#and i wanna say 'no i liked that when i was 6 ive grown up' but the problem is that would be a Bonafide Lie

[stealingpotatoes]

Hi there I just had to say that your art is seriously my serotonin source any time it pops on my feed. Your takes are so fun and heartfelt, thank you for your art!

aww thank you wah!! call me a drug dealer cause-- actually dont do that i can't get in trouble w the police again

[badgyalshii]

ITS NEVER OVER | II

Paul Atreides x Reader (always safe for POCS+ Plus size)

2.6k word count

warnings! idk really you tell me lmao. just sad really, flashbacks, etc. proofread, uhhh most of it.

A/N: im so happy i got the results that I did in the first part, im thinking of starting a taglist for this series maybe so just send me an ask saying you wanna be in there and i gotchuuuu! thank you to everyone who reads my stories, i was supposed to post this yesterday but i was pretty busy. i am overall happy with how this series is going! i was gonna leave it simple and end it here, but honestly i feel like i could keep going with this, love you guysss!😘

Access Part I here. I . II . III . IV .

¨its just protocol¨ ¨it wasnt necessary, i watched. Ive watched you, standing behind you. Who are you, paul?¨

¨y/n? Helloooo, y/n¨ chani waved her hand in your face as the memory slowly faded and you came back to your vision and seeing chani infront of you. You both laid on the small bed, hot when the sun was up or down. Chani wanted more, she swore she did. When she wasnt talking to you she was searching for something to make this ¨house¨ feel comforting, like a home. You closed your eyes as the flashback completely faded in your head. You both were laying down, she was across from you with a worried look on her face as you blinked. ¨yes chani?¨ ¨are you prepared?¨ she asked. You struggled to remember what she was talking about, and her concerned look never left her face. ¨To leave¨ chani whispers gently. She knew you still had feelings for paul, and she couldnt fight to win you over in your constant mental battle. You never felt like this before. Wanting only one person- no, needing them. Under your eyes grew heavier and heavier. Days grew longer and you hardly slept and when you did it was of paul, had you have no life of your own? Have you grown depressed? You sighed, stood and you dressed, taking a deep breath in as you pulled up your pants and grabbed your mask.

Its been 6 years, 6 years on arrakis with chani, and you never forgot. You never forgot the life that you used to have, the life you missed so deprately, and you never came to terms with your new life, even if it was with chani. You missed stilgar, you missed everyone, grouped together, eating, small laughs between you and your friends, paul picking at your plate whenever you didnt really feel like finishing your food. You loved chani, you love her, youve became closer and closer like sisters. She taught you her own individual skills that shes learned along the way, but you guys barely talked. Her company was comforting, but all you really thought about was paul, and his new marriage, and his new wife. Was it just…..protocol? You could tell when you spoke to chani that she was extremely uninterested in the topic of paul, but thats all you ever thought about.

You found another place in arrakis, it took about 6 sandworms to get to your destination and you lived in once again, another large rock. You and chani hunted for water and when you found it you both started to make another ¨tent¨ in the rock to live at for a while. You both sat down and ate.

¨whats on your mind?¨ chani asked worryingly, she worried, she worried so often. She only wanted whats best for you and it hurt to see you this way but she covered it with her toughness. ¨paul. Maybe he was right-¨ ¨y/n, it has been six years since then. Please-¨

¨maybe… i should go¨ you thickly swallowed, looking at your hands before you looked back up at her. Her jaw was clenched before she released it, she has an irritated look on her face before she released her eyebrows. ¨im coming with you”

As you got dressed to go back to him, you thought of him. Maybe it was because of the way he laughed so softly against your lips that made you miss him. Maybe its because of how his warm and rough fingers softly grazed your face and on your body sending butterflies in your stomach and tiny shocks wherever his loving touch landed, eager to touch you, the way his green but now electric blue eyes looked at you with pure admiration. He was so perfect. Everything you wouldbe thought you wanted on paper was right infront of you, waiting on you. You couldnt lie, you were excited to see him and thankful chani allowed you to go back. You wondered about him, wondered how he looked now, was he more mature? Did his voice get deeper? was it just protocol? Did you make a mistake? Is he safe? Is he still there? Does he still love you?

Anxiety crept through your throat before you swallowed it back down. Chani was already ready to go as soon as she shes going with you. You looked at her, she was sitting outside of the giant rock, waiting for you and if she wasnt already so smart, she turned feeling eyes on her back almost as if she could sense you, one eyebrow raised as she then crossed her arms and leaned on her left foot. You sighed before picking up your things, walking up to chani she put her hand on your shoulder and patted it. ¨can we just sit here? we just got here! look at the view¨ she said before crossing her arms again and looking at you with a smile.

The view was clearly beautiful. The sun coming down as it usually does but in this particular rock, there was something different about the scenery. ¨pretty cool for a shit planet¨ you muttered, dropping your things before you got down and sat criss cross. Chani joined you, enjoyed the view for a little longer before she looked over at you.

¨why do you like him so much, Paul?¨ she questioned kindly, usually she didnt like talking about him, she was never a fan. You looked at her, studying her face you could see she had a serious face beside her eye slightly winched from the sun, she waiting on your answer before she lifting her knee and laid on her elbow. you sighed before sitting with your legs flat out with your hands in your lap, it wasnt a hard question, it just caught you off guard. Why were you so attracted to him? . ¨i….i dont know, actually¨ you looked back into the view, chewing on the side of your cheek before continuing. ¨its not everyday you get a new comer who is so emotionally strong but you could see he is so lost in those gorgeous eyes. Someone so intelligent, beautiful, kind, and wise. Who wants to learn and is¨ you did an exaggerated sigh before raising your fingers to quote ¨so humble, as stilgar says¨ chani laughs before laying flat out. ¨he was new, wasnt like us. us growing up, we were used to the same routine, everyone around everyone. So when he got here, when he wanted me.. I just…felt…different. Everything felt different¨ a small smile played on your face as you thought of him.

“ever thought of kids?” paul asked, playing with your hair. “why are you thinking of kids in your current situation, paul? wouldnt that be too much?” you reply, your arm laid across him and your head in his chest. he chuckled in return, you felt his heartbeat skip and pitter patter before you felt the vibrations from his voice, “i wouldnt wanna have a kid unless its yours, y/n” and with that you smiled and looked up at him, pressing a kiss to his lips before he wrapped his arms around your waist to flip you guys over, you both chuckled before paul pulled up the sheets.

You wanted to feel his warm embrace again. You wanted him again. ¨i had a vision- well a dream that one day, he would be ruler. Be so wise and so gentle, which he already is. But i would be at his side, carrying his kids. Happy family. Getting to see his eyes… looking into him and only seeing love, i wouldnt ever grow tired of it. Y/N atredies, queen of atredies, me and him. You and stilgar, everyone around each other. Happy family, happy life. Of course war, but-¨ you cut yourself off, ¨i just want love, ever since i experieced it with him, its hard to let go. He teached me genuine love, nothing less, nothing more. The way he was so honest. How could i ever let that go?¨ you questioned, a puzzled look on your face as you waited on chani to answer. She took a pause, she once again looked back at the view before looking at you.

¨you do understand that he isnt the same anymore, right?¨”she said, looking up. ¨i understand,¨ you nodded, ¨ and i saw it, when he said he was waiting for me. He changed when he drunk the water of life. I dont think he really… values relationships anymore. I remember, i remember before he drunk the water, way before. He would tell me about these nightmares he had and how he was going to do everything to stop it¨ you pursed your lips to the side, as the conversation flowed, your confidence in your relationship was going lower and lower. As much as you didnt want to hear it, you needed to. ¨he lost himself, y/n¨ chani says. ¨are you sure when you walk back into his life hes gonna be the same old paul?¨

You bit your lip before looking down at your hands and let out a breath, ¨thats what were going to find out, right?¨ ¨to be honest,¨ chani sighed and put her hands behind he head, looking at the ceiling of the rock. ¨ i dont really trust him, never did. nor do i like him. He took advantage of us y/n. Tricked us, making us fight for him¨ chani said without filter. ¨he is the preacher, its written. I believe in him¨ you said pridefully, showing humility as you will always stand behind your one true love. ¨you got your sight taken by the vision of love¨ chani looks at you, she felt bad that you were so blind. But you were often like this, always have been. Soft, sensitive, caring. Its true, you and muad´dib are perfect for each other, chani could see that, but you honestly didnt wanna talk about it if she wasnt even gonna try to understand. ¨white savior¨ she finishes and looks up at the ceiling of the rock again before she looks back into the distance. ¨i love him¨ that was your finishing statement.

It was as if nothing faded, like you didnt grow, like you saw paul yesterday, like you never left. Chani felt so bad, so bad that you kept searching for paul in sleepless nights. But she also felt slightly angry, as if she didnt take you under her wing and teach you something brand new, a new way of life. It was like you totally discarded it, like you didnt want it, you didnt want to. Paul or nothing. Did you not value chanis friendship? Her love? She would never ask, shes too dominate for that. But it bothered her.

¨we should leave before it gets too late¨ chani mutters, letting out a slight groan before she stood and wiped her hands off on the pockets of her pants. You followed suit and picked up your bag before something dropped. It was pauls necklace, a family heirloom he trusted you with, he wanted you to have it. You looked at it before picking it up, rubbing over it and placing it over your neck before following chani.

The sand crunched against your shoes as you followed her, she was silent as she held the tools to get a sandworm. It was offly hot today and you both lacked water so she viewed it at that point, she already discussed with you that she wasnt gonna work for muad´dib, wasnt gonna fight for him, only gonna fight for her people. You looked at her, the sweatbeads on her forehead visible but it didnt make her look bad. You sat while you waited for the sandworm to appear.

