#and of course... my favorite princess with 50 mental illnesses...

[plutorine]

i'm pretty sure there are articles/essays written about this already, but i really want to write about and touch on the "fatherless" motif (whether that be in the form of loss from death, negligence, absence, etc.) that dostoevsky uses for most of his characters with some elements of astrology (because i've seen dostoevsky's chart)

[binkysteebnpewter]

All 85 of em

I despise you a little

1. Are looks important in a relationship?

Not to me, really. I value someone’s outlook on life and attitude more than something that will continually change as we age.

2. Are relationships ever worth it?

Yes. I believe so, personally. I won’t date if I can’t see myself planning to marry her in the future. I’ve stated it before, but Home is what I want to find in life. Home is a person, to me. Home is someone I feel safe and loved by, respected on equal ground— someone who can be completely comfortable and themselves with me, and vice versa.

3. Are you a virgin?

No, but it wasn’t consentually lost.

4. Are you in a relationship?

Yes 🥺💗 I’m dating my princess, @andyl394

5. Are you in love?

Love is a very strong word, I used it lightly for so many years and still sometimes do— but I’d say I’m falling in love.

I believe you never fall in love like it’s a place you sit, I believe you are always falling in love with whomever you date because everyday you wake up a different person then you were the day before.

6. Are you single this year?

No 🥺💗 I have my lovely baby Andy

7. Can you commit to one person?

Yep ✨

8. Describe your crush

She’s really sweet, she has really pretty hair. She’s respectful and adorable. Her laughing and giggles sound like cute little bells, and her smile is so, so bright.

9. Describe your perfect mate

Respectful, Thoughtful, Communicative, and Understanding.

10. Do you believe in love at first sight?

Somewhat, I suppose. I believe you can begin to fall in love, but never really immediately be in love at only a first look— but I guess I base this on the fact I value a persons outlook and attitude more than their appearance.

11. Do you ever want to get married?

Yes. I’d love to get married one day.

12. Do you forgive betrayal?

I guess it would really depend on what they had done to me.

13. Do you get jealous easily?

Not really. I’m not a very jealous person.

14. Do you have a crush on anyone?

MY PRINCESS 🥺💗 she’s my girl 😚

15. Do you have any piercings?

I have your regular ear piercings 🤷🏻‍♀️

16. Do you have any tattoos?

Not yet 😔

17. Do you like kissing in public?

I’m okay with it, I have nothing against it even though I’m very easy to embarrass

20. Do you shower every day?

Yes, I work on a farm.

21. Do you think someone has feelings for you?

My princess 🥺💗

22. Do you think someone is thinking about you right now?

Mmm... I don’t know?

23. Do you think you can last in a relationship for 6 months and not cheat?

Of course I can! I despise when people cheat on their significant others 🥺

24. Do you think you’ll be married in 5 years?

I’m not sure, that’s not a single person question for me because marriage isn’t something you use to lock someone in. Marriage is a partnership, you work together to lift each other up— as you should be doing before marriage even imo.

25. Do you want to be in a relationship this year?

I am in a relationship 😚💗

26. Has anyone told you they don’t want to ever lose you?

Yes.

27. Has someone ever written a song or poem for you?

Yes.

28. Have you ever been cheated on?

Yes.

29. Have you ever cheated on someone?

No.

30. Have you ever considered plastic surgery? If so, what would you change about your body?

No.

31. Have you ever cried over a guy/girl?

Yes.

32. Have you ever experienced unrequited love?

No, I’m very emotional but I used to always be hesitant with love.

33. Have you ever had sex with a man?

I choose not to answer

34. Have you ever had sex with a woman?

No.

35. Have you ever kissed someone older than you?

Yes.

36. Have you ever liked one of your best friends?

Yes.

37. Have you ever liked someone who your friends hated?

Yes.

38. Have you ever liked someone you didn’t expect to?

Not really.

39. Have you ever wanted someone you couldn’t have?

No, I used to be very reserved with falling in love.

40. Have you ever written a song or poem for someone?

Yes, I love music so I wrote a song but never gave it to her.

41. Have you had sex so far this year?

No.

42. How long can you just kiss until your hands start to wander?

I wouldn’t let them wander unless I had her consent, I value consent very strongly— even outside of anything sexual, I’ll ask if I can can someone before I do.

43. How long was your longest relationship?

Three years.

44. How many boyfriends/girlfriends have you had?

3

45. How many people did you kiss in 2012/2013?

No one.

46. How many times did you have sex last year?

0

47. How old are you?

19

48. If the person you like says they like someone else, what would you say?

I would encourage them to confess to them.

49. If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend, what is your favorite thing about him/her?

Her smile and laugh.

50. If your first true love knocked on your door with apology and presents, would you accept?

Depends on what they did.

51. Is there a boy/girl who you would do absolutely everything for?

Yes.

52. Is there anyone you’ve given up on? Why?

Yes, she tried to kill me.

53. Is there someone mad because you’re dating/talking to the person you are?

No?

54. Is there someone you will never forget?

Yes, my late best friend Lily.

55. Share a relationship story.

I dated a girl who told me I couldn’t hang out with my own older brother 🙃

56. State 8 facts about your body

I have freckles.

I’m pretty chubby.

Everyone thinks I’m sunburnt but I just have really red skin on my arms and face.

I sunburn way too easily though.

I have a lot of scars, both from doing things I love and mental illness.

I have brown eyes.

I have auburn hair

My hair reaches past my rear and it’s in between curly and wavy because I’m getting rid of the damage my mother did to it.

57. Things you want to say to an ex

I hope everyone realizes how horrible you treat people behind their backs.

58. What are five ways to win your heart?

Be understanding, don’t be afraid to commicate, be honest, be respectful, have an awareness of emotions.

59. What do you look like? (Post a picture!)

No thanks 👀 I want to keep my face off my blog 🥺

60. What is the biggest age difference between you and any of your partners?

I think I’m a year older, or a few months older.

61. What is the first thing you notice in someone?

Their attitude.

62. What is the sexiest thing someone could ever do for/to you?

Hug me from behind, play with my hair, or just have fun and deep conversations with me.

63. What is your definition of “having sex”?

I know that some others may not define sex the same way that I do, and that’s okay. I grew up learning and being told sex was something where you engaged in sexual activities with someone, so that’s always have I’ve defined it— a sexual activity.

64. What is your definition of cheating?

Well, I suppose I think of it like this. You and your partner probably agreed to be monogamous. You have that agreement and trust for the other to stay faithful. If your partner goes out and has a sexual or emotional affair with someone else then its cheating. The essence of cheating is breaking your partners trust.

65. What is your favourite foreplay routine?

I don’t know

66. What is your favourite roleplay?

I don’t know

67. What is your idea of the perfect date?

Something calm and relaxing for both people, maybe not somewhere very crowded.

68. What is your sexual orientation?

I’m a lesbian, I like girls 💗

69. What turns you off?

Inconsiderate taking, disrespectfulness, humiliation, degrading things, and anger.

70. What turns you on?

I choose not to air this to everyone— 👀

71. What was your kinkiest wet dream?

Im opting to not put this into the world—👀

72. What words do you like to hear during sex?

Okay, I’ll answer this. I have a thing for praise, I like to praise others and I like to be praised.

73. What’s something sweet you’d like someone to do for you?

Flowers, make something personal, or bake something with me 🥺💗

74. What’s the most superficial characteristic you look for?

I don’t really look for superficial things, I think. I really look at depth of knowledge, emotions, or their character

75. What’s the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for you?

It wasn’t romantic at all, but my late best friend Lily picked me up off my knees once in elementary after I was forced to kneel on rice for not being religious (at a private Christian school 😅)

76. What’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever done for someone?

I bought my late best friend Lily an outfit she loved but her mother wouldn’t let her get, and I embroidered the outfit like Lily had talked about wanting to do.

77. What’s your opinion on age differences in relationships?

I don’t mind it, other peoples ages in their relationships don’t effect me personally. As long as it’s not pedophilia, I’ll rock a pedophile into the asphalt any day.

78. What’s your dirtiest secret?

I was never able to tell anyone what happened to me, so he got away with what he did because I was too afraid to speak out.

79. When was the last time you felt jealous? Why?

I can’t remember the last time I felt jealousy tbh.

80. When was the last time you told someone you loved them?

I told Andy I loved her earlier 😚💗

81. Who are five people you find attractive?

Andy, the fam, and pretty much all my friends. Everyone is attractive, I don’t consider anyone ugly 🥺

82. Who is the last person you hugged?

I last hugged my brother

83. Who was your first kiss with?

A person who should not be named. They’re the Voldemort in my life 😒

84. Why did your last relationship fail?

They cheated on me and abused me in multiple ways.

85. Would you ever date someone off of the Internet?

That’s how Andy and I met, we met online 🥺💗

And I love her very much, she’s my gorgeous princess 👑

[talix18]

November 8

(There's a lot of padding in there.)

I have no free time today in front of a keyboard so I should be writing. Or working. Or listing all the things I forgot as I was half-heartedly packing. Or listing all the things I need to do before I leave so Mom isn’t disgusted when she comes to take care of the cats (Clean The Toilet). I managed to overpack without buying anything new but predictably, am not happy with any of it. This is one of my least favorite qualities about myself. Mom always hated shopping for jeans with me but I find my resistance to packing is incredibly annoying. I’m good at making sure the laundry is done so all of my options are open, but terrible at knowing what I will want to wear once I’m wherever.

