#and like some people tried to host a panel talk in my house and I had to throw them out and threaten the lil weasle that was apparently

[shazleen]

Boston

[mi6014ikepearson]

RUNNING FOCUS GROUPS - “FIRST HAND RESEARCH STRAIGHT FROM THE SOURCE”

I am a certified “jack of-all-trades: master of none” with my skillset built around my career ambition; being an amateur animator, editor, voice-actor, and composer.

with that jazz, advertising isn’t exactly something that is in my skillset..

but as an avid consumer - I know the things that work on myself, personally

but one person is not enough to harbour an accurate opinion from the general public.. and as such, I decided to stray from my usual methods of researching, to enhance my work for this module by doing some first hand research that brings a healthy dose of perspective from real-world-people into the equation.

IKE ON THE STREETS™ - “DETERMINING PREFERENCE; THE DRINK OF CHOICE”

as a naturally anxious person I find it pretty gosh darn difficult to talk to strangers.. but for the sake of my craft - I wanted to get some perspective, and looking to enhance my project further: I took to the streets, and began asking people for the scoop

I started small, and figured that a higher concentration of the Target Market Audience would be residing at the University campus; so I set up shop, with a lanyard around my neck and asked passers by if they would like to be involved in a short interview.

most people were polite and kindly rejected, others gave their opinion, others were much less kind..

however; after realising I had not received affirmative consent to be recorded in either written or audio format for any of the interviews I conducted that day, I decided to try again the next day - in a different location: the high-streets of Newcastle city centre.

the next day was pretty miserable; with a dark ominous cloud that hung above, pouring rain throughout the day - yet I stood my ground, and attempted to get some interviews, with consent to be recorded so I could actually use the data to further my project.

though, for obvious reasons pedestrian’s attitudes were a lot more hostile; and as such, with only two useable interviews under my belt: I tried again, the next day, as well - hoping for better weather.

with luck on my side, it was grey, as ever - but no rain: though with the hustle and bustle of the city slicks, unwanting to be interrupted from their day to day to answer questions; I was still left with more to be desired.

40 participants is an appropriate number for a quantitative study - and after three days of what I would consider extremely grueling; having only 7 interviews was not looking brilliant..

luckily - a little trick I learnt from student elections, at school, was the importance of bribery offering incentive for people to do what you want.

but with nothing much to offer; I drew up a poster, that I printed out copies of at the university, and spread across any and all pubs that were willing to hang them up in the bathrooms.

i set up the date, and hosted the panel at the City Stadium Park where people arrived just after the scheduled time to a surprisingly successful turn-out.

I had set up a small fold-out table that I dragged from my friend’s house in Heaton, and returned after giving out every bowl of curry.

if this experience has taught me has taught me anything it’s that I should try and pursue a career in the culinary arts if my animation degree doesn’t work out.. and more importantly that when you think that you have nothing to offer, you can always make do with what you’ve got - and somehow things will eventually turn out ok: a sentiment I feel is useful to carry with you, across all walks of life.

IKE OFF THE STREET™ - “COMPILING THE FINDINGS”

in my first few attempts; affectionately named the ‘Ike on the Street Saga’ my questions were very open-ended, and instead relied on the knowledge of the interviewee; as I was attempting to scope out the general public’s reaction to whiskey as a whole.

it is here that I document my findings from this section of my process.

from my research I observed that multiple females explained that they felt the drink was “too masculine” and they felt they weren’t allowed to drink it

I was met multiple times with the explanation that whiskey is an “old-man’s drink”, and a surprisingly high quotation of “my dad drinks whiskey”.

this clear divide between the current generation’s perception of whiskey is something that is so clearly embedded into societal norms that it will be hard to shift, without feeling like a marketing ploy that is attempting to sell people a product..

it seems that people are very split on whiskey; with the majority falling between either “loving it” or “hating it” with very few outliers remaining in the grey about this. I suggest that this comes from the strong nature of the drink.

when asked their personal selection of the top three alcohols in order; the majority of men I interviewed showed a high preference for lagers - followed by shots, and thirdly vodka-mixers

when asked their personal selection of the top three alcohols in order; the majority of women I interviewed showed a high preference for wine - followed by gin, and thirdly shots

both demographics described that the social implications of drinking whiskey did not match their lifestyles - that being the student centric party lifestyle of going out clubbing and to pubs where they felt pressured to drink other forms of alcohol, as these are “especially social situations”.

I assume this comes from a combination of elements:

a desire to not get too drunk, due to the dangers of blacking-out

the perception of whiskey as something depressed old men drink in a bar, rather than the drink of choice amongst friends, on a night out

other forms of alcohol are easier to sip on, over time, in a social situation: compared to a glass of whiskey; which is a smaller volume of liquid.

on the topic of this perception I figured I would address a common complaint that was brought up across the board; being that the pricing of whiskey - notably name-brand scotch was disproportionately high, especially when compared to cheaper forms of alcohol.

I think that when the same or similar products are on offer for lower prices; these will be the ones that sell better to the general public: and as such, due to the laborious and time sensitive brewing processes behind scotch, of all alcohol, I don’t think this price is negotiable enough to be changing anytime soon...

another interesting phenomenon I found was that people who had never actually tried a whiskey were quick to say that they didn’t like the drink.

when asked further about this phenomenon - responses ranged from defensively shutting down by stating that they were unknowing on their own perceptions, stating the drinks strong alcoholic smell puts them off ever taking the plunge, or that ‘(their personal friend) who drinks it gives them the ick’..

what’s interesting about the responses I received is that a negative perception of whiskey drinkers, aside from the usual strong taste, and older demographic, was clouding one’s own judgement

it seems that all forms of negative stigma, despite how minuscule can have interesting effects on people’s perceptions.

with my initial findings drawn from the raw data, I wasn’t satisfied enough - and as such decided to go beyond just compiling my findings, and calling it a day..

instead I streamlined my process and hold further focus groups to ask more direct questions and thus find more useful information to enhance my work.

FOCUS GROUP 1: SECTION A - “A PERSONAL INQUIRY INTO INDIVIDUALS’ EXPERIENCE(S) WITH WHISKEY?”

a rough flowchart that I developed in an attempt to visually showcase the versatile paths I had outlined in preparation for the possible responses that each respondent had 

I began by asking each of the subjects a little about themselves as a person, such as their profession, age, hobbies, etc. all to build up a general rapport with each individual in order to ensure that I had created a comfortable and open dialogue that feels like it goes beyond providing answers to my questions, and instead providing context that I could use to open up a dialogue.

I conducted myself in a proffessional, yet friendly manner - and interviewed a range of candidates from the ages of 19-28, the mean average age from all 47 attendees of what built up the first focus group was 24 (rounded up)

I figured this out using the simple formula:      (the total sum of adding up each person’s age / the total number of people interviewed)

( 27 + 23 + 27 + 22 + 19 + 19 + 23 + 27 + 25 + 22 + 24 + 25 + 20 + 27 + 28 + 21 + 24 + 26 + 19 + 22 + 27 + 19 + 19 + 19 + 24 + 23 + 22 + 28 + 19 + 21 + 27 + 25 + 24 + 20 + 22 + 25 + 22 + 27 + 24 + 24 + 26 + 24 + 25 + 25 + 25 + 25 + 28 = 1109      / 47           = 23.5957446809 )

with the conversations flowing; I began with some direct questioning that forced respondents to give me no-nonsense, straight-to-the-point answers; as well as allowed adequate spacing for them to address their reasoning for said response, without need for a prior prompt.

QUESTION 1:     “HOW MANY DRINKS ON AVERAGE DO YOU CONSUME IN A WEEK?”

rather unsurprisingly the range in which people answered this question varied, immensely - however, a noteworthy trend is the way in which as the subjects grew older they generally averaged out less and less drinking, each week.

the assumption here is that after university there is a substantial lifestyle change; as individuals priorities fall elsewhere in life, there comes less of an interest in the ‘club-scene’.

on top of this, another reason for this trend comes from the idea that hangovers get more and more frequent the older you get - with a lower alcohol tolerance, due to a decreased ability to metabolise alcohol.

this makes it easier to figure out which part of our selected audience range is going to be more effective to target towards; as a higher percentage of the younger Gen Z’s are still experiencing a section of life where drinking heavily is encouraged, socially.

from this - we know that it would be a more effective campaign to research into the analytical trends of search users between the ages of 18-23; and use said data to design a final film that will appeal to our more refined age bracket.

QUESTION 2:      “WHEN, IF EVER, HAVE YOU TRIED WHISKEY?”

this is an important question in that it sets up the foundation for how the rest of the interview will go..      ( referenced to in the above flowchart )

the majority of respondents had at least tried whiskey at some point in their life.

the general consensus was that they tried it at least once, due to a friend of theirs, who drinks it; offering them a sip - however, the results of said sip were incremental in shaping our next question..

QUESTION 3:     “HOW DID YOU FIRST FEEL ABOUT WHISKEY?”

whiskey is a strong drink. and sometimes strong impressions can be too intimidating - so it’s not for everyone.

Tommy Tiernan said it best: describing whiskey as “anger trapped in a glass”, a drink that suits the Irish, and Scots who invented it.

for a few, I interviewed, it was love at first sight - and I well and truly need to emphasise “few”; with only 9 of the 47 participants of my second data pool saying they originally enjoyed whiskey. (19%)

with this in mind, it was only logical to inquire as to if this opinion had changed with the next question..

QUESTION 4:     “HAS THERE BEEN ANY CHANGE IN THE WAY IN WHICH YOU FEEL TOWARDS WHISKEY, AS A DRINK?”

as was to be expected - a strong drink bore strong results; with a substantial majority exclaiming there has been no shift, nor attempt to shift their opinions on the drink..

however, within the small minority of people who did experience a change of heart; I yielded interesting results:

three subjects expressed a substantial positive change in their opinions of whiskey, as they “grew up” implying that with the passage of time, they learned to enjoy the beverage.

on the opposite end of the spectrum; two of the original subjects, who had previously enjoyed whiskey had stated that they fell out favour with the beverage.

QUESTION 5:     “WHY DO YOU FEEL SAID WAY?”

following up, once more - my intention here was to understand the reasoning behind said changes to one’s opinions.

the most prominent theory is that with age comes the ‘refinement of one’s palette’ - with a change in tastebuds and other such sensations due to a complex and confusing combination of neurological, environmental and psychological triggers that can effect the way in which one’s body reacts to sensations.

as we humans grow older we are more prone to experience extreme situations of stress that induce hormone changes, chemical imbalances and other such factors that can effect our general biology, in invisible ways, that slowly reveal themselves over time.

more to be expected, was the two originally positive subjects who told stories of an inability to go near whiskey, after “a bad night or two” where they drank too much, woke up with a nasty hangover, and now associate even the smell of the drink with the nausea they felt the morning after.

QUESTION 6:     “WHAT SORT OF ALCOHOL DO YOU USUALLY CHOOSE TO DRINK?”

across the genders, and all all age groups - beer was ranked most favourably, on average as the go to “drink of choice”, not just amongst my focus group - but a sentiment that is expressed across the world: with beer ranking as the most popular beverage, after water and tea.

determining the most common drink of choice was a key factor in understanding the drinking habits of people in the selected age range.

with the preferable one true “drink of choice” determined; I could look further into the way in which advertising is conducted on an industry scale - going beyond the realms of just scotch/whiskey and dissecting the anatomy of the most successful alcoholic product (beer) and attempt to understand some of the different ways in which the major players in the field tackle selling their product.

QUESTION 7:     “WHAT IS THE REASON FOR YOUR CHOICE, OVER OTHER ALTERNATIVE FORMS OF ALCOHOL CONSUMPTION?”

when asked to justify their choice, 40% of the subjects froze up; confused on what to say, beyond exclaiming it’s just their own preference.

however, it was here, that I was made more aware of the societal expectations and social rules surrounding drinking culture..

QUESTION 8:     “IN WHAT WAYS DOES WHISKEY BOTH APPEAL, AND NOT APPEAL TO YOU, AS A CONSUMER?”

when casually asked the motivations for going on a night out; 80% of my respondents exclaimed that the end goal was to get sloshed, and have a good time.

despite whiskey containing more alcohol than vodka, which has an average alcohol content of about 35% it is a less popular choice for heavy drinking, on nights out; and when I presented this fact to the subjects, I was mostly met with shock, and disbelief.

when mixed with cola; the strong taste of whiskey is masked, and as such it is easier to drink, and thus get drunk off of, and yet it is often side-lined by vodka, due in part to the pre-established norms of alcohol culture.

from my research I deduced that due to its transparency; vodka is often considered to be the purest of the 8 alcohol titans. ( brandy, beer, cider, gin, rum, whiskey, wine, vodka )

the discoloured brown of whiskey is another in a long line of factors that make whiskey feel less refined of a drink; holding it back from its chance to make more of an appearance in common day-to-day drinking culture.

amongst this is a slew of other fairly self-explanatory reasons people gave to justify why they are not attracted to whiskey. I decided there was no need to further explain, here, since these are fairly on the nose in their message and as such I have written out, and compiled the feedback into a comprehensive list, for your viewing comfort.

burning sensation in mouth when drank

strong smell, and taste

higher price than alternative forms of alcohol

served in smaller quantities, so less sippable in social situations

friends and piers do not enjoy, and as such individuals feel “left out” when the only one ordering it

high sugar concentration

too many calories

old man’s drink / “my grandad drinks whiskey”

colouration is unappealing and looks like human micturate

too syrupy

doesn’t mix well with any of the common mixers

too heavy for most social occasions

bottle is too heavy to transport

makes me sleepy zzz

QUESTION 9:     “IS YOUR PRE-CONCEPTION OF WHISKEY ONE THAT CAN BE SHIFTED; AND YOU, AS AN INDIVIDUAL CAN BE CONVINCED TO MAKE THE CHANGE TO DRINKING WHISKEY?”

I decided to end the first section on an optimistic note; hoping to see how susceptible to letting themselves be swayed into shifting their pre-established notions they would be - which yielded an almost perfectly even result with a majority, of 25 people, saying they would not be giving the drink another try - and the remaining 22 all expressing a genuine interest in one-day giving the beverage a go, on certain conditions.

the major issue most people seemed to have was a concern that they would not like it - but be willing to try it if it was on offer, and or became more readily available to them.

as such, I think the brief’s solution rectifies these ails: by creating a smoother blend, that uses a lower alcohol percentage and strong flavour to mask the taste of scotch, as well as offers itself as a cheaper alternative.

FOCUS GROUP 1: SECTION B - “AN INSIGHT INTO THE PERCEPTIONS OF WHISKEY DRINKERS”

I decided to focus the next section of my questioning towards the pre-conceived perceptions people have of whiskey drinkers; and wanted to use some of these ideas as potential design elements that I could wind up using to draw up a character for the final film.

QUESTION 10:    “WHAT PRECONCEIVED-NOTIONS DO YOU HAVE SURROUNDING PEOPLE WHO DRINK WHISKEY?”

the reputation of whiskey drinkers is one that is not favourable to say the least..

with notions suggesting that they are a combination of pompous, posh, pretentious and other such ‘p-words’.

due to the expensive nature of scotch: my respondents most commonly associated it with people who could afford it - citing “old, rich white men in powerful positions”, who celebrate the inflation of their own immense wealth through the consumption of ‘the nectar of the gods’      ( no: not mead )

another common place, that has been repeated multiple times throughout this series of blog posts is that whiskey is an “old-man’s drink” and as such, is not something that the selected audience-base is as inclined to drink.

what I find interesting in the notion that this beverage is seemingly locked behind such factors as race, gender, age, etc. and yet a liquid is considerably one of the most versatile substances in the known universe - as regardless of the shape of its container it will adjust, deform, and contort to whatever format it needs to be, as it’s molecular structure is so weak.

these notions are all in our minds - and yet we speak them as if they are objective truths: this is unique to humans, and as such is too interesting of a phenomenon to not allow to dictate the direction of my project.

QUESTION 11:    “IS THERE ANY REASON THAT YOU, YOURSELF, DO NOT CHOOSE TO DRINK WHISKEY?”

furthering the above issues raised in our previous question; I wanted to take the time to take a more personal approach to the question - and ask the individuals the reasons in which they themselves do not drink whiskey.

the substantial majority of respondents who this applied to cited disliking the taste, and strong alcohol sensation in their mouth.

QUESTION 12:    “ENVISION, FOR ME, THE SORT OF PERSON WHO WOULD DRINK WHISKEY: AND DESCRIBE THEM TO ME, OR USE YOUR PHONE TO BRING UP A PICTURE OF WHAT YOU INTERPRET A ‘WHISKEY DRINKER’ TO LOOK LIKE”

the individual takes on whiskey drinkers fell into three primary categories:

“The Handsome / Refined “Bond” Type

“The Scraggly Old-Timey Western Prospector Type”

and my personal favourite...

“The Tweed-Wearing, Pipe-Smoking, British Countryside Type”

I think with such a range of distinct visual ideas at our disposal this will go a long way in aiding in streamlining the production of designing a character for our final film: and once we have some rough designs, we can more effectively work out the type of film we want to make, as it allows us to flesh out the idea, on the move - which is perfect for a live brief, such as this one.

FOCUS GROUP 1: SECTION C - “BRAND RECOGNITION”

the final section of this tri-ghtmare was asking about brand recognition; and deducing both what brands people have heard of, and would preferably purchase products from.

QUESTION 13:    “WHAT WHISKEY AND OR SCOTCH BRANDS, IF ANY, CAN YOU NAME?”

to a general public, who don’t drink whiskey: the average number of answers across all 47 candidates was two brands - with the majority of people citing “Jack Daniels” and “Jameson’s Irish Whiskey” as the only two brands they associated with the product.

the highest number of brands named was 7 by one particular individual; who went beyond the standard two listed, bringing out Ron Swanson’s signature Lagavulin, Glenfiddich, Laphroaig, Michter's and Woodford Reserve

this knowledge is of course not something that is shared; and I think this is evident that the majority of my interviewees were members of the general public who were not interested in whiskey, and do not enjoy whiskey..

William Lawson’s as a brand is the world's 4th best-selling Scotch whisky with sales of 3.4 million cases in 2021. The brand have the best sales in France, Portugal, Spain and Mexico.

despite these figures: most people in the age bracket I asked had not heard of the brand “William Lawsons” - but it was more known amongst millennials, than Gen_Z: with 3 people recognising the brand name from the millennial age bracket, and only 1 from Gen_Z’s      (and he was 23, so he’s basically a millennial, anyway..)

QUESTION 14:    “DO YOU HAVE ANY PREFERENCE FROM WHICH BRANDS YOU WOULD PURCHASE FROM, IF YOU WERE TO PURCHASE WHISKEY?”

as with most things, people trust the most popular name-brands for the best quality product: and as such, the majority of subjects addressed the only two previously mentioned brands that were consistent between most candidates as the primary two they would trust. amongst them Glenfiddich followed, as the third most popular choice.

these sentiments further the idea that William Lawson’s is a brand that is unbeknown to the general public - and as such; this here advert could be a crucial step in bringing the product to their attention, and potentially gain new buyers.

FOCUS GROUP 2 - “WHAT ANNOYS YOU ABOUT ADVERTISEMENTS”

the second ‘focus group’ I held was much smaller in terms of candidates; and instead comprised of a completely new set of subjects that I had built up through multiple trips between class; with interviews that consisted of using my course-mates, piers, and a slew of on-campus interviews, that I conducted to determine factors that annoy people about ads, as well as the deeper root causes by looking into the psychology behind why humans hate advertisements, in general.

here I document my findings:

THE MORE YOU PUSH, THE MORE LIKELY THEY ARE TO CRACK - “A STRAYING RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN CONSUMER & ADVERTISER”

if you push and push and push - eventually it will have to work.. or will it?

the human mentality is one built upon greed: where we constantly want to consume. this stems from our biological shortcomings; the need to consume a combination food, water, and air, in order to fuel our bodies and continue to stay alive.

within the context of a modernist society this fundamentality is evident through the lifestyles that are commonplace: the average day-to-day human works for a living in an attempt to gain money, that (if any is left) after being used on the bare necessities such as food, health, and shelter; is disposable income to spend on interests, hobbies and general ‘luxury items’ that are not necessities to continue survival.

due to the capitalist structure of the world we live in - having more money is the ideal end goal; as it makes the process of living easier and or more comfortable. due to this - most people are looking for shortcuts in order to get rich, and via the selling of products you are in essence able to accumulate wealth through the transaction of good for consumer’s money;

this is where advertisers come in...

the success behind the advertising business comes from a need for buyers to buy, and sellers to sell; with products needing to be showcased in order to garner potential customers and thus sustain this transactional balance.

however, where there is a potential for business arising - there will always be a swarm of eager sellers looking to make a quick buck, and over-saturating the market by shilling products that do not need to exist;

but due to their marketing as well as our consumerism culture people will still end up buying.

it’s here that my hypothesis arose, as with a now basic understanding of the business model, as well as research into the history of ads; I began to analyse further the reasons in which advertisment, is so annoying and yet despite being so hated is as successful of a business model as it is..

WHAT ANNOYS PEOPLE ABOUT ADS? - “A COMPREHENSIVE LIST”

taking to the general public, once more: with a completely new data-set, I decided to ask a variety of members of Gen Z and Millenials their thoughts on advertising; and compiled a list based off of the responses they gave to express what factors made them dislike ads.

“when something doesn’t look like an ad; but is an ad” / Trickery / Fake skip button

nobody likes to be tricked;  A meta-analysis of some 253 studies of people distinguishing between truth and lies found that people are accurate barely over half (53 percent) of the time. “We rebel when we catch someone in a lie because their behaviour calls into question how accurate we've been in the past, making us feel foolish and incompetent.”

I think this level of deception feels manipulative and as such creates a negative disconnect between the viewer and the advertiser: as it feels they are using underhanded tactics in an attempt to trick the consumer into purchasing their product.

“Fake Tone” / Annoying / Threaten audience

most people are irritated by being told to do things, that they either don’t want to do, or were about to do.

the comparison I was exclaimed most commonly was the phenomenon of individuals going to wash the dishes, at home; and being subsequently told by their mother to wash the dishes. the infuriation stemming from the implication that they were not about to do it, although this differs from the reality - as they were.

within the context of advertising - this is when the ad attempts to be metal telling the audience not to do something: “Don’t skip this ad”.

an extension of this relays to the tone that ads take: described as being “smarmy” and “condescending” - often talking down to the viewers with sentiments like “erm.. you don’t want to skip this ad”, “were you just about to skip this ad..?” and other such phrases.

attempting to call out your audience for their actions again furthers the divide between consumer and advertiser - and as such, is not an idealistic approach.

"Interruption” / having to wait before skipping

with the current state of on-demand services; with restaurant-to-home food delivery, the instantaneous streaming of catalogues of media, etc. consumers are becoming more and more resilient to advertisment; as these days, there is not a need to remain captive to whatever is being broadcasted; as most services now often offer alternatives that are ad-free.

nobody likes being interrupted from their tasks; and as such this is where a level of control is essential in advertising - as it gives the audience the power to skip, scroll past or flat out ignore the ad if they do so choose to.

this illusion of choice is much more powerful of a tool than we would initially give it credit for - as if you remove this; audiences will begin to resent the brand, and thus its products, for harassing them

flawless segue into my next talking point.. 

