#also that's Frisian on the note

[soopsiedaisies]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Thank you sm for tagging me @lovelymasks and @strugglequill <3

How many works do you have on AO3?

16, though one is still hidden for fest.

What's your total AO3 word count?

140,294. Counting my, ahem, other/abandoned account, it's about 520k. Counting my drafts I think we've reached about a million.

What fandoms do you write for?

A Court of Thorns and Roses, Batman, and Harry Potter. I've got some WIPs for Bridgerton and Teen Wolf in my drafts as well though.

Top 5 fics by kudos?

an eye for an eye, a leg for a leg. A Batfam fic in which the Joker gets got.

drawn together. Another Batfam fic lmao, with Damian & Bruce being good at art.

yet, never, in extremity, it asked a crumb of me. Sirius & entourage saving little 5yo Harry from the Dursleys.

i watched as your life just fell apart. Charlus & Dorea Potter adopt Harry after Halloween and ensure Sirius gets a trial (with the help of Orion Black)

boy, you've been a naughty girl. Feysand Court of Nightmares smut.

Do you respond to comments?

I try to!! Sometimes I get a notification but I don't have the spoons to write out a deserving reply, but then I forget and then the next time I get a comment... it's been months and I'm too embarrassed to reply after such an enormously long wait. I also have a tendency to not reply to comments under the last chapter of multichaps until I've posted the new chapter.

What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

grim-old-place, I think, even though it isn't really angsty. I enjoy writing happy endings and hopeful open endings far more. Big fan of fix-its, personally. But yeah, grim-old-place is probably the one with the angstiest ending (despite being only a drabble) because it's just so. Hopeless, I suppose?

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

an eye for an eye, hands down. Hopeful and happy, which is not something you'd expect for a angry&angsty revenge fic full of grief.

Do you get hate on fics?

I don't. Not yet, at least (I'm sure it'll happen though? It's part of posting your stuff online for the world to see). Very thankful I've not gotten any hate yet.

Once I got 'hate' on my attitude towards JKR (in which I think she's awful), but that was not on the fic itself, more on my author's notes.

Do you write smut?

Yes. It's very awkward for me. I'm not a very sexual person lol.

Do you write crossovers?

I haven't! No inspo for a good crossover yet either. I'm more an AU person (Bridgerton Prongsfoot, anyone?)

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

No! [knocks on wood]

Have you ever had a fic translated?

I've only ever been asked (I think by a bot lmao), but no, no translations (to my knowledge)

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I've tried and it ended in chaos <3 The other author and I are still friends, but our schedules just didn't align at all.

What's your all-time favourite ship?

Superbat! Prongsfoot is a close-second. (The ship I've shipped the longest is Zukka I believe)

What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you will?

I've got this time-travel Tomarry fic in my drafts that I want to completely write before posting, but idk if that'll happen lmao. There's a changed backstory to Harry that needs to be taken into account and it's just... a lot.

What are your writing strengths?

I'm very descriptive and (apparently) good at setting a vibe! It's always nice to hear that because those are, generally, my favourite bits in reading actual novels.

What are your writing weaknesses?

Sentence-structure variety, use of the passive voice, putting too much detail or far too little because I want to get to the fun bit, creating a well-rounded plot... many.

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language?

I've considered it before for another WIP, but... I do think it'll take a reader out of the immersiveness of a fic. I'm also not fluent in any other language than English, Dutch, and Frisian, which may mean I'll royally fuck up any sentences I write in, say, French. There's this skin that allows you to show the translation when you hover though which is cool!! If you're confident in the other language, that might be something nice to look into haha

First fandom you wrote for?

Harry Potter (unpublished) or Hetalia. I think I've still got a USB stick with some ancient files on there lying around.

Favourite fic you've ever written?

oh, my dear girl. It was really fun to write female Harry in a good relationship with her aunt and cousin, and I've got some really fun bits in the upcoming sequels/chapters (undecided how I'll do that still) as well.

(There's another WIP (still unposted) that I just really love, in which Harry's consciousness travels to an alternate dimension and he ends up in the body of Henry 'Harry' Potter, James' twin brother (who is younger than James by twenty minutes). Henry's consciousness is still there and they just work together, which results in a lot of chaos (with James). )

I also adore nightcourt.gov because it's just humour and silliness which you just need sometimes.

No pressure tagging (I'm so sorry if you've already been tagged or have done this!) : @v-a-l, @plecotusauritus, @the-lonelybarricade, @separatist-apologist, @velidewrites, and anyone who'd like to do this :))

[vinlandmapper]

Republic of the New Netherlands (Chronoscape Nexus)

Anthem: "Het Lied van Vrijheid" (The Song of Freedom)

Capital: Vrijland

Largest city: Nieuw Amsterdam

Official language (s): Dutch, English, French

Other languages: Indigenous languages (e.g. Mi'kmaq, Cree, Abenaki, Mohawk, and others), Swedish, Frisian, German, Vinlandic, Norwegian, Icelandic, Italian, Javanese, Basque.

Religion: Irreligious and Calvinist majority, with small minorities of Islam, Asatru, and Catholicism.

Demonyms: Akadien | Akie (informal)

Government: Parliamentary republic

President: Mattheus Litjens

Prime Minister: Justin Trudeau

Legislature

Upper House: Senate of New Netherlands (Senat van Nieuw-Nederland)

Name: House of Representatives (Huis van Afgevaardigden)

Independence from the Dutch Republic:

Treaty of Njimegen: 12 November 1678 Signed between the Dutch Empire and France, this treaty recognizes the territories of New Netherlands (including annexed parts of Quebec) as a distinct entity with semi-autonomous governance.

Constitution of New Netherlands: 1 January 1776 New Netherlands adopts its first constitution, establishing a parliamentary system and defining the structure of government and civil rights.

Act of Sovereignty: 6 May 1814 This act formally declares New Netherlands as a fully independent nation, separating it from any remaining ties with the Dutch Empire and affirming its status as a sovereign state.

Area: 295,900 sq mi (766,700 sq km).

Population: 51,510,237 (2024 est.)

GDP: $2.6 trillion ($50,464 per capita)

Gini coefficient: 0.675

HDI: 0.935

Time zone:

Eastern Time Zone (ET)

Standard Time: UTC-5

Daylight Saving Time (DST): UTC-4

Currency: New Netherlands Mark (NNM, 1 USD = 1.35 NNM)

Driving side: Right

Calling code: +1

ISO-3166 code: NWN

Internet TLD: .nn

THE (ALTERNATE) HISTORY

Note: This isn't meant to be realistic

In 1609 CE, Dutch explorer Henry Hudson, employed by the Dutch East India Company (VOC), ventured into the northern reaches of North America. Hudson's exploration, initially intended for the search of a northeast passage to Asia, led him to the vast, fertile lands of what would become New Netherlands. Despite his voyage being cut short by political conflicts, Hudson's reports detailed a land ripe for settlement, with expansive river systems and rich resources.

The Dutch Republic, recognizing the potential of this newfound land, decided to establish a foothold. By the early 1620s, Dutch settlers began arriving in the region. They named their colony New Netherlands, establishing key settlements along the waterways, including New Amsterdam (modern-day New York City) and New Utrecht.

The Dutch presence in North America would see significant expansion due to their successful colonization efforts. New Netherlands rapidly grew as a thriving commercial hub, leveraging its strategic location for trade and exploration. By the late 17th century, the Dutch influence extended over much of the northeastern region of North America, including parts of modern-day Canada.

In September 1655, Dutch soldiers from New Netherland, under Peter Stuyvesant conquered New Sweden, and also occupied Sweden's other colony of Vinland, both of which were given autonomy later on.

However, the success of New Netherlands was challenged by European rivalries. During the Franco-Dutch War (1672-1678), the Dutch Republic found itself engaged in a fierce struggle against France and its allies. The war saw intense battles and shifting alliances, but the Dutch emerged victorious. As a result of the Treaty of Nijmegen in 1678, the Dutch secured a significant territorial concession from the French, which included parts of what is now Quebec and the surrounding region.

This acquisition, known as Laurentia, bolstered the Dutch claims and solidified their influence in North America. The area was integrated into New Netherlands, creating a new and diverse cultural mosaic within the colony.

The success of New Netherlands continued well into the 18th century, although tensions remained with other European powers and the indigenous populations. The colony maintained a delicate balance between expansion and diplomacy, forging treaties with local tribes to secure peace and trade routes.

As the 19th century approached, New Netherlands faced internal and external pressures. The rise of the American Revolutionary War (1775-1783) saw New Netherlands navigating complex alliances, balancing its interests with those of the British, Italians, and newly formed United States.

Despite these challenges, New Netherlands thrived and continued to develop its identity. In 1821, the colony officially declared its independence from the Dutch Republic, adopting a republican form of government and establishing the Republic of New Netherlands. This new nation maintained a strong economic and cultural connection to its Dutch heritage while also embracing its unique North American identity.

The Republic of New Netherlands continued to grow throughout the 19th and 20th centuries, navigating industrialization, world wars, and changing geopolitical landscapes. By the mid-20th century, New Netherlands had established itself as a prominent player on the international stage, known for its rich cultural heritage and significant contributions to global trade and diplomacy.

Today, New Netherlands stands as a proud and prosperous nation, celebrating its diverse history and vibrant multicultural society. Its capital, New Amsterdam, reflects the country's deep roots in both Dutch and North American cultures, symbolizing the enduring legacy of its exploration and expansion.

Additional information:

Name- New Netherlands is an anglicism of the Dutch 'Nieuw Nederland' derived from the same colony in the same area of modern day New York City.

Division - New Netherlands is a federative state made up of provinces and autonomous regions

Feasibility - Why I included Acadia and Laurentia is because of the historical Franco-Dutch Wars. The Dutch had claims going up to the St. Lawrence River IRL, but they never settled the area and if the Dutch won the Franco-Dutch Wars they could've annexed their claims.

Culture: Predominantly Dutch but varies across regions. For example Quebec/Laurentia has French-style cuisine and Vinland and New Sweden are Scandinavian, while New Jersey has an English-derived culture like that of the neighboring United States or the further afield New Albion.

Majority of people would affiliate with Calvinism, but for how religious the general Calvinist population is I'm not sure.

Another difference is that, football, as in soccer would be the most popular sport compared to OTL were this territory is divided between Canada and the US and plays American football.

They'd still be separatists like OTL Canada

Obviously New York remains New Amsterdam

As for pop culture and media:

Any media from the OTL region and about the region would be very different.

As for the US, the US doesn't rise to a global superpower here and some of the iconic and famous eastern seaboard cities like Boston and New York wouldn't exist the same way they did in OTL. they could still boast large populations however. They'd also have different names reflecting the different colonial environment.

What do you think of this? Feel free to express your ideas

[harvest-moonie]

cheese part 2 The word cheese comes from Latin caseus, from which the modern word casein is also derived. The earliest source is from the proto-Indo-European root *kwat-, which means "to ferment, become sour". That gave rise to cīese or cēse (in Old English) and chese (in Middle English). Similar words are shared by other West Germanic languages—West Frisian tsiis, Dutch kaas, German Käse, Old High German chāsi—all from the reconstructed West-Germanic form *kāsī, which in turn is an early borrowing from Latin.

