#also so many characters die for it being a show about country music??? | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ame-to-ame · 2 months

Text

ok here's my gbc ramble:

first of all. one thing about the 5 members of togetoge is that their appearance showcases personality very blatantly. You take one look and you know what role they're going to play. Tomo *looks* like a tsundere. Subaru *looks* like she's a proper rich lady. Nina *looks* like a kid. It's a design choice that some people might enjoy some people might not. Stereotypes exist for a reason, and i think given the short format of the series + lack of source material to establish characters in a slower fuller way it's understandable for gbc to lean into those stereotypical designs. The con of showing who characters are like before we get to know them is that it's less impactful if it's sort of expected, but having the comfort of knowing what to expect might also be a pro for some.

imo tho i kinda think it's extra understandable bc of how much focus is put on nina's characterization compared to the others. i saw a comment somewhere abt how 40% of gbc is used to characterize nina. I have thoughts on that but touching on that later. My thing really is that it makes other members of the band feel like bg characters or plot devices sometimes. At some moments it feels really like "nina and mmk! and the others". Here are my concerns with some of the characters:

while nina has raw talent and a good voice, subaru isn't as professional as the others. her involvement in the band starts out as an escape from acting. she doesn't have as much of a drive to make it pro initially and is just going with the flow. It makes her a less prominent voice in the band bc she doesn't have a fiery motivator or goal like beating diadust. and she has a way out technically (she's rich). her plot point has ended the moment her grandmother is seen seemingly enjoying tgtg's music. How will gbc keep her relevant in the future or will she just be one of the mediators between nina and mmk?

Rupa. Oh Rupa. Justice for bassists. I cried for her few scenes. But she's got the least backstory explained. Everyone's kinda got a conflict or hurdle they can get over while being supported by the other members of tgtg: nina and her proof of being right/feeling supported, mmk and her anxiety for failing again at her dream from maintaining her own character and voice in her work, 486 needing to come clean about not wanting to act despite the heavy expectations placed on her, tomo being afraid of being critical and wanting others to be serious about their shared goal. What the fuck do you do about Rupa's trauma. "New found family! living without regrets now!" stfu her parents died out of the blue while she was still a child and now she has to act like an adult for a bunch of kids around her age 😭😭😭 She's treated as a foreigner in a very homogeneous country and she has practically nobody but Tomo 😭😭😭 even if she had to grow up quickly and she's handling it well despite circumstances. they are not good circumstances and she'd have all the right in the world to be as angsty as Nina. But instead she's mature and takes care of other people despite unfortunate circumstances. But her snippets of backstory begs so many questions. How did she get into bass? what's her reason for wanting to make it pro, or is it just because she's responsible for Tomo as her guarantor? Her role in gbc is the dependable older sister figure who knows what to say and can do anything. and an alcoholic. So she's like. perfect as a tool to carry things along and lighten things up when the story/infighting is getting a bit too heavy. But she's always in a supportive role. Anyway justice for bassists always in the background never in the front light lmao

Momoka. She's so integral to the story that it's really a shame she loses some personality and charisma later on in the series. You don't quite understand how this could be someone who at least 2 other people in the series with names and faces are die hard fans of when you see how she's constantly at the edge of giving up. She wanted to stay to hear Nina sing because it reminds her of the old her who sang not for money nor fame? Then why try to get her in a band knowing what that does to people (they have to consider popularity and can't just sing what they like) and that being the exact opposite of what she wanted? Just go sing karaoke or post covers/original songs online then. You can sing whatever you want as long when you don't rely on it to survive. In her defense she didn't want to go pro, Nina did. But there's a lot going on and all I can say is that Nina is lucky and tgtg is lucky. And this all could've been prevented if mmk knew how to handle relationships with fans. Do not let a fan Inside your house woman what have we not learned about saesang behavior

But tbh given the format of the series the issues are not damning. 13 episodes of about 20 minutes you have a story to tell so sometimes u gotta do what you gotta do. the characters are still enjoyable. I mean, I cried for Rupa so I think the job was done well enough. looking at the progression of the story the pacing isn't bad: first few episodes are nina running away and meeting mmk forming the three piece and getting nina into band, then adding beni-shouga, trying to decide whether to go pro or not, setting up diamond dust as a rival/goal, resolving family issues for nina bringing it full circle to the start, festival (imo should've ended there! for a good season ending! ep 13 felt like it belonged in season 2 to start out new setting new conflicts). So honestly yeah no the story progression itself feels guided and directional. I also realized that gbc is not one of those series u watch while applying logic. Brain out of the window for this one we watch with raw emotion only. Why is there a bass track when there's no bassist. Why do kyoko and the drummer know how to play the song almost immediately in the first episode (ig they could be really good ig). Why did mmk bring a fan home. How was there not a scandal the next day: former diamond dust member sleeping with fan (17 y/o jk!!). Trying not to think about how realistic things are in the show because it's practically a fantasy based on a modern real life setting atp.

On that note the animation style really does help with characterization and making the characters likeable in little time. I'm typically not a fan of 3d and i prefer 2d, but gbc makes their 3d very fluid and expressive which makes it feel like 2d sometimes. Even while characters are in the background they're still moving and etc which really adds motion to the scene and makes it feel more alive. You get to see little bits of their personality even when the main story beat isn't about them! The expressions really amp up the intensity. personally aesthetic wise i'm not a fan of nina's little red and black spikes whenever she goes angsty because i think the voice actor makes the change pretty apparent, but i understand that it's visually easy to see and understand.

i don't want to word vomit too much so I'll ramble abt nina later bc Oh boy do i have thoughts

#kk rambles #i love being attached to the character with least amount of plot going on for them #justice for bassists lmao #with lovelive too my favorite character was ktr and i got so mad in the end for how they used her to create conflict for the story #but gbc isn't llsif and the focus is mostly on nina's story #oh nina #oh do i have so much to say about her

2 notes · View notes

hopes-peak-postal-company · 9 months

Note

Hey Mod Akane! :)

I‘d like to request match up with a male character from Danganronpa (I‘m fine with all games but if you want a specific one choose V3).

I‘m an INFP and my style consists of comfy clothing (hoodies <3) and band t-shirts.

I‘m female, 5‘3 (161 cm), have long (to the waist) blonde hair, blue eyes, freckles, wear glasses and I am really pale.

I‘m interested in art, architecture, psychology and geography and I also like helping people. My hobbies are reading, drawing, playing video games, listening to music and playing the guitar and cello. I like tea (turkish apple tea tastes so good 10/10 my fav tea), cats, metal (fav band slipknot <3), indie pop, classical, rainy weather, discovering new things and going on walks. Music is my life like I could NOT live without it. :,) I also LOVE horror (games, movies, etc.), especially psychological horror.

I‘m often sarcastic, creative (sometimes? idk) and try to be nice to people. I have huuuuge mood swings and can turn from shy and reserved to very energetic. I like (okay love) being in leadership but I‘m also a huge people pleaser so I kinda don‘t set boundaries for myself. I daydream a lot, I‘m sentimental and open-minded. I also sometimes need a lot of alone time because I get overwhelmed by a lot of things. My toxic traits probably are that I am (like I said) a people pleaser and that I sometimes feel superior over everyone else and can get very arrogant without even wanting to. It occurs less but it still does and I try to work on it. :,)

I‘d like to have a partner who‘s preferably smart, not very loud and open to discover new things with me together. Also someone who shares similar interests and respects that I sometimes need some time to myself.

Hope this was alright and thank you so much :D <3

Yeah, this request is fine and I will happily do it for you.

Your Danganronpa Matchup Is….

Rantaro Amami:

* Rantaro has a few band t-shirts, since his sisters got them for him and would happily give you a few that he can’t fit into anymore

* And he will always let you borrow his hoodies, which often ends up with you keeping some of them anyway

* Now due to him being the ultimate adventurer he has found some very unique art and architecture and is happy to indulge your passion and tell you all about them and sometimes show you pictures of them

* Due to his talent he has probably been to most places, so any questions you have about different places for geography purposes he can probably tell you about them

* Doesn’t know much about psychology though, but silently listens when you talk all about it he will talk about some of the sorts he does know though, but most of his knowledge about psychology is psychological tricks he saw advertised on websites

* Admires how kind you are to help people and will try his best to help you when he can, since it can’t be easy to help everyone out at once, so he is there to lend a helping hand

* Is happy to read a book with you and get into in-depth conversations with you about the plots

* Also comforts you if you get sad when one of the book characters die

* Will go digging around his room to find you new books to read

* He also checks out the libraries on his adventures to find new books to give you, that he finds from them in different countries

* Any pictures you give him he will hang them on the wall in his work space and asks you to help him practice his drawing

* Surprisingly though he is actually a decent drawer from the days he used to draw stuff for school projects to help out his sisters

* He will gladly draw pictures for you as well

* However, no drawing he does will compare to yours, since you have the actual talent for this stuff

* He doesn’t play many video games, so is mediocre at best when you play them together, but he still never refuses an invite to play them with you

* Even though Rantaro is quite a chill person he still gets slightly competitive during a game of Mario kart with you the only game he is really good at playing

* However, he still congratulates you if you end up winning, regardless

* Also gives you updates on new games, especially your favourite horror ones coming out and he picks ones up as well when he goes exploring if they haven’t been released in your country yet

* He doesn’t really have a favourite type of music, so will listen to anything you recommend

* Also let’s you use his Spotify and when you are together you are allowed to just take his phone, go on his Spotify and put on music you like that you both can listen to when sharing headphones

* Has a whole playlist dedicated to metal, classical and indie pop because of you

* And tries his best to get tickets to watch slip knot in person, since he loves it when you are happy

* Thinks your talent of playing the guitar and cello is very cool because he understands the effort that needs to be put in to learn how to play an instrument well

* Any piece you play he will compliment you on how good it sounded and jokingly says how he wants your autograph before other people want it

* He likes to drink tea as well when he is feeling stressed, since it helps to calm him down

* He has also tried a range of different teas on his travels and makes them for you to try, will still always make you your favourite Turkish tea for you though, especially if you are feeling down in the dumps or something

* He us a lot of stray cats that come around his house, so he will gladly take you to meet them, due to your love for cats

* He does dream sometimes about the two of you owning a cat together one day

* As he has gone on loads of adventures he’s the king of having new things to show you, so takes you to random places he’s been to whenever he gets the chance too

* Will gladly go on walks with you as he thinks it is a good bonding experience

* Will definitely always ask you to go on walks when the weather is rainy and will always have an umbrella to put you under or will share his coat with you if you get too cold or wet

* Rents horror movies that the two of you can watch together and let’s you know that you can cuddle up to him if you get scared, but that rarely happens. But he still puts his arm around you regardless anyway

* Rantaro doesn’t really react if he gets scared either he just slightly flinches at jump scares or gets a slight sweat on his forehead and that’s about it

* He will happily reciprocate the sarcasm you give back, growing up with sisters has made him really good at dealing with sarcasm

* If your creative he definitely helps you to nurture it

* He is glad that you are nice to people as he wouldn’t want to be with anyone too mean as he is not like that himself

* Can handle your mood swings like a professional if your in your energetic moods he makes sure to provide things for the two of you to do together or lets you drag him to places

* If you are in one of your shy moods he will deal with people for you if your too shy to say things to them

* Will definitely let you lead him as he is more of a go with the flow kind of guy, so doesn’t mind when you take the lead

* But will intervene if your giving too much to people than you can handle, due to your people pleasing nature and he will set the boundaries you want for you

* If your daydreaming Rantaro doesn’t, even bother to snap you out of your trance and just guides you to wear you need to be and do things throughout the day for you, until you snap back to reality yourself

* He is happy that you are sentimental it warms his heart when you save things he gives to you and appreciates how open-minded you are, since he wouldn’t be able to reciprocate someone who is too judgemental of people

* If you get overwhelmed by things Rantaro will do his best to make them things disappear and be there to comfort you

* But if you need some alone time he will understand and gives you the space you need, trying to stop other people from interrupting your alone time as well

* He will try his best to break you out of your people pleasing habit to stop it from damaging you mentally and physically

* He doesn’t mind if you are arrogant sometimes and always tries his best to wheel you back into reality if you get to arrogant and it’s hurting other people’s feelings

* And he will definitely work on it with you, so you have some help and not alone while working on it

* Rantaro is definitely a smart person as he grew up around his sisters who are unique individuals, so he knows a lot about different topics, due to each of them showing and telling him about their interests

* He is also not very loud as well, due to him being very laid back and not raising his voice very often, even when he is angry, which is very rarely

* He is also open to discover new things with you as that is the whole premise of his talent anyway and he does have similar interests with you, such as geography and his happy to learn more about the topics you are interested in as well

* And he respects that you sometimes need time alone, to yourself

* Overall, Rantaro fits all of the qualities you could want in a man and that makes your relationship together amazing and it forges an unbreakable bond between the two of you.

#danganronpa matchup

2 notes · View notes

seeingteacupsindragons · 2 years

Note

This is the request anon. It's a bit difficult for me to be specific, because to be honest I don't really have a genre preference. I'm the type that will pick up anything that's good and/or fun. I guess I'm looking for books that don't get discussed often? Hidden gems, if your will. Not sure if this helps.

So a lot of these are going to be older, just because I can only read so much, and I don’t know that I’d call them all 5-star reads, but I liked them all at least a little enough to have fun with.

10 Things to Do Before I Die: A YA novel about a neurodivergent teenage music geek dealing with an anxiety disorder, neglectful parents, and some kind of nervous breakdown in dramatic fashion all over NYC.

Bitterwood: The first installment of a series of sci-fi novels masquerading as fantasy. It takes place in a world where dragons rule over humans and humans’ fight to take back some kind of freedom...as well as the various machinations of dragonkinds.

The Fire’s Stone: A standalone novel by queer author Tanya Huff following a traumatized bi man dealing with seriously internalized self-loathing, a bisexual playboy, drunkard prince trying to prove some value to his family, and a aro ace wizard who wants to save herself from an arranged marriage to the prince and learn all she can about magic before taking care of her country.

Mélusine: Is this one obscure? It won a Lambda award, but I also know the series sold so poorly the author rebooted under a different pen name. This is the first of the series The Doctrine of Labyrinths, a very heavy, dense, dark fantasy series with the gorgeous prose about trauma, abuse, mental illness, recovery, and how much damage those things can do to a person and how much damage those people can cause. It follows a wizard trying desperately to repair something he’s being blamed for and yet isn’t precisely responsible for and the brother who’s trying to keep him together and keep himself together. So many trigger warnings apply here. So many. Please look them up before reading this one.

Shatter the Sky: The first installment of a duology, this follows a girl from a colonized homeland trying to rescue the dragons of her heritage and save her kidnapped girlfriend. It’s not a five-star read imo, but it’s a strong debut novel, I think.

Spinning Starlight: A YA sci-fi novel retelling of the fairy tale “The Wild Swans.” I especially like that the love interest doesn’t show up for like the entire first third of the book because our protagonist has Things To Do!!! And he’s honestly a sweetheart.

The Holver Alley Crew: This one is technically part of a series and that series is part of a whole entangled Verse by the author, but you don’t actually have to read any of the rest of them. It’s a fantasy heist novel with very Ocean’s Eleven Vibes and traumatized brothers just trying to do their best to love and support each other. The author says the protagonist is not aro ace and just traumatized, but he kinda reads that way anyway, and there are other aro/ace and queer characters in the world, so that’s kinda nice.

I hope this list hit on something that sounds interesting and you hadn’t heard of. This is just the first stuff that comes to mind. As ever, you can find me on StoryGraph or Goodreads (which is a little outdated now since I switched over) to see what kinds of things I read to mine for recs.

7 notes · View notes

all-the-heart-you-cannot-see · 2 years

Text

REBELDE S2 WAS A HOT MESS (major spoilers ahead)

Plot

I think conceptually speaking having Gus as a villain this season was a good idea. Who can be a bigger enemy to music than s producer only interested in money who exploits his artists? I hated that he died in the end. Biggest wtf of the season, now he exits the next season completely and our mains are left to deal with the fallout in what most likely will be an attempt to copy Elite. Rebelde is about the music and the highschool drama not an student accidentally killing one of the most important producers in the country, what?????

Characters

Esteban was interesting this season, i like that tried to kind of make him the villain. Him getting sucked into Gus bullshit and doing whatever it took to be the best was a nice change from him being really plain last season. I hated him 80% of this seasons runtime but at least this was intentional on the writer's part. I'm so not looking forward to the murder plot with him next season.

Jana works better when she is alone than with Esteban, they make each other lamer, I thought her arc about not having to always please everybody was cool, and i don't think her conflict at the beginning of the season with MJ was nonsensical at all. She's 16, of course she's jealous of someone who could steal her spotlight, not to mention MJ was her friend and left her and the band to go with Jana's shitty ex lol. I like that the girls ended up together at the end and it didn't feel like something forced to me, so many things had happened to them by that point that the reason they were fighting in the first place probably felt stupid anyways.

Dixon is one my favorites lol, this guy is ride or die with everybody. He was willing to keep going with the band, to forgive MJ, he was even trying to help Esteban before he turned into an asshole, i think he's actually the most mature one of the bunch. Whether he was the best in the class depends on personal taste but I think it was well done in the sense that he was the only one to stand up to Gus and remain true to himself as an artist. I like his friendship with Jana cause we almost never get platonic relationship in teen media between girls and boys without feelings being involved, i screamed when they kissed but I hope they keep it as a "we were just too drunk" thing. I liked him with MJ at first, now I think he deserves better.

