#and that is what dorothy sayers gave to me with this ship

[vinca-majors]

adore | lady mary wimsey x charles parker

The first thing she notices is that he radiates calm, as though he is the eye of the storm and no matter how winds rage and debris flies, the chaos cannot touch him. The second thing she notices, though it will be some time before she realizes she knows it, is that his eyes are brown. If Mary cared anything for kindness she might have taken a closer look at him, but she has no time for the romance of kindness, and her starving, brittle, betrayed heart rejects it outright. Kindness never killed a dragon. She is fighting for their lives. Lady Mary Wimsey falls in love with her life, her family, and Detective-Inspector Charles Parker.

[clarasghosts]

Tag Game!

9 people to get to know better

tagged by @merrinpippy thanks!!

3 ships you like: my most bookmarked on ao3 are now apparently whouffaldi, tomarrymort, and hartwin (that last one has claimed more of my brain than i realized)

first ship ever: either piper x leo (charmed) or sam x jack (stargate sg1), but sam x jack was the first i ever read fic for (i was eleven)

last song you heard: supercut by lorde

favourite childhood book: with complete honesty, harry potter was what got me interested in reading when i was a kid; a non-hp answer would be alice in wonderland

currently reading: hangman's holiday by dorothy l. sayers

currently watching: every single thing in colin firth's filmography. i've made it through 54, so far

currently consuming: about to cook some tofu and rice

currently craving: nothing at the moment, since i finally gave into the craving i've had all week for a iced chai latte this morning

tagging: i've let this post sit for a week because i kept making myself anxious over tagging people for whatever ridiculous reason. so i'm tagging anyone who follows me that wants to do it. if you're reading this and you want to answer these questions, then consider yourself tagged. please tag me so i can read your answers!

[indieninja92]

i was tagged by the frankly effervescent @fremulon in this fic ask game and gods know i love an ask game xD

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 16

2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 274,221

3. How many fandoms have you written for and what are they? Just three - Good Omens, Lord Peter Wimsey, and that one sad lingering very likely abandoned Dragon Age Inquisition pwp wip lol

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

The Grindr Logo Doesn’t Even Have A G In It

In The Pocket Of The Universe

You Can Cut My Hair But You’ll Never Cut My Comedically Long Fanfic Titles

Hozier Missed A Trick When He Called It ‘Real People’ Instead Of ‘Joe Bloggs Snogs’

Sure Hope This Doesn’t Awaken Anything In Me

5. Do you respond to comments, why or why not? pretty consistently yes, the ones i dont reply to are usually if someone has left “omg love this!” on every chapter, in which case i usually just reply to the last one, or occasionally if someone has said something uhhh how do i put this, incredibly fucking stupid lol

6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending? um???? i suppose in the pocket of the universe originally had an angsty ending when it was just the first chapter, but then i went back and gave it a fluffy ending instead xD i suppose Valentine's Day Is Kind Of A Scam But I Do Love Getting Presents ends with the implication that crowley spent money on a harry potter book, which is pretty revolting

7. Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written? no, but not in a strict ‘i dont write this’ way, just ive never had an idea good enough or that i was excited enough to bother with

8. Have you ever received hate on a fic? no, ive never got any hate on the internet and honestly i feel like im doing something wrong. feel v left out tbh. my kingdom for some anon hate :(

9. Do you write smut? If so what kind? you betcha. ‘what kind’ um idk the kind where handsome boys touch each other’s peens lol idk i suppose cosy bondage comes up a lot?? is that a thing??

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen? no lol imagine

11. Have you ever had a fic translated? no, alas! i dont think my puns work so well in other languages haha

12. Have you ever co-written a fic before? no but god imagine if me and @mortifyingideal joined forces IMAGINE mort answer my texts im begging you

13. What’s your all time favorite ship? ten/rose <3 shipped it before i knew what shipping was haha

14. What’s a WIP you want to finish but don’t think you ever will? ill finish the ones i want to finish, i dont think ill finish the DAI one but im alright with that, otherwise the only wip i have atm is God May Not Play Games But These Two Goobers Do and im damn well going to finish that! eventually! 

