#and like it's a valid way to enjoy music right. i just didn't understand how it could be any other way

[epicfranb]

Idk how correct it is to attribute the entire path your life has taken to a single event but i think if my childhood friend didn't say "that's the kind of music teenage guys listen to" when i was introducing her to Skillet when we were like 10, i think i would be way more info music and bands now.

[hitoshitoshi]

Teacher!Caleb would be an elementary teacher if he wasn't a pilot. He's just so patient with the kids, but he's also stern when he needs to be. Teacher!Caleb would teach kids in a way where they could all have fun so that way, they associate learning with fun, and not feel bored while learning. He would make it a competition for who can learn vocabulary the quickest, and have small prizes for them to enjoy.

Teacher!Caleb would make sure to learn each of the kid's likes and dislikes and incorporating it into the examples that he uses so it feels more personalized. "Mhm, you're right on track there, you have a team of 6 Pokemon, and 4 faints, how many Pokemon do you have on your team? [...] That's right, you have 2 Pokemon on your team! You're so smart. How about if you have 3 Pokemon, and you want to double your team—"

Teacher!Caleb would make sure that during lunch time, no kid would go hungry, so he always had a cabinet of snacks, filled with yummy but also nutritious things for them to eat. He was a kid once too, so he knew how much kids wouldn't eat something if he knew that they didn't like the taste of something, regardless of how hungry they were. Whenever a kid runs up to him with their little legs, he already knows the protocol and pulls out his drawer. "Pick any of 'em you want that you want to eat. The whole world — well, drawer — is yours to choose from."

Teacher!Caleb would make sure that no one gets left out and made fun of. He himself, was an empathetic indivudual, and if he was witnessing any bullying, he was going to stop it right then and there. No one gets put down in when he's around, much less in his classroom. Fun Teacher!Caleb was gone the second that there was disrespect going on. He would pull the kid to the side, and make them understand what empathy was, and how the kid wouldn't like it if someone was mean to the kid, so the kid shouldn't be mean to others. He would make sure the kid apologizes to whoever they were mean to — a proper apology: a sorry, the specifics of what they did and why they're sorry, and what they were going to do to change. Teacher!Caleb wasn't going to let these kids grow up to be people who didn't ever apologize or take accountability for their own actions. He took his job very seriously. Teacher!Caleb would make sure that no kids would associate any bad marks or failure with bad connotations. He knew how some kids depended on academic validation, or was stressing because of their parents, so he makes sure to change that mindset so it wouldn't become worse later on. "No, no, no, don't call yourself a failure for not passing a test. Think about it this way, you know what you got wrong and you know what type of studying doesn't work out for you. Instead of focusing on that, think about what you can do for the re-test. You know what you don't know, what you do know, and what form of studying doesn't work for you! That's called "failing forward". Always, move forward and don't stay in the past." Teacher!Caleb would be the type to use his own money to have end-of-the-year parties. It wouldn't be just pizza, but other food too! Pizza, fries, wings, cake, and more. He wanted the kids to celebrate and have a good time before ending the school year — to relax and hang out with eachother one last time before summer vacation started, where some of the kids would be separated from other kids when they move up a grade. He would play fun music and pull out pictures of his partner (you) and show you off to the kids. "Ahahah, yeah! This is my partner, aren't they super cool? I love them to bits and pieces. They're actually my childhood best friend—" Teacher!Caleb would want to make a difference; to actually help kids grow up. He wasn't just a teacher that taught kids schoolwork, he wanted to teach them the foundations of life through different ways of seeing things and learning. He wanted to be that teacher that made others excited to learn. He wanted to be that teacher that people can rely on. He wanted to be that teacher that helped change and guide people's lives in a positive way. He wanted to be that teacher that helped people discover things about themselves. He wanted to be that teacher that helped people to learn to love and respect other people and themselves. He wanted to be the teacher that he never got growing up. He wanted to be that teacher for others.

If you like otome games, including Love and Deepspace, you should join Linkon Lounge! A discord server that's LGBTQ+ friendly (only serving those who are 18+) where we all can share our interests, talk to roleplaying bots (Caleb, Rafayel, Zayne, Xavier, and Sylus), and have fun game, movie, and stream nights where we stream games and/or cards that we pulled that others want to see. It would be super fun to have you as a member of our server.

Click here to join Linkon Lounge!

Masterlist

[tangledinink]

what's your centaurworld opinions?

spoilers below if you care.

I'm so torn on that show, because there are parts where I think it's beautiful and compelling and visually stunning, but there are also parts where I'm just... so disappointed in it? Like, I commend it for being out there and taking risks and trying to be different, but like...

You know the opening scene in the very first episode? Before Horse ends up in Centaurworld? And we get the whole Rider's Lullaby Thing before Horse and Rider get seperated? After that I was immediately, like... so disappointed. Because right off the bat I was like! Well... I don't care about this world or this story, quite frankly, I care about that world that we saw before! about Horse's world! About her and Rider! And, like, yes, I know the plot is about "oh this is how Horse gets back to her world and gets back to Rider," but, like, at least for me, none of the Centaurworld characters really won me over, esp not at first. I didn't give a shit about them or their world! So they were really just... in the way. They were obstacles standing in between me and getting to see more of Horse and Rider's story, and that's, like, idk, maybe not what you want? For your main cast?

That's not to say that I hated it, because I didn't hate the first season! There were episodes and moments that I enjoyed, and I liked most of the music, as well, but I really wasn't a fan of the second season at all.

I HATED the birdtaur episode. Like! I HATED the whole gimmick where they treated Horse and her Herd as a 'TV show' and the main cast were all annoyed at them for 'treating their lives live entertainment' and judging Horse's decision to split up with Rider as like? A kind of subtle jab at criticisms from fans because it... it doesn't work!? Like, in the show, Horse's main defense against the Birdtaurs saying that the ending of season 1 wasn't good and 'felt empty' since they did all this build-up to reunite with Rider only to immediately leave her again was "well this is my real life!!!"

Okay, but, like... it's still a TV show. If the Birdtaurs are a stand-in for real Centaurworld fans, then Horse's defense... doesn't work at all? Because it's not her real life. It's a make-believe TV show. That you seemingly have no actual defense for. (Because it's... it's valid criticism, actually...) Also just in general making fun of your own fans is, like... stupid, I think.

I also feel like season 2 totally assassinated Wammawink's character? I liked her in season 1! She was overbearing and protective and a bit much sometimes, but one of her main character traits is that she loves her herd and is their caretaker, and she wants to ensure they're safe and protected at all times... in season 2 she just? Doesn't seem to care about them at all? She spends the entire second season just being so self-absorbed and catty the entire time, and it makes no sense.

I didn't like Durpleton, Glendale, or Ched at all, they were all just... too annoying for me to enjoy.

I'm still fucking mad that literally ALL the main cast got at least some kind of backstory/side-story type thing... except Zulius, for some reason? Despite being a fan-favorite (and my personal fav because I mean. Come ON. He's just fun.)

I understand it's a kid's show and they're gonna have silly moments and jokes and comic relief, etc etc etc, okay, sure, there will be fart jokes, fine, not my taste but it's fine it wasn't made for me, whatever. But it often felt like... the show wasn't allowed to breathe? There was no point where it truly took itself seriously. There always had to be some dumb heeheehaha fart joke shoehorned in. Which is, like, fine, if you wanna be a fart joke show, that's fine! It's just that Centaurworld also tries to be an edgy drama at the same time, and it just... I don't think it pulls off being both. Comedy and drama can definitely exist at the same time but! There are times when you have to allow the show to be one or another! Is this a dramatic character moment? Just be a dramatic character moment! It often felt like Centaurworld truly was not capable of even having a single scene with some 'bad-dum-ts' fart joke moment in it, which made it very hard for me to? Take any of it seriously or enjoy it.

