#and this takes place when Michael is trapped in Dean's head and Cas has already secretly made the deal with the Empty. sobbing | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

luci-in-trenchcoats · 3 years

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Season 16 (Part 1)

Summary: After being captured by Michael while Dean was under his control, the reader has spent a very long time locked away waiting for someone to come and find her. When the day finally comes that the door opens, it’s not a familiar face she’s greeted with. Somehow the impossible is standing right in front of her but there’s no time to think about that. Something is terribly wrong and the reader needs the help of this strange young man if she wants to stop what Michael’s put in motion and have a chance at seeing Dean alive again...

Masterlist

Pairing: Dean x reader

Square: Free Space

Word Count: 3,600ish

Warnings: language, SPN season 15 and series spoilers, injury, mention of main character deaths, mention of torture, angst, fluff

A/N: This series takes place post season 15 and follows canon (i.e. if it happened in the show, it happened in this story’s universe). This series is told between the reader and Dean’s POV. This was also written for @supernatural-jackles Tell Me A Story bingo!

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Reader’s POV

You just about had a heart attack when the door opened. It’d been such a long time since it’d been opened. Years and years and years. You’d lost track of the days quickly but it was long enough for you to accept that it’d been a very long time. Long enough to accept that when Michael took over Dean and threw you down in the windowless little room, Dean didn’t win that fight.

The only thing keeping you going aside from the spell Michael had put up to keep you permanently trapped, body stuck in time, was the desire to save Dean. Or what was left of him. You’d been alone for years, body having taken a beating by Michael when he first captured you. You were still covered in bruises, broken ribs that wouldn’t heal, pain in every breath. You didn’t sleep, didn’t eat. Solitude, cut off from the world, that was your main form of torture. Dean though...who knew what hell he was going through trapped with a psychopath like that for all these years.

You readied yourself, a dark figure walking inside the room. The room was pitch black to a certain point before you were trapped under a bright light you’d yet to figure out how to turn off. The figure stopped as their feet hit the brightness, a pair of brown boots and slim dark jeans all you could make out. They mumbled something and you felt the air shift slightly. You dared to reach at hand out to where the invisible wall keeping you trapped had been.

Your hand waved right on through it and you suddenly felt cool, clean air hit you. The person jolted when you sprang up, running away as you bolted for the door. You followed them up a flight of stairs and straight out into the foyer of a very nice house. You could see it was a man now and tackled him, straddling his hips and grabbing your knife from your waistband of your loose shorts, holding it to his throat. He breathed hard as you stared at him, cocking your head.

He was the spitting image of Dean. Mostly. His eyes weren’t green and there was something about his nose that reminded you of your own. The biggest tell of all though was the genuine fear in his face, the confusion.

“What’s your name,” you said. You held up the knife for a moment and tucked it away when you saw he was only focused on it. The young man, no more than twenty years old, took a deep breath. You yelped when he threw his legs up and wrapped them around your waist, yanking you off of him. He scrambled to his feet but you were on his tail, grabbing at his jacket. He spun around and popped you in the face, sending you to the floor.

You whined and cupped your cheek, the young man frozen in the doorway with a horrified look on his face.

“Who punches their own mom!” you shouted. He ran out the door and you went after, growling at your bare feet as he took off down the gravel driveway. “I’m gonna find you!”

You stomped your foot on the cool concrete front path, glancing to your right and spotting a sports car. You jogged back inside and found a pair of women’s sneakers, a little too big but you tied them tight and found some keys on a front table.

About two minutes later you were pulling up beside the guy on the road and hopped out of the car, the man running into the nearby treeline. You pulled out your knife and threw it, catching his jacket and pinning the sleeve to the tree trunk. He stumbled and fell down as you walked over, staring up with wide eyes. You sighed and ran a hand over your face.

“Can you at least tell me your first name?” you asked. He shook his head and you crossed your arms. “I bet your name is Lyle, isn’t it.”

“How’d you know that?” he asked, voice a bit higher than Dean’s but it made you smile, something warm and familiar to it.

“I’ve had a lot of time to think recently. Lyle is my top name for a boy if I ever had one,” you said. “So. Lyle Winchester.”

“That’s not my name,” he said. He stood up and pulled out the knife, carefully holding it out to you.

“You look just like Dean and me. You’re my son...somehow,” you said.

“Fine. My name is Lyle and that’s all I can say about myself,” he said. “I’m serious.”

You recognized the tone, that edge to it, the roughness but laced with an undercurrent of worry. Part of you wanted him to tell you everything about him but you knew he couldn’t, instead letting yourself give him a simple nod.

“I’ll make you a deal Lyle. I won’t ask questions about you that you can’t answer if you tell me how and why you got me out of there and answer anything else I want to know about this little situation.”

“Or else what?” he scoffed.

“Or else someday when you’re a teenager I won’t let you do anything. Lyle.” You took the knife from him and put it away, taking a deep breath. You stepped back out to the road, leaning against the car. You shut your eyes, something heavy draped over you. You peeled one eye open, Lyle leaning back against the car next to you in a blue flannel and dark gray t-shirt. His black hooded jacket was over your shoulders and you slipped your arms through the sleeves, wrapping them around yourself. You squeezed your eyes tight, shuddering before warm arms embraced you, Lyle almost as tall as Dean holding you close to him. “How did you know I was down there?”

“I can’t answer that,” he said.

“What year is it?” you asked.

“2089.” You froze, staring up at him. “Well, 2089 where we are right now is.”

“Lyle. It was 2018 when Michael took me. That’s not possible.”

“I can’t answer that either.” Tears welled up in your eyes and he hugged you again. “Sorry.”

“Dean was thirty nine the last time I saw him and it’s seventy one years later? He is dead. Sam is dead. They’re all dead so explain to me how the fucking hell I have a son with Dean!” you shouted. You pushed him away and ran your hands over your face. “Years. Fucking years I’ve sat down there waiting for him to come and get me. Him or Sam or someone. Fucking seventy one years!”

“Y/N,” he said, sounding a bit awkward but he cleared his throat. “I can’t answer everything because I don’t know everything. But I exist and that should tell you something.”

You wiped off your face with his sleeve and looked around, turning back and staring at him.

“I’m at the start of whatever this is and you’re way down the line,” you said. He nodded with a slight smile.

“I don’t understand it but this, where I’m from, this has already happened to you.”

“You’re from the future then,” you said.

“Not exactly,” he said.

“A different universe?” He looked at you like you were nuts and the air shifted, Lyle freezing. You turned and saw Jack, a smile on his face. “Jack?”

“Hi Y/N,” he said. He stepped over and gave you a big hug, a little bit of ache inside you easing finally. “Don’t worry about him. He’s just on pause.”

“Jack I don’t understand fucking anything. What’s going on?” you asked. He pursed his lips and sighed.

“Well you already figured out Lyle is your and Dean’s son. I didn’t think I could slip that one past you. But it had to be him that came and saved you.”

“Why?”

“Dean’s in heaven. Has been for 69 years.” You broke away from him feeling like you’d had a punch to gut and making you breathless. “I probably shouldn’t have told you that with the whole decades worth of trauma thing happening right now.”

“Did Michael…” you trailed off.

“No. A piece of rebar on a vamp hunt,” he said.

“He what?” you said.

“Yeah got pushed back on it. Sam was okay though. Oh and Dean had a dog for a few months.”

“Dean fucking died from that? That’s what kept him down?” you said. Jack nodded and you looked down, blinking your eyes. “Disregarding what is going on in my head right now about that, why didn’t you heal him? Or Castiel?”

“Well Cas was in heaven helping me rebuild after he sort of died and I brought him back. I kinda am the new God,” he said with a smile.

“I’m proud of that but again, why didn’t you come down here and heal Dean?”

“I’m sort of hands off in that regard,” he said. You were about to go off on him for that when it hit you.

“Jack how long have you known I was alive,” you said.

“2020 when I took over, I got these extra-”

“You knew I was alive and left me in a hole in the ground for over seventy years?” you said.

“Like I said, I’m hands off,” he said.

“I was your fucking mom! I took care of you! I protected you! I almost died for you more than once and when you find out I’m still alive you say fuck that bitch, she can deal with it on her own? What the fuck is wrong with you!” you shouted. You slapped him in the face, Jack pouting as you sank down to your knees. “I want Dean.”

“Y/N.”

“I want Dean and Sam.”

“Y/N-”

“I want Dean!”

“I can’t-”

“Fuck you! You’re as every bit as evil as that devil father of yours after all,” you said. You forced yourself to your feet, tears prickling in his eyes. “Oh did I hurt your feelings? Tough fucking shit! Do you realize that I have not only been stuck waiting for years but my body got stuck too. I’ve been sitting with broken ribs for seventy years. Every single breath excruciating.”

You yanked up your shirt, deep purple and black skin radiating across most of your abdomen. Jack reached out a hand and you moved back, dropping your shirt.

“I thought you were hands off. I don’t want your-” you said before warmth trickled through you, the pain gone, body feeling so strange at being without it.

“I don’t have to touch to heal you,” he said quietly. He swallowed and bowed his head. “I tried to let people live their lives without my interference and sometimes they’re messy but I’ve come to realize recently that’s wrong. A bit of help here and there is good. It gives people hope and maybe I should have done things different.”

“My family’s dead and I don’t want to wait around decades more to see them again in heaven. You’re going to-”

“No I won’t. Lyle’s life counts on you doing exactly what you’re supposed to as do your two other children’s. I can’t just put you in heaven. You can’t die right and you have to wait to see Dean until things work themselves out. Lyle’s going to be with you for a while and help get some things settled. It’s already set in motion so go with it,” he said.

“Jack I want Dean. Please,” you said. “Please Jack. Just five minutes.”

“Would you rather have your family back in the near future, alive, or would you rather have your and Dean’s souls torn apart and you never see him again, dead or alive? Rather he over there doesn’t exist? Rather no one exists?”

“I didn’t say that. Of course I would rather have them back alive-“

“Then be patient.”

“Jack. You gotta give me something. Something please.”

“I’ll talk to Lyle, tell him he can loosen up some. But I can’t tell you what to do. You have to follow your gut. Listen to Lyle and it’ll work out,” said Jack. You squeezed your eyes shut, Jack carefully resting a hand on your shoulder. “Do you hate me?”

“I hate that our family was ripped apart. I hate that you didn’t tell the boys I was alive once you knew. I hate that the last time I saw Dean alive we argued. I think what I hate most of all is that you treated us like everyone else. We’re not, Jack. We’re your family. All of us deserved a chance at normal and we didn’t get it.”

“Sam did.”

“How many years did Sam live without us? Without his brother?” you asked. Jack glanced down and you nodded. “You said you became God? Why didn’t you get rid of the monsters altogether Jack. Don’t tell me you don’t have that power.”

“I thought...I thought it was the natural order.”

“Yet you know there are other universes with no monsters at all. You could have taken the monsters away. Shit turn them human for all I care. The boys didn’t have to keep hunting after you took over. You could have been hands off and changed that one fact and saved so many lives, improved so many lives.”

“No. I couldn’t have changed it. Not back then.”

“Why the hell not?” you asked. He pulled his hand away and you found yourself in some clean clothes, Lyle’s jacket folded on top of the car.

“Because when I became God, I learned a lot. It sucks knowing that certain things have to happen and that I had to ignore when Sam prayed to me in that barn because things had to happen this way.”

“But why?”

“Because if I didn’t, if I’d intervened then and there, this universe, all of the ones I’ve been busy rebuilding, the way I’ve been rebuilding heaven...it’d be gone. Destroyed and I wouldn’t be able to put it back. It’s a temporary pain even if it doesn’t seem like it. So please, Y/N, please, listen to Lyle. Work with him. It’ll work out and things can be okay. You can have everything you ever wanted and more. You can have the freaking apple pie life and the no monsters and all of it but please understand you have more shit to go through first and whatever happens, do not let Lyle die.”

“He’s my son. I wouldn’t let that happen to him,” you said. Jack nodded and you grabbed his arm when he turned to leave. “You’ve grown up Jackie.”

“I’m still a baby by God standards,” he said.

“The guys take care of you after I was gone?” you asked.

“Yeah. I missed you though,” he said. “I accidentally killed Mary and sort of lost my soul for a bit. Things got bad for a while.”

“Do you see Kelly in heaven sometimes? Mary?” you asked. He nodded and you smiled. “Kids can fuck up and your parents will forgive you.”

“I’m sorry it has to be this way, Y/N. If I could snap my fingers to fix it all, stop it from ever happening, I would.”

“I’m going to trust that it had to be this way,” you said. “But give me a ballpark figure here. When do I get the guys back?”

“That’s relative. You’re going to end up breaking the space time continuum so it’s hard to answer that correctly.” You stared at him and he shrugged. “Not too long. A few days at most. I promise.”

“Wait is that how we have a twenty year old son?” you asked.

“Yes. The next time you see Dean he’ll be younger than the last you saw him. Just trust your gut and Lyle. Next time I see you I hope things are much better,” he said. You opened your mouth but he disappeared. You shook your head and turned around, Lyle now wearing his jacket, standing closer to the passenger seat door. For a long while you both simply stared, Lyle looking as if he’d just had his own long conversation with Jack.

“You can call me Y/N if that makes it easier,” you said. He nodded and you took a deep breath, going to the driver’s side. “So. What’s the next move?”

“Jack just said after I got you out we had to go to Lebanon. He didn’t tell me anything more than that,” he said.

“Any idea where we are?” you asked.

“San Antonio,” he said. “So we go North?”

“Yeah,” you said quietly. “Mind taking the first shift driving? I sort of haven’t slept in like seventy years.”

“No that’s fine,” he said. He walked around the front and you made your way to the passenger side, climbing in and sighing. He got behind the wheel and took a deep breath. “You and dad run a construction business.”

“That’s nice,” you said, smiling to yourself. “Dean’d be real good at that kind of thing. He’s really smart.”

“I know. Most guys can’t call up their dad for help on their architecture homework,” he said.

“You go to college?” you asked, Lyle nodding. “Do you know about...this stuff?”

“I’m still not convinced I’m not insane. I just got home on a friday night. We had dinner and everyone went outside to have a bonfire in the backyard. I went in to use the bathroom and Uncle Jack stopped me before I could get back outside. He said a lot of crazy stuff I didn’t believe but the fact you were in that basement...you and dad are only like forty but you’re obviously too old right now to have had me when that would have made sense and Uncle Jack said space and time is gonna break and-”

“Lyle,” you said, holding up a hand. “Relax. I just want to know, do you know what hunting is?”

“Dad doesn’t go hunting,” he said, narrowing his eyes. You smiled and nodded to yourself. “We don’t even own a gun.”

“I doubt that. But that must mean that something happens to the monsters along the way too.”

“What do you mean monsters? And why were you kidnapped in a basement? And what the fuck is going on? You’re supposed to be my mom that runs the family business and you kick ass in your soccer league in the summer and you can’t cook to save your life and that’s okay cause you’re really good at baking and pies and shit and I just don’t understand who you really are.” His face was flush, eyes fighting back tears. You smiled, reaching over and cupping his cheek.

“You’re a good guy Lyle. We obviously did something right,” you said, wiping away a stray tear that fell. “It’s scary. It’s really scary. I’m not your mom yet but I will be someday. I promise I will tell you everything you don’t know when I catch up to your time. Dean and I will. But we need to go to Lebanon and the faster we can go there and figure out what we have to do, the faster we can get you back home where you belong.”

“But can’t you-”

“This world isn’t safe, Lyle. It is very unsafe for a Winchester especially. Please drive now,” you said. You put on your seatbelt and he closed his eyes. “Please.”

“I was supposed to be having a smore right now,” he said.

“I know. But saving the world is kinda cool,” you said.

“I don’t want to save the world. I want to go home and not see my mom be beat to shit. I want my dad to go back to teasing me at dinner and not being dead,” he said.

“If we do this right, you can go back to that really soon. It hasn’t happened for me yet. We can talk all about this when you come back. The night you come back we can talk through it all. But we have to get going. The sooner we go, the sooner it goes back to normal.”

“It’ll never be normal again.”

“Yes it will. I promise.”

“How do you-“

“Because I just had this really bad thing happen to me but someday I’m going to have you and everything I ever wanted with Dean. So it sucks right now but it’ll be better eventually. I know it will. You’re here so I know it’ll be normal.” He nodded and wiped off his face, starting the car up again.

“Y/N. Are you okay after...you know...being down there beat up all that time?”

“Not really,” you said. He took off his jacket and handed it to you. You stared before he rolled his eyes, laying it over your front.

“Sleep. I can drive.”

“Lyle.”

“Y/N. Rest. It’s safe. I got this.”

“You take after your dad.”

“Take after someone else too,” he said. You smiled and nodded, resting your head on your shoulder, closing your eyes. “I’ll wake you up for breakfast.”

“Egg and-”

“Cheese on a biscuit, two breakfast burritos, extra hot sauce and a small hot latte.”

“At least my road trip order didn’t change,” you said, quickly relaxing and falling asleep for the first time in ages.

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A/N: Read part 2 here!

#tell me a story bingo #supernatural #spn #dean x reader #dean winchester x reader #dean winchester #supernatural fanfiction #dean #winchester #dean spn

194 notes · View notes

astermacguffin · 3 years

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Okay. I warn y'all that this is very much a Poast™. This is another one of Those Poasts™. You have been warned.

I very much blame (affectionate) @autisticandroids for this, since this is pretty much me trying to combine as many concepts as possible from the #mpregpocalypse tag.

In this au, Cas is pretty much just collecting babies left and right. The following stuff are all simultaneously true in this spn mpreg rewrite:

- Cas absorbs the deanlisa baby and carries the child himself. This is his first pregnancy. This is also the most "monstrous" of his children because of the godstiel stuff and the leviathans.

- For maximum effect, I don't want Cas to give birth just yet. I want Benny to see Cas with the baby bump and put the dots together in his head. I want Cas to give birth alone, after Dean and Benny already went through the rift. I want Naomi to take Cas out of purgatory and leave his child alone there. I want Cas to grieve for the loss of his child when he remembers. (We'll go back to this in the future.)

- Dean fucks Casifer at one point and impregnates Cas' body. (I mean, with Casifer peeling off his layers and thotting up the place while in the bunker? Not surprising tbh.) NOTE. I wanna be clear with something: this baby is Dean and Lucifer's nephil. I mean, biologically it's a Destiel baby, but with Cas' grace growing weaker and him being possessed by Lucifer, in terms of grace this is pretty much Lucifer's nephil. (But also not??? Because what allowed the conception to happen in the first place is Cas wanting it SO BAD.)

- No one else notices the conception of this baby because Cas hides it within himself (the same way he did with the deanlisa baby) and pauses the pregnancy at will.

- When Cas meets Kelly, they are very much BOTH pregnant with Lucifer's kid. Remember that screenshot where they both look pregnant and bonding about their babies? Yeah, this is inspired by that. When Cas touches Kelly's baby bump and they like soulbond or whatever, Kelly looks at him and goes "oh you're pregnant too?"

- Cas tells him that it's Dean's child, but leaves out the Lucifer part. They already have one Lucifer nephil in danger, he doesn't need anyone else knowing this secret (especially since he hid the nature of this child so well for so long). Kelly thinks he's hiding it because of the Dean part.

- They both know Kelly's not gonna survive giving birth, so they already have a plan: Cas will transfer the pregnancy to himself when it's almost time for Jack to come out (the same way he did with the deanlisa baby). Cas is confident that he'll survive what Kelly cannot. (His hubris, of course, always tend to bite him back.) Dean, Mary, and Sam arrive just in time to see Cas pregnant and about to give birth. Kelly catches them up on the plot.

- Cas dies of childbirth due to an unexpected complication: the pregnancy transfer triggers the birth of the other child inside him, which makes him give birth to TWO children. The strength of the explosion unfortunately kills both him and Kelly, rendering Cas' sacrifice as pointless. (As much as I wanna keep Kelly alive, the point of this au is to inflict as much damage as possible)

- Lucifer and Mary still get stuck in Apocalypse world, and now Dean and Sam have to care for TWO children, one of which is Jack (who still grows quickly) and...another baby? They have no idea who the fuck this baby is until they find two videos: one made by Kelly and one by Cas (a backup plan they made just in case one or both of them don't survive).

- In the video, Cas reveals that the child is his and Dean's nephil (again, removing the Lucifer part). Dean just takes it in stride (since they had enough sex in the later seasons for it to be a genuine possibility) and takes Cas's word.

- In any other scenario, Sam would definitely be teasing Dean for impregnating Cas. But since Cas is dead and they're still grieving, he shelves this conversation for a future time. (With so much plot happening, Sam never finds the right chance and eventually just forgets it. He's just happy that he was right all along.)

- They agree to never let anyone else learn about the baby's nature, which the baby seems to understand as well, choosing to not manifest any angelic abilities. In fact, the baby internalized Cas' instructions to keep all their secrets under wraps that the kid goes selectively mute throughout the series. (I wanna see Eileen teaching ASL to the kid.)

- The two babies scenario works great for two reasons: it satisfies my "give Dean a baby" instinct (that pretty much drives my baby jack truthing) while still keeping Jack the way that he is in canon.

- Dean lets the baby rest on Cas' chest for a short while before wrapping Cas up with the curtains. Both Dean and the baby cry over the body.

- I want to give Jack as many Problems Disorders in this au. I want him to be jealous of the way Dean treats his twin (because they're pretty much twins, right? They have the same grace-father, they got birthed by the same body, so yeah).

- Dean treats the baby with as much care and love while still treating Jack like shit. Sam once calls him out on it and says "Dean, they're both Cas' children." Dean throws out an "I can hardly look at the freak" rant. Jack wakes up Cas from the Empty, yada yada.

More fucked up shit below the cut:

- I wanna keep this as close to canon as I can, so Dean would still exhibit suicidality before Tombstone. You would think that the baby would at least hinder this instinct, but he genuinely believes that he's poison and that everyone he touches dies. (And besides, Sam is good with both Jack and the baby so they won't need me anymore, right?)

- Cas comes back, and things mostly stay the same as in canon (except there's now a baby there, who honestly won't influence much of the plot until later). Dean never really apologized that much to Jack in canon (and I still hate it) but in this au, it would work perfectly. I want Jack to believe that Dean still sees him as a freak, even if he's a bit nicer now that Cas is back. (I can and will put my entire pussy into the Dean-as-John, Jack-as-Sam parallels.)

- When Jack kills Mary, Cas hides it from Dean and Sam. We're going full Torturewife on this one, folks.

- Jack's truth spell forces Cas to confess that (1) Cas hid the fact about Jack's soullessness; (2) Cas lied about Jack killing Mary, and; (3) the Destiel baby is technically a Dean/Lucifer nephil. Chaos fucking ensues.

- Dean has to confront the fact that both of the kids (HIS kids) are Lucifer's spawn.

- Chuck doesn't really care about the baby since it never manifested any powers (yet), unlike Jack (who is a genuine threat to him).

- Moriah happens, Jack dies. (And it's even more fucked up now because despite being soulless, Jack remembers all the insecurities he got from Dean. The "It's okay, I understand" line Jack says to Dean while having a gun pointed to him is sooooooo.) Rupture happens, their divorce is finalized and Cas takes custody of the baby.

- Cas having some father-child bonding with the baby as a breather between all this fucked up stuff.

- The Trap happens, they make up, and oh? Who's this person who helped Cas escape and get the flower? It's the deanlisa baby, but now grown! Together with Emma! She was thankfully found by her big sister, Emma, when she was a baby in purgatory. She had to grow up fast and now they survive together.

- After eating Eve in order to save Cas, the deanlisa child is now technically the new Mother of monsters. Dean explains the Chuck problem, so the two choose to come with them to help.

- Cas never really explained the deanlisa baby, huh? When they get back with their now grown child (and Emma, who doesn't really hold a grudge over the entire Sam killing her thing) and Cas explains, Dean is baffled but takes it in stride. I mean, they just made up! He doesn't wanna fight with him anymore and he wants the family together again!

- They make the two stay with the baby so they'll be safe in the bunker while they try to trap Chuck with the Mark of Cain spell. It fails, of course. (But hey, at least there was sibling bonding time in the bunker.)

- Billie brings back Jack and they formulate a plan (Billie doesn't go evil in this one btw.) They strengthen Jack, Jack knows that he'll be a bomb and is totally fine with it. "Maybe if I do this one good thing, Dean won't see me as a freak anymore." Remember, Jack internalized a lot of the shit Dean said.

- Cas attempts to call out the self-sacrificial bullshit and that Dean actually loves him, but Jack insists. "You would do the same! In fact, you have done the same! (In reference to the Empty deal, which still happens here btw.) I'm just learning from all of you." If there's one thing I'm obsessed about in fics, it's when Jack calls them out for learning martyrdom from team free will.

- Dean finds out about the plan and tries to talk Jack out of it. They have a heart-to-heart, Dean finally fucking apologizes for all the complexes that he's given Jack, and Jack (for the first time) finally believes that Dean doesn't see him as a monster anymore. Jack stops the process so he doesn't become a bomb (but at least he's stronger than he was before).

- They call Billie to come up with an alternative plan. She considers the options, and says an alternative plan would be harder and would require more players in the field. "As long as we don't have to sacrifice any of our loved ones anymore, we're good," Dean says. "I don't think that's an easy request, but we'll try," Billie says, giving a pointed look at Cas. (Hmmmm, wonder how this would come to play later?)

- Billie points out that the destiel baby is in fact not powerless, but is instead choosing to supress their own power. If the child can be convinced to unlock their own capabilities, then perhaps they might stand a better chance at winning.

- They spread out to gather more allies: Sam goes to Rowena, Dean goes to Michael, Billie goes to Gabriel (yes, he's alive here), and the kids stay in the bunker with Cas to try and explore each other's abilities. (Since I hated the Michael-Lucifer nonsense of 15x19, none of that happens here. Lucifer doesn't go back and Michael doesn't betray them.)

- Jack finds out that he can push out all the energy he gathered for the bomb into a one-time-use blast. They find out that the baby can apparently enhance the power of whoever they're holding. And the new Eve apparently has traces of Godstiel/Leviathan still in her after being in the womb with them. (She also spends the time catching up with Cas because they've not seen each other for years.) Emma is just vibing there, adoring her powerful younger siblings and interrogating her father's...husband? Boyfriend? Ex? (She's still confused about their status.)

