#art that isnt good enough for the art blog :P

[beelas-bees]

@foolyne​, bullying me :( /j /lh

[rodrickheffley]

sometimes i wonder if ppl on here ever consider that literally no one owes you a rb on your art or whatever even if they like it and even if you spent a ton of time on it like can we please not moralize this its so strange

[cat-boots]

holyyy fucken shit i finally found your blog. mail time

did you ever go through a period in your art where it felt like your artstyle was bad? like, have you ever felt like you needed to learn super duper realistic anatomy really badly or else you'd just be bleh forever? what'd you do?

thx. -p

hiya!

I've definitely had times where I've seen some amazing work by someone else and thought "well what's the point in making anything myself? this person's nailing it!". that's a trap, though! comparing yourself to others is a one way ticket to a hellpit of perfectionism that's a real struggle to get out of.

much better to compare yourself to your past self. you can see the growth, then. and if you see someone else do something amazing, analyse it and see if you can pick up anything from it you can use in your own art.

the "two cakes" meme is an old one but nothing's said it better - even if you made a cake that isnt as impressive as another one at the table, it's still another cake! holy shit, two cakes!

what's most important to me, despite things like technical proficiency, is that I'm having fun and that my art gets the point across that I'm trying to make. I don't mean that it has to have super deep meaning - more like, if I want to draw a cute dragon wizard casting a spell, then did I draw a cute dragon wizard casting a spell? that's all that matters, baybee

also I'm self-taught and I try not to fret about things like "super duper realistic anatomy". I've always been a "learn as I go" kinda guy so as long as it looks right to me then it's good enough

thanks for the nice ask :3

[artzary]

crawls out of the shadows

my god I've been really inactive and im sorry fam,,,, school has me extremely drained but not drained enough for ART!!

so without further ado...

Take your dang Regressor ! Shadow Milk Cookie

Headcanon time babyy!!

Regresses to around 1 to 3 years old

Usually the other Beasts take care of the little jester, but sometimes Pure Vanilla Cookie will stay with him if the others aren't available

Openly uses pacifiers when little. He likes having something in his mouth whenever he's feeling small

He'll entertain his toys from time to time. His caregivers will usually sit in on this and give the toys personalities and make them come alive!

very picky about his food when regressed. If it looks yucky, smells yucky, or just isnt what he wanted, he will NOT eat it. at all.

However, he adores naptime. All he needs to fall asleep is a stuffie and any warm blanket or quilt, and he's out.

if they have to go out, he'll CLING to his caregiver, not liking people he doesn't know see him small.

When its Silent Salt Cookie taking care of him, (live love ShadowSalt), he likes to hide in his cape, laughing when he acts like he doesn't know where his baby is.

His favorite shows to watch when little are probably things like Little Charmers, or Octonauts.

It feels good to be somewhat back, but I'm on mobile yippiee! I love all you goobers, and Thank You for supporting my blog. Truly, it means the world to me!! I'll be trying to get through requests, so keep an eye out, haha!

Lots of Love , Ary /p /vpos

[quinnkdev]

Just wanted to say, I'm looking forward to when you write about why you stopped using RPG Maker 2003! It sounds like a very interesting read to me, as I myself eventually want to write about why I keep crawling back to it, ha! (It's mostly how it comes with the most out of the box compared to later RPGMs, whose scripting capabilities are useless if one doesn't feel up to learning the code... at that point I may as well start coding from scratch, which is exactly the path you seem to have taken, fittingly enough! It's not satisfying to try and master an RPG engine when know I can't do anything remotely cool with it without learning something completely different.. I boil it down to 'you can't make Yume Nikki with newer RPGM default tools', but I definitely want to expand more on the thought) I haven't had the time or energy to try any of your games yet, but I'm p sure we used to be in a Discord server together, and looking over periodically and seeing how much progress you've made has been really cool, so I'm excited to get around to trying them! Someday I too want to learn a proper coding language and move away from RPG Maker, but until then it gets the job done for me (especially with the recent Maniacs Patch mod that greatly expands what it can do).

Wishing you luck on your current project in the meantime!!

hey, i had this lying around in my inbox for entirely too long - and for that i apologise, i wasnt really sure who you were until i followed a context-cue from your blog to your art-stuff just now. good to have heard from you again, and no hard feelings :,)

rm2k3 is decidedly a development space that makes sense. hell, on the side, i am currently making a small game in it again with a friend (no ETA yet). something nice about a path of less resistence towards something neat youve been thinking about.

the maniacs patch is definitely something i took note of out of the corner of my eye (and in watching riggy2k3's streams on occasion), but having released two games in the engine on steam, i kind of dont think that i can take it on board as the future of my commercial game efforts.

as much as it hurts to admit, i cant think of game development as my fun art anymore - i have to sell the things i make in it now, and rm2k3 games arent very well equipped for that. they dont interlock well with steam, meaning you can't give players achievements or even let them take screenshots through the platform (something a lot of them are VERY unhappy about). that, and tons of QOL problems (one time, somebody refunded a game of mine because it was "too small, hard to see" - rather than realising there was a way to fullscreen it).

regarding yume nikki likes in newer rpg maker versions - i mean, id say "swollen to bursting until i am disappearing on purpose" by december 7th does an admirable job of being one made in rpg maker mv! but of course that one uses tons of plug-ins.

bottom line: programming isnt desperately needed if you primarily like making games for the fun of it (and seeing that you predominantly make fanworks, id wager thats your main objective! good! :] ). if you need to earn a living (like... me :( ) then you may have to bite the bullet.

[lostandfem]

Hey I dont think jumping from a cult to another one will be helpful to you. You should check deeper into a more broad generalisation of life experiences instead of making your whole life about your gender again. Radical feminism isn't helpful because it doesn't take women accountable for the shit they do to other women too. Blaming males all day long won't work or do shit because we have to solve our own issues between females to live better lives. Sure men can be awful. But so are women. Radfems are also full of shit and attack peoples physical flaws at the second they have the occasion to. They don't really understand that women come in different shapes and ethnicities. Shit like "oh look at her body hair/facial hair" for exemple will come on the table all the time. Or while trying to make fun of transwomen they'll insult women that are less GC too because they don't give a shit anymore. So be careful with "communities"... Those women aren't full on accepting. That's my two cents. Good luck with everything, life's hard and so is finding respectable people... Or real lesbian women and sane bisexual women. But never give up. You'll find your way.

yknow, i appreciate youre trying to be helpful, but i trust myself here, and i dont really appreciate the patronizing attitude. im not some helpless, lost puppy

its interesting youre talking about making gender my whole life again tho. its not something id expect someone to acknowledge. most people dont want to acknowledge that thats what its like in the trans community. but this isnt making gender my whole life again. acknowledging misogyny and sexism isnt obsessing about an identity. these are judgement calls about peoples lived experiences as well as my own. and yeah, absolutely both men and women can be awful as individuals, but thats an entirely different issue from recognizing how women are treated as a sex because of their reproductive capabilities. that capability is a resource people want to take control of (if you support abortion rights then thats the cause youre addressing for an example of how thats a real issue that needs to be discussed). if you recognize that, you recognize that theres an imbalance between what sex holds power. were not “blaming males”, were recognizing who holds the power in the situations we are disadvantaged in. you have to find a source to a problem *somewhere*. women doing bad things to other women doesnt mean that power imbalance doesnt exist. and looking inward to address an outward disadvantage doesnt make any sense. if we examine ourselves enough, will the pay gap close, for example? is it womens fault theres a pay gap to begin with?

