#and now my body thinks any time i am louder than a strict librarian would shush me for it's gotta prepare to heal up again

[dredshirtroberts]

the saddest thing about my life to this point is that because of it, if I talk just slightly "too much", or I want to sing for longer than like a couple notes of a song (especially at an audible volume), or I start laughing in earnest, or I've eaten something delicious, i start coughing. This is because my body is so unfamiliar with the sensation of having a good time that it freaks out and over-produces phlegm any time i'm utilizing my throat because it has no idea how much we're supposed to need for this shit.

I spent most of my life not talking, or laughing with my whole being. (i did sing a lot but normally as part of a group and i was afraid of being heard and judged to be as bad as my sister told me i was at singing, so if i'm audible it's more likely to make my throat freak out). The eating thing may not be connected, but like. any time i've enjoyed a food, my throat's like "mmm we need more lube in here" and then BLAM phlegm city while i choke on it.

And then of course if my throat is raw from coughing because of the aforementioned things, you know what it likes to do? make more phlegm to lube that shit back up. Which makes me cough.

You'd think staying hydrated would fix this problem but no! in fact it does not! it can sometimes make it worse! my body is a horror show and existence is a nightmare! :D

[the-hilda-librarians-wife]

A Familiar Soul - Chapter Three

Summary: Hilda decides to be completely honest with her mother, surprised when she seems to be a lot more in on magic than Hilda had expected her to be.

With her daughter’s association with witches, Johanna is forced to face some secrets of her own, bringing her back to feelings and people she’d rather have left behind

Dealing with insecurities and inner demons of her own, Kaisa finds herself face to face with the very issues that brought her to be so displeased with her own abilities

Or: the one where Johanna is Kaisa’s familiar

Notes: I tried my best not to make Johanna’s parents downright abusive again but... that whole “this isn’t the sort of mum I wanted to be” breakdown Johanna had in The Fifty Year Night wasn’t something someone who grew up with good parents would do, I think. Hope you enjoy it!

Read it on ao3: (chpt1) (chpt2) (chpt3)

“Yep, this is certainly magical business just like you suspected, Frida. You can close your mouth now.”

At the librarian’s command, David closed his mouth and swallowed, feeling the bitter taste that arose every time he did so. He had been with his friends in the woods for a leaf identifying Sparrow Scout activity when he ate a berry that had evoked the most bizarre reaction from his body. Purple bubbles the same colour as the berry had sprouted on his tongue and made it feel like a dead slug inside his mouth, and as soon as the girls had taken a look at it they’d decided to go ask Kaisa what her opinion on the matter was.

“Am I going to die?” He whispered fearfully. David knew he could trust magic when it came from Frida, but aside from that his experience with it so far had been less than pleasant. Kaisa blew raspberry and swept a hand on the air, as if to brush his concerns away.

“You’ll be fine, don’t worry.”

The librarian turned her back to them and continued calmly typing on her computer behind the circulation desk, like she’d been doing when they arrived. Judging by the books on the counter, they assumed she was taking note of which tomes had been returned that day.

“Well?” Hilda shared a look with Frida as she asked. “What happened to him?”

The way Kaisa looked back at them and then to the side was uncharacteristic. She seemed to be battling with herself about whether or not she should answer them, which only made David worry that he was, indeed, going to die.

“He ate the berries of a bush protected by the fae people.” She explained at last, looking not at them but at the computer screen. “Terrible idea.”

“And how do we undo it?” Hilda stepped closer to the counter. The librarian placed her hand on top of one of the books, biting her bottom lip as she did so. Though she might not like Johanna, Kaisa wanted to respect her wishes as Hilda’s mother, and giving them what they needed very much went against them. It was the way Hilda was looking at her, with wide and hopeful eyes, that made her throw caution to the wind and give her the book. If the girl’s first reaction to disaster was looking for some random witch and not her mother, that was on Johanna.

“The potion is on page 63. It’s simple to brew, Frida shouldn’t have any trouble. Oh, and just for good measure, go back to the bush and place an offering on the ground for the faeries. They’ll enjoy anything sweet or shiny, as long as it’s not iron.”

“Thanks, Kaisa!” Hilda smiled up at her as she handed Frida the potions book. “You’re the best!”

The trio ran out of the library together, hoping to get started on their tasks as soon as possible. Until the doors closed behind them, Kaisa could hear Hilda talking about how she could handle the offering while her witch brewed the potion. She sighed and allowed herself to fall back against her chair, her head on her hands as she breathed deep.

The girl was too much like her mother.

_#_#_#_

It had been an extremely risky move on her part, but Johanna arrived safely on the ground. The palms of her hands were stinging from gripping her makeshift rope so tightly, and she looked up at the string of clothes she’d tied together in order to allow herself out of her room on the second floor of her house. As soon as her feet touched the earth, her best friend sighed in relief behind her.

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” Kaisa asked. “I don’t want you to get in trouble.”

Johanna turned to face the young witch with a bright smile. Since the day they’d met each other in the woods two years before, they’d been inseparable. And Johanna wasn’t about to let that change.

“A three pm curfew is ridiculous and you know it. I’m not letting you go on a cool magical adventure without me, Kai. Besides, they won’t even be home! I’ll be fine.”

Kaisa sighed. She had to admit Johanna’s curfew, as well as every other limitation her parents gave her, were very strict, but how fair something was or not didn’t change the fact that Johanna would be punished if she got caught. At least she knew Johanna was quite good at this: she knew exactly what to do to not be seen having fun. It was around this time in the afternoon that Kaisa got invited over to Johanna’s house to play on most days, since the girl knew her sitter would be too busy watching her soap opera to notice her sneaking another child in the house. Besides, it wasn’t like Kaisa could talk her out of helping her; when Johanna got something in her mind, nobody could stop her.

“If you say so.” She shrugged, turning her attention back to the book she was holding. It was wordy and hard to read even for an adult, but Kaisa rather enjoyed deciphering it. In its pages was all the information humans knew about the Draugen treasure. Tildy had assured her that it wasn’t real, nothing more than an old sailors’ tale, but Kaisa knew it had to be real. Out of the few things her mother had left her, this book was one of them, and Kaisa believed that her mother wouldn’t give her a book filled with made up information.

“So, where are we headed?” Johanna fell in step with Kaisa, trusting her friend to lead the way even if she occasionally had to point out a closed walking sign or stop her from hitting a person or a street lamp. Kaisa could get very distracted when she was concentrating on her books.

“To the harbour.” The witch said with confidence. “And then, to the Draugen treasure.”

