#all queer ppl know each other and we will run into everyone at some point even if we are half way across the world

[eraserhappy]

OFMD is so queer that you have 2 exes who never actually dated separated by a whole freaking sea, but manage to end up at the same bar(?) and everyone knows each other (and have probably hooked up) but had no idea THIS was the person you were crying about.

[userkoo]

this site is so sensitive when i mention tae and jk together. like i even saw a tiktok naming their fav pairings and for everyone it was fine but when it was taekook they had to disclaim it was (pLaToNiC) was that not implied by the rest of your list?? ppl are so scared to mention them at all but if he's with another member its fine. its annoying and ppl are so transparent

i actually don't think tumblr is a primary suspect among the list of platforms where people move weird about taekook,.. but i'm speaking as someone in a little bubble of mutuals who are normal people lol. i also have never ventured onto the hellscape that is the bts stan side of tiktok so i can't speak on that either (besides seeing screenshots of people on there calling normal behaviors from jungkook 'red flags'... oof.) most of the bullshit, in my experience, stems from twitter where, like you said, even a simple mention of them hanging out together can end up with people accusing you of being a 'shipper' or a 'diet solo.'

this is going to be rambly so i'm putting it under a read more for the sake of not clogging people's dashes, but here are some of my thoughts on fandom culture/shipping in general:

oh real quick for for transparency sake, i'll start this off by saying: 1. i don't care about the relationship status of any of the bts members. they're single to me unless they officially and publicly state otherwise without any privacy invading force involved. 2. i have no problem with fans thinking/implying bts members are queer. lgbt fans finding comfort and comradery in their favorite people isn't a bad thing. :)

now for the actual post~

the fan dynamics on twt are so different and if you even mention taehyung and jungkook in the same sentence or say that they're very obviously close friends, you might end up on some of those 'defend [insert member here]' accounts where they encourage people to block and report for the slightest of 'offenses.' and like you mentioned in your post, that's over people talking about them platonically!! or over people who simply read fic without ever insinuating they think they're actually dating.

the puritanical culture that exists in very large parts of the bts fandom (and was present in the 1d fandom as well) is so weird to witness. we can all have differing opinions on whether or not rpf is 'good' or not, but unless someone is sending fanfiction to bts personally... it is harmless. and it will always exist. you will never enter into a fan space where independent, 'non-canon' content isn't being created by fans... and why would you want to? so much of fandom culture and history is about creation (and is also super lgbt centric!!)

in my opinion, the only people who still get up in arms about shipping discourse in 2023 are those under 18 or those who have no previous fandom experience. after stanning harry styles since 2012, i have heard the 'gay rumors made them drift apart!!!' argument so many times that it is genuinely nausea inducing. (and my opinion on that is... if you are that turned off by people possibly thinking you're queer to the point where it makes you end an important friendship, you either weren't very close to begin with or you're homophobic. likely a combination of the two. gay rumors are not, and never will be, offensive. they are not something you need to protect your fave from. why is this the argument so often touted by fans? why would you WANT your favorite person's self image to be so fragile that they end friendships over rumors? and that's not even getting into the fact that skinship and performance is built into the literal DNA - lol - of kpop...)

like. maybe i'm just too old to care now but i genuinely could not give less of a fuck if people think jk and taehyung are in a relationship. i do not care. they're both beautiful people who are clearly fond of each other. do any of us know how deep that fondness runs? nope! and we never will! and that's more than okay because these are grown men with personal, private relationships that we will never be privy to... as it should be. as long as boundaries are respected, i don't care what people think to be true.

can shippers get overzealous? for sure. do the people who analyze their every move need a new hobby? most definitely. but i think it's more than obvious now that the people who go to insane lengths to invade their privacy are stalkers or people trying to dredge up dating rumors between them and women.

it gets especially transparent when you have videos and rumors online about bts members dating people they've never interacted with publicly (using 'liskook' as an example, there are youtube videos with 10million views about them. one posted ten hours ago has 52k views) but i never see them condemned with the level of vitriol i see people using when it comes to jk and taehyung. is that not weird?

idk man. there's no concise ending to this post. fandom culture just intrigues me which is why i have so much to say about all this. it's especially interesting to me how it intersects with queer culture - or directly opposes it.

[palms-upturned]

Uhhhh ur misogynistic gay man whose name I can’t remember for that character ask meme

DJSTEJDH HELP… saionji…

character ask meme

What I love about them

love is a strong word when it comes to saionji 💀 but ill admit i enjoy watching his clownery djsgdjxb in the end i found him p compelling, i think the way the show handles both his and touga’s positions as simultaneous victims and perpetuators of the system is rlly interesting… something something about how oftentimes we cling to systems that actively harm us because they also give us some degree of power over others and tempt us w the promise of even more 😔 err anyway, the point is i love that saionji’s queerness and legitimate struggles that come w that don’t exempt him from being taken to task for the ways he abuses what privileges he has, also it’s very funny to watch him get owned 💙 that being said tho i do get like 😔 over his part in the final duel… oh god oh fuck saionji we’re really in it now

What I hate about them

what’s not to hate about this guy… every time he even exists in the same space as anthy i want to rip him limb from limb… but in all seriousness i think the most damning thing about saionji is that he proves that he’s perfectly capable of understanding the abusive dynamic between akio and his victims and even goes to weirdly touching lengths to forgive touga and help him escape, and yet he does not extend any of that kindness or effort toward anthy and actively heaps on more abuse… i do appreciate that a lot about the show, portraying abusers not necessarily as like fundamentally evil people™️ who are somehow different from everyone else and easily identifiable, but people who make the active choice to leverage their power over others, whatever the circumstances may be 😔

Favorite moment/quote

im obsessed with the entire verdant hopes light novel like it’s maybe the funniest thing ive ever read, there’s a scene where saionji runs into wakaba at a department store and drops a bottle of salad oil, which he then asks a store clerk to wrap in a pretty bow bc it’s a gift for a girl, and wakaba is like WHAT. and saionji is genuinely shocked that she thinks it’s a stupid present. second funniest moment is when touga comes to talk to him at the dojo and says “i came to invite you on a date” and saionji pauses before tentatively saying, “me? 😳” and touga is like “haha a double date, i mean. don’t get me wrong, i don’t swing that way” and the narrator is like “this was obviously a lie but saionji didn’t need to know that” LIKE. GOD DHXGSJXBXBC

What I would like to see more focus on

im haunted over saionji being literally homeless after he gets expelled, like… “i have no family or friends to turn to” WHAT? the friends part i can believe but dhgsjdbxbx what?!!?? i just think it’s kind of hilarious that we know a little about each of the stuco members’ families but nothing about saionji’s even tho he seems to be in the most dire situation of them all 😭 but maybe what he meant was that he got disowned after his expulsion… who knows… legit hysterical that no one cared enough to explain that plot beat

What I would like to see less focus on

🤔🤔🤔 again i have no answer for this, i think his storyline was fine

Favorite pairing with

im not immune to tousai… in spite of [gestures broadly]… explaining why would get a little too personal ksbsjdnxbc but let’s say unfortunately i relate to some issues between those two

Favorite friendship

i think it’s p funny that nanami calls him kyouichi, i like to think she bossed him around mercilessly when they were kids

NOTP

errr idk, do ppl really ship him with anthy or wakaba? i hope not 😭

Favorite headcanon

hmmmm… well for some reason when i picture him and nanami as kids i always imagine her just fucking biting him when she gets mad KSSHSGDH so ig just that nanami put the fear of teething toddlers in him

[save-the-spiral]

PLS PLS LIST THE SWAPS!! TELL ME ABOUT THE SIBLINGS AND ALSO HIFUMI BECAUSE I LOVE HIM (IF YOU WANT!) I will also send more questions in the morning too, excited to see what you’ve been working on!!

OK OK OK !!!!! AHH! So, before assigning talents, I swapped the pools, so for the first game, I use the talents from the second game, and vis versa! For some i listed gender, sexuality, or neurodivergencies, though this isn’t all of them, and I haven’t developed them all to the same level!

This is SO long. I didn’t even bother mentioning things like my plans for the killing games. (I have DR1 planned out in full, but only parts of DR2 and the v3 anime)

THANK YOU FOR THE ASK MY HEART SKIPPED A BEAT IN HAPPINESS WHEN I SAW I HAD NEW ASK NOTIFS!!

LIST:

Trigger Happy Havoc (first game)

Kyoko Kirigiri- Ultimate Luckster- Mastermind (: Sometimes lesbians can be evil okay! was trained as a detective like everyone in her family and didn’t get the ultimate :) she’s definitely not mad about that :) her luck cycle depends on how far she plans things ahead. her good luck is when she’s spontaneous! She hates when ‘normal’ people are accepted by ultimates.

