#and Bery loves that too <3

[xsammei-her-belovedberyl]

Yesterday I was talking with Beryl while we cuddle with each other ♥︎

I told him that I had a surprise, I ordered a led light with our names on it together and the date of our anniversary ♡

Beryl told me that my ideas are so incredible , he loved the idea and he said excitedly : “I can't wait to see the light in our room and to see the date of our anniversary and our names together glow brightly on the light at night ♡🌙✨.”

[k2ntoss]

OMG MARA

Soft, lazy kisses and innocent touches that turn bolder and more sinful as you just can’t resist each other.

“This is wrong.” “So wrong.” While continuing to pull at each others clothes, mind fogged with nothing but lust and arousal.

THIS TWO WITH JASONNN PLEASEEE

girl, allow me to fangirl over this because YOU are here on my asks i feel so *screams* okay okay okay !!!! let me get at it, i just love how your mind works so here we go :3 bestfriends shit with jay

soft, lazy kisses and innocent touches that turn bolder and more sinful as you just can't resist each other + "this is wrong." "so wrong." while continuing to pull at each others clothes, mind fogged with nothing but lust and arousal

it was meant to be a lecture afternoon on his place, jason offered to help you prepare yourself for a literature test and it was like it at first but it was easy to get distracted when any other thing to talk about popped into your head and jason couldn't help it but to listen to you and then go on a long ramble with you.

right now he leans back into the couch, letting you lay your head on his chest as you go on rambling about thay last episode you watched of your favorite show, he listens to you with patience and he is bery much aware of the books that lay now untouched on your coffee table.

"so you know how that's just a metaphor to let us know that hannibal is actually in love with will? i mean, why would you compare yourself and your patient to achilles and patroclus if you weren't in love with him?" you ask him and jason looks like he thinks about it before nodding.

"i can see your point, but i haven't seen the show to know a little more about their interactions" he replies with a subtle shrug as his hand goes to softly play with your hair as he presses his chin on top of your head "but i do know that achilles and patroclus weren't just friends, that's pure bullshit"

and that makes you laugh, the way he always speaks his mind and how smart jason always sounds when it comes to literature and art never fails to amaze you. he looks down at you at the same time you look up at him at you can feel his heart beat a little faster at how close your faces are. you both like each other and you both know it, the subtle hand touching when you walk by his side that makes him smirk proudly when you blush or the lingering kisses on your forehead and cheeks are just too clear, the way you enjoy it too much when jason holds you and how you always find an excuse to nuzzle into his side makes him aware.

so why would he miss the chance to taste those pretty lips of yours? jason leans in to press his lips on yours, soft and sweet as his hands cup your cheeks, your own finding their way to covers his and it's all so cute because he pulls away with a small and shy smile "did you know you're just too cute when you ramble about the things you like?" jason says softly, his lips brushing against your before he kisses you again, one of his hand now down on your neck to bring you closer.

"i didn't knew, but have i told you already how good you look when you speak about the things you know?" you reply in a cheeky tone, pulling away as your hand goes down to hold onto his wrist before kissing his lips too, leaning into his body just so you could both lazily lay there on the couch and keep on kissing each other. soon enough the hand that was still cupping your cheek finds your waist and yours is now pressed against his chest, the kiss grows a little deeper when jason's tongue touches softly your bottom lip before making its way between your parted lips, breath growing a bit heavier.

you are fighting yourself to keep quiet, it was just jason and you on the living room but his roomate was on his own room too, you knew roy well enough to know he was like jay's brother and you knew thst maybe, just maybe you both didn't wanted to be found kissing almost on top of each other as your hands roammed over your bodies.

jason grunts against your mouth when your hand tugs at his shirt and be bites your lip playfully, pulling again without letting go off it just yet and with his eyes fixed on yours as he smirks at you, one of his hands starting to slide under your shirt making you feel his fingertips warm against your stomach.

there isn't a word worth saying when he lets go of your lip because as soon as he does you're back at kissing him, needier and hungrier as his tongue swirls into your mouth making him moan lowly when you suck on it, your fingers now caressing the nape of his neck before diving into his hair as his hand goes up your torso, teasingly touching the edge of your bra.

you took it as a sing, moving until you sat on his lap. jason held your hips with one of his arms around your body, his other hand now fully cupping one of your tits as the kiss got more heated, sloppy and aggressive. he was biting on your lips, letting your tongue wrestle with his and grunting when you first moved your hips against his pelvis.

"not here. roy could find us and i'm not really on the mood to let him see you like this" jason mumbles, forcing himself away from your lips as he sits on the couch, making you straddle him before standing up so he could carry you to his room. as he did he kissed your neck, smirking everytime a soft giggle came out of your lips as you tilted your head, fingers gripping his hair as he did bit your skin playfully.

"god jason, you're playing with me" you said in a whisper, the grin on your lips only fueled jason as he closed the door by kicking it and it made you moan the second he pushed your body against the wall that he shared with roy.

"am i now, princess?" he asks, whispering too and looking up at you as he was still holding you with your legs wrapped around his waist and as soon as you nod his hands travel from under your knees to your ass, giving you a playful squeeze before devouring your lips again.

jason feels your hands tugging his shirt from his back, starting to pull it up and he pushes you a little more so his hands can do the same with your shirt and it's messy because you can't seem to stop kissing and let out muffled moans and grunts into each other's mouth.

"this is wrong." jason chuckles as he pulls away from your lips, pupils blown wide as he manages to take off your shirt and his hands tremble a little when he unclasps your bra and lets it fall from your shoulder, moaning when he's able to see your bare breasts.

"so wrong." you agree with a sweet giggle, your hands pulling up his shirt and taking it off before tossing it away. it wasn't that you didn't felt anything for jason but there was this voice inside your heads that whispered about this maybe not working between you, but being honest there wasn't two people more meant to be than you.

knowing this by how well you got along, by how you completed each other was soothing because it meant the same for you. the lust and arousal also complemented by how you loved him and he loved you made every touch and kiss a hundred times more intense. it's easy to push that thought aside when he puts you down, his hands going down to unbutton your jeans as his lips glide down your neck, your hands also undoing jason's belt and unbuttoning his jeans before your touch wanders down to caress his half-hardened cock.

the low moan that leaves his mouth as he sucks a small mark on your shoulder makes you grin, he's now pulling your pants down and gripping at your hips with a smirk as you stroke him over his boxers and it turns him on so much it's not so long until you both manage to let all your clothes scattered over the floor of jason's room.

"you look so damn good like this," he mutters against your ear, his voice rumbles at how deep it turns when your hand moves up and down around his dick, his fingers tracing a path between your thighs until he finds your core and he grins widely when he feels your wetness "being so wet just for me."

the stroke he makes between your folds drags a moan out of your lips and he hushes you with a bruising kiss, thumb circling on your clit as your fingers trace his cock and one of your legs is wrapped again around his hips to give him easier access to your cunt.

"you have to be quiet, baby." he whispers against your lips as you rock your hips against his hand and he sounds already so dominant you only manage to nod, holding back a deep moan when his fingers collect your slick before he pushes two into your entrance, stretching you in a way that made you moan silently, lungs suddenly breathless by how he found your sweet spot with such an ease it got your legs weak.

"fuck jay," you whine lowly, trying to keep your voice as soft as you can because you want to be loud to at least muffle the sounds on his fingers inside your aching pussy "i need you inside of me, please..." you beg in a pleading whisper, eyes glazed as you move your hand to press his tip against your throbbing clit.

the need and lust on your voice and face makes him growl and he takes his fingers out of you, quickly replacing your hand with his. stroking himself he uses your slick and his precum to make sure he can slide into your warmth. it only takes him seconds until jason pulls you up again, wrapping your legs around his hips as he uses one of his hands to guide himself inside of you and he grunts as soon as your thight walls swallow his shaft.