_#_#_#_

Things hadn’t been as simple as that. Once at the harbour, the two children had to face the fact that they had no means to go underwater. Johanna knew how to swim, and she even offered to go and get the proof that Kaisa wanted to bring home to her mentor, but Kaisa declined, not only wanting to see the treasure herself but also knowing that no matter how good Johanna was at swimming, she wouldn’t manage to find the shipwreck.

Feeling stuck, she’d sat down on a bolster to think. Nothing in her book hinted at how to actually get to the treasure, she knew so because she knew each word in it by heart, and still she searched the pages hoping an answer would magically appear.

“It’s not too bad if we don’t find it.” Johanna cooed from where she was sitting on the sand. The disappointment in Kaisa’s face was something she didn’t like to see, and it made her want to hug her. “Even if you don’t have any proof to take to Miss Pilkfist… you know it’s true. That’s already enough, isn’t it? Plus, if we wait we’re going to see a gorgeous sunset from here.”

Holding her cheeks between her hands, Kaisa grumbled. “I guess.”

Even though she’d given up, Kaisa continued staring at the book. Until, that is, she heard her friend gasp.

“What a pretty seashell, look!”

On Johanna’s palm there was a pearly white conch shell, its shape a little too perfect for it to be natural. Kaisa hopped from the stone, extending her hand so as to ask Johanna to see it, but the girl didn’t notice. Instead, she chuckled as she took a better look at it.

“It kind of looks like a tiny tuba, doesn’t it?” Saying that, Johanna brought the shell to her lips and blew. Both of them shrieked when it made a sound much louder than they had expected, even the birds from nearby trees flying away in fright.

“What the heck?” Johanna looked to her left to check if Kaisa had also been as surprised by the vibration, but the witch was staring wide eyed at something behind her friend. Turning her gaze to the sea, the girl gasped as she saw a tower of water rise up, with eyes staring right at them. If a being entirely made of water could even look annoyed, Johanna was sure this would be it.

“A water spirit.” Kaisa whispered. “Johanna, you’re a genius.”

Johanna had no idea of what was happening, but given that Kaisa seemed to have she didn’t worry. Instead of running away like she imagined would have been the most logical decision, Kaisa walked closer to the spirit and uttered gibberish. At this point, Johanna had lost count of how many magical languages she’d already heard her friend talking in.

Apparently happy at having been talked to, the spirit shape shifted to the form of a bubble. Kaisa turned back to Johanna with a smile, offering her hand to help her get up from the sand.

“Come on, Anna. We’ve got a treasure to find.”

_#_#_#_

The underwater landscape was something they both knew they’d never forget. Miraculously, the water spirit had taken them, safe and dry, through the sea that connected their city to other far away lands. When Kaisa pointed out a picture in her book that showed a representation of the sunken ship, the spirit had set off to a certain direction without needing any further instruction, which left the two girls free to look at the fish that swam by them and the other strange creatures they couldn’t recognize.

Once they reached the boat, or at least what was left of it, they couldn’t help but stare in awe for a couple of seconds. As soon as the shock of actually having found it wore off of Kaisa, she fist pumped the air. She really had been right, and she’d prove it.

Aside from a single draugen who for some reason didn’t stop sweeping a broom around during the whole time they were there, no one seemed to be guarding the treasure. This allowed them to find the chests the book spoke of, filled with golden items and a variety of other items.

“We could be rich!” Johanna had said, touching the golden coins and chains as soon as the water spirit rolled forward so the chests were inside the bubble.

Kaisa shook her head. “I don’t think we should take any of it. Tildy says it’s never a good idea to steal from the dead. We don’t know what’s up with that Draugen there.” She pointed to the cleaner, who had explained his situation upon their arrival. “As far as we are concerned, he might have been cursed for trying to steal some of the treasure.”

The possibility made Johanna hastily drop the coins she’d been holding.

“Oh.”

“Besides, maybe someone else would like to see this in the future, and I wouldn’t want them to find nothing. “

Following that logic, Kaisa decided to take a chip of wood from the weak shell of the boat. Certainly, that was insignificant enough that they wouldn’t face any repercussions, and it still was something they could take home for her to show her mentor that she’d been right.

They were returned to the harbor by the spirit, who as kind as always nodded them goodbye. Kaisa stared at the spot where it had disappeared, thinking that now she’d have even more motivation to learn to speak Water Spirit. That one seemed like a good friend to have.

Just as the sun was beginning to set, the two of them arrived at Tildy’s home. The sorceress was sitting on her couch, crocheting something out of pink wool, and Kaisa knew she’d felt it when they entered the house even though she didn’t look up.

“Aha!” The girl cried triumphantly, walking up to her teacher and raising the chip of wood above her head. “I told you the Draugen treasure was real, Tildy! We’ve found it, and I can prove it!”

As serene as if she was going through a daily occurence, Tildy lifted her gaze up to her young apprentice and to her friend, who was just beside her.

“How lovely that you found a fun way to spend the day! And welcome, Johanna, I made a cake today thinking about you. Why don’t you put some water in the kettle and we can all eat it while having some tea?”

“Sounds delicious!” Johanna set off to the kitchen, having been there enough times to know where everything was. Kaisa was left standing in front of the woman with an eyebrow lifted.

“Thank you for this, dear.” Tildy said as she took the chip from her hand. “Just what I needed.”

She tilted her head to the side. “You’re not surprised? You believe me?”

“Of course I’m not. And you have always been more of an overachiever than a cheater, so yes, I do.”

“Wait…” Kaisa looked down with a crease between her brows, trying to put the pieces together as the mentor got up from the sofa.

“I do know the treasure is true. But you see, I needed something that belonged to a Draugen for a potion I want to make and that’s not really easy to get! So I thought I could count on you to want to prove me wrong if I said I didn’t believe in it.”

“Tildy!” Kaisa groaned. She wanted to be annoyed or angry but truly? She found her mentor’s behaviour quite amusing. Would she ever manage to outsmart the great arch sorceress, Kaisa wondered.

“Let’s go eat, now. You two deserve your cake.”

_#_#_#_

After eating, Kaisa had offered to walk Johanna back to her house. The days were getting ever shorter, and the wind was icy cold as they walked, but they didn’t care. Being with each other always made the rest of the world fade away, and once again Kaisa was grateful that Johanna had been so insistent on befriending her. They were laughing and shooting the breeze while they walked, until Johanna stopped abruptly and gripped Kaisa’s wrist so she would too.

“My parents are home.” She whispered stiffly, looking at the house’s garage, where there were now two cars. “They will probably have noticed I’m gone by now.”

“I’ll go with you.” Kaisa said immediately. “I’ll… I’ll say I pressured you to leave without supervision.”