- This goes just like in S11, and they go all out and attack Chuck together until he's weak enough for Death's scythe. There's one shot where the kids are just holding hands to power each other for Jack to deliver a fatal blow. Billie is just around the corner, ready for the final blow, when Cas turns to Dean.

- "Dean, I need to say something." Cue the 15x18 confession scene, except this time Dean knows about the deal now. So the moment Dean realizes what Cas is doing, he tries to stop him.

- "Stop, please stop. Don't say it, you don't have to say it." Because of course, happiness is in just being, it's in just saying it. And Dean knows what true happiness would do.

- But unfortunately, Cas has to do it. (Billie talked to him about it, and her scythe won't exactly do a clean job with something as powerful as a Chuck-Amara hybrid. I don't know when or why they fused together since the bomb plan was cancelled, but it happened here okay? Yeah. So they need something that is guaranteed to be older and greater than God or the Darkness—the Empty. Billie can only go there, but she can't summon it to be on Earth. Enter Cas' deal.)

- Cas says "I love you," Dean reciprocates, they share a final kiss, and then Billie finally reaps God. The Empty arrives to take Chuck, and Cas shares one final moment with his kids before accepting his fate.

- Billie goes to the Empty to make sure the job was done, and she finally gives the Shadow the sleep that she promised. She uses her scythe on the Shadow, because death is the final slumber. (Of course, you can't exactly kill nothingness; she only destroyed an embodiment/personification of the Empty.)

- Post-fight. They're happy because Chuck is finally defeated but also...Cas. Before they even have the chance to process what the fuck just happened, Billie is back and she has Cas with her. "I just put the Shadow into sleep, so it's not like anyone would notice," she says. The problem is that Cas is still very much asleep. (He still has some grace here btw. Maybe he's not at full angel anymore, but he's not fully human either. There wasn't a need to cut out his grace without warning.)

- Dean and the kids crowd Cas' body. The baby's touch on Cas's shoulder (which burns a mark that parallels Dean's) is what wakes him up. Reunion kiss!

- Happy ending! Michael (with Adam) goes back to heaven to fix things, and they are very much implied to be a couple. Midam rights babyyyyyy! Gabriel goes back to roaming the world and occasionally visits the kids.

- Sam and Eileen organizes a hunter's network and organizes a bunch of safety protocols and rehabilitation projects with the help of the new Eve (which most monsters obey, key word most). Oh, and Saileen definitely swings regularly with Rowena (and occasionally with Gabriel when he's around).

- Emma decides that she likes hanging out with the Wayward Sisters better (and you know what? Good for her). The new Eve decides to hang out there often as well (whenever she isn't busy with monster diplomacy or something).

- When Jack finally feels safe and peaceful enough, he reverts back to his child form. The baby, who has been selectively mute this entire time, holds their brother's face in recognition and utters their first word, which is "JACK!" Dean and Cas cry in joy over this entire exchange. (That's his twin! He missed his twin!)

- They move out of the bunker to get their own house by a lake or something. Whenever the topic of pregnancy comes up again ("Dean, when do you want another baby again?"), they can now playfully joke about it and Dean says something like "Don't steal someone else's baby again, okay? The next baby to be inside you needs to be mine." They're both stupidly horny about the subject, I hate them so much.

- Whenever there's an important event, they all celebrate it in the bunker for the extra space (because their family is, indeed, very large). END.

There's something poetic to me about the Empty being the one that beats Chuck in this mpreg rewrite because technically, the Empty is the Original Womb that gave birth to God. It it the nothingness of potential, the dark water of pregnant beginnings.

All this talk about the Empty and stuff also made me stop and think about the metaphysics of spn. The fact that the Darkness and the Empty are two distinct entities says something interesting about the metaphysical reality of spn. It doesn't treat darkness as a mere absence of light, a mere nothingness, but rather a thing/substance of its own. It's a very Manichean kind of metaphysics as opposed to a Platonic/Neoplatonic one. (Oh, St. Augustine would probably have a blast trying to unravel whatever the fuck is happening with spn.)

The fact that it's also Cas' free will that brought upon God's demise? Delicious.

(If you're still reading, congratulations for finishing my very long spn mpreg rewrite. Why did you do this to yourself tho.)

(also apologies if I didn't give a name to Jack's siblings. I haven't thought of a good name for them just yet)

#spn #destiel #mpregpocalypse #long post #literally what the fuck is this post #aster writes #spn mpreg rewrite #tw suicide #tw mpreg

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poohkeepsee · 3 years

Text

I was going through my AO3 bookmarks, and I wanted to organize them a little bit. These are my Dean/Cas canon-ish fic recs.

season 5

canticles by 2street2car Words: 10,311 Chapters: 1

“But you know something? If I couldn’t get you laid, at least I gave you a good first date.”feat: footsies at a Ruby Tuesday, stargazing, the recreation of an iconic "Dirty Dancing" scene (no, not that one—the other one), and practicing for When You're With A Girl.

FTBYAM MY BELOVED

post season 6

Someone Who's Feeling For Me by ellispark Words: 45,876 Chapters: 1

Dean sees her for the first time in nearly six years in some no-name town in Idaho, and it's panic at first sight.

Lisa Braeden, the one woman Dean ever actually had a shot at a real life with, back from where he buried her in his mind. And her hand is on Cas's arm like it's no big deal, like it belongs there. Cas, Dean's dorky, sweet, badass, angelic best friend, and he's just standing there next to Lisa and not moving her hand away.

Dean feels the jealousy rising, and it's not directed where he expected it to be. Because it takes this exact moment for Dean to realize he's in love with his best friend. He's in love with his best friend, and Lisa is looking at Cas like he's the best thing since automatic rifles, and Dean is utterly fucked.

post bunker

Sun Can't Set Until Nine by LeverDrift Words: 67,939 Chapters: 16

Cas moves into the bunker as his powers start to fail. Dean doesn’t know if the arrangement is as permanent as he wants it to be. He's also not sure why he keeps dreaming about his friend. All he knows is that he wants Cas to stay. Overall warnings: canon-typical miscommunication & Dean having self-hatred issues.

Life Skills by ilovehowyouletmefall Words: 26,052 Chapters: 3

After Metatron steals Castiel's grace, and Cas comes to live in the bunker, Dean spends a lot of time with him, sharing all of his favourite things. Dean can't help it if sharing things with Cas just makes everything better. Besides, it's Dean's job as Cas' friend to introduce him to the joys of human life. To teach him how to be human. And if one of the experiences they end up sharing is sex with women, well... that's just part of Dean's job as Cas' friend too, right? The desire is triangulated, the rituals are intricate.

Sam Stole My Boyfriend by sobsicles Words: 8,445 Chapters: 1

“Dude, you’ve been staring at me a lot lately, like even enough that Sam noticed. More than usual. So, like, what’s up?” Dean pauses, purses his lips and reconsiders. “What did I do?”

Cas knows that would be a perfect time to confess to Dean what exactly happened and what he was thinking. Maybe, Dean had some insight into the situation or even some kind of comfort to offer. But, the longer that he sat there, he realized that he could not tell Dean absolutely anything. So instead, for the first time, Cas fumbled.

“Um,” Cas mutters and abruptly stands. “Freckles?”

Dean blinked up at him as Cas pivoted and left the room. There was only one remaining option he had and unfortunately, it involved Sam.

Aching in the Absence of You by sobsicles Words: 95,090 Chapters: 10

Brittle and battle-worn, Cas looks at him over coffee one morning and says, "I need to go," and Dean instantly knows that he's not coming back.

He's not really sure how he knows it, but he does. It settles into the pit of his stomach, curling hot and tight like something he instinctively wants to tear out with his bare hands. He takes a breath, and it gets stuck in his throat, hitching there. It hurts, hurts, hurts when he finally exhales.

"Yeah," Dean says, "of course you do," and he nods jerkily as he looks down at his phone. He doesn't say goodbye. He doesn't look up from the screen when Cas gets up and leaves the room. He doesn't finish his coffee, or move for a long time.

By nightfall, Cas is gone.

'Communication' by JustAnotherSamlicker Words: 11,656

The same story told from two perspectives.

Dean bought a house and he and Cas fix it up.

Is Dean moving out? Is Cas moving in?

Should they just talk to each other already? (Yes they should)

Build a Home by domesticadventures Words: 20,102

After they save the world, Dean expects Cas to come back to the bunker with them.

He doesn't

season 10

The Most Important Thing by NorthernSparrow Words: 94,462 Chapters: 14

Jimmy Novak remembers nothing of the last six years. Reunited with his troubled daughter Claire, he's struggling to raise her on his own. The most important thing is to make Claire happy. But why does he keep having these dreams of wings, and of two men in a black car? (Canon-divergent from S10E11, when we first met Claire again and Dean was still struggling with the Mark of Cain. Takes places several months later).

season 12

Heroes for Ghosts by pantheon_of_discord Words: 42,922 Chapters: 7

Canon-divergent from 12.08

After Sam and Dean are arrested, Castiel is left alone and scrambling to find them. He knows they’re locked away in a government facility, and he’s still able to hear their prayers, but no matter how he tries Castiel can’t seem to track them. He chases leads and even attempts to hunt on his own, but Mary is AWOL, Crowley refuses to help, and Castiel’s options are running out.

Weeks pass, Castiel’s hope dwindles, and through it all Dean prays, keeping them connected. His voice is comforting, frustrating, and occasionally annoying, but in his solitude Castiel comes to cherish it. But then one day, without warning, Dean stops praying, and Castiel is forced to confront some uncomfortable truths about his feelings.

season 13

i want to do with you (what spring does with cherry trees) by sobsicles Words: 74,173 Chapters: 8

Dean keeps going back.

When he arrives, it's always to blooming flowers and a windmill in the background, not too far from a brook, the sun painting the plains.

He likes it there. He likes to stand in front of the makeshift urn and check that it's still where he put it, switching out the flowers when they wilt. He likes to listen to the sound of birds chirping, insects singing, the faint sound of water trickling in the distance. He likes to turn his face up and feel the sun on his skin, wondering if Cas would do the same if he were here, somehow knowing that he would.

He likes to talk.

There's never a response, but Dean feels the breeze rustle through his hair and watches the flowers bob when bees come to them and stares as the windmill keeps turning, turning, turning. And he imagines that Cas is replying—the windmill is the tilted head, the bobbing flowers are a gentle smile, the breeze is whatever words Dean wants to hear at the time.

Sometimes, it's almost like he's there.

Trial and Tribulations of Raising a Nephilim by Sickandtiredofyou Words: 14,910 Chapters: 6

Dean has far too much on his plate, losing his mom, his best friend and now being a single parent to a newborn nephilim.

In which Jack is an actual newborn instead of a teenager.

post season 13

dumbassery, denial, doing (the three d's to the destination) by sobsicles Words: 108,427 Chapters: 4

Freedom is just one adjustment after the next.

Cas hums again. "I think you already have. It's been months since everything settled. All that's left to do is...get used to it, and perhaps—" His voice stalls out, uncharacteristically, and his gaze roams Dean's face with intensity. When he speaks next, his tone is a little raw. "Perhaps what one does with peace is...whatever they want."

"What if I don't even know what that is?" Dean grumbles, arching an eyebrow in challenge. "'Cause I know damn well you don't just mean good food and a good bed and time in Baby, not simple wants like that. You mean—ya know, the big things, the wants we didn't get to have before."

"Yes," Cas agrees. "If you're not sure, figure it out."

"Easier said than done."

Reasons to read this:

Dean reads a story that ends like despair and his reaction is FUCK THAT

Cas wears Dean's hoodie

Jack is a toddler

The Jack and Claire sibling energy we deserve

Eileen being awesome and pulling pranks with Dean while Sam thinks she's an angel

Sam knows

YOUR HONOR THEY'RE IN LOVE

First Date by aeli_kindara Words: 8,968 Chapters: 1

“We should go on a date. You and me.”

Castiel wishes he could see Dean’s face. He wishes he had any idea what to say.

“I’m asking you out, Cas.”

Also known as the Dean Winchester makes the first move fic.

season 14

Broken Road by thegeminisage Words: 109,629 Chapters: 7

A 14.13 Lebanon rewrite. When Dean uses a wish-granting pearl to try and kill the archangel Michael before he can escape the cage in Dean's head, they instead wind up with a newly-resurrected John Winchester.

It's been more than a decade since John died, and a lot has changed: Mary is alive, Sam and Dean have what passes for a proper home in the Men of Letters Bunker, and they're living with angels. John doesn't know angels are real, he doesn't know about the fragile new relationship between Dean and Castiel, and most of all, he doesn't know that Dean said yes to Michael, or that Dean's plan to defeat Michael would send him to a fate worse than death.

Now Dean must contend with both his father asking questions he can't answer, and his loved ones learning about the darker truths of his childhood, all while constantly battling the archangel trapped inside him. But Dean coming to terms with his history may be the difference between this being the beginning of a journey—or the end.

post season 15

fools and pilgrims by lagaudiere Words: 31,904 Chapters: 2

Claire shows up at the bunker a day before Dean was planning to leave, with her hair cut short and a fresh tattoo on her left arm under a bandage. Chuck is dead, Jack has given up his godlike powers, and Cas is back from the Empty, which doesn't make it any easier for Dean to talk to him. Suddenly finding himself in a world without monsters, supernatural forces, or any need for hunters, Dean's solution is to go on a road trip. Claire tags along.

Dean-Claire mirror fic post Despair

what's missing is found (our souls can exhale now) by sobsicles Words: 27,403

It's not the first time Claire has ever gone missing. It is, however, the first time Kaia panics about it. Dean's dragged into the mess, but he soon finds that it's the best thing that could have happened to him.

canon(?) au (Hunters and Men of Letters)

Dean Winchester's Secret (Angel) Boyfriend by reluctantabandon, Winter_of_our_Discontent Words: 11,191 Chapters: 1

Dean Winchester isn't exactly a team player. So when he starts mentioning a new Hunting partner, Ellen and Jo Harvelle aren't sure whether they should be worried or relieved.

But they're starting to get the feeling there's something important Dean's not telling them about Cas...

Shot Through The Heart by peanutbutterjelly-pie (Aleakim) Words: 11,191 Chapters: 1

Dean is a hunter.

Castiel is a Man of Letters.

And even though they have to work together on a regular basis, there is not much sympathy between them. Castiel thinks Dean too brash and reckless while Dean in return sees nothing more in the other man than a rude asshole with an obsessive love for books and a truly terrible fashion sense.

But fate clearly has a funny way of throwing those two together over and over again.

And somewhere along the way feelings change into something neither of them would have expected.

#destiel #deancas #fic recs

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mattzerella-sticks · 4 years

Text

Sunrise (Dean/Cas coda to 15x19 “Inherit the Earth”, 1.7k)

(ao3 link)

Dean and Sam were free. Finally, unequivocally, free.

But this wasn't the happy ending Dean had expected. Maybe in the past, having Sam in the passenger seat tearing across an open stretch of highway as the sunsets, it'd be what he wanted. But that was years ago. He's not that man anymore. Dean's tired of sunsets, of saying goodbye. He yearns for a different ending. One that's less of an ending, and more of a beginning. A sunrise instead of a sunset.

Sam has his. Dean lost his. Despite this setback, he won't stop. He'll live in memory of his sunrise.

Except, what can he do when he feels those rays on his face again?

Early morning sunlight streams through half-closed motel window blinds, striking Dean directly on his face. Stir him from unconsciousness, shuffling Dean out of his dreams. Warm blue and familiar stubble replaced with an ugly, orange patterned wallpaper that makes his stomach unhappily flip. Groaning, he turns. Hopes he can reclaim his quickly fading fantasy. It escapes his grasp, Dean left in the loneliness of reality.

Truly. He checks Sam’s bed, finding it unoccupied. “Figures…”

They crossed paths with Eileen coincidentally. Not like Sam’s pointed questions and giant thumbs hid his intentions. Even his terrible acting (“Eileen? What are the odds of you being here?”) couldn’t throw him off. Dean played along, however, letting them think he was in the dark. Knew exactly why his brother and his brother’s girlfriend hadn’t told Dean about this. Salt only hurts a wound that’s fresh and open. While badly healed, Dean’s grown numb to that missing chunk of his heart. More pained that his sadness made his loved ones go behind his back, act in guilt.

Sam and Eileen don’t deserve shadows because of his pain.

Which is why he’s happy for them. Left the bar so they can chat without his presence. Catch up, let Sam tell her about those kitschy tourist traps they’ve been hopping between since Chuck’s defeat. Show pictures of Dean in an upside-down house, Sam’s head peeking out from corn fields. Hold hands. Sit on the same side of the booth. Kiss, without worrying if Dean is steadily killing his liver at the bar because of them.

Drinking lost its flavor anyhow.

Free from Chuck’s influences, Dean decided he might cut a few more strings. Namely beer. He’ll enjoy a bottle every now and then but, reflecting on it, booze never offered comfort he really needed. Only aggravated a different sort of hurt, distracting him for a while. He abandoned those distractions. Instead of asking their bartender from last night, with his tanned skin and wavy, blond hair, for whiskey, neat, until he dropped, Dean stood from their table and paid his tab. Carried his longing out the exit, drove with it, laid down in his bed and held it close. Hugged it, imagining his arms. Praise whispered in his ear, about choosing a different way. A better way. A healthier way.

Cas would be proud of him. Prouder than he already is. And Dean… felt the same.

Rising, Dean stretches. Winces as a new disc pops and cracks in his back, “Motels ain’t what they used to be…” He throws his legs over the side, scrunching his toes in the shag carpet. Smiling, “But at least some things’ll never change…”

It’s going to be a slow morning. Dean doubts Sam will swing by before noon, meaning he has hours to kill. First, he leisurely showers. Scrubs at his scalp with gentle scratches, humming Zeppelin under his breath. Keening ‘A Whole Lotta Love’s chorus, coming into his hand. Lets that melody fade while water makes his come sluice off his hand, into the drain. He switches tracks, dries himself while softly singing ‘Going to California’. Thinks about their next destination. All those beaches he and Sam plan on visiting. Finally making good on their promise.

Not how he always envisioned it, but…

Dean drapes the towel around his neck, staring at his reflection. Marks new wrinkles he hadn’t noticed, gray hairs where dirty blond were. Sees how small his eyebags shrank.

Sleeping was surprisingly easy. Some days Dean wished it weren’t. Others, it’s his only chance at being with him again.

“Nope,” he says, leaving the bathroom. Jumping out from the mirror. “Not going there… not this early…”

He bides his time dressing, debating where he should get breakfast. Wonders if a diner they passed entering town might serve pie as he hops into his jeans. Waffles between a t-shirt or purple-and-blue plaid while rubbing deodorant on. Then, tugging his tee’s thin fabric over his head, he decides he isn’t that hungry. Can eat later, Sam driving so he can attack snacks he squirrelled away when they last stopped for gas.

Knock Knock Knock

“Sam?” Dean asks, glancing at the door. No one answers. “Sam is that you? You forget your keys or…” He checks his phone. Nothing.

Knock Knock Knock

“Sam, if that’s you – this isn’t funny.” He grabs for his socks, sitting on the end of his bed. “Pulling a poor joke on your brother, leaving your girlfriend alone in bed… shame on you.”

Knock Knock Knock

Dean squeezes his socks, glaring at the door. His irritation fades, weirdly, the longer he stares. Replaced with a different feeling, comforting. Without needing to, Dean guesses it’s not Sam on that other side. Tossing his socks, Dean stands and slowly inches forward. Drawn by gravity, a name perched atop his tongue. Waiting there, scared of being spoken. Of being wrong. He doesn’t feel wrong.

Is this still a dream, he asks himself. Did I actually wake up? Dean waits, hovering near the doorknob. Remembers rushing last time, what waited there then. What he almost threw himself onto. Cycles through who might be waiting now. Something worse, a more terrifying monster. Or maybe mundane, like the motel manager. He’ll never know if he drags it out. Whether that’s motivation or warning, Dean can’t decide. What he does choose is flinging open that door and facing whoever was there.

“Hello, Dean.”

“Cas -?” Dean gasps, knees buckling. Laughing, he leans his weight on the door. Grins wide enough his cheeks must splinter, twin tracks of tears already spilled over. “Cas, is that…” He coughs, wiping at his mouth. “Is that really you?”

Like nothing happened, Cas crosses the threshold. Dressed spectacularly… normal. Trench coat, suit jacket, and white button-down paired with his crooked blue tie. Dean’s hand drifts close but can’t touch. Not yet. “It is me,” he tells Dean, “you… probably have a lot of questions. About why I’m here, and – and what was said when the Empty…”

Of course, there are questions. None were as important as Dean snatching Cas’s tie, dragging him into a heated embrace. “Later,” he promises, closing the door. Guiding Cas onto his bed. Falling, his angel’s body collapsing atop his. Weight proving further and further how real this is.

He’s back!

“I can’t believe…” Dean kisses along Cas’s neck, threading his fingers through hairs resting at his angel’s nape. Feeds a fire burning across his body, flames roaring with a desire for more. “Can’t believe I could be this lucky…”

Cas chuckles, “Good things do happen, Dean.”

“Never to us.” Pausing, Dean tears his eyes from the dip of Cas’s collarbone and to his face. “I searched, Cas. I did. Back when it was me, and Sam, and Jack, I did everything I could but I… there wasn’t any lore. Nothing about contacting the Empty, breaking through I – how?”

Shifting, Cas rolls off Dean and onto his side. No sooner than it started, those flames eating at Dean’s insides tempered. Became a more manageable heat, containable. Dean tucked himself against Cas’s chest, hearing his heartbeat. Awed from that simple rhythm it gives. Lulls Dean with a gentle song. “Jack,” Cas explains. Rubs Dean’s shoulder, along where his handprint was. Teased the edges of his tee, part of his memorial tattoo revealed. Cas traces his palm outline. “In fixing Chuck’s mistakes, he… he mounted a rescue mission from Heaven.”

“For you?”

“For everyone.” Cas kisses Dean’s crown, continuing his story. Whispers it into his head. “All the angels. Jack rescued us all.”

“Everyone?” Dean asks, “Meaning… Michael? Gabriel?”

“Uriel, Balthazar, Anna, Hannah, Metatron – even Lucifer.”

“What the hell?”

“He was fixing what Chuck wasted. Saved Heaven,” he says, “Gave everyone a second chance, to do right by humanity. Be its guardians like we were supposed to be. And…” Cas lays his hand where it belongs, Dean shivering from contact. Wraps his arms tighter around his angel’s waist. “Jack offered me all my powers back, and then some. Said I could be his archangel… second-in-command, in all of Heaven.”

Dean lifts his head, frowning. Studies Cas with a suspicious wrinkle creasing his brow. He deflates somewhat, disappointment rocking into him like heavy waves. Routine. Expected, since Cas was exactly where he wanted. But then, isn’t that answer enough? Dean asks regardless. “Did you take it?”

“I thanked him for the offer,” Cas says, “however my place was elsewhere, here on Earth… with you.” His hand moves, cupping Dean’s cheek. Thumb brushes his lip. “And when our time comes, I’ll rejoin Heaven at your side.”

Cas’s heartbeat makes sense, now. It never did that before.

“We’ve got a long time before we croak, Cas,” Dean jokes, crawling higher up his bed. Enough that he can press their foreheads together. “You think you can handle it?”

“I waited millennia to meet you, and then years just so I can hold you like this.” Cas closes the distance, capturing Dean’s lips. “I’m hoping our future is excruciatingly slow.”

“Our future…” He relaxes, allowing a few more kisses before he starts again. “Y’know, I… I thought I’d never get to say that. Figured, after Jack took the reigns from Chuck, this was all we’d get and – and having everyone back was nice. But you weren’t there, and I hurt. When you died, I wanted to sit there and let myself waste away and join you. Except if I did, you’d be so angry and – that’s what’s been keeping me going. You loved me so much – and were pained whenever I was… I couldn’t do that to myself. Punishing myself wouldn’t be fair. So I thought about my future, how I can live it for those I loved. Be there… the person I’ve become, and not who I used to be. But now…”

“Now you can be a little selfish,” Cas says. “We can be selfish.” He tickles Dean’s chin, hands roving across his body. “What should we do, for the first day of the rest of our lives?”

Dean doesn’t dawdle. “I want to lay here,” he says, “Lay here the whole day, in your arms, telling you how much I love you.”

“…I don’t see any problems with that.”

Neither did Dean, which is why he suggested it. They fix themselves, first. Cas sheds most of his outer layers, leaving himself only in his boxers. Dean hurls his jeans off fast, jumping under the covers. Giddy as Cas joins him, both men facing each other. Hands joined above their sheets, Cas’s palm fitting perfectly.

“Well?” Cas arches his brow, “How much do you love me?”

Dean kisses him, ruining it by smiling too hard. “I love you too much, and not enough.”

#supernatural #spn #spn15 #15x19 #15x19 inherit the earth #15x19 coda #supernatural fanfiction #spn fanfic #dean winchester #castiel #destiel #deancas #destiel fanfic #deancas fanfic

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shirtlesssammy · 3 years

Text

4x02: Are You There God? It’s Me, Dean Winchester

Then:

Dean Winchester is saved

Now:

Olivia, a hunter, wakes to cold air and flickering lights. She runs for her shotgun just as Bobby leaves a message on her answering machine.

Her EMF is going nuts as she patrols her house. Suddenly ghosts that she recognizes give her the one two punch and she’s a goner.

At Bobby’s, Dean is vehemently denying that he was “groped by an angel.” Bobby’s got lots of lore on angels, though. It seems they’re the only thing that could pull a human soul from Hell.

Sam thinks it’s a good thing that Dean was saved “by one of the good guys.” And Dean wonders if there is a God. BABIES. Dean’s having a hard time believing there’s a god out there that personally believes in him. Oh, buddy, he cares just a little too much, I’d say. Dean’s self-loathing is off the charts though. And this is getting way ahead of myself here, but even though Chuck cares in the sense that Dean is a fun little puppet for him, it’s Cas that really cared all along. He believed in Dean so much, he gave up everything for this man. BIG SIGH.

Dean demands pie before digging into the angel lore.

Sam runs off to forget get the pie, when he sees Ruby lurking. She wants to know if the angel stuff is real. Ruby’s scared for her demon life and takes off.

Sam gets back to Bobby’s in time for all three of them to take off to investigate why Olivia isn’t answering Bobby’s calls. Also, he forgot the pie.