Also, I hated the Nowhere King's story. I thought he was so dumb and uncompelling. I know he's the bad guy and you're not supposed to LIKE him but like? When they told us the backstory I think they expected us to, you know, feel SORRY for him? And I didn't! At all! I found no part of his story to be sympathetic. That guy was just a fucking idiot the whole way through, just repeatedly shooting himself in the foot by being this self-important "I'm not like other centaurs" dude while at the same time being all "woe is me this girl will never like me since I'm a centaur so I won't even ATTEMPT to get to know her at all, I'm gonna jump straight to crimes against nature and deceiving her." I thought that guy was stupid and I did not care about him.

ALSO? HOW THE FUCK DOES THE PORTAL KEY WORK? Like??? It makes NO sense to me??? Like, sure, apparently, it keeps the Rift open to connect the two worlds or whatever, I guess, but then it also like, just... does other magick? It can just??? Separate centaurs, for some fucking reason? Which I don't understand? Is that just what the key does? Open the rift AND de-centaur people? Or is it just a generic magick item that can do anything? But then also the Nowhere King could make minotaurs... without the key??? It makes no fucking sense to me and I think it's dumb.

... I like the songs, though, and the animation is really pretty. Also I thought the ending was dumb lol.

[mamaladeskies]

What's Drake Doing? And Other Thoughts

Wa Gwan Delilah

So Drake just dropped 'Wah Gwan Delilah' and it's not receiving much love from twitter.

Aubrey's Angels are liking it though, claiming it to be satire.

Not every one of the Angels liked it though and they were quickly labelled as not being fun at parties because sometimes "it ain't even gotta be deep I guess"

I listened to the song and I thought it would have been okay if the autotune was not present which I guess is part of the satire. Still, the autotune was so bad it made it hard to concentrate on what was being said. A second listen is out of the question. In fact, as I write this I am trying to forget what the song was about.

I'm kind of debating between this and Sexxy Red's 'U My Everything' which caused worse ear damage.

But Why Did Drake Put Out Such a Song?

Why would he ruin 'Hey There Delilah' like that? 😭

Is he just trolling Kendrick? Kendrick called out Drake in numerous instances for not being himself; a Canadian with a middle class background who's not about the "tough" life he seems to glamorise. Kendrick even went as far as imitating the Toronto accent to put his point across!

If Drake is trolling Kendrick, I don't understand why he had to do it this way. Why! Rapping over the BBL Drizzy beat would have been okay, but on that Sexxy Red's song? And this Delilah song with that God awful autotune? "every antic is feelin' distasteful"

Dude think about your passerby fans. The one's who like your pop songs and don't mind that you cosplay being gangster or the fake accents, the ones who play you in clubs because of the catchy tunes, the ones who give you those streaming numbers you like. They won't get that you're "cheesin', fam".

Mind you, I don't like Drake. Matter of fact, I hate that dude. Before, I didn't care for him, he wasn't on my radar like that, but then he dissed Meg and I had a valid reason to HATE (I didn't know about the grooming allegations then). ☹️

I tried to get into Drake's stuff when 'If You're Reading This it's Too Late' came out but his music wasn't for me.

The few songs I've enjoyed of his I can count on one hand and only one, 'Fucking Problems', ever made it to my playlists and that I can largely attribute to how nice a group effort it was, Drake is really good with the melodies.

Yeah, I don't like him BUT crodie get up!!

But, like in a way that makes sense.

As many of Aubrey's Angels have pointed out, Drake is in a damned if he do, damned if he don't situation. What I personally refer to as "if it's not the consequences of my actions".

If he had taken a break, he would have been trolled for being silent.

BUT if Drake had come out with a banger... what then? If he came out with a banger that broke #1 he would have still been trolling Kendrick. In fact, he should have made one that ensured everyone dances and waves their hands for a decade to come.

Let's wait and find out, he's going to be in Camila Cabello's Album so maybe that will be his big come back? Though I've seen him being trolled for this collab, as it is playing into the allegations of him being a culture vulture because he chose to work with Camila who did some racist stuff in the past, right here on Tumblr, and I just love how the internet never lets her forget.

Did Drake Really Lose?

Drake lost on the internet. Though both he and Kendrick have been accused of serious stuff, (domestic violence and grooming), the internet is very keen on hating Drake. Do I secretly love it? No, I'm very publicly in love with it, let's never let the Drake hate go.

Reason why I said on the internet is because people at work still play Drake in the cafeteria and no one got it when I played 'Not Like Us'. If I have to hear 'God's Plan' one more time...

Drake kind of lost the streaming war. Drake in general is one of the most streamed people ever, he always tops the charts and when Spotify wrapped comes out I am always disappointed to see he is a lot of people's number one.

But before 'Euphoria' and shortly after 'Like That', I remember listening to 'Good Kid Maad City' and Kendrick was at 62M monthly listeners, now he's at 78M, he's broken a bunch of records that were previously held by Drake with his diss songs and his albums are charting again.

Drake, on the other hand, his new songs are being trolled, even his pre-beef songs are not doing very well with daily streams, he hasn't lost listeners though but he's not gained many new ones.

Everyone and their grandma seemed to listen to 'Not Like Us'. It was being played in Brown weddings, a bar mitzvah and an Anime Convention with the crowd actually singing along. One month later it is still going strong. Mind you Aubrey's Angels were saying Kendrick's songs are not bops, but not many are bopping to 'Family Matters'.

Why Did Kendrick Win the Rap Beef?

Kendrick won! This is not just a biased opinion of someone who has loved his music since I saw his performance of 'The Blacker The Berry' during the 2016 Grammys, but also as a Drake hater. 😊

What I expected from this battle is for Drake to win, not because he's the better lyricist but because I thought it would be a popularity contest and Drake is more popular.

So Kendrick won because he is the better rap artist, he read that man to filth, he had a better strategy, he had a better understanding of his opponent, and he crafted such a good narrative on 'Euphoria' that predicted where this beef would go:

Kendrick dropping 'Meet the Grahams' less than an hour after Drake pushed the red button with 'Family Matters' and Drake not understanding 'Mother I Sober' in 'The Heart Part 6'. Here is where Drake lost me.

Okay he lost me with the you're short and have small feet in 'Push Ups'. "Drop, drop, drop, drop" was catchy though, I admit. Drop, drop, drop, drop that album Kendrick!

Kendrick did his homework, quoting "remember" and "it's too many options" but Drake didn't. Kendrick basically spilled all his trauma in 'Mr. Morale & The Big Steppers' and gave Drake free ammo that he didn't use.

Clearly this is why Drake is not on that conscious shit, he doesn't have the literacy for it.

Drake made fun of Kendrick's fiancé for being lightskin in 'Family Matters' instead of calling him out for cheating with a white woman. Then Drake said Kendrick's son is lightskin when clearly he is not.

The lies! Let's not even start.

He could have gone harder on Kendrick for working with Kodak Black, who has an ugly history and really hates (Black) women, and Dr. Dre who has a history of domestic violence then tied it together with his own accusations that "they hired a crisis management team to clean up the fact that you beat on your queen". Someone teach Drake how to craft narratives.

Lastly, he should have focused on Kendrick alone, no one cares about your beef with Rick Ross crodie!

But Why Did Drake Lose the People?

Drake being a culture vulture, his grooming allegations and having Baka around have never been reason enough to incite deep criticism from the people before because we've seen how society loves to look away from such allegations, Kendrick's alleged domestic violence is being dismissed, such allegations are not even taken seriously in instances like for Chris Brown where there is undeniable proof.

So in Drake's instance, people are actually choosing to believe these allegations now.

And that's what I am curious about why now?

[mlobsters]

supernatural s11e4 baby (w. robbie thompson)

i've seen a number of gifs from this episode and i've built it up in my mind as an episode i should enjoy which makes me nervous to watch it :S

enjoying the variety of shots being in baby's pov and the guitar man by bread, nice choice (night after night who treats you right)

very fic-ish slice of life domestic vibes. both jared and jensen seem to be leaning into their accents more than usual, i often wonder about that. what decides when they do it, if it's a choice (i can only imagine it is). anyway, it's very... homey. relaxed

very normal

ack making me cry with all these smiles and sweetness. robbie, this is the fanservice i needed (and deserved). goddamn what a breath of fresh air it's like concentrated version of old times with just the two of them, but being relaxed and happy for a minute as the cherry on top.