I also managed to completely overlook shampoo and body wash on my first round of packing, which doesn’t bode well.

Is there some kind of rule against contractions I don’t know about? Word keeps putting blue squiggly lines under my contractions as if I don’t know what they are. I understand that writing all the words out will boost my count, but it’s not how people tend to talk.

Among the amenities at the retreat center where I’ll be this weekend is a working farm with baby animals. Yes, please, I would like to play with all of the baby animals. When life is complicated and ugly, baby animals are easy and adorable. My sister will be jealous when she sees the pictures with which I intend to spam her.

My sister is one of my best friends and I’m grateful for her every day. I’m not sure she would have chosen the way our lives have played out this far, but she is also unmarried and child-free (that part I’m pretty sure she’s okay with). If she dates, she doesn’t talk about it much with me, but I haven’t seen her in a relationship in over ten years. It was a brutal one. First love, first boyfriend, first break-up all in her mid-20s. Although my romantical adventures have been largely, um, unsuccessful, I am glad I got used to the idea of heartbreak young. (Even the song that turned me from a pop princess to a rock goddess was “Bringin’ On The Heartbreak” [MTV was born when I was in eighth grade and was my obsession for the next five years.])

Def Leppard is how I met my first boyfriend! We were in ninth grade, he was in my homeroom (both of our last names start with “H”), and he was wearing a tour shirt promoting the band’s second album. I was entranced. “You’ve seen them?” (Wanders off down a Randy Rhoads rabbit-hole.) I remember the conversation included something about Ozzy Osbourne and Randy Rhoads; either he’d seen them or was supposed to right after Randy died. Wikipedia tells me that Def Leppard opened for Ozzy at Merriweather, which is probably where A saw them; Randy Rhoads and all. (Now I am irrationally jealous at missing a show 38 years ago.) That’s probably where he got the shirt that made me talk to him; the shirt I made him leave with me when he moved away.

I should probably blame all my romantic misadventures on Def Leppard. They were a “heavy metal” (The lead singer joked “light alloy”) band that appealed to a slightly rougher crowd than I hand previously hung with. A introduced me to drinking beer in the woods by the elementary school (I was all of 13 or 14). The cops came and we ran to his apartment – his bedroom was on the ground floor and we climbed in through the window. We made out for a while to the Scorpions’ “Lovedrive”. A was a bad boy, and it took me a long time to get the taste for them out of my mouth.

A called every few months and my stomach would do flips at the sound of his voice. Did he ever actually say he was coming back for me or did I just make that part up?

My next boyfriend showed up when I was a senior and wreaked havoc on and off for the next seven years. He was a serial cheater and a pathological liar against which I had absolutely no defenses. I was a goody-goody. Teacher’s pet type. There was a pivotal moment one adolescent summer when the decision I made set the course for the rest of my life. I was hanging out in town with one of the tougher girls and her friends, trying to figure out how to smoke, and noticed it was 9:15. Curfew was 9:30, and I was easily a mile from home. I knew that showing up late would mean trouble. Was I going to say “fuck it” and keep hanging out?

I ran my ass off to make it home on time. Goody-goody. This probably kept me out of a lot of future trouble.

I fell hard for S – he was charming and charismatic and sang “Dixie Chicken” and made me laugh. He went to the Catholic boys’ school and was friends with my friend MB’s older brother. By that time I was solidly British pop new wave with some hard rock on the side (much like MTV itself). For the next absurd amount of years either he cheated on me or with me – he knew I would always be there. Until the night when he told me that he knew I was never going to find anyone who loved him like I did and he was ready to commit, but he had to tell me something first. His ex was pregnant and it was his. That was it for me. Finally. “Dixie Chicken” still gets me, as does the taste of Marlboro Reds and Bazooka bubble gum. (I started smoking when he broke up with me the first time.)

After my first college boyfriend (a good guy who is still married to the woman he dated after we broke up), I decided I wasn’t going to let anyone get close anymore. I was done with love; I was going to be one of those distant women who could never be possessed and never get hurt. I imagined veils and fog. If it was good enough for Stevie, it was good enough for me. At that time the idea of “if you want what someone has, do what they do” didn’t include the caveat of perhaps “asking if it was what they wanted and would they make the same choices again.” (I’m not saying Stevie’s not happy with her life, but 30 years ago she may have gently steered me another way.)

My old team leader just came by to chat and now my roll is slowed. She and I have worked together since I started here 17 years ago. My mind is starting to wander since I’m out of here soon.

I do want a partner – for practical reasons as well as romantic ones. I hate thinking that all the good sex is behind me, for one thing. It would be awesome to have help around the house – to have someone motivated to get something done when I just can’t get it in gear. (Much like this writing day. It was so easy yesterday!) (Five hundred more! Push through!)

I’m already annoyed because I’m not going to get my active minutes in today. It’s hard to be compulsive and unmotivated at the same time. I hate the feeling of being rushed – of not having enough time to get everything done. I want to get on the road before 4:30 because it’s Friday rush hour and I’m going around the beltway but I also want to clean the bathroom, scoop the litterboxes, and collect all of the paraphernalia I’ve forgotten to pack. It will be ridiculous if I have to level up a suitcase to go to a yoga retreat. Which is going to be interrupted by my service commitment, which is my decision, but ugh. I would prefer not to.

I’ve had an absurd amount of coffee today! The ideas should be flying out of me!

But where does a forty-ten-year-old meet people if not at work? There are people in all the meetings I go to but hardly any I’m interested in dating. My current working theory of relationships is that you should to the things that interest you. Whomever you meet along the way will have at least one interest in common. The problem with this theory is that carried to its logical conclusion, I’ve been in the wrong place for the past blah blah years. I must not be doing what I should be doing if I’m not meeting people I’m attracted to.

I mean, I know it’s all a crapshoot and our lives are run just as much by chance as by anything else. I can’t even complain about the cards I’ve been giving because I am way privileged. That’s something it took me way too long to figure out. I am a white woman who has always been housed and clothed and fed. I’m cis, I’m mostly heterosexual, and my body still does almost everything I ask of it. I have very little room to complain. I know that complaining about mental illness is something of a luxury – look at all the things going right that would otherwise take priority.

I have to thank the Internet for introducing me to people I would have never met otherwise. Yes, there are many cons to this big-data-driven lifestyle and I panic when my smart phone stops working. Social media absolutely has its negatives, but the people that I’ve met there are none of them. I met my first collection of Webpeeps thanks to FARK.com, but it was LiveJournal and Tumblr that expanded my world view.

(Does one last sentence complaining about being short on word count count as more words? I feel like it’s been all stops and starts today after the Randy Rhoads rabbit hole.)

(P.S. I’m ready to go - plus one big bag - at 3:50. I am the worst.)

[sophygurl]

Did my what’s coming up on TV quarterly-ish organizational project and re-did my shows I watch page. Figured it would be a good time to make an update post on my media consumption of late.

I’m still embroiled in the Big Brother season. It’s been a pretty terrible season truth be told, and I’d have noped out except for there being one houseguest left in there that I adore and want to support, and of course the fan community I have (a chat room I’ve been in for a decade now and also a twitter list of fans, update sites, and BB alum I enjoy interacting with). We’ve still got a ways to go, and I am not watching the live feeds much this season, but still watching the shows (mostly to chat with my friends about) and keeping up with the feeds via twitter to see what’s happening and watching the few small clips of that one hg i still enjoy. 

It’s an interesting thing when being part of a fandom starts to feel like a chore. Like, yes, you do this for entertainment purposes and could stop at any point when it stops being fun for you - but you do also create a community around you and half the fun is that community interaction and it’s harder to let go of that. Because you can’t generally pack that whole community up and take them to another show or experience with you. 

Another fan experience that was a let-down this summer was Veronica Mars. I won’t post any spoilers in case there is anyone out there yet who wants to watch S4 unspoiled and has yet to find out what happened, but suffice to say I am not pleased. 

I did enjoy most of the series right up until the ending. I know a lot of people are upset about other things that happened, but I can defend or at least explain most of that based on what the show and the characters have always been. But that ending. Wow. I am still recovering. And not at all interested in a season 5 or really anything else that Rob Thomas might want to work on in the future. He’s really ruined any fan goodwill he had in my eyes. 

Other TV shows I’ve been enjoying this summer: 

The 100 delivered another fascinating season. I know the show is problematic in a number of ways, but it still has such wonderful characters with incredible arcs of growth and struggle and learning to overcome together. The plots get wilder and wilder, but whatever, I’m along for the ride. 

Agents of Shield was ... interesting. I don’t even know what to say about it anymore, tbh.

American Princess on Lifetime was a surprisingly fun new show - a NY socialite runs off on her wedding day and ends up at a Ren Faire, where she meets new friends and decides to stay and create a new life for herself. It’s charming, sweet, romantic, funny, and fun for any found family fans. 

BH90210′s pilot episode cracked me tf up. I kind of can’t believe the cast is going along with this satirical version of playing themselves trying to get a reboot of the original show going. It’s soapy and campy and so delightfully weird, while also being nostalgic. Can’t wait to see what they do with it. (Also I miss Luke Perry enormously)

Elementary has one episode left and I will be very sad when the story is complete, but happy for everyone involved for having been part of such a unique spin on Sherlock Holmes in such a successful way.