Johanna gave her a sympathetic smile. There was evident sadness in her eyes, and she squeezed her friend’s hand.

“That’s exactly what I don’t want you to do and you know it. We’ve been here before. If they think you’re guilty of anything, they will want me to stop seeing you. Turn back now and it’ll be better for both of us.”

Kaisa’s shoulders slumped. It wasn’t often that something like this happened, but whenever it did, she was filled by a sense of helplessness before her best friend’s situation. Still, Johanna knew her own parents better than Kaisa did, so she always obeyed.

“Library as soon as you can?” Kaisa asked in a small, hopeful voice, knowing that Johanna’s parents wouldn’t allow her to leave the house at all for a while. It was their arrangement that whenever Johanna got grounded, Kaisa would be in the library at exactly ten in the morning every day until Johanna was allowed to leave, even if followed by her sitter, to tell her she was free to visit Kaisa and be visited by her.

Johanna nodded and let go of her hand, only heading toher house when Kaisa had already begun to walk away, so as to be sure her friend wouldn’t try anything heroic.

Her pace was closer to a run as she went back to Tildy’s. Tears stung at her eyes but she held them back. It wasn’t fair that Johanna would be punished if Kaisa was the one who had asked for company. It wasn’t fair at all. One day, Kaisa thought, she’d be strong enough to save her too.

_#_#_#_

When Johanna asked her how her afternoon had gone, Hilda had had to resist the instinct to say the first lie that popped on her mind. She was being honest now, she reminded herself. In the most calm and casual way she could, she narrated the events she’d gone through while her mother finished preparing their dinner, but it was easy to tell her mother did not approve of most, if not everything, of what she was telling. Her shoulders were visibly tight and her mouth was pursed, and the only reaction Hilda got were grunts. When the story was finished, the woman sighed tiredly.

“Hilda, I… I don’t know what to tell you. Sweetheart, you could have gotten hurt.”

“Mum” Hilda groaned, trying to make herself look taller. Why did her mother think she was so fragile? “I understand you’re scared for me because you just want me to be okay. But I am okay! This wasn’t dangerous, I promise. You had to see Frida, she was awesome! She’s so smart and skilled.”

Johanna took a deep breath as she took the pie away from the oven and over to the table. No, it wasn’t dangerous, at least what Hilda had told her wasn’t. She still didn’t like it, since her own experiences led her to be wary about that situation, but she knew making a storm in a teacup would only make it so Hilda never told her anything.

“You’re right, sweetheart. I just want to tell you to try not to rely on magic for everything. And Frida… she’s your friend, and a good girl, but do not idolize her, okay? She’s just as human as us, and you may not be able to count on her for everything.”

Hilda’s brow furrowed, thoughts about what it was that her mother wasn’t telling her clouding her mind. “She’s my best friend, mum. I know I can count on her.”

Johanna clenched the fist that wasn’t pulling herself a chair.

“I suppose you can. But listen to me on this, I don’t want you seeing the librarian again.”

Now sitting in front of her mother, Hilda blinked in surprise. “What? Why?”

“Anyone who feels this comfortable giving children magic is not to be trusted” Johanna answered simply, making her child sigh.

Getting her mother to trust her judgement would take a while.

[runenc03]

HH - Kaycee’s third year (part 4)

Writing date: November 2019

Genre: fluff fluff fluff. They’re starting to grow into their feelings though :)

Warnings: Nope, no warnings. I actually really like this chapter!

Word count: 7.9k

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Summer

He felt her before he saw her.

The tight pressure of her arms wrapped around his middle, the curve of her lips caused by her face being buried in the crook of his neck, her shriek of happiness filling his ears.

His smile doubled in brightness.

And to think he actually didn't want to come to the Quidditch World Cup. He had never been really into Quidditch, despite going to many Hogwarts matches to cheer for Harry. It just wasn't as exciting for him as for some other people. Ron had been nagging him about coming together with the Weasley's, trying to pursuade him by saying that Molly missed him, or that it'd be good for him to get used to magic again a little before the school year started. Nothing had helped though, and Ron had given up, when Sean had realised something very important:

Hermione had told him she would be staying with the Weasley's around that time.

Which meant Kaycee would be coming as well.

"Nice to see you too, Kayc."

The short girl lifted her head, positively beaming at him, eyes shining. Oh, how he'd missed that face.

"I missed you so much."

It was hard for Sean to put to words how strongly he felt it within him when she said those 5 words, so he concentrated on absorbing as much of her scent and warmth as possible for now.

"You have no idea how much I missed you, Kayc."

He wanted to stay there forever, basking in the sunlight of the field they were on, the excited buzz of people surrounding them, Kaycee's hair slightly tickling his jaw because she had tucked her head under his chin. Not that he minded.

What did bother him, however, was Ron's yelling seemingly becoming louder with every passing second. He tried to ignore it at first, but reacting just became inevitable after a while.

"Hey, Kaycee, I just found a really great spot to see the next match! If you come quickly, it won't be crowded yet! Oh, hi Sean."

Sean stayed silent, not really knowing what to say to such an utterly insensible act, but Kaycee lifted her head off of his chest.

He saw her uneasy smile towards Ron, but it didn't compensate for the empty spot on his chest completely.

"Yes, alright, I'll come with you Ron."

And that's when she seperated herself completely from his body. He couldn't really blame her, it was only logical that she wanted a good spot to look at the Quidditch game. It had been proven multiple times already that her height, as adorable as he thought that trait of her's was, was often challenging when it came to watching Quidditch matches. He couldn't help but long for a moment to themselves again though, without anyone interrupting.

But his semi-sulking session was cut short soon by Kaycee, who was shaking her curls, trying to get them to behave, even though he found her curls beautiful no matter what. When she was satisfied with her hair, Sean had just enough time to catch himself staring before she turned around again, looking expectantly at him with a broad smile, her eyes slightly squinted because of the sunlight.

"Shamu, are you coming, or are you going to stand there all day?"

He smiled back at her, and started to jog to catch up on her.

And when he walked next to her and the back of her hand brushed against his by accident, he sighed in contentment.

He was ready for a new year full of magic.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------- Autumn

"HARRY POTTER"

Sean's hand had immediately enclosed itself around Kaycee's wrist when Dumbledore had repeated himself, louder than the first time he had said Harry's name. They had all been in the Great Hall to finally find out who the contestants of the triwizarding tournament would be, and no one had expected Harry's name to come out of the renowned goblet.

Instantly, the Great Hall had been filled with urgent whispers from students, guests and teachers. The atmosphere had managed to get dark within seconds, and Sean hadn't known if it was just him who had felt so cold inside, or if there had actually been some sort of magic that had made the temperature of the Hall decrease rapidly.

