#also bear the ugly text blobs

[deaddriv]

Mithrun <3

Translated with permission! Artist on Twitter (@achu_0u0), and the original post

[wambsgansshoelaces]

How r you :(

i'm just going to use this as my big blob post. sorry for the weird vent if that bothers you there's just lots to get off my chest here!

firstly, there are a hundred more of you here than when i left. oh my goodness! you guys make me feel so special!

anyway... we can pretend like i didn't just dip for like a year. and what a shitty year it was!

i don't mean to be that guy that is all woe is me but damn woe is me that was horrible. even in the year before where i was periodically posting "don't worry i'll be back!" and then not coming back shit was tough. idk man i always thought i was strong but i'm just not. chronic illness is a bitch, loneliness is even bitchier.

the honest truth is that i really just haven't been able to give a shit outside of just the daily motions. the last two years have just been go to school, watch everyone else be happy, feel sorry for myself, come back home and slave away on homework. i couldn't even write, which is what made me happy to a certain point.

it sounds stupid but having no friends is genuinely ruining my life. i can't tell you how aggravating it is being just the lunchbox friend. even online (which, this is embarrassing) 'friends' just ghost me (yeah fuck you i'm still mad about that) or yk aren't actually friends (three seperate people have left me on read for 'let me know when you're free!' texts to hangout/talk. well damn!) but it also gets to a point where i have to introspective. i have to be the problem, right? it's just all too much on my pea brain and it's been so overwhelming to the point that all i can bring myself to do is sit on my phone on c.ai or reading fanfiction (pathetic, i know, but i'm trying to be real here) to pretend like i'm not actually living what i'm living.

i really have no clue what i'm doing. most people irl don't like me because i'm weird, and that's fine, i just have to figure out how to cope again, and i guess i'm trying this. i really don't know what i'm going to be doing with this blog. it's probably going to be whatever i want (sorry). i changed my dn to calico (i like cats and people couldn't tell that the L wasn't an i) and i think i'll change my pfp (i've watched lots of movies and shows with hot people the last two years. i also still haven't finished succession T-T). i can't go back to my old writing without cringing, so again, unsure what's going to happen with the serieses (idk how to spell that) because i just don't resonate with them anymore. gah. i feel like this is all going to embarrass me but it's like what if there's someone else out there like me who wants stuff to read to escape you know?? idk

sorry for the word vomit and weird trauma dump i'm ashamed of myself LMAO. thank you voyager for playing on repeat while i type this (boygenius is fantastic at depression you should give voyager and co a listen).

anyway. have you guys seen the pitt? love. er? love. the bear? roar. (what all of these have in common is an attractive white man btw if you can't tell what's going on with me)

anyway x2 i'll do my best to do all the requests in my box because i have balls (nope) and don't want to leave anyone hanging. any reqs are appreciated but not garunteed. idk what the fart i'll do about my pinned it's kind of ugly. stuff i probably want to write about includes but isn't limited to stardew valley, fire emblem three houses, the bear, the pitt, er, succession, the banshees of inesherin, fight club, webtoons (LOL this is where i am rn), eternal sunshine of the spotless mind, pattinson/comic batman, the gilded age, la la land, idk other sad stuff you guys remind me of

yippee! sorry for the word vomit and lowkey trauma dump....

anyway x3 how are you anon? you come here often?

my asks and message inbox are always open if anyone ever needs to talk about anything. ok bye!

[annabethy]

you’re embarrassing me in the teacher au!!! 💞💞💞

#5 “You’re embarrassing me.” Teacher AU!

Today was just not Annabeth’s day.

It was as though her students were trying to make her off herself. Each class period was agonizingly slow, and watching her kids stumble around in front of the white board unsure of how to answer a math question was just flat out agonizing.

“Piper,” Annabeth seethes as the girl makes a dumb mistake. Annabeth only feels bad for calling it dumb for two seconds before she doesn’t care. “Is that how you distribute the parenthesis?”

Piper blinks. “Is that not how you do it?”

