#and new years day being the ONLY instrumental track

[edwardshundredyearoldspunk]

people who think new years day doesn't fit in reputation because it's an intimate instrumental and clashes against the complex production of the rest of the record don't actually get the central thesis statement of reputation

[luvergirl777]

Sweet Girl | Spencer Reid

Pairing | Spencer Reid x Reader

Word Count | 3k, not bad. 

Genre | Fluff, Smut 

Summary | Spencer is tired, so tired. He knows only one thing could possibly cheer him up. His sweet girl.

Index | Kinda sub Spencer, he's tired and want's to be taken care of, you're more than happy to do that, smut, unprotected sex, love confessions lol, they're perfect for each other, established relationship, pinning, cute shit.

There are so many thoughts in Spencer’s brain, there always is. It’s impossible for them to slow down, he’s always so busy. Even when he’s not working, he’s thinking about the next case, the next degree, the next time he’ll be called into office for a dire case. It’s exhaustive and it feels impossible to just breathe for more than a moment. His morale started to slip, work becoming messy, cases blurring together, memory almost shot.

Until he met you, everything was hard, until he met you. It was an accident, technically. His morning coffee cafe wasn’t open, forcing him to break his routine that he’s had for months. As soon as he spotted you, the new (and out of his way) cafe instantly became his new favorite. Smart and kind, the sweetest smile always worn on your face. He swears you’re the smartest person he’s ever met, always ignoring you whenever you point out his multiple PHDs and ever continuous education journey. 

You force him to look at things differently, not really trying to, but you do. It’s refreshing, it’s amazing to him how it works, a breath of fresh air. Since he’s realized the difference in himself when he’s with you, he’s fallen head over heels. Your apartment is small and cozy, warm lighting and blankets everywhere. He’s at your apartment more than he is his own, feels more at home. 

You ease his mind, make everything easier. He can just be himself around you without any worry about needing to prove something. He can relax for the first time in what feels like years. It almost kills him to have to go away for cases, kills him even more when the cases last weeks or months. He spares you almost all the details, much like Garcia whenever he can. It’s not what you signed up for. Even when you ask, he only really tells you public knowledge. He keeps you separate from his work, he needs you separate from his work. His sweet girl, he’d like to keep it that way. 

Spencer’s exhausted, beyond exhausted he thinks. He can’t remember the last time he’s been away from you for this long, the last time he’s truly felt this horrible. His shoulders are heavy, eye bags growing from the exhausting 3 weeks he’s had. Kill, after kill, after kill, with no motive, no tracts, no suspects. He felt like a newbie again at the BAU, unable to track down their unsub. It feels like he’s failing everyone and himself, it was beginning to tear him down. 

Nightmare after nightmare, he was almost unable to sleep for the three weeks he’s been gone. The day they found the unsub, he almost cried with relief. The entire team almost cried, really. Generally he’s not emotional by any means, tries to stay objective in his work, but this time he just couldn’t. He’s happy, thrilled, to be home despite admittedly being a bit dishevelled from the trip. Unshaven, worn down, exhausted, eye bags, the list goes on and on. 

You’ve missed him too, but you’ve tried to keep your calling and texting at bay so as to not distract him from his work. As he makes his way home, you almost bubble with excitement. The door is loud as it unlocks, heavy click overpowering the soft instrumental vinyl that was filling the silence. Your feet run to meet him at the door, more than excited. The door opens, revealing a tired Reid. It’s the worst you’ve seen him in awhile, maybe in over a year you think. 

You’ve known Spencer for a while now, seen arguably the worst sides of him. This isn’t quite that, but it is pretty close to it. The slouch and far-out look tells you almost everything you need to know. 

“Oh, Spence.” You call to him softly, watching as his feet don’t move, eyes taking you in as you cautiously approach him as if he were a wounded animal. He doesn’t say anything, watching as you reach for his shoulders. He doesn’t need to say anything for you to understand, hands gently cupping his face and thumbs gently rubbing his cheeks as you comfort him. “Come, step inside.” You almost whisper, gently pulling him inside by his hands, warm. 

A small smile grows on his face as you take off his suit jacket, palms massaging his shoulders and biceps as you do so. You sway softly to the music, almost dancing into the kitchen as you pull him along. “Let’s eat, Spence.” You smile, sitting him down first. At this level, you easily reach his temple where you place a soft kiss. You don’t have to, but you’re more than happy to prepare a plate for Spencer. The music is comforting, the two of you sitting close, your foot brushing against his leg when you cross your legs. 

You happily clean up after the two of you, dancing around the kitchen as you entertain Spencer in the meantime. “How’re you feeling?” You hum, Spencer’s arms wrapping around your waist as you stand directly in front of him. He easily pulls you forward into his embrace. Your arms wrap around his neck, his face burying into the crook of your shoulder as you do so. 

“Better.” It’s all you need, all he needs to say. He’s putty in your hands as you softly pull him forward and off the kitchen bench, easily leading him to the shower. 

He’s so grateful for you, he thinks silently, to himself. He’s never felt like this for someone, and for the longest time, he was afraid he just couldn’t. He could never understand wanting someone with you everyday of the year, living in the same space, sharing everything. The thought used to make him nauseous. The thought of being with someone intimately used to make his skin crawl. But with you, it’s different, everything is different. 

He craves coming home to you, craves your touch after a long day, craves hearing your voice, craves your presence, craves your intimacy. He melts in your hold, his brain is able to finally shut off after a long day. All the thoughts, running miles a minute, goes away. 

He feels like he could cry as you run a shower for him, gently unbuttoning his white button up, fiddling with his belt to take off his pants, kissing his skin better, unknowingly healing him. “Y/n, please shower with me.” He mumbles, kicking his shoes and pants off, undressing the rest of the way. He steps in, watching as you undress before quickly joining him. 

“I’ve been worried about you, pretty boy.” You smile as you step inside, his arms immediately wrapping around your body. He’s tired and homesick, obviously so as he sinks into you. 

“I know, I know,” He nods along, hands sliding up to hold your head in his palms. “I’m okay, I promise.” Spencer smiles, gently kissing your forehead, back down to your cheeks, and finally connecting your lips. You immediately return the kiss, desperate for his touch, his lips on yours. 

“I know you are.” You smile, mumbling against his lips. Spencer smiles too, pulling you deeper into the kiss, closer to his body. You can’t help the small moan that slips when you feel him against you, shaky hands pu\lling him closer roughly by his back. 

“It’s always the best coming back to you, though,” Spencer almost groans into your mouth, making you weak in the knees as he does so. “I can hold my own, but there’s nothing better than coming home to you.”

“Spence, we gotta clean you up,” You almost whimper at your own words, sadly pulling away from him. “Had a rough couple of weeks.” Spencer just nods along, allowing you to do as you please. He’d let you do anything, always. He melts as your hands meet his hair, shampooing and conditioning. He doesn’t melt when you wash his body, quite the opposite as his skin burns hot as your hands rub along his body. 

“Please,” Spencer whines, quickly doing the same for you. He needs to get out of this before he loses his mind, he thinks. As soon as you’re both clean, his lips almost slam against yours, needy, almost desperate. “I’ve missed you so much,” He whines, complaining. 

“Come, Spence.” You mumble, lips against his shoulder as you talk to him. Your face and ears are burning hot, wanting to get out of the shower quickly. Spencer follows you without a hitch, quickly wrapping the both of you in fizzy towels as he places another kiss to your shoulder. “I’ve missed you, Spencer.” You smile at him, walking backwards out of the bathroom. He follows happily, a tired smile painted across his features. A towel hangs low on his waist as he follows. 

“I’m really tired, hun, I won’t lie.” Spencer mumbles as he sits down on the bed, fluffy towel becoming loose when his grip leaves it. A whimper leaves his lips when you straddle his hips, core bare as you lower your weight. He can feel your warmth, mind growing fuzzy almost immediately as you wrap your arms around his shoulders, holding him close. You don’t make a move to hurry things up, only tucking his hair behind his ears as you glance over his face. 

“So pretty, Spencer.” You mumble as you talk to him, continuing to play with his hair. “I’ll do the work, I just want you to feel good. Feel good after being away for so long, working so hard,” You mumble against his shoulder as you kiss it. Your town easily falls backwards off of your shoulders, leaving you bare on top of Spencer. “You gonna let me do that? Gonna be good?”

“Yes, yes please.” Spencer mumbles, roughly connecting your lips. His grip tangles in your hair, pulling as close as he possibly can. You whine into his mouth, hips grinding against him, so close yet so far, chest pressed flush against his own. You lift yourself onto your knees, pulling at Reid’s towel to move it off of his lap. You drop your weight back down as soon as possible, grinding against Reid’s cock, easily slipping through your folds. 

“Want you, miss you so much,” You complain, for no particular reason. You know Spencer is more than happy to give you what you want, almost wants it just as badly. “I want it.”

“Take it, sweet girl, take it.” He groans into your mouth, sloppily kissing you as if his life depends on it. His palms knead at your flesh, touching and holding everything you can reach. You whimper when his hands knead your inner thighs, so close to where you need him the most. “Need it just as bad. I’ve missed you so much, love you so much.”

Your hips lift up, Spencer helping you out the slightest as he lines up his cock for you. Your legs shake as you sink back down, hips connecting with a small slap. You both share a moan, needy hands pulling one another as close as physically possible. Spencer throbs as you grind against his cock, completely inside you, clit rubbing against his skin. It doesn’t feel that good to him, but watching you shake and whimper is almost enough to get him off. 

“I love you, Spencer.” You mumble, finally building the strength to lift yourself up, bouncing on his cock. You know exactly what Spencer likes, what he wants, moving exactly how he needs you to. You know where he’s sensitive, how to get him to tick. As you kiss his neck and squeeze around him, he swears he can stay here forever with you. He wants to stay forever, not here, maybe not this specifically, but with you. He wants to be with you, forever. 

“Y/N, I- oh fuck,” Spencer whines as you speed up, desperately chasing his moans, wanting to hear him. He feels embarrassingly close already, all of his senses full of you. You’re so tight and warm, goosebumps spreading across his skin. “Y/N, will you, uh, I want-” His words break off as he moans, feeling his abs tighten up as he fights off the urge to cum. To combat it, his fingers dip in between your bodies, gently rubbing circles into your sensitive clit. 

“Spencer, oh fuck.” You whine, tightening around him even more. “Gonna cum, you’re gonna make me cum.” You bite softly into his chest, whimpers muffled by his skin. 

“Marry me,” Spencer whines, voice muffled and whiny. You don’t register his words, focused on the way his fingers rub circles into your clit, his other hand roughly guiding your hips as you bounce up and down on his cock, vice grip around him. Your thighs are shaking, teetering on the edge that you’re so close to falling off of. “Y/N, marry me.” Spencer's hands stop your movement entirely, giving you no stimulation as he holds your hips flush to his. 

