#also timtams are fucking amazing

[zeroducks-2]

Zero, I need to rant about DC's mistreatment of my son.

Why can't Tim craft his own identity outside of Robin and Batman? Every other member in the Batfamily (not Damian just yet but idk if DC wants to do that considering all their writers are pushing for him to be either Ra's Heir or Batman's heir) who has been Robin is has distanced their new heroic identity away from their time as Robin.

For whatever reasons, the writers seem to be allergic to Tim growing as a character and stepping away from his identity of Robin. They couldn't even give him an original NAME. WTF IS RED ROBIN?? I'm so pressed about it because a alias is so important and unique to the hero and mostly tied to the core of their character, origin, or development.

Bruce chose Batman because he feared bats, and he wanted to be the fear that scared straight the criminals of Gotham.

Dick chose Robin because it was a way to carry on his parent's memory and legacy, and Nightwing was chosen due to Superman (Someone who Dick looks up to) telling Dick about the Kryptonian myth of Nightwing and Flamebird.

Clark got his superman alias from his father, one of the only parting gifts he has from him.

So Timmy, my dude, wtf is Red Robin about? I feel like it's such a cop out to him as a character. Like, we get why Robin was so important to him due to him being a freaky little lonely fanboy. But during his Robin run, he grew so so so much. Why would the DC Writers not let his growth show? Why also reduce and retie his identity to Robin?

Tim is known to be a great detective, it's one of his shining marks as a Batman protegee. Ra's al Ghul even states that Tim is a better detective than The Batman himself. Hell, when Tim was 14 he discovered that Dick was Nightwing and Robin, because his freaky loner obsession and past trauma of witnessing the flying Grayson's murder made him connect the dots when Dick was flipping and doing acrobatic feats that no one but an extremely skilled and gifted acrobat could do (Tricks that have only been successfully done by a fucking FLYING GRAYSON - note how silly and girlie pop Dick was for that one).

Like, fr DC, why not tie Tim's new identity with his amazing detective skills?

Honestly, I think DC could have taken some inspiration from an Edgar Allan Poe character and given Tim a detective-associated. Because, Poe's character C. Auguste Dupin, is literally the first ever detective we see in fiction and the backbone of how so many other detective character's created.

Like a name that inspired from the first ever detective himself would be so damn cool. And it would tie into Tim's origin as I'm pretty sure Tim is the first person who actually discovered Dick and Bruce's identities with just his raw and untrained detective skills. So a name like New August would be so damn cool.

Or hell, if DC didn't want to be even that level of creativity into his name and stick with the bird theme (because we all remember the Drake incident so well). Nightingale would be a cool (given not so original) name unless they wanted to spell it like Knightingale. They're one of the few birds who hunt at night, and it could also be a call back to the nurse Florence Nightingale who was a badass and known for the Nightingale theory of nursing:

"A nurse must use her brain, heart and hands to create healing environments"

AS IF that could translate into the hero world. Mister-Dropped-Out-Of-Med-School-Bruce-Wayne is foaming at the mouth.

To conclude, fuck DC and fuck them for doing my TimTam dirty. Let him be his own man :/

I don't agree with all of this but Tim does deserve better that's true. He's sort of stuck in limbo and his growth should have happened a long time ago tbh.

He could have been Flamebird like Dick is Nightwing to name one. Dick has always been his inspiration. Maybe Red Robin for a time (since back then he and Dick had grown apart), and then Flamebird after they reconciled.

It's sad because some of the main things with Tim are that love for him is conditional because of his shitty parents, and that he has a hard time crafting his own identity, and DC doesn't let him grow out of any of this and keeps using him as a chew toy. It's sad.

(and no being queer isn't character development)

[wtfuckevenknows]

Hi B 💗 I’d like to know what some of your fave things you did or ate or drank whilst you were down here in Aus please 👀 Also if you have a book recommendation too!

Listen, y’all need to cool it with the food asks because they always put me in an existential crisis and in this case YOU’RE MAKING ME WANT TO GET ON A FUCKING PLANE TO MELBOURNE AND I DONT EVEN LIKE MELBOURNE!!!! (But I’d get to visit you and @celeritas2997 so that’s a plus ❤️😘)

(Just kidding, but also not)

We’re starting with food and drink because obviously.

Melbourne has Lord of the fries and Lune Croissantarie and Yo-Chi and Green Cup.

I had the most amazing Lobster Ravioli (that I obviously don’t eat anymore) while living in Melbourne and I tried so many different types of fish I had never even heard of before.

Baked in Portsea has the bestest yummiest pastries and what not if you’re ever in the Mornington Peninsula. The things I’d give for their Hummus & Feta sandwich (in a very German multi seed bread roll). Also got this amazing Birthday cake!!!!

Sydney had yummy yummy Everything Bagel with Garlic Cream Cheese from Brooklyn Bros Bagel and the Peanut Butter Bar & Fishbowl.

There’s Cadbury Mini Eggs in Aus, and Chiobani and obviously TimTams although I find them too sweet these days. Had my first spider (not that good) and a very yummy spider (raspberry lemonade with vanilla ice cream). Schweppes Agrum!!!!!! I fell in love with these veggie things from Coles and whatever that thing on the right actually is (that I also wouldn’t eat anymore).

I did lots of awesome things in Oz with the limited time I had thanks to Corona but I swam with Dolphins in the ocean in Sorrento, I fell in love with my library in Sydney, I went to the amazing Cinderella exhibit at the Grounds of Alexandria, I biked down a mountain in Tassie with 50km/h, I took the ferry in Sydney a million times as one does, I’ve been on a 40 million dollar yacht (still the most surreal day of my life to this day 🥴)

AS FOR A BOOK REC:

Have you read A Good Girls Guide to Murder? The first one is the best one of the series (as it so often is but I do like the others too) and I hear they’re being made into a tv series I think?

