#and he’s tied into some of the other players’ stuff so now they get to sorta safely interrogate him too

[apollos-boyfriend]

Hey I've been observing from afar through your reaction blogging, I haven't been in mcyt as much since the dsmp ended but I still care about a lot of the people in the mcyt circle and I'm interested in what goes on - care to give a rundown of what happened at this twitch rivals thing everyone keeps talking about? (no pressure only if you want to) Aside from the fact I'm sure it was terribly run like most twitch rival events are, but it sounds like there was more to it than that

okay so. i am going to be missing quite a few details because i missed a day myself + my streamer could not care less, so i heavily encourage others to add on stuff i missed

this was a multi-day competition, running for 5 days with prize rewards from 1k to 100k. it started with i think 150 players, with select numbers of people getting eliminated each round. day 1-2 are fairly normal, at least for twitch rivals. of all the games that got played through the whole event, i'd say like 1 was actually good, and maybe 2 were decent, at best. most are bad, poorly-executed, poorly thought out, or just boring in terms of both player enjoy-ability and content creation.

DAY 3 EDIT:

now, sapnap's been sapnap for this entire event already. obnoxious, a bad sport, but most notably, playing DMCA'd songs. the event ran on proximity chat, so while he was unmuted, everyone around him would also be subject to said songs, which could mute vods at worst and terminate accounts at best. most people are fed up with him at this point. while everyone's trying to come up with solutions for the glitch, sapnap spams the discord with useless shit. couriway calls him out in the discord, calling him annoying and obnoxious, then later calling him a cunt in twitch chat. sapnap uses couriway and feinberg's name in his stream title for clickbait and talks shit about them + their friends (hbg/house builder gang). he also makes some weird comment asking if couri is homophobic because sap was talking about having skeppy's dick in his mouth?? or something?? i'm unsure exactly how day 3's issue of the glitch resolved.

day 4 is also your average experience with your usual range of average to horribly painful games. sapnap continues to be a bitch and not take responsibility for his stans attacking anyone in sight, but what else is new

day 5 is. bad. the game set for deciding the final competitors can be cheesed (if you let someone else do all the work, you can punch them in the last second and steal their win) and eliminates like 20 people at once. on top of that, a glitch happens that leaves the server on standby for at least 30 minutes while admins decide what to do. firebreathman sends a picture of a bare naked ass in the discord. someone else sends a photo of their debit card. streamers entertain themselves in various ways, including growing a cactus (fulham), playing osu (purpled), collecting other people's streams for their overlay (fruitberries), playing slime rancher (badboyhalo), and building real-life furniture (couriway). tubbo (who was already eliminated at this point) starts jumping between streams and asking in chat for the tea. the game is eventually replayed, deciding the final 4 players, but it's just as broken and at that point, no one wants to be there anymore. it's revealed through multiple streamers (purpled, i believe also feinberg) that twitch rivals games are not tested before being ran. the only testing done was a stress test to see if the server could handle all original 150-some players. this explains why the games are so bad and poorly organized (some games take over an hour, others barely 30 minutes).

the final four are sapnap, shadoune, sneegsnag, and i think feinberg. it's the most anticlimatic game of connect 4 you can imagine. sneeg eliminates sapnap, and shadoune eliminates fein. notably, fein's game glitches during a throw, which despite being obviously a glitch, the coordinators brush off as being "part of the game". fein and multiple other streamers spend time analyzing every pov frame by frame and all agree that yeah, that was a glitch. shadoune and sneeg are left for the finals. they come to an agreement that this is stupid and a horrible event. tired of this bullshit, they purposefully stall the games and run a podcast for approximately 2 hours, forcing the coordinators to bend to their commands hunger games-style. essentially since the first glitch of the day people were begging twitch to just split the money, something that wouldn't be easy according to tubbo, because everything is pre-signed and delegated before the event. sneeg and shadoune give no fucks, and force the coordinators to split the money anyway, winning the day through the power of friendship. i cannot stress enough how no one wanted to fucking be there by the end of all this.

[sharkieboi]

made a deal with an aberration thing in DnD tonight and I don’t think either the DM or the other players were expecting my character to accept so that was fun on all fronts

[jonnywaistcoat]

Hi Jonny, if you don't mind I have a question about the TMA TTRPG! So I noticed that on the player's guide there's this guy, who my friends and I assumed is probably Jon. If it is him, is this a canon design, or more like some of the non-canon stuff that's in the merch?

So, I hope you don't mind if i use this ask to go a bit off on one. I'm not specifically dragging you (I'm actualy glad you asked, as I've thinking about posting on the topic), but all the discussion around the RPG art and how "official" or "canon" it might be is, to my mind, slightly silly.

First up, is it "official" art? I mean, yeah, its art for the officially licenced Magnus Archives RPG. This means Monte Cook Games have commissioned someone to do a beatiful illustration broadly based on some aspect, episode or character from the podcast and it goes in the book. But that's kinda all it means. "Official" is a legal distinction, not an artistic one. The fact that it's in an official product doesn't make it any less one artist's cool interpretation of a character that has only been vaguely described in audio.

Second, is it Jonathan Sims the Archivist? I mean, it's probably based on the idea of him, but it's certainly not set in stone. When we were first discussing art with MCG, we advised that character pictures be more vibes-based and not explicitly tied to specific people (ie. a portrait inspired by Tim wouldn't be captioned "This is Tim" and wouldn't be placed opposite a profile for Tim Stoker, archival assistant.) This was mainly because we wanted the artists to have plenty of freedom to interpret and not feel too tied down by the need to know everything about the podcast. But, to be frank, it was also because we know that there are a few fans out there that are kinda Not Chill about what they've personally decided these characters look like and can get a bit defensive over depictions that differ.

It strikes me as particularly strange to be having this discussion about art that's for a roleplying game book. Something that's explicitly and solely designed to give you the ability to play in your version of the Magnus universe. The idea that this is the thing where we'd for some reason try to immutably establish unchangable appearances for these characters would be pretty funny if some folks weren't taking it so seriously. Similarly ridiculous is the idea we could reasonably have said to MCG "We'd love for you to make a huge beautiful RPG book of our setting... Just make sure you don't depict any of the iconic characters or events from it!"

But... is it "canon"? Now, to my mind, this highlights a real weakness in a lot of fandom thinking around "canon", which is that it generally has no idea what to do with adaptations. All adaptation is interpretation, and relies on taking a work and letting new creatives (and sometimes the same ones) have a different take on it. Are the appearances of the Fellowship of the Ring in the LOTR movies "canon"? How much, if at all, does that matter? Neil Gaiman's book Neverwhere was originaly a 90s BBC series made with a budget of 50 pence; is anyone who makes fanart of Mr Croup that doesn't look like the actor Hywel Bennet breaking canon? What about the novel that describes the character differently? Or the officially licenced Neverwhere comic where he looks like neither of them? Which is his "canon appearance"?

Canon is an inherently messy concept, and while it is useful for a creative team trying to keep continuity and consistency within a creative work, for thinking about anything beyond that it tends to be more hinderance than help.

Anyway, all this is to say that the above picture and all the others in the RPG are exactly as canon as every other picture you've ever seen of the Archivist.

[julietsbody]

thirsty — coriolanus + reader : the capitol’s star player, golden boy, coriolanus snow had an odd obsession with the water girl, and what other liquids she could provide for him. 

tags : MDNI! 18+!! soccer ! tbosas au, bimbo ! reader,  squirtingggggggggggg!!!!!!!!!!!!!, fingering, pussy play, nicknames (dollface, various barbies, princess), filthy filthy stuff fr, might be a SLIGHTTTT piss kink fic, princess / special treatment, overstimulation, public sex (semi but still), voyeurism 

a / n : AND BOY I I FANTASIZE ABOUT IT ALL THE TIME IF U WERE MINE ID GIVE THIS PUSSY TO U 9-5 5-9 

the heat in panem was enough to dehydrate someone who drinks water daily in seconds, coriolanus waves a clipboard he had taken from casca in front of his face, trying to earn some cool air from it. to nobody’s surprise, the water girl had come bouncing in with your pink kitten heels, short white skirt, and pink tank top that your tits were practically spilling out of. 

your hair was pulled back into some slick back ponytail, with of course, a ribbon tied around the base of the ponytail. you always looked so perfect, makeup barely budging against the strong heat as you came waltzing in. 

you were a fan favorite of the team’s, so sejanus and festus’ heads immediately snap from the soccer ball they they were dribbling to you now. sejanus’ eyes light up immediately, waving to you, “hey!” 

you offer him a barbie - like smile, waving back with your freshly manicured nails, “hihi, sejanus! it’s sooooooo hot.” 

sejanus smiles sweetly as he approaches you, “made sure the water was cold today?” 

he’s teasing you of a time the heat was this bad and you forgot to add ice to the bucket holding the waters. you cried that day, many times. coriolanus found you having a sobbing fit in the hallway, repeating to yourself that you were so stupid. coriolanus was never good with affection, but he gave you a small hug that day, and assured you it didn’t matter at all. 

and when festus called you a dumb bitch for it? 

coriolanus made it his priority to fuck festus up on that field that day, and good lord, he did. 

festus was ushered off with a broken wrist because of a move coriolanus made, and coriolanus was taken off with a red card and a proud smirk on his face. now festus and coriolanus are never allowed on the same field, no matter what. which was good, because festus was a mediocre player, whilst coriolanus has a record for most man of the match’s won. 

you pout at him, “not funny, sej.” 

he chuckles, eyes softening at you as he tips his head in your vision, “‘m jus’ messing with you, sweet girl, water is water regardless of temperature, yeah?” 

sejanus and coriolanus were both always reassuring you, always so sweet with you despite their cold exteriors, despite the fact that they’re the most sought after players, they never let that ego get to them. 

well… sejanus didn’t. 

coriolanus did sometimes. speak of the devil, snow moves to bump into sejanus’ shoulder, offering him a toothy grin with his sharp canines. sejanus glares at him, like he was interrupting something special, “how are you in such a good mood when you were just whining over the heat?” 

coriolanus ignores sejanus’ obvious attempts to embarrass him to impress you, his blue eyes locking onto you with a whistle, “hey, malibu barbie.” 

you playfully roll your eyes at him, “you can’t just call me a different barbie every time you see me.” 

“yeah?” his jaw ticks, eyeing you up and down, god, he loved the way your short skirt rides up your thighs, the way your tits bounce through that practically see - through tank top, “why not?” 

“i don’t like it,” you pout at him. 

sejanus nods along, “yeah, snow, she doesn’t like it.” 

coriolanus sighs at him, pinching the bridge of his nose, “you’re such a cuck, dude.” 

he smirks at your ( ꩜ ᯅ ꩜;) expression due to his words, truly not understanding what he means by calling sejanus a cuck— was he stopping him from something? 

you blink dumbly at them, and coriolanus only shrugs, turning to stride past a silent festus. 

sejanus scoffs, “can’t believe he gets away with shit like that.” 

you frown at him, “he’s probably having a rough day— or like… ‘m not sure, you know how he is, sej.” 

“yeah, yeah,” sejanus watches as his cleats sink into the grass, “pretty sure he has a huge crush on you, too.” 

ㅤ˚₊‧ ꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

PANEM 6-2 DISTRICT 2 

as soon as the match was over, coriolanus came up to you, sweat causing his platinum hair to stick to his forehead as he takes a cold water bottle from your hands, fingers brushing against yours. 

he takes a sip from it before leaning in to tower over you, “you saw that bicycle kick?” 

you nod at him excitedly, “i did! you’re soo good, coriolanus.” 

he rolls his tongue along his teeth, “yeah? you think so?” 

you smile sweetly at him with more nods as he walks past to the locker - room, sejanus moving to wrap his arm around coriolanus’ shoulders, to be honest, sejanus should be thanked for coriolanus’ bicycle kick because he’s the reason the ball was even at a level for coriolanus to kick it— but will coriolanus ever admit that? 

of course not! 

in fact, coriolanus doesn’t even think of all his achievements this match even when everyone is patting him on the back, dumping their water bottles on him and leaving him even more drenched than he was before. but with all this water, he just can’t stop thinking of you. 

that expression on your face earlier, plump lips parted in shock, he wonders how well they would wrap around his cock— 

@csnow18 : hey you busy

@csnow18 : ? 

you pluck out your phone as soon as it buzzes, only to see a message from coriolanus, on instagram. he had your number.. why didn’t he… honestly, you knew better than to question him at this point. 

@princess101 : no.. why? 

@csnow18 : im really thirsty 

@princess101 : just gave u water ‎‎໒꒰ྀི -᷅ ⤙ -᷄ ꒱ྀིა 

@csnow18 : festus took it from me 

a lie. 

@csnow18 : come to the locker room? 

@princess101 : rolling my eyes at u rn

@princess101 : u owe me 

@princess101 : and stop letting festus take stuff from u!!!!!!!! 

this wasn’t the first time he has lied about festus taking his water bottle just to see you, but it was the first he had different intentions for when he saw you. 

he already knows you’re coming before you’re even there, mostly because he can hear the click! clack! of your heels, but also because of the whistles of the people passing by you. coriolanus hated how people immediately turned to drooling animals when they saw you, it wasn’t of jealousy but rather possessiveness, because can he really blame them? 

his eyes light up when he sees you, pushing his soaked hair back, “tropical splash barbie.” 

you pout at him, putting your hands on your hips, “how do you even know so many barbies?” 

he shrugs simply, “because i see one every day.” 

you sigh, moving to push a water bottle to his chest, “happy?” 

“hey,” he leans in closer, fingers wrapping around the bottle, “why’re you actin’ like that?” 

“‘m not acting like anything,” you lie, “just don’t get thirsty again.” 

as soon as you spin on your heel to walk away, he clicks his tongue disappointedly, “you know… i don’t know if this water is g’na keep me hydrated enough.” 

you blink at the floor, what? what… “what?”

you turn back around to meet his eyes, watching his pupils immediately dilate at the way your skirt barely shows your panties whenever you twirl around, “do you just serve water, princess?” 

you stare at him dumbly, “i don’t get it—“ 

“you don’t?” he takes a step closer, “i see the way you look at me, doll, always watching when i make a goal, cheering me on, purposefully bouncing up and down so your panties show and your tits nearly pop out that shirt.” 

it was true. all so fucking true. the entire team was so, so attractive, especially coriolanus— you don’t ever wear things for men, but the men of panem’s soccer team? your own dress - code is practically the tightest, most slutty clothes ever! 

“i…” you pause, lips shimmering from your lip - gloss, “i do have other juices.” 

his tongue rolls along the inside of his teeth, tights curling upwards ever so slightly, “think i might need those, dollface.” 

you nod at him, “but— not here.” 

he hums, moving to drop the water bottle onto the ground as he leans in closer and closer until his lips are buzzing against your cheek, “yes, here.” 

you can’t help but melt into his touch as he peppers kisses along your face, pecking against your lips until his kisses drop down to run along your neck. your nails rake up his arms ever so gently, “people will catch us..” 

“mm - mm,” he disagrees, “all showerin’, jus’ let me get hydrated, yeah?” 

 he’s quick to move to his knees, smiling whenever he catches a glimpse of you looking around to see if anyone’s coming as his fingers trace along your thighs, lips following along after them. you’re so paranoid, god, for such a dumb slut, you really didn’t want to get caught. 

he hikes your skirt up to catch a glimpse of your panties, pastel red, to match the team’s colors and oh— oh what’s this? on the right side near your hip, it’s his player number, 18, with a heart surrounding it. he gawks up at you, chuckling at the reason for you always wanting to show off your panties, you had already marked him on them. 

you shyly hide your face, trying to ignore him until his finger presses against the wet spot of your panties left by your cunt. you shiver under his touch, “been wet for me all day, hm?” 

you nod at him, fingers moving to faintly cover your mouth, “always wanted you, corio..” 

he presses a sweet kiss to your inner thigh, before hooking a finger on your delicate panties and tugging them down, “you wrote my number on all your panties?” 

you continue nodding, shivering when his fingers lightly graze along your cunt, “mhm.. sej— sej.. is on some, too.” 

