#anyway …… I. ……. hate elyse so much

[itspileofgoodthings]

there is a point at which using your persona to make money simply invalidates any sincerity you try to put into it.

[penny-anna]

apropos of nothing, here is my Bisexual Alex P Keaton episode concept:

as the episode starts, Alex has recently got a new friend called uhh *spins wheel of names* Charles. Alex thinks Charles is just THE BEST. Charles shares all his interests and is also super smart and funny and generally great to hang out with and

rest of the family starting to get a little ?? at how much Alex likes to talk about Charles and how attached at the hip Alex & Charles are. "Is it just me or is Alex kinda obsessed with this Charles person" says Mallory. "I think it's nice that Alex has such a good friend" says Elyse.

anyway then Alex & Charles are hanging out together (late night study date bcos they are both nerds) and PLOT TWIST Charles makes a pass at Alex. it turns out that Charles 1) is gay 2) has a crush on Alex 3) has been trying to feel out if Alex reciprocates his feelings AND 4) has concluded that he does

Charles deeply apologetic on realising he has misread the situation. Alex mortified. horrified. leaves immediately.

Alex abruptly refuses to discuss Charles w his family but admits privately to Steven what happens and declares that, naturally, he can now never ever see Charles again. Steven encourages him to "be more open-minded." Alex says he'll think about it.

Alex shortly thereafter declares that Charles is now his boyfriend. Steven was not expecting this outcome. rest of family highly confused but overall supportive. (Jennifer very firm on the point that she thinks people should be able to date whoever they want.)

exception is Mallory, not because she is homophobic but bcos she flat out refuses to believe Alex likes boys. Mallory knows Alex and she is the world expert on liking boys. if Alex liked boys she would know. Alex is faking for some reason and she is going to figure out what his game is.

unfortunately having a boyfriend makes Alex approximately 150% more insufferable.

Alex will not shut up about how it's actually better for men to date other men because obviously a man can only have "true intellectual equality and emotional discourse" with another man. he starts sentences with "as a proud gay republican" approx 50 times a day.

Steven & Elyse want so much to be supportive bcos like they'd hate for people to think they were homophobic but Alex is just being so obnoxious about this.

eventually Charles breaks up with Alex.

"Alex," he says. "I've had enough intellectual discourse. I can't take it anymore. I just want to get laid, Alex. I'm gonna go find a boyfriend who'll actually make out with me, Alex."

it turns out that in spite of all his talk Alex & Charles haven't actually done anything other than go out to dinner and talk about politics.

Mallory takes this as vindication. "I knew it. You don't actually want to kiss boys, you've been faking this whole time."

Alex insists that he totally is into Charles and that he just got "nervous".

however the next day he declares confidently that he's done being gay. he is now back to being a "proud heterosexual republican". Elyse suggests that maybe he should engage in some self-reflection but he insists that he's straight now goodbye.

is Alex actually bisexual and deeply repressed OR is he a straight man who just hates women That Much. ending ambiguous!!

in a subsequent episode he has sex with a guy for real. this would either fix him OR make him 1000x worse, one or the other.

this concludes the bisexual Alex P Keaton agenda good night.

[umbracirrus]

WIP Wednesday 💛

Happy valentines day to everyone, not much to report on this week other than my only WIP this week - besides working on tweaking little details in the next chapter for The Perfect Storm, as well as the cross stitching progress I posted about earlier in the week - being smut. Even then, I think I've already posted a line of this WIP a few days back, just without any of the context.

That's about it. It's honestly just something that I've been working on to treat myself after a shitty start of the year, and of course, it's my beloved Balgruuf and Elyse... I'm aiming to get it done for my birthday next month. 😅 It's based a good four, five years after The Perfect Storm, and these two have been married for a while by this point.

Tagged by @thequeenofthewinter this week and @bostoniangirl21 last week!!

Needless to say, this is smut - don't feel obliged to read if you don't want to, and don't read if you're a minor.

------

“Are you certain?”

Elyse could feel her heart racing as Balgruuf’s finger rested against her lips. Forget any battles against dragons or her enemies over the years, this was most certainly her hardest battle – keeping quiet as he fucked her at such a slow, near torturous pace, all whilst he toyed with her in a way which made her want to cry out loud in ecstasy. In these brief few moments, she could only curse her dear husband for knowing her in the same way that a bard would their instrument, in that he knew exactly what strings to pluck or notes to play.

The sound of grumbling echoed off the walls. “Yes, Proventus. Elyse was training in here until he came along and asked to train with her too. His sword is right there, so they can’t be far.”

Balgruuf faltered for a moment, though it was not enough to dissuade him from continuing.

“What if they catch us?” she eventually let out in a breathy whisper, though she received little more than a smile back at first.

“They won’t. Not if you stay quiet, dearest.”

Her lips curled into a pout, at first through his response, but then through the empty feeling as he pulled out of her. “Balgruuf, why do you choose now to be such an ass- Fuck!” She had to bite her lips as he plunged back in, her entire body writhing as he now moved his hands to her hips, her back arching. Tears were pricking at the corner of her eyes, not because of the cruel yet sweet torment that he was putting her through, but rather through the agonising pleasure that was coiling up inside her as her beloved filled her up again and again and again.

“Hm. They don’t appear to be here though. Perhaps they retired to their quarters? The Lady Dragonborn does tend to steal away the Jarl at the most inopportune of times...” Proventus sighed. “Thank you anyway. I am certain that I will find him eventually.”

The sound of the porch doors opening filled the room, as did two sets of footsteps.

“She hates being called that, you know.”

“Well, as the wife of a Jarl and technically still a Thane, I will address her with the due-“

The doors slammed shut, and barely a moment had passed before her jaw slackened and the moan which she had been holding in was let out. As much as she wanted to chastise him for doing that to her – to them both – she simply couldn’t find the words and instead pulled his face towards hers and claimed his lips.

[andres-ortega]

Wingard is in jail. His associates are with him, or dead, and I have no idea how to feel.

I thought this moment would bring me immeasurable relief and triumph. I imagined having a party with my friends, cheering for the downfall of the man who ruined our lives. This was supposed to be the pinnacle of my existence; the thing I’ve worked towards for a majority of my life.

Instead, I’ve had to navigate endless discourse in my life and relationships. It is entirely my fault. From the moment I laid eyes on Elyse, I knew that my feelings for her were dangerous and what they could cost me. I chose to pursue her anyway. Maybe it wasn’t as much a choice as it was an undeniable pull, but I couldn’t turn back now even if I wanted to. I love her. I love my friends. I just wish the two could exist in the same world.

That turmoil is what’s making this moment harder to celebrate. It’s also impossible to be happy about it when Elyse is working through so much pain. I hate fighting with her, and I hate the residual tension. I can only hope we’re on our way to communicating better and learning to understand one another.

The gym is opening January 14th and I want nothing more than my friends and girlfriends to mingle without trouble. I’m desperate for forgiveness and peace, because peace is something I’ve rarely felt throughout my life. I crave the comfort and quiet of life after revenge.

[sheepwithspecs]

I’ve had this concept in my head for a while now where my WoL accidentally wishes for Zenos to get a second chance at life and the dynamis (along with Stigma-4) fulfill this wish in Elysion. Zenos basically becomes a little dynamis guy who is conveniently stuck in UT thanks to his new body, forced to learn lessons about being a better person through interactions with WoL and the patrons of the Last Dregs.

I can’t even call it a redemption arc because unfortunately Eachna truly is his mirror and so she’s not going to be teaching him how to hold hands and feel guilt for his actions. Her main goal is to show him that life is more than mere existence, and that fleeting moment he was chasing for so long can be found in the company of like-minded people (dare she say... friends?)

Anyway if I’m going to read wolzenos I might as well write it myself. In the meantime have Eachna suffering because she’s too polite to tell Jammingway she doesn’t like carrots.

“Isn’t it a dream come true?” Jammingway gushed. “Even the Nibirun have settled in and made themselves at home. I even caught one laughing the other day—laughing! It’s better than I could have ever imagined; the place practically runs itself. Not that I need you taking that as another sign to hibernate,” they added, glancing accusingly at N-7000.

“Fret not. Hibernation is not within this unit’s near future.”

“I’m glad to hear it,” Eachna laughed. “All of it, really.” Turning, she looked again at the patrons enjoying their meals. The golden light blurred and she blinked in surprise, reaching up to find that tears were building at the corners of her eyes. She swallowed back the lump in her throat, heart pounding almost painfully in her chest.

Thanks to Meteion, she had suffered alongside these people. She had watched their destruction, felt their anguish, mourned their deaths. Their undying despair had wrenched her heart in twain more than once during her journey to the center of the dying sun. Some had inspired pity, others anger. But every last one of them had been in immeasurable pain. Even the Nibirun, who chose peaceful death over a life with no purpose, had been in pain.

To see them now, knowing where they had once been…. Jammingway was right: it was a dream come true. They deserved this second chance at life, to make right the wrongs which had led to their destruction. They deserved to learn and grow, to achieve happiness for its own sake. She turned her eyes to the vast star above the café, the wellspring of pain that had served as Metion’s nest. How many memories remained inside, trapped by the twisted dynamis of their own despair?

I want them all to have this second chance. Every last one of them.

“And anyway,” Jammingway prattled on, oblivious to her musings, “since you’re here, I thought we might have a picnic! I packed all the best foods the café has to offer. We have carrot soup, carrot salad, carrot juice, carrot cake—”

“Oh… erm, that’s… that’s great!” Eachna managed a smile, brows knitted in consternation. “I’m sure it’ll be delicious.”

“Unlike some annoying life-forms, this unit took allied unit Eachna’s satisfaction rate into account when choosing sustenance.”

“Hey! What are you saying?” Jammingway fumed. “Eachna loves carrots just as much as I do! Don’t you?”

“I don’t hate carrots, per se….”

“Allied unit Eachna’s average carrot consumption does not exceed one half of her nutritional intake. As such, this unit took the liberty of adding—” N-7000 trailed to a stop, hovering silently with one arm outstretched.

“With what!? Just what have you added?” Jammingway insisted, stomping their feet. “If you’ve squashed my carrot cake by crowding the basket, I’m going to be very cross!” 

[sableflynn]

Sable Sable, if you're able: I'd like some embarrassing secrets about your good guys. 💖

Hey no fair there's no pure rhymes for April so I can't give you a cute lil rhyme back! 😔 but anyway I love this question thanks for making me have to think about things!

Felicia is soooo bad with names. Specifically one time she spent an entire year sitting next to one girl in one of her intro classes, talking to her every class, working on assignments together, and just never knew her name. One time she and Elyse ran into her outside of school and Elyse was like oh Felicia you know her? Who is this? And Felicia was like 😬 and awkwardly fumbled to cover it up. Elyse never lets her live it down lol

Elyse is SO BAD with her lefts and rights. She has to do the L hand thing like every single time. Usually does it secretly to herself bc she doesn't want to look immature or whatever but she hates it. This is why she's never in charge of navigating whenever the crew goes anywhere.

Marcus absolutely had an "I'm gonna start a band" phase. Tried to learn guitar and drums. Kind of sucked at both of them but he can still strum a few basic chords on a guitar. He never wants to though bc it makes him feel like a pretentious ~anyway here's (fantasy version of) wonderwall~ type dude. Felicia likes to try to cajole him into playing at parties sometimes and sometimes he will!

Anna is so scared of horror stuff. Not so much the home invasion or slasher stuff, but supernatural, ghost stories? Someone could tell her the most basic "and then she untied the ribbon around her neck AND HER HEAD FELL OFF" ghost story and she'd keep a totally straight face and then sleep with the light on for a week after.

Kailo is so easygoing that very little embarrasses him, and he's a total open book. When he was ten he had a lil crush on a kid in his class and so for that kid's birthday he made him a painting of a bird. The kid looks at it and goes "Oh wow what a cool fish! Thanks!" in a pretty unconvincing tone and Kailo was too embarrassed to correct him. He still winces a bit when he thinks about it.

Darya once did several shots and then bet someone in a bar that she could do 300 squats. She fuckin nailed it and everyone was amazed and then two days later she ended up in the hospital from muscle breakdown and lowkey almost died. She's like fine now but it was embarrassing as hell.

also you didn't ask but when Volkan was 14 he had his hair grown out long and it was soooo bad. Not like the kind of long hair people can rock but genuinely just awkward teenager terrible long hair. I think he's destroyed any photographic evidence of it at this point bc it was so terrible.

[elencelebrindal]

Honest Opinion - Cygnus Hyoga (Hades)

If you’ve read the previous entry (Shiryu), I fixed it. I forgot to write his score at the beginning. Turns out, sleeping just 4 hours makes you goof a lot. 

