#and started smiling like the grinch fr

[jacquelying]

snowing hard this morning. the terror ice master failed to predict the ice shifting the ship to the opposite angle. Only thing he said was “we slidin” i cant stop thinking about this

[weird-dere-writes]

The way I would SHOVE Sakura out of the way and be in your space like 🙂 “correction. Nirei isn’t his friend he’s MY Bestfriend 🙂🙂🙂.”

I see you glance his way a second time and I’m just sipping punch and spouting off facts like “he’s single. a virgo. could save your life with his type O blood. Do you wanna say hi? 🙂🙂🙂”

Sakura has to literally drag my nosy ass away when Akihiko makes his rounds to chat up everyone and comes to politely introduce himself to you when he doesn’t recognize your face. He gets excited about the outfit you wore to the party and starts asking you questions about where you shop/and is genuinely interested in learning more about your vibes.

I’m like the grinch smiling watching your meet cute unfold rubbing my hands together like a grubby little fly on the wall while sakura is shoving me out the door so he can get his one on one time with me aksnsjkwjw

No but seriously, akihiko nirei is my blorbo bestie fr TELL ME MOREEEE 👀

PLSSSSS KAIL UR GONNA KILL ME LMAO

The more you spit random facts about him, the more I want to hide, bc I know if you're doing that I am obvious to you! And if you can tell, then probably others at the party can too!! 😖

"Do you wanna say hi?"

YES.

But also NO.

I am just a baby I cannot do this 🫣.

I finally get a breather when Sakura pulls you away ONLY TO HAVE MY HEART JUMP UP INTO MY THROAT WHEN AKIHIKO MATERIALIZES OUT OF NOWHERE.

Something about the way he introduces himself calms me, though. And when he starts gushing about my outfit, I feel flattered because I wasn't sure it was dressed right for this kind of party? I'm just a soft girly in a slay world.

(Le fit)

When he asks me about where I shop, I tell him I don't shop much, but when I do, I go to (insert place here). A lot of the stuff they have is cute and actually fits a body like mine! And he just lights up because that is one of his favorite places to get clothes and accesories too!

He tells me a funny story about something that happened to him there one time and my eyes just about pop put of my sockets laughing because I realize I was actually there at the time to witness this silly thing happen. And I'm just like "OMG WAIT- that was you?!"

And he hits me back with a "OMG WAIT- you saw that?!"

And we're both just smiling and laughing about it.

I'm enjoying myself so much I don't even notice the grubby fly hand rubbing aura that I normally 100% would from miles away emanating from you LMAO.

From there, we kinda just start talking and sticking to one another for most of the party (except for when bofurin boys drag him away for something, but he always comes back).

At some point during the party I notice you and Haruka are gone and I have that same energy of grinch smile and grubby fly hand rubbing, knowing EXACTLY what you two are doing but as BF and GF now >:DDDDDDD. Me making a mental note in my head to tease u and ask about all the details later 😏.

BUT N E WAY. As the party is wrapping up, Nirei tells me he thinks I'm really pretty and I get so bashful about it sobs. Since you and Haruka are still long gone in the high heavens of the bone zone somewhere (pffft), Nirei offers to take me home <3.

We exchange numbers and have started texting here and there since then uwu 🫶🏾.

[indecisive-dizzy]

Hmm,,,,,,,,,, howdy/eddie angst cause they won’t leave my brain

I love them, I love them so much. So they need to suffer >:)

Howdy is a petty ex, I can’t see it any other way

I think they dated in high school, but Howdy’s internalized homophobia kinda definitely ruined things

I think howdy said some… not nice things to Eddie (that he totally doesn’t think about himself haha 😅) and that ended the relationship

Howdy still has feelings, but he still hasn’t fully accepted himself for being bisexual so he pushes them away

Eddie was a hot mess after their breakup, he felt like he failed their relationship even though he tried his best to make things work

What Howdy said stuck with him for years. It was the first time someone he loved told him such things to his face and it haunts him

When they’re adults, Eddie tries to be cordial but Howdy just avoids him and is very bitter either with him

Howdy will never admit it, but in their relationship he liked Eddie more when he was in drag because he could pretend his relationship was “normal”

Howdy is so internalized it hurts but it still didn’t excuse him treating his bf like trash 😔

For extra angst Eddie dates Latter later on and their relationship is actually really happy and healthy

That drives Howdy up the wall, there’s now way someone could like LATTER more than him (I love u latter this is Howdy’s thoughts not mine :,3)

Lizzy tries to be supportive of Howdy’s struggles, but there’s a reason she confided in Latter that she was a lesbian before Howdy :(

Rip Eddie Dear you would’ve loved Chappel Roan

He listens to Pink Pony Club and cries in drag

Casual and Good Luck, Babe give me their relationship vibes

Also Lizzy’s girlfriend is called Gabby and she’s very pretty :)

Random but I think they both stood up Daisey at least once lmao

They’re just hanging out with Daisey and something comes up so they have to go and accidentally end up ditching Daisey

They’re just sitting at the bus stop with one of their coats, smoking a cigarette as they’re waiting for the bus. If they had a nickel for the amount of times that’s happened, they’d have two nickels. Which isn’t a lot but it’s weird that it happened twice /ref

Either way I think they need to talk it out. And Howdy needs to smooch a man without being ashamed of it- *cough cough* Barnany- *cough cough*

My brain is full of them so this seems kinda random lmao

Have a good day/night pookie :D

The Grinch ass smile I smiled when I read "Howdy is a petty ex" lmaooo HE IS. This man in insufferable and I want to put him in a blender (affectionate)

Howdy projecting his internalized problems onto others sob. my brain came up with the idea that the things Howdy said he didn't say in a purposefully offensive way? like "well yeah duh everyone knows..." like Obviously this thing he hates abouts himself is common sense and everyone thinks this way??

idk I just don't think he started it trying to be offensive. but it was and turned into a full shouting match as Eddie got offended/hurt and emotional. Eddie left crying (sobbing)

cough Eddie pretends he either forgot Howdy all together or at least their relationship cough. blames his bad memory to be respectful and Not Have To Talk About It. Eddie with avoidance tendencies <3 my poor bbg

You're so right. Howdy already disliked Latter (gee wonder why) but now he's in a relationship with His EX. AND They're happy and healthy! Howdy's Gonna blow a fuseeee

Eddie Dear is just like me fr. I Listen to Pink Pony Club and cry. Not in drag, but that's a skill issue lol

Poor Daisey 😭😭🤣 also, reference spotted. I have way more than two nickels for everytime I've seen this ref. I could buy a yacht!

They dooo, but Howdy's bitterness and Eddie's avoidance of the subject make it Difficult. God it'd be so funny and if Frank (or Latter?) and Barnaby teamed up (unlikely duo my beloved) to Force them to talk.

