#already rlly regretting not saving her skins

[bithegai]

omfg so i checked on my false vods, bc of the namemc thing. and the way my stomach DROPPED when i thought i almost didn’t save that one pre-demise stream w ren

[catastrophichues]

smth that like. i end up thinking abt a lot is the way vil is a character whose in-game experiences are really mirrored by a big chunk of the way fandom treats him.

vils beauty is smth that he’s been villainized for his entire life. he’s too beautiful, too gorgeous, and in the minds of many, that automatically equates to things like “mean/evil/cruel.” as if his beauty = villain

and that perception is one he struggles with. no one lets him play the role of hero bc a lot of the time, a hero is someone the audience roots for and relates to. but no one can “relate” to vil bc his beauty others him. neige has a beauty that is innocent but also attainable. that’s what makes him the perfect hero. for some reason, it’s almost unfathomable to most that someone beautiful who also cares about being beautiful could be smth other than a “mean girl” or a villain.

and the thing is, vil does care abt beauty! and that’s okay! valuing beauty is not inherently evil, and the way fanon (and when I say fanon, i obviously don’t mean everyone, there’s also a lot of ppl who see vil and actually understand the complexities of his character) twists that to “forcing his standard upon others” is honestly wrong. vil holds himself to such a high standard, but the “standard” he’s holding others too is being the best versions of themselves they could be.

his correcting epel on language usage is literally not smth sinister or classist. the EN translation didnt get the translation accurate. correcting epel was literally abt being aware that not many would be able to understand epel if he continued to speak in that dialect, and in other cases, seen as rude. he was preparing epel for future opportunities and circumstances. epels grandma literally switches her way of speaking when meeting the boys at Harveston, so it’s not smth that’s got zero precedent.

and in cases where vil is believed to be envious of others beauty it’s like—who doesn’t feel jealous at times? he mentions being a little jealous that silver does nothing with his hair and yet it’s so fine. that’s understandable! vil is someone who puts work in his beauty. he doesn’t just coast on what’s already there he exercises. he cut out mayo even tho he loved it bc he ended up breaking out. he holds himself to strict food regimens. he makes beauty products. so like-this envy? it’s healthy, he expresses it, and then he gifts silver self-made hair and skin products. bc his envy doesn’t manifest as wanting others to be less than him. it manifests as appreciation and wanting to see improvement. bc!! he’s a good person!!

ive seen fics and content where it’s like “he values beauty/his figure over the lives of others.” my dudes. this man literally sacrificed his youth and beauty to save idia/close the underworld. “Oh but he regretted it! and he got it back!” yeah he cried his heart out who WOULDN’T! and as for getting it back—learning a lesson or making sacrifices shouldn’t always hinge on like whether or not the character makes these sacrifices continues to suffer or whatever. like redemption (even tho he rlly doesn’t need to be redeemed) doesn’t only become valid if someone suffers or if suffering is constant.

vil gets relegated to roles like “the bitchy ex” or the “mean girl” or someone who is constantly cruel and vain and a bully when that’s literally the antithesis of what vil is.

so for that, i really really appreciate the content creators who write fic or make art where vil as a character is more than the villain he tries so hard not to be.

[everseeking]

hello!! It's your relief story anon!!! i friken love what you wrote!!! may i have another request 🥺 similar to the relief story, Levi's s/o gets into a near death experience right in front of him and he freezes for the first time. everyone's super shocked abt it after the mission and he gets reprimanded just for formalities (erwin n hanji rlly just wanna check up on him personally) but they all understand since he's been through a lot. Levi can't deal with his emotions and he wants to say i love you to his s/o (first time saying it) but he doesn't know how and yes HAHAHAHA

- OMG HI AGAIN ! IM SO HAPPY THAT YOU ENJOYED IT THANK YOU SO MUCH !!!!! thank you again not only for requesting that, but also for requesting again, it’s so awesome when u guys come back and request more :) plus your ideas are always so great. i had a lot of fun writing this, i hope u enjoy <3 (and i got your second message tysm for adding it ! i tried to include as much fluff as possible but my dumb brain always defaults to angst hahaha)

how to say i love you

- levi ackerman x reader

warnings: season 2 and ova spoilers (if you haven’t watched the ova’s yet they’re on youtube but this only references ‘a choice with no regrets’ aka levi’s ova)

levi has never had...feelings for anyone before.

the romantic kind, of course. he's felt plenty of things towards people on a regular basis—anger. hate. disgust. confusion. annoyance. frustration.

to be fair he has had the occasional friend, or the occasional person who he respected, and others who he flat out wanted to protect. just never anything romantic.

this didn’t bother him, falling in love wasn’t his top priority or anything. his life has been one traumatic experience after the other. there was no time for him to be romantically involved with another, nor was he willing to take the risk of potential heartbreak that would add to his constantly growing list of traumatic events.

when he first met y/n l/n he acknowledged her as nothing more than another member of the survey corps. someone he would work with. someone he would train with. someone who he would give orders to if deemed necessary. someone who would join his team. someone he would slowly become more curious about. someone who would bring him feelings that he couldn't describe in words.

his plans had clearly gone astray.

y/n was supposed to be nothing more than a colleague, but somehow fate had much more in store. the young girl began to appear more and more in his life and before he could even process it, she was already apart of his team.

now that the they were spending almost everyday together, along with the rest of his team, levi had the opportunity to try to solve the mystery that was y/n.