Overall score (character, not looks): 9/10

Hades Chapter: Sanctuary

Overall score: 8/10

Can we talk for a moment of how Hyoga was introduced? Because it was flippin’ amazing (yes, I know I use this word too much, don’t come at me). This young man was happily (sort of) minding his own business in good old Siberia, and three seconds later BOOM! resurrected Silver Saints galore. And what did he do? Pffft, obviously, he threw away his coat and froze them all like death flavored popsicles.  I just liked that scene a lot.  And, I mean, at least Hyoga paid enough attention to hear the most important hint of the show (aka, they’re not really on Hades’ side). Not something too noticeable, especially taking into consideration Hyoga definitely didn’t know they were faking it, but he did listen. Good job, man. 

Though, the reason he didn’t get a perfect score, once again, it’s the stubbornness he showed, despite Athena clearly stating no other Saints should fight.  Not that I didn’t like Hyoga being ready to fight Shaina for what he believed in, in fact I kinda appreciated that scene, but it doesn’t make sense on a more realistic level. Again, if you’re a Saint, and you’re faithful to your deity, why would you disobey to an order coming from that same deity? So yeah, minus 2 points for this.

Well, for this and for him readily jumping in to stop two Athena Exclamations. But I’ve already talked too much about this, so let’s skip to the heartbreaking moment, uh?  Hyoga recognizing his master was one of the Specters, anyone? Or... Hyoga trying to stop his master from using the Athena Exclamation, while looking directly at him? Yeah, those two moments kind of destroyed me. There’s not much to see in the show, emotionally speaking, but I know Hyoga was distressed. I know how agonizing it was for him, to see the man who raised him (because let’s face it, there’s no way Camus just stuck to training without getting attached to a child) fight against the Gold Saints and claiming his mission was to get Athena’s head. 

Even worse, the scene at Hades’ castle.  I’m not saying it was one of the most upsetting scenes of this franchise (for Hyoga, not in general), but... you know, just seeing Hyoga destroying Zelos after witnessing that distorted frog beating a weakened Camus, there’s no going back. While he was in tears, let’s not forget about this. Because he saw Camus die. Again. In his arms.  Great, now I’m crying again, give me a second.

Hades Chapter: Inferno

Overall score: 10/10

You might be wondering, why the high score? He didn’t do anything this whole chapter!" Well, you might be right, but he didn’t do almost anything. And what he did, I was not yelling at the screen like a madman like I normally do with Seiya (who does too much and accomplishes nothi- I should really stop talking crap about him every time).

What I’m trying to say is: just like Shiryu, he unfortunately didn’t have a big role in this chapter. The key character in this wasn’t him, but Shun. BUT, just like Shiryu again, he had a big responsibility towards the end, and exceptionally fulfilled his role.  This being? Keeping Minos at bay, while Seiya and Shun crossed the Hyperdimension. Sure, it was kind of a useless gesture, because we know that Minos could have never crossed the Hyperdimension, but Hyoga didn’t know so he decided to fight against him. 

That fight was admittedly short, and I understand that, but it also made us know how powerful Hyoga really grew to be. Throughout the classic series we see Hyoga growing up and learning how to keep his weaknesses at bay, and it all ends in this series, with him fully honoring Camus’ memory.  What I always say is: even though Hyoga demonstrated his capabilities during the classic series (i.e. when he used the Aurora Execution), it’s here, it’s in Hades, that his true potential is shown; not because he wasn’t powerful before, but because he grew up even more and accepted that Camus wasn’t there anymore.  This is more of a “me analyzing a character” than “me having an opinion on a character”, but in this case I think these two things can go hand in hand. 

Anyway, Hyoga was able to slow Minos down enough for Seiya and Shun to reach their destination, enduring an awful amount of pain I might add, and actually waited for Shiryu.  He could have left straight away, after Minos died, but I appreciated a lot that he waited for Shiryu, thus showing us how much he believed in him to win his fight. This might be just me reading too much into the characters, because of course the plot needed Hyoga to be there, but you can’t tell me this blond young man right there didn’t believe in Shiryu.  Nah ah. 

Also, his reaction to Ikki almost killing is brother gets me every time. It’s just so desolate, I love it and I hate myself for loving it because it’s sad. 

Hades Chapter: Elysion

Overall score: 10/10

I don’t think I can say more about him than I said about Shiryu, because they literally did the same things.  He behaved properly, opposite to You-Know-Who, and fought to the best of his capabilities, without acting like a child. I feel like the entire Elysion chapter showed how much all of them grew up, and then there’s Seiya being a hopeless child (and not in a good way). 

Just like Shiryu, I was disappointed when he attacked Hades, because a Divine Cloth doesn’t give you enough strength to fight a major god like him, but he is a little bit more impulsive (yeah, he is, don’t give me the “ice cold prince” bullshit) so I’m not going to blame him too much.  Still gonna be disappointed, but I saw that coming a little bit more. And this is Saint Seiya, so what am I expecting. Logic? Nah. 

But, just like I said with Shiryu, his expression at the end, when Seiya unfortunately almost died was heart-wrenching. I thought I was finally done seeing him in tears, but nope. Still one more time, so my heart could suffer a last stab through it.  Great job, Saint Seiya!

[chaniters]

And the winner is...

Next part of @kruk-art‘s Awan Cormac series. 

Complex stories take a long time to plan!!!

Another hospital scene... 

Spoilers ahead for Rebirth

Previous part is here:  8 https://chaniters.tumblr.com/post/188183225024/blood-in-the-water

__________________________

Hospitals. Wards. Infirmaries. 

You hate them all.

Too sterile. Too familiar. 

Yet here you are, mind full of guilt, sitting by the bed, waiting for him to wake up. Your hand goes absently to the plate where the cookies are, fetching one two. 

Idle time is another one of your pet peeves, and thus you brought something to work on. The decryption programs you brought on your phone are top-notch coming directly from the farm and should work on anything, but the Loan Shark’s data-rod on Elyise has proved impervious so far. Still, you’re not giving up and there are a few more tricks to try. 

You’re almost sure it’s not an American encryption protocol, which only raises more questions as to the true extent of Hollow Ground’s connections. Whatever the case, they didn’t want this file to be seen which is all the more compelling reason to break in and see what’s inside.

You keep on trying though, each new variation of your protocols failing after a short while with a monotonous beep from the phone and the sound of crunchy chocolate cookies the only things letting you keep track of time. 

At least that’s so until…

“Are you going to leave some for me, jerk?”

You put down your phone, looking at him. His eyes are open, and he looks pale. Pale, but awake. 

The immediate wave of relief is so strong you feel you’re about to lose it. But you force yourself to keep it together.

“If you think you’re going to get one of MY cookies, you’re awfully mistaken. It’s going to be baby food from now on for you Marsha!” 

“Baby food? Yuck. I’m out of here!” he says trying to move up before stopping with a pained expression. The movement makes his mods go off, sending a zap towards the machine he’s attached to, which turns off and then reboots

“Watch it sparkles! Those things take a lot to reconnect if you break them... “ you sigh while  “You’re might be patched up but you’re still wounded.  Better get used to it too, you’ve got some horizontal time ahead of you”

“Ugh. Ook…  Maybe I’ll rest for a little bit after all” he relents. 

“That’s how things are going to be from now on. You’re staying there as long as you have to ”

“Who made you boss again?”

“Your mom. Also, she promised more cookies if I stop you from doing anything stupid”

“So you sold me out for chocolate chips?”

“They’re really good,” you say taking another. “Really really good” you add with your mouth full.

You monster…” he says with the hint of a smile.

“Yeah, I get that a lot. So, how long have you been awake?”

“Not sure. Didn’t notice you were in the room at first.”

“Do you know where you are?” you ask “Or what day it is?”

He ponders hard for a few moments examining the surroundings before answering “... The HQ?”

“That’s right. We’re at the infirmary”

“How long I was out though.”

“I’d say about two days, give or take.

“That’s insane. Where are the others?”

“Asleep I guess? It’s 3:00 am”

“Whaa… what are you doing here so late then?” he says narrowing his gaze, making you feel a bit uncomfortable. “I thought you hated hospitals...”

“I do. But I’ve managed so far” 

“Didn’t know you cared that much about me”. Bullseye, he got you there. 

“Don’t flatter yourself” you grunt. “It’s bold of you to assume I’ve got a life outside the hero gig anyways,” you say deflecting. “And this isn’t really a big deal. I get free food. And this is just part of your base, not a real -real- hospital anyways... I mean I could do this for any wounded ally” you add averting your gaze. The snort tells you he didn’t buy into that. 

It was a really bad lie, you’re usually better at this, of course, he knows you wouldn’t get into a hospital -even an infirmary- for just anyone. Well almost anyone, you know that now. Are you losing your touch? If you blush right now you’ll have to just kill yourself right here.

“Look, I’m taking turns with your mom, ok? That’s all! It’s really no big deal.” you sigh. “She left at midnight to get some sleep. She’ll be back in the morning.”

“So you met her?  can’t believe I missed that! What did she even say?”

“Oh uh… Not much… really. She seemed to like me I think?” In fact, she said a lot to you. About how Ricardo keeps talking about you and how he’s lucky to have such a good friend that you’d offer to stay for so long… and a whole LOAD of other stuff about Ortega that you didn’t know. “How are you feeling?”

“My chest hurts like hell. But I’m good at keeping up appearances,” he says with another pained smile. His voice sounds tired. Damn him and his unreadable mind… you couldn’t tell it hurt like that.

“Let’s fix that,” you say as you raise from the seat and start fiddling and adjusting the drips attached to his arm.

“Hey hey hey… What are you doing?” he asks nervously as he watches.

“Increasing the painkiller dosage?” you explain matter-of-factly

“But shouldn’t my doctor do that?”

“Fuck him”

“That’s a bit harsh”

You turn to look at him “He took you off painkillers because your sponsors bribed him so they can get a full diagnostic of your mods by the morning. They seem to think the drugs would mess that test’s accuracy.”

“... that does sound like something they’d do, the jerks...” he sighs. “What did you do?”

 “I dealt with it.”

“Dealt with it how?”

“I had him confess what he did, and then killed him”

He looks at you wide-eyed for a few seconds. Wow, he actually believes you could do that.

“Of course I didn’t kill him you asshole! That was a joke. He’ll come back eventually when it’s time to check up on you. I just gave him a time-out”

“Oooh…  It’s just you don’t tell that many jokes. And you were pretty convincing for a moment there. Did I tell you that you look very serious most of the time?”

“Idiot” you groan sitting reassuming your adjustments as he watches, a bit more relaxed now. “By the way I know what I’m doing. I’ve got training as a nurse”

“Really? Maybe I should hire you to do this more regularly. Didn’t know you had medical training”

“That’s me. Big box of surprises. Sadly, you couldn’t afford me,” you say with a smirk. He just snorts, which makes him hurt again. He’s an Idiot and you should probably stop telling him jokes. 

“Ok, doc… Can we move on to the part where you tell me how bad it is?” he says looking at his chest. “Or do we need the real doc for that?”

“Nah, I can do that… It’s really bad right now” you start “Nasty cuts. You went into intensive care, but you’re off now, your surgery was a complete success with no organ damage or permanent injuries. You still had blood transfusions twice from two of your cousins who were here when they brought you.  You’re going to have some new interesting scars. Overall, the consensus is that you’re going to be wearing your Charge suit as soon as they can spit you out of here. Your sponsors have prepared some media things for you while you recover, so you don’t lose the limelight, so you can expect cameras up your nose when they realize you’re awake.”

“Well that’s just…” he starts before trailing off.

“Grotesque? Horrible?”

“Business as usual really…” he says taking in a deep breath. 

“I’ll scare them off too if you want. Shouldn’t be hard.”

“How about I hire you to be my personal spook instead?”

“You don’t need to pay me for that,” you say as you finish adjusting the dosage “Also, you should be feeling better in a bit, and if you don’t we can go for a stronger dosage... Or I can even get the asshole to give you something stronger”

“Thanks, Awan” 

“It ‘s ok,” you say taking your seat again.

His gaze runs around the empty room, the dark corridor outside, and the digital clock by the bed. 3:17 AM. It’s pretty obvious it’s only the two of you right now. 

“Thanks for staying Awan. I know how much you hate hospitals”

“I do hate them a lot. But I told you it’s nothing”

“Not everyone would do this”

“I bet a lot of people would…”

“Nope. Only a really good friend would. “Would you be mad if I told you you’re my best friend ?”

“Wha…? Now you’re just being ridiculous…”

“Because you are my best friend. You know that right?”

“I...” you say averting your gaze. Fuck, you’re going to blush. You rub your face before looking back. 

“Oh. Now you’re mad” he grins. 

“You’re my best friend too, ok?… “ You’re staring right at him, the words somehow escaping your lips very quickly before you can take them back. Shitshitshitshit...Why does this keep happening around him?

He opens his mouth about to say something, before he simply closes it again, giving you a fond smirk before patting your hand next to the bed. He says nothing and neither do you.

It takes a while before he breaks the silence again. 

“Is Elyise alright?” he asks suddenly worried. 

“She’s fine.”

“I just had this feeling of… Did something happen to her?”

