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itsclydebitches · 1 year

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it genuinely surprises me that CRWBY wants to push this idea that the bees have been planned for ten years (idk if you're on twitter but yang's VA responded to someone who said 'wow this was planned for the past two years?' and she said '2? try 10' and an animator said something similar in another thread), because at least if they owned up about how they hadn't actually decided to do anything with the bees officially until fairly late in the game, they wouldn't basically be saying 'yeah we had this planned, we just never bothered to write anything confirming or alleging it for years because reasons'

it's just infuriating bc like you said, the straight relationships are not treated this way. pyrrha's crush on jaune, jaune's crush on weiss, and weiss' crush on neptune in the early volumes are all entirely unambiguous, despite none of them looking at the camera and spelling it out in dialogue. nora and ren's relationship is likewise unambiguous, or at the very least nora's interest in ren (leaving ren's feelings to take longer in the story to really be given form).

and EVEN IF we accept that they didn't want blake and yang to be aware of their own feelings for whatever reason (even if that's shoddily hamfisted in the narrative--they don't have any of the conversations they should have had post volume 6 to work through their feelings, leaving the confession in this limbo where it's simultaneously forced by the narrative and yet also like 'uh, duh? why are they so worried about confessing? what obstacles remain in their path that weren't clearly deemed unimportant by the fact that the story never cared to linger there?') there's zero excuse for the story not choosing to unambiguously confirm their sexualities.

blake could have had a conversation with ilia where she made it clear that she didn't return her feelings because her own lay elsewhere, not because she doesn't like girls (which would go a ways to alleviate some of the uncomfortable framing of ilia being the psychotic lesbian in love with her straight best friend and trying to kill her about it). yang could have had a brief crush on a girl in their beacon days, or talked about past relationships, etc. there's no reason for blake to be the first and only person yang ever shows true interest in, especially since blake has an unambiguous romantic history (with adam and also with sun).

especially since this is a world where, ostensibly, homophobia doesn't exist. (at least according to word of god) it's also not like this was a network television cartoon where they had to worry about BS&P or sneaking things past the censors! there were no censors to worry about! so if this was being planned for an entire decade, why doesn't it show?

I'm not on twitter, but I did see those tweets when they made their way over here. For the record, I personally don't believe it. I hate saying that because I'm not someone who enjoys accusing someone else of lying, but as you've established above, there is nothing in the story to imply that this was a decade long endeavor. I mean that quite literally. Yang eyeing the shirtless guys, Blake's entire romance-coded arc with Sun, the rejection of Ilia, Adam framed as a potential ex, Yang never once showing an interest in other girls, the lack of explanation for why they won't confess (AKA an established, long-term arc about one or both of them discovering their sexuality, coming out, overcoming homophobia, working through another relationship first, etc.)... The Blake/Yang subtext began late post-reunion - which isn't a bad thing! But why in the world would you pretend that it was in the works 5-6 years earlier?

I mean, we know one potential reason why. Right now, there's a lot of uncharitable conversation surrounding how the romance is being used to prop up a struggling show. So if you're hoping to draw in more viewers through your work's queer rep, it helps to present that rep as a celebratory achievement after a decade of work. It makes RT appear to have always been progressive and worthy of your time/money. There never was a fear of queerbaiting because this was planned from the get-go. There are no problems with the romance's writing because we knew this was the end goal from day one. No, no, pay no attention to how our queer employees are treated. Why would you doubt our allyship when we strove for a decade to bring you a queer main couple? Noooo, also please ignore that nothing was stopping us from giving you that in Volume One. Good romance has to be earned, remember.

My tone in the last paragraph heavily implies that I've made up my mind regarding why we'd get this narrative of the bee's development, but the reality is that I just don't know. Obviously. I'm not in the writer's room, I'm not in their heads, I will never be able to provide irrefutable proof either for or against that interpretation. But given how RWBY was written and given what RT has to gain from acting like this was always the end game (which is a lot), I think the most charitable reading (if not necessarily the most likely one) is that RT is subconsciously stretching the definition of "planned." Do I believe that they sat down at the start of Volume One, decided that Blake and Yang would be a couple, and then somehow spectacularly failed to write that story for the better part of a decade? No. Do I think it's possible that, given the nature of fandom, RT immediately picked up on the fact that people instantly shipped Blake and Yang (because they were partners, complimentary, if you've been in fandom for longer than five minutes you know that splitting the RW and the BY is easy picking), maybe joked about them and WhiteRose being a thing, spent a couple of years writing safe het romances while testing the waters, realized after 6-ish years that providing serious queer rep would prove more helpful than harmful to the show, stayed in the ambiguous 'Are they friends or something more?' stage to further cover their bases, and then at a time when the company was at its most vulnerable, give the fans exactly what they wanted, capitalizing on the gratitude by thinking back to those initial days of joke-y what-ifs and going, "Yeah! This has been in the works since the very start! That'll help get us renewed, right? ;)"?

...Yeah.

Honestly, a part of me doesn't care. Queer rep is queer rep, regardless of how it came about, and a few years from now the drama of it all will have begun to fad. From here on out, newcomers to RWBY will never have to deal with that potential queerbaiting. They'll start and end the show knowing that the rep exists and, likely, won't give a damn how it came about. But for those who do want to unpack that motivation, I'm personally of the belief that RT is stretching (at best) the definition of "planning" in an effort to make the company look as good as possible during this time. People are welcome to call me pessimistic and overly critical if they'd like, but I think it's important to keep in mind that RT is a company. They're not a bunch of home-bound fans writing simply for the joy of it. They're also not an individual, safely established author who can push the boundaries of their craft without fear of (much) repercussion. They're a company. Their job is to make money and though that doesn't preclude them from creating amazing art and taking great pride in their work, at the end of the day 99% of the writing decisions are based around what will bring in more viewers. I'd caution anyone to think critically about a saluting emoji and a very simplistic summary of - what we know having lived through it - was a very complicated situation.

#rwde #rwby #mymetas

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thisismehappy · 1 year

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I need, for when they finally have their *conversation* for it to be long single takes. Few edits. Id prefer a bottle episode. Stuck somewhere. No choice but to talk it out. In the words of Abed from Community "They're wall-to-wall facial expression and emotional nuance"

Basically I want a play.

Do i want the script to have an outline and have M and C improv the rest? Also probably.

Sorry! I think this got buried in my notifications! I don't get very many asks and I just saw this in my inbox which I never usually look at.

This was a lot so I figured out how to add a cut. See below.

Generally, I'm not a *huge* fan of bottle episodes. Pragmatically speaking, bottle episodes serve a purpose in the TV industry as a low-budget episode because they only need to use one set for the whole episode and there are no location shots and relatively few actors and probably no extras. That puts a huge amount of pressure on the writing and the actors and it is, as you say, more of a play format which makes sense given everything I just mentioned. Most of the time they feel, to me, like the writers and production team are trying to *do* something in a way that as an audience member I don't actually want to be aware of. Like maybe they're swimming beyond their depth. It feels forced, is what I'm saying. Forced and itchy and uncomfortable and I find myself checking the time every 2 minutes waiting for it to end. So I almost never hope for a bottle episode.

BUT I have really liked Mariska's bottle episodes on SVU. I'm thinking specifically of Something Happened, Part 33, The Year We All Fell Down, and 911. None of which were perfect bottle episodes, as I recall, because they did have some movements to other sets and some location shooting and things like that. But any 43-minute show that has Mariska on my screen for 40 of those minutes is fine by me. And she tends to do really well with them. I get the feeling she enjoys the challenge and so she puts a lot of herself into them. She won a freaking Emmy for 911 after all. I also think if it was an EO episode, she would be so beyond focused on making it perfect bc this has been her dream really since day one imo. (There's a clip floating around if Chris giving an interview in season one and Mariska runs up and hugs him and says, "He's playing a detective that's in love with his partner," or something along those lines.) And I think Chris would be great at it too. So all that to say, I do think the actors are up to the challenge.

I worry about the writing a bit though. While I understand where you're coming from, I'm not sure I'd agree about them just ad-libbing it bc to me this is something that needs to be pretty carefully thought out with a clear understanding of the implications of the words and a pretty specific memory of the past events they're discussing and the actors are great, but they've been part of this for 24 years and aren't going to remember everything. Someone needs to go back and reference old episodes. If a bottle episode happens, I want that script to be *crackling* with subtext. I want to hear Elliot apologize for not being there and Olivia say, "I know you can't spend your life looking over your shoulder to make sure I'm okay." I want them sharing a drink. I want her to have to blink a light at him to show she's okay. I want him to ask if anyone's taking care of her. And I want him to cradle her in his arms like he did in fault and spooked. I don't expect all (or realistically any) of that too happen, but I think a carefully, beautifully written script would do this moment the most justice. Idk if the writers are up to that or not, but they've been showing us things this season that (mostly) give reason to hope.

The actual plot of a bottle episode is where I get tied up though. SVU is a police procedural above all else and every other bottle episode they've ever done has been related to solving the mystery of a case. An interrogation, a hostage situation, a mystery girl on a phone, and argument in a court house waiting room. These are what we've seen before and what we would expect to see from a show like SVU. An EO bottle episode is uncharted territory. Is there a case that's going to be taking up half the plot? I cannot imagine them really talking unless they were alone so that rules out most of what we've seen before. (Although, Olivia having to interrogate Elliot for a crime while half the department stands on the other side of the window does sound *delicious*.)