“that so? maybe i should get him out here to fuck you, too,” he presses his thumb against your clit, watching your hips buck ever so slightly, lashes fluttering. 

you shake your head, “n-no.. not now— want.. just you.” 

he moves to push your legs apart with his free hand, moving his hand on your clit out of the way so he can finally dive in. his tongue is quick to lick a stripe up your cunt, lips wrapping around your clit and taking it in his mouth to suck on with ease. 

your fingers move to his head, nails threading through his wet hair as you bite on the fingers of your free hand, trying so hard to not make any noise but gosh, the feeling of his mouth on you was just too much. 

his hand runs up your thigh, holding you stable as his mouth completely devours your cunt, not offering you any remorse as your hips jerk against nothing, teeth sinking past layers of your skin to muffle your whines. 

it’s not long before his hand is sliding from your thigh to your cunt as his lips move back up to your clit, ever so slowly sliding two of his fingers inside of your soaked entrance. you took his fingers so well, velvet walls pulsing around flesh and bone, tightening around him like he was a lifeline. 

your grip on his hair immediately becomes lethal, babbling nonsense against your finger, “corio— co..corio… ‘ts too much— ‘m gonna..” 

that was coriolanus’ cue, his fingers immediately curl into you and he starts moving them back and forth so his fingers are repeatedly penetrating that spongey spot that makes your eyes roll back. you tug at his hair as the sounds of his fingers moving inside of you become wet squelching, a familiar feeling washing over you but with a tinge of something different. 

it felt like an orgasm but no— no, it was wetter than an orgasm, because now his hand was completely drenched in your wetness, his lips moved to a part so it could spray into his mouth. it was so, so filthy, the way he gulped it down, and made you squirt again, and again, and again. 

you were like a fountain of nectar that he just couldn’t get enough of. 

you were so fucked out that you didn’t realize you were cuming again until your body is wracked with another orgasm, gushing all over his fingers and into his mouth once more. you whimper above him, silently begging for mercy as he continues to pump his fingers into your overstimulated pussy, “corio— please.. too much— can’t..” 

he licks the remaining juices from his lips as he finally pulls his fingers out, lapping up the cum and other substances dripping off of his skin. he takes a grip of your hips to stabilize you as he stands, pressing a soft kiss to your cheek. “thank you, dollface, such a good water girl.” 

your lips part to speak but you’re interrupted by the clearing of a throat. 

your eyes immediately snap to the side, only to find.. 

“sejanus?”  

[ghostgirl101]

Hi!! Loved your post about Oliver Quick being obsessed. How about Farleigh being obsessed with you 👁️👁️👁️

Dating Farleigh Start Would Be Like This...

A/N: Pffft his face here is a whole mood 😭 I got a similar request for Felix too, so he's next 🙃 Dating headcanons coming right up, with a side order of freaking obsessive, naturally:

⚜️• I don't know what to say about this guy that isn't already shown in the pic 😏 he's a cocky, rude, arrogant flirtatious player who takes every opportunity and advantage to use to his best. Once something's caught his attention, it'll play on his mind and he'll get to it in his own way, because that's the Farleigh Start we know and love.

⚜️• You'll meet him at Oxford, maybe hanging out around his friends with Felix and the rest, maybe not. I think he'd be very much drawn to someone who's not like the girls he sees always running after Felix or trying to make him jealous when they don't have his attention. You be you, and when he uses a very bold and seemingly smooth line on you, give him a look of amusement and slight confusion, and he'll be stunned that you didn't fall all over him for his charms like he's used to.

⚜️• Farleigh just watches you leave for a solid minute in bewilderment and intrigue because the guy got kicked out of every school because of how he is, but apparently, you're not that easy? This is new...?

⚜️• Don't think Farleigh's just some rich prick playboy who has to pick on the smarter kids to stay in college though, because he's surprisingly smart, which wouldn't be a first guess based on the way he acts around people and mocks anyone who isn't anywhere in his circle of friends and social class with Felix. If you saw him reviewing essays and stuff with Oliver and the teacher near the beginning of the movie, you can see he knows his terminology and how to study to get good enough grades in class. The only reason he kept getting kicked out of schools was for messing around with the teachers. It's not like Farleigh's stupid, not at all, but there's no way he's going to work harder than he has to... which isn't that hard at all.

⚜️• So when he saunters over to you yet again with his familiar arrogant smirk and charm, offering you a drink while his eyes unsubtly trail up and down your figure in intrigue, and you smile in amusement and casually turn him down... 😑😐 (his face) and then realises that okay, he might have to work harder than he usually does, because there's something about you that's made him curious, Farleigh has to rethink for a second before trying to get you to tag along with him and his friends more often.

⚜️• If Felix doesn't ask you over to Saltburn for the holidays, Farligh will nag at him to do it, with seemingly no other reason than "you're hot" and "why not have a new face?" and whatever else he thinks up on the spot that's half earnest and true, and also because a big manor out in the country with private gardens is just the perfect place to take this person he's been mildly obsessing over for the past while to draw them in... Felix, say yes now, because boy won't take no for an answer.

⚜️• During the course of your stay and hanging out around Farleigh, you'll come to realise that he's actually not a total jackass and snob that fools around with any girl he thinks is hot enough. His ties with the Cattons are pretty fragile and complex, and there's a lot more to him than he'll ever really show. There's a lot of pressure in fitting in and matching Saltburn's aesthetic and definition, but if you're someone who's not completely used to all the wealth and standards and makes him feel more relaxed and accepted without a facade everyone seems to wear, you'll see more and more of what makes Farleigh, Farleigh.

⚜️• So well done to him for discovering that there's more to an aspiring relationship than just the sex and passion, there's communication and actually getting to know each other too 👏

⚜️• As you get properly closer, you'll see that the dude gets ridiculously jealous when any other guy or girl shows an interest in you that goes past platonic in his eyes. He's started arguments and fights before about lesser things, so don't think he won't tense up and his eyes won't narrow into an annoyed glare at whoever it is that's taking up too much of your time. Farleigh will probably finish it off by humiliating them in some way, smirking in amusement from his seat as he watches his efforts pay off, and shrug with a faux innocent look when you call him out on it.

⚜️• If Oliver Quick happens to be Felix's guest at Saltburn too, Farleigh's jealousy levels and possessiveness will spike too, along with a hint of protectiveness. Since he basically thought right from the beginning that there was something weird about Oliver - maybe not to the realistic point that's revealed, but enough to not have one friendly or lighthearted word for him - Oliver going to you for friendship or most likely something more will only motivate Farleigh to exclude him as much as he can from the rest of the group.

⚜️• I feel like Farleigh would grow to quickly love what it means to be in a committed and official relationship, when before he turned his nose up at the idea of being restrained to only one person instead of a fling, and not having to worry about telling each other things that go too deep. It seems to all come naturally with you, and he loves it; being a loud and gleefully obnoxious supporter when you're doing whatever club or sport or anything at all with half a crowd watching from the sidelines. Proud, smug boyfriend right in the front row taking an unnecessary amount of photos to put up on a wall in his room.

⚜️• Farleigh makes simping look good. 😎

⚜️• He'll take advantage of the money he gets to buy you as expensive things as he can get, smirking proudly when he remembers you talking about something you like to get you. Farleigh can absolutely be romantic if he tries, mostly when you're alone and he makes sure he's the first one to tell you he loves you, it'll be surprisingly heartfelt and sweet and vulnerable, and then you've officially, one hundred per cent, seen Farleigh Start for everything he really is, which isn't all bad at all.

⚜️• Big-time pda, and if you're not into that, tell him now, right now, because he's fairly shameless and won't think twice before showing off to his friends by making out with you at uncalled moments, or being more subtle and sweet by having his arm naturally around your shoulders when you're watching a movie or at some social event. Big handholder as well; walking to and from class, alone, in public, doesn't make a difference to him.

⚜️• His jealousy factors into his affection outside sometimes, not that he doesn't trust you, but Farleigh definitely isn't the only player around, and when you're at Saltburn with Felix, he might find himself being frustratedly insecure that you'll be drawn to him because... well, it's Felix, and everyone loves Felix. So when you show that you're not interested at all and it's Farleigh you're dating, duh, he'll chill out a bit after being clingy for a day or two.

⚜️• I will say that even though I don't write smut, it's gotta be obvious that you'll have more than enough going on behind closed doors, because it's Farleigh, and he likes you a lot, so... yeah, brace yourself 😏

⚜️• All I'm gonna say, though, is watch out for Oliver Quick, who's most likely watching it all with that familiar longing and envy of having such a close and strong relationship with someone beautiful and unique, who seems to fit in with the rest of the family just by being you. He's going to. want it, really want it, and whether he gets it or not is a matter of luck and dark fate.

[goldenlikedayl1ght]

born to die - m. murdock

a/n: IM NOT DEAD i am very busy with finals but this has been rattling around the old noggin for a while now. i took a lot of inspiration from @ellephlox 's fic strawberry rhubarb which i 100% reccomend bc its better than most fics including this one! hope you enjoy! as always reblogs and comments are always appreciated! <3 warnings: oh boy. torture (cutting, burning) some sexually suggestive talk (nothing happens but it's not consensual) readers dad abused her, nightmares, lots of major character death (but not permeant) ANGST!!! but with a happy ending! kidnapping, medical stuff, cursing, and if i missed anything, let me know! word count: 4.8k summary: as matt murdock's wife, your life is rather full of surprises. getting kidnapped by wilson fisk takes the cake as the worst one. pairing: matt murdock x wife!reader now playing: born to die - lana del rey "choose your last words, this is the last time/'cause you and i, we were born to die"

You would think after patching him up too many times to count, five years without him, and countless sleepless nights worrying if he was alive, you would think you’d be used to Matt Murdock and his world of surprises.

And then you get kidnapped, so maybe you’re not so immune to surprises.

It’s really such a shame too, because you’re storming out of the apartment, too angry to take notice of your surroundings.

Silly, foolish, ditzy you.

Because it isn’t like Matt hasn’t told you time and time again that you need to be careful, especially when you go out alone at night. But he’s so angry that he doesn’t even think about the potential dangers of Hell’s Kitchen at three a.m. when Daredevil has been tucked away for the night and Matt Murdock comes back out to play.

He’s been taking more and more patrols because with Fisk being out of prison he can’t help but be constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop.

How silly he was to think that maybe he could have it all—A successful law firm, good friends and a loving wife.

Silly, foolish, ditzy Matt.

But after a week of nonstop patrols, you’re both fed up and tired, and above all, you’re yearning for each other. Neither of you allow yourselves to be totally happy all the time. It would just make everything too easy.

So, after yelling at each other over, what? Patrols? Cases? Burnt dinners? You’re freezing on the streets, and you get about five blocks before you stop and rub your eyes.

This is dumb, you rationalize. Of course, you’re both stressed out and tired, but you’ve gotten through rougher times before, and you both made an oath. To each other, in front of his God, to love each other no matter what.

You realize you left your wedding ring on the table, the ghost of the metal around your finger haunting you. You were dumb for leaving and Matt was dumb for telling you to go. You’re made for each other.

You turn around to go back to your shared apartment, and then, someone grabs you from behind. Your first instinct is to yell for your husband, but you don’t get the chance to before you’re knocked out, by what you can only guess to be a gun or maybe a large fist.

• • •

You wake up in this dingy room, the lighting not suitable for much of anything except to make you afraid. The set up is almost comical and in a fucked up away, stereotypical for a kidnapping. You’re tied up to a chair, and the lights shine only bright enough so you can see shadows and rats scurrying along.

The air is this weird musk of salt and earth, and you realize you’re near the docks, and that’s about all you know about your current location.

Your head is still pounding from whatever it was you were hit with, but you can see another chair a few feet from you and a wooden table with various weapons laying on it. You don’t feel good about this one. Also on the table is an old school record player. You have no idea what the intention is with it.

You try to keep your cool, knowing that wherever you wander, your husband will not be very far off. That whatever is happening, he will be coming to find you no matter how upset he is for whatever it was you were fighting about earlier.

And then, out of the shadows, there he is. 

But he’s too big to be Matt, and he has a man standing next to him.

Frank, maybe?

And then you realize who this man is.

He’s Wilson Fisk, the kingpin who has done nothing but torture and kill people, shoving it in Matt’s face for years. Matt only met you after Fisk was put back in prison, and you know at some point in the five-year blip without Matt, he had escaped prison.

So, this is the first time you’ve had the pleasure of meeting Mr. Fisk. When he meets your eye, you do nothing but stare.

“Good evening, Mrs. Murdock. It’s a shame we must meet under these circumstances.” He tells you, taking a seat in front of you. His henchman stands behind the chair.

“It’s regretful to say the least.” You tell him, not intending to make any more of an enemy out of him than Matt already has, not right now.

“I wanted to congratulate you on your wedding. I remember my own, it was a rather special day.”

You know that was the day Matt took him down. The night that he, Karen and Foggy took him down.

“I’ve heard stories. It seemed like a lovely day.”

“You’re a much more gracious guest than your counterpart.”

“Well, I’m sure people say similar things about you and yours.”

He seems to consider this for a moment before nodding.

“You’re probably right about that, Mrs. Murdock. I wanted to tell you I’m terribly sorry these are the circumstances in which we are finally introduced. But it seems Mr. Murdock has been interested in finding out more about my endeavors. And you see, we simply cannot have that. I made a promise not to hurt Miss Page or Mr. Nelson but it seems you were not included in that deal.” Of course not, it had been a long time before you showed up. “So, you’re how we’re going to send Mr. Murdock a message.”

Huh.

So, this is how you die.

Well, you might as well go out with a bang.

“You see, Mrs. Murdock, When I was a boy—”

“I’m going to stop you, Mr. Fisk, because your sob story is rather dull. I know who you are. You were beaten by your father, just like I was. The difference is that I don’t use that as an excuse to murder my way to the top of the food chain. And you can torture me, assault me, whatever you feel you need to do. But if you think for a second that I’ll forget who’s coming to stop you, you are sorely mistaken. And if you think he’ll ever stop trying to find me, you do not know my husband very well.”

Fisk stares at you for a while, his gaze hardening into a glare.

“You’re right. You do know who I am. Because we’re rather similar.” He stands up and nods to the man nearby. “If Murdock can hear her far from here, make sure he hears her screaming.”

Then Wilson Fisk walks away, and you are left with the sickening gaze of a man who has no good intentions.

 The man goes to the record player and starts to play a song you recognize quickly as “Fly Me To The Moon” by Frank Sinatra. As he does this, he speaks,

“Hello, Mrs. Murdock. I’m John.” You stay quiet, and he just enjoys the song.

He picks up a knife from the table and goes to you, this grin on his face that makes you sick.

But you remember a trick from not only your childhood, but also from Frank who told you the key to remaining strong under torture—Distraction.

You stare straight ahead, trying not to mind as the man runs the knife over your skin. You think about Matt. You imagine him in his wedding suit, the smile he had on as you approached him down that aisle. You think about when he asked you to marry him, and—

A sharp pain slashes down your arm, cutting open the shirt you’re wearing. You yell in pain, before moving in to try and take deep breaths.

You can do this. Matt will be here soon.

You continue to breathe through the anxiety and the pain, trying not to think too hard about when John hums along to Sinatra’s voice, guiding his knife around your skin. Another cut finds itself on your shoulder.

This goes on for a while, with the classic song looping over and over again. John never seems to tire of it, no matter how badly you will for it to end. As the song ends in one particularly good loop, John hits your face hard, and your nose starts bleeding.

You try to think of Matt’s voice. You don’t listen to John’s torments, knowing it will only egg him on further. You just want him to burn at that point.

By the end of… Countless Frank Sinatra serenades, you have cuts littered around your body, dry blood on your face from your nose and tears running down your face. When he’s eventually done, two men cut you out from the chair and drag you along to a smaller, darker room. You are left in there with a small meal, and you just huddle against a corner, nearest a barred window out of your reach.

And then, you begin to speak for the first time since you saw Fisk.

“Matt,” You whisper, “I’m by the docks.” You tell him, not sure if he can even hear you. “Please, I’m sorry for everything, please just come find me..” You mumble, too tired and aching to try and do more.

• • •

The next day, or what you presume to be the next day since you have no way to tell how much time has passed, you’re woken up by a loud banging on the door of your.. cell..?

The same two men enter and drag you back to the room, where John waits for you.

“How are you feeling today, Mrs. Murdock?” He asks.

You glare.

“Fuck you.”

He laughs and shakes his head.

“What happened to the polite young woman Mr. Fisk and I met yesterday?”

You’re filled with unprecedented anger.

“I said, Fuck you!”

He wastes no time, grabbing a lighter off the table and starting the record player again. Once more, Frank Sinatra’s voice fills the room, and you’re pretty sure once you’re done with John, and then Fisk, you’ll bring Sinatra back from the dead just to kill him again.

You’ve never really been a violent person, but you suspect that it lives in the worst parts of you, just as it did with your own father. You’re much better at keeping it all at bay. Besides, it does you no good to be violent while you have Matt. He’s plenty angry for the both of you.

Oh, Matt..

This is how time passes for you. While John tortures you, burning you or carving into your skin, you think about how great it will be to choke the life out of the singer… And you think about Matt. When you’re in your dark little room, you talk to him. Even if he can’t hear you, you must hope that he’s looking for you.

• • •

Days pass. How long have you been here?

One night, you have the following dream:

It starts out as a memory. A memory of you and Matt. You’re lying in bed with him, and the sunlight is hitting his face just right. You love this memory, it’s one you recall often. He just has this angelic look to him.

