#and the one that's been on my mind all day: the zuko azula and ursa au

[hella1975]

too many zukka wips not enough willpower

[demaparbat-hp]

Hi there. ^_^ ♥ First, LOVE your art!♥

2nd, for your Katara joins Zuko in hunting the Avatar AU idea, I have a question. :)

If originally Zuko was hunting him to restore his honor, but now he's part of the White Lotus, does this make the White lotus evil? (The kind that think they're doing it for good, but they're delusional, because their idea is clearly bad.)

Or, if they're not evil, what is Zuko's new reason for hunting the Avatar, if not for his honor? :)

Hello, and thank you for the question!

I hope you don't mind me making this a sort-of continuation to this post, but the replies are connected, in a way.

Now, it may come as no surprise that I love to play with canon divergences. So it stands to reason that one minor change to canon became the basis for Zuko's character in this AU. Mainly, that he stayed behind with Azula to eavesdrop the rest of Ozai's audience with Fire Lord Azulon, and thus was witness to the latter demanding his death in exchange for Ozai's right to the throne.

Zuko, unable to sleep that night, is wide awake when Ursa comes to see him. He delays her, deeply afraid of what's happening, and follows her silently through the dark halls of the palace when she leaves. But Ozai intercepts her. Ozai kills her, and Zuko watches.

It changes everything and nothing at all at the same time. Zuko's desire to be the Perfect Prince isn't because he wishes for his father's attention and love—instead, it comes from a place of grief. Zuko's is a simmering rage that drives him to one day take the throne (the very same throne that turned his mother to ashes and gave her no ceremony) from Ozai in revenge. But to do so he first needs to be ready for it.

Zuko learns to listen. Slithering through the shadows of the palace and pushing himself beyond his limits. But the Agni Kai happens. And when everything is lost, Zuko turns his misfortune into an advantage.

Uncle had started to introduce him to the White Lotus before his banishment, so Zuko becomes a member after he's fully healed. He makes the best out of what little he has—a crew full of agents, traitors and dissidents, and a position and name in the Fire Nation military that, while precarious in nature of his banishment, still allows him certain sway from within.

Time passes, and he grows. He goes to missions for the White Lotus, puts a stop to several plans for minor invasions and battles (nothing major, as to not cause suspicion) and works hard and subtle to better things wherever he goes.

He makes plans. Reckless, half-impossible plans to depose of his father. But they are useless and, most often than not, bloody.

The conditions of his banishment are clear. He is stripped of all titles and rights as Prince and can never set foot on the Mainland ever again. He's no longer the Crown Prince to the Fire Nation and has, by the Divine Law of Agni, no right to the throne. That is, of course, unless he does the impossible, captures the long-missing Avatar, and brings them to the Fire Lord. And that, for obvious reasons, is not an option. It hasn't been an option for the last one hundred years.

Until it is.

Capturing the Avatar is not something Zuko does to regain his honor or earn his father's respect (the first, because he had never lost it; the second, because he's never had it in the first place). It is a necessity. Something he must do if he wants to reclaim his title as Crown Prince, take the throne from his father and end the war once and for all.

But, let me tell you a secret. This AU? It was born because I woke up one day with a single phrase repeating itself in my head, over and over again:

The Prince refused to play Pai Sho, not because he was bad at it but, rather, out of boredom—he never lost a single game.

And that's just it. It's a game.

He can't take an untrained, childish fifteen year old Avatar to his father. But he can give the kid enough time to get ready. Chase him around, play the Bad Guy, push him away from the real dangers out there. Oh, he will deliver the Avatar to the Fire Lord—he just needs to keep his cover as loyal prince long enough for the boy to play his part and become a fully realized Master.

The Gambit is dangerous and double-edged, but all of Zuko's moves on the board are part of the same strategy. This, after all, is just another game of Pai Sho.

And he never loses.

[the-badger-mole]

The Other Woman: Part 2

Zuko was stunned. In the span of one evening, he'd gone from happily- ecstatically- engaged to the woman of his dreams, to standing alone in his apartment trying to sort out the wreckage of his relationship.

Katara was gone when he finished his talk with his mother. He asked his stepfather and sisters where she'd gone, but Ikem hadn't even noticed she had left. Azula had just rolled her eyes and announced she was about to leave herself. Kiyi, his youngest sister, was the only helpful one there. She had tugged his sleeve and pulled him aside, with her eyes wide in concern.

"Katara left so quickly," she told her brother. "I tried to ask what was wrong, but I don't think she heard me." Zuko frowned at that. His mother's house was away from any major roads, and he had driven them both there. She couldn't have gone far, he thought.

His phone chimed a few moments later. Zuko hurried to unlock his screen to see if Katara had texted him an explanation for her sudden disappearance. It wasn't her texting him, but the ride-share app alerted him that she had just gotten a ride back to the city.

"How rude that woman is," Ursa huffed when she saw Katara was gone. "She could have at least said good night. Zuko, my love, are you sure about her?" Zuko frowned at his phone again. This wasn't like Katara.

He left very shortly after that. Hoping to catch Katara at home when she got out of the car. Ursa had been against it. Giving into Katara's tantrums would set a bad precedence for their marriage, and Ursa hadn't even gotten to serve the dessert she'd spent all day slaving over. But some nameless panic had settled over Zuko. If he didn't go after Katara now, he might not get another chance. Ursa tried to change his mind, pointing out that he'd been drinking (he'd had half a cup of wine) and he should stay the night instead of rushing off after that woman.

He didn't catch Katara as she got home. Zuko got the notification that her ride had reached her destination while he was still ten minutes away from her apartment. Perhaps that should have been a sign to leave her alone, but Zuko couldn't. He double parked his car outside of Katara's apartment building and slipped inside behind a man carrying an armload of grocery bags. The idea of sharing the tiny elevator with the man and possibly being forced to engage in small talk had Zuko walking to the stairs instead. Katara only lived on the fifth floor.

When he reached her door, slightly panting and sweaty, he paused. What was he doing here? He knew Katara well enough to know that she wouldn't appreciate his intrusion right now. She was angry, and he didn't know why, but he knew that when she was angry it was best to give her space. He hesitated. Lifted his hand. He deserved to know why.

It didn't take Katara long to answer the door. It was suspiciously as if she'd been waiting. Her eyes and nose were red, and Zuko realized with a start that she had been crying. His own frustration slipped momentarily and he stepped forward instinctively to comfort, but Katara moved out of reach.

"Why did you leave?" Zuko asked. Katara's eyes flashed angrily.

"I got tired," she spat out.

"Tired?" Zuko blinked in surprise and confusion. "Are you sick?"

"That, too," Katara scoffed. She sniffed and wiped at her eyes. She leaned against the door and Zuko thought she was about to close it on him, but instead she turned her gaze up towards him, and he was struck by the anguish he saw there. "Why do you let her treat me that way?"

Zuko's first thought was to ask what she meant. To deny he had any idea what she was talking about. To pretend he hadn't noticed Ursa being any colder than usual. He was walking a thin line. One false move and any chance of him working this out with Katara was gone. And he did want to work this out. He knew he would never find someone he loved as much as he loved her.

"She doesn't mean anything by it," Zuko said, weakly. It was the wrong thing to say. Katara's entire body seemed to shut off towards him. Her face went stony, and her tearful blue eyes turned cold and icy.

"Doesn't she?" Katara scoffed. "She doesn't really think I'm not good enough for you? That you should be with a woman who wants to be a housewife? That I'm coming between your relationship with her?"

"Katara, you have to understand," Zuko pleaded. "After the divorce...after everything with my father...she just wants to make up for what she missed."

"How long do you expect me to put up with that?" Katara demanded. She straightened up and glared at Zuko. "When she tries to disrupt our wedding day, should I just ignore her? When she insults the way I raise our kids, I should just let it slide? When she insults my weight? My family? My culture?"