15. What are your writing strengths? im wile funny and i can write cosy bicker flirting like u wldnt believe

16. What are your writing weaknesses? i have none <3

17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? polari counts, right? otherwise yeah why not

18. What was the first fandom you wrote for? dragon age inquisition

19. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written? im on a wimsey kick atm and am very proud of This Space Reserved For A Title As Long And Idiotic As Lord Peter Wimsey’s Nose, not least bc ive got some lovely comments on it from ppl who havent even read lpw and still enjoyed it! also every time someone says the style reminds them of dorothy l sayers, a part of me ascends to heaven

i am tagging @summerofspock, @amuseoffyre, @themoonmothwrites, @ashfae and @brightwanderer but no pressure and if anyone else sees this and wants a go, consider yourself tagged!

[someitems]

Dear Yuletide Author

Happy Yuletide! Thanks for writing for me! 

Please avoid: PWPs (explicit sex is fine if it’s part of a larger plot but I’d prefer a story that’s less explicit and not super sex-focused), unhappy endings, and BDSM/hardcore kink. If a character is injured, hospitalized or suffers a medical emergency in the fic, please warn/tag for it even if it’s a minor character and even if spoils the plot. 

Things I like: Characterization, characterization, characterization. What makes these people tick? Why do they like each other so much? I love both romance and friendship. For fandoms with casts of supporting characters, I like stories that explore characters’ relationships to the supporting characters as well as each other. I’m all about “opposites attract.” Most of all, I love stories that remind us why we love that world/people so much.

My requests:

Aggressive Retsuko | Aggretsuko

Gori, Retsuko

In season 2, Retsuko is panicking about her romantic life and frustrated and annoyed with the men she meets. Gori is feeling left out that Retsuko is focusing on meeting guys rather than spending time with her and Washimi. This can only mean one thing.......Gori wants to date Retsuko, and Retsuko should give it a try. 

However you want to get them together is up to you, whether it’s a fumbling process or an immediate realization. But make it as fun and goofy as the show itself!

The Great British Bake Off RPF 

Noel Fielding, Rahul Mandal

Noel and Rahul’s weird goofy energy together was a particular delight to me and I grew to ship them very much. I’d love a fic where they’re together - preferably one where they get together - and throwing off those fond sparks that they gave off on the show. Maybe it’s set during Rahul’s season, maybe set after his win - it’s up to you. I just want them to fall for each other!

Lord Peter Wimsey - Dorothy Sayers 

Harriet Vane, Peter Wimsey, Mervyn Bunter

Harriet and Peter are one of my favorite couples in the whole of literature. However, it can’t be denied that Bunter and Peter’s relationship is, like most butler/master relationships in literature, extremely homoerotic. How do Harriet, Peter and Bunter navigate the changes in their relationships to each other once Harriet and Peter are married? I’d love a fic exploring what that looks like and finding a happy medium where all three of them can love and help each other...whatever that looks like. (Bonus points if you throw a mystery in.)

[bughead-fic-request]

I would like to thank @leaalda for making these amazing banners.

This is an effort to spread the word about all fan fiction writers in our little fandom. If you would like to be featured or nominate a writer, please contact me. Please reblog this post if you can and check out some of @ficmuse work!

1. First things first, if someone wanted to read your stories where can they find them.

I post all of my work on AO3

2. Tell us a little about yourself.

I’ve been a writer and a poet since childhood. Professionally, I’ve worked for a major Internet service provider, been an executive secretary, made collections calls and even sold windows door to door. I just completed an art history Capstone in Roman and Greek art and am contemplating graduate school. I’m also a mom and a wife. I’ve worn a whole lot of hats in my life.

3. What do you never leave home without?

Something to read. I carry my Kindle in my purse. I read a lot of romance, mystery, and historical fiction.

4. Are you an early bird or a night owl?

Depends. If I’m really immersed in something I’m writing, I’ll pound the keys until 2 am or later. Ideally, I’m in bed by eleven.

