#and it makes me feel guilty bc i dont want to date.

[angelicstalker]

Omfg

[orcelito]

There's also the impulse to be like "women ain't shit" but that's a lie I love our women. Not women as a whole's fault that one of them turned out a selfish bastard of a coward.

I just need to find a woman who doesn't treat me like That. Get me a good butch. I need me a good butch.

[angelhound]

Why does everyone want to take my pants off is this normal. Is it normal for all of your friends to want to fuck you genuinely. I do not think I like it

[mainfaggot]

i am just mourning losses that havent even occurred

[marnikula]

Can u do early seasons spencer x reader who has a lot of problems and they let people walk all over them and they dont set boundaries and they struggle with their emotions. Reader likes spencer a lot but doesn't seek him out bc they feel like he deserves better! And u can decide what happens but make it happy ending :)

Oh my word, I literally spent like 2 hours writing this because I wrote something and then my internet cut out when I posted and now it's lost, so I had to rewrite it. Hope you enjoy!

Cw: gn reader, people dumping work on reader, Spencer being cute

Enjoy!

You were a doormat. You knew it, your friends knew it, everyone knew it. You tried to set boundaries, to say no, but it never seemed to stick. Saying no made you feel guilty, it made you feel like a bad person even though you knew you weren't.

Being a doormat, people tended to walk all over you, requesting ridiculous things of you. That is how it came to be that you were sitting alone in the bullpen, the clock ticking away, showing you that it was around midnight and you still had a whole stack of papers to go through. You felt yourself about to fall asleep, and truly, you were too tired to fight it off when a ding signaled the arrival of someone.

Without even turning to look who it was you knew it was Spencer Reid. You recognized his footsteps, and even if you didn't, the smell he brought with him would have alerted you. It was the smell of coffee mixed sweet undertones, almost as if he had spent his whole day in a café. It was intoxicating. "What are you still doing here?" "Working, I have a lot of stuff to finish before tomorrow" "you mean today" looking back at the clock you could see he was right, it was now officially the next day.

"Do you need some help?" without even waiting for you to decline Spencer took half of the pile you were working on. He moved fast, knowing you well enough to know that you hated asking for help, especially from him, he just could never figure out why.

"Spencer, you really don't need to, I've got this" reaching your hands to take the files back only to be swatted away by the doctor was something you did not expect. "I'm not saying you don't have it, I'm just going to help you so you can go home earlier"

Sighing you admitted defeat and went to go make coffee for the two of you. With Spencer's help you managed to make it through the massive stack of papers on your desk in less that an hour, something you would never have been able to do on your own.

"You, doctor Spencer Reid, are amazing, what can I do to thank you?" it was a slight tease on your part. You didn't expect him to ask you anything return, it wasn't like him, he was too nice . That was one of the things you loved about him, and one of the reasons you willed the crush growing in your heart to shrivel up and die. He deserved so much better than you. Someone with a mind as amazing as his own, someone with kindness rivaling his and someone who knew how to say no. You were none of those. At least not in your own eyes.

"You could go on a date with me" Spencer surprised himself with those words, he really hadn't meant to say them out loud, but he really liked you, and in a moment of confidence inspired by sleep deprevation, he decided to take a chance.

"Really? You mean it?" the both of you were blushing hard at this point, him thinking about how he could have possibly screwed this up and you thinking about how this could possibly get any better.

"I-I mean, only if you want to, you really don't have to feel pressured, I know I said I would take it as paiment, but honestly spending time with you was enough of a payme-" grabbing his face in your hands you turned him to look at you, shutting off his ramblings with the movement and shutting off his brain with your words

"I would love to"

[bangtangalicious]

bts smut recs | needy!jungkook

there is something about when our lovely jeon jungkook is portrayed to be a hormone crazy, super needy, greedy, whiny character that is so fucking hot. tmw readers. i know you’ll love these. the hyper-horniness and blatant hunger for sex is so sexy. these are all jungkook x reader 18+ SMUT recs based on this theme. more to be added as i find them!!! 

