#until it becomes an issue like my partner being so genuine and concerned about it and me having to be like

[dredshirtroberts]

the saddest thing about my life to this point is that because of it, if I talk just slightly "too much", or I want to sing for longer than like a couple notes of a song (especially at an audible volume), or I start laughing in earnest, or I've eaten something delicious, i start coughing. This is because my body is so unfamiliar with the sensation of having a good time that it freaks out and over-produces phlegm any time i'm utilizing my throat because it has no idea how much we're supposed to need for this shit.

I spent most of my life not talking, or laughing with my whole being. (i did sing a lot but normally as part of a group and i was afraid of being heard and judged to be as bad as my sister told me i was at singing, so if i'm audible it's more likely to make my throat freak out). The eating thing may not be connected, but like. any time i've enjoyed a food, my throat's like "mmm we need more lube in here" and then BLAM phlegm city while i choke on it.

And then of course if my throat is raw from coughing because of the aforementioned things, you know what it likes to do? make more phlegm to lube that shit back up. Which makes me cough.

You'd think staying hydrated would fix this problem but no! in fact it does not! it can sometimes make it worse! my body is a horror show and existence is a nightmare! :D

[snakes-writing-corner]

Mr. Puzzles Fluff Alphabet

Requested by… Me!

Coming out of hibernation ‘cause there is not enough Mr. Puzzles x Reader content out there so I am contributing to the pile because the hyperfixation I have on this man has me in a fucking death-grip.

It is 2 in the morning when I’m posting this so yippie brain-rot!!!

Anyways alphabet under the cut :D

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Very. I mean you are kind of the only person who’s ever bothered to get close to him!

He was extremely clingy when the two of you were just friends, but now that you’re his partner? That’s increased tenfold.

He’s very unpredictable so he’s pretty much a wildcard when it comes to ways he’ll show affection.

Sometimes he’ll gently pull you along by grabbing your wrist, sometimes he’ll nuzzle into your hair or neck, maybe he’ll cup your face like you’re a glass sculpture that might shatter, and sometimes he’ll just pick you up and twirl you around. Honestly? This lovable director will show you any kind of physical affection under the sun.

I do think he particularly would like to hold your hand though. He likes the warmth of your hand in his, and how it’s so small compared to his. It’s like your hand was just made for him to hold!

Overall, any physical affection is fine by him as long as he gets to touch or hold you!

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend?)

I fear having this man as a best friend because that means chaos.

Yes being in a romantic relationship with him would be chaos, but a friendship I feel would be more chaotic somehow???

Will break your door down to get an opinion on a new show he’s been working on, and will absolutely pester you until you comply.

Would probably get you to star in said show and then poke fun at you the entire time. Lovingly of course mind you!

Lots of talk sessions where the two of you just talk shit about other people because this man lives for drama, like wants the tea on everyone.

Would break into your house at 2 in the morning to steal food like a fucking rat (I say this in a loving way).

Anyways being besties with him means say goodbye to your doors because he’s kicking them all down to get your attention.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

Cuddling is definitely a must!!! Like he would love to cuddle!!!

This man has no preference to cuddling he just wants to hold you close to him! Definitely big spoon no questions asked, but he also loves having you lay on his chest.

I think his favorite way to cuddle though would be on his side with you snuggled into his chest. You would probably look very small compared to him like his body would basically envelop yours, but hey he’d be very warm at least! Mr. Puzzles would probably just lazily comb through your hair with the goofiest smile on his face, whispering little words of affirmation under his breath as he did so.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they around the house?)

Oh definitely! But, after he becomes all rich and famous! He wants the best life for you after all!

Definitely a housewife though when he’s not busy working on his shows, like this man is a workaholic. I genuinely think he enjoys cleaning and repetitive tasks in general, helps him think.

When working on his shows or stressed? Yeah no the living space can easily become a train-wreck as he gets increasingly more frustrated over whatever he’s working on.

You could probably leave the studio on any given day, and either come back to it spotless or a wreck. There’s like a 50/50 shot whenever you leave.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Nuh-uh, not happening, you are literally stuck with him now, and he is NEVER LETTING YOU GO. :)

Yeah that’s definitely not concerning! Good luck my guy because Mr. Puzzles has some attachment issues, and will not leave you no matter what you do!

But hey! You probably won’t get to leave him either! At least he won’t let you without a fight! (Get this man some therapy or something)

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Very big on commitment honestly part of him wants all of your attention to himself, but he loves you enough to not go that far.

I think he’d be kinda iffy on marriage. On one hand he could throw this big event for the two of you, letting everyone know you’re his.

On the other, he’s fine not getting married at all! As far as he’s concerned as long as you’re completely committed to him romantically there’s not really a reason to get married?

Honestly whether he gets married to you or not would depend on your preference.

Would probably still get you an engagement ring of some kind no matter what your answer is, just so others’ know you’re committed to someone.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Oh my god this man? Gentle as a feather physically. Emotionally? He tries to be as gentle as he can, but that temper gets the better of him sometimes.

He holds you like you are glass about to shatter, like he’s holding the most precious thing in the world.

Cups your face in his gloved hand and just admires you like the most beautiful art piece ever created. Might even lightly bump his screen against your head wondering how he got so lucky.

Most of the time he’s a bit aloof regarding your emotions he likes to tease you after all!

But in serious moments his tone will get noticeably softer as he listens, and tries to help you with whatever you are dealing with in anyway he can.

Now granted, Puzzles gets frustrated easily, and might lash out at you occasionally or straight up manipulate you, but he tries to make up for it.

Just be patient with him.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? What are their hugs like?)

Yes.

Hugs are a constant thing with this man he loves to hug and hold you. Though he will probably pick you up to hold you.

Most of the time he’ll come up from behind, pick you up, spin you around a bit, saying something like “There’s my little angel!”, and then hug you!

Definitely puts his screen to your head and makes a loud “mwah!” sound.

He’s a dork when it comes to hugging he wants to make you smile, that and he just likes having you close to him.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

After you get together?

All. The. Time.

Not in a bad way of course he wants you to know he absolutely adores you! Words of affirmation are part of his love language after all!

Says stuff like “I love you my precious starlight.” or “Gosh you’re just so cute! I truly do love you when you give me that look my dear!”

He is serious every time he says it though, but will not hesitate to fluster you with that phrase.

Can imagine him saying “I love you.” in a low husky voice to make you weak in the knees.

He likes to see you get all red in the face and become a stuttering mess. He’s a tease like that. :)

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Puzzles has attachment issues this man gets extremely jealous very quickly.

If he thinks anyone is getting even a little touchy with you? He’s walking over, putting his arms around you, and talking to the offender with fake enthusiasm and venom in his voice.

The person doesn’t get the hint? Lightly veiled threats start coming out.

Would resort to violence as a last resort.

If it’s a more light version of jealousy he’ll probably dramatically pout in the corner with his arms crossed until you come over and give him attention.

He’s very dramatic with jealously like a dog not getting attention when it wants it.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Uhhhh I mean he has a TV for a head he can’t exactly kiss you per se.

But Puzzles tries to make it work! Most commonly he’ll gently tap his screen to your head or hands with a little electric shock to give the illusion of an actual kiss.

Is not much for you kissing his screen though since he’ll have to clean it afterwards…

But you want to get this man to melt into you? He loves being kissed on the neck, or on the bottom of his TV, might as well send sparks through his entire body. Would definitely love neck bites as well.

Honestly would not care where you kiss him he’s just happy getting your affection.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

I think he’d be pretty good around children at least outwardly.

Probably would be trying to entertain them with cartoons or little puppet shows.

Do not think he’d actively put himself in a situation to be around children though. I don’t think he likes them very much.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Puzzles would get up without waking you, get dressed, get some coffee, and then would make the two of you breakfast.

You typically tend to wake up before he’s finished, but if you aren’t then he’ll gladly give you breakfast in bed!

Would make fun of you for being a sleepyhead though.

Mornings with Puzzles would start off quiet, but get progressively louder as you both wake up a bit.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

I feel like nights go one of two ways.

Either A. Chaotic as hell or B. Actually nice

A chaotic as hell night includes Mr. Puzzles having some sort of mental break which results in him overworking himself and refusing to go to sleep and/or him frantically at a board with a bunch of papers on it trying to come up with ideas.

While this rarely happens it can if his shows aren’t doing as well as he would like or if you’re gone for long periods of time. The best thing to do here is gently talk to him and get him away from his area of work to help him calm down. A nice cup of hot tea or hot cocoa would help as well!

A nice night is more common though since Puzzles does think sleep is important. Probably ends with the two of you winding down by either cuddling in bed or watching TV (an actual TV though not his head he likes being able to hold you) while you two have blankets and/or hot tea to sip on.

Alternatively you two will cuddle in bed and just talk about whatever comes to mind until you two fall asleep.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

He’s pretty open about his past but not so much about what he doesn’t want you to see.

He shares stories from when he was a kid a lot, mainly about his mom, (I get a huge mama’s boy vibe from him) or his struggles making friends and connections until you showed up.

Also talks about his frustrations about getting into directing shows and how no corporate big shot would give him a chance so that’s how he made his own company! Also loves talking about ideas for new shows or really anything that comes to mind this man has no filter and just says what pops in his head.

He does not talk about things he doesn’t want you to know. Mainly that he smokes but he’s also definitely done some fucked up stuff in the past to get where he is today so he keeps that under wraps.

Wouldn’t want his darling angel to worry about those little hiccups~

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

We are literally talking about the person who sang about how ‘patience is a virtue uttered by fools’ this man has close to none.

He gets very frustrated and angry when things don’t go how he planned them to. He also can get frustrated if you don’t tell him things.

While he never tries to direct his anger at you he tends to lash out when frustrated and says things he doesn’t mean. However, he would probably apologize in the end if he really hurt you with his words.

Would never think of getting physically violent with you though he would much rather cut off his own head again than do that.

It would be very odd hot to see the man who holds you so gently be able to so easily make a sizable dent in a metal object.

Definitely has punched many holes in the walls and covered it up with something.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

My guy.

My buddy.

This man will remember every little thing you have told him about anything you like. He has a little notebook dedicated to writing little details about you so he doesn’t forget.

Knows just about everything you’ve either off-handedly mentioned about yourself or straight up told him.

Has various things written down like your favorite color, food, drink, cartoon, etc. Like literally anything you can think of that you could say about yourself he probably has written down.

Also has a page just describing how much he loves your looks down to the littlest detail but that’s not as important.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

When you two officially became partners.

He was so anxious to ask on the inside but kept the outwardly performance up as he was desperately trying to figure out how to go about it.

He broke one night and frantically made a board full of ideas for what he could do, but none of them were good enough! You deserved so much more than-than this!

You just so happened to walk into this scenario but Mr. Puzzles didn’t notice you as he was too focused on his board. You heard him muttering to himself about how “this had to be perfect” and “no, no that wouldn’t-”.

You eventually got concerned and walked up to him, accidentally scaring the living daylights out of him by the way, and as he tried to stutter something out you realized just what the board was about.

You then looked at him as he was still trying to come up with an excuse and just looked at him with wide eyes as you just blurted “And here I was scrambling to figure out a way to ask you out myself.”.

Puzzles just stared at you wide eyes and shouted “Wait really!?”

Anyways that night ended with you two just watching a movie on the couch and you’ve been together ever since.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you?)

Oh very protective.

Like you get scary tall guard dog partner privileges.

Most of the time if you’re with Puzzles no one would really dare to try anything because of how tall your TV man is, but on the off chance some asshole wants to try his luck?

Well Puzzles most definitely has a kill count.

In actuality he’d probably make threats towards the person, never getting outwardly aggressive as he doesn’t like to be the one fighting, but if the aggressor tries to touch you?

All bets are fucking off.

Despite what his personality may suggest to you if it comes down to it this man can pack a punch if need be. He is deceptively strong for how he looks and could easily beat a man to death if he wanted to.

While the fight would not end with the aggressor’s death as Puzzles does not want to kill someone in front of you, there is a good chance that person might end up mysteriously dead with no evidence tracing the murder back to him later down the line.

This man is slightly unhinged when it comes to keeping you safe.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

This is Mr. Puzzles we’re talking about he’s going all out!

Would definitely have a fancy dinner or something equally extravagant. I can see him liking to slow dance with you in a ballroom if given the chance.

If you prefer more casual dates then hey he’s up for that too! He’s paying though no ifs, ands, or buts about it! He loves movie dates and stargazing as date ideas.

Anniversaries are an all out occasion he’s standing his ground on that one because it’s special date and he wants the entire day to be special to the both of you.

Tries to get you gifts he knows you’ll like instead of fancy things though.

Okay maybe one or two pretty rings and such but mainly things you’d actually enjoy or give that big smile at receiving. I think gift giving is one of his love languages after all so expect to have lots of little trinkets.

He tries his best to make you smile everyday so he tries a lot for you.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

He has some… unfavorable aspects of himself he doesn’t want you knowing the true extent of.

He does not want you to know he smokes as he thinks it’s an undesirable habit and always deflects any questions about why he might smell like smoke or any cigarettes you might find.

His temper also gets the best of him at times leading to him lashing out and making dumb decisions that he tends to regret if he thinks about it too much. Though he has wrangled it in around you it can be explosive and violent when you aren’t around to witness the full extent of it.

He is also very obsessive with you and he knows it. It’s definitely toxic obsession as well because at his worst moments mentally he has debated keeping you to himself and not letting you leave. He’s also considered sabotaging all of your relationships so you only rely on him and no one else.

A dark part of him wants to keep you all to himself so no one can take you away from him ever.

Thankfully, he respects and loves you too much to act on those thoughts but god rest the poor soul that does anything bad to you because odds are…

Their life is on a very short timer.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

Oh my god yes.

Yes he so is.

He wants to look his best around you 24/7 all day every day and somehow does not even have to try for it.

He needs to always look presentable because a good director should always look ready all the time!

Is dramatic as fuck if his shirt gets wrinkled or something like damsel with their hand on their head going “my poor husband” dramatic.

He’s very silly like that and you love him for it.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Yes.

You are the only person who ever really tried to get to know him, who puts up with his silly shenanigans, and who he fell in love with.

Truthfully without you? He’d completely lose it mentally because you are his rock. The one person he knows can pull him back from the darkest corners of his mind.

Not that you’d ever know this but Mr. Puzzles does. He knows that now that he has you he would not be able to live without you and continue to pretend to be even remotely sane.

X = Xtra (Random HC)

Plays his dreams or soft static on his screen when he’s in a deep sleep.

Claps his hands when excited and fidgets with his suspenders a lot.

Also makes tons of motions with his hands while he talks.

Y = You (How would they talk about you?)

This goes one of two ways.

Either he’s all giddy and cheerful like a schoolgirl with a massive crush or sounds very concerning as he talks about you like a follower would a god.

Pick your poison because both are accurate it just depends on how he’s feeling that day.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

Will. Not. Let. Go.

Like if you wake up before him you are not getting up because he has the grip of a koala and probably has his arms and legs wrapped all around you.

But sometimes if you wake up before him he ends up in the funniest positions like sprawled out in ways that should break his bones. It can be very funny and disturbing at the same time.

[turbulentscrawl]

Identity(V) Headcanons: Naib Subedar

yall know the drill ;) If you like how I write the characters, consider sending me a request or matchup!

I also don't really have the patience to sit on my posts for a few days and check for mistakes, so forgive my typos hahah

-Naib got into his line of work out of necessity, not desire. He has never enjoyed taking lives…but he is both very good at it and very professional about it. He’s survived so long, in part, by being good at compartmentalizing his emotions. Work is work, and life outside is not, and he’s somehow managed to separate the two without separating his mental state. Nevertheless, he’s a very different person when he’s on the job and he would prefer that his loved ones didn’t see that.

-Outside of work, Naib shares Norton’s sentiments of all life being created equal. Unlike Norton, however, he uses this as a motivation to protect people rather than concern himself with revenge. That’s not to say he won’t step in if someone is out of line, but he is primarily focused on contributing good to the world in his free time.

-That said, Naib’s moral compass has become a bit warped over the years. He does his best to be a good person, but at a certain point someone can have so much blood on them that it starts to color their vision. The opposite of rose-colored glasses, if you will. He is, however, an accurate and consistent judge of character, so he often thinks about his course-of-actions in the frame of ‘would my mother be proud of me for this?’ That helps a lot with any difficult decisions.

-Naib “gets along” with most people. Being rough around the edges as he is sometimes makes it difficult for people to tell where they stand with him, but in truth he’s very vocal when he doesn’t like someone. It generally takes someone intentionally and repeatedly antagonizing him before he starts to develop a negative opinion. Otherwise, he maintains politeness.

-He is very slow to let people in, however. Naib’s life is dangerous and fleeting, so even when he likes someone he’s hesitant to get close to them. Outside of the manor, he’s a genuine slow-burn sort. A real “we’ve known one another for years and I’ve liked you for almost as long but I wont let myself have you until it’s entirely too much to take and I initiate an explosive night of passion” sort. Inside the manor, though, I think it’s more of a “we take comfort where we can get it, and then it slowly becomes real” sort of thing.

-Used to being the man of the house, Naib has a habit of trying to speak on behalf of or otherwise handle people’s problems for them. Again, he’s a good judge of character, so he’s pretty accurate in gauging how people would want situations handled…but this can still cause tension with friends and partners who are more independent. And if you talk to him about wanting to handle something yourself? There’s a non-zero chance he’ll go behind your back and take care of it anyway.

-The best love languages for Naib are Gift Giving and Words of Affirmation! He likes receiving thoughtful gifts—specifically ones that help in his everyday life, or resolve an issue he’s having. (Even if that issue is just “I’m hungry” and you pick up some of his favorite snacks.) He also likes little trinkets that he can easily carry around to remind him of the giver when he travels. Naib also tends to give kind words the benefit of the doubt, so he accepts verbal affection without argument or doubt. Everything he does is for his loved ones, and he likes to know that he’s appreciated, loved, and missed when he’s gone. Letters are amazing too; he keeps every letter and picture he receives and treats them with as much care as possible.

-Naib could not be close with someone who has a problem with his work. He understands why they would, he himself is rather tired of it.... But he’s been doing this for too long and is in too deep to leave. He and his mother cannot afford for him to quit being a mercenary and take the time to try learning some other skill that may or may not keep food on the table as consistently. You don’t have to like his work, but it can’t be something you hound him about. If you don’t talk about it, neither will he, and you can both just pretend it doesn’t happen.

-He’s a walking garbage can. I mean it, he can and will eat anything provided to him. He has preferences of course, but after years of food insecurity and then subsequent years of service-provided meals, he’s learned to not be picky. He also never outgrew the habit of rationing and hiding food in case of emergencies, and is an avid believer in the 5-second rule because he dislikes wasting food.

-Because he eats so much--and in spite of having irregular sleep patterns—Naib always has a lot of energy. This is useful for work and matches but also shows itself in other ways…such as being a very animated conversationalist. (per the stageplay lol) It’s only obvious when he’s moderately comfortable, but Naib might legitimately be incapable of sitting still when he’s not on guard.

-He’s pretty bad at making jokes. His sense of humor came from his years in the service, surrounded by brothers-in-arms. As a result, his idea of good-natured joking is completely ragging on people. Norton is the main person in the manor who gets this, but it leaves most other people to wonder if they’re actually friends or if they hate one another.

[huntunderironskies]

infodump away, my good friend — 1) guilt for silas, 2) midnight for charlotte, and/or 3) hunt for leo

:^) Oh boy!

Silas

As you know extremely well, Silas is the embodiment of Catholic guilt. I am not exaggerating in the slightest that he's convinced he's damned. The fact that he died and is currently Schrodinger's Zombie is not helping. He does think that God has given him one final chance but the only way he's salvaging his life is by making some sort of incredibly grand sacrifice that nobody else could possibly do. He's not sure what it is, but he's sure that God is going to guide him to it.

Being that he's damned, it logically follows (at least in his own head) that he can't become more damned on the path to being not damned, and that's why this keeps involving him committing nonviolent crimes (he doesn't want to actually kill anyone because if he does, they might die without getting a chance to repent for anything they did wrong, which is bad.) That aside, he is exceptionally perfectionistic when it comes to his behavior, down to never swearing, but this is more trying to prove to God that he really genuinely means he wants to be saved and is willing to do whatever it takes.

The extreme tl;dr of how this all started is he got dragged into running some errands for a local crime syndicate when he was young and desperately trying to keep his family out of poverty. He was gullible enough he didn't completely understand what he was getting into until it was too late and they didn't take him trying to do the right thing and back out well.

They didn't expect him to come back, of course. :V

Charlotte

I'm not going to dance around the issue, Charlotte has borderline personality disorder. So the questions around what her anxieties et al are is...a lot, and she does in fact tend to sleep pretty poorly because she's in a near-constant state of agitation despite not looking like it. This can be more "positive" in the sense of her hitting a grandiose phase where she's busy with working and plotting, or negative in the sense she's collapsed into a self-loathing lump.

Charlotte is exceptionally concerned with coming across as sensible, no-nonsense, and generally someone who both is taken seriously but also is the kind of person you aren't afraid to approach with your problems. There's some element of brutal practicality to this, because she knows that knowing everyone else's dirty secrets is worth its weight in gold and also she does kind of deal in acting as a ringleader for a third-party whistleblower who can silently release information about social parties (whether they be corporations, politicians, or anything else) who would otherwise be too dangerous to speak openly against for a single person.

She really, really, really, really is invested in this idea of herself as a clever above-it-all social manipulator. On some level, she expects everyone to be completely transactional in their relationships with her

Unfortunately, she is very aware that she has actual emotions and that they're pretty difficult to control. She hates the general fact that there is a seething core of anger, fear, and frustration that's constantly boiling beneath the surface because it's so contrary to what she wants to think of herself as being like and because she knows people won't like it if they see it. Like a lot of people with "quiet" borderline, she tries to bury her emotions until she has an implosive episode. She's still incredibly petty and vengeful when she feels slighted and fantasizing about revenge is something she's very prone to do.

(Side note, she's a lot easier to manipulate than she wants to believe she is and she's very easily won over by flattery, it's not a coincidence that her two most consistent partners are very effusive in their affection, which is good because she needs near-constant reassurance but struggles with actually asking for it, so someone who's going to show it without her actively prompting it helps. A lot.)

...oh, and she can't have nightmares. Like, literally. It's impossible. So that doesn't really keep her from sleeping but everything else does.

Leo

So. Leo's dad is a piece of work. Here's his theme song. Anyway, they aren't outright trying to kill each other but they're both strongly considering it.

Leo's dad (hence, Elijah) works for a subsidiary of Cheiron Corp called Maranatha and is currently Maranatha's CEO, a position he inherited from his father/Leo's grandfather. Maranatha takes a more biblical approach to Cheiron's usage of monster parts-- specifically, they believe that humans were meant to inherit the Earth and are allowed to have full dominion over what's in it. Monsters are trying to take that birthright from them...and if humans are allowed to take all resources of the world that God gave to them, it's only right that they take power from monsters in order to ensure the world remains in their hands.

(EXTREME oversimplification here but we'll be here all day if I give the full theological details, it's essentially a Christian dominionist worldview.)

Leo grew up extremely sheltered (technically relevant: they're DFAB, I always assumed this was implicitly obvious but it seemed like it flew over the heads of a lot of people in the game they were in? I guess you need an understanding of typical gender role dynamics within American evangelical subcultures) and their future was always kind of decided for them. They never knew what kind of wetwork their dad was involved in until it was too late.