“Repeatedly receiving the same ad” / targeted ads

years prior, in February of 2015, YouTube began displaying a notorious pre-roll ad featuring Tai Lopez showing off his Lamborghini and bookshelf while promoting his self improvement video program "67 Steps to Wealth, Health, Love, and Happiness".

with viewers finding camaraderie over their shared frustration with constantly receiving this particular advertisment; they would create parodies, and mock the video - with this came a universal widespread knowledge of the creator; that lead to his eventual outing as a scammer, and thus his reputation was forever tarnished amongst the general public.

don’t keep pushing and pushing.

advertising is built on the mentality that if you cram an idea down audience’s throats enough then it will be accepted - however, this is clearly not the case: as in doing so it will feel like harassment of the viewer; and thus, your brand will begin to rank negatively in their opinions.

“Overstimulating” / Bright colours / Loud sound

another interesting complaint I received is that a lot of ads have become, in recent years, far too overstimulating with the amount they attempt to showcase in such a short space of time.

with mobile games, especially, despite being universally enjoyed due to their strange nature, actually receiving one of these ads has been described to me as “one of the single-most infuriating experiences I have ever had the displeasure of experiencing.”

when I inquired further into this mentality, multiple piers expressed that it was due to the unappealing visuals and obnoxious sound design - two factors that will need to be carefully considered how I play with in my approach to this project. 

FINAL THOUGHTS - “YIELDING RESULTS: PROMISING FUTURE”

in order to rectify these ails I also made a list that expresses ideas for successfully creating a not-displeasurable ad viewing experience.

“Easy to spot an ad”

in order to avoid people feeling deceived; be honest about what you’re doing: it’s an ad - and don’t try and be meta, with fake skip buttons, and talking to the viewer behind the screen.

have faith that your product will sell itself: and make an ad that showcases the product, and people might potentially be more inclined to buy it.

beyond that; memorability is a key factor - and as such making something that will stick with people beyond the viewing experience, without being too obscure or out there is the ideal sweet-spot to aim for.

I think something that subtly hints at the product is key; without outright showcasing the product until the end - as it engages the audience to continue viewing in order to find out what is actually being sold to them, as a consumer.

"Quick Content” + “Eye Catching”

slow and steady wins the race no more - the modern-day average person’s attention span has substantially decreased, in recent years: and as such time is valuable.

with adverts, you have the power to control a captive audience for a minimal number of seconds before they get bored and use the instantaneous power of apps like TikTok and YouTube shorts to swipe past your listing - so you need to make those first few seconds count, and open in an interesting way that might make the audience reconsider scrolling past your post, and giving it a watch.

Familiarity!      (Fit everyone’s timeline - ( TMA ) )

though targeted advertising is often felt to be underhanded by consumers; using analytics to ensure you’re hitting the mark you want to is an essential way to maximise your potential consumer-base.

as such, the significance of ensuring your ad is something that will fit everyone’s timeline is a key factor in potential success.

with a well-researched recipe for success now at my disposal; I believe I can use all of my findings to enhance the quality of my final project.

I hope to make something that combines all elements of my research and creates a final outcome that appeals to the TMA using a further dive into the generation’s broader, current interests.

at the moment that looks to be a visually distinct live action, animation blended media piece - that combines satirical comedy and modernist internet humour to create a short, memorable and eye-catching advert, that both satisfies the needs of the brief, as well as appeals to the audience at hand, through its approach.

with that, remember that even the most indestructible materials have a breaking point; and the nicest people can snap, if you continually push them hard enough: so don’t push too hard.

[bishiglomper]

Went to the anime convention. Took the nephew. It was nice. I tried to take him to the dealers room because the first panel I wanted to see wasn't starting right away. but it was too much for him. We made it to one stall. Where i let him pick out 10 stickers. They were being sold in sets of 5 and i had picked out one too. Vendor let me have it for free lol. Nephew did a good job even though it was super congested and loud.

We saw Kel Mitchell. He was great. Seems like a lovely dude. 😋 At some point, someone asked him about his favorite burger joint in Des Moines. (Of course it was Zombie Burger) but after that- as a resident of Marshalltown, IA.. I felt obligated to tell him about The Flying Elbow, who just won Iowa's Best Burger. 😂 I literally live on the same street. It needed to be done. Made me anxious as fuck but I still managed to approach the mic. 😮 So I'm hoping to get The Flying Elbow some bragging rights or something. He said he'd check it out, so we'll see. 😂

Will Friedle was after that. Eric from Boy Meets World. My sister joined us for that one. 😋 I was checking FB during that panel and one of the first things that popped up was my former DM posting about meeting Will. 😂 I was like HEY. Where you at??

Also my cousin was supposed to be there as kid Goku, complete with tail. I didnt see him. He better have been there, man. He promised me pictures. D<

Anyway. After the second panel we had like 20 minutes so we went out for a snack and potty break. Saw some cosplayers. The third panel was 3 My Hero Academia VAs. I dont watch dub, but.. I was still vaguely interested. So was nephew. After 2 hours he was a little restless so he kept popping in and out. But he caught some good stuff, they had him laughing. 😁

The panels got increasingly fuller. Kel had a small group. MHA had almost a full house. 20 minutes to the end I'm like "You know, I bet the dealers room is less crowded now..."

So we went back and lo and behold! It was very roomy. Kiddo was able to bounce around to his heart's content. He delighted a few vendors. He was real interested in some monster figures. The vendor was the creator so he enjoyed telling nephew about them. He wore his batman onesie so people were like "Hey Batman, hows it going"

One guy was like "say 'I'm Batman.'"

He pulled his hood down and in a shy but low gravely voice was like "...I'mbatman" 😂 it was cute.

He got to play with some props. Like a giant infinity gauntlet. He got to demo old school Mario cart. He was super dramatic whenever we passed some risque art. Acting horrified and mortified. 🙄😂 then he picked up a 3D printed skull with wiggly spine.. Like "it looks like mortal combat!" The vendor was all excited and was like you're right! ...but maybe I shouldnt be talking about things like that to a child.. I was like, nah, he's corrupted, you're fine. Pfft 😂

Kiddo was bouncing from booth to booth singing All Star. Another thing that delighted people. He was pointing out cosplayers trying to remember names. There was a group of real nice Star Wars cosplayers.

Apparently he spotted an SCP and YouTuber cosplays. A Loki. Lots of MHA and Demon Slayer. Some Ghost busters.

Mom was broke so I funded the trip with stimulus monies. I only bought a bookmark but I had been hoping for plushies or pins.. 90% was art prints and stickers. 😞 Afterward I bought us dinner. I was a bit too hurty and overestimulated to eat much. Even though it was 5 and hadn't eaten yet. Slowly accumulated a throbbing headache thanks to that. 👀

Oh man. This morning was awful.

I dont know if it was my dinner or because i took my weekly shot last night but i had an IBS flare-up. It took us an hour to leave town and some of that was impromptu potty breaks. Had to run back home for more supplies. We stopped to see our truck at the shop so i could transfer my shit to my bigger backpack.

The farmers market was right across the street, where we saw my anime club host friend. She just started doing tarot readings, pour paintings and those necklaces and earrings that have that half glass marble thing. Only for her would I buy a pair of $15 earrings. 😵 ...but they had cat ears. I asked if she made them because you could see some of the filling leaked around some edges. Apparently she used scraps from her pour paintings, so it kinda looked like resin. 👀

Sissy was saying I should embellish her pendants with wire work. She told my friend about my wire stuff. Apparently its only $10 to rent a booth so i might consider that.. Wouldn't be opposed to a collaboration though. 😋

She was saying she was afraid to do resin because it's messy. I was thinking about taking my resin kit and shit and having a play date to play with it together. A kit is $20, i could get her one and we could experiment. I have a collection of resin additives i could bring. 👀 it is her birthday in a week or so..

Honestly the visit with her was the best part of the day. 😅 I love her. I wanna hang out with her more.

I'm exhausted. I couldn't relax enough to nap though. My butt is sore and bruised from sitting so long, my stomach is killing me, i still have a bit of a headache.. My stupid useless arm hurts to use. Lots of localized pain but. Otherwise I think im doing pretty good? It's gonna be such a long ass week..

Con today. Dinner at aunt's tomorrow. Doctor's appointment tuesday out of town. Again on wednesday, but a 1.5 hr long appointment running a slew of tests. Then I'm gonna try donating blood friday. 😵 thats a lot for me 😭

[eurydicees]

top 10 ouran manga-only arcs

this is going to be such a long post i apologize in advance. the ranking system has absolutely no criteria other than "does this pass my vibe check.” bonus points were awarded if i could think about tamakyo while reading it; points were also awarded every time tamaki did something cool. this was a delight to make. anyways, without further ado, here are my personal top ten favorites, and no i will not be taking criticism.

1. THE TAMAKI EXTRAVAGANZA

(vol 16 chp 73 - vol 18 chp 80)

PLOT:

So much happens here that I couldn’t think of an actual name, and uh does it count as a single arc? Probably not, but I’m counting it as one because it has a single thread: Tamaki. My beloved. So. First, Tamaki finally, finally, finally moves into Suoh mansion #1, but when he gets there, he gets told that he’s only allowed to study the Suoh business and go to school and nothing else— meaning he has to quit the host club. Shizue threatens to out Haruhi as a girl and ruin her reputation— possibly losing her the scholarship— if Tamaki doesn’t break off all ties with her.

The Host Club disbands. Kyoya begins an Investigation™ into Tamaki’s mother— she had been incredibly weak and unhealthy when Tamaki was a child, but when Kyoya met her, she was pretty healthy. After some sleuthing, the hosts minus Tamaki discover that she probably had Bisco Hatori’s fictional version of lupus, which was cured by a mysterious foundation— which they discover was run by the Grantaine family, funded by the Suoh corporation, and actually researched by the Ootori conglomerate. Literally everyone is in on it. It’s fucking wild. Like. Huge “holy fucking shit I need to stop and take a breath” moment.

This information is suddenly released to the public, and then the Suoh corporation all vote Shizue out of her position, saying that she’s no longer fit for the job. She locks herself in her room and refuses to speak to anyone, breaking Tamaki’s heart. But now that she’s no longer top dog, Anne-Sophie can come to Japan— Yuzuru is super hyped and expects Tamaki to be as well, not understanding that Tamaki’s family fantasy includes his grandmother. Tamaki stops going to school and plays piano every day in order to cheer up the house, eventually luring Shizue out to listen to him play their shared favorite songs from J-dramas.

They begin to bond and Shizue sees that he’s not a failure because of his parentage, but it’s too late because Anne-Sophie is about to fly back to France. All is hopeless.

EXCEPT THEN. All of the hosts and all of the clients realize what’s happening and rush to help him get to his mother. They all adore him so much, and give their all into getting Tamaki to the airport. Shizue finally encourages him to go, realizing— with the help of Haruhi— that she has been bitter and selfish and Tamaki deserves better. They rush to the airport, and through a series of shenanigans that are no match for the combined power of the hosts and every single girl at Ouran, Tamaki makes it to the airport. They make it there JUST in time, and Tamaki gets a five minute reunion with his mother. Haruhi finally confesses to Tamaki that she loves him.

WHY I LOVE IT:

oh my God oh my God oh my GOD. Like. This is just. So much. So Much. We all know that I’m like. The #1 Fan of Tamaki Suoh. Like. President, vice president, treasurer, and secretary of the fan club, all at once. I love him so much, and this just gives him so much development. There is so much opportunity for him to grow and you not only really see who he is as a character, but you also see how much he’s grown as a person from his first introduction. You also get more of a glimpse into the world of Rich People, and the way that all of their families interact with each other, and then also with the way that they interact within their families. It’s just such an intense arc and it’s so beautiful and I love it so much.

2. THE SPORTS COMPETITION

(vol 10 chp 46 - vol 11 chp 49)

PLOT:

This one is HARD to rank, because I love it, but it also Hurts. Like. I genuinely cried over this one, though that’s not actually saying much because I cry at everything. So. Here’s what’s up. Tamaki gets into this idea of a sports festival, and then Kuze wanders in to fight Kyoya again, so Tamaki suggests a competition between the two of them. This is a very Tamaki thing to do, but Kyoya gets fed up with it and refuses to participate— until Kuze accuses him of being “Suoh’s pet” and that he’ll always let Tamaki win, and then Kyoya gets fired the fuck up.

But he’s still bitter at Tamaki for starting this, so the two of them stop talking and my heart breaks. This does not stop Tamaki from having heart eyes for Kyoya 24/7. Hikaru and Kaoru are assigned to competing teams, and begin their Very Long Journey into not being so codependent— Hikaru is on the red team with Tamaki, Haruhi, and Kuze; Kaoru is on the white team with Kyoya and Honey.

Essentially, each team goes through rounds of races in different areas that are like. Complete bullshit games, but whatever. It’s Rich People World. The white team gets ahead; the red team performs a scene from a Shakespeare show to rally their losing team together and begins to win, until they’re on even footing. The final race is between Kyoya and Tamaki.

There’s a heartbreaking series of panels of Tamaki just… thinking about Kyoya. I cannot get enough of it. Then there’s an even more heartbreaking series of panels of Kyoya just… thinking about Tamaki. You realize, alongside the other hosts, that Tamaki pushed for this race not really for benefit or fun, but to give Kyoya a chance to compete in something for real, without having to set it up so that Tamaki wins (as we see in the race for the central salon). It’s a chance for him to win and not put his family first. Tamaki still tried his best, because Kyoya would hate him if he threw the race, but he lost because Kyoya fought with the intention of winning for HIMSELF, and not just playing support to Tamaki or impressing his father.

Finally, in the last panel, it’s revealed that the class trip will be to France.

WHY I LOVE IT:

God it burns so good. So Good. The Tamakyo, the Hikaru & Kaoru character growth, the Kyoya development, the Tamaki being so so so good, the Kyoya being so brilliant, everything oh my lord. This is really one of the biggest points of Kyoya’s character development, and it’s the first place I’m going to point to when thinking accurately about who he is as a person. It shows who he is, and who he believes he is, and who he wants to be, and who other people see him as. It’s also just a Tamakyo goldmine, even though they don’t ever actually talk. It’s so beautiful and it makes me cry.

3. THE ORIENTEERING RACE

(vol 14 chp 66 - vol 15 chp 68)

PLOT:

In an attempt to make Tamaki realize that the hosts all love him just as much as he loves them, the hosts sans Tamaki put together an orienteering race. There are six checkpoints, each one with a task to be completed in order to get an ingredient that will make the best meal at the end of the race.

Hikaru and Kaoru play the return of the “Which one is Hikaru?” game, knowing that Tamaki has been able to tell them apart for a while by now; Nekozawa’s checkpoint is a quiz on cursed items, knowing that Tamaki is familiar with Beelzenef; Honey’s checkpoint is a game of whack-a-mole with little mini Usa-chans, knowing that Tamaki isn’t afraid of making him upset over a game, though all the girls are; Mori’s is a sword slicing thing to show that Tamaki will never give up on something; Haruhi’s is a “tell the truth or never pass” kind of thing; and Kyoya’s is a crossword puzzle of all the answers made up of things from previous club themes.

Tamaki pairs up with Konoya— who is in love with him and is the “perfect Haruhi” trope— and realizes that she’s incredibly different from Haruhi, and that he loves Haruhi for who she is and not who he thought he wanted her to be. He also realizes that— because the hosts have gone through all of this for him— they do love him for who he is, no matter what, no matter the bad parts of his personality, and they’re never leaving him.

WHY I LOVE IT:

Look. We know that anything about Tamaki is gonna make me happy. I am a simple woman and so easy to please. This is literally just three chapters about how much all of the hosts love Tamaki and want him to be happy. I cannot express in words how rewarding it is to watch Tamaki realize how important he is and how much he’s loved— because he is loved, he’s so loved, he’s so so so loved. This is also the arc with the building block / building a home metaphor, and it destroyed me both physically and emotionally (vol 14 chp 66). This is where the found family is really solidified, and we all love a good dosage of found family.

4. RACE FOR THE CENTRAL SALON / THE SCHOOL FAIR

(vol 6 chp 22 - vol 6 chp 26)

PLOT:

This is where the anime diverges from the manga, and I have to say that this version of the school fair is just so much better than the anime version. Like. Just So Much Better. Basically, the club is setting up for the school fair, and the best spot to set up— essentially, the spot that will get the most foot traffic form the parents— is in the central salon. To figure out which club is going to get the spot, they all compete in a literal race, both mind games and physical games and it just slaps overall.

The b-plot is that the Host Club is getting threatening letters telling them to drop out of the race, alongside blank papers that are sent with the notes; the hosts have to figure out who is sending the notes and confront it. This is the arc that introduces both Kuze and Yuzuru Suoh for the first time. Kuze is captain of the football team and Kyoya’s rival and also definitely his secret ex-boyfriend. Chairman Suoh is… just. A lot. Just. That’s it. A Lot. He’s A Lot.

Anyways, part of the winning race is capturing this crown that’s hidden on campus, which turns out to be at a swimming pool. The football team gets there at the same time as Haruhi, and Kuze pushes her into the pool and goes for the crown. Kyoya and Tamaki reach her at the same time— Tamaki’s instinct is to go for Haruhi, but Kyoya tells him to get the crown and thus the glory of winning, while Kyoya rescues Haruhi.

Later, it turns out that Yuzuru was sending the blank papers with harmless messages written in invisible ink as a prank to emphasize the literal hate mail that the hosts were getting. The follow up to the race is the actual school fair, where we meet Yoshio and Shizue. Fuck Shizue, not even going to get into that right now because I WILL cry, but just know that it’s even worse than it is in the anime. Yoshio, though, is eons better in the manga than in the anime— he is genuinely proud of Kyoya and says that he actually wouldn’t mind appointing Kyoya as heir.

WHY I LOVE IT:

Volume 6 does SO MUCH for Kyoya and Tamaki and we all know that I’m ride or die for the two of them. Kyoya finally gets a chance to shine as team leader and it’s what he deserves! Tamaki takes a little more of a backseat, which I don’t even mind, because Kyoya does such a good job of pulling attention here. The scene at the swimming pool is just so good— it really shows the huge amount of trust between Tamaki and Kyoya, and does a good job of setting up the relationship they need to have as Rich People, outside of their friendship, which is something that we don’t see a lot of. Overall, it’s a very Kyoya-centric arc, and it does amazing things for the development of his character and personality. It’s one of the biggest insights into how he functions as a kind of mastermind for the club. We also finally get Tamaki’s full-ish backstory, which genuinely makes me cry every time.

5. THE HITACHIIN FAMILY

(vol 10 chp 45 / vol 11 chp 51 - vol 12 chp 53)

PLOT:

So this is technically two plot lines, but I’m going to count it as one because it’s all about the twins, my loves. In vol 10 chp 45, we get a little insight into the life of the Hitachiin family and why the twins are as fucked up as they are. Quick rundown— their parents can tell them apart but pretend not to for whatever godforsaken reason; Kaoru admits he’s in love with Haruhi for the first time and Hikaru remains oblivious; Kaoru begins to realize how unhealthy he and Hikaru’s relationship is and how, one day, they aren’t going to be able to have all of the same things; there’s a cookie metaphor; Tamaki gets lost in the Hitachiin manion; it’s all a good time.

In volumes 11 and 12, we begin the actual split between the twins, where they realize that they can’t stay the way that they are forever. They can’t be one person forever. They realize this in a fight over Haruhi, where Hikaru suggests they “share” her as a sister, and Kaoru rightfully thinks this is bullshit. They get in their first— and only— genuinely real argument. Hikaru breaks down in Mori’s house, Kaoru breaks down at Honey’s place, literally no one is happy and I am crying.

Kaoru asks Haruhi out on a date, and then ends the date by explaining that he could never date her knowing that it would be hurting Hikaru. Haruhi is, understandably, very confused by this whole thing, and no one is telling her anything.

Kaoru then makes up with Hikaru, saying that he’ll give up on trying to pursue Haruhi, but tells him that they actually do need to live separate lives at some point— and that point might as well be now. He wants to break apart entirely, but Hikaru explains that while they need to break apart in a lot of ways and find their own identities, they can never fully forget each other. They agree that they can influence and love each other without depending on each other for a personality.

They keep up the incest ACT at the club, though. Bisco Hatori couldn’t manage to write her way out of that one.

WHY I LOVE IT:

So this one just. Really hits home for me. It’s a genuinely heart wrenching arc, and the progression of the whole thing was just so slow and so steady and it was so well done. The twins are two of my favorite characters in the show/manga, and their relationship is something that I can analyze for days, and this arc is a huge part of why it’s so interesting. It does amazing things for both of them as developing characters, but it does even more amazing things for their character growth as people. It also provides a nice catalyst for the Hikaru/Tamaki/Haruhi love triangle. Anyways, it made me cry and apparently that’s my only criteria.

6. THE FRANCE ARC

(vol 10 chp 46 - vol 12 chp 56)

PLOT:

On the Ouran 2nd year school trip to France, Kyoya decides he’s going to spend the trip searching for Tamaki’s mother, rather than spending it with the other students. He works himself to death trying to find her— he ends up literally falling asleep on the ground because he’s so exhausted from searching and taking literally no breaks. Kyoya finds her eventually, and has a really nice conversation with her— she has a bunch of photos of Tamaki, and clearly is constantly thinking about him. When he gets back to Japan, he tells Tamaki about her— about how beautiful she is, about how she smiles, about how she thinks of her son every day.

We get more of Tamaki’s backstory, and his close relationship from his mother and how his mantra— living life in Japan to the fullest and being as happy as he can be every day— all comes from his mother. She told him that she’s happiest when he’s smiling, and so when he leaves her behind in France, he decides to be smiling every day and make everyone around him smile as well.

While Kyoya is in France, Tamaki stays behind in Japan— he gets closer to his father, who offers to begin to train him to take over the Suoh business. He visits Haruhi, and tells her a little bit about his life in France, and Haruhi’s love for Tamaki begins to make an appearance for the first time.

WHY I LOVE IT:

So I went into this list thinking that this would be my favorite plot, so it’s wild to me that it didn’t even make the top five. It’s kind of weird and I didn’t expect it, but I’m still satisfied with this list. Anyways, I really love this one, even if it’s not the top five. It’s like. The ultimate Tamakyo story, and there’s just. There’s just so much to unpack there. Like. We don’t have time for me to go through the whole thing and analyze every part of it because there’s just so much of it. It’s so good, and it makes my heart grow three sizes. It’s another brilliant development piece for Kyoya, and shows his softer side, as well as just how much he loves Tamaki.

7. MORI AND HONEY GRADUATE

(vol 15 chp 71 - vol 16 chp 72)

PLOT:

Honey and Mori announce that, after graduation, they’ll be splitting up and going to different universities. This proceeds to emotionally destroy literally everyone except for them. Mori is challenged to a series of duels at the Kendo club in which he has to fight every underclassman who wants the honor of fighting him before he graduates. He’s exhausted and worn down, and he loses to a second year, which is bad for like. Honor reasons. RIP. Anyways. He reveals that he’s just been really worried about something but before he can tell anyone, he has to duel Honey. It hurts.

They start preparing for the fight— which Kyoya is capitalizing off of via movie rights and betting rings— and scare everyone that they’re going to never speak again. When the fight comes, they fight on the Windswept Hill™ at Ouran (the same place that Chika and Honey fight on way back when). They go for it and pull no punches, until Honey tries to do a flying kick and Mori catches him and gently places him outside of the boundaries of the fighting ring, thus winning the duel.

Because he won, he pulls out a sheet of paper in which he’s written down all of the things that Honey needs to do in university because Mori isn’t going to be there to take care of him: brush his teeth, cut down the cake by 90%, and stop bringing Usa-chan to classes. Mori felt that he didn’t have the right to tell him these things until they were on equal level because he had won the duel.