Barnaby get that "If You Were Gay" song and kiss that worm akdhajdja I think it'd fix him 🤣

[leia-imogen]

aaron & the family he's found all by himself; vol. 2 // vol. 1

( ft. short jokes, a belated birthday shopping trip, & an ultra-chaotic winter break )

( for @criswisstuff & anyone who enjoyed the first one <3 )

savannah, who is 5'9, is constantly teasing aaron and cleo for being short. katelyn's good at 5'6, and also a bit impossible to tease bcs she's the actual best, so she gets to escape this

cleo ( 5'2 ) is perfectly delighted to have someone shorter than her for once in her life, even by only 2 inches

aaron: guys, just try and see this from my point of view

sav: [ collapses ]

katelyn: [ crouches down ]

cleo: [ sits cross-legged on floor ]

aaron: dude you're literally 2 inches taller than me

cleo: 2 and a quarter

sav is so smug about this but in a good-natured way, in that she and cleo call aaron "kid" or "kiddo" or "pipsqueak" and he doesn't mind bcs they always say it w such a huge smile and he likes to respond to sav with "how's the weather up there, tall-ass?"

and katelyn thinks it's ridiculously adorable how tiny aaron is and obviously she uses him as an armrest all the time

katelyn, petting aaron's hair: guys guys omg he's like an angsty mini blond kitten and i would kill for him <3

sav, popping up between them: mini-yard :))

before i get super distracted, i just wanna mention that aaron met sav and cleo towards the end of november, so they missed the twin's birthday

but sav still insists that she must take him shopping bcs sure his fashion sense is fine but there's always room for improvement, isn't there, aaron??

he relents, so long as she and cleo and katelyn ( who already gave him a birthday present?? why's she doing this??? ) don't spend too much money

sav drags him all around south carolina to the best thrift stores she can find and cleo and katelyn are amazed that she can get such fantastic deals on the supermodel clothes she wears

fr she's literally a fashion design major ( + minoring in business management ) and she shows up to class in skilfully done drugstore makeup and an absolutely killer outfit for like 15 bucks

she grew up poor, and she's still poor now, even if she ( thankfully ) managed to scrape a cheerleading scholarship

sav, flicking through a rack of dresses labelled $4 apiece: RIP to little miss rich bitch reynolds but i'm different ;)

no hate to allison she's awesome but she grew up in the lap of luxury surrounded by designer brands so she knows NOTHING about thrifting and rationing money in general

oh and sav and allison have kind of a frenemies thing going on bcs they're both fighting for the top spot of their fashion design course

they spend the whole day shopping and aaron ends up with a highly upgraded wardrobe that contains a lot of cute pastel stuff and sav's promise to do his makeup

aaron insists on paying for dinner at the really nice pizza place a short drive from campus even tho they all protest

and andrew knows he's found new friends, but has no idea that it's the vixens and he's dating one of them. nicky does tho, but he's sworn to secrecy

nicky thinks his new clothes are adorable and is stunned when aaron tells him the total cost

"oh my GOD that girl sounds like a genius."

"yeah, her name's sav. you guys,, would get along, i think."

okay now for the winter break part!!

i think that you can get permission to stay at dorms if you're an international student or something??

anyways since sav's super upset bcs her father straight-up told her not to come home bcs he has a new girlfriend ( god i hate sav's father )

katelyn would stay with her, but her dad can finally have her home in new york for christmas and she really doesn't want to miss it

cleo, the only one with a properly functional family, is going back to her big family house and loving parents and grandma and aunt and siblings and cousins. love that for her.

so aaron and sav are stuck at psu for 2 weeks and aaron's surprisingly cool with this. and sav's excited bcs for the first time since her mom died, she can spend her christmas with someone she actually wants around instead of her shitty-ass father and his constant stream of bitchy girlfriends

they spend a lot of time together, stealing food from the athlete's dining hall to make their own weird combos, which usually ends with aaron making something Cool and Interesting and sav gagging and spitting out whatever strange concoction she had previously insisted would taste good

i literally can't bring myself to give a shit about the twinyards' deal bcs andrew literally became best friends with renee?? and hooks up with guys at eden’s??? idk what's going on there but it's like andrew is trying to control aaron's life while he can do whatever he wants??? and honestly wtf????

also let me just make it clear that i ADORE andrew so so much he's one of my favourite comfort characters ever but i'm not gonna make excuses for his shitty behaviour. i fully believe he heals and puts away his pride to apologise to aaron, nicky, and kevin for his treatment of them

that's definitely not to say that aaron's internalised homophobia isn't eww, but with so many important people in his life gay, he makes a huge effort to get over it

so andrew just thinks that aaron is spending a lot of time in the library or out with nicky or something

and when aaron tells sav about this deal, she's kinda horrified, but it's pretty clear to her that aaron so desperately wants to fix his relationship with his brother, and she's not in any place to discourage him, is she?

the only thing she can do is hope that he won't come out all the worse for it

and stare at the boy curled up on the other end of the pale pink sofa cleo's parents had gotten, wonder just how much shit he'd been put through, and decide she was going to be his best friend

aaron's face has gone entirely impassive. sav nudges his fluffy-socked foot with her own, then reaches out to smooth the crease between his eyebrows. "careful, you'll wrinkle your pretty little face."

aaron is very caught off guard by this, and very promptly flushes bright red, which contrasts with the pale teal hoodie he stole from katelyn

"okay, enough talk about depressing crap. wanna go make christmas cookies now?"

"yeah."

so they make christmas cookies. well, it was supposed to be christmas cookies, but it turns into double chocolate fudge cookies somewhere along the line. neither of them knows how

them baking together is the definition of chaos. they're still blasting songs, and sav is singing along terribly

"yOu'Re A mEaN oNe, Mr. GrInCh," while poking aaron's cheek as he tries to mix something. he throws a handful of flour at her. "yOu ReAlLy ArE A hEel."

anyways obviously sav retaliates and that ends in a flour fight. it only stops when aaron deadass cracks an egg on sav's head and she smears chocolate into his hair

she also tries to make him sing along to baby, it's cold outside

"i'Ve GoT tO Go `wAAyyy~" she holds a spatula up to his face

"go away."

they video call katelyn, who takes one look at the mess in the cramped dorm kitchen and sighs so loudly and dramatically that her dad pops in and asks if everything's okay

aaron freezes up at the sight of him and sav quickly turns off the camera, bcs they both want to make good impressions on him, and being covered in various cookie ingredients just won't cut it, ya know?

the cookies turn out delicious and sav sends all their group chat various photos of the process, most of which consist of selfies with her making goofy faces while aaron is simultaneously baking and flipping off the camera

plus a several videos of sav enthusiastically dancing and mouthing the lyrics of, as follows, all i want for christmas is you, let it snow, and santa claus is coming to town and aggressively pointing a spatula at aaron

"c'mon aari, just sing! please??? please???? please you can do it i believe in you!!"

finally he just. gives up. "okay, you know what? fine, i'll sing to ONE and then you will STOP bothering me you insolent dumbass."

sav beams. santa baby starts playing. aaron is very clearly going through five stages of grief in 0.5 seconds

"go on," sav says sweetly as she slides in next to a pouting aaron, "i'll sing with you."

sav slings an arm around his shoulder and sways with him, so it's just her doing that and him grumpily mumbling the lyrics

and when the cookies are cooling down, they start cleaning the kitchen up. aaron rubs some spilled egg yolk into sav's hair but it goes pretty okay otherwise, since they're just listening to more christmas songs and chatting about light stuff, like aaron's biochem course, sav's fashion course, and their dumb classmates

aaron mostly listens tho, and learns that sav kind of hates allison reynolds for giving up her inheritance when she would do ANYTHING for even the tiniest fraction of that money

but she still thinks allison's gorgeous bcs c'mon

and that sav's dream is to one day open her own boutique!!

aaron spends most of the actual christmas day with the monsters at eden's bcs nicky and andrew wanted to

he spent a lot of the time texting on their group chat

doessavvyisgay: so u just go to a nightclub every week??

unaliveme: i mean yeah, i literally worked here for a while. we needed money and nicky was already working 2 jobs night and day

actualblessing: babe ur backstory is so tragic

unaliveme: i'm a fox for a reason ig

cleo.magda: Yes but-

doessavvyisgay renamed this conversation "aaron miniyard support group"

unaliveme: oh ffs

unaliveme: sav subject change go

doessavvyisgay: i'm at the clothes store what should i get?