“When you’re distributing an exponent, you write it out, not multiply everything by two.”

Honestly. She’s about to throw something.

Piper tries again, and Annabeth can feel a headache coming in as she stood there hopelessly, watching her calculus kids crash and burn. She no longer has it in her to even try and put out the fire because these were seniors who she has taught for years and they should very well know how to distribute.

“Ms. Chase,” Piper asks cluelessly, turning towards her teacher. Annabeth was perched against the wall, one hand on her forehead because dear lord. “How do you use pascal’s triangle again?”

Annabeth swallows hard, counting to three. “You don’t need to use pascal’s triangle.”

“Oh, right.” Piper turns back to the board.

It really is painful watching her students not know how to do simple math when she has taught it a million times over. Normally she would assume she was the problem, but this — there was no way she was the issue here. This was just pure stupidity.

“This is pure stupidity,” Annabeth repeats after her thoughts, pushing herself off the wall and snatching a dry-erase marker from Leo’s desk. She tries to show them how to do it, knowing full and well that she will not be teaching them integration today. Because high schoolers are high schoolers, they don’t pick up on it and Annabeth has to physically retrain herself from walking out the door with her middle finger held up high.

She gets through one problem, and she has a tiny bit of hope, but it immediately dissipates when she takes in their faces. Annabeth likes to think that they were not looking at her, but rather through her. There was no light behind their eyes, and she kind of wanted to knock the light out of her own eyes if it meant she didn’t have to bear witness to this.

“Are you okay, Ms. Chase?” Piper asks, oblivious as always.

Annabeth turns towards her, a little lightheaded and baffled (what did they put in these kids’ cheerios this morning?). “I’m just not really understanding what’s going on,” she says.

Leo tilts his head, leaning forwards on his desk with two arms. “Neither are we.”

“That’s what I’m not understanding,” Annabeth says, a snappy edge to her voice. She knows she shouldn’t yell at them because they were still kids, and things like this were inevitable, but come on. “You understood this last week.”

“We forgot,” he excuses.

“Forgot?” Annabeth says meekly.

“We had a test in marine today, so our brains are fried,” Reyna throws in. Annabeth snaps her head to Reyna, who is leaning back carelessly in her seat, picking at her nails.

Jackson.

“We still have twenty minutes left of class,” Annabeth says. “But you all smell like fried fish and are useless to me.”

Piper grins. “Ask us something easy and we can call it a day.”

“What do you need to make sure you never forget to write when you’re integrating an equation?”

“The answer!” Leo shouts confidently.

How is this level of stupidity possible?

“You’re all going to fail the AP test,” Annabeth says.

“What was the answer?” Piper asks, frowning.

“The plus c, as in crappy children are clueless.”

The pounding in Annabeth’s head is increasing with every second she looks at these kids’ faces. Right now, they were all ugly blobs she wouldn’t mind hitting over the head with a hammer, but as a teacher, she has to pretend this is motivation for her to teach them. Not that they deserved to be taught, because no, they deserve to be hit over the head with a hammer. Also maybe a tennis racket.

Annabeth just stares at her students’ ugly faces for what feels like eternity. She’s pretty sure she can see their brain cells dying with every passing second. She hears the door open behind her back and she assumes it’s one of her students leaving, and she is so jealous that it was not her leaving. She doesn’t even bother looking because if she looks, she swears she is actually going to—

“Chase!”

Annabeth scowls, turning towards the voice.

“What’s with the face?” Percy asks cheerfully, just working his way into the classroom.

“Jackson,” she says, snarling. “This is your fault.”

“What is?”

“You gave them a test and now they’re dumber than you.”

“Babe,” Percy teases. “That’s mean.”

Annabeth’s face flushes red immediately as she hears the snickers start to roll in from the twelve kids in the classroom. They’d managed to keep their relationship under wraps to avoid exactly this, but for some reason, Percy just loves to go around flaunting pet names. She isn’t sure if it’s some reverse psychology thing to make them think it’s all fun and games when it’s really not, but she does know that this is mortifying.