Zuko was speechless. His mind scrambled, trying to find a defense for his mother, but all he could do was gape at Katara's expectant face. Finally, she broke the silence. Her face crumpled and fresh tears sprang to her eyes.

"I love you, Zuko," she said, slipping the engagement ring off of her finger. "But I can't compete with your mother for the rest of my life. And I won't stay quiet while she insults me." She pressed the ring into his palm and closed his fingers around it. Then impulsively, she leaned up and kissed his cheek. Before Zuko could gather himself and plead his case, Katara shut the door. A moment later he heard the lock click into place.

He could still enter, if he wanted. He had a key to her apartment, after all. Instead, he turned away numbly, and shuffled to the elevator. He didn't remember driving home, or pulling into his parking spot, or anything of his journey home until he found himself leaning against his door. He couldn't even recall how long he'd been standing there. Finally, Zuko came out of his fog enough to pull the ring out of his pocket and stare at it. She'd actually given it back to him. She'd actually ended things.

Pain sat like a weight in Zuko's chest. He wanted desperately to cry, but all that would come out were sharp, ragged gasps. He didn't want to be alone just then, but he didn't know who to call. His best friend, Sokka, was Katara's brother. If he knew about the break up, then the chances were high that he'd be heading towards his sister's place before he came to see Zuko. For the briefest moment, he considered calling his mother, but the thought of Ursa being happy about the breakup stopped him. That left one more person.

"Jasmine Dragon Tea Shop," Iroh answered cheerfully. "How can I help you?" Zuko froze, breathing heavily into the phone. Iroh spoke again, his voice a mix of confusion and annoyance, "Hello?"

"...Uncle," Zuko managed to get out before the first sob escaped him.

"I'm on my way."

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5

[mugentakeda]

Do you have any fic recs similar to your take on iroh? Treating him as an actual character with some fucked up issues is SO much more fun!! I love him and I am chewing on your art

YES!!!!!!!! everytime i post about shithead iroh moments i get nervous someones gonna think i dont like him or im anti iroh or whatever but i genuinely honest to god think his less than savory past and personality traits ON TOP of the things about him that make him so beloved by the fandom makes him better. like yeah i love all parent characters that are just big softies but big softie parents that also are kinda (very much ) fucked up are even better. to ME. and i dont usually judge how good characters are on the basis of how good of a parent they are which is oddly something that a Lot of people do but. U wont find any of that on this blog which is also why i loveeeee ursa.

BUT I DIGRESS! here is my absolute favorite. its unfinished but what is there is still very loaded. digs in deep to iroh. gets pretty nitty gritty with it too. it changed how i see iroh and specifically season 1 iroh. it balances his b1 behavior with his later revealed status as a grand lotus MASTERFULLY, and puts his manipulative and cunning side on full display. might even make you mad at him a little bit

this one is less of a take on iroh as like. a general and a grand lotus and the war side of him and more of him as a father. its short and sad and i adore all of this authors fics involving iroh. it still shines a good light on the consequences of irohs own actions though because lu ten dying was literally his fault. the selfishness and the manic desperation that bleeds through this monologue is kind of scary but also is tragically beautiful.

ALSO these specific parts near the end of salvage were REALLY good. i feel like iroh is definitely the kind of guy that does a whole lot of backhanded comments as a way of patronizing without probably even realizing he does it?? i think a lot of people forget that what makes iroh being “changed” different from zuko is that zuko is still a child, and iroh is like. in his fifties or something. a whole LIFETIME of probably doing everything zuko did pre-redemption but far worse, and plenty times over. take how young azula is when ozai let her loose into the world into account. take the fact that iroh was already a general by the time he was sieging bss into account. im not gonna compare and contrast crimes here but i am trying to put weight onto how long iroh has been in the game. nasty shit like this is bound to still creep in the shadows of irohs mind and will definitely slip out sometimes.

and i know i keep bringing up that one unfinished super gnarly au fic that features azulon putting zuko into irohs care following irohs return to ba sing se (after ozai disgraced himself in requesting azulon give ozai the throne since iroh lost his only heir). hopefully one day ill find it because i hate to think the author deleted it or whatever . but out of all the fics that dig into irohs crimes id say this one does it the deepest while also SOMEHOW managing to make iroh sympathetic just by how sheerly pathetic and miserable he is the whole time. ONE DAY THOUGH. i pray that i will find it. because i have like over 200 pages of history on ao3 and i cant remember when exactly i read the fic so . searching for it has been kind of difficult but if i find it trust i will post it lol

[liliesforeveryfandom]

"This isn’t something that can be attributed solely to Azula’s mental breakdown because she’s been like this even in the show." It's absolutely about Azula's mental state b/c she definitely was NOT like this in the show. In the show, she only fought enemies of the Fire Nation, including Zuko when he was considered a traitor. Most importantly, she did it with self-control & thought. She didn't randomly attack people out of nowhere. The panels you picked of her starting fights show her expressing paranoid delusions about Ursa, which is directly attributed to her mental breakdown.

Did we watch the same show? Azula constantly terrorizes those who are on her side. The first time the show introduces her, she literally threatens to kill the soldiers just because they said that the ship can’t sail l due to the tides, which is nobody’s fault. Not to mention she intimates Ty Lee, her closet friend who believed the same imperialistic values she did, into forced obedience even though she did nothing to merit that initially. At the end of the show, she accuses her own personal allies like Lo & Li and the Dai Li of treason for no good reason. Despite none of these people posing a threat to Azula’s endgame, she still treats them horribly because it’s really about upholding her sense of superiority.

Either way, by “this” I wasn’t referring to Azula’s tendencies towards violence, I meant her ability to deceive others, especially Zuko. That’s why I said that her mind games in the comics follows “the pattern of her always taking it a mile when he gives her an inch.” Even when Azula was more stable, she was always a step ahead of Zuko, who she intentionally kept in the dark. She used Zuko’s need for acceptance to exploit him, which is why she usually manipulates by reminding him of his worthlessness or how him doing something that will benefit her will increase his worth. She was much more calculated and cunning about these tricks in the show than in the comics, but my point was that her hallucinations didn’t stop her from taking advantage of Zuko. She essentially invited herself on the search by pretending to burn all of Ursa’s letters but secretly keeping the one about Zuko’s paternity, leaving him with no option as Azula knows more about their mother. Despite her lying to Zuko multiple times and the physical threat she poses, he still trusts her enough to travel unbound and without questioning any ulterior motives.

This is what Zuko does in the show too. He initially goes with Azula’s plan to pretend that he killed Aang, but he realizes that he loses that deal no matter what. He unceasingly gives her the benefit of the doubt because he’s kind enough to do so and Azula has been trained to believe that compassion is a sign of inferiority because that trait was associated with her brother. Azula pulling the same cards as she has always done cannot be attributed to mental illness, it’s simply her relationship dynamic with Zuko, with him beneath her.

[waterfire1848]

Chapter 1 - Goodbye Ursa. Hello Azula.

Baby!Zula AU

Zuko remembers the day perfectly. He was nine when his mom told him he was going to be a big brother. She said that in a few months there was going to be a baby girl or boy in the palace and that person would be his new little sister or brother. Zuko remembered being excited. He remembered sitting next to his mom when she read her books and asking her why her stomach was so big now.

Everyone in the palace seemed excited as the day came for his sibling’s birth. Even his father was nicer and his mom seemed a lot calmer. She walked around as if a weight was off her shoulders and she could finally breath again.

Then it happened.

They were feeding the turtleducks when his mom screamed in pain. Zuko didn’t know what to do. He screamed for father, the servants, anyone. Someone just had to help his mom. Servants came running out and brought her into the medical wing.

“I’m sorry, Prince Zuko.” A servant told the ten year old, “You’re not allowed.”

His father went in a few minutes later. A look of anger, concern and a little fear on his face, but he didn't so much as glare at his son. Zuko was forced to remain outside and the fear stewed in his stomach. He thought about his mom, his father and the baby. Everyone had been so happy about the baby, but now it seemed like their was an air of fear around the palace. As if everyone knew something was going to happen but they didn't know when.