actualblessing: something pretty :)

doessavvyisgay: sorry, i can't buy the cashier

cleo.magda: Wow.

doessavvyisgay: I DID GET HER NUMBER THO

unaliveme: lmaooo what's her name?

doessavvyisgay: uh

unaliveme: savannah istg u don't even know her name??

actualblessing: s a v

actualblessing: damn u really do be turning on the Charm tho

actualblessing: respect i didn't even talk to aaron till i asked him for notes bcs he has rly pretty notes and also a rly pretty face

actualblessing: and even then i was like :0

unaliveme: IT WAS CUTE I PROMISE

doessavvyisgay: u 2 = the only valid heterosexual couple

actualblessing: rt

unaliveme: oh shit i'm getting super drunk

cleo.magda: Aaron, you drink? That's not legal, get out of there right now. Kids these days-

unaliveme: cleo u have literally seen me get drunk af,, the first time we met,,, and anyways this is how my family bonds ✌🏻

doessavvyisgay: that's. so damn weird kiddo but go off ig

actualblessing: no go find better things to bond about other than alcohol and weird sweaty dancing

cleo.magda: Yeah, go watch some Christmas movies!

unaliveme: nicky makes us watch die hard every year

doessavvyisgay: see u in hell, kiddo ;)

cleo.magda: I meant things like The Polar Express and Home Alone.

actualblessing: merry christmas ya filthy animals!!

doessavvyisgay: merry xmas y'all i'm gonna go to that christmas party bcs i'm super bored

unaliveme: merry christmas mothers and fuckers

cleo.magda: Merry Christmas, you guys!

[smokeybrandreviews]

Smokey brand Select: Deck the Halls

I don’t know if you can tell by my blog, but i f*cking love Christmas. It’s my absolute favorite holiday of the year. I love t more than Thanksgiving, more than Halloween, even more than my f*cking birthday and that’s a lot because I'm kind of a f*cking narcissist. I love the festivities, the decorations, the music, the objective purity of the whole season. Christmas time is the one time of year that people decide collectively to suck less. Recently, with all of the stupid conservative boycotts and soapbox rants, that less is a little less than usually but still, it’s hard not to love the Christmas season. It’s so inspirational and has inspired some fantastic films. Here's a list of some of my favorites. A lot of these, the majority of them, probably aren’t “traditional” Christmas fare but i assure you that they are, indeed, Christmas films. To say otherwise would just be disrespectful.

10. Edward Scissorhands

Tim Burton is going to be all over this list, man. Edward Scissorhands came out during a time i was incredibly infatuated with the striking visuals of Burton. I’m an Eighties kid and he kind of had his coming out party during that decade. Almost all of those films he released back then are favorites of mine. I remember seeing Scissorhands as a young kid and being absolutely mesmerized by it’s beauty. As an adult, i appreciated the underlying messaging just as much.

9. A Christmas Story

You’ll shoot your eye out! I used to hate this movie, man. It was a staple in during my elementary school Christmas parties. I never paid attention to it because, as a kid, i hated anything that wasn’t a cartoon. One day i was sick at home and caught it offseason TNT. This thing played, like, every day for some reason. I heard it was a favorite of Ted Turner but that’s just rumor. Anyway, i watched it and completely fell in love with this earnest, absurd, flick. It’s a really good watch and deserves it’s title as a classic.

8. Home Alone

Home Alone was the very first Christmas flick i remembered actually loving for being a Christmas flick. Like, when the season starts and Mariah Carey hits the airwaves, Home Alone is what i thing about. It’s the very first film that i unequivocally associate with Santa season. It’s funny because it’s not that great a film but i still love it dearly. I think that’s more because of nostalgia, though. There are fr superior films in the honorable mentions which probably deserve this spot more but Home Alone makes me genuinely smile.

7. Die Hard

I mean, how can i not put this on the list? It’s a classic. One of the best action films ever made. One of the best performances Bruce Willis has ever given. Plus, it introduces the late, great, Alan Rickman as Hans Gruber. Now, my favorite of the lot is With a Vengeance but Die Hard would be nothing without this holly jolly first entry.

6. Scrooged

One of my favorite Christmas narratives is A Christmas Carol. Dickens was a prolific writer and, among his works, the story of Ebeneezer Scrooge’s crisis of conscious is my favorite. I almost always love it when ever it makes it to screen but, for my money, the best version of this story took the form of the Eighties classic, Scrooged. It’s so Eighties in all of the ways. I love the overall narrative, the changes made t fit it into a then modern setting, and those incredible practical effects. It’s a feast for the senses while hitting all the necessary Dickens notes. Also, this version of the Ghost of Christmas Future is a whole ass nightmare. Like, f*ck, dude!

5. Trading Places

I love this movie so much, just on it’s own merits as a film. It’s so good. Eddie Murphy is excellent in this film and Dan Akroyd is just as brilliant. Jamie Lee Curtis was incredibly hilarious, too. This was the second thing i had ever seen her in, after Halloween so, you know, going from that to this really caught my attention. Trading Places is a classic and should be seen by everyone.

4. Gremlins

Gremlins is just generally one of my favorite films. I love this f*cked up movie, man. It’s SO good and this version is the tone down one. The original vision for this movie was just an R rated murder fest. I mean, the one we got wasn’t a joke wither It’s the reason we have the PG-3 rating. SH*t is just that violent Now, juxtapose all of this little green monstrosity anarchy against a dreamy white Christmas and you have all the makings of worming your way into my heart. Honestly, i prefer the gremlin shenanigans from the sequel, Mohawk is my favorite, but Stripe definitely left an impression.

3. The Long Kiss Goodnight

I had a massive crush on Geena Davis when  was young. Can’t tell you why, but i was absolutely infatuated with the chick after i saw her in The Fly remake. I followed her career afterwards. She dropped several gems along the way, Beetlejuice, Thelma and Louise, Earth Girls are Easy, A League of their Own, but my absolute favorite film of hers is definitely The Long Kiss Goodnight. This thing is peak Nineties action excess. Shane Black in his prime. Die Hard III but John McCLane is a hot ass amazon woman who can beat you to death with her mitts. It even has Sam Jackson as a smart-mouthed side kick! I love it!

2c. A Charlie Brown Christmas

I adore Charlie Brown. If Spider-Man, Godzilla, and Transformers are the foundations of my childhood, Snoopy is foundation adjacent. My Paternal grandma had all of the Peanuts films and i would watch them on repeat when we were forced to go over there. I say forced because she was kind of terrible and none of us really wanted to visit her ever but, when we did, and she wasn’t trying to exploit our labor or feed us rotten food, we did get to watch dope classic sh*t. She owned every Disney movie from the Renaissance and every Peanuts special on VHS. I hated visiting that woman but i loved those Charlie Brown adventures so kind of bittersweet memories.

2b. How the Grinch Stole Christmas

This one is associated with my other grandma, the one i actually liked. We used to sit down every year and watch this one together while sipping egg nog. Man, it’s hard for me to type this out. It breaks my heart remembering those times so I'm going to stop. I just really love How The Grinch Stole Christmas. It’s very, very, special to me.

2a. The Nutcracker

The Nutcracker is in the same situation as How the Grinch Stole Christmas. I have a lot of love for this thing, in ll forms, but the one i remember so vividly is the opera they used to show every season. My grandma really loved opera and orchestral music. I miss her.

