#at least the last order performance video is high enough quality to listen to

[superfluouskeys]

dino release official audios of your solo songs challenge!!!!!

[finn-wolfhard]

I need me some quality content and this is the best place for it. Could I get some being Steve's sister and dating Robin? (If that already exists somewhere then please direct me to it bc this idea is like crack to me) Thanks!!

Yo! I've just gotten back into Tumblr since quarantine has given me an abundance of time. I can guess that you ended up getting this elsewhere, anon, but for the folk who also want to read about wlw Robin B and Big Bro Steve - this ones for you! 

Enjoy x

I Do 

“Turn that shit down! GOD! I feel I’m listening to them in concert.” Steve was screaming from downstairs for me to turn my music down and before I could move an inch to do so, he barged through the door. “Look, I don’t want another complaint from Mrs. Fritz next door. Can you please turn it down. I promised mom and dad that the roof would still be on this place by the time they got home. I’m heading to work. The money for delivery is on the table. Just try not to get yourself into bother, OK?” 

“Yeah, sure, sorry Steve. What time will you be home?” our parents are both out of town on business and so Steve has been appointed man of the house. Last time we were left alone, Mrs. Fritz called the police on us, placing a noise complaint. It was just me playing my radio a little bit too loud in my room. My bedroom window is right next to her living room. 

“I’ll be home around 8. Do you want to wait till I’m home to order pizza?”

“Sure thing, dude” I answered, giving him a thumbs up and a grin.

“You’re a goof. I’ll see you at 8.”

Steve and I’s relationship is reasonably good for the average brother and sister. He’s a year older than me and has the same interests. Such as; Hair, Pizza, our looks, and girls. I’ve known I’ve been into girls since I was a little kid but dad would kill me if I ever brought a girl home. Mom would be a little more understanding, yet still against the idea - and I don’t even know how Steve would react if he found out. I think he’s the only person I’d be fully comfortable telling, but I don't want to risk it going the complete opposite way.

I hear the door slam and decide to get out of my pajamas and actually DO something today. The schools broke up for summer last week and all I’ve been doing is reading, listening to music, and waiting for my best friend Jennifer to get home from vacation and tell me all about it. She’s due home in three days. I finally muster up enough self-motivation to move from my cozy, pink bed to the bathroom. The cold tiles under my feet wake me up and I stare at myself in the mirror for a bit. I had managed to grow a little spot just below my hairline (which I quickly treated with zit cream) but that was about as far as the flaws went. I usually take good care of myself; drinking enough, taking my vitamins, brushing my teeth after every meal. I do care about my looks and I shouldn’t be ashamed of that. It helps gets me a lot of attention in school, and I’ve never been an outcast. I guess having Steve as a big brother does contribute to the high school fame, but I don’t let it get to me much. I'm just glad I’ve gotten through high-school without being bullied at least once. I looked at my scraggly hair. I had just had a perm done two weeks ago and it seemed to be holding up pretty well. I scrunched my hair to make it look nice and messed it up a bit to give it volume. 

In the kitchen, there was the money on the table, like Steve said, and a note next to it. 

Save me a slice! Steve :)

He must’ve written the note then realized that a slice won't suffice after a long shift at his dorky Scoops Ahoy! job, and asked me to wait up for him. It's a shame people don’t get to see this side of Steve and I. I know how we come across to other people. I’ve heard the odd remark here and there about how he’s a player and I’m a priss. It mostly comes from the social outcasts in the school, the ones who aren’t in our friend circles, and don’t get to see what we’re really like. Even then, our school personalities are a bit of a performance to uphold our popularity. Only Steve knows my real self and vice verses, and we both understand why it has to be like that. Its an unspoken rule type thing. 

I open the fridge and get some milk for cereal. I pour a bowl of Fruity Pebbles. Fred smiles at me from the box as I grab the phone off the wall and dial Amanda’s number. 

“Hey Mands, you want to go to the mall today”

“y/n! Hi! That sounds great. I need a new outfit for my date with Justin on Friday.”

“Cool, so, 12? That sound ok?”

We agreed on 12:30 (since she had to take her dog on a walk) and she suggested we meet outside the Gap. Soon enough, 12:30 rolls around and I see Amanda smiling wildly at me, where she said she'd be, outside the Gap. She sweeps me into a warm hug and we gush about how much we’ve missed each other since school broke up. 

“Ok, so I need to go to Claires to get some earrings.” I agree to help her find a pair that would, quote “make Justin harder than math.” I don’t really understand how a pair of earrings could do this to a guy, or even if guys pay attention to earrings at all, but I was open to being proved wrong. We start making our way to the stairs when Amanda realizes she’s suddenly craving ice cream. I put it down to the fact that there were Scoops Ahoy! Adverts on every trash can (I’m unsure if that is a sign or not). We make a detour to Steve’s work and I make a plan to pull a few strings to get a free cone or two. We enter the ice cream parlor and… Steve isn’t there. Instead, a girl with short blonde hair is serving the queue of customers. 

I squint at her, trying to remember her name. Rosie? No, that's not it. It begins with an R for definite. Its to do with an animal… a R-R-Robin! Her name is Robin. And she’s…pretty? Like, really pretty. And not very girly? I can’t tell since she’s wearing a silly uniform… but god, is she pretty. 

As I’m staring at her, a slew of slurs come racing into my mind. Slurs I panicked were being shouted at me down the halls but never were. They were always aimed…at her. At Robin. Words beginning with D and F that make my blood boil. Chip, A boy in my own friend group, muttering “Stay away from my sister, homo!” In class. I put a hand up to my mouth to hide a gasp. This girl was outed, by someone she thought was her friend from band, in Hawkins - which isn’t known for being the most accommodating and accepting town.

Amanda and I reach the front of the queue and I find myself unable to look directly at the girl serving me. 

“Hi! Welcome to Scoops Ahoy! What can I get you today?” She seemed overly enthusiastic for some reason. 

“Hi, is Steve here?” I say, breaking the awkwardness I had built up in my own mind. She looked away, disheartened? I couldn’t tell. 

“Steve, your sisters here” then she whispered something that sounded like “you can leave your little nerd friend to figure it out for a bit” but I wasn’t really sure. 

Steve appeared from around the corner.

“what do you want, squirt?” 

“2 sundaes please” I replied, smiling.

“that will be five dollars pleas-“

“STEVE! Can’t you gift your baby sister with a sundae for once?” I cut him off, appalled that he’s making me pay, but still keeping it lighthearted. 

“…fine. But only this ONE TIME” he shot back. I winked at him, thanked him, and waited for him to finish our sundaes. He brought them over and sat with us. 

“Who’s that girl?” I instantly questioned, trying not to sound too interested but failing miserably.

“Oh, that's Robin Buckley. She’s in your year at school, don’t you know her?” I do know her. But I don’t want to admit that yet, I want to play it cool.

“I think I’ve seen her around yeah, I’ve just never had a good look at her before. I think she’s in my social studies class?” I look to Amanda to ask this question but Amanda is already nodding by this point. Steve looks unconvinced. 

“well, I invited her for pizza tonight,” he said, not wanting to ask ‘is that ok?’ In front of Amanda to keep up his macho ‘I’m Steve Harrington’ persona. I glance over at Robin. By this time, she’s known as lovely Robin in my head. Not that I could help it, along with the butterflies in my stomach or the extreme excitement that she was going to be having dinner. With me. In my house. Tonight!… What am I doing? Get a grip of yourself! You’re not out - as if that is ever going to happen anyways - and Robin was coming for Steve. Of course she was. I mentally roll my eyes. Just my luck.

The rest of the day goes by pretty quickly. Amanda gets her outfit and ‘math’ earrings - which I still don’t understand - and I get a few cute t-shirts and skirts thanks to my allowance mom gave me before she went away. By the time I get home, it is 4 pm which means I have precisely 4 hours to get myself ready for tonight. I go to my room, read for a bit, then put my makeup on in my vanity mirror. I don’t want to mess this up, but then again, why am I caring so much?. I eventually get myself sorted and wait for 8 pm to roll around. At 7:45 I phone Hal’s Pizza Shop and order 2 pepperoni pizzas and 1 plain Margherita. I came to the decision that If Robin is vegetarian then she can have the just cheese, but if not, I’ll take it.  

I hear Steve’s key in the lock and he shouts to me from downstairs.

“Hey that's me back, y/n, did you order the pizza?” 

“Sure did!” I came to the top of the stairs and looked down at the front door. Robin was staring up at me and I couldn’t help staring at her back. Steve obviously missed this whole exchange of tension.

“Good! Because I’m starving. I’m gonna put a video on, anyone down for watching Indiana Jones?” He mimics a whipping sound and runs off to the living room, leaving Robin and me to awkwardly start a conversation. 

“So, you work with Steve. I’ll apologize on your employer's behalf.” I laugh, eventually. Robin looked relieved that I had said something, and even more so that it was a joke. 

“It's not as bad as you would think, he brings in loads of customers with that ‘magnificent hair’” she replies, making fun of Steve’s obsession with his, admittedly, perfect mane. 

“I’ve seen you about school before, sorry I’ve never talked to you before,” I said. I really meant it, she seems cool. And kinda hot? But that wasn’t important to me…

“Yeah, I guess our groups don’t tend to mix as much. I'm surprised you even know my name” she looks at her feet. She knows I know about the slurs and bullying, I can tell. Just then, there's a ring at the door and Steve reappears, running to get the door that we are standing 2 inches away from. 

After sitting, eating, chatting, and laughing our way through Indiana Jones, I realise Steve has fallen asleep beside me. So does Robin. We both snicker at him and then collectively tuck him in with the blankets on the back of the sofa. We sit in silence for a minute. 

“Robin. I want to say I'm sorry for all the stuff you get called at school. It's not cool and especially from my group-“

“it's fine” she cuts me off. She seems distant though. 

“I don’t think you understand what it does to me hearing people shout words like that at someone. It's inhuman,” Robin looks at me over her cup of hot chocolate Steve made us halfway through the movie. She looks on the verge of tears. “I mean, I don’t know how I would cope with that if people knew I was one too.” I look away from her confused stare in embarrassment. Robin is the first person I tell this massive secret to and I've only been in her company for the past 3 hours? But it felt right. It felt too right, almost.

Robin picks herself up from her space in the armchair and comes to sit on the arm of the sofa. She doesn’t hesitate to put her arm around my shoulders and squeeze me in for a side hug. I hadn’t realized that I had started to cry and I wipe my eyes and nose with the back of my hand. 

“I’m so sorry they said those things to you” I whispered while silently sobbing.

“Don’t worry about it, y/n, I have pretty thick skin when it comes to bullying. I've been in band for the past 3 years,” I look at her and let out a small laugh. The smile fades from her lips and a serious look takes over her face. “You don’t need to feel ashamed. Or embarrassed. I’m honored you told me, I know how much trust that takes. Thank you.” 

We sit embracing for a couple of minutes and I try to defuse the tension. “You know, I think you’re pretty hot.” She laughs, and I can feel the heat radiating off of her. She’s blushing. 

“You’re not too bad yourself, Harrington,” she gives me a small smile. “I think you’re the prettiest girl in our year.” Now it was my turn to blush. I’m not sure if she’s saying this out of courtesy, sympathy, or if she really means it. 

“You don't have to say that” I roll my eyes and let out an embarrassed giggle. 

“I do.” She whispers back, the darkness multiplying the tension by 10. After a while of nervous silence, not sure what to say next, Robin asks you a question.

“I hope I’m not out of line for saying this, and you can one hundred percent say no,” I looked at her, questioningly, “but why don’t we go out sometime? We can go to the park or we can go to the cinema. Your choice… if you want-if you want to.” She was visibly nervous. In the pitch black, with only the dim glow from the paused movie TV static lighting up the room, I agreed to go on a date with her (”I’d like that”). We both can tell the other is excited but can also tell the other is exhausted. Robin moves back over to the armchair, which was just big enough for a teenage girl to curl up in, and I curl up to my sound asleep brother. It takes a while to finally get to sleep, but I can’t help my mind doing laps, thinking about my future date with Robin Buckley. 

[ihearthorror]

My Top 10 Favourite Horror Films of 2020

Every January, most people who review or talk about movies on YouTube tend to piece together a Top 10 list of their favourite movies from the year prior. In order to stand out from the crowd (and also because I was too lazy to do this sooner), I decided to wait until March, by which time most YouTubers aren’t really talking about movies from 2020 anymore.

I know what you’re thinking: sounds kinda stupid – why would anybody care about a Top 10 list of the best movies of 2020…THREE months into the new year!? Well, as you’ve likely heard, 2020 was a year like no other, and as result of the ongoing global pandemic, movie release dates from 2020 were pushed back months, sometimes multiple times. Some films that were supposed to be released last year didn’t arrive until 2021, even though they’re officially considered “2020 films,” according to their profiles on websites like IMBD and Letterboxd.

And so, some of these so-called “2020 films” were not available (at least to me) until only recently, such as Saint Maud or The Dark and the Wicked. I feel like I’ve now had a chance to see almost all of the horror films I’ve wanted to see from last year. In this video, if you care to stick around, I will share with you my Top 10 favourite horror films of 2020. So, here we go…

#10/ The Dark and the Wicked:

A sister and brother return to the family homestead where their father is slowly dying and their mother is understandably distraught but also disturbed and distant. The siblings soon realize that something evil has invaded their family home as they are terrorized by whatever is slowly killing their father. Directed by the same guy behind 2008’s The Strangers, The Dark and the Wicked is at times bleak and unsettling, and it does a good job at keeping you intrigued in this family’s unnerving conflict. However, it felt a bit rushed and undeveloped at other times, and its ending left me somewhat unsatisfied.

#9/ Relic:

Soon after Kay and her daughter Sam return to their remote family home following the disappearance of the family matriarch, the widowed Edna, they discover that something sinister has taken hold of both Edna and the house itself. Although Relic – which was co-produced by Jake Gyllenhaal and marked the feature directorial debut for Natalie Erika James – isn’t exactly offering up any enticing twists or salacious gore, or even a original concept for that matter, it relies on evoking dread and building tension to compel its audience to stay invested until the bitter end.

#8/ Amulet:

Taking its sweet time to unravel, Amulet is centered around Tomaz, an ex-soldier who is now homeless but is offered a place to stay at a decaying house in London, which is inhabited by a beautiful young woman named Magda and her dying mother. As the story moves along, we see that Tomaz is starting to develop feelings for Magda, who seems a bit…off. His feelings for her don’t wane even after Tomaz discovers that there’s something insidious going on in the attic of the house, where Magda’s mother is seemingly imprisoned. Toss in a suspicious nun and you’ve got yourself a creepy little film that seems to have fallen between the cracks.

#7/ The Beach House:

One might argue that not a lot actually happens in The Beach House and that the payoff isn’t worth the investment, but if you go into this film with an open mind and zero expectations, you should at least be satisfied. Two troubled college students head to a deserted beach getaway to spend some time together, but end up struggling to survive alongside some unexpected guests as a mysterious infection disrupts their holiday. Although it is a slow build up to the film’s climax, it is a tense and intriguing ride along the way, as a series of unsettling events give way to an apocalyptic episode that feels almost like a throwback to the sci-fi films of the 1950s. Making his feature film directorial debut, Jeffrey A. Brown elicits with The Beach House those brooding existential thoughts that lay dormant in the deep boroughs of our minds. 

#6/ The Invisible Man:

There’s always an elevated risk when making a modern film based on an old story that has already been told through cinema numerous times before. The last time H.G. Wells’ 1897 novel The Invisible Man had been adapted by Hollywood was in 2000’s Hollow Man, which was panned by critics despite making a sizeable profit. The 2020 adaptation is far superior and is perhaps the best adaptation of Wells’ classic in any medium. Elizabeth Moss gives a stellar performance that draws real emotion, so that we agonize alongside her as she is essentially haunted by a relentless ghost hellbent on controlling every aspect of her life. We live in an era when technology has advanced enough to bring this 124-year-old story to life like never before, while a polished script and an exceptional lead performance gives The Invisible Man a deeper level of emotion and terror.

#5/ Saint Maud:

For most of Saint Maud it is unclear whether certain experiences are actually happening in reality for the main character or if it’s all simply in her head, as some sort of mental breakdown caused by a work-related tragedy. Maud is a young hospice nurse and a newly-converted Roman Catholic who suddenly becomes obsessed with “saving the soul” of the woman she is currently taking care of, Amanda, a hedonistic dancer with a chronic illness. Maud’s behaviour worsens, as does her mental state, as horrific scenes and visions make us question if she’s actually losing her mind or experiencing something beyond this world. Saint Maud is an A24 feature by the way, so that should be enough to know what you’re getting here in terms of quality.

#4/ The Lodge:

Isolation is often embraced as a way to pad a horror film’s fear factor, and it works especially here in The Lodge, as a soon-to-be stepmom becomes stranded at a remote holiday home in the middle of winter with her fiance’s two children. The kids begin to untangle the dark past of their stepmom-to-be and a series of disturbing events transpire as their hope for survival fades. The Lodge is a dreary, atmospheric slow burn that leaves you somewhat unsettled. With its wintry backdrop, stylish sequences, and almost claustrophobic dread, the film doesn’t ever allow its audience to feel at ease for long, insisting that an underlying foreboding remain intact throughout. Although I found the ending somewhat disappointing, I immediately began to concoct a possible prequel that would delve into the backstory of the film’s lead character. One can hope.

#3/ Host:

It’s increasingly difficult to be innovative and original when it comes to horror films these days, especially in the particular genre of so-called “found footage.” Rob Savage’s Host, however, comes off as something different, setting itself apart from most films in this realm in various ways. It centers around six friends who hold a séance via Zoom during a COVID lockdown, guided (at first) by a medium they hired. The séance then takes a dark turn and things soon escalate into madness. Sure, there are elements in Host that are prevalent in numerous horror films, but it uses a modern and topical way to implement them, while also refusing to overstay its welcome by cueing the credits less than an hour in. Overall, this film’s popcorn-and-Saturday-night-movie fun factor is why it ranks so high on this list.

