#anyway rant over im rlly mad about this

[princeofcyberpunk]

ok im fucking pissed off that they gave Unmei the literal stupidest dub name i have ever seen in my life but

BABY UNMEI SPOTTED ON THE WEBSITE

[cleverpaws]

one of these days i will drop an essay abt how there's actually no objectively correct characterization of any gen1 characters because they are, when in their most un-filtered state, supposed to be the streamers that play them, and to assume we know basically anything about who those people are is to miss the point of the social experiments entirely. and none of you are ready

[rei-does-stuff]

G5 haters are sooo annoying btw

[aroaceofthesea]

Not my info teacher sending us information about a summer camp we were invited to today when it started yesterday😭😭😂😂

[pumpkinsy0]

Can u do hcs of Steve and soda being purlys #1 opp (whether u ship stevepop or not )

of course!!!<33

•steve couldnt give less of a fuck WHAT curly and pony r doin he truly does not care, its soda whos dragging him along

•well thats what he WANTS u to think, he does care actually, not as much as soda but enough to be like “wtf is pony doing w curly”

•most of the time when one of em is flirting w the other, soda usually kinda looks over his shoulder and steve KNOWS hes looking at curly bc sodas eyes twitch a lil when hes mad

•when curly does something to rile soda up, steve isnt even upset hes just absolutely ASTONISHED at the it, like either curly has the balls or hes just really stupid and steve thinks its a mix of both (it is)

•sometimes steve and soda would be on a date but they see pony and curly off in the distance and they DONT want to just abandon their date so they r like, trying to focus on their date but they cant help but look over to see what pony and curly are doing

its just like “yea so then me and her-👀,,,yea,, so anyways we hung out”

•when theyre all at a party, steve and soda like to stay close to pony to make sure ponys ok and when curky comes over w like a drink or food or to just whisk pony away, they do NOT budge and pony just has to sneak off to curly while soda and steve r playing card games

•once, soda was looking into his and ponys shared dresser and noticed a shirt that was in there was a shirt curly was wearing literally a few days ago

•he aint even get mad or nothin, he took that shirt and steve and him used it as a sweat and oil rag for that day at the dx (which happened to be the busiest weekday)

•pony noticed but he couldnt say anything bc he wasnt rlly open about his relationship w curly so he would just glance at it frequently, and soda KNEW he was looking at it, he did feel a tad bit bad after that one

•steve was a lil dick and was askin if he was alright bc he was staring at something, what an ass

•when pony comes hime from hanging out w curly, soda cannot STAND the smell of curly at all, not bc he stinks rlly but bc it smells of curly undeniably, and hes just asking pony to take a shower 😭

•steve thinks soda being passionate about anything makes him pretty, so yes, he also finds soda ranting about how much he doesnt like pony near curly being attractive, he just choses to ignore the topic

•sometimes when curly wants to buy pony something (BUY not STEAL hes not completely broke all the time) soda and steve but in like “noooo ILL buy it for him” and curlys going “nono trust me mf I got this” and ponys zoning out just thinking “im getting double the snacks”

•when soda and steve accompany them at the drive in, they sit behind them so when curly tries that ‘yawning to put my hand around u, shit they just slap his arm midair and u just hear a loud ass SMACK and curly trying not to yelp😭

•its fine tho cause curly just puts his hand on ponys thigh and theres essentially nothing soda and steve can do but sit there seething

•steve and soda work at the dx im sure that when they see curlys rust bucket of a car, theyre going “r u SURE u wanna drive in that pony” absolutely dragging that car to hell and back just dissecting all the problems it has while curlys RIGHT there and they steve ends it off w “but hey man fuck it its ur life ig”

[krash-and-co]

hey krash, i wanted to reach out and say that i'm so sorry that you got such a hurtful reaction from one of the l&co servers for speaking up about something that genuinely needed to be addressed. i won't badmouth anyone in particular but this is not the first time this fandom has dogpiled someone over a misunderstanding, and when it happened to me i had severe anxiety over it for about a week even after it was resolved, and eventually left because of it. it left a pretty bad taste in my mouth for the fandom in general, so i mostly just stick to my small group of mutuals now lol. i wish this fandom truly was different from other fandoms, but this kind of thing is unfortunately inevitable once something reaches a certain level of popularity. but that certainly doesn't make it okay, and you didn't do anything to deserve the reaction you got. i hope you can feel peace about it soon, and i'm sorry again that it happened at all. 🫂

