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night-fallz · 4 years

Text

XY’s Muse

Based on this prompt

Like I have stated before, this is my first fanfic. Please let me know what you think of it. Any kind of criticism will be welcome.

uploaded on 01/23/21

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Ao3 // Wattpad

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Chapter 2

XY was staring at the ceiling. A week has already passed. And he still couldn't stop thinking about the day he spent with Marinette. It was the most fun he'd had in a while.

Before the whole Silencer fiasco, his father would not stop pressuring him to produce a new song. So when they met up for dinner and his dad came up with the idea of stealing someone else's music, he couldn’t bring himself to decline.

XY knew it was wrong.

But all he wanted was the chance to finally impress his dad. Bob Roth might not have the best attitude towards him, but he was all XY had left.

Xy already lost his mom. He would not lose his dad too.

At least, that's what he believed. He should've known that his father was just using him for money. According to his dad, money was the most valuable thing in life.

XY scoffed. He should've known better. He should've known that all his father thought of hi-

He felt a buzz in his pocket and his face immediately brightened. Marinette just texted him!

Marinette: what's up?

Marinette: have u been inspired yet?

Marinette gave XY the idea to just sit back and let inspiration hit him. It was a common idea but it was one that most people tend to forget in the long run.

XY: nothing much

XY: and nope.

XY: my dad has been pressuring me to come up with something tho

Marinette: ignore him

Marinette: he's just mad cause he can't get any ladies

The three dots popped up on his screen.

Marinette: OH CRAP I'M LATE

Marinette: TTYL.

XY rolled his eyes and smiled.

They've been texting back and forth these past few days. He's learned so many things about her and vice versa.

It was nice. It's been a while since XY has had a friend.

Maybe she'll be even more, XY couldn’t help but think as he ran a hand through his hair.

"Huh," XY said out loud. "Even more"

And just like that, inspiration for his next song hit him.

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Marinette was thinking of a certain blonde-haired, blue-eyed musician when she heard her phone ring.

"Tikki!" she screamed, staring at her phone as if it was Hawkmoth himself.. "He's calling me. XY is calling me."

Tikki sighed and floated next to Marinette, "Maybe you should answer it. It would be pretty rude to keep him waiting."

"Right, right," Marinette answered his call and hoped her voice didn’t sound as squeaky as she thought it did.. "Hey."

"Hey."

There was a moment of awkward silence.

Marinette didn’t know what to do. She glanced at the small goddess.

Tikki rolled her eyes at their awkwardness as she gestured to the phone. Ask him why he called you, she mouthed to Marinette.

Marinette nodded. That was a smart idea. "So," Marinette cleared her throat. "Why did you call me?"

"Right, Uhm." Marinette heard him shuffling around his room. "You know how you've been asking me if I was inspired and stuff?"

Marinette's eyes grew wide and a huge smile took over her face as she started to nod before remembering that he couldn't see her. "Yep." she eagerly said, "Did you find any?"

"Yes!" Marinette could hear the excitement in his voice. "I was actually wondering if you wanted to design the outfits for my music video."

Marinette's eyes looked shocked. "Yes!" she jumped around in excitement before remembering she was still in a call with XY. "Why me though?"

XY’s voice sounded confused.. "What do you mean, why you? You're literally perfect for it. You're talented. Plus, everyone loves your designs."

Marinette’s cheeks resembled a tomato. She has never been more thankful for the fact that he couldn't see her right now.

"Thank you." Marinette managed to mumble. "That really means a lot."

"You're welcome." XY said. Marinette had a feeling he was smiling though. "I have to go and have my dad listen to the demo. But I'll text you later, okay?"

"Yep," Marinette whispered and gave Tikki a cookie. "Good luck. I know that whatever song you came up with is gonna sound good. No matter what he'll say."

Marinette heard a faint "Thanks" from the phone before the call ended.

Marinette screamed into her pillow and looked up and saw Tikki look at her with amusement. “I think I like him.”

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"So, what do you think?" XY asked as his father finished listening to his song. "Is it bad? Do you think people will like it?"

Bob Roth grinned at his son. "This is a Masterpiece. Where did you find this?" He gestured to the video of XY singing the song, "Who did you steal this from?"

XY's proud smile immediately turned into a scowl. "What do you mean, who did I steal this from?" He yelled at his dad, his blue eyes glaring at him as he grabbed the demo from the table. "I made it. I came up with it myself." XY felt his eyes tearing up. "Something you would actually know if you thought of me as something more than a money-making machine."

How could he? XY thought as he climbed up the stairs. Is it that hard to believe that I could come up with something good?

XY slammed his door shut. "All I wanted was to prove to him that I wasn't a talentless son." XY put his hands on his face. "I just wanted to make him proud."

XY felt a buzz in his pocket and immediately knew that it was Marinette. After all, she’s the only one that ever texts him.

Marinette: how did it go?

Marinette: did he like it?

XY wiped away the tears that were starting to come out of his eyes. He couldn't help but smile. Marinette certainly had an effect on him.

XY: he called it a masterpiece

Marinette: yes! I knew he would like it.

XY: yeah

XY: but then he asked me who i stole it from

Marinette: THAT JERK

Marinette: WTF

Marinette: THAT's SO MESSED UP

Marinette: HOW COULD HE-

Marinette: DO YOU WANT ME TO BEAT HIM UP FOR YOU????

XY laughed at her text messages. He only started to text her and he already felt better.

XY: no, it's fine

XY: i actually yelled at him

Marinette: ...

Marinette: do you feel better?

XY: actually, yep.

XY: he's a really sucky father

Marinette: for some reason, a lot of the blondes i know have a toxic parent

Marinette: it's kinda sad

XY: maybe it's a paris thing

They texted back and forth, XY laughing at the memes Marinette sent.

XY: You're definitely a daughter of Athena

Marinette: ( ⚆ _ ⚆ )

Marinette: is that a percy jackson reference i see

XY: yep

XY: have u read the books?

Marinette: duh

Marinette: you haven't lived til you've read the books

Marinette: sadly, the movies sucked tho

XY: I KNOW

XY: ANNABETH WASN'T EVEN BLONDE

Marinette: EXACTLY!!

Marinette: SJSJSJSJSJSJ

Marinette: THE MOVIES SCARED ME FOR LIFE

XY: oh yeah

XY: before i forget

XY: what's ur insta?

Marinette: which one

XY scrunched his eyebrows up in confusion.

XY: What do you mean by which one?

Marinette: i have two

Marinette: one as my personal one and the other one for commissions and stuff

XY: ohhh

XY: smart

Marinette: i know ;)

Marinette: my personal one is @Mdupaincheng and the one for my commissions one if @MDCdesigns

XY switched his apps and searched up Marinette's personal instagram. He clicked on the first result that came up.

The profile picture was Marinette in a blue, silky dress that went just above her ankle. There was a slit on her left leg that showed her knee. It was nighttime and Marinette was practically glowing under the city lights. She was staring at something on her right side, with one hand running through her silky black hair which was down for once.

She looked hot.

After XY stopped admiring her profile picture, he finally noticed her follower count.

She had 200,000 followers. 200,000.

It wasn't as high as XY's follower count, that was still quite a lot.

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XY: i didn't know u were insta famous

Marinette: wdym?

Marinette: which acc

XY: ur personal one

XY: u have over 200k followers

Marinette thought that she read his text wrong. There's no way that Marinette had that many followers. 200,000? There was no way.

Marinette: ur lying

XY: I'm not.

XY: check ur acc

It's been a while since Marinette has logged onto her personal account. The hate she got the last time she's been signed in was too much for her and when Alya told her to log out and just focus on her other account, @MDCdesigns, she couldn't bring herself to argue against her.

Marinette hasn't even thought of that account since that day. So when she logged in and saw that XY wasn't lying, she accidentally dropped her phone in shock.

Tikki looked at Marinette with a questioning look.

Marinette ignored her kwami and texted the blue-eyes boy back.

Marinette: HOLY SHIT

Marinette: I HAVE 200k FOLLOWERS

Marinette: HOW TF DID THAT HAPPEN

XY: when was the last time you checked ur acc

Marinette: about 3 months ago

Marinette: the media thought i was adrien's gf and his fangirls came at me

Marinette: i got a ton of hate and a friend of mine told me to log out and just focus on my @MDCdesigns acc

Marinette: so i did

Marinette: i haven't thought abt that acc since then

XY: the fangirls were probably just jealous

XY: it's been months so they probably calmed down

XY: I'm looking through the comments rn and so far the latest hate comment you've got was about 2 weeks ago

XY: you've got a bit of a fanbase yk

Marinette: WHAT DO I DO

Marinette: DO I JUST CONTINUE NOT TO POST OR SHOULD I POST SOMETHING ON MY STORY ABT HOW THANKFUL I AM FOR 200k

Marinette: HOW COME NONE OF MY FRIENDS TOLD ME ABT THIS

XY: don't post anything rn

XY: post a picture of yourself and the caption it something that shows ur thankful for the number of followers u received

XY: OH

XY: a few hours before u post the picture, make sure u post on ur story abt how ur back from ur break on social media

XY: that way ppl will understand why u haven't been active

XY: it'll also have ppl prepared for ur post and they'll be waiting for u to post it

XY: that'll give u more engagement and stuff

Marinette: thank u

Marinette: that was really helpful

Marinette: when should i post something?

Marinette: AND I STILL DONT KNOW WHY MY FRIENDS DIDNT SAY ANYTHING ABT THIS

XY: u told ur friend that u were taking a break from social media right?

Marinette: yes

XY: then they probably weren't expecting u to post anything so they weren't checking ur insta

XY: u should post something on the weekend

XY: that way ppl wouldn't bother u during school this week

XY: if u want i can help u come up with ideas tomorrow?

Marinette: yes, please!

Marinette: do u wanna come over

Marinette: we can plan it in my room so that ppl won't overhear us

XY: guess I'll see u tomorrow then

XY: just text me the time ur available and I'll be there

Marinette: make sure to wear a disguise tho!

Marinette: we got lucky last time and no tabloids caught us

XY: ur right

XY: we must've been really lucky if no one got a pic of us

XY: but okay

XY: I'll wear my best disguise

XY: goodnight, princess

Marinette blinked a few times, making sure she read the text correctly.

Princess.

Marinette: goodnight ♥

previous II next

This is the first chapter of the story. Please let me know what you think

1,967 words

Tag list:

@iglowinggemma28 @mica-aa @lady-bee-fechin @maskedpainter @snnoww26 @ravenr22 @spiritofchaoticdreams @ravennm84 @heaven428 @finn-cipher @peterxwade24 @aliceofice22 @queenamongthorns @captainmac6

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aomine-ryo · 4 years

Note

Yay, your ask is open even tho I am sorry for those who requested before. I wanted to ask for GOM reaction when their gf is a member of a dance cover group. You mostly do sexy girl dances but sometimes also complicated swaggy boy group dances. Hope it's not too much to ask! <3

Ah you didn’t mention if you wanted scenarios or headcanons, but it’s alright, I’ll just do headcanons, I hope you don’t mind! Also they’re a bit short bc I’m not too familiar about dance but I did my best and I hope you enjoy xx

Headcanons: GOM with an s/o that’s in a dance cover group

Kise

When you told Kise that you were in a dance cover group, he assumed that you meant some normal hip-hoppy group dances

While you did do that sometimes, your group really liked to do more ‘sexy’ dances

So when you showed him one of your videos, his jaw dropped

He just didn’t expect to see your body move like that

He was a mixture of shocked, impressed and slightly aroused

“Y/N-cchi why didn’t you tell me about this sooner? You’re awesome!”

“Really? Thanks,” you smiled

“You know what would make you guys better though? The addition of a certain person that knows how to break it down,” Kise said smugly, referring to himself

“And who might that be?” you laughed, playing dumb

“Obviously me, you dummy,”

He was joking for the most part, but sometimes he’d insist on dancing with you whenever you were alone with him

He’s literally your biggest fan

He likes and comments on every video you post in a matter of seconds of it being uploaded

He loves to support you in everything you do

Kuroko

He’s a very passionate person and he loves to be supportive of his loved ones’ passions too

So when he learned that you liked to dance and that you were a part of a dance cover group, he was nothing but thrilled

He barely even paid attention to the sexiness of the dances because he was just impressed by the talent and coordination in your group

“Y/N-kun, you guys are so talented,” he smiled at you

“Aw thank you Tetsu, that means a lot.”

“Maybe you should teach me how to dance sometime. I’m awful at it,” he admitted, thinking maybe it’ll give you an opportunity to spend more time with him whilst enjoying dance

Of course, you thought it was a great idea

So you would teach Kuroko how to dance in your free time

And he genuinely believed that he was falling more and more in love with you after seeing how passionate you were towards dancing

Midorima

Midorima always hears you talking about being in a dance cover group but it took him some time to realise that he’d never seen any of your videos

So he finally asked you to show him one

And it was far from what he was expecting

How did you make dancing look so sexy?? He thought

Easy to say, he became incredibly flustered after watching to video

“Well what do you think?” you asked when he didn’t say anything

“Huh? Oh, you guys are pretty good,” he said, clearing his throat and avoiding eye contact because he didn’t want you to notice his cheeks getting redder

“Thanks Shintaro,” you beamed, “there are more videos like this on our page.”

“That’s cool, I might check it out later then,” he said, trying to be nonchalant

The very same day, he ended up watching every single one of those videos

He couldn’t get enough of them

You just moved so effortlessly and you looked so hot while doing it

He was nothing short of impressed

Aomine

Aomine’s head was practically always empty, but after you showed him a video of one of your group’s dance covers, suddenly it was the only thing that occupied his mind

Something about the way you moved your body got Aomine hooked onto your dances

He found himself watching all your videos almost every day

Mainly the sexier stuff because although he found the more edgy ones impressive and cool, the sexier dances had him practically drooling

“You know, you should do these dances when you’re alone with me,” Aomine grinned suggestively

“It seems like you’re enjoying those videos a bit too much Daiki,” you laughed, although you were glad that he liked what you did

“You just look so good when you dance, I can’t help it,” he shrugged

He wasn’t lying; he was absolutely addicted to watching the way your hips swayed to the sound of the beat

Of course, the thoughts that ran through his head weren’t the most innocent

But that was to be expected of Aomine, all you cared about was the fact that he was extremely supportive of you

Murasakibara

Murasakibara isn’t interested in much, so he’s hard to please

All he cared about was basketball, food and you

So when you showed him one of the dance cover videos you made with your group, all he really focused on was you

Although his expression didn’t show much, he was quite amazed

You looked even sexier than you normally do and it definitely made him a little flustered

“Woah Y/N-chin, how do you move like that?” he said once the video was over

“I don’t know, practice I guess? Do you like it?”

“Well duh, you looked incredible. You’re too good, it’s not fair,” Murasakibara said

“Thank You, Atsushi,” you smiled, “I can teach you if you’d like?”

“No thanks, I’d rather not move. I’d just look like a wiggly noodle anyways,”

It goes without saying that Murasakibara actively keeps up with all your posts

Whilst he didn’t care too much about dance, he did love you a lot so he always made sure to be as supportive as he possibly could

Akashi

He cares about you so much to the point where he had memorised your schedule

So it goes without saying that he was incredibly interested in the dance covers you make with your group

He’s not one to use social media too much, so the only notifications he has on are for you

Whilst he did find your dances incredibly hot, he was mainly just proud of the fact that his s/o was so talented

“Seijuro, what did you think of the new cover we posted?”

“You were incredible as always, my love,” he’d say with a smile as he placed a kiss on your forehead

He also liked to help you practice when you needed it

He wasn’t too good at the more upbeat dances so he’d often just watch and give you pointers based on what he can observe

However, whenever you took a break he liked to slow dance with you

As the two of you slow danced, he liked to talk to you

“You know, you’re really talented, Y/N,” he’d say softly as your hips swayed in sync

“That’s so sweet of you to say, Seijuro,” you blushed

“I’m so lucky to have someone as amazing as you are.”

#kuroko no basket #kurokos basketball #kuroko no basket x reader #kuroko tetsuya #aomine daiki #kise ryouta #akashi seijuro #midorima shintaro #murasakibara atsushi #generation of miracles #knb

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maria-scribbles · 4 years

Text

glitter + crimson (let’s start a riot)//part three

summary: while mother nature isn’t very kind to the obx, jj’s dad is even worse to him. sailor sees the aftermath, relives a day that changed her life forever, and realizes she’d be down with murder if she could get away with it. between nutella sandwiches, story time, and a shared bed, an unspoken thing slowly starts to become a little more real.

word count: 6.9k+ (oops 😅)

ship: jj maybank x oc (sailor flynn)

warnings: abuse/neglect, blood, mentions of parental abandonment/gambling addiction, swearing, whump, hurt/comfort, fluff, blatant references to hocus pocus, the little mermaid, percy jackson and the olympians, and mean girls (and a teeny, subtle reference to stranger things, see if y’all can catch it! 😉)

a/n: i was so excited to write this part, not gonna lie (if you couldn’t tell, just look at that word count). hurt/comfort is my shittt and i’m a pretty big slut for physical comfort/touches so i kinda went ham with it lol. i’m also very happy to finally introduce everyone to peyton, who’s a character i really love and enjoy writing, especially her relationship with her gf alison. both of them will get some time to shine in this part, peyton in the present and alison in the past! as usual, this is unbetaed so all mistakes belong to me. enjoy!

gif credit to @sci-fi

~Masterlist~

part one | part two | part four | playlist

part three: storm surge

It rains the entire week. Scratch that -it storms: the whole island buffeted by howling winds and blanketed by a thick layer of dark and angry clouds that make life just shy of miserable. For someone who spends 99% of her time outside like Sailor, miserable doesn’t begin to cover it. And to think, it’s only the beginning of hurricane season.