Maranatha had developed a new, highly experimental procedure and they needed a host for what they believed was a new and heretoforth unseen relic, a part of God's body itself. If you ask Elijah Giles, he'd prayed long and hard on the matter, and giving up his eldest child was no easy feat. Men are usually the one on the front lines, anyone else getting the chance to take up the sword of judgement is rare indeed. Still, he was sure he'd made the right choice. Leo was devout, pure, the perfect servant of God. They'd earned it in a sense, even if they were an unconventional choice.

Still, it's a little suspicious he didn't choose his trueborn son over his daughters when they'd tried so hard for so long to have a proper heir, isn't it? Especially given how dangerous it'd have been.

The procedure failed in a way that absolutely nobody expected when the Dark Mother pulled the metaphysical equivalent of "I licked it, it's mine now" which is why Leo is both a Stigmatic and a Beast. They did not have a good time and it's going to be everyone else's problem, especially Maranatha. Leo's been hunting them down with single-minded dedication and their secondary focus is on the God-Machine itself, which they have internalized an extremely odd theology around (I think I've mentioned the Church of the Night Angel on this blog before, so...they are an extremely devout member of it to the point that more senior members have been desperately trying to keep a metaphorical leash on them so they don't do something stupid in the pursuit of the Church's goals.)

Leo is...less paranoid than you'd expect because they have absolute faith in the Dark Mother to lead them down the right path. They are absolutely desperate to trust people, in fact, and while they can be a bit wary of others at first they try their best to be friendly, the problem is that their "friendly" is deeply offputting for reasons that are very complicated to explain but long story short they are incredibly socially awkward and only part of that is from being so isolated they only had extended contact with their family and a few other people within the Maranatha inner circle until they were ten.

[wallflowerimagines]

Hi! if your not busy or backed up could you do the four lords( and possibly the dimitrescu daughters totally cool if you dont) helping a s/o who's stressed about starting college

I'm cracking my knuckles right now. CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!

Warning: Some unhealthy behaviors? You call these dorks out on it though.

Alcina Dimitrescu

Initially, you're stoked! College is a big deal for anyone at any age, and you're thrilled to check off this box on your list of accomplishments. It's a big deal!

A...really, really big deal...

Your internal monologue becomes a mess of "Oh god, oh fuck, oh no", on loop, ad infinitum. There's a lot to consider here, and with every new thought you just get even more stressed.

The minute Alcina sees you in this state, she pulls you in for a hug, plays with your hair, and talks you through your feelings. Do you really want to go to college, or do you feel forced into it? Are you worried about the distance? The amount of work? Do you want her to hire tutors instead?

She very much takes a logical, structured approach to addressing your worries. If it's a problem with paperwork, she can have someone handle it for you. If it's general stress she very efficiently talks you through your feelings. If there's someone in particular that's making you feel this stressed, they'll just disappear. No muss, no fuss.

Alcina dissects any possible reasoning you might have to be pressured until it's such a non-issue you feel almost silly for being panicked at all.

Still, she promises to call you every day, if you need her. Honestly, she expects you to call as often as possible, because she's going to miss you like crazy. But she will always be there for you, Darling. Don't you ever worry about that.

Donna Beneviento

College? You're leaving? 🥺

Donna's not trying to guilt you, but the thought of being away from you for an extended period of time is extremely stressful. It's not quite separation anxiety, but it's close.

Something might happen to you if you're away from the Manor for too long! What if you need help and she can't get to you? What if someone tries to hurt you? Donna might be sheltered, but she's heard things about what happens at Colleges, and not all of it is good.

Considering the fact you're also stressed about this situation, it's not a great combination. Both of you are very emotional at the moment, so there's a likelihood that this might cause one or both of you to have a little breakdown.

Instead of your normal fun, relaxing nights together, the lead up to your departure gives your nights a different atmosphere. You're on the floor of the sitting room, sifting through paperwork with a devastated look on your face, while Donna is nearby and trying hard to pretend this isn't happening.

One of you is going to break first, and the confrontation is not going to be pretty or easy. It's a build up of a bunch of emotion, and both of you just sob while holding each other tightly. You vent your worries to Donna, and she explains her concerns to you, and while you guys might not solve all of those dilemmas in one night, both of you do feel better after having explained your anxieties to each other. Communication is key for this to work out, and both of you need comforting.

Donna winds up building you a brand new doll with a piece of her Cadou in it. It's a new member of the family, specifically crafted to keep an eye on you and help you two communicate over long distances. If something goes wrong, or you two miss each other so badly you can't stand it anymore, you two talk through this new friend and immediately feel connected. The distance doesn't feel so great anymore <3

Salvatore Moreau

HYPED! (Devastated)

Moreau adores you, and he is so, so happy you're going to go pursue your dreams. He can't wait to hear about all the things you've experienced, all the people you meet...

You're going to make tons of new friends, he just knows it!

(You're going to meet someone else, someone better, and you're going to leave him. He just knows it. )

Moreau will never tell you how he really feels about you leaving. You could have a full blown panic attack, and he will hold you close, comfort you, reassure you, and do his absolute best to make you feel better. Meanwhile he is absolutely trying to bury the fact that he thinks you're going to meet your perfect partner at college, abandon him, and live your own version of happily ever after.

It might sound silly to you, but it's a genuine concern for him. He's a monster, and you're about to leave to spend time with a bunch of normal people. As he holds you close and convinces you that the things you're stressed about are easily solvable and are tasks that he could help you with, internally he's absolutely convinced that once you leave, you're going to find your soulmate on campus.

The last thing he wants to do is add to your stress, so unless you can read him well, it's likely you'll never know how worried he is. He's so focused on comforting you and making sure you feel confident enough to handle your next adventure that his own worries take a backseat.

He'll be less concerned if you call him and tell him about your day. It reassures him that you love him, even from afar, and his own stress dissolves when you start to ramble about how much you miss him. 💕

Karl Heisenberg

It's cute that you think you're leaving him behind.

You two are a team, did you seriously expect that he'd be alright with you leaving? With you trying to go to a campus where he can't get to you if something goes wrong?

Heisenberg reacts like an upset pet or a clingy child when it comes to the idea of you leaving for college. He knows it's not forever, and he knows you're coming back--that's not his problem.

His problem is the fact that you're leaving at all.

You two are partners-- a perfect match. He's had this idea in his head ever since you both became a couple that the two of you would hardly ever be apart. Now that you're going to be out of his sight for longer than a week? It's preemptively triggering separation anxiety. He's not happy.

He genuinely tries to get you to take exclusively online courses if you aren't already, just so that you stay with him.

He's so consumed by the concept that you'll be away from him that it takes a while for it to click that, uh, this attitude of his? Not helpful.

You're twice as stressed as you were before, and now you're also angry at Heisenberg for pulling all of this childish nonsense. You love him, but he's being an incredibly insensitive dumbass, and you've got to call him on it.

Phones exist. Skype exists. Hell, the two of you can write letters to each other if you want. It's not like he won't ever get to talk to you! All he's doing is adding to your stress and making you feel worse about a big decision that you've already made, and that's not okay! If he's supposed to be your "perfect match", why isn't he being more supportive?

That snaps him right out of it. While Karl still sulks a bit, he puts on his big boy pants and gives you a proper apology.

Once he's got his head on straight, he's very good at helping you through your worries. Heisenberg will massage your shoulders, talk you through any paperwork you might be having trouble with, and helps you triple check your to-do list. He loves you, and always wants to help, but sometimes he gets carried away.

Just...promise to visit often, alright? He's gonna miss you. 💕

Bela Dimitrescu

Jealous. As. Hell.

She doesn't openly make it obvious, but you know her. You know Bela's little mannerisms and tells, and it's obvious to you that the eldest daughter of the Dimitrescu clan wants to go to college along with you. Unfortunately, due to the fact that she can't easily travel, she can't come along.

It's... not a great situation, considering you're so stressed. You're worried about admissions, being accepted into the classes you need, your curriculum, but Bela doesn't try to comfort you. Instead, she sulks in the background.

Eventually, this blows up between the both of you. You're upset and angry that Bela isn't being more supportive, and Bela is angry that you're the one who gets such an incredible opportunity to leave and explore the world while she's stuck in Dimitrescu Castle.

Why are you stressed? It's an amazing opportunity, it doesn't make sense that you're so worried!

...She's so harsh about it that you might start crying, at which point Bela realizes that she might have fucked up. The last thing she wants to do is hurt your feelings, so she'll pull you into a hug and immediately babble apologies until she's blue in the face.

Once you calm down, you're going to have to explain that just because it looks and sounds fun, College does have challenges of its own. The idea that you get to go learn all sorts of things isn't sunshine and roses--there's a lot of pressure to do well.

Bela is a little quiet after that, but you notice she's much more supportive. She starts to treat your worries more seriously, and even will go to Alcina to try to get some advice on how to help you.

She's still a little envious, but she hides it better now. The last thing that Bela wants to do is stress you out right before you leave. She loves you, and wants your last memories before you go to be positive and something happy that you can look back on when you're away.

Cassandra Dimitrescu

Thrilled for you!

College sounds so exciting! She honestly desperately wants to go with you, but due to the composition of her body, she can't exactly leave the Castle.

She winds up asking you all sorts of questions, following you through the hallways, wondering how you feel about leaving to a brand new place, with brand new people, all of the classes you're going to take....

...It really doesn't help with the anxiety. Cassandra won't leave you alone, and is so fixated on asking you all these questions that it actually makes you worry about things that you hadn't even considered before. What if you hate your Major? What if your professors turn out to be terrible?

Instead of your cheerful responses from before, you start to shut down at all of the questions. Cassandra quickly cues into the fact that something is wrong, and when she asks, all of your worries come pouring out.

Immediately, she pulls you into a hug and apologizes. She didn't mean to stress you out at all, she just wanted to share the experience with you!

Once the two of you clear the air, though? She cracks her knuckles and goes full bookworm.

Cassandra's...not great at staying focused, but she does have a few tips and tricks that she shares with you if it helps.

She also is really great at finding resources that might help you out. Despite her issues focusing on anything other than non-fiction, she does know her way around a library, and will pull any and all reference texts about what you might be studying while you're away.

By the time you're ready to leave Castle Dimitrescu, you've got two years worth of knowledge packed into your head, an optimally organized suitcase, and a lingering kiss from your girlfriend that makes it hard to worry about anything else 💕💕💕

Daniela Dimitrescu

...doesn't handle it well at all.

Daniela doesn't want you to leave. It doesn't matter the situation, it doesn't matter what the context is, you're her partner in crime and she refuses to let you go.

In fact, she tries to sabotage your efforts to leave.

It starts small. Your suitcases mysteriously unpack themselves in the middle of the night. Important papers keep going missing, and you have to reprint a lot of documentation. Your phone disappears for hours at a time.

When all you do is grumble and fix what she's messed with, she gets angrier and escalates. Your laptop goes missing. Your textbooks disappear. You start to question where you left your keys, because they seem to move around the room without your input.

Meanwhile, Daniela is being passive aggressive any time you bring up college. She refuses to talk about it at all with you, and acts like you're not even leaving.

It all comes to a head one day when you burst into tears from all the added stress. This is so, so important to you, and not only are you not getting any help or comfort from your partner, but all of your stuff is going missing!

Daniela immediately feels terrible. As much as she didn't want you to go, the last thing she ever wanted to do was make you cry.

She's not super emotionally mature, so while she comforts you, she has a group of flies separate from the rest and bring back all of your things. You figure it out an call her on it, but she actually looks on the verge of tears herself as she explains to you why she did it. She's so, so sorry, but she doesn't want you to go! She loves you!

You two have a long talk about why this isn't cute, funny or acceptable, no matter her feelings. You might even bring Alcina in on it, just in case. Still, the two of you do work through it, and while Daniela isn't the best with helping with general prep, puts 100% into keeping your mood high.

With time, she finds herself... well not okay with it, but she can now tolerate the idea. As long as you talk to her every day!

(And yes, she calls you multiple times a day when you're gone. Alcina eventually caves and gets her a phone, just so she isn't constantly using the line that Mother Miranda uses to check up on the Castle. The two of you talk so often you barely even have time to miss her💕)

[elenamiria]

A False Marriage

Obi-Wan Kenobi x Reader

Rating: PG-13 Summary: On a recon mission you and Obi-Wan must pretend to be a married couple. This brings feelings to light that neither of you realized were there. Written for @sugared-strawberrys who was a winner of my 600 follower giveaway! I hope you enjoy this, I absolutely loved writing it. It turned out really soft and I hope you don't mind 🥰 Also I really can’t help myself with the tropes in this one haha oops. And this is the inspiration for the dress reader wears in this. Word Count: 3.2k Warnings: Tension, kissing, mentions of sexual situations, fem reader, talks about braided hair and putting hair in an updo Tags: @crazycatladyjenga @oneirnaut , @a-dorin , @blxwjobsforclones, @lynnie51 @katrynec @mistermiraclee​ @theelvenvalkyrie​ , @ifvckedurmom​ Masterlist & Obi-Wan Kenobi Masterlist

You had tried to hide the terse look on your face as you sat next to Obi-Wan on your transport to a high class gala on Alderaan for your mission, but unfortunately you were never good at holding you expressions in check. You would have felt much more comfortable in your A-wing than the civilian ship you and your mission partner were travelling in. 

A short sigh left your mouth as you tried not to worry yourself about the mission, after all there wasn't much you could do to change your circumstances. Your brief noise caught the attention of Obi-Wan and he tilted his head towards you, taking in your tense features. A small smile covered his lips as he quipped, "Come now, it's not as if you actually had to marry me."

You rolled your eyes at his statement and shot a facetious glare his way, "Not everything is about you Master Kenobi."

Settling back into your seat you allowed your eyes to slide to the window in front of you watching space pass by. Though you could certainly see why he would think your little huff was directed at him considering you had been less than pleased at your mission partner when in the mission debrief. It wasn't that you lacked respect for the Jedi General in fact you held him in the highest regard. However, your perfectionist nature and the fact that Obi-Wan seemed to be naturally gifted in most things he did led to a fiercely competitive friendship through the both of your lives. In truth you weren't really upset that you had been paired with him, the frustration stemmed mainly from within and your worry that you would make a fool of yourself in front of the esteemed Jedi next to you. 

Apparently you missed his reply, lost in your own thoughts, and you were startled from your racing thoughts by a call of your name. Turning abruptly you met his genuinely concerned gaze and you blinked blankly at him for a second until he prompted, "Are you are alright?"

This time your huff was directed towards him and you narrowed your eyes in annoyance, this was just like him to question you like that. You knew he was truly just wanting to ensure there was nothing wrong but the part of your brain that enjoyed pushing his buttons seemed to take over as you muttered, "Fine. Just thinking about how I have to pretend that I, your wife, let you keep your hair like that."

Obi-Wan's mouth parted and a rather indignant noise flew from him before he glared back at you, one hand subconsciously tugging at the end of his long locks, "Yes, well at least you don't have to deal with a partner who's recon missions tend to go as well as falling into a sarlacc pit goes."

An audible gasp flew from you as you spun towards him, your face heating in anger, and you spit out, "You're lucky I don't have my lightsaber on me Kenobi!" A smirk covered his lips and you knew whatever was coming next would only serve to further provoke you. Your thoughts were proven absolutely correct as Obi-Wan smugly questioned, "I think rather it's you who's lucky that your weapon isn't on you as we both know how embarrassing it would be for me to best you after that little quip."

Having known Obi-Wan for so long you could pretty easily predict what was going to come out of his mouth and this time you were ready. You let out a short laugh before retorting, "I'd only hope that you'd grant me the small mercy of knocking me out so I don't have to listen to you prattle on anymore." "My dear it seems that would be the most beneficial option for both of us." Came Kenobi's smooth reply. Crossing your arms and sinking further down into your seat you snapped back a short 'fine' and allowed the space craft to fall into silence. It remained that way for majority of the few hours left in flight, the quiet only disturbed by the occasional question as you went over the mission plans again. The mission in question was to find out if a high ranking Alderaan official was secretly pushing a separatist agenda - something that Bail Organa's wife had become suspicious of. You had questioned why this wasn't simply a solo mission and much to your displeasure had found out that this man had a penchant for married women it seemed, thus here the two of you were.

Thanks to your rigorous study of the mission details it didn't seem all that long until you were arriving on Alderaan and being escorted to your room within the royal palace. When you arrived you barely had time to take in your surroundings before Obi-Wan was softly muttering that he would get ready first and you could make yourself comfortable. He quickly retreated to the bathroom of the luxurious accommodations and you took a moment to take a look around. Though the room was grand it was decorated minimally, not that it mattered when a large window gave a stunning view of the snowy topped mountains.  

 You took a long breath to soak in the beauty that you didn't often get to see within the bustling confines of the city before turning and setting your bags down. One bag was dedicated solely to the gown you were supposed to wear tonight - a truly impressive dress that made you feel like royalty and at the same time completely out of your element. Pulling it gently out of the bag you laid it across the couch, ensuring there were minimal wrinkles. Satisfied you let your eyes roam the room and then you settled your gaze on the bed in the room. Blinking for a few seconds your head quickly turned to look around the rest of the room as if you could will a second bed into existence.  A deep exhale left your mouth as you pinched the bridge of your nose already deciding that you would offer to let Obi-Wan take the bed, after all you had been the one to pick a fight with him on the ship, it seemed the least you could do. 

Settling on the couch next to your dress you pulled out a small mirror and began to undo the tight braids your hair was in to hopefully save you some time in the bathroom. It wasn't often that you wore your hair down and your could feel your scalp thanking you as you lightly massaged any sore spots. You weren't sure how much time had passed, once again allowing your thoughts and worries about the mission consume your thoughts despite your best efforts to simply relax, and you startled slightly when the refresher door slid open. Obi-Wan strolled out dressed in a similar style to Bail Organa and you wondered if perhaps the senator hadn't lent him some of his clothing. Though all thoughts flew from your head as he passed the window and the sun caught on his cheekbones, highlighting his skin and lighting up his brilliant blue eyes. You could have sworn time slowed down as he offered you a gentle smile and your breath caught in your throat as you tried to regain some of your sense. It was only after a few moments that you noticed he had trimmed his hair, where the curls had fallen just past his shoulders they now just brushed them. Had he done that because of your snarky statement? Your brow furrowed slightly as you questioned why you were so caught up in his appearance in the first place and the moment was broken by your gaze snapping to the floor. 

Obi-Wan's gaze lingered on you, a slight frown covering his face as he wondered if he had somehow upset you when you quickly gathered your belongings and practically fled into the bathroom. A small noise distracted him from your retreating form and he bent down to pick up the fake engagement and wedding rings you had been given to wear. Standing he turned to call out to you but as the refresher door slid shut he simply held onto them, figuring he could give you them before the two of you left for the gala.

Staring into the mirror you sighed deeply, shaking your head. The only reason you were distracted by Obi-Wan's appearance was because of your nerves about the mission you had decided. Nothing more and nothing less. You had certainly never looked at Obi-Wan in that light before - though there were all the times when you found yourself captivated by his grace in combat and how his......no you definitely had never seen him like this before.  

Focusing back to the task at hand you applied your makeup and finished putting your hair into a simple updo, one that you had done before and that was elegant and yet functional at keeping your hair out of your face. And then came the dress. You disrobed rather quickly, folding your clothes into a neat pile, and stepped into the dress. Pulling it on you could admit that it truly was a beautiful dress though as your arms slid into the small off the shoulder sleeves you could tell that there was no practicality in the dress. Your arms seemed to fit into the sleeves a bit snugly and thus your movement was quite severely limited, an issue you found when attempting to reach back and lace the back of the dress. After several futile attempts you hung your head in defeat, taking a deep breath before calling out for your Jedi partner. You waited several seconds before calling out again, this time hearing several hurried footsteps before you heard your name come from the opposite side of the door. Sighing you gave in and as quietly as you could manage (while still ensuring he could hear you) asked, "Will you please come help me?"

The door slid open and you stubbornly stared at the counter as your face heated in embarrassment, "I just- I can't get the laces and I'm not really even sure how they're supposed to go. Please don't laugh, I know I look completely ridiculous and I-"

You were cut off by a soft, calming call of your name and then you felt Obi-Wan's fingers brush at your back, gathering the laces. His gentle tone caught you off guard yet again and you stilled, chancing a glance in the mirror. Blue eyes caught yours and the serious look on his face had you freezing where you stood. Deftly he laced up the back, tugging and pulling as lightly as he could, only breaking eye contact for a few moments at a time. His sureness had you feeling more calm by the second and when he finished, tucking the laces in between the layers of your dress, his gentle smile brought you back to reality. Turning your face heated for an entirely different reason as you realized how close you were, gaze dropping to the floor again. 

A warm hand captured your left hand and gently raised it, calloused fingers brushing softly over yours. Looking up at him in confusion you were met with a mischievous grin and his opposite hand procured the rings you were supposed to be wearing. You let out a small laugh as you relaxed completely in his grip, "Looks like I'm not getting out of this marriage am I Obi-Wan?"

"Most certainly not my dear." A smile crossed your face as he slid the rings onto your finger delicately. Your other hand rose to run through the hair at the nape of his neck as you questioned, "Did you cut your hair for me?"

General Kenobi tensed slightly at your question and as your eyes met his a light pink dusted his cheeks. That was answer enough for you and an airy laugh fell from your lips, "Thank you darling, it looks wonderful."

Purposefully you drawled out the pet name in an attempt at his accent. There was a pause and the Obi-Wan let out an equally as bright laugh before he squeezed your hand, "Well I'm glad you think so. However, I do believe it is time for us to head to the gala."

As if sensing your nerves about to spike Obi spoke again in a teasing lilt, "And you don't look ridiculous, you truly look absolutely ravishing."

With that he swept out of the room, leaving you to pick your jaw up off of the floor and your hands smoothed down your dress before you followed after him - an air of confidence overtaking you.

The two of you arrived shortly after the gala had began, a steady flow of officials and ambassadors filling the room. Swallowing you took a step closer to Obi-Wan and a comforting hand met your lower back. Sharp eyes scanned the room as the two of you searched for the target. 

"I don't see him." You said lowly and Obi-Wan nodded in agreement, "Nor I. While we wait would your prefer to mingle with others, dance or should we make ourselves known at the bar?"

You opted for the last option, as it offered a solid vantage point of everyone entering and having a small drink never hurt. Courteously Obi-Wan guided you through the crowds and even pulled out your seat for you, ensuring you were sat comfortably before taking his own seat next to you. Ordering quickly your partner slid around on the stool to face outwards and you turned to face him, your thighs brushing together lightly. 

The contact had you taking a healthy swallow of your drink once it arrived and then you distracted yourself by keeping an eye out on the entrance. A warm palm settled on your knee and a shock shot up your spine causing you to nearly choke on your drink. Glancing at Obi-Wan you noticed his eyes trailing someone. A look towards his eyeline confirmed that he had located the target, who in a stroke of good fortune was heading directly towards the bar. Deciding it would be best to play up your false marriage you softly called out for Obi-Wan's attention, which was promptly given. You inhaled deeply as you made eye contact and whispered, "Do you trust me?"

Obi's eyes searched yours as he nodded and surely stated 'of course'. That gave you the courage to lean forwards, left hand coming up to cup his face, and connect your lips together. The Jedi jolted and froze for a split-second before responding to the kiss more eagerly than you had anticipated. His lips were soft and warm, moving in tandem with yours, and when his hand slid up to your thigh a small nip on your lower lip had you melting into him. In the moment everything faded away - the mission, the crowd surrounding you, the cacophony of sound - it was only you and him, that's all that mattered. His other hand rose to cup your hand on the side of his face and he gave it a soft squeeze as he parted from you, a warmth gleaming in his eyes that hadn't been there before. 