They find Olivia disemboweled on her bedroom floor. And Bobby can’t get a hold of any nearby hunters. They check them out to find everyone dead.

They need to get back to Bobby’s to regroup.

Sam’s getting gas for the Impala while Dean sleeps. He makes a pitstop in the gas station restroom. The room suddenly gets cold and Victor Henrickson appears!

He blames Sam for his death. He starts to attack Sam but Dean comes in with a save and a shotgun.

Bobby meanwhile is haunted by a couple giggling raggedy twin girls. Fun!

Sam and Dean race back to Bobby’s. They can’t get a hold of him so they enter his house with shotguns ready. The boys separate and while Dean checks out the upstairs, Sam heads outside.

Dean runs into the ghost of the woman who was once Meg Masters.

She blames Dean for her possession...and Dean hates himself enough to actually believe it all. It wasn’t your fault, dude. Also, as much as they’ve learned about demon possession and all, if they would have met Meg at any point in the future, they would have just stabbed her with Ruby’s knife and she’d be dead anyway. Idk, saving people is good in theory, but hard in practice for these guys. I also know this is a manipulation. “Do you know what it’s like to be ridden for a month by pure evil?” HE DOES! Leave him alone!

Meanwhile, Sam’s trying to find Bobby outside. He’s currently being held down by a couple scary ghost twins.

Ghost of Meg continues to taunt Dean, and pins her sister’s suicide on him as well. MEG. NO.

Outside, Sam finds Bobby trapped in an old scrap car. He helps break him out and together they swing iron through the ghost girls.

Dean drags himself away from Meg, and aims his gun at the iron chandelier up above. DAMN BOBBY that’s some fancy light fixture work! The chandelier smokes Meg out...for now.

Back in Bobby’s living room, they realize that all the ghosts had a brand on their hands. Bobby hauls out the lore and leads the Winchesters down to...dun dun DUN...his safe room.

We get the grand tour because this is the FIRST TIME WE’VE SEEN IT. This safe room has everything! Iron! Salt! Devil’s traps! Lore! Racy posters! Booze! Weapons! The vanished hopes and dreams of Dean Winchester! A cot complete with restraints! The Winchesters are impressed.

Later, Dean breaks into a theological monologue while making salt bullets. My sweet sunshine! How dare you speak my love language! “If [God] doesn't exist...fine. Bad crap happens to good people. That's how it is. There's no rhyme or reason - just random, horrible, evil. I get it, okay? I can roll with that. But if he is out there, what's wrong with him? Where the hell is he while all these decent people are getting torn to shreds? How does he live with himself? You know, why doesn't he help?” (Because, sweetie, freedom is a length of rope and God LITERALLY wants you to hang yourself with it.)

Bobby finds the brand - it’s the “mark of the witness.” They’re ghosts forced to rise and destroy people. In fact, the Rising of the Witnesses is part of an ancient prophecy. A prophecy of...DOOM. It’s a sign of the apocalypse. Dean suggests coping with a series of wish-fulfillment trips including: Grand Canyon, Star Trek Experience, and the Bunny Ranch. Somebody please write me that fic. Instead of Dean’s plan, Bobby suggests running an ancient ritual to shut down the witnesses. To do so, they first have to race out of the panic room to gather ingredients before the ghosts have a chance to yank their insides outside.

Ronald from the bank heist greets them at the stairs. Bobby blasts away Dean’s guilt ghost for him, and we cut to a montage of spell preparation. The three of them split up to fetch supplies. Ghosts appear to torment them.

Meg appears to Sam, only she KNOWS more than she should. She knows about Sam’s fraternization with Ruby.

In the kitchen, Victor appears to Dean. He reveals that after the Winchesters left, Lilith gruesomely tortured those left in the station for almost an hour before blowing up the place. While Dean absorbs this fun fact, Victor makes his move, plunging his hand into Dean’s chest.

Sam saves Dean just in time with a well-aimed salt round. They start the ritual, Bobby’s living room teeming with ghosts. Bobby chants while the Winchesters play shotgun whack-a-mole with the ghosts. Meg jabs a hand into Bobby’s chest. Bobby drops the bowl and Dean dives for it like it’s a football, then tosses the spell into the fire to finish the job.

That night, Dean wakes from his slumber.

Castiel stands waiting for him (watching him sleep??) in the kitchen. He congratulates Dean on their triumph over the witnesses, and announces that he has already started doodling Mister Castiel Winchester in his notebooks!

Dean feels a little raw about nearly dying (again) and wonders why angels are total dicks. “Read the bible,” Cas advises. “Angels are warriors of God.” Oh, and also? He’s not here to PERCH ON DEAN’S SHOULDER. Oh honey sweetie baby.

Dean tries to read Cas the riot act and rails against God’s shitty parenting.

Cas: The lord works…

Dean: If you say "mysterious ways" so help me, I will kick your ass

Cas warns Dean that big...no, cosmic things are afoot.

The Rising of the Witnesses is one of sixty-six seals that Lilith is busily unlocking. Each seal is a lock holding Lucifer in his cage. Dean has trouble believing that Lucifer is even REAL. Sassy Cas smiles. “Three days ago you thought there was no such thing as me.”

Cas tells Dean that Heaven isn’t infinite. Angels have died in the battle so far, and more may be at risk. (Excuse me while I weep for the next twelve seasons. There have been 0 days since the last angel mishap.)

“You think the armies of Heaven should just follow you around?” Cas asks, telegraphing his series story arc. “You should show me some respect. I dragged you out of Hell. I can throw you back in.” Cas flaps out.

Dean wakes up for realsies. WAS IT ALL A DREAM? He asks Sam if he believes in the Devil…

You Should Show Me Some Quotes:

All I know is I was not groped by an angel

If there is a God out there, why would he give a crap about me?

When have I ever forgotten the pie?

Where’s the pie?

I thought angels were supposed to be guardians. Fluffy wings, halos -- you know, Michael Landon. Not dicks

Want to read more? Check out our Recap Archive!

#spn recap #dean winchester #sam winchester #castiel #cas #bobby singer #spn 4x02 #Are you there God It's me Dean Winchester #Victor Henriksen #ronald reznick #meg masters #supernatural season 4

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supernaturallyobsessedchic · 3 years

Text

Emergency! Part 5

Part 5 – Rattlesnake

Summary: A rollover crash has multiple squads responding to rescue, clean up and investigate the cause. During clean up Dean is bitten by a rattlesnake. An earthquake strikes, being the largest L.A has ever experienced since the 90’s. And the reader, was out shopping when it happened, trapping her under debris. Jack’s father is at Rampart for an operation, staff, and squad 51 learn of how toxic of a Father Lucifer is.

Warnings: Scary Situations, Suspense, implied Smut, Fluff, Brief toxic parent angst, long one full of suspense and action!

Word Count: 4,233

Square: Girls Night (There is a girls night in here, and I’m using it to fill my square for @supernatural-jackles Tell me a story bingo)

Bingo Masterlist

Main Masterlist

Series Masterlist

Mobile Masterlist

a/n: this takes place a year or so after Virus. This story is going to be a long one.

“Would it be a miracle that people were actually careful and safe?” Gabe says, walking into the stations kitchen.

“One could only dream.” Cas says.

“Who’s turn is it for making lunch?”

“It’s either the father or the son.” Michael says.

“It’s my turn for lunch nimrod.” Dean says, playfully getting Gabe in playful chock hold while rubbing his knocks on his head.

Gabe struggles to get out of the Winchester’s grip.

Dean let go with little protest.

“He’s the one that did the father and son crack.” Gabe whined.

“Yeah but Dean knows not to mess with me.”

“You are just as bad as Sam with the pranks.”

“How is little bro by the way?” Gabe asks.

“He’s good, won his first case at a firm downtown. Can’t remember the name of it. And he and Jess are actually getting married by the end of this year.”

“Oh it’s about time that kid popped the question.” Michael says.

“Yeah, he and Jess are coming down for Thanksgiving, they’ll meet Y/N…”

“Have you ever met Y/N’s family yet?”

“She doesn’t talk about her family much. I don’t push her if she’s not comfortable with it.”

The stations alarm goes off.

“Station 51, rollover accident…” The dispatcher giving the location as the station jumped into action.

They got to the location, on the winding dirt road in the mountains outside of LA. Seeing the car that rolled over the guard rail and down the slope.

“What do we got?” John asked the other station that responded.

The captain wearing a big white 20 on his helmet.

“Rollover, driver’s unconscious and we don’t know his condition.”

“I’ll send my paramedics on it.”

Dean and Cas getting their supplies and rushing to the car.

They recorded his vitals on their notepads.

“Cas go relay it to Rampart, I’ll stay here with him.”

“Got it.”

“Rampart squad 51. Rampart this is squad five one.”

Bobby happened to be by the radio.

“Go ahead 51.”

“Rampart, we have a rollover accident, the victim is trapped in the car. Vitals are, BP 120 over 79, pulse rate 78. Pupils dilated and sluggish.”

“Can you get the victim out without using the jaws?”

“Negative Rampart, driver side door is jammed.”

“Then start an IV, just have some normal saline to keep him hydrated. Can’t risk a head injury going unnoticed. Follow protocol, and we’ll be waiting for you.”

“10-4 Rampart.”

A little over a half hour passed and they managed to get the victim out of the car and in an ambulance and is on the way to the hospital.

Cas and Dean were packing up the squad.

“Shit, forgot the drug box by the car, I’ll be right back.” Dean says.

“’kay.”

Dean jogged down the hill to the car to pick up the drug box when he heard a rattle.

His heart sank.

Where was it?

It wasn’t until he saw the danger noodle jump at the moment he picked up the drug box, biting down on his arm. Then latching on.

Dean managed to calmly grab the snake by the head, forcing it’s mouth open. Getting it to release him and he threw the snake far.

He grabbed his radio.

“Station 51, it’s Dean. I just got bit by a rattlesnake.”

He quickly worked his belt off his waist to make himself a tourniquet.

“Gabe, Kevin, get down there now!” John ordered.

They hurried down the hill to Dean’s aid.

Earlier that day…

“Alright that’s the last of them.” Y/N says to herself as she got all settled in Dean’s house.

They had just recently took things to the next level and she has moved in with him. She was off work taking the time to finish settling in. But Dean’s 24 hour shift just started, so Dean was away at work, saving people.

“Now, a girls night…er, day.” She says, knowing who to call to hang out with for the day.

She pulls out her phone, calling up a few girls she knows and knows they’re off.

“Hey Donna, you up for a girls night?”

“Oh hell ya girlfriend, who’s all gonna be there?”

“Well, you, me, Rowena the overnight RN, Jody. I want to invite Charlie, a friend of Dean’s but I think she’s working.”

“Girl, I can’t wait! You want me to meet you at your place or Dean’s?”

“I just finished moving in with Dean, I’m at Dean’s. You can meet me at Dean’s.” She explained.

“Oh, ho-ho-ho, girl, we need to catch up!”

The girl was full of energy and Y/N could feel it through the phone.

“Yes we do, see you here in a few, and I’ll call the others.” She says, hanging up.

The doorbell rang hours later calling the girls. She opens the door.

“Hi!” Donna cheers, holding two cases of beer.

“You know how to party, Charlie’s off today she’s on her way with some wine as well.” Y/N says letting her in. Closing the door behind her.

“Oh, I like her already.”

“Jody got caught up with a Drunk Driver and won’t make it. But Rowena is coming so it’s just us four.”

“Still a good girls night, so what else are we doing tonight?”

“Probably catch up a bit, binge some Netflix shows. The Witcher season 2 is coming out soon and I want to rewatch that.”

“Oh, Geralt can hunt me down any day.”

“You do realize the man is hundreds of years old?”

“Yeah, but Henry Cavil isn’t.” she winks.

Y/N rolls her eyes with a giggle.

The doorbell rang shortly after revealing Rowena. And moments later, Charlie.

“You two are so going to get married.” Donna says, downing her second bottle of beer.

“He really is, really sweet, kind and the perfect kind of guy for me. He knows my schedule. And I know his. We both were scared the hours of our work would mess things up. But with how many times the man gets hurt on the job while I’m working I am always assuming he’s purposely getting hurt just so he can see me at work.”

Charlie giggling. “I see that being a thing he does.”

Rowena sipping away at the red wine Charlie brought.

“Ro, how are things with you girl?” Y/N asked.

“Oh, you know. Saving people, taking names…”

“She’s in love.” Donna deadpans.

Rowena rolls her eyes with a smirk.

Y/N gasps. “What’s his name?”

“His name is Arthur Ketch, he the neurologist up on Fourth Floor. He works under Singer.”

“Oh I know of him, I mean, Bobby is planning on retiring and isn’t Ketch supposed to take his place?”

Rowena nods with a hum. Still having a playful smirk on her face.

“Oh you are so in love with him.” Y/N says with a smile.

“He may have taken me out on a date a few days ago and we have another date tomorrow night.”

“Ro, I’m so happy for you!”

“Thank you sweetie, and I’m happy for you and Dean, don’t let that one go darling.”

“I don’t see that happening, just as long he stays safe on a job. I’m worried of him getting seriously hurt on the job. I mean that virus a year ago, that really scared me. I thought I was gonna lose him.”

The girls nod, understanding.

“Anyone up for some hot guys and monsters!” Donna says, entering the room with a glass generously full of red wine.

“Girl, you’re gonna regret the headache the next day.”

“I’m off work tomorrow, so if I get a migraine I’m good!” she says chuckling.

The girls rolling their eyes at their friend.

“Rowena, would you be able to drive her home?”

“Yes, she’s at least on the way home for me.”

“Thank you, last thing I want is to give poor Jody another drunk to worry about.”

“At least I’m the fun kind of drunk.” Donna says, getting the Witcher on Y/N’s TV screen.

“Ro, drive safe!”

“Will do sweetie, have a good rest of your night!” Rowena says, escorting a silly drunk Donna to her car.

“I’ll drive her car home tomorrow.” Y/N offers.

“Will do darling, goodnight!”

“Night!”

“Y/N that was the most fun I’ve had, never thought of you to be the nerdy type.”

“Oh, I’m a nerd in disguise if anything.” Y/N winks.

“Ugh, why are you straight!”

“Not sure.”

Y/N’s pocket happens to vibrate at that moment.

“Hello?”

“Y/N?” Hearing Dr. Kline’s voice on the other end.

“What’s up Jack?”

“It’s Dean, he’s been bit by a rattlesnake, he’s on his way in on the top of Engine 51.”

“I’m on my way.” Y/N says, not hesitating grabbing her keys to her car. Hanging up the phone quickly from him.

“I’m going with you sweetie.” Charlie says, following y/n to her car.

Turning the keys she turns on her emergency flashers and speeds her way to Rampart hospital.

“Engine 51, what are the patients vitals?” Jack asks.

Dean, takes his own pulse, his own blood pressure. All while Cas drove the squad ahead of the engine.

“Pulse rate, 95. O2 Sat, 98, Respiration 18, BP 120 over 65.”

“Dispatch relay to Engine 51 to start IV using Ringers Lactate.” Jack asks.

“Engine 51, Rampart advises start IV using Ringers Lactate.”

“10-4” Gabe says over the radio.

Dean having heard the radio begins the process to start an IV.

“There goes Engine 51!” Charlie shouts, while Y/N sat at the red light. Seeing the engine tear through the intersection.

Her light happened to turn green for her.

“Hold on.” Y/N says. As she starts pressing on the gas pedal slowly pushing it to the floor. Her tires squealing.

Gabe looked up hearing tires. Looking over the edge, he sees a familiar car.

“Oh shit, his girl is right behind us.” He says.

Dean chuckled. “And I’m the worry wort.”

“Engine 51, Rampart is requesting an update.”

“Relay to Rampart, patient is starting to experience numbness around the mouth, and he’s drowsy.” Dean says on the radio.

“Engine 51 you’re breaking up, please repeat.”

John grabbed the radio.

“Relay to Rampart, Patient is started to experience numbness around the mouth and he’s drowsy.”

“Roger that.” Dispatch says.

“Venom sounded like it hit a vein.” Jack says.

“Y/N’s gonna be so worried.” Meg says. Standing next to Bobby and Jack at the nurses station.

The squad, the engine pulled into the emergency entrance. Y/N pulled into the parking lot near the emergency entrance, finding a spot quickly. She quickly parked it, turned off the car. Jumping out, locking the car. Charlie staying close to her.

Meg stayed by the door, waiting for Y/N and Charlie.

“How’s he doing so far?” Y/N asked.

“We started a skin test with the antivenom. Hopefully he doesn’t have a reaction, that way we can start treatment right away.” Jack says.

“How long do we have to wait?” Y/N asked.

“20 Minutes.”

Y/N and the rest of the members of station 51 nodded, understanding.

“Let’s go wait guys.” Charlie suggested.

Everyone left the room, trying to keep their hopes high despite their shoulders slumped.

As the night came to a close, and he didn’t have a reaction to the antivenom skin test and he has been laying, sound asleep in his room as the antivenom worked it’s magic on him.

Y/N laid in his bed with him, curled into his side. Her head on his chest, listening to the calming rhythm of Dean’s heartbeat.

Dean began to stir awake, feeling a warmth at his side. Waking up a bit more he sees his favorite girl in his life laying at his side.

His arm came up around her, holding her close. Placing a loving sweet kiss atop her head as he fell back asleep, letting the rest and medicine work it’s magic on him.

The next day…

Y/N arrived on time to the hospital to pick up Dean, filling out his discharge papers another patient was being brought in.

“Who’s that?” Dean asks.

“Jack’s dad, he never talks about him.”

“Why is that?”

Jack happened behind them.

“I was adopted, he gave me up when I was, like 5.”

“Jackie, son how are you?” the man asks from the bed.

“You don’t call me son.”

“Since when can a father—”

“You may be my father by blood. But not a true father.”

“What did you expect me to hold your hand? Kiss your booboo’s when you got hurt like some sort of pansy?”

“Oh now I see why.” Dean mutters in Y/N’s ear.

“How long is he gonna be here anyway?” Jack asks the medics that brought him in.

“His cardiologist what’s him to have a pacemaker in today. So he’s gonna be here for a bit.”

Jack groans under his breath.

“I’ll hand him over to someone else?”

“Why do you suck ass?” His father asks.

“Okay, listen here dude.” Y/N steps in.

“Y/N, please—” Jack says.

“No, you can either treat the staff of Rampart emergency with respect or we can and will kick you out for your hostility.” She says.

He shrunk in his bed.

“Will you be on your best behavior or will I have to send you to a different hospital?” she asks.

“I’ll be on my best behavior.”

“Good. And if I hear your antagonizing him, or any more of our staff we will transfer you. And you won’t be welcome here again.”

“Understood.”

“Good.” She says, storming out of the hospital.

“Don’t piss her off, can anyone remind of that?” Dean asks jokingly as he follows her out.

Later on that day…

“Dean, babe, I’m gonna go do some arrands really quick.”

“Alright be safe sweetheart.”

She goes to the living room, where he sat watching Netflix, giving him a quick kiss on his lips. But Dean quickly places a hand on her cheek deepening the kiss. Clearly wanting more.

“Babe, maybe tonight. But I need to head out to stay ahead of traffic.”

“Fine, drive safe baby.”

“Always do!”

“Says the crazy girlfriend chasing a fire engine!”

“I’m not that crazy!” She laughed.

Dean chuckled as he heard her laugh, closing the door behind her.

She pushed her cart around Target getting not only food, but some cute lingerie for that night. Even grabbing Dean something from Spencer’s for them to try in bed later.

She felt the ground tremble slightly. The hairs on her arms stood up on end.

“No not now.” She mutters.

Without warning, the ground shook violently, taking her and other shoppers to the floor. The power going out, items being thrown on the floor. The lights swinging wildly, ceiling tiles falling. They were having a bad earthquake. And she was smacked in the middle of LA, in a multilevel mall.

Meanwhile Dean back at home had just turned off the oven having cooked himself some pizza for lunch after noticing Y/N having ate already.

He heart he windows vibrate, feeling the ground tremble slightly. He stood in the kitchen still yet alert.

When the ground gave way again to another violent shake, but only enough to cause their dishes to fall off the countertop, the cupboard doors swinging open and closed. The TV rocking back and forth on the stand. Dean dived to the table to get under it, and wait it out.

Meanwhile back at Target, screaming shoppers can be heard throughout more than just Target.

Once the shaking had calmed down, she knew they had to get out immediately.

She quickly pulled out her phone. Seeing the alert had gone off.

An 7.5 earthquake.

“How big was that?” someone asks.

“I don’t know but that was big!” someone else shouts.

“My phone says 7.5, it was big enough.” Y/N shouts.

“Oh god, we’re dead!”

“Okay, Okay, don’t panic, we just have to get out of here before the aftershocks kick in.” Y/N suggests.

“Where can we go, we’re on the top floor!”

“At one part of the mall this is the ground floor, we just have to find another one of the exits. Avoid the escalators, we have to get out before the floor collapses on us.” She explains.

“I’m with her.”

“Oh my god! Someone help me!”

Bring on the victims. She thought.

“I’m a nurse, what’s wrong!” Y/N shouts.

“It’s my husband, he’s bleeding!”

She ran to the panicked woman.

“Where at?” she asks.

“His leg, a shard of glass from the wine cut him.”

She examines his leg.

“Do you have a belt sir?”

He nods.

“Let’s get it off of you and make a tourniquet.” She says.

Y/N helps him get his belt off and works on tying it above the cut on his leg. Not too tight but tight enough.

“Okay, do you got him?” she asks the man’s wife.

“Yes, but where---”

“I came in from the ground level entrance, it’s a ways north, we just go this way.” She pointed out.

“You make it sound so easy, how are you so calm?”

“I’m an emergency nurse at Rampart.”

“You’re so amazing, thank you, thank you so much.”

“You’re welcome, now lets get out of here.”

“Alright everyone, you can follow me, the ground level entrance is this way.” Y/N shouts.

And she began leading the herd.

“Do you hear that?” Someone asked in the Food quart.

“Oh shit, they didn’t turn off the gas.” Y/N muttered.

“GET AWAY FROM THE FOOD QUART!” She shouts.

Just as the people ran in a panic out of the doors near the food quart leading to one of the parking lots out on the ground level, an explosion of fire broke out in a couple of the restaurants in the food quart.

“We’re dead!” a number of people shouted.

“We’ll get out of this, just stay calm and follow me!” Y/N encouraged. As she and everyone behind her, around her, all shielded themselves from the fire.

Dean, in his car sped his way to station 51.

“It’s all hands on deck, there’s fires everywhere.” John says as Dean entered the station.

“Y/N’s at the mall.”

“Which one?”

“The one off of Center Pointe.”

“Shit, that’s one of our calls. Get suited up, and lets go.”

As the alarm goes off in the station, Dean hurries to the squad, grabbing his fireman’s bottoms and coat.

“I got your boots and mine, lets go!” Cas says, getting in the passenger.

Dean not wasting anytime, turns on the squad and follows the engine out of the station, speeding towards the shopping center.

“Are we there yet?” a little girl asks.

“Almost there sweetheart, we just have to---”

“Wait!” someone pulls Y/N back.

Y/N grabbing the man’s arm noticing a drop.

“The floor caved in…shit, that’s what I was worried about.”

“Oh, now what!?”

She looked around, finding another way through the store down below.

“Look there’s an exit down there.”

“But it leads to the underground parking.”

“Still it’s a way out, just wait here then, there’s an incline here, I’ll just climb down and see how far the exit is from the underground parking.” Y/N says, determined to get these people out and out alive.

Sliding down the concrete ramp, she jogs through the store, climbing through a fissure in the wall, seeing the garage not perfect but from where she was there was a path closest to the building leading out to daylight.

She hurries back to the scared people.

“There’s a straightforward path outside from here, come on, if we hurry---”

The ground began to shake, throwing her off balance.

“Oh no it’s an aftershock!” someone shouted.

The engine managed to get to the shopping mall, seeing a fire in one section. Coming to a stop they can feel the aftershocks.

“Shit, we have to hurry, Dean, Cas, find a way in. Kevin, Michael, find us some water!” John ordered.

Dean taking the squad closer to the building, scoping out a way in.

“We could try there.” Cas suggested.

“It doesn’t look too structurally sound Cas.”

“It’s holding up so far.”

“True. Okay, but lets find a plan B.”

“And C.”

“And D.”

“I hear sirens!” Someone shouted.

“Come on, the opening is still here!” Y/N shouted.

“Go on baby, mommy and daddy are right behind you.” A pair of parent said to the small girl.

She slid down the concrete ramp, looking scared and timid but Y/N stood by close until her parents met up with her.

“Okay, keep it going, we’re almost out of here!” Y/N encouraged.

It seemed to be going smoothly, everyone was starting to rush down the ram and running outside, frantically.

“Dean look!” Cas shouted as Dean made a loop around the Mall.

“That’s a good sign, okay, let’s help them.” Dean says, bring the squad to a stop.

“Engine 51, this is squad 51, Cap, there’s an couple of entrances above ground that are stable, but we found one by the underground parking, a large number of survivors are coming out.”

“Copy that.” John says.

“Anyone hurt!” Cas asked as he got out.

A number of people saying their fine, scared. A select few coming forward with injuries of cuts.

“Good job miss on making that tourniquet.” Dean commented.

“Oh, I didn’t do that, a nice lady, a nurse from Rampart did it.”

Dean’s heart dropped. Y/N was in there.

“Did you see her?” Dean asked. Unable to hide the panic look in his face.

“We ran right past her, she led us out that way.”

“Atta girl, Cas you got them?” Dean asked.

“I got them, go.” Cas says as he attends to the couple.

Dean got to the opening and he could see a familiar figure in the dark dusty parking lot.

“Y/N!”

“Dean!” she shouts, turning to find him in the opening.

People still trinkling out. Dean helping them out the best he could.

“You hurt!”

“No, I’m fine, just help them!”

What started as a light tremble got slightly stronger, another aftershock.

“Oh fuck, Y/N hurry up!” Dean shouted.

Y/N hurried the people out. And just as she was making her way to Dean she heard a puppy barking. Stopping her dead in her tracks. She began to search for it.

A puppy scurried out from under a car with a limp, barking fearfully.

“It’s okay baby, I got you.” She says, hurrying to the scared puppy. Looking at it’s paw. Seeing a shard of glass in one of it’s paw pads.