“I-Spence, you’re mean-”

“Marry me, Y/N.” He cuts you off, not listening to the way you’re about to call him all sorts of names. “I love you so, so much. So perfect to me, Y/N. I want to be with you, forever. Please, marry me. I promise I’ll ask you in a cheesy, over the top way later, and we can say that was the official proposal. I never want to come home to anyone else but you.” 

“Spencer,” You can’t help the whine that struggles to escape your lips, squeezing around him even tighter. His grip doesn’t let up, holding you completely still. “This is a bit crazy to ask when I was about to cum all over your cock.” You giggle, hands coming to hold his face as your mind begins to clear just the slightest bit. “You know that, right?”

“I-I know. I was just thinking-” He starts, releasing his grip on you once he realizes your plight, allowing you to grind against him for some sort of stimulation. 

“You do that, a lot.” You giggle softly, biting back the moans as you move on top of him. 

“You do so much for me. It’s like, like when I’m with you, my brain quiets down. I don’t have to worry, don’t have to think a hundred miles a minute. I can just be me, when I’m with you.” Spencer rambles on, brows creasing as you speed up your movement, desperate to get there once again. “I can let you take care of me, love being around you.” 

“Spence, we’re gonna look back at this and laugh.” You giggle as you grind against his cock. Spencer goes back to rubbing tight circles against your clit, moaning when you tighten around him again, beginning to move up and down. 

“So, I’ll take that as a no th-”

“Of course, Spencer. Of course I’ll marry you, my pretty boy.” You grin hard, watching as his face completely lights up, matching your giant smile. A giant squeal escapes when he quickly flips the two of you over, your back hitting the bed before you can protest. “Spencer! I thought you were tired.” You laugh, immediately being shut up when his hips begin to move. 

“I was.” Spencer smiles, hips driving forward into you. You’re already so close, so worked up, that the change in position almost sends you over. “Now I have a fiance, it’s a bit exciting, you see.” Spencer laughs at your circumstance, all of the wit wiped clean as you mewl and moan underneath him. He does his best to sooth the shake in your thighs, hands rubbing the soft skin underneath them, hips never slowing. Like you, he knows what you like, exactly what you like, his memory doesn’t allow him to forget it. 

“You- oh fuck,” You whimper as he rubs ghost like circles into your clit, not needing much more stimulation and he knows that. 

“Come for me, please. Wanna feel you, want to hear it, need it Y/N.” He groans, leaning forward to kiss you, sloppy and messy. You’re trapped underneath him, the weight somehow overwhelming and exactly what you need. At the change of angle, his cock hits exactly where you need him, hips grinding against your clit with each movement. 

“Oh fuck, fuck, Spencer, coming.” You whimper, hands reaching for his back, scratching and pulling him closer. You’re almost impossible to push into as you cum, so sensitive and aroused that you clench so tightly around him. He whimpers into your skin, finally coming unraveled as it all catches up to him as well. 

“Good girl, so good.” Spencer groans into your skin. “Gonna cum for you, okay?” You nod eagerly, legs wrapping around his waist as you pull him close. 

“Cum inside, Spence, my sweet fiance.” You whine, thighs shaking from overstimulation. The name makes him fold, the way it slips so easily from your lips making him melt instantly. 

“Cumming, cumming.” He whines, sloppy thrusts slowing down as he does. You can’t help but whine with him, clit so sensitive that it’s almost driving you crazy. 

“Spencer,” You whine loudly, legs tightening to stop his movement completely. You’re too sensitive, it’s too much for you. “I love you.” You mumble, pulling him in for a kiss. 

“Love you, so much, the most.” Spencer mumbles, words soft and sincere as he speaks. Your legs slowly unwrap, sore and tired as you finally rest them. He’s moving slow as well, trudging into the bathroom for a damp towel to clean the two of you up. He’s almost sluggish by the time he’s done, tossing the towel into the bathroom without even really looking. You almost expect it as he collapses next to you, completely spent with his legs hanging off the bed. 

You giggle softly, rolling your eyes at the dramatics as he finally fully crawls into bed. You crawl next to him, propped up onto your elbow as you look down. “So, we're gonna tell our friends you asked me to marry you while balls deep?” You laugh almost directly into his face, hand coming to push hair behind his ear. 

“No.” It’s stern and final, no arguments accepted. At this, you laugh loudly. 

“C’monn, it would be funny, Morgan would love it.”

“That’s exactly why I’m scared. Listen, let’s sleep, before I rethink this decision.” He jokes dryly, a smile on his face when you finally give it up. You pull him close, cuddling into his side. 

“You’d never.”

“You’re right.” He hums, eyes falling shut. “I love you too much.”

[ovwechoes]

Talon & Secret Talents (Headcanons) Super indulgent, but these are what I think the members of Talon would have their secret talent as. My asks are open and requests are welcome, enjoy (they're under the cut c:)

Akande Ogundimu / Doomfist: I can honestly imagine Akande being incredibly good at Luthiery, which is crafting and repairing string instruments like guitars and violins. He taught himself years ago, and has continued honing his skills, modifying instruments and making them out of unconventional materials just to prove to himself he can do it. It's something Akande takes great pride in, serving as a way for him to relax with something mindless and meticulous.

Gabriel Reyes / Reaper: Gabriel has a secret talent for wine and beer making, often spending months at a time making some for his wife, or his colleagues for their birthday. He'll never tell them that he made it, just that it was the cheapest in the store to throw them off his track. Gabriel was taught by his dad how to, and has since loved making it out of ingredients that you wouldn't expect, like sugary sweets or caffeinated drinks. He enjoys the time spent carefully watching it brew, spending weeks to months focused on making sure it tastes divine.

Moira O'Deorian: Honestly I like to think that Moira's good at embroidery, especially cross stitching. She was taught how to do it by her mother, who was taught by their mother and so on. It's a family gift, and she values the time spent carefully making beautifully woven creations. She used to fabric dye too, taking her time with an airbrush to make the most beautiful Ada for people to buy from her. It's her secret hobby, and it helps her to unwind especially if she can't sleep that night.

Siebren de Kuiper / Sigma: Siebren's always enjoyed writing, finding it to be the best way to express his thoughts and feelings. Over time, his writing has become more erratic, scattered, and incoherent. It's something that weighs on his mind from time to time, but he enjoys reading back his older works, like diary entries or poetry he's written. It fills him with a hope of returning to that mental state, and writing in and of itself helps him to clear the echoing thoughts that linger each day. 

Amelie Lacroix / Widowmaker: Amelie has always loved dressmaking, and considers herself to be a talented seamstress. She's always enjoyed it, and it's something even Talon wouldn't be able to pry from her hands. Amelie made her wedding dress, cocktail dresses for parties, and likes to make new patterns for future designs as often as possible. It's something meticulous, and helps to focus her mind on something that won't impact her negatively. Often, Moira and Olivia will ask Amelie to make them designs that she thinks would compliment them, but wouldn't expect her to make the dress completely for them, often tailoring it to be absolutely perfect on them. It's not as much of a secret talent as she'd like it to be, with Moira and Olivia being the only people that know about it. However, she values their opinions on her work, and appreciates the way they express their gratitude over the dresses she makes for them. It makes her feel as though she has a purpose again; one that doesn't have a road of dead bodies following her.

Olivia Colomar / Sombra: Olivia's scarily gifted at photography and photo editing. She has a secret blog and secret twitter to share her creations, to conceal her identity and prevent anyone finding them. Her works are based on her traumas, and the things going on in Dorado that she can't prevent. They're often thought provoking, bringing light to the things that people often overlook. She likes to add an element of hope into the images, and likes to add a line that adds to the work to each post. They're not popular by any means, with rarely anyone interacting with them, but she doesn't care - as long as someone's documenting the way her home is being destroyed by the violence, she's content. It's something she intends to keep private, and she doesn't want to attach her face or name to the images she's creating.

Maugaloa Malosi: Maugaloa has a talent for memorising and recalling information - even when he was a child, he was applauded for his ability to recall exact details of the smallest things from months ago. It's something he prides himself on, but doesn't talk about often enough, wanting to utilise this skill when it'll suit him the most. He enjoys the ability to memorise things, often seeing it as a weapon ready to be used whenever he needs/wants.

[atlitudes]

I'm Cataloging Every Occurrence of the Piano in Malevolent in a Spreadsheet for Leitmotif Analysis. No, I'm Not Kidding.

As the title of this post reads, I've spent the last few weeks listening to every episode of Malevolent and logging every time the piano is heard (both within the story and as background score), to analyze the data for leitmotif/music based theory-crafting. I originally was planning on getting through the entire series before posting anything, but I am very quickly realizing that this is going to take me a while, and I start a new semester in two weeks, so there is a high likelihood I will not finish before I get too busy to chug through as many episodes a day as I am now. I'm on episode 16/44 and I've already logged 137 instances of piano music. I'm not even halfway done. And this is all I've been doing for the past multiple days. For this reason, I've decided to post the link to the spreadsheet before finishing.

If you're familiar with Malevolent, and just how much music is in it, you might be asking, "OP, are you utterly fucking insane?" And well, dear reader, the answer to that is probably yes, but while you might call it madness, I call it love. So, before getting into the meat of things, I wanted to explain why I even decided to do this. Spoilers ahead for Malevolent (obvious, but yeah). If you don't give a single shit about why I did this and want to get straight to the sheet, scroll to the bottom for the link.

So. About 2 weeks ago I finished my first listen-through of Malevolent. One thing about the most recent episodes struck me as very very significant: John and Arthur's "collective force" being titled as the Dies Irae.

Now, a full-bodied explanation of why I find this so important and the possible implications will come at a later date, but long story short, the Dies Irae is a very significant piece of musical literature-- it is, perhaps, the most commonly quoted leitmotif of the past 800 years, and it symbolizes death. So, understandably, the Themes of this kinda sent me down a spiral.

But the Dies Irae being mentioned in such a way also got me thinking: music is a pretty integral part of Malevolent. So, is the Dies Irae quoted anywhere in its soundtrack? I suddenly got very very excited at this prospect, particularly if it might be in Faroe's Song, because well... god that would hurt lol. I scoured the available songs on the bandcamp aaaaand... no luck (as far as I can tell). Regardless, even if the Dies Irae wasn't a part of the soundtrack, I became curious about what kind of leitmotifs were in the podcast, and what they might mean. And so, the spreadsheet was born.

I explain this in the User Guide part of the sheet (please read it before going through the rest btw), but I only track the piano parts of the podcast. The reason for this is two-fold:

First, score wise, piano is very easy for me to pick apart, and I don't see a lot of significance in the suspenseful string music for horror moments (though I don't deny there might be something to it, I simply won't be able to find it.) To me, the piano is also significantly more important than the strings because it's a notable part of the story-- Arthur and his relation to the instrument is a key part of the plot, and multiple of the piano compositions are made by him. For this reason, I found tracking the piano in the podcast worthwhile.

