#and he's doing it by being the sort of old fashioned movie star that doesn't really exist anymore

[amostexcellentblog]

She's a phenomenon, she's Hollywood's latest It Girl, she's everywhere, she's having the time of her life.

She's embracing her inner Theater Kid, on stage at The Lion King, she's in full Pumba costume singing "Hakuna Matata."

She's on Jimmy Kimmel Live reminding us about all the badass stunts she's done.

She's the belle of the Oscar Nominees Luncheon.

She's The Last Movie Star.

She singlehandedly saved Cinema.

Everyone wants to be her. Everyone wants to be with her.

She's got a point, she's an icon, she's a legend, and she is the moment.

**The "She" in question is a 60 year old man who's been famous longer than I've been alive.

[jamiesfootball]

Okay I have treats I should be answering, but since I typed it all out anyways-

*rips open trench coat*

Here's the list of Jamie AUs I have puttering around in the brain:

-Jamie-is-Zava AU! In which Jamie never gets traded to Richmond. Instead he ends up at a different club, one that's meaner AND within driving distance of Manchester. Because this is Jamie, he never stops battling, and within three years he is an angry shell of the person but also an absolute killer as a striker. His relationship with his dad is also the worst its ever been. So the entire league is stunned - stunned! - when one Leslie Higgins runs into him in the bathroom during a match and jokingly says, "I don't supposed you'd ever want to play for a team like Richmond" and Jamie Tartt agrees! (Men really do be giving each other jobs in bathrooms)

-hockey Jamie! (this is based on nothing I just like hockey jerseys and ice skating)

-figure skater!girl!Jamie (based off someone’s previous post about a girl jamie getting pushed into it by her dad) Again, ice skates. outfits. but now also with music. Also Jamie being stuck in another high-control environment. Ough.

-bartender Jamie! He got injured in the academy and, well, bars are really the only other place his dad ever dragged him, so it was easy enough to get a job, wasn't it? And it's not like he doesn't get tipped well. He's a handsome lad and great at charming people (makes him uncomfortable sometimes when it's the older women flirting with him, but he doesn't like to think about that much)

-bartender Jamie again! This time with an accompanying Roy Kent who is also a bartender because neither of them 'made it out.' Roy is a tired, overworked line cook who has had it up to HERE with this new guy who works the front of house. Makes him want to spit in the guy's shift meal, but he'd never do that to the food (which he at least respects). And well, sometimes the guy looks a little desperate about the shift meal. Roy's been there - was there the whole time he was helping his sister with Phoebe while she was getting her nursing degree. Didn't mean he signed up to teach him to cook. But they did just lose another line cook. Fuck.

-lawyer jamie! He wants to make sure people like his dad don’t happen to other people. He brings a very Boston Legal energy to Roy's The Practice energy. Keeley is a paralegal. Rebecca owns the firm now. Ted is HR.

-criminal profiler Jamie! Going full Criminal Minds here people! Heavy on the themes, and the whole 'using your trauma to profile the unsub' thing, and the 'we don't profile each other (except for when we do)

-CSI Jamie! But it’s the fake CSI where they are borderline detectives and he keeps getting threatened/kidnapped. He is basically the Nick Stokes of the crew

-Rockstar Jamie! He got famous because of his face but he actually IS talented! But they won’t let him play any ‘real’ music and he has loads of anger he’d like to scream about thanks. He's always wanted to work with Roy Kent, but Roy's old band notoriously broke up in the messiest fucking manner and Roy's been working in a limited, behind the scenes fashion ever since (and fucking loathes the sort of music Jamie makes).

-Movie star Jamie! He’s a palatable actor, but what he secretly really wants to do is direct. Meanwhile former indie-darling director Roy who had a string of failures got low-balled into directing this run-of-the-mill drama. When the first actor dropped out without warning, Keeley called in a favor to get her somewhat-famous ex-boyfriend to star in it instead and he will not. stop. giving. Roy. notes.

-Bonus AU mentions:

-Jaeger pilot Jamie (Pacific Rim au)

-Hitter turned hacker Jamie (Leverage au - I have a whole tag for it)

-Dead Jamie (The Good Place au) - he is fairly sure he is not supposed to be in The Good Place and is white knuckling it so he doesn't get caught. Ted is Michael. Chaos ensues.

[dazed-nymphsss]

⋆·˚ ༘ * 𝙝𝙤𝙬 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙮 𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙩 𝙮𝙤𝙪

┕━» stranger things holy trinity x gn!reader

❕warnings❕: drug use (weed), fluff, some sexual innuendos, comfort

a/n: been having a hard time recently so not only is this entirely self indulgent, but this is also for some other people having a bad time, so I hope I can help

『•• stranger things characters comforting you ••』

not proof read at all.

steve harrington

hot drinks, teakwood candles, grandpa sweaters, stars, and old film

steve has a radar for this sort of thing. he can pick up on emotions at the drop of a hat, so the moment he sees you, he knows something is up.

he'll start with just wrapping his arms around you, a simple gesture, but he'll hold you as long as you need. he'll hold you for hours, his gentle touch running through your hair.

if tears are rolling out of your eyes, he'll wipe each of them away gingerly, whispering small sweet things, "oh, honey," he'd say, voice sickeningly intoxicating, "no tears."

in true mama steve fashion, he would make you your favorite meal, along with some hot tea or some hot cocoa, whichever you prefer, and wrap you up in a nice cozy sweater.

he would search through his most treasured VHS tapes to find the perfect comfort film, turning it on and sitting down next to you on the couch.

eventually, sleep will find you, and when steve finally notices, he simply pulls the blanket over you more and gets more comfortable, soon joining you in sleep.

eddie munson

the smell of weed, colorful quilted blankets, fast food, and metal music

he would kiss every single one of your tears away

you would come to him in a wreck, and he would be frantic trying to figure out what was wrong, hating to see you in pain.

he would be quick to work you out of your clothes and stuff you in his own, dressing you carefully, placing kisses as he put the shirt over your head and pulled up the sweatpants over your hipbones.

much like steve, he would hold you until you felt alright, or at least until you felt comfortable enough to tell him what was wrong.

he would talk you through it. every step of the way. he would help and give advice or just sit and listen, if that's what you needed.

gentle words of affection and gentle touches

eddie is the kind of guy who offers you a cigarette or a joint to calm your nerves, whether you accept or decline he's 100% alright with him.