MJ didn't really have an arc this season, she was just doing her own thing, the actress is a really talented singer so I wish she was more present in the race for Gus's contract. I think she and Sebastian were pretty cute together but I could see their breakup coming from a mile away (more on this in his section). I didn't mind her bit with the pregnancy scare (sin gorrito no hay fiesta, guys) and i just want her to have more to do next season.

Fucking Sebastian. I like to believe that if he knew Gus was such a monumental asshole he wouldn't have done what he did at the end. I thought his arc about being a better person because of MJ was cute however what was wrong from the start is he was changing because of her so I knew the moment she was gone, he was going to go back. My guy just needs therapy and i would have more sympathy for him if his entire villain arc in s1 wasn't based around him being classist lol. (Also I can't believe we were doing the i can fix him in the year of our lord 2022).

I hate what they did to Andi and Emelia. I didn't mind Andi's addiction arc per se because it's pretty common in the music industry, I hate that it made her absent for a pretty good chunk of the major drama this season and that they broke her up with Emelia that way. The thing is, i don't think before the song thing they were actually "bad for each other" their relationship didn't have any major problems before so breaking them up was the most homophobic act of 2022.

Luka is above good and evil in the show, he's kind of an ass but he has been like that since day one and everybody has learned to tolerate him so really, he's just fun. I hope they would've spent more time with him an Okane being actually together but they are only a thing in the last 3 episodes and Luka is literally unconscious in the last one so we were given cruuuuuuumbs. I thought the scarf thing was really cute, I love them, please don't take them away.

I didn't expect much from Okane but he was a pleasant surprise. It's a shame they ruined his storyline with Jana by adding the sex tape thing because he gave her actual good advice (apart from the drugs) and i think they could have s great friendship dynamic, he could certainly make her more interesting. Idk where he went at the end, i just want him to be left alone in this entire bullshit plotline and be happy and home with Luka.

#rebelde netflix #rebelde #rebelde 2022 #luka colucci #okane #jana cohen #mj #dixon alvarez #esteban torres #andi

151 notes · View notes

kunikinnie · 3 years

Note

Hi can I request dad hc for chuuya, dazai and akutagawa if you want to do only one then chuuya please thank you 💕

a/n: time to unleash chaos HAHA not sure if these are entirely in character, but I hope you enjoy! warning: some adult language, mentions of suicide

being dads

Featuring: Dazai, Akutagawa, Chuuya

Dazai Osamu

At first he'd be a bit scared and reluctant to become a father (he knows himself pretty well)

But once he sees the child all fears somehow melt away

You bet he'll be the fun-loving dad

Teaches his children many "practical" things that "won't be taught in school"

I personally believe he's good at playing with them (especially when they're younger)

Will definitely prank his own children regardless of age. Bad habits die hard, they say, but in Dazai's case they just never die

Big chance his children will become pranksters, too much to Kunikida's misfortune

Pretty chill when it comes their schooling. As long as they pass and learn, that's okay with him

Gives excellent life advice, but that's when he actually gives decent ones. 50% of the time what he says is a joke

He'll also probably quit joking about suicide around them, at least

On that note he'll definitely want to listen to them should they have any mental health issues

I think he'll still keep a certain emotional distance from them, but ironically he'd prefer if his kids were emotionally open to him (he really wants them to be happy)

May or may not teach them how to flirt

When someone hurts his kids (verbally, physically, emotionally) they better leave the country lol he's the most menacing out of the three here

He's also 100% the annoying embarrassing dad, especially once his kids are in high school

He must not be, under any circumstances, become part of the PTA or something similar

Overall wants to give his children as many fun memories as possible

Akutagawa Ryuunosuke

He's the most nervous of them all

He hasn't really seen how a good father acts in the first place, and he's worried he might not raise his children properly

Definitely stoic silent dad who wants to say something but is always too embarrassed

Usually Rashoumon does the "speaking" for him

Actually practically uses Rashoumon for everything: picking up children when they go too far, making it some sort of home version of an amusement park ride, threatening any stalkers or unwanted suitors-

Okay maybe not the last one, but still

I think he's the most protective dad compared to the other two. He genuinely wants his children to live happy lives away from any form of 'darkness' and not feel the same despair as he once did

His favorite way of communication with his kids is having afternoon tea with them

Not that he'll talk much, but he likes spending some relaxation time with them

Sheds a single tear whenever they do something for him, no matter how small (he gets touched really easily if it's from them)

I have a feeling this man's a cheapskate. Not that he won't buy good things, but money and other resources must always be used efficiently (ex. always turn of the lights when you're not using them, etc.)

Okay this might be an unpopular opinion, but I think he'll be somewhat of a competitive dad (it's really hard to completely remove that from him come on)

So he wants to make sure his kids do well in whatever they do

Half pressuring them, half talking sh*t about other people-

Okay maybe not the last one, but still

He just wants to show people how amazing his kids are and that he's absolutely proud of them whatever they may be

Nakahara Chuuya

He's not a dad. He's a mom. Soccer mom, if you will

Probably the most fussy when it comes to certain things about his children compared to his partner, if he has any

Their clothes, toys, meals: everything has to pass a certain standard

I mean if you have the money, why not use it? But ofc he's not irresponsible with it all

It's canon he likes music (so let's assume he likes singing, I mean his VA did sing OP 1), so when they're still young he'll definitely be the one to sing them to sleep

Lowkey wishes one of them picks up music too so they can jam together

When If his children pick up on adult language, he will both be horrified and delighted

"Save those for a certain bandaged bastard-"

On a side note, he's the only one on this post who'll allow his kids to keep a dog. He probably is the first one to want one in the first place tbh

Will definitely teach his children how to fight. Chuuya's not the best martial artist in the mafia for nothing

I think he's also pretty chill with their schooling. As long as they're not failing, he won't whoop their ass

He's also very doting, I think. He's the type to get jealous when his kids are more affectionate with other people

Will fight (verbally and/or physically) anyone who has or is about to hurt his children in any way, shape, or form guard dog Chuuya never grew up

He's also the type to cry during any "moving up" event: graduation, marriage, you name it

What can I say he loves them all so dearly. He'll make sure they'll be proud and happy to be part of his family

#bsd #dazai osamu #akutagawa ryuunosuke #nakahara chuuya #dazai x reader #akutagawa x reader #chuuya x reader

336 notes · View notes

kdramaxoxo · 2 years

Note

Hi im new to kdramas and I'm interested in a kdrama that is a romantic comedy and has a good ending any recommendations?

Welcome to K-dramas!

I'm so excited for you - you're gonna have the best time!

Before I select my favorite happy ending rom/coms, here are a couple of lists you might like:

Light & Fluffy K-Dramas with no Melodrama (Updated 10/2020)

Light & Fluffy K-Dramas & Web Dramas (Updated 10/2020)

Light and Fun Rom Coms with Happy Endings:

Below are some of my favorite rom/coms that I feel like everyone new to k-dramas should watch.

Fight for My Way: I love this drama! The couple is one of my OTPs and it’s really funny and a mostly lighthearted story of a group of friends. It’s down to earth and adorable - I’ve never had anyone complain about this one!

Shopping King Louie: Ridiculously fun and lighthearted romp following a spoiled and useless chaebol with amnesia who is being taken care of by a country bumpkin in the city. Very low stakes, super adorable couple, and as many tropes as you can fit in your bag, this one is one of my favorites to recommend.

The Best Hit / Hit The Top: A famous 90′s boyband dude travels into the future and meets up with his family and friends in this really cute drama featuring Yoon Shi Yoon. I LOVE Yoon Shi Yoon in pretty much everything but this role was made for him - he is hilarious. It’s a slice of life but features the k-pop music industry so the setting is unique.

Weightlifting Fairy Kim Bok Joo: A K-drama fandom favorite! Adorable college romance about a female weightlifter and a super hot swimmer dude. I mean she’s hot too. Anyways, two cuties!

Oh My Ghostess: A shy withdrawn girl working at a restaurant possessed by a sassy ghost. Do I need to go on? There is a little bit of sad but for the most part it’s super fun.

Run On: I loved this slice of life drama about an athlete, a translator, a painter and a CEO so much that I have already rewatched it. This drama has so much to offer: Interesting and strong characters, a painter I’d die for and unique friendships. Did I mention there’s a legit ACE character? I mean... AMAZING.

Into The Ring: Seo Gong Myung is a hard nosed civil servant who ends up working with Goo Se Ra, one of my favorite ladies in a K-drama ever. She’s passionately ethical and into civil ordinance complaints (you read that right) which drives Gong Myung crazy, but like, in a “I’m definitely going to fall for you” type of way. This is a hilarious and heartfelt slice of life and I loved it.

Other Great K-drama Essentials I recommend to new viewers:

Coffee Prince: A classic (if 10 years old can be considered a classic) rom com with genderbending. It’s a great drama that really plays up the gay as much as a k-drama of it’s time really can and I loveeeed it so so much.

Healer: Everyone knows healer will always have my heart and it’s a super popular k-drama. Healer is played by Ji Chang Wook (swoon) and he gets involved with a feisty reporter played by Park Min Young (also swoon). It’s an action adventure with some very classic tropes: Rich people scandals, murders and hidden pasts. But it also has some of my favorite tropes: Beta Male Lead, childhood friends to lovers and traumatic pasts.

Extraordinary You/ A Day Found By Chance (fantasy/romance): This magical k-drama has my heart. It plays with all of the predictable tropes and then just goes crazy! While not perfect towards the end, I give this show bonus points for being super creative AND inspiring me to read a LOT of fan fic. I think about this drama more than any other.

Just Between Lovers (romance/melo): Slice of Life romance between poor trauma babies just trying to live! The OTP is one of my favorite couples EVER and even as the years go on, very few couples have matched their love in my opinion. There’s a lot of comfort/healing themes with for me is just *chef’s kiss.* Lee Junho became my bias wrecker because of that drama.

#kdrama #kdrama recommendations #i'm so jealous that anon gets to enjoy #fight for my way #healer #just between lovers #shopping king louie #for the first time!#ask me anything #kdrama recs #i love a list

70 notes · View notes

reidandweep · 4 years

Text

Stitching

Spencer Reid x Reader (female)

A/N- Much like Adam Driver, I have been a huge fan of Matthew Gray Gubler and criminal minds for years. With quarantine, I decided to re-watch the show from the beginning and I had some inspiration. My writing tends to take a while but if you have any requests or idea for Spencer Reid, please send them my way.

Word Count- 6286 words

Warning- Angst, mentions of violence and torture, fluff, tears, and the usual criminal minds details.

If you prick us do we not bleed? If you tickle us do we not laugh? If you poison us do we not die? And if you wrong us shall we not revenge? -William Shakespeare.

QUANTICO, VIRGINIA

“Good morning my lover and friends. As of 8:45 am, yesterday morning, four bodies have been found across the Washington State area. Locations confirmed to be Pomeroy, Baker City, Salem, and Mill Creek. All victims were very similar in physical appearance; Caucasian, red hair, brown eyes, approximately 5ft 4’.”

Garcia swiped her tablet to display family photographs of the victims on the screen. The team watched, in the debriefing room, as they scanned through their own tablets; reading through the details. Spencer’s eyes flittered over the images as his fingers scanned across the words in his paper file; still adamant on not working with technology like the rest of his team.

“What about the cause of death? How were they found?”

Garcia shivered at Rossi’s question.

“It’s not a pretty image. Each victim was dismembered at the elbows, knees, neck, and stomach. Further cuts were made vertically down the stomach and across the face, arms, and legs. Not deep enough to cut through bone, but deep enough to bleed out. Where the unsub cut our victims, he then sewed them back together.”

Emily looked up at Garcia.

“Are you saying the lacerations were made before the victim’s died?”

“Precisely. Each autopsy report came back the same with the cause of death pointing to the direction of blood loss; specifically, from the throat.”

The team looked at the new images before them. Multiple pictures appeared on the screen, showing the bodies of the victims. The pictures showing the women laid out in the same pose, thick thread holding together the pieces of their corpses. All had their eyes closed, except one.

“Garcia, the last victim, zoom into her face.”

Garcia did as Spencer asked.

“Her eyes are closed.”

Spencer nodded, glancing towards JJ as she spoke.

“Meaning that he felt remorse for this murder.”

Derek scrolled through the pictures on his tablet.

“The other three victim’s eyes are open, indicating that he wanted them to look. To watch what he was doing, whatever it may have been.”

Spencer looked across the table at the questioning faces.

“So, what changed between the third and the fourth victim?”

Hotch stood from his seat, indicating the others to grab their belonging.

“We can discuss further on jet. Wheels up in thirty.”

WASHINGTON STATE

Being greeted by the local police department in Clagstone, Spencer and the team began their investigation into the murders. Spencer did not know what it was, but the stitching on the bodies felt familiar. Like he had seen them before.

Looking up from his files, Spencer watched as Derek walked into the room, ending a call with who he could only presume to be Garcia.

“Garcia has just completed background checks on our latest victim. Lily Trent visited local film screenings at the Southview Centre religiously, to watch horror movies in particular. Seems like the girl loved anything horror and Halloween; according to her roommate and her computer history. It seems that are other victims did also.”

Spencer stood from his seat and walked towards the whiteboard at the back of the room. Writing down the details Derek stated, his brain began to filter through the relevant information needed.

“Halloween is ranked the ninth most celebrated holiday in the world. With different interpretations of the holiday occurring according to country and culture. Wearing costumes at Halloween did not even become an occurrence until 1585, with the first instance recorded in Scotland.”

Derek chuckled at Reid’s excitement. He knew the boy loved Halloween.

“Well it all looks like they were pretty huge fans of the holiday and horror films. Maybe our unsub was too.”

Spencer looked down at the photos in his hand, scanning his memory for any correlation.

“Maybe, it’s not just horror, but a particular film. If all the victims were presented in a certain way, maybe the unsub is trying to replicate what happened to a character in a particular film.”

Derek crossed his arms over his chest.

“I’ll call Garcia to search through all the victims search history to see if any particular horror films come up in each one. Do you know of any films that the unsub could have replicated?”

Spencer shook his head.

“I can collate his actions to hundreds of films but, the method of torture and look of the victims, I can’t think of one horror feature that pinpoints all that the unsub has done.”

A thought unexpectedly popped into Spencer’s mind. Derek cocked his head at the sudden halt from the resident genius.

“But I know someone who might.”

UNIVERSITY OF WASHINGTON

“The importance of genre in film alters many of the other aspects. The characters and their narrative arcs, the music score, cinematography, the edit, and so much more. Sometimes genre even dictates the director who signs onto the project. Dennis Dugan would not have a directing career if Adam Sandler stopped making comedy movies. Because that is what he directs. He doesn’t direct comedies; he directs Adam Sandler comedies. Which, in my opinion, are a whole genre on their own.”

The class chuckled.

“Genre plays a part in everyday life. Sometimes, your day will be led by romance, or grief, or action. There may be drama, or comedy, or even silence.”

The class looked on in concentration as Y/N walked across the floor. If someone who did not attend the college walked past the classroom, they could’ve presumed that she was a student. She looked young enough.

“It controls the way the characters talk, act, and move. How the plot thickens and pushes forward and…”

The doors at the back of the auditorium opened. Y/N looked up at the sound of the intrusion to see figures that she could not recognise, and one that she did.

Clearing her throat, she continued.

“And how it even ends. We shall leave it at that today. What I want you to do in the meantime is research a genre in particular and come up with examples that counteract the stereotypes that have been enforced upon the genre itself. Hand it in to your professor first thing Monday morning. Thank you.”

Y/N watched as the students collected their things and filtered out of the room. The figures waiting till she was only left before they walked down the steps.

Coming to a stop in front of her desk, Y/N crossed her arms and waited. Spencer stepped forward with a crooked smile on his face.

“Hi Y/N.”

Y/N couldn’t help but giggle.

“Long time no see stranger.”

Spencer’s cheeks burned at Y/N’s words. The team shared looks between them at the unfamiliar display. They had seen Spencer blush at people before, but not for a long time.

Spencer cleared his throat, preparing himself to act professional.

“This is Dr Y/F/N Y/L/N. Y/N travels across the country to guest speak at different universities on her topic at hand. She specialises in film studies, more importantly the focus of characters and genres. If I can’t connect the unsub’s actions to a film, Y/N most definitely can.”

Y/N smiled at Spencer’s praise.

“Nice to meet you all. So, what are you here to talk to me about Doc? Obviously, you’re here on a case and if you are asking for my help, I’m guessing it’s going to be pretty gruesome.”

Spencer blushed at the nickname; caught off guard by the word slipping of her tongue.

Sending a raised look towards Reid, Hotch began to explain why they were there.

“Were looking into a case of connected murders. All victims were found to have been mutilated and tortured in the same way. As well as showing resemblances in their physical appearances. With research, we’ve found that each victim was particularly fond of horror films and Halloween. We would just like for you to take a look and see if you could recognise if the ways in which they were harmed stemmed from a film in particular.”

Y/N nodded her head.

“Of course, anything to help.”

She reached for the files from Spencer’s hands, ignoring the tablet pushed in her direction by JJ.

“Sorry, I prefer to use paper. I only really use technology for my lectures or to watch films if they cannot be purchased in physical form.”

Derek smirked, shooting looks to his team, as his eyes landed on Spencer. He never thought he would meet a technophobe like Reid.

Y/N scanned through the pictures and documents, looking in detail at the lacerations at hand. She identified the similarities between the victims, as her mind swirled through the images and characters from the films, she knew held similarities.

“What were the names of all the victims?”

Emily looked towards the woman.

“That information is classified.”

Y/N did not blink at her abrasiveness.

“Were any of them called Sally?”

The team looked perplexed at her question.