Euphoria season one was an intense emotional process, watching teens and their families struggle with addiction, violence, abusive relationships, sexual discoveries, gender navigation, mental illness, and so much more. Also just a visually stunning show. 

Grand Hotel is a fun soapy new show that I am enjoying very much. Classic soap tropes, a largely Latinx cast, a lesbian main character, and lots of eye candy.

Jane the Virgin put out a wonderful final season and series finale. I laughed. I cried. I was very satisfied. 

Killjoys has started up it’s final season. I’m loving it, but I also wanna cling to it and scream “no! don’t go!” 

Pandora is a new show on the CW, which is interesting. Futuristic space academy featuring a clone, a mind reader, an augmented human, an alien from a planet we were recently at war with, and Pandora herself who has some kinda mystery surrounding her and the recent death of her parents. Lots of political intrigue and conspiracy, with episodic plots that the young adults uncover together each week, and just about every sci-fi trope you could think of being covered. 

Trinkets on Netflix was a cute lil show about teenage girls in a shoplifting support group. It was a really genuine look at the highs and lows of female friendship at that age. 

In other TV watching news, I finally got all of the Northern Exposure DVDs and am doing a long-awaited re-watch of my all-time favorite show. I’m on the second season. 

In addition to completing that DVD collection, I also completed collecting all of the Realm of the Eldering books (yay birthday money!) and am doing my re-read of those. It’s going to take me a long time, because my re-reading gets done while attempting to fall asleep and also when I wake up trying to get back to sleep, so depending on how the insomnia is going, it could be anywhere from a couple of paragraphs to maybe 50 pages tops per night and RotE is a looooot of books. I’m still on the first novel now. 

That also means, I am taking a little break from my otherwise-continual Raven Cycle re-reading lol. 

Other stuff I’ve been reading - started the Wayward Children series by Seanan McGuire, finished Tamora Pierce’s Emelan series (although I think she’s writing one more of those yet), and got caught up on Patricia Brigg’s Mercyverse series. Then, since I’m caught up on all the series I’m reading (other than Wayward Children since I just started it), I went and put a crapton of new books on my library hold list - some of which are the first books in series themselves. So here we go! 

And of course, I’ve been playing lots of Sims. Love love loving the Island Living expansion pack. The mermaids are so much fun, as is swimming and boating in the ocean, other beach activities, and just living in a more communal setting (people show up to help put out fires, bring food over randomly, fix things that are broken, etc.). I definitely won’t tire of the stuff in this pack before the next new pack comes out, which I imagine will be sometime late this fall or early winter, if they go according to the usual schedule. 

Guess that’s all for now. Might do some more specific VMars meta at some point, once I get my thoughts and feelings more collected. IDK. This post is so all over the place I’m not sure if I’m gonna tag it with any specific fandom or media. 

[edourado]

Tag time!

Thanks my darling @carry-the-sky 💗💗💗

1. how tall are you?

Look, I’m not sure. Every time I go to the doctors, they tell me, but I forget. Something around 1,64m. I don’t know what that is in American;

2. what color and style is your hair?

My hair is a brown/black lump of son of a bitch. I wear it a little above my shoulders, and it does not know what is wants. It’s straight but also wavy, it’s as fine as a newborn’s and it hates me;

3. what color are your eyes?

Super duper brown. I’d say black, but it’s like the darkest chocolate you can find, the kind that only grown up grown ups like;

4. do you wear glasses?

I do, mostly to watch tv and go outside. Like, I CAN drive without them, but it would be ill advised;

5. do you wear braces?

I do, my friends, yes, because when I wore them the first time, I was an overly anxious bench, took them off before I should, didn’t wear the retainer, and also my orthodontist was a bit of a lazy bum that just cared about the check every month. So, here I am, adult bracing. Yaaaay;

6. what is your fashion style?

Oh, well, shit. Ideally, comfortable fashion. Realistically, an uncoordinated mess;

7. full name?

Princess Consuela Banana Hamock

(What kind of question is this, quiz? It is the internets);

8. when were you born?

I’m a 90’s baby, and that’s all you need to know, QUIZ;

9. where are you from and where do you live now?

I’m from Brazil, I grew up in Brazil, but I now currently live in Brazil;

10. what school do you go to?

I have 911 in speed dial, just FYI;

11. what kind of student are you?

Very competent, had an easy time learning, but OH SO LAZY. My grades were never PERFECT, but I can only blame that on myself. Whenever I tried A LITTLE BIT, I aced everything. Lucky for me, the things they teach in schools are 50% of them useless, so I don’t feel really guilty or incompetent. But that’s now, when I was a kid I measured my self worth 100% based on my grades, so I always thought I was a mediocre human at best;

12. do you like school?

I like learning, but no, I don’t really like school. I never did get used to the traditional learning and teaching methodology. And I do teach, and ignore most of the schools ~training, because my commitment is to my students, and the school’s is to their pocket;

13. what are your favorite school subjects?

If it’s not math, physics or chemistry, I’m into it. I would LOVE to have been a scientist (y’all are real life super heroes. I worship and envy your brains), but this chick likes history and languages and literature. Basically if it doesn’t pay well, I wanna do it;

14. favorite TV shows?

I have established that I don’t like picking favorites, but currently, Sense8 (forever), The Punisher (in spite of that ending), Daredevil (who had the grace to end well), Good Girls, Grace and Frankie, the Korean dramas my sister brought into my life and I will thank her forever;

15. favorite movies?

Pride and Prejudice 2005 (duh), About Time (don’t touch me ok?), 5 to 7 (My core has been compromised by this movie), Before We Go, One Fine Day. Do you see a pattern?;

16. favorite books?

I don’t have one that I keep coming back to other than the Harry Potter saga, but I wouldn’t say they are my favorites. The one that stunned me the most was Gone Girl. For a number of reasons, the bigger of them being that it made me realize that nothing is black and white, and human relationships (be them romantic, parental, brotherly and sisterly, professional, friendships) are complex and people are complicated. Good people can do really bad shit, and bad people can and do experience valid emotions. This book fucked me up, basically;

17. favorite pastime?

Writing and reading and Netflixing. Also, who am I kidding, I like to go shopping;

18. do you have any regrets?

Answering “no” to this one means you don’t reflect on your actions and take no account of the impact of them on the people around you. Of course I do, we all SHOULD have regrets, since no one is born perfect and we learn a bunch of fucked to shit from an early age. We HAVE to try and grow up and evolve, so if you don’t regret anything, you’re doing something wrong. Sorry for getting intense. This is a sensitive topic with me (and I promise this is no shade to anyone, since I have only read @carry-the-sky ‘s, and her answer was the correct one);

19. dream job?

If you pay me to travel and write and absorb art and food and culture, I would never ever quit;

20. would you like to get married someday?

If I ever find my way to Chris Evans or Michael B Jordan, yes, sure;

21. would you like to have kids someday?

Look. I like them kids. I do. But I never had any desire to have them, myself. Gimme a baby to play with and hold, I’ll happily do it. But I’m 29 and the urge to birth my own is either late to the party or not coming at all;

23. do you like shopping?

Yes. A little too much. I’m trying to dial it way down, for the sake of my mental, emotional and financial health, but I do love it;

24. what countries have you visited?

USA, France, England, Mexico. The list is WAY shorter than I’d like, I’m working on expanding it;

25. what’s the scariest nightmare you’ve ever had?

Is this therapy? Are you tricking me into therapy? I don’t know, dude, I think I had one where my sister died horribly? Probably this one;

26. do you have any enemies?

This IS therapy. In the grand scale of life? Yes, the current president of my country is my mortal enemy, and the likes of the American Clown ya’ll didn’t elect but sits at the White House are my sworn foes. But, personally, no, I’m not interesting enough to have enemies;

27. do you have an s/o?

Potatoes;

28. do you believe in miracles?

Potatoes exist, so yes.

Joining Carrie’s chorus and tagging @ejunkiet, @devilbunnyking, @lightofpage, and adding @westonfollower, @murdocksassassin, @ambrosiaswhispers, @tacohead13, @kteague, @lpdwillwrite4coffee, @goddamnitkastle, and also the everyone that follows me. I’m tagging you.

❤️

[feedmeramyun]

Fifty Questions Tag Game!

I was tagged by @sweet-teeth-mfs

Hi, it me, Bee. 

1. What takes up too much of your time?

Realistically, work? I work an office job to pay my while I finish my PhD:  it’s a good job and luckily I don’t hate it (not to mention I wouldn’t even be able to do my PhD without it) but it’d be great to have that time to work on my academic projects.

2. What makes your day better?

Food.

3. What’s the best thing to happen to you today?

I didn’t do a lot today, but it was announced Lee Min Ho has been discharged from the military so that made me happy! 

4. What fictional place would you like to go to?

So. Many. Places. But forced to choose right now? Rabanastre from Final Fantasy XII.

5. Are you good at giving advice?

Lots of people ask me for it, but I think that’s because I have a very logical and rational understanding of the world. I’m not great at understanding feelings (or remembering they exist...).

6. Do you have any mental illness?

I do! My family is particularly blessed with mental health issues and I inherited my fair share of them. I’ve learned to accept them as part of me though, and I’m mostly at peace with that now: but always happy to talk honestly and frankly with others about them.  

7. Have you ever experienced sleep paralysis?

Yes, ain’t that a blast. 