They make up and everything is okay— they graduate, everyone cries, including me. Kasanoda gives Mori flowers, it’s all very cute. Haruhi makes cookies, and when Tamaki goes running down the hallway to find her, they bump into each other and drop all of the cookies. While they’re picking them up, they share the classic ~accidental kiss~.

WHY I LOVE IT:

This is one of the only Honey & Mori-centric plotlines that gets fully fleshed out and like. More than a chapter. It really does lovely things for their relationship, and it’s the end of an era. Even though it’s the end of an era, though, the resolution is incredibly satisfying— Honey and Mori’s stories are wrapping up, but it’s really well done. It’s sad, but it’s a really rewarding ending. They’re such sweet boys. Also, it’s not like they’re gone forever, so it’s all okay.

8. REIKO x HONEY

(vol 10 chp 41)

PLOT:

Reiko is part of the Black Magic Club, and falls in love with Honey when he gives her a hand in getting up after she trips over Usa-chan. However, she believes that falling in love with Honey is equivalent to him “stealing her soul,” and so she uses “curses” to steal his soul back. These curses are basically just love spells. 

In the end, Honey tells her to just, like, be herself. Talk about her interests. Get to know him. Be honest. Then she won’t need love spells to make him like her. Even if she messes up or is awkward or says something weird, he’ll still like her because she’s being true to herself. This is one of the only Honey-centric chapters, and Reiko is one of my favorite side characters.

WHY I LOVE IT:

They’re the OG goth x pastel couple. The blueprint for all other couples. Icons. I love them so much. This makes it on the list just because I love their relationships. I also love the whole Moral Of The Story, in that it’s important to be true to yourself. It’s so sweet it hurts.

9. HARUHI AND TAMAKI’S FIRST DATE

(vol 18 chp 81 - vol 18 chp 82)

PLOT:

So. Right after the two of them confess their love to each other, everyone expects them to get together and be a couple right away, but Haruhi is just kinda chilling. She’s not super stressed about dating, it’s just a relief to have said it out loud. Meanwhile, Tamaki is kind of a mess, stressing out over their first date and trying to make it as perfect as he possibly can. Seeing him so stressed, all of the hosts band together to help him out in planning a date. When Tamaki finally gets up the nerve to ask her out, he falls in the fountain and Haruhi has to fish him out. She’s then the one to ask him out to the amusement park.

In true Tamaki fashion, he gets incredibly stressed out again. He gets fashion advice from a series of unfashionable people. The hosts sneak around the amusement park and follow them around, finding out that it’s actually going really well, as long as they’re not interfering. After the Lobelia girls show up and try to sabotage the date, Tamaki and Haruhi run away— while Kyoya Handles™ the situation— and they go to her mother’s grave. There, it’s revealed that Haruhi will be going on an exchange program to America.

WHY I LOVE IT:

It’s just. So cute. Like. I’m Tamakyo for life, but I do adore them so much. It’s lower on the list because of the sheer amount of second hand embarrassment, but overall, I loved reading this one. Tamaki is just so genuine and earnest about everything he does, and I think these chapters do a lot to show why the two of them work as a couple. It also does lovely characterization points for Haruhi, and begins to wrap up the ending. Bonus points for a jealous and heartbroken Kyoya.

10. PRINCESS MICHELLE

(vol 9 chp 38 - vol 9 chp 39)

PLOT:

Princess Michelle comes to Ouran to do a week of school in Japan. After meeting her, Tamaki essentially puts him and the Host Club at her beck and call, doing anything that he can to make her happy, no matter how insanely extravagant her demands are. Everyone else finds this infuriating, until Kyoya points out that Michelle looks similar to Tamaki’s mother, saying that the last time Tamaki saw his mother, she was crying— and if he sees Michelle smile for real, it might help him picture his mother smiling again.

Overall, it’s just a very soft arc that begins to unfold Tamaki’s family-related trauma. It also kickstarts Tamaki’s realization that he’s in love with Haruhi and doesn’t actually have paternal feelings for her (that’s the whole next chapter, but make it funny rather than introspective); and it’s one of the moments that Haruhi realizes that Tamaki is genuinely just a good person.

WHY I LOVE IT:

I wasn’t sure that this one would make the list at all, but I do really love this story. It’s pretty short, just two chapters, but it’s overall really sweet. I like Michelle as a character a lot— she seems a bit like a bitch at the beginning, but she gets fleshed out and given an actual personality as the chapter goes on. It’s a really good example of Bisco Hatori’s writing.

HONORARY MENTIONS:

Mei (character): probably the most significant character in the manga that doesn’t appear at all in the anime, which is pretty tragic, but I think that the anime really wanted to emphasize that Haruhi doesn’t really have any female friends / friends outside of the hosts. But anyways, she’s Misuzu’s daughter and Haruhi’s friend; she’s lowkey transphobic but she’s getting better! Had a brief crush on Tamaki but she ends with being the #1 Tamaharu stan. Great friend to Haruhi.

The masquerade ball: Haruhi's going away party, and the reveal that she's a girl.

Haruhi gets kidnapped: Haruhi is kidnapped and held for ransom, the hosts find her and break down doors to get there.

[naturalflowofthings]

Story time again

The JIB8 J2M airbnb story is full of holes and incoherence. But this analysis and the pictures of the supposed house put together somehow filled the blanks for me and it became one of those OMG moments with chills down my spine. It became clear as day that Misha and Jensen shared a bed. It very well could have been just a platonic practical arrangement which, while telling the story, got Jensen panicking “what if people think we had sex in that bed” and he tried to change the story so that he was in a different room… and failed. Then of course that made people think that if he is so eager to hide something, it has to mean they had sex… Poor Jensen.

But I like to think of it as a Cockles story. Here it is.

*****************************************

They were supposed to tell an innocent funny story of three friends spending time in a rental house. Somehow the story got weird and Jensen realizes it was pretty much his own fault. Sometimes when he's worried about revealing too much, he ends up saying terribly revealing things... like Freudian slips. Why did he bring up the bedroom situation? As if they would rent a house without knowing how many bedrooms there were? The audience didn’t know that there were only two bedrooms and that the big bedroom had one king size bed and the small bedroom bunk beds for kids. The audience didn’t suspect (yet) that it was supposed to be a romantic getaway. So talking about the bedrooms was unnecessary. Now that he thinks of it, Jared started the story just fine. A big house Misha rented and where they all stayed. Then they could have skipped the awkward sleeping arrangements part of the story altogether and just tell about Jared's shenanigans in the morning. But yeah, it ended up being a weird mess of a made up version of how it all went. Oh well. Not the first time they have given the shippers something to fuss about. (Or the last; the very next day Nesnej took over his panel with Misha with the underbear spectacle.)

But the memory of staying in that beautiful rental house is precious for Jensen although the memory of talking about it isn’t so much. He and Misha decided to rent a house near the set not just for convenience but also to stay there over the weekend after shooting. The house was amazing. The mountain view from the terrace was breathtaking but the bedroom was even more so. It was huge and it had a tub in the middle. When they saw the pictures they realized that that’s where they would spend most of their time in.

On their first day they would arrive at the house after the midnight so they needed to get the keys before shooting. Jensen offered to meet the host of the house early in the morning and throw their bags in and at the same time play some golf at a nearby course. There wouldn’t be a chance for that later. Misha doesn't play golf and they had other plans for their stay. When he met Misha at the set in the afternoon he was so happy to tell him the house was everything they had hoped and more.

During the long day of shooting they realized that Jared was not feeling well so they invited him to stay with them for the night. They couldn’t let him drive home alone. Jensen and Misha would have plenty of time just for themselves later. They figured Jared could stay in the spare bedroom. Of course when they arrived at the house they realized that Jared wouldn’t comfortably fit in the ridiculous bunk beds. Jensen and Misha tried not to laugh when Jared tried to cram himself in one of the beds. Jared wasn’t on a joking mood. They made a very nice bed for him on the floor next to the bunk beds with all of four mattresses. And very soon, after just one glass on wine Jared fell half dead on the mattresses and started shaking the house with his snoring. Jensen and Misha heard the snoring in their beautiful master bed room but it didn’t really bother them. They stayed up and enjoyed some more wine, the bathtub and each other for quite some time.

Jared was the first one up the next morning. He felt better. You could tell that from the childish goofing-around energy he suddenly had. It probably absorbed from the kiddie bedroom during the night. Jensen and Misha were now tired. Jensen was just getting up when the phone rang. Jared answered it without thinking. And for a moment he talked like someone actually meant to call him. Maybe someone from the set? It was sort of too late when Misha realized that Jared was messing around and the call wasn’t for him/them. Some wrestling and yelling and glass breaking ensued. That whole thing was good wake up entertainment for Jensen. Later Jared said that at first he really did think it was for him because the caller asked for Jared. When he realized it was another Jared (the host of the house) he just decided to go on pretending to be the assumed Jared. Who does that? Well, Jared does. When they told the story at the panel Jared wanted everyone to think it was a prank all along. Saying that the owner’s name was Virgil took out that aspect of his momentary honest confusion.

While Jensen and Misha were in the shower, Jared ended up watching gay porn with some steamy shower sex (which of course Jared found extremely hilarious given the situation). Because he was bored (and Jared), he started fiddling with the remote control and just happened to make a yearly subscription for the porn channel. For no reason. Just to see if he could. After the shower (sex) and the argument Misha and Jared got into about the subscription, those two actually sat down and watched the gay porn, now that it was payed for. That was a bit too much for Jensen, and he stayed in another room and read a book while waiting for Cliff. Still, it felt nice that they had that level of comfortable normalcy about it all. His brother Jared and his lover Misha. 

Jensen loves going back to that house in his mind. He even loves the idea of people maybe guessing what it all was about. But what he loves most is that there is the most intimate thing no-one will never know about. Not even Danneel or Vicky. It’s just theirs, his and Misha’s. The pure bliss that was witnessed only by the misty mountains. 

The messed up story at the panel actually emphasized that it's him that is the most not normal about it all still. Afterwards they had a long discussion with Misha about what he is so afraid of. Jensen isn't sure what it is. He just knows that he is not there yet, maybe never will be. Misha understands. He always does.

[imagine-that-one-thing]

Her Majesty. || 20

Cruella

Anastasia.

The palace halls' are bustling just like my thoughts are overflowing and seizing to stop. I haven't spoken to or seen Harry since we fell asleep last night. Everything was great until it wasn't.

It is partially my fault for what occurred last night. I shouldn't have glanced at his desk and picked up the file, his work is his business, and I had no right to look. I was intrigued. I didn't anticipate recovering photos of what transpired the night my father died, and I didn't expect all the emotions to boil over and cause me to break.

I walk to the stables, the last resort of attempting to attain Harry. When I woke up this morning, I had hoped he would be close by. He habitually tries to linger when he knows I need to be awake at certain times, but I received no greeting this morning. No text, no call, nothing.

I mindfully lead down the hill; strands of thin light come from the sky, springing in between the cloudy May morning. The malachite-green fields appear covered in a bright sheen under the morning rays. The sparkling morning dew is making itself present as I slide on the soggy grass, almost sliding down to a host of daisies dispersed at the bottom.

I find myself safe and sound at the bottom of the hill and in the presence of the horse stables. I discover Harry standing at the fence, leaning his arms on the top panel as he watches a few of the horses being moved around by trainers. Harry glances over his shoulder and sees me but diverts his attention back to the horses. My breath hitches in my throat as I inch closer, I had assumed our issue from last night had subsided, but from the look on his face, I was wrong.

"Been looking all over for you," I break the silence as I stand beside him.

Harry proceeds to stare at the horses, intently observing them. I can only presume he is out here for some fresh air and to clear his head for a few moments before going back to work. "Been here," Harry responds.

"Are we okay?"

Harry breaks his stare from the animals and cocks his head to the side to glance at me. Then, Harry takes a deep breath and nods, "Your horse is doing well," Harry gestures to Meadow as she leads with the trainer.

"Yes," I agree, "Why are you out here?"

"I am watching the horses."

"Why?" I press.

"See the horse on the left?" Harry questions, and I nod my head, "She's going to be racing with yours. They're both good contenders for the Ascot."

"Where did she come from? Mum's horse is grey."

"She's mine… Well, she is ours," Harry responds, "Been watching her train for the last six months."

"When did you have time to buy another horse?" I cross my arms over my chest. I don't know half the shit Harry does, but I am not surprised by him having another horse.

Harry shrugs his shoulders, "Well, the man next to Mum started training her, but he couldn't do it alone. He asked if I would help, and I couldn't, so he brought her down here. Your Mum said she could stay in the stables."

I raise a brow, "Okay… We can discuss the horse thing later, but why are you bouncing around my question on why you are out here? You don't hide out here. I have been looking for you for an hour."

"You know how you need alone time? So do I. You should go inside and get your cuts cleaned up properly," Harry gestures back towards the Palace.

"I am fine," I mutter, "What is wrong, Harry?"

Harry sighs and bends down, picking up a black file from beside his feet and handing it to me, "You want us to be an open book; here it is. I don't want you snooping through the office, I have nothing to hide, but there are sensitive things in that office that you do not need to see." Harry begins as I take the file from his hands, "This file… I am hesitant to give it to you, but if it stops us from arguing, so be it. This is information and pictures of all the suspects that could be linked to your father's murder. Matthew and I have been working with an undercover cop that Parliament hasn't paid off to keep quiet. I have a private detective working with us as well. Every person in this file are suspects and people to be wary of."

"Why are you—"

Harry cuts me off, "I don't want you arguing with me over it. That is why I am showing you. These people are all dangerous. I know what to look for when I am out. I can protect myself and don't need protecting. Matthew has enough faith in me to know I don't need security at all hours. I am safe, Anna. But you need to be aware of these people. Remember their faces in case they come around."

"Just because you can look after yourself, it doesn't mean something can't happen."

"I am trained to do what I do; I am qualified to deal with situations. Let me worry about safety, and you worry about governing the monarch. I am not trying to be condescending, but I don't want to fight with you over my safety. I also don't want you finding things you don't need to see."

"I didn't mean to find what I found. And I don't want to argue; I am just worried about you."

"I know," Harry nods, his eyes ultimately softening, "I am fine, Anastasia, Matthew and I know what we are doing. You wanted us to uncover who did this, and we are. You need to let me do my job as security personnel, and you need to let me do what needs to be done."

I become withdrawn and open the file, my eyes momentarily skimming the photos and the information written under each image. No surprise, half of these members are part of Parliament. "I am working on proving they are immoral. Your mother and I are coming up with a plan."

"My mother is in on this?"

Harry nods, "Yes, sweetheart."

"You're not a detective or an assassin, and you can't do this."

"I promised you I would find who did this. We know what we are doing. Can we please leave this conversation alone now?"

I hand Harry the file back and clear my throat, deciding that sometimes what I do not know will not hurt me. I understand where Harry is coming from. "So, you have another horse in Ascot? How rich are you?" I chuckle.

"Not very," Harry responds. "Speaking of money though," Harry begins, "There is a house up for sale in the countryside. Would you like to take a look at it? It would be a good escape for you, so you aren't always on royal grounds."

"I haven't even looked at the Duchy of Lancaster. I have no clue what is in that trust that I have now inherited."

I have no clue how the trusts work. My father took care of everything, making sure I had everything I needed. Now, I have no clue how much money is sitting in my name or what to do with it.

I know there is land, estates, and God knows what at my disposal. My father never prepared me for financial things; he prepared me for hosting banquets and talking to world leaders.

"Baby, I didn't ask if you would pay. I asked if you wanted to look at it and discuss it."

"We can," I agree, "But I don't want our homes to be a part of the royal estates or trusts."

"As you wish," Harry nods, "I will send you what I found. Look for something you want. I am going back to work." Harry steps away from the fence, beginning to walk away from me.

"Harry," I call his name, and he turns around to look at me, "Are you sure we are okay?"

Harry nods his head and steps closer to me, "Yes. I am going to work. I love you. But before I go," Harry leans closer, "There's a hidden trust; you might want to find it." Finally, Harry whispers before he kisses my cheek and shuffles away, leaving me alone near the stables.

As much as he says we are okay, there's a horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach. No matter what, I am not going to like the idea of Harry and Matthew doing what they are doing. When I was in an emotional rage, of course, I wanted them to avenge my father's murderer, but not I want them both safe. I know they are knowledgeable and highly trained men, but I don't want the wrong person to find out what they are doing and turn the tables. Likewise, I don't want Harry getting caught up in anything more than what he already has.

♛ ♛ ♛

With Harry being tied to me, he is at a greater risk than he was beforehand. I don't think he quite understands, but I need to trust that he knows what he is doing.

I convene at my desk, carrying on my day of signing documents, writing letters, organising the royal tour with my assistant and doing my best to come up with ideas for the charities I represent.

On top of everything, I also have the task of discovering more about the armed forces. As the Queen, I can declare war and peace under the Royal Prerogatives, meaning I must stay updated with all foreign affairs. This type of pressure is something I do not want. If there is anything, my father was best at understanding his troops and knowing what to do in every situation. My father may not have been the most beneficial at opening charity events or attaining the right charities to represent. Still, his military was at the top of his priority list. I can only assume his devotion is due to him being a military member himself.

My father served in the forces before I was born. I must continue his work and devotion to the troops, not just as Queen but also as his daughter. With each day that crosses, the list of things I need to tend to is getting more comprehensive, adding pressure to my shoulders. I am drowning in the depths of the royal monarchy.

I glance towards Estelle and hit my pen on the paper in front of me, "Estelle," I distract her from the letters she is sorting through, "Will you get me the report of the day's parliamentary proceedings and find me someone who knows something about the military... Who helped my father?"

"Your Majesty, Prince Louis was the one who helped him the most."

"Great, tell him I want him in my office, please," I smile towards her, "I don't care if he is busy with Madeleine."

Estelle chuckles and nods her head, "I will, and I will get you the report," she responds, standing from her position and marching out of my office, leaving me alone for the first time today.

I take a moment to adjust my task from royal duties to hunting for a property that will not be associated with the royal family-- something that will be mine and Harry's. I explore the internet, unsure of what I am looking for. All I genuinely recognise is I want something homey, something that isn't just four walls and a roof, something that will be a nice escape from a life that I have never wanted. I want a small, cosy place where I won't have to worry whether staff will be watching or if the security cameras are on. I want something ordinary, maybe something with a vegetable patch or a small garden for me to look after. I don't want anything substantial.

"Ah, Anna, my darling friend," Louis enters my office with his arms spread out with an extensive grin across his face, "This better be good because I was-- Well, nevermind what I was doing," Louis trails off with a shit-eating grin, prompting me to shake my head.

"I don't even want to know, Louis," I screw my nose up at the possible thoughts of what he was up to. "I need some help."

"You're beyond help."

"Oi," I laugh, "If I wanted a smartass, I would have summoned Harry."

Louis nods his head, "I would say he is more of the prick than a smartass," Louis laughs, "He is a prick but also a standup guy."

"I didn't call you in here to discuss Harry. I need some help with this military stuff," I gesture towards the paperwork on my desk, "I don't know the first thing about this. You were my Dad's second hand."

Louis moans and slumps down in the chair beside me, "That is privileged information, and so is whatever I tell you, so what is in it for me?" Louis questions, holding the papers in his hands and flicking through them.

"Well," I begin, "I will let you continue staying at the Palace rent-free while you screw my other friend," I respond with a smirk, "And I will keep your secrets about what you do in the rooms that you are not meant to be in."

Louis stares at me with his lips wide apart, "Yeah, my husband is second in commands with security, and he watches the cameras. So he views every dirty thing you have done between events."

"Bloody Harry," Louis shakes his head, "Okay, well, since the cat is out of the bag, I shall help," Louis accepts, taking my laptop and commencing to take control over the word document, typing away and explaining as he goes. "Before I get too deep into this, who else knows about the shenanigans I have done?"

"Just Harry, he turns the camera's off to shield your dignity."

Louis shrugs his shoulders, "Hm, good man," Louis nods, "So, I-"

I cut him off, "So you should continue to help me unless you want Harry to stop hiding your sex tapes."

"Ouch, that is so dirty. They're not sex tapes, Anastasia. I was hoping you wouldn't act like I haven't seen you and Harry sneak off."

"So, the military," I change the subject, gesturing towards my laptop, "You type and explain," I command, not wanting to address private matters any further, he may be my best guy friend, but we do not discuss these things when the Palace staff can hear us.

I glance up from the desk and recognise Pippa waltzing in with papers in her hands. Pippa grants me a smile and stares towards Louis, "What are you doing here?"

"Nice to see you too, Cruella de Vil," Louis mutters.

Pippa places the papers in her hand on my desk, not breaking her gaze from Prince Louis, "The thing is, I was born brilliant, born bad, and a little bit mad. I'm Cruella. So don't piss me off." She recites a line from the real Cruella.

"Oh, you bring shivers to my spine; how will I ever sleep at night?" Louis leans back in his chair, amused by the banter.

"On a bed of nails with any luck," Pippa mutters, "I need you to sign these," Pippa pushes the papers towards me, "Parliament needs to be opened."

I nod my head and bring the papers closer to me, and Louis takes them from me, "So, do you plan to let me be reinstated in Parliament or are you still banishing me?" Louis questions, taking me by surprise.

When was Louis part of Parliament to begin with?

"Louis, darling, you're not fit to be in Parliament. We have been through this."

"No," Louis shakes his head, "You have been through this. I suggest you let me in."

"And I suggest that you sit down. Little boys should be seen and not heard."

"Pippa," I scold, "He is still a Prince. You will show respect," I inform Pippa, reminding her of her position. Pippa may be prime minister, but she still has an obligation to respect all royal members. "I will open parliament when I am ready."

"Anna, I don't need to remind you of the symbolism of the unity of Parliament's three parts."

I heavily groan and nod my head, "Yes, the Sovereign, the House of Lords and the House of Commons. I know, I am not a moron, as I said, I will open it when I am ready, Pippa."

"I suggest you make a wise decision and open it sooner rather than later."

"Pippa," I begin, "I will force the dissolution of Parliament through a refusal of royal assent if you don't leave me alone." I threaten her, not wanting to open Parliament until I know what I want to do. I do not wish to open Parliament with the members I currently have.

"You cannot do that alone," Pippa shakes her head, "So, sign and open."

Harry descends into the room, and I perceive him wander closer, his eyes staring at Pippa from behind as I begin to speak, "Pippa, all due respect, but I will do it when I am ready."

Pippa has no desire to take my word.

Louis clears his throat, "Cruella, she has told you she will do it when she is ready."

"Better men have called me worse things," Pippa returns bitterly.

"I doubt that they were better men," Harry interrupts the small feud that is happening in my office, "Now, I suggest you curtsey to the Queen and walk out." Harry advances forward as Pippa turns around to observe him. "Don't look at me like that. Your stare doesn't scare me."

"It ought to."

"It doesn't," Harry responds, "Now, get out. I want to speak to my wife."

"Your wife is busy."

"Pippa," Harry settles himself, taking a breath and closing his eyes for a brief moment, "Sometimes dead is better, you know a little something about that, don't you?" Then, Harry questions, "Now, if you don't get out, you will find yourself with Henry."

"Is that a threat, Harry?"

Harry shakes his head, "No, merely a comment, now walk," Harry points towards the door.

Pippa doesn't speak, and she keeps her lips tight as she half curtseys to me and begins to make her way to the door.

"Oh, so him she listens to," Louis mutters, crossing his arms over his chest.

Pippa glances over her shoulder, "He has the power to kill me, and he's better looking," Pippa responds, waving her hand and walking out of my office.

I stare at Louis and Harry before I shake my head, unsure of what just happened in my office. "Harry, my best pal." Louis grins, his cheery tone not working magic on Harry.