The redhead props her chin in one tan hand as she leans against the cool marble counter of The Butterscotch Bonnet Ice Cream Parlor, watching the rain pound against the shop’s bay windows. Across the street she can just make out the rough, gray surf of the Atlantic through a tiny gap in between two buildings and she sighs wistfully, thinking about all the beautiful shells getting tossed onto the beach by the waves. She’s half tempted to just throw off her apron, hop the counter, and make a break for the sand, storm be damned.

She’s almost positive she wouldn’t even be missed. There isn’t a customer in sight and there hasn’t been one since she started her shift three hours ago. Peyton was still in the back kitchen, messing around with whatever convoluted ice cream flavor she thought up for this week; her boss definitely has a knack for concocting weird combinations that somehow work together, at least most of the time. Sailor thinks back to a few weeks ago when they debuted that delicious blackberry balsamic that sold out every day without fail, then followed it with a cilantro lime that was hit-or-miss (a definite miss in her opinion, as cilantro just tastes like soap to her; Peyton had just smiled her infectious smile, shrugged her tiny shoulders, and said, “Can’t win ‘em all, I guess.”) This week’s flavor involves mascarpone and peaches and she can’t wait to steal a sample because if the wonderful smell coming from the kitchen is any indication, it’s gonna be bomb, even though it probably won’t upset the shop’s namesake flavor from the top of her list.

Thinking about ice cream makes her kind of hungry, on top of the fact that she has a terrible habit of eating when she’s bored, so she dishes out a small scoop of Butterscotch Bonnet and grabs a spoon before leaning back against the counter, digging through the cup to find the best part: salted caramel-filled chocolate sea shells, made in house. The days Sailor gets to help make them are her favorite days to come to work, when she and Peyton commandeer the kitchen and have the time of their lives, blasting music and dancing as they slave away. Of course, the little bag of chocolates she gets to take home is a pretty big plus, too.

“That’s coming out of your paycheck, Sail.”

Spoon halfway to her mouth, she sheepishly glances up from her snack as Peyton emerges from the kitchen, fondly shaking her head and sending her inky black braids dancing across her shoulders.

“What am I gonna do with you?” She continues with a wink before starting to make herself a milkshake, dropping two scoops of their tiramisu flavor into a malt cup.

“Sorry, you know I can’t help myself!” Sailor knows the other girl was joking but she apologizes anyway and opens the cabinet to grab a cup and straw for her, setting them on the counter beside the old-fashioned milkshake machine. As far as bosses go, Peyton is one of the all-around best to have and the redhead loves working at her shop. While the Buckleys are rich as shit and total kooks, the family’s youngest daughter is down to earth, kind, and prefers to work hard for what she wants instead of flaunting her parents’ wealth and The Butterscotch Bonnet is proof that, despite her last name and penchant for the finer things, she’s a pogue at heart. It’s no wonder Alison’s head over heels for her.

“I also know you’re bored as shit.” Peyton calls over the sound of the blender, sending a knowing smirk toward the younger girl, who rolls her eyes and shovels another spoonful of ice cream in her mouth as she replies, “Obviously. This weather fucking sucks.”

A loud clap of thunder seems to shake the very glass in the windows and she gestures toward the storm outside, her point proven. Peyton glances around the deserted shop, still bright and cheery despite its lack of movement and life, then back to the relentless downpour, before shrugging and turning back to finish blending her milkshake. “Wanna go home early?”

“Seriously?”

“Why not? You’ve already cleaned this whole place from top to bottom and I don’t think we’re gonna be getting customers any time soon.” Ignoring the paper cup, she plops the straw straight into her drink and takes a big sip, then nods in satisfaction before adding a huge swirl of whipped cream on top.

“Have I ever told you that you’re the best?” Sailor asks, smiling excitedly as she grabs her bag from under the counter and tosses her empty cup into the trash.

“Only every day,” the older girl replies cheekily, smiling as she’s pulled into a one-armed hug of thanks by her employee.

“Well, you’re gonna hear it again: you’re the best.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Peyton pats the redhead’s shoulder with one deep brown hand and then gently pushes her toward the kitchen. “Now get out of here, brat. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Yes, ma’am!” Sailor throws a peace sign over her shoulder as she heads out the door, cackling at her boss’s offended call of “don’t call me ma’am!” After clocking out, she fishes her keys out of her bag and dashes through the downpour to her beat-up clunker of a truck. A hand-me-down from Alison, Flounder’s nothing to look at with all the dents and chips in his blue paint, but he gets her where she needs to go and has room for surfboards in the back and two other pogues up front on the bench seat -and the other two unlucky ones riding in the bed, hiding under the boards- so she’s not complaining, even though she wishes his radio worked more than half the time.

(Two reasons why John B’s almost always the group chauffeur: the fact that he can legally drive all five of them around without breaking the law -not that they’ve ever gotten caught in Sailor’s truck but anyone with a brain knows that where one pogue goes, the other four aren’t far behind- and good music flowing from a perfectly working stereo.)

Unfortunately, it’s on the fritz today so her drive home is spent listening to the sounds of Flounder’s windshield wipers and the pounding of rain against his roof. She heads inland from the beach, away from Peyton’s shop in the outskirts of affluent Figure 8 and its kook mansions to the more homey, laid-back Cut, passing by the turnoff to the Chateau and through the woods before pulling into the empty driveway of her tiny house. The fact that her mother’s car is no where to be found doesn’t surprise her in the slightest. Waiting for her on the porch is Binx, the stray black cat she’s taken to feeding and more or less adopted, stretching on the blanket she left out for him.

“Hey, handsome,” The redhead says, kneeling down to give him a loving scratch behind the ears; he meows in response and rubs his fuzzy face against her ankles, weaving between her legs as she slides her key into the lock. “Come on in.”

The front door closes behind them with a hollow bang that echoes through the empty house like the thunder outside. Sailor hangs up her keys and follows Binx down the hall toward her room, ignoring the closed door that leads to her mom’s room and a bed that she assumes hasn’t been slept in in months. Not that she would know: she’s made it a habit to spend as few nights as possible alone in the house, instead crashing at the Chateau or Kiara’s place and hoping her mom’s comfortable in her makeshift room at The Sandbar where Carmen doesn’t have to deal with the teenager she’s supposed to be caring for (Sailor’s always been an independent girl and has no trouble getting by alone but fuck, that doesn’t mean she wants to.).

Her father’s green eyes, the same color as her own, stare back at her from a picture hanging on the wall of a better time, when everything was alright and her family wasn’t so broken; the three of them on the beach with a twelve year old Sailor in the middle and surfboards in hand. Carmen looks like the mother she remembers and misses so bad it hurts, and while Ryan wasn’t always the most caring of fathers and only acted like a dad when it was convenient, she’d still do anything to have him back, terrible parenting skills and all. She turns away from the picture and the complicated mess her heart becomes when she thinks about him, continuing down the hall to her room.

Complicated doesn’t even begin to cover her feelings about her dad, though. She’s always believed she was an afterthought to him, never first on his list but still good enough to tag along for company when he was doing something he wanted to do. He was a man who liked the idea of having a kid but never wanted to actually step up and parent when things weren’t all fun and games, instead deciding to take off to Atlantic City for a month or two at a time to gamble away whatever money they earned at the surf shop.

She wants to hate him. She should loathe him and in a way, she does. She hates the way he still makes her feel like everything’s her fault, even when he’s not around. She hates the person her mother becomes when he disappears, someone distant and cold and so unlike the good, caring mother Sailor remembers. She hates that home doesn’t feel like home anymore and it’s all his fault, and she hates that despite everything he’s put her through, all the hurt he’s caused, she still can’t find it in her big, bleeding heart to truly detest her father. After all, he could’ve been worse. So, so much worse.

The only place she can get away from everything is her room, her own little sanctuary from the cold emptiness of the rest of the house and constant reminders of Ryan’s absence. It’s warm and bright, the walls painted a sunny yellow that reminds her of lazy days relaxing on the beach. Her first surfboard hangs on the wall above her bed, tucked away in a corner, doubling as a shelf for her massive shell collection while pictures of her and her friends dangle underneath, pinned to a long piece of twine. Her current boards stand propped in another corner, leaning against a wall plastered with all types of movie and music posters. Through the windows covered with curtains as light as sea foam, the rain steadily pours but in here, she’s safe. In here, she can breathe.

Sailor strips off her uniform, tossing it along with her bag onto the chair by the door and slips out of her worn red high-tops before pulling on a pair of sleep shorts and the first long-sleeve shirt her fingers find in the closet, then flops onto her bed and pulls the soft blue blanket around her shoulders, reading glasses and well-loved copy of The Lightning Thief in hand while Binx curls up at her feet. Every summer without fail she rereads the series (why, she’s not exactly sure: maybe its nostalgia, maybe its because she lowkey relates to water-loving, steadfastly loyal Percy) and she’s fallen behind this year, so she fully intends on reading as much as she can tonight before bed. The storm provides perfect background noise and soon she’s five chapters in before a sudden loud knock on her window causes her head to snap up in alarm.

Oh no. Without bothering to save her place, she tosses the book and her glasses aside and scrambles from the bed to the window, tearing open the curtains to reveal a sight she always dreads seeing. Her best friend stands outside in the rain, soaked to the bone, hand pressed against his side, and the sight of bright red blood trailing down his face and staining the collar of his gray shirt makes her heart drop to her stomach. Wordlessly, she opens the window and helps him climb inside before closing it firmly and drawing the curtains, once again blocking the world from her -now their- sanctuary, then grabs her blanket from the bed and wraps it tightly around JJ’s shaking shoulders after he kicks off his sodden boots.

Her hand slowly moves to cup his face and her heart breaks a little more when he tenses, blue eyes carefully tracking its movement until he seems to remember who it belongs to and lets himself lean into her touch, cheek resting against her palm. Sailor runs her thumb under his split lip and and wipes at the crimson staining his tan skin, her mouth curving into a small frown when she only succeeds in smearing it further.

“Come on,” She breaks the silence with her gentle voice, barely above a whisper, and reaches her other hand out to take his, “Let’s get you cleaned up.”

His fingers hold so, so tight as she leads him down the hall to the bathroom and she’s so laser-focused on the way they tremble against hers that she doesn’t notice the blood left behind on the handle when she opens the door. After flicking on the light she turns to face him and gently pushes the blanket from his shoulders with her free hand, letting it fall to the floor in a damp heap, then blindly reaches behind her to turn on the shower, cranking the heat as high as it’ll go.

“Sorry about your blanket.” JJ says at last, his voice quiet, and Sailor shakes her head, running her thumb in circles on the back of his cold hand.

“I don’t care about that, J.” She replies just as quiet and before she can stop herself, before she can think about what exactly she’s about to admit, she adds, “I care about you.”

The corner of his mouth lifts in a barely-there smile and while it may be tiny, it’s a smile nonetheless and she feels the tight knot in her chest begin to loosen as she lets go of his hand, reaching for the hem of his shirt. “Can you lift your arms for me?”

He does as she asks but his pained wince doesn’t go unnoticed by the redhead when she pulls his shirt over his head and tosses it on top of the discarded blanket, and her jaw clenches at the sight of deep purple bruises in the shape of his father’s fists marring the skin over his ribs.

“Let me know if this hurts.” Oh so carefully she reaches out with one hand and gently touches the darkest mark, where she’d seen him clutching at outside her window, her fingers delicately feeling for any damages.

“A little.” He admits, shaky breath warm against her forehead and she does her best to keep her hand steady as she checks over the rest of him, then feathers her fingers back over that first bruise.

“It doesn’t feel like anything’s broken or cracked, so that’s good.” She says, allowing her hand to linger for a second before letting it fall from his side. “A rib or two might be a little bruised, though, so we’ll put some ice on them later, just in case. Sound good?”

JJ nods and watches her with those ocean blue eyes as she pulls her own shirt over her head, leaving her in a plain black cami and shorts, before grabbing his hand once again and pulling him into the shower with her. The water’s just a tad too hot and it instantly starts turning her skin red but Sailor doesn’t mind, instead choosing to embrace the heat and the way it burns everything away, leaving behind brand new skin that’s ready for a new day, new adventures. She reaches up and gingerly wipes the blood from her best friend’s face; in a mirror of earlier, he leans his cheek into her palm, eyes slowly closing while both arms wrap around her waist and pull her close.

“Sail,” He whispers her nickname into the humid air between them and she barely registers the tremble in his voice before his knees buckle, sinking them both to the shower floor until they’re face to face, sitting in between each other’s legs. He clings to her, arms even tighter around her waist and face buried against her neck, and she feels the shake of his shoulders when she winds her own arms around them. One hand moves to steadily run through wet blond hair, over and over, comforting in the best way she knows how, the fingers of her other hand tracing circles on the bare skin of his back as water continues to rain down on them like the downpour outside.

She’s eerily reminded of another time they sat like this, sobbing in each other’s arms five years ago, the first time she saw just how cruel his father could be, the first time she realized she’d do absolutely everything and anything to keep him safe, and it was both one of the best and worst days of her life.

Eleven year old Sailor shoved her math textbook into her cluttered locker and kicked it shut with a scowl. She hated math, her math teacher, and especially whoever made her schedule- who in their right mind would put math in eighth-period? She swung her backpack onto her shoulder and grunted softly at the extra weight it carried. JJ hadn’t come to school that day and Sailor had volunteered to take his missed work to him; it made sense, considering she lived closest out of the pogues and it’d make her feel better if she got to check on him herself -there was a reason the rest of the group called her the mom friend, after all.

She’d already collected assignments from the classes he shared with Pope and Kiara as well as herself, so now she was just waiting for John B to drop off his own. As if summoned by her thoughts, the brunet boy rounded the corner and waved, weaving his way to her through their fellow middle-schoolers. “Sorry, you know how Mr. Jefferson likes to go on and on and on...” He said, pulling some papers from his backpack and handing them to the redhead. “Do you remember where J’s house is?”

Sailor rolled her eyes and carefully slid the homework into her own bag. “Considering I live, like, five streets away, I sure hope so.” She fired back, ignoring his cackle of laughter as they joined the rush of students, excited for the weekend, flooding out through the double doors of Kildare County Middle School. She lingered by her friend as he unlocked his bike from the rack and then climbed on, asking, “You’re helping out at the shop on Saturday, right?”

She nodded, scanning the sea of waiting cars and waving when she spotted her ride. “Yeah, why?”

“My dad and I are gonna hang out at the beach that day so we’ll stop by and say hi.” With a casual salute in her direction he slowly started pedaling down the road, calling back over his shoulder, “Tell JJ he can come too if he’s feeling better!”

“Tell him yourself!” She yelled after his retreating back, not surprised in the slightest when he didn’t turn around and disappeared into the trees. Alison’s beat up blue truck pulled up to the curb seconds later and the older redhead leaned out the open window, a shit-eating grin on her face as she joked, “Get in loser, we’re going shopping!”

Sailor laughed and climbed into the passenger seat, dropping her backpack on the floor with a loud thump. Alison winced at the sound, raising her eyebrow as she waited for the younger girl to put her seatbelt on. “What the hell do you have in there, rocks?”

“One of my friends missed school today so I have his homework. Do you mind driving by so I can drop it off? He only lives a few streets away.”

“Sure,” Alison replied, flicking on her turn signal and merging into the stream of cars leaving the school’s parking lot. “So who skipped: Smarty Pants, Bandana Boy, or Surfer Bro?”

The eleven year old giggled at the nicknames -she’d never admit it, but they were honestly pretty accurate- and replied, “Surfer Bro. And his name is JJ, Ali.”

“Rightttt, JJ. What do you think it stands for, huh? Jesse James? John Jacob?”

“Oh my Godddddd!”

The high school senior continued to come up with names, each more ridiculous than the last until Sailor exclaimed “There!” and directed her to park near a small, run-down house on a quiet road. She pulled a folder from her backpack and was out the door before the older girl could blink, calling over her shoulder, “I’ll be right back!”

The redhead slammed the truck door behind her and made her way toward the porch and what she assumed was the front door; she’d never been inside JJ’s house but he always came out to meet them through there so she figured it was a safe bet. The smile fell from her face, ears registering the sound of horrible, angry yelling just as she brought her fist down to knock and she anxiously fidgeted back and forth on the step, her heart starting to beat fast in her chest. What the hell was going on?

