#and my knee is fucked cause i fell on it bad a few months ago

[rosyblooom]

not so perfect strangers | ln4 smau

PAIRING: lando norris x private fem!reader SUMMARY: after getting completely splashed by a passing car, y/n throws all 'stranger danger' warnings out the window and hitches a ride home.

Instagram

yourusername posted to her story!

[ caption: OMFG THIS CAR JUST SPLASHED ME NOW I'M SOAKED😭😭😭 couldn't even see the driver ughh ]

[ caption: it's been almost 1 hr and i still look like a wet rat🙃 soo guess who's hitching a ride? (if i don't update within 2 hrs CALL THE POLICE PLS) ]

[ tagged: yourbestfriend, yourfriend + more ]

Instagram

yourusername posted to her story!

[ caption: no need to worry anymore, your girl made it back home🙂‍↕️ ]

[ tagged: yourbestfriend, yourfriend + more ]

Instagram

yourusername

liked by yourbestfriend, landonorris, yourfriend and 68 others

tagged: landonorris

yourusername "stranger danger" but not this one !! 🙂‍↕️

view all 22 comments

yourfriend girl what- is this who I think it is???

yourusername 🤭🤭

yourbestfriend UHM DINNER TOOO????

yourusername messaging u rn girly🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️

landonorris Again soon?👀

yourusername again tmrw? landonorris Again tomorrow. yourbestfriend what. the. fuck.

yourfriend pretty girl <33

(liked by author)

landonorris posted to his story!

[ caption: Day 2 ]

[ tagged: yourusername ]

Twitter

Instagram

yourusername posted to her story!

[ caption 1: mixing friend groups >>> ] [ caption 2: another day, another slay 🙂‍↕️ ]

[ tagged: landonorris, yourbestfriend, yourfriend + more ]

Tiktok

A couple days later...

yourusername posted to her close friends!

[ caption 1: lol ] [ caption 2: bye ]

Instagram

yourusername posted to her close friends!

[ caption 1: this is awkward ahaha... how about we all just forget about my silly goofy little story FOREVER AGO pretty please😁 ]

[ tagged: landonorris ]

story replies:

yourbestfriend "he's dead to me"🤡🤡

yourusername pfft tomato tomato right ahaha 😁

yourfriend folding after only 5 days is clown shit lmfao

yourfriend LMAOOO where did all that energy go??

yourusername new phone who dis😀

yourfriend Y/N STAND TF UP OMFG???

yourusername b-but pretty flowers🥺 yourfriend a lost cause I see...

yourfriend I spy with my little eye a whole damn circus!

yourfriend so real tbh

yourusername i knew you'd get me babe 🙂‍↕️

[ ... ]

yourusername posted to her close friends!

[ caption: STOP EATING ME UP IN THE REPLIES OMFG?? PLS FRIENDS I'M JUST A GIRLLL ]

A few months later...

Instagram

f1gossipofficial

liked by username, username, username, and 13,007 others

f1gossipofficial According to this picture sent to us by a fan in China, it seems Lando Norris has brought Y/N along with him for the upcoming Grand Prix.

The duo has been the subject of rumours and sightings together for a while now. Could this weekend finally mark the debut of a new wag?

They certainly appear close in the photo! 👀

view all 845 comments

username just fell to my knees in walmart🧎‍♂️

username aw that picture is so cuteee i already love them together <33

username i feel like she's stuck up tbh cause i've been requesting to follow her for almost a month now and nothing. like girl you're not that important please😒

username uhmm...you're a weirdo username lmaooo how about you go live your life then if she isn't that important what💀

username I saw them too!! I asked for a pic with lando and she was super sweet and took it for us :)

username aw that makes me happy to hear username she did the same for me in monaco 🫶

username she gives bad vibes...

username y'all say that about everyone omg stfu

yourusername posted to her story!

[ caption 1: entering my lucky charm era hmm?👀 ] [ caption 2: AHHH P2 OMFG!!!! SO PROUD OF U LAN ❤️ ❤️ (you're welcome also 😌) ]

[ tagged: landonorris ]

lando.jpg

liked by yourusername, danielricciardo, martingarrix, and 501,883 others

lando.jpg 🇨🇳

view all 3,097 comments

username rip lando's single era 😞💔

username crying and throwing up fr

yourusername ❤️

(liked by author)

username day 593 of begging you to make your insta public🥹 username with the way y'all treated Luisa I doubt that will happen username who tf is y'all?🤨

username P2 LET'S FUCKING GOOOOOO

username ik everyone's been hating but I actually like that y/n's super private bc it shows she's with him for the right reasons :)

username right she seems genuine 🫶

username so proud of you lando 🧡🧡

username LAST PIC SHOULD BE MEEE

1:22 ───────ㅇ───── 2:22

[monzamash]

pit in my stomach - lando norris

rating – mature (cheating, language, sexual references) requested by @landograndprix - hugging you tight, my friend!

it was hard to pin point the moment his love for you had been diminished by his crippling guilt or when you knew there was nothing he could say or do to piece you back together. maybe it was around the time you’d asked him point blank whether he saw you in his future and he stuttered over his truth with an unconvincing of course i do when the dagger had already been deployed into your unsuspecting back. naively blinded by love.

or maybe it was the night lando stumbled home from the local, half a pint of slushing lager still in his hand while the other held a small, black velvet box. he dropped down on one knee, eyes bloodshot with tears and a trembling bottom lip – a stark contrast to your hardened stare and crossed arms shielding you from the blow, physically and emotionally spent.

“i fucked up… i-god i hate that i've hurt you, baby and i wish i could take it all back – i fucked up so bad and i’m so sorry.”

“you didn’t fuck up, lando – you fucked someone else for six months and lied to my face and made me feel like i was losing my mind! do you have any idea how much pain you’ve caused?”

the room fell silent, boiling blood pumping in your ears.

“huh?! do you?”

“no–”

“no you don’t! i've been stupid enough to keep chasing after you and all you’ve done is let me down and made me look like a fucking idiot! everyone knew about her, about what you were doing behind my back and you knew it was wrong but you couldn’t stop! you’re a monster and i’m not going to cry over a mistake you made…"

sadness welled as you stared down at the man kneeling at your feet. he was a stranger who only resembled the man you loved in appearance, not in honour or integrity or character – you were grieving the lando who had showed you the world with so much love and adoration and hope.

"you will have to live with this mistake for the rest of your life.”

“you’re right. i will never forgive myself 'cause she meant nothing and i have to fix this – i need to fix this because i love you.. so much. i’ll get help, i’ll see someone just give me a chance to fix it…”

“do you really think that is going to fix it?”

you pointed to the dainty box that held so much weight. in a way it represented a future founded on four years of memories, of something resembling happiness. sure, there had been disappointments, hundreds of missed calls, a few missed anniversaries and your gnawing intuition saying that maybe the paranoia wasn’t just inside your head. but ending like this, in betrayal and heartache – you hadn’t seen that one coming.

lando swallowed the lump forming in his throat, queasy from the drunken stupor he’d drank himself into and the dread settling in the pit of his empty stomach, “thought it might be start…”

a strained laugh slipped from pursed lips as venom coated your sharpened tongue, “and that is how i know you will never change.”

“please,” lando scrambled to his feet and reached out for your hand in an attempt to stop you from walking away, “please don’t leave me…” he begged, voice barely above a whisper.

lando knew he would never forget the look in your eyes when you slowly turned back to him – they were cold and punishing, bone-chilling. they swirled with the web of lies and sorrow that he had inflicted upon the person he loved the most in the world, who had given him everything she had, who loved him unconditionally, which made it nearly impossible to accept that he had lost you.

“you left me six months ago when you slept with her, lando.”

more writing...

[whumping-valentine]

Hey, whumplr

Yeah, you. Do you need a quick and easy way to temporarily immobilize your whumpees, that doesn't cause serious injury, but is also painful? Then look no further than the wonderful thing that my brother accidentally did to me a few years ago! Which is hit a GOLFBALL DIRECTLY ONTO MY KNEE.

So there I am, minding my own business at my grandma's house next door, on my phone, sitting on a swing while my brother hits a golfball around in the yard. When out of fucking NOWHERE pain just SHOOTS through my leg because this IMBECILE decided to hit the ball TOWARDS THE PORCH.

DIRECTLY ONTO MY RIGHT KNEE.

It hurt SO BAD. I literally fell to the floor clutching my knee, being all dramatic and woe-is-me because it's how I cope with pain. Meanwhile my brother was just impressed he managed to hit a target that small. I thought it was just gonna be temporary. Just ride it out and I'll be fine. And it was. AT FIRST.

I went home laughing with my brother like, "hey mom, guess what happened" but soon after a few hours the pain came back and it didn't leave. I couldn't even move my leg without it hurting. I consider myself to have a pretty high pain tolerance, yet this had me fighting for my life, man. I never take pain meds unless I feel like I'm dying and I had those bitches on speed dial. It was a journey just to hobble across the hall to go to the bathroom. I was duel wielding canes like a soldier in battle. A few days later before deciding I needed to go to the doctors I was crying in pain and my brother felt so bad he started crying, too.

I had to go and get the most painful X-rays ever to make sure my knee was fucking okay. I was FORCED to stretch it out straight and I was fucking crying on the table like a baby and it was embarrassing. To make it even worse I have mild cerebral palsy that mostly affects my right side, and an exercise I'm supposed to do is stretch out my legs; WHICH HURTS ENOUGH AS IT IS. BECAUSE IT ISN'T SOMETHING I REALLY EVEN CAN DO. I had my leg in like a permanent bent position, man, it hurt so bad to force it out straight. I was shaking and the lady was all "I can't do the X-ray unless your leg is straight" and I was all like "I CAN'T DO IT *CRYING*"

Turns out it was mostly swelling, and I had to take antibiotics to get it to go down, which took like a fucken week.

And actually, a month later, I went out into the city with my family to see a concert. I love the city because I live in a rural place and don't get to see stuff like that too often. I was excited to walk around when all of a sudden my ENTIRE LEG decided it wanted to be a demon. It felt like the joint contecting my leg to my pelvis had a knife sticking through it, and it went all the way down my thigh to my knee. I KNEW it was from the golfball. I was so upset. Though still I persisted on. I walked through that damn city with a limp in my step, getting pizza and cheesecake BY WALKING what a miracle. Unheard of in my rural brain. Amazing.

But damn, man, if you want your whumpees to be crying in pain and unable to move without it hurting like a bitch, just take a golf club and wack them in the knees. Not a serious injury, but it HURTS. Hell, go ahead and take out their elbows too, while you're at it.

Anyways! Yeah. There's your inspo. Golf club to the knees. 10/10.

[parker-d-bloodrose]

The Horror of having a Body.

This is kind of a longy inspired by a spiral rant I had on BlueSky just now. It's a bit more personal than I'd like but here's a rant about having a chronically in pain body, and also a trans body. And also how much I actually don't like having a body in general!

The horror of having a body is inescapable. I sometimes do not *want* to be confined to this flesh. And yet, here I am piloting this meat suit. If my body were a house it would be one that's been abandoned and now its windows are smashed and there's a rickety staircase missing half the steps. The previous owner was not kind to it. He did not care to be. It was simply functional to him. His ghost is still there sometimes. I see it in the way I smile with my crooked teeth. He never smiled that way, I know, but that's fine. He didn't *know* what smiling was except that it was a thing that other people did. I try and treat this house nicer. I replace the windows. Fix the stairs. I don't change the way my voice sounds - I like it! I don't like how other people react to it.

Because it's another manifestation of his ghost to them. They can't see that I'm not him - I am me. I live in a house haunted by myself. This is the horror of the body that I find the most distressing. I don't want a body because of how others perceive that body. I also don't want the body because of how it's so fucked up. Like, imagine if you will. If he had cared to take care of his teeth they wouldn't be crooked fence posts. If I had taken care of my teeth.

There's other problems with my body that I've only recently realized I had too. For as long as I can remember my knees have always given out from under me randomly at times. I just assumed this was normal and everybody's knees buckled and they fell. This, I have learned is not normal. It happens a bit more frequently now with the various parts of my body that I've damaged. I've fallen down at work because my bad knee gave out on me after standing on it for 8+ hours doing my work because my left knee is bad. I think that injury is actually a result of my knees already being bad!

The falling thing was never painful btw, just a nuisance because I'd be walking along like normal and oops, guess I'm falling down and on one knee. I've become quite the expert at falling down as a result. my back is still trying to recover from the injury I caused when I crashed my bike a few months ago. I slept without my pillows under me properly last night and my entire lower back and abdomen are unhappy with me. But I'm still here piloting this meat suit. This horrifying thing I don't want. I never asked for it! But I've got it anyway. Yesterday I was struck by how much I hated it. This body of mine filled me with such violent rage and despair that all I could do was watch body horror videos and stew under a soft blanket. But sometimes I think it would be nice to not have a body at all, or at least one that’s not made out of meat.

[endorstoiii]

My wright #3 - I'm back

I know I've been very far from tumblr for a long time, but I had no idea my last appearance here was on Feb 20th. Long four months that, honestly, felt like just a few weeks.

I don't remember the exact reason why I got offline, but I suppose it was a huge amount of tasks (home + course), and add it tons and tons of exhaustion (mental, emotional and physical).

It's no surprise that my life only gets worse, and I'm not exaggerating or being dramatic or playing the victim. I really mean it. Also, I'm not being negative and pessimist. Nothing works for me. I am unemployed and I'm looking for a job for three years. Ok, we had a fucking pandemic in the middle of the process, but things are back to normal already and everyone I know had success after all of that. Except for me. Do you know how fucked up is it to be unemployed? It more than sucks. I only get older (and more tired) and it hinders to find a job. Not only "I am too old" to get a beginners job, but also I feel so uncapable, psicologically I am destroyed because no matter how hard I try to get my shit together, nothing works. I even get some job interviews, but I never step forward. I can't get a job as a designer. I can't get a job as anything else — I tried to get a job on many different areas, except for seller cause the pressure is way too much for me to handle (I am way too bad already, I can't get any worse or God knows what may happen) — I can't get any little ray of success at anything at all. Why? Is it me?

Honestly, I don't think I am the problem. Not anymore. I used to think I was terrible as a student, as a designer and then I would be a terrible professional as well. Plus, I am too shy and dumb, I wouldn't know what to do in much pressure, and job recruiters know that and would never approve me. But no. I know I am good in what I do. Obviously I'm not the best (and I think I don't even want to be, so that's ok), but I'm good and I deserve more. I am so attentious, cautios and passionate (finally! this would be a good topic to write about: my passion for design). And being shy and dumb? Like... Everyone is hah I know people who are even shyer and dumber, and they have a job, they do a great work. So, no. I am not the problem. So, the only answer I can think of is: external influence. I am the least spiritual person I know (another good topic to write about), but oh man, it's the only thing that makes any sense to me. I believe the horrendous, deep and negative energy of the enviroment I live in, unfortunately influences my paths. And not only to get a job, but to anything to me. For example, I can't have a date. I can't. My life is too bad, my psychologic is too bad, my emotional too bad. This is all because of this fucking shitty energy of the enviroment I live in.

Well, no surprises here. But yeah my life was a mess and got even worse. It gets worse with time. And as if everything isn't all fucked up already, my grandma (who is kinda still recovering from her knee fracture) fell of the stairs and broke her two wrists. Now, again, me and my mom have to take care of her — but this time we must keep our eyes on her all. the. time. Do you know how exhausting and demanding taking care of an old person can be??? I had no clue until last year when she broke her knee, now it's her knee and two arms. My God.

Just when I thought I was getting a bit better, I got totally worse again. But now I feel like I'm a little bit less shitty than I was a couple of months ago. Seriously, about two months ago I was so bad as I've never been my whole life :( I tried looking for psychological help but, uh oh, how will I afford it if I'm unemployed? I can't get better psychologically, I can't get better emotionally, I can't get better financially, I can't get better in any layer of life... However, these past weeks I felt a little motivation to just keep on going one day at a time, I miss tumblr and I miss my friends & mutuals, I miss doing those tagging post stuff. These are some of the things that bring me some joy :) despite feeling the worst ever, I want to be here and I want to keep on doing, cause if I don't, I will probbaly disassociate for real and I don't even know what's next.

This is probably the longest text post I've written here, but well deserved cause four months away from my safe place... It's a lot. I don't know how long this motivation phase will take, I hope it's like before. But while I'm here, I want to be here.

[sugaroto]

Our greek teacher.... well

Last year, we had her like 8 hours a week, (essay, literature, history and latin) and we hated every second of it cause she's like the most boring person on earth

This year she took our class again for Essay (γενικη) and she was also the one responsible for our class "cause she knew us since last year"

Again boring class, but at least I got to sit with my best friend

Around November, she got covid (same week I did)

Some weeks later, before Christmas, she shows up at school with wounds all over her face cause while she was wearing a scarf and a mask her glasses blurred and she fell on her face

Like 2 months ago, at the start of March I think, she didn't came to school and we learned that her leg got tangled in a bag while she was trying to get out of the car and she fell and broke her leg, and it's pretty bad cause apparently?liquid? Is coming out of her knee and she won't come to school again

Like they brought a new teacher after Easter to replace her

Who the fuck cursed her??

How did everything happened to her in a span of a few months

I know we were probably shitty students and she regretted picking our class and that we disliked her for how boring she was but damn I feel sorry for her

I know she's not currently on the island so I hope someone is taking care of her and she relaxes a bit

[sacredsorceress]

Worth the Risk || Bucky Barnes

pairing: bucky barnes x avenger!reader

summary: when bucky and sam get captured you have to go in alone to save them leading to a worried, overprotective bucky who cares about you a bit more than a teammate should

a/n: reblogs and replies are super appreciated!!

word count: 2.2k

warnings: description of violence, injuries, a gun, dagger and blood, swearing, angst w/ happy ending

masterlist || taglist

“Bucky?” You whispered through the earpiece. “Sam? Where are you guys-”

Sitting in the van, you began to grow worried as you couldn’t find any of your teammates on the screen after they had turned around a corner. Tapping the earpiece, you were about to speak again when you heard Sam’s voice on the other end.

“Y/n?”

Sitting forward in your chair, you breathed a premature sigh of relief.

“Sam? Thank God you guys are okay.” You told him. “I was worried when-”

“Y/n, listen,” Sam cut you off, his voice a near whisper. “They got us- me and Bucky- but I think you’ll be able to take them out if you think you’re ready for it.”

You began to feel your heart race in your chest just at the proposition. Although you had joined the group almost half a year ago, you had never gone on a mission by yourself- always having others to back you up, but you knew Sam well enough that he wouldn’t have suggested the idea lightly. If he asked you to go in alone... you knew it was because there was no other choice.

“Okay.” You said. “I can do this, Cap. I’ll be there soon- just hold on.”

With that, you left the vehicle, making your way into the building. When the door of the facility closed behind you, you raised your gun.