The Online Etymological Dictionary states that "cheese" comes from:[6]

Old English cyse (West Saxon), cese (Anglian) ... from West Germanic *kasjus (source also of Old Saxon kasi, Old High German chasi, German Käse, Middle Dutch case, Dutch kaas), from Latin caseus [for] "cheese" (source of Italian cacio, Spanish queso, Irish caise, Welsh caws).

The Online Etymological Dictionary states that the word is of:[6]

unknown origin; perhaps from a PIE root *kwat- "to ferment, become sour" (source also of Prakrit chasi "buttermilk;" Old Church Slavonic kvasu "leaven; fermented drink," kyselu "sour," -kyseti "to turn sour;" Czech kysati "to turn sour, rot;" Sanskrit kvathati "boils, seethes;" Gothic hwaþjan "foam"). Also compare fromage. Old Norse ostr, Danish ost, Swedish ost are related to Latin ius "broth, sauce, juice."

When the Romans began to make hard cheeses for their legionaries' supplies, a new word started to be used: formaticum, from caseus formatus, or "molded cheese" (as in "formed", not "moldy"). It is from this word that the French fromage, standard Italian formaggio, Catalan formatge, Breton fourmaj, and Occitan fromatge (or formatge) are derived. Of the Romance languages, Spanish, Portuguese, Romanian, Tuscan and Southern Italian dialects use words derived from caseus (queso, queijo, caș and caso for example). The word cheese itself is occasionally employed in a sense that means "molded" or "formed". Head cheese uses the word in this sense. The term "cheese" is also used as a noun, verb and adjective in a number of figurative expressions (e.g., "the big cheese", "to be cheesed off" and "cheesy lyrics")

Ancient Greece and Rome

Cheese in a market in Italy

Ancient Greek mythology credited Aristaeus with the discovery of cheese. Homer's Odyssey (8th century BCE) describes the Cyclops making and storing sheep's and goats' milk cheese (translation by Samuel Butler):

We soon reached his cave, but he was out shepherding, so we went inside and took stock of all that we could see. His cheese-racks were loaded with cheeses, and he had more lambs and kids than his pens could hold... When he had so done he sat down and milked his ewes and goats, all in due course, and then let each of them have her own young. He curdled half the milk and set it aside in wicker strainers.[14]

Columella's De Re Rustica (c. 65 CE) details a cheesemaking process involving rennet coagulation, pressing of the curd, salting, and aging. According to Pliny the Elder, it had become a sophisticated enterprise by the time the Roman Empire came into being.[15] Pliny the Elder also mentions in his writings Caseus Helveticus, a hard Sbrinz-like cheese produced by the Helvetii.[16][17] Cheese was an everyday food and cheesemaking a mature art in the Roman empire.[18] Pliny's Natural History (77  CE) devotes a chapter (XI, 97) to describing the diversity of cheeses enjoyed by Romans of the early Empire. He stated that the best cheeses came from the villages near Nîmes, but did not keep long and had to be eaten fresh. Cheeses of the Alps and Apennines were as remarkable for their variety then as now. A Ligurian cheese was noted for being made mostly from sheep's milk, and some cheeses produced nearby were stated to weigh as much as a thousand pounds each. Goats' milk cheese was a recent taste in Rome, improved over the "medicinal taste" of Gaul's similar cheeses by smoking. Of cheeses from overseas, Pliny preferred those of Bithynia in Asia Minor.

Post-Roman Europe

Cheese, Tacuinum sanitatis Casanatensis (14th century)

As Romanized populations encountered unfamiliar newly settled neighbors, bringing their own cheese-making traditions, their own flocks and their own unrelated words for cheese, cheeses in Europe diversified further, with various locales developing their own distinctive traditions and products. As long-distance trade collapsed, only travelers would encounter unfamiliar cheeses: Charlemagne's first encounter with a white cheese that had an edible rind forms one of the constructed anecdotes of Notker's Life of the Emperor.

The British Cheese Board claims that Britain has approximately 700 distinct local cheeses;[19] France and Italy have perhaps 400 each (a French proverb holds there is a different French cheese for every day of the year, and Charles de Gaulle once asked "how can you govern a country in which there are 246 kinds of cheese?").[20] Still, the advancement of the cheese art in Europe was slow during the centuries after Rome's fall. Many cheeses popular today were first recorded in the late Middle Ages or after—cheeses like Cheddar around 1500, Parmesan in 1597, Gouda in 1697, and Camembert in 1791.[21]

In 1546, The Proverbs of John Heywood claimed "the moon is made of a green cheese" (Greene may refer here not to the color, as many now think, but to being new or unaged).[22] Variations on this sentiment were long repeated and NASA exploited this myth for an April Fools' Day spoof announcement in 2006.[23]

Modern era

Cheese display in grocery store, Cambridge, Massachusetts, United States

Until its modern spread along with European culture, cheese was nearly unheard of in east Asian cultures and in the pre-Columbian Americas and had only limited use in sub-Mediterranean Africa, mainly being widespread and popular only in Europe, the Middle East, the Indian subcontinent, and areas influenced by those cultures. But with the spread, first of European imperialism, and later of Euro-American culture and food, cheese has gradually become known and increasingly popular worldwide.

The first factory for the industrial production of cheese opened in Switzerland in 1815, but large-scale production first found real success in the United States. Credit usually goes to Jesse Williams, a dairy farmer from Rome, New York, who in 1851 started making cheese in an assembly-line fashion using the milk from neighboring farms; this made cheddar cheese one of the first US industrial foods.[24] Within decades, hundreds of such commercial dairy associations existed.[25]

The 1860s saw the beginnings of mass-produced rennet, and by the turn of the century scientists were producing pure microbial cultures. Before then, bacteria in cheesemaking had come from the environment or from recycling an earlier batch's whey; the pure cultures meant a more standardized cheese could be produced.[26]

Factory-made cheese overtook traditional cheesemaking in the World War II era, and factories have been the source of most cheese in America and Europe ever since.[27] By 2012, cheese was one of the most shoplifted items from supermarkets worldwide.[28]

[tinyshe]

  Tenebrae                                                                                                                  plural in form but singular or plural in construction  : a church service observed during the final part of Holy Week commemorating the sufferings and death of Christ.                          

Word History;  Etymology                                                                                              borrowed from Medieval Latin, "office sung during Holy Week during which candles are extinguished after each psalm," going back to Latin tenebrae (plural) "darkness, obscurity," by dissimilation from *temebrai, going back to Indo-European *temH-s-ro-/*temH-es-ro- (whence also Sanskrit támisrāḥ, plural, "darkness, night," Germanic *þemestra- "dark"—whence Middle Dutch deemster "dark," Old High German dinstar, finstar), adjective derivative from a noun *temH-es- "darkness"  — more at temerity            

                Note:    Also most likely related are Old English þēostre, þīestre "dark, gloomy," Old Frisian thiustere, Old Saxon thiustri, assuming that *-ems-, through shift of m to a nasalized semi-vowel and denasalization, became a diphthong *-iu̯-. Old High German finstar (whence Modern German finster) and Middle Dutch vinster probably go back to a shift of *þim- to *fim- (the initial fricative taking on the labial quality of the following m), with later assimilation of m to n before following -st-.        

text source  

[ask-thenetherlands]

-a bottle with a note in it has appeared to Andrias, the note reads- I borrowed your tools : ) - Jaitze

Groningen: “...I’ll be back.”

[inevitably-johnlocked]

Hello Steph 😊 Do you have any BAMF Molly or just some good fics that feature Molly? I need some Molly love at the moment because I just read a fic where she "turns to the drak side" so to speak, and my heart 😭😭😭

Hey Nonny!

Ah I did a few comm. recs lists recently with Molly, but here are what I can offer you from memory, LOL. PLEASE add your fave Molly fics, guys! PLEASE NOTE these are fics I’ve read, and please check the sub-headings for a TONNE of stuff I haven’t read!! Big title so I can find it later LOL.

MOLLY PLAYS A ROLE

See also:

COMM RECS: Coming Out To Molly

COMM RECS: Molly with Women

COMM RECS: Molly and Greg Push John and Sherlock Together

COMM RECS: Molly as a Villain

Santa Knows by Itsallfine (T, 1,719 w., 1 Ch. || Christmas Party, Love Confessions, First Kiss, Fluff, Matchmaking, POV Sherlock, Pining Sherlock) – Sherlock and John both get exactly what they want from the Yard's secret Santa exchange. Pure holiday fluff.

What John Doesn't Know (Won't Hurt Him) by blueink3 (NR [T], 4,392 w., 1 Ch, || S3 Fix It, Pining Sherlock, Snippets of Life, Hurt/Comfort, Scars, Fluff and Angst, Five and One, Hopeful Ending, POV Sherlock) – Five people who see Sherlock's scars before John Watson. But Sherlock's secrets were never something he could keep from his blogger for long.

Thirty Three Hours Without John Watson by Bookaholic, mybrotherharry (M, 6,232 w. || First Kiss / Time, Pining Idiots, BG Mystrade, Crackish) – Sherlock can SO TOTALLY survive without John Watson. It should be a piece of cake. AKA the time when Sherlock braved grocery store lines for milk, purchased and gave away a box of tampons and figured out what the X-Factor is. Greg and Mycroft didn’t sign up for this shit. Next time, they are going to the Bahamas.

Wonderful, Etcetera. by VictoryCandescence (T, 16,955 w., 3 Ch. || Wonderful Life AU || Alternate Timelines, Brotherhood, Homophobia, Suicidal Ideations, Mentions of Drug Use, Friendship, Different TRF, Sherlock’s Past, Victor Trevor is Past Boyfriend, Depression, Hallucination, Love Confessions, Christmas, First Kiss) – Sherlock thinks everyone would be better off if he had never existed, including and especially himself. When he finds himself in a world in which his wish has been granted, he begins to think perhaps even he could be wrong – but it takes an unlikely chaperone to make him not only observe, but understand.

Insanity in the Middle by DotyTakeThisDown (E, 28,010 w., 8 Ch. || Equestrian Sports AU || Alternate First Meeting, POV John, Pining John, Bottomlock, Clueless Sherlock, First Kiss/Time, Passionate Kisses, Hand Holding, Caught Making Out, Bed Sharing, Spooning, Blow Job) – John is a world-class eventing rider with a gold medal and several four-star wins to his credit, but he's never won at Rolex. Sherlock is an up-and-coming rider taking the sport by storm.

Love or What You Will by miss_frankenstein (T, 31,987 w., 11 Ch. || College/Uni AU || Professor John, Ph.D Student Sherlock, Pining John, Poetry, Falling in Love / Slow Burn, Light Angst, Happy Ending) – John is an English professor who specializes in War and Post-War Literature and Sherlock is the brilliant yet impossible Ph.D. student assigned to be his TA because no one in the Chemistry Department is willing to put up with him. And - somewhere between Waugh and Plath, e-mails and takeaway, novels and villanelles - they fall in love.