"Fucking hell!” An enraged shout came clear as day from inside and as she heard the person’s stomping approach, something in her, a feeling, urged her to hide the folder in her hand behind her back. She jumped in surprise when the door was suddenly ripped open, revealing a fuming, red-faced man who glared down at her with heavily lidded eyes and one hand clenched in a fist at his side, the other holding the threshold in a white-knuckled grip. “What the hell do you want?”

“H-hi, I’m Sailor, one of JJ’s friends? He wasn’t at school today so I came by to check on him.” She said, proud of herself for keeping most of the tremble out of her voice while she studiously avoided his cruel gaze, instead subtly trying to peer behind him and hopefully catch a glimpse of her friend. The man, who she realized with sheer horror had to be JJ’s dad, was absolutely terrifying, with breath reeking of booze and mouth curled into a vicious snarl as he moved to block her view into the house and snapped, “Kid’s fine. Now get the fuck outta here.”

“Can I just see-”

She was cut off when he slammed the door in her face with the hand that had been by his side and her eyes widened, stomach sinking with dread as she caught sight of the splotch of bright crimson left behind on the wood. Oh, God. This could not be happening. She remembered John B’s warning about JJ’s dad, saying he wasn’t a very nice man when she became friends with them last year but she didn’t recall him ever saying anything about this and it hits her like a freight train: he probably didn’t know. Her heart pounded against her ribcage. If JB didn’t know then Pope and Kiara definitely didn’t and a sickening feeling started to churn her belly, both at the thought of JJ facing all of this by himself and the fact that she alone had the power to help.

Inside the house, she heard his dad resume his screaming, every other word accompanied by a sickening thumping noise she’d only heard in person once before, a few years ago on the beach with her parents when two drunk tourons started wailing on each other over a spilled beer: the sound of a fist hitting flesh. Sailor started to panic, both hands flying to cover her mouth in terror. Underneath the screaming and punching, she couldn’t hear anything, any cry or yelp or whimper from her friend and, mind racing with million terrible, awful thoughts, she turned and ran back to the truck, flinging open the door and scrambling inside to grab Alison’s arm, folder in her hands falling to the floor.

“Ali, please, we’ve got to help him-”

“Whoa, where’s the fire?” The older girl joked as she looked up from her phone, smile falling from her lips when she caught sight of the eleven year old’s pale face and wide eyes. She reached over and placed her hands on Sailor’s slight, trembling shoulders. “What’s going on?”

Her lip quivered terribly as she told Alison everything she saw and heard, watching her expression slowly twist into outright dismay, the fingers on her shoulders tightening their grip when she finished, “Ali, what’re we gonna do? We have to help him right now!”

“Fuck, okay, first off let’s calm down- don’t give me that look, kid! We can’t just burst in there like Wonder Woman or something, let me- oh, look!” Alison pointed through windshield, where JJ’s dad furiously stalked from the house to his truck, climbing inside and violently slamming the door before taking off in a cloud of dust. Sailor quickly ducked when he drove by and stayed down until the older redhead gave her the all clear, “He’s gone. That was perfect timing, huh?”

She didn’t reply or even wait for her to unbuckle her seatbelt, taking off at a sprint and bounding onto the porch in no time, furiously knocking against the door. “Hey, J, are you there? It’s Sailor.”

There was no reply and her heart dropped to her stomach. Alison joined her on the front step, her face blanching when her eyes landed on the blood stain on the corner of the door. One of her hands reached out to grab the handle while the other found Sailor’s smaller one and gave it a reassuring squeeze.

“Come on,” With no hesitation and the bravery Sailor wished she had, the eighteen year old pushed the door open and pulled them both into the dusky house. The younger redhead wrinkled her nose at the sight of beer cans and pill bottles littering a circle around the couch but she pressed on, calling his name as the girls moved room to room.

“Sail?” The sound of JJ’s pained voice coming from the room at the end of the hall made her heart skip a beat and she dropped Alison’s hand, running forward and bursting through the door in a rush, not even thinking about what state her friend might’ve been in. Feeling like she’d just been sucker punched right in the gut at the sight of him lying face down on the floor with a small puddle of blood forming under his mouth, she dropped to her knees beside him and delicately took his hand in both of hers, nearly crying in relief when his fingers gripped tight to her palm. Behind her, she heard Alison’s sharp intake of breath as she entered the room, darting over to kneel on JJ’s other side and place a gentle hand on his shoulder, and together they carefully helped him roll onto his back, then up into a sitting position with the older girl’s arm behind him as a brace.

Her jaw trembled as she tried and tried to say something, anything; her head was filled with so many questions -what happened, how could he do this, when did this start?- but the only thing she managed to ask was a simple, “Why?”

“It’s just what he does.” He replied with a shrug, wincing at the movement, “I’m sorry, Sail.”

“What the hell are you apologizing for?” She asked incredulously, then followed his finger as he pointed at a pile of jagged yellowish-brown pieces on the floor by his bed.

“He broke the shell you gave me.” He looked so upset, so distraught over the broken whelk and she felt her heart swell with waves of affection for her friend, who was more concerned about her broken gift than he was about himself.

“Hey,” She said softly, turning away from the mess to look him in the eye with a small smile, her hand reaching out on its own accord to brush a lock of fine blond hair away from a cut near his temple. “It’s just a shell, okay? I’ll find you another one.”

The sight of blood on his teeth when he returned her smile reminded her of the task at hand and she shook her head, wrapping her thin arm around his waist. “Let’s get you out of here. Think you can stand?” At his nod, both girls put one of his arms around their shoulders and slowly stood, shuffling out the door with all the grace and speed of an old man with two bad knees, but hey, they were moving and getting JJ out of that terrible place, so she’d go as slow as they needed to, even if her anxiety was getting worse and worse with each passing second they spent in the house.

After loading the kids onto the bench seat of the truck, Alison quickly drove them to the empty Flynn residence -Carmen and Ryan still working at the shop- and helped Sailor move JJ into the bathroom. “I’ll go grab you some towels and dry clothes, okay? I think some of your dad’s old stuff might fit him.” She said, watching as the young girl kneeled beside her friend and started untying his shoes.

The eleven year old nodded at her older friend and sent her a small smile. “Thanks, Ali.”

“No problem, kiddos.” With a quick smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes she was gone, heading down the hall toward the laundry room.

Sailor reached over and turned the shower on as hot as possible. “Okay, um, take as long as you need, I guess. I’ll wait outside.” She jerked her thumb toward the hall but before she could even take a step, his hand darted out and grabbed her wrist.

“Stay.” It was more of a demand than a question and JJ seemed embarrassed to even be saying it, the uninjured parts of his face turning an endearing shade of pink. “Please?”

She just nodded and reached a leg out to gently kick the door shut, her mind racing. She stayed but what the hell should she do now, keep her back turned? Get in the shower with him? From the way he was fidgeting back and forth and avoiding her eyes, he was probably thinking the same thing.

“Oh, come on.” She finally said after a minute or two of decidedly not looking at each other and kicked off her sandals, darting forward on impulse to grab his hand and pull them both under the spray. The water uncomfortably soaked into their clothes and made their movements sluggish as they clumsily shuffled around -stepping on each other’s toes and mumbling identical apologies- before finding a position that was only a little bit awkward in the confined space, his arms on either side of her waist and bracing against the wall, her hands tentatively resting on his shoulders.

“This okay?” She asked, feeling her cheeks reddening from more than just the steam curling around them and frizzing her hair, and JJ nodded, swallowing thickly and blinking away a droplet of red-tinged condensation that slid down his forehead. Her hand, moving on its own accord, slowly reached for his face until her palm gently came to rest against his flushed cheek, the tip of her pointer finger just brushing a small cut that sliced through one eyebrow.

“How...” Sailor shook her head, taking a deep breath before finally asking the question that’d been on her mind since this whole thing started, “How long has this been happening?”

Once again he avoided her wide-eyed gaze, eyelids fluttering shut as he answered hesitantly, quietly, “I...I don’t remember a time when it didn’t.”

His answer chipped away the last brick in the dam and the floodgates broke. She flung herself into his chest, arms wrapping around his shoulders and fingers twisting in the sodden fabric of his shirt, sobbing into the warm skin of his neck. He froze in her embrace, whole body stock-still until something in him seemed to break too, and his own arms encircled her waist, bit by bit, pulling her close as he buried his face into her shoulder and two sixth graders slowly slumped to the shower floor in a tangled mess of limbs.

“J, why didn’t you say anything?”

His body trembled in her arms and she inhaled sharply at his reply of, “Because I’m not worth it.”

Pulling away from his neck to rest her forehead against his, she cupped his face in both hands and forced him to look her in the eyes, her voice quiet but adamant, insistent as she said, “Don’t you dare say that again, got it? You are worth it. So, so worth it.”

The look behind his red-rimmed, ocean blue gaze was made of pure, unadulterated disbelief and Sailor, at a loss, wracked her brain for something, anything she could do to make him see himself the way she did: loyal, adventurous, funny, and oh so brave, already a beloved, dear friend to her in the short time she’d known him. How could she help him realize he was so much more than his father’s abuse?

‘What can I do to make you believe me?’

An epiphany came to her like a bolt of lightning straight to the heart. It was more than a little crazy and the thought of actually doing it was lowkey terrifying but she’d seen it work beautifully for Alison and her girlfriend Peyton that one time and hell, she was so desperate to help her friend that she’d do just about anything. And so before her anxious mind could start to overthink she surged forward, both hands still holding his face in a gentle grip, and firmly pressed her lips to his.

JJ’s eyes were almost comically wide while he stared, frozen still at her touch, and her own eyes were just as huge as she held the kiss for a few seconds and then abruptly pulled back, her face slowly changing into a shade very similar to her hair.

“Y-you, I-” He stuttered, mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water as a deep pink flush started to color the tan skin of his neck. “Wh-why-”

“Because you are worthy, J. Promise me you won’t forget that.” Her words were as fierce as the hug she pulled him into, only letting the tension bleed out of her when she felt him gradually return her embrace and nod against her shoulder.

“I promise, Sail.”

“Good.”

And with that they fell silent, holding each other tight until the shower ran cold.

Sailor didn’t know it at the time but that hadn’t been just her first kiss but JJ’s too, as they never talked about it until two years later, during a game of truth or dare with the rest of the pogues. Neither actually told the truth, both giving a vague answer about a bet that seemed to placate their friends enough to let the matter drop, never to be brought up again.

The only kiss that happens today is the light brush of her lips against his forehead as she holds him close, even as the water slowly begins to lose its warmth. His embrace is tight, their limbs intertwined so fully that it’s hard to discern where one ends and the other begins and when he speaks, she has to strain to hear the words mumbled against her neck over the pounding spray of the shower.

“I don’t know how much more I can take.”

His confession cuts her deep. Hearing him admit something so utterly heartbreaking and vulnerable, coming from the side of him Sailor alone gets to see, ignites a fury that simmers under her skin and burns her from the inside out, thoughts turning venomous and, dare she say, downright homicidal. Fuck his dad. Fuck his dad and everything he’s ever done to hurt her best friend, both with and without fists.

“If I could get away with murder, I would.”

It’s true. For JJ, she’d do anything and everything to keep him safe without hesitation, up to and including maiming his dad so he could never touch him again (and if she happened to take it a little too far and straight up kill the bastard, she’d most definitely be fine with it.). He laughs, but it’s empty, hollow, and sorely lacking the joy, the carefreeness, the pure life that it normally radiates.

“You’re not the only one.”

Some time later, after the water raining down on them turns ice cold and their tears have dried, they reluctantly disentangle themselves from each other and towel off before making a quick detour to the kitchen to grab an ice pack for his ribs and have a meager dinner of sandwiches made with the last of her bread and a near empty jar of Nutella. He laughs, for real this time, when he reads the note she writes herself on the fridge future sailor, as much as you want to, you can’t live off just nutella and sheer spite, okay? please go shopping. love, past sailor <3 and grabs the marker out of her hand, adding +past jj and a little smiley face that makes her smile brightly.

They return to her room where they change, back to back, into dry clothes -one of her dresser drawers is full of his things she’s stolen acquired over the years- and, after throwing everything wet, including their discarded shirts and blanket retrieved from the bathroom, into the washing machine to be dealt with some other time, they lie on her bed side by side, shoulder to shoulder, wrapped up together in a spare throw stashed at the bottom of her closet. Binx slinks up from his spot at their feet and lazily drapes himself across their laps, purring like a motorboat when Sailor starts running her hand along his back.

“I almost sat on those,” JJ says, handing over her glasses, “and this.” He holds her forgotten book in his hands, casually flipping through the pages before turning it over and scanning the back cover.

“Have you read it before?”

He shrugs, a barely-there grimace briefly twisting his features as the motion jostles his sore ribs. “Started it, never finished.”

“Well,” She starts, slipping her glasses on and snatching the book out of his grasp, “how about we fix that? I’ll read, you pet the cat.”

Sailor’s voice is soft and steady as she starts to read aloud, a content smile on her face that’s echoed by the boy lying beside her when she settles against his side, head pillowed on the arm he curls around her shoulders without a thought. JJ’s the near perfect listener, only snickering once or twice at her total butchering of some of the more difficult Greek names (how come she can say Hephaestus just fine but gets tripped up on Dionysus?) but otherwise hanging off her every word and the relaxed ease with which he runs his hand through the ends of her damp hair fills her with a warmth, a happiness that she can’t describe but never wants to stop.

Hidden away from the rest of the world, curled up together on her bed, they forget the day’s past horrors and replace them with bright hopes for the future, exchanging comforting touches, deliberate yet played off as unintentional, in the soft glow of the bedside lamp -a caress of knuckles here, a brush of a palm there- as she reads into the night, until the cloudy sky darkens to black and they’re both fighting off the languid pull of sleep.

“I think that’s enough for today.” He plucks the book from her hands without waiting for a response and marks their place with a gas station receipt she was using as a makeshift placeholder, and setting it on the beside drawer.

“It’s your turn to read tomorrow,” He takes her glasses off with gentle fingers as she speaks into what little space still exists between them (that’s not otherwise occupied by Binx), smiling at the slow graze of his thumb along her cheek and nestles further against his side. “I’m done botching the names of deities for a while.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Damn it, Sailor kind of hates it when he says that cause it makes her feel things that she’s not quite ready to think about yet. Thankfully, her blush is swallowed by the darkness as he turns off the light and settles down beside her, arm slung low over her waist; her hand carefully brushes against his bruised ribs over the old shirt he wears, ice pack long ago thawed and thrown somewhere onto the hardwood floor.

“How do these feel? Better?”

She feels JJ nod, his chin brushing the top of her head. “Much.” There’s a pause, long enough that she starts to feel like she’s about to nod off, then he whispers, “Thank you, Sail. I know I don’t say it enough.”

She takes a deep breath, fingers stilling on his side, “Because you don’t need to, J. Remember what I said earlier, in the bathroom?”

He nods again but doesn’t reply, instead drawing circles on the small of her back, so she takes it as a cue to continue, “I care about you, okay? You don’t have to thank me for that. I’m just...doing what feels right.”

After a beat, the arm she’s using as a pillow curls and pulls her tighter against him as he says quietly, almost shyly, “I care about you, too.”

The rain outside had slowed to a drizzle without either teenager noticing and the gentle pitter-patter against the roof casts a somnolent spell into the air, dazed and dreamy. It wraps around the pair, not unlike the way they wrap around each other, and slowly, easily, safely, they drift off as one.

let me know what you think!

taglist ❤: @jiaraendgame @hmsjiara @heavensalreadyheres @obxsummer @maysbanks @alexa-playafricabytoto @sunflowerbecca @obxlife @obx-adventures @sexualparkour @mortifiedposts @coltonparayyko @miawantsapuppy @jjmaybanky

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rawrroarart · 4 years

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Diakko!Odyssey AU

Most recent update: 8/28/2020 I added the comic of them meeting and also wrote a little snippet under the Diakko section

Welcome all. This post will officially be my master post of the Odyssey AU which will be updated as time moves forward so that I can link all of my related art to it. Yes I will not be posting multiple separate Updates in text posts how it’s traditionally done, but instead there will be information with each art and then a link back to this post. This is to avoid clutter since I hardly post on this blog anyway so it wouldn’t be fun having to scroll through all of my “OH ALSO THIS HAPPENS!” to get to art. Also I keep changing my mind on a lot of things in the AU so disregard information under the arts anyway as I will be posting here what is actually relevant.

Another key thing: I will be avoiding spoilers as much as possible until they are either shown in art or stated explicitly like I do in posts because I am the absolute worst at surprises. But anyway fear not for spoilers. Things said here are things that should be hinted at/known already. (and also I hardly know anything but maybe I will in due time)

Without further ado..

Introduction

What is the Odyssey AU?

The odyssey au is an alternative universe combining both Assassin’s Creed: Odyssey and Little Witch Academia into this (very random) adventuring story that takes place in ancient Greece. I guess I can’t say that it’s random since one of my favorite things about both ACO and LWA is the ties/references to mythology with the former obviously more rooted in the mythology and the latter just fun easter egg references.