"What do you want?" Harry sighs, walking around the desk and coming towards me, leaving a kiss to the top of my head before he leans on my desk.

"Pippa seems to be scared of you, and I want to be back in parliament, make it happen."

Harry shakes his head, "I can't, I have no power over Parliament if I did… Well," Harry pauses, "Nevermind, I won't finish my sentence."

Louis pauses for a moment, looking towards me for help, but I don't intervene. I had no clue Louis wanted to be a part of political matters. "You're King, and you have just as much power as Anna."

"Sure, Louis, run in parliament, I don't give a damn," Harry responds, his tone of voice coming across as agitated.

"You're a bit hostile," I point out, regarding Harry's tone of voice and the way his mood hasn't changed since Pippa marched out. "What has you all rattled?"

"Is he not always hostile?" Louis chuckles, causing Harry to break a small smile.

Finally.

"I am," Harry nods, "I don't feel the best, and Pippa irks my nerves. Can we please get rid of her?"

Louis looks back down at the paperwork Pippa wants me to sign, "Since you have the means to kill her, why don't you? Do us all a favour."

"Oi," I interrupt the two men, "That is not how we speak around here. We do not condone murder. We have had enough murder."

"We can discuss a plan later," Louis shakes his head. "When she isn't around," Louis gestures towards me.

"Mhm," Harry hums, "You were so sweet when I first met you. So what the fuck happened?"

"He hung out with you," I murmur while Harry moves a few things around on my desk, purposely making sure they are not in their proper position. I don't know why Harry enjoys rearranging my desk.

"Anyway," Harry begins, "I came here to tell you that it isn't a good idea to open Parliament right now. I would recommend you don't listen to Pippa."… "With that being said, I am going to go lay down before I have to escort your mother through the tunnels."

"What do you know?" I instantly ask.

Harry shrugs, "She wants it open to try and gain more control. Goodbye, Louis. Goodbye, darling," Harry kisses my cheek before stepping away from my desk, not giving me much more detail to work with.

I wake up to a refreshing breeze tapping my skin that the soft sheets haven't covered.

When I finished my impromptu meeting with Louis, Harry wasn't back home; he was still on my mother's service. I am not sure where they went or what they were doing— all I know is that when Harry came home, he collapsed to the bed and fell asleep, barely managing to mumble a Goodnight to me.

I stretch my arm over to Harry's side, surprised when I notice it empty. I sit up in the bed and glance around, my eyes settling on the white balcony curtains whirling with the inadequate breeze. I get out of bed and follow the draft. My hand pushes the sheer white curtains to the side, and I step out on the balcony.

The early morning air is a little crisp for my liking, but it's soothing. The breeze drifts through my hair, the summery feeling still evident as another day of June will wake in a few hours. I cross my hands over my chest, shielding myself from the light breeze.

"Waking up alone is getting old," I softly make Harry aware of my presence, and he turns to gaze at me.

"Hey, why are you awake?" He asks, his voice low and flat, his arm resting in an L shape.

"I'm not sure. Are you getting ready to go to work?" I ask, considering it's around the time he obliges to start getting ready. His hours are all over the place, and I can never keep track. I rarely wake up to him still in bed.

Harry shakes his head, "I don't feel too well."… "The pain is getting worse." His voice is flat and laced with pain he’s trying to hide.

"In your shoulder?" I softly challenge, and Harry nods his head just as enough light touches his face for me to recognise the fullness of his eyes and most of the colour drained from his face. "Go sit down, and I'll be right back," I instruct as I step back into the room and grab a robe.

I wrap the robe around me and exit my room. The door closes behind me, and I look both ways of the hallway, stopping when I recognise Matthew with his arms crossed and his figure stepping closer to me.

"Where exactly are you planning to go?" He questions.

"I need an ice pack or two. Will you accompany me?" I softly request, already knowing the answer. There's no chance of Matthew allowing me to walk around at this hour by myself.

Matthew and I wander the hushed hallways, passing closed doors and darkened rooms. The Palace at this hour is quite eerie. There's no staff bustling around, and if there is, there's very few of them. Everyone is mostly asleep. The only people awake are the security team and the kitchen staff, who get up early to prepare for the day. "Do you ever sleep, Matthew?"

Matthew laughs and shrugs his shoulders, "On occasions, Her Majesty."

"Why must you address me formally?" I groan, nudging him as we progress to walk back to my room.

"You are the Queen."

"My name is Anastasia," I correct Matthew. "So, when are we letting my husband take over as head of security?" I half-heartedly joke, wanting to proceed with the walk with conversation and not silence.

"Perhaps, when I retire," Matthew responds, "Thought you wanted him out of the security business?"

I shrug my shoulders, "I do, but I know he wants to work, so who am I to stand in his way?"

"He's good at what he does. Best worker I've had in my entire career."

"Mhm," I hum, "So, how much closer are we to finding my fathers murderer?"

"Anna, I will not discuss that with you," Matthew shakes his head, "On a rare occasion, I made a deal with Harry. I promised him I wouldn't tell you."

"Go figure," I roll my eyes, "I just want to be in the loop."

"You know enough, focus on running the monarchy and let me and him do our job," Matthew presses in a polite manner. No matter how hard I press, I don't foresee Matthew or Harry giving me too much information.

I am sure they have leads and their suspicions, and I am sure they can prove who killed who, but I want to know.

While walking back, I think about Louis. He told me earlier that he had the opportunity to be in Parliament and was running until Pippa knocked him down. After that, Pippa refused to let him be in the office, and my father agreed with her, stating he was too young to be playing in the business.

I don't think Pippa declined him and banished him for his age, but more so because she knew he would not be on her side. Louis joined the political party, but Pippa refused to let him stay on.

He was forced into his royal duties since Pippa refused his entry into Parliament.

Louis' life is a bit complicated. He isn't a royal on standard terms. Louis' parents are royals of the Kingdom of Sweden. He will never become a King; he is a very distant Prince, around tenth in line for the throne. He will only ascend the throne on the death of the entire family. Despite being born a Prince, Louis was not born in Sweden. He was born in the United Kingdom, therefore making him a citizen here.

Due to my father's tight ties with Sweden, they agreed to allow Louis to represent both countries as he got older. When Louis turned eighteen, he kept his title as Prince but showed his dedication to upholding both ties, wanting to be a part of the British notions. My father agreed, taking him under his wing. Louis spent most of his childhood here with me. At the time, I am sure our parents thought we would grow up to get married. Instead, I married a commoner, and he is dating an heir to the throne. Madeleine will ascend the throne on her mother's death; she will become the Queen of Denmark.

Louis wants to regain his role in Parliament, and I think he would be exceptional, but I don't believe Pippa will allow it. She will fight me tooth and nail, and I don't want to fight her on more issues. Louis will have to find a way to enter Parliament. Perhaps Harry can help him figure something out.

📷

I move into my room and close the door behind me, surprised when I don't recognise Harry on the balcony or in the bed. I follow the dim light to the bathroom and locate Harry leaning over the sink with the water running and his arm in an L shaped being held by his hand.

"What happened?"

"I moved my shoulder the wrong way, and the pain… fuck, the pain was so bad it had me throwing up," Harry breathes out, "Go back to bed, I'll be fine."

"I'm not going back to bed," I respond, caressing my hand to his back and rubbing soothing circles, "Do you want me to call the doctor up here?" I offer, clutching a face towel and running it under the water before holding it to his forehead.

"I don't think she can do anything."

"She can give you something for the pain," I suggest, dabbing his reddened cheeks and shifting away from a few stray and fallen curls from his forehead, "How long has it been like this?"

"It has been getting progressively worse over the last month. I can't move my shoulder much," Harry confesses.

"You've been lying to me."

"I didn't want you to worry," Harry responds, "I'm okay, really, please go back to bed." Harry leans away from the face towel and gestures towards the bedroom, still cradling his arm.

Harry and I step into the bedroom, and he sits on the edge of the bed with a groan. I grab the ice packs I ventured out to get, and I gingerly sit beside him on the bed. "It's going to be cold, but it'll help with the pain," I inform Harry.

"Anna, please don't touch my shoulder, I'm begging. I can't handle more pain."

"It won't be painful. It's just a cold pack," I assure Harry, holding the cold pack to his shoulder ever so gently. Harry instantly lets out a breath and bows his head. "Why didn't you say anything?"

"Been a bit busy," Harry responds, "Don't have time for this. Have the Ascott coming up and your royal tour."

"Well, you're going to have to make time," I sigh, holding the ice pack in place. "How are you feeling?"

"I am wonderful," Harry sarcastically responds, "Never felt better."

"No need for sarcasm," I mutter, rubbing his lower back while he takes a few deep breaths.

Harry has never been one to complain. On the contrary, he has barely missed a day of work since he began working at the Palace; even when he is sick, he has always showed up and done his best.

The royal doctor steps into the room and looks at me, "You look fine?" She challenges, scanning me up and down. I shake my head and gesture to Harry on the bed.

It is a change of events. For once, it isn't me calling for her to assist me; it is him.

"I am guessing you didn't follow up post-surgery, huh?" she questions, stepping towards Harry and bending down to kneel beside the bed.

Harry grunts and shakes his head, not bothering to defend himself. I had no clue things were this bad with his shoulder. I was under the impression the surgery went well, and he was on the road to a full recovery. He didn't show too many signs of pain until just recently. The doctor begins to check his vitals before taking a breath and touching his shoulder, putting pressure on him just enough to cause him to hiss. "I barely touched you," she defends, "Can you lift your arm?"

"If I could, do you think you would be here?" Harry snarls, letting out a heavy breath before apologising for his tone of voice.

"I am not going to stand here and waste time, and I am calling for you to go to the Hospital. I'll call for an ambulance."

"No," Harry shakes his head, "I can drive."

"Not a chance," the doctor shakes her head, "I know you are aware of what protocol is, and this is my protocol. You need surgery, and you're getting it, now," she informs him, taking her phone from her pocket and unlocking it. Harry groans in the background and continues to shake his head. He disputes the idea of an ambulance, arguing until we agree to find another way to get him to where he needs to be.

He's pretty stubborn, but I understand why he doesn't want an ambulance. He doesn't want attention drawn to him and doesn't believe he needs to take an ambulance from someone else when he is in perfect condition to wait.

♛ ♛ ♛

I remain in the hospital room with Matthew, both remaining in silence and staring at the oblique walls. At four in the morning, there isn't much to do or say. Against Harry's wishes, we brought him to King Edward VII's Hospital; he refused to be taken by ambulance, so we compromised and took him to the private Hospital by a car Matthew drove. He had exactly two minutes to sign medical papers before he was whisked off to surgery.

The Hospital is modest, with 56 beds and boasting more than four nurses to every patient. The Hospital has been in the family for decades. The Hospital was established in 1899 to treat injured soldiers fighting in the Second World War.

Just down the corridor from reception is the well-stocked library. It baffles me that there is such an extensive library, but others may want to read while waiting in anticipation. I don't want to read a novel about a love story, science or really anything. I want to be told that the surgery went well and Harry is okay.

I hear my phone go off, and I ignore it, continuing to stare at the walls, my foot tapping against the floor.

Ding, Ding, Ding.

I tiredly grab my phone, the dinging sounding every second causing me to glance towards Matthew. Matthew raises a brow, the irritating noise also coming from his phone.

I blink a few times at my screen, "You've got to be kidding me," I sigh profoundly, reading the banner on my phone that displays breaking news. "How? How does anyone know?" I immediately ask, clicking the link and beginning to read the article.

"Breaking news, on the advice of the Royal Highness's Doctor, one of Britain's royal members has been taken to Hospital. It is unknown which royal has been rushed in. The unknown monarch was taken by private car to King Edward VII Hospital in London.

All official engagements for this week, including the Queen's trip to Rome, will more than likely be postponed. The Queen is likely not to attend the Ascott. More information to come soon."

I glance towards Matthew, who shakes his head before he taps the phone screen and touches it to his ear. "I need Police officers to guard the entrance of King Edward VII Hospital, now." Matthew speaks into his phone, "And I need two guards at the entrance of room 15." Matthew ends the call and peers towards me, "Either someone saw us, or there is a palace snitch."

"What do we do?"

"Good question," Matthew bites on his lip as he operates his fingers through his hair. "I uh... I do not know. It is your decision... What should we tell the press?"

"It is none of their business. Harry is a private man."

Matthew nods, "He won't be too happy if we release his name."

"Can we say the articles are fake?"

"There are pictures…" Matthew shakes his head, "I'll think of something, don't stress over it. I'll handle it."

"Okay," I agree, "What do I do about a snitch? I don't want a snitch in my Palace."

"I will handle it. But, unfortunately, there are a few new guys who Harry and I didn't trust."… "Do I have permission to fire anyone I deem unfit?"

"Be my guest," I agree, putting my phone down.

I do not want my trust broken within my Palace. I should trust that all staff will keep their lips tightly sealed when it comes to private matters.

Harry will be pissed to find out that the media have written about this.

If there is a snake in my Palace, I will not allow them to get away with speaking to the press. Over the years, staff have been known to sell stories to the media for the right price. It drove my Father insane, but sometimes he understood the circumstances. As much as the staff are paid as well, there have been times during the years that the staff have not received enough to make ends meet.

♛ ♛ ♛

Harry and I relax on the balcony overlooking the beautiful garden behind the hospital, both of us taking the time to inhale the morning air and watch the gardens come to life as the sun continues to rise. Harry has a light blanket draped around his shoulders while in a shoulder sling to stop him from moving his shoulder too much. He looks miserable, but he isn't in as much unbearable pain that he was in and throwing up.

His free hand holds his cup of orange juice, and he screws his nose up with every drink he takes. "It isn't coffee," Harry huffs, "A little coffee won't hurt."

"You're on morphine, no," I shake my head, leaning back on my chair and enjoying the quiet morning.

"Fair point," Harry sighs, "Your first Royal tour is coming up. How do you feel about that?"

"Why are you making small talk?" I curiously ask, "You're meant to be sleeping."

"Hasn't fully kicked in yet," Harry answers, "I'm asking because I'm not going to be able to make it for the first part of your Royal tour."

I grow quiet, well aware that there's a good chance he won't be on tour with me. However, I had an idea after the events of the last few hours. Harry being in as much pain as he is in can only mean one thing— his surgery wasn't successful, and he will need another.

I have no desire to do the tour alone, I want him with me, but it isn't his fault. There comes a time I have to be a big girl and do what Queens do— keep moving forward.

I can do it on my own; I do not need him. I want him. I know the difference.

"I know," I softly sigh, "I suppose I'll think of something."

"I'm sorry, Anna."

"I know, I heard from the doctor… it was crucial to get it fixed," I remind him of the words she told him. She was very blunt with telling him.

"I don't think I can physically go; they're not going to let me. They want to do another surgery in a few days to fix the last part." Harry begins.

"I don't want you to push it back. I'll be fine. I've done tours before. I'm sure this will go smoothly. And maybe you'll be able to meet me for the last part of the tour?" I ask, and Harry nods his head.

"I'll do my best if I ever make it out of this hell hole."

"It isn't that bad," I glance over at him, and he raises a brow, disagreeing with me.

Harry cocks his head to the side, "Darling, if you weren't here, I'd be staring at the wall. But, unfortunately, all they have for entertainment are books."

"Well, you love to read."

"Not when I'm in pain and can barely see from my meds."

"Makes it even more fun," I joke, gently nudging him, "Do you want to go to the Palace? They might release you."

"Baby, they're not going to let me go until I have my last surgery. Then, according to them, I'm at flight risk of not coming back," Harry laughs, "And they're right, that's why I'm in this position because I didn't listen."

"You never listen," I respond, "Well, once your surgery is done, we can have you taken to the palace and have you cared for there."

"Can you be my nurse?"

I shake my head, "No, you have a smirk on your lips, which means one thing."

"Oh, come on," Harry whines, "I need a little TLC."

"You get enough TLC." I chuckle, shaking my head, "You're getting sleepy. Back inside, you go," I gesture inside, standing to my feet and holding his arm as he stands up as well.

[thiswasinevitableid]

17 chosen and 20 lunar for Indruck, nsfw, please!

Here you go!

Lieutenants Log, stardate 10015, Joseph Stern recording

We’ve finally arrived at an agreement with the Aquariads, the species who control this moon. They will allow our research team unfettered access to the planet, but at an odd price. They requested one of our crew agree to be married off to a high ranking member of their governing council. 

I suspect, but cannot prove, that this is not a desirable being to be married to. He’s a revered seer, and yet they’re willing to couple him to a human and not one of their own? Suspicious.

Myself and the other single members of the crew were all given extensive questionnaires on everything from our sexual preferences to our daily habits. It took me a good hour and a half to finish it. 

After a full earth day of waiting, we received word that chief astrobotanist Duck Newton was the chosen human. I have no idea how this happened, as Duck has little tolerance for what he views as “woo-woo” things like precognition. But he was chosen all the same. 

Because this is Duck, he grumbled a bit, but cheered up when he learned he would only be required to stay with his new husband for three weeks before joining us on our field word, and that we can send him specimens for identification and research. If we decide Aquaria is the planet we’ve been looking for and establish more permanent research stations here, Duck will be expected to spend at least a few days a month with the seer. Mama made it clear that if the idea was truly not something he could agree to, she would call the deal off and we could try another approach. Duck said that wouldn’t be necessary, and that he could think of far worse things they could have asked of us. 

We deposit him at the seers home tomorrow. After that, we begin our exploration of Aquaria, fourth moon of the plant Oceana and (hopefully) the home of the antidote we’ve been searching for. 

Joseph Stern, Lieutenant on the spaceship Amnesty, signing off.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Duck waves to the skiff as it pulls away, his planetside bag slung over his shoulder. There’s only one way to go; down the single stone levee, decorated with beautiful tiles, to the massive mansion at the end. 

It reminds him of the photos of Venice he’s seen in old National Geographics, beautiful buildings floating atop a planet of water. He knows Aquaria has islands, but the majority of it’s cities are on or near the water because most of its residents live beneath the waves. They remind Duck of mermaids, with scaled tails and fins giving way to humanoid upper bodies and faces. As far as creatures to get politically married off to, he could be staring down worse. 

There’s still the problem of not knowing why this mer is off by himself and without a partner. Or, as becomes obvious once Duck is inside, any company at all. The other high-ranking aquariads they’ve met come with miles of attendants; here there’s only the high, curved ceilings and rippling water. Maybe the guy is shy? Or maybe he’s a dick? Or just real fucking scary to look at?

As he walks further into the house, he notices the tiled walls are covered in striking murals that, when coupled with the odd half-light allowed in by the green glass windows, makes him feel as though he’s wandering through a dream. The pools and canals criss-cross the floor, and really the ground is more water than concrete, the fact he’s able to walk at all is a concession to the fact some aquariads evolved to be land dwelling. 

A splash makes him turn, and in the pool to his right a black fin cuts the water. He steels himself to not insult the alien he’s now legally attached to. The figure rises from the water, setting his arms on the edge of the stony floor and Duck steps back as a wide, toothy smile appears in an angular face. 

“Hello, Duck Newton.” His tail is the same black as his fin, and his silver hair is tucked behind ears of the same color, which Duck has learned can fan out as a way of communicating. 

“Uh, hi. You must be-”

“Indrid Cold, yes. Apologies, a peril of my profession is that I will always be a little bit ahead.”

“Right. So, uh, guess we’re gonna be seein a lot of each other the next couple of weeks.” He aims for a joking, nonchalant tone. 

“Yes, as we’re married.” He cocks his head, confused, then grins brighter, “Oh, oh I see, you are attempting levity because this is all very awkward. I, ah, I appreciate that. Here, let me show you where you’ll be staying” Indrid pushes off the wall, swimming gracefully on his back as Duck follows him down the hall. The center of the house has more skylights, allowing him to see that his host’s fins aren’t pure black; small silver and white dots are scattered across it. He wonders if he could find constellations in them.

“Here we are.” Indrid gestures to a room, one where the only water is in the form of two deep blue half-circles on the left and right walls. The center of the room is a large bed, linens gleaming whites and pale greens, and the skylight nestles against a chandelier of finely detailed rosey glass. 

“Holy shit.” Duck sets his bag down on a trunk near the door.

“Do you like it?” A flash of yellow up Indrid’s fin, echoed in the dots on his tail.

“I mean, anythin looks ritzy after months on a spaceship but” he turns, smiles, “yeah, I do. Thanks for giving me such nice digs.”

“You are most welcome. Now, this room is designed to give guests privacy. See that red panel on the wall? If you press it, it opens the pool on that side up to the rest of the house, allowing myself or servants to come in and help you.”

“So you do have staff.”

“They’re, ah, more like errand folk. None live here.” Indrid clears his throat, “I can show you the rest of the house, although if you need to sleep I can let you be. I am, ah, not entirely clear on where your internal clock sits now.”

“Aquaria’s days are about four days longer than earth’s, so I ain’t too thrown off. Happy to see more of the place.”

Indrid nods, and Duck follows him out of the bedroom. Most of the other rooms they pass are sparse squares of walkways and still water, under which lies the parts of the house Indrid uses. When they reach Indrid’s quarters, he spots what looks to be an artists’ studio under the clear blue water. 

“You paint?” He kneels and peers down for a better look, Indrid bobbing nearby. 

“Indeed. Art helps me make sense of my visions, and I enjoy it besides. In fact, all the murals you see in this house are my doing. There are even more under water.”

“Damn, that’s fuckin incredible. If I get my SCUBA gear rigged up, maybe I can get a tour?”

“Scu--oh, yes, an underwater breathing apparatus. We have a much smaller device that can help you breathe and sea down here” he dips his head at the pool, “unfortunately, the one I commissioned for you will not arrive until close to the end of your stay. They, ah, did not give me much time to prepare. Hence the lack of many comforts I might otherwise give, as well as places for you to and I to talk, eat or do, ah, other activities together.” The yellow intermittently flashing up his fin gives way to a burst of pink. 

Oh, right. Duck pulls up his infopad (given a generous waterproofing treatment prior to his leaving Amnesty) and opens the contract he signed. 

“Yeah. About that. Says here they expect us to, uh, ‘consummate’ the marriage.”

“I’m aware” Indrid’s voice creeps up.

“Do you...wanna do that now?” He spins a finger in the water.

“I, ah, I beg your pardon?”

“I mean, seems like we could just get it outta the way, rather than have the fact we gotta fuck someone we didn’t pick hangin over our heads?” 

“This...this is not at all how I wanted this to go.” 

Duck looks up and immediately wishes he could reverse time; Indrid looks genuinely hurt, ears flicked back like a scolded dog. 

“Duck I, ah, well, you did not choose me, that is true. But I chose you.”

“Well, fuck.” He sits down with a heavy sigh, “figured some big wigs used those surveys to pick me out. Guess what they say about assumin things is true.”

“.....”

“It makes an ass outta you and me?”

Indrid blinks, then snickers, “Your humor is part of why I chose you. It is very bad, but also extremely good.”

“Glad you think so. Pretty sure Mama was ready to blow me out the airlock for some of the ones I made on the way here.” He knows he’s dodging the conversation they should be having, but how the fuck is he supposed to respond when an alien mermaid tells him he picked him to be his husband?

Indrid swims over so he can rest his arms and chin on the stone, glancing shyly up at Duck as he says, “I suppose I also made an ass of myself, as you would say, by assuming you would not see this as an obligation.”

“I mean, even if you chose me, don’t this feel like an obligation to you?”

“No. For me, it is a reminder that most of my kind are too afraid of me to even give me a chance to court them. And that the council thinks I will get into too much trouble without someone to distract me now and then, and decides the company I am worthy of is an alien explorer with no interest in me.”