The Wrong Wagon by DancingGrimm (E, 35,663 w., 20 Ch. || Alternating POV, Molly/  John [Molly pines for John], Public Sex, Casual Sex, Obliviousness, BAMF!John, Awkwardness, Angst & Humour, First Time, Virgin Sherlock, Jealous Sherlock) – Molly sees John in a new light and realises that she may have hitched her horse to the wrong wagon...or something like that. John pines for Sherlock and worries what he will think if he ever finds out. And Sherlock doesn't know what Molly's up to...but he knows he doesn't like it.

The Pieces That Fall to Earth by Itsallfine (M, 49,513 w., 84 Ch. || S4 Fix-It, Epistolary, Love Confessions, Slow Burn, Parentlock, Past Abuse, Coming Out, Internalized Homophobia, Questioning Sexuality, Mental Health Issues / Therapy, Angst, Happy Ending) – John and Sherlock have hit rock bottom, but with all their armor stripped away, they can finally speak honestly, seek healing, and find the truths that matter most. An epistolary post-s4 fix-it fic. Now complete. (This fic is rated T except for one very clearly marked and easily skippable chapter, which is rated M.) Part 1 of The Pieces that Fall to Earth

floating through a dark blue sky by Lediona (M, 58,966 w., 15 Ch. || Notting Hill AU || POV John, Celebrity Sherlock, First Date / Time / Kiss, Past Drug Addiction, Angst with a Happy Ending) – Of course, I’d seen his films and always thought he was, well, brilliant -- but, you know, a million miles from the world I live in. Or, when John is the owner of a travel book shop and the famous Sherlock Holmes stops in one day.

This Thing All Things Devours by cypress_tree (E, 63,844 w., 15 Ch. || In Time AU || Science Fiction, Dystopian Universe, First Meetings, Action / Adventure, Romance) – In 2169, time is money—literally. Humans are genetically engineered to stop aging at 25, when the numbers on their arm start counting down from one year. When that time is up, they die. The only way to get more time is to earn it, borrow it, or steal it.John Watson lives day-to-day in the crowded slums of Zone 13. He never imagined living any differently—until he meets the practically-immortal Sherlock, and helps him on a case to track a local time-thief...

Northwest Passage by Kryptaria (E, 95,157 w., 27 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Canadian AU ||  BAMF!John, Canadian John, PTSD, Anal / Oral Sex, Rimming, Emotional Hurt / Comfort, Drug Rehab, Falling in Love, Pining Sherlock, Love Confessions, Sherlock’s Violin, Panic Attacks, Switching, Anxious / Protective Sherlock, Hugs for Comfort, Suicide Mentions, Healing Each Other) – Seven years ago, Captain John Watson of the Canadian Forces Medical Service withdrew from society, seeking a simple, isolated life in the distant northern wilderness of Canada. Though he survives from one day to the next, he doesn't truly live until someone from his dark past calls in a favor and turns his world upside-down with the introduction of Sherlock Holmes." Part 1 of Tales from the Northwest

The Stars Move Still by BeautifulFiction (E, 96,022 w., 5 Ch. || Magical Realism, Demons, Slash to Pre-Slash, AU, Happy Ending, Souls) – "What could I want so desperately that would make me sell my soul? What could possibly compel me to surrender the part of myself that makes me who I am: the source of my magic, my self-control, everything?”

Definitions by siennna (T, 101,528 w., 12 of ? Ch. || Dev. Rel., Pining, Fluff and Romance, First Kiss, Love Confessions, Fluff, Cuddles, Girl’s Night, Texting, Virgin Sherlock, Drunk Sherlock, Background Mollstrade, Hair Petting, Laying on Lap) – Sherlock’s journey in defining his flat mate and stumbling through the muddled world of emotion. {{This feels complete; the chapter count is listed as ? but I feel like it is done}}

between each beat are words unsaid by darcylindbergh, hudders-and-hiddles (T, 107,998 w., 215 Ch. || Epistolary, Slow Burn, Friends to Lovers, Angst, Happy Ending) – On their wedding night, John and Sherlock gift each other with the things they each said when the other could not hear, the things they each put down where the other could not see: a collection of writings that illustrate the way their love for one another has grown over the years. Part 1 of between each beat

The Burning Heart by May_Shepard (M, 119,150 w., 21 Ch. || Canon Divergence, Post-TRF, John’s Sexuality, S3 Rewrite, Pining, Angst with a Happy Ending, POV John Watson, John’s Gay) – When Sherlock dies, John Watson feels like his life is over too. He’s completely shut down, until Mark Morstan, a new nurse at John’s medical clinic, catches his attention, and helps him uncover the long buried truth of his attraction to men. Although he’s certain he’ll never get over Sherlock, John plans to move on, and build a new life with Mark, unaware that Sherlock is not quite as dead as he appears, and that Mark is hiding secrets of his own.

A Further Sea by i_ship_an_armada & ShinySherlock (E, 125,492 w., 23 Ch. || Historical Pirates AU || Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Doctor John / Pirate Captain Sherlock, Sailing, UST / RST, Masturbation, Action / Adventure, Mild Angst & Peril, Romance, Shaving, Molly/Janine, Bottomlock, Hand / Blow Jobs, Past Drug Use, Slow Burn, Mild Violence, Facial Shaving, Happy Ending) – Here be a tale of adventure for both body and soul, but beware if ye be not of stout heart, for this be piratelock, ya savvy? Luckless ship's surgeon John Watson takes a chance, and finds himself eye to eye with The Ghost, the scourge of the seven seas and a definite thorn in the side of the blaggard, James Moriarty. But when John finds there's more to this most cunning pirate than be meetin' the eye, he has to choose... is it a pirate's life for him?

The Horse and his Doctor by khorazir (T, 129,003 w., 13 Ch. || Horse / Vet AU || Magical Realism, Horses, Vet John, Horse Sherlock, Implied Alcoholism) – Invalided after a run in with a poacher in Siberia, veterinary surgeon John Watson finds it difficult to acclimatise to the mundanity of London life. Things change when a friend invites him along to a local animal shelter and he meets their latest acquisition, a trouble-making Frisian with the strangest eyes and even stranger quirks John has ever encountered in a horse.

Performance In a Leading Role by Mad_Lori (E, 156,714 w., 21 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Hollywood / Actor AU, Secret Relationship, Falling in Love, Slow Burn, Romance, Coming Out, Fluff and Angst, Pining) – Sherlock Holmes is an Oscar winner in the midst of a career slump. John Watson is an Everyman actor trapped in the rom-com ghetto. When they are cast as a gay couple in a new independent drama, will they surprise each other? Will their on-screen romance make its way into the real world? Part 1 of Performance in a Leading Role

Mise en Place by azriona (M, 161,004 w., 28 Ch. || Restaurant (Kitchen Nightmares) AU || Sherlock is Gordon Ramsay / Celebrity Sherlock, Restauranteur John, Harry Plays Prominent Role, Alternating POV, Mutual Pining, Cranky Sherlock, Bed Sharing, Slow Burn) – John Watson had no intentions of taking over the family business, but when he returns from Afghanistan, battered and bruised, and discovers that his sister Harry has run their restaurant into the ground, he doesn't have much choice. There's only one thing that can save the Empire from closing for good – the celebrity star of the BBC series Restaurant Reconstructed, Chef Sherlock Holmes. Part 1 of Mise en Place

[mrnd93]

When you get this you have to answer with 5 things you like about yourself, publicly. Then, send this ask to 10 of your favorite followers (non-negotiable, positivity is cool)

So - I’m a bit late to the party, because WORK. Thanks for the lovely ask tho! 😘 And because the wonderful @vulgar-display-of-escapism sent me the same ask, I’ll do my very best to name 5 different things for your and her ask!

- my loyalty. Once you have it (it takes a while, be warned 😂), it’s near impossible to lose it.

- the fact that, if I’m devoted to it, I can learn the basics of a new language within two weeks (that is, reading and writing and basics like “my name is…” “i’m from …”, “how are you” and “I’d like…”.).

- I’m fluent in Dutch, English and Frisian. I’ll do fairly okay in French, Spanish and German conversations. I know the basics of Russian, Modern Standard Arabic and a little Greek. Also - I’m proud to say I can read the Cyrillic, Arabic and Greek script.

- following the previous, I’m a fast learner in multiple areas (as long as it’s not physics or chemistry 😂)

- to end on a “simple” note, I’m pretty tall (1m80) and I love my looooong legs (they look even longer with the right jeans and heels 😍)

[usafphantom2]

Dutch F-35 now operational with the activation of the first squadron

Fernando Valduga By Fernando Valduga 12/27/2021 - 08:17 in Military

The Royal Dutch Air Force (RNLAF) declared the initial operational capacity (IOC) of its fifth-generation F-35 fighter aircraft, joining a select group of 8 countries with such capacity.

The IOC statement means that the country's air force can now deploy a four F-35 squadron with personnel and equipment anywhere in the world for a short time.

RNLAF reached the milestone after receiving its first F-35 at the end of 2019. A total of at least 46 of the new fighters will replace the F-16 fighters currently in service.

The F-16 has been in use since 1979 and has been deployed for many operations in more than 40 years. Although the F-16 fighter has undergone many updates over the years, it remains operational but technically outdated. The Dutch also determined that the F-16 was also no longer financially sustainable, as it is becoming increasingly expensive to maintain older aircraft.

To reach the IOC, the F-35 squadron moved from Leeuwarden to Volkel Air Base last year for exercise Frisian Lightning II. The goal was to prepare the unit for a change in the shortest possible time. Frisian Lightning Exercise previously trained the packages and the preparation of equipment and spare parts. The Air Force also performed a similar maneuver from Leeuwarden Air Base to the United States this year.

“With this, we are taking another important step in our transition to a future-proof air force. I hope that on our way to full operational capacity, we will enter a period of strong deployment of this wonderful new weapons system. Just as we have seen the almost continuous deployment of F-16s in the last 30 years, more is only possible with this 'next level' fighter," said Lieutenant General Dennis Luyt, commander of the Royal Dutch Air Force, when declaring the IOC on December 27.

Australia, England, Italy, Norway and the United States, among others, preceded the Netherlands in conquering the IOC mark with their F-35 fighters.

When it selected the F-35 in 2013, the Dutch government ensured considerable involvement of the Dutch commercial sector in the program. This resulted in collaborations between Fokker and Lockheed Martin for cabling and housing for the braking parachute system, and Fokker with Northrop Grumman for hatches. Dutch Aeronamic is working with Honeywell for parts of the power supply systems, while Thales is cooperating with Northrop Grumman on radar systems.

The Ministry of Defense noted that a new facility for the maintenance of the F-35 engine was inaugurated in Woensdrecht less than two months ago. The installation will not only maintain the engines of the Dutch F-35s, but also those operated by international partners of the program.

Tags: Military AviationF-35 Lightning IIRNLAF - Royal Netherlands Air Force / Royal Dutch Air Force

Fernando Valduga

Cavok Brazil - Digital Tchê Web Creation

[dear-indies]

Hi! So I wanna play Kate Kane, but I am having a hard time finding a fc that is either Jewish or lesbian or both. Do you know of any? I would prefer ones that are both or at least a queer female fc and jewish. I know it's a hard one and if you don't know, please don't worry. Have a great day!

