#anon i have you to thank for getting me back into spn fic <3 i've been rereading some of these over the past few days

[preseriesdean]

if you don’t mind me asking, could you share some of your favorite fanfics or authors? thanks ❤️

oh hi hello!! yes of course!! i actually haven't read any spn fic in a while but i have spent a lot of time organizing my bookmarks. i'm going to assume that you meant samdean fic but i'll add a few non-samdean ones at the end.

authors!

@zmediaoutlet (deadlybride on ao3)

candle_beck (ao3)

@goshen-applecrumbledore (ao3)

whereupon (livejournal)

Linden (ao3)

sevenfists (ao3)

there are so many more great authors but these came to mind :)

fics!

i am going to list my forever-favorites first - the ones i would recommend to anyone and everyone, screaming-from-the-rooftops kind of love - and then many many more under the cut.

beloved by urchinesque (2016, 1.9k, NR, warning: death) It might be the gentlest thing that's ever happened to them.

in my opinion everyone should read this once. it's quick. they die. it's-- happy, somehow. beautiful. i think about it all the time.

Last Day on Earth by candle_beck (2009, 10.8k, E) A list of things to do if you only have one day to live, presented in inconvenient non-list form.

last year my best friend and i were pondering which fic felt quintessential to samdean for us and somehow settled on this one. i still agree with the choice.

Odysseus, American by coyotesuspect (2010, 10k, M) Dean finds Peter O'Toole's recording of the Odyssey in a bin marked “Audio" in Casa Grande's only used bookstore. The place smells like cigarette smoke and old books, and it reminds him of Sam. Stanford era.

my favorite stanford era fic. i think it captures dean's loneliness and desperation beautifully.

A man with his insides out and his outsides off by britomart_is (2016, 5.3k, E, time travel, underage) They say there are only two stories in the world: man goes on a journey, and stranger comes to town.

another fic i want everyone to read. it's so short and feels like a novel. sam is messed up and dean is in love and everything is miserable.

Breathing Hard by whereupon (2009, 9k, E) The day Dean figures it out.

this is so simple and yet-- everything to me. i can't think about dinosaurs without thinking about this fic, which doesn't tell you much, but you'll see. sometimes this is really all you need.

The Last Outpost of All That Is by gekizetsu (2008, 59k, E) The world ends while they’re asleep.

this fic has stayed with me my whole life. i thought about it even during my years away from spn and fandom entirely. they're alone and you don't know why and they build their life together and you end up wondering, is this hell or heaven? whenever i come across a screenshot of the last couple of paragraphs i want to cry.

see things so much clearer by deadlybride (2020, 11.7k, E) Sam's been acting oddly. Dean learns how to use the history on an internet browser and finds out why.

this is a fic that hits the spot for me personally so well. another favorite preseries fic. i love the idea of sam using livejournal, and of dean finding out this way.

Stay The Distance by lazy_daze (2011, 24k, E) Sam is dependent on Dean's touch and closeness after the wall falls - Dean's presence reminds him of why he chose to wake up, and keeps the memories at bay, allowing Sam to function.

i love enmeshment, and i love that here it's literal. i love that they're just sort of fine with it.

more fics below!

in absolutely no particular order whatsover. please check the warnings and tags on these before reading!

Recall by De_Nugis (2012, 6.3k, E) Sam's having a hard time telling what's real and what isn't, especially when it comes to some voicemails from Dean.

Living in god's blind spot by applecrumbledore (2022, 25k, E) Of all the situations Dean didn’t need his dad to see him in, ‘getting off to being pushed around by a guy’ was in the top three. And ‘a guy’ was a massive glossing-over of reality. Any guy—any other guy—would be bad enough, but Sam was fucking cataclysmic.

Almost At Home by balefully (2008, 24.3k, E) Sam graduates from high school in early June in rural Tennessee. He and Dean start the summer with an all-nighter of celebration; the day after, while both fight hangovers, John calls to assign them their first hunt by themselves.

they said it was the fall of man by jukeboxhound (2016, 7.4k, M) Sam gets his soul back on a Monday.

When I Fall Asleep It Is Your Eyes That Close by britomart_is (2009, 1.9k, E) Post-Season Two. Sam is alive. Dean is happy.

Life As We Know It by sevenfists (2007, 13.7k, M, curtain fic) On the morning that Sam woke up, Dean ran five red lights on the way to the hospital, his half-empty coffee cup sloshing in the holder.

tied up like two ships by orphan_account (2014, 3.1k, E) Dean liked to hold hands.

Gospel Truth by Cerberuss (2020, 15.2k, E, case fic) ‘DOES YOUR BROTHER KNOW THAT YOU WANT HIM?’ Individually placed letters, bold and tinged brown with the weather. Sam can’t look away and he prays, dream dream dream.

Buy You A Mockingbird by candle_beck (2011, 10.3k, M, underage, outsider pov) A genuine horror story.

because you want to die for love by hathfrozen (2021, 27.3k, E) Sam and Dean settle into their Heaven—and into each other, too.

the constant vow by deadlybride (2022, 119k, E, fem dean-ish) They've just finished up a pretty standard job and are killing time in snowy Wisconsin when Dean wakes up no longer looking like Dean. That's just the start of their problems.

This Fortress Made of Us by mickeym (2009, 10.8k, E) Sam really didn't do very well without his brother. Coda for Mystery Spot.

State of Love and Trust/As I Busted Down the Pretext by cormallen (2010, 2.9k, M) When you know exactly what your brother's thinking, there are some chances you just don't take.

Quiet with the Rain by Linden (2014, 5.3k, T) Dean can spot an undercover cop at thirty paces, a hooker at twenty, and rims that will match his baby's at ten. But the fact that his little brother is in love with him—that, he can't see worth a damn.

have a cigar by deadlybride (2020, 5.6k, E) What happened with Andy and Ansem unsettles Sam. Dean doesn't seem worried.

Heart Shaped Balloon by winsive (2022, 18.5k, E, underage) Sam and Dad are fighting. No surprise, but it's the weekend before Valentine's Day and Dean isn't missing out on the chance to bang a cheerleader just to console his bratty little brother. He does bring back a heart shaped balloon for him, though. It's not supposed to be cursed.

Bare by gracerene (2022, 2.2k, T) Of all the things Dean hasn't done before, Sam never expected something as innocuous as skinny dipping to be on the list.

Speechless by candle_beck (2008, 11.2k, T, case fic) Dean loses his voice and their rapport is only moderately impaired.

Like It Was Yesterday by nomelon (2014, 4.9k, T, fem dean, amnesia) Sam can't remember a time when Dean wasn't there. Dean is always with him. Sam's whole life, there's never been anyone else.

Like a Ghost with Two Voices by Dyed_Red (2022, 46k, E) To cure Dean from the Mark of Cain, Sam has to let Dean, in all his demonic glory, possess him for 28 days. It goes about as well as expected.

Breathe You In (Choke You Down) by orphan_account (2021, 5.9k, E, pwp) Dean really likes the way Sam smells.

lost in yesterday by margaryes (2023, 1k, NR, john pov) John hasn’t seen his youngest son in 18 months.

Unraveling by Linden (2017, 855 words, E) No, he’d said, the first time Sammy had tried to kiss him, sixteen and half-drunk and stupidly beautiful, even though he’d wanted so badly to say yes.

pack up the moon by deathdreamt (2021, 5.9k, T, pre-slash) Sam storms back out from their room, his backpack on and his duffel hanging off his shoulder and isn’t it kind of tragic that his whole life fits in two bags. He looks suddenly much younger than he is, eyes shining. John is back at his guns, whiskey at his elbow, and Dean can hardly believe how rapidly his life is cracking down the centre.

Yesterday, minnesota by applecrumbledore (2022, 30k, E, case fic) Any initial awkwardness filtered away over a hundred miles of highway as Sam thumbed through the missing witch’s diary again. Some people had secret coke habits or secret second wives, and some people had passionate, pitch black, no-kissing sex with a family member every four to six months and never talked about it. You had to find ways to cope.

All Heartless Spectres, Happiness by orphan_account (2021, 5.6k, E) Lisa Braeden receives an email with the subject line, "You Deserve to Know." It contains a single video file and nothing else. (soulless sam)

The Palm Oasis by fictionallemons (2022, 12.3k, E, underage) John strands Dean and Sam at a middle-of-nowhere motel while he investigates possible demon omens in Arizona. The place is nothing to write home about, but at least it has a pool. Dean resolves to think of this as a vacation for him and his studious little brother, but when their money runs out sooner than expected, he considers turning tricks at a nearby truck stop so he can feed Sam.

Other Brothers by homo_pink (2020, 7k, M, underage, outsider pov) A callow boy can go from infancy to someone’s lover in the space of two wildflower summers.