1b. Batman Returns

I told you Burton was going to be all over this thing. Bro, how can this thing not be on the top of this list? Batman Returns left a real impression, man. Michelle Pfiefer’s Catwoman did things to me that would have reverberating effects through the rest of my life! She is, more than any other reason, why i have an unhealthy infatuation for crazy chicks. Also Nancy Downs but The Craft isn’t a Christmas movie. Outside of the way that patent leather catsuit ruined me for normal relationships, Batman Returns is just a force of f*cking nature. It’s Pure Tim Burton and i adore that man’s eye. He is one of my favorite creators and Batman is one of my favorite heroes. How can this thing not make my list? Batman Returns couldn’t take the number two spot, mostly because it jockeys for position with Nightmare pretty actively. I love them both so much, it’s hard to give the number one spot to either of them so, you know, split the difference.

1a. The Nightmare Before Christmas

This is Halloween! I remember being so hype about this movie. Nine year old Smokey was super into this film and that love carries through to this day. Every time it airs, i catch it or, at least, i used to when i had television. I saw this thing day one in theaters, made my mom buy the VHS, it was one of the very first DVDs i ever purchased with my own money, and was the third Blue ray i got after picking up my PS3. The wild thing is, it’s not just me either. Nightmare has become a pinnacle of the cultural zeitgeist. This thing is all over the place. People get tattoos of Jack. Halloween Town even made it into a few Kingdom Hearts games and it wasn’t even a Disney movie at first! It was banished to the subsidiary of Touchstone when it first released because the Mouse House didn’t believe in it! Talk about a miscalculations.

Honorable Mentions: Tokyo Godfathers, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, Bad Santa, Elf, Carol, Anna and the Apocalypse

[sunriserose1023]

Merry & Married {3}

SUMMARY: It’s been almost a year since the most humiliating moment of your life. You’ve done your best to move on—by literally moving across the country, starting a new job, and you’re finally starting to feel settled. That, of course, is when your bubblehead cousin sends you the invitation to her wedding—which is exactly one year to the day that you were left at the altar. You have to go, but you don’t have to go alone. Enter Bucky Barnes, the best friend you’ve ever had. You fill him in, and of course he agrees to go home with you. What are friends for? Never mind the fact that he’s desperately in love with you. And if you hadn’t sworn off men forever, you might just find him … attractive. So there you are, surrounded by love, bridesmaid dresses, champagne, and no less than one hundred sprigs of mistletoe. What could possibly go wrong? WORD COUNT: 1686 WARNINGS FOR THE SERIES: Emotional angst, presumably unrequited love, friends to lovers, fluff, happily ever after, written for the @heamarvel​​ Holiday Movie Challenge

Masterlist

“Fuck, New Orleans is bright.”

You giggled to yourself as Natasha frantically slid her sunglasses on. Beside you, Bucky made a face as he shrugged out of his coat and you nodded. 

“And humid. I don’t even want to think of how my hair’s going to look.”

Natasha shook her head.

“Home sweet home, right, Y/N?”

You nodded, swallowing hard as Bucky laid a hand on your shoulder. You closed your eyes and lifted a hand, gripping his for just a moment before you sighed. Natasha stood beside her suitcase, scrolling through her phone and you turned to look up at Bucky, a soft smile coming over your face when he smirked down at you, sunglasses hiding his blue eyes. 

“What?” “Nat, did you call a car?” “Yep. Should be pulling up any minute now.”

You broke the staring contest you were having with Bucky to smile over at her. 

“Think we can change the travel plans?”

Bucky groaned, shaking his head as he took another bite. You laughed at the powdered sugar in his beard and covering the front of his shirt. Natasha rolled her eyes, sitting back in her chair, arms crossed over her chest. 

“It’s just fried dough.” “No, it’s a delicacy.”

You laughed again, at the words muffled by the bite in Bucky’s mouth. He looked to you, leaning in closer. 

“What’s it called again?” “A beignet.”

Natasha blew out a breath. 

“Yes, we are the quintessential New Orleans tourists, having beignets at Cafe Du Monde.”

Bucky narrowed his eyes at Natasha. 

“Don’t be such a Grinch, Romanoff.”

You laughed as her green eyes narrowed, and you shook your head, sliding the plate away before Bucky was wearing more powdered sugar than he already was. You nodded to him. 

“Have you dunked it in the coffee yet?”

He nodded. 

“Thank God your cousin’s wedding isn’t here. I’d gain—“ “Diabetes.”

You laughed at Natasha’s knowing comment, as she picked up her coffee cup and took a sip. Bucky shook his head, taking another bite, passing the rest of the pastry towards you. You smiled and picked it up, dipping it in the pile of powdered sugar on the plate before taking a bite. You giggled when powdered sugar went all over your face and shirt, but you made no move to wipe it away when you saw the grin on Bucky’s face. He nodded to Natasha. 

“Take our picture.” “Oh, Buck—“ “You’re gorgeous, hush.”

You felt your cheeks warm as Natasha smiled, lifting her phone and snapping a pic of you and Bucky, powdered sugar all over your faces and clothes, lips curled in cheesy grins. 

The town you grew up in was about a three-hour drive from New Orleans. Natasha had ordered a car to take the three of you to the lake house, and you stared out the window as you drove over the long bridge out of New Orleans. Bucky sat across from you, Natasha beside you, both of them watching you. Natasha widened her eyes at Bucky and he gave a nod before he leaned forward. 

“Hey.”

You turned to face him and he smiled at you. 

“Tell me about the fam.”

Natasha gave a quiet laugh. 

“There’s a can of worms you don’t know you’re not ready to open.”

You smiled at her. 

“It’s too late. He’s already on the way to them.”

Natasha sighed, shaking her head. You smiled as you looked back to Bucky. 

“Well, the first person I’ll seek out is my mom.” “Don’t worry; you’ll love her. You’ve already met her, because she’s Y/N, just older.”

You rolled your eyes as Natasha smiled, then nodded. 

“Then we’ll have to find Nana.”

You looked to Bucky and grinned. 

“You’ll love Nana.”

Natasha vehemently nodded, leaning forward. 

“She’s as tall as I am—“ “Which isn’t saying much.”

You dodged the elbow Natasha tried to hit you with and you giggled. She rolled her eyes, then continued. 

“She’s also the one who taught me to take no shit.”

Bucky pursed his lips as he nodded. 

“Oh, good. A pre-Natasha Natasha.”

You nodded your head. 

“Everyone says Nat acts just like Nana did back in the day. But Nana can still hold her own.”

Bucky nodded and Natasha fluffed her hair as she spoke. 

“Nana and Papa had five daughters. Hence the reason our family is so big. I’ll take some, then Y/N can take over. First there’s Aunt Janet and Uncle Hank. They have Hope, who’s married to Scott Lang. Scott has a daughter named Cassie from a previous marriage, and Hope’s pregnant right now. They also have Carol.”

Bucky nodded. 

“Is she married?”

You and Natasha exchanged a glance. You shook your head as Natasha spoke out loud. 

“No, she’s a lesbian.”

Bucky flicked his eyes to you, and you lifted a shoulder and an eyebrow at the same time, almost like you were daring him to say something. He smiled back at you and you rolled your eyes, smiling as you looked to Natasha. 

“Do you think she’s bringing a plus one?” “Uh, it’s Carol. I’ll almost guarantee it.”

You looked back to Bucky. 

“Carol’s a bit of a … how can I put this politely?”

Natasha snorted. 

“Carol’s a hoe.”

Bucky barked out a laugh and you shook your head. 

