#anyways marcia is a queen

[look-at-the-stars-tonight]

I'm just slowly falling back in love with marcia

[sexynetra]

Not to obsess over Christmas tour Marcia but??? Oh my god she’s so fucking cute????

Like she’s killing me she’s genuinely killing me I cannot handle how fucking cute she is

[fisshontoast]

ID: a digital drawing of marcia and cerys as teenagers. They are kissing, and cerys is sat on marcias lap, one arm draped over her shoulder. Marcia is holding cerys's cheek with one hand. Marcia is wearing green apprentice clothes and cerys is wearing red and gold. /end ID

I don't know what the fuck possessed me to do this. I didn't even look up a reference so the anatomy is all fucky but whatever I guess

[septimus-heap]

Marcia/cerys childhood friends au....

They meet on Wizard Way when they're both abt 8 and literally walk into each other. Cerys was just out for a walk and Marcia was at the bookshop bc she'd managed to save up just enough for one new magyk book and cerys knocks it out of her hands into a puddle :(

Cerys buys her a new one as an apology and they end up talking abt some of the books in the shop

Marcias surprised bc normally she's the only one who's read any of these books but cerys has had private tutors her whole life and is way ahead of other kids their age bc of it

They end up hanging out for the rest of the day and promise to meet up again tomorrow and then the next day and the next and sometimes cerys complains abt her parents or marcia rambles abt magyk and sometimes they play games up and down Wizard Way and get under everyone's feet

Marcia finds it kind of weird that no adults ever seem to tell Cerys off for anything ever but she doesn't think too much of it. Maybe they forgive her easier because she's more polite than Marcia is

Almost a year after they first met is when Cerys finally tells Marcia that she's the princess

Marcia doesn't believe her at first but Cerys insists, and says she'll arrange a meeting with her parents to prove it

(continues under the cut)

The next day, marcia finds herself in one of the Palace's many sitting rooms, having tea with the Queen and her husband. And also Cerys who is definitely the princess which is terrifying

Cerys was rlly worried abt telling her bc she thought that Marcia wouldn't want to be her friend after she found out but Marcia's mostly just worried that the queen won't like her

(because each of the very few times she's managed to make friends, their parents haven't liked her and have told their children to stop being friends with her. She doesn't think Cerys would actually listen if that happened and she'd be fine with being friends in secret but getting on the bad side of the actual queen sounds like a very bad idea)

It turns out the queen likes her and thinks her honestly and bluntness are good traits to have as the friend of the princess

She spends a lot of time at the palace after that

Cerys tells her all about being a princess and the etiquette classes she takes (cerys loves learning about etiquette, it turns out. She loves dancing and horseriding and rules and debate and politics too. She's the perfect Queen-To-Be)

Marcia tells Cerys about school - how the teachers find her irritating for her constant interruptions and corrections, and how the other children think she's a know-it-all.

Cerys lights up and says that the queen would definitely let marcia join her lessons instead of going to school, if she wanted to, but marcia refuses, because then she might have to explain this whole thing to her mother, and she really doesn't want to. She doesn't think her mother would approve, considering their family's past experiences with royalty

Marcia meets the ExtraOrdinary Wizard for the first time when she is nine and three quarters. He greets Cerys first, of course, and then Marcia, and when he asks her name she squeaks and panics and stutters and Cerys has to answer for her. Marcia is so embarrassed she avoids the Extraordinary Wizard for the next year

Marcia is twelve when her mother finds out where she goes on weekends and after school, and the ensuing argument ends with her being locked in her room without dinner. Her mother tells her that it's for her own good, that she needs to decide whether she wants to keep her mother or her friend. That she won't be let out until she decides

She leaves through the window with a single bag of things that are irreplaceable - her sketchbook, her hand-drawn labyrinth patterns, her most loved magyk books, a picture of her and her parents, from when they were all together and happy. The guards at the palace entrance recognise her, and notice her tears, and one of them leaves his post to walk her to Cerys's room

Cerys is furious when she hears what happened. Marcia has seen her angry before but never quite like this. She finds herself thinking that Cerys is very pretty when she's angry and rapidly shoves that thought down where she can't reach it

When morning comes, marcia is officially given a room in the palace. She is asked, again, if she would like to join Cerys's lessons, but again she refuses - this time in favour of becoming a Hopeful at the wizard tower

She gets drunk for the first time when she's sixteen. There was a party in the ramblings, but she slipped away with Cerys and they're sat together in one of the many rooftop gardens when Cerys looks at her, flushed and smiling and asks if she can kiss her. Marcia, also smiling, doesn't have words to respond with, but she nods and they kiss and then are chased down from the garden by the old lady who owns it, laughing all the way

The queen is not surprised at all when they tell her, nor are any of the other people they tell. They've been making eyes at each other for years, after all