there was something that he felt about her that he couldn't put into words. the way she was determined to save humanity and her friends, the way she poured everything she had into everything she did, the way she was strong in every aspect of the word, the way she got along with the rest of the team, the way she laughed, the way she smiled, the way she spoke, the way she moved, all of it. it all encapsulated him.

what is this emotion ? fascination ? curiosity ? these words weren’t completely right, but they safe enough for him to settle on for now.

yes, that's all. the brat just makes me curious because i don't understand her.

at least, that's what he told himself. but the tingles that remained on his skin from the place where she accidentally brushed up against him or the way his stomach felt after his eyes met hers or the way he noticed himself always wanting to be near her or the way he wanted to protect her more than anything in the world, said otherwise.

whatever message he wanted to send probably definitely was not passed on. when y/n accidentally brushed up against him he snapped back "watch it." when she made eye contact with him, it was more her meeting his eyes and him seemingly glaring back. when he took a few steps towards her to be closer, she felt paranoid, wondering if he was determining whether or not he should scold her for something. when she was on missions and he occasionally had to step in and save her tail, she felt like she was slacking.

truthfully in all these situations levi just resorted back to his true nature. he never meant any harm so clearly he wasn’t the best at expressing his feelings. henceforth, the three word phrase was foreign to him.

after all the many challenges that came with trying to understand each other, the couple finally got together. but despite being together, neither had said the 'L word’ yet. 

to be honest, y/n hadn’t dwelled on it too much. she had learned the best way to survive mentally was to live in the moment. when the time would come, the time would come, however, the thought that time wasn’t a guarantee gnawed at the back of her brain.  she always wondered how levi felt about the matter, but never got around to asking. little did he know he’d once again find out for himself that time wasn’t a guarantee.

just like every other day, y/n awoke to levi placing a kiss on her forehead. he wished nothing more than to let the love of his life sleep late into the morning in their shared bed, safe from the dangers of the world, but there was another mission today in which he needed her by his side.

the plan was to head to the outskirts of wall rose to a forest that was known to be surrounded by titans. hanji convinced erwin to let her try to capture titans in the forest again, as it all but worked on the female titan. erwin agreed, not only because he too believed the survey corps had all the materials necessary to capture titans again, but also because he knew the scouts needed more real time practice in the forest. levi wasn’t happy to hear the commander refer to this as “practice,” since so many lives were guaranteed to be lost in the process, but there was nothing he could do about it.

with everyone’s approval and the preparations complete, they were off. the ride there had been as close to smooth sailing as possible, with erwin successfully rerouting the troops to avoid as many unnecessary collisions with titans as possible and a surprisingly low amount of abnormals in their path. but everyone knew the real problems would be up ahead.

in this area, the titans were mainly surrounding the thick trees in the forest. it wasn’t too far from the forest where they encountered the female titan so the layout of the jungle was fairly similar. a large path ran straight through the trees, leaving the scouts lots of opportunities.

before the forest itself came into view, the hoard otherworldly creatures showed up. the crowd of titans didn’t seem to be too bad, with none surpassing ten meters. a bit of the outer edges of the formation took a hit, but everyone else made it into the woods unscathed.

unlike the last time levi’s squad was in the forest, their objective was not to be the bait. instead, they were to take to the trees and be on clean up duty. it was a little different from their normal clean up duty, as they weren’t doing chores around the castle or cabin—they were eliminating stray titans. the survey corps was only prepared to capture two titans, so any others that entered needed to be exterminated.

they weren’t the only ones with this job, but erwin placed them as the last hoop the titans had to get through before they were captured. any titans that escaped the first few groups were more likely than not going to be challenging, so they needed to be left with the most talented squad.

the eight scouts that made up levi’s squad traveled the path that cut through the forest until they found the four trees in which they were to set up camp. levi and jean were on the first tree, armin and sasha on the one across from them, connie and mikasa on the next, and y/n and eren on the fourth. the formation placed y/n and levi diagonal from each other so they could each defend half of the younger scouts in their squad if necessary, as well as had the team in pairs that weren’t often together for even more practice.

the ground rumbled beneath the group as they looked down to see the first wave of soldiers acting as bait pass through. after some time and a few more waves, including hanji and erwin who were in charge of the traps, everyone passed through and the titans came into sight.

the ground troops had all reported that no abnormals or titans above ten meters made it in so they all relaxed—or relaxed as one can be when they’re facing man-eating giants. levi recognized the last troop passing through and gave his second in command a nod which she returned, letting everyone else know it was show time.

the rumbling of the ground from the horses before was nothing compared to that of the titans. not counting the first two, there were nine titans in all. everyone gave a silent thanks to the squads who had narrowed down the hoard before it arrived to them.

finally, the first two titans ran past the trees levi’s squad was hidden in, chasing the ground troops. with a loud “now !” from levi, the rest of them deployed from their hiding places. thanks to the squad’s impeccable teamwork and countless hours of training in forests closer to home, the remaining seven titans were taken out without a hitch. y/n couldn’t help but feel a sense of pride as she watched her team improve with every mission and it was obvious they all felt the same way. the way they beamed and had to hold back their celebration was as a clear as day.

the team regrouped, with y/n checking the younger members for any life threatening wounds and levi double checking all the titans were taken care of. she had just finished examining sasha when levi came back and announced the next step of today’s plan. everyone was to head forward to meet the other troops and aid in getting the titans back to the walls. although the titans may be secured, there were still infinite possibilities for catastrophes that could happen so they needed all the backup they could get. the young cadets nodded in agreement then followed after levi as he took to the sky, with y/n tailing the rest of the group. if y/n and levi weren’t side by side during missions, this was always the formation everyone fell into. levi led the way, protecting the front of the party, and she acted as the caboose to make sure no one got left behind as well as to protect them from the back.

