#and i have like 5 years until im 30 but there's no way i can get my life in order until then compared to where everyone around me is

[tarantula-hawk-wasp]

hands and knees begging myself to be responsible tonight bc i have so much to do but i can feel in my heart irresponsible brain is going to win and im gonna end up drawing and making myself more behind and stressed but like i spent 8 hours researching and writing art history texts at my internship do i fucking want to research for my history class tonight even tho i should so i can let the professor know if my topic is viable? no i want to draw. and like even research aside i need to do dishes and laundry and pack

[andreeds]

i need to start journaling i think

[southislandwren]

i've successfully poisoned my boss's mind with instrumental music so i'm making a playlist of chill instrumentals so when im gone she can relax without having to find her own songs

[krashoutluv]

Arkham Knight Relationship HCS !! <3

( light nsfw, mostly SFW tho!! )

literally my wife ( i made this pic idc abt creds i just wanna talk abt it)

SFW !! <3

dying on this hill when i say basically any red hood would be soo yummy with a civilian or just someone who is extremely balanced.

im a red hood needs more fucking normalcy in his life TRUTHER.

relationship starts off slow, romantic and platonic, you need to be patient with him long enough for him to get over his mental dilemmas to feel ANY-TYPE of way towards you.

more then like 6 months lets be real yall

his way of bonding is quality time. ill die on this hill, especially at the start of the relationship. Nothing huge maybe just spending a couple extra minutes around you before leaving.

next is probably gift giving, esp with early relations, probably just gonna order you food or put fifty bucks on your countertop. you dont even notice until you realize you find a fifty around the last place he was standing. expect deliveries from R.H whenever he feels bad for something.

doesn't like being around for too long, feels like he's messing up something. ruining your day by keeping you up late (he was there for fifteen minutes), ruining your mood, (there was an awkward silence for like 30 seconds.)

not a overly conscious thought process though, he feels physically he isn’t supposed to be there. for whatever subconscious thing he picked up on, a awkward silence, or hes been there 15 minutes too long or something

well sometimes he'll mentally beat himself up.

he spirals a lot, needs someone to pull him out of that.

i think when he needs to be grounded, its not just comfort its making him feel alive in the present moment. he's never gonna truly forget about his traumas but maybe for just an hour or two; running around an arcade, walking around the city. just making him feel normal, yeah you BAGGED his ass quick.

he needs someone patient, really patient, someone whos very attentive and empathetic. (but not a complete push- over def needs someone to set him in line still)

i think if you move to quickly, he'll get super snappy and ghosting you,, ong put ur hands on him too early and he's left hooking you.

yeah you're waking up and the first thing your hearing is "Its been 12 years..."

second thing you hear is "you've been in a coma for.. 12 years."

third thing you're hearing is, " we think a bus hit you...”

obviously not touchy, even when he is settling down. hes just not sure how to .. or where to .. or why he wants too.

please his mental gymnastics get so crazy, just sit down with him and put on some silly ass movie so he stops

when he’s settled he cant pry himself off you though.

a lot of his expressions can definitely be told by his body language, naturally hes tense but theres certain habits he has when he's maybe thinking too much, or fustrated/irritated.

but he does all of the same for you, comfort, love, as much as he can he tries

Very attentive, has a mental list of 'shit you do when somethings wrong' or 'shit you like.'

doesn't consciously make any of these mental list, he just knows.

"didnt they say they liked this?" He pauses "shit ill just leave it at their window."

so he's like canonically smart as shit.

you have too much work from your boss or professor? hand it over its done in less then two hours.

literally buys you groceries and pays your bills (fucking lover boy.)

arkham knight finally figuring out how to ask for a hug (hes been dead silent for 5 minutes) (link) <— insta reel

HES A CHEM/HISTORY NERD FOR SURE

NSFW !! <3

probably- A FUCKING VIRGIN !! HES A NERD !! GETS AWKARD AS SHIT. WITH RAGING COMMITMENT AND TRUST ISSUES !! (will still die4you tho)

AGAIN, not in a "my soft squishe potato always been scared of sex" way but in a ‘oh my god hes so unsocialized’ way.

yall ever see a big ass dog just..standing.. literally him (hes dissociating)

genuinely dont believe that when he was arkham/training to be, he was sexually or romantically involved with anyone. the last thing that was on his mind was actually pursuing a sexual or romantic relationship.

along with his trauma, he just wasn’t comfortable with any of that.

ghosted so many people..

couldn’t flirt for more then five minutes, just stopped feeling it or got uncomfortable .

I AM ANTI ARKHAM KNIGHT BEING A SEX GOD

not that he’s horribly awkward, but he’s noticeably a bit more quiet for first times.

ofc this man has watched porn n’ shit but hes smart enough to know thats not what its really like.

he’ll still figure it, what makes you tic, what you love, what makes you most comfortable.

kinda shitty at dirty talk, just makes him buffer.

he gets better at it tho, too damn good

gets so snarky and confident about it too uuhgrr

late relationships hes smirking and chatting your ears off cause you know hes gettin you turnt.

he has a love-hate relationship with his scars. 95% they remind him of his past, but 5% hes alright with them because they’ve shown what hes been through.

deep, deep, deep, deep, deep down, he knows hes fine as fuck. TRUST YALL.

again, super observant and attentive. really pays attention to what you enjoy.

I genuinely don’t believe hes into super hardcore/painful kinks or anything.

Sex for him is definitely a way of showing his trust and intimacy with someone!! Let him show you how much he loves you and how much he wants to make you feel good! Do the same to him !!

mmm tell him how good hes doing and hes a absolute mess!!

praise him! PRAISE HIM *im yelling from the hospital bed im strapped down on*

wouldn’t let you ride for awhile, but once he’s comfortable with it ,, he’s actually obsessed.

cant see him bottoming , just wouldn’t be comfortable with it

my brain is getting messy so im stopping here! feedback and comments would be cool if you wanna drop some!

[futureman]

hi ur writing is so so good, makes me go insane ur amazing

okay so could you do a normally dom!joel but one day he has the day off and reader doesn’t, so all he does ALL day is think about her. When she gets home he’s worked himself into a frenzy, desperate asf. So instead of his usual dominant self he’s desperate!joel whining and whimpering for her to touch him, make him cum, moaning in her ear and grinding against her.. all of that fun stuff 🤭

thank u for ur time, pls excuse the depravity 🙏🏾

hi nonie! loooved this request so much. i got a similar one from @luvrxbunny, so i combined them a bit and made it a lil longer. hope you both enjoy!

omg ur so amazing ily pls pls pls pls pls pls pls can i have dom!joel with a praise kink 🙏🏾 he doesn’t even really realize it but reader does and she’s just pummels him with praise while he’s fucking her and he does feral, moaning and grunting in her ear i’m sorry im so feral

way too damn needy

pairing: joel miller x f!reader

warnings: 18+ MDNI, pre-outbreak, language, smut, dom-turned-sub!joel, gentle-dom!reader, praise kink, masturbation, phone sex, blowjobs, face fucking, lil fluff

word count: 2.8k

What a way to spend his only day off in weeks. The weather’s perfect for playing his guitar on the porch, and he thought he’d even squeeze in a swim before getting started on building that new bedside table for Sarah. He had plans. 

But instead, Joel’s stalking around his living room like a caged animal in an endless loop of waiting, waiting, waiting.

It’s like he’s been transported back to his teenage years when every guy in a relationship followed his girl around like a puppy, always at her beck and call. Wondering what she was doing, if she was thinking about him. Except he wasn’t even that guy in high school. Not then, and definitely not now.

There’s really no logical reason for him to be this wound up, totally unable to do a single thing on his to-do list just because you’re not home. Leave it to your company to be the only one in the entire country that doesn’t give their employees Labor Day off.

That’s probably a gross exaggeration, but what does he care? He’s been tragically affected by this clearly personal transgression, and has to wait…two more hours? Seriously? You normally leave around 5:30, which means you’re home by six, and he’s not sure he can wait that long.

The sad fact of it all is that he’s already wasted almost the entire day not enjoying all of those relaxing activities he’d planned for. What’s even sadder is that he’s been half-hard for most of it, intermittently pausing his ridiculous pacing to grind the heel of his hand into his crotch for relief. Petulantly waiting for you to get home and take care of it for him.

Well, another hour’s gone by, it’s 5 pm, and he’s officially past his limit. At this point, he's probably better off handling it himself, at least until you're finally back. Then, you’re all his. 

He’ll fill you up with every last bit of pent-up frustration he’s felt since you left the house this morning, making you regret not just calling in sick. You might have to tomorrow after he’s done with you.

Joel drops onto the couch, laying to face the door so he’s the first thing you see when you walk in. Pulling his boxers and jeans down just enough to get his cock out, he wraps his hand around himself, immediately hissing out a breath through his teeth. Shit, he’s been hard for hours and just that slight touch already has him leaking precum all over his fingers. 

For a moment, he worries that maybe he’s a little too worked up, that he’ll cum way before he gets the chance to make you sorry for making him feel so desperate. So needy. And that makes him mad.

It should be your fingers covered in precum, your plush lips sucking him down to the hilt, and your pretty pussy aching with the need to have him inside you. Funny how you’re always so good for him, except today when he needs you the most.

His hand starts to move languidly before he can stop it, the slide wet and tight, just like he knows you’ll be. But it’s not you, and that makes him even angrier. If he can’t feel you the way he needs to, then maybe your voice will hold him over until he can. 

The phone only rings twice before you pick up.

“Baby, I’m busy right now. What’s up?” you answer, slightly out of breath. 

It’s cruel, but Joel honestly doesn’t give a shit if you’re busy. Not when his mind is this clouded with thoughts of you on your back, breathing much heavier than you are right now. But he manages to keep that to himself.

“You comin’ home soon?” he asks gruffly, still tugging on his cock, head thrown back on the armrest of the couch.

“Uhh, probably leaving in about…a half hour?” Your voice lilts like you had to double-check the time. “Everything okay?”

“Any chance you can leave now?” he tries again, side-stepping your question. 

The desperation in his voice is obvious, and it makes him feel even more pathetic. He wonders if you can hear it. Part of him hopes you can.

“Why, did something happen? Is Sarah okay?” you ask, clearly concerned. 

“S’fine, everythin’s fine. Just miss ya, s’all," he lies shakily.

Of course, he misses you, but nothing here is fine. His angrily weeping cock is a testament to that. He's all but fucking into his own fist now, hips bucking off the couch as he pants into the phone.

“Joel, what—are you touching yourself? Jesus,” you mumble, and he can hear your heels clacking against the floor like you’re walking somewhere. Quickly.

“Been thinkin’ about ya all damn day. Dunno why you went into work on a fuckin’ holiday,” he grunts. “Should’a been here with me, on your back, beggin’ for my cock like a good girl.” 

You inhale sharply and, though muted through the phone, he hears it loud and clear, dribbling more precum down his shaft. Unfamiliar voices start to filter through the speaker, so he’s guessing you can’t say much. 

And that’s okay. He has no problem filling the silence. Joel loves talking to you while he’s getting off.

“Had me feelin’ needy today, babygirl. Y’know I don’t like that,” he says dangerously. Your heels hit the ground faster, and he subconsciously matches his strokes to your pace. “Thought I was losin’ my mind for a while there. Was just about ready to let you do whatever you wanted to me when you got home, s’long as I got to fuck that tight pussy of yours.”

A door slams in the background, then all he can hear is you panting heavily in his ear. But when you finally speak again, your voice sounds different. Less like his good girl, and more like someone who knows they hold all the power.

“Oh, poor baby,” you coo, catching him off guard. “Did I leave you alone too long?”

He can tell you’re mocking him but, for some reason, his resolve starts to slip away more and more with every violent throb of his cock. Maybe it’s desperation. Or maybe he just likes it. 

