'm sure he was not treated like a normal kid (but that is another discussion for another time).

Gojo might also have a lot of trust issues combined to the fact that he tends to isolate himself by not letting himself get too close to others. Like this guy is the strongest sorcerer, and his birth caused a shift in the Jujutsu world. Since his birth, people have been trying to kill him. Even the higher up in Jujutsu, see him as a nuisance and are waiting for the opportunity to do him dirty and you to tell me that he doesn't have trust issues? He has infinity on all the time, to the point that he does that subconsciously, and you want to tell me that he's gonna drop that just to get laid? So that he can get  a cursed technique aimed right at his balls?

And even if he is a playboy in the sense that it's not sexual and it's just emotional cheating. The dude feels like no one can relate to him. No one understands what it's like to be at the top, to be the strongest. So what would be the point?

I like Gojo, but in real life, being in a relationship with this man means you'll probably be his therapist because I know this guy has a lot of issues. At least he got money, so you'll be compensated I guess?

I'm rambling a lot, and it's not structured, but I also do not want to write a whole essay in your ask box.

In conclusion: It must be the cash cause it ain't your personality or whatever Beyoncé said.

What do you think?

When I tell you that "womanizer Gojo" is one of the characterizations I hate that some of the fandom has given him I HATE IT.

This is why we take the time to reread something and better understand it because in what world does a womanizing Gojo fits? Especially, in canon when it would be hard to maintain a romantic relationship given the risks Jujutsu sorcerers take? And with the description you gave are other reasons why Gojo wouldn't have a significant other.

Let's be honest, if there was one person who could handle Gojo it was Geto. This isn't me saying this as a shipper, but just stating a fact.

Like, if he would have a romantic partner, it would have him. Shoko's their friend, yes. But that is the most that she sees herself as. Chapter 220, she states hell would freeze over before she falls for any of those two. She's aware of the flaws they both have, but that doesn't she didn't want to be there for them.

One thing I like about Gojo is that despite the reputation he has as a sorcerer, he got his flaws that make him human. Just me, but I don't see the point of adding more flaws to him if I like him already as he is. Like, come on. Just make an OC, at this point.

I know sometimes canon can suck, but fanon? Is worse sometimes.

It's like how some people will depict Yuji drinking and eating anything because "Oh, he's a total dumbass".

I hate that. Yes, Yuji states he's dumb, but he has displayed he does have intelligence and sometimes even he ain't with the bullshit with others. When he said he'll eat anything, it was more on the lines of "I'll eat a cursed object to save people" not "I'll drink gasoline because I was dared to".

Like, damn, he ain't that careless! He ain't that stupid! (Just giving him the Kaminari treatment, huh?)

Just... I wish more people actually stop and think about what they're reading instead of running with it and going with a depiction that others say is "canon" (it's not) or "better than canon". Especially, with a media that isn't from your native country.

[whimsicalcotton]

Hi it's me the mf with the polluted marrow brainrot, and I bring you semi-coherent rambles about Marrow Max that were brought on by a song I recently found that just fits her like a glove IMO.

(CW: mentions of suicide & suicidal ideation. Just to be safe.)

The other day I discovered a song called Gifts For The Earth by Deafheaven and idk if it's just me but it gives HEAVY marrow max vibes to me. It's a metal song & the vocals are VERY screechy, so I don't know if you'll like the song itself? Although I think the music itself is really good, but the vocals are still a bit distracting to me even after like 20 plays lmao

ANYWAY yeah my main point is the lyrics feel so fitting to Marrow Max's mental state at her lowest point. The song itself is basically about someone giving up their life and surrendering to death through suicide, depicting images of an angel of Death comforting them as they sink to the bottom of the ocean to become one with the Earth once more.

These metaphors make me think of Marrow!Max so much, like I can perfectly imagine her looking over the cliff during the storm at the start of the fic, feeling drawn to jump into the ocean, as Chloe had done once she found out about the time loops. Feeling beckoned to end it all just like her; to let the ocean waves take her in so she can finally stop the suffering.

(Hell, maybe she actually does in a nightmare she has later on, when she thinks she's gonna lose everything in the new reality… Of course she wakes up, and the terror she feels over losing everything might just make her realize how much she needs Rachel and Chloe, and it pushes her to stop running from them. Or maybe they find her and wake her up from her nightmare, as she sees a figure appear through the darkness of the ocean waves, and then Max wakes up, and realizing they're there, eyes filled with concern for *her*, she fully breaks down in sobs)

It could also be read as a metaphor for Max drowning under the weight of all the responsibility she's thrust onto herself, to save Chloe and the others. Plus the ending lines about the flesh disintegrating into consumption for the earth fits how she can no longer see any benefit to her existence beyond what she can do for others, and how she can save or help them. Completely divorced from any sense of self-worth, she gives herself entirely for the sake of others with no concern for her health.

There could also be a read of the song where it's about Max basically killing off/shedding any part of her that is irrelevant to saving Chloe & Rachel, as everything she once was is drowned in the ocean of her subconscious, letting her become single-minded in her purpose. I guess the angel of death in this case would be Chloe, whose safety she puts above everything else? This one is a hell of a stretch but I find it fascinating nonetheless sfhsdfjkshdl

Anyway uhh sorry about the rambly essay in your asks 😅 I just love this AU & fic and cannot stop thinking about it and wanted to share some of the brainrot with you while waiting for the next update; hopefully you enjoyed reading! & if you like the song too even better!

i see what you mean abt the vocals but i am Also a big enjoyer of good percussion/tonal whiplash music/songs that go on for a Really long time so i had a good time w this one actually! thanks for the rec ^^

also don't even worry about it i dearly dearly love reading ppl's rambly essays about this AU sjdkhfsjhfk <3 (that goes for anybody btw never worry abt being rambly in my inbox bc i am probably sitting here uncontrollably happy-stimming abt it)

👀👀👀 to all of these scenarios/readings also. good fucking food

[yeosangs-horizon]

One Call Away

Genre: Fluff | Friends -> Lovers | Pairing: Rei x Reader Word Count: 5.4k Content Warning(s): Mention of abusive parent Author’s Note: There may be a part 2 to this coming out soon!