“You’re disgusting,” is the only response Annabeth can think of.

Percy slides up to Annabeth’s desk beside the front whiteboard, settling into her chair, prompting Annabeth to raise an eyebrow.

“Don’t you have a class?” she asks.

“It’s my planning period,” Percy says.

“Go bother literally anyone else,” Piper says. Annabeth has to admit Piper has balls.

“Thank you, Piper,” Annabeth says, impressed.

Piper preens. “You’re welcome, Ms. C.”

Percy just scoffs and rolls his eyes, rocking her chair with his foot on the ground. “I wanted to see how your class was going. It seems like it’s not going at all.”

“Thanks to you,” Annabeth says. “You’re not helping, interrupting right now.”

Percy simply takes one look around before his eyes settle back on hers. “You weren’t going to get anything done today anyways.”

“I’m in the middle of class though.”

“Is it still class if you’re not teaching?”

The look Percy gives her is one she would like very much to smack off his face. He looks so smug, and a part of her thinks that maybe he planned his test for today just so her students would forget how to do anything math related, and he could sit and watch it all fall apart.

“All I’m saying,” Percy says, turning to fiddle with a pen on her desk, “is that you could use some cheering up right now, so don’t kick your best friend out of your room.”

Annabeth glares at him.

“Piper texted me,” he explains. “Said you were being mean and to come save them from an early death.”

“Mr. Jackson!” Piper complains.

Percy disregards her, giving Annabeth a dashing smile that never fails to make her knees weak, and he stands up to hold his arms out towards her. “Come here.”

“No,” Annabeth says, taking a step back.

Percy gives her the look, and she finds herself unable to resist approaching him anyways. She steps into his arms, despite Reyna’s animated gagging motions and Leo’s whoops, and he wraps around her tightly. He’s really warm right now, and he smells so good that she could just curl into a ball and fall asleep right now. She never wants to leave his embrace. She feels protected and cared for, and it offers a place to hide from Leo’s mean flirtatious remarks.

Percy holds on for longer than expected and Annabeth has to pry his arms away. It works for a second, but then his hands are going to her cheeks and pulling her towards him, and her stomach is dropping.

He presses a sloppy wet kiss to her cheek, making sure to be obnoxiously loud, and Annabeth gasps, smacking him and wiping her cheek.

“Got you!” “You’re embarrassing me,” she whines, taking the bottom of his shirt to wipe his slobber away.

Piper has her phone out and a big smile across her face. Percy gives Piper a thumbs up before looking at Annabeth. He’s still smiling, basking in her misery and humiliation.

“But I made your day better!” Percy says, laughing. “Tell me you don’t feel better.”

“Oh, I feel fantastic that you just planted one on me in front of a bunch of students,” she says sarcastically, shoving him by the chest. He stumbles back but immediately returns, undeterred.

“As a student of yours, I do not feel fantastic,” Reyna interrupts. “In fact, I feel violated.”

Leo winks at Reyna, and Reyna shivers.

“I hate you all,” Annabeth says. “You children are the sole reason I regret becoming a teacher.”

The banter continues on between Percy and Annabeth for the rest of class, the students chiming in to team up against them. Even though Annabeth was immensely annoyed, she still has to admit that she does feel better. She hates these kids so much, but they also mean the world to her, so she can’t find it in her to be too bothered that they lost a day of teaching anymore.

The bell for lunch rings and Annabeth all but kicks her students out. Piper is the last one out, demanding a hug from Annabeth, and it’s only a little weird. Annabeth was used to Piper’s antics by this point.

Once the door closes, Annabeth turns to Percy, tilting her head at him.

“It was funny,” he says, snickering under his breath at her face. He comes up in front of her, and because there is no one else around, he puts his hands on either side of her to trap her against the wall.

“It was embarrassing,” she mumbles, resting her head against his chest.

“I love you,” he says, kissing the top of her head. “You were having a rough day and I thought I could make it up.”

“By nearly outing us to the class?”

“You said it yourself — they’re too stupid to actually suspect anything.” Percy nudges her chin up with his nose. “If you’re still having a bad day, I can perform some tabular integration with you?”