“No. Why that name in particular?”

Y/N continued to scan the pages as Rossi questioned her.

“Because the unsub isn’t replicating anything from a horror movie. The unsub is replicating the physical appearance and staging of a character from an animated movie. A Disney one to be more specific.”

A light bulb flickered in Spencer’s mind as he stared at Y/N in realisation. The hair colours. The stitches. It made sense now.

“The Nightmare Before Christmas.”

LOCAL POLICE DEPARTMENT

“The Nightmare Before Christmas is a 1993 American stop-motion animated musical Halloween-Christmas fantasy film directed by Henry Selick and produced and conceived by Tim Burton. It became a cult classic during the early 2000s with orchestral concerts occurring every year to celebrate the spectacle of the film.”

Spencer indicated for JJ to change the monitor as he and Y/N stood in front of the team to explain the information.

“Originally, the story began as a poem written by Tim Burton. Both narratives follow the protagonist, Jack Skellington, into his journey to Christmastown, and how he tries to make Christmas his own. The character in question that your unsub is replicating is the love interest of our protagonist. Created by Dr Finkelstein, Sally is a ragdoll-esque character whose body is covered with stitches to keep her together. The form in which all the women were found is identical to this scene in the movie.”

The screen changes to show the scene in question; paused at the precise moment to prover her point.

“All red haired, all Caucasian, all eerily the same. The stitches are exactly the same and the pose in which they are in the pictures are also.”

“We now know which film our unsub is mimicking, but how can we produce a distinguished profile of our unsub? All we can say is that between his third and fourth victim, he suddenly began to feel remorseful of his crimes.”

Y/N looked towards Spencer, waiting for him to speak as he knew more details about the case.

“Garcia checked into the victim’s computer histories and found that all four victims attended a horror convention in the Washington state area over the course of the past month. The convention in particular runs every other weekend, focusing on different horror films to highlight. However, they always make an exception for one film; The Nightmare Before Christmas. Whilst reviewing receipts for the tickets, they were all brought through the convention’s website, which is run by its board of organisation every year. Up until recently, the board has held the same members.”

Derek tapped on his tablet to the convention’s website.

“Last month, the website released details stating that a distinguish member was no longer part of the board due to unforeseen circumstances.”

It suddenly dawned on Y/N who Derek was talking about.

“Dean Faulkner.”

Spencer whipped around towards Y/N.

All eyes laid on her as her breath increased.

“You know him?”

Y/N nodded at Hotch.

“I guest spoke at a panel with him a few years back at a separate university. We were both there, amongst others, to talk about the works of a genre that are expertise were in. I was there to basically provide loose ends for what they could not answer. Dean’s specialised area was horror. The whole time he spoke about what he described as the true villains of horror and of the world.”

Y/N gulped, her mouth going dry.

“Women.”

The wheels began to turn in the team’s heads.

Spencer stepped closer towards Y/N in assurance, seeing that her thoughts were becoming overwhelmed. He quickly stepped back after he realised what he had done.

“He went on a raging tangent about the damsel in distress and the final girl. Going on and on and on about how women are weak and would never be the last one standing if faced against the monsters in real life. How they manipulated the men and made the monsters seem worse than they truly were. The only time he spoke positively about women was when we finally calmed him down and, during a Q&A session, a student asked him who the perfect horror movie character was. He said Sally because she was forgiving and would do anything for Jack; even if that meant falling apart and being sewn back together. I tried to justify that the film does not necessarily fall into the genre of horror. But he rebutted saying that it most definitely did, because of the fact that Jack’s dream did not come true.”

The room was silent for a second, taking in the information.

Suddenly, Y/N grasped the pen from Spencer’s hands. Her finger scribbling across the whiteboard.

“I need to know the names of the victims. Get Penelope on the phone and tell me the names.”

The team shocked at her erratic movements, sat in silence.

“Do you want to capture this guy?”

Spencer licked his lips and repeated the victim’s names.

“Susanna Cole, Alice Dawes, Liberty May, and Lily Trent.”

Y/N swiftly wrote the names on the boards. Each name below the other. Underneath the last name she wrote the letter Y.

“Can you ask Penelope to track any females with the first name beginning with Y who have purchased a ticket to the next convention?”

Derek quickly began to type to her. The rest of the team looking on in disbelief.

“There were twenty-three purchases, but with cross referencing with the similarities in the other victims, one matched. Her name is Yasmine Driver.”

Y/N wrote the name on the board. Circling all the first letters of each name, it became clear there was another connection with the victims.

“Their initials spell Sally.”

Y/N nodded at JJ’s disbelief.

“Reid, when is the next convention being held?”

Spencer diverted his attention to Emily.

“Their schedule every two weeks, so that would make it… tomorrow.”

The team swiftly moved into action.

“JJ bring together the police force for a debrief. Derek and Rossi, go to the convention centre and question the board about Dean. Ask them how often he visited and if they have any knowledge of the victims visits to the convention. Spencer and Emily, contact Penelope for Faulkner’s address. Once you have visited the home, if he is there, bring him in. We’re going to try and catch him before he gets close to his goal. I will locate Yasmine and bring her to the station for safety. We don’t know how far he is going to go and what the end goal of his fantasy is. But we are going to stop him.”

The team swiftly did as they were told, leaving the room with only Spencer and Y/N behind. Just before the door shot, Hotch leaned back in.

“Thank you, Dr Y/L/N, for all your help. If possible, could you stay here with JJ and look through the documents? You know this guy more than we do, so any more information that comes to mind, please let us know.”

Y/N and Spencer watched as Hotch left the room, the door shutting behind him.

As the silence engulfed them, Y/N and Spencer were hyper aware that they were now alone and had been for the first time in weeks.

Spencer swiftly walked towards Y/N and embraced her in a tight hold. Wrapping her arms around the slender man, Y/N breathed in his scent.

“I’ve missed you.”

Y/N chuckled at Spencer’s muffled words, as his head rested on top of her own. Pulling back, Y/N slowly released Spencer, letting her hands drop to her sides.

“I’ve missed you too Doc. We can catch up later, I will be waiting right here. Now, go and save the girl.”

Spencer chuckled at her words but did as Y/N said. Throwing her a smile, Spencer quickly walked out the room, leaving Y/N behind.

Y/N sat in the room, looking over the files as the time passed, waiting to see Spencer return with the rest of the team. A knock on the door startled her from her search.

Looking up at the door, Y/N saw JJ walk into the room with two cups of coffee in her hands. JJ outstretched the one hand, placing the cup in front of Y/N, as she took a seat and began to sip at her own.

“I didn’t know how many sugars you took so I estimated.”

Y/N smiled at the woman’s kindness.

“Thank you. Have you heard anything from the others?”

JJ sat up in her seat as she watched Y/N look over the documents. Her fingers moving across the pages ever so quickly. Her hand that wasn’t tapped continuously on the table in a rhythm.

“Spencer and Emily located Faulkner’s home, but it was vacant. They’re looking around the premises for clues for where he may be; as we speak. Hotch and Derek just called saying they are on their way down with Yasmine now.”

Y/N nodded at her words. Glad to hear that the girl was safe, but the main priority now would be to locate Faulkner. She wanted to truly help them, before anyone else could get hurt.

JJ grabbed her tablet and began to search through the files for any missed out information. Silence befell across the pair, until JJ could not help but ask what they had all been dying to know.

“How did you and Spencer meet?”

Y/N had been waiting for the question. She had seen the looks the team had shared throughout the day. The questioning gazes towards the pair.

“Spencer and I were both guests speaking at the University of California a few months ago. He must have finished his lecture early as he was wondering the halls when he came across the class I was teaching. I was stood on the desk, encouraging the students to do the same. Spencer thought I was a student causing trouble whilst the professor had left the room. He ran in sprouting facts about the percentage of people who fall and severely hurt themselves whilst standing on tables. Telling me that I should get down before he reports me to my professor.”

JJ chuckled at Y/N’s story.

“Sounds like Spence alright.”

Y/N giggled in agreement. As she spoke, Y/N couldn’t help but smile at the memory of their first encounter. JJ noticed the smile on the woman’s face. She knew what that smile meant.

“So, I told him that he better stay there to catch me, just in case I fell, as I was trying to teach my students about the importance of character actions, and how doing something as simple as standing on a desk can amplify the tone of the scene. Like in the film Dead Poet’s Society. Spencer finally realised that I was also a guest speaker and he actually stood there for the next 40 minutes of my lecture. I didn’t need to stand on the desk that long, but I wanted to see if he would stay. Once the lecture had finished, he apologised for jumping to conclusions. I apologised for making him wait for 40 minutes in case I fell. He told me I didn’t make him wait; he chose to. We’ve been in contact ever since.”

Just as Y/N finished her story, the door to the conference room opened once more. Looking towards the door, Y/N watched as Hotch entered, followed by Yasmine. The young woman looked scared, but unharmed.

Y/N stood from her seat, unsure of what to do as Hotch insisted for Yasmine to take a seat.

“Do you want me to leave?”

Hotch nodded his head.

“We shouldn’t be long. The rest of the team are outside in the bullpen. You can go ahead and join them. JJ and I will take it from here.”

Y/N nodded her head, leaving the room. She watched as Hotch and JJ questioned spoke to Yasmine through the glass, before she turned and walked down the corridor to find Spencer and his friends.

Turning the corner, Y/N failed to stop herself before bumping into a tall figure. Looking up to apologise, her eyes suddenly widened at the familiar face. Before a sound could leave her lips, a blunt force knocked her out cold.

Spencer and the team discussed where Faulkner could be when Hotch strode into the bull pen.

“How did it go?”

Hotch walked towards his team, ready to answer Derek’s question.

“It seems that Faulkner had been stalking the victims for some time. Yasmine detailed seeing him turn up at the conventions, even though he was no longer allowed. She had previously complained about his behaviour to the board before his dismissal. Stating that Faulkner had sexually harassed her. Rossi, did anyone at the convention mention anything about Faulkner that we don’t know?”

“It seems that Yasmine wasn’t the only one. The other board members went into detail about why he was fired. It turned out that all of our victims, including Yasmine, had filed lawsuits against Faulkner for sexual harassment. The charges were ultimately dropped and never recorded to keep the convention’s reputation clear. But they fired Faulkner and banned him from being able to attend any further conventions. Taking away the Nightmare Before Christmas dedicated stand was just a coincidence. They felt that the convention needed something new as they had been celebrating the film for over eight years.”

Just as Hotch was about to declare what the next step would be in finding Faulkner, JJ burst through the ball pen.

“Guys, you have to come quick.”

The team, in shock, watched as JJ ran back towards the conference room. All quickly on her heels. Entering the room, she took control of the laptop, streaming the image to the projector.

Spencer could no longer breathe as he looked at the image on the screen.

“Y/N.”

The screen showed Y/N tied to a chair and bent forward; clearly in pain. Her surroundings empty and dark.

Suddenly a voice was heard.

“I sense there's something in the wind. That seems like tragedy's at hand isn’t there Dr Y/F/N Y/L/N.”

The team watched in horror as Dean Faulkner yanked Y/N’s head back, her body letting out a strangled cry at the pain caused by his actions.

Spencer felt sick, he felt like he was watching himself when Tobias Hankel had held him captive.

“Emily, call Garcia to track his location. We don’t have much time.”

Emily did as Hotch told her to. Talking as quickly as she could on the phone.

“She can’t track it; he’s re-routing the IP address every thirty seconds.”

“She needs to track it. She needs to find her now!”

They all jumped at Spencer’s outburst, watching as tears filled his vision and his hands began to shake.

“Spencer, you need to calm down, we are going to find her. He can’t have taken her far.”

Spencer took in Derek’s words. Taking a breath, he looked back at the screen as he tried to distinguish any recognisable features of where she may be.

Faulkner moved his face to rest against Y/N’s hair, smelling the tresses. She tried to pull away only for him to yank her back again.

“Why did you kill them Dean?”

Faulkner let go of Y/N’s hair. Walking to her side, he grabbed her face in a vicious grip. Yanking her to look at him.

“Why? They ruined my life, everything I ever worked hard for. You all did.”

Y/N looked at him in confusion.

“I did nothing to you.”

Y/N’s breath increased at the vicious look he sent her way. Her eyes flickered to the camera, knowing that Faulkner was streaming what was happening to Spencer and his team. She had to find a way to tell them where she was.

“You made them question my authority. My position. My integrity as a member of the board. You ruined my reputation by belittling me in California.”.

“That’s because you know nothing about horror Dean. You think you know everything about it, but you don’t.”

Spencer couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Why was Y/N taunting him?

“Garcia’s looking to see if there’s any abandoned properties around the area that he could have taken her to.”

Spencer didn’t even acknowledge Emily’s words.

Faulkner reeled back at Y/N’s taunt.

“I know everything there is to know about horror. I’ve seen it all. I’ve lived it. I’ve created it. Ask me anything about it, I know the right answers.”

“But you don’t. You have an idea of horror, your own idea, that is wrong. You believe that women are the reason you lost your job and became the monster that you are. But they’re not. The reason you’re a monster is because of your sick and twisted fantasies. You made those girls feel small and weak, didn’t you?”

“Shut the fuck up.”

The team watched in apprehension.

“Garcia, the location, we need it now.”

Rossi looked between the screen and the phone in Derek’s hand.

“I can get the area he’s holding her, but not the specific building. The whole town is basically abandoned. She could be anywhere from a shop to a house.”

“Keep looking.”

Spencer chewed on his lips. He had to think rationally. If the unsub was upset about the changes and losing his job, what could have been the last straw?

“Derek what was the film they replaced Nightmare Before Christmas with at the convention.”

Derek and Spencer shared a look.

“Cabin in the Woods.”

Spencer ran across the rooms to the files at hand.

“In the location that Garcia has tracked her too, there are three cabins, all within a walking distance of the other.”

The team began to rush out the room, transferring the livestream to a tablet so they could monitor Faulkner and Y/N.

“You’re weak Dean. You’re just like all the horror movie villains. Ghostface, pinhead, jigsaw, all of them. You feed of fear and feeling in control. But the only thing you have in common with them is that you’re not going to win.”

Faulkner scream in rage. Pulling Y/N’s head back, he punched her in the jaw. Striding to the camera, he pushed his face to the lens.

“The party’s over!”

Spencer watched in horror as the feed went off.

“Hotch we have to hurry!”

Hotch sped up the car. Quickly arriving to the location, the team split up into pairs, taking a cabin each to inspect. Hotch and Derek, Rossi and JJ, and Spencer and Emily veered off to their targeted locations. Spencer followed Emily, trying to stay calm, as he slowly walked into the cabin to find it empty, when suddenly a gun shot was heard. Looking in the direction, the pair ran to the cabin that Derek and Hotch had been assigned. The rest of the team already there, looking into the cabin in shock.

“No, no, no, no. Y/N.”

Spencer pushed in front of them, tears pooling in his eyes as he a waited to see the horror before him. He looked in disbelief as Y/N stood from her position on the floor, the gun dropping from her hand as they shook. Faulkner laid a few feet away, in a pool of blood, no longer breathing.

Y/N looked towards the team. Raising her shaking hands towards Spencer.

“I didn’t want to kill him but he was going to shoot whoever walked through the door.”

Spencer rushed forward, grabbing her in a bone crushing hug. His hands stroking her hair as he soother her cries. Leading her out of the cabin, he allowed his team to sort out the rest as he continued to calm Y/N down.

The movement of the team were a blur as ambulances and police cars came. Taking them to the hospital as they sat in the waiting room as Y/N was checked over.

Spencer sat in the waiting room, his leg bouncing up and down with nerves.

Derek excused himself from the groups conversation as he went and sat next to Spencer. Clapping him on the back, Derek squeezed Spencer’s shoulder in re-assurance.

“She’s going to be fine pretty boy.”

“Physically, she has a concussion, bruising along her jawline, and needs stitches on her forehead. Mentally, I don’t know how she is going to handle this. When I suggested asking for her help in the case, I didn’t presume the risk of her being hurt. I should have.”

“Spencer, listen to me. We would have done everything to make sure she lived okay. She not only saved herself but she also helped save Yasmine and this team. Any one of us could have been shot if she had not thought fast and got the gun out of his hands. You know, better than anyone, how to help her deal with this.”

Spencer took in Derek’s words, nodding his head in appreciation, as he leaned against his friend in a comforting hug.

“Probably wasn’t the ideal way to introduce your girlfriend to the team though.”

Spencer stuttered at Derek’s teasing.

“We’re profilers Spencer. We’ve all noticed how you’ve been happier these past few months and seeing how persistent you were for us to consult Y/N, it gave us all an idea why. Seeing you together only confirmed our suspicions. So, how long has pretty boy had his pretty girl?”

Spencer chuckled at Derek’s words. Ringing his hands together as he spoke to Derek.

“Tomorrow is actually our six-month anniversary. She was going to be flying back today so we could celebrate; unless I got called on a case.”

“We can still celebrate.”

Spencer looked up as Y/N walked through the waiting room, fresh stitches on her forehead and an ice pack resting in her hands.

“The nurse said that there was no internal damage. That my body will just be sore for a few weeks. My concussion is light, so I am alright to travel home.”

The team gathered around to check on her. But her eyes could not leave Spencer’s as he rose from his seat. Spencer walked forward slowly, his eyes never leaving hers. Carefully he cupped her face in his hands, and to the surprise of Y/N and his team, Spencer bowed his head and placed a careful kiss on Y/N’s lips. Slow, protective, and full of love.

Pulling back, Spencer wrapped his arms around her as he looked at the beaming smiles of his teammates. Y/N couldn’t help the blush across her cheeks or the giggle that followed. Soon, everyone was chuckling at the pair.