#2/ Possessor:

It’s always a treat to come across an original idea, especially when it’s within the horror realm, and Possessor is certainly unlike anything else I’ve seen in awhile. Andrea Riseborough plays an elite corporate assassin who uses brain-implant technology to take control over other people’s bodies in order to kill high profile targets, though with every mission she gets further and further away from her true self. With her latest possession, she becomes trapped in the mind of a man who threatens to obliterate her for good. It is a provocative vision by director-writer Brandon Cronenberg, who just so happens to be the son of legendary Canadian filmmaker David Cronenberg, and it serves as a disturbing piece of dystopian fiction that is even more frightening because it isn’t too far beyond belief.

And because everyone else is doing it, here are five honorable mentions that narrowly missed the list:

- The Call

- Color Out of Space

- Don’t Listen

- The Mortuary Collection

- Porno

#1/ His House:

In addition to its emotional storytelling and genuine moments of terror, His House – from first-time director Remi Weekes – sheds a light on the plight of refugees in a way that feels both respectful and empathetic. After a Sudanese couple make a harrowing escape from their war-torn homeland, they are granted asylum in England, where they struggle to adjust and fit in. They are assigned a shabby house on the outskirts of London, where the couple begin to experience terrifying and unexplainable events. His House is built around a fresh concept, two fantastic leads, and some truly haunting imagery, and I wish that more horror directors would put as much effort into quality filmmaking as Weekes did here. If this is his first venture into feature filmmaking, I am excited to see what his future has in store. 

There you have it, my Top 10 favourite horror films of 2020. What did you think and were any of these titles on your own Top 10 list? Please tell me your thoughts and recommendations in the comments below.

[some-creep]

Song of the Ancients SERIOUS REVIEW(s)

I was told to review every version of Song of the Ancients, so I did. I tried to stick to things that were released officially but I’m sure I’m missing some. I know there’s going to be a new version on the Orchestral Addendum that’s supposed to come out this month. Also I don’t know a fucking thing about music so this is literally 3 pages of straight rambling. Also they’re not really in any kind of order other than Nier Gestalt, Nier Automata, and Other.

Song of the Ancients: Devola - https://youtu.be/qCKEXPXtrEU

This is it, the first version of Song of the Ancient’s you’ll ever hear, and also the last. At least in Nier Gestalt. It’s a classic, and Devola has no idea what the words to it mean. And neither do we. But it perfectly sets the tone. It’s nostalgic, it’s sad, it’s mysterious, it’s sad but written a second time. I love Devola and would die for her. It isn’t my absolute favorite rendition of the song, but I can’t deny its importance. This is the one that gave us the rest. 9/10

Song of the Ancients: Popola - https://youtu.be/IZdnJLdmRlI

This song makes a showstopping appearance in Automata where it and the library meant nothing to me or anyone else because no one actually played Gestalt before Automata, let’s face it. The more subdued of the two character versions of the song, which, y’know, makes sense. Maybe a bit disorienting and trance like if you turn it up far enough and close your eyes. Sometimes I like this version a lot more than the Devola version, sometimes I don’t. It also gets a 9/10 for being a classic.

Song of the Ancients: Hollow Dreams - https://youtu.be/fxmP4eCFR4U

I fucking love this one. The Devola and Popola duet we all wanted with none of the… extreme angst. I also read a really good fan fiction once where [REDACTED] and it started with this performance so it ranks really high for me. It has a great sort of tavern energy to it (which, no shit, right?) and I don’t know. I don’t know I really love this one. The harmonization, the piano, the percussion, it all just works. 10/10

Song of the Ancients: Fate - https://youtu.be/ady--PNMsfI

My most unpopular opinion on this song is I don’t really like this version all that much. I don’t know why. Maybe it’s because I knew what happened already so it has no impact on me. It’s got a lot of drum. Maybe too much drum? I don’t know I’ve never totally vibed with this one. There’s an attempt but parts of it I just really don’t care for. That’s why it ranks so low.  It’s not the worst, and I recognize that it’s like. Super iconic. But eh. 5/10.

Song of the Ancients: Lost Androids - https://youtu.be/CfCEueBER5g

I just. Super. Do not fucking like this song at all. There’s so much happening in it and none of it’s very good. Devola and Popola’s sick techno dance party dot mp3. Easily the worst of the official releases of this song. It doesn’t help that the Nier Gestalt DLC just isn’t good either. Why did I beat the entire thing? The world may never know. 3/10

Song of the Ancients: Piano version from 15 Nightmares & Arrange Tracks

- https://youtu.be/orEoq7KFdrM

I’m biased and love all piano remixes and this one is good. I don’t know why there are two official piano remixes that aren’t the same, but there are. This one feels really emotional, sorta soft, and a lotta sad, but the remix-y part in the middle kinda falls off for me. Most of it is really good, but it doesn’t reach goosebump status for me which is a shame because most of the pieces are there. Overall, it’s pretty good. 7/10

Song of the Ancients: from the actual Nier Piano collection mix which is a different version than the one above - https://youtu.be/K_4HGh7Hh7w

It’s weird to think that two officially released piano versions of the same exact song could be so different but they honestly kinda are. This one feels stronger than the other, but it still isn’t quite there for me either. I think overall I might like it more, but the emotional impact of it is somehow less? Once again, it’s overall pretty good, but the vibes don’t totally match with me. 7/10

The Legend of Nier 8-bit Heroes from 15 Nightmares & Arrange Trakcs - https://youtu.be/LgvF_xRPoxs

This is kind of a bonus mention because it isn’t strictly Song of the Ancients, it’s a mix of a few songs from Nier Gestalt, but it just happens to start with Song of the Ancients. It hits pretty much all the notes from it so I’m including it here. I like it more than the hacking track from Automata, but only a little bit. It’s sad but also chiptune. However because it is quite literally only 1/8th of the entire song and for the sake of this list I refuse to acknowledge the other 7 minutes of music, I give it 1/8 / 10.

Song of the Ancients: Atonement - https://youtu.be/wNWShKuopic

You know it, you love it, and you’re crying thinking about it, it’s the Atonement version from Automata. It’s everything Fate wanted to be, but now much, much better. All of the music in this game is just, so intense and full of meaning and it just feels. Important. It’s what movie music would be if it didn’t suck. I think this one works really well in capturing the emotions around the twins trying to make up for crimes they straight up just didn’t commit. Devola and Popola make me cry. I love this song. Crying Creep emoji/10

Sonc of the Ancients: Atonement: Hacking Track remix - https://youtu.be/QD1F-staPms

So there’s like, not really a chance you’d ever hear this entire thing played out in game because of the way the hacking mechanic works. I think it’s a pretty good chiptune rendition though. I don’t care to listen to most of the hacking tracks on their own though, but there’s nothing offensive about this one. It’s Atonement, and Atonement is still a really good song on it’s own, so it just gets more points by cheating. 7/10

Song of the Ancients: from Arranged & Unreleased Tracks - https://youtu.be/lDYc9Ov4Mr8

Kinda love this one. It’s played on an accordion. Everyone I send this one to thinks it’s weird because of that, but I love it. It sounds like a romantic date in Italy. This might be one of the only versions that doesn’t make me want to start crying which is weird because it’s a remix of the Atonement version specifically again. I have really weird taste in music though. 10/10 gay dates in Italy

Song the Ancients: Atonement: from the Nier Music Concert: The Memories of Puppets - https://youtu.be/4z3wr0xATJY

Once again, Atonement fucking slaps. I’m always impressed by these things being performed live because the words aren’t real and they sound like they’d be hard to say. This is basically just a clearer version of the one from the game. I don’t like it more, though. It has a part where it slows down completely which is sexy, on it’s own. My heart tells me to give this a 9/10 though for reasons I don’t know. Perhaps because I haven’t used that ranking yet. In a hard to explain way I don’t like this version as much as the one in the game. So, 9/10.

Song of the Ancients DoD3 remix - https://youtu.be/SAJi9Q-RRmQ

This one starts out kinda slow, but when it picks up I think it sounds way more like Atonement than Fate. And when it sounds like Atonement I really like it. However I have this DLC for DoD3 and it’s the only song I ever had playing and I’m still not completely sick of it so that has to count for something. It’s not horrible but it’s not great either. It sounds like it belongs in DoD3 and none of the music in that game is great. 6/10

Song of the Ancients the… Music Video? - https://youtu.be/_iXT9eWgaMw

This one isn’t bad, but it’s really, really weird that it exists. I’ve never been able to really remember what this one sounds like so it can’t rank very high for me. It gets bonus points simply because it exists… at all. I think wikipedia told me this was like, official, or supported, I don’t know. Maybe it doesn’t count, maybe it does, but I wanted to mention it anyway even though it isn’t on one of the CDs. She does a good job at performing and it’s a unique remix that takes the aesthetic qualities of Fate and dials them back into something smooth and emotional. I definitely don’t hate it, but it’s not on my phone. 7/10

Song of the Ancients: Orchestral Arrangement - https://youtu.be/Ixk5zFXldCk

This was instantly and immediately my favorite rendition of the song and not much has changed since it first released. While it is without a doubt the most different of all the renditions, it has an almost magical quality to it. Tonally, it seems to follow the story of Devola and Popola as we know them in Nier Gestalt.  Maybe I’m just projecting random shit onto this song, who knows, I’m not a music major. People have said it has kind of a Disney movie feel at the beginning, which is true, but as it goes on it loses that sort of innocent, lofty feeling, and becomes more intense, and I don’t know. I just really fucking love the way this song goes. Compare how it starts to how it ends and it’s just. Ugh. This one is so good. What the fuck. If you listen to nothing else on this list, please listen to this one. 11/10.

[likesomekindofcheese]

Oh My God, They Were Roomates! (Roger Taylor x fem! Reader Angst and Fluff!)

A/N: @cool--cats​, ta-da! I am your secret Santa! And here is your gift for @dtfrogertaylor​‘s Somebody to Love Valentines Event! Enjoy!

Taglist: @cool--cats​ @dtfrogertaylor​ and @queenlover05​

Summary: After a decade apart you reunite with your old roommate, Roger Taylor, now a famous drummer, with something pressing your mind.

Word Count: Around 1,700

Content Warnings: domestic abuse, swearing, drinking, and a big lack of editing.

You saw him drumming to a crowd of millions screaming. The way his hands could trip around and flexibly turn to hit every tip of a drum at a moment's notice made them crazy. His face was a little dark, his eyes shining. Women especially loved it when he leaned to the microphone and let out a voice that though meant to harmonize had a seductive, raspy quality.           

You heard more often that voice complaining about how the electricity went off so he couldn’t make soup. Then his other roommate said it was because of the electricity bill. So then you both let them settle for toast.

That same roommate, he was of average height. You remembered his dark, shiny bob that flounced when he walked. His clothes were often decked in deep, jewel tones and in velvet-like fabrics. Now his hair was short. His clean face was a curt mustache. His luxurious feathers and faux furs, hiding a skinny, hungry body was now replaced by tight shorts, wife beater shirts displaying muscular arms.           

He was singing a slow, heartfelt song. The more you listened to it, the more you wanted to cry. You even felt a few tears escape your eyes every time you looked toward the drum section.           

Too much love will kill you Just as sure as none at all It'll drain the power that's in you Make you plead and scream and crawl And the pain will make you crazy You're the victim of your crime Too much love will kill you every time

 No…no I can’t, I won’t think of it…

You thought the singer couldn’t be that other roommate you had a while ago. Though his voice could not lie, and especially not his teeth.

“That was our brilliant Rog, on the drums!” Fred announced.

 Roger stuck up his yellow head and bowed a little.

“He’s a bit tired, but doing his best! Saving his energy for later tonight, ladies!” Fred commented with a cheeky wink.

“Roger, get up!” you urged, creaking his door open.

“Nooooooooo” cried a lump covered by red bedsheets.

“You have work!”

“Don’t wanna”

“How old are you?”“

“You’re not my mum, Y/N!”

“Okay, do you want to be thrown out and live in a car?”

“Wouldn’t be too bad!”

“You huffed and went out to the kitchen. It was about to be opening hours for the stall. But yet…the empty beer bottles on the floor had provided at least half of the owners of that stall a hangover preventing them from that basic necessity of getting up.

“Well, Rog, it’s your decision…”

“Wait!”You heard footsteps scramble up and then his yellow head poked out to you.

“Could you get me some water? And medicine first, please?” he asked.

There was something about his shining blue eyes and the way he bit his lip when he asked that made a no impossible.

The guard would normally not let a single person in. But most performers on stage didn’t tap his shoulder asking him to let the person in.        

    Thankfully, Roger had good timing. The guard tipped his hat and undid the ropes as you walked in.       

     Roger yelled out your name and you hugged him at once. He took in a deep breath, feeling that even your smell had not changed. You felt the sweat on his body from performing and tried not to stare that his black shirt was now open and bare.           

 “Oh my god…how are you! I never thought…oh my god” he just kept repeating. He escorted you backstage, swinging an arm over your shoulder.          

  “I thought the pass would never work” you confessed, looking down at the large ticket with Roger’s own hand.         

   “But it’s my hand, I thought he’d let you through.”          

  “I doubt it! Something like this is really easy to fake!” you answer, wagging it in front of his face.           

 Roger grinned halfway, his teeth showing.

 “Doesn’t matter, I’ve missed you so much!”           

 “Me too…” you confessed, your eyes glanced down to the floor in a sudden bout of shyness with Roger’s following.         

   “Wanna meet the others? Fred will absolutely lose it!” Roger suggested.            As you nodded, he grabbed your hand and led you away. That grip hadn’t changed much.

           “Y/N! Get over here, you’re crying! ”Roger insisted, yanking your hand closer.

             You waddled forward, wiping away your tears, feeling much younger and weaker than you really were. It was the sort of cry that you could not contain or hide no matter what you did. You felt ashamed, Roger was not a sap in any way.

              He sat you down on the couch and draped one of the blankets over your shoulders. You noticed it was a purple blanket with an eastern pattern on it. That was Fred’s favorite. The one he always claimed when it got colder.

              “Roger, where’s Freddie?” you asked gingerly.

              “He’s on a date, he’ll be gone for a while. What’s wrong, love?” Roger asked.

              You fought back the urge to blush at the use of “love.” But you pushed it away. That term only meant something if you were a girl Roger brought home. Imagining the sounds of his late-night stands forced you into reality.

              “I…it’s my job. I’m just…so tired, all the time. All I do is work and then when I get home it never ends, I work some more…I’m just tired!” you confessed. You pulled the blanket closer around you. It smelled a bit like Fred’s shampoo.

              “You’re just tired, Y/N. You’re a harder worker then I or Fred combined. You need to rest.”

              He listened to your rants and got up to get water. Not an offer to smoke anything. No vodka. Just water.

              But it was the best tasting water you had ever had. And he listened to everything.

The car stopped and you both hopped off at the diner. It was not a fancy place. Dirt-cheap. The sign had bright neon letters that sometimes flickered a little like the night stars. Who would have known that the drummer of one of the most renowned bands of all time would go there?

“I…I haven’t eaten here in years.” You say gingerly. 

You ordered a hot chocolate and french fries for two for the cold night after you sat down.

“I know it’s your favorite,” Roger cooed with a half-grin. “And I’m always deep in the back, anyway. You can only see a bit of my head if you squint.”

 “You always seem to know me well” you praise him. You pick up a spoon to start eating the whipped cream on your hot chocolate but notice it’s dirty. Grimacing, you set it down.

           You woke up late that morning. Last night, you had been up, crying. You were getting older and about to spend a birthday alone. Your family couldn’t do anything, your friends were busy and you didn’t want to busy them. You delayed getting out of bed for a long time.

          But as you walked into the kitchen, there was a blue vase filled with the most bright, beautiful sunflowers you had ever seen. Your breath was hitched. Moving aside the gifts you found a note.

         “Happy birthday love! We had to run to get to the stall on time! But enjoy the gifts! It will be a long day, but your boys will be back to hug you soon! Let’s go out tonight, we promise!

         Your loves,

         Roger and Freddie.”

        That was the last time you really ate at a restaurant with Roger was that birthday dinner with Fred. They both brought up what pennies they could just to take you to a nice-ish place where the napkins were clean and the food didn’t look a week old. Eating just enough for your high waisted pants to feel only slightly tighter. 

         Then they both practically pulled you out to a club. Music and cheering drowned in your ears. The alcohol burned your throat as you inhaled your second shot and raced Fred to the dance floor. A disco dipped above you, glimmering all over your hands in a way that made you seem spotted. Little flecks traveled from across the floor to even the ends of your silk top. 

         You and Fred almost swung dance, nearly cheek-to-cheek like in one of those old movies Freddie was addicted to. Roger only made a fake gagging noise at the suggestion of it. But he insisted on a dance with you too. Despite the pain starting to ache from your heeled shoes, you nodded yes. 

         It wasn’t a slow song, in fact, it was very fast. But at one point Roger put his waist around yours for a minute and you didn’t object. The next morning, you didn’t even bring it up.

Roger folded his hands and looked at you, beneath his brows were those two blue eyes that still made you a little weak inside to this day. You sat next to a window darkened with the freezing winter night.

Why were you so weak? Maybe you wouldn’t be in this position if you were stronger if you could just go right now to a payphone, dial the number and tell him…

 No, not yet.

“You always knew all my favorites. Like remember my birthday?” you asked.

He bit his lower lip. “Yeah, I do. Doesn't feel like a decade, does it?” he said.

The hour was filled with the band and Roger. His now ex-wife, his children, the music videos with the most ridiculous costumes.

“But what about you? I must know, Y/N! I’ve missed you so much, I…”

“Roger, I got a proposal. And I have to answer him by morning.” You blurt out.

There is a bit of silence.

“Really? Was it the fellow you left us to live with?” he asked, he went from leaning in his chair to getting closer to your face.

