#akatzombie

[i-want-pho]

My Secret Santa exchange present for @akatzombie!! I noticed you really liked Witcher/Elder Scrolls Online type stuff a lot, so I went very loose and created the Dunmer bounty hunter Kakuzu and his warrior Nord partner, Hidan. I had so much fun making this, I really wanted to give you something you’d want to look at over and over.  @akatsuki-gift-exchange 

[edgy-senju]

Kakuzu... proteCC??? hidan?????

Yes, he does. Also, i bet he would find an excuse like "I do this because I don't want to waste my time stitching your pieces back together if you idiot get hurt"

[peepingtoad]

-pats him down looking for frogs-

impromptu asks || always accepting! || @akatzombie

Hasn't the foggiest idea what the husbando is looking for, and therefore just blinks dumbly.

“Uhh... if you're looking for my wallet, I ain't got one,” he says with a breezy shrug, and a grin that soon turns from dumbly oblivious to somewhat devious. 

“...Loose change's usually in the back pocket, by the way~”

Spoiler: there is no back pocket. Only ass.

[gladyzzia]

Hey just a reminder that you're rad

🥺🥺

[sharkfinx]

@akatzombie​ asked:

"I forget sometimes you're as strong as you are... and I don't mean physically."

                  “ Kakuzu-san...do you know that saying; Ignorance is a bliss? Some people would say that being strong is confronting the consequences of your actions, in spite of that’ What that would even help me? Overthink about decency in a ruthless world like ours? Nah, that’s too troublesome. Let’s accept the monster we are and that’s it. Easy, quickly and honest.” 

[iraprince]

Holy fuck. Fucking thank you for your "unclench your jaw" posts. You've saved me from relapsing onto two cluster headaches this week. Thank you. Fuck. Just. If I had the money I would hire you for 25$/hr to stand next to me and scream at me to stop clenching my jaw.

that’s my ideal job. i’d do that in a heartbeat as long as i’m allowed to like, stay on my phone the whole time. would love to scream all day for money

[zombie-honeymoon]

It's cold and character A keeps getting a runny nose and thinks they're catching a cold. Character B reluctantly takes care of character A.

Here you are! A kakuhida fic where Hidan tries his best to take care of a sick Kakuzu, I hope you enjoy! 

Chicken Soup 

[fxckhidan]

-throws Hidan over his shoulder like a sack of flour- we have a mission.

he’s not a morning mission kind of person

[ailuroscreations]

Also Hidan, C4, the first time he sees how hung Kakuzu is

[cayennecrush]

she loooove!! 💕

[maskage]

-musses his alreADY MESSY HAIR-

             it effectively forces Kakashi out of his brief slumber  ---  not that he wasn’t already awake upon Kakuzu’s approach. he had recognised the familiar coil of the other man’s chakra, deemed it non-hostile, and proceeded to feign sleep until Kakuzu dared to turn the mess of silver hair on his head into a downright disaster.

           “maa . . .  can’t a man nap in peace anywhere?��      Kakashi grouses with no real bite, one eye blinking open to stare blearily at Kakuzu. with the hand that isn’t pillowing his head, Kakashi runs gloved digits through his hair in an attempt to right it.       “is there something i can help you with?”

          /        @akatzombie

[edgy-senju]

Reminder that you are a BEAN and ilu

Thank you dear!! These words made my day ;^;💖💗

[peepingtoad]

@akatzombie​ said: "What have you gotten yourself into this time." | impromptu asks | always accepting! |

There were numerous acts from Jiraiya’s youth—ill-conceived, reckless and quite often under-the-influence acts—that had made him equally numerous enemies, and to such a point where it was nigh on impossible to keep count or even remember the whys and hows of them anymore.

Anyway, one would think that a transgression from what must be a good thirty years ago would be water under the bridge by now, wouldn’t they?

Well, apparently not. Apparently ‘the illicit de-flowering of soon-to-be-married nobility’ was an insult to the groom that could only be repaid in all of the philanderer’s assets, along with a lifetime of scorn and sneering and general unwelcomeness in this particular town.

As far as Jiraiya was concerned, of course, he ‘didn’t owe them shit’—to quote him directly—which would have been bad enough if he hadn’t also insinuated that he could rock the happily married noblewoman’s world even now, the two both comfortably in their fifties.

That was when it got... ugly. And of course, when the going got tough... the tough sent a toad to someone equally tough, but a whole lot more sensible.

When Kakuzu approached him with endless exasperation all bundled up into that one dry statement, Jiraiya laughed nervously, wispily.

“Ahahaha... okay. I’ll level with you.”

This was funny, because he was far from level with Kakuzu right now, what with him accepting his fate of being put in stocks for the rest of the day.

“Your answer is... debt. I’ve gotten myself into debt, okay? Or should I say, I’ve re-gotten myself more specifically into, uhh... into a position where I’m being demanded to pay reparations.”

Need he say any more? 

The plea for help was written in his features as plainly as the word ‘pig’ was written across his cheek. But this was what he got, he supposed, for letting his miserly husband have reign over his assets. Kakuzu could solve all his problems right now, or he could leave him to ruin and humiliation... or Jiraiya could break free and escape, thus making even worse enemies of this place... but that was besides the point.

He couldn’t very well punish him just for trying to make things right... right?

[gladyzzia]

reminder that you are precious and I adore you

I have no idea what brought this on-

But thank you

[hiramekxrei]

-softly- Kakuzu in A3?

Blushy Meme (* >ω || @akatzombie

who did this??? he’s old, he’s going to burst something!!!

[tendermiasma]

akatzombie

replied to your photo

“Movers came today and now this weird, empty hovel is mine until June ��...”

-chants- show us your pet. Show us your pet.

His name is Sampson aka Sam-Sam aka SaaaaAAaaam aka Fine Gentleman aka Handsome Mans aka Damn Vagrant aka Tax Collector aka Nasty Ass and you’d have to pay me not to show you pictures of him

The last one was from this weekend, as you can see, he helps pack. He was my great-grandmother’s cat who I inherited, so he’s kind of a family heirloom :’) Loves hamming it up for anyone and everyone, wants you to play this adorable hybrid of tag and hide-and-seek with him all day if you let him. My older cat, Tux, passed away last year and I’d love for Sam to have another buddy sometime, so we’ll see. He’ll have a wonderful little patio space down in Austin for lounging out in the sun. Definitely not as excited for him to enjoy the new place as I am because that would be really weird.