(doesn't mean he won't spark up himself)

would offer a scary movie and some food to help you through it, along with some music on standby if that's what you wanted.

would absolutely slow dance with you in the living room and just hold you, rubbing your back and telling you just how perfect you were to him.

billy hargrove

cigarettes, jean jackets, and the smell of leather seats

billy isn't one for comforting others, so he'd just think of what calmed him down, and that was late-night drives.

He would hug you and throw his jacket over your shoulders before giving you a kiss on the forehead and a sly smile, "wanna go for a ride?"

would drive you where ever you want, and if you didn't know, he would give some suggestions.

Music from the radio playing softly as the windows are rolled down, one hand holding yours and the other on the steering wheel.

When the car would stop you would talk for hours, working through everything to a point where you felt at least a little better getting things off your chest.

therapist billy is canon.

To anyone else, he would tell them to grow up and stop being such a pussy. But with you, he actually cared and wanted to see you happy.

if there was someone who was bothering you, he would most definitely make a plan to beat the shit out of them, and if it were a girl, he has many many friends who would do it for him.

(with your consent of course, if you didn't want to start a problem, he would respect your wishes... maybe.)

would possibly propose some... alternative comforting techniques that he would be more than up for.

I know, I know, this one is really short but I have something in the works, but let's hope I don't jinx it and just never finish writing it. Love you guys.

[antianakin]

what are your opinions on the sequels? specifically how luke (and his new jedi order) is portrayed. but also like just the jedi stuff in general, the training and everyone becoming force ghosts and somehow palpatine

Oh gosh, it has been a MINUTE since I've even watched the Sequels. I'm planning on rewatching them sometime early next year for Reasons, but for both episodes 8 and 9, it'll be the first time I've seen them since I saw them in the theaters. I MIGHT have seen episode 7 after its theater release, but not often. I can definitely say I haven't watched a single one of them since 2019 lol.

All of that to say, I don't remember them super well. I liked episode 7, but didn't care AT ALL for TLJ and was ho hum on TROS. My overall opinion is that it's too bad these characters didn't have anyone writing for them who seemed to actually CARE about them at any point and that nobody bothered to create a fucking blueprint for the entire trilogy and then stick to it. Say what you will about the execution of the Prequels, but Lucas had a damn vision in mind and a clear end goal for the story and the characters and he STUCK TO IT. You can go back to those films and rewatch them and find that story and see the arc he was trying to take the characters on. You may not LIKE what he chose to do or feel like it worked very well, but it's clearly THERE. The same cannot be said for the Sequels. The characters change personalities in basically every film, the primary motivations and intended end goals for them are never consistent, the relationships aren't built up well, and the theme and message of the Sequels is so muddied with all of these changes that they may as well not exist.

All of that is very broad, though, and doesn't touch much on your specific question about the Jedi and Luke and how they were portrayed in the Sequels. To be honest, I don't remember it very well, and when I saw these films, I was a pretty casual Star Wars fan who was still what I would now consider Jedi critical. I didn't hate them by any means, but I had absorbed the fandom osmosis of the Jedi having been too repressive/old-fashioned and how they caused their own doom. So I haven't watched them from a more pro Jedi lens yet in order to comment on it with any level of authority.

What I DO remember feeling was that making Luke bitter was a bad choice. There's undoing a character a little in order to allow them to develop somewhere, and then there's complete and utter character assassination and TLJ's characterization of Luke falls closer to the latter for me. The biggest thing anyone remembers about Luke is that he chose not to kill Anakin in ROTJ. That's his big climactic triumph. He goes on an entire journey towards understanding Anakin and having to accept that Anakin was a person making evil choices so that he could believe in Anakin's ability to be BETTER. That's kind-of the core of Luke's WHOLE JOURNEY. So I don't really get the entire concept of Luke reacting so violently to "feeling some darkness" in his teenaged nephew. He's already sort-of worked through that particular flaw of his and overcome it, why is he suddenly reacting this way? What's the point of that? And why would Luke just completely lose himself to cynicism and bitterness in the aftermath of that kind of failure? What was the point of leaving a piece of map behind or whatever? None of it really seems to make any sense to me and you can just FEEL Rian Johnson sort-of tossing things in the trash as he wrote this so that he could do his own thing.

All of that being said, what I've seen other people comment on is that there's a lot of shit Luke says in TLJ that are pretty anti-Jedi, but that the whole point is that Luke is wrong. Luke is succumbing to despair and so he feels like he's defeated and there's no point to anything and he's WRONG. The movie does pretty strongly emphasize that he's WRONG to feel this way and act like this. So I think a lot of people take what Luke says in this film sort-of at face value without taking into account that context that you're not SUPPOSED to agree with him any more than Rey does. I'm interested to see how I feel about it when I do end up rewatching them in a few months, but it rings relatively true to what I can remember.

It doesn't seem wrong that Luke and Leia could end up being able to ghost, it doesn't make any sense that Han can ghost but we all know that that happened specifically because Carrie Fisher died mid-filming and they had to figure out how to work around that, so I'm willing to give a little bit of slack to TROS for that exact reason.