“You shouldn’t have told her to come in here.” Bucky told Sam, pacing around their cell. “If we couldn’t handle it together, what makes you think that she can do it by herself? You’re going to get her killed-”

“Buck,” Sam said firmly. “I know you’re worried about her, but she can handle herself. She’s our only shot of getting out of here so I’m gonna need you to calm down.”

Sitting himself down in the corner of the room, Bucky said nothing more to Sam, instead placing his head in his hands.

Bucky knew logistically that you could handle yourself- you were on the team for a reason- but that didn’t mean he didn’t worry about you. He worried about you all the time- even in training- nagging Sam if he threw you down a bit too hard and feeling his heart drop to his stomach when bruises littered your body after a mission. He hated seeing you get hurt, but as he sat in the cell with Sam, knowing that you were coming into the building all on your own- he felt as though he was going to be sick.

Now he wasn’t there to watch your back. He wasn’t there to make sure you wouldn’t get hurt. He wasn't there to make sure you didn't get yourself killed- the thought of it too horrible for him to even allow himself to think about. He worried because he knew in your line of business, every wrong move could be fatal and he couldn’t bare the thought of not having you by his side every day.

Listening to the sound of water leaking from the sealing above him, Bucky prayed you would be alright.

Turning a corner inside of the building, you were hoping the same.

Peaking around the edge of a wall you spotted two men, armed with batons. Taking a deep breath, you aimed for one of the men’s bullet proof vest, taking the shot and knocking him to the ground. Immediately the other man ran towards you with the baton raised in his hand. 

Ducking as he swung the baton, you threw a punch to the man’s stomach, knocking him backwards, but just as you did the other man hit you in your back with the baton.

“Fuck!” You screamed out in pain, taking the man’s arm between your knees. You pulled the baton out of his hand as you stretched it in the other direction, causing him to yelp out in pain. 

Once in your hand, you spun around, swinging the man in the face with the baton, knocking him unconscious. Dropping it to the floor, you pulled your taser from your belt, shocking the other man, forcing him to the ground.

“Y/n?” You heard Sam ask through the earpiece. “Y/n are you alright?”

Shoving the taser back in its slot and raising your gun once again, you stepped over the two men’s unconscious bodies, running down the hallway.

“I am now.” You huffed, placing one of your hands on your lower back. “When this is over, you’re paying for my chiropractor.”

Turning another corner, you were met with a man and a woman standing at the end of the hallway.

“Are you guys always in pairs?” You asked. “Frankly I think it’s unfair.”

When they said nothing, just raising their batons from their belts, you spoke up again.

“Where are my friends?” You asked more seriously.

“You’re about to find out.”

The woman running at you first, you hit the butt of your gun in her face causing her to wobble backwards but the second you did, you felt a burst of searing hot pain run throughout your face as the baton collided with your nose. Stumbling backwards, you felt as another of the baton’s swings hit your midsection, causing you to double over in pain.

The man tugged your collar as you felt another blow connect with your face.

Wheezing, you dropped the gun to your side.

Standing in front of you, the woman slid her baton back into her belt.

“See?” she said. “I’m sure your friends will be happy to see-”

As she spoke you carefully slid your dagger out of your belt, but before she was able to finish her sentence, you threw it cleanly at her, the dagger jamming itself through her shoulder, sticking her to the wall.

“Shit!” She shouted in pain.

Immediately afterwards, the man grabbed your coat shoving you against the wall only to throw another punch to your mouth. Rather than giving him the satisfaction of yelping out in pain, you headbutt the man, causing him to stumble backwards into his partner. Grabbing the baton from his hand, you swung it over his head, knocking him unconscious.

Spitting blood onto the ground, you heaved as you picked up your gun and the keys from the man’s waist, making your way over to the room on the right.

Swinging the door open, your eyes immediately fell onto the reinforced cell in front of you, Bucky and Sam rushing to the front. Stumbling over to the cell, you unlocked the door, swinging it open and leaning against it.

“Y/n?” You heard Bucky’s voice first as he ran over to you. “Fuck, look at you.”

Moving his hands to cup your face, not being able to help yourself from wincing, Bucky could feel his heart shatter in his chest. Sure, you had a few bruises here and there in the past but never this bad.

You had a deep gash across your nose that he was sure would need stitches along with a cut along your lip and a large bruise forming around your eye- and that was just your face.

Looking up and seeing his worried eyes, you shot him a quaint, bloody smile.

“You should see the other guys.” You joked.

You attempted to laugh, only to wheeze and begin to cough.

“Y/n this isn’t funny.” He said seriously. “You could have died. Sam should have never asked-”

“Bucky,” You cooed, reaching your hands up to cup his face. “I’m okay. Besides, I couldn’t leave my favorite boys in here could I?”

Feeling your fingertips against his face, he couldn’t help but melt into your touch. You always managed to make him a lovesick mess as if he was still fifteen and not a one hundred and six year-old man who had been to hell and back.

“Hate to break up the reunion,” Sam said. “But those guys will only be out for so long. We got to get out of here.”

-

After falling asleep on the car ride back to the Compound, you woke up in bed, the dim glow of the lamp shining on the night stand above you. Opening your eyes, you pushed yourself up in the bed, only for a shooting pain to spread throughout your torso. Not able to stop yourself, you yelped out in pain.

“Hey, hey,” You heard none other than Bucky’s voice beside you, one of his hands coming to rest on yours while the other adjusted your pillow. “Take it easy.”

“I am, Doc.” You lied, leaning against your newly adjusted pillow.

Tucking you in, Bucky shook his head, leaning on the nightstand beside you.

“We should have never let you go in alone.” He sighed, leaning his head on his hand. “I just felt sick the entire time. You could have died, Y/n. If they just hit you in the wrong spot... I’m never letting you go in alone again. I’m not letting you leave my sight.”

During your time as a member of the group, you and Bucky had grown incredibly close and during the past few months maybe even closer than friends. It was normal for him to worry- you never even had to wonder where he was during missions because he always had your back- but looking at his face now you could tell just how worried he had been and you couldn’t help but feel your heart break.

“Bucky,” You hummed. “You go on dangerous missions all the time alone. How am I any different?”

A silence settled over the two of you as Bucky squeezed your hand. 

Not meeting your eyes, he spoke up again.

“Because I can’t lose you.” Bucky said, his voice nearly a whisper. “I can’t even think about what would happen if anything happened to you, Y/n. Even seeing the cuts and bruises on your face? I’m... I’m not the Winter Soldier anymore, but I think if you put me in a room with those people I would kill them for what they did to you. I almost broke us out of the cell myself because I hated the idea so much of you going in there on your own. If something happens to me... it’s different. Nothing can happen to you, Y/n. Nothing.”

Staring at the super soldier sat at your bedside, you began to feel tears prick in your eyes. You had cared for Bucky in a way that you had been too afraid to admit- not wanting to ruin your friendship- but as he sat there, confessing his feelings for you, you couldn’t help but feel your heart tug in your chest, just wanting him.

“Do you love me?” You asked finally before you could stop yourself.

Looking up at your injured face, he felt his breath catch in his throat. He wasn’t able to read you in the moment at all, your face straight, seriousness laced in ever bit. All he could think was that even with the black eye and the stitches across your nose, he had never seen someone as beautiful as you.

He knew his answer. There wasn’t a single part of him that doubted it.

“Yes.” 

Hearing his answer, you stared at him and smiled.

“Are you sure?” You asked. “Do you love me as more than a teammate-”

“Y/n,” He cut you off, squeezing your hand once again. “As much as I love working with you, every time you call me your ‘teammate’ I want to go find a punching bag.”

Trying to bite back your smile, you couldn’t help but chuckle.

You hated calling him “only” your teammate just as much as he did- if not more.  Knowing that he hated it just as much as you the entire time you used the word to disguise your true feelings made you feel as if a weight had been lifted off of your chest despite the aches that still consumed your being.

Bucky was more than your teammate, he was your partner.

“Oh Thank God.” You laughed. “I can’t tell you how many I’ve knocked off the hook after you called me your ‘friend’.”

Furrowing his eyebrows, he leaned in closer to you.

“What are you saying?” He asked.

Shaking your head in disbelief, you reached your free hand up to his hair, brushing it back with your hand.

“I’m saying,” You smiled. “that I love you too and that I’m not going anywhere, Buck.”

Leaning into your touch, a smile finally reached across his face. “You know, if it weren’t for your stitches, I would kiss you right now.”

“So my face isn’t too messed up then, right, Doc?” You asked. “If you still want to kiss me and all...”

Reaching your hand up to his lips, he pressed a soft kiss to your skin.

“You could never look bad, doll.” He hummed. “But promise me you won’t do that to me again. I almost had a heart attack, Y/n.”

Leaning your head against your pillow, admiring him, you smiled.

“I promise, Buck.”

[m-jelly]

Hi Jelly! Can I request a fic where reader is a nurse in the survey corps and takes care of Levi when he's hurt? Thank you!!

Aww, so cute <3 I'll set it before all the chaos happens. So, it'll be a simple injury, but enough that Levi needs the nurse's help.

I'm sick, I swear. So, keep treating me.

Pairing: Levi x Reader

Genre and tags: romance, Levi is crushing, nurse reader, slightly hurt Levi, he's bad at romance but cute, fluff, flustered Levi, becoming a couple, canon world.

Concept: Levi's had a crush on you for a while, but hasn't had a chance to get close to you because you're a busy nurse. During training, the strap on his leg digs into his thigh too much and he has to go to you for medical help. You look after Levi and make sure he's all better and discharge him when he's better. However, he keeps coming back with made-up problems and lies about his leg. So, when you confront him, the shy and flustered Captain finally confesses.

Levi moved fast through the trees with his gear after an out of control cadet. He twisted too harshly causing the strap of his gear to dig into his right thigh badly. He grabbed the cadet and saved them from slamming into a tree. He lowered them down, but as soon as he put his right leg down he grunted as pain fired through him.

Levi limped a little, then fell over and onto his left knee. "Tch, shit!"

The cadet shot up and bowed. "I'm so sorry Captain!"

Levi gritted his teeth. "Just get back to training if you're not hurt!"

"Yes, Captain!"

Levi huffed, then pushed himself up and limped a little. He cried out in pain, then slammed against the tree. "Son of a-."

"Levi?" Hange moved closer. "Are you okay?"

Levi glared at her. "Do I look okay!?"

Hange hummed. "Well, if you're going to be like that."

Levi sighed when she started walking away. "Wait! Can you help me get back to my room? I've fucked up my leg."

Hange walked closer and hummed. "Well, you should go see the nurse."

Levi winced. "No thanks."

"Are you sure? The old nurse has changed shifts again."

Levi looked up at his friend as he felt excitement. You might be back. "Who's on duty?"

Hange said your name. "I saw her this morning."

Levi gulped hard as he felt excitement in him. He'd met you a few months ago and had fallen hard for you. However, two months ago you were moved to the military police. He was glad you were back because he got to see your pretty face around, hear your sweet laugh and maybe build up the courage to ask you out.

Levi sighed and knew what he had to ask for. "Hange? Give me some help with getting to the nurse."

Hange slung her arm over her shoulder. "I got you." She helped him to the base. "What happened?"

He groaned. "A cadet went too fast with his gear. I had to stop him, otherwise, he would have slammed into the tree and probably kill himself. I had to twist my body badly to grab him, which caused my damn gear to tighten on my thigh too much."

"Damn. You must be in a lot of pain."

"I am."

She hummed and led him down the hall to the nurse's room. "You'll need to take your trousers off. You okay with that?"

Levi blushed. "Y-yes."

You turned to your door and smiled at Hange. "Hello." You looked at Levi. "Long time no see Levi."

Levi blushed more. "Tch, hey brat."

You watched him limp. "Bring him over to the bed." You helped Hange lift, Levi, onto the bed. "Lie back Levi."

Hange backed up towards your door. "I'll see you later."

You waved to her, then you smiled at Levi. "I'll lock the door for privacy."

Levi gulped hard. "S-Sure."

You locked your door, then walked over to Levi. "Alright, so I'm guessing it's your leg."

Levi nodded. "Right thigh. My gear dug into it too much."

You started undoing his straps. "How did you manage that?"

He looked at your sweet and pretty face as you focused. "I was saving a cadet. He was going to slam into a tree and you'd have a dead body on your hands."

You smiled. "You're a good man Levi. So, I'm guessing you twisted too hard and that's how you got hurt."

He sighed. "Yeah."

You locked eyes with Levi making him flush bright red because you caught him looking. "Take your trousers off."

Levi went red. "What!?"

You smiled. "I can take them off for you, but I'm sure you'd prefer it if you did it yourself."

Levi popped the button, then lowered the zip down. He pushed his trousers down, then stopped when his leg hurt. "Ah, shit."

You held his trousers, then pulled them down. "I've got it."

Levi placed his hands on his boxers where his dick was. He didn't want you to see his slight bulge. "How does it look?"

You slipped a hand under his thigh, then lifted his leg and inspected his thigh. "Looks like you might have torn the muscle. I've got something for that, but you'll need bed rest. I don't want you moving from this bed until I say so."

Levi sighed. "Okay."

"Don't worry, I'll be with you the whole time." You looked at your medical things, then picked out some pain meds and a special cream to help ease the pain and reduce bruising. You gave Levi the meds and water, then you massaged the cream into where he was hurt. "I'll keep an eye on you and if you need to move about, I'll help. I have a bathroom here for you and I'll bring you food when you're hungry."

Levi sat up on the bed. "Thank you."

You walked over and sat on the bed, then smiled at him. "You should take better care of yourself, Levi." You lightly touched under his eyes. "You look so tired." You cupped the side of his face. "You worry me so much." You rubbed your thumb against his cheek. "I kept worrying about you the whole two months I was away." You let out a long sigh. "Have you been eating and sleeping properly?"

He shook his head. "Not sleeping, but I have been eating."

You sighed. "Levi."

"Sorry."

You hummed, then walked over to your meds and grabbed sleeping pills. "Here. Take these and get some rest. I'll be here with you, so if you have a nightmare I'll wake you."

Levi took the pills, then lay back. "Okay."

You held his hand, then sat with him. "I've got you."

Levi smiled a little. "Thank you."

"It's a pleasure."

You took care of Levi and made sure he was looked after. You'd both would talk for hours, eat together and sleep next to each other. You'd comfort him and play card games to cheer him up. The two of you were so relaxed with each other. You kept him with you for two weeks of blissful fun and flirting, then you discharged him and made him promise he'd rest for a further two weeks. You thought you wouldn't see much of him, but you were wrong.

You were helping a scout with cuts and heard your door open and close. "Be with you in a second!" You finished up and smiled. "There. Keep the wound clean, but don't soak it. Off you go." You cleaned up, then turned to see Levi was waiting. "Levi. Everything okay?"

He walked closer. "No."

You frowned a little. "Oh no. What's wrong?"

He gulped and massaged his thigh. "It aches."

You hummed. "Really? I thought I gave you a clean bill of health recently. Your muscle was fine last time I checked it."

"It just aches." He blushed. "Could you help me?"

You nodded, then went to your medicine cabinet and found the cream you'd used before. "Here we are." You handed it over to him. "Massage this into the painful area, okay?"

He stared at the cream. "Right, right."

You titled your head, then smiled at him. "There anything else? You look like you want to say something."

He did, he really did. He wanted to ask you out, but he was scared. "N-no."

You sighed. "Alright then. Get better soon, okay?"

"Sure."

You waved goodbye and carried on working. The next day, Levi was back. "Morning. Is it your thigh again? If so, I might have to send you to the hospital."

Levi shook his head. "No. I umm...I think I have a temperature."

"Really?" You placed your hand on his forehead. "I don't feel anything." You sighed, then held his hand and pulled him to the bed. "Sit and I'll check your temperature." You grabbed what you needed, then popped the thermometer in his mouth. "Alright, just gonna check your glands." You placed your fingers on his neck and squeeze about. "Feels alright to me." You pulled the thermometer and checked. "All normal." You frowned a little. "You sure you feel hot?"

He nodded. "Yes! I felt hot."

You hummed. "I think maybe some tea with honey and lemon might help a bit. Also, get some vitamins in you."

"Okay."

You smiled at him. "You're free to go."

Levi walked out your door, then said your name. He paused a moment, then sighed. "Thanks."

You waved to him. "Any time." You again finished for the day and the next morning, Levi was back. "Levi. What is it this time?"

Levi blushed. "I'm cold. I've got the chills."

You hummed a laugh. "Alright. Take a seat. You know the drill." You checked his temperature again. "All good signs." You let out a long sigh. "Levi? Did your mother ever tell you about the boy who cried wolf before she passed?"

Levi blushed because you'd caught him. "Yes."

You hummed. "Is there something you want to tell me?"

He looked you in the eyes. "I'm sick, I swear. So, keep treating me."

You walked over, then cupped his face. "Sick? Are you sure you're sick?"

He nodded. "I've come down with something awful."

"What is it?"

He blushed and whined. "I've fallen in love."

Your eyes widened, then you laughed. "My, my Levi." You sat down next to him. "That is a sickness and I know what you need treatment wise."

He looked at you. "What is it?"

"Tell the woman you love that you love her, then kiss her and hold her if she wants you back." You rubbed his back. "You're a handsome, strong, brave, kind and so sweet Levi. Any woman would be lucky to have you. So, who's the lucky lady?"

He fiddled with his hands. "You."

You gasped, then blushed. "M-Me? Me? Really? I umm, well. I'm not the best looking Levi and I'm just a silly nurse."

He turned to you a little and held your hands. "I've fallen in love with you." He said your name so sweetly. "I'm deeply in love and I want to be with you. I'm silly for coming up with all these sicknesses. I'm not sick. The only real one was my thigh when I first hurt it. Look, I lied because I wanted to have an excuse to see you and I'm awful at getting my feelings across to people." He lowered his head and whispered. "I just love you so much."

"Levi?" You smiled when he hummed at you. "Levi, look at me." You waited for him to look at you. "You don't need an excuse to come see me. You are welcome here anytime. Plus, you could have just asked me on a date."

"I'm nervous. Tch, you make me so fucking nervous, but the good kind."

You kissed him lightly at first, then he kissed you back allowing it to become more loving and passionate. You pulled back and giggled when he chased your lips. "Ask me."

"Ask what?"

"Ask me on a date and if I will be your girlfriend."

Levi whined a little. "Will you go on a date with me and be mine?"

You smiled, then kissed his cheek. "Yes to both."

Levi's eye lit up, then he lept off the bed and jumped up and down. "YES!" He stopped and blushed. "Ah. I mean. Tch, good."

You giggled at how cute he was. "So, wanna go on that date now?"

He grabbed your hands and pulled you off the bed. "Let's go."

[hotch-stufff]

Surprise, Surprise

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x F!reader

Warnings!: there are no warnings, im not telling you a single thing. It's a surprise. Just read and find out ;)

Also, as much as I love him, Jack does not exist in this story, wasn't really sure how to write him in.