“I love her to death, but she’s had more girlfriends than any sane person should have.” “She’s very intelligent, but has the worst taste in women.”

You nodded at Natasha, making a face. 

“Remember Sharon?”

Natasha groaned. 

“She was the human equivalent of watching paint dry. But she was better than Jessica.”

You widened your eyes and nodded your head. 

“Jessica was batshit insane.” “Bobbi was normal.” “Now, I liked Bobbi.” “But ever since …”

Natasha let her sentence trail off and you sighed as you looked to Bucky. 

“Carol was in the Air Force. She met Maria and they fell in love. They were in a terrible plane crash and Carol even had amnesia for a while. I thought that was just a plot point for soap operas, but it’s real.” “And it’s awful.”

You nodded. 

“When she finally did get her memories back, we had to tell her that Maria died and it … god, it was horrible.”

Bucky shook his head and you met his eyes again. 

“We love Carol. We’ve been through a lot with her, and we’re kind of protective.”

Bucky smiled and nodded. Natasha let out a breath, then picked her story back up. 

“Then there’s my mom. Good luck with her.”

You giggled. 

“I love Aunt Nadia. She’s such a bad bitch.”

Natasha nodded, and you leaned forward. 

“And Uncle Phil is the greatest.”

Natasha rolled her eyes and you laughed. 

“He’s the polar opposite of Nat and Aunt Nadia, but it just works somehow.”

Natasha shook her head, turning back to Bucky. 

“Then there’s Y/N’s mom. The light of her world and all that.”

You elbowed Natasha before she could dodge it and she laughed as you took over the story. 

“Next is Aunt May, who’s Darcy’s mom. She also has Peter. Uncle Ben had a little brother, Peter’s dad, and when Peter’s parents died, Ben and May adopted Peter.”

Natasha glanced down and you sighed as you looked at your hands in your lap. 

“Uncle Ben died a few years ago. Cancer.” “God, I’m sorry.”

Bucky reached over to take your hand, and you smiled as you laced your fingers through his. You glanced through the window, then back to Bucky. 

“The baby of the family is Aunt Pepper. Her real name’s Virginia, and I honestly have no clue where the nickname Pepper came from.” “Mom said it’s because she was spicy as a kid.” “But Aunt May told me that once Pepper discovered the spice pepper, she ate a ton of it on all her food. And one day Papa said ‘that's enough pepper,’ and I think my mom thought he meant Pepper as a nickname and not the spice. Then they all started calling her Pepper after that.”

You and Natasha shrugged as you exchanged a look, and you turned back to Bucky. 

“Pepper’s married to Tony and they have little Morgan.”

Bucky raised an eyebrow and you smiled. 

“Pepper was sort of an unplanned surprise in the family, so she’s closer to our age than our moms’. Aunt May’s ten years older than her. And Pep and Tony had some issues getting pregnant, but they finally had Morgan.”

Bucky nodded, blowing out a breath. 

“That’s a lot.” “Oh, just wait until they’re all in the same room.”

You nodded at Natasha’s statement and Bucky leaned back in his seat. You smiled, kicking your foot out, your toes barely brushing his leg. He smiled when he looked to you and you smiled at him. Natasha slid over to the window, pulling her phone out and acting interested in it. Bucky leaned forward as you did and you let out a breath. 

“What are you thinking about, pretty girl?”

You sighed. 

“I don’t know. I’m nervous. I haven’t seen most of them since my wedding.” “Well, just from what you told me, it’s clear there’s a lot of love here.”

You nodded. 

“I’m just being stupid.” “You’re not stupid.”

You sighed, lifting your eyes to meet his. He took hold of your hands, giving you a soft smile. 

“If at any time you need a break or an escape or whatever, just look at me. I’ll get you out of there.” “But—“ “No buts. I don’t need to know the story, Y/N. If you need a minute to catch your breath, I’ll sneak you outside. No worries.”

You shook your head, a soft smile on your lips. 

“You’re too good to me, Bucky.”

He shook his head, staring at the top of yours when you glanced down at the hands he was still holding. 

“Well, what are friends for?”

The words tasted vile in his mouth, but the way you looked up and met his eyes, that soft smile on your lips almost made it worth it. 

Almost. 

TAGS: @star-spangled-man-with-a-plan​​, @walkingchemicalfire​​, @eileenalone​​, @mrsalh32611​​, @alexxcorona113​​, @ivoryhazlewood​​, @chaoticfanatic​​, @rhapsody-in-flannel​​, @hidden-behind-the-fourth-wall​​, @captainchrisstan​​, @ninaminaromina​​, @geeksareunique​​, @allsortsofinterests​​, @nerdy-bookworm-1998​​, @misplacedorphan​​, @chrisevansgirl​​, @whimsicalatbest​​, @buckybarneshairpullingkink​​, @isaxhorror​​, @redhairedfeistynerd​, @n3rdybird​, @the-ss-acklestan​, @moonlessnight14​, @geeksareunique​

[caffeinechic]

Good Omens Fic Recs 1/?

I went to fix a link in this post and managed to delete the entire thing like an absolute fool. 

But my complete annoyance with myself won’t be bested with my determination to post this lot. So here I go again. I am so sorry if this has shown on your dash a million times. And sorry for the double links / tagging as I honestly went half mad over even the basics. This is where I am with life.

I have about 300 Good Omens fics bookmarked at this point to trying to pull out my absolute favourites sent me down a re-read (and in many cases a re-re-re-re-read) rabbit hole, which was an absolute joy so no complaints here!

These are just some of the ones that have just really stuck with me for one reason or another so I’ve gathered them up under the cut

4 Authors I just need to do like a HUGE rec for as they’re life ruiners. How dare they be this good. HOW DARE THEY.

@princip1914 @princip1914

Yeah I started pulling out the bookmarks I had for @princip1914 and realised it was...everything they’d written. All of it. Just...all of it.

But my particular favourite out of an outstanding batch is the following - which I have read approximately 70 squillion times. It stuck with me for so long in a way that I don’t think many fics have, ever. I actually can’t recommend this enough:

Doubt Thou The Stars Are Fire

“But how,” Aziraphale gasped, agonized and close to tears. “How can you be sure. Crowley, dear, you got thrown out of heaven for questioning everything. How can you be sure about this?”

Crowley loves and Aziraphale doubts. God intercedes. A groundhog day kind of situation ensues wherein Aziraphale has to fall in love with Crowley over and over again as a human until he gets the point. Highlights include: delivering medical care in rural Louisiana, stargazing in Vegas, strangers on a train, and teaching middle school.

@bestoftheseekwill @bestoftheseekwill

Same “problem” with @bestoftheseekwill - READ EVERYTHING. Oh my god, the human AUs, THE HUMAN AUS.

Special shout out to Acts of Service which was the first Human AU I’d read and got me completely hooked and now whenever seekwill posts I immediately read.

Acts of Service

"You seem very familiar to me. I can’t say why that is." As Aziraphale spoke, Crowley turned away from the fire, and Aziraphale was momentarily concerned that the spell had been broken, that he had crossed some invisible line. But Crowley smiled and brought his beer to his lips.

"Maybe we met in a past life. Does your lot believe in that?"

"Past lives?"

"Yeah."

Aziraphale smiled into his wine. He was sure Crowley was poking fun, ever so slightly, but he liked it. "Not strictly speaking. No."

Crowley shrugged, taking another long sip of his beer. “A mystery then."