“I would like to thank you Y/N. From the entire team. Your actions saved a young woman’s life, and what could have been one of our own.”

Y/N smiled in appreciation at Rossi’s words.

“You’re Spencer’s family. I would do it all again if I had to.”

“Statistically speaking, around 2,000 people a day are reported missing in the US. Approximately, 600 of those would be reported or considered kidnappings. It is highly unlikely for you to be put in a situation like that again.”

Y/N looked up at her boyfriend.

“I never thought I would say this, but your talk about me being kidnapped again is really attractive.”

The team laughed at the girl’s statement, seeing Spencer become physically embarrassed.

“Just to inform everyone, the jet will be ready to depart in forty-five minutes. As I was informed that today you would have been heading home, Y/N we have sent for your belongings to be collected; you can fly back with us.”

Spencer smiled at Hotch in gratitude, the older man knowing he would have only worried if she had flown home alone.

“Thank you, Mr Hotchner.”

Hotch let out a brief smile.

“Call me Hotch. Your part of Spencer’s life, that means your part of this family.”

BAU JET

It had been an exhausting few days for the team, and it showed, as they all were sporadically asleep throughout the jet. Silence encompassed the steel capsule, with only the sound of sleep filled breaths being heard.

Y/N laid fast asleep, with her head on Spencer’s shoulder, as the boy genius sat up wide awake. Looking down at the woman next to him, all Spencer could imagine was what could have happened if they weren’t quick enough. How many days he would have lost with her. All the things he wanted to tell her.

As though she could sense his deep thoughts, Y/N slowly awoke, rubbing her eyes as a yawn escaped her mouth. Blinking her eyes rapidly, she waited till she was fully conscious before she spoke.

“What time is it Doc?”

Spencer jostled out of his thoughts to check the watch on his wrist.

“It’s 2:36 am. You’ve been asleep for approximately 3 hours and 22 minutes.”

Y/N quickly sat up in her seat, wide awake.

Spencer turned towards her in worry, wondering what had made her so alert.

“What wrong? Are you feeling nauseous? Do you need some painkillers, as your due to have…”

Y/N grabbed Spencer’s face and placed her lips flush against his own. Their mouths moved in unison, as Spencer’s own hands moved to circle around her waist, bringing their bodies as close as they could be in the small space they had. They hadn’t kissed since the hospital, and before then it had been weeks. Spencer never realised until then, how much he truly missed her touch, her taste, her as a whole.

Coming to a point where they both lacked breathe, the pair pulled apart. Their eyes fluttering open as Y/N’s hands caressed Spencer’s face. Her one hand travelled to his hair, feeling the tresses that had grown since she had last seen him. She looked at him in a way no one had before. Spencer shared the same expression.

“Happy six-month anniversary Spencer. I love you.”

Spencer looked at Y/N in disbelief.

“Before you start spouting of facts about transference and how I am probably only saying this because you saved my life, you’re wrong. Because then I would be telling Hotch and Morgan the same thing.”

Spencer couldn’t help the watery smile that graced his face. For the second time in the past day, his eyes filled with tears. But this time, they were good.

“I’ve known I have loved you for a long time. For five months actually. I knew I loved you when we made pizza in your apartment and we ended up burning it, so we ordered one instead.”

Spencer laughed at the memory. It was the first time Spencer had initiated their make out. He had watched her cooking, in his apartment, and he had never found her more attractive than he did seeing her in his home.

“I knew that whilst you were spouting of facts about the invention of the pizza that I loved you and that I could listen to you forever. I love you Spencer.”

Spencer pulled Y/N closer to him as he rested his forehead against her own. The pair basked in each other’s presence.

“Past surveys show that men wait just 88 days to say those three little words to their partner for the first time, and 39 percent say them within the first month. Women, on the other hand, take an average 134 days. You knew after 31 days that you loved me. I knew after our first date that the way I felt when I was with you is a feeling that I could not even describe with my vast vocabulary. I knew after 8 days that the way I felt was stronger than liking you and that was a frightening thought. But its scarier to think what could have happened to you yesterday. That I could have lost you without you ever knowing. I made that mistake before. I will never make it again. I love you too.”

Y/N couldn’t help the smile and giggle that overtook her. Spencer, feeling high of the serotonin that was coursing through his body, couldn’t help his laugh either. Soon the pair were a giggling mess, unaware of the team who had all begun to awaken whilst the pair were talking.

The team congregated to the back of the jet, allowing the couple to stay in their own bubble.

“It’s been a long time since we’ve seen him truly happy.”

The group nodded at Emily’s words.

JJ smiled as she watched her best friend rattle of the possible movies that he and his girlfriend could spend their anniversary watching as she recovered. Her smile growing even wider at Y/N’s enthusiasm to watch the film’s in their original language. None of them could miss the look of adoration beaming between the pair.

“Yeah, it really has.”

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage. -Lao Tzu

A/N- It isn’t the best but I really enjoyed writing this one.

#spencer reid imagine #spencer reid #criminal minds #spencer reid x reader #criminal minds imagine #matthew gray gubler #matthew gray gubler imagine #matthew gray gubler x reader #criminal minds x reader #spencer reid imagines

5K notes · View notes

unpopularwiththepopulace · 3 years

Text

Don’t I Get a Dream for Myself ? – Bernadette Peters and the 'Gypsy' Saga

Gypsy. It’s perhaps the most daunting of all of the projects related to Bernadette Peters to try to grapple with and discuss. It’s also perhaps the most significant.

For someone notoriously guarded of her privacy and personal life, careful with her words, and selective of the questions she answers, the narrative around this show provides some of the most meaningful insights it is possible to derive in relation to Bernadette herself. The show’s ability to do this is unique, through the way it eerily parallels her own life and spans a large range in time from both Bernadette Peters the Broadway Legend, right back to where it all began with Bernadette Lazzara, the young Italian girl put into showbusiness by her mother.

The most logical place to start is at the very beginning – it is a very good place to start, after all.

(Though no one tell Gypsy this, if the fierce two-way battle with The Sound of Music at the 1960 Tony Awards is anything to be remembered. Anyway, I digress…)

Gypsy: A Musical Fable with music by Jule Styne, lyrics by Stephen Sondheim, and book by Arthur Laurents, burst into the world and onto the New York stage in May of 1959. After closing on Broadway in March 1961, Ethel Merman as the world’s original Mama Rose herself led the first national tour off almost immediately around the country. Just a few months later, a second national touring company was formed, starring Mitzi Green and then Mary McCarty as Rose, to cover more cities than the original. It is here that Bernadette comes in.

A 13-year-old Bernadette Peters found herself part of this show in her “first professional” on-the-road production, travelling across the country with her older sister, “Donna (who was also in the show), and their mother (who wasn’t)”.

The tour played through cities like Philadelphia, Chicago, New Haven, Baltimore and Las Vegas before closing in Ohio in 1962. Somewhat uncannily, its September 1961 opening night in Detroit’s Schubert Theatre even returns matters full circle to the 2003 revival and New York’s own Schubert Theatre.

Indeed this bus-and-truck tour was somewhat of a turning point for Bernadette. She’d later remember, “I mostly thought of performing as a hobby until I went on the road with Gypsy”.

But while this production seminally marked a notable moment for the young actress as well as the point where her long and consequential involvement with Gypsy begins, it’s important to recognise she was very much not yet the star of the show and then only a small part of a larger whole.

Bernadette was with the troupe as a member of the ensemble. She took on different positions in the company through the period of nearly a year that the show ran for, including billing as ‘Thelma’ (one of the Hollywood Blondes), ‘Hawaiian Girl’, and additional understudy credits for Agnes and Dainty June.

The above photo shows Bernadette (left) with another member of the ensemble (Sharon McCartin) backstage at the Chicago Opera House as one of the stops along the tour. Her comment on the stage of the Chicago theatre – “I’d never seen anything so big in my life!” – undeniably conveys how her experiences were new and appreciably daunting.

Along the tour, she assumed centre-stage once or twice as the understudy for Dainty June, but playing the young star was not her main role. Unlike what more dominant memory of the story seems to purport.

Main credits of June went instead to Susie Martin – a name and a tale of truth-bending that’s now well-known from Bernadette’s concert anecdotes. While performing her solo shows as an adult and singing from Gypsy, Bernadette has often been known to take a moment to penitently atone for historical indiscretions of identity theft or erasure where her mother long ago conveniently left out the “understudy” descriptive when putting down Dainty June on her resumé, in an effort to add weight to the teenager’s list of credits.

Whatever happened to Susie Martin? – many have wondered. Well, she soon left the theatre. But not before appearing in two more regional productions of Gypsy and a 1963 Off-Broadway revival of Best Foot Forward with Liza Minnelli and Christopher Walken.

Bernadette too went on to other regional productions of Gypsy. She spent the summer of 1962 in various summer stock stagings with The Kenley Players, like in Pennsylvania and Ohio, and this time she did indeed get to play June.

Above shows photos from different programmes for these productions. While some may have featured odd forms of photo editing, they at least also bring to attention Rose here being played by none other than Betty Hutton.

The two women couldn’t have been in more different positions when they coalesced in these rough-around-the-edges, small-scale productions. A young Bernadette was broaching summer stock in starting to take on bigger roles in the ascendency to her bright and long career. Meanwhile, Betty found herself there while navigating the descent that followed her sharp but fickle rise to Hollywood fame in the ‘40s and early ‘50s. Top billing Monday, Tuesday you really are touring in stock after all.

While details aren’t plentiful for these productions, it was recounted Betty apparently struggled in performing the role. And understandably so. Following the recent traumatic death of her mother in a house fire, and the birth of her third child shortly before the shows began, it’s not hard to see why her mind might have been elsewhere. Still, she was apparently impressed enough by the younger actress who turned in one of the show’s “creditable performances” to make comment that she would’ve liked Bernadette to play her if a movie were made about her life.

Bernadette might not have done this exactly, but she did go on to revitalise Betty’s best-known movie role, when stepping into Annie Oakley’s shoes in the 1999 Annie Get Your Gun revival. With Bernadette’s first Ethel Merman show under her belt, the ball was soon rolling on her second.

The 2003 production of Gypsy was imminently beckoning as her next successive Broadway musical and it was Arthur Laurents who lit the match to spark Bernadette’s involvement. Laurents, as the show’s original librettist, drove the revival by saying he “didn’t want to see the same Rose” he’d seen before. Going back to June Havoc’s description of her mother as “small” and a “mankiller”, and Arthur’s take that Bernadette sung the part “with more nuance for the lyrics and the character than the others”, the choice of Bernadette was justified. Moreover, “Laurents – whose idea it was to hire her – [said] going against type is exactly the point,” and Sam Mendes, as director, qualified “the tradition of battle axes in that role has been explored”.

So Bernadette also had her own baseline of innate physical similarity to the original Rose Hovick, in addition to her own first-hand memories of the women she’d acted alongside as Rose in her youth to bring into her characterisation of the infamous stage mother.

But there was a third factor beyond those as well to be considered in the personal material she had access to draw from for her characterisation. Namely, her own real life stage mother.

Marguerite Lazzara did share traits with the character of Rose. She too helped herself to silverware from restaurants, and put her daughters in showbusiness for the vicarious thrill. Marguerite had “always wanted to become an actress herself”, but had long been denied her desire by her own mother, who likened actresses to being as “close to a whore as you could be without, you know, getting on your back”.

In that case, to “escape a housewife’s dreary fate in Ozone Park”, Marguerite channelled her latent dream through her pair of young daughters instead, shepherding them out along the road. Thus was produced a trio of the two children ushered around the theatre circuit by the driven mother, forming an undeniable parallelism and a mirror image of both Bernadette’s reality and Gypsy’s core itself. Bernadette didn’t see some of these familial parallels at the time when she was a child, considering “maybe I didn’t want to see” – “didn’t want to see a mother doing that to her daughter”.

It was coming back to the show as an adult that helped Bernadette resolve who her mother was and some of the motivations that had propelled her when Bernadette was still a child. She realised, “I think she thought she was going to die very young”, as her own father died young. So “she was rushing around to get as much of her life as she could in there”.

When she herself returned to the production in playing Rose, Bernadette conceded to sometimes bringing elements of her mother and her driven energy into her portrayal, and admitted too she looked “like her a lot in the role”. You can assess any familial resemblances for yourself, from the images below that show a young Marguerite next to Bernadette in costume as Rose, and then with the pair backstage in 1961 in a dressing room on the tour.

Marguerite was ambitious. From her own personal position and with the restrictions imposed upon her, it was ambition that materialised through her children. Irrevocably, she altered them. She placed Bernadette on TV as a very young child (“I was four when my mother put me in the business”); changed her daughter’s surname (“She told me my real name was too long for the marquees,” or really – “too Italian”); doctored her resumé (“Somehow the word ‘understudy’ vanished. ‘No one will know,’ said Marguerite”); and lightened her hair (“She’d say, ‘Oh, I’m just putting a little conditioner on it.’ But slowly my hair got blonder and blonder!”). All in the hope of giving her child a more favourable chance at the life she’d always wanted for herself.

On paper, a classic stage mother. “When I was a kid, she fulfilled herself through me,” Bernadette would say. “She put me into show business so she could get a taste of the life herself.”

But it’s important to consider Bernadette often qualifies that her mother wasn’t as brutal as Rose, nor was she herself as traumatised as June.

Bernadette didn’t begrudge her mother for her choices – at least by the time she was an adult, she’d rationalised them, explaining “naturally it was more exciting [for her] to go on the road with me than staying home and keeping house”.

As a child, Bernadette hadn’t necessarily wanted to be on stage, but there was a sense of ambivalence – not resentful belligerence – as she “didn’t care one way or the other” when she found herself there.

Like June, Bernadette may have been entered into and coaxed around a path she hadn’t voluntarily chosen. But unlike June, Bernadette had a deal with her mother that “she had only to say the word”, and she could leave.

Most crucially, she never did.

But that’s not to say Bernadette was enamoured with acting from the beginning.

She seemed to feel ‘outside’ of that world and those in it. And others saw it too.

It was in 1961 in Gypsy that Bernadette first met Marvin Laird – her long-time accompanist, conductor and arranger. The way he put it, he “noticed this one young girl, very close with her mother” who, during breaks, “didn’t mix much with the other girls”.

Beneath the effervescent stage persona, there’s a quieter and more reserved reality, and a sense of separation and solitary division.

When asked by Jesse Green in 2003 for the extensive profile in The New York Times if she thought her experiences on the road in Gypsy were good for her at that age, she gives a curious, somewhat abstract, predominantly dark, potentially macabre, response. He wrote:

She doesn’t answer at first but seems to scan an image bank just behind her eyes for something to lock onto. Eventually she comes out with a seeming non sequitur. “I didn’t know how to swim. I remember, in Las Vegas, I fell in, once, and they thought I was flailing, but I felt like: ‘It’s pretty down here!’ I might have been dying and I was thinking: ‘Look at the pretty color!’ And suddenly my fear of water was gone, and I could have stayed in forever.” After a while, I realize she’s answered my question. Then she dismisses the image: “But I had to get my hair dry for the show that day, so up I came.”

I’m still not entirely sure I know what she’s trying to convey here. My interpretation of this anecdote changes as I have re-visited and re-examined it on multiple occasions at different time points. It’s arguably multiply polysemic.

Was she simply swept up in a moment of childlike distraction, lost in the temporary respite alone away from the usual noise and clamour? Was she indicating comprehension that her feelings and perspectives came secondary to any practical necessities and inevitable responsibilities? Was she using the water to depict a muffling and fishbowl-like detachment from others her age who got to live more ‘ordinary’ lives in the ‘normal’ world above that she felt separate from? Was she referencing the pretty colours she saw as a metaphor for show business and how she became bewitched by them even despite potential dangers? Was she trying to legitimately drown herself, or at least exhibiting an ambivalence again as to whether she lived or died, because of what the highly pressurised demands on her felt like?

The underlying sentiment through her response in answer to Green’s primary question was that, in essence – no. Being a child actor was not “over all, a good experience for a youngster”.

Acting might have been something she fell in love with over time, but not all at once, not right from the beginning, and not without noting its perils.

It was a matter of accidental circumstance that landed Bernadette in the show business world to begin with at such a young age in the first place – “I just found myself here,” she would offer.

Her mother, who was “always crazy about the stage”, “insisted” that her sister, Donna take lessons in singing, dancing and acting.

A further point of interest to note is that, although it was Bernadette with her new surname who would grow up to be the famous actress, look to the cast lists from the 1961 touring production of Gypsy that featured both sisters in the company (see photo below) and you’ll find no ‘Lazzara’ in sight. Donna too, appearing under the novel moniker of “Donna Forbes”, had also already become stagified (nay, ethnically neutralised?) by her mother. As such it is clearly demonstrated that Marguerite’s intention at that point was to make stars of both her daughters. Correspondingly so, when her sister returned from her performance lessons some years before, “Donna would come home and teach me what she had learned,” Bernadette remembered. She may have gotten her “training second hand”, but the key element was that she got it.

For Bernadette, it was a short jump from emulating magpied tricks from her sister as well as routines from Golden Age Busby Berkeley musicals on the ‘Million Dollar Movie’ in front of the TV screen, to her mother getting her on the other side of the screen and actually performing on TV itself – belting out Sophie Tucker impressions aged five for all the nation to see.

The photos below show Bernadette in performative situations at a young age (look for criss-crossed laces in the second for identification).

“At first, as a toddler, Bernadette enjoyed performing; it came naturally, a form of play that people inexplicably liked to watch.” It was “just a hobby” and she “wanted to do it”.