“Poor thing, I got you.” She says.

She heard a crack in the concrete. All of a sudden the ceiling looking closer and feeling a lot closer. She fell on her rear, the ceiling seemed like it didn’t want to stop.

No. she prayed.

The after shock stopping just as soon as it started, the ceiling stopped.

“Y/N! Please say something!”

“I’m okay!” she shouts.

The concrete already sounding unstable, she hurries, crawling on all fours with the puppy in her hand, she even brings her feet into the crawling.

Like a domino effect, the ceiling begins to collapse.

A little girl stopped by one of the cars, scared, crying. Not stopping, she grabs the girl by the arm, and continues to crawl.

“Run guys, run!” Dean chants.

“Keep going sweetie, keep running!” Y/N tells the little girl.

The girl being the first out, dives into Dean’s arms.

“I gotchu sweetheart!” Dean tells her.

Y/N making a dive out, landing on her back with the pupping in her chest as the parking lot collapses behind her in a cloud of dust.

Y/N got up, still holding the puppy, trembling in her arms, licking her graciously on her neck. As if it was thanking her for saving her.

Dean stood by the squad, consoling the child, sees Y/N walking with a puppy in her arms. Panting from the adrenaline. Hurries to her, engulfs her in his arms.

“Are you okay?” he asks.

“I’m fine.”

“You go to Target and you come back with a puppy.” He smirks.

“I couldn’t resist, he was cute!” Y/N giggles.

“So far, everyone’s okay, in one piece, little girl’s back with her parents.” Dean informs her.

“That’s good.”

“Is it me or does danger just seem to find us?”

“Something.”

The next day…

“Come here Tremor!” Y/N coaxes.

The Basset Hound Puppy running over, his ears flopping in the wind. Making Y/N giggle.

“Good boy!”

“I’m home!” Dean shouts from the house.

“Go get daddy boy!” she encourages. The puppy making a mad dash for Dean. Only to trip on his ears in the run. Earning a laugh from Dean and Y/N.

“It’s okay buddy, I gotchya!” Dean says, meeting the puppy halfway, and picking him up.

The puppy showering Dean in licks.

“Been good for mommy.”

“Still working on potty training, he peed in the house, that’s why I opened it up.”

“Eh, it’s a learning progress for the little dude.”

“Yeah, so, how was work today?”

“Oh, same old. Rescued a cat from a tree, saved a heart attack victim. The usual.” Dean jokes.

Y/N giggling. Giving him a kiss on the lips. Only for him to deepen it, the puppy getting jealous and licking both of them.

“Okay, Tremor, we get it.” Dean goes.

“And I owe someone some sexy fun time tonight.” Y/N says playfully as she heads back inside.

“Yes you do.” Dean says. Following her at her heels.

A/N: How did you like it? I’m so glad my block is gone and I was able to cook this up. Let me know how you liked it! Feedback is always appreciated! :3

Dean Girls:

@pandazombie69, @luci-in-trenchcoats, @supernatural-jackles, @becs-bunker, @jayankles, @jeaniespiehs20, @mlovesstories, @winchesters-favorite-girl, @flamencodiva, @megzdoodle, @lyarr24, @akshi8278, @anotherspnfanfic

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atlascas · 4 years

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DEANCAS FIC REC

(last updated 7/1)

FINALLY. this is like. just a place for me to rec and write excessively abt the fics i've been reading lately. it won't be organized but it WILL be very earnest and i'll keep it updated as i find/remember more. also i have obnoxiously high standards when it comes to fic so these ARE the cream of the crop, if u will. the god tier. the s tier.

very loosely organized into "newer fic" and "classics." these are subjective categories. do what you will

✨ = new fic on the list

💖 = in my brain rent free!

CURRENTLY READING

these are the fics that i’m currently reading! may or may not get recced. usually i read the first couple paragraphs/lines and if i like the writing it gets bookmarked and put on this list.

lazarus needs a robe of scarlet thread by herrosesneverfall, 90k, canonverse au. dean starts getting stigmata. when i was getting back into spn there were a LOT of religious fics flying around bc that was the Hot Topic of Discussion. this was one of them

Three weeks ago, Dean woke up in a pine box. He thought dealing with the nightmares was going to be the most difficult part of his new life after Hell, but at least they were something he could understand. Something he could deal with. Something he deserved.

Then he began having agonizing visions of crucifixion. Wounds appeared on his body out of nowhere. Wounds that refused to heal and coated his skin with the sickly sweet smell of roses.

Stigmata are said to be the marks of saints, but Dean is not a saint and the wounds are only the beginning.

kingdom come by ahurston, 8.7k, coda to 15x18. cas gets to go home. im gathering all the s15 fix-its to my heart and holding them close

Cas wakes up on the coast of Maine. He makes his way home.

hunger by ellispark, 10.8k, s13 au. dean grieves cas, post s12 finale. perfect writing perfect awful heartwrenching characterization so far on dean’s end especially towards jack. nuanced emotional writing

Dean takes his meal and throws it away, plate and all. He's not hungry. How can he even begin to eat, knowing what he kept from Cas — what he kept from both of them?

They could have had something, and now all Dean has is this gaping, empty hole in his stomach, in his chest, and he has to learn to breathe and eat and move around it.

the law of equivalent exchange by awed_frog, 60.8k, canonverse. cas loving dean in all permutations of humanity, throughout time.

“And what’s the point of it?”

“Of love? There isn’t one. Loving is its own purpose.”

NEWER FIC

“newer” just means “i discovered it in 2020/2021 after coming back to spn fandom” so it very well could have been published before 2015 but really who’s checking. not me that’s for sure.

💖 so says the sword by komodobits, 85k, s4 au. cas guards the michael sword in the beautiful room. this is easily the MOST obvious rec on this entire list but it was the first fic i read when i got back into spn this year and jesus christ it set the bar sky fucking high. the way they create a coherent mythology out of the mess that is spn canon is incredible.

The briefing was simple: ‘Stand guard over the Michael Sword until the battle is ready to commence. Await further instructions.’

Castiel doesn’t mind working security duty; he was briefed shortly after the initial salvation of the Sword from the pit, and again before taking up his position. He knows what to do. However, it’s easy to forget that the green room isn’t real. Time moves differently there, the space ever-changing to make a prison of mountains, cathedrals, salt flats, orchards, and whatever Castiel was led to believe about Heaven’s greatest weapon—Dean Winchester is something entirely unexpected.

assimilation by komodobits, 5.6k, coda to 12x01. mary meets dean and cas and they go to find sam. such good character studies of all three of them. the best mary pov fic i’ve read

Mary always thought you were supposed to be able to tell. That you could just look at someone and know they were – you know. One of that sort. It’s not supposed to happen to her son.

cuckoo and nest by komodobits, 10k, ambiguously canonverse. dean and cas navigate relationship anxiety. cute, in character, and their relationship is realistic and the conflict well-written and emotionally nuanced and really really really good.

For a long time, Castiel thought that every earthly possession other than the immediately necessary was excess to requirement. But Dean – Dean who named his car, who keeps a photograph of his mother in his wallet, some thirty-plus years after her death, who still has the crumpled ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign with a sleeping pelican emblazoned on it from the Microtel outside of Roanoke where he first kissed Castiel, clumsy and unsure, under the unsteady fluorescence of an exhausted bathroom bulb – is sentimental.

It puzzles Castiel, where Dean draws the line between what is meaningful and what it is worthless.

💖 one white lie by komodobits, 11k, au. cas panics when trying to ask dean out and has to fake being a jehovah’s witness. it’s adorable and hilarious and it’s been ages since i actually got butterflies at a kiss in a fic but this did it. it did it. it felt like someone swaddled my soul in a cashmere blanket and kissed me on the forehead

Castiel takes a deep breath and rings the doorbell. He doesn’t need to run through what he’s going to say – he’s already planned and edited and rehearsed it a thousand times. He is going to ask Dean Winchester out to dinner. If it’s not too forward, he’ll say, perfectly charming. You see, I’ve seen you around the neighbourhood and you always seem so earnest and I’d really like to get to know you bette— The door swings open, and Castiel panics.

He intends to excuse himself. He means to apologise and come back some other time. However, in a moment of blind fear, what comes out of his mouth instead are the words, “Could you spare a moment for Jesus Christ?”

a crash course in someone else’s history by annie d (scaramouche), 11.5k, set during s6. cas comes to as his s4 self without any memories of the past two years and has to figure out what the fuck is going on. it’s kind of like so says the sword. you’ll know it when you get to it.

Castiel is captured inside a trapping circle of holy oil set by Dean and Sam Winchester. The brothers call him "Cas", claiming that he has amnesia and that he is obligated to help them take down Crowley to atone for his betrayal of them. It's the strangest story Castiel's ever heard, and one he doesn't have time for because he's only just raised Dean from Hell and has work to get back to.

💖 cas and dean’s adventures in gardening by ahurston, 19k, post-canon au. a series featuring dean and cas living in the bunker, human. cas is very into plants. i read this yesterday actually and it made me smile SO much it’s just so lovely and sweet. i’m also a sucker for any fic where cas has a garden. he deserves a fucking garden okay

In this post-God world, everything is different. A little quieter, a little softer. Cas grows a garden, Dean cooks, and they take care of each other.

tall grass by aeli_kindara, 57k, post-s12. dean and cas live in the bunker on their own, and cas grows a garden. i did say i love fics where cas has a garden. plus domesticity, plus some good case fic, PLUS dean and cas’ relationship is so gentle and good

“I think we should have a garden,” Cas says.

Dean looks up from his beer. He hasn’t had that much to drink, but Cas still has a vague look of unreality about him, a splash of living color that doesn’t fit in the bunker’s echoing stillness. Dean didn’t hear him coming. A lot of the time, Cas is so unobtrusive it feels like Dean has the bunker to himself, with Sam away.

Dean shakes his head to clear it. “A — garden?” he repeats.

in a week by renrub, 2.3k, post 15x18. cas is in the empty. dean saves him. this is genuinely the best “dean pulls cas out of the empty” fic i’ve read so far like conceptually this entire thing just fucks. when cas is cycling through the barn scene. god. SO well written

Castiel is outside a barn covered in sigils. He frowns. This isn’t right. This has never been something he repented for.

i won’t even wish for snow by annie d (scaramouche), 5.6k, college au. cas goes to the winchesters’ for christmas. honestly scaramouche fics belong in the classics section bc she’s like an og deancas writer but whatever. mistletoe! banter! good in-character au! this fic’s got it all

It’s the third year that Castiel’s spending Christmas with his best friend’s family, and he expects it to be much like the previous two. Then mistletoe happens.

convenient husbands by annie d (scaramouche), 39k, canonverse au. cas is a phoenix, dean is a hunter. they get married and have a sick psychic bond. unexpectedly fluffy considering how the fic starts and i love the banter so much and dean/cas’ relationship gets fleshed out and organically developed it’s very cute

"It's only temporary, right?" Dean says. "Just until you're healed up, and then we'll never have to see each other again. So what do you say, Castiel, do you want to marry me or not?"

cinderwings by bendingsignpost, 181k, cinderella au. cas goes to a masquerade ball to save his people from an eternity trapped in a void. he meets prince dean. i can’t tell u how much this fic drew me in - thru good worldbuilding, but mostly thru cas’ social awkwardness. like it works PERFECTLY to his advantage in this fic and reading how expertly he manipulates social situations w/o any fucking idea what he’s doing is both hilarious and inspiring

Under the cover of a masquerade ball, Castiel has five nights to recover the key to his people's freedom. The world has changed greatly in the six centuries since their banishment into the void, but the task isn't impossible. Unfortunately for Castiel, this is going to involve talking to people - especially the Knight Prince who has taken an interest in Castiel and his "costume" wings.

as the crow flies by bendingsignpost, 3.4k, au. dean and cas go on a roadtrip. cas has wings! it’s so dreamlike and meandering and the slowburn is so good. honestly it reminds me of stevebucky/stevesam post tws era roadtrip fics if ur hip LMAO

Cross country road trips with Cas are the best.

long-term relationship by bendingsignpost, 2.7k, au. dean and cas have a Serious Conversation about their relationship.

Castiel says, budging over to make room for Dean on the couch, “I thought we should have a serious talk about our relationship.”

Reflexively, Dean laughs.

Castiel does not.

“Uh, Cas... you know we’re not dating, right?”

all this and heaven too by ftmsteverogers, 7k, ambiguously canonverse. dean is trans. dean and cas are fucking and lowkey hiding it from sam. perfect character study PERFECT trans dean fic it’s so fucking well-written

“Hey,” Dean said. “I’m not ashamed of you, okay?”

Cas raised skeptical eyes to meet his.

“I mean it,” Dean insisted.

“I understand you mean it,” Cas said. “But I don’t think it’s any better if you’re only ashamed of yourself.”

💖 the love story of the runner up by margo_kim, 4.7k, ambiguously canonverse. cas tries dating other men. bear with me here. this is an outside pov fic from an oc named miguel who is WONDERFULLY characterized and very endearing like i find outsider/oc pov to be on Thin Fucking Ice bc it always ends up as fandom/author self-insert but miguel is his OWN MAN. he gets his own lil arc and everything. dean and cas are concentrated perfectly crystallized versions of themselves and the little glimpses we get of them are amazing. ALSO i wrote like 9k of an spn vent fic (basically the same premise but w an oc named marcus) back in like. freshman yr of hs. so when i first opened this fic i was like what the fuck someone’s been in my google docs. very weird experience 10/10 regardless

“So you saw a white man in a trench coat pop out in an alley,” Paul says, “and you thought, what, ‘I want to see where this is going’?”

“If you get hung up on details like that,” Miguel says, “it will take a very long time to get through this story.”

For a very weird era in his life, Miguel dates an angel who is in love with another man.

sunshine by northernsparrow, 8k, set during s13. dean and cas have a long conversation about their Profound Bond. the description left me off-balance (it really. really truly says “dean is straight in this fic” like okay bro WEIRD hill to die on) but it pulled through w the relationship study and reassurance and snuggles. a sweet fic

One-shot with a single conversation between Dean and Castiel, set in a late-S13-ish world. Gabriel, Cas, Sam & Dean are all living in the bunker together, Gabe's been cracking certain jokes, Sam's found a certain book, Cas is injured and isn’t healing... and it's all making Dean wonder if his angel friend might have some sort of a "bond" with... somebody? Whatever that means.

Maybe it's time for a talk.

💖 still life by catchclaw, 16.5k, post-s8. cas, newly human, goes to live on his own for a while. he and dean maintain a relationship thru the phone. this is LITERALLY the only first person fic i fucking respect okay like i was skeptical! i really was! but the pov is PERFECT and also my man kevin tran is in this fic and i love him and miss him very much. oh and cas going off to explore humanity on his own..............perfect arc. very much in character we love that for him

Dean'd always thought that falling in love was a capital letter kind of thing, an Important Event you carved into the calendar of your life and never, ever forgot. But with he and Cas, it wasn't that simple.

it’s mostly cowardice, and bad timing by ferritin4, 1.6k, pre-canon. actually this one is just a dean study it’s not deancas but i spent an entire night looking for it and i need someone else to read it too. dean is smart!!! SAY THAT

Dean gets his GED.

a list of reasons the bunker shouldn’t get a sofa by lizbobjones, 5.6k, set during s12. sam and dean and mary and cas haul a sofa back to the bunker. cute domesticity and fluff

Let me count the ways that this is a terrible idea.

no kingdom to come by domesticadventures, 16.8k, canonverse. dean and cas deal with being stuck in quarantine in different ways. this is the one and only quarantine fic i’ve read and it’s really good lmao. dean and cas’ relationship is so organic and tentative in this one

“We should fuck,” Dean says.

Cas looks up from where he sits on his bed, hair still damp from the shower, frowning as he places a finger on the page of his book to mark where he left off.

There are a million things Cas could say here; Dean has rehearsed them. After lunch, his restlessness had given way to a vague panic, a dread that matched his every step and crept along with him from room to room. Eventually, he had returned to his bedroom and spent the rest of the afternoon pacing back and forth, playing out all the possible scenarios. When Cas asks him Why? or Are you being serious? or when he sighs and says, in that way he has, Dean, he knows exactly what he’s going to do. He’s going to shrug casually, like he isn’t invested in the answer, like he isn’t desperate for an outlet, and say, Why not? He’s going to raise an eyebrow and say, What, are you not interested? He’s going to crowd into Cas’ personal space, he’s going to shove himself right up in there and whisper Cas against his ear.

Instead, Cas says, carefully, “Okay.”

till the juice runs by deathbanjo, 8.4k, canonverse. it’s like dean’s being cursed to have bad hookups with men. SUCH a funny fic and the deancas tension is so simple and sweet and GOOD. plus cas is so enjoyably characterized here he’s so human and worn in and experienced in his own unique way. perfect use of rowena too

Apparently whoever drew up the venn diagram of Dean’s sex life decided the circle labelled ‘good sex’ and the one labelled ‘sex with men’ should be kept far apart.

turn of the year by kototyph, 3.9k, canonverse au. sam and dean get stuck out in the middle of nowhere on the winter solstice. what i wouldn’t give for a full 80k of this verse actually. also i went on a kototyph binge after reading shut up put your money where your mouth is and they have a SOLID spn repertoire

Fifteen minutes later, Dean gets back in the car with empty hands and ice in his fucking eyebrows. “Get the map out,” he says through chattering teeth, sticking numb fingers under his arms.

Sam holds up the battered 1995 Rand MacNally they keep in the side pocket, turned to a page of uninterrupted green. “We’re going to die,” he announces.

💖 bullets in the gun by kototyph, 4.9k, canonverse au. cas is a cop (i know. still) who gets kidnapped by dean in an unfortunate turn of events. GOD this fic is SO FUNNY. cas’ canny and strategic escape attempts render him a very active VERY funny pov character plus the hate attraction to dean is PERFECTLY WRITTEN VERY BELIEVABLE. dean’s kindness also shines thru even as he literally holds cas hostage like!!!! PERFECT characterization. both of them are so LIKABLE here. if you read anything on this list read this

“Sorry, sweetheart, but I’m going to need to borrow your car.”

as you will by kototyph, 1.8k, victorian au. cas endures a proposal mishap. it’s cute it’s funny it’s sweet!

"No?" Castiel echoes, dumbly.

and if i was looking too? by kototyph, 2.6k, au. cas is undercover where dean works. this fic is just so cute like. bird angels.................

There are some things Castiel hasn't told Dean, and there are some things he doesn't need to.

the most important thing by northernsparrow, 94.5k, s10 au. amnesiac cas raising claire until he comes across someone familiar. claire is so well characterized here i really loved her arc thruout this fic. she just wants her dad back and u can’t even blame her the author rlly does an amazing job creating realistic and heartbreaking motivations for her. oh and dean and cas (esp cas characterization!) are sweet in this but honestly the highlight IS claire for me

there’s only one sure thing that i know by blinkiesays, 20.3k, post-s5. dean goes to help cas out in ohio and they end up building a home together. i love the writing it’s rlly funny and sweet.

Dean doesn't even get halfway through explaining before Bobby starts laughing. When he lets himself think about it for more than five seconds, Dean can almost see Bobby's point: he's faced down demons, witches, vampires, werewolves, ghosts, angels, and Satan himself and now he's been defeated by the God damn Midwest.

💖 to an angel, love and worship are the same thing by geminisage, 10.3k, post s15 fix it. dean grieves cas - and then cas gets brought back back from the empty. i didn’t have this in my bookmarks so i MISSED it the first time around on this list but this was another one of the fics i came back to spn fandom to. it’s so fucking unique?? it actually reads like spn like i think fic tends to soften dean/cas up and makes them more emotional + emotionally intelligent than is ever shown in the show. here the dialogue/characterization adheres RIGOROUSLY to their communication in canon in that dean’s not overtly emotional, and cas is very reserved. they have to negotiate their relationship exactly like they would in the show. it’s all clipped conversation and anger and hurt and (warning btw) LOTS of internalized homophobia on dean’s end but it’s SO worth it. dean navigating his [GESTURES VAGUELY] everything is compellingly written, emotionally true, and PERFECTLY characterized. cas characterization also amazing like u rlly feel the quiet devoted bittersweet love. ok this was long clearly it’s a good fic go read it now

Just as Dean knew they would, the weeks do stretch into months, and then into a year. Grief never gets easier, Dean knows from experience, but you do get better at it. After all, you can get used to anything.

the violin house by teh_helenables, 8.5k, post-s5. dean and cas build a home after stull. so slow and lovely and sweet and gentle. i need to put this here so that i don’t forget it tbh. it’s very much dean as a war wife cas as the husband away on the front

The Apple Pie Life is a slow process, but Dean and Cas are getting there—until Cas is called for battle and Dean is forced to wait.

💖 muscle memory by komodobits, 18.9k, au. amnesiac cas wakes up three years in the future with dean in his kitchen. komodobits DOES NOT FUCKING MISS!!! i CRIED at the end of this i had NO INTENTION OF CRYING the rest of the fic isn’t even SAD i just had to sit there at the end of it w tears dribbling down my face. INSANE work of art

Dear Castiel,

Hello – it’s Castiel. This must all seem very confusing, and I’m sorry for that. Dean says to tell you that this isn’t some kind of ‘time-travel stunt’, although I’m sure that won’t be your first thought. I know it wasn’t mine. I’ve told Dean to leave now, as this is my notebook and I want everything in it to come from me – or rather, from you. I know you think it's the fifteenth of January, 2010, but it isn't. At the time of my writing this, the date is the fourth of October, 2013. Dean Winchester is your boyfriend of a year and a half, and you no longer work at the library, and in early 2010 you were hit by a car and hospitalised. I’m sorry.

a.k.a the 50 First Dates Dean/Cas AU where Castiel wakes up on a day just like any other, except that three years have passed without his knowing, and Dean Winchester is in the kitchen wanting to marry him.

don’t forget the experience points by annie d (scaramouche), 10.8k, au. cas is sam’s work friend, and he and dean get to know each other. genuinely an adorable fic. i adore cas’ characterization in this it’s snarky AND awkward AND confident in a way that i absolutely believe he would be if he had 30 yrs of human life under his belt

It's because Dean was an awesome brother than he took such an interest in Sam's new friend. No, really. What happened afterwards was mostly an accident.

actus fidei by manic_intent, 5.6k, canonverse au. dean’s a priest, cas is still his angel. i was HOOKED from the description alone like That’s Everything I Love in One Sentence. Cool!!!!!!!!!!!!

On the very first time that Castiel manifests in front of Father Dean Winchester, he gets as far as "Rejoice, for you are blessed-" before Dean shoots him with a salt-loaded shotgun.

not with a bang but a yelp by strange_estrangement, 1.4k, canonverse. team free will leave yelp reviews. this isn’t d/c actually it’s just a crack-ish fic but the formatting is cool and the references are SO funny and so well done

What happens when you visit dozens and dozens of motels every year? You leave Yelp reviews.

the courtship of combat by bendingsignpost, 18.2k, medieval a/b/o au. cas is politically coerced into fighting in a courtship melee for prince dean's hand, and he teams up with two unexpected allies to do it. I KNOW HOW THE ABO THING SOUNDS but i swear it's done well - it's by bendingsignpost so ofc he puts his own spin on the premise. im absurdly into it. PLUS jack is in it!!!!!!! it's technically an unfinished series but the first part is so good just on its own

When pressed upon to mate for a political alliance, Commander Castiel dares to refuse his king. As “I do not wish to mate at all” is clearly the wrong thing to say, Castiel takes the other path and lies. “You must know my affections lie elsewhere, my king.”

King Michael studies Castiel’s face long and hard. Then, with a nod, he snaps his fingers, pointing to Castiel. “The Winchester omega.”

“Yes,” Castiel says with no real recollection of who that is.

The ruse of an unavailable omega works well enough, right up until that omega is no longer unavailable. Then, with what seems to be his entire nation cheering him on toward victory, Castiel must enter the melee to win his mate. Backed by allies, training, and his own natural talents, the only question is how well he can contrive to fail.

four letter word for intercourse by bendingsignpost, 194.7k, au. dean calls a sex hotline. OH BOY solid characterization excellent plot/premise like bendingsignpost is so good at turning absurd premises into realistic, believable fiction. also sex hotline fic is usually a BIG turn-off bc of the power dynamics/one-sidedness of a relationship based on sex work but. BUT. bendingsignpost does it well! it’s not weird at ALL i started reading and was immediately reassured abt its intentions and its plot direction

As a grease monkey turned college freshman, Dean's constantly three seconds away from being stressed out of his mind. It hardly helps that he's finally figuring out his sexuality in his thirties.

What might help with that stress is a little phone number (and a big credit card bill). If he can't figure out how to be bisexual in person, he can at least give it a go over the phone, right?

(It's probably a bad idea, but he really can't help himself.)

the tunnel of love by xylodemon, 21.4k, post-canon. case fic! dean and cas have to kiss on a loveboat to solve a case >:)

"We might," Cas starts slowly, pausing like he's choosing his words. "We might have to kiss."

Dean just stares at him.

when you have a future. by firebog, 17.6k, post-s8. dean and sam and cas learning to be human post-apocalypse. reminds me of robotmango’s writing! it’s kind of eccentric and very very sweet and funny.

Sam closes Hell. Castiel closes Heaven. The heroes save the day. There's no Heaven or Hell waiting to cause the next big disaster. There's no more end of the world. There's only a squirmy feeling in his chest that feels a lot like freedom. So, now what?

(Things I promise you in this fic: dog poetry, rabbits, and fluff)

six inch heels by alitneroon, 2.3k, canonverse. dean does drag! excellent fucking character study. prose is fantastic

Dean does drag on a whim, and ends up in way over his head.

sharing is caring by gateskeeper, 2.5k, canonverse. five times dean and cas shared something and one time they didn’t. look. sometimes u just need some saccharine tropey fluff. it’s VERY well written

Sam knows that Dean and Cas have shared a lot together, but ever since Cas became human permanently, it seems like they've been sharing a lot more.

Or: five times Dean and Cas shared something special and one time Dean refused to.