(please don't feel pressured to answer this if you'd rather the matter be left alone, i totally understand. i just wanted to send you an ask because i didn't know if you're comfortable with dms.)

hi im so sorry i forgot to answer!!! thank you so much this means so much to me. 💙💙💙 i read this for the first time when i was feeling pretty attacked and it really cheered me up <3

hmm other people have been telling me about how they got attacked in this fandom too. and maybe this shouldn't have surprised me as much as it did. but it's something fans never talk about and claim doesn’t exist, so i thought it didn’t. i was horribly fooled lol. as, uh, i am about to rant about; do you mind? u don’t have to read it, i won’t be offended, but halfway thru answering this ask it turned into a rant i wanted to release into the world lol, so sorry about that 😭😭😭

very important disclaimer!!! this is NOT about everyone. ABSOLUTELY NOT. most of you are absolutely amazing people, and i assure you if ur worried this is about you, it’s prob not lol

ANYWAYS!!!

im kind of feeling i was betrayed?? ig? i rlly believed everyone was so kind, and look what i know now. it genuinely seems like people are gaslighting themselves. how else do they only see our ‘harm?’ yeah, our fandom is known for being passionate, but saying we’re known for kindness is starting to make me sick. maybe we were, i know a lot of us still are, but throwing that out there in the middle of your hypocritical hate post seems like justification for the shit things people have been saying. you can say no wrong so long as you’re here. only people who don’t agree with you. so yeah, fuck krash and ljc and anyone else who doesn't agree!!! that totally shows how kind you are and how much you loved the fandom before we messed it up. nobodys visibly mad, cuz we're too scared to say shit!!!

i’ve seen too many examples of the contrary from the “victims,” wailing about how cruel we are the second they disagree with someone. (in a highly hypocritical manner, at that.) “everyone was so happy before this!” no, they weren’t, that’s why i brought it up. “stop bringing hate to this fandom! now let me fucking berate you!” do you even hear yourself? “nobody even cared before, we were all content!” we weren’t all content, we were just silent. it sometimes looks the same.

someone even declared they were leaving the fandom because ‘one person wanted to stop show saving efforts entirely because it traumatized them, and this is no longer a safe place.’ like, what? where did you even get that? for one, there were at least two of us posting together, and that’s just barely knowing anything about what’s happening. thats not even touching on how one of us (idk who the op of that post was talking about, it’s a 50/50 lol) made the fandom an unsafe place for our personal gain. what?

hella kind. hella safe on their part.

another said they saw only old fans agreeing about this so it’s just us being pissed about change. it’s us hating the show. me and ljc being upset about not being the only “big blogs” any more. our fandom is only for the elite, etc. fuck us. yet ljc is getting blackmailed. we’re getting hate replies. friends that try and help get attacked. misinformation spread. how did that even happen? we never once tried to hurt anyone; thank you to those who understand.

but to some, WE’RE the ones in the wrong.

do they SEE themselves? how hypocritical all of this is? or are their heads that far up in the ass of their petition and beloved fake idea of this fandom that they care about more than all of us?

now, this is where i add another “not everyone” message. not everyone is like this, this is not me saying i hate the petition or people who support it. hell, i signed the petition. twice. and once more from my mothers email.

i don’t regret the i love you posts i made, because i still do love this fandom, i am still absolutely here for the rest of yall. but DAMN if we weren’t hiding something under happy Save The Show, I Love Locknation! messages. perfectly smiling faces until they bite. i was surprised to see how many people did.

as if our previous problems weren’t enough, now it turned into this lol. no, that’s a lie, it didn’t. it already was, and i HATE THAT.

ig im kinda spoiled, i never really experienced hate like this from this fandom before. but now i know it happened BEFORE too, and that just pisses me off. it hurts coming from a group who says they love us. genuinely wacko (not the fun kind) behavior :[

i know this isn’t everyone’s experience, but it is mine, and enough others to make me wanna say this. and this is ofc me and @lucy-j-carlyle 's brand of hate, not yours. but it does happen and the constant chant that IT DOESN'T IT DOESNT IT DOESN'T isn't helping anyone. and now I know.

idk what im even saying anymore lol, sorry for ranting. what i mean to say is, thank you, and i wish things were better. and i love you kind people. im happy it’s most of you.