5. If you could live in any fictional world which one would you choose and why?

Westeros! Ice zombies? Dragons? Bring it on.

6. Who is the most famous person you’ve ever met.

I’m a fangirl with a travel budget, so I’ve met some actors from my various fandoms, including James Marsters from Buffy and William Shatner and Leonard Nimoy from Star Trek. I like attending conventions. I’ve met Charlaine Harris, one of my favorite authors. That was a big thrill, too.

7. What are some of your favorite movies/TV?

TV: X-Files; Buffy the Vampire Slayer; Friends. Movies: While You Were Sleeping; Fifth Elements; Pride and Prejudice (2005).

8. What are some of your favorite bands/musicians?

Music is a really important element of my life. I need music while writing, cooking, driving, you name it. My all time favorite bands include Coldplay, Depeche Mode, Garbage, and Muse. Musicians? Jeff Buckley, Leonard Cohen, Tori Amos, Sarah McLachlan.

9. Favorite Books?

Jane Austen; I waffle between Pride and Prejudice and Persuasion. Charlaine Harris’ Southern Vampire Mysteries. Dorothy Dunnett’s Lymond Chronicles. Dorothy Sayer’s Lord Peter Wimsey mysteries.

10. Favorite Food?

Any configuration of a potato. Baked; fried; mashed. I’m a potato fan.

11. Biggest pet peeve?

Passive aggressive people. Just tell me what I’ve done to piss you off and I’ll try to make it right. If you can’t do that, we’re at an impasse.

12. What did you want to be when you were little? What do you want to be now?

I’ve always wanted to be a published author and that’s still my dream.

13. What are your biggest fears? Do you have any strange fears?

Oh, boy. I have a phobia about driving on the highway. It’s very weird. I’ve gone way the hell out of my way to take side roads instead of highways.

14. When you are on your deathbed what would be the one you’d regret not doing?

When I was fifteen, I had the choice to go to boarding school in England. At the last minute, I backed out and went to a school in Pennsylvania instead. I really regret that; my whole life would have been on a different path.

Okay… lets talk about your writing!

15. Which is your favorite of the fics you've written for the Bughead fandom?

I’ve only written a few, but the BLT universe (Bizarre Love Triangle, Long Live Rock) is my baby. That’s my blood, sweat and tears, right there.

16. Which was the hardest to write, in terms of plot?

Fugue. The idea of Jughead as a murderer was so preposterous, I had to figure out a way to make it real and believable.

17. How do you come up with the ideas for you fic(s)? Do you people watch? Listen to music? Get inspired by TV/movies?

I get inspired by music more than anything else. Usually, finding the right song is the key to unlocking a story for me. But it can be other things. I eavesdrop like crazy and I also am very moved by neon signs and photography. I often look at moodboards and listen to a fic specific soundtrack while I’m writing.

18. Idea that you always wanted to write but could never make work?

I’ve been writing a fic with Betty as the POV character. The plot is inspired by the movie Groundhog Day. She keeps repeating the same night over and over. It’s funny on film, but I think it’s too repetitive as a story. I haven’t given up on it yet, but it is really kicking my butt.

19. Least favorite plot point/chapter/moment you’ve written?

Archie and Betty hooking up in Long Live Rock was just such a bummer.

20. Favorite plot point/chapter/moment you’ve written?

Jughead’s backstory about how he got his beanie in Bizarre Love Triangle.

21.Favorite character to write?

Jughead, for sure.

22. Favorite line or lines of dialogue that you've written?

For Long Live Rock, I had to write a lot of song lyrics. I’m particularly fond of some I wrote for Jughead: Fortunes have been made and fortunes have been lost /Princes earning money by moving rocks Princesses waiting tables in a neon glow/What we had we'll find again and never let it go.

23. Best comment/review you’ve ever received?

I really love it when people just get so flipped out that they can’t even articulate their feelings and it’s a lot of capital letters and exclamation marks.