also idk where youre getting your information about what radfems think about other women, but do you think theyd even tolerate me here if they only wanted a certain type of body? my tits are gone and im hairy from testosterone. if they were anti-body diversity, why am i accepted anyway? why are they accepting any detrans woman? ive seen these women come in every shape and ethnicity, and praise women of every size and ethnicity (from thirsting to beautiful photography).

if you want to look into it, check out @ laetitiaky on instagram. shes a black woman who describes sex-based oppression from her own experiences, essentially (also makes p cool art). if you want to see examples of radfems of colour the blogs @oneblackbraid and @rad-by-nature are two off the top of my head (hopefully im not mistaken rip). im sure if you scroll enough youll find them talking about radical feminism in relation to racial issues.

anyway thanks for the advice, but i didnt ask to be helped. i hope you find your way, too

[taffyforever]

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚ HAPPY JUNE, DUNCIES !!!! ヾ(˵ •̀ ᴗ •́ ˵ )

happy summer, happy pride month, and a happy afternoon from me to you, duncies !! welcome to my BRAND NEW taffyblog !!!!!! i told yall i would do it and here i am !!!! ⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚

as my first order of taffyblog business, i encourage you to look around the site ! i havent edited tumblr html in ages so it was super fun going back to my roots for this project ٩(ˊᗜˋ*)و ♡ you may notice a... new face in that header..... i didnt want to go thru the effort of creating 2 headers for when i redebut, so congrats ! you get a sneak peek at some new art for the new design ૮(˶˃ᆺ˂˶)

i need to make a dedicated tweet for it, but my comms are very open rn !! if you're looking for a last minute summer outfit, or a very early winter outfit, i'm your gal ! of course my strengths lie in gyaru and similar fashions, but ive done anywhere between elegant seamstress to gothic vampire. send an ask here or dm on twitter/discord if you'd like to comm me or discuss any other services (illust, reactive png, etc) (๑>ᴗ<๑)ぐ〜♡

aight, business out of the way. how have you been, duncies ? (seriously, send me an ask and let me know !) i miss yall a lot, but i know im making the right decision being on hiatus. there's been some recent developments in my life that are making things a lot nicer for me, so i'm doing very well as of late. my physical health is pretty good ! isnt it crazy how when you take medication it makes u feel better lol. i am scared for the summer, as last year's heat wave was a major factor in me getting as sick as i did. i do have air conditioning now ! so hopefully things will be a lot easier. my mental health is also better, though i still need to take many steps in ensuring the best for myself. like, im good now, but im not set forever just yet. we work hard one day at a time 💪🏼💪🏼💪🏼💪🏼💪🏼

ultrakill news: i've spent a loooottttt of free time cybergrinding......... like i might just guerilla soon because ive gotten much better since last you've seen. marksman my beloved im coinpilled now <3 i also got a p rank in clair de lune ! (haven't bothered to try the other levels yet i love cybergrind too much)

i have no geoguessr news that game is still as ass as ever </3 still love her tho (✿˶•ᵕ•)♡(• ᵕ •˶)

redebut is still set for august 25th ! very very excited to come back more cracked than ever ᕙ( •̀ ᗜ •́ )ᕗ if you'd like to support me until then, follow my twitch if you havent yet ! you can also support me financially (IF YOU ARE IN A GOOD SPACE TO DO SO) by commissioning me or sending me a gift from my throne ! i am reworking my tipping page, so tips/donos are currently unavailable. i would heavily appreciate anything, but it is in no way necessary. you reading this and supporting me is enough <3 o(⸝⸝✦ᗜ✦⸝⸝)☆

thank you duncies for everything !!!! ⋆˚✿˖° i'll be updating this blog every so often before my redebut to keep yall posted on anything cool in my life. i really appreciate all of you for being here for me. i'm very excited for my return ৻( •̀ ᗜ •́ ৻) !!!!!!! ♡ ༘*. stay tuned on twitter for some rebrand changes (❀❛ ֊ ❛„)ಇ

TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF BE KIND TO OTHERS KEEP IT P.L.U.R. ʚɞ ⁺˖ ⸝⸝

[uncleardyn]

*hands you a raskolnikov* *hands you a raskolnikov* *hands you a raskolnikov* *hands y

[beelas-bees]

tododeku doodle dump i just totally forgot to post? been collecting dust in my drafts lol

[nbapprentice]

there’s so, so, SO much nonsense surrounding this game that i’m gonna do my best to separate it into digestible bits, with its own categories. even then this is... wow. it’s big.

Warning tags will be added at the start of every section, but the general gist is: incest, pedophilia mentions, fetishization of rape and abuse, fetishization of mlm, fetishization of people of color, racism, ableism, nb erasure and transphobia. aside of the warnings, this post will also touch upon Scummy Business Practices

let’s get going

Dana Rune’s and Elle’s lack of moral fiber: #incest #pedophilia#rape and abuse fetishization #homophobia

tl;dr: dana loves incest porn, elle loves guy on guy rape, and the both of them are friends with at least one pedophile

dana rune has run, is still running an incest zine (please visit my faq on what i think about “thats not really incest” and “it’s just fictional!”). The Arcana, as a dev team, clearly does not care, as shown in their e-mail responses.

dana also very much doesn’t care and has reacted to any criticism on this by dismissing people and blocking actual incest victims who tried to contact her about it claiming it was for her “mental health”

in some tweets she claims she “interprets” the characters as not siblings, but she never really cared enough to cover her ass when it all began (she happily admits she’d “cross the incest line”)

dana has commissioned artists who also ship incest, draw near-pedophilic art that’s supposed to pass as acceptable because the character involved is supposedly not a minor despite looking like a child down to wearing pigtails (the character is also wearing a racist-ass belly dancer outfit), AND even made white-washed fanart of The Arcana.

dana follows twitter user kapymui who also produces incestuous Fire Emblem art

dana has retweeted omocat long after it came out that omocat is, at the very least, consuming pedophilic content (on “omocat didn’t know what shota meant!”: yes they did)

moving on, elle has a long, long, LONG history of fetishizing mlm and the rape and abuse that comes with yaoi and had a rich, RICH “yaoi” tag before they deleted their tumblr

they curiously deleted their tumblr right after i made this reblog

shortly after that, tumblr user thalassiq remade and started attacking and insulting any blogs criticizing them - even people providing support in IMs. Since this doesn’t match Dana and Elle’s normal pity parties I’m personally willing to believe they were just a person wanting to start shit - but it’s so telling how Elle used this chance to dismiss everyone who disagrees with them by calling them “children” and did not even bother to offer a kind word to people who were harassed and even had their trauma mocked by this person. It costs 0 dollars to say “that was not me but I’m sorry about people who were hurt.”