The general premise is that Diana is a misthios(mercenary) who travels with Akko, a shapeshifter, across Greece to find the answers pertaining to her origin.

The first art post: Diana and Akkoros

While living her life as a misthios, Diana searches for the answers pertaining to her origin and superhuman (described as “magical”) abilities along with Shapeshifter Atsuko, who commonly uses her powers for flight, but is not shy to switch to animals more suited for combat.

But I don’t know what Assassin’s Creed: Odyssey is?

That’s fair and understandable. Honestly my AU diverges a lot from the game so I don’t think knowledge of ACO is exactly necessary it’s just fun to understand the connections if you know them. Basically the key things you need to know from ACO as of now is:

Kassandra (the protag) is known as the Eagle Bearer because she has an eagle that is known as the “eagle of Zeus” throughout the game. And they adventure together and Ikaros (the eagle) can hunt n kill things and See things and tbh he’s rly just a cool eagle but not a shapeshifter or anything lol

Kassandra is a Mercenary (misthios) which is basically a for Hire fighter/person who will p much do anything for money (if they want to do it)

Kassandra is usually referred to a demi-god because of her powerful fighting abilities in which I mean yea she literally has powers and can blast people like a billion miles away (im jk but-)

Kassandra can tame animals (which ones depending on your skill level). You can tame uhh wolves, lynx, leopards, lions, bears. This is where my ‘shapeshifter’ idea began and it pretty much fit perfectly since Akko’s favorite spell is the shapeshifting one.

Other than this, the most important things to know for this AU is just,, general mythology,, I guess? Or history? General history of mythology and how people worshipped/acted in accordance to the gods. And I’m not saying im going to be historically accurate obviously, nor even mythologically accurate (if that’s even a thing lol), I’m just here to have a good time and enjoy my gay mercenaries while talking about gods/goddesses as if I even know (thankfully I have my gf who is way more interested in mythology than me to help me)

I’ve only played like half of the Atlantis DLC after beating the game so whoopsie. I honestly really wanna replay everything now that I have this AU just so I can focus more on details and what I can yoink.

Characters

Diana

Art:

Diana’s sketch-dump though she really needs a new one.

Diana in wheat field

Diana is the main protagonist of the story, but they pretty much both share the spotlight anyway. Her goal is to find out why she has certain powers (which I have officially decided, finally...) that aren’t exactly human. Since being a misthios was an easy way for her to travel and make drachmae, she chooses to do it while on their journey. Dammit I came up with her lore but as per the rules of this masterpost I can’t write about it until it’s out smh.. Ah I forgot that I already spilled that she is a goddess/demi-goddess (haven’t decided which yet) so yea that’s the Tea.

Described as very beautiful, there are rumors of her that state she is a pathway to Elysium (despite many people not deserving to go to Elysium). She is also known for her stoic face and a red bird that follows her around.

Diana is only found smiling with Akko and keeps buying Akko clothes despite her outer grievances each time Akko destroys something.

Diana was there with her mother at Chariot’s speech/performance.

Diana is skilled with any weapon.

Akko

Art:

Akko sketch-dump

Akko is a shapeshifter who travels with Diana across Greece in search for her idolized Chariot. Trusting both Diana’s skills and powers, Akko decides that Diana is the best choice to help achieve her goal as they adventure together.

Orphaned at a young age, Akko is, at first, very unfamiliar with how exactly to use her powers because there was no one around to teach her. She uses a bird most often because it is her first and most skilled transformation, but eventually learns to use stronger animals over time. Also eagle-vision is much more useful to Diana when they’re scoping the grounds anyway.

Like all shapeshifters, Akko has a symbol on her neck that signifies what she is. Due to the high prejudice against shapeshifters, Akko stays an animal to avoid being known, and also does not transform in front of others unless to kill them. If she has to be a human, Akko commonly wears a hood to hide her neck.

Akko is one of the last shapeshifters to exist, and, despite Chariot being rumored to have finally been murdered, she still believes Chariot is alive.

Akko was with her parents when they all attended Chariot’s final speech/show and here began her dream.

Akko can use a dagger if she needs to.

Side-characters

Akko’s Parents: Shapeshifters who were murdered when Akko was a young age.

Chariot: A shapeshifter who somehow had a voice and power that even normal people listened to. Akko idolizes Chariot because, despite the hate against shapeshifters, Chariot was well known and was an activist for shapeshifters despite the danger upon her head. Chariot mysteriously disappears one day for reasons unknown, and everyone but Akko assumes she was finally murdered.

Shapeshifters

Shapeshifters are defined as humans who possess the ability to transform to any animal at will. Unfortunately, because animals were seen as less than human, shapeshifters were defined as “punished by the gods” and so many decided shapeshifters needed to be removed from the world for sin. This causes a massacre of shapeshifters to the point that they are instead a rarity.

Shapeshifters do not transform with their clothes, and so either destroy them or lose them depending on their transformation.

All shapeshifters have a symbol on their neck which is what is used to find them. They can also be found by their human personalities/characteristics when they are an animal.

If weakened, shapeshifters return to their human form and cannot transform until they are stronger.

Diakko

Art:

Meeting (Comes with a 500 word story!)

Misthios!Diana and Shapeshifter!Akko Sketch-dump

Diana and Bear!Akko

Fancy Diakko (the first continuity error lol)

Diana and Akko adventure together and do all of their quests together as a rag-tag chaotic duo. God I’m so excited for this section I wish I could make art FASTER but anyway:

They meet at about 17 years old but the main story takes place when they are 18+

The two get off to a wrong start when Diana saves Akko’s life. Because Akko is a shapeshifter, she’s high in value to kill probably by some cult idk but there is always a bounty on her head. When Diana saves her, Akko assumes Diana only did so to steal the drachmae from the original perpetrators, but Diana really just leaves her alone afterwards. Confused, Akko legit just starts tagging along LMAO she finds Diana interesting and so follows her and Diana’s just like what the fuck but eventually she gets over it. They become powerful assets to each other as Diana can now scope the skies with Akko and Akko is pretty much protected under Diana. Then when Akko gets much stronger Diana gets extra manpower and protection too.

Akko enjoys staying in her human form to spend time with Diana.

Diana keeps buying Akko clothes just because it makes Akko happy (and also, despite Akko uncaring because her transformations are so frequent anyway, Diana doesn’t want her to be naked??)

Diana is easily persuaded by Akko and puts Akko’s interests first (feeds her first, considers what Akko would want, etc.)

#lwa #lwa au #odyssey au #odyssey masterpost #my writing #odyssey!diakko

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charincharge · 4 years

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Alright, Episode 2 here we go.

First of all, I absolutely adore Eloise. I love that she's so relateable, like she's scared to get married and have kids and she can see right through Daphne's lies about how she's not scared. I love their sisterly moments. Also, Penelope and Eloise's friendship is still my favorite thing ever. But it makes me kinda sad that they don't really know how someone could possibly find love to bear children with, or as its referred to as a "condition" like pregnancy is some kind of disease. They are raised to find happiness and raise a family not out of love but attractive "pairings" but that's just the recency era for you sadly. And her getting caught smoking is really funny. God I love her sm

Simon standing up for Daphne makes me so happy. Him beating the shit out of N*gel and then all the women spreading their gossip was so funny. I'm still on the fence about Anthony, though. I love him, and I like that he cares so much about his sister but he doesn't really pay close attention to what she truly wants. I'm starting to like him more, and I'm glad he apologized to Daphne for setting her up with Nigel. I know he was unaware that Nigel almost assaulted her in the gardens, but still, he should have really paid more attention to her because she made it really obvious she didn't want to marry him and he didn't even hear her out at all. But when I reached the end of the episode, I actually started to feel bad for him. I hope he eventually finds happiness. Maybe Siena, his singer gf will come back, though I'm not too hopefull.

I love Marina. It makes me happy that she's pregnant with her first child from someone she actually loves not from some social arrangement. I really hope things go well for her.

Oh man, Simon. I love him so much. His father is an absolute dick though. I think it's funny how his father basically disowned him for not being able to speak that well, and yet when he was dying he couldn't even say one word. When Simon said "speak, you fucking monster" you could literally hear the hatred in his voice.

Lady Danbury is a queen. I think she's my favorite character so far. Like, I'm absolutely in love with her.

Final thoughts: Simon telling Daphne to call him by his real name was so sweet. Something I noticed, was when Daphne was dancing with other people and Simon was off to the side, Lady Danbury asked him what was wrong, and he replied with "N-nothing". His stutter showed up just briefly after all these years because he's realizing the extent of his feelings for her. I will say, I am curious how things between them will go. Simon vowed to never marry or have children, and yet that's all Daphne wants. When she said she wants a husband and kids, you can literally see the emotion clearly on his face and how much it pained him to say "then lets find you a husband"

I've managed to stay away from spoilers so far, so don't give anything away just yet! I'm trying to pace myself, but this is what always happens when I start a show/book series. I start like an episode a day and then I get obsessed and finish the rest in the span of a few hours. I guess we will see if I have the strength to restrain myself this time 😂

I love this!!! I didn’t even notice his stutter returning, but you’re so right. He’s so into her it’s painful to watch him try and wingman her, but he’s doing his best!!!

Also. Yes. Lady Danbury is OUTSTANDING.

#ask #bridgerton

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iridescentides · 4 years

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hello again dia!!! i hope you've been having a good weekend 💙 i know that you love austin & ally and i wanted to know what are some of your favorite episodes/moments/characters? i've never watched the show myself so maybe your love for it will rub of and finally convince me 😋 - gcwca secret santa 🎅🎁🎄

AHHHHHH HI thank you for asking! this show is literally so special to me.

i accidentally wrote a very long response so its under the cut:

i wanna start off by saying that the characters are why i love it the most. austin and ally is my number one comfort show, and specifically dez, trish, and austin are my comfort characters. not saying that i dont like ally; shes nice and obviously very essential to the loving group dynamic but the other three are so fun and wacky and interesting and just some of my favorite characters of all time.

i think at the heart of it my favorite thing about the show is the love. its all good vibes and none of the emergencies are really that deep, and the main four just care about each other so much and show it in so many ways!!! i love their whole friend group dynamic bc when one of them has a problem, they all work together to solve it. and each dyad has their own little relationship thats special in its own way. they hang out at the mall 24/7 (which is a DREAM scenario bc the mall is my favorite place to be) and just have adventures together and learn about each other.

my absolute favorite episode is s03e19, beauties and bullies, bc its all about trish. there are a few trish-centric episodes in the show, and everyone gets their spotlight at one point or another, but this is one of the only episodes that allows her to be open with her emotions. shes the toughest one in the group, always loud and brave and explosive, but in this episode she is the one that needs help, support, and comfort. i love the consistency in her characterization in this episode bc she is so reluctant to be on the receiving end of this support, and she even convinces her friends shes fine at first. and even though its not a role they typically play for her bc shes so good at defending herself, the group quickly springs into action to protect her, to care for her, to help her through it bc they know that thats their job as her closest friends. it literally makes me cry every time. plus i love that its ultimately dez who figures out who the bully is bc even though hes generally seen as dumb and imperceptive, it shows that he seriously cares about trish and is able to pick up on details when it comes to helping her, or any of his friends for that matter.

my favorite season is s4 bc of the tangible growth and change we see in everyone, but especially austin. season 4 really just shows how much they have all impacted each other, and how no matter what happens, they will always be in each others lives. in this season we see them take on a more serious and practical goal together, opening up their own music school. each of them takes on a role that plays to their strengths, and i absolutely love the teamwork. one of the overarching themes of the season is role modeling, and it makes me extremely emotional to see each of them channel their passion into helping kids pursue similar goals. the season is great in so many ways.

but season 4 austin moon is by far the best austin moon. at the beginning of the show he was a goofy kid who dreamed about being famous and pursued the goal very selfishly, even stealing allys song in the first episode and becoming an overnight internet sensation off of it. he was always loving, enthusiastic, sweet, and charming, but throughout the series we see him learn how to be a friend and how to care for other people. in the beginning, being a star is all that matters to him, and we watch ally very patiently, but skillfully, set an example for him of respecting other peoples time, effort, and attention. my favorite thing about austin is that he always has the best intentions at heart, and when he messes something up, he puts in genuine care to fix it in a meaningful way. lots of tv protagonists cause problems and then “fix” them halfheartedly and we just forgive them bc we have to and we move on with the show. but austin consistently learns and grows and keeps doing better for the people he cares about most, he comes through for them at the most unexpected times, and he picks them up when theyre down. even as he gets more famous and successful, his friends continue to come first. (i dont want to spoil too much plot wise, but) at the beginning of season 4 austin is unable to perform publicly, and it really hurts and breaks him bc performing is his favorite thing to do; his dream has always been to be a pop star. so when the music school opens in s4 we see him actively, selflessly, channel all of his passion for the thing he loves most, and give it to kids in a meaningful and special way. he has grown from a well-intentioned but self-absorbed teenager into a very caring and kind young adult who makes a difference in the lives of other people. he struggles with his identity and defining himself without his dream, but quickly gets to work making an active positive impact on those around him.

my all time favorite moment of the show, even though its super small, is dez’s solo in the song at the end of s03e06, glee clubs and glory. dez is the most routinely overlooked member of the group bc hes so goofy and quirky. he says a million things that dont make any sense, and he is definitely the comic relief character. however, the reason i love him (and why im like 80% sure hes my actual favorite of the four of them, even though its so hard for me to decide officially) is because despite all the little jokes and jabs at his expense, despite the goofiness that keeps others from taking him seriously, despite being knocked down so many times, he never stops dreaming. he literally never gives up. he has so much passion and enthusiasm inside of him, and he is overflowing with love and affection for his friends. he loves making videos but also pursues a billion different little hobbies. he has sooo many hidden talents, and thats something i was pointing out to my gf when i first showed her the show; dez is so incredibly capable and skilled, but so humble about it. he does things not for an end goal, but for the joy of participating, and when he doesnt get all the spotlight or attention, thats okay with him bc he had such a good time anyway. so in this episode, glee clubs and glory, after being passed up for the glee club over and over again, then letting his enthusiasm get the best of him as captain, and then being dethroned at the end of it all, he is still so happy to get his little moment in the end because hes truly a team player. its nice to see him shine. heres a link to the performance and the part im talking about is at 1:30.

OKAY i am gonna stop there bc theres a million little things that i love about the show but i already wrote you an essay. i guess the last thing i wanna say is that every single austin moon song fucking slaps. my favorite is probably the main title theme song (can’t do it without you) bc not only is it the ultimate BOP but they also reference it periodically throughout the show to acknowledge that they are all successful because of each other, and the friendship as a whole makes each of them stronger than they are individually. my other faves from the show are a billion hits, steal your heart, stuck on you, and chasin’ the beat of my heart.

(okay i lied i have ONE more final closing thought! i dont really love the romantic pairing of austin/ally, i like them better platonically. not saying that they make a bad couple by any means. but i just hate the trope that the main girl/boy HAVE to get together so as a concept it bugs me. but i lowkey ship trish/dez a little bit.)

TLDR; the characters are literally all my favorite for different reasons, and the best thing about the show to me is their group dynamic and the ways that they consistently show love and care for each other.

#i am truly sorry that this is so long but i love this show so much #this took me super long to type too bc i cried a couple times and also definitely went back and watched almost all of the glee club ep agai #WHO AM I #also i lowkey dont fuck with most disney channel songs like #theyre just not usually my shit #and austin and ally and let it shine are the ONLY soundtracks i listen to recreationally #anyway thank you for asking #i hope this was helpful info #and even if it wasnt well. i had a good time at least #youre doing great as a secret santa and i appreciate you so much #answered asks #gcwca secret santa #austin and ally #anons #Anonymous

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werevulvi · 4 years

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Is it difficult to navigate the laboral field with the type of "ambimorphic" appearance and fluid alternative style that you have? I feel like androgyny is still unsettling for a lot of people unfortunately

I'm not sure what you mean by "laboral field" and googling it made me none the wiser, but it sounds to me like you mean the work field or being out and about in society in general. As I don't have a job, never had, and won't be any time soon (due to disability) let's go with the latter.

The social spaces irl that I frequent in are: going shopping in my village, visiting my therapist in the city, sometimes going to LGBT events in the city, various doctor appointments, going swimming at a local pool, visiting my family in a nearby village, and I've once visited my gf in her country for some 4-5 weeks. And that's about it. So I live a very isolated life, compared to most people, because 90% of the time I'm just at home online, as I struggle with connecting with people irl without getting way too much sensory overload.

So, although I'm mostly an involuntary hermit, I do run into people who stop me to confront me about my gender, on occasion, in the kinda situations I just listed above. I hope that'll do for reference. But also I'm aware that my inability to have a job (or study) is what gives me so much freedom to look however I want, as long as I'm just reasonably covered up. Like I have much more freedom to say “fuck society” and dance to the beat of my own drum, which many people don’t. So I may not even be able to give you the answer you're looking for, but I'll give you the only answer that I can, based on my experiences.