24. How do you handle bad reviews or comments?

Unfortunately, I have a thin skin. I can handle the occasional nasty comment, but when it’s message after message of people hating what you do, it’s demoralizing.  My husband has repeatedly suggested not reading the comments on Ao3, but I feel an obligation to respond to each reader unless they are being a complete and utter asshat. The hate mail I received on Tumblr for parts of Long Live Rock was just unbelievable. That stuff, I just delete and try to ignore. That being said, constructive criticism is great. But that’s rare and far between. I get a lot of “this is great” or “I hate this with the fire of a thousand suns” and not much in the middle.

25. If you could change anything in any of your stories, what would it be?

The inevitable typos that I can only notice after I post them. Each one causes me physical pain.

26. What is your favorite story you’ve ever written? Any fandom?

My first real labor of love was a story called The Countess which was based on the BBC TV show of Robin Hood. I had a massive fangirl crush on the bad guy, Sir Guy of Gisborne. I shipped him with Maid Marian and despite the fact that she DIED, I still wanted a happy ending for my OTP. Did I mention that he killed her? Because that was the canon ending of that ship! So, I literally resurrected her, made the hero of the canon story the villain, and gave the full monty love story and a happy ending to Marian and Guy. It made my heart happy. It still does, because that canon just pissed me off to no end. One of the great joys of fan fiction is the ability to tell canon to go screw itself.

27. What are you reading right now? Both fan fiction and general fiction?

I haven’t read much Bughead fic because it lessens my ability to get into the headspace of my own AU. However, I am fortunate to have a plethora of fic recommendations from my dear @jandjsalmon waiting for me. As for fiction, I am currently reading a historical mystery called Instruments of Darkness by Imogen Robertson.

28. Do you have an advice for writers that want to get into this fandom but might be scared?

Don’t be afraid that your work isn’t good enough. Your work is always better than you think it is! You are your own worst critic. Trust that there is an audience for every story. We are a very welcoming community and you are guaranteed to find someone who will appreciate the work of your imagination.

[villa-kulla]

I was hoping you might find time for the commentary! I expect this may be a common request, but would you do the scene at the end of Chisolm's 7, from '6 months later' to 'gradually remembered how to be himself'?

I had a feeling you’d choose that one haha and I’m so glad you did! It was exTREMEly satisfying to write. Thanks for the ask!

(***copy-paste disclaimer that this is NOT under a readmore because my blog’s black background makes reading long things a chore, so SCROLL FAST IF YOU’RE NOT INTERESTED!***)

                                                        *

Before this section even starts, for the 6 months later heading I intentionally left such ridiculously huge paragraph gaps before and after, just because I knew people would be scrolling and I wanted to convey distance for the time jump. If this had been a book I’d have wanted an almost blank page that says ‘6 months later’, so I guess wide gaps in between scrolling is the online version of that haha)

Goodnight stretched back on the lounge chair contentedly, baking underneath the hot sun. Billy would give him hell for having taken off his thin linen shirt in the middle of the day, but Billy was out swimming as it happened, and what he didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him.

Goody and I are one where the sun is concerned, in that we KNOW we burn easily but the allure of sunbathing properly is too much to resist haha, much to the despair of the ones who are trying to save us from ourselves/UV rays. This is absoLUTEly a source of much bickering for them haha

He reached for his drink, moving the colourful umbrella to the side as he took a pull from the straw. He licked his lips, the sweet juice mingling with the salty taste from when he’d gone swimming earlier.

They did that every day. Swimming, that is. Swimming, sailing, and making their way around the islands, no plans for the day other than if they should up the sails and find a new port to explore, or stay anchored, bobbing in crystal blue and green waters next to white beaches, alternating between swimming or laying back on the deck while they enjoyed each other’s company. Whether that was by playing cards, reading, tanning, keeping the large yacht in ship-shape, or having frankly ridiculous amounts of sex, the bliss of living with Billy Rocks still hadn’t worn off. And at this rate, Goodnight didn’t think it ever would.