When you arrived the foundation looked huge, guards around the premises dressed in black, all tall, muscular, and you could easily tell they were worthy of their place. ¨follow me¨ chani said, her walk bold and strong as you followed behind her in suit. Chani walked up the the guard and the guard had a strong bold look. ¨who are you?¨ the guard asked. ¨chani¨ she replied, taking off the mask that covered her eyes. ¨freman¨ he muttered, he looked over chanis shoulder and saw you. ¨and you?¨ he questioned, ¨freman¨ you replied. He stepped aside and allowed you both to enter. Chani pushed the door open, coming inside and you followed.

You werent used to this, spending all your life living in a rock. The walls were long and you looked at them, wanting to touch them, study the whole place. But there was something else you wanted to see to, the love of your life. ¨y/n, im gonna try to find stilgar. Be safe¨ chani whispered to you. ¨chani, this is home. Everyone we know is here, this is family¨ you said with a smile on your face. ¨its been six years. Foundations couldve changed, family couldve changed. Who knows what paul did, y/n¨ she said stern. You nodded your heard and she did too, leaving you off to find the one you wanted to see do desperately.

You walked, the building was so silent that you could hear your own footsteps, sand fell off your shoes as you walked, leaving a trail. A smile played on your lips as you walked throught the halls, checking every door, seeing your people. You asked them, ¨wheres paul?¨ in return they smiled, ¨not so sure. I dont even know where his room is at. Maybe check the throne room. Honestly, i havent seen him in a long time, y/n¨ and you did, no one was there. You furrowed your eyebrows and continued to look through the rooms, paul just wasnt there. Your happiness sooned turn into sadness and insecurity. Tears were on the edge of brimming your eyes. You exiteded the castle and sat down, leaning against the wall. You held your knees up to your chest and put your head on your forearms.

Where is he? Wheres chani? This is his place he cant be impossible to find, can he? Why cant i find him? Wheres his wife? All these thoughts coursed through your head as you waited, you ended up falling asleep, outside.

¨y/n?¨ you heard. Your neck had a crane as you looked up. ¨y/n!¨ it was a voice you recognized, ¨why are you outside?¨ they laughed, you finally looked up after rubbing your eyes and it was stilgar. ¨stilgar!¨ you yelled, he came down to your level and hugged you. He laughed ¨look at you, all dirty¨ he wiped your face. ¨wheres paul?¨ you questioned, his smile dropped and his eyebrows furrowed. This took you aback, ¨wheres paul? I was gonna ask you that¨ he mutters, wiping the dirt off of your cheek. You dropped his hand and looked at him with desperate eyes, ¨what-what do you mean?¨ you asked, desperate for an answer. ¨paul left 2 years ago, y/n. He said when he came back, he would come back with you¨” stilgar looks down as he reveals, you stood, paced, questioned. ¨he said he would wait for me- i….i dont understand! Stilgar¨ you let out a whine, trying to fight the tears. ¨where is he? Stilgar please, please!¨ you begged, dropping to your knees. Stilgar couldnt muster to come up with anything to say. In honesty, he mightve been more sad than you. The messiah is gone, lost. No where to be found. How could he find him? Where could he possibly be? Two years. Two. this was like heartbreak all over again. Before, you knew he was alive, but now. You know nothing. Should you go back? Is he still searching for you?

[youremyheaven]

this is gunna sound so weird... men make my skin crawl. Like im attracted to men but everytime i see a man, my rbf awakens and i become hyper aware of my surroundings 😭

it doesn't help that im attending an all girls college now... any advice on how to ease up pls around them? I find it hard to even want to talk to them 😭 ik all men aren't bad and i may always not be in danger (imagine that in all caps and red) but i just wanna be able behave and think like a normal person around them ( this is so much that i even can't stand strangers)

Loads of luv to you ❤

honestly i hope u meet better men!!! there are some disgusting nasty perverted pieces of shit out there who dont deserve to be around women and i completely get why u would feel repulsed by them.

i wonder if u have malefic influence, they usually struggle the most with the opposite gender

tips on how to ease up around men:

think in terms of energy. dont project anger or hatred because thats what you will see in return. i know this is very triggering and difficult for many people but you HAVE to believe in good to SEE good. despite absolutely everything that ive gone thru, i still believe that people are inherently good, kind and helpful and i see proof of it everyday.

ive had men treat me with dignity, respect and kindness in the shadiest of circumstances and ive had men be nasty to me out in the open, so it just comes down to character. just think of men as people honestly and not as hound dogs about to attack u.

2. imagine them as little boys

sometimes when men are soft or boyish with me, it reminds me of how they mustve been as kids and it warms me. i have two little boy cousins who are 12 and 6 respectively and they both adooooreeee me and want to marry me when they grow up🥺🥺🥺theyre the sweetest kids on the planet and i could never ever feel otherwise, theyre my babies. idk if this is something u can relate to but think of a little boy you're close to, how innocent and silly he is and how you could never see him as a threat or hate him and understand that grown men can be like that too.

3. how we treat people has a lot to do with how people treat us

if you have a rbf and generally act standoffish and cold/distant, then you're probably perceived as being bitchy 😬😬and nevermind men, even women probably find u intimidating or hard to approach. im only saying this because learning how to navigate social situations is 90% of adulthood and the key to personal and professional success.

learn to smile more. i know women hate being told to smile but honestly we should alllll smile more. force yourself to do it until it becomes a habit. be that person who smiles at strangers. dont u feel happy when someone smiles at you??? so in turn, be that person to others!!! <33

learn to get out of your head. most people think too much. i hate spending time with people who talk about everything from a victim pov. like yes sure u/we women, are in a position of disadvantage in many ways, historically speaking but ???? this attitude?? wont get u anywhere. (I'm speaking generally and not about you particularly)

i would say the key is to turn inward and work on yourself. read all those cliche self help books about "how to influence people" yada yada,, learn social etiquette and watch all those youtube gurus who teach soft skills. forget about men and hating them for a second and just focus on self improvement. as you change, youll see the world change with u.

just think of men as people basically. also idk if youre familiar with carl jung but i feel like you have a wounded animus. many women who grew up with an absent (emotionally or otherwise) father grow up to project all that onto men. and in turn have damaging relationships with men!!

im not a man defender and im in no way saying all men are good but i genuinely dont think its healthy to hate, thats all!!

idk if any of this is helpful sikeee but lmk if u have any updates

also lots of love to u too angel!!<3

[somefuckingguysblog]

rating how fuckable the men in God of War are (as a dilf lover and also a queer gay man)

1. Kratos, 10/10. I love big beefy men. What else can i say. For reasons i cannot express, he seems like a switch who prefers to bottom. Not that'd he'll tell anyone that.

2. Thor, 9/10. Again, I love big men. Points taken off for the alcoholism, but dudes trying. I'll get him therapy bc he needs it.

3. Týr, 10/10. Silly little man. Hes so skrunkly skrimblo. Also the imitial scene where he stands up compleatly and overshadows Kratos does things to me. I more wanna be friends with him and smoke that zaza of asgard but im giving him a 10/10 as compenation for forgetting him when i initially made this post.

4. Sindri, 10/10. I love him so fucking much i cannot even begin to explain it. He'd proabbly be very sweet but shy, hes not very experienced. Bfok has more expereince than him. Also, praise kink.

5. Brok, 9/10. Again, i cannot beguin to explain how much i love him. However, im taking points off just because while i do love him, i like Sindri way more. Also, if i had a dime for everytime ive liked a blue, short, crude older brother type, i'd have two dimes. which isnt alot, but itd weird that it happened twice right? (/ref) But he'd proabbly be suprisingly gentle, and prefer to bottom. Though hes not used ot it, he dosent mind being taken care of and probably has alot of body image issues,

6. Freyr, 7/10. I personally wouldn't fuck him, but i can see the appeal. Just not my kinda guy.

7. Mimir, 8/10. Man can GET IT. He knows how to please both men and women, and hes exceptional at giving head. (see what i did there lol) Points taken off for being only a head.

8. Heimdall, 0/10. I hate Heimdall with a passion, and i want to curb stomp his head in. Bro is lirerally a grown ass man and he picked a fight with a 16 year old child. Fuck off. Heimdall lovers dni./j

9. Baldur, 6/10. I contimplated putting him here, but i decided to because why not. I can see the appeal, and while i do love crazy men, hes a bit too crazy for my liking. Yall continue to slay.

10. Odin, 0/10. Self explanitory. I like old men, but not asshole manipulatirs. I also want to curb stoml his head in, but in a way thats already been done for me. (thanks Sindri <3)

[swaglet]

One of the things that keeps me deep in ed is the fact that i hate having a "feminine body" I HATEEEEE having curves liek fucking hate it.

And the problem is no amount of weight loss will change the structure of my body so unfortunately I have to try to keep myself at a low weight to appear as if I have less curves.

Idk if you watched euphoria but rue (character played by zendaya) has my dream body she's so tall, skinny, "flat" like she looks "boyish" (i swear im not a creep 😭) and I so wanna look like that every time I wear something and see my curves pop out I wanna take a seesaw and just fucking remove them.

Whenever I discuss this w my friends they either tell me I'm humble bragging or they try to tell me that I'm non binary or some bullshit.