Zuko's eyes started to grow tired as the daylight disappeared. A few seconds after he fell asleep, a servant came out and lightly shook his shoulders.

"Prince Zuko."

Zuko blinked his eyes open, rubbing them, "Mom?"

"No. I...I'm sorry."

"Where's my mom?" Zuko asked.

"She..." The servant looked like she was looking for the correct words, as if one bad word would break Zuko into a million pieces, "There were complications with the baby."

Zuko still looked confused so the servant decided just to say it, "Your mom died. I'm so sorry-Prince Zuko!"

Zuko ran past her and into the medical wing. People yelled at him to stop, but, in Zuko's mind, if they cared so much they would have to grab him and force him out of the room. He went to his mother's bed where a white cloth was over her body. His father at at the window with a tiny thing in his arms. It took Zuko a second to realize that thing was his sibling.

"Mom?" He whispered.

Nothing. No words, no movement, absolutely nothing.

"Mom!" He screamed, "MOM!"

"Get him out of here!" His father yelled.

Zuko could hear someone else screaming but couldn't bring himself to care. His mom was dead. She was dead and there was nothing he could do about it. His knees hit the floor and tears ran down his face as he sobbed. A servant came into the room, picking him up and bringing him back to his room. Zuko didn't try to leave his room after that, he just sobbed.

He cried until he psychically could not cry anymore. There were no tears left.

"Mom...please come back. Please. Mommy please come back." He whispered into his pillow.

His door opened making his head shoot up. Did the spirits hear his cries? Did they hear him ask for her back? Did Agni give them a miracle?

His father stepped through the door.

"You have a little sister. Her name is Azula." That was all he said.

He said nothing about Ursa, there were no words given to his son, nothing about how much pain he was in. A simple two sentences and that was it.

"Azula." He whispered, "It's her fault. It's all her fault."

-------------

That night, he couldn't sleep. He didn't know if he'd every sleep again, but he knew that he wasn't sleeping that night. While he laid in his bed, he could hear the soft cries of his new little sister. He heard the servants mention how they were going to get a special woman to take care of Azula, but, for the night, they would just have to make due.

After half an hour, she was still crying. Zuko got up and made his way into her room. It wasn’t really her room, it was his mother’s room. When Ursa has been pregnant, she told Zuko that the baby needed to stay close to her, so they set up a crib and some stuff for her in his mother’s room. Where his mother should be there was now an empty bed.

He made his way over to the crying child, peering into her crib. Even though it was dark, there was just enough light from the moon to illuminate her golden eyes. His heart clenched when he saw her. She was full of baby fat but she kinda looked like his mom. The resemblance was faint but it was there. Zuko had a feeling that it would grow the older she got.

Carefully, he picked her up. She weighed almost nothing. It was like holding a book. When she realized she was being held, she nuzzled closer to his body. Her cries softened.

Zuko brought her over to the bed and sat down, trying very hard not to make her cry. If he remembered his mom’s books correctly, almost everything made a baby cry. They were really sensitive.

“You would have loved mom.” He told her, his voice barely above a whisper, “She would have loved you, held you, played with you, comforted you, protected you…but she can’t do that anymore.”

He was cut off when his sister grabbed one of his fingers, “It’s not your fault. You didn’t mean to…you didn’t do anything wrong.” He blinked his eyes to keep the tears out, “I guess if she can’t do all that anymore, I will. I promise. I’ll take care of you. Just like she would have.” Azula was asleep in his arms so Zuko set her back down in her crib.

He fell asleep on his mom’s bed, too tired to return to his own room. At the first sign of daylight, Azula was screaming at full volume.

“I’m up.” The ten year old mumbled, “I’m here. What is it?”

Azula’s screams were of no help to him, so he picked her up but she kept screaming.

“Okay. Umm….mom said you could cry if you’re scared which you aren’t. You’re not dirty, you don’t just want me…ummm…”

A servant, one of the nicer ones named Amaya, came in a few seconds later. She was an older woman with long black hair that was always tied into a perfect top knot. Zuko could always tell her apart from everyone else instantly because she had a scar on her right ear.

“Prince Zuko. What are you doing here?”

“Azula’s crying.” He told her.

She smiled, “I can see that. Can I hold her? Zuko looked at her with narrow eyes, “I promise she’ll be safe. I think she’s hungry.”

“Ohhhhh. I can make her some eggs.” He proudly proclaimed.

Amaya laughed a little, “She can’t eat eggs quiet yet. We have someone coming who can feed her. Can you go get changed and ready for your lessons?”

“But Azula-“

“She’ll be fine. The Fire Lord has assigned me to watch over her until he deems her ready to be on her own. I can watch her while you’re doing your lessons then you can come see her afterwards, okay?”

“Okay.”

With that a new routine began. Zuko would go to his lessons while Amaya and a new woman named Hana took care of Azula. Once Zuko was done, he rushed to his sister’s room to do his part. Amaya was genuinely surprised by how much Zuko did. He learned how to dress her, change her, give her a bottle, how to properly play with her, how to get her to bed. Everything Amaya and Hana were willing to teach Zuko he was willing to learn.

“I still wish you could have met mom.” He whispered to her when putting her bed.

But they didn’t have Ursa anymore. Azula would grow up without a mother. Zuko would have to be enough for her.

————————

Zuko was in the royal library, reading a book on newborns. He was also surrounded by history, math, and etiquette scrolls and books but he’d decided to push those to the side for a second and read up on newborns. Then he felt someone staring at him and a hand on his shoulder.

“Prince Zuko.”

“Father.” He quickly pushed his current book off to the side.

“You’ve been spending a fair amount of time with the baby. Why?”

Zuko’s had chosen to stare at his father’s lips, it was the best bet to avoid his anger, “I’m just spending some time with my little sister. I thought you wouldn’t want to be bothered with a baby.”

Ozai raised an eyebrow, “You are prince. Taking care of children is not your place. If this becomes too time consuming for you, I will make sure to keep Azula and you apart. You’re already a worthless firebender. Can you imagine the dishonor you’d bring if you were also stupid?”

“Azula won’t take up my time. I swear.”

“Good.” Ozai grabbed the book on newborns from Zuko, “I expect a full explanation about Sozin’s attack on the Air Nomads by dinner.”

Once he was gone, Zuko let out a breath of relief and started reading up on Sozin’s attack. Despite his fear of his father, he wasn’t afraid of getting hit or burned in this moment. He was afraid of being separated from Azula. He already lost his mom. He couldn’t help handle losing his sister too.

[asocial-inkblot]

Just wanted to share about what one of my brothers was saying the day before.

Gonna have to paraphrase here:

So I found out recently that my brother is an "Azula wasn't sympathetic" fan; and that was his exact argument, whereas I, of course, argued the opposite. The problem was that I'm so used to and sick of hearing that same old tired argument(s) that I at times struggled to explain my viewpoint in a respectable way and ended up insulting him (first?). He insulted me too but that doesn't matter, I guess (also that's beside the point).

I realized after that we both made good points and told him as much, but I don't think I was able to convey to him what I was trying to get at. I now think the reason why he just couldn't understand where I was coming from originally (and still technically am) is that we truly were basing our arguments on two different worldviews and I believe it may be the same with other anti-Azulas (for lack of a better phrase).

His argument hinged on the idea that how you act is all you deserve to be seen as. That what someone does or how they present themself to the world, dictates how much sympathy he/she/they deserve.

Mine however, came from a place of understanding and the belief that who you can be and who you were kept from being, matter more than who you currently are, as it pertains to the deserving of sympathy.

He also argued that the general consensus of the fandom is proof enough, but we Azula fans know that the general population doesn't just get to decide how everyone views someone or something. Outliers matter too, especially large outliers like the Azula fandom (that appears to grow more and more everyday ✨⭐️).