[spaghett-onaplate]

When I was younger, if I went to the supermarket I was amazed that adults had the self control to get broccoli instead of timtams, and figured I'd spend all my money on chocolate and such when I got a job.

Well I did get a job recently, and gained some financial independence from that. And today I took a very pensive stroll through the supermarket and I kinda get it. With no possibility of buying all the treats, I wanted to. With the possibility, I hesitate - is it even really worth it? Ehh. So I made the very exciting purchases of iodine and batteries.

I mean, I still live at home so I don't need to buy broccoli or any other ingredients for dinners yet, or most general items

Though I am far from a paragon of saving money. I spent $300 on a (very cool) hoodie as the first use of paychecks. Quoted Karl Marx to say why it was not a bad idea (the less you eat, drink, go to the theater; the less you live, the bigger grows your capital, which neither moth nor rust can corrup,, etc. It's a good passage)

Anyways. Had an insightful supermarket wander today. Also learnt batteries are really fucking expensive, and for what ??

[enbyprentiss]

i have an oddly strong desire to try australian candy. i can’t explain it. i just feel like it’s incredible.

[ga-lee-tica]

this was definitely a birthday worth remembering

(feel free to ignore this, this is just me talking about my day)

Oh boy where do i start with today.

So today started normal. Getting ready for school. And then Boom everyone is saying happy birthday to me.

Four starting presents:

A pack of pastel pens

A pack of normal pens

I honestly didn't think that a giant chocolate coin would stay in wrapping paper without melting

An animal crossing glass. I love it so much. It has tom nook on one side and the acnh logo on the other.

Friends said happy birthday to me and i got a lollipop. This gave me an idea that i would do later.

My first class, health: not much hapoened. I got a happy birthday message fron her then i showed my magic trick which she loved.

My magic trick is showing someone a small item for my lunch like a lollipop or timtam, put it in my lunchbox and reach for the giant chocolate coin.

Group was next. Not much happened

In math i got to show my whole table the magic trick. They were jealous of the giant coin.

During breaktime i got the present from my best friend, it was a drawing of tommy, tenya ida and kyouka jirou (i have not seen mha but my friend is really into the series). I ate the coin, very nice.

Nothing happened in science.

At lunch i got a happy birthday message from the group teacher, then my and my friends were watching someone fail at cooking simulator, it was hilarious.

nothing in foods except me friend giving me a gift card for a gaimng shop and a happy b'day message from my art teacher, who was curious about my plans for the rest of the day.

after school i got to work a bit on my comic (part 4) and then went to get pizza. That was one of the best dinners ive had in my life. I also had my surprise party in animal crossing, who knew that a game with anthropomorphic animals living on an island can make you emotional?

when dinner was finished i went out to stargaze for the first time in a while and record a message to my future self. I love anything related to space and stargazing was definitely a calming coping strategy.

But the best surprise was at the end

A fucking piñata. In the shape of a flamingo.

Here is a summary on how that went:

Me: aww look at the flamingo. I don't want to hurt it.

Also me 3 seconds later: literally decapitates it in one swing

There was so much stuff in it. It mainly consisted of:

Money

Sweets

Heart confetti

Magenta streamer things. Like the thing you see on cheerleader's pompoms.

Everyone laughed at that. It was very funny.

The cake looked pretty

Then after the cake eating we went home. This was an amazing day filled with many different surprises

Update: Just counted the stuff in the piñata and found $100 and 2 bowls full of sweets. Well i guess i found my go-to snack when making comics

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

This is H2o au related so if u don't care for H2o au pls ignore (test post pls ignore)

How do I do a Read more on mobile

Fuck it ur all cursed with knowledge now

bitch is back on pc here’s a read more

I finally figured out the fucking TIMELINE for H2o au

That is the list of planets the black ops squad will be visiting on Serendipity (that's the name of their ship, it's the one they got after they had to scrap the Lorelei). Start: Pandora (obviously. They were all abandoned by Dahl). Then Eden-5 (I wanted a civilian/city based planet and hey it sounds like Gaige lives in, like, a suburb, so.) then Aphrodite (VENUS AMBASSADOR) which is a planet I (hopefully) made up to fit the venus ambassador plot I have going on (they get a politician sentenced to death by posing as him blah blah, long story, amazing song). Pandora again for a fun little climate changing jaunt to push people away. Junpai-7 BECAUSE GEARBOX WON'T STOP MENTIONING IT (also Cutlord Karuu is a vampire pirate queen and you all can fight me on that) where Zane meets Clay :D!! Then Erebus for the Obsidian Black (hynnng) part 1. Gaea for the Hephaestus United, then back to Erebus for Obsidian Black 2: Electric Boogaloo (also titled: Barnabas, you bastard) (also also titled: I cried writing up the concept for this because I hate killing characters).

Also imma just say it, the Eridians are straight bastards in this AU. Crazy scientist bastards. They have a huge god complex (and I mean so does the Obsidian Black Dr. Denman so HEY (BUT I MEAN WHICH CORPORATION DOESNT AY LMAO)) and we all are their 4th grade silver medal science fair project. They're kicking back in their home dimension drinking, idk, martinis or some shit, whatever it is aliens drink to get wasted, and, uh, eating... Croissants. Croissants aren't even like soley rich people food why the fuck did I pick croissants wtf. I should've said, like, lobster. And laughing at us. They are LAUGHING at us right now. Bastards. Stupid, science, God-complex having BASTARDS. See. It's like. When the corporations tested on the humans with THEIR science fair projects, now they have to realize that THEY are now being tested on with God's science fair projects. Fuck you Hyperion eat a bag of dicks. (not you Vaughn, kisses, ur perfect. Also Athena if you're you know. Running Hyperion now. Wait also Gladstone even tho ur dead. Bby ILY. AND TIMTAMS how could I forget the cookie bar).