Next to him, Hermione had turned her back to him, facing Harry and ushering him forward.

He had seen the hesitation in his friend's steps, the way his hands had clung to the side of his pants, a habit Sean knew he had created out of fear of not having a good grip on his wand when he was sweating in stressful situations.

Suddenly, someone had shouted, effectively overpowering all the other voices:

"He's a cheat!"

The shout had immediately been followed by someone else yelling that Harry wasn't even seventeen yet, and Sean had only been able to watch his friend's shoulders slump with every audible comment.

Then, when Harry had finally reached the other contentants, he had turned around, and his eyes had locked with Sean's.

The Ravenclaw had seen a lot of emotions swirling inside Harry's eyes, but the deep, raw fear was definitely the superior emotion swirling inside his orbs. Harry had been completely, utterly engulfed in fright, and Sean had felt the goosebumps on his arms erupt.

It was in that moment that he had vowed to himself that he would do everything in his power to help Harry.

And up until now, he had. Harry's name had come out of the goblet exactly thirteen days ago, and Sean had kept his promise. He had spent more time in the library than in the last 3 years together, searching for the right books to help his friend, reading them, taking notes and putting the information he collected into complicated schemes until even he couldn't see the logic in after a while.

To say that he was exhausted was an understatement.

"Mr Lew, I was kind enough the last time. Please give me the books you're reading now and leave the library. Your sudden obsession shouldn't interfere with my night rest."

Sean's back promptly straightened upon hearing the librarian's voice, and he felt his neck muscles protest at the sudden turn his head made. That was going to hurt tomorrow.

"My apologies, Madam Pince, I'll make sure-"

"I'll make sure he'll get to his common room safely, Madam Pince. Come on Sean, hurry up. It's too late to read something other than fictional stories."

This time around, both his and Madam Pince's head turned around abruptly. In the doorway of the library, a few feet away from him, stood Kaycee. She was wearing light pink pyjamas with little white dots on it and her hair was down, falling in dark ringlets past her shoulders.

"Shamu, are you coming, or are you going to sit there all night? You know Madam Pince wants to go to sleep, and I know that you could use some of that as well."

Kaycee's first sentence promptly brought him back to the last time she had said something along those lines, back to better times, when the only thing on his mind had been Ron interrupting their little moments. He hadn't even thought about Ron in the last month.

He stood up, quickly collecting his books and giving them to the librarian. It was only when he gave her the books that he was close enough to see the bags under her eyes, and a wave of guilt washed over him, knowing he had been the one who had been keeping her up for the past 6 weeks.

Thankfully, Madam Pince seemed to realise he felt guilty, for she gave him a small smile and a barely noticeable nod.

"Good night, Mr Lew."

He smiled back at the older lady and walked towards Kaycee, feeling his smile change from slightly awkward to genuinely happy. They began walking out of the library together.

"Let's get you to your common room, Lew."

Sean quirked his eyebrow.

"That doesn't make any sense Kayc, my common room is in a tower, yours is next to the kitchens. We're going to your common room first, and I promise you that I'm going straight to my common room as soon as you're safely inside yours."

But Kaycee was already shaking her head, her eyes closed and her eyebrows high, trying to make a strict face to show how much she disagreed with his plan.

"We're definitely not going to do that. I am going to bring you to your common room, and then I'm going to return. You have been doing research for way too long, and I do understand that you want to help Harry because I do too! I care about him a lot and I want to help him as well. The difference is that I understand that I'm not going to be able to fully support him if I'm dead inside, like you've been for the last 2 weeks, no offence. Also-"

Her words didn't seem to register anymore, his brain was way too tired for that, he could only focus on one thing at a time. For now, that thing was to get her safely inside her common room, no matter how hard she protested. Instead of listening to her, he automatically seemed to focus on the expressions she made, how her curls bounced as she moved her head, how her hands made such graceful gestures, trying to put more power to her words.

"And so it's more important for you to get more sleep tonight than I do than the other way around. I mean, I-Oh."

Kaycee had promptly stopped rambling when she finally took the time to look at her surroundings, and discovered that they had, in fact, walked to her common room, and not his. She faced him now, eyebrows furrowed, about to open her mouth again when Sean stopped her.

"Shh Kayc. It's okay. I'll promise to go to bed now, you've convinced me that it's important to get rest. Go inside now, I'm not the only one it's late for."

She was smiling again, and he noticed only now that the right side of her mouth went up a little more than the left side. She studied his face, her smile dropping a tiny bit when her eyes rested on the bags under his, but going up again when her eyes locked on his. She nodded.

"Alright, good night, Shamu."

She turned around now, took a few steps away from him, and Sean already felt colder than when she was by his side. She had already tapped the common room door in the rhythm of Helga Hufflepuff, and it had already given her access, when the words tumbled out of his mouth:

"Do you want to go to the Yule Ball with me?"

She turned around, surprise sketched on her face. It was only then that he realised what he had said, and he was about to open his mouth again to apologise, when she beat him to it.

Her surprised expression morphed into a warm smile again, her eyes shining brighter than they had all night.

"I would love to."

--------------------------------------------------------------------------- Winter

"Oh dear, Kaycee, you look breathtaking!"

Kaycee, turned around, looking at her sister with doubts swirling around in her mind. Was she as beautiful as her sister claimed?

"I-I don't know Mione. As beautiful as this dress is, I just feel like it's somehow too pretty for me, and tonight I need to...well, I need to be perfect."

At Kaycee's words, Hermione walked towards her sister, standing beside her and gazing in the mirror the Room of Requirement had been so kind to let appear for them.

"Kaycee Caitlin Granger. You see, there's this really important thing you're completely overlooking. You are stunning just as you are, every single day. You see this dress? It doesn't make you any more beautiful than usual, it just emphasizes what's there every day: your light, Kaycee. You are glowing, shining, lighting up a room when you walk inside. It's been this way since you were born. I still question why mum and dad never favoured you over the rest of us. I've never been jealous of it though. I am proud, Kaycee Granger, to be your sister. You are such an amazing human being and I'm proud of the extraordinary young woman you have become. I love you so much."

Kaycee could only smile, her eyes closed to prevent them from watering, searching with her hand for her sister's, and when she found it, giving it a little squeeze.

Hermione understood.

"Let's go, Kaycee."

And then the sentence that made the butterflies in Kaycee's stomach come to life:

"I bet Sean's already waiting for you."

Kaycee opened her eyes and looked straight forward, right into the mirror.

Her smile stayed.

In fact, it only brightened even more when she arrived at the top of the staircase, because Sean was standing at the base of it.