Like I jsut wanna have a slender body. Curves to me jsut make me look trashy and too "sexed up" I wanna look like a stick with no shape ffs

under a cut cos its kinda triggering material obvs and im yapping

oh nonnie this is exactly what kept me sick for so long too i'm so sorry to hear this is what you're going through as well :'( my mind always felt at ease when people told me i looked more like a little boy than a grown woman for reasons i'm sure we all have experienced at one time or another (COUGH misogyny and harassment and sexualization and objectification and and and)

i'm actually dealing with the fallout of it rn and it still messes with me mentally... 6 months ago i started birth control to stop my periods entirely to manage my pmdd and the excessive amount of blood i was losing during every period, and while my weight itself hasn't drastically changed at all (it stays within 5 pounds maintenance thanks to the lifting and protein usually i think), any of the body fat i DID has redistributed to make me even curvier than i was before. my boobs and ass are prominent parts of my figure now like they got HUGE compared to how they used to be (FLAT) and i have a small amount of new stretch marks on the inside of my thighs which means they must have gotten meatier and that checks out because a lot of my pantlegs and shorts feel tighter. literally because of that i almost relapsed so many times in the past 6 months but ive had the mental fortitude to just ignore the urge

what has helped me a lot is that, as i have gotten close to the people in my life that are related to my accomplishments that i am proud of (a lot of it having to do with college and my local music scene) and have become comfortable with opening up to them about feeling the way i do, almost all the women in my life have shared that they relate at least a little bit, but that my appearance and certainly not my weight or amount of curves i have don't bear any weight (pun intended) on determining how much they respect me, how talented they think i am, how good they think i am at my job/the things i do, how willing they are to work with me, and stuff like that. many of them have also offered me the advice that we only get one body, and there's only so much you can do to alter the natural shape of your body, and then within those limits there's only so much you can do that's healthy and won't disable you or damage your organs for the rest of your life, and it's unfortunate that men have made our bodies out to be this sexed object but we do really only have one shot at life and ultimately i think it's pointless trying to meticulously control how everyone around us perceives us. to be honest i have felt a lot better about it since i have been making less and less men as friends and making more women friends.

i want to say that curves, or any body shape, aren't trashy or too sexed up, they're just neutral forms that your body takes. you have little to no control over how your genetics and environment shape your bones and distribute your fat patterns aside from exercising in a way that keeps your body working and eating a nutritious diet to fuel you, so the shape of your body literally cannot have like. moral implications like trashy or slutty or sexed up or anything. i repeat that to myself when i look in the mirror every morning. my body is completely neutral no matter how it looks; my body is not the vessel that i, a formless brain, pilot around in the real world; my body is not a physical representation of me.. my body is just part of me, i am my body, my body is me, and anything my body looks like is how i look and that's how life is. i don't have to like how i look, i am allowed to be uncomfortable with it, but nothing is wrong with my body unless something physiologically about me is unwell (ex. joint pain, something is swollen or red, a medical issue basically) or is making me sick or unable to function. if it's something i can't control and can't change drastically without surgery or severely under- or overeating, like my boob size, butt size, thigh gap size, the shape of how my bones fit together and how my muscles and fat lays on top of the bones, then i just do the stupid therapy thing where instead of thinking negative thoughts i think a different thought and don't let myself ruminate on the negative ones i'm fixated on. for example, "my strong healthy non-starved body lets me play my trumpet very loudly and march strongly with force; underneath my gigantic ribcage is a gigantic set of lungs" or "my strong healthy non-starved body lets me go on bug hunts often without getting as tired and weak and needing to stop because now it's full of food that fuels me all day long and i eat like a cavewoman who was built to endurance hunt and gather trinkets all day" and one that i'm sure not many can relate to is "my healthy body lets me sweat now so i don't overheat and although sweating may be unpleasant and very uncomfortable it lets me know i'm alive and that my body is working correctly" and then i try my best to move on with my day

another thing i do is i pay A LOT of attention to the women around me who i look up to and respect; what do they look like? do i ever notice their weight or their curves and feel negatively towards them and have diminished respect towards them or feel disdain towards them? or do i feel a kinship with them if i do ever happen to notice, like "oh she is like me in that regard"? there has never been an instance where i have felt negatively about a woman in my life or lost any respect for her because of her shape, curves or no curves. i'm much more concerned about other things tbh, especially as i get older. idk how old you are nonnie, but in my experience it's very easy to be "boyish" anorexic when you're in your teens and like at the oldest 19 years old... even without synthetic female hormones (birth control) being added to my body, and even with a hormonal imbalance, at about 21 i started rly "growing up" and that's when i got hips and a little bit bigger boobs (still A cups nonetheless) and put on a bit of a belly pooch even when i was still way too underweight. those are just parts of a woman that exist on our bodies naturally and there isn't any judgement to be ascribed to them. every professor, every janitor, every coach, every grown 21+ student walking around my campus (and town!) looks like that regardless of what shape or size we come in. naturally underweight, naturally overweight, neither, curvy, blocky, straight as a board/fridge, regardless of what shape that's just how women are shaped i think. i wouldn't ever judge another woman for looking the way i look, i wouldn't judge another woman for her shape Ever, regardless of what i think her circumstances are, so by that logic i ought to apply that to myself.

another thing that brings me comfort, and you may not believe me with this one but im serious; nobody notices all the things you notice about yourself anywhere NEAR as much as you do. ppl who have known me for 4 years think im 120 pounds (i am 30 pounds heavier than that and they are always in disbelief when i tell them that) and always have no idea i have a small potbelly until i lift my shirt and show them. it's like one of my biggest insecurities in the world and literally no one knows or cares which is insane to me. if i ever get sad about it i tell myself that's where i keep my ovarian cyst at + all my air for when i sing/play instruments and it will go away with time as i get more gains and start eating right again

and nonny!!!!! "slender/stick with no shape" is still just as much of a shape as "feminine/curvy" ! male is not the default no matter how much society wants u to believe that i promise......... there is nothing wrong with the way women's bodies are this is how we have existed naturally for thousands of years since we first got here. our bodies are just as neutral as men's bodies are. it took me a long long time to feel this way about myself and about my body and about the human body in general and recovery is never linear, my outlook changes every day and i have good days and bad days and some days i absolutely just will not go outside because i don't want anyone to look at me. but those have been far and few between lately

i love u very much anon. food definitely tastes better than how skinny feels. living life freely feels better than looking perfectly skinny in an aesthetic outfit. aesthetic outfits are for 1 day. aesthetic outfits and a skinny slender form will be in pictures and they will only last in the pictures. i don't want to scare you but you will either die like that (very slowly) or you will get very unwell and realize you have to choose recovery and you will have to gain it all back slowly and you will have to choose yourself everyday. idk. i put myself through so much agony that i didn't have to go through and looking back on those pictures im thinking in my head. what was all that for? i felt better then but it's so scary to me now. i looked so sick it makes me so sad for little me. i wish she could have lived a life where she wasn't preoccupied with being perceived as a sex object and could have lived free like i do now. BUT WE THRIVE. I BELIEVE IN YOU NONNIE I LOVE YOU VERY MUCH

[17gz]

do you mind me asking what just happened w you guys’ roommate? of course lmk if youd rather not talk about it, i just didnt wanna ask about the situation through replies and thought itd be better to ask here in case youd wanna answer privately 🙁 regardless i hope you two are okay

tldr:

a friend i've known for 6 years + the two of us moved into this apartment last summer

i'd lived w this friend a few years before this and i thought they'd grown and worked on shit (boy was i wrong)

things were okay in the first half of our lease, minor problems but it seemed like we had a good foundation laid out for living together and we had plans to renew when this current lease ended

abt 4 months ago, my roommate met this person off a dating app and they basically immediately got together and their partner showed up one day and never left

even after trying to put boundaries down abt this, they didnt listen to any of it

i also don't trust their partner bc everyone thats met them has caught some of their lies. their entire story doesnt check out

the partner (on the day our friend found recent texts on their phone to their ex) got evicted from their old place bc they couldnt pay rent and they kinda cornered us and "asked" if their partner could live with us (not paying any rent btw) and we had rly no choice but to say yes

on top of that, their partner has been fatphobic and shitty and disrespectful to us on a near daily basis. nobody in my friends life likes this partner, not their parents or any of their friends, and especially us. i tried talking to my friend about this and they acted like they took it seriously but clearly didn't...

shit kept building after they were making us feel uncomfortable and intrusive in our own apartment for 4 months, and initially i said we could renew the lease since $875 rent per person sounded tempting + i found this unit + i like this unit + i hate moving, but it just really wasnt a good idea

the final straw was my friends partner being extremely rude and disrespectful to my high school friend during pride (my hs friend is a trans woman) and when we talked to them about it, they denied everything and deflected so fucking hard, we were completely fed up with it and realized that 4 months of this has been hell and i can't do another 12 months of this

last tuesday, we told them that we would not be renewing our lease, which ends july 30. we apologized about the late notice, and explained our side and tried to be as sympathetic and helpful as possible abt them renewing the lease with other roommates, but they were upset and i get being upset, so i was giving them some space etc

we made our conversation as mature and non aggressive as possible, ive been trying to stay as collected and polite as physically possible, especially since we are the only two men in this unit

they started being extremely passive aggressive and rude and awful to us throughout the past week, and even when i was helping them figure shit out with our landlord etc, they were still so rude to us... i mean slamming doors and stomping their feet and rolling their eyes when we walk past and deadbolting the door when we leave the apartment etc

after so much hostility etc in this unit, we stayed with mutual friends for the weekend and we told them abt everything and they were all extremely supportive and said we were not at all in the wrong for this, and that we have been extremely patient with them for so long. even a friend i didnt expect to side with us was 100% on our side and wants to talk to them one on one

we're in the process of applying for a new unit and fingers crossed we can move out asap. we started properly packing today, and during that, our friend asked to talk to us

they asked what we left out of our convo and what personal issues we had, i said i'm not comfortable talking about that until we're in our separate apartments and things have cooled down more. they were really mad that i was firm on that, they accused us of creating the tension and hostility in the apartment, despite the fact that we have actively been avoiding causing shit because our stress levels are through the roof and they're already demonizing us to others bc we put down a boundary, i can't be petty etc and give them an actual reason to demonize us.

as we kept talking, they were like. shaking with rage with a smile on their face and saying passive aggressive shit to us and saying we need to move out sooner than our planned move out date...

important context: my dad is the guarantor, i found this unit, and 99% of the furniture etc we have here is ours.