8. What musician inspired you the most?

As a teen, Kurt Cobain (so predictable!) was extremely important to me. I’m also a huge fan of Shakira: her work ethic and creativity has been a massive inspiration for me. Kpop wise, I’m in awe of female idols breaking down boundaries and forging their identities (in particular Sunmi, Hyuna and Hwasa), and of course Taemin in his explorations of gender, identity and style. 

9. Have you ever fallen in love?

Mmm, in my way. My spectrum of emotion is quite different from most peoples, so for a while I wondered if maybe I couldn’t love. Now I’m older and have a better perspective of myself I realise I can and do love, its just different. 

10. What’s your dream date?

This gets asked all the time, and I generally don’t know? Probably something low key that mostly revolved around food.

11. What do others notice about you?

I asked Edie and she said my eyes.  I quote: ‘You have very bright, round eyes. Very expressive.’ 

(What she actually said was my cuteness but I’m a grown woman dammit.)

12. What is an annoying habit you have?

I didn’t ask Edie this but I’m PRETTY sure she would agree it’s my inability to let something drop if it’s wrong or illogical, even if I know it’s supposed to be a joke. I just can’t help it. 

13. Do you still talk to your first love?

No.

14. How many exes do you have?

SOME. 

15. How many songs are in your playlist?

Spotify helpfully won’t tell me how many songs, but apparently its 12hrs 42 mins. 

16. What instruments can you play?

Guitar. I was in a band as a teenager, but I haven’t played in years. 

17. What do you have the most pictures of?

It’s a close tie between food and Do Kyungsoo. 

18. Where would you like to go before you die?

I’m lucky to have ticked a few places off my list (South Africa, Central Mexico, Moscow) but I’d really like to do a food tour of China, Japan and Korea soon. I’d also love to see St Petersburg, Machu Pichu and Teotihuacan.

19. What is your zodiac?

Libra.

20. Do you relate to it?

I know literally nothing about astrology. 

21. What is happiness to you?

Being content, being able to enjoy the people and things I love. 

22. Are you going through anything right now?

Some stuff, a few things. 

23. What’s the worst decision you ever made?

Oh boy I make terrible decisions on a daily basis.   

24. What’s your favorite store?

Sostrene Grene.

25. What’s your opinion on abortion?

It’s a human right. 

26. Do you keep a bucket list?

No. I have goals and things I value, but it’s not really my style.

27. Do you have a favorite album?

Singular? No. Favourites however would be:

Donde Estan Las Ladrones Shakira

Nevermind Nirvana

The Devil and God Are Raging Inside of Me Brand New

Warning Sunmi

Love Shot Exo

Want Taemin

28. What do you want for your birthday?

The manga boxset of Nausicaa

29. What are most people’s first impression of you?

As previously mentioned, Edie would say that I’m cute. 

In honesty, I’m not sure. I think it depends on the setting: I seem to either come across sweet or intimidating, with no real in between. But I wouldn’t say I’m especially either. 

30. What age do you seem according to most people?

Probably early twenties. 

31. Where do you keep your phone while you’re sleeping?

On my bedside table. 

32. What word do you say the most?

Probably fuck? I have a bad habit of starting sentences with I either ‘Well...’ ‘I mean...’ and ‘I feel like...’ 

33. What’s the oldest age you would date?

Mid 30′s maybe? I like to be mostly on the same page as someone. 

34. What’s the youngest age you would date?

As with above, so probably 25?

35. What job/career do most people say would suit you?

Teacher. 

36. What’s your favorite music genre?

I tend to cycle through genres depending on my mood, but I unashamedly love some good Pop. 

37. If you could live in any country in the world, where would it be?

I like the UK, even if we’re in a state of complete political turmoil right now. I’d probably leave England for Wales or Scotland if it weren’t so far from family. I toyed with moving to Spain for a while, too.

38. What is your current favorite song?

Prism by SHINee! (I’ve been having mad feels since Minho left)

39. How long have you had this blog for?

Uhhhh since Edie made me? 

40. What are you excited for?

The farmers market on Saturday (with my friend and her adorable kids).

41. Are you a better talker or listener?

Talker. 

42. What is the last productive thing you did?

I made the posters, promotional materials and edited the photos for our conference next month. 

43. What do you want for Christmas?

I realllllly want to go the new Star Wars experience at Disney. 

44. What class do you did you get the best grades in?

History, English and Media Studies. 

45. On a scale of 1-10, how are you feeling right now?

A 5? I got my period and there was a huge thunderstorm earlier, though. 

46. What can you see yourself doing in ten years?

Hopefully in a full time lecturing position at a University. 

47. When did you get your first heartbreak?

I’m not sure, it depends what you would class as heartbreak: I remember crying my eyes out when the Sailor Scouts sacrificed themselves for Sailor Moon in the Dark Kingdom. 

48. What age do you want to get married?

Whenever, really. 

49. What career did you want to have as a child?

Power Ranger, Jedi, Princess of Power, Digidestined. And then a journalist or writer. (Which, I kind of am?!)

50. What do you crave right now?

Diet coke

I tag @ouuchyie, and any one else who wants to do it! I never really have any one to tag in these, since Edie tags me. Come say hey. I’m nice, mostly. 

[bigseuegsobtob]

3, 9, 24, 42, 50

Thank youuuuuuuuu luv (*＾ワ＾*) teeeeeeheeeee!!!!

3: How old are you and how old do you get mistaken for?HAHAHAHAH (Once, I asked my followers to discuss / debate about the average age in the kpop / starlights fandom and I got a lot of responses ~) it was hilarious! But to answer your question, most people believe that I’m younger by virtue of the way I “sound” aka meaning I sound like I’m a teenager (or a child) LOL As for looks wise, I think people usually think I’m in my twenties, not a big difference to my actual age really.I’m a 90 liner, same as NEO

9: What are you really bad at?Probably making decisions. I’m really indecisive. It’s better to just NOT give me an option than me having to decide on my own hahaha 

24: Opinion on relationship age differencesAll is fine and dandy as long as both are above the age of 21 and it’s consensual. The reason why I say 21 is cause I think 16 - 19 is still a bit too young as they’re still relatively impressionable. Though of course there are exceptions to the rule. Like if, say, 30 year old mentally ill / challenged person is in an abusive relationship with his / her 50 year old partner, well, it’s not right but it’s due to other reasons unrelated to age. 

42: Favorite type of movieFor movies, I would prefer fantasy-like type of genres. Princesses, Magic, Enchantment, Fairies, Kingdoms, Realms…themes like that.｡.:*☆

50: What’s your “type”?Hmm, I usually fall for the quiet & charming types. I like the low-key charming, sort of nerdy and homely type of guys. They’re mostly the unassuming sort and while they’re pretty well known for their intellect, they’re not necessarily the all popular jocks / athlete. They’re the type to actually like visiting museums / libraries and exhibitions and won’t mind a simple stroll along the river XD (clearly, I gave this a lot of thought lmao)^^

unusual asks (☆^ー^☆)

[aros001]

Read through light novel vol. 12. Random thoughts.

A while back there was a cartoon called Superman The Animated Series and there were a lot of fans who thought their version of Lex Luthor was black because his skin was darker than what most other incarnations had been. Later on in the series, there was an episode with a one-off character whom had the exact same character model as Lex except he actually was black. The common fan theory for that episode was that the showrunners did that so people could see through a direct comparison what Lex would look like if he was black and they'd stop getting asked about it.

I bring this up because Alta reminds me a little bit of that, like she was created by the author in response to misconceptions too many people have about Raphtalia. That she worships Naofumi, that she loves him to the point of obsession after he saved her life and cured her illness, that she agrees with everything he says and would let him do anything to her if he wanted, etc. None of this is a criticism of Alta, since she's still a fun character (if a bit of a creepy stalker sometimes), but there are times when I'm reading where she feels like she's the author's way of showing what Raphtalia would be like if she actually was any of those things.

Overlord was my gateway series into both Isekai anime and light novel books, so naturally I tend to compare things a lot to Overlord. Alta reminds me a LOT of Ainz's minions in regards to her relationship with Naofumi. "You're great! You're amazing! You're perfect! Anyone who even minorly inconveniences you must DIE." That girl is thirsty in every sense of the word. Obviously I'm hoping her infatuation isn't due to the elixir. It's still creepy to have a child fawning that much over a grown adult (though not as much as it'd be the other way around) but it'd be far worse if that's the result of brain altering chemicals or the like over her own natural feelings. Like I said with Motoyasu's Temptation ability, stuff like that always makes me feel really uncomfortable.

Wyndia?! Dragons?! F**k yeah, I love Breath of fire!

The Demon Dragon Emperor was a great boss monster. It kind of took the best parts of the previous big boss battles and rolled them into one. He was an overwhelmingly powerful force like the Spirit Tortoise but still had an actual personality like Glass, not being just another monster like the Soul Eater. Using the Shield of Wrath to power up and wanting to absorb Naofumi because of his anger even gave an interesting dynamic, like with L'Arc and Therese being Naofumi's allies for a time and fighting to save their world. There was even the outright ego and lust for power that Kyo had but the Demon Dragon never threw a tantrum when things didn't go his way. He either got angry and fought harder or tried to run when he was in over his head. It never seemed like he was so weak mentality that he had to actively protect his ego. He was as good and powerful as he claimed and let his actions speak for themselves. When that didn't work he didn't start whining, just promised that he would return. I love forward to him being Naofumi's Nine Tailed Fox.

“It seems like you’re just going out in search of unjustified resentment based on misunderstandings, and then using that to condemn me as evil. Instead of wasting your time doing that, why don’t you just fix all of those problems yourself? You’re a hero too, right?”