I don't remember much training even HAPPENING on screen. I remember Luke barely teaching Rey anything at all in the one week she spends with him and Leia sending Rey on an obstacle course at the beginning of TROS. I wish they'd chosen to spend more time really showcasing more of Rey's actual training (or, ya know, FINN training in Force abilities at all), but I don't have any strong feelings about it at this point.

And as for Palpatine, I think everybody knows it was a bad choice to make at this point. It was lazy, it was silly, and it doesn't work. It feels like a direct response to Snoke having been killed off too early and disagreements between the directors and the studio execs about whether Kylo Ren should be a villain or not. It doesn't work and nobody likes it.

So, yeah, my feelings are a little faded at this point because I disliked them enough that when I do my Star Wars marathons, I never include the Sequels in it and I just stop at ROTJ. I feel like that says enough on its own.

[virologikal]

𝐅𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐨𝐦 𝐀𝐬𝐤 𝐆𝐚𝐦𝐞

@nshtn requested: 3, 5, 10, 17 for Wesker (I love your Wesker takes too ahh)

⸻ ⸨ Thank you for the many questions you sent in and I am glad you like my takes so far! I hope you don't mind me splitting some of the questions up in multiple posts so I can better tag them to the relevant characters ⸩

𝐖𝐄𝐒𝐊𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐎𝐌 𝐀𝐒𝐊𝐒:

3 - NoTP? I don't really have a strict NoTP for Wesker (or any characters, to be honest - I think all dynamics can be interesting to explore depending on how it's done and what the focus is). However, if we are talking about some form of intimacy or even trust at some point, I'd say the least likely I could see him with is Excella. I'm happy to be convinced otherwise, but from my point of view it feels like she is merely a tool to him, and he doesn't exactly hold her in high regards rather than consider her both useful and ... nice to be around, probably? She is gorgeous and ambitious, and clearly admires him to a point where it would cater to his ego, but I doubt he'd be interested in anything more than that.

5 - Out of all your fanworks that include Wesker, which is your favourite? When it comes to writing, definitely my fanfic The Unquiet Grave, because I get to explore his character both in past settings as well as think of ways to bring him into the current game lore. I just like prodding this character like a bug under a microscope. Otherwise, my fanart for him referencing a quote from Hannibal (TV series) is likely my current favorite. It took me roughly a month to finish, and is the only piece I currently have of just Wesker (I just love to paint Chris and Wesker together tbh^^)

10 - What's your favourite piece of fanart for Wesker? Honestly? Impossible to decide. There are so many amazing pieces of fanwork out there, be it in writing or art. I have a few pieces an old friend did back when we used to roleplay which they did for my portrayal and that I still hold very dear and close to my heart, so maybe those stick out a bit. But otherwise - I can't possibly decide on just one thing. All art or edits you find on this blog that I reblogged count as favorites, I'd say!

17 - What's a book, movie, or show you think Wesker would like? Funny enough, I have a headcanon post in the making that pertains to how Wesker perceives media (since there is a recurring theme of him not getting some media related jokes etc.)

To make it brief for the moment: In my interpretation of him, prior to the Mansion Incident he doesn't have time (or take the time) to really sit down and enjoy a tv show or movie, due to the many tasks on his hand. He has to juggle his work for Umbrella, his double-agent plans to leave them and take the research with him, lead the S.T.A.R.S. team as captain without attracting suspicion and at least pretend to have a social life of some capacity.

Once he starts spending time with Chris, he eventually lets him distract him and he actually sits down with him to do "regular person" things (at least for a while, until Umbrella informs him about their plan to use S.T.A.R.S. as test subjects during the Mansion Incident). During this time I imagine Wesker's interests would likely be directed towards anything sci-fi, due to the scientific approach to fictional settings in many shows or movies. Maybe not exactly Star Trek level (though Wesker being a Trekkie is a hilarious crack headcanon), but I'm thinking Event Horizon, Total Recall and, yes, Matrix (we simply cannot ignore the fashion inspiration of RE5 Wesker okay).

As for books, he definitely is an avid reader in my portrayal. Of course mostly scientific works, but also works about human studies (mostly so he could build up knowledge about interpersonal relationships, manipulation tactics, etc.). His special interest in my portrayal being sealife and diving, he would also read a lot about that, including sharks, as I also headcanon he considered Neptune as some sort of "pet".

[thenightling]

The Satanic Panic (the unwelcome 80s throw-back)

Everything from the 1980s has made a come back. From LP records replacing CDs, to films like Beetlejuice and Ghostbusters. And literature like The Vampire Lestat (published in 1985) and Neil Gaiman's The Sandman (1988). And Broadway musicals based on 80s movies. Even skinny jeans for men made a come back. And late 80 Goth fashion. These are all great, fun, Nostalgic things. But... something else made a come back. The infamous Satanic Panic. If you're unfamiliar with the 80s Satanic Panic it wasn't all about thinking there were Satanists everywhere. It was sort of a blanket term for a rise in anti-semitism, anti-witchcraft, homophobia, and a weird surge in ped0pheila paranoia. When you think of the 80s Satanic Panic you think of the religious zealots burning Dungeons & Dragons tabletop role playing game manuals or thinking they hear Satanic messages in Heavy Metal albums or the extremely ignorant claiming that non-Abrahmic religions (or even Judaism) are actually worshipping Satan. I saw this make a disturbing comeback just yesterday when someone joined my The Sandman Facebook group with the rant that The Star of David is actually a Satanic symbol and has nothing to do with David. If you didn't grow up during The Satanic Panic you may have entirely missed the Ped0phelia aspect of it, which may have been worse than the claims that Satanists were / are secretly everywhere. It was a leap in logic that the Satanists are up to evil, and what is more evil than the sexual abuse and exploitation of children? So people started to imagine there were ped0philes everywhere, running daycare centres, or eccentric ex-boyfriends. Or LGBTQAI+ teenagers who came out of the closet were suddenly suspected of being a ped0 because if the person isn't straight, a very ignorant "friend" or family member might suddenly decide that the gay person is attracted to everyone of their gender, including children. The impact of the 80s Satanic Panic can still be felt. Innocent people, including Day Care Center owners, were convicted and couldn't get their verdicts over turned for decades. A bad breakup and a few whispers in her ear could lead to a mother believing the worst about her ex-husband without any evidence. There were cases of children being coached without the coachers even realizing that's what they were doing because the adults asked the children so many times in so many ways about sexual abuse that they were sure must have happened, that the kids just started saying what they thought their parents or grandparents wanted to hear. This was the era of "Stranger Danger." And it never quite stopped.