Author's Note: I'm so sorry that I haven't written in a while, I have had no inspiration and my bf dumped me so... ya'know that was nice. Anyways, finally getting some inspo, hopefully I will be writing more. Hope you guys enjoy this one :) Also, the mood board is mine, but the images are all from pintrest.

Word count: 1.4 k words

This is an emotional roller coaster

------------

You couldn't breathe.

You couldn't move, or speak.

Your knees gave out as you fell to the floor, sobs racking your body.

You felt arms wrap around you, but it didn't help. You were suffocating. He was your air, and he had just been ripped from your lungs. 

He was gone, dead.

Your husband.

The love of your life.

Aaron Hotchner was dead

* * *

You don't remember anything after the doctor uttered those words. You don't remember Rossi picking you up and holding you. You don't remember the sad glances, the tears shed by your teammates. You don't remember the car ride to your now empty shared apartment. You don't remember lying down and sobbing into the pillow for hours.

No, you only remember the pain. The unbearable pain of loss.

He was gone. Really gone.

You cried and cried for hours on end. Until you had no tears left to shed. 

Then you just lied there, staring at the wall, gripping his favorite shirt in your arms, remembering every little moment with him.

And it hurt like hell just thinking of everything you did with him. The day you met. Your first kiss, your first date. The day he proposed. Your wedding. Every little thing. 

And you wouldn't be able to do anything else. You wouldn't have kids with him. You guys had just talked about having a baby just the other day. He wanted one so bad. 

You shouldn't have waited.

Because now, now he was gone.

* * *

The next few days were a blur. You found yourself with home-cooked meals overflowing your fridge. A team member at your house every night. But it was all a blur.

All meaningless without Aaron.

The funeral was coming up. You didn't make any arrangements, you asked Rossi if he could handle it and he quickly agreed. 

He had taken care of finding the casket, picking a place, and finding a burial site. Everything. 

The only thing you had asked for was a closed casket.

You couldn't handle looking at him.

* * *

On the day of the funeral, the girls all came over to help you get ready. 

"Alright y/n, do you have a dress?" Penny asked as she walked out of kitchen.

"In the closet." You croaked. Your voice being hoarse from the crying and lack of speaking for the past two weeks.

"Okay I'll grab that, and shoes. Jj is going to make you breakfast and Em is going to do your hair okay?" You gave her a sad smile and a small okay.

Penny quickly walked back your hallway as Em began pulling your hair back in a low ponytail. You felt the tears begin slipping down your face once again.

Jj saw as she walked back in the room with a bagel and coffee.

"Oh sweetheart." And the dam broke. They comforted you the best they could. But they couldn't even imagine what you were going through, because he was gone.

* * *

The funeral was a blur. It seemed like everything was these days. 

It was a beautiful service. You don't remember much. Lots of hugs and 'sorry for your loss's.

It had gone quickly, and soon you found yourself in Rossi's living room. Everyone but the team had left, you sat alone. The rest were in the kitchen cleaning up.

You didn't move from your spot, sipping your wine.

Everyone walked in, and found spots around you.

It was silent. Not a single word was spoken.

"I'm taking a leave of absence." You spoke.

6 pairs of eyes shot to you, but they couldn't say they were surprised.

"It's just too much. I'm not ready to come back." Your voice was quiet. Rossi was the first to say anything.

"Take all the time you need." 

* * *

And you did. You spent about 3 months in that apartment, alone and sad and heartbroken. 

But you realized that Aaron would never want you to live like this. And you really needed to be able to pay the bills.

So after those 3 months, you gave Rossi a call. He had become until chief since you had left, and he instantly accepted you back to the team.

You were slowly getting better. 

Each passing case a distraction. 

Each one fixing you just a bit more. 

Each one giving your life a purpose, a meaning again.

And you felt better. You stopped crying yourself to sleep. You stopped sitting in silence for hours on end. You stopped crying every time you thought about him.

But you still visited him every week. You still thought about him everyday. You still wore your wedding rings, refusing to take them off.

But you were better. 

* * *

A few more months went by and you started going out with the team again. You spent more time with them. Almost every weekend. And you were somewhat okay.

And it wasn't until about 8 months after his death did your world come to another crashing halt.

You had been called in to the BAU, not entirely sure why, but you came in none the less. 

You figured it was a case, but Jj hadn't specified on the phone, which was strange.

You had walked up to the conference room, and were surprised to see the whole team sitting there ready to go. 

"Hey guys, do we have a case?" You asked, but Jj sent you a sad look causing you to grow worried.

"Y/n, you should sit down for this." You had no idea what was going on. What on earth was happening. "Peter Raymond recently resurfaced, and was taken into custody this morning about an hour ago. He resisted arrest and pulled a gun on an officer. He was shot and killed." Your heart hammered in your chest. He was gone. The bastard who killed your husband was gone. Rossi stood walking towards Jj.

A pit grew in your stomach, there was more, something you didn't know.

"8 months ago I made a decision that greatly affected this team. Aaron Hotchner received substantial injuries from the wounds he endured, but his surgery was a success and he was airlifted to an unknown location. His identity was changed in order to keep him safe. But he is alive." 

You couldn't believe your ears. He was alive. Alive? 

Your eyes shot to the door and there he stood. 

Aaron Hotchner. 

You couldn't breathe. 

You couldn't move or speak. 

He was alive, you should be ecstatic.

But you only felt anger.

Your eyes shot to Rossi.

"How dare you." You whispered out, surprising the team. You weren't an angry person, you never yelled at your teammates. But you, you were seething. "How could you do that. You knew he was alive and yet you let me suffer. You watched as I cried day and night. You watched as I let myself go, as I lost myself." You shook your head in anger.

Aaron stepped forward reaching out for you, but you shook your head.

"Dont touch me. Don't fucking touch me." You felt the tears fall down your face. Again. "You left me. You're dead. You're gone. Y-you left." You were shaking and crying and once again Aaron reached out for you, but this time you let him.

He brought you into a crushing hug, holding you like you had begged to be held for months. 

He was here, really here. You could smell and feel and see him. He was really here.

"Y-you bastard. You left me." You whispered desperately as you cried into his shirt. 

The team was quick to disperse. They too were mad at Rossi, and they wanted to reunite with Hotch. But they left you be, at least for now.

Aaron pulled back slightly, looking down at you.

"Sweetheart I'm so sorry. I wish I didn't have to. But he would have killed you and then he would have killed me." He had tears running down his face as well now. But you were so angry at him.

You pushed him away.

"I could have gone with you Aaron. You could have gone into witsec. You didn't need to fake your fucking death Aaron!" You yelled at him. you couldn't even believe you were eating this conversation.

"Y/n please, I'm so sorry." You were mad yeah, but you were so overwhelmingly relieved that it overpowered your anger. "I missed you sweetheart." He whispered out and you broke just a little bit more.

"You bastard. Y-you stupid man." You pulled him back to you and slammed your lips together. "You stupid, stupid man." You gasped out between kisses. 

"I know, I'm so sorry. I love you." He stated after you pulled away.

"I-I love you too." You were sobbing at this point.. "Don't ever do that to me again." He nodded, leaning in to kiss you again.

And you kissed your husband.

Because he wasn't gone. 

He was right here.

And god did it feel amazing to have him back

------------

Thanks for reading! Requests are still open, so ask away! Currently I'm only taking requests from my prompt list, which is right here! School is starting up soon though, so i may not be writing very often, but i will definitely try! Anyways, if you would like to read more of my work, here is my masterlist.

[tanniefm]

nasty | jjk (m)

summary - you're needy at a party and no one can help you except your boyfriend jungkook.

pairing - jungkook x reader

genre - established relationship

word count - 2.4k

song inspo - nasty by ariana grande

warnings - unprotected sex (BOOO), dirty talk, daddy kink, brief breeding kink, slight voyeurism (you essentially ride his thigh in front of everyone), explicit language, praise kink, subspace, drug and alcohol use (weed), brief mention of vmin, i guess kook also falls into domspace too i mean y'all are high so

a/n - i'm sorry this took so long school's been kicking my ass bruh. this is also very unedited since i originally wrote this while horny like a month ago kanjwbw. anyways yeah enjoy! ps. i am very bad at endings and summaries sigh

♪°•°∞°•°♪°•°∞°•°♪°•°∞°•°♪°•°∞°•°♪♪°•°∞°•°♪°•°

“Pleaseeeee”

“Nope”

“But I need to so badly! Just please make me cum, Kook!”

“What did I say? Not ‘til later. At this rate I might not let you cum at all.” his words brought utter terror to your face. What did he mean not letting you cum at all? You've been so good all day! Just like he told you! This party fucking sucks anyway. As much as you love your friends coming over, there’s only so much you can handle before you start getting annoyed by their presence. Jungkook has been teasing you all day but the very peak of it was when he ate you out earlier like it was his last meal and at the very last second, decided to cease all contact from you and smile cockily. Asshole.

It doesn’t help that you've both been drinking and smoking a bit, so your horniness has only worsened since then. This mixed haze of being tipsy and high at the same time is just making you needier by the second. You’ve been clinging onto him and following him around your shared apartment the whole night while he laughed and chatted with your friends.

“You good, ____?” Jimin laughs. He out of everyone should know exactly how you feel, given him and Tae are constantly going at it, just like you and your beloved boyfriend.

You smile sarcastically, “Nah I’m perfectly fine, Minnie! Why do you ask?” you know exactly why he’s asking. You’re not really the best at hiding your emotions and your face says it all that you’d rather have everyone disappear immediately so you can fuck the shit out of the man you’re glaring at. He’s currently taking a few hits out of Hoseok’s “party bong” as he likes to call it. It looks very used and burnt out, you don’t know why he just won’t get a new one since you’re sure that’s some kind of safety hazard but whatever.

“No reason, just that you look like you wanna eat Jungkookie alive is all.” he smirks. You roll your eyes playfully and take another sip from whatever mixed drink Jungkook made you.

“He’s getting on my nerves.” you quip back. Jimin’s eyes crinkle as he laughs heartily. It seems like everyone finds your situation amusing but you. All you want is to have a proper orgasm! Is that so wrong! It feels like he’s punishing you and you haven’t even done anything! You go to sit on the couch with him, directly on his lap, while he watches Seokjin and Taehyung yell over Mario Kart. He automatically wraps his hands around your waist and smiles lazily.

“Heyy pretty girl.” he says gruffly. His voice always gets raspy when he smokes and your pussy throbs at his (and your) favorite pet name.

“Kookie,” you whine. “Please can we wrap this up and do something alone. Need you.” you start pouting in hopes he’ll finally cave. He chuckles and brushes a piece of hair from your face.

He leans in closely to whisper, “After they're done with this game, I promise I’ll take care of you, ok baby?” you look at him skeptically and hold up your pinky to ensure he means what he says. He giggles at your cuteness and wraps his long pinky around yours, kissing it to seal the deal. Your face immediately lights up at the prospect that you’ll finally get some dick. The more you think about it, the wetter you get. Maybe he’ll bring out the toys this time and use those on you. Maybe he’ll overstimulate you until you beg him to stop. Maybe he’ll let you take control since he’s been messing with you all evening anyway. The possibilities are endless and they cause you to squirm around on his lap. You quickly realize that your leggings are pretty thin however as you suddenly pause when you feel that your boyfriend is hard as a rock. Little did you know that he’s been suffering just as much as you have, he just likes to play with you a little to see how needy you could get. He can feel you throbbing through your leggings and it’s been driving him fucking crazy. He can’t wait for the guys to leave so he can fuck you in every room of this house.

He grips your hips tightly and gives you a warning look of “do that again and see what happens” you whimper and tuck your face in his neck. He smells so good. You can faintly smell the weed you two have been smoking but you can still smell his soft detergent and calming lavender he loves so much. You know his nose is sensitive so he only uses a small amount of cologne and it encapsulates him so perfectly. He pulls you closer and starts bouncing his knee slightly. Fuck. Now his thigh is consistently hitting your clit and your mind is getting fuzzier. The haze from earlier coupled with the fact that Jungkook is bouncing you like a baby is starting to make you whimper and moan a little louder than you’d like to. You know he’s fucking with you again. He loves seeing you like this. He leans down and reminds you Tae and Jin are almost done with their game and then you can moan and whine all you want. You nod hastily while you suck a mark into his neck to keep quiet. His knee keeps the same casual pace, as if your clit isn’t the main focal point of each bounce. He kisses the top of your head and laughs along at whatever the boys are arguing about as to not raise any suspicion. Although you’re pretty sure everyone can tell exactly what’s going on. The fact that everyone can clearly see you getting bounced on your boyfriend's lap is only getting you closer and closer. You bet you could cum like this.

“Ha ha! Fuck you, hyung! I told you I’d win!” Taehyung shouts jovially.

“Yeah whatever, brat! I’m definitely winning next time.” they both get up and stretch before informing both of you that they think they’ll call it a night. The rest of the boys agree and gather their stuff to head out. You hate to say it, but you couldn’t be happier that everyone’s finally leaving. Jungkook lifts you off his lap gently and to your horror, you can already see a damp spot forming on his sweats. He smirks and winks at you while he kindly escorts everyone out. Once the last person is gone and the door is closed and locked, he turns around and tells you to come here. You scamper over to him in a haste and attach your lips to his in an instant. He laughs at your neediness and backs you slowly to the couch. He sits down and puts you in his lap again while you both make out as if you’ve been deprived of each other. He grips your hips and grinds you against his erection that’s been straining against his pants for the better part of half an hour.

“My poor baby, was I too mean today?” he asks as he kisses down your neck and jaw.

“Mhm, I’ve been a good girl all day just like you said and you don’t even care.” you whine. He lifts his head and cups your face.

“Of course I care, baby. I’m so proud of you for being so good today. You want daddy to take care of you now, don’t you?” he says gently. It looks like you’re not the only one that fell into a bit of a headspace. You’re very aware that when Jungkook starts referring to himself as daddy that he’s already taken a dominant position. Meaning he’ll take very little shit from you. Not that you felt like being bratty today anyway. Good girls get rewarded and that’s exactly what you intend to receive. You nod and grind against him faster in hopes he’ll get the hint that you want him now. As always, he quickly understands and starts ridding himself of his shirt as you take off yours. Seeing all of his tattoos always does things to you. Especially the small bouquet of black roses he got for you. You still can’t believe he would get something so permanent on his body just for you but he was adamant that you were the love of his life. The memory made you emotional as you started to tear up slightly. You’re going to have to ask Hoseok what the hell was in that strain to make you so sensitive to literally everything. Jungkook stops unclipping your bra as soon as he sees your eyes well up.

His hands are right back to their position on your face. “Woah, what happened love? Are you ok?” you wipe your eyes and giggle bashfully and explain why you got so worked up. He smiled and kissed you softly.

“You know I love you, right? You’re so fucking cute. I love you so much.” he says as he leans his forehead on yours. Weed makes both of you so sappy. You can’t even find it in yourself to care as you bring him into another kiss. He continues to take off your bra and starts kneading your breasts in his hands. The action makes you whine and pull away from him.

“Daddy, I wanna cum now. Please?”

He chuckles and lifts you off of him to strip your leggings. His fingers trace over the damp spot of your panties and he pulls them back to see how wet they’ve gotten.

“My little girl completely soaked through these. Needy baby. If you wanted it so bad why couldn’t you just do it yourself, huh?”

“B-because I wanted to be good. M’ a good girl right?” his words confused you. Why would you take care of yourself when he does it so much better. Plus, wouldn’t he just punish you anyway?

“I know baby, you are a good girl. Besides, those tiny little fingers would just frustrate you wouldn't they? You need daddy to cum ‘cause my dumb babygirl can’t do anything by herself, can she?” his words make your lip tremble as you nod dumbly. He’s right! You couldn’t possibly do something like that by yourself. Only he can make you feel like this.

He smiles as you agree with no hesitation and pecks all around your face. This is your favorite place to be in. In his arms waiting for his instruction. Taking the lead is fun every once and awhile but being stupid and pliant is far more your speed. He makes you feel safe and adored. He makes you feel good.

His fingers swirl around your covered clit as you moan into his mouth. Your little noises and the feeling of his fingers getting slicker is making him painfully hard and he, too is getting impatient. He wiggles his hips and slides his sweats down to reveal to you that he’s been walking around with no underwear on. He’s been completely hard with no barrier other than his sweats. You feel like you could bust right then and there. As soon as you see his cock, you lick your hand and start stroking it slowly. Jungkook hisses and throws his head back.

“Little girl...don’t play with me right now…” you heed his warning and scramble to take off your panties so you can get him inside you as fast as possible. This is what you’ve been waiting for, and you’ll be damned if you fuck it up now. He steadies you as you prepare to sink down on him and he kisses you gently. The way he’s filling you is intoxicating.

“Fuck, this little cunt was made for me wasn’t it? My baby’s so perfect for me.” his words make you tremble. You both moan breathily once he’s bottomed out inside you. You grind back and forth slowly as you try to adjust to his length. Jungkook however, is just as impatient as you are. He halts your movements to grip your hips and lift you almost completely off of him and slam you back down. You gasp as he sets a pace for you quickly. Your walls clench as he groans out praises of how good you feel and how much he loves being with you like this. In his lap, bouncing on top of him, whining into his neck. He couldn't think of a better place to be. His hands slide down to your ass and grips it as he bounces you even faster. You moan loudly and bite on his shoulder in fear of getting another noise complaint from the neighbors.

“D-Daddy? M’ close. So so so so so close daddy please fuck!” your words are slurred since you literally cannot think properly. He laughs breathily. “I know baby, you feel so good. Fuck I wanna pump you full of my cum. Wanna get you pregnant.” his words only make you moan louder.

“Oh you like that? You like when I talk about filling your cute tummy with my cum? You want my babies, little girl? Hm?” your head bobs up and down as you nod. “Yeah- mm yeah want it so bad daddy please cum in me. I wanna have your babies please Kookie please. Wanna cum wanna cum wanna cum!” you whine. Seeing how absolutely wrecked you are is only getting Jungkook closer and closer. You look completely and utterly fucked out. If his baby wants his cum that's exactly what she'll get.

“Shh precious I’m almost there. Daddy's got you I promise. Rub your pretty clit for me, I wanna see my baby cum ok?” you immediately obey and spit on your fingers before shoving your hand between you two. You rub your swollen clit with quick flicks to get you to cum faster. You just wanna make Jungkook happy. You wanna be his good girl.

It didn't take long for your hand coupled with his cock pounding into your g-spot to get you to cum hard on him. Your limbs spasm and your vision goes white while you distantly hear Jungkook's moaned praises. He cums in you not long after with a whine and keeps thrusting a few times so you can milk him for all he's worth. You both pant heavily as his arms wrap around you tightly, wanting to be as close as possible. He pecks your head repeatedly and buries his face in your hair.

“I love you ____.” he sighs. You giggle and sleepily look up at him. “I love you more.”