“I told you she’s fine. See for yourself” you say with a half-smile turning on the TV. “The news is still raging on about her”

Sure enough the news report show a picture of her at the large screen behind the reporter, with the headlines “Exclusive interview, Elyse”  She’s giving an interview, photo flashes showering her as she answers questions about her relationship with Ortega -which she deflects with some mistery -  and the mess that happened at the docks -which she also deflects-. You’ve got to discuss both of those with Ortega too.

Then a reporter asks her about the death of her mother… she breaks, starts tearing up… one of her PR guys says the interview is over and takes her away. The media is loving her, even if that breaks her apart. 

“Don’t you love Los Diablos Quality TV?” you ask sarcastically. 

“Ugh. That’s my life. I gave her a few hints but you can never be ready for questions like that.”

“What’s the deal between you two?” you ask curiously

“Ehrm… well, we talked a lot after that mess in Sunken Town… She was really sad and needed someone to dump it all on, and I kind of was there, so we started talking about losing parents… And her story was out of this world. We talked all night, and then I was going to go back home and she wanted me to stay and one thing led to another and…”

“Oh” 

“It’s not like that! I mean… Ugh… Crap, I guess it is like that.?

“Sound like it is” 

“But then our PR’s got involved and they loved it. They wanted to make a whole story arch about it, and I was going to say no, but she asked me to do it? I mean she said we should do it, you know, to get headlines”

“So there’s nothing serious going on?”

“Ehrm…” he seems a bit confused by the question. “I don’t know? No? Yes? Maybe?”

“Hey, it’s ok. It’s just me asking” 

“Yeah, I know. Truth is, I’ve got no idea. Never met anyone who’s lost as much as her. The things she endured… And I’d like to help her but I’m not sure if she’s in the right place now.  I guess we’ll have to see where it goes? You know how these things go with other heroes…”

You nod as if you knew what he was talking about, which you don’t. 

“Now with thy dumpster fire love life out of the way… could you….”

“Could I what?”

“Remind me how did I fuck up so bad as to end up here?”

“You don’t remember?” 

“Nope.”

“Not even…?”

“Not a clue pal. Nada.” Crap. “I guess it had to do with the docks mess that Elyise talked about?” 

“It does. What’s the last thing you recall?” you ask

“I think we were at some sort of event, right?”

“... yeah, we were. Hauswald fundraiser for their new facility. Reaper hosted it...That’s when it all started going downhill. You seriously don’t remember a thing after that?”

“Hmm... I think some of it’s coming back… but it’s blurry... “ he goes silent.

“Alright, I’ll try to keep it short…”

“Why? You told me I’m not going anywhere”

“... you just... listen”

___________________________

Hauswald Foundation Charity fundraiser dinner.

 Dodge to the left to avoid the punch… flip away from the kick… 

One of them thinks he has the advantage and attempts to trip you, but you time your jump correctly, and he misses. THey’re all off balance… Now’s the time to take the offensive! 

Leaping forward onto your three attackers, you grapple them all in your arms, lifting them as they scream in surprise before you slam them forward with all your strength. 

Excellent, you tell yourself as the three kids fall off onto the bouncy castle, giggling as they try to stand up and jump. The other kids cheer at you. They really love your Sidestep persona. You’re tempted to jump in yourself, but you’ve been using the bouncy castle far too long and some of the parents are starting to give you side-eye. Stupid rules say the castle is just for kids… Oh well, better quit while you’re ahead.

“Good try, you almost got me there!” You say behind your mask. You didn’t know what to expect when Ricardo asked you to make an appearance with the Hauswald kids, but now all you want to do is keep playing with them. They had this playground built so the permanent residents could spend time with their kids until the new facilities are built.  It doesn’t help that chronologically speaking, you’re probably not too far apart from their current age. 

The thought makes you ponder on how would it have been to have a normal childhood like them and the whole experience suddenly becomes both sad and alien. You only wish you could have…-

“Wow. You’re amazing with kids! What other secrets do you have?” Anathema says interrupting your thoughts.

“I’m a genetically modified monster created in a lab as a weapon designed to pass as a human and take over the world,” you say because the truth is often the better lie. You wave your arms in front of you, walking slowly to Annie, as a monster would. 

“I knew it. You’re one of them eeeevil Snake-people!”

“Ha! We prefer the term Sneeple. We’re not anything like snakes!. We just happen to be poisonous” you grin under the mask. 

“Sneeple” the children laugh pointing at you.  

“Oh no! You’ve got me!” you cry out. “But I will not go down easily! Prepare to feel my poisonous bite Anathema!”

“I’ll defeat the Sneeple guys!” Anathema says doing a slow-motion mock-punch at you. 

You fake a suitable slow-motion fall, and they all laugh it up. 

“Good job,” Anathema says offering a hand

“Giving it a 101%” you chuckle as you take his hand and he lifts you up.

“You should have kids of your own one day man. You’d be great at it”

“Let’s go back into the ceremony,” you say quickly. “I think we made our appearance long enough already,” you’re ignoring his comment and hoping he won’t ever mention anything as scary and confusing as that ever again. 

“Can’t wait for the big awards to be over?” 

“That’s the plan, I’m not staying a second longer than I have to”

“Man you could really use some decent PR for a change, get some sort of message to your fans. There’s a magazine saying you’re secretly a Japanese ninja, coming out all the way from Kyoto in search of the murderer of your father. It’s nuts. You should get closer to the people and get a real story going...”

“Hell no, no one’s getting closer to me. Also, I happen to like that story. I think I’ll sprinkle some Japanese when I talk in public from now on...”

“Wait, you speak Japanese?!”

“Of course I do. Now If only I could find my father’s killer…”

“You asshole!” he snorts following you back inside.” 

___________________________

“And without further ado, we move on to the event of the night,” Reaper says holding the mic with his good hand. He’s in a wheelchair, still with a cast arm, but the combination of an impossibly expensive Tuxedo being worn by a talking skeleton oddly makes him both look distinguished and larger than life. In an eldritch kind of way that is. His mind’s different, there’s a fire in it that you didn’t notice before. Fire. Like the Hospital burning. It’s not really very surprising that he’d get a whole new passion for rebuilding what he loves. 

“We hand over the Hauswald awards to those who have contributed the most in our fight against the epidemic of death that threatens our great nation!” he announces. “The panel of judges has spoken,” he says motioning to a group of people sitting on a large table by the podium, famous all of them, reporters, politicians, artists, writers, and philosophers founding members of the Hauswald along with Reaper himself. While the founder is dead, Amanda Hauswald, his only daughter is right there too, a young blockbuster actress in her 20’s that’s set to play Elyise in her upcoming film. She rises from her chair, adjusting her gorgeous silver velvet gown and climbs to the stage, to pass several envelopes to Reaper.

Reaper thanks her, and prepares to announce the winners. 

“Are you going to eat at all?” Ortega asks beside you, wearing his own white suit.

“The mask stays on”

“You could just lift up the lower part a bit” Anathema comments from the other side.

“The mask stays on” you repeat.

“But these are amazing!!” he says motioning to his plate

“That’s why I brought this,” you say tapping a large piece of Tupperware full of everything you could gather from the reception up to this point.

“You didn’t just bring that to…” Ortega looks at you appalled “You can’t… you can’t do that at  events like this!”

“Just watch me,” you say defiantly. “The mask stays on, and I take my food-to-go” You’re sick of being starved every time you get dragged into something like this. The only compromise you made was letting Anathema add last-minute bowtie to your suit, which looks oddly fitting for the occasion.

“Unbelievable… fine... Just keep it out of sight, and if anyone asks, I don’t know you” Ortega says giving up. 

“I still think someone leaked,” Steel tells Sentinel, from the other end of the table.”

“With half the police being corrupt, it’s not that hard for the Loan Shark to get leaks about us coming to arrest him anyways” Sentinel shoots back. “Or are you saying that one of us gave the raid away on purpose?”

Steel looks at you briefly, before answering. 

“No, no I didn’t mean that… But perhaps if we kept the intel only to the inner team, we could avoid it all spreading and…”

“Let it go, it’s not against you” Annie whispers “He just angry and It could have been anyone. Like Sentinel said, half the police’s on Hollow Ground’s payroll.”

“I know… I just wish he’d trust me a bit at least” you whisper back. “I was the one who came with the ledgers in the first place”

“I’ll remind him”

“Don’t. Let it be, it’s ok” you say looking at the other tables. The raid to arrest Lewie was a bust, he had been tipped off and the office had been whipped clean. Not even a trace of the furniture and the walls had been repainted. And his safe was gone. 

Your attention derails towards Elyise. She’s watching Reaper’s delivery from another table along with her own crew, investigators, photographers, and publicists. After the events with Mother, she’s become the main torchbearer to the Hauswald, possibly overshadowing Reaper himself, and the public relationship with Charge shun even more light over her rising star. Reaper’s provided her every resource, both in her hero duties and with an endless media bombardment that’s working to get her ahead in the hero-game fast. She doesn’t seem thrilled about her life being used and exposed this way, but you can’t really blame Reaper. She’s the perfect poster-child to lead the fight against the madness of loose hero-drugs trough the country, and he knows it. 

Reaper goes to announce awards for artists, media representatives, film-makers, and others. Right after regular every-day hero award, he moves on to the main event of the night. 

The hero awards. 

The Hauswald offers one of the most coveted awards for those who care about that kind of thing. This is the main reason Ortega insisted you be here if the Rangers win, he wants you to share it with them if they win, and he somehow managed to verbally outmaneuver you into coming along. Truth is everyone expects Elyise to win this year, but Ortega’s still hoping for a new trophy. 

The man must control some form of witchcraft to get you agreeing to come to something like this. Or perhaps you’re finding it harder and harder to look for excuses to keep your distance from him. The thought makes you shiver under your suit.

He takes pause as he reads the contents of the last envelope.

“Oh boy… Really?” he says, a boney hand rubbing his face. He looks back at the judges as if to double-check. They all nod at him, and he turns back to the audience. “ Well, this is going to be controversial. Alright, Light up the contenders!” he asks the organizers. 

Ortega stands straight, as Steel frowns when the lights come upon your table. Something similar is happening to your left, where Captain Glory and the Phoenix Rangers are also getting ready in case they win. Elyise’s not on her table surprisingly. You can see her walking to the side, having what looks like a really nasty discussion over her phone. That’d odd… 

One of her team took her chair, waiting to receive the Award for her if she happens to win. 

It takes forever before Reaper finally speaks, probably trying to be theatrical. 

“I am proud to announce the winner of this year’s award of the Hauswald, an individual who’s done more than anyone else to stop the scourge of power drugs. Someone who took it up to themselves to fight back against the endless spiral of death the corporations bring upon our beloved West Coast…”

You can see Ortega’s fists clenching as he looks completely tense. Captain Glory seems just as tense when Aurora takes his left hand, startling him before he smiles at her. They’re such a darn cute couple… 

You end up staring at Ortega’s hand, so close to yours. You can’t stop thinking about how his suit fits him like a glove and how he looks so darn…

You force your gaze to look elsewhere as fast as you can. 

Elyise’s standing by the sidelines, her phone discussion seems worsening and she looks really mad now. There are some stray thoughts coming from her. Someone wants her to do something… and she won’t have it. You can feel her anger. She feels... Threatened by something… ?

“Sadly, the winner couldn’t join us here for the event, but If they are listening, we hope this serves as the recognition they deserve, even if some of us don’t personally condone their methods of fighting the drug epidemic...” he goes on, prompting confusion through the room. 

“... the winner goes by many names, but lately, media has settled on one, and it’s rather a grim one, but then again, I can’t seriously call anyone out on those grounds”

Laughs at the joke… and suspense.

“This hero has single-handedly stopped the largest rings of drug dealers throughout the city! Thanks to them, hero-drug deaths have gone to their lower point in a decade! The award goes to … 

You can see Ortega biting his lip, and CAptain Glory inching at the tip of his seat.

“...Catastrofiend!”

There is a brief moment of silence amongst the crowd before everyone starts voicing their minds. Elyise looks at the stage confused,  she’s clearly not been paying attention at all and trying to catch up. 

“You can’t award a murderer!!!” someone cries out. 

“Shut up, he cleaned up the corporation’s mess in less than a month!” someone counters. The voices start getting heated from there, with two defined sides forming very quickly around the new vigilante, booing and cheering going over one another.  

Captain Glory and his team stand up at unison and start making for the door. 

“We’re leaving too,” Ortega says standing up, as does Anathema realizing the party’s over.

___________________________________

Rangers HQ, infirmary, present time.

“WHAT?!” Ortega looks at you confused. “They gave the prize to that murderer?!” 

“You know that’s the exact thing you said  after we got through the door” 

“Was Reaper out of his mind?”