You felt your face heating as he gave you a sparkling smile, you pulled back slightly but he kept your hand clasped in his. A brush of his lips against the tips of his fingers sparked something in your lower stomach and you had to suppress a gasp as he then pressed a kiss to your palm, lips trailing to the pulse point on your wrist. As his lips made contact you swore you forgot how to breath, his cerulean eyes locked with yours as your lips parted in a silent exhale. With that gentle touch he slowly rose, brushed a stray hair off of your cheek, and bent to your level. Beard tickling at your cheek he whispered to you, "He's directly behind you, I think we peaked his interest darling." 

Standing up to his full height again he made it clear that he would be right back before pressing a kiss to your forehead, seemingly leaving you alone with the target, your heart racing from the intimate touches. You knew that he wasn't going far, the banquet hall in the palace had secret eavesdropping locations hidden behind screens and you knew he would be retreating to one of those. 

Spinning to face the bar again you caught the bartenders attention to order another drink and a gruff voice spoke up from next to you that he would be paying for your drink. A false smile coated your face as you turned to thank him and you made sure to show off the ring on your left hand as you finished the first drink. As the man gave you a smug smile you knew you had him exactly where you wanted him.

He turned out to be a ridiculously easy mark, caring more about impressing a stranger who he thought he could fuck than keeping his mouth shut about his views. It was only after you got the information you needed to relay to Senator Organa that Obi-Wan swooped back in. His arm sliding around your waist and he pulled you close to him had the stranger grumbling as the two of you excused yourselves. To keep up appearances you made your way around the ballroom once before sneaking out. You weren't going to lie the two drinks had you speaking a bit more freely than normal which led to several bouts of unrestrained laughter from the two of you as you made your way back to your quarters, Obi-Wan’s arm never leaving the comfortable way he had it wrapped around your waist. 

When you reached the doors Obi-Wan hesitated and you tilted your head at him in confusion. There was a pause before he spoke, "I know throughout our years we've both strived to best each other and given that you are a fierce competitor I wouldn't have it any other way. However, I enjoyed tonight and how easy it was with you."

You simply smiled and entwined your hands, pulling him into your quarters for the night. Once the door slid shut you pulled him into another soft kiss, this time it was short and sweet, leaving a tender smile on both of your faces. 

It seemed there were many unspoken things left to be said but for tonight as the two of you lay on opposite sides of the bed (both of you had refused to let the other sleep on the couch) nothing else needed to be said. It wasn't long before you had rolled over and scooted close to the center with Obi-Wan following shortly after. As he wrapped you up in a cozy embrace you nuzzled into his chest, sleep nearly overtaking you but you couldn't let him go to sleep without a teasing reminder of, "I hope you know this won't make me go easy on you when we spar. I'll still have no problem beating you." A chuckle rumbled in Obi-Wan's chest as he muttered something that suspiciously sounded like 'you can certainly try'.

[hee4won]

hate(d) | nishimura riki x reader

requested by @onionhaseyeo i’m so sorry if this isn’t what you wanted but for some reason i got super excited

a/n: this is my first time writing a fic(?) i guess it could be considered.. i just had an idea i liked for the request and it felt more like a fic than a headcanon :] i hope it’s not too bad !

word count: 2.1k

warnings: probably some grammatical errors, other than that none. (lowercase intended)

tags: e2l, slight angst, slight fluff

you hate nishimura riki. when you tell others how you feel about him they always have the same unoriginal response, “hate is such a strong word.” and that, is exactly why you chose it. 

now, in order to really understand why your hatred runs so deep, let’s get into the Three W’s! WHY do you hate him so much? he stole your best friend, she ended up developing feelings for him and ghosting you, she moved away, he never apologized for it. WHEN did you realize nishimura riki was the worst thing to ever happen to you? 7th grade, it’s always 7th grade. WHERE did the beginning of the end commence? the cafeteria, your friend decided to spill her guts out in front of the whole lunch table, only to be humiliated not long after. 

there you sat, glaring at the back of riki’s head. anyone from a mile away could sense your distaste when it came to him. truth be told, no one could understand why, and you never cared to explain. you figured the situation between the two of you or - just you and an unknowing boy -  was personal and should be kept private. you were really good at keeping it a secret too, so good that riki himself couldn’t pinpoint the issue you had with him. 

for the most part you did your best to avoid him, whether it be physically or when he was brought up in conversation between classmates. ni-ki, as people on good terms with him would address him, was a really friendly student. he didn’t pick fights, kept his teasing to a minimum, and somehow got good grades despite sleeping in and skipping classes. 

going to school knowing his sweet, smiling face would be one of the first things you would see in the morning was what kept you in bed during first period. just the idea of him was revolting, and you simply weren’t strong enough to hold your ground right after waking up.

that was until your first period teacher emailed you letting you know a group project was coming up and it counted as 60% of your overall grade. all you could do was send a friendly reply, close the laptop, and scream into your pillow. you were going to be seeing nishimura riki for the first time in almost a month. which you considered to be the best month of your life.

you were alert all morning, barely getting any sleep the night before from how nervous you were. it actually wasn’t as bad as you thought. you were late, which meant everyone already picked who they were going to group with. and, to your luck, riki was nowhere to be foun-

*bump*

“oh my gosh, i am so sorry. . . y/n?” sigh, of course it had to be him. you flashed a limp smile and hurried over to an empty seat. you noticed his hand go forward then drop down to his side, almost like he was trying to bring you back. “oh! ni-ki,” even the teacher knows his nickname? how wonderful. “what perfect timing, you and y/n will be partners for the project, i’ll send the rubric out this afternoon. class dismissed!”

your legs were like jelly, since when did you become this way? sure, you hate him but. . . not being able to move? it was different, it was new. riki noticed the look of confusion on your face and cautiously made his way over to you once all the other students cleared the classroom. “hey, y/n. i haven’t seen you in a while, have you been doing alright?” why on earth was he concerned about you? so shameless.

“yeah, i’m fine, thanks,” you glared at him while standing up and purposefully bumping into his shoulder. bad move. your knees gave out right then, luckily, riki held onto you before you could hit the cold floor. you sighed in defeat, today just wasn’t your day, and mister nishimura just wasn’t the person you wanted to be this close to.

“do you need something? or is there another reason you won’t let go of my arm,” every word had a hint of poison mixed in it. riki muttered a small apology and quickly released you. “i just wanted to let you know that we can work on the project at my place, only if you want,” he gave a boxy closed-mouth smile, almost as if he was trying to act cute. disgusting.

“whatever, give me your address and i’ll come by at 4.” and with that, you two went your separate ways.

after school

as you made your way to riki’s house, you were running over every possible scenario that could occur. you wanted to avoid arguing, only because you took your grades very seriously. but does he? you couldn’t help but feel nervous and slightly jittery as you got closer to his front steps. oh! the door is open. but. . . no riki?

you called out for him a couple times until hearing laughter and the crunching of chips coming down from the second floor. of course, he’s playing the game. trudging up the stairs you wiped off your sweaty palms, mentally preparing yourself before inviting yourself into his room.

“sunghoon, shut up! it’s not even like that, you’re so weird,” he was so loud. “jake, you too! as if you haven’t been trying to swoon that girl in your third period for the past two months now. haha!” well, boys will be boys.

you open the door and riki notices immediately. he throws his headset and controller down to the floor. “y/n, you scared me,” he was almost out of breath. “oh my bad, i called out for you but you didn’t hear me so. . .” you fiddled with your fingers awkwardly. riki muttered a quick, “it’s okay” and gestured for you to take a seat on his bed.

picking up his headset, he told the cheeky upper-class boys that he would talk to them later. grabbing his supplies and computer, he took a seat next to you. you shifted away from him a little, not comfortable with the closeness between the two of you. he didn’t seem to notice, that or he just didn’t care.

“okay, so, have you already looked over the rubric?” crickets. “helloo, earth to y/n! have you checked the rubric yet?” “OH! yes, i have, ha,” you gave a quick reply, trying to pretend the awkward moment of you staring at him never happened.

ha? are you insane? you were nervous yes, and you thought it was because of the bad terms you two were on but. . . this nervousness felt a bit different.

“i also wrote up a quick outline during lunch,” you took the paper out of your bag and moved to hand it to him. “ooh nice, you’re such a scholar,” you gave him a lighthearted “shut up” before looking back at your laptop.

did he feel that? your fingers touched. they did touch, right? you can’t be imagining all of this. Y/N. WHAT ARE YOU DOING? YOU HATE HIM, REMEMBER?

“uh, y/n? why do you look like you’ve been holding in a wet fart for the past three minutes?” he was being playful while also holding genuine concern because of your recent actions. your jaw drops, you were always bad at keeping a poker face. but you knew you had to go back to your cold state, there was no way you were going to finish the project by gawking at him. he has such pretty lips by the way, how did you not notice sooner?

it had been a few hours since you guys started working on the project. you checked the time, 8:00 pm. “hey, riki,” you began with a small yawn. “y/n, you know you can call me ni-ki, right? that’s what all my friends call me,” his eyes suddenly widened noticing your discomfort. “wait, i mean. . . only if you want to!”

you cleared your throat and just asked for the bathroom. once inside and closing the door behind you, you felt the need to cry. sob, even. what is going on? why do you feel so bad for being around him? are you a traitor? is it wrong to be laughing and giggling like the two of you are besties?

you turned the water on, hoping it would drown out the sound of your muffled cries. unfortunately, you have some awfully loud sniffles. riki came running to where you were and knocked on the door. he spoke softly, “y/n? are you okay? can i come in?” what was the point in saying no? it is his house, and maybe if you told him. . . you’d feel better.

as you opened the door and looked up at him, the look of worry on his face made your heart ache. gosh, why do you care about him so much? he looked at your tear stained face and slowly reached out his hand, giving you a look that pleaded for your approval. you pass a small nod, and almost sank into the warmth of his hand on your cheek. he pulled you in for a hug as you cried for a little while longer. “do you wanna talk about it?”

here it was, here was the chance to let him know what you’ve been wanting to since 7th grade. you took a moment to steady your breathing and gather courage to look him in the eyes. you told him everything, from the beginning of 7th grade, to the day it all happened, all the way to where the two of you stood now.

he just sat there, probably trying to process everything you had randomly dumped on him. you were about to apologize and pack your things, but for some odd reason, he smiled? “ni-ki? what’s so funny? i was being serious,” his smile only grew bigger, “no i know, i just find it so funny how you had so much agaisnt me meanwhile i just wanted you to like me.”

he?? wanted you to like him??? hmmm. “what do you mean. . . wanted me to like you?” you were really curious, “i’ve had a crush on you since 7th grade, that’s why i rejected your friend later on. i never knew it would hurt you in the process, and for that i am sorry. very sorry.” you let out a small chuckle, “it’s not your fault, really. now that i’m older i think i was only mad that you two didn’t end up together because i liked you too. i just couldn’t live with myself for liking the same boy my best friend liked. it’s stupid, i know.”

riki reached out for your hand, which you obviously let him have. “you’re a good friend.” he flashed you a sweet and caring smile. you let out a sigh of relief, it felt like a weight had been lifted off your shoulders. all this time you had been pushing for yourself to hate him, while it was all just a plot to get rid of your feelings for him. crazy.

it was 11:00 pm.

you and riki had already finished the project and were laying on his floor. the both of you just staring at the ceiling and stealing glances at each other. what lovesick little kids.

after noticing the time, you hopped up and told him you really needed to go. he gave you a small pout with puppy eyes trying to get you to stay, and of course, it was hard but you’d rather leave now and see him later than get grounded and not see him for another month. “i can just text you, don’t make that face.”

he escorted you down the stairs, both of you moving discreetly, careful not to wake the boy’s parents. he opened the door for you and you turned around, gazing at him. “what are you thinking?” he asked with a tired smile on his face and small pieces of fluffy hair sticking up in every direction. you gave a shy smile and pecked his lips. he was very surprised, but also very happy.

“nothing.” you said, holding a cheeky grin in an attempt to hide your shyness. “wow, just to think that you hate my guts,” riki poked fun at you.

“hm, hate is such a strong word.”

“what would you call it then?”

“i would say. . . i hate(d) you. past tense.”

the two of you just laughed, both of you yawning shortly after.

“goodnight, mr. ni-ki.”

“goodnight, y/n.”

and with that, the two of you went your separate ways. but this time, with mutual feelings.

oh and btw, the project got you guys an A+ ;).

[jilytho]

if only in my dreams

Lily has been having some dreams about James but of course that in no way means she has any feelings for him of any kind

Read below or on AO3 or FFNT

The dreams started about a month into October of Seventh Year. They started slow at first and innocent enough, fun little dreams of the Marauders and Lily’s friends all sat near the fire playing Exploding Snap or chatting at dinner. Slowly, however, they started to shift. Instead of it being all of their friends together, they began to focus in on just her and James. Sometimes they were outlandish and artificial the way dreams could be, like the one where she was a star quidditch player and was playing his team but all of the other teammates were octopuses, or the one where Paul McCartney was their Transfiguration Professor. Fun and ridiculous and clearly too dreamlike to be of any real consequence to her but certainly notable. Yet other times they were so completely and utterly simplistic, domestic even. Calm and casual, just them sitting and laughing and holding hands. Everytime one of those occurred, Lily would wake up feeling content, at peace almost. Then the realization set in and the contentment quickly turned to horror. Those were the scariest dreams of all.

After the first few she was able to write them off as a coincidence, simply neurons firing in her brain as a way of dealing with spending so much time with him during the day as co-heads. Especially as they became friends over those first few months, it was really simple and logical, just her brain dealing with him being so present in her life and working it out as she slept. Considering it’d been years of them fighting and screaming, the sudden shift to friendship and laughing was obviously a lot to process.

The dreams didn’t occur every single night, at least not at first, more like once or twice a week at max. Just enough for her to spend some time thinking about them during a boring Ancient Runes class and processing them, but certainly not enough to cause any real worry or concern over her well being.

Even when they increased in frequency, from twice a week to six times a week plus that one time she zoned out and started daydreaming during History of Magic (which didn’t really count because he was sitting next to her and smelled so good of course it was going to leech into her dreams). It wasn’t hard to rationalize those either. It was completely logical that she’d daydream about lying on the Quidditch pitch alongside James, looking up at the stars together, hands intertwined, because after all they had stood near each other in Astronomy that day and he had pointed out Venus’s moons to her. It was natural, truly.

And it wasn’t difficult at all to make the connections between that day at lunch when she’d almost tripped but he’d caught her with a strong arm wrapped around her waist with that evening, when she had dreamt that same arm was wrapped around her tightly as she sat in front of him on the back of his broomstick as they flew over the school.

They were just dreams. Harmless imaginings of the imagination and the kind of stuff that was covered in day one of Petunia’s psychology courses at muggle Uni. Easily explainable and not in anyway shape or form telling of any real emotions she’d possibly be having.

Except that considering how simple and natural some of the dreams felt, she occasionally started mixing up what had happened between dream James and Lily and real life James and Lily. Was it real James or dream James that had brushed her hand while passing a quill in Transfiguration and set a wild blaze of electricity firing all up and down her arm? Did she actually hear real James’s breath hitch when she had brushed against him while reaching for the bottle of scalamander eyelashes during potions? Was it real James or dream James that she had stood so close to, close enough to feel his chest rising and falling against her as they hid from Filch in a cupboard?

It shouldn’t have been much of a surprise (but of course it still was) when the dreams turned a little more… intimate. When instead of dreaming of lunch in the Great Hall, the scene began to shift to lunch in the Three Broomsticks, just the two of them, followed by hand holding through the streets of Hogsmeade.

Friday night escalated things to nightmare level. Lily had been studying in the common room with Dorcas when the team returned from practice, led by James. Sweaty, grass stained, hair mussed, quidditch gear wearing, James. Lily felt her throat tighten and heart accelerate. His eyes landed on her and instantly smirked, nudging Marlene to point them out before the pair of them headed straight towards her.

“Evans, Meadows,” Lily’s mouth was too dry to respond. She nodded weakly as Marlene flopped down next to her and looked at her strangely.

That image of him haunted her, snuck deep into her subconscious, permeated her thoughts and took root there to flood her dreams. Filled them with him, sweaty and red, but for a reason far different from quidditch, leaning over her, whispering into her ear while she gripped his shoulders and left scratches in a trail down his back.

She couldn’t meet his eye the next day at breakfast.

This process seemed to repeat for the next several weeks: notice something about James during her waking hours that her subconscious would latch onto for the evening, wake up embarrassed, flushed, unsatisfied, and try her hardest to ignore him and stop the cycle. She never succeeded.

The night that really ruined her was right after they’d been partnered in defense. When she’d struggled with the incantation and he’d placed his fingers overtop of hers to show the correct positioning. When she felt how strong and flexible his hand was, how warm and long and rough his calloused fingers were. She felt shivers up and down her neck as he breathed closely to her, smelled mint on his breath, smelled the warm musk that was just so James.

All night she twisted and turned in her sleep, feeling those fingers trace up and down her arms, down her chest, twisting and lapping around the valley of her breast, circling each bud, pushing lower and lower, carving out waves of electricity as they squeezed her hips until she could just feel his fingers circling her clit. She could feel the callouses, could see him smirking at her as he’d bring his head down to meet his fingers, following the same trail of his fingers with his mouth, leaving a series of kisses across her skin.

She’d woken in a tangle of sheets sticking to the sweat on her skin, his name on the edge of her lips.

It’d taken a long, ice cold shower, to clear her head successfully. She stood in the freezing water attempting to justify the dream as just a way for her subconscious to deal with the fact that her close friend was decidedly fit. She tried desperately to cling to the idea of the dreams being a symptom of teenage hormones. However, in spite of her most sincere attempts, it was becoming shockingly clear that the dreams were much more a symptom of her real, genuine feelings for James. Romantic feelings. Spurts of butterflies and rampaging elephants that flooded her heart when he smiled. The fact that he could make her feel so on edge with excitement and anticipation when she saw him coming yet also immediately comfortable and the ability to talk to him about anything.

But she missed her chance. He’d been into her before, sure, but that was long over now. He’d essentially told her as much back in September, when he asked for a ceasefire now that they were both Heads. He’d told her he had grown up and would stop asking her out and bothering her if they could be civil, wasn’t that admitting that he’d left any possible romantic feelings for her behind him? He was over her. He was over her and it wasn’t his problem that she’d just now begun to realize how very badly she wanted him, all of him. She’d just get past it too.

How she was going to possibly get over him when his every waking action filtered through her dreams each night was the real issue. Her fingers were beginning to go numb from the frigid water, nearly shaking as she reached to turn the water off.

She wrapped her towel around her tightly, sheltering her like armour as she met her reflection in the mirror. Cheeks still flushed.

“Get over it,” she whispered to herself. She’d avoid him. That was the best solution. The only way to remove him from her dreams was to remove him from her waking moments as well. It’d be hard to avoid him forever, but at the very least she couldn’t be alone with him. Groups would be safer.

XXX

The next several days were difficult. Filled with eyes flitting away, nodding answers to his questions that had clearly been asked to engage in a conversation, ducking into bathrooms as he came down the corridor, and in a moment of absolute desperation brought on when she saw him standing there waiting for her in the doorway after potions, clearly attempting to walk with her which was essentially an ambush, and she had no choice but to strike up a conversation with Slughorn on the merits of using crushed salamander spleens verses the ever controversial chopped spleens. He’d gone on for about six minutes before James had given up and moved on to lunch, Lily counted to thirty before cutting Slughorn off and dashing away.

In the end she lasted three days of almost complete avoidance. He found her in the library. She’d done her best at hiding, choosing to study in the dusty Arithmancy section that maximum one person and one ghost seemed to visit per year and the table needed a solid Scourgify charm before she was able to sit down. She’d made it through half of her Charms essay before his hands slammed down on the table.

“Lily, I need to talk to you.”

His voice was tense and without looking up she could envision his rigid shoulders and sharp jaw looming over her. Her grip tightened on her quill as she set her shoulders and took a breath.

“Little busy right now, can it wait?”

He scoffed and pulled back the chair opposite her. “You’ve been avoiding me.”

“Not avoiding,” she squeaked, sneaking a glance up to see his gaze locked in on her and quickly averted her eyes back down. “Just busy, very, very busy.”

She could feel the eye roll.

He reached out across the table and closed the textbook she’d been reading from with a thump, forcing her to meet his eyeline with a glare that he unflinchingly met with his own.

“You can’t prove anything,” she crossed her arms across her chest.

“The only proof I needed I got when you suddenly, desperately had to talk to Flitwick about the best technique for forging charms which we all know you mastered three years ago. Or when you needed to discuss that stupid Salamandar debate with Slughorn that was clearly boring even you stale.”

He stated it all dryly, matter of fact, leaving no room for question or debate. They sat there silently for 93 seconds (she counted) as James leaned back in his chair, a vision of casual confidence.

“Fine!” She broke first. “I’m avoiding you. Are you happy? Are we done here now?”

He barked out a laugh, dropping his hands onto the table and folding them together. “We’ll be done when you explain whatever it is I did that made being around me so awful when we were just getting to a place where I thought we were friends, or at the very least capable of being in the same room and having a civil conversation.”

“I think it's time I go.” She pushed all her stuff into her rucksack hastily, hearing an ink well shatter as she did, and practically running to the door. One of the only benefits of the Arithmancy section is that it at least had a fast exit route, away from the main drag of tables, up the side of the aisles. She could hear James scrambling out of his chair and running to catch up with her but she refused to look back, getting as close to running as she could without risking the wrath of Madam Pince.

She was so close to the exit, the taste of freedom on the tip of her tongue. If she could just get out of the library, she could go left out of view and hide in an alcove until he passed or gave up looking. From then it’d be a simple matter of hiding away in her dorm for the next two to six days before she felt capable of facing him. She was rounding the corner to the exit, nodding tightly to Pince, when she felt his fingers wrap around her wrist and yank her into the nearest aisle.

She stared longingly over her shoulder at the exit as it disappeared as James pulled her along, weaving through aisles. Past Charms, past their table in Arithmancy, straight through Potions, all the way deep into the Divination section where the dust on the books appeared to be older than Lily and James combined.

It was there he finally stopped. Pulling her to the center of the aisle and standing strong in front of her.

It was silent for a tic as she stood there counting the seconds, mentally hoping that if she stayed quiet long enough, James would give up and leave.

Instead he cleared his throat. The noise was jarring in the otherwise silent aisle and without thinking her head turned on its own accord away from the dusty tombs to meet his eyes instead. Big mistake. His eyes were positively smoldering, a storm of hazel and gold glaring down at her. She’d always loved his eyes.

“What?” she bit out, forcing herself to break eye contact and stare somewhere around his shoulder instead.

“Start talking, Evans.”

His shoulders looked solid, no way she could charge past them. The way his shirt was pulling taut across them made her wonder if they’d feel as solid as they appeared and how’d they feel on her hands if she dug her nails into them while she-

She ripped her eyes away from his shoulders and down to his shoes instead. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she muttered, studying his laces and fidgeting slightly.

He scoffed and brought his free hand to her chin to tilt her gaze up to meet his once more. There were the eyes again.