Makoto Naegi- Photographer (Mostly wildlife and nature photography, with Sayaka helping him for some animal photography (: trans and bi <3 One of sayaka’s birds nests in his hair like all the time)

Kiyotaka Ishimaru- Ultimate Swordsman (AUTISTIC ICON, has trained in kendo since he was a kid, then was essentially given away to the Fujisaki clan by his very stressed dad. Semiverbal, rarely speaks.)

Chihiro Fujisaki- Ultimate Yakuza (Taka is her bodyguard! His family is in debt to hers, the Fujisaki clan is the most powerful in Japan. trans icon, of course, dates Sayaka! Very direct, though she’s far more delicate and polite when talking to taka, her best friend)

Sakura Oogami- Ultimate Nurse (Works as an EMT- her clan still is in martial arts, so she’s still very buff, she assists in injuries at the family dojo. Autistic Icon)

Asahina Aoi- Ultimate Gamer (ULTIMATE ADHD. streams and has a ton of fun, will ramble while breaking records, demigirl who loves her girlfriend sakura :)

Mukuro Ikusaba- Ultimate Chef (Works best with ‘cheap’ food, and making them taste good. a byproduct of growing up on the streets with junko, and junko being bored of the same old food they dug out of the trash. now works closely with junko for her teams’ nutritional needs! autistic and sapphic.)

Junko Enoshima- Ultimate Team Manager (there are SO many sports she can never get bored, and the professional scene is always changing! prefers coaching womens’ teams, because being an ultimate brings them more publicity and usually higher pay :)

Mondo Oowada- Ultimate Prince (OH MY BOY. trans adhd icon. now the crown prince of Novoselic, with a reagent in his place until he comes of age. His service dog Chuck is a maltese and an absolute sweetheart. Chihiro takes him under her wing to teach leadership. also dates taka later OF COURSE, though they’re poly and I may add more ppl to their relationship later.)

Celestia Ludenburg- Ultimate Musician (specializes in violin, most strings, though she can play any instrument. grew up poor, dedicated herself to an instrument and persona to cope)

Byakuya Togami- Ultimate Musician (Yep. two musicians. two catty trans gay icons about to throw down. they HATE each other and grew up as rivals. specialize in classical, they literally tore a professional orchestra full of grown adults apart trying to make them side with who was the best musician. they’re so good that they’re matched, and Hope’s Peak accepts them as one student and combined ultimate. they room together. they fight. Literally if one of them gets expelled, the other does too, so they’re STUCK. eventually they become literally inseparable and insufferable together like the WORST siblings. I love them.)

Sayaka Maizono- Breeder (animal handler) (Specializes in birds!!!!!! has songbirds on her shoulders all the time. will give unsettling animal facts without realizing they’re unsettling. sends her songbirds to serenade chihiro when they start dating <3)

Yasuhiro Hagakure- Gymnast (you see this tall goof who acts like an older brother to everyone and wonder HOW he’s a gymnast. he’s completely different in competitions, though still lighthearted. becomes a big brother figure to mukuro and junko especially <3 also trans bc i say so.)

Leon Kuwata- Traditional Dancer (he just. kinda hates it. it takes SO much work and effort but he takes to it naturally. his cousin kanon is NOT like in canon, instead she’s helpful. he’d literally rather be doing anything else. doesn’t know how to do anything like... basic either. can’t cook. cant do his own laundry. everything was dedicated to traditional japanese dancing before he attended HPA.)

Toko Fukawa- Engineer (writes schematics and is very good at it. gets VERY upset when her plans go wrong. her notes are orderly and perfect. host for their system!)

Syo- Mechanic (a factive of genocider syo, NOT an actual killer. she’s a protector mainly, and also is more adept at hands on skills when it comes to fixing things, her hands are less shaky. Her notes are a disaster and she does it to spite Toko.)

Hifumi Yamada- (???) (reserve course) Protagonist! My BOY. HIFUMI IS GOOD OKAY. He’s autistic and loves anime and gaming! he’s not particularly ultimate-leveled at them, or anything else! Attending Hope’s Peak as a reserve course student! At one point he joins the student council as a reserve course representative even if he’s only a freshman :) He’s also a moderator in Hina’s livestream chat, under the username of JusticeHammer, fastest ban hammer this side of the internet. He's internet friends with hina and sakura, and doesn’t realize Oh We Go To the same SCHOOL until he bumps into them. and realizes hina doesnt know what he looks like. but sakura does. its hilarious. he’s aroace, and during the year they’re locked in HPA, is in a queer platonic partnership with Hina and Sakura, while they’re dating each other. it’s great.)

Goodbye Despair! (second game)

Peko Pekoyama- Lucky student (ohohoh. her luck relies on her conviction. if she has doubts her bad luck strikes HARD. trans!, was taken in by Fuyuhiko’s family when she was a baby, grew up as just another kid in the family. They all expected Fuyu to go off to HPA on his own and then BOOM acceptance letter)

Fuyuhiko Kuzuryu- Programmer (He. gets so angry while coding. He has an array of rubber ducks to talk to and work through his coding issues with. trans of course. Very protective of Peko when people say she doesn’t have a ‘real’ ultimate. ADHD and Autistic)

Sonia Nevermind- Writer (Literary Girl) (Her family immigrated to Japan when she was young! She writes a lot of serial killer novels, murder mysteries and horror and all that! Trans and bi :)

Gundham Tanaka- Detective (YEAH my guy is a detective. still talks Like That. Trans and bi and he and Sonia were kinda-dating (t4t autistic power couple in the making) when things started happening. He spends some time with his cool older sister who he looks up to a LOT. He and Sonia talk through things together a lot, they both have those red string walls, one for murder cases, another for a fictional plot lmao.)

Mahiru Koizumi- Moral Compass (my GIRL. autistic. Her morals rely a lot on people taking responsibility and being reliable, and she ends up having to work through some biases she didn’t realize she had when she arrived at HPA. Is still protective of Hiyoko, though that protectiveness is spread a bit thinner to extend to the rest of the class.)

Hiyoko Saionji- Clairvoyant!!! (HI YES I COULD TALK ABOUT HER FOR DAYS. Has actual visions in dreams and when she suddenly faints, but doesn’t really realize they’re uhh Real Visions for a WHILE. uses her status as an ultimate clairvoyant to trick and bully kids when in school for a LONG time, though her homelife wasn’t great with her grandmother trying to find ways to make her visions more consistent. SHES ALSO 12 WHEN SHE JOINS THE 77TH CLASS. she’s just so advanced in academics and her ultimate is so interesting hope’s peak cant HELP but scout her early. she has SO many issues guys no one appreciates hiyoko enough, autistic gifted kid hiyoko my beloved.)

Akane Owari- Gambler (started gambling to help out her family and Got Good at it. is very very conscious of money and food like all the time. Runs the hope’s peak betting pools once she arrives. these ultimates bet on a lot of things. she ALWAYS wins. until she doesnt!!!)

Mikan Tsumiki- Martial Artist (ohhhh Mikan. Still anxious and clumsy (though not like THAT in canon) and literally no one looks at her and thinks Oh The ULTIMATE martial artist?? it isn’t until you see her in the ring that you understand. She started learning self defense as a kid because her (bad) parents essentially said she had to rely on and protect herself and no one else would help.)

Kazuichi Souda- Pop Idol (OH TRANS ICON? he’s nervous and paranoid about Everything still, though now it’s like. oh the entire world is always watching my every move this is Okay (: has the brightest neon album eras. he literally keeps up a like. weird chad persona when interacting with people because he’s masking how hard he’s constantly just internally screaming.)

Nagito Komaeda- Soldier (AHAHAH my mans got issues problems disorder he’s a messssss, this trans guy, this absolute gay. this boy leveled a city of thousands of people with his own hands and some bombs. Still has medical issues, but most of his like. treatments and medicine is hold hostage as long as he stays in line. believes the ends justify the means and anyone who dies to him is obviously weak, because look at him! he’s weak, but that doesn’t matter because he doesn’t have to be the strongest, he just has to be stronger than the weakest scum.)

Chiaki Nanami- Heir (OOF. Agender, uses any pronouns. Doesn’t really. enjoy being the heir. grew up with Byakuya in the same circles. she treats the economy and stock market and stuff like games. enjoys gaming but isn’t good at them. collects so many things. has halls full of collections. Her parents stopped controlling her once she was able to prove she had more money than them and could literally bankrupt them if she wanted.)

Hajime Hinata- Baseball Star (Chiaki’s best friend, his family was upper middle class until he hit it BIG as a baseball star. wants to do BIG things and wants to attend hope’s peak more than anything!! Doesn’t really think of baseball as his THING, just a means to an end! trans :)

Teruteru Hanamura- Biker Gang Leader (started with shaking down some jerks who didn’t pay their food and drink tabs at his mama’s restaurant. now he RUNS their tiny town. His siblings are essentially gang mascots, he works hard to keep them out of trouble (while bringing them to like. meetings where he ends up beating a dude almost to death. its fine). most of what he does it to get more money to keep the restaurant afloat and care for his mama with her health conditions.)

