#and really we should all be so lucky

[inkskinned]

the thing about art is that it was always supposed to be about us, about the human-ness of us, the impossible and beautiful reality that we (for centuries) have stood still, transfixed by music. that we can close our eyes and cry about the same book passage; the events of which aren't real and never happened. theatre in shakespeare's time was as real as it is now; we all laugh at the same cue (pursued by bear), separated hundreds of years apart.

three years ago my housemates were jamming outdoors, just messing around with their instruments, mostly just making noise. our neighbors - shy, cautious, a little sheepish - sat down and started playing. i don't really know how it happened; i was somehow in charge of dancing, barefoot and laughing - but i looked up, and our yard was full of people. kids stacked on the shoulders of parents. old couples holding hands. someone had brought sidewalk chalk; our front walk became a riot of color. someone ran in with a flute and played the most astounding solo i've ever heard in my life, upright and wiggling, skipping as she did so. she only paused because the violin player was kicking his heels up and she was laughing too hard to continue.

two weeks ago my friend and i met in the basement of her apartment complex so she could work out a piece of choreography. we have a language barrier - i'm not as good at ASL as i'd like to be (i'm still learning!) so we communicate mostly through the notes app and this strange secret language of dancers - we have the same movement vocabulary. the two of us cracking jokes at each other, giggling. there were kids in the basement too, who had been playing soccer until we took up the far corner of the room. one by one they made their slow way over like feral cats - they laid down, belly-flat against the floor, just watching. my friend and i were not in tutus - we were in slouchy shirts and leggings and socks. nothing fancy. but when i asked the kids would you like to dance too? they were immediately on their feet and spinning. i love when people dance with abandon, the wild and leggy fervor of childhood. i think it is gorgeous.

their adults showed up eventually, and a few of them said hey, let's not bother the nice ladies. but they weren't bothering us, they were just having fun - so. a few of the adults started dancing awkwardly along, and then most of the adults. someone brought down a better sound system. someone opened a watermelon and started handing out slices. it was 8 PM on a tuesday and nothing about that day was particularly special; we might as well party.

one time i hosted a free "paint along party" and about 20 adults worked quietly while i taught them how to paint nessie. one time i taught community dance classes and so many people showed up we had to move the whole thing outside. we used chairs and coatracks to balance. one time i showed up to a random band playing in a random location, and the whole thing got packed so quickly we had to open every door and window in the place.

i don't think i can tell you how much people want to be making art and engaging with art. they want to, desperately. so many people would be stunning artists, but they are lied to and told from a very young age that art only matters if it is planned, purposeful, beautiful. that if you have an idea, you need to be able to express it perfectly. this is not true. you don't get only 1 chance to communicate. you can spend a lifetime trying to display exactly 1 thing you can never quite language. you can just express the "!!??!!!"-ing-ness of being alive; that is something none of us really have a full grasp on creating. and even when we can't make what we want - god, it feels fucking good to try. and even just enjoying other artists - art inherently rewards the act of participating.

i wasn't raised wealthy. whenever i make a post about art, someone inevitably says something along the lines of well some of us aren't that lucky. i am not lucky; i am dedicated. i have a chronic condition, my hands are constantly in pain. i am not neurotypical, nor was i raised safe. i worked 5-7 jobs while some of these memories happened. i chose art because it mattered to me more than anything on this fucking planet - i would work 80 hours a week just so i could afford to write in 3 of them.

and i am still telling you - if you are called to make art, you are called to the part of you that is human. you do not have to be good at it. you do not have to have enormous amounts of privilege. you can just... give yourself permission. you can just say i'm going to make something now and then - go out and make it. raquel it won't be good though that is okay, i don't make good things every time either. besides. who decides what good even is?

you weren't called to make something because you wanted it to be good, you were called to make something because it is a basic instinct. you were taught to judge its worth and over-value perfection. you are doing something impossible. a god's ability: from nothing springs creation.

a few months ago i found a piece of sidewalk chalk and started drawing. within an hour i had somehow collected a small classroom of young children. their adults often brought their own chalk. i looked up and about fifteen families had joined me from around the block. we drew scrangly unicorns and messed up flowers and one girl asked me to draw charizard. i am not good at drawing. i basically drew an orb with wings. you would have thought i drew her the mona lisa. she dragged her mother over and pointed and said look! look what she drew for me and, in the moment, i admit i flinched (sorry, i don't -). but the mother just grinned at me. he's beautiful. and then she sat down and started drawing.

someone took a picture of it. it was in the local newspaper. the summary underneath said joyful and spontaneous artwork from local artists springs up in public gallery. in the picture, a little girl covered in chalk dust has her head thrown back, delighted. laughing.