When marcia is seventeen, the Extraordinary Wizard comes to find her. He tells her that Silas is thinking of quitting, and she is his first choice for a new apprentice, if she wants to be. She's already been taught some things by him, because both alther and the queen thought it would be good for the princess's partner to be able to protect her if need be, but she was very much not an apprentice

When Cerys ends up pregnant, they of course have to talk about it. Marcia doesn't want to look after a child. She can't be a parent. Cerys does, and can, but they agree not to talk about it until the child is born

They never get a chance

Marcia doesn't mistake the assassin for a messenger, having lived in the palace for most of her life, but she doesn't immediately register them as a threat. She gets a shield up just quickly enough to send the bullet skittering into Cerys's stomach instead of her heart but she still collapses and she still drops her baby and Marcia rushes forward to catch them both

Alther was not inside her shield and the assassin's next bullet catches him in the leg

Alther tells Marcia to go and get help, and to get the baby princess to safety. He also gives her the amulet, because even though they're all fairly sure Cerys and him will survive as things are right now, they don't know if there are other assassins

Marcia leaves and Alther kills the assassin and turns his attention to helping Cerys

Marcia leaves the baby princess at the Wizard Tower and rushes back, along with two wizards from the sick bay

Alther is mostly fine, but Cerys barely survives, and they decide to keep it a secret that Cerys is alive until they can figure out what happened and so she moves in with Marcia and Alther

They still give the baby princess to the heaps, because that way even if Cerys is found out, the princess will still be safe

Alther has Marcia hold onto the amulet until the bullet wound heals and he can walk again

Okay ngl I'm tired of writing this now,, the rest will go in a reblog or smth later <33

[othercrossee]

I have so many drafts about illz and azazel like, idk what happened in 2021 for me to abandon them like that but I absolutely adore these two

[bamboobrat]

succession s4 e4 recap: ken brings a strap-on to a gunfight

I'M PSYCHIC! I'M PSYCHIC!

^^ from my recap of season 4, episode 1

turns out succession really is channeling their inner CW teen show. translation:

SHIV IS PREGNANT!

what gave it away? her face. oh, and she ordered a club soda with a closed top at the dive bar in episode two. don't think i didn't notice.

anyway, i know she's all poly representation and all, but let's be honest with ourselves: it's toms baby. she's planning her 20 week ultrasound, so i reckon.... italy?

kendall arrives at logan's makeshift wake/board meeting and overhears hugo in the lobby.

now, if you overheard someone saying "you fucked me in the ass with a strap-on" on the phone, would you guess that someone was talking to their daughter?

only on succession.

i'm not going to use space showing you hugos face, so let me summarize: his daughter sold stocks right before the news of logan's death was made public. he tells kendall. kendall has leverage.

now, enough hugo.

MARCIA IS BACK!!!

the girlies love marcia. lying about having intimate conversations with logan every night? we love that.

death truly does become her.

also, did anyone else pick up on the fact that cyd simply said "sorry babe" to kendall as he walked by?

supportive queen!

greg is also trying to be supportive and we collectively join in on the kids giving him serious side eye (or ignoring him altogether).

much like the rest of the roy family, he is incapable of any type of normal hug.

the kids discuss marcia and kerry, and roman notes that he thinks kerry is "in marcias trunk. inside an anaconda. inside a sarcophagus." for a pre-grieved boy who doesn't want to make phone sex jokes about his late dad, he's still got it.

the suits are also there, gathering in the kitchen to look at the china.

just two gal-pals backing each other in business and sitting on each other's faces

tom receives a proper whooping from karl and eats a seafood taco.

i know i should aim higher in my important trade of recaps and give you more detail, but i can't. i shan't. it is what it is.

oh, but important: karl is in on a greek island with his brother-in-law.

and "your wife doesn't even like you" is a wonderful insult.

shiv gives us an accurate representation of what it is like to talk to a swede:

for context, i'm norwegian. the banter is scandi culture.

saying "bad one" when your dad dies? also scandi culture.

willa is truly winning in this episode. she gets logan's apartment, a dig at marcia AND a moneymoon touring the midwest. cheese curds all the way.

and they save a bunch on realtor fees, of course.

the gang finds a piece of paper.

we are getting so much gerri/frank/karl content this season, i am chuffed! yes, sure, the sibling dynamic is interesting, but the gerkrank (?) vibes are strong!

they all make very funny jokes about throwing the piece of paper in the toilet. haha comedy gold.

kendall manages to make his brother and sister laugh for once in his life. all it took was for him to make a joke about their dad not being a pedo.

i'm going to make obit decoding my new thing.

a summary of logan:

threw phones at staff

racist

racist, again

relaxed about sexual assault

never payed a penny of tax

not a pedo

wouldn't even hug his grandkids

kendall's name is on the piece of paper. i reckon it's from around early season 1 times, maybe even before then.

it's not certain if the name has been underlined or crossed out. (but really, does logan strike you as the type of man who would underline anything?)

greg is also mentioned with a bunch of ????? and the big bozo deigns to suggest he might be logan's #2.

frank reacts appropriately:

they keep putting roman and gerri in the same frame.