(disclaimer before i say this, i know various people with BPD. people that will take accountability for their actions and take steps to work on their coping mechanisms and behavior etc.) but this "friend" has BPD that they use as an excuse for every single one of their shitty actions and does not take any responsibility for their behavior. their partner, as far as i know, is not diagnosed with anything and while i'm no psychiatrist, i've had 3 diff people (including my actual psychiatrist) say this is telltale NPD. again not to say that makes you a terrible person, but when you don't take any steps to work on yourself etc and harm others around you, thats what i take issue with. its the definition of a volatile BPD + NPD relationship...

ive also been there for this friend more times than i can count. i've wiped so much snot and tears from their face, i've put aside my own shit to help them and i've done so much for them. thats rarely been reciprocated... they do not give a shit about us and it completely showed today when they talked to us and it became clear they were trying to financially trap us here and they're furious that we put a boundary down. they treat us like their parents, their therapists, and their savings account, and if we EVER did something like that to them, the fallout would be nuclear.

i'm literally shaking typing this and hearing them come out of their room slamming doors and shit. i don't know what they're capable of, and i don't know if they're planning on doing anything, but im afraid because i don't know. i've been having nonstop panic attacks recently and the living situation here is adding immense stress on top of the apt hunting process and moving process. i feel fucking sick genuinely

i'm sure i've left a LOT out, but its been nightmarish here

[gracie-has-a-sticker]

tips for wonyoungism

Who is wonyoung?⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩 .𖥔˚

 Following Well many would question, who exactly is wonyoung? This question may come from many non-kpop fans and even new kpop fans! Wonyoung as of 2024 is part of a group called IVE under starship ent She is also a ex-member of Iz*one, just to clear the air she did not leave the group due to any personal problems but the group as a whole disband!

Wonyoung has had the kpop fans and the internet on a chokehold because of

1; her absolutely insane beauty

2; charismatic personality

3; talented performance

4; a fashion, brand and, skincare icon

5; always determined attitude

6; a unbothered queen

7; most recently, the legal battle

8; THE IT GIRL OF 4TH GEN

In summary, Jang Won Young's charisma, fashion sense, and resilience has contributed to her viral status in South Korea's entertainment scene✧˚ ༘ ⋆｡˚ and in this book, we will be going in dept to talk about her her viral wonyoungism mindset!

reminders about wonyoungism⋆｡‧˚ʚɞ˚‧｡⋆

I just want to let you know that before we jump into this whole wonyoungism mindset, I just wanna let you know you are beautiful the way you are!!! no need to change how you look or anything about you, wonyoungism is suppose to help you to grow as a individual, please don't degrade yourself lol. If you feel like wonyoungism isn't for you, don't mold yourself to be something your not!! Remember YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL THE WAY YOU ARE!!!!

Mindset𓍢ִ໋✧˚ ༘ ⋆｡˚♡

 Wonyoung has a stern mindset, she always has a white swan mindset What is a white swan mindset? White swan~ You always focus on the good not the bad, a white swan mindset is being able to focus on the good and learn from your past failures :( You always have a smile on your face, knowing you will see results, you never put yourself down when someone talks bad about you! Wonyoung never puts herself down because she knows her value, she knows how much she is worth!!! People talk bad about you okay so what???? their is a reason they are behind you!!! Wonyoung also has a idgaf mindset, like queen wonyoung said "your you, im me" Wonyoung doesn't care about haters because she knows that at the end of the day, what did you benefit out of listening to the haters, nothing! you don't get a glow up instead you get glow down, when you listen to haters you end uplowering your value and lowering your worth! why? because you listen to people talk about you, instead of focusing on yourself, it is so important to just block out the haters, Wonyoung got so much hate at such a young age, she dealt with grown adults hating on her but what did she do? she ignored them, when you start doing that people will start to realize, you have a idgaf mindset, people will start to realize how stupid they look taking about you, when you honestly don't give a fuck (sorry for cussing lol) so the whole entire thing summed up, focus on yourself, get your work done and if anyone hates don't worry because when they realize that you don't care at the end of the day and they will be and look embarrassed.

Hobbies⋅⋆⁺𐚁♡ও⁺⋆⋅

Hobbies are really important because when you have so much extra time on your hands, you just might be a victim of scrolling endlessly on tiktok, instagram, twitter and, youtube. Wonyoung has hobbies such as modeling, she plays the piano, flute and violin and she learned English and Japanese. . . . Yes, I and many have fallen into that constant cycle of being lazy and just laying on the couch, hair messy, clothes dirty with a can of coke-a-cola and a bag of chips, eating myself away. Yes when in the moment it feels nice and being to take a break from reality, but question yourself after the lazy moment "why did I do that?" "what do I benefit from that besides watching 200 reels and binge watching 2 seasons of the k-drama series called happiness *i love that show lol*" but in all seriousness people will joke around and say "My hobby is eating" or "binge watching is my hobby" but lets be honest we all know that's not a hobby. Having hobbies can benefit you in so many ways. Hobbies help you with your emotional or mental health, hobbies can also help you interact/socialize with others, you can find new friends because you guys share a new hobby. Hobbies can be so fun and help you learn more things you didn't know before. . . . Hobby Idea list <3

*Painting

*Crafting

*Journaling

*Crocheting

*Sewing

*Photography

*Writing music

*Pottery

*Learn a new language (i am currently involved in this hobby and I love it lol)

*Find out new music

*Travel (only if your allowed to;)

*Blogging

*Join a club (jazz, art, photography or clubs you would enjoy!)

*Reading .

More physical hobbies

*Dancing

*Pilates

*Running

*Boxing

*Swimming

*Cycling

*Ice Skating

*Weight Lifting

the end love you stay safe my lovely oomfs<3

[captainaikus]

✨Chapter 2✨ part 1

IM SO SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG TO GET TO THIS I CANT BELIEVE ITS ALMOST BEEN A WEEK IVE BEEN MEANING TO READ IT AS SOON AS IT CAME OUT BUT LIFE GOT IN THE WAY BUT IM HERE NOW BELLE!!!

OH HO HO WE’RE STARTING WITH THE LETTER??? YESSS I COULDNT WAIT TO SEE WHAT SHE WROTE. *reads the first metaphor and starts sobbing* it’s a diary. ITS A DIARY OF THEIR RELATIONSHIP THROUGH HER EYES IM SOBBING RN. I honestly love the idea that Oliver doesn’t have the best relationship with his family. Adds more spice yknow? WAIT WAIT WAIT. HES READING THIS??? THIS IS HIS POV??? ASDHJHHFJJFFHHHFFF THIS IS AMAZING. Also I love how hurtful the readers love is portrayed in the diary. Making him read your years worth of heartache gives a chance for him to reflect on his actions. Oliver having Viking ancestry??? That’s a yes from me!!!! Not him already unconsciously planning a date to take you to see the northern lights and only being able to imagine your face. BOY YOU ARE DOWN SO BAD. WAKE UP ALREADY. NOOOOOOOOO NOT THE DREAM RELATIONSHIP. BELLE LOVE PLS. You’re killing me rn *sobs*. That scene with her framing abt their future relationship and his hand hosting over here whilst giving him a back hug was written so well I can literally feel it happening adhkhdhkgfjhgf ugh. God reading the diary entries was so painful. I can practically hear the riding and falling octaves of hurt and desperation and hollowness and acceptance. *cries* BELES IM NOT EVEN HALFWAY THROUGH YET HOW CAN I GO ON LIKE THIS???!!? *proceeds to keep reading* NO BUT HIM REALIZING HOW HES MORE THAN JUST A SCUMBAG IN SOMEONE EYES SOBBING SCREAMING CRYING RN BELLE. I really do this that he doesn’t view himself as highly as his ego on the field does. Aside from soccer, I feel like Oliver would have a few self worry issues. You’re making me think abt his character more and this isn’t even an analysts post asfkjgfggiij. I love how you’re exploring him as a person through his relationship with the reader. It’s really hard and tricky to develop a character using a relationship they have with someone else but you’ve done a fantastic job with it love!!! Oh timeskip?? I love your dialogue writing so much, you really make y/n have a personality and Oliver doesn’t just have the 2 traits of soccer and playboy. Uh oh not the mother call. You really know you’ve messed up royally bad of you get a video call from mom with the look. Rip Oliver you will forever be remembered in our memories. WE LOVE MOM IN THIS HOUSEHOLD FINALLY SOMEONE TALKING SOME SENSE INTO THIS MAN SERIOUSLY QUIT BEING AN ASS OLIVER I SAY THIS FOR THE SAKE OF YOUR HEART. I love how the loneliness slowly creeps up on him in the little things tho. The extra groceries the empty bedroom the lack of the faucet running in the morning just ugh yes I love it all. I wanna bet that he hasn’t had a girl over or even thought abt having one over since she left cage she’s all he can think abt. I’m right aren’t I? Yup I was right. FINALLY. ITS ABT DANG TIME. NOW PRESS THE CALL BUTTON OLIVER OR SO HELP ME-. Noooooo not the voicemails. This is a risky so freaking sad to read. He’s hurting so bad but I’m still kinda mad at him so like ugh. THE GASP I LET OUT WHEN I READ THAT HES GETTING A TATTOO FOR YOU *SCREAMETHS* I’m still grinning like a crazy person asdjjfgjkhghh. Maybe not the best emotional decision while drunk Oli BUT THE SYMBOLISM THE SYMBOLIDM IS WHATS GOT ME GRINNING LIKE A FOOL. Belle you’ve got me loving all the angsty stuff *cries*. wait what. did. did I read that right???????? 6 years????? 6???? Six??????? ITS BEEN 6 YEARS SINCE THEYVE LAST SEEN EACH OTHER IM-. *wheezes and continues to furiously scroll* Oliver don’t you dare lie to yourself and say it was a drink regret we all know it wasn’t. The time skip was well place though. Unexpected but understandable. It was really needed and they’ve both grown separately which is what I was really hoping for. But see. Since the time skip was so early. I know there’s gonna be a LOT of drama upcoming. And I for one cannot wait!!! Sobs not him carrying your diary with him in his bag everywhere he goes like a lost wayward lover. That’s so mystical and romantic. Never through I’d use those two words to deserve Oliver of all people but your writing is just that good.