Leader of the Pack by astolat (2007, 14.9k, E) Teaching old dogs new tricks.

Underground Wires by eggnogged (2012, 15.8k, E, fem sam, underage) It’s hard enough being a teenage girl even without all the extra crap: they move around all the time, her family is as far removed from normal as it’s possible to get, and she’s in love with her older brother. Sam has no control on any of it, she’s just trying to stay afloat.

Multitude of Sins by Linden (2015, 4.4k, T, outsider pov) Every now and again, Jim Murphy would look up from his altar and find the Winchester boys at the back of his church.

Like Arrows in the Hands of a Warrior by ADeedWithoutaName (2018, 10.3k, E, underage, dub con-ish, john pov) John Winchester loves his boys, and would take a bullet for either of them. He knows that he's doing it right, the way he's raising them, the things he's teaching them. Not every problem, however, has an easy answer. Like what to do after an incubus case in which their target got his pollen all over both of John's sons.

You Can't Lose What You Never Had by nigeltde (2016, 5.6k, E) You can't spend what you ain't got, and you can't lose what you ain't never had.

Flagstaff by Linden (2014, 7.3k, T, pre-slash, john pov) John tracked Sam down in Flagstaff, four days after he got home to find him gone.

I'll take my chance on a beautiful stranger by fleshflutter (2007, 3.8k, M, outsider pov) If Chase were a better friend, he might try to end the game now, before Brendan loses even more money. But if Brendan is a dick at Stanford, it’s nothing compared to how he is on break.

Cupid's Got A Gun by geckoholic (2012, 13.5k, E, non-con) Fuck-or-die, set in early S4. But they've been fucking for years, so that shouldn't be a problem, right? Wrong. Ever since hell, Dean's in no hurry to get that show on the road again.

Someone Else's Blood by sevenfists (2006, 6.7k, E) The first time, of course, was an accident. (pretend dating)

How Many Floors to Realize by lazy_daze (2009, 26k, E, swesson) AU from the end of It's A Terrible Life, in which Zachariah decides to keep stringing them along a little while longer, because damn if they aren't somewhat entertaining, right?

Worthless cartography by applecrumbledore (2022, 15.6k, E) Dean didn’t know what finally made him go for it. The djinn’s dream was a catalyst, but the call was coming from inside the house, and he’d been letting it ring for a very, very long time. (They get one night together right before Sam is taken to Cold Oak. Dean has to deal with that.)

The Space Between Sense and Memory by orphan_account (2021, 4.8k, T) There are a hundred unwritten rules on all the acceptable ways brothers should touch each other. There are hardly any ways at all to break them. Or; five times they follow the rules and one time they don’t.

Ions in the Ether by nigeltde (2019, 10.9k, E, case fic) When was the last time you trusted happy.

Crossed Wires by rivkat (2015, 10.9k, E) Dean thinks Sam is dead.

Crown and Anchor Me (or let me sail away) by Sena (2010, 23.7k, E, underage) Sam Winchester is fifteen years old, at yet another new high school in yet another state, he doesn't get along with his distant, distracted father, he's figuring out that he likes guys just as much as he likes girls, his clothes never fit and his limbs ache at the joint ever since his growth spurt started, he has to study for the PSAT and, oh yeah, he's a little bit in love with his brother, Dean, who's taken a break from hunting monsters to work at a local garage for minimum wage.

Wear Him Lika a Habit by sevenfists (2008, 2.2k, M) Their first kiss isn't an accident. It's anticipated well in advance, discussed for weeks, argued over, second-guessed.

Amor Prohibido by phoenixflight (2020, 3k, M, underage) They spent the spring of Sam's sophomore year living in a shitty apartment south of San Antonio. Every Friday night the clearest channel played three hour marathons of a Spanish soap called La Casa del Corazón. There was a mutually understood truce about watching it, because the alternatives were infomercials or creepy kids’ cartoons that futzed into static every fifteen seconds.

Open Road by Mollyamory (2010, 2k, T) Sam's old enough to know what's good for him.

It's the Blueprint of Your Life by queenklu (2011, 38.4k, time travel) Sam jerks awake in the middle of the night and everything goes to hell. Well, not literally, though Dean is staring down the barrel of less than a year before his deal comes due. In the midst of dealing (or not dealing) with his impending death, a killer ghost ship, and Bela showing up out of the blue, Dean also has to figure out what’s going on in Sam’s head to make him so twitchy, why he’s suddenly breezing through this case while writing endless notes in a notebook he won’t let Dean see.

North of Wednesday by Mollyamory (2008, 3.5k, G) Sam's behind the wheel before he realizes he doesn't have the keys. Coda to Mystery Spot.

non-wincest fic.

dean/omc. We Drank a Thousand Times by glorious_spoon (2010, 43k, M, warning: death) They meet in a bar fight in North Carolina when Dean is nineteen, broke, and desperate, then again when a hunt brings the Winchesters into town a few years later. Neither one of them ever puts a name to it but every once in a while, through the years, Dean finds his way back.

dean/cas: terror & desire intertwined by rupertgayes (2022, 39k, M) Faced with Castiel suffering a fate worse than death, Dean makes the decision to let Cas use his body as a temporary vessel. All things considered, Dean thinks, it could have gone worse.

gen, sam&dean: what lasts by deadlybride (2021, 17.2k, M) Not long after they move into the bunker, Dean loses a leg. Most of a leg. After the hospital, Sam brings him home, and they figure out how to live with what remains.

gen, dean-centric: To Repair Broken Men by procrastin8or951 (2015, 3.1k, T) Dad and Sam keep fighting. Dean can't fix his family, so he fixes things around the crappy apartment they are staying in.

dean/michael: our hour came round at last by orphan_account (2015, 1.8k, NR, pwp) "I want to be inside you," says Michael, low and velvet and hungry and that really shouldn't turn Dean on but it does.

dean/lucifer, dean/cas: exploratory by sp8ce (2022, 4.9k, E, non-con) One night, Castiel proposes he and Dean have sex. Except it's a little more complicated than that.

dean/cas: for a healthy heart by Askance (2013, 2.4k, T) A strange black box appears in Castiel's bedroom one afternoon.

gen, sam&dean: charmer & gentle by Askance (2015, 3.7k, G, outsider pov) The afternoon girl calls them Big and Tall, the strangers who come in late every now and then, buying this or that. The night girl doesn't think those names fit quite right.

dean/cas, past sam/dean: whose wings, though tattered, shall carry me home by fleshflutter (2009, 2.2k, T) There is a breeze moving across the field. It stirs the long grass in lapping waves like the sea. Castiel runs his fingertips through it and remembers flying.

[artsyunderstudy]

20 questions for fic writers!

Thank you @bazzybelle and @aroace-genderfluid-sheep for tagging me in this game!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Currently 29, but there's a chunk of them where I'm just the artist and not the author, so 23 actual stories written by me.

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

522,789 words. That's honestly surprising since I've only really written a handful of longer fics! Tho also some of that word count isn't actually me.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

All Carry On these days. I wrote for SPN in the past, like seriously a decade ago. It's been a minute.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

These are all my SPN fics, even tho I do genuinely think my writing has improved drastically since those days, it was just a bigger fandom.

Blackbird Fly (163,191 words) Kudos: 3,368 

In Our Nature (62,200 words) Kudos: 2,086

To be Alone with You (6,248 words) Kudos: 1,664 

We Are What You Say (8,868 words) Kudos: 1,361

He Woke Me Up Again (7,642 words) Kudos: 1,121

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do! I really appreciate comments and I feel like it's one of my favorite things about writing, getting that active feedback and engagement, and so I want to engage in conversation about it and also make sure the commenter knows how much I appreciate it. And maybe provide additional context! Sometimes people's response to my writing is profound and unexpected and meaningful in ways I can't anticipate, and I love it, and I want to talk to them about it.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I don't really write angsty endings (just beginnings and middles and climaxes and maybe a bit of angsty denouement). I write a lot of imperfect endings tho, because I'm also allergic to tying things up in a neat little bow. What We Crave specifically doesn't have a happy ending but it does have a clearly hopeful one. I just stopped writing before everything was resolved basically, but you know those crazy kids figured it all out in the end. I could make the argument that there are angsty elements in a lot of my endings. Other Penny from The Mirrors that Hold Us comes to mind.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

The fic with the most unambiguously happy ending is probably ... oh god this is tough. Because actually like I said I write imperfect endings, and I can think of how every one of mine might not be perfect. Sixty Seconds has a very happy ending. But also eighth year hasn't happened yet so who knows what's in store. But WITHIN THE CONFINES OF THE FIC, its definitely happy I think ... I think. Or maybe it's Touch Starved, because they are in a happy committed relationship and Baz finally (finally) (finally) gets to *censored* Simon's rock hard *censored* until he can't *so fucking censored*

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not these days, I think this fandom is particularly kind. Or maybe I've just been lucky. I did get hate on fics back in my SPN days, not so much on AO3 but definitely in anon asks. Pretty much "you don't deserve all the attention you get" which okay, fair.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes. Emotional as fuck. We're not getting off to this smut, we're crying about it. I occasionally do write kinky stuff but its harder for me. Not because I don't want to, but I have to be in a particular mood and willing to let Jesus take the wheel for a bit and not overthink. (Yes you can thank Jesus specifically for my kinkiest of smuts.)