But while she may not have detested it, she didn’t entirely comprehend what was going on either. “I didn’t even know I was on TV,” she said. “I didn’t know that those big gadgets pointed at me were cameras and that they had anything to do with what people saw on the television set.”

When she started gaining more of an awareness of how “such play [was being] co-opted for commercial purposes”, she grew less enthralled. “She didn’t care for the bizarre children, accompanied by desperate mothers, she began to see at auditions: ‘They spent their whole time smiling for no reason, you know?’”

Being a child who had become sentient of being a child performer began to grow wearisome and grating to the young girl who had her equity card, a professional (and strange, new) stage name, and an increasingly long list of expectations by the time she was nine. There’s a keen sense she did not enjoy being in such a position: “I wouldn’t want to be a child again. When you’re a child, you have thoughts, but nobody listens to you. Nobody has any respect for you”.

Gypsy did indeed mark a turning point for Bernadette as mentioned above – but not just in the way that seems obvious. Looking back at it now, it does appear the monumental turning point at which she started appearing in significant and reputable productions, beginning what would be the foundation to her ‘professional’ career. However it was also the turning point after which she nearly quit the business altogether.

When she returned from performing in Gypsy, Bernadette felt like she’d had enough. One way of putting it was that she “then retired from the business to attend high school”, wanting to have some semblance of a normal scholastic experience “without the interruptions”. But whatever dissatisfaction she was feeling as an early adolescent on stage, she didn’t resolve at school – going as far as saying that while at Quintano’s School for Young Professionals, “she was in pain”.

“When you’re a teenager you’re too aware of yourself,” she recalled. Being a teen and trying to come to terms with of the expectation of the ‘60s that “you are supposed to look like Twiggy, and you don’t, you feel everything is wrong about you”. Everything “was all about tall, skinny, no chest…[and] hair straight”. Little Bernadette with her “mass of [curly] hair and distracting bosom”, as Alex Witchel put it, was never going to fit that mould. “That was not me,” she stated. “At all.”

Her self-consciousness grew to the point that it became overwhelming and asphyxiating. “I was trying desperately to blend in and be normal, but that doesn’t allow creativity to come out,” Bernadette said. “I knew I was acting terrible. The words were sticking in my mouth and all I could think about was how I looked”. It was hard enough just to look at herself (“I didn’t like what I saw in the mirror”), let alone to have other people gawk at her on stage. So she stopped trying. She “didn’t work much from age 13 to 17” in the slightest. Bernadette would later reflect in 1981 in an atypically open and vulnerable interview, “I was very insecure. Insecurity is poison. It’s like wearing chains”.

It was a combination of factors that helped her overcome these feelings of such toxic and weighty burden to draw her back into the public world of performing and the stage. “The two people who helped her most, she says, were David LeGrant, her first acting teacher, and her vocal coach, Jim Gregory.” Jim helped with “[opening] a whole creative world for [her] with singing”; and it was David who’d give her the now infamous and often (mis)quoted line about individuality and being yourself.

Having these kinds of lessons, she reasoned, was “really a wonderful emotional outlet for a kid of 17”. The process of it all was beneficial for her therapeutically – “you have a lot of emotions at that time in your life, and it was great to go to an acting class and use them up”. And Bernadette felt freer on stage than she did out on her own in the ‘real world’, saying “[up there] I don’t have to worry about what I’m doing or saying because I’m doing and saying what I’m supposed to be doing and saying”.

Finally then and with considerable bolstering and support, she grew comfortable with the notion of being visible on stage and in public, and realised she was never going to blend in as part of the chorus so it was simply better to let go of such a futile pursuit.

David LeGrant’s guiding advice to Bernadette (“You’ve got to be original, because if you’re like everyone else, what do they need you for?”) wasn’t just a trite aphorism. For her, it was a life raft. It was the key mental framing device that allowed her to comprehend for the first time that she might actually have intrinsic value as herself. And that it was imperative she let herself use it.

She had always stuck out, yes, but she had to learn how to want to be seen – talking of it as a conscious “choice” she had to make when realising she did “have something to offer”.

Thus soon after Bernadette graduated, she stepped back into productions like in summer stock and then Off-Broadway as she made her debut at that next theatrical level at 18. It wasn’t long before she was discovered in what’s seen as her big break in the unexpected smash hit, Dames at Sea. And so Bernadette Peters, the actress, was back. And she was back with impact and force.

Besides, as she’s also said, she couldn’t do anything else – “if I ever had to do something else to earn a living, I’d be at a total loss”. An aptitude test as a teenager told her so apparently, when she “got minus zero in everything except Theater Arts”. So that was that. Her answer for what she would’ve done if she’d never found acting is both paradoxically exultant and macabre – “I don’t know, probably shot myself!”

Flippant? Maybe. Trivial? No.

Acting is thus undoubtedly related highly to Bernadette’s sense of purpose and self-worth. This is what makes it even more apparent that a show with such personal and historical connections for her, as in Gypsy, was going to be so consequential and impactful to be a part of again as an adult and perform on a public stage.

She’s called inhabiting the role of Rose in the 2003 revival many things: “deeply personal”, “life changing”, “like going through therapy” – to name a few.

In interviews regarding Gypsy and playing the main character, when asked what she had learnt, Bernadette would frequently say something like, “It taught me a lot”. Pressed further about specifics, her answers often hem close to vague platitudes as she maintains her normal tendency of endeavouring to keep her privacy close to her chest.

On one occasion, she actually elaborated somewhat on what she’d learnt, giving a fuller answer than the question is normally afforded anyhow. Beyond all it revealed to her about her mother, she extended to admitting “my capacity for love and my capacity for anger” as aspects in her that the show had permanently altered. Moreover, Rose to her was undoubtedly the “most rewarding and fulfilling acting experience” she had ever had.

But while such deep, personal and emotional depths and memories were being stirred up beneath the surface in private, she was getting vilified in public singularly and repeatedly by New York Post columnist, Michael Riedel.

Even before she’d set foot on stage, Riedel set forth in motion early in the 2003 season a campaign of vocal and opinionated defamation against Bernadette as Rose that she was miscast, insufficiently talented, and would be incapable of executing the role.

Too small, too delicate, too weak, too many curves (and too much knowledge of how to use them). Not bold enough, not loud enough – not Merman enough. Chatter and speculative dissent begun to grow in and around the Broadway theatres.

For such a prestigious and historic musical theatre role, it was always going to be hard to erase the large shadow of an original Merman mould. Ethel was woven into the very fabric of the show, with the rights to Gypsy Rose Lee’s memoirs being obtained at her behest in the first place, and the idiosyncrasies of her voice having been written into the songs themselves by their very authors.

To step out from such a domineering legacy would be a marked challenge at the best of times. Let alone when battling a respiratory infection.

Matters of public perception were certainly not helped when Bernadette then got ill as the show started its preview period and she started missing early performances.

Nor did it help with critical perception that the Tony voting period coincided so synchronously with Gypsy’s first opening months – giving Bernadette no time to recover, find her feet, and settle more healthily into the show for the rest of the run before the all important decisions were made by that omnipotent committee.

The tale of her illness is actually undercut by a more innocent and unsuspecting origin than you’d expect from all the drama and trouble it engendered. Bernadette decided nearing the show’s opening to treat herself to a manicure. In the salon, she was next to a woman very close to her with a frightful sounding cough. Who could’ve known then that this anonymous and inconspicuous lady through a fateful cause-and-event chain would go on to play such a part in what is among the biggest and most enduring Tony Awards “She was robbed!” discourses? Or even more broadly – in also arguably playing a hand in the closure and financial failure of an $8.5 million Broadway show after its disappointing performance at the Tony Awards that ominously “[spelled] trouble at the box office” and led to its premature demise?

Bernadette did not win the Best Actress in a Musical Tony that night on June 6th 2004. The award went instead (not un-controversially) to newcomer Marissa Jaret Winokur for Hairspray.

She did however give one of the most indelibly resonant and frequently re-referenced solo performances at the awards show just before she lost – defying detractors to comprehend how she could be unworthy of the accolade with a rendition of ‘Rose’s Turn’ that has apocryphally earned one of the longest standing ovations seen after such a performance even to date.

Even further and even more apocryphally, she reportedly did so while still under the weather as legend as circulated by musical theatre fans goes – performing “against doctor’s orders” with stories that have her being “afflicted with anything from a 103-degree fever, to pneumonia, to a collapsed lung”.

Seeing then as unfortunately there is no Tony Award speech to draw on here, matter shall be retrieved fittingly from that which she gave just a few years earlier in 1999 for her first win and previous Ethel Merman role in Annie Get Your Gun to wrap all of this together.

As has been illustrated, there are many arguably scary or alarming aspects in Bernadette’s Gypsy narrative. There’s undeniably much darkness and an ardent clamouring for meaning and self-realisation along the road that tracks her journey parallel to the show. But unlike Rose’s hopeless decries of “Why did I do it?” and “What did it get me?”, there was a point for Bernadette.

As her emotional tribute in 1999 went: “I want to thank my mother, who 48 years ago put me in showbusiness. And I want to finally, officially, say to her – thank you. For giving me this wonderful experience and this journey.”

Whatever all of this was, maybe it was worth it after all.

72 notes · View notes

chitto · 3 years

Text

I ANALYZED ALL OF THE NEW SONGS ON RANBOO'S LORE PLAYLIST - HERE'S WHAT I FOUND

Back in March, I listened to every single song on Ranboo's DMCA Lore Playlist. I came up with a solid theory, published my evidence and that was that. My work was done.

But nope! Ranboo's back and he's deleted a ton of songs and added more. And so I listened. Again. And I'm back with a theory, and it does not look good.

This new batch of songs shows us that this is a new era of c!Ranboo. Redesign Your Logo is meant to tell us that things are changing, and so is c!Ranboo. This could be do to the fact that something bad is most likely going to happen to c!Ranboo in the near future, probably the taking of his first canon life. Songs like Eyewishes and Goodbye heavily point to the ending of a chapter (or life) of c!Ranboo. The song Blue Monday isn’t anything revolutionary, as we were already well aware of the toxic relationship between c!Ranboo and c!Dream. Another thing to point out is that Everybody Wants To Rule The World sets up an interesting take on nuclear weapons, a thing that c!Tubbo has and c!Ranboo doesn’t know exists. If c!Ranboo were to find out about the nukes, it could lead to the two fighting over whether or not they were a good thing. Going into Time Moves Slow, the narrator there discusses a relationship that just ended between them and their lover, meaning there could be a c!Beeduo divorce arc in the near future.

Below are the analyses on each individual song and the added and deleted songs

Deleted: Prologue (StarKid), Introduction to the Snow (Miracle Musical), Dream Sweet in Sea Major (Miracle Musical), Turn the Lights Off (Tally Hall), The Mind Electric (Miracle Musical), The Ruler of Everything (Tally Hall), Ain't No Rest for The Wicked (Cage the Elephant), The Bidding (Tally Hall), Stranded Lullaby (Miracle Musical), Hidden in the San (Tally Hall), & (Tally Hall), I'm Gonna Win (Rob Cantor).

Added: Redesign Your Logo (Lemon Demon), Everybody Wants to Rule the World (Tears for Fears), Blue Monday (New Order), Eyewishes (Lemon Demon), Bystanding (Lemon Demon), Goodbye (Bo Burnham), Time Moves Slow (BADBADNOTGOOD and Samuel T. Herring).

Redesign Your Logo (Lemon Demon) - This song is about a pdf that went around during 2009 about the Pepsi company logo. In it, the Arnell group is trying to sell Pepsi a new logo, so that they can make tons of money. I feel that this song symbolizes evolution and growth, we’re entering a new era of c!Ranboo. He’s redesigned and rebranded. This song could also be on this playlist because of a fan animation on youtube set to the same song by Shyshui.

Everybody Wants To Rule The World (Tears for Fears) - This song was written about the Cold War between The Soviet Union and The United States that happened during the 20th Century. The main line of the song ‘Everybody Wants to Rule the World’ is about how everyone wants power, and the misery that it brings with it. This is a theme we can see clearly on the DreamSMP, with many leaders such as c!Eret, c!George, c!Bad, c!Wilbur, and c!Dream all leading lives of misery in one way or another. This is also important for c!Ranboo, as he is the most powerful man on the server. It tells us that his power will soon be his misery. Also a small little thing I’d like to point out is the line ‘Say that you’ll never, never, never, never need it’ which is meant to be about the use of nuclear devices during that time period. Many governments had them but claimed they would only use them if another country was launching a nuclear attack. This could translate to c!Tubbo owning nukes and c!Ranboo possibly finding out, which could cause discourse between the two.

Blue Monday (New Order) - Blue Monday is about the singer pondering the mistreatment of their person by someone they trusted. The person seems to be manipulative and toxic for the singer but the singer is too far under their control to leave them. Immediately we can tell that this song is most likely about the relationship between c!Ranboo and c!Dream. c!Dream uses c!Ranboo as his errand boy, making him do all sorts of tasks, although this hasn’t really happened since the Disc War Confrontation. However, we know the c!Dream still has some sort of hold over c!Ranboo because we saw c!Sapnap trigger an Enderwalk episode by giving c!Ranboo a message from c!Dream.

Eyewishes (Lemon Demon) - Eyewishes is a song about a distraught man who has no eyelashes, as he used them all on wishes, and now he can make no more wishes. The man pours out his frustrations and then resolves to committing suicide. While I don’t believe c!Ranboo would take his own life, I believe that he soon will die. The last line of this song is ‘So take care of my plants and pets and now I’ll say good-’. c!Ranboo has many pets in his care and he would want them taken care of after he dies. I could see him saying this line to a character like c!Tubbo. However, c!Ranboo is still on three canon lives and would not perma died if killed.

Bystanding (Lemon Demon) - Bystanding is the direct sequel to Eyewishes, starting off with bi, completing the phrase ‘goodbye’ started at the end of Eyewishes. Other than this, the song has no real points of interest as it’s just the singer repeating different words, working his way up from 2 to 5.

Goodbye (Bo Burnham) - I’m going to split this song up into two sections, just because I think there’s a lot to cover here. Let’s start pre-bridge. For context, Goodbye is the final track from the comedy-musical special Inside, done by Bo Burnham. Bo says the special was a long project for him as he filmed the entire thing in his house during COVID-19 Quarantine. The beginning part of this song talks a lot about how Bo doesn’t want the special to be over because now he has nothing else to do, and he’ll just have to live his life. This could translate into c!Ranboo losing a lot of things that he worked for, such as his valuables (totems and riches) and just being a normal person again. It could also signify an ending of a chapter for him, maybe his marriage ending, his partnership with the Syndicate ending. However, I believe that its most likely to be c!Ranboo’s neutrality ending. During the recent lore stream he did with c!Wilbur, we finally saw c!Ranboo pick a side. He chose Wilburger over Las Nevadas, losing his trademark neutral stance. c!Ranboo thought his neutrality made him more than others, that he was the one able to see over the conflict, but now he’s just like everyone else. He has a side and an enemy. Let’s move into the bridge and ending of the song now. The first line I’d like to call specifically is ‘Wanna guess the ending, if it ever does.’ This line could maybe signify the fact that throughout the history of the SMP there have been many times that the conflict and story feel like they’ve finally come to a close, only for everything to start up once again. The next lyric is ‘If I wake up in a house that’s full of smoke, I’ll panic, so call me up and tell me a joke.’ This is a callback to another song on Inside, Comedy, in which Bo talks about using his comedy as a way to help people, but really it was he who needed help. c!Ranboo acts as a protector for a lot of characters, most notable c!Tubbo and tried hard to please most people and aid as many as he can, but most of the time he’s the one needed the most help. Similar to Bo, c!Ranboo doesn’t realize he needs help until it’s too late.

Time Moves Slow (BADBADNOTGOOD and Samuel T. Herring) - This song is about a person who’s lover has left them, and although it’s painful they know its for the better. This could, unfortunately, suggest a c!beeduo split but there is another part of this song that I’d like to touch on. ‘Running away is easy, its the living that’s hard.’ This is the chorus for the song and it talks about how running from your problems is easier than facing them but having to live without them is hard. Throughout the story, we often see c!Ranboo ignore his problems, most recently with the vandalism of c!Tubbo’s cookie shop. c!Ranboo found it and decided to fix it and tell no one it happened, which lead to a hostile confrontation between c!Quackity and c!Tubbo.

#PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF CHRIST REBLOG THIS #THESE TAKE ME AN INSANE AMOUNT OF TIME #dsmp #dreamsmp #dream smp #ranboo #ranboo dsmp #c!ranboo theory #c!ranboo analysis #dsmp analysis #dsmp theory

60 notes · View notes

potteresque-ire · 4 years

Note

Hello. I just turned to be a turtle recently after being a solo fan mostly because of toxic atmosphere of solo fans. May I ask, were relationships between XZ and YB solos always so intense and also bad attitude to BJYX even during the promotion “the untamed”? Or did this conflict start after the events of 2020? Thank you in advance.

Hello, and Happy 2021! I’m a super new fan of the fandom, and so these aren’t questions I’m qualified to answer at all. I’m more comfortable providing some wider sociopolitical contexts to fandom-related events because I’ve been reading about Chinese news for a loooong time. My “investigative interest” (oh dear, that sounds so pretentious) is also more on understanding the CP culture in general, how it ties with the country’s state of affairs rather than focusing specifically on Gg and Dd. While I’ve read back on some history re: gg and dd’s fandoms, Tumblr is the only site where I’ve interacted directly with fellow fans.