Nekomaru Nidai- Fashionista (the drama. the CHAOS. most people are like ohhh we can never understand this artistic genius when he’s literally just. vibing and has ADHD and a love for coffee. Works a lot on accessible clothing lines for disabled people! Also he and Kazuichi work together sometimes, Nekomaru is good at calming Kaz down and seeing like, the root of whatever problem and making it better. ALSO A TRANS ICON and just flaunts it.)

Imposter- In the hope’s peak days they are impersonating Ryota Mitarai, as a part of the 77th class. In the Killing Game they impersonate Mondo Oowada as the Ultimate Prince. They’re doin’ their best.

Ibuki Mioda- (???) (Izuru Kamakura) Protagonist! Gundham Tanaka’s older sister (though they’re in the same school year). Nonbinary and using just. an array of pronouns alongside she/her, and jokingly fights with gundham for neopronouns like MOM said it’s MY TURN on the rawrself pronouns. She attends the reserve course to stay at her brother’s side. She dresses loudly and acts even louder because !!! she wants to stand out!! in the middle of this drab reserve course hell!!  but when things go down, she wants to be someone, to be worthy of being her amazing brother’s big sister. so she accepts some offers.

NON-KILLING GAME:

Ryota Mitarai- Ultimate Analyst (stays in his room. He’s terrified of the outside world but fascinated by it. watches hope’s peak academy through security feeds, picking up on little details. he just wants to understand things but never looks at the big picture.)

Chisa Yukizome- Ultimate Boxer (Homeroom teacher!! She’s working really hard and believes in everyone! Some are intimidated by talent, but she’s never hurt anyone outside of the ring! Dating Kyosuke)

Juzo Sakakura- Ultimate Student Council President (Has anger issues, though his work at reigning them in assisted in becoming an Ultimate. Was responsible for security and the Hope’s Peak student council. Dating Kyosuke)

Kyosuke Munakata- Ultimate Housekeeper (Meticulous, works himself to the BONE even if he’s good enough to not have to do that. Is working on establishing another Hope’s Peak! Dating Chisa and Jozu!!!)

Seiko Kimura- Ultimate Blacksmith (GIVE MY GIRL KNIVES!! She’s an anxious gal, always wearing a facemask that filters the air in her forge because she has some respiratory problems. she prefers making more decorative pieces like an artist, but sometimes can create utilitarian pieces or tools to fit specific needs. Still a doormat)

Ruruka Ando- Ultimate Pharmacist (She constantly asks Seiko for new tools for her developments in medicine, saying its all for the advancement of humanity, so Seiko denying any request is SELFISH, though she never thinks to make anything for seiko’s health issues. Dating Izayoi. Specializes in medicine for mental health. Not Doing Great :)

Sonosuke Izayoi- Ultimate Confectioner (He loves sweets. LOVES them. Creates things that look plain, ordinary. but taste so GOOD you CRY and maybe ascend for a little bit. sometimes Ando makes cool new drugs to put in the sweets, who knows! It’s a mystery! He always has like. a huge refrigerated case of fresh cakes, and constantly has a lollipop in his own specialty recipe in his mouth.)

[harristops]

I’m sure people are gonna attack me for this because I’ve followed your blog for a while and people seem to be more defensive of Ashlyn than Ali here but I’m curious…what are your thoughts on the fact that it seems Ashlyn was the one who used to post all the family/relationship type posts bragging about AK before they were even out as if to make sure ppl knew about it but now that they’re open and AK is open she’s the one doing it all and Ash barely does?? It’s a little odd to me

I think this was brought up before and people get into it all the time, but honestly my response remains the same: the wives don't owe us anything and if they choose to share anything, we should be grateful for it. Keep in mind, when Ash used to post stuff (and it still happens), internet trolls came after her with rabid vitriol. From homophobic comments to just plain sadism, people find anything to hate on her with and I think that she would post about AK before they were out because she wanted to prove a point that no matter what people said, AK was hers and that the trolls should back off.

But now that they're out and proud, that's no longer needed. People are no longer denying their relationship so she doesn't need to post about AK like that anymore. Plus, I think that when she did post about AK before they were out, the heat rarely went to AK but it went to her - so maybe from a protection perspective she would rather the negativity come to her than AK who was not comfortable at the time for being out. I don't want to read too much into that, though, because I have no idea what Ash's intentions were when she posted.

I think the big part of it though, is that AK never got to brag or post before, and I think Ash really wants her to have that space to be a happy, openly gay woman with her family. Remember, Ash was making these comments and posts when homophobia was much more prominent on the internet. Ash never publicly came out, but it didn't take much for someone to realize she's gay. She lived her life freely and was definitely more "queer looking" than AK, therefore there wasn't much to hide on her end (and making her an easy target for homophobes and haters). It's not that AK was hiding herself, but she definitely passed as a straight woman and therefore didn't invite as many comments about being a "d*ke" or anything. But now the world is a bit more open about queer people, so there's room for AK to express herself like non-queer people and be able to enjoy and bask in the beauty of her identity and relationship to Ash.

It should also be noted that AK doesn't get the same amount of heat when it comes to social media, so she doesn't run the risk of negativity on her posts. Anytime Ash posts, there's at least a handful of people spewing hatred, so why would she invite that onto a post about the ones she holds dear to her heart? She strikes me as a very protective person, and I think that's why she really hesitates from posting actual posts rather than just adding to her IG story.

It's kind of sad when you think about it, because even if Ash wanted to do sentimental family posts like AK does, she probably knows that it would just invite negativity. It was like that vid she posted of Sloane being changed while they were watching the SBC, and everyone came at her on twitter for being a ch*ld m*l*st*r, even if there was no nudity involved. Sloane is a minor, and people are sketchy af. She probably wants to keep all that out of Sloane's life if she can - but it's hard not to because even now, whenever she does an ad with Sloane in it, you'll have some twats saying she's exploiting her child for profit and it's race-based (but oddly enough, this comment doesn't happen much with AK or Syd or Alex Morgan or any of the other moms??).

In summation, Ash is probably just soaking every single minute in and taking a break from SM to enjoy her family. AK wants to shout her love for her family from the world, and she deserves to do so. Either way, we know only < 5% of their lives. They love each other to the ends of the earth and what they post doesn't change that.

[des-draws]

it's officially July but I'm still on pride mode!!! can't stop won't stop

Here are my lgbt+/queer hcs for class 1(g)A(y)!!! Here's what they are in case you don't recognize all of the flags (bc let's be real before I started coloring this I wouldn't recognize at least a few of them either ;^; ), strap in bc it's going to get l o n g:

(also they’re listed in the order they’re shown in the deviantart post rather than this one oop)