“No, Princess Malty told me that these were special powers that only your shield possesses!”

What the f**k is with this bitch?!

Also, got to love how the three guys who prided themselves on "clearly" knowing everything about this world because they've played games similar to it believe every single thing they're told about Naofumi's shield, even if they've never heard about shielders having such abilities. Especially hearing such info from a person who has no reason to know anything about what the Legendary Shield can do. Malty is the ex-princess of a country that worships every hero EXCEPT for the shield. First the ability to brainwash, then that he was controlling the Spirit Tortoise, and now the ability to bring the dead back to life.

[Five seconds later]

A BRAINWASHING BOW?! ARE YOU F**KING KIDDING ME?!

Between that and Motoyasu's Temptation ability, now I'm going to be paranoid that Naofumi does actually has some kind of mind altering power he can unlock (closest right now is just Hate Reaction, which just makes monsters focus on him during battle). Malty is going to have a field day with that if it ever happens.

I'm kind of split on how I feel about the situation with Itsuki. Obviously I'm glad he apologized to Rishia and is on Naofumi's side, as well as his actions being the result of his background and issues as opposed to him just being a jerk. But it's kind of like with Trash, where the sympathetic backstory doesn't feel like it excuses or makes up for what he's been doing. All the heroes, including Naofumi, have serious flaws and reasons for those flaws, but Itsuki throughout has kind of felt like the most hypocritical and sometimes nefarious of the four. Treating Rishia so badly and then getting rid of her, not just because she upstaged him during a wave, but because she reminded him of when he was bullied back in his old life make him feel like an even worse person. Maybe I have a bias because I am a huge fan of superheroes, which was a comparison drawn a few times in this book, and there are certainly fans, including myself probably, who would probably act just like Itsuki has been for the same reasons, but it still doesn't endear me much to his character. Instead of using his backstory as a reason to be better, he chose to be just as bad as what he's dealt with, justifying it only with his own desire to want to be the hero; to want to be the main character. He's a little like Light from Death Note in a way. "I am justice and those who disagree with me are against justice.", while any fan of modern superheroes could tell you it's not that simple (like Rishia did). Obviously, I'm probably being way too harsh. I feel like I'd maybe be less split and more forgiving if we'd gotten to see Itsuki interact with his former party after they abandoned him to the Spirit Tortoise, not just Rishia, like we did with Motoyasu. See more how he treated the people who didn't remind him of himself and how it felt when they stopped feeding his ego and hero complex.

I'm really enjoying the different drawbacks each of the different curse series have. It'd be really easy to have just a loss in stats or a risk of death like Naofumi's Shield of Wrath but I like that each has its own unique consequence that relates to the power that was being used. Ren used the sin of greed to gain temporary power and now the quality of whatever he touches lowers, as well as his own exp. It's like a reverse Midas touch. Then we have Itsuki, whom after spending so long demanding everyone conform to his ideal, now becoming completely passive and obedient. Of course, now I'm concerned about what the drawback to Motoyasu's curse is, since it seems to be based in lust.

Am I the only one who thinks the ninjas attacked not because of the Miko outfit but because they were bored? They've been watching Raphtalia's family since before she was born and have done nothing other than that. Now they're attacking over the smallest excuse, because they should know the context of why she was wearing that outfit since they've been constantly watching; not as a sign she wants the throne but because, well, that sh*t gets Naofumi going. I think they were just bored and jumped at the chance to finally fight something.

But back to seriousness, Naofumi's reaction at the end was my absolute favorite of his yet. Just that realization that these people watched Raphtalia's village get attacked several times, watched her family die, watched her get sold into slavery, and did NOTHING to stop any of it, only to finally reveal themselves now trying to kill her over a misunderstanding. I'm completely on his side. F**k these people! I'm glad they're going to go take over their country and crush it! (I'm vindictive today, jeez...). I took a peek at the art for vol. 13 and it has Naofumi sitting on a throne like freaking Lelouch from Code Geass and I'm just sitting here going "Ohboyohboyohboyohboyohboy!" I love a bad guy I can root for.

I'm just imagining that Lilo and Stitch meme, where Raphtalia is at her bedside praying to Heaven to send her a friend; the nicest angel they have.

Cut to Naofumi, laughing maniacally and surrounded by fire.

If Naofumi and Raphtalia ever have a daughter, he is going to forbid that child from leveling up until she's 18 if there is ANY chance she'll grow like a typical Demi-Human. Naofumi will want her to stay as cute, little, and innocent for as long as possible after all the other things like Filo he's helped raise. 50/50 he'll do the same if they have a son.

Original Reddit post: https://www.reddit.com/r/shieldbro/comments/fi2imi/read_through_light_novel_vol_12_random_thoughts/

[lil-brioche]

All the numbers on the ask game!!!!!!!!

OMG OK 1- What is your name?Kiara 2- Your nicknames?I think Kiih and Kiarinha ( I can not remember :c )3- Favorite petnames?Baby girl, Pudding, Angel, sweethear, princess, Honey, Cutie, Love and Darling4- What is your age?165- What is your regressed age range?5-86- What do you like to do while teenietime?I like to color, draw, play video games, watch a lot of cartoons, play with my caregiver, listen to stories, read, listen to music and play with my dog 7- Do you have a caregiver or a big sib?I have a caregiver!!! @ednaldo-pereira 8- If you have one (caregiver/big sib) how do you call them?Daddy, Dada and Love9- Frilly socks or knee socks?Knee Socks10- What is your favorite cartoon/anime while teenietime?Star vs the forces of evil 11- Sippy cups or bottles?Sippy Cups12- What is the name of your favorite plushie?Agent Panda, Jeremias and Barry 13- Are you a quiet baby or a loud baby?Loud Baby14- Chocolate or strawberry milk?Strawberry Milk15- Do you wear diapers?No16- Are you afraid of dark?A little bit17- Disney or studio ghibli?Both, but if I have to choose… I think Disney…?18- Halloween or christimas?Halloween19- Do you pet regress?Sometimes20- If you pet regress, as what animal do you regress?Kittens21- Which carebear is your favorite?Grumpy Bear22- What is your favorite princess?Mulan23- Are you a princet or a knight?Knights are awesome24- Do you have a bedtime?Yes, but i don’t like it  >:c25- Does your caregiver give you rules?Yes26- If you have rules, what are your rules?I have to be very respectful with Daddy all the times, repect other people and sleep on the corect time. I also have to do my homework, eat everything Daddy asks me to and never say bad things about myself. I think that’s it27- Do you like to use pacifiers?Yeeeeees28- Do people irl know you age regress?Yes29- Do you like superheroes? What is your favorite one?I LOVE SUPERHEROES!!! My favorite is Batman, but i like Spider man as well30- What is your favorite color?Blue blue blue31- Do you have a crib? Would you like to have one?No, i don’t have… And i don’t want to have one32- What is your favorite juice flavor?Strawberry!! But I like apple too 33- Do you eat a lot of candies?No, I prefer salty foods 34- Do you age regress in public?Yes35- Do you prefer to color or draw?Color36- Crayons or markers?Crayons37- How long do you age regress?About 2+ years38- Do you tell your secrets to your plushies?Yeeees39- How many plushies do you have?A lot, like a looooot40- What are your favorites teenietot/age regression blog?@pinkspoiled, @babysippycup, @strawberryandsugarybaby41- What’s your favorite season?Fall42- Are you also a caregiver?No, sad sad sad :c43- Post a picture of all your pacifiersOne day :^)44- How many sippy cups/bottles do you have?3 or 4, something like that45- What’s your favorite dinosaur?Dinossaurão ( It’s a biiig dinosaur that makes RAAAAWR, like a T-Rex ) 46- What is your favorite teeniesnack?Dino Nuggets47- What’s your favorite dessert?Strawberry cake48- Do you like stickers?I luuuuv stickers49- One thing you love about yourselfMy eyes…?50- Random fact about youLittle Brioche has a lot of photos of herself eating different types of foods51- What’s your favorite animal?Dinosaurs and dogs52- What’s your gender?Female53- How did you realize you age regress?I think it was like… “I like a lot of kids stuff, I feel like a child… I act just like a child… Um… I think I’m regressing …” (  I do not remember how it was ) 54- Why do you age regress?To deal with my anxiety, my depression and my daily problems … And because it makes me happy! 55- Do you like bedtime stories?I luv luv luv luv Bedtime Stories56- Are you sensitive when teenie?Yeeeeeees57- Do you prefer to spoil yourself or when someone spoil you?I like to be spoiled by someone else58- How often do you get into teenietime?Once or twice a day, especially at night 59- What do you do that always cheer you up?A lot of kisses kisses and hugs hugs60- What do you usually do in teenietime?I usually listen to stories, draw, and watch a lot of movies 61- Do you have any hobbies?I like to sing, draw, color and play drama62- Does your guardian know you age regress?I think so63- In what other age regression communities (but teenietots) are you in?Carekids64- What do you usually wear?Blouses, dresses, skirts, overalls, pajamas 65- Do you prefer being big or being teenie?Teenie66- Are you a big sib to other teenietots?No no no, sad sad sad :c67- When is your birthday?21/0368- Do you prefer having a caregiver or age regressing alone?I’d rather have a caregiver 69- Do you like playdates? Have you ever been in one?I loooooooove playdates, I have been in one with @pinkspoiled ( my precious babyyyy )70- What do you think you can do to change the world?I can be a good person with everyone I can be! 71- Do you like to cuddle?I love love love~~72- Are you more dependent while teenietime or can you do things by yourself?I’m very dependent :c73- Plushies or dolls?Plushies74- Tiara or pet ears?Tiara75- Bubble bath or bath bomb?Bubble bath!!!76- What is your favorite toy?My plushies77- Do you prefer using a pacifier or sucking your thumb?Paciiiiis78- What’s your favorite candy?Lollipops79- Do you have an adult pacifier?No :c80- Are there monsters under your bed?No, but there are monsters in my closet :c81- What do you usually do to make your caregiver/big sib happy?I sing, drawn and give a lot of kisses and huggies on Daddy82- How would your perfect teenietime be like?My perfect Teenietime would be to play with Daddy, draw a lot, watch a lot of movies with Daddy under the blanket, eat Dino Nuggets, listen to stories and sleepy with Daddy83- Do you have a nursery? Would you like to have one?No, I don’t have, but I would like to have one84- Aquarium or zoo?Aquarium85- Do you stim?Yes86- Do you have a comfort item?Yes87- What color is your hair?It’s a mix of green, blue, pink, purple and other faded colors88- What are your dreams?Be happy forever with Daddy89- Are you a more like a big baby or like a small baby?A big baby90- What’s the color of your toothbrush?Blue91- Do you have any mental illness?I do not know if depression and anxiety qualify like this, but if so, then yes( I do not know much about this, I’m a failure :c )92- If you have rules, what’s your favorite?My favorite rule is the one that says that I Can not say bad things about myself93- Do you like tea parties with your stuffies?Of course94- Do you crawl while teenietime?I only crawl when I am playing on the ground95- Do you like band-aids? What are your favorite themes?I love band-aids!!  My favorites are my Star Wars band-aids 96- Do you watch big kid shows? (ex: icarly, adventure time…)A loooot, and I love!!97- Cake or cookie?Hum… Cake?98- How many coloring books do you have?Many99- Do you play dress up?Yesss100- What music do you usually listen while teenietime?I listen to soundtracks of anime and games101- Are you a mermaid or a fairy?A mermaid fairy102- Chocolate or vanilla?Chocolate103- Are you a lazy or an energetic baby?A lazy lazy baby :c104- Are you a non-verbal age regressor?No, I speak a lot… Like…. A LOT 105- If you could have one superpower, what would it be?I wanted to have the power of the hug! ( Like, I wish I could hug all the people who felt sad and make them happy )106- Do you have any kintypes?I don’t think so107- What’s your favorite video game?Undertale and Ib108- Milk or juice?Juice109- Do you prefer playing in the sun or in the snow?Snowww110- Talk about your favorite plushie!Agent Panda is a secret agent, who fight against the crime and protect the world!Jeremias is a party entertainer! He lives in Bangu ( A Rio de Janeiro’s Neightbourhood ) and make all the children happy!!!Barry is a baker, the best baker ever! He is Worldwide known because of his delicious brioches!111- Do you have friends that also age regress?Yeeeeeeeees!! @pinkspoiled and @strawberryandsugarybaby112- Ponytail or pigtail?Pigtail!!!113- Is your room messy or tidy?really really messy, sad sad114- Do you like playmats? Do you have one?I like playmats a lot, but i don’t have one :c115- Do you cry easily or do you never cry?I’m a cry baby :c( Sorry for taking so long, I needed Daddy’s help to answer all of them :c )