“I’m so sorry,” you continue, murmuring sweetly in his ear. “I can make it all better…but only if you wait a little longer. Can you do that for me? Be my good boy.”

He bites back a groan, gripping the base of his cock hard to keep from cumming then and there. That's...new. And sexy as hell. He's still frenzied to the point of no return, but you also might've rewired something in his brain because he suddenly realizes he does want to be your good boy. Badly.

Fuck, he hopes you get home soon.

That last half hour of work was torture. You spent the entirety of it, and the car ride afterward, marinating in your soaked underwear, anticipating everything Joel has in store for you when you get home.

You're not sure what came over you on the phone, but it sounded like he enjoyed it. A lot. It’s a dynamic you’d never thought to try in your relationship, not with Joel’s domineering personality. The fact that he went along with it at all must mean he’s going through it, and that’s something you’re a little too excited to see.

The house is quiet when you walk in, save for the sound of your keys dropping into the bowl by the door. You turn to hang your bag on a nearby coat rack, and that's when you see him.

Joel, still lying on the couch exactly where you assume you left him after your call, with his hand squeezed tight around the base of his cock. He looks like a goddamn mess—sweating, hard as a rock, and leaking all over himself. His eyes are a little wild, more so than you've ever seen them. Christ, poor baby. You didn’t think your absence would affect him this much.

“Aw, sweet boy. Is all this for me?" you smile softly. He sucks in a breath, visibly twitching in his hand, and your smile widens. “Sit up, I can’t play with you like this.”

He complies immediately, and it sends a shiver up your spine. You love how well he’s listening, even though he almost looks like he's in pain after being in this state for so long. For that, you think he deserves a reward.

So, you give him one—the one he’s been waiting for all day. You undress for him, maintaining eye contact as you slip off your stuffy business attire, finally ridding yourself of your oppressively sticky underwear. 

Dropping to your knees between his legs, you gaze up at him affectionately, mouth inches away from his drooling cock. 

"Tell me what you want," you lean in, pressing your lips against the smooth, velvety skin. "Still wanna fuck me? Get me on my back, begging for it?"

Your tongue darts out to taste him, and you moan, licking a wide stripe up to wrap your lips around the tip. He's salty and heady, and so fucking delicious, but he still hasn't answered you. Instead, his fingers thread through your hair, guiding you down halfway and back up, shallowly fucking your mouth.

"I—fuck, please...," he's struggling with his words, whimpering around each syllable. "—baby, I waited...been good, did what ya said."

You nod your head understandingly, or at least try to as you continue to let him thrust into the inside of your cheek. His eyes are hyperfocused on the way your skin bulges around him, each stroke sending a shockwave of pleasure straight down his tightening balls.

"Christ, you feel good. Worth waitin' for, so fuckin' worth it," he rasps, his fingers tensing in your hair. "Need ya to—," he repositions your head so he can thrust further, deeper until he's nudging the back of your throat, "—ngh, make me cum. Suck harder, baby, please."

Soft, hiccuped moans escape his parted lips, increasing in volume when you start to drool around him, down your chin and onto your breasts. You can tell he's about to burst, feeling his skin growing taut against your tongue.

"M'gonna—haah, gonna...," desperation clouds his eyes, still dictating his every thought and move. 

But you don't let him because that's not what he said he wanted earlier. He's allowed to buck into you a few more times before you pull off with a loud pop, and the needy, frustrated whine he lets out almost makes you reconsider. Almost.

"I'm gonna make you cum, I promise, but not with my mouth," you tell him, voice tinged with disappointment, wrecked from the force of taking him like that. "You were doing so well for me. Come down here, keep being my good boy and I'll make you feel good."

Plopping down on the carpet, you spread your legs so he can see how wet you are for him. It's only gotten worse since earlier, slick coating your thighs, shiny and all the more inviting. You lay back, trailing your fingers up your belly to your breast to tweak a nipple, sighing as you reach out to him with your other hand.

Again, he obeys, his desire to empty down your throat all but forgotten. His shirt is quickly discarded, followed by everything below his waist, and then he's shifting onto the floor between your legs.

"There's my sweet boy," you coo, running your hands up his chest through a smattering of coarse, dark curls, and it rumbles under your palms as he mewls sweetly at your praise. 

He leans over you, hovering like he's waiting for permission to touch you, but he doesn't need it. The only thing you're trying to do is guide him, not control him. You want to make sure he gets exactly what he was so patient for. 

"Wanna feel you, babygirl. Let me—," he amends what he was about to demand, "...can I touch you?"

You bite your lip nodding as you smile up at him, and he wastes no time dropping down to bury his face into the crook of your neck, sucking wetly as he presses his body flush against yours. You writhe underneath him, just as pent up as he is by now, the realization triggered by how incredible his naked body feels on top of you. 

"Fuckin' hell, you're soft," he moans into your ear, propped up on his forearms. His cock brushes against your inner thigh, and his moan turns guttural, raw like it clawed its way out. "Mmph, I can't—"

He lurches up to crash his lips into yours, kissing you sloppily, hungrily, as his hips finally dip to drag against where you're soaked and aching. But not for nearly as long as he's been, and right now, he comes first. You need him to know he can have you. That he doesn't have to wait anymore.

"Don't...don't fight it. You've been perfect, you deserve it," you gasp out, and his hips jerk, your words forcing a low keen past his lips and into your mouth. "Take, baby. Take what you need."

Joel doesn't take, he seizes, laying claim to every part of you. Like he's afraid he won't get another chance if he doesn't take full advantage of what you've given him right now.

He faintly reminds you of a puppy lacking object permanence, believing the next time you leave, he'll be stuck waiting for you to come back to him forever. God, you're not even sure how you fucked him up so badly, but it's clear by the way he's handling you that he won't let you go again.

He moves quickly. One moment, he's leaning back on his heels, digging his fingers into your waist to yank you up onto his thighs, and the next, he's fucking into you as hard and fast as a bullet train. His cock somehow feels thicker, heavier than it ever has when he breaches your cunt, and the stretch has you clawing at the carpet beneath you.

"Missed you all day, wanted you all goddamn day," he growls, plowing into you forcefully enough to make your brain go fuzzy. "Fuck, babygirl, you got no idea what I've been through."

Christ, that feels—it feels...Christ. He's hitting something. You have no idea what, but it feels ungodly, like if he keeps going just like that, you'll cum without his fingers on you at all. It's happened before with Joel, but it's rare—and it's only when he's deep, lighting up all of your nerve endings at once. Fuck, he's being so good today.

"S'okay, you're okay," you gasp, clenching down around him when he suddenly pounds into the spot dead on. "I...I'm here now. Just keep going there, right there."

He nods frantically, gritting his teeth as you continue to tighten around him.

"Good boy," you mumble deliriously, your back arching completely off the ground as your orgasm rocks you. 

"Shit, you—'m not touchin'...fuck, baby, you cummin'?" 

It hits him all at once, what's happening, and then he's cumming, too. He's loud through his entire release, alternating between drawn-out moans and hiccuped whimpers as he fills you up with a whole day's worth of pent-up frustration.

Thrusting until your aftershocks have subsided, he grinds in deep one last time, letting you milk him completely dry before he pulls out. You're boneless underneath him, your eyes glazed over while his are finally clear for the first time in almost ten hours. 

He lowers your body onto the floor and crawls over next you, pulling your body against his. His embrace is warm and pleasant, and enough to pull you out of your post-orgasm stupor. Wriggling in his arms to get more comfortable, you tilt your head back from where he'd tucked it under his chin to grin up at him.

"So you missed me, huh?"

He rolls his eyes, back to his usual, not-totally-depraved self, but you already know the answer. He just spent the last hour showing you exactly how much.

"Thought I already made that clear," he confirms gruffly, pressing a tender kiss to your forehead. "Next time, could ya maybe just use your vacation days? Please?"

"Sure," you laugh, nuzzling into his neck. "I'll save them up just for you." 

You reach up to scratch your fingernails across his beard, your other hand petting the soft curls at the nape of his neck. A soft noise rumbles low in his chest, but he tries to play it off by clearing his throat. Playfully raising an eyebrow, you continue your ministrations and it happens again.

"Baby, quit, 'm not a dog," he deadpans, even as he leans into your touch, his body betraying him.

"You sure about that? Because you sure were needy like one today."

[roosterm3attrash]

101 ways to kill Barney Calhoun

I ended up making this list by going through multiple servers and people so here cuz I found it in my phone notes

Anyway the brilliant minds of the half-life fandom

1.) Waited pressure plate with tnt under it

2.) im going to leave mines under his mattress

3.) i’m setting a rake on his floor so he steps on it and whacks his face

4.) I'm giving him a bomb disguised as a cigar

5.) barney death 3: he ate what elvis presley ate….

6.) I would kill Barney Calhoun by slapping him so hard on the ass that it gives him cardiac arrest

7.) I drop him onto a pit of venomous snakes

8.) Im going to give Barney a beer but instead of beer it will be filled with deadly neurotoxin

9.) “now gordon, ive been keepin an eye out on this combine hideout for a while. they seem to walk in a certain pattern when crossing over to the entrance, which makes me think theyve buried mines all over the place. now, ive memorized the pattern, so im just gonna sneak on over, and you follow my lead, alright? dont worry, i know exactly where all the mines are.” and then he explodes

10.) that one episode of sponge bob where he eats the exploding pie and explodes

11.) set up tripwire then he falls into a tiger pit

12.) I type kill npc_barney into console

13.) slap the boobies off his chest so hard them fly around the world and hit the side of his head like water balloons

14.) i could marry him and slowly feed him mercury over a span for 3 years until he dies of mercury poisoning

15.) He tries to become a wwe wrestler but gets killed in a freak accident mid match

16.) I would kill him by making him a pizza but it’s covered in big chunks of lead but it’s hidden in the sauce and it’s a Chicago style pizza

17.) bring him to a highway and kiss him so hard he gets knocked onto the road and gets ran over

18.) Peeling him apart by the dna strand and eating it like spaghetti

19.) barney gets trampled by a stampede of horses

20.) giving him under the counter off brand viagra

21.) put him in a washing machine and turn it on

22.) shark attack

23.) pit of sharks

24.) barney gets criticized so badly he dies

25.) barney sits in an uncomfortable chair for too long

26.) He gets his arm caught in a bear trap w a beer used as a lure

27.) HE BECOMES THE CAT THAT TRAUMATIZED HIM. HE….YKNOW…..

28.) he gets stuck in a swimming pool like hes in the sims and dies from getting exhausted and drowning

29.) barney roasting marshmallows but his stick ignites into flames and he burns to death

30.) ATTACH SO MANY BALLOONS TO BARNEY HE FLOATS AWAY INTO THE SKY NEVER TO BE SEEN AGAIN

31.) barney gets rejected by gordon and he gets so sad his body shuts down

32.) I kiss him so tenderly on the lips that he melts into a puddle and dies

33.) i throw him in to a volcano so that he melt into a puddle and dies

34.) "I’ll turn him into a flea, a harmless, little flea, and then I’ll put that flea in a box, and then I’ll put that box inside of another box, and then I’ll mail that box to myself, and when it arrives…I’ll smash it with a hammer!"