“No, it’s someone else” you answer. You wrap your hands around your mug for a last bit of warmth. Chewing your lips nervously, you wait for Roger to respond.

Roger looks out the window and then his eyes dart around, looking for an answer.

           “But Y/N, are you sure about this!” Roger asked, just at the step of going into your room.

            “Yes! The rent will be cheaper! You guys needn’t worry about me, I’m not dropping off the face of the planet, I’ll be a phone call away!” you swear, laughing as you toss in a few socks into your luggage.

            “But who else is Fred gonna dress up and swing around bars!?” he whined, taking a few steps with a shyness odd for him.

            “You of course. Everyone thinks you’re a girl anyhow!” you tease as you look up for him.

            Roger huffs, drawing a hand to his chin to examine for masculine scruffiness.

“Well, do you wanna marry him? Is he the love of your life?” he questions.

 You look down into your empty mug. Words are forming at the tip of your tongue and they gurgle out.

 “I…I don’t…I don’t know.” You stutter. “I know it’s what he wants. He tells me it’ll make him the happiest man in the world if I say yes...”

 “And you have to answer by morning?” Roger then adds on. You notice his hand has slid across the table and has balled into a fist.

  “He’s an impatient guy and…I…I didn’t want to hurt him. I…” tears start to well up before you can stop them. You feel idiotic to let it spill in front of a person you know isn’t emotional, but it seems like your id has taken the wheel, driving it further into chaos.

 “I didn’t want to be the bitch that broke the man’s heart!” you confide.

 You pitifully reach for papery napkins as half-useful tissues as Roger pats your hand and shushes you. A concerned waitress wonders if you are alright and Roger only orders for a glass of water. You feel her maternal hand rest on you for a bit until your water arrives.

It’s ice cold. Shivering, you gulp it down and put on your jacket. But the water has chilled your whole body and walking out into the February air was not an improvement. So Roger’s arm looping around you felt welcome.

You savored his touch. His musky smell, even if it was mixed with sweat. This was probably the last hour you would ever have with him. 

“I got something that'll make you feel better! Have you noticed the backseat of the car?” he chirruped, wagging his eyebrows.

 “No” you whisper.

 “Good”

 Roger opens his jacket to reveal three sunflowers.

 “I know they’re your favorite,” he says.

 Your smile keeps growing. But your words pop out before you catch them.

 “The thing is..it’s him I don’t love, it’s you! It’s always been you!” you finally burst out.

Rogers grasp lets go and he dropped the flowers, swearing and scrambling to get them up.

“Then…well…uh…” his face kept switching between pale and pink. “Just…how long?”

“I have loved you since I agreed to move in with you. I have loved you from the moment I kept waking you up to work because I was scared for you, from when you gave me those birthday gifts when you hugged me. And yes, I moved out, but all I could think of was you. All those embraces, I still feel them, but you were in a band! Getting famous! And most of all, women were all over you! Why would you even choose me?” you blurt, tears welling up from years of silence.

You pause a bit. 

Before Roger could even say another word you shush him and finish.

“It’s just...I know you don’t love me...and saying goodbye to you is always the hardest thing in the world to me.” you mourn, finally letting the tears win. 

He shushed you and then guided you to the car and drove you home. But as soon as you were home, a phone rang. Roger walked over to answer it and heard a deep, masculine voice croak.

“Have you made your mind up, cunt?”

Roger almost couldn’t answer.  His jaw dropped and his grip on the phone tightened.

He squeaked out “I’m sorry.” 

It sounded almost like his falsetto melismas. And it seemed the guy thought that it was you because his voice was rising to where you heard every word even though it wasn’t on speaker.

“No, you’re not. You’re playing a game with me. And I’m fucking done. So tell me, are you gonna marry me or not? I know damn well what the answer is. So let’s spit it out and start planning, okay? We have a damn wedding to get through. Isn’t your pretty princess wedding what you’ve wanted?” he threatened. 

Roger stood up straighter and switched to his normal voice.

“Hello, this is Y/N’s boyfriend now. She’s dumped you. And the answer is no. Don’t talk to her again or else you’re a dead man walking.” Roger growled before hanging up the phone.

The next morning you woke up normally. It seemed normal in your house. But looking at the blond head turning over to smile at you was an exception.

“Shit! Yesterday was Valentine's Day! I completely forgot! I just gave you some sunflowers, not a real present!” Roger cursed, he brought up his hands to rub the sand from his eyes.

“You’re my present, Rog!” you insist, giving him a peck on the cheek. He smiled and opened his arms to let you snuggle in.

Looking over at the sunflowers next to you, they seem even fresher and brighter than yesterday. Their white vase makes their yellow brighter. The big black centers have even turned towards the sun making it’s daily journey above you to the east. 

“Got anything today?” he asked sleepily, rubbing your back.

“No, but...I’m a bit hungry. Can I cook you some stuff today? I have some bacon and eggs...I can show you how to make an omelet. It’s not hard at all.” you suggest.

The golden light of the morning crept in, though the room still felt cold with winter air from outside.

“I was remembering what you said that saying goodbye was the hardest thing…” he began.

You nodded, letting your headrest to feel his heartbeat go faster.

“Well, now you’ll never have to…” Roger whispered.  “Because loving you is the easiest thing I’ve ever done.”

[lower7896]

Scarface (1983)

Notable Music: The “dope” soundtrack and original score by Giorgio Moroder

An American / Drug Culture / Hip Hop Culture / Pop Culture Icon

I recently bought the newly released 4K UHD Limited Edition of Scarface that comes with the 4K disc, a remastered Blu-Ray disc, the original 1932 version of Scarface, and a little replica “The World is Yours” statue as seen in the movie.

It’s a nice looking set and I got a good deal on it during Amazon Prime Day. I was really glad to see that the video quality had substantially improved since I last saw the movie on DVD many years ago.

** Spoilers Below** (My reviews are meant to be read by those who’ve already seen the movie. I don’t rehash the plot, I just muse, ask questions, and share my perspective on things.)

Scarface has been deeply ingrained in pop culture and hip hop culture since I can remember. One of my friends used to have a Scarface poster in his room and I remember watching MTV Cribs back in the 2000′s and seeing that every rapper on the show had Scarface posters in their homes. There were countless references in 90′s hip hop. I remember listening to Nas on “If I ruled the World” say

Just some thoughts for the mind. I take a glimpse into time, watch the blimp read “The World is Mine.”

I’ve only seen the movie a handful of times throughout my life, which is nothing compared to the hundreds of times that I’m sure the many enthusiasts of my generation have. I’ve never actually been a hardcore fan of it and have always just observed how so many people truly love this movie inside and out, revere the character of Tony Montana, and have idolized him. Tony has been such an inspiration for people and symbol of a person who made himself into something out of nothing. This is essentially the definitive “rags to riches” story of Generation X and early Millennials.

Say goodnight to the bad guy - T. Montana

I don’t know how to feel about Tony. I feel like my biggest question throughout this movie is “Is he a good guy or a bad guy?” He’ll tell you that he’s the bad guy, as he did in the restaurant scene (although this was said in irony, pointing out the hypocrisy of the other diners judging him when most of them probably used cocaine themselves.)  His staunch supporters will fiercely defend him and point out the fact that he refused to kill the ambassador because his wife and children were in the car with him, therefore pointing to the fact that Tony had a moral code, and was unwilling to cross that line, even though it meant betraying Sosa and leading to his demise. 

I got my balls, and I got my word, and I don’t break ‘em for anybody - T. Montana

People also love his ferocious nature and ambition to succeed, making the argument that he is loyal to those who are the same to him. I would like to point out that although he may have been loyal, he never trusted anybody and for someone who has nothing, that’s bad enough, but for someone who has everything, that manifests itself into extreme paranoia and becoming psychologically reclusive while shutting out all others, no matter how close they might be. 

Mix in the heavy cocaine abuse, violating Rule #2 “Never get high on your own supply.” (Another line referenced in hip hop, the Notorious B.I.G.’s The Ten Crack Commandments) and suddenly Tony just self-destructs. He cruelly mocks his wife, Elvira, in public, chastising her and hypocritically calling her a “junkie” and talking about how “her womb is so polluted” that she is unable to bear him any children, resulting in her leaving him. 

Then there is Manolo. Everybody loves Manolo. Steven Bauer (who is actually Cuban, unlike the rest of this mainly whitewashed cast) did such a good job playing Manolo that he was able to share every scene with Al Pacino and not let him take all the attention. (Who else other than DeNiro have we seen that has successfully pulled that off? I can’t think of anyone.) Despite Manolo being such a good dude and a loyal friend to Tony, Tony still didn’t trust him when it came to Manolo’s romantic interests in Gina. Granted, Manolo was definitely a ladies’ man, so Tony had good cause for concern, but towards the end of the movie when it becomes known to Tony that Manolo had slept with Gina before Manolo had a chance to tel him that they had secretly gotten married, his shock turns into pure blind rage and he kills his best friend, ironically crossing a different line than the earlier one involving the wife and kids. 

I think people wrestle with this tragedy, but I feel that they look past it for the sake of seeing Tony in a positive light. Gina’s hatred for Tony consumes her and she eventually loses her life, and their mother’s words become reality. 

Why do you have to hurt everything you touch? Why do you have to destroy everything that comes your way? ¡Malagradecido! ¡Mal hijo! - Mama Montana

She is absolutely right. Tony’s ambition and disregard for whoever got hurt exacted a heavy toll on those closest to him. They were the ones who paid the price for his actions, his greed, and his recklessness. And I feel that this is the central message of the film. Sadly, no one acknowledges this. Everyone pretty much turns a blind eye and continues to romanticize Tony Montana, and I feel that says a lot about the fans. 

Perhaps we live in a culture of entitlement, of people who would rather try to get rich quick and profit on the misfortune of others than to grind out the years of hard, honest work, or at least applaud those who can (**cough**Trump**cough). Tony Montana couldn’t last a day washing dishes at the sandwich shop. For Tony, that kind of work is for suckers. The life of a “working stiff” is looked down upon in every gangster movie. They would rather bulldoze their way past others in their efforts to secure power and riches. 

For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world, and loses his own soul? - Mark 8:36 (NKJV)

In the end, people will see what they want to see. Maybe they see the allure of infinite possibilities. Maybe they see themselves in Tony Montana, and they think to themselves “If I became rich, I would do noble things, give money to the poor, etc” without anticipating how complicated life can become to those who achieve those feats. We don’t anticipate the new problems that would come our way, along with all the new people looking to capitalize on your achievements. 

Maybe, in his infinite wisdom, God keeps some of us poor to keep us humble. It’s not that money and power changed Tony, its that his character deficiencies didn’t allow him to make good choices when it came to relating to others. Sure he made good business decisions. He was smart in that way, but he lost those who loved him. He was not smart in that way. The money and power just enhanced those shortcomings.

Say hello to my little friend! - T. Montana

Conclusion

I didn’t expect his movie review to be a criticism of Tony’s character when I started writing it. It just naturally became that way. And I think that I wrote it this way in order to balance out all of the gushing praise and love for the character without any reflection on the negatives. But to answer my earlier question of whether Tony was a good or bad guy, I will conclude by saying that it isn’t my place to judge, even if he is a fictional character. I will say that he was fantastically written by Oliver Stone and brilliantly performed by Al Pacino. I’ve enjoyed musing on the depth of his character and will continue to enjoy repeated viewings of Scarface in the future.

[ahagia-sophia]

Story Time

Vlog? Episode 1: A Man of Constant Sorrow

 Hey guys, I’m Jacob. I’ve always wanted to do a sort of blog type thing. But, I could never figure out what I wanted to make it about, you know? I like history, mostly. But then again so does literally every white guy on the planet. [rambling] Not to say that my love of history is basic, or that anyone’s passions and interests are basic its just- Never mind, that’s not what we’re here for.

I had considered doing a history sort of thing, but I decided against it for various reasons. Sadly, I didn’t have any other passions that might be interesting to other people. At least, that’s what I thought. Until the other day when my friend was going on about how I was a central point in a lot of the stories he was telling his new girlfriend. Specifically, I was what he described as, ‘the unluckiest man on earth.’

And you know what? People love real stories. Stories of people having terrible no-good very bad times adventures. And buddy, I’ve gone on a few adventures. So, I figured I’d tell a story or two. Mostly because I really love telling stories, but also because I crave attention love entertaining people.

I have a few eye-catching stories, like; Getting Cornered In a Carpet Shop, Getting Robbed by a Rapist(?), Civil War Reenacting, The Rape Accusation, Accidentally Becoming A Harem Anime Protagonist, Being a Terrible Person, and others. But I thought I’d start with something relatively tame.

Jacob Utterly Fails and Gets Congratulated Publicly For It.

Okay so this one takes place in a small-town high school in 2015. Which should already set off some alarm bells for people who were in small-town high schools in 2015. It was senior year and I was the Battalion S-5 for our school’s Army JROTC branch. The S-5 was basically the media officer, and the place where you threw useless seniors who had stuck with the program for four years and hadn’t done anything that could get them thrown out. Which was me. I was seniors.

I was the pale skinny white kid in high school who had charisma, but was too angsty to use it, you know? I didn’t have any real self-confidence; I would flinch if someone threw a ball toward me while playing Sport. I listened to metal and Irish folk music. I spent all my time playing video games with my friends and actively pretending that the future didn’t exist.

                                   Here I am, in all my glory

Not much has changed.

Anyway, these qualities did not lend themselves to what was essentially a military recruitment program. What I did have going for me was an intense need to please authority figures and a slightly above average mind.

To fully demonstrate my inadequacy, allow me to take you back in time to the distant year of 2011 and lay out how I could not master walking.

This is not a joke.

One of the key components of JROTC is walking in straight lines in various directions and formations. This practice was called Drill. Drill cover such intense concepts as, ‘turn while standing still’ and, ‘turn while moving.’ These advanced maneuvers were, however, based on one simple principle. Walking. Specifically, the advanced form of walking referred to by professionals as, ‘walking without stepping on other people’s feet.’ Or, more concisely, ‘walking in step.’

I was utterly unable to do this. Just completely, totally, categorically unable to do this. Even with such helpful aids as a person walking next to me actively telling me which foot should be hitting the ground. I just could not do it. I would walk in step for a few paces and then immediately fall out of step and have to perform what is called a ‘change step’ which I interpreted at the time as kicking yourself in the back of the heel in order to skip and land back on the correct step. In hindsight I was probably supposed to just drag the heel of my foot. There’s an allegory in there somewhere.

So, I couldn’t master walking. This has been established. This has been abundantly established. And it had been established at the time too. Everyone knew that my drill scores were terrible. Everyone knew that I was very unable to walk. However, I aced the academic side of things, and managed to get my shit together enough to pass the Walking Final with a solid B+, which in retrospect was absolutely a pity grade from the students who were grading the final. My legacy of mediocrity was secured, and I advanced on to the next year.

I was given the coveted position of Assistant Squad Leader and the enviable rank of Cadet Sergeant. What this meant was that everyone acknowledged my lack of ability on the drill pad and also the fact that this wasn’t the real military and they couldn’t drum me out for gross incompetence. Very quickly, however, everyone came to realize that despite having absolutely no actual responsibilities, I was failing terribly in my task of ‘Be the guy at the front of the line while we walk.’ For all of the above-mentioned reasons.

This began my career as what soldierly-types would call ‘regimental bitch.’ I worked exclusively inside. I wrote memos for the Officers (read: upperclassmen), I did numbers for fundraisers, I made lists of names and T-shirt sizes, and generally fucked about in my new walking free paradise. For an entire school year, I was behind the scenes, only going outside for Inspection on Thursday’s.

This, of course, meant the everyone had forgotten that I no ability with the ordered walking. And what little ability I might have possessed had absolutely gone to rust as I spent the year (or two, my memory is hazy) hiding from the sun. (This was in Louisiana, so hiding from the sun was not as shameful as it could have been.) Logically, therefore, the higher up types decided that on one of the last drill days of the year good old Jacob should take the reins and march the assembled company (Class, about 30 people) in a straight line, a turn, and then another straight line.

Sub Story: How I Caused a 30-Person Pile Up, Literally

Pretty much what the title says, really. I was given command of the company. I said ‘Forward, March!’ and everyone started to walk forward. A result which I was completely unprepared for. They started walking, you know, at the pace the people walking in, like, a bit of a hurry would walk. Which was entirely too fast for me.

They walked far too fast. So fast that by the time they had reached the point where I was supposed to tell them to turn, I had completely lost the plot. And the front rank, in one of those moments of blind obedience that you can never recreate when you need blind obedience, walked directly into a brick wall. And then the rank behind them, and the rank behind them, and the rank behind them.

It was a slow-motion pile of human idiocy with me as its conductor. In that moment I could almost hear the the universe stand proudly from her director’s chair and loudly call, ‘Scene!’

I was never given command again.

Sub Story: A Principal’s Principles

Alright, its 2015 or so at this point. I’ve skulked my way up to Cadet Captain and a position of theoretical importance. It’s Veterans Day. I have to do exactly two things. Read a script and put people’s names on chairs. I’ve got this. There’s no possible way I could fuck this up, right?

Did you know that there are two different spellings for the word Principal? I sure didn’t. I was given a very sudden and unforgettable lesson when First Sergeant (one of the two JROTC instructors) burst into the office with my sins printed on paper and asked me if I had passed 3rd Grade spelling. (Which I had, but only because I cheated.) Picture a 6-foot-tall, well-muscled, angry veteran yelling at a pale white kid who flinched when stuff fell off the table. It is not a lesson that will ever leave my mind.

Thankfully, my spelling error was corrected before anyone important could see it. Crisis averted. Now I just had to deliver a speech about a table set for a soldier or something. I was literate, it didn’t have to be fantastic. There’s no way I could fuck this up, right? Well, two things. I had rehearsed this speech, but I had only rehearsed this speech alone with the script. Not with anyone who knew how the speech was supposed to sound. So, they dim the lights, the spotlight falls on the table in the center of the gym, and I read my speech. I gave a damn good speech. It was rousing, it was passionate, and I’m pretty sure I got genuine applause at the end of it.