🔺 = yandere/taboo themes *ALL ARE SMUT

MILF (series) by @koosbabygrl | 🔺 ive read this so many times. like. SO MANY TIMES. this is PEAK needy!koo energy. its so fucking hot i cant even put it into words. theres this mommy kink moment and i CANT get over it holy shittttttttt. also the sequels are GREAT, in part 2 when he has her riding his cock while she does her makeup oh my fucking godDDDDDDD. amazing.

this specific needy!koo drabble by @voidswan | 🔺 i know its not a full fic but its literally so hot i cry. bunny!koo just wants to fuck so bad poor thing I DONT KNOW WHY IM JUST OBSESSED OK the stuttering gets me every fucking time. screams. 

clean up by @lonelyhobi & @scribblemetae | he’s drunk and he feels so guilty abt it but he cant help himself!! god its FEVERISHLY good. he’s all whiny and crying and he needs u so bad and the way its described is so fucking hot. the dirty talk is inSANE. dry humping. fuck. amazing amazing.

thunderstorms are scary by @lonelyhobi & @scribblemetae | same couple, but this innocent needy kook is just scared and comes to sleep w noona and then ends up groping you and poor kookie just cat stop bc you feel so good. he ruts into ur ass and whines and ugh. brilliantttttt. honestly recommend this whole masterlist of step-bro fics from them its amazing. theres also a fun loss-of-innocent taehyung one :))))

training wheels by @fithehunnybee | theres a twinge of like sneaky manipulation in this one which i love. y/n kinda a bitch but she drives poor lil koo up the mf WALL. we have some cumming in pants action which i know you all LOVE hehehehe. also i love that it builds the tension so well with koo getting so desperate and y/n teasing..poor lil bunny

the dark prince (series) by @jkeuphoriadreamland | 🔺 LISTEN. first of all, read all their works bc, chefs kiss, but focusing on the needy koo in this, he DEVELOPS mmkay, he starts off all innocent but once he has a taste oh boy does he know what he wants (its you, btw *wink). poor boy cant see at first but he cant fucking help himself your touch drives him insane. how can you resist? the slow burn. the build up. the teasing. IMMACULATE. 

thank you, baby (series) by @scribblemetae | 🔺 im gonna clickbait you ALL into reading this. its twisted in the best way. a few personal highlights for me are when y/n is wearing the VR goggles and jungkook is like yeah imma just slide my cock in real quick lmfaooo its really hot though. the sort of unraveling of the reader adds to the desperation and neediness of both of their sexual actions. its fanfuckingtastic. each part has a good dose of things we all crave: begging, whining goodness

born sinner (series) by @1kook | OUR GOOD LIL CATHOLIC BOY IS UP TO NO GOOD and its got so much of his POV and the GUILT is so well portrayed and makes the whole thing seem more taboo/intense and its just fantastic mmm. 

forbidden by @googikoo | 🔺 again, i read this more times than i can admit. its not so much loss of innocence and more like straight up NEEDY but essentially sneaky devious lil koo is dating your daughter but, obvi, he wants you ;) 

teeth by @sweetbunnykook | ITS LIGHT SMUT BUT ITS JUST REALLY HOT LIKE I CANT EXPLAIN IT JUST READ IT ITS HOT

and not to be entirely self-serving but in case you want more..i too have dabbled in this genre ;)

touch me wherever

tickle me there 

touch yourself here 

wanna touch you 

soaked n’ slippery

ALWAYS LOOKING FOR MORE!! if you know of any other fics that fit this niche please feel free to lmk!! im always looking for new reads :) this one is for my TMW readers. i know what you like hehehehe ;)

[akalikai]

TMAGP EP 30 SEASON FINALE REACTION (SPOILERS)

OH MY GOD IM IN CLASS OK HERE WE GO READING THE TRANSCRIPT I'LL LISTEN LATER

i hate the episode name btw

SAM YOU FUCKING IDIOT SHE'S NOT ANGRY YOU'RE IN DANGER YOU STUPID MOTHERFUCKER AAAAAAAA YOU'RE GONNA GET YOURSELF KILLED (also the transcript saying he sounds "ill" i don't like that)

"alice means well but she doesnt really understand" oi celia what do you mean she doesn't understand she got attacked by the same thing sam did

"my head is killing me" i dont think this is a normal headache ALSO IM SO SUSPICIOUS DONT TAKE THE PILLS SAMAMA KHALID COME ON

"all goes to plan" WHAT CELIA WHAT (they say like they're surprised that she's sus)

"ticket officer, not paid enough for this" NONE OF US ARE BUDDY

oh jesus christ colin is gonna end up dead isnt he. and possibly teddy too. both of them acted the same way based on alice saying she was busy

waiy. colin is in the office, but lena and gwen are in the office too?? also lena is gonna end up dead and gwen is gonna feel guilty isn't she

OH NEVER MIND. GWEN YOU'RE ABOUT TO GET FUCKED. I REALLY HOPE LENA GETS TO GO HOME TO HER SPOUSE AND GOES "yeah fuck THAT I'm glad I'm out of there"

wait they KNOW it was one the train??? wtf???? and why is celia so calm about this

"what unit did you say it was?" "Seventeen-" SEVENTEEN RIGHT HERE-sorry I'm coping with jeonghan's enlistment date okay

CELIA WHAT THE FUCK WHAT DO YOU MEAN CALL IT A HUNCH. GIRL ARE YOU SERVING THE EYE?????