"that's it... taking me so good," he says, letting you hear the smirk on his lips as he presses your back against the wall and gives a first slow thrust "it's like this pussy was made just for me, isn't it?"

and he sounds just so filthy you can't help but moan this time a little louder, jason chuckles at that as his hands hold onto your hips to start thursting into you a little faster and harder. your hands gripping onto his shoulders as your fingernails sink on his skin amd the way he looks at your parted lips makes him feel so proud of himself.

"i- i need you to ruin me, jay." you'd say when his fingers grip a little harder on your plushy hips "don't care if someone hears me, please make me scream your name." and the way you beg for him makes him feel even more powerful.

"want me to make you scream like a pretty whore, baby?" he asks with a deep thrust, his eyes dark with lust and need "i'm gonna ruin you so bad, you won't ever feel so good again in your life if it's not my cock inside of you, you'll be all mine."

you'd be lying if you said you wouldn't cum just with his words but it was a mix of everything. the filthy talking, the way he fucked you pressed against the wall while picking you up like a little toy and how he looked at you as if he needed to own you in every possible way; you just wanted to let him get his way with you, wanted him to ruin sex for you because you knew not other person was going to be able to bring this much pleasure to you.

jason kept going, his deep strokes making you cry and whine as you held onto him for dear life. head falling back as he kissed and marked your neck and tits, nibbling on your nipples as his thick cock kissed your cervix, bringing you to the edge and making him growl heavily when you clenched around him like a vice.

"you feel so fucking thight, princess, tell me how much you need to cum." he asks breathlessly as he slows his pace a little, kissing sloppier pecks on the side of your neck as he waits for your reply.

"so much, jay, need to cum so much." you beg in a whiny tone, your eyes fixed on his and he nods, kissing your lips soothingly because he knows you're overwhelmed and your climax tenses your body more and more with each thrust.

"c'mon, baby... cum all over this cock." he grunts, kissing your chin as he goes back to that fast and hard pace, pulling you down on him and moving your body as if it was nothing "cum and scream my name like the little slut you are,"

his voice and the way he moves inside of you is enough to make you moan loudly, crying his name out loud as your body jerks in an intense orgasm that makes your inner walls clench around him in a way that made it seem like your pussy was pushing him out, feeling that made him grunt heavily, emptying his load inside of you with a messy and deep thrust.

[luffyvace]

Heyooo :D

Robin's anon back (ngjfnjff this is so funny to type I hope you don't mind 😭😭), could I request Robin with a male s/o who always take care of the crew ? (He's either like a big bro or a father for some of them) For example : He always makes sure Zoro sleeps in a comfortable position whenever he suddenly takes a nap after training, he always brings to Nami new inks, maps, pens..., candies for Chopper (just like Robin hehehehe), food for Luffy... but in process he kinda neglects himself because he prioritizes the crew above all.

Thank you again for your kindness and I wish you an amazing day/night. ❤️😊

OH HIII ROBIN’S ANON!! i don’t mind you addressing yourself as that at all it’s how i remember you:) 😭!

AWW male s/o sounds so sweet! of course i’ll do this request!!

anytime anyday anon💗💗 you have a wonderful day/night as well <3

YIPPIE I LOVE THIS GIF OF ROBIN<3

ENJOY YOUR HEADCANONS LOVELY ANONYMOUS!!

sooo!

your so helpful!!

“SNACKS! oh gee thanks m/n!”

-luffy

”mmmm…huh? PUT ME DOWN?! oh..hmm…zzzz”

-zoro

”come in! oh m/n, what’s up? is that for me?! thanksss m/n!! your the best! i was running out of paper actually!!….just for the record i don’t owe you any beri for this you know..😗”

-nami

”ahh! m/n! actually i need your help with something…i had usopp to build this shelf for my books only to realize it’s too high..could you get that red one down and..maybe make it lower? hahah 😅”

-chopper

”ohhh! m/n! look! it’s my latest invention!! the only problem is..i’m missing a key piece…see here? it needs something to generate it! could you go back to the island and find something for me?? thanks a lot! i knew i could count on you!”

-usopp

”MMMM/NNNNNNN!!!! MOOOORE SNAAAAAAAAACKS!!”

-luffy..again

”m/n! i’m trying to cook dinner but luffy keeps pestering me! think you could wrestle luffy to go play outside or something?!”

-sanji

”oi! m/n just in time! i need you to go help me test out this SUUUUUUPERRRRR new upgrade i’m making to the sunny! go unfurl the sails!”

-franky

”WHAT IN THE WORLD?! THE LOG POSE IS FACE A COMPLETE 180!! WERE GOING THE WRONG WAY!”

”oh! whoops! i asked m/n to unfurl the sails so i could-“

💥💥 😓 😬 😡✊

(yes this sequence again)

”M/N FIX THIS NOW”

-nami

”m/n!! how very good to see you! i’ve come up with a new song! would you like to hear it? very well—i shall play!”

-brook

you ran to the library as soon as you could and flopped into one of the chairs

a hand touched your shoulder and you wanted to just completely melt away from how tired you were

and yet you were gonna have to help another person

nope!

just robin:)

i mean you didn’t mind helping but…today’s been a long day

robin sits next to you

you air your complaints and get a lot of much needed stress off your shoulders

she sprouts two hands from your back to massage your shoulders and it felt really good

she gives you advice to start saying ‘no’ a little more and that it’s okay to take some time for yourself

she scolds you only a bit when you do this but only because she cares

and especially because she loves you

💗

robin had a hand in the bathroom preparing you a hot bath while you vented to her

after you were done she told you about the shower

and boy it was a real steamy one

just what you needed

robin always knows just what to do when your exhausted

but would prefer if you’d simply solve the problem at hand

LOL

she lectures you about this and man does it drag on

oh well you’d much rather hear her soothing voice than overexert yourself

she recommends you things like meditation and reading

and maybe even to go to chopper about it

especially if things get physical like your back or arms hurt

zoros’ heavy ok?

spawns a bunch of arms to chop your back if that’s what you need

shes the best really

brings you drinks and honestly just caters to you until your feeling better

by then your ready for a hot meal and some sleep

which is exactly what happens thankfully

you two holds hands in your sleep and cuddle a little closer that night

SO SWEET 🥲

these were shorter than my norm

it’s ok bc quality over quantity right?? you can always request more i’m just sleepy rn 😋

also this was in a slightly different writing style than usual so i hope you like!! it’s not permanent tho

[pasta-in-the-pudding]

I absolutely love Toby and I’ve recently discovered your account and I ADORE the way you write him. That last post was fuckin amazing btw, if it’s not too big of a deal, may I please get some headcanons of Toby being clingy with a reader who’s equally as clingy/affectionate? Like cuddling and following eachother around wherever the other goes. Toby is just so AGHHSHDDH I LOVE HIM

Aww im so glad you liked my last post!

