#and then had aaron think of seb as his own child only for him to be taken away never to see him again

[sugdenlovesdingle]

I just hope that if they do bring back Seb that they actually don't talk about his vile mother at all. I stopped watching because of how Aaron was treated in that storyline and bringing back her child is like opening the gates to talking about her again.

I couldn't even enjoy any scenes with him in before because the entire time they were talking about Rebecca and it makes me feel so sad for my little fave Aaron. It's like Robert and Rebecca are the Main Couple and Aaron just the clinger on and it's horrible. Even if she's not in the show she's still there. Robert always put her feelings first because she's the mother of his child, even when she's being a complete vile person. I just want her wiped out and never mentioned again like the virus she is.

Losing Seb would be sad but at least it would draw a line under that horrible story and give Aaron and Robert a chance to have a family that they chose that can't be taken away from them, rather than having to work around her whims and demands.

I know you think he's the only good thing about that story but to a lot of us he is just a constant reminder, as the writers use him as an excuse to make scenes about her. "I can't he has to go back to his mums" "haha Rebecca said this when I dropped him home" "Rebecca doesn't want us doing this with him" etc etc etc even if it doesn't be to be said.

killing her off would be the bare minimum as long as she's not talked about. Aaron would'nt ever be a equal parent if she is alive, or even an equal husband in his own marriage. If Robert comes back with seb it would be exactly the same boring dad Robert who revolves around his son and his sons mother first. Which isn't robron. It's robecca featuring Aaron.

You don't have to respond to this by the way. Sorry.

I know I slept late today but did I wake up in 2017??

Sorry anon, I get what you mean, I used to feel that way too. Throughout rebecca's whole pregnancy I was like "how are they EVER going to fix this?? That baby will always be a reminder of The Incident." But then they showed Rob loving him and putting him first (instead of his schemes), and then AARON falling in love with him because he's Robert's and he loves Robert so he loves his son too.

And after she gave birth (which focused more on bringing Aaron back into the story than her having a baby) rebecca was an afterthought in her own kid's life. Seb was 'used' to bring robron closer together - with Aaron looking after him instead of spending time with his doctor boyfriend (🤣) - Aaron 'rescued' him when rebecca fucked off and nearly burnt Vic's house down, Aaron was the one to suggest Seb moved into the mill, and Aaron referred to himself as his stepdad/parent more than once ("This is about MY HUSBAND and MY STEPSON"). I'm willing to bet Aaron had more scenes with Seb (with or without Robert) than Rebecca did.

And after losing Rob, Seb was the only one who could put a smile on Aaron's face. He loves that little boy.

And even if they don't kill rebecca off off screen... That doesn't mean she'll get mentioned all the time. I mean Ross is supposedly very much alive in off screen land, yet Charity mentioned him maybe once the past year? Jai NEVER mentions Megan and Eliza - not when he and Laurel got married (you'd think he'd want his daughter there, right?), not when Rishi died (he was Eliza's granddad too), David never mentions Priya and Amba (and they left pretty recently), Gabby never talks about Jamie, Kim never talks about the demon child Millie. Vic never mentions Seb OR Robert. (There used to be a picture of Seb in Vic's house but it's gone now.)

So long story short, if they bring back Robert (🤡🤞) I really hope they'll let robron raise Seb AND let them have that football team of kids they talked about (Seb needs siblings!).

[echofades]

Charity and Vanessa were one of the only f/f couples on television raising children together. It was the kind of representation desperately needed for wlw to look up to and see that families like that could actually exist. 

I cut Emmerdale a little bit of slack for having to undo some of that work when they had to write Michelle out - but I at least had hope that they chose to complete the adoption before the breakup for a reason. That even if Vanity were apart they’d still make sure to treat Johnny as Charity’s child, to give some consideration to the family that they build together. But no. Johnny’s adoption was relevant for all of a week (to give us scenes of Mack crying about it, I guess), and aside from a throwaway line or two it may as well have never happened at this point. Not a single general audience member would list Johnny as one of Charity’s kids if asked. I don’t know what will happen when Vanessa leaves for a second time but if she goes by choice I don’t even expect them to give Charity and Johnny’s connection a second though. And Vanessa’s relationship with Moses, or Noah, or Sarah? Well those bonds never existed at all I guess. 

And now, just to really rub salt in the would... Charity might have a baby with Mack instead!! The fact that it is wildly out of character for Charity to want another baby at this point in her life, when she can barely keep track of the kids she already has, should have me believing that she will go through with an abortion, Mack will be angry because he wanted it, and it’ll split them up. But this is Emmerdale in a post-2020 world. So I can’t wait for them to have her decide to keep the baby, and get emotional about how she wasn’t in a good place when she had her other kids, and now she finally gets to bring a kid into the world in a happy wonderful stable relationship. 

When Johnny was supposed to be the child she chose. The family she created with Vanessa was what she chose.

I have no words :)

[nooneelsecomesclose17]

Blankets

Here we go. I'm aiming for a fic a day throughout December. I have about 12 written so far so we'll see how it goes. They're from varying universes that I've created and varying lengths so hopefully there's something for everyone.

I'll try and add the AO3 link before I post but it might not always happen. I will add it though at some point.

*****

(AO3 link)

How could one distraught little boy just disappear.

Aaron had been at work when Robert called, his voice breaking as he told him Seb was missing.

"I just went to get him a clean t-shirt after he spilt his drink over himself and when I came back he'd gone."

He'd gone home straight away. Worried out of his mind, already texting the family to get them to help search. Robert had been pacing frantically when he got home and he clung to him like a little child. Aaron knew he couldn’t let his own worry overtake him, he had to be strong for Robert first.

“I don’t know what to do Aaron, what if someone’s taken him, what if…”

“You can’t think like that. He’s just wandered off. We’ll find him, I promise.”

He’d left him then, telling him to let him check out his favourite places before they called the police, just in case he’d taken it upon himself to go to the playground without them, telling Robert to stay with the others in case Seb turned up, and he’d started searching worrying about how much the temperature had dropped in the short time he’d been in the house.

It was only three weeks since he’d come to live with them full time, the loss of his Mum in an accident still too raw for him to even start to settle in. They’d tried their best to keep everything normal for him, to make everything just the same as it was the times he’d visited but clearly they’d missed something.

He’s just taking one more look around the playground before admitting defeat when he hears a shuffling sound from the train.

“Seb?” He doesn’t get an answer, just more shuffling and he catches a glimpse of Seb’s yellow jacket. Creeping closer he pulls out his phone.

*I’ve found him, we’ll be home soon.*

When he reaches the train he crouches down by the side of the hollow engine, the space just big enough for a child and his heart stops pounding when he sees him, when he’s sure it’s him.

“Hey little bug, what are you doing in here?” He sits on the ground so he’s facing him. “Me and Daddy were ever so worried.” Seb doesn’t answer, just keeps staring at him. “I bet you’re cold. How about, we go home so Daddy can see you’re ok, and then maybe he’ll make you your favourite hot chocolate?”

Seb shakes his head, and Aaron sighs, knowing Robert will be going frantic at home waiting for them.

“You know me and your Dad, we love you so much and all we want to do is make sure you’re ok, and we can’t do that unless you tell us what’s going on. How about it?” Nothing but he can see Seb’s face change and he thinks he’s getting somewhere. “You know, it’s ok to be scared, I get scared all the time. Do you know who helps me when that happens?”

“No.”

“Your Daddy, because he’s so strong and he always knows the right things to say and he gives the best hugs. I bet you could really use a hug right now eh?” He gets a little nod. “Well I promise that your Dad is waiting at home and he wants nothing more than to give you the biggest hug in the world. So, how about it? Shall we go home?”

He held out his hand and slowly but surely Seb edges his way out until his hand is clutched in Aaron’s.

"There we go, let's get you home and warmed up."

The minute they're in the door Robert's there, scooping Seb out of his arms and whispering to him. Aaron just sinks into the chair letting the twins climb all over him, all the worry he'd pushed down while searching coming out.

“They were worried.” Robert’s by his shoulder, nodding at the two of them, clinging on tight. “I don’t think they understand why he’s here all the time, or why he ran off…then again nor do we.”

“Tell you what why don’t you warm him up, let him watch TV a bit and calm down, while I talk to these two. Then I’ll see if Mum can have them for a bit while we talk to him. We’ll sort this out Robert, promise.” Robert doesn’t look convinced but goes back to Seb. “Right, come on you two monsters, let’s got upstairs for a bit.”

They follow him, always do, like little shadows and he settles them all on Ella’s bed, Ben one side, her the other.

“What’s wrong with Sebby?”

“He’s just sad that’s all. You know how he used to spend some time here with us and some time with his Mummy?"

“With ‘Becca?” He nods at his daughter.

“Well now he lives with us all the time.”

“And that’s why he’s sad?” Ben asks, clutching onto one of the many cuddly toys Ella’s bed was home to.

“Kinda. He’s sad because his Mummy isn’t here anymore. Do you remember when we went to Spain to say goodbye to Daddy’s grandma?”

“Because she died.” Ella tells him and he nods.

“Yeah, well Seb’s Mummy died too and he’s sad because he misses her.”

“Like we miss you when you go away for scrap?”

“Yeah, only tons more because I always come back don’t I? But Seb’s Mummy can’t.” He puts his arms round both of them seeing them look sad. They met Rebecca a few times and she’d often bring stuff for them when she dropped Seb off. At first it had set his teeth on edge but in the end he’d realised it was just way of dealing with feeling uncomfortable around them even though they all got on well enough. “So for a while he’s going to be really sad, and some days he won’t feel like playing with you or watching TV, and other days he will.

“Do you think if I drew him a picture he would like that?”

“I think he’d love it. Tell you what, why don’t we pack some pens and your books to take to Nana’s. Me and Daddy need to talk to Seb a bit so Nana’s going to look after you and then we’ll all have tea at the pub later, ok?”

“Yeah! Nana has chips!” Ben’s off the bed and running into his room before Aaron can stop him.

“And you’ll make Seb better?”

“I’m going to try sweetheart. We just have to be extra nice to him for a bit yeah. Good girl. Right, pack your stuff while I call Nana.”

When he’s dropped them off at the pub he heads back to the house, no idea how to even start to get Seb to open up to them. His Mum had given him a few ideas but he had no clue if they’d work or not.

When he's gets inside he finds Seb on the sofa, cuddled up to Robert, underneath the bright blanket that lived on his bed and he was clutching his cuddly giraffe that he’d had as a baby.

"He hasn't said a word.” Robert whispered.

"He will when he's ready. Now, I promised him one of Daddy Robert's special hot chocolates.” He nods at Robert. "They always make everything better."

While Robert goes to the kitchen, Aaron takes his place, tucking the blanket back in around his son.

"There, you’re much warmer now hey?” They sit in silence, the only noise from the TV and Robert moving about behind them.

"Here we are! Three hot chocolates with extra marshmallows." Robert sits so Seb is tucked between them. "You want to talk yet mate?" Seb shakes his head.

"You know when we first moved into this house it felt really strange." Robert stares at him, obviously wondering what he's trying to say. "There were all these new noises and it was a new bed, and it was all just a bit strange.' '

"My room is too dark. It's scary," Seb all but whispers.

"Even with your nightlight?” He nods. "In that case I reckon we should go shopping to find a better one."

"We can do that. Listen Seb, I know you’re missing your Mum and Aaron and I probably don't do things the way she would but you can't run off like you did. We were really scared. "

"You were?"

"Yeah. We love you so much."

"You didn't come and see me." Robert looks at Aaron over Seb's head. It’d been years before, when he was tiny after he’d first gone with her and Ross. They didn’t even know he remembered any of it, he’d never mentioned it before. "Moses said it was 'cos you didn't like me."

"Oh mate, no. I promise you. Me and your Mum...we weren't always friends and we had a bit of a row when you were really little, but I promise me and Aaron never stopped missing you.”

"That's right. It just took a while to make friends again that's all, but it was all sorted out and you were getting used to staying here sometimes weren’t you?” It sounds so simple put that way, nowhere near to amount of hurt they'd suffered when Rebecca had refused them access until they could convince a court that the things she'd said weren't true. Too many times he'd found Robert in tears at missing him. For all he made nice with her Aaron had never forgiven Rebecca for that even if it had been sorted out pretty quickly, it had felt like years without him.

