Tumgik
#and ive been out of school for almost a year which is so not helpful
morganski-19 · 2 days
Text
Chills Right to the Marrow Part 15
part 1, prev part
note: yeah, this one's going to hurt
Dustin takes a few days before returning to the hospital again. Not because he fully wants to. His mom has been too busy to drive him and Steve’s not really available either. Between work and a period of really bad migraines, Dustin hasn’t wanted to bother him. Which is new to him, but they both could use the break.
This time off has actually helped him some. He’s focusing a bit more on school. Getting assignments done on time and paying more attention in his classes. He’s been able to sleep a little better. Can almost get through the night without waking up in a cold sweat.
It’s been better. So Dustin decides to go visit Eddie again.
Steve’s walking next to him, now up to visiting Eddie. Finally, over whatever was keeping him from even thinking of going into the hospital room unless he needed to. Dustin’s glad, it’s been helping him.
There’s a nurse asking Eddie some questions when they enter. And he’s responding. With words. Not just grunts or blinks. But actual words. Dusitn almost can’t believe it.
“What year is it?” the nurse asks.
Eddie takes a deep breath. “Nineteen,” another breath, “eighty-six.” His voice is scratchy and dry.
“Great,” she marks something on her chart.
Dustin takes his seat next to Wayne, looking hopeful.
“What day of the week is it?”
Eddie closes his eyes, as if he’s trying to pull the memories from his mind. He shakes his head. Looking tired and agitated. The nurse marks another thing on her chart.
Dustin looks to Wayne, the joy in his face falling when he sees the anguish in Wayne’s eyes. There’s something more to this. Something’s wrong.
“Can you tell me what happened right before you came in here, Eddie?”
Dustin freezes and sees Steve tense out of the corner of his eye. Both of them looking to Eddie to see what he says. Knowing that he can’t say what happened. Knowing that he technically could. The NDA waiting for him is left unsigned.
Eddie huffs out a breath, struggling to inhale another one. Starting to peel off the bandages around his IV’s. Struggling, trying to sit up.
“Ed,” Wayne leans forward, trying to reason with him. “We talked about this yesterday. You can’t take those things off. They’re keepin’ you alive, son.”
Yesterday. This isn’t the first time. Eddie’s been more awake for at least a day and no one told him.
Dustin glances at Steve, seeing a mix of emotions on his face. Pain, worry, fear. A deep, rich sadness. Like he knows the words Eddie is going to say next. Knows how terrible they are.
“Fuck you,” Eddie exhales. The look in his eyes both blank and full of anger. He continues to pick at the bandage, succeeding in getting it off.
Wayne grabs Eddie’s wrist, pulling it away from his IV. “I know you don’t mean that.”
“Fuck,” breathe, “you.” The anger doesn’t leave Eddie’s face. Terrifying in how much is translated with how little is expressed. The tiredness holding his muscles back from properly emoting. Yet perfectly getting the point across.
Steve leans down to whisper in Dustin’s ear. “Maybe we should leave. Come back later.”
Eddie’s head lifts when he finally registers Steve and Dustin’s presence. A new flicker of something comes to his face. Just to melt off again. Back to the resting ghost that’s taken over.
“Out,” he snaps. Pushing his arm into the air and pointing at Steve. “Out.”
“I think it’s best you both leave,” the nurse interjects. Trying to hold the IV in Eddie’s arm as he continues to pull.
Normally, Dusitn would protest. Say that he needs to be here. That it would make things better. But it’s only a matter of time until the anger turns on him. He’s not sure he could take that.
Wayne has to pry Eddie’s hand away from the IV again, holding it close to the bar. Just like another cuff. Eddie’s using all of his strength to try and wrench it away. But he’s weak. Falls into the pillows breathless. Exhausted.
Tears start to form in his eyes as his face scrunches up. A soundless sob releasing from his throat. He tries to fight the nurse while she’s reapplying the bandage around his IV. Finally giving up.
Eddie opens his eyes again, finally looking at Dustin. Taking one more giant breath before saying the first thing to him since he died. Tears painting down his face. Pain indented in his eyes.
“Leave,” he whispers. Pleads.
Dustin stands and leaves the room, only making a few steps before his own sob breaks free. There was no look of recognition in Eddie’s eyes. No spark when he saw Dustin. Nothing to give him any solace that Eddie knew who he was. Knew what Dustin meant to him. Knew what happened in those last moments. As Eddie’s body crumbled in Dustin arms.
He remembered none of it. But it remembered him.
Steve pulls Dustin away from the hallway. Wraps his arms around him, holding the pieces as they fall. As the hope Dustin foolishly held shatters. He thought waking up meant Eddie was getting better.
He now sees how wrong that idea was.
They sit silently next to each other in the waiting room. Dustin’s tears drying on his cheeks. Steve not knowing what to say, so just not saying anything at all. It’s deafening.
Wayne finds them after some time. Sits across from them. Silent, until he clears his throat. “I’m sorry you had to see that.”
Dustin wants to respond. Ask what happened in the days he wasn’t here. But his mouth can’t seem to open for the words to form.
“Eddie,” Wayne continues. “Eddie’s goin’ through a bit of amnesia after fully waking up. It’s making him angry, and he’s fightin’ just because of the pain. It’s nothing against you.”
Dustin wasn’t in the room when Will was possessed by the Mind Flayer. He’s only heard the stories from Mike. How Will didn’t remember him that much. Could barely remember his own mom. How the monster took the memories and hid them away. Smothered them. Sequestered Will in his own mind.
Eddie wasn’t controlled by the Mind Flayer. Or anything from the Upside Down. Dustin had given El a picture of Eddie and asked her to see if he was the only one in there. That there was nothing lingering in the depths of his mind that would take him away.
It apparently didn’t need monsters to do that. Sometimes life did that for them.
“Do they know when, if, the amnesia will go away?” Steve asks. Dustin still speechless.
Wayne shakes his head, fighting the mist in his eyes. “Could be days, could be weeks. Won’t know until he’s more conscious. He’s still in and out of sleep, probably won’t be up again till tomorrow.”
Tomorrow. Dustin can only hope that Eddie remembers him tomorrow.
tag list, let me know if you want to be added or removed: @the-they-who-nerded, @insteviewetrust, @croatoan-like-its-hot, @jettestar,
@tinyplanet95, @steddie-as-they-go, @slv-333, @littlecelestialmoth, @thatonebadideapanda,
@fandomsanddeath, @marismorar, @wonderland-girl143-blog, @glass-bottle03, @gutterflower77,
@here4thetrama, @goodolefashionedloverboi, @jaytriesstuff, @cryptid-system, @manda-panda-monium,
@resident-gay-bitch, @anaibis, @xxsutherlandxx, @forevermineliv, @mugloversonly,
@gregre369, @n0-1-important, @different-tale-student, @spectrum-spectre, @tartarusknight,
@devondespresso, @swimmingbirdrunningrock, @cheertain, @anti-ozzie, @autumncrocusandladybug,
@greeniebean911, @cr0w-culture, @stillfullofshit, @connected-dots, @daisynotquake,
@morgannotlefay, @a-little-unsteddie, @dolphincliffs, @maskofmirrors, @me-and-my-sloth,
102 notes · View notes
Text
now why do i get 10x more advertising emails when im waiting for an important one
4 notes · View notes
opens-up-4-nobody · 10 months
Text
...
#i spend so mad god damn time bitching on this website. its bc i dont talk to ppl. whens the last time i had a non functional conversation?#uuuuhhh last weekend or maybe the weekend before that? so like i gotta complain somewhere. so if i stop complaining u can assume i made#friends lmao. ugh. its just. im worried. im worried abt how this semester is gonna go. how this phd program is gonna go#bc i spent the last 2 years destroying myself. realized ive gotta stop doing that. haven't figured out how to stop and now im gonna triple#the amount of pressure im under while trying to do things in a more healthy way. its just like. it objectively doesnt seem like a formula#for good things to happen. im more worried for how catastrophic its gonna b on my brain than i am abt the things i think most ppl would b#concerned abt. like im not worried abt planning and executing a project or teaching beyond fear of the unknown#its like. ive done these things before. theyre difficult but u make due and tackle the problems. but when it comes to: how to maintain a#healthy school/life balance? i dont even kno where to start with that. i just dont bc when u have a learning disability things just take#more time but like how much time is too much? where does it end? i dont kno how to manage it and i dont wanna hate my project by the end#of this. i want to b excited and not paralyzed bc im afraid i cant change my behavior and its gonna kill me#and im worried bc im meeting with my advisor for the 1st time since march before i agreed to join thr lab and have i prepared for this#project which is almost complete unrelated to what i did in my last lab? no bc ive been managing data and im still not done managing data#bc i cant focus bc i collected that data in a way that was actively self destructive. and i mean i kno itll b fine. thr guy seems nice i#just hate that im showing up devoid of enthusiasm bc its all been drowned out by the fear. and thats also gonna make teaching a problem#bc its hard to b excited abt things when there's a hole in your chest and ur desperate for someone to tell u how to fix it. but idk helping#ppl does usually make me feel better so maybe itll b a good thing. forgot how much i feel like im dying when i sit in meetings and#classroom tho lol. god its been 2yrs since i was a student. classes feel like such bullshit now. and yet if i dont get all As i might die#my students better b good. i have the 1st lab section bc thr lead ta couldnt do that time. so im the trial lab and i start fucking Monday#who tf does labs the 1st week of class? ugh. also its an intro bio so like 2/3 of thr class r freshman. lil bby 18yos and some r non bio#majors. and ive been warned that sometimes there r problems with ppl who don't believe in evolution and cause problems. pls let my classes#b good. im not that worried. its just gonna b annoying as fuck. im not good at being authoritative#ugh. i should b reading papers so i dont look like too much of an idiot tomorrow. itll b fine im just an anxious freak. a lil over a week#until i can try to find a therapist. probably seek medication bc i dont kno how else to stop this bullshit. annoying. i grew up with a dad#who gets anxious abt the idea of taking too much medication when he tskes a single ibuprofen. in this household we feel pain and then we#die miserable. this is all his fault. we have the same brain.im just a lil more irradidic than him#its so funny i say that bc im like the least irradic person ever. i do the same things every god damn day. im just irradic in terms of#sometimes i feel like my brain is on fire and im a cry bby lol#whatever. enough bitching. ive got papers to read. or maybe ill just go to bed and read them tomorrow 🙄#unrelated
7 notes · View notes
thecherrygod · 1 year
Text
bitches be like “i dont get why people love french accent that much” until they play disco elysium with the voices on and hear kim kitsuragi, having their entire view changed
thats me. im bitches
20 notes · View notes
kyeomofhearts · 3 months
Text
Back For More | J.WW
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
+ summary: while adjusting to your new life in college, you couldn't help but attract the attention of wonwoo, someone who you happen to have a history with.
+ pairing: badboy!wonwoo x fem!reader
+ word count: 2.7k
+ content: badboy!wonwoo, college au, mature language, flirting (wonwoo is a menace), jealousy. [pls let me know if i missed anything!]
Part I | Part II | Part III | Part IV
[ᝰ.ᐟ] i hope you guys enjoy this! it's most likely going to be a two-parter so definitely let me know if you want to be added to my taglist! i would greatly appreciate it if you guys reblogged (maybe with comments too ^^) since i thrive on your guys' validation :)
Tumblr media
You were tired, very tired.
Granted, this was your own doing. Maybe if you hadn't pushed your responsibilities to the side last night you wouldn't have had to wake up so early to study for an exam, but what's done is done. This whole college thing was not going so well, to say the least. Sure, it's only the beginning of the second semester, but you already feel exhausted by all of your class workloads.
Just ten more minutes of this boring lecture and you could finally go home and crawl into bed. But… that's only if you avoid him today. Which now that you’re thinking about it, you hope he isn’t waiting for you outside, again. That would be the last thing you needed today.
With that being said, things have felt a little weird if you were being honest. Of course, this was your first year of university, so things were bound to feel new and different. But there was something, or rather someone that was making you feel strange.
Around two weeks ago you noticed that Wonwoo, an old classmate of yours, had recently started to become a bit friendly towards you. While that normally wouldn’t be considered weird, you couldn’t help but feel skeptical about his intentions. You knew the kind of people he surrounded himself with, and especially the girls he would go after; which was the exact opposite of you. So what exactly did he want from you?
What also makes this situation more odd is that you’ve basically known Wonwoo for your whole life. Of course, you don’t actually know him, you just happened to go to the same elementary, middle, and high school (which is insane if you think about it). Acquaintance is a perfect word to describe your relationship with him, nothing more nothing less. So yeah… it’s a little weird when the guy you have been around for (almost) your whole life is suddenly trying to befriend you, there definitely had to be something wrong with him.
All you knew about Wonwoo was that he was on the more reserved and quiet side; mainly keeping to himself most of the time. His group of friends was quite the opposite of him, which always made you wonder how he even became friends with them in the first place.
Seeing how the lecture was ending soon, you started to pack your stuff; you were more than ready to dash straight out of the classroom. Having finished all of your assignments for today, you had nothing left to worry about. So once the professor had made her goodbyes, you made a straight beeline to the door, nothing was going to hold you back from your long-awaited nap. Your pace was brisk, attempting to avoid the backed-up main exit, you decided to go to the opposite door. The walk back to your apartment wasn’t too bad either, most of the time you saw it as a way to daydream and listen to music. So while you scrolled through your various playlists, you happened to miss the (very obvious) figure following you.
Wonwoo called out your name a few times until it finally dawned on him that you had your headphones on. He took a few long strides to catch up to you; he was very adamant on getting your attention this morning. With ease, he quickly plucked your headphones off of your head.
“What are we listening to today?” He said while adjusting the headphones on his head. It took you a second to fully process what he was doing. You knew he was doing it to provoke you, but you were determined to not let that happen today. So to his surprise, you simply kept walking. You figured that he would continue with his antics if you gave him the reaction that he wanted so you did the opposite, you ignored him.
What shocked him the most was seeing you pull out an old pair of earbuds and plugging them into your phone. He was dumbfounded to say the least, how were you so prepared and why were you ignoring him?
And again, he quickly caught up with a few simple steps. He took your headphones off of his head and tapped them against your shoulder.
With a tired sigh, you turned around to face him but couldn’t help but admire his face. You really didn't want to lose that ‘expressionless’ look you were going for (to help you ignore him of course), but that small smile of his was enough to crack you down. It's like he knew that it was your one weakness when it came to him. This was the most annoying part of it all. Anytime he smiled or looked at you, a tiny part inside you secretly liked it, making you crave his attention at times.
Objectively speaking, Wonwoo was very handsome. That was something you could never deny, you would even go as far as to say that he was your type but you didn't particularly like the people he called his ‘friends’ so you were stuck in a weird limbo.
“Is there something on my face, birdy?”
You scoffed at the nickname. “I told you not to call me that.”
Wonwoo’s eyes were looking straight into yours, a smirk slowly creeping up to his lips. It didn't help that he was looking really good today either, his messy hair combined with the whole biker fit did wonders for your eyes. He was about to say something before you heard your ringtone go off, evidently cutting him off.
Oh.
It was Hyunwoo. That's odd... you finished your shared project with him rather early, what could he be calling you about? Either way, you answered the random call in front of a rather annoyed Wonwoo.
"Hello?"
"Heyyy yn, I was wondering if you wanted to get lunch later today?" You couldn't help but feel your eyes widen at his sudden question. Since when did he want to hang out with you? Last time you checked he had a plethora of girls that he was talking to... maybe he was interested in you? No, you shouldn't get too ahead of yourself...
"Um... let me check if I have anything to do first. Can I call you back?" You knew that you sounded nervous but how else were you supposed to feel when the cute guy from your physics class was literally asking you to eat lunch with him?
As soon as you ended the call, you felt Wonwoo's arm snake its way down to your waist. You couldn’t help but yelp at the sudden intimate contact. Chuckling at your reaction, he leaned down, closer to your ear. “Who was that?”
"No one." You stated simply, it wasn't his business anyway.
"Hm, okay," Wonwoo rested his head on your shoulder, continuing to speak lowly in your ear. "I'll remember that birdy."
Before you could even come up with something to counter him, he decided to speak up once again.
"Well, I do have something rather important to tell you." His voice was so calm and soothing, you could honestly listen to it for hours on end if you had the chance.
"What is it?" You hoped he couldn't sense your rather, embarrassing, curiosity.
"Heard you used to have a little crush on me," his voice was evidently smug, knowing that this would surely get a rise out of you.
Which it did.
Your face burned at the memories of when you used to have a crush on Wonwoo. But, that had to be in fourth grade… so how could he have known about that? Nonetheless, you scoffed at his statement, not wanting to know that you were a little embarrassed by the sudden reminder.
“Key word, had,” you rolled your eyes at him. This did make you curious though, who could have possibly told him that? So you asked him exactly that.
“How do you even know about that?” His smile never faltered even as you lightly pushed his hand away from your waist. If anything, this made him want to touch you even more.