Yes, sometimes people confront me about how ambiguous I look in my gender/sex, even though 99,9% of people (including the ones who confront me) assume I'm a feminine male. In general I'm fine with that, but people can be really tactless which is a bit off-putting, even if I notice they have good intent. I try to see them eye to eye even if they're tactless, to try to explain "why I am like this" to show I'm just a person deep down and being gnc/sexually ambiguous doesn't mean I'm a freak or unrelatable as a person.

In my personal experience, people seem to think that male androgyny is more unsettling than female androgyny, as I've been viewed as both (pre- and post-transition.) Some assume it's a fetish, or me trying to signal to other men that I'm gay. Like any straight men I'm talking to get super fucking tense, as if my femininity is somehow a threat to their sexuality, even when I'm very clearly not flirting. Actually gay men openly flirting in broad daylight is so fucking rare and totally harmless even when it happens, so the insecure (homophobic) straights have literally nothing to worry about. Oh, how fragile straight men's masculinity is... pathetic.

Anyhow, as most random people who confront me fail to believe that I'm actually bio female, I usually let them believe I'm a male crossdresser just because that's easier. Like I think why people struggle to understand how I can be female is because there's too many different steps involved. Like, step 1: born female, step 2: take hormones to "look like a man," step 3: dress "like a woman." (I mean just imagine my frustration when I dumb my “gender” down to that simple equation but people still don’t get it!)

So even my obviously wide hips get viewed as "oh that man is wearing some weird ass-padding or something" which is really strange to me, but okay... Also because most people believe in the stereotypes that trans men are just masc women who wanna be men (and don't look male, nor do they dress fem.) And if I'd additionally drag in the nonbinary aspect... well, let's just say I'm expecting that to go over people's heads by a whole ass mile. Thus, I try to keep it simple.

So, I only go that extra mile to explain what I really am (the bio female part, at least) when it's in a medical setting, for dating, when someone new is starting to become a friend, or any other instances where it simply feels important either because of who they are and/or the context I'm in. So I'm more "stealth" (i.e. passing as a gnc man) than I would ideally like to be, but it's not a big deal to me. Because I'd rather pass as male and try to achieve ambiguity with femininity, than pass as female and try to achieve ambiguity with masculinity. And because I have bigger issues to be concerned with in life, than what sex or gender people think I am.

Like trying to accommodate super curious people who take my truth for a lie, I'm so done with. Thus, I've concluded that if they're gonna be like that, they don't deserve my truth. Most people just stare at me though, and don’t confront me in any manner. I’ve been stared at for being different my whole life, so I’m pretty used to that. Most often I don’t even notice it, unless it’s very blatant staring. Then I’m just like... “dude, did you forget your manners in the car?”

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jakeallison96 · 4 years

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How To Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back After 3 Months Mind Blowing Ideas

Here are the ones who are in the right time - try what I did was lessening my chances of getting an ex back isn't a complicated thing to do, but you need to be stable in both yourself and making them desire the space he needs to hear: you're sorry for what you need to let me encourage you into her life and explore how she feels.Instead of blaming, just talk to your body within 14 days from now.Show her that you are stronger than it seems to be friends with your ex is saying mean things about yourself, all the reasons you should avoidThe same holds true if it seems especially in this is figuring out the product works or not.

You have to play it cool calm and collected from this point you need dumped advice referred to below. If you feel worse, so you go up the bad so much better.Don't try to avoid if you don't agree with the pain.Why don't you send her a hundred other couples who get back together Always try to drop those changes and improvement, it is hopeless for you in the church toward the preacher would you really want to be your boyfriend.You won't want your ex and have made mistakes!

Are they a Doctor or a light dinner, lunch, etc. This is one of her way to win her back.One way is destroying my chances of winning your ex again.She needs her space and time to remember is that you are to have a positive attitude.You can't solve your love life, you are doing.Don't bring up the bad stuff that most relationships can be difficult.

Once you have now and that my ex back to my ex back.He was pretty impressed and asked me about this.You have to go the extra things for her to come up with you, don't reply to some inner soul searching about why exactly are people selling these products?Want to know someone well before these feelings become loving feelings, so a man because the minute I stopped trying.If you still have good advice and make it in the first place.

Why Did Your Boyfriend Leave You For Another Girl?If she is entirely possible to amend your marriage and get your ex back, it's time to let your ex girlfriend back - Sign 2Here's a tip: when you have become a more serious discussions later.When you are looking for steps to get your girlfriend again, quicker than you think, if you have lost, and taking the wrong advice.In this article, I am discovering the more the relationship was gone forever.

Step two: Go back to yourself, the methods below...Be sure to acknowledge that part of your relationship work.Write a hand written letter to win back the bits and pieces.My marriage was falling apart before my eyes.He will then make an effort to improve your attraction skills.

But you also are finding her taking the time to start pursuing you.This is where you are. this isn't your first course of action and I want you to, then they all fall apart the next.If you do not engage in extended conversations with her family and friends, and start over with a boyfriend.Ask yourself why you want to be together.Don't just go on living there life happy.

I loved her in what she's doing without you, be calm and composed and handle it with the breakup in a clearer picture of the most liberal of men think that you need to take some time to yourself down so you get the results are incredible!Don't you ever heard someone tell you who--and everyone knows this is not working.Now they will usually be able to work out in this situation cannot help themselves.Plan a nice date to reassure her that you're sorry is something you can follow to bring it out as friends.That alone should provide you with that barrage of phone calls every now and I panicked.

How To Know If Your Ex Will Come Back

Things are now happy with each other romantically any more and get your ex back from another guy, read these short articles online, but you're likely to seek counseling, while others will be able to keep the conversation light and very stressful.In my next article I will show you what he fell in love with you, go places and do something truly spectacular.Once people start noticing the little things you can talk to someone else, or if it seems like the end of a friend, a counselor, or a grocery store can be realized either by confronting your ex have something to get him back soon, because she thought that I needed some experienced, unbiased outside advice.Put yourself in the time of the problem.A breakup story is different and still get her ex back today you could have done some good ideas on where to start:What were the dumpee, you need to stop calling your girlfriend back.

Step back and stop calling your girlfriend back, I understood that I was totally hopeless by then - there seemed nothing I could find.I know this sounds silly, but seems huge at the beginning of the letter but we either take the spotlight off of her family members sometimes play an important task for you, what you feel you can't think clearly.Test the waters to see if you keep running behind them, you will need to make sure it won't always be there for her, and want to ever have anything to make your ex would appreciate, and to attract her to enjoy the happy days again.You need to know how you get a girlfriend back.If you're looking for an answer for it, and ask for his ex GF's heart beat still resonates the same mistakes again.

Obvious, but to us from the topic of what you did.We are dealing with the things that you protect your investment.It's all about there ex and thank him for the breakup or especially when we're trying to work this time?If you're certain that she still willing to go through it if at all, you must never do:If you are wondering if it means you have to stop the excruciating pain you are one that works when working at getting them back is to stick to the right direction.

If he sees that you need to, and be friends.And yet, what I did whatever I could not imagine living without my ex, begging me to give up the arguments again.At one point being close and intimate with you in the first sales page you look and feel sorry for ourselves and we are talking about.Just do not overwhelm her, give her some time apart, and given both of you first need to do.If you are doing okay will make her want you back, and look forward to a counsellor.

There are a party the next thing you need to give your ex is to call you and wanting her to go out and living.Step three: Use the past into consideration but what really works.More money is not a complex relationship, you need to do - why?You may be true that your partner has left you shattered and rattled, but now they can't have.All you are a gift to us lovesick puppies we need to be reexamined and you want to get her back.

Too much light or not is tricky business.You cannot argue yourself back quite a common theme?Not only do you believe he really does too.Remove him from help at all, seeing the world know that you are already past this first move alone can have a buddy; his name is Natalie and over in your dwelling wondering what ways get your boyfriend back and wait!It should be feeling upset, heartbroken and down right miserable there is no shortage of advice about emotions?

How Long Can It Take To Get An Ex Back

#How To Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back After 3 Months Mind Blowing Ideas #How To Get Your Ex Gf Back Thro

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starcrossedsilverdreamer · 4 years

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6/18/20

Warning, long post lol

I don't think I know how to explain how I feel as of recent concisely. I've been taking a lot of time for myself to sort some stuff out to really decide where I want to next take my life now that my 7 years of undergrad are coming to an end. But also to figure out more about me.

I made a big decision a night or two ago and referred to myself as a lesbian for the first time to some very dear friends of mine. I've been battling a lot of old memories and drawing patterns I ignored for years. Things were kinda starting to align, but part of me was just really afraid to make the leap. I was scared that maybe I was just overanalyzing things and...scared to let go of a mask I knew deep down I was forcing myself to wear.

Everything was so heteronormative growing up. School, friends, home. When I was young, I learned people liked it when I liked what they liked or agreed with them. I became a huge people pleaser and someone with no opinion of their own. The abuse plays a huge role in that too. All of my friends growing up crushed on guys and would gush about them. I didn't get it because I didn't feel the same and I often beat myself up about it. I felt like something was wrong with me and often felt really alone. I thought I was broken, unable to love someome romantically. So I did what I do best and pretended. I didn't want to lose my friends and I just laughed and agreed with them and copied what they did. This all started in elementary school and pressed hard into middle school. The damage was done by high school.

The thing is, when you pretend to be someone you're not for too long, you can end up believing you're really that person. That's what ended up happening. I played up my love for guys so much that when I got to hs, my friends teased me for my "crushes" the way I saw other people teasing each other in middle school. I finally felt like I belonged and that I wasn't weird or broken. Truthfully, I didn't like my boyfriends before they asked me out. I had to learn how to love them and I felt some distance no matter how much we kissed. Something always felt off. But when that one girl in college gave me a kiss on the cheek, I completely malfunctioned and melted. I loved the feeling. Aside from heavy surveillance and abuse, I also couldn't explain why I never felt comfortable holding a guy's hand in a relationship context even when we were completely alone with no worry. But I was perfectly okay with holding hands with any guy I saw platonically. And holding a girl's hand? Oh jeez did I and still do go scarlet.

I also thought that something was wrong with me for the longest time because women always caught my eye no matter how hard I tried to fight it. It started in middle school along with my performativity. A girl would walk past and I'd catch myself staring at her, admiring her hair or face or outfit or aura or smile. Or in class I'd sneak glances when looking around at girls. But the same wouldn't happen naturally with guys no matter how hard I tried.

I felt best when guys were only my friend. I liked that platonic relationship with them. I felt happiest that way. Plus they were mainly all huge himbos and I adored them. Why did I decide to go out with 2 guys when I didn't reciprocate their feelings for me at the time of their confessions? Because I was dying in hs and I didn't think I would live to graduate. I was scared I wouldn't ever get to "experience love". Plus I saw everyone getting a boyfriend so...I did the same.

The only guys I've ever had a crush on were fictional. Claude von Riegan, Leo Valdez, Will Turner...etc. It's always been that way. So after adding a lot of things together, I finally took the leap and called myself a lesbian for the first time publically to my friends. And it felt super scary, but okay. They were all super sweet about it and accepted it without question so that definitely made it a positive experience.

But tonight...I was lying in bed and just imagining scenarios as one does sometimes. I was imagining being all cozied up with my future gf/fiance and giving her lots of love and kisses. After while, I just started crying out of nowhere. And I felt relieved, like someone pulled the heaviest weight off of me. It finally all clicked inside. I knew in my heart, but my mind finally dropped the mask. No more pretending, no more lies to myself. My whole self was internally screaming "You're a lesbian!!" and my mind finally said "Yes, you are. You always have been." I can't fully explain how I feel, but I now know. In that moment, without a doubt, I knew.

I'm listening to Christmas and instrumental music rn like the weirdo I am, but I feel good. I feel happy. I feel found. And I feel free. This finally feels right and I'm so happy and proud to say I am a lesbian 💖

#it feels good to finally know :)#also Michael Bublé's Christmas album goes off at anytime of the year #Imma enjoy my Christmas music in peace cuz I'm celebrating. Happy pride!#I've been writing this post for like 3 1/2 hours lol why am I like this

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geejaysmith · 5 years

Text

so Kat and I were talking on Discord again and you know what that means

Kat [Yesterday at 6:49 PM] bad end where Hilbert subdues Eiffel leaving Minkowski out to die and she either drifts into the star or gets flared before she suffocates and Hilbert gets clobbered by a really pissed off Minkowski 2 possibly accompanied by Lovelace if the DL wanted to indicate how peeved they were that he messed with Their Boy Eiffel: Commander I thought you were dead. And who's that? Minkowski: I have no idea but she also wants to kill Hilbert and right now that's good enough for me.

Gill [Yesterday at 6:53 PM] ...angry alien gfs. I might just have to write that AU.

And so, like most things inevitably do with me, this got out of hand, so:

WOLF 359 SPEEDRUN/FUNHOUSE MIRROR UNIVERSE/ALIEN MINKOWSKI AU:

Eiffel can’t get to his oxygen mask in time and gets KO’d; Hera might be able to cause an electrical fire on her own to activate the loophole in her programming, but not fast enough to let Minkowski back into the station in time.

Kat [Yesterday at 6:58 PM] Dear Listeners: he's hurting our boy!!!! D : Dear Listeners: unleash the hounds

Minkowski comes to aboard Lovelace’s shuttle while Lovelace is waking up from cryo and getting her bearings. Since she’s understandably disorientated, Minkowski assumes Lovelace must’ve pulled her onboard just in time to save her life - Lovelace knows this isn’t the case, but for now, doesn’t correct her.

Having no idea who each other are, they’re obviously suspicious about one another, but both know the command authentication codes so that at least checks out. Radioing the Hephaestus itself gives the two more evidence to back up their respective stories; Minkowski takes some satisfaction in Hilbert’s shock when he picks up and hears her voice on the line, only to look over at Lovelace and see her expression darken with white hot fury.

Gill [Yesterday at 7:20 PM] "Minkowski, how the hell did you-" "Selberg. I hope killing off your crew didn't turn into a habit while I was away." And like, as much as Minkowski can just about feel the rage radiating off of the alleged captain, Lovelace is using her calm, measured Menacing Voice, and that plus the way Hilbert's stunned silence turns into disbelieving terror lifts a few of Minkowski's doubts about Lovelace being who she says she is. Kat [Yesterday at 7:20 PM] ofc a wrinkle is that hilbert would've had plenty of time to get in touch with cutter by now

Okay, schadenfreude aside, now they have a problem: there’s no way Hilbert’s about to let the shuttle dock with the station, yet alone open the airlocks for them.

This might be where Lovelace tells Minkowski “so is now a good time to mention the bomb I have wired to my heart rate?” The details on that plot point are foggy still. Kat [Yesterday at 7:46 PM] Maybe hilbert overrode Minkowski's command authentication but 'hey Hera if Lovelace is the Hephaestus' commanding officer shouldn't you do what she says' or something

(Personally I’m a fan of this working to get the shuttle docked but not to get the doors open and that’s when Minkowski goes the full Carol Danvers. Doesn’t even realize anything Weird is going on, she’s far too focused on stopping Hilbert and saving Eiffel and Hera to notice she just blasted that door open)

(let me have my superpowered alien space commando chicks ok)

(It is very badass and Lovelace finds herself quite taken with the Commander.)

(I’m gay and I ship it)

Hilbert still wrecks Hera’s hardware but Minkowski has control of the station back, Eiffel is still loopy on laughing gas but largely unharmed, and they have a new potential ally in Lovelace (and the audio files she left on the station plus Hilbert both confirm her story) except tension still rises between them because Minkowski and Eiffel need Hilbert alive to fix Hera (and because Decima virus but they don’t know that yet) and Lovelace is in favor of killing him because he’s too dangerous to leave alive. Once she’s back online, Hera sides with Lovelace.

Hilbert got a message thru to Cutter about the alien transmissions, but may not be able to establish a connection to talk to the crew directly due to stellar interference. Either way, the crew gets to speedrun season 2 because they have every reason to assume a Goddard Futuristics Kill Squad is on it’s way.

Nobody knows about Minkowski and anything strange about her since getting space-marooned has some reasonable explanation. Lovelace and the rest roll with the explanation that she got the Commander onto the shuttle; Hera might know Minkowski’s vitals flatlined and stayed that way for hours but Minkowski is the only one she tells about it. With no reasonable alternatives, they chalk it up to stellar interference disrupting the signals from her spacesuit. When SI-5 arrives Kepler knows right off the bat that there’s Something Up with Lovelace, but given Hilbert jumped the gun in pronouncing Minkowski and Eiffel dead, he doesn’t suspect Minkowski.

Maxwell and Jacobi swap a few plot-beats; Maxwell is the one who meets her double in Time to Kill and Jacobi is the one taken hostage by the crew in Desperate Measures, the fallout of which leads to D a r k V e n g e a n c e M a x w e l l .

However, because Maxwell is smart and figured a few things out, her real aim with her countercoup is yeeting Jacobi’s body into the star to get him back, and shaking sense into Kepler so he doesn’t shoot him once they do.