You let out a sigh as you put on your gaming headphones, glancing to the side of the massive pile of papers and textbooks next to you that you knew you had to burn into your mind before your final exams. A bit of a break wouldn’t hurt right? You switched your status to online and hovered your mouse over you friend Rei’s profile.

You were deprived of human contact besides your roommate but you hadn’t seen them in awhile either as the two of you were busy gearing up for your finals, thankfully the last time you would have to do them as you would be done with university by the end of the month.

‘Wanna race?’ you typed to Rei. His instant response to you didn’t surprise you at this time of night, he would go on benders sometimes, gaming for nights in a row. He was someone who you could talk to online, although you had never met him you didn’t feel as if he had malicious intent and therefore trusted him. He wasn’t much of a talker, but he would listen to you ramble to no end. You had met him through an online forum that you would post your gaming highlight reels on and he seemed to interact with your posts every time, despite having a vast following you had noticed his interactions.

You messaged him and the two of you started chatting. It was mainly about Morio Kart, sharing techniques and talking about your favourite builds. It branched into other games the two of you shared in common too and one thing led to another and the two of you would play games together. You hadn’t spoken to him for awhile though with your busy schedule and his, as far as you knew he told you that he and his roommate were private investigators but kept pretty quiet about the specifics about his job. Nonetheless you missed him, you loved late night discussions with him, even if it was one sided. 

‘Sure.’ he simply replied. ‘Call or nah? I have a lot I wanna catch you up on’ you typed, hoping that you could get him onto a call. The two of you called a couple times in the past, you always initiated first as you picked up that he was pretty reserved. His voice took you by surprise at first, you knew that Rei was a man, but wasn’t expecting his voice to be so deep and… attractive. You hadn’t seen his face yet, but you already found him pretty attractive with his personality and voice. 

Rei looked around his surroundings, the reason why he had been so preoccupied recently and hadn’t been calling with you was because of Miri. The incident where Kazuki took in a little girl of the father that they had to kill during a mission took up most of his time. With finding a suitable daycare to buying supplies, and almost rendering the two of them broke, he had to cut back on gaming. Things were slowly going back to normal though, as normal as things could be with raising their new daughter that they had taken in. She was passed out on the couch next to him, but he usually didn’t talk that loudly anyway and Kazuki was taking a nap, why not? He turned his mic on in his headphones and pressed the button on your profile to call you. 

“What’s up Rei?” you chimed as you connected to the call. “Exhausted. Finally have some time for myself though…” he mumbled, trying not to be too loud. You had to turn up his volume. “Gah yeah, tell me about it. I’ve been so swamped with essays and studying for my finals. What’s been on your plate?” “I have a daughter now,” he bluntly spewed out. “What?” That was something you were not expecting from him, not in a million years. You had always known him as an isolated being, just wanting a kitty to accompany him but had to live with a rowdy couch crasher but took care of him. Was he seeing someone this entire time? Was it his? “You mean a cat right? You finally adopted one?” you asked lightheartedly, hoping that your previous thoughts weren’t true. “No. A little girl.” 

Damn, so it was true. The few months of getting to know him and developing bits and pieces of feelings for him shattered immediately, or so you hoped as you felt a pang in your chest.”With who?” your voice cracked a bit, hoping it wouldn’t be heard on Rei’s end. “Um during our work we ran into a little girl who was convinced that Kazuki was her papa. He looked similar to the guy in the photo she was holding to find her papa so he took her in. Now I’m kinda… forced to be a father too.” He sugar coated the fact that he had shot her actual father and now they are dealing with the consequences of their line of work. “Oh haha! So you weren’t seeing anybody and accidentally had a kid?” “(Y/N) you know how much I despise children… I wouldn’t do that, but Miri is ok… you’d like her.” You let out an invisible sigh of relief, knowing that he wasn’t seeing anyone as far as you knew. 

“That’s adorable Rei. You’ll be an amazing father! Let me know if you need me to babysit sometime, I’m surprisingly good with kids,” you joked around. You hadn’t even met him in person yet, but was this an opportunity amidst your joking manner? “(Y/N) I know you said you’re in the area, but maybe… in the future… you could?” Rei and Kazuki were exhausted by parenthood, they were looking into getting her a babysitter for the times when they would have to go scope or execute their missions in the middle of the night. “Wait actually?” “Yeah… maybe.” He was eager to lessen the load for their roommate and contribute something for once, and have a chance to meet you. Rei’s face flushed a light tint of pink, thinking about the idea of meeting you after so long. 

“Rei Papa, who are you talking to?” The sound of a little girl suddenly chimed in your headphones. You smiled a bit, Miri called him papa, how adorable. You heard him groan on the other side. “Miri go upstairs and tell Kazuki to put you to bed.” “But papa I’m not tired! I just slept! I wanna play Morio Kart!” She started to throw a tantrum. “(Y/N) I’ll message you later. I need to deal with Miri.” You chuckled, hearing him go into ‘parent mode’. “Sure, I’ll talk to you later Rei.” With that he hung up, and you grinned to yourself. He’s so adorable. Now that the highlight of your night was over, you rubbed your eyes and shifted your head towards the textbooks and papers again. You could only procrastinate for so long. You groaned as you grabbed your psychology textbook, getting back to it trying to shove Rei to the back of your mind.

You groaned as you felt your back crack, lifting yourself up from your desk. What time was it? It wasn’t the first time you had fallen asleep like that studying at your desk. Your back ached though from your posture, when had you even fallen asleep? You heard a ‘ding’ from your phone as you picked it up. It was already noon? You usually didn’t even sleep in this late. You swiped up to see your messages, two of them from Rei. ‘Sorry ‘bout last night. Do you think we could meet?’ ‘Miri wants to meet you, and we need a babysitter.’ Your heart skipped a beat, Rei was asking to meet you? You trusted that he wasn’t some creepy old man with bad intentions, you heard Miri last night too, you had to trust him that his situation was real with how much time you’ve spend with him.