After receiving direct instruction from God, village reverend Aziraphale leaves his countryside congregation to serve the underserved and in-need at an urban church in London, a transition made all the more complicated by the mysterious and handsome Crowley, who always seems to appear when Aziraphale least expects him.

OH!! but also

That this could be the kingdom

- this one sat with me for a while. Stunning

I have lived my whole life with a wrecked heart. Fr. Aziraphale Fell’s present mirrors his past, as long ago roommate, classmate, and former friend Anthony Crowley reappears in his life in an unexpected and disarming way, challenging Aziraphale’s choices, and bringing him back to the breaking point, when he made a decision he couldn’t take back. It isn’t temptation, it’s revelation.

@mygalfriday @mygalfriday

Ah here, listen - I went to get my bookmark list for @mygalfriday and just ended up re-reading all 12 fics this week.

i can't say the words, so i wrote you into my verse

Aziraphale blinks as it slowly dawns on him exactly what he’s looking at. Crowley has a tattoo. Well, another one anyway. Unlike the small serpent curled just beneath his temple, this one takes up far more space.

And listen if you don’t read the blind date au series then I don’t know how to help you!

I couldn’t find Rend_Herring  Found @rendherring @rendherring on Tumblr but I had to put my phone and my head down after I read both of these.

The Lightness of You

God should not have built them with such discrepancy, made them need for love, and long for wholeness, then left them to their own devices.

This Soul Outstreaming

“Why did you come here?” Aziraphale interrupts. “Why do you keep doing this?” All the saving, he means, all the chasing after Aziraphale he does. It can’t only be that he’s not keen to endure a replacement. That can’t be it, not anymore. He’s going to get himself in trouble, and then it’ll be Aziraphale’s fault.

Crowley’s mouth shuts with a click. He shifts uncomfortably in his seat, reaches for the handle of the fork and taps his fingertips against it before setting his hands in his lap.

When he speaks, it’s very soft. “Don’t you know?” he asks.

Aziraphale, unaccustomed to his heart refusing to translate why it throbs with such haste, shakes his head.

Fics that, to me, are just stunners. I love them so much.

Slow Show - @mia-ugly @mia-ugly Honestly if you’re seeing a rec list WITHOUT slow show...I’d be legit surprised In which temptations are accomplished, grand romantic gestures are made, and two ineffable co-stars only take four seasons of an award-winning television program to realize they’re on their own side (at last, at last.)

Barriers, and the breaking thereof - @cardinaldaughter @cardinaldaughter Ezra Fell has long been comfortable in his loneliness. He’s content to simply run the Soho Public Library and otherwise keep to himself. However, when a handsome stranger bursts in one evening with a baby, frantic and in need of help, Ezra finds those carefully constructed barriers he’s long maintained begin to crack.

Perhaps it’s time to let them fall.

Anthophilia - @fortinbrasftw @fortinbrasftw Anthony J. Crowley's life seems like it's finally falling into place: his floral shop has begun to gain an undercurrent of appreciation in the design elite of London, and he might have even finally found a boyfriend who looks just right lounging on his Tenreiro sofa. Things seem almost perfect, until one day the empty shop across the street is leased to frumpy fellow Oxford alumni, who doesn't seem to remember Crowley nearly as well as he remembers him, which really shouldn't bother him as much as it does - it was ten years ago after all, and it wasn't even that good of a kiss.

The road to rapture has a lot of pit stops - @emmagrant01 @emmagrant01 Five times they kissed over four thousand years, and one time they actually meant it.

Demon and Angel Professors - Ghostinthehouse - not 100% sure that this is also their tumblr handle so if anyone can confirm that would be great! They're professors. They're married. Their students don't realise. Cue shenanigans.

Multiple short arcs with one-shots (and often pauses) between them. Characters continue from one arc to the next. It's marked as complete, because each short arc is complete in itself, but there will be more arcs and one-shots in the future.

The Grinch Who Sold Christmas - @forineffablereasons @forineffablereasons Anthony J. Crowley, a big-time attorney from London, is sent to small-town Tadfield to close a deal before Christmas that would sell out half of high street to a fancy developer and put him up for partner at his firm. The deal will run the local businesses out and change the landscape of the town forever, but that’s none of Crowley’s business; he’s just doing a job.

But as the town invites him to share in their lives and their hopes and their holiday celebrations, and as the enigmatic Aziraphale invites him to share in something more, Crowley starts to wonder: if everything has its price, is he still willing to pay what this deal will cost?

Slow - write_away It started like this: A boy with the ability to warp reality met an angel and a demon and he made assumptions.

You might say it started like this: An angel and a demon found a marriage contract hung on the wall of the angel's bookshop. They didn't question it.

It also could have started like this: Once upon a time, the angel told the demon he went too fast. The demon took it to heart.

Aziraphale and Crowley find themselves somehow married. Crowley fears going too fast. Aziraphale forges ahead. Neither know how to ask questions of each other.

You, soft and only - @thehoyden He hadn’t expected a sudden lapful of angel.

“Very sorry about this,” Aziraphale said, and kissed him.

A Bushel and a Peck- @thehoyden  Sometimes, a family is a demonic nanny, an angelic cook, and a kid who isn't actually the Antichrist.Or: Crowley helps Aziraphale secure a different position at the Dowling Estate.

Long is the way, and hard - Kate_Lear The first time Crawley meets the angel, the celestial being is twisting its shining white robe in its fingers and looking wretched. It hardly spares him a glance as he shifts from snake to human, and Crawley is a touch put-out. It’s taken some practice to be able to do it so fluidly.

A story of Crowley's thoughts about Aziraphale, from the Beginning to the present day.

And also of temptation, and want, and whether - for a Fallen Angel - redemption is possible after all.

the 21st century, in which they finally work it out - @fieldbears @fieldbears This is light speed in comparison to the last few centuries of their relationship, but Crowley is barely holding on to his patience.

A Few More Rescues - @poetic----nonsense @poetic----nonsense 5+1 Times Crowley Rescued Aziraphale According to the Romantic Tropes of the Era, and One Time Aziraphale Turned It Around on Him (plus Prologue)

The Cottage, the Husbands (series) - Dragonsquill A demon and an angel fall in love and decide to take on the monumental task of living together in a cottage by the sea.

[smokeybrand]

Smokey brand Select: Deck the Halls

I don’t know if you can tell by my blog, but i f*cking love Christmas. It’s my absolute favorite holiday of the year. I love t more than Thanksgiving, more than Halloween, even more than my f*cking birthday and that’s a lot because I'm kind of a f*cking narcissist. I love the festivities, the decorations, the music, the objective purity of the whole season. Christmas time is the one time of year that people decide collectively to suck less. Recently, with all of the stupid conservative boycotts and soapbox rants, that less is a little less than usually but still, it’s hard not to love the Christmas season. It’s so inspirational and has inspired some fantastic films. Here's a list of some of my favorites. A lot of these, the majority of them, probably aren’t “traditional” Christmas fare but i assure you that they are, indeed, Christmas films. To say otherwise would just be disrespectful.

10. Edward Scissorhands

Tim Burton is going to be all over this list, man. Edward Scissorhands came out during a time i was incredibly infatuated with the striking visuals of Burton. I’m an Eighties kid and he kind of had his coming out party during that decade. Almost all of those films he released back then are favorites of mine. I remember seeing Scissorhands as a young kid and being absolutely mesmerized by it’s beauty. As an adult, i appreciated the underlying messaging just as much.