“I mean, the only reason we agreed to this is because there might be a plant on Aquaria that can treat the illness runnin rampant back home. So at least it’s for a good cause?”

Indrid flicks his ears, red running up his fin, “What you are doing is noble. What I am doing is being used as a way to keep your exploration team in line.”

Duck winces, “Fuck, I’m, uh, I’m just gonna stop talkin now.”

For an agonizing five minutes they sit there in silence, contemplating their situation and stealing glances at each other. Duck always tried to do the right thing, tried to live an honest life and treat the people in it with respect. He’s been kind and polite to beings up and down the galaxy. He can extend some of that to his own husband, can’t he?

“Indrid?”

The alien raises his head.

“Can we start over?”

“Yes. But I do not see how-”

Duck holds out his hand, “Name’s Duck. Thanks for invitin me in and lookin after me the few weeks.”

Indrid’s smile widens as he understands the game, and he takes the human’s hand, “A pleasure to meet you. I am Indrid, seer to the court of Aquaria, and your anxious husband in spite of the now-changing, much more pleasant futures.”

They finish their tour, the humid air less stifling in the wake of their confessions. Indrid shows him the kitchen, the sitting room, and the gardens which, to Duck’s delight, are as much above the water as below. 

After that, Indrid excuses himself to attend to seer duties and Duck goes back to his room to unpack. As he’s putting away his toothbrush and razor near a large, elaborate tub carved from golden stone, one of Indrid’s admissions from earlier floats through his mind, bobbing there like a buoy until he gets a chance to ask it.

When they’re in the gardens, Duck taking notes as Indrid dives and surfaces with new things to show him, the human slips his feet into the water and says, “Indrid? You said my offerin to fuck you wasn’t what you wanted. What, uh, what did you want?” 

The alien blinks, slowly, pink and teal flashing in his tail, “It is a bit silly in retrospect, but since I knew we would not have time for a proper human marriage courtship, I thought I could mimic the process leading to a one night stand; that way you would be romanced in a manner that made you both comfortable with me and the concept of sex with a relative stranger.” 

Duck chuckles, “Always wild to find out how human stuff gets interpreted by the rest of the galaxy. How’d you even come up with what you were gonna do?”

Indrid crosses his arms, mock affronted, “I will have you know I have seen a great deal of human media, courtesy of our minister of defense.”

“Oh yeah?” Duck shifts onto his stomach, sends a small splash Indrid’s way, “what was this night gonna involve, then?”

“Food, dim and therefore, apparently, romantic lighting, dancing to sensual music, and then hopefully some kissing.” The pink in his tail intensifies, “and then working out exactly how to have sex human.”

The mixture of enthusiasm and being utterly out of his element charms Duck to no end; not to mention it’s the most thought someone’s put into a hook-up with him in the last three years. 

“Seems to me you got the gist of it. Though I really wanna know what you picked out for ‘sensual music.’”

A playful glint enters Indrid’s glowing eyes, “I will show you, but we must go through the whole evening, otherwise it will seem like a disjointed choice. With, ah, with the understanding that you are not obligated to kiss me at the end.

“You got a deal.”

“Wonderful” Indrid claps his hands together, “wait right here.”

Indrid disappears in a whoosh of black and silver. When he returns, he hoists six opaque domes onto the floor in front of Duck, “I initially planned to eat in the sitting room, but you like this room much better, so we can have dinner here.” With that, he double-taps the top of each dome, revealing a confusing buffet. 

“Uh, are those french fries?”

“Yes. You are from the United States of America, and so I chose foods that would make you feel at home.” Indrid points to each plate in turn, “french fries, steak, a turkey with cranberries, lobster, macaroni with cheese, and an apple pie.”

The pie is covered with an odd, yellow meringue, the turkey is the size of a quail, and the black shell suggests this is not a kind of lobster he’s eaten before, but Duck can’t stop smiling.

“Also I took care to be sure none of the necessary substitutions were poisonous to you.”

“Thanks, Indrid.” He means it; in their travels they’ve learned it’s not only humans who think everyone lives and eats exactly the way they do.

Everything except the french fries tastes strange but he finds the meal, like it’s orchestrator, intriguing in it’s oddity. Indrid brings two cool, white bottles from below, offers Duck tastes of each. One is like the celery soda he drank on a dare, the other like root beer if it wasn’t gross. He keeps the second one next to him as the meal progresses, Indrid asking him all kinds of questions about botany and himself. When dinner is over, Indrid guides him two rooms over, grinning excitedly. 

“I will start the music; one moment.” 

A few seconds after he dives, a chrome cylinder descends from the ceiling and music fills the air.

Ninety-nine red balloons

Floating in the summer sky

Panic bells, it's red alert!

There's something here from somewhere else!

He giggles, sits down so it’s easier to call, “Indrid? Not sure you got the right song bud.”

A silver-haired head pops up, “Not romantic?”

“Nope.”

“Hmmmm” He lifts a small, white rectangle and the song changes. 

He was a famous trumpet man from out Chicago way

He had a boogie style that no one else could play

He was the top man at his craft

But then his number came up and he was gone with the draft

He's in the army now, a blowin' reveille

He's the boogie woogie bugle boy of Company B

“N-not quite” The laugh is stronger now.

“Drat. How about….”

I threw a wish in the well, don't ask me, I'll never tell

I looked to you as it fell and now you're in my way 

Indrid looks hopefully at him.

“Ain’t what I’d call sensual, but you’d hear it at the kind of place you’d pick up a date.”

The alien beams, starts shifting back and forth to the beat, “shall we dance?”

Duck blushes, pretends he doesn’t know why, “Uh, probably should have said this earlier, but I ain’t much of a dancer.”

Indrid swims to him, stopping close enough that Duck can see the lines on his face that reveal they’re close in age, “That’s alright. Sometimes conversing while having a drink is acceptable behavior, correct?”

“Yeah.” Duck doesn’t bother to hide how intently he’s watching as Indrid dives, his form elegant and ethereal beneath the water. 

They sit sipping a hard cider that tastes of papaya and flowers instead of apples until the three other moons glow bright in the skylight. Duck yawns, and excuses himself for the night. 

“Thanks for a great evenin, Indrid.”

“You are most welcome. A pity I could not make the music work.”

He’s here for another three weeks at least. And Indrid is floating through the darkening water like a dream he’s tempted to chase.

“Guess you’ll just have to try again.” Duck winks. 

Indrid’s ears frill slightly and he flashes bright purple, “Yes, my dear husband, I suppose I will.” 

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Duck’s routine is not the one he usually has while docked on a planet. Every day for the last week, he wakes up, joins Indrid for a leisurely swim, works on his research, and then spends his evening with a weirdly cute alien trying to accurately recreate the earth dating experience for him. 

The second night, he asked if Indrid would bring him some of his favorites for their next meal. The steamed coconut crab was a hit. The mantis-squid served still swimming, less so. From then on, when Indrid put in his food orders to the cooks at the main court, it was for a mixture of earth and Aquariad dishes, each one leading him or Indrid to share an anecdote from their time on their home planet. 

For the last two nights, he’s lifted the partitions on the pools in his room so Indrid can talk with him until neither of them can keep their eyes open. He wonders if it would be rude to ask him to stay, to sleep in such a small space just so he could be the first thing Duck sees when he wakes up.

There must be floating beds he could put in Indrid’s room, or maybe a hammock he could hang in the garden. 

Duck now understands that Indrid’s powers make him politically valuable, but also mean his fellow residents of the lunar city see him as dangerous, as knowing things they’d rather keep secret. Duck understands, especially if their only time encountering the seer is when he glides his formidable, dark body from the depths of his inner sanctum. But all he can see is his Indrid, awkward and well-meaning, whose fear of Duck disliking him has given way to genuine affection. His Indrid, who now pulls himself up onto the stones so they can sit shoulder to shoulder after breakfast or before dinner, whose tail Duck’s fingers beg to caress. 

His Indrid who is, at this moment, continuing his losing battle with earth music. 

“How about this?”

Danke schoen, darling, danke schoen

Thank you for all the joy and pain

“Oh fuck no” Duck guffaws, “anything but him, ‘Drid, he’s a boner killer if there ever was one.”

“I don’t think he’s that bad,  but I will be speaking to Vincent about his human music suggestions.”

“For the love of god, turn it off.” Duck flails for the remote.

Indrid sticks out his tongue, “Very well, but I am this close to pulling you down here and seeing if you can do any better.”

“You wouldn’t dare” Duck is still laughing, eyes closing as he does, which means he gets only a splash of warning before he’s yanked into the pool. He comes up giggling and spluttering, “now, is that any way to treat your husband?”

Indrid’s laugh is a siren song, “No, I suppose not.” The music clicks off as Indrid steadies him by curving his tail behind his legs, “how should I treat you instead?”

Duck drapes his arms over Indrid’s shoulders, “You been treatin me pretty damn well, dunkin me aside.”

A flicker of pink and yellow as Indrid rubs their cheeks together, “And if I wanted to be even better?”

“I, uh, I mean if you wanted to we could tryYYYYohfuck” he hunches forward as Indrid’s tail drags across his dick. The clothing on Aquaria is thin, so he can feel the cool scales tease his skin. 

“Oh, oh dear, apologies, I was only trying to embrace you further, I forgot yours do not stay concealed until they’re needed.”

“You, you keep doin that and it’s gonna be needed real quick.”

“Oh?” red eyes narrow wickedly, “does my sweet husband need attending to?” Another drag of his tail, much more deliberate, and Duck grinds his hips in reply. 

“Only if you want to.”

“I do, so very badly.” Indrid nuzzles his nose, “may I take a little while to acquaint myself with your wonderful body?”

“Uh huh.” Duck tugs his shirt off, throwing it onto the land and then giving his shorts the same treatment. 

“Ohhhhhhyes.” Indrid purrs, fins and tails shimmering purple and gold. Then he sinks down, swimming in a slow, tight circle around the human. Pleased chirps and trills bubble up to Duck’s ears. Cool fingers play along his legs and belly, eventually finding his dick and offering an experimental stroke.

“Fuck” he groans, and Indrid does it again, kissing his navel as both hands rub and tease his dick and folds. Indrid is clearly experimenting, maybe even using his visions to guide him, and Duck eagerness to get off succumbs to just how fucking hot it is to have a partner this enrapt by his body, to have them explore it like some awe-inspiring landscape. 

He spreads his hands out and runs them along Indrid’s torso and tail; the scales are just as wonderful under his fingers as he hoped, and he can feel Indrid sigh happily as he pets him. 

Then lips close around his dick and he makes a series of undignified noises, digging one hand into Indrid’s hair to encourage him. 

“Ohmyfuckinchrist, Indrid, yes, fuck please keep suckin like that.”

Indrid wiggles his whole body in response, happy trill underscored by a firmer suck. Duck can’t get enough of his body beneath his hands, of his mouth on Duck’s skin, and he wonders if someone can black out from how good a blowjob feels. 

Indrid’s fin breaks the water and Duck runs an appreciative thumb along the top. Funny, there’s a little depression between it and the membrane of the fin. Curious, he drags his pinky along it. 

The alien bursts upwards with a loud chirp of joy, “Ohgoodness, yes, oh that feels nice please do it again.”

“Yeah? My cute, needy husband need me to play with his fins to get off.”

“Not, not technically by my gods does he want you to.”

“Don’t worry darlin, I will--uh, ‘Drid? Is, is that your dick?”

Indrid follows his gaze to the thick, bumpy shaft emerging from his tail, it’s tip crowned with short, searching tendrils.

“Yes. Also an ovipositor, hence those lumps.”

“Holyfuck. Uh, I, I ain’t sure I’m ready for that yet.” 

“That’s perfectly alright. Though it does mean my cock is not going into you tonight; I’m not sure I can control my bodily responses enough to avoid ovipositing accidentally.”

“Lots of others things we can do.” Duck bites the tip of one ear, making the other flare out.

“Indeed. I say we start with this.” Indrid’s tail encircles his waist just as Indrid shoves his cock between his thighs.

“Like, like the way you think sugar. Fuuuck, fuck that’s good.” The bumps from the eggs have just the right amount of give as he humps them, Indrid matching his tempo with his thrusts. He keeps his arms around his husbands neck, kissing him furiously. Indrid kisses back with a chirp, gold flashing in his scales, and Duck knows he won’t want to kiss anyone else for a long, long time. 

The tip of Indrid’s cock bumps his ass and he groans at what that suggests about it’s size. 

“I’m, I’m takin this fuckin perfect thing all the way before I go.” He bucks his hips harder to make his point, “gonna let you fuck me open on it, fill me up, wanna know what it’s like to cum with you inside me.”

“Oh gods” Indrid whimpers, hiding his face in Ducks neck as he squeezes his thighs together. 

“And, and you’re gonna be a dutiful fuckin husband and fill me however I say, ain’t you?”

“Yes, yesofcourse, goodness Duck I, I’m-”

“Heh, you like that, mr high and mighty seer likes bein bossed around. Well, lucky you, because now that I know just how fuckin good you are at fuckin me, gonna have you doin it ever, fuckin, day.” He jerks his hips hard, three times, and Indric cums with a cry, cock pulsing as he sinks his teeth into Ducks shoulder. Duck doesn’t let up, chases his orgasm over the bumps and ridges until he nearly whites out with pleasure, clinging to Indrid tighter as his body gives up on supporting him. 

After his cock retracts Indrid, still holding Duck up with ease, swims to the button that orders a cleaning cycle on the pool and deposits the human back on the stone. 

“I dearly hope your team finds what you need on this planet so that I may see you beyond these few weeks.”

“Sex was that good?” Duck teases, petting Indrid’s hair as he lays his head in his lap.

“No. Or, well, yes, but more than that you are so, so very wonderful. I wish to get to know you more, to show you even more of my world and my skill in bed.”

Duck kisses the top of his head, “I hope so too.”

-----------------------------------------

Communication log between leader of Amnesty Mission at Astrobotanist Duck Newton. 

Mama: Got some promising leads. Will be back to pick you up in three days. 

Duck: Glad to hear it. But take your time, no need to rush only my account. 

[thebibliomancer]

Essential Avengers: Avengers #246: GATHERINGS

August, 1984

Family feud! Guest-starring SERSI of the Eternals!

She comes!

A portent of times to come! I hear a faint rumbling of leather jackets from distant years...

Also, hey! She-Hulk! I missed you!

The Avengers have been through the Secret Wars and participated in the Wraith War! What’s next for our band of heroes?

Maybe parties? The cover makes it look like a party is going on before some Kirby-looking guys crashed.

But also? Vision’s vague scheming to raise the Avengers’ profile continues as he and Scarlet Witch take a trip to visit President Reagan and First Lady Reagan at the White House.

Weird thing is that we don’t get an unobscructed view of Reagan’s face. He’s either back to the ‘camera’ or cropped on the panel border. Weird, since this wasn’t a problem last time he appeared in this book. Y’know, the time some plant people tried to hold him for ransom? That time?

President Didn’t-Pay-for-the-Likeness-Rights thanks Vision for taking time to personally brief him on all the biz the Avengers have been up to.

President Reagan: “I wish we could talk like this more often! The National Security Council keeps me posted on your missions, but there’s nothing like getting the news firsthand.”

Vision: “I quite agree, Mr. President. In fact, I have a few suggestions for making the lines of communication between Avengers Mansion and the White House more... shall we say... direct?”

He suggests they speak in private which Reagan gladly agrees to, shooing Scarlet Witch and Mrs. Reagan out. To Scarlet Witch’s surprise because he sprang the trip on Washington on her and now he’s sprung this on her.

Also, every time Vision meets someone in private and the conversation takes place off-panel, they suddenly come around to his point of view so.... uh...

Well, I’m sure it’s fine.

Meanwhile, we get back to Captain Monica Marvel Rambeau’s subplot. Remember how she worried after getting back from Secret Wars that she had no explanation to give her family for being missing for several days? And was thinking of telling them about her secret superhero thing?

Well, she calls home to New Orleans and her presumably firefighter dad answers. I presume he’s a firefighter because there’s a firefighter hat and coat hanging up prominently in the background. We call that environmental storytelling.

Monica’s mom isn’t home so Monica asks for her parents to call her back when they’re both available.

Monica: “In a way, I’m glad momma wasn’t home. That gives me more time to figure out how I’m going to tell them that their ‘little girl’ is leading a double life... as an Avenger called Captain Marvel!”

... Geez, her costume looks so weird when there’s nobody in it.

Monica ponders just bringing it up casually by RECAPPING HER ENTIRE BACKSTORY! Which, in fairness, would be an appropriate way to handle it. But she decides that just going ‘yeah I was helping old family friend Professor LeClare investigate a secret lab on an oil platform, punched a machine, got powers, and then joined the Avengers’ would sound crazy and that there must be a better way to tell them.

I say, take it slow and ramp up. Start from ‘I have superpowers’, do a little pew pew flashlight beam and let their questions guide your explanation.

Meanwhile again but elsewhere, Wasp van Dyne is just chilling at Avengers Mansion, bumming herself out rereading the World According to Garp, and receiving a phone call from West Avengers Chairman Hawkeye.

He tells her that he found a great HQ for the new West Coast Avengers, some old silent film star’s home, and he’s overseeing renovations now.

This ongoing Hawkeye real estate subplot is to get you excited for the upcoming West Coast Avengers series. Are you?

I dread it.

Anyway, Starfox comes in after the phone call and recognizes that Janet is in a Mood. A very bored mood. A post-chairperson funk.

Wasp: “It’s just that Wanda and the Vision are in Washington... Hawkeye and his new wife are setting up a new team in California... Cap and Thor are away on missions of their own... Everybody’s doing something! Everybody but me! It’s funny, after all we’ve been through lately, especially with that horrible Magneto, you’d think I’d appreciate a little leisure time. But instead, I’m bored out of my mind!”

Magneto kissing her really teed her off if that’s what she’s focusing on from the whole Secret Wars thing and not having died.

Starfox has just the answer for Wasp’s post-Magneto-kissing blues though.

PARTY.

He was on his way to a great party and Wasp can be his plus one!

Meanwhile, on the Washington to New York plane, Vision and Scarlet Witch.

She’s confused why they didn’t just take the Quinjets that they have instead of flying on a commercial airline but Vision says that getting out among the people is just good public relations.

I mean, he’s not wrong. But also flying in public, in your costumes, seems like it runs the risk of aggroing a supervillain attack.

It doesn’t happen but I wouldn’t have been surprised if it did.

The flight attendant asks Vision if he drinks before course correcting into asking him if he wants a drink.

I don’t know what’s more amazing here. Wanda going ‘he never has coffee at home’ like that coffee ad that Airplane spoofed.

Or Vision patting himself on the back for connecting to the common man with his drink order.

Simply superb.

Back at the casa Rambeau, Maria Rambeau returns and then returns Monica’s call. Monica says she’s going to come over for dinner and then a panel later, she’s knocking on the door.

Her parents are confused because it’s a twenty-minute drive between Monica’s house and theirs but that’s just part of what Monica wants to explain to them.

I see Monica decided to just jump into her explanation.

Back in New York, Janet frets over whether she’s dressed right for the party but Starfox just dismisses that as one of Earth’s weird mores. Why, he only wears the one outfit and that’s just gonna have to be good enough.

They arrive at the party and it seems to be a hobnobbin’ sort of event, with people discussing court settlements and acting. Also, She-Hulk is there. Hi, She-Hulk!

Glad Stern found another excuse to include you after Byrne stole you away to the land of the Fantastic.

She-Hulk says she met the host at an exotic bakery shop just last week and that’s how she scored the invite.

I wonder what made these baked goods so exotic. And I’m wondering if it wasn’t actually erotic. Do I think that She-Hulk would purchase a butt cake? Yes, yes I do.

She asks Starfox how he knows the host and, well, he doesn’t. He heard about the party and decided to invite himself (and Wasp) along. I.e. crash.

But the host...

ITS SHE!

SERSI!

SHE COMES!

But the host, Sylvia Sersi, isn’t too bothered by the pair of party-crashing Avengers and has She-Hulk introduce them.

Starfox is enchanted to meet Sersi and she likewise but they’d best not be too enchanted to meet each other because I’m pretty sure they’re not too distant relations.

Mentor founded the Titan colony of the Eternals and the Eternals have all been around a while so there’s not that many branches between Starfox and Sersi, I don’t think.

Anyyyyyway.

A drunk man pauses before a mirror to tidy up his tie and gets a startle when a Watcher-looking guy that isn’t the Watcher because he has hair appears in the mirror instead of his own face.

When Sersi comes over to investigate she tells him he must have imagined it and sends the guy away for some air but then interrogates the mirror face man and calls him Domo.

Domo, in the mirror: “We need you here in Olympia! Everyone is needed for the final decision!”

Sersi: “I told you before, I don’t care! Go ahead and make your big decision! It won’t affect me, because I intend to go right on doing as I please!”

Then she turns the mirror into a picture of penguins??

Her powers are great indeed.

Although her investment in the community is less so.

Whatever this mysterious decision everyone is voting on, it is clearly less important than this rockin’ party. This party has a She-Hulk!

Back over at the Rambeaus, Monica decides to just rip off the band-aid and tell her parents that she’s Captain Marvel. They find it hard to believe so she just pulls out her costume and lightspeeds into it.

Harder to hold doubts when your daughter glows with an awesome power.

Frank Rambeau: “It’s true... my little girl’s an Avenger. Hey, that means... you’ve met Captain America!”

Frank jumping right to the important points.

Thankfully, Monica’s parents are very supportive. And actually like the Avengers. You have cool parents, Monica.

Frank Rambeau: “Monica, I don’t know what to say! The Avengers are heroes... like Cap and the Black Panther and Thor... They’re like a legend! To think that you’re one of them -- !”

Maria Rambeau: “We’re very, very proud of you, dear... Prouder than we ever thought possible!”

Very cool parents.

Meanwhile, back at the party, mirror spooked guy (apparently Harry) goes out for air like Sersi suggested and then sees something else which spooks him even harder!

He runs from the party babbling about seeing things or not seeing things and not sticking around to sort out which.

Then a bunch of goons crash the party by flying through the terrace doors.

Look at these total goons.

Starfox steps forward and tries to defuse the situation both by words

Starfox: “Easy, my friends! I’m sure you don’t want to hurt anyone!”

And by shooting pleasure beams from his mind.

Predictably, his pleasure beam, besides being creepy, can’t be allowed to be too effective.

If it actually worked we wouldn’t have conflict and plot.

So like the Hulk in Incredible Hulk #300, these dudes called Delphans just slap Starfox out of the way.

Then superhero number two steps up.

One of the Delphans say that they need to get “that witch” before she can cause them any grief and She-Hulk was in proximity and assumes they meant her and takes exception to that.

She-Hulk: “‘Witch’, huh? You wouldn’t mean me, would you? That’s a bad choice of words, but you’re right about one thing... I can give plenty of grief!”

The Delphan just immediately hits her with an energy pole which just pisses off She-Hulk and ruins her party dress. Thankfully she had the unstable molecules FF costume on underneath.

She dresses in layers.

Delphan: “You’re still standing? But that photon-burst would have stunned the mighty Karkas!”

She-Hulk: “You stupid jerk! Do you have any idea how hard it is to find nice things in my size?!”

She-Hulk and Starfox start beating on the Delphans but its Sersi’s party and she can shoot eye beams if she wants to, eye beams if she wants to.

Sersi: “I should have known Domo would send you Delphans after me! Well, it won’t work! You’re not taking me away without a fight!”

Not just eyebeams but apparently a piggifying beam!

A singing piggifying beam!

Oh, sure, the Delphan says that its a transmutive ability but I know whats what.