You replied back, ‘Sure, what are are you located in? We can meet in public first, but I trust you.’ He sent a location at a nearby mall in the city, that was only a couple miles away from you. ‘No way that’s so close! We could meet there, when were you thinking?’ you texted back eagerly. ‘Today. If you can, at 3?.’ you started to feel giddy, you always loved meeting friends you got close to online and Rei wouldn’t be the first. Your heart started to race a bit, wondering what he looked like and if he would be the same as he was online. ‘Absolutely.’ you replied, rushing to get changed into a nicer outfit. 

Rei looked down in his phone, feeling a bit nervous now knowing that he was going to meet you in person. He had never initiated any plans with anybody else besides Kazuki before. This was foreign to him. You meant a lot to him, somebody that he could sit in silence with sometimes and he enjoyed listening to you ramble, even if he knew that he wasn’t the one to give the best advice. Through the months that the two of you had gotten closer, he also developed some sort of feelings for you although he did not know how to put it into words. He had told Kazuki the night before about your offer to babysit Miri to lessen the load for their missions and he was ecstatic. He picked out a nice suit to wear, trying to look nice for you.

He put his hair back, sideburns showing as he would usually do on his missions. He walked out of the room, tie in hand, knowing that he had to ask Kazuki to help him as he always did before their missions. “Kazuki…” he called out in routine. The blonde turned his head and gazed at him all dressed up. “Rei what’s all this for, I thought we were just meeting your friend at the mall, not going on a mission.” Rei had realized that too and started to blush as he averted his eyes from Kazuki’s direction. He caught on pretty quick. Grabbing the tie in his hand he gently put it around Rei to help him out. “Oh Rei, trying to impress them I see?” he said with a smug smile. “No…” Rei muttered. “You usually don’t give any effort in what you wear when we take Miri out to go shopping, you like em don’tcha?” he giggled. “I don’t know…” Rei answered dryly, still looking away from Kazuki with a blush. “Well in that case, I should dress up to par with you too, don’t wanna be looking like the housewife or anything and maybe I’ll impress em too!” he teased. Rei shot him a glare. “Alright I’m not some partner stealer don’t worry.” “It’s not like that,” he grumbled. Kazuki stepped back after helping Rei with his tie. He shot him a smirk. “Yet.” 

You spritz on a spray of your favourite scent. Looking in the mirror, you had a modest fashionable outfit on, trying to look your best for Rei. You picked up your phone and realized that it was already 2:45 PM. You were going to be late. You grabbed your keys and exited your shared apartment.  Your roommate caught a whiff of your strong vanilla scent that you put on and turned their head. “Headin’ out on a date?” you heard them remark. “Uh, something like that!” you shrugged whilst rushing to put on your shoes and head out the door. “Stay safe! Call me if you need an excuse to leave!” You smiled to yourself, heart racing as the time ticked down to the moment you were going to meet Rei. Surely it wouldn’t be that bad, you enjoyed his company online, even the silences became comforting at this point instead of being awkward.

You rushed towards the meeting spot, checking the time every once in awhile knowing that you still had a ways to walk. By the time you got to the entrance of the mall that Rei had texted you that they were at, you were out of breath. Hiding behind a corner, you decide to straighten yourself up and wipe the beads of sweat away from your forehead before approaching them. You took a deep breath and hoped that you didn’t smell gross from the exercise you had done to get there. You peered your head around the corner and looked down to see a little girl at your feet. “Are you (Y/N)?” she beamed. 

That must be Miri, you thought. You nodded and stammered, “Yes I am! Are you Miri?” You glanced your head up to see a blonde and a darker haired male standing not too far away looking in your direction. That must be them! You wondered which one Rei was, you had a feeling that he was the one in the suit and slicked back hair. You giggled, he’s cute. You stepped out from the shadows. “My papas wanted me to meet you!” She exclaimed with joy. She really was a bundle of happiness if you’d ever seen one. You glanced up at Rei whose eyes were widened now after noticing you and held up a hand in a slow wave. You ran towards him, time stopping a bit as you crashed into him with a hug.

You felt one arm around you patting your back awkwardly as you pulled away, a bit embarrassed as you were normally pretty touchy with the people close to you. “Sorry Rei, uh, it’s wonderful to finally meet you!” His cheeks tinted pink as he gave you a half smile. “(Y/N)... I don’t mind… this is Kazuki and Miri.” He began, mumbling the first part. “(Y/N)! Don’t I get an introductory hug too?” Kazuki joked, opening his arms up. Rei shot him a glance. You shrugged and accepted it, he patted you on the back with the embrace. He was shooting daggers at Kazuki. “Miri too!” You heard the brown haired girl exclaim. You smiled, kneeling down to pick her up as she giggled. “She seems to take a liking to you already,” Kazuki cheered. You smiled and nodded. “So (Y/N), down to be our babysitter? I’m sure Rei has already told you lots about our situation,” he grinned. “Of course! When do you need me?” He looked at Rei. “Tomorrow if you’re not busy um… but if you wanna see our apartment and familiar with things we can right now… or if you want to game,” he added the last part with a hush. “I’d love to Rei.”

The four of you walked back from the mall entrance to Rei’s flat. You and Rei trailed behind, walking in silence as Miri begged Kazuki for an ice cream cone as she noticed a stand with colourful decor. You stood next to Rei, appreciating your time with him. “You look really nice, the suit fits you.” You commented, feeling a bit shy now.” His expression softened as he glanced at you. “You’re really pretty…” he mumbled. You felt your lips tug into a smile as you blushed. “You’re sweet. I’m glad you’re just like how you are online and not some creepy human trafficker.” You joked trying to feel less shy. “Hate those kinds of creeps,” he mumbled. “Me too.” You leaned back against the wall as you watched Miri choose her ice cream flavours and Kazuki chat up the lady at the stand. You went to stretch your back as you heard a crack and lost your footing, falling into Rei who was also leaning against the wall.

Instinctively, he reached out and caught you before you smashed your head on the wall and grasped your arm. His loose strand of dark brown hanging down brushed against your face as you shifted your orbs to meet his. He’s beautiful. Realizing the predicament you were in, you hoisted yourself back up. “Sorry ah, I had a long night of studying and fell asleep at my desk!” You exclaimed, noticing his hand still having a hold on your arm. “I don’t mind…” he blushed as he slowly let go of your arm, the two of you not wanting to break contact. You looked towards the distance and saw Kazuki and Miri walking back with an ice cream in hand. You turned towards to Rei who was still flustered. “Let’s go.” 