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Nope and I kinda doubt I ever will.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I'm aware of! Had art stolen before, tho.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

I don't think so.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not really, I've kinda dipped my toe into this pool but I'm a very independent creator in general and so I kinda veer away from it. I'm not good at group projects.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

I mean, it's obviously Snowbaz.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I have tried really hard to finish everything I start but I do have a few outstanding WIPS. Actually, one per fandom. In Our Nature will never be finished because its been a decade and I don't care for Destiel anymore, but A Mild Case of Madness still has hope. I'm just struggling to write anything right now. But I do still have a ton of momentum left on AMCOM. It just might take a really long time.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I think I write emotions and intimacy really well. I'm good making people feel those emotions. I also think I shine writing people navigating relationships and trauma.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I think I'm pretty meh at dialogue, I tend to enjoy writing people's emotions and actions more than their words and if I don't check myself I will sometimes put very minimal speaking into scenes. I also narrow in my focus when writing to interpersonal drama and trauma and therefore really struggle with big plotty stories, and im not good at setting up antagonists so the conflict tends to be smaller scale. Like I love stories with quests and some evil to defeat and complex politics and action and adventure but I've realized thats probably never going to be the kind of thing I'm good at.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I love it, but I do appreciate a translation unless the point is that the POV character also has no idea what's going on. If it's important to the context of the story PLEASE give me translations.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Homestuck, actually. My fic still exists on Fanfic.net and I'm too terrified to read it.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

It's gotta be Someone Wicked - I think this was the fic that convinced me of what I really cared about when writing a story. Before that I thought I needed something maybe more compelling than just exploration of character and relationships and trauma and intimacy, but then I wrote this very like, simple story where I just got to hyperfocus on those things and it was just exactly what I wanted to write. And apparently people liked to read it, too, which is neat.

tagging @cutestkilla @facewithoutheart @you-remind-me-of-the-babe @fatalfangirl @bookish-bogwitch @aristocratic-otter @captain-aralias @whatevertheweather @nightimedreamersworld @orange-peony @larkral @shrekgogurt

[youhideastar]

20 questions for fic writers

Thank you for inviting me, @chrononautintraining!

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

133

2. what’s your total ao3 word count?

1,392,316

3. what fandoms do you write for?

I tend to be a serial fandom monogamist; right now I'm writing for CQL/The Untamed, but my other biggest fandoms were White Collar and Hockey RPF (biggest in terms of how much I wrote for them, not the size of the fandom).

4. what are your top 5 fics by kudos?

So Wise We Grow and its sequel, it may be that the gulfs will wash us down (Star Trek AOS); Unorthodox Methods (SPN/White Collar crossover); Living Proof (White Collar); and Concord (The Untamed).

5. do you respond to comments? why or why not?

Almost always! If I'm feeling really low-energy, I may not reply to comments that are solely emojis, but I try to respond to those as well with at least a thank-you. The only exception to my general policy of responding is comments where I seriously cannot tell if they are positive or negative (e.g., "I hate you for making me cry" - I get that one a fair amount), because I don't want to be like "I'm glad you liked it!" when they actually didn't - I feel like that would make me look really arrogant lol. I respond to comments because I treasure them and want to encourage folks to keep commenting!

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Definitely Hands Open, Eyes Closed... and I was so bothered by it that I wrote a 200k follow-up getting those characters to their happy ending!

7. what’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Oh, jeez, I almost only do happy endings, so that's tough. I am partial to the ending of Dangerous, which is happy both interpersonally (WWX and LWJ are together! they have a baby!) and politically (that baby is going to blow up entrenched prejudices! yay!)

8. do you get hate on any fics?

I don't, and I have no idea why not, beyond the fact that I usually have anon commenting turned off. Don't get me wrong, I do get strongly negative comments sometimes, but nothing I would characterize as "hate."

9. do you write smut? if so, what kind?

Oh, definitely. I guess I would say I tend toward tender, talky, d/s-inflected smut, but ultimately I do whatever the situation between the characters calls for.

10. do you write crossovers? what’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Almost never - it's pretty much just Unorthodox Methods.

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not to my knowledge.

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! I've been fortunate to have multiple fics translated, especially my hockey RPF fics.

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

Nope!

14. what’s your all time favorite ship?

See above re: serial monogamist - right now I would swear that it's Wangxian 4EVA but check back in in a couple years.

15. what’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Definitely my Wangxian lawyer AU. I have big chunks of it written, but it would be more than 100k and I have so many other WIPs in line ahead of it. It'll probably end up as WIP Amnesty, though it breaks my heart to say it.

16. what are your writing strengths?

Dialogue and worldbuilding.

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

Physical description is often an afterthought. I default to describing lighting when I have to set a scene. I struggle to create a sense of the passing of time unless I have an external scaffolding to set the story on - in hockey RPF, the rhythm of the hockey season could give me that scaffold, but in my fics for CQL, the struggle is back.

18. thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Best kept to a minimum, when it comes to actual dialogue, but when it comes to individual terms (Wen-guniang, hai shi, zhiji, etc., and Russian and Czech terms in hockey rpf), I do it pretty liberally. It's good for English speakers to have to look stuff up sometimes. It builds character. 😂

19. first fandom you wrote for?

Stargate: Atlantis!

20. favorite fic you’ve written?

My favorite fic I've written is actually a WIP Amnesty piece I never finished (but which readers have told me is satisfying as-is, thankfully): The Words in Your Head, an X-Men: First Class modern AU in which Charles and Erik are college students who help start a GSA (that's a gay-straight alliance, for those of you who were not queer teenagers in the late nineties or early aughts 😂) at Raven's high school. It's so personal to me (the kid who started her own high school's GSA 20 years ago) and carries so much of my own feelings about gender and queerness and queer community, and I feel so tender about the characters. I think, ultimately, the fact that it made me feel so raw is the reason I couldn't take it across the line to a polished final draft. But I will love it forever.

If you’d like to play, I hereby tag you in spirit! For the meme, I’ll invite @queenofattolia, @travelingneuritis, and @existentially-yibo.

[12romy]

Thanks @sebchal for tagging me!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Oof. 57, damn that's a lot, what am I doing with my life?? 53 of them in F1 (I know it says 52 but one of them is on anon lmao)

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

GUYS I JUST COUNTED AND APPARENTLY I'VE PUBLISHED AROUND 477K FOR THE F1 FANDOM??!!??! SEND HELP (there's another 100k in my wips rn)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

F1rpf, although I have a fic for The Sandman and one for Our Flag Means Death (let's forget about my works for spn lol)

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

So the first one is Odd ducks, the fic I wrote for The Sandman, which is pretty normal since the fandom is bigger. After that, only F1, with Let's try something else (sewis fake dating feat Seb and gay panic), A Change of Habits (my lonnnnnnng chewis fic following the 2022 season), Your Crush is Showing (Brocedes, the first long fic I completed. Lots of smut.) and finally, Remember to forget (me), brocedes lewis!amnesia fic. I am very proud of the last one, mostly because it's super angsty and I torture Nico so much in it lmao

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do, actually, but usually I procrastinate on it, and I took ages. It's just, like, I feel it important to thank everyone for the comments, but it can feel a little repetitive and so I just tend to... Push it back to the next day, again and again. When it's on a multi-chapter fic, I reply before publishing the new chapter usually, but if it's a one-shot or the last chapter... Well. You'll get an answer but god knows when ahah

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Oof, that's between Losing it all, a really dark fic about Nico, and Too Late, a bad ending 3344 fic based on Monza 2021 :)

(be careful about the tags if you go and read them btw)

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Damn, that's a difficult question, I love writting sappy endings... But actually I think it's the ending of Welcome in the family!