Thank you so much for requesting!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Clingy!Toby x Clingy!Reader

Toby had a rough childhood, that's no secret

And as a direct result of that, he craves both physical and emotional intimacy

And now that he has you, all of those needs that he couldn't fill before, are constantly being met and more

When he wakes up, you are there, either acting as his pillow and playing with his hair, or tucked under his arms, with him holding you close

When he's working, you are there, helping him with his tasks and chores, sneaking kisses along the way

And when he goes to sleep, you are there, looking up at him happily, maybe pressing some soft kisses to his lips before closing your eyes and dosing off

It's one of the things he prides himself on, that no matter what, you are always there

You make him so happy, and he is certain that no one else has ever felt this good before

You follow each other around like lovesick puppies

It's quite cute, honestly

You could be watching tv when toby will get up to get a snack, and you will follow suite

Or if you decide to go out (for food, feneral shopping, etc) toby will be not far behind, asking you to wait for him as he ties his laces

Of course, there is space given (although, bery rarely do either of you want space)

If you wanted to just go out and hangout with some friends for a night, toby would betotally ok with that

But when you get home, be prepared to never escape the kisses

He'll kiss you on your face, ears, hands, arms, neck

Anywhere he can get his lips, really

Cuddling normally consists of Toby laying on you in some way, but if you wanted to lay on him instead, or maybe be in some sort of "neutral" position, he'd love that just as much

But if you are ok with him laying on you, boy be prepared

His favorites are: 1) laying on your stomach, his arms wrapped around your hips and your fingers in his hair, or maybe even rubbing his back

2) laying between your legs, playing on his nintendo 3ds or scrolling on his phone, with at least one of your hands on his shoulder so he can kiss you as he pleases

3) laying on your chest and listening to your heartbeat, he especially likes if you play with his hair in this position, as it never fails to lull him into sleep

What's yours, is his

And what's his, is yours

If your around his size (or even bigger than him he doesnt care) he will absolutely steal your clothes

His favorites to steal are tee shirts, because he can wear them wherever, whenever

Also, if he's put in a situation where he can't sleep with you (for example, an overnight mission) he would pull out one of your tee shirts (yes, he always has one on him) and wraps it around whatever he sleeps on, so that he can still feel some semblance of sleeping with you

You are the only person allowed to touch his snack stash as well

His only condition is that whenever you want something, you owe him a kiss

Which of course, is something you are happy to do

Most times you will sneak up to him, whispering a "boo" in his ear, and wrapping him in a hug from behind

He smiles, and kisses your nose, and in turn, you kiss his cheek and wave the bag of snacks in front of him

"Wanna go snuggle?" You ask him in a soft whisper, giving soft kisses to his shoulder

He nods with a "mm-hmm" and the two of you go up to his room, getting comfy in his blanket and scooching in close together

Toby would literally move mountains if you wanted him to

All you have to do is ask <33

[wordy-little-witch]

I feel like I’m getting annoying with all these agere asks but I’m in a weird headspace rn and so my favs now have to regress and be happy so I can sleep better and maybe someone else gets a kick outta it I dunno? Anyways

I still love the idea that Buggy’s regression is mostly unrelated to wanting to wear certain clothes or long for certain toys or even a specific kind of food or such, I like to think it’s very „No. aesthetic“ type of regression, where you probably couldn’t tell at first glance and it’s not as easy as just giving him kiddie stuff and he’ll be happy. (Not to knock on anyone who does like the aesthetics and kiddie stuff just to be clear.) so he actually doesn’t have a bunch of toys and plushies and such and doesn’t really ask for them either.

…. THAT BEING SAID

Buggy should most definitely have an absolutely gigantic plush Fruitwani. Massive thing. It’s almost as big as Crocodile himself and that’s not counting the tail. A complete impulse purchase by Crocodile as well, being separated from his husbands for a while, having to delay reuniting them for another two days because of unforeseen circumstances and some unfortunate encounters with some Marines. Talking on the Denden to both of them and learning Buggy has had some bad regression days behind him. He doesn’t even let himself slip fully, there’s still a part of him that knows why Crocodile isn’t back with them, so he tries to stay in a big headspace when talking to him, but inwardly Buggy just wants to cry badly and curl up into Mihawks arms all day because Croccy isn’t home and he doesn’t LIKE it when people aren’t with him for too long because they may never come back. It’s a mess. Crocodiles suffering, Mihawk is suffering and Buggy is absolutely miserable.

So when Crocodile spots the giant plush toy sitting in a store window, surrounded by smaller plushtoys, his mind is immediately made up. Yes that one. Just for decoration? Not for sale? Well it is now. No. No that can be arranged. No the price doesn’t matter, he will leave this island with this absolute beast of a plush toy no matter how many Beri he has to spend or who he’ll have to harm if that what it takes. He WILL have that toy.

Buggy still clings to Crocodile more than usual when he gets back, no plush could ever replace the connection he was craving…. But after he has settled down a bit more the plush actually becomes on of his favorite toys. Not even just when he’s regressed, he just loves this thing. Has spooked several people wanting to talk business with Crossguild coming into the room finding chairman Buggy lounging on, what appears to be, a full sized Fruitwani , it just looks that convincing at first glance. For Buggy it’s not only cool and flashy, it’s a very, literally, big reminder that Crocodile cares about him in his own way, even when on some days the most he’ll get from him is a good morning kiss and the rest of the day is filled with snark towards him until he bids him and Mihawk goodnight again. It just means a lot to him to know he’s loved even when he’s being vulnerable or difficult.

Also yes, Crocodile also loves this thing and Mihawk has been on the suffering end of him and Buggy spooning the damn thing at night while he goes woefully unembraced on his side of the bed „ah yes, just me, my fiances, and the eight foot tall Applewani plush one of them threatened a shop owner over.“

Olay lemme preface this with some things

1) you're not annoying at all, and if anyone says you are, I'll eat their knees

2) I get it - honestly posting content for Buggy specifically for age regression was nerve wracking bc like. Idek really. But giving things I experience to characters I love is so cathartic, and I've spent more than a few nights just.... daydreaming about stuff like that just to be happy and comfy and cozy. No judgement on this blog, of that I promise you ♡♡♡

3) agere is valid every and any way, aesthetic or not, visible or not, it's doesn't matter, only the ways people feel. If you're safe, happy, and not harming anyone, you're doing so perfect and I love you and am proud of you

Now with my soap box stuff done, HOLY HECK YES YES PLZ I LOVE THIS I ADORE I NEED IT, GODS YOUR MIND!!!!! (/pos)

Buggy isn't a typical person, head to toe, inside out, he's Flashy but also incredibly subtle. His regression isn't some cookie cutter type of deal, he's wild and slightly feral in some ways, he's unusual and perfect and precious. His idea of a good time is knife games, climbing (everything is sight, nothing is sacred), explosions, and playing poker. He has a special rope that's just for him to tie and play with ((and occasionally chew on, though Mihawk has a mild heart attack every time he sees it while Crocodile cringes into the next plane of existence in disgust)).

At a glance, not much changes, but Mihawk can feel the change in Haki, and Crocodile can see the microscopic things there when Buggy shifts. He holds things differently, stims more visibly, just seems bouncier and even more animated yet somehow much more calm. The best explanation comes from Buggy himself in describing the shifting between his headspaces. "Some things turn off and others pop on open."

The worst thing to Buggy in general is a perception of loss or abandonment. Logically, he knows it isn't the case, and he can cling to that mostly, but experience has taught him that distance does NOT, in fact, make hearts grow fonder - at least, not for him. The one and only time he felt it may have applied - and this is a very tentative maybe - was when he reunited with his crew, made into Alvida's image and her decisions. There was no war over crew nor ship, just an allowance to slip back in as if he'd never quite left. The only changes or acknowledgement was Alvida's slightly awkward, brusque, yet lingering touch to his arm when she gave it a squeeze and remarked that "handling these hoodlums solo is not my idea if a good time." He was needed, and that did wonders for his security but not so much for the mental health.

Crocodile and Mihawk don't need him - he's the face man, sure, and he's got a talent for manipulation, speeches, rallying men. But at the end of the day, they outshine him despite their proclivities for the shadows. It's a juxtaposition. It's safe. It's wonderful, and Buggy still struggles to trust in the reliability there.

