i think i have aspd or traits . but i dont wanna go to a psych and be like " btw here are my symptoms ive never told u about before , have fun ! ( insert the entire ASPD criteria here ) . sorry " because that makes me look bad & i appear the opposite ( passive , fearful , not aggressive ) , & dont want to appear as a threat and i most definitely dont want them to think im manipulating them when im not ( like for example when im just telling them my symptoms regarding other conditions ) . and i dont want to admit to committing crimes incase they report me or i have to go through a security clearance for job reasons and they go thru my stuff . anyways as far as anyones concerned i seem nice but weird but not the type of person to have those kinds of symptoms , and i want it to keep my Good Girl(tm) image . but also . i dont want to start having legal issues , become dependent on substances , pursue any illegal occupation , etc since it would suck to get caught and im only 21 so i keep trying my best to avoid it everytime i almost continue with it , but i need help bad lol . any idea of what i should or can do ? anything helps
okay real talk but literally do exactly the opposite of everything ur doing and also get out of ur own head and stop overanalyzing every thought u have to find justifications for not doing the very simple basic first step towards what u know is the right thing to do but just dont want to because being vulnerable feels yucky and ur scared
i say this with genuine compassion and no judgement because i *absolutely* did and still sometimes do the same thing but unfortunately the only way to get urself out of that cycle is to get over urself and touch grass (encouragingly) so that u just Do The Thing u know u need to do
being open and honest with a therapist about ur thoughts and feelings is the only way to get any actual positive growth or help out of it. u cant fix what u dont talk about and keeping it all to urself will only drive u more and more insane. staying cooped up inside ur own mind without telling other ppl what ur thinking out loud creates a feedback loop of crazy. u gotta hear urself talk to another person sometimes to actually really *hear* urself, u know? ur brain is where the crazy is and u cant stay there alone and expect it to work out and get better. u have to talk it out and be confronted and challenged with other viewpoints to realize where urs are disordered
if u look for reasons not to do something u will absolutely find them, and while i could offer rebuttels to a lot of ur concerns, things like how ur medical records and psych details are not that detailed. u doing illegal behavior like stealing or doing drugs is not something that gets listed on those and falls under patient confidentiality. the only thing that gets documented is the official diagnoses name which most therapists are going to be very reluctant to hardline diagnose someone with aspd (and even then it only gets logged with that practice and submitted to ur insurance only if ur seeking care like meds or hospital stays or get incarcerated. otherwise, if u dont tell someone "i saw dr.x at yclinic from 2019-2022, then they have no way of knowing or finding out what that dr wrote on their internal records/notes. there is no centralized database of "medical history" outside of ur insurance company and specific practices internal networks) individual symptoms like "illegal activity" do not get listed and unless ur planning on enrolling in the military or working for the feds no job is looking more deeply than that into ur history unless u personally volunteer it. what comes up when specific companies do background checks with a medical history is ur insurance records. ur insurance only knows what gets submitted to them specifically, if ur therapist doesnt file paperwork with ur insurance to list aspd as a diagnosis they are looking for ur insurance to pay them to treat u for specifically (instead of more generalized things like "depression" "anxiety" or just "mental health care" ect, which they have to get ur permission to do) then there's no paper trail of what u two talk about in that office
or how ur "good girl" image is legitimately worthless garbage and will grant u absolutely nothing in life and clinging to it in the false hope that other ppls perceptions of u will change who u actually are and make u happy is only gonna lead u to looking at ur shitty unhappy life in 5 years and being filled with nothing but regret and anger and wanting to kill urself
or that while u cant know or control how ur therapist sees u or reacts to the things u share with them, u can control who they are. if u fuck up with this therapist or it takes a turn u dont like or they start treating u badly, u can very much just get another one. u can request a different person at the same clinic for any reaosn or u could switch clinics entirely. most insurance in the us is taken by more than 1 provider in an area and there are almost always multiple practices that take the local insurance. and even then, if u wanna drive 45mins to see a therapist a town over cause u burned a bridge with this one u can do that. ur not beholden to a single person, u can get dozens and dozens of opinions. ive had over 15 different therapists in my life. if u fuck up with one u can always get another
but all those rebuttals dont really matter because if u want to, i have no doubt u could find counter points to all those points. i know i could if i tried. so really it just comes down to the simple question of are u going to keep standing in ur own way or are u going to cut the bullshit and take it seriously and do the hard thing because u know its what u need to do? ur young still, uve got so much time, dont waste more of it waiting for the perfect solution or situation because it will never exist. do it now, do it messy, do it scared, fuck it up and get it wrong a bunch, and then try again and again until it works
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See yourself being perceived by others in this light bc you already are such a remarkable beauty to witness
Pov : everyone who sees you says this about your looks
"Omg you're drop dead GORGEOUS 😍 "
"HOW are you so pretty 😭😭 what's your secret"
" you're literally the prettiest girl I've ever seen I'm not even kidding"
"Your eyes are so mesmerizing wow😍 ..I'm in love"
"U have the most perfect lips"
"Ur eyebrows are always on fleek"
"I love how long and thick ur eyelashes are"
"You're so beautiful I'm obsessed"
"Ur skin is literally FLAWLESS"
"I'm convinced you're a real life goddess"
"I looove ur hair it looks so healthy and soft and luscious "
"How are u even real? U look so ethereal and out of this world!"