It's a cute fic about Kimi/Tonio/Minttu, and the ending is definitely what I consider one of the happiest, mostly because of a little time-jump that allows to see the future ^^

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I did once, actually, on the 3344 fic I mentionned earlier. I think the person was just a max fan and didn't appreciate the way I make him suffer... I had put the write tags and all, so idk why they clicked on it. Anyway, it was scary and upsetting and I'm glad it only happened once ^^"

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Hell yeah. Go have a look, honestly, there's no way I can summarise it. I write way too much of it, I think (and most of it hasn't been published yet I think)

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Nope, but I should, it could be fun! Actually, I'd like to write a Lewis/Lil Nas X one day, so who knows. That's not at the top of my list, though.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I... Don't know, actually? How do you even check that? I hope not ahah ^^"

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! Someone offered to translate one of my fic in Chinese!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I DID, The Prince and the Knight, with my wonderful @feuerspirit !!!!!! And I don't want to spoil, but me and @metheevilgenius miiiiight publish a little os at some point ;)

14. What’s your all time favourite ship?

Oh, such a hard question... I'll go with brocedes, but it's really mean to make me chose only one. They're just.... *siiiigh*

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Definitely this BDSM seb/charles/mick and lewis/pierre I have started. I didn't publish it and it's like 20k long but I'm completely stuck and haven't worked on it in a long time. Not totally happy with it either ^^"

16. What are your writing strengths?

Uh, good question? I don't know, I get compliments about the characterisation... But other than that, I like to think I have a pretty good sense of humour and I'm able to make people laugh (or like, I hope. I make myself laugh, which is a good begining)

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

The fucking dialogues.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I like to use petnames in other languages cause petnames always feel more personnal when you use it in your own language. So with the F1 drivers, it's nice cause not all of them are english! I tend to put some German or some French sometimes in my fics for full sentences, but I try not to do it too much. If you don't understand the language, it can be very frustrating.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Time to dig up my old ff.net account lmao

Nah, actually, I remember very well of my first fic. I was 15, it was two pages long, I was feeling bad about writing a fic in the first place although it didn't involve any romance. I deleted it a few hours after posting it, ahah. It was for the fandom of a french youtube show called Aventures. It's like, people playing a dnd style game, it's pretty cool and I was really into it for a long time.

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

The fic I love the most of is definitely Up or Down. It's one of my favourite fic I've wrote. It's one of my early work, so it's a little clumsy and far from perfect, but I have good memories of myself writing it. I was in vacation in Rome at the time, alone, and I spent my time wandering in the city and thinking about my fic, it was amazing. And well, the content of the fic is also nice I guess XDDD

-

noooo idea who did this thing, and who didn't, so ignore if you've already done it or don't want to! I tag @feuerspirit @n-ico-ando @sunshinesebby @sionisjaune

[prince-of-elsinore]

Twenty Questions for Fic Writers

How many works do you have on ao3?

32. (Three are orphaned, all old fic; one spn fic is under anon)

What's your total ao3 word count?

627,118 words (I assume the anon fic is included in ao3 stats, and I added the orphans manually.) That's more than I expected, but it does stretch back to fic I started writing in 2011!

What fandoms do you write for?

Under my current pseud, Supernatural and The Outsiders. I have WIPs underway for both! I also have a languishing WIP for M*A*S*H* :( In the past I have written for the MCU, The Walking Dead, Hetalia, Teen Wolf, and The New Adventures of Old Christine.

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1. Ephemeron (MCU, Starker), 1,393 kudos; 2. With A Bit Of Spit And Luck (SPN, Wincest), 401 kudos; 3. Is It Tomorrow (Or Just the End of Time) (SPN, Wincest), 304 kudos; 4. Closing Night (SPN, Wincest), 222 kudos; 5. Baton Rouge (SPN, Wincest), 205 kudos It's no surprise to me that my one MCU fic and the only multi-chapter fic on this list, though forever unfinished, has far and away the most kudos, and that all top 5 fics are rated E. If we knock Ephemeron off the top spot and just look at fics under my current pseud, then 5th place would go to Some Starless Night (Love May Come an' Tap You on the Shoulder) (SPN, Wincest), 184 kudos (and rated M!)

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes! I haven't always in the past, though I always liked engaging with readers, but ever since I returned to fic in 2020 when I started writing for spn I've made sure to on principal. Not always quickly, but eventually. I'm really so grateful to the small fraction of readers who leave comments so I want to express my gratitude that they took the time! I also love giving thoughtful responses to thoughtful comments. Sometimes readers have unique insights into my work!

What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

A lot of my fics have fairly bleak or bittersweet/mixed state endings (my favorite type!); of my current pseud fics, I'd say the bleakest is either Plano: Some Town Halfway In Between (SPN, John/Dean) or Road Risk (SPN, Wincest). If we're looking at all-time fics, the angst gets--uh, angstier: Ludovicus Caecus (APH, Germancest), based on Oedipus Rex, ends with Ludwig killing Gilbert, gouging out his own eyes, and carrying his brother's severed head around in a bag; and When the Dead Do Not Rest (APH, Germancest) ends with Ludwig keeping Gilbert's severed head in a chest. Although in that case he's sort of happy with the situation so maybe it doesn't count...

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Baton Rouge (SPN, Wincest) and Like They Talk About In Books (The Outsiders, Ponypop) are pretty equally happy, with both ending on a hopeful note for the new relationship and the characters finding a sense of belonging in each other's arms <3

Do you get hate on fics?

Not outright! The worst I've gotten have been a couple rude, entitled comments along the lines of "why don't you write what I want you to write." I soundly told them off.

Do you write smut?

Yes :) I'm very thankful to various spn fandom smut events (Salt Burn Porn, Bro-Bang, and more) for helping me get my freak back on.

Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Not generally. I like to stay close to canon, for the most part. The only one I ever tried was my Teen Wolf/The Internship crossover Colors That Are Real, which used the fact that both starred Dylan O'Brien as the flimsy excuse for a twincest ship, lol

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! Maybe more than one, I can't remember. I've definitely gotten several requests to translate, but idk how many of those people went through with it. The one I know of for sure is Ephemeron, which was translated at least partially into Chinese, and fully into Russian. I was actually really touched by what a robust following it had in Russian fandom. I used to go on the site and use google translate to read people's comments :)

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Nope.

What's your all-time favorite ship?

gotta go with the one, the only, the ultimate, Wincest.

What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

That M*A*S*H* fic I mentioned. It's post-canon Beejhawk. I've considered posting the two chapters I have; they sort of work on their own.

What are your writing strengths?

Rhythm and tempo! Creating an atmosphere. Dialogue. Pacing. Voice.

What are your writing weaknesses?

For spn, I really rely on good betas to check my characterization. Canon is so sprawling and the characters change so much and are so essentially complex and contradictory; it really helps to have a trusted second set of eyes to say 'hmm I don't think Sam would do that in that way at this point in canon' or 'this sounds a little like early seasons Dean more than late seasons.' They also point out where language can sound more specific to the character, which doesn't always come easy with spn's lingo and references. But honestly my biggest weakness is consistency of output/motivation :(

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

To be avoided at all costs. And if it must be done, you better know what you're doing or at least do your damn homework and try to get a native speaker to check it over.

First fandom you wrote for?

Hetalia (APH) 😅

Favorite fic you've written?

Damn that's so hard haha. I think I'd have to go with Baton Rouge, but Plano: Some Town Halfway In Between is a close second. I'm also happy to report that my current WIPs, for spn and The Outsiders, may well become my new faves. I'm very excited about both projects!

Tagged by @buddyaldridges--Thank you for the tag! This was a fun restrospective! Tagging @nigeltde-fic, @flownwrong, @zmediaoutlet, @balefully, @nevergettingoverwincest and anyone who wants to do it!

[mayalaen]

20 questions for fic writers

Thanks to @hullosweetpea for tagging me!

First, my AO3

How many works do you have on AO3?

186

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

2,072,229 words (don't ask the count for fics NOT posted 😱)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Supernatural, Stranger Things, Fargo, Stargate 'verse, Hannibal, The Blacklist, Dickensian, Angel+Buffyverse and more

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Alpha House 'Verse, Resonance, Best Brother Ever, CONventional Psychopathy Part 1: Primary Deviance, and Try on for Size - all SPN fics

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do, but I get into weird moods where it's hard to do it, so I'll go for a while without responding and then do a bunch to catch up.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Probably Inside (SPN). It's short but gory and really not a happy ending.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I tend to leave things on a good feeling but I think the one that has the most whiplash type of oh shit this is bad to oh wow we're all good is Rewritten in the Stars.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

In comments and in anon messages sent on Tumblr, but I delete immediately because I refuse to feed trolls. For the most part readers are SUPER awesome and I really appreciate them!

9. Do you write smut?

Tons!