Logically, he knows- Croc is out, managing something for work, he's coming back, he will be back, he's not alone or abandoned or suddenly useless and worthless.

But he still feels it all.

And falling into his headspace to decompress is always harder when he's upset or scared, it only really works when he boils over, and the meltdown that would lead to is counterproductive. So he's waffling between the two, assured only by the calls, by Mihawk, and the few other places he can get some semblance normalcy and security.

When Crocodile does come home, a comically large plush toy over his shoulder, Buggy's already practically vibrating and is completely beyond the point of words in a positive way. He just squeals, lunges and the cushion of sand catching his weight is warm and safe and cozy and he clings, a clown themed koala, right there without shame.

The plush doesn't come up until later.

When someone inevitably asks - and, interestingly enough, it is Mihawk who does - Croc is honest. "Thought the clown would like it for longer trios like this."

The toy is big, yes, and also decently heavy, moreso than even it's size may seem. It's partially weighted in the tummy, legs and jaw, a display piece more than a toy for playing with, and Buggy is absolutely obsessed. It's Croco-sized, and it's a 'wani, and it's soft and cute and heavy. He loves it.

His first order of business is immediately dropping down to scramble under it and just... going limp. He wriggles a little, humming softly before falling still, cheek squished into his forearms, hair a mess but he's smiling, he's relaxed, he's comfy and happy and safe and with his boyfriends' Haki on the edges if his muffled, fuzzy awareness, he truly unwinds for the first time in over a week.

Crocodile carefully tugs his hair from under the toy with his hook, and Mihawk hands him a little fidget toy or a rope.

The toy is named later on, as demanded by a tiny jester with a frankly lethal set of baby doll eyes and quivering lip. Really, he could topple nations with that face, the other two swear.

Mihawk simply has to make peace with Addie the Applewani Cuddle Buddy having a semi permanent spot in the bed.

[party-noob]

RainbowRain: hey party noob! I hope you been treating the cat well, I came back to say I actually got cake this time..also wanted to say that my birthday is coming up soon too!

(My oc RainbowRains birthday is in April because well since he loves Rain and April is know for rain it’s makes sense :3)

🎉 “ da kitty is in da ovr room, hes bery nice! also, IM GUNS THROW U A BIRDAY PARTEE!! HAPPY BURFDAY!!! ” 🎉

[morningmask27]

Hiii I was just curious but what are your favorite Pokémon? You're one of my few mutuals who's also really into Pokémon so. I wanted to talk about it wi you! No pressure tho

heyyyy, you are very courageous to activate this topic since I've been currently busy with the scarvi dlc, but my all time fave's

NOIVERN

I don't even remember when I used it for the first time and how I fell so in love with it (it definitely wasn't the anime tho, I barely watched it). I just know I saw this funny bat and I fell in love.

Usually when thinking about Noivern I think about my Noivern oc Wydra, who's just a little chaotic berry thief of a threat. Very silly, bery casual. but i did a flying-type only run of pokemon Y not so long ago and Cloudburst the noivern I used there was also a fun one to play with (alongside Acerbus my beloved (mega)aerodactyl)

Noivern might not be on the same level as many other dragon-flying types, but it's the best one in my heard, and with a very good speed, decent special attack and a powerful boomburts, plus stabs, and fire coverage, it does hit quite well. And thus I often want to include one in my playthroughs of games, but I try to moderate it since I want to diversify the pokemon I use (that's the reason I did the flying run in Y; perfect excuse to have both Noivern AND aerodactyl and other pokemon in my team).

A few of my other all-time favs are the delphox and primarina line (I do have a weakness for the furbaits, sorry not sorry). Swampert was also my first pokemon and i'll always carry some special fondness for it.

alolan ninetales and togekiss also have a special place in my heart, for oc and playthrough reasons. Togekiss is very fun to use on an adventure team and I have one old alolan ninetales oc (I will probably never talk about them here because it's not something i'm too proud of, but maybe if I revamp them fully?). Also a shiny Eevee I randomly got in pokemon legends arceus is The Shiny Eevee for me. It's level 100, but I refuse to evolve it. it'll be my wonderful little baby eevee forever <3. ALSO Giratina. I shiny hunted one in ultra sun and this little baby is my beloved

Paldea right now is also making me have a lot of fun with the new pokemon.

I LOVE Meowscarada, Glimmora, Chi-Yu and Walking Wake. these four are setpieces of my ultimate team in scarlet. they're my little blorbo's. Chamomille the silly Meowscarada, Erebos my calm and competent (aka ruthless) Glimmora, Tyche the max spe-att, full ev-iv trained, beads of ruin, flamethrower, maxxed metronome, tera fire Chi-Yu (nothing survives this, they made a goldfish so murderous) and Walking Wake, the goofy dino-suicune

[xsammei-her-belovedberyl]

Beryl peeled the apple 🍎 , separated it in halves

Then we feed each other ♡

💗

[the-official-account]

I HAVE BEEN INFORMED THERE'S A NEW EPISODE HERE'S 26 LIVEBLOG BABEEEEYYYY

my podcatcher is cool and great and open source and ad free and all that shit but I haven't set up my notifications good and because this is my first episode as they come out (my inner fanatic is all grown up) im not used to the schedule but HHHASD;LPIG AHIP'LSF AG THE WAY I SCREEEEEAMED AND ACTUALLY DANCED FOR JOY HERE WE GO!!!!!

oh opening music my beloved. Oh shit I got so obsessed with Blorbos I briefly forgot exactly where we are in the story. Coping mechanism (slash joking slash lighthearted) im 👀👀👀👀 very hyped bery concerned

"you need to be making eye contact to be frozen" means it's vry easy to free spar!!! ahhh so they somehow duplicated the pendants....or found more??

BACKUP THINGS 👀👀👀👀👀👀👀 IM ON DESKTOP AND I CAN ONLY HAVE ONE EMOJI COPIED TO MY CLIPBOARD AT AT TIME ASJKDLHFASDFH

also the title of this episode is making me excited

Ila's stress about spar's condition is such a mood

THIS TELEKENISIS NECKLACE THING IS SO BANGER.

ooh. oof. this drive. CRIT?????? NICE FUCK. WHEW.

SUUCESSED THE FUCK OUTA THAT.

Voracity fucking sucks sorry about your lineage bestie i do hope you die though

SPAR BALANCED HALWAYD ON A CATWALK, FROZEN, SNUGGLED UP TO AN AWFUL AWFUL VAMPIRIC ASSHOLE UHHHH

......that joker.

OH I FORGOT VELLUM CAN TELEPORT FOR A SEC with the power of looking INCREDIBLY sexy. I like this plan I'm feeling good about this plan

Jordan's clearly plotting some shit and i am HERE for it

"normally you are not conscious during it" NORMALLY???

Spar depersonalization crash course. OH WAIT NO SPAR STEVEN UNIVERSE MOMENTS. IM OBSESSED????

viscious spar.....hmmm......im making a face it's not a great face LASDFALHFAHS

I love that spar's first thing is to just get the gist of what he's got going on <3 LJSADFLKJAHSDJFKHASD HE GOES TO VELLUM A;LKSDFLJSHDFLJSADGFLJSHADFKAHSDFKLASDF SCOOBY DOO ASS LOVE BIRDS

Oh shit is Vellum gonna think spar is fucking dead???? VORACITY GOES TOPPLING WHICH IS HILARIOUS BUT SPAR TOO??????? HOLY SHIT????? LMAO????

we are thirteen minutes in.