The ped0phelia paranoia is particularly strange. Do NOT take this to mean I am claiming Ped0phelia doesn't happen or isn't a real threat or that victims who come forward should be ignored. No. However, Q-anon revived this paranoia with things like "All Democrats are secretly ped0philes." "Hillary Clinton leads a Ped0phile ring." "The ped0philes in Washington and Hollywood are using the blood of children to unnaturally retain their youth. As far fetched as that sounds, people believe it. There was even that one guy who was so convinced that there was a secret dungeon under a pizza parlor that he showed up heavily armed and when he found out there was no basement he surrendered himself to police. Former rock star turned Hollywood composer, Danny Elfman, was recently accused of decades old sexual harassment but because of "catchy" headlines lots of people seemed to think he must have r8ped someone. Some people even dusted off his old Oingo Boingo song, "Little Girls" as proof of his perversion even though the song was actually intended to shame and call out Hollywood executives who would take advantage of underage girls. It wasn't the smoking gun they seemed to think it was. It was an anti-sexual abuse song. Much like how in the 1980s Pat Benatar's "Hell is for Children" (an anti-child abuse anthem) was mistaken as Satanist / pro-child abuse somehow... (Lyric comprehension / media literacy is haaaard). For over thirty-years we have lived in the comfortable myth of "Ha, people were silly in the past!" and then it started to happen again. People saw Satanists and ped0philes everywhere again in a strange spike in social paranoia, perhaps as a subconscious (and very bigoted) rebellion against the social changes happening such as more LGBTQAI+ rights and openness. You might think you're immune because you're a democrat with an open mind and statistically usually the people who fall for these things are... well... Qanon... But you are not immune. Anyone can fall for these sort of things. If you ever decided someone "looks like a pervert" because of how they dress, or you have started to humor the gossip and rumors about your "creepy neighbor"... maybe stop and remember it was "Normal" and "reasonable people" who took part in the Salem witch Hunts.

If you know someone who sees Satanism everywhere that isn't pious Christianity or a smaller non-Abrahamic religion, than know that it's not that big of a leap in logic for them to start making sexual (particularly ped0phile) accusations. I dare say this is even tied to the conservative anti-trans movement sprinkled with accusations of "grooming." This is one 80s fad I wish would die... again.

[peakyscillian]

Treat you better | Cillian x Fem!Reader |

(gif by @nofckingfighting)

Summary: you're cast as Tommy's new love interest in Peaky Blinders, meaning you have to do all kinds of scenes with Cillian who you know well from the movie/tv circuit, your boyfriend who isn't supportive is jealous. Warnings: Language, hints smut ofc! unhealthy relationship, mentions of abuse nothing graphic. Request: No. A/N: Me & @missymurphy1985 were discussing Cillian being cocky about getting to film steamy scenes with peoples girlfriends and I HAD to make a story out of it, but I got carried away as usual!

Treat you better.

masterlist You were sick of trying to convince your boyfriend to come to cast parties with you, to be honest you usually had more fun without him there, but this one was important you had landed yourself a role in the BBC gangster drama Peaky Blinders as Tommy Shelby's new love interest, it went down well with viewers, so you would be a recurring character. It wasn't that Jude was possesive, he was just jealous of the attention you got, from anyone not just other men, he certainly didn't like the fact you and Cillian filmed steamy scenes and kissed alot during Peaky. "Jude just come for a few drinks, it will be fun, I really want you there" you were busy packing your bag in the kitchen of your Manchester apartment, your car would be arriving in a few minutes. Jude was drinking from his coffee mug, dressed ready for his day in the office, he was glaring at you, of course he was, he'd read over your lines for today's filming and the scenes were highly detailed sex scenes. "I'm not coming to some party when you've been fucking your co-star all day" he huffed, placing his mug into the sink filling it with water. That infuriated you, just wash it up! you always wanted to scream but never did. You rolled your eyes, shoving your feet into your beat up trainers. "There is literally masses of padding between us and the scenes are shot so quickly, I'm not exactly riding him all day!" you exclaimed you were exhausted having to explain yourself again. Jude rolled his eyes, picking up his bag "I'll see you when you get home, if you insist on going" You sighed he was getting on your last nerve "Yes, you will. My cars here, have a good day" You grabbed your things, not looking at him as you left your apartment. *** You were sat legs spread across Cillian's thighs, the padding in your underwear was so uncomfortable, Cillian's hand were on your back as you listened to Anthony's directions, Cillian was topless, the old fashioned briefs he had on were a sight to behold, you knew for a fact he was more of a Calvin Klein man. "You okay love? seem a bit off today" he asked as you looked down at him, you let your arm drop over his shoulder as you waited for Anthony and the crew to change a few things. "Jude being a jerk again" you shifted on his lap, you were going to have to sort out this uncomfortable situation in a second. Cillian sucked in a breath as you moved, you caught his eye, neither of you said anything. "Doesn't like me much does he?" Cillian chuckled trying to distract you both. "Not really" you frowned, you knew the feeling was mutual on Cillian's side as well. Cillian had started rubbing circles on your bare back, you were relaxing into the feeling, it was nice to be touched in such a caring way, then Anthony was ready breaking the moment. You were flipped onto the bed as Cillian switched into Tommy, his accent a broad birmingham hum in your ear as he hitched your leg up by his hip, his briefs discarded, your underwear long gone. "I could treat you better" he whispered in your ear, no one on set would have heard, it was just adding to the scene, the fact he was whispering in your ear. You eyes locked with his, you nodded, knowing it was true, you gripped his arms as the padding covering his quite obvious erection hit against the same padding covering you, you were lost in his eyes as he played out the scene. Moans were leaving both of your mouths, neither of you sure if they were an act or real, his hand was roaming over your body, lips against your ear. "Leave him" he whispered, hand cupping your face, you were biting your lip was he being serious? *** You hadn't managed to talk to Cillian after your scene together, he had be ushered off to another part of the set and you had appointments for interviews, hair and make-up for the party later. You couldn't stop thinking about it throughout the interview with a magazine, so distracted you could'nt remember what you had said, now you were sat in your trailer, hair being blow-dried and styled, make up being applied. 'I'll be there later,