DEAN Piper? That's awesome. Heather. One-night wonders, man. Shoot, we're lucky we still get that at all. SAM Really? You don't... ever want something more? DEAN I'm sorry, have you met us? We're batting a whopping zero in domestic life, man. Goose eggs. SAM You don't ever think about something? Not marriage or whatever. But... something? You know, with a hunter? Somebody who understands the life? DEAN Have you not heard a single word Bob's been singing about? You're tired. I can tell. You're exhausted. Well, I'm still wired, so I'm gonna pull over, get some gas. You hop in the back, get some Z's 'cause, buddy, you earned 'em. Proud of ya! Piper. Mmm. Man, she smelled good, too.

yes, sam, you're right. dean should consider settling down with a hunter—oh wait. wonder what that "have you not heard a single word bob's been singing about" means though. i'm not that familiar with his catalogue of work :p

was someday soon in this show before or am i getting weepy over it because it was used in a fic? signs point to a fic

He loves his damned old rodeo As much as he loves me Someday soon, going with him Someday soon

--

JOHN You okay, pal? You look a little spooked. It's nice to be back behind the wheel. Looks like Dean's taken good care of this old beast. Seems like he's taken good care of you, too.

literally sobbing what even is happening. wish fulfillment that dean could get the parental approval and validation that he did a good job with sam, and acknowledging how much he did raising him.

and this has nothing to do with my own dead father issues and desperate desire for approval, no way.

that i'm not pissy that it's john saying it should say how much this kicked me in the gut

JOHN What you said about relationships, wanting something more... I never wanted this for you boys. This life. Not really. SAM We turned out okay. JOHN You did, didn't you? But that was on you boys. You did that, not me. SAM Well, you played your part. JOHN I did my best, anyway, for what it was worth. SAM This isn't real. JOHN I never could fool you, could I?

so is this lucifer? show brought him up making a fuss in the cage with the darkness busting out, and the whole i never could fool you thing. like he showed up as jess (??) in a dream did sam figure it out? no, he didn't know. hmmm. surely not god though :p

SAM I prayed when I was in that church, and I saw... something. And now, here you are, whoever you are, whatever you are. What the hell is this? JOHN Dream. Vision. Call it what you want. The message is still the same. The Darkness is coming... and only you boys can stop it.

again, i rag on the musical score a lot but the foley and overall sound design minus the score tends to really be noticeably good. and i really like what they did with the sound and the filming in this scene. where there's kind of a low wavering thrumming hum and their voices sound more close up. and i really liked that they didn't do any noise hits when he flashes back briefly to the torture vision, it was just a little extra very low soft bass thumping with the flashes. all that combined with these super tight close shots of their faces kind of adds to the slightly uneasy/unreality feeling. very nice

DEAN Welcome to the Winchester Motel. We don't have cable, but we do have room service. You were singing in your sleep, that song mom loved that dad used to always play for us. I think I've actually still got the tape.

great, another song i can have an additional layer of weepiness over, confirmed mom favorite.

SAM I think I've been having visions, too, lately. I mean, it's just images. I mean, more of a feeling, really. But I just had one right now, and Dad was in it. But it wasn't dad like the Dad that I grew up with. It was Dad when he was our age. And I guess it wasn't even really Dad. It was someone pretending to be Dad and -- DEAN Okay, what makes you say that? SAM For starters, he told me everything I wanted to hear.

you and me both, friend

dean really going in on the accent in this conversation in the car. i'm not one to anthropomorphize cars (i love cars and my car) but they're definitely getting to me with that whole.. baby has bore witness to so many conversations and fights and... like the hannibal quote

from s2e13 mizumono HANNIBAL You sit in that chair, as you have so many times before. It holds among its molecules the vibrations of all our conversations ever held in its presence.

also my own personal wish granted that sam would own up to something he was hiding, the visions are a start

SAM He said, "God helps those who help themselves." I mean, maybe these visions are coming from God. DEAN Whoa. Pump the brakes.

brief terror that lucifer is getting those prayers and will lead our sam the (at times) believer astray because he thinks it's god

the wins keep coming, sam telling dean about being infected. thank you, robbie, good sir. to keep things reasonable dean blows off the visions because he's mad or whatever

DEAN Come on, man. That quote? "God helps those who help themselves"? God didn't say that. That's not even in the Bible. That's an old proverb that dates way back to Aesop. I read.

it's so hit or miss on whether dean is well read or it's a joke that he doesn't know about stuff. consistency! 🥴 he read the odyssey, didn't know who calliope is, etc. i know i've talked about this before but can't find it.

DEAN I have that dream every couple of months. Kind of comforting, actually.

and dean's dream about john and having a normal life? i haven't felt this many feelings since probably s5. and all the little domestic canon tidbits they're feeding us, just wow

DEAN I know what you're trying to do here. You're trying to find some -- some greater meaning to it all. Right? Some fate to what went down. But I'm telling you, Sam. The Darkness? It's on us. And no one's gonna help us, certainly not God, so we'll have to figure this thing out, like we always do. But until then we hunt.

don't love how he's blowing him off (though i mean, not terribly unexpected), do appreciate that sam reiterated that he doesn't think it was just a dream

even in the fake recreated car interior sam looks so uncomfortably cramped. and as ever consider there's an actual roof over their heads to contend with when contemplating them full on fucking back there in fic :p

the deputy i looked up because he's a redhead and looks kinda like sheriff stilinksi from teen wolf, it's the guy that was in a different ep of spn (7x04) that i looked up because he's pale and freckly. and he was in altered carbon.

it's so interesting how natural the episode is flowing even with the rather large limitation of having everything take place in the car, and not feel gimmicky. even this little interlude with the girls on the joyride is lifted by an excellent song choice, and the scene seems to be referencing the video, and they're doing an actual car stunt that we get to see from the inside

what a banger, damn and that video is amazing. only m.i.a. song i knew was paper planes via slumdog millionaire

okay well having an emotional breakdown every 5 minutes apparently has made this such that i can't wrap this up tonight. tbc

all right i was a little higher than anticipated yesterday so we'll see if the ✨Feelings ✨are the same with nothing in my system

was thinking last night that dean would likely notice his car being dusty as shit after doing donuts in a dirt lot :P but i'm glad she got to have her fun consequence-free, and Baby too

silly

so pleased with himself. this is all very cute honestly. it could have gone over the top slapstick having to keep dealing with this were-pire that won't die, but there was some restraint. the muffled growling and snarling from the cooler is just the right kind of goofy for me (not having music i think helps)

MRS. MARKHAM Your family. You do anything for them, don't you? DEAN Absolutely. Yeah, but not if it costs too much. [ Chuckles ] MRS. MARKHAM No. You do everything for them. Everything else is meaningless.

little on the nose but i'll take it :p that extended fight scene inside the car with her was a lot but

DONELLY It's like I said, I need help, every strong hand I can find. And I need an army to fight the Darkness. Oh, it's comin', for all of us. There's nothing hunters or any human can do about it.

is there some sort of monster memo going out about the darkness? we all need to band together against the darkness!

i give my car kisses like that too LOL

awkward

<3

DEAN We'll get Cas to fix you up. SAM Only if he fixes you up, too. DEAN Okay, mom. Let's go home. SAM You know what? We are home.

thank you, robbie.