[sunsents]

The Cardigan - F.W 18+

My first ever post and it's a goddamn smut one shot. This has been in my Wattpad drafts for way too long (wrote it three-four months ago), it's not the best, and I'm not proud of the writing but et eez what et eez. I really wan't to start publishing my work and gotta start somewhere. Also the smut is shitty, and the dirty talk is just goddamn vile. Also I'm a horny mf.

Summary ---> "Is that mine? You look better in it than me, that's for sure." An intimate night with Fred after you guys find the house all to yourselves. This is just pure filth, like scroll if you wan't plot. 🌚

Pairing: fred weasley/fem!reader

Word count: 2.3k

Warnings: smut / overstim if u squint / cursing / thigh tiding / dirty talk / fred being a horny little shit / an attempt at innuendos / hand-job / cum play (?) / like one ass slap

Rating: 18+

DON'T REPOST MY WORK

The bathroom at the Weasley's were quite cramped, but you didn't care. Your shower was more than satisfactory, the wavering smell of Mrs. Weasley cooking downstairs mixing with the wonderful scent of Fred's shampoo. The hot water loosened all your fatigued muscles - those extra hours out on the field playing Quidditch was worth it - your muscles were taut, flexing wonderfully whenever you lifted your arm to rinse off the products in your hair.

When you opened the door of the bathroom, clouds of hot air escaping and surrounding the small corridor, you were surprised to hear no footsteps, loud chattering of your friends and the usual plates clinking in the kitchen. You figured going downstair naked wouldn't be a good idea, and entered Ginny's room.

The disheveled bedroom was empty, and you looked out the window to the vast garden and wheat fields that got darker with the hot summer night approaching. There was no sign of anyone and you were starting to get anxious. Maybe it was because of the unusual silence - the Weasley household always had some kind of chaos happening - nevertheless, you quickly slipped on some satin shorts and a soft, white knit sweater to keep the evening breezes at bay. After swiftly drying your hair with a towel - you were letting it air dry, Cosmopolitan said Cindy Crawford did it - you applied whatever product was routine for your body and left the room.

Your magical radio was playing a soft jazz from the den and immediate relief washed over you when you stepped downstairs. The creams and perfumes that stuck to your skin wafted around the air and filled the rooms with delicious essences, and your soft socks slipped and slid across the wooden floor to the kitchen as you pushed yourself with ease. You quickly caught yourself with a chair and laughed, being alone wasn't so bad, you figured you could find ways to entertain yourself.

Until, a low chuckle from the den caused you to yelp and almost fall on your ass, merlin forbid. You couldn't bear another injury after George two left feet Weasley accidentally kicked you on the shin while playing Quidditch.

Speaking of Weasley, Fred Weasley was sprawled out on the couch, wearing only his boxers and a long, loosely knitted cardigan sitting on his exposed skin. You felt your mouth water, his head was lazily thrown back, exposing his curved neck and Adam's apple, his freckles more noticeable than ever. He was staring at you, his lips tugging a smile and enjoying the show you put on. Humiliation, is what it was. You were sliding around floorings like Madame Maxine on ice.

Your blood suddenly felt on like liquid fire, and you opened the cupboards to get yourself a glass of water. "Aguamenti," you casted, and from the corner of your eye you saw Fred's gaze set on your exposed legs, trailing up to your ass that was slightly exposed from the length of your shorts. They rode up more when you stood on your toes to place the cup back on the shelf after chugging the liquid down and muttering a cleaning spell.

"Is that mine?" you cleared your throat, finishing up in the kitchen and walking over to one of the rocking chairs. You didn't know why Fred was sitting around practically naked - you didn't question because he was Fred Weasley and you were tired. You weren't complaining etiher.

"Yeah," Fred said breathlessly. "It's surprisingly comfortable."

"You look better than me in it, that's for sure." You chuckled darkly, eyeing his provocative muscles. The hickeys you had left from a few days ago were slightly healed, soft reds trailing his nape and they weren't helping the growing desire between your legs. "Where is everyone?" you asked.

Fred quickly noticed your poorly hidden lustful stares and moved the cardigan away with a sly smirk, revealing more of his abs and flexed thighs. "They went out to Diagon Ally, won't be back until ten." he said. You nodded then took a deep, shaky breath and picked up a magazine from the coffee table. You settled in your mind that maybe looking through the new season Versace bikinis would calm your lust.

Fred let out a long, erotic sigh, allowing a soft groan to escape his lips along the way. Your hand twitched, you were still oblivious to his intentions and crossed your legs for some friction. "Hey ____," Fred called out, and you hummed in response, not looking up from your magazine. You seemed to have read the same line five times now. "I think there's something in my eye, can you blow on it."

Your eyes went wide, Fred was vulgar. This was no surprise to you after dating him for almost two years, but saying something so shamelessly, no hesitation still made your heart stutter. Your imagination was running wild now, you pictured every single thing you wished to do to him at this moment, in those clothes. You quickly put your magazine down, more of slapped it on the table. "Sure, yeah." you said in a shaky voice, then stood up and walked over to him.

Fred's arms were wide on the couch, and one of them pulled your hand down when he was able to reach you. Your heart stopped for a moment, you felt herself land harshly on his thigh and the impact on your core caused a groan from the back of your throat to slip out.

Fred was rather enjoying himself, his head lazily leaning back on the pillow as he rubbed your thighs up and down, digging the pads of his fingers into your skin and causing an embarrassingly load of your juices to flow to your newly worn panties.

You readjusted yourself so the heat between your legs weren't in direct contact with his thigh. You scooted closer and had to bite back a moan when Fred jerked his leg up and applied pressure on your clit. You were trying your best not to show his effect on you, "Which eye." you hissed through gritted teeth, still pursuing his obvious lie.

Fred's shit eating grin only grew wider, and he took your hand and placed it right on his crotch. He was hard beneath his boxers, swelling bigger the second and you were fighting the urge to palm his cock. You shot him a warning look to which he playfully frowned, then gestured to his right eye. You leaned in closer, maybe he really did have something in his eye.

Fred's breathing was heavy, fanning over your lips as you tried to take a closer look. Your inspection was cut short when he gripped your waist, riding up your sweater to touch you directly. You gasped and straightened up at his rough hands kneading around your stomach. Chills were racing down your spine, you didn't want to give in just yet, just for teasing purposes, but Fred was making it unbelievable hard with his tousled hair and hooded eyes boring into yours.

Your panties felt soaked and you hoped he wouldn't notice, but when Fred gripped your shorts and pulled them down, his eyes fell on the wet fabric that was stuck to your entrance. You were painfully aware of how aroused you were, and your heated cheeks weren't helping with your embarrassment.

Fred licked his lips - his expression lust crazed - then he gripped one of your legs and guided it around his thighs, making you straddle him. He held both of your thighs and pulled you in closer, and when your knee touched his boner, it caused him to groan lowly and attempt to close the small gap between your two bodies.

You marveled at the idea of being any more closer to him, the aching on your lower abdomen making you grind yourself on his thigh, whimpering at the much needed friction. The scene looked erotic to you, Fred's finger had slithered down to your panties and moved them to the side to expose all of you, flushed and swollen. He gripped your waist again and started rocking your body on his thigh, "Ride my thigh baby, wan't you to get off on me," he said huskily, "Slow and good~"

You didn't know what else to do other than nod as much agreeable a nod could get. Fred started guiding your hips at a slow pace, not letting you fasten it once. He tutted when you tried for the second time, "Stop being impatient my love." he crooned, straightening himself up to finally meet your lips.

But you barely responded.

You were slack-jawed, your clit swollen painfully, your hips swiveling to get more contact. Pathetic really, is what it was. Fred said few words of filth and here you were, panting and rutting, thanking whoever up there to have the opportunity to ride Fred's obscenely attractive thigh. A thigh shouldn't be this attractive you thought, his skin warm and comfortable, generous muscles teasingly helping you get off. Emphasis on teasingly, he wouldn't let you have anything that easily. It was heaven and hell all at once.

Fred was sensually tracing the outline of your mouth with his tongue all the while, then dipped down and feathered kisses on your jaw that was just as slow as his pace. "Fuck, you're so filthy for this. Who knew this is all it took?" he groaned.

"You have such a responsive cunt babe, I can do whatever I want and you just lose it. Fuck-"

You were growing more frustrated the second and Fred was getting rather talkative, he ran his nose down your collarbones, sucking the supple skin into his mouth and leaving crimson marks. "Freddie please - just, mmmh!" you cried out a strangled moan, you had finally gotten what you wanted. You knew Fred could never resist the nickname, and in such a tone too.

He had started to rub your clit, his other arm wrapping around the small of your back protectively. He groaned against your neck, sending shockwaves of pleasure trailing from your marked neck all down to your feet. But Fred wasn't stupid, he had caught on rather soon and chuckled.

"Bad girl." he mocked, then gave you a light smack on your ass, causing you to yelp and jump. You landed harshly on Fred's thigh again and the moan you let out was almost painful. You clutched onto his hair as he gripped your waist and continued to rock you on his thigh.

You let him guide your movement, your juices easily allowing you to slide yourself back and forth on him, and whenever Fred would pull you forward he would apply pressure on your clit by gripping your waist tighter and pushing you down. He fastened his pace with every grind, and every huff of air you let out when your hips would come in contact. "Oh fucking hell - yes," Fred heaved, your knee must've been grazing against his cock just right because he was letting out soft groans and curse words every other second, his hefty length visible behind the fabric.

You couldn't resist, he had such an attractive dick even after seeing it so many times. You started rubbing him from the outside of his boxers, digging the pads of your fingertips into his shaft whenever you could. Fred's head rested between the slope of your breasts, and his hips bucked up at your touch, rutting desperately into your fisted hand, causing you to loudly moan out when his thigh pressed on your swollen bud.

He was barely jutting your hips at this point, barely able to focus on your pleasure from the amount he was getting. Cocky attitude gone as soon as you touched him, you made him melt under your palm. "I love you so fucking much - ohhh...holy shit, keep rubbing me like that." he moaned against your skin, the intense vibrations making you shudder.

You started to move by yourself, quickly and desperately, your juices glazing the skin and soaking up your panties that was making it harder for you both. But it felt too good to stop and remove it, the heat in your core was growing and you closed your eyes to focus on the man that was letting out hot breaths between the valley of your breasts. His hand started playing with your nipple, squeezing it between his forefinger and thumb as the other gripped your waist and rocked you faster.

Your movement was getting sloppy, legs trembling and jerking whenever pressure was applied to your clit. You were whining the name of your lover, your voice almost pornographic. "Cum my love - fuck yes, cum all over me. Make a mess of me." Fred's hand left your nipple and guided your hips faster, the other pulling down on your thighs as you threw your head back. Fred started circling your clit to speed up your fast approaching release, but it wasn't even needed.

With a final, high pitched squeal, your vision went black, stars dancing around your lids. Your body shuddered violently, and you came hard all over his thigh. "You look so beautiful I-" Fred barely managed to let out before you gripped down his boxers and let his erection swing out. You wrapped your hand around the head and watched in amusement as pre-cum leaked out when you squeezed.

"What? Gonna milk me dry baby?" Fred chuckled darkly, his free hand running through his tousled hair while the other gripped and kneaded the side of your waist.

"I was hoping to do more than that, but for now..." you licked a long stripe up the base of his neck to the back of his ear, and bit. All the while, your hand started working around his painfully hard cock.  Fred was almost heaving now, unlike you who just recently came down from your mind blowing orgasm.

"I-...please, I wan't-" Fred gulped, and in the very rare moments he didn't know what to say. You started pumping his cock, the moment you squeezed him tighter he was coming.

"Fuck fuck fuck - ____!" Fred released all over your hand, his dick twitching beneath your fingers as he leaned his body on yours and let out strangled moans against your neck. You licked your fingers clean, then gently lifted Fred's chin. His eyes were slanted in a deep post-orgasmic daze, and you started to give him slow, wet kisses. "Look how good you taste." you whispered, swirling your tongue around his as he groaned into your mouth.

You were obsessed with how mesmerizing Fred looked. When he came, when he cried out whatever filthy thing came to mind, that blissful glow he had after orgasming. You wanted to repeat those moments over and over again, come with him yourself and touch yourself to his noises. And his taste, you could never get enough of it.

[moon-light-jukebox]

Don’t Go - [Reid x Reader]

masterlist

Summary: After being tortured by Tobias Hankel, Dr. Spencer Reid is struggling and everyone can see it. Reader can’t bear his pain and tries to comfort him...only to be heartbroken when he says their night meant nothing.  

Pairing: Spencer Reid / Fem!Reader

Rating: Mature

Word Count: 10.6k

Genre: Angst. Angst. Angst. But fluff at the end cause I’m not a monster. 

Content Warning: Talk of drug use, language, penetrative sex, oral sex (female receiving), and just angst. All the angst. Get tissue. 

A/n: This is set over the arc of episodes  2x16 - 2x18. A special thank you to @imjusthereformggcontent and @catsadams for reading through the beginning of this in its first form. You’re both angels.  I hope this is everything y’all wanted it to be, my doves. Thank you for sticking with me. 

Request prompt: Can you write a fic where Spencer is high on dilaudid and tells you that your night together was nothing and that you're nothing to him. Then the next day he can't rember telling you and and he can't figure out why you are avoiding him.

-- Don’t Go -- 

The first indication I got that today wasn’t going to be normal came when Special Agent Grant Anderson shuffled into my office just after 9:30 am. He didn’t knock before he entered and then shut the door quickly behind him.

I glanced up from the paperwork in front of me, my eyebrows scrunched together in confusion. “Something on your mind, Special Agent?” I teased.

Ever since Anderson made a mistake that led to SSA Elle Greenaway being shot a few months ago, a lot of people on this floor had been giving him the cold shoulder, despite the fact that Greenaway had forgiven him before she left the BAU.

When I first joined the bureau and was assigned to this unit, Anderson had been my first friend. He was there for me when I felt nervous and like I was a complete imposter. He’s the reason I was still a member of this team; I’d never turn my back on him.

“Something’s up with Reid.”

I propped both of my elbows on the desk, my chin resting on my folded hands. “Well, he was just abducted and tortured. That’s gonna have an effect on someone.”

Anderson was already shaking his head before I got done speaking. “This is different. I just tried to talk to him while he was getting some coffee. I asked him about David Tennant taking over as The Doctor and he…he snapped at me, y/l/n.”

Okay, that’s odd. “Maybe he just didn’t feel like talking,” I defended. “He was tortured, Grant.”

“I’ve known him since I started here. He’s…something is wrong.”

I leaned back, crossing my arms over my chest. “It can’t be anything too bad. I mean, he’s surrounded by profilers. His mentor is Jason Gideon for god’s sake. If something was wrong, they’d know.”

Anderson walked forward and braced his palms on my desk, his eyes boring into mine.

“Dr. Spencer Reid is also one of the best profilers in the world. I’m telling you, y/n, something is wrong.”

I conceded with a sigh. “What do we do?”

“I think you should talk to him.”

My spine stiffened. “Me? Why?” But I knew why.

Anderson scoffed. “You know how he looks at you. And I know how you look at him.”

Dr. Spencer Reid’s nervousness around me could have been blamed on many things, Anderson insisted it meant he liked me. I wasn’t convinced…because I saw how he looked at JJ.

How I looked at Reid was obvious. He was the most brilliant man I had ever met, he was kind, sweet, and his eyes sparkled when he talked about something he loved. My heart fluttered when he realized he was rambling and he blushed, and my day was made whenever he would seek me out to talk to me.

I had a crush on Spencer Reid.

“Alright,” I said. “I’ll talk to him.”

He shot me a relieved smile and backed away from the desk. “Sooner than later, please.”

Such a sassy bitch, I thought as he shut the door.

--

It was well after 6 pm when I gathered my things to leave the office that day. I had been hired as one of the many, many agents that worked under JJ. Media liaison wasn't her only role; she also fielded hundreds of requests for FBI assistance every week. It was my job to go through those requests, make initial judgments, and then send out responses.

I had always been happier working behind the scenes, so a job filled with paperwork suited me just fine. All I wanted to do was help catch bad guys, and with the BAU I felt like I was making a difference.

Speaking to Reid had been on my mind all day, but I had expected that I'd have the night to think up a plan of attack then talk to him first thing in the morning, but when I walked past the bullpen I saw him at his desk.

The entire floor appeared to be empty apart from him. His shoulders were hunched, his head resting in his hands.

I was opening the doors before I realized what was happening. I had crossed the distance until I was standing in front of him before I even knew what I was going to say.

“Reid,” I said softly. I almost touched him, but I didn’t think he’d like that. He didn’t seem to like to be touched.

His head snapped up; the circles under his eyes were darker than normal, his hair was messier than usual, and his clothing was in disarray. He cleared his throat, his tongue running over his dry lips.

He didn’t say anything, but he didn’t need to.

"I can't imagine what you're going through," I began, standing at the end of his desk. "I don't even know how to begin to think about it. So, I won't ask you to talk about it. I won't ask you to talk at all. I just…I just want you to know that I'm here if you just want a friend. If you want to grab some coffee and talk about nothing…whatever."

Those warm brown eyes were duller than I’d ever seen them, but they ran over my entire body quizzically, like he wasn’t sure I was even there.

After a beat, I decided it was best to leave him to it. I couldn't force him to accept my offer…not that I would force him even if I could. "Goodnight, Reid."

I turned and made my way back to the double glass doors of the bullpen. I hadn’t heard him move, so I was completely thrown off guard when his hand wrapped around my wrist. My eyes looked up to meet his, confusion plain on my face.

His eyes weren't dull anymore, they were shimmering but not in any way I ever wanted to see. He swiped at his cheek angrily when the first tear fell. "Don't go," he rasped.

I won’t.  

--

We didn’t speak as we took the elevator down to the lobby. It was only when we reached the front doors of the building that I spoke. “Where do you want to go?”

He scratched at his forearm, his eyes moving over the room behind us like he was expecting someone to run out from any direction. I wasn't a profiler, but I recognized hypervigilance when I saw it.

“I don’t know. Not here.”

I nodded. “Alright. Do you want to go…get food? Coffee?” He shook his head, his hands now picking at the threads of the cardigan he wore. “We could go for a walk?”

“I…” He cleared his throat, his eyes rising to meet mine. “I don’t want to be around a lot of people right now.”

“Okay, we can-“

“But,” he interrupted. “I…I’m afraid to be alone, y/n. I’m…I’m so fucking afraid.”

I reached for him only to still my hand at the last second, millimeters away from touching him. “I won’t leave you alone, Reid.” My teeth dug into my lower lip as I thought. “We could go to your apartment. Or mine.” I quickly added when I saw how his eyes widened at the mention of his place.

“I…I don’t want to go home.” He licked his lips again, shifting his weight from foot to foot.

“Then you don’t have to go home right now. We’ll go to my place. We can order dinner, watch a movie, or we can do nothing. It’s up to you.”