9. A Christmas Story

You’ll shoot your eye out! I used to hate this movie, man. It was a staple in during my elementary school Christmas parties. I never paid attention to it because, as a kid, i hated anything that wasn’t a cartoon. One day i was sick at home and caught it offseason TNT. This thing played, like, every day for some reason. I heard it was a favorite of Ted Turner but that’s just rumor. Anyway, i watched it and completely fell in love with this earnest, absurd, flick. It’s a really good watch and deserves it’s title as a classic.

8. Home Alone

Home Alone was the very first Christmas flick i remembered actually loving for being a Christmas flick. Like, when the season starts and Mariah Carey hits the airwaves, Home Alone is what i thing about. It’s the very first film that i unequivocally associate with Santa season. It’s funny because it’s not that great a film but i still love it dearly. I think that’s more because of nostalgia, though. There are fr superior films in the honorable mentions which probably deserve this spot more but Home Alone makes me genuinely smile.

7. Die Hard

I mean, how can i not put this on the list? It’s a classic. One of the best action films ever made. One of the best performances Bruce Willis has ever given. Plus, it introduces the late, great, Alan Rickman as Hans Gruber. Now, my favorite of the lot is With a Vengeance but Die Hard would be nothing without this holly jolly first entry.

6. Scrooged

One of my favorite Christmas narratives is A Christmas Carol. Dickens was a prolific writer and, among his works, the story of Ebeneezer Scrooge’s crisis of conscious is my favorite. I almost always love it when ever it makes it to screen but, for my money, the best version of this story took the form of the Eighties classic, Scrooged. It’s so Eighties in all of the ways. I love the overall narrative, the changes made t fit it into a then modern setting, and those incredible practical effects. It’s a feast for the senses while hitting all the necessary Dickens notes. Also, this version of the Ghost of Christmas Future is a whole ass nightmare. Like, f*ck, dude!

5. Trading Places

I love this movie so much, just on it’s own merits as a film. It’s so good. Eddie Murphy is excellent in this film and Dan Akroyd is just as brilliant. Jamie Lee Curtis was incredibly hilarious, too. This was the second thing i had ever seen her in, after Halloween so, you know, going from that to this really caught my attention. Trading Places is a classic and should be seen by everyone.

4. Gremlins

Gremlins is just generally one of my favorite films. I love this f*cked up movie, man. It’s SO good and this version is the tone down one. The original vision for this movie was just an R rated murder fest. I mean, the one we got wasn’t a joke wither It’s the reason we have the PG-3 rating. SH*t is just that violent Now, juxtapose all of this little green monstrosity anarchy against a dreamy white Christmas and you have all the makings of worming your way into my heart. Honestly, i prefer the gremlin shenanigans from the sequel, Mohawk is my favorite, but Stripe definitely left an impression.

3. The Long Kiss Goodnight

I had a massive crush on Geena Davis when  was young. Can’t tell you why, but i was absolutely infatuated with the chick after i saw her in The Fly remake. I followed her career afterwards. She dropped several gems along the way, Beetlejuice, Thelma and Louise, Earth Girls are Easy, A League of their Own, but my absolute favorite film of hers is definitely The Long Kiss Goodnight. This thing is peak Nineties action excess. Shane Black in his prime. Die Hard III but John McCLane is a hot ass amazon woman who can beat you to death with her mitts. It even has Sam Jackson as a smart-mouthed side kick! I love it!

2c. A Charlie Brown Christmas

I adore Charlie Brown. If Spider-Man, Godzilla, and Transformers are the foundations of my childhood, Snoopy is foundation adjacent. My Paternal grandma had all of the Peanuts films and i would watch them on repeat when we were forced to go over there. I say forced because she was kind of terrible and none of us really wanted to visit her ever but, when we did, and she wasn’t trying to exploit our labor or feed us rotten food, we did get to watch dope classic sh*t. She owned every Disney movie from the Renaissance and every Peanuts special on VHS. I hated visiting that woman but i loved those Charlie Brown adventures so kind of bittersweet memories.

2b. How the Grinch Stole Christmas

This one is associated with my other grandma, the one i actually liked. We used to sit down every year and watch this one together while sipping egg nog. Man, it’s hard for me to type this out. It breaks my heart remembering those times so I'm going to stop. I just really love How The Grinch Stole Christmas. It’s very, very, special to me.

2a. The Nutcracker

The Nutcracker is in the same situation as How the Grinch Stole Christmas. I have a lot of love for this thing, in ll forms, but the one i remember so vividly is the opera they used to show every season. My grandma really loved opera and orchestral music. I miss her.

1b. Batman Returns

I told you Burton was going to be all over this thing. Bro, how can this thing not be on the top of this list? Batman Returns left a real impression, man. Michelle Pfiefer’s Catwoman did things to me that would have reverberating effects through the rest of my life! She is, more than any other reason, why i have an unhealthy infatuation for crazy chicks. Also Nancy Downs but The Craft isn’t a Christmas movie. Outside of the way that patent leather catsuit ruined me for normal relationships, Batman Returns is just a force of f*cking nature. It’s Pure Tim Burton and i adore that man’s eye. He is one of my favorite creators and Batman is one of my favorite heroes. How can this thing not make my list? Batman Returns couldn’t take the number two spot, mostly because it jockeys for position with Nightmare pretty actively. I love them both so much, it’s hard to give the number one spot to either of them so, you know, split the difference.

1a. The Nightmare Before Christmas

This is Halloween! I remember being so hype about this movie. Nine year old Smokey was super into this film and that love carries through to this day. Every time it airs, i catch it or, at least, i used to when i had television. I saw this thing day one in theaters, made my mom buy the VHS, it was one of the very first DVDs i ever purchased with my own money, and was the third Blue ray i got after picking up my PS3. The wild thing is, it’s not just me either. Nightmare has become a pinnacle of the cultural zeitgeist. This thing is all over the place. People get tattoos of Jack. Halloween Town even made it into a few Kingdom Hearts games and it wasn’t even a Disney movie at first! It was banished to the subsidiary of Touchstone when it first released because the Mouse House didn’t believe in it! Talk about a miscalculations.

Honorable Mentions: Tokyo Godfathers, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, Bad Santa, Elf, Carol, Anna and the Apocalypse

[app-jelly]

Christmas Aesthetic

Hello everyone! I’m finally back with another installment of my domestic AU. It’s March, but fuck it. As always this one is dedicated to all my bot followers.

It was a week before Christmas. The Amari household was decked out with reindeer and Santas and elves. Christmas trees filled every corner that could fit one and, in every doorway, hung a mistletoe. Outside, snow and even more reindeer, Santas, and elves blanketed the lawn. Christmas lights hung from every available surface. It was a bit much, but that was how the Amaris enjoyed their decorations.

Christmas was one of their favorite holidays, the only catch being that neither Fareeha nor Angela celebrated it. They were into it for the aesthetic and consumerism. Fareeha also really liked Santa.

She woke up that morning excited for the day’s plans. Every year since they first got together, Fareeha and Angela would drive to all the nearby malls and Christmas events in their area and get a picture with every Santa they came across. They’d make one giant collage with the pictures and send copies to their friends as gifts.

“Angela, are you up yet?” Fareeha whispered to the still form of her wife nuzzled comfortably into the mountain of pillows and blankets she accumulated every night.

No response.

She nudged her and spoke louder when she said, “Angela, I love you. Please get up.”

Angela finally cracked open one of her eyelids. Her sight was bleary from sleep, but she could make out the form of her excited wife just fine. “Good morning,” she mumbled out, closing her eye as soon as she said it. She rolled over and pulled her nest of blankets closer to herself, hoping to manage at least five more minutes of sleep.