But I’ve written up what I’ve understand about solo and CP fans for c-dramas so far, mostly for my own benefit (I have a ridiculously poor memory!). Maybe it can offer some insight? This is very new information to me as well; so, if anyone spots something wrong or wants to supplement, please jump right in!

Wars between the fans of the leads of a CP (“ship” in English; stands for “couple”) aren’t new. Conflicts between solo and CP fans also aren’t new.

Competition is the most obvious cause of wars between the fans of the leads of a CP. Especially in the case of M/M pairings, the person “bound” to each idol by their CP is also, by default, about the most “direct” competitor one can have. They’re likely to be of the same age group, share similar fan demographics. Popularity of young male idols (often called “Little Fresh Meat” 小鮮肉, a nickname I’ve abhorred for the decade or so it’s come to existence) also isn’t expected to last, so the two CP leads must make the most of their newfound fame within the same time frame. The competition is more than fighting for similar roles; in China, another major arena is endorsements, in which an idol’s popularity is by measured by 1) the number they hold and 2) the units they sell. Here in the US, stars choose their endorsements based on how well they fit their image; there, stars take as many as they can as long as the negotiated terms are satisfactory. Hence, dd is the spokesperson of 25 products / services in 2020 (including an insurance company (!!)).

I’ve also read about this norm in the industry, which I have yet to verify: in China, if two stars compete for the endorsement of the same brand product, the one who loses will not get endorsements of same products from different brands — at least, not in the short term — because any brand who uses the star who lost would be seen as inferior. Hence, to lose the competition on one endorsement deal can mean losing the endorsement deals for an entire category of products.

(Someone on Weibo has pointed this out: while Gg and Dd have often endorsed competing brands of the same product: Budweiser (gg) and Yenching beer (dd), for example; they have never fought for the endorsement of same brand product. Again, I haven’t verified this.)

This part is easy to understand.

The next question is: why are solo fans against CP fans? “Girlfriend fans” — solo fans who can’t bear to seeing their idol paired up with anyone other than themselves — only make up a fraction of the fandom. How are CP fans generally perceived?

My key findings so far: CP fans are *perceived* to be more likely to express negative views about their idol paired up with other actors / actresses, which will affect viewership and ratings, restrict the kind of roles their idol will be invited to play. More importantly, CP fans are *perceived* as fickle — more likely to walk away after their favourite CP drama has ended, because as CP lovers, they’re thought to be equally in love with the romantic gestures as with the stars who perform them on/off stage. ie, When another drama comes along featuring the same romantic gestures, the CP fans are expected to jump ship.

I highlight the word “perceive”, because while it doesn’t matter how solo fans see CP fans, it does matter how the business side of c-ent view CP fans and it appears to share this view. The c-YiZhan fandoms have been unhappy with the publicity of the upcoming adapted BL dramas for this reason — aside from their allegations that it’s copying The Untamed’s BTS, the thing that has offended them the most, perhaps, is the very idea that the marketing departments thought a few “leaked” photos of the leads acting intimately close are enough to woo them away from YiZhan, from Gg and Dd.

Given this, perhaps, prevalent view of CP fans, CP fandoms have been viewed as something disposable, almost, to be made, used and discarded quickly.

Before and during the airing of the drama, the marketing / publicity teams fuel and encourage CP fandoms, reap the benefits in viewership from the ensuing discussions and hot searches. Solo fans usually aren’t threatened by CP fandoms in this nascent phase—CP fandoms have been far smaller in size and only grow during the broadcast.

More importantly, the norms have been that CP fandoms do not last.

CP fandoms do have a tendency to “self-combust” over time: fans * within * the fandom accusing each other of being partial to one of the leads — spending more money on A’s endorsements, for example, or buying more copies of B’s music. However, this isn’t how many CP fandoms die. Instead, once the show is over, the process of “Breaking the CP” begins. I’m not sure who gets this process going, but my guess is the leads’ management companies, with consent (willing or unwilling) from the actors. Breaking the CP means having the CP leads avoid each other as soon as the drama is done airing, and for as long as it takes for the CP fandoms to dissipate. It means no more appearing in the same drama and shows; no more sharing a stage; and if they happen to be at the same event, they are to communicate as little as possible. This “loosening the bind” between the leads is designed to free the actors up for the next CPs, and its way of execution can be very abrupt, very … cruel for the CP fans. For one of 2020 summer dramas (Love and Redemption 琉璃), for example, a popular character (het) CP pairing was broken up in the last fan meet, 10 days after the final episode had aired. The fan meet was marketed as a CP event (there was even merch for the CP); CPs fans bought the tickets, perfectly aware of the unsaid “CPs are made to be broken” rule and it’d likely be the last time they’d see their CP together. But the organisers denied them even this last chance; the leads of the CP had no interactions, not even eye contact during the entire event. The actor didn’t acknowledge the actress in his farewell speech. The fans understandably got upset; even outsiders sympathised, stating that the CP-breaking could be handled with a little more consideration. Word on the street was that because the male lead already had other dramas lined up, the CP had to be broken up as quickly as possible.

(Weibo Night from almost a year ago was seen as a “Break the CP” event for Gg and Dd. Some turtles still cry at the memory of it.)

There’s a term related to the breaking of CPs: 提純 (“increasing the purity”). It describes the ultimate goal of breaking CPs: increasing the proportion of solo (”pure”) fans by breaking up the CP and having the solo fandoms of each lead absorb the CP fans. Because solo fans are *perceived* to be more loyal (won’t jump ship the next romantic drama comes along), less likely to draw criticisms (especially if the CP is M/M and/or affect the RL lives of their stars), and have more purchasing power (as CP fans have to divide their resources between the two leads and equally).

How does this affect how solo fans see CP fans? Another way to say the above is: one CP fan is one fan the two solo fandoms fail to capture. One more CP fan is one less solo fan. “CP fan” should be a temporary identity. CP fandoms sequester resources from the solo fandoms until they’re broken up.

This sets the stage for conflicts if the CP fandoms refuse to fade, if the CP fans refuse to turn solo.

The conflict between solo and CP fandoms is, of course, even more heated for real-person CP’s, which can, indeed, pose a significant threat to the leads’ life and career. An easy example of the former is if one of the CP leads are in a RL relationship, and/or if the lead is straight but the CP is queer (this is the case for The Guardian (2018), the first popular adapted BL “dangai” drama). Another major issue with real-person CPs (queer or not) is that the media will make frequent comparisons of the leads’ follow-up career. If the CP “bind” remains, the lead perceived as less popular may be viewed as using the more popular one to sustain their popularity. Fans of the more popular lead do not take that well. The management company of the less popular lead takes that even less well, and its PR team will work even harder to eliminate the CP from public discussion.

Overall, the “breaking the CP” strategy works as intended. As long as the CP leads stop interacting, no more new candies are generated for the CP fandoms, and even the best candies have an expiration date. The CP fans move on, often to other CP pairings—the CP breaking process often leave them hurt and disappointed at the leads—and further propagating the perception that they are fickle souls who prefer candies over actors.

With this background, it doesn’t surprise me that the relationship between the fans of Gg, Dd, and Yizhan has been so intense since the airing of the Untamed… it would actually surprise me (much) more if it isn’t.

First and foremost, if I take away my YiZhan-tinted lens (as much as I can anyway!), the competition between Gg and Dd automatically becomes The Battlefield in c-ent. Gg and Dd are among the most popular idols right now, and there’s a strong urgency in this competition as idol popularity is perceived to have a limited shelf life. Now, 18 months after The Untamed, Gg and Dd are not only vying for survival in the same industry—which may encourage cooperation between the two solo fandoms—they’re vying for the throne.

Things are already extra tense that way. Here’s an analogy I can think of—it’s easier to accept losing a lottery by getting every number wrong than getting a single number wrong, and by one count. It’s harder for solo fans to accept being number 2, when number 1 was a co-star, the other half of their idol’s CP.

Now, into this unresolved tension, throw in a huge curveball known as the YiZhan fandoms. A curveball that isn’t even supposed to exist — CP fandoms are all supposed to fizzle out quickly after the show is over. Instead, the BJYX supertopic on Weibo (by far the biggest of the three Yizhan CPs) had 1.5 million members in January 2020. It now has 2.8 million (January 2021).

(For reference, dd’s supertopic has 5.4 million members and gg’s, 7.7 million.)

These YiZhan fandoms aren’t merely living on their last breath, their stale candies. They’re thriving. Self-combustion hasn’t happened. CP fans of Gg and Dd keep finding fresh candies, keep having new things to rejoice and scream about.

If I put myself in the shoes of a solo fan, what does this continued growth of the YiZhan fandoms mean? It means the “binding” between My Idol and That-Other-Idol-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named, each a contender of the c-ent throne, is strengthening instead of loosening. It means more and more fans of My Idol are exhibiting signs of wavering loyalty, by becoming fans of both My Idol and That-Other-Idol. Fan culture in China is highly organized, requiring strategy, cooperation and obedience when it comes to generating the best numbers for their idol (sells, ratings, viewership etc). Having to rely on the fickle CP fans to generate these numbers means uncertainty and anxiety.

People behave differently when they’re nervous. Some chew on their fingernails. Some attack.

2020, of course, make the solo fandoms even more nervous about each other. Gg, post-227, isn’t a safe person to be “bound to”, and also to have one’s career compared against—given the bad publicity that has circulated around him, given the fact that he has managed to stay on top in spite of it. Dd, meanwhile, has grown in popularity while Gg goes into hiding—while I personally do not, for a moment, believe Dd has anything to do with 227, it is within human nature to ask: if one loses—and in a manner so publicised, so catastrophic that even the Western media reported on it—who has the most to gain? Work culture in almost every industry in China is extremely cut-throat, and securing victory by not-so-clean methods isn’t uncommon with the immense pressure to perform. Fans are bringing in their experiences from RL in how they view their idol’s competition—with suspicion, with defensiveness. With swords sharpened and ready for counterattacks.

The ultimate cherry-on-top when it comes to causing conflicts between Gg’s, Dd’s and YiZhan fandoms is, of course, the fact that YiZhan is no garden-variety, heterosexual, character CP. It’s a M/M real person CP, in a society where homosexuality, while legal, is still considered “non-mainstream values” and explicitly censored from TV; where personal freedoms have overall been tightening and laws can change overnight. It’s one thing if their idol is truly in a queer relationship and chooses to announce it themselves; it’s a whole different story if it’s some fans of another idol who “out” them—who publicise their queerness that, in the eyes of these solo fans, may very well be fictional. 227 has already confirmed that in c-ent, idols pay the price of their fan’s wrongdoings and in this case, all it takes is for the YiZhan fandoms to make a single mistake—to celebrate one candy too loudly, for example (“to dance outside the circle”), and catch the attention of the wrong government official — to not only cost their idols their popularity, but their whole career. To the solo fans, therefore, the mere existence of the YiZhan fandoms pose a huge risk to their idol that should’ve been avoidable in the first place. And when they check out the new candies, what do they see? They see Gg leaving hints suggestive of Dd; they see Dd doing inexplicable things that can be linked to Gg. c-Turtles joke sometimes that solo fans are even better than they are at spotting the connections between Gg and Dd. But while turtles see these connections as evidences of a romantic relationship, what solo fans see is the other idol latching onto their own, whose fame makes it a reasonable act; they see it as the other solo fandom carelessly jeopardizing their own idol’s career for the sake of more noise and popularity.

The solo fandoms end up fighting. They have few reasons NOT to do so without the YiZhan-tinted lens.

That said though, I’m not sure if the wars between Gg’s, Dd’s and YiZhan fandoms are truly getting worse. As I write this, my thought is: perhaps it’s not that the fans are disliking each other more, but rather, more and more people are getting involved, and the stakes, the risks are becoming higher and higher. Gg and Dd both had fans during the filming of The Untamed, but they were a small fraction, quantity wise, to what it is now. Even if, at the time, 100% of Gg and Dd fans hated each other, they still wouldn’t have generated the noise than, say, if 0.01% of Gg’s fans are arguing with 0.01% of Dd’s fans now. The arguments then, however ugly they could be, would’ve stayed off hot searches, and largely within the two fandoms. These days, however, when even Gg shaking a pen can make it into hot search (as he did during the Tencent Awards), every heated exchange is amplified by passer-bys, by antis, by done-for-money re-bloggers. Quarrels snowball exponentially to the number of mouths pitching in; so does the antagonistic sentiments behind the hurtful words purposefully or accidentally spilled. Meanwhile, the c-YiZhan fandoms have reached the size that as much as they’ve tried to keep everything away from the public eye, it’s not really possible anymore. Search BJYX online, and videos after videos pop up for any outsider who wish to get a primer—and there’s no control over that content. Gg and Dd’s commercials hint at it. The Tencent Awards show host cued it. Before, the YiZhan fandoms may still be able to get away with a mistake or two. Now, they can make half a mistake and all the info already floating around will make sure that half a mistake will round to one.

If I were a solo fan, perhaps I’d scream my lung out too. Think of how terrible this all is, if Dd(Gg) is actually Gg(Dd)’s most fierce competition, as his being the other half of the CP is meant to be. Think of all the damages these fantastical speculations can do, if My Idol isn’t queer and tomorrow, the government comes down with a decree that outlaws queerness. Maybe My Idol will be spared if he isn’t at the top. But My Idol is at the top. Everyone will point to him. The hot searches will show his name, make sure the powers-that-be see it. He … his downfall… can be made an example …

Okay, okay, I’ll stop playacting here. Phew. That was scary * pats turtle shell to confirm its presence * :) . But can you see how deep that fear can go, for a fan who really, really loves and is therefore protective of their idol? How this fear, which stems from love, can turn into hate and generally loud, angry yelling across the internet?

#Anonymous #pie answers #pie metas #yizhan #bjyx

315 notes · View notes

thepriceofbeingaroseisloneliness · 3 years

Text

Toshiya "Oboro" release commemorative Twitter "Like project" live stream [DAY 5]

A summary and some notes about today’s live stream with Toshiya

Notes before reading: I wanted to do a small summary and highlights of today’s livestream (ended up being 5 pages lol) It’s a bit messier/raw than other times but I hope you enjoy it :) Fujieda starts greeting everyone watching and announces the beginning of the livestream. Today’s is Toshiya’s turn. Fujieda says it’s the last day of these events that took place during Japan’s Golden week, he asks Toshiya how is he doing and he just laughs. Fujieda asks Toshiya if he knows what are these events about and he says “somehow”, Fujieda explains that as “Oboro” was released on Wednesday, people are sharing their impressions about it in the hashtag #direngreyyabai (it would like direngreyisdashit/ awesome) *Toshiya grins when he hears the hashtag name*. So, Toshiya has to get into that hashtag and click “like” in the comments he likes. Toshiya laughs when Fujieda ends his explanation and he asks Toshiya if its his first time at twitter and he says it is. They are laughing for some seconds and then Fujieda explains the “Heart” icon is the “like” one, Toshiya asks him what happens when he “likes” a tweet, Fujieda resplies that person will receive a notification saying that Toshiya liked their tweet and maybe that person its going to be happy (moved?). Fujieda tells Toshiya to scroll in the tag, and read the tweets he is interested in and if he wants, read the name of the person as that would made them happy. Fujieda says he is going to be checking comments at the Gaalaca site and it seems that Toshiya has a screen in his left side with the Gaalaca site too. Toshiya: It’s hard... Fujieda: Rather than hard, it’s hectic…as I’m watching twitter and the livestream’s comments…it’s pretty hectic but it’s funny… Toshiya jokes with Fujieda and says again it’s hard, because he doesn’t understand it well, Fujieda explains how he has to scroll in the hashtag so the tweets will be appearing. Toshiya asks who did these twitter accounts and Fujieda says the staff. He also explains that it was also the first time for Die but it seems that he got used to twitter in the end.

Fujieda encourages Toshiya to click his first like and thanks everyone for so many comments.

Toshiya: Thank you, but I don’t understand this. Toshiya starts scrolling for a while and Fujieda is reading comments from the livestream all the time, thanking them. Toshiya: Woah, you are really busy…. He stops in the tweet of a baby wrapped in a dir en grey towel. Toshiya: There is a cute child ….*opens the picture* Toshiya keeps scrolling and Fujieda tells him that if he was interested in that tweet, he should like that tweet but Toshiya can’t find the tweet scrolling back.

Toshiya suggests to talk while he is doing the twitter thing and Fujieda asks him about “Oboro”, if there is any particular part of the song we should listen to…. Toshiya says that it’s hard to pick so “everything”. Fujieda: Are you looking at the tweets? Toshiya: I am… Toshiya laughs at some tweet thanking Fujieda and clicks “like” for the first time. He seemed amused by the twitter message when he does it. He keeps scrolling for a while and Fujieda asks him the same about T.D.F.F than about “Oboro”, if there is anything in particular…..Toshiya laughs and says “everything”. Fujieda says there are many people saying T.D.F.F is good. Toshiya: is that so? I’m happy… Fujieda sees Toshiya liking a tweet and asks if he is liking a lot but he says “I liked about two” lol This one has attached a pic of one of his basses Toshiya keeps scrolling up and Fujieda teases him about the “like limit” (Shinya got this function blocked for liking too many tweets at once) but Toshiya laughs like “it’s not gonna happen to me” lol. While we are seeing a close up of Toshiya scrolling, Fujieda says that even though is spring its still cold and Toshiya agrees. They also talk about some music shops being close (because of the state of emergency in some cities in Japan) like Shinjiku and Shibuya Tower records so Fujieda thinks that because of that some people might haven’t listened to the single yet. Fujieda reads a lot of names from the stream in a row and Toshiya laughs. He reads and like a tweet asking him about what he is drinking at that moment and Toshiya says “coffee” and adds he is going to buy alcohol ( he mumbles it so low lol) and Fujieda asks him if he doesn’t have any at home and Toshiya says he drank it recently. Shops seems to be closed and not selling alcohol from certain hour due to the emergency state.