Jenna Wolfe (1974) Ashkenazi Jewish - lesbian.

Sara Gilbert (1975) Ashkenazi Jewish - lesbian.

Samantha Ronson (1977) Ashkenazi Jewish - lesbian.

Mya Byrne (1978) Jewish - lesbian and trans. 

Rona Kenan (1979) Ashkenazi Jewish - lesbian.

Sue Bird (1980) Ashkenazi Jewish - lesbian.

Abigail Savage (1984) Jewish - lesbian.

Michelle Chamuel (1986) Egyptian Jewish - lesbian.

Hannah Hart (1986) Ashkenazi Jewish / English, possibly other - lesbian.

Nikki Blonsky (1988) Ashkenazi Jewish - lesbian - please note that there's conflicting sources about a 2008 altercation so use at your own discretion.

MK Nobilette (1993) Jewish - lesbian.

Diane Flacks (?) Jewish - lesbian.

Non-binary suggestions!

Joey Soloway (1965) Jewish - non-binary, gender non-conforming and a lesbian - they/them.

Carly Usdin (1982) Ashkenazi Jewish - lesbian, queer and non-binary - they/them.

Cyrus Grace Dunham (1992) Ashkenazi Jewish / English, with distant Irish, remote Scottish, Welsh, and German - has said that he's "transmasculine and non-binary and also maybe forever lesbian" - he/him.

King Princess (1998) Ashkenazi Jewish (one quarter), Dutch [including Frisian], Polish, English, one eighth Irish, one eighth Italian, as well as distant Cornish, French, Scottish, and Welsh - genderqueer and is a lesbian.

Not lesbian suggestions but from Twitter responses discussing the non-Jewish casting of Batwoman people also suggested queer Jewish actresses that didn’t identify as lesbian so I hope these are ok to suggest and if not please let me know otherwise! 

Carrie Brownstein (1974) Jewish - bisexual.

Vanessa Carlton (1980) Ashkenazi Jewish / Norwegian, Swedish - bisexual.

Kate Siegel (1982) Ashkenazi Jewish - bisexual.

Abbi Jacobson (1984) Ashkenazi Jewish - bisexual.

Olivia Thirlby (1986) Ashkenazi Jewish / possibly English - bisexual.

Ezra Furman (1986) Ashkenazi Jewish - trans and bisexual - she/they.

Monica Raymund (1986) Dominican Republic / English, Ashkenazi Jewish - bisexual.

Mara Wilson (1987) Ashkenazi Jewish / Irish, English - bisexual.

Ilana Glazer (1987) Ashkenazi Jewish - queer.

Evan Rachel Wood (1987) English, Irish, Scottish, German - Jewish - bisexual.

Beanie Feldstein (1993)  Ashkenazi Jewish - is openly dating a woman but doesn’t want to label her sexuality.

Jessie Paege (1999) Jewish - bisexual.

Jazz Jennings (2000) Sephardic Jewish - trans - pansexual.

Emma Seligman (?) Jewish - bisexual - she/they.

Here you go! 

[jackhkeynes]

11m Lexembr

kevlar /keˈvlar/ [kɪˈvlɑː] robbery, burglary, theft, the act of acquiring property illegally; heist, an instance of robbery, especially from an institution such as a bank, museum or other secure stronghold; (by extension) scheme, plot, a complex plan to conduct a likely-illegal activity; (archaic cant or modern humorous, non-finite forms only) to rob, burgle, thieve, to undertake a heist

Also romanç kevlar | heist story, tale in which a heist is central to the plot, especially considered as a subgenre of masquira novels and films

Etymology: disputed. The noun first definite attestation in writing is in the 1793 work An Enumeration of Thieves' Cant (originally in Boral as Enombr a Vanagl Saccacer), describing the slang of the Damvath underworld. Originally referring to any robbery, the narrower sense has been strengthened by its association to fiction; the twentieth century saw kevlar borrowed into many languages to refer to the genre of stories—see English kevler romance, for example.

Possible antedatings to Pentrose/Axbane slang have led some to conjecture a connection to a Welsh *cafelat "act of obtaining", although the phonetic implausibility (the Welsh would have penultimate stress) and the utter lack of outside evidence for this derivative of verb cafel "to get, be given" tally against it. Furthermore, if the intriguing reference to vol quȝralle "quiral (?) theft" in a fourteenth-century record of Jeluðrou court proceedings is an ancestor, the period (before substantial Welsh immigration to the cities of southern Borland) and the location (a minor northern town) rule this theory out definitively.

Unfortunately, the other options are just as easily discarded. Backslang—the practice of generating slang by saying words backwards—from a Germanic cognate of "robbing" (most often suggested is Frisian raovig, but even this is tenuous) is a popular but ultimately unworkable theory. Saxon cüble "luggage, baggage" or the derivation cübler "footman, male servant, especially one tasked with carrying possessions around" also do not quite harmonise with the timeline and the semantics.

Loy paregl ny cour es ajoutað de bon romanç kevlar. /lɔj paˈrijl ni kur ɛz ˌa.ʒuˈtaθ de bɔn roˈmants keˈvlar/ [lɔj pɐˈʀi.jʊ ni ˈkʊː‿ʀɪz ˌa.ʒʊˈtah dɪ ˈbɔn ʀʊˈmans kɪˈvlɑː] place same in=def heart be.3s gratify-ptcp.pst from good story heist The same part of the heart delights in a good heist story.

---

paragraphs excerpted in translation from the Borland vicine mesh [1] distributed library page for masquira romance, as it stood in February 2021 N. Much of it is lifted from books out of withholding, such as fi Javeria's Literary Developments of the Nineteenth Century and Mulcrive's Epics by Steeplepost: the Birth of Masquira in British Mendeva.

…familiar with the quintessentially Albick folk tales of the farmer duke and his masked band.

Although these earlier examples illustrate the timelessness of some of masquira's central tropes (most vitally the eponyous masks!), we do not see the emergence of a distinct genre until the nineteenth century, with the publication in 1860 Portugal of Ezio Carvallo's trevold Tejan de Masquira ou Jalico (released in Boral as Cuscon Reðr Cognit [2], translated by Anscon Polgat). It was Carvallo's works—this first book being only the first in a dozen-strong series—which introduced many of the essential properties of a masquira tale, and first presented them together as a coherent whole.

For example, Jalico almost singlehandedly creates the conceit of the kevler [heist] in which our protagonist must obtain a valuable item by means of a complicated scheme involving trickery and deception; note that the word itself would not be applied to the trope for some time, as it is of Borlish origin. Often an item of jewellery, masquira is often said to run parallel to the older Cathayan tradition of tapsue (magpie) tales. We can also connect the two traditions by their adoption by tovarick…

---

[1] A portion of the global mesh [Internet], usually qualified with a geographical term. [2] And for example in Kentish as We Arive in Unwemmed [immaculate] Clothes.

[germanicseidr]

Proto-Germanic

The Proto-Germanic language is the ancestor of all Germanic languages, including those who have gone extinct by now and those that still exist, including the one I am currently using to write this post. The Proto-Germanic language is a descendant of the Proto-Indo European language and was spoken in north-western Europe, countries like Denmark, southern Sweden, Southern Norway, northern Germany and the northern Netherlands.

The language is entirely reconstructed which means that there is very little physical archeological evidence of this language. The language was reconstructed with the help of Grimm's law, developed by Jacob Grimm (the same Grimm who published those fairy tales). Grimm's law is a set of statements describing the consonant changes in the Germanic languages all the way back to the Proto-Indo-European language. With this statement it is possible to pick a modern day Germanic word and derive this word back to an older version from a previous language.

Here are a few examples: Modern day word: English - foot, Frisian - foet, German - Fuß, Swedish - fod Proto-Germanic root: fot Proto-Indo-European: consonant f changes back into p, Pods.

Modern day word: English - what, Dutch/Frisian - wat, German - was, Danis - hvad, Norwegian - hva Proto-Germanic root: hwat Proto-Indo-European: consonant hw changes back into k, kwod.

Modern day word: English - goose, Dutch/German - gans, Frisian - goes, Danish/Norwegian/Swedish - gås Proto-Germanic root: gans Proto-Indo European: ghens

Note that it is very important that the word you want to apply grimm's law to, is actually Germanic in origin. You can know this by checking if the word is similar in other modern day Germanic languages. It is per example more difficult to use English for Proto-Germanic studies than German, Dutch, Frisian or Danish because the English language contains a lot of loan words from the French language. Of course there are many more rules than just these consonant changes in order to reconstruct the Proto-Germanic language. I am however quite bad at explaining grammar rules in English because English is not my native language.

The Proto-Germanic language was most likely spoken by the Germanic people around 500BC but developed into three distinct branches around 200-150BC. These three branches are: West-Germanic, East-Germanic and North Germanic.

West-Germanic: The West-Germanic language developed into several different languages which were and are spoken in modern day the Netherlands, Belgium, Great Britain and parts of western Germany. The West-Germanic language itself divided into three branches as well: North sea Germanic, which includes languages like old Frisian, old English and old Saxon which in turn evolved into the modern day languages of Frisian, English and low German/plat Duits.

Then you have the Weser-Rhine Germanic branch which is the ancestor of the low Franconian, Rhine Franconian and the old high German languages. These languages developed into the modern day languages of Dutch, Afrikaans and German. The last West-Germanic branch is the Elbe Germanic which is the ancestor of the upper German, Central German dialects and the extinct Langobardic language.

East-Germanic: Sadly all of the East-Germanic languages are extinct right now but they consisted of languages like: Gothic, Vandalic, Burgundian. The last Gothic language, Crimean Gothic, went extinct in the 18th century in Crimea. Even though these languages are now extinct, several texts have been found in these languages which makes reconstructing them a bit easier. Still it is quite a shame that we have lost these languages.

North-Germanic: The North-Germanic language evolved into the Scandinavian languages in two branches, West-Scandinavian and East-Scandinavian. West-Scandinavian includes languages like: West old Norse, Norse, Icelandic, Faroese, Norn. The East-Scandinavian branch includes languages like: East old Norse, Swedish, Danish, Gutnish and all of its dialects.

The Proto-Germanic language is also the language of the original runes, the elder futhark. Each name of the runes is in fact a Proto-Germanic name. You can observe this well if you use another Germanic language like German, Dutch or Frisian and compare them with the elder futhark names. (It doesn't work that well in English thanks to all its loan words). Per example the first rune Fehu is still similar to the modern day Dutch - Vee, German - Vieh and Frisian - Fee while the modern day English word cattle is a loan word from the old French word chatel.

At the beginning of this post I mentioned that there is very little physical evidence for the Proto-Germanic language, that is because of course the ancient Germanic people didn't write anything down. Yet it is still a miracle that there are tiny traces left like the Vimose inscriptions from around 200AD, the word harja spelled out in the elder futhark on a comb per example. The Negau inscription on a helmet and the transcription of several words used by Tacitus in his work Germania.