35.) stick a bottle of beer into his throat, the whole bottle

36.) give Barney Calhoun a beer can full of poison

37.) hang a piano over the toilet and wait

38.) i think barney should have his spine ripped out through his mouth

39.) he goes to a bar and tries flirting with the bartender and the bartender takes out a shotgun and kills him on the spot

40.) punch him so hard in the penis that he shatters like a brittle glass

41.) bite him in half

42.) I'm grinding him in a giant shredder

43.) bro took a bath in hot mac 'n cheese

44.) i put him ina giant caldron full of water and i begin boiling him down to gelatin and broth

45.) barney accompanies the crew to the borealis and he steps over thin ice and gets dunked into the below zero water and freezes to death

46.) barney calhoun gets carried away by a tornado

47.) took barney on a vacation to Hawai’i and pushed him into a volcano

48.) He dies and he's never mentioned again and nobody cares

49.) died of tummy ache

50.) Stepped on by a strider

51.) shrinked until he disappeared completely

52.) blasted into the sun

53.) Stab him with 300 pencils made with real lead

54.) slip and falls and dies

55.) put him into a Minecraft furnace

56.) Barney ignores the wet floor sign and slips and cracks his head

57.) while swimming in the swimming pool he swims to fast and smashes his face against the pool's wall

58.) he gets a concussion and drowns

59.) i want to put him through a lunchmeat slicer

60.) He falls off a dumb huge cliff

61.) he lives his life to the fullest and at his deathbed at age 93, June 29th, 6:12 am he passes away

62.) he eats a burgie with too much grease and gets a heart attack

63.) testicular cancer

64.) He should get sucked into a fan while trying to fix it at Black Mesa and literally no one comes looking for him

65.) The Pita Bread Room

66.) slipped on a Banana peel

67.) ran over by a crap ton of shopping carts rolling down the hill

68.) barney overheats in a fursuit

69.) he has sex so bad that he dies

70.) Barney dies because i fucking kill him with a shovel 🖕

71.) barney eats the gas station sushi

72.) barney faints via twirling around and holding his hand in front of his forehead, and then slowly lying down with a flower in his hands to indicate death

73.) When they turn off the suppression fields he just blows up

74.) barney gets crushed by a giant boulder thats all i got son

75.) barney goes to the beach that makes you old

76.) His head spontaneously combusts and pops like corn

77.) erectile dysfunction

78.) we should also have him get carbon monoxide poisoning

79.) barney gets gaussian blurred into nothingness

80.) he eats 20 year old expired mcdonalds burger and contracts the worst case of food poisoning youve ever seen

81.) Have we done tying him to a train track like a damsel

82.) he dies in a glue trap

83.) barney develops lactose intolerance over the years of combine occupation and he drink milk and then dies from shitting hinself to death

84.) he should chocke on his favourite food

85.) barney gets lead poisoning from a 1990s garfield glass mug

86.) he chokes on plastic

87.) barney gets thrown throw a glass window from a 15 story building

88.) gordon gives barney a wedgie so bad that he splits in half and dies

89.) gordon and barney divorce and barney dies from heartbreak

90.) alyx and gordon have enough of barney’s snoring so they smother him in his sleep with a pillow

91.) he trips while walking with gordon and impales himself on gordons crowbar face

92.) if he were the size of an ant he'd be ok instead he blows up like a watermelon and his remains are fed to lamarr by a very delighted kleiner. he fucking hated barney

93.) dog roughhouses with barney and accidentally obliterates his spinal cord

94.) barney gets poisoned to death by his own chumtoad

95.) coats him in eggs and flour and fries him

96.) snatched by a hawk and eten alive

97.) barney gets to participate in a danganronpa killing game and gets executed

98.) barney opens the love-letter-for-you.txt.vbs file and it kills him

99.) elaborate rube goldberg machine to drop an anvil on barney

100.) barney dies in an Iron Maiden

101.) we should put barney under those old timey stone tablets meant to squish and torture people and make them talk

[partyhorn]

Have u ever posted your comic or animation workflow anywhere? Im super curious on how you tackle the process, especially not using a drawing tablet. I know you have a very simple (and adorable) style so that probably helps in terms of workflow -- Im just curious about the steps you take.

Thank you! With both comics and animation my key thing is to not spend too much time on any particular thing, just draw loose and fast. Honestly the only downside to drawing with a mouse is that I can tell my arm has extremely specific muscle memory regarding it- if my mouse breaks and I get a new one I have to spend a good month or so just letting my hand get used to it again lol. Same with if my setup gets readjusted too much- right now my setup is my mouse on one of those padded mousepads, on top of 2 books, with my elbow resting on my 3DS case (I'll get an actual pillow or something for it eventually lol). But luckily thanks to this I suffer very minimal wrist pain 👍

(...Okay I started to go really in depth in my process here, so sorry if this is way more than what you were asking. Putting it under a readmore just to save space lol)

With MFM in particular, I start by writing out the entire script for the next story arc, which really is just all of the dialogue and vague notes about any important actions. Then I do the paneling with very loose stick-figure like sketches of where the characters are and what they're doing. I prefer having very little planning when it comes to character poses and panel shapes, coming up with those on the fly makes things much more exciting and faster to make. But it's the opposite with dialogue... it needs to be 100% FINAL before I draw a single line lol.

That's part of my script for my most recent chapter, as well as what my extremely loose goofy thumbnail sketching is like. I write the script as one big thing and don't separate it into pages until I actually start drawing- then I go and color change it just to keep track of what dialogue goes on each page

After that, I go back and do the ACTUAL sketch, as well as the lettering (I don't believe this is how it's done professionally. I used to do lettering as the very last step in the process... but then found it hard to cram speech bubbles in the right places lmao.) After that is lineart, coloring, background flat colors, then shading/rendering for all of it. I do each step in batches, as in I sketch out ALL pages of a chapter before moving to lineart, I line ALL pages before starting coloring, etc. I find it way easier to be productive when it's broken up like that, though when I first started the comic I used to draw each page to completion before starting the next (but also, the comic's style was DRASTICALLY simpler back then haha)

(Unfortunately I merged some of the shading to the background flat colors so it's not entirely accurate... oops) FireAlpaca has a sand texture feature that I only found out about last year- adding that to the backgrounds makes them look 10x better with WAY less effort.

With animation, it depends on the project. For simple 5-10 second animation I make for fun, there's very little planning lol. I skip some steps in the process- I'll sketch out the keyframes (and maybe any difficult inbetweens if necessary), line those, then go straight into making linework inbetweens. I'm not a cleanup artist and have no experience in that, so I always find trying to line my rough animation makes everything jittery and wobbly. If I do it with a clean line from the start then I can avoid that and save a lot of time 👍

For my bigger projects (such as the Parvey cartoon and the MFM Kickstarter trailer), I do the whole animatic with final audio first and foremost, with the animatic being almost like the keyframes. I split them up into individual shots, .mp4 files anywhere between 1-30 seconds usually, and animate those one at a time. I'm a huge fan of free to use programs and try to use them as much as I possibly can, here's a list of the ones I use:

FireAlpaca- for the actual drawing part itself (storyboarding/animating/etc). FireAlpaca has a feature that lets you export every frame as it's own drawing, as well as an onion skin mode

Windows Movie Maker- for compiling all of those frames into video format, creating individual shots. If you upload all of your frames and set them to around 0.08 seconds, it equals about 12fps (I usually animate at 0.10 seconds/10fps, its a bit slower but looks nice)

Onlinesequencer.net- for making music. It's the place I've made all of my songs on, like the timeloop song, hyperworkaholic, and the background music for the MFM Kickstarter trailer.

Audacity- for editing audio/music. Also great for recording things directly from your desktop

DaVinci Resolve- for editing and putting together all of the shots into one big video. Can get kind of intensive on the computer during rendering, so watch out.

YouCut (app)- also for editing and compiling shots, I used this one a lot a couple years back but I'm not sure how well it holds up. Doesn't need much phone storage to download but needs a lot to render videos.

MS Paint (yes really)- for typing up text. FireAlpaca has a text option but I don't like it as much as Paint's.

...The only thing I genuinely can't do alone is voice acting. Luckily there's a big voice acting community on Twitter and they're all amazing to work with!

This got... way more in depth than I planned for it to be, so sorry if this is way more than what you were asking lol. But that's my general process when it comes to my art 👍

[thissortofsorcery]

6. Coffee in bed

Babe, I wasn't put on earth to be brief, so. Hope you like this! Once again we hop on the Steve loving on Billy train. I had a lot of fun writing it.

I appreciate your prompt so much &lt;3

-----

i want coffee >:((((

Is what Billy sends in the group chat in the middle of the afternoon on a Wednesday, fighting to keep his eyes open. He can't just give in and have a nap. He has a paper due next week, and Billy's never been the kind of person that believes in leaving things for the last minute, so he's got his laptop and his textbook and his notes from class spread around him on the bed, and he's going to get the bulk of this hell assignment done today. If he doesn't fall asleep.

Billy would get up and get coffee for himself, except he's very comfortable and he just found a nice position for his back. He doesn't want to get up.

Heather: i remember seeing a coffee maker in your kitchen

Heather: you could use that

Billy: don't wanna get up tho

Chrissy: are you about to fall asleep?

Billy: might be

Chrissy: I can call you in 30 mins if you want to nap

Billy: no im gonna fight it

Tommy: just take the nap dude

Heather: the coffee is 10 feet and 5 minutes away

Steve: did you eat?

Confusion pulls Billy's eyebrows together, and he waits for another text to come elaborating the question, but nothing does. In fact, the whole group chat stalls.

Billy: not yet

And Steve sends him a thumbs up. 

Billy rolls his eyes, and tosses his phone to the side. Steve makes no damn sense, sometimes. He's got this whole pretty boy, midwestern nice guy going for him, which Billy has to admit is charming as hell, and a line of chicks wanting to date him, but he never wants to date any of them. Billy is relieved, a little bit. If he had to watch Steve fall in love with someone while sharing an apartment with him, he'd lose his fucking mind, on account of the huge crush Billy's had on him since freshman year.

He really should get back to his paper, or he's gonna be stuck working on it until late.

Billy rubs his eyes blearily and turns his music a little louder, puts Kill 'Em All on loop because it never fails to fire him up. The guitar notes fill the room and make his eyelids feel a little lighter, make his limbs feel a little looser, and Billy jiggles his feet to the beat of the song while he takes notes on the library book he's reading. He can already imagine some of the paragraphs he wants to write in his head.

About an hour later, Billy's managed to outline some of his topics, but his eyelids are getting heavy again. His body feels like it's sinking into the bed, and all he wants is to burrow into his hoodie and curl up into a ball. Billy yawns and covers his face, letting out a long groan. Maybe he can close his eyes for five minutes. 

The sound of keys jingling on the front door of the apartment jerk him awake, and he opens his eyes like he's been hit over the head.

"Billy?" Steve's voice sounds from the living room. There's some shuffling, then Steve's head pops in his open door. "Hey."

Billy squints at Steve, takes in his swept up hair, the jacket he hasn't bothered to take off, and the soft smile spreading on his face as he looks at Billy, eyes shining, looking awfully fond in a way that makes Billy's chest hurt.

"You fell asleep," He says, and his voice is fond too.

"I didn't."

"You so did," Steve laughs, and comes into the room. He's wearing socks, because he hates shoes indoors, and he pushes something at Billy when he reaches his side. "Brought you coffee. And uh, a sandwich, cause you said you didn't eat."

Billy blinks at the to-go cup in Steve's right hand, trying to figure out if he's still dreaming, still caught in the haze of his subconscious fed by wishful thinking, because he can't imagine why Steve would stop to buy him coffee on his way back home. 

"You what?" It comes out sharp, meaner than he'd meant to, and Billy immediately cringes.

But Steve just laughs.

"Jesus, you're grumpy," He shakes the coffee cup at Billy. "You have that paper due monday, and you're gonna be bitchy all day tomorrow if you don't do anything for it today. Drink your coffee."

Billy's mouth falls open, and he can only listen to Steve's words repeating themselves in his mind while he traces Steve's features with his eyes – the playful angle of his eyebrows, the endless brown in his eyes, fixed on Billy, how his mouth curves softly upwards, deliciously red. He's wide awake, now.