"we want your teeth" JARED HOPWORTH??? IS THAT YOU????

now who the FUCK is this custodian hold on checking the VA list-ok nvm not breekon or hope i was wondering bc. yknow. custodian. maybe a reference

this custodian is so real he's like "yeah no this ain't any of my business you do you boo"

LMFAOOO THE TAXI DRIVER THINKING SAM IS CHEATING ON ALICE WITH CELIA AND THAT SHE'S GOING TO KILL THEM BOTH

THE CUSTODIAN JUST YELLING "SHUT UP" IS TAKING ME OUT OH MY GOD AND THE KNOCKING ACTUALLY STOPS

get archivisted bro

oooo okay so hilltop centre got a bloody history. but also who is this "he" that hired the custodian? also the fact that he refuses to come in the daytime is very interesting because usually people would find it less creepy at daytime but he seems to be more comfortable at night?? which is giving the dark but ok

poeple ARRIVED???? NO WAY THEY CONFIRMING THE CRACK AT HILLTOP ROAD CONNECTS HERE ALONG WITH MOST PROBABLY OTHER UNIVERSES

"why the outfit was so mismatched, why the clothes were been pinned in place" okay this is kind of reminded me of the stranger for no particular reason????

OH THE FUCKING OWNER DIED OKAY

SORRY AS HE TURNS TO CONCRETE?????? WHAT????

a precipice????? sorry is there a whole-ass different world??? also celia wtf do you mean "almost"??? yeah sam its about time you asked her more questions

Sam's headache is not comforting me i don't think its normal WOOOOOO CONFIRMATION THE UNIVERSE-JUMPER CELIA

ahhh there it is. she was using him as a balance because she hoped getting him close enough to the magnus institute would make him enough a balance.

IS THE ARCHIVIST STOPPING HER???? ALSO SAM WHAT THE FUCK WHY ARE YOU JUST TELLING HER TO DO IT????

god sam you fucking idiot i love you. she betrayed you and lied to you and yet you still fought the archivist for her. also alice coming here worries me because i think she has a close connection to the magnus institute too and she might get sacrificed

NOT AGAIN???? OH MY GOD DID HER PARENTS DIE IN HILLTOP ROAD?????

gwen you're gonna get yourself and everyone killed oh my god

...see i dont know if i trust that now. i know celia hesitated but who's to say she wouldn't take the opportunity to push sam? or even not done anything when she had the chance to save him? i mean...i guess she did say "even though..."

MAN. SAM. I KNEW YOU WERE PROBABLY GONNA DIE FIRST BUT DAMN. STUPID MAN. I LOVE YOU.

i dont think sam is dead i mean celia fell through the rift and lived, who's to say sam couldn't do the same? the question is, which universe did he fall into? and will celia tell alice the truth about what she was planning?

mainly, though, i need to know whats going on with colin because WHAT DID HE MEAN WITH FR3DD1 WHAT HAPPENED. AND WHAT IS GOING ON WITH TEDDY.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

wibta if i didn't invite my (or my fiance's) parents to our "wedding"?

neither of our parents are abusive or anything-- they're all fine supportive parents. however this is a shotgun wedding, planned on very short notice for reasons i won't get into here. originally it was just going to be me (26F), him (26M) and two of his friends (20s M/NB) as witnesses in the woods signing a document and then we'd all go party in a lake. however, my best friend from my home country (26F) turns out to be coming to this country on an unrelated trip on the same date, so we invited her too. so in total, five people signing papers and jumping in a lake

the problem is that my mum is going to be in this country during the elopement, so when i mentioned inviting my friend (who will be traveling with my mum) my mum also asked to come. furthermore, partner wants to invite his siblings over after the ceremony bc they live nearby, so his parents want to come too now.

i'm scared that this level of family involvement and the quantity of people now coming is going to turn it, against my will, into a Whole Thing. the sort of Thing were we'll have to organise proper accommodation and catering and an actual ceremony of some sort. my mum would be coming from a different state and need accommodation at the very least. i'm scared of the future in-laws being there bc partners' parents in particular are quite society-minded and like doing things "properly" and i don't want to feel like they're judging me for eloping with their firstborn in the middle of a forest. like, we're probably going to get married in 8th century danish garb and have a nupital swordfight, they would think that is so weird. on top of it all my dad is still in my home country and i'm extremely close with him, so i'd feel wrong and guilty if everyone got to be there except with him. (we do not have the money for him to also come over)

on the other hand, i know that it's a huge deal when your kid gets married and they'd WANT to be there. and both his parents and mine have been extremely supportive of us. but idk how to explain this isn't our "real" wedding (we'll have an actual ceremony later) and more of a political elopement. plus hospitality is a value of mine so if we did invite our parents i'd feel very anxious to provide catering and accommodation that i frankly just can't afford to pay for. idk, i just feel like if our parents were there i'd spend the entire ceremony feeling anxious and ashamed and judged, rather than reveling with my partner and close friends. but i don't want to make my mum or his parents feel like i dont care about them.