- Ojiro is trans!! I feel like he prefers being stealth but still celebrates with all his classmates because it's such a special occasion :') - Tooru is pan and a demigirl!!! It's her first pride and she's hyped!!!! And full of love!!!!! Love Is Stored In The Tooru!!! - Todoroki is a gay demiboy!! His trauma has made his experience with gender rather vague and blurry but he's still happy to have a label to somehow describe himself!! He's using End*vor's credit card to buy all of his friends pride merch!! - Midoriya is bi and trans!! He's been so happy to see his friends discover themselves and even more so to see them celebrating :') - Iida is bi!! As the second of the three members of the Rich Kids Club, he also wants to support and reaffirm his friends by buying them pride stuff!! - Kirishima is gay and trans!! I hc that he's been basically the class' go-to for gender identity/sexuality stuff bc he's been out-and-proud since Day 1 until pretty much everyone had a big coming-out ("I'm gay!" "Cool! I think I might be bi! :0c" "I...might...not be a girl???" "I'm pretty sure I'm [ace/genderfluid/etc.]" "What's that?" "Oh, it's [...]" "...might have to look into that. I think it might fit me too?" " :'D !!!!! " ) (he probably cried bc he was so proud of everyone) and then things calmed down a bit . He's a tinsy bit sad ppl no longer come to him for it but he pushes it down because he's just so!!!!!! happy to be surrounded by so many ppl like him!! - Bakugou is gay, trans and demisexual!! The last part was the hardest for him to figure out and he spent a lot of time being confused at other people, it was when Sero shared his own orientations that he thought maybe he wasn't as alone as he had thought :') - Uraraka is bi!! She's spent years thinking her crushes on girls were just her being jealous/wanting to be friends with them/not as important/stong as the crushes she's had on boys. She's getting over that internalized stuff now and I'm proud of her!! - Tsuyu is a trans girl and a lesbian!! She's been very open about wanting people to call her "Tsuyu-chan" because she chose that name herself!! And she's so happy that everyone here is supportive of her and each other!! - Yaomomo is also a lesbian!! This is her first pride, she's so excited to see all these people with different identities and experiences come together, and while she could easily create pride merch herself she much rather prefers supporing the indepentent LGBT+/Queer creators selling their own! (Hence why she bought two different variations of the lesbian flag for both her and Jirou!) (and probably many more of the stuff you see everyone wearing lol) - (Speaking of,) Jirou is also also a lesbian and also nonbinary!! Her only connection to girlhood is her love for other girls, but other than maybe updating her wardrobe a little she doesn't mind presenting femininely. - Sero is asexual, demiromantic and genderflux!! He's v. chill about everything, he probably found out and was like "Oh. Ok cool. I'm hungy" like he has a very laid-back attitude abt his identity/orientation but he Will defend his friends' to hell and back. Group mom heck yea - Kaminari is bi and nonbinary!! He was scared shitless to the point of losing sleep when he started figuring out that he miiiight like boys too, and even more so when he realised he might not even be a boy?? Thankfully being surrounded by so many supportive people (and having Kirishima as one of his closest and more trustworthy friends) helped him accept himself :') - Mina is pan and trans!! She's always been very open about being a Romantic™ but rather than being the Disaster Pan that gets flustered around everyone, she's the Disaster Pan that flirts shamelessly using Terrible pick up lines ("If we were dating...heh.....let's just say horses wouldn't be called horses anymore ;) " was the first ever thing she said to Kirishima, which earned her an extremely confused and somewhat flustered "I'm????ga y???? ???????" (it was the first time he'd admitted it out loud so he kinda thanks her for that) ) - Tokoyami is bi and trans!! A while back I read a fic that happened to have trans Tokoyami in it and was like "You know what. Yeah I can see it!" Emo culture is probably what helped him realize, with it playing around with and disregarding gender stereotypes and everything. - Aoyama is transmasculine, genderfluid and aromantic!! For the longest time he'd much rather have people mistake him for a feminine/gnc boy rather than a girl. It took him a while to come to terms with his aromanticism, since pretty much everyone expected him to be gay- he kinda expected it himself too, since he never liked girls that way, so?? But when he found out about the term "aromantic" it was like a weight lift off his shoulders. - Shoji is netrois and androsexual!! He knew he liked boys early but he's avoided dealing with figuring out his gender out of fear that he'd be disappointed- he's only ever seen nonbinary/genderqueer people depicted as androgynous and much smaller in stature than himself, so he thought he'd never fit. Seeing everyone else come out (especially the other nonbinary classmates of his), he stopped hesitating and starting working on coming to terms with himself!! - Satou is asexual and panromantic!! I don't really have much reasoning for this, I never really thought about it (or Satou himself) but when the time came to draw this I was like "Satou likes baking.....and puns are ace culture......FOOD PUNS!!! OF COURSE!!!" I'm sorry glkjhklhfdlkhj; - Koda is a trans boy!! He's had trouble recognizing it at the start because he's always been soft-spoken (almost nonverbal) and timid and kind, and """"those aren't traits of a boy""""" but he was so happy when he hit puberty and started growing So Much in stature due to his genes and people started "mistaking" him for a boy!! He came out to his parents almost immediately bc compassion and kindness seems to run in the family and he knew he'd be accepted even if they didn't completely understand!! He was more scared to come out to his classmates but when two, three, four of them come out and are accepted for being trans boys, he knows he'll be safe with them too. - And finally, last but not least, Aizawa is gay and trans!! He might act somewhat aloof about this stuff, but secretly he's very happy that his kids students all have eachother's support, and most of them their families'. Part of him is a little bitter and wishes he had the same kind of support system in their age, but he's going to be there for them if they need him nonetheless. He has his own support system now, and that matters a lot, too.

But wait!! There's M O R E !!!!! - I always love love LOVE how fanartists/editors give some of the characters more animal-like features, so I did that too!!! I went Full-on-Frog with Tsuyu (and I'm rather proud of how she came out (lol) ), but also I gave Mina some Sharp Chompers and a Fluffy lil' tail bc It's What She Deserves, and Ojiro a lil' toof poking out and ears that sharpen a lil bit at the tips? I hc that as he grows, other than his tail he'll start growing more animal features like that- sharper teeth, longer ears, claws and also, get ready.....pawbeans........the last ones give him Heck when they start growing out, and he needs his palms massaged at least once a day while they do :'( His legs get weird too and they end up looking more like a wolf's back legs :0c - I gave a lot of them freckles!!!! bc I Love Freckles!!!!!! also, as my sister very eloquently pointed out, I gave Uraraka "A R M S,,,,," bc. let's be honest. the girl got martial training she's not a twig - Sero is holding the polyamorous flag behind himself, Kaminari and Mina bc.. u guessed it,, they're all dating each other,,,,, lotsa smooches and cuddling and shenanigans bc there's only maybe one(1) braincell between the three of them and most of the time sero has it - Todoroki, Midoriya, Iida, Kirishima, Bakugou, Tsuyu, Yaomomo, Koda and Aizawa are also autistic. Yes all of them. No I won't explain. (unless you ask in good faith and want to share your own hcs pls ask me then I'll explain everything and you can expect it to be as long as this description!!!!!) (I might draw something about it when it's April again maybe *thinking emoji* ) - Oh!!! and Tooru, Kaminari and Mina are ADHD. Kirishima is also dyslexic. - Bakugou has been losing his hearing ever since he entered U.A.- sure he's always used his quirk but never freely to that extend and with so much power behind it, so getting into fight after fight with such close proximity to explosions that big really did a number on his ears. He can hear a little better with the right one than the left, so Kirishima has gotten used to walking by his right side before his custom hearing aids came in, and then just stuck to that. Bakugou's custom hearing aids block out any noise above a certain volume bc let's assume technology has advanced to do that. When he and Kirishima started thinking about working together as heroes even after they graduate, Bakugou requested custom ear protectors with similar block-out features as his hearing aids for Kirishima so his ears aren't damaged by working so close to Bakugou (Kirishima cried). - I'm actually quite flexible on which of the two I hc as trans, or if I hc both of them to be. The "both gay + demi Bkg" is pretty set in my interpretation of them, but I find it interesting how their friendship/relationship could manifest and grow somewhat differently depending on if both of them are trans or if only one of them (and depending on which one of them it is). They're still the same loud rowdy boyes we know and love but there's different conversations to have and difficulties to tackle between them based on that factor alone, and frankly? I Adore It.

Okay that's all!!!! I think. Thanks for reading, if you did!! And if not, I completely understand lol

I hope you had a great pride month!!

[flying-elliska]

What are the important bisexual characters that you said helped you? I am having a hard time finding good bi representation in which they aren’t considered promiscuous or unstable

Hiya anon ! What a quality question, thank you ! Here’s another mini essay about bi rep lmao.  If there are some that I forgot please tell me ! And to everyone, tell me about the bi characters who made an impact on your life, I’d love to know !!!!

Okay so.

-  When I answered the anon and talked about the characters that helped me come to terms with my sexuality, I talked about two in particular. Jack Harkness from Torchwood is depicted as very promiscuous, and somewhat instable. He still meant a lot to me because a) him sleeping around was never that much of a problem, it was because he was from the future, where things were different, which I thought was refreshing and b) his instability was because of the weight of being an immortal hero. Also fanon!Dean Winchester from SPN, as an older, more macho, emotionally witholding, badass dude written as bi meant a lot to me, but he doesn’t really avoid that stereotype either. But at least they were heroes.  However, I can understand wanting bi characters that actually don’t fit that stereotype, because bi people irl aren’t all like that, even if there is nothing wrong per se about sleeping with a lot of different people, or having mental issues to struggle with. And that was a while ago and now we have more and more cool characters ! Such as :

- Rosa Diaz from Brooklyn Nine-Nine. One of the best portrayals of bisexuality on TV imho. She didn’t start out as bi, she was this tough, cool, scary but with a heart of gold cop who had a lot of other plotlines before. But then, since they saw that a lot of wlw got this vibe from her, were really into her, and the actress came out as bi herself, they decided to use this. So it was super organic, and the way they introduced the subject was true to Rosa herself ; she’s a super private person, she doesn’t like anybody knowing about her life (it’s actually a running joke and Rosa Diaz has been implied to not even be her real name). But then she is dating a woman, and struggles with her parents not understanding and her coworkers find out, help her and support her. Her gay captain is there for her in his typical stoic but hilarious way. They organize game night with her when her parents won’t anymore. We see her crushing on women and dating, but it is treated exactly as the other character’s love life, they never make a big deal out of it. She isn’t the token queer character. She says outright she is bisexual and there is a specific point about her mom not understanding it’s not a phase and thinking she’ll end up with a man anyway, which #relatable. The focus is on the team as found family. Also right now she’s dating a butch woman, which is awesome since they are so underrepresented on TV and I hope we see more of her. That show really is my comfort show, it’s still bloodly hilarious and it really transcends the format to say some really deep woke stuff too, but never in a way that feels on the nose. Everyone should watch it tbh. 