I'm like bringing myself to tears with how much I love this au so much I just *bigg sniff*. It makes me so happy, I love werewolves and vampires and merfolk and psychics and I can just smash it all together like I'm in 2nd grade with 3 cans of different colored play dough and just this once Mr. Celebirdy can't tell me I'M NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE ART.

Like Troy, I let him inherit the psychic-ness from his dad. So he's like a godtier psychic because it's hysterical and that's it that's my reasoning for every single thing in this au. Meanwhile hiromis over here like 'uh, something bad MIGHT happen in 30 seconds. Wait and find out like the rest of us. Loser." I mean I guess Troy would also do that but not because. He literally doesn't know, just because he is kinda an asshole and would do that. Like can we all agree Typhon randomly being able to find Vaults is Hella sus. Like the fact he was shidding in Jakobs manor and then just got up and walked towards where the Vault would be??? Like. Ya Boi is psychic. Only logical explanation here shut up its the only. Logical explanation I am not taking any other answers.

Hammerlock is a werewolf? Yes because a posh hunter gentleman turning into a big pubby who loves hunting with a hat on is hysterical to me. Double for Aurelia who is EVEN MORE posh and ITS TOTALLY UNBECOMING OF A WOMAN AS RICH AS ME, DARLING. But awoo. What if Aurelia is just the tiny pubby. Like Hammerlock is a big fuckin majestic as hell wolf and Aurelia is like. Tiny fluff ball. Oh my god. Yes. Also Wainwright with his werewolf boyfriend husband because the echo memes are too good.

And zer0 is a dullahan because imagine the fucking hype behind Zer0 FINALLY taking their helmet off for the first time. Everyone is like :D Omg. And it's happening and it's happening and THERE'S LITERALLY NOTHING THERE. Also the fact that Zane 1. Knows Zer0 from past bar experiences and 2. Has had some of his best nights start with just a head. Well it's the perfect recipe for them meeting. Just imagine the chaos that would happen in that single bar.

Also Ember is another merperson because I think that would make the line "marry me. I mean, uh, yes," extremely funny with that context because when else are you gonna find another merperson that escaped the forced psychological chains of Junpai-7. Also she likes fire!!!! It's perfection. She's perfection. I mean what? Huh?

Also I really like Tannis so of course she has a huge part in this AU (hello Megan) as the Lewis-esque character. Tho I might have plans for her in the future :) because Tannis best girl and I would die for her.

[callmearcturus]

Borderlands Fic Is Good

I’m back into Borderlands, my comfort fandom, and my god it is full of amazing writing. Here’s just some that I’ve been rerereading in the past few months.

Everybody Works, by Wheat From Chaff

Rhys/Timothy, Modern/Seven Minutes In The Future AU, loooong slow burn at like 250F in the oven for 20 hours. In which Rhys is the CEO of Atlas, born from money and groomed for greatness, and Timothy is the less-famous Lawrence twin who works as Rhys’ bodyguard and everythingman.

It’s hard to explain why this fic is so incredible, because it’s a lot of stuff. Maybe the sheer amount of plate-spinning it does is what’s the most agonizingly impressive feat. Rhys is impeccably characterized, with a lot of bite while still juuuust barely avoiding being a true bastard. Timothy is.... honestly such a fully complete character that I’m kind of angry about how perfectly telegraphed he is.

This fic manages domestic bullshit, wacky dating hijinks, intense family drama, heart-stopping confrontations, and around a plot that never manages to meander around. It’s an exceptional story. Read it even if you don’t know what the fuck a borderlands is.

More from Wheat From Chaff:

How They Met Themselves, Rhys/Timothy. Original Flavor AU, essentially a continuation of canon. Rhys is the CEO of Atlas, and chasing after old projects lost in the ruins of old facilities. Timothy is a Vault Hunter who wears a blank mask over his face and just wants to get paid. This is almost as meaty a story as Everybody Works but reading it is something like a bruise. Extremely good story, but be ready to have your heart put through a ringer. Secretly the best part of this fic is the Digi-Jacks, Thing One and Thing Two, who for Plot Reasons are characters in their own right.

Titanomachia, Rhys/Timtam again. Greek mythology AU that manages to take a totally different angle than I’ve ever seen before. Rhys is the god of romance and unions, and is bid by the Queen of the Gods to find happy connections for Titan outsiders Jack and Timothy. The story unfolds both in a really fresh fun way, while also sticking to the sort of immutable rules of myth in a way I adore.

North Child Espresso and Cocktail Bar, Rhys/Timtam. A much smaller story than the previous, but lovely and fun and flirtatious. Tim meets Rhys when Rhys is on a phenomenally shitty date with a total jerk (Vasquez), and Rhys tries to salvage his evening by getting Tim’s number. It’s relentlessly charming.

tomorrow is not promised (but tonight is on the table), by thirtysixsavefiles

Rhys/Handsome Jack, Atlas CEO AU, Soulmate AU. The first word your soulmate says to you is writ on your body somewhere.

36SF is one of the most prolific writers in the BL fandom and I have loved their work for a long time but this one might be their best work. That’s a considerable claim, given their catalog. But there is something about seeing how Rhys and Jack drive each other mad that is so exquisite. The dynamic is absolutely electric, and the way they’re drawn together makes shit like destiny seem real.

I have a lot of favorite things about this one, but the most favorite might be the way Rhys keeps trying to reach out and hold Jack off him only to accidentally grab him and yank him in. It’s brilliant. Oh, and the final declaration right before the end. Now that is some goddamn romance.

More from thirtysixsavefiles:

Counting Stars, Rhys/Jack, modern AU. A marriage of convenience that goes absolutely splendid places. This one is whip bright and fun and has a great emotional backbone.