living the high liiiiife. Back in chapter 1, Sam asks Goody what his plans with the bank money are, and Goody says ‘I see a yacht in my future’, and then BOOM, just like that I had the ending for this fic completely in place haha. Like the second I typed him saying that it was like “oh okay, so this fic ends with Goody and Billy on a yacht together, k cool”, and the whole way through I couldn’t wait to actually write it. And as we talked about before, this Dorothy L. Sayers quote was in my head the entire time writing it: “Lord Peter’s large income… cost me nothing and at the time I was particularly hard up and it gave me pleasure to spend his fortune for him. When I was dissatisfied with my single unfurnished room I took a luxurious flat for him in Piccadilly. When my cheap rug got a hole in it, I ordered him an Aubusson carpet.” Spending fictional money is extremely satisfying haha, so yeah, I was very much looking forward to spoiling these two

Goodnight nudged down his sunglasses, keeping an eye on Billy out in the water, smiling when he saw his dark head bobbing out in the water like a seal’s. They were anchored by a coral reef and Billy was out snorkeling again. Never content to just float on the water though, Goodnight often saw his head dip under to go chase a fish or pick up a shell on the sandy bottom.

I had to include the seal comparison, because as always, Billy is such a water creature to me. I blame River Grit lol, but the seal bit is my little shoutout to my own damn obsession with him as a water spirit. Also protective!Goody nudging down his glasses

Goodnight smiled and took another sip of his drink, making a mental note to ask Billy if he wanted to have dinner on shore or fix something on the boat. They were anchored off one of the many islands in the area, and this one had an appealing night market they’d explored the night before before, walking through the bright lights with cold beers in their hands, listening to the sounds of drums from the street bands, the smell of fish, pineapples, and coconuts thick on the air.

I like the domesticity in the phrasing of ‘fix something’, and how it suggests the kind of dinner routines they might have built up at this point in their little floating home. Can’t you just picture them in the kitchen, hips bumping while they both make supper, and holding things out for each other to taste? My heart

They’d seen what felt like half of the Pacific islands this way: sailing to different areas and exploring the local cities, enjoying the colour of each one. But as fun as their travels had been, Goodnight also enjoyed the time he spent with Billy just staying in on the boat: days spent lounging on the deck while they soaked up the sun, the ocean rippling clear around them; warm evenings of throwing something together in the yacht’s kitchen and eating dinner out on the deck with their feet dangling in the water as they watched the sun set; rainy evenings curled up in the lounge watching old movies on their flat screen while the rain drummed on the roof overhead and made the ocean outside as rippled and dented as a golfball. And then there were the nights spent with the windows thrown open, the hot breeze coming in while they moved together on the sheets, feeling and tasting every inch of each other, the movement of their bodies as steady and uplifting as the roll of waves.

I’ve often felt like this big chunky paragraph could have been more elegantly done, but I wasn’t sure how. But either way it was very satisfying to imagine and write these little scenarios for them. Personally I like the image of them eating on the side of the boat with their feet dangling in the water while the sun goes down best, but I also like the image of a rainy ocean being like a ‘golfball’. I was very keen to get the golfball comparison in there, but again, I feel like I could have done it more elegantly but just didn’t know how lol but ah well

Goodnight and Billy had each chipped in from their shares of the casino job so that they could buy the yacht. It was the closest thing either had had to a steady home in a long time, it had been worth every penny.

so they each made off with about 25 million if I remember correctly? I looked at a lot of yachts for sale while writing this (which was both fun and envy-inducing haha), and honestly a reeeeeally swanky mid-sized yacht could EASILY go for at least 50 million. But also I didn’t want them to spend their WHOLE cut of the take on a yacht, because they need to have millions left over to play around with! So idk, let’s say their yacht is certainly high end but not ostentatiously so, and they afforded it just fine with plenty left over for caviar. And btw, in all my yacht research, this one was probably closest to what I imagined for the exterior, although not exactly: https://www.burgessyachts.com/en/sale-purchase-category/yachts-for-sale/sailing-yachts/khaleesi-00006286.html (I couldn’t find an exACT match for what I had in my head but that one’s close-ish)