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Open Sesame Street Walker is by far the wackiest one. It's a choose your own adventure but every choice leads to insanity 😂

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Yup. I wouldn't have minded any other fic being stolen because it's all fanfic, but this person managed to grab the ONE fic I'm also writing as original fic and it's a world that's been living in my head since I was like 9 years old. It means a lot to me, so to have someone take it and make money off it with the possibility of fucking up a future book deal sucks. Every time I get it taken down, she puts it back up a few weeks later.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

I think there's at least one, possibly two fics translated.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I wrote one crackfic, but I'd love to write more with somebody. I think it would be fun.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

I can't say I have a favorite. I'm too much of a multishipper to pin down one in any fandom. The closest I can get is the OT3 of Leverage, Eliot/Hardison/Parker.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

I really think I'm gonna finish all my WIPs. Might be delusional, but oh well.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Dialog. It's harder for me to put in a lot of description on surroundings because I always think it's going to be boring to the reader, which is silly.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Keeping it short and to the point. The only short fics I've written were crackfic.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

The closest I came to this is Castiel's noises in Resonance 'Verse. It's just animal noises. I don't think I'll ever attempt to actually write in another language. The most I would do is italics so it tells the reader it's spoken in another language.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Stargate SG1

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

It changes depending on mood, but right now it's Caging the Mongoose. It's not popular at all, but it's a Blacklist/SPN crossover and it's got all the things I love plus Dean is schizophrenic in it.

tagging (with no pressure or obligation): @actualalligator @unforth @ltleflrt @whataboutthefish @wheels-of-despair @peachonified @kallisto-k @lochnesswriter and anybody else who wants to play! Please tag me so I can see your stuff 💜

[compo67]

Do fics ever remind you of a certain person, time, place, etc? Some of your work I read back in uni and whenever I reread, it takes me back

Hello dear anon,

Yes, absolutely. Lexicale's Dawnbringer Verse always makes me think of when I was working at a bookstore. Those were good times. Most of the Classic Wincest/J2 fics (you know, the big ones from authors like nyxocity and candle_beck) remind me of when I was first getting into the show back in 2012. These are both happy and sad memories. I was homeless and couch surfing at the time, so I latched onto SPN and SPN fic as a way to cope with what was going on.

So, while I have fond memories of those fics (and highly recommend them!), I have not reread them in years. This is also why I still haven't rewatched the show. Lots of memories, not all of them great.

My own fics? They also bring back memories when I reread them. Like, an ex partner loved my work "The Shortest Distance" so much that she bound it for me. I still have it. Or how there are installments of TCV inspired by partners I've had over the years or jobs I had at the time. Rereading Photo Op takes me back to when I was first attending cons and wow, those are good memories.

I remember writing "It Takes a lot of Water" in the breakroom of my first bookstore job. I would sit on a grody little couch and handwrite chapters, then type them up when I got home.

I remember working my first office job in 2016 and commuting to the city. I took my laptop some days and wrote porn on the train. Or the time I was an election judge and wrote a one act play on the government's time.

If I look back at my "career" in fandom, I am pretty content about it. :)

I wish you nothing but happy memories when rereading my fics. <3

Thank you for the ask.

[mpregjohnwinchester]

fic quiz

tagged by the wonderful @nameslikeguns, thank you!

1. How many works do you have on ao3? 38! Got two WIPs cooking so hopefully I'll hit 40 by the new year :)

2. What's your total ao3 word count?

226,530

3. What fandoms do you write for? Literally just SPN these days. I do tend to just write for one fandom for years at a time though!

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

when i'm down on my knees you're how i pray

someone forever warm

when i hear your lips make a sound

and if you crave it then you know that you are injured

i don't mean to suggest that i loved you the best

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? Yes - eventually. I am always so happy and grateful for comments, they fuel me, but I'm bad at replying to them bc as @nameslikeguns said I can find it difficult to respond bc I find kind words hard to know how to respond to. IRL if someone compliments me I tend to just squirm lmao so my responses to comments are the online equivalent of that I guess! I tend to just scattergun reply to my whole inbox all at once when I feel brave enough.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Oh gosh; as someone who mostly writes angst this is really difficult to say! Most of my endings are *~angsty~*. but I guess the first that came to mind is i don't mean to suggest that i loved you the best.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? That's easy lmao. so many moving parts or maybe some unholy war, which is a fic I forget about because i wrote it so early on... but it has a happyish ending!

8. Do you get hate on fics? i don't know about hate but i've had the odd pass agg anon here and there who wanted to tell me my edgelording triggered their IBS or about how much they hate john. Just makes me lol tbh.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Is the pope Catholic... :) Yeah my fics are predominantly smutty but I don't write a lot of straightforward porn these days (I want to but the muse doesn't take me there). Wanky as this is going to sound I usually build the story around the smut so I can get horny and Make A Point at the same time. Works pretty well for me!

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I used to write a ton of bandslash back in thr day and that quite often involved crossovers from different, er, bands. I'm not going to talk anymore about that though lmao.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not fully stolen to my knowledge but there was a fic going around tumblr recently that had quite clearly borrowed heavily and too specifically from this fic to be a coincidence. The person in question when my friend investigated was actually a minor so... it felt really difficult to do anything about it lol, I'm not about to go after a child on the internet. So I just made a pass agg reblog of the original fic instead like "Hey recognise this?" like the mature and sensible adult I am. But BELIEVE the bee in my bonnet is still buzzing about that.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Yes in my previous fandom I had a few translated into Chinese and Russian! That was really cool.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Yes several back in my bandslash days... I wish I could refind my Franz Ferdinand girlies from LJ and confess that I was one of the people behind "the dark!fic" lmao. (Or maybe not bc I was like 14 and had no business being in that community or posting what I was posting).

14. What’s your all time favorite ship? John/the world. I want that old man to fuck everyone. Or possibly get fucked by everyone depending on where the mood is taking me.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? Serial killer John may be one of my roman empires and yet it lies in googledocs gathering dust. One of my resolutions for 2024 is to finish it.

16. What are your writing strengths? Ugh these questions make me feel so awkward lmao. I mean... I think I have quite a good range? Which is feedback I get quite a lot so hopefully there's some truth in it! And I think I'm quite good at imagery and emotional pacing ig? I'm not sure what else to call it. Also in the vein of common feedback anyway.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? SELF DOUBT. Honestly mate if I wasn't bogged down with that shit so much I'd be dangerous 🤪 It does make me write slowly and abandon a lot of stuff I start but I'm working on it. From a technical standpoint though I do struggle with plot. I think I'm more of a vibes/moment in time writer than an epic plot writer which does gall me lol. But yeah - I definitely struggle with longer works because I struggle with keeping things cohesive and overwriting/explaining then just overwhelming myself. Again, a resolution to work on for 2024. I also feel like I struggle with dialogue sometimes; if it doesnt magically come to me fully formed which is rare I'll really have to work at it. Trust me if you've ever written a dialogue heavy fic from me then just know that chances are said dialogue will have chopped and changed and been edited within an inch of its life.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I can only speak English sadly and have ultimate respect for people who write in a language that is not their first. That's just so amazing to me.

19. First fandom you wrote for? The White Stripes. Lmao. There were quite a lot of us back in the day.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written? Hands down i heard love is blind. sharp teeth dry heat and when the stiff wind blows are close seconds because i lived my goddamn truth with both of those fics 🥲 And I have a somewhat complicated relationship with what it is but I'm happy that it exists and i'm happy that it still does the rounds occasionally!

tagging @amiwritesthings @castratedsamwinchester @spnyuri @lovetranasction @beautyandthebeastiality @babybrothershaped and whoever else wants to do this idk who is and isn't writing atm lol

[galaxythreads]

lore on Five out of Five is an Ideal You Can't Have please!! I love that one soooo much 👉👈

your wish is my command, anon. <3 thanks for the ask.

LORE FOR FIVE OUT OF FIVE:

it was based on this fic

I've tried to do a sensory deprivation fic for Loki more than once. This was the...third? attempt

After watching SPN, writing THor and Loki's relationship was a little easier. Taking the messy dysfunction from SPN and finding areas where it overlaps between the brother pairs was interesting

After taking a break from MCU for the better part of a year, this was the first fic that I wrote and I finished and I felt so accomplished and happy with myself....only for someone to promptly tell me what a terrible job I was doing with the characters on another fic. Made me want to sit in the shame corner, lol. Actually, that's what this venty tumblr post is referring to.

a big portion of this fic was me exploring Thor's relationship with Sif and the Warriors, trying to figure out WHY Thor was chilling with them when he was ignorant to the way they treated his brother. The reason that Thor is so desperate to keep their friendship is because of how severely he and Loki were isolated as children. The fact that anyone would willingly choose to spend time with him outside of their family is utterly baffling to him and something he's desperate to keep

I have absolutely no idea what they killed at the beginning of the fic

I started the fic in Jan of 2021 and then finished it in may 2021 after a run. I very distinctly remember coming back and just wanting to finish something. I think I was about 10 pgs in and just shoved my way through the last bit

I had actually intended for THOR to be the one who was losing his senses when I started this, but it didn't end up that way

"Ranging from books to entire tables and something that Thor suspects is some type of stove" -- this is 1000% a reference to the classic "and even the kitchen sink was there" joke, which I thought was absolutely hilarious

^^^ this is a jab at the Loki series. Most of this is a jab at the Loki series, honestly. Wait. When on earth did I write this--

Oh dear. I was already taking pointed stabs at it and it hadn't even been released yet. Well. That's embarrassing for MCU.