- Korrasami ! Oh my god, I was so blown away when they got together. They’re two characters from the animated series Legend of Korra, they start out as rivals in love who have feelings for the same guy, but as they have to fight baddies together, they become bestest of friends, and both fall out of love with the guy. Then in season 3 and 4, their relationship becomes central to the show, as Asami stands by Korra through some really tough shit. Also, they’re both ultra badass and fight really well together. A lot of fans started reading their chemistry as romantic, but we’d never thought they’d actually go there. But the show ends with them walking into the ‘sunset’ (well, the spirit lands) together, holding hands. Now, it was never completely explicit on the show BUT they were dealing with a lot of censure from the networks and you have to be willingly obtuse not to read it as romantic. And after that the creators drew them on dates, and there is a comic series in which they are shown kissing, talking about their feelings, introducing each other to their families, etc. It made me feel so validated when it happened, and I just adore the whole ‘love triangle ditches the middle one and fall in gay love with each other’ trope. (is it a trope yet ? it should be.) It’s still a kids show at its core, but it has amazing depth and deals with some very deep shit. Korra starts off as a bit annoying but she has a really cool development, she’s a girl character we need more of - brave, dynamic but also brash and reckless and action driven in ways that are almost always exclusively shown for boys. And Asami is a more typical girly girl but she’s also a brilliant engineer and has a spine of steel and she’s also very slyly funny. They’re amazing. And the comics are super cute. 

- Now there are a lot of characters who are bi/pan that I love, and are good characters in themselves, but their arcs do intersect in some ways with promiscuity and mental instability. I’m thinking about Even from Skam and all his remake variants, Magnus Bane from Shadowhunters, several characters from Black Sails, Sarah Lance and Constantine from Legends of Tomorrow, Eleanor Shellstrop from the Good Place, Bo from Lost Girl, Ilana from Broad City, Joe McMillan from Halt and Catch Fire, God/Chuck from Supernatural (lmaooooo), several characters on Penny Dreadful, or in a totally different category, Vilanelle from Killing Eve or Hannibal from the series (who are hella bad guys but it’s never linked to their sexuality, and are also incredibly compelling to watch.)

 And even though these characters taken individually, I would argue, are good rep because they’re complex and layered and interesting and never one-dimensional (and watching them feels incredibly empowering at times)....it’s still a trend. I feel like when writing a character that is attracted to multiple genders, there is always this sort of...tangle of tropes that writers default to, unconsciously. Some negative and some positive. It used to be this trope of bis being villainous, instable, jealous, flaky, immature, perverted, manipulative, cheaters, amoral, greey, etc...and then it evolved into something of a reclaiming and subverting this trope. So now you feel like the Bi Character kind of has to be badass, glamorous, seductive, often superpowered or extraordinary in other ways.. And they also for multiple reasons (they’re immortal, they’re sensitive artist souls, they’re from the future, they’re psycho, they’re exccentric comic relief, they’re daring adventurers and pioneers) don’t care about social norms which allows them to sleep and fall in love with whomever. And so they tend to have those super busy romantic/sexual histories and very troubled backstories. In the past it was a bad thing, now it’s often presented as this positive, enlightened or at least fun and badass thing. They’re heroic, with big hearts, a tremendous lust for life and a cool rebellious attitude. They’re complex, dramatic, tortured. Which can be super cool, too. 

But it would be nice to have more ‘normal’ bi characters. I mean, boring bisexuals need to see themselves represented too ! Our sexualities don’t give us super powers. At the same time, it is true that bisexual ppl have higher rates of mental illness, which deserves to be explored, but it would be nice if it was actually articulated and not just part of this trope.  But still. We need rep, I think, that is more grounded and varied. So I think that’s also why I read a lot of fanfic. (I was really into the idea of bi Steve Rogers for a long time, partly also because he’s both very mentally resilient, kinda boring in a good way, and very unexperienced in terms of sex/romance, which is pretty much the opposite of the trope)

- I think books, and YA in general, are a good place to find these ‘normal bis’ characters. I’m thinking in particular of Leah from Leah on the Offbeat by Becky Albertalli (from the same book series that gave us the ‘Love, Simon’ movie) which is a super sweet coming of age/romance story about a super normal teenager who just happens to be also into girls (esp her best friend) and is loud and funny and very lovable and has zero doubts about being bi. You also have Adam Parrish from the Raven Cycle, another one of my forever faves ; he has an abusive family so PTSD from that but it never feels tropey, and it’s completely detached from his sexuality. He has magic powers, too. But his character feels completely opposite to the trope. He’s hardworking, somewhat withholding, prickly (and sometimes awkward), ambitious, determined, down to earth, and has a beautiful love story with another boy. And also Jane, from Jane Unlimited by Kristin Cashore, also really cool ; she’s a nerdy, smart girl who is actually inspired by Jane Eyre who has cool adventures in a weird house where we can follow her on different paths depending on the choices she makes, several of which are love stories. And finally the main character from The Seven Husbands from Evelyn Hugo, kinda fits the trope yeahhh since she’s a super glam actress who well, has seven husbands but it’s a pretty clever deconstruction since it turns out (slight spoilers) that Evelyn is actually through most of her life faithful in heart to the same person and the rest is mostly out of necessity, and her story feels very real and raw and down to earth. 

- I don’t go there yet but I really want to check out Crazy Ex-Girlfriend and Schitt’s Creek which I have read have very good bi rep. And I want to catch up on Orphan Black (Cosima and Delphine both don’t have exact labels but they’re multi-gender attracted and they’re this cool couple of scientists in a relationship that gets a happy ending). I will never forgive what they did to Lexa so I stopped watching but I do think that Clarke Griffin from The 100 is very good bi rep. Alexia from Skam France, meanwhile, is a bit of a boundary case for me because, even though she’s presented as the ‘weird one’ from the group, very colorful and liberated and exccentric, she’s still a very normal teen who’s happy and comfortable in her own skin, which is awesome. 

- Disclaimer, I included characters in here that are also pan/omnisexual or don’t have a label but are attracted to several genders, for the purpose of this discussion i don’t think the difference is all that relevant at least to me (i mostly identify as bi for the sake of simplicity but tbh i could also fit under pan so i feel represented by all those characters). But I understand the importance of characters that state their identities more clearly and with pride. 

- So in conclusion : there is nothing wrong with having a sexually active life or struggling mentally (even tho that one is not fun). And I do love all my badass casanova time travelling super powered bis. 

But we need more bi characters that don’t fit that trope. We need bi characters in children’s shows, or that don’t have more than one relationship, or that don’t have a relationship at all, to break the tendency to always show bisexual ppl as overly sexual. We need bi characters in committed relationships to break this idea that bi characters are bound to cheat or can’t be satisified with only one person. We need bi characters that are mentally stable and successful and happy, to show that it’s possible. We need bi characters that are boring, bookish, nerdy, ordinary, clumsy, not particularly seductive, socially awkward, rule-sticklers, etc...to show that bi people are not all party animals, or doing it for attention, or to be wild, rebellious and socially progressive. It’s just a sexuality, it doesn’t say anything about your personality. Even though there are some correlations with MI or being bi might bring you in contact with more progressive ideas and to see life a bit differently, there is nothing automatic about it. 

- In conclusion, reading testimonies from real people also helped me a lot. It’s a very dated but I got the book “ Bi Any Other Name: Bisexual People Speak Out “ when I was struggling with my own sexuality and it helped a lot, to read that even back then (1991) you had all sorts of regular ppl claiming to be bi and that it was not a phase or a fad or whatever. 

[sophygurl]

Okay, time for me to try and remember all the stuff I wanted to make sure and say about my lovely time at WisCon 43 this past weekend. 

Generally, I was just so pleased to once again get to extrovert all over the place in a space filled with amazing people. I got to hang out in my adjoining room full of my pals where we got to touch base with one another between running off to do other things and download our days to one another each evening. I got to enjoy several nice meals with friends I rarely get to see and acquaintances that I admire and respect. I got to have fascinating conversations with combinations of friends, acquaintances, and strangers in the lobby and at parties and in the hot tub. I got to sit on panels with intelligent and creative people with all different perspectives. I got to show off fun outfits and feast my eyes on everyone else’s cool shit and do the smile-and-wave at people I only see once a year even if we never got the chance to actually sit down and talk. I got to meet lots of new people and have adding frenzies on twitter and just generally delight to my heart’s content in awesome smart nerdy people who are also feminists with intersectional leanings - many of whom were also disabled and/or queer in a variety of ways. This is all what I just adore about WisCon so much. And it did not disappoint. 

Being my 10th WisCon, I have stopped being utterly shocked that people might know/remember me. But I’m still a little bit amazed and delighted by it - especially when it comes from folks who I admire a lot and also have not spoken to more than once or twice. I know some people are just better at remembering and recognizing people than I am? But it still never fails to impress me!