The RSVP Series, Rhys/Jack, modern AU. Remember that Craiglist ad of the guy offering to be your Terrible Date for Thanksgiving? Vaughn forwards it to Rhys, who calls on a whim, and so meets Jack. So begins-- not an epic romance, actually. A very methodical tender perfectly paced romance. NOTE: I heavily rec consuming this fic through the podfic by argentumlupine.

Complicated (Like You), Rhys/Jack, Atlas CEO AU. A very short piece but with fantastic voices. I love UST-fueled contentious relationships okay and Jack vs Rhys is my fave ever.

take me as I am, by sealdog

A Shakespearean-level comedy of errors starring Rhys, Jack, and Timothy. Look. You might not know this, but there is canonically a Hyperion Pleasure Palace where you can rent time with one of Handsome Jack’s dopplegangers. That’s canon. Anyway, uh.... listen. This is hysterical and I don’t really want to ruin it? Please just read this. It’s equal parts hot and fucking hilarious because everyone in this bar is an idiot.

Yeah I really am gonna leave it there. It’s funny. Read it.

More from sealdog:

Quid Pro Quo, Jack/Rhys. In which Rhys is a new intern at Hyperion, who goes out drinking to celebrate surviving his first week, and winds up getting picked up by Handsome Jack, and then they fail to fuck because Rhys is too drunk, and then Fiona who runs a lot of businesses but more presciently a tutoring agency asks Rhys to go tutor a new client, and it’s Angel, and that’s all just chapter one.  I dig the hell out of this one. NOTE: I super mega awesome hyper rec the podfic version by (again! yay!) argentumlupine.

open like the best endings, Jack/Rhys. Read the warnings, read the warnings, read the warnings, but like. This is hardcore hurt/comfort, but it’s like. A story like this, I find it deeply deeply cathartic, not unlike draining a poison from the blood.

you have to be (all mine), Jack/Rhys, unrequited Rhys/Vasquez. HOOOOLY SHIT, I devoured this fic. This is a bowstring of tension from the start to end. The idea is Vasquez runs into Rhys, who is in an established relations with Jack, and decides he’d be better for Rhys. This is almost a horror story. There are sections written from Vasquez’s POV that had me climbing the walls, I was fucking dying. Expertly fucking done, and a wild ride from start to finish.

you have to be (all mine) was also written by scootsaboot. So it only seems right to move onto them next!

come a little closer, by scootsaboot

Timothy/Rhys, modern AU, roadtrip fic. Timothy is attending his grandmother’s funeral. On his way back, driving across the country, he runs into a hitchhiker, Rhys. They travel back together.

This is like some kind of masterpiece of pacing. I really adore the amount of time it takes. It’s a fic with room to breathe, and its a romance that stretches its arms out. I adore it.

Also its a big bang fic with absolutely gorgeous art that just pumps up the emotional moments to a beautiful zenith. I sometimes go back to reread the pool scene on its own just ‘cause.

More from scootsaboot:

opia, Tim/Rhys. WEREWOLF AU. Really good werewolf AU. Y’alllllll I kind of hate werewolves on principle, but this is amazing shit. Rhys lives alone in his family home, and on his way to work he finds a werewolf injured on his porch. This fic is a perfectly sized romance novella with a perfect arc and escalation of UST and resolution. Also Rhys is a witch and I’m SOLD BABY, I’M SOLD.

Take Me Home, Rhys/Jack. ABO fic. Rhys calls an agency to get him an alpha for his heat. It’s great. It’s just great.

of stars and other precious things, by lasciel/ledgem

Rhys/Jack, with a tremendous guest star in Nisha. Similar to canon setting, in which Jack and Nisha are Vault Hunters, and Rhys is a very pretty reporter/documentarian who is funding their latest Vault search in return for footage.

This is like top three favorite fics in the entire fandom. It takes a lot of familiar elements of the canon and reworks them into a really strong, compelling tale of adventure and mystery and UST. You could take this story and use it as a script for a Hollywood blockbuster. It’s extremely cinematic in structure.

Firmware Update, by Vector

FUCK ME THIS IS HILARIOUS. It’s Rhys/Fiona kind of? But not remotely romantic. Basically, TFTBL Ep 2 hints that Rhys has a cyborg dick. Sometimes your dick needs a firmware upgrade. Sometimes you have to enlist a trusted friend to help you shove a USB in your dick.  Listen. It’s hilarious.

Safe as anywhere, by queerly_it_is

Rhys/Vaughn, College AU. Rhys is a bartender. Vaughn is a student who somehow tricked himself into thinking Rhys is cool. Rhys is not cool, but the two of them are very sweet as they pine after each other like a pair of dumdums. VERY strong supporting cast of Fiona, Sasha, and a pitch-perfect August. Has a podfic by Pod Person!

[minarawr]

1, 19, 21, 25 for the non US asks ☺️

I’m going to do this for two countries, seeing as how I was brought up in one, and live [and was born] in the one I currently live in.

1. favourite place in your country?

UK - I don’t really have a favourite, but, the place I’d go back to would be Newcastle, as that’s where my adoptive sister/best friend lives [and where I used to live]

AUS - I loved Sydney. It was such an amazing place to be.

19. do you like your country’s flag and/or emblem? what about the national anthem?

UK - I mean, the flag is pretty standard, a red cross on a white background. The emblem is a rose, and I’m not a fan of roses. The national anthem, I have actually never heard in full [or much of at all] so I have no opinion on it, haha.

AUS - The Australian flag is.. interesting to say the least. Each state also has it’s own flag. [WA, Black Swan boi] The national anthem was a pain in my backside and I hated singing it every wednesday at assembly for the best part of 13 years, but it’s a relatively nice one, I guess.

21. if you could send two things from your country into space, what would they be?