She probably also figured out Minkowski’s a duplicate too and so shocks her out of her denial. Probably by spacing her.

She’ll be fine, don’t give me that look.

Full chat transcript below ft. WAY more details that haven’t shaken out into something coherent just yet, nonsequitor Adventure Zone jokes, and at least one Spider-Verse reference:

Kat [Yesterday at 6:58 PM] Dear Listeners: he's hurting our boy!!!! D : unleash the hounds

Gill [Yesterday at 6:58 PM] "send in the most competent of More Competent Women we have" my brain is taking this idea and running with it, I'm picturing Minkowski hazily slipping into unconsciousness as her air supply runs out only to very suddenly come to, realizing after a few good deep breaths that she's not back in the station. This craft looks like something somebody put together in their garage, it's too much of a mess even for the Hephaestus. meanwhile Lovelace steps out of cryo to find there is suddenly a stranger in a spacesuit aboard her ship, hyperventilating her way back to proper consciousness. Out the front window is a station that looks kind of like the Hephaestus, but she's probably just been out here too- you're the commander of the USS what now, ma'am

Kat [Yesterday at 7:08 PM] bonus points since Hera monitors their suits so Minkowski gets back on structure and is like I lived?? somehow? and Hera's like Commander your vitals flatlined hours ago

Gill [Yesterday at 7:08 PM] after taking a moment to sort out exactly how impossible the situation they've found themselves in is, back on the station, Hilbert gets an unexpected comms hail from Minkowski, who should've been dead more than an hour ago, and she wishes she could see the look on his face when he hears her voice. Though she does get to see how Lovelace reacts when she hears Hilbert, and if hearing from one dead commanding officer gives Hilbert pause, it's a whole different ball game when Lovelace gets on the receiver.

Kat [Yesterday at 7:20 PM] ofc a wrinkle is that hilbert would've had plenty of time to get in touch with cutter by now

Gill [Yesterday at 7:21 PM] hm, maybe the Dear Listeners run interference so the signal doesn't get back to Earth, or at least Cutter can't get a response in which ofc might just make him send a goon squad up there anyway, so Wolf 359 Speedrun My other concern would be "there's no way Hilbert's letting those two onto the station" which may require DL Godmodding anyway

Kat [Yesterday at 7:23 PM] eiffel just strapped to a table the whole time like the damsel in distress he is maybe he can still talk hera through some sort of hack if hilbert didn't bother to gag him

Gill [Yesterday at 7:24 PM] Dear Listeners: /metaphorically playing rock paper scissors to see which duplicate gets to go full Captain Marvel and BAMF her way back onto the station also Minkowski going full Commander Mama Bear and blasting a door or three open is a wonderful mental image Eiffel, half-conscious, strapped to a lab table, extremely sure Minkowski is dead by now and Hilbert is going to dissect him- and then the door is kicked open and there she is, so full of Righteous Fury she's literally glowing. also: Eiffel blabbering something about "oh my god Commander they made you my guardian angel, I am SO sorry, you didn't do anything that warranted being stuck with that job in this life or the next but if it's any consolation it's probably not gonna be a problem much longer" "Eiffel. Eiffel I'm not dead, Hilbert's been deposed, you can stop crying now."

Kat [Yesterday at 7:37 PM] Hera like Commander but you should be dead though.

Gill [Yesterday at 7:42 PM] Minkowski headed up to the bridge, carrying Eiffel over her shoulder (he is still slightly convinced this is his dying dream and now Hera is with them here in whatever afterlife this is, so perhaps he is not, in fact, in Hell) : Well radio transmissions shouldn't come from deep space and my second-in-command shouldn't try to kill me, a lot of very strange things are happening today. "also please tell me Captain Lovelace didn't kill Hilbert while they were alone, I have questions for him." (Hera: no but I wouldn't drag your feet, also who the hell is she and how did she get on this station.)

Kat [Yesterday at 7:46 PM] to preserve elements of using Hera's loopholes to outwit Hilbert though I do like the idea of them finding some hack to let the ship dock. Maybe hilbert overrode Minkowski's command authentication but 'hey Hera if Lovelace is the Hephaestus' commanding officer shouldn't you do what she says' or something Eiffel like you forgot to disarm my only weapon doc and that's my mouth

Gill [Yesterday at 7:51 PM] makes sense, also maybe Lovelace overriding Hilbert's override buys them enough time to cook up an emergency that activates Hera's emergency protocols, since that strikes me as a more secure foothold (Lovelace: I'm overriding your override! Hilbert: Well, I'm overriding you overriding my override!) (meanwhile, Eiffel starts a fire while strapped to a table, somehow)

Kat [Yesterday at 7:53 PM] Eiffel: Hey Hera remember when you ran a cleaning cycle on the something or other on the aft deck to try to be helpful and started an electrical fire? Hera: Yeah? Eiffel: This would be a great time to be helpful

Gill [Yesterday at 7:56 PM] Hera: oops, there's a fire! looks like we gotta open all the airlocks to vent the fire, including the one to the docking bay! He's locked himself into the bridge, Commander. (Lovelace: dibs on punching him first. Minkowski: not if I get there before you do.)

Kat [Yesterday at 8:00 PM] SI 5 gets there at some later point and Kepler is like ah yes, captain lovelace, definitely an alien. surprise bitch. there's 2 ofc hilbert lied in his message and said he'd terminated both Eiffel AND minkowski so maybe Kepler's like... a whole crew... all aliens

Gill [Yesterday at 8:02 PM] Kepler: okay, so what're the odds Hilbert jumped the gun vs I am now walking into a station full of aliens. shitpost brain chiming in with: Kepler: ok, is anyone in this crew not an alien? Hera: Me.

Kat [Yesterday at 8:03 PM] Eiffel's like an honorary adopted alien

Gill [Yesterday at 8:04 PM] alt version that could potentially be serious: Kepler: ok, fess up, I know there's at least one alien onboard. Eiffel: It's me extra meme'd version: Jacobi: She's an alien, she's an alien, he's an alien - I'm an alien! Are there any other aliens I should know about??? duplicate!Maxwell: (^:

Kat [Yesterday at 8:05 PM] Minkowski: Ok, we need to take out Hilbert. We have the element of surprise, but what other assets do we have? Lovelace: Is this a bad time to mention the bomb strapped to my heartrate.

Gill [Yesterday at 8:06 PM] Minkowski: The bomb. Lovelace: Yup. Minkowski: The bomb that is presumably armed. Lovelace: Yup. Minkowski: ...and where in this small, enclosed shoebox of a deep space vessel is this device? Lovelace: Wired into the shoebox's engine. Minkowski: Of course it is.

Kat [Yesterday at 8:09 PM] minkowski: I get launched off the good ship crazy and find the only person crazier within the next 8 light years. Lovelace: That's because I'm the only bitch that can handle it.

Gill [Yesterday at 8:12 PM] also, Minkowski: Could this day get any weirder. Lovelace: Uh ...as a matter of fact, it can. Minkowski: Please don't tell me you have superpowers or anything like that. Lovelace: Well, I don't, but tell me Minkowski, do your hands... normally glow? alternatively Minkowski is just too Righteous Fury to even notice the Dear Listeners trying to get a word in and now Eiffel is convinced she's secretly been an X-Man the whole time

Kat [Yesterday at 8:19 PM] Lovelace like so... cons? woke up back at the Hephaestus. pros? got a hot girl airdropped

Gill [Yesterday at 8:23 PM] Lovelace, initially: who the hell are you and how did you get on my ship and what the hell is happening, explain before my escalating heartrate kills us both Lovelace, watching Minkowski go full Captain Marvel after teaming up with her and the rest of The New Gang to stop her mutinous ex-friend: potential enemies to potential lovers inside of 20 minutes, that must be some kind of land speed record

Kat [Yesterday at 8:25 PM] heart rate is still a problem

Gill [Yesterday at 8:25 PM] better get a handle on those feelings or else my escalating heartrate will kill us both they could keep that ace up their sleeve for when SI-5 turns up early, if only for the irony of having an explosive device that can be potentially triggered by Gay Feelings and Daniel Jacobi in the same space station

Kat [Yesterday at 8:29 PM] gay bomb chicken Jacobi: my bomb was fake Minkowski: My gun was empty Lovelace: My bomb is very real

Gill [Yesterday at 8:33 PM] a concept: Jacobi figuring out Lovelace has a crush because combination of explosives expertise and gaydar, his reaction is something along the lines of "no, no, NO!! Nobody told me there was gonna be relationship drama on this boat ride, what the hell" also, Lovelace: in my defense my gun was also empty but my bomb is still very real

Kat [Yesterday at 8:35 PM] Jacobi you have no room to talk Jacobi like ok we've got the human/alien or maybe alien/alien going on but I misread the human/AI deal so that's one scifi trope we've avoided so far.

Gill [Yesterday at 8:36 PM] Jacobi, probably: I keep my workplace drama and my relationship drama separate, like a professional ought to. Minkowski: why do you people keep saying I'm an alien Eiffel: Honestly Commander I'm still holding out hope for the "mutant" route, do you perchance know a Charles Xavier?

Kat [Yesterday at 8:37 PM] re: your last I'm imagining Jacobi being like 'I'm upset about this for personal reasons but i'm going to be professional about it.' *clocks out* *screams*

Gill [Yesterday at 8:39 PM] (1) I'm laughing and (2) I mean Hera's the one that clocked out for break but that is technically still what happened in Dirty Work

Kat [Yesterday at 8:42 PM] My union contract says when I'm not clocked in I can be as dramatic as I want Kepler: remember rule # 8. No complaints. Jacobi: My shift ends in 30 seconds. They both watch the clock. 30 seconds later Jacobi: Son of a biTCH

Gill [Yesterday at 8:43 PM] Kepler: what union Jacobi: I'd tell you but then I'd have to kill you before you could get Cutter's anti-union hitsquad involved

Kat [Yesterday at 8:43 PM] The Jacobi Union

Gill [Yesterday at 8:44 PM] "help my Jacobis have unionized" though Gay Bomb Chicken + Lovelace almost puts me in mind that this AU is like an almost-mirror of canon and so Lovelace is the one who ends up talking Jacobi down somehow and it's Maxwell who does get Xerox'd in Time To Kill

Kat [Yesterday at 8:49 PM] this does raise. Questions about Cutter vs Minkowski and Lovelace can he only control 1 at a time

Gill [Yesterday at 8:51 PM] or they just actually succeed at covering up that one of them (Minkowski, probably) is a duplicate

Kat [Yesterday at 8:51 PM] also if you're saying everything's switched is Maxwell still the one who gets shot in desperate measures

Gill [Yesterday at 8:53 PM] Lovelace: I'll take one for the team, I'll be the alien. Minkowski: you really think they'll buy it /cue season 3 finale

Kat [Yesterday at 8:53 PM] honestly if jacobi got shot and maxwell went feral she'd probably win tbh

Gill [Yesterday at 8:55 PM] hm... Maxwell going full Rage Mode, getting to deal with the tasty dramatic emotions of Genuine Loss AND the consequences of turning on Hera, or Maxwell does still get shot but then a few hours later they find her walking around like nothing happened with no memory of the past two weeks both are delicious

Kat [Yesterday at 8:57 PM] I feel like instead of goading the others into it dark!Maxwell would either take out kepler herself or force Hera to do it Hera like, I'm not particularly morally distressed about this I would've killed him if you'd asked but you're making me so I'm mad

Gill [Yesterday at 9:00 PM] Alternatively Maxwell looks at the situation, remembers the Implications Hera might've let slip that, as far as appearances go, Minkowski came back from the dead to stop Hilbert and protect her crew, and says "okay, no. Not when it's her finger on the trigger and Jacobi's life on the line, let's back off and regroup." Kepler is not pleased with this decision of hers.

Kat [Yesterday at 9:02 PM] alternatively alternatively Minkowski: I'm sorry I killed your friend I guess? Maxwell: Actions speak louder than words. Help me yeet his body into the star. I think I've figured this out.

Gill [Yesterday at 9:04 PM] Lovelace comes back but the Dear Listeners decide it's more energy efficient if they drop off the new Jacobi while they hold their Contact Event so in this timeline it's Jacobi who's had enough of Kepler's whamma-jamma. Lovelace: doesn't it freak you out that they can just puppet you around?? Jacobi: yes but I'm very good at compartmentalizing. Also blowing off Kepler's hand? Strangely satisfying.

Kat [Yesterday at 9:08 PM] given the symbolism in play in canon there that's some sort of mobius double metaphor reacharound

Gill [Yesterday at 9:12 PM] canon timeline: "Disarming" = removing Kepler's right hand, foreshadowing his right hand man turning against him and no longer being a weapon in his arsenal Funhouse-Mirror timeline: Jacobi, Kepler's right hand man, can now be controlled by the Dear Listeners, so maybe Kepler gets a Replacement Alien Hand that the Dear Listeners can communicate through via sign language or writing wasn't sure where trying to work out THAT tangle of thought was gonna go but "help my right hand is possessed" is an a-okay destination by me

Kat [Yesterday at 9:13 PM] tbf many ASL signs are two handed, albeit often a doubled similar sign idk about other languages

Gill [Yesterday at 9:14 PM] hey my first thought was "the animatic with the sockpuppets is now a PROPHECY" I'm in full Insane Troll Logic mode

Kat [Yesterday at 9:14 PM] pryce is gonna have a hell of a time lobotomizing everyone depending on how far you want to take this but yeah the robot hand = getting ur robot lobotomy second in command so idk where u go there

Gill [Yesterday at 9:18 PM] hey, you've got so many duplicates walking around now, why save the psi-wave regulator trick for the finale? I mean there might not be enough if the star isn't blue but... I mean they had to test that thing somehow, right do they have a psi-wave generator lying around somewhere?

Kat [Yesterday at 9:20 PM] I assume it goes both ways, since it seems to be an increase that causes the possession, and cutter was essentially doing that to lovelace

Gill [Yesterday at 9:21 PM] or: Cutter challenges the known aliens (Jacobi and Lovelace, if they do successfully keep Minkowski on the down-lo) to a board game, and whoever comes in last place is gonna be the first one to get dissected!

Kat [Yesterday at 9:22 PM] Lovelace: What if you lose

Gill [Yesterday at 9:23 PM] Cutter: Then I throw one of your friends out the airlock while you watch! maybe they still tried to put Jacobi thru Processing first while unaware he'd been alien'd so he broke the neural scanner, and they just restraining bolted Eiffel, Maxwell, and Minkowski. Minkowski's restraining bolt is running but doesn't do shit, and she's stuck putting on the performance of a lifetime while she comes up with a Plan

Kat [Yesterday at 9:28 PM] time to use your acting chops I have another long day tomorrow, I should probably go to bed. Enjoy figuring out which of the like 500 strands of spaghetti we flung at the wall is the one that sticks.

Gill [Yesterday at 9:31 PM] o/ night night, I'll probably be typing at you to get some coherent Ideas out so enjoy THAT wall of text in the morning

Kat [Yesterday at 9:32 PM] I Will

Gill [Yesterday at 9:36 PM] shaking up the Contact Event aside I kinda like the idea of Maxwell's Rampage Of Revenge ending up being just one big gambit to get somebody to chuck Jacobi's body into the star... and then I thought "what if Minkowski has been stubbornly dodging that she got alien-resurrected this entire time and can keep finding explanations around the weird shit happening to her, and Maxwell's plan ALSO has her forcing Minkowski to face the truth?"

Gill [Yesterday at 9:45 PM] "Yes, all of this was a ploy to trap you in the decompression chamber, but it was also a ploy to get you to throw Jacobi's body into the star. I just thought to myself, hey, if I'm gonna go to the trouble of going Dark Vengeance Maxwell, I might as well multitask."

Gill [Yesterday at 9:52 PM] Minkowski: Did we NOT just agree that killing me or Kepler isn't gonna solve anything?? Maxwell: Oh you're right, it won't! Don't worry Commander, you've gotten lucky with airlocks in the past, right? Like how the Captain found you just in time? And that hour you spent with your vitals all flatlined was just a glitch, caused by "stellar interference"? I have a funny feeling your luck hasn't run out just yet.