“I have my ways,” he stated simply. Of course, he does. You hated when he would shrug things off, now this was going to bother you for the entire week!
One thing about Wonwoo was that he has always been curious about you, this interest stemming back all the way to your elementary days. This curiosity eventually intensified in junior year of high school when you began to show your blatant distaste towards him. He just had to get to know you.
He looked down at you, his face was unreadable like always. You never knew what was going on in that mind of his.
"Why are you here? Shouldn't you be hanging out with your actual friends?" Sometimes you couldn't help but blurt out your thoughts to him even if they sounded a bit rude. His face faltered for a split second, probably caught off guard by the random question. Shoot, you really didn’t mean to say that out loud. Although, it looks like Wonwoo didn’t take any offense to your sudden question. If anything, it made him... smile?
“I am hanging out with my friend,” he stopped you to face him, “which is you.” You rolled your eyes at him. That had to be the corniest thing he has ever said to you if you were being honest. You just hated that giddy feeling he would give you any time he said something remotely cheesy.
"Ugh, you're so dumb," you groaned while checking the time on your phone. It was getting close to noon and you hadn't responded to Hyunwoo's question from earlier. Maybe it was best if you didn't go... who knows what he wanted from you. If you were being completely honest, you didn't know if you had it in you to see other people at the moment, aside from Wonwoo of course.
"Have somewhere to be?" Wonwoo asked, a hint of concern peeking through his voice.
"No, thank god, but I do have a scheduled nap to get to so if you don't mind-" you were cut off by the sound of an engine revving, making your body jump at the unexpected noise. You turned to see where the source of the commotion was coming from but then realized it was coming from a group of bikers nearby; most likely Wonwoo's friends.
Or so you thought?
Wonwoo didn't seem too pleased with the group that was getting closer to where the two of you were. On the contrary, Wonwoo looked pissed. His jaw was visibly clenched, the gentle grip he had on your waist tightened, and his eyes lost that playful spark he had earlier. You couldn't help but feel guilty for thinking about how hot Wonwoo looked when he was angry. Of course, you would never want to be on the receiving end of his anger but seeing it on the sidelines was quite... interesting.
Wait. This might actually be serious, so it's best if you leave before anything crazy happens.
"I think I'm going to head out now..." you said quietly as you tried to slip away from Wonwoo's (awfully) strong grasp.
He turned to look at you, his eyes softening once they landed on your figure. Why did they have to come and bother him at this exact moment? He knew that whatever was going to happen was not going to be pretty, but he found himself reluctant to let you go.
Before truly letting you go, he quietly asked, "Are you sure? I can take you home if you want me to." As soft as his voice was, he still managed to sound composed which was comforting considering the situation.
You nodded in response, "I don't live that far from here so it's fine, thank you for the offer though." You managed to flash him a small, awkward smile before turning away from him and heading toward the direction of your apartment. You didn't know what exactly was going on between those guys and Wonwoo but it for sure wasn't friendly. Although it wasn't exactly your issue, you couldn't help but feel worried about Wonwoo, even if he was a pain in the ass sometimes.
Tumblr media
Much to your dismay, that scheduled nap never came your way that day.
You blame Wonwoo, how were you supposed to sleep peacefully knowing he was probably getting jumped? Okay, you might be jumping to conclusions but what else were you supposed to think about when he was visibly angry at the mere sight of those guys?
Realistically speaking, it's only been two days since that whole incident happened. Granted, you haven't seen Wonwoo since then but that could mean a lot of things.
[...]
While you were in line to get a smoothie from one of the pop-up shops near the campus, you felt a sudden tap on your shoulder.
"Did my little birdy miss me?" You felt Wonwoo say right next to your ear, his breath fanning across your earlobe. It sent a wave of tingles down your spine, making you shudder in turn. Though you weren't a fan of his spontaneous appearance.
"God, you need to stop doing that! I almost slapped you I swear-" You stopped mid-way once you turned around and saw his face. He had a few cuts on his lips and eyebrows and one big bruise across his cheek. Those guys really did a number on him.
Your eyebrows furrowed in concern, "are you okay?"
He tried to wave it off but you could tell he was bothered by your question, "It's fine, really, don't worry about it." Was he insane? How were you not going to worry when he was visibly injured?
"Were these from the guys on Tuesday?" You couldn't help but ask, where else would he get these cuts and bruises if it didn't come from them?
His demeanor immediately switched and he pushed himself away from you.
"It's none of your business so stay out of it."
"Okay." That was the only thing you said before grabbing your smoothie from the worker and quickly walking away from the shop. If he wanted to be like that then so be it. You most definitely were not going to wait for him to 'open up' by all means, he could throw himself a pity party for all you care.
"Wait-" He tried reaching for your arm but you were too quick for him. Your steps were swift, helping you create a reasonable distance between you and Wonwoo. He called out your name a few times before giving up, he didn't want to gather any unwanted attention from the people nearby. Reaching your pace, Wonwoo was finally close enough to grab your wrist and make you look at him.
"Are you seriously ignoring me?" His voice was a bit jagged, no doubt coming from the unexpected cardio you made him do to catch up to you.
Unfortunately for him, you were petty. "You said it wasn't my business, so please do not talk to me because I really do not care." You brushed past him once again this time making sure he could not grab your arms or wrists.
He exhaled in annoyance, "Look I'm sorry-" Wonwoo was mid-apology before being abruptly cut off by the voice of a guy yelling your name out loud.
Speaking of the devil, what immaculate timing.
"Hey yn! Did you still want to get food after class?" Hyunwoo jogged to where you were standing but saw how Wonwoo was still trying to talk to you.
"Sorry, were you busy with him?"
You instantly responded to Hyunwoo, "No, he was just asking for directions, but yeah I'm down for food." Like before, you made your way towards Hyunwoo, making sure to bump into Wonwoo. He couldn't help but stay frozen in place as he watched you walk to class with some random guy, jealousy slowly invading his mind.
Directions? Did she really...?
As much as Wonwoo wanted to be mad at you, he really had no one to blame but himself. The whole situation with his old group of 'friends' was really getting to him so once you popped that question it just seemed to send him over the edge. He just didn't know how far you would go to express your annoyance towards him. Now all he had to do was find a way to properly apologize to you before that Hyunwoo guy got to you first.
The only thing stopping him? He didn't have your number or any of your socials...
Part Two: Coming soon...
Tumblr media
1K notes · View notes
kianely · 6 months
Text
”YOU SEND ME RIGHT TO HEAVEN”
Tumblr media Tumblr media
i. PAIRING — Leon Kennedy x GN!Reader
ii. SYNOPSIS — Fresh out of police academy, Leon heads back to his hometown to crash with his best friend before he has to move to Raccoon City. The only problem is, you’re there too — his best friend’s sibling. He has been harboring feelings for you for years, so being under the same roof as you rekindles some emotions he wasn’t able to bury. You were in a similar position.
iii. CONTENT — MDNI, 18+, mutual feelings + confessions, fluff, kissing, making out, brief mentions of masturbation, blowjob (Leon receiving), lube, fingering (reader receiving), penetrative sex, protection, consent checks, aftercare, you just graduated college (so around same age as him), banter, he’s like the boy next door, late night car ride, he’s kinda cliche and throws a rock at your window, no mention of parents, I tried to make this more dialogue heavy woo, in Grammarly I trust, let there be no typos
iv. WC — 8.6k
Tumblr media
Leon drummed his fingers against the leather fabric of his steering wheel, humming along to the song playing in his car. He was excited, parked outside of his old high school’s friend house — which by extension, was your house too.
He was fresh out of police academy, a soon-to-be rookie at the Raccoon City Department. He packed some bags with enough of his belongings and drove back to his hometown, wanting to spend some time with his good and most trusted pal before he settled down in a new city and focused on his work.
He took his keys off the ignition, got off, and got his bags. His hands were full when he walked up to the front door, so he rang the doorbell with his elbow. For some reason, he felt a tad bit nervous. He’d seen your brother maybe over six months ago, but he hadn’t been inside the place in a while, maybe a few years.
When the door began to open, he was almost ready to say your brother’s name. Instead, he was greeted with a special someone he hadn’t expected to see. You.
Leon nearly dropped his bags. He hadn’t seen you in a couple of years because you decided to dorm at a university. Right. Yes. You must’ve graduated by now.
“Leon?”
God, your voice almost made his jaw slacken. He loved hearing his name come out of your lips.
He didn’t even get a chance to respond — managing to keep his ground when you stepped out to hug him. “It’s so good to see you! It’s been what, like two years already?”
“Woah — yeah, yeah…something like that. It’s really good to see you too.”
You made his heartbeat spike. Your arms around him, the way you leaned against him. Granted, he was standing somewhat stiffly because he was holding his bags. But…he couldn’t resist you — he let them drop onto the patio floor with a couple of thumps before he wrapped his arms around you. He tried to do so in the most platonic way possible, fearing he’d see the light if your brother happened to join the scene.
Leon had a thing for you. Always had. Always will.
He was too scared to do a damn thing about it, in his eyes, you were simply off limits. Like a forbidden fruit, a temptation that couldn’t be indulged in without some sacrifice.
He let his arms linger back to his sides when you pulled away, and he sucked in a breath.
“Come on in,” you flashed him that gleaming smile of yours as you reached for one of his bags to help him out. “My brother’s upstairs cleaning up his room. He said he’s setting up a bed for you…I think.”
“Yeah, he wouldn’t let me take the couch. Said he wanted me to be his roommate, so it’ll be just like old times.”
Leon was hit with a wave of nostalgia as he took a look at the interior, it looked exactly like he remembered. Not much had changed, aside from the addition of some photos, a wall-mount TV instead of a TV stand, and other small details here and there.
“You’ve changed a lot. In a good way.” You spoke up.
“Have I?”
“Yeah, I mean, just look at you.”
He looked down at himself. Shirt. Jacket. Shoes. A similar style as before. And he knew his hair wasn’t any different. What were you getting at?
He then looked back at you.
Oh.
Your eyes were practically glued to his arms. Have you always blatantly checked him out like this? Suddenly, he felt a wave of heat wash over him. The worst part is, you seemed genuinely curious — not like you were ogling him, but as if asking: Wow? Where’d those guns come from?
“It was all the drills at the police academy.” He knew that you knew that, which led him to believe that the point of your observation was to subtly compliment him. “The amount of training was pretty brutal, but I’m ready for the job.”
“I’m sure you are. I heard you graduated at the top ten percent of your class, that’s pretty cool!” You were being genuine, he could hear it in your voice since it went to a slightly higher-pitched tone.
The playful nudge you gave his shoulder made the ends of his eyes crinkle, he loved it when you did that — it reminded him of how things were back then when he visited often, the way you’d nudge him or even ruffle his hair whenever you were happy or excited over his accomplishments. It made him feel seen.
“It was nothing,” he was humble, as usual. “It has just always been my dream.”
“I know…I’m really proud of you, Leon.”
The way you attached his name to the praise just made it sound all the more personal, the tips of his ears felt like they were burning. He bashfully rubbed the nape of his neck. “Uh thanks, I really appreciate that. It means a lot coming from you.”
Leon had always been a complete sweetheart with you. He was the epitome of ‘the boy next door’. He had fond memories of trying to muster up the courage to ask you to be his Valentine’s during high school — the two of you attended the same one and were a year off from one another, so he saw you around. Again though, he didn’t want to ruin his friendship with your brother…so he never asked.
He thought about driving over to your house and throwing a pebble at your window to get your attention, and he’d be holding a bouquet in his hands. Just a daydream, but a fun one to look back on nevertheless. He always gave you presents on your birthday and Christmas, nothing too grand so he wouldn’t get your brother suspicious, but just enough so he could see you light up as you unwrapped the gift.
“Are those your graduation photos?” He took notice of some polaroids splayed out on the coffee table, ones with you with a cap and gown.
“Yeah, feel free to look at them.”
Leon wished he could’ve watched you walk the stage. Yeah, he attended your high school one, but he would’ve liked to see the college one too. Maybe he’d ask if any of your family or friends took a video later. There was a goofy grin on his face the entire time he looked through them.
He was so absorbed that he didn’t even hear the footsteps down the stairs, nor the chuckle you let out before your brother playfully pulled him into a chokehold.
“Dude, really? How are you going to be part of the force like this?”
Leon swatted your brother away with a roll of eyes, all out of love of course — he easily maneuvered out of the half-assed chokehold. “Cut me some slack, I was a little distracted.”
“Yeah, that’s kind of the problem. Don’t you have to be attentive and shit?”
That right there was your sign to leave — your brother was really close with Leon, and you wanted to give them time to catch up. After all, you’d probably be bumping into Leon a lot since he was going to be staying for a couple of days.
Leon hated the way his eyes trailed over to your form as you made your way upstairs. He’s supposed to be paying attention to your brother, so why were you clouding his thoughts? With a very small physical shake of head, he redirected his attention to your brother, nodding along as he listened in to his chit-chatter and caught up with everything that had happened in his hometown.
But in the back of his mind, he knew he was screwed.
Tumblr media
You wanted to bury your face against your pillow and scream. How were you supposed to act now that your high school crush was here? Your brother’s best friend. The one you had always dreamed of dating. That was a long time ago. But even in college, you always longed to see him again — to grab lunch and coffee with him and then show him around your campus with your hand in his.
Leon popped into your head whenever you dipped your hand underneath your waistband to relieve your urges. Your stomach bubbled with craving when you felt pent up late at night, even if you tried to think of someone else, Leon was always in your mind whenever you came and muffled your noises into your pillow.
No amount of people you saw in college even came close to Leon.
He had gotten so much stronger. When he hugged you earlier…you could feel his bulging biceps and noticed how much broader his shoulders were. You were sure his pecs were in solid condition too, it made you want to bury your head between them. He had always been fit, but you knew damn well you’d see a six-pack if he took off his shirt.
So for his sweet self to be just a walking distance away was pretty overwhelming. You could handle a day, maybe even two, but as far as you know, he was going to be staying longer. Not as long as a week, but still enough to have you worrying.
It had been four hours since he arrived. You could faintly hear some laughter. That wasn’t a surprise though, your brother’s room was just across the hall from yours.
That's it. No more. You were going insane.
You got up and played some music, not too loud, just enough to drown the other sounds out. It was dark outside now, you opened up the window to let some of the breeze in to ventilate your room.
It was going just fine until you fast-forward to half an hour later.
A familiar set of knocks distracts you from your worries. Wait, never mind. The one behind the knocks was the cause of your worries.
You lowered the volume of your music a bit and took a very quick look in the mirror to make sure you looked okay before opening the door.
Leon leaned against your door frame, just casually — like he didn’t know just how pretty he looked right now. In his defense, you knew he probably didn’t. He had always been a little dense about all that.
“Hey.”
“...Hey.”
His awkwardness was a part of his charm.
“Does my brother need something or?”
“Oh, no. Uh, one of his coworkers called him and I felt a bit neglected, so here I am.”
Don’t you know it? If you had a penny for the amount of times your brother had paced around the entire house getting into a heated conversation over work gossip, you’d have enough to pay off your student debt.
“Trust me, those phone calls can last hours.” You walked back to sink into your bed with a contended grunt, making a hand gesture for him to come in.
Why would you do that? Being in a closed space with him wasn’t a good idea considering all the thoughts spinning in your head.
Leon had never really entered your room, at least not for over a couple of minutes. He didn’t know where to sit despite there being many surfaces: the window seat, your desk chair, the floor, the beanbag you had, your bed, no — out of the question.
“Don’t be so stiff,” you teased, finding the way he looked a bit out of place a little cute. “Sit anywhere you like.”
He laughed before heading over to the window seat. “Just don’t want to be intrusive.”
“You? As if.”
Leon took an in-depth look around — posters of shows and bands, little collections of trinkets, old textbooks, scattered papers on your desk, diplomas and awards plastered on your wall, stickers on the cover of your laptop, a corner with some of your hobbies, a counter with your personal products. It seemed so…you. So naturally, he liked it. It was cozy.
And God, it smelled like you too. It made him dizzy. In a way, it was comforting, like the scent he’d get whenever you passed by him or when the two of you briefly hugged. Though at the same time, his mind was also pulled toward a more inappropriate direction. He’d be able to drown in your scent if you let him bury his face against the crook of your neck so he could nip at your skin and make you a purring mess in his arms.
The idea of being so physically close to you to the point your fragrance and scent rubbed off on his clothes afterward? Now that had his blood rushing straight to the gutter.
You felt nervous, aware of his moving eyes — you were glad the attention wasn’t directly on you, you tried to continue casually scrolling on your phone despite the way your heart was hammering.
“Better than my brother’s room?”
“Mm, I don’t know about that.”
“Pftt, you’re just biased.”
He didn’t have a rebuttal for that, merely shrugging as his eyes continued their exploration. Eventually, he caught sight of something familiar sitting on top of your nightstand — a set of headphones he had gifted you. He always knew how much you loved music, so he had gotten that for you a long time ago.