IF YOU DIE IN YOUR BODY YOU DIE IN REAL LIFE ALKSDJF;LAKSDJFASKLD;FJALSDFJ

Essay protesting Voracity's stats is such a mood. What if...what if ya jus didn???

As spooky as this whole situation is, the mental image of spar having royallllly biffed it is sending me

Okay when I was very young, I used to play chess with a younger sibling of mine. And I did this thing where I would just take one rook and systematically go around capturing all their pawns because they didn't know how to protect them, while just kinda giggling. And that's the energy ipswitch is bringing right now, tkaing out all their backup.

EIGHT FUCKING CARDS

AD;ISFLG;ALKDSGASLDFK RING TOSS SITIONATION wasn't jakub with ipswitch? or going to him? and yeahhhh lunevella is an important ally.

Diamond? friend? mmmmmmmmmmmmnahhhh

YEAH LUNAVELLA!!!! MASSIVE WITCH LADY COME IN CLUTCH!

nooo fuck PLEASE dont make it diamond please please please LUNEVELLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA lesbiamb...YEAS

I forget what beloved does but mechanical nonsense is my favorite

NO SUCESSES ONE JOKER there are not emojis on this computer that describe...you know that one image of the hot cook guy from Queer eye looking traumatized? that.

"I'm having fun being a useless ghost boy" VALID i am also having fun. sometimes in a ttrpg you just wanna be/add to the problem for a bit!!! And that's ok

Voracity being pissed about being launched off the catwalk is SO Funny.

"so I could accomplish my goal without violence" BITCH YOU THREATENED TO MURDER SEVREAL-----FJHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

NO NO NO VORACITY ISNT ALLOWED TO CRIT LEAVE VELLUM ALOOOOOOOONE!!!!!!!!!

oh shit but vellum's turn now.......kick them back off!!!!!! asjdhfakjsdhfasdkflakdhf

TAEKWONDO!! switching instantly for a drive does seem like a good balance I like that mechanic

god I love my gay rule-abiding detectives who for some reason keep trying to fight the ONE being that EVERY rule is like don't fucking fight for the love of god do not fight them for the LOVE OF

"I imagine that vellum gets a cat stance, which is like an L stance" i know there is more informaiton here but my brain has already shifted into the "someone i know is talking about something they love and i understand very little of what's happening here but I'm just excited to listen" mode. But no i do need to know what cat stance is because this is so art in my brain. ill look it up later.

im so *chinhands*

OOOOOH BUT THIS DESCRIPTION IS SO GOOD i CAN SEE IT IN MY BRAIN SO WELL OOOOHAS;DFHKLASEHFASKDFHA VELLUM IS SO COOL

there are no ascii emojis for doing a silly stupid little happy stim but that's what's happening

oh shit luna can fly!

Lune deserves to be condescending to her enemies, she's dealt with so much bullshit.

Ooof we have the AA and now the bramble guard with MOTORCYCLES????? ugh!!! organizations!!!!! Lore!!!!!!!! im swooning. there is nothing sexier in my mind that good worldbuilding

tatiana related plans but not htis episode 👀👀👀👀👀👀👀????

yeah lmao fuck diamond.

okay but in my brain Desdemona was suuuuuuper pretty. Oh no!!! Don't make her endearing!!!!!!!

(sweetly) "So uhhh, people of cindershore as you can see....we have the people of theee passion fruit festival held hostage <3"

THEY WANTED TO DO THIS NON VIOLENTLY god fuck i hate fucking misinformation goddamn.

"side with crystallis of againse you own wellbeing" bestie how is that fucking nonviolent?????

"get your gummy jello fingies in here" hello i am uncomfortablleeee AHSDL;FHASDFHADJSFLHAKDSFJH

TERRORIST TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES

I like to imagine that Kit's comments was ipswitch being genuinely helpful

oh god. there was a SPLIT second moment when my entirely world lit up with the GLEE that was Voracity biffing it off the catwalk again.

vellum pulls them...up? NOOO I MEAN THATS SMART BUT AHHHHH IM STAKING THE PROTAGONISTS LIKE A MIRACA (how the FUCK do you spell this im pretty sure i knew that) STOP PUTTING YOURSELF IN HARMS WAY AHHHHHHHHHH

i swear to GOD the host have an uncanny ability to say the joke i was thinking and I think we've just all got the same internet brain rot. my FIRST thought here was "None successes? left beef." and there we go. no funny left for the rest of us.

oooh what's jakub up to

WITCH TIME WITCH TIME WITCH TIME

"leave diamond where they are" you know, cause fuck em.

LUNA VELLA COMING IN FRIGGGGGING CLUTCH.

"Lunavella casts a spell that was taught to her by tara. Lunavella later taught it to jasper, who used it to talk to a god at a very crucial time"

the VOLUME at which i just sais "HUH?????" is IMMENSE.

WHAT DOES THAT MEAN??? HELLP???? NO DONT MOVE ON HELLO??? HI! hIS I HAVE QUESTIONS?

Did jasper do the untethering???? Did jasper PERSONALLY speak to mommy magic???? Is that was Tara did to sacrifice her connection to magic for Merim & Josepha's freedom????? what...what does this mean....

SHE'S TALKING TO KRONOSAVA SHE CALLED THIS RELIC'S FUCKING PARENT. SHE SAID SHE'S GOING TO THE MANAGER. AJSHDFAJSHDFLKAJSHDF

An animatronic giant....HMMMMMM

okay but what is the triple threat if not just a small, minimalist mech suit?

"oh i do like information" "I know!!! Me to!!!" Oh my god they're suchhhh fucking nerds i fucking love them HASKLDJHFASDHFAKDJLFH GET ME TO A CLOSET.

AND JAKUB BLUSHES. AND OF COURSE IPSWITCH DOESN'T NOTICE CAUSE ITS IPSWITCH. THIS IS CUTE AS FUCK

I WANNA TRY TO POSSESS VORACITY Spar has been a ghost for like 2 minutes, and he was already like "When in rome!!!"

Kronosava manifests as a NINE FOOT TALL CLOCKWORK PERSON WITH MANY CLOCK FACES OF IMPOSSIBLE GEOMETRY????? COOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLL FUCKING RAD RAD RAD

Spar's ALONE with the TIME GOD al;jsdflkasdjfasdjlf

he did NOT just introduce himself....holllly shit lmaooo. "those who may be frozen by my eye are unworthy by my sight" oh so Spar is like. Time daddy's favorite blorbo. This makes sense to me. or maybe somewhat.

KRONOS SAY YALL KINDA SUCK SO I MADE YA DIE, CAUSE FUCK EM

Spar is NOT fucking out logicing this GOD im So here for this. fuck em up bestie FUCK EM UP!!!!!!

imagine your last name being considered by the GOD OF TIME now that's what I call clout.

"relative innocence" yeahhhhh. peace and lvoe on the planet earth, but emphasis on "on the planet earth"

Mayor lipton is the mayor of cindershore.

Okay I understanbd this scene im loving the vibes but MERIM FELSPAR THE SECOND IS NOOOOOTTTTT THE JUSTICE SYSTEM MR. TIME DADDY!!! He can't awnser for the crime and bigroties of Extra #8 and 13

YOU MAKE A GODDEX CHUCKLE that line will be living in my brain as something that can be so symbolism

I....I...I don't like this. wow i HATE how fast spar just traded off year of his fucking life span noooooo. fuck. fuck. fuckity fuck fuck fuck im in distress. ughhhhhh spar being spar.......I will have thoughts but first I need to sigh a lot ......Ugh.

but also fuck the gods im not vibing with this barter situation. is it good for the plot YES is deicide always an aspiration of mine also yes

"it feels like licking a battery with your hand' oooh mental sensory imaginings not good but very very cool

Like sourpatch kids watermelon flavor colorscheme.