for one drink then we can leave Jx' You didn't bother replying how dare he think he could tell you what to do? You'd be staying for as many drinks as you wanted, thank you very much. The knock on your trailer came just as you were struggling with the zip on your desk, you'd let your personal assistant leave to go get herself ready for the evening without even thinking about how you'd get your dress done up. You held the front up as you called for the person to come in, Cillian appeared in the door way, in a fitted suit, he always looked good in his Tommy Shelby suits but a more modern suit was made for him. "Need help?" he asked stepping behind you as you nodded suddenly lost for words. He zipped up the fitted black dress, hands lingering on your skin "I mean what I said earlier" You nodded grabbing for the necklace on the vanity table, he took it from your hands, you lifted your hair off your neck. "I know" you didn't at the time but now it was just both of you here in this tiny trailer you were sure of it. Cillian done the clasp of the necklace up, his hands running down your arms, lips just ghosting across the skin of your back in between your shoulder blades, you leant back against his chest, letting his lips slip onto the side of your neck, hands still on your arms. "We can't" he muttered against your skin, with a gentle kiss to your neck, turning to you to kiss your lips, he pulled away. "Come on Murphy lets get out of here" you tried to break the tension, grabbing your bag and phone, he held the door open for you letting you step from the trailer first, to the car you would be sharing. *** Cillian had hardly left your side, apart from now when he had been pulled for a quick press interview in the lobby, Natasha made her way over a smirk on her face. "He's like a lost puppy y/n, what have you done to him eh?" she handed you a full glass of wine. "Fuck, Tash we kissed" you groaned feeling embarrassed that you had let it happen when you were in a relationship. "You did?" she was shocked she knew your relationship with Jude wasn't great but this was big. You nodded sipping from your wine, as the door to the hall opened and Jude stepped in, still dressed in his work suit he spotted you instantly, you gave Natasha a look she smiled at you. "It's fine y/n, it was a small kiss" she shrugged before leaving you as Jude approached. A small kiss and the things he said. *** Jude was huffing beside you as you spoke to a few other co-stars, you'd tried your hardest to include him but he was being stubborn and rude, you dragged him over to the side of the room. "Why are you being so rude?" you hissed, he rolled his eyes. "I told you, I didn't want to come" he was on edge you could tell, but really you didn't want to end your night. "Honestly Jude just go home, you obviously don't want to support me" You were tired of this behaviour from him. Before he could say anything Cillian had approached you both, you smiled at him slightly. "Hey Jude, nice to see you man" he extended his hand, Jude laughed lightly. "Like fucking my girl huh?" Jude asked, you groaned not this again. "Oh yeah, does she moan really loud with you, or is that just for me?" Cillian was smirking, your head snapped round to face him. You could see Jude clenching his fists by his side, Cillian could sense his frustration, but he couldn't help himself. "Those moves as well, have you ever experienced any of them?" Cillian was adding fuel to Jude's internal anger. "Fuck this" Jude grabbed your arm "We're going" he spat pushing past Cillian. You tugged your arm away from him in the lobby "Let me go, you need to lighten up" Jude had snapped, his hand was clenching at your jaw "I said we're fucking leaving" You were trying to prise his fingers from you face "I want to stay, I'm not leaving with you when you're like this" His grip was tightening, your heart hammering, of course the lobby was bloody empty now, everyone in the main hall enjoying themselves. "Hey! Hey! get the fuck off her" The unmistakeable

South London accent flooded the lobby, as Paul came flying over from the main doors of the hall. Jude didn't let go as he turned round, pulling you with him, your eyes found Pauls, he nodded slowly at you just to let you know it was going to be ok. "I think you will find he said get off her" Joe was by Pauls side now, it was like the Shelby brothers had come to your rescue all you needed was Cillian. Jude was squeezing your jaw, you were sure there would be bruises to cover up in the make-up chair tomorrow. "I fucking come here and everyone is a fucking cunt to me?" Jude was being unreasonable, you were still trying to pull his fingers off your face. Paul was trying to reason with him, not wanting him to hurt you anymore than he already was, Joe was trying to pull you away. "Jude please" you almost whispered, he turned your head so he could look at you. "Please what? please forgive you for being a slut? sleeping with the whole cast?" he spat

"I hav-" "shut the fuck up ok?" he was fuming, his face turning a deep purple red. That was enough for Paul to launch himself at Jude yanking at his arm to get it off your face. "What the fuck is going on" Cillian's Irish accent suddenly bellowed through the lobby. "You need to get him away from me, I will kill him" Jude finally let go of you, pushing you backwards, you stumbled both Cillian and Joe grabbing for you before you hit the floor. "Jude just leave, be out of my apartment by the time I get back, we're done" you were close to tears, you felt humiliated, Cillian was leading you to a separate room, as Paul made sure Jude was out of the building.