The group arrived at the apartment and you stepped in, gazing at the luxury. I guess that was how two private investigators spent their money. “C’mon (Y/N) let me give you a tour so you know where things are for tomorrow!” Kazuki beamed. Miri followed behind closely, wanting to talk to you more. “I’ll have food prepared so it’ll be in the fridge on the top shelf, just reheat it and it’ll be good to go!” He whispered the next part. “And the pudding is in this box. Rei and Miri love pudding.” Miri’s ears perked up. “Pudding! I want pudding!” Rei turned his head too as he was messing with his consoles to prepare for you. Kazuki shook his hands frantically and hopped away. “Quickly uh, over here is where the emergency first aid is kept, never know when you might need it, and Miri’s bedroom is upstairs with the flowers on the door!” You peered down as you felt a tug on your pants. “I want to take a nap. Sleepy…” Miri mumbled. You looked at Kazuki. He sighed as he bent down to scoop her up. “Guess I’ll put her to bed now.”

You stepped away as you looked towards Rei, already sitting on the couch and gestures for you to come. You sat next to him and looked on the screen. He had already set up Morio Kart for the two of you to mess around in. He handed you a controller as you smiled. “Never thought we would be able to race together in person.” “I’ll beat you…” he said with enthusiasm in his tone. After a while of racing, you won more races against him fair and square as he sulked at your gloating. “I lost on purpose for you…” he mumbled, a half true statement. You giggled and leaned towards Rei, resting your head on his shoulder as your leg touched his. “I’m glad I could finally meet you y’know.” He hummed in agreement as he set his controller down. Kazuki hadn’t come down in awhile, assuming he had put Miri to nap and also fell asleep there himself.

The room was dark at this point as the two of you had been playing for awhile. The only light was illuminated from the TV screen, giving light to his facial features as you looked up to admire him. You felt his hand shift from his lap to gently touch yours. Your fingers mindlessly danced around his as they found their way in between his. It felt right. You relaxed against his comfort as he stiffened up, not used to this touch and physical contact. “Am I making you uncomfortable?” You asked with worry. He shook his head. “Just never had this…” you knew a bit about his past, about how rough his father treated him but not in detail and he wasn’t one to socialize around and be touchy. But he felt your hand in his and it felt comforting to him, he liked it.

Your phone lit up with a notification as you noticed the time. It was already 8 PM and you had an essay due that night. You jolted away from your position, startling Rei. “Shit sorry, I just have an essay due soon. After playing with you last night I tried to study and just passed out I’m sorry!” You apologized, knowing you had to get back and it was a walk away. “Wait (Y/N), let me drive you.” He was so thoughtful but you didn’t want to inconvenience him. “Are you sure?” He nodded firmly as he stood up to grab the keys to the car. 

You sat in the passenger seat and looked out at the window at the illuminating lights that made your face glow. You didn’t notice but Rei was staring at you at the red light. You were stunning to him, and he knew that he had fully fallen, the butterflies churning in his tummy was a dead giveaway. He had never felt anything like this before. “Sleep after you finish your work… in your bed ok?” He asked with a soft tone. You hummed. “I’ll try. What time did you want me at your place?” “Around 5. You can bring your work too if it’s too much. We’ll pay you too for your trouble…” Rei offered. You shook your head. “No need. Just take me on a date…” you mumbled the last part. “Hm?” He asked, hoping you’d repeat the last part. You lost your sudden confidence, fearful that he would not reciprocate. “Nothing, just thanks for the ride! I’ll see you tomorrow!” You beamed whilst exiting the vehicle. He watched as your figure disappeared into the darkness of your apartment complex. He couldn’t wait to see you again. And for the record he did want to take you on that date. 

You ran inside to get started on your essay with an hour or two to complete it. Trying to push Rei out of your mind for the time was difficult, the day went so well. You thoroughly enjoyed his company and had fallen for him harder than before. He checked all of your boxes in a potential partner and not to mention that he had an adorable daughter and was so thoughtful. You would have been able to fully focus if you hadn’t received a text an hour into your focused mindset from Rei that said ‘sleep well’ with a kitty blowing a kiss emoji at you. 

The following day you were exhausted. You had managed to turn in your essay on time and spent some more time studying for your finals that were coming up in about two weeks. Groaning, you knew you had to get out of bed as you had chores to do, it was your turn to clean the apartment this week and pack your things to head to Rei’s place later to babysit Miri. Shoving your textbooks and laptop into your bag, you hear a notification from your desktop and saw that it was from Rei. Your face automatically lit up as you clicked to open his message. “Need a ride?” As much as you wanted to be with him as soon as possible again, you decided that the walk was needed to get some fresh air before committing to more work again. ‘I’ll walk to destress a bit, but I can’t wait to see you again!’

As you walked out of your room to vacuum the apartment, you seemed in a happier mood than usual as your roommate noticed you from the kitchen table. “Date went well yesterday?” they asked grinning at you. “Uh yeah! Gonna babysit his kid today,” you remarked. “Damn (Y/N), getting it on with a dad?” they smirked. “Nah it’s not like that, just a special circumstance.” “Well just make sure he’s not a player or a liar.” “He’s not like that, just an extreme introvert who loves to play games,” you smiled. 

Rei stared at himself in the closet, knowing that had to wear stealth clothes to blend in with the public, meaning just his regular attire and not a suit. He wanted to impress you again, a bit fearful that you wouldn’t find him attractive with his hair down. Kazuki caught onto his tension and made his way over. “Relax, I have a feeling that (Y/N) likes you for you, don’t worry about it too much.” He tensed up with embarrassment, not knowing that he could give away his emotions that easily. “How do you know?” “Just trust me Rei,” he grinned. Just as you were on the topic of their conversation, they heard you knocking on the door and an excited squeal from Miri as she came running from her bedroom.