- ✨ anon

✨Chapter 2✨ part 2 Note: I cant believe it made me divide my ask into 2 parts tumblr do better smh That’s so mystical and romantic. Never through I’d use those two words to deserve Oliver of all people but your writing is just that good. CRIES KNOWING HE PROBABLY THOUGHT HE SAW A GLIMPSE OF YOU BUT IT WAS SOMEONE ELSE EVERY TIME AND HE WAS LEFT SO HEARTBROKEN AND SAD AND DISAPPOINTED EVERY TIME. OOF. Big oof. 6 years and no women huh? You messed up big time bud. Thank your wife Belle that’s she’s kind enough to give you a (probably) happy ending with this fic (I hope). NOT HIM SLOWLY ADOPTING YOUR MANNERISMS AND HABITS AS THE YEARS WENT BY. Seriously you pulled out all the heartache stops for this chapter Belle. Prediction. Why do I think the chapters gonna end with them meeting again? Cries. Yes. Wallow in despair and mistakes Oliver. It’ll be much help in your character development. Oliver honey. You can’t do this to me. Pls I cant take the pathetic heartache. And the strangers wondering what’s got him looking so sad too??? Stan me now why don’t you? UGH BELLE THIS US SO FREAKING GOOD!!!! Shout out to Sendou for being a true friend. I wonder if his relationship will Oliver will be developed a little later on too? Maybe. No. No no no. Ohhhhhhh my God. NOOOOOOOOO IM SCREAMING RN BITING MY PILLOW I SO DID NOT THINK YOU WERE GONNA GO THIS ROUTE BUT I HAVE NO COMPLAINTS. OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD I JUST ASFJHFGJFFHGDFGFFGGG SHES HERE ISNT SHE???? SHE WANTED TO SHIW THEIR DAUGHTER HER DADDY AND SEE HIM TOO UGH I AM BELLE YOU ABSOLUTE MENACE I LOVE THIS SO MUCH. “Staring into the camera wondering if you were watching him” BOY SHES IN THE STANDS WITH YOUR DAUGHTER. Not me slowly losing my mind over this new development don’t mind me asdfjkgggjjj. Ohhhh okay so my prediction for her being in the stands and having their daughter watch the game intentionally was false BUT I MIGHT STILL BE RIGHT ABT THE CLIFFHANGER ENDING LETS SEE. Pshhhhhhhhh Oliver bring bad with kids is actually so hilarious to me. God having a daughter makes so much more sense now with the context of cutting off contact and the little details. You could have predicted but it was a very low chance you did that part so well girl!!!! ASTJFDHKIFFJKUFFGJJUFDFFFF NOT THE OLDER SISTER!!!!!!!???? WILL SHE LET THEM MEET OR NO??????!!!!! AHHHHH I CANT TAKE THIS. AND I WAS RIGHT ABT THE NANES BEING SIMILAR I DIDNT MENTION IT BUT I HAD AN INKLING. LIVI = OLIVIA = OLIVER????? Yessssss give me the parental relationship development and parent-child similarities. I literally speed read the rest of it cause oh my God I couldn’t stop myself. I loved this chapter so much. His resolve to win you back over??? FREAKING TOOK 6 YEARS AND A SECRET DAUGHTER BUT WE’RE FINALLY HERE!!!!!!!! Everything abt this chapter was amazing and I loved it so much seriously you did an amazing job with this!!!! The formatting and borders look fantastic btw!!! I cannot wait for the next chapter but pls pls pls ake your time and don’t overwork yourself sweetheart!!!! And again I’m sorry for the late response and lack of interactions. Life got busy and I’ve been occupied mentally with friendship stuff. Sighs. Anyways. IM GLAD TO BE BACK NOW THO!!!! I wanna catch up!!! How are you love? How’s break been? And uni? Are you feeling better? I hope you are!!! And that you get all the writing inspiration and kudos on ao3 (unfortunately I can’t spam the kudos button or I would have) and much interactions on your blog!!!! ALSO. Question. But would you prefer me writing the reviews for the chapters on your blog or in the comments section of the fic on ao3? *sending many virtual hugs* - ✨ anon

FINALLY. the much awaited reply - I really loved reading every min of this and now I'm gonna talk about every small detail of it so it's gonna be a long ask. So yeah lets dive right into it ! We did start off with her diary. And YES. the story is a dual perspective one so there is developments on Oliver's side as well. The idea of him having viking ancestry came from vinland saga for me as well as the study of vikings - most of them came from the nordic belt so there was a possibility of that and honestly... viking! Oliver? *fans face* Now the whole thing abt the back hug and that scene? That was out of a dream I had a couple of months back that I was talking to blue about. I just love the whole narrative where you're hating him and loving him at the same time ToT

And yes! so one of the issues with Oliver's character (i'm not sure if you're reading the manga or not -) but even as a football player, he does have more addition to his personality than his nature and looks; adults took away his future from him. He wanted to be a striker but because of his coach, he had to give up that dream and become a defender instead. Another thing I like is making (y/n) have a personality as well as strong dialogues. One of the issues with fanfic writing is that the reader is also a if not the main protagonist of the story. Some of the (y/n)s out there (and I'm not saying this to stir anything up) are too soft spoken or give in too easily. Some authors mention that the reader is stubborn either through description or dialogues but they don't show it or show the reader being too dependent on someone. And honestly, I'm glad you brought out the point that the way I characterize people has more to do with stuff that really counts as a personality including Oliver since he has just been restrained to football and being a playboy -smh. Since my stories have less of smut and more of plot, there has to be character development and since I like seeing people blossom, might as well do it with the characters right? and in this case, its to do with time. he does get lonely - and there's an explanation for that in the story. So the story about the tattoo... I was planning on getting an arm tattoo done for him. like a fawn over the shoulder and then adding stuff to it... but Oliver doesn't strike as the type to get tattoos. So he got one on the ankle and...yeah no I'm not giving spoilers for further chapters just yet. |>.<| Ik the time skip seems big... but yeah. 6 years - I can't believe I fell for Oliver, then again. he's practically the only sane one in there and maybe Bachira... or else everyone is either depressed or feral. not in between literally.

6 years and Oliver hasn't had women. And ofc my story has a happy ending! - 'hurt me and put me back together' is my motto atp I'm glad that you're enjoying the angst starry - cause that's where most of my character development is. And there's more drama in the next chapter. So... did no one notice that Oliver didn't pull out? *laughing* well... yes. we did have a daughter. Oliver is actually terrible with babies. I'm happy to hear that i pulled it off well T.T Well... chapter 3 is packing. I already have a title ready And its fine! honestly- its good to take a break from tumblr once in a while So here's my update - I managed to put on weight during my break. 3 kgs/ 7 pounds consistently working out at the gym and uni... is exhausting. but we're working and I also bought a lot of books during break (chainsawman as one of them) and another one that I'm really engrossed in atm, Anything is fine Starry!! I'm keeping tumblr active in case someone wants to tell me something anonymous or discussions for character development. and I saw your comment on my fic on ao3 - i wanna say that I really appreciate it cause that was one of the first comments that fic ever got and I'm happy about it (gonna respond to it soon as well) *sending bear hugs*

Starry his collarbones are catching me off guard -

[mordeiswrld]

“Im drained...im unmotivated...im tired...im done. So many hurtful things have been said to me by the ones who were supposed to care for me...i still rememeber it, and some of it still goes on. Why do I remember the things that hurt me...?”