"Ur beauty has me daydreaming and writing poems"
"Ur beauty alone leaves an unforgettable mark on everyone"
"I can't fathom how pretty you are"
"Everything about u is perfect, like youre unbelievably stunning"
"What's it like being the most beautiful girl in the world?😍"
"U have this kind of beauty thats so captivating, haunting and addictive to look at"
"I love ur stylee u always look so chic"
"You're such an eye-candy I could look at you forever"
"Ur face is literally my desired face, ur beauty is the standard"
"Girl I would kill to look like u"
"Ur beauty leaves me speechless everytime, how do u have that effect?"
"I don't think anyone who looks at u can resist falling in love w you"
"Has anyone ever told you how powerful your beauty is? Like it's dangerous how beautiful u are"
"Do you model? U literally have the body and looks for it"
"I love ur fashion sense , u give off IT girl vibes"
"Stop looking at me with those siren eyes 🫠"
Pov : people say this behind your back
"She's def the kind of girl who steals all the attention with her beauty when she walks into a room"
"Y/N had a huge glow up, she keeps getting prettier everytime I see her"
"She looks so stunning in pictures but wait till u see her irl its even better"
"I genuinely think she's the prettiest girl in existence"
"There's something about her beauty thats so hypnotic it sticks in ur mind"
"My heart starts beating so fast when she looks at me. Her beauty makes me nervous"
"Have you seen Y/N? she's the prettiest around here"
"She has that kind of beauty that everyone wanna copy"
"She's naturally beautiful like she doesn't even try"
💌💌💌
Let me know if u want more like this 💫
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thoughts on shifting + manifesting with ease. (as someone who's shifted many times, alongside manifesting)
coming back to this side of tumblr after spending years away from it has made me realized how many do you are truly the problem, it might sound kinda harsh but really. so many of you ask the same questions over and over again.. "but HOW do i do it?" "how do i shift" "how do i manifest" JUST DO IT. stop looking for signs, stop looking for methods or "cheat codes". just do it man.
your mind is so powerful and it actually kinda irritates me how many of you doubt it, just because it "seems to easy". you don't understand how you've been manipulated by society to not see your power. how have you been on loa social media, shifting social media, for soooo long — yet still don't see it?? let me tell you..
the moment i got off social media, the moment i took time to erase everything in my head and stop overthinking everything, was the moment everything came to me. i already had it, i just needed to stop telling myself i didn't.
it took me less than two weeks to get used to convincing myself i had everything i wanted, i shifted to my desired realities, and everything worked out in my favour. AFFIRMING IS ALL YOU NEED. I AM YELLING AT YOU. JUST AFFIRM.
really, please, affirm. the routine is so simple.
1. any bad thought is instantly turned positive.
ex: "i really want her waist"
to
"am i stupid ... i have her waist.. tbh mine even looks a little better.. am i crazy?? like actually? this must be a glitch or something cause my waist is practically identical to hers.. i literally love my waist"
exaggerate, say what you need to say to erase the negativity.