Annabeth snorts, accepting the short kiss he gives her. “What?”

“Urban dictionary. Look it up.”

Annabeth shakes her head and bites her lower lip, endeared. She really loved this boy, even if he taught marine and used undeniably dirty terms off of urban dictionary.

“You plan on interrupting future classes again?” Annabeth asks, pressing her lips back to his. She breathes into it, letting her earlier worries slip away.

Percy smiles into the kiss. “If this is what I get, then yes.”

[alysses123]

@homoeroticsubtextinspace made me do it

1. Do you ever doubt the existence of others than you?

Well now I do! But seriously, no not ever.

2. On a scale of 1-5, how afraid of the dark are you?

3 I’d say. Feel uneasy but not terrified

3. The person you would never want to meet?

Idk, no one in particular I guess

4. What is your favorite word?

In english I love arson, idk why. In french (my native language), couette

5. If you were a type of tree, what would you be?

I love oak trees but I’m not one, i’d say more of a plum tree

6. When you looked in the mirror this morning what was the first thing you thought?

Shit I messed up my eyeliner

7. What shirt are you wearing?

Simple black one with long sleeves

8. What do you label yourself as?

Small

9. Bright room or dark room?

Bright room! With sun! or plenty of lamps!

10. What were you doing at midnight last night?

Definitely sleeping!

11. Favorite age you’ve been so far?

8. I feel like all of my childhood happened when I was 8. 

12. Who told you they loved you last?

My boyfriend I think. We’re quite cheesy actually

13. Your worst enemy?

Capitalism and how it makes us feel bad for being human.

14. What is your current desktop picture?

It’s Mtg art! Slimefoot the stowaway! Loooove it so much!

15. Do you like someone?

Plenty of people! I like my friends, most of my family, my boyfriend, the cat at my place, random people...

16. The last song you listened to?

Honestly no idea

17. You can press a button that will make any one person explode. Who would you blow up?

I’d have said the orange blob but @homoeroticsubtextinspace said Bezos and honestly? Mood.

18. Who would you really like to just punch in the face?

Me personally I wouldn’t like punching someone. However I would love to see nazis punched in the face.

19. If anyone could be your slave for a day, who would it be and what would they have to do?

No slaves, bad thing to enslave people.

20. What is your best physical attribute? (showing said attribute is optional)

My hair! Love it! Especially when I dye it on shave it!

21. If you were the opposite sex for one day, what would you look like and what would you do?

I would look like a very average guy I think, Not short nor tall, a bit on the skinnier side, brown haired… Well like me but as a guy.

Idk. I guess I would want to have sex because it must feel different when you have a penis.

22. Do you have a secret talent? If yes, what is it?

Not really, I don’t want to hide my talents!

23. What is one unique thing you’re afraid of?

Slugs. Hate them.

24. You can only have one kind of sandwich. Every sandwich ingredient known to humankind is at your disposal.

Bread with some cereals, goat cheese, figs, honey, pepper. 

25. You just found $100! How are you going to spend it?

Buy useful stuff for our home. Maybe curtains.

26. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere in the world, but you have to leave immediately. Where are you going to go?

I don’t want to travel by plane! but I’d say Iceland, looks beautiful.

27. An angel appears out of Heaven and offers you a lifetime supply of the alcoholic beverage of your choice. “Be brand-specific” it says. Man! What are you gonna say about that? Even if you don’t drink booze there’s something you can figure out… so what’s it gonna be? 

Uuuuuuuuh…. Idk. I like infused rum so I’d say HSE.

28. You discover a beautiful island upon which you may build your own society. You make the rules. What is the first rule you put into place? 

Don’t hurt others.

29. What is your favorite expletive?

Fuck. I also use Putain in french but I don’t particularly use it

30. Your house is on fire, holy shit! You have just enough time to run in there and grab ONE inanimate object. Don’t worry, your loved ones and pets have already made it out safely. So what’s the one thing you’re going to save from that blazing inferno?