AS IF i wouldn't notice. i see you, lorene. doing the lords work.

they rag on greg some more. it's a doodle, fuckface.

ken shares a moment with his #1 dad.

frank: he was an old bastard and he loved you me: sobbing

ken realizing he wants back in? that's self-destruction, bby!

shiv continues to hit rock bottom....

with a lil pregnancy hint and some narcisissm, framing it as if she's the only one who lost something she cared about.

but is she talking about logan? or tom? or none? or both?

i need a shiv redemption arc soon. it's beginning to feel so sexist, and not in a critique kind of way.

spooky embryo mencken is on his way to join the rest of the right wing crazies in logans eulogy.

if you are in need of motivation, work every day in your life to ensure a right wing guy will never feel inclined to do a speech at your funeral.

or, live a life that will make greg never want to talk to you. ever.

we all know tom wishes he'd taken that route.

sandy is smiling at logan being dead. sandy is us<3

why is this sex party so sad?

marcia sends kerry in a taxi to a subway so she can go home to her little apartment.

last time we see her, or does she have an unborn baby up her sleeve?

<3 roman showing kerry kindness and then immediately shitting on tom's redemption tour <3

wambsgans deserves to grovel.

stewy is a softie when it comes to ken.

his pubes got a little singed last time, but they are in love.

willa is enjoying her new apartment, as she should.

her mom is me at a buffet.

shiv gets shivved as her brothers decide to take on the role of CEO without her.

redemption arc! redemption arc! redemption arc!

obligatory screengrab that is just in here because gerri looks cute:

i couldn't even bother coming up with an excuse for this one.

chant with me: STE-WY! STE-WY! STE-WY!

power move from a power bottom. jk he is obvi a top.

and with stewy in the room, the power dynamic shifts to favor the siblings.

gerri makes a very slight move, but backs up immediately.

(don't think i don't notice that roman is still in this frame, guys. it's dark, but i notice.)

ken and his homey romey are the new interim CEOs. we all know what a thankful job that is...

shiv trips and falls and i want to kms.

do i need to chant again?

please, for the love of god, give shiv a win. the baby is not a win.

hugo and karolina suggest to the newly appointed CEOs that they throw their dead dad under the bus. roman reacts the way an emotionally mature person would:

utter distain.

ken, however, does not.

this photo will be in his phone and in his subconscience forever. the question of whether his dad loved him or not anthropomorphized.

so he tells hugo to go ahead with the "shit on logan roy" communcation strategy.

it's what his father would do.

he is pleased. and we, my girlies, are one step closer to kendall having a full godfather-like arc.

pretty sure i predicted that too, back in the day.

or is episode 4 too early to peak for our dear ken? time will tell.

next week: the gang travels to norway and i go absolutely bonkers.

[abtrusion]

Trans-national Ethnography Reading List

Studies of trans in the academy usually kind of suck. There is a tendency to speak through us, to understand our claims to gender as either pitiful or dangerously conformist, and generally to just not listen to anything we have to say. Gender has traditionally been the property of feminist theorists, who have produced a lot of great work that's well worth using. But any researcher who does not seriously contend with the anti-feminine and anti-porn tendencies of feminist theory will find it impossible to take trans seriously: we tend to be really hot, sort of sexual, and always a little bit too loud.

Ethnographic research is pretty resistant to these academic neuroses. Because ethnographic work involves months-long immersion in a group and participation in its members' daily lives, ethnographers are forced to identify with trans people for extended periods of time, which tends to bleed away the worst of this shit [1]. Ethnography also has a strong ethic toward preserving research subjects' ways of seeing the world, enforced via direct quotes, frequent narration, and the prioritization of endogenous terms which research subjects already use. As a pleasant side effect, this also makes ethnographies a bit clearer to read than your average academic tome.

So with that in mind, I've got a list of stuff to read. If you are unused to academic jargon I would recommend the books (in italics), because they tend to be more 'traditional' and therefore readable. They're also more accessible because certain sites carry a wide catalog of free digital books. The articles aren't too bad either, but ethnography really deserves a few hundred pages more than an article gives, so the writing always looks a little bit squished. I'd read "Decolonizing Transgender in India" anyways, as well as Kira Hall's excellent piece.

READINGS

Imagining Transgender: An Ethnography of a Category. By David Valentine.

The Kothi Wars: AIDS Cosmopolitanism and the Morality of Classification. By Lawrence Cohen.

Decolonizing Transgender in India: Some Reflections. By Aniruddha Dutta and Raina Roy.

Dissenting Differently: Solidarities and Tensions between Student Organizing and Trans-Kothi-Hijra Activism in Eastern India. By Aniruddha Dutta.

Elsewheres in Queer Hindutva: A Hijra Case Study. By Aniruddha Dutta.