*** Cillian had managed to get some ice for your face, the unmistakeable finger prints across your jaw were looking painful already.

"Fuck, I'm so sorry I shouldn't of wound him up" Cillian sighed, pressing the cool cloth to your jaw.

You shook your head "I shouldn't of invited him" your eyes fell to the floor as you whinced in pain.

"You shouldn't even be with him, is he always like that?" Cillian was concerned, of course he had feelings for you but right now he was worried about you.

You nodded not saying a word, you were so embarrassed that you were still with Jude even after everything. "If he's in a good mood he's different" you tried to reason. Cillian sighed, lightly lifting your head up with his finger under your chin "No, he shouldn't get to chose a good or bad mood and act like that, jesus christ if you're in a bad mood go to the pub with your mates, go listen to loud music, don't assult your girlfriend at a work event" The tears finally spilled over, Cillian was caressing your cheek, his eyes full of concern, you nodded slowly. "I know, I've just never been strong enought to leave him" you were sobbing now Cillian was brushing the tears from your cheeks "You have now, if you mean what you said out there about being done" You bit your lip "I did, not because of what happened between me and you, I understand if that wasn't true, I just fuck feel so humiliated, I should of just left with him" Cillian took a seat on the table next to you, pulling you gently into his side "I'm glad you didn't leave with him, I meant everything I said y/n you deserve so much more than him, I'm not saying that's me but you definitely don't need to stay with a jerk like him" "What if I want it to be you?" you whispered, you couldn't believe you were saying this, just moments ago you broke up with your boyfriend, but really hadn't it been over since the first time he laid a hand on you? Cillian smiled, pushing some of your hair behind your ear "then we can take things as slow as you need, I've wanted you since the moment you walked into the Garrison as Rose and slapped Tommy" he laughed thinking about the first scene you had ever done with him. You giggled lightly, head falling onto his shoulder "Can we leave? I don't want to face anyone, tonight anyway" you grimaced at the thought.

Cillian nodded, cupping your cheek placing the smallest kiss to your lips "You can stay at mine tonight, I have a guest room" he smiled. You stood up from the table "who said I needed the guest room?" you smirked feeling a sudden wave of confidence wash over you, your hand ghosting across the crotch of his suit trousers. "I was trying to be a gentleman" he laughed grabbing your hand, pressing it onto his semi-hard cock through the material, before he took your hand to lead you out to the car. *** So this definitely needs a part two. *** Taglist @missymurphy1985 @janelongxox @queenshelby @being-worthy @noctvrnalmoth @cloudofdisney @elenavampire21 @datewithgianni @magicalpieex @uchihacumdump

[yakourinka]

after reading my nth "stop making fun of the mind-controlled dalmatians pushing cruella's mom off a cliff it's so obvious you didn't watch the movie!!" post

I actually did go and watch the movie and now I have thoughts

- the aesthetics? incredible. anachronistic. you can just smell the marketing guy's cologne on them. we're in some vague year in the 1970s - and you don't do weird and gay in 1970s! women don't get to be at the top unless they're complete monsters married to old money, Emma Thompson's character says! - BUT as is the Way of the Mouse, the subtext remains an unfinished little squeak

- was Cruella being the poor kid at the posh school, her mom saying you belong here as anyone else supposed to be a critique of classism? maybe. every attempt this movie makes at not being shallow is one throwaway line from some character that the movie never bothers to develop

-more on that: the memed I am woman, hear me roar scene is from Cruella monologuing about how life sucks as a woman in the 70s; Artie makes a one-time remark about the vitriol they face for being out and "not normal" in the character's own words; the Baroness says a few things about women having to be absolute monsters to get anywhere. there's something in the movie, some sort of message. it just fizzles out as soon as it shows up and you end up with this shallow - but fun - ride

- this isn't a feminist movie. not even a ~~feminist grrrlllboss~~ movie. it doesn't really attempt to be imo. it is a cool and fun show, and most of the cast is white, and the gayness is not explicit to say in the least - I saw some people on here saying that Russia and China couldn't possibly edit Artie out without ruining the entire movie, but you know what? nowhere in the movie is it explicitly stated that Artie uses they/them pronouns and not he/him. nowhere in the movie is it explicitly stated that Artie is gay - maybe the abuse they face is because of their unconventional fashion choices, because of their uniqueness! isn't that what Artie says? isn't that why Estella was bullied at school - for looking different, not for being poor? you know that's not what they mean, and I know that's not what they mean, but it could easily be spun that way. just like the rest of the movie, it's full of plausible deniability and saying-something-but-not-quite. the Mouse's marketing guy strikes again

- and must every movie have a message? obviously not. but then why are you putting - and marketing - your nth "first openly gay character" into a movie set in the 1970s? with all this very gay punk/glam rock aesthetic? starring a character who is well-known to be a classist caricature, a social message?

- oh, but I had fun. I legitimately enjoyed the movie. Emma Stone and Emma Thompson carry the entire movie on their shoulders with their incredible performances. believe me when I say you're going to take Cruella seriously when she says those terribly hamfisted lines about being born brilliant, born bad, and a little bit mad. the music was incredible, although in the first half they put one banger after another and it 1) distracts from the scenes often 2) this doesn't make the scene any less hollow please stop.