“Ehh.. he was kind of all fired up, but out of his mind? No. Besides, he didn’t decide, the Hauswald board did. They’ regularly keep tabs on the price of the drugs, and when you crunch the numbers, there’s no question about it, the Catastrofiend killings have really put them on the run. They had graphs to prove it, not that anyone was hearing. Hero Drugs are almost impossible to buy in Los Diablos right now.

“But Catastrofiend’s… massacring people on the streets…!”

“Well, you know what they think of dealers at the Hauswald, especially after the old facility got burned down. They’re not even people to them anymore. And it’s been on the media since… a lot of people in the police force are speaking about how the Catastrofiend’s helping their job more than the rangers or anyone else in fact. Even the governor flirted with the idea of a pardon”

“That’s insane… What do they expect us to do? Start shooting dealers on the streets now? That award should’ve been Elyise’s”

“Rumor is that was the idea, but the board changed it without telling Reaper… They didn’t want to be seen as just pandering to whomever he chose. And perhaps they’re seeing Catastrofiend as the new Reaper”

“Yeah, back when he wasn’t suitable for kids.”

“Yeah,” you say leaning back on your chair.

He takes a few moments to digest it before speaking again. 

“I guess there’s more to the story? Or did Captain Glory and I start a brawl at the exit and that got me decked here?”

“Oh no. Those… “ you say drawing a circle with your finger chest. “... those came later. We got a call right after the event.”

“What was it?”

“Anonymous caller reported there was a huge shootout ongoing at the docks. They gave enough details to match what we found on the Loan Shark’s ledgers.”

“They found him? That’s great, so he didn’t escape after all!” he says. “Wait… so the Loan Shark did this?” he asks looking at his chest again “Fucking Lewie...”

“Lewie didn’t do this.”

“What? Then who?”

“We weren’t the first to arrive...” 

“They tipped him off again?”

“Catastrofiend was already there when we arrived,” you say grimacing. 

He stays silent, your words sinking in slowly. 

“Go on,” he says in the end.

________________________

My fanfics: https://chaniters.tumblr.com/post/181692759294/my-fanfiction-for-fallen-hero

DISCLAIMER: This is a work of fan fiction using characters and the setting of the Fallen Hero: Rebirth and upcoming Fallen Hero: Retribution games written by Malin Riden. I do not claim ownership of any characters from the Fallen Hero wold. These stories are a work of my imagination, and I do not ascribe them to the official story canon. These works are intended for entertainment outside the official storyline owned by the author. I am not profiting financially from the creation of these stories, and thank the author for her wonderful game/s, without which these works would not exist.

[donutcats]

🍂🌻💐 i was gonna hunt for something i didnt know about elyse but then i thout hey, hey, kal, soft kal thoughts, soft thoughts with a side of kal

Here’s some soft soft Kal thoughts coming right up.

🍂 Does your OC enjoy hugs? What do they do as a show of affection for: their friends, their family, their significant other(s) or for strangers? Over all what are they like with receiving affection from others?

He’s not against hugs, but he’s not normally one to ever really initiate a hug. If someone he cares for wants to hug him, he’s all for it. Don’t expect him to hug back every single time, but do expect a pat on the head or on the side to show that, yes he is enjoying this thank you. I think overall he enjoys and will accept affection from people but he doesn’t actively seek it out. 

He tries to remember to pick up tea for Darling, that way they’re never out whenever he drops by. He picks up scarves from the market whenever he notices Merek eyeing them. Kal tries to remember the small things, when he can. That’s the type of affection he tries to offer.

Kal is the guy that you can call at like 4am, waking him out of a dead sleep, because you need help, and he’ll be up and out the door before you can fully explain your situation. I think that’s also how he shows affection the most, just offering to protect and help people as much as he can.

🌻 What little things do they notice about people or the world around them that make them happy? What tiny little treasures do they find in the normal every day that makes the world seem a little brighter for them?

There’s a bird, some brown finch of some sort, that always finds it’s way into the front of his shop on warm days when the door is open. He leaves seeds out for it, in a tiny dish on the front counter, because watching it hop around and fly up to the rafters makes him smile.

He knows Merek loves flowers, and it was nothing Merek ever really talked about, but Kal noticed anyways, the way Merek would linger besides carts filled with fresh flowers and run his fingers over the petals. How he’d sometimes come back to the shop with a single flower and hand it to Kal with a large smile. It made something in his heart melt and fizzle and feel so fucking tender for this kid. So, Kal handmade flower boxes for every single window of their building, and even cleaned out a corner of their small backyard, and when he’s not busy with other things, he’ll gladly help Merek water the flower boxes and tend the little garden. It’s relaxing.

(any time Darling smiles, he considers it a small little treasure that brightens up any day.)

💐 How does your OC handle being unwell or forced to rest in bed? Who cares for them and in what ways? Does your OC enjoy being doted on or are they a terrible patient? Reversed: is your OC good at taking care of others who are ill or in need?

Kaladhar hates being sick with a passion. He’s the type that believes if you refuse to acknowledge being sick, it’ll just go away. He’s constantly proven wrong but one of these days. Kal is also the type to be constantly busy with something or other, so being sick is just, taking away from what he Could be doing. When he’s forced to stay in bed by either Merek or Darling, he grumbles about it for ages. Claiming he’s perfectly fine and would they just let him finish his work. (he is clearly not fine, and he is not allowed near a forge while dizzy and nauseous) 

He’s pretty good with taking care of others, but he’s a little bit of the tough love type. He’s not going to coddle and dote on you, but he also doesn’t believe in “suck it up.” He’s the only person who can suck it up and power through sjhgdjksdfs if he cares about you, then you bet your ass you’re staying in bed and taking medicine. 

[rosesandrightreasons-blog]

The Bachelor Season 23- The Women

So here’s my breakdown of every woman on the Bachelor this season (even the ones who went home night one) mostly just for my own expression, because no one else probably cares. They’ll be judged in the order in which they came out of the limos.

Demi- 23 years old, an interior designer. She’s from Texas, and she’s cute. She doesn’t seem quite mature enough for an engagement, but hey, my mom was 21 when she got married, so who knows? Her mom is in prison for embezzlement, which is... interesting. At least she’s not dodging that truth I guess. Her opening line for Colton is TMI and a little concerning, “I haven’t dated a virgin since I was twelve but I’m ready to give it another shot.” TWELVE??? Honey, I hope you didn’t date another guy after the age of 12 for multiple years. I don’t want to think about the implications of that statement otherwise. She takes Colton aside first at the cocktail party. She says she’s outdoorsy and has a pretty good conversation with Colton. People don’t seem crazy about her, but I think Colton likes her. She’ll probably last a while.

Tayshia- 28 years old, a phlebotomist (I had to google this, it’s someone in the medical field, kind of like a nurse, whose job is to draw blood for testing or donation). She’s from California, and she’s one of the most beautiful women in the whole world. Colton takes notice of this, and says, “Wow. She is GORGEOUS.” as she walks away after she gets out of the limo and they have a short interaction with some nice conversation. She makes a mini date in Tayshialand with carnival-like games for their one-on-one time, and they spend their time giggling and generally seeming to have fun. She’s beautiful and sweet and I think I saw her in some clips from the sneak peek, so I think she’ll make it fairly far into the competition, my guess is at least top 10.

Heather- 22 years old, no job listed. Well, technically her occupation is listed as “Never Been Kissed” which is not a job. Now, I don’t mind that she hasn’t had her first kiss at 22, that’s fine and not as weird as some people think it is. But, if you’ve never even kissed anyone, you can’t have been in a very serious relationship before, which signals to me that maybe you’re not ready to get married, and the Bachelor isn’t exactly a show void of kissing. And I wouldn’t want my first kiss to be with a guy who was kissing five other girls that night. But, you do you. Heather is from California. She seems a little flaky, but overall she appears to be a sweet girl and she’s pretty, so she’ll make it the first few weeks and then be eliminated by my guess.

Nicole- 25 years old, a social media coordinator. Very pretty, from Miami. She’s Cuban and woos Colton by speaking Spanish when she comes out of the limo. I really like Nicole. She comments in an interview that she thinks it’s distasteful that so many women are bringing up Colton’s virginity right off the bat like it’s something so huge to talk about. She’s a little nervous throughout the night because she doesn’t get a ton of time with Colton, but he gives her a rose and she gets the biggest smile on her face. I think she’ll last a few weeks, and then we’ll see. It’s hard to tell when I didn’t see much of their time together.

Caelynn- 23 years old, and she’s a pageant queen. She’s Miss North Carolina 2018 and was the runner-up for Miss America. Needless to say, she’s quite gorgeous, but plot twist- we later find out that she’s only lived in North Carolina for a year! She lived in Virginia like her whole life before that. This is totally unrelated to the Bachelor, but I feel like that shouldn’t be allowed. Did she move to NC just to win the pageant? I don’t get it. Regardless of her home, she seems like a nice person with a lot of good qualities. She connects with Colton during in their later conversation, and I really liked her entrance, where she wore a Miss North Carolina sash that she turned around to say Miss Underwood (it should say Mrs. but I’ll let it slide cause it was cute). She’s Colton’s first kiss of the season, and he’s the one who goes in for it. According to Chris Harrison, she and Colton are gonna get deep later in the season and she’s gonna bring about some important revelations for herself and Colton, so I’m very intrigued. It also seems hinted at that there might be a little bit of a past and some future drama between her and another contestant, Miss Alabama, from the pageant world. Yike. Anyway, she was the first rose other than the first impression rose, which is a good sign, so I think Caelynn will be around for quite a while, and will get a one-on-one date early on. 

Sydney- 27 years old, an NBA dancer. She’s from New York (she danced for the Knicks, y’all) and she’s beautiful. Apparently she gave up her job to come on the Bachelor (don’t they all? but I guess maybe this was a more permanent thing? My cousin was an NBA dancer and you’re pretty much done in your late 20′s so I guess maybe it was her last year? idk man). I really like Sydney, she seems super sweet. She has a string quartet during their one-on-one time and teaches Colton how to waltz. It’s cute and they share some laughs. Sydney doesn’t seem into any drama throughout the night, so I applaud her for that. I’d say she’ll last a few weeks, and probably get a one-on-one date at some point.

Elyse- 31 years old, a makeup artist. She’s from Alaska (interesting!) and she’s very pretty (what else is new?). She’s the only redhead on the show, and I love redheads so there’s that. But (I don’t want people to hate me for this but I gotta be honest y’all) I personally think she’s a little old for Colton. Not so much because I think a 5-year age difference is bad but because I don’t think it’s right for Colton, who fits better with someone closer to his own age since he’s still quite young. Her entrance isn’t much, she’s very nervous. But I still like her a lot. Her one-on-one time with Colton involves fishing in the pool, but for a hunk of salmon from like the supermarket, which is weird, but I like her anyway. She’ll last another week or two, and then I hope to see her on Paradise, where she belongs and will thrive!

Tahzjuan- 25 years old, some sort of business consultant. She’s pretty and she’s from Colorado like Colton! She makes a pun about her name but her entrance is nothing special. She’s super judgmental of all the other girls during all her interviews, and I am not here for it. Not a fan. Her time with Colton is cut super short by Interrupty McStealer (we’ll get to her...), which is unfortunate for her, but she was not nice about the other women, and I am not about women who tear down other women for petty reasons (like their outfits and Bachelor entrances...ugh). Anyway, she doesn’t get a rose, and I was okay with it. Other people were pretty broken up about it, but I’ve made my opinion clear. She was pissed she got kicked off and said she thought every other girl should go home before her... I’ll leave that open for interpretation. 

Cassie- 23 years old, a speech pathologist and grad student. She’s gorgeous, a natural beauty, and she’s from California. She’s totally my favorite, and she and Colton just seem like a really good match. She comes out of the limo with a cute little box full of fake butterflies and says she’s nervous and has all these butterflies, so she and Colton dump them out to get rid of them. It’s sweet and cute, and they’re very smiley, and as she’s walking away, he thoughtfully picks up a butterfly and tucks it into a pocket inside his suit jacket, with a cute little smile on his face. It was so adorable. Cassie waits patiently to talk to Colton, and during their conversation at the cocktail party, he seems to love that she’s a speech pathologist and works with kids to make a difference, and she teaches him some sign language. She teaches him the signs for “you’re cute” “rose” and “kiss”. (It kinda seems like Colton is gonna kiss her at this point but he doesn’t.) In the middle of their conversation, we see Colton smiling at her and then the show cuts to an interview of him saying that he is “smitten” with some of the women already, and then it cuts right back to him laughing with Cassie... we love. Cassie gets a rose, and I really think she’s a frontrunner. I’d love it if she won the whole thing, but I definitely think she’s at least a top four contender. 

Kirpa- 26 years old, a dental hygienist. She’s absolutely beautiful, and she is from California. She seems like a lovely girl with a really nice family (she’s one of the few people we saw an intro package for), but we just don’t see a ton of her this episode. I think I’m really going to like her later, she seems pretty genuine. My only moment of doubt came in her intro when she said she wanted to clean Colton’s teeth... maybe that’s like a romantic thing in the dental world, but to us normal people it’s just weird. Oh well. Kirpa got a rose, and I’m looking forward to getting to know a bit more about her. I’m not quite sure yet how far she’ll make it.