^^^ this was inspired by watching SPN where they would bless cursed objects and that would often fix them.

"Though the cold hadn't bothered him, Sif's continued shivering had made them stop for the night. Loki had pointed her toward his newly made flame without a word." -- this is a reference to The Weeping Siren where they were all making fun of Loki for not being able to light a fire

"Loki's not a witch, but the Norns know he gets the funny feelings of one." -- This is a reference to BBC Merlin fics, where the Knights and Arthur refer to Merlin's magic as his "funny feelings"

^^^ Loki already knew something was wrong right here and didn't say anything because Thor got angry. The effects of the cloth-thing were almost instantaneous.

"There isn't a lot that Loki won't approach if Thor has first and vice versa. Their stupidity often goes hand in hand. And Loki wouldn't even go past the doorway, despite the giant monster that was attacking them. That's…that's probably more than just a funny feeling." -- there is no loki without thor and no thor without loki and that includes them being idiots

---

"His mother has told him endlessly that one of the easiest methods to disperse curses is through fire or some other purifier. Salt sometimes works as well."

^^ i try to make a point in fics to have Thor not be completely ignorant of magic. Look. my sister is really REALLY into rocks and has infected me with knowledge of them despite my best efforts. there is no way Thor hasn't picked up something from listening to Loki rant about it for literal decades.

----

^^^ Loki knew what was happening (mostly) throughout the entire fic. He just wasn't saying anything. From the moment the cloth touched him, Loki couldn't use his magic. He didn't know what to do and he was terrified, but he didn't know how or if he should tell anyone.

---

""You should just speak up," Thor chides patiently, "I'm sure there must be something interesting underneath all of that hair," " -- shameless reference to Dean making fun of Sam's hair for all of SPN.

---

Thor sighs. "Why don't you lay down? I'll get some supplies so we can start bringing down your fever. You should have said something."

A flash of relief and gratitude flickers across his sibling's face, brief, but intense. He wasn't expecting that, Thor realizes. " --- the last time Loki received help for something was..... WHEN??? POINTED LOOK AT HIS ENTIRE FAMILY.

Also this is not me projecting my family issues into this. Nope! (it is. My family issues are everywhere in this)

---

"Thor allows him the moment of weakness, cupping a hand against the back of Loki's neck, trying to reassure him" -- I'm not sure if this is actually true, but I saw on BBC's Sherlock post that you only let people you deeply trust touch the back of your neck. I remember trying to research that as I wrote that line, lol. I never found an answer.

---

^^^ I tried to make a point of showing how differently the Warriors were handling this and Thor. Thor actually addressed the problem and SAW loki, the warriors just ignored him until he annoyed them enough. It's like. The Warriors tolerated Loki and kind of pretend this whole thing wasn't happening. I didn't want them to be complete assholes, but it was a tough balance to write. They mostly ended up being assholes, lol.

---

"Frigga smiles warmly at him, but her eyes are distant and dark. Thor looks, but isn't surprised that he can't see his father anywhere." --- ALSO making a point about how ABSENT Odin is from his children's lives. Frigga is there. Odin is just GONE.

---

"Mindlessly, Thor dumps off his part of the recovered stolen items to the palace's head of artifacts and goes to give his report to his father." --- Loki is in the hospital and he is dying. They know this. Odin is in the throne room. He wasn't busy. Thor talked with him almost instantly. Odin was in the throne room by choice and couldn't be bothered to make an appearance in the healing wing. This wasn't an accident, it was intentional character placement.

----

""If your brother had been killed, you can't imagine the realm-wide mess—" Odin releases a breath, stopping himself, -- I firmly believe that if Loki were to actually die, he would revert to his Jotun form and that would cause the realms-wide mess Odin is talking about.

----

"—a witch created that to kill her enemies quickly and painfully by removing their senses then shutting down organs. I'd only heard rumors that her enchanted objects were still around. She created more than a dozen to send to her enemies." --- I like to imagine this was one of the witches that raised Frigga. That's how she recognized it so quickly.

---

One of the few stories that I didn't end on a happy ending. It's kind of a bittersweet ending and this was intentional. I read this fic where Loki got possessed by like this mirror thing (mirror,mirror by lise, a03), and it ended as a MESS and it was so satisfying. XD

[crackers4jenn]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

(inside the cut to spare you)

1. How many works do you have on Ao3? 43. Some of them contain multiple fics, though. I might be pushing 50 if they were all out on their own.

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count? 408,702

3. What fandoms do you write for? On ao3, I've written for: Supernatural, Community, Rhett & Link, The Office, New Girl, Stranger Things. I also wrote a 'characters who were never the slayer' fic with characters from Glee, Parks and Rec, Miranda, himym, etc etc. I orphaned some Rookie Blue fics that I posted over there just because I got an anon message asking me if I could unlock them from lj.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos? All destiel fics:

sink - "Where to?" A 9.06 coda. (To be fair on this, I think there was a weird ao3 glitch that really skyrocketed the hits.)

Mr. and Mr. Winchester - "No pet names, I popped the question, and you're the girl." (Or, Dean and Castiel: fake-married. Set in a hypothetical s9.)

here's a map, here's a shovel, here's my achilles heel - Post-15x19. Turns out, Dean doesn't have to ask to get Cas back.

a way not steep - Dean's twenty-six and his roommate's a guy who cries during E.T.

wedding guy - "I'm Castiel. I wanted to let you know I've been noticing you all night, and I wanted to leave this with you, before I left." (aka Cas slips Dean his number at a wedding, and a friendship/relationship takes off from there.)

5. Do you respond to comments? Not always, which is v. lame of me. I do try to, but it feels overwhelming to think up different ways to say "thanks for reading" without it coming off as perfunctory because it's my tenth "thanks" in a row.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Hmmm, maybe lights down low. 40k words of time traveling destiel just to bring Dean and Cas back to the purgatory portal where Cas doesn't follow Dean out. But, listen. I was proud of the twist ending.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? sky full of stars, maybe? Rhett and Link boning in a tent, with a sweet lil flashback to end things.

8. Do you get hate on fics? Nah.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Yes. Yes, I do. The kind where they bone.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? Not all that often, but I've written some wild ones. A Supernatural/Community tale where circa s5 Dean and Cas show up to Greendale, lured by Abed's Jesus movie. A himym/Community crossover where Barney enrolled at Greendale to bag some community college hotties. I wrote a Rhett and Link/spn fusion, where they were hunters.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? I haven't.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? I've had people ask. If they ever did anything with that, I never got tagged or it was posted off ao3. Someone did a pod-fic of one of them once, though, that was pretty cool.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? I have, I have. Long ago, @milkshakemicrowave and I were writing a Community fic together. I think I wrote the first chapter, then convinced her to write with me. We bailed after maaaaybe getting into chapter 3? I've also co-written a couple J2 fics with my Cas/Misha/destiel-hating bestie. Under a pseudonym, obvs.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship? I mean, I've got lots of those. Depends on the day. But when it comes to reading, it's Dean/Cas hands down. There's an abundance of riches and I'm grateful every day for the free serotonin.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? I never posted it to ao3, but I have like 20k words written of a Dean/Cas (of course) fic I started writing between seasons 7 and 8, with Dean and Cas in purgatory before we knew anythinggg about purgatory. I got to the point where I needed to figure out how they were getting out.

16. What are your writing strengths? One of my favorite bits of feedback that I get most often is that I write dialogue how people actually talk, which is nice.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? Plot. It's not that I don't have big, plotty ideas, I just don't know how to string plot along in a coherent way. I'm always so impressed by plot-heavy stories that STAY plot-heavy.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I wouldn't personally, but more power to anyone taking on that challenge.

19. First fandom you wrote for? I want to say it was Buffy.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written? It's certainly not the best fic I've ever written, but I recently reread like only a best friend could and liked it enough I've been puttering away at a sequel.

[mediawhorefics]

What are u writting at the moment ?

I love all of your fics , they way you use words is beautiful.