💖 empty spaces by schmerzerling, 60k, au. dean has to take care of his dying father, and takes up running to cope. that’s just the beginning. HEAVY trigger warnings for ED (specifically anorexia) and suicidal thoughts. there is a happy ending, but dean has to fight to make it there. god. okay. this is a dark fic. it’s also one of the most well-characterized fics i’ve ever read. dean’s spiral is excruciatingly accurate and written with the kind of wry compassion that comes from either extensive research or extensive experience. it’s also completely immersed in dean’s perspective - dean’s relationship w his dad, dean’s relationship w food scarcity, etc. it’s incredible. it’s kinda scary. it’s deeply sad. cas is explicitly autistic and it’s ALSO incredibly accurate and loving, and makes cas so true to his canon self. ugh. and i burst into TEARS at some of the accompanying art, which is so sparse and lonely and beautiful. 100/10 experience one of the best fics i’ve read this year

Dean is fine. The way he sees it, things are simple. He had a house and a family and food in his stomach, and now he doesn't. And yeah, that's a downer, but he's not going to let that stop him from being fine, because he's in control of the situation. He definitely doesn't need anyone to save him. And it's not like the weird guy with the nice butt from down the road is the knight-in-shining-armor type, anyway.

broken road by thegeminisage, 109.6k, 14x13 au. dean makes a wish and gets more than he bargained for. a lot of “john comes back” fics are kinda short on nuance, which this author has talked about a lot - and oh MAN does this fic deliver on nuance. john’s abuse is absolutely present, but his pov makes him a complex character instead of a flat caricature for dean to reject. and the way this fic resolves really makes it clear that the priority is dean’s emotional well-being over all else!!! this isn’t about dean taking the path fandom thinks he should take w his abuser (killing john, punching john in the face, etc), this is abt dean coming to terms w his abuse and finding his own emotionally satisfying way of resolving it. also dean and cas are in an established relationship and it’s very slow and sweet.

home is not a place by imogenbynight, 6.8k, post-s11. human cas struggles with belonging, and dean struggles with their relationship. this reads a lot like komodobits’ cuckoo and nest, but it’s its own sweet little thing. they watch movies!!! very cute

In which Dean is the oblivious one for a change.

love: a retrospective by xylodemon, 40.7k, post-s12. dean tries to deal w cas’ absence after s12 and reflects on their relationship thru the years. this was written before s13 aired, so - no spoilers - but jack plays a different role than he ends up playing in canon. it’s kinda fun seeing ppl’s theories pre-s13 tbh. makes me VERY glad that they took jack in the direction they did in show. anyway this is THEE definitive “they’ve been fucking all along” fic

Pretending Cas is just his friend has been the only thing keeping Dean's head on straight for years. He never realized how much doing that depended on him making himself scarce in the morning ─ not until Cas came back and moved into the bunker.

✨💖 if it all fell to pieces tomorrow by spocklee, 37k, post-s15 fix-it. cas gets broken out of the empty - and he immediately makes a break for it. new fave fix-it!!!! the writing is so understated and so straightforward - SO in character for cas tbh - that every single emotional beat feels like a PUNCH. and there are so many amazing character moments it made my chest seize the fuck up!!!!! perfect characterization perfect relationship moments perfect cas/jack parenting moments. the yearning over the phone is OFF THE CHARTS and spocklee makes the most of that tension!!!! PLUS old canon characters get to make fun appearances!!!!! i cannot recommend this shit enough

After the Empty, Cas has to spend some time alone. Orpheus tries to convince Eurydice over the phone that it’s okay to turn around now.

✨ before and after breakfast by spocklee, 10.5k, post-canon. dean and sam and cas tackle a monster of the week case with unexpected consequences. perfect pov perfect relationship moments SUCH GOOD TENSION. again this writing style just lets the tension dial up to 1000% every word is meaningful and it makes my chest hurt!!! spocklee SHOULD have blown up during the spn renaissance and i STAND by that

The monster of the week is a ghost who hates meat, alcohol, and feeling yourself. Guess who it is during the commercials.

CLASSICS

isn't it cool how every person has diff fics they consider "classics?" anyway these are required fucking reading. if u've been around these will prob be old news.

💖 asunder by rageprufrock, 23k, au. dean and cas go to sam's wedding. i reread this once a year like a religious ritual.

Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. (Matthew 19:6)

💖 the girlfriend experience by rageprufrock, 15k, set during s5. dean teaches cas how to be human. mostly the sex part. literally the gold fucking standard of s4-5 era deancas fic and for deancas fic in general, personally

While it's not like Dean hasn't had a couple of truly regrettable hit-and-runs in his sexual history, this is probably the saddest fucking thing that has ever happened to him.

okay, cupid. by orange_crushed, 4.5k, au. dean tries to sign up for an ok cupid profile and has a revelation. as soon as i put this entry down i realized this entire fic rec was an exercise in futility, because if i could i'd literally just rec everything orange_crushed/robotmango has ever written. still one of THEE best authors in this fandom. go read all her fics. i’ll put the highlights here

"The dating thing?" Dean frowns. "Online dating is for weirdos. Robots. Dudes hanging out in their basements."

"You hang out in your basement."

"I have an air hockey table down there,” Dean says, icily.

💖 pwp: pie without plot by orange_crushed and majorenglishesquire, 82k, post-s8. sam and dean and cas quit hunting for a little bit to open a bakery. this is my comfort fic. i love it so so much.

he is in the kitchen with flour on his hands and an apron and there is flour on his forehead and cas leans across the counter and wipes it off with his thumb and dean says "thank you" and cas says "you’re welcome" very seriously and later dean makes apple turnovers and he only ruins them a little and sam realizes it’s not a real hunt like four days into it and he lets dean stay undercover for like a week and a half or longer maybe way longer because he is such a good everything

💖 la cucina by orange_crushed, 4k, post-s8. dean gets into cooking for a newly human cas. it's so gentle and loving and kind and makes me tear up every time. YES food is a comfort item and expression of love for dean. no i don't want to talk about it

Dean turns around and Castiel is picking through the jars, turning them over carefully to read the labels, totally engrossed. Dean watches him.

"Is there," Dean says, "uh, anything in there you like?" Castiel looks up at him and then back at the apples, sitting in a basket on the counter in their golden skins, ripe and pretty. Castiel smiles up at Dean.

"I don’t know yet," he says.

today, your barista verse by orange_crushed, 13.6k, coffeeshop au. a series of short sweet lovely fics where cas is a barista and dean is a smitten customer. literally the only coffeeshop au i respect

"Is that-"

"My number," says Dean, because he's a fucking champion, he's cool, he's collected, he's Captain Smooth of the USS Smoothtania, that's right. He is definitely not leaning against the counter for moral support. Cas doesn't looked seduced or impressed, though. He does not look like a dude who just met Captain Smooth and wants to ride the loveboat. He looks puzzled.

fata morgana. by orange_crushed, 6.6k, post-s9. dean is the king of hell. bela and cas team up to find him. bela pov. yeah you fucking heard that right BELA POV. BELA AND CAS!!!!!!!!!! makes me lose my mind i love everyone in this stupid desolate fucking hell wasteland.

The endless asphalt and broken road, the empty land and piles of human garbage, the unwanted ends of life, the cracked toys and broken screens and burning cars and gravel. Dean Winchester is the king of hell.

"Oh," says Bela.

That changes certain things.

💖 gran fury. by orange_crushed, 5k, pacific rim au. sam and cas pair up in a last ditch mission to save the world. permanently damaged me at age 15 and i've never recovered. major fucking angst warning.

They sit in silence and Castiel passes him the bottle. There’s not much left to say. Sam takes a gulp and it burns going down, like the cheap shit it is. He holds the bottle up against the light. He can see the Fury through it, distorted like a funhouse mirror. She’s a tomb but Sam loves her. Loves everything that’s left.

"To the end of the world," he says.

"To the end of the world," says Castiel.

💖 shut up (put your money where your mouth is) by kototyph, 24k, au. dean and cas get drunk married in vegas. dean renovates cas' house. this fic is SO MUCH BETTER than i remembered/expected and the entire series is fucking adorable go read it RIGHT now

Dean's done some pretty stupid things, but getting drunk-hitched in Vegas to a colleague he barely knows might just take the cake. His surprise husband, Castiel, is a little weird but likable despite that, and Dean figures they’ll go back to Boston, get a quiet annulment, and go their separate ways. Six weeks later, he’s still married to one of the strangest, most genuine and definitely most dangerously lov-- likable guys he's ever known. Dean doesn't know why or really even how it’s happening, but it’s getting harder and harder to remember that he has divorce papers to file.

not part of the plan by annie d (scaramouche), 338k, arranged marriage au. cas is slated to marry a noble from the winchester house. things spiral out of control. if you’re looking for an extensive well-developed political au, this is fucking it. i love reading about political machinations so this was FASCINATING to me.

Castiel's spent most of his adult life keeping his head down and staying out of trouble. This is a deliberate choice on his part, because as a cousin of the King, he'd rather stay unimportant and forgotten. This changes abruptly when King Michael decides that he has a better use for Castiel: he is to be wed to a noble member of the neighboring Republic, as part of an agreement between their two nations.

Castiel knows he has to obey, but that doesn't mean he won't rebel in what small ways he can. Unexpectedly, his actions end up having far-reaching consequences.

💖 all things shining by askance and standbyme, 142k, au. sam and dean and cas go on a hunt that's not really a hunt, and against all odds good things happen. it's beautifully written and has scenes that literally make my heart leap out of my chest with joy and awe it's just WONDERFUL it's a wonderful fic. incredible mythology too omg i found that the authors actually created the myth the entire story is based on - like they don’t pull a random one from history, they made one up THEMSELVES. they even self-published it on amazon if ur curious

Something in the world is waking up.

It isn’t long before it’s brought to the attention of the Winchesters and Castiel: miracles are spreading across the country, the paranormal seems to be shrinking back on itself—and it all has something to do with the missing prayer book of a traveling preacher who died over a century ago.

Dean is convinced it’s all the lead-up to another Apocalypse; Sam and Castiel aren’t so sure. Regardless, it sends them out on a less-than-typical road-trip, following the Mississippi and remnants of a very old story that seems increasingly to call to them. And along the way the trio learn much more about themselves—and the consequences and origins of love—than they’d ever have anticipated.

💖 broadway musical by griftings, 12.4k, crack. romcom where cas is supposed to play matchmaker to dean and jo and well. you know. it actually made me cackle out loud when i read it again so you know it's still good. absolutely one of the funniest fics i’ve read

This is the day that marked the Holy and Blessed Union of Dean Winchester and Jo Harvelle.

The merging of prominent bloodlines is always a grand occurrence, but breeding pedigree hunter families like Winchester and Harvelle is something to be rejoiced. It is also something to be meticulously planned, which thankfully the Host is very good at.

Or, the romantic comedy where Dean Winchester and Jo Harvelle are destined to get married, Castiel is given the task of playing matchmaker and fails terribly, the entire Heavenly Host becomes a sitcom audience, God warns against male pregnancy, and Jimmy Novak is incredibly unimpressed with angels in general.

the five people you meet in heaven by chevrolangels, 22k, ambiguously canonverse. dean dies and goes to heaven and meets five people from his life. NOT a post-finale fic but still horrifically sad. i remember sobbing hysterically when i first read this so

Heaven is white.

Well. Isn’t that fucking stereotypical.

Dean isn’t really sure how he got here. Or even why he’s here. And hell, for all the times the Winchesters have died, he thinks he ought to know the drill by now. But what he doesn’t know is when most folks go, they find something different.

There’s a system God put in place. That when you’re gone (for good), there are a couple things you gotta do first. There are five people waiting for you.

They are the five people you meet in heaven.

any port in a storm by microcomets, 53k, post-s8. dean and cas go on a haunted cruise for a case. you know what happens next. also the art is by anobviousaside and it's gorgeous

The angels have fallen, leaving Castiel graceless and Dean with, well, more of other people’s problems. When a string of couples goes missing on the east coast, Dean and Cas decide to investigate—and find themselves trapped and hunted on a couples’ counseling cruise. Although battling monsters at sea is dangerous enough, sorting through emotional baggage proves to be far more deadly. (And, in which Cas embarks to find his missing grace and Dean is put out. Not necessarily in that order.)

a turn of the earth by microcomets, 95k, pre-canon au. cas is on the run from the empty and crash lands in dean's life. at one point he punches john in the face. a fucking beautifully written character study of pre-canon dean, honestly.

Dean’s your typical half-orphaned, monster-killing 22-year-old until a trenchcoated stranger crashes into his back windshield one September night, claiming he’s an angel that knows him from the future and that he’s on the run.

Frigging fantastic.

(Or, in which Castiel gets stuck in Dean’s timeline preseries and Dean kind of hates it—until he doesn’t.)

unfinished duet by microcomets, 5.8k, canonverse. sam observes dean and cas throughout the years. i remember this breaking my heart back in 2013!

Sam watches Dean and Cas over the years and notices a few things. (Or, Dean and Cas unscripted.)

💖 ergative/absolutive by glassedplanets, 8k, college au. dean and cas are best friends who meet in an astronomy class. i'm never not thinking about this fic it's so sweet and the friends to lovers is so soft and believable

He really shouldn’t be thinking thoughts like this about his best friend who literally just broke up with his girlfriend, but he knows he’ll blame it on sleepiness in the morning. He always does.

a certain light by flightagain, 24k, au. cas works at the gas n sip. dean is a customer. this author’s writing style is so lonely and heavy but it’s very lovely

Castiel works at the Gas-n-Sip. There are half-price nachos and flickering lights, there are office-workers and werewolves stopping by for snacks. Dean is a frequent customer, and his office might be haunted.

the one thing you can’t lose by majorenglishesquire, 5k, ambiguously canonverse. dean can pull cas around and it’s adorable. character study-ish. very sweet.

You know what I like a lot? The thought that Dean can just tug Cas anywhere at any time and Cas, who can lift tons without effort, who can demolish things with the light of his grace, who has battled and gone to war, has defended and broken, will just let Dean do it.

brother lover by twentysomething, 4k, set during s4/s5. dean’s jealous of sam and cas’ budding relationship. this fic is so tropey but it does it well and it’s funny as fuck

However- and it doesn't happen a lot- they have to invoke 'I saw her first.’

his fucking kids by 8sword, 3k, canonverse au. dean and cas raise claire and emma together. yes, claire novak. yes, emma of 7x13 spice girls fame. this was the first kidfic i read for spn i think. obvs written before jack or claire actually came back into the picture but it was the TEMPLATE of kidfic for me for ages

Jesus, the school should just have a parking spot labeled, “Reserved for the Novak-Winchesters,” because Dean’s getting sick of having to cruise around the parking lot looking for a spot every time he gets a call from the principal about Emma.

💖 what has eight tentacles and isn’t allowed to eat pie? by annie d (scaramouche), 16k, post s8. dean gets turned into an octopus. another fic that was SO MUCH BETTER than i remembered i fucking love when that happens. it isn’t even about dean being an OCTOPUS like NO. NOT EVEN. it’s ACTUALLY about the bunker and building a home and a community and a family and about PHYSICAL COMFORT and you can actually feel the world expanding at the end of this fic like a gusty sigh of relief it’s SO WONDERFUL. kevin is in this fic. ellie is too and i had to look her up but THIS is her!!!! danay garcia u were too hot to stay on this show but i love you and miss u

Dean watched an anime porn about this once, but real life turns out to be way less interesting.

Or, the one where Dean gets turned into an octopus.

💖 a beginner’s guide to communing with the dead by suspiciousflashlight, 77k, canonverse au. dean is a cop who summons a powerful entity to help him solve a cold case. oh my god i can’t believe i didn’t put this on here i love this one so much. the writing bowls me over it’s so confident in its worldbuilding like you’re IMMEDIATELY plunged into dean’s pov (FLAWLESSLY executed throughout the fic btw) and you just learn about the world as you go!! and it’s such a fascinating world!!! i love the magic i love the typical bureaucratic red tape procedures i love normalizing the supernatural. i ESPECIALLY love monsters as normal people in a society. at one point there’s this exchange

“Monsters,” says Cas finally. “Beyond the Wall there are monsters.” “You mean, like, vampires and djinn and stuff?” Cas shakes his head. “Those aren’t monsters, those are just people.”

those lines have stayed with me for years. i think about them every time i rewatch an episode of spn.

Maybe it's the little girl whose disappearance turned into a murder, and whose murder turned into a cold case, and who has now apparently decided to move in with him. Maybe it's the unacceptable hole left in his life when his dumb best friend and partner in (the prevention of) crime decided to go and get himself killed. Maybe it's his brother, whose high-profile career and fantastic girlfriend and first-child-on-the-way are steadily leaving Dean in the dust. Pick one. Pick all of them. The why doesn't matter so much as the what, and the what is this: Dean is pretty sure he's going completely, certifiably insane. Sure, he hasn't started wearing all his clothes inside out, and he still showers on a regular basis (anyways, that's not crazy, just a little eccentric); but there's no getting around the fact that he just threw away his life, his career, and his reputation by dragging out his mom's old necromancy book and summoning a Class A Forbidden Entity to his attic. A cranky one, too. With horrendous bed-head.

dean’s list by almaasi, 3k, canonverse. dean makes a list. short and sweet. i read this so much in 2015 that it literally got engraved into my brain line by line and rereading it caused synapses to fire that havent felt anything in years

Dean writes out a list of men he would go gay for. Sam has a suggestion to make.

💖 the path of fireflies by museaway, 63.7k, post-s8. dean and cas open a charming bed and breakfast in vermont. no, literally. another CLASSIC. i think about the food in this fic all the time...........maple bacon baked french toast......the cinnamon rolls.....it literally sounds so good

After his humanity is restored, Dean wakes up in bed with Castiel, a wedding ring, and no memory of the past twelve years.

long nights in cold months by pyrebi, 2.3k, au. dean’s an insomniac and cas works at walmart. i forgot i had this fic ALSO basically memorized. holy shit. pineapple in the fruit aisle.....................anyway it’s short and sweet and the “plot” resolves in such a satisfying way

When you're an insomniac, you get used to the "what the hell are you doing up, man?" look. Dean just hopes the guy who's stocking the shelves will stop giving it to him long enough to help him find some damn pineapple.

incredibly single & ready to mingle by imogenbynight, 3.6k, au. dean and cas meet on facebook. short cute au!!!!!!

Sam uses Facebook like the social media junkie he is. He's befriended literally every person he's ever had a conversation with since he got an account, which means that approximately—Dean checks—eight hours ago, he shared this horrible photo with something in the vicinity of nine hundred people. The caption below the picture reads “incredibly single & ready to mingle ;)” and roughly half of them have liked it.

Dean has never been so embarrassed in his life.

💖 unknown quantities by xylodemon, 8.5k, post-s8. after a post-case tryst, dean has to figure out his and cas’ relationship. human cas fics hold a special place in my heart. funny AND good dean pov AND a misunderstanding that i actually think works!!!!!

No one ever tells Dean anything.

(or: Dean Winchester and the not-relationship crisis of 2014)

#spn fic #spn #dean x cas #this is horrifically long actually.

28 notes · View notes

dothwrites · 5 years

Text

15.08 coda--made in the heart

There is no such thing as a ‘broken family’. Family is family, and is not determined by marriage certificates, divorce records, or adoption papers. Families are made in the heart. The only time family becomes null is when those ties in the heart are cut. If you cut those ties, those people are not your family. If you make those ties, those people are your family. And if you hate those ties, those people will still be your family because whatever you hate will always be with you.--C. Joybell C.

---

Castiel stares at the flickering, golden light of the portal. It beckons him forward the same time as the bunker beckons him to stay.

If you want to stay that badly, then stay.

Every time he thinks that he’s made headway, every time some of the ice cracks around his heart--Dean seems to sense that, comes in swinging with his words like weapons, honed to the perfect edge to cut him to ribbons. At this point, every interaction with Dean, even the neutral ones, have the potential to leave him bleeding.

“We need to hurry,” he says, never taking his eyes off the rip. “We only have twelve hours.”

Dean makes an awkward stutter-step towards the rift, towards him, before he stops. “We need to wait for Sam and Eileen. They can help us or at the very least, keep the rift open from the other side.”

Castiel takes another step closer to the rift. This close, he can almost smell it, the dank, rotten woods scent of Purgatory. That scent lingered in his nostrils long after he found himself back in the real world. That scent was ingrained into his skin for months after he was walking the earth once more. Even now, it beckons to him with a sick, twisted claw.

Through that rift is the flower which can help them bind Chuck. Through that rift lies the means of getting justice for his boy. Castiel won’t let anything stop him-not Eileen, not Sam, and certainly not Dean Winchester.

“Then stay and wait. I’m going.”

Castiel turns his back on Dean and steps towards the rift. Behind him, he can hear Dean shouting at him--Cas, you stupid son of a bitch, just wait for a goddamned minute, wait until Sam gets back, you don’t know what the fuck you’re doing, Cas WAIT--

Castiel steps through the portal. Warmth, the bunker, Dean’s voice--They all disappear. The only thing left is the grey, bleached bone hue of Purgatory and the overwhelming sense of hostility pressing against him from all sides.

Castiel has no idea what a Leviathan blossom looks like. He has no idea where to find one. He has no idea what awaits him, only that it’s likely unpleasant.

Castiel picks a direction and starts walking.

---

After Cas leaves, Dean is frozen. All he can do is stare at the rift, at the place where Cas disappeared.

He should know by now, that Cas always walks away. Between the two of them, Cas is always the first to leave.

He needs to wait for Sam. Twelve hours is nothing, compared to the vast plains of Purgatory. Dean knows--he was there for a year and he knows he came nowhere close to finding the edges of Purgatory. He needs Sam to hold the rift open, on the wild off-chance that they haven’t managed to find a single flower in that span of time.

He needs to wait for Sam.

Cas’ face, when he turned back to the rift--Like he’d already said goodbye, except Dean never heard the words, never felt that kind of closure--he’s never had that kind of closure with Cas, never been able to shove all of his feelings into a neat little box, close the lid, and walk away. Something’s always been unsaid between them.

Cas’ hand, shaking over his, close enough that he could feel the regular, human warmth of his skin, but not touching. Cas’ face as he turned away, resentful, hurt, and fearful, like he was worried what Dean would do to him. The way that Cas hasn’t been able to be in a room with him for longer than five minutes.

He needs to wait for Sam.

He needs--

“God damn it,” Dean snarls, already running towards his room to get his weapons.

---

An angel in Purgatory doesn’t go unnoticed for long.

Not surprisingly, it’s the Leviathans who find him first.

Castiel feels them before he sees them--ancient, implacable.

Hungry.

Just two, but Leviathans were a formidable opponent when he still had all his grace. Diminished as he is--Castiel hefts his angel blade and reaches for the little bit of grace still flickering dimly inside him.

The Leviathans appear in a meteor of black goo, their mouths already split into identical grins. “Look who we found,” the first one, a non-descript man, says.

“Castiel,” the second Leviathan, a woman, croons. “We thought we’d seen the last of you.” Her eyes flick up and down his body. “You’re looking good enough to eat.”

Castiel doesn’t bother trying to talk his way out. The Leviathans might know the him of years past, but they still know him. They already know his fear; no doubt they can smell it on the air. There’s nothing he can hide from them.

All that remains is to fight.

It’s an uneven battle from the beginning--one seraphim against two Leviathan was always doomed to failure. But Castiel tries as hard as he can, the memory of Jack’s last scream echoing in his mind fueling his increasingly desperate motions.

It ends. Maybe not as quickly as the Leviathans were expecting, but with the same outcome.

Castiel lays on the ground, pinned, the female’s hand around his throat. “We’ve been waiting so long for you to come back,” she murmurs, throwing her head back. Her face splits, revealing rows and rows of teeth, and this is how it ends, him failing in Purgatory, alone with some of his greatest fears--

Black blood spatters over Castiel’s face as the top half of the woman’s head disappears. He’s frozen in shock, but only for a second, before he’s rolling. Blade in hand, he moves on the male Leviathan. His blade flashes through the air, sending his head rolling.

Castiel twists, looking for--He doesn’t know what he’s looking for (Dean, his heart sings, a joyful chorus, Dean, he’s always looking for Dean), but he certainly doesn’t expect what he finds.

“Well, Feathers, I never thought that I’d be seeing you here again,” Benny drawls, blade propped on his shoulder.

---

Purgatory welcomes Dean back like he never left.

It’s intoxicating, the whiff of death and rot that he gets the second he steps through the portal. Within the first moments of being there, Dean feels something crack open in his chest--layers of bullshit, of guilt, human trappings being shed like regrets.

In his darkest of hearts, Dean can admit that he missed the clarity that came from Purgatory.

He finds it now, the obsidian blade heavy on his shoulder as he walks through the undergrowth. He can hear the rustlings of creatures, but none dare to accost him--perhaps his legend remains after all this time.

He doesn’t have the first fucking clue of what a Leviathan blossom is. As far as he can tell, nothing really grows in Purgatory. Everything is in a mild state of decay. He can’t find a bit of ground that isn’t covered by some layer of slimy, molding leaves. He’s just beginning to think that this whole thing was a waste of time--Michael’s getting his revenge after years of neglect--when he hears the sounds of a fight.

Dean’s heart immediately stutters in his chest--Cas, he thinks, fear and horror in his chest, Cas--And he’s running before he knows what he’s doing, before he has a chance to even think about a plan.

It was always easier in Purgatory, to shed all the bullshit trappings. Purgatory pares everything down to the essentials and right now, all that matters is Cas, and the fact that Cas might be in trouble--

His heart leaps into his throat when he sees Cas on the ground, Leviathan’s mouth poised to take a chomp--And then...And then...

Dean carries the weight of Benny around his neck like he carries the weight of all his fallen comrades, his family, those that he wasn’t able to save. Benny, however, stays closer to his heart, pulls him down a little farther. To see him here--Whole, laughing, going so far as to reach out and prod at Cas’ shoulder--Dean bursts out of the undergrowth and into the meadow before he can stop himself. Benny and Cas whirl around, blades at the ready at the sound. When he sees who it is, Benny lowers his blade.

Cas doesn’t.

“Hey brother,” Benny greets him, arms already opening in a hug. And for everything surrounding them, Dean hugs back, awash in the simple physical sensation of comfort, if only for a moment.

Benny pulls back, looks between him and Cas, and Dean can already see his mind working, the wheels turning, the addition happening. It’s a complicated equation that has to put Dean+Castiel together in such a way as to not end up with the final product of Dean and Castiel.

“You hunting more big-mouths?” is all Benny asks.