Dana and Elle are close with Ava’s Demon creator Michelle Czajkowski aka that one person who endorses child porn of her characters, and even had her draw a promo image for the game. Michelle has been creating highly sexualized content of her minor characters for a while now.

ok so elle and dana are gross freaks, how is that related to the game?

oh it’s very very related

Dana Rune’s and Elle’s lack of moral fiber that’s Actually Inside The Game or The Game’s Blog: now with more #racism #fetishization of poc and mlm #whitewashing #fat hate #pedophilia #nb erasure #transphobia

tl;dr: the arcana is filled to the brim with racism! so much of it! haha holy shit! and that’s not even where it ends!!!

their game is rated PG-13 but includes incredibly sexual situations such as Julian making this fucking face while getting off on pain. This isn’t the only time Dana and Elle use their videogame aimed at young teens to showcase their kinks and fetishes. I have no issue with NSFW or titillating content, as long as it’s rated accordingly. This content is NOT and it’s a blatant disregard for their audience just to have a larger, more pliable demographic and have more money sent their way.

if you start your argument with “well, teenagers look at porn” 1. shut up 2. theres a HUGE difference between teenagers going after adult content aimed at adults, and adults creating content they know will be seen by kids barely starting puberty

as pointed above, dana has 0 qualms literally commissioning people who make whitewashed fanart of her own fucking game that’s supposed to be all about the inclusivity and safe spaces

thearcanagame blog has a pattern of reblogging whitewashed fanart (before you come in swinging with the good ole “ITS THE LIGHTING”: 1. no it isnt 2. the artist should’ve picked better lightning then 3. i draw and post shit online too so dont come telling me i just dont understaaaand),

fanart of their fat characters showed skinnier than they are in their sprites (although to be real for a moment - Portia is curvy at most and them behaving she’s fat rep is HILARIOUS).

going back to NSFW content: nadia and asra are overwhemlingly sexualized in the game, and were the first to have sexualized CGs and sprites introduced.

CGs: Asra’s here, here aND HERE, Nadia’s here with a NSFW warning because she’s just got her whole fucking ass out. Sprites: Asra’s thank god for whoever compiled it all in one image, Nadia’s and once again, NSFW warning lmfao!

Julian’s sprites on the other hand are noticeably tamer, including the one where he’s fucking strapped in leather. His only sexual (NSFW warning because its literally softcore tentacle porn WHICH, ONCE AGAIN, SHOULDN’T BE PUT IN A GAME AIMED AT 13YOS) CGs were also included months after Nadia and Asra received any of theirs.

Through all of the updates, people have constantly requested that Asra and Nadia’s sexualization be toned down, and time after time The Arcana just churned out fetishistic, hypersexualized content at an absurd rate, especially when compared to the one white love interest.

Oh, speaking of the one white love interest: Julian is based off of Jeff Goldblum (this is not spectulation - they p much bring it up at any given time) but like. If Jeff Goldblum was white. They base their favorite love interest off their supposed favorite man in the world but casually leave his skin tone behind. Lmao.

they also play favorites very obviously - in the prologue, Nadia and Asra have a romance paid scene each. Julian has a scene... that requires no coins. Julian was also the first LI to receive three CGs, two of them requiring no coins, while both Asra’s and Nadia’s first CGs were behind a paywall

Dana and Elle have been notoriously skittish about confirming or denying their characters’ ethnicities. After hyping for weeks on thearcanagame that they would confirm the character’s races they basically made a post that amounted to “well they’re not white lol!”

they only relented after the perfectly understandable outrage... and posted a thread about it on Elle’s twitter. Nothing on the actual thearcanagame blog. Anyway, here’s the thread. Note how there’s mention of Julian being Jeff Goldblum... but nothing about him and Portia being Jewish (or “fantasy Jewish” as it were).

The one time they did confirm their jewishness dana then backpedaled and said she shouldn’t have done that lol.

another fun tidbit of how well The Arcana handles race and how much it cares about feedback from fans: an ask was sent about an anon begging for Nadia to step on them. The blog, with the finesse of a bunch of horny dumbasses, didn’t just publish the ask, but approved of it (even though the fans of color had long, long, LONG been telling everyone not to fetishize Nadia into a “step on me kween” wet dream). People were outraged, of course, and the blog ~apologized~ and said they were still learning.... then a new chapter included a scene of Nadia stepping on the Apprentice. 🙃

not to mention elle, on their twitter, made a passive aggressive “women can be doms?” tweet, trying to twist it into a “yr oppressing women” angle (when the issue is that women of color are always constantly portrayed as aggressive and domineering)

Now for a wombo combo of racism and Elle’s fetishization of mlm:

the devs have spoken at length of how Julian’s and Asra’s relationship was quite unhealthy. In a paid scene in Asra’s route, they’re depicted as Asra being disgusted w Julian touching him+Julian following Asra to his shop when Asra refused his offer to go with him (aka julian... stalked him lmfao).

.......... this scene is promptly followed by a highly sexual scenario where Julian’s pain fetish is played up. Remember how this game is rated PG-13? Me neither. Asra’s previous disgust with Julian is also forgotten, for some reason (and by some reason i mean Elle wants to make them fuck w/o buildup or logic).

Then Asra’s route has yet another paid scene dedicated to Asrian, even though he’s supposed to not even like Julian! And be head over heels with the Apprentice! But Elle just has to make these two be entangled despite insisting their relationship was not good for either of them!

Now here’s the kicker: Julian doesn’t have any paid scenes related to his romance with Asra. Note how it’s one of the brown LIs whose route is highjacked by the white LI, but not vice versa. Hmmmmm.

Now, on the topic of Asra: thearcanagame has said repeatedly that he’s nb and uses he/him pronouns, and promised (since last year) that there would be dialogue where he speaks about his gender

as of the making of this post such dialogue still does not exist

so basically asra is the nb to dumbledore’s gay: anyone who just plays the game w/o keeping up with the official blog has no idea of what asra’s gender is supposed to be.

aka he’s not nb. he’s just a cis guy. the arcana just doesn’t want to put its money where its mouth is, i dont care if elle is nb themself. the team made a promise which has not been fulfilled yet and i suspect will not be.

instead, our introduction to canon nb characters is... these two.

By “these two” i mean neither vulgora nor valdemar are even fucking human, and stick out like sore thumbs with their monstruousness.

so our nb rep is... non-human villains. a few books later one of Nadia’s sisters with they/them pronouns shows up, but that’s too little too late on top of the fact that we should’ve known Asra was nb from the first to begin with. It’s a fucking embarrassment and an insult.

at least two villains are visibly disabled (Lucio’s missing arm and Volta’s blind eye+intentionally asymmetrical face). Julian’s eye doesn’t count because, spoilers, he’s not lacking an eye and even if he was it’d still be hidden behind a dashing eyepatch instead of grotesquely displayed as a sign of his lacking morality.

BUT WAIT! IT DOESN’T EVEN END THERE!