“Wear some makeup maybe that’ll make it better” -because i wouldnt smile for a picture i didnt wanna be in

“She’s a grown woman she knows what she’s doing”- my great grabdmother & mom when i got mad about my siblings (1-2 and 6-7 years old) being out without me and with my grandma who hasnt had a baby in over a decade

“You need to stop dressing that way”- my great grandma when i showed up to my her house in an oversized sweater

“Your too young”- my mom when i told her i wanted a binder and that i was a boy at 11-12 years old

“ive always wanted a boy”- my mom. Then she got what she wanted and started being ‘better’ as if she couldn’t do that with her 1st 2 kids

“Yeah mhm, or girl what?😒”-my mom, dismissing me whenever i try to tell her something im happy about

“You need to start talking to your grandparents”- my mom everytime i ask her for something, now im scared to ask since everything i ask for is “too much” even though she buys herself stuff everyday

“Ill talk to him”- my mom whenever me and my dad get into our fights...it never gets better and she never talks to him and always takes his side

“Shut the fuck up”- my dad whenever i try to explain something to him even if it’s not that serious(its never that serious)

“Stop being selfish”- my dad whenever i say no to my siblings using my stuff that is strictly MINE and that i dont have to share if i dont want to

“Watch your brother” my dad almost all the time everyday and they’ll just be lying around doing nothing with the excuse of ‘i work i need a break’ you dont need a break all damn week while i have to go to school and handle your wild 3 year old while your in your mid 30s

“Sounds like a personal problem” my mom whenever i tell her that I genuinely can't handle my siblings and am on the verge of snapping (violently)

“Maybe if you had a bedtime then yknow...i dont wanna have to say it”- my mom around her friend talking about my low grade in a class and thinking its bc of electronics when in reality my mental health is in hell and ive been crying more than usual and i dont have the motivation to keep pushing on anymore, but she thinks im up at 12:30 bc of a phone...

“Congratulations”- my mom when i show her my all As. But won’t be as nice and be a bit irritated that i got a low C in something she knows I struggle in

“I'm so proud of you”- my dad hugging me for the straight As. He doesnt hug me ever and he never says those words to me. Not even when its a minor accomplishment

“Has your father ever told you he loves you?” my mom years ago in a random parking lot that got me realizing last week that he never says he loves me willingly, he has to be forced

“I'm obligated to be there” my grandfather after getting married and never calling us to see how we are

“Your ___ eye is bigger than your ___” my friend. I always liked my eyes growing up...not anymore

“She ugly as hell” my 9th grade classmate he just says it whenever he can. I dont even have to be talking to him

It’s getting worse day by day...nothing i do is enough...im tired..

admin zjay

[aroace-poly-show]

rating pjsk tiering songs except i am not a super experienced tierer and i’ve only done highish tiers like 3 times these are just ones i know

hitorinbo envy- 1/10 i’m sorry i fucking HATE this song im so tired of it every saa anyo anyo i have to hear takes a year off my life and it would be a 0/10 but its also the shortest song so i dont have to suffer very long and i use it on a daily basis even when im not tiering bc im too tired to want to play the game a lot. but i mute my tablet whenever i do have it play cause its driving me insane i can feel my eyes glaze over whenever i play this one

lost and found- 6/10. really pretty song tbh!! if i hadn’t played it so much before it’d be higher. its a longer song though which means i have to suffer through it more but even then i dont mind playing it i do like this song. would i listen to it outside of pjsk tiering? no probably not but its not the songs fault its just that i’ve had to hear it too much but compared to envy? literal sound of angels above

hatsune miku creation myth- 7/10. i used to listen to this song actually!! i actually don’t know how much of a tiering song this is though. but either way i dont mind it!! its a fun chart and i really wanna fc it on expert sometime again. its just Very Fucking Long also. so im glad it doesn’t come up that much bc i think i would also go insane with this song eventually

melt - 8/10. i got tired of this one a while ago but then i started playing project dive and its grown on me since then. i also dont play this one as much i’ve noticed so i have more appreciation for it now its not that bad. also really satisfying to get that one bit at the end right.

jackpot sad girl- 7/10. this ones more for challenge shows i believe as are the next ones too. anyway i like this mafuyu comm a lot. i dont like the beginning of the master chart though its kinda annoying for me at least. dont have much to say though

viva happy- 6/10. see its really nice to have a change of pace (cause ive been doing nothing but envy or jackpot sad girl for challenge shows when i tier) but this one sounds like one that could get on my nerves pretty fast. but it hasn’t done that yet so it doesn’t get a bad rating. viva viva happy!! turututu <3

cendrillion-6/10. same as jackpot sad girl except i just like the song in general less. also the beginning. the song takes FOREVER to even start i will lose my mind pretty quickly i think. i prefer the project diva version since it gets to the actual playing part a lot faster

idk any other tiering songs if there are any more

[reenajohn]

have been so long so much have happen

so have been busy with all my doctors appointments in hospital and what not

just wanna say im sooo grateful we met and bringing miie here and there for all my appointments

so he noticed my weight loss without any reason nor any intention to lose weight and also my fainting episode that keep getting worse tbh i get my smart watch not cos i workout but cos i know have those episodes happening now and then but not as close i just wanna know how my heart beats going like is it cos blood not pumping right or something that’s why i get it. any way he saw the weight loss and figured it out something was wrong i was 1st being send to government hospital cos of my fainting but well they just put miie at the side walk give miie IV bag took my blood for test and told miie nothing wrong my bf told miie to take the report back to him he will find his friends (doctor) to read it no way u r ok when the fainting happen two time just within hrs apart as i asked for the blood test report they told miie i can get it in health app the next day i was like ok i when home in the middle of the night they dont even keep miie till next day even tho i told them im alone no one there to pick miie up great … the next day download my blood test results and send to bf and he send to his friends and straight up his friends call back tell him that red blood cell count is very low and is kinda low nutrition and he scold miie for not eating right as i only eat bread most of the time and so he keep asking miie to eat better and everytime we meet he will get miie real food like chicken meat and what not but well fainting episode still happen and his find his insurance friend to get miie a full body check up in private hospital, all the blood test and also put camera in miie to see if any inside problems turn out blood test shows i have hyperthyroidism and his doctor friend suggest us to get test from government health care as this way the bill will be much more cheaper then private health care so of i go to government health care he took miie there and 6 trip there to get miie to a government hospital health care system and now finally getting it monitored and also get miie to eye specialist as i was complaining eye pain pretty frequently and this illness will affect my eyes too so eye specialist have to check and monitor on my eye. turn up my ex bf who poked miie in the eye like 8 years ago is caseing my eye pain as it scar my eye and have not healed up since then doctor told miie to keep it moist so it will not hurt cos when ever its dry the scar kinda open up like how ur skin get cut and is opening up as and when u rubbing against finger and it don heal well when that happen so keeping it moist helps to keep it close hope it will heal soon so i have appointment with eye doctor 3 month after and some how my grown a bump on my eye lip and i ask to get it fixed before my birthday since i have an appointment right before my birthday and on the same day the doctor remove it with a small surgery as miie to rest for a day so now the bump is fix when for a review today and found that my the other eye is growing one too and she helps miie to get it out straight away not letting it turn into a bump and she told miie all good now will see miie in like 6months time so great now my next appointment is my hyperthyroid doctor appointment this most likey will be on going for longer as my thyroid still not stable yet as my dose of medication when down like 1 months ago how my next blood test appointment will not go crazy if not im sooo going back to my old dose yup will updated again if i have time any way my weight is back so i guess im doing well i think. 🤔

[sometipsygnostalgic]

found entrapta in xc3

except he is is this 4 year old boy (12ish physically)

his name is Valdi and he looks like a Mechonis (android) from Xenoblade Chronicles 1 except hes vat grown and ages at the same rate as humans somehow because thats how everyone in this game ages, it is pretty fucked up

he is the “best engineer in this side of the war” 

anyway here are the reasons valdi is entrapta

1. he picked a fight with 6 experienced fighters because he wanted to get more supplies for his tech 2. when we beat him he goes WOW, SO COOL, TEACH ME EVERYTHING YOU KNOW and our characters are like ???? why would we do that? you tried to fight us??? 3. our resident nopon techie guy is like "your robots were shit because you upgraded light armored robots with heavy robot weaponry" and hes like "oooh that makes sense" 4. "what colony are you from?" "30!!" "who is the commander?" "oh that would be me!!" "you fucking wot mate???" we see him talking to an exasperated advisor, he literally ditches all of his duties so he can come out and fight us with robots 5. "it's okay i can walk home and make new robots to escort me from random scrap!"  "wouldnt that require salvaging??" "oh shit, yeah. uhh i might need help" 6. "what were we doing here again??" "salvaging??? did you forget??" "oh yeah!!!" 7. he only makes Attack robots because he loves making Attack robots and has literally never considered doing anything else 8. he sees a bunch of destroyed robots, indicating a lost battle, and is like "wow! this makes me sad because i just WANT TO SALVAGE ALL THIS TECH" and the other characters want to fight him, and then he comes up with some random profound shit he heard from his dead master 9. he. he says this!!!! he says this fucking line!!!!!!

Entrapta: Well, there’s no reason to get huffy because an experiment fails.  Failure is a vital part of scientific endeavor!!!!

(i actually made this joke on tumblr the other day after it was in a trailer, and forgot about it and was taken offguard when he said that quote ingame) 10. he is told "you know if you are sick of people taking advantage of your Attack robots and getting themselves in trouble, you can start making Non-Attack robots, right???" and he goes "OH YEAH... IVE NEVER THOUGHT OF THAT BEFORe, WTF" 11. he makes an Emily on the spot. he makes a robot to look after himself out of scrap from robots that hed built to kill people. i dont make this up.  12. someone from Management (one of the bad guys) shows up and says "wtf??? you wanna stop making destroyer robots??? from what i recall, you said "ill be fine as long as i can make my death robots", right???"

13. he also doesn’t really give a shit about helping Agnians, the opposite side of the war, or his colony’s sworn enemy Ouroboros, because he kind of sees everyone as an opportunity to learn more about technology. he is the ONLY character in the game so far to not care what side of the fight he’s helping. 