after a few failed tricks from eren as he tried to show off with his gear and a quick scolding from levi, the rest of the scouts came into view. the mission appeared to be a success. the final two titans were both apprehended, one nailed to the ground and the other bound in the air.

squad levi landed and began to greet everyone but didn’t get very far when hanji’s squeals flooded everyone’s ears.

the scientist was practically bouncing up and down as she came over. “squad levi ! all in one piece, i see. let me show you what we’ve done,” she gushed, ushering all of them towards the titans.

it was no surprise she was so excited. she had been waiting for this day to arrive for ages, but levi still gave a quick “tch,” under his breath out of annoyance which forced y/n to cover her mouth with her palm to stifle a laugh.

the eight, now nine, of them cranned their necks up to see the side of the beast that was hammered into the ground. the sight would’ve been cruel if it were anything other than a titan, but remembering all the pain they’ve brought to each one of them, no one did so much as bat an eye. returning the focus back to hanji, everyone watched as she took a sharp inhale to prepare for her long ramble about how everything worked. lucky for y/n, before hanji could exhale, levi grabbed his partner’s arm and pulled her away.

he pulled her close so he could whisper in her ear, “come on, let’s go find erwin.”

as much as she wanted to argue with him and tell him he was being mean, she really didn’t want to listen to hanji’s spiel that she had heard a million times over. a tiny pang of guilt struck y/n for leaving the other half of the squad behind forced to listen to her, but sometimes everyone has to take one for the team.

she threw a quick wave over her shoulder to the others, then followed levi, who was still holding her arm, as he dragged her through the crowd of other scouts who were just floating around, waiting for orders, until he finally spotted the commander.

the tall man’s eyes fell upon the pair and he drew himself away from whomever he was speaking with to come greet them.

“ah levi, y/n,” erwin began. levi’s expression stayed the same but y/n offered the man a small smile and wave which he returned with a nod. erwin was actually the one who recommended to levi that he should consider y/n to be apart of his squad, so she heavily credited him entirely with starting your relationship with levi (even if levi disagreed every time she told him this). 

levi and erwin fell into formal conversation, discussing the remainder of the mission, which left y/n realizing levi hadn’t really saved her from a talk you’ve heard countless times before, but instead brought her into another one. 

hanji’s rambling would have been more interesting than this she thought to yourself as she began lazily scanned the small sea of scouts scrambling around, looking for a way to entertain yourself until the two men were done talking. one group in particular caught her eyes.

the soldiers seemed to be much more jittery than everyone else. they frantically looked amongst each other and towards the titan that hanji had just finished showing the rest of levi’s squad, and seemed to be contemplating a solution to an unknown issue.

it was clear something was up. 

just as she placed her hand on levi’s shoulder to bring his and erwin’s focus over to the scene, the ground began to shake, which caught their attention for her. 

no one had time to react when dust flew up everywhere, obstructing everyone’s views so they couldn’t see where the loud crashes that followed came from. a strong force slammed into them, throwing them who knows how far into the air. the fear of hitting the ground barely had enough time to settle into y/n before everything went dark.

everyone in the vicinity had been sent flying into the air along, but levi was the first one to be up on his feet again. bringing his arms up to shield his eyes, he decided to stay where he was as the dust cleared so he could assess the situation and move on from there. 

the scene finally came into view; he gathered that the titan had ripped its arm through the nails that secured it to the floor of the woods, then flailed it around in an attempt to grab people. it made a clean sweep in the area that he was previously standing—all that was left were debris and broken wood planks from the compartments that were attached to the other titan’s traps.

a wave of adrenaline passed through his body as he remembered who was with him. he needed to find not only erwin immediately, but also y/n. he reached down to grab the handles of his controller grip but froze instantly upon seeing what had just come into view as more of the dust cleared.

y/n was sprawled out on the ground, ODM gear tossed a few feet away from her body but more importantly, the titan’s hand was hovering mere meters above her.

his pulse almost quickened twicehold, but it felt as though it heart had stopped in his chest. situations like this presented themselves to levi almost everyday of his life, but this was much different. in those, he was almost two steps ahead. he knew that by now he should be wrapping his arms around y/n and pulling her to safety at breakneck speed, or even better, he should’ve shielded her from harm at the very beginning. but right now he couldn’t do so much as move his finger.

levi was completely inert—his arms felt like they being weighed down by a ball and chain, his legs felt like they had grown roots into the ground that planted in him place. his throat ran dry and his stomach felt like it had just done a flip. the rest of him went numb while shock consumed his body, physically and mentally, rendering him entirely helpless.

images of isabel, farlan, petra, oluo, eld, gunther, and countless others all flashed before him, the same running theme echoed in his mind—he wasn’t able to save them. all he had to do was pull back a single index finger. this would launch one of his anchors into the back of the titan’s neck, sending him flying to slice its nape. but he couldn’t do it. the only thing he knew he had the power to do was watch helplessly as his partner would be eaten alive.

the shouts of others flooded his ears as his senses slowly began to return to him, but it didn’t matter. he couldn’t make out a thing. frankly he wished he could so he could break away from the things that occupied his mind now. shame. guilt. humiliation. fear. regret. he took for granted every moment he had ever spent with y/n. every smile she gave him. every time he embraced her. every kiss. every conversation they shared under the stars while everyone else was fast asleep. every opportunity he had but failed to tell her that he—

before he finished his thought someone finally broke through his trance. erwin was the one who was able to crack the surface and bring him back to life. 