[ingravinoveritas]

No but can you imagine Michael keeping this a secret from David and surprising him when it’s all finished and they’ve moved in. Just Imagine the look on David’s face when he realizes what Michael’s done and the happiness at the realization that they get to see each other everyday whenever they want. It’s so beautiful and I’m so happy and excited for them.

Aww. Well, this certainly is a lovely thought. I will say, though, that in the interest of balance, it's also likely that Michael is renting the house, since he does not live in London full time. I'm also not sure that he and David would be living together necessarily, but I absolutely do love the thought that he surprised David with the initial news of renting/buying the house next door. It's likely that a decorator was hired to furnish the place, but I could also see Michael having one room kept aside for him to decorate himself, and that room being one that is just for David.

So I think both of those things--the house itself, and then the room Michael picked out and decorated on his own--would make a beautiful surprise, and I could picture David being utterly overwhelmed at realizing he and Michael can see each other whenever they want. Because it's not like filming a show or interview where they have to see each other...with this, they are choosing to see each other. Again, calling back to this interview from 2019, which now seems incredibly prescient:

"We'd have to do it by choice from now on, wouldn't we?" "It'll be quite embarrassing to go, 'Can we just...see each other? For no reason?'"

It honestly leaves me breathless to think that this was five years ago, and now this is exactly what's happened. The tentativeness from Michael--so unlike him--quietly hoping for something that he wasn't sure would ever happen. Two seasons of Good Omens, three seasons of Staged, and an entire pandemic later, the whole world has turned upside down, and despite so many things falling apart, Michael and David's relationship seems deeper and stronger than ever before.

That they have chosen this, chosen each other--whether as friends or as something more--becomes clearer every day, and I very much share your sentiments of happiness and excitement for them...

[dont-offend-the-bees]

Fuck I hate being an adult. I need a more adult adult to help with the volatile emotional situation.

[tomatoluvr69]

Ohhhhhh my goddddddddd so I’ve basically been to the doctor three times since turning 18 and aging out of the pediatrician because of my horrible doctor fears and issues. So it’s a MOMENTOUS occasion and the culmination of years of glacial self-work that I felt ready FINALLY READY to sit down and make a doctors appointment for a routine visit!! Like that is give or take a decade in the making…….and all the ethereal alchemical elements were correct so I could finally do it this morning. But the clinic is closed and you can only do it weekdays ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️ ok guess I am going to the doctor in 10 years probably. See you 2034

[jakeperalta]

spent weeks psyching myself up to stand up to my mum and then immediately got shot down by her 😃👍

[marypsue]

If I were lucky enough to attract a loyal following of goths, I would simply not slag off the subculture in interviews in a desperate and pathetic attempt to get the mainstream to consider me a real artist. RIP to every musician goths have ever loved but I'm different.

[katierosefun]

one day i won’t start crying the second i leave my college friends to board a train! today is not that day!

[nanierose]

Ok but thinking more about Aabria's answer regarding Deanna's afterlife, I can't help but think how her devotion to others often ends up hurting her.

For centuries she would send her husband back to the living, telling him it was ok to move on from her and that it wasn't his time. Even in death she made sure her partner was loved and safe. And then her husband resurrects her, only to essentially leave her on her own. No help to transition her into this new world and find her feet after being dead so long. He just fulfilled a promise and saw that as his duty done. And that must have hurt so much. I can't imagine how I would feel if my husband brought me back only to leave, it would be heart-breaking.

Then there's her devotion to Frida. Over two years they've been her constant companion, and they've helped each other through the struggle of finding a new life after being dead for centuries. Always putting Deathward on them, and the terror she felt when they risked their life. Frida protecting Deanna because they know she can't take the hits as easily. But now Frida has FCG and that relationship is quickly being redefined, and while Deanna is happy for them it's still difficult. It hurt her more than she thought it would.

I don't think Deanna would regret her choices, because she cares deeply about the people she loves. She wants them to be happy, but I wonder if a small part of her feels like she's always the one left behind. Maybe that's why seeing Chetney again, and him showing interest in her, was such a rush because he came back to her. He might have left but he apologised and made her feel good (in more ways than one). Plus this time she knew what the terms were, it wasn't as big a shock when he left because their time was always going to be limited.

I love how Aabria played her and I hope we get to see Deanna again because she is a fantastic character to watch.

[queen-susans-revenge]

Ever since finishing Journey I've been restless, without a creative focus, and without even many mundane demands since my kids are all in school now.

It's a real trip, by the way, going from a decade-plus spent as a 24/7 on call caregiver with barely the time to form a full coherent thought, to... a pampered housewife with few demands on her time.