The Arcana Exploits The App Business Model To Price Their Full Game at $500, $1000 if the three extra routes make it out, and they never delivered their Kickstarter rewards:

tl;dr: you heard me

the original price per route was planned on being $1.99

they took that “subject to change” really seriously, it seems, because now each route, once the game is fully out, is estimated to cost around $170 each.

both those screenshots are taken from this post which explains in detail just how truly scummy all of The Arcana’s business model and decisions are: https://mysticmicrotransactions.tumblr.com/post/174308723344/dishonesty-from-the-arcana

the tl;dr is basically what’s listed in the beginning of this section, but other highlights from that post are: the use of addictive gambling mechanics such the Wheel of Fortune, and the dazzling calls to action in the new mini-game.

something that The Arcana supporters forget (or choose to ignore) is the fact that for a long, long time the game did not have the mini-game or the log-in rewards for coins. Players depended only on the gambling of the WoF or paying absurd amounts of money for the new chapters.

the devs went from playing the victims who were unable of controlling prices to (as spoken of in the link from mysticmicrotransactions) saying the making of the game (a pathetic little app game backed by a studio and a kickstarter) justifies the prices

they also gave people false hope about maybe changing the prices in the future, all while bleeding money from loyal players in “micro” transactions

the arcana literally added a $99.99 coins option on their latest update

in case it hasn’t sunk in yet: you can pay a hundred dollars upfront to the arcana, and you still will not have access to the whole game

there is no defense to this

none

“it’s free stop whining” let me explain:

“spend months on end accumulating fake currency or pay hundreds of dollars up-front to be able to play” is a scummy business model no matter how you look at it

if i can spend $60 upfront to play an AAA game there’s no excuse to demand more than that for a game with much smaller and, honestly, inferior content

the combination of there being already far and few games featuring lgbt characters and characters of color AND the little cult of personality set up by Dana and Elle makes people feel that spending money to support them is an acceptable expense.

it’s not

manipulating people into spending ridiculous amounts of money and then claiming “it’s their choice” is just scummy business, baby, and thats all the arcana does

the devs are brats who instead of admitting $500 is absurd for a game instead write petty little caricatures into their game - like, lbr: dana, elle, if i could afford diamonds in my hair i wouldn’t have even bothered with your shitstain of a game

despite bragging that ppl would get the full story w/o needing to pay, the paid scenes are pretty much required - the first few books of julian’s route have no romance without accessing any of the paid options. you dont even get so much as a kiss in without handing coins over. many, many people were baffled when julian had a teary break-up scene when from their perspective they hadn’t even started building a relationship.

wow that’s more than i ever thought it’d be

and i’ve been aware of their bullshit for near a whole year now!

i don’t have much of a note to end this on, other than: the arcana just isn’t even that good. it suffers from weak writing, pathetic character development and above all actually harmful content. do not try to argue with me on any of these points unless you’ve read all of that, because whatever you have to say i’ve likely mentioned before. if you still are that determined to yell at a me on the internet, please preface your argument with the phrase “I’m a pee pee poo poo man” so I know you’ve read everything in here. thank you!

[lettering-is-my-music]

im high key jealous of how tumblr famous you are bc i've been posting my calligraphy for years and get one or two likes at the most and you're amazing at it but i can't help but be bitter :(

i mean i transferred from my fandom blog, which when i started had like. 6k followers probably. and i do p much any request someone sends me. people are much more likely to reblog a thing they specifically requested than a thing that you like yourself tbh. In the last week I’ve done over 150 requests alone--it is about quality, but sometimes it’s just “can you do a massive quantity of asks at once.”

the calligraphy tag can be kinda dead on tumblr, so the trick is to do calligraphy where you can tag something else--with me i do a lot of femslash related things, like when i made the “let emma frost fuck jean grey” piece. there are some people reblogging that for aesthetic of my piece alone, but the main reason why it was successful was because you take what people like and enjoy, and make it into something that is relatively rare--there isnt that much calligraphy out in fandom, esp for a rarepair.

you can see that i use a liberal amount of tags--although don’t spam. and by that by all means if it applies to your post use that tag and as many as you can, but people are going to be Annoyed if they keep seeing ur work when they shouldnt. you don’t get popular by putting stuff in the calligraphy tag--include it definitely, bc that’s how other calligraphy blogs can reblog your things but it’s the other tags that make you popular and get the Extra notes.

also i often will get less than 10 notes on a post that i worked hard on, and the absolute worst thing is when the person who requested free art from me doesn’t even like it, let alone reblog it--like i assume that if you request it it would go along with your brand enough to go on your blog, which is you, but no i will often post requests without a single reblog, or maybe a reblog from one person and not the original asker.

There was a story i saw on here--about a professor who did an experiment about making pots. One half of the class was instructed to make one pot per day, and to make that pot the perfect pot. The other half of the class was told to just make as many as they could in a single period. At first, the one a day pots were the best, but the professor began noticing by the end the same thing in every class--the half that practiced a ton by making multiple pots started to have the best pots. The practice and experience from making so many pots over and over and over again was the best one--and that’s part of why I do requests, and why I do so many during the year.

I might not be the best calligrapher, but I can do a lot extremely fast and because I practice so much I don’t get tired easily. I also am p privileged financially, so I can have a bunch of pretty inks that people enjoy.

with social media, it’s not necessarily a comparison in art skill so much as “how good are you at navigating this type of social media” and i’m gonna be frank my talent are sub par at best--trust me, i’m not exaggerating or putting myself down I practiced like 2 types of font for hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of hours and there are people just starting who require just a little bit more practice and they’ll be better than me. this is just practice--

but i do know fairly well how to navigate this hell site.

tl;dr i’m probably not a better calligrapher than you (i dont know who u are so nothing definitive) but I am probably better at social media

[galimatios]

fear thy fortune chatlog notes

thinking abt the underdeveloped au i have in that weird off color fantasy universe that i realized is probably similar in ways to bloodborne even before i knew abt bloodbornes plot but this is nice bc i can solidify parts of it and i can probably also combine it with the knights au i have

OK I FORGOT TO PUT A CW HERE BUT CW FOR ABUSE MENT AND GORE MENT

somewhere located in present day west asia slash east europe theres a country divided into numerous states in which princes and princesses (princex (poc)/princen/etc for gender neutral options) are perpetually in contest with eachother for the right to be the divine ruler of the country

monarchy is not guided by blood, rather the church is responsible for finding the chosen candidates via prophecy, fururesight, dream interpretation, etc, and these kids are taken from their homes and reared as royalty the nature of this country is ... severe. pain is a gift, proof that one is alive. much ceremony is based in sacrifice, bloodspill, bloodsports, and pain endurance. magic as practiced by the church is extremely powerful in terms of healing so almost all wounds can be healed provided the heart still beats its essentially one big huge freakish cult of a country that has customs that seem barbaric to outsiders

the divine ruler of each state is the princens, though more often than not their councils do most of the governing with the princen merely being a puppet figurehead. they go through rigorous training to sharpen their minds and endurance against all types of pain, so training includes physical, mental, emotional trials in which the princen is supposed to keep a clear mind, concentrate on mediation or some mantra, bearing whatever is thrown at them. additionally they receive the best training in both combat and politics as well as magic. not all princen can withstand the requirements ofc so they.. vary quite a bit in terms of stability/constitution. its a p sick system even without the knights added in bc thats super messed up

the knights essentially belong to their princens in heart body mind and soul, and each princen receives exactly one knight soulbound to them. they also undergo the same scouting process once the princen is identified, and they undergo similar training except theyre also essentially brainwashed into believing their entire purpose in life is to serve and protect their princen no matter what. obviously this aint healthy! knights delude themselves into it so hard theyll fight for the system that literally abuses them! but thats how cults work

that being said knights are extremely powerful. they act as the sole bodyguard of their princen and believe me you dont want to get inbetween a knight and their prince. they are known especially for their brutality when their lords are threatened. it is extremely common for limbs to be lost in skirmishes btwn assailants and a knight

this takes us to the games! which are essentially gladiator coliseum type bloodsport contests between knights of different princens. its a pretty big affair like how the Olympics are for us so the fanfare the cheering the everything is all there i prob dont need to describe it in detail but its very violent. its considered practice for the knights before the true battle-royale type event thats even BIGGER bc it determines who becomes god-king of the country. this time the princen join their knights in the battlefield and basically whoever is left standing is the new king