There was no score for this episode. All music was diegetic: either coming from an outside source or the Impala's cassette deck. The scenes used in the episode for the Impala's cassette deck were used from 5.22 Swan Song.

i'm not gonna say that this episode was way better for not having a score, wait. no. i am gonna say it. thank you, for that choice

During the filming of the episode, during the scenes where the Deputy Donelly attacks Dean, Jensen found the remains of the Impala that was smashed up at the end of 1.22 Devil's Trap.

i can't remember an episode i wholeheartedly enjoyed as much as this one in a long damned time. i needed that. along with some somewhat cathartic sobbing :p skin cleared, crops watered, etc

[skinnytuna]

(i'm anon who replied to your long post about audience validation and art)

thank you for your response, it's very interesting. it's actually kinda funny because I used to be a person who never, ever shared anything I did with other people (online or in person). I wouldn't talk about the media I enjoyed or showed the drawings I made. it always felt too intimate - I was only doing it for myself and so having other people's eyes on it wouldn't add anything to my enjoyment apart from shame from not liking or creating the 'perfect' thing. if I imagined what I would do in the future, it was only from the perspective of what I would actually create, rather than the validation it would give me.

and then my world view flipped, I guess as I became increasingly exposed to online validation. I still dont share anything I make but if I (indulgently) daydream about creating something, it is rarely purely the process of creation that I think about. I cant separate the stuff I do and the response I would get like I could as a kid. this is probably partly because of watching numbers rise online. but maybe it could also just be the sad reality of transitioning into adulthood? when you are young the stuff you make is never going to get you shit. but when you are older, you are expected to view the world with a transactional slant: whatever you give, you must get back in return.

idk how into fandoms you are but I love them because they are a way to remove that dependence on transaction (both monetary and inter-personal validation) we have. obviously, fandoms mostly exist in an online world and so some people are going to be more successful at creating than others (and some people might even manage to make a tiny amount of money) but mostly they are pretty equal. most artists (fic writers/fan artists) are only creating for the sake of creation. they like something, want to improve it or want to explore a world and so they create. some fanfic writers will never get past 100 kudos on a single work, but they still write thousands and thousands of more words. this is because, for them, writing is a hobby and a way to have fun. they are literally unable to monetise it, and the possible size of a response is often limited by the tiny size of a niche fandom.

fan fiction is wholly and unapologetically amateur. it can be a great quality, but writers have the freedom to create imperfect things and learn as they go. there are no critics, book sales or best seller lists - you can just make shit and put it out there if you want.

idk if any of that made sense but yeah

it's funny you say that about adulthood because there are so many like. 13 year old rappers now who are solely in it for the money or dont understand why they are doing it and their parents are encouraging them to do it for the money so like. childhood for us was very different to what childhood currently is, right now this year.

but i personally cant remember a time when i wasn't desperate for validation like when i was playing guitar when i was 8 or 10 i still had that "i hope im good enough i want to be good enough without trying" feeling it's just the people i wanted to impress were like, authority figures. i wanted my guitar teacher to think i was cool. i wanted my moms friends to think i was funny. i'm still afraid of doing anything i haven't already learned how to do, writing is the first New thing i've attempted in maybe my entire adulthood.

it's kind of funny, when i was younger i didn't realize how bad i was at writing music and that's the only reason i stuck to it long enough to learn anything. i was like laughably bad at it in high school and no one really went out of there way to grab me by the shoulders and say "hey! you suck at this! stop!" though a bunch of people did tell me it kinda sucked. i mostly just thought they were wrong. they weren't. but now part of me doesn't believe i could ever be any good at something that isn't that. like when i write fiction i know on a cognitive level if it ends up being good it's not because i worked hard or earned it or anything it's just a complete fluke. and i don't even really believe people when they tell me it's good. even though obviously i'm only posting it so people will tell me it's good.

in a way i feel like i'm sort of shifting back to the way i was in high school... every piece of art i make im like "this is the best shit ever" and then i post it and if people tell me it sucks im like "lol. incorrect. your tastes are Unrefined" and then i keep making more whatever crap whatever. which honestly is the best way to live i think. i have some people in my life who really like, respect and admire that i make whatever the fuck i want without ever really considering whether or not i should. which is funny because i have a lot of people in my life who are like, Normal artists, who Think before they make something, and try to make Good Things and i envy them greatly because it really comes through in the work.

though obviously as an evil bastard communist i am a strong believer that "Bad" Art Is Radical and "Good" Art is Bourgeois Idealism and i find myself constantly torn between, the allure of timesinks and iteration and the mystique of hyperprolific stream of consciousness artists and i feel like i'm the worst of both worlds by not being fully one way or the other! but i guess not everyone can be Lil B and not everyone can be Frank Ocean and some of us need to sit in between those two extremes...

look at all this me talking about how i never stop and think about the art while i'm stopping and thinking about the art... i'm an Olympic level liar rn.

i've never read a fanfiction in my life (outside of like.. homestuck smut when i was fifteen. which i guess Technically Counts.) but as the form is widely derided i'm sure it has the most artistic merit of any thing. i think a lot about what a world would be like where money and art are completely unrelated. and all art exists completely separate from how much dollars it can make a corporation. would being popular even matter? would people still seek fame... complicated questions. Way if we pees form butts

[winter-tospring]

decided to check out challengers tonight because it's been all over my dash for freaking weeks and I've been so annoyed by it tbh being grumpy about it, I just felt like I wouldn't enjoy it and was topping my fomo with spite but listen....I skipped to the first few minutes and the first track came on........I was hooked and doomed to love this. these fucking beats are my VIBE and god did it work so freaking well.

so I ended up watching it because at that point I had to. wasn't going to tonight, but my wife was alright to go along with it, so we watched it.

MY. GOD. I understand and I'm sorry for judging this in my head before. This was satisfying and compelling on so many levels I LOVED it. I truly get it, tumblr. You were right. I validate the hype. I cannot believe this. Absolutely in my top movies of the year 😭

God this was just CINEMA. MADE for this medium. The freaking soundtrack was so essential, but the angles???? The directing???? The camera choices!!!!!! PLUS the pace with the slow mo moments, the creative and cinematic shots, goddddd. The tension sustained throughout!!!!

I am.........ugh. Truly shook and inspired. I loved how passionate this felt. I loved that, for all the dramatisation with the slow mo and music etc, it didn't make me feel like I was watching a Movie, rightfully dramatized because it's a movie, but like I was there, experiencing it, the way when you go about your life you naturally, in your head, give yourself a background music, or dramatize how cinematic you think you or your surroundings or your movement look. It looked and felt like how it feels to romanticize/cinematize your life. That's fucking thrilling to see in a literal movie!!! And makes me wanna go workout and do that very romanticizing!!!! And take pictures!!!!! Man!

No hate at all to gifset but really without context and movement+music, it takes away or rather lacks of so much of what makes the movie come to life and be incredible. So if you're hesitating to watch based on the plot you're gathering from posts, don't think about it. This movie's all about pacing and beat and movement. It's SO fitting for a sports movie, my god I want ten, I want specifically this for a dance movie, give me it. Most of the pull for me is the form, yeah, but oh the characters, and their interpersonal dynamics are SO interesting. I thought I knew before, but really, again....i did not know enough, lmao. Seeing the scene in gifsets vs. in the movie feels entirely different. I'm entirely more fascinated now than I was before, even though I'd gathered a sense of what their relationship to each other was.

This is rare for me to say but I would probably even re-watch this someday. It felt so passionate for the medium and inspiring to watch. Truly kind of obsessed with the artfulness of it all. Oops.

[lillefromsiberia]

Leaving The Gaylor Community

When I started to listen to Taylor Swift, I was so excited. Her voice and her lyrics were a comfort to me. I would fall asleep to her music, I would do my chores to it, it was my obsession and for a person who usually just simply enjoys things it was new and exciting to be so bewitched by something.

I soon realised that some of her songs didn't make sense to me, and while I was researching on what could she mean by some of her lyrics I stumbled upon gaylor theory, and everything made sense. So much sense that I was speechless. All I could do was read countless posts and watch presentations over and over again, because the analysis of her lyrics was SO GOOD and it made SO MUCH SENSE.

I began to feel this spiritual bond with Taylor, as a closeted queer person. I felt like I knew her, and she knew me, even though we have never met and will never meet, but we understood each other. I didn't feel alone.