[jayykesley]

can I ask for all of the oc questions for both of my sons

absolutely you can;

1. what do they look like?

Derick’s about 5’9, with slightlytanned skin, golden blond curly hair, and blue eyes

Roswell is a tall, lanky, 17-yearold with ridiculous dark hair and big round grey eyes

2. describe their personality inthree words:

Derick: Nervous, shameful, and sweet

Roswell: Excited, enthusiastic,empathetic

3. how tall are they?

Derick’s 5’9, and Roswell’s about 5’11

4. favorite foods?

Derick loves anything sweet – cookies,brownies, cake, coffee with more sugar than actual coffee

Roswell will eat anything andeverything, he’s a growing kid

5. any allergies?

Not that I know of

6. what is their build?

When the gang first meets Derick,he’s real real skinny because he can’t afford to eat a lot. After they get himsome real food, he still somewhat skinny, but a little more filled out?

Roswell’s just lanky like a noodle

7. do they have curly, wavy, orstraight hair?

Derick’s got super curly hair thatsticks up everywhere and gets in his eyes

Roswell has straight hair that lookslike he stuck a fork in a socket

8. do they like books? if so, howoften do they read?

Derick doesn’t read a lot – not alot of good reading material in Cirsca, it’s mostly just manuals and journals.Roswell’s kind of the same way, he doesn’t mind them but reading’s not his ideaof fun.

9. what are their talents?

Derick’s not half bad at drawing,though he usually only draws Ragsy.

Roswell: Talking absolutely non-stop

10. two or more other fictionalcharacters they’re similar to?

Shoshanna from Inglorious Basterdswas the inspiration for Derick, though I guess the two aren’t wildly similar interms of personality. Maybe Cress from Lunar Chronicles? Or Noah from RavenCycle? I’m actually not sure…

For Roswell, definitely Dick Graysonfrom the Lego Batman Movie

11. what is one strange hobby/talentthey have?

Derick’s freaky good atcommunicating with animals. Like, “Disney Princess” good.

I actually don’t know one forRoswell…and here I thought I knew my ocs….

12. five songs that fit them:

For Derick, here’s three:

“The Letter That Never Came” –Thomas Newman (yeah its instrumental, but its just so sad at the beginning thatI think of Derick every time)

“Beauty and the Beast” – BATB OTS(the original with angela Lansbury – technically derick/Rosalyn but still)

“I Went TooFar” – Aurora          

I swear I have more, I just can’tthink of them atm

And Shut Up and Dance definitelyreminds me of Roswell

13. who do you think could play themin a live-action rendition?

Evan Peters, who is also myface-claim for Derick.

A young Nicholas Hoult is my faceclaim for Roswell too..

14. do they just want to rest?

YES oh my gosh yes that’s all Derickwants. Roswell’s the opposite; there’s too much to do!!

15. which OC did not sign up forthis?

Derick, for sure

16. who’s their favorite person?

It takes him a while to warm up toher, but overall I think Rosalyn is his favorite person. He also really enjoyshanging out with Carson and Lorelei, because they’re like the siblings he neverhad.

Funny enough, Rosalyn is alsoRoswell’s favorite person, right next to Dr. Anaya Gatling! Gatling’s like amentor to him, so he loves her so much too.

17. who do you ship them with?

ROSALYN with Derick, and Roswell’sperfectly fine on his own

18. have they experienced the deathof a loved one?

Derick hasn’t, Roswell has (he and Rosalynused to have an older brother)

19. have they ever been tortured?

For Derick, doesmental/emotional/physical abuse count? For Roswell, no, not yet (?)

20. what’s the worst thing you’vedone to them without spoiling anything?

Gave Derick to parents who mentallyand emotionally abused him then abandoned him, so now he genuinely doesn’trecognize real love when he’s shown it.

For Roswell, killing his big brotherreally sucks so…

21. any mental illnesses?

Derick probably does, but he hasn’tbeen diagnosed. Roswell’s mental health is great, so no.

22. what’s their favorite animal?

Derick’s is cats, Roswell’s is dogs.

23. what are their flaws?

Derick’s kind of a coward, veryabsorbed in his own mind, overthinks everything.

Roswell can be too trusting and tooeager to see the best in everyone. Also could accidentally share secret infowhile rambling.

24. what’s their favorite color?

Derick likes green, and Roswelllikes purple and yellow and blue and red and….

25. pet peeves?

Derick dislikes people who just gogo go!Roswell dislikes grumpy, pessimistic people.

26. bad habits?

Derick’s always chewing on his nailswhen he’s nervous. Roswell’s is obviously his oversharing.

27. an OC they hate:

Derick hates Rosalyn when he firstmeets her, Carson kinda too.

Roswell really only hates Chief Knoxfor killing his brother.

28. random fact about them:

Afternoons at Marni’s shop are someof the only happy childhood memories Derick has.

It’s safe to assume that, at anygiven moment, Roswell’s wearing at least one brightly colored bandage for anynumber of minor injuries

29. family members?

Derick just had a mother and afather, nobody else.

Roswell only has Rosalyn now, but heconsiders the rest of the unground dwellers his family.

30. Hogwarts house?

Hufflepuff and Gryffindor (?)

31. what makes them happy?

Derick: Ragsy, coolmornings/evenings in the Burjeok forest, watching the stars and moon at night

Roswell: Lots of things! Warmsunshine, new flowers in spring, talking to anybody, going to town, pettinganimals, etc.

32. middle and last names (ifthey’re established)?

No middle names, Denmeyer is Derick’slast name and Tate is Roswell’s.

33. introvert, ambivert, orextrovert?

Derick’s heavily introverted andRoswell’s heavily extroverted

34. how old are they?

Derick’s 22 and Roswell’s 17 (he’sthe dancing queen)

35. strange quirks they have:

Does Derick’s nail-chewing count?

36. any unhealthy obsessions?

Why did mom and dad leave, why wasn’t I enough?