- on the point of Dalmatian puppassassins - some seem to disagree, but I think that the movie was successful in setting up a campy, Lemony Snicket-y tone, so I wasn't that put off by that scene while watching. but after watching it, I thought - the fuck? you're killing the Dalmatian-skinner's mother with the actual dogs. why are you doing that?

- but she isn't a Dalmatian-skinner in this? yeah, I know, but you know the titular character is well-known for wanting to skin Dalmatian dogs, right? like when someone watches this movie, hopefully through toooootally legal channels, and they don't know what it's about except that it's about Cruella de Vil, it sets up some expectations. especially when you do it in the first five minutes of the movie, as pretty much the villain origin story to your titular character. why are you doing that? it wouldn't have this effect if the person whose mom gets killed by Dalmatian dogs wasn't Cruella fucking de Vil. what a dumbass choice

- I'd like to congratulate Artie for being the best "Disney's first openly gay character" so far

- I'd also like to state that I totally watched this movie through very legal channels

[hisfasttemper]

pietro maximoff in..."filmed before a live studio audience" -- wandavision {ep. 1}

| wandavision--starring pietro maximoff | part one | written by zen | @hisfasttemper | ♡

waking up in a suburban stylized home to the shattering sound of dishes before breakfast was perfectly adequate for the dandy brother/ brother-in-law role pietro maximoff had been cast in as of late.

cue a pun of 'flying saucers' and 'indestructible heads' accompanied by laugh tracks, shortly before the speedster made his timely queued entrance in the magic-enfuelled kitchen. sliding in unfasionably, the speedster gave a twirl as he hopped up onto the kitchen counter, surrounded by said flying saucers, finishing their quirky pubs with "--and your brother who's quick on his toes!"

"-feet, pietro, the saying is; quick on his feet." wanda corrected with a loose eye roll, grinning.

the suited synthezoid followed with, "quite correct wanda, see the phrase regarding one being quick on their feet originated from one's-"

"heyo vis! dictionary and his pal thesaurus called! they want their definitions back!" the brother-in-law quipped, swaying his legs on the counter.

wanda giggled towards their banter, levitaring a lollipop to her brother's shirt pocket as if rewarding a child having made some sort of achievement, which pietro had not, really. either way, the speedster took the sweet with an overjoyed gasp. "gee whizz! thanks, wanda!"

vision found himself having to leave behind the bantering siblings quite soon after to confide himself to an office working at a job with no purposeness whatsoever. not a matter to the twins however, as filling their days with distractions and 'obligations' came rather easily.

"now now, pietro, don't you have some groceries awaiting to be grabbed by your speedy little hands? " wanda whimmed, pinching her brothers black and white cheeks, "just because vis has no appetite doesn't mean we don't, does it? maybe you can introduce yourself to the buddying neighbourhood."

"you don't think the locals will be a little spooked at the sight of a silver blurr saying a fine 'how do you do' ?"

"not once they see that dashing face of yours. and I argue the vibranium husband and his telekinetic wife will leave them a little worse for wear than your speedy show."

the banter continued, each quip gaining laugh upon laugh from an unseen audience until pietro made his way out of the houses back door to shop the required foods his twin had listed for them. taking a glance around the overly cheerful neighbours with the blazefully unnatural su beaming down upon westview, pietro suddenly found himself in company before having the chance to arrive at the supermarket in a flash.

"golly !" came the quirky, astonished interruption of who could only be the maximoff's next door neighbour. pietro blinked, now fixated on a coal haired, 50's attired woman in her middle age. she gave pietro a scan over with eyes that hid more than he felt comfortable not knowing. "I tell you sweetcheeks, they don't make' em like you anymore, do they? living with my ralph has definitely proven that!"

his brows drew together in utter bafflement as they invisible audience laughed the woman on. he was oblivious as to who either she or this 'ralph' were, though he wasn't rude enough to say he didn't care. offering a fake smile and little bow at her compliment, the former sokovian- now american- replied with, "well your ralph must be blind as a bat to not see that he's living with someone remarkably stunning as you doll! "

she offered her hand, "the name's agnes, and what's your name hon, I'm betting something pretty." pietro dismissed the handshake, his urge to pull a stunt that would distract this 'agnes' and allow him to run to where he desired most to be was growing by the second. the neighbour continued, "I was just popping over to give an old fashioned welcome to your lovely little family when i saw you come out just now."

he REALLY desired to leave now. "well, I'll let my sister give you a grande introduction then, shall I?" the laugh track repeated unecessarily, while pietro's silver trail abandoned the scene.

hours of schenanagins and coupling woes occured between wanda and vision within the time it took for pietro to return home. only he entered with his sister's hands covering another petite woman's eyes in the style of their native country's greeting, all while in a dress not for a brothers eyes. to say that bafflement overwhelmed the speedster would be understating it by a long shot.

"ohhhh I'm going to cover my eyes, but not to say 'welcome to our home'!" the disturbed brother exclaimed, followed by vision erupting into a similar state as his own. as it unconventionally turned out, vision's boss and his spouse were visiting for dinner that could promote the synthezoid's future at his useless company.

chaos erupted in the kitchen as both maximoff twins were magicked into far more formal attire, with wanda in a oceanic dinner dress and pietro in a crimson suit and white bow tie. they were burdened with the task of cooking a full course meal within mere minuets while vision kept them suspiciously entertained in the meantime.