so, wibta for excluding our parents from our shotgun wedding?

What are these acronyms?

[redditreceipts]

Hi ♡ I love your blog so much, first off. I wasnt sure whether to send this on anon or not, but i am a little worried about backlash from tras, and I dont want anyone to misinterpret or think im being disrespectful to my former partners. I have nothing but love and sympathy for them, please don't get it twisted.

Secondly, I'm a lesbian and in the past when I was younger I dated trans men/nonbinary-identified girls and even though it makes me feel guilty to admit it to myself now, I really was attracted to them purely because they were female and it made me feel way safer than dating a male.

I was in denial about my lesbianism and I think for me that was a way to date "men" without having to actually date a male, if that makes sense. One of the things that really clued me in was the time my ftm partner bought a "packer" (basically a fake penis) and wanted to be intimate with me using that. (Which was a little odd bc packers are typically "soft". Yeah...) I wasnt comfortable using something that looked like a penis and that was eye opening for me.

Maybe I'm rambling but I'm just wondering how many other lesbians have had experiences like this before... P.s. love the cute animal pics :) thank you for putting a smile on my face ♡

Hey :) thank you so much!

yeah, I think that a huge problem is that for some reason, people don't seem to understand that sexual orientation is not influenced by gender identity. It is not superficial to be attracted to a person's body and not to their inner sense of themselves. But I'm super happy that you've accepted your sexual orientation!

I'm not a lesbian but I have also had experiences with trans men who hadn't had transitioned, and it kinda felt weird because the experience was an experience of being intimate with another woman, but it was kinda impossible to explain that to people and I felt kinda stuck when I had to say things like "my boyfriend" or "the guy that I'm seeing", when that was not was I was experiencing. It kinda felt like back when I was in the closet and would change the pronouns of the people that I had a crush on so I would seem straight

so yeah, please don't feel guilty!

also, here is my small collection of cats that live in fairytale-like cat furniture :)

[taeraeszn]

hiii i know your rqs are closed but i wanted to put this in your inbox before i forgot/lost your account.

the headcannons u made on zb1 missing their date.. can you do an extension of yujins where he makes it up to you?

abs fine if you dont wanna do it but id love to see how youd write it 🫶

(if u do end up doing it, pls write yujin being a bit bold. or asking his hyungs for help. hes always written so shy in the other ones 😅)

when zb1 misses a date - yujin extension

hi anon <3 i thought i could write something quickly for you as i've never gotten an ask like this! i actually had to look back at what i wrote bc i forgot what i had written for yujin lol. enjoy!!

link to original

"i feel like the worst.." yujin mumbled while sitting his bed. gyuvin who was laying next to him sat up while comforting him.

"don't worry. i'm sure they forgive you. their coming here today right?" he nodded then checked his phone, seeing a notification from you on kakaotalk. in the message you were informing yujin of what time you'd be there at, three.

"do you think they'd be okay with just watching something inside with some snacks and drinks?"

gyuvin took a bite of the popcorn that just came fresh out of the microwave, "yeah indoor dates are cute...hey, these taste really good!"

as time was ticking till your arrival, gyuvin ended up leaving and yujin had the entire afternoon to himself. his family would also be out leaving the house to the two of you.

the doorbell rang and terry rushed to the door, jumping in excitement. he took a deep breath in and opened the door to reveal you standing you. terry pounced in excitement and you picked them up (idk terry's gender forgive me).

"hi terry!" you greeted, petting their head gently. as you put them down, you faced yujin.

"hi..." you said to your boyfriend, he smiled, "hi, did you get here safely?" you nodded then making your way inside and to his living room.

"yeah the bus was a bit crowded but otherwise it was fine." yujin guided you to his couch and you sat down with the blanket over top of you, terry also decided to accompany the two of you. you took notice of the drinks and snacks on the coffee table.

"i know i already said it but i'm sorry, i still really guilty about it. i wanted to make up for what happened so i brought all of your favourite snacks and drinks. i want today to be better. we can do whatever you want today, this is your day."

you were surprised at yujin's forwardness but appreciated the effort he put into making this day special. without words, you leaned your head on his shoulder.