UK - Yorkshire Pudding, and… Irn Bru. [I know Irn Bru is Scottish, but give me a break!]

AUS - TimTams. Plus something else, IDK. Maybe… Mrs Macs Beef, Cheese and Bacon Pie. Fuck me, I miss those.

[Can you tell I’m hungry?]

25. would you like to come from another place, be born in another country?

I’ve always wanted to be from a Scandinavian region country, as long as I can remember. Or, Romania, because Dracula. [I had/have an obsession.]

Thank you, lovely. 💕

[luvleekaotix-imagines]

So my brother and his wife just came back from a trip to Australia and they brought me back chocolate mint and white chocolate flavored TimTams, which is surprising to me because where I live, I've only seen the original flavored TimTams. Now, I was just wondering, is there a TimTam flavor that you like?

Hmmm.... I think after the original TimTams, I really like the caramel ones. But that’s because I like caramel flavour in general. The thing is, they’re like super sweet, so I can never have many. Originals are the best. 

There’s also double coated chocolate ones, they’re nice cause they’re like original TimTams, but with a thicker chocolate coating on the outside. I think I had black forest flavoured ones? Like chocolate with cherry flavour. There was a pina colada one, which was pineapple and coconut. Lychee was okay. Red velvet is yummy! 

There’s so many flavours, I’m sure I’ve missed out on a lot of them, but I try them when I can ahaha!

ALSO have you eaten them all? Cause if not, bite the opposite corners of the TimTam (like top left and bottom right / top right and bottom left), dip the bottom half into milk and the suck on the top bitten corner and use the TimTam as a straw. It’S FUCKING DELICIOUS. The TimTam crumbles real quick though, so have a spoon handy!

I’m so glad your brother and wife got you TimTams as a gift, cause they are so amazing hahaha

[restoringbalance8-blog]

Hormones. Part One.

Many of my high school years were mislead by a particular YouTuber called FreeLee the Banana Girl. Her mantra, basically, was that fat makes you fat because it is ‘fat’, and that we should all #carbthefuckup in order to lose weight. 90-95% carbs, and 5-10% fat/protein. She also said that when you're on a high carb vegan diet that you could eat as many calories you want and stay trim. 

Her toned physique caused many people to believe her theory was true. However, what she did not point out was that she was cycling almost all day and every day, and this is probably why she could eat as many carbs and calories as she wanted without gaining weight. The reality is that many people who don’t earn a living off YouTube (AKA 99.99999% of us) have sedentary lifestyles: sitting at school/university, at work, or at home. So, when I tried this carbthefuckup diet in year 11, I was hungry all the time (carbs-personally- do NOT fill me up), went to the bathroom like crazy, and I put on a lot of weight (just to the point of chubby).

When I finally realised this diet was unrealistic, I started to incorporate more fats and protein (tofu, nut butters, olive oil, beans, etc.) and I dropped the weight easily. It has taken me since year 11 (so, like 3 years) to realise that fats will NOT make you fat. It is misleading because ‘fats’and ‘fat’ share the same word. Most of us still believe that low-fat yoghurts and low-fat milks and low-fat potato chips are healthier than full fat, but this is not the case!

Here are some statistics. Since 1990, we have increased out intake of carbohydrates by 40% Since 1990, obesity has increased by 30%

Furthermore, there has been a four-fold increase in financial claims to do with psychiatric health issues since 1991. 

This is why statistics at school was important, guys. Do these statistics exhibit causation or correlation? Has the western world’s increase in carbohydrates caused an increase in obesity? Has the increase in carbohydrates (especially refined), contributed to the significant rise in mental illness? I ask you to challenge every fact I present to you in this blog post and think critically about the information you take on board. I will go into the science that made me understand and believe why fats do not make you fat, but sugar does. But, please do your own research and form your own beliefs. Yes, science is meant to be true, but it does not become REAL until you make it your own. 

The low-fat diet was really popular in the 1990s and 2000s, but is becoming less and less popular as things like avocado and nut butters have become trendy health foods. 

And, people (including me!) are now starting to realise that SUGAR is the devil, not FAT. 

I only read the following fact last week, and it has shaken me and kind of bothered me. 

40% of weight gain or loss is to do with calories. 

The rest is dependent on hormones. 

Sugar releases a hormone called insulin.

Insulin tells the brain to store energy (from calories) as fat.

Refined sugar and refined grains like cornflakes have very high glycemic indices (GI) which mean that the spike in blood sugar and insulin is very high. Fun fact... actually not that fun because cornflakes are yum... but cornflakes have a higher GI than white sugar. This means you’re better off eating a bowl of white sugar than cornflakes for breakfast :oooooo

Fat, as far as my research has shown, does not release insulin. Sure, if you eat way too many calories in nuts and avocado you will put on weight. But, if you eat blood-spiking sugar (see picture below), the brain will respond by telling your body to store the calories from both the food you have just eaten. This is why Timtams, are known as a “fat bomb”- the refined sugar spikes blood sugar causing the release of insulin, which then tells the brain to store both the calories from the sugar AND the fat from the TimTam. 

Now, please don’t let this scare you from eating carbohydrates. Don’t even let this scare you from combining fats with sugars. In fact, eating healthy fats and proteins with carbohydrates helps regulate the blood sugar spike, meaning less insulin and less fat storage. 

There are many good and very healthy carbohydrates that you should definitely eat! Especially before and after a workout or tiring day or whenever you feel like them! Some of these include:

Cold potatoes (by cooling, the potato membrane structure changes so that it doesn’t metabolise as glucose.... or something like that- I can’t really remember. All I know that cold potatoes are better than hot, so don’t fear from that cold potato salad xo) Kumara & Pumpkin and virtually any vegetable you can possibly think of Fruit- berries, apples, grapefruit, and some more all have low Glycemic Indices. But still eat that banana because bananas are yum and they have good fibre, iron and potassium. AND they’re a million times better than a caramel slice! Oats Legumes-chickpeas, lentils, etc. Brown rice (or basmati rice as a healthier white rice option). But best to eat normal white rice in MODERATION as it has a relatively high GI.