is it worth it? probably not bc i think being king actually means being killed to be sent up to the heavens bc god kings dont need bodies any longer in truth the entire debacle is a distraction set up by the church to keep the country under its own control. its super corrupt. the council behind every princen is actually made up of high ranking church members that convene regularly to manipulate the politics of the region

but thats mostly the governing sphere of this world. the commonfolk are removed from most of this violence aside from the indoctrination by the church and the messed up religion they practice. a lot of the belief system here relies on this concept of karma and fate over free will. fate is oppressive, cannot be changed, but god do they try that belief ties into how princen and knights are fated to be pairs, how princen are fated to either ascend to godhood or die trying

but there is one way to manipulate fates in this world there exists in independent of the church a monastery that practices the art of transferring karma. think of karma as a type of currency that can be spent, saved, used, etc. lots of good karma may be distributed amongst loved ones via a ritual headed by a monk, or bad karma can be "paid off" essentially. the amount of good/bad karma a person has directly affects their fortune and luck. this practice is more or less outlawed by the church but the monastery is slowly gaining power over the commonfolk and the church mostly leaves the poor folk to rot anyway- their agenda mostly concerns the monarchy

altho i can definitely see tensions rising with the witch hunting as influenced by the church. particularly nefarious visions may result in blame being thrown around and commoners getting killed for crimes they have yet to commit and thats thanks to the teachings of the church

anyway as of rn though the monastery is still pretty small but it is an old, ancient organization with magic that runs far deeper than the magic of the church. it is a much more subtle magic- monks practice little offensive magic (they are a nonviolent sort anyway) but the ability to exchange karma is rare and has far more reaching impact in the long run i imagine they have strongholds further to the east but anyway theres one trump card the monastic order has

a subsection of the order is dedicated to the keeping of miracles. and miracles are... monsters! they are semi-physical manifestations of literal suffering and the sheer emotional energy provided by them is enough to give miracles the power to.. well. perform miracles.

when a person dies in anguish, there is a chance that their bodies will not decompose the way they are meant to. instead they slowly dissipate, bodies turning coal black and ashen to the touch. these cannot be disposed of the normal way (curses, contamination, all kinds of horrible things happen) so instead these corpses get locked up inside brick cells within the monastery

once, one of these was opened only to reveal that the bodies were gone- only a humming, massive shadow that seemed to move as if made of flies or soot combined. and it spoke, too. this was the first miracle created it was discovered then that these creatures had immense power but could not leave the rooms they were imprisoned in, touch sunlight, and similarly they could not die

imagine like the witchs nightmares in pmmm and you get what its like to be a soul trapped in a miracle. u get to relive ur worst fears and regrets forever. it suck miracles also cannot direct their powers towards their own will, only the will of others. ofc they are still monsters and exact a price for their services, whatever it may be.

a meeting with a miracle does not come cheap or without consequence, bc although miracles can be performed, karma always rebalances itself in the end. monks tasked with guarding and curating the miracles are called gatekeepers and are often someone close to one of the souls trapped in the vortex anyway i think thats the basics of everything in there... i got an au w cyrus as a prince and alex as his knight and instead of sticking around for their inevitable deaths the pair run off into the countryside far far away

actually i think something went wrong in the ceremony. cyrus and alex win godkingship of then... something goes wrong. probably the whole die-to-ascend thing is a secret kept from the princen and the public and. alex does a thing a knight should not do a refuses to let the ceremony continue. and im p sure as soon as cyrus learns of the truth hes like haha well fuck that

then they spend the rest of their days actually experiencing what life is like outside of a freakish cult and my fucking feels

i think.. meanwhile the monastic order grows in influence and power making them the enemy of the church... and jonah (yonah in this au) sacrifices himself to the miracle containing his brother in order to give the miracle a corporal form. which means august and company now have a physical conduit for all that power they had.

bad news for the church! bc august was unrightfully killed bc of a prophecy saying that hed become a huge threat and a killer

funny how prophecies work!

so now hes out for blood and he probably uses his own charisma and power to stage a coup against the church and basically the country goes to hell and i think at this point cyrus thinks. i got out of there alive. i need to do something about this. so he and alex probably join in and become arbiters of the game esp since cyrus and alex were probably the best synced, most skilled prince/knight duo the church had seen up to that date so theyre very powerful. ofc theyre still only two people so i really wonder how theyll step in btwn these two opposing parties

augusts side isnt good either bc august... is only out for revenge and self interest. he has no interest in fixing the country or helping anyone in fact once august is firmly seated on the throne of power he probably declares himself god-king anyway the end game probably looks like augusts body (which is jonahs body) being destroyed and the miracle contained in it finally put to rest jonahs soul must have something to do with the exorcism process- theyve tried to exorcise miracles before and only ended up upsetting it into violent outbursts anyway thats enough rambling from me time to paste this all into a blog post

god what if august picked keith to be his knight. thats messed up. keiths so easy to manipulate and hed be such a wildcard of a knight. he has more magic potential than alex and hes faster on his feet. im imagining bloodlust frenzy almost hyena-like behavior. also i mostly just want to see keith being violent and evil and i have an outfit in mind that would look great with a little splash of red

think like minimalistic ouji but like all black and keith with knives and serving a clearly twisted (even more than usual bc of the miracle’s influence) august

god even better the aftermath of augusts death TIME FOR THE FUCKING FEELS TO KICK IN BC now Keith has no purpose/he FAILED to protect his king WHICH WAS HIS ONLY PURPOSE IN LIFE then alex coming in with cy and just no, you have inherent worth. what happened wasn't right im upset this is how alex and keith become family in this au

miracles i think in this case are definitely more of a means to an end i think narratively ie jonahs brother being killed and augusts soul being trapped within it- tho i think its a good tie-in into how the severe paranoid cultish way the society works ends up producing a lot of People Dying In Extreme Anguish

almost a buildup of sickness so to say.. a plague of the soul that's a cool avenue to go down tbh the idea that miracles are more like viruses spreading misfortune in the long run for some quick gain in this life but bc karma always collects her debts if i throw in some nice reincarnation that would effectively damn someone in their next life... that implies that this story may need to expand across different generations

mechanics being so much bullshit has happened in this country it houses multiple miracles whereas elsewhere its like one, or none, very few in their histories except possibly during wartime and famine

since magic is Exists in this it makes sense that the emotional energy combined w ambient energy would manifest in some kind of grotesque Being

oh no thats maybe why the church is manipulating things by purposely generating that emotional trauma in its society its producing unprecedented amounts of energy they can utilize as magic power oh  no thats super bad august would definitely take advantage of that bc hed definitely figure the truth out once hes back to being alive

im upset bc i think they use princens and knights to specifically create emotional energy

energy released upon death which typically happens after a knight/prince duo has been chosen... then the resulting STRONG ass char plague on their bodies are collected to make artifacts? yes

gems created from the ashen plague are embedded into a huge mandala that actually ... is the god-king itself

[confusedlucifer]

(1) (passionate, homosexual anonymous love letter) I think I've told you before, but I started following you before I left tumblr, and I come back to keep myself up to date on memes and art and pop culture, without the time suck of logging in and scrolling through my dash. (Thankfully you haven't changed your delightful username/url). You continue to be an excellent curator of posts, and I got into The Man From Uncle and The Adventure Zone bc of you, and will probably get into Mr Robot soon