However.

I stepped down from the podium, awash in the afterglow of a Genuine Success, when First Sergeant pulled me aside and in a very forced whisper informed me that this was supposed to be a somber speech given in mourning for those who would never come home.

Fuck.

It is a common theme in my life that if I do something really well, I have invariably done it wrong. This is a phenomenon that I first noticed in second grade when I proudly presented my beautiful handwriting (I normally have terrible handwriting) to the teacher only to be informed that I had spelled the word wrong.

Now whenever my handwriting looks particularly good, I double check all my spelling.

               It was around this time that it was unilaterally decided (without my consent) that Jacob would never be put in charge of anything ever again. Which was something that was honestly a long time coming. But still hurt when I was informed.

               It hurt my pride so much that I fought it. I fought it hard. I demanded, in no uncertain terms, that I should be in charge of the Very Big and Important Slideshow at the banquet that we hold at the end of the year.

Jacob Utterly Fails and Gets Congratulated Publicly For It.

This was no normal end of the year banquet. These were not your average cold beans and dry chicken. Oh no. I cannot fail during such a mundane affair. This was the year that Colonel, a much beloved man who had held the program together through sheer competence and wisdom, was retiring. This was his last banquet. This was his send off, the blow out, the thank you for all of his years of service and sage advice.

This meant that graduates of the program were coming in from across the country to send off their beloved father figure. And, on top of that, this banquet hadn’t really deviated from its standard form in the past few years. So absolutely everyone knew how this was going to go.

Food, Slideshow, Speeches, Send-off.

This is how the banquet had gone since like 2004. Perhaps earlier, I don’t really know.

I was, as a result of my own arguing and everyone else’s poor judgement, solely in charge of The Slideshow. You know, 1/4 of the entire evening was entirely at my mercy.

Two weeks before the big event I put together my slideshow. I spend hours on the stupid thing. I comb the picture archives from each of the ‘Companies’ and make sure that absolutely everyone appears in the slideshow at least once. Then I go through all the old photo albums and scan in a bunch of pictures of Young Colonel and stuff. To really just nail it, you know?

If you can see where this is going, kudos, because I somehow missed all the signs.

One week before the event I submit my flash drive to First Sergeant to make sure that everything checks out. He gives me some corrections and sends it back. I make the corrections and save it all on the flash drive.

I save it all on the flash drive and only on the flash drive.

Yeah.

The flash drive, as is the way of things, dies. Can’t access the files. Can’t open the power-point, can’t do anything. I spend a solid day trying to unfuck this situation before I admit defeat and tell everyone what’s happened. At this point we’re two or so days out from the banquet and there simply isn’t enough time to make a new one. The slideshow is cut from the evening, and literally every single senior wants to hang me by my guts. Which was fair.

We come to the night of the event, it goes pretty smoothly. I think that maybe I can just slide by and no one will ask questions about the mysteriously absent slideshow.

Boy was I wrong.

In front of all the graduating seniors a few of the returning cadets (probably in their mid/late 20s) publicly praise me for having the clout and balls to cut the slideshow out of the formula. As they had never liked it and thought it was a massive drag on the evening.

I’m pretty sure I’m still living under some of the curses that the other seniors hurled at me over that.

That’s it. That’s the story.

No one chewed me out, no one came to afterward to tell me what a useless idiot I was. No one said anything.

Which was probably the worst part. My general incompetence had become such a common feature in the JROTC program that everyone who actually knew what happened was just. Totally unsurprised.

[geminikpopreview]

VERIVERY’S FROM NOW KPOP REVIEW

MV ---->https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fioEMfxpUO0 

Hello! This is my kpop review for Verivery’s last comeback “From now” including a bonus of their side-track performance of “Light up”. Enjoy! ^^

1.- The group

Verivery debuted january 2019 under jellyfish entertainment (VIXX, GUGUDAN) and is composed of 7 boys (all korean). Their concept so far has been cute/playful/sophisticated and they’ve made a comeback with the album Veri-Able along with their title track “From now” (TTak Jallaseo Malhe - I’ll say it directly)

On this MV the members had these looks (in order of age): 

DongHeon: Leader, Main Rapper / Blonde hair

HoYoung: Lead Rapper / Bowl cut, Brownish-Dark hair, Dimples

MinChan: Main Visual, Lead Singer / Orangey-Light Brown hair

GyeHyeon: Lead Vocal / Blue hair

Yeonho: Main Vocal, Visual / Burgundy-DarkRed hair

YongSeung: Main Dacer, Vocal / Coma hairstyle, Black-DarkBrown hair, Very light skin, round eyes

KangMin: Maknae, Lead Vocal / Two-part hairstyle, Gummy smile, Brown hair

2.- Music Video

The mv was your standard kpop mv tbh, a pastel palette fit for a not necessarily cute concept but a youthful one nonetheless along with individual shots to highlight the members’s visuals and scenography along with a convenient switch and camera movement to highlight some parts of the choreo. Not bad by any means but it contained no narrative other than the boys having fun and being handsome which at least in my perspective is more than enough. The lyrics tell the story of a boy who has been crushing on someone for a long time and tells their s/o their feelings directly hoping to get an answer that will ease their heart. 

The song itself is quite catchy with a mix of pop and subtle r&b. It mostly makes use of the groups’s vocals rather than musicality along with a strong beat that keeps on the background to keep you bopping until the end of the song. Not the strongest rap but a decent one nonetheless, a final breakdown that is just a explosion of adlibs to showcase the vocals and the chorus of the group’s voices on the back. A good release with a high quality production, but not one that will make an incredible chart outbreak under today’s standards of kpop for rookies.  

3.- Choreography / Performance

Jellyfish as an agency is one know for giving very sustained quality, this choreo is not the catchiest but cool and a bit more laidback than the group’s debut. It makes use of a small breakdown at the beggining to showcase their dancing skills and later takes advantage of the number to make good formations and chain movements. At one point of the song they send one member (HoYoung) Flying which is quite fun and makes for an impact along with the music. It is noted though that they use a bit more of freestyle and just standing at times to make for a stable vocal performance and visuals highlight that can get a tiny bit akward but not long enough to get to a cringey stage. 

MR removed videos so far show an improvement on their vocal abilities, however the song itself seems to be a bit too high for GyeHyeon who has a softer voice, only on some performances tho, which may be aswell from exhaustion. 

4.- Additional thoughts

Personally i liked the song, the choreo seems easier than previous comebacks and the fun vibes and catchy beat makes it worth a 2nd listen. However I’m concerned with the group’s future, as much as i see their potential i can’t deny that jellyfish has trouble creating a hit as marketing strategy independently of the highquality music they produce and with how strong is rookie competition these days i fear they will go underrated and not get to showcase their complete talent so please check them out if you can!

5.- Side track performance - Light up

link -> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HvWxX9ANUqY

This one took me by surprise, a much more mature(?) concept seemed to surface with this sidetrack. The choreo is sharper, a catchy breakdown with a classic love theme adlib and them bodyrolls!!! deffinetly got to show of a new side of the members along with a bit more vocal range for gyehyeon which made me glad. Worth seeing!

(A/N: I have listened to the album but this post is already long as it is, would you like to see an album review in the future? if so let me know ^^! Always open for suggestions)

[topweeklyupdate]

TØP Weekly Update #57: Thanks, Jay Z (8/9/2018)

Turns out last week was a pretty good one to take off. Very little of major note happened in the Twenty One Pilots sphere while I vacationed in the Canadian wilderness. This week, however... that’s a whole other story. 

New music. New music video. New track list. New merch. Let’s get into it. 

This Week’s TØPics:

“Levitate” and Trench Track List Leak, and Then...

“Levitate” Video and Trench Track List Released

“Jumpsuit” Drops Off the Hot 100 (But Still Gains At Radio...)

Mark Goes Off

AND MORE

Major News and Announcements:

On Tuesday, the streaming service Tidal briefly posted the third promotional track for Trench before realizing their mistake and taking it down. This still provided the Clique with plenty of time to record and post it in so many places across the Interwebs that Warner Music Group’s copyright bots couldn’t hope to catch up. The likelihood that Tyler and Josh leaked it themselves is honestly pretty low extremely high.

The track, entitled “Levitate”, is the most unmistakable hip-hop track in the band’s discography thus far. Running at a tight 2:20, Tyler delivers some truly impressive bars in what is essentially a single extended verse, constantly mixing up his flow against a slick trap drum beat and the eerie synth that was hinted at in the end of “Jumpsuit” (if the entire album flows from song to song like this... automatic 10/10). 

Lyrically, “Levitate” sees Tyler discussing the role of songwriting in his life, a form of expression that allows him to “fire-breathe” and “levitate” beyond his problems. The song is littered with gems (“we are not just graffiti on a passing train”) and jabs against the music industry for trying to rein him in or make him into something he’s not (“this culture is a poacher of overexposure, don’t feed me to the vultures”, “you’re the worst; your structure compensates, but compensation feels a lot like rising up to dominate”). The reference to Tyler getting back “what I once bought back in that slot, I won’t need to replace” is perfect, and I’m still emotional about it.

I do have a few minor quibbles with the song. I think the looped instrumental is a little too minimalistic to justify the length of the outro. “At least they all know what they hear comes from a place” and “you can levitate with just a little help” lack specificity and fall a little flat for me. And I’ve expressed before that I’m not overly interested in songs about the music industry that aren’t directly applicable to most people’s experience (sorry, "Fairly Local” and “Lane Boy”). 

All that said, the production and presentation is so slick. Plus, Tyler grounds the song in enough personal experience and relatable struggles that it succeeds in crossing over that gap of fame and success to actually hit home. Lines like “danger in the fabric of this thing I made,” “I thought I could depend on my weekends on the freezing ground,” and “don’t feed me to the vultures, I am a vulture who feeds on pain” show the same vulnerability and self-aware introspection that attracted me to the band in the first place.

“Levitate” wasn’t all we got from the leak. An updated version without the yellow duct tape over the track list was included as the background, revealing the names of the other eleven songs that we’ll hear sometime between now and October 5th. The track list is as follows:

Didn’t think that I’d struggle with a song title more than “Bandito”, but “Pet Cheetah” and “The Hype” are really gonna have to go the extra mile in ways that no other song from the band has before to justify those artistic choices. (That said, “Neon Gravestones” sounds rad as hell.) We’ll save picking apart the meaning for all of these titles for a later date; we’ve still got another two months before the album is out, and I don’t think we’ll be getting any new songs or videos until late September at the earliest, so we’ve got time.

ln the wake of the leak (much like with “Heathens” two years ago), the song and video for “Levitate” were pushed out the following day, two days earlier than originally planned if the date on Tidal is anything to go buy. The third installment in this Trench trilogy features Tyler and Josh performing the track at the Bandito camp while vultures fly around looking cool. At the video’s conclusion, Tyler is snatched away from a campfire by a bishop and dragged without a struggle back to Dema. One Bandito looks frightened by this, but another just ominously states “Welcome to Trench”.

I must confess that this music video didn’t fully do it for me. While the production value remains stellar, the “Car Radio” call-back with shaving Tyler’s head is great, and I love any opportunity to see the boys perform together, “Levitate” as a song is frankly too short and moves at a too breakneck pace to make a truly compelling video out of the song alone. I’m honestly shocked that there wasn’t a longer extended scene attached to the end of the video to provide a stronger narrative conclusion to the pieces laid in the last two videos, especially considering that “Jumpsuit” opened with such a scene. As it is, the video moves by so quickly and shares so many aesthetic qualities with its two predecessors that it didn’t leave much of an impression on me.

There is, however, one (potentially unintentional) aspect of the “Levitate” video that really resonated with me. Tyler enjoying himself while performing and being with people only to be yanked out of the group once the energy dies down a little is a perfect representation of anxiety and depression, which so often sets in without warning in circumstances where one would think are supposed to feel happy and safe. The fact that this story ends on such a down note reads as an honest reflection on the nature of mental illness, even if it is perhaps narratively unsatisfying. Besides, I highly doubt this will be our last exploration of the Trench universe; we’ll just have to see where else Tyler and Josh take us when the album drops.

With the initial wave of promo singles out of the way, the marketing team has moved ahead with the business of actually selling the album. Trench is now available for pre-order on iTunes. The Twenty One Pilots webstore is now full of various bundle packages for pre-order that include t-shirts, hoodies, a dope bandana, a 10′’ vinyl EP with the three promo tracks, CD and cassette versions of the full album and (if you order before the end of the month) a neat little patch, all at pretty reasonable prices.

Other News and Shenanigans:

There isn’t too awful much to report outside of the mountain of major developments (thank God). Andrew Donoho posted some dope behind the scenes pics starring Clifford the Vulture. Josh is still occasionally tweeting and posting pictures of hanging out with Debby, his brother, and other cool people. Tyler is still quiet as ever, and I’m not sure why that shocks people. It bears repeating that he was rarely on social media pre-hiatus, that this is probably going to be a regular thing, and that stepping back from social media is honestly one of the better decisions one can make for your mental health and overall leisure time.

The only really notable thing that I missed during my vacation was Mark clarifying on Twitter that the Trench music videos have all been in chronological order and that he’s been happy to be giving Andrew Donoho creative control over how the videos have developed. With how cryptic things have been surrounding this album’s release, it’s refreshing to have a voice of reason to tell it like it is. Thanks Mark.

Chart Performance:

While the new song has been at the forefront of everyone’s mind, its predecessors have still been putting in work... but perhaps not as much as might have been expected based on the last album cycle’s success.

In spite of the release of the new music video two weeks back, “Nico and the Niners” slipped off the Hot 100 after its first week and has declined in all metrics. This week, “Jumpsuit” also fell off the Hot 100 and has also been steadily sinking in sales and streaming. There are plenty of reasonable explanations for this: the too-heavy-for-Top-40 rock sound, the constant stream of other TØP content drawing focus away from any one song, the lack of promotional appearances from the band itself on TV and radio.

Many hopeful fans have pointed to the performance of “Stressed Out” as a hopeful sign that “Jumpsuit” may mount a future comeback, but I have my doubts about that comparison. 2015 was a very different time for the band- “Stressed Out”, like “Fairly Local” and “Tear In My Heart”, debuted on the Hot 100 because the Clique was as ravenous then as it is now, but the band still had next-to-no mainstream recognition. Those songs thus debuted low and fell off pretty quickly. It wasn’t until months later that the Clique’s grassroots support and the band’s rising esteem within the industry resulted in “Stressed Out” getting picked up at radio and being shared with new audiences, creating a snowball of promotion that launched Twenty One Pilots into the popular consciousness. When “Heathens” was released, the band’s profile was big enough to ensure it debuted at #14 and remained in the Top 40 for months. Compared to that performance, “Jumpsuit” is flopping commercially, no question.

However, there is still a glimmer of hope for the song’s future. While it is falling off pretty hard in most categories, it is still gaining spins at radio. It took #1 on the Rock Airplay chart for this last week. That means that more casual music listeners are hearing it than ever, which could make for another snowball where these listeners go back and search for the song themselves in the weeks to come. We will have to wait and see how the band and Fueled By Ramen decide to market the song and promote the album as it gets closer to its release date.

One thing is for sure: the band is not in any financial trouble. Even if “Jumpsuit” never returns to the Hot 100, even if “Levitate” is rejected by both lovers and haters of hip-hop and fails to chart, even if Trench somehow fails to match the Week 1 chart-topping sales of Blurryface even after the band picked up millions of new fans over the last three years, two things remain true: Blurryface made them more money than any individual will ever reasonably need, and they’ve already sold tens of thousands of tickets for their next tour. The days of worrying about this band are over for the foreseeable future; for now, we can just enjoy the music.

Power to the local dreamer.

|-/

[chronicallypainful]

Something that helps me: Magnesium supplementation

As always, please remember that everyone's body is different. I'm talking about something that has been helpful for me so that you can look into it if you want. I'm not trying to suggest that this will work for everyone or that everyone can or should try it.

Last semester, around November, I had a really bad flare. My pain levels were really high, especially around my neck and shoulders. Doing anything with my hands made my shoulder pain even more severe. And I was exhausted. Despite plenty of sleep, I only wanted to sleep more.

Basically, all I could do without increasing my pain was watch videos and read. So, yeah, I binge-watched some streaming television, but there is only so much of that I can take without getting really antsy. So I started reading, trying to see if there was anything else I could try to improve my health. And I came across magnesium.

Here's the scoop. What types of conditions might this help? Mainly fibromyalgia and fibromyalgia-like conditions. Many types of chronic pain have a fibromyalgia -like component, so this might be worth investigating for anyone with chronic pain. There is also evidence that magnesium improves sleep quality, so folks with sleep disorders and/or issues with fatigue might want to look into it as well. (I have a fibromyalgia-type pain disorder and a tangled mess of sleep issues.)

What is magnesium?

Magnesium is a naturally-occurring mineral. It is found in many foods, including fruits, vegetables, legumes, and meats. Some of the best natural sources are almonds, cashews, peanuts, soybeans, and spinach (cooked). Magnesium is an essential nutrient, meaning that humans must consume it in the diet to remain healthy.

Magnesium is an electrolyte, meaning that it exists as a charged ion when dissolved in water. Magnesium plays important roles in allowing nerve cells to pass messages and muscle cells to contract and relax. In muscles, magnesium is crucial for allowing muscles to relax after they contract. As an electrolyte, magnesium also plays a role in osmotic regulation (regulating the amount of water in your body). Magnesium is also crucial part of many enzymes, where it facilitates many of the chemical reactions essential for normal metabolism.

Why might people with chronic pain (or other conditions) need to supplement?

To be honest, this question doesn't have a good answer right now. There is some evidence that the amount of magnesium in our food is decreasing due to modern farming practices. There is also some evidence that physiological stress (including pain) can increase the need for magnesium. But both of those statements are based on limited evidence, and neither provides a complete picture.