"i'm so happy you all of this for me yujin! you didn't have to though. honestly just doing nothing with you is all i need." he quickly turned on netflix to look through some k-drama's to watch.

"y'know what.." he handed the remote to you, "choose what you want to watch." he scooched a bit closer to you and gently held your hand.

"oh-what? really?"

"for sure." you grabbed a handful of popcorn then scrolled through the selection, eventually picking one. as it began playing, silent embraced the two of you but however you enjoyed it. this was the best type of date to make up for yesterday.

but just then.."(name)." you turned away from the tv, "i love you." you giggled, "love you too."

the rest of the afternoon was filled with laughter and smiles between you and yujin. he was sure to make this the best date ever, even ordering pizza later in the day.

in the end, yuijin did follow up on his promises and in the best way ever.

[polyamorouscultureis]

Hi, I have a situation that I can’t really talk about with ppl. I need to talk to someone about it tho bc I’m so confused, I hope it’s ok I’m asking you? When I find ppl in similar situations online, all I see is them being shamed and told they don’t really love their partner. I thought maybe ppl who are poly have more understanding for how I’m feeling. That’s why I’m here. I’ve been with my partner for 12 years now and I’m so in love with them, I want to spend life with them. I also have a good friend that I like very much. I want her in my life. Recently I’ve been starting to think about her a lot more and even started to feel butterflies when I see her or when I think of her and I want to see her a lot more. I have no real desire to be with her like in a romantic or sexual relationship. I just want to spend time with her, hug/cuddle, laugh and talk. I want to be close to her emotionally, but not really sexually. I feel really confused about this crush and idk if I have to tell my partner? I don’t want to make them unnecessarily insecure or jealous. I know my partner and I think if I told them they’d want me to stop seeing this friend of mine. And this just makes me sad and idk if I’m being unfair here. Should I communicate my feelings even though I don’t even really know myself what these feelings mean? Maybe those feelings will pass and I’m just overthinking it?

I'll be honest with you, sometimes the lines are so blurry between friendship, romance, and sexual attraction that trying to find a label for it is more energy than it's worth. In my ideal world, everyone would do whatever they want to do with different people without feeling the need to put their desires into just one category.

I dont know if you have a crush on your friend, but it's clear that you care about both her and your partner very deeply. In my opinion, you should never feel the need to choose between a partner and a friend being in your life. But when the lines aren't clear I understand that it gets complicated.

I would talk to your partner about it, not necessarily trying to open the relationship or anything (unless you want to), but just getting clarity on what the two of you consider to be cheating (holding hands, cuddling, kissing cheeks, kissing lips, different kinds of sex, etc?) and make sure they are comfortable with the ways you interact with your friend. It doesn't necessarily mean dating them, but you can still be emotionally close. You mentioned, for example, wanting to cuddle with your friend but not be sexually involved. If your partner sees no issue with cuddling, then everyone gets what they want and no one feels guilty, jealous, or disappointed! If they're not, the two of you can spend some time drawing specific lines. And of course, reassurance that loving many people in many different ways doesn't mean loving anyone any less.

Queerplatonic relationships are also a thing you may have heard of that sounds sort of like what you and your friend are touching on. Might be worth looking into!

I hope this was somewhat helpful for you, and I hope all conversations you have go smoothly <3

[lichtenbergforest]

YOU DONT SEE US LIKE I DO

Summary: How could people leave him? How could they leave this loyal, good soul? How could they hurt Buck like that? He was so easy to love - so he said it.

It’s quiet, but Buck hears it.

Word Count: 3k

Notes: first tumblr post woot woot! this is cross posted on archive of our own - it’s technically a songfic bc i listened to i do by reneé rapp while i was writing. without that song, this fic wouldn’t exist :)

requests go here! • find me on ao3 here!

We fall asleep on the couch, I refuse to move

'Cause it's the only time that I'm ever sleeping next to you

It was a rough shift, and Buck hadn’t taken more than a look to follow Eddie back to the Diaz household.

Rough days always ended in movie nights, Christopher would sit between them and hold the popcorn - and he always held them back, relaxing into their hugs despite being a bit ‘too cool’ for that now.

It was the couch that Eddie found himself on after unlocking the door and heading inside, not needing to glance back to know that Buck was following him - he just would be.

He was proven right when the front door closed and the sound of Buck’s bag hitting the floor filled his ears, a tired Buck soon collapsing next to him on the couch. Eddie held his breath for a moment - they were always tactile, but Buck had never simply leaned closer and nuzzled his head into the crook of his neck before.