I was a little less schedule-y with myself this year than usual. Which is not to say that I didn’t have full written schedules of all the things I wanted to do (planning is my favorite of my OCD symptoms so...). But I was a lot more flexible about doing things like walking in late to a panel because I got excited to sit outside and talk to someone I ran into in the halls beforehand or leaving a panel early if I felt like I wanted to take my time getting to the next thing. I may have still written down all of the things I wanted to be doing in any given time slot and prioritized them in order - BUT I played it by ear at each time and often did a totally different thing. lol

I still did lots of panels! In fact, I find I get to so many panels that I don’t spend as much time just doing hang-out activities as much as I’d like because there is only so much time in a day. I once again never made it to the trans/genderqueer/non-binary space and only went to the disability space the one time for the organized dinner. Ah, maybe next year!

I also still took notes during the panels I went to, but not as copiously as usual, and my handwriting is getting worse all the time so we’ll see how/if my panel write-ups go this year. 

Getting my new walker the day before the con made a huge difference! It’s been two years since my previous walker broke down and I for sure noticed the difference in how much easier it was for me to get around to have one again. 

On the other end of things, I have really gotten used to my hospital bed and having to sort out how to sleep in a regular bed again was an adventure in positioning various cushions and pillows and blankets around and requiring more lidocaine for nerves that got bungled up. But it worked(ish). 

I also broke the toilet in our room. As in, neither plunging nor snaking did the trick and the maintenance guy had to take our toilet apart and cart it off and put a different one in it’s place. The replacement toilet was not currently in use for reasons that soon became obvious - lots of gurgling noises and self-flushing going on. But at least it flushed! 

A few more specific things:

I found a pair of hot pink denim capri’s at the clothing swap that I’m excited to try out! 

I discovered that my habit of suggesting lots of panel descriptions is more of a thing than I realized. Like, I knew I wrote a lot - I just didn’t realize how much more than the other average con-goer that was. I can’t decide if I should be more embarrassed or pleased/proud of this? But either way, it’s not going to stop me and I already have a huge list of ideas to write up for next year, so. 

Only made it to one party, but glad I got to that one. I find I don’t have the physical energy for dance parties anymore and have never been a huge fan of the sit around and make small talk parties, but the Secret Superhero party that Alexandra Erin and co. throw every year is a good one because 1) they give people Stuff To Do which helps cover for all manner of social awkwardness and 2) there’s already built-in a few people I know and can reliably socialize with a little bit so I have less of that tendency to walk in - peek around - see no one I know (or only see ppl I know already talking to other people) - get intimidated - and leave. 

Had planned to go to a lunch meeting for people to yell about The Magicians (of which I have a feeling my opinions would have largely been contradictory), but accidentally wandered off to lunch with other people without realizing I’d done so! Hopefully the 3 people I wandered off with did not feel as though I’d tagged along uninvited, but I certainly enjoyed the chance to get to know them all a little better. 

Once again did not make it to the Vid Party, but DID make it to the Vid Deep Dive panel, which was great. And have watched a bunch of the vids on the list now and am super excited about vids in general again and am hopeful that this will lead me to actually using my YouTube and AO3 accounts to specifically watch and fangirl over vids more. Vids are like magic to me and vidders like wizards - I am so in awe of their talent I cannot. 

Had some really interesting conversations about religion and fandom throughout the con - starting with my panel on the use of religion in SFF TV shows, dovetailing into a fascinating conversation down at the pool, and ending with some thinky thoughts coming out of the Antisemitism at WisCon panel. Possibly more on that later. Also possibly some more panels on the subject for next year?

Lots of panel topics and conversations this year ended up being about the combination of two subjects very close to my heart: 1) hope and/or redemption, and 2) community. Again, possibly more later and certainly some intriguing panel ideas for the coming year. 

I did buy two books this year! Budget does not always allow for book buying, but I did good on the food budget, so I allowed myself two during the sign-out. They were both from people I like to presume to call friends, which is always a nice plus - to buy directly from someone you want to support financially as well as personally. I got First Dates, Last Calls by Alexandra Erin which I’m excited to read and The Apocalypse coloring and activity book by Theo Nicole Lorenz which I’m excited to color!

I had wanted to get Laurie Mark’s final book in the Elemental Logic series Air Logic, along with the 3rd book (since a friend is planning to gift me the first 2 in the series), because Air Logic has just come out and the author and/or publisher were going to be at-con but by the time I got the Dealer’s room they were not there and by the time I left the sign-out they had not gotten there so it was not meant to be. But I still plan to get those books because I ADORE the series so far and am excited about the 4th. (I actually asked my library to purchase the book and am on the first on the holds list to get it once it’s in, so at least I’ll be able to read it soon if not actually own a copy)

As evidenced by my post the other day, I was thinking a lot about conversations being held about making sure more diverse voices are being heard during panels. I don’t have a lot of advice re: making sure more folks from more marginalized groups show up. But I find I did have a lot to say about making sure the panels folks are on end up being inclusive of many voices whether or not those ppl show up to be on the programming itself. And - I suspect - doing the latter well enough will help to foster more of the former as people will feel safer to come and share their perspectives as well as not feel like they have to always BE The Diversity Voice on every panel they choose to attend/be on. But I am a cis white chick, and I feel like it was mostly trans and poc folks these conversations were about, so I am eager to hear what other people have to say about all of this as and if they’re willing to share. 

I tend not to make it to GoH speeches or the Tiptree Auction because I have trouble with sitting still in a large room crowded with people type events. But as expected, even reading the text of Charlie Jane Anders’ speech made me weep with hope and joy and I hope G. Willow Wilson shares hers at some point so that I might also weep at hers. Those GoH speeches are always so inspiring and thrilling. I love this community. I am so grateful I became a part of it. I hope we can just always always keep growing and doing better to and for one another. 

Panels that I may or may not end up writing up a little about in the days to come: 

(the tail end of) Capitalism is Fueled by Anxiety

Favorite Queer Depictions in Fiction

Polyamory and Alternative Relationships

(the first half-ish of) New Pop Culture for Old Farts

Learning to Hear the Dog Whistle

Mental Illness in SFF

Vid Discussion Deep Dive

Antisemitism at WisCon

(parts of) The 116th Congress

Plus the five panels I was on, which will be less notes and more impressions: Killing Eve, Use of Religion in SFF TV, How to Write a Panel, Found Family, and Speculative Fiction on TV [also the spontaneous The Umbrella Academy panel which was small and informal but still really cool!]

[diminuel]

Listen, I've never understood (or quite agreed) with the idea of Bottom!only Cas, but, if people think this is a problem, they've never ventured into the kink memes. There are people out here shipping well, look up marvel & the HTP if you really want a shock, but point is, those ppl are happy to ship & let ship. If you were out here telling people it was your way or the highway, I can see why feelings would be hurt but you're just expressing a personal preference, for FICTIONAL characters. FFS.

Which is to say, you’ve finally run into the DESTIHELL part of fandom. The part that the bronlies and wincest ppl despise so much. The loud screaming part that insists destiel be canon OR ELSE. I miss when fandom was on LJ and everybody knew how shipping worked and how to treat each other with respect. :( (I did hop on twitter real quick and YIKES. those ppl need to take a chill pill. Maybe watch some ru paul)

Well… Bottom!Cas only is relative…? I only read or write or draw it, I don’t think only bottom!Cas is acceptable, imaginable, possible, good ;3 Just to clear that up.

Oh, I know the kink memes. *Elrond voice* I was there, Gandalf. But I also think many people who were involved in the discussion know of kinks. And there seems to be a bit of a tension between saying that kinks are acceptable to have and enjoy and saying that some kinks are rooted in harmful stereotypes. And sometimes people said the same things. Kinks are good, kinks are bad. So I guess there’s still an ongoing grappling with own kinks and others kinks and “Your Kink is not my Kink” approach of fandom sometimes gets lost.

I think there’s a bit of a mash up of several topics that might have made discussions even more charged? Perpetuating stereotypes in queer couples, the position of women enjoying slash ships, kink and kink shaming/ policing, the impact of fanfic and fanart on real life, freedom of creative engagement with topics VS criticism, plenty of interpersonal tension, heaps of yikes shared all around and probably even more things I didn’t see ALL mixed together into this little storm… It was too big to unravel and I feel people argued on different fronts, depending on your background and attitude… Lots of things probably don’t have anything to do with me, but it’s easier to have someone specific to make an example of…

I tought Destihellers was a mocking term people used to mean everyone shipping Destiel? I’ve been called a Destiheller too for doing nothing but shipping Destiel and I’m not Destiel be canon or else. ;3 (Though I’d like them to be canon. But my shipping exist independently of what happens in canon. I don’t need permission from canon or from actors or fellow fans to ship. I feel there was a shift in shippers interacting with canon where shippers now expect their ship to be canon and have people endorse it. There’s an intersection between canon/ people invovled in making the show and fans that hasn’t existed in that way when I got into fandom) In any case, I don’t know if the people who were invovled in the debate were part of a certain group within people shipping Destiel or anything like that. But I generally wouldn’t give anyone the title Destiheller. I still think we should be a bit more supportive of each other (no matter the ship we sail on).