“It’s a little late for all that, Lily.” He spoke slowly and quietly, as if she was a young deer he was worried would scamper off. “Now talk to me or I swear to god I’ll learn Occlumency just to get a peek at what you’re thinking about up there.”

Well that was a horrifying thought. Her brain reeled through all the images he’d see if he had actually taken a peek, his body pressing hot up against her, the two of them sitting in a sunlit field, picking dandelions, him wiping away a butterbeer mustache off her top lip as they laughed in the Three Broomsticks, him winning the Quidditch Cup and picking her up to spin her around in front of everyone.

“There,” he whispered accusingly, “that blush all over you right now? You’re hiding something from me, Evans, and that ends right now.” The tone was soft but the words were strong, gaze remaining level with her own, eyes searching her own as if the answer was written within them.

“I’ve been having dreams,” she blurted out, too flustered to be aware of her words and instantly regretting that they had come out. Her insides shrank as she squirmed under his gaze, shifting her weight.

He held steady, keeping his hand still tight on her wrist, not allowing her to move more than a breath away.

“What kind of dreams?” Nothing had changed in his voice, still controlled and level.

“I don’t know!” she snapped out, voice far louder than his own, “the embarrassing kind, okay? Are we done?” She twisted her wrist out of his own, somewhat surprised when he allowed her to. She was free, a part of her knew she should run right now and make her grand escape but a much larger part wanted to see what James would say, do, now that the truth was coming out.

She could practically see his wheels turning, mentally piecing together her words with her actions and the ramifications of it all. He was being too quiet, taking too long, and the words were boiling up in her now, desperate to fill the silence.

“They’re just dreams, okay? They don’t actually mean anything, it’s really not that big of a deal even,” she insisted, repeating the words she had spent the last several weeks telling herself out loud for the first time.

“If they don’t mean anything, why are you still blushing like that? And why would I be avoiding me? And what kind of dreams are the embarrassing ones exactly?” His brow was furrowed and a hand was rooted in his hair.

“They’re just stupid and random and unrealistic,” she spluttered, feeling the blush reach down to her toes.

“So tell me about one!” He demanded, “what happened in the most recent one? Did I kill you or something?”

“Oh please you don’t get it at all, you buffoon.” The embarrassment quickly was turning into rage and the words were pouring out.. “You didn’t kill me, you kissed me. Okay? More than kissed me really. You happy now?”

James was decidedly not happy. His expression turned only more incredulous with each passing second as her words took effect on him. His left hand dropped from her wrist to join his right firmly rooted in his hair, pulling and twisting.

She stared at him expectantly, waiting for a response, a realization, a reaction, anything. But instead he just stood there. Dumbfounded or disgusted or downright confused.

The seconds ticked by and her discomfort level rose as each one passed. The rage faded back to embarrassment and formed tears pricking at the back of her eyes, blinking furiously and squeezing her nails into her palms to try and stop any from leaking out.

“Are you going to say anything or just stand there ripping out your hair?”

He continued to stare, unmoving.

“Goodbye, James,” she spat out, crossing her arms tightly across her chest and pushing straight through him.

She heard him splutter something and got about six steps ahead before hearing his thundering steps behind her catching up to her. She pushed ahead until she felt his hand grip her shoulder and turn her around again

There was a scream on the tip of her tongue as she was pulled around to face him. “What, Jam-”

Her exclamations were silenced as he pushed his lips down onto hers. She hesitated for a moment in shock before throwing her arm around his neck and pulling him against her, leaning up on her tiptoes and responding enthusiastically. His hand from her shoulder pushed up to caress her cheek, other hand pressing hard and unforgiving into her hip.

“Was it like that?” The words were a whisper, hot against her face, barely a breath of space between them. “In your dream, was it like that?”

She barely nodded before pulling his lips back down to meet hers.

It was harsh and unyielding and not the kind of first kiss she had ever imagined for them but was certainly something taken right out of her dreams. She felt his hand tilting her head, adjusting their angle to fit perfect against each other as his tongue reached out to meet hers. Hot and heady and unbelievably perfect.

She didn’t notice them turning until her back was pushed up against the shelf. Corners and spines of the dusty volumes pressing up against her barely registering when there was so much of him to feel up against her. His scent surrounding her entirely, permeating the air around her until all she could think, smell, feel was just him.

He pulled back again, still barely a centimeter away and clearly reluctant to do so. “Wait, wait,” he heaved, “what exactly about a dream like that is ‘unrealistic’?”

She stammered unintelligibly for a moment, head filled with fog and fist curling tighter in the fabric of his shirt to anchor herself and him next to each other, “I just meant that we were friends now and you didn’t want to be…. you know.”

He cocked an eyebrow inquisitively, “enlighten me.”

“With me! Romantically speaking!” Her cheeks burned again, and eyes flitted down to where her hand was twisting his shirt.

Until she heard laughter. Actual laughter. One quick look at his face confirmed it, James Potter was actually laughing at her.

“Dear God, Evans,” he brought his hand to caress her cheek, thumb tracing her lower lip. “Evans, if I ever, and I mean ever, say I don’t want to be with you ‘romantically speaking’ you might as well Avada me right then and there because that is clearly an imposter.”

He didn’t give her a second to respond, crashing his lips back down onto hers.

And then he was snogging her again, harder. This instantly shut down her brain, eliminating the potential to analyze the implications of what he had just said because of course there would be time for analysis later but right now, in this moment, there was no time for that. There was no time for that because James Potter was snogging her in the depths of the library and it was so much better than any dream she’d ever had. She had no idea how long they’d stood there snogging, hands pulling hair and bruising skin and leaving her so utterly weak in the knees that she became vehemently grateful for the support of his arm around her back and the shelf she was leaning on. Minutes, hours, days, years, until she was so out of breath that she was practically sighing against his lips as they both slowed down, exhausted but so unwilling to separate, lips still brushing as they breathed in and out.

Her eyes remained closed and she pressed their heads together, lips no more than a centimeter apart.

“Hey Evans?” He sighed out, kissing her again chastely.

She hummed in response, rubbing her nose against his lightly and pushing up for one of those chaste kisses of her own, feeling his glasses press into her nose.

“Go out with me?”

[wandering-travesty]

Call Me By Your Name

    You weren’t sleezy. That was just a word idiots used to try and pull you down to their level. Yes, your hair was slicked back. Yes, your eyeshadow was dark as the night. Yes, your suit jacket barely covered your chest. Yes, your nails were painted black and sharp as daggers. But, no, you weren’t sleezy. You were dressed for your job. What was your job? Well, that was a bit more complicated….

 “I need you to get close to him.” Erwin said coolly, stubble covered chin resting on his strong hands.

 “I’m sorry?” You asked, genuinely hoping you had too much wax lodged in your ear canals.

 “You heard him.” You met the glare of the midget standing behind your boss.

 “Okay, smartass, I did. But you can’t be serious, boss! He’s beyond dangerous. Shouldn’t someone like,” you gestured in Levi’s direction, “one of the Ackermans take care of this? I’m not discounting myself or anything, but fucking with a Yeager is basically a suicide mission.” You were actually shocked Erwin asked you to do something so important. More so, dangerous. You weren’t exaggerating when you said it was a death sentence. You’d lost enough comrades to know that.

 “Listen, he’s the key to taking down the Marlian Syndicate.” You knew that, but still, this seemed out of left field. “The Ackermans are strong, yes, but they lack a certain…”

 “They’re not ready to whore themselves out. Just say that, Smith.” You understood now. The Ackermans were cold blooded killers ready to strike at any moment. However, they were awkward and completely inept at things like lust and heated and frankly revolting rendezvous. That was how he wanted you to get information for him.

 Erwin wanted you to fuck the leader of the Marlian Syndicate.

 “I wouldn’t use that wording exactly, but your assumption is correct.” Levi couldn’t seem to meet your gaze, but Erwin continued to stare straight into your soul. He was the leader of La Peste Eldienne (The Eldian Plague) for a reason. Strong, debonair, charming, and slightly insane. He could down a beer in one swig, sip a martini all night long, or abstain from alcohol completely. Whatever he needed to do, he did. He murdered, sent the idiotic young and the hopeless old to their deaths just the same, and could absolutely wine and dine a stranger until their clothes practically flew off their body if it was for the cause. You needed to be like that. Especially at a time like this.

 “I’ll do it. And I’ll do it well.” You assured your boss and his partner. Yeah, this would be easy. You could go low as the scum you were about to completely fuck over. You had been climbing up the ranks as of late, so this would be easy as pie.

Before going on your little date: you made a mental note of the main players you would have to deal with. The list you had went something like this:

Porco Galliard: Complete idiot. All brawn, no brain. Basically a bouncer with a fancier jacket and a higher salary. No worries about him doing anything funny.

Pieck Finger: The sweet little thing they kept around for good reason. Part of you wished you had to deal with her instead. She was witty and had a surprising amount of control over the shipments of cocaine and ammunition that went on about the city. Her pretty face and calm demeanor hid her true genius. She was one of the more concerning figures at tonight’s gig, but also one of the one’s more willing to hear you out before killing you.

Colt Grice: Basically a smarter but weaker version of Galliard. He was really only part of the Syndicate to learn from the best and become a great mafioso one day. You had high hopes for him, despite yourself.

Bertholdt Hoover: A freakishly tall mix of the last three members of the gang. So sweaty and shaky he wasn’t allowed to handle guns under any circumstance. That told you all you needed to know about his threat level.

Annie Leonhardt: Tiny, quiet ball of rage and skill. Could murder you in an instant, but would only do so if ordered. Not a concern unless someone else found you out, or you didn’t like being glared at all night.

Reiner Braun: His personality changed with the passing minutes. Could be calm and almost kind, or could snap your neck like a twig in his giant ass hand. He was a wildcard, and a dangerous one. Though he was obsessed with following orders and being the perfect little soldier boy, so you didn’t need to worry about him if no one told him to start shooting.

Yelena: Even more freakishly tall than Hoover. Also freakishly obsessed with the gang leader and his “master plan”, whatever the hell that was. Maybe you would find out tonight. Anyways, she would only do anything if you threatened the boss in any way. If you did your job right, that wouldn’t be an issue.

Eren Yeager: Easily the most brash and idiotic member of the gang. His problem was that he was trigger happy. In this business, trigger happy meant dozens of dead innocents piled up on the club floor in an instant. You had to be careful around him. Unlike most of the others, he would kill you without thinking.

And the top dog. The man of the hour. The man you had to seduce:

Zeke Yeager: Think Erwin but with more wit and charm. Not to mention more of a sadistic mindset. His favorite game was cat and mouse, seeing how long it took before he had a good excuse to have someone drawn and quartered. His expertise was slow torture that the victim didn’t even really know was happening before the barrel of the gun was already pointed to their temple. And you had to fuck him so stupid he leaked confidential information.

 The only other issue with Zeke was his habit of sleeping around. Yes, he was a tramp by most standards. A harlot with exotic tastes. You had heard stories of him seducing women and men alike, and god only knew what they did once he succeeded. What that meant for you was he would be hard to impress.

 So, you were here to beat him at his own game. And if you were found out, his younger brother would most likely shoot you on the spot. That was, if one of the others did it first. Or even worse, Zeke decided to be a tried and true asshole and torture you to death. The options were endless, and you hated them all.

 So there you sat, ass perched on a bar stool, sipping on a gin rickey and waiting for your opportunity. The room smelled strongly of tobacco, rum, and cinnamon. At least you would die surrounded by what you loved, you thought, laughing grimly to yourself. Men and women danced to slow songs you faintly recognized. The air buzzed with haughty laughter and upper class small talk. You barely had any idea how to interact with high society shitheads as high and mighty as the ones Yeager surrounded himself with. You weren’t often sent out to jobs like this. You were like Levi, born in the slums and never taught how to properly behave. You knew what you had to, much like your knowledge of the goings on of La Peste Eldienne. You knew your gang traded drugs, ammunition, and whatever else was a hot commodity at the time, but nothing other than that. You were actually quite glad to know nothing, since that made you a pretty unimportant person to rival gangs. Not as many death threats and kidnapping attempts came your way, unlike the ones Erwin, Hange, and Levi got every day. You were quickly pulled out of your thoughts on the gang hierarchy.

 “Excuse me, miss. The boss wants to chat with ya’ real quick.” A man with greasy hair and green, catlike eyes softly gripped your shoulder. Considering what you knew of Galliard, you figured that grip wouldn’t be soft for much longer if you didn’t do as he suggested.

 “Oh, alright. Did he happen to mention why?” You were genuinely curious. Porco didn’t offer you any solid answer, but there was a reasonable explanation.

 Zeke wanted to get his rocks off. Parties could be interesting, with the right people, of course. The right people hadn’t happened to show up that night. You, on the other hand, seemed interesting. To be frank, you were gorgeous. Even from a distance, he could tell there was something behind your eyes that spelled trouble. He loved people like you. Vicious, cunning, witty, all hidden behind an uninterested and bored demeanor. Those were the people he wanted around him. The best examples were Pieck, and surprisingly, Levi. They seemed to be completely different people than the ones hiding behind their eyes, and Zeke loved to see how long it took to break them down. Well, he was a bit kinder to Pieck, but you and Ackerman got the rough treatment.

 “Zeke, what the hell’re you doin’?” Eren pulled him out of his rather disgusting thoughts of…things better left unsaid.

 “I’m going to talk to a woman, Eren. What does it seem like I’m doing?” Zeke had a sharp tongue and quick wit, which he didn’t spare even his brother from.

 “I get that, but why that one? She seems…shady t’me. I wouldn’t let ‘er get too close, y’know?”

 “Eren, please be rational.” Zeke held a palm out in front of Eren, as if to physically stop his train of thought. “You and Yelena will shoot at the first sign of danger, so inviting this lovely woman to join us for a harmless chat isn’t a danger in the slightest.” Zeke reassured his brother, neglecting to tell him his true intentions. He was sure that would just make him more upset and skittish, which was dangerous for everyone there.

 “’Kay, boss. Got the dame ya’ asked for.” Porco trudged to the brothers’ secluded table with you in tow. He had kept one hand on your shoulder and the other right above your ass. The two main reasons being: one, he didn’t want someone so seemingly important to escape his grip, and two, you had a nice ass.

 “Ah, thank you Galliard…you can let her go now.” He gave Porco a knowing smirk. He let you go immediately and walked away, cheeks slightly reddened. Zeke didn’t want someone else touching his new toy.

 “I’m sorry if this comes off as rude, but did you need something from me? That man made me leave my gin at the bar and I would like to finish it at some point.” Oh, Zeke was going to love you. You weren’t flighty or scared in the slightest. He knew you had seen some serious shit. Not to mention how you cared more about your alcohol than a dangerous mafia boss and his younger brother ordering you over to their table. You were attractive and relatable. What a catch.

 “My apologies, Galliard tends to be a bit, how do you say, brutish. Feel free to order something new and sit down with us.” He gave you a smile that told you it wasn’t a suggestion. This guy was already just as bad as everyone had told you. He hailed a waiter over to the table. You knew that wasn’t some kind gesture, rather a show of how much power he had over everyone there. His long, thick fingers and suave smile also showed you how easily swayed you could be by dashing looks and raw power.

 He held himself like a king but talked like a philosopher. At the same time, he was down to earth yet still slightly condescending. You never knew where you stood with him, and he liked it that way. His flaxen hair was parted down the middle, and unlike most of the men there along with yourself with their hair hardened with pomade, it was fluffy and moved as he gestured wildly when he spoke. He tended to talk with his hands, once again drawing attention to just how attractive they were. His face was indescribably beautiful. His eyes were like stormy oceans cascading with passion and intrigue. His lips looked soft and plush with a wonderful roseate hue. His beard was well groomed and framed his sharp jaw perfectly. His gold rimmed glasses had a habit of hiding his eyes when thrown into direct light, which often happened with how he talked with his whole body. The way he constantly made direct eye contact with you had you lost in a daze of desire and fear. Was this all some sick ploy to get you to slip up and get everyone you loved killed along with yourself? Or was he seriously that interested in you?

 Eren was quiet most of the time, unless Zeke spoke to him. He didn’t like you. You were too similar to Zeke for his tastes.

 “Say, Eren, could you pass me a smoke?”

 “Oh, so you do have vices. See, you never ordered a drink for yourself, so I assumed you were a man above pleasures of the flesh.” You flashed a toothy grin at him, signaling that it was just playful banter. You two were both rather good at that.

 “My dear, the more you get to know me, the better you will understand just how enthralled with earthly pleasures I am.” He winked, and it sent you to the moon with want. How could a man be so gorgeous, charming, dangerous, and sadistic all at the same time? And why did you have to deal with it? You needed him out of his right mind, but it seemed like that could never happen. Whether it came from alcohol, drugs, or sex. You planned to use a mixture of all three. As you continued your playful jabs and taunts at each other, you found your opportunity to seal the deal. One sniff of the white stuff and he was putty in your hands.

 “Now you know, Mr. Yeager, gin isn’t my only vice.” You kept your usual sly tone.

 “Oh really? That is quite the interesting thing to say.” He matched your energy perfectly. This was too good.

 “Have you ever happened to try, well, what do they call it these days? Well, I tend to call it blow. Snow, stardust, snort, sugar, crack, whichever you prefer, I suppose.” Oh, how brave of you to mention your own trade to your top competitor.

 “Why, yes, I have indeed partook in snorting blow. Is there any reason as to why you’re asking me that right now, darling?” You wished he would stop with the pet names. Or rather, you wished you would stop loving them so much. It felt dirty to enjoy your enemy’s company to this extent.

 “Well, I was wondering if you might like to sneak off and try some of my personal mix.” You leaned in close, covering the side of you mouth with your hand. Eren wasn’t a bad kid or anything, but he’d mess with your plan, and you couldn’t have that. Especially not with his slippery ass trigger finger.

 “Your own personal mix, eh? Don’t tell me you’re involved in the trade, now.” He leaned in just shy of touching your lips. “That wouldn’t be very good for either of us, sweetheart.” That’s it, you were fucking this man if it was part of your plan or not. The entire thing could go south, and you’d still want this man’s dick in your mouth. You didn’t really care anymore. He was too hot to handle, and you were this close to cracking under the pressure. Zeke was right, you were fun to play with.

 “Not at all, I just happen to know the right people.” You grinned at him, knowing you technically weren’t lying. It was your own little inside joke, or so you thought.

 The next thing you knew you were in Zeke’s penthouse, smashed up against the wall with a hand around your neck. By all accounts, this is what you wanted, but it was also quite the opposite.

 “Dearest, I find it insulting that you think I would fall for that pitiful act.” He had you figured out from the moment you walked in. Zeke Yeager never forgot a pretty face. He’d wanted to have you naked in his bed for months, and here you were, all helpless and needy. You were adorable, thinking you could get whatever you wanted from him.

 “Smith was a fool to send anyone, let alone a little minx like you.” You hated how good being insulted by this bitch felt. How did he make it so that your panties got wetter every time he called you a different synonym for whore? It was so awful and so amazing.

 “I’m the slut, yet you’re the one actively trying to fuck me? Do I have that right?” You quipped the best you could from under the pressure of his strong hand.

 “Alright then, we’re both sluts. But the difference between us is that I admit it, yet you pretend to be this perfect little princess in order to fuck powerful men like me.” His grip on your neck tightened as if to add injury to insult.

 “Don’t insult me,” you had to catch your breath between each word, “I fuck men ten times more powerful than you.” But, god was it worth it. You figured he might slap you or otherwise reprimand you, but no, the bastard just smiled wide. What a fucking asshole.

 “Maybe to you.” He widened his cheshire grin. “Maybe you think Erwin’s more powerful. That he has a bigger cock and sucking it will get you further in life.” He pushed you further into the wall. “Or maybe letting Ackerman smack your ass will earn you some cash. Or having Zacharius sniff around your cunt instead of your neck will rise you up the ranks, hmm?” You just grimaced at him, knowing none of it was true. “Or maybe,” he let out a chuckle, “letting Zoe do whatever the hell they’re into will get you more coke and gin.” He was mocking you, ruthlessly, with no signs of stopping, and without letting you get a word in. You were starting to see black spots in your line of vision.

 “Well, fucking with me will get you much more, angel.” He finally let your neck go, letting you fall to the ground, left to look up at the devil in front of you.

 “You fucking suck.” You glared at him, not necessarily trying to hide how much you were enjoying this. As it happened, you weren’t some innocent angel. No, you weren’t a sadistic maniac like Zeke, but you knew what you wanted, and it wasn’t necessarily vanilla. As if reading your earlier thoughts, he bent down to your place on the floor.

 He slapped you, and it wasn’t gentle.

 “You’re a sloppy whore on your best days, now get up and strip.” Well if worst came to worst, you could say that you got him where you wanted him…just not exactly how you wanted him, or with a guarantee you would get what you wanted out of him. Honestly, you felt kind of flattered by his attention and apparent need to fuck you.

 “God, do I have to do everything for you, sweetheart?” Apparently you had been standing around catching your breath too long for his liking. He had made quick work of his own jacket, shirt, and dress pants, leaving him in a black pair of boxers. You hated admitting how magnificent he looked. He was muscular, but not in the same way someone like Reiner or Erwin was. Every single limb on him was lengthy and wiry, thus the bruise marks forming on your neck. While on the subject of length, from what you could see, it applied to his cock as much as it did his other appendages. If it looked that good through the black fabric, you couldn’t even dream of what it would look like out in the open, slapping against his defined v-line and abs.

 You hadn’t even noticed him getting closer to you, completely forgetting about his earlier demand turned complaint.

 “Not only are you a harlot, you’re a useless one, as well.” He came close enough for you to smell the hints of smoke, pine, and black tea that wafted off of him. He started playing with the collar of your shirt. “But damn if you aren’t a pretty one…” He said that more to himself than you, clearly not being comfortable complimenting you. He saw you as a toy, a pawn in his game of chess he was playing with the rest of the world.

 You decided that would be your last deep thought as he began to undress you. Nimbly moving his fingers down each button of your dress shirt, until it came completely undone and bore your chest to him. You were by no means flat, which seemed to entertain the man in front of you.

 “I knew you’d be the perfect slut for me.” He groped your breasts through your bra, hands greedy with the clear goal of making you yearn for him. “Perfect tits, soft skin, pretty face, nice ass, strong will. Yeah, you’ll be fun to break.” He gave you one of his signature smirks, making you want to crush his windpipe and deepthroat his dick at the same time.

 You shrugged your top off your shoulders and let him snake his arms around your chest to undo your bra and expose your tits to the cool air of the room. He didn’t waste time kissing your filthy mouth, and instead skipped straight to your sensitive neck. He slowly dragged his soft lips down your throat, kissing his way over to both sides and under your jaw. He licked and sucked at any area that made you gasp or let out some embarrassing little noise you tried to desperately to hide. He hated how you hid, he needed you to need him, to want him at a level beyond human comprehension. He wanted to destroy you, do break you down to your most animalistic and pitiful form. You were strong, that was for damn sure, but he wanted to fix that.

 He took all this into account as he began nipping at the tops of your breasts. He moved from one to the other with no clear pattern. He dragged his tongue down to your right nipple, only touching the tip of his tongue to it, making you shiver in anticipation and let out a small whine. Yes, that was the progress he wanted to see from you. He swirled his tongue around it, slowly making his way to the center, harshly sucking it into his mouth. He pulled his sinful mouth away from you, leaving a trail of saliva connecting him to you. He quickly made his way to your other nipple, doing the same and driving you just as wild.

 “You know, it wouldn’t hurt you to make more noise, darling.” He teased, sounding genuinely annoyed with you.