Although I eventually agreed, for example, with his assertion that Ozai preferred Azula over Zuko because she was more "ruthless" (or less compassionate when they were young children, as I saw it). I still believe that my original point that he actually preferred her because she was the superior bender, was true as well. I argued that he used her for that reason. My brother however, I guess didn't pay attention to the word "used". Being used by a parent is damaging to a child's psyche and teaches them from a young age that they exist to satisfy others, and be tools for others' glory.

Perhaps more importantly—beyond the fact that I pointed out she was only 14, was indoctrinated almost from birth and that Ursa was NOT afraid of her but actually scolded her (due to thinking Azula was inappropriate and perhaps un-ladylike, not "evil")—I also had in mind that Ozai's favoring her was a point against her childhood, not for it. There are still people in the world that think Ozai's preference for Azula was something to envy when that couldn't be further from the truth. The fact that Ursa favored Zuko and Ozai favored Azula is one of the, if not the biggest examples of and reasons for why Azula deserved sympathy.

Children need love, appreciation, encouragement and safety. Not favoritism, egocentric-interest, manipulation and fear.

(There were other things said while my other brother watched that I angrily disagreed with and that I myself may have been wrong to say/came across as overemotional because of, but I'll stop here. At least, for now.)

Edit: Small rephrasing.

[balanceoflightanddark]

Well... I don't think that Azula hallucinating Ursa is her first hallucination.

Her reaction is slight initial surprise but then she's immeadiatley just ... annoyed. She isn't shocked or freaked out at all. It's like she's used to it. She talks to the hallucination as if it was just another day. Then she smashes the mirror, like she is fully accquainted with the fact that this isn't real.

That's not the reaction of someone who sees and hears their lost mother for the first time. No way.

(Ofc some people don't like to headcannon in this direction of her having long-lasting mental illness and prefer to think it was just a single breakdown. Which I get and is super fine).

Just thought, objectively looking at the scene, there's no freaking way this was her first hallucination.

It looks like she's been dealing with this for quite some time. And surely alone. She couldn't show weakness to Ozai. And I don't think the royal palace is big on mental health.

;

Headcanon that fits this:

Despite Azula's betrayal of Ozai (lying to him, failing him etc.), he still planned to keep using her because... that's what narcissists do. They use you as long as you can be used. And Azula is super useful! Why would he throw her away after all she did for him? When she is still so desperate for his "love"? When she could still be so very useful to him?

He wanted to keep using her, but when he saw Azula starting to "lose her mind", he decided to ditch her.

Iroh: "She's crazy and she needs to go down"

Ozai: "She's crazy... gotta ditch her. (...) Better give her the throne she never wanted so she doesn't kill me. Lmao if she turns on me im dead this bitch has blue fire, killed the avatar and conquered Ba Sing Se. She different. I still can't read maps and fire only comes out when angry"

...okay. Let me just preface this with saying that Ozai's last sentence is hilarious, is completely in-character, and should be framed.

I should also say that...since we're gonna be going into territory which is a bit of a sore subject for myself, whatever I say is not an attempt to tear you down. I do not believe in that and will try to keep this as levelheaded as possible.

With that said, while I certainly respect your opinion on Azula...I still don't believe that she has a mental illness that results in recurring hallucinations. We only have the one scene and there's only so much we can get from that. And I certainly don't think we should base everything we know of a character over their worst and lowest moment. I know because...I was guilty of that with Zuko.

But I digress.

This masterpost belongs to my dear friend @prying-pandora666 who goes into quite a bit of detail concerning Azula and mental health if you're interested. But the crux of it is, when looking at it from the lens of a professional, we don't have any evidence that Azula was mentally ill. Does that mean she wasn't? No. Of course not. It's just we don't have too much onscreen evidence to make a definitive conclusion.

And even if Azula was mentally ill (I don't think she was and was probably suffering from a mental breakdown), one should be careful to make sure it's not overemphasized to the detriment of her upbringing and Ozai's bullshit. After all, even the best kid wouldn't last too long under his parentage without getting SOME kind of trauma.

As for your headcanon, I don't necessarily believe Ozai was aware of Azula's deteriorating mental state. She didn't show any signs of it initially and he left before things got really bad. In this case though, I'd pin the blame more on Ozai's lack of focus on Book 3. Is it possible he saw the signs? Yeah, and I can believe that. Doesn't make him any less of a scumbag for abandoning her. I'd argue it makes him even worse since he left her when she needed him most after years of presenting himself as the only stable adult figure in her life.

And as a quick aside, can please stop using the "crazy and needs to go down" quote as evidence? Eshasz and Greg Baldwin both said that Iroh was in the wrong there for saying that.

...sorry. I have autism which can be constituted as a mental illness, so I get a little bit tender when discussing this. There's nothing inherently wrong with Azula being mentally ill like so many would say and you're completely within your right to believe she is. My personal advice would be to just...be careful is all. Treat Azula as a person instead of a mental illness, never try to give people the wrong idea about mental illnesses or misdiagnosing characters (especially minors) and you'll be fine.

[akiizayoi4869]

Azula and Ursa: A Complicated Mother-Daughter Relationship

I've been meaning to do this one for a while now but kept on forgetting to do so. The relationship between these two is one that has always interested me because there is so much to it. Unfortunately though the writers have no interest in diving deeper into it because Azula isn't Zuko. It's a shame that they don't explore it further because this right here?

That is a whole lot to unpack. I really hope that these two can reconcile one day (seriously writers just do it already!) because Azula deserves to have a relationship with her mother. Ursa needs to own up to the fact that she wasn't a very good mother to Azula and make up for that. In this meta I will be explaining why Ursa wasn't a good mother to Azula.

Ursa failed to realize why Azula would act out

We all know that little kids do stupid stuff, right? It's a part of growing up. All of us were kids at one point, we all did stuff that we can look back on and think "Wow, that was pretty dumb. Why did I do that?" Sometimes we may have acted out in a way because we wanted attention from our parents or whoever our guardians were because we weren't getting enough attention. These actions could sometimes lead to a negative response from our parents, but that was fine because at least we had their attention.

In that scene in The Search where Azula burns that flower in the garden when she was walking behind Ursa and Zuko, that is exactly why she did it.

In the first panel we see Azula trailing behind Ursa and Zuko as they seem to be enjoying the conversation that they were having. Ursa was giving her full attention to Zuko and wasn't paying Azula any mind at all. So what does Azula do? She burns the first thing that she sees, which is a flower. Now going by what she did to Zuko, she didn't want him to say anything and most likely wanted Ursa to notice it on her own. Either way she got the desired result: Ursa was now taking notice of her. Yes, it was negative attention but it didn't matter. What did matter was that Azula was finally being seen by her mother. Even if it was only for a few short minutes. Ursa then shouts at Azula and tells her to go to her room, and then immediately her focus is back on Zuko.

Now, I don't necessarily blame Ursa for this, not at all. She was making sure that Zuko was ok since Azula just gave him a little burn. However, she failed to realize why Azula acted out that way. And no, Azula burning that flower doesn't mean that she is a sociopath. Keep in mind that this is the FIRE NATION, where people have magical fire powers. Azula was 8 or 9 years old here. What do you expect a kid who is that age with fire powers to do? What would you have done at that age with fire powers?

Ursa only scolded Azula but did not explain why what she was doing was wrong

Now this was something that I honestly found to be odd about Ursa's approach to parenting when I noticed it. If a child does something wrong, it's the parents job to tell them to stop and to explain why whatever it was that they did was wrong, and to not do it again. Now, Ursa does do this. But only with Zuko.

In this scene, Zuko throws a loaf of bread at the turtle ducks. Ursa is shocked at this and gently scolds him. However, she also explained to him why it was wrong. He more than likely did not do it again after this incident.