And, honestly, I also was invested in the drama and the secrets of it all. We all love to gossip, very human (and sometimes very useful) thing to do, so I wanted to talk about it with someone, I wanted to be up to date with gaylor lore, I wanted to read what people think, so I joined Tumblr. And I was not dissapointed.

The humor, the analysis, the theories - all of it was amazing.

And then the drama with the NYT article happened.

At first I was FUMING. I was so annoyed that I even deleted some of what I wrote because I posted some not so chill takes. It was intense. I was intense.

I calmed down in a day, of course, but the conversation was still going, and going... and I started to become curious about what people were saying. I mean, I knew what I agreed with, but what kind of points are they making against that article? Are they all slightly to moderate homophobic, or are there actual valid takes that I haven't seen yet? I wanted to know.

So, yesterday I watched a video by a queer person who was angry about the article. I've read some comments under that video.

I don't remember any arguments/points, but I saw how triggered people were, it stuck with me and I honestly felt bad. They were hurt, scared, angry, frustrated, they lashed out - I mean, everything I did. I know how that feels.

I fell asleep thinking about it all. Their perspective, my perspective, and the questionable importance of me holding on to something that at the end of the day doesn't change anything in my life.

And the truth is that I don't feel okay being a part of this community anymore when I saw how much pain it was causing to queer people. I can't ignore the truth of their emotional experience. Maybe it causes the same pain to Taylor. I don't know and will never know, but the thought of it haunts me and I feel bad.

Also, I realised that I lost control a little bit and started to become delusional at some point. I actually forgot that I don't know her. I grew too confident about my opinions and I began to view them as facts.

So, I choose to leave. This was a wonderful experience that I'll never forget, I've never been a part of a fandom like that. It was awesome.

I feel awkward right now. A lot of you followed me because I was active in the gaylor community. I don't know what I am going to do with this account.

But I know that I will not be a part of the swiftie fandom at all, starting now. If there's a chance that she's straight (and there is, because at the end of the day we don't know for sure) her behaviour during Lover era was not okay and I don't feel comfortable supporting her in this way.

Anyway, feel free to unfollow me, and I am sorry. I know that this post will upset some people who I like on here, and I hope they'll understand that it's just a decision that makes me feel comfortable and at peace. I don't want you to think that I am trying to make a point, I am just updating and explaining my decision because it felt weird and rude to just disappear.

I strongly believe that we all should always decide for ourselves and do what feels right. Keep doing what you think is right for you, babes, I fully support you.

Thank you for being so amazing, kind and smart. I wish you all the best, my darlings.

I loved being a part of this little world with you.

[aotopmha]

Looking at Labyrinthos overall, there are a total of four chores you're given.

Go to a tour of Labyrinthos with the Loporrits and Urianger, go find 8 scholars that need help, carry boxes with Alphinaud and Alisae and kill stuff for G'raha.

They're all set to the tones of the same music loop.

At one point it just kind of became funny to me.

But out of all of those I feel like even just finding 4 different scholars with no chance of failure given to you would've made this section so much better.

In fact, I would rather have had a solo duty that went through a Dalamud fragment as a replacement for most of this.

But I also like to look for the good stuff within stuff I don't particularly like.

And I think it's a pretty common opinion that Urianger's reunion with Moenbryda's parents is the best scene to come out of Labyrinthos.

It makes so many people cry and it has gotten me many times, too.

Why, though?

Moenbryda was only there for a single patch before she was killed.

And I feel the answer is pretty simple: I think this scene is very good at validating grieving for a loved one.

It makes you understand what Moenbryda meant to the characters who cared about her.

And while we technically didn't get to know Moenbryda that well, we've spent a lot of time with Urianger and we care for him.

So it hits many really strongly.

So, imagine if we would've known her for the entirety of the ARR patch content and the game actually put in the work to make her a complete character?

This scene somehow manages to be one of the most memorable moments of Endwalker and it's not even perfectly backed up by substance.

I would put Fourchenault being proven wrong in second place in terms of important scenes in Labyrinthos.

I think it also isn't as earned as it could've been because I don't believe in Fourchenault's change of heart as strongly as I wish I could, but I absolutely enjoy him smacked in the face for treating his children the way he did.

They proved him wrong via their actions because that's how it works with him.

But one idea that struck me here is how similar he is to Zenos in one aspect: being absolutely awful at connecting with people.

Pushing your family away is not a way to protect them and is, in fact, unhealthy and hurtful behavior.

It's *understandable*, but so much busy work could've been avoided if Fourchenault explained himself from the outset.

And not even the big picture (because the enchantment the Forum created still worked at that point).

The two other moments that stuck out for me were much less significant, but still interesting enough that I feel like talking about them.

First, I liked that we completed the character arc for the Loporrits and they warmed up to the people of Etheirys.

Just like so many other characters, they struggled with actually connecting with people, placing duty above actual understanding and support of the people they were supposed to be saving.

They were basically another example of the similar struggles of Fourchenault and Zenos, an example of exploring what healthy human connections should and shouldn't look like.

Finally, I want to bring up what G'raha deduces about Hermes/Amon/Fandaniel.

I love the sort of karmic cycle Hermes is put in as a character. In every era, he has the same struggle. And in every era he finds the same answer.

And yet in every era he also does actually end up having hope.

I think it's part of why he ended up opposing Meteion, and why one of his final wishes before fading away as Zodiark was for you, for humanity, to prove him wrong.

And I love characters with contradictions within them like this.

It's the point he has a job that is so antithetical to his beliefs. And that his mindset and principles keep him from doing his job "right".

His peer review skills are extremely compromised because that is what feelings do.

He treats Meteion just like other ancients do other creations with full awareness of it hurting her, but he still does it.

He's an absolutely fascinating contradictory mess as a character and it is all because he can't see beyond his very specific perspective.

I've gone into it before, but I think it's a super good analogy for how mental illness works because mental illness isn't actually cool, at all.

Nope.

It is miserable for everyone involved.

It is frustrating. It can make people absolutely insufferable.

That's why people often talk the big talk about supporting people with mental illness, but when the time comes and said symptoms actually show up and are "annoying", instead of offering patience, many answer it with prejudice instead.

Many people suffering from mental illness go on horrible paths and it leads to them doing horrible shit because it traps people in a cycle that is really difficult to escape from.

It often becomes an excuse, and when they start doing awful stuff, the victim becomes a criminal.

And many never recover or even just find escape by taking their lives.

And well, treating people suffering like this badly does not actually fix anything, especially not further suffering.

Fandaniel needed to be stopped, but this does not mean he needed further suffering as a reward. It's a case of needing justice that shouldn't become vengence.

Looping back to my general thoughts on Labyrinthos, though, I think 80% of it kind of didn't need to exist.

I really think there could've been much more graceful ways to put the important parts here into the story.

(And part of that grace is not looping one music track over pretty much the entirety of it.)