Yeah, most people who encounter him, especially at night, meet the devil. But occasionally, you get glimpses of the angel you know he is. He’s sleeping, and you think in this state, he is the most relaxed you’ll ever see him.

Then, before your eyes, the dream shifts and you’re in this black void, on the ground.

Foggy, Karen, Frank, and Matt stand around you. You run to Matt but hit a clear shield keeping him from you. You bang on the glass, well, maybe it’s glass, you don’t know. You try to scream, but your voice never reaches your ears. You begin to look around, looking for a way out.

An eerie version of ‘Fly Me To The Moon’ plays as you glance over to Foggy and watch in horror as his body begins to turn to ash, just like Matt and Karen did when they were blipped. You scream, banging against the shield, but your screams are silent.

You glance back and see the same thing happening to Frank. No, no, no! It was never supposed to happen this way! Frank and Foggy, they lived! They got their time! They don’t die like this!

And then Karen starts too. You start sobbing, not wanting her to go. You had missed her so much, and you only just got her back. But soon enough, she’s gone too, and you’re left in front of your husband.

His hand comes up to rest on the forcefield and he frowns softly.

He says your name gently, and then adds, “You know it couldn’t last forever, right?”

And then just as quickly as before, he is gone again. You remain there in that void, sobbing and screaming though no noise reaches you. This can’t be it! You just got him back, you needed him! You couldn’t take being alone for another five years… Or more…

The dream transforms and you’re in this grand ballroom. People are dancing elegantly and you’re in this.. obnoxious ball gown. But across the room, you can see Matt. He’s dressed in an all-black suit, with a red masquerade mask covering his face. The mask has little red devil horns on it.

Now, the orchestra plays their rendition of Sinatra’s romantic classic. And you step towards Matt, attempting to make your way towards him, only to be met with a masked man, beginning to twirl you around.

You jump from man to man, until eventually, you’re dancing with a man in an all-white suit, a man you quickly recognize as Fisk. No matter how hard you try to escape his grasp, he holds on tighter. The two of you stop dancing now, amid the crowd of moving bodies.

Fisk grabs your chin and tilts it in Matt’s direction, just in time for you to see him bowing to another woman, kissing the back of her hand. Your eyes widen and you think, this can’t be real.

“When I kill you,” Fisk says, “He’ll move on. You’re easily replaceable, Mrs. Murdock.”

And then, in an instant, the woman with Matt pulls out a dagger and plunges it deeply into his abdomen. It’s then that the other dancers, besides you, Fisk, Matt, and this mystery woman, disappear. Matt turns to you and falls to his knees, clutching his stomach.

He tries to crawl to you, blood seeping onto his hands and the beautiful ballroom floor. He yells your name, and the woman stabs him again from behind, and you watch as your husband dies. You hear him screaming, hear him yelling your name. But Wilson Fisk keeps you in place. You can do nothing but watch as Matt Murdock meets his end again, unable to save him. You start to scream, thrashing against Fisk, ready to claw your way to Matt.

You wake up screaming, the nightmare haunting you. A guard bangs on your door, yelling at you to keep it down.

It was just a nightmare, you tell yourself. Maybe Matt heard your screams.

Maybe he’s already dead.

You force yourself not to listen to the voice in your head that says that.

• • •

One day, Fisk visits again, only this time, He’s covered in blood. That damn song is still playing.

You just stare. They have long since stopped tying you up, recognizing that you no longer have the energy to try and fight back.  He has this sick grin on his face.

“Good evening, Mrs. Murdock.” You say nothing. “Have you been enjoying your stay with us?”

You glare.

“I hope Matt kills you when he gets here, because it will be a lot less painful for you if he does it instead of me.”

Mr. Fisk just laughs at this and tosses something at your feet. You get down off the chair to see what it is.

Your face goes pale with realization. You pick it up and slip it on your thumb, with it being too big for your other fingers. Matt’s wedding ring. You know it’s his, it has your name engraved in braille on the inside. How did he get this?

As if reading your mind, Fisk speaks again. “I took it off his body after I killed him.”

Your head shoots up to him. What did he say?

“No.” You deny. “Fuck off, I don’t—I don’t believe you.”

“Your husband is dead, Mrs. Murdock. I killed him with my bare hands because he was stupid enough to come after you. Your friends will mourn you and Matt Murdock for a while, and the city will come to the realization that Daredevil did nothing but harm. I win, Mrs. Murdock.”

You feel tears start to fill your eyes, and you realize, no. He hasn’t won because you’re still alive.

Maybe not for long, but you are.

You gather the rest of your energy and leap up, lunging at the large man covered in the man you love’s blood. And there’s a part of you that gets it. Okay, universe, you win. Most people don’t get a second chance like the two of you did. And now he’s dead, and soon you will be too. You can at least try to kill Fisk.

But you barely get a scratch in, yelling and screaming obscenities at him, as John grabs your arms from behind pulling you away. Fisk laughs and shakes his head again.

“It’s been lovely knowing you, Mrs. Murdock. I’m sorry you’ll have to die, you had so much potential. John, when you’re done doing whatever you’d like to her, kill her.” You hear him say it, but you’re blinded by rage, by grief.

John laughs behind you and forces you back into the chair, tying you back up once more. He looks at you, enraged and grief stricken, and just shakes his head.

“You and I are going to have a lot of fun.”

He leaves for a few minutes, and you realize this is the first time you’ve been left alone in this room. You tug at the knots and realize that while John is a gifted torturer, he’s not much of a knot tier.

So you manage to wiggle out of the rope, approaching the table in front of you. You don’t have much time. Okay, maybe you won’t be able to kill Fisk, but John will do. You take a golf club off the table in front of you and turn to the record player.

You begin to smash the thing in, angrily cursing at it as Frank Sinatra’s voice fades off into nothing. When the song ends, the lights turn off. And then, red flood lights turn on in their place.

A back up generator. Lovely. You think that your smashing of the record player couldn’t possibly make the whole building’s power go off, but you don’t really care at that moment.

You’re tired. You won’t make it far, but you need to try. You grasp the club and open the door, being greeted with a man you don’t recognize. You smack him in the face with the club hard enough for him to fall to the ground.

The red lighting adds an eerie tone to the hallways as you creep around, concussing various henchmen that Fisk has working for him. You don’t mean to kill these ones, only John.

But you’re running out of stamina, peeking around corners. And that’s when you see him. John is just standing there like he knows you’re there.

“Come out to play, Mrs. Murdock?” He calls, approaching the corner where you are waiting on the other side.

You focus on his footsteps, taking a swing around the corner when you know he’s close enough. You hear a sharp crack! As he falls, and you can’t see the blood in this lighting. Good. You begin to hit his head in, sobs mixing with yelling. You hate him. You want him to die before you’re killed.

But you don’t get the pleasure, because a pair of arms are pulling you off him, and you begin yelling.

“No!” You yelp. “No, Fuck you! Let go of me! Stop!” You think it’s another one of his goons, and you just want to be able to finish the job before you die. The figure forces you to drop the club. “Please, stop, don’t hurt me—”

But he’s saying your name and turning you around to see him. You know that voice.

“Sweetheart, hey, it’s just me—” He pants, his hands going to your cheeks. “It’s me, It’s just me. I’ve got you.”

And you can’t believe your eyes.

“Matt..?” You whimper, not able to believe it. “No, you’re dead, this has to be—”

And then, Matt does something he wouldn’t do for anyone who wasn’t his wife. He pulls off his helmet so you can see his face. Oh.

“I’m right here. I’ve got you.” He says softly, his thumb gently rubbing against your skin.

That’s when you start to sob, falling against him, no energy left to carry yourself. His arms wrap around you, and you say it again.

“He told me you were dead..”

“I know.. I’m sorry, I don’t know how he got my ring but we’ve gotta get you out of here.” He tells you.

You’re so tired. You’re slumping against him as you try to walk, the warmth radiating off his body just drawing you to sleep.

The last thing you hear before you fall asleep is Matt’s voice, begging you to stay awake.

• • •

You see flashes. Your parents, your dad. Nightmares of Fisk killing Karen, Foggy, Frank, and worst of all, Matt. You see John’s sickening grin on the body of spiders, and you’re chased by his cruel laughter.

But the dreams are filmier compared to what’s happening around you. You know Claire shows up at some point, and you’re thankful to her. Karen sits next to you sometimes, petting your hair, or sometimes it’s Foggy, talking your ear off.

You have fever dreams of Frank in full military gear, tormenting you.

“Not so tough now, huh, girl?” He teases. “You really thought you’d kill the big bad wolf? Solve all your boyfriend’s problems?”  

You say to him, “Husband, He’s my husband.”

• • •

Even in your dreams, where you were slashed and burned aches, and you long for the pain to end.

You wake up only once throughout these dreams, and it’s when Karen is playing music to try and calm you from your insistent nightmares.

Only one song snaps you out of it, and you hear it clear as day.

‘Fly me to the moon,” Sinatra sings, “Let me play among the stars,’

He only gets through a few more lines before you’re sitting up on the couch, screaming.

“No! Stop, please!” You cry, and in an instant, Matt’s arms are around you. “Matt, please, don’t let him hurt me, please! Please don’t die, don’t let him keep hurting me!” You beg, in a hazed, frenzied state.

“I’ve got you, No one’s going to hurt you..”

Karen turns off the music somewhere deep in the apartment.

“No..” You begin to grow tired in his arms again. “Matty, please.. You can’t die, please..” You whimper out, continuing to mumble out pleads as you fall back into your weird dream state.

• • •

You really wake up two days later. Matt’s hand is clasped over yours, and he’s just.. Sitting on the floor next to the couch, praying into your clasped hands.

Praying for what, you don’t know.

Your body aches. But something in you tells you you’re safe.

“Matt…?” You whisper gently, and his head shoots up.

“Hey..” He says softly, one hand leaving yours, coming up to brush your hair out of your face. “There she is..”

“You’re alive..”

He seems a little concerned you still had some doubts about this.

“I am. Fisk lied to you.. He never even touched me.” You nod.

“Did I kill him? The man you found me..”

“No. He’s just in a coma, I checked. He’ll be brought to justice.”

“I only wanted him dead when I thought you were too..” Because really, you would have nothing if Matt wasn’t there. Nothing to live for. When he was blipped away, you had the hardest time readjusting to life. Now you know if he died again, you’d probably go off the rails.

No love story is saved more than once. You used up all your luck. Now it will be doomed if he’s ever killed again.

“I know.” He said gently.

“How long have I been out? How long was I in there?”

“A week, and then you were out for four days here. They got you good, baby..” He says gently. “I’m sorry I didn’t find you earlier.”

You frown softly.

“You did find me though. That’s all that really matters anymore.” You know you’ll be nursing scars for a long time. Physical or not.

“Still..” He said gently, and he brings your hand up to kiss it gently. “And I’m sorry I told you to leave that night. I was just upset, but this past week and half.. I feel like I’ve been going crazy without you. No matter how mad at you I am, I never want to spend another night without holding you. Knowing that you could have been…” His voice breaks, and he just sighs, taking a moment to lean his head on your hand. “I love you, so much.” He kisses your palm again.

How are you so tired again? All you’ve done is talk to him, but it feels like you just ran a marathon.

“I love you. It’s why I married you. Because you and I, we were always meant to be with each other. No matter what.”

He smiles weakly and reaches over to the coffee table to grab something. He slips it on your finger and for the first time in over a week, your wedding ring is back where it belongs. You see Matt is wearing his. Your Matt. Your husband. The only one you were ever meant to be with.

“Did Claire patch me up? I remember her being here..” He nods softly.

“Yeah, we.. we really owe her one. She was a huge help..”

“Karen and Foggy were here… And Frank?”

“No, no, Frank’s still in Illinois, I think?” You nod softly. “You were mumbling to him, though. I heard you… you were telling him you had a husband.”

You would laugh if it didn’t hurt.

“He called you my boyfriend. I had to correct him.” You grin.

“That’s my girl.” He hums. Matt gently lifts you so you can sit up and drink some water. Then, he climbs onto the couch and brings you close. His arms wrap around your freshly wounded skin and you have a rare moment of gratefulness for his blindness.

You sit in silence for a while.

“Do you want to talk about it?” he asks gently.

You think about it all. The torture, the cuts, burns, the small room. Fisk’s laughter, John’s grin. But something sticks out to you.

“Fisk said I was just like him.”

“What?”

“We.. We grew up similar, Matt, I mean.. What if he’s right? What if the only thing separating him and I is one bad move?”

Your husband frowns and shakes his head.

“Sweetheart, you are the.. the most amazing person I’ve ever met. You’re the complete antithesis of Wilson Fisk. Yeah, you grew up like him, but you’re living proof that you don’t have to go down the path he did just because of his background. You and I both know that there will never be a world where you end up like him. Especially not with me.”

You find comfort with his words. Not only did you make every choice not to be like Fisk, but you must’ve also made all the right decisions if in the end, you ended up with Matt. Oh, it won’t be easy, you know that for sure. You’ll never be able to listen to Frank Sinatra, and your upcoming nights are filled with nightmares and hauntings.

But one day you’ll be okay. One day You’ll be able to sit in the silence without thinking about it. One day you’ll get the image of dead Matt out of your head. You’ve spent many nights wondering about who will go first, you or him.

And then you realize the best-case scenario is that the two of you die at the same time, never living another moment without each other.

How would there ever be a world where you and your husband weren’t with each other, even just for a moment?

[lottins-only]

I bet we’d have really good bed chem | aurélien tchouaméni

A/N: i wrote this on a whim lmao but lmk what yall think. inspired by the sabrina carpenter song obvi.

warning: nsfw ig. not full on smut but suggestive stuff

you see him before he does. he’s hard to miss, moving around the party surrounded by a herd of people, as if to not interact with the normies. it makes you roll your eyes. why do famous people have to make such a fuss everywhere they go?

it’s a packed house party that night in Madrid, hosted by some influencer who hangs around the rich and famous. no wonder a couple real madrid players are here. they roll red carpets for them wherever they go in these parts. you, on the other hand, have no business being at the party, but you’d slipped in as a plus one of a plus one. 

now, you’re indulging in all the free drinks, moving your body to whatever beat is playing. you and your friend are dancing together, moving among the mass of hot sweaty bodies. you’re having a time. 

that is, until some asshole steps on your foot, crushing your toes through your open toe heels. 

“Ow!” you yelp, hands flying to your feet. “What the fuck?”

“Oh mon dieu, I’m  sorry” a deep, accented voice says while a firm hand on your arm steadies you. you look up to find its owner, and lo and behold it’s mr. aurelien tchouameni himself, madrid’s resident pretty boy.

he has the audacity to smirk at you while you’re still wincing in pain, dragging his eyes up your sheer black dress languidly. eyes pause at your cleavage before moving up to your face again. you yourself take stock of what’s in front of you; it’s not everyday you see someone so famous, and you gotta admit, so handsome up close. he’s dressed in a white bomber jacket and a pair of dark skinny jeans. that second part alone should’ve given you the ick but his beautiful face makes up for his disastrous fashion sense:  plump, full lips. high cheekbones. jawline that could cut glass. deep brown eyes. he smiles a knowing smile, licking his lips. he knows you think he’s hot, of course he does. 

“what’s your name?” he asks, hand still on your arm.

“y/n” 

“I’m aurelien”

no shit, you think.

you shake hands, eyes locked. 

“pretty name” you say

“pretty face” He says without skipping a beat. you smile involuntarily.

someone shoves past you in that moment, pushing you forward. you try to steady yourself, one hand instinctively landing on his chest. you almost gasp; he might as well have been made with stone the way his muscled chest is hard. you fight every desire you have to move your hand around the ridges of his abs, feel him up a bit.

he smirks again, leaning down close to your ear.

“need a hand or do you just like what you see?” His breath is hot against your neck, making you shiver.

you quickly snatch your hand away, flushing hotly. he caught you red handed, like he read your mind.  when he leans back up his eyes are twinkling with mischief. bitch, you think.

“y/n, do you want to –”

he’s interrupted by one of his people whispering in his ear. He turns to you, apologetic again. 

“give me your phone” He says. when you just give him a confused look, he takes the device out of your hand and deftly puts in his contact details, sliding the phone back into your palm in seconds. your breath hitches at the feeling of your fingers touching. 