"I miss Mummy."

"I know you do bug. I wish we could make it better, really I do."

"Listen to me a minute mate, when I was little my Mummy died too and I was really sad too." Aaron itched to hold Robert, knew how much it hurt talking about Sarah. "But it helped to think about all the fun things we used to do together. Do you want to do that?"

"Yeah."

"How about we write them down, then you can look at them whenever you want. I bet Aunty Liv has loads of nice notebooks somewhere we can use." Seb nods. "I'll go and find it. Daddy can find a nice pen. He has far too many" He was pleased to see Seb giggle a bit at that, he was always teasing Robert for having hundreds of pens everywhere.

"That's a great idea. That'll be something really lovely to look back on. we can put photos in two of you want. You go upstairs and fetch the box and we'll get started."

When they’ve got what they were searching for and are waiting for Seb, Robert turns to Aaron. "Are you sure about this?”

“I think it’ll help him. Mum suggested it. You know they had that memory box for Grace, she said it helped them.”

“Yeah, but that’s not what I meant. I mean you doing this with him, listening to stuff about her.”

"She's his Mum."

"You know what I mean."

"It's fine. Promise.” He squeezes Robert’s hand as Seb runs back down the stairs. “I told Mum we’d go for tea after, is that alright bug?”

“For chips?”

“If you insist. Right then, where do you want to start?”

They’re sat there for two hours before Seb declares he’s done. They’ve written down everything he’s said and they’ve looked through all the photos he has, the little bits and pieces that means something to him. There’d been tears, laughs and gradually Aaron had seen Robert start to calm down. Ever since he’d received the call to say Rebecca had been killed he’d been feeling guilty, had been wound too tight and nothing Aaron could say would help. He’d thrown himself into making everything perfect.

“Did it help bug? Because if not we can think of something else, or if you want to talk to someone, someone who isn’t me or Daddy, we can sort that too. You just have to tell us.”

“Ok. Can I put this in my room? Somewhere special.”

“Yeah.” Robert forces out. “Of course. Off you go, then we’ll go to the pub and find the others.”

When he’s gone Aaron turns to him. “Are you alright?”

“Yeah.”

“Tell your face then.”

“I’m just…how do we know we’re doing the right thing?”

“We don’t. All we can do is try our best. Like I told him, he can talk to someone else if he wants. We can find him someone, some help. But…you need to calm down, he’s going to pick up on your worry.”

“I know it’s just…” He checks Seb can’t hear. “When he says stuff like he did, it makes me hate her all over again, but I can’t let him see that.”

“So talk to me, rant at me, or Vic, or if you want, a therapist. She kept him from us, that’s not changed because she died. I’m just as angry, but it’s not going to help him. All we can do is make sure he knows we love him, that we’ve always loved him. We have to make sure Ben and Ella know that too yeah, because we can’t neglect them to focus on Seb.”

“I…” He sees his face, the horror that he might’ve done exactly that without knowing.

“We haven’t…I’m just saying, it’s easy done, and we can’t.”

“How are you so sensible?”

“Common sense ain’t it. We’ll get through this and he’ll be the happiest little boy in the world.”

“Yeah. I couldn’t do this without you, you know that don’t you?”

“Course you could, but you don’t have to. I’m going nowhere.”

“Daddy! I put it next to my bed so Mummy’s always close.” Robert plasters on a smile and gets up to hug him.

“That’s a brilliant idea mate. Right, shall we go to the pub and see if your brother and sister have sent Nana Chas grey?” Seb nods, laughing as Robert tickles him, carrying him out the door, Aaron following on shaking his head at his boys.

[softlass27]

an ibhfc version of emmerdale's first pride (plus another one in the future) to make up for this week's upcoming episodes with aaron and the village's resident kayaking creep

AO3 link here

Pride 2021

“Right, that’ll be £7.99, please.” Victoria pushed Aaron’s lunch towards him.

“Cheers.”

“Oh, almost forgot!” She grabbed a brightly-coloured collection tin that was sitting on the end of the counter. “We’re taking donations for the Pride festival if you’ve got any spare change?”

Aaron frowned. “What Pride festival?”

“Oh, didn’t you hear? Charles is organising it.”

“In the village?”

“Yeah, he says it’s mad that we’ve not had one before. Apparently it was always a big event at his last parish. He’s not wrong, really, it’s about time we did more than your mum sticking a bit of multi-coloured bunting up behind the pub each June.”

“Huh.”

“Think you’ll go? It’s next weekend.”

“I – ”

“From what Charles and Ethan said, it should be fun,” Vic spoke over him, hands waving animatedly. “There’s music, food and games, all sorts! It’s family-friendly too, so you can bring Seb. We can go together if you want? I was planning on meeting up with Matty and Amy but – ”

“Vic, stop for breath would ya?” Aaron huffed a laugh. “Yeah, I'm up for it.”

*

On the morning of the festival, Victoria let herself into Mulberry Cottage and cast an appraising look over Aaron. He shuffled uncomfortably.

“What?”

She gave a quick wave to Seb, who was sitting on the sofa, and looked Aaron up and down again. “That’s what you’re wearing, is it?”

He glanced down at his black t-shirt and jeans. “What’s wrong with it?”

“Nothing! Except, well, it’s not very colourful is it?”

“You’ve known me, what, 13 years? When have you ever seen me do colourful?”

“But it’s Pride!”

“So?”

“Oh come on, you have to get into the spirit of it. Speaking of which – ” She rummaged in her oversized handbag and pulled out a small, light blue article of clothing, passing it over. “I saw this in town and I couldn’t resist.”

As Aaron unfolded it, he realised it was a child-sized pair of dungarees with a bright rainbow stitched across the chest. His mouth quirked upwards.

“Alright, that’s pretty cute.”

“I know, right? Should’ve got something for you too, you big grump.”

The retort Aaron was about to give her was cut off when he felt tug on his trousers and looked down to see Seb standing next to him.

“Is that for me?” He asked, looking at the dungarees with curiosity.

“Yep, Auntie Vic got them for you to wear to Pride today. What d’you say?”

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome, sweetheart. You’d better hurry and get ready, though, or we’ll be late!”

Seb grabbed Aaron’s hand and started tugging him towards the stairs. “Daddy, come on!”

Although he was a little young to quite get what Pride was all about, he’d been full of beans about the whole thing ever since Aaron had told him they were going to a party, especially once he’d found out Isaac and Dotty would be there, too.

“Alright, let’s get you changed.” He looked back at Vic and rolled his eyes. “I’ll get changed, too.”

She grinned at him.

*

“Did you and Robert ever go to Pride?” Vic quietly asked as the four of them made their way to the field where the festival was being held, Seb in his new dungarees and Aaron in the one green t-shirt owned (“It’s a colour that’s on the flag, Vic, that’s as good as you’re getting.”)

“Nah.” Aaron shook his head. “Never got round to it. We used to talk about maybe going to the one in Leeds or something, but somethin’ always came up. Then we'd always say we’d go the next year but… ”

But we ran out of years.

“Yeah.” Vic’s face fell a little and she squeezed Aaron’s hand lightly. “But we’ll have a nice time, won’t we?”

“Daddy, there’s music!” Seb called from where he was walking just in front of them. They could indeed hear the sound of upbeat pop music blasting through a speaker as they got closer to the festival. “Hurry!”

“Coming, mate.” Aaron called after his retreating back, smiling at his enthusiasm. He sighed and squeezed Vic’s hand in return. “Yeah, we’ll have a good time.”

*

Considering Emmerdale’s tiny size, the village’s first Pride event had a pretty good turnout. The festival was full of so much colour and noise that Aaron ended up hoisting Seb up on his hip, slightly wary of losing track of him in among the chaos. The three of them wandered around for a while, taking in the party-like atmosphere and watching Charles and Ethan both make heartfelt speeches on the small stage that had been set up.

At some point Marlon called Victoria's name and she went over to catch up with him and April, leaving Aaron and Seb to carry on exploring alone. The little boy seemed to love it so far, taking in the sights and sounds with increasing delight.

“You wanna get your face painted? Aaron asked, pointing to a tent where Matty and Amy were emerging hand in hand, both of them covered in body paint.

Seb clapped his hands enthusiastically. “Yeah!”

They made their way inside and sat across from a girl who looked barely 20 and was covered head to toe in paint and glitter.

“Hello.” She smiled brightly at Seb, who predictably turned under the attention bashful and tucked himself against Aaron’s chest. She tilted her head down to catch his eye. “What’s your name?”

“Seb.”

“Nice to meet you, Seb, I’m Freya. Do you want some rainbows?”

Seb nodded shyly and sat as still as a three year-old could while she carefully painted a small pride flag on each of his cheeks, Aaron holding his waist to stop him from squirming too much under the tickle of the brush.

“There, all done.” She brandished her brush towards Aaron. “Are we doing your face as well?”

“Uh, no thanks.”

“Yes.” Seb smacked a palm on Aaron’s cheek enthusiastically. “Rainbows for you, too!”

Aaron sighed. The things he did for his son.

“Alright. Do your worst.”

When they emerged from the tent five minutes later and bumped into Vic again, her eyes lit up with glee.

“Aaron Dingle with glitter on his face.” She fumbled frantically for her phone. “Don’t move, I need a photo.”

“No, don’t – ”

“Moira!” Vic ignored him and called over his shoulder. “Both of them, can you believe it?”

Aaron turned around to see Moira coming towards them with Cain just behind her – Cain whose cheek was adorned with a rainbow flag identical to Aaron’s. He let out a snort that had Cain’s eyes narrowing dangerously at him.

“Not a word out of ya.”

“Wow, how’d they get you?”

“This one made me.” Cain gestured to Isaac, who dropped his hand to run towards Seb, the two of them immediately chasing each other in circles around the adults' legs.

“Come on, you two!” Moira was stood next to Vic, both their phones held up. “Smile!”

Neither of them smiled, but they let them take a couple of snaps.

“Perfect,” Moria smirked down at her screen and turned the phone so Aaron could see a photo of himself and Cain both with matching scowls and rainbows on their faces. “This one’s going on the fridge.”

*

“You have fun today?” Aaron asked Seb as he carried him home.

Seb’s arms were wrapped loosely around Aaron’s neck and he could barely keep his eyes open, exhausted like most of the other kids in the village. The daytime part of the festival was over, only the child-free people sticking around into the night to keep drinking and dancing.

“Mhm,” Seb hummed tiredly, head flopping around on Aaron’s shoulder. “C’n we do it again?”

“If they do another one next year, then yeah. We can go again.”

He unlocked the door to Mulberry Cottage one-handed, depositing Seb on the sofa and carefully easing his shoes off. He glanced at the photos on the mantlepiece, Robert’s smiling face looking back at him. Aaron straightened up and moved to stand in front of them, adjusting one of the frames slightly.

“Finally went to Pride,” he said quietly. “Can you believe it?”

Just wish you could’ve come with me.

****

Pride 2025

“Morning!” Vic let herself into Mulberry Cottage, Harry in tow. “Happy Pride.”

“Happy Pride!” Seb shouted back from where he was fiddling with Molly’s rainbow-coloured leash (a purchase he’d talked Aaron into making from one of the stalls the previous year).

“Hiya.” Aaron jogged down the stairs. “Thought you’d be goin' with Ryan this year. He’s got the girls, right?”

“Yeah, we're spending the day together but I told him that me and Harry would meet him there. Us lot always go to Pride together, I’m not breaking tradition now.” She gave Aaron’s blue jeans and red t-shirt an approving nod. “Wow, red and blue this year. Really pushing the boat out.”

“Shut up, you.”

“Where’s that brother of mine?”

“He was just dropping some stuff from the cafe off at the festival, cakes and sandwiches an’ that. Said he’d come back before we set off, though.”

“Well he’d better hurry himself up, I don’t wanna miss whoever Ethan’s got opening the festival this year. And it’s Robert's first one, we can’t be late!”

“Alright, keep your hair on.” Robert appeared in the doorway, nudging past her to come inside. “You can’t be late to a festival, Vic, they’re sort of all day things.”