Second, I also don't touch any of the non-original radio tracks in the podcast (i.e. You Call It Madness (I Call It Love)) because this video by The Final Fantasmagorie already does an excellent job of covering them (please check it out!!), and I felt it would be redundant, especially considering the astronomical amount of ground I already have to cover. If these tracks start being featured as leitmotifs in the piano music then... well, I might change my mind, but so far, no dice.

If I noticed a non-piano piece of music (such as the wraith humming in Ep3) that I haven't found any analysis of whatsoever, I also noted it just so there was some record. Other than that, just piano tracks.

Explanations and disclaimers out of the way, here is the link to the spreadsheet. I might open it up to comments and/or editors at some point, but for now, it's just available to viewers. Once again, please read the disclaimer and user guide before the rest of the sheets.

Thanks for reading, I know this was a very long post, and I appreciate it if you've beared with me! Enjoy!

[valeriianz]

For the fic writer asks:

4. Obviously you did research for BitB. I'd love you to ramble about it if you like I'm sure you've got STORIES

5. Did you outline it?

7. How'd you decide it would be Hob's pov?

25-27 I'd love to know a/some favorite lines, details, and any lore you might want to share

omg TJ what wonderful questions! thank you!! this is going to get LONG!

4: Rambling about research!

do you wanna see a screen shot of my bookmarks under my "band au" folder?

man, and that's only what could fit on the screen.

there is... SO MUCH i chose to ignore for this fic. ideas that i had to drop, lines or extra details about the other band members equipment. more logistics, what Lucienne actually does, what Mervyn has to put up with as the new touring stage manager... i realized very early on that i couldn't possibly cram all this (super cool and eye opening) information into the fic and still keep reader's interest and, most importantly, to not stray away from the fact that this is a dreamling fic. whenever i felt myself getting carried away with a side character or job or even social media numbers, gossip, outside POVs, i had to reign myself in and get back on track. there will be time for exploring everything i missed in side stories after BitB is finished. i just hope i still have the energy to write it all.

once, i was so deep into research that after publishing chapter 2, i went into work and when my chef asked what "GA" meant on my prep list, i answered with full confidence, "general admission."

(it means "get ahead.")

the worst part of this entire writing process is im still learning new shit. i havent rewatched or read a lot of what i've saved because, to be very honest, i was feeling a little burnt out. it's why we're kinda full steam dreamling now. it's why ive been glossing over a lot of technical stuff and being vague about conversations amongst the crew/not including it at all. i don't prefer ignoring my research, but at the end of the day i want to still enjoy writing this fic and finish it. even if i can't be as descriptive and detailed and nuanced as i used to be.

5: Did you outline the fic?

(also asked by @hardly-an-escape!)

i wouldn't call what i have a proper "outline," it's more like a 20k word document filled to the brim with notes that i skim at least a dozen times while i'm writing a new chapter (being in my brain is literally hell). i live multichapter life very dangerously. i copy and paste lines or sections (always scattered, never together! augh!) that are meant to go together and plop them in a new document titled "band au ch.#" and then i structure the chapter around what i want to happen.

but to answer this question in the plainest of terms: yeah. i know exactly what's going to happen up until the very end. even if its all in my head and the only concrete shit that's written down are beats/plot points. i'll figure out the rest later!

7: How'd you decide it would be Hob's POV?

i actually never even considered writing it from Dream's POV. this was my first fic in the fandom (which is so nuts to think about lol) and writing in Dream's POV sounded so scary lol. i also just thought Hob's would be easier because i have worked a few backstage shows, back in my college years. i figured eh, i can make this work. and i loved exploring how weird and mysterious musicians can be, from a normie's POV. making Hob a fan first and having him worry about developing a parasocial relationship... it was fun to explore.

25: Share your favorite line

oh god, i have so many haha.

“What are you thinking about?” starting in ch.2 and onward lmao

“It’s–” Dream laughs quietly, bitterly. “I don’t like change.” He says each word with emphasis, eyes trailing down to fixate somewhere past Hob. “And I still hold onto the things I can control, like my instruments–” his eyes swing up to regard Hob apologetically. “Or my clothes or my–” he brings a hand up and wiggles his fingers around his head. “My hair.” ch.4

"His majesty is pleased." ch.5

“You are obsessive,” he states, slow and cool and with a quiet smile cracking through his composure. “Just like me.” ch.7

“You look good.” Hob has to lean in to say so, unwilling to raise his voice amongst the roar of the fans. ch.11

“Del looks like porcelain, but she’s actually made of steel.” Desire swirls the contents of their glass before pushing their shoulders back with a deep breath. “She's tougher than all of us.” ch.11

“Everything. I want…” his fingers tighten in Hob’s hair, pulling him closer, speaking against his lips. “…Everything.” ch.14

26: Share your favorite detail

how intentionally coy Dream behaves. i love keeping him a mystery and deciding when and how much to allow his intentions to peek through has been so fun lol.

Despair is in fact covered in tattoos and piercings! i say this because i feel like sometimes i forget lmao. (but also her and Hob don't interact much so. my bad haha).

Delirium's constant explosion of color in the way she dresses <3

Hob's dedication to his job, Dream, and the people he cares about the most. i don't care if people think i'm making him too soft and good, im gonna project on that man and make him a sweet, sweet simp lmao

and ah, this doesn't matter anymore, and i kinda regret doing it but. i originally had Dream's favorite bass all black but the pickguard was white. so it actually looked like Jessamy. not gonna lie when @designtheendless drew it all black i decided i liked it better that way. and truly i do. that's when i went back to ch.1 and changed it haha. to actually see the guitar with Dream, all done up sparkling black and purple flecks... gosh it's just so him. but then i got up to the reveal that the guitar's name was Jessamy and i was like, "oh, right." lmao. no one seems to care so i'll leave it be.

27: Share a piece of lore you made up for the story

i have a lot lmao. and this post is already so long... im hoping i can get to some if not all of it in side fics in the future. but for now, here's some that's more like headcanons but:

Dream hates flying. he can full on go into panic attacks on the plane if he allows himself to get into his own head.

this was mentioned briefly in ch.4, while Dream was discussing the formation of the band, but Despair was in another band before joining Endless. she is the only character in the fic who gets to keep her English roots (lol sorry) and is the oldest in the band (30).

all of the band members ages: Dream, Desire, and Death are all 28 and Delirium is 22.

Dream can experience subdrop after going too hard during a performance.

Dream paints his own nails, it's very therapeutic.

as an exercise, i explored my own headcanons for Dream in this verse in a word doc, and one thing i will share from it that you might find interesting: If I were to ever give Dream a theological values, I would describe him as a satanist. He is a physical and pragmatic person, nonconforming, and although he is introverted, he enjoys being a part of a community (he loves his band).

also found this in my notes: How Desire and Dream got along was Death making them fight it out. Hob raises an eyebrow “like in a brawl?” He couldn't imagine Desire throwing hands. “No, in a pillow fight that escalated in hair pulling and verbal taunts.”

fic writer asks

[starsreminisce]

I've seen a lot of E/riels say that they can see Elain and Az having a book together because Lucien has so much going on that it makes sense for him to have his own book, so he can then add healing a broken bond with Vassa. Vassa can get the "Yrene treatment" when she's being introduced as Lucien's love interest.

Simply put, Lucien has too much going on that it'll remove Elain's importance from his journey as he goes from Emissary to the Night Court to The Heir of the Day Court.

Three issues with this:

Firstly, SJM spoke separately about how she is looking forward to telling Elain's story, and then a couple of years later, she starts speaking about how she's excited to explore Azriel's story.

Why would SJM emphasize Azriel if he were going to be told at the same time as Elain while she's keeping extremely quiet about exploring Lucien's story?

Why would SJM hype up the MMC in Elain’s story?

Secondly, Elain's story is already tied with Lucien. Rhys already stated Lucien's list of responsibilities. Tamlin is not getting better if he could not "master his guilt and his grief to become what he once was". If there was anyone who could speak to Tamlin, considering that Elain had benefited the most from Tamlin's generosity, who can persuade anyone with her words, and who would have an understanding over his motives considering she expressed to Nesta that Nesta's lack of action was not her fault, it would be Elain. The canon that was described that even her scent invoked Spring and how the Night Court black sucked the life out of her is enough to show that she'll be instrumental in bringing the Spring Court back.

Also, Elain's powers were only shown clearly twice: when Lucien was near her to the point that feeling her through the bond was enough to bring forth a vision that came to pass and considering that she was able to track the Suriel psychically and it was revealed that Helion had found Feyre "using whatever gift he possessed that allowed him to sense such things."

Lucien claims his eye can be able to sense things, but is it really a coincidence that he got his eye around the same time Helion became High Lord of Day for him to have the same powers as his father?

Lastly, Azriel's story is diverging away from Elain.

The Yrene treatment is already given to someone else. Did Gwyn not develop the same way as Yrene did? Backstory? Check. Relevance? Check. Development? Well, she was right next to Nesta when she went from being scared to leave the library to wanting to climb the peak to her yelling at Nesta that she refuses to leave her here.

Gwyn holds an Illyrian title, Gwyn has an interest in the 26 worlds, Gwyn wants to travel somewhere new.

"Not as Illyrians, not for their titles, but as something new. To prove to them, to everyone, that something new and different might triumph over their rules and restrictions."

And maybe Az, with his issues over his background as an Illyrian, to explore more its beginnings, especially more about Enalius, to join Gwyn on that journey when they finally decide to combine Valkyrie and Illyrian techniques.

The amount of concrete parallels between Lucien and Elain and Azriel and Gwyn far overshadows the curiosity of how a broken bond would look like.

What e/riel bring to the table is small potatoes to compared to what both elucien and Gwynriel offer to the overarching story.

Both Elain and Azriel made their choice already. Accept it.

[gordonradiotv]

A (Long Overdue) Celebration

Ah, hello, Readers!

It's Jox again! Some of you probably knew me as "Toony" back in the day, but it's been a looong while since I used that name. And it's been a long while since this blog ended!

On May 23rd, 2020 I started this little ask blog not expecting it to become much. But because of all of you, it blew up into something absolutely incredible! I wish I had the words to describe how this blog changed my life. I met my fiance because of this blog. I met lifelong friends. I gained the confidence to pursue independent passion projects like my webcomic Tip The Ferrymen and others. It's kinda insane to think a tumblr ask blog based on the haha funny HL youtube series would've had such an impact on my life.

So, I wanted to do something to celebrate the blogs 4 anniversary! Unfortunately we are a bit late to the mark due to some wild stuff that happened earlier this year, but better late than never! But finally it is done and finally Tumblr let me actually upload these lmfao. Without further ado, I want to announce:

GordonRadioTV's Soundtrack has been FULLY remastered!

With help from my lovely creative partner and fiance @stygiuscantus , the soundtrack for this blog has been fully remastered! Now, you can experience the whole story again with a fresh coat of paint. The tracks are also available on Selene's bandcamp, they're "pay what you want" as well! If you want to support Selene's work, here's a good place to do it!