Eddie tensed up, mind racing as the scent of Buck’s shampoo filled his nostrils and made him dizzy. Buck was out like a light only seconds later, and Eddie manoeuvred his arms around his friend - friend, he tried to remind himself - and carefully moved so that his legs wouldn’t cramp up.

Chris was fast asleep, Carla having gone through his night time routine with him, so it was just them.

And Eddie felt gross, he hasn’t showered after his shift and Buck hadn’t either, but in that moment he didn’t care.

Buck was laying in his arms, his breath was tickling his neck.

And god, he wants.

He wants and wants so selfishly that he should feel guilty, but he never would when it came to Buck.

His best friend, his co-parent, the person who he revived, the person who survived and came back to him.

His Buck.

Some days it hurt - the cemetery was rough, meeting Natalia was god awful, and he thanked his lucky stars that it had ended.

He’d promptly broken up with Marisol, which hadn’t gone quite as well as he’d hoped.

“We went on a double date, with your kid! What the hell do you mean this isn’t working?!”

He held back a shudder at the mere memory of that conversation.

His love for Buck just outshone everything else - eclipsing everything else and making life feel worth living.

But while Eddie wasn’t ashamed of his love for Buck, he was a coward.

And tomorrow he would feel guilty for letting himself fall asleep on the couch just to hold him for a bit longer.

When we're saying, "I love you"

I mean it different than you do

Sometimes Eddie felt brave - he had to at least try and tell Buck.

The man had driven over in the rain at 2am on the night of a shift the second Eddie called and mentioned having a particularly bad nightmare. If Eddie hadn’t been in love with him before, he absolutely would be now. Buck did all of that and more for Eddie - he felt like he at least owed him that.

Buck was in the kitchen making his special hot chocolate for them, and Eddie was sitting on the counter watching as buck melted the marshmallows for his concoction.

The kitchen light was the only light on in the house, and Buck is wearing mismatched socks, cookie monster print boxer shorts and a white t-shirt, and it’s leaving Eddie feeling some type of way as the light hits him just right.

How could people leave him?

How could they leave this loyal, good soul?

How could they hurt Buck like that?

He was so easy to love. So he said so.

“I love you”

It’s quiet, but Buck hears it.

He blinks once, twice and then smiles all sleepy and pauses what he’s doing.

He takes two steps towards Eddie, and he feels like he’s frozen as Buck squeezes his shoulder and says he loves him right back.

“I love you too, Eds - you’re my best friend and I want to be here for you” he says.

Eddie feels cold all of a sudden.

He feels a little melancholy after that, like his heart hurts, like it’s bleeding and trying to claw his way out of his chest

You don't see us like I do

You don't see us from my view

It's like we're both looking up

And I'm under a storm

And you’re seeing sky-blue

“To Maddie and Chimney!” Hen shouted across the patio, everyone cheering and taking a sip of their desired drinks.

Maddie looked beautiful, and Buck had looked so unbelievably choked up at his first glimpse of her.

He’d grabbed Eddie’s hand as he sucked in a deep breath - Eddie had expected him to let go after the tears stopped welling up, but he hadn’t.

Eddie was torn between watching Maddie and Chimney’s vows and looking from Buck to their hands - he only felt a little bad.

He felt cold when Buck released his hand at Maddie’s announcement.

“Bouquet toss! Gather round, singletons!”

Buck was on his feet quickly at that, and Eddie had a moment to just…look at him - to appreciate the way the light hit his skin, the way his skin dimpled at the corner of his mouth.

He was beautiful.

Eddie was so in love.

Sometimes he wanted to tell him - he’d almost told him so many times, but then Buck would say something - or look at him in a certain way, and he just couldn’t.

He couldn’t risk this going wrong for Christopher, for Buck, for their family and their friends.

And his chest ached, god, it ached.

Maddie tossed the bouquet, and Buck jumped towards it, his height giving him an unfair advantage.

And then Christopher was cheering for him as he caught it, he glanced at his Dad’s winded look and cheered a little less.

“Is there a Buck 6.0 update incoming?” Athena joked, glancing from Buck to Eddie with some kind of all knowing look.

It made Eddie’s skin crawl.

Buck laughed, throwing his head back.

Why did he have to be so gorgeous?

“You’re next, little brother! The bouquet said so” Maddie laughed and Buck positively groaned.

“Why do I need to get married next? What if I want to take a break and just, I don’t know, bro out with Eddie?” Buck complained, and Eddie positively choked on his drink.