Sean. Shamu. The one she used to see as a wonderful friend. The guy, she started to realise during her second year, who made her skin tingle every time he took her hand, or gave her a hug. The person who, since the Quidditch world cup a few weeks ago, was the subject of all her dreams, dreams in which he held her hand in another way than what he did now, dreams in which he called her 'love', and 'darling', dreams in which they cuddled and once even kissed.

She could no longer deny what that all meant.

Still, she was content being just his friend. It meant she didn't have to confront him about her feelings, while still being able to be close to him. And with the way he looked at her while she came down the grand staircase, she definitely wasn't complaining anytime soon.

"You, Kaycee Granger, look absolutely breathtaking."

He said it with a breathy voice too, as if what he was saying was literally true. His eyes had a twinkle in them, his dimples ever-present.

"Thank you. You too, Sean."

And while she had been talking about him as a person, she realised now that the clothes he was wearing definitely did some good as well. His dress shirt was white, and the sleeves were rolled up, showing the veins on his arm. It was neatly tucked into his black pants, and his shoes shone, reflecting the candlelights that floated through the corridor.

"Ready to show them your dance moves?"

She laughed at that, both of them knowing that they would only get to slow dance. Not that she was complaining. She nodded, and together, they walked into the magestically decorated Great Hall.

That night was turning into the best of her life so far. She swirled around gracefully on the dance floor, without a care in the world, the music flowing through her veins, Sean's hand on the small of her back, her hands on his chest. She wished she could freeze the time and live in this moment forever, for this moment was absolutely, utterly and unquestionably perfect.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Why tonight?

It was a question she'd asked herself multiple times in the last half an hour.

Only 2 hours ago, she and Sean had stood at the base of the staircase, gazing at eachother. Everything after that -up until half an hour ago of course- had been an absolute dream. Kaycee had never ever wanted the evening to end, as cliché as that sounded.

Now, however, she wanted to go back in time, and not necessarily to do one more magical dance with Sean. While she had discovered that that was her favourite thing in the world, it was -looking back at it- way more important to make sure Ron would keep his mouth shut.

"Shh...Mione, it's all going to be okay, I promise you."

Hermione's crying didn't decrease one bit, however, and Kaycee was afraid it wouldn't stop anytime soon.

"B-but, you guys...you don't- he said that I was a-a traitor for going to the ball with the enemy."

Kaycee was just about to make sure her sister knew she wasn't a traitor, when she saw Sean stand up abruptly. He had been sitting on the other side of Hermione, and together they had been trying to cheer her up, but apparently, he suddenly had other plans.

"Hey hey hey, where are you going?"

Kaycee couldn't really keep the annoyance out of her voice. Sean had always been such a selfless, loyal person to his friends, and she didn't understand this sudden strange behaviour.

Sean turned around, and somehow his worried expression about Hermione's wellbeing had morphed into an angry scowl.

"To Ron. He doesn't deserve to have fun now. I'm going to tell him exactly what has been on my mind for a freaking year now. I've dealt with enough of his crap!"

"Sean w-"

But Sean had already stomped away, unable to hear Kaycee anymore.

She felt torn in that moment, standing beside her sniffling and clearly heartbroken sister, but also feeling the need to make sure Sean didn't do anything stupid.

"What's going on here- Oh crap Hermione, what happened? Are you hurt?"

The question had come out of Harry's mouth as an automatism, so aware of his friends constantly getting hurt on their adventures, that he hadn't thought of the other, non-physical kind of hurt. In this case, the double meaning made Hermione burst in tears all over again.

"It's Ron, Harry. He said some really freaking stupid things to Hermione and now he hurt her, as you can see, and Sean just ran away to go after Ron and he was so livid and while I know he won't do anything physical, I don't think he'll be that gentle either and I actually want to go after him but then Hermione's all alone and, and-"

"Kaycee, calm down. Take a breath."

Harry had laid his hands on both of her shoulders, and it immediately calmed her. She closed her eyes, took a moment for herself, and nodded.

"Kayc, you can go to Sean, I'll manage, promise. Ron's just an idiot and I need to get over him, that doesn't mean you should feel torn between staying here or going to Sean. Go, I love you."

"I'll stay with Hermione, Kayc. Hey, Mione, you like me just as much as your sister, right?"

There was something in Harry's tone that showed he obviously knew he could never surpass Kaycee, which is why it was so funny when he said it. And it paid off. Hermione slightly snorted, and while her smile was small, it was at least a genuine one.

It was all Kaycee needed to lessen her guilt.

"Okay, thanks. I'm just going to make sure they don't do anything stupid with each other. I love you both."

She heard the echoes of their 'I love you too''s, but she was already too focused to pay attention to them. Her steps were light but her pace fast, and she wished her hair was up in a bun instead of gracefully styled to lay on her back.

It wasn't long before she heard a voice, and for some reason she immediately recognised its owner.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?!"

She had just turned around a corner when she saw them: Sean had asked Ron the question while dragging him forward with the lace around his neck into a deserted classroom.

As soon as they were in, Kaycee came from behind the corner and sneaked to the classroom, where she stopped slightly right to the door, so she could hear their voices more clearly.

"W-what do you mean, Sean?"

"Are you serious? Don't act so surprised you hypocrite! I know Kaycee isn't my girlfriend yet, but Merlin Ron, the way you act is not okay either! Going out of your way to give her weird, misplaced compliments and then acting so utterly tactless to Hermione! Do you really think that's the right way to win Kaycee's heart? Because I'm telling you now that it's not."

On the other side of the wall, Kaycee's eyes had widened, because she hadn't missed a word of Sean's outburst.

She hadn't missed the 'yet' after 'kaycee's not my girlfriend' either.

Nothing had ever made her head spin as much as this one little word had, not even Mcgonagall's 'you're a witch, just like your sister' when she delivered Kaycee's first Hogwarts letter.

She was forced to focus once again though, because Ron had apparently found his voice back.

"Wait- you, you think I try to make Kaycee interested in me in that way? Why would you th-"

"WHY?! MAYBE BECAUSE YOU INTERRUPT EVERY SINGLE MOMENT ME AND KAYCEE HAVE TOGETHER!"

Kaycee heard footsteps after that. Seeing as she was too afraid to look through the door opening, she could only guess that Ron had been literally taken aback by Sean.

Kaycee promised to herself that if she heard wands being drawn, she would interfere. For now though, she wanted to hear a little more of the conversation.

"I- I, Sean I really didn't mean to do that, I promise you. I've never felt things for Kaycee like that, I love her, but I love her like a sister. Truly, I never wanted to steal her from you."