A court house argument could work, with the aspects of the case hitting *all* the wrong buttons for them, but it's been done before. Some kind of escape room type scenario could be really fun and interesting. Where they're trapped somewhere and need to solve a mystery to get out. That could be on point and very them, but unless it feels like life-and-death, idk if there would be enough of a driving force to get them where they need to be emotionally.

If I were going to write a fic about it, it would be a situation where they were maybe chasing a suspect or investigating a location and no one really knows exactly where they are and they get hurt and trapped somewhere. Personal preference, I would have her more hurt than him. I want it to be kinda enclosed so maybe it's triggering her claustrophobia (which she has if it's my fic). I want him to need to pull some of her clothes off to help with her injuries and find her scars from William Lewis. I want her to ask him to take Noah if she dies. I want him to be in serious pain from his own injuries but feral to save her. Maybe in the end, his recovery time is worse bc he does something stupid to get them out. I think the fear of death and of missing their chance to be together might be what it takes to make it finally happen. These two are very stubborn. If they were just trapped in a room together with no other problems idk if they'd get there. (Maybe, he's pretty motivated now, so that would help. But idk if he's going to push her too hard if she's really fighting him in it.)

Also, they're gonna kiss if it's my fic, and imo, their grievously-injured bodies are about the only thing I think would keep them from going all the way the first time they kiss. And I don't mind that either, but the idea of them finally being together, but having to wait 6-8 weeks to get medically cleared for sex sounds really fun. The first day in the hospital is very *serious* but the second day features them both trying to check out AMA and him hobbling his way into her room and making out with her in a hospital bed. They're going to get busted multiple times by different people. And yes, realistically they should be traumatized, but things worked out in the end and they've got the world's best security blankets. And I think even Liv's shrink would tell her to go for it.

#lol that was a lot #thank you for triggering my ramble #just thinking thoughts #olivia benson #elliot stabler #svu #law and order svu #asks #although i don't think you asked for that

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mikewheely · 2 years

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i just HATE the fact that people discredit mike’s feelings and often manipulate them into not even loving el but ACTUALLY having been in love with will the entire time… i hate twitter—it’s all i see there :c i have been muting and blocking accs.. and even if, and only IF, that were true (but i mean let’s be serious…), why do you want by*er together so incredibly bad that it would destroy el in the process? the guy she fell for was ACTUALLY in love with her brother the whole time. like…..why do people want that to be true? also, people can respond to that with “El’s existence or feelings shouldn’t surround mike…..blah blah blah” ok,, so how is that different than forcing mike and will into this corner that their characters are solely revolved around each other 🤨 i swear most of these people NEVER make any sense by regurgitating this shit. i’m sorry if i made absolutely no sense and i was just rambling. i felt like ranting because i think y’all would get what i’m trying to say

No, you made complete sense and I get it! They condradict themselves all the time. And also, I think most of those fans just watch ST because of their ship and for finding gay subtext. They would say they really care about Mike, and about Will, but they want El to die even though they know how much Mike loves her (they don't accept it though) and how much Will cares for his sister (like we saw in ST4).

I am sorry but if you want innocent people to die so that your ship can happen, that is really sad and messed up. You will hear a lot of terminologies from them like "representation", "queerbaiting" and all, and just see how all of those have been twisted by them to fit their narrative. Idk but is a person (who happens to be gay) being in love with another person who is already in a relationship, and him being unable to say it to that person is queerbaiting?! If you consider a straight relationship, even Steve's love is also unrequited. What about the fact that Will is scared, is just 14-15, IN THE 1980s, worried that it might ruin his friendship with Mike, his relationship with his sister El, and reveal is identity to everyone that he is not very comfortable with? So worried that he couldn't even say it to his brother? How about we give him some time? How about we consider the basic human emotions and see how heartbreaking it is before we jump to conclusions like it was 'queerbaiting', and that they are implying gay people don't deserve to be happy? They ignore Robin's storyline in the process, because, well, she is not a part of this ship. It's so sad when people reduce the emotions and struggles of a character to just a marketing tactic to attract LGBTQ audience. They won't see that he is struggling to accept it himself, they won't see the time period we are in, they won't see what scares him, that he cares about the feelings of people around him, and that he feels like he is a 'mistake'. All of these struggles and people are here like "oh god that was queerbaiting, let me write a Google doc on that." All they want is Mike and Will to be together. And many of them are just simply disgusting where they would reduce this to seeing them make out and wouldn't even mind sexualizing the whole thing. I'm so done. It's almost like pseudo supporters. Like they learnt some new things and they would apply it everywhere. Like the pseudofeminists who believe women should do ANYTHING to gain power, like 'using' others for their own benefit. It's the same for many of these people. Like no matter what, no matter how, what they want needs to happen, because THAT is true gay representation.

#mike wheeler #will byers

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drunkengodsofslaughter · 10 months

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People always cry we take Robin's agency that she just be allowed to date Nancy without problems and that she shouldn't care about Steve. Like they are the ones who completely take away Robin's agency. It's clear to me that Robin values Steve's friendship so much, by not making her care about Steve's feelings you take away so much from Robin's character. I genuinely think those people had no best friends. But what can you expect from people who can't even admit that Nancy played the bigger role in the breakup with Steve. Like Steve wasn't perfect, he couldn't be there for Nancy like she wanted but then she should not have strung him along for months. I'm not villainizing her it's literally in the show. She admits it herself and then doesn't take any accountability for it. Like I believe if Stancy talked it out, from Steve's side he would want to make it work. Nancy wasn't 100% in it from the beginning. Which is fine she doesn't have to love him just be honest with him. If Steve would have fucked the person Nancy was worried about two days after a huge fight, people would see it as cheating on his behalf. Like what is worse lying to your boyfriend that you love him since the beginning or not completely understanding your girlfriend's trauma because you deal with your own?

Or they constantly bring up his past mistakes that he's a bad person so Robin would have no problems leaving him. Like they argue Steve left Nancy wasted at the party when the subtext suggests he didn't because why should Jonathan lie about it. He loved Nancy and hated Steve why should he make him look better, plus he knew Steve was upset so it seems to me they had a little talk and Steve asked him to take her home. It would have been ooc for Steve to leave her there given he is a protective person, he would make sure she got home safely. This is the guy who doesn't want her to blow up the lab because it's dangerous if you think he would abandon her in that situation with no one to keep her safe you don't get his character. He just couldn't be with her because she hurt him. And it would have been ooc for Jonathan to lie about this. Jonathan is a no bullshit person he told Nancy what he thinks in s1 why not in that instance?

Or people still think Steve is homophobic because of s1, when he really owned up to everything. He literally exepted Robin with no problems. Or on the topic of slutshaming, he never expected Nancy to forgive him he wanted to make it up to her. She also took a month to overthink and then gave him a chance. If she can forgive Jonathan why is Steve the exeption? And to use this as a reason for the breakup is just arguing in bad faith. Like why would she date him if she can't forgive him?

Or they use Robin as a person who hated Steve in highschool for his ways when in reality she only disliked him because she was jealous. There was no indication he was a bully to her. Stop using Robin for anti Steve agenda she will pick him over everything. If you want Steve people stop talking about Nancy maybe don't make her fuck his best friend??? Again I hated my best friend's exes for less. Even if my bff made mistakes I still hated the exes for theirs and Nancy made mistakes so big in that relationship Robin wouldn't be cool.

okay so gonna put some of this under read more cuz it’s kind of long

please the amount of times i’ve seen them completely just throw robin’s absence away is insane like idk they’re all crazy about us doing it when honestly we’re the ones to constantly give robin her own storyline and give her deeper thought about her family and actually give her a family who does love her no matter what. god yeah people who think that robin just is going to say ‘fuck steve’ just don’t understand her character at all. also she has a deep connection with steve and this friendship is still relatively new (people forget that they’ve only actually been friends for not even a year - they started being friends in july and then in march of the next year they are still close) so idk why people just want robin to betray steve and then make everything okay. it’s just weird. god everything in this paragraph is a fucking banger.

honestly people who are still bitter about steve in season 1 just are projecting their own experiences with their bullies and making steve seem like a bigger bully then what we actually see in canon which is him just living in his own bubble and reacting to the things around him. like people can’t understand this but steve in season 1 is just reacting to the events that are going on around him and that’s honestly it. steve isn’t going out of his way to target nancy or jonathan - he’s just reacting to the possibility that nancy cheated on him with jonathan (which is wild how canon just did this anyway and then made it seem like steve should just lie down on the floor and take it). i didn’t even think about that but yeah it would have been soo OOC for jonathan to lie about it especially about steve who he admitted in season 1 that he didn’t like steve. genuinely why would he lie for steve?