Caitlyn- 25 years old, a realtor. She’s pretty and she’s from Ontario, but I’m not a huge fan. She came out with a balloon cherry and popped it, and I’m just so sick of everyone making such a huge deal out of Colton’s virginity. He didn’t seem to love it as she walked away, but I could be persuaded to come around. Colton seemed to at least warm up to her in the short time they had, though she was also interrupted by the Usurper General. She tells the other girls about how she only got like a minute with him before he was stolen, but it doesn’t seem gossipy, just like she’s disappointed. And I’m on her side here. I actually think I don’t hate her, I just need people to let the virgin thing go. Anyway, she gets a rose later despite limited time, so I think Colton likes her, so she’ll probably hang around for a few weeks.

Courtney- 23 years old, a caterer. She’s very pretty, and she’s from Georgia. She makes a cliche and, honestly, distasteful, joke about him tasting a Georgia peach for the first time, another virginity joke, so I wasn’t loving her at first. She spends a lot of the night talking about girls stealing Colton’s time when she hasn’t spoken to him yet, but doesn’t really make an effort to go get him and talk to him, so I wasn’t loving it. She also made some uppity comments during the rose ceremony about how “if a girl in a sloth costume gets picked over me, I’m gonna be pissed.” (that was the gist, not sure of the exact wording.) Anyway, she does get a rose, so she shuts up, but I’m not loving Courtney. I don’t think she’ll be around super long, maybe a few weeks. Not winner or Bachelorette material.

Katie- 26 years old, a medical sales rep. She’s very pretty and is from the east coast, but moved to California to dance (but her job isn’t a dancer- I don’t quite get this). She does a “card trick” where she takes Colton’s V-Card (have I mentioned how much I hate these incessant jokes?), which I wasn’t a huge fan of, but her intro package was pretty good, even if it was like 95% her working out at a gym for... some reason. However, she had a really great conversation with Colton at the cocktail party about family and values, and she is the second woman he kisses that night. They both say they have a really good feeling about this, which is promising. Colton gives her the second rose at the rose ceremony, and I think she’ll be around for a while, and I think she’ll be one of his first one-on-one dates this season. I have a feeling she won’t win, but she’s one of the only contestants old enough to be a contender for the bachelorette, and she’d be great on BIP.

Alex D- 23 years old, a sloth. Of course, she’s not a real sloth and I’m sure that’s not her actual job (though I don’t what is), but she does come in a sloth costume, talking about how Colton likes to take things slow. I admire the women on this show who wear costumes, it’s brave. Anyway, she’s from Boston, and eventually the costume comes off when she talks to Colton at the cocktail party, but not before she hangs from a tree branch in the yard of the mansion. Once the suit is off, Alex is actually very cute and she is a very fast talker. She named the sloth Susette. Alex seems sweet and cute and she came as a sloth and honestly I have no idea why Colton doesn’t give her a rose. But he doesn’t. BIP? Please?

Onyeka- 24 years old, an IT risk consultant (I don’t know what that is but I’m dumb about computers and it sounds important and obviously techy so she’s probably pretty smart). She’s beautiful and from Texas, and Colton has trouble pronouncing her full name, even though it’s not that hard. Anyway, she’s pretty nice, but she’s drama. She takes charge and interrupts the Usurper for time with Colton, with the iconic line, “I heard you were drowning in bitches!” Which is dope, but she also confronts the Usurper one-on-one and is a little rude, but I mean, she’s not wrong about Catherine being inconsiderate and awful, but she lives for the gossip and drama, and will be going after anybody who missteps in any way (there’s always one of these on the Bachelor- the protector against those who “aren’t here for the right reasons”- can’t wait for Onyeka to break out that classic). She’ll stay for a while. Definitely gonna have a two-on-one with Catherine around week five or six, as per usual, and she’ll come out of part one, but I don’t know her well enough to judge how far she’ll make it after that. Paradise guarantee.

Erika- 25 years old, a recruiter. She’s gorgeous, and she’s from California. Her last name is McNutt, so she gives him a bag of nuts in her entrance, which Colton loves. She has to remind him of her name later, but that’s understandable seeing as she’s one of twenty beautiful blonde women he met in the span of about an hour. I’d probably trip up a few times too. She’s one of the first people to talk to him, and brings out the real questions right away, and they talk about why he’s a virgin. She’s impressed by his wanting to keep it special and respects his decision. They have a really nice conversation, actually, and she gets a rose at the end of the night. She’s got potential to make it for a while, but I don’t know enough to tell yet. She won’t win or anything, but could be a contender for Bachelorette if she makes it far enough, or BIP.

Hannah B- 23 years old, Miss Alabama 2018. Hannah B is probably the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen in my life, and she is, obviously, from Alabama. She’s also very real and genuine and incredibly sweet. I really love Hannah B so far. She and Colton just talk a little after she steps out of the limo, and they exchange “Roll Tide’s”. She gets a little worried throughout the night because she hasn’t talked to Colton yet, and just seems to be waiting it out to talk to him, but then she takes initiative and talks to him and it goes extremely well They talk about fears and vulnerability and insecurity and make a promise to always have real and deep talks, and they do a cute little handshake about it. They seem to have a truly genuine connection, and I love her and them. Definitely a frontrunner with a lot of potential. I predict she’ll be in the top four. If she were a little older, I’d predict that she would be a top contender for the Bachelorette, but the youngest Bachelorette to date was 25, so I’m not sure they’ll go that young.

Tracy- 31 years old, a wardrobe stylist from LA. I find this career ironic, as her dress was not something I would ever advise that someone wear (it was like a sequin skirt and a cutoff wife beater tank with no bra- I just didn’t get it, especially for someone who works in fashion, but you do you, I guess). She came in a cop car and called herself the fashion police. Again, I think 31 is a little old for Colton. Anyway, she steals Colton from the Usurper to color shoes and only gets him for like a minute before she steals him right back. She gets a rose at the end of the night. I think she’ll be gone next week, they don’t have much of a connection.

Angelique- 28 years old, a marketing salesperson. They have a short and not super meaningful conversation when she gets out of the limo, but she seems nice enough. She spends a few moments of the evening simply stating things that are obvious and going on on camera in interviews. We don’t hear her conversation with Colton, so it couldn’t have been that great. She’ll probably last another week or two. 

Devin- 23 years old, a broadcast journalist. She and Colton have a sweet but uneventful conversation during her entrance, and we see very little of her throughout the night, and we don’t see any further conversation between her and Colton. She does not receive a rose. She is devastated by this and cries a lot as the girls who got roses celebrate in the background. She’ll be on the women tell all and have lots of opinions despite having been there for less than 12 hours, and then we’ll never see her again. I am not broken up about it.

Revian- 24 years old, a nurse. She’s beautiful and tells Colton he’s a stud muffin (a phrase that should never be uttered out loud) in Mandarin. We see a tiny glimpse of her with Colton later but we don’t hear any of it. She does not get a rose.

Nina- 30 years old, a sales account manager. She’s blonde and beautiful and typical Bachelor gal material, but she gives no indication of being a real competitor this season. She speaks Croatian to Colton when she exits the limo and we don’t see much else from Nina. She gets a rose, but she’ll probably go home in a week, two tops.

Alex B- 29 years old, a dog rescuer. She’s pretty but looks like a little like a wax statue, just very non-emotive and seems fake personality-wise. Anyway, she says she’s sick and uses cue cards to communicate, like in Love Actually, but then she goes into the mansion and talks to the other girls (hoarsely, but she couldn’t talk to Colton for a minute?) and then Colton later. Apparently he got her a cup of tea from the producers which is super sweet, and because he’s Colton, he absolutely loves that she runs a dog rescue. This alone will take her through the competition for a few weeks, and then we’ll see.

Bri- 24 years old, a model. She’s pretty and here’s the best part- she’s actually from LA but faked an Australian accent to stand out. This is hilarious and the internet loves it and so do I. Anyway, Bri doesn’t really talk to Colton much that we see, but there’s a deleted scene where she tells him she’s not actually Australian, and he thought it was pretty funny, so I guess he likes her well enough. She gets a rose. She’ll hang around for a bit, two or three weeks would be my guess. Could definitely be an option for Paradise.

Laura- 26 years old, an accountant. Honestly, Laura is boring. I’m sure she’s lovely for like, a real person, but she wasn’t made for reality TV. The most significant thing about Laura in the whole episode is that she wears the same dress as Heather. She does not receive a rose.

Hannah G- 23 years old, a content creator. This Hannah is also from Alabama, and she’s also beautiful and great. It’s a good season for Hannah’s. Colton compliments her dress and she gives him an empty gift box, saying she got him his favorite brand of underwear (if you haven’t heard, it’s been made known that Colton prefers not to wear underwear). He loves the gift, and seems impressed by her. They connect extremely well when they talk later during the cocktail party. They talk and smile and when they both say they’re still a little nervous, Colton takes her hands and takes three deep, calming breaths like he always does with his mom, and they smile at each other like there’s some beautiful secret between them. Later in the night, he gives her the first impression rose. He says that she reminds him of home and makes him feel so comfortable and that she’s so easy to talk to. These are all Bachelor cliches, but they all mean the same thing: Hannah’s a frontrunner, right off the bat. He kisses her after giving her the rose, and says in an interview that he didn’t want to stop kissing her. They have good chemistry and she is equally as excited about him as he is about her. She’ll make it to the top four at least, but I can’t tell much beyond that now.

Annie- 23 years old, a financial associate. She’s very pretty and they talk a little about football, and we later see a small glimpse of a conversation of theirs, nothing to gawk at yet. But we’ll see where things go, because she does get a rose.

Jane- 26, a social worker. She’s beautiful and loves dogs, but it’s a little weird that she brings along a photoshopped and framed picture of hers and Colton’s dogs playing together. We don’t see much else from Jane all night, and she does not receive a rose.

Catherine- 26, a DJ, and a certified Bitch (this is not listed on the show, this is just the whole world’s opinion). A bachelor villain if I’ve ever known one. She’s from Ft. Lauderdale and she calls her dog her daughter, which I find very concerning. She looks like she’s had 8 rounds of plastic surgery in the last week, and she broke an unspoken Bachelor premiere rule: she did not wear an evening gown, but rather a very short red cocktail dress with long bell sleeves (it was actually a cute dress, but it’s supposed to be like floor length night one, everyone knows that). She literally GIVES COLTON HER DOG. Like really. For the duration of her time on the show, Colton will be taking care of her dog. She doesn’t really ask, she just says that’s his job now so like... okay. Anyway, she looks like a younger-ish version of Jennifer Coolidge, but Jennifer Coolidge is a fierce and wonderful woman and Catherine is just a self-obsessed and arrogant girl looking for attention. So, Catherine is the woman I’ve referenced before. She is the Usurper, Interrupty McStealer, You-Know-Who, whatever you want to call her. And here’s why: She steals Colton for conversations FOUR times. FOUR. Because she claims they haven’t had enough time. CATHERINE. YOU HAVE HAD MORE TIME THAN ANYONE ELSE HERE GET OFF YOUR HIGH HORSE AND GO AWAY. So, she keeps stealing him, and Onyeka confronts her about it and she gets defensive and judgy, and very fakely says she gets where she’s coming from. During this talk, she also utters the quote, “If you don’t have haters, you’re not doing something right.” I have so many questions. At this point, she’s stolen Colton 3 times. Moments after this conversation, she goes and steals Colton again. I can’t. She spends a lot of interview time criticizing the other women, and is 100% confident that she’s the best one there and that she’ll be getting a rose, even when there’s only one rose left and she hasn’t been called yet. Colton gives her a rose because the producers told him to (we all know this, don’t lie to yourselves), so she’ll stick around for some drama and inevitably go on a two-on-one with Onyeka, the Knight in Shining Right Reasons, and be sent home for being generally awful sometime around week 6. She’s evil. I know with every fiber of my being that she will be on Bachelor in Paradise.

Erin- 28 years old, her job is listed as Cinderella. She’s not like an actress at Disney World, she just comes in a beautiful horse drawn carriage and wears a stunning light blue dress. Erin is beautiful, and says she is looking for her Prince Charming, and leaves behind a shoe with Colton. It’s really cute, and we see them talking a bit later in the night, but despite her cute Disney references and the fact that I actually really like her, Erin does not receive a rose. Maybe I’ll see her again in paradise, but there’s only so much room on that Mexican beach.

Well, that’s all 30 women and all of my 30 opinions. Thanks to the zero people that will read this for letting me judge reality TV stars. To be clear: All these women are people with dignity and deserve to be treated with respect, this judgment is only a matter of who is good for Colton and who is good for TV. Except Catherine. She’s a straight-up bitch. Some people just aren’t nice, and she’s one of them. At least she loves her dog.