When Azula burns the flower and then gives Zuko a little burn, all she does is shout at Azula and tells her to go to her room and think about what she did. I really shouldn't need to explain why this is bad parenting right here. And this is what I find to be odd about Ursa's approach to discipline. In my experience as the youngest child, whenever I did something wrong, my parents would scold me obviously, and depending on how bad whatever I did was, I would get hit. However, they never failed to explain why what I did was wrong. By explaining it to me it ensured that I wouldn't do it again. It's assumed that the youngest child often needs things explained to them more than the oldest child since they are younger and don't understand things like the oldest child does. Not to say that the eldest one shouldn't get things explained to them, because they absolutely should. My parents did the same thing with my sister. Seeing as Azula is the youngest child, it's baffling that Ursa never seemed to do that with her.

I have no doubts that this looked a certain type of way to Azula and made her think that something was wrong with her. "Why is she only like that with Zuko? Why is it that whenever he gets into trouble, she's always gentle with him and explains why whatever he did was wrong? What makes him so special? What's so different about me that she can't do the same thing?" These were the thoughts that no doubt ran through her mind, and she most likely felt disconnected from her mother.

Ursa did not try hard enough to connect with Azula

Now before anyone goes "Azula was always with Ozai! He wouldn't let her be around her mother at all because he wanted Azula to train constantly!" I just want to say this: that's a load of shit. That man was not around her 24/7. He was a prince, I'm pretty sure that he had plenty of responsibilities to fulfill, none of which included his children. Azula also wasn't constantly training, there is literally proof in canon that says otherwise. Ursa could have spent time with Azula. And yet we don't get the sense that she did. She was always with Zuko. Which, to a certain point, is perfectly understandable. Ozai did not give Zuko the time of day and treated him like dirt because his firebending didn't reach his expectations. So Ursa wanted to make sure that Zuko knew that he was loved by one of his parents. Which is completely fine. What isn't fine though is how she pretty much neglected Azula. And I get that her situation was hard because she was in a abusive marriage with a man who was also abusive to his kids. But she still could have put in the extra effort for her daughter. She sure did for Zuko. It's obvious that she saw Azula as a difficult child, and thus leaned more towards Zuko, who was easier for her to deal with. I'm sure that she could have found something to bond with Azula. Asking your kids what their interests are can go a long way.

So in conclusion, I don't think that Ursa was a good mom to Azula. Her situation made it difficult, but she could have done more. This doesn't mean that Ursa can't do anything to make up for this though. Azula is only, what, 15? 16? She's still a kid. Ursa has all the time in the world to make up for her mistakes with her daughter. She just needs to put in the effort and realize where she fucked up at with Azula. Of course this all comes down to whether or not the writers ever actually let these two reconcile at some point. I really hope that they do, because I refuse to accept this as an end to they're relationship:

[azulatheblorbo]

Whispered Secrets in the Dark: Chapter I - Body Changes

do block this blog if you don't like A/B/O & incest fics so I don't show up in the tag for you

pairing: Azula x Ursa | rating: explicit | A/B/O; alpha!Azula x omega!Ursa

general content warnings: omegaverse (feat. g!p), explicit sexual content, parent-child incest, consensual underage sex.

There are natural changes in the body of an alpha, she’s more than educated about them.

The main ones consist of:

One, a growth spurt. An alpha might shoot up one or two heads, sometimes even more. Azula finds it quite annoying, suddenly she has a lot more arms and legs to mind. All the grace is gone, replaced by an awkward alpha adolescent. It gets her training for even longer so she gets used to having more body to move through katas. It is fun that she’s taller than Mai now, and then Zuko, who won’t grow an inch taller. She was already almost taller than Uncle Iroh, and not absurdly shorter than Lu Ten. 

Oh, she’s also close to Father’s height.

Even better, now she’s taller than Mother.

Two, muscles mount up crazy fast. Someone with a rigid, constant routine of exercises builds up muscle mass quickly. It helps them to not get stuck with not enough strength to support the new height. Azula had muscles before, a toned, lean body. Training from a young age, her body has been built to be optimal. Now she’s eating five times more than before and is starting to catch up with fellow alpha Firebenders.

She  likes to ignore the looks, pretend she doesn’t see them, because they come when she’s busy with something important. In loose pants and chest wrapping, making her heavier body stay fast and agile is more important than fooling around.

Three, the whole sexual attraction part. The most annoying and inconvenient side of growing up. She prefers constantly falling on her butt because her legs are twice as long as they were before than waking up with a raging boner, and having those all day without indications of why. She was just eating stolen mochis, what the fuck is her cock doing?

Noticing people isn’t quite bothersome. She has noticed Ty Lee before, the beautiful, amazing omega that has been her friend for so long that Azula can’t remember her life without Ty Lee in it. A comforting, warm presence. Mai isn’t that different, in her life for so long that it feels wrong to think of it without her. It doesn’t matter if most of the nobility would say there’s something very wrong with her. Mai is beautiful, having the same secondary sex doesn’t change a thing.

Azula’s almost late to the “puberty 2.0, when your life becomes unbearable because you’re a ball of raging hormones”. So close to seventeen, she heard a physician or two start to worry about the delay. Now it’s here and she wishes it wasn’t.

It’s annoying, anything turns her on.

Including being scolded by Mother, who then reaches up to her ears and drags her across the palace so Azula is to “stay in your room and think of what you have done”. Whatever she has done is out of her head because of all the omegas in the world, the one catching most of my attention has to be my Mother? Ty Lee is right there!

She ignores the unwelcomed, unwanted erection for hours, to the point of aching, because she refuses to touch herself thinking about the older Princess.

She reads scrolls, practices cold katas, a servant brings dinner, and she reads some more scrolls. But none of it calms her down enough, she gets a half-mast at best, it’s infuriating.

A long bath, wrapped in her silk robe, Azula lays on her bed with, yet again, fucking painfully hard. She stares at the ceiling, trying to think about anything but her Mother. The elegant, beautiful woman. (Is that some sort of self-cest? With how similar they could look… not that much anymore. Azula’s features sharpened as she finally lost what was left of her baby fat). 

And, once more, Azula loses the battle to her horny body.

Extremely annoyed, she kicks off the thin covers and unties her robe. Her body is divine, she isn’t humble enough to not appreciate her shape. Alpha or not, it needs hard work to stay in this shape. Perfectly sculpted muscles, beautiful earned muscles. She keeps herself well-groomed, and clean, a body built for battle and covered in soft, creamy skin.

Really, she’s perfect.

Oh, and there’s her cock. Slightly curved up, her readings told her that could be an advantage. (Ty Lee mentioned it, too.) Only a couple of more prominent veins, it looks smooth and matches the rest of her complexion. Quite a pretty thing. Comparing it to the only other dick she has actually seen, it’s shorter but thicker (seems to fit the fact that Azula is also shorter but thicker than Mai. Mai is really the less bulky alpha Azula has ever seen). her hand does wrap itself around it, but fingers don’t overlay that much.

Average length, above average width, she has read.

Overall, she thinks, she got a nice dick. An annoying one that has been bothering her for hours, but a nice one nonetheless. 

Mai has told her it’s good to keep a small bottle of massage oil for lubrication, and some handy washcloths to clean the mess. Azula, thinking she’s above masturbation, decided not to. Which now seems stupid after hours of being turned on (like the stupid hormone-riddled kid she is). 

It might be a little humiliating, but well, spit it is.

Azula sits up, resting her back against the headboard. Spitting on her hand causes quite nasty noises, it’s disgusting but it’ll have to work, she had tried doing it dry and it wasn’t pleasant at all. Making sure she’s comfortable, Azula wraps her fingers around her annoyance of a dick. 

She sighs, after a day of  ignoring it, of giving no actual stimulation at all and keeping it imprisoned by tight under wrappings, any relief touching is great. Azula isn’t stoic enough to hold back a sigh, she’s alone, she’s allowed to react to pleasuring herself. Slow, methodic strokes, perfect pace (like everything else she does). It’s heavy and throbbing against her soft palm, her own touch is soothing and stimulating at the same time.

If her self-control was any less perfect, she’d dangerously close to set the bed on fire when a wave of pleasure rushes over her. Hot like molten lava, it fills her with despair to cum.