Billy feels himself being pulled upwards by invisible strings, unable to look away from Steve. He gets his knees under himself and straightens up, hands stretched out, finding the perfect angle of Steve's jaw, thumbs nestled in the hollow of his cheeks. Steve's smile has given way to shock, and Billy would have pulled back if Steve hadn't swayed into him, eyelids fluttering, breath stuttering, eyes jumping between Billy's eyes and his mouth.

When their lips meet it's sweet, it's tender, it's more than Billy thought it could be, because Steve sighs into the kiss like he's relieved, sucks on Billy's lips like he's hungry, molds his body to Billy's like he never wants to feel cold air between their bodies again. Billy welcomes Steve's tongue like a cool drink, like fresh water, begs for more of it when it retreats. Billy can't get enough of it, can't get enough of him, not now that he has it.

Steve presses more sweet kisses on his lips once the first one breaks, like he can't bear for it to end, and Billy revels in it, on the soft, fluttering feeling they ignite in his chest. Steve's kissing him like he's something to be savored, a delight to be enjoyed carefully and slowly and patiently. It makes Billy's breath catch in his chest, and he wants to hold on to Steve, to clutch him tightly.

It ends with Steve's nose stroking along Billy's cheek, sending shivers down Billy's spine. He's clinging to Steve with his hands in Steve's hair, taking deep breaths under the guise of slowing his breathing down, but really he's taking in Steve's smell, the warm, woodsy tones of him under the apple scent of his shampoo. 

"Hey," Steve murmurs against his skin. Billy's grip on him tightens, and Steve kisses his cheek, maybe to assure him that what's coming isn't bad. "Your coffee's going cold."

It startles a laugh out of Billy. He'd forgotten about the coffee.

He pulls back just enough so Steve can disentangle his arm and hand Billy the cup, and when he takes a sip, it's on the hotter end of warm. 

"It's good," Billy says, and the smile Steve gives him is wide and toothy.

"I, uh…" Steve fumbles to put the sandwich bag he was still holding on Billy's bedside table, then settles a hand on Billy's waist. It's the first touch of Steve's hands on him, and it burns deliciously. "I should– let you get back to your paper."

Steve ducks his head, hair flopping into his eyes, suddenly looking shy. Like he's not sure Billy wants him to stick around.

Billy sets the coffee cup aside. He winds his arms around Steve's waist, draws him close, so he has no doubt of where Billy wants him to go.

"Screw the paper," Billy says, and Steve stares at him with his mouth open. "Come here."

And Steve kisses him.

-----

send me a number from this list of soft prompts

[purecantarella]

✨purecantarella's kinktober✨

—was this planned? no, nothing i ever do is planned HAHAHAH but this is a rough concept of what i have planned this month. i will do my best to follow it but they won't be as in depth as the smut i usually write but i will try!! this will be my first time participating in kinktober actually and i am starting late :"")

day 2 : Praise Kink w/ Im Nayeon — your girlfriend and you are having a nice night in after their promotions for their song when you figure out one of her secrets.

day 3 : Mutual Masterbation w/ Shin Yuna — college!yuna doesn't want to admit it, but she needs help with certain things and as irritating as she finds you, you have all the answers.

day 4 : Restraints w/ Kim Jennie — your girlfriend has a bad habit of leaving all sorts of marks on you before a big comeback and you've found a solution to you problem.

day 5 : Breath Play w/ Park Jihyo — jihyo's vocals are amazing on their own, but you can't help but nitpick at certain things about it...like her breathing techniques.

day 6 : Wet Dreams w/ Miyou Mina — mina's been repressing just how attractive she thinks her member's girlfriend is. just might manifest it's way in more ways than one

day 7 : Threesome w/ Moon Byuli and Ahn Hwasa — a horny hwasa and competitive moonbyul raise you a wager.

day 8 : Phone Sex w/ Hwang Yeji — a secret relationship in the midst of heavy and demanding promotions can really make someone miss their incredibly attractive and sexy girlfriend.

day 9 : Break — i needed some time to recuperate yall

day 10 : Food Play w/ Hirai Momo — an indoor picnic for your 3rd year anniversary sounded lovely, strawberries, cream, chocolate, and most of all, Momo

day 11 : Corruption w/ Kim Dahyun —Dahyun never learned too much about sex nor did she want to...not until she met you of course.

day 12 : Marking w/ Minatozaki Sana — you loathed how much people looked at your girlfriend, but you'd never known what Minatozaki Sana looked like jealous.

day 13 : First Time || Love Making w/ Choi Lia — summer romance with Lia turns serious and you want to make sure that she remembers you forever with a romantic night under the stars.

day 14 : Office Quickies w/ Kim Jisoo — her employees are working her last nerve, then you show up giving her the chance to blow off some steam.

day 15 : Breeding w/ Park Rosé — rosé often talked about having kids with you, but you just supposed she didn't know what the idea did to you.

day 16 : Ab Riding w/ Kang Seulgi — seulgi preparing and performing for her latest comeback with the girls has left you in a rut, but backstage with those chiseled abs exposed? you're only human.

day 17 : Public Sex w/ Son Seungwan — wendy was always the type to lose control when you two were intimate, so you want to see just how far she can control herself

Day 18 : Break pt 2 — i'm prolly gonna be drained from this and midterms, so im gonna need this vv badly (prolly will post shit today anyway tho so this is kinda a wildcard)

Day 19 : Impact Play w/ Bae Irene — your perfect little girlfriend just needed to be knocked off her high horse for being a spoiled

Day 20 : Role Play w/ Lisa Manoban — lisa wants to show you her new routine but she wants to add a little spice to it.

Day 21 : Size Kink w/ Son Chaeyoung — teasing goes a little too far and you remind Chaeyoung just who you are.

Day 22 : Humiliation w/ Chou Tzuyu

Day 23 : Thigh Riding w/ Shin Ryujin

Day 24 : Temperature Play w/ Lee Chaeryeong

Day 25 : Body Worship w/ Yoo Jeongyeon

Day 26 : Edging w/ Kim Solar

Day 27 : Dirty Talk w/ Moon Byuli

Day 28 : Shower Sex w/ Park Jihyo

Day 29 : Strip Tease w/ Kim Jennie

Day 30 : Brat Taming w/ Shin Yuna

Day 31 : Daddy Kink w/ Shin Ryujin

—i got shy writing this list since i am sharing a room with my brother's girlfriend 😭 also this is an incomplete list but i hope you're all excited!! i will see you lovelies tomorrow!! keep safe everyone!! - r

[albed-hoe]

RAHHH i’m back 👹👹👹

today i made the subconcious decision to pull for c1 hutao with my 30 saved wishes for furina and genuinely cannot tell if i’m upset abt it or not (i have so many unbuilt 5 stars it’s TERRIBLE i cannot afford to add her to my collection 😭.)

BUT IM NOT HERE TO RANT YOUR EAR OFF!

i’m here to deliver that lynette version you oh so requested 😘

NOTE: IK YOU LEGIT JUST GOT BACK INTO WRITING SO DONT FEEL THE NEED TO WRITE THIS ASAP JUST LET IT SIT UNTIL YOU FEEL UR CREATIVE MIND JUICES FLOWING AND TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOURSELF 👹👹👹👹

but yes, i thought while it’s fresh in my mind i’ll submit this entry to you for when you feel like writing this specific prompt 😁

SO without further adieu,

FOUND FAMILY /w COMFORT PT 2: so this is following a similar path to my freminet one. basically m!reader decided to take a peaceful walk around the court of fontaine with freminet (it can be a continuation of the first part or a completely seperate writing piece, up to you!) and on the way they run into lynette. ofc they invite her along and ask why she isn’t with her brother, and she explains how he’s off with the traveller on some errands.

they all decide to sit down to have some tea & sweets and m!reader offers to order (bc freminet is a lil shy and lynette jus isn’t a people gal), so freminet goes to sit at a table & lynette stands in line to wait for the order after m!reader has finished paying (once again, lyney scored bae material 😍).

after m!reader sits down with freminet and starts a lil conversation abt what he found diving a few days ago, he notices lynette getting hit on by some random dude. she’s visibly uncomfortable and attempting to move away from this man but he is PERSISTENT (not physically touching her but he’s pretty pushy)

ofc, m!reader isn’t gonna tolerate this vile behaviour towards his future sister-in-law, so he goes up to the man and creates distance between the two and (not so kindly) tells the dude to fuck off. creepo notices the vision on our person (idm what element 🫶🏻) and quickly scurries off.

m!reader verbally assures lynette (he’s wary of making her uncomfortable by hugging her bc ifykyk) that he won’t let anything happen to her whilst he’s around and lynette gives a lil smile (FJAKFKWKFKQ I LOVE THE TRIO SM 😭)

eventually the tea & cakes come and freminet runs up to lynette worried abt her, but she jus reassures him that she’s okay and they enjoy a peaceful afternoon snack together <33

later on m!reader gets a knock on his door, only to open it and find a teary eyed lyney with a massive fuckin bouquet. ofc we’re in shock, but before we question everything he chucks them on the floor of our house and gives us a massive hug, thanking us once again for looking out so much for his family (with lynette’s heartbreaking backstory i just know something like this would freak lyney tf out). we just hug him back and say how his family is our family and how he loves lyney’s siblings like his own (fixing my family issues w this request for real 😔) and i’m lyney is 100% planning their marriage once more in his head 😭.



Found Family (Lynette ver.)

Characters: Freminet, Lynette & Lyney x GN!Reader (no mention of gender, but reader is putting ring on Lyney's finger in daydream at the end)

Summary: Lynette is attacked by a creep, but Lyney's future husband/partner comes to the rescue!

Warnings: Creep attacking Lynette, fluff, silly little Lyney at the end

Word count: 674

A/n: Okayyy I have an ask from over a year ago about reader’s first time with Kazuha and I wanna write that so bad?? Do you guys want that too?👀 (This is not a continuation of the Freminet ver.)

The streets of the Court of Fontaine were busy as a usual weekend afternoon would make them. You were walking around, observing the different food stalls and stores with Freminet trailing you. The boy was looking around at different things that interested him, tugging on your sleeve to show you items from time to time. (HELP HE’S SO ADORABLE) Suddenly, you spotted a familiar whisp of hair in the distance. You take Freminet’s hand and pull him to catch up with the other person.

“Lynette!” You call out to the boy’s sister, catching her attention. She turns around and gives you a nod in greeting. “Hello, [Y/N].” She ruffles her brother’s hair to greet him, as she usually would.

Lynette had a good feeling about you as soon as Lyney had introduced you to her. She had a knack for being able to ‘detect’ someone’s intentions and from day one, she was sure you were a good person. Normally she would keep her guard up and try to protect her brothers from people who would try to take advantage of them, but… You were different. She approved of you.

You invite them both for some tea and sweets at a smaller café, bringing them over to find a table. You ask them what they both want and head over to place the order at the counter. As you finish telling the server the orders and paying, you return to the table and sit with Freminet, striking up light conversation. When you turn to the lineup to see where Lynette is, you find a man getting quite close to her. You knew she was not a fan of social interactions, so it was a little odd to see someone acting so familiar with the girl while she was looking nervous. Something about his mannerisms was getting to you, but you could not quite figure out what it was until he touched her upper arm. The sudden disrespect towards your (future) sister-in-law prompts you to walk up to the two, and you grab the man’s arm holding on hard enough to make him let go.

“Kindly leave, before I make you.” You say, with a sarcastic smile on your face. Lynette is standing behind a hand resting on the area the man had been grabbing. He laughs in disbelief and scoffs.

“Or what? She obviously wants me.” Lynette turns away in disgust to wait at the counter for the order. Your vision glows and your grip strengthens.

“Or you’ll regret it.” An expression of fear settles on his face as he sees the anger in your eyes. You let his arm go and he turns around and leaves without saying another word. You turn back to Lynette, placing a gentle hand on her shoulder to get her attention.