The look of relief on his face, combined with the smile he sent me warmed up a part of my heart I didn’t even know was cold.

--

The ride to my apartment was mostly silent; I had turned the radio on for background noise. Spencer’s eyes kept staring out of my passenger side window while his hands twisted in his lap.

He followed behind me quietly when we entered my building, then took the elevator up to my apartment. Spencer’s eyes glided over my apartment, taking in the photos of my friends and family on the walls, the throw pillows on my couch, and the titles on my bookshelf.

I went into the kitchen to get us both a bottle of water only to find him standing in the same spot when I returned.

“Are you hungry?”

He shook his head.

“Okay, do you want to sit down?”

He nodded, following me over to my couch. I curled my feet up under myself, my hands folded in my lap. “Spencer…I know I said you don’t have to talk, and you don’t. But…I want to help. I just…I want to do anything I can to help you.” I let out a breath, embarrassed that my voice was already thick with tears. “If that means sitting here beside you and just staring at the wall that’s fine. I…I just want to help.”

Reid’s head swiveled over to face me, those beautiful brown eyes were frightened. “Tobias…he…he hurt me. And I can still feel it,” he whispered, his voice raw even in that hushed volume. “It’s all I feel. I just…I don’t want to hurt anymore, y/n. I can’t stand it.”

I couldn’t stop myself from rising up on my knees and moving towards him. “Can I hug you? Is that okay?”

The words weren’t out of my mouth before he wrapped his arms around my middle, laying his head against my chest. When the first sob wracked through his body, I felt something inside of me crack. The second sob triggered my own.

I didn't know what had happened to him, and if I did know, I don't think I would ever truly understand. But the agony he was in affected me more than any pain I had ever felt myself.

My fingers ran through his hair, tugging at the soft tangles. His hair is curly, I thought absentmindedly. He always wore it slicked down…but it was curly.

Spencer finally quieted after a few moments, his sobs turning into sniffles. “Thank you.”

I gave a broken chuckle. “Don’t thank me for caring about you, Spencer.”

He pulled his head back to look at me, his eyes moving over my cheeks. “You cried for me.”

I nodded.

“Why?”

The question was so unexpected that I wasn’t prepared to do anything but tell the truth. “It hurts me to see you hurt.”

Spencer looked at me for a moment longer, absorbing my words before his palm came up and cupped my jaw, his thumb wiping my left-over tears away. He gentled pulled my head down until my lips pressed against his. Our first kiss was tender, his lips were slightly chapped but still unbelievably soft. Something about this kiss broke my heart more than his tears did.

My hands had come up to cup his face, my actions a mirror of his own. “I…I don’t want to take advantage of you, Spencer,” I mumbled out when we had pulled apart.

He chuckled softly. “You’re worried about that?” His mood became somber when I nodded. “Y/n…you know how I look at you. Everyone does. I don’t…I don’t want this if you don’t. I don’t want you to do this out of pity-“

“Spencer,” I gasped. “I would never…I’d never touch you out of pity. I-I want to touch you. I have for a long time.”

you. I have for a long time.”

Tears started to shine in his eyes again at my words. “Then please touch me, y/n. I don’t want to feel this pain anymore. I just…I just want to feel how I feel when you hold me. It-It doesn’t hurt when you touch me.”

Our lips came together the second time in understanding and hope. My mouth brushed against his with a promise that I was touching him because I wanted to. He sucked my bottom lip into his mouth, his teeth nibbling on it while his hands wove into my hair.

I moved to straddle his lap, my knees on either side of him, while my hands started working on the buttons of his shirt.

Spencer’s tongue ghosted against my lips; the groan he gave when I immediately let him inside made my core throb.

He froze when I started to push his shirt off his shoulders. “What is it?”

“It’s…I don’t want you to see…what he did to me. Please?”

I moved off of him quickly, extending my hand to pull him from the couch. I led him down the hall to my bedroom, not turning on the overhead light when we entered; the only source of light was a sliver of moonlight through the curtains.

“You don’t have to show me anything you don’t want to,” I whispered. “Do you…”

His lips crushed against mine, his hands grabbing my hips to pull me against his body. Those long fingers started working my shirt up my body, breaking away momentarily to pull it over my head.

Once my pants were down my thighs, he pushed me back onto the bed. He had removed his cardigan but left his button-up shirt on. I reached behind myself to unhook my bra, feeling a sudden nervousness rise up in my chest.

His fingers were warm when they brushed over my collarbones, drifting down over my breasts. “You’re beautiful,” he murmured.

I pulled him on top of me when I leaned back on the bed, our lips meeting in a heated frenzy. He palmed my breast, his thumb brushing over my nipple, causing me to arch up against him.

Spencer’s lips moved down until he was mouthing my neck, his teeth nipping at the skin, all the while his hand ghosted down my body until his fingers hooked on the top of my panties.

His head lifted, his eyes searching mine. “Can I touch you?”

I nodded, my hand moving atop his, guiding him inside my panties; I couldn’t control my gasp when his fingers parted my folds to brush against me.

My hands went to his belt. “I-is this okay?”

He nodded, his mouth coming down to cover the tip of my breast, his tongue teasing my nipple to a point. Those long fingers gathered wetness from my opening to bring it up to circle my clit. Ever the scientist, Spencer paid attention to every reaction I had, he wanted to learn how to touch me.

When his middle and ring finger entered me, his palm grinding against my clit, I finally got his pants open. My hand snacked inside to palm his cock, pulling a grown from him.

“Can I push these down a bit?”

“Please,” he breathed, his lips coming over mine.

His pants were down to his mid-thighs before I wrapped my hand around him. He was bigger than I expected, not overly thick, but longer than anyone I had been with before.

“Y/n,” he whimpered against my lips, his fingers speeding up inside of me.

I gave a few pumps, my movements uncoordinated. “I want to feel you inside me, Spence. Please?”

Reid groaned, removing his fingers from my heat. “Do you have a condom?”

I turned to my bedside table, fumbling in the darkness. When I turned back to face him, I saw two of his fingers in his mouth. The same two fingers that had just been inside of me.

“Jesus,” I breathed out, finding the sight of him sucking my arousal off his fingers incredibly erotic.

He took the condom from me, his lips quirking up in a smile. "I've…I've never done that before." His eyes moved down to my still covered pussy. "I want to…but I-I don't want this time to be worse for you than it has to be," he said with a self-deprecating chuckle.

"Hey," I muttered, my hands cupping that well-defined jaw. "This isn't going to be bad for me, Spencer. Just being with you is wonderful."

My words felt heavy in the air. Because they were true.

Spencer swallowed thickly, rolling the condom down over his length. I tugged my panties off, leaving me totally bare to him, while he still had most of his clothing on.

Even with that weird detail, this was still wonderful; being with Spencer like this was…everything.

I gripped him, lining him up at my entrance. His forehead dropped against mine when he started to push inside of me.

“Spence,” I breathed, my hands clutching at his hips.

“Are you okay?” he panted.

“Better than okay. You feel so good.”

He huffed out a laugh. “I don’t think anything could feel better than…fuck.” His slim hips pressed against mine when he was fully sheathed inside of me.

I felt my pussy flutter at his words. I’d never heard Spencer curse like that before.

We started a steady pace; his thrusts were even, and my hips rose to meet them. His arms were braced on either side of my head, his lips brushing against mine while he fucked me.

Calling it fucking seemed wrong. It was so much more.

“Y/n,” he groaned. “I’m close.”

My hand squeezed down between our bodies to rub my clit. “Hold on. I’m almost there.” I whined out.

His moan seemed to tingle across my skin when he dropped his head against my shoulder. “I want to feel you cum, baby.”

I whimpered at his words. “Spencer, harder. I need it harder.”

His hips snapped against mine as he slammed into me, I felt his teeth on the tender skin where my neck and shoulder met for a second before he bit down.

The mix of pain with pleasure sent me over the edge. My pussy clamped down on him as I found my own orgasm, pulling him over the edge with me.

My fingers ran over his back, scratching at the material of his shirt. I breathed his name out over and over while I floated back down from my high.

I felt his tongue soothe over the bite mark he had just given me as he gave a few more jerks inside of me before pulling out. He placed the sweetest kiss against my lips and when he pulled back, his eyes were shining, but not with tears this time.

--

After we cleaned up, we ordered take out and watched some sci-fi movie that was on cable. I couldn’t tell you a thing about it; I was too busy watching Spencer’s face when he told me all about it. I was enraptured by his voice, the way his hands moved.

He was so beautiful.

Before I was ready, I realized that it was already approaching midnight. “It’s late,” I said.

He nodded. “I should go.”

It was childish, but I couldn’t stop my lip from jutting out in a pout, causing him to laugh.

“What is it, beautiful?” he questioned, his voice teasing.

I shoved his shoulder. “Don’t ‘beautiful’ me, Spencer Reid,” I scolded, delighted when he laughed. “I just…I’m not ready for you to go.”

Something in Spencer’s eyes changed. He seemed almost relieved at my words. “I’m not ready to go either.”

I leaned over, placing a soft kiss in the center of his lips. “Then don’t go.”

--

Spending the night with Spence was worth how early I had to wake up the following morning to drive him by his apartment before work. I had offered to wait and give him a ride to work, but he had gotten a text from Garcia. They had gotten called to Houston for a case; Morgan was going to swing by and get him.

“I’ll call you when I can,” he promised, cupping my face when he kissed me goodbye.

The circles under his eyes this morning weren’t as dark as they had been before.

--

I could barely contain my excitement when we got the notification that the team was headed back. Part of me felt silly for being so excited. I mean, it was just one night; but it hadn’t felt like just one night.

Spencer hadn’t called me during the few days he’d been in Texas, but I hadn’t really expected him to. If anyone understood his job, it was someone who worked with his team. The BAU was such an elite unit within the FBI for a reason; they would stop at nothing to solve a case.

When the glass doors of the bullpen opened and I saw Hotch stride in, heading for his office, I couldn’t contain my smile.

“I saw that,” Anderson muttered.

I reached out and smack his arm. “You wanted me to talk to Reid.”

He nodded, biting the inside of his cheek. “And judging by that mark on your neck you did more than talk.”

I scowled at him. “See if I’m on your side the next time you fuck up,” I teased, knowing he wouldn’t take my words to heart.

He just offered me a wide smile. That’s how Anderson had lasted so long here, he never really held onto anything.

“Your man doesn’t look so good,” he said suddenly.

I turned, my eyes seeking out Spencer. He was right, the dark circles were back under his eyes, his clothes were wrinkled, his hair sticking up in every direction.

He never turned his head in my direction.

--

I had wanted to give Spencer some space when he first arrived back. What if something about this case had affected him? I thought that maybe that was the reason he had been avoiding me.

My department always had more paperwork than usual when the team came back from a case, so I wasn’t able to leave until after 7. While I gathered up my things I debated about calling Reid, thinking he was already gone. When I went to take Hotch some files about 20 minutes earlier Spencer was rushing out of the bullpen with his bag clutched in his hands.

Even though I wasn’t expecting to see him, I couldn’t stop myself from looking in the glass doors when I passed by out of habit.

He was sitting at his desk. His head was tilted back, and it looked like his eyes were closed. Even in a position that most people would appear relaxed in, he still seemed incredibly tense.  

I can just pop in and tell him hi, I reasoned. Let him know I’m not expecting anything, but I’m here for him.

I had given a lot of thought to my relationship with Spencer over the days he was gone. He was still healing from what happened with Tobias, it wasn’t fair of me to put unreasonable expectations on him right now. I was his friend before anything else. I could put my personal feelings aside if I needed to.

Squaring my shoulders, I pushed the doors open and headed towards his desk. The only person still at their desk was the newest member of the team, SSA Prentiss.

“Hey, y/n,” she greeted.

I had intended to return her greeting, but Spencer’s eyes snapped open and zeroed in on me. The look in his eyes made my blood freeze in my veins. He looked at me like he’d never seen me before, like my presence in this space was annoying to him.

Reid stood abruptly, pulling the strap of his messenger back up on his shoulder before he brushed past me. I had barely processed his actions before he was already leaving the bullpen.

“Spence!” I called. “Hang on!”

He just kept walking. I all but sprinted in my attempt to catch up to him. “Spencer, what the fuck,” I whispered. I knew he had seen me. Once I was closer to him, I reached out and gripped his elbow in an attempt to get his attention.

His entire body jerked as he spun around to face me. “Don’t fucking touch me,” he hissed, venom dripping from his words.

My body recoiled from him like he’d slapped me. “I’m sorry,” I mumbled. “I thought…I just…”

Just then a pair of agents walked past us and they did not bother hiding the curiosity in their eyes.

Spencer’s hand shot out and gripped my forearm, pulling me along behind him. The hold he had on my arm was almost painful, but I couldn’t focus on anything. My brain was still playing his words over and over again.

“Don’t fucking touch me.”

He didn’t stop until we reached the copy room; he jerked the door open and shoved me inside.

“Spencer!” I yanked my arm out of his grip, rubbing the skin with my other hand. “What the fuck is going on?!”

“You thought what?” he snarled taking a step closer to me. “You thought that because I fucked you that means you’re my girlfriend now or something?”

My eyes widened at his words. Something cold and heavy settled in the pit of my stomach while some unnamable feeling made me throat constrict. “N-no, I didn’t think that. I just-“

I had heard Spencer’s laugh so many times before, it used to make me smile every time I heard it. People who hadn’t heard him laugh before might have thought the sound that he made when he heard my words was a laugh. But it wasn’t. It was harsh and brittle. His face was pulled into a smile that was condescending.

“Are you sure, y/l/n? Because you’ve sure been fucking acting like it all day. I feel your pathetic little looks everywhere I turn. Like I kicked your dog or something.”

I felt tears prick the corners of my eyes because…this wasn’t Spencer. This wasn’t my Spencer. My Spencer couldn’t use chopsticks and held my face when he kissed me.

“Oh, my fucking god,” he groaned in disgust. “Are you going to cry, y/n? Are you kidding me right now?”

People always say terrible things happen so fast, it’s what I read in witness statements all the time. This was a terrible thing, but time seemed to slow down for it. I saw everything in perfect detail, I heard every single syllable that came out of this mouth.

When the first tear slid down my cheek that dark, brittle laugh left his mouth again. “If you weren’t being so pathetic, I might feel bad for you.”

“Why are you doing this?” I whispered, wiping at my cheeks.

“Why am I doing what, y/n?” His voice was so much louder than it was before. It didn’t make sense that he brought me to a more private place to avoid attention but now he was…yelling at me. “We fucked, do you get that? That is all! I don’t know what sad little schoolgirl fantasy you built up in your mind, but that night wasn’t special to me.”

Oh. I swallowed down my emotion, my eyes moving away from him to stare down at the floor. I wished I was the sort of person that could lash out whenever I was hurt, to hurt that person back as badly as they hurt me; but it’s just not who I was.

Like a shark that smelled blood in the water, Spencer moved closer to me. His fingers brushed over the strands of hair that hung near my shoulder. “I hate to be the one to break it to you, y/n. You’re not special. You were just a desperate girl that wanted attention. You were a pussy to use.”

I jerked back violently at his words, putting as much distance as I could between us. My entire body felt so cold, my face frozen in a mask of confusion.

Reid scoffed once more before he turned and left the room.

He never looked back at me.

I’m not sure how long I stayed in the copy room after he’d left. It may have been seconds; it could have been hours. I think I was in some sort of shock; my body just autopiloted to a place I felt safe.

I don’t remember unlocking my office door. I don’t remember collapsing in my chair and burying my head in my hands while sobs tore out of my chest.

All I remember is hearing my name a moment before I felt someone standing beside me.

“Hey,” a familiar voice called softly. “What’s wrong, y/n?”

I lifted my head and looked into the worried face of one of my best friends.

Anderson didn’t say anything further, he just pulled me up from my chair and wrapped his arms around me while I cried.

--

Pain is a universal experience, but everyone feels it differently. Everyone heals differently.

My grandmother used to say, “Everything will be different in the morning.” I was never sure if that was true or not, but today I chose to believe it was. The pain and humiliation that burned in my gut when I remembered Spencer’s words yesterday wouldn’t last forever.

I had made a mistake. I had let someone use my body only to find out that person wasn’t who I thought they were. I wasn’t the first person to make that mistake, and I’m sure I wouldn’t be the last.

Anderson had stayed with me in my office last night while I pulled myself together enough to go home. He didn’t ask what had happened, but he wasn’t stupid, I’m sure he suspected what had broken my heart.

In a perfect world, I would have fallen for someone like Grant Anderson. He was kind, funny, and a constant source of comfort when I felt my world breaking apart.

I had always tried to think of each painful moment as a lesson in some way, and lessons can teach you both good and bad things. Even my worst moments of pain, I couldn’t regret the choices that lead me to them. Every single experience shapes us into who we grow to be.

One day, when this pain in my heart wasn't so sharp, I think I might be able to look back on my night with Spencer Reid without feeling regret. He had been my friend, he was hurting. How I tried to help his suffering was a mark of who I was.

How he caused me pain was a mark of who he was.

Grant had sent me a text around 6 am, asking me if I was going to take some personal time. The BAU wasn't assigned to an active case today, but I had sent some files over to JJ that looked promising. My money was they'd be headed out to New Orleans tomorrow to catch a serial killer once she had reviewed those files.

A very large part of myself wanted to stay home; I wanted to hide from my pain and tend to my wounded heart in private. But no matter how big that part of me was, I couldn’t bring myself to do it. I couldn’t let this pain consume me.

I wouldn’t let it.

With that thought in mind, I squared my shoulders and walked into the headquarters of the FBI.

--

The hardest moments after a tragedy are the moments after; after the first wave of pain has passed and you’re expected to go back to your normal life. The world never slowed down just because you were in agony.

JJ came by and told me she thought New Orleans looked promising and asked if I could contact the lead detective for any updates then forward those to her.

She wasn’t a profiler but even she knew something was wrong. Right before she walked out of my office she said, “Hey, are you okay?”

It's always so much worse when they ask you if you're okay because they never want an honest answer. So, on top of all the agony, you feel you have to pull off a convincing lie.

“Just tired, JJ.”

I don’t think she quite believed me, but she was kind enough not to push me any further.

A few hours later JJ was on the phone the detective heading up the investigation into the murders happening in the French Quarter. It looked like the team was heading out to New Orleans sometime tomorrow morning.

My job mostly had me working with JJ, but SSA Hotchner was the unit chief. It wasn’t uncommon that I had to get his signature of approval on something JJ needed. So, when it was time to stop by Hotch’s office, I made my way there with no outward reluctance.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Spencer standing around the cluster of desks that housed his teammates. They all called out in greeting after I dropped the files off, but I had only waved over my shoulder and rushed out of the room.

Anderson had been popping in and out of my office all morning. First, he had made excuses for coming by, but much to my amusement he had dropped the façade after he came to ask me if he could borrow a pen…while he was holding a pen.