There’s a knock on the door, a less well-controlled Firebender would get themsel a serious case of Charred Penis

She’s thankful for the acquired habit of locking her door (one too many close calls of Zuko catching her having quality alone time) when, of all other people living in the palace, it’s Mother’s voice that comes from the door: “Azula, sweetie, can we talk?”

[hello-nichya-here]

So, what make you see Zuko's dream about the blue and red dragons as a sign of him being attracted to Azula? I always just saw that was a foreshadow to the scene in the catacombs where Azula and Iroh were urging him to join different sides.

Oh, it absolutely was meant to be just foreshadowing for that big moment in Crossroads of Destiny. However this is one of the things that makes me say Zucest is the kind of ship in which context makes it worse because the writers did not think of the implications of some moments.

At that point in the story, Azula was not trying to influence Zuko or make him join her. Quite the contrary. She's an enemy hunting him down, and ocasionally toying with him when they are in the same place. It makes no sense for Zuko to feel like he has to choose between Iroh and Azula when any relationship with Azula, even purely familial, is just not in the realm of possibility.

Or rather, it makes no sense, unless we take that scene as Zuko processing how he sees his family (fitting considering those fever dreams are meant to "reveal his true self"). Iroh is wise mentor trying to guide him to the right path, Ursa is implied to be dead (we get confirmation in The Day Of Black Sun that Zuko really thought she was gone), Ozai is absent and thus Zuko is finally in a position of power AND without the scar (aka trauma).

And then there's Azula. Apparently happy that their mom is gone (Zuko is proven to be wrong about that in The Beach and in The Finale), and wanting... something from her brother. Offering him... something.

Again, if Azula has not actually offered Zuko anything, WHY is his mind putting her in the role of TEMPTATION away from the correct path? Any pretence of "I'm not your enemy" has been dropped at the start of the season, so the only reason why Zuko could be so hung up on it is because he wants something from her.

And what exactly is it that he wants from his sister?

Attention? Likely. Zuko doesn't like being ignored, and we see him actively DEMAND an Agni Kai with her just to prove himself.

An actual, normal, healhty sibling relationship? Possibly. They were significantly less hostile to each other for the majority of Book 3, he looks upset seeing her "about to die" in The Southern Raiders, and the Last Agni Kai has the soundtrack of a tragedy.

Submission? Boy oh boy, does Zuko want Azula to submit to him. He literally said in the finale that he wanted to "put her in her place", and this weird fever dream of his she's an (evil) advisor/dragon, while he is the freaking Fire Lord, and she has to be all proper and adoringly call him "My Lord."

That last one, by itself, already can easily come with LOTS of implications - especially when this desire of "finally putting Azula in her place" is being shown, once again, as TEMPTATION.

And WHY, oh God, WHY does Zuko's idea of Azula "tempting him" include her being all submissive, whispering in his ear, asking him when he's planning to go to his bedroom, and trying to make him "sleep" by saying weird shit like "Relax. Just give into it"?

I know my mind is always in the gutter, but come on, with stuff like this dream and the freaking Bedroom Scene, the writers are not exactly making my job difficult here.

[hyacinths-in-a-storm]

Old Games and New Lives

Tyzula Week: Day 7 Unforgettable/Dream

You can read it here on archive of our own as well

A/N: I definitely didn't write this at one in the morning, only a crazy person would do that, especially when they know they have to wake up early the next day.

Ty Lee has a good life.

She knows this from the bottom of her heart. She is a Kyoshi Warrior, she teaches chi-blocking to eager students in her free-time. She even has a girl who she’s been on a couple of dates with.

Still, her aura didn’t seem to agree with her. Grey and black mingle with the already dull pink. Anything she did wouldn’t change her aura even the slightest. Even hanging out with her close friends barely shifted the hue.

Which is why she was at the exact same place that confused her aura the most. The guards glanced at her quickly before separating, granting her entrance. She nodded in appreciation.

The cell was darker then she last remembered, though of course the last time she remembered Azula was screaming bloody murder, which probably had some effect on the torches. It’s quieter now. Ty Lee doesn’t know whether that’s a good thing or not.

When she opens the door Azula doesn’t even stir, and for a second Ty Lee is terrified that she might be dead. She crouched down, and was relieved to notice that her chest moved up and down. She moved a strand of hair out of her face. She didn’t look peaceful, not even in her sleep.

Ty Lee didn’t understand why she was here, it didn’t serve her or Azula any purpose. When Azula woke up, she would probably yell at her to get out, to go back to her ‘fan-waving posse’ and leave her alone. Ty Lee didn’t realize she was crying until a tear trickled down her nose and fell onto her tongue. Not for the first time, she was glad that the Kyohsi Warrior face paint was water-proof.

“Ty Lee?” Ty Lee hadn’t even realized she was squeezing her eyes shut, until Azula called her name,

“Huh- what?” she answered scrubbing the tears from her eyes,

“You almost fell asleep. In my cell. You’ve either gotten significantly stronger since we last met or significantly stupider.” Azula said dryily, in way of greeting,

“I wanted to talk to you.” Ty Lee said, not quite processing the insult,

“What would you want to talk to me about?” Azula raised an eyebrow suspiciously. Ty Lee paused, in her mind she hadn’t gotten this far ahead,

“Well- let’s play a game.” she blurted out, Azula stopped staring at her suspiciously and more like she was the one who’d lost her mind, “Remember the dream game? Where we try to guess which story was an actual dream, and which story was real life?”

“I remember that Mai couldn’t win the game if luck personally came down and enchanted her tongue.” and despite herself, Ty Lee laughed,

“She really couldn’t. Speaking of which, I had a dream where Mai and Zuko broke up.” Ty Lee said, starting the game,

“Real, Mai and Zuko actually broke up in real life.”  Azula replied immediately, and Ty Lee nodded in defeat, before motioning for Azula to continue,

“I had a dream that my mother combed my hair.” Ty Lee sucked through her teeth, bringing up Ursa around Azula was a 50/50 chance that she would either laugh it off, or she would blow up in your face. Ty Lee decided to tread quietly,

“Real.” was the option she ended up with, Azula shook her head smugly,

“Dream, my mother never did my hair, the servants always did it.” Ty Lee’s forced laugh didn’t match the pang of empathy she felt for Azula, suddenly a shadow passed over her face,

“I had a dream where you loved me enough to stay.” Azula whispered, and the sentence temporarily punched the breath from her lungs. Ty Lee had to close her eyes before answering,

“I had a dream where you loved me right.” she said instead of deciding if it were real or dream,

“I had a dream where you loved me at all.”

“Real.” Ty Lee whispered, so quietly it barely reached her own ears,

“Why did you come here today Ty Lee? To mock me?” Azula asked,

“I don’t know anymore than you do, Azula.” Ty Lee answered truthfully, “Maybe I felt guilty for leaving you in this dank cell for months on end. Maybe I’m trying to remind myself why I left you in this dank cell for months on end.”

“Why did you leave me here?” Azula’s tone darkened as if she didn’t particularly care for the answer,

“I don’t love Mai more than I love you Azula- wait no, that’s not the right way to say it.” Ty Lee took a deep breath, collecting her thoughts, “What I mean to say is that I loved you more than I feared whatever you could do to me.”

“Then why did you leave?” Azula hissed,

“You weren’t yourself Azula, I’ve grown up with you I would know.” Azula looked at her with uncertainty, “I was more scared you would be lost to corruption your father had instituted in you.”