*sadly, with hesitation* midtro dance midtro dance....

guhhhh spar....Spar why. Like I understand the choice but that was SO fast. HE DIDNT THINK ABOUT IT AND THAT'S WHAT I --UGHHHHHH

happy late birthday to essay!

ESSAY PLEASE STOP ASTRALLY PROJECTING PLACES ALSDFL;ASHFDLASHDFLKASF

Spar is a snacker and habituatally hands people snacks to keep them sustained.

God yall are just begging for me to write a communion (slash literary term related to chrstian, not christian practice itself. for as much as i say the words lord and god i like barely know who jesus is) fic....soon my toils will be over and my backlog will sing so my like the sirens lulling me away from an approaching storm, so instead my hyperfixation can crash violently upon the rocks and. it. will. be. GLORIOUS.

VELLUM WON A LEETLE KEETY <3<3<3

KIT CAME OUT SWINGING WITH THIS????? ....HUH????? BESTLJHAS;DIFHASDHFASJDFALKDSFKJASF. KIT SAID "IPSWITCH LOOKS AT SOME GAY SHIT END OF SENTENCE" IM DEAD. Im just imaginging Jakub looking at the performers, and at ipswitch, and at the performers, and in his head he's like "why does he look contemplative?"

Xbala, hilde, grey, anya play shoots and ladders at the safe house while knowing Spar, Vellum, ip, Jakub, and Luna are risking their lives fighitng voracity....that was me typing for speed but "Ip" as a nickname is really cute imo.

*much more enthusiatic end of midtro dance*

ILA I DON'T THINK THAT'S GOOD NEWS. DODGE IS ONE. AH. OH NO. HHHHH.

i made i sound like ID been bitten. Voracity. Rancid bestie, what if we like....didnt...

LIASDFASDJFASDF VELLUM'S BLOOD TASTES WIERD?????

*A deep sigh as I realize by having Beloved as a ultimate Vellum is, in fact, another self-sacrificial blorbo for the lot.*

Oh fuck he's so determined and valliant but i want him to STOP.

People should be reinvigorating and spar should be around soon??? im....spoooked. I know being unconcious isn't the end of the world though....

I think some of the gumw as given to Anya and may not have ever been returned? Which i only mention as a brief note for efforts and because these eps are recorded long ahead of time: i aint a snitch

spar to the recsue <3 <3 <3 king I'm imagining spar like Baseball-sliding in, swinging the sword like he's going to a home run, in slow motion. It's VERY cool.

SPAR IS AJUDSHLKJSAHGFKLJSADFGHAS THIS IS FO FUNNY I FUCKING LOVE THIS.

OHHHHH JUST ONE SHORT.

OH. OH SHIT. OH. PLEASE FLIP GOOD OH MY GOD. ID WOULD BE SCREAMING BUT IF I START SCREAMING i CAN'T HEAR.

AHHHHH;LFRGHA jumped so hard I pulled my chair up off the floor and keysmashed irrespocibly enough to put my compter to sleep. I'm SO normal.

The Animaation of this that exists in my brain through. Vellum gets bitten and Voracity reals back enough for you to see, between their faces, spar sprinting towards them reaching for his sword. The Camera whips to a side angle for spar's baseball swing. Slice! Spray of blood as vellum gets up a bit. Shot from below spar's chin to show his determined face and the long line of his arm and Bang! Bang! They all drop until his gun clicks empty. As there's a zoom in on the bat going for the window. One last bang and as Spar looks down the Camera does too, to show Vellym propped up on one arm holding His derringer high for a beat before his arms fall when he slumps in relief and he just smiles as ash rains down around them. Spar falls to his knees, and vellum slides over to kiss him...augh. AUGH!

Spar with a subtle scar over his hear that after 26 is raised and more obvious. For you know. Eventual shiftless art that WILL happen

Oh shit Jakub's getting a fucking promotion, huh?

LKJUAHSFGKJAHSKDFAHSDFKLASD IPSWITCH FINDS TERRORISM TAX FRAUD EVIDENCE I LOOOVE THAT FOR HIM OH MY GODDD <3.

Okay but Jakub being attracted to that is SO dorky and i love them and they're such sillyy guyssss. IPSWITH STARTLES.

"i have one more thing to end on!" [the episode has twnety minutes left]

Governor thorn middle ages. violet haired. carries a spear. CLEARLY need to pack her ass up and fuck off before she messes with Hilde, Anya, Grey and Xbala. I was only gonna mention my favoirites out of that grpup but not yeah they're all good. So throne need to like. go. I don't trust this.

"What's this about? how do you know where this is?" GOOD QUESTIONS.

FUCK. OFF. UNDER ARREST FOR WHAT. BITCH?

NO. NO. YOU DONT GET TO FUCKING END CREDITS MUSIC AFTER THAT FUCK YOU. FUCK OFF. WHAT. WHAT?

What.

i HEARD KEVIN AND I ACTUALLY GASPED. ITS MY FAVORITE CRINGEFAIL KING!!!!

CATBOY ASCE!!!!!!

OH WAIT im realizing....If SUITS has been abolished that Spar did retire after all, huh? Huh. Good for not having to report info about clovenheart. BAD news for whatever the fuck is happening to jack. Interesting news for Vellum's blood theirvery theories. And damn, I just sort of assumed Mayor Thorne was just like...Good Guy(TM) until....well until chapter 3 of tempest and teapots yesterday. God i love stories where things only get bigger. crunchy as hell.

THEY HAVE TO BOTH WEAR HIS CLOTHES STACKED ASJLDFALSDJFADF

I'm in love with Asce's himbo ass, he should NOT be enabling this and YET.

Iris has jury duty and then she's getting a massage and then she's going to therapy and then doing her therapy homework: considering new employment.

DOES CASEDYWM FUCKING STICK THEM IN HIS ACTUAL POCKET??????? OH NO.

ARE THEY JUST GONNA KEEP THE PIXIES IN HIS POCKET THE WHOLE TIME?

"I just need to know whose on top and whose...whose...whose the legs" Ah, when nature denies us our low hanging fruit

oh god I hope asce is left handed because otherwise Caedyn';s hand is occupied and Asce only has access to his non dominant hand

SDLFASDFAJSDFLASDF "I DONT KNOW HOW IT HELPS BIT I WANT IT"

"IS CADEWYN'S noSE PIECED" "IT IS NOW"

ASDKJFA;LSDJFASDF FUCK

added together they look like a great mintaur, yeah!! If someone shakes their head back and forth very fast

peer pressure confusion...sweet jesus.

JSADLFJALKDSFJAS just look abnormnal and blend in!!! This stratedgy would work in many of my social circles to be fair.

Not CALHOUN (just finished reading the 1619 project, that's the last name of the probably most cartoonishly evil & racist person in that entire book. Which, if anything, makes this mor funny for me

HE GIVES CADEWYN MORE ALCOHOL. NOOOO LMAOOOOOO

A BRILLIANT TACTICAL PLAY YOU'RE NOT HIGH LEVEL ENOUGH TO GET FULL DETAILS ON.

I was gonna make a joke about xbala getting arrested in the background but then it hit me: anya is a defense lawyer. A defense lawywer who already fucking hates Thorn. A defense lawyer who already hates thorn who has made up with spar and befriended Xbala and in all likelyhood has the support of the Harrington's behind her. She might. She might fuck it up. Take no prisoners, but like, the opposite way that's usually meant. still just as fuckign rad tho. my brain is turning. rotating like a microwave plate. mmmmmmmmm.