And speaking of a million dollar view…

coming up is my version of ‘Ursula Andress ascending from the sea in a white bikini in Dr. No’, only it’s Billy haha

Billy was climbing up the ladder, and god, this was just the best part of Goody’s day. He pulled himself up onto the deck, dripping wet, muscles glistening beneath the hot sun, black swimsuit clinging to his hips. He reached up to take off his snorkelling mask, the plastic strap tangling briefly in his hair which he then squeezed out. It was past his shoulders these days, either by preference or simply not being bothered enough to cut it.

would that not be a sight and a half……writing this paragraph was shameless voyeurism I tell you haha. Oh and also the ‘this was just the best part of Goody’s day’ was a reference to Matt Damon’s line in the movie when we see Julia Roberts coming down the stairs looking lovely and he says ‘This is just the best part of my day.’ Like it says in the fic notes, the plot itself is only LOOSELY based on Ocean’s 11 (in that it’s a team and they rob a casino haha), but there are a number of homages, lines, and references to the movie sprinkled throughout, because I love it so much

Billy bent down to take off his flippers, and Goodnight took the opportunity to quickly throw on his white shirt again, not bothering to button it. Billy would say he was burning up, although truthfully Goodnight had never been more brown in his life. He ran his fingers through his salty hair, mussing it up, knowing Billy found it fetching when his hair, sun-streaked with blonde these days, fell across his eyes.

while I do love canon-Goody’s gross, slicked-down hair as an endearing character trait, this was my chance to actually give him some nice, free hair, and I took it haha.

Billy straightened up and walked towards Goodnight on the lounge chair, clearly finding Goodnight as appealing a picture right now as Goodnight found him.

it’s fair to assume they don’t get a lot done, what with how much they just check each other out all the time

“Nice swim, cher?” Goodnight asked with a smile.

“Saw a lionfish,” Billy said with satisfaction as he picked up Goodnight’s drink and took a sip of it.

went back and forth for aaaages between ‘Billy said with satisfaction’ and ‘Billy said happily’. I really liked the ‘happily’ but felt it was coming off as too childish, especially for Billy’s first lines in this scene. I wasn’t trying to infantilize him with pure unfiltered pleasure at a lion fish, but that’s just how the ‘happily’ seemed to be coming off

“Bravo, darling. What’s that, only two thousand species left to go?” Goodnight asked, referring to the list Billy had taped to the fridge of all the different fish he wanted to see in the wild.

he WOULD have that though. oh I do love you, fishboy

“Something like that,” Billy agreed, handing Goodnight back his glass where he’d been batting at it. “Saw a leopard shark too.”

that ‘batting at it’ was completely meant to suggest lazy cat behaviour in Goody. ‘cause. I don’t know, man. They just make nice cats haha

Goodnight narrowed his eyes. “How big are those ones again?”

Billy warns Goody against messing with the sun, and Goody warns Billy against messing with sharks, it evens out in the end;) Protective bbs

Billy smiled. “They’re harmless, Goody.”

“Well maybe so, but you just remember what I said about chasing off after anything with bigger teeth than you,” Goodnight said warningly.

“You’ll be cross,” Billy said, smile still tugging at his lips.

“I’ll be cross,” Goodnight agreed.

“And you’ll scold me,” Billy murmured, bending down, his lips tickling Goodnight’s.

okay but writing Goody scolding people is just SO FUN FOR SOME REASON? I can see him getting all puffed up and ranting at people, and those who know him well know it’s best to just let him talk himself out. The scene earlier in this chapter of him floridly telling off Sam was extremely delightful to write lol. Goodnight definitely has a well developed sense of righteous indignation. Although any shark-related warnings Billy may have received would certainly have been given with love, they’d be given with fervour too, ‘cause I mean Goody didn’t go to all this trouble just to have Billy eaten by a SHARK

“Darn right,” Goodnight said with finality, leaning in to catch Billy’s lips, salty and cool against his own, and delicious every time.

He felt Billy’s lip turn up against his own, and suddenly Billy was pulling back and wiping a thick glob of cream against Goodnight’s nose.