“i have to go” he says, then looks down at your feet. “sorry again”

he winks, flashing you a smile. then he’s gone. you shift to the side as his entourage moves, trying to avoid getting trampled on again. 

you stay up a little later that night, staring at his contact on your phone, wishing you’d been the one to give him your number so he could reach out first. no one left you tongue tied like that, but the thing is, he’s so hot. So, here you are.  

a couple days go by and your friend lets you know that the person who invited her to party reached out asking for your instagram. apparently, a friend of that person's friend met you at the party and wanted to connect. your friend asks if its ok to pass along your handle, and you hesitantly say yes, hoping, wishing, it's him and not some rando you don't remember meeting.

you get the notification on instagram that night: aurelientchm has requested to follow you!

you wait an hour to accept his request, and his message is instant: what does a guy have to do to get a text from you?

you type back: not step on my feet for starters 

touché, he responds within seconds.  you keep texting, flirting. you find you have a lot of the same tastes in music, movies, and also the same humor, so it’s pretty easy to make conversation. another week goes by and you start texting daily and even sending each other voice notes . you try to meet up, but it never works out: you’re either swamped with work, or he’s busy with training or off at an away match. 

not in your timezone, but I wish I was :(  he texted once when you proposed meeting but he was abroad for a champions league game.

the trouble starts when you open his instagram live one night. there he is in his home gym, your breath hitching at the sight of him. shirtless and glistening with sweat, he moves along to the beat of the music, mouthing the words to the french rap playing. his chest is sculpted and chiseled, pecs and abs defined. his shoulders, broad and powerful, lead down to a narrow waist. you watch as he goes through his routine, mouth slightly agape and heart racing  as your eyes track his every movement, his every flex of muscle. then it’s over. the notification saying the live ended interrupts your almost drooling. 

you toss and turn in your sleep during the night. the way he moved, his beautiful body, it was all stuck in your head. you can’t help it, you think about him touching you. those deep brown eyes giving you bedroom eyes.  how he’d pick you up, pull down your panties, flip you around. You can hear his deep accented voice murmuring sweet nothings while his head is buried in between your legs. you imagine how he’d look hovering above you, that damn silver chain dangling down between you two. would he have the same concentrated look he had at the gym when he’s inside you? eyebrows furrowed, biting his lip, forehead glistening with sweat? you’d move together in a steady rhythm, your hands clinging to his back. he’d maintain eye contact throughout. and then, after basking in each other’s pleasure, you’d both arrive at the same time. you can see it all in your head.

needless to say, you go to sleep that night with an unsatisfied ache between your legs.

the instagram live is just the beginning though. aurelien starts sending you gym videos that leave you hot and bothered pretty regularly, and now it’s pretty clear to you that he’s thirst trapping you. slow zoom-ins of his chest interspersed with some cute content of his dog fill your screen whenever you open his snaps; the man is truly a menace. the worst part is that it works: you spend an alarming amount of time thinking about him, or thinking about you and him together, doing nasty things. if his end goal is leaving you in a perpetual state of horniness, then he’s achieved it. it’s unfair really. 

are you free next week?

when you receive his text in the middle of work, you don’t hesitate for a second before replying with an enthusiastic yes. you quickly arrange to meet him at your place after his afternoon match. he even sends you tickets for you and a friend to attend the game, which you both enjoy. but as much as you try to focus on the game, your thoughts are already preoccupied. you make a joke with your friend about manifesting that he's oversized. because that’s all you can think about during those 90 minutes. you have high expectations, but you bet it’s better than in your head.

before you know it, you’re back in your apartment, waiting for him to pull up. you jump when you hear a knock, and you quickly open the door. he’s standing there looking handsome and freshly showered in his real madrid tracksuit and smiling that pretty smile at you. you lock eyes, and they say things you don’t verbalize. 

“hi” he says.

“hi” you say back, flushing.

he drops his bag to the floor, and he quickly sweeps you off the ground,  his lips crashing onto yours.

it is indeed better than in your head, you later find out. 

[auriidae]

LIFESTUCK ?!?! (pt 2 here!) (pt 3)

i was sick a couple days ago and spent like 12 hours straight doing nothing but classpecting life series characters and then was like Yeah i have to draw this now. so here's some sillies 👍 (super long classpect ramble under cut because i spent far too long on it not to share hfshjf)

quick note: i really really love @/classpect-navelgazing's theories and used them for a lot of the ideas here. go check their blog out it rules :]

ok you guys flower ranchers (scott tango jimmy) are making me so insane for this au specifically because of this idea i had about doom/life players. doom in true canon is related to inevitability, fate, and knowledge of the specific rules that keep the characters trapped within their story, right. and life is sort of related to healing, physically and mentally, within the confines of the game. so within this au, the aspect of life refers to the rules within the game that the players can see and are aware of (last life’s trading lives system + boogeyman, third life’s soulmate mechanic, secret life’s tasks, etc.). life players have some amount of dominion over these elements (depending on their class, of course). doom on the other hand refers to everything surrounding the games (stuff like admin powers, the world barrier, and whatever happens to the players after they die). 

as a mage of doom, scot (his name is so funny to me. like yeah he sure is) has a bunch of intrinsic knowledge about the way the games function on a logistical level. he’s like a guy who read the script a while ago and forgot all the characters’ names but knows the basic plot and how it’s going to end. or who knows all the ins and outs of tech crew and for whom the apparent magic of the show for the audience is lost on, since he knows how it’s being done. the thing is, scot isn't especially able to act on this knowledge during the game. what director wants someone in the audience — or one of the actors — taking all the magic out of the show, spoiling how it works and how it ends? no, it’s best if they keep that knowledge to themselves — and so scot’s narratively unable to affect the stories of those around him, even his close friends who he’d want to help. he’s aware of this, of course, which makes him more than a little depressed, as he can see the futility of it all and can’t even explain to anyone what’s going on and how the game works. (the only story he’s able to affect, of course, is his own. which. depressed doom player + mage martyr complex + guy who Really cares about his friends is not necessarily a good combination.)

the amount of stock i put in the idea of gendered classes is close to zero so tangoe gets to be a maid of life because ohh my goodness. i like the theory (thanks classpect-navelgazing) of life as “the aspect of affluence,” where life players usually enter the game with some kind of material wealth or status that helps their position in some way. i also like the idea that maid players start the game with a surplus of their aspect but often end up feeling as if they’re only seen as a provider of that specific thing as a result of this, and so end up longing for something else instead. this primarily applies to last life tango because that’s the season i’m most familiar with lol, but i thought the way he started out with so many lives there and quickly dwindled as a result of everyone taking from him and only him was Really interesting. mans has all the luck of the game he could need, but only wants friends to actually be able to live with. being a life player also ties into his little gambling games and things (again, dominion over stuff within the overarching game/story, but nothing beyond that).

then we get to jimi (again fantastic name). the basic premise of an heir is that they’re played by their aspect, right and Oh Boy is jimmy played by life in the life series. i don’t personally know much about anything he’s done other than heehoo canary guy but along with the previously stated points it’s So fun to see him as a life player because it allows for some really clearly contrast between the way he interacts with tangoe and scot based on their aspects. i really like the idea of scot being like “you’re a life player jimi. it's in your name. the game is not going to let you die” and jimi like “you really think so? aw thanks man” neither of them knowing that dying as a life player in this game is literally like in the job description. (ok. i kind of feel like i’m letting jimi down by basing his story so far around other people.. but this is just for fun and i can always change it later)

(also i could easily have put tangoe and jimi as doom players too but for the fact that i don’t think they necessarily see through the game as much as scot does (or at all). and so life it is.)

feel free to ask me questions abt them!!! i have so many thoughts about this bro 

[izunias-meme-hole]

You've been rebloging a decent amount of Soulsborne stuff, so if you have time, can you say who your favorite character's are in all these games?

Oh... well a fair amount of my thoughts CERTAINLY changed, but I'll give you a top 10.

Number 1. Messmer The Impaler (Elden Ring) - Messmer was certainly a welcome surprise. He was the firstborn son of Queen Marika, ultimately the one who personally oversaw the genocide of the hornsent in the Land of Shadow, and event so horrific and cruel that its impact could still be felt within the present day. He was afflicted with a curse at his birth, in which a dark and malevolent snake threatened to eat him from the inside, which resulted in Marika plucking out his eye and replacing it with a seal of grace. Sounds like quite the monster, right? Well here's the thing. Messmer's a surprisingly good boss, like he literally preserved his enemies culture inside a storeroom just because one of his knights requested it, and has at least some level of compassion. Sure some of his men defected after finding out about the true nature of his existence, but there were some that even stuck around because they know who he is as a person. So why did this great guy commit literal one of the most horrific events in history? Well you see, Marika basically told him to eliminate the hornsent, and it wasn't just a standard order... it was a secret banishment for him, and Marika's vengeance on the hornsent. That's right, Messmer was exiled so he could be a scapegoat for his mother in the Land of Shadow. While this doesn't absolve him of his crimes, it ultimately makes him extremely pitiable.

Number 2. Queen Marika The Eternal (Elden Ring) - A god, a vessel, a warmonger, a mother, a schemer, a monster, and a pitiful woman. These are all the things that Queen Marika The Eternal was, and by god she deserves to be remembered by all of them. Radagon is her other half. The Demigods were her children. Messmer is her son. The Lands Between were her lands. She destroyed several races. She destroyed the Elden ring. Everything in the game is connected to her in some capacity. This is some Sauron tier shit that's been done with someone who's now just a prisoner in her own fortress thanks to her fear of her reigns inevitable end. Elden Ring has a TON of antagonists, each one active in their own right across the Lands Between. Marika on the other hand is both a prisoner in her own home, and a god on her last knees who faces The Tarnished through Radagon, yet almost every last evil committed in the game is connected to her past history of cruelty and malevolence in service to her Golden Order.

Number 3. Malenia (Elden Ring) - Malenia was my fave for a good while, and is still one of my top 5 bosses in the series. Her background, how that background ties into the world, her difficulty not being too bullshit yet still giving veterans a good taste of the dirt, her simplistic yet effective character, and the concept of someone being that goddamn sickly yet still being so undeniably persistent, powerful, and near-invincible is intriguing and cool, and it's executed very well in her case. Her boss being optional is just icing on the cake. Overall she's a spectacle.

Number 4. Miquella (Elden Ring) - He's a charming lil guy. Yes he cut out everything that made himself a good person in order to become the god of a new era, and is an expert manipulator due to his powers, but he's still just a lil guy.

Number 5. Father Gascoigne (Bloodborne) - Originally, Laurence was my favorite Bloodborne character, but after some careful reconsideration... this guy is at the top. Why? I like how simplistic his lore is, but aside from that, he's basically a reflection of the Good Hunter and a really great first legit boss. He serves as a gatekeeper for new players, and his transformation from skilled hunter to a monstrous werewolf mid-fight is a perfect introduction to what fate usually awaits any hunter who inevitably gets blood drunk in Yharnam. And the cherry on top? He's just a guy. He was just a normal ass hunter with a wife and child before all of this, hell you could even use his daughter's music box to snap him out of his blood drunk state for a second. IMO Gascoigne is underrated as hell.

Number 6. Lady Maria (Bloodborne) - Between the Plain Doll being based off her, her connection to Gehrman, and being one of the hunters at the Fishing Hamlet, Maria is undeniably a great character with a vast presence.

Number 7. Ludwig (Bloodborne) - Tragic Hornse. In all seriousness though, Ludwig is a perfect summary of Bloodborne, and honestly one of the top 3 bosses in the entire series.

Number 8. Isshin Ashina (Sekiro) - Isshin's presence overshadows that of the main antagonist, Genechiro Ashina, and its entirely intentional. He basically is the symbol of his entire clan, leading a rebellion against the invading forces alongside many warriors and triumphing. Isshin was a living legend in the past, but in the present? He's old, sick, and on his last legs. He's still defending his clan, but for his strength, he's still mortal. He's still human. He's the perfect reflection of his clan. That and he’s an amazing final boss. Go Grandpa Ashina!

Number 9. Gwyn, Lord of Cinder (Dark Souls) - Horrible, HORRIBLE god. He ruined humanity, is a bad father, and is SO worthy of being hated... yet he's so pitiable and pathetic. Gwyn is responsible for almost every tragedy in the trilogy, yet even his own story is a tragedy. A paranoid god king making the literal worst decisions ever to the point where he literally destroys himself. There's a level of understandability with his character that makes him tragic, but ultimately, he's still a monster. And this isn't even bringing up the Soul of Cinder.

Number 10. Slave Knight Gael (Dark Souls) - An old slave knight from the age of fire, literal cannon fodder, not only outlives the gods, but goes on a quest to get the Dark Soul so that The Painter, his niece, would paint a new world. You get familiar with him in the Ashes of Ariandel DLC, and by the time of the Ringed City DLC you see that Gael has slipped into madness and stands atop literal desolation. At first he fights on all 3's, only using his sword as a weapon as he jumps and crawls around, but after his guts are cut open and he gets the power of the dark soul, he truly begins fighting like a man and will occasionally rely on the newfound power he has to strike the Ashen One down with magic. Still at the end of the day... this fight is just between two nobodies who outlived the gods.

[sihtricfedaraaahvicius]

A Love Match

Note: this fic is a bit of a birthday present to my dearest @neonhairspray. Thank you for helping me with further inspiration for this fic during our unhinged convos. I wrote this because of our conversations and want to dedicate it to you, so I hope you like it and you may notice I added some stuff for you in here!

extra note: again, we're talking FOOTBALL football, not American football ;) I edited this while watching a match, any mistakes left will be corrected over time.

Warnings: 18+! fluff/smut/mainly just very suggestive.

pairing: FootballPlayer!Sihtric x Maid!Reader (f)

summary: You accidentally fell in love with a famous football player. 

wordcount: 8,3k

Masterlist

You were never into football. It was a sport you just never cared for, because what was the bloody point of watching people run after a ball for an hour and half? It bored you greatly and, beside all that, you believed that football players were ridiculously overpaid for the bare minimum they did of playing a match every few weeks, and most of them were overly dramatic on the field too. You also thought that most footballers weren't that smart either, but in truth, what did you know? Not much, because you just weren't impressed with the whole football world. Therefore you also weren't phased when you got to work for Sihtric Kjartansson, a talented football player and a huge name in the business. You had vaguely heard of him before but you didn't care about his profession, you were only interested in the paycheck that came with being his maid, which was a royal one.

A quick google search would tell anyone that Sihtric had started out playing for the local Dunholm team as a young boy, but he outgrew the club quickly and eventually travelled all over the world to play football. He stuck around in Denmark for years, but he recently moved back to England after purchasing a massive mansion in the fanciest part of London, as he transferred back to England and was also selected to play for England's national team as the World Cup was approaching. He was one of the most interesting centre-forward players right now, and the insane amount of money he was paid to transfer back to England was sickening.

Despite your lack of interest in this job, you couldn't deny that the famous footballer was handsome. Incredibly handsome, actually. His long dark hair was always braided during a match, but tied into a nonchalant bun during training, and his well kept facial hair was always on point, highlighting his sharp and godly facial features. And the glimpses you had caught of his body weren't a punishment either, his football shirt hugging his biceps tightly while his football grip socks accentuated his calf muscles, and his thighs looked more than firm enough to make you feel good when grinding those alone. 

Sihtric had the looks but he clearly wasn't the brightest at times as you became aware he was often impulsive and reckless on the field, staining his kits with his own blood after he had injured himself in various ways, by colliding into others or by simply tripping over the ball in the heat of the moment, which only seemed to confirm your thoughts about football players not being very bright.

However, you weren't completely right about everything you always suspected about footballers, because you found out the first few weeks of your new job that Sihtric wasn't doing just the bare minimum. On the contrary, as he worked hard and was incredibly focused on his career, you were actually shocked by the amount of training he did. And you were also shocked by the amount of football kits you had to wash for him every week, with the smell of his football socks after every training and friendly match being almost lethal. But doing his laundry was a part of your job, just like keeping his entire house clean and getting groceries for him, to make sure his fridge was always stacked with the nutritious foods he needed to stay in the perfect shape he was in.

Because he had such a busy schedule you had only seen him a handful of times in passing, so you didn't know much about him, but he seemed kind and generous. Every now and then he'd leave a thank you note on the kitchen counter for you, a small way of showing his appreciation for all the work you did for him so he could dedicate every waking second to football. And it became evident one morning that despite the fact you were working for Sihtric for a few months already, you both weren't up to date with each other's schedule. You thought he was out training, as usual, thus you being the only person in his home, while Sihtric was apparently completely oblivious to the hours you worked, so he thought he was alone too.

And therefore Sihtric didn't think twice when he hopped out of the shower, not covering himself with anything except for his long black football socks because he hated the feeling of his bare feet touching the floor, and so he went downstairs to quench his thirst before getting fully dressed in his football kit and leave for training. You had been downstairs in the laundry room on the other side of his mansion, so you hadn't heard the water run while he took a shower and you also hadn't heard him come down the stairs as you were busy loading the laundry basket with his clean clothes for you to fold, which you always did in the kitchen you had cleaned prior to that.