Colton, choose well. I hope it’s Cassie, but as of now, I’d be okay with either of the Hannah’s as well. Maybe I’m wrong about all this but I am obsessed with this show (can’t you tell) and it does have a bit of a pattern.

[dylanobrienisbatman]

Rewatch: Episode 1x10, I Am Become Death

Some of our best commentary from our rewatch!

Episode 1x10: AKA Raven Reyes is the most badass character ever in the history of time.

During the “previously on” it had Clarke banishing Murphy, and like... remind us again why anyone thought Murphy would be on Clarke’s side in s6??

Also a pre-episode ‘we hate Finn’ because it’s just too easy. 

Bellamy being constantly annoyed with Finn is a whole mood

THIS IS THE EPISODE WHERE MURPHY COMES BACK!! 

ALSO first ever Harper McIntyre appearance!!!! 

Jasper is a major dickhead in this episode wow 

Murphy, sweet asshole garbage son. 

Bri forgot Harper was dead for a minute, making us all sad. 

Finn saves Murphy from Bellamy... his one good moment this episode.... Well he has another later in the episode but whatever 

Bellamy is like “he claims to have been with the grounders” like... Bellamy... Baby. Do you SEE him? 

Clarke is like “he was tortured” babe... YOU banished him. 

Elyse had to google if fingernails grow back... what a weird show we watch y’all 

Clarke: “We get info out of him, and then we can kill him” Y’all: “John Murphy Clarke Griffin #1 Fan!!” 

The first ever Marper scene, where Jasper is a dick to Harper, and Monty is under a blanket the whole time.... true love 

Monty is the best, he has no problem calling Jasper out 

Jasper is an UBER dick

This is one of the best episodes of s1 honestly 

Bellamy is such a dick, we all love him. Our rude son. 

Bell is such a stressed out big bro when he finds out Octavia might be sick 

And then he’s a douche to Octavia, because our boy is nothing if not consistent 

Someone needs to hug Bellamy for like 4 straight days (we all volunteered, we’re gonna do it in shifts) 

A brief discussion of how s1/s2 are the only seasons where we liked Octavia 

Lincoln deserved better, boy shoulda just ran off to the sea, found Luna, and gotten away from his Garbage Fire Girlfriend 

BELLARKE DUMB FLIRTING WHY IS S1 GIVING US BELLARKE FEELS AGAIN 

Bellamy is such a grump, he just pops that dude in the face with the butt of that gun 

Clarke is such a badass in s1 

Raven should just punch Finn and leave him tbh, he’s such an ass 

Zeke needs to show up already, Raven needs love 

Clarke and Finn talk about how she knows him... you lied and cheated.. bruh she doesn’t know you that well. Thats sort of the point. 

Harper’s cute little headband, i love her. A little badass. 

Raven is such a badass, best character ever created hands down. 

We were all saying we wanted to be Raven when we grow up, but then Elyse mentioned she might be too in love with her to want to be here... which is a good point. 

Bellamy is such a NERD 

Blood dripping from the nose makes everyone think of Stranger Things. Bellamy is the new 011. 

Murphy is like “oh byegones bruh we good” you LIAR. YOU ARE DEF GONNA SUFFOCATE THAT KID LATER. 

Bellamy is sick, and wants no one to touch him... boy you need a hug more than ever rn 

Monty is a fucking SAVAGE. 

Raven is the most badass bitch in the whole fucking world. She sees Finn hesitate and is just like “Fuck it, ill do it myself” and then she gets sick and is like “welp, im gonna die, might as well make sure the job gets done lets do this im gonna trek through the woods bleeding from MY LITERAL EYEBALLS to get this done” LIKE HOLY FUCK. A MORE BADASS CHARACTER HAS NEVER EXISTED IN THE HISTORY OF TIME. 

Bellamy is a petty bitch, and as petty bitches ourselves, we love him 

The war drums make the whole scene where Raven is carrying the bomb to the bridge and setting it up even more intense 

Girl was ready to just BLOW UP to save everyone god what an ICON 

She really thought no one was gonna come for her baby girl you ARE THE MOST IMPORTANT CHARACTER I PROMISE 

Monty showing up to save the day and support Jasper even after he was a dick is the DEFINITION of a good friend moment

SO much nerd flirting, s1 Bellarke is prime. 

Bellamy is like “oh WAIT shes a NERD?!” 

Ohhh another mention of Mountain Men!!

RUN AWAY LINCOLN. RUN AWAY. 

Okay but Luna/Lincoln could have easily been a great couple 

Okay Clarke looks super jealous when Finn is carrying Raven into the camp, like... girl... dont be shitty. 

This love triangle is fucking stupid though. 

When will Finn just DIE though

Raven breaking up with Finn is such an iconic moment. 

WHERE IS ZEKE THOUGH WHERE 

Murphy pauses for just a SECOND when he’s about to kill Connor, like he doesn’t want to be a killer, but he does it anyway 

That moment on the original watch was EPIC. Like I believed him, and we were all just... proven so wrong

I mean... they did try to hang him. 

Sick Bellarke Flirting is so cute augh. S1 and S4 had the best bellarke content 

Kills: Grounders - 1 Murphy - 1 Attempts: 0

“How many times did we talk about hating Finn” Tally: 7 

Countdown to Finn’s Death: 17 days, 11 Episodes

How many times did we talk about Raven being the best character ever: 16

Countdown till Raven meets Zeke: 6 years 6 months and 5 days, 54 episodes.

@raven-reyes-of-sunshine @granger–danger

[ainchase]

Hey! I was browsing through your blog (like I do so often, I just love your content, especially your theories) and I've come across a post where you mentioned you wanted to write about Henir's inconsistency, multiverse and Herrscher vs Mad Paradox. What happened to that? Are you ever going to write it or is it so much that you are still working on it? Anyway, thanks for all these theories, hope with the upcoming content update, we can expect more theories from you

Ah sorry I did start writing but it was in a form of word vomit and not really organized... I didn’t want to ramble without having a clear point at the end and end with a question instead of a definite conclusion.I for one don’t believe that KoG actually has it all together, where all these tid bits of information fit together like a jigsaw puzzle to create one story because they have a history of retconning their story several times and I am under the impression that the reason why Elrianode epic quest didn’t have a voice over for the longest time is because they had to change the part about Rose in Elysion at the last minute because of her really bad popularity;

Like I have mentioned in Rose’s Source of the the Great Disaster post, Rose was supposed to, I believe, stop Elsword from restoring the El and warn him of the dangers that befell her own world because of this El

and if any of you remember, Rose finally CAUGHT UP with the El Search Party AT the Fortress of Solace (she was following behind them until now) and FOUGHT AGAINST SOLACE WITH THE EL SEARCH PARTY  

and walked into Solace’s memory together with Elsword

but we had to wait for EVER for the story update, and when it finally came out, Rose didn’t stop anybody, Elsword restored the El, and Rose was conveniently separated from the El Search Party she finally caught up with and did her own thing for several long quests until “casually” joining up with the El Search Party

and NO ONE WAS LIKE

HEY YOURE THAT BLONDE GIRL WE SAW THAT THE SOLACE’S FORTRESS YOU FOUGHT WITH SOLACE WITH US

like it was so underwhelming and not on the same page as all the hype they were creating with Rose when she first came out

^ none of this happened in Elysion, which I believe was SUPPOSED to happen

but Im under the impression that they scrapped the whole story because Rose’s popularity was so low, people were pretending she doesn’t exist and people hated KoG for forcing a Dungeon Fighter character join the canon plot and they knew they couldn’t go down that path so they had to lowkey everything with her to avoid incurring the wrath of Elsword players

so they probably got rid of the part where Rose stops Elsword, had to turn around the whole shit about how Rose was very antagonistic toward the El Search Party:

Solace to Rose in the Celestial Crossroads:

“Let me make an offer. If you help me, then I will help you achieve your goal”

help me = stop Elsword from entering (this was when Solace was telling Elsword to give up and go back if he wants to save his sister)

I’ll help you achieve your goal = you want to stop Elsword from restoring the El because it has brought disaster to your world so helping me means stopping Elsword

10-7 Dungeon Clear line:

Rose

재앙의 근원에 가장 가까운 사람이라고 생각해 그 흔적을 따라 가고 있어. 직접 만나지 못했지만 그 흔적만으로도 정말 재앙이라는 느낌이야…!!

I’ve been following him thinking that he’s the closest one to the source of disaster. I haven’t met him personally but just seeing the chaos in his wake I really do feel like he’s a disaster…!!

but yeah where is thiswhere is this any of this

NOWHERE.

I’m sorry I turned this ask into a “KoG backed out of the story and the hype they created because they got scared of all the Rose hate” post but yeah I’m just saying that everything on this blog just really me trying to make sense out of the shit they have created, like I’ve heard from credible sources that Transcendence update wasn’t even supposed to exist; they had to come up with 3rd job content but it wasn’t done but they are bound by Nexon’s way of doing things which includes having a huge major update every summer but 3rd job stuff was nowhere close to being completed for a release so they haphazardly mashed old content and slapped on Transcendence on it and released it (hence why a lot of the Transcendence portrait was really wonky quality, didnt even have full body image of them because they weren’t full body images in the beginning; they had to add that in later?)

but somehow I have weaved that into the overarching plot of Elsword I honestly dont know how I’ve managed that but sooooooooooooo uh

me trying to make sense out of Henir will be almost impossible because it’s full of inconsistencies like

1. how can Ain come out of a world of nothing as a something2. how does a realm of nothing exist3. how can you become a nothing to enter a world of nothing and then still have something to think “oh this is nice, I better tell everyone how great this is” and then come OUT of that world and pick up the physical form he had abandoned to enter the world of nothing

I can go on and on

I had a revelation but a lot of it makes no sense because KoG never bothered to think that deeply or at least never bothered to make everything clear for us so it will take some time... of thinking OTL

[shapeofbones]

02/04/22

so i've decided to start a stress free blog for thoughts, rants, projects, updates etc.

i've tried to start a blog for a long time but i've never succeeded bc i either made it so formal to the point where it was like writing personal essays, or i just ghosted it.

anyways i'm a high school junior and i'm pretty busy so this might become a monthly thing. i'm quite disorganized so i have thoughts scribbled all over the place (notion, notebooks, docs, discord) and i'm just adding to that collection.

but this is a stress-free environment so...!!

updates for 2022 so far

january 9-15: attended youngarts week! so phenomenal and i've talked a lot about this elsewhere so i'm not gonna ramble again. but definitely such a valuable community and place to grow. thank you nicole for giving me so much inspiration. <3 yay poetry i guess?!?! always thinking about wildness and radical suggestions too. ngl i felt intimidated by everyone's energy as an introvert but i met ppl who would randomly text me about kdramas and game pigeon so I LOVE UUU! started a skincare routine too, discreetly.

mid jan: caught up with school work mostly, spent lots of time studying for compsci... i need an A in that class... but i oddly have lots of free time to watch kdramas and play games? i've developed an unusual (but not suprising) addiction to candy crush and this water filtering game.

late jan: went to the cardiologist and luckily my heart isn't too bad but my blood cholesterol levels are abnormally high. gonna cry. watched true beauty like 3 more times and i fall in love with eunwoo every single time, smiling like a crazed gal. astro's songs are actually really good and i've been obsessed with eVeRy song for this entire month.

early feb: still not very busy, and that gives me chills because i feel like i should be dying at this point. told mr v that ap lang was the easiest (least time consuming) english class so far and he was shocked. finished our beloeved summer and started all of us are dead. i thought i'd hate zombie movies (first one and counting!) but i actually really like this one. i am trying to eat less sugar and it worked until today (feb 4) when i ate 6 girl scout cookies. birthday coming soon! means i'm 18 and will get a paypal account.

writing news so far: lynne thompson called! i'm working on publishing my chapbook manuscript and miye's doing the cover art yay!!! also wrote 2 poems, one's a ghazal. talking about brokenness and form with nicole. ran lumiere's contest and received 1500+ pieces. also wrote half of a flash fiction piece. did an interview about writing and youngarts with elyse! i also started thinking about future collection ideas (apologies, motion, abundance), and i'm really fascinated by the intersection between antithetical things (abundance vs. absence, endings vs. beginnings, loss vs. reunion, motion vs. static, wholness vs. brokenness) and how they complement each other more than repel.

random thoughts: gotta start studying for aps sometime soon // still thinking about crying in h mart, and crying // i should watch train to busan soon // my parents and sis are so obnoxiously noisy i can't bear it anymore... gives me chest pain // starting to like mitski more! // why am i so bad at reading? // eunwoo is so sexy and his voice/face is calming. calm polar bear vibes. // i feel like i'm gender fluid... really contemplating this these days.

looking forward:

i want to write a collection of poems as a personal project. not for publication though.

i want to go exploring around LA, especially korean-american imprints in this city like koreatown. wanna go out with some friends, old and new. like my band friends and maybe multi friends. learn and experience culture!

i wanna live a youtuber lifestyle (think minimalism, vegetarian, fashion revamping, makeup) but i think i'll save this till end of college apps next year.

gotta really make an ap study plan. there's 3 months left.

i'm getting $3,000 from youngarts and i want to use that well. really wanna travel but i don't think that's possible with covid. i'd buy lots of fashion items but also it seems like a waste.