the commander was shouting levi’s name, hoping, praying, to wake him up from whatever was going on in his head. levi was still unable feel his body, but he realized he was moving as the ground began to grow smaller. one of erwin’s strong arms hooked around levi’s middle and they were flying away from the chaos below. the commander spared a glance to levi to see the man’s eyes were still trained on y/n.

the feeling returned to levi’s body as he felt the pain of being thrown onto one of the thick tree branches surge through his body. not knowing how else to bring him back from the trance that wasn’t full broken, erwin had tossed off of him levi instead of placing him down gently.

he watched as levi scrambled up and expected him to yell back for throwing him, but the response was much different.

“where is she ??” levi demanded. his eyes may have been on y/n the whole time, but his mind was elsewhere replaying scenes from the past. he had no idea if she had been eaten, or even survived the initial attack. the only think he saw was her body on the ground, unmoving.

“safe,” erwin confirmed. “hanji ran over just in time and got her. but what happened to you ?” no one had ever seen levi freeze up the way he did. others believed it was just fear which made him seem a little more human to them, but erwin knew it was more than that.

throughout the years, erwin watched levi witness the deaths of those closest to him, and even then he was still able to act. but after seeing him go rigid, erwin was more than worried. it was clear levi went into shock, however, shock runs more than skin deep. 

this became even more evident to him as levi remained silent the entire way back to the walls. y/n was still unconscious, so one of the open carts was her escort. guilt continued to wash over levi as he wasn’t able to ride in the cart with her to monitor her closely because he had to ride his horse back. regardless, he stayed as close to the cart as possible and stole as many glances her way as he could.

if he had it his way, he would’ve waited outside the infirmary for y/n when they arrived back home, but hanji and erwin practically dragged him to the mess hall to replenish his energy. this may or may not be skipping the part where levi was questioned about what happened, followed by him being chastised for his actions (or lack there of). levi could bare focus even though it was such a serious conversation. his mind was still a hazy mess. as much as hanji and erwin wanted to talk to levi more about the situtation, they knew it was best for the conversation to end there for the day. levi looked so shaken up that he could barely keep himself standing so the last thing he needed was to be yelled at more. the entire corps also made sure to steer clear of the man. he usually had all his emotions hidden but they were on full display now. it still scared the hell out of them.

but the fear alone wasn’t enough to stop them from whispering to themselves. word carried fast about how captain levi froze up and watched one of his squad mates almost die. the ones who only heard about the story instead of witnessing it couldn’t believe what they were hearing. the captain levi did nothing while one of his own almost became titan food ? 

hearing the whispers in passing, levi didn’t care that they were talking about him, but he was still affected. their words just made reality sink deeper into him. they weren’t the only ones who were unable to believe what happened. he really just watched helplessly as someone almost died. and it wasn’t just someone, it was his other half.

“hey levi ?” hanji voiced, pulling him out of his head. levi didn’t bother looking up from his food that he had been staring at for the past few minutes to face her. the best he could to was give her a side glance as he peered at her from the corner of his eyes and waited for her to finish.

the glare he was sending her way made her blood run cold, but she took the hint and continued. “are you alright ?” she asked in a small voice.

“does it look like i’m alright ?” he growled back, then went back to eating.

“just wanted to ask,” she added with an awkward laugh then turned to erwin who was on the other side of her. for once in her life she knew not to press any harder, but making levi upset wasn’t her intention. she was genuinely worried about him. hanji gave erwin a what do i do now ? look, hoping for some help, but erwin could only shake his head. he cared about levi just as much as she did, but he knew there was nothing either of them could do or say to make levi feel better. the only thing he needed was to see y/n.

at last, levi finished his dinner and excused himself to go find his partner. as his feet carried him at a quick pace across the stone floors of the many hallways in HQ, fear came back to his already grim mind. there was no word on y/n’s condition so he assumed no progress had been made and she was still unconscious. 

needless to say, when he rounded the corner and saw her sitting on the bench right outside the infirmary swiveling her heels and tapping her toes together as if she was bored, shock overcame him once again, this time on a much lower scale. similar to just a few hours ago, he was frozen instantly upon seeing her. it was a much prettier sight this time, but it was still painful to see. the bandage that wrapped around her head peaked out from being any strands of hair that fell in front of her face, other wraps and patches plastered themselves across her arms and legs, and some purple and blue splotches peaked out from behind them. this was only the skin that was exposed. for once in his life levi didn’t want to think about what she looked like when she weren’t wearing any clothes. he made a quick mental note to later place tender kisses on all her bumps and bruises, and took of running towards her.

y/n had been discharged from the infirmary during dinner hours, so the halls has been quite empty as she sat outside alone, falling into boredom. when the first sounds of shoes hitting the ground entered her ears, she got a bit excited, but calmed herself down reminding herself it probably wasn’t him. but when the steps got quicker and louder, she finally let yourself look up to see up to see her partner was the source. there was no point in holding back anyone; her face visibly lit up and a wide smile placed itself on her lips. just like levi, y/n wanted nothing more in the entire world than to see him. 