“My father didn’t do anything! He made me stronger, he made me more powerful. He was the one who taught me that fear is the only true way to rule.” she spit,

“You’re lying to yourself Azula, your father was a terrible man, a terrible husband, father, brother, terrible everything and anything.” Azula stared at her, and for a second Ty Lee thought she might protest, but instead she ground down her teeth,

“So then what now? I spend the rest of my life in a jail cell?” she asked, not meeting Ty Lee’s eyes,

“I don’t know Azula-”

“What do you know?” Azula interrupted,

“I know that the first step to getting out of here is to not insult and degrade every person around you.” Ty Lee said, sighing,

“What if they deserve it?” Azula countered,

“That’s a different story, and no Zuko existing does not mean he deserves it.” Ty Lee stated. Azula glared at her,

“Well unless some evil spirit possesses him to go back to that ponytail haircut, at that point I think you have my blessing as well as the rest of the world’s blessing to convince him otherwise, by any means necessary.” Ty Lee relented,

Azula laughs, an unexpected, bright sound that was unfamiliar to these dark, suffocating walls. It filled Ty Lee with a light, airy feeling as if she were flipping in the air. For the first time in a long time she felt something like hope. Hope for the future.

~

“You’re lucky she’s in a good mood today.” a guard informs her as she leaves half-an-hour later. “Usually she would scream or ignore you until you get out.”

Ty Lee nods, biting the inside of her cheek to stop herself from smiling so much. Her aura was brighter than it had been in a while. Brighter than it had been in probably years. Grey still clung to edges like an old scar, but pink had taken some of its space draping itself on her like a warm blanket. She stepped out into the sunlight, eager for once, for what the future held.

A/N: Last day of Tyzula Week! I thoroughly enjoyed all the prompts, and fun writing all these fics.

[phoukanamedpookie]

What can be gleaned about Azula in those moments when her mask slips?

One of the most fascinating things about Azula is that underneath her carefully maintained persona of perfection and invincibility lies a real human being.

So let's talk about that person under the façade.

But first, I have a favor to ask.

As we delve into this, can we focus on Azula? Can we not turn this exploration into blaming or pointing fingers at Zuko, Ursa, Iroh, Ozai, Bryke, or Gene Yang? While it's undeniable that the people in Azula's life have shaped who she is, I don't like making everything that Azula is entirely about them. She's a rich, layered, complex character in her own right, and I want to put my energy into that. By the same token, we have no control over what the showrunners and writers do, so I'd rather focus on the treasure of a character we have in Azula than in their shortcomings as storytellers and worldbuilders.

With that in mind, I'll get started.

There's a moment in the comics—yeah yeah boo hiss—there's an interaction Azula has with "Noriko" (Ursa who's been facebended and memorybended) that's very intriguing because it offers a sliver of what's going on beneath the surface with Azula. I'm not going to rehash the plot of The Search, but let's zero in on this part right here.

There's a lot of meaning packed into these two frames, but let's unpack what they reveal about Azula that we haven't been privy to before.

So, in the first frame, "Noriko" has just watched this kid she just met earlier that day (as far as she knows) break into her home, terrorize her family, threaten her life, and rave at her about plotting against her. And the thing that "Noriko" immediately understands is that Azula is an unloved child.

I'm not talking about a lack of warm, fuzzy feelings, OK? That's love as a noun. I'm talking about love as a verb. "Noriko" instantly recognizes that Azula was not nurtured, guided, and protected the way she needed and needs to be. Azula is a child who was not cared for properly.

Now, what's really interesting is how Azula reacts. Based on popular fandom takes about her, you'd think she'd brush it off or sling fire and insults at "Noriko." But that's not what happens. This tiny gesture of genuine care from someone who's practically a stranger brings Azula up short, stops her in her tracks, and utterly breaks her resolve to harm "Noriko." Despite Azula's capacity for cruelty and violence on full display in this scene, she instantly turns away from her murderous resolve the second she receives this infinitesimal gesture. It's nowhere near enough to make up for what she lacked growing up, yet it has such a powerful effect on how she behaves.

This suggests an answer to one of the perplexing questions about Azula: How do you get through to her? It's so simple. The answer is love. It wouldn't take a grand gesture. What "Noriko" does here is so, so small and simple. That's literally all it would take. And it's so, so sad that no one has bothered to try.

What about you? What are some moments that make you realize that there's more to Azula?

[peony-pearl]

Ursa received word the previous evening from Zuko that Ozai and his family would be in the next morning.

She steeled herself in front of the mirror, looking at the face he would see after a decade. They had only seen each other once since her initial banishment, and his time in prison had not done his mind any favors as he lashed out at her - purely for his own misgivings as his screams dissolved into messy, choking weeps as she said nothing, and left him with the same. Nothing, only the echoes of his sobs that rang off of the cold stone and steel of his prison cell.

To know he was out there, that someone was willing to take that man as a lover, to allow him to father their children...

Ursa hated the cavalcade of emotions the subject piqued.

Most of all, she hated the resounding jealousy that burned in her stomach. She and Ozai had never formally divorced, and had Ursa not needed to poison Azulon and experience banishment, she would have stayed. She remembered leaving in the night, and Ozai meeting her one last time as she boarded the boat he’d set up for her departure. He took her hand and escorted her up the ramp; one last touch as she glowered at him.

This had all been his fault. If he’d simply held his tongue instead of asking for so much - and so soon after his nephew’s passing. She looked at him, angry and mourning, that he could have just waited. Now the family was finally falling apart after years of him chiseling at the foundation he once promised to uphold.

She let him brush a tear away as he remained emotionless. She hated that. She hated his stoicism as he held her hand like a lifeline. He reached in to kiss her; but she refused him, turning her head like the demure lady she’d been trained to be, and he got the picture. He simply kissed her knuckles and released her hand from his.

He released her. But in doing so she was powerless to stop him from causing more harm to their children.

She thought about seeing Zuko again for the first time in six years, and seeing her beautiful son’s burnt eye; the ridges of charred skin, the way it no longer completely opened.

She thought about seeing Azula in the hospital, screaming. How every howl broke Ursa’s heart; how she thought about the day Azula was born and her cries upon her arrival, and now her voice was almost broken with how long she’d been crying out at the world, at her father, at everyone who had abandoned her.

How Zuko had taken on the task of finding ways for his sister to heal, only for none of them to truly work, until Ursa stepped inside of the cell. Azula, seeing her mother, screamed again. How she rebuked the visage of the woman, as though she had seen her frequently. Ursa, confused, spoke to Azula, but she tried to put her hands over her ears.

Zuko feared for his mother, but she refused to do nothing. Instead, she reached out to touch her daughter’s tear-soaked cheek.

And Azula froze. She stared up at her mother, and Ursa looked into her daughter’s eyes that once denied her - now Azula looked at her mother realizing she was home.

Her mother came back to her, despite everything Ozai had told her. She came back, and she held Azula, and kissed her forehead and called her ‘my darling’.

No trace of fearing a monster in her voice.

Ursa would never forget the way Azula melted in her arms, and as her tears subsided, the sigh of relief as Azula rested her head on her mother’s shoulder. Ursa turned to see Zuko and Iroh, both concerned, but hopeful as Ursa beckoned them to join, and they sat with Ursa and Azula in a peaceful, hopeful quiet.

Ursa looked into the mirror once more, remembering how Ozai had desecrated all promises to protect their children. And now, out there, was a woman who knew everything he had done - and still loved him. Ursa frowned, wondering how she would react upon meeting this woman. Ursa wondered if she would see dead light in the eyes of the children, their innocence being slowly vanquished by their father.

Ursa felt hands at her shoulders. She softly jumped, but only felt Noren’s strong grip as she sighed and leaned back into him.

“I want to tell you it’s going to be okay,” he said. “But I don’t want to sound overly optimistic.”

Ursa swallowed. “Tell me anyway?” She asked, her voice sounding smaller than she wanted it to. Noren leaned down, pressing his lips to her forehead.

“It’s going to be okay.”

The hours passed. She had to sleep sometime. She thought about Kiyi, asleep in a room across, being near the age Zuko was when he was scarred.

Ursa had a dreamless sleep that took her much too fast into the next day. She awoke, her stomach full of dread. Noren squeezed her hand as she finally removed herself from the bed.