[daedalusdavinci]

(don't) ship ask: bruharvey

mybe other flavours of it as well

send me a ship and ill answer these questions depending on whether or not i ship it

based on the content of my blog i can understand why anyone might be under the impression that i actually cant fuckign stand bruharvey, and even think its the worst batman ship. so it may come as a surprise that i actually fucking love it

alksdfnsdf listen we ALL know. we all know. this blog is basically just a bruharv blog at this point i barely post anything else. there are so many different flavors of bruharv and im going to try and be coherent about this as much as possible. bear w me here

What made you ship it?

batman 1942 annual #14. EASY. it was one of the first 2f comics i ever read and one of the first COMICS i ever read. i was immediately obsessed with bruce and harveys friendship and the heartbreak of the whole story i LOVE a good divorced dynamic its just so. UGH. and the fact that in hush bruce states that part of the reason why he hesitates to pursue a relationship w selina is bc he doesnt want to lose her like harvey?? dark victory????? BTAS BRUHARV???? "sleep well my friend. wherever you are, whatever youve become, i will save you."!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! "good old bruce. hes never given up on me. hes always been my best friend."!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HOW AM I NOT SUPPOSED TO LOSE MY MIND OVER THEM!!!!!! sobbing crying screaming

from there it was just a quick descent into madness really

2. What are your favorite things about the ship?

i rlly like the variation in the different dynamics and how it can be literally heartbreaking in so many different ways! i also just love that theyre FRIENDS, that they still love each other despite everything, just the. AUGH. bruharv is the blueprint, you already know, but like adding in matches puts a spin of it thats just so fucking. bittersweet and hard to look away from its like bracing for a hit but its so fucking good you have to love them. harvey knows its bruce, and knowing hes trying like this but being unable to acknowledge it, just taking whatever you can, its just. hh. and w 2f not knowing its bruce, just growing attached to this man who reminds him so much of the first man he ever really loved, who is able to see him as he is and acknowledge it and love him anyway, and not have to compromise any of that for him!! and KNOWING its bruce, knowing that the realization is going to hurt 2f and bruce wants so bad to help him and be close to him but cant ever risk getting close enough to let him find out!!! and twobruce is like. augh. ive already ranted about them ive already obsessed youll just have to go read that bc this is already too long slkdjfnsdkf. i just kNOW bruce is still so important to 2f i know he loves him i know it. twobats is just hatefucking w an undercurrent of extreme angst on bruces side and harvbat is peak unhealthy delusional angsty hatefucking i love them theyre deranged

3. Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

2f is not a villain anymore than harv is they both have complex relationships w bruce and batman and morality and if you believe otherwise youre ableist <3 im not fucking joking. some of you really need to spend some time researching did bc you bought way too hard into the evil alter trope in a way that disturbs me deeply. get help.

also i think there should be more hatefucking and toxicity i love it when old men are bad people

[post-office-by-the-bay]

hi covey!!!!

i havent been able to respond and interact with all ur posts since im not home atm but im sitting in hotel room bed writing this rn so! i have found my way to your other account tho😈 so im gonna write a little rant i hope you dont mind (even tho thats kinda what the account is made for, i still feel weird doing it!!) so feel free to ignore i just reallt want rant!

also wanna start it off by saying i hope youve been doing well and the college stress isnt affecting you too much!!

okiiii so anyway its my birthday tofay 😜😜 and for my bday weekend we went to chicago since its pretty close to where i live and i thiight it would be fun but sometjkng about me is just that i hate being away from home like idk i just love my room so idk why i wanted to do thid for my bday but ANYWAY.

friday and saturday were oretty fun even tho its so cold out but ive had an overall good time! the obly downside is my DAD bro. i dont think hes ever experienced true happiness in hus life bc if any tiny bad thing happens he gets so MAD and for NO REASON. i try to stay happy but its literally such a mood killer like how am i supoosed to enjoy my time wjen ur over here bitching and complaing about not getting the corner booth like. get over pls shut up i wanna be happy.