Thank you for sharing a part of you with us in every fic .

oh anon. i'm.... not actively writing anything at the moment. idk what's up with me, i try and i try and it's like.... not happening at all? idk where the motivation is gone. even my original projects, i feel completely blocked on. it sucks because i'm still on medical leave for a bit so i technically have so much time for it.... and yet! rip.

thank you for the kind compliment though!

here's a tiny list of projects i'd love to write/finish if i ever get my mojo back:

the blood of words: obvs this is lowkey kind of my biggest priority. i feel awful about leaving a wip up that hasn't been touched since 2019 so i really want to get it done. i've managed to write a fair bit of extra material for it last spring (about 20k?) but i lost steam and it's been untouched for a while now.

the 1930s spn deancas au i started plotting a while back: there's not enough historical aus in the spn fandom IMO and i just like thinking about dean in 1930s little outfits trying to solve some spn mysteries and meeting occult/ancient history/mythology professor cas who has a big secret along the way...... this has literally no outline/no plot/nothing except VIBES and maybe 4/5 paragraphs, but i'm really attached to the idea.

the mandalorian dinluke au i started a few weeks back: got almost 5k and it's a mafia/crime/undercover cop au thingie but still set in the star wars universe. it'll probably go nowhere lbr, but i'd love to finish it because i think the idea is kinda fun. also dinluke as a rarepair is so fucking enlightened i'm kind of obsessed with it ?

any of my original projects.... i've got like 2 ? 3? in development and i'm doing fuck all with them. at this rate, i'll never be published rip my dreams etc etc.

so yeah, got a few Ideas i'm fiddling with but no actual writing is going on.

[wanderingcas]

Hey! It's me with the "confession" sorry to use you like a sound board. I used to be someone who was really active in both the Destiel fandom and on your blog, but sometime at the beginning of last year i started reading fic and interacting with another fandom i started to really like, in doing so though my brain started to convince me that because i haven't read a fic or interacted with anything super that, i hated it, and the people i so often spoke with. Covid hit not long after, that combined with other things made me spiral...Hard. i had to take a step back, to realize this borderline obsession i had was ruining my mental health, as well as my enjoyment of fandom and fic in general. When super was announcing its final i cried, when the final episode aired even more so. But, strangely, i wasn't as bothered as i was convincing myself to be, in a way it set my mindset free. At the beginning of this year i was able to finally start reading fics and enjoying other fandoms! Able to start having fun where previous it was just stress. I'm able to flow between spaces like water and I've never been happier. We also got a pair of rescue kittens last month! I love them very much and seeing them grow makes me genuinely happy, and now i can join them. I'm sorry to do this on anon and for this message in general but as someone who actually helped me get here i thought you should know, seven years of super was enough, four years of your blog was not, but it's time for me to go. Thank you for everything, good luck on your book! I know you'll do great. Ek sien jou weer, ja? Totsiens.

ahh anon i totally understand <3 ive been stepping back from spn a lot lately too, so i get it - and not just because it's ended - for me fandom has become less of a positive space (not anybody's fault, it's just how i've been treating it etc) and i really commend you being able to realize you needed to take a few steps back. i'll very much miss you around but completely understand and hope that life brings you a lot of joy and light!! don't be afraid to pop back in and say hi every now and again if you want to ;)

[159potterhead]

I used do something like this too I'll imagine I'm in a talk show and I'm the guest and I'll vent about things in front of imaginary audience, crack a few jokes and those people loved me😅

It's okay. If you ever feel low let me know I'll be always around lurking over here I'm also I was thinking about setting a camp in your ask box if you don't mind I mean the place is huge and we can be neighbours. We can hang out all the time. Invite each other over dinner 💖🤩

(I listen to all the new song you put in here. It's a lovely song. You have a great taste in music✨)

Yeah I remember. (I'll get to the writer thing but since you asked I should tell you this) I also used to do painting and I get crazy while doing it, I'm kinda perfectionist about doing things so I don't do things unless I'm the best at it (coz I'm not good with handling criticism and anxiety is a real deal) I used to do sketching and canvas painting and it was like a do or die situation for me coz I don't let myself eat or do anything else unless I get it right and perfectly done and during that time I used be cranky for few days. It's been more than a year and I really wanna do something but yeah I don't have that kind of energy anymore. And yeah I write too although I'm new to the writing thing. I started writing like 2 years ago and those fics were only meant for me. I had a lot of ideas so I wrote a few things and wip and I never had courage to post them coz there are many great people writing better stories and I never planned the ending of any of the fics so I never posted them. I write mainly destiel so a few months back in December I was mad at the show of course and few other things and I was like screw it I'm gonna post the thing. No one's gonna read it anyway. It's this fic I wrote in 2019 and I never planned ending to it and that's the first one I posted and people really liked it I've got like 86 comments so at first I thought they were being nice but now I think they really like it so I've to plan some ending to it I can't abandon it. I've posted around 11 chapters to that one. God! I've to write more. I can shoot you up with link I would love to know your opinion but I think you will recognise me coz I have similar username there.

Lets play a game called who am I. Give me your top guesses if I'm one of them I'll shoot up the link. (Have you heard that fall out boy song; Let's play this game called "when you catch fire I wouldn't piss to put you out")

And I'm assuming you also write fics you've done a great job earlier. Do you write Harry Potter or destiel or anything else? What's your favourite trope?

🎶I'm an angel with a shotgun fighting til' the wars won I don't care if heaven won't take me back I'll throw away my faith, babe, just to keep you safe don't you know you're everything I have? And I, wanna live, not just survive, tonight🎶

omggg I am so sorry!! I don’t know how long this has been sitting here! I didn’t receive any notifications from you since yesterday so I thought I’d check my inbox and boom, tumblr didn’t send me one for this ask! I feel so bad for making you wait so long! (I hope it wasn’t long tho, since idk when you sent this)

saaame😆 oo you have fans I see;)

thank you🥺 and you too btw, if you ever feel low or you wanna vent or rant, hit my inbox. a camp? baby i’ll build you a mansion<3 and yesss we could have dinner at each other’s house and sleepovers that’d be so fun!!😁💞

(aww you do?☺️ and thanks, I know😎 my taste in music is the only thing I’m confident about lol)

woooah my gf is a painter too?? jeez, get you💅😌✨ and wow that doesn’t seem... healthy😬. but I suppose the end results would have to be incredibly amazing right? I’ve seen your ask stories and they’re chefs kiss, so I bet your actual fics are even 10x better! ooo that’s great!!! I wanna read it so bad, but i’m afraid it’ll blow your cover😭 aah yes that’s what I thought! we’ll have to find a way.

ooooo that’s exciting. I sorta wanna know who you are but I’m also liking this anon vibes to be honest😫 and I secretly don’t want this to end. but okay let’s give it a go. hmm. I’ll try to guess your blog but not who cause honestly there’s a lot ahah. (and yess I love that song!😆)

you’re definitely a spn blog that’s for sure.

idk why but I feel like your url must have something to do with lotr since it means a lot to you.

you don’t post that much, and when you do it’s often reblogs. maaaybe some rants here and there but they’re usually no biggie.

you don’t have your pronouns in your bio, idk why i’m guessing this.

maybe i’m reading too much into this but I feel like your theme is either earthy or pastel.

I mostly write ow, and I have never completed anything in my entire life thank you very much. everything’s just wip💀 it sucks cause I could be only one page away from the ending but procrastinate and end up working on a new story. the cycle never ends sigh.... but I’ve been meaning to finish this one story that I’ve been writing for about two years lol, and I would like you to read it! I will let you know when I actually finish it;) and hmm idk what my favourite trope is honestly, if it vibes it vibes yk. what’s yours?

🎶no matter where I go, I'm always gonna want you back. no matter how long you're gone, I'm always gonna want you back. I know you know I will never get over you. no matter where I go, I'm always gonna want you back. want you back🎶💕

[chaos-and-recover]

Omg that anon is right. I literally am considering deleting my Twitter because I got a thanksgiving meal from Misha (lots of people did) and I have been getting nonstop harassment. It is NOT my fault Misha signed NDAs and it is NOT my fault the CW is using him for damage control and it isnt my fault within an hour he apologized and took it back AND TOLD US TO KEEP LOUDLY TALKING ABOUT IT SO WE DID. That isnt my fault! But I am BROKE and wanted a meal for my husband and I and went LIKE HE SAID WE COULD and after being harassed and gaslit and insulted and called crazy because I was pissed about Eileen, I make an innocent post thanking Misha for the meal and IMMEDIATELY I am called a liar and saying I was trying to push a destiel agenda on Misha bu showing up (literally all I said was Happy Thanksgiving) and that I should've taken a picture with Misha to prove I actually got a meal? What the hell. And this whole time I was like "I hate fucking tumblr bullshit" but i am ON TWITTER. And wow I just get on tumblr and see you FLIPPING OUT on a foreign dubber and making the exact same comments that wincest shippers are using. But now I get it. You weren't flipping out or being one of those creepy incest RPF ABO weecest fic writers that literally spent Thanksgiving harassing me. But that is what I THOUGHT because the language is different from what it used to be. Seriously, everyone needs to see this. Because the context is absolutely different now. And now I am considering looking over my own tumblr blog with that in mind and thinking about some arguments I've had with anons. Really there should be essays written on how different sites have different cultures because this explains so much. Also just fyi nobody hates SPN as much as a SPN fan trust me I know because I am a SPN hating SPN fan.