i fucking hate everyone being like ‘he’s homophobic’ because the thing is was he really? he just said one word that people just threw around back then - not saying that it’s right. but people use that one like to say steve is homophobic but we never actually get an opinion on what he believes. also like hopper has said worse shit than steve and hopper is seen as this amazing alley to byler (which ironically bylers are always the ones to say this sjit about steve) but yeah like it’s insane that they clutch onto that one line vs steve in season 3 and 4 bejng the most welcoming person to robin and encouraging her to pursue someone when they both think vickie is a safe person to be open and have a crush on. honestly yeah about the nancy forgave him like she had to do that on her own. do i think it’s wild she got together with him after that? yes! but also she does that in canon. also my two cents but sometimes people get caught up on this slut shaming for no reason cuz nancy fr slutshames other women and it’s no big deal to anyone.

legit robin would hate the fact that people use this as anti steve slander. like you said robin only really hated steve because of her own shit and she was jealous. like steve doesn’t know robin exists - why do people think he would know she exists prior canon (unless it’s for an au or just a slight mention of robin where steve forgets who she is)? honestly it’s just so frustrating how people can see stobin’s friendship and then be like ‘okay i’m going to destroy everything about this friendship but the people who like stobin go to far because they lost this friendship’. legit people be like why you talking about steve but then immediately give robin his ex and think they’re being progressive or some shit. also like i don’t even think ronance would make it work by themselves, steve is just the cherry on top of why i don’t think they would romantically be together so it’s not even like i just hate them cuz of the ex thing - i just don’t think their personalities work well at all. also nancy is legit kn a relationship with jonathan and does not at all have a queer plot line in canon (that’s all fanon).

#answered asks #stranger things #thanks

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xomby · 2 years

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I am going to be predictable and ask you 003 for Yates, but also, just to spice things up - 003 for Jo as well <3

OK EHEHEHEE be prepared this might be super long.

yates-

how i feel about this character- yates is my everything. he’s so funny and so sad and so relatable i genuinely can’t put into words how much i care about him. i project onto him really hard he’s legitimately just ogh. oughg

romantic ships- really just benton tbh, i think they really have a great dynamic that’s a perfect mix of genuinely healthy and hilarious banter, earnest care for one another, and gut wrenching angst. one of my fav things about them is how much they say without actually saying anything. right from the get go (honestly forget which episode it’s in but one of yates’ first) he’s missing and unit doesn’t know where he is, and benton asks the brig and there’s such deep worry in his voice and eyes idk. i was sold from that point on. there’s many other moments i could talk about but yeah they’re so fucking good and a really interesting show of two characters who clearly care about each other but are not able to adequately express it in their work setting imo. also i have a theory that the tom yates is dating in PROSE happy endings is tommy from planet of the spiders just cause it seems like the truth to me and they’re ok but not like benton/yates.

fav nonromantic relationship- YATES AND JO. you know this. i’m so insane about them they have such a close loving friendship it’s so cute. they’re almost dating but he’s gay so they’re not dating it’s really real. they care about each other so much i’m obsessed with them. also such a small moment but when jo checks the time on yates’ wristwatch in the dæmons. it’s so cute they function as 1 entity sometimes

unpopular opinion- i don’t know if enough people care about yates for there to be popular/unpopular opinions about him tbh. that being said maybe that i absolutely see where he’s coming from with the operation golden age thing. like being not-fully-recovered from violently painful and traumatic brainwashing and being approached by a group claiming to be trying to save the environment, anyone would do what he did imo. also the fact that he was fully prepared to die, maybe even expecting it, maybe even wanting it, makes it really hard for me to understand how people see him as a heartless villain in that scenario. like nah bruh

something i wish had happened in canon- i guess maybe just more content. even when he played a major role in stories, he didn’t get much screentime, and his struggles were very infrequently focused on. i would have liked to see a bit more care put into the depth of his character (in an overt sense, cause it’s definitely there in subtext/implications/throwaway lines)

crossover ship- tbh i don’t do crossover ships, i just don’t get it

jo-

how i feel about this character- MY FUCKING GIRL. jo. jo. god. she’s genuinely my everything, and my second fav doctor who character closely after yates. it takes another kind of likability for an entire episode to basically come down to jo being such a loving and selfless person that her pure kindness destroys the sci-fi equivalent of the devil. she’s just so fucking good. also it’s hilarious how dumb she is but it still doesn’t dictate her character. yes she’s stupid, but that’s a trait that’s sometimes good, sometimes bad. she has other traits and skills that balance it out. she’s pretty much the world to me.

romantic ships- ok they never met but i’ve always loved the idea of jo and liz. i think their personalities really balance out perfectly, and they’d have a hilarious and adorable dynamic- jo being very forward and openly sweet and liz sort of being out of touch and closed off, trying not to let her feelings show. i also kind of like cliff and jo. i hated it initially cause her exit is so… 😕 like it is in character for her to marry a guy she just met but idk how i feel about her dropping everything and leaving all her friends for his scientific endeavors, it seems out of character. however, i think they’re funny together and i love the idea that everyone at unit hates cliff.

fav nonromantic relationships- YATES AND JO AGAIN!!!! but since i already talked about it it’s also worth mentioning jo and benton, who are just fucking adorable friends (especially in the three doctors, hugging and holding hands when they’re nervous, it’s so cute and silly). also jo and the doctor are the father daughter dynamic of a lifetime and the scene in time monster when they’re in jail and he tells her the story of how he started seeing the world in color has made me cry before.

unpopular opinion- again idk how many opinions i know. i think a popular hc is that she’s a lesbian which is so unreal to me she’s the most bisexual character of all time. BUT that’s a very little one that i don’t really have that strong feelings about. i guess people often think she’s sort of a typical damsel-type companion which is so far from true, she’s such a whole character with such a fleshed out personality with strengths, weaknesses, interests, and feelings. i will never understand the argument that jo is a weak character.

something i wish had happened in canon- honestly i thought she was a really well done character with great relationships with everyone she interacted with. i genuinely think the only thing that could really improve the viewing experience when it comes to jo is a couple more seasons tbh, although i completely get and respect manning not wanting to do the show anymore after delgado passed away

crossover ship- again. maybe i’m missing something but i don’t really get it

#IM SORRY THIS IS SO LONG I FUCKING LOVE THEM SM #god the brainrot #doctor who #ask #mike yates #jo grant

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rev3rb · 2 years

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Hello again! Idk about you, but I’m left feeling kinda pleasant/neutral about this chp. I honestly didn’t expect much clarity, so hopefully the next will live up to this ending’s promise.

There were some cute moments tho. I enjoyed the parallel between Guren calling for Mahito and Yu calling for Mika. And the split panel of Mika & Shinoa watching Yu. As well as the extra dose of gay that was Mahiru bringing up Shinya’s admiration for Guren (they really aren’t slick with the queer subtext at this point). Plus I always love seeing Krul, Ferid, & Crowley interact, even if it does kind of have that bittersweet tone to it.

The ending was sweet, but I’m kinda iffy on the whole forgiveness thing though like… maybe we should hold off on that until Guren actually comes through in resurrecting the thousands of ppl he promised to 🤨. Call me cold or whatever, but I believe in cutting family members off for things such as murdering your childhood family. I get that relationships can be complex and if everything works out in the end, fine I guess. But unless that happens, me personally, I’d be holding revenge in the back of my mind at all times. I would not be afraid to go out with hate in my heart 😌

What do you think about this release?

Hello Anon!

I'm glad to hear that you're feeling neutral/pleasant with this chapter. I saw a lot of hate for this chapter from a large portion of the community before the chapter dropped and while I didn't really read any of it since I don't read leaks, it left me worried. I understand why some people don't like the chapter though, but I'll get into that in a bit. Yeah, it's not surprising that we'll have to wait another chapter before we get answers. I'm pretty sure last time I said we should start getting some answers, but we were always going to have to wait for this fight to wrap up before that happened so idk what I was thinking lol.

Yeah! It was actually the small character moments that make me like this chapter a lot. I love that Yuu's just out there headbutting Guren while everyone watches. It made me laugh imagining it play out in real time. The things I really liked though were on Guren's end and the vampires. It's interesting to see how Mahiru's changed. I don't think it really marks a progression in her character necessarily, but up until this point, she's always semi, or straight up mocked Guren for his weakness even though she, as she says, likes that about him. Here she's supporting him. You could swap Mahiru out with Shinya and not change the lines and it would fit perfectly. On that note, I do love that Mahiru mentions Shinya because their admiration really does stem from the same place. It's why they understand each other so well back in C@16. Also yeah, as you mention, we gotta have that subtext. Love to see it. But I digress. On top of all that, Guren looking at Yuu squad and seeing his own friends is just perfect. It hurts (me at least) and is bittersweet. Krul, Ferid, and Crowley were just perfect. I love seeing nigh immortal characters getting beheaded for humor reasons. Always funny, and I've honestly quite missed Ferid's "nothing in life matters :)))" attitude. He really is out here like "haha I've been alone all my life :D". It does have that bittersweet feeling to it like you said. I hope we get to see more of them interacting as we go forward.

Another small thing I wanted to mention before we move into the bulk of what I wanted to briefly talk about is the return of magic. Not going to lie, I often forget that there's this whole realm of rarely tapped on power (as in ability, not strength) in OnS while reading Vampire Reign. It gets used so infrequently since demon weapons are just so much better. I love to see it make a return for trickier tactics like this.

