#according to

[superbeans89]

[tiffanyxvalentine]

I’m cute as hell

[starlooove]

Hate this vid I just saw

[littlepocketlove]

Hey guys! I might have autism and I’m fucking terrified!!!

[randomfoggytiger]

X-Files Collector’s Edition: A Happy Family (or Curated Baroness Blixen’s S9)

“According To” is a separate branch on the Collector’s Edition tree: instead of an author highlight, I want to construct an author’s (loose) timeline, set to my own personal chronological order. But feel free to read it this Inception-esque take-on-a-take-on-a-take however you want.   

(Note: These will be formatted differently, because this list is basically a Google Doc’s copy-paste; HOWEVER, I buffed it a bit so that it didn’t look crusty.) 

Baroness Blixen is one of the best at writing famfic, because her stories ring true (with the right touch of fluff and deep contemplation.) I cannot sing her praises enough, but I’ll stop so you can read for yourself. 

Here we go!

Post Existence-- Mulder watches Will sleep, and has never felt this content

Post Existence-- Mulder tells baby Will about how fell in love with Scully 

Post Existence-- Mulder pumped and contemplative over his new role. He feels ready to conquer the world; but Scully knows sleep is more important. 

Post Existence-- Maggie holds Will, and is amused at Papa Bear Mulder  

Post Existence-- Mulder feels useless as father. Scully assures him he’s a good father, accidents are accidents. “Love you to the moon and back.” 

Poor Mulder loses the grocery list and spirals in self-doubt. Little boy finds it for him. He still forgot eggs. 

ESTJ is back to work; but is scared, jealous that stay-at-home Mulder might get bored and leave. He assures her he’s happy. (Ao3)  

ESTJ finds Mulder and Will asleep on couch. She ends up joining them. 

Christmas Season-- Baby Will fascinated by ornaments. Mulder and Scully sing Silent Night to him; then all three fall asleep under tree. (Ao3) 

Christmas Eve-- 3AM, and Scully lets her nocturnal boys do their thing. (Ao3) 

Take Your Kid to Work Day; and Scully is content to show off her charming boys. (Ao3) 

Bait and switch about Mulder leaving: he’s afraid to leave Will and go back to work. Scully practical about all choices involved. 

Will crying on plane; Mulder figures out he wants to move. 

Will refuses to eat gross peas. Mulder is decorated until Scully returns. (Ao3)

Mulder and Scully’s moment is ruined again by bees. Will recovers, is fine. (Ao3)

ESTJ frightened by Will’s Flukeman toy, and Mulder is amused. 

Mulder’s Birthday-- He pretends to propose in his sleep; Scully shocked, amused. (Ao3) 

Mulder’s writing is interrupted by Will’s request to bake cookies. Flour accident. (Ao3) 

Will catches Mulder wrapping present; but is satisfied with his excuse.  (Ao3) 

Little Will wakes Mulder because “IT’S THE ALIEUMS.” Scully amused. (Ao3)

ESTJ has no energy, Will wants ice cream, and Mulder is sent home from nap mid conference. 

Will and Mulder fall asleep on couch waiting up for Scully.  (Ao3)

Will’s 1st day of school-- Mulder and Scully taking it hard. (Ao3) 

Mulder and Scully feel odd shopping without Will, but still have fun. 

Scully is at a conference, and Mulder tries to keep Will’s spirits up. 

Scully reassures anxious Will that Mulder won’t be in danger at new job. (Ao3) 

Mulder worn down from work and parenting. Maggie gives them break. (Ao3) 

Mulder touched by Will’s homemade card. 

Will is so proud to make a pie for Maggie. (Ao3) 

Will afraid he’ll miss Christmas morning. Mulder promises he won’t. (Ao3)

Scully amused Will learned wrong shoe-trying technique from watching Mulder. 

Will and Mulder play “the floor is lava.” Scully comes home to chaos. (Ao3) 

Skinner looking after Will, hopes he doesn’t follow his parents’ footsteps.  

Will and Mulder make, break, and fix gingerbread house. (Ao3) 

Will fear of Chupacabra turns to disgust when Scully debunks its reality. (Ao3)

Teenager Will is bummed out. Mulder brings donuts, guides him through Valentine Day’s worries.  (Ao3) 

We all need to a little fluff cardiac arrest from time to time-- join me. >:)

Enjoy! 

[toonstarterz]

I found out japanese fans are calling this the "american comic book-style marcille"

i'm WHEEZING LMAO

[vonlipvig]

WE NEED TO KILL HIM

[andrewpcannon]

Sips of Wisdom: Bathsheba’s Teaching on the Subject of Alcohol Consumption for Her Grandchildren in Proverbs 31:4-7

We remember that Proverbs is not a book about the Law. If we don’t take Solomon’s advice, we are not “in sin.” Solomon wants to share his wisdom with his children to show them that there is a good path and a path that leads to destruction in life. In the previous section, we learned that the dating scene, as it is popularly known, is on the path that leads to destruction. There is a better,…

[wrightandco]

the confetti for a not guilty verdict is actually the funniest fucking thing about ace attorney

it’s like they inherently know their system is fucked to the to the extent that they’ve got the celebration confetti at the ready when they don’t wrongfully incarcerate someone

edgeworth never lost a trial until he faced phoenix wright so the confetti goes off and he’s probably like what the fuck ppfthh pffth phhh that last bit is him spitting the confetti out of his mouth

[artkaninchenbau]

Crocodile finds a strange stray cat an 11-year old Nico Robin (AU where they met 13 years earlier. Robin's been on the run from the World Government for 3 years. Crocodile's 27 and has not set up base in Alabasta yet)

It seems like I have become possessed. By some sort of demon.

Bonus:

[minjimunji]

Obligatory battle of the labyrinth kiss scene

Bonus:

[mellifluousoctopus]

Not beating the allegations (<- idiot wore a black and burgundy outfit and played 2000s pop punk at work today)

[secretdazedragon]

his three mode

[gingerswagfreckles]

After 146 days, the Writer's Strike has ended with a resounding success. Throughout constant attempts by the studios to threaten, gaslight, and otherwise divide the WGA, union members stood strong and kept fast in their demands. The result is a historic win guaranteeing not only pay increases and residual guarantees, but some of the first serious restrictions on the use of AI in a major industry.

This win is going to have a ripple effect not only throughout Hollywood but in all industries threatened by AI and wage reduction. Studio executives tried to insist that job replacement through AI is inevitable and wage increases for staff members is not financially viable. By refusing to give in for almost five long months, the writer's showed all of the US and frankly the world that that isn't true.

Organizing works. Unions work. Collective bargaining how we bring about a better future for ourselves and the next generation, and the WGA proved that today. Congratulations, Writer's Guild of America. #WGAstrong!!!

[caputvulpinum]

yeah we might be brothers in christ but so were cain and abel so shut the fuck up before i decide to find a rock about it

[hotcinnamonsunset]

a whale of a good time🐋