“You still have those?”
“Hm?” You followed his gaze, and your lips tugged into a smile as you reached over to dangle them in the air for him to see more properly. “Duh! Actually…they stopped working a couple of months back, but they lasted me a pretty long time.”
With the ice broken, Leon felt more comfortable. He went over to sit down on your bed. He wasn’t questionably close to you, but he was manspreading so his knee nearly grazed against yours.
“Is there any use in keeping a pair of broken headphones around?”
“Uh, yes.” You said matter-of-factly as you now clutched them close to your chest, looking at them almost sentimentally. “I cherish everything that you’ve given me. These bad boys aren’t seeing a trash can anytime soon.”
Cute. Cute…Cute.
“You sure you aren’t just a hoarder?”
“Rude.”
“Just a question.”
“Yeah, a rude one.”
“You’re not denying it.”
“Whatever.”
You were killing him. Leon felt his self-restraint diminish by the second. He could mess up so easily. He wanted to confess. To kiss you. Hold your hand. Plant his lips against your forehead. Rest his head against your lap and melt as you play with his hair.
He could do it, assuming you returned his feelings. He was moving to Raccoon City soon, it’s better to not have any regrets, right? He loves your brother, but at this point screw him. Leon has been pining for you for years.
He was incredibly tempted, hanging on a thin string. But he had to know one thing first. “So, are you dating anyone? There must’ve been plenty of candidates in college.”
“Nah, I dated here and there but…nothing lasted long. It’s weird, everyone was focused on something different, so nothing ever worked out.” Because none of them were him.
“What about you?”
“No one.” He replied.
Great, you were both single.
Silence. Again. This time with occasional fleeting eye contact. Leon twiddled his thumbs, his hands resting on his lap.
You purposely shifted closer to him, enough for your thigh to press up against his a little. Wow. He hadn’t expected to feel a jolt of electricity from that.
He looked over at you more clearly this time, his eyes searched yours.
You were losing your shit, drawn to his baby blue eyes. With your nearby lamp turned on, you could see the way his cheeks progressively turned rosy. Your eyes flickered to his lips. They looked soft, as if he put lip balm on consistently. Would they feel like a pillow?
He felt like he was burning, and he nervously tugged his bottom lip between his teeth.
“You know, I’ve always found you cute.” You were the one to break the silence.
“Really?”
“Uh-huh.”
“Don’t say that.”
“Why?”
“Your brother would kill me. Take it back.”
“My brother would kill you for something I said?” You scoffed. “You’re funny.”
“You know what I meant.”
You did.
But it hurt a little. Would Leon really hold back on his feelings all because of your brother? As far as you were concerned, your brother had never told you to not go after Leon. And if that was some sort of unspoken rule…then too bad.
Leon knew you had him wrapped around your finger, he didn’t stand a chance.
“Come on, Kennedy. You’re telling me you’ve never thought about this?”
“Well, yeah…But—“
“Just one kiss, please, Leon?”
You just had to say his name, didn’t you?
One kiss. Only one. Yeah, he could work with that. No hand holding or waist holding. Just a kiss, how bad could it be?
“Just one.” He agreed, his voice a whisper.
Leon leaned in, stopping just moments before his lips touched yours. He was nervous. If he was granted even a piece of heaven, surely he’d end up craving more. But he would deal with it. He caved.
His lips gently met yours. God, your lips felt plush. It was a simple one, ending as soon as it began. But of course, it wasn’t going to end there. The two of you were already in each other’s space. The short peck wasn’t enough.
“So, two?”
“Yeah.” You placed your hand on the side of his upper neck and caressed his cheek with your thumb.
“God…” Leon folded, leaning in once more with a suave and much longer kiss this time. His body pressed against yours a little, his body heat mixing with yours.
Just a few minutes passed, and the two of you were making out — slowly and sensually. Your tongues naturally clashed against one another, no rush or doubt, just instinct. Leon tasted good, like spearmint.
“I’ve always had a thing for you,” Leon murmured the confession out in between kisses. He didn’t want you to think he was kissing you just for the hell of it, or for mere physical attraction. You were important to him, the person who harbored his thoughts for the past years of his life.
Honestly, if you weren’t underneath him like this, you might’ve reacted more incredulously. But he was kissing you so intimately, you weren’t surprised. Even so, his sincerity was sweet.
“For how long?”
Another kiss — A pause.
“Since the day your brother introduced us.” Another one. “Six years now.”
You smiled into the kiss, and it prompted him to do so as well. But eventually, you leaned back to look at him. “For the record, I’ve always liked you too. You never made a move on me though, so I thought maybe you didn’t see me that way.”
“Please. I’ve always been crazy over you.”
“Good, that’s how I like my men. Now c’mere…”
With that, the two of you continued kissing. You could scream into your pillow later once you had the chance to process the fact the man of your dreams had just confessed to you. For now though…his taste was pretty damn distracting.
What drove Leon crazy was whenever he managed to hear some quiet noises escape from you: a discreet moan into his mouth, a gasp when he snaked his hand up and down your side, an exhale when he pulled away to kiss the corner of your lips and catch his breath. He hoped you didn’t feel the way he was beginning to get a little hard, not a full-blown boner, but…you got him riled up fairly easily.
Your fingers were threading through his hair, unintentionally ruffling it up. And you figured something out fairly soon — a gentle tug on his hair made him breathless. He liked it.
The music still softly playing in your room kept the sounds of your lips smacking and occasional chatter hidden, but eventually, your mind drifted to the reason why Leon had come into your room in the first place.
“Okay, okay.” You laughed quietly, pressing your palms flat against Leon’s chest and keeping him at a distance. “I think that’s enough…my brother’s probably done with his call by now. He probably just thinks you’re in the bathroom or something.”
Leon’s breathing was a bit heavy, his lips felt all tingly from the amount of time that they had been against yours. “I forgot about that…yeah, I should get going.”
He sat up, licking his lips as if to get more of your remaining taste. He was glad you guys had stopped there, otherwise, there’d be a bulge straining against his pants — which would be pretty damn awkward.
“You’re dangerous, y’know that?” Leon sounded amused. He stood up and went over to your mirror to fix his hair up and make himself look as if he had not just been kissing his best friend’s sibling.
“What are you gonna do about it? Handcuff me?”
“I’m not officially on the job…but I might just have to.”
“Yeah, yeah. You can talk to me about the law some other time.”
Tumblr media
Two days had passed since then. Leon hadn’t had many opportunities to interact with you since your brother kept taking him out of the house to stroll around the town and reminisce on memories. Even amidst a trip down memory lane, Leon couldn’t get you off his mind. The kissing, the confession, there has to be more to the story the two of you have developed.
He couldn’t sleep all night, lying on the makeshift bed your brother had prepared for him. He tossed and turned, knowing you were just down the hallway was testing his self-restraint.
The good news? Your brother was a heavy sleeper. We’re talking…he wouldn’t wake up without many nearby alarms or without a bucket of water being poured onto him.
Leon shuffled out of his makeshift bed, threw some clothes on, grabbed his keys, wallet, and phone, headed downstairs, and then made his way outside, cringing a little at the loud creak of the door. He was going to get some fresh air and go on a drive around the neighborhood, he needed to clear his head.
Walking towards his car, he looked up at the house and noticed that one room was still all lit up even in the dead of midnight. Yours. Maybe you couldn’t fall asleep either, thinking about what happened.
He shouldn’t be thinking about throwing a small pebble at your window, but he couldn’t help it. There was a lot unsaid between the two of you. So…he threw a pebble.
With a huff, you got out of your bed to investigate what had dragged your attention from your phone. It wasn’t rare for you to hear a noise outside, but to have such a distinct sound against your window? You just wanted to be safe.
Leon saw you brush your curtain to the side, looking around before peering at him.
He felt small for some reason and motioned for you to come over, he didn’t want to yell in the middle of the quiet neighborhood. Leon leaned against the side of his car as he waited for you.
His hands felt clammy.
“Hey, what are you doing out here?” You asked. “Couldn’t sleep?”
“Yeah, I needed some fresh air. Wanna go for a drive around the neighborhood?”
“You don’t even need to ask…I can finally call shotgun.”
Leon snorted at that. He had a car during high school and would occasionally give you and your brother rides, but your brother always called shotgun (obviously, since they were best friends), so you were always stuck sitting in the back and listening in to their conversations.
“Yeah, yeah.” He unlocked his car before opening the passenger seat door for you. “In you go.”
“Thanks.”
You put your seatbelt on and then looked around his car as he got in and turned on the ignition, waiting for the car to warm up.
“So,” Leon began, looking over at you with a coy smile. “About the other night…”
God, you had been dying to talk about it. In all honesty, you were internally a little bit upset that your brother had been dragging Leon out of the house, even if that was reasonable considering their friendship. But you knew that what happened wasn’t just a one-time thing, it couldn’t be, and you wouldn’t let it.
“Yeah, uh—” You met his gaze. “ I know you’re worried because of my brother and everything but I really like you, Leon. He cares about you, and he trusts you. I don’t…I don’t think he’d be upset if we ended up together.”
“Are you sure? I really like you too, I just don’t want to ruin anything.”
“Are you kidding? He’d probably be hyped about you being his future brother-in-law.”
“Already thinking about marriage, huh?”
“I—no…shut up.”
With a roll of eyes and a grin, Leon turned his attention to reversing out of the driveway since the car was all ready to go. Yeah, he looked really damn attractive while doing that, you couldn’t resist from looking at his arms. There wasn’t anything interesting to look at outside the windows anyway, you had walked and driven by all these houses practically every day.
“So, what made you like me?”
Leon hummed in thought after you asked him that, he kept his eyes on the road, trying to find a way to sum it all up.
“Well, I remember meeting you for the first time. You were breathtaking and held yourself so well, and I was just kinda standing there not knowing what to say. I couldn’t take my eyes off of you, and I remember thinking to myself: no one else has ever made me feel this way after a first impression, you must be the one. It was complicated though, I thought you were off limits, you know…that’s just friend code. And the more and more I came over, the more I fell for you. Everything about you. I just…I dunno. I like you.”
That was his short explanation, he could go ramble for hours about why he liked you, about all the little things you do and say that make him feel like a lovestruck fool.
“The feeling’s mutual…I’ve always wanted to be with you. Like, I can actually be myself and not have to force any conversation. It’s all so natural. I really missed you throughout college.”
Leon was smiling, pearly whites showing as he continued driving.
“We could’ve been high school sweethearts. Y’know…you’re the reason all my relationships failed.” You joked, though, it wasn’t far off from the truth.
“You’re seriously gonna blame me for that?”
“Yeah, you raised my standards way too much.”
“Not my fault.”
“Yeah, it is.”
“Not.”
“Is.”
“Not.”
“Is.”
“...”
Leon knew that he would never get the final word, not when it came to you. He gave you the win.
Tumblr media
The two of you must’ve driven around for a little over half an hour before Leon parked back onto your driveway.
“Actually, there’s something else on my mind.” You told him, taking in a breath before voicing your thoughts. “You’re moving in what…like a week? So, what does that mean for us?”
If there was one thing Leon was certain about, it was that he wasn’t letting you go. No, he’d gone six long years just pining over you and not making any moves, he’d figure something out.
“We’ll make it work.”
“But you’re going to be busy. I know how important your career is to you, what if I distract you and screw something up.”
He loved that about you, you were so damn considerate.
“Not gonna happen.” He retorted, turning off his ignition before getting out of the car — going over to your side to open it for you.
He walked side by side with you to the front door, and you were still quietly yammering about how worried you were.
“Hey,” his voice was soft as he turned to face you, he cupped his hands around your face. The caring look in his eyes could cure millions. “It’s going to be okay. We’re going to be okay.”
With that, he gently kissed you, making all your worries fade instantly. You smiled and then kissed him again, tugging on the collar of his shirt to pull him closer. When you pulled back, you laughed a little before asking:
“My room?”
“Yeah.”
The minute the two of you were inside your bedroom with the door locked, you took the initiative and pushed him onto your bed. God, you adored the way his eyes fixated on you, the way his hand reached out to squeeze your hips as you got settled on top of him and captured his lips into a kiss.
A familiar makeout session, just like last time. The two of you lost track of time. But it was different this time: more steamy, a little more fast-paced — especially with the way Leon was practically squeezing all your curves, unlike last time.
“Mm.” He moaned softly, relishing the taste of your lips. His hand slid down to your ass, kneading the flesh as his breathing grew heavier. He was hard, whimpering every single time he got any friction down there.
He let his lips trail down to your neck, squeezing you a little harder when he heard you gasp.
You just about melted, your hand instinctively going to the back of his head to keep him close — the way his teeth occasionally nipped the sensitive skin was heavenly, it made you shudder and tug on his hair.
Leon was careful to not bruise your skin, just wanting to make you feel good like you made him feel.
“Oh shit, wait.” You got off him for a second, taking a quick moment to turn on some of your music. Not so loud that it would disturb anyone, but just enough to cover up your noises. “Okay…all done.”
You then repositioned yourself again. It was getting hot in the room, your hands reached down to tug your shirt off, no use for it anymore.
Leon swallowed thickly, his eyes roaming across your torso and taking every single feature in. He couldn’t resist from letting his hand wander across your bare skin, watching as goosebumps formed from his mere touch.
“You’re…” He whispered out, looking back into your eyes. “You’re so beautiful.”
“Thanks. You’re not so bad yourself.” You said in return, a grin forming on your face. You reached your hands underneath his shirt. “Can I take yours off?”
Leon nodded mindlessly, he’d let you do just about anything to him. He was getting hot under the collar. He helped you out as you took his shirt off.
You felt a tingle shoot straight down when you saw his body. Pretty. He was pretty. You pressed your hands against his pecs before sliding them down tortuously slow to his abs. Rock hard.
“You’re so muscular now,” you let your fingers trace the lines of his abs.
“Yeah.” Leon’s voice sounded a bit strained. “Police academy will do that to you.”
“I bet.” You leaned down to kiss his torso, littering kisses all over his chest, smiling against his skin whenever you caught onto the subtle incoherent mumbles of encouragement he was voicing out.
“You know what I think?”
“Hm?”
“I think…” you trailed off, your lips reaching his stomach and your hand brushing across the tent that had formed in his pants. “You need some attention down here.”
“Mm…I think you’re right. But uh, are you sure?”
Leon was a bit worried you felt pressured into this. Yeah, it would be great to go further than kissing, but he wanted you to be completely comfortable with it.
“Yeah, I want to make you feel good, if that’s okay with you.”
“It is.”
“Okay, let’s use the traffic light system, yeah?”
“Sounds good.”
Leon was breathing heavily, eyes already lidded as he watched you pull down his fly and his jeans.
Your mouth watered, you had thought about this so many times that it was almost embarrassing. You kissed along his bulge, right through the fabric. You could’ve sworn you felt it twitch a little too.
“You’re pretty excited, I haven’t even done much.”
“Oh come on, you already know you drive me insane.”
You laughed and then tugged his boxers down.
Leon hissed, his cock now exposed to your eyes. He thought about this so many times when he tugged one out, but he never imagined he would have felt a little bit self-conscious. Like, what if you thought it was ugly or something?
Quite the contrary. You adored everything about him,
“Light?”
“Green.”
You planted a kiss against his tip, a gesture that made him chuckle breathlessly.
“Seriously?”
“What? I can’t kiss it?”
“No no, you can.”
You continued placing kisses across the length of his cock, all the way down to his balls. Leon groaned, the tips of his ears started to flush. Never in his life did he think he’d get such treatment from you.
“Now you’re just being a tease.”
You could tell he was desperate by the tone of his voice. “There’s a thing called patience, maybe you should learn it.”
He was going to counter your words, but all that left his mouth was a pitiful gasp when you started licking him. The sound went straight to the spot between your legs, you really wanted to palm yourself.
“Better?”
“Yeah…that feels really good.” He placed his hand on the back of your head, practically petting you as you flattened your tongue against the underside of his cock. He tilted his head back, jaw slackened as he took shaky and shallow breaths.
His stomach tightened up when you reached the tip, swirling your tongue around the sensitive area before finally sucking him off.
“Oh — Jesus.” He’s so sensitive, not used to having such a pretty pair of lips wrapped around his cock. In an attempt to quiet himself down, he chewed on his bottom lip, but the poor guy couldn’t contain the muffled noises that spilled instead.
You were eager to please, using a hand to stroke the base of his cock and taking the rest into your mouth. The combination had him purring, his head spinning with pure want and affection for you.
His hips involuntarily bucked, catching you off guard as his tip hit the back of your throat. His free hand bunched up the fabric of your bedsheets, he couldn’t think straight, not when you were between his legs like this.
Leon hadn’t felt this way in a while, it was overwhelming. And he could feel his abdomen growing warm. Just a little over a minute and he was already close — this was much better than all his fantasies.
“Wait…I’m almost there.“ He settled his hands on your shoulders. He made the mistake of looking down, the way you were peering at him through your lashes would drive any man insane.