Her name is Sersi, which is like Cerci, and she can shoot pig beams at people, especially Greek soldiers.

Unfortunately, like other witches before her, she needs some wrist range of movement to do her business and grabbing her by the arms will just nullify her.

Sigh.

If only he didn’t have armored outpanties, she could kick him in the business.

But fortunately, Wasp “can blow up a small house” van Dyne won’t be stopped by armored outerwear and shoots the Delphan grabbing Sersi right in the butt.

That is, Wasp shoots him in the butt, not that he’s grabbing Sersi in the butt.

Meanwhile, over in the Vision and Scarlet Witch subplot, their plane lands at LaGuardia and they’re instantly accosted by journalists who wants Vision’s take on rumors that the president is going to make chairmanship of the Avengers a cabinet-level post.

Vision coyly tells them that he and the president discussed many things but he’s not at liberty to confirm anything.

Hmm.

Then Vision excuses himself, saying that he and Wanda have to get back to Avengers Mansion.

Scarlet Witch: “We certainly do!” And when we get there, we are going to have a little talk!

Seems Wanda is annoyed at all this being left out of the loop.

Back at the A-plot, where A stands for Avengers go to a party and then get into a fight, Sersi gets fed up with these shenanigans and threatens to turn the Delphans into worms but she gets grabbed by the wrists again, this time by power-dampening chonky handcuffs, and dragged away by the Delphans to their spaceship that was hovering right outside the party.

Starfox and Wasp fly out in pursuit, with non-flying She-Hulk complaining about being left behind.

Wasp: “After them, Starfox! We mustn’t let them get away!”

Starfox: “I quite agree! Hostesses such as Ms. Sersi are all too rare!”

Wasp: “No kidding! Once we rescue her, I want to find out how she does that trick with her eyes!”

... Really.

The eyes specifically? Not the singing pig beam?

Huh. To each their own.

The ship takes off shortly after Wasp and Starfox stow aboard and the two heroes resume beating Delphan ass to try to save Sersi.

Lead Delphan: “We have the advantage in number, but they’re still making us look like idiots! We can’t let them beat us now! Have to initiate transport... while there’s still a chance!”

The ship then disappears with a FWOF!

And reappears above the mountains of Northern Greece.

Apparently, Eternal transportation is like the kind in Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy because Starfox and Wasp are discombobulated and nauseated by the transport.

The Lead Delphan seizes the opportunity while the bull is hot and pulls the lever to make the ship just completely disassemble.

The Delphans take advantage of the heroes startlement to beat the shit out of Starfox in midair.

Clever. But rude.

Sometime later, Starfox comes to in Olympia to discover that he and Wasp are completely surrounded and in the shit.

Domo: “Citizens of Olympia!! At last, we all stand together... reunited with our Polar and Pacific cousins! Our destiny beckons! But before the ritual may begin, we must first deal with these two... who have intruded into the affairs of the Eternals!”

Hey, dick! They don’t come to a party you’re crashing and slap the host!

But I guess we’re going to meet all the Eternals next time.

What a fun coincidence that I’m hitting this point of the story when the Eternals movie is just a few months away.

Follow @essential-avengers​ because one day I’ll read comics about Sersi wearing a leather jacket. Like and reblog for the same reason or for different reasons.

[felassan]

TEVINTER NIGHTS details (new)

ohh shit ohh fuckk Not a drill! Under the cut because spoilers. Don’t look if you want to read these short stories unspoiled.

serious SPOILER WARNING.

also please bear in mind I was working from fragments and trying my best to infer, so it’s not going to be perfectly correct like an oracle!

Dorian is in it

Maevaris is in it

Vaea is in it

no Zevran from what I can see sorry :’( [but bear in mind I can’t see all of it] BUT there is reference to House Arainai

Solas is mentioned at least 4 times by the name Solas

Solas or his new cultists seemingly have ordered his/their agents “Death before capture” they fucking SUICIDE PILL rather than be captured WTF?? or at least one agent in a story does. (see quotes below)

it also reads like they’re blowing up/bombing/trying to blow up towns of thousands of people???

Felassan is mentioned

A FEMALE ELF WHO SHAPESHIFTED INTO A HALLA and then a falcon and a snowy owl. she has short hair, freckles and striking features; I’m love

STRIFE THE ELF. 

a reference to the HoF; or more specifically an assassin family lost face when they failed to complete a contract on their life

An Executor is in it and talks, has interactions with several different types of characters

werewolves!!

in the first story a City Elf-turned-Dalish and a lowborn Tevinter mage are taken as slaves by invading Qunari during their invasion of Tevinter, escape and learn to work together to overcome their prejudices and such in order to survive (since they were chained together). Dalish/elvhen lore is quite prominent in this short.

The Qunari are moving into Rivain. “You need to get word to the clans before they land.” Clans in Rivain confirmed again?

Divine Victoria appears, seems to be kept neutral/non-specific i.e. can be any of the 3

Venatori mentions

red lyrium encounters

there’s a new Dalish clan name given, Oranavra

one story seems to deal with a clan getting back their precious ironbark halla statue

Andruil mentioned several times. Ghilan’nain mentioned

we’re going to Arlathan Forest. it has entities protecting it called Forest Guardians or sth

there is some sort of order or guild called the Lords of Fortune. they are treasurehunters, the order seems to be Rivaini in origin but like others can join?

also the first story features a Tevinter male mage (not magister) who is MLM

there’s a Qunari rank Bas-taar it means Keeper of Bas

Charter appears and she does gay pining for Tessa, twice

Sutherland and company appear and go on a mission. We get some insight into each of their pasts

Philliam, a Bard! appears. he argues with Genetivi

Varric as Viscount Tethras is mentioned

Kal-Sharok is mentioned

Cassandra is mentioned, seems to appear in Sidony’s flashback

Josephine is mentioned

we return to Skyhold as it is the setting for a story

more wiping out of Dalish groups fucks sake Bioware

a Rasaan is in it

Genetivi is in it

Dagna appears

Valya mentioned, doing new research into new weird darkspawn phenomena. and HOLY SHIT, the new darkspawn revelations in this book!!

the Antaam attacked without the permission of the rest of the Qunari govt

Sidony from DAMP is in it

without an army Antiva’s only line of defense against the Qunari is the Crows

Kirkwall’s events & boom referenced

Serault glass mirrors mentioned

House Danarius mentioned, a mage from the house was mentioned as having been up to something

a new type of demon I think, Regret. & the implication that there are spirits of Contemplation and Introspection. I think the Regret we see, “the regret of a god”, is Solas’ regret :S Sutherland and Co are dispatched to Skyhold to deal with it, it had like taken up residence in the deserted building or something. seems like all Solas’ regrets about what’s occurred and his choices like coalesced into this spirit (not literally but the spirit took the form because the feeling was so strong)

many cameo appearances from minor npcs who were Skyhold staffers

necromancers in Nevarra get skeletons to do their chores and its totally normal

there is an establishment called the Nug Queen

“hollix” means something like “irrepressible rascal” in old Tevene

no mention of live griffons from what I can see

Isseya is mis-spelled as Issenya

Quotes:

As though my good works were insufficient to draw compassionate spirits who might wish me protected, as though I were some common criminal binding spirits through blood magic, not the victim of the Dread Wolf himself! they returned with

[suicide pill entry] Her teeth clenched. Green foam started to fill her mouth. I dropped her to the ground and she started spasming, her legs drumming on the wooden deck. Her back arched once, twice, and then she was still. I knelt beside her and put my fingers to the side of her throat. Nothing. Dead. Damnit. “And that’s the other reason I didn’t join. Death before capture. Not my sort of thing at all.”

The words battered us like storm winds, and the Dread Wolf’s jaws closed upon the Tevinter mage, snapping him up in an instant as he screamed in terror. The lesser demons rushed down upon us, crackling with fire and lightning and our

us, and the demons that had accompanied the Dread Wolf burst into the world in righteous fury, shining warriors with blades forged from the raw fade itself and behind them, dimly visible through the crackling light, the shadow of the beast

“And now we know that the Dread Wolf has agents working for him,” the bard added, his mask glittering in the firelight as he tossed back his golden locks. “and that he has the power to kill those who oppose him as they sleep.”

“I act freely. For the Dread Wolf. To bring back what was once ours - what must be ours again.” Dread Wolf. Crap. I’d heard the rumors of course - dozens of elves, off to heed the call of some god. Guess I’d found one of them, at least. “The Qunari left sooner than I’d expected - their trail grew cold. But I had you. You found them for me.

All painted by Solas, the Inquisition’s expert on the Veil and the Fade beyond. It was his gift of record. At least, that’s what was claimed at the time. The rotunda they entered now was not fastidiously clean like the rest of Skyhold. The floor was

“Tevinter’s intelligence network declined to answer our request,” Charter said, “As did the Ben-Hassrath.” She grimaced. “The latter is especially disappointing. They had more knowledge of Solas’ movements than anyone else. They also”

“‘Solas’ is also not true.” “Pride,” said Laudine. “It means pride.” Rasaan stopped and cocked an eye. “Very good,” she said. Names were important to the Qunari. They were named for their roles, and roles defined their identities. Their actual

“Beyond that, the Inquisition knows little about what Solas intends. Much of his research involves the Veil that separates our world from the world of the spirits. He claimed to have created it, and he asked the Inquisition for help activating

A lone elf. My client. [...] The rune that she’d given me - she held it aloft, examining it critically. Muttering a single word over and over again.  “Felassan, Felassan, Felassan.” There was a hum, and the rune began to glow a steady and unpleasant red. I’d been around enough magic to know that was probably not a good thing.

“But you are now known to Fen’Harel. He has eyes everywhere. Inside Tevinter, without a doubt.” “So where should we go?” Irian asked quietly. She had moved closer, and was standing directly beside me.

The Fen’Harel question. How many lives had ended, seeking an answer? Four more, if our turn chasing a legend fails tonight. But we’ve dragged truth from the darkness beneath Tevinter, found pages that will guide

of those damned Fen'Harel cultists. 'Ooh, if we blow up enough people, ancient Elvhenan is definitely coming back.'” She caught my questioning glance. “They tried to recruit me a few years ago. I said no.” 

as the Avvar do. But whatever fear the name Dread Wolf carries, he has earned. While we might visit the Fade, it is his natural home, and the spirits there serve him gladly. They whisper in my dreams now, accusing me of crimes I never

the wolves. Each event that had shaped the Inquisition was being stripped of color.

The division of the mortal realm from the Fade was not a natural state that had always existed. It was an event, a moment in time that had literally shattered the elven empire. Pieces of that glory now drifted beyond dream and will, with the Dread Wolf stalking between. But other pieces remained, displaced in the physical world.

Elves are slim, but its their eyes and ears we recall. Humans have the most variety in the shoulders, and all anyone sees about qunari are height and horns

In our veins runs true Tevinter blood, passed down from the dreamers -

You all know that the Antaam invaded without permission of the other branches of Qunari government? We had assumed this would hobble them, but it appears the priests and workers were a moderating influence. Without them, the Antaam have crushed the Tevinter opposition in the east, and I fear everything east of Vyrantium will be under their control within a year, and northern Antiva as well.

The Inquisition had to be disbanded, they argued.. The Inquisition wasn’t the first army it had hosted. It would remain a distant beacon, so that all would remember when the Inquisitor had rallied the people of Thedas against a false god

He couldn’t be killed until his blighted dragon was dead, and the Herald had somehow countered with a dragon of their own. And there was a dragon on the panel, with an Inquisition blade in its neck. But according to the story

Every act of the Inquisitor recorded in masterful plaster and paint. From the explosion that had marked the Herald, to the triumph against a blighted false god

matter to her that Sidony wanted nothing to do with the fate of her home country? The Inquisitor does not want to see that happen to Nevarra. Or did it only matter that the Inquisitor was pleased?

The Inquisitor has taken a chance on his potential. But more than that, the Inquisitor had stood for him. Had stood for them all. Made them feel like they were worth it and could help. Made them look forward.

We bounced once, twice, jostling with the magical orb but it still held

Something huge trembled around us, a spirit so great that it shook parts of the Fade I had always considered to be neutral, devoid of life. - and high overhead, where the Black City shadowed the sky, I heard a great booming roar

So that’s what it was. “Supposed to be a piece of the Black City itself. ‘A reminder of man’s hubris, and of the unique and glorious divinity of the Maker’.” I snorted. “Seems like a bunch of nug shit to me.” “Regardless, the artifact has been stolen.

“Anything else?” “Whoever clips the Crows’ wings will walk by my side when we enter the Black City and take glory back for the Imperium.”

The Blight is over, or so it seems. Valya, a young elven mage recently recruited into the Wardens, has been tasked with studying the historical records of previous Blights in order to gain insight into newly reported, and disturbing, darkspawn phenomena. Her research into the

One of our best smiths has been studying red lyrium, and she says the blasted stuff is tainted by the Blight. A few families might’ve tried to keep smuggling it after that, but we shut that down. The Carta believes in business. Blight is bad for business.

So when this Dalish elf comes around asking can someone get the lyrium idol out of what’s left of the statue, our first thought was to send him back to his clan with a few new tattoos on his face, if you know what I mean. Plus, the idol is

“Or he could be a demon impersonating an elf,” the Mortalitasi said, sipping her wine. “What he does is not... especially Tevinter.” the Mortalitasi said with a sneer. “since most of it is built over where the ancient elves lived.”

“FROM THIS MOMENT, SHOULD YOU EVER BIND A SPIRIT, THEN YOUR LIFE IS MINE.” The hypocrisy almost made me laugh. The Dread Wolf forbade us from binding spirits, but why would these lesser demons attack us if not because the

but before the Tevinter mage could complete his ritual, the Dread Wolf arrived... burning eyes like a pride demon, and it came to us on wings of fire that resolved themselves into a horde of lesser demons as the Dread Wolf landed before us

The mark of the Pride demon, Audric realized. 

“I would caution you in dealing with those across the sea,” he said, “they are dangerous. “More dangerous than the elf who threatens the world?”

[lunarsaga]

EPISODE 1: Here Comes Trouble

[[HERE WE GO, BITCHES! Fanfic and Fanart combine to make some unholy mix of Time Consumption that will not leave me alone.

THE LUNAR SAGA, EPISODE 1, START!

Note: the text in the panels doesn't match the actual written portion of the fic ^^; I tried my best but I didn't wanna redraw all of this... ]]

===============

Kagome had been gone longer than she usually was, and Inuyasha was getting impatient.

They’d finally gotten their first lead on Naraku since his disappearance—that he was heading in the direction of the Ox and Tiger (Kagome called it “noh-rth-eest”?)—this was no time for her to be going back to her world! He tried to tell her that when she left, but she insisted that she was going home to bring back something that would help them.

She’d been gone for almost ten days now! What could possibly be taking so long?!

The half demon sat beside the well, seething as he waited for something to happen. He’d been at this pretty much constantly since the day after she left. He had half a mind to follow her down the well to her world and drag her back here; he’d done it before, he could do it again.

“Don’t you dare follow me!” Kagome had said before she left, “I might be gone a while, but I promise it’ll be worth it!”

“Ain’t worth it if we lose track of Naraku because you’re taking so long,” he growled to no one in particular. Obviously, he got no response from the dry well, so he stood up and raised his voice: “HURRY THE HELL UP, KAGOME!”

“Inuyasha?”

Inuyasha jumped from surprise when he saw Kagome hop up out of the well. She sat on the edge, smiling just softly. A little embarrassed that he was yelling at the well, Inuyasha folded his arms and cleared his throat.

“It’s about time you got back, Kagome,” he said. “What took you so damn long?!”

Kagome sighed, still smiling as she set her feet on the ground and stepped closer to him. “I told you, I had to get something. It took a second, but I said it’d be worth it, didn’t I?”

“I hope you’re right,” he snorted, “Because if Naraku gets away cos you took too long over there—”

He didn’t get to finish his thought. He hadn’t been paying attention to the well at all; usually, he wouldn’t have needed to. This time, he would definitely regret it. From the depths of the well came a voice he’d never heard before:

“HEADS UP!”

He didn’t even have time to wonder who the hell’s voice it was. Seconds later, something heavy flew out of the well and smacked him square in the face.

“WHAT THE HELL?!”

Kagome laughed nervously, holding her hands up, “Uh… that would be her.”

Anger boiling and holding his freshly bruised nose, Inuyasha shouted back at her: “WHO?!”

“Keep your pants on!” Came that same voice again. Inuyasha turned his attention back to the well as someone he’d never seen before pushed herself out of the well.

She dressed strangely—that was a given, she seemed to be from Kagome’s time—and carried a large, oddly-shaped bag on her back. She had thick waves of black hair, much longer than Kagome’s, but pretty much the same shade of jet black. Not only that, she seemed to resemble Kagome in a lot of ways, even if she looked much older. They had the same shape of face, the same nose, and the same round, brown eyes—although, if he looked close enough, he could see a strange pattern in this girl’s irises: little flecks of pale gold, asymmetrically surrounding her pupils.

Inuyasha was immediately on edge, his hand going instinctively for his sword hilt. Kagome saw, and shook her head, setting her hand on his arm.

“Relax, Inuyasha,” She said, “This is who I went back to get.”

“Sorry, did my bag getcha?” The girl asked as she hopped out of the well.

“Inuyasha,” Kagome continued, gesturing to the older girl, “Allow me to introduce you to my older sister. This is Luna.”

For a second, it didn’t set in. Inuyasha blinked once… twice… “Your… sister? You have a sister?!”

“She sure does,” the girl—Luna—stood tall, grinning and holding out her hand. As she did, she said something he didn’t understand. It sounded like weird gibberish. When she saw his face, she laughed and smacked her palm to her forehead. “Right, sorry. Still getting used to speaking Japanese more than I do English.”

Once again confused, Inuyasha just stared at her. “In-glesh?”

Luna nodded. “It’s the common language where I live.”

“Inuyasha, Luna lives in a different place than the rest of our family,” Kagome explained, “She lives in a country that’s across the ocean, called America.”

“A-mare-i-kah…” Inuyasha tried to say. “Sounds weird.”

“Oh it is, definitely.” Luna laughed, going to pick up her bag.

“Is that what took you so long?” Inuyasha asked Kagome, “You had to wait for her to travel across the ocean?”

“Didn’t take as long as you’d think, had to visit mom and gramps and Sota, too.” It was weird how casual this girl was about everything. “But I can explain why I’m here and where I’m from once we get to where we’re going, right?”

“Right,” Kagome agreed, smiling as she led her sister back toward Kaede’s village. “You gotta meet everyone else, too!”

“Looking forward to it.”

Inuyasha wasn’t sure how to process what the hell just happened. It was a lot of information in a very short amount of time, most of which he didn’t understand, and all of which he didn’t really like. He wasn’t sure how to feel about a new person joining their group, nevermind that he never knew Kagome had more family than the ones he’d met before. And the fact that she threw a heavy bag at his face certainly didn’t help. (Well… it was an accident, but still. It hurt.)

Well… at least Kagome was back, and the most important thing was that they could get on with their search for Naraku.

~ ~ ~

Alright, time to back up a little bit.

Now, there may have been a reason why Kagome didn’t really mention her sister. Part of it might have been that it would be hard to explain that her sister lived on another continent, but another part might have been that it would be even harder to explain why. And the reason it would be so hard to explain—for Kagome specifically—would be because of their father.

Now, the Higurashi family had quite a long history of shrine keepers, priests, and priestesses, dating back several hundred years. Along with that lineage came a propensity for spiritual magic and a connection to the supernatural, as well as the metaphysical, and Keiichirou Higarashi—father to Kagome, Luna, and Sota— was no exception. However, he had bigger dreams than shrine-keeping.

A bit of a rebel, Keiichirou spent some time in America during High School as a part of an exchange program. It was there, through the family that hosted him, that he found a world that he never would have imagined.

The underground world of Supernatural Monster Hunters.

He spent his high school years in America learning all about it: how to fight and protect people against different monsters, some of them like the ones his father told him stories of growing up. When he returned home, he declared that he’d found his calling, and when he could finally afford to, he would move to America to follow it.

His father worried about the fate of the Higurashi Shrine if his only child were to abandon their family’s legacy. Keiichirou wouldn’t back down, but found when he returned home, that the Hunting world extended even to Japan—not quite to the extent that it was in the States, but he could still find a middle ground between what he wanted and what his father did.

And in the interim, he fell in love and married a wonderful woman named Mei, who accepted his weird, secret world wholeheartedly.

The Higurashis’ first child was born on the first day of November, during a very full Harvest Moon. When she opened her eyes for the first time, the doctor immediately diagnosed her with partial Heterochromia; her hazel-brown eyes were speckled with gold just around her irises, making it look like she had little crescent moons in her eyes. Keiichirou chose her name for these reasons; he’d heard it when he was in America, a name that meant “moon”. Luna.

It was seven years until their next child came into the world: Kagome, named for the eight-pointed star Mei saw on her chest after she was born. Keiichirou was excited when he heard about that; he said that both of his girls had special gifts, and hoped they would one day do amazing things with them.

But another six years passed… and things weren’t so happy in the Higurashi house. Keiichirou had already started teaching Luna about the Supernatural world, where Mei thought she was too young. Keiichirou had grown weary over the years, still longing to go back to America, where the Hunter culture was strongest.

When Luna was thirteen, Kagome six, and Sota only a newborn, their parents separated.

Luna was old enough at that point, that her parents let her decide where she wanted to be. Enthralled by the idea of being a Hunter, she wanted to follow her father, even if it meant leaving the rest of her family.

Travel between the two countries was difficult; Luna was lucky if she saw her little sister and brother once a year. But they kept in touch as much as they could: by letter, by email, and a phone call every once in a while.

Then, just four years after he and Luna left Japan, Keiichirou passed away very suddenly of an illness. Despite her family’s insistence that she come back and live in Japan, Luna remained in her father’s house. She knew, by then, that she was too far into the Hunter world to leave; not to mention that she had Alice (an old family friend, let’s say for now), who had been helping take care of her anyway. So she stayed in America, as five more years went by.

She hadn’t talked to her sister in months, when she got a call from her out of the blue:

“Hey Luna, um… So, I’ve got quite the story to tell you…”

~ ~ ~

So here she was, Luna Higurashi, a 22-year-old American Monster Hunter, standing 500-ish years in the past, explaining herself to a half-dog-demon, a kitsune, a nekomata, a Demon Slayer, and a Buddhist Monk. All of whom were extremely surprised to find that Kagome had a sister.

“Nice to get to meet you all,” She said, “Kagome told me all about your adventures. She brought me here to help you get rid of that Naraku guy.”

“Kagome never told us she had a sister!” The little kitsune—Shippo—piped up first.

“So I’ve heard,” Luna chuckled, crossing her arms.

Sango, the Demon Slayer, looked rather interested in the guitar case Luna was carrying on her back. “You mentioned you were a Slayer too? That must be an impressive weapon you’re carrying.”

“Huh? Oh, no,” Luna shook her head, tugging on the strap. “This is just my guitar. It’s a musical instrument—all my weapons are in my duffel bag.”

While her attention was on Sango, Luna failed to notice the monk approaching her until he took her hand in his. “A demon slayer and a musician! To think Kagome never told us she had such a beautiful and accomplished sister.”

Luna just stared at him, but she could feel the tension rising from the Slayer next to her. It was like standing next to a crackling thunderstorm with lightning bolts ready to strike. But she had nothing to worry about, Luna wasn’t about to fall for it.

“Never did mention me, huh?” She reversed the gentle grip Miroku had on her hand, grabbed his wrist, and twisted it sideways; a warning. “But she did tell me about you. And if you value your hands, you’ll keep them to yourself.”