“You okay?” You ask her. She nods and you both take the order and join Freminet at the table.

The tea and sweets get gobbled up and the three of you make your way back to the siblings’ home after finishing up. You say your goodbyes and you part ways with them, heading back to your small apartment.

A few hours later, a knock is heard at the door. You open it to see Lyney holding a massive bouquet with tears in his eyes. Before you can question him, he drops the bouquet on the ground and throws himself in your arms.

“Thank you so much for taking care of my siblings!!” He says into your neck, your arms coming to wrap around his back after you recover from your shock.

After a few moments, you pull him away from you and set your hands on both his shoulders.

“Your family is mine, Lyney. You entrusted your siblings with me, so I cared for them.” His eyes water up again and he hugs you even harder than the first time. As he cries into your shoulder, his mind keeps replaying a scene of you slipping a ring over his finger to tie the knot between you both forever.

Not 100% proud of this one but eh :/

[be-the-glenn-to-my-maggie]

This is totally stupid, but, i was thinking about the Nocorro secret hang out spot.

So this place is the same little river that we sees at the start of avatar 2, a place where as kids Neteyam, Spider and the others could easily spent all day.

Now Neteyam family doesn't go there as much, maybe during summer to cool off a little, but apart from that the place is abandoned.

So is the perfect place for the two to spent time alone, only themselves.

Now, let's imagine they got together when Spider was 13 and Neteyam 12, at the start they only spent time there, talking, looking at the sky and clouds, staying hand in hand with eachother for hours.

During their first year togheter, the RDA returned, so they couldn't see eachother as much as they would have liked.

So they arranged this schedule, Tuesday evening was when both (especially Neteyam) were free.

Date at 17:30/5:30 pm, if i say that Spider would jump on top of Neteyam im not kidding, they saw eachother during the other days of the week.

But is not like they could search for eachother physical contact, their intereation could be only talking about "stupid" stuff, like the war and raids, the others, arms.

Thing they didn't "care", because of crouse they only wanted to talk about eachother and their love.

So when they were togheter, they talked about eachother week and how annoying and boring it was without the other.

Finally during their second year togheter they kissed, don't get me wrong, they did kiss but until there the kisses were innocent, only lip on lip.

Now those two are 15 and 14, and they could stay together only half evening, plus Neteyam started going on raids, and jesus Christ that scared Spider.

So I draw the start of their "passionate" kisses at this age.

Then

Spider got kidnapped, Neteyam did go to their secret place but only for crying.

Let's suppose the Sully stayed a week before going away, Neteyam dropped all his responsibilities and spent all the evenings crying in their secret spot.

Secretly hopping for Spider to appear, but nothing, he had to go away and abandon his clan, home, people and boyfriend.

And on top of that he needed to show that it didn't weigh on him, that he was okay, he needed to be the rock for his siblings.

When I picture the nocorro hang out spot (which trust me, I have pictured before, don't worry) is always on some high rock face on the way up to the Hallelujah Mountains. Far away from the village but not a crazy climb, but enough of a climb that when they started going Lo'ak couldn't make it and Kiri would get distracted before getting there. Can't tell you why but I'm always picturing rocks.

That is so sad though, picturing Neteyam holding it together because no one knows and he doesn't want to add even more onto everyone's plates, and he is afraid his mom will be less likely to rescue Spider if he tells. So he can only truly worry, let go, and grieve when he goes to the spot.

[idsb]

hi im new here can you give a brief rundown of like you lol?? where youve lived, jobs, partners, interests, give me the idsb lore please!!!!!

hi!! sure, I have a lot of new followers and I was just thinking the other day abt this and how my blog is like 70/30 my personal life v Taylor so that must be confusing for new people. so yes! here's the spark notes:

My name is Holly and I just turned 28! I grew up outside of Boston and lived in NYC for ~10 years after I went to art school there. I dropped out of college after one semester to pursue my actual dream of touring with artists. After I dropped out I spent a while willingly homeless in NYC so that I could establish myself & my career there. Eventually it worked & I had been doing freelance photography, videography, graphic design and merch sales as steady income since ~2017. I was in a 5 year, emotionally abusive relationship with my high school sweetheart and finally ended it in 2018. A bit after this, I went to Australia for the first time with my then-friend now-boyfriend (Nov 2018). I've been obsessed with Australia since I was like 5 years old and it was an incredible adventure. I spent about 3 weeks there alone without then-friend, and during those 3 weeks met a Man. The last night we spent in Australia on this trip was Christmas Eve, and said man invited me to have an outdoor Love Actually screening and have a wine picnic with him and all his friends. it was one of the best nights of my life. We hooked up and he singlehandedly cured some sex-related fears I had from the previous relationship and I couldn't stop thinking about it for months. Back in America (Jan 2019) I entered my hoe phase in a never-ending quest for validation and slept with every guitarist I'd ever worked with while meanwhile having a big mental breakdown. Enter a John Mayer vibing man we called the Guitarist here, and a lot of Bad Shit he did to me in his own validation quest mental breakdown (May-August 2019). Clearly my only choice was to fly back to Australia to see the other guy! And I did (September 2019)! Then I was mega depresso when I went home bc my life felt hopeless & I'd already lived out all the hope it had going for it :) I continued my hoe phase and chronicled it via Spice Nights where I’d just answer nsfw asks and give advice for like 8 hours straight. This is waxing over it but it was chaotic and I cannot understate the Depression (Feb 2020).

Then the pandemic happened whomp whomp. I lost all my gigs and posted about it on Tumblr dot com, this blog gained a very large following sort of bc of being a Taylor blog and sort of bc of live-blogging all the drama. ms Taylor Swift saw it and she sent me $3,000 to cover my rent for all of lockdown. a lot happened as a result of that but in the end I realized it was not smart to stay in NYC and spent summer 2020 roadtripping around the US with my then-friend who had first come to Australia with me, who had since joined the leagues of guitar-playing-employer-i-was-sleeping-with (there were 4 in total but I was in loveeeeee w this one). Big Cruel Summer vibes. my friend group exploded partially as a result of my behavior and partially bc they were cunts who didn't care about John Mayer vibe man manipulating me. So then I said fuck it and moved to Montana to work in a national park w guitar guy I Actually Loved who had become my boyfriend at that point, and we lived there until winter 2021. Then I started touring again, got insanely successful, was making more money than most people I knew with salaried jobs and booking work all over the world, my relationship ended over some drama I found out about way after the fact but then we got back together & moved in together (May 2023). Going great. Then I got so fucking burnt out from my job I was like stop the presses I am fucking off to Australia I can't do the music industry and the mega late-stage capitalism anymore. so now I live in Melbourne and am a bartender at a fancy cocktail bar and my relationship is sort of a LDR but I’m going home soon maybe(?) and that is what you missed on Glee!!!!

[dummysmartdeviant]

Hi my name is laci n i relapsed again.

I didnt meant to stop fully this time like i did last year

but my last tumblr was deactivated n life stress is made it like really hard to embrace my dumb desires

so i thought that was ok unti like i got bad again om may 5 i didnt know how badly i missed it until i was too far gone n now i think ill just give in for now

im almost 30 m thats really scary tbh but also excitimg n i wish i could start my bimbo trainin again n just be happy

so I'm here to get worse,.please feel free to help me or use me hehe!

I was trained for almost two years before unfer my last Owner which is who started my corruption manipulation kinks but He also got me into bimbo training in a very degrading way bc ive always beena humilation slut n ive fought the cravings lots in the 5 years since His influence but I have gotten worse over the years so ways i have is I used to have really good grammar n spelling bc imma perfectionist n I was always like insecure about appearing to be stupid but I turned off my autocorrect ummm sometime last year i think which is why my spelling is so horrible n around that time I started using custom set background images on my phone's keyboard to confuse myself make typing even harder. at one point last.year i had 50 saved bimbo themes but i deleted them all before my first relapse and downloaded maybe 20 last Nov So the keyboard theme on my phone is changing daily now to help my current relapse, I'm always looking for fun new pics with fun captions to use as backgrounds the more colorful n degrading rhe better for my brain! hmmm okie so like im sure theres more, its fun to wonder how much of me has been subtly changed over the years by men but like I also have Swiss cheese memory so it can be really hard to remember sometimes so I think that's all I can think of right now.. Like I still have boundaries and I still keep myself safe because I am like super traumatized unfortunately but I do feel sometimes like I am being influenced an changed slowly n thats like so so so so so hot ughh

Anyways I'm so excited to be back on Tumblr because I tried going on Reddit which I hadn't used in years and I just really didn't like the vibes over there anymore, it doesn't feel like a place where I can really express my true thoughts safely

[bratshaws]

goodness gracious 48. brb x oc

a/n: glad to say im happier with this chapter :)

check out the fic's playlist made by the sweet @wiipes !!

pairing: plus size!oc x rooster

warnings: FLUFF, Bradley being horny but it's not smut is just a dab of suggestive really

chapters:

1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10/11/12/13/14/15/16/17/18/19/20/21/22/23/24/25/26/27/28/29/30/31/32/33/34/35/36/37/38/39/40/41/42/43/44

45/46/47

(pls let me know if you want to be added to the taglist!!)

taglist: @mirandastuckinthe80s @roosterschanelslut @wiipes @lcahwriter @shrimping-for-all @gretagerwigsmuse @frenchtoastix

@lizzie-rdj @fanboyluvr @atarmychick007 @comebacktoearthpls

@peachiicherries @mak-32 @lizziespidiepridie @roosterswifey @ollyoxenfrees @piceous21 @sqrlgrl22 @hofficoffi @lexhalstead3 

@lorilane33 @legendarydreamersharkparty @luckyladycreator2 @emilybradshaw @j-6o @louisahale @leobabbyyy @kulicny @winter-run

-

“So,” he begins watching Beatrice place the ornaments on her tree, which wasn’t that big it barely reached his chest, “Your aunt Martha and your father are twins.” she nods, smiling, ripping a box of christmas balls open and turning the small tree around to expose the other side, “And they are the oldest.”

“Yes, then you get my uncle Roberto, then my uncle Elia, my aunt Yvette and my aunt Regina, who’s the Bitch Trio’s mother.” she scoffs, shaking her head, “And my mom has my aunts Fabrizzia, Fernanda, Maria and my uncles Luis and Marcelo. So both sides have a lot of siblings.”

Rooster arched his eyebrows with wonder, trying to figure out how the hell was her childhood like since she had so many aunts and uncles. He doesn’t know how the subject of her family showed up, maybe it was because she was talking about how Christmas was the time they’d all spend together. He knew some people had a lot of relatives, but honestly, he never met one until Beatrice. 

“That’s…a whole lot of people.” she nods while laughing, still arranging her ornaments and thanking him when he hands her another box, “Were they at the wedding? Your mother’s siblings I mean.”

“Some of them were.” Beatrice explains, “Some lived out of state and couldn’t come. They all know my paternal family from childhood, my parents grew up in the same street.” she smiles, adjusting herself on her knees so she’d get a higher branch “And my dad’s move, if you want to call it that, was during a basketball game against the girls from the neighborhood was to steal the ball from my mom’s hand. They started dating soon after.” 

Bradley smiles seeing how her voice softened when speaking about her parents, he knows the feeling, he does get the same way talking about his own, “That’s really sweet.” he doesn’t know much about how his parents met, he didn’t ask his mother especially since it’d bring back painful memories, but Mav always said it was very sweet no matter what. So he accepted that instead of questioning her about it. “And they’ve been together ever since.”

“They have. I mean, they are both sixty-five so…” she counts on her fingers, muttering the numbers to herself, “Forty-eight years? If you count the time they started dating.” 

“That’s a long time.”

“It is, my dad always said he knew they’d get married.” she smiles, shrugging her shoulders, “I always thought it was very romantic.” but before she could complete her sentence, she winced in pain, one of her hands touching her womb with a frown, “Ah, damn it.”

