#aromantic theory shit i've read

[cistematicchaos]

ID: a post by @ / myceliumgirl from Sep 16th, 2022 reading:

"Call it solidarity, call it the evolutionary drive towards mutual aid, call it friendship, call it camraderie, call it community. Call it whatever you want, but understand that it is love."

I love this post. It's poetry, it's beautiful and it's true to me. But I also think a lot about how (I think it was) @jacuzziwaters who pointed out that the last part of it doesn't apply to plenty of us. Like, obviously, all of these things are connected and it's glorious, but your foundation for these things doesn't have to be love, love doesn't even have to be part of the picture.

I know the idea of loveless connections, relationships, ect is just completely unfathomable to some people but they're here. They exist and they're beautiful and important too.

Obviously, solidarity/community/ect can be shitty as well, falling into abusive structures and patterns and/or existing solely for bigoted reasons but if we're gonna acknowledge their beauty, I think it's definitely worth pointing out love isn't what makes these remarkable. Or rather, it doesn't have to be love; there is beauty in these connections alone, in community dedicated toward taking care of its own. Loveless relationships/connections prove that all the time and deserve the acknowledge for it, honestly.

[cagandante-communistoide]

List of palestinian fundraisers I've posted recently ^

Help Muhammed Shehab in Gaza

Mandatory reading #1

Mandatory reading #2

may as well make an intro post ig. discord username is raincaffeine, if we're mutuals feel free to message me, I'm bored. call me whatever you want. they/it, i'm agender. i'm also aroace and if you give me the chance I won't stfu about it. cuban parents, tragically living in burgerland. i'm taino descendant and parde so please don't be cringe cracker in my direction. i tag my textposts as #black hole babbles, my asks as #black hole asks and my art as #black hole art. If you wanna see me talk about aro/ace stuff specifically, I tag for that with #on asexuality and #on aromanticism, respectively. If you want to see me talk about gender in society, especially about exorsexism and transmisogyny, I will tag #on gender as well as any other positionality tags that apply. Pictures I take will be tagged with #black hole pics. I will tag posts which expose you to horrific takes with #dipshit tag , so if you don't want to see it then I recommend you block that tag.

I'm a marxist transfeminist in support of the liberation of all gender and sexual dissidents via the abolition of cisalloheteronormative relationship structure. no i will not hear out your grievances against a trans woman or an aromantic/asexual person.

I like geopolitics, visual art, music theory and composition, programming and video game development, math, biochemistry, cosmology, and tearing apart shit media for lols and lmaos. sometimes i complain on here so nobody has more fun than me.

en español, uso los pronombres elle y le, y el sufijo -e. En lugar de el/ella usa elle. En lugar de la/el use le. En lugar de un sufijo -o/-a en una palabra en referencia a mi, use -e. Ejemplo: “Elle es le blogueadore que nadie sigue porque habla mucha mierda.” Mis posts en español usualmente tendran el tag #espanol por si quieres verme hablar mierda en otro idioma.

a list of vetted palestinian fundraisers

[eyobis-andthe-bunnycats]

I'm so fucking pissed off I need to vent somewhere. Feel free to skip this post if you're not interested in reading what an angry non-partnering aroace has to say.

***

Backstory: There's this cute little webcomic I've been reading that has confirmed soulmates with a Red String of Fate. You know, stereotypical amatonormative shit but portrayed in a cute semi-fantastical world. I really enjoy the world building of the story and the themes the author is exploring. I'm currently reading a spin off of the comic. So far we have been shown everyone is born with a Red String tied on their pinky and that at the "right time" that string connects to someone else and you're bound to have a very good relationship with that person(s) [I do believe it is mentioned in universe that there's been people whose red string connects to more than one person (yay polyam!)] and if you work through the beginning stages, you and your string partner(s) are guaranteed to have a fulfilling relationship, which is HEAVILY IMPLIED to be romantic.

In recent chapters of this comic, there was a character currently shown to be on his own. In a more recent episode, the guy is said to have been born without a string and is fine on his own. I was fucking ecstatic! I have been wondering how this world would handle aromantic and other identities and here was an established character that didn't match up with the current narrative of the setting. I left a comment on the episode listing possible scenarios as to why this character did not have a string and why he was fine alone.

I theorized that maybe he was aroace. Or he could have been some other a-spec identity that I wasn't familiar with. And then I theorized maybe he was non-partnering, something that very rarely ever is portrayed in any media that I've seen. Everyone is constantly paired up with someone for one reason or another. So seeing a character without someone and is fine on his own and fucking said he's fine, I was overjoyed to learn more about him and how the setting worked in this comic.

The problem: it might be a coincidence but this other commenter keeps replying to my comments about not being partnered with the phrase "soulmates don't have to be romantic, they can be ✨ best friends ✨."

I did not say at any point that soulmates were only romantic and that best friends didn't count. Like I'm not fucking talking about partnerships? I'm talking about NOT having ANY. And the fact this person said this shit to me twice on two different comments is annoying as all get out. I do not know if they know they're talking to the same person (me) or they think they're being an advocate for aromantic people who have a partner or something.