and then today i thoight we were gonna go to this museum and then meet up with my brither to go to the sears/willis tower but it got completely changed and i was so confused and we didnt do anytbing k wanted to do that day. like i wanted kbbq as my bday dinner like it was the MAIN reason i wanted to go to chicaho but they switched uo and said it was too far away. like okay then… im like fine whatever just choose some place else bc idk what i want and i dont wanna decide and THEY KEPT ASKING ME AND BOTHERING ME LIKE PLS LEAVE ME ALONE. and then we were just walking around everywhere trying to fund a place to eat and i was getting annoyed so i just said olay i wanna go here, AND THEY JUSR GO SOMEWHERE ELSE EVEN THO THEY WERE ASKING ME WHERE I WANTED TO GO??? pls.. jusg make up ur mind. and then when we finally got to a place bc i was like yall im tired lets just go to fresking shake shack they starting bitching about the prices and i get we dont have a lot of money but it just made me feel so guilty??

anyway i felt way better bc me and my cousin started making fun of my dad so i felt 10x #wcousin😇

now im in the hotel room listening to my dad snore SO FREAKING LOUF LIKE HOW AM I GONNA SLEEP.

OKAY IM SO SORRY FOR WRITING SO MUCH LIKE YOU DO NOT HAVE TO RESD ALL THIS COVEY OMG

TLDR; birthday was rlly my dads rlly whiny but im chill now!

have a good day/night covey sorry writing so much😭😭

-🐌

beloved snail anon,

do not feel bad for ranting!! that's the whole point of this blog!! we just need to ignore the fact that i ignored it for so long lmao.

first and foremost, HAPPIEST OF (late) BIRTHDAYS TO YOU!! I KNOW YOUR DAD WAS BEING A BIT OF A BUMMER (kill all men) BUT YOU DESERVED TO HAVE THE BESTEST DAY AND IM SORRY HE TRIED TO TAKE THAT AWAY.

my dad is, from the sound of it, very similar to your dad. and i've grown to kinda just throw it back at him. it took years of warming up to it, but now i just treat him the way he treats us and he shuts up real real quick, ya know?? anyways, im so so sorry that he was being sucky (again kill all men) and you totally didn't deserve that!! wishing you a better birthday for next year!!

all my love,

covey 𐙚⊹ ࣪ ˖

[yfmconfessions2]

honestly, screw ray's new content 😭 "takes a long time for me to make the graphics" don't you use ai? what. and to be honest, it's kinda boring too + ray's shorts that were like equals 3 were the reason why i started to like shorts a bit. god damn it why did he stop. "you should support a creator when they switch to doing content they're comfortable with" when the new content has ai i think i will refuse! ☺️ basing off the last post, god damn wish i was positive as you 😭

NO HONESTLY I FEEL THE SAME ASS WAY. THE FUNNY SHORTS ARE SO HIM, AND NOW THERES LIKE NO PASSION AND CHARACTER???? HE SAID HIMSELF, "IF YOU WANT A CAREER IN ENTERTAINMENT, YOU NEED TO HAVE SOME KIND OF CONSISTENCY", AND HES KNOWN FOR DOING COMEDIC THINGS. he's been doing it so long, and hes rlly good at it, but then he gradually went from reviewing funny social media videos, to talking about social media dramas, to real life crime cases. ray'sold shorts genuinely brighten my day but now they make me sad knowing what he is now :( like it still says in his about me that hes a comedian??? like???? is the comedian in the room with us rn???? ill be honest im not TOO mad abt the ai thing, like i understand why, theres no way a real artist could provide all those customized images every day, but like... AI ART LOOKS WEIRD AND GOOGLE IMAGES WOULD BE FINE?? i just hope things turn around soon... the 2022 era when ray was like enthusiastic abt yfm and did funny goofy shorts was awesome ☹️

anyways rant over do yall think puff likes nose boops

[blackvail22]

i cannot help but become irritated when im near her. i know that is a toxic thing to say; i know its unhealthy for me. it just... happens

i tried to have a good day today because i was going out with my sister and b-i-l for my birthday and eating later with my whole immediate family. i did have fun! we bowled for 2hrs, went to a japanese bakery and got my birthday cake n some more treats, and i went to get milk tea.