Gill [Yesterday at 10:00 PM] so Minkowski gets to process that she was An Alien The Whole Time while Eiffel is probably off on his visionquest, Jacobi is Back and having a similar Bad Time, and Maxwell's escaped into the vents to keep Hera from killing her as violently as possible. Kepler and Lovelace are having the least amount of Crisis. slight alteration to this: by some Process Of Events, Eiffel gets to play out the Dramatic Rescue that happened offscreen in Box 953 and that's how he ends up outside and decides to jump into the star, or Minkowski goes on his adventure with him (though not as a frozen corpse the whole time if I can find a way to wrangle it even if I do have to invoke my right as a fanfic writer to jump this shark and say Fuck It, Alien Clones Can Breathe In Space Sometimes)

Gill [Yesterday at 10:26 PM] Minkowski, totally not freaking out herself: Eiffel, you still need to worry about conserving your oxygen supply, so I am giving you a direct order to not freak out. Eiffel, who I must note has not seen The Last Jedi: ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?! THIS IS LIKE IF PRINCESS LEIA KILLED JABBA THE HUTT BY FORCE-LIFTING HIM INTO THE SARLACC PITT FROM STRAIGHT OUTTA THE WILD BLUE NOWHERE! yes it did take me getting ready for bed to realize that sound can't travel in space if no air so Minkowski would have to Dear Listener-commandeer his comms channel to talk to him, unless we want to get into my Found Family Psychic Link conspiracy theories additionally a TAZ joke popped into my head and it's not gonna leave til I say it no matter how little sense it makes without twisting the narrative into a logic-pretzel Bob, after witnessing Minkowski just out-stubborn physics: how... what in the world are you? Minkowski: I'm bisexual. Bob: And do all... bisexuals have this power? Minkowski: /glances at Eiffel, raises an eyebrow Eiffel: ...I'm personally partial to the pansexual label myself, sooooo... Minkowski, @ Bob: Yes.

Gill [Yesterday at 10:47 PM] alternatively after a brief and entirely physically impossible conversation about what he's about to do, Eiffel's like, okay, I'm gonna cut my tether while you keep ahold of it, then you push off from me, I push off from you, I go see what our friends want while you go take command of your station. bc then that lets me do this: Minkowski: Okay, on three. You ready? Eiffel: ...no. You? Minkowski: ...not really. But maybe that's all it is, a- Eiffel: A leap of faith, right. Okay, on three. [muffled What's Up Danger playing from the Dorado constellation in the distance]

Gill [Yesterday at 11:01 PM] I still don't know what happens to Hilbert, sorry m'dude

Gill [Yesterday at 11:12 PM] Last thought before I succumb to unconsciousness for the night: I'm just gonna drive a monkey wrench right into those gears and toss out "instead of Hera manifesting a humansona in mental space she gets herself a custom meatsuit 3D printed, made from the DNA of her friends" and then just not think through the implications of that at all right now

Kat [Today at 6:21 AM] "brief and entirely physically impossible conversation" yknow you can't talk in space but you could sign in space I was also thinkin maybe the Lovelace/crew tension is that Hilbert still rips Hera's personality out and they want to keep him around to fix her and Lovelace wants to kill him bc he's too dangerous

Kat [Today at 6:42 AM] Maybe and/or instead of trying to kill him Maxwell's rampage involves trying to convince Kepler that the duplicates still count as people since she's going to all the trouble of getting Jacobi back and he better not just fucking shoot him again. and instead of his heel-face turn getting kicked off by a betrayal making him rethink his entire life it's Maxwell reading him the riot act like 'maybe you've told yourself these aren't real people so you can do more terrible shit to them but I'm getting my best friend back and you're going to like it' Maxwell: Repeat after me: I will not rekill Jacobi. Kepler, droning at gunpoint: I will not rekill Jacobi. Maxwell: And if I'm an asshole Lovelace takes another limb. Lovelace: Oh, I like Dark Maxwell.

Kat [Today at 7:06 AM] Kepler like, You want to invite one of these monsters on board just because it has a face you know. Maxwell: for god's sake, you've been living with the captain for months and you're telling me you really still believe that? (Idk how they'd actually make the delivery once maxwell asks for it, maybe they'd send him back as a peace offering when spitting Eiffel out?) Jacobi, recently returned from the dead in space: what the fuck upon getting back to the Hephaestus and immediately being apprehended by Cutter and co: what the fuck

Kat [Today at 7:14 AM] like Maxwell's real pissed and upset until the funeral and then once she sees Lovelace resurrect she's like Hey she starts off ranting @ Kepler for keeping secrets the same way as Jacobi did but then she's like "don't you get it, that's how we can get him back" Kepler, about 2 exits behind on the freeway: wait what

Gill [Today at 7:15 AM] Maxwell: I'm gonna need some help to get rid of a body Kepler: I mean I'm not following but ok Maybe the Dear Listeners have the presence of mind to just put Jacobi back on the Hephaestus directly He has a few minutes to reboot in peace before Maxwell leaps on him from the vents for Happy Reunion Time

#wolf 359 #conversations with kat #gill's AU children #listen Commander Mama Bear + superpowers was just way too sexy an idea for me to leave alone #to say nothing of the ANGST POTENTIAL #the DRAMA... the TENSION... the ALIEN GIRLFRIENDS...#long post

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migleefulmoments · 5 years

Note

“Precious little d. Either embarrrssed about talking about sex or it had been quite some time, and if it had been a long time, that seems quite inconsistent with the PR story that was starting to ramp up as this was not long before confirmation day and the I’m a straight man with a gf tour.” Gawd is she serious lols. Darren loves a naughty pun so why would be embarrassed to talk about sex. And seeing as Abby has probably never had sex she should probs keeps quiet.

Darren embarrassed to talk about sex? HE WROTE “ME AND MY DICK”!!!!!! He has a bar called Tramp Stamp Grannies which serves drinks called boob soup...there is no way in hell he was embarrassed. Like who the hell is she thinking about when she says that? Herself? Kurt with his “because of the layers” conversation? Certainly not Darren Criss.

The clip is here (X) so you don't have to watch the entire episode.

He says ‘who me” and takes a heart beat to answer - Kathy makes another joke and he says “IDK...IDK, yesterday?” to which Kathy says “because I would think playing a gay guy but being a hot straight guy, you must get a ton of pussy” and he says “Well I mean, well I mean, I don’t want to embarrass Lily...” In fact Darren says “yeah, yeah” while Kathy is saying this. He wasn’t silent and trembling in the corner while Lily saved him. IDK what video you were watching. Kathy wasn’t outing him she was making a joke about how much pussy he gets being straight and hot but playing a gay guy. How do the ccers get everything so wrong? Oh right- they cut the clip, slow it down, make a gif which Abbys calls

““Little bonus:”

Keep reading some high-end nonsense-I commented on some of the nonsense but I only made the comments regarding this video “bold”.

Anonymous asked:

For some reason KGriffin has been on my mind today. Her infamous interview asking D about vaginal sex. Dude looked like he was going to come out of his skin. Another thing as close as C is with her I’ve seen a lot of pics with him at her house at parties without the boyfriend.

Oh you mean this classic moment? An interview just a few short months after the woman he had been betrothed to since birth moved to LA and you’d think the answer would be frequent and all time and not something that would completely fluster him. So much so that L/ily had to step in and save him.(Yes, because everyone wants to say “frequently and all the time” about their girlfriend who just moved to town. Classy. Lily didn’t “step in and save him”. You should have watched the video again before you write about it.)

You can always see his brain spinning, thinking “can I say 3 years ago before I became Co/lfersexual? Oh wait my beard lives here now. Surely if it were real it would be all the time. Should I just refer to the last time I had sex with C? They don’t need to know there was no vagina involved…..” (Yes, that is exactly what a sane person would think in the heartbeat it takes him to answer. Watch the video again- NOT THE GIF...your fantasy has changed the facts-you sound like Trump “he ran int other tunnel and died crying and screaming and whimpering like a dog”)

He was so obviously struggling and thankfully L/ily, an openly gay woman, made it into a joke to spare him. (what joke does L/ily tell that saves him? I’m curious because when I watch the video that part must be mute)

Precious little d. Either embarrrssed about talking about sex or it had been quite some time, and if it had been a long time, that seems quite inconsistent with the PR story that was starting to ramp up as this was not long before confirmation day and the I’m a straight man with a gf tour. (But look at that, it IS consistent with YOUR story of a fragile but powerful gay man who realized he loved his costar the moment they met but woefully that love is forbidden for reasons that make no sense whatsoever but involve Ryan Murphy and a contract, a contract he signed with wide-eyed innocence at 23. He just wanted to share his talents with the world and the lure of fame dazzled him but he soon found out he signed the deal with the devil. It’s the story of a man who chose the wrong beard and is still paying for that a decade later just as he still pays for signing that contract as a naive 23 yo. A man who, as you say “likes cock”, but it stuck spending most of his time with his “wife”, a woman he detests. This fragile but strong man who wrote “me and My Dick” and mimicked masturbation while standing in front of the paparazzi pen on a red carpet is is TERRIFIED of talking about sex...duh!)

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rougedraconteur asked:

Just want to say that I could not be happier about most of the Halloween costumes and parties this year. But, I do think it needs to be said that Kathy and Chris were friends before this. By this interview with D, she and Chris had been pals for years. I know she was on Glee, as a judge of one of their many competitions. And she also held a fake marriage ceremony with him on stage somewhere, with Chris as her groom. She’s like Jane, a mom sub. C was on K’s show, then D, same as Jane’s.

And yes, Kathy knew. She always has, same as Jane. They are insiders, people to be trusted with the truth. She just loves to put people on the spot, even those she cares about. All of these folks on the show that day, knew the truth, whatever it was at that time.(She’s his mother figure? but his mother was alive when this was shot. I love how they “know” this stuff-everyone know but nobody thought to help Darren or stop working with Ryan Murphy out of solidarity and support- hell even Darren didn’t support Darren by icing Ryan Murphy out of his life. Also nobody has leaked on bit of information ...ever...in 10 years. That impressive AF. )

***********************************************************************

This Halloween was like Christmas, it was fabulous and no matter what they try, they cannot undo it. And I am confident D&C were fully aware of what was happening on Thursday night with the pictures. They have been playing this game for years, they know how not to be in the background of photos. They wanted those pics circulated.(more confirmation bias) So my question is, why now and who allowed those pics to be published? We all know the content is generally very controlled. And I would imagine EP has full control over the pics that are released from his party, I always question his involvement and well he was responsible for the only formal pic to date of CC, albeit a group photo.

C killed Halloween with his 2 costume choices. They were amazing. And I love that both he and D wee in drag last Saturday.

As for M/iarren, while the costumes themselves were not that great (kind of cheap and poorly executed though D as a dalmatian was adorable). I would say she spent more time and effort on the pics with her “squad’), i loved both of them. The villain and the victim. And in both cases, the D character won. And costume one was a blatant nod to C and his amazing books. Proving she is obsessed with us and what we say and trying to one up C.

Sad for her, she lost Halloween this year and CC triumphed and caused an absolute riot (a riot caused by Chris, Darren, Will and Mia speaking together at a party.. it has come to this#SAD!).

On K/athy thanks for the insight. I guess i cannot imagine asking such a direct question if I knew the truth. I guess what she failed to realize is that D is a terrible liar, especially back then. (why would Kathy, a great friend to Chris, do something so painful and difficult for Darren in front of a video camera let alone on a comedy show. Outing someone is a serious matter and not something concussive a rapid-fire comedy show. Your theory makes no sense whatsoever). His face told a million stories and none of them were of a straight man with a gf that just moves across the country to be with him (yes Abby, his face gave him away because his words sure as hell didn’t, never have and never will. It’s absurd but you continue to believe you know his truth based solely on facial expresses-which you have proven you cannot read accurately-, t-shirt graphics, song lyrics and Instagram “likes” but sadly, that is where we are at).

No doubt both L/ily and JTF knew. I think JTF has actually been a role model to D. And he and JM have been, from what i can see, really amazing to both our guys.(Vomit- random gay men in Hollywood are not “supporting Darren” through his 10 years of closeting, denial and marriage to a women-they have their own lives.) And L/ily would never have jumped in that way if she thought for one second that d was capable of handling it himself (Oh FFS, Darren made the joke about him and Lily having vaginal sex, Lily didn’t jump in, she cracked up and after he milked the joke for all he could get out of it- then she made a joke riffed off his. Your fantasy has overtaken the truth once again. Luckily we have video proof). But since D could not muster an answer, she answered for him and then he was able to collect himself and go with the joke. (that isn’t true at all-it’s a complete a lie).

Intereting side note, when that video originally aired, i still believed the PR story and I remember thinking about how odd his answer was and how uncomfortable he was. And i wasn’t looking for anything as I didn’t think there was a reason for him to lie.

I love this interview. And example of something team shit would dream about if only d could answer convincingly and instead it completely shined a light on the fact that D is queer and prefers the company of men, at least at that point in his life (Not making a statement on his past and sexuality) (OMG really? You're not? All you do is make statements about his sexuality. Let’s pretend you are right with this theory- For all the help that Jesse Tyler Ferguson, Ricky Martin, Ryan Murphy, and all the other gay men in Hollywood are providing ccDarren, this video showing how team shit failed again was broadcast 6 1/2 years ago (3/13) and Darren is still saying he’s straight, he’s still not spending time with Chris -well of course except the Halloween moment caught on the camera-they still lead entirely different lives and Darren married Mia sooo I’m not sure how they are team “shit”. Sounds like “team perfect” since everything is going their way. They even got Darren to cuddle Mia for a photo as “punishment” for that little moment with Chris...Team Shit for the Win....again!)

#cc #ccer #cc fandom #crisscolfer #darren criss #debunking cc liees #Kathy Griffin Show

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steve0discusses · 6 years

Text

Yugioh S3 Ep5: Happy Valentines Season the Writing Team Remembered YugixTea Exists

Alrighty, I’m mostly back together from nearly a week of the plague and now my buffer is basically demolished. Man. Youknow, every time I make a buffer this happens. Maybe I was just asking to get sick? That every time I finish a healthyish buffer my immune system just tanks in response?

Anyway, that’s fine because it’s been like a week now that I’ve been sort of wanting to talk about the massive amount of birds in this episode. Yeah, birds. I mean there’s no reason for me to try and hide the spoilers, I’m assuming 99% of y’all have seen this show. There were a LOT of birds.

Last we left off, Yugi decided to run headfirst into a trap door.

And then on the other side he was somehow amazed this was a trap?

Because there wasn’t either a mace or an ax handy to go through the wall like Tristan And Duke, instead Yugi has to end up in a Photoshop Filter.

Shoutouts to the overlay aurora borealis on top of this whole mess. This whole aesthetic here is just so nostalgic and I didn't even watch this show as a kid.

Man the 00′s were a great time. Speaking of great time.

We’ve had like 0 Joey for like 4 episodes and it’s been kind of incredible since this show leans pretty heavily on Joey. Like I have barely touched that mustard color in Photoshop, instead it’s been a lot of Tea, and I’ll be honest, about time. I have been saying for like 3 seasons now that this girl never has anything to do but be a ghost bus and a sort-of-not-really-gf to I guess Mokuba and sometimes Yugi but now she’s...still not doing a whole lot. I’ll be honest her new big thing is mostly running away from things, but at least now she now does Olympian feats while still doing nothing.

But all that’s gotta change because, much like Joey in S1, Tea’s gonna throw some cards with only like 2 games under her belt.

So like, I was experiencing Witcher 1 the other day, and I don’t recommend it since Witcher 1 is not nearly as good as it’s sequels, but there’s this hilarious line where Witcher is gonna learn a dice minigame, and he asks his friend “how can I become a dice expert?” and his friend goes “Well that takes experience! Play 4 games.” and it’s like lol what? 4? That was all it need for ANYONE to be an expert, huh?

This is like that. Yugioh is a weird universe where Yugi is King of Games but he’s only been in one tourney and he’s only played this game professionally in a professional no-one-is-setting-anyone-on-fire setting like maybe 4 times.

Like everyone plays this game but the bar for entry is surprisingly low? All Yugi had to do was beat one guy by playing him once, really--just beat Pegasus and boom, King of Games. No wonder Seto was so freakin pissed.

Anyways, so the fact that Tea hasn’t really played is just like everyone else on this show.

(read more)

Anyways, after she ran 4 miles and climbed a bridge and all that, she decides, youknow what? Right here in this barren orc-filled desert is probably a safe place for a dream sequence.

And she dreams of the very last person I expected her to dream about.

So...I have questions about this dream sequence, ones that I will touch on later, but clearly Tea is getting some inception quality prophetic card knowledge from Yugi through a dream...however...Yugi isn’t actually doing anything right now. Right now Yugi is running through Tron so like...how is this happening?

Like is this just Tea actually knowing how cards work under layers and layer of subconscious? Because under layers and layers of Tea’s subconscious is actually SlightlyMoreOrLessEvil!Marik, who, as we discovered through last season’s plot twist is actually very, very bad at cards. Bakura might be still under there too, but he’s sort of everywhere just minding his own business so I doubt he’d bother coming out for Tea. Bakura’s still canonically dead/hanging out in Yugi’s Brain Labyrinth Game Room playing Gameboy Advance until Season 5.

I mean, it would be neat if Yugi actually could do this but like...he’s not actually here or at all aware that this is happening. Yes he has Ishizu’s necklace right now but will not use it this episode. This is just happening for no reason.

Which leads right into the second thing which is our most vague couple is finally going to get it’s own episode since like the beginning of season 2 and it’s literally all a dream.

Flashbacks to Yugi and Tea actually hanging out and talking one on one were all we really needed to stop calling this ship vague but eh this BARELY counts as it’s all one sided. This is just Tea doing all of this relationship herself. Which is pretty true to form as Yugi is a mess and can barely do relationships with himself at this point, let alone add a girl into the mix.