The biggest dilemma of my day was over coffee. Of course, I hadn’t gotten any sleep last night and I was dragging. Caffeine was obviously the answer.

But if you knew Spencer Reid, you know he was always at the coffee machine in the BAU bullpen.

I could just go downstairs to counterterrorism, I thought idly. But if I’m already in the elevator I could just run down the block and get coffee. JJ wouldn’t mind.

I was still debating my options when I heard a tentative knock on my door.

I am not proud of my actions, I’m truly not. But there is only one person in this whole building who would knock on a door that hesitantly.

The blinds in my office were closed…but I had left the door unlocked.

On instinct, I slid out of my chair, knees hitting the floor, and hid under my desk.

What the fuck are you doing, y/n? I mentally scolded myself. This is a new low, even for you.

It turned out to be pointless anyway.

He didn’t open the door.

--

“You don’t have to tell me,” Anderson began. “But…”

“I have to tell you?” I supplied after a beat.

He flopped down in the chair on the other side of my desk. “Exactly.”

The small smile that curled up on my face was the first real smile I’d had in almost 24 hours.

How had it only been 24 hours?

“Listen,” he said, bringing my attention back to him. “I know it’s about Reid. I’m not a profiler, but it’s all that makes sense.”

“How’s that?”

One of his dark brown eyebrows raised at the question. “I mean, even if we ignored everything else, the fact that he keeps walking past your office door is a dead giveaway.”

I rubbed my temples with my fingers. “Grant, I can’t right now.”

“Can’t or won’t?”

“Can’t,” I whispered out. “I don’t…I need to hold it together. Just for a while longer.”

Grant reclined his back against the chair, his eyes surveying me. “Fine. But I don’t like seeing you like this.”

I don’t like feeling like this.

“Alright,” he sighed, rising to his feet. “I have to go run some sort of errand for Garcia.”

I didn’t bother asking, he’d say it was “classified.”

All the air seemed to leave the room when he opened the door.

Spencer was standing on the other side, his hand up like he had been about to knock.

Grant’s entire body jerked while Spencer’s eyes widened. “What are you doing here?” my friend demanded.

The most startling thing was how surprised Spencer looked at Grant’s tone; like it was some oddity that one of my closest friends would have been angry on my behalf.

“C-can I talk to you?” he asked, his voice squeaking on the last word.

I licked my lips, weighing my options. How could he hurt me any worse? I gave Grant a nod, signaling that I was okay. He moved out of the way, granting Spencer entry, but I knew my friend; he wouldn’t be far.

The man in front of me waited until the door was shut before he spoke. “Did I do something?”

My eyes had dropped down to my hands only to shoot up to his face at those words. What?

“To make you upset?” he clarified. “I…you’ve been avoiding me all day. And I know you were in here earlier when I knocked.”

His words tore at the bandages I had wrapped my heart in, ripping my wound open again. All I could do was wrap my arms around my middle in an attempt to physically hold myself together. “W-why would I want to talk to you?”

If possible, he looked even more confused than I felt. “What is going on?” He took a step towards me. “Baby-“

My reaction to hearing that word come out of his mouth was visceral. I shot to my feet, almost stumbling over my chair in an attempt to put more distance between us.

Spencer froze. “I…I don’t understand,” he pleaded. “Please, y/n, you have to talk to me. It…it hurts me to see you hurt.”

Any work I had done to repair my heart was destroyed at his words. I never should have let him inside. The look on his face twisted a knife in my stomach. He had the audacity to look distraught over my tears like he wasn’t the cause of them.

“I know I said I’d call but I was just so busy with the case…I thought…you’d understand.”

I ran my tongue over my teeth while my eyes blinked rapidly in an attempt to clear the tears that were clouding my vision. If I couldn’t remember everything about yesterday so clearly, I would doubt that the man standing before me now was the same monster that spewed venom at me yesterday.

“I don’t know what you want me to say, Reid.”

He flinched at my use of his last name. “I want you to tell me what happened.”

“Why?” I rasped out. “Do you want it to hurt more? Why are you doing this to me?”

Spencer took another step towards me, his hands were outstretched. "I don't-"

"Don't fucking touch me." I tried to fill my words with the same venom his words had yesterday when he told me the same thing, but my words came out as a broken plea.

He blinked and dropped his hands to his sides. “I deserve to know why you’re treating me like this.”

A sad sort of laugh came out of my mouth at his words.

Somehow the non-acknowledgment of my pain hurt worse than anything. “Do I mean so little to you that you forgot our conversation yesterday?”

Spencer shook his head, his hair flopping around his ears. “No, I didn’t talk to you yesterday.”

What? “Yes, you did.” My voice shook but my words still tumbled out of my mouth. “You pulled me into the copy room and told me…you told me that our night together was nothing…you told me that I was nothing.”

His brows knit together, his mouth popping open. “What are you talking about? You’re…you’re everything, y/n.”

“Reid, please…I know I’m pathetic, but I can’t take this. I can’t…” My shoulders started to shake. “Please don’t make me feel this again.”

“Pathetic?” he questioned. “What are you talking about? Is this…is this some sort of game? You don’t want to be with me…so you do this? Did Anderson tell you about my mom?”

“What?”

“My mom has schizophrenia. Is that why you’re trying to make me feel crazy?”

My brows knitted together. “I…Nobody told me about your mom. I’m not trying to make you feel crazy. And I wanted to be with you. But you told me you didn’t want to be with me.”

He still denied my words. “No, I haven’t talked to you. You’ve been avoiding me.”

“You avoided me all day yesterday. When I finally came to talk to you in the bullpen you walked past me like I wasn't there. Then I went after you." I held up my arm, pushing my sleeve up to show him the finger-shaped bruises. "You dragged me into the copy room. You told me I was pathetic. You mocked me. You told me I was just some girl…some pussy for you to use."

He kept flinching at my words like they were whips leaving lashes all over his body.

“You told me I was nothing. You told me our night together was nothing.”

“No.” He continued to shake his head. “I…I wouldn’t say that. But I especially wouldn’t say that to you. You’re wrong.”

I just shrugged. “Ask Prentiss. She saw me follow you out of the bullpen yesterday. Ask Garcia to pull the security footage. There’s probably a recording of you breaking my heart.”

“No, no, no,” he muttered over and over again.

“I don’t know why you’re pretending you don’t remember, Spencer.”

He didn’t say anything else; he just turned and left my office, slamming the door behind him.

--

JJ was suspicious when I called her from my office phone instead of just walking over to see her, but she didn’t ask any questions about the mysterious illness I told her had hit me. She just told me that she hoped I felt better and to take all the time I needed.

I knew that the team was set to fly out after JJ presented the case at 10 am in the morning, meaning that going back to work tomorrow wouldn’t be too hard. No matter how badly I hurt now, I couldn’t lay down and cry about it.

Part of me was afraid if I laid down, I wouldn’t be able to get back up.

With that in mind, I would give myself today to feel the full force of my heartbreak. I would cry when I wanted to, I’d watch sad movies and make myself cry more, I’d eat junk food that ultimately only made me feel worse. I would feel this pain for one day.

I told myself Spencer Reid didn’t deserve more of my tears than that. I told myself that over and over again until I almost believed it.

Anderson had been texting me all day to check-in, I had even gotten a nice call from Penelope Garcia asking me if I needed anything.

The most unexpected call came at 8 pm that night from a number I didn’t recognize.

“Y/n?” the voice asked. “This is Prentiss.”

Oh. “Oh. Hi, Emily.”

“Listen, I called for two reasons. The first is that I wanted to check in on you, and the second is…the second is a bit more personal.”

Oh. I cleared my throat. “I’m as good as I can be, Emily.”

She sighed. "I figured. Which brings me to my second question. Did something happen between you and Reid?" After a few moments of my silence, Prentiss hurried on. "You don't have to tell me. It's just that…Reid came up to me this afternoon and demanded to know if I had seen you come into the bullpen to talk to him yesterday."

“What did you say?”

“Um, I told him yes. Because I did. What is going on?”

My fingers picked at the edges of the blanket in my lap. “I don’t know. Anderson thinks something is up with him.”

“We all think something is up with him.”

Her confirmation didn’t make me feel any better.

--

I arrived to work the following morning at 9 am, a full thirty minutes later than usual. JJ had stopped by my office to see how I was doing, followed by a visit from Prentiss. Garcia had teetered into the room about 15 minutes after Emily left, giving me a frosted cookie that was bigger than my hand.

“Cookies help,” she had said confidently.  

I hoped she was right.

Anderson popped in last. "Hey, ooh." He skidded to a stop. "You look terrible."

I shot him a withering look. “Thank you so much, Grant.”

“You know what I mean.”

“…That I look terrible?”

He nodded, his lips twitching at the corners. “Anyway, Hotch needs the mileage forms for the SUVs. I can run it over to him.”

My teasing tone vanished. “I’ve got it, Grant.”

I wasn’t sure if that was true, but I had to believe it was. Or at the very least it would be soon.

It took every ounce of will power I had not to let my eyes wander over to his desk when I entered the bullpen. I could almost feel him looking at me. It went against every natural instinct I had to ignore him…but what else could I do?

Hotch wasn’t in his office when I knocked but the door was unlocked. He never minded if we walked in when he was out if we just had something to drop off. I tried to find an open space on his desk to set the forms when I heard the door squeak on its hinges behind me.

I spun around, my startled eyes connecting with a pair of sharp brown eyes.

“Oh!” I exclaimed. “I’m sorry, Agent Gideon. I didn’t see you there.”

He gave me a small smile, but that sharp look didn’t leave his eyes. “No, I don’t suppose you would have,” he said simply. “It’s hard to notice anyone else when you’re trying so hard to not notice someone.”

“I don’t know what you mean.”

Gideon just nodded. “I’m going to tell you something. Now, you can take these words to heart, and I hope you do, or you can take them as the ramblings of…a sentimental old man.”

I shifted my weight from foot to foot. “Okay.”

"A lot of people think that the most important thing you can have in a relationship is love," he began, his eyes never wavering from mine. "In my not so humble opinion, they are incorrect. You see, y/l/n, love fades. Love isn't a thing that can stay in one form forever. It's always changing… its fluid."

“Sir, I don’t-“

“You know what the most important thing is?” he asked as if I hadn’t spoken. “Mercy.”

I just blinked at him. “I…I don’t think I understand.”

He just smiled at me, his hands moving into the pockets of his jeans. “Maybe not yet, but I think you will.” Gideon’s gaze broke from mine, looking through the windows of Hotch’s office to settle on Reid. His head was bent over his desk while his fingers ran over the pages in front of him. “He’ll need mercy, y/n. More than anything else.”

Agent Gideon turned back to look at me. “He’ll need it from all of us, but I don’t think he’ll need it from anyone more than you.”

I couldn’t think of anything to say in response. I truly didn’t understand what he was talking about.

With one final smile, he turned and left the office, leaving me with my thoughts.

--

Agent Gideon’s words were still swirling through my mind the following afternoon when I got another odd call from Agent Prentiss.

“Hey, y/l/n,” she began, her tone annoyed. “Listen, have you heard from Reid?”

My entire body stilled. “No, I haven’t. Why?”

“He was supposed to meet us at the plane. Morgan and I are waiting for him but he isn’t answering his cell.”

I hated the worry that wormed its way through my heart at her words. “I’m sorry, Em. I haven’t talked to him.”

She clicked her tongue against her teeth. “It was a long shot. Thanks, y/n.”

For several minutes after she hung up, I just stared at my phone. Don’t, I told myself firmly. He’s not your problem.

Spencer Reid wasn't my problem…but I couldn't just stop caring about him overnight. That's not the sort of person I was.

I kept telling myself I was calling to check on him for me, because I was the sort of person who checked on their friends.

It didn’t make it easier when he didn’t answer my calls either.

--

The need to silence the shrill ringing of my phone pulled me from my sleep the following night. I still hadn't heard from Spencer, but Prentiss had called me this morning to tell me Reid had gone to see one of his friends and "didn't have a signal." Her tone indicated she thought he was full of shit.

My eyes cracked open to look at the caller ID. When I read the name of the person calling me, my fingers frantically pushed “accept.”

“Spencer?” I asked, my voice still thick with sleep. “What’s wrong?”

“Everything.”

I sat up in my bed, my eyes looking at the clock on my nightstand. “It’s after 3 am. Did something happen with the case?”

He cleared his throat. “Um, yeah. The unsub is a woman. We tried to catch her tonight…but we can try again tomorrow.”

“You’ll get her.”

The only sound I heard was his uneven breathing. “That’s not why I called.”

My tongue ran over my lips while I pulled the blankets further up my chest like they would be able to protect me in some way. "Why did you call?"

“Do you think people deserve forgiveness?”

“I…I think it depends.”

“On what?” he asked desperately.

“On what they did…on if they’re sorry.” I cleared my throat. “Did you do something, Spencer?”

“I made a mistake.”

Somehow, I knew he wasn’t just talking about what had happened between us. He sounded just like I remembered him sounding when I wrapped my arms around him that night he came to my house.

His voice broke when he spoke again. “I’m so lost, y/n,” he sobbed. “I’m so lost and I don’t…I don’t know what to do.”

I fought to control my own emotions when he spoke. No matter what happened my heart still ached at the pain in his voice. “You might be lost, Spencer. But you’re not alone. Your team…your family found you. They brought you home. They’re still here for you. They’ll bring you home again.”

We sat in silence for a few moments, both of us lost in our own dark sea of pain.

“I don’t deserve to ask you to forgive me,” he said at last. “So, I won’t ask. I don’t even…I don’t even remember what I said.”

I think my subconscious mind had been connecting these pieces together for a while because in the darkness of my bedroom at almost 4 am, things finally began to take shape. The darkness that hung over Spencer was finally starting to take form.

“Just focus on the case, Spencer. We can talk when you get home.”

“Wait,” he called out. “Don’t go. Not yet.”

I don’t think I ever will.

--

The clock on my wall said it was just after 7 pm the following night when there was a knock on my door. Frowning, I made my way across the room, pressing my eye to the peephole, slightly surprised at who I saw.

I had figured he would come for me at some point, but I hadn’t expected it to be the very moment he got back into town.

…but it isn’t the very moment, I reminded myself. JJ had texted saying their plane was landing at 5 pm this afternoon.

He didn’t knock again but he didn’t move away from the door either. I think he knew I was there, just out of his reach, debating my options.

Opening yourself up to something that might hurt you is one of the most foolish and brave things a person can do. When someone you cared about broke your trust, how could you put your heart back into those very same hands?

I remembered Gideon’s words from that afternoon before they had left for New Orleans.

Over the past several days I had realized that that day in the copy room it wasn’t actually my Spencer that said those things. Something dark and painful had clawed its way into him and was trying to hollow him out.

That dark thing didn’t deserve my mercy…but I think Spencer did.

With a deep breath, I started to unlock my front door, grateful he couldn’t see that my hands were shaking. He looked tired but a different sort of tired than I was used to seeing. Weariness had crawled underneath his skin and was draining him slowly, but he didn’t look as defeated as he did the last time I saw him.

No matter how many times I had thought about this moment, I still wasn’t sure what to say

“I came…I came to explain.” He said at last.

I was still frozen in place watching him shift uncomfortably. I knew he wanted me to invite him in…but, how could I? Trusting him enough to talk to him was one thing but how could I allow him into the only place I felt safe?

Gideon’s words played through my mind again. Mercy.

Taking a step back from the door, I waved him inside. I moved to sit on the couch, but Spencer just stood in front of me.

"When Tobias abducted me…" he trailed off, balling his hands into fists. "He had dissociative identity disorder. It's much more rare than people think. Whenever it's been observed under clinical settings, the most that has been observed is 2. Tobias had three.

The first was him, the next was his father, and the last was the Archangel, Raphael. Tobias’s father abused him horribly… Charles broke something inside of him, he fractured him. The only way he could survive was to start abusing drugs. He took them intravenously.”

Gideon's words had started to weave the pieces together, but it was actually Spencer's words from our night together that cemented everything in place. “I don’t want you to see what he did to me.”

"He thought he was being kind when he injected me." Spencer crossed his arms over his chest, tapping his tongue against his upper lip. "You hear about addiction; I could tell you the statistics on people who suffer from opioid addiction. But I never in a million years thought it would be me.”

I didn’t realize I was crying until a tear fell from my face and hit the back of my hand.

“I’m not the person who gets addicted to things. I’m not the stereotypical picture of an addict…but that’s what I am, y/n. I’m an addict.” He reached into his front pocket, pulling out a small coin. “This is a newcomer’s chip…from narcotics anonymous. You get it at your very first meeting. I got this an hour ago.”

“Spencer,” I rasped out. “I’m so sorry.”

He came to sit beside me on the couch then, his hand covering one of mine. "I thought I could handle it. I convinced myself it wasn't that bad, but it was. What I did to you was reprehensible, y/n. And I am so sorry." Spencer's voice broke, his shoulders shaking with repressed emotion. "I will be sorry about that day for the rest of my life. I don't deserve any sort of second chance."

I turned completely towards him, throwing my arms around him. “Yes, you do, Spencer,” I whispered into his hair. “You do.”

This night felt so much different than the first night I held him like this while he cried. I didn't know the cause of his pain that night, but it broke my heart nevertheless; now that I knew the pain inside this beautiful man…I think the pain I had been feeling was tearing at my soul.

Addiction doesn’t discriminate. It’s a disease that will sink its hooks into anyone and refuse to let go. Spencer had made a mistake; his actions had gutted me. But…was it really him? Or was it the monster that has hold of him? It was in these thoughts that I finally began to understand the weight of Agent Gideon's words. "He’ll need mercy from everyone…but from no one more than you.”

I wasn’t in love with Spencer…at least not yet, but I did love him. In those moments when loving someone felt impossible mercy was the most important thing you could offer. I had to show him my mercy while he moved through this…because I knew love would come later.

“I’m here for you, Spencer. I want to help you in any way I can.”

He pulled back, his wide brown eyes meeting mine. “I can’t ask you to battle my addiction for me, y/n. I wouldn’t even if I could.” His voice was earnest when he spoke, his hands coming up to cup my face with a touch that seemed so familiar. “I promise that I’m going to try. I’m going to mess up at some point, some moments will be harder than others. I can’t…I can’t be perfect at this. But I promise I will never stop trying.”

“You don’t have to be perfect, Spencer. You’re not worthy because you’re perfect. You’re worthy because you’re…you.”

His eyes were soft when they ran over my face, his hands coming up to cup my jaw again. “I can leave, if you want…I know you’ll need time…I can’t expect-“

I leaned forward to brush my lips against his. “Don’t go,” I whispered. “Just be with me. Be here with me, Spence.”

I'm not sure who moved first. It was like all the pain in my body gave way to such a burning need that it almost consumed me. Our lips barely broke apart when I pulled him from the couch, guiding him to my bedroom; our actions were so similar to what they had been on that first night that felt like a lifetime ago.