he run turned to a jog then a complete stop as he halted in front of her. despite being so anxious to see one another, neither were really prepared. they just kinda...stared at each other, neither sure of the right words to say. levi decided to take the initiative. he opened his mouth, hoping something, anything, would come out, but his attempt fell flat. words just weren’t enough. instead, he lifted his arms and placed both hands gently on y/n’s shoulders. she caught on quickly, standing up at the same time as he was pulling her into his arms for a tight embrace.

the pair remained silent in each other’s arms until y/n decided to take initiative this time and finally spoke. “is it true ?” she mumbled against his neck, barely loud enough for him to hear.

as much as he had hoped the gossip would stay in the mess hall, levi knew that inevitably word would spread to her. someone must have told her everything that happened, leaving in every little detail about how levi made no moves to save her life, ending up having to be saved by hanji in the end.

based off his silence, y/n knew levi had a lot on his mind so she continued “did you really freeze up?” 

he didn’t realize it, but he had tensed up at her words. it absolutely pained him to answer, but he couldn’t imagine the pain she were feeling. 

summing up his courage, he began to confirm the worst, but she pulled away before he could get more than a “yes,” out. levi braced himself for the hurt expression that he would be faced with, knowing his heart would break instantly as she realized he truly did failed to protect her, but instead he was met with kind eyes and soft face.

the look on his face had utter disbelief written all over it as her hands went up to cup his face that was now reddening. “are you okay?” y/n asked softly. “im so sorry.”

levi was beyond bewildered. he wanted her to be furious at him. yell at him. pull her soft hands back and strike him as much as she pleased. tell him he failed and that she couldn’t stand the sight of him. he knew he deserved it all and more, but he should’ve known she would never do that. that wasn’t y/n.

he melted into her touch and placing one of his hand over one of hers that remained on his cheek. “i was terrified, y/n.”

y/n finally gave him one of her beautiful smiles and giggled softly. “why were you scared ? i was the one who almost got eaten,” she teased.

y/n’s laughs had quickly subsided after seeing the serious look that had etched itself onto levi’s face. “because you were in danger,” he started.

“i don’t know what id do with myself if i lost you, i...”

“i love you, y/n.”

it was finally y/n’s turn to get a taste of the shock that levi had been experiencing all day. she could’ve sworn her heart skipped a beat at his words, followed by butterfly wings tickling the inside of her tummy, her eyes widening and jaw falling slack. her hands slowly slipped from his face to instead place one of her palms on her chest to make sure her heart was indeed pumping at a regular pace.

levi, on the other hand, was not having a magical experience. y/n’s reaction made him feel as though his feelings weren’t reciprocated despite having been together for so long. he started to get deeper into his head, negative thoughts starting to eat away at him once again, when she finally spoke.

“i love you too, levi,” she breathed out, still too stunned to breathe properly.

levi had had enough of being unable to move for one day. one of his hands grabbed y/n’s waist while the other found its way to the back of her head, as he kissed her roughly, which she eagerly returned. the way he felt her grin against his lips was enough to make all the pain and fear he had experienced that day worth it.

he couldn’t have asked for a better outcome to such a shitty day.

levi had finally learned how to say i love you and he thanked the stars every night following that day that y/n was the one who taught him how.

[sunahyuga]

how can i become someone else?

read on ao3 here

inui felt he would never be deserving of koko’s love.

the blond loved the money-making genius to death, but he knew he wasn’t what the boy wanted. koko was in love with his sister after all. his dead sister. it was why he had this insane mindset when it came to the item of modern trade. how to make more, how to save as much possible. the never-ending need to save the already dead akane who still lingered in the back of koko's mind and was fixed in the deep pits of his heart.

inui envied her. he envied her for being who she was. he envied how much koko wanted her.

akane was beautiful. with her sunflower blond hair, sky blue eyes, and pale white skin, inui didn’t blame koko for falling when he first laid eyes on her.

well, inui did have the same features as his late sister, but it would never be the same. first and foremost because he was a completely different person, and two, because of the scar on his face. it was a strong reminder of the day koko’s heart was ripped from his chest, left to burn in the blazing flames, and the day inui became fully aware of his romantic feelings for koko.

inui would never forget the look of terror and regret on koko’s face when the boy had realized he’d saved the “wrong” person. at that moment inui felt as if a sword had been thrust into his chest, and he wished he were the one dead.

as said before, inui would never forget that moment. it would become the basis of his insecurities. that he “wasn’t enough” and was “undeserving.” all because he wasn’t his sister.

oh, how he wanted to be the object of koko’s desires. he wanted to revel in the sweet, kind warmth of koko’s arms. he wanted to curl up and stay there for all eternity.

but no, that could never happen. inui wasn’t what koko wanted. he wasn’t what koko deserved.

 he wasn’t akane, and he never would be.

--

a small drabble i decided to also post on here. i’m not rlly much of a writer but i just randomly thought of this while waiting for my mom’s old laptop to turn on lmao. hope u enjoyed !

[strangepumpkinfantasies]

|Chaos makes a muse|

hi! is it possible for me to request a horror au oneshot with jb where the reader gets kidnapped or something and she gets hurt then when he finds her he gets rlly protective and realizes how much he loves her with a fluffy ending? Have a good day :)

It has been five months since Y/N and JB were seeing each other, apparently their relationship was getting stronger by everyday. However Y/N was working in a bakery shop that Jaebeom used to visit most of the time. 

12 pm 

You were still busy serving customers when you felt your phone buzz into your pocket, quickly heading to the employees exit door you answered the call. 

‘Y/N we need to talk, come outside.’ JB said in a serious tone.