I hope this post has given you a bit more information on what language the ancient Germanic people spoke and how it developed into the languages we still speak until this very day. I suggest you go and try to study the language that interests you the most. I know most asatrus have their heart set on old Norse but remember that old Norse is just a branch of the Germanic languages, it is by no means the heart of the Germanic religion nor is it the language of the earliest runes. I myself find it interesting to study and write in the Proto-Germanic language.

Here are pictures of: The Germanic languages tree (Yes this is not the complete tree because that image is too big for a facebook post.) Vimose inscription on a comb, 160AD found in Denmark. The Negau inscription (note that the helmet dates back to 450BC and was created by the Celts, the inscription however was added later around 200-150BC, it reads harikastiteiip. The names of the elder futhark. A Proto-Germanic poem that I have written myself.

[vivi-the-sky-kid]

An Analysis of the Wasteland Battlefield That Nobody Asked For, As Well As Some Personal Musings

Been thinking about this for a while, and I'm ready to share my thoughts. Under the cut for length

So the Battlefield can be roughly divided into 3 parts: the outskirts, the fortress, and outside the temple. We'll start at the outskirts, where most people would enter during their first run (if they aren't being guided around by a more experienced player)

This part of the Battlefield is the most empty, with mainly dunes of sand and a few scattered weapons. Over on the left of this pic we find the first sign of conflict: a shield pierced through with a spear and abandoned on the ground (most notable both for its placement and the cluster of dark plants located here) A few more arms are scattered about this area, but it's primarily empty, perhaps because of this:

These massive craters, almost perfect circles as you can see, are scattered around the outskirts, mainly in the area to the left of the fortress entrance. Strewn about the dunes around them are the few weapons in the outskirts. Given the five cannons located on top of the Wasteland temple, it's likely these were created by whatever those cannons fire (my money is on some kind of energy blast), and also that they would have absolutely destroyed anything—or anyone—struck by them

The cannons in question, visible as the 5 propaganda-topped spires atop the temple

Moving along, we come to the entrance of the fortress, where we start to see a kind of blockade that I believe to be the Sky Kingdom's version of chevaux de frise (French for "Frisian horses," with the singular being cheval de frise), clustered around what would have been the main entrance of the fortress

For reference, one used historically:

These types of blockades were primarily used as anti-cavalry defense. Given that all known light creatures are capable of flight, and considering that a) there are 2 types of shields with noticeably different crests on them in the area, and b) the ancestor spirits were not capable of flight and instead used flying boats to travel the skies, it's likely that these were intended to be used against some kind of grounded enemy, most likely a faction rebelling against the Sky Kingdom for some reason

Considering the size of the weapons we can see lying around, it's also likely that the people on both sides of the conflict were nearing the height of the Wasteland Elder, but I digress

Back to the fortress:

Given certain architectural details and the setup of the propaganda statues before the temple, the fortress appears to have been a separate building from the Wasteland Temple, likely situated at the near edge of the cannons' firing range so as to minimize friendly fire. A bird statue like the one found in Hidden Forest's boneyard is located roughly in the middle, and is the only other one found in the realms besides the Forest one. It's worth noting that these statues are located in the areas where the danger levels can (permanently) change

To the left of the fortress are some very sparse ruins that don't have a lot of info. A possible theory is that it was a supply building of some kind. Given its proximity to the majority of the cannon craters, it's likely that the enemy targeted this side first, for whatever reason

To the right of the fortress, we can find pipes leading to the Shipwreck/Crab Fields, although the lack of weapons suggest that the Crab Fields side was not really part of the battle. Likely, given the propaganda statue on top of the ship, whoever attacked made sure that the Sky Kingdom couldn't attack from 2 sides, with one force coming from the temple and the other coming from the Crab Fields

After that, we have the temple's exterior, where the main part of the battle appears to have taken place. More chevaux de frise are scattered between the temple and the fortress, as well as numerous swords, spears, and the 2 shield types—the vast majority of weapons found anywhere in the Wasteland are situated here. The only other places where weapons can be found (excluding those in Eden), are a single sword located by the Graveyard catapult, and 2 spears marking the way to the dock leading to the Forgotten Ark

Additionally, a version of the gate switch platform located here is also where Tsadi/the Wasteland Elder's cutscene takes place

Speaking of the gate switch, it's interesting that the 3 dark dragons located here seem to be keyed to its activation. Not even standing directly over them (or coming into contact with their sleeping bodies, if you glitch under the sand and water) is enough to wake them up, but a single switch located far from their resting places is?

We can rule out sound as what triggers them to wake up, as krill have so far shown themselves to be deaf, and while it's possible the vibrations of the gate opening are what did it, why wouldn't they react to our footsteps overhead if that was the case? Additionally, when they wake up, they immediately move to investigate the gate switch platform, and then afterwards only patrol the area between the fortress entrance and the temple

Were they set to guard the temple? Was there something the Sky Kingdom wanted to keep out... or in?

Anyways, that's my analysis of the Battlefield. Stay tuned for an angsty thought about the krill themselves that popped into my head while I was writing this!

[russianwave]

Subreddits can be a great way of exchanging useful resources, methods, and ask questions about the language you’re learning. But not everyone knows how to easily find one dedicated to their target language/s. So I’ve created a directory of all the ones I could find under this read more.

Note: Whilst there are country-specific subreddits for a lot of these languages, unless they explicitly mentioned accepting language questions I left it out. I also used a subreddit’s list of languages, so please excuse any weird ordering.

If you have an active subreddit dedicated to learning a language/linguistics/translations please let me know and I’ll add it. This includes conlangs! If you think I’ve left out an active subreddit please let me know and I’ll add it!

Afrikaans

r/Afrikaans

r/LearnAfrikaans

Ainu (アィヌ)

r/Ainu 

American Sign Language (ASL)

r/ASL

Ancient languages

r/AncientGreek

r/Latin

r/LatinLanguage

r/Koine

r/Nahuatl

r/OldNorse

Arabic 

r/learn_arabic (Egyptian, MSA, Levantine, Khaliji, Classical)

Aramaic

r/Aramaic

Armenian

r/Hayeren

Basque

r/Basque 

Breton

r/Breton

Bulgarian

r/Bulgarian

Catalan

r/Catalan

Cherokee

r/Cherokee

Chinese 

r/Cantonese 

r/Chinese

r/Chineselanguage

r/ClassicalChinese

r/Hakka

r/ohtaigi

r/Shanghainese

Chinuk Wawa

r/Chinookjargon

Cornish

r/CornishLanguage

Croatian 

r/Croatian

Czech

r/LearnCzech

r/Czech (The board itself isn’t dedicated to learning the language but they do have a discord server and Reddit chatroom dedicated to learning it)

Danish

r/DanishLanguage

Dutch

r/LearnDutch

English (ESL)

r/EnglishLearning

r/Grammar

r/ENGLISH

Esperanto

r/Esperanto

Faroese

r/Faroese

Finnish

r/LearnFinnish

French

r/French

r/FrenchImmersion

r/FrenchHelp

r/LearnFrench

r/writestreak

Frisian 

r/Frysk (West Frisian)

German r/German

r/PAGerman (Pennsylvania German, must get invited by moderators to access)

Gothic

r/GothicLanguage

Greek 

r/Greek

Hawaii

r/olelohawaii

Hebrew

r/Hebrew

Hindi

r/Hindi

r/LearnHindi

Hungarian

r/Hungarian

Icelandic

r/LearnIcelandic

Inuktitut

r/Inuktitut

Indonesian

r/Indonesian

Irish

r/Gaeilge

Italian

r/Italianlearning

r/Italian

Japanese

r/LearnJapanese

r/Japanese

r/LearnKanji

r/JapaneseResources

r/SpeakJapanese

r/JapaneseInTheWild

r/Nihongo

r/NHKEasyNews

Kannada

r/Kannada

Khmer 

r/LearnKhmer

Korean

r/Korean

Kurdish 

r/Kurdish

Latvian

r/LearnLatvian

Luxembourgish

r/LearnLuxembourgish

Malayalam

r/Malayalam_Language

r/Malayalam

Malaysian

r/bahasamelayu

Maori 

r/ReoMaori

Mongolian

r/Mongolian

Norwegian

r/Norsk

Ojibwe

r/Ojibwemodaa

Persian (Farsi)

r/LearnFarsi

r/Farsi

Polish

r/LearnPolish

Portuguese

r/Portuguese

Quechua

r/LearnQuechua

Romanian

r/Romanian

Russian

r/Russian

Scottish Gaelic

r/gaidhlig

Serbian

r/Serbian

Somali

r/LearnSomali

Spanish 

r/Spanish

r/LearnSpanish

r/SpanishHelp

r/writestreakes

Swahili

r/Swahili

Swedish

r/Svenska

r/LearnSwedish

Tagalog 

r/Tagalog

Telugu

r/Telugu

Thai

r/LearnThai

Tibetan

r/TibetanLanguage

Turkish

r/TurkishLearning

r/Turkish

Ukrainian

r/Ukrainian

Urdu

r/Urdu

Vietnamese

r/LearnVietnamese

Welsh

r/LearnWelsh

Miscellaneous: Subreddits dedicated to learning languages in general, fantasy languages, conlangs, linguistics, or a range of languages

r/indigenous_languages

r/LanguageLearning

r/Linguistics

r/Conlangs

r/badlinguistics

r/asklinguistics

r/language

r/logophilia

r/etymology

r/language_exchange

r/doesnottranslate

r/fullforeignmovies

r/judgemyaccent

r/languagelearningjerk

r/translationstudies

r/translator

r/LearnDothraki

r/tlhInganHol (Klingon)

r/Lojban

r/Ido

r/Sindarin

r/tokipona

r/volapuk

[the-fae-folk]

What is Ardri exactly? I can't quite visualize him.