Rei was the one to quickly rush to the door to greet you. “Nice to see you again Rei. Missed you,” you added with a giggle. He felt his heart race a bit as you flirted with him. “You too,” he stuttered out. Miri ran between the two of you and wrapped her small arms around your legs. “(Y/N)! Papa Rei, do I get to spend time with them tonight when you’re gone?” Your gaze softened at Rei after hearing Miri call him papa. The more time you spent with him, the more qualities you saw in him to be a good father, even if he was distant and didn’t act like an adult at times. “Yes Miri, we’re going to be out for awhile. Don’t give (Y/N) a hard time.” She nodded with enthusiasm. He gazed at you again, taking in your comfortable sweater that you had on you and your sweats. You didn’t bother dressing up today as you were focused on chores and your homework. You caught on his gaze and chuckled, “I got busy this morning, sorry for not looking my best,” you excused.

He shook his head, “No you look… stunning,” he confessed. You noticed how casual he looked too and imagined that he would be looking like that when talking to you. “So are you,” you smiled. The moment was interrupted by Kazuki swinging his arm around Rei’s neck. “Watch it…’ Rei mumbled. “Let’s go or else we’ll miss the check-in time!” Kazuki exclaimed enthusiastically. You assumed that they were doing some private investigative work tonight. “Oh hey (Y/N) have fun with Miri tonight we’ll be out for awhile!” You waved at him as they walked out the door. “Good luck!” you called out, now turning your gaze towards Miri. “Papa told you where the pudding is! Gimmie!” 

Spoonfuls of pudding later, you put on her favourite TV show for her to watch as you got started on an assignment. You were in the zone before you heard a ‘ding’ from your phone, a notification from Rei. ‘Hope Miri isn’t giving you a hard time.’ It wrote. You smiled and looked at her and replied. ‘Not at all, she’s watching her show and I’m just catching up on some assignments. I miss playing games with you on the couch though :(‘ Miri noticed your preoccupation with your phone. “(Y/N) you’re done with your homework already? Can we play Morio Kart?” You glanced down at her and sighed. “Not yet Miri. Unfortunately I was just got distracted with your papa texting me.” ‘Ding.’ Another notification. “Me too. It’s so boring here at this festival with Kazuki. I wish I could have brought you.’

You smiled at his text, imagining yourself on a date with him there. ‘Me too Rei. I’ll put Miri to bed soon and wait for you to come back. Stay safe ok?’ You put down your phone as Miri was looking at you with widened eyes. “What did my papas say?” she asked curiously. You smiled and shook your head. “Nothing too important, Rei just said that he was bored doing his job. I can imagine that takes a lot of time and patience.” She nodded and turned towards the kitchen. “I’m hungry (Y/N).” You glanced down at your half finished assignment and the kitchen. You suppose dinner couldn’t hurt your progress. 

You served Miri dinner and had some yourself. Kazuki made pad thai, something you really liked and the flavors hit just right. You didn’t know how he knew, but you guessed Miri liked it just as much as you. The only person you’d told that to as of recently was Rei, perhaps he had spilled the beans to Kazuki about your favourite food, how sweet. You took initiative and washed the dishes for them, knowing that it must be tiring coming back from work to doing more chores. Soon after you tucked Miri into bed and read her one of her favourite bedtime stories. Closing the door behind you, you made your way down into the living room to finish your assignment again. Putting in some of your favourite tunes on the TV, you got to work but not before texting Rei that Miri was tucked away in bed and you were going to try to get your assignments done. He left you smiling by writing to you, ‘Be back soon. Things are going well.’ and reacting to your message with a heart. 

You knocked out two assignments before midnight. You wondered when Rei and Kazuki were going to be home, and by this time your eyelids felt heavy and you were quickly losing concentration in your textbooks. You weren’t sure when you passed out but you were softly snoring on the couch when the duo walked inside the flat. Rei’s eyes instantly fell upon you, looking at how the moonlit illuminated your skin and your peaceful expression. Kazuki noticed and whispered to Rei, “I’ll leave it up to you. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.” He got a slight smack on the shoulder from Rei. 

Rei quietly made his way next to you, but not before grabbing a blanket from the extra closet they had. He sat down slowly, hoping to not disturb your sleeping state. He draped the soft blanket over you whilst placing a hand on your cheek. He knew that he was in love with you. You made his life so much easier and was there to support him and trusted him enough to babysit his kid and come over to his house on the first day of meeting him. He felt himself smile and let go the angst that he had. He ran his fingers through your locks whilst leaning down and placing a small kiss on your forehead. He didn’t want to leave your side. He wanted to feel your palm in his again and your touch. You stirred in your sleep, making him a bit startled but still caressing your cheek. “Rei…” you mumbled half coherent about what was going on. His gaze softened whilst staring at you, letting himself admire you against the moonlight. He was definitely going to take you on that date to make up for your hard work today.

You shifted as the morning sunlight hit your eyes. Moving around, you felt your back hit against a warm wall and slowly, you realized that there was someone behind you. You gazed down and saw an arm that was draped over you and the sound of quiet breathing behind you. You took it to be Rei instantly. You looked at your mess of papers around the coffee table and realized that you had probably passed out a bit after midnight in their house. You felt a bit guilty for staying over without asking and unintentionally, but you couldn’t help feel a bit flushed in the cheeks as your heartbeat started to race after realizing that Rei was cuddling you.

You saw the blanket over you and realized that he had probably come home to find you passed out on his couch and didn’t want to leave you to freeze in the middle of the night. You smiled, gazing at his mouth half open and messy brown locks that splayed across the couch and his face. Letting yourself feel comfortable in his embrace, you felt him shift and bury his face in the crook of your neck. “Good morning to you too Rei,” you mused. He opened his eyes and found his limbs with yours. He jolted up a bit, startling you. “Ah shit, I thought I was dreaming. Sorry for… that,” he sheepishly stated. You stared at him, realizing that he may have feelings for you too. Fuck it. You closed the distance between the two of you and captured his lips in yours.

You felt his hand cup your jaw and pull you in closer. After a heartwarming kiss, you pulled away and giggled. “I like you a lot Rei, I didn’t mind waking up to you cuddling me this morning. It was so adorable.” He looked down and replied in a hush, “Me too (Y/N), does this make us…” he trailed off. “I’d love to be yours. I’ve had feelings for you for awhile y’know.” He pulled you into another kiss, wrapping his arms around you and embraced your warmth. 