Subjectivities, Knowledge, and Gendered and Sexual Transitions. By Paul Boyce and Aksay Khanna, chapter in the Cambridge Handbook for the Anthropology of Gender and Sexuality.

Shifting gender positions among Hindi-speaking hijras. By Kira Hall.

Perverse Citizenship: Divas, Marginality, and Participation in "Loca-lization." By Marcia Ochoa.

Queen for a Day: Transformistas, Beauty Queens, and the Performance of Femininity in Venezuela. By Marcia Ochoa.

The Made-Up State: Technology, Trans Femininity, and Citizenship in Indonesia. By Benjamin Hegarty.

Beauty that Matters: Brazilian "Travesti" Sex Workers Feeling Beautiful. By Julieta Vartabedian.

Bodies and desires on the internet: An approach to trans women sex workers’ websites. By Julieta Vartabedian.

Footnotes

The disgust can come back once they get away from us for a while. See Annick Prieur's 1994 article and her 1998 book, which have pretty different levels of casual transmisogynistic hate.

[rosenallies]

any sashnarcia pregnancy or baby fluff 🥺???

here’s a bit more baby fluff bc lowkey I’m just coming down from a pregnancy scare bebdbevsjdj anyway <3 here’s like idk some little short snippets of baby fluff bc I couldn’t think of one prompt that was longer than a paragraph or something dbebeb

——

“Do you think he loves us already? The way we love him?” Marcia spoke softly, cradling baby Kai in her arms as he slept against their chest, comforted by their steady heartbeat.

Anetra smiled fondly, brushing some wispy baby hairs from his forehead before she leaned down and kissed him there gently. “I like to think so, what do you think, Sash?”

“Well, I read-“

“Of course you fuckin’ did,” Anetra teased, earning her a glare from Marcia and Sasha at once.

“Language, Neech, we don’t want his first word to be a bad word,” Sasha chuckled, “anyway, as I was saying, yes, I think he loves us just as much as we love him. I read that even though they don’t have words to verbalize their feelings yet, babies can feel and understand to an extent emotional attachment. He needs us.”

•••

“Sasha,” Marcia whispered, poking Sasha in the side to wake her, “wake up.”

Sasha lifted her head, bleary eyed and exhausted, something they’d all been for weeks since Kai was born, though no one would change it for the world. “Huh, is it my turn to get up?”

“No,” Marcia shook their head, “listen.”

Listening closer, Sasha then heard it, the soft whispering from the baby monitor.

“I never thought I’d be a Mama,” they heard over the monitor, Anetra’s voice softer than either of them had ever heard it, “my Mama wasn’t very good to me, someday when you’re older I’ll tell you about it, but you’ll never have to worry about that, I promise. I love you so much.”

Hearing Anetra, who’d been so worried that the baby would hate her or that she would struggle to feel connected to him due to him not sharing her genetics, talk to him so calmly and softly about her own childhood brought tears to Marcia’s eyes. So what they’d cried over everything since the day Kai was conceived, this one was warranted significantly more than the tears they’d sobbed over Dairy Queen running out of Reese’s pieces one time for the milkshakes they craved while pregnant.

“She had nothing to worry about,” Sasha smiled, tenderness blooming in her chest, “she’s perfect with him.”

•••

“Come on, say it one more time! ‘Ma-ma’ ‘Ma-ma’,” Sasha cooed, the camera poised over Kai in his high chair after Sasha swore up and down he’d just said Mama for the first time.

“Maybe he’s camera shy,” Anetra giggled, “it he didn’t really say Mama and it was just baby babble.”

Sasha rolled her eyes. “Not if he’s anything like me or Marcia,” she whined, turning her attention back to the baby as he giggled, hanging on his high chair in delight, “And I swear he said it! Come on, baby, show mommy! ‘Ma-ma.”

He only continued to giggle, like he was laughing at her.

“Dammit,” she muttered, shoving her phone into her pocket and huffing, sitting beside Anetra at the table, “maybe he didn’t really-“

“Mama!” He suddenly spoke, clapping his chubby hands together.

“See! He said it! He said Mama!” Sasha got up and cheered, lifting him into her arms and kissing his cheeks in excitement, capturing it on camera be damned.

[lady-assnali]

Meet You After Dark

It’s the Anarcia Knight au with an actual working title! What?! Incredible. Anyway, here’s a long part involving  white gown, a cry for help, and a healer in a spooky shack. Also, Knight Sasha! 

(Also I could not have done this without @jinkx-monswoon who talked through this with me for sooo long and helped bring this idea from the depths and turn it into something much bigger and better than it initially was going to be. And edited it when my brain stopped working) …..

“Prince James is a good friend to you.”

“Yes, father. He’s taught me how to climb the big oak by the pond and he never makes fun of me for being slow like the Duke does, and he doesn’t leave me out of any of the games.”

“One day, I expect he’ll be a good husband to you as well.”