Leon feebly tried to push you away. It’s not because he doesn’t want you to continue, no, he’d say the safe word if that was the case. But the idea of his cum filling your mouth…well, it made him feel a little embarrassed.
You were relentless though, taking him so well in your mouth. You were drooling by now, but that did nothing to stop you, not when you were enamored by the way Leon’s thighs were shaking. You had never been so turned on.
The moment your hand fondled his balls though, he was a goner.
“I’m—” Leon couldn’t finish his sentence, hips bucking against you and stilling as he came in your mouth. His eyes rolled back, and he bit his lip harshly to not let out a window-shattering moan.
You swallowed it all, pulling away to catch your breath and lap at his cock to take any leftovers. Leon was panting at this point, trying to recover from the orgasm you had given him.
“You must have a pretty good diet.” You really had the audacity to say that when Leon was still completely fucked out, barely even registering what you were saying.
“Uh…what—”
“Don’t worry about it.”
His cheeks were burning at what you implied: he tasted good.
Leon pawed at you, tugging you up so he could eagerly kiss you. It was sloppy and uncoordinated because of how dazed he was, but you couldn’t care less.
“You did so well,” he praised you, trying to make up for the way you rendered him speechless while sucking him off. “Better than I dreamed of.”
“Trying to flatter me, are you?”
“Oh, c’mon.” He scoffed.
He switched the positions, putting your back on the mattress and settling his hips between your thighs. He was more than ready to make you feel good too.
His hand traveled all over you, across your chest and hardened nipples, across the side of your ribs, squeezed your waist, went down to grab your ass, and then returned to your waistband, fingers tugging at your waistband.
“Can I?”
“Yeah.”
After you lifted your hips to help him take your pants and underwear off, you reached over to open the top drawer of your nightstand, pulling out a bottle of lube and a condom.
Leon was relieved you were prepared, because he certainly hadn’t packed any of that for his visit, he didn’t think this would happen.
“Here, let me…” He reached for the bottle.
He put some lube on his middle and index fingers before reaching his hand back between your legs, teasing your hole a bit before very slowly sinking them in. You inhaled sharply at the coldness of it, letting out that same breath in the form of a moan.
“Is this okay?” Leon asked you, eyes watching your facial reactions to make sure the motion of his fingers weren’t causing you any discomfort. He was a little insecure of them, his training had roughened them up a bit.
“Mhm. Keep going.”
He did just that, continuing to dip them in until you eased up and they fit inside nice and snug.
He looked back down, letting out a quiet ‘oh fuck’ when you started bucking your hips up to meet his touch. God, he was so horny even after his climax, his cock beginning to harden up again.
“I can’t believe we’re doing this,” he muttered, fingering you at a gentle pace, he swallowed the saliva that built up in his mouth at the thought of being inside you.
“I can, I think we’re made for each other.”
The way you managed a smile while letting out the prettiest noises stirred up many emotions in him. He liked the vulnerability of this moment, just two people who liked each other being intimate and connecting.
“Well, I do too. Just…I dunno.” He fell silent, his gaze returning to your face and watching as it contorted into one of pleasure when he angled and curled his fingers just right.
“Right there?”
You nodded, reaching your hand down to hover it over the one he was using. “Yeah. Fuck…just like that.”
The wet sounds of his slick fingers sliding in and out of you were driving him insane, and a string of curse words left his lips. “You sound so good.”
Each flick of his wrist had you squirming around, your bed sheets wrinkling and getting all messed up. Some of the lube spilled down your thighs, you’d need to wash your sheets after this.
Leon kept going until you came, feeling his cock come fully to life at the way you moaned and spilled his name.
“Leon…” Your fingers dug into his forearms, feeling his muscles flex as he coaxed you through your orgasm. His eyes were glued to your face, biting his lip at the way your pretty eyes rolled back. He pulled his fingers out when your legs closed together in response to the overwhelming presence.
“Holy shit,” you sighed when you regained your senses, eyes fluttering open to meet his.
His lips tugged into a smile, he looked pretty proud of himself. “Felt good?”
“Better than good, but…”
“But?”
“I want more.”
“More as in…?”
Could he be more dense?
“I want you inside me.”
“Oh. Right.”
His cheeks turned red, well, redder than they already were. He ran a hand through his hair and nodded. “Do you wanna be on top or?”
You gave it some thought, reaching over for the unopened condom — there was time for both, but to start, you wanted to ride him.
“I’ll be on top.”
With the repositions all done, you straddled his hips, tearing open the condom packet. Your heart was hammering like crazy, one of your dreams was about to come true. It wasn’t just about sexual pleasure, this was the man you had liked for literal years.
Leon noticed that you seemed to be pensive while putting the condom on him. His hands settled on your hips, thumbs rubbing about the flesh.
“What are you thinking about? Talk to me.”
His caring voice pulled you from your thoughts, you shook your head and smiled.
“Just about how long I’ve wanted this. You know, being with you. I’m really happy.”
God, he adored you. “Me too.”
You aligned yourself with his cock, “Ready?”
“Yeah.”
You curled your fingers around the base of his cock to keep it stable before slowly sinking onto him. You felt the air escape from your lungs. Your jaw slackened and you let out a silent moan until you took all of him in.
“You’re going to be the death of me…” Leon gritted out. “Fuck, I didn’t think it would feel this good. You okay?”
You nodded, feeling full, the curve of your ass was against his balls. “Yeah, I think the foreplay really helped. I’m gonna start moving now.”
You put your hands against his chest and began riding him. Leon groaned in pleasure, his hands kneading your ass and helping you roll your hips. He felt bad that his fingers were digging into your skin but he couldn’t help it.
“Ah…Leon.”
Your mewls made his cock twitch inside you, his eyes rolled to the back of his skull.
He looked so pretty underneath you — his hair splayed out, a thin layer of sweat over his muscular torso, the baby blue part of his eyes almost covered now by his dilated pupils. So pretty.
Leon couldn’t take his eyes off you, not even if they threatened to shut from the way you were working him. No, they were all over you — watching the way your eyebrows were furrowed, the heave of your chest from your inconsistent breathing, how your eyes seemed glossy whenever they met his.
He reached his hand over to your chest, fingers gently pulling at one of your nipples. God, you rutted against him a bit faster at that, making him hiss and trash his head against your pillows. “Jesus…”
“Come on, say my name instead. I’m tired of hearing his.”
He laughed at that, wondering how you could even think of that at this moment. Because personally? He couldn’t come up with any banter, not with the way you were on top of him, turning a fantasy of his into a reality.
“Mm, just like that…it’s yours, all yours. I’m yours.”
Did he know how hot that was? You practically groaned just by hearing him say that. Leon thrust up to meet your hips, not missing the hiccup of your breath or the way your body almost gave out from the abrupt movement.
Honestly…having you underneath him didn’t sound all that bad right now. “Wanna switch?”
You paused your movements and nodded, happy that he asked — being on top was pretty tiring, and you knew he had the strength for it. You pulled yourself off his cock, you weren’t all that sure what he had in mind but you were eager nonetheless.
“Go for it.”
“Okay, just…” He gently maneuvered you to your back with ease. “There.”
“Show me that stamina of yours.”
He rolled his eyes, knowing you were referencing his training. “That’s going to be a little tough with you underneath me.”
He sat back on his knees and stroked himself, his eyes raking your form.
Watching him jerk himself off was hot, you could watch it all night…but, there’s always a next time. Right now? All you wanted was the intimacy of having him inside you again.
Leon bit his lip as he rubbed the head of his cock against your hole, he looked back up at you, he knew there was no way in hell he would last long. But he wasn’t embarrassed over it, he’d been waiting years, it was only natural.
Leon reached to hold one of your hands, keeping his other one on his cock to guide himself in. He took a deep breath, his stomach muscles clenching a little as he managed to get the tip in. “God…I’m definitely not gonna last in this position.”
“You’re not evenfully in yet.” You were breathless though, mind swirling at just the tip. You tried to steady your breathing and relax so he could fit without difficulty.
He laughed at that. “Yeah, yeah.”
A synchronous moan left both of you when he eventually bottomed out against you, taking a moment to get used to the feeling. He leaned down to kiss you, his hair dangling and brushing against your forehead in the process.
He hoisted your ankles over his shoulder and planted his hands beside your head, practically folding your knees to your chest. He didn’t miss the way he got hit with some of your usual fragrance, clearly, you had put some on either the back of your knees or your ankles…he wasn’t sure which one.
“Were you…anticipating this?”
“...What?” You sounded so fucked out and he wanted to laugh.
He chuckled. “Nothing.”
He chose to keep his newfound knowledge to himself for now. He kissed your somewhat sweaty forehead before starting a rhythm with his hips. Your walls were squeezing him, making him a panting mess against the shell of your ear.
You ran your fingers through his hair, tugging and pulling at it whenever one of his thrusts hit deeper than the others.
His hand found your free one, interlacing his fingers with yours. He sighed contentedly at the way you immediately squeezed his hand. He liked this, being close to you.
“Leon…” You moaned his name out, making a jolt of electricity shoot straight through all his nerves. His thrusts got faster, the sound of skin-to-skin contact intermingling with the light music playing in your room.
“Feeling good? Yeah, you’re taking it so well…I’m gonna be thinking about this for months.” He murmured the praise against your skin, kissing your ear before making his way down your neck.
Your reaction was immediate, clenching down on him and gasping, nails digging into his scalp. Hearing such praise come from Leon? God, it drove you insane.
Leon grunted, leaving open-mouthed kisses against your neck like a starved man. He could tell you were close, and he wanted to bring you over the edge of ecstasy — to coax an orgasm out of you before he spilled into his condom.
“I’m close…” you mumbled out, your eyes fluttering shut as you gave into the feeling, Leon was taking the lead, you didn’t have to worry about a single thing.
“I know,” he met your lips for a kiss, grunting and whimpering into your mouth with each snap of his hips. “Me too.”
He kept his pace the same, knowing it was getting you to approach your climax.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck…” his words were quiet, a little high pitched too, he could feel you holding his hand so tight that your fingers were leaving indents against the back of it.
“Please,” Leon pleaded. “Come on my cock…I need it.”
Your body started feeling tingly, your back arching and your hips trying to buck against him in pursuit of the feeling. You were right there.
“Leon! Leon…” Your head tipped back into your pillow. “I’m coming.”
He felt you squeeze him, your body trembling and twitching against him as he continued thrusting against you in your moment of bliss. But he didn’t last either, hips stuttering when he came inside the condom, feeling his cock get all warm from it.
“Oh…” Leon let out a guttural groan, followed by some whimpers of your name as he stilled inside you — slumping his body against yours, burying his head against your shoulder, and sloppily kissing the area.
The two of you stayed like that until you recomposed yourselves, your breathing pattern returning to normal. Leon mustered up the strength to prop himself back up, pulling out of you with a with a small whimper.
“Hey,” he whispered, a grin on his face as he kissed your cheek.
“Hey yourself.” You told him back, watching as he got up with a noise of complaint to take off the condom and throw it into the trash can.
“Come back here,” you laughed out, extending your arms for him.
“I am, I just didn’t wanna make a mess on your bed.” He came back over, laying down on his side and pulling you close.
“You already did, doofus.”
You turned to your side too. You could deal with the mess on your bedsheets later.
Leon held you close, slowly running his fingertips along your spine, leaving goosebumps in their wake. He kissed the top of your head and stayed like that for a few minutes. Just in each other's arms — letting your bodies calm down after the rush of pleasure and overwhelming emotion.
Leon’s body felt warm to the touch, he would make a really good blanket, a personal heater. You rubbed your hands across his shoulder blades, occasionally letting your nails scratch the skin lightly.
“How are you feeling?” Leon asked, reaching a hand to cup the side of your face, rubbing his thumb against your cheekbone.
“I feel really good,” you murmured, a lazy smile on your face, still feeling a rush of affection for him after the moment ended. “Everything about this feels perfect, I am a little sleepy though. You?”
“Same here.” He returned the sentiment, internally giddy about how everything had unfolded in the last few days. He couldn’t resist kissing you — just a sweet and simple one before pulling back.
“Need anything? A cup of water or something?”
Now that you think about it, your mouth feels kinda dry.
“Maybe a glass of water?”
“Mm,” Leon nodded. “Got it, I’ll be back.”
He kissed your forehead and then got up, putting on his boxers and pants (despite how uncomfortably sticky it felt) and quietly headed downstairs to grab two glasses of water and a small snack too — he knew his way around the house, so it was no big deal.
You wanted his body warmth again, rolling over to the side of the bed that he had been on to feel it once more.
Eventually, you heard the door creak open — revealing Leon, who had a sweet smile on his face as he shut it. He set down a bowl of fruit on your nightstand and then sat on your bed, handing you the glass of water you requested
“Miss me?” You asked, teasingly. You sat up.
“Oh yeah, big time.”
He laughed, the corners of his eyes crinkling. He brought his cup of water to his lips, letting out a refreshed sigh after taking some gulps. You had him moaning and panting so much that he was sure his lips would get all chapped.
Leon gently coaxed your legs over his extended ones, caressing them.
“So…” Leon cleared his throat, “I never properly asked.”
“Asked what?”
He had a hopeful look in his eyes, a goofy grin on his face as he asked:
“Can I be your boyfriend?”
952 notes · View notes
harleehazbinfics · 3 months
Note
ermm ermmm ,,,,, , cannibal!reader has like a sad past right (i saw u mention they were abused hence the obsession w approval) ,, well okay what if the hotel residents found out? like ... idk one of reader’s parents shows up at the hotel ... idk , honestly i just really love how you write cannibal reader theyre wildly silly
Crazy for you!
--- cannibal chef m.list
a/n: AWWW THANK YOU SO MUCHHH they/she is indeed very silly, i most of my inspo from myself and other fans of alastor and their reactions lmao. ive been stuck on one fanfic for days i gave up today and words just flowed for cannibal chef reader, i can't--. also plsplspls if you find any of this triggering pls turn back, i want all of you to be in a safe space.
warnings: abusive mother, shaming choice of clothing, weight shaming, typical asian behavior of 'be a doctor or lawyer' but rudeness level maxed out, being called ungrateful, useless etcetc DISCLAIMER: Any scenarios are entirely fictional and have no direct relation to any person and taken from behaviours I see, read or hear from. Thank you. word count: 1292
Tumblr media
You, Alastor, Niffty, Husk, Angel and Sir Pentious got together and were enjoying a lazy weekend just lounging around the parlor just enjoying each other's company and talking amongst each other. The lot of them fitting on the couch and the floor. You stood beside Alastor sitting on a chair by himself drinking his coffee indulging himself in a casual conversation.
You all turn your heads when the door opens expecting to see Vaggie and Charlie, preparing to greet them and get them to join you all. However, they stop in themselves from doing so when they see the both of them touring a person in.
Your constant smile drops at the sight of her. You immediately recognize the face and voice making you slowly and quietly hid behind the chair Alastor making yourself small as to not catch their attention. Alastor, of course, notices this action and raises his eyebrow.
"And this is Angel and Sir Pentious our other guest, Niffty our cleaning maid and Husk our bartender. Alastor here is the host of the hotel, he's the who supported all our endeavors!" Charlie states.
"Oh! Isn't that the Radio Demon? Dear it is him! I'm a big fan of yours," your mother mooches at Alastor earning a displeased static sound from him when she abruptly shook his hand without his permission.
"Alastor, where's (y/n)? Aren't they always with you?" Charlie asks making you cringe as you cautiously walk towards them.
"(Y/n)? Is that you?" your mother asks in disbelief before enveloping you in a hug, which made you sick to your stomach. "Oh gosh! It's been years! Look at you! You look so skanky with that clothing. You also look like you've gained weight. I told you not to go to culinary school and be a doctor or lawyer instead. You look so fat now, probably from all that meat you're eating. You should've gone vegan look how your Aunt Karen slimmed down, she's been going around and teaching, crazy bitch. Anyway, take my luggage to my room, I need to talk to everyone here. Good? Great."
You tried to get a word in with dejected eyes but lose your voice when she gives you harsh glare. You sigh and take her bags and answered, "Yes mother."
Without you noticing, all the others went deathly silent as they watch you look so sad. Your almost permanent smile disappeared from your face making them surprised and worried. You always smiled around them, mimicking Alastor's grin that was plastered on your face. Sure, they've seen you drop the smile when you were separated with Alastor before but eventually you opened up to them and was seen constantly socializing and smiling around them making them feel relieved being the youngest of all of them, but they never seen you look so sad before. Coupled with the backhanded comments made by your mother, they couldn't help but feel hostile.
Indeed, you were crazy and a bit of a monster, but you were the sweetest most thoughtful thing that ever happened to them. Any occasion was prepared by you ranging from the Hotel's Anniversary, Birthdays and even as miniscule as just a mission accomplished on their rehabilitation program. This encouraged everyone to do better with how much faith you put in them. (That and your cooking is so out of this world that even Angel would dial his drug intake from a 15 to a 13 for a treat.)