I am also aware that some of you may be disappointed that the old tracks are gone, but for extremely private reasons that I will not be disclosing I no longer feel comfortable having those tracks up on this blog. To me, this is a fresh start to a project I hold dear to my heart and allows me to experience it all over again. I have loved every moment of working with Selene and she has put so much heart and effort into this, so cheers to new beginnings!

Selene herself also wanted to say a few words, which are included here:

"Four years ago, a friend of mine linked a little blog called GordonRadioTV in one of our Discord servers. Being fixated on HLVRAI at the time, I quickly checked it out, only for it to genuinely, actually make me laugh. I think I read all of the chapters up to that point (up to 3, I think?) in one go, because it was such a novel storytelling medium to me, and I was immediately enraptured. Little did I know that this little funny Half-Life blog would quite literally change my life, introducing me to new friends, inspiring me to experiment with my own art forms, and helped me find the love of my life, to whom I now life with together and am engaged to. Whenever Jox needed a new composer, I jumped in to help on short-notice, giving myself a brief crash-course on music theory to do so. I started this project months ago in the hopes that I would get it done in time for the anniversary, but, well, making 20 tracks takes a long time. I tried to put a lot of thought and love into each track, with each character having their own instrumental motif, and even some melodic motifs (namely for Gordon and Benrey). I truly hope that all of you like it; I am honored to be a part of the legacy of something that's so important to me."

-Selene Highchurch

Thank you all for everything. I have said it a million times, and I wish I had a new way to phrase it, but this blog means so much to me. This project means so much. Your support means so much to me. These stories are mine as much as they are yours, so much of this story wouldn't have existed without your participation. Thank you for being here. Thank you for playing.

And to alter the words of a certain scientist...

You've changed my life, everyone. I'd like to think it was for the better.

I don't know whats going to happen to us once this blog is done for good, but I know I'll never forget you. I hope you won't forget me.

Well...This is where I get off.

Goodbye, Readers!

[writerghoul]

Like I was all in a dream

This fic is 1087 words of fluff with a small panic attack and focuses around SwissAlps.

It was inspired by an ask @hypnoneghoul got (Found Here). Specifically the idea of Swiss being a runt and Mountain reminding him of his pack, of his home. It takes place during the first year of his summoning, showing some of the smaller things between them.

I hope you like this little ramble and I might post it to AO3 <3.

The title for this fic comes from Drag Talks song The Void

He'll always admit he was the runt of his pack, the smallest in a group of absolute units. It was never something he ever felt bad about, even in childhood. The pack joked about it, sure, but it was never out of malice intent. It's the reason he has the playful demeanour he has. Perhaps that is the reason he felt instantly attracted to Mountain. The earth ghoul was the first he seen when he clawed his way out of the pit, the one who stood out in the group of average sized ghouls. He was a reminder of home. Swiss remembers seeing the way Mountain had to look down on him, the way he seemed to track each movement the multi-ghoul made. It was never fear he felt as his body twitched under his gaze. It was calmness. Relaxation that he'll have something familiar, even if it's not actually someone from his pack in the pit.

At first it had seemed Mountain tried to avoid him. When he woke up the earth ghoul would be no where to be found, the multi unable to hide his disappointment. That emotion changed when he was given a tour and informed that he spends most of the day around the ministry, helping with the tasks most siblings can't do themselves. Swiss' lips quirked as he heard, and seen, that. He knew that he would be a good mate, strong provider, mind still thinking in pit terms. It could be excused, after all he was a new summon. A voice was calling for him to find when he woke up, to join him before the rest of the ministry was awake. It was hit or miss at first his body needed the rest, jet-lag would be the word to use, sleeping through most of the day. Then practice started.

He knew he would have to learn instruments, learn to sing even, it was one of the first things he was told. His tail twitched in an panicked motion, choppy, as he stood on the mock platform. He rested his hand against the mic, mouth opening only for nothing to come out. The breath caught in his throat the moment he tried to sing, nothing but a croak coming out. Swiss' face heated up, eyes flicked around the room and hands shook. He needed out, body moved on instinct to make that happen. Unaware of footsteps following he found a alcove to hide it. It reminded him of the pits with small areas to hide in when being hunted, or having a panic attack. He curled in on himself as he started to cry, chest heaved as his breathing stuttered. It hurt. A large hand rested on his shoulder, rough voice speaking in ghoulish. "Are you okay?"

Swiss turned his head, an attempt to hide his tear streaked skin. "I'm fine." Anything to convince the earth ghoul he was okay, that he didn't need help. The ghoul didn't listen though. He heard the click of his tongue and his body being lifted into the air. His tail curled around his own thigh on instinct, head shifted as he felt himself placed on a large lap. Mountain just sat in silence, arms wrapped around the smaller ghoul. His hand rubbed against his back. It stayed like this until his breathing evened out and the earth ghoul ventured out to ask. "Better?"

His head moved, up and down. He didn't trust his voice yet, not wanting to cry again. Swiss swallowed, throat clicking, trying to catch his thoughts. The multi-ghoul drew in another breath, eyes closed as he speaks. "I just… froze. I couldn't sing, couldn't speak.." A bitter laugh left him as he looked at the giant, tail tightened around his thigh. His hand moved to rub at the spade, a habit he never kicked.

"I could tell." The earth ghoul responded, hand still rubbing at his back. They were waiting, for what? They couldn't tell. Swiss dipped his head down, shifting in his arms. His feet his the ground after a while, knees cracked as he stood. It was time to head back, to face what had happened.

No one said anything to him or about him. The next time he tried to sing, he focused on Mountain's energy. It helped him calm down, clear voice carried through the mic as he sung in front of the group. His lips quirked into a smile as he moved his body so he could look at the unit of a ghoul. He would be relaxed through the rest of the practice, tail and body swaying to the songs they were learning. When the practice finished he sat on the edge of the platform, feet kicked as he talked to the others.

The day after there was a free day for all of them. Typically Swiss would sleep in, this day he had other plans though. He woke up with the sun, stretching as he padded into the kitchen. His lips twitched at the corners as he smelt the cooking of the earth ghoul, tail flicked. He swallowed to wet his throat before speaking. "Mornin' Mount'."

"Swiss." It's the only acknowledgement he'll get from Mountain at the moment. He hummed a small tune as he began to make Mountain's tea. His tail flicked as he moved around the kitchen, helping him out before he moved to hand it to the earth ghoul. A smile planted itself on his lips as he moved to make himself coffee. He watched the earth ghoul plate the food for both of them. They ate in silence while they properly woke up, Swiss stole glances at him.

"Why do you keep looking at me?" The question left the earth ghoul before he could properly register it. His tail curling around his large thigh, nerves showing themselves.

"You remind me of home Everest." Swiss hummed out. His smile grew as he seen the tension dissipate. "I was the runt of my pack, they were as large as you are."

A chuckle left him seeing the gentle giant blush. He placed his mug on the counter as he swallowed, thoughts stuck on kissing the ghoul. His hands reached to set his mug down, eyes flicked from Mountain's eyes to his lips. "Can I?"

"Please."

How could he deny the sweet giant. Swiss stood on his toes, panting his hands on either side of his face. He drug him down, chapped lips meeting soft ones. It was the moon kissing the trees.

[jisungsbff01]

.like i need you.5.

...pairing…Chan x reader

...w.c... 2.3k

...genre…slice-of-life, college au!

...warnings…anxiety attack, mentions of not eating, insomnia

...characters...Y/N, (OC) Lilith, (OC) June, Chan, Jisung, Hyunjin(rest of members mentioned)

...synopsis...No one ever really knows what they wanna do in their 20s, but Y/N has always known what she was going to do. So, she began the journey to her dream and is so close to reaching it with no distractions at all. Until she is thrown into a project with Hyunjin, a fellow senior in college, and he introduces her to a few of his friends...connecting with one in particular...

Her whole plan is soon thrown off the track she’s had it on for 21 years….

A/N: I haven’t properly edited this chapter yet, but I wanted to get something out.

 Now that our regular class finals were over, Hyunjin and I were working overtime for the day we had left for our project. We were so close to getting where we needed it to be for his presentation of it and I was getting antsy. Currently, I was holed up in the producing studio I knew that later he would be at the dance studio across town. And, if I am being honest, I haven’t spoken to anyone in almost two days. Not even Hyunjin to discuss the project, granted he was too busy perfecting his routine to notice. In turn, this meant that I haven’t properly eaten… I had no one to drag me for coffee and something to eat and I have been too wrapped up in either the studio or my room on my computer to notice anything else. 

My phone has long been put on Do Not Disturd and I was finally getting somewhere with the background vocals. I’ve never been this picky with my songs, but I think since the main music part is mostly just me, I am overthinking it. I’ve never had to do main vocals and I am by far the best singer there is, but in the end had to for this so I’m kind of stuck with it. 

Although it was on Do Not Disturb, my phone would still occasionally light up with various notifications, and the last time it did, it was 5AM. My body was aching and I was having a hard time keeping my eyes open. I knew I was not going to be able to continue on properly with being as tired as I was and I hadn’t slept in over 24 hours and a little nap wouldn’t hurt. I set an alarm on my phone for 45 minutes and rolled up my hoodie as a make-shift pillow and I rested my head on it and let sleep take me in it’s comforting embrace.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

I was awoken by someone’s hand on my shoulder, calling my name. It was Han Jisung. How the hell did he get in here? I shoot up straight and look around, slightly confused as to where I was…but it all floods back rather quickly, “Ji? What are you doing here?”

He meekly brushed a few strands of hair out of my face as he responded, “I was getting a studio for Chris and I before he got here and the receptionist asked me to check in on the person in here because they’ve been in here since yesterday morning…have you eaten anything, Y/N?”

I stretch widely and got up, back to my seat at the desk and shake my head, “Too busy. I’m okay, though- thank you for checking on me I probably needed to wake up soon anyway-wait…what time is it?” My body panics slightly.

Jisung looks down at his watch and responds, “It’s 6:30, why?”

“Shit, I was supposed to be awake an hour ago…it’s okay, Ji. Again, thank you, but I have to get back to work. But, please tell the receptionist I’m okay.” I dismiss him rather quickly.

He mutters something as he walks out hesitantly. 

I continue to work, going in and out of the recording booth…deleting and rerecording clips here and there, adjusting the bass and trebel, the balance between vocals and instrumentals, going back through the whole song until I was satisfied. Which eventually happened. Only, it was 8:45 by the time that happened. But, finally I was done…and it was basically a whole new song, for the most part. I knew by this time Hyunjin would be at the dance studio, so I decided to head straight there.

Picking up is favorite drink along the way, which the shop owner decided to give me for free this morning for some reason, I made it to the studio by 9 exactly. I quietly made my way into the building, trying not to disrupt anyone and found Hyunjin stretching to soft music. The temperature outside left a bite of cold in the air in the studio, but I’m sure once he got moving he would be grateful for the temperature. 

I mumbled a ‘good morning’ to my friend as I handed him his drink and I sat on the couch, legs folded under me. The tall man went from being on the floor to towering over me in a heartbeat. 