[keyofjetwolf]

Jet Wolf Summarizes Act 47

The manga and I kind of hate each other. This is unfortunate, but still, I’m determined to come out of this with something. Rather than spend energy on a liveblog that’s increasingly negative, I’m reading each manga act (mostly) silently, and then writing up summaries at the end. I won’t pull my punches. There’s going to be criticism and snark about the manga, either wholesale or in details. If that isn’t a thing you feel like reading, please skip this post!

Nearly fifty of these, I’ve done now. I must be approaching the end, and for that, I am truly grateful. Still, you’d think with all that experience behind me, I’d simply be inured to the manga by now. And yet. AND FUCKING YET.

We pick back up with Usagi and Mamoru plummeting out of the sky after having been all shot and stuff. When Usagi’s face starts melting, Minako has a true honest to god freakout

Which I’d almost have a feeling about if it seemed like Usagi gave even a fraction of the same level of fucks, but since Minako isn’t Mamoru, that isn’t allowed.

But what about them being shot at the end of last issue, you ask? EXCELLENT QUESTION TO WHICH I HOPE YOU DIDN’T WANT AN ANSWER. It doesn’t come up again, and it’s only in this second read-through that I think it was supposed to have been an nightmare illusion? Which was intended to ensnare everyone forever I think, BUT EVERY SINGLE FUCKING SENSHI THEN HAD THE EXACT SAME GODDAMN NIGHTMARE

SEVEN INDIVIDUAL PEOPLE AND AMONG ALL OF THEM THERE IS NOT ONE THING ANY OF THEM FEAR MORE THAN WATCHING USAGI AND MAMORU DIE PLEASE PUNCH ME REPEATEDLY IN THE FACE UNTIL I EMBRACE SWEET OBLIVION

Cut to the cats, hanging out in Crown. Nobody cares about the cats, moving on.

TO MAMORU SMACKNG THE SHIT OUT OF MINAKO AND REI AND SOMEHOW NOT GETTING A FLAMING CHAIN THROUGH THE TORSO

Yes, gentle reader, it is Mamoru alone with the intestinal fortitude to break these mental shackles! This despite being routinely brainwashed by a box of Honey Smacks! And what is his go-to for saving all the others but to slap the shit out of them and save them from their own overblown ineffectual hysterics!

GIRL POWER

Mamoru then reminds everyone that they should be strong like him and help him protect the world, just in case you hadn’t QUITE lost every lunch you’d ever eaten in your lifetime. Inspired, Usagi remembers she’s the titular character, which in turn inspires the others.

By which I mean probably just Haruka, who takes the time to make sure we all know Usagi is the super specialist special person who gives her life meaning.

And gwooo was also there.

Not Michiru. Just gwooo.

Haruka’s feelings are so intense, she extends her secret telescopic arm to the horror of all and leads the Senshi in a bitchslap attack on Zirconia. Maybe it works? Maybe it doesn’t? I just watched Haruka develop an entire extra arm joint for no reason, I refuse to waste one more second of my life on this shit than is necessary. 

In the end, Usagi (just Usagi) winds up running through a mirror and confronts Nehellenia kind of. Hotaru and Chibs are there, I think, but they’re unconscious. No, they’re awake, No, they’re unconscious again. Things glowed! And shattered! And then shattered more! But not really! Maybe!

Meanwhile outside the mirror, Minako’s back to losing her shit again, and nobody is doing anything because they fucking can’t BREATHE unless Usagi’s within an eight foot radius I guess. I’m taking so much more appreciation for the girls in 124 right now, and if you think I’m not seriously considering marathoning the entire fucking anime once I’m done with the manga, you gravely underestimate me. (Group event? I’M LIKE 98% SERIOUS RIGHT NOW IF YOU’D LIKE TO POP IN AND OUT AT YOUR LEISURE OVER THE COURSE OF LIKE A WEEK WHILE I JUST FUCKING GLUT AND LIVESTREAM THE ENTIRE GODDAMN ANIME AS A SPECIAL POST-MANGA HEALING REWARD FOR MYSELF DON’T BE SHY.)

Anyway, all this sucks, except for this one amazing moment that I will clutch tight to my chest. Rei attacks the mirror with Flame Sniper! Minako uses Love and Beauty Shock! Ami tries Aqua Mirage! And Mako?

JUST UP AND FUCKING PUNCHES THE THING

AND IT WORKS

Even the manga can’t deny that Mako is all that is good in the world.

Maybe that kills her? Or not? Things shatter again and glow some more and then Usagi, Hotaru, and Chibs pop out of the mirror. Only everything else is still in darkness and ruin, leaving Usagi and Mamoru to simultaneously (OF FUCKING COURSE) conclude that Elysion is where all this shit is really going down. “We’re coming too!” the Senshi say, because if Usagi is out of regulation tetherball distance, they’ll just stand there and stare at each other blankly forever, and better death, honestly.

USAGI SAID FOR ABSOLUTELY NO RATIONAL OR LOGICAL REASON WHATSOFUCKING EVER

But then Chibs is all “But my horse boyfriend!” and Usagi’s like, “Mm, I see your point, okay,” and despite my best efforts, I find I am in fact still existing on this plane and reading the manga.

They all go then, because life is like Skyrim and once you know a place exists, you can just fast travel there whenever you want. It looks like Pegasus is dead! WE CAN ONLY FUCKING HOPE. Nehellenia’s not, though, because apparently there are still a few more chapters we can excruciatingly drag out of all this.

Maybe *I* was shot in the beginning and this is my nightmare. Come on, face, melt! Melt, god damn you!

[colewald]

I MET JENNA COLEMAN ON SUNDAY THE 24TH OF SEPTEMBER 2017 AND HERE IS HOW IT WENT DOWN

I don’t even know where to begin so I’m just gonna pick a spot.

So I woke up this morning, put on a face mask, had a real nice shower, did my face, put on my Clara cosplay,

had my sister take a few pictures of me (the ones you see here are the only good ones she took asdijkdas) then we left for Comic-con! I had been fine all morning but the car ride there was...mESSY. It didn’t really hit me that I was SERIOUSLY about to meet Jenna until that moment. I started crying and breathing really heavily and my lovely mum was like “STOP CRYIGN YOU’RE GONNA RUIN YOUR MAKEUP YOU HAVEN’T EVEN MET HER YET” but I just kept on freaking out like...I was SO nervous, I think I actually could’ve vomited in that moment. I’d been planning what I wanted to say to her for forever but I was worried that I would be too nervous to say anything to her and just end up making a fool of myself :( 

Anyway, we eventually arrived in the convention centre, got our tickets scanned, went in, looked for the autograph area AND GUYS.

JENNA WAS SITTING RIGHT THERE. RIGHT FUCKING THERE. There was no line where she was because one of her autograph sessions had just ended or was about to. I just started CRYING and literally as soon as I saw her, I walked away. Like, I couldn’t. My brother and my sister were like “oh my god!!!!!!” but I was like “nonononono I can’t, I can’t look at her, I’m not okay”. 

After a few minutes of dying, I realised people going up to Jenna and getting things signed so I was like “oH she must still be signing things” and my sister told me that I should go up now and meet her while the line was short af instead of go to her next session which was an hour later (which was my original plan). I just kept saying I couldn’t do it bUT THEN I JUST DECIDED “FUCK IT I’M DOING IT”. 

And....................................

I think my soul actually LEFT MY BODY. This was UNREAL. 

I went up to the table where she was doing autographs, picked the photo I wanted her to sign thEN WALKED IN FRONT OF HER. I WAS IN FRONT OF MS JENNA LOUISE COLEMAN, LOOKING RIGHT AT HER. AND THE VERY FIRST THING SHE SAID TO ME WAS “love your outfit!”!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I WAS FREAKING TF OUT ON THE INSIDE. I just said “thank you so much!!!!!” then she started signing my photo (I can’t believe I witnessed her write my name like bitchhhh). As she was signing, I was losing my mind. None of it felt real. Here’s how the whole conversation went:

Jenna: Love your outfit! (she did the cutest little point at me and smiled GOD)  Me: Thank you so much!!!!! Jenna: So what’s going on out there? What are we missing? Me: I honestly have no clue ahhaha (I’m actually such an embarrassment wow)  She was finishing up signing my photo then I finally worked up the courage to say something.

Me: I just wanted to say thank you so much for all that you do...because Clara Oswald means so much to me and she’s helped me through some really difficult times in my life and just thank you so much.(It took me like 9032328 years to get this all out though lmfao I was so nervous) Jenna: Thank you!!! (When I started talking, she LOOKED UP AND INTO MY EYES LIKE I SWEAR SHE WAS STARING INTO MY SOUL I WANTED TO DIE SHE WAS REALLY LISTENING TO ME BE A COMPLETE NERD AND HAD THE BIGGEST SMILE ON HER FACE, IT KILLED ME) Me: And I’ve also been completely obsessed with Victoria, you’re so talented I love you so much. Jenna: Aww, thank you. Thank you. (gUYS HER SMILE HAD ME DEAD. IT WAS SO GENUINE AND UGHHHHHHHHH I MISS IT)

Then I took my photo and thanked her again, started walking toward my brother and sister who watched the entire thing happen from afar, and I just started BAWLING. I was literally SHAKING. I couldn’t even speak properly. We were walking away and my sister was asking me what I said to her and everytime I started saying “I thanked her for-” I just cRIED EVEN MORE. IT WAS SO HARD FOR ME TO FUNCTION. 

After we sat down and I calmed down a little bit, I asked my sister if she could see us talking and she said yeah so I asked her what she looked like and she told me she was sMILING SO HARD and I CRIED AGAIN. Then I asked my brother if he could see us and he said YEP I SAW HE SMILING A LOT. It was just so much to take in.

My mum and my sister kept asking me to tell them exactly what I said to her but it’s 392092347 hours later and I still can’t tell them without crying lmaoooo. I just can’t say it out loud. It wasn’t everything I wanted to say (I have PLENTY I want to tell her but we don’t have all the time in the world, sadly). But you know what? I’m SO fucking proud of myself for getting even that much out. I was sooo emotional and nervous and I was so close to just keeping my mouth shut, collecting my photo, then saying thank you and walking away. But I thought ‘nope. I’m going to make the most of this moment’ and bam. I said that. I’m really really really happy I did. Maybe it doesn’t seem like I said much at all to some of you but I honestly think that I got the most important thing out.

ANYWAY, NEXT MY PHOTO WITH HER.

I started lining up an hour early for the photo session so I was pretty close to the front. I was dying but wHATEVER. There were A LOT of people lining up for her. I think it was such a massive line because (other than the fact that she’s Jenna Coleman, of course) she was only doing ONE photo op session and was only in Brisbane for ONE day (and is in Sydney for two, how could she do me this dirty). As soon as her session started, the line started moving VERY QUICKLY. Like, I was shocked at how quickly it was moving. It was incredibly rushed, I think because they tried to make sure everyone got their photo in the little time Jenna had.

I finally reached the photobooth and the poor, poor thing looked sooo exhausted, I wanted to give her a hug. 

There were a few people in front of me in line and at one point I saw the photographer signalling people to hurry up and walk up next to Jenna for the photo. It was like a “hi!” “hi” *pose* “bye!” thing I was liKE DAMN because I wanted to talk to her more. When it was finally my turn, idk what came over me but I pretty much screamed “HI!!!” with the biggest idiot smile on my face but I saw her eyes light up (I’m not delusional I swear to you) and she said “hi!” with that beautiful smile once again. I put my arm around her and SMILED SO BIG (as you can see in the photos above) IT’S EMBARRASSING. I walked away and said “thank you so much!!!!!!” and once I exited the booth, I was soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo happy like I felt so warm inside. Even though I only had two seconds with her, I didn’t care. ANY TIME I GET WITH HER IS GOOD FOR ME. 

Then about half an hour later, I went to collect my photo.................I......................strongly dislike how it turned out........................I’m not even kidding, I hate my smile and and even though I knew I’d look like a giant next to this smol bean, I was still so !?@#>@?!1!!!!!!!! when I saw it for the first time. I was kinda upset over it but SHUT UP ELYSE YOU MET JENNA COLEMAN AND THAT’S ALL THAT MATTERS. 

BUT SHE REALLY POINTED AT ME IN OUR PHOTO. A FEW MONTHS AGO I LITERALLY TWEETED THAT IF I EVER GOT THE CHANCE TO MEET HER I’D WANT HER TO DO DO THE ICONIC POINT. 

I’m honestly still so overwhelmed that that happened. Ughhh I love her.

NEXT WAS HER PANEL. 