everything was fine until i was near my mom.

i dont know what it is about her, but whenever im away from her for hours n i come back home, it just.... i just get so irritated.

i try to not talk so i dont get her irritated, but that always makes her go "aww, is someone mad?" or "why are you so pissed off for no reason" or gives me a look that shows shes seeing red.

on the way home from dinner, my parents were talking about a house that someone moved out of; they each gave different addresses for the house. my mom *insisted* she was correct, and--even though my dad literally said he may be wrong n doesnt rlly care abt the address--kept arguing that my dad was wrong and upset.

one thing abt my mom that i despise: EVERY SINGLE TIME you "irritate her soul" she will rant abt how much she hates you and at the end WITHOUT FAIL says "fucking trash bag bitch". what comes after that depends on the person... for me she'll say "fucking trash bag bitch, youre so fucking [r slur]" and for my dad she'll say "fucking trash bag bitch, child molesting mother fucker". there is one thats universal though which is "fucking trash bag bitch, i hope you fucking die"

oh! another thing abt that, SHE WILL LITERALLY SAY THAT ABT RANDOM PPL SHE SEES ON THE STREET AND ARE MINDING THEIR FUCKING BUSINESS

anyway, back to my story! while she was arguing w my dad (after telling me theyre not arguing) she said her signature line i stated above.

my dad went into the gas station after she said that to him and heres where i come in!

she was ranting to me "your dad get so upset over every little thing"

i said "well, you do that too"

she said "no he's just mad cuz he's wrong....he never fucking listens..."

*dad comes back to the car with 3 cigarette packs instead of 2 (my dad went into the gas station 4 my mom)*

"...again, he never fucking listens! he just hears what he wants to hear"

"yeah, i dont rlly want to listen to you rn. plus, all you said was 'cigarettes' you didnt say an amount"

"yes i did! i said '2 cigarettes'"

me: "no u only said 'cigarettes'"

mom: "dad, why are you mad?"

"because you keep going on abt something that doesnt matter to me!"

"no, its because youre wrong. youre all mad because youre wrong"

"no im not!"

*i look at the house through maps and tell them the correct address*

mom: "[my first name] shut the fuck up before you become homeless because youre getting real close"

dad: "stop fucking saying that! youre not kicking my daughter outm regardless, shes never gonna be fucking homeless"

*we get home*

dad: "i forgot to get smth to drink because of you"

mom: "yeah, you can get one of those little bottles [of alcohol] like you do every night" (my dad is a recovered alcoholic)

i told her she was irritating 🧍

she said "move tf out then"

i said "im trying to" (because i am)

im sitting in my room now wanting to scream, cry, fight. i feel so fucking .... tense. i feel tense. im so tired of having to deal with my mom. as much as living w a man by myself (even my dad) scared tf out of me, im so tempted to move into his tiny ass apartment and sleep in the living room. i cant live her anymore!!!

me n my friend have been talking abt getting an apartment/go apartment searching after i recover from my procedure that im having next week.

i need to room w her. i need to live w someone that doesnt fucking hate me! i need to save up every paycheck im having. even tho i go on a vacation end-october, im moving out and im going low-contact w my mom. i cannot deal w her anymore. i will get my license in a month/month-half time. im determined. i need to do anything to get away from her

[addoration]

some people are impossible to discuss/debate with………. rlly should have learnt that by now!!!!!!! rant under cut

spent the evening ‘talking’ with my mother’s friend and got progressively irritated by her.

firstly… she would constantly interrupt me, making me lose my train of thought, and also change the subject away from what i began talking about… and then talk and talk while i listened and never gave me pause to talk myself

secondly, she said some islamophobic things which made me so uncomfortable!! she’s french so she talked about how the state and church are separate, which yes i agree with, but then she was saying how because of that, hijabis shouldn’t wear their hijabs in schools etc…… which was soooo problematic for obvious reasons.