Marcia, still with the rounded cheeks and wide eyes of a six year-old, wrinkles her nose at the idea.

“But I don’t want to marry him.” She huffs, crossing her arms over her chest with a pout. “He’s a boy and boys are weird, and then we wouldn’t be able to play games together anymore because he’d just be a boring old husband.”

           The king chuckles, lifting his daughter onto his lap with a twinkling eye.

           “My little princess,” he coos. “I think that one day, when you’re older, you’ll start seeing things in a different light.”

…

           The Queen floats around the room with an unmatched elegance, fair-haired and button-nosed just like the princess standing before her. She smooths back her daughter’s hair in an affectionate sort of pet, crooning with delight at the radiant beauty of the heiress. The princess is laced into an elegant white gown months into the making, a delicate ornate lace with long sleeves and a bodice accentuating her lithe body. She has never looked more like royalty, and it nearly brings the mother in her to tears. The Queen, however, aptly takes over. She tuts.

           “We’re meeting within the season to discuss final plans, and then we’re to send the messages out with the official announcement.”

           “Alright.”

           “The family is coming to stay for a few days, you’ll be able to see James one last time before your wedding day. You’ll get to know his family, father will discuss with him the beginnings of plans for when you take over…”

           “Yes, mother.”

           She’s apathetic, standing in front of the gold-plated mirror while three girls flit around her with pins and string, shuffling and adjusting. She can’t stand to make contact with herself in the mirror, keeps her eyes trained on the stone wall behind it. She’s counting the loops on the curtain’s ornate patterning, lips moving slightly.

           From her place at the door Sasha watches; it’s the first time she’s seen the young, poised princess so shaken. Her skin is pallid, her face stone in an attempt to stop the quiver of her lips. Her big brown eyes are glossed over, shining with unshed tears. She hasn’t looked at herself once, not even to comment on the way their seamstresses have perfected the elegant cinch and flow of the ornate white gown she has on. Her mother stands behind her with a critical eye, doting on her daughter by making sure each adjustment is perfect. She speaks freely—as if unable to see the clear discomfort written in every inch of the princess’s body.

           She has known the princess for a good majority of her life, coming into the guard when the blonde was a bubbly, charismatic eight year old with an innate talent for charming a crowd. She’d stood guard through dance lessons, balls, banquets…she’d been able to see a bubbly eight turn into a poised eleven, a magnetic sixteen, and now a refined eighteen. The nerves on full display are not her: the one word answers, the hush of her voice, the way she stumbles over responses with a crack in her tone. Since the idea of marriage had been thrown around, she’d retreated into herself. She’d become someone different.

           They’re alone after the fitting, Marcia having asked for a few moments to contemplate the dress without the crowd of seamstresses and her babbling mother getting in her way. They’d filed out of the room rather easily, and once the door shuts Sasha watches Marcia’s shoulders finally drop. The princess takes slow, even strides around the room, the train of the dress trailing behind her like a relentless shadow. She huffs in annoyance more than once, kicking out her feet and twirling in an attempt not to tangle herself in fabric and pins. The third time she lets out an exasperated groan along with it, pressing her hand to the wall with a severely turned frown.

           “Your highness, are you alright?”

“I’m going to be okay.” She nods her head, shuts her eyes tight. “I’m delighted to marry James.”

“Mash…” It’s the childhood nickname only Sasha uses that sends Marcia into a fit. She crumbles to the floor, clutching her knees to her chest. The dress billows around her and she swipes angrily at the fabric, frantically trying to sweep it away from her line of vision. She wails, open-mouthed, and Sasha is sure she’s never heard such a gut-wrenching sound.

“I can’t do it, I can’t marry him. I can’t spend the rest of my life without her. To know what it feels to have your heart opened by somebody only to have that taken away? That’s not living.”

           “Anetra?”

           “She is comfort where everything else is turmoil. From the evening we started walking I have done nothing but fall more in love with her each night, and now I feel as though I can barely contain it. I’m a coward. I do not wish to see her lose the thing she’s worked so hard for if she were to be interested in me, it would be selfish. She’s worked so hard. She loves being here. And even then, the thought of her returning my feelings is just that—a thought.”

           “Baby, you are worth every wonderful thing.��

           “And she is worth everything she’s worked for. She’s longed for this her entire life.” The gown pooled around her makes her look much like she had when she was a little girl; vulnerable and small, swallowed up by the world. Sasha kneels beside her, waiting for a moment before gathering the princess into her arms. Marcia cries, broken and weak while Sasha holds on tight.

           “I can’t love her.”

           “But you do.”

           The crumpled up blonde picks at the lace on her dress, body overcome with a lack of feeling.

           “Am I going to spend the rest of my life like this?”

           “We’ll figure things out. I won’t ever let you walk alone, Mash. You have my word.”