“So I got a call from Jisung this morning…” he started off.

“Oh, yeah? Saw him this morning briefly, one of the few people who have woken me up that haven’t gotten their eyes clawed out, by the way.” I respond with a gravelly voice.

“Mhm, he told me that you haven’t been out of the studio in almost 24 hours?” He states frustratedly. 

“Yes, I got caught up, what’s the big deal, Hyun?”

“The big deal is that you haven’t eaten either, Y/N…you need to eat, and sleep.”

“Don’t worry, I grabbed a snack on my way here, ate it already…mom.” I mumble the last part, because I felt like I was being scolded by my mom.

“Okay, well you probably didn’t eat enough, so what is going to happen is you are going to take a nap here so I know you are actually sleeping and once you are awake, we are going to get you some real food.” 

“I’m not gonna say no to sleep right now, that’s for sure.” 

He tosses me his hoodie and I opt to use that as a blanket, once again, I fall asleep rather quickly and stay that way, even over the music and the dancing in the background. You would think the sounds would keep me from falling asleep, normally they probably would, but in the moment, they lull me to sleep instead. 

I only wake up once and it was when Felix and Chris stopped by, Chris had a blanket in hand and was more than ready to swap out Hyunjin’s hoodie for a proper blanket. He sat next to me, just above my head…and for some reason, I rested my head on his thigh. He stilled for a moment, before relaxing and laying his hand on my arm. I couldn’t help but fall asleep once again. 

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

I wake up from the feeling of strong nausea. And an extremely tight chest…

I shoot up from my position on the couch, interrupting whatever conversation everyone was having, and darting to the bathroom. Nothing came up, but I sat there dry heaving for a while. I’ve always hated getting sick in this way, I always felt helpless and no matter what, I always wanted my mom. I suddenly started crying, I felt like shit, hungry but too nauseous to eat. 

My blood sugar was definitely low and my mental health was now taking a drop. And I realize how hard it was getting to breathe.My breaths come out in sporadic huffs as I try to catch my breath just so I could begin to take slow breaths, to calm myself down. I didn’t want anyone to see me like this, especially not Chris. With shaky hands I message Hyunjin, asking him to come into the bathroom.

Within a couple of minutes, he’s running into the enclosed space. My hair, once pulled up into a bun, was now hanging in the hair tie by my shoulders. It was hot, too hot and I felt like I was going to throw up, even though I knew I couldn’t. He took a hair tie off his wrist and pulls my hair up, my head lulls back as he does so and he grabs my hand and sets it over his heart. There’s a loud roaring in my ears and I can hardly hear what he is saying but by the gesture, I understand that he is attempting to get me to breathe at the rate he was.

Suddenly he grabs his phone and dials someone, I still can’t hear him and I am at the point where I genuinely feel like I’m dying. My chest hurts, my throat hurts, and my lungs are beginning to ache from lack of proper oxygen. I see Hyunjin stand up and pull away to wet his hands under the faucet, coming back to put cool water on my forehead and the base of my neck. Out of the corner of my eye I see movement, but am unable to focus…or even care. Hyunjin goes out of view and Chris comes into view, my hand is pulled to his chest and his heartbeat is more noticeable than Hyun’s. He grabs my face so that I am looking at him in the eye and I begin to faintly hear him,” In, out, in out.”

He keeps a steady tempo to it as he continues to instruct my breathing and he hesitates to ask, “Would it be better if I hugged you?”  

I nodded, knowing that deep pressure has helped with attacks like this in the past for me, and once he wraps his arms around me, I am able to relax. My breathing doesn’t let up right away, and I am a little more aware my my surroundings, but I am able to request that he hug me tighter. I sigh out in relief once he gives me what I ask and I rest my head on his shoulder, noticing that Hyunjin had left. 

Once I calm down a bit more, he asks if I need a minute alone. I nod my head in response, needing to wet the cotton-mouth I have going on. He lets me know he was just going to be back in the studio whenever I was ready to come back. I rinsed out my mouth and walked out the door anyway, wiping the tears that gathered in my eyes. As I entered the dance studio, I noticed we had a few more additions to our little gathering. Everyone was here at this point, I made eye-contact with Chris as everyone still socialized amongst each other and signaled for him to come outside the door. I saw him grab my bag and say something to Hyunjin before following me out.

 He made sure the door closed behind him as I spoke, “I think I’m gonna head home, I’m just not feeling it.”

He watched me closely before taking a deep breath through his nose, “Not feeling it, or not feeling good?”

“Both?” I stated, unsure.

“Have you eaten anything?” He asked, knowing the answer already.

“No.”

“Let’s eat before you go home.”

“Chris, I’m not really-” “No, for my peace of mind, I need to see you eat something. Jisung told me how he found you and that you hadn’t eaten. You need to eat, even if it’s something small.”

I think about it before giving in and he’s driving us to a local cafe. 

Chris and I sat and ate for about an hour before he took me back to my apartment, walking me up. 

I felt the warmth of his body following behind me, guarding me…like I’m going to run at the first possible moment. I knew he was worried about me, he was the only one who really hid it well around me. And the past few weeks we’ve grown closer, we’ve gotten each other to open up and have even spoken countless times through text and over the phone. It was in this moment I truly felt feelings friends aren’t supposed to have for each other. I wanted nothing but him in my life. In this moment everything was quiet with him, the stress was gone when I was with him. I was happy and safe when I was with him. 

With him, everything was perfect.

I pulled my keys out of the pocket of my coat, in doing so my bag slid off my shoulder. He caught it, slipping it off my arm so that he could hold it. Before I could turn the knob to open the door, he softly grasped my upper arm, “Y/N, wait…”

My head cocks slightly to the side, “What’s wrong? Are you okay?”

He looked like he was in pain, like, physical pain. I grab his hand off my arm, my fingers knotting with his and let out a hum in questioning, asking for an answer. He nods his head and whispers, “Yeah, I’m okay, I just…”

He suddenly pulled me closer to him, still speaking in a low voice, “Tell me if you don’t want this.”

“Want wha”

He kissed me, and it took a heartbeat for me to completely wrap my head around it and reciprocate but once I did oh. I parted my lips, asking…begging for more. I hear my bag drop to the ground as he brings one hand up my body to rest on my hip, the other on my jaw, the tips of his fingers curling in my hair. I pulled him closer by his waist, wanting our bodies welded together at this point. I take a chance and nibble on his lower lips, earning a groan from deep in his throat. My body filled with heat and I wanted more. But I didn’t get more. He pulled away, his body tense and shaking slightly. 

“Yeah, I’m okay, pretty girl.” He said to me, still holding me close to his body. For a few moments, we stayed like that. Until he pressed a few more light kisses to my lips, then my right cheek, left cheek, forehead,nose, jaw, and finally to my neck. I gasped from the sensation, my body still humming. 

He actually pulled away this time, leading my body back and handed my bag back to me, turning the knob that I had barely gotten a chance to unlock before he kissed me. He turned my body, pressed a chaste kiss on the crown of my head before leading me in my shared apartment.”I will see you later, pretty girl. Get some sleep, yeah?”

I nodded, pressing my lips into a fine line, closing the door as he walked away.

------------------

Thank you for reading, let me know what you thought!

[7grandmel]

Todays rip: 19/04/2024

i love(d) you

Season 6 Featured on: SiIvaGunner's Highest Quality Rips: Volume FF Also on: Now That's What I Call Quality! 3

Ripped by vvsvlogs

Requested by oetaboy and an anonymous reader! @oetaboy (Ask Box)

I'm sure this rip's been a long time coming for many - I know it has for me. I've had i love(d) you sitting in my drafts as far back as in March, but truthfully it's...daunting, to write about. Requested by two readers. Close to 200 thousand views on YouTube, and recently featured prominently in popular Clone Hero YouTuber Acai's "The Quality of SiIvaGunner" series. And the rip itself being an emotional gutpunch in a season filled with them, from a ripper who's already gutpunched me plenty with Wham! Into Dreams and The Paragoomba and the Wiggler. vvsvlogs, Vivi, I ask this with the most sincere gratitude possible - why must you do this to me?

Minecraft as a game has its emotional hooks in at least two generations of people - that much I think we're all aware of. A sandbox filled with endless possibilities, community, friends, individual stories of survival or of great creative endeavors, all wrapped in C418's hauntingly beautiful score, one I've discussed many times before with Fell From a High Place (Reprise), M-O-O-G City and Every Mob Wants To Rule My World. All of these rips are beautiful, yet they're all aiming to play with Minecraft's sound in some way - the former two rips are arrangement of its music with other games' instrumentation, and the latter rip is a melodyswap playing Everybody Wants To Rule The World. They all play on my senses in their own ways, they're all rightfully impressive - but nothing hits quite the same as Minecraft's own music, on its own terms. i love(d) you isn't aiming to impress or amaze - but it lands a full-on critical hit on one's heart through leveraging everything that's kept Subwoofer Lullaby alive for so many years.

I've talked plenty about my musical illiteracy, and so I hope it doesn't come as a surprise that I've never really listened to world-renowed singer Billie Eilish. She's been on the radio, I've heard Bad Guy, but it was never a name I gave much more thought beyond seeing her discussed online from time to time. You can imagine the absolute awe I was in when I clicked on i love(d) you when it first went up, already expecting an emotional hit due to the Minecraft song used, only to get goosebumps from Eilish's vocals alone. i love you is the penultimate song from Eilish's debut studio album, the very same that Bad Guy was featured on - yet compared to that track's bass-heavy, almost seductive energy, i love you feels remarkably personal, with little more than an acoustic guitar and piano accompanying the openly emotional vocal performance. It's sincere in a way I don't hear enough music be, as if a diary translated into song, much the same emotion that Because I Love You conveyed yet with even greater magnitude due to the vocals in play.

i love(d) you, uploaded for 2022's valentines day, wields both of these forms of love - the connections many of us have to one of the most impactful games ever made, and the unfiltered emotion of i love you - to create something unabashedly beautiful. Mashups aren't a novel concept, mashups are nothing new - yet one glance at the comments tells me that I'm not alone in finding this rip in particular to have struck an incredibly sensitive nerve. Because there's a beauty to Minecraft that I think many of us oft forget about. It's a game that we all cherish, yet also one that's very easy to have left behind: we have adult responsibilities, we have school, we have other, shorter, more concise games, we have social media, we have friends, we have blogs...the solemn beauty of playing the game itself is, for many viewers like myself, not much more than a memory, something that can feel ever so difficult to recreate without feeling as if something's wrong.

We...I'm...not a kid anymore.