 “Well, maybe if you did a better job, I would be louder.” You had discovered your talent of keeping up with his smart mouth, and you used it to your advantage. You wanted to rile him up; to get a rise out of him. As previously stated, you didn’t want a vanilla little love making session, you wanted to fuck.

 “Alright then, if you’re so keen on keeping quiet,” he put his rough hands on your bare shoulders, pushing you back onto the ground, this time on your knees, “how about I stuff that mouth?” You hated how good he was at turning you on.

 He pulled his dick out right in front of your face, letting it lay on his toned abs, just as you had envisioned it. It was easily 10 inches long, 5 inches thick, with a slight upturn that could drive you insane if it hit the right spots, which it would. It was flushed pink and dripping pre-cum; it was pretty.

 “Well, are you just going to gawk at it or are you going to make yourself useful, slut?” The sweet pet names were out the window, swiftly replaced with the most debasing insults he could think of. To avoid any more of his smart ass remarks, you took his thick cock in your hands. You slowly stroked it, taking in exactly how big it was. You moved your plush lips closer, giving it a few small kitten licks to test the waters. You kissed the head and gave longer licks up the side, earning a grunt or two from the man above you. As you began to swirl your tongue around his tip, his strong hand came down and pushed on the back of your head. It wasn’t gentle, forcing you to take him down your throat. Considering his size, it was no shock that you choked on it at first, but he kept his hand on your hair, forcing you to stay on him.

 “That’s it, sweetheart, keep that dirty mouth on fat cock.” Tears starting pooling in your eyes as you struggled to breath around his length. “Aww, are you actually crying?” He cooed, taking sick pleasure in mocking you. “How pathetic of you, darling.” His words send shockwaves of shame and pleasure down to your core. You abhorred how badly you needed him inside of you. As he let out a low moan, he pulled you off his cock, tugging your hair just enough to make you even wetter.

 “Alright, angel. I’m not a big fan of blowjobs, so we’ll leave it at that.” You coughed a little as he bent down to your heaving form.

 “Really? That’s a shock.” That was your genuine reaction. You were far too fucked out to be a smart ass at this point.

 “Yeah, you’re not the first to make that observation.” Much to your surprise, he picked you up bridal style, barely breaking a sweat in the process of getting you to his bedroom. Though the lights were on, you couldn’t take in many details, your cock drunk state making it difficult to process anything other than the warm, bare skin of the monster you tried so hard to vanquish.

 “Now, lets get these cute little panties off, hmm?” You had forgotten him taking off your pants in the heat of the moment. His menacing figure loomed overtop of you, slowly sinking down to your thighs. He placed licks and kisses all over them, leaving a few bite marks along with them. You moaned louder than before, feeling too blissed out to care about your pride. You felt large, tepid fingers hooking themselves between your legs and into your panties. He pulled them to the side, wanting to really take you in. Despite his lust for power and dominance, he much preferred giving head to receiving it, especially when it came to women and their soft, tender pussies. You were no exception to this rule.

 “Goddamn you’re fucking wet.” You looked up at you, making you lean your head back to avoid his gaze. “You must like me more than you care to admit, sweetie.” Just after saying this, he ran one long finger up your dripping slit, coating his fingertip in your slick. He looked at it shimmering in the low light of the room, grinning before taking it into his mouth and tasting what your cunt had to offer.

 “You taste like heaven. Surprising, considering what a nasty girl you are.” Unlike you, he could keep that smartass act up for hours on end, no matter how lost in your sex he was. He landed a chaste kiss to your throbbing heat before flattening his tongue to lick a fat stripe up the middle. He began to devour you, making the lewdest noises you had ever heard in the process. You felt amazing, and disgusting, and just about every other emotion you had ever felt in your life. He was a god at eating your pussy, feeling no remorse in having his lips and beard dripping with your juices. To hell with the burn marks he left on your thighs and the burning sense of guilt you had for moaning so loud and creaming all over the face of your greatest enemy. Shame and guilt were for foolish children with no place in the world, Zeke wanted to enjoy every last second of destroying you.

 As he continued to lick and suck at your most sensitive spots, you began to feel your stomach tighten, signaling your closeness. Zeke noticed as well, taking note of your erupting moans and groans and tugs at his silky hair. He moaned on your clit, the vibrations sending you over the edge. You came all over his face, arching your back of the soft sheets and making you scream his name. He kept his lips attached to your clit as you came down from your high, keeping you ensnared in his trap of bliss.

 “God, you moan like a fucking whore, you know that?” The way he insulted you felt disgustingly good, especially coming from such a obnoxiously handsome man.

 “And you eat pussy like a god.” The veil of hatred came off in one foul swoop. You couldn’t hold back how you truly felt about Zeke Yeager. You were in love with the way he treated you, and spoke to you, and ate you, and soon enough, fucked you. He was so damn good, and you just hated to love and loved to hate him.

 “Oh, do I now?” He let out a low chuckle, taking pride in how helpless and stupid he had made you. “Does that make me your god, pet?” It wasn’t a real question. He knew the answer, and he loved that answer: yes.

 “Now, how about I partake in some earthly pleasures and fuck your brains out, sweetheart?” He questioned, moving his arms up to rest on both sides of your head. His face was right above yours, lips hovering over your breathless, panting ones.

 “Yes, please.” Your eyebrows scrunched together as you grew impatient and needy as all hell. Zeke had a sinister idea. God was a nice term, but he could think of a better one.

 “How about you beg daddy for it?” He was such a disgusting pervert, and he relished in it. You mustered all the strength you could in order to speak.

 “Please fuck my pussy, daddy.” That was all he needed to push himself inside your tight heat. Your walls clenched as he thrusted balls deep inside of you, not caring if you needed to adjust or not. Luckily, you didn’t, despite his size.

 “Fuck yes, angel. You’re so goddamn tight.” He thrusted into you with reckless abandon, using you more than making love to you, which is exactly what you both wanted. Your walls clenched and throbbed as he brought you to orgasm once again.

 “Cumming all over my cock, sweetheart? Such a dirty whore.” He teased, continuing his motions, hitting your g-spot over and over again without much issue. His dick was perfect, reaching every inch of you that made you scream out in pleasure and overstimulated bliss. All of this for a few bags of cocaine and bullets. You weren’t even thinking of that as he pounded into you, getting rougher and sloppier than before. He was getting close to his own high just as you were about to reach your third. No one had ever made you feel like this. You never wanted to let him go. Fuck everyone you cared about, this was too damn good to throw away.

 “Where do you want my cum, slut?” He asked seconds before climaxing.

 “Wherever you want it, daddy.” That was exactly what he wanted to hear. You had been molded into the perfect toy for him, even if it was just for the moment. He had debased and perverted you, like putty in his hands. You thought you could just waltz in there and take what you wanted from him. But no, instead you were writhing around on his bed with his fat cock filling up your pussy while you screamed for your daddy. You were filthy, slutty perfection. He quickly pulled out of you and shot his cum on your stomach and chest. Noticing you were still squirming around, he pushed his thumb to your clit and rubbed circles as two of his fingers entered you and hit your sweet spot.

 “Come on, slutty girl, cum for daddy.” This time felt different than the others. You were completely out of your mind with pleasure and lust, and he was hitting just the right spots. You came around his fingers, squirting your juices and ruining his sheets. As if he could sense it, he had moved his face down just in time for it to reach his mouth, coating yet another layer of your cum on his beard. He licked his lips, savoring you taste and the blissed out, fuck drunk look on your face. He wished he could keep you like this forever. No, he would make sure to keep you like this forever. You were going to be his for the rest of time, no matter what it took. Even if he had to play the long game and pretend you had a choice in the matter.

 “Well, sweetheart, I’m afraid you have to go home empty handed. I’m sure those tarts will just pat you on the head and congratulate you for trying your best. That’s why they’ll never surpass me, and that’s why you will come crawling back to me.” You couldn’t respond, too disappointed and drained to say a word.

 “I have a shower that I recommend you use.” He looked down at you, your eyes hazy and barely focused on him. You were completely exposed to him. You looked beautiful. “In an act of civility, I’ll let you sleep here tonight. On a different bed, of course, considering the damage you’ve done.” You laughed at that, and he followed suite.

 “You know Zeke, for a monster, you’re not too bad.” You looked at him, admiration clear in your eyes.

 “You’re not too unbearable either.”

[honeytea8]

✨✨La Squadra Boyfriend Headcanons✨✨

[Alexa, play Boyfriend by Big Time Rush]

Guys, I spend an ungodly amount of time thinking about La Squadra, so here are some bf headcanons for the sexiest group of assassins in Naples. No one asked but I am bringing it straight to your dash anyway! (under the cut for length lmao)

I’m going to start with Prosciutto, who has recently fallen on my radar pretty heavy! 

He’s a good and decent boyfriend, if not a busy one. Not that he doesn’t care about the relationship, but most of his energy was going to Passione things before you waltzed in and so he’ll struggle a bit between his work responsibilities and maintaining his relationship with you, but only in the beginning. 

If you are also a part of Passione, it’s a hell of a lot easier to manage. 

I see Prosciutto as the gift-giving type: lingerie, sweets, perfume, designers, etc. His salary isn’t the best, but he manages it as well as he can just to accommodate you! 

I just can’t get the idea out of my head that Pro was raised by a strict mama, that’s why he can be a bit of a stickler sometimes. He’ll catch you still lounging in bed at nine am, and be like “Why are you still in bed? Get dressed, we’re going out.” Dude!

I’m sorry to say, but Prosciutto is absolutely the ‘lecturing’ type. (He lectured someone in nearly every scene in the anime, Formaggio once and Pesci numerously and Bucci too) 

He will lecture you when you make mistakes, especially because as his s/o, he has high expectations for you and believes you’re capable of so much more. It’s never, ever out of hate. He loves you, and that’s why he chides you a bit lol. 

This does not negate the fact that he doesn't mind when you lean on him for support. He likes when you count on him, because he always comes through especially for you!

Depending on whether you’re in the mafia or not, I totally see him sparring with you, or working out with you in an effort to make you tough. Prosciutto wants you to be able to defend yourself, just in case. If you complain, he’ll tell you, “Better safe than sorry, tesoro”.

Prosciutto will respect you, period.

A good listener, goddamn! He’s up there with Risotto when it comes to who listens to their s/o more! If you have an issue, he’ll hear you out and offer advice if you want it. If you give him advice, he’ll take it into serious consideration. He’s honestly a good partner, can’t stress that enough.

Finally, sex with Pro is an entire event. Romantic dinner, candles lit, wine, the whole nine yards before he gives you nine inches of something else :) (I’m kidding!! Lmao, kinda). 

But as I said, Prosciutto is quite deliberate, and a bit of a perfectionist. He knows what to do and how to do it, you can trust him.

Ghiaccio is next only because he’s my favorite. 

The ice gremlin is probably the most interesting (and hilarious) boyfriend out of the bunch (I say this with only a tidbit of bias). He isn’t funny himself, but funny shit just happens to him. 

Because of this, he will use you as a soundboard when everyone else refuses to listen to him. He’s got a lot to say, so be prepared for his TEDtalks. LMAO!

It will take some perception on your part to notice when he actually expects a response from you, and other times he’s just ranting to get his point out. 

He will correct your grammar when you text, but barely notices when he makes a similar mistake (his brain moves in mph). Please use the proper names like Venezia, Italia, Roma and Napoli when talking to this man; save yourself from the headache.

When it comes to dates, please have mercy on him, he’s a textbook over-thinker! You’ll just have to plan something simple at home for you both to enjoy. 

He isn’t incapable of planning dates, but he’ll want everything to be so absolutely perfect for his s/o and will throw a fit when it ultimately isn’t. 

Contrary to popular belief, I think that Ghiaccio is a pretty attentive partner. He’s super intelligent and I think a part of it stems from his innate ability to read people (I’m referencing the part in the anime where he deduced what Giorno and Mista had come to look for, while going off very little information). 

The more time he spends with you, the better he gets at it. 

His form of affection will be shown through the amount of time you both spend together. When it comes to sex or anything related to that, be gentle and slow as Ghiaccio will likely be a flustered mess. 

As he becomes more comfortable and confident, he will be bolder and just ask out right if you’ll suck him off tonight or not. The man appreciates directness, so don’t bother being coy. “You want me to give you head? Cool, lay down a towel or something.” is what he’ll probably say.

Very practical 👌🏾👌🏾

Melone, good lord, he’s kind of perfect. 

A bit of a doting boyfriend here and there—very much concerned about your health. Expect him to ask if you’ve eaten, or taken your multivitamin. How are your bowel movements?  LMAO

It can become a bit much, but he really genuinely cares. He’s not asking to be intrusive or nasty! If he was, you’d know. 🤣

But I seriously consider Melone to be the one (at least among La Squadra) who is way, way invested in his relationships. He will know every little detail about you; will ask you lots of questions and expects you to ask him just as many. 

This may be annoying to some, but this dude will definitely bring up your horoscope in an argument. He’ll be like “I honestly can’t fathom why you’re being this way, though it’s to be expected from a libra.” 

Peg this bitch so he can shut up.  

Melone is also touchy as hell, but not in a clingy way. He loves touching, and just to tag onto the headcanon about his partial blindness, I want to say that he’s so touchy because that’s how he ‘sees’ you best.

Just know that half the time, he isn’t touching you to be lecherous, even if he genuinely does like the feel of your skin under his fingertips. Melone will even encourage you to touch him back. 

Rub his thigh or back and he’ll be simping.

He is obsessed with your legs, and will paint your toes if you let him. 

LOVES PDA! Melone will also tongue-kiss you in public if you let him!

Notice how I keep saying ‘if you let him’. Give him an inch and he’ll press you for a mile, so if there are boundaries you would like to establish, please do, cuz he sure as hell won’t, just saying!

When it comes to sex, Melone is a dick and coochie sensei. Oral is his favorite thing to do, probably enjoys giving more than receiving to be honest. I’d say he’s pretty much mastered sex for what it is. 

That being said, if he’s ever talking out of his neck, just invite him to put his mouth to better use. He’ll even thank you for your gracious request.

Formaggio is next 💀 

According to my JoJo compatriots from discord, he’s like the Optimus Prime of fuckboi’s so let’s ride that wave for a bit! LMAO

I hope it doesn’t come as a surprise that Formaggio is pretty shameless. He will send you a dick pic on Sunday morning before church and have the audacity to say “Just wanted to bless you real quick”. 

@autumn-kouhai mentioned him giving his s/o sickly sweet pet names and I just have to agree. 

Expect to be hit upside the head with: baby-boo, sugar plum, honey bunches, sweetums. I can imagine them becoming really ridiculous too like “the last piece of red velvet cake” or “cheddar bae biscuits from Red Lobster”

His catch phrase is “Got nudes?”

Send them, and he won’t be afraid to reply with something equally sexy. 

Be warned though, he will stockpile whatever you send him and then be careless with his phone. If you don’t mind Illuso’s snoopy ass seeing your nudes then by all means, have at it. Otherwise, send them through snapchat, so they disappear later. 

As far as La Squadra boyfriends go, he’s the most fun! Y’all don’t even go anywhere because man’s is broke. BUT, Formaggio knows how to have a good time without any need to spend money (my kind of dude tbh) you guys just crank up the tunes, dance, and get lit until the neighbors complain. 

Formi is also the CEO of jokes/memes, and will have you in absolute tears almost always! I literally tell my friends that funny guys are so dangerous, don’t sleep on them! They will make you laugh until your panties drop, it’s magic, I swear. Formaggio has that same energy. 

No matter how bad of a day his s/o is having, rest assured, he will draw the biggest laugh out of you.

Besides his fuckboi tendencies, his most redeeming quality is the fact that he’s super cool and fun to hang with. You’ll literally have a good time, always, because his energy is right! Very good vibes around this man, I swear! It’ll be exactly like dating your best friend, because essentially, he will be your bestie.

Formi has many moments of tenderness that aren’t sexually charged too—moments where the jokes stop and he’ll just rub your back or feet, this is usually when you aren’t feeling well and need some quiet. 

However, Formaggio won’t let you mope all day, he’ll pull out the big guns and call you his “sweetie baby” and when you try to resist he’ll say “What, I’m just tryna show you some love.”

He’s a good dude lmao I’d date a guy like him irl 😭

Pesci stans wya??! Let’s get into this baby boy. 

Pesci is boyfriend material, idgaf what anyone says. 

He is pretty much the least problematic to be with among all of La Squadra, even more so than Risotto (don’t argue with me). 

Pesci is hyper aware of your likes and dislikes and will literally go out of his way to make sure that you’re well and okay. 

Arguments are basically nonexistent and if they occur it ain’t coming from his side. 

I also think that Pesci has a lot of empathy, so when you’re going through something, he’s right there in the thick of it with you. If you’ve seen that meme that goes ‘when my gf is on her period it’s UterUS’ lmao that’s Pesci’s energy 100%. 

Sometimes, he’s more of a lover and not a fight, that is perfectly okay!

However, if someone tries up his s/o, say farewell to Mr. Niceguy. He will defend your honor to his dying breath. And with you in his corner, trust me, he’s not going down. 

A romantic at heart, Pesci will plan little date trips like picnics in the park or boat trips to Capri, actually, I’d like to point out that he excels in the art of date planning. If you’re the adventurous type, he’ll plan outings where you both will be more active, like biking through the city or renting a mop-ed and going sight-seeing. 

Because Pesci has a sensitive stomach, he’s very much considerate of what you both put in your bodies. If you have dietary restrictions or allergies, this guy knows all about it and will cater to you perfectly. 

A true gentleman through and through, he will never force himself on you, ever. In fact, he really doesn’t like engaging in anything sexual when you’re drunk or high, sorry if you’re into that! 

Pesci is the kind of guy who keeps up with your favorite shows.

If ya’ll have similar taste in media or literature, he will immerse himself in it so that he can relate to you all the more.

If there’s anyone who will entertain anime-related discourse, no matter how nonsensical, it’s Pesci. And he isn’t just putting up with it, he’s actively engaging in the conversation so you are always heard and validated. 

He’s an A+ boyfriend, that’s all I gotta say! Haters can stay mad :)

Goddamn Illuso... idk man.

I really feel like you have to have thick/tough skin to handle this guy, for various reasons. 

The first being that Illuso can be a bit mean at first. He’ll push your buttons on purpose just to see what’ll make you tick. Will tease the living heck out of you, always, kind of a bully lmao but not to the extreme, it’s just his brand of humor—and the thing is, he won’t be mad when you dish it right back, so it’s cool. 

Secondly, Illuso has big dick energy!! 

I mean rightfully so, because he is indeed packing! But my word, he ain’t humble about it at all! 

He is not above making jokes about ‘splitting you in half’. In fact all of his jokes have hidden, dirty undertones! 

His affection is shown through speech mostly. Illuso will drop subtle innuendos and provocations, half to see you flustered and half because he wants you to know how much he wants you. 

Illuso isn’t incredibly vocal about his feelings outside of ‘I’m tryna hit that thang’ but you won’t doubt that he loves you because Illuso doesn’t waste his own time. 

If he’s spending his time with you, you can rest assured that it’s because he wants to. 

Illuso is a voyeur and you’ll just have to understand/accept that and move on. 

He loves watching you and will even creep over to your place through the mirror world just to hang or watch you do chores. Loves to surprise you and give you jump scares lmao it’ll make you a tad paranoid but it’s also fun. 

Illuso is prone to random bouts of sweetness; it’s very sporadic, very touch-and-go. 

One day, you’ll wake up to chocolates on your dresser or new shoes, lingerie, or makeup if you wear it. I imagine that if you’re low on funds, he will even help you buy your groceries that week. 

It’ll surprise the hell out of you, but that’s just how Illuso is. He enjoys keeping you on your toes! 

He’s prideful and smug as hell, so he will definitely expect a thank you, because even if he does it out of the kindness in his heart, he also wants to hear that you appreciate him

Same goes for the bedroom scene. Illuso loves making you vocal, it’s his favorite thing in the world, so he’ll make a game out of doing the things that get the biggest reaction out of you. Like I said, it's that big dick energy at work here, smh.

Sorbet and Gelato in a polyamorous relationship with you? Let’s get it! 

We don’t get anything substantial about these two except that Sorbet follows the money, so these are all personal headcanons for how I see and write them. 

Here’s the juice: when it comes to you as their s/o, these two are possessive as hell. You are theirs and that’s that on that! 😭 Don’t ask questions, just go with it.

Sorbet is the chill one of the duo. He can be a bit smug at times, but he’s mostly a laid back dude who doesn’t get bothered by much.

When it comes to you, Sorbet likes to spend quality time with you more than anything, and will ask you to cook for him at your place so he ain’t gotta spend money. Oh? Did I not mention that I kinda think of him as a cheapskate? Lmao cuz I do.

Sorbet will come by your place just to steal your coupons from the mail then head out; you’re not using ‘em so why should he let them go to waste?

Gelato is the complete opposite; personality wise, I headcanon him as a mix between Melone and Formaggio lmao

But it’s not as crazy as it sounds, he’s cute and outspoken like Melone, while maintaining a free-spirit like Formaggio. One quality that I like is that he’s quite devoted to you and Sorbet. If anyone crosses either of you, goodluck to them!

I like to think Gelato’s also just really boujee and high maintenance. He loves to pamper and be pampered. You and him tag-team Sorbet’s wallet and go on spa dates together at his expense (not that he ever really stood a chance)

While Sorbet is cool with just being in the same room as you, Gelato loves hugging/cuddling with you and Sorbet—will definitely fight for the middle spot between the two of you on the couch during movie nights.

He baby, so let him have it lol

In the bedroom, I would salute anyone with the guts to take the two of them on. They both lay down that work, period. 

Sorbet gets his kicks from teasing and edging you (his sadistic side comes out a bit), while Gelato loves when you give him extra TLC. To put it short, they know how to take care of you, so there are no issues there. 

Last but not least, Mr. Risotto Nero himself.

Man, idc on the lowest of keys, he seems a little bit like a grandpa to me

The type to sit at home and do crosswords, has a bird feeder in his yard and plays old Italian hits while washing the dishes. It’s very domestic 💀 (I find it cute, whatever!)

As a boyfriend, I can’t imagine him suddenly being spontaneous or outgoing unless you drag him out of his home/comfort zone.

Be patient with Mr. Nero, and he can come to surprise you

After a while, it won’t be just you dragging him out and about; one day he’ll ask you to come over and you’ll be greeted with a nice, traditional, homemade meal

Pay attention and you will notice him watching your face to see if you like his cooking 🥺

After seeing his fight with Doppio, I must admit that Risotto is very, very observant, almost scarily so.

I can totally picture him pointing out random things about his s/o that even they don’t know

One night, Risotto may come up to you and say “I talked to your neighbor about the dog, they’ll keep it inside now.” And you’re just staring like 😳 how did he know the barking was keeping you up at night????

He’s sweet, and will take good care of you as a boyfriend should.

Very good listener, won’t talk as much but will hang on to your every word, I promise. He could even recite it to you verbatim.

He’s a big dude, that ain’t news, so expect to be swallowed up in hugs and sometimes even picked up (as a tall girl myself, I simp!!!)

Gives A1 piggyback rides, lol

ALSO RISOTTO IS HUMBLE ASF!

Big dick energy, but on low volume 👏🏾 after all, he doesn’t need to do much talking, because a night with him is more than enough!