[necroangelz]

💉 if it's okay :3

I wish to learn more about kin memories & how they work, so I wish to hear yours!! (& maybe if you want, could you explain kin memories please n thank u)

I'm happy to help uu learn more !

heres this neat article i found online that explains what kin memories are (aaand today i learned that there's a fictionkin website WOAH /pos) linkie

tell me if uu want me to explain anything further or summarize the info if uu can't read everything right now ^_^

『 💉 』

a kin memory

along with my kin mems I'll also explain to uu how i got them (⁠｡⁠•̀⁠ᴗ⁠-⁠)⁠✧

( as Hatsune Miku, in a timeline where i was a robot idol )

if uu didnt know: in fictionkin terminology, timeline refers to the past life uu had as that character basically. the word canon can also be used

once, i escaped the studio-compound-apartment where i "lived" (technically it's the location where i was stored by the company that made me) to go on an unauthorized road trip with the other robot idols (vocaloids). i have a LOT of memories about this little event. the first thing i remembered was that i simply snuck out and went on a road trip with kagamine rin and Len. what sparked me to remember this event was seeing this fanart here:

artist unknown, sorry.

it's quite common for kin mems to be sparked by seeing anything related to the character's media, such as fanart.

when i saw this fanart, one could say i felt a strong impression that we went on a road trip, and we were sitting in a car together just like the fanart. at the time i didn't have any sensory memories to go off of, i just innately knew that it happened. (having a lot of mems that are things uu only innately know are fine too! detailed sensory memories aren't necessary to be a valid kin)

eventually i got another memory, can't remember how, and it was mostly visual. (naturally) it looks like a hazy blur when i think about it, but i know what was happening in that memory anyway: it was nighttime and we were at the beach. rin was holding sparklers. there were many of us robot idols there enjoying our night of freedom. i reflected upon the memory further, wrote about it, shared it with some people, and upon further reflection i was able to make it clearer. i got an auditory memory of Rin's laugh and the sound of the sparklers (i also remembered how rin chased me around the beach lol)

last memory I'll discuss: last year i went on a vacation with my family to go swimming somewhere. being in the car with them and the chaos of the trip gave me an impression that robot idols' road trip was also chaotic. after getting that impression i recalled more memories that matched the impression i got (as in, i got memories that were also chaotic)

I'll ramble a bit more about kin memories and my experience with them

i get kin mems through a lot of ways. interacting with content related to the media, like what i mentioned earlier, is one way. there's also listening to music that reminds me of the kin or my past life as the kin (so basically like character playlists lmao) i heard meditation helps people too but I'm trash at meditation so i only tried it like 2 times and it never rlly did anything > <

sometimes mems come to me when I'm not expecting it either. maybe something happens throughout my day, or i just see something, and i recall a kin memory that's similar to what i saw. it's like my brain was "reminded" of the mem

one example of this is when i was outside and i looked up, and the sky was so blue and beautiful, it was a nice day outside, and i remembered playing outside with my friends as sunny omori ^_^

not all memories that one gets will be pleasant. i myself have a few negative memories. if one is distressed by their negative mems, it's absolutely okay, but one must understand that it isn't their life anymore and they have a choice to not dwell on their past life, past mistakes, etc. who they were in a past life does not define them anymore. i used to be very very affected by my negative memories, I'd just be in a slump for multiple days and i won't stop thinking about the mems, but I'm no longer affected by them

so yeah... i hope all of that made sense ahahahahhaa i am not crazy i swear

[jellybuttons]

Honestly I don't understand the tension talking about the movie on here??? We knew it was going to be a seperate, non-canon imagining of the original origin story, and considering the time limit on it and the fact that it's made for new audiences, I think it was a very sweet story that really captured the heart of the original concept that made everyone so wild about the show. It was a different interpretation and it obviously changed a lot because of that, but I don't think some of the reactions I've seen on here are thinking about this the right way.

I've seen a lot of discourse on whether the movie or show was better, and I'm not sure the quality is even comparable. The movie is objectively higher budget and knew it was getting an ending, but it only had about an hour and a half. The show was very much going season by season for a while, and had a much more limited budget and ability to create a continuous story, but also had 5 full seasons to build everything up and help us know the characters and the lore.

I personally loved the movie, because it's what I thought Miraculous was going to be when I finished season 1 in 2016 and I loved that idea. But the show IS Miraculous, and it's given us so much more universe to expand on and so much more character that the movie didn't even touch.

Honestly? As someone who's been here since 2015, with all the hiatuses and uncertainty, how crazy is it that we got 2 DIFFERENT Gabriel arc endings within a month or so? Ladynoir and Adrienette? The chance to see how things would've been different over a different timeline (without a memory erasure)? The movie was a gift, with beautiful animation and music, and I am SO grateful to have that AS A COMPANION to the season 5 ending that handled things so differently. It makes me wonder what the show would've looked like if Jeremy Zag had handled the whole thing. But it doesn't make me love the show less, or be more critical of it than I already would've been.

Like idk about you guys but I loved this movie for the same reason I love the show and a really good fanfic; I'm just so feral about these 2 and their double life and love for each other. Are we really going to sit here and complain about another version of the same love story we've been retelling on AO3 for 8 years now?

This isn't salty, I just want to drive home the point that people have had valid complaints about Miraculous for years, but that at the end of the day it's exciting that we're getting new content with these kids. I think sometimes we fixate on being critical instead of enjoying the same story that captured our hearts so long ago because it was just SUCH a good idea, regardless of how it actually played out. Especially considering this movie isn't canon and has no effect on the ongoing plot of the show, it simply isn't that serious.

This isn't saying you can't dislike the movie. Of course you can dislike the movie. I'm more commenting on the people that are tearing the movie to shreds BECAUSE it's not the show, or who are pitting them against each other. They're different and that's okay. Please feel free to complain about both, because god knows they've given us plenty to complain about over the years, but you can make those complaints while keeping in mind that it's a seperate piece of media than the show that just happens to share characters.

Idk, if it really bothers you that much, just think of the movie as a hella high budget AU origins fanfic and call it a day. But me personally? I'll take every yearning look between these stupid kids that I can get.

[septembersghost]

I want thank you so much for introducing me to Taylor Swift! I didn't use to listen to her songs before (dunno why, sometimes I want to check smth out and then I forget), but you talking about her music so passionately moved me. I've just listened to Midnights and it completely blew me away. Bejeweled feels so empowering, bright and asserive, I straight up cried during Snow On the Beach, because it sounds so delicate and hopeful, a bit melancholic but filled with love and tenderness, like a beacon of light gleaming amidst the darkness. But I think Labyrinth is my favorite track on the album, it's just... All the thoughts I've had, the fears I have, and hearing her speak about this kind of place you find yourself in felt so validating to me. "I'm falling in love, oh no, I'm falling in love again", "You know how scared I am of elevators, never trust it if it rises fast, it can't last" - this line, it gripped me and broke me. The idea that grief, like you said, is a continuous experience, and trauma is something you'll be getting over for years and years, and even if you finally heal and grow as a person, it can still impact your life and happiness, in a way that you can't really trust anything again. If something you loved deceived you, hurt you, shot you in the heart in the past, how can you be sure it won't happen again? How can you open up and love something, someone without being swayed by fear of what happened the last time you loved with this intensity? It's almost like opening your old wounds in a way. Tracing them with a knife. If you're detached, if you're shielding yourself, it can never hurt you as much. But love leaves you vulnerable. Love leaves you open and defenseless. It's like handing somebody a gun and saying: "Here, I trust you." But what if you shouldn't? Then there's also "I thought the plane was goin' down, how'd you turn it right around?" For me it's like: "I've been hurt before and betrayed before, I was wounded and grew a thicker skin, I made myself distant, thinking I could never love anyone this much again, but now you are making me feel things, you're bringing those vibrant colors back into my life and I'm so surprised and startled. I'm falling for you and I'm so afraid to fall for you. Please don't hurt me." I apologize if I'm reading this wrong and projecting my own issues a little too much, and I admit I don't know much at all about Taylor's personal life, so my interpretation is probably entirely false. Still, this song speaks to me on a fundemental level and I find myself here too, I can relate and I really love the way she writes her music. Please never stop talking about the things you love, your passion is so igniting and your blog is truly a beautiful place!!! What are your favorite tracks from Midnights?

YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND, INTRODUCING PEOPLE TO TAYLOR AND KNOWING THEY THEN LOVE HER TOO IS MY FAVORITE THING IN THE WORLD! I READ THIS LIKE:

this message makes me so so soft oh my goodness. thank you for sharing this with me, and for reading all my gushing, emotional, silly little posts because it brings me unending joy to discuss music, especially hers, and the depth of love i have for it.

the fact that you enjoyed midnights fills my heart!!! your descriptions are totally beautiful and fit exactly the themes and emotions she's depicting.