This just struck a nerve with me because as previously mentioned, non partnering people are hardly EVER discussed or shown in stories, and if it is, it's usually along the lines of "oh they're a broken person who needs fixed." I even have to deal with this shit IRL with my bigoted dad and cis heteronormative friends who are starting to try to pair me up with their friends' kids. Someone I'm BARELY acquaintance with just got engaged a month ago and to be married this weekend and our mutual acquaintances are starting to ask me about my partnerships because of that.

As an aroace person who is not interested in partnership, I'm ticked off.

So, you know, seeing a character in a story not partnered and living alone and BEING HAPPY in a world where everyone has at least a someone, made me really happy and I was excited to learn more about this character and this world he's a part of.

I do not give a shit if my theories are wrong, they're just theories. I just want to learn how this setting works. I have hardly seen any media that has soulmates talk about a-spec identities or non partnering people, and especially I've not seen it written with characters who are not cishet.

This series has gay relationships galore and it also has relationship trauma THAT GETS TALKED THROUGH AND RESOLVED. Great things that I am enjoying! I just really enjoy this setting and the world building and I just want to see if the creator will throw me a bone; I've just been getting scraps and I'm a little nippy.

(this is okay to reblog if you want! I'm just screaming here)

[bnnuy-wabbit]

HAAIIIIII you can call me Lago, im 21 (i dont know how EITHER), im just some guy*. this is my main blog and where i throw funny things that makes my brain produce juices and also random ass personal poasts.

one of those he/shes they never warned you about (pathogenic variant they have yet to make any vaccines to protect you from)

my art tag is #feral art tag.

there will be adult things in this blog because im an adult. follow at your own risk etc. were horny in here towards men occasionaly.

I'm brazilian. From Brazil. As in born here, living here and stuck here for the foreseeable future. é nois 🤙

Everybody says I'm really nice! I am Unable to hit people up first though, but if you'd like to be friends, send me an ask and I'll give you my discord!!!!

i have many interests (mostly music and nerd shit) and funny things that I'll be putting under the read more lest this post get Unbearably Big. There are flashing blinkies down there by the way.

OK SO INTERESTS. I like MANY things! and i have favorite things! I think it's really cool of me to have favorites. i decided I'm going to wear them on my sleeve. anyways Here's some things i Like.

MUSIC!!! its one of my favorite things ever. I play the guitar and a bit of bass. heres stuff in no particular order of favoriteness. Just stuff i care enough right now to remember.

Linkin Park (meteora, hybrid theory <3)

My Chemical Romance

Red Hot Chili Peppers

Mindless Self Indulgence

scalene

Rammstein

Ft-rj (listen to it or i am going to chase you with a broom)

francisco el hombre (i recommend the rasgacabeza album)

danny bond

2000-10s pop!!! fuck it, lady gaga, britney spears, kesha, katy perry, black eyed peas, that sorta jazz.

Every single Homestuck song there is. i have listened to all of them multiple times. My favorite albums are colours and mayhem and also the beforus fan album.

Dad rock (acdc, queen, talking heads, nirvana, judas priest, Some pink floyd etc)

Industrial and Adjacent. I've been listening to code:redcore a lot and some grammostola actaeon lately. processor also fucks.

OTHER THINGS I ENJOY

Eragon (the books)

Disco elysium.

ADVENTURE TIME. I AM OBSESSED.

How to train your dragon (the books. specifically.)

Animated movies!!! Specially the hand drawn ones.

My horrible little OCs (@honsebeasts just go there but also Beware.)

Worldbuilding. I do aliens and monster speculative biology. Most of my thoughts on it are on the Above mentioned blog though.

Real life physiology and anatomy also

MEN (and like 3 fictional women.)

HORSES!!!!!!!!!!!

stranger things

Pokemen (i do not know a single thing after gen 6 though.)

Dungeons and dragons, sometimes

Traditional art like watercolors and oil pastels

Drawing my blorbos in the same side facing pose or just standing there.

Drawing in General actually! Designing characters is my passion

Fictional fathers

sewing and felting and sculpting and painting and singing and playing

COLORS. i love colors. i love looking at them. i love playing with them. i would like to eat them if i could. i love warm palettes.

Hiveswap (pissing screaming CRYING)

MONSTERS!!!!!! They're really cool and gay and hot.

Portal (the games. all of them. glafos........ kissing her)

Half Life.

y2k and 80s-90s vibes. i think its awesome.

I am afflicted by the human condition and also a few other funnier conditions. my brain and my body dont work right.

If you want to know the brunt of the brain ones: autism adhd avpd. they all impact heavily how i interact with people with people. Sorry in advance if i can't keep conversation going.

I'm some sort of queer thing. If we need to get really specific, id say "bisexual aromantic bigender femme", mostly into men and butches, but Queer will do just fine. I'm a self entitled part time pretty fag and ugly dyke in my free hours. Intersex it turns out.