Kaycee frowned at that. She wasn't anyone's property, not even Sean's. She thought it was weird of Ron to put it like that, but she couldn't really blame him. If she was standing there in Ron's shoes, she too would probably try to please Sean as much as she could.

"It's not about stealing Ron, she's her own person, not my property. It's just that I don't understand why you are all over Kaycee, but insult Hermione. Was it really neccesary to call her a traitor? I just don't understand your behaviour. It's time to give something up, you can choose whether that's your immature behaviour or our friendship. Girls have feelings too, and it's not fair to play with those. They earn your respect, especially someone as amazing as Hermione."

Kaycee smiled, feeling a pleasant kind of warmth spread through her chest at Sean's words.

"Okay, I'll explain everything to you, I promise. But then you have to promise not to tell anyone, especially not Hermione, alright?"

Sean stayed silent, so Kaycee assumed he had nodded his head. Truth be told, Kaycee was also curious where this was going. When she had come here, she really hadn't expected Sean to drag her into the fight.

"Last year, I came to the conclusion that I somehow really, really like Hermione. I tried to get her out of my head at first, I mean she would never like me back in that way, but it didn't work, and at some point I really had to admit to myself that I fancy her. But she's always so mad at me, and I mean, I can't blame her, and I always try to be kind to her, but it just doesn't work, I always snap and I regret it so so much, every single time. In the beginning, I tried to make it up to her by starting a conversation, but you know better than anyone else that Hermione is really stubborn, and that she'll completely ignore you if she's mad at you. So I did the thing that seemed second best: being kind to Kaycee. I figured that if I was nice to her sister, she would see that I could be a nice bloke, you know? I never, ever intentionally flirted with Kaycee, I promise you that. And the interrupting of your moments with Kaycee...well, this is really selfish, but I just wanted to spend more time with her, because the more I did that, the bigger the chance Hermione would notice me. Or so I thought. Nothing has happened and she'll always see me as this annoying boy who apparenly looks like he's flirting with her sister. Oh Merlin I messed up. I'm so sorry Sean."

Kaycee didn't think she had ever had such an existential crisis. First, her annoyance at Ron for being so tactless, then her guilt for leaving Hermione, her utter disbelieve at hearing Sean say she wasn't his girlfriend yet, whatever that meant, immediately followed by Ron's mind blowing theory about being extra kind to her to please her sister.

It was all way too much, but not enough. She wanted to hear more, understand more details, figure things out to wrap her head around all this new information.

The 'too much'-part of her brain slightly overpowered the curious part though, because suddenly her legs gave out and she landed on the floor with a thud. She shut her eyes closed, praying they didn't hear anything, and she sighed of relief when Sean talked to Ron again, with a much calmer voice now.

"I-Ron. You idiot. Do you have any idea how much better it would've been for both of us if you would've been honest about this all along? I could've helped you, you know, instead of spending my time being jealous and annoyed at you. Look, tomorrow, we'll figure out a way for you to make it up to Hermione. For now, I think it's better to just go to bed, it's been a long day. Alright?"

What followed was the sound of an intricate rhythm of claps, and Kaycee couldn't help but smile, knowing it was a part of one of Sean's choreographies that only required hands, kind of like a difficult handshake. Sean had taught it to Ron about a year ago, in one of their good moments, to show Ron that dancing wasn't only for girls, Ron had actually thought it was cool and it had been their thing ever since.

Then, she heard footsteps, and she started to panic, knowing they were going to come out of the classroom soon. Quickly, she got up and hid herself in the broom closet a few feet away from the door. She had barely closed the closet doors when Sean came out of the door opening, followed by Ron. She saw Sean turning around to his friend.

"Okay, I need to go up these stairs to get to my common room. I'll see you tomorrow, alright?"

"Wow-wait, not so fast, Sean. Care to explain why you said that Kaycee isn't you girlfriend yet?"

Ron was facing Sean, obviously, so Kaycee couldn't see his face from her hiding place, but she could clearly hear the grin in his voice. Her main focus, however, was Sean's face, and how his expression turned from a happy but exhausted one to a surprised one, as if he had forgotten all about that sentence.

Kaycee knew she definitely wouldn't forget it any time soon, if ever at all.

Sean got a hold of himself again, the right corner of his mouth slightly going up.

"You know I can't tell you a lot about the time turner incident last year, but let's just say it made me realise some things, most of all how madly in love I am with Kaycee.."

Ron actually snorted this time, Kaycee could hear it. It distracted her from all the other things she had just heard, and she was glad for that distraction, she wasn't sure she would be able to stay silent if she permitted all those feelings and thoughts to completely get through.

"I'd say, welcome to the Seaycee shippers, Sean! Everyone has been a shipper for years, and that includes me, even if it may have looked like I wasn't. Now go and dream about your girl! Goodnight, Sean."

Sean's smile had grown to be a completely glowing expression on his face, and he nodded at Ron, walking up the first few steps of the staircase.

"Goodnight, Ron. Remember, Hermione might not be as unreachable as you think she is. There's always hope."

And while Sean walked up the stairs and Ron turned around a corner, Kaycee still sat in the broom closet, arms wrapped around her knees, silent tears of happiness streaming down her cheeks, wondering how in the world she got so lucky.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Why are we always talking about my love life? You have a crush on someone as well!"

Kaycee's tone was hushed while walking through the corridor with Luna, careful so no-one would actually hear what they were talking about.

It was the 24th of February, a few weeks after the Yule Ball, and Kaycee had had a bit more time to think about everything she felt towards Sean. It was clear to her now that her feelings went much deeper than just a crush, and she had realised that it was also the reason she hadn't jumped out of the closet a few weeks ago, but had instead cried her eyes out, even though she had been immensely happy.

"Because your crush actually likes you back, Kaycee Granger. I don't even know if Neville smiles at me because wrackspurts got to him or because he thinks I'm nice."

"Luna, I'm sure he thinks you're nice! He got all flustered when you congratulated him on the Gillyweed idea today!"

And it was true. Kaycee and Luna had watched the second task of the Triwizard tournament together. The whole task had ended about half an hour ago, and she and Luna had talked to Harry for a few minutes afterwards. After he told them Neville had given him the idea to use gillyweed, Luna couldn't help herself and congratulated Neville when they saw him right before walking back inside, where they planned on visiting the house elves in the kitchen. Luna had asked Kaycee to come with her -she had said that she wanted to try to interview a few of them for an article in the Quibbler- and Kaycee definitely wouldn't let go of the opportunity to get hot chocolate.

"Maybe...I don't know. The blushing could be the nargles' fault as well. I mean, I hope he blushed because of me, but I don't really want to get my hopes up either. You see, a broken heart tends to attract umgubular slashkilters, and you definitely don't want those anywhere near y-"

"You're such a coward, Longbottom!"