“You get the food sorted alright?” Aaron asked, shoving his wallet and phone into his pockets.

“Yeah, Jimmy and Nicola are all set up. They’ve roped Angelica into helping out, poor kid.” Robert ruffled Harry's hair before grabbing a bottle of suncream from the coffee table and kneeling down in front of Seb. “Right, suncream on then we can go.”

“I can do it myself,” Seb protested, batting Robert’s hands away from his face.

“Hm. See, I believed you when you said that at the beach the other weekend and we ended up coming home with you looking like a lobster. Keep still.”

Seb sighed and let Robert rub suncream all over him with only a bit of squirming, giggling when Robert finished by poking him sharply in the ribs.

“Dad, not on my t-shirt!” He said, smoothing a protective hand over his new rainbow-striped top. “Don’t get it dirty.”

“Alright, you big fusspot,” Robert teased, kissing him on the head and rising to his feet.

“Leave him alone, you’re no better,” Vic said with a tut. “Right, come on. Chop chop!”

She opened the door to let both Seb and Harry run outside, following closely behind them. Aaron picked up Molly’s leash and held out a hand to Robert.

“Ready?”

Robert grinned and took it.

“Let’s do it.”

*

The thing about Charles and Ethan was, they always had to one-up themselves. Aaron had no idea how they did it, but every year they somehow managed to increase their budget enough to make Emmerdale Pride bigger and better until now, four years on, the first festival they held looked tiny in comparison. Huge crowds of people swarmed the village, taking in the countless stalls, games, music, drag acts and and live bands playing all day. There were even a few rides this year.

As they made their way through the madness, Aaron gave Robert a quick nudge.

“Okay?”

They were only in the village and they knew a lot of the people there, but there were still some days where Robert and large crowds didn’t mix well. Thankfully, it seemed that today wasn't one of those days, as Robert shot him a small smile and nodded.

“I’m good.”

“Dads!” Seb shouted, running back to tug both their hands. “Can we do the face-painting first?”

Robert let out a mock groan. “Do I have to?”

“If I’m not getting out of it, neither are you,” Aaron muttered.

“Doesn’t have to be rainbows,” Seb said to Robert, shrugging matter-of-factly. “You can get the bisexual colours if you want?”

Aaron watched Robert’s eyes widen ever-so slightly in surprise, before he nodded and let Seb lead him towards to the face-painting tent.

*

After a few hours of exploring and mingling with the other villagers, Aaron and Robert collapsed with a couple of pints at one of the picnic tables, both of them in need of a breather. They’d picked a spot in the shade, keeping half an eye on Seb playing with a group of other kids while they listened to the band currently playing on the stage. Molly drank from the bowl of water they’d put down on the grass for her, before jumping up into Robert’s lap.

After sitting in comfortable silence for a few minutes, Aaron took a long, cooling gulp of his pint and looked away from Seb to glance at Robert. His husband was absently stroking Molly, watching the festival with a slightly pensive look on his face that made Aaron’s brow furrow.

“You alright?”

Robert blinked and turned to look at him. “Yeah, I’m fine.”

“If you're tired, we can go home, y'know.”

Robert gave him a reassuring squeeze on the wrist. “I know. Honestly, it's nothing, just... ” He trailed off and stared once more at the festivities around them. “Could you ever have imagined anythin’ like this in the village when we were growing up?”

That was an easy question to answer.

“No.”

Aaron knew for a fact that the teenage version of him would have never imagined in his wildest dreams seeing the village transformed this way, decked out in bright colours, full of people like him, every resident open and accepting. And he knew the idea would’ve seemed even less likely when Robert was a teenager.

“Bet your dad’s rolling in his grave.”

Robert barked a surprised laugh. “Yeah, probably.”

They watched the party for another couple of minutes, then Robert nodded towards where Seb was tackling Dotty in an overly-enthusiastic game of tag.

“I’m glad that he gets to grow up in this version of the village,” he said softly. “Whether he turns out to be straight or gay or bi – whatever – I don’t want him to ever be scared of being different, like you an’ me were back in the day.”

“Don’t say ‘back in the day’, makes us sound ancient.”

“Well if you keep complaining about your back aching every time we – ”

“Oi!” Aaron gave his shoulder a punch, before trailing his hand down his arm to link their fingers together as they both watched Seb. “Yeah, me too. It is different for him, he knows he can be whoever he wants here. No one’s gonna have a go at him over who he does or doesn’t fancy. And he knows we love him no matter what.”

“Course he does.”

Robert grinned warmly at him and leaned across the table to press his lips to Aaron’s. The two of them kissed lazily until Molly jumped up between them to lick at both their chins and they broke away with a laugh.

“Can't go more than five minutes without needing attention, can you?” Robert pulled her back into his lap, scratching her behind the ears until she settled again. The pink, purple and blue stripes on his face were smudged from where Aaron’s thumb had just rubbed over his cheekbone.

“Sounds like someone I know.”

“Piss off.”

Aaron drained the last of his pint and put the glass to one side, resting his elbows on the table. “Good first Pride, then?”

“Great first Pride.” Robert quirked an eyebrow at him. “It’ll be even better if we carrying on celebrating at home. Y’know, once the kid’s in bed.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Think we've got a bottle of champers in the fridge; I say we crack that open, take it upstairs and then – ”

“Daddy!” Seb ran up to them, grabbing Aaron’s elbow with a pleading look in his eyes. “Can we go on the dodgems? Isaac says him and Uncle Cain are going on.”

Aaron groaned and stretched his arms over his head. “Right now?”

“Yeah, we have to get them!”

Aaron huffed a laugh and dropped his arms. “Well in that case.” He paused and turned to Robert. “Unless you’d rather have a go?”

Robert shook his head rapidly. “Nah, me and Molly are good here, we'll save the table. Go crash some cars, boy racer.”

“Come on, then.”

As they headed in the direction of the bumper cars, Aaron looked back to see Vic appearing at Robert’s side, looking a little tipsy as she sat down next to him. By the time they were standing in the queue for the ride with Cain and Isaac, he could see the Sugden siblings had been joined by Ryan and his girls, plus Diane and Harry, all of them piling onto the table and surrounding them. Robert was laughing at something Ryan was saying, eyes crinkling. When he saw Aaron watching, he shot him a small wave. He looked happy and content, and the sight of it made something warm settle in Aaron's chest.

It wasn't his first Pride, but it was the best one he'd had so far.

“Dad,” Seb piped up, grabbing his attention. “It's our turn”

“Alright, let’s show Cain and Isaac how it's done.”

[scrapyardboyfriends]

I was trying to have a civilized discussion earlier with another fan about how Seb was Aaron's son only in the mind of a handful robron fans and not from the perspective of the producers or the general audience. I want to talk about it calmly without my robron glasses on. The show was never invested in an Aaron-Seb fatherhood storyline and the fact that Seb disappeared the moment his biological parents left the show is the biggest proof. Aaron is not considered to be a father. That's just a fact, sadly.

What a controversial ask anon. Hahaha. I feel like no matter how I answer this I will offend someone. Let’s try and tread carefully.

I mean...I think you’re both reading too far into this and also making it really simplistic. 

Now, I don’t know what Iain’s original intention was with Seb but I do know that Kate/Laura/Jane finished out that story after they came in so it’s really hard to even say what the intention ever was. Plus we don’t really know if Emily decided to leave on her own or if they wrote her out. 

I think that for those 8 months that Seb lived with robron, that Seb was in fact Aaron’s son. I think they showed the minimum of him coming around to Seb being in his life and he came to love him and we saw moments of them bonding and we saw how upset he was when Rebecca wanted to take Seb away. And Robert got to reiterate just how great of a dad Aaron was. So just because Seb didn’t end up staying with Aaron after Robert left, doesn’t mean that Seb wasn’t his son in those months. 

It also doesn’t mean that Aaron “isn’t a father” or whatever. Does he currently have a child on the show right now that lives with him? No. Will we ever see Seb again? Who knows what future producers might decide to do. 

It’s also all subjective when you’re talking to people. If people feel like Aaron was and is Seb’s dad regardless of whether or not this child is still on the show, the guess what? They get to feel that way. If you want to believe that he’s not, then sure, you do you anon. It literally doesn’t matter. 

Do I, personally, think they did a great job with Aaron and Seb while he was on the show? Not really. They had some good and cute moments but there were plenty of missed opportunities. But I also feel the exact same way about Robert and Seb. I don’t think they did great with either of them and fatherhood when it came to Seb, not really. Or in any case, they could have done a lot more and a lot better. But it was what it was and if people want to still appreciate it and talk about it and write about it and draw it and let Seb be expanded upon in the transformative universe, then that’s what they’ll do. And no amount of you coming into people’s inboxes to argue the opposite is going to change that. 

Back to current Aaron, does the show currently see him as a father? Probably not. Might they mention the fact that he was a good dad to Seb once upon a time if he ever attempts to acquire a child in the future? Perhaps. We don’t know. 

But I can’t stress enough how much it literally doesn’t matter. If people wish Aaron would get his son back? Let them. If people want Aaron to have another child in the future and get the fatherhood story he “deserves”, then...let them. 

I personally would have loved for Aaron to get the single fatherhood story with Seb because I think it would have been great for his character because it would have allowed him to stay in that more grown up space he occupied while married to Robert and it would have given him a constant tie to Robert. And it would have been a less traveled narrative for him. There’s a reason it’s so popular in fic. While I would still absolutely take it, I do feel like they’re running out of time to do it though. And if they wanted to give him any kind of new fatherhood story, as I said before, I’d rather he foster and get a cute precocious child to interact with right away without the hassle of a surrogacy story. 

Okay...this is far too much rambling anon. I don’t think you’re totally wrong but I also think it doesn’t matter and I don’t know why you’re so insistent to prove this argument.  

[susieskinner93]

Robert Sugden Week 2020

Day 3  - Family 

“Oi careful!” – hissed Aaron. Robert came down the stairs with too much noise and if little Tommy would wake up right now that would be a disaster.

“Sorry.” – mouthed Robert as he tiptoed closer. The toddler was fast asleep next to Aaron on the sofa, with a blanket around him, and they knew they should’ve taken him upstairs, but to be honest Aaron got lost just staring at him.

“He’s perfect, right?” – he smiled looking at Robert who was standing behind the sofa staring down at them.

“Yeah, he looks exactly like Seb. You remember?” – he asked with a soft chuckle.

“I know, he clung to us the same way Tommy does now.”

“What time did they say they were due back?” – asked Robert whispering before he went to the kitchen to get a glass of water.

“Around 9-ish I think.” – said Aaron trying to remember the exact date.

“Wouldn’t it be better if we’d have him until tomorrow?” – asked Robert wondering – “I mean I don’t want them cutting their holiday short just because they have to get back on time.”

“Good idea, and we could take him to Hotten that way. You remember how much Seb loved the pool when he was this tiny? And we brought Tommy there last year, I think he’d like that.” – agreed Aaron.

“Okay, I’m gonna call them then.” – said Robert smiling before he pulled out his phone. He went back upstairs to not disturb the little boy, but 5 minutes later he was back down, signaling Aaron to follow him to the kitchen.

“So?”

“They thanked us, and said we’re the best granddads ever.” – laughed Robert.

“I have to agree.” – smiled Aaron. – “God we do spoil him, don’t we?” – he asked looking at the sleeping child.

“Course we do, he’s our first grandson, it’s our job to spoil him.” – grinned Robert.

“You know I can’t even imagine what we’re gonna do when the rest of them start having their own family.”

“No, I’m not ready to think about that yet.” – agreed Robert. – "They are still kids.”

“It’s weird though, innit?” – asked Aaron out of the blue while they were still sitting at the kitchen table.

“What’s weird?”

“Us… being granddads.”

“I don’t know… is it really?”  - asked back Robert.

“Yeah, I’m only 47 and I already have an almost 2-year-old grandchild.” – laughed Aaron. – “And our youngest is only 7. It’s madness.”

“I know. And I’m sorry it took us that long to… expand the family… that’s on me.” – said Robert not meeting Aaron’s gaze. They both knew he was talking about prison.