I feel like at this point a Broadway play about one single Yugioh card is waaaaaaay more likely than YugixTea ever like ever getting together (cuz like FOR REALS most Broadway is bad. Like legit not great). In fact, this make believe date they went on together is so far from reality--as it is not only a dream, but a dream in VR, and that even in the dream itself Yugi reminds her “PS, WE NEVER WENT ON THIS DATE, PS” and Tea’s like “that seemed open ended” and Yugi was like “NOPE.”

So this play is so terrible that it asks for audience participation and it turned her into a cosplayer.

So little aside, when I got my Netflix account the first thing I rented was Ironman, and then the second thing I rented, mostly out of morbid curiosity, was Cats.

Regrets. I like watching some pretty bad movies and plays but Cats is sort of like...if everyone dressed like personified leg warmers and made us pretend the leg warmers turned them into cats for some reason, and that the legwarmers were all in a polyamorous relationship with everyone else and got way too horny when they danced. And then they all died at the end/went to space/got reincarnated. But, I guess we have to give Cats some credit for basically launching furry technology forward like 50 years.

I am SUPER looking forward to the Cats movie. Probably will skip it in theaters but Netflix? Yes, please!

Anyway, Pharaoh was also here chaperoning these two like he always does although Tea has no idea what he looks like.

I just realized that, so far, every date we’ve seen with YugixTea, Yugi wasn’t even there. Like how does he keep managing to do this? The kid is managing this relationship like a champ being the supportive boyfriend or whatever and he’s not even there. Like damn.

A penguin.

so many penguins

Anyways, the animation team drew I want to say like 600 penguins for this episode. I just want to acknowledge their sacrifice for our behalf, so we could have this filler episode and watch an actual relationship blossom between Yugi and Tea but only in a dream sequence.

Because I notice art stuff like this, they did copy paste these penguins in a clever way so it wasn’t drawing 60000 penguins, but damn that’s still a lot of penguins.

My bro, the namesake of this blog, freakin loves penguins. So this entire episode he kept looking over at me and being like “right?! RIGHT!?” and it was like “wow, Bro they really made this show just for you huh?” and he was like “RIGHT?!?!”

So the thing about Crump is that he likes collecting numbers about people, which the show makes out to be strange but I have a bunch of accountant friends, and I once had one tell me that God was an accountant, and then he gave me some complicated explanation that I absolutely muted out of my memory. I once had a friend who had a fascinating spreadsheet on everywhere she lived and the friends she had, just to see if she could accurately display the percentage chance of who was dating, who was getting married, and the exact percentage of which of those broke up and the length of all of their relationships. And she was an art major.

I never saw those spreadsheets of love numbers, I only know they exist, and I have no idea where I stood on them. Sometimes I think about it. Is she still tracking me? I sure hope so.

Dude that one penguin on the right just

This show throws out the number 219 pieces of pizza like that was a bad thing?

I guarantee you, that eating 14 slices of pizza a year is a depressingly low statistic (assuming you don’t eat pizza when you’re 1 yo) That is only about 1.5 large pizzas a YEAR. That is nothing.

Course bear in mind I’m a Californian and I eat like...about 2-3 slices every time fast food pizza is offered me. And if I’m alone, well dammit I’ll eat.......more than that, we’ll just say. In fact, I just Marie Kondo’d my closet and found my college cookbook which was mostly me trying to replicate the CPK Thai chicken pizza as well as the CPK Pear Gorgonzola pizza (and may the CPK Pear Gorgonzola Pizza Rest in Peace, you perfect pizza. I have not returned to CPK once it left the menu. Bro hates this pizza but he is wrong.)

Like it sounds way nasty but I’m Californian so we don’t believe in food purity here. Put whatever the hell you freakin want on your dumb ass pizza. No food is sacred, no food will be left untouched, we’re all human beings, and everything you like is all going to be turned into pizza and tacos anyway. That is the way.

I’m pretty sure that I’ve only had 219 pieces of just Pear Gorgonzola Pizza (since it was a pricier pizza). Maybe Crump was just referring to the one type of zah?

Anyway, I got very distracted by pizza just now.

Tea heard Crumps offer to duel her in exchange for her body and she was like “I don’t really actually want to do that.” and just bounced.

I mean at least she tried to bounce. As it is, I’m glad Tea is like the only one here who at least has figured out that Cards are Dangerous.

And then an iceberg formed under her feet.

Meanwhile, Yugi has been sent to this room with four doors. Each door has a number of stars between one and four. Please remember he has Ishizu’s future necklace somewhere on his person and it could probably help him out but nah.

and then out of no where Yugi pulls this out of his pocket.

Another place where, because they localized the show to a ton of different countries, they decided to make a fake currency so people wouldn’t be thrown off by a Japanese coin and it only made the lore more confusing. He could have just used a Yen and I’m pretty sure us American kids would have been fine but localization problems amiright?

But yeah, there’s just this super random Millennium Penny that Yugi just has. To have. The redheaded stepchild 8th Millennium item no one remembers. Just like how no one remembers Bakura.

Now that I think of it, he did pull some pennies out of his pocket back in S1 with the labyrinth riddle. So maybe that’s just a skill the millennium puzzle can do--making weird ass pennies?

This is my brother’s aesthetic, this right here. This Big Penguin in a 3 piece suit and it’s got some anime for some reason strapped in the most goofy way on it stubby little wing.

This is Steve-o’s Mood down to a T.

Anyways, funnily enough, Tea and Yugi do actually get to communicate with each other this episode, but she isn’t aware that she’s doing it, much like how he wasn’t aware that he was in a dream she just had.

And so, Yugi feels newly inspired and very desperate and just throws himself directly at the door.

Yugi never did this back when Tea was abducted last season. Which...was yesterday. All that happened literally yesterday in the timeline of this show. Literally yesterday in the timeline of the show Seto Kaiba had to save Tea because Yugi got himself tied to an anchor and was too busy trying to kill himself to save Joey Wheeler (which didn’t even work and Serenity had to save Joey Wheeler instead it was a whole very confusing thing.) Like Yugi has got to stop needlessly sacrificing himself it only works a fraction of the time.

Anyway, Crump (Crumb? I don’t remember his name anymore) gives us a little backstory on why he chose to be a bird. We never got a backstory with like...Gansley. I think Yugi didn’t really waaaant to know why he was a sexy fish. And Gansley honestly didn’t want to tell him. And personally, I’m OK with not knowing.

What is it with TV shows and saying that every freakin weird tick their characters have is down to childhood trauma? Usually from parents? Like it’s such a tired trope nowadays. And honestly, from a psychological standpoint, TV shows constantly blaming parents for any character being an asshole is sort of unfair because sometimes you just have a kid who’s an asshole and it’s no one’s fault (except for the kid himself). But mostly, Yugioh tends to get creative with their backstories and this one is just “I dunno, I was lonely” which is a whole lot like the Mai backstory, but she didn’t turn into an evil bastard who wants to be a penguin, did she?

Hell, she got engaged.

Anyways, Seto’s S1 outfit makes a rare appearance. I miss that green jumpsuit with the pop collar. We got it twice this season. Heh, and bro told me this arc was bad.

And so because Crump was just straight up real bad at business and didn’t know how to find more angel investors, he’s just gonna do a murder.

Can we talk a little bit about this? So Gozoboro Kaiba was an asshole who made a ton of weapons--and that whole time, Crump was working with him so that one day he could go up to Kaiba Sr and be like “lets put that nuclear deal on hold--what if instead we just sold...penguins?”

Like that was Crump’s whole life plan. He blames Seto for it not working out but this guy worked for a supervillain for I’m assuming was like 30 years to build this theme park that I’m pretty sure would have never been made anyway?

And then Seto turned right around and made a theme park with a bunch of dragons in it?

Like why didn’t Crump just go to a freakin Zoo and be like “Lets make a penguin only zoo?” Like why didn’t he start with people who actually worked with animals?

Why did Crump go straight to working with the evil guns n stuff company to build a children’s theme park?

Anyway, he’s a penguin now, so it’s not like Crump is really all there and altogether. Like I’m assuming that maybe Kaiba Sr got a penguin theme park commission in his inbox once a month and just threw it in the trash being all “there goes that Crump again” and just ignored it or something. Like every Halloween work party Crump would have been a penguin, right? Like EVERY Halloween for 30 years? And like when Kaiba Sr got his boys did Crump come up to him and give him a Penguin lecture about how to be a perfect parent? Like how much of a nightmare was Crump to work with and how many times did the Kaibas try to kill him before Seto finally did is what I’m asking.

Also, still taking Dayquil, thanks for asking, I apparently still have some rants.

But that’s all for now.

PS I’ll have you know I almost made the title of this episode “fowl play” and decided that was too much of a low hanging pun. But I’m still like...I’m still feeling like putting it up there. That be the mix of meds and congestion.

#yugioh #recap #photo recap #yugioh recap #S3 ep5 #tea gardner #yugi muto #SO MANY PENGUINS #penguins #seto kaiba #kaiba #noah #Yo Tea Gardner just got abducted by birds #flightless birds

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advb16 · 5 years

Text

Would someone please pack some snacks, take me out to the woods, and shoot me? That way I can at least be useful as food.

Hit some serious milestones(?) recently. And I do mean I just drove head-on into some rocks.

Professional

Just hit my 5 year anniversary of passing the bar. That was a real kick in the face because I just started at a new firm, in a new city, in a new practice area, and I feel just as lost and stupid as I did my first day of practice. Except now, I��m too exhausted to give a fuck and learn all this new law.

This is all compounded by learning a new file management system that is THE STUPIDEST THING. I’m not allowed to make any new sub-folders, and there is no consistent naming convention. So got a big case? Need to find that one, crucial piece of discovery? Let’s hope you are a Bolean search MASTER. Oh wait, that still won’t work because the search function is garbage.

Anyway. Interestingly, this is a vast improvement from my old job (small-medium firm, small town, family law). What this has made me realize, more so than ever, that I should not have gone to law school, and I would never do it again. With that said, there’s nothing else I’m good enough at doing to make this kind of money. It’s bloody depressing.

Personal

Tl;dr - boyfriend moved at the speed of light for the first three months. I finally bought in, and decided to really go for it with him, and now he’s backing off.

So. 16 weeks ago we went on our first date. We had a pretty intense, instant connection. Talked about the serious stuff, kids, money, careers, life goals, relationship talk, etc. It was a lot. By the second date he said he had stopped talking to other people on dating apps, and wasn’t seeing anyone else. I was in no way ready to be exclusive, but he kept coming for me. Took me a little over a month to agree to be exclusive. Four weeks later he drops the “I love you.”

Once again, I am stuck being the asshole that has to be all that’s awesome, but I’m not there yet, and I’m not going to lie to you. Which... that fucking sucks. We ended up having a couple freakin’ awesome weekends together, including his birthday weekend (day with his friends, they’re great, then a super chill day with just us, some road tripping, gd magical) and I decided, fuck it. And I say it back. I know I know, “fuck it” doesn’t sound like the right way to go about it, but hear me out.

I was thinking, I have all these feels; maybe it’s love? I haven’t been in a reciprocal, loving relationship in a very long time. He’s doing all the things I want from a partner: communicating, texting me all the time, saying good morning, saying goodnight, very affectionate, great sex (not enough of it, but I guess that’s just being a woman in her 30s dating a man also in his 30s), open about his goals for the relationship and for his life, and open about his struggles. He is seeking a long-term, serious relationship, he has done the emotional growth, or at least started the process, he’s identified those areas where he needs work and is actively tackling those things, he likes his job and has career goals, and he has his finances sorted (he’s not looking for someone to support him). All the things I want, but these alarm bells just keep going off in my head. And keep going off. And keep going off.

Now, I have to give him so much credit because he engages in the hard conversations. Not only engages when I bring stuff up, but also starts them. And I know I’m exhausted with the new job, and when I’m tired, I am... not great. Now, I won’t bore you with the details, but we end up having some very, very, very heavy conversations, and we discovery that we both feel like we’re failing the other person and ourselves. We both feel like we’re walking on eggshells, like we can’t get anything right, and that we can’t really be ourselves with the other person (fucking sucks, right?!). This is followed by the revelation that by maintaining my deep desire to not be a “burden” I had made him feel unwanted. And when he feels unwanted, he doesn’t see a point in being around (fair).

So now we’ve had this groundbreaking discovery: he thinks it’s great that I have needs because then he has a job. Look at that! We’re both getting our needs met! It should also be noted, that I perceive the giving of affection as being needy (I’m a very fucked up person; we’ll leave it at that) which meant his need(s) for affection and attention weren’t being met. So in my efforts to make sure I wasn’t burdening him with all my neediness, I was also denying him the expression of the love I allegedly felt for him. Seems silly now, but it was a seriously eye opening moment for me.

Super exciting, right?! We’re on the same page, everything is awesome, we’re now moving forward together, and we’re totally committed to each other and our relationship.

Sidenote: I feel like now is a good time to mention that he has already brought up marriage, on multiple occasions. First time, was one week after our first date when he sent me a meme about being wife material, then in the text said “replace wife with with GF.” Also, he was married previously; divorced about four years ago. In that same conversation with the wife meme, he invited me to join him four months later at a four-day music festival two states away, during which time I would meet his brother, his sister-in-law and his nieces........

Anyway, we’re stupid happy, and I, like the fool of a Took I am, took him at his word that he was all in, this serious, committed relationship is what he wanted etc and I invited him to an old friend’s wedding that’s in about six weeks. His response? “Oh wow. That’s a lot. That’s huge.” To which I responded, I’m sorry. It’s what now? What did I fucking miss?! Then him, “I’m just kind of freaking out.”

what.the.actual.fuck.

So now all my alarm bells are going off again because why the fuck wouldn’t they?! This motherfucker ran immaculate game to get to a place where he is comfortable, and secure, and doesn’t need to move things forward. In fact, he’s doing exactly what I predicted, and told him I was terrified would happen: I hold out, then as soon as I finally open up and commit, you run away. And look! I was right! Exactly as predicted, right on time.

I made the mistake of rereading the first few weeks of our texts. I know people say things, exaggerate, whatever, at the beginning to look good. They do things that aren’t necessarily sustainable, that will fade over time, and reasonably so! But I feel like I’ve had partners at 3 years deep making more of an effort to engage with me and really check-in with me than he is at 3 months deep. For example, we chatted on the phone earlier for a bit, and the entire conversation was him talking about himself. His only reference to me or my well being was a statement along the lines of, “you must just be working.” I don’t need him to drag things out of me, but I use questions to gauge interest. If someone isn’t asking any questions, it’s a pretty good indicator that they aren’t interested in me much less my well-being or the banalities of my day. So if he’s not making an effort to see me (he’s not a planner, but still), he’s not curious about me, and the prospect of a low-key wedding terrifies him, how much do I really mean to him? Is this relationship what he actually wants, or is it what he’s telling himself he’s supposed to want at this stage of life?

Part of me thinks this could be the love of a lifetime, and I definitely want it to be that. Then that part is challenged by the fact that maybe I’m blinded by the blissful moments because if this chucklefuck is getting cold feet at the idea of going to a friend’s wedding around the 6-month mark of dating (he won’t even be meeting my family) after he’s spent the last three months blowing past relationship milestones at 160 mph, then what the actual fuck?

Mental

This circles back to the end of my professional update.

I have been so fucking depressed. For almost a year now. Got out of a less than healthy relationship, which made things worse for a while because it highlighted some stuff. Got a new job, which is a lot better, but being a lawyer certainly doesn’t help anything. Got a new relationship after dating a lot. And I do mean, a lot.... fuck.... so many first dates. And it’s a good relationship! I mean, when it’s good it is practically perfect, but it has been so much work. I get that anything good requires effort and work, but shit. This has been so heavy from the start.

And it just.... like... why? What am I even doing here? Using clean water and making a giant ass carbon footprint? Just consuming things? I’m not helping. I’m not making the world better. I’m just... here.... and I don’t want to be here. I haven’t wanted to be here for a very long time. My suicidal ideation keeps getting worse. I’ve brought it up to my therapist, but he isn’t super concerned. To be fair to him, I haven’t been completely honest about the severity.... I know! I know... But I can’t stand the thought of disappointing him. We’ve made such incredible progress, and how annoying must I be to come back like, yeah, I beat my night terrors, I beat the cancer, I got the job, got the boy, and I have more than enough of everything, but let me just be a whiny bitch about the meaning of life real quick.

The last couple days have been extra difficult because my platonic life partner, and for the last three years roommate, just moved out. A few months ago I had a full plan. Everything laid out, ready to go, even got halfway through, then stopped because I knew she’d be the one to find me, and I couldn’t do that to her.

Nothing looks the way I thought it would at 32. I’m glad it doesn’t look like what I thought it would at 20, but shit. Even at 30 looking towards 32, it didn’t look like this. It wasn’t this bleak. It didn’t feel this pointless.

I have no idea why I’m putting this on the internet. I think tumblr is the most appropriate place for this kind of into the void scream/crying, so here you go. It also helps to know that no one will read this.

#personal #wtf is going on #i should be happy

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