There are plenty more! But do your research and eat what feels best for you. If you are hungry 10 minutes after eating that slice of bread, then it probably spiked your blood sugar and left you feeling hungry, etc, etc. If you feel amazing and content after eating that banana, then fucking eat it! Everyone is different and has different DNA codes so it’s impossible to make a one-rule for all. Just think about how different the colours are of a black person and white person! The same internally! Bananas may love one person’s body, and not love another person’s body as much. So, pretty much, just eat what makes YOU feel good. Even though this new information has really bothered me and made me really nervous about what I’m eating and what kind of GI it has, I think at the end of the day, as long as you eat more veggies in your diet, then you’re doing amazing. There is really nothing wrong with veggies. And soak em up in some coconut cream and curry powder! Yummmm.

The main thing we should all stay away from as much as possible is refined sugar and refined grains (I’m looking at YOU Midnight Cake... with your devilish white flour and sugar...grr) Once in a while is fine, but definitely consume that tomato sauce (soooo high in sugar omg) you’re having with your kumara fries less, or that fizzy drink you’re having with your curry. 

Actually, there is a new tomato sauce by Real Foods that has no refined sugar and sweetened naturally. I am yet to buy it, but I believe it is sold at most New World’s.

Anyway, I hope this post was informative. It is in no way meant to scare you, but I personally believe knowledge is power, and the more power and control we have over our own bodies and mental health then the better our lives shall be. Knowing why our body feels a certain way after eating something, will hopefully help us lead healthier lives.

I haven’t really touched on the mental health side of things and how sugar and refined carbs could affect your wellbeing but that is another long post in itself. And I need to get some sleep soon.

My next post on hormones will be related to female hormones and how we should nourish and look after our finely tuned bodies. This is still a fairly new topic for me, but let's just say that I am currently trialling a new exercise regime. I’m like my own science experiment. Lol. I’m so nerdy. 

Thanks for reading and go hard on that coconut yoghurt and those brazil nuts!!

Much love

K

[timaltman]

rules: once you have been tagged you are supposed to write 92 truths about yourself. at the end, choose however many people you want to tag!

tagged by: @hsinlvegas who has gotten me addicted to pinterest aesthetic boards and i’m mad at her for it but she’s still p rad. 

tagging: whoever wants to do it lmao idk it’s 2:30am here idek whats up or down rn i should probably be asleep but also like.... no.

LAST… [1] drink: water (i’m so exciting /sarcasm) [2] phone call: my mom called me while she was driving home from work  [3] text message: “oh my god no. not the kidz bop. pls no” - to my sister [4] song you listened to: reaching by audiomachine (which is so good pls go listen to it) [5] time you cried: last night thinking about steve irwin and how i owe him my entire life and career bc in 2 weeks i’m starting my first official zookeeping job and he was a huge inspiration for me as a kid 

-REST UNDER THE CUT-

HAVE YOU EVER…

[6] dated someone twice: no [7] been cheated on: no [8] kissed someone and regretted it: no [9] lost someone special: yes [10] been depressed: ☜(ﾟヮﾟ☜) all the fuckin time my dudes [11] gotten drunk and thrown up: no but i’ve gotten so anxious i’ve thrown up??

LIST 3 FAVOURITE COLOURS: [12] teal [13] pale yellow [14] silver

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU… [15] made new friends: yes! [16] fallen out of love: no [17] laughed until you cried: yes [18] found out someone was talking about you: yeah i mean i’m sure there are like three people who bitch about me all the time lmao [19] met someone who changed you: yes~ (in a good way)  [20] found out who your true friends are: (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:・ﾟ✧ -bitter fucking laughter-  [21] kissed someone on your facebook list: ye - my wonderful girlfriend~

GENERAL… [22] how many of your tumblr friends do you know in real life: i mean, i’ve met a lot of them after becoming friends on tumblr, but then i have some old high school friends and some internship friends on here, too.... so like 10 or so? probably a few more than that. [23] do you have any pets: my asshole cat, robin: the cat wonder, lives with me in my apartment. at home i have a beagle/terrier mutt named copper and a gray tabby named dusty. i’m hoping to maybe get a ball python this summer but i’m not sure yet! [24] do you want to change your name: yeah, i’ve considered it b/c trans but i’m not entirely sure what i want yet.... [25] what did you do for your last birthday: wielded a chainsaw, ate shitty walmart cake and watched step brothers with some classmates in a remote cabin in southern illinois? not my first choice but not terrible, all things considered. didn’t lose any limbs that day so i can’t complain. [26] what time did you wake up: robin woke me up at like, 5:30am to get fed, but then i went back to sleep again until 7:30, text billy to have a good day at work, and then i went back to sleep again until 9:45 b/c i didn’t have my 9am class today hell yeah [27] what were you doing at midnight last night: uh, pinterest-ing for my character aesthetic boards.... >_> [28] name something you cannot wait for: graduating college and being the fuck done with schoooooool. also mother fuckin wonDER WOMAN. [29] when was the last time you saw your mother: april 23rd [30] what is one thing you wish you could change about your life: how far away all the ppl i care about are :(((( [31] what are you listening to right now: more audiomachine but i was watching friends in the background earlier [32] have you ever talked to a person named tom: ye my old neighbor was named tom he was real nice [33] something that is getting on your nerves: not in the angry way but in the anxious way- i have to give a presentation on my research project to the college board in like... 6 hours. [35] elementary: yes? [36] high school: done [37] college: sO CLOSE TO DONE I LITERALLY HAVE TWO CLASSES LEFT [38] hair color: brown.... it used to have a white patch and be fun, but i dyed it for superboy and now i’m battling with myself debating if i should dye it back bc “””professional””” for jobs but that’s so boring i want to look like shiro again :((( [39] long or short hair: short god please short, regardless of what gender i present, short is so much nicer since my hair is so thiiiiick [40] do you have a crush on someone: ye my a m a z i n g girlfriend uwu  [41] what do you like about yourself?: noncommittal shrug emoji? i like my eye color i think that’s pretty radical since it’s like a gray-teal color. i guess i’m a pretty good resource for random ass animal facts too [42] piercings: mmmm i mean, i don’t care for them or about them that much? [43] blood type: literally no idea which is probably bad [44] nickname: sunshine, sam, sammy, teddy, timmy, timtam, dad [45] relationship status: -heart eyes emojis @ billy- [46] zodiac sign: aries i think? idk all i care is my celtic zodiac is a fox, so [47] pronouns: he/him [48] fav tv show: f ri ck en brooklyn 99 [49] tattoos: not yet, but after i get top surgery and no longer run the disk of mutilating or stretching it, i wanna get tim’s robin symbol on my chest [50] right or left handed: left!