Athena gave his back a pat from her spot beside him, a smirk pulling at her lips. “I’m sorry - bro out? What on earth are you on about, Buck?!” Josh looked positively confused and extremely amused.

Chimney looked like he knew something no one else did.

Eddie was paranoid.

No one could possibly tell he loved Buck, right?

He prided himself on his ability to school his behaviour.

“You know, staying single and just hanging out with my best friend. We’re basically in an intimate-less marriage anyway! I have everything with Eddie, just in a platonic way, you know?”

Eddie couldn’t fucking breathe.

Chris was beaming beside Buck, looking up at him with glee, “Does that mean I can start calling you dad?” He pondered out loud, glancing at Eddie anxiously.

Buck was glowing, and Eddie felt like he was drowning, but now it was more of like drowning in a jacuzzi, he felt warm as opposed to the cold he felt at Buck’s implications.

Eddie nodded, a smile of his own making its way across his face as Buck nodded and Christopher.

God.

Buck was everything.

And Eddie was so, so blind - how could he not notice the heart eyes that stayed on him the second Eddie was in his presence?

[usertoxicyaoi]

anyway i cannot believe there are some people out there who are saying that sungho's a bad guy and think that he's just stringing junsung along when all along sungho has kept his heart open towards all of junsung's affections and moves on him and has reciprocated his feelings towards junsung back way more than once and has been in a state of constant distress and confusion for the last 2 episodes and is sorting out what he is feeling vs what reality is presenting to him and even in all of that he has remained so so kind and calm and measured and never once made junsung feel like he has no chance with him but instead he cherishes this bond and connection that he has with him, genuinely cherishes every little thing junsung has given him or done for him, lets him tie his wrist with a ribbon so that they're "binded". sungho's such a sweet and simple guy that didn't ask for this mess of a situation to happen and yet he's trying to navigate it in the best way possible and feels so guilty about hurting junsung and/or seunwoo but he also knows he has to decide and in and amongst that he's just gone and heard seunwoo say "oh today (the drama of today) has been fun!" and "oh there's a guy who's been calling me since day 1 and i need to go out on a date with him and give him a chance and if that means i miss out on sungho then so be it," .... he has to deal with THAT too, on top of all of seunwoo's other antics that have really started to rub off on him in the wrong way (poor boy literally had a nosebleed bc he was so stressed!!!), but never treating junsung as his "second safe option", bc he has never done that!

in my mind, honestly speaking, i dont think sungho has ever really deeply connected to seunwoo at all, in anyway, like he has with junsung. which is why junsung says "this has never really been a love triangle at all". junsung knows it, i know it. seunwoo may seem like a rival on the face of it, and id say sungho is attracted to seunwoo's aura, but beyond that? nope. theres just nothing there and there never has been. and its taken a WHILE for sungho to realise and ~compare~ (even tho he HATES doing it bc it makes him feel selfish) the two very different kinda bonds he has with seunwoo and junsung, and which one goes deeper than which, and in which one he finds peace and comfort and enjoyment and everything he is looking for in.

but that doesnt make sungho a bad guy. in ep 6 and 7 he saw seunwoo in a way he hasnt before and hes learning to deal with that and is realising that "no, i dont like this. i dont like what this is making me feel and i wanna make some distance away from him," and realising after spending the whole day with junsung "i wanted to get away from all this drama bc of how distressed and upset and negative this all made me feel and so did he and in that we both just gravitated once again towards one another and came out of it by the end of the day feeling so much better and lighter and happier and closer."

here is sungho! trying to sort out his feelings and be proactive! rather than passive!

[smileymoth]

ok so i gave up figuring out my gender bc i have school and i don't have time for it. However.

its so fucked up to me that i can only ever relate myself to men. like there's so few female characters who i can relate myself to it's always male characters. I don't know if its due to in traditional media being a lack of well written women who aren't 100% traditionally fem, but it feels WEIRD ok!!! the only one i can kind of relate to is Bones from Bones(TV) lol. but thats also bc she's autistic and I'd rather date her instead. And in non traditional media like idk say mcrp, I love all the girls but I don't see myselt in them, it's always some freak whiteboy instead (cough etho cough)

I've felt so guilty for only ever relating to male characters (hence why all my ocs who i relate the most to are men/not women) All the women I see in media/social media, its not a "omg shes like me" moment, its more of a "I want her so bad it makes me look stupid" situation. Which makes sense since I'm a lesbian but uh. Wjere aum I