The blankets were pulled from her body, revealing her naked form to the cold morning air. Angela shrieked from the icy assault against her body. She was definitely awake now. “Okay, okay. I’m getting up.” She sat up against the headboard, yawning as she rubbed the sleep from her eyes. “Today’s pictures with Santa, right?”

“Yup,” Fareeha said. She tossed her wife a pair of thermal pajamas. The top matched the bottoms exactly. “I got us these pajamas to take pictures in. And I was thinking that maybe we could mix things up this year.” She put on her own pair that looked exactly like Angela’s. They had nonsensical stripes and snowflakes interspersed with Santas.

“Oh, what would you like to do differently this year?”

Fareeha pulled out yet another pair of identical pajamas, this one smaller than either of their pairs. “Let’s invite Hana. Her parents are hardly ever home so I thought it’d be nice if we took her out today.”

“Fareeha, that’s a wonderful idea.” Angela kissed her wife, laughing when she pulled back and saw her nose crinkled.

“Angela, I love kissing you, but, please go brush your teeth.”

Angela swooped in for another quick kiss before heading for the bathroom. “Why don’t you invite Hana over for breakfast as well?”

Might as well, Fareeha thought. She put on a coat and Santa hat as she made her way downstairs and out the door.

Fareeha walked through the knee-deep snow until she arrived at her neighbor’s front door. She could have used the sidewalk, but she loved messing up the snow.

“Hana!” Fareeha said as she rang the doorbell five times in a row. The door also suffered a series of harsh knocks to make sure that a certain teen would answer.

A loud thump could be heard from inside followed by the sound of slippers dragging across the floor. The door jerked open a crack revealing the sleep-deprived face of Hana Song. She shot Fareeha a glare before slamming the door closed and undoing the chain. She opened it fully, clutching at the blankets she had wrapped around herself when she felt the morning chill.

“You’re lucky I fell asleep on the couch. I literally couldn’t ignore you if I tried. What do you want?” Hana said.

Fareeha shoved the pair of thermal pajamas she brought with her into Hana’s arms. “Here, put this on. When you’re done, come on over. We’re making breakfast next door.”

Hana pulled out her phone to check the time. The display flashed an eight followed by two zeros. Eight AM, the time of day she was never awake unless she stayed up from the previous day. It was uncouth to be awake at such a time. People lacked morals, respect, common decency to be awake this early. Truly, the world possessed no good reason to –

BLARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGG

Ah, yes, hunger. It would be hard to go back to sleep on an empty stomach.

“Fine. I’ll be there in ten minutes.” Hana slammed the door closed and hurried upstairs to change.

Fareeha returned home to the sight of her wife preparing pancakes on the griddle. She watched as Angela sprinkled cut slices of fruit onto the bubbling batter before flipping them over. The pancakes cooked for another minute before they were piled onto three separate plates.

“I didn’t know you could cook,” Fareeha said once the griddle was off.

Angela frowned and smacked Fareeha’s arm with an oven mitt. “Oh, hush. I was a microwave connoisseur before I met you. Pancakes are a real improvement.”

Fareeha put her hands up in surrender before grabbing the syrup and powdered sugar, bringing them to the table.

As soon as they sat down, the front door slammed open. Hana quickly stepped through, closing the door with her foot. Her nose followed the scent of fresh pancakes until she was sitting at the table with Fareeha and Angela.

“Good morning, Hana,” Angela said.

“…ornin’,” Hana managed to croak out, her eyes drooping from lack of sleep. She stared at the pile of pancakes in front of her. Their fluffiness was an admirable trait, along with their golden brown hue. They would make a great pillow to rest her head on.

Fareeha looked on at the imminent collision with wide eyes. “Hana,” Fareeha said, jarring the teen out of her sleep haze. “Would you like something to drink? Tea? Coffee? Maybe a soda?”

Hana drowned her pancakes in syrup as she thought about her options. “Could I have a hot cocoa with a shot of espresso?”

The couple raised their eyebrows at her request. “We have instant hot chocolate mix and some leftover coffee from earlier,” Angela said.

Hana dumped a quarter of the powdered sugar onto her plate. She cut into her pancakes and stuffed them into her mouth, smiling at the perfect combination of flavors. “Hmm. I’ll just have a water then,” she said after a long bout of chewing.

Fareeha grabbed a water bottle from the fridge for Hana, who gratefully accepted it. She needed to wash down her food practically after every bite.

“Are you busy today, Hana?” Fareeha asked once everyone had finished their food.

Hana shook her head. “No, I was just going to go back to bed and then wake up fifteen hours later wondering where the day went.”

Angela looked concerned. Fareeha just smiled. “Great, why don’t you come with us to take pictures with Santa instead?”

Hana got up from her chair and pushed it back under the table. She avoided all eye contact when she said, “Thanks for the invite, but I’m going to pass. I don’t celebrate Christmas.”

Fareeha shrugged. “Neither do we.”

Hana looked at the couple suspiciously before turning her attention to the rest of the house absolutely drenched in Christmas decorations. “Your house looks like the North Pole and you win best decorated house every year.”

Angela and Fareeha both shrugged this time. “What can we say? We love soaking up the attention and it’s nice to win a three-night stay at a fancy resort every year for participating in a holiday we don’t even celebrate.”

Hana relented and took out her phone. “Fine, just let me tell my parents that I’ll be gone… How long are we going to be gone?”

“All day,” Fareeha replies.

Hana sighed as she sent the message to her parents. “When do we leave?”

She found herself buckled in the backseat of the Amari’s car soon after.

The first mall they stopped at was the local megamall. Shoppers packed the building and they had to walk fifteen minutes just to reach the first Santa of the day. Since it was so early, Santa’s Little Village had no line. The trio walked right up to Santa and posed for their first picture. Fareeha and Angela shared matching wide smiles. Hana had her arms crossed and her lips set in a frown.

For the next few Santas, the Amari’s brought props to wear. They took pictures with Santa hats, reindeer antlers, clown noses, and even Santa beards. Hana eventually lightened up, taking a more active role in their Santa hunt. For the last picture, she convinced the Amari’s that it would be fun to stage a presents heist. Of course, they didn’t let the workers know that’s what they were doing.

“Santa hasn’t caught on yet, so we should be good for a few more minutes,” Hana said.

They were hunched by the giant Christmas tree in their last mall shoving all the fake presents into huge red sacks. Grinch fingers adorned their hands.

Hana rounded the tree when all the presents were snatched to make sure there were no stragglers. “Here,” she said, handing her phone to a random shopper that was paid thirty bucks to help them. “Take pictures of us running away from Santa and security. Meet us at the west exit when we get kicked out.”

The Grinch trio hoisted their spoils over their shoulders and yelled to get Santa’s attention.

“Hey, big guy!” Hana shouted.

The mall Santa turned around to acknowledge them.

“We’ve got your presents!” Fareeha shouted next.

“And we’ll be making off with them now!” Angela finished.

The three Grinches laughed together as a surprisingly fit Santa chased after them with security in tow. The photos from their stunt were an instant favorite.

“I had a great time today,” Hana said once they arrived home. “Thanks for the invite.”

She gave the Amari’s a big hug before going back home. The couple watched her go, to make sure she made it back safely. Aside from tripping into a sizable snow pile, Hana made it back without incident.

Angela and Fareeha retreated back to their study, eager to start their collage. They dropped their photos from the day into an editing program. They smiled at Hana’s progression from grumpy to full bright smiles.

“I have to say, this year’s pictures with Santa are my favorite,” Angela said.

“Yeah, mine too.”