Hmm. That’s a fun question. I’d never considered it before, just thinking of him as a generic humanoid Faerie. But I suppose he might fit into some category. Let’s see... He’s the son of a dryad who lives in a Beech Tree and a Faerie who is described as "The spirit of the still pool below the thorn bush”. The latter is likely some kind of water sprite or nixie. It’s worth noting that the nix of Germanic folklore were shapeshifters who could take many forms such as dragons, fish, and even human. And they are related to a number of similar mythological beings from various parts of Europe, such as the Ceffyl Dŵr from Welsh Mythology and the Kelpie from Scottish Myths. Both of these had the power to transform themselves into horses and trample people or drown them by letting them climb onto their backs and then diving down to the bottom of the pool. So we have two Faeries, one a humanoid tree spirit and one who is a spirit that can shapeshift though often takes a humanoid form. It’s not surprising that Ardri’s form is humanoid as well. We could call Ardri an Elf, though he has little connection to the Dökkálfar and the Ljósálfar of Norse mythology. If anything he might be similar to Elfs as they were seen in Middle English and Early Modern Scottish folklore. During the Middle Ages the term Elf became loosely synonymous with the borrowed French word “Fairy”, and the creatures were often conflated with beings like hobgoblins, brownies, dwarves, pucks, and hobs. Sometimes they were human sized, other times they were small. Somewhat connected is the old High German word “Alp” is defined by the Althochdeutsches Wörterbuch (Old High German Dictionary) as a sort of nature god or nature daemon. Another creature he could be is the Irish púca, another nature spirit who could be either benevolent or malevolent depending on its whims. Said to be a Faerie who could shapeshift into all manner of creatures such as a goat, cat, dog, hare, and even a horse. This would not only tie him back to the shape changing Nixies and Nixs of Germanic folklore who could transform their shape as well as the Scottish Kelpie who specifically took a horse form but it also connects him right back to the pucks. (A side note: The Astronomer who fled his court and shed his humanoid form in favor of a rabbit, and dwelt upon deserts of Faerie’s moons, is likely a púca.) Puck you might know from Shakespeare’s “A Midsummer Night’s Dream”. The name has possible sources in Old Norse (púki) with later variations traveling into Old Swedish, Icelandic, and Frisian. It also is suggested to be connected to Welsh (pwca), Cornish (bucca), and Irish (púca). All of these are suggested to have some linguistic connection through the movement of the word, though scholars disagree on which direction the linguistic borrowing might have gone. Shakespeare identified Puck as a Hobgoblin or hob, and he’s considered a domestic nature sprite, daimon, or fairy. Hobgoblins are houshold spirits or goblins that are very similar to stories of Brownies. Hob is just another name for a rustic countryside goblin. Hobs and Hobgoblins in folklore can be mischievous and cause chaos and hurt, but can also offer aid and do good deeds under the right circumstances. Goblins, hobs, hobgoblins, brownies, boggles, and many more have similar twisted and tied connections such that its impossible to really separate them in older Folklore, though contemporary literature has made many of them into distinct species of Faerie. I’m getting distracted... Diving into Folklore is a rabbit hole that is far too easy to get lost in forever. Your question had to do with the appearance of Ardri. So what is he? If anything he falls into this weird tangle of folklore that often depicts humanoid creatures of various sizes, temperaments, and appearances. He’s clearly related to nature, both the folklore and his mothers make that certain. Personally I think he’s likely to be a Hob, Brownie, or púca. All three had humanoid forms and sizes at one point in folklore, though they diverged in the stories later on. So, Ardri is not only humanoid but is roughly about the size of a human teenager as well, which is why he managed to pass so easily as a human during his two forays into their world. He is somewhere around sixteen or seventeen years of age by human reckoning, the same age as Sam and a little older than Oliver. He’s slightly shorter than your average 17 year old human male, but since human height varies so widely it wouldn’t be noticed much. He is lithe and strong, having spent his youth running through the woods, climbing trees, swimming in the river, and generally being active. His fair skin is slightly freckled from his youth in the sun while his hair is chestnut brown in color and hangs down to his shoulders. His eyes are hazel coloured and depending on the lighting might seem more brown, green, or even gold. Ardri will often have a friendly and enthusiastic smile, though it will occasionally show a light of mischief or laughter. I hope my extensive rambling response answers your question adequately. It’s likely far more than you were expecting to receive. I will admit I got carried away once I began diving in to the different faerie types, but it all made for a very fun evening project.

[coldalbion]

Good morning. I was wondering how much wisdom Odin produces on his own? A while ago you said he transforms himself according to the new information, like cutting his eye out at the well. I was thinking of American Gods, Wednesday’s last conversation with Vulcan has similarities to Nancy’s conversation with Ibis. Odin is a bastard, this is well known. I wonder if he’s the original cultural appropriation guy. I imagine he validates the new info like the borg, whereas those that cosplay don’t.

Depends what you mean by “produce” I suppose. In my experience, I wouldn’t say he’s a cultural appropriator within the context of taking-from-a-group- and-claiming-as-own/being better than originators. If anything, lore suggest he engages with things and practices on their own terms - he becomes a woman with the witches. He gains the runes through pain and privation. In  Grímnismál  he allows himself to be put between the two fires and is essentially tortured. He’s a god. He doesn’t have to put up with that, but he does. In a sense, it is less that he takes, and more that he adds-to-himself. That’s to say, Odin is rune magician and seidh-master. These are, at first glance two separate praxes. They require different things, different ways. What unites them in this context is Odin. He is the one who performs them. In this sense, he’s not the Borg because the Borg add to the Collective and in doing so, change themselves but also erase difference.  My experience is that the Old Man glories in, and enhances difference.  A key point to consider is where the phenomenon of bricolage  comes in (from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bricolage): “Anthropology In anthropology, the term has been used in several ways. Most notably, Claude Lévi-Strauss invoked the concept of bricolage to refer to the process that leads to the creation of mythical thought, which "expresses itself by means of a heterogeneous repertoire which, even if extensive, is nevertheless limited. It has to use this repertoire, however, whatever the task in hand because it has nothing else at its disposal" [7]. Later, Hervé Varenne and Jill Koyama used the term when explaining the processual aspect of culture, i.e., education Literature In literature, bricolage is affected by intertextuality, the shaping of a text's meanings by reference to other texts. Cultural studies In cultural studies bricolage is used to mean the processes by which people acquire objects from across social divisions to create new cultural identities. In particular, it is a feature of subcultures such as the punk movement. Here, objects that possess one meaning (or no meaning) in the dominant culture are acquired and given a new, often subversive meaning. For example, the safety pin became a form of decoration in punk culture. Social psychology The term "psychological bricolage" is used to explain the mental processes through which an individual develops novel solutions to problems by making use of previously unrelated knowledge or ideas they already possess. The term, introduced by Jeffrey Sanchez-Burks, Matthew J. Karlesky and Fiona Lee[10]The Oxford Handbook of Creativity, Innovation, and Entrepreneurship of the University of Michigan, draws from two separate disciplines. The first, “social bricolage,” was introduced by cultural anthropologist Claude Lévi-Strauss in 1962. Lévi-Strauss was interested in how societies create novel solutions by using resources that already exist in the collective social consciousness. The second, "creative cognition,” is an intra-psychic approach to studying how individuals retrieve and recombine knowledge in new ways. Psychological bricolage, therefore, refers to the cognitive processes that enable individuals to retrieve and recombine previously unrelated knowledge they already possess.[11][12] Psychological bricolage is an intra-individual process akin to Karl E. Weick’s notion of bricolage in organizations, which is akin to Lévi-Strauss' notion of bricolage in societies.[ Philosophy In his book The Savage Mind (1962, English translation 1966), French anthropologist Claude Lévi-Strauss used "bricolage" to describe the characteristic patterns of mythological thought. In his description it is opposed to the engineers' creative thinking, which proceeds from goals to means. Mythical thought, according to Lévi-Strauss, attempts to re-use available materials in order to solve new problems.[14][15][16]Jacques Derrida extends this notion to any discourse. "If one calls bricolage the necessity of borrowing one's concept from the text of a heritage which is more or less coherent or ruined, it must be said that every discourse is bricoleur."[17]Gilles Deleuze and Félix Guattari, in their 1972 book Anti-Oedipus, identify bricolage as the characteristic mode of production of the schizophrenic producer.[18]” So given the above, particularly in reference to the re-use of available materials, we find ourselves presented with a very Odinic situation. It’s my contention that bricolage can be used as a justification for cultural appropriation - but it’s a bad one, because for me the essence of magic is the poiesis; the bringing-forth from something that no-one else can bring-forth from. Ordinary people can do things in ordinary ways but the magician is by definition outside of the ordinary - literally extra-ordinary. Not only that, but because of this position, they are able to re-order the ordinary, and thus, everything they contact can be rendered extra-ordinary. In this sense, one could argue that this ability to take restrained or limited context and proper/achieve one’s goals is literally the “spinning straw into gold” of Rumpelstiltskin, the lead into gold of the alchemists, etc. In another, this places magicians - of which Odin is an exemplar- at root as uncanny, almost Lovecraftian monstrosities. This, in one way, renders the occult in its original context of being hidden. That is, it is imperceptible to those who have not been initiated or reconfigured in order to perceive it. It’s important to note that the etymology of perceive is actually rooted in grasping: perceive (v.)c. 1300, perceiven, "become aware of, gain knowledge of," especially "to come to know by direct experience," via Anglo-French parceif, Old North French *perceivre (Old French perçoivre) "perceive, notice, see; recognize, understand," from Latin percipere "obtain, gather, seize entirely, take possession of," also, figuratively, "to grasp with the mind, learn, comprehend," literally "to take entirely," from per "thoroughly" (see per) + capere "to grasp, take," from PIE root *kap- "to grasp."

seize (v.)mid-13c., from Old French seisir "to take possession of, take by force; put in possession of, bestow upon" (Modern French saisir), from Late Latin sacire, which is generally held to be from a Germanic source, but the exact origin is uncertain. Perhaps from Frankish *sakjan "lay claim to" (compare Gothic sokjan, Old English secan "to seek;" see seek). Or perhaps from Proto-Germanic *satjan "to place" (see set (v.)).

Combine this with the common sense of possession in a spiritual context, and we arrive at something Jung wrote in his essay on Wotan in the 1930′s: Perhaps we may sum up this general phenomenon as Ergriffenheit — a state of being seized or possessed. The term postulates not only an Ergriffener (one who is seized) but, also, an Ergreifer (one who seizes). Wotan is an Ergreifer of men, and, unless one wishes to deify Hitler– which has indeed actually happened — he is really the only explanation. It is true that Wotan shares this quality with his cousin Dionysus, but Dionysus seems to have exercised his influence mainly on women. The maenads were a species of female storm-troopers, and, according to mythical reports, were dangerous enough. Wotan confined himself to the berserkers, who found their vocation as the Blackshirts of mythical kings. Leaving aside whether National Socialism was a kind of madness that seized the world (spoiler: the time period was a perfect storm for horrors) and blaming it on Wotan, Jung’s language is important here - particular because it signals a polarity between seizer and seized. Consider Odin’s role as world-creator in Norse myth. He (and his brothers) seize the giant Ymir, kill him, and in supreme butchery, render his corpse into the worlds we know. Taking one thing, they use it to make another - and it is important to note that, according to mythological genealogy, Ymir is Odin’s maternal ancestor - he is not separate from the jotnar.  Rather, he re-orders their potencies to make the world, and since those potencies are inside him, re-orders his own ancestral potencies into that which humans might call god as distinct from jotun. In this sense, we all do this - our lives, bodies and minds are recapitulations and reconfigurations of our ancestors in new forms. When we suggest that “We are our deeds” or whatever, it is a mistake to ignore that the faculties to perform those deeds come from faculties bestowed on us by environment and heredity. How we experience things depends on how we are configured - though such configuration is constantly shifting due to constant inputs. Nevertheless, the fact remains that the magician deliberately seeks out that  reconfigurative reflex. seek (v.)Old English secan "inquire, search for; pursue; long for, wish for, desire; look for, expect from," influenced by Old Norse soekja, both from Proto-Germanic *sakanan (source also of Old Saxon sokian, Old Frisian seka, Middle Dutch soekan, Old High German suohhan, German suchen, Gothic sokjan), from PIE *sag-yo-, from root *sag- "to track down, seek out" (source also of Latin sagire "to perceive quickly or keenly," sagus "presaging, predicting," Old Irish saigim "seek"). The natural modern form of the Anglo-Saxon word as uninfluenced by Norse is in beseech. This desire, this hunt, can be clearly seen in an Odinic/Dionysiac furor complex - combined with *wen:   *wen- (1)Proto-Indo-European root meaning "to desire, strive for."It forms all or part of: vanadium; Vanir; venerate; veneration; venerable; venereal; venery (n.1) "pursuit of sexual pleasure;" venery (n.2) "hunting, the sports of the chase;" venial; venison; venom; Venus; wean; ween; Wend "Slavic people of eastern Germany;" win; winsome; wish; wont; wynn.It is the hypothetical source of/evidence for its existence is provided by: Sanskrit veti "follows after," vanas- "desire," vanati "desires, loves, wins;" Avestan vanaiti "he wishes, is victorious;" Latin venerari "to worship," venus "love, sexual desire; loveliness, beauty;" Old English wynn "joy," wunian "to dwell," wenian "to accustom, train, wean," wyscan "to wish." Note the reference to Vanir and Vanadis (by way of vanadium) as well as Venus. That there is a polarity betwixt hunter and hunted is obvious, as with sexual partners (regardless of gender or sex it is two -or more - parties conjoined by desire) and also in the notion of veneration, and winning/victory.