So, when your sweet and genuine smile faded, they glared at the perpetrator that made you react so drastically. However, in respect for Charlie they held their tongue first.
"Sooo, what's your relationship with (y/n)?" Charlie asks trying to be polite despite the tense atmosphere.
"Oh, her? She's my daughter. Ungrateful little wench, I took care of her her whole life and the thanks I get is her running away home. Next thing I know she's in a boarding school for taking culinary classes. Where'd that bitch even get that money, she should've paid everything he owed to us first! Her parents! Say, can you make me a drink Whiskers? Just thinking of that bitch makes my head hurt. Make it snappy," she orders around slumping onto a vacant seat making herself very at home.
"Don't call me Whiskers, only my friends get to call me that. And I ain't taking shit from you," Husker replies turning his back at her.
She gasps dramatically and yells, "You call this hospitality?!"
She stands up trying to reach Husk, Angel stands in between them along with Pentious and Niffty before a black tendril shoots out from the ground wrapping around her.
"This is where I draw the line," Vaggie growls pointing her spear at your mother.
"What? You actually like that girl? Pft, what the fuck's that all about. She's ungrateful and good for nothing. You actually like someone as useless as her?" your mother laughs at the protective group, her eyes widen as she sees Charlie change into her demon form.
Alastor gently pushes her behind him stopping her in her tracks. He says, "I'll handle this. This obviously concerns my closest companion so this will fall into my hands."
Your mother scrutinizes him finding his tone and gesture quite odd then her eyes lighten up in recognition. She laughs at him and yells, "You can't be serious! You like that--"
She gets cut off as the tendril wraps around her mouth and drags you in his shadow, ceasing her muffled screams. As soon as she disappears, you come down finding all of them but your mom.
"Where's my mom?"
"Sheeee changed her mind! Yeah! She told us that she had something to do," Charlie lies between her teeth with an anxious look in her eyes making Vaggie elbow her despite her doing the same.
"Oh, I see," you say still not smiling, "Will she come back? Her things are still here."
"Nah. She ain't comin' back, sweet cheeks. She's got better shit to do apparently and wanted us to drop off her stuff on an address," Angel casually lies beckoning her to sit with them petting your head after.
Husk nudges Pentious making him confused for a while before getting the message, answering, " Y-yes! I will do it right now. Eggbois! Take the woman's things outside the hotel!"
While the little eggs tottered to do their master's bidding your eyes slowly light up but not fully their yet.
"Look kid, we won't prod into your business but know if you ever need someone to talk to, you've got a bartender right here," Husk jokes with a grin holding onto his suspenders in a pose making you slightly giggle.
"Hey, hey you got us too!" Angel, Charlie, Niffty and Pentious (that got back from telling them to throw the old bat's shit into the garbage) joined in earning a smile from Vaggie and Alastor.
After you felt better, you called in for the day and left to your rooms. After escorting Alastor to his room he snags you inside then comes in close before petting your head tenderly.
You look at him surprised, although without your normal heart eyes that you give him, confused at his actions.
He brushes his fingers against your cheek electrifying you and states, "Whenever you get into trouble, tell me. I'll handle it myself, after all you are mine."
Your eyes shape into hearts, legs turning into jelly, heart beating faster and faster by the millisecond, trying to comprehend the weight of his words and engraving them into your brain.
"Understood?" he asks pleased with your reaction.
"Yes, Sir~" you breathed out finding yourself flushed red, breath hot and heavily.
"Good," he smiles devilishly.
(I'll leave the ending as ambiguous 😌)
Tumblr media
528 notes · View notes
Text
Jumping on the bandwagon woo-hoo
no spam reblog or spam comment ;P
For every 100 reblogs I'll drink another bottle of water
Update: Ive drank almost 2 whole water bottles in the last 3 days which isn't much proportionally but for one, I'd probably not even drink one if it wasn't for the internet critters in my phone telling me to and also, yk, thats alot of water compared to my last few weeks getting all my fluids from food
10 reblogs: Go to bed before midnight tonight
50 reblogs: I'll make my bed in the mornings for a week
Update: I found out that my bed being made kinda stresses me out for some reason, it's just so neat I get scared, and so instead I am putting away 3 pieces of clothing that have been clean for months and i just haven't touched every morning :D
75 reblogs: I'll work on getting accommodations for my autism at school
Update: I don't have the required "proof of diagnosis" and I'd have to wait 2 years or so to get it and I won't be in school anymore at that point, so I'm working with my counselors to see what they can do aside from official autism accommodations
125 reblogs: I'll work in upping my failing grade in math
Update: Math test retake on the 12tg, wish me luck!
150 reblogs: I'll work on my dopamine addiction and get help
Update: Hooooooly shit addictions are hard. I'm going to start a timer for time between uses of YouTube shorts or Instagram reels in an effort to reduce my need for instant gratification and try to replace every time I pick my phone up with drawing or reading or talking to people around me.
200 reblogs: I'll post my art that I've been self conscious about posting
Update: I am really happy for this, it's finally an excuse for me to make myself post my art :D it's probably gonna be 1-2 drawings per post with a little background with each :3
300k reblogs: I'll start cleaning up my room
400k reblogs: I'll clean out my bag (God pls don't get to 400 yall T T)
500: I'll get sharp objects out of my room
1k reblogs: I'll be really happy :0
Edit; Added more goals
2k reblogs: I'll start streaming on twitch again!!!
3k reblogs: I'll empty out my drafts
5k: I come out as trans to my parents (I don't know if they're transphobic so to speak, but they are of the mindset that "do whatever you want once you're out of our house but until then you are our kid" but I wanna be like um no actually-)
5.5k: I come out as trans to my non-transphobic grandma
6k: I come out as trans to my transphobic grandma
Edit 2; Yo same picture of the earth reblogged me?!? the picverse found this?!?! that's insane xd
Edit 4; I added some coming out goals because I'm not gonna do it if I don't have the pressure from hundreds of little things in my phone cheering me on xd
Pinging moots so there's at least a small chance of any of these happening xd
@calimewzz @annotated-catastrophe @glitched-out-dusk @life-is-okay-rn
308 notes · View notes
chrisevansonly · 7 months
Text
𝐖𝐢𝐥𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐅𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫
𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: charles leclerc x female reader
𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: life is too heavy to carry, thankfully your boyfriend will carry it with you
𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: talks of mental health and suicidal thoughts, mentions of depression, heavy topics so please read at your own discretion
𝐚/𝐧: i’ll be honest this is self indulgent and i know i said i wasn’t writing but idk i feel so low and thought writing about how im feeling might help? ive struggled with mental illness my whole life so i find writing it out in a way i can enjoy helps…i hope it helps others that are in need of it too<3
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Life is painful, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise, it’s dark and gloomy, heavy and hard to carry, life is painful. Okay well maybe not for everyone but for you it was, and it was draining, exhausting really trying to survive each day instead of living like everyone else. Truth be told you’d struggled with mental illness for as long as you can remember. In high school the suicidal thoughts came into play and you had fallen into a place no one deserved to fall.
You’d hear people tell you to smile, cheer up, get outside and take in the fresh air, but they don’t understand. They don’t get the internal pain one feels when they deal with depression and anxiety, unless you live it: you don’t get it.
So yes, life was painful but there was an ounce of sunshine in your life and it came in the form of Charles, your boyfriend of exactly three years. The man who broke through the storm to bring you blue skies and calm waters, the man who held you tightly as you cried for a break, aching for a moment of peace within yourself. Charles was a gift, you were sure of it: he was too.
“my love…?”
His voice was soft, delicate as it filtered through the dark bedroom, eyes filled with concern as he looked at you huddled under the blankets, almost willing them to swallow you whole
“hmm?”
It might not have been a word but Charles would take it
“can I get you anything? do you need something?”
The room fell silent again except for the sound of covers shifting, your head peaking over the duvet
“y-you please”
Hearing your voice break was enough for Charles to promptly move from his place in the doorway, lifting up the covers on his side of the bed before settling down and pulling you into his side, letting you virtually melt against him
“okay, okay i’m here, it’s okay amour..”
“it-it hurts”
“i know baby, i know it does…but it will only hurt for a little, i promise you.”
You wanted to believe him, you really did, but how many years would you have to suffer before it truly felt like you would never know how to feel okay.
“it’s hard to be here”
Now this caught Charles attention right away, having known your past with depression and even suicidal thoughts, he felt his blood run cold at the thought of you being anywhere than right here with him
“listen to me baby, i know it hurts, i know it’s hard, but i promise you i will help you find your sunshine, i will help you find your happiness”
He paused shifting to rest a hand on your cheek, his thumb swiping at a stray tear on your cheek
“i love you with everything in me, and i will do whatever i can to help you through this, if you need me to carry more of the weight, let me, if you need a shoulder to lean on more than usual, do it. you are my entire world baby, i won’t ever leave you out in the dark to take this on all on your own..”
Letting out a soft sniffle you looked up at him, always appreciating just how much love he held for you in his eyes alone
“why, i-i’m so sad a-all the time”
“because i love you. it doesn’t matter if your angry, happy, sad it’s part of you, i love all of you no matter what, and i am not going anywhere”
Charles leaned forward, pressing his lips to your forehead letting you have a minute to just digest everything he was saying
“pinky promise?” you asked softly, holding your pinky finger out which brought a soft smile to his face
“pinky promise baby, always.”
Nothing else needed to be said as you curled yourself further into his side, his arms only tightening on you, as if to keep you from slipping away from him. Charles knew words only helped so much, but he was willing to do whatever it took to bring you blue skies back. Even if it took days or weeks, even months, Charles was going to be right beside you, every step of the way.
Life might be painful, but you never had to go through it alone again.
415 notes · View notes
starsstuddedsky · 2 months
Text
Tumblr media
Blonde Phase
Renjun x gn reader
summary: spontaneous hair decisions always end in regret. that's what you expect to hear when you tell renjun you're bleaching your hair, but instead you find support, and even his help. you should appreciate his wholehearted support but instead it has you wondering: why doesn't he care?
genre: fluff, minimal angst, technically they're in grad school but that's not particularly relevant, non idol au,
warnings: swearing, mentions of drinking, spontaneous hair decisions (i do not endorse), lmk if I missed any
wc: 4.4k
a/n: in the immortal words of charles boyle, the most intimate thing you can do with a lover is wash their hair. yknow i made fun of him for that until i wrote this. i see it. also its been so long since ive finishing anything, pls forgive me if this is bad. renjun i love u. as always I'd love to hear what you think <3
Tumblr media
“I’m bleaching my hair.” If you say it fast enough, Renjun won’t be able to talk you out of it. The plastic bag swings around your wrist as you walk across the parking lot. “I’ve already bought the bleach and gloves and stuff, and I’m going to do it, today.”
He’s quiet for so long you check to make sure the call hasn’t dropped. “Okay.”
You almost drop your phone. “Okay?”
“Yeah,” he says, drawing the word out. “Was I supposed to say something else?”
“Um, yeah?” You say. “You have opinions about literally everything. You talked me out of buying those pants two days ago.” You finally get to your car, tossing the bag onto the passenger seat and half-falling behind the wheel.
“That’s because they were made of polyester, and the thrift store was still charging $15,” he says immediately. “That was a scam.”
“Money is temporary, drip is forever.”
“Those pants would have lasted a year max, before they fell apart, and you still haven’t learned how to sew so you wouldn’t even be able to mend them or upcycle them.”
“You know what, I didn’t buy the pants, so this fight is moot,” you say. You set the phone on speaker, turning the engine on to blast the AC.
“Well, not moot. Technically I won,” Renjun says.
“I’d respect you more if you weren’t insufferable.”
“Here I was thinking you appreciated my insight,” he says. “You even asked for it.”
“I did not!”
“You literally asked about bleaching your hair.”
“I said I was surprised you didn’t have an opinion, not that I wanted to hear it,” you say.
“Semantics,” Renjun says. “So what time do you want to come over?”
You frown. “Tonight?”
“The roommates are out of town for the whole weekend, and I have way better ventilation,” he says. “I’d much rather bleach it without passing out.” He pauses. “You do want help, right?”
“Honestly, I was not expecting support. I was fully ready to fight you on this,” you say.
He snorts. “Come over whenever, I'm not doing anything today.”
“See you in twenty minutes.” You hang up, feeling a strange ball of tension roll around in your gut. That was… too easy? Renjun always has something to say about your admittedly impulsive tendencies. But if he’s going to help you’re not going to reject it—knowing Renjun he’s probably already watching Youtube videos and learning more than you will ever know about bleaching hair.
And it’s Renjun. When have you done anything without his help?
.
.
Renjun opens the door wearing a wearied expression. He doesn’t bother to greet you or even smile, just unlocks the door and steps to the side.
“Hi to you, too,” you say, trading your shoes for the spare slippers resting by the doormat. You follow Renjun into the space that serves as kitchen, dining room, living room, and Jaemin’s miniature gym, with weights and mats stacked next to the television.
“Who the hell clogs a toilet and then leaves for the weekend,” Renjun says.
You set down your plastic bag full of hair products and frown. “That’s disgusting.”
Renjun leans against the counter. “And you didn’t have to spend the last forty minutes trying to unclog it.”
“So which of the guys are you going to murder?” You try to guess, running through his roommates: you find it hard to believe Jaemin would do such a thing. Jeno maybe, and Donghyuck would certainly think it’s funny. But, in all honesty, it could have been any of them.
“Don’t know,” Renjun says, “but knowing them, they’ll make a pact to protect each other.”
“Seriously?”
Renjun pauses, gaze sheepish. “It’s what I did when I accidentally killed Jaemin’s little succulent that survived his college dorm.”
You fake a gasp, placing a hand over your chest. “Every day I learn something new about you. That’s devious.”
“I was drunk!” Renjun says, holding up a finger. “And Jeno and Donghyuck pushed me into it, so it was equally their fault.”
“If you say so.” You glance around the apartment. “Where are they all?”
“Jaemin’s visiting family, Jeno has a soccer tournament, and Donghyuck said he’s going camping with Yangyang.” Renjun says, counting off with his fingers.
“Donghyuck and Yangyang are friends?”
“Yeah, according to them they bonded over dealing with me.”
“Those were their exact words?”
“Dealing with my ‘stupid ass,’” Renjun says.
“That’s more on brand.”
Renjun nods.
You think about Yangyang, Renjun’s friend from when he was a kid. You’ve met him a few times now, especially since he’s moved half an hour away from Renjun. He’s fun, always bringing out a chaotic side of Renjun whether it’s dancing on a bar or bringing out angry-Renjun. But Yangyang and Donghyuck?
“That’s a terrible friendship. They’re going to ruin you.”
Renjun nods again, but you see the smile hiding in his eyes. He can rant all he wants, you know he’s excited his friends are getting closer with each other.
You point at the bag. “So where are we doing this?”
You half expect him to lecture you about rash hair decisions but he just gestures to the kitchen. “I figure right here should be fine. The tiles should be pretty easy to clean and probably could use some bleach anyway.”
He drags the chair with a rickety leg from the dining table. You dig through the bag and set everything on the counter. While Renjun cracks a window open, you begin to mix the developer and the bleach, curling your lip at the sharp scent. Renjun joins you, pulling on a pair of gloves.
“Wow that’s strong,” he says, wincing.
“Yeah,” you say. “Definitely a good idea to do it here.”
When the powder is finally combined, you sit on the chair, Renjun following behind you. You section off your hair together, then he grabs the bowl and the brush.
He holds the thick paintbrush brush up against your hair, glancing at you, giving you one last chance to back down. You give him the nod of approval and he shifts back to focusing on your hair, brushing the bleach into it as carefully as he spreads paint on a canvas. He works section by section, carefully drenching your hair with the creamy solution.
“So, are you going to tell me why you decided to do this?”
You can’t resist turning and glancing at him. “I thought you approved.”
“I didn’t try to talk you out of it,” he says, “that doesn’t mean I’m not curious about how you came to this decision.”
You nod until Renjun uses his gloved hand to hold your head straight. “I suppose that’s fair.”
You pause, trying to find the right words. But you find yourself drifting back to Renjun. Why didn’t he ask this before the bleach was in your hair? It’s not like him to keep his opinions to himself. When you first met him, he was yelling at Donghyuck for going to a philosophy seminar just to fight with the notorious bigot of a professor (which Donghyuck did and then got kicked out, and proceeded to get the professor suspended). You only knew Mark back then, a friend from another class who invited you to meet some of his other friends in the dining hall. When Renjun turned to ask what you thought, you said Donghyuck should do what he thinks is right. Renjun didn’t hesitate to call you an idiot then. So why isn’t he calling you an idiot now?
To his credit Renjun doesn’t rush you. He continues to paint the bleach into your hair, content to wait for you to figure out an answer. Except you’re thinking about all the wrong questions. Like, seriously, why do you want him to call you an idiot?
“I want a change,” you finally say. “I’m stuck in a degree that will make me absolutely no money when I graduate, I can’t afford to break my lease, and don’t have any major relationships that need upheaving, so, hair.”