“You were burning,” Billy said.

don’t know if anyone would have remembered the scene from chapter 6 at this point, but Billy was also warning Goody that he was getting a sunburn, and this is my little echo to that. Trapped or free, Billy is head of the ‘make Goody wear sunblock’ squad

Goodnight made a sound of protest but laughed and rubbed the sunscreen in. Billy kissed the tip of his nose when he was finished, and then hopped back onto the deck to go towel off.

I feel like Goody makes a lot of ‘sounds of protest’ in my fics lol, but sometimes it’s hard not to overuse the same mannerisms for characters. But on an unrelated note, BILLY. KISSING. GOODY’S. NOSE. I still can’t decide if that’s a very unBilly-like thing to do, or a VERY Billy-like thing to do, but either way, the image pleased me so in it stayed

Goodnight felt his heart swell to watch Billy move about the deck, limbs loose, posture relaxed, a world removed from the Billy Rocks he’d met in Vegas. That Billy had watched everything with wary eyes, posture tense, too skinny and his skin pale from so much time inside, suspicious of everyone and everything around him.

Goodnight had still found him the most beautiful man alive back then. But the Billy that had emerged these past six months was nothing short of a wonder. He was tanned and golden, muscles strong and healthy from hours spent swimming and doing work on the boat every day. His quietness from before had made him seem pent-up, almost like it was a defense. But any stretches of silence these days seemed borne of confidence instead, telling Goodnight what he thought of something with an eloquent lift of his eyebrows or a mere quirk to his lips. He was relaxed, cocky, so dry-as-dust funny he made Goodnight’s sides hurt, and so vibrantly self-possessed Goodnight felt he was seeing the real Billy Rocks come out more and more every day, leaving behind the buttoned-up Billy he’d met in Vegas as Billy gradually remembered how to be himself.

Hardest DVD commentary paragraph for last, but Billy was often a challenge to write in this one. I kept trying to write him as the Billy Rocks I’m used to - the one described in this paragraph - but he kept coming out as so wary, wound tight, and extremely vulnerable. But then again, why wouldn’t he be?? If you think about it, his situation is HORRIBLE. I think it’s realistic that he would feel extremely vulnerable and defensive, so that’s the Billy I ended up writing for much of the fic. And I told myself that the Billy we see on the yacht is when we finally see the REAL Billy Rocks….long hair and all:) Although if I can briefly mention the next paragraph, (‘Sometimes Billy would withdraw, and Goodnight knew he was retreating to years of repression and tension and wondering what he could have done differently to have changed his situation, or wondering if there was nothing he could have done at all. Sometimes it was hard to know which was worse.’) I felt it was really important to include that to show he’s not going to get over it just like that, or just because he has a nice house now. Billy would realistically have some ptsd for a long time after spending 10 years trapped and under extreme mental pressure. So it’ll definitely take Billy a while to cope with, but he has a much better footing to do it now, and I imagine given time, he’ll be even more like the Billy Rocks we’re all used to. And I like the last words of “Billy gradually remembered how to be himself”, because I’ve found in my own experience when it comes to getting over a traumatic period, those little flashes where you feel completely normal and like yourself again do feel like ‘remembering’ in a strange way. Like your whole body is remembering or something. So while it will still be a struggle sometimes, the more he remembers, the more like himself he’ll stay.

(P.S. Still not entirely sure if I’d do a sequel or if it’s just an idea to amuse myself with sometimes haha, but I’m sure the Billy Rocks in any ‘Chisolm’s 8′ would be more what we’re used to haha.  And my image of the team meeting up again for the first time would contain a lot of whistles and ‘damn Billy’ and Billy’s just like ‘what??!’ and all alarmed by the attention, much like how he met them for the first time, and Sam’s just amused like “Nothing. You look good, Billy,” and Goody trails in after with him a dreamy smile all like “Doesn’t he though?”. Smitten, styling, criminals ‘till the last haha. And yes, Billy absolutely keeps the hair haha)

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Thanks for the ask!:)