Dean’s eyes flick automatically to Cas, a reflex ingrained through years. He looks to Cas, knowing that Cas will be looking back, because Cas is always looking back--Cas stares straight ahead at the wilderness of Purgatory, like he could force it to give up its secrets with the sheer force of his will.

“We’re looking for a flower,” Dean says, ripping his eyes away from Cas and bringing them back to Benny. “We need it to...Well, it’s a long damn story, but we need a Leviathan blossom.”

Benny’s eyebrows quirk upward. “And what do you need one of those for?”

Dean almost laughs. He yearns for the simplicity of the days when all they had to do was hunt Leviathans or close the gates of Hell. When their enemies were clear and defined and had weaknesses and strengths. When you could just point Dean in a direction, tell him to kill something, and afterward, he could have a beer. When he wasn’t fighting the world and his own stupid brain and the lingering sensation that along the way, he’s irrevocably fucked up.

“Like I said,” he begins, picking up his blade off the ground. “It’s a long story. You know where any are?”

“I ain’t a damn florist,” Benny begins, but starts walking in a definite direction anyway, “but I just might know where you can get this little flower.”

Glancing at Cas, who isn’t looking back, Dean follows.

---

It’s always easier in Purgatory.

Stripped of the need to sleep or eat, with survival as the only law, priorities become clearer. Pure, Dean had called it. At the time he’d meant that he’d turned into a machine, the perfect soldier, the perfect killer, but he doesn’t wonder if he’d also meant something else. Because in Purgatory, Dean looks easier, breathes easier, wants easier.

In Purgatory, Dean doesn’t pretend that he doesn’t want Cas.

Last time it led to him tearing a bloody path through the place looking for Cas, flinging prayers into the ether every night in the vain hope that Cas would hear him and come back. This time, it leads to him looking, staring, the same way that Cas used to look at him. Shameless, longing. On the occasions where Benny’s eyes follow his look, Dean doesn’t pretend to be ashamed, doesn’t drop his gaze in mock coyness.

Dean is running out of reasons why he’s angry at Cas, which is bad, because if he does that, then all that’s left will be regret.

Benny tells them that they’re going towards a swamp, where the only flowers that he knows of thrive. Dean follows, for lack of any other plan. And Cas...Cas follows Dean, and if Dean deliberately unfocuses his mind, he can pretend that it’s just like old times, him and Cas and Benny tramping their merry way through Purgatory, when the only thing they had to do was survive.

They’ve moved so far beyond that--Dean doesn’t want to survive, he wants to thrive. He sees it now, reflected back to him in the mossy undergrowth and half-dead plants. He doesn’t want to live from hunt to hunt, monster to monster, always something breathing down his back. He wants to stop, if only for a moment. Wants there to be a reason worth stopping.

Cas. Cas is the reason, Cas is all the reasons.

It was always easier, in Purgatory.

---

They don’t go unnoticed.

Just like old times, traveling with an angel, even a weakened one, is enough to draw plenty of eyes their way. There are plenty of little skirmishes along the way, fights that are won with little difficulty. Between the three of them, they make quick work of anything unlucky enough or stupid enough to venture across their path.

It’s after one of these fights, when Dean and Benny are flicking the blood off their blades and Cas is standing on the periphery, doing whatever the fuck he does in Purgatory, that Benny leans in close.

“So should I ask what’s gong on between you two?”

There was a time that Dean could hide everything from the world. There was a time that no one knew what he was thinking. Now...Rowena, Adam, Benny...apparently he’s an open fucking book for anyone who cares to come along and flip through the pages.

“It’s fine,” Dean says shortly, because Benny might be one of the best friends he’s ever had, but there are some things that are just too close to the heart for Dean to talk about.

Benny scoffs, a rueful smile on his face. “Brother, the last time you were here, you tore this place a new one looking for that angel. And now...The hell happened between you that y’all can’t even look at each other? The hell is so bad that you’re gonna let him come back here alone?”

Shame curls hot in Dean’s gut. Hell, Purgatory, Heaven--how many places has he flung Cas into, alone, just for his sake? How many times has Cas gone, all for the reason that Dean asked him? How many times has Cas demanded that Dean return the favor, that Dean give up something, anything, for him?

“We’ve got to keep moving,” Dean says gruffly. “There’s a time limit on that portal and I don’t have the time to find another one.”

---

They find a flower. Whether or not it’s a Leviathan blossom remains unknown, but it’s a fucking flower, and It’s Purgatory, so Dean snatches it. He snatches several, just to be on the safe side. They’re a vicious, vibrant purple, one that seems unnatural in the already unnatural dim light of Purgatory. They’re rimmed with a dull yellow and, when Dean gets too close, give off a sickly sweet scent that would turn his stomach if he’d let it.

For all that he was chomping at the bit to get to this point, Cas watches Dean pocket the flowers with no words spoken. Dean doesn’t think that they’ve said more than three sentences to each other the entire time that they’ve been here. Part of that is Benny, acting as a natural buffer between them, but part of that is them, the sick poison that’s crept between them, corroding everything in its path until they’re hanging on by a single, rusted thread.

They’re silent as they walk back towards the portal. Dean is jittery in his skin--no way that it was this easy, no fucking way--Where’s the ticking clock, where’s the monsters descending upon them, where are the obstacles put up in front of them just to make them dance? But it appears like it is that easy, at least for the moment.

“What are your plans?” Dean finally asks Benny. Even though it was Benny’s choice to stay behind in Purgatory, he’s never quite given up that guilt, never been able to absolve himself of seeing his friend’s head roll on the ground. “We’ve got a portal. No restrictions apply.”

Benny scuffs the ground with his toe. “It sounds nice,” he admits, before he looks at Dean. “But you know the same problems will just be there waiting for me. Plus, it sounds like your place is kinda going to shit. I’ll stay here. Turns out that I’m pretty good at Purgatory.”

Dean accepts it without speaking, doesn’t say that he understands, because he was always better at Purgatory as well.

“In fact, I think this is where I get off the train. You’re close enough that you’ll make your portal with time to spare. I’ll stay behind, try to keep any stragglers off your tail.”

“You can come with us,” Dean tries again, because it’s been good, having Benny here, having someone who is on his side without needing to hear Dean explain himself thirty times, because Dean’s lost too many friends in this life--

“Naw,” Benny says, face splitting in a grin. “Out there, you’re fighting God. Here, I just get to beat up wolves and vamps. Out of the two of us, I’ve got the easier job.” He claps Dean’s shoulder. “See you on the other side brother.” He nods to Cas before he disappears into the forest.

Dean spends a long moment staring after him, trying to parse through his emotions to determine what he feels the most. After a few seconds, Cas comes to stand next to him. He doesn’t say anything, which is a comfort, because Dean doesn’t know what the hell he would say in this situation.

Once upon a time, there would have been a hand on his shoulder, the feel of another body bumping into his. Cas might still be figuring out the intricacies of human comfort, but he learned the lesson about physical contact easily enough. Right now, Dean’s skin is aching for that touch, for that comfort that Cas used to give up so freely. He has to clench every muscle he has and a few that he doesn’t just to stop himself from leaning into Cas.

“We need to go,” Dean finally says, through gritted teeth. “That portal ain’t staying open forever.”

---

Cas walks faster than him, so he ends up in front, blade in hand. Dean falls behind, thinking about Benny, about Adam, about Lee, about Sam and Eileen--about a whole bunch of shit that he doesn’t want to think about it. About how every time he and Sam talk about the endgame, Dean always mentions that it would have to be someone who was in the life. Someone who understood it.

About how every time he and Sam describe their endgames, Dean has a little comparative checklist in his head that he goes through, like Cas can do that, and Cas does that, and Cas would do that.

And he thinks about the last time he was here, about how desperate he’d been to find Cas. About how he spent a year hunting through monsters, covered in blood and dirt, hurling prayers into the night, hoping beyond hope that he’d finally hear something from Cas. About how Benny had said Forget it, he’s either dead or he ain’t answering, we gotta go, and Dean had said, Not Cas. If he ain’t answering then there’s a reason. I told you, I ain’t leaving here until I find him. And then Cas had a reason, which was I was doing it to keep you safe and--

It’s Cas. It’s always been Cas.

Dean stops, almost tripping over his own feet as he does so. Ahead of him, Cas continues, implacable as he ever was, but that’s not all he is. Not anymore. Dean can peer close and see the cracks of him, the spaces where Cas has burst out of the skin that he first had, the places where he’s grown into this new, wondrous creature. And Dean’s used those cracks to hurt Cas, slid his words in where they would hurt the most, but he’s done with that now, he just wants--

It was always easier in Purgatory.

Dean closes his eyes and does the best job he can of calming himself down. Then, he does what he hasn’t done in years--He thinks, hard as he can, at Cas’ retreating back.

Castiel.

Ahead of him, he can hear Cas’ footsteps drag to a startled stop. Dean keeps his eyes closed, the better to imagine the soft ‘O’ of surprise that Cas’ mouth always falls into whenever someone manages to get the drop on him. It doesn’t happen often.

Cas, you got your ears on?

Praying like this is a luxury. It always was, moments stolen from the constant blood and filth, seconds where Dean could close his eyes and pretend, just for a second, that there was something golden and his out there. Now, with a clock ticking down the seconds above their head, prayer is an indulgence that they can’t afford. But if not now, then when? If not here, then where?

Fix it, Rowena had said, and Dean had stared at her and hadn’t asked the one word that was on his lips--How?

Dean opens his eyes and fixes them on Cas. Cas, who hasn’t turned around, but whose fists are clenched at his side. His spine is a straight rod of tension that radiates outward.

I just wanted to...Shit, there’s so much that I need to tell you. I guess I should start by saying that I’m sorry, right? I know that it wasn’t your fault, any of it. I should have told you that before. And I’m sorry for snapping and...shit.

Dean’s eyes close as he realizes just how much he has to apologize for. They don’t have time for him to recount the thoughtless, petty cruelties of past years, all the times he’s snapped at Cas, the times that he’s dumped his frustrations and doubts squarely on Cas’ shoulders. Guy has to carry his own shit; he shouldn’t have to carry Dean’s as well.

I just...with all this shit going down, I realized that either one of us could kick it anytime. And I don’t...I don’t want you to think that I hate you. Rowena’s words echo in his mind, along with Adam’s, along with Lee’s.

Fix it.

Since when do we get what we deserve?

Aren’t we owed a little happiness?

Cas hasn’t turned around, but Dean can see the faint tremors which shake through his body. Without seeing Cas’ face, Dean has no idea of what he’s thinking, so he presses on, heedless, reckless--

There’s no world where I don’t want you with me. Just because...because Cas. If it ain’t you and me, then it ain’t no good. And I want you with me through all of it--And I know I fucked up, and I’m sorry, and I hope to god that you can believe me when I say that I’m going to try to be better. To do better.

Slowly, like tectonic plates shifting, Cas turns around. His face is a roadmap of the years spent together, the fighting, the bitterness, the loss, the pain, but also of the good stuff--the laughs, the friendship, the flirting, the excited little hitch in Dean’s chest whenever he walks into a room and finds Cas there waiting for him. The reassurance of always having Cas at his side. The peace found in his presence.

Dean prays, eyes locked on Cas’ face.

Whatever kind of future guys like me get...I want you there. Good, bad, more of the same...I want you there. With me.

It’s as close to confession as Dean might ever get. Those three words don’t leave his lips often, but maybe. He looks at Cas’ eyes, gone wide with shock and hope and thinks maybe one day.

Cas moves. He walks towards Dean, away from the portal, with slow, aching steps. Dean trembles as he comes closer, the weight of years pressing down on him, the realization that this might be it wrapping him in cold, clammy arms.

Cas stands less than an arm’s length away from him. He looks and Dean, and Dean looks at him, and Dean never thought that he would miss the staring between them, but my god, seeing Cas’ face is a revelation.

“We need to hurry,” Cas says finally, his voice soft. Something vulnerable lurks in the spaces between vowels, hangs on the last inflection.

And as Dean waits, Cas’ hand stretches out towards him, fingers wrapping slowly around his wrist. The pads of Cas’ fingers press against his pulse point, reassuring and soothing and something in Dean that’s been clenched tightly for weeks breaks and relief floods through his body.

“Cas,” he says, a world held in the single syllable, but Cas just squeezes his wrist.

“Later,” he says, in that voice that makes Dean believe everything that he says. “Later, I promise.”

And this time, when he turns back towards the portal, Dean is at his shoulder, their fingers brushing and tangling as they head back home.

It was always easier in Purgatory.

---

There are as many worlds as kinds of days, and as an opal changes its colors and its fires to match the nature of a day, so do I.--John Steinbeck

---

Tags!

@screamatthescreen @queenvee08 @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover @dizzypinwheel @homeriics @deansbff @stay-inside-the-salt-ring

#spn spoilers #supernatural #destiel #destiel fic #destiel fanfic #spn15 #spn season 15 #15x08 #15.08 #15.08 coda #dean winchester #castiel #benny lafitte #coda fic #dothwrites #welcome to the end #fare thee well spn

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agusvedder · 5 years

Text

A theory you won’t like.

Okay so I was thinking... I’m having troubles to digest Archangel Michael stuff in episode 15x08 “Our Father Who Aren’t in Heaven”. He doesn’t look at ALL like the Michael we been knowing all these years. I know I know, we been hearing by Lucifer and Chuck that Michael in the cage was crazy mad and stuff but this isn’t the point ‘cause they were lying and we can see that now. Even Michael’s plans were to stay with Adam on earth because when Adam asked if he’s going back to heaven he answered “My brothers are dead. My father never returned. In so many ways, I'm alone” but at least he had Adam.

The thing is that, as soon as he’s confronted about his loyalty to his father, he never doubted, he trusts him blindly.

When Lilith confronted him about it, he said “If that's true if he can come talk to me himself”.

When Cas confronted him, he said “ You've come to tell me that God, my father, creator of all things, is my enemy?”

When Sam and Dean confronted him, he said “I'm not aware of anything. You're asking me to trust you. You, who doomed me, you, who let Lucifer walk free while your own brother sat in hell” - “If my father is back, he will usher in Paradise” (Yeah Mike, he was in Paradise, Vegas) - “ I won't hear this. You're lying. I don't know what your agenda is, but you're lying”

But the interaction that hurt the most was then Adam confronted him.

Adam: “The point is parents keep secrets, right? Does it hurt to ask the question?” Michael: “It would. It would mean that I doubt him. The good son, the favorite, doubts his father”

And then Cas went taunting him again to achieve planting inside his head all the memories he had from Chuck, and as soon as he walked in, he said “I'll spare you the effort. I'm not gonna betray my father and everything I've believed in.”

I mean, he was pretty confident that he wasn’t betraying Chuck or wasn’t going to do anything against him, because he is his FATHER.

“Leave, Get Out, I want you dead, We didn’t bond”

That’s what he said to Cas minutes before he changed his mind. That easy? It just doesn’t convince me.

He made the whole bunker tremble just to let them know he reached a conclussion... or maybe it was something different that made the Bunker tremble? Maybe Chuck fulfilling his son’s wish to talk in person? Chuck is a manipulative bitch and he can make anyone believe anything, especially to his son, the one who keeps defendind him after being locked in a cage in hell for 10 years (take note that 10 years for an Archangel as old as the creation itself is not that long). What if Chuck invented a whole story and showed him a different reality? Who would Michael believe? His father or Castiel?

The answer is pretty definitive for me: His father.

Michael decided to help them, and he looked sincere, he really did, he definitely looked hurt by what his father has done. But maybe it was a TRAP.

Yep, A TRAP (15X09)

What if Michael sent Dean and Cas back to purgatory because he wanted to trap them there for Chuck to have time to abduct Sam, and to be free of danger if Dean noticed he was missing? I mean, it wouldn’t be a surprise for me at least, because I remember the Michael we met. Like my friend @verobatto-angelxhunter pointed in her post about the Michaels and Dean we were very surprised to see this Mike is not the same as the AU one, or even the same archangel he was in season 5 when he possessed John Winchester and Adam. But he is. He wasn’t with Adam, because they have a different relationship, they’re friends, partners and only have each other. But why would he change his mind so drastically just in a couple of minutes?

Besides, maybe it’s lazy writing, but the ingredients for a spell to lock GOD away (I mean, GOD.God.) were all things they had in the Bunker except ONE? Nah, it just doesn’t look plausible to me.

And that Ingredient happens to be A LEVIATHAN BLOSSOM.

Purgatory is a place Chuck created to get rid of Leviathans because they were creatures who eat angels. “The Piranha that will eat the whole aquarium”, and I want to point out something definitely super interesting that @staycejo1 said some time about Leviathans.

“Leviathans are all black goo. Does this remind you of ANYTHING or ANYONE? Maybe the EMPTY created he Leviathans and that’s why he’s so pissed at Castiel”

This will destroy the theory that God created Leviathans, and it actually makes sense. They were the first beasts and then God locked them away. Maybe God and The Empty were pals until he did that and they parted ways. Reminder: this was long before archangels and humanity were created. What if the Empty was like “Okay, you lock my children away? I will soak in empty every angel you create after they die”

(This will also explain why the Empty is helping Billie to plot against Chuck, and why Old Death would lie about the origin of the Leviathans).

You can read my meta about Chuck, Billie, The Empty and the Old Death here.

Leviathans are creatures Cas had inside himself, that would be the first point for the Empty to be interested in Cas, the second one was that he’s the one that got away, and the third is currently the deal they’re holding. When Cas achieve happiness, he will die and go to the empty.

Now, pointing this out, the deal Cas and The Empty made, was sealed in heaven. God is absolute there, he knows everything about it and it’s probably aware of it.

What if God thought the only way possible to get rid of Cas was in the hands of Leviathans, children of his enemy and eaters of angels, so that’s why he manipulated Michael into send them to purgatory, close the rift and TRAP them there?

He knows there is a human portal there and Dean already crossed it, so Dean would be safe, Cas on the other hand...

Chuck is desperate to get rid of Castiel, so maybe this is the only “poetic way” he found for his ending not to be ruined by solving everything with a snap of his fingers. So either he’s planning Cas to die in Purgatory or planning for him to stay stuck there forever because there would be no way out for him.

What Chuck won’t see coming is the obvious solution that will allow Cas to cross the human portal...

VESSEL SHARING.

Not only @emblue-sparks , @verobatto-angelxhunter and @paper-lilypie talked about this in their metas, but now I bring more evidence for this to MAYBE become real.

In the 15x09 promo we can hear Dean screaming “The monsters are everywhere” so they definitely found troubles along the way, also we can see Dean ALONE in the images of the promo, so... hear me out.

What if this time Dean convinces Cas to ride shotgun inside of him like he did with BENNY the last time?

“Together, we are one” or “We’re together, we’re one” That’s what the spell mean. And it remind me of certain profound bond I know and love.

(”WE ARE” rings a bell?)

So if Cas rides shotgun (letting Dean take complete control of his body, because he respects him, not like AU!Michael) he will LEAVE his own body, so he will be inside Dean until episode 12 that Jack comes back and maybe between him and Billie, they will rebuilt his body. I mean, the empty sent him back with a new tan, a new trenchcoat and another hair style so anything is possible!

(This is part of what @paper-lilypie wrote on her theory! go read her!)

So they will come back home with Cas hidden inside Dean’s body though the human portal. and Cas will stay there hidden. It’s not like Dean doesn’t trust him enought to let him inside his head.

*LilithsGifFORESHADOWING.gif*

THAT was in episode 14x03, and then in 14x10 this happened.

Cas went again inside his head, this time with Sam on his side.

So they will be sharing Dean’s body for a while, and the prayer will be with Cas inside his head, so that’s why we won’t have an answer from Cas’ side right away.

Okay and another thing I wanna point out is that season 15 is from beginning to end FOR THE FANS, so they’re bringing characters into the show not by coincidence, they’re bringing them with a purpose, for us to REMEMBER specific things.

First they brought Belphagor in Jack’s body, who reminds us to Dean's time in hell, to Michael in the cage and to spice things up between Cas and Dean. Then they brought back Kevin, to remind us there’s no way for a soul to go into heaven because now god is an enemy. Then they brought back Eileen, knowing well she couldn’t go into heaven, Sam brought her back by using the spell Jack used on Mary that it didn’t work. Then they brought back LILITH, to remind us the original apocalypse and how much the guys have upgraded. Then they brought back Rowena, to give the guys an ally in hell. Then they brought back Adam and Michael.

So why would they bring Benny for 30 seconds letting him die under a red light?

That’s right, for us to remember the vessel sharing.

Coincidence? Nope.

This is the season to bring back.

Cas will return one way or another, just like Jack.

We just have to wait and see.

Disclaimer: THIS IS A SPEC BASED ON EVIDENCE I FOUND ALONG THE WAY.

Tagging: @verobatto-angelxhunter @metafest @bre95611 @legendary-destiel @mrsaquaman187 @emblue-sparks @paper-lilypie

#Supernatural Meta #SPN S15 #SPN 15X09 #The Trap #Castiel #dean winchester #Sam Winchester #Chuck #Billie the Reaper #jack kline #SPEC

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wayward-mikaelson · 4 years

Text

Centuries-Thirteen

Word Count: 1886

Pairing: Michael x Reader

Characters: Reader, Michael, Dean, Sam, Cas

About: Michael and Reader have a in depth conversation that leads on to other things

Warnings/Trigger Warnings: Language, Sexual Tension that leads to a hot make out session, Angst,

A/N: Don’t know what just happened. The characters just took over my brain and the keyboard just wrote that hot kiss part. WOW! JUST WOW! FUCK I WISH MICHAEL DID THAT TO ME! AND THE FINGER TO HIS LIPS!!!

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Chapter Twelve

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I sit staring at the warm cup in my hands. To my right is the archangel blade Dean left for me. I have been cooped up in this motel room for the last three hours. Dean knew I didn't want to stay behind and keep an eye on Michael but, knowing that a possible slip through angel radio could also mean a trap. Dean didn't want to take any chances with me. He wanted me to stay put and to stay safe.

"Besides," Dean says in a low voice while brushing his lips across my cheek to my ear. The movement sent shivers throughout my body. "It's plain as day that he has a thing for you still. I'll be back before you know it. So save me a shower." Then he and Sam were gone just like that.

I sit back and look at Michael. He's still in that damn grey suit. The suit isn't tight but it sure does hug all the right places. Michael sits with his hands folded and his eyes aimed directly at the table top. I wonder what's going through his mind right now.

As if on cue, Michaels eye lift up and connect with mine. Those crystal clear blue eyes that seem to look deep into my soul. Those crystal clear blue eyes that stirs something old inside me. Something that I've been trying to push down since we left the bunker. I quickly divert my eyes away and stare at the awful wall paper on the motel walls.

"It's okay, you know," Michael says softly. His voice has me slowly moving my eyes back towards him. "This vessel was really quite...what's the word the women use today? Ah, that's right, eye candy." Michael flashes an almost all too perfect smile at me. I look down at the cup as I catch my breath in throat.

"How would you know that?" I ask him keeping my eyes down. I have to admit, this vessel was very distracting and fucking attractive. "I thought Branson Gillian was dead."

"Oh, he is," I hear the shifting of his body and the chair being pushed back. "I still have access to his memories. He lead quite the lovely life."

I look up and his standing by the window looking outside. "He must have been a great man."

"He was, and now he rests peacefully now," Michael makes his way towards the door. "Come, lets go for a small walk. It looks like you could use some air."

Before I could protest and tell him that walking around could be a horrible idea, Michael is already outside standing in the sun. He turns back in my direction and beckons me outside. I rolls my eyes and reluctantly follow him. "This is such a bad idea," I say to him pocketing the blade I took from the table.

Michael walks us behind the motel where a path leads into the forest. I stop and stare at him, wondering if this was trick to get me alone. Michael looks at me and must have seen the worry and possibly the fear written all over my face.

"Don't worry, YN," He says brushing the back of his free hand on the same cheek the Dean brushed his lips on some hours before. His hand rests at the bottom of my neck on my collarbone. "I've learned my lesson. I won't hurt you. I won't trick you. This is just two, friends taking a short walk to get some air." Michael drops his hands and I instantly feel the goosebumps form. He holds out his arm to me like a gentleman at a formal dance. "Shall we?"

We walk the small path mostly in silence. Michael will point out the beauty around us and I can't help but agree with him about it all. The trees are a beautiful shade of green that you can only imagine when reading a book, sort of like Dean's eyes. The flowers that had bloomed along the pathway were bright and colorful. Michael bends down breaks off a flower and turns to me holding it out.

"Relax," his voice is calm as he can see the look on my face. "Again, just a friend giving you a flower with no strings attached."

I slowly take it and out of habit, I smell it. It smells really nice and it makes me smile. "Thank you," I smile softly. "You know what, my feet are starting to kill me, let's sit right here, relax for a bit, and then head on back to the motel."

"Alright," Michael walks us off the path to sit in the grass. "What's on your mind?" He asks the moment we are sitting.

"Wow," I say stretching out my back. "Um, well, honestly," I hesitate and look at the grass below me. "I guess I can ask about that mark you put on me about a year-ish ago." I look back up and see Michael watching me closely. It was hard concentrating when his new vessel was attractive. "And don't give me that you were special and different bullshit. There's more behind it."

Michael looks down at the ground too and I can see him relieving the past. When he looks up at me, I see something that I don't think I've ever seen before. "You're right," He says. "There is more. When you came to free Dean from the grip I had on him, I saw the love, the passion, and the drive in your eyes to do whatever it took to keep the man you loved safe. And I wanted that. So I selfishly and dangerously marked you and used Dean's image in your head to get what I wanted. I used you and your body. Just to get what I wanted, power. Seeing that now, after my time in that crystal prison, I knew I made a mistake. When I saw you for the first time out of that prison, I knew right then and there that the feelings I faked for you, were real. And I know that with the mark and the bind gone, your feelings for me are gone too. But I'm hoping that maybe something deep down you still have some sort of feelings for me. If not, when all this is done, I will leave and you will never have to hear from me or see me again."

I just sit there and stare at him. "That's a lot of words for I'm in love with you so I'm sorry for being a dick." I say softly and slowly. I go to look away but, Michael's hand it there on my chin turning my face back to him.

"You asked," he continues to hold my chin between his two fingers. The touch sends sparks throughout my body. "I answered. Truthfully too."