“‘A change?’” Renjun repeats. “Like, you woke up this morning and thought, today I’m going blonde?”
“Like, I have this feeling in my chest, this aching feeling that there’s something I need to do, someone I’m supposed to be, something more than the person I see in the mirror but I’ve made my decisions and I’m happy with my decisions and I genuinely like who I am. So, hair.”
You see Renjun’s hand falter out of the corner of your eye, halfway between the bleach mixture and your hair. He freezes for a heartbeat then continues to move, lifting some hair off your ear, careful not to brush the bleach onto your skin.
“‘So, hair,’” he says.
“Are you really going to repeat everything I say?”
This gets a short laugh from him. “I think the fumes are getting to me already.” He pauses, setting down the brush and stepping in front of you. “For what it’s worth, I like who you are, too. I’m really glad we’re friends.”
You smile at him. “Me too,” you say. “I definitely would have fucked up trying to bleach this on my own.”
.
.
“There’s still some bleach left,” Renjun says after he finishes with your roots. “You’re sure you don’t want your eyebrows to match?”
“Why don’t we do your eyebrows,” you say. “Better yet, why don’t we shave them off?”
Renjun sets down the brush. “Okay, no eyebrows.”
You grin at him. “That’s what I thought.”
He helps you get a plastic bag wrapped securely over your head, then sets the timer.
“What do you want to do for the next half hour?” You ask. “Preferably something that requires little to no movement.” You gesture to your head. “We’re not winning any frisbee tournaments tonight.”
“It was one time,” Renjun mutters, shaking his head and stepping around you plop down onto the couch. “We can watch something.”
You follow him, sitting on the other side, a cushion between you. The space feels strangely empty. Though you’ve spent plenty of time alone with Renjun, even alone with him at his apartment, the silence is usually interrupted by one of the guys getting bored of playing League, or coming back because they can’t go out to a bar without someone forgetting their ID, or in desperate need of Renjun’s expert advice (read: Jeno never remembers to ask Renjun to look over his submissions until 12 minutes before they’re due). The cushion between you never stays empty for long but the moments stretch on, only making the distance feel greater.
You wonder, not for the first time, how long it’s been since you’ve thought of Renjun as just a friend. If he was just a friend, you wouldn’t care so much about what he thinks. And if he was just a friend, you wouldn’t care so much that he suddenly doesn’t think.
You sneak a glance at him, fiddling with the remote for a couple seconds before realizing he grabbed the wrong one. He’s certainly always been handsome—that was undeniable from the moment you met him. But more than just being good looking, it’s Renjun himself. Not just those dark eyes, but the way they burn with passion (even when he’s arguing about the proper number of appetizers to order). It’s his perfectly shaped lips, the way they betray how he feels with a slight curve up or down—and his smile. Always, always his smile, beautiful and breathtaking even though you’ve seen it a thousand times.
He turns, a little furrow in his brow. “What?”
“Hm?”
“You’re looking at me funny,” he says. “Did I get bleach in my hair or something?”
You turn to face the TV, trying to pay attention to the show Renjun chose. “I wasn’t looking at you funny,” you say. “I wasn’t even looking at you.”
“If you say so,” Renjun says, “but if there’s a blonde spot anywhere in my hair, I’m so making you pay for it.”
You shake your head. Where the hell did those thoughts come from? Renjun, more than a friend? Sure, you’re close with him and sure, he’s objectively attractive, but you’ve never had those thoughts before. Well, at least not sober.
“Um, why are we watching Singles Inferno?”
“Because I asked and you were too busy not staring at me to answer, so I put it on,” Renjun says. “And don’t you dare try to tell me you don’t like it. I saw you rant on your Instagram story the other day.”
“Okay, but you don’t get it,” you say. “This bitch really has the audacity to to—”
“I saw your post,” Renjun says. “Believe me, I get it.”
“If you didn’t want to hear about it you should not have turned it on, because now I can’t stop,” you say. Renjun rolls his eyes but even as you delve into a full on essay about the horrible men particularly common in dating shows, you see the corners of his lips tilt up into a smile.
.
.
The timer goes off halfway through an episode.
“Saved by the buzzer,” Renjun says. “I’m putting a ban on anything reality TV related for the next three hours.”
“You’re the one that brought it up,” you mutter without any real annoyance. Despite his banter, Renjun dutifully listened to your rants, and even got mad along with you.
You drag a chair to the sink while Renjun drapes a towel over your shoulders. He puts on gloves and unwraps the bag, letting your hair fall into the empty sink.
“Close your eyes,” Renjun says gently. He tilts your head back, cupping the back of your head for a moment before pulling the head of the sink faucet out. He runs the water, long enough for you to peek your eyes open.
You’ve gotten used to seeing Renjun focused. He gets a little furrow in his brow, always glaring at his work. Before you were friends, you used to think he was actually angry, that his frowns and short tone were real. You’ve learned since then, it’s not his emotions, it’s his passion. The frown only comes out when he’s focused, trying to be perfect. When he cares.
“Unless you want bleach in them, close your eyes,” Renjun mutters, with absolutely no malice behind the words. His eyes shift to meet yours and that’s how you know you’re right. He can glare and bluster all he wants, he can’t hide his eyes, warm and shining. Like when he’s looking at his art, his gaze is a combination of soft and intense, creating something stronger than affection. Except he’s not looking at his art, he’s looking at you.
You squeeze your eyes shut, feeling your heartbeat pick up. Despite every attempt to shut down the thoughts, they race through your head, a stampede grown out of control. Renjun, who you’ve only known a year and a half but who has become one of your closest friends. Renjun, who never fails to share the only opinion you really care about. Renjun, who you can’t imagine life without. Renjun, who you’ve never dared to imagine life with.
He places a hand on your forehead, bringing the faucet closer to rinse your roots while keeping the water from pouring onto your face. You prepare for a cold shock but the water that soaks into your hair is the perfect temperature—not scalding hot, not freezing cold. Some water sprays over his hand, falling onto your eyelids and cheeks.
“Sorry,” Renjun murmurs. He holds the head farther away, running his fingers gently through the roots of your hair. He’s so close you can feel his breath, warm against your temple. You can feel his body, hovering over yours, and maybe it’s just your imagination, but warmth seems to emanate from it.
His friends would laugh at you if you described Renjun as soft to their face, but it’s the only adjective that captures the way he works the water through your hair. Soft and gentle and careful and nothing like the Renjun that has to corral everyone into his car at 3 in the morning. And yet this Renjun doesn’t feel like a stranger to you.
Washing your hair takes a lifetime, but as soon as he steps away and turns off the water, you miss it. You miss him, even though he’s only a couple feet away.
“You can open your eyes now,” he says. As soon as you do, he tosses a towel at you. It hits you in the face before you can get your hands up.
“Hey!”
“Sorry,” Renjun says, not sounding sorry at all. He manages to hold back the laugh but still grins at you, unashamed. He steps forward and pats your face dry, with the same gentleness as before, though there’s still a mischievous glint in his eyes. You yank the towel away before he gets any ideas, drying off your face on your down and wrapping it around your hair. You wring it out a couple times before letting go, doing your best to get it to fall evenly around your head.
You raise your eyebrows at Renjun. “Okay, how bad is it?”
“Okay, first of all, I’m insulted that you think there’s any way I’d fuck up you hair,” Renjun says. “And it looks really good. Blonde suits you.”
You take a deep breath and pull out your phone, studying yourself in the mirror and… he’s right. The color is even, somewhere between blonde and orange that is unavoidable when using bleach. Radical hair changes generally end in tears but looking at yourself in the mirror, you don’t feel the usual dissonance. The hair is different but somehow more familiar than the “normal” you that doesn’t feel right anymore.
“I’m right,” Renjun says.
You smile. “Yeah, you are.” You put down your phone, meeting his eyes. “Thank you, Renjun.”
“For what?”
“Doing all of this for me,” you say.
“It’s the least I could do,” he mumbles. “You’re my friend.”
You shake your head. “Thank you anyways.”
Renjun just shrugs and grabs the bowl, rinsing out the bleach in the sink. If you didn’t know any better, you’d think he’s avoiding your eyes.
You do your best to clean up the bleach from the floor, busying yourself until Renjun finishes. You wonder if you’re imagining the tiles getting a little bit whiter. Finally, he turns off the water and glances at you.
“You’re really happy with it?” He asks, sounding more like he doubts you rather than changing his opinion.
“Yeah,” you say, standing up. “I think it’s the ‘me’ of right now, you know?”
“Not really.”
“Like, I feel disjointed, and blonde hair is definitely not me, but it's the me that feels kind of all over the place, so even though it doesn’t look like me, it looks like me.” You wring your hands together, fingers tinged red.
“That makes no sense,” Renjun says, “but I think I get what you mean.” He smiles. “And I’m glad. I wouldn’t want you to have any regrets.”
So he did think this was a potential mistake? Why didn’t he say anything?
Renjun turns back to the sink, but before he can turn the water on, your voice calls his name. “Renjun?”
“Hm?” He doesn’t turn around.
“Why didn’t you fight me on this?”
He doesn’t move for a long moment. You wish you could see his face. “I have been told by certain people,” he begins, which is code for Donghyuck and Yangyang certified their position as Renjun’s worst nightmare. He turns to face you, wiping his hands on a towel.
“That I have a tendency to be overly opinionated in a generally negative direction. And I thought about it, and I realized I'm never really fully supportive, whether it’s a big decision, or, like, coffee, and I’ve always been this way, but, apparently, it’s especially… apparent with you.” He frowns. “This is all coming out wrong. I’m trying to say that it’s different when I’m around you. I’m different.”
Your eyes jump between his, trying to decipher what he’s saying. “Different?”
“I care a lot about you,” Renjun says, “more than anyone, actually.”
“Oh.” You blink once, twice. “Wait, you like me?”
Renjun’s eyes shift to the floor. “Yeah.”
You can’t help but let out a short laugh, reeling at the absurdity of it all. Renjun likes you? But he’s Renjun. Even though he’s the most common main character in your daydreams, you never once realistically thought he might be fantasizing about you too. But he likes you.
“I really didn’t want to say anything, I mean, before anything else you’re my friend, and I don’t want to ruin that,” Renjun says rapidly. “We’re good friends, and I really didn’t want to be the guy that pretends to be your friend but just wants to date you the whole time, that’s really not what I was trying to do, it’s just—”
“Renjun.” You put a hand on his shoulder and he freezes mid sentence, mouth still hanging open a little. Before he can move, you lean closer, the type of line you’d only dare to cross in your dreams.
“I’d like to kiss you,” you say softly. He blinks, eyes darting between your eyes and your lips.
“I’d like that,” he finally breathes. So you kiss him.
It starts light, his lips exactly as you imagined—soft and warm. His arm works its way around your waist, pulling you closer. The other works its way into your hair, still wet and sticking to your head. Renjun kisses like he’s been planning this for a long time, and maybe he has. Every movement is slow and careful, until he’s stolen all your air and even then you don’t want to pull away.
Your bravery fades the minute you meet his eyes. You bury your face into his chest, your cheek resting against your own hand. Renjun wraps both of his arms around you, holding you snugly in place.
“I like you, too,” you say into his chest. It’s the cowards route but if you look him in the eyes the words will never come out. “If it wasn’t obvious.”
“It wasn’t actually,” he says softly. “I think I drove all of my friends insane trying to figure out whether I should confess or not.”
“They all know?” You groan. “We’re never going to hear the end of this.”
“Yeah.” When Renjun laughs, it shakes your whole body. You can feel the rumbling, overtaking his heartbeat. “It’s okay though. It’s worth it.”
You turn your head, emerging from the sanctuary of his chest and tucking your head so that you can see his face. He smiles at you with the familiar warmth you’ve come to expect.
“Yeah,” you say, “it really is.”
Renjun grins.
“Your hair on the other hand…” He says.
“I thought you liked it!”
“I like it,” Renjun says, “but when has Donghyuck ever liked a single change to anyone’s hair?”
“Since when do you care what Donghyuck thinks?”
“I’m just saying now that we’re officially dating, my friends are going to be extra annoying,” Renjun says.
“Extra annoying? I didn’t think that was possible.”
“Don’t underestimate them.”
You groan, pressing your face back into his chest. “It’s not too late to get some hair dye.”
“You are not changing your hair because of my dumbass friends,” Renjun says.
“You like it?”
“You like it,” he says. “That’s the only opinion that really matters.” He pauses then adds, “But yeah. I like it.”
You grin, lifting your head to kiss his cheek. “Maybe we should dye your hair too.”
Renjun snorts. “Oh yeah?”
“We could have matching couples hair.”
He laughs out loud this time. “Maybe we should just get some shirts.”
“Three minutes of dating and you already want matching shirts? Huang Renjun, be honest.” You push off of him until you can place your hands on his shoulders and look him in the eyes. “Are you obsessed with me?”
“Yes,” he says, layering his voice in sarcasm that still isn’t enough to hide the truth of the admission. “All day every day, all I think about is you.”
“Well, see, that can’t be true because if you were that obsessed and I’m this close, you would already be kissing me because—” You forget whatever you were going to say, but it doesn’t really matter. Not when Renjun is kissing you like this. Your hands at his shoulders slink around his neck, while his wrap around your waist, leaning so close to you, you feel your back begin to dip.
Huang Renjun is poison, the kind that turns into a heart-shaped puff of pink when the bottle is opened. You melt into his kiss and it’s still not enough. You could die, right this instant, and you don’t think you’d notice. Death itself wouldn’t be able to tear you away from this moment.
“Renjun!” Donghyuck’s voice thunders through the kitchen. “How dare you? You bastard, you’re cheating?”
You jump apart, turning to see him looming in the doorway. His glare settles on you, and you see the exact moment he realizes he recognizes you.
“Jesus Christ, you could have knocked or something,” Renjun says.
“I live here too,” Donghyuck says automatically. He squints, then looks at Renjun, then back at you. “YN? Your hair is blonde.”
For some reason, you raise your hand and wave at him. “Hey!”
“Oh my god!” Donghyuck cries. “Yangyang owes me thirty dollars!” He races back out the door, screaming something that’s lost as the door swings shut.
You glance at Renjun. “Cheating?”
He frowns at the door, still a crack open. “Did he… seriously think you were someone else? That I was cheating on my unrequited crush?”
His eyes shift to yours. A heartbeat passes and you burst into laughter. His friends might be annoying, but they’re still endearing. You press a messy, smile-infested kiss to his lips and wonder if you’ll ever get used to the giddy feeling.
There’s plenty messy in your life, plenty to doubt. But watching Yangyang and Donghyuck drag their backpacks in (apparently Donghyuck forgot his power bank and they decided to give up on camping) as they attempt to interrogate Renjun on every detail, you can’t help but feel like it doesn’t really matter. You don’t doubt Renjun. You don’t doubt blonde suits you. And you don’t doubt the power of a last minute hair decision, not anymore.
Tumblr media
thank you for reading!! likes, reblogs, and comments are always appreciated
129 notes · View notes
wileys-russo · 5 months
Note
Mearps and "you really need to take a nap babe" xx
mary earps
"-two more days and then i'm all yours." you smiled at her words with a nod, though mary could see it didn't quite reach your eyes. "i'm really sorry love, you know this time of year is insane." mary sighed and you were quick to assure her you understood.
"i know baby. you can't help your schedule and i am so incredibly proud of all of your accomplishments and awards, i'm just sorry i can't be there to support and watch you accept them." you frowned, your own job keeping you tethered to manchester while mary had been seemingly all around everywhere but manchester for the last two weeks.
between trainings, national camp, nations league, away games, conti cup matches, awards, trophies, public appearances, her clothing company and the impending transfer season you and mary hadn't actually spent more than a few hours together in just over two and a half weeks.
and you were both feeling it.
you were a teacher which meant you tried your very best to be there to watch her play, accept awards or just be with her. but with the end of the year fast approaching your own workload was increasing with reports due, exams to mark and deadlines to meet.
"hey you do not need to be sorry beautiful. your kids need you and i am so proud of you every single day, hows the reports coming?" mary questioned adjusting where she laid down on her bed, away for the weekend in liverpool for a united match.
"they're...coming." you sighed tiredly, glancing to your laptop and the papers scattered all around it. "you look tired baby. you're not pulling all nighters again are you?" your girlfriend asked somewhat sternly, knowing you all too well having been with you almost two years now.
"i have to babe, its my month to do after school pickup duty so i'm not getting home until after five thirty." you sighed running a hand through your hair, mary now really noticing the bags under your eyes which were near matching to her own.
"baby i really don't like when-" she was cut off as you heard her name called in the distance and suddenly you were looking at someone else. "hi tooney." you chuckled at the younger girl who sung out hello, ignoring your girlfriends protests as she struggled beneath millie, maya and lucia who'd all come thundering in.
"i'm busy! get off and get out." mary managed to shove them off, all four girls calling out bye as they dissapeared off screen and you heard the door slam behind them.