Listen babe, you better stretch, do some squats, and prep in whatever way you can before Mr. Nero gives you that work. 🤐

Lowkey a freak, but it’s well hidden behind his ‘quiet giant’ exterior

So, who are y'all dating? Personally, I’m going for Formaggio and Pesci hehe

[boldlyanxious]

None the Wiser 10

Masterlist

All fic masterlist

I took a bit of a break from this one after doing so much all at once. Also had to decide what way to go. I didn't plan ahead for her to run out so now I'm winging it a bit.

Marinette had left the Eiffel Tower that night with Cassie's number. At first she thought the girl was trying to make a joke when she suggested telling her parents that she had been running around as a magical hero for 2 years. But Cassie gave a well-reasoned argument for why she should reveal herself. Much of it was the ways that it strained their relationship and caused her to need to lie all the time. But beyond that there was the added burden on being the guardian with not only no additional support but having lost heroes as they had been revealed.

Marinette didn't run home and tell her parents right away. She took a few days to mull it over. She knew that the guardian had wanted secrecy above all but she wasn't sure how prudent that was. He had only become a guardian because he made a major mistake as a child that he couldn't fix. His secrecy had only protected him but didn't solve any problems. When faced with the same problem that had never been fixed his solution was to run and hide again while leaving Paris vulnerable. It had been her and Chat Noir who had fixed his mistake even if she had eventually made a mistake that cost him the guardianship. She has solved the issue even if things were still tough.

Perhaps the additional support of her parents would be a good thing. She should probably discuss it with Chat Noir first. She had been avoiding discussing any of it with him or Damian. She sent them both messages that she did not want them to bring it up until she had time to process. Damian took it pretty well but Adrien seemed to keep trying to catch her eye to get her to talk, but then she had known Adrien longer and he also found out about her secret biological family so the situations were quite a bit different. She pulled out her phone to text him.

---

Marinette brought pastries to the park, including a double cheesy bread for Plagg and macarons for Tikki. The box lid was pushed back down over the kwamis so Marinette and Adrien could talk. He offered her fruit infused water before they wandered away from the photo shoot set that he had just left. He used a wipe to remove the makeup and ran his hands through his hair causing it to be adorably fluffy.

Marinette wasn't sure how to start. She avoided Adrien's soft eyes filled with concern and understanding. She picked the flaky bits off her croissant instead and looked up when he waved at some others across the park. She recognized the girls from school but she didn't really know them. Hopefully they wouldn't talk about seeing her in the park with Adrien. She hadn't told Alya because Lila had been nearby and she didn't want to make a big deal of it because Alya had noticed that they were acting a bit weird around each other.

"Do you know them?" Marinette asked.

"We share some classes. Just found out today that I'm partnered with the one in purple for the big history project. Hopefully that will work out okay "

"I was partnered with Nathaniel. It's nice to have someone I already know is reliable. He might be quiet for presenting but I don't know if I could handle the stress of an unreliable project partner."

"Because of all the other stress from things you couldn't or haven't shared?" he asked quietly.

"Um-yeah. Actually that is mostly what I wanted to talk about today. I'm going to tell my parents about everything."

"Isn't it all supposed to all be a secret?"

"According to Tikki, the level of secrecy has depended on the guardian handing out miraculi."

"So you think we should tell people now that you are guardian?"

"But necessarily. Mostly I think that it's important that people don't know. But we aren't adults who control our own lives and schedules. Sometimes we need extra support out allowances."

"I don't think I could tell my father. Even if he would see me, I think he would find a way to prevent me sneaking out if he knew."

"That is probably true. But my parents are the opposite. Having to lie and sneak around behind their back has been harmful to all of us. They have been a lot more worried recently anytime I'm not where they expected."

"Is this because of what Superboy said about you being Robin's sister?"

"I--"

She faltered and looked down instead of continuing. Adrien reached out and picked up her hand saying her name softly.

"Marinette, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to. But sometimes it helps to talk even if it's hard to say."

"No, I think it will help you to know. It's just all been so confusing. Do you remember the man from the hotel?"

"Yeah. From Alya's party."

"I met him that night when I went to change during the party. The next day he wanted to have breakfast with me." She bit her lip before spitting out the next words all at once. "Because he is my biological father."

"You said he made your parents nervous. Did he treat your mom badly and that is why they never told you?"

"Actually, they never knew until then."

"How--"

"My parents had help from a fertility clinic. I didn't know until I took a DNA test after we did blood typing in biology class because mine wasn't right." She looked down again. "They aren't worried that he will hurt me. They are worried that he will take me away."

"Cases like that from donors or whatever are really hard to fight though."

Except he is rich. Like really rich. Bruce Wayne rich."

The words just sat there for a moment as Adrien considered them. She could see him working it out and could tell the exact moment he knew when he looked back at her with shock in his eyes.

"Bruce Wayne is your biological father?" He breathed out hard. "The Bruce Wayne."

"That reaction is a lot of why I've not told many people. I didn't even know who he was until the fashion show. I was so worried about everything else that I never considered asking more about him. He was just Bruce."

He wrapped his arms around her shoulders and squeezed her close for a moment. Marinette leaned against him less nervous than she felt before but still with the weight of talking to her parents.

"I agree you should tell your parents. It will help them to know. It will probably just give them other things to worry about." He smiled down at her. "Lucky for them that we always save the day, My Lady."

She looked up at him with the use of his hero's affectionate nickname for her. He was definitely looking at her how Chat Noir tended to look at Ladybug. She tensed a bit, not sure how to manage his possible feelings now that he knew she was Ladybug and not just Marinette. But he said nothing more. He leaned over and kissed her head gently and told her goodbye with a final squeeze to her shoulders.

---

Her parents just stared at her after she blurted out her secret identity without preamble. They were stunned into silence and waited for her to crack a smile before they reacted. They looked at each other and then both started talking about their feelings about her revelation. If they didn't calm down Marinette predicted she would have a headache soon. She decided it was best to wait it out rather than try defending herself.

As she expected it was mostly disbelief and shock at the dangers she had faced but there was an underlying message of pride. They kept on for a few minutes while Marinette waited for them to get it out of their system. She could tell it was ending when they both held her close and they ceased the onslaught of incredulous concern. They all went quiet for a minute until Marinette asked their thoughts once they had been able to process for a few minutes.

"Did you guys have any questions?"

"Why did you tell us? Actually why didn't you tell us before?" her dad asked.

"Well things have changed recently and it makes it all so much different."

"Your leader. He was trapped by Hawkmoth and named you guardian. What does that mean?" her mom asked.

"It means I'm but responsible for all of the miraculi in Paris. The previous guardian had moved on and had no memory of any of the miraculous or having met me."

"I don't know whether to be more upset that you kept it secret all this time or that we didn't notice." Sabine said.

"I wanted to tell you. I really hate lying."

"We know you do Sweetheart. That's part of what makes this hard to see. We didn't expect it from you," her dad said.

"I always worried that you would find out I'm missing and think something bad had happened. Especially after Bruce showed up. You were so worried at first."

"We are still worried a little. But so far he seems to just want an opportunity to love you." Sabine said. "We can't fault him for that."

Marinette agreed. Although it was a very strange situation, he genuinely seemed to want to be a part of her life without making himself a nuisance. She even thought he might he holding back a desire to buy her everything she ever wanted. He had left town again and she could only hope Damian would keep his silence, but he would be returning as soon as his schedule allowed.

They continued talking about all the ways these two major revelations had affected their lives while they made dinner and ate. It was all a huge weight off Marinette and she was happy it had been suggested. She really did believe that it was the best thing for her and the best way to protect her parents, even if it meant they would have to watch their reactions. Her dad might have been thinking about that because as she was heading up to her room he stopped her one last time.

"Does this mean you are in love with Chat Noir but he rejected you without knowing you were Ladybug?"

Tags

Next

@theymakeupfairies | @emjrabbitwolf | @laurcad123 | @redscarlet95 | @acoolspacegirl | @nerd-nowandforever | @justafanwarrior | @pawsitivelymiraculous | @vixen-uchiha | @tumbling-down-hills-and-stuff | @fusser90 | @violetfandomaddict | @catthhay | @kking13 | @cresentmo0n | @officiallydarkgeek | @mewwitch | @dast218 | @trippingovermyfeet | @pepelachanel | @ira-sairain | @user00000003 | @justarandomtumblerblog | @greatcatblaze | @roselynfey | @zeneralla | @thethirdwheelfriend | @tired-butterfly | @a-star-with-a-human-name | @ramos123 | @spider-person95 | @thesassassin | @resting-confused-bitchface | @jessigurl-design | @darkthunder1589 | @silvergold-swirl | @demonicbusiness | @jeminiikrystal | @roguishredaxion | @aestheticnpoetic | @iloontjeboontje | @sunflowers-and-mooncakes | @the-one-woman-army | @wolf2118 | @ultimatetornshipper

[ezrasarm]

Ori’jagyc

Pairing: Paz Vizsla x Mandalorian!Reader

Word count: 4.2K

Summary: Paz beats the shit out of someone. But he does it with love!

Warnings: Canon typical (?) violence, a bit of angst over here, a bit of fluff over there, my attempt to give a character with five seconds of screen time an entire backstory… this is a mere interpretation!

A/n: I don’t know when… I don’t know how… but I have fallen for the big blue buckethead ...sooooooo this happened. I’m new to writing for Paz so please let me know how it went!

[ masterlist ]

Paz wasn’t exactly a prideful man. But he did carry the name Mando with a type of honour and sanctity that you saw in few others. He was fiercely devoted to his creed and to upholding the Mandalorian way and although part of that was accepting that other Mandalorians interpreted the tenets of Mandalorian life in different ways, he did have a tendency to take other’s looser abidance by the creed personally. You had no reason to believe this time was any exception.

You hadn’t been planning on stopping by the training arena today but a low thrum reverberating off of the coverts walls piqued your curiosity. The closer you followed the noise the clearer it became, soon morphing into what you could make out as the cacophonous metal clang of beskar consorted with raucous shouts. It wasn’t until you had stepped into the buzzing space that you saw the dense huddle of Mandalorians encircling one of the many training mats. The scene was not new to you, it seemed that a well-matched fight of this nature broke out at least once a week and was able to draw the eyes of those with nothing better to do than watch. It wasn’t until you were close enough for their chants to make out decipherable words that it hit you. “Paz” they were shouting, over and over again, cheering him on. 

Your pace quickened at that, shoulders forceful and your smaller frame coming to your advantage as you slipped between the clamouring bodies until you found a familiar silhouette. “What happened?” You asked, your voice already breathless when you gripped Din’s upper arm. Paz and Din had a long-standing difference of opinion on many things but they still treated one another as brothers. He had a genuine concern for the large, blue-clad mandalorian that not many in the covert did, thinking that a man of that size could certainly handle himself. 

Din hesitated a moment before speaking, mouth dry and words clumsy falling out of his mouth. “He insulted his ability to protect the clan,” Din said, concern clear in his tone when he leaned closer to speak over the roar of mandalorians looking for their afternoon’s entertainment. 

“Kriff,” you muttered under your breath. A comment like that around Paz and you surely had a death wish. To insult his ability to protect was as good as insulting his devotion to his religion and that was not something he took lightly. 

His parents had died in their fight to uphold the mandalorian way. To him, dishonouring it was as good as dishonouring them. Heroes, who died warriors’ deaths. He would not allow those deaths to be in vain and he most certainly would not allow himself to taint their family name. So a careless insult like that was not something he could let stand. 

Unfortunately, they happened a lot. People saw a man of his stature and reputation and they saw a challenge. Someone to provoke so they could prove their strength. Sadly for them it didn’t always work out that way. “Why didn’t you stop him?” You ask, as though you could even attempt placing that responsibly on him.

“He wouldn’t listen. He never does.” Din sighs but you’re already turning your attention to the front of the crowd where you can hear the clash of armour on armour. “Wait, I wouldn’t-” Din had tried to argue, arm stretching out to try and catch your wrist but you had already disappeared from his line of sight, jostling your way through more solid bodies.

You had seen Paz lose his temper before. He could be quick to anger and even quicker to start a fight. What was worse was he didn’t often lose. You could remember quite clearly those times as kids- he would never admit it of course but he was a sensitive child. One mal word in his direction and he would lose it. Speaking about things as cumbersome as emotions wasn’t something people tended to invest their time in so no one really took the time to find out why. They excused it as anger issues and went on with their days. 

He had grown better about it over the years, more level headed and harder to shake- both qualities which made him the good leader he was. But there were still times where he would fracture and that same angry, hurting child would burst forth. 

When you finally managed to wriggle your way to the front, he was pacing the fighting ring slowly. Carefully circling his prey. A routine you knew quite well at this point. “Ori'buyce, kih'kovid.” he spoke, his voice warning and serious but it carried a hearty edge to it. One that normally caused a warmth to bloom in your chest but in this case it made your blood run cold. He was enjoying this too much. “How’s the view from down there, alor?”

His opponent was on his knees, folded over himself. One palm was planted firmly on the mat while the other clutched at his ribs. “Nar'sheb,” he gasped out before pushing himself upright, the hand that had been gripped at his side now held out a vibroblade which Paz hit out of his grasp with what was quite literally a slap on the wrist before dragging him closer by his extended arm. You gasped when he jutted a hand out to grab the olive green armoured mandalorian by the throat, raising him a foot or so in the air before slamming him back down into the ground. Paz crouched over him now, his helmet hardly a couple of inches from that of his opponent’s before speaking again.

“You want to try that again?” He asked through what you were sure were gritted teeth.

“Nar’” the green-tinged mandalorian choked out through a raspy cough, “sheb,” he finished. Your stomach dropped at that. He had just given Paz the exact excuse he wanted. If it was an insult to him, it was an insult to the creed and that, to Paz, was justification enough for punishment. Before you knew it he was kneeling on his opponent’s chest pounding blow after unwavering blow into the offender’s helmet. You knew his hands would be raw and bloody after that. You kept waiting for him to stop- for him to get tired, or bored or for some sense to be knocked into him- but he kept going and when an ear splitting crack of the plastoid composite giving way fired through the room you knew the next hit would be fatal.

“Paz!” You exclaimed. You hadn’t raised your voice but it carried nonetheless. You hadn’t realized you had lurched yourself into the ring either until his fist stopped in mid-air, the cheering shouts which had since turned to panicked murmurs of protest, went silent as it shook there. You could see the cogs turning in his head, the war of anger and reason grappling in his mind. “Stop.” You said. It could have been a whisper but his hand dropped nonetheless, falling limp at his side as he rolled off of his opponent so he sat, folded in on himself, arms balanced on the tops of his knees as he heaved in exhaustion.

When it dawned on you that, having taken away their only source of entertainment, you had since become the centre of attention. You paused, straightening up as you turned to face the crowd of spectators. “What are you doing looking at me for? Get him to a med bay.” You said. You held no authority here and yet suddenly when you spoke you found people listening and the large green warrior was being shuffled out of the room by several bystanders. 

“And you,” You said quieter now. The words were only meant for you and him to hear when you pressed a palm to his shoulder. “You need to calm yourself down.” You said. Your voice, firm but gentle as you spoke, gripping one of his hands firmly to act as leverage for him to find his footing. The strongman act had returned when he was upright again. Posture stoic and back rigid as he gave you a quiet nod but he still seemed... lost: in a daze that made it hard for you to be mad at him. “I’ll be over to check on you in a minute.” You whisper now, pointing him off in the direction of the benches which lined the large room.

“I don’t know how you do that.” Din spoke. Pushing himself off the wall of the hallway as you left the med bay where you had gone to check on Paz’s latest sparring partner. You needed to keep yourself busy. You needed to give Paz some space. 

“Do what?” You ask, as you swivel on your heel to face him.

“Get him to listen to you.” Din added. You had to laugh at that. It often felt like Paz didn’t listen to anyone but himself. He may be physically strong but he was headstrong too, which, as you had learned, could be a dangerous combination. “You really don’t know do you?” Din asks. There’s an amused lilt to his voice and you find your eyebrows furrowing under your mask at the sound of it. 

You would have told him to wipe that smirk off his face but you were too confused by the question that went with it so care. “Know what?” You ask, giving him a skeptical nod as you readjust your posture.

“You have him wrapped around your finger.” Din chuckles now as though it's obvious. 

You yourself acknowledged that the sight was a funny one to behold. A man as large, burly and threatening as himself being told what to do by someone about half his size. The idea that he listened at all- that you held so much power over him- well that concept was amusing enough but now Din asked you how and you had no explanation for him.

Perhaps it was because of the soft spot you’d had for him since childhood. While others saw a big intimidating bully you saw a misunderstood child. A warm heart with a sense of humour like no other and a will to do nothing but the best for those he cared for. You weren’t quite sure when it was that Paz became your responsibility. To put him back together in more ways than one after a particularly gruelling fight, to check in on him when a mission didn’t go according to plan or to keep him company when others were too scared. But you took on the deed without hesitation. You did it because you saw something in him that pulled at your heartstrings. You did it because you cared for him and as much as you knew he would never admit it, he needed the support. He needed you…

Which was why you found yourself swallowing down the questions you had for Din and excusing yourself. “How are you doing over here, ori’jagyc?” You asked, nudging his foot gently with the toe of your boot. The word, a schoolyard insult he had been pestered with as a child, would normally cause his blood to boil had it been said by anyone else. But he liked the way it sounded coming off of your tongue. The way you reclaimed it as a term of endearment for him rather than a way to tease him over his size and sometimes tumultuous temper.

He was sitting on the edge of the bench you had left him at in the now nearly empty training hall. Feet planted on the floor, elbows planted on his knees and helmet planted in his palms. “Paz...” you said as you came to kneel in front of him when you got no acknowledgement.

“It was a fair fight.” He finally spoke after a few more moments. His face was still buried from view but you thought that was progress enough. 

“I know it was, Paz.” You hummed softly, placing a hand on his knee to test the waters. When he didn’t shove you away, you scooted yourself a little closer between his feet to try and coax his gaze up to yours but he didn’t budge. 

“I didn’t mean to...” His voice trails off as though he’s at a loss for words. “Ni nu copaani kyr'amur ner vod.” He says, voice half-broken and weak in a way you knew not many got to bare witness to. You could hear the regret even through the crackle of his modulator. 

“I know you didn’t.” You crooned. “He might not be challenging you to a rematch any time soon but I hear he’s gonna be okay.” You assure him. You don’t get to know Paz Vizsla as well as you do without knowing that sometimes he miscalculated his own strength. He had taken a vow to protect the covert- all of it- and you knew he would never do anything to undermine that, even if the idiot had it coming. “He was taunting you, he shouldn’t have done that.” You conceded. 

But what you saw today was no scuffle over a few carelessly discarded insults. There was something else burning behind those punches you just couldn’t figure out what it was yet. You would have asked him but when your gaze fell to his lap to try and gather your thoughts you spotted his hands still trembling slightly between you and you winced. The mental note you had made from before coming back to the forefront of your mind. 

“May I?” You murmured sliding your small hands under his giant palms and waiting for permission before gently tugging at each of the fingertips to loosen them and sliding the gloves off as delicately as you could. If he felt any pain- you were sure he must have- he didn’t show it. Your eyes scanned over his knuckles, bruised, bloodied and swollen already. You were sure he must have fractured a few bones just by looking at it. You wondered how he could have done this. What must have boiled over in him to inflict this kind of pain upon himself without hesitation.

Your other hand had come to lift his chin but he resisted and it made you sigh in gentle exasperation. “Look at me.” You said. Your tone wasn’t demanding or harsh. Instead, it was gentle and maybe even a little bit desperate. It made his heart clench in his chest and then there it was again, that inexplicable obedience and razor-sharp consideration of your every word as his visor tilted up to settle on you. 

“Paz, I’m worried that one day you aren’t going to stop in time.” You say suddenly. You know he can’t see them but your eyes are pleading behind your mask. “You don’t need that kind of blood on your hands. Your conscience suffers enough without it.” This time he’s the one to sigh. You can feel the tension of his head trying to bow out of sight again but you keep your palm on the cheek of his helmet rooted, steady in its place and he gives in.

“I knew better.” He agrees solemnly. “I know that. But something snapped inside of me. Something I couldn’t control- that I still can’t- I…” His words trail off and you can sense his reluctance to finish the thought so you take the opportunity to fill the silence instead.

“Din said he insulted you.” You pressed, tentatively. You didn’t want to reignite a conflict that should remain extinguished but you had to know what that anger was. At that, he actually choked out a laugh that caught you slightly off guard.

“They can insult me all they want.” Was his response. His head shaking as though you should have known that already. “You taught me that. I’m used to it at this point.” He explained and the thought that anything you said actually stuck in that big head of his actually warmed your heart a little. Now your mind reeled with even more questions of what all that was about, what it was that could possibly have gotten him so angry, why Din had said what he had earlier, why it felt different this time, why it struck fear in you, why- 

You were so deep in thought you hadn’t realized the way your hand squeezed down on his until a low hiss broke through his modulator and your gaze flitted back down to his hands. Suddenly your sympathy for his wounds and need to care for them outweighed your curiosity as you muttered a whisper of an apology and touched the crown of your helmet to his briefly as you got up. The action was so quick, and instinctual you hardly even realized you had done it. But Paz had. It was over so fast he wondered if it might have been an accident but it made his heart skip a beat and his cheeks heat up behind his visor nonetheless.

“C’mon, let’s get you cleaned up, big man.” You say now, nodding in the direction of the exit when he didn’t follow you immediately. Too stunned in his place for his actions to keep up with his mind. At that he let out a huff as he heaved his undoubtedly aching body onto his feet and followed you out into the stone gilded corridors of the covert.

“I hear you’ve gone soft, Vizsla!” a voice you didn’t recognize shouted from the end of the hall. You squeezed Paz’s arm, a silent urge for him to stay put as you whipped around on your heel, sliding the staff from off of your back into your grip as you paced down the hallway to his pesterer. That softness he spoke of, and the juxtaposition of it to his hulking form had to be one of your favourite parts about him. You thought of the way his thumbs had grazed over the backs of your hands as you inspected his knuckles only moments ago, the tickle of his silk-like touch against yours and the way it made you tingle with some emotion you couldn’t quite place. The fact that it and the warmth that it brought to you could be strung into an insult made your blood boil. “I hear you can’t finish what you start!”

“You want to wind up in the same shape as the other guy?” you ask, pointing the stick in the direction where the victim of Paz’s most recent outburst had been lying under an hour ago. 

“What? You gonna get him to swoop in and fight your battles for you again, copikla?” He chuckled, taking a challenging step closer to you. Again? You thought, but you were too busy being insulted by his gross underestimation of both you and Paz to care.

“I wasn’t talking about him.” You threatened, jabbing the staff towards him with a practiced flourish, only stopping when it hovered just in front of his windpipe. You stayed like that for a few moments, maintaining eye contact for a menacingly long period of time before dropping your grip so the weapon rested at your side. “I think we’ve all seen enough action for one day.” You declare, not missing the opportunity to swing his heels out from beneath him in one swift motion of your staff as you turned to walk away. 

“You’re good with that thing.” Paz remarked, still slightly dumbfounded in his place. He knew you could fight. He had experienced it first hand before. But this time was different. The refinement with which you held your weapon and the elegance you possessed as you moved with it as though it was an extension of your own body was not lost on him. The tact to your words and the conviction in each step all the more enticing. And the fact that it was for him... Paz couldn’t deny that watching the whole ordeal unfold made his chest swell with pride, admiration and maybe a little bit of something else.

“I know.” He can hear the smirk in your voice as you rejoin him, not quite sure why his praise towards you and the way his gaze lingered on you made your stomach churn with nerves.