I use a hand to slowly remove Michaels from my chin but, my eyes don't leave his. I watch as I see a small pained look glass over his eyes. I stand up and take a few steps away from him. The feeling in my chest is tightening and it's an all too familiar feeling. I spin around and see Michael is right behind me. He has that look in his eyes where a predator makes eye contact with it's prey. I'm all too familiar with that look.

What happens next is fast.

I grab hold of Michaels coat collar and crash my lips to his. I feel his body tense up at the sudden action but as fast as it tensed up, it relaxes. Michael places his hands on my hips and guides me backwards until my back hits a tree. Michaels lips are soft and rough on mine. There's dominance behind the kiss and I don't fight back like I do when I kiss Dean. I give in to the archangel.

"I knew there was something still there," Michael says against my lips as he takes hold of my hands and pinning them to my side. "Now tell me what do you want?" He slowly drags his lips from mine to the base of my neck. Where it starts to send sparks throughout my body.

I let out sigh which is followed by a soft moan. "Shut up," I breath out. "Shut up and have your way with me." And I mean it too. I want to feel him all over me. I guess I did have buried feelings for him still and his vessel stirred them to the surface.

Michael pulls back and I can see the lustful hunger in his eyes. A small smirk starts to spread over his face. He slowly releases my hands and without taking his eyes off mine, he starts unbuttoning my pants. When they are loose enough, he spins me around so that I am facing the tree and wraps both arms around me. Michael slowly snakes a hand down both pants and underwear until his fingers slowly caress my aching, throbbing clit. Sighing and leaning my head back on his shoulder, he starts to rub it slowly in circles.

Then he stops. In an instant, we are back in the motel room. My pants are buttoned back up and I'm standing in the middle of the room. Michael is back in his seat, with a finger to his lips, telling me to keep quite. I don't understand until the motel room door opens and in walks both Sam and Dean.

"Well, Michael seems to be right," Dean walks right up to me. He kisses me gently and as he pulls back, I see Michael straighten in his seat. "There was a ton of enochian symbols painted up. Cas should be calling back with what they could mean. And why is your face flushed?" Dean takes a step back and looks me up and down.

"We had an argument," Michael says and Dean turns around to face him. Michael eyes me while he talks. "Y/N stormed out and took a walk I guess. She just got not to long ago."

"What was the argument about?" Dean asks. "It must have been a big deal to make her leave."

I rub Deans arm. "It's not worth repeating, honestly. After some time alone, I realized it was kind of silly and stupid and shouldn't be brought up again." My eyes dart over to Michael and he gives an understanding nod.

"Agreed," he says.

"Alright, well," Sam's voice perks up from the same table Michael was at. "Aside from the enochian we saw there, there wasn't anyone there. We thought it could be another..."Sam phone rings. "Hey Cas, hold up," Sam switches it to speaker. "Whats going on?"

"You guys need to get out of there now! They've been tracking Michael since he got his new vessel and Michael doesn't no it. It's a trap." The panic in Cas's voice makes us all look at each other wide eyed.

"Let's go," just as Dean turns to grab my arm, a piercing high pitched sound is heard and everyone, but Michael, falls to the ground.

The sound draws blood from everyones ears. Glass shatters all around us. The sound only gets higher to the point that we all are starting to loose consciousness. The last thing I remember before blacking out is the familiar hands of Michael picking me up.

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that-winged-rat · 4 years

Text

Redemption

Redemption ~ Part 4

*not my gif*

Summary: Y/N manages to get Michael out of Dean’s head. But it wouldn’t be a proper solution for the Winchesters if it went to plan, now would it?

Pairing: None

Characters: Y/N Y/L/N, Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Castiel, Jack, AU!Michael.

Warnings: Angst, some fluff, slight language.

Word Count: 3.2k

A/N: Okay folks! Here is what I think may well be the final part of the Redemption Series (A.K.A the first series that I’ve ever finished and not just forgotten about! Woohoo!) But... knowing me I will probably end up doing more parts. Thank you for reading this series! Feedback is always welcomed and encouraged! Enjoy :)

Masterlist Redemption Masterlist

After sorting out Sam, Y/N went out for a walk, clearing her mind so she could come up with a plan to get Michael out of Dean’s head and – hopefully – get rid of him for good.

She could always expel him from Dean’s mind and destroy him in his raw angelic form. But there was always the risk that he would escape and posses someone who had no idea what they were agreeing to, which would still end up with the world torched.

She couldn’t kill him while he was in Dean’s head because she might as well be a human. And even if she did find a way to access her abilities that way, Dean would be in the cross-fire, and that would against the whole objective – protecting and saving Dean.

Y/N sighed and threw her head back to look at the sky, her tongue running along the inside of her lips. There was one way that it could work, it wouldn’t be easy for anyone. Especially her.

But it was a necessary risk.

Having made up her mind on the method, she now had to decide if she would tell the others on exactly what the plan was. She knew that they – mainly Castiel – would disapprove and try to talk her into finding another way. But there was no other way. And at least this way, she might get what she wanted most. And if there was that slight possibility of that, she wouldn’t let anyone get in her way, so she decided to keep it to herself and headed back to the bunker.

When she got back, she spotted Sam, Cas and Jack sitting at the map-table, halting their conversation when Y/N walked through the door. She walked down the stairs and took a seat at the table.

Sam looked at her expectantly. “So, you got a plan?” He asked, leaning forward in his seat and intertwining his fingers in front of him.

She sighed. “No. I was just gonna wing it,” she said with a straight face, shrugging while looking Sam dead in the eyes.

Cas frowned and looked around in confusion and frustration. “Y/N, what do you mean you don’t have a plan? This is Dean, you can’t just w–”

“Jesus Christ, Cas,” Y/N cut him off. “You’ve known Sam and Dean for how many years? I would’ve thought you would be able to know when someone’s being sarcastic.” He sighed and gave her a bitch-face. “Of course I have a plan.”

“Which is...” Sam trailed off, prompting Y/N to continue.

She sighed again. “I’m gonna find Michael in Dean’s head and get rid of him in there. Simple enough,” she said, leaning back in her chair and crossing her arms behind her head.

Jack frowned. “How are you going to do that though? Wouldn’t you just be a mental projection? That’s what happened last time,” Jack said, looking to Sam and Cas for confirmation, and they both nodded at him.

Y/N tapped the side of her nose a couple of times. “A magician never reveals their tricks,” she said, sighing when she saw that wasn’t enough of an answer for any of them. “Relax. I’ve got it covered.”

“Are you sure you’re able to do this?” Cas asked.

Y/N rolled her eyes. “Yes, I’m sure,” she said, frustrated with how many times she’s had to answer that question. “I’m just looking forward to killing this asshole. Even if he’s not from this world.”

“Why?” Jack asked, picking up on the venom and hatred that seeped out with her words.

“Isn’t the fact that he's a bratty douche just trying to get daddy’s attention reason enough?”

“Right. Well, I’ll go get Dean,” Sam said, pushing himself up from the table and walking through to the kitchen where Dean was having a sandwich. Not long later, the two of them returned and joined Y/N, Jack and Cas, who had migrated into the library.

Dean sat in a seat and Y/N moved to stand behind him, leaning on the back of his chair. He rolled his shoulders back and clenched then unclenched his fists a few times, bracing for impact.

“Let’s do this,” Dean said, as if psyching himself up.

“Y/N, are you sure you’re up for this?” Castiel asked, mirroring Y/N’s stance on the opposite side of the table. Sam stood next to him, arms crossed, while Jack stood at the end of the table.

She just winked, traces of a smile on her face, as she placed her fingers firmly on Dean’s temples. Her eyes glowed the same red that Jack had been threatened with, but this time it seemed less scary and intimidating. Scarlet red veins crawled along Dean’s face as Sam shifted on his feet uncomfortably at the sight of his brother – Dean had his hands in tight fists and his jaw clenched through the pain.

And then it stopped.

Dean’s face went slack and his posture relaxed, as Y/N’s eyes gently fluttered shut, and the other three knew that it had worked.

---

Y/N calmly looked around, taking the absolute nothingness that surrounded her. There was no light at all, but somehow she could see Dean clear as day, as he stood a few feet in front of her.

“I feel like there should be tumbleweed,” she remarked. Dean spun around and his eyes landed on her. “And maybe some crickets.”

Dean sighed. “Okay, what’s the plan?”

“You take me to where Michael’s locked away, and I save the day. Simple as that,” she said, smiling widely at the end.

“Alright. It’s a bar,” he said. Y/N sighed and motioned her hands, asking him to continue. “Rocky’s bar.”

She clapped her hands together. “Well, thank you for your cooperation, Mr Winchester. I’ll see you on the other side.” She shrugged. “Hopefully.”

Dean frowned. “What the Hell are you–” he said, not getting to finish before he jolted awake in the library, surrounded by worried faces. He turned in his seat to look behind him for Y/N, but frowned again when he saw her unconscious body on the floor.

“Dean? W–What happened? Did it work?” Sam asked rushing round the table to meet his brother.

“I don’t–I don’t know.”

Cas’ eyebrows stitched together. “What do you mean ‘you don’t know’?” He asked.

“I mean, I told her where Michael was and she said that she’ll see me on the other side, hopefully,” Dean said, looking up to his brother and best friend. “I’m think she’s gonna try take him on herself.”

---

Y/N stalked through the deserted bar, her eyes scouring every crevice as she did.

“Oh, Mikey,” she taunted in a sing-song voice. “Where are you, pretty boy?” She took a few more steps before her eyes fell on a metal door that looked like it had been bashed on the inside. “Something tells me there,” she muttered to herself.

Y/N walked towards the door with confidence. She took out the pin that was the only thing from keeping Michael from escaping, and opened the door. Michael stood, a smirk on his face, in the middle of the once tidy supply cupboard.

“I’ve killed every cambion I’ve come across. I don’t see why you’ll be any different, filth,” Michael spat out, sauntering out of the cupboard and into the bar.

“Hey, no need to be nasty,” Y/N said, raising her hands in fake surrender. She turned around and walked over to the bar, taking a seat at the stool, and swivelled around to face Michael, who stood behind her. “Especially someone who wants to help you.”

Michael tilted his head to the side, curious. “What could you possibly help me with?”

“I have an offer for you,” Y/N said, leaning back and resting her elbows on the bar. “I become your vessel, you get out of this”– she looked at her surroundings–” place and get to go on your little tantrum.”

Michael laughed. “And give up my true vessel. Now why would I do that?”

“Think about it, Mike,” Y/N started. “Dean has people who love him, people who would do anything for him. And we both know that they wouldn’t stop until you’re either locked away for good, or dead. I have no one like that. If you take me, you would have a strong vessel and nobody to stop you.”

Michael was silent for a moment. “So, let me get this straight, you say yes to me and you’ll give me free range, to do whatever I want?” Michael asked. Y/N shrugged, a smirk on her face, which was enough of an answer for Michael. “You do realise that I’m stronger than you. You won’t be able be double cross me on your best day.”

“Why would I try to double cross you?”

Michael brushed down his jacket. “Even though I’m trapped in this rat-hole, I’m still in Dean’s head, I can still see his thoughts. And I know that you’ve helped the Winchesters before. So how do I know that it’s not the case here?”

Y/N scoffed, and jumped off the stool, sighing. “They tricked me, made my life even more miserable than it already was. Why would I wanna help them?”

“You’re offering an alliance?”

“I’m offering an alliance,” Y/N repeated.

Michael ran his tongue over his lips in thought, smiling after a moment of silence. “You got yourself a deal. Just say the word and we’ll get this show on the road.”

“Yes.”

---

Sam looked away from his book and to Y/N’s limp body, which was now sitting on one of the armchairs in the library. Looking at her, no one would suspect that she was a sarcastic woman who did everything in her power to push away people who tried to help her. She was peaceful.

Shaking the thought from his head, he turned back to the book he was reading. But his mind was too occupied with the current happenings to register any of the words. Why would Y/N chose to face Michael alone? She seemed to know how powerful he is, if she just told them then they could’ve helped. Or maybe this whole thing was a double cross.

A soft groan pulled him from his thoughts. He looked over to where Y/N was lying and saw that she was stirring, her eyes fluttering open.

“Dean! Cas!” He called out and made his way over to Y/N. She squeezed her eyes shut briefly when they opened too fast. “Hey. What happened?” Sam asked her once she was fully awake.

“Sam,” Dean said urgently as him and Cas marched into the room. Sam looked up to them. “Michael’s gone.”

Sam whipped his head to look back to Y/N, a smile made it’s way on her face that made his stomach churn. None of them knew her that well, but all of them knew that that wasn’t Y/N.

“Michael,” Sam whispered.

“Bet you didn’t see this coming,” Y/N – or rather Michael – said.

Both the Winchesters and Castiel now stood in defensive stances, ready for when things got messy. Not if, when.

“How’d you get her to say yes?” Dean asked, taking a cautious step forward.

Michael laughed. “You think this was my idea?” The three men frowned in confusion. “This was all her idea. She really–” he stopped abruptly and doubled over as if he’d been punched in the stomach. He let out a grunt but it turned into a laugh. “Oh, she’s a feisty one, isn’t she? She’s putting up a fight. Stronger than she looks. Too bad she won’t break free in time. The first thing she’s gonna see is all of your bodies, lying on the floor because of a stupid decision she made.”

“You really love the sound of your own voice, don’t you?”

Michael grimaced again and stumbled back, slamming Y/N’s fist on the table in frustration. Cas glanced over at one of the doorways, seeing Jack peek through. He caught Jack’s gaze in his and gently shook his head, telling the young Nephilim to stay put.

The archangel clenched his fist, Sam, Dean and Cas all falling to the floor, clutching their throats and gasping for air. Jack went to step forward but stopped when Cas shook his head again, this time with more warning.

Jack frowned when Michael started coughing, a mixture of blood and grace spilling out of Y/N’s mouth and flowing onto the floor. The hold he had on Sam, Dean and Cas releasing and the three of them swallowed the air like their was no tomorrow. Michael fell to the floor, clutching his chest. His grace snaked out of Y/N’s mouth until it all hovered in front of them, as a steady flow of blood trickled down her chin and out of her ears, her body falling limp against the bookshelves.

Jack stepped forward and walked over to the floating cloud of archangel grace, ignoring the voices of the three men on the floor, begging him not to risk his soul. The golden glow coming from his eyes reflected on his cheeks as he raised his hands. The mass of light blue started swirling in front of the four of them.

“You won’t hurt anyone ever again!” Jack shouted before the grace shrunk in size and turned into orange dust... then nothing, only leaving a slither which made it’s way into Jack’s mouth.

“Jack?” Dean asked, pushing himself up from the floor.

“Michael,” Jack said in a monotone voice. “He’s gone.”

Sam stepped forward. “Jack, are–are you, uh...”

Jack turned around to face the three of them. “I’m me again,” he said, his eyes flashing yellow and his wings projecting on the wall behind him.

They all turned their attention to Y/N’s form when she started spluttering up more blood. Jack crouched down to her level, reaching up to the sides of her face when Sam stopped him.

“Jack, don’t. You can’t risk burning any more of your soul.”

“But... I can help her!”

“She’ll be fine. She’ll heal by herself,” Cas reasoned.

Jack hesitated, looking at her for a moment before nodding and standing up. “Okay.”

---

Jack was sat in one of the spare rooms next to the bed that occupied it. His ears listening to the steady breathing coming from Y/N and his eyes focused on the strand of hair that had fallen across her forehead, gently brushing against her skin. He didn’t bother looking up when the door creaked open behind him.

“Jack?” It was Sam. “You alright?”

“I could’ve helped her,” he said, finally turning around to look at Sam.

“Jack... we don’t know how much of your soul burned off when you killed Michael. And we can’t take any more risks like that. You need to be careful.”

Jack sighed. “I know. I just... I hate feeling so useless. What’s the point in having these powers if I can’t even use them?”

“Yeah, I–I get it Jack. Listen, all I’m asking is that you just be more careful, okay?” Jack nodded and Sam patted his shoulder before leaving the room.

Jack turned back to look at the strand of hair on Y/N’s face. He wanted to brush it away, but he knew if she caught him, he’d be a dead man. She’d stayed asleep so far, though, so she wouldn’t wake up with that. Right?

He leaned forward and reached his arm out painfully slow, though he didn’t get to reach his target.

“Touch me and you lose the arm,” Y/N said, her voice hoarse. Jack froze like a deer in headlights, too afraid to move in case it made things worse for him. Her eyes fluttered open and landed on him instantly.

“Uh, I... Sorry. You had a piece of hair on your face... it looked annoying,” he said awkwardly. Y/N groaned as she pushed herself to sit up against the headboard, the piece of hair falling back into place. “I’ll go get Cas.”

Jack got up quickly and left the room, leaving Y/N to stare blankly at the wall, alone with her thoughts. Thoughts about her short time with Michael. How he taunted her, bringing up unwanted memories and mistakes, people she’d let down. She blinked the thoughts away when the door opened. Cas walked though, Jack not far behind.

“How are you feeling?” He asked, taking a seat in the chair Jack sat in earlier.

“I’ve been better.” She shrugged. “I’ve been worse.”

Cas looked down to his hands. “Jack, would you give us a minute?”

Jack didn’t say anything as he left the room again. Cas tilted his head to look back up to Y/N, and she could tell that a lecture was coming.

“What you did was stupid, and reckless,” he started. “You could’ve died. You nearly did die. You know that we would’ve helped, right? You don’t have to do everything on your own.”

A smirk broke out on Y/N’s face. “Careful, Cas, you’re starting to sound like you actually care.”

Castiel frowned. “Because I do care.”

Y/N scoffed and looked away. “No, you don’t. The only time we’ve met before last year, was when you tried to kill me, how many years ago? You can’t care for someone you don’t even know.”

“If you said that to me a few years ago, I would’ve agreed with you. But since then, I’ve seen life from... call it a different point of view. And I’ve learnt that everybody deserves a chance, even if they think that they don’t. That includes you, Y/N.”

Y/N stared at him for a while before speaking up. “What are you trying to say?”

“I’m trying to say that you can stay here, with us. For at least a little while,” Cas said. “I know you have your reasons for staying away from people, but you can’t stay that way forever. And for people like us, forever is literally forever.”

She visibly swallowed. “Trust me when I say this, people around me – people I let myself care for – always die. Whether I lose control and they die by my hands, or there’s a pissed off whackjob after me. Either way, it never ends well. For anyone.”

Cas furrowed his eyebrows; this is the first time that he’s seen Y/N’s tough façade waver for even a second. If he hadn’t been watching her intently, he would’ve thought that he imagined the way her eyes glistened with unshed tears and her voice cracked.

He pushed the thought aside and instead, he smiled. “Join the club,” he said, then took on a serious demeanour. “Y/N, you’re gonna have to start letting people in sooner or later.”

Y/N hesitated, tapping a finger nervously on her thigh. She shook her head. “I don’t know how.”

“Then let us show you. Let us show you that you’re allowed to have good things.”

She was silent for another minute. “I’ll think about it.”

“That’s good enough for me.” Cas smiled.

“Alright, I gotta go pee,” Y/N said, groaning as she stood from the bed. She stopped just before the door and turned around to face Cas, who was still smiling slightly. “Tell anyone about this and I’ll break your dick.”

She’s back, Cas thought to himself, the threat only making his smile grow wider. He turned to fully face her. “You’re secrets safe with me.”

---

Tagged: @supernaturalenchanted @vicmc624 @deanwanddamons

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holylulusworld · 5 years

Text

The queen of Lebanon - Part 9 – The kingpin of Lebanon

Summary: Your father died years ago, all men in the business believed you are too weak to take over his Empire – they were wrong. Anyone trying to get into your hair will feel your wrath. What happens when a cocky mobster tries not only to steal your empire but your heart too?

Pairing: Mobster!Dean x Mobster!Reader, Cole Trenton, Jimmy ‘Cas’ Novak, Benny LaFitte, Arthur Ketch

Warnings: angst, ‘the family business’, mentions of characters death, love-hate relationship, hooking up, rivalry, betrayal, violence, mentions torture, age gap (reader is 28; Dean 32)

The queen of Lebanon Masterlist

Four years and 7 months ago, …

He’s panting heavily looking up at you with wide eyes as he can see the coldness in your Y/E/C orbs.

“I know what you did to my mother and Michael. I know you are a killer, a monster, Winchester. You love to make a murder look like an accident so…” Smirking you point toward the fire slowly feasting at his car. “You will die like my family.”

“Y/N, this isn’t you.” Coughing John tries to free his leg cursing as the pain makes him feel dizzy. “Don’t do this…”

“You destroyed my whole life, John. You killed my whole family and any chance I had with Dean. Now your life end with the same pain my family felt back then. Have a nice life…” Laughing you run toward your car, jumping in as Cole speeds off.

A few moments later you heart the explosion end John Winchesters' life. You wish you could say your heart is healed but all you feel is a void at the place where your heart used to be…

Now…

“Artemis has fallen, just like Ares…” Pacing around Dean’s office you bite your lower lip. “Problem is, Dean…” Standing closer to the mobster you hide your face in his neck to make sure no one can hear your words.

“Gadreel didn’t know about Frank. He wasn’t around when Charlie told us about him. She never mentioned her connection to Frank before and…” Meeting Dean’s eyes you take a deep breath. “…there’s only one person knowing Ares was my most important hideout with the best security…”

“Who?” Hushing the word Dean searches your face and he can see the disappointment. “Y/N, we need to share information. Just tell me, Baby Girl.”

“I can’t…not yet.” Choking the words out you press a piece of paper into Dean’s hand, giving him a cracked smile. “I need to be sure, Dean. If he’s a traitor, he’ll die but I can’t just kill him. Gadreel still could be the rat.”

“What did Charlie say?” Pointing toward your iPad you nuzzle your nose into Dean’s neck, inhaling his scent to calm your nerves. “Y/N?”

“Charlie said all data look original, but the phone calls, the ones coming from Gadreel’s phone look odd. Charlie found some notes Frank made. He assumed it’s fake…” Dean’s features darken, and you feel the anger radiate through his body.

“What now?” Kissing your neck Dean roams your body, not wanting to miss to touch you while he has the chance to. “We need to find the rat…”

“Trap, Dean.” Whispering your plan into Dean’s ear you feel his hands wander to your ass, squeezing it hard. “Dean, not now. I’ll call Garth, make sure he’s safe. If I can’t reach him, I know Gadreel is guilty…”

“What if Garth is alright?” Falling silent you take a deep breath. “Y/N, tell me his name…” Letting go of you Dean searches your face once again.

“Just give me two hours. The plan will reveal the rat and we will punish him. If it’s Gadreel he will pay, if it’s him then…” Swallowing the lump in your throat you give Dean a cracked smile. “I will let Arthur hurt him as no one got hurt before…”

Turning around you leave Dean’s office. He’s gulping hard as he opens the piece of paper to read the note you gave him. “Be there at 2 pm…”

“Garth called you?” Cole asks once again; relieved Gadreel didn’t harm your friend. “So, Gadreel did his job and the Sheriff is safe.”

“He did, Cole. Maybe we were wrong, or Garth was not important enough to Dick Roman to blow his cover, Cole. The Sheriff doesn’t know anything about Dick Roman or his business. Garth concentrated on the Winchesters and Crowley.”

“I see.” Nodding thoughtfully Cole gives you a warm smile and you feel a pull at your heart. “That’s good. We don’t want to involve innocent people.”

“True. Still, I must meet up with Garth later. I’ll meet him at the old restaurant my father bought years ago. It’s safe, no one knows about it except for you, me and Garth.” After telling Cole, you will go without Dean you can see his mood lighten.

“Without Dean Winchester?” Smirking Cole nudges your side. “I thought you are Siamese twins lately, Y/N. Your father wouldn’t like your collaboration with the enemy.”

“I am not collaborating with Dean Winchester. We will use his resources and men to bring Dick Roman down. After that…” Shrugging you give Cole a wink. “We will take down the Winchesters next.”

“I hate this plan for sure.” Dean is grumbling as he must watch you walk toward the building with Cole by your side. “I should be with her, Sammy.”

“Dean just calm down. Y/N has a plan, okay. Garth and his family are safe. If we want to find out who the rat is, we need to trust her instinct. I know you love her, now prove you can be a partner, not just a lover.”

“Sam is right, boss. Charlie checked the messages, Gadreel’s bank account, and the calls once again and found a trace.” Benny points toward you entering the building.

“According to the data Gadreel called Dick Roman while he was with Garth, but the Sheriff confirmed Gadreel didn’t call anyone for over ten hours. The only call he made was the one Y/N received.”

“You mean Gadreel is innocent?” Jimmy watches you nod at Cole before he follows you into the building. “Where is he then?”

“Just wait, Jimmy. Y/N is nothing but a genius…” Smirking Sam sends a message to Ketch and the others waiting for your orders. “Let’s do this…”

The building is dusty, silent and ... empty. While you walk further into the room Cole looks around, confused as Garth is nowhere to be found.

“Shouldn’t the Sheriff be here?” Cole sounds impatient and a cold shiver runs down your spine. “Y/N?”

“Why? Does this mess with your plans, brother?” Turning around you look into the barrel of Cole’s gun. While his eyes darken, and he doesn’t even try to hide his betrayal any longer you don’t even blink when he pulls the trigger.

“Did you believe I wouldn’t find out, Cole?” Aiming your gun toward his head you blink the tears away. “Did you believe Charlie and I would just swallow your bait and kill Gadreel, who survived your attack by the way.”

Cole’s eyes fill with fear as you unlock the gun. “Y/N…”

“Just tell me the reason, Cole. Tell me why you made a deal with the devil and wanted to kill me, Gadreel and all others. Explain this whole insanity to me and I’ll kill you fast.” Voice trembling you hear the others getting closer.

“Bobby…” Gasping you hear your father's name leave Cole’s lips. “He wanted to retire and leave the business to Dean Winchester.” Scoffing Cole sits onto a dusty chair, frantically moving his left hand through his hair. “He told me that you and I shall have a normal life.”

“What’s wrong with having a normal life? That’s what I wanted.” Screaming the words, you ram your fist into Cole’s face. “What did you do…?”

“I tried to talk to Bobby, tried to make him see I am the man to take over his Empire, but he was adamant and promised me a better life.” Voice cracking Cole looks up at you.