(2) because what I trust your taste. You also post lovely art of your own, and you have a distinctive style that I enjoy. (Idk if you've seen The Road to El Dorado, but there's a character called Tzekel-Kan who's drawn with a distinctive nose/face structure. Every time I saw one of your paintings, esp of Kylo, I used to think of his nose, but now I just go 'oh cool, that's a Jane nose'. It shows up in a lot of your work, and I think it's great! ) 

(3) I think you're very creative and welcoming, and have good taste in music, and I'm glad you're in the fandoms you're in and making the art that you are. I don't think I agree with you on absolutely everything, but I'm still happy to see you post/reblog about things. I'm glad you're you and I'm glad you're trying to make the world a better place. This isn't an excessively homosexual letter, bc I just don't know enough about you personally I guess? But I'm bi and feel very gay about some of

(4) your art and posts, so I hope that counts. And I don't know if it's passionate enough, since honest appreciation/conversation and food is how I express passion, and I can't bake you cake. (Idk, poetry is pretty homosexual and passionate maybe? Should I start sending you poetry??) But I would like you to know that I think you're pretty wonderful and that I am extending good vibes and love towards you any day I read your blog. ☆♡☆♡☆

goddddd anon waking up to this made me so emotional youre such a good egg ;______; to actually address your lovely letter though

- you SHOULD get into mr robot! i dont know how much you care about hacking and computers and stuff bc its a big part of the show but at the same time, i know i dont care about it nor do i know anything about it and i still love the show and the characters so much? the latest season has been some of the best television ive ever seen tbh, mr robot has a really interesting and unique style of telling its story but most importantly the main cast of characters is just. so good.  (also diverse!)

- but also im v flattered you trust my taste/judgement that makes me v happy since it usually takes me like literal years to get my friends into anything ive p  much given up  :”D

- I LOVE ME A BIG NOSE!! also i love the road to el dorado!!! i often struggle w feelings abt how my art style isnt really that distinctive or original, i usually dont let it bother me bc i think its more important to learn the fundamentals rather than chase an original style but still i appreciate you saying that so much :”) seriously though i love big and bumpy and hooked and interesting noses so much!

-  and honestly i think anything open, honest and full of affection for another person is gay so you did great and i clutched my chest a lot reading this! i do love an accept poetry if you want to venture into that but im also just fine with regular talking that we should do if we dont already bc you sound lovely and like a friend! if youre not here that much you can find me on twitter or instagram or wherever (except discord bc i still dont know how it works and at this point im too afraid to ask) at the same @ :”)

[santafe1899-blog]

ykno what nvm answer all of them dickhead

fuck u 

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

u

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

outgoin

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

i see every1 i love p frequently tbh

4. Are you easy to get along with?

i reckon so

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

yeah i trust em to (if they aint all drunk themselves)

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

like 80% of the population

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

i reckon i got p good odds tbh

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

uhh helena cuz she just gave me a hug bless her

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

yes. deeply.

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

u

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

‘love u mom’

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

choose any from this

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

f u c k   y e s

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

ehhhh idk not rly

15. What good thing happened this summer?

so much?? bfs?? top surgery??? its been a good summer

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

give me

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

al wouldnt be cuddling me rn if i didnt

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

i dont even remember his name

19. Do you like bubble baths?

i dont have them often but theyre cool

20. Do you like your neighbors?

yeah theyre chill

21. What are you bad habits?

o god so many. drinkin paint waters prolly the worst one

22. Where would you like to travel?

santa fe

23. Do you have trust issues?

uhh nah

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

talkin 2 the ppl i love

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

well itll b GONE in 5 days SOO

26. What do you do when you wake up?

go back 2 sleep

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

nah

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

the bfs

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

uhh nah

30. Do you ever want to get married?

howd that even work

31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail?

we just tested n Yes

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

there r so many options wtf…the richest 2

33. Spell your name with your chin.

mjnac mjk

34. Do you play sports? What sports?

soccer 4 lyfe (im a forward)

35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

y would u ask me this

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

im shit at that tbh i always end up spillin. prolly my elementary school crush cuz i got over it in a week

37. What do you say during awkward silences?

i usually awkward laugh

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

uhhh… im tryina think a the similarities btwn the bfs…uhh…nice smile

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

somewhere w food

40. What do you want to do after high school?

art

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

nope

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?

m concentratin

43. Do you smile at strangers?

sometimes?

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

outer space

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

food. promise a seein the bfs

46. What are you paranoid about?

uhhh losin people

47. Have you ever been high?

yep

48. Have you ever been drunk?

yep

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

dont think so

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

navy blu

51. Ever wished you were someone else?

yeahh

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

i mean… appearance wise its already changin. but i reckon i cld prolly be less brash

53. Favourite makeup brand?

uhhhh idek know more than 2 makeup brands

54. Favourite store?

food

55. Favourite blog?

mine. uh jk like…the bfs? idk i only rly follow my friends n art blogs

56. Favourite colour?

blue

57. Favourite food?

mac n cheese

58. Last thing you ate?

a bagel

59. First thing you ate this morning?

pancakes

60. Ever won a competition? For what?

i won like 10 art competitions in elementary

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

bein a little shit once

62. Been arrested? For what?

vandalism rip

63. Ever been in love?

yeah i am rn

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

wed been datin for a month. we kissed then we both laughed

65. Are you hungry right now?

when aint i

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

theyre the same

67. Facebook or Twitter?

uhh twitter

68. Twitter or Tumblr?

tumblr

69. Are you watching tv right now?

nah

70. Names of your bestfriends?

medda, crutchie, albo, spot, davey, kath

71. Craving something? What?

when isnt it mac n cheese

72. What colour are your towels?

like… a few diff ones

72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

2

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

nah

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

uhh like…1? i didnt get 2 bring my childhood ones n i aint the kinda person 2 collect em

75. Favourite animal?

dogs tbh

76. What colour is your underwear?

black rn

77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

chocolate

78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

cookies n cream

79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

blue

80. What colour pants?

grey

81. Favourite tv show?

b99

82. Favourite movie?

hot fuzz

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

mean girls??? obv??? mean girls 2 was shit we all know that

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

mean girls

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

janis

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

nemo for sure

87. First person you talked to today?

crutchie

88. Last person you talked to today?

u

89. Name a person you hate?

u

90. Name a person you love?

you

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

yeah a lot

92. In a fight with someone?

not actively

93. How many sweatpants do you have?

too many (never too many)

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

prolly like..3

95. Last movie you watched?

spirit

96. Favourite actress?

m e d d a

97. Favourite actor?

idk a hot one

98. Do you tan a lot?

i tend 2 burn more

99. Have any pets?

theo

100. How are you feeling?

gay

101. Do you type fast?

moderately?

102. Do you regret anything from your past?

yeeeeah

103. Can you spell well?

im ok

104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

yeah

105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

fuck yeah

106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

uhh … yeah

107. Have you ever been on a horse?

yeah

108. What should you be doing?

payin attention 2 al

109. Is something irritating you right now?

yeah im hangin out w this rlly annoyin guy rn :/

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

yeah.

111. Do you have trust issues?

not rly

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

uhh theo

113. What was your childhood nickname?

id rly rather Not

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

yeah

115. Do you play the Wii?

i mean sometimes but we dont got one

116. Are you listening to music right now?

yeah we have a playlist on

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

yeah

118. Do you like Chinese food?

yeah

119. Favourite book?

football

120. Are you afraid of the dark?

as much as like, ny1 is

121. Are you mean?

sometimes?