EDIT: 14. even though he kind of sends them to their death, he thinks all the robots he creates are sapient. he says “in the next life ill make you into the best protector robot” immediately before he pulls a gun on his best creation to destroy it. then his giant mech is stolen, his emily-bot dies protecting him, and he has his mandatory xenoblade chronicles breakdown about how he is a small guy but his robots taught him he was worth something. this kid is fucking wild. 

EDIT 2: 15. i told him everything in his life was a lie and he didnt give a shit!!! he let me liberate his colony without asking any questions or talking to any of them about it. 

16. then he asked to join my team and when i accepted it said that I “inherited his traversal ability and can now climb up walls”, which sounds about right. 

[pespillo]

man.  

you know what , yeah , ive been a major jackass for gd knows what long, i am bossy, i am annoying at times, i tend to take the wheel umprompted , i think I Know SOOOO much even when really im throwing stuff at the wall seeing what sticks best, i hype myself up because i legitimately feel like i need to do it , maybe im overcompensating a lot, i know i can make people feel Bad when i talk to them and criticize them , i think you all got all the right to criticize me when its due, i Should Drop Shit faster when some things turns out to be bad and not just hold the hot coal 6 months after the fact because my head tells me “there may be a chance things do an upturn right? maybe theres some inner company logistics i dont know about” n wait around like a fucking dog, barking but not biting . I Should have bitten. Maybe i should have been a kinder person sometimes , maybe i should have been a meaner person other times . And if i ever made you feel bad over something small, i Am sorry, i mean it, you deserved better.

but when i tell you all you dont know even half of me i really mean it, you guys dont know the fucking shit ive been through the past 5 years dealing with family and unemployment , i know it seems like i fucking got it alll together , that because i draw well enough to gain a measly income every month , im just living la vida loca and building this hugeee ego about my persona online , You dont fucking know me , and if you do? lemme tell you, i got dumped out from a newish group because apparently they couldnt Ever Tell me that i was a bit too bossy when roleplaying for a stupid fucking arg , they just decided to all block me and ghost me , PRETENDING to be all like “no no we wouldnt ever just cut people off like that lol” , i tried acting like i was gonna be fine, but i felt worthless and abandoned for a good ass month or two , like i did something  so awful that it was just better to dump me off like that without any answers or closure , turns out , it was just some petty rp bullshit because how dare i tell someone that their writing can be a bit Much i guess. and you know what ? after i learned that this month, im done being a spineless doormat , i realized just by this stupid drama, i WAS being a doormat to cawthon , i was treating this franchise like it was a real “friend” just because im horribly mentally ill about it and let it overtake me in my late teens, and since it was sooo hard to dump a “friend” i just felt like i JUST couldnt do it full on. thats so fucking dumb isnt it?

listen i have no fucking idea where some of you get the idea that i am some kind of , harasser or some shit like, fine , if you build this idea of me in your head because you think i receive too many compliments (its not like im asking for them , i am not gonna reject Kindness) sure whatever, but i dont waste my fucking time sending anons or calling out random people for nothing, literally i just sit here having to witness vile shit out in the public from people who are legit unapologetic and then putting out a post or two saying “hey what the fuck is wrong with these people please dont expose vulnerable people to the gross shit you put out for sexual gratification”. When do i ever act like im hot shit? i feel like a fucking wimp every day of my life, i feel like im a fragile bitch about everything , like i walk around and feel like i wanna cry but im supposed to suck it alllll up because im a grown ass man now and i need to keep people i care about safe , at all costs, even if most of the time i really wanna say “i wanna kill myself” .  

ive said this before, but i am not gonna lay my guts in the sun for strangers to gawk and look at me , not anymore. this is the LAST time i am laying down my problems like this , if you want to seriously talk to me. do it , do it because i literally dont care about blocking random people , i am not gonna fucking block any of you unless you legitimately want me to or , actively try harassing me or harm me or others . And i have good faith in so many people, you should feel good about yourself for having guts to tell it like it is.

anyways, i wish everyone a happy new year´s eve or just , a happy new year, keep yourselves safe and have a good time 

[krewbies]

I'm so glad to see Bolin fics bc your girl has had a crush on him for awhile. Can you write something where Bolin proposes? Timeline wise, sometime after saving the city in book 4? 👉👈

awww i love this :( i hope you enjoy!!!

••••••

The last month had been absolutely insane. You and Bolin had both been busy- the Earth Kingdom was pulling itself together again, Republic City was still recuperating from Kuvira’s attack, but there was still a sense of peace. For now, everything had been resolved.

Bolin. Boy, was he thankful for you. You had supported him, rooted for him, since the days when the two of you had just been two clueless teenagers in a big city. Sure, you gave him a hard time about unknowingly working under a fascist regime, but that was quickly forgiven after he helped save the Beifongs. And, sure, sometimes you could be overbearing, you didn’t want him to hurt himself after all!

It was so daunting for him, standing in a flashy jewelry store. He had grown up poor after all, he was used to just scraping by with Mako. But Mako wasn’t there, and neither were you, but the memory of a wedding- Varrick and Zhu Li’s- was fresh in his mind. 

It was standing there, seeing you in the crowd, sitting with his brother and closest friends, glossy eyed and awe stricken, that he realized how ready he was to let you know just how much he appreciated and adored you.

The ring he picked was small and modest. Big and expensive wasn’t exactly something that either of you enjoyed. Your relationship had always been surrounded by chaos and dramatics and other people’s conflicts, and deep down, you both just wanted simple after all these years. You weren’t teenagers anymore, and there were no more wars to be fought, and there was finally room for peace.

~

“It’s so pretty.” You sighed, glancing up at the evening sky. Bolin turned his head to admire you, his eyes following the curve of your nose and examining the color of your eyes as if he hadn’t already memorized his favorite color a thousand times.

“Well, I think you’re a lot prettier.” His voice cracked. That always happened when he was nervous. And he was wringing his hands. You decided not to ask. Instead, you laughed, trying to ease whatever was running through his mind. He wasn’t one to hide anything he was feeling, so he’d tell you when he was ready to.

“Y’know, it’s so weird that we met here- wow, it’s been 5 or 6 years now.” You swung your legs and ran your hands over the wood of the bench. It was nostalgic, and reminded you of when things were simple, and you reached out to take his hand. 

Now or never. Now or never. His hands were oddly sweaty too. Huh. He stood up abruptly, back turned to you, leg shaking slightly.

“Um, okay, so, I’m, uh, usually good at talking, but I’m not right now because I love you so much and I don’t want this to end badly, I feel like you feel the same way but I’m not sure and-”

“Bo!” You stopped him in the middle of his speech, turning his body around and taking his face in your hands. He glanced at you as you stroked his cheeks, taking a deep breath. “What’s wrong?” You continued after a few long seconds of silence. He looked down at the ground and hesitantly opened his mouth again.

“(Y/N), I just... I love you so much. And, and all of the stuff that’s happened in the last few years has made me realize how lost I would be without you. You laugh at all my jokes, and you’re always there whether things are going good for me or not, you always make sure I’m okay,” He took a deep breath and shot you a sweet smile, and reached a hand up to twist the piece of hair on his forehead. “And Mako likes you! That’s so great! I’m saying so much, I don’t even know where I’m going. At... At the end of the day I just want you to be safe and happy, and I want me to be happy too, and I would be happiest if,” He slowly knelt down, taking one of your hands in his, and proudly showing you what he had picked out. “If you would just be mine forever?”

Your heart raced. This wasn’t happening, it couldn’t be. You wanted to cry. You had never entertained the thought of him asking you; it had always felt too good to be true. That he was so perfect, and he only wanted you. A million thoughts ran through your head, but one was louder than the others, and it helped you utter a simple response.

“Of course.” You stared at each other for a moment, hearts racing and the cool night air surrounding you. Finally, finally, a smile sprung on his face as he picked himself up, placing both of his hands on your shoulders.

“Really?” You stopped yourself from giggling at his shocked expression,

“I’d be an idiot to not want to spend the rest of my life with you.” You replied, tears threatening to spill. He engulfed you in one of the best hugs you’ve ever had, warming you up inside and out. This was it. This is what all of that was for. 

He kissed you softly after he pulled away. “Wait! We have to go tell everyone!” He was so giddy, rocking up and down on the balls of his feet, shaking you. “This is so exciting. I get to marry you.” Every reservation you had ever held in your life was gone, and they were replaced by the knowledge that he would be yours and you would be his.

~

i hope you enjoyed!!!! i just wanted to say, thank you guys so much. I made this blog thinking it would just be a fun past time but you are all so kind, my inbox has been flooded with the kindest things, i spent like an hour crying over it earlier. i’m sorry its been a few days since i last put something out, ive just been insanely busy and ive been jumping between writing things because i have a ton of requests. i just wanna give you all a hug! i feel like i hit 100 followers overnight and now i’m at around 140, its surreal. thank you. ps, this can perhaps be read as a sequel to the hcs i did about the airbender? but its up to u ;)

[bloopferheart]

Sk8ti theories!!