“No, Robert.” – started Aaron as he reached out to touch his hand – “I didn’t say this to…”

“I know…. but still.”

“Yeah, but you didn’t plan Seb making us grandparents when he was only 20.”

“Yeah that’s right, but he was always…. I don’t know… so grown up.” – said Robert remembering. – “Like when the twins were born and he went full-on protective mode. Do you remember?” – he asked laughing.

“Yeah, he actually chased Mandy down the street with a broomstick.”

“Yeah and later with Abi… I’ve always had that feeling that he was… the mature one.”

“But did you expect him to get married at 20?”

“No, not that.” – laughed Robert. - “But they wanted a kid so bad, and it’s not as hard as it was for us all those years ago.” – he shrugged before they heard a tiny voice coming from the sofa. Tommy woke up, sitting up slowly, looking for his granddads already.

“Hey, sleepyhead.” – smiled Aaron sitting beside him, stroking his hair lightly.

“D’ya want a milkshake?” – asked Robert and Tommy’s eyes lit up. He was familiar with the Sugden- Dingle treatment. He was only gonna be 2 in 3 weeks but he already figured out that he can get everything he wanted when he was with his granddads.

“And scuits.” – he grinned at Robert.

“You want biscuits with it?” – asked Aaron. Tommy only nodded. Yes, they definitely spoiled him rotten. They fucked up every rule for him. Everything that was forbidden for their own kids, it was allowed for Tommy… they tried to tone it down, but having a grandkid was an entirely different feeling than having kids.

“Daddy!” – shouted Abi from upstairs. – “Can you plait my hair?” – she asked halfway down the stairs.

“Okay, I’ll make Tommy’s drink, and you go deal with the princess.” – smirked Aaron. They both knew Robert was better at doing hair. He was quite good, and secretly Aaron envied him.

“Alright, can I trust the two of you not to make a mess of the living room by the time I come back?” – he asked and look at mainly Tommy. The boy only grinned at him, with that mischievous smile that made Robert think he was looking at Seb for a second. Father and son looked so much alike. He just smiled to himself while he ran upstairs to help Abi.

“He’s gone.” – said Aaron making Tommy look at him. – “What do you think? Should we build a pillow fort while he’s gone?” – he asked winking at him. Tommy didn’t really need any persuasion. He climbed off the sofa and started throwing around the pillows into a pile in the middle of the room. Aaron laughed at him while he quickly went to the kitchen to make his drink. With the twins camping with Paddy and Evie in the woods, and Abi being occupied with her barbie dolls upstairs, it was refreshing to do something that he and Robert did with Seb back in the days. It reminded Aaron of the good times. The times before everything went bad for a while. And it was all good now, but he always felt like something was missing when Robert was gone. He knew how hard Robert tried to make it up to him. He knew that having Abi was more of his benefit because he told Robert over and over again how much he’d want another baby. Their life got back on track and he was grateful for that. But still. Building a pillow fort with your grandson and waiting for your husband to figure it out that he was being left out… again, then laugh in his face? Yeah, Aaron didn’t think he’d get tired of doing that.

[robronwriter]

It’s you and me

I wrote a thing with my brain and my hands

Aaron is staring at himself in the mirror. It’s the same mirror, in the same pub, whilst wearing the same suit. He isn’t entirely sure why he is even doing this, but he’s going through the motions that his entire family, his friends and the entire village said that he should move on. That this is what Robert would have wanted, he has a son to raise and the kid deserves the best. Seb’s screeching of joy can be heard from downstairs and Aaron’s sure that he’s been causing damage in the cupcakes for the wedding. It doesn’t matter now. He’s not sad, he’s not happy he just exists through this state of “you have to move on love, you have to live your life and raise Seb, and help Liv through university”. He has to get married today. Even though he didn’t want to date, even though he didn’t want to get into a serious relationship, get engaged and get married. He’s wondering if he allowed this thing to move too far away from his control.

As he steps out from the pub Seb comes crashing into his leg with a power a 6 year old child shouldn’t possess. He’s tall for his age, blonde with wild curls that are a bit messy right now because he doesn’t really let Aaron comb them all the time, and John, Aaron’s future husband, isn’t allowed to touch his hair at any moment as per Seb commands.

“Easy on the cupcakes, thief”, even though it’s too late for that, Aaron knows.

“Daddy, I only had one!” Seb held his index finger up as he giggled and ran away.

“Sure you did, sweet tooth” Aaron sort of said that into the void, more talking to Robert than to Seb. Robert left a big hole in his life, even though his family is acting like Robert never existed, Aaron still carries a piece of him wherever he goes. He’s the only one who knows the truth about Robert, and every time people act like his existence has been erased from history, it’s difficult to hold back. It happened not even a year into their marriage, but Robert did it to protect them and the people he loves. The idea was Aaron’s himself, but he started saying it more as a joke than an actual suggestion, but the obsessive nature of Robert took over that idea and he couldn’t stop it anymore.

Next thing he knows he’s walking down the altar, Chas on his arm, thinking about having to bury an empty coffin and pretend for years that Robert is no more. He’s felt angry, he’s felt betrayed, he’s felt abandoned and each time he’d look at Seb who was barely starting to walk, he felt anger for that kid. And he felt love, above everything else, he felt love. He felt a neverending river of love for Robert the traitor, that couldn’t be drained not even as he’s smiling walking down the aisle, with a perfectly good man smiling at him prepared to take on his child and start their own little family.

Read More on AO3

[chaossmagic]

robron celebrating their anniversary and time off-screen until we see them next? Please

Seb was fast asleep in the car all tuckered out, ice cream smeared all round his mouth and his favourite teddy clasped in one sticky fist. They’d decided to head to Whitby for the day, just the three of them, wanting a bit of quiet family time on their special day.

Their anniversary. Their first.

Given the circumstances, they’d almost forgone doing anything at all, but a hushed conversation in between soft kisses as the sun came through the curtains convinced them that no, they needed this. It was still a big deal, one year of marriage, and it was only right that they celebrate.

And it turned out that Robert had already got one step ahead of Aaron anyway, an enormous bunch of roses on the kitchen table when they arrived downstairs, Robert beaming as Aaron read the little card tucked in amongst the blooms; I love you always, R xxx

He’d kissed him then, harder than he should have with both Liv and Seb present, and buried his face in his husband’s neck to hide the tears that he most certainly would have gotten stick for.

(His own gift, a navy silk tie, he’d handed over when they’d reached Whitby Bay, Aaron muttering about Robert’s expensive taste but secretly thrilled that he could spoil him like this, just once. That time, it had been Robert’s turn to kiss him hard, Seb’s babbles from the back seat the only thing that alerted them to the fact that they probably shouldn’t get too carried away in broad daylight.)

They’d strolled along the beach hand-in-hand, Seb wobbling on the sand and shrieking in delight at all the pebbles and shells he found, and when they’d found a clear patch to sit down on, Aaron had helped Seb make sandcastles while Robert watched with a smile that seemed etched onto his face permanently. 

Some might say that it was no way to spend a first anniversary, that they should have been at home, doing other things without kids or family involved. And Robert had promised him that yes, they would do that, later, after Seb had gone to bed, a bottle of wine already chilling in the fridge for them to take up to bed for a re-enactment of their wedding night, which had only made Aaron fall in love with him even more.

Which he didn’t think was possible. 

“God, he’s dead to the world back there,” Aaron commented, jerking his head in Seb’s direction. “You don’t think we overdid it with him, do you?”

“Course not,” Robert disagreed, scrubbing a hand over his face. “I’m pretty knackered myself, to be honest.”

“You better not be too tired,” Aaron said, a smirk forming on his lips, “because I was under the impression we were going to do somethin’ not child-friendly later, at home, in our bed...”

“Careful, Mr Dingle, there’s a child present,” Robert said lowly, leaning in to press a soft kiss to Aaron’s mouth. He grinned, relishing the taste of him, chocolate and vanilla and strawberry sauce. 

“That’s Sugden-Dingle, actually,” Aaron countered. He laced Robert’s fingers with his, taking in the shining face of Robert’s watch, the one he’d given back to him on this day a year ago. “I can’t believe I’ve been lucky enough to call you my husband for a whole year. Mad, innit?”

“I’m the lucky one,” Robert protested. “You’ve stood by me through everything, and these last few months....you said in your speech last year, d’you remember, about how when times were hard I was there to get you through them?” He looked to Aaron for confirmation, who nodded. “Well, these last months have been unbearable for me sometimes, and yet you’re still here. You do it for me too, y’know. Make stuff better.”

“Soppy git,” Aaron said - but he was smiling, rubbing at his eyes where they had become wet. “C’mon, my muppet husband, let’s go home.”

“Whatever you say,” Robert said as he started the car, smiling. “Husband.”

[spamela-hamderson]

Another reasonable blog i will kindly harass with my annoying question about how the show wrote robert/rebecca/seb and aaron as a seperate existance. Did you ever feel threatened weird or sad watching 2018? Wondering why Robert is crying and caring a whole lot about her even when aaron said him and robert are enough for seb? You kno what i mean i feel so yeah what were your feeling since you too say enjoyed seb?/:

Before you read on, I just want to apologise for the mess this has turned into. I cannot for the life of me organise my thoughts so who knows if I’ve even managed to answer your question here.

Hmmm ok so I only found/got into robron’s story around June/July of 2018, so it’s important to note that a big part of why I’m so unbothered by the r2+seb thing might just be because I didn’t live through it in real time?

Following a soap in real time while being involved in fandom is a whole other experience to flying through years of storyline on my own, in a couple of weeks. Many of the people who still have insecurities about r2+seb (sorry i keep using this btw, it’s just much quicker) or have felt uncomfortable with it for a long time, had to sit through weeks of sensationalised spoilers, fandom wars, 56 000 words of meta about how awful everything is and how Robert would leave Aaron for Rebecca or had actual feelings for Rebecca in 2017, and it’s normal that all of that would also inform your viewing of the actual events that went down. It’s probably normal for those feelings to colour your perception of their relationship going into 2018 as well. 

I didn’t have to sit through the fandom analysing everything that was happening to death. Which is great, because as fun as that can be, this medium, this story, was not made to be analysed this thoroughly. A lot of the things that happen are just a means to an end. Robert being the one to freak out so much and search high and low for Rebecca made sense to me mainly cos, being a White, she didn’t have many ties to the village apart from him. Her only living family outside of the one who’d kidnapped her was her infant child. And Robert’s the kid’s dad, of course he was like um son where’s ur mum??? 

And I always saw his worry as a combined result of the massive amounts of guilt he must’ve felt about his own part in the White’s undoing (dude absorbs guilt like a sponge, and the Whites would’ve been a mess with or without Robert, but he did kinda fuck that family up lol oops) PLUS his unresolved feelings about losing his own mum in a truly horrific way.

He said it himself that he was mildly annoyed with Rebecca’s disappearance when he thought she’d only bailed on them for her party girl life, but was kinda glad she’d effed off anyway so he could play happy families with roblivionseb lolll. He was more than ready to raise Seb with Aaron sans Rebecca then.

He only properly freaked when he thought he’d have to one day tell seb his mum was brutally murdered by his serial killer cousin, like. I feel that’s quite reasonable. Especially with the whole Sarah burning in a barn while he stood helpless situation.

I don’t think Aaron being less frantic about it all meant he was ‘a separate existence’. He was just being the calmer one in this instance because Massive Guilt + Dead Mum Trauma were reasons specific to Robert. What would Aaron’s reasons be for reacting similarly in this situation? He’s not as closely tied to it, to the Whites and their never-ending drama, to Lachlan’s step-daddy issues. Aaron can only be the supportive spouse here, but that doesn’t remove him from the relationship. Why would it?

And ngl I did feel bad for Rebecca. She wanted this baby so much and she was, in my eyes at the point, basically written in as a womb for robron and then she lost all of her family, got her brain scrambled, and was kidnapped and traumatised by her nephew?? I was highkey convinced they would kill her off and then robron would wait an inappropriately short amount of time to change seb’s last name to sugden-dingle and be like ‘WHO’S REBECCA I DON’T KNOW HER  😃😃’

She’s not my favourite character because she was infuriatingly written sometimes, sure, but I didn’t feel threatened by her. Her life was waaay too sad.