122. Is cheating ever okay?

absolutely not

123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

nope

124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

nah, just lust

125. Do you believe in true love?

yeah

126. Are you currently bored?

nah

127. What makes you happy?

theo, paintin, the bfs, medda

128. Would you change your name?

been there done that

129. What your zodiac sign?

cancer

130. Do you like subway?

yeah sure

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

“we did this already”

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

al

133. Favourite lyrics right now?

tbh ‘cause I’m never going down, im never giving up, im never gonna leave, so put your hands up, if you like me, then say you like me.’ mean a lot rn

134. Can you count to one million?

i mean…probably?

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

“im straight”

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

closed

137. How tall are you?

5’10”

138. Curly or Straight hair?

i got str8 hair

139. Brunette or Blonde?

brunette by majority rules

140. Summer or Winter?

summer

141. Night or Day?

day

142. Favourite month?

july. 4 no reason…..

143. Are you a vegetarian?

nope

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

milk

145. Tea or Coffee?

ughh tea if i have 2. just give me a red bull

146. Was today a good day?

yeah

147. Mars or Snickers?

mars

148. What’s your favourite quote?

“it does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live”

149. Do you believe in ghosts?

yeah sure

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?

“Well – I don’ like sayin’ the name if I can help it. No one does.”

[0n-y0ur-left]

@machine-dove sent me a message yelling about my tags on this post and said I had to write the ficlet.

I’m always a slut for prompts, so...

The thing was, Steve would swear in the years that followed, he really felt like him and Bucky had been dancing around this for months.  They’d been best friends for years, for as far back as either of them could remember, but after the weirdness that had been middle school there’d been a charge there, a spark of something humming beneath the surface of their interactions that both excited and scared the hell out of them.  

Or out of Steve, anyway.  He’d finally gotten the nerve to admit - to himself and his friends and loved ones - that he had a thing for both girls and guys at the start of eleventh grade, and while he didn’t have dates of either sex lining up to ask him out, it had at least cleared the air between him and Bucky.  And when Buck had broken up with his last girl of the month, four months ago (not that Steve was keeping track), and they’d started constantly hanging out together again, like old times… well, there was a nasty little voice in Steve’s head that couldn’t help reading more into it.

Especially when Bucky insisted sharing milk shakes when they went out after school, or popcorn when they went to the movies, or letting Steve borrow his Varsity jacket when he accidentally/on purpose forgot to bring his own coat to the Homecoming game they’d gone stag to.  There was definitely something there, something more than Steve had ever dreamed of hoping for - but while one mean side of him liked to point out the possibility of his best friend becoming something even more, the other, meaner side always shut him down: making sure to remind Steve as harshly as possible just how delusional he was being.

Because Bucky, even if he was single, had never once expressed an interest in being with other guys.  And even if he had, Buck was so far out of Steve’s league that it wasn’t funny.  He was smart - honor council this year, top of their class since he’d first transferred to Brooklyn in elementary school - he was on student council, starting pitcher for the varsity baseball team as  a sophomore, a key player in every drama production Washington High had put on since he’d started there.  People were tripping over the opportunity to hang out with Bucky Barnes, never mind the chance to date him.  And Steve… Steve was just Steve.  Scrawny asthmatic with a chip on his shoulder, painfully average student and GSA representative.  He was a decent artist when people took the time to actually look at his work, and Bucky swore up and down that he was funny as hell, but for the most part Steve knew that the only reason he wasn’t regularly getting shoved in lockers anymore was because he was most famous for being Bucky Barnes’ best friend.

Steve was an idiot for even imagining that he had a chance with someone as perfect as Bucky, but he wasn’t so stupid that he’d go and risk something as important as their friendship by asking him out.

Besides, they hung out so often that Steve felt he could pretty safely pretend they were dating.  In the deepest, darkest corners of his mind.  And if ninety-nine percent of his schmoopy fan art of late was based on an AU of Clark Kent and Bruce Wayne as dorky high school boyfriends that maybe bore a little bit of a resemblance to the dumb shit that the two of them did together?  Well… no one needed to know.

It got more hits to his blog, at least.

That said, there were still nights when Steve’s stupid brain couldn’t help but wish.  So when Bucky had sent his text on the Sunday before the MLK Holiday, when Steve was already pouting about the fact that he couldn’t join him in their volunteer plans because his stupid head had decided to come down with a stupid cold, well… Steve couldn’t help feeling a little reckless.

Text from Bucky Received 09:32 PM

What do you wear to bed?

Steve had been staring at it for a solid thirty seconds, blinking and trying to convince himself that it really wasn’t the Nyquil that he’d taken earlier - that Bucky really was asking him that question.

He had to know how suggestive it was.  Steve had watched Bucky charm girls since they were in elementary school… he knew how to flirt, he knew how people took his words.  Which meant - he had to be flirting with Steve.  It wasn’t completely out of the blue, not really, but it still left Steve such a squirmy mess that he actually had to abandon his tablet on his desk and fall back onto his mattress to read it again.

Bucky had stayed over enough times over the years to know damned well that Steve usually just slept in whatever outsized summer camp t-shirt was cleanest in his drawer and either a pair of old boxers or ratty pajama pants; but he couldn’t very well say that.  Not in response to his first sext.

He bit the hell out of his lip, dismissing the thought as fast as he could, before  finally forcing his fingers to type out an answer.  

Text to Bucky Sent 9:34 PM

depends on the weather

if its summer just a black jock or smth ;)

He held his breath as the ellipses bubble appeared on Bucky’s side of the screen, rereading his response obsessively.  Best case scenario: Bucky really was flirting with him, and they could get it out of their systems the easy way… break the ice on a text screen, then make out like fiends in person the next time they hung out together.  Worst case scenario: Bucky would ask him what the fuck he was talking about and Steve would laugh it off as a joke.

He was golden.

He was really, really fucking hoping for the former - although as Bucky continued typing he couldn’t help but start panicking.

Text from Bucky Received 9:35 PM

k but what about like in the winter

do u wear warm pajamas?

What the fuck?

Steve actually started to type as much, but the rest of Bucky’s responses came in a flurry of messages.

Text from Bucky Received 9:35 PM

my mom is making me throw out my old superman pajamas and i kno theyre about ur size

i swear theyre not gross or anything

ill wash them before

if u want them

i just know u like superman and its dumb to throw them away

Steve finished reading the texts, dropped the phone onto his comforter, and covered his face in his hands because - oh God.  It was so painfully cute, so painfully Buck that he couldn’t help giggling, and immediately picked the phone back up to read the exchange again.

Before he could talk himself out of it, he took a screenshot and hit the share icon for his Tumblr account.  After a second’s debate he added the hashtag #Ur fav would NEVEr #This boy and posted it.

He rolled onto his side, staring at the screenshot and grinning like a crazy person… and then succumbed to the cold meds, finally.

Steve woke up coughing a short while later, blinking in confusion before realizing that he’d definitely fell asleep on top of his covers, with his damned contacts still in.  He reluctantly moved to the bathroom to pop them out (his eyes were already a sticky, awful mess, so leaving them in absolutely wasn’t worth how he’d feel in the morning), then stumbled back to his bed, groaning when he noticed the time on his alarm clock.

He face-planted back into his pillow, only to bash his nose against the cold, hard surface of his phone.  With a curse he moved the damned thing to his nightstand - then remembered how he’d fell asleep in the first place.  He knocked three books on the floor feeling for his glasses on the nightstand, but finally got them on his nose and pulled his phone screen close to his face, blinking in surprise when he saw his Tumblr app notifications.