Okay but with all that out of the way let's get into the biggest problem with this chapter, Yuu's forgiving Guren. Again, I didn't read all the posts bc spoilers, but from what little bits I gleaned before I figured out they were spoilers, people's big dislike is Yuu forgiving Guren easily. I get it! It's unrealistic for a normal person. As you say, I'm quite sure everyone reading would hold a grudge against Guren. I would too, but here's the thing. For Yuu it makes perfect sense. It's consistent with his character. Did we forget how Guren killed Mika, and Yuu was perfectly fine with forgiving him once he learned that Mika could be saved? Did we forget how Yuu (indirectly) forgave Ferid and is willing to work with him because he learned that there's a way to bring his old family back? Not only that, but Guren is one of the most important people in Guren's life, and Yuu is WILDLY sympathetic towards him because of that. Guren's whole motivation is protecting the ones he loves, even if he has to hurt them (much as he hates that) to do it. Yuu is really the same way. Guren sort of instilled that ideology in Yuu (I ish have a meta on that here if anyone is interested in hearing more about that). They parallel each other in that regard (and a lot of others) and because of that, Yuu understands Guren more than a lot of other characters. Yuu can see where Guren comes from even if he doesn't agree with it. I won't delve into it too deeply here because of length reasons, but there's a disconnect between what Yuu, our protagonist, would do bc he feels is right and what we the audience would want, bc we feel it's right, and it's been there a while. That's not great, but it's not like it's a sudden thing this chapter. But anyway, for that reason, personally, I'm okay with it, even if it is, again, unrealistic. Do I love it? No, but I didn't expect any different. I don't fault anyone for disliking it though.

Edit: It seems people didn’t dislike it as much as I was thinking. It was just twitter lol

#Owari no Seraph #OnS 112 #OnS 112 spoilers #Anonysis Asks #Asks #My posts #I honestly thought this post would be longer #but I was able to be relatively concise which is a relief

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tolbyccia · 3 years

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I’m writing a fic and my beta told me that Ann is smarter than people like you say and now I’m confused. IDK WHAT TO BELIEVE ANYMORE BECAUSE I’M WRITING AN AU AND STILL AT THE FIRST ARC!

i mean... i feel like this is something that you can remedy by revisiting her sections of the game, like her confidant and other major story beats? i'd do what you can to build her characterization for your fic around your intuition of what the game tells you about her moreso than what fanon says. your message is worded a bit confusingly; i can't tell whether youre saying that your beta believes i think ann is dumb or that she's smart, but my own handling of her has always been based in the fact that she's extremely emotionally intelligent with other vulnerable characters and has a lot of sensibility to how she moves through situations, so i definitely wouldn't call her dumb as an all encompassing character trait.

she's proficient at multiple languages, communication as a whole, reading a room, breaking down subtext, and living self sufficiently. she's canonically not an honor student, though she is good at english, and when in the presence of other teenagers is prone to have 16-year-old-typical moments of silly lapses in logic that are fun to joke about when making lighthearted fan content. she has a well thought out code of ethics and is willing to pause and reconsider her own views when challenged which also takes a lot of intellectual maturity. these are all just canonical things she shows throughout the game.

i think if youre stumped on how to write her in your au, moreso than worrying about fanon interpretation including my handling on ann, it would be a good idea to figure out her role in the narrative youre writing and whether her canon roles support that or need to be refigured. best of luck working on your fic.

#i know you didnt mean for this message to come off this way but #it feels as though youre putting the responsibility for whether your ann is ooc or not on me? which is kind of uncomfortable.#im just sitting here. im just some guy #jayatalks

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lovely-v · 3 years

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LOTR (films) Review

So I finally watched the LOTR films (20 years later). I’m super excited to review these because I read the books very recently so I feel at least a little prepared to voice some opinions. Overall I loved the films, here’s a very long (but by no means exhaustive) compilation of my thoughts, which are of course, totally subjective:

(Warning: a lot of me saying “well, actually, in the book...”)

THINGS I LIKED

- Casting! not much to say here, I thought the casting was great. One of my favorite actors that I didn’t think i’d have a huge opinion on was David Wenham as Faramir. I was kinda ambivalent on him when I saw pictures but i thought he did a great job. he showed his quality.

- Music. so much has been said about the films on the music front. I can’t offer too much original insight but when a bit of the Shire theme started to play as Frodo tries to make his way up Mount Doom I cried a little.

- Boromir and Aragorn. I liked the scene where they interact a little in Rivendell. I also like how Aragorn saves Boromir in the Moria battle and gives him this little nod of friendship. I think the films did a great job portraying the dynamic they have where Aragorn is clearly suspicious of Boromir’s motivations but grows to respect him to the point where he doesn’t even blame Boromir for being corrupted by the ring because he understands that, at heart, Boromir is a good person.

- Sam and Frodo in Osgiliath. I expected to be kind of annoyed with the way this plot point played out (I knew ahead of time that it strayed from the book), but I actually liked it a lot. As I’ll say later, there’s some gripes I have with the way the films extremely play up the disagreements between Frodo and Sam, but I loved the scene where Frodo pulls the sword on Sam and then seems so defeated when he realizes what he’s done. I was pleasantly surprised by how emotional this scene made me. It’s admittedly A Lot, but it was done nicely, especially in conjunction with Sam’s “there’s good in this world” speech.

- Treatment of the ending. I almost think I should dislike the ending as it is in the movies, but my heart is soft and I like that they sugarcoated it a bit. I know the whole point of the Scouring of the Shire and Frodo’s depression conveys a lot about war and trauma and I think that is important, but after watching these things for twelve hours I just wanted Frodo & co. to be happy and I was kinda relieved that they cut the Scouring. Does that make me weak and perhaps bad at film analysis? yes. do I care? no. I was also very glad that the movies didn’t portray how depressed Sam was about losing Frodo in the end. Yes, he cries, but when he walks home to his family he seems happy and in the books that scene came off so much bleaker. I definitely liked the lighter tone.

THINGS I WAS NEUTRAL ON/DIDN’T LIKE

- Arwen. (Neutral) I don’t hate her, I don’t love her. I think the story she and Aragorn have is compelling and I 100% get why the filmmakers decided to add it to give her character more depth, but it felt misplaced at times. maybe it’s just because it was the only storyline I didn’t know in depth, but the scenes with the Arwen/Aragorn flashbacks felt a bit confusing and disorienting. Don’t have anything against Arwen as a character though, I think she’s pretty alright.

- Gimli. (Complicated thoughts) I want to start off by saying I don’t dislike Gimli. I like him a lot! I just think the movies did him a bit dirty. He had some good movie-exclusive moments, but I think his character really fell into this place of being the butt of too many jokes. Would have liked to see some more serious Gimli development, especially with his relationship to Legolas. Their friendship felt too much like subtext here, whereas it’s explored far more in the books.

- Two Towers Pacing. (Didn’t really like). The pacing of TTT was...weird. maybe I’m going into this with a closed mind because of the books, but it was odd to have the movie begin with Frodo and Sam and then have them only appear for a few rapid scenes after that. I think the fact that a WHOLE LOT of what happens to Frodo and Sam in TTT is moved to RotK is what makes it feel that way? In the books, Two Towers ends with Sam discovering that Frodo isn’t dead from Shelob’s sting, and I was surprised by how long it took the movies to get to that part. However, I will give the films a little leeway because I think they needed Frodo & Sam content for RotK, since most of what happens in that book is them walking through Mordor basically starving and dying. Doesn’t make for great cinema I guess, so they had to put the whole Shelob/Cirith Ungol saga into the final film. Still, I think there’s a weird lack of Frodo and Sam’s presence in TTT.

- The go home/missing bread arc. (Full of rage abt this one) yeah. so. my criticism of this is gonna sound pretty tired because people complain and complain about this part of RotK. but I’m gonna complain some more!! I don’t think the split between Frodo and Sam does anything for the plot. I really don’t. I guess it emphasizes the fact that Sam doesn’t understand how much Frodo is projecting onto Gollum, but it’s just. unnecessary angst? They had enough angst in the Osgiliath scene! Which I actually liked! And it simply doesn’t make a lot of sense for Frodo to suspect Sam of eating the bread when Sam had already offered Frodo his own food and made it clear that he would very much starve if it meant making sure Frodo could eat. But what I hate most about this scene is not that Frodo gets mad and tells Sam to go home. No. It’s that Sam actually... thinks about doing that? he actually? goes down the staircase? emotionally this is bad because Sam clearly cared enough about Frodo to follow him this far, to nearly drown for him, so why would he leave now. Practically this is bad because 1. how would Sam get out of Mordor alone and 2. where would he go. He turns around almost immediately, yes, but what was his plan. where was he going. why.

THINGS I LOVED

- For Frodo! This line, and every other shoutout to Frodo. In the books, they didn’t really actively talk about/worry about Frodo (and Sam) as much as they do in the movies. I like that they talk about Frodo more in the movies! I like that they’re thinking about him! I know it was implied that they were in the books, but I really like how it’s shown here. I think it gave a more complete picture of how much they all care about him on a personal level in addition to just needing him to succeed from a pragmatic standpoint.