“Remind me not to vex you.” He notes when he finally finds the sense to fall into step beside you again.

“You would do well to remember that anyway, ori’jagyc.” You huff through a smile, bumping into him gently with your shoulder. 

And that was the tipping point. 

Every bit of tension that had been building in him since you had stepped into that ring and put everyone, including himself, in their place came bursting forth. He just had to do something. Tell you anything. To let you know how wild you drove him. To show you how much he appreciated you and how little he would be without you. To tell you about all the things that he would do for you if you would just ask. 

Before you knew it he was grabbing you by the elbow and dragging you into a darkened alcove away from prying eyes. The action may have been harsh but his touch was light when he pressed you to the cool stone wall, breathing ragged through his modulator.

“What he insulted, was your honour, verd’ika.” Paz said quite suddenly, voice breathless as though he couldn’t get the words out fast enough. “And that, I was not willing to let stand.” He admitted. Still struggling to gain your bearings, it took you a moment for your mind to catch up. He must have been continuing your conversation from before. The one that left your head spinning with so many questions. All at once that comment from before made sense now. Again. You thought. He had been fighting for you...

You softened at the thought of it. Here you had been, scolding him for falling back into old habits. Letting his rage get the better of him. Something you thought he had learned to control. Yet now, the thought that it was all for you, that you could drive such passion from him, made your breath catch in your lungs. It was one thing to fight for your own honour, something which had landed him in trouble countless times before, but another thing entirely to fight to protect someone else’s. You were glad he couldn’t see the tears that threatened to breach your eyes or the way your mouth gaped trying to find a response to him.

“I… I don’t know what to say...” You murmured back to him. He didn’t miss the way your voice caught in your throat. 

“You don’t have to say anything, cy-” He cut himself off abruptly and you felt heat rise up your neck until it licked at your cheeks and the bridge of your nose at the thought of what he had almost said.

“So that was all... for me?” You ask, your mind flitting back to the fury with which he threw his punches, the conviction and intensity behind them and suddenly you felt a similar feeling blooming in the cavity of your chest. Except instead of anger or rage to accompany it you felt an overwhelming urge to draw him as close to you as possible.

As if reading your mind his feet shuffled closer, the grip you hadn’t even realized was on your hip, slipped to the small of your back, your spine curving so your chest pressed flush against his as he towered over you. You supposed it could have been intimidating, the way his frame engulfed you, but instead an incredible sense of calm and security washed over you. Like you had just found refuge in the safest of sanctuaries and now you never wanted to leave. 

“There is nothing I wouldn’t do for you, meshla.” He said, bowing his head so he could kiss the crown of his helmet to yours. The exact way that hadn’t stopped playing through his head on repeat since the unceremonious bonk of your forehead to his minutes ago. He had never wished so hard that he could take it off as now in his heady daze of affection. That he could feel your skin on his, smell the scent that tangled in your hair and taste your lips against his own. Your arms slipped around the back of his neck, your eyes squeezing shut as you nuzzled into him and focused all of your attention on the feeling of your chest rising and falling in unison with his.

“I would do anything for you ...cyare.” You hum into him, a light teasing tone for the way he had choked on his words just a moment ago. 

You did that to him. 

You caused the covert’s most intimidating warrior to stutter on his words and his palms to sweat. A warm rumble rolls through his chest like thunder in a summer storm. It makes your lips pry upwards at the sound of it. 

Ori’jagyc. 

The nickname causes a hint of a laugh to bubble in the back of your throat when you’re trapped in his embrace like this. He’s warm and his arms are secure around you. His touch so feather-light on you that you wonder how it’s possible for him to strike fear in so many people when he turned around and treated you this way. 

Your ori’jagyc.

You supposed you had an answer for Din’s question now.

-- Mando’a Translations

Ori'buyce, kih'kovid - all helmet no head (usually used to talk to someone with an over-inflated sense of authority)

Alor - boss

Nar'sheb - like “shove it” but much stronger

Ori’jagyc - bully, swaggering big-mouth - someone who picks on someone smaller - lit. *big man* said sarcastically, applied equally to women 

Ni nu copaani kyr'amur ner vod - I would not willingly shed my brother's blood

Copikla - cutie (taken as an insult in mandalorian culture)

Verd’ika - little warrior

meshla - beautiful

Cyare - Beloved

[ masterlist ]

Permanent Taglist

I am aware that Paz is not a Pedro character. If you wish not to be tagged in Paz stories in the future let me know!

 @agirllovespasta @chaoticspaceidiot @engineeredfiction @pedropascalito  @dreamgirl-67 @wickedfrsgrl @hillarymurray4 @din-damn-djarin @yespolkadotkitty @wille-zarr @chaotic-noceur @oloreaa @this-cat-is-dea @marydjarin @roxypeanut @opheliaelysia @cryptkeepersoul @mrschiltoncat @prxtty-boah @aliciaxglasgow

Bucket Bois Taglist (Din, Paz)

@iamwarrenspeace @princessxkenobi @motleymoose @datmando​ @my-awakened-ghost​

Paz Vizsla Taglist

@maybege @pazvizslasgirl4ever​ @queenofheavenandhell​ @aeryntheofficial​ @hdlynn​ @corrupt-fvcker​ @holamor​ @astroberry​

[oof-big-oof]

ACOTAR and Setups Part II: Tamlin and Rhysand

SPOILERS: ACOTAR series (and Macbeth too ig)

Part 1: Feyre

In "Macbeth", Macbeth and Banquo are narrative foils to each other. While Banquo is loyal to the king and uses language of growth and imagery of nature when he speaks, the traitor Macbeth's words are full of references to destruction, fire, and unholy happenings. Foils are not just good ways to explore character traits, but also excellent for setting up conflicts and exploring the thematic concerns of the world.

I think it's safe to say Tamlin and Rhysand are foils. They have opposing imagery (spring, flowers and sun for Tamlin, winter, snow and night for Rhysand) and always stand in opposition to each other when it comes to Feyre's narrative, switching in and out of being the "bad guy" and the "good guy". But the way this is handled is .... eh.

I'm going to look at shifts in Feyre, Tamlin and Rhys that work of this foil - and try to look for when and how they were set up.

1. Feyre's shift - TW: discussions of abuse, mental health issues

In the first book, Tamlin is a source of protection and love for Feyre. But by the second book, Feyre is not only struggling with her PTSD but has begun to realise that life at the Spring Court as a dolled up accessory might not be for her. By the end of the book, she has found her place in the Night Court - by Rhysand's side. And honestly? Go girl! Go live up to your potential!

The problem arises with how this is done - that is, Sarah J Mass never does the brunt work of showing us why Feyre cares. It is plausible she is motivated by a desire to protect the human lands, but we never actually see that. There isn't a moment where she realises she needs to work for a greater good, or a moment she realises that she needs to protect those more vulnerable than her - instead, the narrative has her tolerating abuse until she finally has had enough.

Which is great. I have got to admit that I really like the explicit rejection of a happily ever after storyline for Feyre because it took away her agency. But we get this radical shift in character motivation from wanting to be protected and comfortable with those she loves to desiring agency and understanding of herself in two lines:

"The girl who had needed to be protected and who had craved stability and comfort... she had died Under the Mountain"

and

"I didn't know how to go back to those things. To being docile"

hhhhhh. I mean - if you have to say it that explicitly, you're already doing something wrong. But also, why? We never see Feyre struggling with herself in her new body, and wondering why she does not want the same things as she did when she was a human, never see an impetus point for when her desires shifted.

But honestly? I don't mind Feyre's arc. I think it's a bit confused and lacks clarity or intent, and as a result, it is harder to root for her because you don't quite know what she wants, but I think it's still quite good. Where I really have problems are with Tamlin ad Rhys.

2. Tamlin - TW: discussions of abuse, mental health issues

I am not a fan of Tamlin's arc. You could argue that it is part of the thematic message of the series: that things are not as they seem. Tamlin is the wolf to the savour to the abuser, Rhysand is the "most beautiful man " Feyre had ever seen to Amarantha's monster to Feyre's eventual mate. But - the constant twists are unnecessary, more importantly, they and have little to no foreshadowing and just seem like retcons- making it seem as if they are there to keep the audience guessing rather than genuine plot progressions. This becomes even more obvious when the series abandons its core theme of "appearance vs reality" altogether, and as a result loses a lot of its cohesion: a direct consequence of having a bad setup.

His reason for doing the abusive things he does is conveyed to us in two lines, in the same monologue that Feyre's motivation is:

"Tamlin had gotten his powers back, had become whole again - become that protector and provider he wished to be"

Sure. He was much more powerful than Feyre when they first met, so I am having a hard time buying it is the return of the powers that his making him act this way. We know that his actions come from a genuine desire to protect Feyre - this is the guy that was willing to sacrifice his life multiple times and the future of his entire court to keep her safe. The only justification we have left then for the way he acts is that his PTSD, borne out of the trauma and torture he underwent and watched Feyre undergo changed him in some way.

This is why the endless villainizing of Tamlin makes me really uncomfortable. While it is true that the abused can become the abuser, and figuring out how to help them while protecting yourself is something that absolutely needs to be discussed and explored - the way it is done with Tamlin is horrendous because he is never given a chance to heal. Instead, he is thrown from plot point to plot point, an eternal punching bag for the Inner Circle and others to seem morally superior in front of.

And his treatment of Feyre is just weird. If he's so concerned about her safety - why does he not wake up when she has nightmares? Is he instead trying to pretend like everything is okay - if so why does he give Feyre an escort of guards? If his core motivation is protecting Feyre at all costs - why does he lash out at her?? And the text really tries to tell us how to feel about him in this regard, but it doesn't do it very well. For example, take the scene where Tamlin says "There is no such thing as a High Lady". Feyre a second before expressed her desire not to take on any responsibility, and Tamlin responded with this - and the text really makes us want to hate him for it, but all you can see is a person who is perhaps not the best at reading subtext trying his best.

In conclusion - Tamlin's shift to the villain of the narrative is hamhanded and underexplained, making it hard to genuinely hate him, and further confusing the narrative.

3. Rhys the foil gets the girl - TW: discussions of abuse, sexual assault mental health issues

Rhysand in the first book is interesting - he clearly has a heart and a soft spot for Feyre but is also a schemer with dubious motives that drugs and sexually harasses Feyre. There are places in the set up where we understand he cares - but never where we can begin to see he might be a genuine paragon of virtue.

And I will address this more in my post on ACOMAF, but the point I am trying to make here is: we are told through the constantly opposing imagery that Rhys and Tamlin are wolds apart - but never actually given examples of how. Rhys is said to be different from Tamlin because he respects Feyre's choice - but he drugs her in a bunch of weird scenes (that serve no clear narrative purpose by the way - like what was he trying to achieve? why he couldn't he just let Feyre in on that part of the plan?) and withholds information from her about life-threatening situations. Rhys is said to pull less rank - but we multiple times see others defer to him, especially in later books, and never actually see rank being enforced in Tamlin's court with his treatment of Lucien (many times described as his partner, and openly questioning him) and later Ianthe. Rhys is said to have less archaic laws in opposition to Tamlin's Tithe - but he abandons the Court of Nightmares to the monsters who rule it, and never takes serious actions against the Illyrian people who clip of women's wings, and a lot of Tamlin's idea of racial superiority and general superiority just come completely out of left field in the middle of ACOMAF.

Both of them are problematic - it's just that the text tells us to root for one, without actually showing us how one is better, or setting up any clear ideological difference between them. And that cheapens Feyre's character shift and lessen the efficacy of the foil - turning it into Feyre hopping from one lover to the other with little to no character consistency and no nuanced exploration of the theme of the series or trauma.

[alloftheimaginesblog]

Stupid Sometimes {Plus Size Reader x Tony Stark}

Plot: Tony Stark praises your curves, with no ill intent, but it upsets you because of past experiences. Once he realises that he’s upset you, he tries to show you he’s sorry.

Character: Plus Size Gender Neutral Reader x Tony Stark

Part of my Plus Size Reader x Character Series!

Requested by lilacprincessofrecovery

Every day, Tony made some sort of comment. Usually some form of ‘compliment’ that focussed on your body. Being plus size, Tony liked to compliment you on your confidence, the way you rocked outfits and how you looked. It wasn’t made to sleazy and nine times out of ten, it never came across sleazy. It was made to boost your ego and give you a pep in your step however... it never usually made you feel that way.

All your life, you’d had people talk about your weight; obsess over your health and offer insults in the form of advice. All your life, people put you down, mocked you and told you to lose weight when really, your body was none of their concern. It hurt you a lot then and it hurt you a lot now. They would those types of comments where you’d think about it for days afterwards, thinking you weren’t good enough and neither skinny nor pretty enough. It was horrible. You thought that as you grew up and became an adult, people would focus less on your weight.

Tony didn’t mean to offend or upset you. There was absolutely no malice or ill intent behind his words. He genuinely thought he was being a good friend, how was he to know that you’d had terrible experiences with people focussing on your weight all of your life and he never helped the issue? Even positive focus upset you because again, why did people need to comment on your body and your weight all the time? It’s like when you’ve got a big zit on the end of your nose, you know it’s there, other people know it’s there; why focus on it and cause further embarrassment?

Tony had walked past you as you made lunch in the kitchen and smiled, “I love your confidence in that outfit,” he said as he popped a grape into his mouth, “Other people might not think they can pull an outfit like that off, people tend to think that bigger people can’t pull that stuff off but you can. You rock it.” He thought he was helping, he thought he was being a nice friend to you... that was until, you burst into tears.

You hadn’t meant to get so emotional over it but it was becoming increasingly upsetting as the days went on until you couldn’t take it anymore and until you just burst into tears whilst making a sandwich. Tony stood, kind of awkwardly gawking at you, as he tried to understand the situation. 

“What happened?” He asked, eyebrows furrowing together in concern, “Was it me?” All you could do was nod and Tony let out a long sigh, “Was it this morning? I thought you found it funny when I try and make Banner ‘Hulk out’!” You shook your head, wiping your tears as you struggled to gain your composure. Tony frowned, oblivious to the real issue.

“It’s-It’s okay,” you sniffed as you grabbed a tissue and swatted your hand, “I’m just being stupid.” You didn’t like confrontation, you didn’t like getting upset in front of people so you tried to brush it off.

Tony, however, wasn’t having any of it, “No,” he said, catching your wrist gently, “Talk to me... I’ve upset you and I want to make it right.” You sighed and nodded. Tony gave you a small smile, “Come, we’ll sit on the balcony and get fresh air. You can take all the time you need.” You let him lead you outside and let him pull up two chairs for you both. Over the years of knowing Tony, you were one of the few people who had the privilege to see his softer and more caring side. It was nice.

Tony didn’t speak and instead allowed you the time to calm down and gather your thoughts. When you eventually did speak, he turned to face you, “It was what you said in the kitchen that upset me,” you said slowly.

“About Banner?” You shook your head.

“About my outfit and weight,” you sniffed, looking anywhere but at him.

He frowned, once again confused, “I was telling you how good you looked - it wasn’t meant to upset you.”

“I know,” you said and you did know that he truly didn’t mean to upset you, “I know you meant it as a compliment but... I don’t like that sort of stuff.”

“You don’t like compliments?”

“I don’t like compliments centred around my body or weight,” you corrected him. He leaned forwards, curiously, “Tony, all my life people focussed on my weight. They told me I was too heavy, that I was a whale, that I should go on a diet. People would say ‘you’d be prettier if you were skinny’ to me thinking that it was a compliment. People constantly thought they had a say in my weight and the way my body looked.”

Realisation began to dawn on Tony as he muttered a small ‘oh’.

“You’re only trying to be nice and boost my confidence, I get that and I appreciate the intent but... my weight isn’t your concern, nor anybody else’s; why should you or anyone else focus on it and only talk about it? I had years of bad experiences like that which have severely impacted on me negatively... So, even though I know you don’t mean it to be upsetting-”

“It comes across like you need my approval to look a certain way; like I have a say in what your weight should be or what your body should look like.” Tony nodded, “Why didn’t you tell me sooner? I would’ve stopped...”

You shrugged, “I thought I could deal with it but... I obviously can’t.”

Tony reached out, grabbing your hands and rubbing his thumbs across your knuckles gently. He looked deep into your eyes as he apologised, “I’m sorry. I truly am. I’m stupid sometimes. I make stupid comments sometimes. I can be a right dick sometimes. What I don’t want to be is the person who hurts you. I am really sorry. I promise you, from now on I won’t comment on your body or weight. I’ll compliment you in other ways.”

It meant a lot to you that he said that, it meant a lot that he understood that he upset you and instead, apologised. You thanked him for his apology, squeezing his hands. In a matter of minutes, the issue had been resolved and dropped and you found yourselves talking about other things but Tony couldn’t get the fact he’d upset you that much out of his head.

The next day, you woke up feeling a lot better about the situation. Tony had been a real gem; he’d apologised and understood straight away. He told you that he’d never had those experiences and he was sorry for not thinking the comments through properly. It was nice to hear, it was nice that someone listened to your feelings about those types of comments instead of brushing you off.

When you opened your eyes, you were surprised to see that you were surrounded by flowers. You sat up, looking around the room, seeing more than a dozen bouquets of flowers - all different breeds and colours - around the room. You were confused, and a little weirded out that someone was in your room as you slept, when you noticed an envelope on your bedside table. You opened it curiously.

Dearest (y/n),

After yesterday, I couldn’t stop thinking about how much I’d upset you so I wanted to do something nice for you. I wanted you to wake up to a beautiful view of your favourite types of flowers.

I am truly sorry about it all and I do hope that you’ll forgive me.

If not, I’ll make you a wonderful breakfast of pancakes, syrup and bacon when you wake up and surely that’ll make you forgive me... If it doesn’t, I’m sure I can conjure up another surprise.

I can compliment you one thousand other ways but I’ll only list a few. I admire your courage and your strength. I appreciate that you listen to me and when I was having bad nightmares and panic attacks, I appreciated that you stayed up with me to talk about them or not talk about them - depending on how I felt. I love that we have a similar type of humour - you’re the best when it comes to a partner for pranks. I admire your kindness and your patience - you have the patience of a saint. I enjoy being your friend and it makes me happy that we’re so close and I daresay that this experience will bring us closer together. You’re beautiful - but you don’t need me to tell you that.

I do hope you forgive me,

T.S

Tears welled in your eyes as you finished the letter. He was someone who made stupid comments sometimes and could be stupid sometimes but he was sweet and kind and when he cared about someone, he truly did care. You manvoured your way around the flowers and rushed out of your bedroom. You found him standing in the kitchen drinking coffee.

“You’re up!” He grinned, “Pancake- oomph!” You crashed into him, hugging him tightly, almost knocking him off of his feet at the force of which you charged. You murmured a small ‘thank you’ into his shoulder as you hugged him, “I take it you liked your flowers then.”

You let go a few seconds later, “I loved it, Tony. I loved your letter too. You didn’t have to, you know. I’d forgiven you yesterday.”

Tony smiled, “I know but I wanted to make sure you knew how sorry I was... Now... Pancakes?”

[wastelandlovingscenarios]

Love your blog. It’s ✨Immaculate ✨. How would companions (+preston) and anyone you wanna add react around a preferably f!sole that they have a HUGE crush on? For example; what are the little actions or habits they do?

omg, this request made me happy and i enjoyed writing it! i love this so much. thank you for requesting anon, please enjoy! this was probably one of my longest reacts ever written.

anddddd i added sturges and x6 just cause.. i.. love them.. 😶❤️

-

Danse:

he’s never had a real crush before and you bet your fucking life that he has no idea how to deal with it. he wouldn’t notice the crush at first and would be completely oblivious to it until he found himself growing strangely flustered at sole whenever they were in his presence. everything they did, from modding power armor to simply just staring at him with their breathtaking features, always pulled the paladin out of reality, making his heart beat in all different directions and forced him to become speechless even if he had a million things to say. upon realizing that he may be harboring feelings much more than friendship for his long term partner, he becomes more attentive and protective towards sole, even if it goes out of his notice. he would find himself taking over her tasks in sanctuary despite her pleas so she can rest a little longer and take a break from all her responsibilities. danse would become more frantic over soles health, often scolding her about the importance of self care whenever he noticed that she was neglecting it and if she refused to listen, then he’d take matters in his own hands. he’d grow abnormally nervous and concerned whenever sole was away without him for too long and would literally run over to her the minute she’d come home, bombarding her with a million questions before his worries could completely subside. deep down, danse knew he wanted to shield sole from the dangers they faced everyday and pry her away from any kind of pain that could be inflicted on her. he figured it was impossible but knew damn well he could at least try, even if it killed him. soon enough, his crush for sole would grow painfully obvious and knew that he’d have to confront her about it when she started picking up signs.

Deacon:

terrified is an understatement. he found himself panicking at the thought of being attached to someone once again and tried to do everything in the book to perish those emotions as quickly as it came. unfortunately for him, no matter how much he pulled away from sole, he always found a way back to her despite his mind screaming at him to escape. god knows he wouldn’t be able to; not with that dammed smile, perfect personality, and smart mouth. now that she was there existing in his mind rent free, there was no turning back no matter how hard he tried. regardless of his newfound feelings, he’d still continue to act normal around sole, often pulling jokes here and there but everytime he’d try to friskilly flirt with them like he used to, his cheeks would go visibly red and his mouth would become dry whenever sole played along with his games. once he accepted the fact that he was in love and ready to move on, he’d spend every waking moment with her, trying to make her laugh whenever they were together just so he could see their smile. even if he tried to stray away from it, he became more affectionate towards sole, often letting his touches touches linger longer than necessary, offering a shoulder to her whenever she needed it, and just being the rock everytime life decided to knock her down. he’d observe sole a lot, noting down whatever she seemed to have interest in and all the details, small or vast, he could capture of her. remember that necklace you wanted when you looked at a run down magazine at a shop? deacons got you covered. feeling sad? he’d be kicking through that door with an armful of fancy lad cakes before sole could shed a tear. he’s more than willing to go out of his way for sole without a second thought just to ensure shes happy and safe in this chaotic world.

Hancock:

hancocks a natural flirt, it’s definitely obvious by now and sole knew it herself since the day she stepped in goodneighbor. if he wasn’t flirting with her, he was often caught flirting with people he found attractive. after a while though, that habit would deteriorate the more he spent time with sole and got to know her better as a person instead of the commonwealth hero. the idea of one night stands and random hook ups didn’t appeal to him so much anymore as he leaned more into the idea of committing to sole and the possibility of what they could be. he’d find that his flirtatious comments would grow more genuine whenever it left his lips and that his actions were much more gentle and affectionate whenever they were together. his once provocative thoughts about her would be replaced with more innocent ones and he’d constantly wondered how her lips would feel against his instead of observing her ass in that vault suit like he normally would. hancock would often give sole pet names, such as sunshine and sweetheart, and would completely abolish the nickname ‘sister’, pushing it away from his vocabulary as time went by. hancock would constantly tease sole with comments or actions, often telling her she’s absolutely beautiful to caressing her face gently just to see the sight of her wide eyed and flushed with his own very eyes. that image of her was definitely a sight for sore eyes- it made his heart swell with love and awe, a feeling he thought he’d never experience in his lifetime. he would give up anything in the commonwealth, even his love for chems, just to be with sole and stay by her side until the end of time.