[dinglesugden-af]

Rebecca and Ross could end at anytime, Ross could have flashbacks over the acid attack and relapse on drugs again, Rebecca could forget things and put Seb in danger again, have flashbacks of stuff Lachlan did on anniversaries or birthdays and struggle with her mental health again. Aaron could relapse on drugs or self harm for sure, but if he ever did Seb would still have other family members in the village to be there for him. Has Rebecca actually thought this through? She’s the one who preached how she lost her family but Seb still had one. He’ll only ever have two people in his life and that’s the two people who’ve both put their own children in danger. No matter if she’s struggling with Seb missing his dad, taking him away from the only parts he has left of him is just her cutting Robert out of his life properly and that’s the most selfish thing a person could do. She’s punishing other people because she can’t handle Seb clearly misses and wants his dad, and no matter what she thinks whenever you saw Seb with Robron together or individually compared to when you’ve seen him with her he’s always been the happiest and most chilled child you could ever see. Let’s be honest, she just can’t handle the fact that even though she’s been the main parent for Seb for over a year and even though he hasn’t seen or heard from his dad in a while he still wants his dad. As someone who lost her whole family and is living without her own dad, it’s the most selfish thing to take him away from the family he has and the only parts of his dad he’ll have till he’s a teenager.

[kellykadesperate]

Following on from your other ask, can you maybe write something where Annie finds about the worse parts of Aaron and Roberts affair, maybe from someone who doesn’t like them and it shatters this fairytale of her dads love story in her head and she thinks that they lied to her. But they reassure her. Thank you :)

a place where roses bloom 

—

Seb’s a teenager so he’s naturally annoyed that he has to have a family dinner at the pub instead of going out with his mates. He has a frown on his face which almost mirrors Aaron’s teenage look and Chas just has to comment on it when she takes their orders.

“Oh. I sense a strop coming.” 

Seb frowns. “Uh. No.” He says, he turns bright red as his nan comes forward and squeezes his cheeks. Aaron watches and only tells the to shut up when Ella starts wriggling about in his arms.

“We’ve just got her off.” Robert says, but he doesn’t care all that much because Jacob’s actually being quiet, well quieter. They’ve promised him he can spend the day with Isaac and Cain at the garage tomorrow if he behaves tonight so they’re winning really.

Jacob leans over to look at his baby sister and Annie nearly yanks him away. “She’s sleeping.” She’s five and yet the most protective child in the whole world. 

She has reasons. They all do. Because Ella was early and Chas thought the worst, it didn’t help that they’d already agreed to call her Ella Grace. There were memories, it got dark. But she made it.

And now Annie doesn’t even want to think about anything bad happening. Jacob tuts, goes to shove her and Robert just gives them this flipping work. It gets them back in their seats and Aaron runs a hand across Robert’s knee and squeezes. 

It’s a thank you, it’s a promise, he basically screams ‘later’ and Robert just throws him a smirk. 

Ella punches the air with a small fist and then shoves in it her mouth and gurgles when Robert takes her from Aaron’s arms so that he can lean over and cut Annie’s food up for her.

Robert rocks Ella slowly until he looks up and sees an old man walk in and take his hat off. He’s dressed smartly. He’s got this grey suit on and he orders cognac from Marlon before settling down on the stool. 

He looks familiar, but Robert keeps his attention down on Ella when she starts crying and he has to lift her towards his chest.

“Is she okay?” Aaron looks up, sounds panicked and maybe he always will be when it comes to her. 

“Dad she’s fine.” Seb reasons, his voice is low and he nods a little when Robert says the same thing, says she might need a bottle.

Aaron nods steadily and goes to the bar to get her bottle heated up and then Chas comes out again and asks for a hold.

“You’ll do her bottle too?” 

Chas frowns. “Robert Sugden-Dingle, I think I am capable.” She says, tuts a little as Ella is passed over to her in a little bundle. She makes all these little noises and then they all turn to hear the sound of someone slamming a drink down on the bar. 

“Everything alright there?” Marlon has his hands on his hips as he comes back through and places the bottle down. 

The man looks right at Robert. “You’re Robert Sugden?” 

Robert instantly feels uneasy around him and his eyes flicker. He goes to nod his head and Aaron’s like his personal bouncer. “Who’s asking?”

“You’re the person who killed my friend.” 

Annie lets out a bloody scream and starts crying almost immediately. She huddles into Seb’s chest who just looks stunned and waits for Robert to say something.

“What are you talking about?”

“Lawrence White? That psycho only crashed their car because you had —“

Seb instantly has tears in his eyes. He knows the story, the full story, thanks to Belle and honesty when he was old enough to understand. Now though, he’s confronted with a different sort of truth. 

Robert looks right at him. “Seb, don’t listen to him.”

Jacob looks up and asks what’s wrong and Marlon takes him out the room with Annie. “You go with uncle Marlon yeah?” Aaron says, and as soon as they’re out the room he comes towards the man and looks ready to thump him. He only turns back when Robert makes a grab for his hoodie and tells him to. 

“He’s just some old drunk.”

Aaron leans closer again and then frowns.

“You must be the scaly he went off with.” 

Seb just stands there awkwardly. “Don’t say that about my —“ Chas manages to push him out the room without alerting Ella. He doesn’t go willingly. It takes Robert telling him to watch out for Annie and Jacob for him to finally leave.

They’re thankful the pub isn’t busy because this idiot is managing to shout his mouth off in this really classy way isn’t he? 

“Poor Chrissie. They died together. Both of them, at the hands of you.” The man looks across at Robert again, points angrily and Aaron shakes his head.

“Don’t speak to him.” Aaron blurts out. 

“You better leave. This is his family’s pub.” Chas says, stokes Ella’s back and looks like she’s holding back herself. 

Robert feels wrecked suddenly, it’s been years since he was confronted with the idea that he had killed his ex wife and ex father in law. This old bastard doesn’t have the right to do this.

The man frowns. “Says Dingle on the front.” He says, then he connects the dots. “Oh you married him?” He scoffs and Aaron balls his fists.

“We said go.” Robert comes closer to where Aaron is standing and the man shakes his head.

“He said you ruined him.” Robert remembers all the lies. He remembers suffering for it.

“Yeah and he hit me with his car. I nearly died.”

“Then he might have lived.” The man counters. “But instead you get to live this cosy life with this chav and a few children who aren’t even you—“

“That’s it.” Aaron has no qualms with throwing him out himself. He picks up the idiot’s poxy hat and shoves it in his face. “Leave.”

The man seems startled. His face turns bright red as he stands and then he gulps hard and scowls. “I see you have Seb.”

“Don’t mention our Seb.” Robert says, but he cowers in a way that Aaron doesn’t. 

“Where’s Rebecca?” 

Robert looks towards Chas and sees that Seb’s hanging in the hallway, listening. It’s a sore point. Still is. 

“Get out.” Aaron says once more, only the man keeps talking directly at Robert.

“So you ruin their lives and get this family so you? You cheated on Chrissie, got Rebecca pregnant accidentally and now? Now you’re loves young dream.”

Robert is startled by how much he knows, it makes him think about how much Lawrence must have told him and how much he hurt the man. 

“I don’t want any trouble.” Robert says slowly. “I’m just enjoying a nice family meal.”

“Lawrence can’t have any more of those.”

“You wanna join him?” Aaron shouts, the veins on his neck pop out.

“Aaron.” Chas says, and Ella starts crying her eyes out. Robert leans across to get her and the man shakes his head.

“I hope you can live with your sordid selves.” He says, gets his hat back on and leaves. Aaron turns around and looks at Robert. 

“You alright?” 

Robert isn’t, in fact he feels like he’s still that stupid selfish thirty year old who messed people’s lives up. “Didn’t expect that.” He tries to joke but Aaron holds his hand for a second and just breathes against his temple. 

“Love you.” He says, and Robert knows. He says it back and then get themselves some pints whilst Chas feeds Ella for them. 

“Bloody weirdo.” Chas snipes. “He called you a chav.”

“And a scaly.” Marlon comes out of nowhere and they all just stare at him before he goes back into the kitchen. 

“Wasn’t wrong though.” Robert says, almost to himself. “Not about Aaron. About me. All I did was hurt them.” 

Aaron rolls his eyes and sighs. “You didn’t kill them.” 

“Started with Rebecca, cheating on Chrissie with her. Then you.”

“Well you’re married now.” Chas shrugs. “So it was worth it.”

“Of course it was.” Robert’s not denying that for a second. “It’s just … it was one thing after another with them.” He shakes his head. “I hurt them. With you.” He looks at Aaron. “The whole world was against us, because I was bad for you and …”

Aaron punches Robert’s arm lightly. “Where’s this all coming from?” 

Robert closes his eyes, he doesn’t really know if he’s being honest. It’s just pouring out of him and he only switches off when Seb comes back in timidly. He feels rotten, it’s his grandad they were just talking about. 

The other one he never got to see. 

“He’s gone?” Seb says, mop of blonde hair against his forehead which he runs a hand through awkwardly whilst he waits for his dads to answer him. 

“Your dad chucked him out.” Chas smiles, proper teeth and everything and only makes all the awkwardness that much clearer. “It’s all fine now.”

“What did he even want?” Seb says, Ella’s little hands reach for him and he takes her. He’s a proper pro with her and she manages to settle his nerves when Aaron eventually answers.

“He was just being daft.” He says. He shrugs and then sips at his pint. “Had a problem with your dad.”

Robert stays quiet.

“Over … Lawrence?” Seb says awkwardly. He doesn’t call him grandad, he never has, despite Rebecca referring to him like that. 

“Yeah. But don’t worry.” Aaron smiles faintly. “Bring the kids in.” He says and Seb goes willingly.

**

Jacob doesn’t say anything about it, he’s almost always in his own little world and they’re thankful that he just goes up to bed when he’s told.

Seb though, he hangs around by his dads door and watches Aaron rock Ella to sleep. 

“You don’t have to worry about anything.” Aaron says, Seb dips his head into the room and sighs. 

“Are you sure?” Seb bites his lip. “He said it was because of me.” He says, closes his eyes as he sits on the bed and Aaron reaches a hand out. 

“The crash was not your fault.” Aaron almost panics at the off chance that Seb’s going to grow up thinking that he caused his auntie and grandad to die. “We’ve been through …”

“Yeah I know it was Lachlan.” Seb speaks slowly. “But dad was … they were chasing dad down because of me.” 

“It wouldn’t have mattered if you were there or not.” Aaron says, he looks up and Robert comes out from their en suite. “Tell him.” 

Robert comes down on the bed and squeezes Seb’s shoulder. “Not one bit of it was your fault. It was Lachlan. All him okay?” Seb bites his lip and then nods a little before looking at Ella asleep in Aaron’s arms.

“You want me to put here in with Annie?” She’s got a little cot in the corner of Annie’s room, twinkly lights that she’s going to start to grab for soon. Aaron nods and passes her over gently.

Seb gets to the door before looking back at Aaron and Robert in bed. “Love you, night.” He says, ears bright red as he leaves and Robert scoffs.

“He’s so like you.”

“What?”

“Doesn’t like emotions.” Robert shrugs and Aaron frowns before pinning his husband down on the bed. 

“Uh excuse you. I say I love you every day.” Aaron hovers over him, lets his nose bump against Robert’s. 

“I love you too.” Robert whispers, and then he leans up and kisses Aaron on the mouth. It’s been a while, they haven’t been without Ella in the room for almost two weeks and it doesn’t take long for Aaron to reach for Robert belt. “Hurry up.” Robert’s voice is like gravel against Aaron’s ear as he struggles with Robert’s belt and feels his husband sliding down his joggers to get things going.

“Daddy?” Annie’s little voice is enough to get Aaron rolling off Robert and panting hard as their little girl stands there with her little nightie on. Her hair is wild and all out of place and she blinks as Robert nods at her. 

“What’s wrong?” Aaron says, he tries to calm himself down and then when he sees her pouting, he instantly becomes a worried dad again. He scopes her up and brings her to the bed. “Come on angel?” He gently strokes her cheek and she frowns.