- Merry and Pippin! I feel like Merry and Pippin were so well rounded in the films. I’ve heard criticism about them being turned into comic relief characters (which they always were a little bit) but it honestly didn’t feel that way to me. They had a bit of a rough start because the films didn’t make their motives for going with Frodo as deep as the books did, but I think that by TTT they were absolutely amazing characters in every scene. In RotK their respective arcs hit really well and the scene where Pippin is singing to Denethor? *chef’s kiss* poetic. beautiful. sad. idk man I just feel like I have such a newfound appreciation for Merry and Pippin.

- Parallels! people have pointed out the parallel of Frodo and Sam’s hands before (drowning scene/mount doom scene) and I love how the movie did that. Just stunning. Also! The moving of the Smeagol & Deagol scene to RotK surprised me because in the books it was like,,,at the beginning of Fellowship, but I think the placement of it in the movies really helped emphasize the similarities between Smeagol & Deagol and Frodo & Sam (and how much Frodo fears this similarity.) There were a lot of other well done parallels between storylines and a few bits of dialogue that were repeated with great timing, but I can’t remember all of them at the moment.

Edit: here’s one I remembered! when Frodo wakes up after being rescued and sees Gandalf, he says Gandalf’s name in a very similar tone to the one he used at the very beginning of Fellowship. It was a nice little subtle connection.

- I can’t carry it for you...alright this is self-indulgent. everyone knows I love this line. I’m just so glad it made it into the movie intact. Sean Astin’s delivery was amazing. I cheered. My mom cheered. It’s a raw line and it makes me feel secret emotions...like if shrimp colors were feelings. that line makes me feel shrimp feelings. idk i’m so tired i just watched twelve hours of movies this review is decreasing in quality by the minute but i’m about done for now anyway

Various silly afterthoughts

- I would have liked to see Sam kiss Frodo’s hands at least once. This happens 50 thousand times in the books, they could have given me one scene. one little extended edition scene. Please Peter Jackson I’m dyin’ out here

- They literally made Gollum so hateable. kinda the point yes, but I was so on board with Sam’s murderous rage. I know why Gollum’s a profoundly complex character, I know why Frodo pities him, I know why murder is bad, but I too would throw hands with that creature. also he literally body shamed Sam so much what was that skdjksdjksd. Sam is lovely. let him commit a small homicide.

- the scene where merry and pippin drink the tall boy juice (as someone once referred to it in the tags of one of my posts)... not accurate to the books (since they don’t ever drink it with the end goal of getting tall) but so accurate to life. if I found some water that made me taller than my friends? let me at it

- Frodo panicking when he falls into the spider webs. so real bestie. i felt just as panicked watching that. i am terrified of spiders and Elijah Wood did an amazing job doing exactly what i’d do in the situation. yelping a lot and falling down.

- I feel like it’s never stated that Sam’s a gardener (or at least that he’s specifically Frodo’s gardener) until he tells Faramir he is. Did I miss this. Or do they really never say. are you just meant to know. are you just meant to pick up gardener vibes from him.

This has been a very chaotic lotr movie review. Thanks for reading.

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relaxxattack · 3 years

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I find it really weird how people jumped on c!niki. like I get being frustrated with a character having a warped perception of another character, especially with said character being so beloved, and I get being worried about the fandom perception but like, the way everyone immediately jumped into being a c!wilbur defense squad is? weird to me? kind of? like, c!niki is literally spiralling again and said some really worrying stuff about her herself (crossing into self-harm territory even), we all know how deeply she's affected by wilbur (her seeing ghostbur and then having a near-breakdown is a good moment that shows that for example), she feels hurt so deeply, a betrayal so scarring for her (and we're NOT talking about validity of the word "betrayal" here, it's not about that). It's just weird for me this kinda, lack of empathy towards her. it's like people saw this character that yes has her faults but is so clearly, deeply hurt (and literally spiralling again) and went "okay but what does this mean for wilbur though 🤔" - and i am a c!wilbur apologist btw, we know about his motivations and how destruction of l'manberg was a tragic and selfless act in truth - but some characters don't know that, and are allowed to feel hurt and betrayed by it, it's weird, idk, usually I'd be right with the fandom but the way everyone immediately jumped on c!niki in this very cold fashion is ???????

i understand what you feel and don’t really have the brain power to intelligently respond, and honestly, ive just been reblogging posts that made sense to me.

tbh i was going to post abt the self harm thing (because what the fuck) but it was in the middle of the vod and niki then went on to keep talking which, as you could understand, made me think about what she was saying. ig its just a sort of human nature to defend someone

but also, i think most people are just really tired of the villian wilbur thing. it’s been here for so so long... literally eight months. they’re tired of it, and they’re especially tired of hearing the fandom hate on him to no end. this was a breaking point because of how much was said abt him that simply wasn’t true

also c!niki has a history of placing all blame on a single person, usually in an unfair way

there’s also a matter of debating subtext... “niki is upset and hurt” is obvious. like, everyone who watched the stream would understand that. “niki is traumatized and fucked up” isn’t like, a new or controversial statement— it’s something we just saw happen

“what niki is saying about wilbur isn’t actually true” is a very diferent thing because you wouldn’t know that unless you watched season one. and a LOT of this fandom didn’t watch season one, they take wilburs words of villainy as gospel. that’s why so many people feel the need to clarify it i think.

(none of the above made much sense, and i also have a lot more thoughts on the subject, but im tired, so i think ill go watch ranboo play life is strange lol)

#discourse #critical #tw self harm

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theamityelf · 3 years

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I do think that Mal operates on sort of a Caillou level of wish fulfillment, where she provides comfort to (not exclusively, but I think particularly) white girls in the same way Caillou provides comfort to small children, by telling them, “You don’t have to be considerate or good; you can just indiscriminately follow the compulsions of your frustration and your anger and your feelings of powerlessness, and no matter the collateral damage, everyone in your life will fall over themselves to accommodate you.” There’s an audience for that (obviously), and I won’t form a moral judgement about it per se; it makes me uncomfortable, in the same way I can’t enjoy x Reader when the reader is mean or prejudiced, but idk what some people need to work through. I’m not a psychologist.

I think there’s a singularly racial aspect to it, though, that I find it difficult not to see. The narrative around Mal really seems to pander to this idea of “People of color will fall at your feet, and you can use your sheer girlboss power to reach the same level of authority as the White Man (and control him as you please). Don’t worry, your colored friends don’t have lives outside of you, and you can betray and disappoint them as much as you want because their feelings matter less than yours; earning forgiveness is effortless.” (Especially the way some Mal stans tend to deflect criticism for Mal’s behavior by bringing up her past with her mom seems reminiscent of using sexism against white women to deflect accusations of bad behavior.)

Mal’s personal problems always manage to take the shape of saving Auradon; everything that gives her emotional baggage is a life and death thing (as much as it can be, on Disney Channel) that all of the characters are invested in dealing with. It isn’t Carlos’s mom who’s threatening Auradon; it’s Mal’s, so Carlos’s feelings about his abusive past don’t get to be physically defeated by the group at large. Mal saves the day by herself only in the sense that she’s positioned to take all the credit for saving the day; the narrative never actually makes her carry any burden alone except for her own guilt. No one else’s problems are centered like hers; Evie and Jay and Carlos are expected to deal with their story arcs on their own time. When Evie does take time out of what everyone is doing to agonize over one of her own problems ( “One Kiss”), the subtext of the entire scene is that she needs to hurry it up and get over herself. Contrast this with the gravity given to Mal’s relationship drama by every character.

And of course, Mal is allowed to define goodness, in that a character is good when they’re allied with Mal, even if the things they do are terrible (Beast, Belle, Fairy Godmother), and they’re evil if they’re against Mal, even if the things they do are good or at least well-intentioned (Uma). The ones who Mal wrongs are in the wrong for thinking badly of her, and anyone who fails to wordlessly identify and tend to her emotional wounds is expected to go very far out of their way to rectify that. All of this would be very appealing wish fulfillment, for a teenage girl and especially an apolitical teenage white girl.