Spoilers for all the current episode of sk8 (up to episode 6)

- also sorry if this all over the place lmao

so i have many theories but i wanna talk about the one that im most leaning towards! so personally what i think is going to happen is that reki and langa are going to fall in love, they both fall in love with each other and i think there is going to be hinted canon romance??? i dunno they will DEFINITELY have a deeper bond than they currently are at. we can see that each episode they are getting closer and closer, langa is smiling more and they are starting to become more "touchy-feely" with each other (*coughs* the latest blessing of an episode we had, ep6, the beach episode <3). we can also see that they love each in the translation of the end credits the lines.  "i like what ive always liked", "lets keep feelings",  "lets keep your heart"  , "let's go together" ,"you are always in my heart" - (fuckin sobs kakjdsh). i see the end credits as a convo between langa and reki so these are things that *both* of them are saying. so, yes, i think it will be requited love....at first. (fuck here comes the angst)

time to talk about fucking ad*m,,,,so what i think is that adam is going to draw langa away from reki and sort of influence him into the world of reckless skating. langa is so drawn to adam that he starts to skate more dangerously and adapt the same ways of skating that adam does. becuase of his, he starts to drift away from reki. reki usually skates by the rules and doesnt cheat, or at least he doesnt go as far as adam does. reki is always ready to try new things but he defientley isnt as reckless as langa will end up being. reki will start to feel as though he is falling more and more behind langa until langai so caught up in reckless skating that he is just gone. reki realizes its too late and that langa is too far ahead he cant keep up (just like in the intro when reki falls and when langa doesnt turn around to look back at him and how langa dissapears). 

so, besides reki falling behind langa, how will this *directly* affect reki? well i defientley think that reki has some trauma surrounding adam considering how he fucking screamed langas name and had a nightmare about adam,,,like,,,,idk :( but continuing on, i think that langa is going to make a very dangerous bet, like a life threatning bet that impacts reki. and i think that langa *finally* realizes his mistakes when its too late. so, this is where my theory starts to go 2 ways. 

1) reki will,,,*takes a deep breath* dies. what if langa makes such a dangerous bet and adams influence is too much that he accidnetly kills reki? BUT tbh this is one of my theories that i dont actually lean a lot towards. the next one is what i actually think is more likely to happen based on the ending credits,

2) reki *will* get hurt, but emotionally not physically (or maybe physically but i dont think so). he will see that langa is never coming back to him (or at least he thinks that) and decides to just leave him. its at this time that langa realizes "fuck ive gone too far" but its too late too chase after reki because reki already tried chasing after him and langa just ignored him. reki and langa will then drift apart although as they spend time apart they realize how much they need and miss each. what gives me this impression is when the end credits say:

"we are grown up now, can be honest i will remember tightly tied shoe laces, lets make it , my favourite colour, its infinte, i like what ive always liked" this whole phrase reminds me of how anga talks about how he still thinks of the times when he and reki would skate *for fun* together, and not for the thrill/adrenaline rush.

"i like what ive always liked' implied hes always liked reki and despite drifting apart, he still does love him. his love for reki is infinite.(and rekis love for him is infinite)

"lets talk silly stories be with you forever i want to smile by your side" implied that langa (who i assume this verse is in the pov of) still wants to be with reki and regrets the choices hes made. "lets go together, go with you" he still wants to go with reki, he still wants to skate with him.

"even if tomorrow this world ends, i dont need anything special at the same pace as usual lets just be who we are. yes, "now" is so beautiful" so lets disect the first part of that, i think that by this langa or reki (i dont quite know who, i think langa tho) is thinking that all he wants is just go back to all the days (at the same pace as usual) and just go at the nice easy-going  pace they were at.

a very big indictor of langa realizing he sitll loves reki is the line "lets go togehter, go with you *not only in happy times*" i think that langa is saying that despite reki being upset and feeling behind, langa does in fact wish he had been by his side and he wants to be there for reki.

"at any time, be by your side", "lets go together", "as long as we have that feeling", "i am here by your side", "you are always in my heart" literally is so gay like guys cmon, langa deifnetley still loves him

so what happens next? langa now realizes he *does* love reki and that adam is a big piece of shit but reki is gone (reki still loves him and thinks about him tho: as seen in line “youre always in my heart” i believe this is said by both of them) 

so, in conclusion my favourite theory is that at the very end of sk8 reiki and langa will sort of have individual shots and then they will run into each other in the street, both carying skateboards. langa will reach out to reki to "catch him" or something idk SOMETHING WILL HAPPEN WITH HANDS AND WE WONT SEE FACES AT FIRST and then the shot is their faces and they look at each other and just smile! I THINK IT WOULD BE SUCH A GOOD ENDING AND I THINK IT WOULD FIT THE END SO WELL YA KNOW??? SO yeah!!!! thats my fav theory!! 

i do have one more i just wanted to touch up on tho :eyes:

HANDS!!! OMG HANDS R SO IMPORTNAT IN THIS SHOW MY GOSH. and as each episode goes on we can see they are getting closer and closer with their hands. it starts off ith taking off the water bottle, and bandaging each other hands, then the hand shake, the hand shake TO THE CHEST, and then as seen in episode 6, the hug, and finally langa reaching out to save reki and pulling him close. i have a feeling as the episodes go on they are gonna get more "touchy-feeling" and what if langa or reki like touches the others face or brushes hair out their face? like what if,,,,reki forgot his headband or cant find it and he leands over to fix his skateboard or something and langa just brushes the hair out of his eyes? or what if one of them puts their hand on each others cheeks and kisses them? IDK GUYS I HAVE A STRONG FEELING WE ARE GONNA GET A BIT OF ROMANCE- But uh yeah

I have a tone of angsty theories involving adam but i deinfetley think we are going to get a bittersweet ending,,,,

 I'll probaby upload more theories later on but these are them so akjdhsa yeah! my dms are open for sk8ti discussion and if u want my discord (which is easier to commuicate on for me) then just dm me!)

[deantransgressions2]

7x03 the girl next door

#1: sam uses his hand scar to break himself out of his hallucination. dean taught and encouraged this coping mechanism. aka dean encouraged sam to use self harm as a coping mechanism...knowing that sam would do anything he said.

time tag: 6:59

#2: "girl, interrupted over there" (said to bobby, about sam) why does he feel the need to talk shit ab sam w bobby every chance he gets? if he wanted sam to talk to him honestly, then maybe he shouldn't be a dick 100% of the time. especially about feelings.

time tag: 8:05

#3: "sam's not a curve. he's a frickin' time bomb" (said to bobby) ok so why do you punch him in ab a day? why do u encourage him to continue to hunt? why are u still an asshole?

time tag: 8:10

#4: punches sam the second he opens his motel room door. punches sam, who just had a serious brain injury a couple weeks ago, and who is also experiencing psychosis....dean PUNCHES him. ????? lmk what "good big brother" would ever do this.

time tag: 31:56

#5: "new rule, you steal my baby you get punched" okay . 1) new rule? sam is a grown man he doesn't need rules. and 2) he gets punched if he touches your car? oh sure that sounds fair.

god ive been waiting for this. okay true story: i once stole my older sister's car when i was 15 and i CRASHED it, dented the whole back end, and you wanna know what she did?? literally nothing. she told me i was an idiot and that was it. i sure as hell wasn't assaulted .

time tag: 32:04

#6: interesting parallel of young sam having to use a cold soda to ice his black eye, after getting beaten up by bullies...and present sam having to use a cold soda to ice the same injury, after getting beaten up by dean.

time tag: 32:08

#7: "you never told me that" yeah why the fuck would he dean? u literally get joy out of murdering monsters....

time tag: 33:54

#8: "she's dropping bodies man...which means we got to drop her, no matter how many merit badges she racked up when she was a kid. i'm sorry but it's that simple"

the way dean desperately tries to make what they do "simple" so he never has to look into the moral implications of anything he does.. it's upsetting. if he can't understand the complexity of monsters at the ripe age of 30? 31? then he shouldn't be a fucking hunter.

time tag: 34:27

#9: "look man, i get it. you meet a girl, you feel that spark, there's nothing better. but this freak?" sam's reaction to this kinda speaks for itself. but remember how many times dean called sam a freak in s1-5?? if dean views amy as a cold blooded killer that needs to be murdered, then how does he view sam, if he calls them the same term?

time tag: 35:25

#10: sam, the only one that has history with amy, the only one that talked with amy about the recent deaths, says amy doesn't need to be killed. dean doesn't believe him even though he has 0 evidence to prove otherwise.

time tag: 35:59

#11: "look you don't trust her, fine. trust me." (sam to dean) dean has said multiple times he doesn't value or trust sam's opinion on anything, ever. so kinda dumb of sam to ask him of this ngl.

time tag: 36:28

#12: deans says that he will trust sam because he "got to start sometime, right?" which is a fat ass lie.

time tag: 36:43

#13: "but people, they are who they are. no matter how hard you try, you are what you are." (said to amy) wow. what a beautifuly horrific, degrading, dumbass poem dean. THIS is why sam believed that voicemail in the church with lilth. THIS is why moc!dean is just regular dean. THIS is why dean is 15x17 is not ooc.

time tag: 38:25

#14: "trust me i'm an expert" (said to amy) an expert?? on monsters? no. ur an expert on killing monsters, not monsters lives themselves. SAM knew what amy went through, he knew what it was like to hate what you are, what it's like to try and defy the evil inside you. dean doesn't know jack shit about that. he isnt an expert, he's a bratty child who craves attention.

time tag: 38:35

#15: killed amy. dean knew she had a son. he knew amy was a mortician, and thats how her and jacob got the food to survive. he knew all this yet still murdered amy, and left jacob an orphan. jacob now has no other choice but to murder to survive. very smart dean. big brain.

time tag: 39:14

#16: "you ever kill anyone? well if you do i'll come back for you." (said to JACOB) he's like 8 leave him the hell ALONE dean. threatening a child? god none of us are surprised.

time tag: 29:25