How can I supplement magnesium?

Listen up, this is important. If you're trying to increase your magnesium intake, you don't want just any old supplement.

Okay, here we go. The most common way to supplement magnesium is with a dietary supplement. Many of these are not well absorbed, however. The type of magnesium compound makes a big difference. Please do your own research here, but I will outline the basics. Magnesium oxide is a very common compound used in supplements, but it is not very bioavailable, meaning that most of it is never absorbed. Magnesium sulfate suffers from similar problems. There are small studies suggesting that magnesium aspertate, magnesium citrate, magnesium lactate, and magnesium chloride are all better options.

I have been taking a brand called Natural Calm. It comes as a powder that you mix into hot water to make a fruity tea-like beverage. The advantage to this form is that you are actually consuming ionic magnesium, which can be easily absorbed in the small intestine. Be aware that the flavored forms of Natural Calm do use Stevia as a sweetener. Unflavored forms are also available from the same company. All I can really say is that it has been helpful for me.

Another option is to go through the skin. Magnesium is naturally absorbed through the skin in moist environments. (Evolutionarily speaking, think the ocean or hot springs.) If you have a bathtub and some time, Epson salts in a hot bath or a way to get a dose of magnesium while relaxing your mind and muscles. Some people advise making a magnesium "oil" by dissolving a high concentration of magnesium in water. Once it cools, they suggest spraying this on your skin. I tried this, and I don't recommend it. First of all, most recipes have you ending up with a supersaturated solution, meaning that it contains more magnesium than water can normally hold it room temperature. That means that, as the solution sits in the spray bottle the magnesium will start to crystallize in the water, and this has a very good chance of clogging your spray bottle. Second, your skin can only absorb the magnesium while it is in solution. This means that you need to keep your skin wet for an extended period of time while the magnesium is absorbed. So you're either constantly spraying your skin with more water, or wrapping yourself up with damp towels, both of which get really cold. Or else maybe you are hanging out in a steamy bathroom, which at least is pleasant, but at that point you should probably just be taking a bath. When the water finally does evaporate from your skin (or your towels), you'll be left with a fine white powder. This is harmless; it's basically just a really fine crystals of Epson salt, but it makes a big mess. As a third option, there are some lotions formulated to contain magnesium. I haven't tried these, so I can't speak to it personally. Just remember that your skin has to stay moist in order to absorb the mineral.

Can I test for magnesium deficiency?

Well, the short answer is not really.

The long answer has two parts. First, true magnesium deficiency is extremely rare. True deficiency happens when your nerves and muscles don't have enough magnesium to function properly, and it has severe consequences, like numbness, tingling, muscle contractions and cramps, seizures, abnormal heart rhythms, and disruption of the balance of other electrolytes (like calcium and potassium). Like I said, this is extremely rare, occurring mostly as a consequence of chronic alcoholism and certain metabolic disorders. Anyone having these type of symptoms needs to see a doctor immediately. Hopefully that's obvious.

What we are really talking about is magnesium inadequacy, which just means that you have enough magnesium to perform essential functions, but not enough for your body to operate optimally. Medical science recognizes that gastrointestinal diseases, type II diabetes, chronic alcoholism, and certain medications can increase the risk of magnesium inadequacy. The involvement of magnesium in chronic pain is less well studied, but the limited evidence we have that stay that people with chronic pain may have magnesium inadequacy, as well.

Most of the magnesium in your body is found inside your cells, primarily muscle and nerve cells. There are blood tests that can check for the level of magnesium in your blood, but less than 1% of the magnesium in your body is actually found in the serum of your blood. So there is good reason to doubt whether the results of such a test are meaningful. This means that, at present, attempting to test for magnesium levels is probably not helpful (unless you are experiencing severe symptoms). Instead, since magnesium supplementation is generally safe (when taken according to package directions), for most people it is probably more helpful to simply try a supplement and see if symptoms improve.

Please do be aware that certain medications can interact with magnesium, and these medications should not be taken at the same time as a magnesium supplement. Some common classes of medications that can interact with magnesium include bisphosphates, antibiotics, diuretics, and proton pump inhibitors. Please look up the specific medications you are taking and ask your pharmacist or doctor if you have any questions about the safety of adding a magnesium supplement.

Okay, that's the basic science. Back to me.

I started supplementing magnesium in late November. I noticed right away that my sleep was better. I woke up feeling actually refreshed for the first time in years. (This doesn't happen every day, but it does happen a few times a week, which is way better than before I started supplementing.)

It took considerably longer, at least a month, for me to notice differences in pain. Slowly, I started to notice that I did have a bit less pain and a bit more tolerance for activity. It's not a cure; I definitely still have a chronic pain disorder, but I don't feel as bad as I did before.

I definitely intend to continue supplementing with Natural Calm. It has made a positive difference in my sleep quality, energy levels, and pain levels. I would encourage my fellow chronic pain warriors to take a look at magnesium if you haven't already. I'm happy to answer what questions I can; drop them in my ask box.

[secretradiobrooklyn]

May Day Edition | 5.1.21

Secret Radio | 5.1.21 | Hear it here.

1. Zia - “Helel Yos”

This song has been in our heads in a big way the last few weeks. Zia was my first exposure to pre-revolutionary Iranian rock  — sometimes called “psych rock,” though I can’t tell if that’s a designation he would make himself. But to be fair, I have no idea what he’s going for. Nonetheless, those little whistles he does get under my skin and into my brain. I wake up in the morning singing “helel yoza, hella hella helel yoza”… This is from the late ‘60s, I believe. The whole album (also called “Helel Yos”) is pretty excellent, and includes the song “Khofrium” from our last broadcast. A recent favorite and highly recommended.

2. Shin Joong Hyun - “Pushing through the Fog” 

Somehow stumbled on this collection of South Korean music, and it has been mesmerizing. Shin Joong Hyun is a great example of something I love discovering over and over again: someone working within a language and a genre, but also expressing a completely unique personal style that extends beyond those general qualities and into startling specifics. This song is from “Beautiful Rivers and Mountains: The Psychedelic Rock Sound of South Korea’s Shin Joong Hyun 1958-74,” which blows my mind, because the tones, and especially the bass and drums, sound so completely of the moment. It’s sold out at Light In The Attic’s store, so we’ll be keeping our eyes out for it in the wild, because these are going to be some crucial liner notes. The brief version on their site describes him as a guitarist, songwriter, producer, arranger, and talent developer. He began by performing for US troops in Korea post active war time, became a bewitching guitarist and songwriter, then started producing other bands in the region, and a string of hits developed. It sounds like his story includes a really harsh period of intrusion and disruption by the government… but as far as I can tell he survived to the current day, and even helped oversee this collection.

3. The Traces - “Je t’aime moi non plus” - “Thai Beat A Go Go Vol 2”

Ummm… I would LOVE to know what words they’re singing. This chummy Thai version of Gainsbourg’s super sensual “Je t’aime, moi non plus” is such a weird listening experience. I think one of the singers is either drunk or hearing the song for a first or second pass. What are they saying?!

4. Annie Philippe - “On m’a toujours dit”

I really love the energy and style of this track and many of the Annie Philippe songs I’ve heard, which makes it aggravating that the first thing one finds online in English about Philippe is a condescending, limp writeup on her by Richie Unterberger that tries its best to ignore how delightful her voice is and how pleasurable the arrangements are — luckily the dude mentions that Paul Mariat worked on her albums, who also arranged Charles Aznavour. I love the florid colors of French pop from the ‘60s with hothouse arrangements and wide-flung voices. The ebullient drums and electric guitar, the confident harmonies and tucked in little organ and horn licks are all pure joy.

5. T.P. Orchestre Poly-Rythmo de Cotonou - “Houton Kan Do Go Me” 

While we were in the Illinois woods we received some very welcome records from Germany’s Analog Africa label which included “The Skeletal Essences of Afro-Funk,” a collection of songs by pretty much our favorite band in the world, T.P. Orchestre. These songs that explore some of the facets of the band that “Echoes Hypnotique” and “The Vodoun Effect” — both gorgeous, keystone records — hadn’t gotten to yet. The language is Fon, the style is Jerk, and the composer (though not the singer, I think) is Bentho Gustave, T.P.’s bassist. pretty sure the singer is Lohento Eskill.

- Hailu Mergia & The Walias - “Musicawi Silt”

The Walias is the band that Hailu Mergia was in when he first came to America. I seem to remember a story that they were disappointed with the trip, went home to Ethiopia and broke up, but Mergia stayed and kept developing his keyboard style, which did a few decades later (!) actually win him wide recognition and acclaim. This is some of his earlier work, not in the director’s seat, and you can hear so much of Mergia’s style woven into the band’s arrangements. I love how it sounds like he’s just playing pure electric current — it barely sounds like an organ to me, more like uncut groove tone.

6. “Newsies” clip

In celebration of May Day, we present this inspiring tale of unions forming in the streets of New York. 

7. Sexe a Pile - “Pas Méchant”

Another recent record score, this one from our other most favorite label, Born Bad Records in France: “Paink: French Punk Anthems 1977-1982.” One thing I love about this song is that the chorus always makes me think of “High Class” by the Buzzards, a song that never got nearly enough love as far as I’m concerned.

8. The Replacements - “Customer”

Dave got me thinking about the Replacements and before I knew it we were deep into “Sorry Ma, Forgot to Take Out the Trash.” So wild and loose and pissed off and sincere the whole time. You can really hear Westerberg yearn to be great but also sneer at himself for taking something seriously. It used to sound so unhinged to me but now it has become an album about being young and scared of yourself 

9. Plearn Promdan - “Ruk Kum Samong”

Well, this was something we didn’t see coming — the Thai music we’ve heard up to now has been more ’50s influenced. It sounds like a four-piece rock band surrounded by a drum circle. This is part of what’s apparently known as Luk Thung underground. There’s been some very good stuff so far, I look forward to finding out more. 

10. T.P. Orchestre - “Azanlokpe”

I got a little obsessed with T.P. Orchestre for a while there, and was trying to listen to every single recording that Discogs offered — which is a LOT, because they were super prolific. This is one of my favorite finds so far. I wish I could say which singer this is; it was noted as Melome Clément but I don’t think that’s him. So many talented people in this band!

11. Francis Bebey - “Super Jingle”

Francis Bebey contains multitudes. I’m pretty sure he records all of these parts himself. I think he’s just a master of rhythm — all of the instruments weave a tapestry that he can then cavort upon. The body of the song is so hypnotizing, the lead so akimbo. 

12. Dalida - “J’ai revé”

One of the highlights of the 2017 St. Louis International Film Fest was the biopic of her life. This is early Dalida. As far as Paige understands, she’s the French Lady Gaga for people who were clubbing in the ’70s and ’80s. The story of her life has some really sad shit, but this take on Bobby Darin’s “Dream Lover” is full of life.

- “Newsies” reprise

Radical sincerity sometimes requires references to musicals.

- Petch Pintong - “Soul Lum Piern”

I love this track and know nothing about it except that it was collected on “Thai Beat A Go Go Vol 4.” Those collections have turned out to be full of riches!

13. Atomic Forest - “Obsession ’77 (Fast)”

OK, these guys seem really interesting. They’re an Indian psych-funk band, which was apparently totally unheard of there, and they only released a single album — and that one only after they broke up. Because that album is full of great stuff, most notably (at least to me) this track, their story is almost too perfectly suited to the obsessions of vinyl collectors worldwide. Now-Again Records re-released the album in 2011, and we ran across it just a couple months ago. I really enjoy the sense of narrative in the song — what’s happening in the foreground keeps evolving and remaining legitimately interesting.

14. Metak - “Da Mi Je Biti Morski Pas”

I’m proud to say that these dedicated rockers are Croatian, and this track from 1980 rocks like a seafoam T-top Stingray. This is from a 7” with “Rock’n’Roller” on the flip.

15. Mai Lan - “Les Huîtres”

Paige found this amazing playlist on Spotify years ago, and this is finally the way she started getting into more contemporary French music. It sounds like she’s from a musical and artistic French-Vietnamese family. “Les Huîtres” is from around 2008. Kind of feels like 

16. VIS Idoli - “Maljciki”

We found a video of this Yugoslavian ska while looking for something else entirely. I did learn that this is political ska, and that they were frowned upon by the government. One account has them being indulged by the government; another has them under threat of punishment. I do love knowing that ska is a political form and not just a genre. I have no idea how they would feel about the Croatian rockers a few tracks back, and I hope none of them did any harm to one another other during the terrible ‘90s. 

17. Para One, Arthur Simonini - “La Jeune Fille en Feu” - “Portrait of a Woman on Fire” score

Did you see “Portrait of a Woman on Fire”? We highly recommend it, for a lot of reasons but definitely for the passage of this song. It sounds great here, but at night, by firelight, with all the nuns and farmwomen on the island? 

18. The Space Lady - “Ghost Riders in the Sky”

- Sleepy Kitty - “Western Antagonist Reflection”

19. Mikyas Chernet - “Ziyoze”

Marc, this is the song I was talking about stepping into the Teddy Afro position. It’s definitely not the same, but you can hear the modern Ethiopian pop feel running through it. It helps that I first heard it while picking up an order from our favorite Ethiopian in STL, which is also where we first heard Teddy Afro. The dancers are on POINT in the video, and they’re rockin a couple of new styles that I hadn’t seen yet.

20. Nazir Ali - “Lad Pyar Aur Beti”

Listen to the giant smiles in their voices! This is from a very recent compilation. That female voice has to be Nahid Aktar, or at least it sounds just like her; I think the protagonist-sounding male voice is Ali’s. There is a brief appearance from that Oscar the Grouch-sounding guy from last episode’s Aktar song. It’s so cool how the song shifts into new mode after new mode as it goes. 

21. Nathalie - “L’Amour Nous Repond”

22. The Fall - “L.A.”

This period of The Fall is surely our favorite — wherever Brix E. went, the songs were great. And now, with vaccines coursing through our systems, we can feel our thoughts casting their way to LA and San Francisco…

23. Akaba Man & The Nigie Rokets - “Ta Gha Hunsimwen” 

Analog Africa’s most recent release is “Edo Funk Explosion Vol. 1,” with tracks from the late ‘70s and ‘80s in Nigeria’s Benin City. Akaba Man is described as “the philosopher king of Edo funk.” The whole album is full of good tracks that only get better with repeated listens. This one has a bed of sounds that could happily go on for hours or days.

24. Gérard Manset - “Entrez dans le rêve”

Paige: “If you ever want to hear Lou Reed sing in French, this is the best we’re gonna get.” 

- Johnny Guitar - “Bangkok by Night”

We heard the “Shadow Music of Thailand” album a while back but haven’t dipped into it for too long. This Santo & Johnny style reverbed-out dream of the ‘50s lives eternally in Thai psych guitar.

25. David Bowie - “When I Live My Dream”

We do not condone the killing of any species of dragon, and I can only trust that neither dragon nor giant was harmed in the making of this fantasy.

[todaysbiggesthits]

The Exam

Best Music Moment of 2020

Bin: Re-discovering 1990s alt-rock and listening to some previously unknown and/or forgotten jams culminating with discovering that Cherub Rock is an all-time track

Chap: Dancing to Frank Sinatra with my kids on NYE

Bronco: Started jamming with John on Rocksmith.  He pointed out that there was a multiplayer mode, so I ordered another cable and, lo and behold, we were both able to play.  He's starting to learn the bass while I continue to tinker with the guitar.  Pretty awesome to jam out to some Alice in Chains or some Mastodon with my 10-year-old son. Only two more years and he should be able to tour with Korn!

Code: - climbed up to the roof for 4th of july and brought the big set outside to jam at an ear splitting volume. Arden and i danced until we got almost too drunk to descend the ladder. that was major fun. - broke quarantine (and my smoking cessation plan) in late april to ride my bike to the lake and listen to townes van zandt while thinking of bobcat the wheelie king. - listening to shadowplay while closing out each opponent in a summerlong match play tournament. - watching the sun rise through the fog on an october morning while crossing the mississippi river with elliott smith's XO

JD: July: Sitting by the window watching a rainstorm with the Barwick album on the day it came out. October: A big spin of The Big Ship. November: Blasting “House of Jealous Lovers” when they called the election and turning it into a 2.5 hour club mix. November: jj having a violently negative reaction to a song by that Muzz band that came on shuffle and saying it sounded like Jason Mraz.

BC: Haphazard attempt at The Music Game over Zoom in April with last partiers standing - JD, Maddy, and I  "Live Drugs" first listen

Larse: Probably  streaming through YouTube Music's Top Indie 2020 on my Chromecast TV and seeing all of the music videos for the songs on a lazy weekday afternoon whilst I wasn't working over the holidays

Best Shows Seent in 2020

Code: pqc - 10th anniversary show (streamed) silver jews - final show (01/31/2009) a handful of live phish performances while facetiming with jonas, bc and geoff not a single in-person show attended

Nasty:"Dinner  and a Movie" series - Phish Youtube with BC, Code, and Dillon via facetime

JD: 1. Peel Dream Magazine at whatever they call Hi-Fi now on the day before lockdown 2. Real Estate busking on the sidewalk in front of closed record store locations in Manhattan 3. Parkay Boys’ 10th anniversary stream on my couch

Laser: Cirque du Soleil Michael Jackson One in Vegas in January…that was the only show even remotely related to music I saw all year

Bronco: Only seent one, and it was Cold War Kids with my wife.  Had a really good time.  It was nice to share some quality music time together, away from the kids for a night... basically the only time of this butthole of a year.

Chap: Ted Lasso

BC: Yeeeahhh right

Confession of 2020

JD: I think I engaged with Aerosmith music videos more than any new albums.

BC: Listening to new music often feels like a chore

Rotty: I played over 75 rounds of golf this year…another ample opportunity to listen to new music and I found myself just listening to Classic Pop/Rock Hits!

Codem: - i didn't even listen to taylor swift's album. - i listened to bob marley - live! for the first time in 20 years while driving my dad's car and i sobbed and sang.