"how could this slip your mind, wanda, surely our nosy neighbour didn't distract you to the extent of FORGETTING A DINNER PARTY?! and WHAT were you wearing when I came in-"

she hushed him, flicking over the unprepared mashed potatoes in his direction, unexpectedly filling his mouth. he could only attempt to continue protesting, though wanda wanted a review of the food, not an interrogation. she perked up her brows, waiting. "is that mouthful enough of a distraction, or do I have to spill my real plans for myself and vision tonight?"

dinner came after floods of unpredicted silliness, and wanda's sudden lack of need in actually COOKING, rather just summoning a meal on the spot for the family and their guests. little did they know the true chaos would commence at the table...

the speedster chowed down on his food, letting visions boss mr.hart dabble on any nonsense or any 'couple's questions he inquired for his sister and brother-in-law. though as the laughs disintegrated, and tension suffocated the five of them,

"and who are you, what's your part in this?" questions now FIRED towards pietro...

and he too felt choked of knowledge or the ability to provide answers, just as wanda and vision seemed to be. what is his 'part'? what could that possibly mean...'part' as in role? like an acting role, in a movie, or show....? his theories were cut too soon as convienently, the aggressive questioner began to suffer his own form of choking attack, all three maximoff's dumbstruck where they sat as the boss's state grew creepily out of control.

"vision...help him," wanda ordered softly, pietro gripping her hand beneath the table until both of their knuckles faded white. vision resolved mr.harts state of struggle and for that evening, pietro couldnonly bear to stay for seconds longer before retiring to his unfamiliar bedroom, feeling TOO broodily faint to be shown on air. because, after all....

...he wasn't the main star of wandavision.

[gamora-borealis]

Reasons to watch CHiPs

The 1977-1983 TV show not the shitty movie

Okay so I'm too lazy to make one of those funny power points with comic sans, but here ya go.

CHiPs is this very '70s (a little '80s) show about California Highway Patrol officers, mainly focusing on Los Angeles motor officers and partners Frank "Ponch" Poncherello and Jon Baker. It's not perfect (the '70s were very problematic and talk about Police propoganda...) but here are some reasons to watch it.

Ponch and Jon are lovers. There is no heterosexual explanation for their relationship. Sure, Ponch still hooks up with a lot women and Jon dates girls occasionally, but why not? They wouldn't want anyone getting suspicious, so it's business as usual. Ponch is bi, and John is gay but just really likes hanging out with women (he drinks his respect women juice almost daily).

Jon is a cowboy from Wyoming (uhhh...Brokeback Mountain anyone?) and Ponch is Puetro Rican and speaks Spanish.

Their Sargent is played by Chris Pine's dad, Robert Pine, and I can't unsee it now everytime I see Chris Pine (Chris's mom is also on the show sometimes as the Sargent's wife and at one point has a baby named Christopher). The Sargent is always about to loose his damn mind over everyone's antics and it's great.

Season 3 and on, Michael Dorn (a.k.a Worf from Star Trek TNG) is one of the crusier cops, Jed Turner.

Season 2 has one of my favorite characters, Cindy Cahill, who is a staunch feminist and sometimes wears Princess Leia braids. She insists on using inclusive language and actively fights against the fact that she can't be a motor cop, even though she is a great motorcycle rider. She loves investigation and goes to Grad School at the same time too?? She is replaced by a model in Season 3, but Bonnie Clark isn't that bad after you get to know her.

According to a 90's CHiPs TV movie, her and Jon eventually date and get married, but I say it was only for convience because she is Aro/Ace and John is gay and they are good friends...

Sometimes Jon and Bonnie have the same haircut.

Caitlyn Jenner is on the show some in Season 5. Like her or hate her (for her politics), it's interesting. And I actually like her character.

Officer Artie Grossman, who is on the show from Season 1, is an amazing character. He loves food, is goofy, and just doesn't give a crap about other people's opinions. He conviently knows random facts about anything and everything, which always comes in handy.

Season 2 and on, Harlan Arliss is the station mechanic who is short, fiesty, a bit goofy, always wearing a labcoat, and also doesn't give a crap about what other people think of him. He starts out with a dog named Dave but the dog kind of disappears after a while. He and Artie eventually become good friends.

One of the originals, Officer Barry "Bear" Baricza is always wearing bellbottom uniform pants and has perfect hair.

They do so many things as CHP officers that CHP officers have no business doing, and should sometimes be left to local police or the FBI, but whatever...

Disco. Lots of Disco. As underscoring for car chases, and Ponch just loves Disco dancing and John likes watching him dance.

Listen to the theme song from Season 2 and on, you won't regret it.

Also some old '70s/'80s TV show jazz, in the earlier and later seasons especially.

Did I mention that Alan Silversti, the composer for the Avengers movies, does the music Season 2 and on?

EXPLOSIONS. Cars being launched over each other. Random chemicals exploding. Cars falling off cliffs and exploding. Car crashes that are so ridiculous, you just have to watch. With some slow motion, too.

Apparently Season 6 gets ridiculous. I'm on Season 5, but I've heard Season 6, in which John has left, involves plotlines like "a Robot tries to take over the station," "Evil glam rockers that look like KISS," and "Ponch becomes a Male Model."

Literally any season you can find the fads of the day. Tight short sorts, laser shows, roller disco, jet skying, skateboarding, three wheelers, exotic animals like Tigers, BMX bikes, street gangs that do martial arts, different kinds of car racing, going to Chippendales, horse riding, skydiving, nudist volleyball, and that is just off the top of my head...

The fashion and everything else is either retro aesthetic or ugly with no in between...John is always wearing turtlenecks and Ponch is always wearing low v-necks.

The "woah there is a women who is a *insert traditionally manly profession here,* dammnn" plots get old really fast and it's funny to see how everyone in the seventies thought they were soooo progressive.

They drive around Los Angeles all day and it's awesome.

I'll admit, the show is cheesy. I don't think I have ever laughed so hard at anything before, at how ridiculous it is. Perfect to watch when you are sick or really bored.

And there you go. It's on Amazon Prime and local network broadcast stations that show old shows.