That scene was so funny though. cherry on top of a wonderful episode. i have...i have things to consider.

@threeheartscast @citrusandsalt @ilaalexei

[daddyfuckedme]

In 2018 I was diagnosed with a chronic disease (illness? idk the difference, English is not my native language) and lost 10kg in a week. I was hospitalized and once I got back home I was so weak I couldn't open a plastic coke bottle on my own.

Before this happened I was very fit. Even if I hadn't worked out as much as I did in 2016 I was still bery fit and strong. I lost all of it. All my muscle mass just went away. I was nothing but skin and bones for months. I swore to myself that I would rather be fat than go through this again.

Well... I'm not fat, but definitely chubby now. I can't work out like before all this, I get too exhausted and insecure. I keep gaining weight no matter what I do, I've lost all control over my body. I used to be so proud of it. Now I want to hide it under layers of clothing.

The change happened so fast. I was fit and strong all up until 2018, at 21 years old. I'm 10kg over my "ideal body weight" and I can't lose any of it. I keep blaming the circumstances, I'm too paranoid to go outside even just for a walk, gyms would kill me. Besides I prefer calisthenics and going to the gym to do body weight exercise feels like a waste. But either way I get exhausted after five minutes, and then sad and frustrated. I keep thinking that if I just was able to move to a house with fewer neighbors instead of an apartment I would be at ease, I could go for walks. I used to love being outside until my oarents threw me out of their house in 2017.

I don't know what to do. I was never meant to be like this. I don't recognize the body in the mirror, it can't be me, I dont look like that.

Oh baby, first of all I am so fucking sorry this is happening to you. I like to think gyms would kill me so i only take walks as well (haha). Even talking on the phone to a good friend and pacing while you do so could be of some benefit. May i ask what your doctors have said if you came to them with this dilemma? Or if you have mentioned it at all yet. It doesn't matter what size your body is, i've gained weight too from certain medications but it's okay to love yourself and your body even if you feel you aren't at your best, nobody is judging you as hard as you judge yourself, and when you realize this people aren't as scary anymore. I love you, please be strong for your sake and mine, and feel free to come off anon anytime so we can talk more about this and happier things happening in your life. <3

[pumpkzsafeplace]

hi punkin, thank you for the advice it was very helpful and thank you for comforting me I appreciated it bery much…

I suppose its just hard sometimes even tho I know what helps me… going into nature and walks also helps me un-dissociate(?) like you said, ids just hard to get out by mgself even for walks cuz even though I live somwwhere safe my family worries a lot and doesnt let me go out for walks by myself on the bike trail near me where i like to walk

As for my “caregiver” they arnt really my cg, they’re just a friend that knows I regress that I feel safe w and subconsciously rwgress around a lot, he takes care of me and makes me deel safe when that happens too so I kind of look at him as my cg but he’s not really… and i don’t want to ask too much from someone that’s not responsible or obligated to take care of me… especially when he makes me feel so safe when I regress by accident when I’m w him… i don’t wanna push him away and sometimes i fel like I’m too clingy alteady and he doesn’t want tlk to me :(

i don’t want to be a nuisance or bothersome eapecially if he’s busy or hust doesn’t want to tlk to me specifically :(

-🍓

─•~❉᯽❉~•─

hihi lil bug’ 🌼

i understand love :<

why not just sit in your garden then? or even by a window- just for some fresh air <3. you could even paint what you see, that's something i like to do sometimes if i physically can't go outside <3.

have you thought of asking him to be your caregiver? or wondered about possibly getting a caregiver to help? it's completely okay if you don't want to. you don't have to have a caregiver to be an age regressor <3.

why not surround yourself with other littles then? you could be little together and look after one another. that's what me and my little friends do <3. you can even join some servers if you'd like? when i used to join them- they had things like art corners, and storytime corners? it could feel less lonely- you know? plus then you won't feel guilty asking your caregiver friend to help?

it's up to you love, do whatvever you feel comfortable with! <3

we will always be here to support regardless <3.

big big big big hugs love & i hope you feel better soon :< <3

-🍰

[happyhere]

Assalamualaikum.. halo tumblr..

4 bulan berlalu dari aku terakhir tulis di sini tentang *diriku*, dan tadaaaa aku kembali hari ini. (18 April 2023) --- dihari yang 'seharusnya' jadi hari kerja terakhir sebelum cuti bersama nasional untuk lebaran 2023, tapi kenyataannya, insyaa Allah besok aku masih ngajar di Paud karna kami belum libur😆

Pasti tumblr ngerasa juga kalau aku lagi ga terlalu "baik" sebaik itu, sampai aku kembali kesini lagi --- mau curhat😆

Tumblr, 1/3 dari tahun ini berlalu, tapi menurutku, ini sangat berat.

Financially (utamanya), mentally (kadang), aku dan mamaku makin sering lempar jokes "kok gini kali yaa hidup kita"

Tapi semoga Allah selalu tau, bahwa kadang aku cuma cape, tapi jauh dihatiku paling dalam, aku yakin, aku yakin kalau aku bisa ngelaluin ini semua baik baik karena Allah akan selalu tolong aku, Allah akan selalu ada bersamaku. Cuma kadang aku masih tiba tiba sedih aja..

Kaya tadi sore; udah lama aku ga mau nangis nangis kalau aku ngerasa aku mah kok susah bener ya mau afford ini itu, mana bills banyak yg mau dibayar, ini gimana gitu bayarnya gimanaa aku bingung :") dan tadi sore kaya beneran jadi puncak aku bingung sekali, pengen nangis banget tapi ditahan karna gaada space untuk nangis sendirian (karna masih sore dan masih duduk duduk sama mama), jadi aku unconsciously whispering in heart,

"5 tahun hampir berlalu dari ayah udah ga disini lagi,dulu lala kira 5 tahun kemudian dari ayah pergi lala akan semakin baik baik aja, tapi ternyata hari ini engga, yah. Tolong ayah bilang sama Allah ya disana, ease our burdens here a bit, tolong bantu lala disini.. Lala bingung."

Sedih.. kok aku masih belum bisa sedewasa itu padahal udah lama encounter keadaan yg beginian terus. Tapi malam ini juga aku baca sedikit lanjutan bacaanku kemarin "Call Upon Him" dari Mizi Wahid. Mataku langsung berkaca kaca, aku nangis.

Jadi constantly mikir : gimana bisa aku kebingungan sementara aku punya Allah?

Kenapa aku gayakin kalau aku bisa lewati ini, sementara Allah sudah janji, kalau kita berbicara, Dia akan dengar, kalau kita minta, Dia akan beri.

Aku yg ternyata masih ragu ragu, bodoh dan ga sabaran. Naujubillah min zalik.

Seconds after aku jadi lebih tenang, kaya, "gapapa berarti ini semua gapapa, these shall too pass, and Allah will get me through this again."

Sekarang, jam 10:27 di hapeku tapi kata adik ku jam nya ini kelambatan 12 menit,yg berarti jam 10:39, aku mau nangis tulis ini, tapi aku sudah lebih yakin, seperti yg ditekankan dalam 2 ayat surah Al Insyirah, kalau sesungguhnya bersama kesulitan ada kemudahan, dan kurasa --- kalau itu yg jadi pedoman hidupku saat ini pun sudah cukup.

Aku harap, tarikan nafasku bisa lebih ringan terlebih apapun yg terjadi, ketulusan dan komitmen ku dalam berdoa dan berusaha bisa meningkat lebih baik setiap hari, jadi aku bisa lebih dekat sama Allah, dan tidak tinggi hati. Karna jujur,aku yg gapunya apa apa gini aja kadang masih ngerasa aku lebih baik dari orang lain 😭 naujubillah min zalik ya Allah.