"children!" mary groaned as she belly flopped onto the bed and readjusted her phone. "baby love you look exhausted, you know how i feel about you pulling all nighters." mary warned as you wave her off, ignoring the fact your eyes felt like they had anchors attached to them.
"mary." the striker hummed with an amused smile as you were clearly fighting to keep your eyes open, your girlfriend having just talked you through her day.
"do you think if you injected coffee you'd die?" you asked tiredly, one eye closed as the keeper bit her lip to stop from laughing. "whys that baby?" she questioned curiously. "well when you inject drugs it goes right to your bloodstream. or if you're sick they hook you up to an iv yeah?" you started to mumble, mary humming encouragingly.
"well what if for people who are like coffee addicts, could they get put on like a drip of coffee? like a caffeinated iv." you pitched your idea to her, moving to rest your head on your hands as your girlfriend laughed as quietly as she could.
"you really need a nap babe."
309 notes · View notes
4pfsukuna · 5 months
Text
jealous!sukuna story here👇🏾
kings-get-jealous-to
Akward
The last thing Nanami kento expected to see at Gojo’s party (that he basically tricked him into going to) was his ex girl from 4 years ago in a black mini silk dress that if you just bent over a tad bit more—
“You alright man?” Gojo ask slapping his blonde hair friends back snapping him back to the reality where his cup of alcohol had been crushed completely in his hand.
He was sure of Two things in this moment.
His hand was wet and 2? He wasnt letting you get away again.
———
Incubus curse
After the mission Gojo sent you and Namami on to get rid of some incubus curse (which he didnt mention)  Nanami is shocked when you dont show up to the school the next day and decides to pay you a visit.
“I want you to bend me over every surface including my balcony until neither of us have any energy left… and then go for one more round”
Part two
What if Nanami is the one who suffers the effects of the incubus curse instead of you?
He felt fine and whatever silly little pink dust the cursed spirit sprayed mustve been just that, that’s until he catches a glimpse of you pinning one of the students to the ground and damn would he work endless amounts of overtime to be under you like that— what was he saying?! Shaking his head he almost completely looses it when he watches the way your ass jiggles in your shorts and wonders how back shots would be.
Its not long before hes back in his office gripping his length in his fist and bottom lip between his teeth to quiet his moans.
“Nanami you shouldve said something”
“Like what? How i want to have you moaning and beging to cum for a fifth time with tears in your eyes? Or that i want to watch your eyes get  wide as you swallow my dick taking it to the back of your throat like the good girl i know you are? Or that i want to fill you up with every drop of my seed to put my claim on you and my self control is dwindling because i can smell your arousal and i just want to burry my face in it” he says with pure raw desire as his eyes burn into mine.
——
Professor reward & punishment.
You suck at college math and luckily your neighbor who happens to be a proffessor offers to tutor you after you helped him out a few nights ago.
“Since you can’t seem to pay attention, for every answer you get right ill put in another finger and for every wrong answer you put clothes on reducing the friction.” He holds my jaw making sure im listening.
“And extra credit” i tease before he begins rolling his sleeves up the bulge of his muscles ans loosening his tie yanking aggresively.
A dark smirk reaches his lips that ive never seen before and ive never wanted to be more accurate in… whatever subject we were studying for again.
————
Jealous!Sukuna
You and sukuna had gone back and forth so much its almost like you forgot yuji was his vessel, almost like you forgot he was the king of curses.
But none of that mattered now you (23) and yuji also of age had comitted to getting drunk and letting loose for once.
Sukuna pays it no mind as you aimlessly flirt with some guy at the bar but your eyes are on him. Not the guy, not yuji but Sukuna who had taken over since yuji was to drunk to fight back.
He could easily burn the world to the ground and nothing could stop him except for the look in your eyes when your tounge trails up his abs to his chest tracing his tattoo that the only fire burning hes worried about is the one in your eyes.
“Id pleasure you in ways no woman in your 1000 years of existance could even think about” i smirk before flipping us over so im on top us still connected by our hips moving my hand from his wrist to his neck making him purr.
——
Dad!Sukuna
More of a drabble aka the 3 times his kids call him daddy and the one time you do.
“Get in the cage!” 
“Sukuna stop telling them that! Theres no cage”
“He put fucking smiley faces in my book of incantations” he growls showing me the smiley faces with red eyes, fangs and a crooked smile.
“Oooh he drew you is that why youre mad” i tease watching him seathe as the sound of footsteps running upstairs can be heard smoke nearly comes out of his ears and foam from his mouth.
“As shitty as the smiley face may be he drew it because of you, now stop being such a sourpuss! if you be nice ill even call you daddy and let you give me another little you” i peck his lips listening to the growl of disappointment from pulling away too fast.
“I don’t think i told them how much i love them today” He mumbles pulling me into his lap.
57 notes · View notes
filthyjoetini · 8 months
Note
whats UP ive got a request, are you ready? so, it's game night and you play the newly wed game and you and joe SUCK balls at it, it's like you don't even KNOW each other (food for lots of bickering on the way home) but then, at home, joe's like, "let me show you how well i know you" 😏😏😏 turns out, your friends were just asking you the wrong questions heheheheh
Quit Playing Games (With My Heart)
a/n: Thank you so much for your request, babe! I had a field trip with this one....and it took me ages because things happened (saw the lad irl, didn't help...like AT ALL, then work and life and everything happened at once). The usual big thank you goes out to my bby @barfightzanddiscolightz. You da best! (music! DJ Khaled!)
warnings: embarrassment, smut (minors DNI), a pinch of drama (wouldn't be one of my stories if there weren't any drama)
wordcount: 3.7k
Tumblr media
Restless in your seat, your irritation intensified by the minute. It was your monthly game night with the two other couples Joe and you had known for years. The newlyweds Amy and Rory, who had nailed the game at their wedding, were the masterminds behind tonight’s entertainment: The Newlywed Game. They were killing it; it was almost corny. Adam and Ethan, the second couple who had been inseparable since secondary school, were also acing it. Their smug grins made your stomach churn. But Joe and you? God. You were awful at it. The contrast between your faltering answers and the other couples‘ flawless performances couldn‘t have been more evident. Game night had never seemed so high-stakes before.
Joe and you were sat across from each other as you faced your relentless gamemaster Ethan. You were five out of 20 questions into the game, which meant each of you would be asked ten. However, the scoreboard was anything but in your favour, you had only managed to get two answers right whilst Joe had gotten none. Incredulously, you stared at him letting out a humourless chuckle, as he got yet another answer wrong. You still had 14 questions in total to go, and the odds seemed increasingly stacked against you.
“Incorrect…again.”, Ethan muttered with a frown on his face. His eyes, which held nothing but compassion and confusion, were set on you.
What the hell was going on? Joe and you had been together for four years and you knew each other inside and out… or so you thought.
“Babe…”, you groaned slightly, staring at him with wide eyes and downturned lips.
“What?”, Joe asked you, mirroring your stare, opening his eyes even wider than yours. His lips, however, were set in a broad grin.
You didn’t answer him verbally but just kept staring at him in disbelief.
“What?”, his smile faltered, and an irritated expression took its place. Before he continued, he took a swig of his beer. “How am I supposed to know what superpower you want to have? We’ve never spoken about this.”
“Yes, we have…”, you started to argue back when Ethan quickly asked the next question.
“This one’s for you.”, he said, pointing in your direction. “What thing/ability/possession of yours would Joe like to have for himself.”
Fuck. This was hard. Joe had everything he could ask for in a materialistic and financial sense, so maybe an ability. You thought long and hard, trying to ignore the whispers from Rory, Amy, and Adam who were sat directly behind Joe. You finally wrote down the answer on one of the notecards you had been provided with.
My ability to say “no”.
Joe couldn’t say no if his life depended on it, which made it very easy for you to get your way. This is how you had ended up with a booking.com account full of planned city trips.
Slowly, you slid your notecard over to Ethan, who picked it up to read the question out loud again.
“The question was “What thing/ability/possession of yours would Joe like to have for himself.” and you said: “My ability to say “no.” … Joe’s answer is: “Your magnificent boyfriend.” … I’m so sorry, zero points again.”
You clenched your jaw tightly, trying hard not to let your irritation show even further. Your magnificent boyfriend? What kind of stupid answer is that? Yeah, Joe is a very decent and loving boyfriend but what makes him think he’s that magnificent? Everyone has flaws! You would have to have a word with him when you got home. This was getting really fucking embarrassing.
Rory, Amy, and Adam were now sniggering behind Joe, as he giggled at the wrong answer, totally oblivious to your growing annoyance.
“Next question.” Ethan announced with a chuckle of his own. Great, you had now totally become the joke of the night. You could bet your reputation as the game night’s laughingstock was secure for the next month until the next gathering.
“Joe.”
“Hi!”
“The question is: What’s her favourite yogurt topping?”
Joe grinned, quickly scribbled down his answer, and shoved it into Ethan’s hand before he picked up his pint of beer and took a huge gulp of it. Good. He had to know this. You ate yogurt every morning and one topping was always on it. Sometimes even he would make you your bowl of yogurt and he always topped it off with it. It was honey.
Ethan cleared his throat and repeated the question and then revealed the responses:
“Joe, you wrote down “Smarties” … and her answer is “Honey” … NIL POINTS! AGAIN!”
SMARTIES?! Who the hell puts Smarties on their yogurt? Does he think I’m a child? You were fuming inside and let out a frustrated huff through your nose, glaring daggers at Joe.
Grabbing your white wine spritzer, you tried to drown out your exasperation, but Amy, Rory, Adam, and Ethan were now fully laughing, and to your bewilderment Joe was too. You swallowed down the scream you wanted to let out along with your beverage and inhaled deeply. 12 more questions to go. You could do this. Also, you were both slightly tipsy and it was just a stupid game. No need to get all upset about it. You tried to persuade yourself but deep down, it bothered you to no end.
---
Joe and you had lost game night. In the end you had gotten six out of ten points and Joe had managed to get one answer right. He had been pretty proud of himself for it. Even took a victory lap and placed a sloppy kiss to your lips.
With your arms crossed tightly, you strode a few steps ahead of Joe, practically marching towards the tube station. It wasn‘t anger driving you forward, but rather embarrassment.
“Baby. Slow down!”, he shouted after you, but you didn’t oblige and just kept walking. Once you had made it to the entrance of the tube station, you opted for the stairs instead of the escalator and took two steps at the time.
“Babe. Please wait up!”
At the foot of the stairs, you came to a sudden stop. Joe almost bumped into you with full force but was able to catch himself by holding onto your shoulders.
You shrugged off his hands instantly and slowly turned to face him.
“What the fuck was that, Joe?”
“What was what?”, he questioned, confusion evident on his face.
“Your answers!”, you replied, letting out a frustrated sigh. “They were all wrong!”
“Untrue, I got one right— Ow!”
You slapped his shoulder, hard.
“Christ, babe. No need for violence.”, he pouted, rubbing his shoulder excessively. You were still standing at the foot of the stairs as people passed you to the left and right.
“We’ve talked about most of those things before. I can’t believe you got them all wrong. It’s like you don’t even know me!”, you explained, voicing your frustration. “It was really fucking embarrassing.”
“Oh baby.”, Joe cooed, wrapping his arms around you, gently pressing you against his broad chest. “It’s just a stupid game. I was obviously not taking it seriously and I’m rather squiffed, which, I know isn’t an excuse, but I know you don’t put smarties on your yogurt.”
With your face squished against his pecs, you let out a soft snort.
“That’s the answer you’re going to rectify? There were other answers that were way worse. Also, I don’t know if you noticed but I took the game seriously.”
“Yeah, I know. I’m sorry.”, he apologised, pressing a soft kiss to your temple. “Come on, let’s get going, our train’s due in a couple of minutes.”
With his arm around your shoulders, Joe led you away from the stairs towards the platform.
Just as you rounded the corner, your train was approaching with as much ruckus as it could cause. That’s just the Northern Line, always noisy.
“…still.”, you stated over the noise with a pout which made Joe hum out a short “hmm?“ and looked down at you.
He let out an exaggerated gasp when he saw your face, lowered his lips to your ear and spoke in a low growl: “When we’re home, I’m gonna show you how well I know you. I promise.”
---
As soon as you both had kicked off your shoes, and the door to your flat had fallen shut behind you, Joe pressed you against the wall, peppering your neck and mostly the spot beneath your ear with needy kisses. Each nip on your skin elicited a soft moan from you which he reciprocated with a groan of his own.
“Fuck!”, he groaned against your skin. “I need you. Right now!”
“Then take me.”, you teased him, breathing hard.
You didn’t need to tell him twice. Joe hoisted you up and you immediately wrapped your legs around his waist and your arms around his neck. As quickly as he could, he carried you over to your bedroom and kicked the door open, throwing you onto the bed. The springs in your mattress creaked almost comically which made you giggle softly.
Pushing yourself up on your shoulders, you looked up at Joe who was staring down at you hungrily. His eyes were glossed over with want, and you could see that he was undressing you mentally by the way they were roaming your body.
You gave him a nod, accompanied by a sly smirk which was enough to make him move towards you.
You quickly unbuttoned your trousers and pushed them down your legs whilst Joe removed his polo shirt which he ungracefully threw behind him on the floor. Joe noticed that your trousers were stuck at your ankles and moved to pry them off with skilful hands. He then glided his hands up along your legs to your hips and pinched you there which made you yelp in return. Moving his hands up further, he pushed your top up over your stomach and pressed nibbling kisses along it. Leaning back, he motioned for you to hold up your arms so he could remove the garment from your body completely.
You were now dressed only in your underwear whilst he was still wearing his ill-fitting blue jeans.
“Do you need help with them?”, you questioned him fervently nodding at his jeans. He responded by sucking his lower lip into his mouth and a curt nod. You grinned wickedly and shook your head before you got up on your knees and swiftly undid the button, yanking down the jeans over his hips and bum.
The evidence of how much he wanted you was clearly visible and restrained inside his boxer briefs which made you bite your lower lip in anticipation.
Bending forward a bit, you pushed the jeans further down his thighs and over his knees until you came face to face with his hard-on. You cackled again and Joe wiggled out of his denims, deliberately pushing his groin into your cheek.
He grinned down at you and the predicament you found yourself in.
“Nu-uh. Not so fast.”, you chuckled, leaning back on your haunches again. “I’ll get to that later…eventually.”
With a widened grin, all Joe did, was raise an eyebrow at you. You both knew that you would definitely rather than eventually get to that later.
Joe then beckoned you to lay down on your back which you immediately did. Kneeling on the edge of the bed, he began moving forward, slowly crawling towards you.
He was hovering above you, both hands on your hips with his fingers hooked in the waistband of your knickers.
“May I?”
“If you must.”
Rolling his eyes at your bratty answer and with a couple of yanks, he managed to get them off you.
“Those are always so hard to get off.”, he complained, dropping your knickers to the floor next to the bed. “Next time I’m just gonna rip them apart.”
“Don’t you dare, Joseph Quinn.”, you threatened with a glare.
“I won’t. Don’t worry.”, he chuckled, moving his head slowly towards yours to give you a soft peck on your lips. “Your bra on the other hand.”
“JOE!”
“I’m kidding. Please sit up.”
You pushed yourself up, wrapping your arms around Joe’s torso whilst he moved his hands to your back to unclasp your bra. Unwrapping your arms from around him, you shrugged off your bra which fell into your lap. Joe picked it up and haphazardly threw it onto the floor where it joined the rest of your clothes.
Joe wrapped one arm around you and lay you down on your back again. He eased his arm from around you and moved to sit on his haunches with his legs tucked beneath them, taking in your body in all your naked glory.
“You’re naked.”, he stated the obvious. It was now his turn to bite his lower lip.
“And you’re still in your pants.”, you responded with a smirk, getting ready to sit up again to help him remove his last item of clothing.
Tutting he pushed you back down again.
“I will get rid of them soon but first let me show you how well I know you. I promised, I would.”
Moving forward again, he placed his face in the crook of your neck and started pressing another round of kisses to it, this time the light nibbles turned into more forceful bites. He was kissing from behind your ear down to your shoulder where he sucked the skin into his mouth before trailing his lips to your clavicle where he bit down hard, surely leaving a bruise.
When he moved his lips to your right breast, he closed his mouth around your nipple and sucked hard, coaxing yet another moan from the depth of your throat. Letting go of your nipple with a pop, he kissed it once more before moving to the other one, giving it the exact same treatment.
In the meantime, one of Joe’s hands, which he had previously placed on your knee was currently wandering up your thigh between your legs where its fingers clearly felt how much you needed him whilst his other hand was holding yours in a firm grasp.
Joe removed his hand from between your legs and rubbed his fingers together. They were totally wet with your slick which made him grin against your left boob. Giving it one last open-mouthed kiss, he moved his mouth to your belly and dragged his tongue and teeth down the length of it, over your abdomen and your mound before eventually clamping it over your core.
He sucked and lapped at your lower lips and never neglecting your bundle of sensitive nerves as if he hadn’t eaten in days.