I’m torn about missing LJ. Because spn_gossip and LJ rants (I don’t remember if that was actually the name) weren’t particularly inviting environments. I miss a time in fandom where people weren’t so eager to prove how up to date on latest issues they were by calling out people. Sometimes obsessively. I understand wanting to correct a narrative by proving what has actually been said instead of falsly following claims and misreported things by keeping track of receipts or whatever. But fact checking was certainly not a luxury that was granted to me in this whole fiasco *lol*

I think I drifted off topic…

[shibascarf]

I FOUND SOME FLUFF FOR YOU GUYS

Dug this out of my old chatlogs with @egoldtist​

i think they and i both did a tiny bit of drawings for this one too

here is 50′s au:

sofa: its just the jli as a weird vaguely incompetent 50s biker gang who try to cause A Ruckus but more often than not they just band together to drive out neighborhood threats

sofa: in any period au ted totally kind of hits on booster as a joke, to like tease him, and boosters like haha yeah right funny

sofa : until the dawning realization takes him

shibe : i love that like.... paradoxically.... the more open and queer-friendly a time period is, the more closeted ted is for some reason

shibe: hahahhaha

sofa : yeah omg

shibe : like, the more likely his flirting jokiness is to be taken seriously, the more cautious he becomes

shibe : i feel like if gayness had a death penalty, ted would be running around playing gay chicken like HA HA

sofa : HONESTLY

shibe : what a strange chubby man

sofa : true but i love him

shibe : i'm just imagining biker ted's bike

shibe : which he clearly calls the bug

sofa : oh absolutely

sofa : he probably builds in a side car later

shibe : ahhhhhhh

sofa : because as is soon very apparent, booster should be no where near bikes

shibe : the sidecar is dubbed "skeets"

shibe : because its squeaks

sofa : YES

shibe : booster trying to look intimidating in that sidecare tho

shibe : big goggles and all

shibe : they pull up alongside a convertible and booster has to look UP to stare the driver down

sofa : hes pretty sour about it

shibe : he looks great when they're in the pool hall. he's got a nice leather jacket. he's tall. he's' buff

shibe : but then you follow him out to the parking lot and he hops into that sidecar

sofa : its all over

sofa : he tries to do something to prove hes intimidating which is mostly ted driving around while booster smashes what he can from his sidecar

shibe : with a crowbar

sofa : they knock an old lady's mailbox over but she catches them and theyre like OH SHIT

shibe : DRIVE TED DRIVE

sofa : she catches them and in order to avoid prison time they get stuck using up their whole afternoon fixing it for her

shibe : but they do genuinely feel pretty bad

sofa : true

sofa : they repaint it and everything

sofa : it looks pretty bad but they tried

shibe : bea and tora ride by to just... watch and shake their heads

sofa : honestly

sofa : even guy gets in on it

sofa : just to make fun of them

shibe : guy's the asshole that drives through a mud puddle nearby to get it all over them

sofa : guy better be careful that old lady'll get him too

shibe : are you kidding, he petsits her cats every summer

shibe : (no one knows)

sofa : no one can EVER know

shibe : i'm sure they all go to the ice cream parlor and dance at sock hops

sofa : oh man absolutely

sofa : only about 3 of them can actually dance everyone else is pretty bad

shibe : ted's an amazing dancer for sure

sofa : booster can probably lift up whoever hes dancing with

sofa : ohhh yes absolutely

shibe : BOOSTER AND TED DOING THE JITTERBUG

sofa : YES

shibe : booster being like man, ted, you ever get jealous that the chicks get to wear those poofy petticoats and poodle skirts?

shibe : ted's like whatt

shibe : "ahahhaha  no nothing never mind"

sofa : yessss omfg

shibe : he totally has never been caught wearing michelle's when no one's home

shibe : it's not even a sexual thing, he just loves skirts and dresses

sofa : absolutely

sofa : they just look so GOOD its not FAIR

shibe : they're so SWISHY and POOFY and fun

sofa : theyre probably not as hot either

shibe : than leather? hahahhahah for sure

sofa : ted probably thinks about what he said later like

sofa : its not like he'd look BAD in them- ok wait nO

shibe : buys booster a jacket with a poodle on the back of it

shibe : like here

sofa : BOOSTER LOVES IT

sofa : he looks so happy about it

shibe : BEA COME LOOK AT MY JACKET

sofa : even though he cant wear it out much

shibe : tora tora toraaaaaaaaaaa look at this jacket

sofa : ted got it for me

sofa : teds the BEST

shibe : "why does it have a poodle on it booster"

[8 shibe : it's.... an inside joke

sofa : its between us...... 'friends'

shibe : "by 'friends' do you mean guys that make out in the boys bathroom and smoke together during homeroom"

shibe : BEA

sofa : THATS IT BEA

sofa : teds like "what cant two guys just pal around and kiss each other... for laughs.... come on"

shibe : "it's practice bea"

shibe : "we're practicing for junior prom. i'm gonna ask michelle out"

shibe : "NO UR NOT."

shibe : don't you even LOOK at my sister u creep

sofa : that's how ted realizes hes really, really actually gay

sofa : hes like kissing girls compared to kissing booster is not.. its not as good

sofa : fuck

shibe : he's at prom like "oh geeze"

shibe : "i've made a huge mistake"

sofa : hes so alarmed

sofa : on one hand hes trying to figure out how deep in denial he can be and on the other its like

sofa : what about booster

sofa : does booster like kissing girls more than kissing me

shibe : oh noooooooooooooooooooooo

shibe : booster's across the room slow-dancing with bea and sticks his tongue out at ted

sofa : ted just tries to act natural but hes totally thinking of asking booster to slow dance in private later

shibe : he's like "okay do i come up with an excuse or do i just ask him for real"

shibe : truthfully booster doesn't think kissing ted is like.... a huge amount better than kissing girls.  it's just better with ted because ted is fun and good with mechanics and gets it when booster is complaining about guy stuff

shibe : but then when he considers that dating a girl would mean not kissing ted anymore he's like ........nah i'm good

sofa : no thanks

shibe : i'm dying, just think of bea/tora making a deal with booster/ted to be each other's beards

sofa : OHHH H YES

shibe : they even stage a fake pregnancy scare one time so that eveyrone thinks they're a totally sexually active teen het romance

sofa : the challenge is to not act too outrageous while theyre on 'dates' because ted will start cracking up at any stupid thing booster tries while 'dating' bea

sofa : OHH MY GOD U KIDS

shibe : bea's like "i dunno" but then tora points out that it basically means they get to go on dates for free b/c the guys have to foot the bill

sofa : it leads to extremely cheap dates

sofa : but extremely cheap dates they still don't have to pay for

shibe : i'm trying to imagine ted and booster like.... slow-dancing outside the gymnasium by the dumpster, with earth angel playing tinnily from the door

shibe : cry

sofa : ohhhh no that's too cute

shibe : michelle like... keeping watch on the steps, smiling fondly

sofa : shes very proud of her brother but also: his tastes

sofa : because despite the gang stuff teds obviously still a nerd

shibe : the sheer relief that ted doesn't want to date her for real

sofa : HONESTLY

sofa : im dying purely in thought of all the gestures booster must do that counts as "look we're going steady" but no one will like go out of their way to ask them about

sofa : like giving ted his jacket

shibe : or his ring

shibe : or his pin

sofa : or carrying his books or something

sofa : YEAH

sofa : TEDS SO FLUSTERED but hes gotta keep it cool

shibe : guy thoroughly beating the shit out of anyone that laughs about them behind their backs

sofa : its enough to scare ppl into backing off at least

sofa : guy def still teases them all the damn time tho

shibe : oh totally

shibe : but like, no one else gets to

shibe : guy cracks a joke at their expense and someone in earshot laughs

shibe : and guy just spins around like YOU WANT SOME

sofa : i bet all of them get detention together too

sofa : that's usually when they collaborate with what they have to cover up at least like, 3 of guys worst cuts, and also to fuck around and copy off of ted's homework

shibe : i love that ted is like... a nerdy biker delinquent

shibe : how charming

sofa : YEAH

sofa : ppl are like, hes a bright charming young man, but hes such a trouble maker

sofa : shaking their heads

shibe : FOR HALLOWEEN

shibe : for halloween

shibe : booster dresses in drag and finally finally gets to wear his poodleskirt

shibe : it's the only acceptable time

sofa : YES

sofa : ppl think its a joke and he plays it off as much

shibe : oh for sure

shibe : but inside, he's glowing

shibe michelle plays along and goes as a greaser

sofa : but he keeps shooting these sneaky glances @ ted and ted has to shove him like CMON

shibe : "get it, we're twins, we did a set"

sofa : yesss yes omg

shibe : and at the halloween dance booster finally gets to dance in his poodle skirt

shibe : and he looks amaaaazing

sofa : ted is on fire like. the whole time

sofa : drags booster out back like I NEED TO TALK TO YOU

sofa : (there is 0 actual talking)

shibe : ahahhahhahahha

shibe : yesssss

shibe : it's like, legitimately the best day of booster's life. and that includes the time he made the varsity football team