Rooster straightened immediately, “What’s wrong? Everything okay?”

“Yeah,I’m on my period.” she groaned, slowly pushing herself to her feet so she could walk to the kitchen, “My period cramps can be really strong sometimes. I’ll be fine, it’s just a matter of getting something warm.” 

Ah, that explains why she was so tired yesterday when he came over and just fell asleep the second they got back from the Hard Deck. Bradley followed her into the kitchen, frowning when she just held her middle and pressed her forehead on the sink’s cool countertop, “What do you need? I can get it for you.”

“No,no, it’s okay.” she says quickly, “I can do it.”

But he wasn’t convinced, he just stepped closer to her, “Bea,” she groaned again, biting her lower lip, “Maybe you should lie down, I can make you some tea or whatever is it you need.” his girlfriend makes an annoyed noise “How bad is it?”

“It’s like a baby t-rex chewing my insides, Rooster.” her tone was a bit snappy, but he knew she wasn’t mad at him, she then whimpered, turning her body towards him and hugging his middle to which he reciprocated with his arms around her shoulders, “Having a uterus really sucks.” he chuffed out a soft laugh, biting his lip when she glowered up at him with her eyebrows low and lips furled down into a scowl, “Don’t laugh at my demise.”

He held his hands up defensively, “Sorry, sorry, you are right. I shouldn’t do that.” he then leaned down to pick her up by the back of her legs, which immediately wrapped around his waist and her arms around his neck, Beatrice sighing in relief when he did, “You okay?”

“You are very warm.” comes her muffled voice from his shoulder, pressing herself even tighter against him, “It helps.” well, if it helped he already knew what to do. He took the two of them to her living room and settled onto the couch, still holding her in his arms. Jolene’s sleeping form peeks one eye open when she feels movement in her favored furniture, but relaxes when she sees it’s her two favorite humans who sat down.

He wasn’t the type of guy who wouldn’t understand how painful these things are. His mother raised him to know, respect and understand what a period was. Rooster grew up knowing more than half the guys of his class just because his mother made sure it was something everyone should know. He knew some women had stronger flows to the point they had to go to the hospital, but he wasn’t sure if that was Beatrice’s case, she just seemed to be in a lot of pain but not enough that it was dangerous.

And if he could be her own heating pad, he wasn’t complaining.

Every now and again she’d moan out a soft complaint and hold herself closer to him, curling onto a ball against his chest as the cramps pulsated through her body but then she’d relax and sigh heavily, warming his skin when she did so. Bradley just kissed the top of her head, rubbed her lower back in slow circles knowing it could be helpful “That’s nice.” she mutters, turning her head to look at him from his shoulder.

He smiles, facing her with his hand still moving, “Good, I’m trying my best.” He says, “Is it helping?” she pauses a minute to think, her face scrunching in pain briefly but she nods, “Do you need me to do anything else?” 

“No, just stay here.” she murmurs,tucking her arms between his chest and hers, breathing in his cologne deeply and easing out the breath through her lips “That’s good enough.”

“You sure?”

“Roos, I can’t really understand what you are asking me because I’m trying not to die. So please just, just stay there.”

Bradley couldn’t help the soft chuckle that made its way past his lips, but he kept his hands on her either way. He doesn’t know how long they stay there, just sitting on the couch listening to the sounds from outside and Jolene’s quiet breathing next to them. But Beatrice eventually relaxed completely, rubbing her face with both hands and breathing hard against her palms, dragging them down her face so her eyes could blink up at him, bleary and a bit unfocused.

His brown eyes soften once they meet gazes, tucking a few strands of brown hair behind her ear, “Hey, gorgeous.” she smiles sweetly, leaning into his palm when he cups her cheek, “How are you feeling?”

“I’m better, thank you.” comes her quiet reply as she gives him an apologetic look, “I’m sorry for snapping at you.” it wasn’t even that bad, he thought, but she thought she probably hurt his feelings by lashing out because of the pain.

“Bea, it’s okay. You are in pain and you don’t know how to deal with it.” he shrugs, “So you have some anger because of it. That’s fine?” she makes a quiet noise, furrowing her eyebrows with a look that clearly meant if he was really sure. Bradley tsks, leaning his lower back deeper into the couch and unwrapping her legs from his waist so she could sit sideways on his lap, “It’s fine, Bea. I promise, you didn’t hurt my feelings.”

Beatrice chews her lower lip, dropping her temple on his collarbone as she sighs, “Okay…if you are sure.”

“I’m more than sure.” he chuckles, kissing the top of her head, “You’d need to do a lot more for me to get upset at you. This isn’t something you plan, baby. You can’t plan when it’ll hurt a lot to the point you’ll get too angry and will tell someone to fuck off.” Beatrice giggles gently when he says it, making his chest swell with relief “So, you don’t have to worry. Okay?”

“Okay…” she replies, pressing her cheek to his collarbones, smiling sweetly as she plays with the buttons of his Hawaiian shirt, “You are so understanding.” she comments casually, “Not a lot of guys are.”

He purses his lips, rubbing his thumb on the outer side of her denim covered thigh,” Well, not a lot of guys were raised with a mom like mine.” he laughs, “She set me up for what I’d encounter when I got older, so, “ he finishes his explanation with a shrug, “It’s easier to understand.”

Beatrice looks up at him with hearts in her eyes, her cheeks reddening with a little smile forming over her lips as she stares at his face, not being able to contain how her chest warmed up whenever he spoke. How the hell did she get so lucky? Beatrice leans up to kiss his chin, right on top of the tiny scars he had there, making her way up to his lips, humming happily when they touched, “I still appreciate it.” she says sweetly, “It means a lot to me.”

He knew what she meant, he knew that the reason why she appreciated it so much was because she had a shitty ex who wouldn’t help her out. She never voiced it, but he knew - especially considering what he managed to find out about him- what that piece of shit had done to her before. 

Speaking of which, he also explained to Shells that the red truck had nothing to do with Eric. She was very surprised and confused, as he was when he found out about it, but said that even if it wasn’t related to Eric it was still weird he was trying to win Beatrice over. Of course she used a more colorful language when referring to his antics, repeating she wanted to beat him up and that it was part of their deal.

He hoped that Eric wouldn't show up for a while,Damon said he’d be in the Bahamas or whatever was that he left, as long as he stayed away from Beatrice he’d be fine with it. 

He helped her finish decorating her house, always close to her in case she felt too much pain or just needed a pause. He actually had a lot of fun and since he was taller than she was he could reach areas she had issues with, like above her doors and the windows on the loft.

Beatrice’s soft gasp and clasped hands as she looked around made his heart flutter with affection, she looked so happy, the complete opposite from a few minutes ago and even if she was in pain she didn’t seem to care, “Gosh, it looks!! So good Roos!” she claps her hands excitedly, “Oh I’m so, so happy! Thank you for helping me!”

Bradley just smiles, approaching her from behind to hug her waist, kissing her cheekbone with a soft smack “Anytime, gorgeous. I’m happy I could help.” she’s gently touching her Christmas tree, watching the transparent ornament with the rooster inside move after she nudged it. She leans into his embrace when he drops his chin to her shoulder, moving some hair out of the way so he could kiss her lavender scented neck.

“You did more than you know.” she smiles, turning her head to meet his lips halfway, pulling back when he tries to deepen it, stepping away from his grasp so she could walk back to the kitchen, “Stop looking at my ass.” she calls without turning back, but her boyfriend indeed was looking without any remorse.

“It’s not my fault it’s so nice.” he tries to explain, leaning on the kitchen’s door frame with his hands in his pockets, biting his lower lip with his eyes following her movements around the kitchen, “And just out there for me to look.” Beatrice’s eyes narrow in his direction but her smile is still present as she warms water in her electric kettle, grabbing a tea bag from the cabinet. 

Beatrice shakes her head amusedly, smiling more when his arms return around her waist and he watches with interest as she prepares her tea, “You are terrible.” she says softly, “But I guess that’s why I love you.”

He grins, pressing a kiss to the side of her head, then another to her cheek, “I thought it was because of my breathtaking good looks.” oh he’d never let that live down would he? Beatrice laughs quietly, trying to ignore him the best she could but he was never one to be easily ignored, no matter what, “Or was it something else?”

“I think…I don’t know,” she shrugs, “You are really handsome, and musically talented…but I don’t know, I really liked how you were with your friends I guess. I really liked your smile the first time I saw it.” Beatrice’s cheeks return to it’s usual crimson color as she remembers the scene of him showing up and hugging Payback with a laugh leaving his lips, “And I don’t know, everything else that came after…I really like your hands too.”

“My hands?” she nods, grabbing the said limbs from around her to hold them up, running her fingers on the back of his hands, following the tendons until it reached his wrists. 

“They are very nice.” she says, still drawing random lines on his skin, “And I l-like how um…” she placed her hand on top of his, the size comparison was enough to make her whole body shudder “H-How….. big…..they are.” she said the word so silently he almost didn’t hear her. But he did and he couldn’t help the smirk forming over his lips.

The said big hands returned to her waist, following the tapered part down the flare of her hips, squeezing the meaty part there enough to make her squeak, “Do you?” Beatrice nods mutely, chewing her lower lip with her face red, “That’s news to me.” but he wasn’t mad about it, not at all, this new information could be very useful in the future even more than it already was. The brunette just busies herself in pouring the hot water inside her mug instead of her boyfriend’s known teasing nature. “What else is it that you like about me? I’m so curious now.”

Bea scoffs with a grin, rolling her eyes, “You already know I like everything else about you.”

“Yes, but be specific.” he smiles, “If you could.”

She looks towards him over her shoulder, squinting her eyes playfully at his boyish smirk and amused face, sighing in defeat, “Well…I like your eyes too. And…your neck.” her green irises drop to the column of his throat that was never hidden from her hungry eyes “I really like your neck.”

He was reminded of their first time when she bit his trapezius, the perfect indentations of her teeth were deep on his skin. Clearly not enough to break it, but the bruise stayed there for a good month before it disappeared for real and God it was such a nice souvenir to have when he was gone. Bradley makes a sound deep in his throat, pressing little kisses to her jawline, “Hmm, yeah,I remember it.” he chuckles, nosing the curve of her neck “Anythin’ else? I’m all ears.”

“You are a menace no matter where I look at ,Bradley.” she giggles softly, earning a laugh from him as well and another series of quick kisses to her jawline.

“Do you want to know what’s my favorite part about you?”

“My ass?”

“That too, but,” he taps her ass cheek gently, “I really love your eyes.” The said eyes turn to look at him, long thick lashes fluttering when she blinks, “Yeah, “he whistles low, “Look at those emeralds.” Beatrice gasps out a laugh, repeating the word as if she couldn’t believe it, her cheeks turning into a deeper shade of red than before. “I meant it when I said all you had to do was look at me and I was a goner.”

Beatrice’s gaze mellowed when he spoke, her heart fluttering with butterflies like always, “...yeah I remember.” she whispers, thumbing her mug’s ring over and over as she looks down at her tea, “No one…ever called them that, you know? Emeralds. They always said they were pretty or…” she shrugs “I don’t know it’s…it’s really nice to hear.”

Bradley’s smile softens and he hugs her closer to his chest, closing his eyes as he buries his nose on her neck, “I have a lot of these saved, just for you gorgeous.” he mutters against her skin. He meant that too, if he could tell her all the compliments he had saved up for her he’d never stop talking. Beatrice was sweet, so incredibly sweet and it hurt him to know she hasn’t been complimented or shown that sort of affection before, he knows sometimes she feels awkward when receiving them, her blush is stronger and she tries to play it off but she needs to hear how truthfully beautiful she is.