Your free hand came to rest on the crown of his head, grabbing a handful of his luscious curls in an iron grip.
“Joe…”, you whimpered, releasing the air from your lungs in shallow breaths. “Fingers. NOW!”
Joe nodded against your labia, his nose slowly dragging over it and swiftly inserted two whole fingers into your pussy which made you gasp out in pleasure. Slowly, he started to move his fingers with his mouth still hard at work.
With each pump of his fingers, you not so gently pulled at his hair, coaxing groans from his throat which made you clench your thighs around his head, holding him in position.
In no time, he had you on the brink of an orgasm and when the knot, that had formed inside your belly came loose, you let out a screaming moan.
He was guiding you through your orgasm and lapped up your juices when you finally came down from it. Trembling, you let go of his hair and pushed him from between your legs by his forehead, panting hard and covering your face with your now free hand. Looking at Joe from between your fingers, he chuckled at your actions and sat up again, licking his fingers clean, which turned your already flushed face a shade darker.
You closed your eyes, trying to get your breathing back to normal when you heard Joe letting out a small groan. Peeking through your fingers again, you saw him adjust himself inside his briefs with his very wet free hand.
Letting go of his other hand, which you almost squished to death during your orgasm, you eventually found the strength to push yourself up on your knees again. Now it was your turn to get him out of his fabric prison. Slowly you put your hands on the hem of his pants and pushed them down, letting his rock-hard cock spring free. You pushed them down even further to his thighs, which you tapped with your fingers to make him stand on his knees. When you couldn’t get them down his calves he grunted and yanked them off his legs himself.
As soon as his underwear was on the floor, you placed an eager kiss to his soft yet defined belly, before moving your lips to the tip of his penis, placing an equally eager one there before very gently grazing your teeth across it. He let out a shuddering breath that sounded like a “fuck”, which encouraged you to place your hand on his shaft and slowly pumping up and down whilst you took more of him into your mouth, bobbing your head in the same motion as your hand.
One of his hands moved to the back of your head, grabbing a fistful of your hair to hold onto you. Your ministrations to his dick elicited the most delicious moans from him. You loved making him moan like that. It’s like a reward and to return this reward you started to use your tongue which in turn made him moan even harder.
After a couple of minutes, he suddenly tugged on your hair a little too harsh which educed a small whimper from you. You let go of his dick with a filthy slurp and smiled up at him.
“I gotta…”, he panted, slowly pushing you on your arse.”…be inside you.”
Giggling, you let yourself fall back again, spreading your legs for him. He quickly positioned himself between them and pushed inside you with one swift move. You let out the longest and most obscene moan he had ever had the pleasure of getting out of you.
“That’s right.”, he smirked, leaning forward to capture your lips in a ravenous kiss.
“…don’t move yet.”, you whispered against his lips, slightly wiggling your bum and trying to adjust to him being inside of you. After a couple of heartbeats, you nodded at him, and he started to move in a hard but steady rhythm. Quickly, you wrapped your arms around him, pulling him atop of you, dragging your fingernails across his back, leaving behind trails of reddened skin.
In response, one of Joe’s hands was placed on your hip, holding it in a vicelike grip which would leave fingerprint-like bruises behind, trying to steady you. With the other one, he was quick to use his skilful fingers yet again and had you on the verge of your second orgasm in no time. As his thumb was rubbing at your clit, your thighs started to spasm and your moans got even louder.
“Joe! Baby! I’m about to…”, you yelled, coming before you got the chance to finish your sentence. Your orgasm quickly triggered his and he was not far behind. With short grunts, you felt him come inside before, completely out of breath, he collapsed on top you, fully closing the small distance that was left before.
“Fuck.”, you panted, tightening your arms around him and placing soft kisses to his forehead.
“Yeah…fuck.”, he chuckled, kissing the skin of your sternum where he had decided to rest his head.
---
Wrapped in your duvet and basking in the afterglow, Joe was placing delicate kisses along your arm and the back of your hand.
“Honey.”
“Huh?”, you questioned him. You were confused. He never called you honey. Darling sometimes. Usually, babe or baby. But never honey.
“Your favourite yogurt topping. It’s honey, specifically the dark blossom honey.”, he explained, placing a soft kiss to the heel of your hand, moving up to place another kiss to your thumb’s fingertip. “…and your ability to say “no” is what I’d like to have for myself. Because it would do me good to say no at least once…”, a kiss to the fingertip of your index finger, “…you are an early riser whilst I wouldn’t even hear the EAS alarm…”, a kiss to your middle finger’s tip, “…your childhood pet was a bunny named Scamper…”, a soft peck to your ring finger, “…your favourite film is Forrest Gump and it always makes you cry like a baby…”, and finally, a lingering kiss to your pinky,”…and your hidden talent is that you somehow manage to find a correlation between every fucking thing. It’s insane and I love it.”
He was correctly answering some of the questions from earlier, even with additional information. Of course, he knows you. Having doubted him made you feel really shitty now.
“…baby.”, you cooed at him, sitting up and taking his hand in yours. You kissed the back of his hand and eventually leaned in to place your mouth against his, kissing him hard. He instantly deepened it, moving his hand to your neck and pulled you in closer.
Out of breath, you pulled back a little, rubbing your nose against his. “I love you. I’m sorry I doubted you.”
“And I love you.”, he replied, capturing your lips in another kiss. “Ahhh, it’s nothing…see, I told you I know you…I just needed a little physical reminder, is all.”
“Fuck off, Joe.”, you giggled, letting go of his hand and pushing him away from you immediately, smacking his arm playfully. “I’ll give you a different physical reminder if you don’t stop that.”
“Ha! I’d like to see you try.”, he challenged, and you chortled, smacking the spot once more.
“Ow! Okay. I’ll stop.”, he surrendered, holding up his hands in defence with a huge smirk on his lips.
“Good.”
“Good. I love you.”, he ensured you once more.
“And I love you.”
THE END
Taglist:
@ohmeg @daleyeahson @lma1986 @palomahasenteredthechat @mandyjo8719 @aysheashea @eddiebaemunson @xlilithb @freakymunson @sidthedollface2 @i-wont-run-this-time @plk-18 @miserybeans @kylakins88 @deadspellz @thehillzhaveeyez @kayleeelena97 @foreverjosephquinn @punctualhowell @icallhimjoey @ghostinthebackofyourhead @siriuslysmoking @cancankiki @definitionwanderlust @eriancrow @1paire2vans @theonewiththecrackedmind @fromasgardandback @captainonaboat @josephquinnsfreckles @emilyslutface @alessxaa
crossed out = couldn't tag
101 notes · View notes
Note
AITA for basically being my cousins' 2nd/3rd parent and actually doing my aunts/uncles job for them
I (19 ???), have six young cousins on my mom's side who i see pretty often given everyone's schedules. Im really close with 4 of them, having grown up almost like siblings mainly with the two oldest. The two youngest dont care for me especially since one is only like 4 months old
Ive always been the reliable older brother/sisterish figure to them even when i was younger, it just came naturally. But in recent years ive had to pick up the slack in alot of things related to raising my cousins in a way. A goodish example is with the oldest, she's 16 and a few years ago I had to give her the sex and period talk cuz her school barely did anything about it (long story short they literally just gave out a basic (outdated) packet that basically just said "dont have sex, girl bleed once a month" in a horrible shameful way), and her parents just said "we'll explain when you're 18".
Ive done everything from teaching them internet safety to cooking to explain topics such as the sex talk because my aunts and uncles just dont do those things.
But enough context heres the main things,
One of my cousins called me dad in front of our relatives while we were all on vacation which caused a scene to say the least. It ended with me absolutely tearing into my aunts and uncles, which i admit wasnt the best choice but still, i basically tore into them about intentionally or not have almost completely abandoned their roles as parents. (Also one got tore into for basically forgetting their oldest in favor for their youngest so much so the oldest didnt get new clothes for two years)
The fight ended with me and my cousins storming back to the room we claimed and locking the door. We basically camped out there for the last two days if the trip, only leaving for food a night (had a bathroom connected to the room thankfully) we only really spoke to my mom and our grand uncle and aunt during that time
Its been about a month since it happened and things have atleast superficially calmed, still receiving the stray vague call out on social media and getting called an selfish asshole in a polite socially acceptable way. The only people on my side are my grand aunt and uncle, my mother, my cousins, and my friends
Im torn, because on one hand i care for my cousins and dont regret finally standing up for them all including myself.
But on the other its not completely my business on how my relatives raise their kids. I didnt have to do all that i do/did. I choose to do all those things and im still choosing to do them
I would speak to a professional or something but my last therapist dropped me cuz of stories bout my family (no joke she literally said "you're family is fucked up i have no hope in helping you, you're a lost cause") so tumblr what's your thoughts this probably out if yalls pay grade but still
What are these acronyms?
89 notes · View notes
thecynthh · 5 months
Text
smart ass - M.S pt 3
synopsis - matt’s not doing to well with his schooling but is determined to get his degree and pass his classes. one essay which is a huge part of their grade haunts him with a bad mark, luckily y/n is willing to help him
notes - descriptive make out scene, no actual smut , chris is a yapper, not proofread, low case intentional !
a/n - hey guys happy new year i kinda hate this one but i had yalls waiting on the next part long enough so enjoy 🫶
——————————————————————————
——————————————————————————
3:21
i feel a calloused hand graze my arm slightly tugging at it, the hand picks up mine and gives it a soft kiss. “come back down here” he says in a groggy voice, i listen to him and slowly slide down.
“ive been waiting to do this all night,” he tells me, moving from his spot he rolls almost completely on top of me, he hovers over so close to my face i feel his breath on my skin. “can i- can i kiss you?” he asks, looking into my eyes.
i nod scared to do anything else, “words smartass, i need words” he says still seeking for approval
“yes please” i say breathaly. his head dips down and out lips connect with a euphoric feeling. he envelopes my bottom lip slightly nibbling on it. a quiet moan escapes my lip, he takes the invitation to slip his tongue into my mouth.
he gives me his full attention and takes full control of the deep kiss. im in a whole new world, ive never felt this with another guy. granted there was only a hand full of guys who i let kiss me like this, but this feeling was new. it was full of lust and dominance it felt, right.
he slightly pulls back, “holy shit, i-i’m sorry” matt says in a worried tone. i was in a daze of foggy sexual thoughts and a little bit of confidence. something takes over me and i push matt down onto his headboard very faintly so as to not hurt him and begin to straddle him.
he takes in the sight of me underneath the warm glow of his lamp on his bedside table. my lacey white bra out for him to see, barely holding back my tits, my sweats hang low mirroring his revealing the strings to the matching white strings of my thong
“i hope you like what you see,” i guide my finger down his jawline and down to his neck, following my finger with small kisses finally landing on a spot underneath his ear. i bite down and suck and soon after soothing it by pressing my tongue against the same spot. i repeat my actions while whimpers spill out of his mouth. pulling back from him i admire my work thats very noticeably red right now.
my lips return to his and i slowly begin to move my hips against his, feeling his ever growing bulge that becomes more and more apparent as i stay persistence in my hip movements.
“i hope you dont have any plans tomorrow cause the only thing on my agenda is making sure you can't walk tomorrow” is all he says to me after he pulls my ear closer to his mouth. he leaves small pecks going from my ear all the way down my neck. i let out another breathy moan when he hits the base of my collarbone, he continues on his track down to the top of my breasts licking, sucking and leaving bruises behind.
“fucking hell matt,” is all i can get out as he moves towards the valley of my boobs. he really takes his time being soft in that area. as he gets closer towards my nipple he comes back up for air.
“can i take these of-“ matt gets cut off by another voice very similar to his, i don’t recognize it at first so my eyes flutter open. i look to the right and all i see matt’s face. he looked so peaceful, so, innocent. his arms are wrapped around my waist and the small of my back, our legs intertwined.
“mattyyyy” the door swings wide open, i jump up sitting. “oh hi y/n!” chris says, waving and smiling. “wait- Y/N??”
“no, no, no, i’m SO sorry i didn’t mean to fall asleep” i hop off matt’s bed losing the feeling of his touch. “again so sorry, this is probably crossing so many boundaries, especially being in your bed, and matt i don’t know how we ended up cuddling, i PROMISE it wasn’t me” i say barely having any breath left over. matt begins to sit up from his bed, his waves a mess and scruff beginning to show.
i grab my bag and whatever i can of my things and dash past chris, hitting his shoulder. my arms are full with my backpack, crew neck, laptop and phone.
i shove my phone into my pocket putting on my crew neck while going through the hallway almost tripping over my own feet, oh fuck this is going to be fun to tell to madi.
matt’s pov
“ughhhhhhhhhh” matt says folding downwards onto the pillow that i grabbed to soften my landing, chris still stands there absolutely stunned.
“wow nick and i spent one night out without you and you bring a girl to the house, no no no let me rephrase that, you brought Y/N to the house, into YOUR bed.” chris says, emphasizing my name like it was a crime to know me.
“kay, it’s just y/n you don’t have to make it sound so bad,” matt replies to chris’ exasperation.
“but that’s the thing! it was y/n the girl that last time i checked, you like!” chis says, i’m halfway through the hallway to the door and i almost trip over my own feet trying to keep going, i drop almost everything in my arms except for my laptop, my things clatter and hit the ground hard.
“oh fuck” chris says know he probably just let me in on is brothers secret.
i get on my knees grabbing as much shit as i can and continue booking it to my car.
a/n - imma ask who wants to be on the tag list soon so if ur interested just watch out for it :)
42 notes · View notes
Note
your post on regression grief hit me hard. i recently had a moment where for a couple hours i so vividly went back to when i was a kid, when it was the spring leading into summer during middle school and we all gathered in the open grassy field and played games. music played. the smell of the season was full of joy. ive been having more and more moments like this. the older i get and the more trauma i endure, the more i find myself having moments where i regress and cling to my tiger plushie and find myself talking a certain way. i go back to reliving these memories and its so comforting and simple.
Regressing is entirely new to me. i was told its something bad and “problematic”, so i was really scared when i started to put two and two together. do you have any advice for someone newly discovering this part of themself? (i know this is a heavy question so its okay if you dont!!)
Hi, friend ❤️❤️❤️ First of all, I have the impulse to say that I’m sorry for all the stress you’re under. While regression can be a very joyful thing, the side of it you usually see on the internet, it can also be that crushing, confusing grief. I hope some of what I’ll say can help.
First, I completely understand where you’re coming from. For me personally, regression is revisiting childhood because adulthood is hard and being a kid is just so much easier. Sometimes it feels like that’s the only safe place. Those memories are precious, and they are happy. (Some of my favorites are when I remember playing with my siblings, running around my backyard. Those were my favorite days)
My first piece of advice is that it’s okay to cling onto those memories and regress with them. It’s okay to have that bittersweet sting as you remember how simple life used to be. No matter who you are and what your situation is growing up is it’s own kind of trauma—suddenly being faced with responsibility and work, when it seemed only yesterday we didn’t have to worry about a thing. So, it’d natural to miss those easy times, and to wish for the, back. If that make you regress, then that’s okay.
I am actually fairly new to regression as well. I started trying age dreaming a year or so ago to try and cope with stress (with moderate success), but it wasn’t until the past few months that I’ve actually started to do regress routinely and consider myself a member of the community. I will admit that before I framed my regression negatively. I felt almost ashamed of myself for not handling my stress in a “typical fashion”. Which brings me to my next piece of advice. There is nothing wrong with regression. If you’ve been on this side of the Internet for long enough, I’m sure you’ve heard it before, but I’m saying it again. Age regression is completely okay, it is a valid coping mechanism.It takes time to let go of those negative outlooks and preconceptions (believe me, I know) But you have Avery supportive, kind, and fun community agere, and we’d all be happy to help you however we can.
For me, the best way to get comfortable with regressing was to take baby steps. It doesn’t have to be grand gestures like decorating your bedroom as a nursery (tho if that’ll make you more comfortable, then go for it!) personally, I started small. Watching Disney movies. Sleeping with a stuffed animal every night. Coloring with crayons and coloring books instead of my fancy colored pencils. Eventually, it became natural.
However I would also like to point out that not all regression is sunshine and rainbows (unfortunately.). It’s also that space where we recognize our trauma through a child’s perspective, and that’s hard. It’s okay and normal for regression to be difficult or painful.
Nonetheless, it’s important to take care of those feelings. remember that you deserve this safe place.
I think the most important thing I can say is to indulge in it. Your mind will thank you. Personally, I’ve honestly been handling life so much better, recalling lost childhood memories I would have forgotten about, and just generally feeling happier since I’ve allowed myself to regress when I need to.
I hope some of this was helpful. Sorry if it was a bit scatterbrained. If I think of anything else, I’ll edit this later. And If you need anything else, whether to ask some more questions or just need a listening ear, I’m always available! ❤️❤️❤️❤️ Lots of love to you, friend, sending lots of warm, happy vibes your way
-Marty 💙
16 notes · View notes