I straight up cried during Snow On the Beach, because it sounds so delicate and hopeful, a bit melancholic but filled with love and tenderness, like a beacon of light gleaming amidst the darkness. like this, that is precisely the story she's telling, i cried hearing it too because the wonder and tenderness of it is so tangible.

i am obsessed with your explanation of labyrinth and the fact that it was your favorite - in the video analysis i watched yesterday, the professor discussing the album said it's his favorite song she's ever written and that it (along with a couple of other moments on the album) brought him to tears with how affecting and accessible and vulnerable it is. it's really cool to hear this from you too. her vocals in the song are incredibly beautiful to me, and the way she expresses her fears, and the swirling anxiety of it, and the almost miraculous amazement of realizing that you're finally held and safe. i love the simplicity of the progression from, "uh-oh, i'm falling in love again, oh no, i'm falling in love again" to the simply breath of, "oh. i'm falling in love again." it says so much in so little.

The idea that grief, like you said, is a continuous experience, and trauma is something you'll be getting over for years and years, and even if you finally heal and grow as a person, it can still impact your life and happiness, in a way that you can't really trust anything again. If something you loved deceived you, hurt you, shot you in the heart in the past, how can you be sure it won't happen again? How can you open up and love something, someone without being swayed by fear of what happened the last time you loved with this intensity? It's almost like opening your old wounds in a way. Tracing them with a knife. If you're detached, if you're shielding yourself, it can never hurt you as much. But love leaves you vulnerable. Love leaves you open and defenseless. It's like handing somebody a gun and saying: "Here, I trust you." But what if you shouldn't? Then there's also "I thought the plane was goin' down, how'd you turn it right around?" For me it's like: "I've been hurt before and betrayed before, I was wounded and grew a thicker skin, I made myself distant, thinking I could never love anyone this much again, but now you are making me feel things, you're bringing those vibrant colors back into my life and I'm so surprised and startled. I'm falling for you and I'm so afraid to fall for you. Please don't hurt me."

i'm just quoting your entire wonderful description because you could not be more right. i'm serious, you're spot-on, this is what she's describing, this is the experience the song is about and i'm touched that it spoke to you like this with such clarity. it underscores not only the impact of her writing and how empathetic it is, but how empathetic and perceptive you are too, and it is a gift to read this. it proves to me how powerfully universal her music is, and that's one of the reasons she's been special to people and been successful for so long. i'm not even articulating myself well here because i'm teary over how this resonated for you. 💗💗💗

I can relate and I really love the way she writes her music. forever mood.

my favorite tracks are...tentatively because the entire album keeps growing and transforming for me the more i listen to it!...snow on the beach, sweet nothing, lavender haze, labyrinth, and you're on your own, kid (or mastermind, they keep competing for me). that's from the standard 13, if we include the extra seven 3AM tracks, it gets even trickier for me to decide! (i truly believe would've, could've, should've and bigger than the whole sky are two of the most profoundly impacting songs she's ever written, i also can barely listen to them despite how lovely they are because they HURT). plus the great war is fantastic and opens up a lot of things, it was brave of her to put quite a lot this forth in such a raw way.

do you want a guide for more of her music to listen to? because i am always thrilled to provide one!!! 😄💖

Please never stop talking about the things you love, your passion is so igniting and your blog is truly a beautiful place!!! 🥺🥰 this is the sweetest and highest compliment, and i'm grateful for it, words like these are always encouraging and stay with me. thank you for sharing your light with me too.

[mochidreambubble]

10, 15, 18, 27 and 40 for Ashe and A), D) and J) for you, if you don't mind :3

asdfghjk the way the ask came pretty fast. tysm for being keen to know more about Ashe ✨TY for all the questions, I enjoyed just rambling on about him 💕(and I do mean I rambled, I think I typed quite a bit much but no one stopped me XD)

10. What lie do they most frequently remember telling? Does it haunt them? Promising Vivian he absolutely would never step one foot into Scarlet Hollow (Ha!). She started needing him to promise when he started having dreams from a young age, and she just knew on sight (well, on the vaguest description) where he was talking about. It was both frustrating for him because it's not like Vivian ever explained why, after all. He was never going to keep that promise, and with Vivian gone and a good excuse to go... Well. No one left to physically stop him. He's going home. It didn't start haunting him until it literally does of course (why would mother warn you for no reason, Ashe).

15. How do they speak? Is what they say usually thought of on the spot, or do they rehearse it in their mind first? I had one line in his initial profile that he prefers to be direct, but he's not necessarily brutally honest. It's a favour he wants both ways, for people to be frank or straightforward with him. He knows people don't start out that way so you can take it as his method of extending the hand first, no hiding behind masks or lies. And no he doesn't think his words through, unfortunately. He absolutely made the The Dead Moms club joke every chance he gets, and that may not have been the best thing to say to Tabby first meeting lol.

18. What embarrasses them? It's the 'I wish I did not do that' type. I also kind of mentioned in his profile write-up, being that he knows people like to look at him because he's textbook Hot. But when he first started as a music streamer, he really did want people to subscribe for the music - even with the understanding that Covers would get more interest than the Original stuff. But that was going almost nowhere so he did the very clickbaity thirst trap route, a lot of things he could never confess to Vivian or anyone actually. Boosted his following enough to make an ok-ish living with an apartment (and a needy bossy AF cat roommate) but now he just can't scrub that part of his history away. Once anything is on the internet it's there forever. He probably doesn't truly want Stella to look him up but it may be too late for that. (on a very hilarious note, his full name is embarrassing to him personally. It's a mouthful and sounds like nonsense) 27. What causes them to feel dread?  Is saying the minute he stepped into Scarlet Hollow a cop-out. Being in the Holler lights his Mystical senses as if he was standing right on a pyre. Sure he's had vague dreams all his life but actually being in the place that had been calling, practically screaming in recent months leading up to his visits... He's 4 days for 4 days on Cassandra premonition on Something Absolutely Insane and People are going to Die or get Hurt (except on Day 4 where no one truly did but a lot of things certainly happened all at once all of a sudden even). Also as of Day 4, our dear Sybil Forsyth. Which internally confuses him because he can swear to himself he sensed no malice but when she stared him down after the whole Kaneeka incident? Something just doesn't sit right with him. (Am I saying he at least genuinely trusted her prior Episode 4? Yes. The over-reliance on his Mystical trait is maybe even a huge potential detriment) 40. How sensitive are they to their own flaws? You can say Tabby hit the nail on the head about him. He needs people to like him and needing that validation maybe does eat at him. He takes being a people person to the extreme sometimes. So you can say he knows he's needy for love and attention and he's aware but he sure as hell as not managed to do anything to change that. It circles back to wanting people to trust him and people he can be equally honest with as well. Also the double edge sword of 'Do people like me only because of my face or actually for me'. Game-wise, it does work out for him in gaining trust at least but he does not know that.

[piratespencil]

satyr and paladin, for the cr asks? c:

Satyr: how did you discover critical role

Oh boy. The short story is: TLoVM got me hooked.

The long story is: My coworker was a CR fan and suggested I get into CR when ExU Prime started. I listened to the first couple eps of ExU as they were coming out, kind of enjoyed it but got really confused about all the references to Exandria stuff that I didn't understand, and dropped off after a couple eps. Then TLoVM came out and that same coworker suggested I watch TLoVM so I did and I loved it, which somehow led me to bingeing all of Narrative Telephone with my roommate, which got me obsessed with the cast. And then I decided, well, there are only like 14 eps of c3 out right now, I could catch up... So I did... And then I was like, well, I have time at work to listen to podcasts... So I think I'll listen to all of c2... And here I am, 111 eps deep into c2 and haven't missed a live ep of c3 since. :) Will I listen to c1 next?? Probably tbh.

(Paladin is on here twice for some reason so I guess I'll do both lol!)

Paladin: what is your favorite friendship

I've talked before about how much I love Veth and Jester's friendship, so I'll go with another favourite and say that Beau and Fjord's friendship is sooooo so good. Just from day one they have such a fun bro dynamic. Fjord coaching Beau on how to be more personable and Beau never taking offense to that. The way they so often turn to each other for validation, the way they're always checking up on each other. Just. They are bros in such a fun way I love them.