Nasty: I'm a phish fan now?

Bronco: I'm still reading the book I mentioned in last year's Resolution for 2019 Status...such a slow fucking reader and this book is 1000 pages.  Kindle app says I'm 63% of the way through.  Jesus.

Biggest Disappointment of 2020

Nasty: Still Kanye...

NACK: Sufjan Stevens

Code: - no shows with my sweet one - no stones while waiting for the canons - i think i grew out of diet cig - i didn't put my heart into finding cool album art this year. 

Larson: JD's wedding being cancelled (editor’s note: sure hope you mean postponed)

JD: Don’t know if it was my advanced age, the lack of concerts, commuting, and hearing music in bars and restaurants, or the platform economy murdering my attention span and turning them all into yet more ephemeral ‘content,’ but the new albums really didn’t take this year.

Bronco: Kvelertak was okay, they changed lead singers and the new album was fine, but after their last offering that landed quite high on my list, this one was kind of a let down. Also, 2020.

BC: 2020

Most Overrated of 2020

Chap: Fiona

BC: I fully expect Fiona Apple to flood this answer.  But the correct answer is Waxahachee. 

JD: It’s hard to say given the way ‘institutional’ narratives feel mostly guided by risk minimization, but I always keep this seat warm for Run the Jewels.

Bronco: Any and all death metal.  It's all so samey. I have a hard time trying to get in to any of it, so I don't bother...and then it bothers me when it ends up on end of year lists like it's some revelation of sound. It's literally all the same.

Code: podcasts

Bin: The human brain

Laser: my golf game!

Make it Stop 2020 

Nasty: WOP (editor’s note: WAP?)

Larse: Having to talk about Politics

Code: "better off alone" - purity ring

JD: The impossibly grating contempo pop that’s always on the radio at the bodega down the street.

Chap: Covid? Trump? Celeb deaths? SNL? Murder Hornets? Talkin' tv models via email? Not enough exposure to pop culture to really get annoyed by anything.

BC: The raging pandemic. Seriously. 

Biggest TBH Regret of 2020

Laser: giving this the old college try and having just a shit list!

Chap: Only seeing one show in my 2.5 years in NYC

JD: Skipping Nap Eyes opening for Destroyer in February because I’d so obviously be able to catch Nap Eyes headlining a better venue later on.

Codem: i wanted that teenage halloween album to sound better because i loved the album artwork

Bin: Not buying Lilly stock

Bronco: No regrets to be had, couldn't do anything in this godforsaken year.

Detective Murtaugh of 2020

BC: My back giving out upon bending over to change a light bulb

Chap: Trying to give Taylor Swift the ol' college try. 

Larson: This damn pandemic!

Bronco: I'm too old for being stuck in my house all day, every day, listening to the rest of my family non-stop. I need this shit to end. I can't listen to my kids anymore... not all day. It's crushing me.

Code: now that i own a car again, my favorite pastime has become zoning out to a good album on a long drive and seeing if i can reach an arbitrary mpg number for my trip.

JD: I remember browsing the racks at Media Play and getting mad at every magazine that ranked Love and Theft ahead of Is This It? in 2001 and 19 years later I came thisclose to doing it m’self.

Bin: Arizona,  Pennsylvania, and Nevada taking their sweet ass time counting ballots

Resolution for 2020 Status 

Larse: None How It Went: More than likely it was related to being better at this and this year was probably the worst of all time…

Code: i'm making it easier this year.  catch ovlov, washer, EMA and colleen green live this year.  bonus points: see dom's much anticipated return to the stage. How It Went: ain’t caught but a one!

Bronco: Build a vinyl collection. I know I dumped on Brendon for suggesting he press copies of Carpet Affair, but my kid's getting way into music and listening to it on his own (via Alexa in my bedroom which is super fucking annoying), so we're getting him his own record player and I think it's going to be a cool activity to go record store diving for whatever classics we can scrounge up. How It Went: Started the vinyl collection.  Went record store diving with John at the beginning of the year.  He picked up Ride the Lightening.  And I've got an original pressing of Back in Black on its way, didn't make it in time for Christmas.  I decided on purchasing that album, then a day or two later John said, "I think I know what I want my next record to be...Back in Black".  Sad it didn't make it in time, but psyched I was able to predict it.

Chap: Eh I'm cool How It Went: Ironically, reading back it contradicts what it says

Bren: See Phish in 2020 How It Went: Phish tickets purchased and ready

Bin: Send an email about music on the TBH! thread. How It Went:   Ha!  Set the bar low! Finally. Send an email about music? Check.... "can you  believe Trump plays Fortunate Son unironically at campaign events???"

JD: Get to more shows. Take more aimless strolls spinning tunes. How It Went: Turns out I did a lot of sitting around inside this year.

Resolution for 2021

Bronc: Get vaccinated.

BC: Get vaxxed up and return to normalcy 

JD: - Massively reduce my ‘news’ consumption to free up more time to spin tunes and smell the roses. - Get vaxed and get partying.

Code: see a live music concert

Nasty: I'm going to be ambitious. See a show with JD. Coward move to shy away from this in 2020.

Nicky: To start earlier. It takes me longer to get into new stuff. I didn't even like my top 4 until at least late December, but now I feel like they could compete with most years.

Laser: Be better at this! If anything, the pandemic should have allowed me to listen to more music whilst at home working, but it seemed to have the opposite effect…

Most Anticipated of 2021

BC: TWOD

Bronco: Mastodon, and live shows... not sure I even care which ones.

JD: Dry Cleaning, Park Hye Jin, Viagra Boys

Larse: No clue…

Chap: It's way too early!

Bin: Freedom of movement

Code: it seems like there should be a buncha new cool musical ideas to come out of this time indoors. something like this era's disco?  a big celebratory sound that makes us all smile and move.  in other words, the next dom album.

[jumping-with-jae]

I JUMPED WITH JAE: My Experience at the Day6 Live and Meet in NYC

Hello! If you read the title right, yes that did happen, but I’ll get to that later. I would have posted this sooner, like right after I got home from the concert, but being a college student in the middle of midterm season, I was too stressed to even get to this until now. But here I am! So without further ado, here is how my night with Day6 went!

So first of all, I got myself a P2 ticket, which means that I didn’t have to get in the line super early for the hi touch since that starts after the concert ends. I still got there by like 4 hehe. Anyway, as soon as I got to the venue, I was already met with familiar faces from the KARD concert in NYC (that I also went to and that was LIT), so I was able to wait at the door because of them. It hasn’t even been 5 minutes since I got there and I’m somehow already on Subkulture’s Twitter, like holy crap they’re fast. Trying finding out who I am from the posts that night heh. While waiting there, I got myself a free banner for the fan project (which went decently from what I saw) as well as some high quality fan made photos of my bias Wonpil for four dollars, and I thought it was a pretty great deal for four dollars!

To whoever made these photos, you are amazing. She made so many more photos of everyone else as well, and they all looked incredible. 

I met some P1 holders in the line as well, and before I knew it, all P1 holders were going in to do their fansigns. What I didn’t expect was for them to come back outside, since they didn’t do that for KARD. What was great about this though was that I could see everyone through the glass door walking out just moments after their fansigns ended, and I saw everything from happy and ecstatic to sobbing and crying, and even to some just looking flat out DEFEATED. Those kinds of reactions make my day even better hehe. On a side note, to the girl in the green sweater with P1, you almost made me cry with your beautiful reaction TT

Some of the fans came prepared to show how dedicated they were, as someone brought a Bob the Builder plushie to support Sungjin and someone even made a We Want Bald Jae 2K17 banner which was HILARIOUS xD

The people around me decided to do some sing alongs to Day6 songs, and before I knew it, I’m in the venue with $100 already spent on merch. (YIKES) Though $60 were from friends, so no, I am thankfully not too bankrupt hehe. Going further into the venue, My friend, who shall be referred to as ‘A,’ and I decided to take pictures of us sitting on the stage with the tour sign and instruments, and even though we got yelled at for doing so, we still got the pictures. Worth it!

An hour later, the concert starts, and I felt even more excited when Day6 came out than for a lot of other Kpop groups and bands. I grew up listening to alternative and pop rock music Paramore and Fall Out Boy, so I already had the familiarity of listening to a band in a concert. But at the same time, I’ve also grown to the familiarity of the Kpop chants, so that’s two in one for me! They all looked beautiful on stage, and they were all very charming, both while they’re performing and just sitting around. Some of my favorite performances of the night included I Smile, Noah, Congratulations, Dance Dance, and Free하게.

Some highlights of the night for me include Wonpil wearing a suit, the majority of the audience not knowing what Sungjin likes, and Jae getting lit during the encore. As one of my friends described it, Wonpil wearing a suit is like a child wearing his father’s suit, which just made it even more adorable to me. I actually can’t get enough of this man, like I need help. (No pictures, sadly) As for Sungjin, during the game, I feel like using Overwatch as the picture for video games baited us so hard, and when Sungjin said he likes sports more than video games, it was just so hilarious looking at almost everyone sitting down because they thought wrong. Though I felt so bad for Sungjin, like I really wanted to just hug him after that.

Now as for Jae, I first have to thank ‘A.’ She found me a spot closer to the stage to sit at, and it was an isle seat so that I could see Dowoon even clearer than before. If it weren’t for her, I wouldn’t be writing about this, so thank you so much ‘A.’ Free하게 was just playing, and all of a sudden I see Jae get off the stage and run straight forward in my direction and all I’m thinking is “BOI WHERE ARE YOU GOING HOLD ON.” He got so close as  he stood on one of the seats across from me and began hyping up the crowd to start jumping, and before I know it, I’m jumping with Jae, who’s like only a few feet away from me, along with the people around me. No words could express how happy I was during that moment like… damn man. You’re amazing, Jae.

One thing I noticed was that halfway through the concert, I realized that I just never look at Dowoon playing the drums. Like I always forget that he’s a part of the band just because he doesn’t sing, and that made me feel really sad. So to compensate, I took a video of mainly him playing the drums for Congratulations, and it was just really nice seeing him in his element playing the drums. He looks really comfortable back there, and it made me happy seeing him just doing his thing.

Something that I also noticed is how RUDE Young K can be. Like he can get into the music like anyone else, but sometimes he’ll just be getting his groove on a little too much and all attention goes straight to his hips. Don’t you dare do this to us Young K! I don’t have any videos of this, since he kinda does it really sparingly. (And tastefully too hehe)

I honestly am trying to think about other things that have happened during the concert, but they’re all in this happy and beautiful blur, so if I missed anything else that would be a disgrace to forget, 미안해요 ㅠㅠ

So the concert ended, which means that I’m now waiting to do the hi touch. One of my friends wanted me to record her doing her hi touch and she said she’d do the same for me, but the thing that I thought was that if it was anything like the SVT concert in NYC, you would literally cut a random corner and all of a sudden you’d see the members. And that’s exactly what happened! Like stop giving us heart attacks! I was pretty much as shook seeing Young K first after cutting the corner like how I was shook seeing freaking Minghao first in line for SVT’s hi touch. The staff wanted us to go at a pretty fast rate, as seen by the Day6 members just holding their hands out, not looking to grasp your hands for longer than two seconds. The order btw was Young K, Dowoon, Jae, Wonpil, and Sungjin. So besides just saying “Hi [insert Day6 member’s name],” I tried adding personalized statements like “You’re so amazing Young K,” “You’re so cool Dowoon,” and “You were so lit Jae.” I did say all those things and they just smiled and nodded their heads, and then I get to Wonpil and things already feel a little different LOL. Like everyone else including Sungjin is like leaning in towards the table to get to eye level of their fans to say hi and high five them, and then you have freaking Wonpil who’s standing a little further back, and he’s also puckering his lips inwards, squinting his eyes a little, and doing this kind of nod that could translate to something like, “Yes I know, I know I am.” The most adorable man in the world like I actually can’t even. I didn’t personalize anything for Wonpil as a result of that shock, and then I ended up doing finger guns to Sungjin?? Cute, heh. All of that took like seven seconds, like I even said to myself “Wait can I do that again?” But yeah that was that, and like any other hi touch, I wish it lasted a little longer.

I thought I was gonna go home right after that, but then I notice the van that Day6 would be leaving in, so I decide to wait around there until they came out. The wait took nearly an hour, but the experience was more frustrating for me in the end, just because the van decides to move after the long wait, and ten seconds after that, you hear the fans at the other side of the venue scream for Day6 one last time. No, I didn’t see them there. Sad? Yeah. The screams lasted like ten seconds at most, so I assume the members just walked out, maybe gave a wave or two, then rushed into the van. I thought I’d go home in some disappointment, but one last thing actually happens as I walk back to the train station. As I cross the street, I notice a van that was “very similar” to the van the Day6 got in, and me obviously being very curious, I take a peep through the windshield and believe to see Dowoon’s silhouette. I was kinda just looking in disbelief, like “that’s no way that could be Day6′s van, but what if it is?” Because I’m a little too considerate, I end up not saying anything to the van and just look at the van in pure confusion for the next twenty seconds before they went off. Assuming it was actually Day6′s van, I wonder if, one, they actually acknowledged my existence, and two, if they recognized me from the concert. I’m pretty different from a lot of the people that went to the concert for ��one main reason,’ so I think there’s a good chance that assuming it was them, they did. I’ll leave a picture here to ponder over.

But yeah, that’s how my night went. I took the train with some friends, slept, went to class, and went back to the rough school life. It really was one of the best concerts that I went to, like it’s at least in my Top 3. I could argue that there were some downs in the night, like how I didn’t personalize anything to Wonpil or say anything to the van, but I’m not sad about any of it really. I enjoyed my night with great friends with one of my favorite groups. It was a good night~

If you got this far, thanks for reading my ramble! I could probably talk about so many more things, but I can’t think of anything else right now, and I am also super exhausted. So I guess until the next one! Thanks again~

[seo1code-blog]

The Importance of Social Media in Business

It’s 2017 and social media is growing at warp speed. With more and more people joining social media sites and using them regularly/efficiently, the social media industry is bound to become bigger in the coming years. It’s booming like never.

Yes, the social media wave isn’t ending anytime soon. And your business should take advantage of it if you want it to survive.

With such amazing growth, every business today needs to leverage proper social media channels in the best possible way. Not because it’s the “in thing”, and not because it sounds simple, but because their target audience is hanging around the popular social networks. And they’re engaging with their favorite brands and connecting with them on different levels.

By giving your business brand the social media touch, you not only generate more business but also connect with your customers better and serve them on a higher level. It actually makes your online marketing easier.

According an infographic published by Ambassador, 71% of consumers are more likely to recommend a brand to others if they have a positive experience with it on social media.

Here are some more social media statistics that prove beyond doubt that your business needs to leverage sites like Facebook, Twitter and LinkedIn to keep up with the competition.

The number of social media-using adults has gone from 7% in 2005 to 69% just ten years later.

Social media use on mobile devices is seeing a 30% growth every year.

2 million business today use Facebook advertising for promoting their products and services.

Let’s now look into the importance of social media in business by analyzing its advantages.

#1: Leverage Social Advertising

Social media advertising may be the new kid on the block, but it’s growing faster than imagined. Take Facebook Ads for example. Even though the social network launched ads in 2005, it managed to reach 9.16B in ad revenue in the first quarter in 2017. This just goes on to show that social advertising is here to stay — for a long, long time.

As more and more businesses successfully experiment with digital advertising, they’re realizing that taking the social media advertising route makes total sense. Here’s why:

Lower ad costs: When compared to traditional advertising methods such as print media, TV and radio advertising, social ads are not only dependable, but also cheaper. What’s more, you’re allowed to engage on various social media channels for free before scaling with paid ads. You’re free to grow on your own, at your own pace.

Targeted reach: Traditional advertising doesn’t give you the luxury to reach out to your target audience the way social media ads do. It simply doesn’t work that way. When you’re doing offline advertising, you’re taking the blind, shotgun approach where your returns are dismal even if you’re making big investments. Using social media ads you reach out to targeted prospects, increase your conversions and ultimately get a higher return on investment.

Real-time performance analysis: Knowing if your ad is working or not is integral in order to improve it. When you’re doing any type offline advertising, you’re unable to analyze the performance of your ad campaign. Which cripples massively cripples your efforts. Social media ads on the other hand allow you to constantly keep track of how well (or how bad) your ad is performing. You’re able to change your ad on the fly and instantaneously see the results.

Last but not the least, it’s important for businesses of all types to understand that social media ads are only getting bigger and smarter. Social media advertising is where the future is headed. It’s the new wave. The question is, are you a part of it?

#2: Boost Brand Awareness

Social media proves to be a powerful tool when it comes to growing your brand awareness. There are businesses who dismiss it as a way to build a brand, but by doing that, they’re leaving an open ground for competitors. On the other hand, many reputable chief marketing officers agree that social media has a definite impact on brand awareness.

Increasing your brand awareness via social media isn’t rocket science. Here are a few tips on how you can do so.

Find Your Audience: Before you start focusing on a particular social platform, find out whether your target audience is on it. You can do this by searching for relevant conversations about your product or industry. For example, a B2B company may find their audience on LinkedIn rather than Facebook. Don’t just assume or follow other brands.

Use Visuals: Once you know where your target audience is, it’s time to grab their attention by using eye-catching visuals with your content. Images and videos play a big role in helping you grow your brand awareness on social media channels. Because they not only increase engagement but also boost social shares.

Create Conversations: Social media is all about building conversations. If you use these social platforms for one-way communication, you’ll only grab so much attention. Instead, talk and listen. Get involved. Showcase your personality by conversing, tagging and mentioning others.

Measure Your Efforts: Don’t just aim in the dark. Use the tracking tools provided by the platforms (eg: Facebook Page Insights) along with other external tools such as URL shorteners, Google Analytics, etc. to measure your social media activity. Use the insights you gain to understand what’s working so that you can optimize your efforts and build a stronger brand with social media.