And when you quietly made your way to the kitchen, laundry basket in hand, you froze upon the sudden sight of Sihtric standing in front of the refrigerator, his back turned to you as he drank some sparkling water straight out of a bottle while being completely naked, apart from a pair of socks. His long hair slicked back as it was still wet from his shower, and your jaw dropped as your eyes wandered over his muscular back, trailing over his broad shoulders and toned biceps, then down to his perfectly shaped waist. You then gaped at his muscular thighs and lowered your gaze down his long and toned legs, finding his socks highlighting the muscles they covered from view. And then your eyes went back up again, only to land on his firm and deliciously shaped buttocks, which were perfect, just like the rest of his body.

You gasped lightly and seemed to lose all control over your own muscles, dropping the laundry basket which landed with a dull thump on the tiles while you had to grab onto the cabinet right next to you as your knees weakened, all which in return startled Sihtric. He jumped in response to your sudden presence and turned around, completely exposing himself before he dropped the water bottle to cover up his goods with his tattooed hands, while the water oozed out of the bottle and soaked his socks slowly.

'Oh my god!' you yelled and averted your eyes as fast as you could, but not before you had already gotten a good look at his full frontal side, which wasn't any less impressive than his back, 'I'm so sorry!'

'No,' Sihtric said, panicked as he searched for something to cover himself with, 'I'm sorry,' his eyes darted all over the kitchen as he blushed, but that small kitchen towel he saw wouldn't even cover his thighs, and he knew it, 'I- I didn't know you were here.'

'I am always here,' you argued with flushed cheeks, still shocked as you knelt down to gather the laundry back in the basket, desperately trying to not look up again, 'I thought you weren't home!'

You realised Sihtric was still frantically looking for a way to cover himself with not just his hands, and you quickly threw him one of his clean football shorts. Sihtric hid behind the kitchen island and pulled up the shorts, while you feigned great interest in sorting out his clothes on that same kitchen island before folding them. Sihtric cleared his throat awkwardly before he cleaned up the mess he had made by dropping his drink, insisting he'd clean it up and not you, and he left the room without saying another word, leaving you to your work before he left for his.

Sihtric messed up his entire training as he was stuck in his head about the embarrassing encounter he had with you earlier that day. He missed every shot to score and, as a centre-forward, it was not making him look good. Pyrlig, his coach, had tried to snap Sihtric out of the weird state he was in several times, but to no avail. The coach hoped it was just a temporary state of nerves before the Euro Cup started, but in truth it had nothing to do with football. 

Sihtric just couldn't forget about what had happened that morning, and not just because he was ashamed he had fully exposed himself like that to you. He wasn't ashamed of his body at all, but he did not want you to feel awkward around him because you had seen all of him without asking for it. But the main problem for Sihtric was actually the fact that this was the first time he had gotten a good look at you, as you had only met in quick passing before while he was always in a rush, and the reason why he had been so desperate to cover himself up was because he felt a certain… excitement. And he found himself thinking of you for the rest of the day while he had to awkwardly readjust his shorts a few times.

When he came home late in the afternoon after his training, he was surprised to see you were still around. He considered avoiding you but then took a deep breath and greeted you as you locked eyes in the living room in passing, after you had just vacuumed the place. Your shift was basically over and so you tidied up the last things before going home, but Sihtric came up to you before you could grab your coat.

'Hey, so,' he said as he looked away from you, looking everywhere but into your eyes, 'I'm really sorry about what happened this morning. I never wanted to, you know, just expose myself to you like that. I would have never walked around naked if I knew you were here. I'm sorry-' he rambled on and became inaudible while he nervously raked his hands through his loose hair.

'Sihtric,' you said with a shy chuckle, 'it's okay. I know it was an accident, don't worry about it.'

'Yeah, well,' he mumbled and shrugged, 'but, eh, I was wondering if maybe, you know, we could… we could maybe go for dinner or something. I have the evening off, so, I don't know,' he began to mumble too quietly again for you to understand him.

'Dinner?' you frowned, 'tonight?'

'Yeah?'

'What, like a… uh, a date or something?' you asked carefully.

'I guess you could call it that,' Sihtric said with a shy and cautious smile, 'I mean, we barely know each other while you're in my house every day and- oh, fuck,' he suddenly groaned and buried his face in his hands, 'fuck, I'm sorry. You're probably married or something-'

'No,' you interrupted, a little quicker than anticipated and you tried to keep your cool, 'I mean, no, I am single. I just, eh, I'm just surprised is all. But, yeah, sure,' you smiled, 'but I really want to go home and change my clothes.'

'Sure, no problem,' the footballer said while he fought a huge smile, 'just give me your address and I can pick you up later.'

You slightly panicked a few hours later when you had decided to take a look at Sihtric's social media. He had millions of followers on every platform he had, and you suddenly felt ridiculous for accepting to go out with him. You weren't looking for a fancy life, you liked the humble and good life which you had created for yourself and you had no interest in changing that or somehow becoming the centre of attention when you were seen with a famous football player by your side.

You sighed and checked yourself out in the mirror a few more times. You were dressed in a figure hugging dress and some comfortable but classy shoes underneath, with a matching purse in hand. You felt silly for being nervous. You didn't care about Sihtric's fame and money, but you lied when you tried to convince yourself that you also didn't care about his looks. Because you did. You were attracted to him and you hated yourself for it, because falling for a footballer when you don't care about the sport is such a cliché. And you hated yourself even more when your doorbell rang and your heart skipped a beat before you jumped up, because you knew it was Sihtric.

Your breath hitched in your throat when you opened the door. Sihtric was dressed in black jeans with matching Oxford shoes and black socks. He wore a tight fitting black long sleeve with a turtleneck, and on top a grey blazer that was tailored to him. The tattoo on the side of his head visible as his hair was tied back into a messy but sexy bun, and around his neck hung a bronze Mjölnir pendant, which matched with the several bronze rings around his tattooed fingers. He looked simply dashing.

And Sihtric was in his turn speechless as well, seeing you all dressed up but not overdoing it. Your natural beauty made his heart skip a few beats while his mismatched eyes darted all over your figure, and he checked out your bare legs a little longer than he should have, already imagining what it would be like to kiss those up while he had you at his mercy.

After you both managed to compose yourself and indulged in some small talk, he walked you to his fancy car; a ridiculously expensive black lamborghini. You were almost terrified to move as you sat in the vehicle, afraid you'd somehow damage the pristine condition of its dark interior. And as if Sihtric didn't quite daze you enough yet, his warm amber-like scent gave you a rush of butterflies and you couldn't stop staring at his hands as he drove the fast car so smoothly and with care, never being reckless or showing off the speed it could get to. 

But despite his calm nature, you felt like you could only breathe again once Sihtric opened the car door for you and helped you out, his warm hand holding yours as he closed the door behind you and walked you to the restaurant he had picked. The place was fancy and expensive, but luckily not over the top or making you feel underdressed, and when you sat down at the table and Sihtric finally found the courage to compliment your outfit, your nerves slowly began to disappear.

That night you learned that Sihtric was kind and funny, and he was not quite as dumb as you thought he was. He was actually very smart, his problem was just that he was impulsive on the football field which often made headlines and portrayed him as a good player but also as a hotheaded player, which was the ultimate combination to be a fan favourite. But you were glad to see nothing of that hotheadedness during your pleasant dinner, as he was nothing but sweet and gentle. 

You also felt Sihtric was flirting with you every now and then, for there was a mischievous spark in his piercing eyes when he gazed at you with his half smile as you spoke. You were enamoured by him, and you had no idea he was just as smitten with you. But then he had no idea about your interest in him either, as you both downplayed your emotions throughout the evening. And when Sihtric brought you home afterwards, he walked you to your door and departed with a firm hug and another apology for earlier that day. And you hated how you found yourself in bed later that night, scrolling through his tag on instagram to look at photos and videos of him until you dozed off.

The following weeks after your sudden dinner date were surprisingly normal. Sihtric trained daily while you did your own job, and you smiled every time you arrived at his place and found he had written you an appreciative note for you before leaving the house. You rarely saw each other, which wasn't uncommon but you now thought was unfortunate because you wouldn't mind seeing him some more. And because you barely saw him, your next conversation with him a few weeks later came as a total surprise when you helped him pack his bags one evening, a few days before he was to travel to Germany for the World Cup. Sihtric looked stressed, and you asked him if he was okay, to which he nodded and then out of nowhere blurted out the question if you wanted to accompany him to Berlin.

'What?' you asked for a fifth time.

'There won't be much work to do here as I won't be home for weeks,' Sihtric shrugged while he leaned back against his ensuite bathroom door, completely dressed this time after a shower, 'and I also thought it's a way for me to thank you for taking care of my house and also for taking care of me in a way, I suppose.'

'Taking care of your place is my job, Sihtric,' you chuckled, still not sure of how to respond to his invitation.

'I know,' he shrugged, 'but still, you know? I'd like it if you would accompany me, but it's okay if you don't want to.'

'I'm just not sure of what I'm supposed to do there, I'm really not into football, I hate it,' you confessed, revealing your zero interest in his line of work.

'Oh,' Sihtric said with a grimace, slightly offended, 'I… I didn't know that.'

'No offence to you,' you blushed, feeling stupid for being so blunt.

'It's okay,' he smiled and brushed his hand through his loose hair while he looked at you, 'but, yeah, if you'd join me you would be able to see all the games, if you'd want to, and also do some sightseeing in the city.'

'Alone?'

'Well, I have some days off too.'

'But not many.'

Sihtric had no response to that as he knew you were right. You had already figured out how busy his regular training schedule was, and you couldn't even imagine his schedule during the World Cup. You noticed Sihtric's hopeful look after inviting you slowly began to turn into a saddened one, and it broke your heart. You had no idea that he invited you because he just couldn't stop thinking about you after that dinner, but also because he had felt at ease with you that evening, and that was a feeling he hadn't felt in forever. 

His team mates would all bring their partner on this trip, if they had one, and Sihtric knew how lonely it could be at night and during his days off, as his friends all went to spend time with their loved ones while he had no one to keep his mind from spiralling. He knew that the quiet evenings after a match always became deafening to him, as he'd keep replaying every mistake he made in his head. It made him a wreck, and he thought that maybe you would be able to keep him from feeling low.

'I mean… I'm not saying no,' you said as you looked at him, 'but I also don't want to be stuck in a boring hotel room on my own all the time.'

'But I'll be with you every night and every morning,' Sihtric said, and then made a disapproving face at his own words, 'that sounded weird. But you know what I mean, right?'

'I do,' you sighed softly, 'I think I'm just afraid I'll feel out of place. I'm just your maid and not even into football.'

'I know. But just think about it,' Sihtric said with a sweet smile, trying to keep his hope alive.

You smiled and rolled your eyes, because he clearly knew the effect his smile had on anyone, and he then winked before taking off his shirt as he planned on going to bed. And you couldn't help but take another look at his perfectly polished torso again before you left his room and went home.

You pondered about his offer and, after your friends had encouraged you to take this chance and see something of the world too, you decided to accept the once in a lifetime opportunity. Sihtric was ecstatic but played it cool on the outside, and he immediately made all the arrangements for you to be his companion during the most important trip of his life. You packed your bags with disbelief one day before the trip, and it only hit you once you sat in the plane with Sihtric's team and their partners that you realised what life you had just stepped into.

You felt out of place, as expected, as you weren't dating Sihtric or even really considered yourself friends with him, he was your boss in a way and you knew that everyone present knew that too. It made you a little embarrassed, but regardless of everyone being aware of who you were, you felt moved by how welcoming his friends were and no one ever asked any questions about your relationship with Sihtric. He had invited you because he wanted to have you around, and that was the only thing that mattered. You grew fond of Osferth, the goalkeeper, who was surprisingly still single and rather shy, and you also got along with Finan and Uhtred, who were both centre-midfield players, and their wives were a joy to chat to during the flight from London to Berlin. Sihtric's teammates and friends gave you some more insight about him, from stories that praised him to his most embarrassing moments, and you loved to hear every word while Sihtric occasionally glanced at you with a light blush on his cheeks as he had to endure the stories about his life.

You always smiled at him in return, and you thought about how good he looked again as he sat across from you in the private plane, dressed in black sweatpants with England's national team logo on it, combined with a matching hoodie. His hair was tied back again, but you knew his locks would be braided before his first match only a few days later. 

Once you landed in Berlin you automatically stayed close by Sihtric's side, as you were overwhelmed with all the new impressions of being in a different country you had never been to before, and by the fancy lifestyle that came with travelling with a team. It seemed that Sihtric sensed your anxiety at the airport and he instinctively took your hand, reassuring you that he wasn't just going to wander off and leave you on your own. 

You were brought to the hotel and you couldn't believe your eyes when you arrived at the place, it was so fancy and so expensive, everything felt surreal and you had to remind yourself to enjoy it. The hotel room you were staying at with Sihtric was huge and incredibly tidy. There was a huge bed in front of the enormous window, which overlooked the entire capital city, and in the middle of the suite was a jacuzzi. There was also a huge tv, a fancy sofa, a dining area and a luxurious bathroom. The place was unlike anything you had ever seen before, and you were simply speechless.

You took it easy during the first day while Sihtric had some interviews scheduled, and you'd meet up later to have dinner and spend the rest of the evening together, as he had promised. Sihtric was sweet to check in with you whenever he had a moment, texting you if you needed anything and if you were okay. The entire day was quite overwhelming and you decided to go to bed rather early after dinner, and Sihtric said he would join you as he had another busy day tomorrow. And it was then that he realised there was only one bed. He didn't want to overstep any boundaries, so he insisted on sleeping on the sofa while you took the huge bed, which you did without arguing, even though you had no problem with sharing a bed if he had asked.

The following days were more or less the same. Sihtric was busy during the day so you just relaxed in the hotel while he often checked up on you, and in the evening you dined together and talked about your day. Sihtric really did his best to make your stay comfortable, and he truly spoiled you whenever he could by bringing you delicious local snacks and little presents such as flowers and an occasional small stuffed animal. You weren't sure what you were to him, but you couldn't deny that you loved how important and cared for Sihtric made you feel, despite being one of the busiest men on the planet right now. And you never got the feeling that you had to give him anything in return, as there was still a comfortable distance between you two that Sihtric also allowed to be there, by continuing to sleep on the couch and not making any advances, even if he was longing for you.

But that comfortable distance changed suddenly after you both decided to get into the jacuzzi after dinner one evening. And despite the fact you were both in swimwear, there was a clear shift in energy that night. It was the night before England's first match, and you noticed that Sihtric wasn't as lively as usual and he seemed to be brooding.

'Are you okay?' you asked after a long silence while Sihtric stared out of the window, sitting back in the warm water across from you.

'Hm?' he seemed to snap out of his distant gaze and looked at you, 'yeah, I'm fine,' he said with a forced smile.

'Are you sure?'

You couldn't help but admire his beauty as he looked out the window again. The jacuzzi was lit up with a pleasant purple colour as the water bubbled gently, while the rest of the room was dimly lit, the lights highlighting Sihtric's sharp features and his impressive body. His hair had been braided earlier that day, and it was a look that had taken your breath away instantly. You stared at Sihtric, waiting for another response from him, but it seemed he hadn't heard you.

'Sihtric?' you carefully asked for his attention again, 'are you sure you're okay? You're so… quiet.'

'Just nervous,' he eventually murmured and looked at you, 'I guess I'm just nervous.'

'Well, that's understandable.'

'No,' Sihtric shook his head, 'I'm never nervous before a match. I don't understand it.'

'But it's an important moment in your career,' you reminded him as you mindlessly moved closer, 'I think it would be strange if you weren't nervous.'

'Maybe,' he said, almost sadly, and he looked down into the water, his shoulder faintly touching yours, 'I guess I'm just afraid I'm going to fuck it up.'

'You won't,' you said and took his hand underwater, 'you shouldn't think like that.'

Sihtric hummed softly and shrugged, then sighed and allowed his head to fall back, clearly stressed while his eyes were shut and his neck tattoo completely exposed to you.

'Hey,' you whispered and took his face, 'you'll be great, Sihtric,' you smiled as he looked at you again, 'I know you'll give it your all. Everyone knows you will give it your all. Don't doubt yourself. You were selected for a reason.'

'I guess,' he mumbled and lightly trailed his fingers over your arms.

And then without thinking you wrapped your arms around him and he immediately did the same, locking into a sudden and tight embrace while being completely silent, the only sound heard being the comforting buzzing of the jacuzzi. You held each other for minutes, your face buried in his neck while he rested his chin upon your shoulder.

'Thank you,' he whispered after a while as he still held you.

'For what?' you chuckled and pulled away to look at him.

'Consoling me,' Sihtric smiled faintly and looked away again, 'I never had anyone around who did that before other important matches.'

'Well,' you smiled and took his face again, 'I'm here now.'

Sihtric chuckled and couldn't help but gaze at you, now that you were so close to him in such an intimate setting, and he then suddenly leaned in to kiss your lips. You froze for a moment before he broke the kiss abruptly, and you stared at each other with big eyes while both being breathless.