For Roswell, nothing really. He’spretty healthy overall

37. looks like they could kill butis actually a cinnamon roll, looks like a cinnamon roll but could actually killyou, looks like a cinnamon roll and is actually a cinnamon roll, looks likethey could kill you and could actually kill you, or sinnamon roll

Both are totally pure cinnamon rolls

38. how smart are they?

Derick’s actually fairly smart. He’sgot a lot of practical knowledge from several years on his own.

Roswell’s fairly smart. He’s still ateen, so he’s got a lot to learn, but he’s intelligent!

39. master planner or masterimproviser?

Improviser, and about half-and-half

40. species/race?

Both human, both white

41. cat or dog person?

Derick loves both with all his heart

Roswell prefers dogs because they’remore open and obvious with their love and affection

42. where are they from?

Both are from Cirsca!

43. moral alignment? 

Derick’s Lawful neutral, and Roswell’sNeutral Good

44. what is their dominant hand?

Both are right-handed

45. do you have headcanons for them?

Plenty

46. can they sing?

Derick’s not terrible, but he wouldnever draw that much attention to himself. Roswell probably shouldn’t

47. what horror-movie characterstereotype are they?

Derick would be the one that refusesto investigate the creepy noises, gets left in the living room by himself,probably winds up dying then.

Roswell is one of the first to die,he was probably the one that went to check out the creepy noises

48. how well can they worktechnology?

Derick’s better than most of thegang, since he worked in the capital city. Roswell doesn’t have a lot ofexperience with technology, so he probably wouldn’t be very good

49. which Marvel or DCsuperhero/villain would they be?

Both would actually fit CharlesXavier pretty well. Just with his whole “I don’t want to fight, I just want tobe accepted” thing?

50. how well do they develop overthe course of the story?

I want to say pretty well? I’mhoping to have Derick go from “coward who would rather stay home thanpotentially help others and stand up for his beliefs” to “scared guy who bravely facesdanger anyways for the sake of his friends and what’s right”

Roswell gets his own development,but you know, spoilers.

51. are they more humble or moreegotistical?

Humble, definitely

52. who would they be in a Disneymovie?

Derick would be snow White, justhappily traipsing through the woods with a flock of animals

Roswell would be the comedic sidekickor loyal animal companion

53. how many languages can theyspeak?

Just english

54. early-bird or night-owl?

Derick’s a night owl, and Roswell isboth since he never sleeps

55. how meme-y are they?

Derick would probably know more memesthan he’d like, because Carson and Lorelei would share them all with him.Roswell would be one of the meme-iest

56. how close are they to theirfamily?

Biological family? Derick’s not atall close, and Roswell is very close to Rosalyn.

57. do they have suicidal thoughtsor actions?

Derick kinda does but not like another oc of mine andRoswell doesn’t – he’s doing well

58. what is their preferred weapon?

Both can work a gun, but neitherlikes to fight (except I think I’m gonna give Derick a shield instead)

Thanks!!

[princesstadashi]

Get to know me tag

Tagged by @princess-kidatheart17​

Rules: Answer these 92 statements and tag 20 people

1. Drink: Mountain Dew (although I’m trying to cut down on it ‘cause I know it’s hurting my teeth... ^^;) 2. Phone call: NYOPE BYEEEEEEEE 3. Text message: Better than call, but still not great.  4. Song you listen to: “If I Die Young” (there’s a cover I love done by a guy but it was in an AMV and no source to the artist so I don’t know who sang it :() 5. Time you cried: Most days.

HAVE YOU: 6. Dated someone twice: Had a couple dates about two years ago but for the most part no reciprocated romance </3 7. Kissed someone and regretted it: Never kissed anyone.

8. Been cheated on: Nope.

9. Lost someone special: No one has ever died IRL that I’m close to, but I’ve had some people move away/move on that have been hard. Now if we’re talking fictional characters? ...I AM RIDING THE DENIAL TRAIN FAAAARRRR AWAY. 10. Been depressed: There’s an option other than being depressed? 11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: No drinking for me with all my mental illnesses.

LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS: 12-14: White, pink, charcoal grey

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU: 15. Made new friends: Yeah, lots of awesome new tumblr friends this year! :D 16. Fallen out of love: It’s... Complicated. 17. Laughed until you cried: Oh yes, just last night XD 18. Found out someone was talking about you: Apparently the kids in my high school had rumors that i was gay. Joke’s on you guys, I actually AM gay and I can’t wait to see their faces at the reunion when I hopefully walk in with a girl on my arm XD 19. Met someone who changed you: Yes, my best friend <3 20. Found out who your friends are: Yeah 21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: No kissing for me so far :P

GENERAL: 22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: Almost everyone--have a couple people from cosplay groups, but I don’t usually add strangers. 23. Do you have any pets: Sadly no, not right now. I want a cat! 24. Do you want to change your name: Sometimes I wish people IRL would call me Dashi. 25. What did you do for your last Birthday: Day of I worked, but my bro took me out to the mall the Sunday after and my birth parents took me to see Cars 3 the weekend before so that was nice. 26. What time do you wake up: If I’m on vacation/weekends, if I can I’ll stay up ‘til 4:00 am and sleep in until 2-2:30 pm XD 27. What were you doing at midnight last night: Crying about having to go home... 28. Name something you can’t wait for: For me and my best friend actually to live in the same state and hopefully have an apartment together! 29. When was the last time you saw your mom: Last week for my adopted mom and a couple weeks ago for my birth mom (which I’m not complaining about on the latter...) 30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: Main one is private, but maybe that all my online friends actually lived close to me? 31. What are you listening to right now: My best friend playing Disney Infinity 32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: I had a teacher named Coach Thomas, if that counts! 33. Something that is getting on your nerves: When I go out of my way to be noncontroversial/spare other people’s feelings to be nice and then people don’t extend me the same courtesy. (Especially when it come to ships.) 34. Most visited website: Deviant Art or Tumblr ^^

LOST QUESTIONS. I JUST PUT IN RANDOM INFO ABOUT ME 35. Mole/s: Lots, but most noticeably one below my nose on the right side and one by my left ear (I worry that they might end up being cancerous so they might eventually have to be removed, yikes...) 36. Mark/s: A weird bump on my scalp, some old *trigger warning* self harm scars that show up when I tan too much 37. Childhood dream: Be a cowgirl (after seeing Toy Story 2), to run a bed and breakfast, or to be a mermaid (would still love that one <3), to publish a book (still working on that!!!) 38. Hair color: Dark blonde, almost brown 39. Long or short hair: Really freaking long. (Down to my waist, but I definitely want it longer!) 40. Do you have a crush on someone: My romance life is a hot mess, let’s not go there. 41. What do you like about yourself: I’m really good at writing and doing arts and crafts stuff. :) I also like that I’m apparently a pretty good listener ^^. 42. Piercings: Naw, I’m scared of needles ^^;  43. Blood type: O- (I think--I just know that I’m the universal donor!) 44. Nickname: Dashi/Nii-chan/Oneesan/Mein Schwester  45. Relationship status: Very much single with no real prospects.  46. Zodiac: Cancer 47. Pronouns: She/Her, but I’m genderfluid so I’m cool with They/Them or He/Him ^^ 48. Favorite TV Show: Oh man, too many to choose from! XD Star Wars Rebels come to mind for cartoons, and I also love Glee and Parks & Rec for live action shows!

49. Tattoos: None at present. I’d love to have Tadashi tattooed on my back and possibly a Baymax or Hiro on my right ankle ^^ 50. Right or left hand: Right. 51. Surgery: None, and terrified of anesthesia so hopefully none for a good long while... 52. Hair dyed in different color: Never permanent dye (sprayed it a couple times for Halloween as a kid), and I’ve considered long and pink or a boy-short chop and dying it black, but I like my hair the way it is for the most part so I just use lots of wigs for now XD 53. Sport: NOOOO. I mean, I did ice skating for a bit in 6th grade and it was fun, but other than that I absolutely hate them, watching or participating >.< 55. Vacation: Going to see my best friend, of course! And anywhere Disney! Me and the best friend want to visit all the Disney Parks at some point so there’s that! (I would also love to go to England someday!) 56. Pair of trainers: I’m assuming this means the U.S. word “sneakers”? I personally love high tops but only ever owned one pair and they’ve not particularly practical. ^^; Same thing goes for boots (my favorite type of footwear, although I only have, like, one pair that are pretty beat up at this point.) So usually I wear my really comfy plain black work sneakers if I want to be comfortable ^^

MORE GENERAL: 57. Eating: Nothing right now, but possibly some chips and french onion dip in a bit 58. Drinking: Sparkling lemonade 59. I’m about to: Get food, probably XD 61. Waiting for: My life to sort itself the fuck out  62. Want: Same as above. Fredashi and Hezra being canon would also be awesome. More realistically? To finish my book and maybe be lucky enough for it to be mildly successful. 63. Get married: Probably not unless things sort themselves out :/ 64. Career: Someday hopefully a librarian and an author

WHICH IS BETTER 65. Hugs or kisses: Probably hugs since I love cuddling but I’ve never kissed anyone so no real experience to go on. 66. Lips or eyes: Definitely eyes! 67. Shorter or taller: I like being short-ish for the most part--most of my friends are taller than me, but it is fun meeting people who are actually shorter than me XD 68. Older or younger: Probably older? Most of my friends are older than me ^^ 70. Nice arms or nice stomach: Nice stomach, maybe? TBH I have some body image issues/*trigger warning*mild anorexia so I try not to put too much focus on my physical appearance 71. Sensitive or loud: EXTREMELY sensitive 72. Hook up or relationship: Relationship, definitely. (I’m ace, so no hooking up for me ^^;) 73. Troublemaker or hesitant: Very much hesitant.