Build Authority: If you want a higher engagement rate along with better brand awareness, then work on building your authority by sharing real value. Along with borrowed content, your content you post should also have something original, as it adds to your credibility.

Remember, every single step that you take to increase brand awareness with social media will impact the overall growth of your business in the long run.

#3: Increase Inbound Traffic

Inbound marketing is one of the most effective ways to generate targeted traffic to your website. It’s the kind of traffic that actually converts because it’s super relevant. However, if you leave you ignore the importance of social media in business, you will be limited to your inner circle of customers or the people that are already familiar with your market or brand.

By putting in more effort in social media promotion, you create a whole new channel to draw in laser targeted inbound traffic and get more inbound links.

For example, having an active blog makes it easy for you to connect with your audience with the help of fresh content. But by having them share this content (on the right time) on Twitter or Facebook increases your reach 10X. You’re suddenly reaching out to a bigger audience that may like plus share your content, follow your brand and ultimately become a customer.

Similarly, people that are already actively searching for keywords related to your product or service are a smaller percentage than those who aren’t. Social media helps you connect to this larger, untapped segment of the market.

To help you understand, here’s the amount of referral traffic social media management platform Buffer generates by creating and sharing quality content on some of the biggest social media networks:

By using social media, you diversify your marketing efforts in more than one way. You don’t reach out to just one type of crowd, but connect to a versatile customer base. Which is crucial to for your brand to make a mark in your niche.

For instance, serious professionals may find your website via LinkedIn while the younger crowd or the millennials may find you on Instagram. Each piece of social media content that you create is a new door for new customers to enter. It’s a different opportunity for you to connect.

Ultimately, it boils down to creating enough high quality content that you can post on social media sites, and in the process attract high-converting inbound traffic.

#4: Improve Search Engine Optimization

Every seasoned social media marketer knows that there is some connection between social media and search engine optimization. While Google has clearly stated that it does take “social signals” into consideration when ranking a page, there’s more to it.

Here’s how understanding the importance of social media in business and working on it can help improve your SEO.

Higher Chances to be Found via Web Search According to Matt Cutts, the former spam head of Google, social shares have no impact on your website’s ranking. But, it’s a fact that social media properties do dominate the front of the search engine result pages for brand names. Which means, social media profiles indeed have the power to rank in the top 10 results. Social media profiles are a great way to connect to your prospects and customers. They work as a doorway to your business website because they show your human side. They not only inform the searcher about your business, but also help them become a part of your conversations.By optimizing your social profiles and by keeping them fresh with the right content, you create a stronger presence on the web. You get more exposure. And you have multiple channels to draw people towards your business.

Ability to Reach More People Via Social Media SearchPeople are no longer dependent on Google search when they need to connect to something or someone. Today, search is not limited to the mighty web search engines. It has moved beyond, which is why social media platforms such as Facebook and Twitter are the new search engines.There is massive amounts of content being created and shared on the social web. This content can easily be discovered by users with the help of keyword search, hashtags, etc. When people search for the type of content you’re publishing on your social media page, you may win new fans that want to follow, connect and do business with you.

It’s just not about the content, but also about the content producer, which is you. When people see great content being created and shared, they’re curious about who’s behind it. This may lead them to look you up on LinkedIn and learn more about your business.

Being a business it’s important that you take the necessary steps to stand out from other competing social media profiles and avoid have duplicate accounts.

The social media world is evolving and is so is the SEO arena. And there are high chances that social signals may start having affect on your rankings. So why not be prepared by building your social media presence with valuable content?

#5: Increase Conversion Rates

Social media is great for capturing targeted leads for your business, but it doesn’t stop there. Getting quality leads is only one part of the equation. The other part is converting those into sales.

Can social media help you increase your conversion rates? Does it have the ‘x’ factor when it comes to giving you the ground to achieve more sales?

The answer is a resounding yes, but only, if you do it the right way. Here are some ways you can use social media for better conversion rates.

Use It for Social Proof According to Wikipedia, “Social proof, also known as informational social influence, is a psychological phenomenon where people assume the actions of others reflect correct behavior for a given situation.” In simple terms, people do what others do. They like to believe what the majority likes to believe. The reason why social proof works is because it gives a sense of assurance to your prospects and lets them know about the benefits of your product, without any selling. Social media is brimming with activity that can be used for social proof. If someone commented on your Facebook post praising your company, use it. When someone tweets you about how your product changed their life, use it. When someone posts a happy Instagram picture of them enjoying your service, use it.

Look at how KWFinder smartly embeds tweets from their customers on their site as social proof:

Use it for User-Generated Content Creating quality content for social media is crucial. But what better way to create this content than have your loyal fans do it for you. People that follow you on social media may mention you in a positive note, which you can use to feature them on your social profile. The UGC acts like a social proof that indirectly helps you increase conversions. Also, this doesn’t need to happen by chance. In fact, you can engineer it by asking people to share specific content for a chance to get featured to a wide audience. Given that you have a decent audience size, most social media users would be thrilled to have such an opportunity. You need to get creative in your approach and ask people. When Belkin did the launch for their Lego iPhone cases, they tapped into the power of their social community. They asked customers to personalize their cases in their own unique way and share the pictures on Instagram.

As you can see, a ton of customers were excited enough to share their personalized cases with the right hashtags. This helped Belkin gain targeted exposure and higher conversions at zero cost.

There are many ways that social media can impact conversions and help you increase sales. But for that, you need first to understand the importance of social media in business and take the necessary steps. We at Lyfe Marketing are committed to helping you do just that. Check out our pricing page to see how we can work together to help you get better conversions.

#6: Satisfy Your Customers

Losing a customer is hard, and gaining a new one is harder. But retaining an existing customer is 10 times easier. Which is why customer satisfaction should be your topmost priority.

By using social media to connect with your customers, you have the opportunity monitor what they want, the problems they’re facing and how you could serve them.

In order to truly satisfy your customers and make their life easier, you need to offer them customer service that is more personalized and effective. And social media helps you do just that.

Customers these days know that social media is a lot more approachable and friendly than a call center executive, thousands of miles away, who has a hard time resolving your problem. In other words, customers want superior service without the hassle.

Increasing customer satisfaction with social media includes:

Monitoring conversations to see if your customers are talking about your brand and in what context.

Broadcasting important messages, announcements and offers to customers via a social media platform such as Twitter.

Offering prompt customer service to customers who are facing genuine problems or need some help with the product or service.

Holding regular question & answer sessions with customers to understand their concerns, get real feedback and see how things can be improved.

Connect and build a relationship with power users or customer advocates so that they can help serve other customers.

Regardless of what social media platform you’re using to help your customers, it’s important to speak their language, give them personalized service and respond to them without much delay.

#7: Enhance Brand Loyalty

A lot of businesses are stuck on their follower count, which is nothing but a vanity number. It doesn’t serve a real purpose if the followers aren’t loyal to your brand. There’s a difference between a random follower and loyal one, because the latter adds real value.

If you want to get the most out of your social media marketing efforts, it’s crucial that you focus on increasing brand loyalty. Having a loyal following means better engagement and better conversations.

Ask any loyal social media follower about their trusted brand, and they will speak positive about it without the need to push. Which leads to natural word of mouth marketing.

You can enhance brand loyalty on social media by:

Having a Solid Social Media StrategySocial media platforms are evolving, and each has its own personality. Facebook is not Twitter, and Twitter is definitely not LinkedIn. Which means, you can’t take the same old, outdated marketing and advertising methods and apply them to social media. You need to formulate a social media strategy that clearly aligns your goals with other areas such as content marketing, search engine optimization, etc. This should give you a fair idea of what type of value you can create for your loyal social media followers. It’ll allow you to not only retain them but also help them spread the word.

Sharing Value-Oriented Content There’s a reason why your followers are loyal to you. They’re looking for value, which you will have to deliver at all times by sharing quality content. For example, sharing a detailed case study is much better than a 500 word article. The more useful and relevant the content you post, the better.Plan how and what type of content you would like to share with your following. By spending time on strategizing your content creation, your content will fetch you a higher ROI when you share it. So don’t rush. See what sets your content apart from others. For example, visual content gets more shares than regular social media content. Which means you’re free to use photos, videos, etc. as long as they add some value.

Being Consistent Your brand has a personality, and certain aspects that are unique to it. By identifying these personality traits and by bringing them out, it gets easier to connect to your target audience. Your aim should be to be consistent in your approach and maintain the same voice throughout your interactions. The content that you create/share along with how you converse with others should reflect your brand’s personality.

Responding to Queries You may not be a celebrity for your social media followers, but they do look up to you for answers. So when they approach you with a relevant query, you should get back to them with the right answers. This way they will know that you are the real deal. And that your business actually cares about others. But don’t limit your answering adventures to your loyal followers. Go out there and hunt for questions that have partial answers or no answers. You can search using targeted keywords and look for questions that need a response. By answering these questions, you establish yourself as an expert or an authority.

Show the Human Side

While it’s okay to automate your social media posting with a tool like Buffer, it’s not-so-okay to keep doing it. Personally interacting with other people and humanizing your brand will go a long way. It will keep your followers/fans keeping coming back for more.

[junioradventure]

[FANACCT] 170611 KNK “해달별" Fansign Experience at 제일라아트홀 (Fanboy)

Hi again! 

I’m here with my fanaccount for KNK’s fansign during their “해달별" promotions.

This was a notably important fansign for me because I’m pretty sure this is my last fansign event before I leave Korea on the 22nd...

I’m so sad. ㅠㅠ

Anyway, it was a really awesome event and I’m glad I got to see my favorite group up close and personal again.

I did a video about their fansign before during “U” era too.

Without further ado, let’s get started!

KNK’s fansigns are getting more competitive nowadays, with fans buying more than 10 albums to have a chance to get in. I originally bought 9 albums, but after seeing a fan next to me at the CD store buy 10, I bought 3 more, totaling up to 12 albums overall. And I got in!

On the day of the fansign, I found the building where it was held and headed to the B2 floor. Some fans were waiting to get in, but the staircase and entrance was rather narrow. I showed my Alien Registration Card to verify my identification (though a passport works just as well) and the staff told me to pick a card that was on the table. The assorted cards were all face-down, and this was to determine my seat number. I got number 63. 

I took my seat, but the rows of chairs were all close together and narrow too, not allowing much room. This was a noticeable inconvenience when fans had to squeeze past each other in the rows. I spent a huge amount of time before coming to prepare a fanletter for my bias Seungjun, so I had to write down all the post-its for the members that I would put in my album.

Soon the members appeared and the fansign went underway. They looked so handsome as always, but they look especially good with the suits in this era aghhhh. 

Sorry that my picture’s quality isn’t too good, but this is how the fansign was conducted. The order was: Jihun→Inseong→Seungjun→Youjin→Heejun

MEMBER INTERACTIONS (with pictures and gifs!)

I’ll fast-forward to the interactions I had with each member. I’m sorry that I forgot some things that happened, but in the thick of the moment, it’s hard to process and take in everything that happened (for me). Luckily, I met someone at the fansign that was kind enough to take a video of me when I went through this great experience. I was really nervous again, because they’re my favorite group and this was my last time, so I was even more anxious. 

JIHUN

So leader Jihun was first this time around~ Actually he was rather quiet today as well; when I met him at a fansign last year, he was rather soft-spoken too. But it’s not necessarily a bad thing. I pointed to the questions I had brought for him on the post-its and told him I was a part of an international KNK fan group on Facebook, and I gathered some questions other Tinkerbells wanted to know about KNK. He was listening and then all of a sudden, said, “Ah. International,” in English. THAT WAS FREAKING CUTE AHH. He was really handsome up-close, though. He looked mature and cool when he was in thinking mode, but then he lapsed into squishy mode when he smiled and it was just adorable.

He really thought deeply about the questions I wrote. I guess he had to think a lot about how to answer them. But another factor was that time was really limited and the staff members were quite strict so they moved our albums to the next member by force, cutting our time short. 

Blue post-it note: Q: Which member is really the closest to Jihun-hyung...? A: I’m close with all but umm... Heejun?! Jihun had some trouble answering this question but dang, I didn’t expect him to think so seriously about it. ㅠㅠ I’m sorry if I had to make you pick a favorite! I know you all love each other LOL. 

Yellow post-it note: Q: Where do you draw the inspiration when you make the choreography (for KNK)? A: There’s just times when suddenly... Ttak!  I forgot what other little things we said after he answered those, but I had to move on. I gave him high-fives as a farewell and moved over to... Inseong!

INSEONG

Next was my second bias, Inseong. I greeted him by saying, “Inseonggie hyung~” hahaha because he’s just a fun, cool guy. He grinned and asked, “Hyung?” I SWEAR THIS WAS SO REMINISCENT WHEN I FIRST MET HIM in person when he asked me, “Am I hyung?” LOL. But he is just killing the visual game nowadays. He looked especially handsome today. He asked me where I’m from and I told him America, more specifically Hawaii. 

Bottom post-it note: Q: Is there a place you really want to visit (vacation-wise)? A: Hawaii That’s probably why he cleverly wrote his answer as “Hawaii” for my question, but I’m not complaining! Inseong is really easy to talk to.  I told him that his hairstyle for this concept suits him very well and that he looks really handsome. He was really happy to hear a compliment and ahhh he was just an excited hamster. I assured him that he was already handsome but now, even more. I basically complimented him a lot because he deserves more love and attention!! Top post-it note: Q: The most difficult point of this promotion...? A: Live...!? He explained that singing live was one of the toughest parts of promotions. I asked why, and he said it’s because he has to sing rather high. I understand him because him singing the chorus in “해달별" while dancing pretty vigorously looked really tiring... But he pulled it off! I told him he was really good and that he’s doing well. I feel like he was insecure a little about his performance as a vocalist and how well he does and I wanted to reassure him. It was time to move on so I told him bye~ Inseong really does have a warm heart and he’s such a nice person please give him lots of affection and reassurance

SEUNGJUN *BIAS ALERT*

*sigh* I really can’t express how great and caring Seungjun is. I can tell he truly loves and adores his fans, and it shows from the way he treats them. He said my name like, “Junior?” in a cute tone and I said cutely too, “Seungjunnie-hyung~” AHAHAHAHA. He immediately looked at my questions and more antics ensued.

Blue post-it note: Q: POKEMON or DIGIMON, you can only choose one A: *marks Pokemon* but went the extra mile to show his UNCONDITIONAL PREFERENCE FOR DIGIMON LIKE WHAT THE NOOOOOOO Yellow post-it note: Q: Is there a member you want to live with for the rest of your life? A: Inseong Jihun At first, he took a look at the blue note and I reiterated, “You can only choose one!” Without hesitation, he answered, “Digimon!” I was like WHAT THE HECK, NO YOU CAN’T CHOOSE DIGIMON OVER POKEMON OMGG. He was so firm, he was like, “Digimon~” in a cute tone and I told him, “Why??” He seemed a bit sympathetic and marked Pokemon, but said, “Digimon~” again and decorated a box around the word Digimon. DANG IT SEUNGJUN. I was like OTL because I came dressed in a Squirtle hoodie because I thought he loved Pokemon more but that happened. I mockingly complained, “I came dressed like this too...” Seungjun chuckled and then proceeded to gently grab my arm and draw a little heart on the Squirtle patch design on my hoodie!!!

SJ: *in a Korean accent* Hearteu~ I internally died at this cute action like I AM NEVER WASHING THIS HOODIE AGAIN LOL I also made sure to give him the letter I worked on. He then looked at my second post-it, which he thought about for a moment. At first, Seungjun wrote Inseong, so I asked him why. He said because Inseong is funny. BUT THEN LAST MINUTE Seungjun scratches out Inseong’s name and writes Jihun AND HE DIDN’T EVEN GIVE A REASON WHY LOL. So that made think like HMMMMM this ship really sails itself huh... Now I had to tell him that this was pretty much my last chance to see them... Me: Actually, on the 22nd, I’m leaving Korea, so this is my last chance to see you guys. I’m really glad I got to see you guys often while I was here. SJ: *in a cute pleading voice* Don’t go~ (AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH) Me: I don’t wanna leave either!

And then this happened.

OMG I was so flustered when he asked when I’ll be back with that cheeky smile that I accidentally lapsed into English hahahaha. He probably didn’t understand what I said, but I had to move on ㅠㅠ!! Wait for me Seungjun, I’ll be back!! I really want to cry now... Hahahaha. And it ended cutely because I kept shaking his hand, and then...

Thank goodness. He is the best and he’s always so sweet!!

YOUJIN

Okay I’m going to start off my account of Youjin because right when I got to him, he asked me, “Are you a fan of Seungjun?” BWAHAHAHA he called me out!! I told him that I liked all the members but yeah, Seungjun was my fave... If he noticed that, then wow... 

And then it was like another round of deja vu because I told him I was from Hawaii and that he should come, and he replied, “I want to go too!” LIKE THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT WE SAID LAST YEAR AT THE FIRST FANSIGN LOL.

He looked over my questions and I told him they were from other international fans. He got super excited over the Overwatch question and his inner fanboy came out. 

Yellow post-it note: Q: Which heroes (do you use) when you play Overwatch? A: Roadhog, Reinhardt, and... the last part was a bit illegible but I think he wrote the name of a Korean Overwatch player named 후아유. [If anyone wants to help me out with deciphering that, it’d be much appreciated~] He was so happy when talking about his mains for OW, but I had to tell him that I actually didn’t know the game at all loooool. I wish I could’ve nerded out with him but idk ㅋㅋㅋ He even asked me, “Isn’t Overwatch quite popular in America?” lmaooo which is true but yeah, I’m clueless.

Blue post-it note: Q: What are you most afraid of?? A: Bugs! 1인칭 horror game.

So Youjin seems to be the least fearful in the group so I also wanted to know what scares him. He wrote “bugs” and I couldn’t believe like this guy didn’t flinch for the ghost prank or a VR zombie slashing him but he’s afraid of insects??