FIRST… [51] surgery: wisdom teeth were my first surgery, i think? [52] piercing: got my earlobes pierced when i was like, 12? idk i don’t wear them anymore so they’ve all but closed up [53] best friend: this girl on the playground in preschool named asya but after her was this girl named natalie that i was friends with from kindergarten all through junior high. she just got married like, a month ago and i feel old [54] sport: like to actually continue with was soccer - i started at 6 i think [55] vacation: that i remember? disney world b/c my dad had drill down in florida so my parents dragged my sister and i with bc we didn’t have to pay for the hotel lol [56] pair of trainers: wut

RIGHT NOW… [57] eating: nothin [58] drinking: water [59] i’m about to: sleep maybe, hopefully?  [60] listening to: still audiomachine since they just asked this question like 10 questions ago..... [61] waiting for: my anxiety to calm tf down so i can go to sleep [62] want: foooood. i ate dinner really early (5pm) and now it’s 10 hours later so i want food again. [63] get married: -super noncommittal and also confused, disgruntled noises- ?? [64] career: dream career is a zookeeper, honestly. it’s what i’m doing, i’ve worked really hard to get to the place where i am, and i’m happy with it

WHICH IS BETTER… [65] hugs or kisses: hugs [66] lips or eyes: eyes [67] shorter or taller: no preference [68] older or younger: usually i get along better with ppl older than me- all my closest friends are older by 2 years or more except like..... amy [69] romantic or spontaneous: anxiety and spontaneity don’t mix lmao [70] nice arms or nice stomach: either or both or neither is fine idrc [71] sensitive or loud: sensitive [72] hook up or relationship: relationship [73] troublemaker or hesitant: hesitant only bc troublemaker makes me anxious lmao

HAVE YOU EVER… [74] kissed a stranger? nope [75] drank hard liquor? ye i’ve had like. one whole vodka and lemonade in my entire life because i am a raging party animal /sarcasm [76] lost glasses/contact lenses? i lose my contacts in my eyeball sometimes [77] turned someone down? ye kinda. my ~best friends~ have this bad habit of ~falling in love with me~ and then getting pissed when i don’t return the feeling and treating me like crap :))))  [78] sex on first date? nope [79] broken someone’s heart? sure maybe idk. not on purpose. [80] had your own heart broken? no [81] been arrested? nope [82] cried when someone died? i’m a monster and have no feelings so no, not really. i usually go into emotional shock and stop processing everything [83] fallen for a friend: kind of

DO YOU BELIEVE IN… [84] yourself? noooope [85] miracles? listen on friday i catered an event and the idiot who packed it up for us on their shift the day before forgot to put matches in the gathering. and the truck drivers loaded it onto the truck before i could check that everything was there. so we got to the location and couldn’t light the sternos for the hot food but somehow we found a box of matches in the kitchenette we were serving out of so yes i believe in miracles [86] love at first sight? maybe? idk not really i really don’t understand how anyone could love someone without knowing a bunch about them first [87] santa claus? billY AND I SAW SANTA ON OUR WAY UP TO C2E2 ON SUNDAY OKAY HIS CAR WAS RED AND SAID “MY OTHER RIDE IS A SLEIGH” AND HIS LICENSE PLATE SAID KRINGLE AND HE HAD A BIG WHITE BEARD IT WAS AMAZING OKAY. [88] kiss on the first date? maybe for ppl who aren’t like. super anxious about everything all the time [89] angels? no

OTHER… [90] current best friend’s name: marble, emma [91] eye color: teal-gray, which sounds pretentious and White Person af but like..... that’s the best way to describe them [92] favorite movie: i don’t knowwww that’s a hard one ;_; 

[ijamethings]

Pokemon Sun and Moon Nuzlocke Summary

Rules: Standard Nuzlocke -1 Pokemon per area on the map (indicated by yellow lines) -If first pokemon in an area is the same as another skip and catch next one -Always nickname -Always catch shinies (can’t use them unless first in the area) -Can’t buy items (cosmetics are okay though!) -Island scan is okay for 1 pokemon as long as it’s the first pokemon on the route Chose Rowlet - named Crumpet Caught Pikapek - named Kilimanjaro (If looks could kill) Caught Ratatta - named Chimmy Caught Meowth - named Maximillion (Yugi boy) Caught Drowzee - named Lord Pants (Cause pants) Caught Grimer - named Tracer (idk rainbows?) Caught Cyndaquil - named Killetheth (MY BOY) Caught Spearow - named Macho (knew exactly what to do with this one) Traded Spearow for a machop named Macho  (I HAD LIKE 50 BIRDS I NEEDED SOMETHING TO BEAT ROCK TYPES) Caught Oricorio - Named Pvt. Dancer (YES ANOTHER FUCKING BIRD) 2nd Island I needed Macho to take one for the team- I... did not care for his death. Wasn’t paying attention, and the first pokemon on the route killed Maximillion- caught it. It was a Grubbin (forgot bug > dark) it was so sudden- I was sad. At least I didn’t get to see his face blow up.