HAVE YOU EVER: 74. Kissed a Stranger: NOPE. 75. Drank hard liquor: DOUBLE NOPE. 76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: Yes, and also broken glasses. 77. Turned someone down: Yeah ^^; 78. Sex on the first date: Nope, I’m ace so none for me 79. Broken someone’s heart: I hope not, and if so, I’m very sorry!!! 80. Had your heart broken: Yep. 81. Been arrested: No, and I pray it never happens to me! (If I did, it wold probably be for being in the wrong place at the wrong time, I try to avoid doing anything even remotely illegal ^^;) 82. Cried when someone died: Yeah, I cry about everyone and everything, IRL or fictional 83. Fallen for a friend: Yep....

DO YOU BELIEVE IN: 84. Yourself: Sometimes yes, sometimes no. 85. Miracles: I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for a whole bunch of miracles, so hell yeah. 86. Love at first sight: I believe in attraction at first sight, but I really think you need to get to know someone in order to truly be in love with them. 87. Santa Claus: I was brought up not believing in him, but I would love for him to be real <3 88. Kiss on the first date: Definitely not for me, a kiss is something very sacred to me. But if that’s your thing, go for it!!!

OTHER: 90. Current best friend name: KingdomHeartsLover! 91. Eye color: Bluish/Greenish, depends on what I’m wearing/lighting 92. Favorite movie: BIG HERO 6, you guys should know this XD

((Randomly doing this while on vacation for fun, but I probably won’t actually be on until Thursday--see you guys then!))

[613526362]

What the Koala Bear Saw

It's very possible, that, four days from now, I will officially be wrong. It's very likely that, In four days, I will see her again Redacted We were talking on the phone. And she did what I FUCKING HATE MORE THAN ANYTHING Sorry. Sorry. Let me calm down. If I can Because I really don't like it when girls tell me something I said is just like their ex So, I was answering something she had asked, and I said, "If I got injured working in Africa, or I gave up on it, or I accomplished what I wanted to, maybe I would come back. I would come back, and maybe I would adopt kids. I would probably raise them alone. Or maybe I would just get dogs and live somewhere I've always wanted to live, live in nature, and give up medicine. I wouldn't work medicine, or, at least, not at the pace I do now. I would work just enough to get by." She stopped me. She told me what I was saying was almost exactly something her ex had said, and it was making her feel uncomfortable. She was trying to distance herself from him, and from his memory. I pushed in. I tried to ask more, about him. But she withdrew. We stumbled around with our words, with our intentions for a minute or two. I realized I needed to change the conversation. Not just veer it off in one direction, but stop its course and turn it around altogether. "Can I tell you a story?" "Of course you can." "What are you doing?" "I'm lying in bed." "Okay, I'll tell you two stories. The first one is my favorite EMS call ever." I started to tell her the story, but when I got a minute in, I stopped. "I'm hearing some noises in the background. Are you still lying in bed?" "Yes, I'm just lying here, listening to your voice. And touching myself." That threw me off for a second. I then reminded myself that oh yeah, that's right, this new significant person in my life, she's a sex addict. And somehow I'm okay with that. "So we got to the emergency room and....." I continued the story. I tried to pour some emotion into it and vary my intonation as we approached the more significant parts of the story. When I finished the story, I asked her, "Are you masturbating?" "No.....Um, I stopped. Your story, it just, it was so touching. You were so kind." Mission accomplished. True love beat fake love once again. Now for the real challenge though. "So can I tell you another story?" "Of course you can." "Are you sure? This story is kind of big. I'm not sure if you're ready for it." "Keep talking. Tell me." I had never done anything like this. And I'm not sure if Six Pounds was a script for my life or if my life was a script for Six Pounds. But, I was actually scared shitless. I didn't have a clue. I didn't even have an animal in mind. No plot. No climax. No resolution. No moral of the story. Not even a setting I could come up with. I considered a pond, but what the fuck in the pond. I quickly decided a salamander would just suck. Could I use a princess? Oh god no. That's been done and done. I stuttered around for a second, and then I just told myself this hopefully is one of those things that you just have to start. "Okay. So....." Redacted This morning I went to go see one of my old classmates. When I walked in his apartment, it was like 50 seconds before he took me over to his wife and said, "So either Sarah gained a lot of weight since you last saw her, or she's pregnant!" As we walked down the street, they told me this church had a lot of Asians in attendance, mostly professionals from the surrounding area. Even some doctors. Two hours later as I sat uncomfortably in a fold out chair surrounding by 30 Filipinos - half of whom were coughing from upper respiratory infections - in the back room of a house retrofitted into a chapel, the pastor looked right at me. He said, "Do impossible. Do impossible without think about it. Just walk feet forward and you will done impossible." Yeah, it makes me feel good to hear you validate it. But really, I'm already a few steps ahead of you. Redacted "The koala bear had a large family. He was at the bottom of the trees Um....... And, And he climbed up to get some shrubbery. Now, I don't need to go into detail about what koala bears eat, what type of shrubbery, and berries, and plums they prefer. It's not relevant to the character development or climax or resolution. But let me just say, he climbed up to get some shrubbery. Because he was hungry. And that's when he saw it. He saw it, way up there. It was a purple berry. Although he immediately...." (Okay, I'm sorry to interject, but basically, I told this story for like 10 fucking minutes. It's going to take me forever to write it all down. So just suffice it to say, he goes for the fucking purple berry and has to climb really high. He gets up, and he's like two arm lengths from grabbing the mythical purple berry that everyone has always told him about but he's never actually gotten - the purple berry that his very genetics drive him to want - and then he sees something else.) The Koala bear never imagined, anything like this. All of a sudden, there wasn't a purple berry anymore. I mean, there was And actually it was two arm lengths away But he couldn't even see it anymore Because he was so focused, So focused on..... What he had never expected to see Something so unfathomable And beautiful And amazing And unbelievable The Koala bear just, just Froze And his eyes, They did that thing that you've probably seen other people's do When they see something that shocks them, something they never imagined Then, a thought occurred to the Koala bear. "How, how is it that no one has ever told me about this? I've been hearing about the purple berry my whole life. I've always known what the purple berry is, and how much I want it. We all want it. But...." The Koala bear was high, high in the tree, as he thought all these things. And as he did, he started to realize it. He had come very high, so high, so extraordinarily high that he could see above the trees for the first time in his life. Still in awe of what he was seeing, still in disbelief, with his eyes locked in gaze on.............it. He became afraid. [Between heavy breaths] "I........I.......What.......What if.....[breathing very heavy now, and sounding quite scared]......What if, no one who ever got this high........ Made it back down to tell the story?" Redacted I could barely hear static in the phone, so I knew the call hadn't dropped. I hadn't heard a word out of her for a while though. She could have fallen asleep. As the seconds passed, and five became ten became fifteen. Okay. Maybe the call dropped. But I kept waiting. Waiting for her to say the first word. I wanted her reaction. Raw. Redacted "Okay..........so, Go on." "Um, actually I really have to go pee. And I have to let you go." "Okay, so call me back then." "Actually, I have to get up for school in the morning, and I need to get some rest." "Aren't you going to finish the story?" "That's the end of the story. I made the whole thing up off the top of my head. It was actually a metaphor. Although I think it's called something else when a metaphor is stretched out to story length." "Why did you do that?" Fucking practical people. Why can't I meet someone artistic every now and then. God. "Well, so, My favorite movie is Six Pounds. And in Six Pounds, these two people meet each other - a man and a woman. It's clear from the start that they're not going to be boyfriend or girlfriend. It's clear they won't be husband of wife. But still, they both need, and they fulfill each other in a way that they can't express. They're drawn into each other and fill that need inside of each other. At one point, he's running through the rain, and talking to her on the phone. She's in the hospital, and she asked him to tell her a story. He didn't have a story, so he made one up, about a little boy who wanted to fly. That's what I just did for you. I made up a fairy tale. Was it okay?" "Yes, it was perfect. Whenever I talk to you, it's always perfect. I'm just sad that this is the last time I get to talk to you tonight." It was 12:30, so I was really fucking curious as to what she could have meant by that. But oh yeah, then I remembered. This new significant person in my life, Well, She's a sex addict. And most addiction happens late at night. Redacted The funny thing about the redacted blog, is that I have to go back and remove things or it's not the redacted blog anymore. So, at this point, I realize I've said way too many specific details. Literally, She could just google "Koala bear purple berry" and find this entire fucking blog. So I should change the Koala bear to a, I don't know What else climbs in a fucking tree And the berry, well, It could just as well be red. But here's the crazy thing. I'm okay with it being a Koala Bear. And the berry being purple. She........ She is special. Redacted It was all a lie - the dog, and the leaving medicine, and the raising children, by myself, because I don't think a relationship with a woman would ever work. It was all a lie. The truth is, I'm not coming back. But even if I want to, I can't tell her that. And deep inside, I know. Even if she's special Even very special She can't see it I should stop trying to be the purple berry. Because she can't see what the Koala Bear saw. I am mentally ill. I have psychiatric illness. And it has given me the power to kill myself to help others. It has set me free from anything that has ever held me back. But it's a one in a billion thing. Not many people see, what the Koala Bear saw.