“That man was being mean about your love.” 

She has a way with flipping words and Robert almost bursts out laughing. He would, if she didn’t look so bloody devastated. 

“He’d just had too many pints.” Aaron reasons, but it doesn’t do any good because she also managed to hear Robert going on about how he hurt Chrissie, that everyone thought that they were bad for each other. She’s heard too much and Robert feels so guilty. 

“You lied.” Her voice breaks a little.

“Darling, I’m sorry.” Robert says sensitively. “Me and daddy are happy now. Proper happy. Sometimes grown ups can be silly.” He watches Aaron smile. “You know me and daddy love each other so much.”

They’ve always told her that. When she was really little they used to talk about the two princes falling in love and getting married and she’s always loved how whimsical they made it seem. 

“Forever and ever.” Annie’s always needed more reassurance than Jacob or Seb ever did. They don’t even know where she gets it from really. Robert and Aaron both blame themselves, their own insecurities about not having stability when they were younger. They try and pour as much love as they can into her.

“Of course.” Aaron whispers, he holds Robert’s hand in his and shows her their wedding rings. “I’ve love daddy —“

“Since the moment you touched lips!”

Aaron turns bright red and Robert relishes in a story that Aaron’s cooked up. Aaron runs a hand through Annie’s hair and nods slowly. 

“Yep.” Aaron over pronounces the ‘p’ and Annie giggles. She looks happy again. Maybe they have restored her faith in true love then. He strokes her hair again slowly and smiles. “That’s all you need to know, that me and daddy are —“

“Madly in love.” Robert leans over and kisses Aaron’s cheek. Aaron blushes a little and Annie grins against it. “Okay?”

“Okay.” She whispers, slides off the bed and walks towards the door. She blows them both a kiss because she’s the cutest little girl in the world and then they’re finally alone.

Aaron leans into Robert’s chest. “Madly in love.” He mumbles, he looks up. “Still?” 

Robert frowns, looks indignant. “Duh.”

“Duh. That’s your response.” 

“Learnt from my husband of so little words.” Robert whispers down before kissing Aaron and then leaning away again. “Thanks for sticking up for me by the way.”

“Always.” Aaron says. “He was a right twat.”

“Should really be dead by now.”

“Robert.” Aaron snaps, he tuts a little and then laughs. Robert looks up at him and then kisses him breathlessly. 

“I reckon we have about twenty minutes before Ella gets up, or Jacob needs a wee and leaves the tap running. So…” Robert kisses Aaron again. “Get on with it.”

Aaron wriggles an eyebrow. “Glad to see we’re still all romantic.” He says as he disappears under the covers and makes Robert laugh.

[sugdenlovesdingle]

Robron-ified Jan 4 2021

---

“Liv hurry up, we'll miss your appointment.” Aaron stressed looking around for his keys.

“We?”

“Did you really think I was going to let you go on your own? This is a big deal.”

“I know it's a big deal, but I'm not a child. I can get the bus there. It's just the doctor telling me what I already know. And those tests were scarier.” Liv shrugged

“I'm still going with.” Aaron insisted.

Liv sighed and rolled her eyes.

“Fine.”

“Robert have you seen my keys?” Aaron asked, patting the pockets of his work jacket to look for them.

“Yeah. Here.” He held up Aaron's keys but snatched them out of his reach when Aaron tried to grab them. “I'm driving. You're too stressed out.”

“I'm fine to drive!”

“I don't care. I'm driving. Seb's at nursery, which is near the hospital so we can pick him up on the way back.”

“What if it runs late?”

“Well there are these interesting things called mobile phones, that you can use to make calls from anywhere you want at any time you want. It's great.” Robert grinned, shrugging on his jacket and stepping outside.

“Smart arse.” Aaron mumbled under his breath but followed Robert and Liv out to the car.

---

“You're not coming in with me.” Liv said to Aaron as they were waiting in the hospital corridor for her appointment.

“Why not? It's helpful to have someone else in there with you to help you remember stuff later on and ask questions you didn't think of.”

“I'll be fine. Rob tell him.”

“I don't know... He has a point.”

Liv glared at him.

“Traitor.”

A door opened and someone holding a tablet stepped out into the corridor.

“Olivia Flaherty?”

Liv stood up and walked towards the open door, only to stop and turn around when she realised her brothers weren’t behind her.

“You both might as well come in. He’ll be listening at the door anyway.”

----

“So it’s officially epilepsy then?” Vinny asked. They were in the pub, having a drink to unwind and process the information the doctor had given them.

They’d picked Seb up from nursery and all but dumped him in Aaron’s lap to give him someone to fuss over that wasn’t Liv. The little boy was happily playing with a beer mat and babbling to himself and Aaron, who managed to multi task and fuss over him and Liv.

Liv nodded.

“Yeah. They’ve given me meds but it’s going to take a while to get the dose right and stuff.”

“And she might still have a seizure while they do that so she has to take it easy.” Aaron interrupted.

“They’re not sure yet what exactly triggers the seizures so I have to try pay attention to what I do and eat as well.” Liv explained, ignoring her brother.

“I did some research, you can do a lot with homeopathic treatment too. If you don’t want to take drugs.” Vinny offered.

“What are you talking about? She’s having the proper drugs alright?”

“I can decide for myself, Aaron. I’m not a child.”

“I know. I’m just worried about you. You heard what the doctor said.”

“Yes. About my epilepsy. I have to learn to live with it. Not you.”

“Well I think it’s great that you’re so positive about it all.” Robert cut in.

Liv shrugged.

“The doctor said I could live a normal life with these drugs... I can even learn to drive if I’ve been seizure free for 12 months.” she told Vinny.

“Really? That’s great.”

“You’re not driving my car though.”

“Why? Because you’re afraid I’ll crash it?”

“Wouldn’t be the first time, would it?” Robert said, raising an eyebrow at her. “I’m going to get another drink, anyone else? My treat.”

“I have to go to the yard...” Aaron said, checking his phone. “This Connor bloke owes me money and he’s in the area now.” he got up and sat Seb down on his chair. “You stay with auntie Liv ok?”

“Don’t be home too late. We’re having a pre-birthday take away tonight.” Liv told him.

Aaron frowned.

“Why tonight and not tomorrow?”

“Because you’ll have better things to do tomorrow.”

“Like what?”

“That’s a surprise. You’ll see tomorrow.”

“I hate surprises.” Aaron said and gave Robert a questioning look.

“Don’t look at me! My plans for you are very much a you and me and an early night thing.” Robert said and slipped his hands under Aaron’s jacket as he kissed him.

“Ugh. Pack it in. Mixed company.” Liv complained and Robert just laughed as he watched Aaron leave the pub.

[rustandruin]

5 year old Seb: Why is Daddy always staring at that man and looking sad?

LOL. Anon. I had to go back and look at the context of this. But hard LOL at Robert and Aaron being apart long enough for Seb to learn how to talk and even notice and question this insanity. 

Honestly, though, that child was trying to get them back together a few months after he was born. I don’t think a Seb who can talk and notice and reason would be wasting time questioning things. He’d have a plan cooked up, where with the help of Isaac and perhaps Elliot and the rest of the King kids, he’d stage his own kidnapping. Robert would be walking about frantic with worry, and Aaron being Aaron would drop everything to help him, thus leading them to once again discuss fatherhood, how good Robert’s doing on his own as a single father, and Aaron’s dissatisfaction in his relationship with whoever he’s dating. 

Slowly, they start to rediscover their spark, when Robert kind of freaks out and Aaron pulls him into a hug. Only their almost-kiss is interrupted by Nicola who says that she saw Seb hanging out with Carl. Robert and Aaron rush over and he hugs his tiny son. But Seb wants Aaron’s cuddles too because he knows and remembers what that was like, even now. Robert tries to prise him off his ex-husband, but even he can’t deny how amazing it is to watch the man he still loves holding the son he adores, and so he invites Aaron back to Vic’s for dinner. (Yes. Even though it’s five years later, they’d still be living there. It just makes for easier childcare, and Vic would want to be closer to her nephew.) 

Seb manages to conveniently fall asleep during dinner (don’t worry, he made sure he fed himself first) and Robert and Aaron kind of try to avoid the elephant in their room, but by now poor Aaron can’t handle the sight of the man he still clearly loves being the doting dad he always knew he could be. They’d kiss, but Robert would be the one pulling away. He’d bring up Seb and Aaron’s latest boyfriend. Aaron would brush it off and tell him it doesn’t matter that today he felt like they were a real family and that he’d forgotten how easy it all could be. And how much he loves Seb. Cue another heartfelt conversation. Robert would still be hesitant, and Aaron would leave dejectedly. But then he’d return a half an hour later, newly single,  with another written list -- this time on a napkin from the Woolpack. He’d also have photos of Seb on his, because he’s been his occasional babysitter over the last few years and he’s grown quite fond of him. (Seb 100% gets all of Robert’s rudeness. He also has a tendency of leaving doors open after him. It’s a whole thing.) 

Robert would finally accept, and Aaron would happily kiss him and they’d vow to take things slowly and talk it out. Then they’d spend the rest of their night doing so. Upstairs, Seb would smile in his sleep.  

[nooneelsecomesclose17]

And I remember thinking that Christmas must have been made for us

I had this one in mind right from the start and then got stuck with it so it's not really how I imagined it but I'm still pretty pleased with it.

Day 28

(AO3 link)

Robert ambled through the village, he had nowhere to go, no one to talk to, and it was all his own fault. He knew that, he wasn’t that self unaware. He’d ruined everything, he’d let Aaron go for his own good, thinking it would be fourteen years, way too long to keep the two of them going, only to be released after two years.

Getting back to the village to find Aaron was in Scotland helping Debbie out left him with mixed feelings. He could only assume he’d found out he was coming back and taken off. He’d tried his phone but just got an out of service message. He hadn’t tried asking any of the family, the glares he’d got from Chas when he first braved the pub had said it all.

The only bright spot was reconnecting with Seb, he’d visited every weekend since he’d been released and had got Rebecca to agree that the little boy could come to him for Christmas. Vic was still in Portugal with Diane so Robert had spent the past few days making the house perfect for them both. He was determined Seb would have the best Christmas, even if Robert felt like there’d be something missing.

He’d taken to going for a long walk each day, making the most of being free, roaming through the fields he’d played in as a child, shutting out the bad memories and relishing in the good.

He’s coming back into the village when he smells it, the cloying smell of smoke, memories coming back immediately, taking him back to being fourteen again. He looks around, can’t see anything at first, it’s getting dark already, but then he spots the telltale orange glow and it sets him running. It’s the pub, there’s no mistaking it. He knows it’s closed, the shorter hours apparently Al’s idea. Robert had heard the gossip about him and Chas being at war, and part of him is amused by her finally meeting her match.

When he reaches the back door it’s locked and he’s banging on it as if his life depended on it. The fire seems to be upstairs but he doesn’t know if anyone’s inside. Pulling out his phone he dials 999.

“Fire…There’s a fire, the Woolpack, Emmerdale. I don’t know if anyone’s inside. You need to hurry.”

He should wait, he shouldn’t try and be a hero or anything, but if there’s someone inside then it’s Aaron’s family. He’d never forgive himself if anything happened to them and he’d stood outside doing nothing.

Summoning all his strength he charges at the door, shouldering it open, taking a second to shake off the pain before running upstairs.

“Chas! Paddy! Anyone home?” The backroom is empty, he can see as he runs up the stairs. The heat is unbearable as he makes it to the top but he makes himself keep going, going room by room until there’s only the main bedroom and what he guesses is Eve’s left. The fire is in the main bedroom, the smoke billowing and he knows he can’t open the door, so he rushes into the other room and stops seeing Chas in the rocking chair, seemingly asleep, Eve in her arms.

“Chas!” Nothing. He’s petrified, can’t see Eve moving and for a minute he doesn’t know what to do, he’s frozen in fear. Why is no one else helping, how can they not have noticed. “Chas! Wake up!”

Still nothing, she’s breathing he can see that much, but he knows he has to get Eve out first. Picking her up he tucks his coat around her, taking one last look at Chas he runs back down the stairs. As he reaches the back door he breathes in lungfuls of fresh air, looking up he sees Billy walking by.