With a deep sigh you told him to wait a few minutes, you went to the locker room to apply some lip balm and fix your messy bun. Thus, you had a really long day and all you wished for was to see him, obviously he was your everything, so lately with all these family reunions barging about their daughters getting married to rich guys and them being lucky to do so, you grew sick of hearing the same stories all the time you’d visit your parents. In fact as much as you hated these stereotype fairy tails you became interested, starting a family with JB has become one of your goals. Nevertheless you were unable to discuss this matter with him.

You checked your reflection on the small hanging mirror one more time before you made your way outside the bakery shop. Tiny drops of sweat were running down your chest due to the high temperature outside, you smiled widely once you caught his good looking sight. You slowly approached each other.

“Babe I missed you.” You attacked him with a hug.

He doesn’t say anything for a moment. “Uh yeah me too, listen there’s something I need to tell you.” 

You curved an eyebrow and nodded. 

“You know that you mean the world to me and I’ve enjoyed your company all these months....but I don’t think we’re gonna work out like this.” He held your hands in his.

Your heart aches when these words left his mouth. “What do you mean we’re not gonna work out? what about all these months we spent together?”

“I don’t know but I might move to the US to run my father’s company it’s just my life’s a mess right now, you deserve someone better than me y/n.” His face show unhappiness. You dryly swallowed feeling a lamp in your throat. 

“But I really want to be with you, we can face struggles hand in hand..” You tried your best not to cry. 

He cupped your face with both hands. “I know baby girl, but it’s best for us to stop seeing each other.” 

With that being said, you pushed him away. “Alright, if that’s what you think...don’t ever come near me again, I don’t wanna see your face.” 

He tried to grab your wrist but you yanked his hand while running back inside. Once you made it to the locker room your broke in tears. 

-One hour before the end of your shift-

After your little argument with JB you decided to wipe your tears and move on with your life, you thought that all you have to do is live the moment and work hard for a brilliant future. Apart from all that being done, you and your work mate Elena were the only ones left in the shop performing your final duties before closing. 

“You good?” Elena asked with full concern. 

Forcing on a fake smile you say. “Yeah thanks.”

“Come on I heard you crying earlier...you can tell me about it instead of bottling it inside.” She patted your back. 

You shook your head. “Me and JB are no longer- omg behind you!” 

“What? who’s behind me?” Elena’s eyes widened once she turned back. “Aaaaah!” she panicked once she saw a group of thugs holding their guns to our direction. 

You forget to breath for a second when they surrounded the two of you leaving  no space for you to escape, you held each other with fear and stood still. 

Your heart beats were going unstable, yet you decided to bravely stood up for them. “You want money? okay have it! but don’t hurt us.”

A tattooed dude with men bun approached you while laughing. “How about you shut your dumb ass mouth before I shut it for you, we are here for her but since you are a witness.....” He licked his dirty lips while eyeing you up and down. “We can’t leave you behind.”

“I promise we won’t turn you out to the police, just take the money and let us go.” You stuttered. 

He scoffed. “Bitch shut your fucking mouth, one last warning.” Gritting his teeth he grip Elena’s neck while she yelled, you tried to help her but another man held you back. “Let her go you scumbag.” You yelled. 

“Long time no see mami, you thought our deal’s over? that you can run away without paying your debt? well you’re wrong muffin.” He brushed a piece of hair behind her ear.

She cried. “I swear I don’t have the money...please I’m sorry I will pay you back your money...this is between us let her go she has nothing to do with this I’m begging you.”

“Of course you don’t have $200,000 that’s why I came here today, both of you are coming with me tonight.” He sniffed Elena’s hair. 

You looked at her surprisingly, you never imagined that she that kind of person who would do illegal stuffs just for money now look at the trouble she caused. 

With a deep breath you say. “Listen I...I have some savings...I can give you my credit card details.” 

“How much do you have shawty?” He crossed his arms over his chest. 

Clearing you throat. “$250,000.” Elena shook her head in disbelief.

“Your credit card now.” He raged at you. 

Bringing your wallet from the locker room one of the thugs went with you, cursing under your breath you pretend to search inside your bag but instead you were dialing 911, unlucky you it was on speaker so you got exposed. 

“You slut pray for your life now, move!” He grabbed your hair tightly dragging you down so you were pulled through the floor. You screamed at the top of your lungs. “Boss she called the police.” You were thrown at their boss’s feet. 

He cursed in Italian. “You think you are smart?Ah I’m gonna have to ruin your beautiful face sadly.” with that being told he slapped you making your bottom lip bleed. “Take them to the van now!” he outraged. 

-No where to be found-

You woke up to Elena’s whimpering, to your shock both of your were tightly tied to separated chairs with tape on your mouth. Thus, your wrists were hurting due to the rope’s sharp material, trying your best not to cry you shut your eyes hoping this was all a bad dream. How your life turned upside down within a minute after JB gave up on you, now you wished he was there for you to end this nightmare. 

“Now ladies we’re gonna have some fun.” Their boss says while holding a leather whip. 

One of them took off the tape from your mouth letting you have a few sips of water. “Good girl.” 

“Since y’all can’t pay back the money, you’re gonna have to chose other payment methods...Elena knows already.” He sent her a death glare. 

They untied your wrists and forced you to stand up. “You’re gonna strip for our boss.” 

At this moment your blood starts boiling, temperature arising your hands formed into fists. “Okay..” you whispered while approaching his ugly figure sitting on a chair. 

“Let me see what you got.” He smirked. 