Semoga Allah selalu jaga hati kita dari sifat sombong, iri dengki dan munafik, juga lindungi aku dan keluargaku, dan kita semua, dan senantiasa membimbing kita untuk selalu meyakini akan Takdir Nya, Kebesaran Nya, Kuasa Nya. Jadi apapun yg kita lalui, kita jadi orang orang yg yakin kalau ini sudah yg terbaik, dan yang perlu kita lakukan hanyalah berusaha dan berdoa untuk yang terbaik.

Aku mungkin gaakan tulis tulisan ini disini kalau aku ga menghadapi masalah ini disini. Jadi those all brought me here, and bismillah it'll always bring me to the best version of me (I always willing to seek)🌻

Sudah dulu ya, baterai hapeku tinggal 14%, sampai ketemu di cerita cerita baikkk selanjutnya, Tumblr-ku!

Wassalamualaikum.

With love and warmth, happyhere.

Note :***u guys should be happy (like my username here) anytime u encounter this acc and read the posts. Have a nice dream! 😆

[hudanordiny]

Prolog : Surat Cinta Ke Syurga

2 September 2020

Assalamualaikum,

To my dearest love,

Sebelum ni sayang tulis kat notes, untangling my thoughts since you passed away. Sebab terlalu banyak persoalan dan memori bermain di fikiran. Then I plan to stop writing because I know eventually I need to live 'without' you. But, I still want to embrace this moment and feeling, so sayang rasa tulis kat e-mel lagi besar ruang. I’m writing to you, feels like 'talking' to you. Actually it's more like writing to me. 

Harini hari ke-42 you pergi. Sayang masih sama, ada hari ok, ada hari tak ok. But getting better insyaAllah. 2 hari lepas, anak kita, 3 tahun alhamdulillah. Dia makin bijak dan cheeky. Ada je trick nak kenakan sayang Sekarang dia asyik tidur lambat. Puas tidur siang kot atau memang saja nak main dengan sayang sebab siang sayang work. She miss you so much. Kadang2 malam dia tidur tak lena. Kalau menangis merajuk, mesti cari you. Kalau dulu sayang mesti nangis sekali. But now sayang dah makin kuat. Sayang cuba tenangkan dia tanpa nangis. Sayang mesti tunjuk kuat depan dia kan? Alhamdulillah bila sayang explain dia faham. So peranan sayang memang penting untuk kuatkan emosi dia. Semalam sebelum tidur, dia cakap dia mimpi ayah. so sayang saja tanya dia buat apa dengan ayah. dia jawab dia main dengan ayah. pastu sayang tanya ayah cakap apa kat ibu. Ibu cakap ibu rinnndu ayah. Pastu dia cakap, 'eh takpe ibu. ayah kan sekarang kat syurga'. Bijak sangattt. insyaAllah. 

Ok so sebenarnya nak cerita 31 Ogos buat tahlil untuk you dan atuk2 nenek2. Harap Allah terima amal dan doa kami dan harap sampai pada you. Hanya itu yang kami mampu beri sekarang ini. Lepas tu makan2 dan celebrate birthday anak kita. Seronok la dia ada kek and semua orang nyanyi untuk dia. Mama Ayah and semua adik-beradik you ada sekali alhamdulillah. Mesti lagi best kalau you ada sekali, Tapi rupanya Allah dah preparekan kitorang, since last year you takde sekali to celebrate. Last year you warded. Apa2 sayang still syukur, keluarga kita semua sihat dan kuat silaturrahim alhamdulillah insyaAllah.

Next story, semalam kawan you dari Jakarta message sayang. Tanya khabar you sebab dia dah lama tak nampak update you kat IG. Rupanya dia taktau lagi pasal you. Terus sayang rasa bersalah, patut sayang update IG you terus sekali haritu. Tapi takpelah. So semalam sayang update IG you. Perasaan tu, menyesakkan dada. Taktau kenapa. Maybe because I don’t want to update, but I need to update it. As a final post in your IG. So yeah. Sesak tapi melegakan insyaAllah. 

Its already September 2020. Sayang kena move on. AA Plus kata subtle change. I need to change. Ini adalah jalan yang Allah dah tetapkan untuk sayang. Nak taknak, sayang kena terima. I already have a few plans to do. But I don’t want to move on from you too early. At least sampai tempoh iddah. Until then, I will keep cherish our memories, looking at our videos, pictures and conversation. Bila tengok balik semua tu, ada je benda yang sayang belajar, benda baru perasan. Tadi pun scroll balik FB you. Ramai orang cakap baik2 tentang you, sayang rasa sangaaaat bertuah jadi isteri you. Like apa yang diorang cakap tu betul, and I got to know and be with you 24/7 is a blessing. You’re indeed a good man. Sayang syukur jadi isteri you. No words to describe. Alhamdulillah.  

Sayang ada banyak lagi nak cakap. Rasa nak cerita kat orang. Tapi kalau cerita kat orang lain, rasa tak puas sebab they don’t really understand. Nak legakan sikit tu adalah. But I like to write like this. Feel much better. Lain hari nanti boleh baca balik hehe. And I know I have Allah to tell in my prayers. Doakan sayang istiqomah menjadi muslimah yang lebih baik, diredhai Allah dan husnul khotimah insyaAllah. 

Love you as always, Tunggu sayang di pintu syurga. 

[aesopsbaby]

HELLOOOO

i feel so ready for this event i literally have a list of charas i like/adore LMAO

personality-wise, i am a dumbass. I tend to put things off until it's too late or it's beginning to become late,, i am also beri shy 👉👈 im using copious amounts of my courage to even send this ask,, pff,, although i am shy, I've been called insane by friends (mostly because i reduce people's braincells by my shenanigans LMAO)!! I am a virgo and use she/they pronouns !!

[L→R] Goro Akechi from Persona 5, Kokichi Ouma from Danganronpa V3, Shikanoin Heizou from Genshin Impact, Licorice Cookie from Cookie Run, Shax Lied from Welcome to Demon School! Iruma, and last but not the least, the bastard who has taken ahold of my brain before brainrot was even coined as a term, Vector/Ray Shadows/Rei Shingestsu from Yu-Gi-Oh Zexal II

YAUYAYAY HII CHISEE!! :D

Out spoken people seem to be a reoccurring pattern

You when: Emotionally damaged but intelligent people

People that aren't afraid to speak their own mind, you find comfort in it as they'd be able to speak out for you.

You let people rant to you and you listen to their every details, trying your very best to reply to their every words. Because you don't wish to make them feel as if their feelings aren't valid. Because, you don't want them to feel how you had felt when people ignored you.

You're a words of affirmations person,,,,maybe,,,

Or you're someone that craves for genuine acts of love and if it's from people that are cosntantly doing things with an agenda, you'll know that they're being genuine in their actions when you receive gifts or witness them throwing in a small comment when you're feeling insecure.

Needing reassurance from people(?)

When people that have a different personality from how they potray themselves infront of public eyes>>>>>

Most well-suited in my opinion:

Goro Akechi!

Your personality just matches to me right away!

He'd be the one to remind you of your due-dates for assignments/errands while you groan and whine- (me too tbh)

He'll have troubles opening up/asking for help even if he really needs it, but I think you'd be able to step in without saying a word to assist him <3

Just basically a perfect match tbh!!

[xsammei-her-belovedberyl]

Tomorrow it will be 500 days of our love ! 🥹😍♥️

😍♥️♥️♥️