2. it's yours, so act like it..
ex: talk about ur DR normally. it's your reality, not a fantasy land you made up in a dream. ITS REAL. it's a reality. for example, i'd watch videos of my s/o in this reality, and speak about our lives in my dr. "i can't wait to see __ tonight... god i love __, it's so nice hanging out with them everyday.. wow they look so pretty in this video — i'm so lucky their mine". it's natural, they're yours aren't they? exactly, so act like it.. this is used the exact same way when manifesting..
you see someone with something you want? thinking of something you wanna do? something you wanna be? ... it's urs... so can you act like it?? like whyre u feeling sad someone else got a job promotion 😹😹 you literally got a better one ...
3. that's literally it
you don't need a fancy method (although it can give u some peace of mind.. let's be real, a lot of methods set y'all back and make you overwhelmed, blocking ur beliefs and making everything seem harder). you literally just need to live. tell yourself it's done, over and over again. nothing matters. it's done, it's yours, you have it, you're happy and fulfilled. other peoples sucess should really mean nothing to you negatively. it shouldn't make you stressed, shouldn't make you feel behind.. why would it when you have everything, you can do everything, go anywhere, and you can be anything.
it'll seem like manifesting blogs and shifting blogs just repeat the same things.. which is true, they do, because i'm telling you there's nothing more to it than what you've already read. it is that easy. all it takes is your mind. decide, and tell yourself.
as i said before, it took me barely anytime to switch my mindset once i actually started focusing on myself, my journey and not every body else's results. repeating stuff to yourself WORKS. repeating is literally ALL i did. choose what i want, told myself it's mine in any way i could describe it. and there, it's mine. ive shifted to many different realities, along side gaining a better life in this one after years of convincing myself there was nothing for me. if i can break out of the cycle, trust me you can too. i cannot describe how desperate i was at the beginning, how long i took in false info and wasted time on methods all while doubting every single thing.
so why don't you believe it? you'll sit there and tell yourself over and over again that you're ugly, or broke, or friendless... but you won't tell urself that you've shifted? that you have your dream body...? girl okay i guess....
once you realize nothing besides your mind truly matters, is when you'll be free with yourself. circumstances don't matter, past feelings don't matter, doubts don't matter, your mind is all you need.
yes this is just loa explained longer, that's the point of the post because some of u still can't get it in ur heads
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up the oranges? | max verstappen
face claim: none ᡣ𐭩
request: here !
───────── ౨ৎ ─────────
👤 ybfngram, landonorris, mclaren
liked by ybfngram, landonorris and 83,928 others
y/nstagram bestie won paddock passes to mclaren garage and was gracious enough to let little noob me tag along! up the oranges or whatever she said 🧡
ygfngram it's papaya babe... but thank u for letting me rant about all things f1!! (and thank u for the lando pic i'm gonna be so insufferable from now on)
↳ y/nstagram wdym from now on?? but i enjoyed it! 🫶
user1 y/n and f1?? the crossover we never knew we needed
user2 please say you vlogged it!!
↳ y/nstagram ofc i did 🫶 coming next week!!
landonorris was lovely to meet you guys! :)
♥️ y/nstagram, ybfngram
mclaren if y/n says it's up the oranges, it's up the oranges... you're welcome back anytime 🧡
↳ y/nstagram sorry best friends.. up the papayas! 🧡
👤 landonorris, oscarpiastri, mclaren, maxverstappen1
liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri and 103,496 others
y/nstagram new vlog out now! the orange (😉) boys explain f1 to me, we take a look around the mclaren garages and a certain world champion sneaks in! link in bio 🧡
landonorris for someone who's never seen an f1 race, you picked it up pretty well!
↳ ybfngram not for lack of trying, she never wants to join my race nights 💔
↳ y/nstagram next time baby! girls night ❤️
redbullracing we think she'd look better in blue 👀
↳ maxverstappen1 agreed
↳user2 ARIANA? what are you doing here
mclaren back 🤺 redbull 🤺 back!
👤 y/nstagram
liked by landonorris, y/nstagram and 385,038 others
mclaren we must say, orange suits you y/n 🧡
y/nstagram thank you for having me back mclaren! the oranges are safe and sound in my kitchen 🫡
↳ user1 oranges??
↳ y/nstagram when i arrived, they had a bowl of oranges waiting for me... humiliating babes...
landonorris the highlight was her peeling oranges for oscar and patting his head like a baby
↳ oscarpiastri didn't see her peeling YOU oranges though 🤨
↳ y/nstagram that's ybfngram's job xx
↳ ybfngram i would have if SOMEONE would have invited me...