Maccready:

he’s such a dork and is absolutely head over heels for sole the first time he realizes he has a thing for her. though he doesn’t go over the top to show he admires her or anything, it’s more than enough to display exactly what he feels for her. whenever they’re out on a mission, mac would always try to impress sole with anything he knows he’s capable of doing or exceeding just to catch her attention, even just for a moment. his suave and cocky attitude while doing so would immediately crash down into bits once sole sent him a dazzled grin or displayed her amazement at his skills. he would then become a flustered and anxious mess, stumbling over his sentences as he tried to pull himself together. mac would become more open with her, showing sole his interests excitedly, like his comic book collection, or telling her stories that he’s never told anyone besides lucy. he’d allow her to pry into his private life and is more than willing to have any type of conversation with her regardless of whether it was personal or just small talk. maccready would frequently gape at his companion with a lovestruck smile on his face and a dreamy glint in his eyes, admiring everything about her from her appearance to her personality. even if sole didn’t notice him doing so, others did and boy did he look like a lovesick teenager.

Nick Valentine:

it wouldn’t take nick forever to realize he had fallen in love with sole. though it’d take a while to accept, he’d eventually warm up to the idea, realizing that the more he pushed away from it, the worse the issue would become. after all, there’s no better way to confront a situation than to encounter it first hand. he’s really old school when having a crush on sole, mimicking prewar actions to show that he really cares for her outside of professionalism. nick would open doors for her, give her his coat whenever he caught her shudder, pick flowers from a garden to give to her, and overall just be an absolute gentleman. he’d literally drive ellie insane by talking about sole all the damn time, whether about professional matters or personal ones, and if her name ever slipped his lips one more time, ellie might just grab a book nearby and knock him unconscious just to catch a break. just like hancock, nick would push away the nicknames he usually used for her, such as kid/pal, and would instead replace it with ‘doll’ or ‘sweetheart’ - it seemed much more romantic and meaningful. he wouldn’t hide the fact that he has interest for sole and would make it known that he has intentions, but would never force sole if she wasn’t comfortable. luckily, she was more than comfortable.

Gage:

he would be in major denial with his feelings for sole. gage would assume it’s just a simple infatuation for the overboss and try his best to ignore the feelings that surfaced whenever she was around. there was just no way he was gonna commit to something he was uncertain of. as much as gage denied the truth, he couldn’t avoid the change of behavior that followed after that realization. he found himself defending the overboss more when someone badmouthed or threatened her and would go out of his way to kill them himself if they stepped a little too close for comfort. not for soles comfort - his comfort. whenever someone displayed any signs of affection or interest towards her, his eyes would shoot daggers directly at that person (who eventually backed away, intimidated) and his hands would clutch his rifle until his knuckles turned white. everytime sole felt down and let a few tears slip, he couldn’t bring himself to give her space like he once used to and would instead accompany her, attempting to ease her pain with small comments and a hand on the shoulder. the thought of being the person behind the one in charge soon faded into nothing as he caught himself saving sole more than once from the dangers that dared to meet her in his presence. he got more than few bullets and bruises while doing so and he found that he didn’t mind that at all. he’d let sole be affectionate to him; when she’d lay her head on his shoulder, let her hand brush against his when they were close, or lay a hand on his chest, he’d find himself enjoying it much more than he should and slowly began to crave it more. his previous thoughts of committing to her would switch entirely and he’d realize that maybe being in love for once wouldn’t be so bad after all.

Preston:

he’d come to accept his crush for the general pretty quickly. she was amazing and genuinely kind hearted after all, so there was absolutely no reason why he’d try to pull away from this feeling. prestons a huge sweetheart when it comes to sole, often complimenting the way she looked that day, sending her small comments of appreciation to know he’s grateful for her in his life, and would go as far as leaving them small trinkets hes found on his adventures, telling her that it reminded him of her. whenever sole was brought up into a conversation, he’d feel his ears perk up and he’d immediately butt in, praising her as a person and for all that she’s done for the commonwealth. he wants to make it known that she deserves more than what she is given and that all her deeds do not go unnoticed. everyone noticed the big smile on his face and the proud look in his eyes whenever he speaks about sole to others and would laugh at his joyful tone as he continued on. it’s almost identical to a child talking about their favorite toy on a show and tell event. he tries to give her the life she deserves by showing little acts of appreciation; leaving an extra box of dandy apples near her bedside so she had something to snack on, sparing a few extra caps to buy her a drink whenever they were out and about, and even cleaning up her room whenever he had the time to do so. in the end, everyone knew that sole had preston wrapped around her finger and anything she needed or desired, he was more than willing to make it happen to the best of his abilities.

Sturges:

sturges hesitates at first, believing that he’s nothing special compared to sole. it would take him a billion years before sole could actually look at him the way he looked at her, but comes to the conclusion that it wouldn’t hurt to try and pursue her. just like nick, sturges is an absolute gentleman to his core but shows it with different actions. instead of picking flowers and opening doors for sole, he’d focus on doing things that could benefit her in the long run. he’d mod whatever weapons or armor she left behind, ensuring that sole had the best of the best while venturing the wastelands and would try to upgrade her living space, adding anything that he knew would put sole more at ease whenever she came home. he would also guarantee there was an extra plate of freshly cooked food and a drink waiting for sole on her kitchen counter in case they decided to come home that night. before sole would go back out in the wasteland, he’d pack a special bag full of stimpacks, rad x, radaway, modified weapons, and other useful things she might need on her adventures, sending her away with a soft smile and a simple, “get home safe.” besides his actions, sturges would try to converse with sole more whenever he found the time to and find any excuse, even if ridiculous, to spend time with her, disregarding any plans he had that day.

X6:

the crush is absolutely foreign to him. he wouldn’t be able to utterly process the feeling at first, confused whether his systems were malfunctioning or not but would notice that his behavior would be drastically changing the more he walked the wastelands with her. he’d catch himself staring at sole longer than necessary, observing her features while she was distracted and allowed it to engrave every single part of his perplexed mind. he’d talk less, unconsciously taking in sole’s voice whenever they spoke and letting that melodious sound replay in his head for an unhealthy amount of time. with this new crush came new emotions he was never programmed to experience - fear, worry, happiness and relief. the strange thing was, it would only rise around her. whenever she was hurt or away, he felt fear and concern, whenever she was laughing and smiling, he felt a sense of happiness and the minute she’d come home from a dangerous part of a mission, he’d feel a wave of relief. he yearned to know more about her outside of professionalism, asking questions about her personal life and interests as he became more curious. as sole opened up more to him and let him see the better side of her - the one that was playful and was full of smiles and laughter - he’d feel the strong heartbeat bang against his chest for the first time in his life. once he realized he had it bad for sole, he was too far into the rabbit hole to ever turn back.

[thelovelyghostwriter]

KuraNeon ABC Fluff Headcanons

uThis ABC is taken from this post. I was thinking, hey, what about KuraNeon? 

[Yessss... They have a special attack together on one of the mobile games - not the mobage cards by the way]

Let’s go!

A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

Neon’s always bored, given that Kurapika is the one who is doing all the work. She’s often delighted to spend time with him, particularly shopping. She likes to shop for clothes, wearing cute outfits and asking him his opinion of it. She’s a tease and we know it. Sometimes she would purposely try on some racy outift for him to ogle at. 

For Kurapika, he doesn’t really have a particular favourite activity with her. He’s just happy to spend time with her. 

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

At first they weren’t very close. Kurapika only focused on her flesh-collecting hobby that he disagrees with and Neon finds his serious working attitude boring and she didn’t really care about him. Ironically, the traits that each of them has that the other doesn’t is what draws them to each other. 

After spending time together, Kurapika finds her eccentric view on her life interesting, even if he does not agree with them. He likes how she’s happy-go-lucky and just lives in the present, uncaring about what the future brings. Which is kinda ironic for someone who can predict the future. 

Neon, on the other hand, finds his stern and down-to-business attitude really amusing. She likes how genuinely concerned he gets in doing the job done and she likes it when he teaches her things that she doesn’t know about. She also catches the glimpse of him being playful, it’s so rare and she likes it when he relaxes once in a while. He’s also really sassy when he wants to and she likes bantering with him. 

For physical traits, Kurapika is in denial. She’s one of the few girls he interacted with and he finds her really adorable and pretty. He likes how she’s always wearing long sleeves and it all leads to a lot of imagination. Her eyes also drives him crazy because it holds so much naivety that he wants to stain. 

Neon finds Kurapika a pretty boy. She likes his soft blond locks and the red earrings that he wears. She thinks it looks good on him. If she knows that he is a Kurta, she loves those pretty eyes (especially when they’re having sex). The first time Neon sees Kurapika in a tuxedo, her gaze will linger because he looks bonafide yummy in it. 

C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?

I don’t know what panic attack is like so I will not address that. 

Kurapika is the type that tries to rationalize things (even though he’s impulsive as shit). So whenever Neon feels down, he will listen to her issues. He will try to understand her situation, analyse it and give her a few suggestions on what she can do. If it’s a problem that cannot be solved practically and she’s being confused/overwhelmed, he will comfort her by saying “it’s okay to feel this way”, he’ll tell her why she’s possibly feeling this way with scientific stuff and whatnot. He’ll find reasons to reassure her that it’s not the end of the world, and that he’ll always be there for her. 

For Neon, Kurapika’s issues are deep. Sometimes he won’t even tell it to her. She won’t press him for answers, but she’ll let him hold her. She’ll hug him when he needs comfort. She’ll give him soft kisses on his forehead. She’ll try to distract him from feeling down by getting him to do fun activities like playing chessboard games until he gets better. If he’s working too much, she’ll ensure that he takes breaks by either sleeping, going out with her or you know, the old-fashioned way to de-stress ;) 

D reams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?

For Neon, she’s not too concerned of the future. To her, it’s just... like that. She goes with the flow of the events and the growth of her connection with Kurapika just like a river. Whatever happens, happens. 

Haha, it reminds me of the lullaby my mom used to sing - Que sera, sera. Whatever will be, will be. The future's not ours to see. Que sera, sera.

For Kurapika, it’s bleak. This guy has always been a bag full of worry - which includes the future of his relationship with Neon. Initially, he did not plan to be in this sort of relation with Neon (his employer’s daughter, I might add). At first, he thought he’d marry her for practical reasons and earning her father’s trust, so that he can gain money in order to buy back some of his clan’s eyes. 

His relationship with her becomes something a little more than that. He hates himself for being “distracted” or even indulging in that sort of happiness when he’s supposed to be on a mission. As a Last Kurta, he has some sort of survivor’s guilt. He thinks that if he lives on and forgets about bringing justice to his clan, he is bringing disgrace to them. He thinks he doesn’t deserve to live happily. Especially with a flesh collector. He thinks that it’s his duty as the last survivor to collect their eyes and bring them the justice they deserve. 

Yet, he sticks around because this is the only thing that keeps him together and prevents him from sinking while trying to carry out this mission. He knows that one day, eventually, this relationship and his mission will become mutually exclusive, and he has to pick one of them. And that will be his mission. 

However, whenever he tries to look into the further future after his mission ends, he sees nothing. After his mission, he doesn’t see anything to live for. This goes back to his wishes and thinking if it’s possible to ever live for something else after this whole mission of his is over - which is to be in a relationship with Neon. 

It’s a paradox. His dilemma is indeed confusing and mentally straining. 

E qual - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?

Neon is rather passive. She relies on him when it comes for down-to-Earth decisions and she just tags along (she doesn’t care about the boring financial stuff). Ever since Neon lost her ability, he’s the one earning money for them. (He’s kinda like her sugar daddy ahahahha). He loves to be in-charge anyway, given how quickly he got promoted from a mere employee, to a head bodyguard and finally the head of her family.  

She does influence him in certain decisions when she suggests it, or demands him what she wants. Depending on how reasonable her request/demands, he will either comply to make her happy or be firm with her by reasoning/compromising with her. Neon will sometimes just pout and agree with it hesitantly, other times she’ll throw a tantrum (and Kurapika has to deal with that, and maybe even “punish” her to discipline her KEKEKEK). 

So yes, Kurapika is the dominant one in the relationship because he does a good job in being the role of providing for his partner (and he’s the dom in the bedroom). 

F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

OMG. Neon has temper tantrums and impatient; and Kurapika’s worse - he’s stubborn and he has a very bad anger management. It’s like a volcano meeting a thunderstorm. 

When they fight, they fight big time. Sometimes it’s about Neon’s unreasonable demands/spoilt attitude, sometimes it’s Kurapika’s secretive behaviour or his neuroticism that leads to an argument. 

After the fight, both of them will be grumpy towards each other and Neon will refuse to talk to him, glaring at him. Kurapika will be too hard-headed to talk first. Eventually, both will kinda miss each other’s presence. They will forgive each other once they realise that the fight they had was not worth breaking up the relationship. 

G ratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

They don’t usually express their gratitude explicitly. At first, they kinda just take it for granted and don’t really think too deeply about it. Especially for Neon, she’s the type of girl that likes luxury and she enjoys all the materialistic goods that Kurapika gives her. After a few months where it really gets serious, she thinks about all the things that Kurapika has done for her - protection, financial security and pretty much, everything for her. I have this headcanon where she does those tiny surprises for him on occasions (e.g. his birthdays) just to tell him how much she appreciates what he’s doing for her. 

H onesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?

Neon is more open to him whenever he asks. Besides, she can’t really lie or keep secrets from him because he’s sharp. 

As for Kurapika, he’s rather secretive and even hid his ethnic identity to her. He doesn’t tell her things and it takes a while for him to open up. This can be a problem because once he admits to Neon, she is rather upset. She doesn’t like how her father lies to her all the time and will be very disappointed in Kurapika when she uncovers his motivations for being hired under her employment initially. 

I nspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

I think for both of them, they are both ends of the spectrum. So definitely, along the way, they will influence each other. 

Kurapika will teach Neon to be more mindful and caring of those around her. He will try to tell her why sympathising with the dead is as important as caring for the living (because baby girl just likes to make the living happy). 

For Kurapika, Neon will get him to at least live in the present and enjoy it, because this boy faces a lot of trauma in his past and constantly worries about the future. Neon will try to get him to relax from time to time, be happy with the ever-present. 

J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

Neon doesn’t really get jealous because Kurapika is very much focused on her. She knows these bitches aren’t even her competition. Even though he attracts attention as he is a pretty boy, he’s very cold towards them, which actually makes a lot of them disinterested. 

As for Kurapika... this man is extremely possessive. He didn’t like the fact that Chrollo talked to Neon that one time in the September auction, and he wanted to know every detail of what happened. Neon gets suitors from the mafia community and he makes sure none of them makes contact with her. He’s also paranoid as hell whenever she talks to a guy. Sometimes Neon finds it suffocating (they even fight about it at times), but she appreciates his overprotective nature and sometimes even teases him about it.

K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

Their first kiss was rather awkward. Neon and Kurapika are still young. Neon was kinda heavily guarded so she didn’t have the opportunity to date a guy. She doesn’t seem like she’s interested either. The girl just minds her business and doesn’t seem to appreciate ingenuine attention from men. Kurapika is pretty focused on his mission for his clan so I doubt he dated either. So yes, when they first kissed, it was literally their first kiss. It was soft, short and sweet. And hella awkward because both of them weren’t sure what they were doing. 

They will get good at kissing as time passes by. They just have to keep practising by kissing each other HAHA. 

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

HAHA. I actually don’t see this couple saying “I love you” to one another - at least for Kurapika’s part. Neon is like 50-50. They pretty much just grow attached to each other over time and expressed their feelings by a kiss or something. 

M arriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?

Fam. Let me tell you something real quick. Usually, for other pairings, it’s they become close friends, then date, then get married. This pairing is founded by a marriage theory. HAHAH. 

It’s a common KuraNeon headcanon where they have an arranged marriage due to some mafia business. At first it will be like any arranged marriage since it was for practical reasons. They go through the motions, play the role of a traditional husband and wife. Then they get it all mixed up with the emotions and then fall in love. They proceed to become a full-fledge consummated marriage relationship and have kids. 

N icknames - What do they call their s/o?

Kurapika isn’t really big on the nicknames. It’s more on how he goes from calling her “Boss”, to “Miss Neon” and eventually just her name as he got more comfortable with her. 

For Neon, she calls him Kurapika, most of the time. Only when they are in the bedroom, she calls him Daddy. She even puts his contact name on her phone as that. Kurapika was repulsed by it at first, but she was often a playful sub whenever she calls him that. It makes him feel powerful. HAHAHA. Kinky. 

O n Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

Both of them can’t really define what love is, or understand what they’re feeling when it first hit them. It’s obvious for everyone - Linssen and the rest of Kurapika’s underlings. They know that their boss is in love with his wife and is sincere about their marriage. Neon just feels happier with his company and she did question it at one point, but decides that it’s for the best to continue and go with the flow. For Kurapika, when he realised that he’s suddenly happier, he’s scared. He’s not sure if he should be feeling happiness at all. He’s always afraid that the fiery wrath within him would die out. He wanted to remove that feeling. A man like him shouldn’t spare any time for love. But he stays anyway because it benefits him. 

Neon’s love language is gifts and spending time with someone. She sees gift-giving as something where someone spends the money (which is earned by the hours they spent working) as precious and flattering for her. She dislikes it when the gift is ingenuine. Kurapika knows this and gives her all sorts of things to impress her. Neon also gives back gifts whenever she can. When she shops, she started to shop not only for herself, but enjoys thinking about what she can buy for Kurapika. Kurapika is a busy man, so Neon is often excited whenever he takes off-days to do fun activities with her. 

For Kurapika, he’s more of an action guy than words. Aside from giving gifts for her, he shows his affections by doing what he thinks it’s best for both of them. This means protecting her from any harm and making sure they’re financially stable. 

Both of them also like to be physically intimate with one another to show their affections. 

P DA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?

Kurapika is not very open about their relationship in public. Dude is too shy to do PDA. He thinks it’s none of anyone’s business when it comes to his relationship. Neon on the other hand, don’t really care what people think. She will hold his arm whenever they go out, and Kurapika will just let her. He blushes a little whenever she does peck kisses on him in public or in front of their employees. Linssen and the rest will just snigger and tease their Bosses, leaving Kurapika irritated. 

Q uirk - Some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship.

Kurapika’s chains. Uhm, joke lmao. He can’t wrap her around his chains even if he wants to. They like to do bondage but they have to use clothes or some other type.

R omance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?

I’d say they are rather an unconventional couple, but their activities are that of a cliche couple. Kurapika is romantic in a sense that he takes her out to dinner, give her gifts and pretty much goes out with her to make her happy. Neon, of course, the ever-so indulgent brat that she is, likes to be pampered. They are okay with a routine-type of relationship, although once in a while, Neon adds in a surprise to make it interesting. 

S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?

Neon doesn’t really have a goal. She’s more onto goods and her desires are often short-lived. Kurapika tries his best to support her in what she wants, given that they are reasonable. 

For Kurapika, his goal will always be vengeance and collecting the eyes of his brethren. His marriage to Neon supports that, even if she is unaware of it. Being the head of her family helps him get the power, influence and money to negotiate (and buy) his clan’s eyes. 

If Neon does find out about his goals, I think she’ll feel disoriented. She may have an inkling that he is marrying due to some motivations that are hidden; but she was unaware it was this drastic. She will be upset that he wasn’t fully honest, and may have mixed feelings collecting his clan’s eyes. She doesn’t care for dead people, but she does care about living humans and it’s important to Kurapika, who is alive. After a while, she will calm down. I don’t see her actively supporting him, maybe trying to use connections and her ways as a flesh collector to help him find the Scarlet Eye sets. As for the Spiders part, I think she’ll be more of a foil to that so I think she’ll just let him do whatever he’s supposed to do. 

As for believing in him, Neon knows that he’s intelligent and he’s one of the bodyguards that are still alive. She had her fair share of bodyguards who just drop dead like flies, so she assumes Kurapika must be strong enough to still be alive and kicking. She is also aware that he has his ways of influencing people, given that her father believes in him. Therefore, she believes in him too. She also acknowledges that Kurapika saved their asses from being broke, when her father was freaking out. So definitely, she knows that he is very capable of running their organisation. 

T hrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?

I think I already answered this in the “R” for “Romance”. 

But if I may add an NSFW... 

Well, certainly they do have their own fixed of kinks ahhaha. They start out as being kinda vanilla and just make out, then have some good ol’ missionary sex. And then, Neon, being a mischievous girl that she is, seeks out to try new things. She starts out by calling him “Daddy” and being very bratty/teasing... just to let out his inner dom in the bedroom. She also prompts him to do bondage on her because well, the chains he wears gives them ideas HAHA. Neon will just act like the total brat that needs to be subdued and disciplined; and Kurapika will follow. He likes to be in control; and he finds all sorts of ways to tame his bratty wife sexually. Kurapika is deep down kinky but he doesn’t admit it; and Neon nudges him towards that direction and everything just flows. 

U nderstanding - How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?

Okay. So... this is one of the main issues with their relationship. But this is what, I believe, makes it so interesting yet difficult to write a slowburn canon-compliant fiction of them. 

Neon doesn’t understand him well because she mostly minds her business and is more self-centred. And the way she empathise with people is different from how Kurapika expects her to be. Canonically, they are the polar opposite. Neon (and Light Nostrade) acted as a foil in the YorkNew City. Neon values the life of the living, breathing people; and not giving two cents about the people that had died. Kurapika, on the other hand, mourns for his dead clan. 

At first, Kurapika wanted to change the way she thinks - which is, of course, it kinda fails. Her hobby is in direct conflict of his beliefs. 

While canonically, he straightaway knew her situation (that conversation he had with Basho explaining that it was the father that is using the daughter, not the other way round), it was not indicated if he sympathises with her. He was just very task-focused to impress Light Nostrade and gain his trust, which is to protect his daughter.  

It definitely took a while for him to know her aside from being a “flesh collector” and the “bratty girl”. Maybe he got to know her more as a person, who is not so far from his age. 

As for Neon, I imagine her whining about Kurapika’s strict behaviour as a bodyguard, and finding him a bit boring to converse with due to his serious attitude while working. 

This couple really needs a LOT of patience with one another and time for them to bond. 

V alue - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?

I think I had already addressed this in the “D - Dreams” section. 

W ild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.

Neon and Kurapika initially never considered having kids, until Kurapika knocked her up and they have their first son. They named their first son Pairo. They have like, 3 to 5 subsequent kids, depending on how many kids you want them to go for. No matter how many girls and boys they have, all of them have Scarlet Eyes. 

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

Oh yes. They do enjoy kissing and cuddling. And sex. But yeah, they don’t usually do PDA because Kurapika is rather shy about that. But behind closed doors? They’re doing more than kisses and cuddling - if you know what I mean. 

Y earning - How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?

They will be upset. They will try to get themselves busy. For Neon, she will shop and play card games with her fellow attendants to get her mind off of him. She will wonder how he’s been, send him text messages and nudes while at work and complain about how much of a workaholic this guy is. 

For Kurapika, usually he’s the one away for either a business trip or on his way across the world to obtain another set of the Scarlet Eyes. He will think about her, it irritates him because missing her distracts him from the task at hand and he can’t help it. He’ll call her at some points of the day to just hear her voice and ask her well-being, to check whether everything in the mansion is fine or not. 

Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship? If so, what kind of?

Kurapika is persuasive in getting what he wants. That includes doing all sorts of tricks and nefarious ways to protect their relationship. As for Neon, if someone is blocking them, she will try to eliminate it by making demands and throw tantrums. 

However, they won’t admit it. They will find some excuse to jusify their behaviour, which often fails. 

Also, special thanks to @anotherworldash for helping me with Y and Z.