Miroku laughed nervously, “Ahahaha—ow! Th-there’s no need to be rash! I meant nothing by it!”

The thunderstorm was gone. Sango was smirking as Luna let the monk go. “Oh, I like her.”

Kagome sighed, shook her head and smiled. “Welcome to the group, sis.”

[youcantkillamutant]

Earn It

Author: youcantkillamutant

Fandom: Marvel (Black Panther)

Pairing: Erik Stevens/Killmonger x Black!OC

Summary:  Some things have to be earned

Warnings: Cursing (Is ‘hell’ a bad word anymore?)

Words: 1.6K

A/N: Joining in on the Quarantine Writing challenge hosted by the lovely @shaekingshitup & @chaneajoyyy. Thank y’all for getting me writing in this time of corn teen lol. I only own my original characters of course, Marvel don’t sue me I’m broke.

Listening To: Earned It Instrumental By The Weeknd, Earned It by Jasmine Thompson, When I Get My Hands On You by The New Basement Tapes

_______________________________________________________________________

Tea, check. KimoyoPad, check. Earbuds, check. Blue-light glasses, check. Kay had everything she needed. The sun was streaming through her office pod in the palace, window open to let in the breeze, but something was missing. Ideas. She needed ideas. After working on this project for a week straight, Kay discovered that she had no more inventive energy. All of her creations had been wrung out of her within the week, and now she sat at her desk, pouring over everything she had imagined, and it just wasn’t working.

She’d bought a few more hours to pull something together to present to Shuri and the board, but the clock was ticking and she wasn’t getting anywhere. Kay pushed away her KPad. Seeking out distraction would only make her feel worse, only remind her of the work she wasn’t doing.

To be fair, Kay had been particularly hard on herself during the work on this project and she knew it. Shuri and the other girls in the lab had noticed it. Feared it is probably more accurate. when Kay asked Shuri for a few more hours on the presentation, she was met with wide eyes and furious nods. And Kay couldn’t figure out why exactly she was wound so tight about this, but it felt important.

It was her first presentation in Wakanda that she’d make without training wheels. No project lead to report to, just her. When Shuri and the Board had approved her initial proposal, she’d been elated. Called everyone back home in the States to report that after 8 whole months working in Wakanda she’d finally scored her own project. It was exciting, even when the work set in she was excited, but now, a month later and three-quarters a preliminary presentation complete, Kay had to wonder why she’d wanted to do this in the first place.

It wasn’t like she had a ton of work to finish for the presentation anyways. But the part she had to finish just wouldn’t come. She’d been brainstorming for the last week on this portion of the project and she could barely string two sentences together for the presentation because there was nothing. Just as Kay was about to go give herself a bathroom break in which she would stare at herself in the mirror for ten to fifteen minutes, the door to her office pod slid open. Crap.

“Shuri, I thought we agreed that you’d give me at least three hours to go over these—”, Kay stopped short when her earbuds were out. A warm breath brushed over Kay’s shoulder, she knew it wasn’t Shuri. Great.

“N’Jadaka. I thought you were on a diplomatic mission with the Jabari.” Clove and honey floated to her senses, mingling with sand and oak; N’Jadaka’s scent wafting through the air.

“Keeping tabs on me Kay? I’m touched.” He huffed another breath over Kayana’s cheek, so close he could kiss it. Kay didn’t bother answering. Blowing out a breath instead, so get N’Jadaka’s smell out of her mouth.

Ever since she’d come to Wakanda N’Jadaka had been…overly familiar. Maybe it’s because they were the only Americans in Wakanda, but Kay didn’t spend five years doubling majoring in architecture and agriculture to be distracted by a lost prince. especially not on her first big presentation.

“Don’t flatter yourself N’Jadaka. I read the daily news blasts.” Kay waved her right wrist, heavy and strong with the kimoyo beads she’d received her first week working with Shuri.

“Everything is easier with these, I promise! It’s synced with your Pad so you’ll never have to worry about lost files. You’ll be able to chat with me, send video messages about the site visits and…”

“She reads! I knew you were smart. Could tell by the way you—” Kay shot him a sharp look then, one brow raised, daring him to go on.

Around Kayana, N’Jadaka Udaku had a knack for saying the wrong thing. Well in her opinion. All the girls she worked with in the lab and in the field utterly adored the man, but to Kay he was a pompous, arrogant, admittedly smart but incredibly irritating Golden State Warriors fan. Another glance at Kay told Erik to move onto another subject.

“I thought I told you to call me Erik?”

“I thought I told you to call me Ms. Benton.” Another gust of air, this one followed by a kiss of his teeth. Kay could just barely see it in her periphery. Pink tongue caressing his pearly whites before being swallowed by gleaming gold canines.

“Fine Ms. Benton. What are you working on then, Girl Wonder?”

“That’s your cousin’s name.” Erik rounded the table and pulled a chair out smoothly, settling into it and gazing at her expectantly. “I’m working on the proofs for a few smaller eco-house concepts. We’ve got the ecology of it down, solar panels, self venting spaces, and recycled fibers are easy enough to incorporate, but it’s just the…size.”

“What about it?” Kay ignored the way her stomach flipped when N’Jadaka’s face scrunched together in confusion. She’d been doing that for weeks.

“Do you know how difficult it is to turn a 20 meter space into a fully functioning apartment? I mean, sleeping quarters, laundry, kitchen, and living area. Not to mention it should all be ‘mod-chic’ or whatever brief T’Challa gave to the Board. Shuri was supposed to send someone from product development to help me but—” Kay caught sight of Erik’s grin. Her stomach flipped again and she backpedalled. “But I’m sure I can handle this. I probably don’t need help anyways.”

“Now come on Ms. Benton, you were practically begging for help.”

“I can’t imagine why Shuri would send you.” Any time the two had to work in the same vicinity, Erik spent most of his time trying to distract her and no time on whatever it was he was meant to be doing. After her first week, she’d actually never seen Erik in the lab again. According to Shuri, he wasn’t allowed in anymore.

“I’m the last one to say men and women should be separated, but my cousin…well he’s not helped his case much. Besides, T’Challa’s been gunning for his own lab near the top of the palace, this’ll make things easier for everyone. For now at least.”

N’Jadaka had found his way to Kay outside of the lab; sliding into the seat across from her at lunches, and always suspiciously on her off-site trips, trying to play tour guide. Initially she felt annoyed, she didn’t need a tour guide to do her job. Now-a-days, she was feeling a little different anytime N’Jadaka found her. He was getting to her, as much as she hates to admit it.

“Because I’m probably the only person who’s lived in a 20 meter apartment in this country. Seriously, I know how to live small Kay.” Kayana shot him a glare for the nickname and tried to ignore how genuine he sounded. Erik smirked at the way her lip curled in annoyance. He’d always found that cute.

Kay wasn’t stupid, she’d heard the stories about King N’Jadaka. Ruthless, power-hungry, practically foaming at the mouth for control. It was why she’d avoided him in the first place. But this N’Jadaka was nothing like the stories. He was kind of nice. Still cocky and arrogant, but surprisingly sincere. At least he was with her.

“The key to this is to break up the space. That and you’ve got to use any and every piece of furniture as storage. Hell, use the space under the steps as storage. If something in the space doesn’t have at least two functions, it doesn’t belong.”

For the first time since she’d started working in Wakanda, Erik had brought something useful to the conversation. Not that he wasn’t smart, the guy was brilliant and everyone knew it, especially him. It just seemed that every time he came around Kay, all he could spew were cocky remarks and nicknames he hadn’t earned.

“Are you telling me you’ve found more than one use for a pillow?”

“Ms. Benton, there are plenty of uses for a pillow.” Erik waggled his eyebrows and Kay rolled her eyes, but something in his expression felt wicked and her face heated. “But in all seriousness, yeah. If you get a large enough pillow, they can be used as couch cushions. Hell you could turn the whole bed into a couch and transform the sleeping space into the living space.”

“Do you think we could turn them into curtains instead?”  

It went on like that for two hours, Kay and Erik brainstorming. Mostly Kay was questioning how something could serve more than one function and Erik answered back with three different ways to transform the singly-functional to multi-functional.

“I’m impressed.” Kay was loathe to admit it, especially with the way Erik’s full lips pulled up into a smirk. By now they were both standing, they’d both paced the circumference of the office pod ten times. N’Jadaka approached Kay arms wide in victory.

“And the Girl Wonder begrudgingly admits I know what I’m talking about. You flatter me Kay.”

“Ms. Benton. And I never said you didn’t know that you were talking about.” At least not out loud.

“Seriously? After all that help I still can’t call you Kay?” This time N’Jadaka was a few steps away. “What is it with you and nicknames?” His gaze was calculating and Kay met him head-on.

“Names have power, you of all people should know that N’Jadaka.”

“Bullshit.” N’Jadaka took a step closer. “I’ve heard the girls call you Kay.” Another step. “You even let mean old Mrs. Oyinke call you Kay.” N’Jadaka had made it right in front of Kay, close enough to touch. Kay stood her ground.

“Nicknames have to be earned.” Erik’s brow shot up in surprise. Then he leaned in. Close and closer. Between one breath and the next he was so close that Kay could see his golds glinting through barely parted lips.

“And what exactly do I need to do to earn it then?”

_______________________________________________________________________

A/N: Hi everyone! I hope y’all are doing okay in Quarantine and staying safe. I obvi haven’t been writing much, but I’m hoping to change that once I finish a few more projects. 

I started a new job last month and somehow get to work from home so there’s really no reason why I can’t keep working on The Advocate after I fix a few things around the house. I’m excited about that! 

I hope y’all liked this one. Pretty sure I’ll never write smut but I like to tease the possibility of the chance of a kiss like an 80 year old victorian spinster lol

I was inspired by the Youtube channel Never Too Small. Even if y’all aren’t into design you should check out a few videos because what people can do with small spaces is literally ingenious!

_______________________________________________________________________

Let me know if you’d like to be added or taken off the taglist :)

Taglist: @princessstevens @muse-of-mbaku @k-michaelis@queenamaniii@dreadedphilosphy@killmongurl@thelovelyliterary@elaindeereads @thedom223 @muse-of-mbaku@bidibidibombaclaat@panthergoddessbast @writingmarvellousimagines@someareblindtoitsbeauty@jozigrrl@iamrheaspeaks @purple-apricots@thadelightfulone@janelledarling @killmongersgurl @fd-writes 

[spookyboogie3]

MY FAVORITE AH MOMENTS W/O R*an H*yw**d

Also keep in mind some of these moments i picked Bitch Face r*an may have been present for but this aint about his stupid ass. 

The straw bit on Off Topic

Fiona and Trevor’s “Look at us” “Look at us” “Look at us” in TTT

Drunk Jeremy inhaling helium, followed by Jack and Trevor on Off Topic

“Krusty KrAYAYAB!!!” TTT

Jeremy trying to slam his face through a table, followed by Michael doing the same thing

“my god…… the munchdew” “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!” Minecraft: Skyfactory

Actually all of Simple Farmer Geoff from Skyfactory

Whatever those sounds were that Jack was making in the beginning of GTA video

Alfredo screaming as he continues to fall down a steep tube in a GTA race

DESTROYING THEIR OFFICE DEAR LORD

“How did he drown though?” “UNDERWATER, MATT!”

Anytime Fiona starts to RAGE in TTT (bonus if others join in)

The time Gav was the phantom in TTT and he kept dying and being brought back and Jack spitting water and then trying to catch it

Alfredo’s Magoo moments in Minecraft

Geoff laughing in the background of a video hes not in

Lindsay fucking around with Chef Mike on Harecore Minigolf

Lindsay fucking around in general

Gavin and Fiona playing Animal Crossing and laughing at the stupidest shit

The Fish Tempura incident on Wheel of Fortune

Lindsay’s reasoning for why her and Michael should have 4 kids

Geoff’s fucking ad reads (my favorite is 23&Me)

The whole thing during Push the Button where everyone especially Michael gets mad at Fiona because she said the best candy to get while trick or treating was lollipops

Matt’s fucking desk in the corner of the room

Anytime Millie is in a video

Everyone falling off the pink ladder during TTT and dying repeatedly because of it

Alfredo “the two-time champ” Diaz dying very early in YDYD 3

Gavin and Michael fucking up almost every game they play on Play Pals

RAY OR NO and then RAY OR NAY on Off Topic

Reddit Roasts Geoff

Gavin asking if someone could kill 20 cows with their bare hands and the proceeding so say he could rip out a cow’s veins by reaching into its neck

Ify’s narration during Let’s Roll Ave Caesar

The internet losing its shit when Jeremy shaved his head years ago

“We need a knife” Gavin comes back with a hammer

Griffin chain sawing the Off Topic table up

“How do I put the boat in the water??” “Right click you animal”

As of 2020, 8 years of playing Minecraft, certain people still do not know how to play the basics of this fucking game.

Honestly it took over 200 episodes for some of them to figure out how the compass worked. You know after they decided that the sun was setting in the wrong direction. (this was in 2016??)

Flynt coal still is a joke they make

So is Day 2

Whatever happened in that GTA lets play where someone called a mugger or a hit on someone and the game glitched and 50 guys showed up and lined up on the street below from where they were playing

Anytime Gavin gets mugged, it’s an old running gag but it’s a classic

The time a mugger fucking started driving the fire truck away after mugging Gavin with Michael and Jeremy still in the truck thinking the other is driving and it takes them like 2 minutes to realize what happened while Gavin’s yelling “come back”

They got a water jug and immediately started water boarding each other

“It pinged and went dingle”

“Hey Trey-Boi” “Hey Gay-Boi” Immediately realizes what he has said

Jeremy’s website puns

(OLD) Ray jerking off in the corner during a let’s play

(OLD) the world in Minecraft never loading and everyone screaming about as Geoff says its fine for him

Jeremy’s “I AM MONSTER TRUCK”

Jack taking AH to Disney……in Minecraft

On Twitter, Gavin asked about recommendations for a computer mouse and Fiona starts sending him pictures of actual mice.

“Its not ghey, if its on the moon”

Literally anything Fiona does as Po

Jeremy saying the heterosexual flag is boring

UNO THE MOVIE!

Geoff fucking cackling the whole time.

“here’s looking at you kid”

the video was almost 3 hours long

“you know what my favorite color is? blue” “oh really? You know what my favorite hand is? Yours

They all want it to end but no one wants to lose and so they fuck each other and that prolongs the game. Also they put on more rules, so they just keep getting more cards if they don’t have a card to match the previous

Alfredo saying he won’t participate in ghost hunter because he knows what happens to people of color in horror movies

Fiona walking in on Off Topic with a protein shake and Gavin asks if shes drinking milk and she says without missing a beat “ah no that’s cum” and everyone laughed not expecting the answer

(OLD) “SURPRISE MOTHERFUCKER” *falls in hole*

(OLD) Ray and Gav running in a panel dressed as X-Ray and Vav and Ray running the whole way around the room before he got to the stage

Duck taping Jeremy to the wall

(OLD) All of Minecraft Episode 3 Plan G (This was the very first AH video I watch and why I know who they are)

Geoff and Gav creating Achievement City and giving everyone houses just to prank Jack into burning house down with lava.

Ray’s house is a dirt block with no furniture and single torch

Geoff’s giant ass house next to Ray’s tiny house

Jack tries to destroy everything with lava throughout the episode

“lets be honest, I realistically didn’t lose anything”

Michael stealing art from Gav’s house “NOO! I want nice things”

The sign to Michael’s says “Awaiting Approval, Awaiting Approval, Awaiting Approval” he runs into house and say “I’m home”

Ray also steals this sign at some point

Plan G – The failsafe.

“Oh whats this? Is this a button? Whats this? (pushes button) Yeah it was a button”

“Did you push the button?”

“Yeah”

“okay”

“wh-what does it do?”

“uh…”

Cue Achievement City beginning to explode as Michael starts screaming

Rays reaction “NO, MY SHITTY HOUSE JUST GOT EVEN SHITTIER!”

Not something funny but something VERY IMPORTANT. AH admitting that they all fucked up and how shitty their behavior was when dealing with harassment in the fanbase. People were racist, sexist, homophobic, misogynistic, and just downright horrible to a lot of the employees at RT and AH. This came up after Mica Burton left the company and talked about it publicly and how nothing was done about it. Fiona who also experiences these same things, along with Lindsay and other employees, but Fiona took the charge on the Off Topic talking about people can’t continue to get away with that behavior. She got to sound off her feelings to a group of white men who all respected her and LISTENED to what was saying and how she felt. She cried; Geoff cried. They all want to do more, so this doesn’t happen in the future and they’re not tolerating the racist and horrible comments. AH taking a mature moment to talk about how they failed to stop these comments and Geoff was right when he said the company has a long way to go.

 Outside of AH each member has more to them than just all of the comedy and laughs and dumb shit they do

Geoff helped found Roosterteeth and Achievement Hunter. He has a beautiful daughter in Millie who is awesome in her own right. He’s a recovering alcoholic. Currently doing F**k Face podcasts. Was in the fucking army. Takes accountability for every mistake he makes.  

Jack also helped start Achievement Hunter. He does so much work for charity. His twitter is full of things to help people go vote. He’s like the dad to AH, especially Fiona. He’s happily married to his wife Caiti.

Michael was an electrician and has a lot of handy man experience. He made a few videos online about him raging at games and that got the attention of RT. He’s currently married to Lindsay who he met because of RT. They have two kids together.

Gavin is an expert at high speed filmmaking and know how use and edit footage from a slow-motion camera. He has worked on actual films. One of the creators of the Slow Mo Guys. Worked his ass off to get to work for RT. Currently dating model and cosplayer Meg Turney

Lindsay flips between being the mom of the group and a complete chaos queen and we all love her for it. She started as an editor for the RT podcast and then AH stuff. She is an incredible voice actor, most known for Ruby Rose (RWBY), Space Kid (Camp Camp), Hilda (Xray & Vav) just to name a few. She also has a degree in finance

Jeremy started as a fan who made videos on the community page. He took over Ray’s place after Ray left to do Twitch full time. He is a self-published author and a skilled rapper and singer. He’s currently married to his wife, Kat.

Matt also started as a fan making videos on the community page. He actually interacted and made stuff for the guys in really early Minecraft episodes. Seriously this guy is like king of Minecraft. He has a degree in electrical engineering. He also has pretty decent singing voice.

Trevor is THE BOSS. Has a degree in aero-space engineering and is getting paid to babysit AH. Currently dating Barbara Dunkelman, RTs queen of puns.

Alfredo worked at IGN before RT and is a well-known streamer. He is the best when it comes to first person shooter games. He and Trevor look so similar.

Fiona. Po. Her majesty. Host of This Just Internet. A Twitch streamer. Baby of the bunch. Grew up in Europe. Her and Gav act like a pair of siblings. She has stated and showed time and time again she will fight for people to have safe spaces for anyone who needs them.

Ify, our new guy. He is wonderful and I want to stay forever. He’s a comedian, a writer, and an actor. Co hosts F-ing Around with Fiona. Has his own film podcast, Who Shot Ya? I look forward to more content with him in it, cause everything he’s been in so far has been great.

 Were all hurting but well make it through this

We have all these wonderful moments and a lot more that I didn’t list and this incredible team of personalities with their own accomplishments and achievements. Not to mention old team members who were also great additions and the entire crew behind the scenes editing and making videos look the best that they can.

 Here’s to Achievement Hunter and to this community. We need to be here for each other in times like these.

@theonyxranger gave me the idea for this based on their own post they made about the fans giving their favorite moments without bitch face and there were just too many. Oop. 

[lizacstuff]

Bunch of anons about Carina and Roswell NM drama

Under the cut because it’s long and gossipy...

Anonymous said: Whatever nonsense Carina may have been up to with Jeanine and Nathan, both the leads have seemed to keep their private issues to themselves by not telling other cast or friends. That's why it angers me that the person who leaked the information disregarded Jeanine as a person and victim.

I’m of two minds on this.  On one hand I totally agree and I hate that Jeanine’s name was drug into this and her involvement was shared by the multiple inside sources, but on the other hand I do not like Carina, I think she was awful to work for, and I think it’s a good thing if it’s know in the industry that she created friction on set and was investigated by HR.  

She was so unprofessional, just from what we could see as fans, that she should NOT be put in charge of another show any time soon. So I think for the sake of people she will work with in the future, it’s a good thing it’s out there.  She has a whole lot of growing to do before she should ever work in television again. 

You make a good point about Jeanine and Nathan keeping their business to themselves.  Carina is out there over-sharing constantly, putting every neurosis on full display, and forcing half the cast to be out drinking and entertaining her on a regular basis. While those two, kept quiet and out of the spotlight. In interviews/panels they’ve both been completely professional, doing their jobs while also being charming, funny and eloquent.  

It was obvious to those of us watching closely that all was not well between J/N and Carina when the season started shooting. Carina was bitchier when she talked about them and those characters than she had been before, and J/N were nowhere to be seen in her braggy out-partyin’-with-my-cast IG stories and posts.  

As you say, it doesn’t look like J/N tried to drag any other cast or crew into whatever the issue was. I’m not sure the same can be said for Carina, that speaks volumes about the character of all involved. 

Anonymous said: I saw that abnormallyadam is doing a live social media thing with Jeanine and Vlamis soon. I guess we might get more information then and if Jeanine decides to say anything.

How hilarious would it be if Adam gets the scoop of a lifetime!?

I’m guessing this chat or whatever it is was set up before Jeanine and Vlamis knew the studio was going to swoop in and make their lives a whole lot better by firing Carina. So it will be interesting to see if it still happens on schedule or if it’s postponed for awhile.  

If it does go on, I think they will probably cover it really quickly and superficially like Vlamis did when he was schilling his merch the other night and then move on.  They won’t deep dive into it, that’s for sure. 

Anonymous said: Carina has been tweeting incessantly today! Like tweeting about other meaningless things won't make people forget lol. Also about that anon message you received about unfollowing nathan - wowwww she used to be up his butt.

Yes, remember the days when Carina used him as her social media crutch (every post she makes like that with a hot actor or country singer is basically her rampant insecurities saying: “hey look at the hot guy(s) who hang out with me and take pictures with me, it means I have value ya’ll!”) before she moved onto Trevino and then Vlamis.  So sad.   

They were clearly friends after The Originals and she invited him to audition.  I’m glad she did, he’s great in the role. Although it sounds like he was lucky that the President of the CW saw him and told her he was a leading man, since she didn’t see him as a lead. Sometime a friend’s preconceived notions might actually hold a person back... 

Who knows what happened, but just knowing human nature and Carina’s energy, I’ve always wondered if she thought she was going to have her friend on set and he was gonna be her social crutch, her go-to to entertain her and party with her, but right off the bat he and Jeanine got together so during the first season filming he wasn’t so much interested in the single, going-out partying lifestyle that she’s clearly addicted to and that rankled her a bit. Perhaps she lost her party buddy to her leading lady, and the loss of that attention “displeased” her. (to quote Kamran who said Carina told the writers to punish actors who displeased her by reducing their screen time. Interesting thought, no?)

Anonymous said: Well the interesting thing is some of the other people she follows don't post much either and she continues to follow them. Interesting interesting.

I know. She didn’t unfollow him because of that. That was definitely a show of cutting ties with him. It was probably in a fit of rage because she can’t unfollow Jeanine (because that would look terrible).  Also she has been so humiliated between being unceremoniously fired and losing her development deal with WB, the Hollywood Reporter article making her look terrible, and that writer spilling tea, that my guess is she’s hoping to shift focus to someone else and she knows unfollowing him will make us all wonder why. 