My teddy bear I think? Idk, I don’t have a lot of belongings so everything I have, I love and want to keep.

31. You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?

I don’t think I’ve lived a horrible experience. bad ones but not horribles ones. 

32. You got kicked out of the country for being a time-traveling heathen who sleeps with celebrities and has super-powers. But check out this cool shit… you can move to anywhere else in the world!

Uh… weird question but honestly it doesn’t feel very me, so I wouldn’t want to move out of France.

33. The Celestial Gates Of Beyond have opened, much to your surprise because you didn’t think such a thing existed. Death appears. As it turns out, Death is actually a pretty cool entity, and happens to be in a fantastic mood. Death offers to return the friend/family-member/person/etc. of your choice to the living world. Who will you bring back?

I think the deads belong with Death, it’d fuck up ones brain to see someone who isn’t anymore.

34. What was your last dream about?

A coat. I want to make myself one soooo bad.But idk how I want it to be, so it’s hard.

35. Are you a good….[insert anything you’d like here]?

porcupine? No, I’m a terrible porcupine.

36. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital?

Yeah 2 times I’d say. Once I fell off a horse and once I fell of a playground trapeze.

37. Have you ever built a snowman?

Yes! I like it but it doesn’t snow enough :(

38. What is the color of your socks?

Brown, they are handknitted by a friend!

39. What type of music do you like?

here are some stuff i like: 

Uuuuuuuh rap, funk, I really like the Cure, Florence and the machine, Devo, les Wriggles, Renaud (his old stuff because the new stuff is… bad. Really bad.), Zebda, Diana Ross, Earth wind and fire...

40. Do you prefer sunrises or sunsets?

Sunrise! feels magical.

41. What is your favorite milkshake flavor?

I don’t really like milkshakes :/

42. What football team do you support?

None.

43. Do you have any scars?

A few. One on my cheeks looks really badass but it’s from my cat. One on my leg from when I fell off a bike. A few burn ones because I’m not careful around hot stuff, and my work involves hot irons. A new one from a dog bite. And three inked scars (okay, they’re tattoos but technically it’s a scar) 

44. What do you want to be when you graduate?

I graduated  a few weeks ago, so I’d say I want to work in my field. 

45. If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

More confidence! That’s all n.n

46. Are you reliable?

I think I am.

47. If you could ask your future self one question, what would it be? 

Am I cringy rn?

48. Do you hold grudges?

I can put up with a lot, but when I decide I’m done, we’re done.

49. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature, what new animal would you create?

A cat and a shark! 

50. What is the most unusual conversation you’ve ever had?

I have no idea. 

51. Are you a good liar?

I have major anxiety if I don’t feel it’s the right thing to do but I think I can pull it off quite well, I’m a good actress.

52. How long could you go without talking? 

Talking? a day or two if there’s no one around, even though I’d probably start talking to myself. Expressing myself via text or something? A couple hours, not much more n.n

53. What has been you worst haircut/style?

Fringe. Very bad decision.

54. Have you ever baked your own cake?

Yes, of course.

55. Can you do any accents other than your own?

No, very bad at it.

56. What do you like on your toast?

Cheese

57. What is the last thing you drew a picture of?

pants. Ugly, it was to explain something.

58. What would be your dream car?

None, I don't like cars.

59. Do you sing in the shower? Or do anything unusual in the shower? Explain.

No, but after the shower, I need to get most of the water off my skin before using the towel. Otherwise the towel feels too wet.

60. Do you believe in aliens?

I think there’s very little chance we’re the only living (whatever that means) beings in the whole UNIVERSE. That shit’s big.

61. Do you often read your horoscope?

No. I say I don’t believe in astrology but I know a part of me is like “what if”, so I try not to feed it ;)

62. What is your favorite letter of the alphabet?

A because it’s the first letter of my name.

63. Which is cooler: dinosaurs or dragons?

Oh hard one! Dinosaurs are cooler as in 90’s style cool, dragons are cooler as in badass col.

64. What do you think about babies?

Ugh.