You made a disgusted face and say. “This.” with that being said you kicked him off the chair and spat on him. “You’re the definition of disgust.” 

In a blink one of his men forced you on your knees while gripping your hair. Their boss finally went back on his feet with an angry face, you gulped in fear regretting the moment you thought you’d smarten up, now you’ll end up being hurt. “Tie her arms back facing me NOW!” He shouted at his men. Them doing as told, you tried to fight them but they were way too strong, you gritted your teeth when you felt the back of your shirt tore apart letting the cold air hit your bare skin. You could see stars when the whip came in contact with your skin, and that being repeated forcefully creating more pain.

“That’s what you get *whip* you think you’re smart? *whip* Imma teach you a lesson that you’ll never forget *whip* you dumb bitch.” He yells each time he hit your skin with the leather whip.You on the other hand was slowly loosing it.

-Jaebum’s P.O.V- 

After y/n and I had our argument that day I haven’t heard from her ever since, which has got me worried about her, I was being a coward when I pushed her away from my life, didn’t know what has gotten into me that day more likely my father was putting a lot of pressure on me asking me to give up on her and move on to the US. Yet he was wrong, from now on I’m gonna follow what my heart wants. 

I was staring at a diamond ring that I bought a while ago for y/n, deeply thinking  before my phone ringtone shook me off my thoughts quickly answering, hoping it was her. 

“Hey.” I said.

“JAE! It’s me Elena...please you gotta help us! they are hurting y/n.” A crying female’s voice caught me off guard. 

I panicked while asking her too many questions. “Wait..hold on what happen? where are you now? calm down okay...can you describe the place you are in?” 

Jogging to my car I called one of my friends to help me track their location through the phone call, driving in a high speed my whole focus was on rescuing her, tho I had no clue what was going on, but one thing I was sure about that these motherfuckers were gonna pay for everything.

Not so long I received the location, biting my lip from frustration. “Hang on babe, here I come.”

-End of JB’s P.O.V- 

Back to you, Elena was getting punished when they found her using their phone. Tears were running down your cheek, feeling a sting in your heart because you were unable to help her. “I’m so sorry..” you mumbled while keeping eye contact with her. The room was filled with cries and sorrow.

“Now who’s gonna save your ass?” The thug says while laughing. 

“Well, that’s gonna be me.” A familiar voice caught you off guard. Your heart beats fastened when you figured who it was, Jaebum. 

“Who the fuck are you? get him!” 

Hopefully you the rope was a little long so you twisted your arms just to see the love of your life. A wide smile formed on your lips when you met his gaze. 

“Right I haven’t introduced myself..” Jb itched his eyebrow with one hand, his other was behind his back. Quickly pulling a nail bat he hit the thug’s face hard. “I’m your worst nightmare motherfucker.” 

JB hurried to you with a worried face while untying you, once your wrists were free you fell into his arms. “Easy there sweetie, you’re gonna be okay.” He kissed your forehead. Wrapping his hands around your back you whimpered in pain and backed away from him. “What’s wrong y/n?” He reached to you but you yanked his arm, this time he didn’t back away in fact he grabbed your wrists and slowly turned you to back face him. “Oh my god...” 

“Who did this to you!?” JB held both your shoulders while gritting his teeth. “It’s him..” With that being said, JB jumped on the same guy that was hit throwing punches on his face. “She’s just a women asshole!!!” 

As much as you wanted the jerk to pay for what he did to you, it wasn’t fair to watch him die under your lover’s hands. “Enough Jae!!!” You yelled. 

Apparently JB weren’t buying any of this, he was getting more aggressive. Holding his nail bat he kept hitting the thug’s back till he bled. “No one hurts her and gets to live!” Other scumbags were coming at him but he eliminated them with each smack on the face. Not too long the police came and took the criminals away, and provided first aid service. 

-A week after-

After the incident you stayed a few days at the hospital till your wounds fully recovered. Everyday JB would bring you rose bouquets and chocolate, sometimes he would stay the night while holding your hand. 

At the moment you were staying at his apartment since he insisted on taking care of you. You appreciated everything that he did for you yet you was still mad at him. Laying down the sofa you were eating ice cream while watching a tv show. 

“Hey y/n come with me.”JB said with a slight smile. 

You pouted cus you couldn’t finish your ice cream. “Where?”

“Trust me, it’s a surprise.” He held your chin slowly leaning in. 

You knew he was going to kiss you but you placed your finger on his lips. “You’re not getting any kisses just yet.” 

“Oh why not? don’t I deserve sum...”He narrowed his eyebrows. “It’s alright lets go bae.” 

He led the way to his bedroom, once you walked inside your jaw dropped.

 You turned to face him but he bent on one knee holding a ring box. You gasped in shock. 

“Yeah..I know it’s too late, I almost loosed you..I realized that my life without you is useless...so um haha...Will you marry me y/n?” He says in a cheerful tone. 

You laughed at how cute he sounded, tears formed in your eyes due to happiness. Finally your wish came true. “Yes.” hearing your answer he stood up to spin you around. “Oh you’re making me dizzy haha..”

“Sorry...I love you so much.” He caressed your hair.

“I love you too, now...” You whispered before you planted a kiss on his lips. 

He made a pouting face. “Oh man finally I get to taste your cherry lips again.” 

“Don’t be dramatic.” You suppressed a laugh before you crawled on bed. Following after you he rubbed your back gently. “Do they still hurt?” 

“A little.” You hummed. 

“I could kiss all your wounds babe, you’re safe and I’m always by your side.” He assured before kissing your lips again. 