…

           The princess leaves her new gown hanging in the corner of the room much more wrinkled than when she had first donned it hours before. She’s exhausted, her head spinning with expectation and responsibility. She can still see herself in all of that delicate white lace through the corner of her eyes, her mother’s entire being shining with pride while she wishes she could scratch the memory from her mind completely. She refuses dinner, claiming fatigue from the long day of preparations. In reality, she knows it will be one of the last nights she will have to herself, the days until her wedding severely numbered.

           For a moment she lays still on her bed, long legs dangling over the edge, and stares at the ceiling. Every silent comfort is suddenly suffocating, surrounded by the sinking feeling that she won’t even be able to have this privacy anymore. Even if James proves to be a kind husband, the duties of a royal remain.

           She’ll have to be his.

           She’ll have to bear an heir.

           The princess bolts upright in her bed upon the thought, breathing becoming an arduous task. She clutches at her heart, beating erratically as the walls she’d been holding up around herself in the silence finally come crumbling down. Everything she’d been avoiding has snuck in through one big Trojan horse of feeling: fear, sorrow, anger.

           Anger. The princess throws her feet on the floor, tossing pillows onto the stone with as much strength as she can muster. She growls, hands balling into fists as she punches hard onto her mattress. She beats on the plush surface until her hands buzz with an unfamiliar type of pain, tender and consuming. Beads of sweat fall from her forehead and she wipes them with the back of her hand, huffing and pacing around the room. Her eyes lock on the earthy green cloak hanging on the wall by her door.

           She slips her arms into the sleeves, buries her head in the hood.

           The princess takes a cautious glance through her window and makes the treacherous descent to solid ground and the cover of the night.

…

           Marcia arrives at the clearing in the woods with a brazen sort of courage buzzing in her head. The light of the full moon as she leaves the castle grounds shifts her rage into a steadily stirred need for a solution. While she has never been in this part of the forest before, she’d heard talks of the little shack and its intriguing inhabitant. This is the healer’s home; a mysterious shapeshifter with a knowledge of medicinal herbs and a knack for playing life’s games. The healer is known to play with fate a bit, bending things with a blend of common flowers and obscure baubles and the power of the human mind. Before, the princess found the talk to be intriguing, but nothing more than a child’s tale of caution. Now, she hopes more than anything that those childhood fantasies may just have some truth to them.

           She knocks on the door cautiously, stepping back to conceal herself in the shadows. She is met with a figure as tall as the doorframe and the instantaneous stiffening of her limbs. The healer stands before her with an all-knowing smile, beckoning her in. She hesitates, but the aching of her soul has grown so intense that she takes the step anyway, following the healer into the shack. She is but one second through the door when her mouth falls open, unable to hold in her torrent of thoughts.

           “I can’t live like this anymore.”

           “Whoa, Princess. Hold on for me there, take a breath.” The healer steps toward the wall of bottled ingredients as if to protect their hoard. She is shaking, her eyes rapidly darting around the little shack, trying to take everything in. She pulls on the hood of her cloak, slightly larger than need be and concealing a good portion of her face. Her slender frame is hidden well beneath the stealthy clothing, but the healer would have known it was her even if her button nose and blush weren’t so distinctive. The healer had known she’d be arriving soon, and they’re both aware of the unspoken knowledge. Keeping her hood up is nothing more than a façade, something to help her keep at least the myth of safety.

           Vulnerable under the stranger’s stare, the princess toes the ground with her shoe and attempts the phrasing of her request again, tears following the well-worn path down her cheeks.

           “Please, please, I need your help. With full trust in your confidentiality I will only say that I have found myself in love with someone with whom I should not be. I can not continue on this path asking them to choose leaving their dream for me, and I can not imagine living in a world where I am forced to see this person every day while I am an unhappily married woman with obligations. I do not wish to live with this grief for the rest of my life. I will not survive.”

           “You’re asking for…”

           “For help! For relief! For the mending of my broken heart so that I may do my best to lead this kingdom into an era of peace and love.”

           The healer appraises her for a moment, turning their head and widening their eyes, looking her over with a fair level of scrutiny.

“And yet you seem to be unsure.” They mumble incoherently, pacing around her. Marcia wishes she hadn’t come alone. There is a bone-chilling feel about this place, this foreign concept of witchery and potions beyond healing the most common physical ailments. This is not the palace healer with his office of neatly arranged and labeled herbs and bandages. This is a shack-like living space in the midst of the pines, a handmade door leading into a dirt floor and a ceiling of strung flowers, colorful bottles lining dusty shelves.

           She pushes the thought aside immediately, even more upset with herself than before; this is a person within her kingdom, someone with a knack for the study of herbs who happens to use them in ways she is not yet familiar with. This is what she’s been working toward, a goal of promoting this understanding to her people. This all starts with her.

           “I ask for your forgiveness. I was not raised to know people outside of my walls, and I am looking to change that. If I presented myself as rude or ill-mannered, that was not my intent.”