There was nothing about i love(d) you's concept that necessitated it to be more than just the mashup. There rip had no need for visuals that'd help convey the edit like with Plantasia 2 or Luna, mi Amor, no need to tickle the funnybone like with SUNGORE or the hundreds of other YTPMV rips on the channel. Yet, halfway through the rip, to the tune of Eilish's soothingly reverberating vocals, the background begins to change, not to a bit, not to a reference nor easter egg...but to Minecraft. To where all of this attachment began - to a far-off view of the game's beautiful landscapes as the sun begins to rises. That digital world that looks different for every player, yet the same in everyone's hearts - that place that, no matter how many years pass, how long its been since we last played, we all love. Its impact different to everyone, yet the feeling unanimous. It drives home how well the mashup works not just as a mixture of two deeply emotional songs, but as music tied to a shared experience: all of our Minecraft worlds looked different, all of our personal lives look different, but we've all played the game, and we've all had affection for it.

Every moment I spend thinking about this rip aches in some way. It's been well past two years since it was first uploaded, yet it continues to follow me as the years go on, my mouse drawn to it any time it reappears in my recommendations. In being featured on 2024's Now That's What I Call Quality! 3, I think the team holds much the same sentiment - even as the months pass, i love(d) you is the kind of rip that'll never fall out of favor, never stop meaning things to people. And realizing that it was made by vvsvlogs, the very same vvsvlogs who's already made me far too emotionally vulnerable on here twice before, has only made it mean that extra bit more to me.

I'm not a kid anymore. I know that. But I'll always be grateful to SiIvaGunner, the people behind it, and those who follow it along with me, for being able to bring me back to that state of mind when I least expect it.

Thank you.

[atiny-for-life]

Golden Hour feels different and I think I know why...

This album feels a lot less cohesive than all others they've ever released. I'm by no means saying it's bad or you shouldn't enjoy it or support the comeback, but it's still something noteworthy.

They said they were really happy making this album, which is amazing and I'm glad they've been enjoying all the new opportunities they've been getting, but when I listen to most of these songs, I feel like we' we've been given a folder from the producer's computer with all the leftover/unfinished tracks, and I think I may know why that is.

First, I wanna say what I mean by the album being less cohesive: Ateez are big on concept albums. The songs tell a story, they're connected, both conceptiually and lyrically, even as we switch genres. Look to the Fever and World Series where you can track the themes even without knowing about their storyline.

Ateez are also famous for their cinematic songs - Inception, Answer, Guerrilla, Halazia - the instrumentals are layered, interwoven, it feels like you're on a journey as you listen to it. You start in one place and don't know where you're headed until you get there. They're full of unique instruments, random noises, hidden harmonies from Maddox and the vocal line. It's art.

And now move on to Blind, Work, Shaboom, and it's one beat in the back that switches up as we move along but there's nothing new to notice on repeat listens, nothing remarkable to pick out. Wooyoung summed it up as "easy listening" in their KStar Next Door interview. Lyrically, Work is also a lot more repetitive which is something Ateez historically stayed clear of because Mingi and Hongjoong especially are very invested in the writing process and want the songs to have meaning.

Proving my point, they mentioned during the Preview Live that Mingi and Hongjoong worked more on Empty Box and Siren, with Siren even being a contender for the title track and Empty Box being their collective favorite and, hey, look at that, those two are the only songs on the album which are a lot more complex on all fronts, a lot more similar to their usual approach to music.

Looking at the bigger picture, I absolutely don't think it was laziness which led to the slight drop in quality. I think KQ just has a pre-planned release schedule where everything is organized so they can squeeze in comeback promotions between tour schedules and, this time, they had to find a way to squeeze in Coachella, which is an opportunity you simply cannot turn down and they made a judgment call and decided to take preparation time away from the album.

Regardless of how Ateez felt about this, they worked their asses off, and while they're already in the US, they attend interviews, take extra classes, film the music video etc. and thus, weeks of album preparations are now spent on Coachella-related schedules. As a result, there ultimately just wasn't enough time to hole up in the studio as much as they normally would've which, as a performer, must be a whole lot more fun, but isn't so great when you're just a listener.

The Edenary team is still responsible for most of the songs, of course, but they're now also working for Xikers which is likely possible because Hongjoong now has years of experience under his belt and can compose full songs or add finishing touches himself whenever needed while also working on Xikers' music on occasion - we've seen him credited multiple times.

On top of that, they also used a live band at Coachella, meaning their songs had to be translated to acoustic which was most likely fully Edenary's doing and also took them away from preparing for this comeback.

These days, their albums aren't as pre-prepared anymore as they used to be a couple of years ago when we still got song teasers at the end of tracks several comebacks in advance. They've caught up by now, as we've been able to see in behind the scenes footage of Hongjoong in the studio and from his interview with Changkyun from Monsta X (I.M on the Beat) where he largely talked about working on The World - Ep Fin. which was clearly still fresh in his mind.

Normally, this wouldn't be a downside at all, but it does make scheduling conflicts like this something to be cautious about, especially looking back to how exhausted they (and most other K-pop artists) always are between December and February every single year when all the award shows come together.

Whether I'm right or not, I don't know and can't prove, but I think it makes a lotta sense and would explain some things. Either way, watching them perform Work is still fun and it's lovely to see them so happy and thriving, but I do think there'll be a noticable difference when the next album drops without any surprise schedules throwing things off course.

[nayeonline]

"LW2G" - The Debut EP by KATSEYE (my reimagining of their debut)

So this is actually the second imagined album I've put together, which feels weird to nobody but me, because despite only posting one for ITZY literally a whole year ago, at all times I have at least 5 half finished imagined albums in my drafts lmao. This one is for KATSEYE, because if you've seen my rants reviews in my Monthly Roundup series (here & here) you will know that I have not been exactly pleased with the direction HYBE is taking them. I am aware that the group's debut EP 'SIS' is dropping soon, so I wanted to post this now so my opinions wouldn't be overly influenced by what the group has already released.  ALSO - a lot of this post was talked through and contributed to by my moot @pocima so thanks so much for that bestie u have amazing taste :) Before we get into the tracklist, let’s lay out what I wanted to achieve from this project:

It should have a clear, defined target audience.

The EP should establish a sound that doesn’t echo someone else currently releasing music aimed at that target audience.

The sound created should allow them room to grow and explore.

The EP should be somewhat thematically relevant to their status as rookies and their big aspirations.

Their concept should emphasize their status as a truly international group and capitalize on that.

So with that out of the way, let's get into “LW2G”, my imagined KATSEYE debut project.

Target Audience:

Because of the ages of the members, and because the music promotion vessel of choice these past few years has been TikTok, older teenagers seem the most obvious target audience for a group like KATSEYE in my opinion.

Concept:

The concept will be semi inspired by the somewhat new yet already iconic ‘superhero by night, ordinary girl by day’ trope popularised by Sailor Moon, Hannah Montana, etc. High school is a pretty universal experience and will link KATSEYE with girls around the world, so half of the concept will build on this - perhaps there could be concept photos of the girls wearing typical school uniforms from their region? This would also expand upon the aesthetics of ‘Dream Academy’. The other half will draw from classic 90s girl group aesthetics, think TLC or Destiny’s Child music videos. The combination of relatability and aspiration works well for a 2024 market in my opinion - it's what gives stars like Taylor Swift longevity over their competitors. The concept also feels very kpop in my opinion, which is also supposed to be what sets KATSEYE apart from their competitors.

Sound:

The sound will build off the concept throughout the tracklist. The marching band instrumentation references a high school ambience, but the 00s synths echo the superstar energy I’m trying to create in the second half of the concept. Key reference points for the sound will be Nelly Furtado, TLC, and Destiny’s Child.

Tracklist:

(1) Step On Up (orig. Ariana Grande)

I wanted to start with this cult favourite of Ariana Grande's discography. I love how the percussion plays with the vocal performance, it effortlessly builds the excitement for the album, references the marching bands of the concept, and it's thematically relevant to the groups status as rookies. I truly believe the KATSEYE girls could handle this song effortlessly.

(2) Long Way 2 Go (orig. Cassie)

This is the track that I envision being the title track, ITS SO ADDICTIVE. I would definitely change the lyrics to suit the girls being younger, and I would love to see a variety of languages in this track - they might be an international group but if they only sing in English they are functionally another american pop group. This also works well thematically for KATSEYE, and the synths echo their 'pop superstar by night' concept.

(3) Lose My Breath (orig. Destiny's Child)

This has the potential to be another promoted track that I could see expanding on the high school it girl aspect of their concept, due to it's gorgeous percussion. This is such a classically amazing dance track and we know that these girls can DANCE, so I know they would kill a choreography to it.

(4) Change (orig. FLO)

Thanks to @pocima again for suggesting this track specifically, it really pulls the album together and brings that relatability that perhaps some of the other songs were lacking. FLO have such an amazing discography, but this track especially would work well with the girls' vocal styles in my opinion. Its on the more rnb side, creating another avenue of music for the group to explore in future projects without alienating their main sound. I could also see this as a secondary single from the EP, functioning as the kind of mirror image to LW2G.

(5) Better (orig. BoA)

An absolute banger from the queen of kpop, and it works so well on this EP. It has this aura that I really think the KATSEYE girls could pull off. It has the beautiful 00s/90s synths we love and the anthemic nature of the song fits the girl group style effortlessly.

(6) Soul (orig. Girls' Generation)

I love this track for the closer because it brings together all the different elements of the EP - it has the percussion of Lose My Breath and Step On Up, the synths of LW2G, the assertiveness of Better and the vocals of Change. Again, I don't know that it would only be in Korean - i would love to see some of the other languages the girls speak featuring on this track. Like many of the tracks on this album, the concept of 'finding your soul' also speaks to the position KATSEYE is in within the industry, and successfully rounds out the overall message of the EP - KATSEYE are here to rock the boat and find out who they are along the way.

Final Thoughts:

I really like the EP I've put together here, and I truly think it fills a gap in the market - it's really not a bad idea to pitch a new girl group at america considering its been a long time since a group act has really made it big over there, and KATSEYE certainly have what it takes talent-wise. I may not have liked the two singles KATSEYE have dropped so far, but I am certainly sat for their official EP whenever it comes out. By all means let me know ur thoughts on my tracklist and concept ideas, and thanks for reading, I appreciate it a lot.

~ ari

[dramatisperscnae]

[my muse was unexpectedly kidnapped, found a year later barely alive, injured, and bound.]

@lazaruspitreborn

Where there would be some snarky commentary there was silence and cautiousness when Red Hood found frigging Nightwing dumped inside what he could only consider a murder shack at the outskirts of Gotham. A scene so shocking he couldn't even bring any words out of his mouth or brain. No, he scanned the place a second and third time with his scan-bug (one of his latest creations) and upon not finding anything that called for extra caution, rushed to Dick. They never stopped looking for him. Never! They lost Bruce too soon, couldn't lose Dick as well! But as the days went on, hope dwindled in spite of the Babs', Tim's and Jason's efforts. And with criminal activity rising again, their time became more and more limited, only making their search even harder. "H-Hey, hey, hey! It's fine. It's me, Bluebird." Jason's voice was hushed and way softer when he stopped what he thought was an attempt on a punch. "Holy shit! You're alive... Dick! Dick, no, no, no! Do not fucking go dead on me!" Gods! Jason slided on his knees to take a better look at Dick, craddling his head and face against his own chest while he measure his pulse - weak, but still there. "I'm here. I'm here Dick. You're safe." A wave of relief washed over him, so powerful that Jason completely forgot to send word back to the Belfry for quite a few minutes while he checked Dick's wounds and ascertained himself that he didn't have anything broken.