Toshiya asks who came up with the hashtag’s name and Fujieda says “the company”. He explains that “yabai” is often used to refer to Dir and Toshiya laughs hard.

Toshiya: Is that so? Fujieda: If people used it a lot, it will be a trending topic…a trending topic is… Toshiya: Am I that old? (that you think have to explain it to me) Fujieda: *laughs* You understand what it’s a trending topic, right? Toshiya: More or less…

Toshiya gets back to scrolling tweets, he likes a few more but mostly just pass them quickly. Fujieda asks him if he is just looking at them quickly/just passing them and Toshiya says he is doing that. Toshiya asks Fujieda why there are so many cats in the tweets, he replies that it’s pretty common in twitter to post cats. Toshiya is like “why?” Fujieda “because they are cute” and Toshiya is like “Oh, I see”. Toshiya reads a tweet about someone saying Fujieda wears a T-shirt with the name of the band in a different colour in every livestream (these shirts are from the last screening) They talk about the shirts. Toshiya seems a be clueless about what to do and Fujieda asks everyone to write their impressions about oboro. Toshiya: From now one, please just (tweet) your impressions about “Oboro” (laughs) Fujieda says the livestream is going to end soon so he encourages people to make a last effort. Next comment Toshiya likes, its about wanting to hear “Oboro” live soon, Toshiya says he wants to play a live. Fujieda goes back to saying people’s name and thanking them for the comments and Toshiya is just scrolling up. Toshiya likes a comment saying that this person’s friend is about to give birth and when she was listening to “Oboro” , the baby started to move intensely and it seems that the baby started kicking the belly lol. Fujieda: At the PV Kyo is being given birth as well. Toshiya laughs hard. He is back at scrolling and likes a few tweets more, one with a picture of his picks and other wanting that “Sogai” live takes place soon. Fujieda says these are too tough times, as they can’t play lives and even music shops are closed now. Fujieda keeps saying people’s name and Toshiya stops at a comment of someone who did a cover of every part of the song, they both think it’s amazing this person could do every single part. Then, he likes a tweet of someone that tried to do a “arukuma” characters with grapes, Toshiya says it looks scary.

Fujieda keeps explaining more stuff about twitter to Toshiya and he just replies “I want to delete it” lol Then he asked whose idea was this and Fujieda says it was the company’s. Toshiya: So you were just like “let’s do it”….like DT (Dynammite Tommy?/DTS?)…. Fujieda laughs and shakes his head. Toshiya: So when this is over, you are going to delete it (the twitter) Fujieda: We are going to keep using it like for example when the album is going to be released….. Toshiya: Eh? *disappointed* Fujieda laughs.

Toshiya stops at a tweet with a screepcap of the hashtag being trending topic in Kyushuu (south of Japan). Fujieda explains what it means. Toshiya: (It’s trending topic in) Ashura no kuni ( dangerous country) *Ashura no kuni is used to referred to Kyuushuu, it’s seems these name comes from “Hokuto no ken”? Fujieda says they are TT also in Kanto (Japan’s main island) and Osaka and other places. Toshiya likes another tweet saying they want to listen to “Oboro” in a Nagano live, Toshiya mumbles “I wonder when it will be possible” Fujieda: I want to play a live Toshiya:*laughs* Ah so? Fujieda: I want to…. with Toshiya…..*Fujieda laughs cause he realizes why Toshiya is teasing him* Not me…I mean the band… Toshiya says Fujieda could impersonate Shinya’s (Fujieda plays the drums) and Fujieda laughs. Fujieda says they are already TT in Japan. Then explains to Toshiya how the “coins system” works in Gaalaca, like they are similar to Youtube’s super chat just that you can “buy” with these coins Dir’s icons or draws…. Toshiya peeks at the screen he has at his left side to check it. Fujieda thanks everyone for so many comments. They are about the finish the livestream. Toshiya: Everyone, take a bath and go to sleep… Fujieda laughs. Toshiya says something about the comments being “nice” and Fujieda says today they are quite nice. Toshiya: So kind… Fujieda: Not saying other days weren’t nice but today are especially nice…. Toshiya: Everyone is really amazing…

Fujieda: We are about to finish this, is that ok for you, Toshiya? Toshiya: Pretty please….

They are finally ending the live stream and Fujieda thanks everyone for taking part in it. Both of them clap. Fujieda: There are more than 2.400 people watching the livestream, is there something you want to tell them? Toshiya: Thank you so much….Dir en grey yabai desu ( Dir en grey is da shit) Fujieda: Da shit, *laughs* Something about “Oboro”? Toshiya: please listen to it a lot, and if we play a live, please come…..that’s all… Fujieda: Thank you! Fujieda starts talking about the event being finished, thanks the people who watched. Fujieda: That so many people took part and show interested, if you all enjoyed I think it’s good, right? Toshiya: Is that so? *laughs* Fujieda: I think that if there is another chance to do it…. Toshiya: I already don’t like/hate this.... Fujieda laughs surprised. Fujieda: Eh?? Next time please take part....with the other members... Fujieda asks people to keep listening to “Oboro” and even if now the circumstances don’t let them play live, to wait until it’s possible. Fujieda: Thank you everyone for so many tweets, icons.... Toshiya: Yes. Fujieda: Finally, please watch the promotional edit of the pv of “Oboro”; thank you for spending your time with us, Today Toshiya was here! Thank you so much! Byee.... Toshiya and Fujieda wave goodbye. Next....”Oboro” PV promotional edit comes it.

#dir en grey #toshiya #translation #toshiyatranslations

117 notes · View notes

canary3d-obsessed · 4 years

Text

Restless Rewatch: The Untamed Episode 16 part one

(Masterpost of All the Recaps) (Canary’s Pinboard)

Warning: Spoilers for All 50 Episodes

All righty, this one is going to be a laff riot...not. Let's do it.

The first half of this episode is like a beautifully executed standalone tragedy, while also threading together all sorts of themes and paying off all sorts of relationship building that's happened in the previous episodes. My hat is off to the writers, while I also shake a fist at them for making me cry an unreasonable amount.

We’re Sailing on a Strange Boat

The episode starts right off absolutely DESTROYING me with the Yunmeng brothers holding hands, fingers interlaced, in the first of many hand-touching moments that punctuate the episode.

Jiang Cheng has to be pretty far gone to accept this degree of comfort and tenderness. I think, from their positions, he is also holding Yanli's hand out of the camera's view.

Zidian finally lets the trio go, and they immediately turn the boat around and head back to Lotus Pier. Wei Wuxian gets the clever idea to turn the benches into makeshift oars but nobody gets the clever idea to use magic to push the boat like they do literally every other time they are in a boat.

Their emotional need to go back to Lotus Pier is understandable, but they are being disobedient and irresponsible by doing it. Jiang Cheng is the future of the clan, and should not risk his life, particularly after his mother chose to sacrifice herself to protect him and after both of his parents told him to go hide with his sister and personal bodyguard brother.

On the other hand, Jiang Fengmian, as clan leader, probably had a duty to go into hiding himself rather than go home to die romantically, so his authority is questionable at this point. Anyway, this is the Jiang Clan, they get to kind of do what they want, except when that pisses Jiang Cheng off.

Lotus Pier Massacre

Back at Lotus Pier, the Wens are kicking Jiang ass. The fight choreography is pretty good, taking full advantage of walkways, railings, pools, and other features of the environment.

Using the set this way always makes fights feel more kinetic and real, as opposed to simply sparring in an open area.

(more after the cut)

Yu Ziyuan is fighting adequately with a sword, having given her preferred weapon to her son. She's clearly been at it for a while, and is tiring; the Wen soldiers are starting to land more and more sword blows but no critical hits yet.

Wen Zhuliu is kicking ass and possibly melting cores, although we don't see him do it to anybody yet. Later we'll hear from Jiang Cheng that he crushed the cores of his parents, but it's not clear when that happens.

Sixth young master replays Jiang Fengmian's entire archery lesson in his head while he waits, and waits, for Wen Zhuliu to finish strangling a dude the right moment to shoot an arrow at Wen Zhuliu.

Homicidal tart Wang Lingjiao notices him lining up a shot, strolls over, and stabs him in the back while he's still thinking about what Jiang Fengmian said. One could wish that JFM's archery lessons weren't quite so wordy.

Wang Linjao normally doesn't carry a sword because of her low spiritual power, but apparently can use one just fine when she's killing kids.

If you start feeling like this episode is unreasonably painful, just think of it as building up calluses so you can handle Yi City when the time comes.

Jiang Fengmian to the Rescue

Jiang Fengmian shows up very far past the nick of time, although he is not actually useful, so it's questionable whether arriving earlier would have helped. But his wife is glad to see him.

Netflix subtitles say that Jiang Fengmian calls Yu Ziyuan "My Lady!" which sounds courtly and romantic in English. His actual words are "San Niangzi" which hunxi-gullai breaks out here. I might render this as "lady wife!" rather than "my lady" but I don't think English really has a perfect equivalent.

Jiang Fengmian sails across the courtyard, knocking down a few Wen soldiers and becoming a young, slender man in the process.

I mean, come on, that stunt double does not look like a boxy middle-aged man from any angle.

The Dying Bit

The episode splits up the big death scene for dramatic effect but I'm recapping it all together to keep things simple.

Within moments of arriving, Jiang Fengmian gets shanked by Wen Zhuliu like Scatman Crothers in The Shining (or Groundskeeper Willie in The Shinning).

Wen Zhuliu stops a Wen soldier from finishing JFM off, just so that a different Wen soldier can deliver the killing blow from the back, which is kinda harsh. With all this spin-fighting there is probably not an implication of cowardice when someone dies from a stab in the back, but still. Too rude, Wen Zhuliu.

Yu Ziyuan sees Jiang Fengmian fall, and after having a moment of sorrow and despair, she stabs herself in the heart, falls down, crawls to him and interlaces her hand with his. He revives just enough to give her hand a squeeze and say "San Niangzi" one last time before dying.

She dies next, with a smile on her face at the end. The soundtrack plays that amazing "horribly emotional death scene" music that isn't one of the tracks available on the OST, argh. This same music appears at the end of Xue Yang's story.

Of the many things I love about the Untamed, the complexity of all the minor characters is possibly my favorite. These two people suck at parenting, and suck at being married, and ultimately suck at protecting and leading their clan, making stupid, selfish choices at every step of the building conflict.

And then they have this incredibly romantic death scene, in which they both face the inevitability of failure, and find comfort in failing together. Yet their death scene is totally in keeping with who we know them to be, and who they are to each other; the drama doesn't cheat by making them ideal lovers or great people at the end. But they have a great, great moment.

Jiang Yanli, waiting in the woods while her brothers are presumably running toward Lotus Pier, drops her lotus pendant, which is made of the loudest jade ever discovered, and it breaks with a crash.

Yanli, who is a well educated young lady, knows a moment of doomy symbolism when she sees it.

Jiang Yanli: Who put a giant rock out here in the woods? What are the odds I’d drop my pendant directly on it?

It’s all Over Except for the Crying, Running and Choking

The brothers climb up on the roof and are shocked to see nothing but Wen soldiers and piled up Jiang corpses...

...including one child who is either about to become a zombie or who is being played by a young actor who can't control their curiosity, judging by the way this eye is sneakily opened while the camera is running.

There's a moment where Jiang Cheng is saying they must have spared his parents, they must be okay, where Wei Wuxian's face is just...wow. You can see right here the gulf in life experience between these two.

Wen Zhuliu roams around looking troubled while searching for more people to kill. He’s an interesting villain; someone who believes his loyalty to his boss makes him a good guy, but knows his boss is a bad guy.

Then we are treated to a hell of a camera move, where it tracks over Yu Ziyuan and Jiang Fengmian together on the floor, heroic in death and still holding hands, and then sweeps up to show their killers sitting on the lotus throne.

The dead couple were at odds for their whole lives together, while the evil people who killed them are acting like devoted lovebirds. It's a stunning shot and a terrific thematic contrast. When Wei Wuxian eventually comes to take his vengeance, he will spend some time turning Wen Chao and Wang Lingjiao against each other, before ending them.

The camera shows us JC's reaction, then shows his mother, then WWX’s reaction, then JF; each reacting to the death of the person who loved them. Some folks may feel that Jiang Fengmian actually did love Jiang Cheng but was just bad at showing it. But Jiang Cheng doesn't think so, and I don't think it's a given that parents love their children.

Side note: Macroexpression king Wang Zhuocheng is able to open his eyes so far that a giant strip of white shows above his irises, and keep them like that, which is quite a trick. Try it yourself.

Meanwhile Wang Lingjiao and Wen Chao gossip about YZY and JFM's bad marriage. Wen Chao admires YZY's beauty, and Wang Lingjiao insults her character, and announces that she's going to stab YZY's body a few extra times. Jiang Cheng briefly faints at this, taking a page from Wei Wuxian's book, and rolls off the roof.

Run Run Away

Both young men run, and run, and run away from Lotus Pier while Wen Chao and Wang Lingjiao mistreat the bodies of Jiang Fengmian and Yu Ziyuan

The stabbing happens off camera, because it's ok to stab a live child on camera, but not a dead adult. (As always, there are cultural reasons for "what's ok" in any country, and I'm not saying anybody's wrong about these choices).

Wen Chao follows this up with pouring a cup of wine across their faces. He does this in the style of a libation for the dead, but as a desecration, combining mistreatment of bodies with profaning a ceremonial rite. In a world where ghosts are real and have sharp fingernails, this is deeply, deeply stupid.

Yu Ziyuan’s actress Zhang Jingtong is able to have liquid poured INTO HER EAR without flinching. Mad props.

The brothers eventually finish running and arrive in a field with an extreme purple photo filter on it. Which I've done my best to remove for these gifs, with variable results.

Jiang Cheng wants to turn around and go back to Lotus Pier. He says he wants to retrieve his parents’ bodies and to take revenge, but he's devastated and it seems likely he just wants to die with everyone else.

Wei Wuxian pleads with Jiang Cheng to calm down and stay safe, while Jiang Cheng gives himself over to anger and shock as the brothers shout at each other.

Punching and running ensues, and Wei Wuxian tries to hold his brother back, grabbing him around the shoulders him in a gesture that painfully echoes the many hugs he's given over the years.

This time Jiang Cheng doesn't just push him off. He turns around and chokes his brother for nearly a full minute, while screaming at him and blaming him.

Just as when Madame Yu beat him, Wei Wuxian doesn't fight back; he pulls on Jiang Cheng's wrists but doesn't hit him or try to break his hold.

Finally Jiang Cheng lets him go, and cries out for everyone he's lost, while Wei Wuxian weeps silently next to him. Eventually they fall asleep in the grass together, their bodies curled up in the form of a heart.

Damn, this episode really brings it.

Side Note: during their argument, Wei Wuxian says, among other things, that "revenge is a dish best served cold," according to subtitles. It's a French saying from the 1800s so it's probably not precisely what Wei Wuxian is saying. More importantly, as a longtime Star Trek fan I can't help but hear James Kirk yelling "KHAN!!!!!" whenever I encounter that phrase.

There’s Got To Be A Morning After

When they wake up in the morning, Jiang Cheng is still in his feelings, but now his feelings have moved along to despair, from anger.

I feel bad for noticing how handsome they both look in this scene. Let's all feel bad about this together.

Jiang Cheng is free to have this level of emotional breakdown because Wei Wuxian is there keeping his own shit together and focusing on what matters.

When Jiang Cheng refuses to get up, Wei Wuxian reminds him, very, very gently, that they have a sister, who has waited all night to know what happened.

At this, Jiang Cheng gets up, but won't look at Wei Wuxian, continuing to blame him for everybody else's actions, as he walks onward to find Yanli.

Wei Wuxian follows, hurt and bereft, as he gets to work internalizing everything that he's being accused of. This is good practice for his future as a widely reviled bogeyman.

Part two will be slightly less awful! Coming soon!

#fytheuntamed #the untamed #the untamed gifs #the untamed meta #wei wuxian #jiang cheng #restless rewatch the untamed #canary3d-original #my gifs #yu ziyuan #wen zhuliu #jiang fengmian

346 notes · View notes

lvlyhao · 4 years

Text

『127′s ideal type』

headcanons, NCT 127

A/N: je suis back~ in these headcanons i talk about the type of person i imagine each member with, along with some of the traits i think they wouldn’t be too fond of. i did NOT include physical traits (ex: “would like a short/tall/blonde s/o”) because i really don’t know them??? lmao also that kind of thing could be a bit damaging to someone’s self esteem, and i want yall to know ur perfect & beautiful so

mark and hyuck will be included in dream’s version of this, and sicheng will be in wayv’s :)

today’s gif theme is just random gifs i like bc idc, there’s no aesthetic

as always, this is gender-neutral

IF YOU LIKE MY WORK PLEASE REBLOG IT AS WELL AS LIKING IT T^T

𝓖𝓮𝓷𝓻𝓮𝓼: fluff (♡) and if you squint really hard angst (❆) bc of some REALLY small things that for me are not actual angst but oh well

𝓦𝓪𝓻𝓷𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓼: i think none?? if you read this and find something you think should be here let me know please!!!

word count: 1.5K

pairing: nct 127 members x reader (includes taeil, taeyong, johnny, yuta, doyoung, jaehyun, jungwoo)

disclaimer: the characters in the story below do not reflect real people or present real facts. this is purely fictional, and you may not copy, change, translate or repost my work in any way. all rights reserved © cherry-hyejin 2021.