I keep asking Sam if I should get a real job. Our "deal" -- which was only ever the deal that I proposed, and clung to, throughout those hard years when even being by myself in the shower felt like a snatched luxury...the deal was, that after the crunch was over, I'd get two years to write and market a novel.

Well. Journey took five years to write, and hasn't been sold yet. But it's still useful for me to be home and flexibly "on call" for childcare in case of illness or Sam having an out-of-town conference or whatever, and also I do still cook every night. I'm not entirely useless. Just...mostly.

One day not so long ago Sam came into the bathroom in the middle of the day, when I was having a luxurious candlelit bubble bath soak. "Should I...get a job?" I asked weakly.

"Nah," he said. "You're fine. You do plenty."

But I objectively do...not that much. I have SO MUCH time in the day now, I have hella time, and I'm not even writing. Journey is in the slush pile with Baen and I don't have a current project. I'm getting itchy and restless with it. It's like I'm retired at 47.

I don't have a conclusion for this. It's just where I am. It's not a bad place by any measure; no, I'm incredibly lucky. I've always been so fucking lucky.

[ingravinoveritas]

irvinis replied to your post “Favorite moment of Michael and David on Graham…”

@ingravinoveritas I love how David turns to Michael to once again explain to him in person that it was a minor scratch and he was fine. It's as if Michael is constantly worrying about his every injury or slightest inconvenience (he is.)

@irvinis Oh, I love this. I definitely do think Michael is so obvious in how much he worries about David, and Michael seemingly confirmed this when he talked about being the "attack dog" who goes and speaks on his and David's behalf:

And it becomes even sweeter when you think of David calling Michael his "emotional support pet" in 2021, which shows how how much they were leaning on each other even back then, and how that's likely much more the case now:

But there are so many other ways that Michael and David have shown how much they care for/worry about each other. I'm particularly thinking of when Michael had Covid in March 2021 and was in a bad way, all while in New York filming Prodigal Son. David and Georgia were checking in on him and AL on a daily basis. I can so easily imagine David and Michael video-calling and David trying to cheer Michael up any way he could.

That also makes me think of right now, with Michael being out from Nye for several performances this week due to being sick. Only this time, he's in London, which means David could be there checking in on him in person. Maybe making him a cup of tea, or holding Michael in his arms just to help him get to sleep/calm his mind down. (It could also explain why we haven't really heard/seen anything from David since the Oliviers, but that's entirely speculation, of course.)

I just love how there are so many of these little instances of Michael and David quietly caring and worrying about each other, both in and out of the public eye, and how even the public moments are not there for visibility or to sell something, but because Michael and David just genuinely love each other. How much I wish we could all find someone who cares about us like that...

[imwritesometimes]

my brother every time he gets sick: don't come near me I don't want you to get sick throw shit into my room for me like I'm a wild animal at the zoo

me playing along every time despite the fact that we live in a pretty small house and it's almost impossible not to get one another sick but I appreciate the gesture: hucks tissues into his room like a steak into the lion enclosure at feeding time

[tortademaracuya]

Everyday is the same wake up look for jobs eat look for jobs talk with my friends who are also looking for jobs apply to a job get rejected look for a job get ghosted get ghosted a driend has shared a job they think I would like I share one for her back we get ghosted look for jobs we cry together

[thatrandombystander]

Just got back from watching a production of Les Mis and yeah man to love another person really is to see the face of God 😭😭😭

[aloysarrow]

I wish GI wasn't trying to push people (kinda specifically longer players) away from the game, like damn. I really hope new players are watching closely and not just deciding "there are haters" or "complainers." Some of the things, like the age old where's the end-of-game road map, have been actual game needs that haven't been addressed for years. Game needs, guys. Idk, if you still call some people haters/complainers, then I'm probably gonna call you a bootlicker lol

[thedreadvampy]

talking a lot about rabbit meat atm. One track mind.

anyway when me and my twin were like 2 and the social worker came round to check on us as a standard checkup (my mum was effectively a single mother of three toddlers living several miles out of town at that time so in need of some support), my sibling toddled up to her as she was leaving and said very firmly,

"You don't eat rabbits what have been runned over. You eat rabbits what have been shot."

rabbits were not a topic of conversation at the time. this was an unsolicited Toddler Fact. anyway that's what I think about whenever I think about rabbit. you don't eat rabbits what have been runned over.

[transbee]

having did and being online in any capacity is so fucking exhausting because you literally can't go anywhere without seeing the most heinous takes about your existence or validity it's like. can we be normal. can we please be normal and Chill for like two seconds.