“Billy! Take her.” He almost throws the little girl at him. “I don’t know if she’s breathing.”

“Slow down mate. What happened?”

“I don’t know, but Chas is still in there. Look after her.” With that he heads back inside, ignoring Billy’s calls to wait. The smoke is heavier now, and when he gets back to the stairs the fire is licking round the door. He forces himself to keep moving, ignores the screams he can hear in his head from all those years before.

Slowly he manages to carry Chas from the room and downstairs and then there’s someone helping him as he starts coughing, the cold air making it worse. He feels someone wrap a blanket round him, and then everything’s muffled.

_____

The next thing he knows someone’s shining a light in his eyes and he moves away from it, frowning.

“Mr Sugden, you’re in Hotten General. How are you feeling?”

“Tired. What happened?”

“You’re suffering from smoke inhalation but you’ll be just fine. Quite the hero I understand.” He frowns again, can’t remember and then it all comes back to him.

“Chas, Eve. Are they alright?”

“As I understand they’ll both be right as rain in a few days. Thanks to you.” He relaxes, relief washing over him. “Now, you need to rest, but there’s someone to see you, just for a few minutes mind.”

“Who?” He can’t think who it could be, maybe Cain, but he doubted if even this would put him in the man’s good books. It can’t be Vic, she wasn’t on his records as far as he knew so they wouldn’t have called her.

“Your husband…” She paused looking at him. “At least that’s what he said…should I send him away.”

“No! No, don’t, please.”

“Alright, but not for long. You need to rest.”

He sits himself up a bit more, running a hand through his hair. It’s stupid but he feels nervous. Aaron’s here, and he doesn’t know how or why but he’s here, it must mean something. Suddenly he looks up and there he is. He looks good is the first thing he thinks, his hair a little longer but not too long.

“Hi.”

“That’s all you can say?” His voice is flat, giving nothing away and Robert can’t work out if he’s mad at him or what. He can’t be if he’s here though can he?

“I don’t know what else to…”

“Do you know what it was like getting that call? That my Mum and sister were in hospital?”

“I don’t…” He didn’t understand. He’d got them out, wasn’t that a good thing.

“Then when I get here and they’re fine I’m so relieved, but then they tell me you’re here, that you’re still unconscious…” He steps further into the room, still not close enough to touch and Robert huffs in annoyance, making Aaron smile. “I thought…you saved them Robert…”

“Of course.” He couldn’t leave them could he. “Anyone would.”

“But you did. You went into a burning building for my family, and I know what that means for you. You scared me.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologise…God, you don’t have to…Oh I’m making a mess of this.” Finally he comes to sit down. “How are you?”

“I’m alright, I think they’re just keeping me in to be sure, as I’m on my own.”

“You’re not.” He coughs. “I mean…I’ll be around, I can keep an eye on you if you want to go home quicker.” He shrugs, think that’s going to be as awkward as hell. “They’re keeping Mum and Eve in a few days just to be sure so I’ll be around.”

“I thought…well, you left, thought you’d want to be off as soon as possible.”

“There’s nothing waiting on me. I told Mum I’d stay until the pub was sorted, maybe longer now Debbie’s alright, so I can help you out too.” He hates this, feeling so detached from Aaron, the conversation so stilted. It’s never been like that for them, even at their worst.

“Thought you’d done a runner when you knew I was coming back.”

“Still think a lot of yourself then.” He grins. “No, Debs was getting hassle and Cain couldn’t go so I offered. Nothing much keeping me in he village these days.”

“Oh.”

“You don’t need to hear all that now, but a bit of space helped. Like I say, I’ll help you.”

“Uh…thanks. Seb’s meant to be coming and I don’t have anything finished. The tree is in but I haven’t got anything to put on it or food or anything. God there’s so much to do.”

“Could he come over a little later, to give you more time?”

“No! No, if I do that Rebecca won’t let me have him again. It took ages to convince her to let him stay with me. He has to come over and it has to be perfect.” He can feel himself getting worked up and then Aaron’s putting a hand on his shoulder, push him back against the pillows. “It has to.”

“Alright, calm down. We’ll get everything right, don’t worry. Why don’t I go and find the doctor, see if you can leave, and then we’ll make a list of what needs doing. I can go to the shops while you rest.”

He’s gone a few minutes and Robert’s already trying to work out what needs to be done, anything to distract him from the fact that Aaron’s there. Neither of them have mentioned what had happened, the divorce or anything, but he supposed there had been other things on their mind. Surely thought it would come up in the next few days. Maybe Aaron had decided he didn’t want to mention it, had moved on with someone wherever he was living no matter what he said. Maybe Robert would have to be content with the next few days before he took off again.

“Right, you can go as long as you’ve someone looking after you and you don’t overdo it.” He winks at him and Robert smiles weakly back. “Um, I don’t know if you want to, not after everything but Mum…I reckon she’d like to see you, to say thanks and that.”

“She doesn’t have to.” He really didn’t feel up to facing the woman who’d done nothing but glare at him since he came back.

“Yeah well she wants to.” He can see it means a lot to Aaron so he nods, easing himself out of bed looking around for his clothes. “I brought you a few bits from Vic’s, your stuff reeked of smoke.”

He nods, and self consciously goes into the little bathroom to get changed and when he comes back Aaron’s holding onto his bag, so he follows him down the corridors to another side room. He can see Chas through the window, sitting by Eve’s bed, the little girl sat up and playing with some toys.

“Mum…” She looks up as Aaron opens the door and then she comes outside and immediately pulls Robert into a hug. Aaron smiles at him and disappears in the room with Eve.

“I don’t know how I’ll ever thank you Robert.” She tells him, still holding onto him.

“Anyone would’ve done it, Chas.”

“But you did. I know me and you, well, we’ve not been on good terms, but thank you.” She pulls away, both of them standing there awkwardly. “Aaron tells me you’ve got Seb for Christmas.”

“Yeah.”

“Well good, I’m glad the two of you are getting to know each other again.”

“Well…” He shrugged. “Aaron’s going to help me get everything sorted. I don’t want to let him down you know”

“You won’t. I should…get back.”

“Yeah. I, um, I’m glad you’re both ok Chas.”

“Thanks to you. I won’t forget this Robert.” He doesn’t know what to say. “You know...as much as I wish he didn’t, my boy loves the bones of you.”

“Once maybe.”

“He still does. He puts on a good front, but I can see it. Don’t mess it up this time.”

“Why are you telling me this, thought you’d want me miles away from him.”

“Once upon a time maybe, but all this...well it makes you put things into perspective.” He nods, but he’s still sure she’s wrong.

He’s just standing there when Aaron comes back and he has to wave a hand in his face to get him to move. He doesn’t say anything until they're in the car on the way home.

“I’m surprised Vic isn’t coming home to look after you.”

“I told her not to.”

“Why?”

“She’ll only fuss, and her and David, think it’s better they sort themselves out before they come home. I’ll be alright, you know, if you don’t want to do this.”

“I said I would, didn’t I?” He doesn’t look over, concentrates on the road but Robert can see the tension in his hands gripping the steering wheel.

“We all say things we don’t mean.”

“Like you when you said you’d always love me?” He sighs. “Sorry.”

“No it’s fine. I meant that, I meant every word.”

“So why’d you do it, cut me off, without even a word.”

“Because I knew you’d never let me go. You would’ve dragged yourself to the prison every month for fourteen years, to your own detriment, because you’re good Aaron, you put everyone else before yourself.”

“Unlike you.”

“If you like.” He’s too tired to argue anymore. “Look just drop me at the house, I’ll manage everything.”

“Don’t be daft. I’m not angry with you Robert, that came out wrong. I was once, would’ve gladly throttled you for a while, but I get why you did it, even if I think you’re stupid. Besides, you just saved my Mum and my sister.”

“I’m not a charity case.”

“Oh will you lighten up. I’m kidding. Now look, you’re exhausted, so let me get all your bits in for Seb, get the place nice yeah? You both deserve a brilliant Christmas.”

“What are…where are you going to be?”

“Cain’s I reckon, Mum’s going up there when they let her out.”

“Well, if you need a break, you could always call in for a drink. Seb would love to see you.”

“Doubt he knows who I am anymore.” He looks over. “That wasn’t a criticism by the way.”

“I know. He does actually, still remembers his Daddy Aaron. Think about it, no pressure.”

_____

“There. Reckon that looks alright.” Aaron says, stepping back from the tree. They’ve been decorating it all afternoon, mostly him after Aaron surrendered when he nagged him one too many times about things not being in the right place.

“It looks great. I think that’s everything. Just got to pick him up tomorrow.”

“I’ll give you a lift if you like. Mum’s not coming out until tomorrow afternoon at the earliest. I don’t think you should drive all that way on your own.”

“I can’t ask you to do that.”

“Well you're not, are you.” Robert just stares at him. “Do I honestly have to spell it out to you? I want to be with you, I want to…maybe try and see if the two of us can…not go back to how we were but maybe try again?”

“Really?”

“Yeah. Do I willingly shop two days before Christmas for just anyone?”

“Well…I thought you were being nice given I saved your mum and sister’s life.”

“Well I am, but…when I saw you lying there in that bed, I thought…I was so scared and I realised that if it had been anyone else in that fire then I never would’ve known…you could’ve died and I…”

“I didn’t, I’m fine. Hey, I’m right here aren’t I?” He risks pulling Aaron into his arms. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“Promise?”

“Yeah. Anyway, you’re the one who moved away.”

“Yeah well…I told Mum, this place hadn’t been the same since you left. But now you’re back.”

“So…”

“So, I’m back too.”

“For a few days. What happens after that?” Aaron starts laughing. “What?”

“Do you think I’d be anywhere else now you're here?”

“Oh. So you want to…”

“Yeah, I reckon we deserve another chance. Not right away, you need to have Christmas with your son, and I really should be with Mum and Eve, but after then maybe you can take me out.”

“I’m taking you out am I?”

“You don’t like the places I choose.”

“Only because I prefer somewhere that has, you know, cutlery.” He jokes, a memory coming to mind.

“One time!” Aaron laughs, remembering when he’d run out of petrol and their date ended up being a burger van by the side of the road. “I missed you.”

“Missed you too, more than you’ll ever know. I can’t believe this, half expecting to wake up in a minute back in the hospital.”

“It’s real, I promise.” With that he leans in to kiss him, arms winding round his neck, holding on dear life. “Convinced yet?”

“Hmm, could do with a bit more, just to make absolutely sure.”

[softlass27]

Aaron Week Day 2: "I don't have enough middle fingers to let you know how I feel."

AO3 link here

“That’s it, you’ve got it!”

Aaron fondly watched his husband and his son from his spot in the open back door, a mug of freshly-brewed coffee keeping his hands warm as he looked out into the garden.

After picking Seb up from nursery the day before, they’d nipped to the garden centre to buy a rake, Robert insisting that the amount of fallen leaves covering their lawn was getting out of control. After 15 minutes of wandering, Seb had spotted a bright red child-sized rake, and had instantly run to grab it and bring back to the half-filled trolley (because of course they couldn’t just get the one thing they’d come for, not when Robert was involved) with a hopeful look in his eyes.

“Please Daddy, I wanna rake the leaves, too!” he’d begged, and the thing was only a tenner, so Aaron had chucked it in the trolley with everything else.

What was one more item when they’d already picked up yet another overpriced potted plant they didn’t need?

So now Aaron was watching Robert show Seb how to rake the leaves into the pile he was creating at the foot of the garden, gently guiding Seb’s hands in a slow pulling motion before letting him try it himself. It took a few goes, but Seb eventually got the hang of it, watching the way Robert did it with his own full-sized rake before copying him as best he could, toddling alongside him.

Perhaps it wasn’t the most exciting way to spend a Saturday morning, but Aaron enjoyed himself anyway, taking a few photos and videos on his phone to show Robert later.

At one point, the rising sun disappeared behind the gathering clouds and the morning took a dark and chilly turn, so he grabbed a couple of bobbly hats and brought them out to them.

“C’mere mister, don’t want your ears to get cold,” he said as he crouched down to gently tug Seb’s on, tucking the tips of his ears under the wool and sweeping his messy hair out of his eyes.