He waits for her to take a sip from her tea then set the mug back down, “Alright, now.” he picks her up bridal style without warning, making Bea squeak out a yelp of surprise, holding herself up by hugging his neck, “Grab your mug,” he leans close enough for her to get it while still smiling, “And we are going to watch some more Drag Race, how’s that?”

“Sounds perfect.”

-

Beatrice was surprised when she saw Evelyn’s tall frame walking inside the Hard Deck, casually, hands in her jacket’s pockets as she strolled in with her face in a neutral mask, “Ev?” the other woman smiles, lifting her hand in a greeting, “Well, that’s a surprise! What are you doing here?”

Evelyn settles herself on the stool in front of the bar with a soft sigh, then interlaces her fingers on the bartop, “Was in the neighborhood.” she says, giving Penny a nod as a greeting. Beatrice stares at her while she’s wiping a glass, then back to where Rooster and the others were sitting, Jake hasn’t noticed her yet - if he did he played it off really well.

“Yeah?” the brunette smiles, grabbing a water bottle for her friend who immediately opened it to take a sip,”It’s just you’ve been coming…a lot, you know? Shells told me you’ve showed up…um a lot more than you usually would, which was…never.” her friend just sipped her water in response, not answering. Beatrice could see it, even if Evelyn didn’t, that the sudden interest of her coming to the Hard Deck had anything to do with the atmosphere or how she was ‘in the neighborhood’ as she said.

It was all about Jake and herself. And Beatrice’s romantic little heart couldn’t handle how happy she was for her friend. She hoped really hard that whatever this thing with Jake that was currently being developed worked, because he really seems to like her and Evelyn, even in her cool façade, seemed to like him too even if it was a little bit.

“Actually, there’s a reason I came here.” Evelyn says when Shells approaches the bar top, setting the tray down so Beatrice could place the glasses, “We wanna go to the Shootout tomorrow.”

Shootout was a paintball arena close to Northride and one of their favorite pastimes during the weekends if the volleyball practices weren’t available. It was probably the wildes, craziest fun any of them had together, not to mention that the Shootdown was close to The Den so that meant they’d always leave and have a snack before going back to the dorms.

And they would be open until nine pm during weekends.

“Oh, I’m in!”Shells says with a huge smile, bouncing on the spot, “Are you kidding me? How long has it been since we went to Shootout?”

“They were expanding the arena during our final year,” Beatrice adds, “It seems super fun.Is everyone going?” Evelyn nods and Bea looks back at Shells with a little smile, “I’m in too. I’ll just have to talk to Roos about it.”

Shells looks back at the officers, jutting her thumb in their direction, “They could join us,” she suggests, ‘Hey the more the fucking merrier, right? Plus it’ll be amazing to have so many people in a team.”

Beatrice hasn’t considered it, but thinking about it it really seems like a cool idea, she turned her head towards Evelyn to check her reaction and her friend just seemed…neutral. No anger nor surprise, just a neutral cool façade as she took in the news and then she nodded. Wow, she must really be liking Jake because she wouldn’t say yes otherwise. Bea bites her lower lip, letting Shells know she’d tell them she had to take their drinks there anyway.

Once she walks out from behind the bar, Rooster immediately perks up, “Hi,” he coos as she walks past him, his body leaning closer as he holds on the pool cue, trying to follow her with his head, “Aren’t you a sight to sore eyes?”

Beatrice just gives him an eyeroll before giving everyone else their drinks, completely ignoring his antics the best she could, “Evelyn is here,” Jake’s head immediately turned to the bar counter where she was, sipping her water and talking to Penny, “She invited us to go to the Shootout, are any of you interested?”

It was Fanboy who answered, his eyes widening, “Wait, the paintball arena?!” Beatrice nods, smiling at the pilot’s enthusiasm, “I’ve always wanted to go there!” Soon enough it’s a cacophony of supportive answers and positive reactions, they all were game to join. Beatrice sent Shells a smile and a nod, to which the blonde pumped her fist in the air with triumph.

“I’ll let you guys know what time we plan on going,” she says grinning, “It’ll be a lot of fun.”

When the brunette turned to Bradley, who was still looking at her with his eyes low and mouth curved into a little smirk, putting the cue away to follow her back to the bar, “Those pants should be illegal.” she hears him say, quiet enough that only they could hear and Beatrice rolls her eyes again, setting the tray down the bar top.

“If they were that means I’d never wear them again, is that what you want?” she asks casually, but seeing how he just dropped his eyes down the length of her legs she already got her answer. She chuckles, walking around the bar as Rooster sits down in the usual stool he always chose when he wanted to be closer to Beatrice, Shells and Evelyn talking not too far from them.

“So, when were you going to tell me,” he begins, leaning on a hand, “That you liked paintball?”

Beatrice laughs, fixing the bun on top of her head with a shrug, “Oh,I don’t know, I guess it slipped my mind, you know?” he hums, not believing, “I mean, it’ll be fun, we all will have a lot of fun there. And then we can go to The Den, you guys will love it there. It’s the food joint I told you about, it’s right in front of our college.”

Bradley arches his eyebrows, “Really? I didn’t know that.” he was curious now, he had only seen her college’s colors at the game, and the obvious hyena mascot, but he had never seen the actual college itself. Plus, Beatrice seemed very excited, why wouldn’t he be excited too, “So…” he looks around the bar conspicuously, leaning on his forearms, “Shall we make another prize ticket, gorgeous? I could be wrong but I don’t think you’ve used yours yet.”

His girlfriend stilled momentarily but she bit back her smile the best she could, “I’m saving it up.” she explains with a shrug, “Plus what if I win again? Would it be fair to have two tickets in my power?”

He chuckles, dragging his eyes down her body with a soft whistle leaving his lips, “Maybe I’ll win this time.” he says, shrugging, “Make it a bit interesting you know?...but I won’t use it now, I know you are,” he makes a gesture with his hands, referring to her obvious cramps “But I can save it up, just like you are.”

Beatrice’s eyes soften and her smile widens, “You are too sweet, thank you Roos.” he smiles back, his cheeks flushing just the tiniest bit,”But…I’ll think about it, you know? We'll see how it goes tomorrow.” she explains while filling a glass and handing it to Penny who walks out from behind the counter leaving her and Shells to take care of it.

He leans on a fist, following Beatrice with his eyes as she moves about, “It’s just because I still have that idea,” he taps his temple, “Deep within you know? Can’t get it out of my head…I can give you a hint if you’d like, maybe it’ll make you think that winning isn’t that important–”

“Bradley Bradshaw,” she says quietly, feigning offense, “You will not bribe me with whatever it is you are planning, we’ll have to do this the old way, following the rules.”

Evelyn and Shells watch the scene from the other side of the bar, smiling at the interaction with the blonde shaking her head, “God, they are disgusting.” she chuckles, “...but she looks so happy.”

“She does.” Evelyn smiles, her eyes traveling from the couple to a known Texan pilot who was already looking her way, which makes the black haired woman snatch her eyes back in a panic. But Shells sees it and she just smirks down at her.

“You know, you can come up with a lot of excuses as to why you are suddenly interested in coming to this Navy bar,” Shells begins, grabbing another water bottle for Evelyn, “But I know that you know that I know, that it’s because of Hangman.”

Evelyn freezes up, her brown eyes narrowing menacingly towards her friend who looked like the cat who just ate the canary. She parts her lips but nothing comes out, which makes Shells look so infuriatingly pleased that Evelyn feels even more annoyed, “I don’t know what you mean.”

“Oh, come on Simpson, admit it,” she grins, leaning on a fist, “You like him.” Evelyn’s eyes widened again, panic returning as she stares up at the blonde woman, the hold on the water bottle so tight the plastic creaks under her grasp, “Or better yet, let’s make it interesting…we’ll both be in the same team tomorrow but the first one that reaches twenty hit points against the opposite team gets to snatch an answer from the other.”

“What would I even know about you?” Evelyn asks, narrowing her eyes when Shells shrugs.

“I don’t know, I have some skeletons in my closet that not even my aunt knows about.” she holds out her hand wiggling her fingers, “Come on Simpson, is that fear in your eyes? Huh?” Evelyn looks from her hand to her face, jaw moving as she considers it before she sighs heavily and clasps it tightly, holding it for a few seconds then letting it go.

“Deal.” Evelyn mutters, “Best of three rounds?”

Shells smirk only widens, “Best of three.”

[chrisgetsmewet]

It Was For The Right Cause

Part 1

I wake up this morning to my phone going off. I ignored it for a bit because it couldn't have been my alarm clock i was suspended. I checked my phone and it was nick texting me, then i checked the time

7:34 am

Is he crazy or does he want me to strangle him, i check the messages.

From nick:

Y/n?

Delivered 7:30 am

do you wanna get breakfast with us before we go to school.

Delivered 7:32 am

We're gonna leave without you

Delivered 7:33 am

I could drop the good off to you if you want

Seen 7:34

To nick:

yea sure give me a few minutes

Seen 7:36

From nick:

Ok be quick we're gonna be late

I rush out of my bed, heading to my bathroom. I brush my teeth, then my hair. I just wear my pajama pants, a tank top paired with a hoodie over it just incase i get cold then i slip on my uggs.

And down the stairs i went running out the door until my step dad luke called out for me.

I stopped and closing the door.

"Yeah..?" Turning away from the door, my attention on him.

And gosh I should have acted like i didn't hear him and went out anyway.

"Where are you going?" He repeated

"To meet some friends" in fact i was meeting with nick, matt, and chris. I wasn't trying to take any longer, i told him what he wanted to hear so i open the door again.

"yeah not happening, actually close the door your grounded. I heard about the fight. that was what? your 10th one this year. Might i ask why you got in that fight?" He leaned against the kitchen counter,crossing his arms.

I roll my eyes at that question and look over at my mom coming out her room.

"mom luke won't let me go out" I complained to her, pouting a little so she can some sympathy.

She looked, glancing over at him. Then at me, then back at him again. As if she was choosing maybe more deciding but still...

she let out a sigh closing her eyes, rubbing the bridg of her nose.

"luke let the girl go out she's gonna come back"

he hits the counter causing us both to flench "NO, no one ever listens to me, so fine go out do what you want"

my mom walked over to him puting her hand on his shoulder to try and calm him.

He shrugged her off.

I leave out the house cause i refuse to watch the two fight over something so dumb.

I run down the street to IHOP that's where we normally meet up. I slow my pace from running to walking entering the restaurant, looking around no one. I scan the place again of course no one.

I check the time, reading 8:03 .Shit.

Chris's POV

We waited, 5 minutes going bye

"What's taking her so long" nick checked his time also looking for a message that said something along the lines of hey i wont be able to make it.

Then 15 minutes passing. I check my phone thinking she probably texted me and i didnt know it sense my phone's always on DND.

"C'mon , let's atleast get something to eat while we wait for her" i stated, making my way to a open table booth. We placed our order whenever the waitress came around.

Now what's taking her so long, I bet she's doing this cause she doesn't wanna see me wich shouldn't be the case cause whatever happened wasn't a big deal, really.

Our food was here, everyone including me seemed more interested if y/n was going to come or not but why should i car, even if she did come she probably wouldn't be able to look me in the eyes, stealing glances at me from across the table.Gosh. i could just see it now.

I text her

✨️Y/n ✨️

You gonna be able to make it?

Delivered 7:52

it is now 7:55, still no response. Half my food was gone there wasn't much talk going on between me, nick, and matt. Unless there was and i was just to zoned out to hear anything.

But i was right they weren't taking they were staring at there phone watching whatever was on there occasionally taking bites of there food.

"Im leaving" stating before getting up not waiting on an answer or a reply. From a distance i heard matt calling for the bill.

I was already walking to school, hands in my pocket i looked back hearing the footsteps of my two brothers. Then I turn back around and continue the walk.

"What's up with you" matt put his arm around my shoulder, walking at my pace.