↳ y/nstagram you were literally on another continent grumpy pants
↳ mclaren next time we'll bring some oranges for you ybfngram 🧡
↳ ybfngram and that's why i'm a papaya girl for life 🧡
♥️ mclaren, landonorris
👤 ybfngram, y/nstagram
liked by maxverstappen1, y/nstagram and 593,957 others
redbullracing it's mr steal your girllll 🎶
mclaren ... y/n how could you do this to us
↳ y/nstagram MCLAREN ITS NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE.. you know i love you 🫶
↳ mclaren save it 💔
landonorris not you too 💔 ybfngram
↳ y/nstagram tbf i did have to physically wrestle the shirt onto her, dw she immediately went back to orange 🧡
↳ ybfngram lando sweetie... the papaya is in my veins... i was coerced...
↳ landonorris guess i'll have to bring you back to our side of the paddock 😉
maxverstappen1 i was right, she does look better in blue 💙
↳ user1 back of the line mr verstappen we were simping first
♥️ y/nstagram
↳ y/nstagram free red bulls for life and i'll back the blue
↳ mclaren wtf?
↳ maxverstappen1 consider it done
↳ christianhorner i don't remember agreeing to this max
👤 maxverstappen1, redbullracing
liked by maxverstappen1, redbullracing and 92,495 others
y/nstagram alexa play the dutch national anthem 💙
redbullracing our favourite song 💙
user1 did max draw that himself 😭
↳ maxverstappen1 y/n made it for me!
mclaren y'all are cute or whatever...
↳ y/nstagram still love you mclaren 🧡
scuderiaferrari we spot our charles, maybe red will suit you too y/n ❤️
↳ y/nstagram if you can get me a ferrari, i'll consider it xx
↳ scuderiaferrari ... let us make some phone calls
↳ maxverstappen1 i will burn it to the ground.
↳ user1 ur so real for that max, fight for your red bull girl!
♥️ maxverstappen1
user2 y/n having all these f1 teams wrapped around her finger... what she deserves
👤 maxverstappen1, schecoperez, redbullracing
liked by maxverstappen1, redbullracing and 132,842 others
y/nstagram back at it again with another f1 vid! this time i convinced the red bull gang to do a mukbang with me before mr MV1 zoomed off to win another race! 🫶 link in bio 💙
user1 bro max was so whipped in this video...
↳ user2 TRULY! she had him giggling and kicking his feet the entire vid
user3 how does it feel to watch y/n snatch ur man danielricciardo
↳ danielricciardo he used to giggle and tuck his hair behind his ears like that with me 💔 come home max, the kids miss you x
↳ maxverstappen1 fuck them kids
redbullracing poor checo thirdwheeling again...
↳ schecoperez to be honest i checked out halfway through
↳ y/nstagram nooo checo my king im sorry 💔 next time it will be just us two 💙
↳ maxverstappen1 not if i have anything to do with it
user4 WHIPPED
♥️ maxverstappen1
mclaren is this what it feels like to be cheated on? 💔
↳ y/nstagram my hearts big enough for both orange and blue 🧡💙
liked by maxverstappen1, y/nstagram and 963,956 others
redbullracing yo bro who got you smiling like that...
user1 red bull soft launching their drivers relationship?? admin on a scale of 1 to 10 how fired are you
↳ redbullracing i am declining all of christians calls...
↳ christianhorner see you at work monday.
↳ redbullracing oh its so over
maxverstappen1 can't believe red bull admin beat us to it y/nstagram 💔
↳ y/nstagram aaand i guess that was the hard launch
👤 maxverstappen1
liked by maxverstappen1, ybfngram and 150,385 others
y/nstagram so here's my bf(?) i guess... thanks redbullracing
danielricciardo stealing the second image thanks!
↳ y/nstagram 🫡
maxverstappen1 you couldn't have made it cute
↳ y/nstagram just showing your true personality babe x
maxverstappen1 love you or whatever 🙄
♥️ y/nstagram
user1 she's so real for these pics
redbullracing if it makes you feel better i did nearly lose my job
↳ user1 we got your back admin ❤️
user2 the first pic should be framed and hung in the louvre
♥️ y/nstagram, maxverstappen1
user3 why the ? by bf ???
↳ y/nstagram we never really made it official?? red bull did it for us i guess hahaha
↳ maxverstappen1 oh make no mistake, you're mine ❤️
♥️ redbullracing, y/nstagram
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