With a little red bubble that read 1,000+ next to it.

Steve opened the app with shaking fingers, only to laugh out loud when he realized which post it was that had blown up.  He hadn’t imagined the interchange with Bucky, and apparently the entire damned internet was every bit as charmed as he’d felt.  A quick scroll through his inbox confirmed that at least fifty people thought they should get married.

Which… was probably jumping the gun, but was something that Steve couldn’t help preening over, just a little.

Text to Bucky sent 06:03 AM

I PUT THIS CONVO ON THE INTERNET

If nothing else, Buck would get a good laugh out of it in the morning, Steve figured with a giggle.

A giggle that stopped as soon as the blue check mark appeared next to Bucky’s name.

Text from Bucky received 06:03 AM

hmmmmm?

Steve - had definitely not expected Buck to be up yet, but he could hardly abandon the conversation now.

Text to Bucky sent 06:04 AM

I put this on tumblr.  U should see the responses!

It vaguely occurred to Steve that he probably should have asked for permission ahead of time, but it was Bucky.  And it wasn’t as if he’d said anything terrible - if anything, Steve came out looking like the pervy idiot.

Besides, none of their classmates would guess that this random Bucky on the internet was their Bucky: no one outside of their immediate friend group knew that Buck was such a dork, or would believe it in the first place.

Text from Bucky received 06:04 AM

is that ur art site?

Steve hid his grin behind his hand.  His art site.  Please…

Text to Bucky sent 06:04 AM

yeah sort of.  i post on it sometimes

it got huge responses!

more than any drawings :P

PS how old r these pjs?  if they r gonna fit me? XD

Text from Bucky received 06:04 AM

shit

Steve’s heart sank in his chest as the ellipse button appeared immediately under Bucky’s response.  He was in the middle of stumbling out of bed to retrieve his laptop to delete the damned thing when his phone chimed again.

Text from Bucky received 06:05 AM

i lied to millions of ppl on the internet

my mom isnt making me throw my pajamas out

i saw them at target

Steve was about to laugh and make a snarky reply about the ‘millions’ part (he had a grand total of five hundred twenty-three people following his crappy fan art blog, but Bucky always was one for dramatics) but the rest of Bucky’s rant stopped him cold.

Text from Bucky received 06:05 AM

they were on sale tho

i know we already did xmas presents

they just made me think of u

Steve’s smile was so wide his face ached.  The ellipses kept coming.

Text from Bucky received 06:06 AM

no they werent

they werent on sale

thats another lie

sorry tumbler

can they see this now???

Steve was dying.  Bucky was going to actually kill him with adorableness, and he didn’t even seem to realize it.  After smothering a squeal in his pillow Steve got his shit together and started typing back.

Text to Bucky sent 06:06AM

nope! no worries ;)

He gnawed viciously on his bottom lip as he typed up his follow up, started to delete it twice, then finally manned up and hit send.  

Steve was a lot of things, but he sure as hell hoped he wouldn’t ever be called a coward.

Text to Bucky sent 06:07 AM

i got about 50 message overnight tho

they all say i’ve gotta marry you XD

The emoticon, Steve decided when he saw the blue checkmark beneath it, was a nice touch.  If Buck freaked out now, he could just laugh the whole thing off as a joke.

(he wasn’t laughing while the ellipse bubble flashed next to Bucky’s name ten billion times in the next two minutes)

Text from Bucky sent 06:08 AM

we should prob start with coffee first

if ur feeling better i can pick u up tuesday?

is seven okay?

Steve stared at his phone for a solid thirty seconds, gaping in shock, before pressing the call button next to Bucky’s name with shaking fingers.  Seven was perfect, but he could hardly trust himself to type as much.

[lapetitepersonne]

I never see my mentions ugh..... anyway, thank you @jenesuispastonchien​ for tagging me :D I love these ask things !

1. why did you choose your url?

There is this book named Ma famille normale contre les zombies that I really love and there is a character nicknamed La Petite Personne and since I’m a little person/une petite personne too, I stole it :P

2. any side-blogs? if you have them, name them and why you have them.

Idk if that counts bc they are not side blogs but whole ass blogs (bc I dont understand/like how side blogs work) but I have an aesthetic one (where I go every 4 months), it’s @passionmiel, and an art blog I created a few days ago which is not very popular :’) but I dont really care, I’m just happy to draw again (it’s @lapetitemarque and I really need to learn how to adjust colors for different screens bc the first drawing I did is atrocious on my phone while the colors are good on computer I’m :o( )

3. how long have you been on tumblr?

Since 2014-2015 I think ? I had a blog dedicated to 19 days (by Old Xian) before azkgerfgrekg (and I was quite popular : people loved my broken english or my dumb french jokes I think)

4. do you have a queue tag? Nope

5. why did you start your blog in the first place?

Because I like tumblr for all the art, gifs, funny interactions, etc etc and I wanted to have a place to reblog it (and to archive the things I like...... thats why I always tag the posts I reblog haha)

6. why did you choose your icon/pfp?

It’s a mood

7. why did you choose your header?

It’s a gif I made of Roger Taylor aka Rogerina’s pretty legs :) (in the iconic I Want To Break Free video)

8. what’s your post with the most notes?

The one about how bi women want to top men and want to be topped by women haha (I still stand by it)

9. how many mutuals do you have? Not a lot, I think ? ~10 maybe ??

10. how many followers do you have?

123 (and 80 of them are probably porn bots akzgerkeg)

11. how many people do you follow? 352 (more than half of them are not posting anymore :()

12. have you ever made a shitpost?

Yeah, a little.... I used to, in french

13. how often do you use tumblr each day?

So often, it’s embarrassing

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once? who won?

Nah, never. I will probably never do it because I find it kind of ridiculous tbh (I mean, come on : arguing on tumblr ? that’s the sign you need to get a life :/). Also, when I actually talk on posts, I always try to be the most polite and kind because, since english isnt my first language, I can never really know how my words translate to english speakers...... idk anyway I dont have the energy or the time to fight with people on the internet

15. how do you feel about “you need to reblog this” posts?

Hate them, don’t read and don’t reblog precisely because there is this fucking sentence (also there is always some passive agressive crap under and I’m not here for it)

16. do you like tag games?

I LOVE THEM ?? I’ve only been doing them since @jenesuispastonchien started tagging me (ouin merci ;;;) but I’ve always been a little jealous of all these people tagging each other and answering questions and everything, it seemed fun ! And I love to read the answers of other people/mutuals

17. do you like ask games?

Yeah, same thing that for the answer above : I’m a little jealous of people doing them (it seems fun) but I’ve never dared to do them bc I dont think there are enough people following me to ask me things haha

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

No idea...... but now I’m curious

19. do you have a crush on a mutual?

Nope (no offence but I barely keep up with who is who in my mutuals.... I’m sorry....... I thought we all did this and that the whole ‘crushing on your mutual’ thing was a joke.....)

20. tags?

@lemonysharkbait @dandeedann @stansayshi @luova-lola @oktobearfest @antsuke42s1 @underskiescomets @thefooldoththinkheiswise @chizuru-world @dirtyburito @youdontknowmesis

Even if I havent tagged you, dont hesitate to do it too :D (agkzgkerk I should tag all my followers the next time I do that, it wouldnt take me that long)