(Ohh or Team Cleric!! That's another fave friendship for sure.)

Paladin: what was your favorite badass moment

There are like a million options here but uhhh let's go with a TLoVM moment - the Killbox fight was sooo cool. Highlight of season 2 for sure. The music, the visuals? The narrative importance of Grog calling on his friends in that moment? The cool little bit just before the fight starts where you see Percy and Keyleth and the twins in silhouette on the roofs?? Badass as hell.

(Ask me more Critical Role questions!)

[spainkitty]

Like... I'm watching too many fanvids for jessrory and, my conclusion? Jess was the only boyfriend (hell, one of the few PEOPLE) Rory didn't chameleon herself for.

With Dean, there was that RIDICULOUS Donna Reed episode and, later, she stopped recommending books and music to him, they compromised by both suffering through things the other liked rather than enjoying the same things together. Hell, by the end, they had NOTHING in common unless they forced it.

With Logan, she became the High Society Wife. The DAR member. She bent over backwards and destroyed bridges in an effort to be someone she wasn't. It wasn't just about Logan; he *said* that what she was doing wasn't her. But she did, in the end, do it to be accepted by his family and feel worthy. She was desperate for that validation. (as a gifted kid and a struggling adult, I fucking GET this, and I sympathize a lot more now that I'm older).

Both relationships were destined to fail because she wasn't ever completely herself. Either at the start or at the ending of it, she had to change herself fundamentally to make it work.

Jess, though. With Jess she was so completely herself that Lorelai didn't understand her (because yes, Rory chameleoned for EVERYONE in her life, hi, there's that pedestal). They read books and listened to music and hung out with the band (I love that Jess was actually friends with her friends and THERE SHOULD HAVE BEEN MORE OF THIS) and stayed home watching movies. The rockiest points of their relationship were because of Dean or Lorelai. The constant comparison of Jess to Dean, the constant out of hand judgements of his character by people who didn't even know him, expectations set up for him he had no way of meeting because he is his own person with his own struggles. Yeah, he fucked up and wasn't communicative enough. But he WAS a 17/18 yr old kid with major issues that most of the other characters would never be able to understand(and tbf, Rory was passive and petulant more than once). He shut down and put up walls, he was called a screw up, his accomplishments were diminished, and every adult in his life let him down, yeah, including Luke (and I LOVE Luke, but his support of Jess was conditional in the end. Maybe if Jess hadnt bailed so IMMEDIATELY after that fight, Luke could've/would've calmed down and re-evaluated, but alas). Every time he did something that could be construed as just a little bit wrong, it was blown completely out of proportion.

Rory believed in him, though, and saw the best in him. And he, in turn, saw and listened to her. He questioned her, yeah, but he also didn't LET her chameleon herself. That was kinda the point of his questioning. How much of only herself was in her answer mattered to him. The other variables, the expectations from other people, weren't important: SHE was.

And I think that's why she first ran into Dean's arms, and then later refused to leave Logan. Why she couldn't let herself choose Jess again, even after he'd obviously grown a lot. She had been so completely and utterly bare with Jess, and he hurt her. He kept leaving and he became a stronger, better person without her (in his words, he did do it because of her, but still). Logan and Dean were safe because there were always walls. There was always a facade in the relationship. It took Rory an ENTIRE YEAR to move on from Jess, but every time Logan hurt her, it took her a few weeks, or even just a few days and a drunken night on the floor, to dust herself off and go right back to him. Easily forgiven.

Yeah, let that sink in for a minute. It was easier for her to forgive Logan for cheating on her, with three women he KNEW she was about to be stuck in a room with and he didn't bother to warn her, than it was to forgive Jess for leaving/not calling her. Jess leaving her broke her heart MORE than Logan's massive fuck up. Like. What. the. hell???

IMO: it was because Logan cheated on someone Rory didn't even recognize as herself. But Jess left *Rory* when she had no facade, when she was so much herself that she stood up AGAINST her mother for him. It was a bigger betrayal.

I will go down swinging that Jess was one of the best characters, and the best person for Rory. The only reason they didn't get back together in/before the revival was because ASP was hellbent on mirroring Rory with Lorelai, at the cost of Rory's entire character arc, and Jess and Rory could only be together if she were her own complete person, not her mother's fucking reflection, because that's the person, the Rory, Jess loved.

[killian-whump]

Hi. I know NFTs are bad but I don't understand what they are. I know they are ugly drawings and they are sold at a very high price but that's all I know. You talk about mint and tiers and I'm lost. My request is if maybe you could explain this to me as you'd explain it to a 5 yo kid? I watched a couple of YT videos but I didn't really understand what's this all about. Thank you kindly!

Okay. I'll see if I can manage to do this. The problem is... this stuff is more or less one of those things that is purposely made confusing simply for the purpose of being confusing. It's a form of gatekeeping that governments and corporations around the world utilize all the time. If you keep lay people (ie the people who aren't up on all the unique terms and rules and fine print) from understanding what's going on or how it works, those people won't (a) interfere with what you're doing (b) realize when they're being taken advantage of or (c) take advantage of you or the system you've built.

So yes, this is all VERY confusing. It's meant to be. That's how the people profiting from it WANT it to be.

For the purposes of this explanation, we're going to envision a parking garage. Now, in a normal parking garage, you park your car in any old space you like (they're all essentially the same) and you pay for however long your car sits there. Parking spaces are what's called a fungible good, because there's a whole bunch of them, they're all nearly identical, and one's generally just as good as any other.

Most goods that we buy/sell/trade are fungible. Money itself is fungible, in that one US dollar is equal to and nearly identical to any other US dollar; the same is true for most world currencies.

Now we'll imagine an entirely different kind of parking garage. In THIS garage, we pay our money and a brand new parking space is created for us. There is a sign on the space, visible to everyone everywhere in the world, that states it is OUR parking space. No one else can claim it's theirs; no one else can park their junk in it. It is OUR unique parking space. It isn't interchangeable with any other parking space, because this one is OURS and it's in THIS specific spot and no other parking space can claim those things. It is a non-fungible parking space.

That's essentially all an NFT is. The "blockchain" is a gigantic worldwide parking garage of digital data. "Minting" an NFT is what it's called when someone creates a new parking space in the garage. When you buy an NFT, you're buying a parking space in the garage that will then be yours and yours alone.

Usually, to entice people to buy a parking space in this garage, sellers will put something nice in it first - like a picture or a photograph or an ugly ass ape or maybe a bit of pleasant music. Mind you, you're not buying that item - you're still only buying the parking space it's parked on. The item parked in the space can be changed, removed... or even turn out to be stolen goods that had no business being sold to you at all! Doesn't matter. You bought the parking space, and the parking space is what's yours now.

Now if you're thinking to yourself, "Why the fuck would I want to buy a digital parking space?" Congratulations - You now understand NFTs and can join the majority of the world in thinking they're pretty much useless. Your life will continue as planned.

If, instead, you're thinking, "Well, if it's a UNIQUE parking space and there's none other like it in the world... there's a chance that if I hang onto it long enough or find just the right person who wants my specific parking space, I can make millions!" then congratulations, you ALSO understand NFTs... and a vibrant, adbot-infested community is awaiting your investments. (Please don't buy those fucking apes.)

That said, there ARE people in the NFT scene who sincerely just enjoy the artwork parked in the spaces and feel that buying the spaces themselves is a valid way to support lesser-known artists. They have good intentions, and may be enjoying themselves collecting pieces of art... but they'd seriously be better off just PayPaling the artist $100 and right-clicking to save the images they like onto their hard drive. It would be easier for everyone - and all without the environmental damage NFTs do (that gigantic digital parking garage? Yeah, it uses a metric fuckton of energy every time it makes/moves/stores those parking spaces).

And... That's it! That's all I got. How'd I do?