#disney descendants #not exactly anti #just analytical #mal bertha #analysis

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normal-thoughts-official · 3 years

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Different anon here but also the fact that there's quiye a lot of slutshaming in the show, and against both Izzy and Magnus. I always read the hesitance of I'm scared to sleep with Alec in case that's all he wants? Like because Magnus has such a long list of sexual partners Alec might consider sex to be more important to Magnus than an actual emotional relationship. Or even a worry that Alec thinks Magnus is easy or smth. Idk especially since Magnus has lived so long and obviously evil camille, unlearning slutshaming even towards urself can potentially take time. I'm not sure if I was completely off or if I just missed the subtext with camille but id love ur thoughts xoxox

i do agree with you! i absolutely think it's a fear that's all alec wants thing. not because alec is that type, i think magnus knows that, but i think he has internalized that that's all he's good for

like to be more specific with what i hc with camille i just get the impression that with camille he was always begging for scrapes of her love/affection, and i think the easiest way to get that would be through sex, because well, sex involves touching and intimacy. and it never quite satisfied him because the affection was still not there but it was the closest he could get. but also, sex was 100% About Camille, not about him, so if he said no to something she wanted or just generally didn't make it all about her it would be ruined, and the affection withdrawal would be even worse. so, in that sense, i think sex was something that magnus started to understand as his gateway to being loved, IF he "earned" it. not consciously, but subconsciously, as he started to internalize more and more of camille's fucked up logic

and then AFTER camille he closed off completely to romantic relationships, and also, from what i've seen, pulled away from his friends a little bit. so after that, casual sex was basically his main sort of touch and intimacy, because he drove himself away from any other kind. which helps further cement the idea that being sexually appealing = earning affection in his subconscious

(which is NOT to say that everyone who has lots of casual sex is really just a traumatized person looking for love, btw. most ppl who have lots of casual sex just want casual sex and that is valid. and i think magnus has always been the casual sex type, which is great for him. it's just that the specific context made it gain connotations that weren't good after the sexual trauma he went through)

so when alec wants to have sex he is nervous because it feels almost like a test, especially after camille. like if he fucks this up, he will lose alec. maybe not in the sense of a breakup, but maybe in the sense that his loving caring boyfriend will be disappointed in him and see that he's not good enough

which again! i don't think is in any way conscious or that this is genuinely how magnus sees alec. but trauma fucks you up

i don't think that was a slutshamey plotline, tho. i actually kind of think it's the opposite, because the "slut" was insecure and the "virgin" was confident (i hate reducing either of them to these archetypes but it's why it's a trope subversion), and also because it actually tackled how slut shaming makes a person feel insecure when it comes to non-casual sex; because slut shaming convinces people that if you are good for casual sex, that's all you're good for, and you have to be absolutely perfect

like not to give shadowhunters too much credit or anything cuz i don't think they intended it to but this particular thing was actually something i think they did right (then they immediately ruined it with the "resolution" because of course they did)

which is not to say that sh isn't slutshamey af, because we all know that izzy's sole personality trait was "being sexy" (and ~exotic~), but, u know

hope that makes it clear what i meant? doaijdsa

#ask #anonymous #anti sh #abuse tw #dirty mention #sh #malec #magnus bane #magnus bane meta #meta

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akvtsuki-ari · 4 years

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Semantics

Warnings: dom!spencer, sub!reader, choking, throatfucking, dirty talk, fucking through clothes, humiliation/degradation

Length: 5.4k

Authors Note: idk how to explain the plot of this fic all that well but i hope yall like this! by the way, the two positions Spencer puts you in is the prison guard position and the pole positon, in that order i spent some time on it and i hope yall like it lmfaosjdkh

Plot Summary: You and Spencer could date other people but you both knew that it wouldn’t matter in the end.

There are few things to consider as a universal truth but some things just are. An example of that is here ;the only difference between fucking and making love were semantics. Most things in life are - semantics being the study of meaning in linguistics . As far as our universe knows, sex is an act born only out of necessity and frustration. The need to have sex to make life or the need to have sex because your body was responding to its urges and desires, aka frustration

Maybe in a lot of ways, your need to frustrate Spencer was innate to your humanity. An urge that speaks from generations past. It’s hard to say for sure why it’s happened but you both know how - it’s what has both of you in the place you are now.

Several months ago you and Spencer started hooking up. Casual sex and late night conversation at best, before life picked up any remaining free time and the both of you returned to back to reality. It was a stress reliever, a good time with no strings attached and no stakes involved. You wanted it that way and so did he - but shit always changes. Even when things aren’t supposed to be so complicated they are - because it’s almost inevitable that someone is going to catch feelings. Someone is going to feel something out for the other person or hell - someone else and things are just bound to get sticky and tangled. That’s the nature of casual endeavors - they’re designed to be ephemeral so when the date passes it all becomes complicated. Scintilla, a spark that passes through cold air and then disappears. That’s what hook-ups are intended for but you and Spencer just never figured out how to follow the rules. Neither of you were good at that.

It’s unclear who broke them first - whether your feelings of jealousy were the catalyst for what becomes of both of you. Was it Spencer for indulging her? Was it Spencer’s fault for whispering sweet nothings in her neck when he knew when you were watching? Or was it yours for retaliating? Too stubborn in your own regard to let him win. Spencer wasn’t really one for mind games of this kind but he couldn’t control himself it seemed like. It’s hard to say who started it - two parties indulging in lust-driven pettiness.

Her name started with an S, but you always managed to forget it. She was pretty, eyes low and so interested in Spencer. Her hands would wrap around his shoulders, resting her head on them when he was looking away. She’d drape herself over him at any chance and Spencer would whisper sweet-nothings to her. Laugh with her and look to you, eyes not full of challenge but faux neutrality. Spencer’s neck would always crane to look at her with surprise but you knew better.

It bothered you for a while, but who were you to be caught in a love triangle? He’s the one who had to live with it, after all - every time he was in-between your legs, he’d know she was never you. Still - you weren’t one to give up so quickly and Spencer was waiting on it. Check in 3 moves, your turn.

Imitation is the biggest form of flattery so when you walked into the function with a man on your hip - he wasn’t surprised. He watched the man who followed you in, the way his eyes were all over you. The way you sat on his lap, giving him all your time and attention - stroking his ego just because. You’d giggle at the shared promises, the feeling of his hands on your back. He was gentlemanly with you, carefully paying attention to you and no one else. He was handsome enough to get approached but he’d show disinterest before returning to you. He was moth to flame, but who was surprised? A woman as beautiful as you could do less to achieve that and you just happened to be so much more.

Every work function of any scale, your plus ones would follow you in as you and Spencer would speak to each-other in careful language. It was subtlety that was key because the two of you were the only people who knew that this was happening. It was behind the scenes a love story born of shadows, if you could call it that at all.

Penelope’s Christmas party was the beginning of the end, really.

“How’s Tyler?,” Spencer’s voice is minimal. You were impressed that he managed a name. He looks at you as you pour a glass of wine and you look back, flashing him a smile.

”He’s good. In the other room talking to Rossi and Tara about cars, I think,” you explain softly, wistfully. Spencer looks at the way you talk about him and a part of him seethes. Always does.

“How’s Sarah?,” you ask warmly. You bite your tongue as you talk but it’s killing you. He looks at you, brows quirked smiling back.

“She’s good. Her and Penelope are talking about cats,” Spencer laughs warmly. You hate the way he sounds about it. You want nothing more than to argue with him.

Speak of the devil, you figure. Sarah walks towards Spencer, immediately wrapping herself around Spencer’s side. She whispers something in Spencer’s ear and he smiles, whispering something back before looking to you, eyes full of challenge. You don’t say anything, smiling back at him before you sit up on the kitchen counter. Spencer watches as your skirt hiked up - the garter around your thigh making him... distracted. You just look at him for a second, looking into his expression before getting irritated.

Tyler walks in soon after and you give him a small smile. Sarah is quick to say hello to him and he returns it with ease. He’s polite, always is.

“You ready to go Y/N,” He asks kindly. You give him a grin, wrapping arms around his neck and drawing him in, burying your face in his neck before nodding. He laughs for a second and looks at you as you lift yourself up.

“Weirdo,” he jokes. You scrunch your expression up at him before looking at Spencer. His jaw is tight - you win.

“We’re gonna hit the hay, y’all, I’ll see you tomorrow though,” you say back. Spencer just nods, awarding you a tight lipped smile.

“See you,” his voice is a distant sound as you walk with Tyler.

_____

But, hook-ups were ephemeral, predestined to be anything but long-lasting and in order for things not to get sticky it was only a week after that you and Tyler broke things off. Tyler was too kind for you to let things get too messy. So you didn’t, and for you that was the end of road. Spencer was well... Spencer, still.

The game was still on, but you had no moves for now. You figured for now you just go and have fun, see what happened.

That would work better than you wanted. The next function was Tara’s birthday. She was disappointed that you and Tyler had ended things but was happy to hear you two were friends. You wish you could explain everything else to her but you figure that it’s obsolete.

Spencer was there with Sarah, eyeing you as the both of them sat in the corner. He watched you carefully, not frustrated just... interested.

He catches the way you look to the people around you - listening intently. Your eyes would flash with challenge while you and Luke played drinking games, truth or dare. He watched the way you talked to Luke, confident and excited. He watched the way you danced and ignored him, and it was getting to him more than he wanted to admit.

There was something in the universe that said this was it. He wasn’t sure what it was, or how to explain it. He knew the moment Sarah said she needed to go home, the moment he walks into the kitchen and sees you swaying to music while you poured yourself a drink. The way you talked to him - mostly sober but tipsy enough to just speak candidly. Spencer was in for it, that much was so goddamn obvious now.

“Where’s Sarah?,” your voice is curious.

“Went home, she has a long day tomorrow. For work,” he clarified. You hum in response.

“That sucks, you must be bored,” you say honestly. Spencer shakes his head.

“Don’t worry about it,” he says back. You look at him curiously, eyes reading his expression that seems so far out.

“She’s sweet,” you say earnestly. You stand next to him, sipping your drink as you stare out. Spencer looks over at you and nods.

“You’d know something about that,” his voice is low. You’re a little startled, but you just pick yourself up to walk out of the kitchen.