So, perhaps more properly, we might argue that the magician goes-into the world in a more intense fashion - not with the principle of union-with, or reduction to Oneness. Rather, towards profusion  of difference, of options and room-to-move. A peculiar notion of freedom via absolute restraint ; enhanced negative-capability. In such a context, to culturally appropriate is to defang the numinous, make it more palatable, more ordinary. To commodity it. I do not think Yggr, the Terrible One, would do so for mere “safety’s-sake”. Maybe that’s just me though.  

[eurosong]

My ESC ‘20 ranking

Good morning folks, on this rather melancholy “Eurovision day.” Whilst this year may be cancelled and its songs pretty callously binned by the EBU, 2020 was a diverse year that deserves taking a close look at too, so here goes my customary full ranking of the year. I express some candid opinions, but they are just my take on things, no shade intended if you disagree.

41. Estonia - What love is It’s always most difficult to pick a last place because, no matter how sleek Eurovision gets, there are still a few abject horrors that sneak into the contest. With a score that would have been dated 30 years back, and lyrics that manage the peculiar double act of being both pompous and anodyne, this is horrid enough before Uku’s dubious xenophobic comments and his prevailing over a field of much more compelling songs get taken into account.

40. Macedonia - You The Macedonians, having achieved their best result ever last year (I’m happy for them, but also, Kaliopi deserved that), decided that they soared too close to the sun with Proud and decided to crash land this year to build their energy to soar again. That’s the only reasonable explanation I have for this effort which deeply repels me, doubling down on Luca Hänni’s “cocky guy in a sleazy bar” æsthetics and adds to it even worse lyrics, castrato singing and the unintended levity of the interpreter being far more interested in the bartender. Also one of a maddening number of duplicate titles that were nowhere near as good as the originals.

39. Cyprus - Running What is this void in the space of a song? I’ve listened to it dozens of times to do ratings over the past months. I’m still left with an icy emptiness because it does nothing to me, says nothing to me. The only thing that I can say in its favour is that it’s not a replay of replay aka Fuego 3. That’s it. It’s like it’s designed to leave little impression and hope to cruise by on diaspora and friendly votes alone.

38. Austria - Alive Austria have been on an interesting Eurovision journey, going from winning with Conchita to serving up this chirpy homophobe doing his best impression of Timberlake. A monumental step back from the singular tenderness of Pænda.

37. France - Mon alliée (The best in me) La déception de l’année sans doute. France, one of Europe’s cultural powerhouses, really said “forget Destination Eurovision, which showcased our music scene’s diversity and was one of the fandom’s favourite newer NFs. Let’s abolish it all and bring in the guys who made Bigger than us, because we really want a piece of that Big 5 bottom place action! Let’s throw away our cultural caché and get something about as French as flatpack furniture!”

This is like going to a pricey restaurant in Paris, expecting haute cuisine and instead getting some microwave-reheated IKEA köttbullar. And can we talk about how Amir of J’ai cherché fame is partly to “thank” for this in one of the biggest heel turns of the year? It’s like he wanted to ensure that France TV beg him to return by safeguarding his excellent score from being equalled. I also have to say, Tom Leeb seems like a nice guy with a good voice. He did his best to salvage this with the acoustic version, which lifts it up a few places. But not so many given that that Westlife reject b-side ending with a key change remains.

36. Germany - Violent thing Speaking of major cultural players dumping their national finals for no good reason, guten Tag, Deutschland! Germany once had one of the best and certainly most diverse NFs going. Instead of dumping Barbara Schönenberger as hostess - every year she’s presented, Germany have had calamity, and the one year they did well, 2018, she wasn’t host - they decided to pin all their hopes on a bewildered looking gossoon from Slovenia with yet another Timberclone song and some rather dubious live vox. As his countrywoman Lea Sirk said, it’s a hvala ne from me.

35. Spain - Universo Yes, it’s another year of the Big 5 not living up to its automatic qualification rights (except you, Italy, thank you for being the exception to the rule.) So here we’ve got a bland effort from Spain to avoid being bottom 5, except that ain’t how ESC works - you need something to get people to waste their money on voting for your song. And for me, this surely is not it. This was a bit higher on my ranking before because there are more objectively objectionable songs out there. But the nonsensical, repetitive lyrics, the painful attempt at a high note on perdónameeee, and getting stuck on a bus where I had to put up said screeching being played 5+ times means #35 is about right for where it deserves.

34. Armenia - Chains on you Armenia, usually a reliable mainstay in the top half of my listings at least, instead served up one of the most bewilderingly impalatable NFs of the season where every song sounded imported from the ESC anni horribili of the 00s. This has grown on me a little bit - I like tin drums and I like her weird accent - but the lyrics are amongst the year’s most pitiful (“ya wanna take me to a party, because you’re naughty”) and it just feels cheep to me. 33. Bulgaria - Tears getting sober I don’t see the appeal in this bewildering merger of dirge and Disney, and this is coming from someone who likes melancholic music more times than not. I find this one straight up unpleasant to listen to. The lyrics are of someone passive-aggressively glorying in the pain they wallow in to return the hurt, in “look how much you’re making me hurt myself” style. The syrupy score replete with key change is a bizarre, ghoulish accompaniment. Only this high because I recognise some artistic merit in its production.

32. Azerbaijan - Cleopatra Are Azerbaijan now at the stage where they’ve decided to pastiche themselves? The country with the worst LGBT rights of all contesting ESC having the monumental neck to send a song about “gay or straight or in between”? The country who have almost religiously avoided sending anything with any actual Azeri national character or heritage sending a song written by a Canadian, an American and a Frisian about a Greek-Egyptian ruler with a Japanese mantra and Latin affectations, so sending us around the world to pretty much everywhere except Azerbaijan? What can I say in favour of it? It’s a little bit catchy. So are venereal diseases.

31. Poland - Empires How can a country who started their ESC journey with aplomb - and experimental gems like Sama and Chcę znać swój grzech - and who continue to serve in the junior contest, how can they be so almost studiedly bland in ESC these days? This is our 564th knockoff Bond tune, sung a little awkwardly and with lyrics written by a Year 8 who’s been given a creätive writing assignment where they have to use metaphors. “We’re gasoline and a match!” Wow. If it passed to the final, it would only because of loyal Poles abroad.

30. Greece - Superg!rl We leave the territory of complete dirges and enter that of songs I can sort of live with. This one’s a huge step back for the Hellenes though after the gorgeous Better love. Its odd chorus is memorable, but not for the best reasons. Its saving grace is its unintentionally humorous promotional video. A better use of those superpowers would have been to come up with a better song.

29. Moldova - Prison Remember the fun Moldova that used to bring songs like Hora din Moldova and Lautar, with some actual national flavour and flair? That’s long gone. Even the Moldova that brought terrible songs but fun stagings, like that of My lucky day, seems far lost into the fogs of time too. Another wholly unremarkable and mediocre production of the Scream Team that would be lucky to scrape into the finals.  28. Belgium - Release me Has Belgium learnt absolutely nothing in the years Blanche where the wheels of their ESC renaissance have fallen decidedly off? My feeling is no. I have to salute them to some degree for creating nice, very musical compositions, but just like in the past two years, they have forgotten to add a few key elements: some sense of progression or dynamism. This plods along repetitively on one track, one note, and that note is nice enough as background music, but my hunch is that track would have led them to another unsurprising “surprise” NQ.

27. Serbia - Hasta la vista It’s an earworm, but some earworms leave you wanting to get an aural exorcism. Somehow, some sort of collective insanity overcame Serbia and they decided to dump on their beautiful oeuvre of songs, go completely against their trend for qualitative, classical, brooding, orchestral music by instead picking a bunch of time travellers who had been a third rate girl band in Transnistria. How enough Serbians thought they’d win over Europe by going for a sound that was dated even when they made their début bemuses me. 26. UK - My last breath The UK are really soaring high in my rankings as... the last amongst the 26 songs that would make up my notional perfect final. Baby steps. I still think it’s pretty lame how the BBC tanked their own national final for this. It’s not so adventurous. It has so little to say that it’s half a minute shorter than the ESC standard and yet still consists of repetition. It has one of the most annoying chorus quirks with that beat in “my last... breath.” How did this get up this high again?

25. Albania - Fall from the sky It absolutely pains my heart to put Albania out of the top 20 after two thunderous years in which they captured my gold and bronze respectively. What makes it worse is that they could have had a perfect hat-trick, because the original, Albanian language version “Shaj” was my #1 song from December up until mid-March when they released this thin gruel of a revamp with all the things that gave Shaj some authenticity and flavour gone, and with beautiful, heart-rending lyrics replaced with cliché. Only this high because there are plenty of worse songs.

24. Czechia - Kemama I have a soft spot for poor Benny, the interpreter of this song. Ok, so it beat a field containing some vastly superior songs, but it’s nice to have a Czech song without weird lyrics about women for the first time in a while, and the way the kid was put through the ringer for his more Afrobeat-influenced revamp made me sad. For me, it gained a bit of flavour with that change. The lyrics are still poor but I like the colourful musical backdrop.

23. Israël - Feker libi 🇮🇱 Sometimes, you don’t think much of a song but the artist elevates it enormously. Such is the case with Feker libi, a bizarre pot pourri of styles with a very discordant tropical verse (which I like), mid-90s dance track chorus (which I don’t), middle eastern post-chorus and African-sounding outro (jury’s out on both.) Yet Eden Alene is so full of natural charm and exudes “I want to be your friend” that I can’t help but rewatch just because of how joyous she makes it.

22. San Marino - Freaky 🇸🇲 Speaking of atypical countries flying high in my ranking, all was set for San Marrano to take non-pride of place at the bottom of my ranks yet again, but somehow, I ended up quite enjoying their track this year. Yes, San Marino is still a weird zone where, when you descend to Rimini in Italy, you enter the new millennium, but returning up the tiny nation’s steep slopes, you head back to a time in the 70s when disko was king. This disco is fun though. In part thanks to Senhit, a sympathetic performer who deserved more in 2011, in part the lyrics - who doesn’t want to rip up the rules, write new ones and then destroy them too?