“I’ll take you out on that date, thank you for taking care of Miri and loving me.” 

[lampbroby]

Need to write this down somewhere so:

Fairy Tail and Gender

A self-indulgent Essay on why I enjoy Fairy Tail!

[Before I get into this, would like to say this is mostly personal opinion and I will not be debating anyone :)]

So, this all began when I had begun to wonder, "Why don't I enjoy One Piece when I love Fairy tail?". They both stem from pretty similar themes and plots, and I admit that One Piece is a good show! It's just not something I could bring myself into for some reason.

And it gets me to thinking, objectively Fairy Tail is pretty not great. The writing can get repetitive, arcs are forgettable, and just overall it's kinda mediocre. But nonetheless, I ADORE it! It could be partially due to nostalgia, yet around the time I started Fairy Tail as a kid, I had also picked up and dropped One Piece, so what stopped me then?

It all came back to one thought! Treatment of different genders.

Of shounen anime, I can't think of many that make female characters on equal power standing as male characters (never mind even having them as main characters).

As great as One Piece is, their treatment of women in story and relevance is something that always draws me away from it.

Fairy tail is very good at making women who are equal power standing to the male characters, with some of them being even stronger! Not to mention the story treats them with equal relevance and gives them the same amount of depth that the male characters get. Lucy, Erza, Gray, Natsu, (and the many side characters that I adore) all have rather equal amount of back story. Though there is some power gaps, for the most part these characters are all really strong, and grow with each other as well!

Now let's get to the part we are all thinking about and why Fairy Tail has its reputation: The fan service.

Fairy tail had an ABUNDANCE of fan service and raunchy humor, but one thing I can admire on this subject is they acknowledge it! 90% of the show's fan service consists of characters knowingly making raunchy jokes, and this goes for both genders!

I will like to clarify that they do go into some pretty strange territory sometimes, and there is no excuse on that but for now i'd like to focus on the more comedic bits.

For example, every joke about Lucy is usually balanced out with a joke about Gray! Any fan service with the women characters as subjects will then often be turned over to the men ALSO being subjected to fan service!

This essay is getting messy and unorganized but idc its a tumblr ramble.

My other point I really appreciate is the women are very self aware! The show doesn't write the fan service as "oh this helpless and cutesy girl doesn't know shes teasing men by existing with big boobs :(". The women are well aware of their surroundings(for the most part) and will joke about it themselves! The women who are used mostly for fan service do it of their own will, rather than it being an accident of some sort? MiraJane chooses to model for sorcerer weekly, Lucy purposely uses her "womanly charm" and so on! It's all things they chose to do and not pushed on them!

Overall I just think that the show is pretty good at its gender balance and keeping the men and female equal. Whether it's on power levels, intelligence, back story, social consciousness, and yes, even fan service.

So as bad as the writing can get for main plot, the vast amount of well written characters with varying experiences, as well as how the characters are treated balance it out for me!

[neverenoughmarauders]

Prongsfoot headcanons?

​I am going to be so disappointing! 

Also, why answer in two sentences when I can answer WITH AN ESSAY?! Headlines provided to at least make some sense of my ramblings!

Canon

Sirius and James are SUPER close; they are being described as inseparable. Sirius is never shown to have any interest in girls despite it being very clear that he's spoilt for choices. 

All we learn about his life post-Hogwarts pre-Potters' deaths are that he was James' best man, James' son's godfather, that he was in the Order with James (and his other friends), that James wanted him to be secret keeper and that James trusted Sirius to use Peter as secret keeper (and even just writing that breaks my heart). Upon finding out James is dead, Sirius' first reaction is to try to take care of James' son, and the second is to go after the man that betrayed James (and Lily, Harry and Sirius).

He spent 12 years in Azkaban, blaming himself and escapes once he's worried for James' son's safety. The rest of his life is dedicated pretty much to keep James' son as safe as possible, and he dies protecting James' son. I will note though that he speaks more about Lily than say Remus speaks about Lily, and there's that letter in DH. It's fair to call it canon that the two of them cared about each other.

You know this... I just feel like it needs saying over and over because there's so much love there without any interpretation! <3

Headcanon

My headcanon has never been particularly creative. I've just always imagined that Sirius was in love with James (James was aware), and while James couldn't return those feelings, James obviously loved Sirius to pieces. Just as James accepted Sirius' feelings, Sirius accepted James'. I believe that if Sirius and Lily hadn't gotten along, James would never have married Lily, but I also believe Sirius mourned Lily too and cared about her deeply, obviously driven by how happy she made James.

Anyways, that's why I suck at writing ACTUAL Prongsfoot (apparently I can't write things that break my own headcanon except to write stricter canon stuff), but I love reading about it and seeing fan art because I just want my boys to have a good time.

Some Headcanons/moments

I've heard people say Sirius couldn't cast a Patronus because of Azkaban. My headcanon is that it was because he lost James - the light of his life.

Ignoring (1) I believe that if Sirius had been able to cast a Patronus after 1981, it would have been a stag and I even have a one-shot about that called: I can't love you back to life but I can live your love.

James and Sirius went to the 1974 Quidditch World Cup together with James' family. When Sirius opened his letter from Harry in the summer of 1994, which obviously did have some concerning news about Harry's scar hurting, he couldn't help but smile nonetheless at the hurriedly scribbled addition that Ron's family was taking Harry to see the World Cup.

Speaking of letters, Sirius re-read and re-read and re-read (...) Harry's letter where Harry provided a 'blow-by-blow account of exactly how he had swerved, circled and dodged the Horntail', all the while thinking back to the many occasions James would sit in the common room providing similar accounts of his own flying (which he didn't need to, Sirius had it all memorised already).