           “You are forgiven. Now, about that problem…” The healer leaps behind a stone counter, fingers pointing along a wall of clumsily arranged bottles before settling on one from the top shelf. Blowing off the dust, they turn to hold a bottle of beautiful pearlescent liquid. It swirls magnetically when moved around, catching and keeping Marcia’s big brown eyes, longing consuming her heart.

           “What does it do?” Her mouth moves but she can barely hear the words coming out, focused on the way the light shifts the colors of the liquid in the little bottle, how it doesn’t seem to stay one hue for long. She itches to touch it, to hold the glass in her own hands, take the liquid down her throat and soothe her aching.

           “It’s an eraser or sorts.”

           “In what way?”

           “Drink this before bed while letting yourself feel what you’re so desperately trying to forget. Think of the name of the emotion, let it really settle into your heart. Think of the person; the memories you have of them that attach them to that feeling. When you awaken in the morning, those feelings will be gone. In every interaction with this person you will be left a blank slate, a new woman.”

           “I…”

           “You say this is an unwanted feeling? This will cure it. You will be left without weight on your shoulders. You talk about carrying on? This will make that possible for you. Trust me, princess. For the good of the kingdom.”

           The young princess’s eyes are still trained on the liquid, mesmerized. Digging through the pocket of her cloak she takes out a small drawstring purse and tips out several gold coins. They’re heavy in her palm as she hands them over, the breath leaving her body as her fingers finally close around the little glass bottle. Breathlessly, she thanks the healer.

           Her steps back to the castle grounds are brisk and careful.

           Anetra’s name sits precariously on her tongue, a well-guarded feeling ready to consume her.

           She’s thinking about soft brown waves pulled into a uniform updo while she hangs up her coat. She can practically feel the brush of their fingers while they walk, the frightening spark sent through her bones. The princess closes her eyes only to see the endless depths of warm brown eyes staring back at her; all of their unsaid words, glances across rooms, whispers in the moonlit halls. Her heart flutters, hums in appreciation. Sitting on her bed, Marcia finally allows her mind to wander to the possibility of it all, the unmatched happiness of Anetra’s companionship, the safety. The love.

           I love her. The words are delicate on her quiet tongue, her whisper caught by the air and dispersed in the space around her.

           I love her. She unearths the cork from the tiny glass bottle with a satisfying pop, an enticing floral aroma filling her senses.

           I love her. She takes one last look at the pearlescent liquid and holds on to the image of Anetra burned into her mind, her heart swelled up with affection. She takes the potion in one turn, deftly  swallowing it all before casting the bottle beside her on the bed. The knight’s name is a symphony in her head, a melody played rapturously over and over until suddenly, it comes to a screeching halt.

           I love her.

           Marcia gasps at the sudden pit of swirling heat in her stomach, the way it puffs up like the embers of a fire, spreading in painful, acidic flames through to her toes. She stumbles backward onto the bed, clutching at the clothes on her body, ripping at her gown in a futile attempt to feel some kind of relief. She’s thinking of brown eyes when the fire spreads to her lungs, taking away her breath with a warmth so much more violent than that of her knight’s soothing voice. She is reduced to a desperate flailing of limbs, thrashing and grabbing at herself and choking on her mute, helpless screams. Her hair sticks to the sweat of her forehead, her eyes wide and unfocused. The room spins violently around her, and she is unable to find purchase.

Anetra, I’m sorry.

The princess’s body falls slack against the mattress, succumbing to the pearlescent fire.

[chaos-has-theories]

WIP Tag/Reblog Game

Thank youuuuu @aidanchaser!

List the titles your top five priorities for WIP updates (link your fics for new readers!)

An upcoming scene, event, or detail in each fic that you're looking forward to writing

Bonus: make a poll for your followers to vote on which top 5 WIP they are most excited to see an update on!

Then tag 10 writer friends!

WIP TITLES

Specifically 5 fanfics this time around - the things that are loudest about rattling my head at the moment.

Timetravel AU - Septimus Heap After a series of escalating deaths, Marcia and Septimus use the House of Foryx to travel back in time and - hopefully - fix things.

Merlin Resurrection AU - working title "I Refuse" Merlin has been alive for a thousand years, and he just found out that the rest of the gang is back. The problem is, none of them fully remember anything: It's only just enough to spook Arthur hard enough that he cut contact with all of the others and is trying his hardest to just be an obnoxious college student.

Three is Company - Septimus Heap, role swap AU. Prequel/Equel to The Long Way Home. Answers such thrilling questions as "how did Septimus get adopted by the Queen?", "how much trauma can you put into one freshly-minted EOW?" and "What exactly IS going on between Marcia, Milo and Cerys?"

