#adolescence youth

[distantsonata]

[palehorsemen]

[dk-thrive]

Last night I dreamt that we were young again and loved each other fiercely with our bodies. It was in the midst of ruin even then, the roof collapsing in, dust and debris all around. Ah but we were fearless in the face of time.

— Moyra Donaldson, "Fearless" from her collection 'Carnivorous’ (Doire Press, January 1, 2019)

[moami]

I don't know where I'll be in five years, or in ten. I thought I could predict life if I only tried hard enough; if I pushed into the tracks of my chosen path with all the force of my body, muscles tightening in anticipated soreness, to force a cart without wheels along the road I wanted to take. In my mind, I told myself that certainty was possible if I aligned the stars and synchronised the planets myself, whatever it took.

There's no road. None of us have a cart, either.

I cried about that for a long time. There's nothing I wanted more than knowing that what I did was surely correct. That with mathematical precision, my idea of a flawless outcome was achievable and I could chip it out of marble day by day, even if I saw nothing in the white stone.

In the end, we all just walk through the forest. The road we think we see is where light touches, or flowers grow, or water flows between the moss. Whatever draws you in becomes a path.

I don't know. That used to scare me. It still does, sometimes, when a new thing lands in the forest with a meteor-impact or a leaf crumbles from my oak tree.

There's no road. There's no cart. I don't know.

I just walk here and admire the sights.

[sadexecutivelove]

the burden of a girl's teenage years

[somenteniki]

[vintage-tigre]

[arowrath]

Literally when marina said i wish i'd been i wish i'd been a teen teen idle wish i'd been a prom queen fighting for the title instead of being sixteen and burning up a bible feeling super super super suicidal. the wasted years the wasted youth the pretty lies the ugly truth and the day has come where i have died only to find ive come alive. i wanna be a virgin pure a twenty-first century whore i want back my virginity so i can feel infinity i wanna drink until i ache i wanna make a big mistake

[wotchergiorgia]

I spent the whole afternoon writing an essay on dostoevsky's a raw youth while listening to joni mitchell. I'm going insane.

[arcxnumvitae]

Labored breaths fell from the youth's lips, loud in the otherwise silent office from where he sat on the ground, his back pressed against the desk. Though he wasn't alone, at least by technicality. His sibling lay only paces away, their still body cooling as parts of their limbs had already begun to revert. Their eyes still stared at him, surprise and rage seemingly still present in their glassy stare. Their expression was otherwise still, smooth thanks to the paralytic he had slipped into their drink upon entering their office. The cause of death would be clear thanks to the knife jutting out from their abdomen. Daileas didn't much care whether the paralytic was discovered or not, or what story the Unseelie court would come up with. Gossip would compound upon itself, and with the current state of the court and the coup there were more pressing matters than to muster up an investigation into the murder and attempted murder of the Ròsach heirs, not when they were not even considered nobility to begin with.

With that thought forcing him back to present circumstances and the pain radiating in his body, Daileas grit his teeth and gripped at the knife currently stuck in his own abdomen, and shoved it further in. Despite himself, a pained moan ripping itself from him at the action. Damned knife. He had to be certain that no eyes would turn his way, and few would elect to willingly stab themselves as part of the ruse. Especially not with an iron knife, a detail of which Daileas was regretting. It was risky of course despite his best efforts to aim for a non-lethal spot, but he couldn't risk losing the Vault after all of his planning because of a bit of weakness.

The inheritance was his now. He would not be iced out, and he would not let anyone take it from him.

That resolution bolstering his resolve, Daileas steadied his grip on the knife. He had one more thing to do, which he was looking forward to the least. Taking a deep breath, the youth then twisted the knife and howled in pain. Silver blood coated his fingers and stars exploded across his vision. The coagulant he took helped stem the blood flow, and barring extraordinary circumstances he would not bleed out. That didn't mean it didn't hurt like a son of a bitch. But that should be enough, which was just good since dark spots now dances across his vision as they grew. He was losing consciousness, understandably. His last scream of pain should have been enough to draw attention in the household despite the late hour. Someone should arrive soon, at which point...he would receive aid...

And it was in the middle of planning his next steps that Daileas' eyes fluttered closed and he slumped over.

[triviallytrue]

aren't you tired? i'm tired.

[palehorsemen]

[darkgifted]

with each passing day i move arlis' maturity slider to the right and make her grosser in act 2

[camcorderrevival]

the whole concept of mels & amy mommydaughtergirlbestfriends is sooooo wonderfully horrific...it's a shame that entire storyline sucks balls

[vintagecase]

[vintage-tigre]