[headcanon-territory]

Lupin III movies/media and their respective side character/npc girl rating - excuse for rambling -⭐️

~order of when I watched it~

• The First : 10/10

>Sexy people movie

>still one of my biggest favorites

>This movie is strong with its characterization and interactions

>Everybody in this movie you guys have my phone number

>look I get it we have Sweet boy Lupin but girl you did not need to feel the need to save the nazi

>I kinda just skipped the scenes that are not involving lupgang I'm sorry Latitia

>why why are we now feeling bad for her nazi grandpa why why are we here

>the rating is perfect for the animation sorry guys

NPC girl: 7/10 - Latitia is fun when she's interacting with Lupgang she works well with them despite being so normal,, unless if it's her solo scenes especially with her grandfather

• Castle Of Cagliostro: 10/10

>peak lupin

>second movie so immediatly went from sexy people doing crimes to Hayao Miyazaki telling you to sit down and rethink life

>is there anything else to say cause many of video essays represents what j think of this movie

>STOP MILKING THIS MOVIE

>I got weirdly hyped when I realize that ending was the scene that Marisa stole that precious thing referenced

>I need more zenigata and lupin moments with how this movie does it

NPC girl: 9/10 - Clarisse is the prototype sure but the tone of this movie helps her stand in and not awkward with the cast most of the time

- I also feel emotions like I cared for this girl in comparison to Latitia

•Prison of the Past: 10/10

>I had a blast

>Zenigata and Yata are the best here sad that Yata's character didn't transition into part 6 apparently

>First introduction to Yata though that I seen clips of him in Part 5 prior

>cute robot heehee

>Harvey stardew valley why are you here

>Yata beating up lupin and going apeshit with no intentions to be will always be my favorite

>rewatched for comfort from nostradamus' Zenigata

NPC girl: B - Florensa was that her name?? Didn't care, that fighting scene was good tho

•Tokyo Crisis - 9/10

>Fun Movie

>Alot alot of Zenigata in this I'm happy

>we can excuse Goemon getting nerfed the shit he has to go through is funny

>Fun artstyle

NPC girl: 8/10 - what the fuck was the plot with the villain using her egg cells about I forgot

She slayed tho, casually has psychic powers that rocks

•Detective Conan vs Lupin III [the second one] - 5/10

>watch this one for the scenes with Jigen and Conan only

>I do not care about that idol boy and his manager what are you guys doing

>the fujiko bath scene with Ai is.. eugh../neg

>also this one is one of the movies with creepy lupin uh oh

No NPC girl but the crossover experience?: 4/10 get that idol boy OUTTA HERE

•Blood Seal ~ Eternal Maid: 9/10

>refreshing characterization after watching the Case Closed crossover oh my god

>Cute Fujilup in this

>Plot fun kinda died down when the little girl dropped the "I wanna be a thief" Plot for her sister

>still good tho nonetheless

>GRANDPA LUPIN DESIGN HERE WOAH??

>Especially its depicting a young Arsene Lupin and its funny on how sweet he is compared to our grandpap Lupin in Lupin Zero where he straight up ripped a woman's tooth

NPC girl: 9/10 what I mentioned earlier deducted a point but she is very fun in the first half of the movie I do care for her and her sister. Love all these little kids wanting to become Lupin

•Fuma Conspiracy: 9/10

>I need to rewatch this

>Was Goemon young when he met Murasaki in her young girl school uniform 😧..

>Weirdly I didn't feel like there was that much Goemon despite being a Goemon movie

>One of the best Fujiko Designs woah

>I don't care that it tries to replicate The cagliostro feel it was still a great movie

>the budget issues tho sheesh

NPC girl: 8/10 - Murasaki is cute I really don't mind;; after she got rescued it's like she dosent matter anymore but not in a bad way I do enjoy her company. Again with the change of tone she fits in [but I dont like the implication with her and Goemon from earlier]

•Farewell to Nostradamus: 10/10

>I love this movie fuck you

>I can excuse the absolute butchery they did to Zenigata because of how crazy this movie is

>still I need mental recuperation for that

>weirdly this and fuma are up on YouTube and these guys has good animation but why are they left up there??

>I do love this Lupin even though he's not that different from other movies but this specific version of Lupin is my fav

NPC girl: - 10/10 JULIA SOLOS I love her she dgaf most of the time either of how she has been under her parents protection and had fun after everything and she wants to be Lupin III?? EVEN SHE AND LUPIN ARE TRYING TO BUY A CANEO FOR SERGEO?? STOP THATS SO CUTE

-also she and Lupin gets along because of being kids born from rich families that wants freedom and fun

Bonus: Tagalog Dub

>This one is more funny than the sub but hey who loves themselves with pinoy humor

>Lupin gives Goemon and Jigen nicknames [Goemskis and Jigs] and i love it

>Lupin in my boiling blood is half Filipino with all my heart that i would die on this hill

>They removed the pedophile lines from Julia only because her first encounter with Lupin was changed from "You like little girls" to "You like dolls?" Probably for cultural reasons

>and other scenes calling Lupin a pedophile is changed to "The guy that looks like a monkey"

>Zenigata when he finally saw lupin after he's mistaken as dead added "Lupin, buhay ka pala, UNGOY KA!" ["Lupin you're actually alive you monkey!"]

>Lupin's first time seeing goemon "And lalaking sakam! Na walang hilig sa Chika babes!" [It's the Lonely/Greedy not interested to chicks and babes!"]

>Would it be funny if you decide watching the lupin tagalog dubs because you're a big Englishira

>I'm unironically calling Lupin by <Lu-Pin> not <Lu-Pon> because of this

•Green vs Red: 9.5/10

>Sometimes I'm watching a psychological horror movie

>and that thought came to mind when Green Lupin was panicking inside the car when red lupin came in

>and when Goemon couldn't handle that his friend's face is everywhere by people trying to impersonate him??

>and the "real" Lupin spying on everyone in the beginning sounding so depressed as he spies on zenigata??