"What do you mean?"

"Ever sense yesterday you've been acting weird, you haven't even said something that made me wanna smack you, yet."

He stated causing me to smirk thinking back to when (yesterday) how i got under Matt's skin about somthing so stupid.

" i don't know It's probably cause i haven't got much sleep". I shrug at my own reply

"Is this about y/n and the whole fight situation"

"no not everything is about her if she doesn't care why should I"

"Whatever you say cause i know what i see" he walks off dabbing up our friend nate and walking off with him and some of his friends

Today it hit me more then ever i didn't really have any other friend other then y/n.

she's who i walked to classes with even if we didn't have the same ones, who i did work with, who i stole snacks from. Theres so much we did together i didn't notice I'd miss until she wasn't with me.

Y/n's POV

I was late I checked my phone and i actually got a text from chris.

Chrissy>>

You gonna be able to make it?

Sent 7:52

Damn it i missed his text. Well that helps with absolutely nothing, the only thing it does is make me feel worse.

I tred my way home kicking rocks and leafs whenever i get the chance.

I make it home before opening the door i brace myself just incase my parents didnt leave for work yet and they ask me why I'm back so early.

I open the door to find no one i check Alexis room she was still sleep even with the light shining over her.

I lay on the couch cutting the tv flipping through the channels finding a show, nothing specific i just wanted background sounds so i don't feel alone.

________

It was 3:36 meaning it's after-school i get alexis dressed for dance class.

I put her in a black leotard, pink tutu, with her dance shoes to match and for the final touch white legwarmers.

"Come here" i squat down to her level to pick her up and walk over to my bathroom.

"What hairstyle do you want?" I ask looking at her through the mirror while she sits on the counter infront of me

"Poy tail" she pronounced pointing to her hair

"Ponytail it is"

I brush it up into a ponytail adding a bow

"You like it?"

She nods putting her fingers in her mouth standing on the counter practically painting the mirror with her spity hands.

"Ok no" i furrow my eyebrows at her taking her off the counter.

We both leave the house, i hold her hand walking to my school so I can meet up with nick, matt, and chris.

I hold alexis on my hip while we wait out front i spot them and approach them.

"Hey guys!" I called out behind them causing them to turn around, there eyes met with me and my sister.

"Oh my gosh" Matt squealed, his face lighting up as soon as he sees the little girl, on that note he takes her out of my arms. Nick gasps and starts playing with her aswell, leaving time for me to talk to chris.

I look over at him "hey umm.. i got you're message"

"Ok" he replied blankly.

What the fuck this kid can't be serious friendly reminder i got into a fight for him and this is the thanks i get an attitude.

HELLO!? lets not forget the part where i literally got suspended for the 6th time this year I believe. See i can't even keep count. I'd even get suspended again if it's for any one of them cause it's worth it.

Matt turns his attention away from the child

"He's been like that all day it's not just you" he blurts out.

"Well thats nice to know" rolling my eyes at the answer. Then i remember clearing my throat.

"Also guys im sorry that i couldn't make it to breakfast. my step-dad was literally trying to interrogate me before i left and-" nick stopped me from rambling making the apology longer then needed

"Its fine you are forgiven" he said chuckling a bit

"I have to go to the elementary school cause the children are gonna be playing soccor and i have to take photos for the yearbook. See you two at home, catch you later y/n"

"Wait nick can you take lexis she's supposed to be there for after school dance classes"

"Yea of course" he takes her out of Matt's arms and places her to the ground then walking off in the distance holding hands.

"That's my cue ig cause nate is supposed to be helping me in hockey" he says walking off and in the distance i see him dabbing up nate.

Leaving me and chris "wanna come over to my house?" I suggested

He shrugs

"I guess"

We make it back to my house i put the house keys in the little tray we have next to the door.

"Want anything to eat?"

I know if he wanted something he would have taken something but i wanted to start conversation so it could be less awkward.

"Sure, can i pick anything in specific?" He perks up

"How bout a grilled cheese?"

"Sounds good, tomato soup on the side"

"I can do that"

"In the sandwhich can there be only mozzarella cheese" he adds

"Ok now you're pushing it" i laugh shaking my head.

I walk in the kitchen to get started making the snack we both were talking about to fulfill the craving.

Chris follows in the kitchen after me.

"Hey, im gonna use the bathroom real quick"

I nod in response. DING. I heard DING i heard again

the phone went off again. It was chris's phone i checked who it was and it was paige. Why is paige texting him.

I check the message

Yea you can come to the-

I opend his phone to see the rest of the message before reading the rest, i sit my head up to look around, he was still in the bathroom.

Yeah you can come to the party so can you're brothers but that girl that can't and if i see her theres going to be a problem

That made me laugh a little cause last time i checked I beat her ass so what makes her think i can't do it again. I wouldn't want to cause i dont wanna seem violent, but if i need to put a bitch in her place again then i will.

I decided to read more messages between them

Paige

What happend!?

(Seen) Delivered 12:37

You're girlfriend beat me up

(Seen) sent 1:55

She's not my girlfriend

Why did she dot it paige?

(Seen) delivered 1:55

I don't know?

Ask her not me now stop texting me🙄

She might fight me again

and again ask her yourself

(Seen) delivered 1:56

You lied.

You got beat for talking shit.

(Seen) delivered 4:26

So? Even if told the truth

It doesnt matter

(Seen) delivered 4:29

Call me

Ouch..

call me was the last thing i read before putting the phone down i looked around again and there he was leaning against the doorframe of the kitchen he was watching me read the text messages.

"Listen i kn-" i cut him off

"NO, dont talk don't say anything just go"

please don't go i really don't want him to go, i wanted him to explain everything to me and tell me that whatever i saw was a misunderstanding gosh i just don't want them to be together i like him too much, texting alone makes my heart sink to my stomach.

we weren't dating but this hurt it felt like betrayal, Probably cause that's what it was.

"Im trying to tell you those messages were right when i found out who was in the fight and i wanted answers"

"THEN WHY COULDN'T YOU TEXT ME"

"Stop yelling thats unnecessary"

"It's not like we're together anyway"

"Fuck you" tears welled up in my eyes. Down my cheek the tears rolled i wipe them away quickly.

"I GOT SUSPENDED fighting for you. The other two times i got suspended was me fighting for either you, matt, or nick because i dont care enough about myself to fight someone if they were talking about me."

I let out a breath then sniffling

"What did you guys talk about on the phone"

"What?"

"Chris i want to know what yall talked about, you texted her call me, so what did you guys talk about"

"I just got to know her and she talked about her birthday party that's happening next week"

"Was this or was this not the same day everything happened" he hesitated before replying.

"It was" he muttered staring down,picking at his nails.

I sob rubbing the tears out my eyes with my arms i just wanted to be alone.

"Leave.. cause- what i do for you is obviously not enough"

He picked his head up "no y/n it's not like that at all ple-"

"Shh stop talking" heaving sobs escape my mouth i wanted to hide my face i didn't want him to see me cry but who am i to stop my body from doing so.

I was crying because....

I don't actually know why. But what he did really hurt me and it's not fair cause paige always gets her way.

"Y/n please-" he begs

I start pushing him to the door and opening it for him

"SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU PUT YOURSELF IN THIS POSITION"

"Please, please just let me explain" i look at him he looks like he shes a few years himself he was also actively begging.

I stand in the doorway with my arms crossed thinking for a minute.

"Fine.." i say feeling defeated

A/n - hope you enjoyed part two i tried my best. And yes i was gonna make it into a mini little series but then i didn't think anyone would be interested but i was wrong. Also sorry if this is a bit dramatic and not on topic of the og plot I'm trying bare with me.

[bbrissonn]

Thinking about best friends to lovers with Briss bc he’s to scared to tell you and then some guy hits on you and he’s like nope

under the cut!

warnings: i didn’t do exactly like the request, but kept the best friends to lovers

"what do you mean you’re not coming? you always come to my home games, y/n/n, it’s a tradition!” brendan’s voice echoed from your phone, making you roll your eyes at how dramatic he was being. 

“i have something--” 

“but you’ve never missed one of my home games, y/n/n. not one in since we were 9...” he said, you could hear how hurt and sad he sounded, but you had promised the guy you were seeing you’d go on a date with him this friday, without realizing that bren had a game that day. 

“i’m sorry, b. but i promised him--” 

“him? who’s him?” 

“the guy i’m seeing...” you trailed off, you never really talked about your romantic life to brendan until you were sure that it was going to go somewhere with the person.

“oh.” 

“yeah.” 

“well, uh, it’s getting pretty late, so um, im gonna go to bed. bye, y/n.” he quickly said, hanging up the phone before you could even open your mouth to answer him making your brows fur in confusion. it was only 9:45, and you knew the earliest brendan had gone to be in last 5 years was 11:30 so there was definitely something wrong with me.

~

“why have you been ignoring me?” you asked the boy as you walked into his room friday afternoon. his back was on his bed and his legs were up against the wall,  his phone in his hands. 

“i haven’t--” 

“bullshit!” you cut him off sternly, making him drop his phone and sit down properly on his bed. 

“it’s not bullshit--” 

“yes it is! you haven’t talked to me since monday night, i texted you a million time and you either don’t open them or you leave me on read. you missed our weekly study session. so don’t even try to say that you haven’t been ignoring me, brendan.” you reasoned him, he let out a sigh before his eyes finally looked at yours.

“why does it matter, y/n? you have a boyfriend now or whatever, and clearly spending time with him is more important to you then seeing me--” 

“he’s not my boyfriend. ben and i--” 

“oh he has a name now.”

“is this what this is about? you’re pissed that i’m seeing someone and for once in the past i don’t know how many years i’m putting my own life before yours?” 

“no, it’s not--” 

“then what is it about, bren? just talk to me, please.” you begged as you sat down next to him on the bed. 

“i-- it’s just, why him? w-why not me? what does he have that i don’t? i-i mean, i take care of you when you get drunk, i always walk you home when it’s dark outside, i walk you to and from class, i buy you coffee everyday, i carry your bag everyday, i just don’t understand why you’ve never given me a chance, y/n/n.” he whispered, his elbows leaning on his knees as his head rested in his hands. 

“you’ve never asked me out, bren. how was i supposed to know you felt like this--” 

“i hold your hand everywhere, i always put my arm around your shoulder, i compliment you every time i see you, i kiss your cheek way too close to your mouth for it to just be an innocent ‘best friend’ kiss, and all of the things i said before. i don’t do those things for other people, y/n/n, i only do them with you. all of the guys can tell i love you, everyone back home do too, so i don’t understand how you can’t tell, y/n.” he admitted, and your whole body froze once the words ‘i love you’ came out of his mouth.

“bren, i-i’m sorry--” 

“you don’t feel the same, blah blah blah. it’s fine, y/n. we can just pretend this never happened and you can go on that date with ben.” 

“that’s not what i was gonna say, idiot. i’m sorry i didn’t realize. i mean , like yeah sometimes i felt like what you did meant more than just friendship, but i didn’t want to look into it too much so i didn’t make a fool of myself." you said softly, making him finally look at you. his eyes were a bit glossy, which made your heart ache.

"the fuck is that supposed to mean, y/n?" he asked, you could tell he was a bit angry that you hadn't told him if you felt the same way or not yet, which made you roll your eyes a bit.

"i love you too, dumbass. i have for years, i literally kissed you when we were 12, bren."

"you-- you're being serious right now? 'cause if this is some sick joke, i'm never talking to you again of my life, y/n."

"i'm dead serious, bren."

"then why'd you date those other guys?"

"you never asked me out..." you said with a shurg, making him laugh a bit you weren't totally wrong there.

"after the game, i wanna take you out, if that's okay with you."

"yeah, that's okay with me. and just letting you know, i cancelled my date with ben monday night, told him we wouldn't work out."

"good."

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