I named the grubbin KILLERBEE.

I caught a poliwag and named it Waggirl as per my sister’s instruction.

A trainer with a miltank showed up and plowed through my pokemon, my man, Crumpet was murdered by it. I’ll... miss him.

Got Eevee egg - Yes I tactically used repels here so I could count Eevee as that area’s first pokemon. Shut up. It hatched and I named it Sandwiches. Caught Fletchling - named it Scrambledegg... it died like two minutes later when I tried to give it EXP and it got pursuited on.

Lord Pants being a boss and destroying everything surprisingly. The fire trial was intense but somehow made it through, except for Pvt. Dancer who danced their last dance for a chance at us living through that, and Killerbee who atoned for their sins as a majestic charjabug.

Used pokepelago to evolve Sandwiches into a Sylveon- the lady killer. Special defensive tank for my team! (And also fucking adorable)

Caught Whimpod- Named it Oogami after the best girl in Dangan Ronpa 1. Killetheth wrecked the grass trial. Desperately needed ground type- got a zubat in Diglett’s tunnel. (Seriously?) Named Slavoj Zizek as per @steampunkjesus​ request. Caught Lillipup - Named it JT and immediately traded it for a bouncee - not because I particularly wanted a bouncee but because it was holding shiny powder lol. I’m not using Bouncee. Into the box you go. Afterward everything went pretty smoothly: The current team being - Oogami, Kilimanjaro, Killetheth, Sandwiches, Lord Pants, Slavoj Zizek 3rd Island We caught a slowpoke - named it Potato- as per norm- and quickly added it to team. Lord Pants was not needed anymore. Electric trial wrecked me. No rock type or ground types at all- Up to Killetheth to Zmove his way through it... but Vikavolt totem has a fire-reducing berry and took the shot- quickly retaliating and absolutely destroying Killetheth- 1 level before Typhlosion- :(

Caught Skarmory - named it- It’sOver isn’t it? Isn’t it? Isn’t it over? 

I also forgot that everybody in Alola has dark type moves and that’s probably not good for Potato, as a random trainer’s Sharpedo crunched on my Potato and he died too :(( Lord Pants tagged back in. Everything went fine, caught a Snowrunt named it Iced Coffee

At Po town it was raining, I managed to catch a goomy! Named it Tim Tammy- because holy shit Timtam slams are amazing.

Hapu decided playtime was over and her Mudsdale split my team apart, Lord Pants was the first to go down, apparently grass knot wasn’t enough to take it down, so Sandwiches came out next and skill swapped it’s OP stamina away, before getting earthquaked to death. Oogami came back and took revenge for them, but it was too late, Lord Pants and Sandwiches died fighting valiantly. My team was p. shabby at this point. Oogami, Slavoj, Kilimanjaro, TimTammy, It’sOver, ???? 4th Island Got a free Aerodactyl on a boat! Named it FreeBoat added to team. Caught Shiinotic, named Portabella. Portabella wrecked the dragon trial, which was awesome.

Portabella died to Gladion’s Silvally which was way less awesome. Needed another grass type pokemon for the rock elite four... I was forced to use... Bouncee. gdi. Bouncee got mad at my fashion. Ugh. Final team for elite four: Oogami - the crutch of the team, been soaking up experience for awhile, but was utterly weak against 3/4 elite four. Still strong enough to tank a LOT, however. Timtammy- Unknown potential, just turned into Goodra and was going to have to take the place of the Special Defense tank that Sandwiches left behind. Slavoj Zizek - Glass Cannon, I needed to be careful, with Scope lens and high crit rate moves and full friendship, she crits every time, but low defense and no health makes her an easy kill. FreeBoat- Good typing, weird potential, maybe FreeBoat can stick it out? Kilimanjaro - Sleep hitter of the team, quietly lurking, always there. Knows a fire move for some reason? Still knows a fighting move? What the fuck are Toucannons even? Bouncee- Ugh. High Jump Kick + Wide Lens = 99% hit rate high jump kick. Even though it’s 99% I just know that 1% is gonna fuck me over at some point. Careful planning- Oogami tanked through the fighting one beat him easily Skipped the rock one for now... Ghost elite four was weird and required some switching, but no harm done. Flying leader was intense and scary, but at low health, FreeBoat managed to sweep, and her crobat was just as fast as Slavoj, but was 13 levels behind him?! (Like seriously wtf?) Rock was really scary. Relicanth was easy, but that Golem was hurting us like crazy (most of the team was weak to electric.) But no one was harmed. Final fight with Kukui himself! Bouncee kicked his dog in the face! Braviary got z moved on by Timtammy ice bem! FreeBoat fought his Incineroar taking it down low and it got full restored... and I had not a lot of other options so... Free Boat had to take the hit for the team... FreeBoat being the first casualty of the elite four... Oogami took him down with revenge! Magnezone was scary, but Bouncee has surprisngly powerful legs that took it down. Ninetails I thought would be scary, but Slavoj one shotted it with a signature Cross Poison. Finally- Snorlax. Watch it get karate chopped by a toucan. Amazing game to Nuzlocke by the way guys, it was really fun! Final fight with Tapu Koko ended abruptly. Expected it to be a big fight, but forgot emergency exit actually runs away from wild battles, LOL. Lillie has different dialogue if you run too! Which is interesting.