You then pulled him closer and kissed him in return, to which he wrapped his strong arms around you again and kissed you back eagerly. Gently at first, but the kiss deepened quickly and before you knew it you straddled his lap while his tongue was in your mouth and his hands grabbed you wherever he could. You moaned against his lips while his ragged breaths filled your lungs, and he hooked his arms under your knees to pick you up effortlessly and carry you out of the warm water, towards the sofa.

'No,' you giggled as Sihtric sat down with you in his lap, both soaking the entire sofa with your wet clothing, 'we'll ruin the sofa like this.'

'I don't care,' Sihtric hummed and kissed you again, 'I'll pay for it,' he murmured and then softly bit your lower lip before kissing you deeply again, his hands in your hair while you felt his arousal press up against your clothed folds.

He grabbed your hips, guiding you to grind down on him while you made out passionately, and it didn't take long before you both became a desperately moaning mess for each other, wanting more.

'No,' Sihtric suddenly breathed against your lips before he kissed you again and again, 'no, no,' he murmured, which confused you.

'What?' you pulled away, thinking you were doing something he did not want, but Sihtric was quick to pull your lips back onto his again.

'I can't be doing this,' he whispered out of breath in between kisses, 'I can't,' he moaned heavily when he pushed you to grind down on him once again, torturing himself as he wanted you so desperately but couldn't allow himself to have you just yet. 'I can't have sex before a game day,' he sighed and dropped his head, leaning his forehead onto your shoulder, 'I'm sorry.'

'Oh,' you gasped softly, 'I… it's okay. I didn't know that, I'm sorry too.'

'Don't be,' Sihtric whispered, 'it's my fault. I shouldn't have allowed myself to kiss you like that.'

He shook his head, saddened, and you moved to sit next to him. You both stared out of the massive window, overlooking Berlin at night time while you tried to get a grip on yourself again. A few minutes later you excused yourself to the bathroom, getting out of your swimwear and slipping into some comfy sleeping clothes before you snuck into the large bed. Sihtric changed his clothes not much later and you enjoyed the sight of him walking out of the bathroom in just his tight fitting boxers, the thin fabric hugging his perfectly shaped booty of which you couldn't keep your eyes off, and they only got pulled away from his backside when you realised he was putting towels on the sofa so he could sleep on it.

'What are you doing?' you asked as you sat up in bed.

'I have to go to sleep,' Sihtric chuckled a little confused, 'it'll be a long day tomorrow-'

'I know,' you interrupted, 'that's why I don't want you to sleep on the sofa. Take the bed,' you said as you attempted to move out, 'I'll take the-'

'No,' Sihtric said sternly, 'I won't let you sleep on the sofa.'

'And I won't let you sleep on the sofa either,' you said with your hands on your hips, showing him you were serious too, 'you need a good rest before tomorrow. I insist you are taking the bed.'

'And I insist you are not taking the sofa.'

'I don't mind sharing the bed, Sihtric,' you rolled your eyes, 'I never had a problem with that, you just went for the sofa so I figured it was a gentleman's gesture. But if you wanted to sleep in the bed too, I wouldn't have refused. We're both adults,' you scoffed and got back under the sheets again, 'so get that nice ass of yours in bed.'

'Nice ass?' Sihtric mumbled as he grabbed his pillows and joined you in bed, 'you think I have a nice ass?' he asked after a while as you laid in the dark.

'Sihtric,' you sighed, 'the entire world thinks you have a nice ass.'

Sihtric laughed softly at that and moved to lay on his side, facing you as the moon faintly illuminated your face, and he gently cupped your cheek in the darkened room.

'I'm sorry that I kissed you,' he whispered, 'I should've known better, but I couldn't help myself. I just can't be intimate before a match, even if I wanted to. I'm sorry I didn't tell you.'

'It's okay. I feel bad too… I guess it was just a mistake.'

'No,' Sihtric said softly, 'it was not a mistake. The timing is just not right, but it was no mistake on my end.'

'Oh,' you breathed as you mindlessly moved your hand up the side of his body and to his neck.

'Maybe,' Sihtric began, 'we could, you know… just kiss a little?'

'Just a little,' you chuckled shyly.

'Only a little,' he whispered, and you heard the smile in his soft voice before he planted his lips onto yours again. 

You kissed with a little more self control this time, until you felt his hand move down to your thigh, and he suddenly trailed his fingers across your panties, to which you broke the kiss.

'What are you doing?'

'You… you don't want me to?' he whispered.

'No, I mean, I do, but… I don't understand,' you said with a soft chuckle.

'Just because I can't have pleasure doesn't mean I can't give you any.'

You smiled and kissed him again, you weren't saying no to that and you allowed his hand to explore your skin further and let him pull down your underwear. You felt his warm fingertips slide teasingly over your wet folds, and you gasped mid-kiss when he slid two digits inside you with ease. He kissed you again, loving the way you moaned against his lips while he pleased you with his hands and felt your walls clench around his fingers.

'Making such pretty sounds for me,' he hummed softly, 'but I'm sure you can sound even prettier for me,' he whispered and pulled away from you, only to disappear under the warm sheets.

You felt his hands grab your ankles, and then your legs were suddenly resting upon his back while you felt his mouth leaving wet kisses on your thighs before you felt his hot breath against your sweet spot. You gasped loudly when he gently kissed your pussy, before he delved his tongue between your folds while he held your hips tightly, and you accidentally scratched up his back and neck in pleasure as you couldn't grab onto his hair, because you could not ruin the footballer's braids the night before an important match.

The next morning you woke up with Sihtric's arms around you, moments before his alarm blared as it was time for him to wake up. It was way too early for you to get up yet, so you turned around in bed a few more times while Sihtric was going for his morning jog. You met him a few hours later for breakfast and he told you what his day would look like. He also invited you to watch the game in the stadium, but you still didn't feel quite comfortable enough to go there, so you declined and said you'd watch it in your room, which he completely understood. You were both a little unsure where you and him stood now after last night's adventure, and neither of you dared to kiss each other again, so you just gave him a few encouraging words instead and a firm hug before he left.

You hated how nervous you were for him. And you hated football, so how could you possibly care about it now? But you cared about Sihtric though, and you wanted him to win. So with a nauseating feeling you paced around the room until the match started early in the evening. You bit your nails off while watching, and you actually stopped breathing for a second when there was a close up of Sihtric on your tv screen where you noticed a red mark in his neck; a scratch which you had left on him the night before as he had gone down on you until you had moaned his name over and over again.

You blushed at the memory and couldn't help but smile every time you saw Sihtric on screen, looking so good with his braided hair and that black and white football kit on. You cheered embarrassingly loudly when Sihtric scored the first goal of the evening, just before the second half, and you held your breath when he was suddenly down on the field after he had taken a tumble. A player from the opposite team had deliberately pushed him over while trying to take the ball, and you watched the guy receive a yellow card for his vile actions. You felt relieved when Sihtric got up again and was able to continue the game, but it was nerve wracking regardless. Sihtric eventually received a yellow card himself after he tackled someone, and if looks could kill, Sihtric would've killed that referee right on the spot. Sihtric made many more attempts to score another goal in the second half, but the opposing team was too strong to let the ball pass, yet too weak to make a goal of their own. And so the game concluded with England's first win, and you jumped up on the sofa as you cheered.

You didn't understand why you were so happy about that damn game, but when Sihtric returned to the hotel room a few hours later he was more than thrilled to have you run up to him and jump into his arms.

'Congratulations,' you smiled down at him as he held you, leaning your forehead against his, 'I told you you'd do great.'

'Thank you,' he smiled shyly while looking up at you, desperately wanting to kiss you but not being entirely sure if he should or could, so instead he just walked you over to the sofa and sat you down.

Sihtric had already showered and changed into his comfortable sweatpants and hoodie before leaving the stadium, and despite the fact he looked tired from the match, he still looked as handsome as ever and you couldn't keep your eyes off him. Luckily for you, he couldn't tear his own eyes away from you either while you discussed the game until the early hours. Again you shared the bed with him, quietly laying next to each other with the lights still on until you both couldn't contain your desire for each other anymore, and your lips crashed together into a passionate kiss, just like the night before. But this time Sihtric had no reason to hold back, no matter how tired he was, and he kissed you deeply. You felt his hands all over your body as he undressed you before he moved up from the bed and took your hands, pulling you up towards him as he stood next to the bed. He took off his sweater and took your hands again, sliding them up his perfect body so you felt every single muscle underneath your palms, almost making you forget how to breathe.

You then curled your fingers around the elastic band of his sweatpants and you slid them down, revealing his trapped arousal as it was desperate to be freed from his tight boxers, but first you cupped his big and hard cock, teasing him while you pulled him in by his necklace to kiss his lips. Sihtric took your face, his hands trembling from all of the adrenaline in his body after winning the game and having been desperate to fuck you stupid for days already. He groaned while you taunted him with your hands, and he pushed you down on the bed before taking off his underwear and sneaking under the covers with you. You made out again, and it was as desperate as it was passionate, and you dishevelled his braids with your fingers while you got lost in each other's touch before you finally experienced the bliss of feeling him deep inside you.

You made love for hours, Sihtric desperately fighting his urge to make you both finish quickly, as he wanted to savour the feeling of being inside you and being intimate with someone who genuinely cared about him. And when you both finally came, just when dawn arrived, you fell asleep in each other's arms and slept almost through the entire day.

You woke up late in the afternoon and ordered some room service, not wanting to spend your day being around other people, just each other. You made out whenever you could in your hotel room; while taking a shower together, while watching some tv and even while trying to get dressed once the sun had set so you could explore Berlin at night together, as Sihtric had another day off tomorrow. 

You explored the darkened streets hand in hand, stopping every few steps to kiss each other's lips or nuzzle each other's noses, like a teenage couple disgustingly in love, which made your sightseeing trip last ridiculously long. You kissed underneath the Brandenburger Tor and at the East Side Gallery, as well as in front of the Berlin cathedral and at the museum island, where you even snapped a few cute selfies together for private use only.

'I think I'm falling for you,' you smiled against his lips, while being surrounded by the impressive museum buildings at night.

'I already fell for you,' Sihtric smiled and kissed you softly, 'and I've been down here for a while already, waiting for you. And I'll catch you, don't worry,' he whispered, his lips brushing faintly against yours.

His words reassured you, no matter how crazy this entire trip had been so far. And once back in the hotel again, long after midnight, you once again had passionate sex for a good hour, and you fell asleep all cuddled up.

The next day it seemed that life started to go back to normal again, whatever normal was at that point. Sihtric had training to attend to and a bunch of press to do with his team, while you allowed yourself to be lazy in the jacuzzi until it was time to grab dinner with the handsome footballer in the evening. Everything seemed perfect, and Sihtric gradually became affectionate in public with you, which you enjoyed more than you thought. But his mood changed again upon entering the hotel room after dinner, as he had another match again tomorrow.

Sihtric seemed to shut down again while you laid in bed, and you took him in your arms without saying a single word because you already knew he felt stressed, as all eyes would be on him again tomorrow. It was only when you saw the tears in his eyes that you became worried, but Sihtric said he was fine and that those tears weren't tears of sadness. He reassured you he was okay, and he kissed you lovingly before saying good night and switching off the lights.

Sihtric held you tightly in the dark as he wanted to tell you how he felt, but he couldn't find the right words. All he knew was that he felt complete, for once in his life, because he was now experiencing something he never had before yet always longed for; someone waiting for him to celebrate a win with, someone to console him after a loss, and someone to encourage him when he felt uncertain about himself. He finally had someone to come back to and feel safe and loved with after the whirlwind of a match day, someone who made him forget about his worries and allowed him to relax again. But most importantly, he finally had someone who made him happy, and it was overwhelming to him.

The second match was just as stressful as the first one had been for you, but you watched it regardless in your hotel room and were screaming your lungs out when England won the game again. The following weeks continued to go as the previous one. You and Sihtric grew closer together while keeping your relationship private as much as possible, and you encouraged him before every match day. England continued to be undefeated and eventually found their place at the World Cup final. Sihtric was more stressed than ever but having you by his side soothed him, and he kept saying you were his lucky charm.

You decided to watch the final match in the stadium, with the other wives and girlfriends, and Sihtric was over the moon when he walked out on the field and saw you there, wearing one of his own football shirts with his name and number on it. He blew you a kiss before the game started, and you almost scared yourself with how passionate you had gotten about the sport. You loved the feeling you got when Sihtric scored a goal, causing the entire crowd of England supporters to go mental. Your seat vibrated each time the crowd celebrated, as thousands of fans jumped up and down while cheering on the man you had fallen in love with, and you also became more vocal during the match too, shouting and cheering along with everyone else. And when the whistle sounded after ninety minutes, signalling that the match was over and England had won with an amazing 4 - 0, you screamed just as loud as every other England supporter in the stadium while you watched Sihtric run around the field with his hands up, celebrating their victory with his team and their coach.

Uhtred and Finan were fast to depart their team and ran to the side of the field where you were at, as their partners were seated next to you, and the girls jumped down to celebrate with their man while a low fence separated them. You smiled as you watched them and then you suddenly saw Sihtric run over to your side too. His eyes were locked with yours while he closed in on the fence, and he gestured you to come down too, which you did. You shyly approached him, but he made you forget about everyone around you when he pulled you in his arms, as far as the fence would allow it, and then placed his hand on the back of your neck to pull you in for a steamy kiss. You were too shocked to pull away, but at this point you could also care less about who saw it, because you were in love with him and you didn't want to hide it anymore. And clearly, neither did Sihtric.

You left the stadium before the team did, and Sihtric rushed back to the hotel as fast as he could, after having showered and changed outfits at the stadium and giving some interviews. Sihtric jogged up to the elevator and impatiently pressed for the doors to close and take him up to the right floor. His shoulders collided with the elevator doors as they opened and he made haste to get out, and he chuckled to himself while he grabbed the key out of his pocket, wasting no time to enter the room he knew you were in. And he was pleasantly surprised to find you waiting for him, sitting on the bed while wearing nothing but his football shirt. He gave you a sly smile and kicked the door shut behind him, then stalked over to you while taking off his shirt and pulling out his hair tie, letting his long, wavy and damp hair fall down before he climbed in bed and pinned you down.

'Congratulations,' you whispered as you looked up at him, your hands trailing over his chest, 'I'm proud of you, baby.'

'I couldn't have done it without you, darling,' Sihtric whispered and smiled.

And he then kissed you with that same passion as he had done every other night, and he fucked you three more times before you had to take the flight back home to London the next day. He took you everywhere he could; on the sofa, on the bed, on the table, in the jacuzzi, on the floor and even on the balcony.

And on your plane trip back home, you sat cuddled up against him instead of across from him, as you had done the first day of your trip, and you couldn't imagine being without him anymore.

'Are you my girl now?' Sihtric asked, shortly before the plane landed.

'Do you want me to be?' you asked with a cheeky smile.

'Hm,' he hummed, 'no… I want you to be my wife, actually.'

'Okay,' you chuckled, 'but I'm also still your maid, right?'

'No, darling,' Sihtric smiled and took your face, 'if you're mine, I promise that you'll never have to work another day in your life again. I got you,' he whispered and kissed your lips, 'just like you had my back these past weeks.'

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[emblazons]

so I swore I was not going to start speculating off of set images, but given the one's we've gotten of Dustin so far, I cannot help myself (plus it's fun). Still: none of the theories I've seen so far make as much sense to me as this being tied to Dustin's trauma and him having a Vecna Vision/Flashback, which becomes clearer the more you put the details revealed in the images into the context we've been given by S4 + The Duffers.

First, the images I'm referencing (TW: IMAGE SPOILERS):

Separately, these things (the basketball players, Dustin's hellfire fit being the same at both the grave and school + him wearing Eddie's rings + Mike's hair & attire) all feel a bit disparate...until you remember the things both Dustin is trying to cope with (Eddie's death + feeling like an outsider) and the Duffers have said re: Eddie and his effect on the characters (listen if you can, its only 3 min). Why?

Well, because we know for a fact that 1) Dustin and Mike were the ones who felt most aligned with Eddie given their being bullied—

—even though we spent all of S4 building the bond between Dustin and Eddie in particular, because Mike was in California with Will.

Similarly (and while I know it's not primary canon), we get this context from Lucas in Lucas on the Line, which corroborates Dustin's comment about Lucas "making all his sports friends" and feeling deeply betrayed by that fact—

—and even stuff about Mike's appearance "not changing" (pre-hellfire, in the moments he's still in S3/regressive conformist territory +not embracing himself)....something that Eddie talks about in S4 when he comments on the look Mike had when he met him.

(I've also already commented on that Mike's shirt looks a lot like the one El wears post Rink-O-Mania in S4—which plays a lot into the idea of Mike giving El a shirt that represents conformity to him (just like her being his girlfriend does, given he cannot be himself in front of her at all in S4).