I’ve been saying since like S8 that I’ve invested too much time to not see how SPN plays out even if it’s not as good as it was and HOOOO BOY did I not know how much worse/longer it was gonna get lol but I definitely am an SPN-hating SPN fan.

And I’m so sorry you had to deal with that anon, that’s the kind of bullshit I do NOT miss around here. Twitter really is just 2012-2015 Tumblr. I’m so glad you were able to get a meal though, I think it’s amazing what Misha did, and I hope the Twitter trolls didn’t ruin it for you. <3

[flyingcatstiel]

1. Hello again, I am the same anon who sent both of your latest two anonasks. I think there was some confusion so I'll clarify. I don't even ship stony(I've only read handfuls of fics), I ship destiel and I like all mcu characters equally and I am not team cap nor iron but I am a bitter cas girl. There was NO intention to bring any wank or ships/characters bashing to your blog. I was just so angry with 'we are' and your answer to the first ask got me thinking about stony.

2. But my ask was poorly and inadequately worded to confuse you of the ulterior intention and I apologize. Though I shouldn’t have use the ship names when I meant their general relationship both in canon and fanon, what I meant was in regard to the same situation, which is their mother’s deaths, Tony actually drew blood and all Dean did was say some words,

3. so one might think that actual physical conflicts not induced by any supernatural event indicate bad relationship but I feel Dean and Cas’s friendship and general relationship more unhealthy and unbalanced.

4. Now I just decided for my self that that’s probably because Tony and Steve has different visions, families, groups of friends and support system so even if there is conflict between them, Tony still got Pepper Rhodey and Happy and Steve got Bucky Nat and Sam.

5. So no one is left alone in the world. But if Dean’s angry with Cas, Cas is alone in the universe. I meant unhealthy like that. Cas has no one except Winchester families and if that makes Cas desperate for sense of belong and makes him apologize like that, that imao is unhealthy. But all in all, I am sorry for the confusion. I shouldn’t have been so blunt and out of the blue. Post 1502 made me go blind with unreasonable fury.

6. On a different note it’s interesting how wording and context make differences between being perceived as wank baiting anon hate or anon thanks. And I hope that this message is accepted as the latter because I am always grateful of all your reasonable words about Spn and fandom fruits. :) thanks for reading.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Heey, sorry for total misunderstanding with the previous ask and thank you for coming back and clarifying it! And yes, I’m kinda jumpy lately, since couple of my spn critical posts were hijacked by destiel haters and also earned me the blocking from destiel positivity crowd. That’s the fandom we have and that is one huge reason why I’m slowly sauntering into MCU fandom. To be brutally honest, that’s my advice to all bitter Cas girls - get out before you get too frustrated and hurt. The show will continue Cas whump because they don’t know what else to do, and destiel metas will spend all their energy justifying it. Instead of, you know, just saying that bad writing is bad writing. You can always come and vent in my inbox or via DM tho, I’ll try to answer as much as I can, because I feel you. 

OK, very quickly about CW movie and Tony’s anger vs Dean’s anger. I don’t think Tony’s situation is comparable at all here. Tony learns about Bucky killing his parents on Hydra’s orders after a long chain of very intense conflicts. That was literally the last drop, there’s little time to process it, and it is the culmination of the movie. On the other side, Dean and Cas conflict is never the centerpiece of SPN, it’s all subtext and Dean’s POV. Dean blaming Cas for Mary’s accidental death comes absolutely out of nowhere. They all knew that Jack is using his soul to do stuff, they all knew Jack needs supervision. FFS, Jack just brought Sam back from dead by using his soul. And now Cas is to blame for it? Not to mention that Dean and Cas relationship is way more complicated than MCU stony. Even if we take out romantic destiel subtext out of it, textually, Cas still is the closest person to Dean after Sam. Dean has called Cas his family, his brother several times. Dean grieved Cas in s13. And now, suddenly, it all means nothing because Dean is angry? Unpopular opinion about SPN writers under the cut.

I said it already back then and I still stand by my words - Berens wrote the line “You are dead to me” deliberately to yank the fandom. There are plenty of other words he could have used if he simply wanted to show Dean’s grief and uncontrollable anger towards Cas. Instead, SPN focused on one thing that would hurt the most and then used it in the promo. I literally saw post on my dash saying that OP was not gonna watch the episode because SPN is just meh, but, after seeing that promo, OP wanted to know why Dean said something so hideous to Cas. Remember how fans hoped that it’s a misleading promo? Remember how fans hoped that Dean will apologize to Cas? There’s an understanding that that line was too much. And, after s14 finale, I saw posts talking about how this is not relevant anymore because surely Jack’s death and Chuck’s machinations override whatever anger Dean could have towards Cas for not telling him about snake. And then 15x01 brought us that passive aggressive scene and, well, 15x02 took the cake. 

So, while I totally agree with you that the scene between Dean and Cas was terrible, my way of dealing with it is to blame SPN writers. First of all, I don’t understand what Dean is talking about there. Nothing was real? Does he mean some kind of Matrix type of reality where the real Dean is sleeping in a pod? Otherwise, it was all real. Tell Kevin Tran that his death and time after death was not real. Tell it to Jo, Charlie, Eileen that their deaths were not real. Cas speech is nice, but, honestly, not a groundbreaking revelation. Whedon’s Angel said it wittier, Dumbledore and Gandalf said it more fitting for their stories. There’s a Jewish proverb with similar sentiment. Like, this is nothing new! Our choices matter, sometimes it is the only thing that matters. I mean, everyone who has lived under authoritarian regimes, everyone who’s a minority and has to deal with privileged majority, knows this. To make Dean to refuse it in s15, is honestly very baffling. 

Like, I see that SPN writers want to draw some parallels with s4 by flipping Dean and Cas beliefs, but, scene subversion works only if you know why the first scene worked in the first place. I think this scene would have worked better if Dean would be just venting his understandable frustration with the situation. But instead, we got Cas apologizing, Dean still blaming Cas for Mary’s death (seriously wtf?) and then Dean walking out on Cas and refusing Cas’ belief in their choices being real. 

And here I come to my last point. Dean saying that their choices were not real because Chuck manipulated everything sounds very much like privileged middle class white people suddenly realizing that they are not calling the shots and then throwing into a towel. This really looks like the most “profound” revelation Bucklemming could’ve come up with. They gave similar moronic lines to Cas in 9x03, when Cas, former angel who watched humanity for thousand of years, was surprised that poor people are kind and generous. 

So, to me it looks like SPN writers are trying to be deep but in the end they write what they know best - angry white man is always right trope and le omg, if I’m not the center of the universe then everything was not real story. Which sucks, tbh. And clashes with older seasons of SPN. But here we are. And, since the conflict between Dean and Cas is based on such a weak argument, there can’t be real resolution, catharsis and growth. The current conflict serves only one purpose - to keep Cas and Dean on bad terms and to make Cas leave (because Misha’s contract something something). My worst fear - this stupid conflict will set Cas on self destructive/sacrificial path, and that will be it. Because let’s be serious, destiel is not the most important thing in s15. It’s just not. 

[compo67]

I've never been an rpf person but I decided I wanted to try j2 and your photo-op series was my first venture. I have been DEVOURING the entire thing and I just wanted to tell you how delightful it is and how excited I am that there's so much more from you that I can dig into when I finish it. I'm a latecomer to the spn fandom and have noticed that so many wonderful writers and artists have moved on to other things, so it makes me really really happy and excited to see that you're still here, blogging about and enjoying spn. thank you for everything you've written, I can't wait to experience even more of it !!!

Hellooooo anon!

Welcome to the world of Photo Op verse! It's been a wild ride since I first started it in 2013. If you have any questions about it, please feel free to ask either here or on AO3!

I'm so so glad to hear that you're *devouring* it! There's plenty in my archive to read when you get caught up with Photo Op. I have a Masterlist of Fic here for when you'd like to devour more. I need to update it since I've added new ones, but it's a good place to start.

The SPN fandom really has an embarrassment of riches. We are such a talented group. You have folks writing, creating art, making gifs, etc. the most wonderful content. Because you're new to the fandom, you have sooo much to explore and decide on what tropes you like, what elements of fic are a must or a no-go, on and on. It's so great you've decided to dive into our corner of fandom. :)

Thank you SO much for the lovely compliments and comments. You made my day, anon. <3

Now, back to writing more Photo Op. :D