I’m not judging tho but dang.AND OKAY I SEARCHED UP THE HORROR GAME HE TALKED ABOUT AND THAT SHIZ IS NO JOKE.

OH HELLLLLL NOOOOO YOU CAN COUNT ME OUT OF THIS GAME CUZ SHIZ I WOULD PISS MYSELF DURING THIS VR EXPERIENCE

But Youjin is a cool chill guy who loves gaming so hit him up yo

HEEJUN

Heejun, Heejun, Heejun. You never know how he’ll be like. I heard from a friend that he’s different every time which is kinda true. The first time I met him, he was comical but on the quiet side, and we were kinda awkward... BUT THIS TIME WAS JUST OMG LOL. He spoke some English to me even though I was talking to him in Korean which was cute. He said things like, “Where are you from?” and “Really?” Soooo silly. I complimented him on his English pronunciation and I DIDN’T NOTICE THIS UNTIL MY FRIEND SHOWED ME THE FOOTAGE SHE TOOK AND-

OMGGGGGGGGGGGGGG. Heejun’s also quite chill but he’s so funny agh.

Yellow post-it note:  Q: Is there a concept you want to try? A: BTS’ Blood, Sweat, Tears  hOLY SHIZ IS IT WEIRD THAT I CAN ALREADY IMAGINE HEEJUN IN THAT KIND OF CONCEPT? he already bares his chest sometimes like omfg and I can totally see him pulling it off like shiz I AM READY Blue post-it note: Q: Heejun-ah~ Please write down your favorite color!! A: Black, gray Heejun forgot because he even asked himself out loud, “Which colors do I like?” I told him, “Why don’t you know??” HAHAHA.  I told him I was l was leaving soon and he just replied, “When will you be back?” LOL. IDK, I wish I knew, then I wouldn’t have to leave y’all ㅠㅠ I told him bye and he was like, “bye bye!!!”  Later on, the members picked random seat numbers from a box and the chosen fans could take a selca with them. SO LUCKYY. I WASN’T CHOSEN BUT UGH IT’S OKKK.  Then they played 공기, which is a Korean bean game similar to Jacks. Jihun got really competitive and he almost kicked the stage LMAOOOO. Seungjun was really bad at it and he ended up last. Youjin was first, followed by Inseong, Heejun and finally Jihun secured a place by a hair. Seungjun’s punishment was dancing to their title track with aegyo LOOOOOL he tried his best but he looked so awkward omg And that was it. My last fansign with them. I love them so much, because they’re all so wholesome and show their personalities unabashedly. All of them are SO DIFFERENT and the dynamics are just so interesting and charming.  SORRY I cut it a little at the end but I have to go to class ㅠㅠ I’ll tweak this a bit later maybe but I hope y’all enjoyed this!!!!

[ethan1220world-blog]

Audience Studies (3P18) Blog Post #1 - Ethan Limsana

During the introduction of our text, we learn many different ways to describe the concept of an audience and how a particular audience has and can function over time. A critical piece in learning about where we are now, is to examine how they began and evolved overtime based on popularity of politics and social needs. In order to relate to these teachings, I will apply them to my modern life with a form of entertainment that I access daily in many different ways and social settings depending on context: music. Whether it be walking through the supermarket with a pair of headphones on, or at a live concert surrounded by crowds of rowdy young adults, music demonstrates a multitude of ways an audience can be affected. I listen to music daily on my phone with the goal of finding melodies that are addicting, and artists that write lyrics that heighten my emotions either by making me feel excited when I’m energized, or depressed when I’m sad. Once I’ve found the right song, I can listen to it many times before I get bored, and look at other works the author has to offer through streaming platforms like Spotify and YouTube to choose what else I do and don’t like. This work that I’m doing to curate my music tastes are demonstrating an information based audience by simply listening to the artist and what they have to say about a given topic. It also demonstrates a meaning based view because by choosing I like and don’t like, the artist will see those tracks and adapt future works based on the reviews. Although, these messages would be much different face-to-face by exact knowledge given to one another, I am a part of the mass audience and communicate through my views, likes, and shares. This is my role in obtaining music for low cost, often free, for the large profit organizations that provide me music. Like any other job, I perform these roles when I am the audience member, and when I stop listening, I am no longer an audience member. Although I enjoy listening to 1980s music, my music taste has changed due to shifts in society and me as a demographic. As streaming services kept offering me to listen to rap music for being a young adult male, I eventually tried it, giving into Drake, Young Thug, Tupac, and more. Here, my shift in music taste was a result of the audience-as-outcome model because the media altered my taste. As mentioned before, I filter into the grand scheme of advertising and ratings as an individual on my phone, without a public space to listen or review the music, where most others are listening too. Since this experience is primarily alone, and I have no connection with other listeners, I am part of the audience-as-mass model. Not to say I have no power in this situation, I demonstrate audience-as-agent too by telling social media, and the entertainment providers what I think and ultimately making the final decisions of my interests on my own; in this case I happened to not enjoy older rap music, but enjoy modern rap music because it heightened my excitement. I chose to keep what I enjoyed because it fits me and my lifestyle, as an act of my free will. 

A small percentage of the time I spend with music is live because it costs more money, often requires travel, and isn’t nice for time management, but it's the most engaging and memorable musical experiences I’ve ever had because of the nature of crowds. As a practice dating back to ancient Greek and Roman audiences, concerts are the same in essence; hundreds or thousands of people leave their homes to gather in one specific location to listen to a select few. Here, it is entirely dependent on the people on stage to determine the energy of the crowd. At rap concerts, loud music is played, and messages of substance abuse, and violence are in the lyrics. The crowd responds to this content by showing up to the concert dressed in fashionable clothes, drinking, getting high, and most of all, being rowdy by pushing, shoving, crying, and sometimes even fighting. As feared by the end of the 19th century, live concerts often display the potentially destructive qualities of crowds. As an individual listening to music alone, the reality is relatively unchanged from regular society, but when a crowd gets together, it is a temporary change in that particular society as a collective because individual actions have less consequences associated with them and immediate emotions can freely be demonstrated by all. The positives of the crowd are also unchanged; they create a physical setting for me to go, and create a memorable experience for me to worship someone who was already in power, to reinstate my value in enjoying their music, and keep them in power. 

This power opens up new opportunities for record labels and artists to scheme new ways to alter our decision making process to make choices that continue their revenue flow and keep them in power for as long as possible. For example, Drake and his label OVO, use advertising and multimedia to keep us thinking about his music and persona even when we’re not listening. The money made from live events and music sales, goes into buying and selling merchandise, buying restaurants, maintaining an entertaining Instagram page, and utilizing television and film for documentary and selling the idea of his rich lifestyle. Although it is our own agency and free will to choose what we enjoy, these power moves are made to trigger appeal and to trick us into a cycle of worship.

It is the complete truth that modern rap music is a gold mine for those in power: it is repetitive, subject matter is relatively the same throughout different artists, and it is insanely popular among young viewers who make up most of the internet’s usage in North America. It can be tough for myself to take a moment to realize all that I see online is not real, but I’m one of millions, with many that don’t have the education to consider that. The effects perspective is a lens I can use to think about how I am affected by these powers in media that influence me now, and over time. In order to be informed, and understand why I’ll be advertised certain types of content in the future, is to study why my demographic reacts so positively to rap music. 

As part of mass society, I and others are listening to this music alone, with little to no exposure of the themes suggested aside from movies and tv shows. Mixed with being a young adult, male and naive, this ignorance to the rapper lifestyle is exactly what advertisers capitalize on to gain and keep my attention. We live in a progressive time where racial equality, specifically black, is at the forefront of all media concerns and therefore, our concerns. The issue is that I have no first hand idea what is different in their culture as opposed to mine. There are few popular media that demonstrates African American’s as regular people who do regular daily things; instead the popular discourse uses selective exposure to say they grew up on the street and have become rich and surpassed whites. When music videos and lyrics suggest their lifestyles include endless amounts of money, having sex with multiple women, and killing people they don’t like, there’s actually very little I can actually do to disprove that even though its highly unlikely. Early concerns with mass persuasion worry that even though I have the critical ability to deem what is true and what isn’t, my brain wants to imagine something before it experiences it. I’m only shown stereotypes, so that's all I have the capacity to imagine for the time being. The artists acts as a barrier between me and their affairs; they only let me imagine how rich their lifestyle is for their specific interest of me believing that listening to what they have to say will elevate my life in some way, or keep me racially diverse. 

I keep listening to these fake notions of black culture because, well, it's addicting for me. The Payne studies showed some important facts: intense violence and action scenes were more memorable for boys, the more exposure of similar themes created pronounced beliefs within children, and the interest in sexual themes became more engaging in children as they grew older. The themes I’m exposed to represent delinquencies that parents and teachers have taught me to stay away from, so they are exciting for me to see and fantasize about. It is an over-saturated market also, so I have more pronounced internal feelings about the content. Also, it is at a point in my life that I am more gullible to what is shown to me online. If these reasons weren’t enough to argue why I don’t stop listening, the presence of opinion leaders and emotional contagion make it increasingly difficult to leave the genre. Opinion leaders rise within my friend group, and reviewers I find online. Being so close to Toronto, most of my friends fall into the same demographic trap and see Toronto rappers as something to take pride in and constantly keep up with celebrities’ internal drama. Online reviewers, although they have more credibility, often promote the popular opinion in order to keep fans happy, sharing, and make their program more popular, and they might even be incentivised by outside sources to create and artificial opinion. Seemingly everywhere wants me to keep listening to this music, and when it consistently keeps my friends and I in an energized mood through emotional contagion, it at least feels like it's doing more good than bad in the moment.

As an audience member, mass media has treated me like an object whose attention can be persuaded, changed, and sold, but it's too early for me to see long term detrimental effects. I spend about 6-8 hours looking at screens everyday with heights of around 12-14 hours. Some of this is because of work, but more than half is for consuming entertainment and social media. It often gives me a fictionalized perspective of different topics which is why I’ve worked hard in the last two years to improve my lifestyle and create more unique experiences. Most of this leisure time is worse spent than when the media originally pulled me into addiction at the beginning of high-school. I was recommended to watch things I’ve already seen, or are so similar, it offers no unique ideas, so constantly being offered what I already like has put me in a rut. Also, I am weary of gaining emotions because of my viewing habits. Since most of my interests in entertainment are associated with delinquent themes, I recognize that when I’m out, I am not outgoing with strangers because I don’t trust them. Commonly in mob related movies, they give the feeling that you can’t trust anyone, and those feelings lie somewhere within me.

Public opinion is the most powerful information a company use to always have the upper-hand over the consumer when it comes to buying and selling. The information can be private or public depending on if it is beneficial to the company. It can be used to gain honest opinions about what the population thinks about a product, or a survey can be made specifically to trick the public into conforming to a certain ideal by use of question-wording-effects. The information can be used to alienate consumers into bandwagoning onto a perceived public opinion. The potential to mix and match these uses seems like a modern day superpower to me. To examine the ways public opinion is measured and used by large corporations for profit, I’ll relate to myself working in sales at Best Buy and Virgin Mobile to compare and contrast by looking at what I do to earn an individuals’ opinion on a much smaller scale. 

When working with a customer, I want to ensure my commission is made whether or not it is in the buyers’ best interests when they walk in. First, I want to find out why they’re in the store. I ask about what issues they have with a current device, and move further to find out important things about their lifestyle: if they have kids, are they in school, where they live, and what hobbies they have. At this stage, I am giving my customer a person-to-person interview where I establish rapport, and my most advantageous position as a salesperson to both learn about the client, and earn a degree of trust so I can be given true answers to my questions. Here, I avoid leading questions because the answers wouldn’t accurately depict the information I want to offer a product that is relevant. The tactics of my survey change depending on what part of the sale we’re at for my benefit. Once we find the right phone for the user, we talk about the price which is where response effects are wildly useful. If the first thing I say is the actual price per month, the customer would be unsatisfied with the number and feel entitled to bargain, or wait for another sale, or go to a different company entirely. Instead, I show the original price for the phone, and their mobile plan separately which is always high, then show them what I can save them by signing up with a new contract; the response is almost always positive. This is because the original price has nothing to contrast except for some kind of number they’ve had before, or seen in a flyer which isn’t obtainable for me. In the second example, I’ve given a realistic, yet unfavourable example for them to contrast instead to get rid of any pre-existing notions of price. Once the customer has decided to buy the service or product, they will be less likely to buy anything else because they either don’t have enough money, or are weary of me taking advantage of them. When defenses are high, question-wording-effects can be used to make the customer think they want more. The last thing I have to sell is extra insurance for your phone, which everyone is accustomed to say no to because of negative connotations of other insurances like car, or life. Once they tell me they don’t want insurance, I proceed with the process and move on to the next topic, but realistically, I’m using this time to include specific words and body language to make them feel unsafe about their new product. I will begin using words in our conversation that have to do with the length of their contract, the price of the phone, specific words like fragile, stuck, lost, regret. My body language also changes to be more loose and clumsy, and often I place my drink uncomfortably close to the new device. When I ask again later in the process, the customer feels they have made the decision for themselves, drop their defense and buy. 

Sometimes, other means of gathering opinion are beneficial as well. Although a personal interview offers me the most advantages, a telephone interview is a cheaper and time efficient way of gathering information. There is a possibility I could employ the same tactics into this interview, but that poses a couple problems. I cannot establish rapport as well, so if I ask too many personal questions, the customer will feel uncomfortable and hang up. I generally need to avoid leading questions, and keep the call strictly about the sale. This is a good way to earn information to use in the future, not the present. I can filter their answers to find out what may be a successful offer for the future. For use of large companies, this type of information could be used to find out where and when to sell things, but not as precise to find out what type of product to make. The final type of survey I look for is an email survey. These help me to gain a higher personal rating to gain recognition within my company, but as the text suggests, these are borderline useless way of gathering and asking for information. Just about all ways of surveying have some kind of flaw which skews the data gathered with varied impact, but email has to be the most negative impact. It requires the customer to actively do it during their leisure time, and it holds no benefit to themselves. Out of every ten customers I offer the online survey to, one may actually do it. This means they would have an outstanding reason to do it; either they really liked, or really hated the service. The numbers of completions are low, and the sources are not credible.

After information is acquired, the Government and large corporations use qualitative and quantitative data to use audiences in ways that far exceed the possibilities of an individual. They use this information to operationalize their audience; keep their viewing habits the same, and constantly sell their time to advertisers without suspicion. In order to find examples of political economy today, I will examine myself as an audience member of advertisements specifically through my phone on social media platforms and entertainment streaming services. Now that I can identify how advertisers obtain my personal habits and information, I can assume who is buying it based on what advertisements, or entertainment I’m offered. 

As a consumer, I actually pay for many of the streaming services I use which I know isn’t the norm for post-millenials. I pay monthly to access Netflix, Spotify, and YouTube, which means I don’t receive advertisements through these entertainment services, which is great for some of my leisure time, but I do not escape advertisements altogether. In fact, each of these streaming services, including the phone I bought, have a mandatory a lengthy multi-page terms of service agreement which states that they are services which I use while I pay for them, and during this time, they can gather as much information about my viewing habits as they want to improve their services. In exchange for signing this contract, I am given thousands of choices of the most popular movies, TV shows, and music of today with a service that knows what I want to watch even before I know what its about. In the meantime, however, all information of my demographic including how much I am paying for streaming is being sold to google, to then sell to advertisers in similar markets. I’m still not rid of the blindspot that advertisers use to steal my leisure time. Often while watching a show, I browse on my phone, and during that time I get ads for tv shows and movies on subscription services I have yet to pay for. The luxury of using Netflix services is paid for by me enduring ads for other similar subscription-based websites, which I am then working for free to review by looking at them and seeing whether or not they are worthwhile, just for it to be advertised again when there's a new incentive for me to consider again. This same operation happens to everyone who uses streaming services, as the audience is a commodity to be bought and sold by advertisers. 

I’m treated very well as a subscriber of these services; the servers send the program are reliable with few buffers, the websites don’t have malware or bugs that slow down the speed of my computer, and I even get special features such as the option for subtitles on any show, and even an automatic option to skip opening credits. The same can’t be said for those who can’t afford to pay monthly, or who are using ad blockers. For example, my girlfriend is the daughter of Asain immigrants and she watches Korean TV, but she doesn’t pay for streaming services, and there are no channels for her to watch them for free. She streams these shows from free servers she finds online. These are often filled with malware, regular ads, and pop-up ads that ruin the viewing experience as well as poor servers from outside of the country which buffer and crash often. I am labelled as a priority customer because my viewing consists of popular American TV and I pay for the service, meaning I will most likely respond well to the advertisements that are sent to me and have a higher chance of purchasing, so my leisure time is improved to keep me as a customer. My girlfriend is exactly what advertisers will ignore, she enjoys foreign shows and doesn’t pay for her streaming service, so her leisure time is not cared for or valued, so is less important. This is a slightly different take on what the text has to explains, but it is a similar issue. Racial formation is causing someone close to me to not enjoy their leisure time as much as me because of their background and taste. 

Adding market value to certain demographics does show signs of massive potential in new technologies though. Our viewership is measured on any platform we visit through server logs, and cookies. Even now with Google assistant and Google Home and smart home devices and surveillance systems, our voices are being monitored too. I had a conversation with my mother about what Halloween costume I am going to wear this year, and Google offered me advertisements for Halloween costumes the next day. This is the evolution of peoplemeters that tracked TV viewing habits, but on a much smarter and efficient scale that people meters couldn't achieve. Because of psychographics, we are not purely treated as a mass audience in this situation. I am not being offered to listen to Drake because Drake is popular with men my age, I am being offered curated advertisements that are relevant to me based on my demographics, psychology, and my actual web searches and needs described through conversation. This conclusion is very controversial because devices that listen to your voice at all times is creepy, but it is the peak of what target marketing strives to be in its most efficient form. When this form of information gathering and target marketing is perfected, it is hard to say whether our thoughts are truly our own because of the power of suggestion.