*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:

Taeil

I see Taeil getting with someone who’s not only mature (personality-wise, actual age doesn’t matter) but also very determined and decisive. He’d like a person that doesn’t change their mind about things too often, learns well from their mistakes and is just all-around balanced. Other traits that I think he’d look for: politeness, a MUST; grounded; good at giving advice. Pretty much a twin-flame of his.

I think he’d find it cute if they think in a detail-oriented way and appreciate the small things in life. A positive, grateful mentality would be SO attractive to him, I swear.

One of his deal breakers would most likely be excessive jealousy and possessiveness. He trusts you and your love for him, and I think he’d feel distraught if you were constantly questioning the relationships he has with other people (friends, co-workers, fans, etc.)

Last important thing: needs a person that can take a hit. He’s probably looking for someone he can spend the rest of his days with, so a quitter just isn’t good for that. There will be difficult moments in the future and he needs to know they won’t give up on him and on the life he chose.

Taeyong

I think Taeyong would like a calm person that knows how to take control of the relationship. He probably feels tired sometimes from leading a group of 23 people, so I can imagine he’d be thrilled if he was able to not worry at all when he’s around his partner. He trusts they’re capable of dealing with any problems that may arise and keep their feet on the ground. Bonus points if they have a good relationship with themselves.

By that I mean: you know how people say you can’t truly love others until you love yourself? Yeah, that. He’s a person like any other, and there are times when he struggles with self-love, but he needs someone that doesn’t hate themselves, or he’ll simply go crazy. With his career come so many rumours and moments that tear at his confidence… he just doesn’t need a person that has to be convinced every single day that they’re worthy of the good things in life.

I’d say, in general, all he asks for is someone that can watch out for themselves. He’d take care of them too, but he’d like it SO much if just for once in his life he’s the one being cared for. Would just melt on the spot if you have that caring, almost parental instinct in you. Gods, yes. That’s all I can say.

Johnny

I can see him being with a very bright, smart person. He’d like someone that comes from a different background so he could learn more about their life—whether that means the country they were born in or their field of work. I think he would appreciate a very laid back person that doesn’t get stressed too often and won’t make fun of him for his bad jokes. Also, doesn’t like people that try to play him. Honesty above all.

He’d like it if they are super curious and creative, too. Picking up new hobbies and interests is something he’d be up to anytime, and it doesn’t matter what it is either. He’d give anything a try—from knitting to marine biology, no questions asked.

Something he’d dislike is if the person is too materialistic. It’s not like he’s a completely spiritual being and lives with 0 detachments to objects but he’s a firm believer in what Antoine de Saint-Exupéry said: what is essential is invisible to the eye. And, you know, what you truly find essential is up to you; it can mean family, friends, love, hope, all of that… he just wants you to love life itself as much as he does.

Yuta

He’d probably like one of the two drastic variants: a very gentle, sweet person or someone who’s on his level of flirtatiousness and boldness. Wouldn’t mind any, but he needs a strong personality, either way, you know? No blandness here.

Something very attractive to him is being involved in social issues and caring for the world around you. Very sexc, yes, and also likes people that make others smile.

Something that would make him quite literally give up on someone is the excessive fear of change, or just the will to remain in their comfort zone at all costs. He earns for a person that wants to live life to its fullest. If not they’re not ride-or-die to that level, then he hopes they at least accompany and support him in all of the things he wants to do.

One thing that is very tied to that is his dislike for know-it-alls. He lives in such a diverse scenario that it’s just dumb for him to think someone would ever be capable of knowing every piece of information on everything that’s out there. He’s fine with people making mistakes, but if they can’t admit to that or admit they don’t know something he just gets pissed off. So, yeah, he’d avoid stuck-ups.

Doyoung

He’d like someone very loyal and fair, who treats people with respect but calls them out if they ever have to. I think he’d prefer a person that is naturally a deep thinker and wouldn’t lose their mind over small disagreements.

Much like Johnny, he likes that intellectual side of yours, and when I say that I don’t mean like “ah, he’d want to date a math genius” or something. No, no. I’m referring to all types of intellectuality and intelligence. The thing for him is simply using your brain and being proud of it. He would just dislike a person that kind of lives life on autopilot, you know?

He’d like it if they’re interested or professionally involved with music somehow and would consider their opinions in his career. He wouldn’t mind if their taste is hugely different from his, though. It’s alright if pop music is not your favourite or if you have no idea who EXO is (lol). All he wants is to see the world through your eyes too, in all aspects of life including this one.

Will also love you forever if you side with him when he’s being teased by the others, because, c’mon, it’s always 22 people against poor, defenceless Doyoung. Please don’t join them, he’s begging you—

Jaehyun

This is very, very clear to me but he needs to be with an independent person. He’s quite sentimental and he has his more romantic moments, sure, but he wants someone that can give him the space he needs when he needs it. A person that’s constantly begging him for attention would be way more of a burden than anything else.

Also, he’s 100% alright with someone that has a very explicit and loud love language (like saying “I love you” 300 times a day) but he’s not like that, and he needs them to see that. Jaehyun could NOT be with a person that doesn’t appreciate the love he shows in the little things, like making coffee in the morning, and if they ever question the way he feels… yeah, not good. He’d feel misunderstood and that’s a big no-no.

He’d find it cute if they’re bubbly or just very youthful but is also capable of falling for an old soul that shares his interests in things like classical music and vinyls. I don’t think he’d ever get with someone that's kind of a tech addict, though, idk why but that’s quite clear to me. Always being on your phone or caring too much about social media would probably make him feel like you’re not grateful for the things you have around you, in real life. So, yeah, not attractive, bestie.

Jungwoo

Jungwoo is a very, very, very sweet person and he needs someone who’s also like that. He wouldn’t care if that’s there for everyone to see, in the sense that they’re not shy about it, or if it’s a part of them that only a couple of close people know. As long as it’s there, he’s happy.

Aside from that, I think he’s fully capable of falling in love with quite literally anyone. He can see the beauty in all types of people, from all places, backgrounds, races, and just—anyone. He’s just so full of love for people, ah I can’t even. He’s too good for this world.

Some things that could, however, push him away from getting to know someone: a negative way of thinking, being too traditionalistic, and too much scepticism. He’s fine with people that like to honour the past and their roots but like, you’ve gotta keep up with the world you live in and accept that things change. I think that’s very tied to how much he likes defying masculine standards, too.

The scepticism thing is quite simple: he can handle teasing just fine but if they’re constantly making fun of him for wearing his heart on his sleeve or being a bit goofy, he’d feel kind of betrayed.

---

final notes: this is the 3rd nct work i’m posting here and i’m already writing more, so i think it’s time i set up a masterlist, a fic rec blog and a tag list. if you want to be tagged in my future fics, let me know (dm, comments, anything) :)

140 notes · View notes

anambermusicbox · 3 years

Text

September 29 Day Countdown (26/29): 2016-2018 Radio Interviews on 动感101《小畅翻牌》

2016/12/20

(2:00) Interviewer, knowing Ukraine has renowned music schools, thought Zhou Shen went to Ukraine specifically to study music before she found out he actually was in dentistry and then switched to music; she asks why he went to Ukraine to study.

Zhou Shen: Simple! Because it’s cheap. (T/N: it’s extremely extremely cheap compared to studying abroad in other countries, and Zhou Shen’s family was quite poor)

(3:00) How did you win your parents over?

ZS: I didn’t. I told them, “Hey, I don’t think I can do this” and they were like “What?” I said, “I really can’t do this.” At first, they didn’t really understand what I was going through at the time. They said, even if I had to retake a year or two, they wanted me to keep going. They said, then take some time to improve in the language. I said, “I really can’t do this anymore,” they said no, and later I went against their wishes and applied to the music conservatory anyways.

(7:30) ZS talks about how he didn’t talk to his parents for months after switching schools, until finally his parents told him, “Then in the future, whatever you do is no longer our concern” and then hung up on him.

ZS: (8:10) They said, okay we’re not giving you money for school, you figure it out yourself. But parents are like this: they say things but don’t go through with it. So they gave me money for tuition but nothing to cover living expenses. (*laughs*) (Interviewer: They said, whether you eat or not is no longer our concern) Yup. (*laughs*) They said they’d give me money for living expenses only if I studied medicine or language. So I had to borrow money from a classmate for food. I held out for 2 months, starved for 2 months before they said, okay since you’re this persistent, even though we’re still against this- (Interviewer: They still don’t want their son to starve to death) Right, they didn’t want to lose a kid. (*laughs*)

Interviewer: (9:00) When did their attitude finally soften towards your decision?

ZS: After the Voice. (T/N: ZS didn’t tell his parents before he competed on the show; they found out along with the rest of the public when it aired) [...] They thought, ah okay he’ll be able to take care of himself now, he knows what he’s doing.

Interviewer: (9:50) Are they proud of you?

ZS: Oh yeah, they’re absolutely embarrassing. (*laughs*) After the episode aired, my parents- they run a small business, and customers who came by, my parents would be like, “Look :) who this is :)” and the customer would be like “…??…uuhh who is-“ “ITS HUAN YAN, OUR SON SANG IT!!!” (*laughs*) and then the customer is like “uuhhh ehhrmm….” I wanted to die from the embarrassment oh my gOD, it was so awkward. So awkward. Afterwards, I started avoiding being with them when they were with people. (*laughs*) They- they’re parents; they were happy, and then they started to worry. (*laughs*) This career... how long would I be able to do it for...

(11:50) ZS talks about how surprised he was by how popular Big Fish was; after only a few days, a lot of covers started appearing online. The singers for Big Fish and Begonia’s other OSTs were very big names, Eason Chan and Lala Hsu.

ZS: At first, they planned to have another very big name singer to sing Big Fish (T/N: it was supposed to be Faye Wong!), but because of reasons, their plan never came to fruition. The song’s lyricist, Yin Yue, she’s really too good to me. She kept insisting to the director, “Zhou Shen can sing this song, you should let him try,” but the director honestly didn’t care. The production company and the director, they wanted someone had enough influence to promote the film. (Interviewer: But congratulations to them, they ended up choosing the right person for the song! :D)

(19:30) ZS: “[After Masked Singer], my parents, they posted a WeChat moment they was quite touching—they said “Our son sang so well and seeing him work so hard—we want him to continue singing.” (Interviewer: Oh so they go online often?”) Yeah, only because I spent years teaching them.” (*laughs*)

(19:45) ZS: “Every time I come home, my parents play my songs non-stop. I asked them, aren’t you sick of listening to it? Later I asked my sister, and she told me they play my songs all the time everyday. I felt like, wah (Interviewer: “All these years of being a host, and my own parents are the most avid viewers of my program.”) Wow… auntie uncle, I’m very sorry… (T/N: LKJNASFDFA THIS MADE ME SPIT OUT MY FOOD I WAS EATING HAHAHA) they’re gonna hate me. [...] I think, being a parent is really such hard work.”

2016/12/17

(5:30) ZS talks about how he didn’t sing at all during in his middle school years. Interviewer asks whether he ever tried to conceal his being different from everyone else.

ZS: Actually, when you listen to me talk, I- all these years I’ve already gotten accustomed to making my voice lower, it’s a force of habit. I’ve forgotten what my regular voice is supposed to be like. If I relaxed my throat while speaking it would sound like this—thinner, higher. But now I can’t go back.

(7:50) Interviewer asks whether he’ll try out different styles of music:

ZS: I think right now, people don’t know me well yet. I want people to first know who Zhou Shen is, what kind of songs he sings, and then try other genres, and only then will people want to listen. If release a song, people will be like, who’s Zhou Shen and won’t try listening to it—and if they listen and it’s a genre I’m not good at? Wow, no one’s going to listen.

2018/02/03

(1:50) ZS: “Well for one thing, I really hate my voice. (Interviewer: Why?) A male with this kind of voice is really weird. (Interviewer: It’s unique! It’s memorable. Can you find other people with this kind of voice?) Yup. My dad. (*laughs*) One time, my manager called my dad and he- “Hello?” “Oh hello auntie-” I was like “wAIT WAIT WAIT that’s my dad” (*laughs*) (Interviewer: Can he sing too?) No way, he scares people to death when he sings, he can’t sing. (*laughs*)

(7:45) After Big Fish was released:

ZS: Everyone seemed to like it, it felt- Eh? This is great. After about two weeks though, comments started to appear like: “just found out a man sang this and I feel like vomiting, I deleted this song immediately.” And it wasn’t just this one, there were many comments like it. It was extremely upsetting. I felt like, one of those characters in a sad drama, the kind that gets abandoned and they’re crying like “what did I do to you to make you treat me like this? TT^TT”

Interviewer: It’s like, even if there’s a whole pile of positive comments, if there’s one negative, that’s the one you pay attention to. Even if there are 100 nice comments—

ZS: —if there’s one hurtful comment, that’s the one that sticks with you, exactly! Everyone has this tendency.

(7:20) ZS talks about his duet with Guo Qin again (see translation from another interview talking about it here), how he was just as nervous as he was in his own blind audition and how he would’ve blamed himself if she had lost: “She’s 17—super young, makes me so mad—and she was sitting so calmly; meanwhile, I was standing there, all my limbs trembling—like, who’s supposed to be helping who here?” (*laughs*)

(14:45) About how he’s grateful that he didn’t get popular overnight:

ZS: If I got popular overnight, I think it would’ve been over for me. Because my singing really did need improvement. Also, I think my album is really important in that in helped me get through a bottleneck period. At that time, I felt like, no matter how I sang it didn’t sound good. I felt like, can I even sing? But the process of recording this album helped me to see where I needed to improve.

So if I got popular overnight, it really would’ve been over for me, because my singing wouldn’t have improved. It would’ve stopped there. (Interviewer: And you would still believe that you’re really good.) Everyone around you is praising you like (*rapid clapping*) “You sing so well!! You sing so well!! Look at how everyone wants to hire you to sing, you sing super well!!” It’s over- it would really be over. […] I quite like progressing one step at a time.

(18:10) Zhou Shen talks about how, when he got eliminated on the Voice, he wasn’t crying because he lost, but because suddenly going from spending so much time together as a team and having such camaraderie to all but four eliminated was too heartbreaking.

ZS: (20:20) When I got eliminated, I was actually really happy. I don’t like competing, and I felt I didn’t have any pressure on me anymore. I felt bad for Li Wei because I knew there would definitely be a lot more pressure on him now, because now he has to represent our entire team in the future competition.

After our PK, he—because we both cried so hard—he said (*shrill crying voice*) “Zhou Shen I’ll carry your name and compete to the end!! TT^TT” (*Interviewer laughs*) and I replied, (*shrill crying voice*) “You shouldn’t give yourself so much pressure, don’t carry my name just sing TT^TT” (*laughs*)

You don’t understand how hard we were crying. After the PK, there had to be a 25-minute intermission because Na-jie had to cry too. So she’s there crying in the mentor area and I’m crying in the eliminated area and Li Wei’s crying in the advancement area. [...] During the blind auditions, every single person earned their place in the team one by one, and now all of them are being taken out one by one—it was quite brutal.

2018/02/10

(1:30) Zhou Shen talks about how he has a longer process to be accepted compared to other singers, because they first have to get over the fact that a man has this type of voice before they truly listen to him sing. Some people react like, WOW amazing!! while others are on the other end of the spectrum:

ZS: Once, I was at a restaurant and at that time, they were broadcasting the blind auditions of the Voice. The restaurant owner just happened to be watching it, and when I appeared, he was like “Eh? Who’s this- WAH-“ and immediately changed the channel. I was like ??? D’: ????? “…can I have some water?” (*laughs*) He changed the channel right in front of me, you know? He didn’t recognize me. It was- (*makes disgruntled noises*) It was really upsetting.

(2:20) ZS, about being on Masked Singer: “That was the first time I felt acknowledged by the sentence ‘wow this girl sings so well!’”

(20:30) In the three years since your debut, have you ever seen a fan who, because of your songs or your voice, their life changed?

ZS: Have I seen that personally? That would be impossible, but I have read about it in letters and comments. There was one comment, this person—they had depression, the kind that they were being prescribed medication for—but they started listening to my music and slowly started to become happier, their mental health improved. I was so astonished—music is really so powerful.

Another one was- to be honest, men with this type of voice are actually not uncommon. It’s really not just me. Once, I was at karaoke with an old schoolmate—middle school or high school, I forget—and he said, “because of you, Zhou Shen, because you sang in that competition [the Voice], I’m now brave enough to sing at karaoke. It feels like, even with this kind of voice, I can sing too.” That moment—I was so moved.

2018/05/19

(3:45) ZS talks about how Gao Xiaosong was really satisfied with how the album turned out, and how Gao Xiaosong is actually really thin.

Interviewer: Why do you always have to mention that? No one is asking about whether he’s fat or thin.

ZS, joking: How else do you think I got this album—I kept complimenting him as thin (T/N: HAHAHAHAHA)

#zhou shen #周深 #my translations #zs 29 #mine #puts this in the queue at 4 am 2 hours before the scheduled time.......#so much for fixing my sleep schedule OTL #so tired... i'll check for typos later asdfaADFAS #im just *chucks this at u*#this is why im only translating highlights LMAO #this interviewer is actually a host with shenshen as a guest on her show but im just using the same terminology to be consistent LOL #its definitely an interview anyways #check notes later for bilibili link!#edit: OKAY TYPOES SHOULD BE FIXED NOW HAHAHA THANKS EVERYONE

20 notes · View notes