Cold. So cold. What was left of his suit wasn't nearly enough to keep the cold out. Wrists hurt. Ankles. Everything, just one constant dull ache. Where was he? Had they moved him again? They kept moving him, never too long in one place, never more than a few days…weeks? He didn't know. Time had stopped meaning anything a while back. Impossible to tell time without clocks. Without light. Without anything to go by. He could only guess.

How long had he been gone? Weeks? Months? How long since they'd taken him? How long until they came back? They always came back. Every time he though it was over, every time he woke up on a new chair, a new floor, every time he thought he'd made it out, they always came back. What would it be this time? Gas? Injection? Or going old-school with blades and blunt instruments? Or a combination of them all?

Breath rasped in his chest, the sound of hurried footsteps making him twitch. Here it came, all over again, and he didn't have the strength to fight them off. He barely had the strength to struggle against the hands pulling him from the floor, trying to pull away until his arms were immobilized and a hushed voice spoke.

It's me, Bluebird.

He looked up to see a red mask, featureless but for white lenses, looking back at him. Talking to him. Red. Not white. They didn't use red masks. And their masks didn't look like this, not remotely. It wasn't them. It wasn't them. He sagged, what little energy that had been driving him flowing out as his eyes slid closed again.

And then he heard his name. His real name. And he was being lifted, cradled against a broad chest. Forcing his eyes open again he looked up, hazily, at the red mask - no. Red helmet - above him. A helmet he knew. Voice he knew. Assuring him. Safe. He's safe. Bluebird. "…Jason…" His voice was weak, barely a whisper, hoarse from overuse or underuse or some unholy combination of both; as dry as his mouth felt, he was surprised he could speak at all right now.

There was nothing broken - at least, not recently, though from the looks of things at least one or two fingers had been broken and forcibly reset a few times. Around his wrists and ankles his struggles against his bonds had left clear tracks in the flesh beneath that had never gotten a chance to heal, while beneath the shreds of what had once been his suit were scars - some fresh, some months old, none of them clean or pretty - scattered amongst bruises and fresh wounds while his arms bore the tell-tale marks of needles. IV, syringes, his captors had regularly introduced various things into his system, though whether to keep him alive or to torment him further - or both - was anyone's guess.

[presleyheart]

https://open.spotify.com/track/19IEpm6mKchqoetomtig3e?si=1d405a3e2f294f95 -- song correlation "Daddy's here.." !! Pairing 70s!Austin!Elvis and Gender Neutral!Reader !! SUMMARY ---- The reader joins Elvis during one of his rehearsals at the International Hotel. The loud noise hurts the reader's ears, and they involuntarily go nonverbal. Elvis, having no clue they were little, stops the rehearsal early once he realizes reader has gone backstage to avoid the noise. Realizing almost too late, he has to rush to comfort the now regressed reader. TW ---- Light swearing, mentions of anxiety, panic attack??

Genre: Agere Fluff ☁

You had been having that fuzzy feeling in your mind the entirety of the day. Each minute felt suffocating to you. You needed to be big for Elvis. You were worried being little would ruin everything about his plans.

You had been doing so much travelling.

Too much travelling.

Everything was whirring around your head at such a fast pace. This is how it's felt since the 68 comeback. It's been 2 years since and Elvis was still at lightning pace.

He's been extra busy recently and you have been miserable without having a chance to be little. He hasn't really picked up on it due to him being stressed, and you'd hate to stress him out more. ----

-------------

---- You walked onto the stage as you watched Elvis holding his microphone. The light was bouncing off of his tan skin beautifully. He looked perfect from head to toe.

You watched in awe, he smiled as soon as he saw you.

"There's my baby.. c'mere" He said, the smile and gleam in his eyes from seeing you never leaving.

"You only saw me minutes ago?" You said, giggling towards his affection. Maybe this'll distract your inner true motives? Or so you thought.

He pulled you into his strong arms. He hugged you close, as he pressed a kiss against your head "I would be with you all the time if I could." He muttered.

You felt so small with him in this moment, but you couldn't slip. You reluctantly pulled away from his warm hold. Even though you desired to be comforted in the time being, you couldn't risk slipping.

"I know, go have fun, okay?" You said, flashing a small forced smile and squeezing his hand.

"Anything for you.." He responded once more. He went on his merry way with his friends.

If only he knew what was brewing inside of your head.

----

-------------

----

You sat down on stage off to the side, not minding everything as you rested your head against the cool wall.

"I uh, I wanna try something new... a'ight Glen?" Elvis muttered into the mic. He wandered around til' he met with his friend on the piano, in which he gracefully moved his hand around to imitate the rhythm he wanted. "You're gonna take the intro here"

As soon as Elvis began moving his hand and made a bunch of 'bum' and 'duh' sounds, the piano riff started. He immediately got into it.

You found yourself biting your bottom lip softly. Getting antsy as the song started. Already, the piano was loud.

Each instrument one after the other, which almost caused a sensory overload from the sound. You felt a pang in your heart. This was too much.

First the piano, then the drums, then the bass-

"Bring that bass up, Jerry... keep playin'." Elvis stated at one of his many band members. This knocked you away from trying to space out and avoid the noise. You were squirming in your spot. The room suddenly felt tighter.

Everyone was laughing and playing, everyone was enjoying this but you. Elvis seemed so happy. You couldn't ruin that.

All the people were having so much fun. Whooping, clapping, laughing. Elvis made his way around the room, now at the backup singers.

He finally began singing.

"That's all right," "That's all right!" "That's all right," "That's all right!"

It all just got louder and louder. You felt your heart rate speed up and tears were coming to your eyes. You held your head a moment.

"Boys?" "That's all right!" "With me?" "Anyway you do!"

Luckily it was during the instrumental. You crawled behind the curtains and got up. You were rushing backstage.

Your heart was pounding, your breath was fast, you found your way into a dressing room and sat down. Praying for your anxiety to fade away.

Normally you loved Elvis in concert. Right now, you couldn't bear to see him. You were too stressed out. Everything felt so overwhelming and your emotions were out of play.

'Elvis doesn't need this right now.' You convinced yourself. You could still hear the music, you were rocking in place. Every word anyone said felt like a dagger to your mind.

"Flames man.. flames are comin' offa that guitar..."

Right as Elvis was going into the brass section, he turned to give you a smile, but you weren't there. He looked nervous, immediately.

"Now boys, hang on." Elvis said. You heard the music stop. You sighed in relief. You couldn't speak. He called out your name, over and over.

Whoops of "Y/N".. Elvis was lightning speed as he made his way backstage. "Little one?" He called out, in distress. You held your knees to your chest as you heard his footsteps approaching the door to the dressing room you were in.

Elvis came in, practically breaking the door down.

"Aw, shit, babe- what's..." His heart drops. He immediately goes into daddy mode.

"Oh my.. my poor little one." He could see the tears and hyperventilating from you. Elvis went around the couch in seconds and held you in a tight embrace. All you could do was cuddle into him. "I am so sorry, little.. Daddy's here now."

The only word you can mutter out is..

"Scared.."

If Elvis' heart didn't break any moments before, it surely did now. He felt so guilty for not noticing.

"My sunshine shouldn't have to feel scared.. this ain't ever gonna happen again.. Daddy promises." He held you closely and sighed.

"You're too little to have to feel such big worries.. oh my baby.." His voice broke. He felt his heart shatter even worse as you clung to him and sobbed. He cradled you in the back of the head. He sighed.

Eventually your breathing calmed down and you practically fell asleep hugging Elvis. You were finally getting Daddy's attention.

----

-------------

----

"What the hell is takin' so long, E-?" Elvis' friend spat out, in the doorway 15 minutes later after this.

"Shh. I suggest you shut your pie-hole. I got company. Now get." Elvis responded, with a look that could kill. He felt bad for not being there, he was only now happy you were content. He would strangle his friend if they ruined it.

Elvis turned his gaze back to you and planted kisses on your head.

You were his baby. All he truly needed.

Daddy's here now... and that's all that matters.

[danger-xylophones]

ADHD (Thrawn x reader)

warnings: brief reference to sex, implied short reader, petnames (beloved, lover, my dear), it's disgustingly fluffy

I got diagnosed with ADHD a little over two months ago and wanted to write something with Thrawn

masterlist | chiss

There are times Thrawn doesn't understand you. And it's as baffling to him as it is amusing.

When he'd first met you, you were a freshly minted lieutenant assigned to the Chimeara through a stroke of good luck. A position as a data analyst opened up and Commodore Faro happened to know enough about you to vouch for your reassignment.

A quick good word with the young officer and here you were, nearly four years later, in the Grand Admiral's quarters pacing a track in the floor.

You did this fairly often, mostly when you thought you were alone, and Thrawn couldn't count how many times he'd walked into your shared room to find you talking to yourself as you wandered in circles around his furniture and various artworks.

He'd accepted it as a feature of being with you - a funny one, if he was honest. And it never really bothered him. Whenever he came home to find you pacing around, he'd carefully obstruct your path and pull you into a kiss. Normally you'd stop pacing after that and join him on his lounger where you'd talk about each other's day.

And without a doubt you'd talk about something odd that happened to you earlier which would inevitably lead you to think of some question to which you did not know the answer. And you'd probably ask him if he knew and if he didn't you'd go run and find your datapad to find the answer. Which would end with you throwing a lot of new information at him until he distracted you with the thought of food, sleep, or sex.

It was a routine you two had and one Thrawn greatly enjoyed. He thought you were a charming little thing with your flights of fancy and infinite capacity for new knowledge.

Your want to keep learning was a double-edged sword. You liked to learn but Thrawn had noticed a pattern with the information you gathered. You had an initial interest that quickly bled into an all-consuming infatuation with an idea. That singular focus could last months or a day before fading altogether wherein you'd find something else to focus on. A couple times, that new focus had been him. His culture, his language, his mind - you'd practically interrogate him for answers. He might've thought you obsessed had Thrawn not been witness to the pattern of your interests previously.

But he'd gotten used to the pattern and knew that when your focus turned to him, he had only to satisfy your curiosity by answering or to tell you he was tired of your questions and that he wanted to do something else.

And today was no different.

Thrawn had entered his quarters to find you pacing in his training room instead of his stateroom. You were talking to yourself as you held aloft one of Thrawn's electro-staffs at full extension.

A small voice warned Thrawn that you'd found a new 'hyperfixation' but he couldn't be certain if it was the staff, martial arts, his training droids, or him again.