“Too soon,”

——

Soon the picture was bound to fall together. Sarah and Spencer ended things - on good terms but it didn’t matter. It was just you and Spencer again, stagnant in an impossible place with impossible ends. Months of jealousy and mind games, combined with stubbornness wasn’t going to end in a way that was pretty but maybe that’s what you wanted. Maybe that’s what needed to happen.

Spencer broke first. Months of frustration would do that to a man who fucked you like you were the only woman on earth. It was just a text message, it should’ve been just a text message anyways but how could it be? No such thing as simplicity in this universe the two of you shared, one of jealous reminders and sly comments. All that subtext meant that the build up was that much more impactful.

Spencer: How long has it been?

You: Long enough.

You: Checkmate.

Spencer: Good game, Y/N.

It probably wouldn’t make a lick of sense to anyone else but you and Spencer just knew. You knew what it was - an invitation to come over like you’d done so many times before. It was a recognition that the game was over and it was up to you to reap the benefits of your long-term, maddening and frustrating endeavors.

——-

The drive to Spencer’s house was taking more time than it normally did. You knocked at his door and when you opened it, there Spencer was. He was pretty.

“Come in,” Spencer’s voice was low. The whole environment was thick with an immediate feeling of lust - derived of painfully long and drawn out arguing. It was foreplay in its own right, you suppose.

It was instantaneous. Like the second the door shut behind you, Spencer backed you into a wall - shedding your coat while his hands found themselves underneath your blouse. He hikes your leg up to his side as he looks at you, down into your eyes as his lips and breath ghost over yours. Your breathing is so fast you’re afraid you might pass out. You can’t help yourself whimper. Spencer voice borders visceral.

“You’re gonna drive me fucking insane,” Spencer comments. You hold your eye contact.

“I always was,” you challenge Spencer still. You were determined to piss him off as much as humanly possible because you needed him to own you.

Spencer can’t hold out for another second as his lips press against yours. Open mouthed kisses that are carried over and drawn out, as Spencer’s hands grip your thighs - pushing his hips to yours. He’s so eager to touch you - fuck you over and over again until you’re too tired to speak. Spencer was ready to do things to you that he’d never let himself do before. When his teeth tug at you bottom lip, tongue let reckless along your lips as he kisses you deeper - you know he’s been thinking of you. He’s indulging his own selfish desires by kissing you this way and he knows it. You kiss him back with just as much frustration and anger.

It needs to be everything. It needs to fulfill your needs and desires that have been growing for the last few months and you’ll fuck him till sunrise, sit on his face and disrespect him till he gets it. That he’s yours just as much as your his.

You and Spencer kiss like there’s no oxygen left, but you pull back from Spencer to breathe. Your chest rising and falling as Spencer looks at you - really looks at you. His eyes are full of fire.

“Don’t you wanna talk, Spencer?,” your voice is biting. Spencer rolls his eyes.

“You start,” Spencer comments, picking you up as he buries his face in your neck. You smile for a second as he carries you to his bedroom.

“Was she good?,” it’s your first question of the night, Spencer shrugs as he lays you down. His fingers work to unbutton your blouse, eyes glued to your chest. Lace, it was new but not new enough to be for him. A purposeful move on your part as Spencer’s fingers work their way around your back, unclasping it and letting it fall from your frame. You lift your hands up as Spencer slides it off of you - eyes drinking in the sight of you. He hasn’t seen you on display like this and fuck did he miss it. He doesn’t know where to start so he starts at your neck. Kisses being pressed onto your jaw, you relish the way Spencer’s hands find you. They find themselves at your hips, encouraging them to wrap around his waist which you do without question.

Spencer’s lips are soft, his teeth scrape along patches of skin as you crane your neck up so he can get more room. He draws your skin between his lips, sucking softly before kissing the marks, admiring the broken capillaries underneath your skin for a few seconds before continuing. You almost wanna laugh at how much he adores them and they way they decorate your neck.

“She was good,” Spencer replies to you between actions. You’re a little distracted but you had so much you wanted to know still.

“Better than me?,” your voice is bitter. Spencer laughs, pressing his dick against you, before speaking.

“What if she was?,” Spencer replies back.

“Answer the question,” you demand. Spencer looks up at you as your expression shifts into one much more displaced.

He decided to be honest with you.

“Not better than you,” Spencer responds softly, mouth travel down to your chest. His mouth finds your nipples, his tongue flicking against t back and forth. The wet trail it leaves behind a cold sensation that made you a little dizzy to how easy they came to attention. Spencer’s fingers touch them carefully, brushing against them with rhythm. You moan, shivering at them.

You felt good - but you could feel something missing in the endeavor. Spencer was holding back and you could feel it, slowly reverting back to his old ways by keeping you out of his thoughts and you weren’t going to let that happen again.

“Spencer,” you warn. Spencer’s eyes are glassy, but you sit up to look at Spencer. He sits back on his knees and looks at you as you fix yourself up.

“Don’t do this shit,” you explain carefully. Spencer rubs his face with his hands, not saying anything.

You look at him, your chest bubbling with anger and borderline resentment as he stared at you. His expression is unreadable, as his eyes gaze to your body then flick back up to you.

“For fucksake, Spencer - I’m not doing this. Gimme my shit so I can leave,” you say beyond annoyed. This was one of the problems - that Spencer didn’t have the backbone to just be real with you. Not about how he felt, not about how you made him feel. He always counted on you to force the upper hand but not this time. Semantics required that both of you participate accurately to how you feel and it was always your job. When Spencer sees you move, he holds you back and looks into you. His eyes are dark.

“You’re so fucking aggravating, you know that,” Spencer leans into your neck, his hands on your back as you go to move away from him.

“Clearly not,” you complain. Spencer’s hands come around your neck, both of the around your throat as he forces you to look up at him.

“Color?,”

“Green,”

“You wanna know I’m holding back, Y/N,” he says into your ear. You’re too stubborn to choke out a yes.

“Because you’re such a fucking brat and you haven’t earned it,” He speaks into your ears. You can feel his hands grip tightly around the column of your throat.

“Everytime you open your mouth you manage to piss me off. You think it’s cute to be like that, don’t you? ,” His hands release from your neck as you look at him with suprise, trying to hold back your delight. He unzips his pants and pull his cock out.

”Get on your knees,”

“I don’t want to,” you lied between your teeth. You wanted to suck the soul out of Spencer’s body but you needed him to keep this up.

His hands grip your hair and pull tightly. A gasp escapes your mouth as your eyes flutter up to look at him.

“Funny, I don’t remember asking,” Spencer laughs sarcastically, he leans into your ear “Get on your fucking knees,”

You stand up stubbornly and do as your told, keeping your mouth shut as you watch Spencer stand up over you. He’s intimidating like this, his dick clear over your face. He’s huge, which is good and bad.

“Open,” Spencer asks. Your instinct is to open your mouth and stick your tongue out like Spencer had instructed you to do so many times before but you don’t. You look at him dumbly, watch as he hands cup your jaw, tilting your head to look at him.

“It’s only been a few months and you’ve forgotten where you belong so quickly,” Spencer hums. His hands rests on the side of your face as he looks down at you.

“Tyler wasn’t putting you in your place like you deserve to be, no wonder you’ve acted out so much,” he comments, annoyance clear in his voice.

His thumb presses against your lips, forcing your mouth open. You’re quick to oblige after that, your tongue stuck out as you await Spencer.

“Good girl,” The praise is music to your fucking ears. You knew he didn’t want to say, but he meant it and that’s what mattered. You rub your thighs together, as Spencer hits the tip of his cock against tor tongue.

“Before, I would’ve never done this, but you’ve just somehow managed to upset me so much that the prospect of you interrupting my thoughts is so annoying that I just have to make sure I shut you up,” Spencer explains lengthily.

Spencer eases his way to the back of your throat, his hand on the back of your head as he feels his dick hit the back of your throat. Spencer’s bigger than you remember him being, and the idea that he was going to fuck your throat made you sore, voice already disappearing. You just look up at him, through long lashes and Spencer groans.

“Touch yourself and I won’t fuck you for months,” Spencer warns. You damn yourself for wanting to obey him and doing as he says.

Spencer’s hips pullback before he snaps them back to the back of your throat. You choke on and Spencer relishes in the noise. Tears forming at the corners of your eyes as you managed to look up at him. Mascara runs under your eyes as Spencer falls into rhythm, filling your throat with his length at a constant speed. The sounds of you gagging around it filled the room as Spencer’s voice fell to your ears, spit spilling from the corners of your lips. You move your hands to wipe it away and Spencer’s stops you.

“Leave it, you’re prettier like that,”

Jesus Christ.

“You always manage to make me so angry, and I’m honestly kinda impressed by it,” Spencer says softly, groans mixed with his commentary. You hum for him to continue and the sensation makes his leg twitch.

“You’re just so fucking stubborn. If you would’ve told me you were so jealous, I would’ve ended things immediately,” he admits to you.

“Then Tyler came around and I lost my patience,” he explains, fingers brushing your hair out of your face.

“As far as I’m concerned, you’re mine,” Spencer repeats. You feel your heart melt.