>this shit was surreal I love it

>jigen was hot Grabbing on that helicopter wait whatt

>goemon tied up whaattt

>Serious sexy zenigata whattt

>this movie left me with emotions I think I'm supposed to rethink life

•Lupin III vs Cat's Eye: 8/10

>oh boy that artstyle is so limited to what it can do

>I have not watch Cat's Eye I didn't dig into any summary of Cat's Eye I immediatly jump in

>they cool tho

>I like Ai

>Lupin blowing a kiss to Zeni and Grabbing Jigen by the ass you kidding me

>Lupin gets injured so bad but not for drama intensity but to nerf him he's fucking blind for half the movie

>Goemon our mann he knew that burger hoe was badddd

>GOEMON YOUR SWORD

>YOU GUYS ARE INTIMIDATING A MAN IN THE PARIS CATACOMBS

>TWO MOVIES IN A ROW WITH THE NAZIS INTO THE PLOT

>Zhongli why are you talking to Lupin

>Lupin's voice is also low for majority of the scenes because of how tired he is.... stop the car,, I had to watch dub for the difference of Tony Oliver's performance

>It's alright but Kanichi's voice has some.. effect on me

>I need more lupin getting fucked up maybe I should go watch part 6 idgaf [I did]

>all of my screenshots of this movie is lupgang being very bloody and sexy

>crossover experience: 7/10 and I didn't got to be properly introduced with Cat's Eye

•Operation: Return the Treasure: 8.5/10

>A fun one

>Everybody really did shine here huh

>ESPECIALLY GOEMON WHO;

-ok the first minutes he's in already witness his benefactors murdered

-reunites with the gang and first thing done is trick him into giving back the treasure and get chased down after

-Gets arrested

-Got shot by the shoulder

-bleeding in an alleyway

-Got slammed by the door

-stabbed that crazy bitch clean despite that the blood was censored even though he wasn't censored also getting stabbed and shot?? Or is the zantutsken just like that

>Movie's a win when they have a good Fujiko

>Last act has pretty visuals

>shits gonna turn to the diamond castle from barbie

Npc girl: 2/10 why why are you can you exist nowhere we don't need a few shots of you admiring the scenery of that tower

Even the crazy bitch Is cooler than you

☆~Woohooo! I'm kinda new to Binge watching Lupin despite getting into the fandom 2 years back

Now last thing to note is that I'm scared facing the most harsher Lupin entries with the Lupin similar to Manga Lupin because the Lupin that was formed by Miyazaki in cagliostro then balancing him in movies like Nostradamus is my comfort,;,

[the-bloody-sadist]

Hi, it's been a while - I haven't looked at anything bsd related in a while (besides just reading the last chapter of the sinner epilogue) because it's not one of my current fixations, but I wondered if I could hear more from you about emotions? Recently my brain has been rotten by a love of computers and robots and maths and physics and I have been obsessively consuming all versions of I have no mouth and I must scream (have you heard of it? If not, ihnmaims is a short sci-fi story written by Harlan Ellison about an AI, AM, torturing the last 5 humans). The relationship between Ted and AM is fascinating to me, especially in terms of what 'emotions' AM feels towards him, and it reminded me of something that I think you wrote about how intertwined hate and love are - how hate is to care enough about a person to want their suffering and pain (I'm not entirely sure if that was you, forgive me if I'm wrong-). I'll spare you my ramblings about the story itself unless you are interested in hearing more, but I am very curious about your perspective on a being who was created for war, gained sentience and immense power and intelligence but will never be free, will never belong, will never play Mozart on the ivory keys of a fortepiano... a being who cannot feel in a way we can conceive but is driven by hatred, who craves humanity or release yet cannot die, who has no mouth but must scream.

There is a point where AM invades Ted's mind, ramming The Hate Monologue in the form of a steel pillar into his mind - some of the lines in this section make me go a little bit feral - "AM touched me in every way I had ever been touched, and devised new ways, at his leisure, there inside my mind."

It's incredibly intrusive, and for Ted there is no escape from AM - it's physical machinery covers the entire planet and the humans live within it, it's 'belly slaves'. As AM cannot die it keeps them alive, pretty much immortal (but not indestructible) and in the end, Ted too has no mouth though he must scream.

It's a fascinating mix of hatred, envy, deification, love (?), hope, resignation, invasion, co-dependence, wires and viscera that can never mix or understand each other but are the same in every way.

Apologies for the rambling infodump (especially if you have already read it/have absolutely no interest in this sort of thing - this isn't a rec, just my putrefied brain matter leaking into your ask box), I should really be asleep right now so I would not be surprised if this is entirely incomprehensible.... I just want to study them under an electron microscope.... It's a very grim story, with a powerful sense of the indomitable human spirit but very grim nonetheless. The hyperfixation is hyperfixating....

Anyway I should shut up, and I would love to hear your thoughts (I don't even know what I was intending this ask to be .. I can't remember now but I don't think it was .. this..) and thank you for putting up with this mess of a message- hope you have a lovely day/night!

- 🪼

P.S. oh yes! I loved the last chapter of sinner's epilogue- your writing never fails pluck my heartstrings like.. a very strange surgeon (?)(I'm so sorry I am very tired)(I have no brain and I must sleep...) I adore how you write Fyodor's experience of emotion and (as always) Dazai's fear and panic-

Okay listen, I don't plan to get into this story (I've watched essay videos on it so I do know about it, at least), but I respect how much time you took describing this to me in my asks box, so I'm putting it out for anyone else who might find it cool!

Despite my love for psychological trauma, some stories are a certain flavor that I know I shouldn't get into, and IHNMAIMS belongs in that category. Pretty sure if I read it it'll haunt me for the rest of my life and I'll have to deal with a big depressive episode over it for the weeks after, WHICH IS NEVER FUN.

This and other reasons are why I never read A Little Life, and then I learned that I dodged a bullet by putting the book down on the first instance of Jude's cutting episodes, BECAUSE OH MY GOD DUDE THAT STORY DID NOT HANDLE IT THE WAY I NEEDED IT TO BE HANDLED AND I COULD SMELL WHERE THE STORY WAS GONNA GO WITH IT AND TAPPED OUT. I won't get into the frustration of A Little Life but IHNMAIMS felt like it would be that same level of too much grim, not enough plot?? for me. Does that make sense? Too much bad happening just feels like dragging myself through mud without reason, making myself miserable by enduring hours of hurt-no-comfort LMAO

Regardless, thanks for talking to me about it! I knew most of the details of the story, but it was entertaining to read your description of it--I'm glad you find such interest in the story!

ALSO THANKS FOR THE COMPLIMENTS ON THE NEWEST SINNER EPILOGUE, I'M ACTUALLY WRITING YET ANOTHER ONE CURRENTLY...AHAHA....THEY NEVER STOP....we'll see how long it takes me since my writing has been out of touch with me for a while, but fingers crossed! <3