“You too,” he said as he yanked the larger one over Robert’s head – a little less gently this time.

“I can manage, thanks,” Robert smacked his hands away so he could adjust the hat himself.

“Just tryna be helpful.”

“You could be helpful by giving us a hand out here,” Robert fired back, raising an eyebrow and holding out the rake.

Aaron just shook his head and pressed a kiss to Robert’s cold, pink cheek, before retreating back to his perch in the doorway, letting the warmth of the house keep his back nice and toasty.

He sat on the top step for another fifteen minutes, watching as the pile of leaves under the tree grew higher and higher, and Jesus, maybe Robert did have a point about how much there was. It was massive.

“Think we’re done, kiddo,” Robert leaned against the rake and grinned triumphantly at the pile and the cleared green grass around it. Seb cheered and tossed his smaller rake down on the ground.

“Nice one,” Aaron said as he came to stand beside them.

“Think we deserve a hot chocolate, don’t you?” said Robert, wiping his brow.

Seb nodded vigorously. “With marshmallows.”

“Obviously, after all that hard work.”

“Sounds good,” Aaron added, scooping Seb up in his arms.

“Er,” Robert raised an eyebrow. “I didn’t see much hard work from you, Mr Sugden.”

“I… supervised,” Aaron said with a decisive nod, making Seb giggle. “So you gonna get cracking on those hot chocolates, then?”

“What, do I have to do everything round here?”

“Well, you’re the best at making them.”

“You are, Daddy,” Seb added, and Robert softened.

“Flattery will get you everywhere,” he sighed and headed towards the house. “Three hot chocolates, coming up!”

Once Robert was safely inside, Aaron walked towards the giant leaf pile, still carrying Seb with him.

“You know what the best part of making a pile of leaves is?”

Seb shook his head.

“This.”

Aaron turned so he was facing away from the pile, and jumped backwards – right into it. Seb shrieked instantly, his eyes wide with surprise as they landed in among the leaves with a thump.

“Oh!” His jaw dropped open comically from his spot on Aaron’s chest, as he took in the sea of orange, red and brown surrounding them. “We fell.”

“We jumped,” Aaron grinned and picked up a handful of leaves, tossing them lightly in Seb’s face, causing him to jump and blink rapidly in surprise. He paused for about half a second, before picking up his own smaller clump and throwing them back at Aaron’s chest.

“Again, Daddy, again!”

Aaron pushed himself up and turned back to the pile, swinging Seb over it.

“One… two… three!” 

He tossed Seb alone this time, sending him flying through the air and disappearing into the pile. It only took a second for him to pop his head back up – leaves sticking to his woolly hat – and start cackling hysterically as he ran back to Aaron’s arms for another go.

Aaron tossed him a few more times, and when the pile became too small for them to keep going, they settled for throwing and kicking leaves in each other’s direction, sending huge flurries of them up into the air. Aaron was laughing just as hard as Seb, so hard that he almost missed the strangled yell coming from behind him.

“Aaron!”

He froze and turned to see Robert stood at the top of the garden with a stricken expression on his face.

“My lawn… ” Robert stared the pile – or what was left of it – as a strong gust of wind blew a few leaves further across the garden until they hit his feet. He looked like he might actually cry.

“D’you know how long this took me? What am I saying, of course you know, you sat on your backside and watched me do it!”

As Robert came marching down towards them, leaves crunching loudly under his feet, Aaron took a glance at the state of the garden and winced slightly. “Yeah, okay, we made a bit of a mess. But come on, what’s the point in a pile of leaves if you can’t jump in it?”

“No point,” Seb piped up from where he was half hidden behind Aaron’s legs.

Robert shot him an exasperated look before scowling at Aaron. “I don’t have enough middle fingers to let you know how I feel right now.”

“Look, you don’t have to rake them up again, I’ll do it.”

“Too right you will!” Robert huffed, but Aaron could see a flicker of amusement creeping into his eyes. “Right, well… since you’re gonna be the one clearing this mess up, that means I can do this.”

Robert moved lightning fast, leaning down to scoop a large handful of leaves and shoving them down the collar of Aaron’s hoodie.

“Rob, don’t!” Aaron took off running, hearing the sound of Robert and Seb laughing behind him, shortly followed by quick footsteps.

“Get ’im, Seb!”

[robronsecretsanta]

Fic: Demons of the Past

to @dancerinvisible, love from your secret santa

Demons never announced when they were coming back for a visit. Aaron’s demons have been silent for the past few years.

Seb age 3

After Seb came back to them, they had decided to go ahead with the surrogacy. A year ago little Annie had joined them. She had Aaron’s blue eyes and beautiful nose which meant that every single member of her family would let her get away with murder, especially Robert. Grandma Chas and Grandpa Paddy called her Angel. She truly looked like what most described as a perfect example of angel, however, her parents, Liv and her brother knew better.

She was small but her screams would bring down the strongest resolves. She could not tolerate anything that was cold or wet which meant bath time with Annie was a war. Aaron and Robert had a rotating system for bath time as their two children could not be more opposite. As much as Annie hated the touch of water, Seb adored it. He was fascinated by rain, intrigued by puddles, excited when he saw the sea and was totally thrilled with the swimming pool!

It was something that Aaron had accidently discovered when he was almost one years old. He would splash and scream in delight every time Aaron had taken him. Aaron could still remember the first time he had taken him. It was when Robert had left Seb with Aaron. He was still very aware of the fact that having Seb alone was a test and an exercise in bonding. He knew Robert trusted him with Seb but was still a bit wary of the fact that he did not want to impose Seb on Aaron. After walking on eggshells around Aaron for the past while, Aaron had been fed up with Robert and practically demanded to have some alone time with Seb.

“If you can’t let me have him on my own, how can I prove that I am ok with him in our life?” Aaron had asked.

“I just don’t want you to feel like you have to spend time with him alone, if that’s not what you want Aaron. I love you and I don’t want anything to make you feel like I forgotten how he came into our lives and the pain I have caused you. I don’t want you to be hurt again Aaron.”

“Look, I know that. But we need to get passed where he came from and focus on the future. I need to spend time with him alone. He isn’t just my partner’s son anymore. He is sort of my stepson as well and we all need this.”

Shortly afterwards Robert had agreed and he dropped Seb and Aaron off at a big park in Hotten with the promise of picking them up in and having dinner in town after his meeting. It was in this instance that Seb had been introduced to the public swimming pool. While passing by the pool he had started laughing and clapping his hands. Encouraged, Aaron then had taken him to see other children play. After a while when Seb’s interested had failed to be taken away from the laughter of other children and the splashing, Aaron had taken him to a nearby shop to buy both of them swimming suits and tiny life jacket and tube. Armed with their new fun equipment, they had spent the rest of the afternoon in the water. Seb did not have any hesitation when Aaron had first lowered him down in the water. Just excited and that had escalated to screaming and shrieking with laughter as his little feet was kicking the water.

From that day forward, it had become a weekly event. Sometimes Robert and Liv would join them but it was an Aaron and Seb activity. Of course until Seb moved to Liverpool.

After, when Seb was back, it had taken a few days for them to get back to the routine of having a small child around again but after a few weeks of adjustments, Aaron had taken Seb to the indoor pool and they had resumed their weekly “Aaron and Seb fun time” as Robert would call it.

After the “fiasco visit to the pool of 2020”, and after Annie had been banned from the pool, it was agreed between the parents that Aaron would take Seb to the pool while Robert would find an activity with Annie (it was napping, both Annie and Robert were very fond of napping).

Seb had started to learn how to float using his feet. Aaron was certain that he would become a great swimmer. He was thinking he was old enough to enroll him in one of the classes. Afterwards he had looked up the schedule for beginners lessons. That night he told Robert that Seb was ready to start swimming lessons.

For the next few weeks after Seb had started his swimming lessons that included other toddlers and their parents, Aaron and Robert had started to notice a strange behavior from him. At first Robert noticed it at bath time. He had taken his shirt off as to not get wet. Seb was looking at his torso and frowning. He then touched his stomach as if to find something. He then looked at his own tummy with a frown. Robert put it down as his son’s way of noticing he had put some extra weight on and made a mental note to go running with Aaron again.

But it happened again a week later one night when they had both Annie and Seb in their bed and reading them a bedtime story. This time Seb lifted Annie’s pj’s and looked as her little tummy and started frowning again while Aaron was busy folding laundry. He didn’t bring attention to it as he knew his son was just curious about the baby.

It all came to a head a week later. Robert was cooking dinner and Liv was plastered across the living room with what seemed the entire contents of her backpack and “doing homework”. She was really texting with Gabby and not paying attention to anything else. Seb was surrounded by his plush toys and cars. Annie was down for nap time before dinner. Robert would check up on them from time to time to bring them snacks.

Aaron wasn’t home yet from a pick up. He was due any moment. While Robert was distracted and Liv wasn’t looking, Seb picked up a red pen that had rolled away from Liv’s school stuff and started to play with it. At first he started to draw on his own arms. By the time that Robert turned around to check on them again, he had covered his stomach with marks with the red pen.

“Liv!” Robert shouted which startled both Liv and Seb.

“What?” Liv shouted back at him.

“Look at him! How many times Liv? You have a big room with a desk specifically for doing homework! If you insist on doing it here at least make sure he isn’t around to go through your stuff. “He said as he took the pen away from Seb.

It was at that moment that Aaron came in.

“Dada!” screamed Seb and started to run towards Aaron who picked him up.

“Whoa! What happened to you little man? Did auntie Liv start doing art experiments on you again?” Aaron asked Seb.

Seb giggled and shake his head no.

“I did it myself! Now I look like you” Seb said proudly. He expected that his dad would say that he loves it and he is proud of him as always.

What he didn’t expect was the sudden silence. Aaron was frozen and Liv and Robert were looking at him with worried eyes.

After a moment that no one seemed to be able to move, Aaron composed himself enough to ask “What do you mean look like me?”

“I saw at the pool that only you have the lines on your belly and no one else has them. I drew the lines on my belly so I look like you.” Responded Seb in his innocent voice. He had sensed that there was something wrong and perhaps he mustn’t have said what he did. He became more worried as he saw his daddy’s eyes become sad almost as if he was about to cry.

“Why are you sad daddy? Don’t you want me to be like you?” Seb asked almost in tears.

“No, no sweetheart. It’s not that. I love you and I am so proud of you, yeah? But how about you don’t worry about looking like me? Because you and I are best mates and nothing is gonna change that. Red lines or no red lines, yeah?” Aaron said hurriedly. He didn’t know what else to say. He was stunted.

As to change the subject and move past the horrible moment, Robert approached them and took Seb from Aaron’s arms. “Come on you. Let’s get you cleaned up before tea, yeah?”

“I’ll take him” Liv volunteered and took Seb upstairs.

Robert took Aaron in his arms and clung to him. He couldn’t say anything. He knew his husband’s emotions were in turmoil now and the only thing he could do was hold him.

It was later in bed when Aaron turned to him and said “I’m sorry.”

“You have nothing to be sorry about. Do you hear me? Nothing.” Robert held Aaron tighter in his arms. “He won’t understand it now if you tell him, but perhaps in a few years, you will be able to tell him about your scars.”

“Maybe it’s best if you take him swimming from now on. Just for a while.” Aaron said.

“No. You are not that person anymore that shies away from his scars or his past. You are my beautiful, strong, complicated, and damaged husband and I love every little part of you. You have come so far and you can’t go back and hide yourself from the people you love the most. You are his hero. He loves you so much he wants to be exactly like you. You are not hiding yourself from him. We can tell him that your scars are not something that makes you you and he can love you without having to look like you. But you are not hiding from him. You understand me?” Robert said passionately as he looked at Aaron’s eyes.

“You know, it’s going to come up again and Annie is going to ask about them in future.so it’s better to get used to them knowing every part of you, because we are yours and we all love every part of you” Robert continued as Aaron’s silent tears were dampening his beautiful face.

“I love you so much.” It’s the only thing he could say. They would have to have very difficult conversations with their children in the future, but as long as he had Robert’s arms to turn to, he knew for certain they were all going to be alright.