The origin of the sound could not be mistaken: this was Draco Malfoy talking, and one look on Luna's face told her he would regret ever speaking to Neville like that.

"L-leave me alone.."

They were almost at the end of the corridor now, the sound getting louder and louder. Kaycee could hear the sadness in Neville's voice, and it truly broke her heart. He was her friend as well, and he didn't deserve to be treated like that.

Malfoy's snicker echoed through the corridor, hard and cold. It made the hair on Kaycee's arm stand up straight.

"Why would we? You can't do anything, just like you parents, you ugly-"

"Actually, Draco Malfoy, Neville can do a lot of things. Did you know he was the one who advised Harry to use gillyweed? I'm sure he also knows about a plant that could turn you into a frog, or a stone or something, right Neville?"

All eyes were on Luna, Draco's big from surprise, Neville's with an admiring gaze in them. Kaycee wished she had a camera to take a picture of this, it would be the perfect picture to laugh at, because Malfoy's expression, and the best chance she would ever get at convincing Luna that Neville actually did like her.

"Uhh- yes, o-of course. Tribulus terrestris would definitely do the job."

Kaycee smiled at that. Luna defending him had clearly given him some much-needed confidence, although she definitely noticed how red his cheeks became when he named the herb, or how his eyes flickered towards Luna just a few times more than usual. Next to her, Luna cleared her throat impatiently.

"You heard him, didn't you, Draco? I think it's time for you to leave Neville alone, as he so kindly asked you. We both know I'm great friends with the house elves in the kitchen, and, I mean, I don't think you'd be so happy with some tribulus terrestris in your pumpkin juice tonight, or should I say sprite?"

Kaycee was very surprised to see that Draco actually paled even farther when Luna mentioned Sprite. She didn't know why, but Draco's face become funnier with every passing minute. The slytherin was silent for a moment, his mouth slightly opened, as if he wanted to say something, but didn't find the right words. After a while, he finally spluttered something:

"I-I'll go now. Bye, L-Luna, Neville, Kaycee."

And with that, he turned around and wobbled away, awkwardly trying to keep his pace between walking and running.

Kaycee couldn't help but laugh her head off, and Neville and Luna soon joined in.

"W-what just happened? I swear I've never seen Draco so..so..unconfident!"

They had calmed down a little bit by now, and Luna answered with her signature dreamy smile on her face again.

"Draco, he drinks Sprite. He charms his pumpkin juice to be sprite, and he's really embarrassed about it because it's a muggle drink, wizards usually don't even know it exists, and, well, you know how he gets with his blood purity and all."

"That's...genius!!"

It was Neville who had praised Luna, finally recovering from his fright and surprise, and Luna's ever-pale skin actually got some colour around her cheekbones. Kaycee thought it was adorable.

"Thank you, Neville. That's a very kind thing of you to say. However, Kaycee and I really must go now, we promised the house elves in the kitchen that we would pay them a visit. But you can join us if you want!"

"I would love to, but I'm still not doing well in charms and in astronomy, and Gran wants me to study more.."

Kaycee immediately felt sympathetic. Neville was always so kind and he worked so hard, but still his grandma couldn't see any of these admirable qualities. She wished she could help him, but she knew it was his gran who should realise things, not Neville who should study more.

"You know what? Let's study together in the library tomorrow! Madam Pince has always had a soft spot for Ravenclaw's, so she probably won't mind me tutoring you."

Neville smiled at that, clearly happy at the prospect of being able to spend more time with Luna. Kaycee desperately tried to keep her fangirling to a minimum.

"Y-yes, that'd be nice Luna. Thank you for defending me, by the way. I uh..appreciate it. A lot. So...thank you"

If Luna noticed his awkward repetition of words, she didn't show it. Instead she smiled -Kaycee wondered if she had even stopped smiling at all these last few minutes- and nodded at Neville.

"Alright, I'll see you tomorrow then. Bye Neville! Don't forget to get some tribulus terrestris, in case Malfoy ever bothers you again."

Kaycee quickly said goodbye to a suspiciously spluttering Neville, and followed Luna to the kitchens, feeling giddy about witnessing such a cute moment between those two.

It wasn't until weeks after that she finally understood why Neville had acted so weirdly every time Luna had mentioned the tribulus terrestris. She and Hermione had taken their turn in tutoring Neville in the library, when the topic somehow came up again. After much nagging of both of the sisters -Kaycee wanted to know why he always got so flustered while talking about it and Hermione just wanted to learn something new- he finally gave in: a herb that made someone turn into a frog didn't exist, let alone one that turned a human into stone. The tribulus terrestris did exist, however. It is a herb that increases a woman's fertility, and for some -in Neville's opinion very embarrassing- reason, it was the first thing that came to his mind while looking at Luna in that situation.

For Hermione, it was an interesting new thing she learned. For Kaycee, it was proof Luna definitely wouldn't have to worry about the umgubular slashkilters anytime soon. 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Spring

"How was it? Did he make a move? Did you make a move? Tell me all the details!"

It was an early evening, the last strays of sunshine warming up Kaycee's and Hermione's skin. Kaycee had just come back from a hogsmeade afternoon with Sean. He had asked Kaycee, Hermione, Ron and Harry who would go to hogsmeade, proposing they went together, but in the end, only Kaycee could go with him.

Or at least, that's what everyone wanted him to believe. Harry had been smart enough to understand the look on Hermione's face, and told Sean him and Ron had to practice for their charms exam. Hermione had claimed she would rather read something in the library than go outside. Sean thought she seemed a bit suspicious, but he had smiles nonetheless, and afterwards, Hermione had claimed giggling that he probably didn't mind spending alone time with 'his girl'

And now, with Sean safely out of earshot, Hermione apparently couldn't wait another second to hear everything about their afternoon.

Not that Kaycee minded reliving everything once more.

"Well, he- I...it was nice."

And then, when Hermione kept looking at her expectantly:

"He took my hand and held it for, like, half an hour. And we-"

"Wait, wait. How did he hold your hand?"

Kaycee looked at Hermione, confused. Why did it matter? Wasn't she happy for Kaycee? She really hadn't overthought the whole hand holding thing when it had happened. She'd been too busy just enjoying the tingles that had coursed through her in that moment.

"Just tell me, I read something about what holding hands means exactly and I want to see if it actually works like that in real life too."

Kaycee thought that was a bit weird, but at the same time, it was still Hermione who had said it, and that explained a lot, even though it didn't explain why Hermione found it so important.