THEN when i tried to tell her that she’s being islamophobic, she made it all about sexism!!!!!!! how it’s men oppressing women and making them wear their headscarves!!!!!!!! and i was like…. well maybe sometimes that happens but that’s such a generalisation and so so harmful to think!!!! it’s the woman’s choice!!!

btw this conversation started because i was talking (to my mum!!! not her!!!) about trans rights in the uk and she butted in. so don’t even ask me how we got on to religion in the first place.

she was being very negative on religion as a whole, catholics, muslims,etc, and i said “so it’s organised and bastardised religion that you dislike, because yes me too” and she said no, it’s religion on the whole that she disagrees with….. again, soo problematic…….

anyway back on the trans matter. i said that AT THE MOMENT, trans ppl are some of the more vulnerable people in the queer community, and

1) she said “you shouldn’t victimise yourself” which???????? made me so mad?????? firstly because i AM a victim of transphobia, as are most trans ppl, and secondly because whether or not we’re fighting against transphobia or lying down and taking it, the statement is true and not meant to victimise. we ARE one of the most vulnerable categories atm. that’s just… fact. where’s the victimisation???????

2) she made it abt sexism. she turned the conversation into one abt sexism. and i was like “im not dismissing the struggles of women and misogyny and sexism, i mean look at what trans women especially face!! but that’s not what is being discussed right now” and then she basically……. pitted misogyny and transphobia against each other. she straight up said, quote, “sexism is worse” and i was like????????? you legit canNOT make this a competition of who has it worse. wtf.

she kept saying “oh ive engaged so much with the queer community” and then would talk about how when she goes to back rooms in paris, she feels unsafe around gay men and how she’s seen how gay men and lesbians “hate each other” which???? ok……. i have no experience of gay spaces outside of the internet really tbh, especially outside the uk, so i won’t say she’s lying, but….. that’s got to be such a generalisation that she came up with because she witnessed some stuff maybe years and years ago. because for sure that’s not the vibe i get.

when i brought up that i personally thought that it was bisexuals who get most flack, she was like “what?! no!” and i was like “well im glad that it’s not your experience but i personally have witnessed so much biphobia from the cishets and the queers” and she was like “no, i think you’re wrong.” which, fine, she’s entitled to her opinion, but….. god it made me foam at the mouth in anger!!

godddd just…… everything she said wound me up. i never even invited her into the conversation hhhhhhh.

lots of bad takes from her tonight but the one that got me most angry was when she said sexism is a worse issue than transphobia. like. sure. let’s go making a “who has it worse” contest of discrimination now, because that’s fun…… ffs.

anyway, rant over, goodnight.

[astrxealis]

hhdiebdks reciting in class quite often today heck yeah but some of it was like. in homeroom. abt video games so. WIDBWKBS!?!?(#@&#£@

[stagcharmed-a]

movies rlly did sirius dirty with the ‘nice one james’

[subterra-elico]

im back so its time for me to rant abt how my favourite characters deserved so much better.

anyway day ?????? of me still being mad that they made spectra's motive be that he wants "power for power's sake". That's Not A Motive You Give To A Character You Plan To Make Redeemable. bc like its obvs they planned to redeem him from the start. and i love spectra they're one of my absolute favourite characters ever but like UGGHHHH and his lack of motive ruins both mira's writing and gus' writing and eughghghgh.

they could have so done something w the fact that he wanted to take over vestal at the beginning like idk. whenever they showed keith before he became spectra he's so nice and they dont rlly give any hints of "oh maybe he is a bit messed up actually" apart from that one scene w hydranoid but there's like. 0 context to that?? he's just standing there. menacingly. like why would that happening to hydranoid motivate him to become more powerful???

idk i see spectra as a character who was supposed to be written to be able to be redeemed so i try and find ways to make him (and gus!!) more sympathetic??? but the writers just went "oh yea this is spectra he is cruel and evil and the worst, but because he's mira's brother he's redeemable and did nothing wrong, thats how character development works right?"

im rambling here as i so often do when my favs have so much squandered potential im sorry gjdkfs but like!! idk they could have made it so his taking over vestal thing originally was him being like "wow the ppl ruling this place sucks someone should rlly do something about it" but then they could have made it so like he was like "oh im the only one who can do this" and gave him his god complex and make him believe that everything he is doing is right bc y'know. he is a bit messed up and like power corrupts ppl.

dont get me wrong i adore evil spectra he's an absolute joy to watch on screen and i love villains who's motive is "just because i can". but it doesn't work!! when ur character!!! is supposed to be able to be redeemed!!!