22. Switzerland - Répondez-moi It’s nice to have the Swiss singing in a national language for the first time in ages. It’s also nice that they didn’t fall back on their success with Hänni by going with a similar so-called bOp. I also really love some of the artist’s other tracks, like Babi. And I liked this a fair bit more upon first listen, but the combination of less than stellar lyrics - just a succession of somewhat emoïsh rhetorical questions; just because they’re in French, doesn’t make them deep - and a wailing falsetto have made my will to relisten to this often take a serious hit for me. A shame, as musically, it has some undoubted quality. 20. Denmark - Yes 🇩🇰 Denmark seems to be doubling down on 2019 to develop its new niche - catchy, sweet but ultimately a little overly gooey love songs. There’s always something a little bit imperfect about them though: last year it was Leonora’s serial killer-esque nervous gaze; this year, it’s the “I’m not going to even try to make pretend we’re an item” lack of energy from Tan. It’s a little bit too reheated “Little talks” but it’s decent enough.

19. Russia - Uno 🇷🇺 When this first was released, days after the deadline for submitting songs, I was pretty peeved at what seemed like a pisstake against the contest, a bizarre rehash of Aqua for the meme age. And yet.. maybe it’s the quarantine slowly driving me insane, maybe it’s the sheer infectiousness of this that just makes you want to dance, maybe it’s the epic energy of the backing singer (Rosa from Brooklyn 99’s twin) who looks like she wants to kill everyone else... but I’ve actually grown to like this enough to put it top 20. I’m not always entirely predictable!

18. Norway - Attention 🇳🇴 There’s a lot of things that tick my yes boxes with this song, like the beautiful orchestral music laid out by the famed Mørland or the simple but sincere performance. There are also things that take a Sharpie and scrawl in my no boxes too, like the somewhat whiny tone of the vocals or the adolescent and lyrics which, with their “oy’d change anyffink abaat moyself fur a boi” tone, don’t flatter the singer, and from Mørland, I expect better. There’s more good than bad here though, and it has been an earworm since the day it was selected.

17. Belarus - Da widna 🇧🇾 I don’t know what was in the water this year, but we got a bunch of great Slavic language songs, including from countries that don’t typically send songs except in English. I like the chilled out vibe and the curious lyrics. Their live version for Eurovision Home Concerts with just an acoustic guitar sounded a whole lot better, I must say.

16. Australia - Don’t break me 🇦🇺 I’m finally overcoming the horror of the bizarre clown mise-en-scène complete with ropey lyrics at Australia decides and judging this on its potential. Hands down Australia’s best entry at the contest for me. Musically, it’s strong, and lyrically, it’s compelling and very saudadic. I’m sad we won’t see what a glow-up their final staging could have provided. I really hope it wouldn’t have involved clowns, which seriously tanked the song in my ranking for months, no joke.

15. Portugal - Medo de sentir 🇵🇹 A Portuguese entry outside of my top ten? Given their form with me since 2015, this might seem like a harbinger of the apocalypse. I still like it quite a bit, but there are stronger songs this time. It’s heartfelt, the lyrics are powerful (about being afraid to feel again after being hurt) and the melody is pretty. The live was a bit cagey especially because of the not particularly well synchronised voices of Elisa and the pianist, who composed the song. Still a very nice song and it is great to see Portugal staying faithful to its language, but I can’t help but feel sad that songs more in line with its riskier, more trailblazing previous few years. Passe-partout or Gerbera amarela do sul would have been in my top 3 like last year.

14. Latvia - Still breathing 🇱🇻 If you told me in January that not only would this song not be disliked, it’d also end up in my top 15 of the year, I’m sure incredulous laughter would have been the most polite response you’d have probably gotten. And yet - the song I couldn’t stand in Supernova has won me over and I do want to see Samanta Tina return for 2021 since she evidently cares so deeply about ESC so is pretty much one of us. I’ve come to love the weirdness of the track - real meat and gravy given the number of anodyne tracks - the iconic pre-corona hygienic leitmotif of its staging. ST’s joie de vivre and command of the stage. It’d be a guilty pleasure except I don’t feel guilty for it.

13. Georgia - Take me as I am 🇬🇪 Georgia once again are dancing to the beats of their very anarchic drummer and I love them for that. This thinly veiled swipe at both the Big 5 coasting in mediocrity and at narrow-minded fans’ reäctions to Georgia’s extremely varied oeuvre just hits the spot for me. I love the musicality of it, the dark electro-rock vibes, Tornike’s voice and how it blends perfectly with his captivating backing singers. I always vote with my feet for something different in an era where people are aiming to qualify with safe and bland rather than taking risks.

12. Romania - Alcohol you 🇷🇴 Roxen provided one of the most iconic moments of the season by deliberately tanking the ordained bop amongst her national final songs. Her eventual song is one of the most emotional of the year, and also one of the most surprisingly literary: there are tonnes of nuances, allusions, wordplays and so forth in this text, most of which are a lot more graceful than the titular terrible pun. I humbly put it to folk who thinks that this romanticises alcohol that they are missing the point - it’s instead being used as a metaphor for toxic relations which, by the end of the song, Roxen has broken away from. I love her voice, I love the music. It fell briefly out of my affections because of the weird mini-revamp, but it’s risen again.

11. Ukraine - Solowej 🇺🇦 It’s fabulous to see Ukraine singing a song entirely in their language and I hope this trend continues across the Slavic nations like was notable this year. The timeless folksy elements mixing with modern beats makes a curious and entrancing blend, delivered with aplomb. It takes where Poland 2019 went wrong and puts it right. I could have done without the unnecessary revamp, but it’s still one of the year’s freshest cuts. Well done, Widbir!

10. Slovenia - Voda 🇸🇮 In an age where the likes of Albania is stripping away all the beautiful orchestral flourishes of its entry to make a pared and muted revamp, Slovenia went full throttle in the opposite - and in my mind, right - direction and made one of the very few good revamps of the season. Performing with the Budapest philharmonic orchestra, Ana Soklič, who, for my money, has one of the best female voices of the year, unleashed the cinematic, sweeping beauty of Voda. I think this would have surprised many people by doing quite well. On musical and vocal merit alone, and adding to that the subdued saudade of its lyrics, it deserved a lot more love.

09 Malta - All of my love 🇲🇹 In 2018, I would have sooner said that it was more probable for me to have become Grand-Duke of Luxembourg than it was for me to have loved a Maltese song, let alone two i n a r o w. I didn’t expect much of this at all, because I expected we’d get a wailing vocal exhibition, as Ian used to say, focused on exhibiting Destiny’s range rather than giving her a genuinely good song. But this is a genuinely good song. Once again, I love for the gospel edge it has, and Destiny’s vocals soar to impressive heights, without feeling unnatural or ostentatious. I should have known to expect good things with the regal Cesár Sampson on board.

08 Lithuania - On fire 🇱🇹 Prior to this year, few people had any hopes for Lithuania’s long-winded national final selection process. The idea of it being must-watch viewing when there were many other more compelling choices on offer was hilarious. In 2020, that changed. They changed the name to the hilarious but hopeful “Let’s try again”, had a number of fantastic songs, and became one of the most diverse and qualitative highlights of the NF season. The eventual winners, The Roop, deserved the accolade with this cool, super contemporary track with a brilliant dance routine and a genuinely important message about not giving up on yourself.

07. Sweden - Move 🇸🇪 At MF this year, the Swedes put a match to its protracted ‘cocky fuckboi with polished, soulless overproduced pop song’ era, hopefully for good, with an all-female top 4. I will always lament Dotter missing out narrowly, but I’ve still been brought plenty of joy by the radiant Mamas with their fabulous hand-choreography and genuine warmth, and this song of resilience through the tough times. I love gospel-tinged music and this really makes me smile.

06 Ireland - The story of my life 🇮🇪 Before this was announced, I heard Ireland’s track being compared to the oeuvre of pretty much every major 00s female pop star. I was quizzical, but upon hearing it, could see why. In a year with a lot of beige, this is just one big orange and yellow blast of colourful late 90s/early 00s nostalgia, hope, resilience. The kind of anthem I never knew I needed but came right on time. I can’t listen to its wry, conversational lyrics without wanting to dance along. And Lesley Roy herself is an icon. My favourite effort from Ireland since Playing by numbers, and I really hope she returns in 2021.

05 Finland - Looking back 🇫🇮 I’ll never forget a mural in the part of València where I used to live that said “we’re not different for the sake of being different”, and that could sum up my attitudes to Eurovision. Whilst it seemed almost everyone was behind Cicciolina in Finland, I had scant hope for my favourite, and was blown away when it actually did win. This melancholy meditation on the passing of time and people - “we never know what we have until it’s over and we’re looking back” - became emblematic of this year for me and added to what was already a really poignant and moving track. I love the musical style too and the smoothness of Aksel’s voice and how it contrasts with his evident awkward shyness. It has moved me so much that it had to end up top 5.

04 Croatia - Divlji vjetre 🇭🇷 I always will represent and bring love for the Balkans and their adhesion to their musical traditions. This was one of the most pleasant surprises of the NF season for me - I was expecting very little from Croatia, and instead, it greeted me with this beauty. You have the understated classic grace of the music, the exquisite melancholy and poeticism of the lyrics, and one of the finest male vocals of the season. My favourite Croatian track in almost 15 years.

03 Italy - Fai rumore 🇮🇹 Sanremo isn’t just a national final, it’s a cultural experience that digs into your heart over the course of a whole week. This was one of the most memorable I have followed yet - and what a truly deserving winner. It’s just another example of the seemingly endless supply of heartfelt tunes by classy, sincere performers that Italy has on tap, with one of the best lyrics of the contest and the extra level of poignancy from how the lyrical theme of isolation would come to represent us all.

02 Iceland - Think about things 🇮🇸 One of my nerviest and happiest moments of the entire NF season was seeing Daði Freyr and friends win Söngvakeppnin in Iceland. As much as I loved Svala’s Paper, I had also adored his song three years prior - the delightfully awkward and similarly irrepressably earwormy Is this love. And now he was back with a groovy, fun, heartwarming tune about fatherhood that has only continued to grow in my estimations. The bridge still full on gives me goosebumps. It’s the kind of song that just makes me marvel at being human and being on this earth.

01 Netherlands - Grow 🇳🇱 My top few songs are all very closely entwined so much so that they could be considered joint winners, but I’ve been pretty unequivocal ever since Shaj got torpedoed by its revampire: silver turned to gold and my previous 2nd place, Grow, became my new favourite. I love the heartfelt, sparsely poëtic, bravely confessional lyrics. I love the way that it goes from something minimalist and intimate with just organ and voice and slowly builds upon the hints of gospel to something truly anthemic. Such a meticulous arrangement where there’s not a single sound out of place. This song is pure art and, like Soldi, Mall, APD and all those preceding songs which had the magic of being my personal favourite, it moves me upon every listen.