Anonymous said: Well shoot, maybe it was Nathan and not Jeanine who went to hr? And Carina found out? Or Nathan took the fall? Sorry I'm just going down a rabbit hole of conspiracy.

In my opinion there’s no reason to think those sources got it wrong. I would guess that Jeanine was involved, but that doesn’t mean it didn’t also involve Nathan.  Those two are a self-professed team, so no reason to think they wouldn't be in this instance as well. 

Anonymous said: Does this mean she'll unfollow Jeanine too??

I’m sure she wants to, but she can’t unless she wants to confirm that, yes, there was friction on the set and, yes, there was a specific problem with her leading lady.

Carina went out of her way to try and combat the “rumors” about her and Jeanine not getting along, addressing the situation in her goodbye post-- drawing more attention to it in the process-- so unfollowing her now would just make her look foolish and like everything she said was a lie and everything from the inside sources is true.  

Anonymous said: Carina will definitely do something stupid. She can't help herself. But even though there's no reason to follow Nathan, he's been inactive on Twitter for over a year and for her to unfriend now during this drama and mess...how is that a coincidence?

As I said above, I know it’s not a coincidence.  She’s dumb because by doing that she pretty much confirmed that there was friction on the set.  If there wasn’t, she wouldn’t be unfollowing the person in the main cast who she was closest too prior to the show. 

Part of me wonders if, as an old friend, she asked him for something (to defend her or a show of support) and he wouldn't do it.  Perhaps she’s most hurt by him not supporting her since they were friends before and she did give him a lead role on a network show (and also accidentally introduced him to his girlfriend.)  Maybe she thought he owed her and he didn't step up to defend her or even just give a tacit show of support by responding to her social media posts on leaving??

I’m guessing if he had come out of social media hibernation to give her one of those paltry “Thanks for everything” responses to her IG post like the other actors she wouldn't have unfollowed him. 

Anonymous said: Someone said the writer deleted all his tweets about Carina.

Not surprising, it was a crazy spree he was on, who wants to bet that he got contacted by a lawyer late Friday night?

I’m sure Carina was doing everything in her power to threatened him and to get him to stop. 

Anonymous said: I remember the writer also referring to Nathan as Carina's "friend." Is it in quotations because they are not actually friends? Frenemy? Carina was recently saying nice things about Nathan so based on her perspective, she thinks they were still on good terms?

Well they were apparently friends before he was cast, what happened after that is hard to say. They seemed fine during the promotion of season 1, but as soon as season 2 started filming, Carina’s tone when talking about him and Max got ugly and Nathan and Jeanine were staying far away from her socially. I mean Jeanine hosted a ladies Friendsgiving at their house, where 40 women from the cast and crew came over for a Thanksgiving feast, but the female showrunner wasn’t there. Hmmmm...

However, this spring things seemed to have thawed a bit.  Jeanine and Carina would occasionally like each other’s IG post (someone pointed out to me that had stopped during summer of 2019 and they didn’t engage with each other’s posts much if at all during S2 filming) Jeanine and Carina did that IG live and Carina was talking positively about Nathan and Max and seemed to be setting him up for a big season 3 with the dual roles and talking excitedly about that, so honestly, to me, it seemed like they had made their peace.  Perhaps Carina getting fired (and the straw that broke the camel’s back on that was clearly her idiotic tirade against the UK distributor) brought back up all the issues??? Or maybe Carina blamed them because of the prior issues? Or maybe they didn’t support her with the studio when she was trying to salvage her job? All I know is that Carina’s public behavior on social media is enough grounds to fire her, so she has no business blaming anyone but herself. 

Anonymous said: Someone said to the writer that jeanine, amber and nathan are staying silent on the matter and kamran replied that "Silence speaks louder than words." just above that they also were wondering who Carina harassed and bullied into silence? was it nathan?

Who knows... ask the writer. 

Anonymous said: Carina going from Zapit straight to writing for TVD is peak white privilege. After that THR article you could tell she believed a little too much how far that privilege would get her. Good riddance. Good luck getting another job for being such a big liability. I don't see any corporation hiring her again.

I think the only way she’s getting another job in TV anytime soon is if Julie gives it to her. She’s talented, once she grows up maybe she’ll be capable of running a show, but it was clear from the peanut gallery she should never have been given that amount of responsibility that she had on RNM. 

[kweebtrash]

Why Stop Now (M)

Pairing:  JohnnyxYutaxReader

Genre: PWP, One Shot, College Au (barely)

Summary: I literally just wanted to write about getting DP’d hardcore with my bias and wrecker. that’s it. It’s just fucking, short and sweet

Word Count: 4.2k

Features:  blowjob, anal fingering, vaginal fingering, anal, squirting, grinding, a smidge of public sex, a little bit of overstretching, 

A/N: Probs will edit some more later like tomorrow when I’m not so tired.

MasterlIst  Buy me a Ko-Fi    

It was a mistake coming here tonight. I didn’t want to be surrounded by a house full of idiots but I most certainly didn't want to run into my ex. Lucas was currently the bane of my existence after I caught him cheating on me at a party similar to this. The moment I saw him I took to drinking my sorrows away in order to forget. I hoped I looked good enough to ever make him regret being the world's biggest asshole to me. The unfortunate part was that I hadn't really eaten much for a good part of the day and the alcohol hit me harder than I wanted it to. I slowed down and worked through clusters of people to head upstairs and rest in Taeyong's bedroom. I hoped it wasnt occupied with a fucking couple as I didn't need war flashbacks to top off my already sour mood. His room was thankfully barren and I closed the door and set the lock.

The bed looked perfect for me to just take a quiet nap and I shuffled slowly to the mattress before throwing myself across it. I wanted my head to stop spinning a bit so I could start making good decisions. Once I was a bit more sober I would head home instead of wallowing in misery and chatting with guys I had slept with in the past. Almost the entirety of my track record was in attendance here which was the cherry on top of my clusterfuck sundae. There was Taeil from my college writing class, Taeyong, the host of the party, from my media class, Jaehyun from the Student Democrats club, and I was sure my most frequent suitors, Johnny and Yuta were floating around somewhere. All in all I was making mistake after mistake in the grand scheme of things.

I shut my eyes and tried to focus on sleep but the music was still too loud even through the closed door and I could hear voices pouring in from the open window. Those voices sounded way too familiar and I winced the moment I recognized them. I hoped to all hell they didn't notice me in the room as they were sitting on the mid roof right outside of Taeyong's bedroom. I curled up and tried to stay as quiet as possible but my plan failed entirely when I heard my name called out in a weed induced slur.

"Heyyyy baby! What are you doing here?!" Yuta giggled.

"Fuck I haven't seen you in forever!" Johnny added.

I grumbled and squeezed my eyes tighter. "Leave me alone. I hit the bottle too hard and I need to sleep it off for a bit."

"Ooh did you see Lucas downstairs? Is that it?" Yuta asked.

I stayed quiet, refusing to answer. 

"Yup," Johnny said. "Definitely saw Lucas. Come here babe. We'll help you get your mind off it."

"Absolutely not." I said, finally sitting up. "You two are the worst trouble makers of them all. I don't need you trying to play games tonight."

"When have we ever played games?!" Yuta took a long drag from the joint he and Johnny had been sharing. 

"Hmm, let's see, leaving me on read, ghosting me, dumping me out of your room after we were done fucking, being complete fuckboys. The list goes on, truly."

"We're not that bad! Besides...you always come back for more, don't you?" Johnny smirked.

My face flared up instantly at his truth filled statement. Little fucker. "Be quiet." I snapped. "That's not the point."

"Yeah, your point should be coming out here and joining us. The breeze is much better up here and it's not as hot as it is in the house."

Yuta was right. The summer weather had been unforgiving especially when a couple dozen people were crammed in a small two story house. The breeze was coming in nicely through the windows and I contemplated actually going out there in hopes that the air would help clear my head.. I sighed and used the bed for leverage to crawl out the window and sit on the roof area. Yuta passed the blunt to Johnny and I laid back against the paneling, staring down at the mess of people on the lawn.

"We've been people watching all night. That dude on the left has been trying to get in this chicks pants for like an hour now. It ain't gonna happen." Johnny laughed.

"Hmm, he doesn't look like he's got game. I wouldn't sleep with him."

"What he's not your type? I thought you liked big dumb idiots?"

"I mean that's why I fucked you, didn't I?" I smirked at Johnny who glared at me.

Yuta snorted and laid back with me, clasping his hands behind his head. "This party blows. Taeyong's cool and all but something needs to happen."

"What would you even want to happen?" I asked.

He shrugged. "Something. Anything. I could get laid or be at home stuffing my face with frozen burritos and passing the fuck out."

"That sounds so titillating."

Johnny snorted. "Heh, tittle."

I rolled my eyes. "Shut up, you giant man child."

"Do you wanna hook up?" Yuta asked suddenly. He was never one for subtlety.

"Uh...like right now? I still kinda feel like crap."

"Fucking will help with that. We could all fuck." Johnny propositioned.

"Like a threesome?" I looked between the two of the as they shrugged, playing it off real cool. I blushed hard not knowing how to respond. It wasn't something I really had experience in but Yuta and Johnny were my two favorite people to fuck. Johnny was commanding and a little rough with a secretive soft side that poked through every once in awhile. Yuta was dirty to the core, bending me every which way and unabashed at anything he suggested we do. Things usually ended up messy with him but I never thought about fucking the two together. Having Johnny's thickness invade every inch of me while Yuta fucked me from behind; being so completely stuffed that my stomach would clench and I could feel so whole and perfectly ruined. I bit my lip and pressed my thighs together as scenes began to flourish in my mind.

"Hello?" Yuta snapped his fingers in front of my face. "Did you hear us?

"Huh? Uh...yeah, the hookup. Threesome. Um, I've never had a threesome before." I admitted shyly.

"I had one once but it wasn't that great. Dude was hogging the chick the whole time. So Yuta if you pull that shit I'm dipping out."

"Trust me dude. I've got my own plans. You can do whatever you want to her pus-"

I slapped my hand over his mouth, keeping him from saying that vile word. "We get it. You want to fuck my ass."

"You do that?" Johnny questioned.

I sighed and laid back down. "Only with Yuta. He gets excited over it and we'll…"

"She literally cums so hard when we do it. Don't let her fool you, she's just as big of a slut as I am."

"Shut up, asshole! I am not. Well...maybe a little but you don't have to point it out."

"Alright, let's cut the crap. Threesome of not? It's been awhile since you've gotten fucked, right? You and Lucas broke up like a month or so ago." Johnny said.

"Yeah, don't remind me…"

"Agree to fuck us and we'll make sure we can help you forget." Yuta said.

I sighed and gave in, too easily for my liking but the images I created where already burned into my mind. "Sure, why the fuck not."

Yuta said no more and dove to capture my neck in slow and methodical kisses, nibbling ever once in awhile. Johnny's large hand was working itself over my stomach as he leaned down to capture me in a kiss. His lips were so fucking amazing that sometimes it made my heart ache to have them against me. They were full, soft, and he knew exactly how to work them so I would get wet in an instant. I parted my lips and let his thick tongue creep into my mouth, sucking on my own and making sure I couldn't breathe. His fingers wiggled beneath the hem of my shirt and pushed it upwards to expose my chest to the cool breeze.

"Whoa, wait. We can't do it out here!" I whispered harshly.

"Shhh, it's just the beginning. We'll finish everything inside; we need the room anyway. For now I just want you legs spread open and to see if we can make you squirt off the rooftop." Yuta said deviously.

"D-dont you fucking dare!" My face was red at the thought but it shook me to my core. I ached for them to prove that they could make my body do such things.

"Take them off, Yuta." Johnny commanded. 

Yuta slipped his hand under my skirt to grab a hold of my panties and yank them down. I fumbled to try and keep them on, embarrassed that someone might see us but they got tossed to Johnny who pocketed them with a teasing smile. My legs were forced open then, the front clasp of my bra worked apart, so every tender area was exposed. Johnny latched his lips around my nipple, sucking deeply as his long middle finger trailed up the length of my slit. "She's already starting to get wet."

"Of course she is. Told you she was dirty." Yuta commented.

"If you two don't stop talking I'm going to-" I gasped softly as I felt Johnny push his finger inside me. It was slow and precise, dragging up and down my walls to work me up even more. He went back to teasing my breast while Yuta licked his fingers and set them over my clit. He circled them over the sensitive spot, pairing it with more bites to my neck that flowed down to my chest. I didn't know where to even put my hands at this point and I was already arching slightly against all their teasing. I felt Johnny hook his ankle over mine and nudge my leg to rest between his strong thighs. The center of his jeans pressed against the junction of my knee and thigh and he rocked against me, creating as much friction as possible. He moaned deeply against my chest and I couldn't help how frenzied it made my brain.

Yuta nudged his free hand between us, grabbing a hold on my wrist and guiding me to touch him. My fingers rubbed against the denim, feeling the way he was starting to bulge beneath the fabric. I closed my eyes then, letting my senses get overridden by their exploring hands and tongues. Johnny licked his way up my neck so his lips could rest by my ear. "I know you like getting stretched out but how many fingers do you think we can fit in there before you cum." He whispered in his slightly deepened voice. I turned away from him, trying to hide how embarrassed his words were making me and ended up catching Yuta's lips instead. Johnny chuckled softly as he watched my lips get occupied but someone else and shoved another finger inside me. With how big his hands were just those couple of digits had my entrance already working to accommodate him. 

Yuta scissored my lower lips open while the tip of his middle finger curled little strokes against my clit, leaving me open for more sensitivity. My hips bucked then and I squirmed, trying to move away for a moment to regain my composure. Pressure was building within the pit of my stomach as I could feel that orgasm creeping closer. As I tried to close my free leg, Yuta trapped it between his thighs, mimicking Johnny so I couldn't hide even if I tried. Anyone could look up and see me half naked and getting fingered to all hell and back. I knew they weren't going to let me go until I came. My breath burned in my lungs as I couldn't seem to catch it but I was just able to pant out a little beg. "P-please, m-more."

Yuta's fingers joined Johnny's then, forcing two more into me. While Johnny kept steady thrusts, Yuta curled his fingers in a beckoning motion, trying to dig the harshest reaction out of me. "Touch yourself." He commanded, adding a small nip to the shell of my ear afterward. I took over the attention to my clit while their fingers explored and bodies grinded against my thighs. My lower half trembled with the threat of release and I clamped my lips shut so I wouldn't draw attention from the other partygoers below. Both my nipples were overtaken by their mouths again just as I felt increased attention to a particularly sensitive spot within me. I grabbed at Yuta's hand to make sure he stayed in place and commanded Johnny to go faster. My own fingers increased speed as I heard my wetness echoing into the night. 

My toes were curling within my shoes, my body dipping against the panelling, and suddenly a rush of absolute bliss washed over me. I shuddered hard, my body practically collapsing in on itself as I slapped at their hands to try and remove the intensity. They didn't let up, becoming greedy for the way my body was creating splashes down the rooftop. I finally grabbed their hands and pushed them away to snap my legs shut and breathe. I muttered out curses while Johnny and Yuta were all smiles and cheers, high fiving each other in victory of my glorious and wet defeat.

"Damn, I didn't think you could actually do it!" Johnny said as excited as a puppy.

"Dude, I told you! That was fucking hot!"

I wanted to ask myself why I put up with their absolutely idiotic tendencies. They were stupid college kids with minds wrapped around partying, getting drunk or high, and getting laid. Nothing remotely appealing about that- then I was harshly reminded why I sought out their company when Johnny's bulge grazed against me again. When I glanced down I could tell that his jeans were trying desperately to keep him contained and he would be growling in my ear at any moment if he didn't get more attention. "We need to get inside." Johnny grunted right on cue. Yuta nodded and crawled up to the open window, tossing himself inside. Johnny and I followed suit and we were a clash of kisses and tongues, pulling off the rest of our clothes until my head was between Johnny's thighs and Yuta had my ass raised.

He shuffled around, rifling through Taeyong's drawers, looking intently for something. I was curious as to what he was doing but still currently occupied by the way Johnny filled my mouth entirely. I swallowed around him and gripped at his base to try and prevent him from thrusting harshly. He was always trying to get me to deep throat him but I couldn't take everything at once. It would usually end in a glaring contest with his hand firmly pushing my hand down until I tapped out. This time he seemed to be a little bit gentle and focused instead on the way my lips looked flowing over his thickness.

Yuta finally came back after a victorious exclamation. He had found whatever he was looking for and finally joined us on the bed. My hole was perfectly presented for him and I felt the familiar chill of lube against me. That must have been what he had been searching for in Taeyong's drawers. I sighed around my mouthful as his fingertip nudged against the barrier, slowly rocking until he poked through. His slender finger was enough to make me whimper and reach back to tap his outer thigh when I needed breaks. He was always good about that and filled our pauses with kisses up my spine or his thumb grazing the entrance of my heat. Eventually he was able to work his knuckle in and get a consistent rhythm going.

I popped off of Johnny when I felt his pre cum splatter across my taste buds, making sure he didn't get too worked up. He fumbled around for his pants that had been discarded on the floor, getting into the pocket of his jeans to pull out a condom. He ripped it open and I helped roll it on, kissing the tip playfully. "Yuta, let her move up to my lap." Johnny demanded.

Yuta scooted us closer so I could straddle Johnny and he could remain behind me to work my ass open. As Johnny slid his cock through my wetness, Yuta started to pry a second finger into me. He added a bit more lube and latched his teeth onto my shoulder, his other hand coming to cup my breast and make small pinches at my nipple. Johnny grabbed onto my hips, lifting me just a bit so I could sink down on his length. I bit down on my lip as soon as I felt that heavy fullness even within my stomach. He let out a moan from deep within his chest, head tossed back against the pillow and lips parted slightly. My bounces were small at first, giving Yuta a pace he could still work with as I desperately needed them both in me at the same time. I wished he could hurry up but patience, time, and dedication were needed for him to fuck me senseless.

The second finger made its way in fully and I felt the slight sting of my muscles trying to accommodate him. I took a few deep breaths, letting him push forward on every exhale. He scissored his fingers little by little, chuckling when he saw me gaped open. My cheeks burned as I knew he loved seeing me spread apart for him. I elbowed him gently, trying to get him to stop as my embarrassment continued. His lips were by my ear whispering the softest of teases. "You look so good like this I couldn't help myself."

"Yeah, we'll save your tired old lines for-" My hand flew to my mouth to cover a harsh gasp that was about to escape. Johnny had bucked his hips particularly hard to gain my attention. His brows were furrowed in irritation and he landed a heavy slap on my ass.

"Less talking, more working." He grunted.

I pouted but rolled my hips, feeling Johnny's cock press against my walls while Yuta curled his fingers deep within me. It was getting easier for him to work me open and the third finger edged in almost seamlessly. With each roll of my hips I was fucking myself back against them, squeezing my eyes shut and trying not to be too loud. I was sure the music would cover me but I didn't need the possibility of Taeyong coming in and see us defiling his bed.

Johnny dug his fingers into my thighs as he increased his pace. Heated skin on skin echoed throughout the room, mixing in with his slightly animalistic grunts and groans. Yuta gently rubbed my ass making my heart race as I knew what was next. "You ready?" He asked with a bit of concern. 

I nodded and turned my head for a kiss, his lips morphing into a smile as soon as we connected. "Dude, slow down a sec." Yuta told Johnny who seemed peeved at the request. He stopped his motions entirely as Yuta bent me over Johnny's torso. I heard the rip of his own condom packet and a few moments later he was lined up against me, thumbs spreading my asscheeks apart. Once his head creeped in past the barrier I buried my face deep into Johnny's neck, whimpering helplessly. 

"You ok?" He asked. I nodded, content that the both of them were showing their soft sides of being concerned for my well-being. It was a breath of fresh air given their usual antics.

"I got her. We've done this before." Yuta reassured the other man. More and more of me was filled, making my legs almost give out from their place over Johnny’s hips. All I could scream was 'oh god' in my head over and over and when Yuta finally was in the three of us groaned at the intense tight feeling surrounding around us.

"Please just fuck me." I said. I didnt want to waste anymore time as I needed my body turned into a pillar of pleasure between them. Yuta was the first to thrust and he grabbed a hold of my arms, pulling them behind me like reins to control his pace. Once Johnny joined in my eyes got lost in the back of my head and I was in a whirlwind of bliss. Each slam of their bodies into me created pressure that sent tingles throughout my entire being. I tried to keep up but it was hard to press into them when my body was getting destroyed. Veins and ridges crept up my walls, dragging through nerves and places I didn't think they could have ever reached. My thighs quaked as weakness set in but my lust wouldn’t be satisfied until I felt the warm heat of their cum inside me.

Johnny gripped my neck gently, nudging his thumb to lift my chin up so our lips could crash together. It was a sloppy mess of tangled breaths and soft groans, our tongues trying to stay melded as he fucked me harder. I clenched around him, bucking slightly when he pushed through the tightness. My second orgasm was approaching way too fast but there was no way to stop it. I pressed my forehead to Johnny, his whisper against my lips now. "Fuck, I wanna come for you."

"Don't say it just do it." I pleaded. 

Suddenly I was yanked back to be pressed against Yuta's chest. "You complained about that other dude hogging chicks and now you’re doing the same thing. Share a little." He chuckled.

"F-fuck you!" Johnny managed to groan out as he started to swell against my tightness.

"Such a cop out, cumming first." Yuta turned my face towards his, getting a taste of my lips again. He was thrusting upwards, getting every inch of him to slam into me relentlessly. He parted from me to replace his tongue with the pads of his index and middle finger. They pressed down on my tongue and I sucked hungrily around them. "You want me to touch you?" He teased. I nodded vigorously. If he added that extra magical sensation to my clit we'd all be a symphony of chaotic messes. He shoved his fingers in deeper, almost touching the back of my throat before teasing the digits back out slowly.

He worked them down between my breasts and towards my stomach until they met my clit and worked steady circles into me. Occasionally, he would tease my entrance, getting his fingertip in besides Johnny's cock and crooking his finger just an inch or so inside me. My eyes squeezed shut as I couldn't help but left let a loud moan run free, practically screaming for him not to stop. Johnny forced through one last sloppy thrust, raising his hips so his cock crashed against the deepest part of me, and spilled all he had within the rubber. I still felt that comforting heat through my lower belly and a smile crossed my lips. God, I needed that again and again. Yuta still was vibrant as ever, continuing to ravish me until my body tensed and flushed with warmth. I clenched my thighs around Johnny’s waist as my next orgasm gushed out, leaving trails across his abs. “F-fuck, s-sorry.” I whispered. He shook his head and sat up, cupping my face to kiss my lips and tired body. I held onto him as I could barely keep up with Yuta though I could feel him ready to lose himself at any moment as well.

“Don’t be sorry. You felt so fucking good.” He purred as he slipped out of me slowly. He gave me a wink as Yuta began his greed tirade of final thrusts, bending me over completely and ramming my ass back against him. Johnny watched us, making sure my head was turned towards him so he could see every expression of pain and pleasure on my face. I curled my fingers around the wrinkled bed sheets whimpering out Yuta’s name. His hips stuttered and his blunt nails dug into my skin as he burst within me, shoving his sheathed released as far down as he could. Johnny laid back and Yuta pulled out, flopping beside me. I could finally give my body the break it deserved as my lustful greed was quelled for now.

“Not gonna lie, I kinda missed that.” Johnny said.

Yuta hummed in agreement which got me thinking. We did all have good chemistry together and it was all for fun and after the hell I went through fun was exactly what I deserved. “Should we do it again? Like hook up? The three of us?” He asked.

“Well we’ve all fucked and then had this threesome so why stop now?”