But everything was different.

My bedroom was lit only by the dusky orange glow from the setting sun. I didn’t get to question Spencer about anything. His hands moved urgently against my body, ridding me of my shirt and bra. I unbuttoned his shirt, careful not to push it off of his shoulders. My nails scored his chest while his mouth moved down to kiss the column of my throat.

Spencer’s knee was wedged between my thighs when his mouth closed over my nipple. My hands tried to move down to undo his pants but when his teeth tugged at the tip of my breast all I could do was whimper.

“Spencer. Please.”

His eyes opened and lifted to meet mine. He looked nervous for a moment before he started to kiss down my body. I lifted my hips to help him remove my pants. When his fingers hooked into the waistband of my panties, I realized he had never seen me in the light before.

I felt his index finger trace down my slit, spreading me open under his gaze. He swallowed thickly when one of his fingers entered me, pulling a moan from my throat.

“Can I?”

“Yes. Yes.” I wasn’t sure what he was asking, but I would have given him anything in that moment.

I wasn’t ready when I felt his tongue tentatively lick my pussy. My hips bucked off the bed causing him to chuckle.

“Hold still,” he whispered as he spread me wider. He inserted another finger into my heat while his tongue fluttered around my clit.

“I’m trying,” I whined. “Fuck. I thought you said you hadn’t done this before.”

Spencer lifted his head to press a kiss to my inner thigh. “I haven’t,” he replied, his voice needlessly smug. Before I could comment his lips closed around my clit again.

My fingers were tangled in his soft brown hair while my hips rocked against his mouth. “Spencer, I’m close. I want-fuck! I want to cum when you’re inside me.”

He rose up on his knees, his hands moving to his belt. He had looked reluctant to leave his current position, but I needed him now. "You can eat my pussy to your heart's content later."

Spencer’s hand froze, his eyes snapping up to meet mine.

“What?”

He shook his head. “Nothing. You just…you said later.” The confusion must have been plain on my face because he clarified, “I can have you later too.”

My arousal was still pulsing in my body but now something else was too. I knew he didn’t mean sex when he said he could have me; Spencer meant he could have me, he could be with me.

With that thought, I urged him up my body so I could press my lips to his again. We were still kissing when I felt the blunt tip of his cock brush against me before he slowly pushed inside of me.

“You…I didn’t know something could feel like this,” he said when his hips settled against mine,

I didn’t either.

I think he must have felt the same frantic need I did. His thrusts were forceful as he drove into me. I was already so close that I could feel myself approaching my peak.

“Spence,” I whimpered out.

“I know, I feel you. You’re right there.” He reached between our bodies and rubbed his thumb across my clit.

My back arched as my orgasm washed over me, my mouth hung open in a silent scream. After a few more thrusts, I felt Spencer find his release too. He whispered my name against my hair while he slowly came down, pressing soft kisses all over any part of my skin he could reach.

--

The frantic mood from before had lifted, but something still felt urgent. Spencer had gotten up a few moments ago to dispose of the condom in the bathroom, leaving me alone with my thoughts.

He hadn’t removed his clothes again, and something about the energy in the room made me put my clothes back on too.

I was sitting at the end of my bed when he came out of the bathroom a few moments later. He looked resigned and…almost defeated.

“Spence,” I started but he just shook his head.

He came to stand in front of me before he spoke. “I have to…I can’t hide from you.”

I stood up before he could move. “You’re not hiding anything, Spencer. Not anymore.”

He pressed his lips against mine again. I think he understood the gravity of my words and what revealing his body meant. He knew I’d see him; I’d see all of him. But whenever I looked into his eyes when he started to open his shirt, I felt like I saw more of him than I ever had.

Everything he felt was floating through his amber-colored eyes. His hands shook and a few tears leaked out of his eyes when he pulled his shirt from his body.

The bend of his left elbow was covered in bruises in all different phases of healing. It looked like one of his veins might even have blown.

When I brought my eyes back up to his, I found them shut tight.

“Hey,” I whispered, wrapping my arms around his middle, careful of his arm. “Spencer, it’s okay.”

“No, it’s not,” he breathed out.

I only held him tighter. “It will be. One day it will be.” I let out a shaky breath of my own before I spoke again. “You know I’m going to fall in love with you one day, right?”

His body jerked at my words, a tiny sob leaving his mouth.

“It’s true, Spencer. You have to know that. You’re worthy of love. You’re worthy of my love.”

He pulled back from me, his hands cradling my face while his eyes searched mine. “I’m not. I’m not worthy…but I’m going to try to be.”

The slashes and cracks in my heart didn’t feel so painful when I kissed him again. It wasn’t my job to fix him. It wasn’t his job to fix me.

But I could show him mercy while he fought his battle. He deserved that.

Everyone deserves that.

--

Taglist: @rachelxwayne @pinkdiamond1016 @sickeninglyshoujo @justagirllookingforherplace @nanocoool @andiebeaword @imjusthereformggcontent @rainsong01 @violentvulgarvolatile @mys2425 @al3xmnd @imfalling-inlove @cielo1984 @shadyladyperfection @kissingvalentino @goofygubler14​ @hopebaker​

[s1utforronweasley]

1 STEP FORWARD, 3 STEPS BACK // D.M

[female reader, based on the Olivia Rodrigo song 1 step forward, 3 steps back]

Called you on the phone today

Just to ask you how you were

All I did was speak normally

Somehow I still struck a nerve

It was a cold winter morning and the weather made the tip of your nose turn red and made your fingers feel like ice. You tightened your scarf and rubbed your hands together, trying to create warmth, as you walked across the courtyard.

Finally approaching the great hall, your eyes scanned across the bustling room, until your eyes finally fell on a very familiar mop of platinum blonde locks.

You made your way over to your boyfriend and sat in the free space in between him and Theodore Nott. You placed a gentle kiss on his cheek as you sat on the bench. "How are you this morning, Draco?" You asked in your usual soft tone

Unfortunately, all you got in return was a look up and down, a deep sigh and watching wipe the spot on his flawless face you had just kissed. You pinned it on his bad moods that seemed to be a lot more frequent than usual.

You blinked back the tears brimming in your eyes and turned to talk tho Theodore instead. He was always perfectly kind to you.

You got me fucked up in the head, boy

Never doubted myself so much

Like, am I pretty? Am I fun, boy?

I hate that I give you power over that kind of stuff

When you fist joined Hogwarts, you always had a smile on your face and a spring in your step. You were the type of person people naturally gravitated towards, always very forgiving. You couldn't care less what anyone else though.

And even though you may not have noticed at first, the person you once were slowly changed once you began dating Draco Malfoy.

You found yourself staring in the mirror for a few minutes longer than usual, comparing yourself to other people, even your own best friends. You were slowly changing your ways all so that you could please your boyfriend as much as possible.

Although you would never admit it, you hate that he has power over that kind of stuff.

'Cause it's always one step forward and three steps back

I'm the love of your life until I make you mad

It's always one step forward and three steps back

Do you love me, want me, hate me? Boy, I don't understand

No, I don't understand

Sometimes, when Draco was in a good mood, you would go for picnic dates by the black lake, where you would lay together in the sun. Talk, laugh eat and sometimes lay in a comfortable silence.

However, the next day you would come crashing back down from cloud nine when you would walk into the great hall and be ignored or find him with his arm around another girl, the same angelic laugh suffocating your senses as yesterday. Only this time he wasn't laughing with you. You didn't even know he was laughing at you.

You were always walking on eggshells around Draco, always double checking what you were about to say in your head before speaking aloud.

Sometimes you would be hanging out with his friends, sitting as close as possible to eachother, laughing and joking. This bliss would last until you would say something wrong. He would kick you out your own common room, telling you to "go to bed." because you've "ruined the fun again.". Sympathetic smiles offered from his friends.

You never understood him, and you soon came to terms with the fact that you probably never would.

And maybe in some masochistic way

I kinda find it all exciting

Like, which lover will I get today?

Will you walk me to the door or send me home cryin'?

Before Draco, your previous relationships had been predictable. You had always craved something more, someone who would keep you on your toes. That's exactly what Draco Malfoy was.

Whenever you went out with him, you never knew exactly which Draco Malfoy persona you would be meeting today. Would he cherish every moment with you and let you fall asleep in his arms or treat you like dirt under his shoe and send you home crying.

No, it's back and forth, did I say something wrong?

It's back and forth, goin' over everything I said

It's back and forth, did I do something wrong?

It's back and forth, maybe this is all your fault

Months into your relationship with Draco, your best friend also got a boyfriend. You saw the way she was treated. Hello and goodbye kisses, sweet nicknames, holding hands and whispering "I love you" whenever possible. Soon enough, you saw the true colours of your relationship.

This were the events that lead you to the point where our knuckles met the hard material of Draco's door for the last time.

He swung open the door, wearing only a pair of black joggers, his hair was wet and messy and his featured were as defined as ever. His attractiveness only making your job harder.

"Come in."He said in a monotone voice.

"No, it's okay. This won't take long."

"Alright, have it your way then." He muttered.

"We're over." You watched as the colour drained from his face and the cocky look on his face changed to a more vulnerable one.

"No. Wh-what do you mean. Y/N/N, you know I lov-"

"NO." you shouted. You drew in a breath, calming yourself down. "no Draco. You don't get to say that now. Not when I've loved you with everything in me only to get nothing back. So please, don't tell me you love me, because nothing can take back what you've done to me."

You shoved the box you were carrying in your arms into his chest, causing him to stumble back a bit.

"I hope one day you find someone who waits around long enough for you to get your shit together, because merlin knows I couldn't. Have a nice life Draco."

You turned around. took a deep breath and began to walk back down the hall, before his voice stopped you once again.

"Y/N." He spoke. "I um, I really am sorry. For everything. I hope you find someone who treats you properly, because merlin knows I couldn't." He repeated in a whisper.

You mustered up a small smile.

——————

That was 15 years ago. Now, you were sitting with your little girl on your knee, both dressed in dark green gowns, with your beautiful. loving husband, Theodore Nott sat next to you.

You were watching Draco Malfoy marry Astoria Greengrass, a stunning woman who waited around long enough for Draco Malfoy to learn to love properly.

It was 9 o'clock when you and Theo decided to leave. You walked up, hands linked together as per usual, while your daughter slept peacefully in his arms. You walked up to the newly wed couple and Theo immediately fell into a hushed conversation with Astoria, leaving you and Draco to chat.

"Y/N"

"Draco."

"It's great to see you again."

"It's great to see you again." You both spoke at the same time, causing you both to laugh, quickly followed by shushing noises from Theo and Tori.

"You deserve this Draco. I'm proud of you."

"Thank you Y/N/N, I wanted to thank you, for making me see my mistakes. Without you I don't think I'd be here right now, married. So thank you, really."

"None of this was me, Draco. It was all you."

You held eye contact for a few seconds before you both pulled eachother into a tight hug, staying there for a minute or so.

"Love you, Y/N/N."

"Love you too, Draco."

"Stay in touch?" He asked.

"Of course." You replied.

You pulled Astoria into a hug, congratulating her on her marriage, telling her to keep in touch, before Taking Theo's hand in your own. He gave you a quick kiss before leaving the wedding, with a guarantee you would be falling asleep in his arms.

[aimless-imagines-for-fun]

His

Paring :: mafia dark!Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader

Warnings :: 18+, Smut/NSFW, Dark Themes, Possessiveness, Oral(M Recieving), Deep Throating

Word Count :: 2,787

Summary :: Bucky’s had a long day and you’re the only one he can release his stress on

A/N ::....there may or may not be another part... idk yet.... I just really like Mafia Bucky

Some days were better than others, for both you and Bucky. 

So far, your day had gone swimmingly. You woke up, did an easy morning stretch to help you wake up, and proceeded to clean around your house in your favorite sundress. There wasn’t much to do, with the house usually clean due to Bucky hiring professional cleaners to come once a week. Still, the dishes weren’t going to do themselves. 

The highlight of your day was a package being delivered. A book that you had pre-ordered from one of your favorite authors. After you cooked your lunch, you spent the rest of your day reading the book, sitting on the dark grey couch in your large living room. That was all you could do besides watching tv or doing a small hobby to keep you occupied until Bucky came home.

Bucky’s day, on the other hand, was infuriatingly long. He was a businessman and a mob boss, meaning he’d usually have long days. If he was lucky, he’d just have to deal with some idiot trying to cheat him. Today was an unlucky day. He received a visit from Helmut Zemo, the head of a Sokovian Mafia trying to start up in Brooklyn. 

-

Bucky sat at his desk, leaning back in his leather chair as he stared at the man who just entered his office. 

“I already told you the deal Zemo. There’s no bargaining, if you don’t like it save your breath and get the hell out of here.”

The Sokovian ignored him, walking over to a large bookshelf that was against the wall. “You know, for the most powerful man in Brooklyn, you’d be surprised how quickly some of your ‘people’ are willing to betray you if you offer them enough cash.”

Bucky’s eyes narrowed, a scowl forming on his face. “What the hell are you talking about?”

Zemo glanced over for a moment. “The docks.”

A few nights prior, one of Bucky’s incoming shipments of illegal weapons had been robbed. A small number of men were killed, and the rest were injured. There was also a weird symbol that had been spray-painted around the docks, a sign that whoever had done this was publicly declaring war.

Bucky’s jaw clenched and he was now sitting up straight in his seat. “You did that?” “It was quite easy to.”

“So why the fuck are you here now? I could put a bullet through your head in a second.”

Zemo laughed, finally turning to face the other man. “You won’t because you know I’m not stupid enough to come here without just as many men you have.” He let out a small breath, taking a few steps forward. His gaze moved down to Bucky’s left hand, an eyebrow raising with curiosity. “You haven’t married her yet? She’s a lovely woman.”

In an instant Bucky stood up, his hands balled into fists. If a look could kill, Zemo would be dead and his body burning.

“I came to tell (Y/N) thank you. Not long ago, one of my guys got a bit lost and she helped him. Pietro said she was ‘the kindest girl he’d met’ and ‘extremely helpful and friendly.”

Bucky cursed in the back of his mind. It sounded exactly like something you’d do, you were kind and naive by nature, simply wanting to help people when they needed it. It was what drew him to you, and it seemed like it was attracting unwanted attention from others now.

“I’m gonna give you ten minutes to get the hell out of my territory.”

“Why so generous?”

“It’s a nice neighborhood,” Bucky replied sarcastically.

Zemo walked back towards the door, understanding he had pushed the man far enough. A coy smile crept on his face, looking at Bucky one last time. “I’d keep her better guarded and up to speed if I were you. She’s too innocent to be involved with you.”

Once Zemo and his men left Bucky nearly tore apart his office. It took Sam and Steve a good hour to calm the man down and make sure he didn’t do anything reckless. Once he cooled down, Sam revealed that Tony Stark had been the one to cross Bucky. Tony’s father was the previous big bad until Bucky came around.

-

“I don’t give a fuck what you do Steve, just make sure Tony doesn’t think he’s not get strung up on a tree after I shoot that Sokovian bastard in the head.” 

His voice was full of annoyance and his grip on the steering wheel of his car was so tight the whites of his knuckles were visible. It was one thing for Zemo to publicly humiliate his authority by robbing him, but he had indirectly threatened you by mentioning you to Bucky. You were his and his alone. He had invested far too much in securing you, ensuring that you’d never leave him. 

-

Bucky leaned on the doorframe of your apartment’s bedroom, arms crossed over his chest as he watched you step around the room. “What are you doing?”

“Going home,” You muttered, continuing to pack your suitcase.

“That’s on the other side of the country.”

“I know.”

“I can’t keep an eye on you if you’re in LA.”

You looked up from the clothes you were packing, glaring at him. “I know.”

Bucky let out a huff. “So you also know I can’t make sure you’re safe.”

You let out a dry laugh, eyes rolling. “I’ll probably be a lot safer once I’m far away from you.”

The man pushed himself off the door frame, now approaching you with long strides. “You’re not leaving (Y/N).”

You threw the shirt you hand in your hand down, turning to face him. “Yes, I am Bucky, because you lie to me!” Your voice was strained, eyes looking up at him full of pain.

“I didn’t lie to you-”

“Yes, you did! You lied to me about what you did and you hid the truth!”

When you and Bucky started dating, he told you he ran a large ‘supply and demand’ business in Brooklyn and that was it. Like the naive girl you were, who had just moved to the east coast, you believed him because you fell for him hard at first. He spoiled you and made you feel like a princess in public, and in private you helped him release all the pent-up stress he had built up from work. A few months later, you finally figured out why Bucky was always so protective of you and wanted to know where you were 24/7. 

Bucky could see the tears you were holding back, mentally cursing at himself for being the cause. He cupped your cheek with his normal hand. You had to resist the urge to lean into his hold.

“I know I hurt you, and I’m sorry, but…” His voice trailed off. In a swift motion, his metal hand wrapped around your waist lifting you up and over his shoulder. “You’re not leaving me (Y/N).”

“James Buchanan Barnes! Put me down this instant!” You slammed your fists into his back to no avail. “I hate you! I hate you! I hate you!”

“I love you too darling,” He mumbled, proceeding to walk you out of your apartment.

-

You were on the fourth chapter of your book when you heard a car door slam. You sprung up from your seat, moving as quickly as you could to greet Bucky at the front door. When you got there, you saw he had already let himself inside. His brows were knit together, looking down at the door’s locks.

“Why isn’t the door locked?” He questioned before he even saw you.

With the territorial instinct he had when it came to you and his meeting with Zemo earlier, it was clear he was not happy about such a small thing, no matter your excuse.

“Oh, I must’ve forgotten to lock it when I got the mail today,” You said quietly.

He had lectured you multiple times about how important it was you locked the door, even before you move in with him.

You wrapped your arms around his torso, properly greeting him with a smile like you did every day. You had done this so many times, you noticed how long it took for him to softly wrap a single arm around you before walking away. He was upset.

“Go to the bedroom and wait. Now,” He ordered.

Your heart started racing, wondering what was going to happen to you. If he had stress pent up, he would either wait until after dinner or start kissing you roughly the second he stepped in. He had only acted like this when you pushed him to his limit, like when you threatened to leave him or attempted to run away when he first forced you to live with him.

You sat at the edge of your shared bed, hands holding and fiddling with the hem of your dress. When Bucky was this angry, he was painfully rough to the point where you would begin crying. You quickly began thinking of everything you had done recently, wondering what could’ve pushed him to this point.

He walked in, jacket off and the sleeves to his white button-up rolled up to his elbows. Even though your mind was screaming with fear, your body started heating up with desire seeing him. Especially when your eyes glanced down to his pants and saw a hardness forming. ‘Fuck, he’s been thinking about this.’

Walking up to you, Bucky grabbed your chin with his thumb and index finger, forcing you to look up at him. As a sort of last-ditch effort to get some kindness from him, you gave him a doe-eyed look.

He leaned down, pressing a long kiss against your lips before pulling away. “Get on your knees.”