“I…I called Dick and told him I will help him taking over Dean’s Empire if he helps me getting my foster fathers…”

“You…it was you…” Pressing one hand over your mouth you step back as Dean and the others enter the building. “It was you killing my parents?”

“No…no! I just thought Dick would scare Bobby a bit, put pressure on him to give his Empire to me. I didn’t know he would kill him or Jody, I swear.”

While you lower the gun, shaking your head you close your eyes. Tears threaten to burst free, but you swallow your pain, not showing weakness once again.

“Why Cole? Was all you had not enough? Daddy loved you like his son, Cole…he loved you…” Choking on your words you fire the magazine into the wall behind Cole.

“He loved me…sure.” Scoffing Cole glares at you. “But there was not enough respect to let me take over his Empire. I swear I didn’t want him to die, but what’s done is done.”

“Still, after Dick killed my parents you gave him information.” Tossing your gun onto the table you run one hand down your face. “Why did he wait that long to strike?”

“Dick believed I would take over Bobby’s Empire, would open Lebanon to him but with you taking over, he had to wait for a chance. There was still John Winchester and Crowley.” Huffing you close your eyes.

“I helped him by taking John down, I guess. What about Crowley? Is he dead too?” Looking at Cole your features darken as he refuses to answer. “You will answer all our questions.”

“Boss? What about Gadreel?” Jimmy tries to find a way to help you, but he can see the hurting all over your face.

“Gadreel is alive. Not that Cole didn’t try to kill our friend.” Sniffling you ball your hands into fists to hit Cole one last time.

“Ketch, he’s all yours.” Meeting Arthur’s eyes you nod at him. “No holding back. Cole is fair game from now on. He’s not my brother any longer.” Grabbing your gun, you walk out of the building.

“Y/N…Sweetheart…” Dean runs after you, watching you fall to your knees in front of his car. “Baby Girl, just let me…”

“I made it easier for him, Dean.” Laughing hysterically, you look up at Dean. “I killed John and opened the door for Dick Roman a bit. I stopped the war only to bring the apocalypse. What shall we do now?”

“First, I’ll bring you home and then we will tell anyone to prepare for a worst-case scenario. Dick Roman is out there and he already killed too many of us. Gadreel is on his way back. I asked two of my men to make sure he’s safe.”

“I can’t believe Cole betrayed me, Dean. How could my brother do this to dad? He took him in after no one else wanted that bastard.” Getting up you straighten your back, looking into Dean’s eyes you swallow your pride.

“Y/N let me…” Holding out your hand you smirk as Dean looks at you, blinking a few times.

“If you still want a bond between Singer and Winchester, here’s your chance. I’ll do it, for dad and Jody. I will marry the kingpin of Lebanon to make sure everyone knows we stand united…”

“Hmmm…I’d like to make sure your cute ass is mine, but you don’t have to marry me to make sure we will stand united, Sweetheart.”

“Winchester, if you want to be the kingpin of Lebanon, shake my hand. This is how it’s done for ages. We form a bond and unite our Empires.” Shaking your hand Dean licks his lips, a dirty grin all over his face.

“I like the way you do business for sure, Baby Girl. You and I united means that no one will be able to stop us. I love you…”

“Don’t get cocky, Winchester. This is business, nothing else…” Turning on your heels you smirk as Dean follows you, muttering under his breath. “Come one, we have a traitor to torture and a wedding to plan…”

The queen of Lebanon

@alyssaforever2671, @xcastielbabyangelface, @bitchwhytho, @rosiehayes

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#The queen of Lebanon Masterlist #dean winchester #MOBSTER!AU #mobster au #mobsterdean #mobster!dean x reader #mobster!dean #mobster!dean x you #mobster!dean winchester x reader #mobster!dean x mobster!reader #dean winchester fanfic #dean winchester x you #dean winchester fanfiction #dean winchester SPN #dean winchester x reader #dean x reader #dean x you #dean winchester series

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lovedsammy · 5 years

Text

we’re burning out (and burning down); commission for @awesomesusiebstuff

Commission for @awesomesusiebstuff! The prompt was Sam and Cas rekindling their relationship after 14.19/14.20 after what happened with Jack, and how much of a role Sam had with trapping him. Cas is more disappointed with Sam instead of angry, and they get the chance to talk this out. With everything that was going on, I didn’t see an opportunity during 14.20 for much talking between them so felt 15.01 was the best chance! Hope you like it!

Takes place during 15.01. After returning back to the school, Sam and Cas take a much needed moment to grieve Jack and work some things out concerning what happened with the boy.

Sam huffs as he sifts through the Impala’s trunk. Not only were they somehow relatively low on salt rounds, but there were only two full guns available between himself and Cas. In their defense, they hadn’t had an actual ghost case in a long while. Not to mention the fact that with the way things had been lately, both he and Dean had other priorities. Sam guesses that they’d simply forgotten to restock the car with everything they usually had. It was coming back to bite them now. The current arsenal was not what he’d hoped, but it should work for the time being until they could get a break to restock. Unfortunately, a break didn’t seem to be in their future any time soon.

A thoughtless roll of his shoulder has the bullet wound smarting again, and Sam hisses, raising a hand to it out of instinct. Rubbing circle patterns on his shirt above the wound does little to ease it, but it brings him some comfort anyway.

He can feel Cas’s gaze burning through the back of his head.

“Sam --”

“I’m fine, Cas,” He interrupts shortly. “Let’s just get as many people cleared out of here as we can. The last thing we need is Chuck making a bigger spectacle of this than he already has.” He slams the hood of the Impala and tosses the angel one of the guns, and keeps the other. “The sooner we get a containment on this, the better.”

Cas doesn’t protest, nor does he bring it up again on the seemingly endless long walk through the suburban streets.

The pretty mundane town seemed quiet enough, but Sam knows better than to lower his guard. Chuck had raised souls from hell and allowed them to inhabit the bodies of the dead. If he really had undone everything that Sam and Dean had ever done, every bit of good, then that meant that this town was afflicted with not just hell-ghosts, but likely vengeance-seeking ones from his and his brother’s very first cases together.

They’d be out to get some payback.

Sam glances over at Cas. He had a feeling that the angel only decided to accompany him because he couldn’t stand to be around Dean anymore, and much less so, Belphegor. It wasn’t easy for Sam to be near the demon inhabiting Jack’s corpse, either, admittedly. But they needed him for the time being, so they had to shelve their grief for their surrogate son until a later time -- as always. The reality of the boy’s death threatens to crush Sam, and he’s sure it does for Cas, as well. At this point, the only thing keeping him walking, keeping him going, not just physically but also mentally, is the job that they have to do.

The job, saving people, saving the world - that came first.

Castiel, on the other hand, seemed to have opposite thoughts. As he was right now walking beside Sam, he was all business, a storm of well-contained fury. He was only holding back from smiting the demon all together because he knew that Sam was right, despite his own reservations. Sam understood it, more than he knew how to express. He wants to, though, wants to tell Cas that he gets it, that he’s feeling just as pained and angry about what happened with Jack, but he knows that’s not exactly true.

Cas was feeling it the worst. Cas hadn’t betrayed Jack like Sam had. Cas hadn’t turned his back on the boy, had done exactly what Sam should have, and protected him until his last breath. Sam had failed where Cas hadn’t, and he doesn’t feel that gives him the right to vent, to equalize their shared grief over the kid that they both loved like a son.

Things weren’t exactly rosy between them right now either.

There was a pointed tension between them, no longer the companionable silence that made their partnership so easy before. Now it was more of an acquaintance, an alliance formed out of necessity and a shared desire for vengeance. Sam hadn’t felt this uneasy around Cas since the early days, when the angel regarded him as lesser being, as an abomination. It took Sam a while to feel at ease with the angel back then, and like he could be allowed to be in his presence. There wasn’t exactly that same level of severity now, but it was close to it.

Sam felt ashamed to call himself one of Jack’s guardians, or Cas’s friend.

He didn’t deserve to be either.

Dean and Belphegor are off somewhere else doing… something. Sam doesn’t know what. He thinks he heard Dean mention calling Ketch, but he’s not sure. He’d blanked out a little, looking at Belphegor. He’d almost accidentally called him ‘Jack.’ It’d been on the literal tip of his tongue. He’d reeled in the slip up at the last possible second, and quickly excused himself from the room. To his surprise, Castiel had followed him outside.

“I can’t be in there,” The angel explains at Sam’s questioning look, coming to stand next to him. “It’s too much.”

Sam guiltily ducks his head. “Yeah.”

“At least we got Carla and Katie to safety.”

Sam nods absently, taking in the sorrow lines in Cas’s face. His heart aches for him. He doesn’t know how he can ever make any of this right. What happened to Jack… as much as Sam wants to blame Chuck, he can’t help but also blame himself. Part of what lead to it was his fault, and Dean’s, too.

The angel doesn’t even need to say it. Sam knows that he’s still pissed at him. And he has every right to be.

Sam knows that he’d fucked up, and accepts it, bears that responsibility. Not only had he missed the signs that Jack was soulless, but he’d gone along with Dean to lock the kid up. He’d lied to Jack and promised him redemption and instead had manipulated him into a death box. Jack was going to remain trapped in there forever, unable to escape. It was a fate worse than death, and Sam had subjected the boy that he viewed as a son to that.

Because he had followed his brother, and not gone with his gut.

But he truly hadn’t known what else to do. And maybe a selfish part of him had wanted some retribution for his mother’s death, too. He hadn’t had to experience losing her the first time. Mary Winchester had just been a name to him, the woman he knew as his mother. But he’d had no actual memories of her. She wasn’t anything tangible, anything real, to him. Until she was, and he had to lose her for the first - real - time.

He had only known a little fraction of what it meant to grieve a mother, but now he felt it in full force. It was a silent heartache, similar to how he’d felt after losing his father, but not exactly the same. Whereas with John he’d felt regret and guilt and wishing he could’ve made it right before he’d lost him, with Mary, it was pure grief. He only wished he’d had more time with her, that he could’ve saved her, that he’d seen the signs about Jack before the Nephilim had stolen her life.

A part of him had been angry at Jack, even wished him dead. But that anger was mostly directed at himself. He’d failed Jack. He’d failed to be the parent that Jack so desperately needed. Even before the remainder of his soul had burnt away, Sam hadn’t been there for Jack, not as much as he should’ve.

He gives a long sigh before he fully turns to the angel. “Say it, Cas,” He says. “Let me hear it.”

Cas seems confused. “Hear what? What are you talking about?”

Sam scoffs. “Come on, man. You know what. You can’t tell me that you’re not pissed at me. I messed up. I messed up bad. I didn’t stop Dean from blaming you, and I…. I didn’t stop what happened with Jack, either. I went along with it. Even if I didn’t agree, I went along with it. I let Jack down, and I let you down, too.”

Cas regards him for a long moment, his mouth set firmly. The first signs of any friction with Sam finally start to come to the surface for the first time that day. “Yes,” Cas agrees easily. “You did.”

Even having admitted it to himself, the words still sting. Sam blinks against the wetness. He has no right to feel hurt, he tells himself. He deserves every icy word Cas directs at him. If Cas wanted to end their friendship right now, Sam couldn’t blame him for that. If anything, he’d deserve Cas’s ire. If Cas wanted to punch him right back into Hell, Sam wouldn’t blame him.

But instead of lashing out at him, Cas sighs, hands in his trench coat pockets. “I had thought that you would be above agreeing with Dean’s misguided choices. That you, more than anyone, would put Jack’s safety above any feelings you may or may not have. He looked up to you, Sam, more than he ever did with me. I’m not as angry with you as I am disappointed because I thought you would do right by Jack. That your first inclination would be to help him, not punish him.”

Sam nods. “You’re right,” He says hoarsely.

“But I also know,” Cas continues, reaching out to grasp his shoulder. “How you can be when it comes to your brother. You didn’t agree with locking up Jack, but you went along and ignored your own instincts. You were as dishonest with yourself as were with Jack, or with me. And that has to hurt you just as much.”

Sam closes his eyes, wanting to pull away from Cas, from his forgiveness. But he can’t. “I didn’t know what else to do,” He offers. “I know it’s an excuse, and I know it was the wrong choice. I fucked up, and kept fucking up with Jack. I wasn’t there for him after Michael snatched Dean, and I should’ve been. I kept failing him. Mom…. Mom said that parental guilt was the hardest. I didn’t know how to be there for him, how to help him because I was too busy to make time for him. You were right, Cas, when you said that losing a son felt different. I couldn’t admit it to myself even then, that I saw him that way. Because admitting it meant that I was responsible for him in ways that I’ve never been responsible for anyone before. I followed Dean into it because I felt that if I wasn’t calling the shots, if I wasn’t making decisions when it came to Jack’s wellbeing ... that maybe that was for the best.”

“It wasn’t,” Cas says earnestly. “It was better that you made the choices to combat Dean’s, even if it put the two of you at odds. And you understand that now. You understood it before, when you tried to stop Dean from killing him in that graveyard. Sam, as much as you may have messed up with Jack near the end… in the end, you did do right by him.”

Sam laughs disbelievingly, now trying to pull away, but Cas doesn’t let him.

“No, listen to me. You tried to stop Dean. You shot God, and sustained this --” he moves his hand down a fraction to hover over Sam’s bullet wound -- “to stop him. You tried to protect Jack even with the possible threat to your own life. And it wasn’t the first time. You did the same thing when Lucifer stole his grace, when he was relentlessly beating on him. And I’m sure that Jack, even in his last moments, was grateful for that.”

The tears come then, and Sam sniffs, rubbing at his eyes. “I doubt that, Cas. He died in absolute agony, with all of us too fucking helpless to do anything for him. He died writhing on the ground while his…. his eyes burned out. Every time I close my eyes, I hear him screaming. And I should, because that’s the price I have to pay. But I still am so damn mad, too, I still --”

“You want Chuck to pay, and so do I,” Cas says. “But I don’t know that we’ll ever get the chance now, with him out of the picture.”

“I hope we do. For Jack, I hope we see him again.”

They stand there for a long while, even when the night air begins to chill and Sam starts to shiver a little. Finally, Cas inclines his head towards the door. “You’re beginning to get a chill, Sam. It’s time we go back in. We can’t run forever.”

No, they really couldn’t. And that, Sam supposes, was fine.

“And just to make it clear,” The edges of Cas’s lips twitch just slightly. “I already forgive you, Sam. And in time, you need to learn to forgive yourself, too. I want that for you, and so would Jack.”

Sam stares in awe as the angel walks ahead of him.

He doesn’t know if he can forgive himself, not right now, but if Cas could… well, it was a start.

#spn #supernatural #sastiel #samcas #samjack #casjack #sam winchester #jack kline #castiel #sastiel dads #15.01

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shirtlesssammy · 4 years

Text

15x18: Despair

Then:

The entire fandom preparing for this episode

Now:

We literally start off right where we left off last week. Jack is a ticking time bomb. Sam hauls his nephew/son into the war room. Team Free Will freak out and try to come up with a plan. Jack wants to get far away from them. “Don’t let me hurt you.” AGGHH. We’re fine. It’s only 2 minutes into the episode, WE’RE FINE. Dean insists that they’re not giving up on him, and we love a good 180.

Billie pops up and tells them all that she can’t stop what’s happening to Jack, but she can help.

She sends him to the Empty where he promptly explodes.

Billie explains to the trio that the Empty was the only place/entity that could absorb that kind of power. Jack could survive --and the Empty could survive, but it won’t be happy. Billie points out that the Empty will want her, but can’t get to Earth without being summoned (coolcoolcoolcoolcoolcoolcoolcool).

Billie wants God’s book back from Sam. Sam Fucking Winchester confronts Billie about her end game plans of restoring order --and sending all of them back to their death. Billie tells Sam that if they want Jack back, he’ll give her the book.

JACK’S ALIVE!

Petty, petty, sullen Sam brings Billie the book, but throws it on the table instead of handing it to her, and we love him and his insolent little heart.

She grabs the book and starts to open it. Cas wonders what she’s doing.

She tells them that God’s book has a new ending. Dean’s done and wants Jack back.

Meanwhile, the Empty recorpealizes and is D O N E. She drags Jack to her and just as she’s about to HURT HIM, he disappears.

He’s home, but Billie claims him. Dean doesn’t like that idea so he grabs Death’s scythe before she can ditch the bunker with the kid. He slices her arm and she sends him flying. Billie disappears without the book, her scythe, or Jack.

Later, the Brothers Winchester take a moment in the library. Dean apologizes for pulling a gun on Sam.

(Listen, if we’re going full Bicon clown with Dean these next couple of weeks, this shot reminds me SO MUCH of the shot of James Dean from Giant.)

He also breaks down that Chuck is probably now all powerful, they’re on Billie’s hit list, Jack’s powerless, and Michael’s in the wind. They toast to their impossible odds.

*Charlie and her cute GF Alert*

Stevie, the cutie from episode 3 is making perfect scrambled eggs for Charlie, and I’m dying inside. Charlie suggests a hunter’s date, and they smile and ARE CUTE, and I’m dying inside. The eggs are perfect, but this story isn't. Stevie just poofs away before Charlie’s eyes.

Cut to Dean and Sam checking out Charlie’s place to piece together what happened. Charlie tells the brothers that she didn’t see or feel anything before Stevie disappeared.

Outside, Cas waits with Jack. Cas asks how Jack is doing.

Jack feels “strange”. He doesn’t know how to feel now that he’s not needed for the big plan. Cas assures him that he wasn’t there to get absolution from the Winchesters. “We don’t care about you because you’re useful or you fit into some grand design. We care about you because you’re you.” BRB CRYING.

Jack is crying, I’m crying, and the world is crumbling. Jack is scared, and Cas, gripping his son’s shoulder, tells him that he’s scared too.

Inside, the brothers tell Charlie that they think that Billie’s killing people that shouldn’t be on Earth. Charlie gets upset and admits that she promised herself that she wouldn’t do “the love thing” again. Sam gets a call from Bobby. More people are disappearing. Dean points out that no one is safe.

Sam instantly thinks of Eileen AND WE HAVE EMOTIONS. They take off to find Eileen.

Sam texts Eileen as they drive, but doesn’t tell her what’s up. Sam watches the dots...until they disappear. Hahahahahahah, NOPE.

They get to Eileen’s place and find her purse and phone on the sidewalk.

She’s gone. “If I let myself go there, I’ll lose my mind.” AND WE’RE RIGHT THERE WITH YOU SAMMY.

Sam activates action mode. He tells the others that they need to protect the other hunters from Alt World. Dean tells Sam that he should do this, but he’s going to make Billie pay. “I’ll go with you, Dean,” Cas volunteers. OF COURSE.

We jump to a close up on Donna and her fabulous D-TRAIN license plate. Readers, I love her. She talks to Sam over the phone. She’s found a silo they can ward up and hide out in while Dean and Cas try to take out Billie. When Sam hangs up, he notices that Jack’s looking unrooted and gives him a job to do. Jack “has to drive” so that Sam can do work. Jack scooches over to the driver’s seat, ready to do something at last. Readers, I love Sam.

Dean and Cas arrive at the bunker and make plans to barge into Billie’s library. Dean plans to trash the place like a particularly unruly raccoon who breaks into a kitchen, until Billie arrives to stop them. He grabs Death’s scythe and they’re off.

When Sam and Jack arrive at the silo, Donna tells Sam that she’s there for him - whatever he needs.

The hunter network is on high alert, and Bobby’s got his AU crew holed away in the silo already. Charlie pulls up, transformed from her sunset bright t-shirt into apocalypse world Charlie again.

Sam joins the crew in the warehouse and reconnects with Bobby, who immediately informs him that Sam’s the boss of the operation. When Bobby told the hunters that Sam wanted them to head to the silo, “they came running, no hesitation.” ….Excuse me, I have something in my eye. They’ve warded the whole silo with every warding they can throw at it, and Sam’s using one of Rowena’s spells (EXCUSE ME, I HAVE SOMETHING IN MY EYE) to bolster the strength of the sigils.

Jack and Donna are painting sigils together, when Jack notices a plant. She recommends pulling it to protect the warding, but when Jack extends his hand it withers and dies.

Dean and Cas creep into the library, where Billie stands waiting for them. Dean tells her that they’re after her because she’s been killing off his friends. Her only reply is, “Interesting.”

Dean jabs Billie in her wounded shoulder, and the pain is high enough that Dean can get the upper hand. She holds the scythe at bay with just her hand, and Dean orders her to call off the hits. Billie laughs right in his face. She’s not killing anyone! Dean’s little papercut to her shoulder is enough to kill her, so her only plan at this point is to kill herself a Winchester and go out in a blaze of vengeance.

Sam powers up the warding in the silo, ready to defend against Billie. Meanwhile, Billie thinks Chuck’s the likely one who’s been disappearing people. Quickly enough, a little girl is the first to disappear. As her family breaks down into full freak-out mode, all the hunters hiding out in the silo flash away. ALL OF THEM.

Hey, if I have to suffer, you have to suffer.

Sam, Jack, and Donna can only watch this with horror and then Donna looks down at her hands. She smokes out too. NOOOOOOOOOO!

Billie power-smacks Dean across the room. It’s vengeance time! As much as I don’t want Those Two Idiots™ to die, it is lovely to see Billie storm around in battle-Death mode.

Dean and Cas race into the bunker without a plan, Billie in pursuit. It’s only moments before Dean is buckling. As he collapses, we reveal Billie on the balcony. I do love how this is framed!

She’s clutching Dean’s heart in her grip and pursues them through the bunker. “I’ve got you,” Cas tells Dean as he supports him. HELP, I’ve been murdered by emotion!

Cas directs them to the dungeon, grabs Dean’s pocket knife from his back pocket (I’m FINE, btw), and slices his hand. Quickly, he wards the door with a sigil, and Dean recovers instantly.

That is, he recovers physically. Emotionally, he is in ROUGH SHAPE. While Billie pounds away at the sigil, Dean realizes that they’re trapped. He blames himself - he was angry and needed something to kill and that’s ALL HE KNOWS HOW TO DO. f r o w n y f a c e

Dean’s in a pretty bad headspace. He thinks Billie’s going to break in and kill Cas, then himself, and then EVERYBODY ELSE. He apologizes, while Cas puts his strategic commander-of-garrisons brain to work. There is ONE thing that Billie’s afraid of.

Readers, it was at this point that Boris and I were shouting our usual gleeful shit at the TV. Things like, “Lay one on him, Cas, and the Empty can come!” And then CAS SAYS, “I made a deal.”

“Kiss ‘im,” I murmur while wondering WHAAAAAAT IS HAPPENING when Cas brings up the “moment of true happiness” requirement. At this point, I’m thinking they’re in the dungeon and it’s full of spellwork supplies probably. So, like, I guess they’ll light some quick candles and summon the Empty?

We fall silent as Cas starts talking about FEELINGS. “The one thing I want, it’s something I know I can’t have.” He says this RIGHT TO DEAN’S FACE. RIGHT IN OUR FACES. “Happiness isn’t in the having. It’s in just being. It’s in just saying it.”

We stop breathing.

And then Cas murders us forever when he shifts to talking about Dean. He knows Dean sees himself as a killer, a “blunt instrument.” But Cas sees him differently, and his way is true: Dean cares more than anyone Cas has ever met. He’s powered by love and not anger. “You’re the most caring man on Earth. You are the most selfless, loving human being I will ever know. Ever since we met. Ever since I pulled you outta Hell, knowing you has changed me. Because you cared, I cared. I cared about you. I cared about Sam. I cared about Jack. I cared about the whole world because of you. You changed me, Dean.”

Cas is crying and we are murdered dead in our beds by this show.

Dean thinks it sounds like goodbye. “That’s because it is,” Cas tells him. And then he follows up with one last thing. “I love you.”

And...it’s there. The love we’ve seen in his eyes for eleven seasons is there, out loud, and centered on Dean. We joke a lot at ShirtlessSammy about the need to just KISS ALREADY but this flayed us in the way a kiss could never do. It heightens everything. Castiel’s care for Dean, his loyalty and friendship now have a new layer - that of textual, unrequited love. We’ve obviously been personally clinging to the destiel train car for quite some time, but laying out Castiel’s feelings and saying it’s enough for him to acknowledge them out loud is SO POWERFUL. As a love story, it’s tragic beauty. As a personal coming out story, it’s just BEAUTY.

For HARD TO PROCESS Science:

With this dropped between them, Dean can read the writing on the wall. “Don’t do this, Cas,” he begs. Immediately, gooey sounds begin to squish out from the brick wall behind Dean.

The empty swirls in, and Billie breaks through the door at last. Cas grasps Dean by the shoulder. “Goodbye, Dean,” he says, hurling him away from the twin threats.

In an instant, the Empty advances, swallowing Cas and Billie and retreating back into the wall without so much as a howdy. (Please join me for a displeased hiss at Billie’s apparent demise.)

Sam and Jack emerge from the silo, shocked. Sam tries calling Dean, while Jack looks around. Jack wonders if it was just the people in the silo who disappeared.

The camera POV pans out to abandoned playground equipment, still-spinning bicycle wheels, and cars left behind on the road. It’s the end of the world, and suddenly the world feels too big. Too lonely.

We cut to Dean. He’s on the floor in the same place Castiel threw him. His phone rings. It’s Sam. Dean stares at it, before dropping it to the floor. He pulls himself inward, and the episode ends on the sounds of choked sobbing.

Boris and I are monsters, as WE end the episode entirely too jubilant for words. Here’s to being right! Readers, while Boris can’t fully hope for a happy ending (gotta protect that heart), Natasha has zero doubts. We’re getting them back, damn it! And love’s gonna light the way.

Never Gonna Quote Me Away (From You!):

I don’t wanna hurt you. Don’t let me hurt you.

To somehow

I wanted to make things right. And now I don’t know why I’m here

Let’s go reap a reaper

I brought a bucket

I guess this is the part where I say, “Hello, boys”

It’s you, Dean. It’s always been you. Death defying. Rule breaking. You are everything I live to set right. To put down. To tame. You are human disorder incarnate

You think that hate and anger - that’s what drives you. It’s not. Everyone who knows you sees it. Everything you have ever done - the good and the bad - you have done for love.

Want to read more? Check out our Recap Archive!

#spn spoilers #spn recap #spn 15x18 #despair #dean winchester #sam winchester #castiel #cas #jack kline #charlie #bobby singer #donna hanscum #billie #the empty #destiel #eileen leahy #supernatural season 15

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