*Happy ending Yay!* 

~So I hope you enjoy reading, always feel free to request. 

(Gifs not mine.)

[hellish-oc-blog]

name: beelzebub incubus meaning: beezlebub is a devil name & incubus is a type of demon nickname: beez (only by godfrey) reason: its a cute pet name birthday: 14th feb; the year is unknown age: unknown how old they look: late teens, they often say theyre 16/17 weight: roughly 70kg height: 6 foot body build: thin face shape: rounded rectangle eye colour: none,, he just doesnt have any irises glasses etc: he sometimes wears colour contacts to fit in skin: lightish brown distinguishing marks: rounded horns & missing tooth predominant features: horns again & eyes bc all white hair: dark dark green hair type: messy floof with shaved sides & back horns: marbled pink & very rounded voice: smooth and fairly high attractiveness: v cute and occasionally can be hot af physical disabilities: none usual fashion: baggy jeans & hoodies with no designs fave outfit: these cute shorts, thigh highs & tank top they only wear for godfrey jewellery: 1st ear piercings on both ears good personality: really caring (esp abt godfrey) bad personality: theyre rlly fucking loud and never seem to realise it mood character most often in: hopeless romance or anxiousness it depends on whether theyre with godfrey sense of humour: self deprecating & dick jokes greatest joy: GODFREY greatest fear: new ppl why?: they always start worrying if the new person hates them already what event would turn life into turmoil: anything bad to do with godfrey most at ease when: watching tv & cuddling godfrey enraged when: people don’t understand rocks depressed when: his hair isnt floof enough priorities: passing their psychology degree & keeping godfrey happ life philosophy: to collect ALL the rocks if granted one wish: to not have anxiety why?: it makes life fuckin hard soft spot: ROCKS & GODFREY is it obvious: he cant tell (it is) greatest strength: his demon powers even though he cant control them fully greatest weakness: godfrey in thigh highs biggest regret: trying to cut off their horns bc they thought godfrey hated them (godfrey loves them) minor regret: blinding henri biggest accomplishment: learning all of the periodic table and impressing godfrey minor accomplishment: learning german past failures that are embarrassing: when he tried to help godfrey out of hell but messed it up completely why?: its embarrassing that hes supposed to be a rlly strong demon and cant fully control their powers darkest secret: his actual dad is an angel so hes not fully demon he just says he is does anyone know: only his 4 closest friends and godfrey motivations: to fucking defeat all the shitty ableist ppl immediate goals: get 100% on a psychology test long term goals: to control their powers how he plans to accomplish these: keep revising and practicing how other characters might be affected: someone might be blinded again like last time hometown: the outskirts of hell type of childhood: pretty lonely cause their mom was super busy and they were too anxious to make friends pets: they dont rlly like animals so they just had rocks first memory: accidentally blowing up his room cause he was messing around with his powers most important memory: being accepted as non-binary by their mom why?: because it means a fuck ton to him childhood hero: his dad even though theyve never met dream job: professional rock enthusiast education: top quality; still in uni rn religion: atheist finances: pretty damn rich current location: uni in some english speaking country living with: in a big dorm with godfrey, henri, kevin & the twins pets: henri has a german shepherd as a guide dog religion: atheist still occupation: bowling alley person finances: since they came up from hell; not too good mother: lamia incubus relationship: pretty good; beez comes back down to hell every so often to see her father: ambriel — relationship: hes never met his dad but looks up to him massively siblings: azarael incubus relationship: they used to be close but not anymore spouse: not married buf godfrey relationship: head over heels in love children: none favourites colour: the shade of green their hair is least fave colour: bright orange music: classical food: ghost chilli peppers literature: non-fiction (primarily rocks) form of entertainment: sexy times witj godfrey transport: trams prized possession: this bigg black opal azarael gave him hobbies: learning loads of random facts musical instrument?: nope sport?: lacrosse how they would spend a rainy day: cuddling with godfrey and watching netflix spending habits: they rarely buy stuff cause hes saving up but he cant remember why smokes: no drinks: sometimes drugs: no what do they do too much of?: crying what do they do too little of?: exercise extremely skilled at: anything to do witj school hes a highclass nerd extremely unskilled at: cooking nervous tics: shaky hands and bouncy leg, occasionally clapping usual body posture: completely straight mannerisms: they overuse hand gestures when explaining things peculiarities: he scratches his horns a lot optimist/pessimist: pessimist intro/extrovert: introvert daredevil/cautious: daredevil logical/emotional: mix of both disorderly/methodical: methodical working/relaxing: both; depends who with confident?: nope animal lover: nah how they feel about themself: better than they used to be but still not confident especially about him being a devil one word hed use to describe himself: nauseating paragraph hed describe himself by: a hopeless romantic with ugly eyes and horns that knows a lot about rocks and psychology damn i love godfrey what does he consider good personality trait: extensive knowledge of rocks bad personality trait: im not good enougj for godfrey best physical characteristic: probably my legs theyre fuckingg LIT worst: anything thay reveals im a demon how other characters perceive them: cute and precious MUST BE PROTECTED AT ALL COSTS most likely to change about themself: demonic features opinion of other ppl: scary scary hide true opinions: not really character he hates most: he loves them all but doesnt really get along with henri since he blinded them best friend: KEVIN love interest: GODFREY character he goes to for advice: karen and he doesnt know why character he feels responsible to take care of: henri 100% character he feels awkward around: henri character he openly admires: godfrey character they secretly admire: susan