SHE

IS

THE

CUTEST

THING

EVER

Y’ALL DON’T UNDERSTAND.

I’m not gonna go into details about what she said because she was asked a lot of questions she’d already answered in past cons (YES SHE REALLY TOLD THE STORY OF PETER’S ACCIDENTAL SHOWER AGAIN. IT WAS GLORIOUS) but shE’S TRULY DOWN-TO-EARTH AND LOVELY AND PRECIOUS. She was being so funny and kept making cute faces. I was laughing, dying, and almost cried at one point. It was such a fun little panel and she was talking and talking and I could have listened to her for days. Then the panel ended and I was just so content. 

I’m about to be such an overdramatic bi thc right now but seriously.....I’m not exaggerating when I say that meeting Jenna has been my DREAM for sooooo long. Meeting Jenna in Clara cosplay has been my ultimate dream. And that happened today. I told her what Clara Oswald meant to me (in short) and she listened to me and it was the best thing that ever happened to me. She really means the world to me and I’m so grateful for her and Clara Oswald. I still remember going through some really dark shit a few years ago then putting on Doctor Who and feeling so connected to Clara that I forgot about every bad thing in my life at that moment. I remember the first time I started doing a lil “research” on Jenna and seeing how smol, awkward, sweet, and hella stylish she was and she quickly became MY QUEEN. I adore everything about this woman. I adore her talent, her personality, her entire existence....my heart is just so full. 

Anyway, that’s my summary of today. It was such a good day. I really hope she comes again soon.

She’s also way prettier irl. I didn’t think that was possible buT

[thisgingerlovesbechloe]

Day 2: Summer Camp

Thanks to my awesome girlfriend @kaidence-elyse for helping me :) Summer Camp - Day 2 Bechloe Week "Dad, I don't get why you're making me go to this stupid camp! Why can't I just stay home? Aren't these things supposed to be for band geeks" Beca groaned. "Actually, no, Beca they are for everyone! It's to get you out of your room all summer and go outside, meet new people, do activities. Come on. It creates character," Beca's dad said enthusiastically. Beca rolled her eyes as he left the kitchen. When the doorbell rang, she ran to it before her dad could. She opened it to find Jesse standing there. "So, I got an urgent text for me to come save a damsel in distress," Jesse chuckled. "Whatever let's just go," and they made their way to Jesse's car. "So, coffee?" Jesse asked. "No way. My nerves are already shot," Beca said. "Oh come on! It won't be that bad. At least I'll be there too!" Jesse grinned. "Yeah, but I'll be stuck with preppy ass girls who don't care that I exist," Beca sighed. "Hey come on! I'll bet you'll win them over with your sarcastic humor and scowl" Jesse laughed while Beca smacked him on the back of his head. They pulled up to a diner to eat. As soon as Beca walked in she saw a beautiful redhead sitting with a blonde. She watched every movement the girl made not taking her eyes off of her. "Um, Beca," Jesse nudged her. "What?" Beca asked still staring at the redhead who was laughing at something the blonde girl had said. "Wanna wipe the drool off your chin? You're being super obvious," Jesse laughed. "Shut up!" Beca's cheeks burned. They sat down to eat and while Jesse was rambling on about some movie Beca couldn't help but watch the other girl. Her eyes were so blue and lit up every time she talked. The scar on her forehead was so cute. She wished she could ask the girl how she got it. "- and then the girl dies at the end can you believe that?" Jesse finished before stuffing his face with fries. "Um yeah. Unbelievable." Beca nodded pretending she knew what he was talking about. "Okay. Are you going to ask her for her number or should I do it for you?" Jesse smirked. "Don't be insane! There's no way that girl is straight. She's so perfect she wouldn't be into me even if she was gay." "Am I hearing you right? You're describing another human being as perfect? You hate everyone" Jesse laughed. "That's it I'm going to give her your number" he said as he stood up quickly. "Jesse get back here right now!" Beca yelled at him. As Jesse approached the table Beca covered her face not wanting to be in this situation at all. She looked up slightly and saw the ginger looking at her with a smile on her face. The girl gave Jesse a piece of paper before he made his way back to the table. Jesse grinned from ear to ear. "You're welcome" he handed her the paper. Chloe. What a perfect name. The next day Beca got everything packed and put her stuff in the trunk. While waiting for her dad, Jesse walked over. "Ready for an exciting summer?" Jesse laughed as Beca scowled at him. "There's the infamous scowl that will attract many new friends!" Beca hit him in the chest. "Oof" rubbed his chest. "Stop being a douche," Beca rolled her eyes. "So, did you text Chloe?" Jesse smirked. "Are you insane of course I didn't. She probably thinks I'm a freak" "I don't think so. After all she said you were cute" Jesse said while putting his bag in her dad's car. "She did?" Beca asked. "Yeah" he smiled. Beca's dad came out and they made their way to the camp. When they pulled up, there were several teens their age gathering together. Beca sighed loudly. "Come on, Beca. At least try to make friends and participate please?" Beca's dad said as Jesse and her got out of the car. "Yeah whatever" Beca rolled her eyes as she walked away from her dad. "Bye, honey!" He shouted loudly causing Beca to wince. Jesse tried to hold back a laugh but failed miserably. "Why is he so embarrassing?" Beca groaned. "Oh come on he's not that bad. At least your dad cares about you," he shrugged. As they walked up to the camp, Beca noticed all the girls and guys were going into separate groups. "This is going to blow" Beca grumbled. "See ya later" Jesse grinned. Beca sighed and sat on one of the chairs they had placed out. She got her headphones out to plug into her phone for the time being. As she was scrolling through her music, she felt the seat beside her move a bit. She looked up to see Chloe. “So, weren't gonna text me then?” Chloe’s smile was infectious. “Wow I didn't know you'd be here.” Beca said while shocked. “Well, maybe if you would have texted me you would've known.” Chloe winked while a blonde girl pulled her in another direction. “Text me now so I'll have your number!” Chloe called to her. Bec: so that chloe girl is at our camp Jess: omg really see this summer is going to rock little lady Bec: why the fuck do you talk like that.. anyway gotta go see who I'm rooming with and who my supervisor is. Jess: same. Peace out. How old could Chloe be? Beca thought. No way she's younger than seventeen. Beca turned around to look at who she was rooming with. Some girl named Fat Amy, Cynthia Rose and Stacie. Damn. No Chloe. "Everyone go to your bunks and unpack we will be having lunch at 12. You have an hour." Someone said through a megaphone. Beca was spinning in circles trying to find Cabin B. All of a sudden Jesse snuck up on her. Causing the small girl to jump. "Dude what the hell!" "Sorry I couldn't resist. Are you rooming with Chloe?" Jesse smirked. "No. Unfortunately. I'm not even sure how old she is." "Can't be older than 18 right?" Jesse asked his eyebrows furrowed searching through the crowd for red. "There she is!" Jesse shouted. Beca had been busy looking at her map but then her head shot up as soon as Jesse spotted her. Beca looked her up and down. She was standing next to the blonde she was with earlier. She was wearing a gray tank and pink gym shorts. She was also wearing a white hat with the camp name on it and a whistle around her neck. Jesse and Beca looked at each other. "Omg you're hot for teacher!" He laughed. "Okay first off she's not a teacher, and second you're stupid." Beca rolled her eyes. "Well this took an interesting turn. Have fun and text me all the details" Jesse said and left to find his cabin. After Beca found her cabin she dropped her stuff off and headed to eat. She was starving after all. "Where'd you think you're going? I'm coming with you!" She heard someone call after her. The girl was out of breath from running so she was bent over panting. "Names. Fat. Amy." She wiped the sweat off her palms and went to shook Beca's hand. "Beca" she said shaking the aussie’s hand. They started walking towards the cafeteria. Beca was beginning to realize Fat Amy is an interesting person. "So my dad thought this was a fat camp. Guess that makes things more fun now that it's not." "Yeah I'd think so." Beca mumbled. She was looking for the redhead. As they ate, Beca wasn't saying much just looking around. “Oi! So did you hear we got lucky and Chloe is our supervisor?” Amy asked. “No. I didn't hear that” she couldn't stop the grin forming. “So everyone it's time for our first activities. Which you'll be able to interact with the guys during this time. But no funny busy or may your vocal cords be ripped out by wolves!” Aubrey shouted. “So yeah, that's the one we could've ended up with” Amy said while Beca's eyes widened. “Everybody in the pool!” Yelled Chloe. Beca got out her headphones and sat down listening to music while everyone else swam. She glanced up after a moment and saw Chloe taking her towel off revealing her bikini. The girl then proceeded to apply sun screen. She watched as Aubury rubbed it onto Chloe's back where the red head couldn't reach. Beca's face flushed. The redheads eyes closed as the blonde rubbed her back. Then her eyes opened and stared at Beca then winked. “Hey short stack how's it going?” Beca jumped. “This is CR and Stacie. They're rooming with us. “Hey” Beca said trying not to focus her attention back on the redhead. “Well aren't you guys getting in the pool with me?” Stacie called out while stepping into it. “You guys go I'll catch up” Beca said. Then she grabbed her phone to shoot the ginger a text. B: So you didn’t tell me you were a counselor here. How old are you anyway? C: 18 and well you never really talked to me ;) xx B: guess that's true. C: you look hot in your black bikini ;) xx Beca gulped and her palms were getting sweaty. She watched Chloe strut towards the hot tub. C: well aren't you going to join me? xx Beca could not believe what was happening to her. She obviously wasn't going to turn this opportunity down though. So she got up and headed toward the hot tub. “Hey” Chloe's eyes twinkled. “Hi. I'm Beca by the way” Beca gave a small wave. “I know. Coming in?” Chloe arched an eyebrow Beca's breath hitched then she took the two steps down into the hot tub. Which felt extremely good. Chloe motioned her to sit down next to each other. “Are we allowed to do this? Like you know hang out? I mean since you're my counselor?” Beca asked curiously. “There's no rules saying we can't hang out. And we aren't doing anything” Chloe winked at she trailed her fingertips over Beca's arm causing the younger girl to shudder. Beca didn't know what to do with her hands so she continued to let the older girl travel her fingers all over Beca's body. Chloe then slid her hand on Beca's thigh up to the bottom of her bikini. Beca's eyes were closed shut her head falling back from the slow torture. As she felt Chloe cup her over her swimsuit she almost died. She hadn't been touched like this by a girl ever. And she needed more. She went to grab the back of Chloe's neck to bring her into a kiss. “Becs, wait.” Chloe's eyes were heavy. “We have to go somewhere private. Meet me in cabin C. That's mine.” Chloe got out and grabbed her things. Beca sat there shocked for a minute. Then she finally snapped out of it and all but ran to grab her stuff and meet the girl. She knocked on the door. Chloe let Beca in and then pushed her against the door after it shut. She leaned down and kissed Beca's lips gently. Beca sighed into the kiss and opened her mouth to deepen it. Beca's hands were rubbing the small of Chloe's back and Chloe had her fingers in the shorter girl's hair. Beca boldly moved forward eventually leading them to one of the beds. The back of Chloe's knees hit the bed and she sat down. Beca unhooked the top of the bikini. A huge smile appeared on her lips as she took in Chloe's bare chest. “You can do more than just stare,” Chloe whispered seductively. Beca's eyes flickered to Chloe's then back to Chloe's breasts. She began to massage one of them, and teased the nipple on the other. She then got brave and used her mouth. Chloe sighed out of pleasure. Then Chloe reached around and undid Beca's bikini causing it to fall to the ground. They both stared at each other for a moment. Then Beca slipped out of her bottoms and pulled Chloe's off her. Beca pushed the older girl down on the bed gently. She then straddled the redhead and leaned down to kiss her. There tongues danced in dominance and Beca was getting greedy, touching every inch of Chloe she could. She kissed her neck, her collarbone, her stomach. Then she got on her knees on the floor so she could taste Chloe's sweet spot. And she was one hundred percent certain it tasted really sweet. She swiped her tongue across the bundle of nerves which caused. Chloe to gasp and grip the sheets. Beca has never done this before but she could tell she was doing it right because Chloe was becoming a quivering mess. Beca swirled her tongue over and over and decided to add a finger. She could tell the redhead was starting to get close by how loud she was getting and how she would tighten her ab muscles. The brunette shoved a second finger in. All of a sudden there was a knock on the door. “Chloe, can I come in?” They heard Aubrey call. Beca smirked and shoved her fingers in and out fast. “I'm coming!” Chloe yelled out. “Oh, okay!” Aubrey yelled back. “Well, that was fun” Beca grinned. “Definitely,” Chloe panted. “Guess I’d better go..” Beca said putting her bikini back on. “Don't worry it's your turn next time” Chloe kissed the girl softly. Beca went out the back door toward her cabin. J: becaaaaw where are youu? B: sorry Jess. Been busy. J: think you're gonna like it here? B: this summer is gonna be awesome :) J: Wow an actual smiley face!