Combining all of these things though—Dustin being the only one who is in the Hellfire shirt (while all the other extras look a very "S1 good suburban kid" I/ first day of school), Mike showing up (also looking like his 'conformist' self in contrast), Basketball players being on the scene (the people Dustin felt stole Lucas from him)...combined with him in the same outfit at the grave of the person he felt defended him from those losses and challenges in high school?

It's giving Dustin's grief / worst thoughts thrown back at him 100%.

Given that Eddie, who he lost in an extremely traumatic fashion is the one who said forced conformity (which Mike is showing up dressed as alongside Lucas's basketball friends) killed the kids—

—and now they are facing off with Vecna (and Henry by extension, whose says shit like THIS) on top of asking people to "join him" in his displeasure with the world when he 'takes their souls?'

On top of the fact that we KNOW for a fact there is time fuckery coming for us...and it's likely enough that it's 'now 'canonically 1986 (or near it), which is reminiscent of this moment (likely remembered and traumatizing for Dustin specifically)?

Yeah. Flashback / lead up into Vecna torture is exactly what it gives to me—the things causing the event / the moments that lead into the torture. Especially knowing the scenes shot first (aka now) are generally more SFX complex because they take the most time.

bonus: @magentamee also brought up some great points on this theory here!

bonus bonus: I wrote something on Dustin and standing apart from relationship conformity as early as S3 here and wrote up the relationship he has with nonconformity today, which I think plays into his feelings of alienation / what Vecna might pull him apart from his friends by showing him.

[marv3l-drag0ns]

Making my own idea of what the minecraft movie could have been.

Steve wakes up alone, in the wilderness. He's got no idea whats going on, but its slightly implied that theres something off to him about where he is. He starts walking and messing around with stuff, maybe making some tools or a crafting bench. Then he finds a village, and is so happy to be around other people, but hes gotten there right at sunset, so all the villagers are locking up shop and hunkering in their homes. He's confused until he hears the zombies groans, and then is terrified and begs to hide in someones house. A nice family takes him in, and he falls asleep scared.

In the morning, he wakes up to see deep gouges and arrows stuck in the walls of many homes. He keeps looking, and starts to see creeper holes, and splatters of gore where a severly broken down iron golem defeated a few monsters. Days pass as he slowly gets accustomed to village life.

One day, he hears the bell being frantically rung and everyone going back to hide in their homes. The iron golem, which is barely working now, staggers to its feet to defend its home and people. Pillagers rush into the village, vindicators start cutting down doors, and a ravager smashes into the iron golem, finally breaking it. Steve's freaking out with the rest of the villagers, and those who arent killed are tied up to be brought back with the pillagers. Steve is one of those.

The pillagers go back to the mansion, where the Summoner tells steve that the pillagers are looking to bring a world destroying entity to the overworld. The summoner speaks reverently of it and the eternal darkness it will bring with it. Steve is terrified, but stands up to the summoner only to get cut by vexes.

Steve is later brought to the nether to be used as a distraction as the pillagers delve into the nether fortress. As they go through the nether, he sees the immense damage the pillagers have wrought upon the Piglins and their bastions, and feels really sad when he sees a baby pokin their head through a broken wall only to be pulled back by a parent. They reach the fortress, and steve is badly burnt by a blaze, but manages to get a few rods. He also manages to fight a wither, barely escaping, in order to remind the viewers that it ccould be the wither the pillagers are tring to summon.

On the way back, the pillagers spot an enderman and shoot at it, only to curse when the enderman grows enraged and kills one of the pillagers. A vindicator cuts it down, but doesnt take the pearl, which steve notices and does take.

Steve manages to escape the mansion, running off with an iron axe, some gold boots, the blaze rods, and the enderpearl. he also rescues another player prisoner, Alex. They escape, and alex helps Steve make the eye of ender, saying that the Pillagers want to tame the dragon that lives in the void and use it to shape the overworld into the wastes that is the End.

Steve and alex must then race to find the stronghold and get good enough gear to slay the dragon, while still dodging pillagers. Herobrine is teased as the first player who tried to kill the dragon, but no one knows what happened to him. Theres a funny scene where steve is super afraid of a silverfish but alex kills it easily. Theres a heartbreaking scene where they go back to the nether only to realize they dont want to kill the endermen either, but a piglin mother sees this and trades them a few enderpearls for steves boots.

They make it, they kill the dragon and alex takes the egg, the end fleets are teased if they want to make a second movie. Steve is sad about the loss of the village and about the devastation the piglins faced, but is happy to have made new friends. The end poem is read and steve cries about it, mourning a past he may never remember. the universe gives him a hug. THE END.

[attonposting]

Okay, so Carth keeps coming up lately, both by people who love him and people who don't, and I thought I'd throw my two cents into the ring.

People complain that Carth is sexist, a lot. And I get where that's coming from, I've got the same issues with his romance as anyone else. I love the bones of Carth's character and remember him very fondly – he's tied for my favorite character from KotOR I, even! But the writing is... flawed, to say the least, and in a way that goes past just 'poorly aged.' I don't think his lines themselves ever go worse than awkward, but there's some more fundamentally unhealthy stuff written into his relationship that I suspect wasn't intentional.

What I find interesting, and what a meme just very succinctly pointed out, is that many of the same people who have beef with Carth are cool with Atton. Who is definitely the more sexist of the two, both incidentally and deliberately. And it's a really interesting differentiation between the two pilots/f!PC love interests/earlygame buddies, because I think their palatability comes entirely down to how the games portray that sexism. So this is my attempt to figure out why one thing works and the other kinda doesn't.

Carth Onasi is introduced as a stand-up guy. He stays behind as long as he possibly can to save other survivors on the Endar Spire; he believes in the Republic wholeheartedly, he serves to protect and approves when you do the same, and other characters sing his accolades. He's supposed to be wholesome, but with PTSD-related trust issues that cause friction between him and you.

Atton Rand is the opposite of that. You find him in a jail cell, he's untrustworthy and a cad, at any given moment he's either abrasive or lying through his teeth, he complains when you help people, and when you get to the bottom of his trust issues, you find out he's a worse guy than you ever could have imagined.

It's much too oversimplified to say that Carth is supposed to be a good person and Atton is not, that's not where the problem comes from, but it will become relevant later.

When Carth starts flirting with you... okay. The biggest, most obvious problem is that the game wants you to be into it. Carth flirts and continues to flirt after you can tell him to stop. Sure, whatever; that's not egregious. You can respond to Carth's flirting positively or negatively, and that's great... but when you do respond negatively, the game loves to pull you into these playful insult exchanges where your PC shouts and pouts while Carth taunts you. There's where the issues start. Even when the player is trying to shut him down, they get dragged along for the ride anyway, and the narrative decides that this is also romantic. Thus KotOR I only has a shallow understanding that it's presenting a situation a woman may want nothing to do with. It's kind of impressive that you can actually call Carth sexist in-game, and yet it doesn't feel like the game actually understands that he is in fact being sexist.

Actually, no. Maybe I'm reading too deep into this, maybe this is why I'm so forgiving to Carth as a character, but I don't think the problem is Carth, I think the problem is that the game is being sexist in this particular spot. I was more annoyed by my own return dialogue options than anything Carth said to me - especially the ones where I was being mean. It felt like f!Revan was being pigeonholed hard into the writer's idea of 'women', that it was not an especially flattering or nuanced view, and there wasn't anything that I actually wanted to say. Definitely the writer did not understand my perspective as a player – but that's not a problem unique to K1 and it's one even the sequel is super guilty of at times, so I'll move on for now.

When Atton makes skeevy remarks, you always have at least one dialogue option to call him out for it, and you cannot ever react positively to what he says. Either you smack him down or you ignore him. This is extremely important. Yes, you could argue that it's not as accommodating to how different players might react... but what this establishes is that the game is self-aware. It does not think what Atton is doing is in any way attractive, or that it should be interpreted positively. Instead it acknowledges what a lady's probable reaction to his unwanted advances would be and encourages the player to express it, and the way that's written isn't a playful back-and-forth, it's the Exile snapping at him and Atton backtracking. Atton's being a piece of shit, but instead of stirring up chemistry, the narrative goes out of its way to mete out karma – hence everyone else on the ship mocking him, or the comically topical details like him being an unwashed loser who smells terrible and scratches his junk in public. Whether you like Atton or not, the game wants you to know that it thinks he sucks, and you are never left feeling like there is an unsettled score.

On the contrary, this lack of self-awareness is what makes Carth's romance in K1 hard to swallow if you didn't start out receptive to it. When you can react negatively to Carth's comments, it doesn't feel like you can do so in an intelligent way. The tone is very “Ugh, MEN, amirite” rather than “I don't like the turn this conversation has taken and would like to just be your colleague again” or just “Stop.” - which is probably what you wanted to say if you were just platonically enjoying or less-amicably bickering with your dorito-jacket companion when the gorgeouses started coming out of left field.

Worse, when you actually can shut Carth's romance down, it involves being a dick to him and stomping hard on his personal issues. Like I'd understand if a player was angry with him at this point, because again, you've been forced into a romance arc even when you were telling the game no as much as it would let you - but there's a huge difference between wanting to tell a guy to back off and wanting to shit on his dead wife or his Sith kid or his blown-up planet. I dunno, I'm not that vindictive! I think there's only a couple of options at the very end of his romance tree where you can turn him down... not even amicably, it's still rude, just without being a Grade-A asshole, and by that point, you have been through a lot of flirting you presumably didn't want to be involved with. Generally, the game won't let you break things off with him without being a dick, even if you never agreed to board that train in the first place. Now loop back to the way that K1 unfailingly portrays Carth as a great guy, whose flaws have nothing to do with his upstanding sense of morality, and there's where the dissonance comes from. Not only does the game push you into his romance after you said no, it makes you the bad guy for trying to get out of what he initiated.

But there's another issue in the timing of the Carth relationship. He starts his flirting while he's expressing intense distrust and standoffishness with your PC. With Carth's nonstop skepticism about your trustworthiness, and constantly bringing up his issues with you... at least during Taris and Dantooine, it comes off more like his attraction to you is superficial and not as a result of him growing to like you, something that's pushed by how it's always focused on shallow hooks like your appearance or your 'cute' attitude. It's very awkward. I do not think this was the writer's intent. I think Carth's supposed to be captivated by what he's seen you do, and that's just going in recursive loops in his paranoid little brain and making things harder for him. By the end of the romance, it's extremely clear that Carth's into you for you. But it's clumsily handled at the start.

Contrast this with Atton, who starts off aggressively sexist towards a female Exile, fifty times more offensive than anything Carth ever does. Literally the first line he gets is leering at the PC's forced state of undress, mocking her vulnerability, and he continues in that vein for much of Peragus. He creeps on your nudity at least four times off the top of my head, he ogles you, he complains about women, he tries to hit on you, he even contemplates the possibility of Sexy Kreia (which is a level of dickery I can scarcely comprehend.)

But that tapers off and disappears around the time he starts showing actual romantic interest in your PC, like when Kreia threatens him and it's revealed how much your opinion matters to him, or when he asks Bao-Dur for advice. And a female PC never sees it again. This creates the opposite impression – that Atton's attraction is a result of your time together. Sure, he's still a pig, but it follows that he wasn't making serious passes at you on Peragus because his behavior now that he is actually interested in you has changed. And it implies that in an actual relationship, that would not be how he'd view or treat you, which I think is crucial for how willing people are to ship Atton with their Exiles.

Now, this is all a product of how K2 did not actually answer that question and let you romance Atton, because with Carth, it's the opposite and you see exactly how he behaves once he gets into a serious relationship. It involves spanking. Things could be very different if K2 actually had fleshed out romances. It's hard to say, because both the PC and the crew were very thoughtfully written (I will take a bold step here and say that K2's characters were on the whole written much better than K1's), but on the other hand, Atton is still the worst and I'm pretty sure the game would want to remind you of that if you agreed to play tonsil hockey with him. And it may have crashed into the same pitfall that Carth's did; if the game railroaded your interactions with Atton up to some point, it'd leave a bad taste in anyone's mouth who wasn't already signed up for the ship.

With the way things are, Atton not only gets a free pass to be interpreted as generously as his fans want and easily ignored by those who weren't keen on him, he even gets an interest boost from this because people will always want what they can't have.

Anyway. With a male PC, you'll continue to see Atton make sexist remarks towards other female characters and can even have a wingman chat with him that is entirely him projecting his issues all over women. He doesn't make these comments with a female PC, suggesting that he's on his best behavior... but that he'd still totally be a leering asshole if he wasn't trying to impress you. With a male PC and Carth, his sexism is nonexistent, again probably because he was never intended to be sexist and it's a product of clumsy/oblivious writing.

There's an additional layer with Atton and the question of how much anything he does is an act, but that doesn't exonerate him from any of the crap he says. I could write a separate essay on Atton and his relationship with women, but the guy is very much a womanizer who's terrified of the idea of intimacy and has a lot of shitty opinions that stem from his defensive need to believe that nothing emotional is ever real or relevant to him. He might've been casing the Exile on Peragus, but his chauvinism is genuine.

But I digress. The tl,dr; is that Atton acts less sucky the more he crushes on you and Carth acts more. Combo that with how their respective games make Atton pay for being creepy but give the strong impression they want you to go along with Carth's nonsense, and it's a little less mystifying why Carth gets so little benefit of the doubt while the King of Trash enjoys fandom sexyman status. His romance is almost predicated on the fact that he's a scumbag, where Carth's is very confused to whether the awkward parts should exist or not.

There's a bit more that kinda hurts Carth. The flirting... well, from what I remember it just got “wow, okay then” later on, and I found it way more silly than offensive in any way, but him repeatedly bringing up how you remind him of his dead wife doesn't help the relationship much and suggests that Carth may be projecting someone else over you. I can live with that, drama's tasty and it doesn't prevent a real connection from burgeoning. You can make the exact same argument for Atton anyway, and I think his is way worse. My major issue is at the end of the game. Mr. Trust Issues does not react well to the events on the Leviathan, when it turns out he was right to have kept an eye on the PC all along. It's great payoff! And I absolutely adore his discussion after that, when he admits his struggles to reconcile you and Revan, how he tried but he can't hate you, how helping you gave him something real when revenge only left him hollow. Seriously, for all the shade it gets, there's some really great stuff in his romance too - you just have to stick it out long enough to see it. But then, on Rakata Prime, Carth seems to reconcile his crisis of faith and finally, wholeheartedly decide to love you in a way that falls flat on its face. He confirms you're a good person because you're not Revan anymore, like Revan is some purely evil part of you you've now cast off, when... that really seems more like denial than anything else, and not the foundation for anything healthy.

Seriously, I wish they'd handled that with more nuance. It would have counted for so much in my books.

All of that said. I know I just went after the man like a vending machine with a stuck bottle of chocolate milk, but I think the sexist vibes in Carth's romance are worst at the start and that he does not deserve the sheer amount of flack he gets. I've seen far worse offenders in the world of video game romances, and this might drive some controversy in and of itself, but I vastly prefer Carth x f!Revan to Bastila x m!Revan. There's a whole 'nother pile of issues in K1's other official ship (f in chat for Juhani), and I think those are much harder to deal with than the ones here. If anything frustrates me with Carth's romance, it's how unnecessary all of the bullshit is. I really want to get into it! The concept is perfectly fine! I love the character! There's good stuff in there! And when I replay KotOR, it's not that difficult to close my eyes to the bleh parts and enjoy the rest, especially once the first couple of conversations are past. Again, all Carth needed was a more conscientious writer at the wheel.

I'd be really interested in hearing other people's takes, both on how they interacted with either of those romances or where their interpretations differed from mine. I only have my own perspective and that of a few people I've talked to over the years, and I'm given to understand this is something of a fandom hot topic!