But like. I'm not a guy? I don't per say want to look like a man. Like my overall gender envy visuals come from, like, embarrassingly, fcking slimecicle, the thomas(? the blond one) guy from Maneskin, fuckin add jozels to the list and most worst of all w**bur s**t bc????. (He does make me me unbelivably angry when i look at him for too long? weird lesbian things ig). But most of them already look like lesbians. WHAT AM I. Weird girlboy freak who looks like the most average woman. But the idea that I look like a woman makes me feel ill . Kind of. If i get my medically humongous tits (still shocked the doctor told me theyre big enough to cause medical issues LOL) reducted it'll be easier to not feel like that much of a womanly woman tho lol .like i dont feel like a woman but i also dont feel like anything else .i dont confirm to the capitalist ideal and the societal idea of a woman, but if gender is a construct then i am a woman? But then me not feeling like a woman has nothing to do with my actual gender and more with societal expectations that i dont want to fill? I feel more like a girl than a woman even though i am an adult woman . Maybe its because i feel like people wont take me seriously bc im a kind of stupid overweight ''woman" . i am also a lesbian and that complicates things even more since have dykes ever been normal abt gender

I got so derailed oh my god . I still dont know why i dont find myself relating to other women. I love spending time with women, theyre wonderful and all, but i just. I dont feel like i fit in with them? I feel like i fit in better with a group of men??? But I also feel more in line with women/femmes???but i dont relate to them????

Like i feel guilty for this but i

??? What the fucj

my ideal gender is loser girlboyfriend who loves her girlfriend and also gets tossed around by her to a acceptable degree. Like i see couples and i just Yearn to be the boyfriend of a girl. I DONT KNoW

I still only like she her pronouns tho lol. And im not particularly butch . Im more femme/futch presenting than anything. I want to be an emo boy): my gender is emo dyke boyfriend JAJWSJWK

[stewieonthewall]

hi sella 😭😭 sorry if this is a lot n u dont gotta answer lol but u said u were in bored n yapping mood sooo..

im breaking up with my partner on thursday, any advice on how to breakup gently/politely...cuz we been tgt for 1.5 years but we've been in each others lives for nearly 13-14... (#childhood friends to lovers type shi)

partner hasnt done anything wrong its just that we're not on the same page w life priorities/our futures

problem is though partner is really attached to me i feel like and i cant help but feel guilty even thought i know im not interested in keeping the relationship anymore

BYEEEEEEE all i’m gonna say is we’re twins 😭🫡🤝

i’m a big believer in honesty so i’d tell them something like what you just said to me. make sure it’s clear that they haven’t done anything wrong but that you’ve just grown apart and you cherished your time together despite that

wait mini rant it’s so annoying how it’s not more normalized for relationships to end just bc people outgrow them like they always have to be this forever thing and sometimes that’s just not realistic. and that should be ok! if it was fulfilling for some amount of time then it was worth it and it’s ok when that time comes to an end!!

i’m assuming based on the history and how you’re talking abt this that you might still be interested in keeping the friendship and if so you just have to be that much more careful (if not, disregard this lmao)

if you do want to keep the friendship, tell them you don’t think either of you are in a place where it would be the best choice for you to keep dating but you do still want them in your life one way or another. only thing here is make sure it doesn’t sound like there’s a chance you’ll get back tg (unless there is ofc)

basically it’s a very delicate situation and i have no idea what i’m talking abt so take all of this w a grain of salt

just know that you’re doing the right thing by ending it bc it’s wayyy better than dragging it along plus you’d prolly subconsciously be less involved in the relationship and they’d be losing their mind over what might be going on

good luck anon 🫶🏼

[arugulalover]

the thing about developing better coping skills and improving your mental health is that when something happens and you experience anxiety its like how the fuck did i used to live like this 24/7. my stomach has been so fucked up and ive had a constant headache for the last 5 days probably bc ive been tryingg to cut back on my caffeine. i really hate transition periods bc the lack of structure truly kills me. i have no idea wtf im supposed to be doing at any given time! also after fting s last night ive come to the conclusion that i need to text that guy and let him know im not interested but i feel guilty because he was really nice. i was reading this essay about how the urge to break things off w ppl "nicely" is really just selfish bc its coming from a place of wanting to control their experience in order to view you in a more positive light and make yourself feel better. which i was like damn true. idk i just feel like the worst person in the world for saying yes to a second date AND inviting him back to my house if i wasn't actually into him. and then when he was leaving i was like "we should def hang out again!" IDK WHY TF I SAID THATTT. sometime feel like i am a bit broken and not fit for human interaction lol.. its like a self fulfilling prophecy bc for the longest time i was like i need to not date bc im too mentally ill for that but then the longer i go wout having those experiences i start to feel like im "behind" and then feel more pressure to date and have sex. even though i dont think i even care a lot about it or want to in the first place. anyways..