The Egypt Agenda Part 4: The Distant Goddess I have yet to properly write out my Egyptian analysis of Nona the Ninth! Also I've been meaning to put the other parts on Ao3 for a while

Gideon the Musical Ohhhh boy I just rediscovered this while going through my drafts and?? I mean no there's pretty much nothing in that file yet but now I really want to pick it up again

UPCOMING SECTIONS

I am two-thirds through the scene in which Septimus and Simon infiltrate the Young Army to rescue 412. I'm not sure why I haven't kept working because technically I'm at such a juicy point? 412 thinks he's about to be thrown into DN1, Septimus can't tell him what's really going on, and Simon is being told to do a spell that this-timeline Simon has no reason to know. It's GOOD I think I'm just scared I can't hit the correct balance for it

sgahjhgsshfdg Merlin just met Gwen and the Knights at a metal concert and they made their way backstage to greet Morgana and Morgause but like. Morgana is half-convinced he'll try to kill her again. Gwen is crying. Merlin is inwardly screaming because if THEY'RE all back does that mean Arthur is as well??? I probably COULD skip the explanations and just continue the scene where he confronts Arthur. I'm just.... not sure how to resolve it yet. Stubborn Prince is being Stubborn.

Milo just fished a baby from the river and is walking towards the Palace to greet his wife and newborn daughter. He is about to a) be accosted by a very panicked Marcia b) have to fast-talk his way past the Supreme Custodian and c) find out that his daughter is very dead. Noone is having a good day, except maybe for me, because all of this is setup for some VERY stupid miscommunication.

DID YOU KNOW that there's an actual myth in which "Alecto" runs off to live in a land where "John" has no direct jurisdiction so he has to send "Ianthe" to cajole her into coming back? YEAH. THAT

Act I works pretty well! Even Act II is fine! It gets more difficult after that. Anyway I have decided there's going to be a song called "To the Floor" and then it can have reprise elements in all the other duel scenes. How? I dunno whatever gave you the idea that I know what I'm doing

No way I can think of 10 and I don't know if any of you have already been tagged but hmmmm - @echo-has-queries @into-september @trainsinanime @liesmyth @septimus-heap

[terramythos]

So Marcia is Maeve. Two major pieces of evidence from Be The Serpent, not even touching the weird shit with her in other books.

Number One:

Marcia is seneschal of Goldengreen, which is literally located inside an oceanside cliff (a rock) with a pier inside that has shown up multiple times in PLOT CRITICAL scenes.

Before becoming seneschal of Goldengreen, Marcia lived under the protection of Lily, an undine, aka a (super rare btw) water fae. Now she lives next to the ocean. "She always did love the water."

Number Two:

Maeve's descendents were born "ready for war" because Titania's hunted them down? Interesting. Tell me again about name meanings being relevant foreshadowing. FROM THIS SAME BOOK: "Stacy" means "resurrection". Turns out she is LITERALLY Titania caught in an eternal loop of resurrection. Why wouldn't the same naming convention apply to the other Queen?

Anyway excited for when that gets revealed. Me and @mistressofmuses are objectively correct about this btw.

[sexynetra]

Met Jackie Cox at musical theatre trivia and I need the world to see how cute these selfies I got with her are 🥺

[missjanjie]

y’all remember the era where fans would call queens different iterations of jan (rosé was pink jan, lemon was yellow jan, etc)

anyway if they were still doing that im 100% convinced loosey would’ve been dubbed something like ‘construction worker jan’ and marcia would’ve been like, ‘no makeup jan’ or ‘baby jan’

[septimus-heap]

Thinking abt the time travel fix it fic I have spinning around in my head. Unfortunately for it to work I have to kill off basically every single character of importance which is all well and good it just feels kind of brutal

[eyeslikewatercoolers]

Here’s s15 queens as The Unsinkable Eight from The Wilds

Another list nobody asked for, but I’m doing anyways. The Wilds was my hyperfixation show before Drag Race, and I’ve been wanting to make this for weeks. Now featuring commentary!

And a preface that this list is just based on personality, and has absolutely nothing to do with the storylines or character arcs in the show itself (this makes more sense if you’ve seen The Wilds)

Leah: Loosey (Both are unhinged white women, let’s be honest)

Fatin: Luxx (similar confident and leader-like personalities)

Dot: Irene (both from Texas and I can see Irene being a survivalist tv watcher)

Shelby: Marcia (Literally what inspired this list)

Rachel: Jax (Both hardworking athletes)

Nora: Anetra (Both quiet and she’s the only one I trust in being the mole on a psych experiment)

Toni: Aura (closest one I can find to a jock character but this one was the hardest)

Martha: Either of the twins (closest I can find to a sweet and naive type)

(Bonus!) Jeanette: Sasha (…apologies for this one but it fits perfectly)

[salted-caramel-tea]

I didn’t know you liked drag race! What’s your rankings from best to worst queens?

girl how i liveblog my reactions every saturday . anyway

anetra . hands down since the moment she walked in

sasha colby

mistress isabelle brookes

luxx noir london

spice

marcia marcia marcia

irene dubois

sugar

malaysia babydoll foxx

jax

loosey laduca

robin fierce

amethyst

salina estitties

princess poppy

aura mayari