She could see the worry in the older maids. The younger, newer staff were only excited for the gossip. Ursa could tell in the ways the younger women quickly stopped speaking and scattered when she walked through the halls.

There was a rise in voices as she reached a foyer.

The dread rose. She heard the excited babble of a child, and the squeals of a toddler, as well as Aang shouting some excited words.

“I can’t believe it! Maybe it’ll be another Airbender!”

The laugh of a woman Ursa didn’t recognize echoed through the hall.

“We don’t even know if Katsu is an Airbender yet.”

Judging by this answer, Ursa immediately knew she was hearing the voice of Niwa. She emotionally recoiled, and yet, something Aang said caught her attention. She turned the corner enough to get a glimpse of the gathering: Zuko, Azula and Aang were welcoming this woman. Standing in front of her was a small girl.

Chiyo... Ursa looked at Ozai’s second daughter. She was bright eyed and smiling, obviously happy to be around her big siblings and Aang. 

Ursa’s eyes wandered, she didn’t see Ozai, until a shift in the shadows caught her attention.

She could only see the back of his hair, but she noticed a toddler bumping around the hall in interest, looking at the tapestries on the wall. He tugged at one and Ursa noticed the figure of Ozai approach him - she waited for him to smack the child’s hand, but instead he leaned down and gently plied the tot’s hand from gripping the tapestry too hard.

She saw him talking to the boy, who must have been little Katsu. Ursa felt a boiling sensation in the pit of her stomach, she turned to leave before Ozai could see her.

And then she noticed it. Chiyo moved to join her father and baby brother - and the excitement Aang had been mentioning was showcased in how Niwa’s garb fell over her rounded stomach.

A quick break in the talk; silence echoed louder than a crowd. Ursa looked up to see Niwa looking her way.

Niwa, she now saw her; a woman with large olive eyes and thick, waving chestnut hair. She smiled; not a care in her obviously empty head.

“Ursa.” That voice sent chills down her spine. Ursa saw Ozai looking to her, holding his son as his daughter held his hand. “H-hi,” he greeted.

Zuko panicked. “Hey mom; why don’t you-”

Ursa was gone before another word could be uttered. She turned on her heel and let her emotions take over, letting her autopilot her way back to her room.

[mugentakeda]

as soon as ursa registered that the person that just stepped into the garden was a messenger dressed in white, she knew her nephew was dead.

he'd only departed for ba sing se a few weeks ago. she'd gotten one hawk from him while he was still on his way to the faraway city- passionate descriptions about the beautiful earth kingdom terrain and scenery, his nervousness and dread, how much he already missed the kids and her and home.

she already knew he didn't want to go. just a month shy of 600 days did lu ten manage to hold off on joining his father in his divine quest, to get the capital of the earth kingdom to finally surrender. holding strong to his decision, despite pressure and badgering from every direction. ursa never cared. she knew ozai cared, firelord azulon cared, the whole council and nobility cared- but ursa has always cursed the council and nobility anyway. she knows her nephew's heart is true and hardworking even if he's not the most open about his patriotism, and knows that he's always been stubborn and independent. spirits, if she was a prince, she isn't sure that she'd want to spend her first big military venture in her father's shadow either. iroh had respected his son's wishes without a fight, just like ursa knew her honorable brother-in-law would, and left for ba sing se alone. that should've been the end of that.

azula told her (rather sourly) that the strange navy fellow that lu ten had been peers with while training under admiral jeong jeong managed to convince him otherwise. how, her daughter wasn't sure, and wasn't pleased. ursa had asked lu ten about it not much later, easily confessing to her nephew that she heard through the lychee-grape vine that he'd changed his mind about ba sing se- but he'd been cagey and evasive, and offered no real explanation. the evening later, he promptly announced at dinner that he'd be departing from the fire nation in the next couple days to join his father. and looked like he wanted to vomit afterwards, as firelord azulon put a weathered hand on his shoulder and shook him with satisfaction. she waited up late that night, praying he'd sneak to her chambers, so they could discuss the matter in whispers. but he never showed.

ursa had found him early the next morning, before agni even peeked over the horizon, tending to his beloved jogekama yari.

he sat up straight at the sound of her footsteps on the tile, and sighed heavily. as usual, lu ten knew it was his aunt without looking (unbeknownst to ursa, over the previous years, he'd been memorizing the sound of everyone in the family's footsteps. that way, he could mentally prepare himself for the interaction- lest the footsteps belong to ozai.).

I don't feel like being interrogated right now, auntie, he'd muttered. the young prince didn't sound angry, but terribly drained, and terribly defeated. the days where she could take one look at him and know exactly what was going through his head were long gone, sadly.

i'm sorry, she'd replied sadly. I just wanted to make sure you were truly alright. because… well, ever since I married your uncle….

his face pinched and he looked back down at his spear in silence. the hot morning air was heavy with foreboding. the rest went unspoken, as such things usually do in this suffocating palace they both call home. I think of you as my own.

she'd watched him grow up. she'd been there when his voice dropped, when he started growing sideburns, when he came home from shu jing armed with a mighty staff and bursting in pride, when the first sparks of lightning erupted from his hands and he made history. lu ten had been the only one to check in on her after she gave birth to zuko, and then the same with azula. he held them in his arms before ozai did. he'd been the one to choose azula's wet nurse when ursa was too sickened and depressed to eat well enough to breastfeed her baby girl. he was the one present for azula's first words and first steps- which is all now a secret between them that he's literally taken to the grave. her children's big brother in spirit, ursa's little brother and son from another mother.

the hands clutching the scroll tremble in despair and rage. what will happen now? her only teammate is gone. the one person in the whole world that truly went out of his way to look out for her and hers is gone. i'm not strong enough to hold him off on my own, my nephew, she thinks.

ursa bites the inside of her cheek until it bleeds to quell the tears welling up. you won't ever see him again. you're going to have to get used to living without him. he's never coming home. his father didn't keep him safe. it's over.

[perfectlypanda]

Hey, in this pandaverse, you think you can do another Zutara pic or strip but it features Azulaang? Whether it just shows Zuko and Katara's daughter Kya hanging and having fun with Aang and Azula's own daughter (whom I'm torn which to call her Ursa or Kiyi) or both whole families together in the pic?

Hi! I hope you don’t mind if I answer this publicly - I’ve gotten a few messages like this before and thought that instead of answering everyone privately each time like I have been I could just respond here in case there’s anyone else who had a similar question or is curious. :)

First, I love hearing everyone’s ideas! It’s so fun to see how many different directions people take these same characters. In terms of the “pandaverse”, I’ve only shared tiny snippets here through comics and art, but it’s actually a pretty thoroughly fleshed out headcanon universe. It follows the canon for AtLA and the graphic novels before diverging after the last of them (Imbalance). After that, I have a set timeline and history that leads to Zuko and Katara getting together in this universe, and what happens to their lives from there (including their children - Kya, Kallik, and Kira). I also know what happens to the other major characters. Aang eventually finds love with an original character (Rinchen, I believe is her most current name, but I don’t have my notes handy). I do know what happens next for Azula. Toph, Sokka, and Suki are present as well, of course. 

All of this came about because I’m “working” on a Zutara fic about the beginning of their relationship. I say “working” because that implies I’m doing a lot of writing on it when mostly I just brainstorm things in my head during my long commute, and do a lot of reading for “research” on different cultures and traditions. Spread across multiple different Google Docs, I probably have about 50,000 words of story written (and even more of random notes and scene ideas), but it’s not in any order. Anyway, if I ever finish that one, Azula’s story is actually the follow up to it. Which surprises me, because while I think she’s a cool character, she never jumped out as a favorite of mine. I just heard a song one day, and immediately could see what the climax of her story was going to be. But the Zutara one comes first.

Which is a long winded way of saying that, at least in things meant for the “pandaverse”, I’m only going to be including things that fit within the canon of that universe (even if that universe exists primarily in my head at the moment). However, I do love hearing everyone’s ideas and their own headcanons, so please feel free to keep sharing those with me! :)