Unfortunately, a case could be made for any of them since your last fixation was on a musical instrument from your home planet. He'd narrowly talked you out of buying one for yourself to learn how to play. While he wanted to encourage you in any pursuit, Thrawn knew that this fixation was fleeting and that once you had the instrument in your hands it would probably fade.

Thrawn watched as you carefully twirled the staff in your hands the way you'd seen him do a thousand times. That ruled out one of them - you weren't interested in the droids...this time.

Your pacing slowed as you tapped the staff on the ground close to your feet and made a small hum in the back of your throat.

With a shake of his head and an affectionate smile on his face, Thrawn stepped into his training room. "Beloved?" His voice echoed a little strangely in the training room and for a moment Thrawn wondered if it always sounded like that.

"Thrawn!" You cheered, retracting the staff to it's storage size. Without waiting a minute, you ran for him and jumped up to wrap your arms around his neck. The sudden addition of your weight knocked Thrawn off balance momentarily and he had to stagger back to keep both of you upright. But he was quick to find his balance again and wrapped his arms tight around your midsection. "I missed you." You mumbled in his ear.

"I missed you as well, lover." Pressing his lips to the side of your head, Thrawn indulged himself in the embrace. You held tighter to him in response. "I'll admit I'm surprised to find you in here. What were you doing?"

You retracted from his hold enough to look at him. "I wanted to look at the weapons you have in here. You didn't tell me you had electro-staffs."

Thrawn huffed a small laugh - melee weapons. Such an odd creature you are. "It never occurred to me that you would want to know that." He released his grip on you and let you slide down his body back to the floor. "Would you like me to demonstrate how to use them?"

"Are you just going to show off?" You raised an eyebrow at him and tucked the sheathed weapon close to your chest.

"Perhaps," Thrawn pursed his lips, "but you are aware that I only 'show off' for you, yes?"

Thrawn could see the heat bloom in the apples of your cheeks which brought a satisfied smirk to lips.

"I-I'm aware." You pouted a bit before brightening up. "Can we cuddle?"

"Cuddle?" Thrawn asked, raising an amused eyebrow at you. You nodded, clutching tight to the staff in your hands. Maybe he'd come to his conclusion too soon? Your fixation could be back on him. "Of course, lover, but you have to leave the staff here."

Your brow furrowed and as if suddenly becoming aware of the staff in your hands, you jumped and scampered off to put it back where you'd gotten it from. When you returned to the door, Thrawn held out a hand for you to take.

Your hand was light in his grasp but you held tight to him, fingers lacing with his own. Carefully Thrawn tugged you out of his training room and towards the stateroom only for you to suddenly screech to a halt. "Wait a minute!" You exclaimed. Thrawn, worried something was wrong, turned to you in an instant. "You didn't kiss me." You pouted at him and Thrawn felt his heart melt.

"No, I didn't." Thrawn agreed and before you could say anything else, he stooped down to press his lips to yours. It took you a second to respond but you eventually fell into him with a happy little hum Thrawn tucked away in his heart. Eventually, he pulled away. "Better?"

Humming again, you rolled your lips in to kiss your teeth before replying. "Much better, thank you."

"Of course." Thrawn mumbled, tugging on your hand to get you to follow him. He led you through his stateroom to your shared living quarters where a long chaise awaited both of you.

Without warning, you dropped his hand and bounded toward the bedroom. But, Thrawn didn't pay your sudden absence much mind and instead he settled into a comfortable position on the lounger, his datapad at the ready so he could catch up on the latest news in the greater artworld.

You came back shortly, your own datapad in hand and without waiting for an invitation, practically jumped on Thrawn's lap. A small puff of air slipped from him as he wrapped his arms around you to stabilize you and himself. But you just laughed quietly and looped an arm around his shoulder as you twisted to sit sideways on him. Your head tucked under his chin.

"Are you comfortable?" He asked, half-joking.

"Very." You replied, sinking more of your weight on him. "Is this ok?"

"Perfectly, lover." Thrawn hummed, running his hand down your side. You shivered at the slightly ticklish sensation which made Thrawn grin. But he didn't feel like teasing you right now.

You both fell into a comfortable silence only broken after a few minutes by you sighing and pressing a kiss to his neck. "I missed you."

"As you already said, my dear." Thrawn relied, pressing a kiss to your crown without looking away from the Nubian painting he'd just started examining.

"Oh."

He could just picture the slightly stunned expression on your face. "I missed you too, though." He amended, squeezing your hip.

"Hey, Thrawn?" You broke the silence again after a few minutes. He hummed to show he was listening. "What model are your training droids?"

"They are part of the DT-sentry droid series."

"Ah."

He could hear you typing something on your datapad. Him or martial arts? Or his droids?

"Thrawn?"

"Hmm?"

"Did you know that the BCA developed droids for the Separatists during the clone wars?" Droids it was.

"I did, actually." He replied in a pleasant tone. "Did you know that they were responsible for making the B2 Super battle droids?"

"They were?" Frantic typing followed your question and Thrawn waited for a follow-up from you. "Thrawn?"

"Yes, lover?"

"Why don't you use the KX-series?"

He had to think for a moment, of course he'd considered the KX-series before. "The DT's were a gift from the emperor. Otherwise, I would use the KX-series."

"That's what I thought. They seem more effective anyways." More typing and Thrawn kept his ears open for another question but it never came. Instead, you settled into a quiet contentment punctuated by bouts of typing and silence.

Eventually-

"Thrawn?"

"Yes?"

You pressed a kiss just under his jaw. "Thank you."

His brow furrowed. "For what?"

"For putting up with me." You said it so flippantly and Thrawn felt his heart pang.

"My beloved," Thrawn began, raising a hand to push your head back and chin up to look him in the eye, "I do not 'put up' with you. I enjoy your company. I enjoy your questions too." You blinked at him, shock evident on your face. "You bring me profound joy - never forget that." He leaned in, bringing you into a sound kiss that made Thrawn's heart flutter. When you broke apart, you were looking at him with a spellbound expression that made the chiss laugh inwardly. "I love you and all of your oddities."

[pidgefudge]

SO. i have listened to @gooboogy 's wonderful green album. and i wrote down my thoughts on each song. and now i am putting them here!!

"thoughts" being actually somewhat coherent comments that devolve into What Would This Be In A Video Game because this is me we're working with after all

and you reading this. yes you. go listen to it

verdant: oooough blorpy,,,, very cool i like. good beat it's quite foot tappable. also the name itself might be a new vocal stim. verdant. vvvverrrrrdant.

halls: much noises!! the instrumence in this scratch my brain in a good way. feels a bit like im 7 years old watchinf my brother play 2d mario stages and reimagining the music

agua: oooohh arpeggio action and a SICK beat. once again the Noises are lovely. big fan of all 3 so far but this one in particular methinks. however i have many more songs to go (!!)

doot doot: very fun i also like this one a lot :3 and coming to you from my one-track autistic mind: this album would be a fantastic game soundtrack

side note i know im writing less for some of these but thats bc im experiencing them in shapes and colors more than expressable words. trust me they're stirring the brain stew

going for a walk: i know the title is about a walk but im envisioning this as the soundtrack to a sort of road trip montage animation thing. specifically my road trip with family from san francisco to la. oh yes this ending is us finally getting to the hotel and me flopping onto the bed

forward: im liking the melody here a lot <33 this album is making me want to boot up lmms again and try my hand at original music,,, ive only ever attempted remixes (i tried to do aquarium park from sonic colors a few years ago and gave up but now i kinda wanna go back to it,,, i wonder if i was cooking) ok yes back to the actual song whoops this one is soo cool one of my faves so far

snag: i like these opening chords!! i dont know what you actually call them but the like. buildup parts?? you know?? those bits??? big fan OOH and a uh. build down (lol) bit too! also liking the sparkly chimey instrumence

blazen: OHHH YESSS this would be the theme for my favorite antagonist in the hypothetical game that i am apparently going to be referencing multiple times (dimentio and mr L came to mind immediately) absolutely jamming

beep boop: fuck yeah man it sure does OH SPOOKY NOTES OH OH COOL BEAT ASWELL i am in for a fun time this is. also the theme of my favorite antagonist. but the battle theme i think. oh hell yeah the orchestra hits. yes yes definitely battle theme. sorry for putting all these in a vgm context shfjdkfkssghf i just listen to a lot of it so thats how my brain parses instrumentals

hunt: strimgs :3 wohhh this is so cool. buzzy in a good way. golden brown triangles and other spiky shapes. that's kinda meaningless to anyone but me but. oh nice more Noises always love the Noises

overwhelm: theme for when i have a project due the next day and am swamped with other homework shdjdksfjdh

VERDANT!: once more with gusto!! loving the faster tempo. constellationy crystally instrument is particularly pleasing. oooughh so gooddddd

creepin': spacey!! im watching a crew set out in their little shuttle, oblivious to the horrors awaiting them on their station

envy: this is a boss fight that's emotionally heavy for the protagonists. perhaps fighting a former friend or mentor or team member

whomp whomp: quite a tricksy track!! some sort of haunted place,,,, maybe the place where the previous battle takes place. maybe it's actually a ghost (especially if the protagonist had some role in their death and feels crushing guilt) (bonus points if the ghost openly expresses resentment for the protag)

gromulous: the word ever. final boss' lair for sureee. yeah this song sure is gromulous. idk how else to describe it you hit the nail on the head

largemouth: oooh a bit silly but also cool guy. im thinking some sort of underground secret society/lab thing they have to infiltrate that's hiding a Sinister Secret (the big plot twist of the game) doesn't even have to physically be underground it could be a moon base situation. maybe i should just make this whole thing into a scifi space rpg

a way out: i can see this as the final boss music and as you get further in the fight it ramps up. i know i already assigned songs to the main antagonist but shhhhh. (or i can always pull a super paper mario in terms of antagonists)

under over: oh!! i love this one!! hometown theme. chill and familiar but still upbeat rather than sleepy. and it has a very strong nostalgia factor,,,,, in love with this song it might be my favorite. but there are still 3 more so!

float: this beginning is very cool im loving the vibe. dire dire docks but make it just after sunset and watch the ocean come alive with bioluminescent lights and fish raves. i guess it isnt a space game anymore. or maybe dream sequence beach episode?? WOAHHH OCEAN MAGICANT i might be cooking with this one Hold On. yesyesyes ok some sort of trip/dream where theyre shrunk down marinauts (whatever ocean prefix) as opposed to astronauts and exploring a cool coral reef/ocean floor area and talking to the sea life and woahhhhhh this would look gorgeous in pixel art. tbh this one could be in its own game considering how vivid the imagery is

outside: post-final-boss world returning to normal/person being rescued or uncorrupted/whatever magical thing happening. very fond of the bird chirps too <33 OH MUSIC BOX SOUNDS i also adore this one. i think the ending of this game is kinda bittersweet. we saved the world/person/whatever but At A Cost. this is sooooo pretty. would also transition well into credits

Green: and roll credits!! this would be the kind of credits theme i sway in my seat and contemplate the game to. the entire album is fantastic and these last few especially have been so lovely