[dreaminginvelaris]

hiii random question but do you still hate elain?

hi anon <3

this turned into a rant lmao but i’ve been needing to get this out i think, i’d been thinking a lot about my feelings towards elain for a while now.

i’ve got surprising news for you.

no, i do not hate elain anymore.

idk how it happed tbh. i think it was a discord discussion i had where i honestly just felt bad for elain and how she was and still is being treated.

dont get me wrong, i cant say i like her—not yet at least. but i’ve been sympathizing with her a lot. i dont like the way nesta treats her. i dont like the way azriel treats her. and i dont like the way feyre treats her.

shes not a baby or a fragile little thing. shes a grown female who has shown she wants to do more than what shes just been designated too. but the ppl around her stifle her and tbh im glad rhys called that out to feyre. nesta and azriel need to back the fuck off and let her try to help when she can. not immediately say no as if its their fucking right. i used to think elain was weak for that, for not having a back bone but now im just like how would be able to stand up to them when all her life shes been surrounded by people confining her into a box. it’s honestly infuriating when i think about it.

im still mad at elain for what she did to feyre in acotar. i still believe elain hasnt apologized bc to me an acknowledgment of her past behavior is not an apology. but i can also acknowledge that shes been kind to feyre since and yk isnt a terrible person to her. i would say my stance on elain is pretty neutral now and im just gonna wait until her story gets written to see where i finally stand with her.

i do think she treated nesta horribly when she visited her in the house of wind. expecting nesta to get better in what? 2 weeks? not elains finest moment. do i think elain should have tried harder to help nesta when she was spiraling? absolutely. but i also dont think elain should have forced herself to help someone that didn’t want help, to stay near someone who just constantly throws abusive words at her and belittles her. elain took some space from nesta, rightfully so and i cant blame her for it. especially when nesta just kept claiming elain chose feyre over her like girl please.

i want elain to flourish. i want elain to gain a better personality. i want elain to have a purpose. i want elain to stand up to her overbearing family and friends. i want elain to do better in the way she behaves with her sisters. i want elain to apologize for her misbehaviors of the past. i want elain to find who she rlly is. i want elain to stop using her sisters money to finance herself and earn it instead. feyre has been providing for elain for too long, its time for elain to step back and earn her living, i wholeheartedly believe that adds character to someone. i want elain to have a great story in the end and gods i hope sjm doesn’t just ignore her character development in favor of porn.

elain has the potential to be a great character and i hope sjm displays that.

anyways thats it lol this has turned too long when it was just supposed to be a yes or no answer lmao. im still honestly surprised about my feelings towards elain now but opinions change i guess :)

[mindgamesandhungerpains]

A rant after a sleepless night at 7 am

Tw: pls don’t read if you’re in recovery.

No one rlly talks about the SLEEPLESS nights from hunger cramps, headaches, nausea.

I’ve gone without 4 nights of sleep…

Nothing feels good anymore. Not a day goes by I wish I could recover. I wish I didn’t discover such thoughts could exist. I wish no one fucking taught me tf about dumb as calories. I wish I didn’t view food as numbers, but also look at it as my best friend.

Tbh I don’t even wanna be super stick thin. Ik what point I’d wanna stop. THE THING IS THO… the moment i stop, I gain the weight back, AND I RELAPSE AND START THE SHIT ALL OVER AGAIN.

HOW TF CAN I STOP. And you know what, without her I wouldn’t even be where I am now, BECAUSE no way in hell id lose that much in a healthy way, I bet ppl who claim losing it in a healthy way, don’t as well. Cause I’ve tried that shit. Your body kinda stops losing after a while, not to mention it’s fucking slow process and often leads to more binges/meltdowns for seeing no progress.

Anyways if this shit takes me out one day, im not even gonna be mad, it’s better than being AWAKE all night, but your body and eyes literally shutting down, but the head is running a marathon or sum.

Fuck that.