“Seeing you with Tyler was lesson enough, so I’m gonna fuck you until every memory you had with him is shit compared to how I fuck you,”

“Every mark on your body, my dick down your throat - stretching you out when I fuck you. I should’ve know this was what you wanted really,” Spencer quips. You groan around him - absolutely turned on by his possession.

“You’re a slut for me, and me only, right love?,” Spencer asks you, pulling his dick out from the brutal session as you look to him with a bordering disgusting amount of adoration.

“Yes, sir,” your voice is hoarse as you look up at him. His eyes look at you with so much love as he smiles down at you.

“You’re so good for me,” Spencer says softly. He kisses you softly and slow and you could cry from how pliabld you felt.

“Sir, I love you,” your voice was fucked beyond belief. Spencer’s heart melts at the combination of title and sub space. He kisses you softly, petting your hair and wiping your chin of spit.

“I love you too, princess,” He says, making sure that you two talk about it later. “You still want it rough, sweetheart?,” he asks checking up on you. You appreciate the sentiment but you shake your head with vigor.

“If you don’t fuck me like a total brat I’m going to be unbelievably upset,” you say, the sad thought sobering you up immediately. He laughs aloud, kissing you again.

“Okay, what’s your safeword?,” Spencer asks.

“Gren for go, yellow for slow down, red for stop,” you repeat obediently. Spencer smiles.

“Get on the bed for me,” Spencer says softly. You oblige fast, holding your legs in the air as Spencer kneels between your legs. Your legs wrap around his shoulders pulling him closer and he chuckles.

Spencer’s rock hard, thinking about the outfit you chose for him. White cotton panties that left a mess all over your thighs and clit. The stain between your legs makes it hard for Spencer to slow down.

Spencer places a kiss on your clit, swollen and untouched, your cry immediately in his ear, your hands gripping his hair as he places kisses all over your clothed pussy, your skirt pushed over your stomach. His fingers hook into your underwear, sliding them down, and letting you maneuver your legs to slide them off. You go to take the skirt off but Spencer stops you.

“Leave it,” He breathes out. You nod, biting your lip as you feels Spencer lips work around your clit. He doesn’t make you wait long, and you’re not sure whether or not you should be grateful or scared for whats to come.

Spencers mouth is terribly skillfully, his tongue licking a long swipe - collecting arrousal in his mouth before spitting it back onto your clit. You were a goner before this but watching Spencer do something so filthy really pushed you to the edge. You grinded against his mouth but he pushes your hips down. He uses his fingers to spread you, eyeing how wet you are before closing his eyes - tongue placing long flat swipes along it. Your clit pulsates as he buries his face between your legs - tongue placing minmal pressure it as his head bob up and down. Spencer was so good at giving head it was kind of annoying. He’d draw you close to the edge a few times like that, watching as your legs shake before he slows down again -mpaying attention to your thighs and waist everytime he watched you come down from your high.

“Spencer, please let me cum - please,”

“Please what?,”

“Please sir,” your voice escapes you as you hear Spencer chuckles looking at you pathetically. He shakes his head.

“Brats don’t get to cum so soon, you wanna cum - you have to earn it remember?,” Spencer reminds. You whine at the reminder, immediately protesting.

“I did earn it, I did,” your argument is meaningless but you wanted to cum - needed to cum and if he doesn’t give it to you soon you were going to cry.

“Aw, is that so? You behaving while I facefucked you means you earned an orgasm huh? That’s news to me, love,” Spencer says sarcastically. You aren’t sure how you could be more turned on but here you were. Spencer could be so biting when he wanted to be and it drove you up the wall.

“God,” you were infuriatingly turned on. Spencer strips of his shirt and pants, leaving the both of you in similar positions. You lay in wait for further instructions, but catch Spencer admiring you for a second. You hide your face in your hand and Spencer refrains from saying anything. He wants to tell you you’re so cute and that he loves you but he’s still supposed to be being mean to you - so his hands are tied.

“Stand up,” Spencer instructs. You oblige, stretching a bit as you do. Spencer comes behind you, pressing his dick against your backside as his voice is drawn next to your ear.

“You wanna cum don’t you?,” Spencer asks. You nod, chewing the inside of your lip.

“But, I already told you you have to earn didn’t I?,” Spencer repeats, you nod again.

“Use your words,” Spencer orders. Your voice croaks out.

“Yes, sir.”

“Then bend over with your hands behind your back and take it for me, will you?,” Spencer instructs. You do as your told, bending down, placing your hands behind your back. You feel Spencer's hands grip around your wrist - holding you up as he lines himself up at your entrance. It’s a slow, aching burn. Your more wet than you can really fathom being, but Spencer manages to make you feel tight. Every inch of him slowly gnawing you from the inside but it feels so good. It aches so good - you don’t recall the last time you felt this fucking full. Spencer was sunken into you so deeply, it felt like he belonged there. Like every claim about your body is his when he fucks you wasn’t just showy shit-talk but facts, plain and simple. You didn’t really know it could feel that good to get fucked before this and it could’ve been anything that made it so maddening.

Spencer's hips pound you out. You can’t feel everytime he speeds up, slows down, moves up or draws the gesture out. Your body aches, but the position is so goddamn perfect - hitting your g spot, pressing up against it so forcefully - you feel your legs threaten to give out everytime he hits it. It’s fucking ridiculous - fucking ridiculous how good fucking one person could be but Spencer proved himself every damn time.

“Wanna fuck you on the bed, love,” Spencer leans down to whisper. You let Spencer rebalance you as you stand up, and Spencer pulls out. You whimper, missing the feeling of him in you, but you soon feel Spencer's arms around you.

“You’re too pretty to make such filthy noises, my love,” Spencer whispers “But that’s what sluts do, don’t they? Be pretty and filthy all at once,”

You’re really incoherent. You want to say something that makes sense, argue back and fight with him but your desire to cum so hard you black out is much stronger than any urge you may have had to fight. You don’t know how to do anything but whine, so high-pitched and needy you feel like your voice could crack and disappear. Spencer just laughs.

He lays down, and awaits you. You managed to get on the bed, facing away from Spencer as you throw your legs on either side of him. He bends his knee, as you turn to straddle his thigh - pressed against your clit. He clenches the muscle and you feel your legs shake.

“Sir, please tell me I’ve earned it,” are the first words that leave your lips as you begin griding against Spencers thighs, riding his dick to the point your thighs felt like they’d give out at any second. Spencer groans at the feeling of you convulsing, so close to the edge. Spencer just nods.

“You’re such a good girl for me, of course you can cum for me,” Spencer says lovingly, voice missing any trace of disrespectful strict dom Spencer. Replaced with adoring Spencer in an instant.

“Fuck, fuck - Spencer, thank you. Oh my god, thank you,” you hold onto Spencer's legs as your orgasm breaks the tension rope that was holding it back. You’re unknotted, the feeling of pleasure clawing at all the aches that appeared all over your body, your skin burning. Your stomach was full of butterflies, all releasing at the same time as your entire body convulsed around Spencer. It was earth-shattering - your body struggling to keep up as you cum the hardest you have in months. It was so fucking good, the type of orgasm that keeps you awake for days at a time.

You breathe out, steady yourself as you slide off of Spencer and get on all fours infront of him. You take his dick into your mouth, sucking on the tip before taking all of it in your mouth. Spencer groans aloud as he finished into your throat, and you swallow without hesitation. Spencer looks at you so adoringly right after, as you crawl onto his chest and lay on him. He wraps his arms around you and smiles at you so brightly, it could blind you.

“You did so good for me, I’m so proud of you,” Spencer praises. You blush hiding in his chest, looking at him with disgraceful amounts of affection.

“You ready for aftercare?,”

You nod lazily, before Spencer sits up and whisks you away to the shower.

___

You knew that you were in love with Spencer a while ago - but until now you hadn’t realize just how much you missed him. His fingers were massaging shampoo into your hair, the shower lightly pouring on the both of you as you made idle and loving conversation. There was a suprising about of things to catch up on. Spencer kissed your shoulders as he continued on.

“I liked Sarah, you know,” you say softly. Spencer is confused by your sudden statement.

“I really did - but at the time I just figured we were just having sex so it made me jealous when I saw you with her. I didn’t know how to tell you so I just let it be but it was killing me,” you confess honestly, wiping your nose as you sniffled. Spencer wrapped his arms around your back and kissed your neck - softly pressing kisses to all the bruises from the moments before. You leaned into him and sighed and he held you for a long while.

“We were never anything more than casual,” Spencer assures you. You nod, turning around to face him. Your arms envelope Spencer, holding him close to you with your face carefully in the crook of his neck.

“I know, but still, sex is just sex and the rest is semantics isn’t it,”

“Well, yeah. It means something to me when I do this to you. You’re my world, so it means I love you. Maybe it looks the same but it feels so different, it feels right when it’s you,” Spencer says sadly. You look up at him tear eyed and he smiles at you.

“I love you, Spencer,” you say softly. He hugs you and makes you feel so safe. Even after all the words and glances and difficulties Spencer shows you in bed - he gives you twice that in love without question. He makes you feel whole, even when he was the one who unraveled you. He adores you, so clearly and you adore him too.

___

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