"Uhm, well, his hand was in front, and he just took mine and intertwined our fingers. There wasn't anything excessively complicated about it, Mione"

But her sister apparently found this little fact incredibly valuable -and judging by the squeal she let out- really cute.

"Okay, now explain why this is so important."

Hermione seemed to realise again that her sister didn't know what was going on in her head, and her expression changed from a squeal into a normal smile. Her eyes kept their twinkle, though.

"Look, it has something to do with the subconscious state of us, humans. In the prehistoric era, humans were nomads, which brought some dangers with it. A man needed to protect his woman, and to make sure he could do that efficiently, he held her hand, with his hand in front of hers. That way he could push her behind him if there was any danger in front of them. He wouldn't be able to push her behind him that easily if her hand was in front of his. Wait, let me show you."

Hermione took her hand, and showed her that it was indeed much easier to pull someone behind you when your hand is in front of the other person's, than if it was the other way around.

"Nowadays, women are, of course, independent, and no longer need to rely on men to protect them, but most men still hold their partner's hand like that, subconciously to protect them. The fact Sean held your hand like that...well, you can draw your own conclusions."

And she did. Or at least, the butterflies in her stomach did before she gave them permission to move. She felt her smile getting broader again, after her confusion about Hermione's question.

"Thanks, Mione. That was a very useful piece of information."

Her sister smiled at her.

"Now go on! There's undoubtedly much more you haven't told me yet!"

"Well...we went to the three broomsticks first, where we had this whole conversation about dancing- oh and we agreed on making a choreo together this summer! And after that, we just walked around, he took my hand, as you know, but we were both too shy to actually say something about it, so it just kind of happened. We went into honeydukes to fill a bag of sweets - he let me pick the candy and there was this one sort I couldn't reach and he took it for me - and then we went outside to eat the bag while sitting on a bench. After that, it was time to go back to the castle. He didn't take my hand again, which was kind of sad, but he did give me a hug before going back to his common room."

By the end of her monologue, Hermione was positively beaming at her, which only stimulated her butterflies even further.

"And what are you going to do now? Does this mean you're a couple, or does he, like, have to ask you to be his girlfriend? Are you going to make a move next time you guys hang out?? Ahh I love this! My ship is finally sailing!"

And as much as she liked Hermione's enthusiasm, she wasn't about to do anything drastic that would change her relationship with Sean, even if change meant being able to act on all of her feelings.

She was still content with the way things were going now. She could easily enjoy holding Sean's hand while not making everything official yet. It was good this way, slowly getting to know this side of each other, without pressure from other people to do or to not do certain things. It wasn't that she had commitment issues, she was definitely and completely ready to tie herself to Sean in that way. She just wanted to do it their way.

"Everything in time, Hermione, everything in time."

And while the sun started to lower itself towards the great lake, Kaycee realised that there would indeed be a certain time for everything.

****

In many ways, Hermione's hug was similar to the one her sister had given him at the beginning of the school year, and in many ways, it was not.

Just like back then, Sean had felt the girl before he had seen her. The difference was, however, that this time, he had expected it.

Hermione had stayed strong up until madam Pomfrey had told them they weren't allowed to go inside, to go to Harry, and barely a few seconds after the nurse had turned her back to them to check on her patient, Hermione had crumpled, turning to him and burrying her face in his chest, curls bouncing as she cried, and his heart broke.

They stood there, he and Hermione, amidst of all the chaos. Some people were running away as fast as they could, afraid more bad things were about to come, others tried to get closer to that damned maze, their curiosity getting the better of them.

He tried to block out the outside world and concentrate on his best friend only, but it was no easy task, not with all the screams of terror of all the people who had only just seen Cedric Diggory's body. Sean saw from the corner of his eye that the hufflepuff was being dragged inside by Hagrid, Cedric's undoubtedly cold hand in his father's, who kept begging his son to wake up.

Cracks, blows, cuts in his heart.

He didn't know how much more he could handle.

Then, he felt a hand on his upper arm, slightly rubbing up and down, and he didn't have to look to know who it was. Kaycee was sniffing too, and it didn't take him and her sister more than a split second to include her in their hug.

Even though she was hurting as well, Kaycee made sure that she had given both Sean and her sister a kiss on the cheek before giving in to her own needs and burying her face in her sister's hair. At the same time, she took Sean's hand and intertwined her fingers with his.

For a brief moment, Sean wondered how they must look from the outside, him hugging two girls who weren't his family, but then he realised that everyone around them had better things to do than watching 3 people hug, and that even if someone saw them hug, he really, really didn't care. He already knew that the safety and well being of these girls would always be his first priority, and he wasn't ashamed of that. Besides, he was very aware of the fact that he wasn't only offering them comfort, they were the only reason he still stood straight as well.

And then suddenly, he felt another hand, on his shoulder this time, and he tilted his cheek from the top of Hermione's head to see Ron, looking paler than usual, tears brimming in his eyes. His friend wrapped one of his arms around Hermione's middle and laid the other on Sean's back, and Sean knew when looking into Ron's eyes that he didn't join because he was jealous that Sean was the one holding Hermione first. In fact, he knew that nothing of this was out of jealousy. It was out of love, for both him and Hermione, even though those were two completely different types of love.

In return, Sean put his hand on Ron's back, beckoning him to come closer, to join their hug, and Ron did. He heard Hermione sigh, keeping her arms around Sean but laying her head in the crook of Ron's neck, slightly having to stretch her own neck to do so because she was simply so much smaller than Ron.

And through all the darkness, the grief and the tears, he felt his mouth stretch into a small smile, looking at Hermione trying so hard not to let him go while also being close to the boy she loved in another way than a friend.

It made him think about all the good moments, him and Hermione finally succeeding in playing that one piano piece together, the way Kaycee's eyes shone during the Yule Ball- actually, no, the way Kaycee's eyes every day, Neville finally getting his deserved moment of victory after giving Harry the needed gillyweed,...

Hard times were coming, he was no fool, he knew it would be tough. But he also knew that in the end, it would be worth it. Worth it because he wanted all the people he shared those good moments with, to keep having a good life, a good world to live in. He wanted Hermione to be able to continue with S.P.E.W, wanted Ron to keep irritating her, Harry to finally have a moment of rest. He wished for Luna to get the courage to tell Neville about her feelings, instead of only smiling at his picture while laying in their common room, and he wanted Neville to give Luna that hug he had -according to Harry- been sleep talking about for 3 months now.

There was so much he still wanted for his friends, family and himself. All they needed was time, and he would make sure it's what they got. Time.

He was aware of the fact that he didn't know a lot yet, but he was convinced that in the end, everything would be worth it.

Light would drive out darkness.

It would.