You took in a deep breath, accepting he wouldn’t be gentle. You pulled away from his cold metal hand, sinking down to stand before him on your knees. Keeping eye contact with him, you managed to under his brown leather belt and navy trousers. You looped your fingers at the hem of his pants, pulling them down along with his briefs just enough for his fully erect shaft to be freed. 

With both of your small hands wrapping around his shaft, you could feel yourself growing wet at the sound of his soft groan. At first, you started stroking his length slowly, leaning your face closer to lick the tip and swirl your tongue around the head.

Bucky didn’t allow you to continue this very long. Only a small dribble of precum was licked up before he grabbed a fist full of your hair from the back of your head and pushed himself further in. Another groan escaped him feeling the warmth of your mouth around his cock. He hit the back of your throat and you gagged, not yet ready for him to go deeper. He did it again two more times, warning you that he planned on having you take all of him in his mouth.

Your hands moved up to his thighs to hold yourself steady and you relaxed your throat the best you could in preparation. Once he started to push his dick further in, you could feel tears start to well up in your eyes as he went down your throat. You moaned each time he shoved his shaft down your throat, sending a soft vibration on his shaft.

Bucky eventually started thrusting his hips into your mouth, fully fucking your mouth as tears started to fall out of your eyes. Watching your glossy eyes stare up at him with his cock down your throat he nearly lost it, feeling his ballsack tighten. Not wanting to cum just yet, he pulled out, a string of your saliva falling off his dick and dribbling down your mouth. You gasped and began panting for air, wiping away your drool with the back of your hand.

He sat on the edge of the bed now, pulling your hips to stand in front of him once you stood up. “Off.”

You took off your dress, followed by your bra and wet panties. Already knowing what was going to happen, you moved to straddle his hips. You and Bucky had had sex numerous times before, but you always needed a moment to get used to his size. He wasn’t going to allow that.

With his large hands on your hips, he forced you down his entire dick, groaning at how tight your walls clenched around him.

“Bucky!” You cried out, body tingling as he filled you up, balls deep. 

He held your hips with such a strong grip you were sure there were going to be marks after. He bounced you up and down his cock, watching you with a dark gaze as you moaned and whimpered against him. Only he could make you feel like this, act like this for him.

He thrusted his hips up, and you moaned loudly, back arching as he hit a sweet sensitive spot. “Please!”

“Please, what?” Bucky asked, knowing full well what you wanted. He wanted you to beg.

“Fuck me right there Bucky! Please!”

More than happy to comply, he proceeded to slam into that same spot, your breath growing faster and cunt tighter each time it was hit. His breath was becoming heavy, and his movements ragged.

He watched as you looked down at him fucking you and saw you shudder. “Ah!” Your walls tightened and your release hit you, juices pouring out. Feeling you release triggered his own orgasm, releasing inside of you. You could feel spurt after spurt of hot cum filling you up and your tight cunt gladly took it.

He finally stopped bouncing you, rolling his hips into you and allowing you a few seconds of rest. He pulled his limp dick out but watching your pussy drip with a mixture of both your cum, he found himself hard once again. 

You barely had any time for your mind to clear up after, your eyes widening as Bucky forced you on your hands and knees. Not sparing a single second he rammed back into you, his hand smacking your ass hard. 

You let out a cry, the stinging pain from the spank only lasting for a short while before you felt the pain and pleasure of him filling you up again. 

“Tell me how much you love it,” He breathed out, watching your ass bounce against his hips with each thrust.

“Bucky!” You moaned out, your walls tightening around him again.

You barely had any time to recover from your last high and still sensitive. You started moving your ass against him, feeling his ballsack slapping your clit each time he thrusted. 

“I love it so much!” You breathed out. “I love feeling your big dick fill me up and fuck me!” 

You bit your lip, feeling the juices drip down your thighs. Your arms were starting to grow weak, barely able to hold yourself when you screamed again. Your pussy tightened and released, begging him to cum and fill you up again.

His large hands buried into your hips, continuing to fuck you as you released around him again. His build-up was growing with the sight of you taking his cock, thrusts growing sloppy. 

Bucky wasn’t blind and could tell your arms were going to give out. So, he released his grip on you with his metal arm to lean over you. He wrapped his arm around your chest, holding you up while squeezing your breast. 

Hearing your soft whimpers as he still fucked you did it for him, his hips bucking to release another hot load inside of you. He stayed in you until he finished then pulled out, releasing you to collapse on the bed. 

Weakly, you turned yourself on your back to look at him, face flushed and tear-stained. He lowered himself above you, metal arm pressed down near the side of your head to keep him above you. Bucky’s eyes danced over your facial features. His gaze moved down, watching your chest rise with each pant before looking at the mess in between your legs.

With his other hand, he reached down and dragged two fingers up your wet folds, gathering the juices on them. When he raised them back up to your face, both of your hands grabbed him and began to suck and lick his fingers clean.

“Christ you’re fucking beautiful.”

He pulled his fingers away, smashing his lips against yours. You wrapped your hands around his neck, a hand moving up to play and tug on his hair as you kissed.

[tommydarlings]

good girl gone bad | a.r

A/N: Thank you and no, it's not weird at all!And yeah ik, usually are my Requests blurbs but I wrote so much (cause I loved the Request) that I made it an oneshot! I hope you like this one! anyway, enjoy! :) ily, liz <3

Request: Hi lovie! I’m new to your page but I LOVE your fics! Could you do one where the reader is the innocent neighborhood good girl (like doesn’t curse and could do no wrong kind of deal) and the one time she does something wrong, Arvin Russell sets her straight (i.e. old fashioned, over his knee spanking on her little bum until she’s sore and red and TONS of aftercare) Maybe soft smut at the end? (and that’s a BIG maybe cause this is cute and smutty as it is, up to you ☺️) And I’m so sorry this is so long (and I’m sorry if this is too weird) 

pairing: Arvin Russel x reader

warnings: spanking, swearing

w/c: 0.9k

Requests: CLOSED

Summary: The innocent girl. That's what you are, but are you still so innocent when your boyfriend is Arvin Russel?

masterlist || taglist || requests ( in my masterlist)

You were the typical good girl. You were kind, had humor, pretty and always went to church to pray and show the lord that you could never do anything bad. Well, until you met Arvin Russel. The typical bad boy.

He went to church too, but only to sin. This boy was the definition of bad. But also the definition of hot. And that's why you kissed him just a few months ago.

You already met lenora, uncle earskeal and Emma. They were the nicest people ever. They were super kind and really cared about you.

Well Arvin was the opposite.

He was aggressive, rough and had zero patient. When Arvin wanted something, than he got it. Arvin was not really a bad person, he was just extremely protective over the people he loved. He was protective over his grandma, his uncle, his lil sister, but he was especially extremely protective over you, because you where his. And only his and everyone had to know that.

Arvin still went to church and prayed like everyone else in knockemstiff, but most of the time he sinned. He sinned that he had beaten up the bullies of lenora and that he secretly wanted to do really unfaithful things to you. He had the dirtiest thoughts a person could possibly have over you in his mind. Every. Single. Day.

He would never hurt you or would do anything with you and your body without your permission but sometimes, when he saw you walking around in that liitle skirt or the short dress that you love so much, he would imagine how he would throw you over his lap and spank you ass until he was red and you had tears in your eyes.

Like I said, unfaithful thought that no one should ever discover.

But you were the innocent little girl, the girl that everyone loves and no one could ever hate.

But today was too much for Arvin.

He always picked you up from school in his old car that he got from his father. But as you walked out of school in the shortest little skirt that Arvin ever saw, he almost explode.

"Hey baby" you said as you stepped into his car.

"Hello" he said with the coldest tone you ever heard.

"what's up bubu?" you asked as you noticed his tone and emotionless face expression.

"don't come me now with 'bubu' y/n, why are you wearing something like that?!" he said as he pointed at your new skirt.

He started the car and drove to his house.

"I'm sorry but I don't see your problem arvin"

"You don't fucking see my problem y/n?! Are you serious?!" he said as you both made your way into the house.

Luckily were lenora and grandma and uncle earskell gone today.

"it's just a skirt Arvin, I wear skirts every single day at school" you answered with slight fear in your voice.

"IT SHOWS OFF YOUR ENTIRE ASS Y/N" now he started to yell. And usually Arvin never yells at you.

"B-but I still d-don't understand why that matters t-to you Arvin" you whispered quietly.

"BECAUSE I OWN YOU Y/N, YOU UNDERSTAND?! YOUR MINE!" he yelled at you.

"I'M NOT YOURS YOU ASSHOLE" you yelled back at him.

That was a mistake.

"Did you just yelled at me and called me an 'asshole' " he slowly said as he backed you up against the wall in kitchen and put both of his arms next to your head.

"I-I'm sorry arvie" you quietly whisperd.

"I don't care if you are sorry y/n" he slowly leaned his head forward so that his mouth was directly above your ear,

"lift your little skirt and bend over my lap princess. Now" he whisperd quietly but with a deep voice.

You just looked at him for a few seconds before you lifted your skirt and he slowly made his way to one of the chairs in the kitchen.

You bend yourself over his lap and he gently started to rub both of his hands over your ass chekks.

"Are you gonna be a good girl for me? Are you gonna be good, for the lord?" he whisperd before he gave you a hard slap on your right ass cheek. You just started to whine and didn't gave him an answer.

"Give me a fucking answer"

"Yes, yes i'll be good"

"Yes what?"

"Yes D-daddy"

"Fuck, exactly what I imagined kitten" he said as he gave you another harsh slap on your cheek. After 5 other hard slap on your poor ass who was already completely red, tears started to stream down your face.

"Awww princess, you already cry? Poor little kitten, is getting spanked from her daddy and can't even take it" he said slowly while he rubbed the place on your cheek where he just slapped you hard.

"No, i-I can t-take it"

"I know princess, I know" he said before he gave you the hardest slap ever.

"Ahhh s-shit" you whispered quietly.

By the time he was finished with you, you were crying, your lip was trembling and your ass was on fire. Or at least it felt like it.

"Are you okay?" he asked while you sat on his lap with his clothes on.

"Yeah"

"I love you doll"

"I l-love you too Arvin"

After a little make out session you both went to bed and fell asleep in each other's arms. You love Arvin. And his hands.

-`ღ´- ᶫᵒᵛᵉᵧₒᵤ -`ღ´-

Taglist:

@goodgirlgonetom @majo240820 @misshale21 @itstaskeen @pure-ghost @justafangirlduh @elizabeth-brown @roseke @onyourgoddamnleft @lovelyxtom

[queenshelby]

Time for Change – Part Four

Pairing: Cillian Murphy x Reader

Warning: Smut

Words: 1,888

Notes: Not based on Cillian’s life. This is fiction guys! 

YOUR POV

It has been just over a week since you saw Cillian last and not one night went by during which you didn’t think about him and the incredible sex you had with him.

Whilst you had agreed that this was a going to be a one-night stand, you couldn’t help but fantasise about him over and over again.

Even when you were lying next to James who, two days ago, had returned from New York, you were thinking about Cillian’s body on top of yours and all the naughty things that he would do to you.

You wanted him, more than as a friend or casual lover. But you knew that, this was never going to be possible.

As far as James was concerned, you didn’t address his infidelity yet. You needed more proof and you desperately needed to see a lawyer to ensure that James couldn’t take Chloe away.

James and Chloe were both US citizens, but you were not and Chloe did not hold an Irish passport. You applied for one, but the Department of Immigration was taking a long time to process through the adoption papers. Chloe was adopted by you both when you lived in the US and Ireland was slow in recognising it. This meant that you were stuck with him for now if you wanted to remain in Ireland.

With that being the case, you ran into the problem of James wanting more from you than what you were willing to give. You knew that he was fucking at least one other woman and, therefore, you had no intention of being intimate with him. It disgusted you.

In the same vein, you had slept with another man, a man who was still on your mind and who had satisfied you more than James ever could, raising the stakes quite significantly.

You kept making excuses, telling him that you weren’t feeling well, had a stressful day or a headache. You hoped that, eventually, he would find someone else, perhaps even someone at his place of work.

CILLIAN’S POV

As for Cillian, he also had not spoken to Danielle about his intention to divorce. He struggled with the idea and the fact that he wouldn’t see his children every day if they separated.

Danielle had threatened to withhold the children many times over the past few years after endless allegations of affairs, none of which were true. She told him that, due to his line of work, she would seek full custody and he knew that she was likely going to be successful if he wasn’t home for several months at the time.

Her behaviour was relentless, even to the point where one of his old personal assistants had resigned due to her constant allegations.

Then, a year later, she went so far and shared her allegations and concerns with Cillian’s mother, causing Cillian to leave her for several months, which is when she made her threats real and withheld contact to his children until he came back to her.

In addition, his agent had advised him against moving forward with the separation until the next season of Peaky Blinders is released. In his mine, with nothing else being available for his followers to get their hands on, his separation would likely be dragged through the mud by the papers, making it more difficult for his career.

Cillian liked to stay out of the media as much as he could but, depending on where Danielle was to take this, this might not be possible and he started to weigh up his options.

Yet, he felt the same about the night you had shared. The images of you in bed with him drove him crazy and, whilst him and Danielle no longer were intimate, he felt guilty for sneaking into the bathroom almost every single night to masturbate with you on his mind.

Making a Date

To his surprise, at 8 o’clock on Thursday night, he received a text message from you, asking him whether he wanted to meet up with you and, of course, he did.

He was reluctant at first, knowing what was at stake and not knowing how far things would go when you met up again.  

He didn’t know what your intentions were and why you wanted to meet but, when you responded to his text message by asking whether you should get a hotel room, it became pretty clear to him that you were after intimacy.

Cillian was torn about it. It was cliché, that’s for sure. It even reminded him on a movie he had starred in a few years ago. But, the thought of being alone with you in a hotel room drove him crazy and his reasonable thought process came to a standstill.

‘Alright. Let’s meet at the Westin 5 o’clock tomorrow afternoon. I will book a room’ Cillian typed, before deleting it and then retyping it all again. He knew it was wrong, no matter how bad things were between him and Danielle.

Eventually, he decided to send it and you were quick to respond, agreeing to his proposed time and location.

The following day, you told James that you were meeting up with friends in town and might stay over at Emily’s house.

Cillian did the same and told Danielle that he was going out in Temple Bar with some of his friends and, whilst James didn’t mind and bought your excuse, Danielle was frustrated with Cillian for leaving her with the kids.

‘You better don’t come home drunk Cillian’ she growled angrily, causing Cillian to roll his eyes.

‘If I have too much, I will crash on my brother’s lounge’ he then responded, causing Danielle to huff and swear.

‘Seriously Danielle? You disappeared for a fucking week and you have a problem with me going out for one night?’ Cillian said, shaking his head before he slammed the door behind him.

The Hotel

‘Room 307. I left a key at reception’ Cillian texted as you were sitting in the back of the taxi.  

‘Can’t wait to see you. I didn’t bother wearing panties. I hope that is okay’ you texted back, teasing Cillian.

‘Good call. They would just have come off within minutes of you walking through the door’ he responded.

The texting went back and forth making you more and more excited. With each chime of your phone your pussy throbbed more and your ten-minute drive felt like it took forever and the short walk up to the hotel room was torture.

Your clit was so aroused that even the motion of your legs as you walked teased your pussy and made you just crave Cillian’s touch even more.

When you knocked on the door Cillian answered very quickly. He was wearing only a towel on his hips and you could see his freckle covered chest and the tops of his hips.

Quickly you entered and turned and locked the door behind you. You grabbed Cillian and kissed him passionately. As you did, moans escaped your mouth and you could feel Cillian's already hard cock press against you as his towel fell to the floor.

‘Fuck’ Cillian groaned as he saw you and, in one quick motion, he ripped your dress to the floor, kneeling in front of you as you stepped out of it. Without losing any time and before you could even have said hello to each other, Cillian pressed his face against your deliciously wet pussy and began to make circles around your clit with his tongue. He then slid one finger inside you and left it still.

‘Oh, fuck Cillian, please’ you begged as you craved more and moved your hip so that his finger teased you gently. Cillian then added a second finger and he curved them upward just slightly so that the tip of his fingers stroked your g-spot.

‘Oh god yes’ you moaned, wanting even more. Your body began to shake and your legs began to weaken as you grew close to orgasm.

You leaned your back against the door to prevent yourself from crumbling to the floor. Cillian then began to suck on your clit and as he did you screamed out. Your legs shook and you had to grab a hold of the door handle to prevent yourself from falling to the ground.

‘Oh my god, I'm cumming’ you screamed with passion and lust in your voice.

Cillian kept teasing your pussy after waves of pleasure rolled through your body. You gained control of your balance again and became steady on your legs. You then grabbed Cillian by the shoulders and pulled him up to kiss him, tasting your juices on his lips and tongue.

‘Well, it’s good to see you’ he finally grinned as your lips drifted apart.

‘Now this Mr Murphy, was a nice welcome’ you said before kissing him again passionately.

‘Now it’s my turn’ you then said as you pushed him back towards a chair in the corner of the room and made him sit down.

Within seconds, you pushed his legs apart and went down on your knees in between them and took his cock in your mouth.

‘Fuck Y/N’ Cillian groaned as, first, you just lightly sucked on the tip of his cock, flicking your tongue on the tip.

This was something Danielle hadn’t done to him in a very long time and it didn’t take long for another small growl to come out to the back of Cillian's throat.

With this encouragement you took his entire cock into your mouth devouring all seven inches of his amazing cock. You deepthroated his cock starting off slowly and as you got quicker Cillian pulled your hair encouraging you to go faster and faster on his cock.

‘Jesus Y/N’ Cillian groaned as you tilted your head back to catch your breath and stood up.

After you gave Cillian another passionate kiss, you climbed on top of his lap, facing him and allowing him to play with and suck on your breasts while you lowered yourself onto his cock with a loud moan.  

You rode his cock slowly at first and worked up to speed, panting as your clit rubbed against his hips. You could feel your pleasure building inside you as you could feel yourself becoming ready to orgasm again. Cillian continued to play with your hard nipples until finally he slipped his hand between your legs and rubbed your clit in a circular motion. This sent you over the edge and you started cumming again.

‘Fuck, Y/N, that’s it’ Cillian groaned as your walls contracted around his hard cock, milking him and sending him over the edge as well.

You came in sync and could feel Cillian filling you with his warm cum, coating your walls and cervix as you rode out your orgasms.

‘That was amazing’ you huffed out eventually and Cillian kissed you again passionately.

‘I fucking needed this’ he chuckled after your lips drifted apart.

‘Me too’ you giggled. ‘So, are we going to make use of this amazing spa tub?’ you then asked as you slowly lifted yourself off Cillian, causing a large amount of his cum to leak out of you and onto Cillian’s lap.

‘I would say let’s have a bath, then order some room service and then have some more sex’ Cillian suggested.

‘Sounds like a fabulous idea’ you smiled.

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