sofa : yes absolutely

sofa : boosters probably just really glad hes got so much goin for him

sofa : like the varsity team, and a group of people who genuinely like him, and also ted

shibe : and a sister that's really helpful and supportive when she's not teasing him mercilessly

sofa : yes

sofa : auuug h h i just realized booster must have the stupid football jacket too damn it

shibe : ahhahahhahhahahhahahh ayes eysyesyesyesyesyes

sofa : im also thinkin like....... what if...... ted needs glasses... like those really thick ones

sofa : he doesn't wear them unless hes working on something REALLY important but he still def needs them

shibe : ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

shibe : big old coke glasses

shibe : booster reading menus aloud for ted

sofa : yessss omg

sofa : ted also coming over to fix anything that breaks in the carter family house because he knows they cant really afford to hire anybody

shibe : ah oh noooooooooooooo

shibe : booster and michelle working a bunch of jobs to help their mom

sofa : y es omg

sofa : assuming of course teds family is still rich he probably like goes to... any number of their jobs and tips them with like. all his pocket change

sofa : booster keeps telling him not to but he keeps doing it

shibe : booster behind the counter of a soda-jerk place

shibe : and ted's like, yes, i would like to make a special order

shibe : "we don't do substitutions ted. i've told you this. repeatedly"

shibe : not even forrrrrrr twenty bucks??????

shibe : *sides bill over

shibe : ..... i'll go crush up some candy bars and put them in your milkshake. you're the worst

sofa : TED OMG

sofa : hes just there eating it

sofa : completely satisfied with himself

shibe : GOING TO THE DRIVE IN THEATER

sofa : OOHHH BOY

sofa : almost getting kicked out of the drive in theater

sofa : because theyre actually super obnoxious

shibe : tora working as a waitress at a drive in burger place with rollar skates

sofa : yesss yess omg

sofa : i bet tora like

sofa : puts special patches or something on everyones jacket

sofa : just so everyone knows theyre all apart of the gang, together

shibe : oh man of course

shibe : MAYBE TORA

shibe : embroidered the poodle for booster's jacket

shibe : at ted's request

sofa : OHHH YESSSSSSSSS

sofa : the exact moment tora figured out ted was sweet on booster

sofa : one step ahead of the game

shibe : when she gave it to ted, she was like "good luck ted"

shibe : he was like ????? thanks?

sofa : totally went off to gossip abt it with bea and beas just like yessss

sofa : i knew it

shibe : WELL THEY KEEP EXPERIMENTING IN THE BATHROOMS

shibe : it seems obvious in retrospect

-------------------------------------

shibe: do u wanna talk about 50's au

shibe: b/c

shibe: i had a heartbreaking idea

[8/24/2015 9:26:22 PM] couch seat hands: oh my god absolutely yes

shibe: OK SO

shibe: i was thinking about ted going to the dance with michelle

shibe: and i'm like first of all how did she say yes, and was it even his idea

shibe: and i realized like....

shibe: booster got a date with bea first. and then ted was like "well have fun buddy"

shibe: and booster was like NO ur coming too, and ted is like i don't have a date???? and tora's going with guy

shibe:  so BOOSTER was like u need to ask michelle

shibe:  and ted was like hahahha yeah, she'll never say yes in a million years

shibe: and booster's like no, dude trust me

shibe: she'll say yes

shibe: so the next day, he asks michelle and she does say yes??????

shibe: which is awesome but confusing, but really cool

shibe: but then all of the next few weeks leading up to the dance, booster is working tons of extra hours

shibe: and he tells ted it's cool and whatever, but he's looking really really tired and he keeps falling asleep in class b/c he's working late night shifts at the general store

shibe: and long story short, booster's working extra hours so he can pay for michelle to buy a really nice dress and get her hair/makeup done at a salon, which is how he got her to say yes to ted

shibe: and now ted's guilty cuz he's there with michelle and it's not like he imagined it would be at all, but booster worked so hard just so he could go with a girl

sofa: AAAAHHH OH MY GOD

sofa: this KILLS THE MAN

shibe: i'm awful

sofa: u gotta tell me they save a dance for each other

sofa: like 1 at least

shibe: this is the one where they dance back behind the gym so yeah, totally

sofa: OoHHh right

sofa: yesss

shibe: but michelle looks so gorgeous, she is the most beautiful girl there

shibe: and ted still wants booster instead

sofa: aaGGHH

sofa: to be fair the carter twins are probably the most beautiful sibs in school

sofa: but gOD TED

shibe: booster and michelle do a dance together, as siblings, obvs

sofa: yesss

shibe: and then ted's like "can i cut in" and booster's like "oh, sure, ted" and ted's like "... n o can we go talk... outside"

sofa: OHHH

sofa: i am lovin this as a good opportunity to be like so u know how we kissed each other for practice? Well,

sofa: Bc those are the type of scenarios that keep me young

shibe: and michelle followed them and booster's like "NO SHHHhhhhhhhhhhh" and michelle is like

shibe: plz

shibe: we're trwins

shibe: no secrets

shibe: i know all

shibe: just like u know that i'm not a virgin

sofa: DANG MICHELLE

sofa: Michelle and booster are probably like.... the two kids u would least expect to be messing around and generally being delinquents, Bc they look like fuckin hallmark kids and also one of them is a cheerleader and a football star

sofa: but here they are

shibe: they fight tooth and nail for that popularity, hahahha

shibe: michelle with grooming and social ladders, booster with sports and working five different odd jobs

sofa: i imagine any time booster like... fucks up or breaks something at work teds always like I'll cover it don't worry

sofa: cuz obviously he's got the rich kid perks, and spending his money that way pisses off his folks

sofa: booster keeps telling him to cut it out b4 he gets cut off or something

shibe: honestly, i wonder how they started smooching in the first place

shibe: like, given the setting and all

shibe: for the 50's au, i mean

sofa: well i mean i figure it was probably like a "have you ever kissed a girl" "not really.. you?" and they agreed that if they did it strictly for practicing only, at first, it wouldn't be gay

sofa: and then it was

shibe: something like, if it doesn't kiss when you kiss a family member, it doesn't kiss when you kiss a bro

shibe: and also all the anti-homosexual propaganda usually had to do with pedophiles so

shibe: maybe they were just like "well it's nothign like that so"

sofa: ahhh truuu

shibe: oh nooooo

shibe: ted being like "holy shit i'm the worst pervert, NO ONE IS SAFE"

sofa: NOO OMG

sofa: how would booster even sort himself thru it omg

sofa: OR TORA AND BEA FOR THAT MATTER TOO

shibe: i feel like tora and bea get a pass b/c there were totally like

shibe: dime novels about lesbians and shit

shibe: i bet booster would like

shibe: go digging through his history books

shibe: and come back to ted with a long list of non-straight people

shibe: and be like "look, this is so normal, you can still be an awesome inventor when you grow up"

sofa: boOSTER

sofa: GOOOOSH

shibe: but at the same time, being like "if you want to keep this totally under wraps, we can do it. i'm so willing to do that for you"

sofa: i m gonna die holy shit

sofa: ted probably agrees with it because obviously its safer to lie low but hes also totally lousy with guilt

shibe: which is funny, b/c booster doesn't feel bad about it at all?

shibe: he spends tons of time pretending he's not poor as shit

shibe: what's one more charade on the pile

sofa: covers face

sofa: booster gold has fucking. ruined my life

shibe: he's such a sweet kind, innocent, vain asshole

shibe: protect him, universe, just as he protects u

sofa: HONESTLY

sofa: HES FULL OF HIMSELF BUT LIKE.. WHAT ELSE CAN HE DO AT THAT POINT

sofa: pls. what else Does He Have

shibe: ted must have an awful family

shibe: like, a gross dad that wants him to go into business and a sad drugged out housewife ma

sofa: ur probably right

shibe: ted probably lives in a big house

shibe: and booster throws rocks at his window and ted is like I'M ON THE FIRST FLOOR PLZ STOP

sofa: OMG YES

sofa: consistently tries to get ted to sneak out with him in the middle of the night

shibe: he's always getting off work at night and dying to go out for a shake or something

shibe: he's one of those people that gets wired and giddy when they're tired

sofa: absolutely omfg

sofa: those are probably his moments of pranking ingenious

shibe: they put green dye in bea's shampoo

shibe: but then she likes it so much she keeps doing it

shibe: prank failed

sofa: they still try to take credit for it tho later on

sofa: like

sofa: yeah ur welcome

shibe: people giving bea shit for being a "spic" and everyone like JUMPING IN TO FIGHT LIKE HEY

shibe: even tora

shibe: tora straight up pulls a girl's hair out

sofa: OOOHH YES

sofa: tora is very nice, and sweet and polite, but she can be fuckin brutal if need be

sofa: that's why the gang loves her

shibe: they all have polaroids of each other with black eyes and huge grins

sofa: ahhh yes yes yesss omfg