[to-my-emil]

luca's 2024 letter

so i did a whole analysis/explanation/infodump about luca's newest letter on my discord server and. figured i may as well post it here! theres a lot of fun tasty things in here and some confirmation of things that have been implied in previous letters which is fun to look at. please keep in mind i dont have the entirety of every character and manor game's lore memorized so while i did double check some things i mightve missed some stuff. anyway its all below the cut since its Long have fun :)

(also feel free to chime in with any thoughts/feelings/opinions/ideas!)

so theres three sections to this letter! im gonna go section by section, but some parts of the last section are mentioned earlier so uh. sorry if you havent read it yet (id recommend u do read it first)

so part 1 is pretty fun. luca is confirmed to have survived game 10 (which also features tracy, charles, and bonbon though we dont currently know who the fourth survivor participant is) And its implied that hes the only survivor of the game (according to the "fleeting victory" thats the assumption at least). his traits w being able to connect the ciphers is also officially tied into the lore here; there are in fact wires running underneath each arena (or at the very least whichever arena lucas game was in which we dont know yet iirc) so its canon that he can do what he does in matches and its not something that the detective incorrectly deduced lorewise (idk if any of the survivor abilities are Actually incorrect deductions/not actually things that theyre doing (like for example priestess's portals, etc that seem more far-fetched) but since we know hes done other things incorrectly (like "prisoner" and "psychologist" titles being in quotes/technically wrong) i figure he mightve gotten some of those wrong too). luca is also Super Fucked Up w an unusuable left arm (and his previous injuries which we know includes at Least severe brain trauma but likely physical trauma too considering his time in prison + the leg braces) so uhhhhhhhhhhh. my money is NOT on him for the next game.

which is the fun next thing to talk about: baron deross is making him do another game!! this confirms whats implied in emmas 2022 letter (she writes "I've won the previous round, for now" which implies a second round if not more), and probably means that helena and galatea would also go through another round even though its not confirmed yet. so far we dont have a record of what happens in any second manor game for a player who has won (as far as i remember); usually what happens is entire groups are eliminated before the game and the only survivor goes on to the next round to try again by default rather than having won the game (like murro and luchino). so far luca's second game is the only one we have ANY info about for a survivor whos won their first game; we know that alva is in it and its heavily implied ann is in it (we'll get to this later) so we'll likely find out what happens once we get either of their experiment letters. its also interesting that the baron seems to reveal more information about the experiments to luca after luca won his game, but its hard to know whether thats because luca is also a scientist or if he reveals that to everyone who wins. my guess is maybe the former bc u Know luca would have questions and theres also no mention of baron deross saying anything like that in emmas, galateas, or helenas letters.

on to section 2!!! (there was a slur against disabled people in the last line of this section so. thats whats blocked out)

OKAY SO. definitely confirmed that hes in a second manor game, its not even subtext its just right there. assuming the "mechanisms" refer to the same mechanisms that are running under the arena and connecting the cipher machines my guess is that this is what he used to shock other participants?? rather than just being to conduct electricity through himself like he does in the game?? idk thats just spaghetti at the wall its not clear here how he actually got shocked and why. it Is clear that he passed the fuck out at some point or another/his memory issues have gotten worse and the wiki points to that guy in his dream being hermann, so that's. interesting. theres an implication here that luca and hermann used to be closer, but once luca started w physics hermann went mmmm time to stop being a father. which. checks out knowing hermann. whats even more interesting is that luca calls hermanns ideas "ludicrous fantasies" that are neither idealistic nor realistic, because like luca you went and did THE EXACT SAME THING. BRO HE WORKED ON PERPETUAL MOTION. YOURE WORKING ON PERPETUAL MOTION. IM SORRY YOU CANT CLOWN ON UR DAD FOR RUINING HIS LIFE OVER PERPETUAL MOTION WHEN U DID LITERALLY THE EXACT SAME THING

anyway.

i do wonder if this is meant to imply that hermann was in fact actually working on a More ridiculous version of perpetual motion or if luca is just biased as hell against hermann. im banking on the latter there is no way in hell that luca is a reliable narrator considering all his memory issues + his general tendency to outright grab people hes mad at by the throat (<- fun fact we see this at least twice once in alvas backstory video and again in gattos backstory video. luca is the same across all timelines). also implications that hermann became an alcoholic. im guessing as a kid luca was told it was medicine and he hasnt put the pieces together?? or its ironic. idk could be either with him. i highly doubt its actually medicine. ALTHOUGH. theres an alternate explanation here; when luca says "swallow them down" i initially thought he was referring to hiding his "final feelings", since sometimes swallowing down feelings is a phrase used for that kind of thing. but potentially this could be implying that hermann had luca take some kind of medicine potentially to get rid of those feelings in some way?? personally i think its the former because we already know hermann was wasting his life and money so becoming an alcoholic would be an easy answer, but this is probably just because i dont have any answers if it were the latter. something to think about

now the third part, which gives us info about the next manor game!

so first the "gaunt old man" is (according to the wiki which i agree with in this case) mad eyes, which makes sense because mad eyes was involved in game 8/9 right before this and game 10 was filled with inventors + bonbon so it only makes sense he was there. no idea where he went though. whats more fun is that luca is now In The Fucking basement Walls where mad eyes used to be bc luca doesnt trust the rest of the participants. considering the "abnormal eyes" and that alva is here we know for sure that this is those related to the eye of darkness cult, which means ann is also definitely there. whats even more interesting is that this implies the existence of at least one more member of the eye of darkness cult whos going to be in this game; luca says "new participants" and "these people", and considering how specific the letters usually are with other things i would guess hed say "those two" if it were only ann and alva (of course its possible that theyre the only two have arrived at the writing of this journal, but considering he refers to a ritual coming up soon my money is on all the participants being of the cat cult except luca). luca makes a good note that this new game is likely the opposite of the previous and more focused on religion/spirituality which checks out w the participants, but DAMN hes an asshole about their writing style LMAO. sorry luca not everyone can have the same notes u do

the "brother in faith" guy here is alva, and i personally believe that he can in fact believe see through walls just bc thats funny as hell. just kidding its likely because luca is not as subtle he thinks he is because alva Literally Knows Him. other people might not be able to know hes there but like. that guys also a scientist. hed be able to figure out that theres someone in the walls AND he does in fact know luca. its difficult to tell bc of lucas memory issues but this probably also implies that alva looks very different from how he did in life (i doubt its as tall/etc as in his hunter form since thats what they all see when drugged not what he Actually looks like but im sure theres some stuff like his shorter hair/grayish skin/etc that carries across). i for one am fucking thrilled that theyre in a game together bc oh my god this is a time bomb and im just waiting to watch it explode (again).

as for the last line about a ritual... teehee. im very excited for whatever this is going to be and its killing me that this is the Only Information we have on it so far. likely we're going to have to wait for more alva and ann letters on this one, as well as whoever the third eye of darkness cult member is going to be, but i have no doubt that we'll have some more info eventually. if i had to take a guess its going to heavily affect how game 10-2/11 turns out; i highly doubt any ritual goes on without a sacrifice, and, well... theres only one guy here whos not already part of the cult. things are not looking great for lucas future.

[ilyasorokinn]

hii, can you write some angst to fluff for mat? like maybe they get in a fight, someone gets the silent treatment but they makeup at the end :)

GRAND ROMANTIC APOLOGY GESTURE

my favorite thing is angst to fluff. is that weird?

tw: mentions of the isles wags vests, two curse words (shit, hell)

when your fight had happened the day before he was supposed to leave for carolina, it was over something small and it really was pointless.

looking back as you watched game one in the series, it was pointless and you were regretting it, "it was so stupid." you ranted.

"what was it about?" emma asked.

you frowned, missing your friend and wanting her there in person, "he keeps leaving the dishes in the sink overnight and then they smell and i had a bad day so i overexagerated and it was stupid and now i regret it."

"and now he's not even there so you can't apologize." she completed your sentence.

"exactly." you nodded.

"well, there is a pretty crazy way you could apologize." she suggested.

"what are you thinking, emma beauvillier?" you asked, jokingly knowing she hated it.

"i hate it when you do that." she sighed.

you laughed, "all right, seriously, what are you thinking?"

"well, you could always surprise him." she suggested.

"surprise him in carolina?"

"well, yeah, i mean, he's not expecting it."

"and what if the game goes bad and they lose and he doesn't want to see me."

"then don't meet up with him and pretend you were never there."

"okay, that sounds awful."

"well, you never know if you don't try." she shrugged.

"fine, looking for flights to raleigh, north carolina." you grabbed your laptop and began your search.

by the next day, mid afternoon, you were sitting in the airport, anxiously waiting for your flight to board. somehow, you had found an easy flight from new york to raleigh, then from raleigh back to new york on quick notice.

when you landed on raleigh, you were greeted by the other emma, who had traveled with the team to support them. a few other girls were there, but they weren't aware of your surprise.

the day of the game, you got ready and were given your vest. when you found your seats with the rest of the other girls, they were all surprised to see you there.

"what're you doing here? thought you were staying home." you explained your story to the others, who found it hilarious.

the second period was almost over, like 30 seconds left almost over, and the game was still 2-1, canes in the lead. the canes caught the flying puck and threw it down, then another canes player shot it, hoping to shoot it to a teammate, but pelech was the one who caught it.

he skated past center ice, then shot it over to mat, who took the shot, with 21 seconds left, and shot it into the net and you jumped up, eyes wide with shock as you watched him skate around and get his high fives.

"holy shit!" you shouted, watching the replay on the big screen as he went down the bench and got high fives. you whipped out your phone and filmed the replay and the celly.

the game went into overtime, and the canes did end up winning, but all you could think about was mat's goal. the canes were winning the series, but ti was only game 2 and you had confidence in your boys.

you followed the other girls down to the tunnel and waited for them to come out of the locker room. one by one, they filed out.

mat finally came out and was talking to pierre. when pierre saw you, he smirked and that caught mat off guard and he followed pierre's line of sight over to you.

"what the hell?" he set his stuff down and wrapped his arms around you as you approached him, "what're you doing here?" pierre patted him on the back as he greeted his girlfriend.

"well, i felt like a douchebag on how we left things, so i deicded to surprise you and apologize."

"well, i can't stay mad at you when you fly out to surprise me in a big surprise gesture." he smiled, leaning down and meeting your lips.

"i'm really sorry mat." you pulled away, a frown on your face, "i didn't mean to go off on you. you didn't deserve that."

"all is forgiven." he couldn't stop smiling.

"and i'm also sorry about the loss."

"it's only game 2." he sounded hopeful and sad at the same time.

"you're gonna do it, i know it." you smiled, cupping his cheeks and kissing him again.

"thanks for surprising me." he hugged you again, leaning his head on your shoulder, "now let's get out of here before they kick us out." he set you down then wrapped an arm around your shoulders with one arm while the other held his bags.

"well, now we can let emma know her idea worked." you leaned your head on his shoulder.

"emma who? emma s? like, tito's emma?"

"yeah, she suggested this."

"well, let's send her a fruit basket or something."

you laughed, "i'll get right on that." you nodded.

[cassberry]

(Looking to watch 3rd Life, Last Life or Double Life? Here you go!)

If you are looking for a guide of some Limited Life episodes to catch up on for no particular reason at all (certainly not a new season being around the corner), I've got you covered!

Now I'm not going to lie, trying to curate this list for Limited Life broke me. The mechanics of this season meant that you gained time by killing other players and in doing so it felt like 50 things were happening all at once constantly across the server. As such I haven't been able to get absolutely everything onto this list, but I did try my best to get all the important events and a wide range of perspectives!

WARNING: Incredibly long read more where I go over why I picked certain POV's and what to expect. I do so love to ramble. Spoilers ahead!

SESSION ONE

Skizz - Breaking from tradition from recommending Grian first because you need to watch Skizz's POV first out of everyone unspoiled. The way things unraveled this episode felt like a sitcom in the best and worst ways lol 

Grian - Just a good solid first episode honestly and with the start of the Bad Boys™ how can you not love it. 

Scar -  I really have no words for whatever is the dynamic of the Clockers because you really just have to see it to understand. It’s a fun episode and as Scar, Cleo and Bdubs have set up near spawn, you always get to see something interesting. 

Big B - Big B’s episodes are always a treat as he does super long ones that give you a little more insight into what's happening on the server, rather than just the big events. But if you wanted something specific to watch, his last 10 minutes of this episode were a blast. 

SESSION TWO

Joel - Bad Boys Bread Bridge was both the most amazing and ugliest build on the server and I’m so glad it was made. Also Joel gets some amazing kills this episode that are so tense to watch. 

Martyn - Look this one is here because of a little personal bias. Martyn shouts me out in the episode so I couldn’t not add it lol It’s also a very good episode in of itself in that it introduces the Mean Gills and I’ll always be a Mean Gills supporter. Also that Tilly roast? oof 

Pearl - Pearl is constantly on the move this episode and living up to her Nosy Neighbour title so watch her episode if you want some good gossip and to see the lay of the land. 

Tango - Tango always delivers a solid episode and as he was building the TIES Tower a majority of the time he receives a lot of foot traffic through the area creating some fun interactions. 

SESSION THREE

Scar - And in this episode of Limited Life, Scar rediscovers the joys of minecart TNT. 

Impulse - Impulse is such a fun boogey to watch, and the way he edited this episode around his thought process of who to kill was great. 

Grian - Kind of a different episode this session as Grian was sick so he was afk the entire time. It was very very very funny to watch, but as he wasn’t interacting with anyone you’re going to miss a lot of context if you only watch his POV. You should still give this a watch though! 

Joel - Watching poor Joel run around after Grian trying to keep him safe was incredibly entertaining lmao 

SESSION FOUR

Scott - I believe Grian said it best, but this session felt like a final session with the way the yellows were chasing after the greens. It was pure chaos the entire time and Scott beautifully evading them all until his descent into yellow was perfection. 

Tango - Tango is here for the same reason as Scott but as the last green the final hunt for him was terrifying to watch. 

Cleo - I love Cleo’s episodes and this one was just a joy. She was slightly sick this week but I feel like that only lowered her inhibitions to do some out of pocket stuff. 

Jimmy - The exciting saga of Judge Judy and Executioner continues in Jimmy’s episode this week and if you didn’t know anything about it, that's ok! Neither did anyone else on the server except for Jimmy, Pearl and Big B lmao consider this the best episode to watch if you want this plotline covered. 

SESSION FIVE 

Etho - Considering the episode starts off with Etho having to babysit Bdubs, then an awkward family dinner and an explosive game of catch, I really couldn’t have asked for a better Etho video. 

Big B - This session was a lot more calm than the previous, so there was a lot more alliance talk happening. Big B has a great perspective on all that as he and Pearl get up to a tonne of mischief that causes some problems with some alliances they already had. 

Scott - Once again this was an alliance building week and Scott’s episode really highlights some of the more fun things that happened to make and break some relationships. 

Grian - Poor Bread Bridge o7 you will be missed. Thankfully M-Rye 5 was there at the end to rain chaos from above. (<-sentences that make no sense out of context) 

SESSION SIX 

Cleo & Pearl - I couldn’t choose between either of these two this session. Both Cleo and Pearl were out sick so they handed over their accounts to two other players. I won’t spoil who they are but these episodes were amazing. 

Jimmy - The Bad Boys were going through it this week goddamn lol It never stops being funny how much of a mess everything becomes when they get together. 

Martyn - It was his birthday this session and he’s just a little guy! Surely nothing would go wrong at his birthday party? And certainly not caused by him! 

Tango - The last half of Tango’s episode is just a comical amount of deaths that only get funnier and funnier as the time between them shortens. 

SESSION SEVEN

Skizz - Oh Skizz. You are too good for this world. His ending for this episode was heartbreaking and Affirmation Station will live on in my heart forever.

Scott - I love watching Scott run around the map and hunt people down because he is so good at the game! I believe he had the highest kill count this session and I loved every minute of it. 

Joel - (Major Spoilers) Ah Joel it just wasn’t meant to be! But hearing the desperation in his voice grow higher and higher as the clock ticked down was nail biting. Scar - Just a good Scar episode honestly! Shows what the Clockers are up to during all the chaos and a great view of the server devolving into anarchy.

SESSION EIGHT 

Martyn - WOOOO YESSSS LETS GOOOOOO (<- does that count as spoilers???)

I distinctly remember being on the edge of my seat this whole episode and Martyn delivers in every way possible for a fantastic final episode of the season. 

Impulse - I haven’t mentioned it yet but Impulse’s editing this season went wild and it's none more apparent than in this episode. He and his team went crazy for the finale. 

Etho - Such a fun episode!! The twist at the end with the diamond sword coming into play was everything I could have wanted and more. 

Pearl - It was really a toss up between Pearl and Scott for this last spot, but I loved her perspective for the one last minigame on the server. 

BONUS 

Bdubs - Do you have a spare 12 hours to dedicate to Limited Life? Then oh boy does Bdubs have a video for you! Instead of weekly videos he decided to collate all his episodes into one mammoth video which was an absolute blast to watch over a weekend! It’s a really interesting POV to watch because when LimLife was airing Bdubs would just appear all over the map and we never had any idea what he was doing so it was awesome to have some concrete evidence of his shenanigans. Definitely give this one a watch if you’re in the mood for a marathon! 

IN SUMMARY…

I swear if the next season is as messy as this one, I think I’m going to have to start taking notes when it's airing because I think this took years off my life haha if you think I’ve missed anything please tag it because I would love to see it! I definitely could have added more POV’s per session like I did with the Last Life and 3rd Life guides, but I think a more curated list helps keep down the overwhelming nature of trying to watch a million Limited Life episodes. 

But really, I loved watching Limited Life live so I’m glad I give myself an excuse each new season to go back and watch the season over again. There are so many little foreshadowed moments that you don’t see on the first watch and honestly it all just makes me more excited for the new season! Thanks for reading <3